#i have kinda an internal voice? so like i talk in my head and thats usually one of the loudest things in there | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

dopaminergicaddictions · 9 months ago

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Once my birthday is over I'm killing myself. For a lot of the reasons.

1) I'm never going to stop hallucinating...

2) I'm never going to find a girlfriend..

3) i was delusional about Elise...

Why won't I find a girlfriend?

1) I'm trans

2) I'm on disability

3) I have ocd that makes things difficult household wise.

4) once I tell them I hear voices/ have auditory hallucinations no one will date me... I mean unless it's another voice hearer such as myself.... they are the only people who understand that the content varies and its not like, "kill them, Skin them, kill yourself, cut your mothers head off..." thats what people think when you tell them you hear voices.

You immediately go to less of a person. Not a real option. A danger to society and people look at you and treat you differently. They don't feel bad for you. They are scared of you. They look at you like the voice chants, kill everyone you know. Voice hearers and mental health professionals are the only people who understand that the voice could legit say "bounce on a bouncy ball," all day.... sometimes it can be amusing... generally my voice is just repetitive...

I hear, "happy birthday," "I have a birthday present for deadname blanchette," "successful right now," or "successful deadname," "successful Nathan," " this is special," "this is a special place for a reason," "don't Kill yourself," "you love yourself too much to kill yourself," "Elisha Blanchette," and my own thoughts repeating as an auditory hallucination. Rarely does it say anything else. It may say, "I only told you to hug your mother bc I'm psychosis not schizophrenia".... or, "internal peace/silence is coming" but to everyone else on earth I might as well be hearing, "kill them. Catch them, capture them. Skin them. Dismember them."

That's the problem with society and people not understanding mental health issues and especially auditory hallucinations... my voice was never fucking violent. It's mean to me but only so mean it won't say, "I want you to kill yourself." It won't bring up trauma. Although psychosis used to make me see mental pictures of my dogs dying in front of me.... like the very beginning.....but it wasn't the work of the voice... just to state that... it was actually just that all my mental pictures were trauma or sexual in October-December...

But to girls I might as well be a drooling psychopath.... My sister was like maybe you should focus on finding friends cause of your current situation... most people won't be willing to date you. That's why I'm going to kill myself. She thought she was being helpful... how is it helpful to bring up another flaw I have, that I know is on most people's lists of deal-breakers...

And now my dating pool has turned into queer voice hearers. Or queer mental health professionals..... I low key think my current therapist who is a voice hearer with either schizoaffective or schizophrenia wants to end client/therapist and be friends. Her friend request on fb remains. It was submitted 6 week ago when I messaged her to be her client but left her on read for like 4 weeks... she's pretty but yea who knows maybe she just wants to connect socially. She recently asked me when I talked about elise, "do you think you should have any female therapists right now?" I took offense to it cause like I have no feelings for any of my therapists... Erin is older and not my type and tbh she's been texting a lot recently during my sessions and I want to stop seeing her. Yes she's somewhat pretty but I feel nothing for her romantically...

Danielle is pretty but I mean I see her as a therapist. Kristen was gorgeous... and I kinda wanted to be her friend but I wanted her as a therapist more. I didn't want to date her but the elephant was smashing us against the wall making shit awkward. And now I hate her cause she didn't catch it before it turned into this....

Maybe Danielle wants to know me socially.... but Elise is the only therapist I've had feelings for. I don't view her as a therapist. But in terms of Danielle's question... there is only one person and it's bc of the close personal relationship we shared which boundaries were crossed... the boundaries being crossed isn't why I have feelings for Elise... but it is the reason I'm still fixated on her... I mean sorta. If everything ended the way it was suppose to I would still think about her but I wouldn't be writing on tumblr. I would probably be with Katie again becuase i would have shown up for the bunny picture she posted on fb in July and she would have taken me back bc her dog tries to eat them and it traumatizes her. I only didnt show up because I have feelings for Elise and I knew me and Katie would be together if I did. And be hopeful one day Elise would show up and we could be friends.

Either queer voice hearers have now become my only dating option other than mental health professionals. Or people who have a brother or sister and get it's not, "kill them," people including my Dr's write me off and talk to me like I've lost my personhood.

So yea. I'm pretty done with my shitty life. I doubt elise is going to show up for me. I mean when I think about those eyes I think she will, but then I look at actions. Blocked nearly everywhere. And she didn't respond to me professionally.... so I guess I'm meaningless shit to her. But who knows. All I know ow is actions speak louder than words. I remember her previous actions and they speak very loudly... but as for right now her actions say you're a drooling psychopath and I may be keeping you unblocked bc I'm worried you'll use it against me. WHICH I NEVER WOULD. Cause I love her.

Either way Danielle's questions was offensive cause I never talked positively about Kristen. She might as well be the devil to me. Also I never talked about Erin other than thats she's my therapist. Maybe it's bc she finds me attractive and wants to know me socially and we are only 3 weeks in... the only therapist I've talked about romantically or even in terms of attraction is Elise..... and it's very clear I don't see as a therapist... it'd very clear i see her person to person... that's the thing. Nonetheless it was offensive. Bc of all these facts

Factually- i have never had feelings for a therapist.... never. Not one of them. Attraction is a little different... but Attraction is meaningless to me. I'm about love. I think Megan fox is pretty but I don't want to have sex with her. I especially don't want to be with her...

I have to love you to want to be with you. Elise i saw as a peer... not day one but by the year mark we were person to person. Not therapist to client.

The sad thing is- Before I met Elise, therapists were just asshole who sat on their ass and made money off your problems and couldn't give a shit about your life or your feelings and you were just money in their wallet...

Then i met Elise and- that fucking changed. I started to see therapists as person to person. I started to see they do care about you personally and you're not just money.

I fell in love with her but that besides the point before that happened-shes the reason I feel that therapists do care about their clients. That they see me and anyone else they see as a person.

Although I do think generally the therapist sees the client as a person but on a lower level.. not that they are better than them but that they have a professional duty to them.. and that makes ot less person to person.

When I talk to any therapist now thanks to Elise-I see it person to person.

However-me and elise were different. Part of doesn't want to force her hand and make her meet with me Profesional despite the fact that it will help but--->

The reality is we really were person to person. Different than anyone else. The dynamic changed and we changed. There was something there. And it's only her. But anyways I'm crazy and she doesn't read this but writing helps. Tbh I'm prob going to stop writing here soon. I've been hopeful she might read it but If she sees me as dangerous or crazy. Maybe i should commit my writing to paper and pen and keep it from the world.

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whonsper · 5 years ago

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i have a question: wtf is an internal monologue???

apparently ive been thinking about them wrong for years. i just want to know if its an actual monologue. can you hear your own voice/multiple voices in your head??

idk someone dm me about this im so curious now i thought it was a nonstop stream of thoughts, cuz thats whats going on for me. but i cant understand things im thinking unless i say them out loud

#i just watched a video and it was like 'very few people dont have internal monologues and ive found one person without one' im like huh?#she was just like yeah i have to talk to myself i cant hear things (side note the entire comment section was like can she not hear things)#im like you can still have a song stuck in your head. you just cant hear your thoughts cuz wtf is up with that thats so weird???#but yeah im very curious #im actually probably only halfway between the two cuz i cant hear things in my mind ever but like i dont have to always say things #like to understand what im thinking. but i do sometimes haveto focus very hard on the words im reading in order to block out the noise #just through sheer like yk when you kinda black out a bit and cant hear or see yeah kinda a bit like that except intentional.#idk what im saying but imma go to sleep pls someone dm me or send an ask or respond cuz im very curious #am i misinterpreting this? am i normal?? or do most people literally hear a voice narrating their thoughts for them?

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fallowfield-moved · 5 years ago

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i'm gonna be honest and i hate this fact but i think i learned most of my speech and vocal/social patterns from anime

#i mean. the way i talk is super similar to a LOT of characters in most ways in most Japanese media #i just say anime because thats what i have the most exposure to #i also just kinda share speech patterns with Griffin McElroy bc i like how his voice sounds and i imitate it a LOT #its not intentional i just copy his delivery because his tone is super calming to me and ive kinda. internalized it yknow lol #OK what i mean is. i follow a lot of speech patterns that speak primarily Japanese follow that people who dont wouldnt follow #so in my head dialogue plays out very differently because thats what i viewed for a long time and i dont understand why its so hard #for people to understamd why i say 'yes' and 'yeah' aloud like im agreeing but im just letting you know im still listening. i may not agree #sid.txt

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sukunasweetheart · 2 years ago

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ceo!sukuna x intern! (female) reader

listen, ik how taboo this is irl, but for the sake of romance, imma need you to hear me out for a sec

of course, it all starts with you, the clumsy, nervous intern in your first week in this big ass company that you somehow managed to get accepted into. as in intern, you’re more likely to go the extra length to be acknowledged by everyone in your office, so you volunteer to grab a few of your coworkers’ a coffee from the cafe thats on the first level of the building.

you’re kinda struggling with the drinks, but somehow you’re managing to hold them all. but since you’re so absorbed with balancing them in your hands you fail in noticing the person ahead of you, right as you begin speedwalking.

a loud exclaim (that came out from your mouth) rings in the lobby, along with one of the drinks spilling over... onto the clothes of the person standing before you. you are so lucky that it was the iced coffee, not the one of the hot ones.

you’re already frantically apologising - giving him 90 degree bows, while still balancing the coffees in your hands. the man is irked by his ruined suit, yet, slightly amused by how silly you look, bowing like that with terror in your eyes. you’re mostly intimidated by the person with the bobcut standing beside him, glaring at you intensely.

“i-i’m so sorry sir, is-is there anything i could do to compensate-”

“just keep walking,” the man dismisses you. “i’m well off enough to pay for my own laundry fees.”

“um, well, is there anything else i could do to help? i feel really bad,” you say, staring at the big coffee stain.

“anything you can do?” he repeats. “let’s see...i’ll think about it.” there is obvious sarcasm embedded in his voice.

“pardon...?” you ask, thoroughly confused.

“i’ll see you around,” the pink haired man then reaches out and grabs your company id card that dangles down your chest,

“y/n.”

you’re frozen in place, as the man’s face is closer to yours. he then drops the card and resumes his walking as it falls back into place against you. you stare at his back until he disappears from sight, wondering what the hell that whole thing was about.

“uraume, arrange a new set of clothes for me,” sukuna orders as they enter the ceo-exclusive elevator up to the top of the building.

“yes sir. would you like me to take care of that intern for you as well?”

“no, you can leave her. i have other plans.”

back in your office, the moment you mention the fact that you’d bumped and spilled coffee onto some pink haired man in the lobby, all heads turn to you.

“y/n, that wasn’t...the ceo, right?”

“the ceo? does he have pink hair...?” you’d only known his name, not how he looked like. and how he was rumoured to be extremely temperamental.

when everyone nods at you, your whole world comes collapsing down. in your first week, as an intern, you ruined the clothes of the one person you should’ve avoided by all means.

and surely, a few days later, the same bobcut employee that had stood by his side during that incident comes into the office in search of someone.

“the ceo wishes to have a talk with the intern, y/n.”

you immediately get escorted to his office.

the moment you take a seat before sukuna, he slides over a contract for you to sign, on the expensive looking glass table.

“as per your suggestion, i’ve found something that you can do to help me,” he speaks with falsified smile.

“become my secretary. along with uraume, that is.”

just how did a coffee-stained suit snowball into something like this?

tagging; @i4sgwr 😉

Masterlist

#plot twist sukuna just wants someone he can torment right next to him haha #sukuna #sukuna x reader #ryomen sukuna x reader #sukuna x you #ryomen sukuna x you #sukuna x y/n #ryomen sukuna

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albertdabuttler · 2 years ago

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FaceTime? II | F.W.

MASTERLIST

fandom: Harry Potter

PART I - PART II - PART III

pairings: Fred Weasley x F!Reader

WARNINGS: shit ton of cursing again heh, HELLA FLUFF, smut, masturbating (m), phone sex? not really… voice kink, thats it ig

summary: !!MODERN AU!! Fred calls you in the middle of the night because he can’t sleep but then he sees how goddamn good you look and can’t help himself…

WC: 4.5k

A/N: PART TWO MFS, this is like the first time I’m very motivated to write. EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN DORMS.

Also, please let me know if I made any mistakes!! And I’m very happy to do requests!

gif by me but it looks so bad.. BUT FRED’S HOT SO ITS KINDA SEXY 🤪

NOT intended for minors under 16. But if you read it idc, I probably wouldn’t have cared if there was an age limit either 😭

———————

Fred had been plopped on his bed for the past hour, staring at his ceiling as he waited to get tired and finally fall asleep. He was a chronic insomniac and barely ever got his brain to shut off, thinking of all the stupid pranks he could pull or joke gadgets he could make.

A sigh came from him, turning over on his side and looking at the picture of you, himself, and George from the summer.

He caught himself staring a little too intensely at you.

You were so goddamn beautiful.

…

Well, it wasn’t a secret. You were probably one of the prettiest girls in the school and Fred knew that. Everyone did…

Although that didn’t mean that he liked you. He couldn’t. It would irrevocably fuck up your friendship and he’d never be able to live with that.

But he didn’t even try to stop his mind from wandering this time. He finally realized he liked you. For the longest time.

He remembered sitting down next to you at a Gryffindor party for a quidditch win and that you put your arm around him as you sipped your juice, later turning to him with a charmingly adorable smile and saying, with the most angelic voice,

“Hey, Freddie. You looked good out there today.”

Your faces were so close together and he would have sworn he felt something, the look in your eyes was telling him so much and it gave him enough butterflies that he could have thrown up flowers.

He was so determined on finally making a move now. He would either kiss you like a crazy dumbass who would probably get rejected brutally on the spot, or he’d tell you he loved you and and hoped you took it the way he meant it and reciprocated it, but if you made a weird face then he would say “as a friend though…” And he would be safe.

But at that moment, right before he could, some other dumb Gryffindor boy had called to talk to you and he couldn’t help but frown, jealousy overtaking him.

Goddammit!

Fred turned flat on his back. He needed to stop thinking about you.

What the fuck is my problem?

He thought, cringing at his creepy infatuation.

How could he not? You were really pretty…Rolling his eyes, he let himself think about you again. After all, he was alone.

He was sure you made fantasies about whatever stupid boy you liked too.

Turning his head to look at your picture again, he really admired you now. You were so funny, playful, you cared about him, you helped him with his dumb homework, and lord, you were hot as fuck.

Fred felt his breath hitch at the thought of you on top of him, using him as some sucker toy to get yourself off.

He quickly brushed away the thought and bit his lip hard to scold himself for thinking something so nasty.

Turning to his nightstand, he picked up his phone which had a silly picture of you and him as his background, and quickly texted you to get his mind off whatever the hell he was thinking.

F| you awake - 12:53

Fred’s mind trailed off to how soft your lips would feel against his, you putting your arms around his neck and tugging at the hair on the nape of his neck, his hands moving up and down your sides.

GODDAMMIT FRED, CHILL THE FUCK OUT!

Yeah.. At this point he was internally yelling at himself for all of these stupid thoughts.

He thought about spamming you to get up because he definitely couldn’t handle these kind of thoughts by himself if you didn’t reply.

F| bruh - 12:55

F| wake up i cant sleep - 12:55

F| HEY - 12:56

F| WAJE THE FUCK UO - 12:56

He sighed that you didn’t reply yet.

F| .. please - 12:57

F| please ;( - 12:57

A real frown drooped over his mouth as he turned his phone off and put it over his chest, his left hand behind his head as he stared at the ceiling again, trying to make his mind go blank.

There was a buzz and he immediately turned his phone back on, hoping and crossing all his fingers that it was you.

<3| what do you want - 12:57

He smiled at his phone and replied,

F| for you to wake up - 12:57

He mentally facepalmed.

For you to wake up? Seriously? What class of dumbass am I.

<3| well im awake now so what - 12:57

He played it cool and typed in his thoughts.

F| i cant stop thinking about you -

Fuck no. What?

Deleting his insane confession, he wrote and sent something simple.

F| i cant sleep and im bored as hell - 12:58

Keep it simple. Yeah… Godric, why was he overthinking?

<3| i know your goofy ass did not just wake me up because you cant fucking fall asleep - 12:58

Fred really didn’t like it when you were mad at him, so it only made sense for him to make a joke. Right…?

F| hold on, you mean my goofy and FAT AND LUCIOUS ASS, right? - 12:58

<3| im going to beat the fucking shit out of you tmr - 12:58

Fred smirked to himself, his heart skipping at the thought of you two “wrestling”, his smile dropped and he felt as if there was an actual fire burning its way from his inner chest up to his head.

Before he could have said some dumb shit like “I’d pay all my savings just so see you try, shortie ;)”, you replied.

<3| and its luscious* 🥱 - 12:58

Rolling his eyes, Fred smiled at his phone, you had a tendency to correct people, and although many found this annoying, he found it cute without realizing it.

<3| if you actually fuckinf studied basic english you’d probably know how to spell it, but your goofy - not fat and luscious - ass is too busy setting living human beings on fire - 12:59

His jaw dropped as he stared at his phone in awe, seeing as you had the audacity to bring up his academic failure and were accusing him of pranking people to hurt them.

F| FUCK YOU - 12:59

F| i prank people i dont hurt them 🙄 - 12:59

And yes, of course he noticed your hypocrisy.

F| also you misspelled fucking - 12:59

F| also yeah my ass is fat and luscious and all the girls want it - 12:59

Fred hadn’t even the slightest idea how that would work in making you jealous. It was clear to everyone at Hogwarts that he attracted many girls but it wasn’t enough for him.

None of them were you.

He wrote again before you could say something that could get to his head.

F| you just dont wanna say that bcs then that would mean you’ve actually looked at it and i know you’d absolutely hate to admit that ;)) - 1:00

No.. That winky face is too flirty.

F| also im not the goofy one here anymore, your silly swan looking ass face wants to fight me - 1:00

That definitely wasn’t true, Fred thought you were probably the prettiest girl in the universe but he didn’t want you to know he thought that. Or even think he did.

F| can you believe that shit 😹 - 1:00

He probably shouldn’t keep going…

F| you actually wanna fight someone who’s like twice your size, the fuck do you think you are - 1:01

That was so fucking harsh, it almost sounded like he was seriously being rude. What kind of dumbass says shit like that to the person they like?

<3| fred if you dont shut the fuck up and go to bed, im telling your mom you had a girl in your room. - 1:01

A frown found its way onto his lips, his eyebrows scrunching up in disappointment, he wanted to talk to you so fucking badly, how the hell can one screw that up?

This never happened before. It was so damn easy talking to you without overthinking a single word, but now it’s like he watches every last syllable that comes out of his mouth or is typed through his fingers, you were his best friend. This shit is supposed to be a breeze.

F| … okay im sorry :( - 1:01

An apology was probably the best way to go at the moment. He thought maybe you noticed his weird attitude too and just got sick of it and went to sleep, and that maybe that was why you left him on seen.

Throwing his phone next to him, he sighed loudly, covering his face with his hands and groaning.

What the hell was his problem? Why couldn’t Fred Gideon fucking Weasley talk to a girl? His best fucking friend for fucks sake?! This was supposed to be easy, taking in account his reputation with the ladies.

Maybe it was the fact that since this school year started, he hadn’t really dated anyone. Much less have intercourse. So there was a lot of internal tension in him.

But he didn’t want to. The thought of sex with anyone in this school or at all was disgusting to him. Even masturbating. Which was odd for Fred Weasley, and the fact that he was, well... A guy.

The only time in which is wasn’t so gross was when he thought of you.

Godric, that sounds so pervy.

But it was true. When he did think about it, it wasn’t like fucking.

It was more like…

Like making love.

To you…

Making you feel so good, pleasing you and stretching you out, feeling your soft bare skin against his and being so incredibly close to you that he wouldn’t ever want to let go.

The thought of you actually wanting to be with him the same way made his heart flutter.

It also made him a little horny.

Shifting position so he had his left hand over his tummy and his right behind his head, he turned to look at the empty spot next to him.

Godric, was he fucking lonely.

No one to keep him company at night.

Not for the past eight months.

Valentine’s day was coming up, and he had no one to spend it with.

Low chance on it being with you since he was an absolute pussy after the Gryffindor party, unless it was platonic.

He reached out to grab his phone and text you again.

F| hey im really sorry for waking you up and then acting like a douche - 1:03

F| i don’t wanna bother you but do you wanna facetime? - 1:04

F| talking to you is really nice - 1:04

He hesitated before sending his next message.

Fuck it.

F| thats why i always only text you and no one else, you actually make me feel better - 1:04

This was literally a direct confession that you were the only one who could make him feel better.

F| come onnnn - 1:04

He had to cut off the sentiments though.

F| bruh if you dont answer rn im telling cormac you have a big fat crush on him - 1:04

Knowing you absolutely despised Cormac was the reasoning behind why he said that.

<3| fuck you - 1:05

He smiled.

F| i mean… - 1:05

F| if you really want to then i guess i can make an arrangement. - 1:05

Damn, I have to lay off the flirting.

The next moment, he saw his face through the camera, his eyes widening as he realized you were actually calling him.

His heart rate quickened as he fumbled to fix his hair and tried to click the answer button but his thumb kept missing it.

Turning to his right side facing his nightstand, he stuffed his left under his face as he finally got it and clicked the answer button, keeping a straight face, yours popping up with an annoyed expression.

You snorted and he had to smile, trying his hardest not to give in until you sent him a smolder, his lips curling up into a wide grin as he tried not to laugh.

“You’re so dumb” he couldn’t help but keep smiling, he knew you knew he wasn’t being serious when he said that, you two would only ever say it to each other when you were goofing around.

“Oh I’m dumb? Says the one who needs his favorite person to fall asleep and can’t spell ‘luscious’.” you scoffed sarcastically but smiled back at him.

“You think you’re my favorite person? Getting cocky are we?” he smirked, challenging you.

“Yeah, am I not?” you asked.

His smirk grew wider, yes you were his absolute favorite and nothing or no one could ever change his mind, but he couldn’t tell you that.

“Yeah, you’re one of my favorites.”

He heard you chuckle and thought it was the cutest sound to come out of you.

The hottest sounds would be the ones where he’s on top of you.

“What are you doing on Friday? Wanna go to Hogsmead?” you asked.

“Yeah sure, I’ve got a prank to play on Snape so you’ve gotta come with me to that first, you’re my lucky charm.” he answered.

He internally cringed, that was the cheesiest thing he’s ever said in his whole entire life.

“That sounds… Not so platonic, Fred. What are you implying?” you joked.

His palms got sweaty as this was probably one of the first times you took something in the way he meant it.

Romantically.

“Oh, shut up.” he scoffed, “You know that’s not what I meant.” he was definitely lying.

“You’re just fun to have around.”

“Just fun? You don’t love me?” you pouted and his heart only melted.

He hesitated, of course he loved you, it was just hard for him to tell you since he meant it in more than a platonic way.

“…Well when you put it like that…” he said it in a silly voice.

You threw your head back in laughter and he couldn’t help but giggle.

Merlin, she’s so adorable.

You kept on laughing and he admired you, you were so fucking perfect, everything a guy would want and more.

His head would spin whenever you’d lean onto him on the common room sofa.

Your perfume was intoxicating and it was hard for him to look you straight in the eyes for more than five seconds before his mind went into the gutter. Your smile was probably his favorite feature since he was so good at bringing it out.

He looked at you and saw that your mind was somewhere else, you lightly shook your head a couple of times and he knew you came back.

But he noticed your eyes moving lower on the screen.

She’s checking me out, huh.

Your smile faded and there was a slight crease in between your eyebrows.

Smirking to himself, a light pink dusted his cheeks, the thought of you looking at him in that particular way made his self esteem higher, but he didn’t get too cocky. It was possible you were thinking of something else, which he thought was most likely the case, but he couldn’t stop thinking about things.

You blinked a couple of times.

“So….” you said.

“So?” he repeated, he still had the smile on his face.

His eyes squinted, he recognized the shirt you were wearing.

“Um I was-“

“Wait is that that stupid old shirt George got you for Christmas 5th year?” he interrupted, although he didn’t mean to.

You chuckled again, “Yeah.”

As you stretched your arms out to show him, it was so incredibly difficult for him not to notice your cleavage. Or your hard nipples.

The shirt was oversized but it was close enough to your skin to show that.

Fred swallowed, he felt his pants tighten but tried to ignore it and avoid the filthy thoughts that were flooding into his brain right now.

“Wow, I can’t believe it still fits you.” he chuckled nervously and you followed with a chuckle too.

“I mean it’s only been about two years, not like I’ve grown that much since then. Plus, George got it like two sizes too big.” you laughed.

He smiled at your laugh, he’d never get enough of it.

“You know, I had the perfect gift for you but I lost it two days before Christmas that year. I think someone stole it and I was so sad that I couldn’t give it to you.” he said.

You had a sweet smile, “Awh. What was it?”

Now he regretted telling you.

“I’m not telling you.” he smirked.

“Bruh come on. You lost it so just tell me, it’s not like you’re going to die if you do.”

He inhaled sharply, “Yeah well I don’t want to. If it’s such a pain in your ass then I’ll tell you this, it was an inside joke from third year.” He was lying for most of it.

“Wait lemme think…” you looked up, bit your lip and were so focused, it was so hot and Fred was using all his will power to compose himself as he felt his pants get even tighter.

“Ah! I know! Was it the time you and I snuck off in the middle of the night and caught Snape reading that really cheesy poem out loud? I forgot what it was about but I remember it was really funny. You wouldn’t shut up about it for weeks.” you guessed.

“No, that’s not it. Not even close.” he said.

It was actually a necklace made of pure platinum, a thin chain with a little heart shaped locket that had a picture of you, him and George from when you were little.

Around the locket was a ton of other little charms made from tiny rubies, emeralds, diamonds, all the expensive shit you could think of.

One of them was in the shape of a crow, made from obsidian. That was the inside joke from third year.

It was when a crow landed on your fucking head and Fred laughed his ass off while you screamed if fear and agony.

So not only did it have current value, but it had an emotional value and you’d guess the joke counts too.

But he thought it was too “unfriendly” so he just gave you a black leather bracelet like the ones that him and George had that matched.

He still has that necklace, it was never stolen.

“I have no idea then.” you said.

Looking at you, he smiled. He was starting to get pretty hard but he was a fucking professional at hiding it.

Fred noticed how you looked away, “Look at me.”

He slipped his hand out from under his face and moved it down to his pants.

His dick was throbbing and he hadn’t touched it in months. The tip was already sticky and he tried so hard not to palm himself, so he gripped the bottom of his shirt until his knuckles turned white.

Smirking at his own thoughts and also at you, he could tell you were nervous.

Maybe you did like him.

“What” you said when you turned to him.

“Let’s have a staring contest.” he said.

Fred was definitely the type to love eye contact during sex.

“That’s dumb.” you said.

“You’re dumb.” he retorted.

“No, I actually study. You spend all your time making jokes and pranking people and you never study. You always only study with me and I literally do like 80% of the w-“

He cut you off at the stupid argument you were trying to make.

“Just stop talking,” he said with a small giggle as he kept looking at you with his smile.

You both sighed.

“Damn okay.” you said.

Fred kept a small smile but couldn’t fucking take it any longer and he needed relief.

Squirming. he slipped his hand into his pants, wrapping his hand all the way around the base of his cock and squeezing.

He chewed the inside of his lip at the feeling, slowly starting to drag his hand up and down.

Fred saw that you looked away and his eyebrows knotted as he mouthed a “fuck me please.”

But his expression went back to how it was before as your eyes moved across the screen again.

Moving his hand with a rough movement, his eyes almost closed shut in pleasure, but he needed to see you.

“If you’re about to fall asleep then we can just talk tomorrow. Unless—you’re sure… you wanna stay on call…?” you asked him.

His hand moved back up as he brushed his thumb over the tip. He almost groaned when he tried to reply.

“M-Yeah…” He sighed and his eyes fluttered shut at the tender feeling between his thighs.

“You look like you’re on the verge of falling asleep into oblivion, Freddie.” he heard you giggle.

The way you said his name had him in a trance. Your voice, it was so hot, the pitch was perfect and he could only imagine what it would sound like if he was ramming the soul out of you.

All the pretty sounds you’d make.

Fuck.

With his hand starting to pick up his pace just a little bit, his eyes rolled back at the incredible feeling.

This felt so good with you basically watching.

He turned his head into his pillow and let out a groan that he hoped wasn’t too audible by you.

His hand wasn’t moving fast enough to get him off and it was excruciating.

A small cry came from him as he turned back to look at you, eyebrows furrowed, hooded watery eyes, and his mouth slightly open like he was about to spill his soul out.

“I-I’m gonna go to bed.” he choked out, lying.

He needed to finish so badly and just couldn’t go fast enough with you watching, for you’d probably notice the movement in his arm and he would lose his shit if you told him you knew what he was doing.

An expression of sadness spread across your face and it just turned him on even more. “Oh, okay, goodnight then, I love you.”

Holy fucking shit.

He had absolutely no choice but to say it back.

His face was so red and he knew it, and he knew that you knew it, which only made it worse.

“I love you too…” A sigh fell from his lips at another rough stroke, “So much.”

His face scrunched up at the almost pain in his cock since he wasn’t going quick enough.

He heard the hang up tone but double checked that you weren’t still there as he let out a loud groan.

“Fuuuuuck….” he dragged out.

Taking his hand off his dick, he pulled off his pants in order to make it easier for himself.

As soon as he got them off, he laid on his back and his hand immediately went back to his throbbing piece.

He started moving his hand up and down, a tight grip with his pace only getting faster by the minute. His thoughts were flooded with you.

This is her hand, not mine.

The affirmation only helped him get closer to the edge. His thumb moved to brush over the tip again, picturing your pretty lips wrapped around him and your soft tongue swirling on his tip as you looked at him with innocent eyes.

No doubt, Fred felt really fucking guilty for touching himself at the thought of you.

He couldn’t help himself though.

Heavy breathing started to make its appearance, his head turned to the picture on his nightstand.

He sighed again heavily, picking up his pace as he felt the knot starting to form in his stomach.

“Godric, I want you so bad.” he whispered. No one could hear him but he couldn’t keep it in. His eyes fluttered shut again, throwing his head back as he felt himself almost getting there.

A buzz came from his phone.

It slightly distracted him but he needed to cum.

The room began getting too hot, he sat up, taking his hand off his cock again and tugging off his shirt. The cool air of the room giving him a more relaxing feeling since his skin was already starting to glisten with sweat.

He stayed sitting up and propped himself up on his left hand, leaning on it in order not to fall back.

He grabbed his cock again and started pumping, his head hanging back once again.

“Fuck.”

Your name started spilling from his mouth as he was nearing climax, his breaths were heavy and his eyebrows knitted together, he felt the coil snap as his mouth fell open and he let out a groan, his cum squirting out and spilling all over his fingers and his stomach.

He continued to stroke himself to ride out his high, a hard bite onto his lips at the extraordinary feeling of an orgasm after about five months without one.

He plopped onto his back again, a sigh of guilt coming from him.

he put his sticky-free hand behind his head as he stared at the ceiling.

Jerking off wasn’t enough.

He needed you.

The buzzing of his phone scared him shitless as he quickly grabbed it to see who the fuck was calling him.

You.

“HOLY FUCK!” he yelled, almost smacking his mouth with his jizz-covered hand but was quick enough to stop it.

He laid back down, making sure the spot on his stomach with all his semen was out if view of the camera. And his hand too.

He picked up, “Yeah?”

“Are you okay, Freddie?” you said, his heart skipped at the nickname.

“Uhm…” he licked his lips and looked at his hand, cock, and belly, which were covered in the white substance. He kind of… played with it, while he thought of what to say.

“…Yeah, I’m fine. I just had a long and… stressful day with… uh, grades.” Fred looked back up at you, his hand still messing with his jizz while he waited for you to say whatever you needed to say.

“Erm okay well… Goodnight then I guess… See you at breakfast.”

He could tell there was something wrong but he didn’t want to say anything so he chuckled and replied, “Goodnight then, love.”

You hung up and he let out a sigh of relief, standing up to get a warm wet towel and clean himself up.

When he was done, he came back and got in his sheets again, hair hair still sticking to his forehead from sweat.

Another buzz coming from his phone.

<3| can i go to your room? - 1:37

His heart stopped, thinking of all the things you two could do.

It started beating again at a superhuman pace after he replied.

F| of course, love - 1:37

———————

thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed the fic. Follow me if you want, or not, bcs i dont post more than once a week.

TAGLIST

@mariaurmum @butterbeerkiss @that-lame-ghoul9000 @cuttingmeinhalf @freddie-weaselbee @katiea-21 @missslurpie @vvile-soul @urfavluna @soularsmate

there were quite a few people I couldn’t tag since their blogs wouldn’t pop up :/ sorry if I missed you, I hope you see this!

#harry potter #harry potter smut #hp smut #fred weasley #fred weasley fluff #fred weasley smut #fred weasley fic rec #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley fanfiction #hp fic rec #harry potter fandom

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adoringhaikyuu · 3 years ago

Text

they reject you and regret it afterwards

CHARACTERS: kuroo + iwaizumi + osamu + (gn!reader)

REQUEST: pspspsps i hope its okay if i drop my request here since i saw that yours are open :D can you maybe do how kuroo, iwaizumi and osamu rejects reader confession ( they are best friend ) because they have feelings for another person but later they regret it when they moved on? i love it when the boys realize it later how much the reader means to them but y/n took the chance to move on and have a sexy glow up ✋😩 yessss i wanna see them suffer at the end >:) • by anonymous

WARNINGS: dumb boys hurting your feelings and you hurting them right back :/

NOTES: i feel like i’m not too good at writing angst lol but i made these blurbs instead of hcs!

kuroo let you down easy, not wanting to hurt your feelings––to be honest he did feel something for you, but he wasn’t sure if it was what you wanted it to be. he felt more certain of the feelings he had for someone else. someone you slowly watched him admire from afar until he worked up the courage to start joking with them, then offering to buy them lunch and so on.

you still remember the awkward smile he gave you when you confessed to him, the smile that absolutely broke you because it showed you how much he didn’t want you the way you wanted him. not enough to give up his efforts with someone else. “i’m flattered y/n, but i’m sorry i just––you know i have a date this week...”

you’d looked down immediately, unable to look him in the eyes longer and swallowed back the lump in your throat that was aching to come up in a sob. “yeah yeah, i’m sorry i just––let’s forget this ever happened, yeah?”

you gave him your most convincing smile and he agreed, wanting everything to be normal between the two of you.

but it wasn’t until he’d gone on a few dates with them to realize that it didn’t feel right. it didn’t feel familiar, the way he thought it would. it wasn’t the same comfort he felt in your presence. when they texted him, he didn’t feel the same burst of happiness he felt when you messaged him. he tried to wait it out, to see if things would change, but they didn’t. they just weren’t you.

it’d been a few weeks since you’d confessed and gotten rejected, but you decided to move on instead of dwelling on his unrequited feelings––it wouldn’t do you any good to wallow and weep over your best friend. you wanted him to be happy, and you deserved to be too. so you knocked yourself out of that sad headspace and changed yourself up a bit. you started to value yourself better than you did before, you dressed the way you wanted to but were always afraid of doing and everything about you just brightened up. and other people noticed as well.

kuroo had kind of been too preoccupied to notice, if he was being honest. he didn’t realize what he had in front of him until he practically sprinted over to your place to surprise you and be honest about his feelings. you opened the door, already dressed up and kuroo took a step back, eyes widening as they took you in. did you always look this breathtaking?

“wow...”

you smiled gratefully, straightening out your clothes. “thanks, that’s what i was going for.” you walked back into your apartment to get your shoes, “not that i mind but what are you doing here?”

he blinked out of his trance and stepped in, closing the door behind him. “oh i just––i brought us some food.” he raised the bag he was holding even though you weren’t facing him. “i was kinda hoping we could spend some time together...” he scratched the back of his head, “maybe talk about a few things...” he trailed off when something clicked in his head as he watched you slip your shoes on. “wait why are you all dressed up?”

you turned and looked at him apologetically, “oh...i’m sorry kuroo,” you paused, “i actually have somewhere to be. can i take a raincheck?”

he opened his mouth for a few seconds as he watched you, but no sound came out. “oh um...well could i just––wait here? until you get back?”

you looked to the side awkwardly bringing one hand up to hold your other arm. “it’s just that...i might not be alone when i come back.”

as soon as you uttered those words, he could feel his heartbeat falter in his chest, a faint ringing noise in his ears.

“...a date?”

you nodded with a smile and though it’s selfish, he felt a part of him dim on the inside when he noticed how excited you were. he didn’t really have a right to stop you now did he, not when you chose his happiness over your own what felt like way long ago. so he wouldn’t.

he nodded as well, “oh” he forced a smile onto his face and stepped back towards the door, “that’s exciting. i’m happy for you, really.” he turned the door knob, “i’ll catch up with you some other time then, yeah? you’ll tell me how it went.” he looked at you one last time, his gaze wavering under the undeterred happiness radiating from you.

when he finally stepped out and closed your door, all the emotions hit him at once. he didn’t know what hurt the most, the fact that he was too late, or the fact that you didn’t stop him, didn’t notice the pleading look in his eyes as he silently begged you to stay with him.

iwaizumi froze when you told him how you felt. it was the smallest reaction you’d ever seen from him before, the calmest––yet it did anything but soothe you. you could see the hesitation in his eyes, the uncertainty of what to say next in the way his mouth opened but produced no sound. you already knew what he was going to say.

he will admit, seeing the tears in your eyes that you barely managed to blink back when he rejected you did strike a blow to his heart. but he just couldn’t tell you what you wanted to hear, he wouldn’t lie to you. “i––i’m sorry y/n i just...don’t feel the same.”

his eyes were apologetic, almost pitiful as he watched you take a step back, “right, right. that’s––that’s okay.” you tried to smile but it felt more like a grimace. “i just didn’t want to keep it to myself, that’s all. i’m sure i’ll get over it soon.” he nodded but wasn’t sure what else to say. so he didn’t say anything.

things were a little awkward for a couple weeks between the two of you, but you didn’t want to lose your friendship, so you eventually moved on.

it wasn’t until one day you were at the café you always went to together that you noticed him taking longer than usual to bring back your drinks. you looked over to see him chatting with the barista, both of them with nervous smiles on their faces. he came back a few minutes later with a note in his pocket that you assumed was the barista’s number and a blush on his cheeks. he placed your drink in front of you, eyes looking down, and didn’t mention anything, probably since he didn’t want to rub it in, so you didn’t bring it up either.

but you did wonder if they were the reason he didn’t feel the same for you––you wondered if they weren’t in the picture, if he would have fallen for you instead.

he didn’t want to hide anything from you, so he told you when he had a date coming up. you wished him luck and told him you hoped he’d have a good time and that was that.

they ended up dating but you didn’t mind. he seemed happy and you truly did want the best for him. you started focusing on yourself and eventually found a boyfriend, one who appreciated you and loved you and you couldn’t ask for more.

iwaizumi was happy for you as well, but he couldn’t ignore this piercing feeling he felt when he first heard the news, then when he would see you two together, on your double dates, at parties, anywhere, really. something just ticked him off. he knew he didn’t have a right to feel this way, but he couldn’t help it, couldn’t make sense of it. he couldn’t even figure out what it meant.

only once he realized the ache he felt in his chest when you smiled at your boyfriend the way you used to smile at him, the pull at his heart when you kissed his cheek, completely enamored. only then did he realize that he was jealous, that he’d made a mistake, that he’d lost the one chance he had of being with his soulmate.

osamu had just gotten his new restaurant, he was achieving his goals, living his life without fear, and you took inspiration from that. you decided to be upfront about your brewing feelings and ask him out just as he put the finishing touches in the establishment.

he was wiping down the counter as you sat at the bar, swallowing your nerves as you watched him. “hey samu?”

he hummed and glanced up at you for a second before looking back to what he was doing.

you took a deep breath, “would you maybe...want to go out to eat tomorrow?”

he didn’t look up, but his brows furrowed, “yeah? why are you even asking?”

you paused, of course he wouldn’t realize what you meant, you guys ate together all the time. you blinked a few times before clearing your throat, “um i just––i meant as a...date?”

this time, he paused, well more like froze. he kept his eyes on the counter, his face blank, but you could tell he was internally processing everything. did he hear you right? “what?”

you considered taking it back, but you had a feeling he did hear you, he just wasn’t sure how to respond. “um...i asked if you wanna go on a date? with me...”

he nodded and straightened up, “right.” he brought a hand up to scratch the back of his head, finally looking at you and the look in his eyes was enough to make your wavering confidence crumble. “i sort of have my eye on someone else right now...” you nodded, trying not to let the tears form in your eyes. he went on, “my new neighbor needed to borrow something and we got to talking...was thinking of asking them out, actually.” that was the final twist of the knife.

“oh...” your voice was small ”thats––that’s great!” you smiled but kept your eyes cast down, “forget what i asked i just...wanted to see what you’d say haha,” you tried to play it off as a joke, “i got you!”

he stared at you silently for a few seconds, clearly contemplating whether or not he believed you, but in the end, he let it go.

you never brought up that night ever again, but you thought about it constantly. it haunted you, in a way. of course the one time you’re finally able to speak up about your feelings, it backfired.

you were in a very upsetting and self deprecating headspace for a while, wondering if this was your sign to never make the first move, if you were the problem. it took you a little while to snap out of it, but once you did, you realized your worth and stopped looking at the world through a grey lens––you felt like you’d bloomed as a person.

things didn’t go very far with osamu and his neighbor, but you didn’t take that as an opportunity to try again with him, you didn’t want to wait around for him, even though you thought about it for a second at first––you learned to respect yourself more.

meanwhile, your best friend was beside himself, going through the process of reflection and realization. it’s not that he was desperate after a failed relationship, it’s more so that he suddenly realized he had someone perfect right by him all these years––it only made sense. but he was too stupid to realize that, to realize that he cared about you as more than a friend. he had foolishly mistaken his feelings for you as caring for a friend––you two had been inseparable since you were kids, he couldn’t even notice when his feelings shifted from caring for a friend to loving his best friend.

he decided to talk to you about it, it’d only been a few months since you’d joked? about going on a date with him, but part of him felt confident that you might have meant it for real. he was sure you’d be open to it still. he called you during his break at work and found himself smiling as soon as he heard your voice.

“hey samu what’s up?”

he started to answer, but he trailed off when he heard you laughing at an unfamiliar voice in the background. “hey...just wanted to talk. what are you uh up to?”

he heard you shush whoever was with you. “nothing much.” he heard you sit down.” i can’t stay for long but what did you want to talk about? i’m all ears.”

he was going to brush it off, maybe it was just a friend, but when he heard a faint ‘babe’ and what sounded like a small kiss on the other end, that was all he needed to confirm his suspicions. “yeah i just...i’ll actually call you back later, okay?”

you paused on the other end, most likely confused, but you let him go nonetheless.

osamu sat there in his office at the back of his restaurant, surrounded by silence, complete disbelief and an indescribable ache running through his body. was he really too late?

#haikyuu #haikyuu angst #haikyuu blurbs #haikyuu drabbles #kuroo #kuroo x reader #kuroo angst #kuroo blurb #kuroo drabble #iwaizumi #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi blurb #iwaizumi angst #iwaizumi drabble #osamu #osamu x reader #osamu angst #osamu blurb #osamu drabble

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obxjj · 3 years ago

Text

the way we heal | jj maybank

- pairings: jj maybank x reader

- summary: people deal with trauma in different ways but it seems that jj thinks you don't care about the loss of your friends and deep down himself but he just needs to understand that people heal in their own time and through their own meanings, he just needed to be reassured of it. kinda pre season 2 ep 1 give ot take

- warning(s): really motherfucking angsty and swearing. mention of substance abuse

- wc: 2.2k :))))

a/n: all my fics the pogues and reader are the age 17/18 only because that's more comfortable for me to write. its been a long long time since i have wrote something so sorry for and spelling errors

People tend to deal with trauma differently. It could be resulting to crying you eyes out until you can’t breath and you can’t see through your tears clouding your eyes. Drinking until your liver wants to shut down and you whole body is so numb that yourself and everyone around you is so tuned out that you can’t function. Resulting to drugs to either feel something or not to feel anything at all. Or to have something to blame your actions on from yourself acting out simply because you don’t know how to handle the situation of a friend dying.

See you on the other hand dealt with it internally or the whim and feeling of not accepting death. Maybe it was your subconscious talking wanting you not to accept or maybe it was the gut feeling that you always got telling you that they were actually alive and have survived that storm that ‘supposedly’ had swept them away because “no body was found”.

This ‘gut feeling’ had always been right in many life or death situations. Or even just you picking out an outfit that you were unsure of whether it was going to get the boys attention that you had a crush on. It did indeed get his attention that night because that’s how you ended up loosing your virginity that night but that’s besides the point.

The best way you could describe it was like when people would do personality tests and it would ask “are you controlled by your heart or what you feel” probably not those exact words but you get the point. I felt with my feelings if my gut said yes then it was a yes.

Since the night that John B and Sarah had ‘died’ your gut had been telling you the opposite. That they were in fact not dead. As Big John use to say when you were a kid, you can never kill a Routledge. At the time it seemed like bullshit but now it was starting to grow on you.

However now your two friends were presumed dead and not everyone dealt with trauma like you did. Some would even go as far to say that you didn’t actually give a fuck that your friends were dead because you hadn’t cried or you hadn’t drunk yourself into a state of no return or resulted to smoking weed every single day and spray painted ‘murder’ on Ward Cameron’s estate. But at least Kiara wasn’t lying.

But the thing was you hadn’t cried because you couldn’t, you quite literally hated crying because it made you feel weak. Even if you tried and you tried your hardest but nothing came. At this point you could go as far as denial. This gut feeling was like getting hit by a semi truck every time a thought came into your head questioning maybe they were dead. Maybe they did get swept away at sea and never to return.

Your gut feeling was simply not letting you mourn the loss of John B and Sarah and now everyone thought you were an emotionless bitch. I mean they were right to a point but not the whole point.

So that brought you to current day driving around the Cut and night playing fucking real life Where’s Wally but its Where’s JJ Maybank because he’s blacked out drunk somewhere and now you’re on a rescue mission. Not like you had done enough of those in the last few weeks.

About an hour ago your phone rang and it was JJ asking you to come pick him up since somehow he had now idea where he had ended up and was too far gone to put together his surroundings. Well that’s what you had assumed he said since you had to decipher his slurred words.

At this point you had driven around the whole island and gone to every hid out spot that he would go smoke at or to just get away from everyday life. You had gone to all but one place. Where you avoiding that particular house because it held so many memories, plus the fact you hadn’t been near the place since shit hit rock bottom. Yes? But it was the highest chance that JJ was sitting on that dock with his legs swinging over it with a beer in hand.

Well you were right. As you walked down the old dock to where JJ was sitting it was if you could feel all the emotions, thoughts and disbelief crawling their way up your skin from the ground you were walking on. But that gut feeling was like a wave of fire, burning it all the way back to the ground.

“I don’t know why I just didn’t look here first. I should have known aye” you half heartedly said trying to keep the conversation light since you didn’t know what state JJ was going to be in. From the huff you got in response told you he wasn’t in the mood to talk.

“How much have you had J?” You asked with concern but still trying to keep you voice light and less reprimanding because you knew he was in a too fragile state for you to be angry.

“Does it even matter how much Iv had. I don’t feel shit anymore” he replied back with his words straight forward and sobered.

“Well have you even given yourself a break for your body to sober up for you to even feel the effects of it? Or have you still been going since yesterday when I saw you? J its not going to do shit if you don’t give it a rest for at least a day or so” you said back trying you best to keep you and your voice as calm as possible. You fucking hated seeing JJ like this, you would never say it to his face but fuck it just reminded you of his dad when he got into states like this. Until the last week you had never seen JJ this bad. But could you blame him.

“You just don’t get it do you” JJ was now facing you and by the tone of his voice you had unintentionally struck a nerve that you were actively avoiding. “Why did you even fucking come if you’re just going to tell me how I should cope. Do you even care that JB has gone? He was our best fucking friend. He was my fucking brother my only family! And he’s fucking gone just like his old man. You haven’t even shed a tear y/n. You’re just acting like nothing had happened. Do you even care!” JJ was now on his feet breathing heavily and his jaw so clenched you’re surprised his teeth haven’t broken

“J, please do not yell at me right now” you asked with your voice shaking trying to hold back something that was bubbling at the surface. Was it anger or was it the water works that desperately needed to be let out.

JJ started to walk back up the dock, showing that he was done with this conversation that he could have avoided if he didn’t ask you in the first place to come pick him up. Deep down he knew that you would be the only one to come and get him, he just wasn’t as good at showing his gratefulness due to the alcohol that was numbing him.

“JJ just wait please, please don’t walk away” You stood back up and starting walking after him quick on the backs of his feet. He halted his tracks and turned around to look at you with a pained look in his face, as you got up close you could see his eyes stained red. Either from crying or the linger of weed still in his system.

“What could you possibly want to say y/n. I really thought you would be the last person not to care about this” JJ was now right up in your face and his voice was holding back trying his best not to yell. But that last sentence had taken you back.

“You think I don’t care JJ!” now you starting yelling “of course I give a shit JJ our friends are gone, they are not fucking here. I know it might not seem that I don’t care. But just because I’m not crying my eyes out every hour or drinking myself into a state where I don’t now where the fuck I am or getting high that I spray paint on any wall I see” your breath was now battling to come to the surface because you were talking so fast.

“Just because Im not doing any of those things doesn’t mean I don’t care JJ! People deal with this shit differently and you need to understand that” you breathed out trying to grasp for air again “the thing is JJ I have this annoying gut feeling thats telling me that John B and Sarah are not dead, and its literally preventing me to mourn them. I have convinced myself that they are alive and I can’t fucking mourn non dead people J. I don’t know how to fucking explain it”

“Well why didn’t you just tell us that” he replied after bit letting your whole rant sink into his brain, weaving its way through the alcohol that was clouding it.

“Because JJ! Even saying that out loud I sound fucking crazy, like I’m in a deep pit of denial. The thing is I’m far from denial. Yes I know there is a massive fucking fat chance that they are dead and have been food for the sharks” you exclaimed

“Don’t make it worse y/n” JJ shook his head not very happy with your choice of words

“Okay yeah sorry bad wording. Im sorry” you lowered your head in sorrow wanting to slap yourself in the face for trying to make jokes out of trauma.

“So its not that I don’t care J, trust me I do care. But John B and Sarah are not physically here with us and I cant physically care for them right now. But when we see them can do that”

“Y/n -“ JJ tried to get a word in but you hadn’t finished

“Don’t JJ. We will see them again” you put an emphasis on ‘will’ “I trust my gut and even you know that when I get a gut feeling that it’s always been right. Correct?”

“Yes but -“ he tried to get another word in but you needed him to listen.

“JJ I care about you. I care about Kiara and Pope. You guys are physically here for me to care for. The thing is I haven’t spoken to Kie since she’s with Pope half the time and I have spoken to Pope since he’s with Kid half the time and you? I can’t speak to you because your too far gone in beers to for me to even get a coherent conversation in” This was such an over due conversation to be had, you were now on the verge of hyperventilating. You needed JJ to hear this. Fully sober would have been better but half sober is the best you’re gonna get.

“JJ I understand if that’s how you’re going to deal with all of this but you can’t throw yourself completely away. We need you. I need you JJ. I can’t have you going off the deep end and then we loose you too. You need to be here for when we get John B back. He will need you for when he’s back”. The water works that you had been holding back had finally been released and trust it to be in front of JJ. He was your fucking rock, you couldn’t loose him. No way that would be your last day on earth if that were to happen.

“I-. Im sorry. I’m just so fucking lost y/n. I don’t know what the fuck to do. You’re always at work and Kie and Pope are god knows where. I just want this to go away so fucking bad. All this pain, I feel like I have no one” JJ was now crying to and gripping your waist as is you could float away into the air

“I know JJ, but you have us you have always had us. But you have to be so stubborn sometimes that you won’t let us in and help, you won’t let me in a help you” you had JJ’s face in your hands making him look at you so he knew you meant every single word. “I’m so sorry if you didn’t think I cared and I wasn’t there to help you, I just deal with this shit in a different way. Just like every single other person. We all heal differently and that’s okay. It dosent mean we care less. It doesn’t mean I care less”

Now there you and JJ stand on the dock leading off the chateau both in each others embrace purging the pain that’s both been locked up inside you for so long. The past you and JJ had people really didn’t tend to understand but neither did you. But you would always find your way back to each other at the end of the day. Despite the fights you had in the past and the days you would be at each others throats screaming at each other to the days you would be secretly stealing a glance at him because you just couldn’t help yourself.

You would always be there to help him take the pain away and he was always be there to do the same for you.

#jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank #outerbanks #outerbanks fanfic #obx #outerbanks season 2 #jj maybank imagine

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snwusberry · 2 years ago

Text

just say no next time

[ kaya ]

i'm outside....WTF DOES HE MEAN BY THAT?

i go and check by the window and see him standing there with his hands in his pockets. what is he doing here?

"what's up?" i turn around to sunoo who's, for some reason, always here.

"he's outside. beomgyu is standing outside." i let out in a panicked voice and sunoo just raises an eyebrow. "WHAT DO I DO?"

"i'd say be more discreet." what is he even saying? "look outside."

i turn my head and see beomgyu staring right back at me. then i realized i opened the curtain so widely that i was in full view of whoever was peering in from outside.

"what should i do?"

"i don't know, maybe talk to him??" yeah that does seem like a good idea, doesn't it?

i walk to unlock the front door but sunoo stops me.

"its cold as shit outside, don't you wanna try and not get hypothermia?" his question makes me feel stupid.

he hands me a jacket and as i'm about to open the door for the second time sunoo stops me again. with a smile and an annoying wink he opens the door and walks out but not before screaming "kaya loves you" straight to boemgyu.

is there a hole i can crawl into? maybe a ditch. a trip to space would be nice right about now.

"hi"

i scream and throw the closest thing i can find at the intruder... a shoe.

"ouch, is that how you welcome guests?" he asks, rubbing his forehead.

"oh im so sorry uhhh...what are you doing here?"

"i did say that im outside"

"you did?"

"kaya, you read my message"

stupid, are you that dumb? couldnt you think of something smarter to say? i smile at him... why is he so good looking?

"are you gonna let me in or let me die of hypothermia?"

hypothermia this, hypothermia that...

it takes me a moment to figure out what he said. can you blame me? have you seen the man. he could be a model. but i digress.

"uhmmm, sorry! come in. im sorry!"

i immediately pushed him towards the sofa. sitting beside him i stare at hin waiting for him to say something. im too nervous to start anything.

"kaya listen-"

"do you want tea?" i cut him off because im having an internal panic attack

"kaya, i dont want tea. i want to talk." now why would he say that? that sentence really isnt helping me right now

"about what?" mmmh premature dementia.

"what you said that night at taehyun's place."

"what night" i mumbled to myself hoping he wouldn't hear but because luck is always on my side, he did. HOW FUCKING CLICHÉ.

"please stop acting clueless. you know exactly what im talking about. its why youve been avoiding me for two weeks"

he looks tired and annoyed....kinda hot but anyway

"avoiding? nah i wasn't avoi- how about juice, would you like some juice ive got uhh cranberry." i ramble but i look at me and he has an unamused look. okay just say no next time. "im sorry."

he furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "why are you apologizing?"

"youre probably here to give me the 'i don't think im the one for you' or whatever they say. " i whispered, scared.

"wha- no, kaya thats not why im here. i want to tell you that i feel the same way but you were too busy running away from me to hear me out."

"i wasnt running...i was fiercely avoiding you." what am i even saying?

"if fiercely avoiding me implies that you trip over everyone and everything then yeah, i guess you could say that."

"so-" he gave me a look and i immediately shut my mouth.

"kaya, please stop running. i had been creating these fake scenarios of you and i since i realized my feelings for you. i never once had the courage to even approach you. i had soobin order for me because i was scared i'd say something stupid. when taehyun got you and i to audition for a duet i was so excited when i found out it was you he wanted me to perform with. we started hanging out more and i felt so content because i was finally hanging out with the girl that's been occupying my mind. then that night at taehyun's apartment when you let it slip that you like me i was so shocked that you actually reciprocated my feelings and i was gonna talk to you but tgen you ran out and started avoiding me. it stung" im actually gonna break into tears. i didn't mean to leave him hanging like that.

"im so sorry. it's just. i've liked you when i saw that you became a regular at house fairy. when i ran off that night, i guess i was scared of rejection so i did what i do best. im so sorry for avoiding you. i should have just had courage and talk to you." i looked away from him.

"kaya-"

i look at him and there was a moment of silence before i decided to break it.

"be my boyfriend" i whispered

"what?"

"be my boyfriend or whatever." i whispered again.

"youre gonna have to speak louder than that. i do not have supersonic hearing"

"BE MY BOYFRIEND DAMNIT!"

the widest smile spreads on his face. oh wow then.

---

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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years ago

Text

Simple Addition

Pairing: Shy!Peter Parker x Reader

Request by @satanswitchings : reader asks a very shy Peter to help her with her math homework. They become close, but Peters feelings get hurt when reader won’t admit they’re friends in school

Masterlist

“Hey, wait up.”

Peter stopped in his tracks when he heard your voice from behind him in the hallway. He turned around slowly just as you caught up to him. You gave him your million dollar smile and ran your fingers through your hair, knowing exactly what you were doing.

“It’s Peter, right?” You asked, but you knew the answer. He’d sat in front of you in math half the year and though he never raised his Ahmed or participated in class, he aced every test. The same, however, could not be said for you.

Peter gulped and nodded rapidly, not trusting his voice enough to speak.

“Cool.” You smiled. “So, I have no idea what we just learned. I paid attention and took notes but it still doesn’t make sense to me. I um, I saw you got a 100 on the test. Are you good at math?”

It took Peter a minute to process what you had even said. He was focusing so hard on listening that he didn’t listen at all. He blinked a few times and forced himself to nod, internally kicking himself for being too shy to speak.

“Well, I’m not. Like, at all.” You sighed and shifted your books in your arms. Peter’s eyes clocked the math test on top of your notebook with a failing grade. “I was wondering if you could help me out with the homework? Logarithms for right over my head.”

Peter made sure to listen this time and wordlessly took off his backpack. He went into his red math folder, because math is red, and handing you his completed homework. Your eyes widened in surprise at how easy it was to get it as you looked over the sheet.

“Oh, thanks. I’ll see you-“ You looked up to thank him but he was already gone.

“-later. What a little weirdo.” You chuckled to yourself and put his homework in your folder.

“Who was that?” Your friend Gwen came up to you to ask as she squinted her eyes in Peters direction.

“I don’t know. Some boy in my math class.” You lied. “He gave me his homework though.”

“Nice. I love getting nerds to help me.” She nudged you teasingly with her elbow.

“You’re such a bitch. I love it.” You teased her back as you walked to your next class.

You were walking by the library the next morning when you spotted Peter inside, sitting alone at a table. You went in and took the seat across from him, chuckling a little as he slowly looked up at you in disbelief. A blush spread from the bridge of his nose all the way down his neck as you smiled at him.

“Hey. Thanks for letting me copy it.” You greeted him as you gave him back his math work.

“N-no problem.” He stammered, not looking at you as he put in back in his folder.

“Ahh. So you do speak.” You commented, pleasantly surprised to hear his voice for the first time. He gave you a weak smile and quickly looked away, eyes going back to his Spanish homework. You noticed what he was doing and furrowed your eyebrows. His homework was barely done and it was due later that day. You knew because you were in the same class and breezed through it the night before.

“Is that for Señor Kuhn’s class?” You nodded towards his paper. He looked at you quickly and nodded as he toyed with the cap of his pen.

“You know it’s due today, right?” You asked just to make sure he knew.

“Spanish isn’t my speciality.” He said softly as he brushed some hair out of his eyes.

“Really?” You wondered. “I thought everything was your specialty.”

You knew Peter was a smart kid, some might even call him one of the schools nerds. It surprised you to hear he also struggled with schoolwork.

“I, um, can’t really figure things out without an equation.” He was barely audible but you still heard him. He was painfully shy, and that made him all the more endearing to you.

“Well, Spanish is kinda like an equation.” You told him. “You add the subject to the verb to get the conjugate. Like, this is your homework and you didn’t do it. No hiciste la tarea. I did do the homework. Hice la tarea. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah.” He smiled a little. “Kinda.”

“Here.” You took out your Spanish homework and handed it to him. “You can copy mine. I owe you one for the math homework.”

“Thanks.” He didn’t look at you as he accepted the paper, but his tone told you he was grateful.

“You can look at me, you know.” You chuckled. “You won’t turn to stone or anything.”

Peter’s face flamed red again as you acknowledged his shyness. As much as he wanted to talk to you, he didn’t know how. The words came to mind but died in his throat, leaving him speechless.

“You don’t talk much, do you?” You asked softly, but not meanly. Peter shook his head as he slowly looked at you, a sheepish look on his face.

“Not really.” He mumbled.

“Thats okay.” You shrugged. Talkings overrated. I’ll, uh, I’ll see you around?”

Peter nodded eagerly at you as you stood up from the chair. You waved at him, and he weakly waved back. As soon as you were out of sight, he banged his head on the desk a few times out of embarrassment. The girl he’s been crushing on since third grade had finally noticed him and he couldn’t hold it together long enough to speak to her. He picked his head up and sighed, eyes flickering over to your Spanish homework. He smiled a little at your unmistakable handwriting before picking up the paper and copying the answers down.

This was the first of my many homework trade offs. He’d give you the math homework and you’d give him the Spanish, an arrangement that benefited the both of you.

“Peter.” You came up to him the following week. “Did you happen to do the math homework last night? I got up to number 7 and my mind shut down. It was totally lost on me.”

Peter silently handed it to you, already having it ready since he knew he’d run into you between classes.

“Thank you so much.” You sighed in relief. “I have the spanish, if you need it.”

“Thanks.” Peter mumbled as he took the Spanish from you. “Bye.”

“Bye.” You called after him, but he had already run away.

He came to your locker the next morning with the math homework in his hand, wordlessly holding it out to you.

“Oh my God, thanks.” You took it and slipped it into your folder. “Stay here, I’ll get the Spanish.”

Peter stood there in silence as you began to rummage through your locker. He peered inside, smiling to himself at all the pictures of you and your many friends you had hanging up. Your lives couldn’t be more different, but this single thread tied you together.

“Are you on the Decathlon team?” You asked suddenly as you took out your Spanish folder. Peters face flushed as he nodded, too shy to speak. You got the homework out but didn’t give it to him just yet, knowing he’d run away once you did.

“Is it fun?” You asked. “I almost signed up freshman year until I found out you have to take a bus all the way to Washington DC every year. I get crazy motion sickness.”

“It’s fun. I- I like it.” He stammered, surprised at you making small talk with him. Though you’d never admit it to your friends, you liked Peter. You liked him a lot, in fact. He was far better than the jocks you had pinning after you. You appreciated his help with homework, but you wanted more from him. Despite his obvious shyness, you were determined to get a conversation out of him.

“That’s cool. Do you do any other clubs?” You kept the conversation going just to keep him there.

“Marching band and robotics.” He told you, speaking a little louder now.

“Wow. So you’re like a total nerd, huh?” You joked as you shut your locker. Peter opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. His ears turned pink as he struggled to talk to you.

“Relax. I’m just teasing.” You assured him as you squeezed his arm. “I think robotics are cool. Have you built one yet?”

“I’ve built a few.” He nodded. “It’s probably not the kind of robots you’re thinking of, though. It’s mostly machines that can complete basic tasks.”

“That’s the most I’ve ever heard you speak at once.” You smiled happily. “Here’s the Spanish.”

“Thank you.” He mumbled through a smile as he took it. “Uh, I’ll see you later. Bye.”

And with that, Peter bolted away without another word. You laughed to yourself at his odd behavior before one of your friends came up to you.

“Hey girl.” She greeted. “Who was that?”

“No one.” You lied again, wondering briefly why you even did it. “Let’s go to homeroom.”

In a slight change of events, Peter was the one to approach you the following week. He spotted you in the library and had every intention of minding his own business when he realized you were crying. He couldn’t be totally sure because you had your hands over your face, but your body language told him you were very upset. He took a deep breath and smacked himself on the cheek before walking up to your table.

“Hey.” He said softly, startling you a little as you looked up. You quickly wiped your face free of tears and gave a weak smile, gesturing for him to sit down.

“Hi.” You nodded, averting your eyes so he couldn’t tell how glassy they were.

“You okay?” He asked as he slid a packet of tissues towards you. You laughed sadly as you accepted the packet, quickly taking one out to dry your eyes.

“This is so embarrassing.” You sniffled. “I cannot understand this math for the life of me. You know I got a 67 on the last test? I’m gonna fail this class.”

“You won’t fail.” Peter assured you. “You just need to practice.”

“I try to but I get frustrated when I can’t understand the problem and then I stop. How is it so easy for you?” You asked desperately.

“The same way Spanish is easy for you.” He said. “Different people have different skills.”

“But math is a basic skill that we learned when we were five. The teacher told me if I fail one more test, I’m gonna go to summer school. I’m so stupid.” Yoh began to cry again, turning your face so he wouldn’t see. Peter felt a strong urge to walk away due to his inter hatred of awkward situations, but he felt a stronger urge to comfort you. He got out of his seat and took the one beside you instead, placing a gentle hand over yours. You turned your head sharply in his direction at the unexpected contact, eyes flickering from your hands to his face.

“You’re not stupid.” He said at the loudest you ever heard him.

“Then why can’t I get this?” You whispered.

“Um, I…I don’t…” Peter struggled to find the words to say to make you feel better. He frowned and shook his head, cursing himself for being shy.

“It’s okay, Peter.” You said suddenly. “I shouldn’t even be talking to you about this. I’m sure you have your own things to deal with, you don’t need me to burden you with mine.”

“You’re not being a burden.” He found the words this time. “Doing the homework is what helps me remember how to solve the equations. Since you’re just copying my work, you’re not getting the extra practice.”

“You’re probably right. Actually, I bet you’re exactly right.” You sighed as you looked down at the math you’d been trying to figure out for the last hour. You chewed your bottom lip as you through about what he said and came up with a solution.

“Could I get your number?” You asked him. “Maybe it’ll help me if you explain the homework to me instead of just giving me the answers.”

“Oh, sure.” Peter gulped nervously as he took out his phone, handing it to you with shaking hands. You typed your number into it, smirking at his Lock Screen, a picture of him and Mr. Stark.

“Cute background.” You mumbled as you handed his phone back. “You can put your number into mine as well. I have a feeling you’re not one for texting first.”

“That’s, um, that’s true.” He laughed shyly as he put his number in your phone. “You may be struggling with math, but you’re excellent at reading people.”

“I do my best.” You shrugged. “I’ll talk to you later, Peter.”

Just as you promised, a text from you appeared on Peters screen later that evening.

“Hey Peter. It’s Y/n.”

Peter gulped nervously and picked up his phone, thumbs dancing over his keyboard as he thought of a response.

“Hi. Need help with math?” He texted back.

“Eager to get started I see. We could talk first, you know.” You teased him, hoping he would get your sarcasm through the text.

“About what?” He asked, having literally no idea what a girl like you would possibly want to talk about with a boy like him.

“Idk. Our days, the weather, the fictional character from our childhood that we projected on. Whatever you want to talk about.” You sent, making him laugh.

“I have nothing to say.” He wrote back. He knew it sounded lame, but he was being honest.

“Then I’ll start. What’s your favorite fruit?” You texted. The random quetsion made him chuckled as he rolled over and hugged his pillow.

“Strawberries.” He answered back.

“This is the part where you ask me what my favorite fruit is. That’s how a conversation works.” You wrote, poking fun at him once again.

“I’m not good at conversations.” He reminded you, a cheeky smile on his face.

“So I see. Come on, Peter. Let me pick that pretty little brain of yours.”

Peter rubbed his face as he grinned, blushing over you once again.

“I already told you I like strawberries. Idk what else I can say. That’s basically my whole personality right there.” He texted you, letting a little bit of his personally shine through.

“Hark! 😳Is that a sense of humor? You’re three dimensional after all” You wrote back.

“I have a glimmer of a personality every now and then” He laughed as his own joke as he texted you.

“I’m shocked. I thought you were just the token cute but shy background character that gets his arc in the third season” You sent. Peter let out a shaky breath when he read that you called him cute. If he didn’t know any better, he’d think you were flirting.

“Oh I’m much more. I only think about the way I said “here” during attendance for HALF the day now. Used to be much longer 😏”

You laughed out loud when you read his text, loving that he was finally showing you his personality.

“Say less 🙈😍” You texted back.

“Sometimes I hold eye contact when I’m really feeling wild” He wrote you.

“BABY stop you’re turning me on”

“One time I coughed in class instead of holding it in even though I already coughed a few minutes before” Peter was feeling much more comfortable with you now, your reaction to his texts giving him the confidence to go on.

“You’re such a bad boy 🥵 Do you ever ask to go to the bathroom during class?”

“Never 😉” He sent, making you giggle.

“That’s so hot 🥴” You texted him, imagining the blush it would put on his face.

“I’m glad you think so. I’m just a little 👉👈”

You sat up in bed and laughed loudly, falling in love with him with every text. It’s always the people you don’t expect who make you smile the most.

“BAHHAA I cannot believe you. You should talk more!! You’re actually really funny” You texted him, hoping he would listen. If he had been this open in school, you would’ve noticed him years ago.

“You mean I’m not just a pretty face? 😔🥺” He stole your joke from before. It was a minute before you answered, his heart pounding as he waited.

“You’re that too” You finally said, making him smile.

“Don’t get used to this.” He told you. “It’s a lot easier to talk over text. It may be months before I make eye contact with you”

“Well lucky for you I’m a patient person”

“Are you ready to do the math now?” He asked, feeling his social better beginning to drain.

“Yes I’ve gotten my Peter fill. Can we FaceTime?” You asked and his heart skipped a beat. Not knowing what to say, he turned to humor.

“Sure but I’ll only show my ceiling and barely speak 🥰” He wrote. You let out a breathy laugh and shook your head at his antics.

“That’s okay.” You sent. “I’m calling you now”

Peter sat up in bed and swiped his hands through his hair to tame it before your contact lit up on his screen. He took a deep breath before clicking the answer button.

“Hey. What are you doing?” Your smile appeared on his screen. Your phone was propped up against something as you sat at your desk, homework all out in front of you. A smile tugged at Peter’s lips as he saw a glimpse into your room, and you think thinking the exact same thing. Your walls were full of pictures of friends and his were full of decathlon posters. They were different, but different was okay.

“I’m just laying in bed.” Peter told you. Only his eyes could be seen from his camera and as promised, you were looking at his ceiling.

“Aw. Without me?” You teased and shot him a wink. Peter’s face flamed red before he disappeared from your screen all together. You let out a laugh at the surprised squeak he made as he struggled to find words to say.

“Wait, come back.” You chuckled. “It’s so fun to flirt with you because of how red you get but I genuinely fear you’re gonna have a heart attack. Does your family have a history of heart problems?”

“No.” He answered your joke question seriously.

“Okay.” You nodded in satisfaction. “Then you looked really cute today.”

Peter’s face left the screen again but you heard him let out a flustered laugh, which made you laugh as well.

“Let me see your face.” You whined as you leaned your cheek on your hand.

“No.” Peter laughed. “Open your textbook to page 56. There’s a good practice test I want you to do.”

“Okay, I see it.” You found the page and looked over the question. “How do you do number one?”

Your face timing sessions became a nightly routine as you tutored each other in your respective subjects. Peter eventually worked up the courage to ask you to come over to study for midterms, which you gladly accepted. Even after you got an 81 on the midterm, you continued to go to his house twice a week for studying. Two months later, he had become one of your best friends, even if he was still a little shy around you.

“I think of it as BAE.” Peter explained, lying on his stomach beside you on his bed. “Base, answer, exponent. Do you want to try this one?”

“Okay.” You nodded and took the pencil from him. “The base is 2. The answer is 8. And the exponent is 3?”

“That’s right.” Peter smiled but didn’t look at you. “You got it.”

“Finally.” You sighed in relief. “Do you think I’ll be ready for the test on Friday?”

“I think so.” He nodded as he wrote down another problem.

“I think so?” I need to hear your confidence, Peter.” You urged as you nudged him with your elbow.

“Fine.” He spoke up. “You’re going to ace this test, I know it. You are going to ace this test because you are smart and capable and I’m so proud of you.”

A shocked smile lit up your face at Peter’s words of encouragement.

“Wow. That was almost a normal volume. I’m impressed.” You remarked.

“Shut up.” He mumbled through a laugh as he went back to his equation.

“Sorry. I’m just teasing.” You assured him. “You can speak at whatever volume you want.”

Peter looked up from his notebook and smiled softly at you, holding your gaze for a moment before returning to his work.

“Hey.” You smiled in realization.

“What?” He wondered.

“You looked at me.”

“I always look at you.”

“Yeah, but you held eye contact with me.” You gushed. “You don’t normally do that.”

“I guess I’m getting more comfortable around you.” He shrugged bashfully as he averted his eyes. You knew he was getting overwhelmed, so you didn’t push the subject. It still meant the world to you, though, as he was finally coming out of his shell.

“Good.” You mumbled. “Good, I’m glad.”

Peter looked at you again with a shy smile, and you looked back. As you stared at each other, you saw his eyes drop to your lips before returning to your eyes. You picked up his signal and leaned in a little, but he quickly looked down and away. You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and cleared your throat to hide your disappointment from him.

“Um, so do you want to start Spanish?” You suggested, not wanting to spend another minute in that moment.

“Y-yeah.” He stammered. “Let’s start Spanish.”

You walked into school the next day with a heavy heart after Peter rejected you. Being in the popular crowd, you were usually the one doing the rejecting. You had always assumed Peter wasn’t making the first move because he was shy, but now you knew it was because he didn’t feel the same. Your friends were already waiting for you at your locker, so you painted on a smile and let it go.

Peter spotted you at your locker and could immediately tell something was off. He knew you well enough to know when your smile was forced and he was a sneaking suspicion that he was the reason why. He hadn’t meant to dodge your kiss the night before. He wasn’t even entirely sure you were leaning in for one, which is why he short circuited and pulled away. He’d been beating himself up over it but had an idea of how to make it right. You were always encouraging him to be bolder in school, and he couldn’t think of anything bolder than walking up to you while you were with the popular kids. Before he could lose his nerve, he walked up to you and cleared his throat.

“Hi, Y/n.” He said a little louder than he was used to, surprising the both of you.

“Uh, hi Peter.” You looked at him briefly and quickly looked back at your friends. You couldn’t hear what they were saying anymore because of the range of emotions you were going through. You were frankly a little pissed at Peter for pulling away from the kiss, but you were also proud of him for having the courage to come up to you at school. That pride was currently being overshadowed by embarrassment as your friends gave you strange looks for talking to him. On any other day, you would’ve been happy to talk to him in public. But him pulling away from your kiss and then talking to you was sending you mixed signals that frustrated you to the point where you didn’t even want to speak to him.

“Um, do you think we could meet an hour later that usual today?” He asked sheepishly. “I have a feeling band practice is gonna run late.”

Your friends looked at you in amusement and one of them made kissy faces in your direction. Your face heated up in embarrassment and you decided you needed to get rid of Peter as quickly as possible.

“Sure. Whatever, that’s fine.” You said quickly, hoping he’d get the message and leave.

“Did have any trouble with the practice problems I gave you?” He asked and your jaw almost dropped. Your friends raised their eyebrows at you, looking for answers you didn’t want to give them.

“No.” You stated bitterly.

“Practice problems?” Gwen snickered and looked at you questioningly.

“It’s nothing.” You assured her before looking at Peter. “Is there something else you needed?”

“No.” He said, shocked by your bitter tone. “I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah.” You nodded vaguely and turned back to your conversation. Peter took that as his cue to leave and began to wonder if the way he was feeling was how he had made you feel the night before. If it was, he understood why you didn’t want to talk to him.

“What was that?” Your friend laughed tauntingly, making the rest of the group laugh as well.

“Nothing.” You dismissed quickly. “Let’s just go to class.”

Peter was already waiting for you in your room when you got home, the sight of him making you let out an angry huff.

“What was that?” You demanded with your hands on your hips.

“What?” Peter asked curiously as he looked up from him his notebook.

“This morning. You totally embarrassed me in front of my friends.” You whined.

“How did I embarrass you? All I did was talk to you.” He pointed out, hurt evident in his voice.

“Yes, and that’s how you embarrassed me.” You stated. “They don’t need to know that you and I are hanging out all the time and they certainly didn’t need to know that you’re giving me practice problems. Now they’re gonna think I’m stupid.”

“You’re not stupid for needing help.” He said quietly.

“But they don’t get that. I never wanted them to know about this, or us, or any of it.” You explained. “What you and I do in private is between us. You can’t just come up to me and act like…”

“Like we’re friends?” He finished your sentence as he stood up from your bed. Your face fell when you realized how bad it sounded. The hurt look on your best friends face, a look you put there, made your anger evaporate. You realized almost immediately that you were in the wrong and shouldn’t be scolding him.

“Peter, please don’t do this. You know I care about you. Love you, even.” You walked to him and put your hands on his shoulders. “You’re my best friend within these four walls. But when we’re at school, people expect me to be friends with girls like Gwen and boys like Flash. People like you and me don’t really hang out, you know?”

“And I expect you to be kind.” He snapped as he pushed your hands off. “Should I not do that? Are you not capable of that?”

“Why are you yelling at me?” You stepped back from him, knowing he was getting overwhelmed. “I’ve never heard you raise your voice above a mumble.”

“I’m yelling because I’m hurt.” He yelled, voice cracking at the end. “Are we even friends? Do you regard me as that much or am I just a tutor to you?”

“What are you talking about? Of course we’re friends.” You reached for him again but he pulled away.

“Well you’re being a bad one.” Peter shot back. Your face twisted in pain as he stared at you, both of your chests heaving. Peter tore his eyes away from you and went into his backpack, quickly getting out his math folder.

“Here.” He took your practice test from his folder and held it out to you. “You got them all right.”

You took the test and looked at in in disbelief, momentarily forgetting about the fight. You’d never gotten all of the questions right before. You looked up in time to see Peter leaving with his backpack.

“Where are you going?” You grabbed his arm gently to stop him.

“Home.” He told you. “You don’t need tutoring anymore so I have no reason to stay.”

“We can still hang out. You’re not just my math tutor.” You made a desperate attempt for him to stay as the weight of your actions hit you. Peter laughed darkly before looking up at you, an amused look in his eyes.

“Would you ever admit that outside this room?” He asked.

“I…”

“Then I am just your tutor.” He spat. “Goodbye.

Peter managed to avoid you the next morning, dodging you all together until math class. You knew you had to focus on the test and not your fight, but all you wanted to do was make up with him. Once the tests were over and handed in, you took your shot.

“Hey.” You whispered as you poked him with your pencil. “How do you think you did?”

Peter didn’t turn around, which you partially expected.

“I bet you did really well.” You tried again. “I actually think I did well too, thanks to you.”

Again, silence.

“Peter, please talk to me. I’m sorry about our fight.” You rubbed his shoulder kindly but he still didn’t move.

“You are my friend.” You said a little louder. “You’re my best friend. What can I do to prove that to you?

Peter was tempted to say something to you, but the bell rang before he could. He grabbed his books and hastily got out of his seat before you had a chance to to speak to him again. You grabbed your backpack and ran after him, determined to make this right.

“Excuse me, sorry.” You pushed past people to catch up to Peter. “Hey, Peter!”

When he didn’t answer, you called out again.

“Peter! Wait up.”

Still no answer, and you were starting to get frustrated.

“Hey! I’m talking to you.” You caught up to him and grabbed his hand. He looked at your hands before looking you in the eyes and dropping your hands harshly. You stood there stunned for a moment as he began to walk away until you decided you had enough.

“PETER PARKER.” You screamed, making everyone look at you. Every pair of eyes in the hallway was looking in your direction, but you were only looked at Peter.

Peter, who was about to pass away from the attention, by the way.

He looked around sheepishly as people cranes their necks to see who you were yelling at and felt his face turn redder than it ever had.

“You don’t talk much, and that’s fine.” You continued, loud enough for everyone to hear you. “I just need you to listen.”

Peter blinked a few times before nodded slowly, signaling that he would listen. You smiled in relief before digging in your backpack and pulling out your math test from earlier that day. You held it up over your head and turned in a circle so everyone could see it.

“I got an 92 on my math test last week.” You announced. “That’s the highest I’ve gotten since middle school and I couldn’t have done it without Peter tutoring me. I came to him for help with homework but I ended up with a best friend whom I love very dearly.” You were only looking at him now. “I will admit that behind closed doors and I will admit that here. But I also have to admit that I have not been a good friend and for that I am truly sorry.”

Peter smiled a little as the shocked looks of the crowd faded to nothing when he looked at you.

“You don’t have to do this here.” He whispered, but you weren’t finished yet.

“I haven’t even done it yet.” You half smiled as you shoved your test into your bag.

“Done what?” He asked as you walked up to him. You got to him and gave him an apologetic smile in advance for the attention you were about to draw to him.

“What I’ve been wanting to do for a long time now.” You told him. Peter barely had time to react before you put your hands on his face and pulled him into a kiss. You could feel his body tense up momentarily, so you pulled away just enough to whisper…

“Relax.”

Peter’s body did a better job at listening than he did as he slowly loosened his muscles. A hesitant hand found your waist and rested there as you wrapped your arms around his neck. You could feel the heat of his skin against your face and pulled away before he could get too overwhelmed.

“I.…just…heh…um - wow - uh…” He stumbled over his words as he looked at you with a shy smile.

“Don’t speak.” You laughed and shook your head. “Just kiss me.”

Tag List 🏷

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@maybemona @young-romanoff @alexxcorona113 @fancyxparker @lethal-wisdom @xo-spidey @im-still-tryin-to-find-it @big-galaxy-chaos @pandaxnienke @theincredibledeadlyviper @thestylestour @officialsimppage @mrvelscaptains @peterspideysstuff @reemusluupin @perspectiveparker @itsemohours @satanswitchings @okkulta @amorhollands @parkerlovebot @alwayssandy @sarcasticallywitty15

#peter parker x reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x you #peter parker fluff #shy!peter Parker #shy!peter Parker x reader #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you #spiderman #marvel #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker imagine #iron man

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sugamamacustard · 4 years ago

Text

Let Me Help You (Part. 2)

Pairing: Alpha! Toru Oikawa x Omega! Reader, Alpha! Issei Matsukawa x Omega! Reader, Alpha! Takahiro Hanamaki x Omega! Reader

Genre: Angst, fluff, Hurt/comfort.

Request: Oh boy, here we go!

Anon: hi!! can we get more of the omega depression drabbles/one shots? i would really like to see mattsun’s version and other characters you can think of!! the more angsty the better ;)p.s. luv your writing <3 also stay healthy, safe, and drink water !!

Anon: Can you make part 2 of let me help you please. if not it’s fine with Mattsun and Makki

Anon: Could you do part 2 for the let me help you with makki and mattsun please if not that’s fine this is also my first time requesting something so i’m kinda nervous💕

(Don’t be nervous at all, you did amazing!)

Anon: Mamas, can I order a continuation of let me help you?? Please?? I need some fluff after that hurt 💕💕💕🥺🥺🥺

(Mamas anon! :DDD)

Anon: omg i love the omega depression!! please continue with the rest of the third years or a pt 2 with oikawa’s !! i love your writing!!

@bohica160: Could we possibly get a part 2 with Oikawa please? 👉 👈 🥺

And I think that was all? You guys just really wanted this, and who am I to deny you?

Summary: Because of unseen circumstances, you drop, and you drop hard. How does your alpha help you/redeem himself?

Author’s Note: I kinda wanna post some self-indulgent OC stuff on here, but idk. It’s kinda crack-y and stupid. Also, we love to see a healthy relationship. Like Hanamaki’s and Matsukawa’s are so soft. Also, also, please note Hanamaki’s is heavily based off of my own experience with depression and the events after with my best friend, whom I will love and cherish forever.

Requests: Open!

Part 1: Here!

➵ You drop was actually out of anyone’s control.

➵ Omega drops rely heavily on hormone balances, much like depression, and it seemed like this month just wasn’t your month.

➵It was hard to exactly pin point when it got bad, or when you started experiencing symptoms, as they were slow and not necessarily noticeable.

➵A missed lunch here, a small scent shift there.

➵Small things that neither you nor Takahiro would notice.

➵It was much like a rollercoaster, inching higher and higher until the drop would come.

➵ Honestly, both of you thought you were fine, and since you were around both of your mutual friends (The Seijoh Team) enough no one could really point it out.

➵ It truly was a bad situation all around.

➵ You only really began noticing after a few days of ignoring lunch in a row.

➵ It hit you when you were sitting in the library, stomach clutching with hunger as you scanned through a textbook.

➵ You attempted to get up and go find Takahiro to go get something to eat, but you just...didn’t.

➵ You couldn’t find the energy to stand, much less walk, and just stayed seated

➵ You just couldn’t move.

➵Like a million bags of sand were tied to your hips weighing you to the chair.

➵ You swallowed tightly, rolling your shoulders before stuffing your text book into your bag, trying to breath in through your nose and out through your mouth.

➵Deep breaths. Thats what you needed to focus on right now.

➵ But then you couldn’t. You were hyperventilating, and white-knuckling the edge of the table as your vision turned blurry and watery.

➵ The cramping from your hunger combined with the sudden rush of emotions made you want to vomit.

➵ Before you could, you slung your backpack over your shoulder, bolting out of the library.

___

Laughter and chuckles were heavy as Takahiro gave a hearty chuckle at something Matsukawa said, shaking his head before taking a swig from his energy drink. His eyes darted to his phone every now and again, just checking to make sure you didn’t need him.

You would always come first to him.

When his screen lit up with your beaming face shining up at him, he quickly swiped to accept holding it to his ear, watching while the team laughed at Oikawa, who was shielding himself from Iwaizumi.

“Hiro?”

“Shooting star?” His brows furrowed as he slowly began cleaning his stuff, straightening himself up so he could leave as soon as possible if you needed him; which, guessing by your home, you did.

“I-I think something’s wrong.” You paused, making his heart drop. “I don’t know, but I think I need to go to the doctor, but, I know this is a lot so feel free to say no, can you-”

He didn’t let you finish. “Tell me where you are and I’ll come pick you up and drive you. Do you need me to call and book an appointment?”

A few of his packmates turned with worried eyes, trying to send a non-verbal question. Well, for most of them. Oikawa was trying to whisper-yell his questions, Iwaizumi trying to shut him up.

“I’m at the front of the school. I’ll just meet you at your car.”

“I’ll be right there, shooting star. Stay safe, okay? I love you, and I’ll see you soon Omega.” Takahiro waited for your reciprocation and own farewell before hanging up, quickly standing and swinging his leg over the bench and grabbing his bag.

“Makki-kun, is Y/N-chan okay?!” Oikawa screeched after him, actively crawling onto Iwaizumi, who looked like he was ready to commit first-degree murder.

Makki threw up a thumbs up behind him, waiting till he was out of the cafeteria before sprinting towards the parking lot.

He hoped, with every inch of his body, he didn’t lie to his captain.

___

“Take your pills.”

“Alpha, they taste horrid-”

“I don’t care, they make you feel better.”

Takahiro watched you carefully, handing you two of the teal and white pills. The alpha was strict on very few things with you, but your health he did not fuck with.

The appointment with your doctor went fine, with minimal blood work done, and you were sent off with a prescription for hormone balancing pills. You and Takahiro (Who was absolutely divine during the entire thing) were explained how the pills worked and why you dropped, all of which was simple enough to understand. Since then, Takahiro was insistent on you taking the pills in front of him.

“Open.” Takahiro demanded, watching as you stuck your tongue out. He moved your head by your chin, checking the very corners of your mouth. “Lift your tongue.”

You did so, showing nothing. He hummed in approval, letting go of your chin before pausing, pulling you close so you could hear his heartbeat.

“Thank you for caring, Hiro.” You whispered, wrapping your arms around his neck and nuzzling into your alpha’s neck, taking in his scent.

“Thank you for telling me about this and letting me help you.” He responded, pressing a sweet peck to your temple and reminding himself you were still here in his arms. And would be with him for a long, long time.

➵ Your drop was a mix between miscommunication and little whispers in your ear.

➵ Honestly, there was a reason you were in a pack with minimal other omegas.

➵ They grew catty and mean and vindictive if there was something they didn’t like.

➵It was one of their many flaws and strengths.

➵You yourself had caught yourself bad-mouthing another omega to your alpha every now and again.

➵ Though you hated doing it, at some point it was just second nature.

➵ You and Issei had good communication though, and very rarely did something as silly as jealousy come between you two.

➵ whenever something was bothering you or your alpha you would talk it out.

➵ You both trusted each other completely.

➵ If something felt off about another person, you were quick to mention it to the other.

➵ However, sometimes things got complicated.

➵ Insecurities seeped through your walls that Issei kept strong for you.

➵And sometimes, small little whispers became hurdles and boulders pounding against your defenses and breaking them down.

➵Leaving you open and stumbling.

➵ And sometimes, because of this you forgot that you had back-up, an artillery that would fight for you at the drop of a hat.

➵ And those moments, that ones were you were caught with your tail between your legs and ass in the air waiting to be fucked over, were when you truly crumbled.

➵And though it broke you down and made you hurt, your artillery had your back.

___

“Issei, I was-”

You bit your tongue as you were roughly shoved to the side by Akina Harakashi, the omega throwing herself at your alpha. His face remained unmoved and his arms by his side.

She was his science partner for the semester, and though Issei reassured you she was nothing more, you couldn’t help but internally whine at how she acted with him. It was no secret that she liked him, but since you and Issei kept you relationship on the down low, rumors were bound to pop up.

And though you didn’t let it show, they poked and prodded at you. Make your skin crawl as you ventured deep into your own mindset. Thoughts that would plague your every move and drive your omega into overdrive as they tried fixing whatever you picked on in your own reflection.

You shivered as she looked up to Matsukawa, who was busy focusing on entering his locker combo.

“Mattsunnnn~ I’ve missed you!” Her voice was literal nails on a chalkboard to you.

“I saw you twenty minutes ago.” Matsukawa hissed as his locker popped open. “I haven’t seen you recently though, pretty thing.”

Your omega purred as Issei grabbed his textbook, closing his locker and pushing past Akina. He smirked down at you, intertwining your pinkies in the most discreet way possible before walking you to class.

You glossed over his question when he asked you how lunch went.

___

“Do you think Harakashi and Matsukawa are dating?”

“It wouldn’t surprise me, have you seen how she hangs off of him?”

“I think they’d make such a cute couple!”

“If Matsukawa doesn’t ask her out soon, he’ll loose her.”

You kept your head down and scent blocking collar tight as you slowly crept through the hallway, exit in front of you. Honestly, you didn’t have the energy to continue on with the day, so you were leaving it the midst of lunch, where you could loose yourself in the crowd and disappear.

You wanted nothing more than your alpha, but his last message had your eyes stinging.

‘Harakashi asked me to meet her at lunch, so I won’t be able to see you. Eat something. At this point, I’ll even take junk food. Just get some food. I’ll see you after school.’

It shouldn’t hurt as much as it did, but it stung you deeply. This was it. This was the downfall of your and your alpha’s relationship. You were blown off for Akina Harakashi at long last.

The rational part of you wanted to defend Matsukawa, but every time you tried, the insecurities that had been bubbling within you spit towards the rational part of you and your omega, throwing any redeeming thought into the corner to rot.

A part of you was angry. Angry with Matsukawa for letting this happen. Angry with yourself for not speaking up. Angry with your fucking stomach which groaned for food of any sort. Livid with Akina for trying to steal Mattsun.

Angry at the world.

You couldn’t really remember the last time you ate anything besides...air. The days all blurred together in one miserable run.

“What did I say?”

You glanced over at Matsukawa, heart leaping at the jump he gave you appearing out of nowhere, leaning on the wall beside you. You huffed, turning away from him and leaving him to follow after you. He did so, jogging a bit to catch up.

“You said I’d see you after school. This is not after school.” You snapped, growling at the alpha. He raised a brow, either in disbelief at your attitude or amusement.

“Omega. I said eat. This doesn’t look like eating.” His longer legs gave him the chance to cut in front of you, face now set in anger.

“You also said you had to meet with Harakashi. So scurry along to your new play thing.” You shoved past Matsukawa, trying to ignore the stinging in your eyes.

“What are you talking about?!” Issei smartened up, grabbing your wrist when you tried leaving him behind yet again, now visibly irritated. Truth be told, he was meeting up with Harakashi to put an end to her insistent clinginess. To put her in her place, beneath you.

She tried confessing to him before he even looked up, coming into the room with her arms outstretched already, yelling about ‘I knew you felt the same’ or something . He dodged her, sneering down at her and snapping at her to leave him alone or he’d go through the semester alone (Which he already talked to the teacher about, but she didn’t need to know about that).

Hanamaki had been his eyes when he wasn’t there, reporting back to Matsukawa with updates on you. His latest? You had been missing from lunch for the better part of the week, and last he saw you were ditching the last half of this day.

Which Matsukawa wasn’t letting happen, because if you went home right now, you wouldn’t come back. And he couldn’t live with himself if he let you drop.

“I was meeting with Harakashi to tell her to piss off. You’re my omega. Why in the hell would I even want someone like her when I already have you? You are mine, and I fought for you. I don’t need a corner worker.”

Any fight you had in you disappeared when you saw the small tears glazing your alphas eyes, making your own break free as you ran into his chest. His arms locked around you, holding as if you would slip away if his grip loosened.

Which you just might’ve. Good thing he wasn’t planning on letting you slip.

“Wanna go get food?”

“...Yea. Can we get nuggets?”

“Anything for my pretty omega.”

➵ Okay this one is super short, and I’m sorry! I just wanted to get this out for you guys!

➵ And I think you guys wanted a follow up of sorts for Oikawa.

➵So here it is!

➵ Things didn’t improve over night.

➵It took awhile, but it was worth it.

➵ In time you and Oikawa reached a nice equilibrium.

➵ He wore his bond mark loud and proud and you made sure to tell him when you were uncomfortable with his fangirls and how close they were getting.

➵ In turn, you learned to slowly let go of any reservations you had on his loyalty.

➵He wouldn’t have marked you if he didn’t want to devote his entire being to you.

➵ This showed up when a girl, who you despised (With no hard feelings, since she hated you just as much) tried confessing to Oikawa.

➵Toru, baby boy, shut her down the minute she opened her mouth.

➵ He didn’t even look her way, instead searching for you and quickly brightening up when he saw you.

➵ If he had a tail it would’ve been wagging.

➵ Things improved and everyone was all the better for it.

➵ And Toru made sure to, not only apologize to Iwaizumi, but gift him a voucher for a free movie for him and his omega (who was having a hard time as well).

➵Things were looking up and you both were sure to keep it that way!

___

“Kentaro, please don’t hurt Kindaichi!” Your pleas fell on deaf ears as you tried to stop the alphas from snapping on each other.

It wasn’t that Kyoutani didn’t like or respect you, because he did-- you were like a second mom, but Kindaichi just got on every single one of his nerves. And then tried dragging you into it! Like, the audacity of this bitch.

“Kyoutani!” Your alpha’s bark had both the blond and raven pausing, a careful glance making both back down as Oikawa heading towards you guys (Throwing a pile of confession letters into the trash on his way by without even looking; some point they would get the hint if he left the blatantly in the open).

The blond growled lowly, sending you a quick glance before returning to practice. Oikawa let him, turning his glare to the instigator of the whole thing. The onion-headed pup hid behind your smaller frame, making your laugh.

It was almost like that moment when dad’s pulled out their ‘behave or else’ voice. And in a way it was.

“One of these days my pretty dove won’t be there to save you, Kindaichi.”

“I know.”

You and Oikawa sent a look to each before you laughed, moving so Oikawa and Kindaichi could have a ‘man to man’ talk.

The pack was dysfunctional, and you almost let it go.

You were thankful you didn’t and still had this family to come back home too. All thanks to your alpha.

“STOP MAKING GOO-GOO EYES AT YOUR OMEGA SHITTY-KAWA.”

“I can’t help it, Iwa- IWA STOP HITTING ME- Y/N HELP-”

You shook your head laughing, jogging to save said alpha.

He was childish and arrogant, and sometimes got too far up his own ass, but he was yours. And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

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osmpalliumduo · 3 years ago

Text

Hello! May I hand u my healer!Tommy au??

-Tommy had passed most of all his life training to be a hero just like his brothers and father, this ones being the owners of one of the biggest agency of heroes in the country

-In his family, everyone manifested their abilities as soon they turned 15

-His father, Phil or known as “Philza”, got this big gorgeous black wings in his back as soon as he hit that age

-His first older brother, Technoblade or “The Blade” presented this inhuman strength and was able to manifest a huge blade in his hands whenever he wanted

-His other older brother Wilbur or known as “Mockingbird”, noticed that he could suddenly use this tone of voice that would force anyone around to copy whatever he said

-Being said that, Tommy was nothing but excited to know what kind of sick ability he would get as soon as he turned 15

-but much to his surprise, nothing happened

-well, not until the next day after his birthday, when Wilbur accidentally tripped and fell down the stairs of their house and somehow despite being this huge hero, hit his head really hard to the point it started bleeding

-Tommy grabbed onto Wilbur’s face gently, trying to calm him down as his father called an ambulance and suddenly, the pain faded away along with the blood

-and Tommy’s eyes looked strangely brighter than before, like shining stones

TOMMY: so.. you are telling me that, I am a healer?

WILBUR, PHIL & TECHNO, nodding enthusiastically:

TOMMY, tearing up: THATS SO FUCKING SHIT!

-Tommy didn’t liked his power, not even one bit, so he trained even harder to make up for the fact of not having a “cool ability”

-he got guns. two silver guns which later Tommy painted red with a graffiti paint can he stole from a guy on the streets

-anyways, he didn’t gave up on his dream of being a hero, actually, he decided to become a vigilante until he got his license

-moving on, Tommy is constantly sneaking into Wilbur’s missions even tho he isn’t allowed in, getting sometimes even kidnapped by the villains themselves as a hostage

-Techno always makes sure to make them regret it deeply to the point that most of the time, if a vandal sees Tommy wandering around, they’ll stay as far away as they can

-Tommy thinks it’s because he is very intimidating, he really isn’t

-Eventually, Wilbur and Techno let Tommy hang around in the hero agency where the “big” heroes talk about plans and shit

-it quickly backfires

WILBUR, grabbing a whiteboard: as I was saying, we should talk about the patrol schedules, as you see here-

Everyone there, chuckling:

WILBUR, looking at the whiteboard, finding a doodle of Tommy with the header “SUCK IT WIL” instead of the schedule: ...

-Tommy always finds a way to get into Wilbur’s or Techno’s nerves, interrupting their meetings, stealing their shit, sometimes even hiding their hero suits

-but he also helps a lot at the station, whenever someone gets badly injured in battle they get send back at the station so Tommy can cure em

-Tommy pretends he finds that job annoying, but he kinda feels great whenever he fixes a broken leg or a very bad burn that could have been problematic

-he also helps a lot with the interns! Also known as the “in-training heroes”

-the in-training heroes are people who are very close to getting their hero license but wish to know how’s the career actually like! So they train with actual heroes and act somewhat like their sidekicks

-And, that’s how Tommy meets Tubbo and Ranboo, two guys who get chosen to be Wilbur’s interns for a couple of months

-at first Tommy messes with them in purpose just to piss them off but he ends up getting attached to the two boys

TOMMY, entering the station: Big man is here!

WILBUR, putting down his paper work: oh hi Tommy! Come here! Give your brother a hu-

TOMMY, walking just past by Wilbur: Tubso! Ranboob! Wanna go get some milkshakes? :D

WILBUR: ...betrayal >:(

-Wilbur gets kinda jealous of them, which ends up on a stupid battle for Tommy’s attention

-Oh! by the way, Tubbo and Ranboo also get attached to Tommy much to their dismay

-why a dismay? They kinda are there to kill Wilbur, Techno and Tommy

-yep! Villain bee duo! They were infiltrated into the station as two interns and aspiring heroes, but they are actually just there to spy on em and kill the three brothers

-the plan backfires, they are kinda attached to Tommy now

TUBBO, in the meeting with all his gangster mates: so, problem here

Everyone: ???

TUBBO, erasing Tommy’s name off the “to-murder” list: we aren’t doing this anymore

RANBOO, nodding while holding onto one of the sweaters Tommy knitted for him: we are attached now

-The group wasn’t very pleased but out of fear of Tubbo and Ranboo, they said nothing, deciding to continue with the murder plan just behind Tubbos and Ranboo’s back

-and that kinda ends up with everyone going for Tommy in the missions, attempting to kidnap him, to shot him, and of course murder him

-so, Tubbo and Ranboo are always behind Tommy in the missions, keeping a close eye on him

-Tommy just thinks they are clingy, like his brothers or dad

Extra stuff:

-Tommys power drains a lot of energy out of him, so he has to constantly eat or drink things with lots of sugar before missions so he doesn’t end up passing out after healing two or three people

-He used to drink lots of coke cans but Phil got very concerned for Tommy’s kidneys so he exchanged that with sweet apples, so Tommy always has to bring a backpack with apples to the missions

-If he abuses his ability too much and doesn’t “regen” with the apples he will end up passing out! Example: (healing 5 persons with no regen = passing out for two hours) (10 = a whole day) (40 = a whole week)

-one time, after a huge attack with bombs, Tommy healed about 70 people in the accident and ended up passing out for almost two weeks straight

-the whole family (and Tubbo & Ranboo) got so scared that they didn’t let Tommy use his ability for at least a month after

-Ranboos ability consists on teleporting and inhuman force (apart from being able to manifest a huge axe into his hands whenever he wants to)

-meanwhile Tubbo’s ability consists on being able to manifest bombs with his hands (tho he likes to call them “nukes”)

#healer tommyinnit au #tommyinnit #wilbur soot #technoblade #philza #tubbo #ranboo #crime boys #bench trio #bee duo #sbi #dreamsmp #dream smp au

356 notes · View notes

heyitsyn · 4 years ago

Text

Manager!Seijoh

a/n: im a seijoh stan and theyre my little plant babies

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

this is so long oml i hate myself

theyre an actual boy band istg

lets be honest, they probably thought you were just another oikawa fangirl

they thought you just wanted to be closer to their captain bc you were another delusional girl who wanted to live out her fantasies

lmao im not trying to be salty

but when you just stared blankly at oikawa tooru after he called you a beautiful flower,

stageplay hinata calling you a mugwort

the team just about threw themselves on your feet

tbh you werent really there to get a boyfriend or for oikawa

you just needed an after school club and the other teams already had managers

the only sport that didnt was the boys volleyball team

imagine why

you were actually a little wary, since you knew of oikawa, being a first year yourself, and you were aware of his psycho fangirls who could probably kill you

but you needed a club that would last you for the next 3 years to graduate

it was kunimi who actually recommended being a manager

you were in his class and you noticed him sleeping in the morning so you gave him your energy bar

‘thanks’

you shrugged and smiled

thats why he tolerated you more than others

you were nice and you were the only one who noticed his tiredness, even the teacher left him alone, and did something about it

sometimes, you even gave him an energy drink

‘can you tell me why youve been so tired lately? i dont think ive seen you wake up until lunch’

he opened the snack and started munching while replying

‘early morning practice for volleyball is still a big adjustment. our captain demands us to be there 6 in the morning sharp and if we’re even a minute late, we’d have to run laps. like for every minute youre late, you have to run those amount’

oh my why is kunimi talking so much

but i love kunimi and first year seijoh boys rights in this household is valid

you furrowed your eyebrows

‘but yall are still growing and you need all your sleep. if i were there, id yell at your captain’

he grinned slightly, imagining your short height beating up their captain

‘meh. you want to be our manager? i saw you looking at the clubs board yesterday and we dont have one so you could take the opportunity and beat him up then’

ofc you agreed bc kunimi was best boi and you just wanted him to have enough sleep for once

after class, he waited for you to finish packing up and when you finished, yall left the classroom

until another guy with a spiky hairstyle joined you and you noticed him as the guy who sometimes came over to eat lunch with kunimi

‘oh, hello l/n-san’

you smiled gently

‘drop the formalities, kindaichi-kun. its only fair.’

he nodded before walking beside kunimi

‘kindaichi, l/n might be our new manager’

the onion head excitedly looked at you

‘really?! yes! so we dont have to fill our bottles ourselves anymore!’

kunimi glared at him and slapped his stomach

‘shes our manager, not our maid’

you laughed but placed an arm on him

‘its okay. i was a manager for my middle school volleyball team so i know a little bit about being one’

the two shared a look

god, they really hit the jackpot

as yall walked closer to the gym, you noticed the big pile of girls huddling at the corner

kunimi sighed

‘l/n, ill warn you ahead of time of our captain. hes kinda,,,, too much’

but you flashed him a smile

‘hes not the first one ive handled’

oml player-chan!!!

so when you opened the door and entered the gym and oikawa hit you with his normal antics, you just stared at him

‘okay and?’

hanamaki and mattsun howled before rushing to you and grabbing you in a hug

‘girls like her really exist!!’

you gave kunimi and kindaichi a signal of help and they nodded before gently prying the senpais off of you

‘senpai, please’

you gave kunimi a grateful nod

coach irihata went up to you bc wow, kunimi has a friend with of another gender?

‘how can we help you, miss?’

‘im l/n y/n, first year, and id like to apply as the manager’

internally, the coach sighed bc you werent the first one to apply

the reason they havent had a manager for years was bc of oikawa’s fangirls hiding themselves under that false facade

but he saw you brush off that comment oikawa make with no hint of fluster or blush on your face so he decides to give you a trial run, in guise of seeing if you could handle these chaotic boys

‘do you have any experience as manager? or do we need to teach you the ropes?’

‘i was a manager for 3 years in my middle school volleyball’

he nodded

‘ill give you one month. a trial run of a month to test the waters’

you agreed and your trial run began

kunimi mentioned that morning practice starts at 6 am sharp so you set your alarm for 5 to get ready and get to school on time before the boys

you remembered how to set up the nets so you quickly put them out (using a step stool bc we short) and ran to get the basket of balls

their water bottles were filled and you were in the middle of lugging the big basket of towels when the third years entered

the 4 of them usually came earlier than the rest so they saw you dragging the basket of fresh towels and wipe your sweat before smiling at the work youve done

iwa was so happy bc it was usually him who did this stuff and now that he had someone do it for him, it was like a god-send

oikawa’s eyes shone and he waved at you

‘yohoo, y/n-chan!’

you cringed at the loud voice of the famous oikawa tooru

‘hello, oikawa-san’

he chuckled at your politeness before hugging you

‘you did all this for us? youre so cute, y/n-chan!’

instead of the normal blush and love-struck eyes, you were actually very uncomfortable of the sudden skinship and you quickly ran to the side when iwa hit him at the head

‘shittykawa! leave her alone!’

‘iwa-chan!’

makki and mattsun stood next to you as the boys did their usual fight

‘is this all an act or are you really not attracted to oikawa?’

mattsun shot him a surprised look bc why was he so straightforward

but you just shrugged

‘hes cute, i admit. but ive seen much cuter and the boys in my middle school team was basically full of him so,,, and i hate guys who think theyre all that just bc theyre blessed w a pretty face. if anything, ill probably go for iwaizumi-san’

pop off S I S T E R!!!

you just won the heart of these two

slowly but surely, they all came to accept you and iwa straight out loves you bc you maintained this routine for the whole month of your trial run

and you still remained indifferent of oikawa’s advances and he was even impressed and slightly agitated that you werent paying attention to him

‘y/n-chan, one date! just one!’

you huffed before looking up from your clipboard

‘i like men, oikawa-san. not boys’

that comment made the guys shriek

‘y/n-chan! youre just a first year! you dont need a man!’

‘youre not a man, oikawa!’

you left oikawa to be tormented by his teammates and went to go and hand over the report to the coach

he was impressed by the notes you made bc they were ones he even missed

like the split-second of hesitation that kindaichi usually has that goes unnoticed but you immediately saw

or the wince oikawa has whenever he so much as jumps an inch

you could even tell the difference between iwa’s spike and if he was being easy or he was going full-out

this added on to the fact that the boys loved you and irihata actually saw kunimi try more

but he thinks its only to earn your praises

‘y/n, youre officially the team manager’

yall celebrated at the normal hang-out spot which was the ramen shop and it truly shocked you at how much these boys ate

granted, this was the first time you ate together but you didnt expect them to eat nearly 5 bowls each

you could only finish 2 and you already feel like throwing up

‘honestly, how do you guys not gain weight after this?’

the table you sat at, iwa, kindaichi, mattsun, and kunimi, looked at you and shrugged

‘i work out’

‘i run’

‘i fast’

‘i poop it out’

lmao im sorry i cackled too hard at this

you stared blankly at mattsun’s answer who said it so seriously that you snorted a laugh

they watched you and your laughter bc you havent really expressed yourself as much

so they made it their goal to see you laugh more

‘y/n-chan! you need to eat more!’

oikawa shouted, clearly food drunk, but you shook your head aggressively

‘i only planned to eat one bowl but he just had to shove another down my throat’

‘but you need to grow, y/n-chan!’

‘i want to grow taller! not wider!!’

As a manager:

oh boy

you basically grew into kinda their mom

‘oikawa-san! you need to rest your knee or youre going to hurt yourself! i will drag you home myself!’

‘kunimi, if you try to get this one more spike, i’ll buy you a bag of those caramel bites you like’

‘iwa-san! if you hit oikawa-san too much, youll destroy the little braincells he has!’

‘yahaba-san, nice dump!’

‘is your knee okay, watari-san?’

yall really forget that watari and yahaba exist sometimes smh

it was part of the work

keeping up with seijoh

so to keep them encouraged, you gave them praises that they always demand for and they always turn to you whenever they did something good

mattsun gives you a look whenever he blocks iwa’s spikes and you give kindaichi a head pat whenever he blocks some too

bc of how you are with them, sometimes, they forget that you are actually just a first year

they get shocked whenever you walk in with kunimi and kindaichi and talk about the current homework bc it slips their mind that their hard-working manager was actually just a 15-year-old girl

so, they try to ease the burden whenever they can

like iwa offering to help you whenever you have to take their jerseys to the laundrymat

or offering to help you with your assignments since theyve only been through it once

more like watari, yahaba, and iwa bc the matsuhana are clueless and acts like they completely skipped that grade

also

!!!!

oikawa’s fangirls ltr dont leave you alone!!!

now, its known that youre the manager of the volleyball team bc oikawa has boasted about your efforts and such

this obvs ticked off a bunch of girls bc they were jealous that you got to spend more time in a single practice with their precious oikawa-senpai than they have their entire lives

more than once theyve cornered you to threaten you to stay away from their senpai or youll have something coming for you

you never take them seriously bc you can fight too and you just give them a look and push them away

but this one time

TRIGGER WARNING-START

okay tea

the self-proclaimed president of the oikawa tooru fanclub, kenta miyo, cornered you at the bathroom with her other minions

you were just washing your hands and drying them off when she marched up to you and grabbed your hair before tugging it back

obviously you were surprised and shouted

‘oi! what the hell?!’

‘you slut! you need to stay away from my tooru, got it?!’

ehm what

you hissed and wrenched her arm from your hair and pushed her away

your hair was now a mess and you were fuming, already sick and tired of the torture these girls put you through

‘he belongs to himself, not you! so stop being delusional and leave me alone already!’

she signalled for the girls to hold on to you which you slapped away but they forcefully grabbed your arm while you kicked at them and struggle to get out of their hold

jesus what do these girls eat

miyo watches you struggle with a smile and cackles

‘oh? no fight anymore, little kouhai?’

you glared at her

‘i dont want to beat yall up bc id get yelled at by tooru so you need to let me go or regret it’

at the mention of his first name, her eyes widened and her face twisted and she slapped you

‘oi! respect your senpai, you brat! dont you ever say oikawa’s first name!’

your lips curled

‘oh? thats funny, because he actually told me to call him that since he wants his cute little manager to be very comfortable with him’

you achieved a feat that she has been working to get her entire high school life and miyo was not happy

‘ive been with him for 3 years and you just suddenly show up out of nowhere and call him that?! i dont think so!’

she had her hands around your neck and you gripped her arms, making her wince

but you laughed at that comment

‘heh, thats pathetic, isn’t it? here you are, my senpai, who has been vying for his attention for 3 years only to be ignored yet a mere first year, who shows up out of nowhere, has been asked to a date nearly a million times every day. that must be tough’

she shrieked at that comment and threw you on the floor, making you accidentally hit your head at the edge of the sink

yall im actually so bothered by this scene and im wincing as im typing

you bit your lip to prevent any sound of pain to escape bc you knew thats what she wanted to hear from you

but you werent going to give her the satisfaction

instead, you looked up at her, hatred swirling in your eyes

‘youre freaking psycho, you know that? once tooru and hajime knows about this, theyre going to give you hell. they wont ever let this go bc im the manager of their prized team and their little baby sister. so go ahead, do what you want with me. bc i paid too much for these nails to be tainted by dirt like you’

saiyo, a girl you noticed to be watari’s classmate when you went and visited him, nervously tugged on miyo’s jacket

‘miyo, we should go-’

‘SHES BLUFFING. AND HERE, SINCE YOUR SOCCERFIELD FOREHEAD IS BLEEDING, LET ME HELP WASH IT OUT’

and she poured over a carton of banana milk over you, making you wince at the sticky and cold liquid

the tough facade was crumbling and you were now screaming for help in your head, hoping that stupid theory from yahaba about team telepathy to work

but it didnt

TRIGGER WARNING-END

when miyo and her girls left, you sat on the floor, soaked and sticky and bleeding

then you begin to cry angry tears

you were angry that you were being treated like this just bc you were a manager

you were angry that you let them do that to you

you were angry that you prized your nails more than punching her square in the nose

you were just angry

periodt

staggering on your own feet, you stood up and leaned on the sink, eyes widening at the dripping red liquid from the gash on your forehead, staining the porcelain sink

you were stupid and unconsciously touched it making you wince

‘shit, that hurts’

you whined quietly

there was little you can do with toilet paper and water to clean yourself up but you managed to at least stop the bleeding

you knew you had to be put on concussion protocol just in case bc you that hit was quite hard but at the moment, that wasnt your concern

practice has already started and this was the first time you werent present for daily practice

this was confirmed at the constant buzzing of your phone in your skirt pocket which you didnt listen to and instead, started thinking of ways to go to your locker and get your stuff and fake being sick but at the same time, not be seen and relayed to the team

time was ticking and you had to come up with a plan fast before oikawa will send the team to come looking around the building for you

once you looked at your reflection and smiled big, you decided it was enough to not show the pain you were in right now

girl im hurting for you

you peeked out of the bathroom door and saw the coast was clear so you quickly ran to your classroom, which was thankfully empty, and quickly grabbed your things

but as you were packing up, the tears just kept falling

it didnt stop as you bolted down the stairs, using your cardigan to hide your face from the public

once you were safely out of school grounds, you finally took out your phone and reviewed through all the worried and concerned texts from the team group chat

but you just replied, ‘im fine but i just feel really sick right now. girl stuff’

you smirked, knowing that would keep the boys away

but oikawa had to go and ask you to call him

‘y/n-chan! do you want oikawa-senpai to come over with chocolates and ice cream?! wings or no wings?!’

your jaw dropped at the question and clearly scandalized by the question

the team was too as shouting began and you could faintly hear iwa scream, ‘oh my god, shittykawa!’

‘im seriously okay, oikawa-san. i just need to be alone right now and ill try and get some sleep. good bye’

then you hung up

there was no way you could tell them

they were in their last year anyways so doing something about it wouldnt matter

and you were strong

but apparently not strong enough to fight them off though

you would cover the wound with concealer and continue on with practice tomorrow as if everything was normal

but there was only so much you could take

just yesterday, they trashed your locker and a week ago, they took your bento and threw it away

you even got into a fight with this one girl but she scampered away, too scared to do anything alone

so you were actually just tired and want everyone to leave you alone

believe me, youve thought of quitting sometimes

but youve actually created a bond with these boys

like when you take hanamaki to get cream puffs whenever he loses against iwa in arm wrestling

or when yahaba calls you at ungodly hours to express his worries for next year and to fill oikawa’s shoes

it was simple moments that you shared with each player that kept you from not leaving

soon, you found yourself crying again and the looks pedestrians were giving you was starting to make you uncomfortable

a girl, with her gross hair in a bun, puffy eyes with a bleeding wound and walking down the street

that was a sight

so you cut a corner to an alley by your house to escape from the judging eyes and you were too busy wiping your eyes to see a boy who was crouched down on the floor and ended up walking over him

omg my baby kyoken hello luv!!!!

you gasped and you were surprised and quickly apologized

kyotani was originally about to yell at you, no matter what, but he saw the state you were in and concluded you were either from a fight or was beaten up

he recognized that and decided to just glare at you and go back to feeding the stray dogs and cats

you breathed a sigh in relief when he didnt yell at you bc that wouldve been the last thing you needed today

‘sir, im sorry for hitting you. if there is something i could do for you, dont hesitate’

he ignored you and you focused on him paying attention to the strays

going into your backpack, you had a milk carton and a sausage stick from earlier

you used your thermos lid to serve as the milk bowl for the cats while you peeled open the meat and used your scissors to cut chunks of it for the dogs to have some

kyotani watched as you went into action to feeding the animals that people usually ignored

he knew you

well, he recognized you

when he watched from the top of the gym, he saw you as their manager who ran around and helped everyone

sure, he still didnt trust you

but he watched you grin and smile as the animals started to eat

‘im in a hurry right now so i have to go but ill feed you again tomorrow, okay? you too, stranger-san. ill bring food for you too’

then you stood up and ran away, probably in a hurry to fix that wound

he wouldve offered to treat it for you but he remained silent, watching the cats mewl at the now empty lid

the next day, oikawa was worried for you and when he saw you at early morning practice, he practically glomped to your side

‘y/n-chan! you okay?! oikawa-senpai was so worried for you!’

you cringed but nodded

‘im okay, oikawa-san’

‘senpai, y/n-chan! call me senpai!’

‘im not going to feed into your kink, oikawa-san’

*cue everyone busting a lung*

to this day, no one still knew what happened to you

you kept it quiet and you were sure you got everything handled

except for one person

kyotani was smart and for some reason he knew you got beat up by the fangirls and the perpetrators were easily found bc he saw them huddled around your locker, probably trashing it again, and lets just say,

no one is def going to mess w you now

back to manager moments!!

during practice matches, the boys rally around you to prevent other teams from sweet-talking you

they make sure no one gets past them and always have excuses to get your attention

you knew what they were doing but you pretended not to, heart warming at their protectiveness and hunger for your attention

even though you have your own jacket, the team gives you theirs all the time like oikawa has his special team jacket w his name at the back and when he feels threatened by schools like johzenji, he makes you wear it

‘youre mine, y/n-chan and i want that blondie to know’

‘ehm, no, oikawa-san. im iwaizumi-san’s’

oikawa screamed

lmao training camps w them is CHAOTIC

YOU WANT TO CRYYYYYY

OIKAWA IS CRYING BC IWAIZUMI IS BEATING HIM UP, MATSUHANA ARE FREAKING OUT THE FIRST YEARS ABOUT THE GHOSTS IN THE WOODS AND NOW KINDAICHI REFUSES TO LET GO OF YOU, WATARI GOT LOST GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND YAHABA IS SCREAMING ABOUT THE WEATHER MESSING UP HIS HAIR AND MAKING IT FRIZZY

reminder: threaten to quit everytime they get too much

your hugs are the best!!!!

you have a special hug for every player

oikawa gets his favorite which was the normal arm around the waist with your arms around his neck while he snuggles in your neck

iwa gets flustered easily so you hug him from behind so you cant see his flustered look

mattsun actually likes the jumping in the air so he catches you type of hug

makki is more tame and has his arms around your shoulder with his chin on your head

yahaba is the twirly kind where he just picks you up and swings you around

watari also gets flustered easily so he likes the one-arm hugs

kindaichi gets blushy at the slightest touch from you but he gives you a hug from behind you himself where he can bury his face in your hair while you caress his arms

kunimi, now he likes it when you squeeze him extremely tight bc it makes him feel loved and feel alive

kyo doesnt even talk to you what makes you think you can give him a hug

their lost for shiratorizawa really broke them though

you made them their own bentos for nearly a week to keep them encouraged and gave oikawa extra attention to keep him from sulking or practicing late

‘oikawa-senpai, lets go watch that new movie later’

‘S-S-SENPAI?!’

then the arrival of our baby kyoken

yahaba was moody the whole practice and you were currently trying to keep him from spiking a ball to someone

‘even just today, he’s late’

‘who?’

‘that stupid dog’

he just keeps mumbling and grunting

and then the said dog arrived

you peaked out from behind iwaizumi, who protectively went in front of you

shock ran through you and you pointed at him

‘puppy-kun!’

lmao puppy what

youve called him that since he refused to tell you his name, but you call him that bc he paid special attention to this one baby beagle

he raised a hand in greeting and you gave him a smile

‘youre a player here, too?!’

he ‘glared’ at you but nodded stiffly

the team really thought that he would lash out at you but he is surprisingly tolerant

the power of the manager

he still hasnt talked to you but he does respond to you and even helps you with chores, still not talking ofc

hes so tsun tsun and he deserves my heart yall

however, youve heard him talk to iwaizumi, and iwaizumi only, so youve heard his voice before

ngl, you were flustered by how gruff and deep it was

then their loss to karasuno

bruh, it was KARASUNO

the entire team fell apart and after the match, each of them ran away from you to stop lashing out

you were also on the verge of crying, seeing the broken look on your third years

your precious third years

you decided to give them their own space but you heard a loud banging sound from the bathroom

yahaba and watari were outside, clearly trying to talk to someone in there on coming out but it got louder

okay you were lowkey like, ‘hm, i should not be here’

but you recognized that voice

you knocked at the boys door to be respectful

‘kyo-san? its me, y/n’

he was silent but he did unlock it

you took this as a sign to enter and you gave yahaba and watari a smile

‘i’ll be fine. go to kindaichi and kunimi. they need your comfort right now’

tbh, you were surprised the bathroom was still intact but you saw the stall door at the very end being rattled and shaken

you remained by the door but you wanted to go to him

‘kyo-san, please come out so i can treat your injuries’

he expected you to say those words like ‘its okay’ or ‘theres always next year’ but you didnt

instead, you knew he was hurt and wanted to help him

he continued to give a few punches to the wall and the door before emerging

you wordlessly treated the wounds and offered your hand

‘im here, kyo-san. dont worry, im right here’

at the ramen shop, you told them to eat as much as they want and wordlessly gave them your card, slightly crying inside bc you know this was going to be like over a hundred dollars

but you were treating the boys bc they deserved it

you sat beside kindaichi, who was just sobbing and apologizing, so you were wiping his tears and holding his hand under the table

this precious babie

bruh i was sobbing when i watched this part like uuggghhhh

after dinner, you walked with the other third years, knowing they would go to the gym, so you gave everyone else your special hugs before sending them home

‘text me when you arrive safely, okay?’

‘yes, mom’

‘KINDAICHI WHAT’

oikawa’s speech made you cry bc despite only knowing them for not even a year, you already feel like a family

you didnt want your family to be broken but you knew they would all go their separate ways eventually

there was a big hug pile of third years on the side where you took a picture and sent it to the group chat

you had to eventually go home after helping them clean up and when you checked your phone, a fresh batch of tears rolled down

each from every person on the team but with the same sentence and same words

‘we love you, l/n y/n. thanks for everything.’

ngl i dont think this was that good and its like 8 in the morning and im extremely tired

i want to do karasuno, nekoma, and fukurodani but im so exhausted i cannot right now

2K notes · View notes

doyumacy · 4 years ago

Text

𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲?

𝙜𝙞𝙛 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙢𝙞𝙣𝙚

𝗷𝗲𝗻𝗼 𝘅 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘅 𝗷𝗮𝗲𝗺𝗶𝗻

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗴𝗲, 𝘀𝗺𝘂𝘁 (𝘂𝗻𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝘅, 𝗼𝗿𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗲𝘅 𝗺 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳. 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗲𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴) 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗮𝗻𝗴𝘀𝘁

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 𝟰,𝟳𝗸

hello i read a lot of your works and i think theyre really good. i was hoping to request for a jeno×reader×jaemin. now, not a threesome, thats not what i mean. but like maybe the reader is dating one and the other secretly likes her too and idk i think just angsty smutty and yk all that. she can end up with anyone tbh.

𝗶 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗱 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗹𝘆, 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝘆 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀.

𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗲?

𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗱𝗿𝗶𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝗮𝗻𝗲.

Jeno and you have been together for around 2 years, and many people believe Jaemin is also dating you two since the three of you are practically always together. You don't really mind since you like him and is nice being around him.

You occasionally find him staring at you or checking you out when you wear sexy clothes, and you don't pay attention to it since boys do that all time, right? You also don't mind him checking you out because you surely have checked him out as well.

And he's handsome.

Very handsome.

Jeno and Jaemin have been friends for a few years and even share an apartment, so it's not unusual seeing Jaemin there. Of course, he kind of knows when things get steamy and always leave the place so you and Jeno can have a bit of privacy.

One night, you arrive at their apartment wearing a short silk black dress and black jacket covering your shoulders. Jaemin is quick to open the door and smiles when he sees you. "Hey."

"Hi," you grin. "Is Jeno home yet?"

He shakes his head and sets aside to let you in. "He texted me he'll be here in 15 minutes."

You groan and Jaemin shuts the door behind you. "Jeno is always late." Jaemin fixes his gaze on your butt and then clears his throat.

"You want to drink something?" Jaemin asks as he walks to the kitchen.

You nod. "A beer please."

You take your jacket off and place it on the armchair. "You're not going out with us tonight?"

Jaemin is back holding two beer bottles and hands one to you. "No, I have class tomorrow at 7 am and I know you guys won't be back until 3 am."

You giggle and have a sip of beer. "Maybe tomorrow we can hang out," you proposed as you sit. You cross your leg.

Jaemin gulps at the image of you with that short silk dress, half of your legs naked. So hot.

The fuck am I thinking? Stop.

Jaemin sits in front of you and nods. "That's what Jeno said."

You stay quiet for a couple of seconds and then look at him. "It would've been fun if you were coming."

Jaemin is sure his heart will jump out of his chest at your words. Why are you saying that?

Dude, you're his friend. Don't overreact.

Jaemin smiles sideways. "Maybe if you give me a reason to skip my class I can go."

You smirk. "Let me think of something," you purse your lips as if thinking. "You could meet someone tonight."

Jaemin chuckles and shakes his head. "Not enough."

You sigh and squint your eyes, looking at him. "I'm trying to decipher what could make you go."

"Maybe if a girl with a black silken dress dances with me, I'll go," he says as he stares at you.

You thoughtlessly bite your lip and nod with your head. "Then I better get ready."

(...)

At the club, you have been by Jeno's side all night. And you know you owe a Jaemin a dance but you couldn't dance with him the way you want to since Jeno and a few more friends are there.

You sigh internally. Why are you thinking of Jaemin when you're practically grinding on Jeno? Maybe it's because he looks so damn good in that red shirt. Or perhaps you have had enough alcohol.

"Baby," you whisper to Jeno, "I'm gonna go to the restroom."

"You want me to go with you?" He asks.

You shake your head. "I'll be right back."

He kisses you before you and you walk among the people dancing. Once you're in the restroom, you wash your hands with cold water and you get your face a little wet.

You exhale.

Out of the corner of your eye you see the bathroom door open and you ignore it, thinking it is a girl. You raise your head up to watch yourself in the mirror and startle when you see Jaemin behind you.

"Jaemin!" You turn around. "What are you doing here?"

"You owe me a dance," he cocks an eyebrow at you.

"I'm not gonna dance with you in the restroom," you shake your head.

"I had other things in my mind," he stares at your lips.

Jaemin is drunk, like, super drunk.

"Like w-what?" You almost whisper when you feel your hips trapped against the sink. He has his arms on each side of the sink.

Jaemin laughs in response. "Don't play innocent with me. You've been watching me all night."

"Your... hair looks nice pushed back," you bite your lip

Jaemin looks at you in the eye. Your gaze flickered over his face, his eyes, his cheeks, his nose. Over to his mouth. There are just one thing you have forbidden yourself to think about. And that thing is Na Jaemin.

Something about this situation tells you that all the pent up feelings are going to escalate into something you are going to regret bitterly. But right now, you couldn't care less.

"Yeah?" Jaemin presses his hips against yours.

"Yes," you say breathless. "I kind of want to pull it."

"Well," he starts planting kisses on your neck. "I want you, I want to be close to you, to touch you, to fuck you..." he whispers in your ear. His hot breath hit your cheek, and you gasp as Jaemin runs his tongue along your jaw. Jaemin grabs your waist and pushes you back until your back is up against the wall. You shudder. Jaemin one then thrust his hips up once against your crotch, and you get goosebumps all over your body. "Fuck you until you can't move the next day," he murmurs, biting your earlobe, hard.

"I don't think you know who you're talking about," You force out.

"I think I do."

"And I think I want you to fuck off."

"I don't think you do. I am not in the mood to wait any longer."

"I can hear myself saying yes to that."

Jaemin rolls his eyes and sighs. "Oh, please, stop this act, you've been undressing me with your eyes every day for who knows how long."

"If you think you can have it the easy wa-"

Jaemin cuts you off. "I think a dick in your obsequious little mouth would shut you u-..."

But you already grab Jaemin's black hair and pull him in for a passionate kiss to shut his mouth up. Jaemin kisses back with force, shoves his tongue eagerly into your mouth, licks into it, hot and messy, and his lips tastes spicy and wonderful and that is all you can think of as Jaemin's hard, hot body pressed against your own, pinning you against the cold wall in your back, and you push your hands under his shirt, his fingers tracing the hard muscles of his back while Jaemin's lips caresses your neck.

Suddenly there is a knock at the door.

You share a look, slowly entangling themselves from each other in an instant, breathing heavily, hearts racing. "y/n? Are you okay in there, baby?" Jeno's worried voice.

"Y-yes!" You say. "I'll be out in a minute!"

(...)

It’s been a couple of days since the restroom event and you haven't had the guts to face Jaemin, and apparently neither does he. But you're sure about one thing: not telling Jeno because things will end up horribly and that’s the last thing you want.

When you’re done doing your homework, you get up from your chair and go to the kitchen where your friend Heejin is making dinner. “Are you making spaghetti?”You ask.

“Yeah,” she smiles. “Can you pass me the salt, please?”

You grab the salt and pass it to her. Little does she know you're being too loud. “Whats up?”

“Huh?” You look at her.

“Something’s wrong, what is it?” Heejin inquiries.

You purse your lips. “I’m going to hell.”

Heejin chuckles. “It’s been clear, but why?”

“Screw you,” you giggle and then sigh. “I kind of made out with Jaemin nights ago…”

“What?!” Heejin drops the spoon and stares at you. “Na Jaemin? Jaemin as Jeno’s friend?”

“Why do you have to remind me he’s friends with Jeno?!” You groan and run a hand through your hair.

“You my friend, are going to hell alive,” Heejin laughs. “How was it?”

“So good,” you whine. “I can’t get him off my head, Heejin.”

Heejin whistles. “Then go for it.”

“Are you insane?!” You stare at her. “What kind of friend are you?”

“A lousy one,” Heejin shrugs. “I mean, I kinda get you? He’s fine. If I were you I’d have sucked him off time ago.”

“I’m gonna go and pretend this conversation didn't happen,” you say.

(...)

You know Jeno is not home and you don't know why you are standing in front of his apartment door. Maybe it’s because you know Jaemin is home.

You exhale and turn on your heels to leave when the door suddenly opens. You curse internally.

Jaemin is wearing black sweatpants and a white sweater. His hair is messy and he looks even hotter. He frowns when he sees you. “y/n? what are you doing here?”

“Ah…” You try to come up with something, “I left my charger here and I need it, but Jeno’s not home so I’m leaving.”

“You know Jeno is not home at this hour every Wednesday,” he leans against the doorframe and smiles. “Were you looking for me?”

You hiss. “No.”

Jaemin chuckles and crosses his arms over his chest, still leaning against the doorframe. “Wanna come in?”

No. “Yes.”

Jaemin steps aside so you can get in and as you do, you gulp. You’re there for a reason and as much as you denied it to yourself, you can’t resist Jaemin and his lovely charms.

You feel Jaemin hands on your shoulders and you sigh at his touch. “You seem stressed.”

“You’re making me stressed,” you murmur.

Jaemin slightly laughs. “Why am I the only guilty here?”

“Because you’re the one taking advantage,” you hiss.

“You can go, you know? Door’s unlocked,” Jaemin grabs your hair and moves it aside leaving your neck uncovered and he kisses the back of your neck.

You choke a moan and turn on your heels so you can kiss him. Jaemin's mouth molds perfectly against yours, a soft sigh leaving you as he falls into the pit of longing and craving and all over desire.

Fuck this feels so good and it's just a kiss.

You grips Jaemin's sides beneath his sweater, letting your nails dig into his soft skin as he pulls you closer. You don't mean to let out the shocked noise you did when Jaemin pushes his tongue into your mouth. It seems to edge you on more and you tangle your tongue with Jaemin.

A weird mix of a pained gasp and a pleasured moan leaves your lips as he pulls away from you.

Jaemin's hand runs down the curve of your spine, slowly spreading over your ass before squeezing making you jump.

He presses a rough kiss to your parted lips, nipping at your bottom lip as he pulls away. You groan softly at all of the sensations you are feeling.

“You okay with this?” Jaemin asks.

“Yes.” You breathe out, hoping the one worded consent is enough for Jaemin to just keep going and touch you.

Jaemin roughly kisses you again, pulling you out of the room before your lips can even break apart.

You let yourself be dragged into his room. The door slams, Jaemin is all over you, hands wandering your body like they’re lost and searching for something.

You take it upon yourself to kiss Jaemin this time, surprising him slightly. Jaemin instantly melts against you though as you fall into each other and lick into each other’s mouths like it's all you can do.

Jaemin pulls away to breathe and his hands grip the hem of your shirt as he kisses your neck, “Can this come off?”

You are already pulling the shirt over your head. You kiss him back. "Your turn."

Jaemin smirks. "Remove it."

You grab his shirt in your fists and yanks it off of him, messing up his hair. You can't even think a coherent thought, Jaemin is beautiful.

He presses his chest to yours as he leans in to kiss your neck. Jaemin sinks his teeth into the sensitive skin beneath your ear and you almost fall to the ground as you gasp.

You lose control as Jaemin licks and sucks into your skin. Your glorious, warm, beautiful skin that Jaemin has wanted to touch for so long.

Your hands move to shakily mess with the hem of his sweatpants, Jaemin sinks his teeth into your shoulder and groans when he feels your hands brush against his dick. Jaemin presses opened mouth kisses to your neck and collarbones, breathing heavily against your skin as your hands push his sweatpants down.

Jaemin kicks them off and to the side, his skin felt hot all over and you are just so eager to touch him.

You feel your belt being pulled from the loops in your jeans as Jaemin kisses your jaw. You move back to look him in the eyes, crashing his lips back to his as he unbuttons your jeans. Once they were on the floor, Jaemin smiles looking at your black laced panties. "Someone came prepared."

"Shut up," you blush.

"Make me," he challenges you.

You kneel down and it surprises him when you remove his boxers. "Love," he calls and you shush him while fisting his growing member. Jaemin closes his eyes shut when you lick the side of his cock, biting his lip to prevent a series of groans to emerge.

You give the tip a lick, kissing it as it oozes precum. "Love." Jaemin calls once again, looking down on you. Damn, you look so hot kneeling in front of him like that.

"Yes, Jaemin?" You smile at him.

"Don't tease," Jaemin warns.

You wink at him before doing the deed.

Your mouth is really hot or maybe because his cock is really sensitive but it feels so good that groans escapes his lips. You suck his cock, playing with it inside your mouth and even fondling his balls. Jaemin's hands reaches for your hair, tugging it in a ponytail as he bobs your head up and down on his cock. Jaemin hisses, badly wishing his control wouldn't spill out, but with a mouth so good like this how can he not fuck your mouth?

"Baby, you're so fucking good." He compliments as the hold on your hair gets tighter. You swallow his cock, deepthroating him that makes him groan. "Oh God, y/n." And that is it, his control going down the drain. He thrusts into your mouth with so much power. He keeps on groaning as he fuck you mouth and feels himself cumming in no time. His cum fills your mouth, swallowing it.

When Jaemin comes back from his high, he gives you a mischievous smile as he grabs your chin with two fingers. "Open up," you open your mouth and he checks you have swallowed everything. "Good girl."

He pushes you to the bed and his mouth kisses your stomach and you moan. "Jaemin..." You call. Jaemin doesn't stop his adventure of going down until he is at the waistband of your panties "Fuck, Jaemin." And you know what will happen now that he is pulling down your underwear.

His tongue immediately licks your clit and you moan, arching your back at the sensation. Jaemin part your legs and starts fucking you with his tongue, making you scream in pleasure. His thumb starts circling your clit as he alternates the sucking and licking of your pussy. You can feel your soul being sucked by Jaemin’s mouth. And yes, that's how amazing he is. You come in no time, letting him suck everything.

He grins while rubbing his mouth using the back of his hand and that gesture looks so sexy, so deadly. "Oh, God. Just fuck me," you exclaim that made him smirk.

Jaemin gives his cock a few strokes and positioned it on your entrance, making you nod. His cock sinks inside you and he groans at how tight you are. He starts jerking into you violently.

You can feel your body being thrown to bed with each thrust and his cock hitting you in the pleasure spot. With the way that he is going, you are sure you'd get so sore the next day.

"Jaemin!" You shout as one hand grabs the sheets of his bed and the other scratches his back, wanting something to claw on. He is jerking into you real hard that you can hear his balls slamming against your skin.

"Yes, fuck baby." he curses while jerking in you in such power and speed, driving both their orgasms. You come with a mind rippling orgasm and immediately feel him filling you up.

“Fuck,” you whisper, panting.

Jaemin is panting on your neck and then rolls over next to you. “That was g-”

“Great,” you finish, staring at the roof. “Oh shit.”

“What?” He looks at you.

“Wanna repeat?”

“Fuck yeah.” Jaemin smirks. “Roll on your stomach, baby,” he orders.

(...)

You didn’t mean to.

That’s what you tell yourself as you take the walk of shame home.

You didn’t mean to.

You can’t even look at Jeno, you don’t know how to speak to Jeno, your heart breaks every time he texts you. You are the shittiest and you know he doesnt deserve what you did.

Your guilt weighs down your shoulders. You feel like shit and you know Jeno will be devastated if he ever finds out. You and Jaemin are his favorite people in this world. Your poker face will be the first giveaway. And you remind yourself to forget what happened.

You sigh in exasperation, running your hands through your hair, chewing on your lip. You are looking for someone to blame. You want to pin it all on Jaemin, scream at him for making it happen. But it wasn’t just him. You are too.

You swear to yourself that it won’t happen again.

Until... it happens.

“Fuck,” you pant, “we can’t keep doing this.”

“I know,” Jaemin rolls off of you and lays next to you.

“But it’s just so good,” you sigh, leaning down on your elbows.

“You are so good,” Jaemin stares at you.

You chuckle. “Shut up and leave.”

“I feel used,” Jaemin complains, getting off the bed looking for his clothes.

“Poor ba-” A knock on the door interrupts you both and you frown.

“Are you waiting for someone?”

You shake your head and then your eyes wide open when you hear Jeno’s voice outside. “Fuck,” you whisper, almost jumping off the bed. “Shit, shit… okay, uhm… he knows I’m home because my car’s downstairs. Shit Jaemin…”

“I’ll just hide…” He takes a look at your room. “Under your bed.”

You put on some clothes and nod at his idea. Once Jaemin is under your bed, you leave your room and go to open the door. Your boyfriend is wearing his brightest smile. “Sorry for not telling you I was coming but I just missed you.” He pouts.

You gulp.

You’re a piece of shit.

“I miss you, too,” you manage to say and smile. “But I was on my way out.”

“Oh damn,” he sighs. “I was hoping we could spend the day together.”

“We can,” you smile. “But not here, Heejin has someone in her bedroom.”

“Let’s go to my place then,” he kisses your forehead. “Jaemin’s gone.”

You smirk and nod.

(...)

“It can’t happen again, Jaemin,” you sigh when his lips kiss your neck.

You’re laying on your back on Jaemin’s bed. For the third time in the week. You don't know why (yes you do) you keep coming back to him.

He hums, continuing kissing your neck and sometimes nipping at it. “You look really pretty today,” his fingers the hem of your dress.

“I-I’m meeting Jeno later,” you stammer.

“He can keep on waiting,” he whispers in your ear and bites your earlobe.

As you look up at him, he brings something over your eyes. Something soft, silky. A scarf? His sleep-mask? What is it? You don’t think about it anymore, as he caresses your body. “I wanna try something.”

His fingers flit over you, a soft touch here at your cheek, a kiss there by your hip. You moan, softly, inaudibly. But Jaemin hears it, of course he does. His low chuckle tells you that he hears it. You feel the bed shift, and his breath is suddenly warm on your face as he whispers against your ear, “Not yet, baby. Not yet.” The bed shifts again, an absence of breath that isn’t yours, and something wet touches your peaked breast, causing you to gasp.

His tongue.

You groan, your back arching, attempting to force more contact, any sort of contact. Jaemin places a hand on your shoulder and pushes, you resist momentarily, but eventually sink back into the bed, waiting. Always waiting. His hands are on your thighs now, massaging the soft flesh there. So close, but so far. You’re wetter now, if that’s even possible. Not knowing what he will do makes you ache with need.

Jaemin holds back, shifting between your legs, placing them around his waist. But even then, he is not done. He isn’t even undressed. You mewl in frustration, and there’s that laugh again. It’s so frustrating, and you try to gyrate against him, to feel some part of your lover against your core. Against you.

Your clit grazes a seam on Jaemi’s jeans causing you to buck your hips, ecstatic at the contact, but when you attempt to go back to it, it’s gone. He holds himself away from you. And then suddenly he is gone from between your thighs, punishing you it would seem with the far off sound of a zipper, a whisper of denim dropping to the floor. You whimper, missing his presence, and a soft plea escapes your lips. “Please?”

“Beg. Beg for it, baby girl.” His voice is almost a purr, so close to your ear but there’s no tell-tale mist of breath.

You groan. “Jaemin!”

“Good girls ask for it,” he bites your earlobe.

You sigh. “Please just fuck me.”

Jaemin smirks and plants a kiss on your lips. “Okay.”

(...)

You end up seeing Jaemin at least twice a week for the past 2 months, and whenever Jeno asks you where you are, you reply by saying you’re busy with uni stuff. And Jeno is not stupid, he knows something’s off with you, but he decides to give yous some space because you might be going through something and when you need him, you eventually will talk to him.

But more days pass and he knows what is happening.

He knows it because he knows you so well, because there are details so huge Jeno can’t keep ignoring.

Your guilty expression, for starters.

And a different smell on your skin, the smell that perhaps he is the only one to catch, but can’t go away. And Jeno has an idea of who that smell belongs to.

So, one night Jeno gets inside of the apartment aware of what might be happening.

Jeno sees your clothes all over the place and he perfectly hears your moans coming from Jaemin’s room, which door is slightly open. He swallows and walks quietly just to see you on top of his best friend. His girlfriend fucking his best friend.

He returns to the living room and sits there, having to listen to your moans and your cries of pleasure. After a few minutes, the torture is gone and all he can hears in your panting breaths, and the next Jeno sees is Jaemin and you leaving his room. You’re wearing one of Jaemin’s shirt and your panties.

You two freeze when you see Jeno, sitting on the couch staring at you both. “Nothing to say?” He asks, challenging.

You gulp and open your mouth but you can't articulate words.

Jeno stands up and runs a hand through his hair. “The writing’s always been on the wall. Everyone warned me about how Jaemin looked at you but I ignored it because he was my friend.”

“Jeno…” Jaemin starts talking.

“And I just found you fucking my girlfrined,” Jeno laughs bitterly and looks at you. “And you, how could you do this to me, y/n? I love you!”

You slowly look up and you can see the tears in his eyes. Your heart rate returns as it begins to pound in your chest, tears formed in your eyes but refuse to let them fall.

Jaemin can’t bring himself to look at Jeno so he keeps his eyes to the floor. Jeno paces back and forth, trying to think but all he thinks is hurtful words. You want to explain yourself but you know Jeno won't let you speak.

“I’m sorry, Jeno,” you whisper.

“How long?” He stares at you. “How long have you two been fucking?”

You two still cannot look at him and you sigh. “Answer me!”

“Two months…” Jaemin replies.

Jeno nods, turns around and crosses the room picking up his jacket. As he pulls the jacket on, he catches sight of your face. Tears are streaming down your cheeks. “Don’t fucking cry.”

As Jeno walks to the door, he turns to see Jaemin. "I'm staying at Mark’k,I want your crap out of my place by tonight and I dont ever want to see your fucking face,” he says and looks at you. “Same goes for you.”

“Jeno, please let me expl-” you try to say.

Jeno throws the door open and marches into the hall. The door slams shut behind him. He marched down the hall and into the stairwell. He takes the stairs two at a time until he reaches the lobby. For a moment, he isn’t sure where to go next. Maybe to the nearest bar and get drunk until he erases your face from his memory.

(...)

It has been 8 weeks since the last time you see Jeno or Jaemin. Jaemin hasn't stopped texting you or calling and to be honest you don't wanna see him, but you miss him.

And there is something you cannot explain, why do you miss Jaemin so much?

You know you’re the worst person in the world right now. You destroyed their friendship and probably destroyed Jeno’s life.

You sigh getting up from your bed. Your head hurts from thinking too much and you can’t find an answer to one single question. Heejin won’t help and probably can’t call Mark or Donghyuck since they will stand with Jeno. They must hate you right now.

More days pass and you realize that Jeno has changed his class schedule and even his teachers so as not to go into the same classes with you.

As you’re leaving the campus, you spot Jaemin walking to his car. Oh, you want to talk to him so bad.

He looks as bad as you.

You don't know how but your legs start making their way to Jaemin. He notices you and he seems to tense up. You stand in front of him and say nothing. He lowers his head and sighs, then he’s quick. He pulls you closer for a hug. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” he whispers.

You wrap your arms around his waist and snuggle into his neck. “I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” he kisses your forehead. “What are we doing?”

“I don’t know,” you reply. “This is so wrong, Jaemin. We shouldn't be doing this.”

“I know,” he cups your face, “but I can’t stop thinking of you. This is not okay, y/n. We fucked up.”

You can feel the tears streaming down your face. “We should stop seeing each other.”

“Yes,” Jaemin murmurs, “but I don’t want to.”

“Jaemin,” you sob.

Jaemin kisses you. You love how heavenly his lips feel against yours, how his warm touch is hot and it sends electricity coursing through your veins.

“Let me take you on a date. Let’s do things correctly this time,” Jaemin rubs your right cheek.

You know it’s selfish, but deep down you know you developed feelings for him. And so he did.

You nod. “We’ll go slow, okay?”

Jaemin kisses your cheek and smiles. “I promise.”

You don't know how the rest of the guys will react, or if you two will work out, but you are willing to give it a shot. To try.

#jeno smut #jeno x reader #jeno imagine #jaemin smut #jaemin x reader #jaemin imagine #nct dream x reader #nct dream #na jaemin #lee jeno #nct dream smut

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