#i have muse
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like this post for a starter from riley burkardt~
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The winds have changed direction,,
#for once in a good way#i have MUSE#im gonna see my sibling off to college today since their winter break ended#tidy up my secret santa project since thats due today#but today i feel like writing#i have the muse#i crush her between my fingers#i want to tackle the inbox for some funky fresh and new stuff since drafts are a little daunting today#but baby steps#thank you all for bearing with me its been an insane few weeks#im done moping I think and im ready to take on the world again#( ooc. )
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i'm gonna disappear for a bit so i can drop more t!nder profiles and then rb more inbox memes so we can get the ball rolling but i am v excited idk abt u guys but djhfjh
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im gonna write after work i stg.... at the very least im gonna TRY 😭
#its not even because of a lack of muse#i HAVE muse#i just dont have the writing motivation and it SUCKS#aaaaa im sorry#i know i dont need to apologize but i want to#;sir this is my emotional support cringefail gacha game protagonist. (ooc)
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I've been thinking a lot lately about how Kabru deprives himself.
Kabru as a character is intertwined with the idea that sometimes we have to sacrifice the needs of the few for the good of the many. He ultimately subverts this first by sabotaging the Canaries and then by letting Laios go, but in practice he's already been living a life of self-sacrifice.
Saving people, and learning the secrets of the dungeons to seal them, are what's important. Not his own comforts. Not his own desires. He forces them down until he doesn't know they're there, until one of them has to come spilling out during the confession in chapter 76.
Specifically, I think it's very significant, in a story about food and all that it entails, that Kabru is rarely shown eating. He's the deuteragonist of Dungeon Meshi, the cooking manga, but while meals are the anchoring points of Laios's journey, given loving focus, for Kabru, they're ... not.
I'm sure he eats during dungeon expeditions, in the routine way that adventurers must when they sit down to camp. But on the surface, you get the idea that Kabru spends most of his time doing his self-assigned dungeon-related tasks: meeting with people, studying them, putting together that evidence board, researching the dungeon, god knows what else. Feeding himself is secondary.
He's introduced during a meal, eating at a restaurant, just to set up the contrast between his party and Laios's. And it's the last normal meal we see him eating until the communal ending feast (if you consider Falin's dragon parts normal).
First, we get this:
Kabru's response here is such a non-answer, it strongly implies to me that he wasn't thinking about it until Rin brought it up. That he might not even be feeling the hunger signals that he logically knew he should.
They sit down to eat, but Kabru is never drawn reaching for food or eating it like the rest of his party. He only drinks.
It's possible this means nothing, that we can just assume he's putting food in his mouth off-panel, but again, this entire manga is about food. Cooking it, eating it, appreciating it, taking pleasure in it, grounding yourself in the necessary routine of it and affirming your right to live by consuming it. It's given such a huge focus.
We don't see him eat again until the harpy egg.
What a significant question for the protagonist to ask his foil in this story about eating! Aren't you hungry? Aren't you, Kabru?
He was revived only minutes ago after a violent encounter. And then he chokes down food that causes him further harm by triggering him, all because he's so determined to stay in Laios's good graces.
In his flashback, we see Milsiril trying to spoon-feed young Kabru cake that we know he doesn't like. He doesn't want to eat: he wants to be training.
Then with Mithrun, we see him eating the least-monstery monster food he can get his hands on, for the sake of survival- walking mushroom, barometz, an egg. The barometz is his first chance to make something like an a real meal, and he actually seems excited about it because he wants to replicate a lamb dish his mother used to make him!
...but he doesn't get to enjoy it like he wanted to.
Then, when all the Canaries are eating field rations ... Kabru still isn't shown eating. He's only shown giving food to Mithrun.
And of course the next time he eats is the bavarois, which for his sake is at least plant based ... but he still has to use a coping mechanism to get through it.
I don't think Kabru does this all on purpose. I think Kui does this all on purpose. Kabru's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder should be understood as informing his character just as much as Laios's autism informs his. It's another way that Kabru and Laios act as foils: where Laios takes pleasure in meals and approaches food with the excitement of discovery, Kabru's experiences with eating are tainted by his trauma. Laios indulges; Kabru denies himself. Laios is shown enjoying food, Kabru is shown struggling with it.
And I can very easily imagine a reason why Kabru might have a subconscious aversion towards eating.
Meals are the privilege of the living.
#Dungeon Meshi#Delicious in Dungeon#Kabru#Kabru of Utaya#Laios Touden#Dungeon Meshi meta#you can have him in the tags too. as a treat.#Dungeon Meshi spoilers#this was directly inspired by livelaughlaios's post about Kabru self harming but I decided it got too long to make it a direct reply#this is a theory I've been working on for weeks because I kept noticing this while skimming for screencaps#I'm hesitant to trigger tag this because of the way certain subcultures on tumblr operate#but if anyone needs me to add a content warning please let me know#also I included image descriptions! I did my best#I think they even help illustrate my points but my god were they sad to write. Kabru is so fucking sad you guys#musings with Dea
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sorry i have been a bit dead here i have been working and well ghutighitg all that drains my writing muse , , ,
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another cool thing is when you devour a book over the course of a handful of hours and it fucks you up and you just have to lie on the couch feeling like your brain went swimming for too long & only just came up from under the water. art is so good
#musings#i missed reading things…#more specifically. things not for class#things i don’t have to write essays on. those things
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A @corviiids tweet that is very important to me 🙏 I'm always thinking about spawn Astarion how he loves the sun
#i am spending am unhealthy amount of time thinking about hcs of my durge and astarion going on cute adventures after the game#if you shitpost to my very particular niche vibe you are my muse i cant explain it#is hot spring running water? i think Astarion deserves to have a hot spring vacation#bg3#baldurs gate 3#Astarion#alibonbonn#corviiids#alidraws
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something something "wearing a microfiber cloth in my back pocket to let the best buy employees know I'm cruising" idr how the post goes
#lab creations#gravity falls#fiddleford mcgucket#whenever I'm artblocked I just do another fiddleford pic he's like my muse or something#might be unclear but that's light pink + gray + navy blue on the left and red/black stripe on the right#which could mean nothing#(I personally don't think he would have the time to get into cruising culture. fyi. another example of 'images I just make for fun')
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Watching the new tasting history and very charmed by the fact that the whole Michelin Star system apparently started out as, like, a galaxy-brain marketing campaign for the concept of road trips.
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A couple angry Edgeworths for ya, plus a Gumshoe who’s just happy to be here.
Man he’s so fun to draw. I’m excited to get started on the Investigations remaster! It’ll be my first time playing those games. Looking forwards to seeing Gumshoe and Franziska again, since I’ve gotten through Dual Destinies and Spirit of Justice, which I enjoyed thoroughly but there was a severe lack of those two.
#ace attorney#ace attorney fanart#ace attorney art#miles edgeworth#ace attorney investigations#detective gumshoe#I love this man#my muse#geez all I want to draw is ace attorney fanart this is proving to be a roadblock to every other idea I have#I enjoy doing it but maybe I should do other stuff#just a little#I probably won’t
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Haikyuu S1 screenshot redraw doodle dump! (part 1)
These were so fun to make. I'll upload more.
I do this thing where I screenshot quite literally everything in this, which is both very useful and fun - and a bit creepy cause my screenshot gallery has like a thousand screenshots of volleyball dudes, but I'm having a hell of a good time for sure.
#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#haikyu#kageyama tobio#kagehina#hinata shouyou#hanamaki takahiro#sugawara koushi#yamaguchi tadashi#azumane asahi#nishinoya yuu#oikawa tooru#and iwachan obviously#i did not do them justice here but noya and iwaizumi are amongst my absolute favorite characters#i'll have to draw them better another time#anyway go go karasuno#yall hit a nice serve and everything#MUSE PROPAGANDA (this is an art tag)
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vibes for tonight 👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
#i know the mail in ballots dont get counted immediately#i know the polls tonight wont reflect the polls later#i know harris's rallys have been triple the amount of the orange's#ive heard all the platitudes#doesnt make it any less terrifying :DDD#g muses#art
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idk how many of you remember this but a few years ago tumblr ran a universally panned ad campaign for (us american) pride month that went "the gayest place on the internet".
well someone planning that campaign dropped in to ask the queer automatticians for advice on that and universally me and the other trans people involved were like "don't do it. i am so serious. don't do it. people on tumblr won't understand that it wasn't automattic who instituted the porn ban, or they will, but they'll recognize that automattic hasn't done anything, hands tied or not, to reverse it. nobody will like this. it will be a disaster." and they thanked us for our thoughts and went ahead with it anyway and then had to do retrospectives about how badly it went and were like "we just didn't know" and [gestures] yeah [edit: i think the person who rbed saying it was queerest place on the internet was right, my brain is fried, sorry! and that's... even worse lmao]
#tony muses#hello new followers. for clarity if you are expecting intense amounts of goss about tumblr specifically i am not your person#when automattic first acquired tumblr they asked queer staff who wanted to transfer over to something that was dear to a lot of us#and i specifically did not want to shit where i eat so to speak#which was the right choice. i just have other info about automattic more generally
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On my hike today I ran into a field trip of middle schoolers and showed them the rock I found that was covered in caterpillars. This briefly made me their god. (The middle schoolers. Not the caterpillars. Caterpillars have no god.) They asked many questions until I managed to sneak away while they were distracted by the neat bugs. The next time they saw me I was fifty feet above them on an overlook and back lit by the sun. They screamed with glee. I waved and carried on with my hike. I did not see them again.
#Musings#I will have caterpiller pictures as soon as I find time to sort my pictures#I took my good camera today so I've gotta actually pull the SD card out and load everything up
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