#i have endless feelings

[beevean]

Honestly Julia is so overlooked. She was also done dirty by CoD. Rosaly was given the chance to shine in both the MF manga and PtR as the cutest thing, but Julia? No, she only has the game to go by, and CoD doesn’t exactly have the best presentation.

But still! I love love love this comment that Michiru Yamane left on her theme, Sarabande of Healing:

“I want to heal her, forced to bear the fate of her brother. Yet she's the one healing Hector! Why?!”

Oh, that hurts :(

The theme itself represents her personality. It starts off with a soothing celesta, that makes you feel all cozy inside, much like her shop is a place of rest for Hector (it even has a rocking chair for him to sit on)... but soon enough, that celesta gets replaced by a haunting, sorrowful cello. And the celesta doesn’t come back. It’s just that cello, painting her inner pain, that she tries so hard to hide.

Because that’s what Julia does: she hides her feelings. Think back of her first cutscene:

She meets a stranger who’s looking for Isaac, and she asks him what’s his relationship with him. He says that he’s his most bitter enemy, and by his voice it’s clear that he has murderous intentions. Julia... offers her help, and calls Isaac her enemy as well. When you know that she’s talking about her brother, it hits you hard.

And when Isaac dies, the most she shows is a sad face. She’s still repressing.

“The curse has reached deep inside of them. Its mark will not easily vanish. For my brother, only death could erase it.”

And when Hector starts to express sympathy, she immediately changes subject to a more positive topic, as if nothing happened.

There are clues that Julia and Isaac care about each other to some degree. First, Isaac’s reaction upon seeing her in Cordova Town, right in the middle of his fight with Hector:

He retreats Abel first thing, and then he runs away. He could have killed Hector right there when he was distracted... but no. Not when Julia is in danger of being involved. Sure, he does the whole “nah not worth killing you, become stronger first” spiel, but then why retreating Abel and making himself more vulnerable? To not hurt Julia, perhaps? The fact that he even thinks of that, as he’s Cursed up to his hair and hyperfocused on Hector, tells a lot.

And another thing that tells a lot is this comment from Julia:

“No, Hector. You must be the one to defeat him. My brother had always respected you.”

How does she know that? Yes, she has premonition powers (somehow she knew about Rosaly), but nothing indicates that she’s a mind reader. Did... Did Isaac tell her, at some point? Were they in touch when he was working for Dracula? And did he talk positively about Hector? If so, that is just wholesome 💖

So give back that wholesomeness and get this kick in the teeth from the Japanese script :)

“Only then I could accept it. Even if I lose my family...”

Julia is a witch. She was persecuted, all the way to Western Europe (Italy, maybe? Her name sounds very Italian if you fix the spelling). Whatever Isaac went through as a child, she probably did too. The MF manga implies that Isaac dragged her with him to Castlevania, but for some reason she’s never seen there - she didn’t find a place where she was allowed to exist. Then, years later, she saw her brother lose his mind to the Curse, to a degree where she decided that it would be best if he were mercy killed and be left alone in the world. And I sure hope she never witnessed Rosaly’s execution.

And yet she never complains or cries. She sells potions to Hector and hosts his Devils with a gentle smile, supporting him all the way through.

Ngl, I’d so cut that whole conversation between St. Germain and Zead that Hector overhears, and replace it with one between Julia and Isaac 😭 let them talk! I want to see Julia try to reach out to Isaac, only to be cruelly rejected, and Hector could get a glimpse of her true sadness behind her cute, slightly brusque mask.

I don’t feel like either Hector or Julia are, by the end of CoD, in a healthy place to start a romantic relationship. Julia looks too much like Rosaly, and is the sister of Hector’s friend-turned-enemy. Hector killed Isaac, even though Julia felt it was the best course of action. It’s a situation that spells disaster. But I really wish they’ll be able to heal together, and that Julia will open up more.

[dykepaldi]

homestuck was so perfect for autistic teenagers bc it took characters being sorted into categories and having Attributes to its absolute extreme. forget four hogwarts houses, every character has their associated colour their zodiac sign their associated animal their dream planet their god tier class and aspect their typing quirk their pesterchum handle their weapon their planet of x and y, as well as each of them having a handful of other very quantifiable Personality Traits and Interests (e.g. this one is a clown this one is angry this one likes fashion this one is just rufio from hook for some reason) and THEN they all also have their respective ancestors and dancestors(?)(plucked that word from my memory) who have all of those things as WELL

and god not to mention the fucking quadrant system

as a 13-15 year old autistic kid i didnt even need homestuck to have a plot i just happily made a big big spreadsheet of character attributes in my brain

[dykedvonte]

Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.

We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.

Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.

He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?

I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?

[blue-mood-blue]

I have been thinking about the blackening (as one does)…

…and it’s so interesting to me, the penalty Shen Qingqiu is faced with should he not decide to yeet his disciple into hell.

Account termination. Instant death. Sent directly home to his already-long-dead body, and that’s it for the villain of the piece who outright refuses his villainy. The protagonist needs a blackening for the story to continue, and Shen Qingqiu is going to provide it or get written out of the narrative. Either way, Luo Binghe is going to lose him. Either way, this is a turning point.

I wouldn’t claim that this is the intent of the penalty, but it fascinates me that the System has, potentially, backed the plotline into a corner - because Binghe still stands to be blackened even if Shen Qingqiu took the other choice.

Think about what that would look like, to him. He’s at the Immortal Alliance Conference, and everything is going wrong. He’s been outed as a demon, and not just a demon - the top tier of demon, as bad as it gets from the perspective of a righteous cultivator. His beloved teacher, the person who has been kindest to him and opened his home and heart to him, is standing there with his sword in hand, deciding what he’s going to do about what must look, to him, like a horrific betrayal. Binghe is apologizing. Binghe is begging for his life.

Shen Qingqiu hears him. Maybe it shows on his face, or in his voice, that he already knew; maybe there’s no hint at all, but Shen Qingqiu is suddenly talking quickly with an abrupt sense of urgency that Luo Binghe is having a hard time keeping up with. Telling him he’ll be wonderful - telling him he’s the best. Telling him the world will be his, with emotions cracking through that aloof mask that Binghe has never seen on Shizun’s face before, and it’s terrifying for reasons that Binghe cannot identify.

(He will, later. When he has time to think, he’ll realize it sounded like a goodbye.)

And then Shen Qingqiu is bleeding. And then Shen Qingqiu is on the ground. And then Shen Qingqiu is dead. There’s no countdown for Binghe - there’s no System, there’s no warning, there’s no answers.

Luo Binghe is a heavenly demon in the middle of a conference sabotaged by demons. Luo Binghe is alone. His fellow competing disciples are scattered, some dead or injured. The Peak Lord of Qing Jing Peak, the second in command of Cang Qiong Mountain Sect, maybe the only person he loved and who loved him back, is dead at his feet. No one will believe him if he says it isn’t his fault.

(He can’t believe it isn’t his fault.)

What choice does he have but to run? The last heavenly demon the cultivation world went up against has been sealed under a mountain for years, and one of the people responsible for that is probably looking for Shen Qingqiu already. They’ll be looking for him, too. There isn’t anywhere to hide; there isn’t any time to mourn.

There isn’t even enough time to ask why. Why again.

There is no closure waiting for him, because there is nothing to explain what happened. It just is.

It would be a different kind of blackening, certainly - less intense, probably, less of a warping, desperate thing. But how many times can one person have all the love and safety in their world torn out from under them before it starts to show? Before they just don’t allow things like love and safety to touch them, because that’s the better option?

Interesting to consider that, simply by offering the choices it did, the System rigged the story to guarantee that Luo Binghe would end up in hell (deliberate or not).

Interesting to consider that, even if Shen Qingqiu made what might have seemed like a kinder choice, there was every chance it wouldn’t have been.

[chloesimaginationthings]

Happy Birthday!!

TYSM FOR ALL THE BIRTHDAY WISHES! YOU GUYS ARE TOO KIND 😭💜

[mayhemspreadingguy]

(tits out and ready to get hurt again 💔😭)

[hanjlsung]

endless hanji gifs 1/♡ for @strayklds ♡

[kimdokjas]

We are alive. And we will continue living. So long as you remain by my side.

[justplaggin]

so. the new bsd stage sure is something

[webonchin]

"A dream date"

Happy Dreamling Day!!!!! Wanted to make something cute because I love them sm!!!

[ruporas]

hello there, angel

[ID: Digital illustration in color of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun Maximum. Vash is sitting facing the viewer and holds a rose between his clasped together hands, but he’s looking to the left, upwards, at Wolfwood, with an awed expression. Wolfwood hovers over him with wings sprouting from his back. He has a cigarette lit between his lips, his arms and legs are crossed, and he looks back at Vash with a neutral expression. The both of them are covered in a blue shadow, casted by Wolfwood and his hovering form, while warm light hits the back of his wings and over Vash’s legs. Small feathers sits next to Vash. End ID]

[yardsards]

hot take but you all NEED to stop telling people to kill themselves.

yes, even *those* people. i don't care if you're talking to some monster who puts live puppies into a wood chipper for fun, don't say that shit.

because mx. puppychipper isn't gonna be affected by your words.

but you know who might be affected? some innocent third party reading the words you said on a public website.

because telling people to kill themselves says "suicide is a punishment for being a bad person. bad people, upon realizing they're bad, should simply commit suicide instead of working to atone for their actions."

and that is NOT a message you wanna be normalizing to anyone, but ESPECIALLY people with depression (who, let's be real, make up a higher than average chunk of this site's userbase). whose mental illness is already telling them that 1: they're an inherently terrible worthless person no matter what they do 2: death is an appealing option.

is reading "kill yourself" once or twice gonna make them do it? nah, probably not. but reading it multiple times a day every day is gonna make their mental health worse. it's probably not good for your mental health to be saying that kind of thing, either.

just knock that shit off. the world is already so hostile to people with mental illness, and managing mental illness and unlearning unhealthy thought patterns is already so difficult. you don't need to be out here making it worse.

[vonlipwig]

I think what people don't tell you about mental illness is that Recovery™️ is something you have to work at forever. If you Get The Metnal Ilness, it's like someone dug an endless pit in your garden and, once you've managed to climb out of it, you still have to spend the rest of your life avoiding it. And there'll be long stretches where you forget the endless pit is there - you haven't looked at it in forever - avoiding it is easy. And then some days, seemingly without warning, you'll wake up on the edge of it and you'll spend days, weeks even, staring down it - consumed by it - wondering if you'll fall down it again; wondering whether it'd be easier to just... step into the black. And it's so, so hard to turn your back on it. Because you know it won't be the last time.

It's like. Recovery won't ever fill in the endless pit. The endless pit will always be there. Recovery is spending your life trying to avoid falling down it again.

[thefrogdalorian]

I was watching Chapter 15: The Believer yesterday and something stood out to me that I guess I'd never really thought about before...

When the Juggernaut is getting attacked by the Pirates, we see several shots of Din struggling without his armour. It's a new way of fighting for him and he struggles to adapt at first.

He quickly rallies and skilfully fights them off, though. But more pirates soon appear and after fighting them off, Din is thrown backwards. He sees several pirates approaching.

Din lies down in defeat, powerless to fight them off without his armour or weapons. Knowing his death is likely imminent, without hope of survival.

Instead of giving up and accepting defeat, he does not allow himself to wallow in despair and mystery. After sighing deeply he steadies himself and gets right back up:

Facing down death as the pirates approach, he does not show weakness or fear.

He doesn't allow himself to be cowardly, or dwell on his likely impending doom and the fact he has failed in his quest to rescue the child he loves so much...

Instead, Din stands there with his fists up, outnumbered and without weapons, prepared to fight to the end even in the face of certain death...

Fortunately, of course, the TIE Fighters appear to save the day and Din succeeds in his quest to rescue Grogu and, well, you know the rest.

But I think this little moment in one of the best episodes is such a good insight into his character.

Standing up with his fists clenched like that, outnumbered and hopeless but refusing to accept defeat is perhaps one of the most Mandalorian things he's ever done. Yet only a few minutes later he removes his helmet and that act leaves him rendered an apostate in the eyes of his people. Told he is a Mandalorian no more, even.

It's kind of heartbreaking because he really did not deserve to be told that. Mandalorians are proud warriors, who never give up. Being a coward is the worst insult in Mando'a, their ancient language. Here, Din showed that he is nothing of the sort.

Din Djarin is as honourable a Mandalorian as they come.

[darlingcloudie-9]

oough………. my babies………….. i care for them very much 🌸

[sneverussape]

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