#i have drawn like. just a character in pencil in so long!! felt good

[spaceistheplaceart]

Body Swap - How Do I Talk Like That? Part Four

masterpost

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Summarized ID: Mob talks to Reigen about his fear of not being able to socialize properly, that he isn't making connections or can't make the first move. He wonders what it would be like to make the first move, and pictures Tsubomi. Reigen puts a hand on his shoulder and listens.

FULL ID UNDER CUT:

(This is a body swap, so I'll be referring to the characters as who they actually are but keep in mind that Reigen is in Mob's body and vice versa.)

Mob looks down, a dull yet sad expression on his face. He says, "It's not that. I've just been thinking. Even though I'm better at it now, I think, I still have trouble talking to others. I feel like everyone else knows what to say, or at the least can make themselves understood."

A grayscale panel shows a flashback to when Mob gave his speech to become student council president, he is on stage, silent, frozen. Mob continues speaking, "but even when I have a script, I freeze up."

Reigen is looking at Mob with furrowed brows and his lips set into a thin line. Mob continues, "Master, I know you said I don't need to be like other people, but..."

A shot of Mob and Reigen sitting on the curb. Dimple floats next to Mob. "I'm afraid if I can't 'get it' now," Mob looks downwards again with a worried expression. "That I won't be able to socialize properly when I'm older."

Dimple grins. "Come on, you don't need to worry about that stuff yet! You've got plenty of friends don't you?" He flexes his arms, drawn behind him are radial rays of light. "What about Tome? And the Body Improvement Club!"

Mob smiles slightly. "It's true. I do have a lot of friend, and I'm very grateful that I'm surrounded by such good people." His smile drops. "But sometimes, I feel like..."

Shown are a series of grayscale flashbacks all in one long panel. The first scene is of Tome, talking excitedly while holding Mob's hands in hers. He looks slightly taken aback, but is listening. They're sitting at a desk. The next is Mob sitting next to Emi on a grassy hill, holding her writing. The final one is Mob, flexing, while one of his Body Improvement Club friends feels his muscle excitedly. Mob is smiling shakily, blushing slightly, and sweating. He says, "I'm not connecting with them properly. Whenever we talk, I always let them take the lead, I became complacent. It felt easier that way."

Another grayscale flashback, showing Mob at his desk in school, looking over and watching two of his classmates talk happily. One of them is a girl with big curly hair, sitting at her desk, and another is a boy with short spiky hair who's leaning on her desk and talking to her. Mob says, "And everyone that I know now, I only know them because they spoke to me first. I've never gone up to someone and became their friend because of my own efforts."

This page shows a glittery thought bubble, picturing Tsubomi. Tsubomi is smiling widely with cute, big, shiny eyes. She's turning around to face the viewer, her hair and skirt. flowing out from the motion. She has her arms tucked behind her back. She's blushing, and is shaded with soft pencil scratches. The background is gray and pink with sparkles and big glowing circles. She's illuminated in white. She has a cowlick shaped into a heart. Mob looks up at his thought bubble, slightly blushing, and says, "If I were to try and make the first move, I wonder..."

Reigen claps a hand on Mob's shoulder. "Mob. Listen," He says.

END ID.

[catherinekal]

Giant Fucking List of Obscure Video Games I Recommend!

It's finally done!! Took me long enough, but here it is. Over 50 games I recommend. Just in time for the Steam Sale. Holy shit I spent way to much time on this.

Some of these are well known to anyone into the indie/AA gaming scene or just on the internet often, but I still felt the need to mention in case people haven't heard of them. All of these are obscure compared to any AAA game and I'm confident no one would have heard or played all of these.

They all have something I found interesting in someway. I was going to include a trailer for each game, but apparently Tumblr doesn't like that. So I have put a link to a Youtube playlist for all of them in the same order as this list. Some of these games are also on various consoles to, but I can confirm they're all on Steam beyond one.

I only picked games I've played personally. I know of many other good obscure games, but haven't tried or bought them yet so they don't get on the list. Also many games on this list remain unfished to me, but that's more due to time and other life shit then them getting bad.

There's a lot of fucking games In this list so hopefully you find something you've never tried before and give it a shot. All these games are on Steam with one exception, but that's a free game. I also organized them by genres that make perfect sense to me.

Trailers Link:

The Best Game Ever:

Outer Wilds

Fuck it let's just start with the only mandatory game on this list you need to play. You know how nearly every space game is a overpromised underdelivered fucking mess? Like all of them.

Outer Wilds is the actual good one. Don't want to say much more then that. This is very much an experience that you need to know as little as possible to get the best experience. Not even linking the trailer in the playlist.

Absolutely play this game if you had to pick only 1 thing on this list.

EarthBoundLikes:

OMORI

OMORI is a game about a group of kids who go on magical adventures and save the day. That's it. Nothing else sinister going on here.

It's a well known indie game and for good reason. It's fucking good. One of my favorite games of all time.

Art style is peak. A mix of pixel and pencil drawn art that works so damn well for me. The battle system is turn based and revolves around changing emotions and teamwork. It mixes a happy child like vibe with a darkness underneath it, which is right up my alley. A tale of trauma and grief. I'm still fucked up thinking about some story bits in there. 

All the characters are wonderful and the story is helped a lot by keeping it focused on a small group of friends.

Play it.

LISA: The Painful and LISA: The Joyful

LISA: The Painful/Joyful are a pair of games that fuck. They fuck hard.

They're morbid, tackle many taboos, and have a dark but also stupid sense of humor. The visuals are nothing groundbreaking, but this isn't a game that needs perfect pristine pixel art. The combat system is a lot of fun, but takes very clear inspiration from Earthbound. The story is just perfect though.

You play Brad whos on a journey to rescue his adoptive daughter who was kidnapped in a post apocalyptic world of only men. You meet the strangest allies and the game has a lot of odd characters in it. Want a lawyer fish in your party? This game has it.

It does not shy away from throwing punches and is not for anyone who can't handle a story that tackles themes of abuse, depression, suicide, and more. The game also has a sequel I don't want to say to much about, but it's absolutely worth it as well.

If you want a fun and fucked up 2D RPG adventure and somehow haven't played this then please do so.

Mandatory Metroidvania Soulslike Indie Game Darlings:

Ender Lilies: Quietus of the Knights

Ender Lilies is the first of many metroidvania's on this list. The indie scene is filled with them and for good reason. The formula works so damn well.

What I love about Ender Lilies is the concept of the player character. You play a white priestess who is also a child and helpless on her own. However, you can summon the spirits of allies and slain enemies to fight for you and those spirits are all your attacks. Gameplay is the same as any other Metroidvania, but knowing I'm this helpless child in this world infected by blight really sells me on the setting.

There's nothing revolutionary to this entry in the pantheon of Metroidvanias, but the visuals and setting are why I recommend it. This game is a slow descent into hell. Also you do get a big heavy hammer attack and any game with a big hammer weapon attack is a good game. Big bonks.

Craving a Metroidvania with a macabre setting? This will do it.

GRIME

GRIME is something else. I don't hear anyone talk about this game and it's a damn shame. I don't even know how to even describe GRIMEs setting. You play as essentially a sentient black hole on a rock body. You go through, with lore slowly revealed as is the Metroidvania stable, and absorb your enemies.

This games aesthetic is best described as fleshy stone. It's very unique visually and what made me want to try it out. As for gameplay you'll need to learn parrying as this games combat system heavily relies on it.

This game surprised me and has a entire level I never expected with one very unique boss to top that off. Also be warned. This game is very much a platformer as well. Similar to how the Ori games are, not just pure combat challenges. If you like your metroidvanias with little to no platforming then you won't enjoy parts of this game, but nothing as difficult as things in Hollow Knight.

If you enjoy metroidvanias then this is a must play. More people need to talk about it.

Salt and Sanctuary

This is where it all started. Certainly not the first Metroidvania by any means, but the first 2D Soulslike Metroidvania or at the least first advertised as such. The devs intended to make Dark Souls in 2D and they did it. Before Hollow Knight, the games listed above, or so many others that took inspirations from Souls in the 2D world, was this game. I know this game was popular with the souls community as it came out, but I don't really hear about it anymore. Hollow Knight just dominated all discussion.

The controls and combat are very much Dark Souls but in 2D. The lore is cryptic and hidden away. There's a fuckton of weapons and spells and multiple playthroughs worth of stuff. The game is hard though Hollow Knight would easily one up it in terms of difficulty.

This game also has covenants that are actually good and the mechanics around them are vastly improved over any souls game that has covenants. I won't go into detail, but I wish the souls games copied this games mechanics for that.

The setting is high fantasy with the lovely dark bloody horror underneath it all. The art style can turn people away, it's not as pretty as other 2D souslikes, but I enjoy it personally. It fits.

The game has a lot to explore and you can get lost in its world pretty easily. I remember walking into a boss room from the exit somehow and got behind the boss and it was all intended if you navigated around him.

If you can appreciate or just get past the visuals and want to see where the 2D soulslike genre began then you should play it.

Metroidvania's Before the Dark Age of Soulslikes

Dust: An Elysian Tail

Long ago there was a time where Metroidvanais didn't have soulslike mechanics defaulted in and set in these bleak post apocalyptic worlds. I have 3 of them to recommend. Starting With Dust: An Elysian Tail

This is a fun little game. A game that I'm not sure many people know about or would think to play today. Metroidvanias pre Hollow Knight tend to get forgotten when I see people about them now. It has a mix of platforming and hectic combat. I remember the game having a cool spin sword attack with a even cooler aerial attack. I liked it a lot when I played it many many years ago.

The art style is colorful and everyone is an anthropomorphic animal. More games need anthropomorphic animals beyond catgirl or rabbitgirl, seriously I grew up on shit like sly Cooper and Ratchet and Clank.

You play as Dust and are accompanied by Fidget. you got a magic sword and you kill a bunch of shit while saving the day. Just a fun little Metroidvania that doesn't overstay and go on forever.

It may be dated in some ways, but if you're a fan of these types of games and want to play a older one then here you go.

Guacamelee!

The combat in this game feel great. Another little forgotten gem of a Metroidvania. It has such a unique style to it and has a fun cartoony vibe. It's pretty fucking great.

You play as a farmer who dons a luchador mask to save his friend he loves and the world being taken over. The combat is a mix of punches, kicks, and throws which is unique from the usual swords and magic these types of games tend to default to. As the game goes along enemies will have shields that need certain moves to break and you'll be switching from the land of the dead and living in combat and platforming.

Both this and Dust before it don't reinvent the genre or anything, but have their own unique charms that I recommend them both if you're a fan of Metroidvanias.

Cave Story+

This is a old classic. The original Cave Story came out in 2004, and was released with a enhanced version in 2011. This is a must play Metroidvania and an old gem. It's the oldest game on this list technically.

This game has little to no melee combat, but instead goes all in on using guns. More Metroid then Vania in that sense. What's unique to the combat is enemies will drop experience that will level up your guns automatically. Each gun can be upgraded to 3 levels, but when you take damage you lose experiences and levels. This adds a extra layer or rewards and punishment to getting hit that I like. Your weapons are perfectly usable at level 1 so it's not like you're fucked, but it gives a greater incentive to avoid damage.

It has fun characters and and fun gameplay. It's a genuine indie gem that I think everyone should play.

Pixel Action Adventure Games With A Dash of RPG Elements to Taste:

ANNO: Mutationem

This game is a pixel art cyberpunk adventure. I adore the art style. It's a 2.5D action platformer set in a futuristic setting. You're on a quest to save your brother with the help of your hacker friend/girlfriend. A quest which leads to a far more complicated story.

The story in this game goes off the rails in ways I love, but I know it threw people off. People have compared the latter half to Evangelion and It can be confusing to follow at times. I still highly recommend it, even if you get lost near the end. A simpler story in terms of Lore would have worked better, but I say fuck it. Go all in.

To me the appeal of this game is the setting. A fascinating cyberpunk sci-fi setting shown through wonderful pixel art. Just walking around the various cities was a joy on its own. There's a lot of attention to detail and I think it's worth playing for that alone. Combat is your standard side-scrolling Metroidvaniaish kind of stuff with various weapons and upgrades and all that. I found it a little challenging at times, but this isn't a game meant for extreme difficulty from what I remember.

If you want to play as hot badass woman in a cyberpunk setting given life through detailed pixel art, then this is the game for you.

CrossCode

This is the most dense indie game on this whole list. CrossCode has so much to do. The game is expansive and slowly drip feeds you with more. You have 5 skill trees, 4 of which are tied to an element, multiple upgrade paths in them. You have a mix of melee combat with twin stick shooter mechanics thrown in. The game has multiple dungeons with puzzles that are both difficult to figure out and then execute the solution for. These aren't like a 2D Zelda dungeon where things never get to complicated, I really took a lot of time with every dungeon.

The setting takes place on another moon physically, but its actually all virtual and a MMO people are playing from all over the galaxy. Though the game itself isn't a MMO really. You play as a set character in a set linear story that's unrelated to that actual in lore story of the MMO. 

The characters are fun and the setting is a joy to explore. There's a lot of side content and I don't remember any of it being a drag. This games also challenging and I know It took me a bit to progress at various points. The pixel art is very detailed, especially with the outdoor environments.

This game will keep you engaged for a while and there's challenging DLC and even fun incentives to play new game plus. This is just all around a solid game experience.

Hyper Light Drifter

I played this game a long time ago so details are hazy, but I know I really enjoyed it. It's top down and filled with action. You got a sword. You got a gun. You go kill things and I do remember many challenging combat encounters.

I have forgotten all story elements, but even now I still remember some imagery that reminded me of Evangelion, which is always a plus. Though story was never the main draw to games for me so the setting and combat were all I needed to keep engaged.

Not the most descriptive review of the game, but I know this is one of the furthest game on this list from when I played it and I only went through it once. It's a cool game though and if the trailer enticed you then you owe it to yourself to get it. 

Phoenotopia: Awakening

I adore this little hidden gem of a game. If CrossCode is the most dense indie game on this list then this is a very close second. Possibly even more dense, I truly can't decide for sure. It's cute, funny, charming, and full of legitimate challenges.

You play as Gail who lives in a small town village. Some shit happens that I won't give away, but you end needing to travel the land and go on a fun adventure. The story is full of comedic and lively characters. It never takes itself to seriously or gets really dark which Is a nice change of pace.

This game really is an adventure. You will travel a lot and get very familiar with any hub area. There's secrets and puzzles packed all over and gives you good reason to revisit. A nice drip feed of progress is felt as you unlock more stuff.

In terms of combat it's bar far the most simplistic on this list and could even frustrate others, but like everything else in this game it has charm and I adore it. The simple mechanics don't mean no challenge though. I was stuck often, but felt so satisfying when I won.

Some of the late game areas can be bullshit and will frustrate you, but stick with it. This is a genuine top tier hidden indie gem that got no attention. Honestly just under Outer Wilds this would be the other must buy. Absolutely play this.

Vampire Survivorlikes:

20 Minutes Till Dawn

Everyone knows about Vampire Survivor and everyone knows many games came out that tried to capture that style of gameplay. This one is the only one of those I've played and it's wonderful.

You unlock multiple characters and multiple guns with various upgrade trees. Kill the horde, survive, upgrade, survive even longer. Each level only takes 20 minutes, hence the title. I appreciate that as the game would never end with how strong you end up being by the end after you learn the mechanics.

This isn't anything groundbreaking, but if you need to kill half a hour then it's a fun thing to play.

Hawklikes:

Umurangi Generation

Let's fucking go!! This game rules!

As someone who is going to pursue photography more seriously as a hobby this game is perfect. Unlike something like Pokemon Snap or games with photo modes, this game really captures the feeling of holding a physical camera and the moment to moment decisions you make with each shot.

You unlock different lenses and control each shot as you would a real camera. After each photo you can edit it on the spot purely for your own creative reasons. The visuals are low poly and very colorful.

The game has a tony hawk style of progression. A hawklike if you will. You get dropped in a level and are given a list of photos to try and take. You can of course take photos of anything. You have a limited amount of film and can find more throughout the level.

Also there's a story. There's a dark undercurrent to the whole thing and the game is very overtly political in all the right ways. Don't like politics in your games? Fuck you! This game dives right in while still maintaining the core gameplay loop. Need more games like this please.

Please buy this game and it's DLC.

Action Games:

Furi

Top tier action game. It's a boss rush game, that's it. 10 bosses with some vague story that briefly connects them. It's not bloated with bullshit and knows exactly what to focus on.

The combat is a mix of intense melee combat with parries and dodges and the like, with twin stick shooting. No upgrades. No farming. No choosing between this weapon or that. No additional moves or mechanics. You fight a tutorial boss which teaches you everything and then you go. You have the full toolkit from the start and that lets you master it slowly over the game.

It's so fucking satisfying finally winning and knowing you improved and earned that win. I like the story as well. It's not that complex, but the ending bits worked for me.

If you want a genuine good action game that has no bullshit attached then get this.

Amid Evil

There's not much to say about this one other then it's really fucking fun. It's a first person action game where you use magic and weapons to go through combat filled levels. You have health and mana that all weapons use outside of your axe. The levels are filled with secrets, you move fast, and it's just a fun action game.

Sometimes a game isn't more then that and it beats games that are stuffed with unnecessary mechanical bloat. If you want a fun first person action game that's not just a full shooter then this is the game for you.

Adventure Games:

The Cat Lady and Lorelai

I love these games. No one ever talks about them or knows about them and they will certainly linger in your mind. The devs have made 2 other games that I have yet to get to so for now I am recommending only these.

Play The Cat Lady first. It's the first one and tells the story of a very depressed middle aged woman who gets a second chance at life, at a cost.

Lorelai is about a young woman in a very abusive household trying to survive while seeing what lengths she will go to save those she loves.

Both these games revolve around deals with a devil and feature a lot of horrific violence. Fun!

The stories in both evoke a creepy disturbing feeling and you're always on edge. I won't say these are straight horror games, but they sure use horror imagery. The art style really helps sells it. The animations or character models may not be the most beautiful thing around, but it has that indie charm I love. The voice acting isn't perfect either, but these aren't negatives for me. These are passion projects and imperfections are what make any piece of art shine brighter. Real people put their soul into these games and it shows.

The gameplay is standard adventure game fair, but all keyboard controlled. So no endless mouse clicking everything on the screen. which works wonderfully. Though being pure adventure games you're here more for the story then the moment to moment gameplay.

Please play these.

Detention

Detention is probably well known due to the controversy with Red Candle Games other game, Devotion being wiped online for shitty reasons. It's available now on their own websites store, though I still have never played it. I should one day as Detention was pretty fucking good.

The gameplay is the usual 2D adventure game fair. A lot of clicking and puzzle solving with some horror thrown in. The story and setting are where it's at though.

The game is unique in that it's made from Taiwanese devs and the games setting is rooted in their cultures history. I don't want to give away any real details beyond that, but it certainly left an impact and seeing a game not set in Europe, America, Japan, or any fantasy equivalent to those was refreshing. The games also not super long and could easily be beaten in a day.

Go buy it. Play it on a long free night. Support these devs.

Rime

I love the aesthetic of this game. Cel shading indie colorful goodness. I got this for the visuals alone and was very happy the game that came with it was good to. Visuals are a major factor in me getting interested in a game and the reveal trailer was enough for me to play it.

It's very light and cryptic on story for most of it as to be expected from this kind of game. You're a kid, you wake up on a beach and go forth exploring. You solve puzzles and hide from danger and go through each of the unique levels trying to piece together whats going on.

Like the game before, this isn't a super long one. Shouldn't take more then a day or a few to get through it all. Though I do recommend you take your time and explore like I did. Let yourself be immersed in the setting.

This is another example of just a pure perfect indie game. Doesn't overstay it's welcome, tells a simple but cryptic story, and has lovely visuals.

Atominous

This is the one of the few games on this whole list that I would say is truly obscure. In fact I have no doubt this is the most obscure. If you're big into indie games then nothing on this list will honestly surprise you, but I'm confident this is the exception.

In this free game you place as a a little guy who's job is like pest control. Instead of bugs your job is to collect and protect the world from rare atoms called Atominous. Basically little atoms that can alter reality. You go into a big house and your job is to find them through the power of puzzle solving and clicking every little thing you see.

This game is all about clicking everything. Nearly every object has unique text that pops up, if not multiple. You find keys to open more of the house and slowly suck up the atominous atoms and clean up the place.

That's it. It's a fun quirky little free game that shouldn't take more then a couple hours. No excuse not to try it, it's free. It's also the only game not on steam, but instead here

Adventure Games Where You Hit Things:

TUNIC

TUNIC is a lovely indie game. You play as a little cute fox and go on a adventure to save your poor trapped mom. such a cute game :3

I adore the visuals, I love low poly stuff and the game is full of charm. Looking at this game makes me happy. The game is like a mix of a top down Zelda and Fez and it being reminiscent of FEZ was what really took me by surprise. I won't go further in how it's like FEZ, but it really elevated the game for me.

It's a fun top down game with simple fun combat. You kill enemies, find key items, unlock more of the world, and get fed cryptic lore. The perfect formula for a fun little indie game. The game is decently challenging to with it's boss fights, and overall a nice fun little experience with some neat surprises.

TUNIC is wonderful, go play it.

Kena: Bridge of Sprits

This is the most PS2 game I've played since the PS2. I mean that as a compliment. This game felt like going back in time to a simpler time.

Visually the game is not at all like the PS2. The visuals are beautiful and has been compared to Pixar. It's bright, colorful, and well polished. To me this is peak aesthetics. This game is worth playing just to see all the work that went into the game's visuals alone.

It reminded me of a PS2 game because it's a self contained fun third person action adventure. Just a fun game with no bullshit holding it down or any other purpose then being a fun adventure. The world is a joy to explore with a nice steady progression. I especially love how the Hub is mostly corrupted and you slowly restore it over the course of the game. Shit like that always feels so good.

There's a lot of unexpected challenge to. Some of the later fights and especially bosses took me a bit to beat. Just like a PS2 game you'll get random difficulty spikes that are so fucking satisfying to beat.

I highly recommend this game.

Adventure Games Where You're in the Desert:

Sable

Sable is a coming of age story presented in a very fun interactive package. This is a game about heading out into the world and exploring on your own whim to figure out what your character becomes as an adult.

You play as Sable, a young adult girl who has to leave her tribe and head into the wider world to discover herself. The goal is to find mask which representative a life path and pick one by the end. The actual game is about heading into a desert open world, solving puzzles, helping NPC's, and discovering what bits of hidden lore hide throughout. You do this all on a hoverbike you can customize as you unlock more parts.

As always the art style is important to me and this game has something really unique. The characters animation is low framerate and it can be off putting to some, but of course I loved it as I love any odd creative choice. I love the lighting and colors to. It's hard to describe just why I was so mesmerised by the art style, but I can safely say it's one of my all time favorites.

The only negative goes to technical issues. The game ran like shit on my PC and my PC isn't bad. Even people with far better PC's then me ran into frame rate issues and others didn't have any. Sometimes games aren't optimized well, but this game was so magical to me that I loved it, despite the tech issues.

It's a very chill game. You want to explore a cool world at a slow pace and get lost in it? Sable's the game for you.

It Comes In Waves

This is a short game where you have to start over if you die. A penalty I feared, but truthfully this isn't that difficult of an experience. You start on one end of a desert and have to carry something to the other end as it grows inside a tank on your back.

As you wait for whatever your transporting to grow you will explore minimalist environments with some unique imagery that speaks of a wider history you just have to wonder about. The whole time you have to watch out for raiders and watch your water level. It always depletes and you will need to explore and refill it as you journey on. I also love how you have a map, but the map is like an actual map. It doesn't show you on it, but just the overall area.

This game will take you a hour at best and is unlike anything else on this list. There's something about just slowly walking across the desert, not knowing what's ahead, and hoping you can make it to the next water tank. Just a little experimental game about a harsh journey.

Platformers With 2 Entire Dimensions:

MO: Astray

Ever wanted to play as a little blob? No? Well you should because this game was a hidden gem. I was thrown off by this game at first and then pleasantly surprised by the whole experience.

This game feels like it should be a metroidvania. It's 2D and you're on a broken down ship or facility or something. Nope. This game is fully linear and at first I didn't think I'd like that and was disappointed, but it works so damn well.

You play a slime essentially and you have the magical power to read the last thoughts and minds of corpses by settling on their rotten fleshy head. With this power and other little story tidbits you learn what's going on, your purpose, and so on.

There's no combat in this game really. You move by shooting yourself in any direction you can see and you can stick to surfaces. There's danger. There's enemies. There's boss fights. All without the usual fair of attack/dodge roll, that's standard for 2D metroidvanias now. This game is something different and that alone makes it worth it.

Also a note on the boss fights. All of them felt very unique from each other I prefer having a few well crafted unique bosses then having a bunch of the same type of fight over and over again.

Another genuine hidden gem you should try.

Platformers With 3 Entire Dimensions:

Frogun

Frogun is adorable. It's like a N64 game and I love it.

You have a frog grappling hook and go through little short levels that ramp up in difficulty. There's optional challenges in each one. The art style is absolutely going for that early 3D low poly vibe that is starting to become more popular.

This is a perfect example of just a fun video game for the sake of being a fun video game. No serious story or message or intense complicated gameplay mechanics. Just a cute 3D platformer reminiscent of a older time.

Also I played this back when I used to stream and a Frogun speedrunner showed up in chat and helped me pull off a couple speedrunning tricks so that was fun.

If you want something simple and fun then here it is.

Cyber Hook

The ultimate speedrunning game. You have a gun, a grappling hook, and the ability to slow down time. This is a pure platformer. You enter levels with the goal of getting through as fast as you can.

I never got great at it, but the few times I really got going fast and flew through a level felt awesome. It's so satisfying finally doing things right after many failures and you will fail a lot.

There's really not much more to it. Neat visuals with satisfying and simple mechanics. If that sounds fun to you then check it out.

Marble It Up! Ultra

Platformers really are just the perfect mechanic to make fun mindless games with. Marble It Up! Ultra is another simple 3D platformer that's just purely focused on being fun.

As always it's not that complicated either. You're a marble and you try to reach the end of each stage with a time limit. There's items to stop time, make you jump higher, and go faster. Just all about building up speed and there's tons of ways to skip past parts of levels. Like the two games before, this one is perfect for speedrunning.

It's fun, go buy it.

RPG's:

Roadwarden

I was going to make a big post about why I preferred this to BG3, but scrapped it. BG3 is fun, but the story just bores me from the get go. Where BG3 failed for me Roadwarden succeeded. All story and all fantastic.

This is a text based RPG. Very simplistic visuals which show just enough to let your imagination handle most of the work.

You play a roadwarden who has the lovely job to travel the dangerous roads and help the townsfolk all while working on your greater goals. You pick between 3 starting classes and those do change how you approach things quite a bit. You have a time limit and that will force you to prioritize things over others. You can't do everything in a single playthrough. Your decisions matter and you aren't going to figure everything out.

You have to manage your health, money, hunger, and cleanliness. You will never have enough money for everything and that helps create more interesting choices. You have to manage what you do in a day. You meet a lot of people and forge allies or enemies and it's all told with stellar writing.

If you want a well written fantasy interactive story then you must play this game.

RPG's With Intense High-Octane Turn Based Combat:

Epic Battle Fantasy 5

A long time ago in times forgotten there existed these ancient relics called Flash games. Maybe one day I'll talk about old flash games I was into, but for now I'm only talking about the latest instalment in one of them. Epic Battle Fantasy is a series of games made by Matt Roszak. They started as little flash games, but have since turned into bigger games that are on Steam. 5 is the latest one and also the best so I'm recommending this one.

I've gone through this game multiple times. This game fucking rules. The game is easy to control, satisfying, and has my favorite turn based combat system period. No seriously, this is my favorite turn based combat system. I could go on what I like about it so much, but I'll spare you all most of the details. I'll say it gets rid of mana entirely and put all your abilities on cooldowns which changes based on what you're using. This just fixes balancing and helps you from spamming heals and all that. I love this system. It's easy to control, intuitive to understand, full of options, and can have a chaotic randomness I enjoy.

In this game you explore the overworld, solve puzzles, and fight enemies. The story is not at all serious or anything like that. It may not be a Flash game anymore, but it still has the older internet spirit of not taking things to seriously and being a little juvenile. There's also a lot of post game challenges that still are impossible for me to really do well or at all.

You can change the difficulty anytime and another thing I love is the entire game can be controlled with just a mouse. You can use a keyboard to, but a mouse covers everything which I think is neat.

This is such a wonderful combat system and the game I've beaten most on this list. If you want legitimately challenging turn based RPG combat and don't care about story or characters to get that then this game is a must play.

Shadows Over Loathing

Want a lovecraftian mystery RPG injected with a dose of comedy where everybody is a stick figure? Yes? How very specific, but luckily there's a game just for you.

Shadows Over Loathing is a turn based RPG where you search for your missing uncle in a area full of strange locations and characters. I never did play their other game West of Loathing, and I was pleasantly surprised by this one. It was a lot of fun, creative, difficult at times, and had a world I really wanted to explore.

It has a lighthearted comedic tone throughout and the silly art and stick figure characters help with that. The actual turn based combat is fun to. Nothing to complicated but could be challenging to which is needed to help this style of combat really shine.

There's really not much more to it. If this sounds like something you'd enjoy then please check it out.

RPG's Fused With A Light Novel:

Ys VIII: Lacrimosa of DANA

AA games still exist! I finally get to talk about Ys. I've played 3 Ys games and I'm going to talk about my favorite one because of the fun gameplay. This is a very unknown franchise that has existed since the 80's and even now the 10th instalment is set to release later this year.

As for why I'm recommending Ys 8, it's because it has some of the most fun gameplay. The combat is fast paced, encourages good timing, and full of that anime over the top stylish action. You control up to 3 characters and can easily switch between them. Each character plays differently and has their own special moves and everything just feels so satisfying.

You play as generic light novel anime man, Adol. Tagging along is generic tsundere light novel anime girl and other light novel anime characters. Like edgy boy with a gun, loli raised in the wild, and blue haired girl. You crash land on a island and have to survive and find survivors. Much like LOST the story goes off the rails and of course in classic JRPG fashion you need to stop the end of the world somehow. Unlike LOST characters are generic and the usual anime fair.

Despite the lackluster story this game still fucking rules because it's so goddamn fun to play. It also solved crafting forever by making it so you can convert common items into rarer ones making anything you find useful potentially. Seriously it's such a nice feature and all crafting systems without it are lesser.

If you want some fun action combat and don't mind anime bullshit then really, check out the entire franchise. Any of them will do, but this is the one I'd recommend the most.

RPG's Fused With A Light Novel and A WW2 Textbook:

Valkyria Chronicles 1 and 4

Picture this. WW2, but with anime and magical girls. Japan just never stops with these incredible ideas.

I adore these 2 games. I haven't played 2 or 3 as those are PSP games and I don't hear great things. However I can confirm 1 and 4 are fucking fantastic.

These games are tactical RPG's where you command troops one by one in missions. Most are usually about capturing a enemy base, but there's a lot of variety beyond that in both of them. You lay out your troops at the start plus your commander who's in the tank. You get a set level of CP per turn and each CP is used to control a unit. The actual game is probably piss easy for experienced tactical game players, but I'm not that at all. I found it legitimately difficult, both games.

What sets it apart is the game turns into a sort of third person shooter when controlling the units. You can freely move up to your AP and get one action to do. If it was just top down the whole time I'd find that not that interesting, but actually moving around and taking cover unit by unit is very engaging. There's 5 classes in the first game and a 6th added in the fourth game. Each class can be upgraded as well along with weapons, equipment, and the tanks.

The stories in both are nothing special truthfully. It's anime WW2 with silly dumb anime characters. I don't mind that and had a lot of fun, but if you can't stand something like Persona then these games will infuriate you. To me stupid anime characters in games can be a lot of fun, like Raz in 4, the dumbest but somehow most entertaining character for me. Expect some silly anime cliches and tone changes and the usual fair for these kinds of games. Even if the story is a big nothing for you, I still think both games are worth it for the gameplay.

Another aspect that I really love is all your units have personality traits that can trigger as you control them. What caught me off guard was that they're both positive and negative ones. There's ones like a woman having man hater and fancies woman as traits, aka the lesbian. There's straight up a guy with misogynist as a trait. Some are lonely, frail, daredevils, have crushes or people they hate, even one with the masochist trait. All these good and bad traits translate into potential buffs or debuffs that can happen in the game.

Sadly these side characters don't get much story in the first game. Just a unique design with some personality traits and maybe a couple in battle lines of dialogue. However, the 4th one introduced squad stories. Essentially little side stories that revolve around the non important squad mates. They were always fun to do and the missions for them are more unique because they are designed around only using those 3 characters.

I recommend both of them, but if you had to play one I'm not sure. 1 has the better story, the overall lore itself establishes in 1, and the gameplay is still fun. 4 has the better gameplay, more unique missions, and the squad stories which were a highlight for me.

Just pick which one sounds more like your thing if you only want to spend the time with one of them. Both are fun.

RPG's About the Harsh Reality of Capitalism:

Recettear: An Item Shop's Tale

I adore this games concept. It takes the common NPC seen in these little RPG adventures, the shopkeeper, and puts you in their shoes. You're father has a big debt to pay off and you now have to sell items out of your house to help pay it off before the deadline.

You lay the items out and then have to haggle your way to a profit. Finding the line of when to haggle and how much is the key to success and I failed miserably. I never did beat this game, but I haven't beaten many games on this list and that won't stop me from telling you to play them. I think the concept alone is enough of a reason to check it out.

The game does have combat as well. You can hire an adventurer to go with you into a dungeon and fight enemies for treasure. I like how you hire someone from the Adventurers Guild, just another cool concept as a typical game would have you play as the character being hired instead all the time. I also like how dungeons are high risk high reward. If they die then you lose most of what you gather and essentially just wasted the day.

It's just a cool concept and a nice change of pace from how a game set in these typical fantasy settings would go. You aren't some savior of the world, but just a shopkeeper trying to pay off debt.

Spooky Games:

Yuppie Psycho

Do you want a game about a corporate building being haunted by dark forces and being a badass fighting your way through it all? That's Control. You just want Control.

Unlike Control which bored me to death after a while. Yuppie Psycho is about a haunted corporate building, but you play a new lowly worker who's been tasked with something far above his pay grade. Brian Pasternack is a new hire who's in way over his head. What should have been a normal corporate jobs turns into a witch hunt, literally.

You aren't a badass and will have to sneak your way to victory, uncovering the buildings hidden secrets along the way. For me that's part of why this works over Control as a effective story. You're kind of a fucking nobody who has to be extra careful and is reluctant to even do this. Far more relatable honestly.

The joy of this game comes from exploring this building and uncovering the secrets and horrors. Each floor is unique and this game gets creative with the corporate horror vibe. I love some of the designs of things and how it blends comedy and horror together. It also has branching paths and even limited save slots which seemed frustrating at first, but wasn't really a big deal. Not saving every chance you can really adds to the tension when sneaking around.

It's not a true horror intense experience, but as someone who is a baby with horror I found a lot of genuine tense moments. It's a real indie gem.

The Complex: Found Footage

Kane Pixels backrooms videos are honestly pretty fucking great. I'm not usually a fan of horror at all, but there's something about these videos that just work for me. Then pgWave decided to make a video game creating the experience of exploring these kinds of spaces.

This is a creepy game where you slowly move through liminal spaces and just sort of get lost in it. There's no jumpscares or anything intense happening, but as a baby with horror this game was tense to go through for me. Honestly I appreciate it's not a more traditional horror game with a monster or something. Just dropped in a space that's inherently unsettling and leaving it up to you to explore.

If you have a free night and want to get lost exploring spaces only games could deliver then play it. It's literally free.

Games Where You Gotta Go Fast:

Distance

This game fucks. I actually remember when playing the first version of this game back when it was a student project. Students at DigiPen made a game called Nitronic Rush and it was (maybe still is?) available to download for free from the schools website. That game fucks and they announced a proper full game called Distance and it was one of the rare instances I actually bought a early access game.

Distance is a car game about going fast as fuck. The levels don't put you against anyone and instead just getting to the end is the challenge in itself. You have a boost that can overheat, a jump, and even wings when needed. The levels will require you to weave in and out of oncoming danger. They have jumps where you'll need to turn the car 90 or 180 degrees to land on a new track. All while giving you a wonderful sense of speed and accomplishment when you pull things off right.

It's not a easy game either and levels will get challenging. There's a ton of levels and challenges and if you get sucked into the gameplay then there's a lot to keep you there. This game seeks to deliver the thrill of going fast in a dangerous track where everything is out to kill you, and making it to the end. There's really not much more to say. It has a specific vision and fully realizes it.

Games Where You Trust the Heart of the Cards:

Foretales:

This game is very unique and nothing quite like what I've played before. The entire game is card based. Each of the characters have their own decks that are all mixed together in your hand. You have 4 resources you can collect, gold, food, fame, and infamy. You can get item cards as well. The board has various location cards you need to move through to move the story along. What's unique about this is the cards can be used in battle or on locations.

It's hard to really go into details how this all works, but you don't have a separate hand or anything for when combat begins.

Some cards have uses in locations and battles and others don't, but there all mixed together which adds to you planning ahead and making the best choice. You can use a eavesdrop card near a guard post to get a juicy secret which can be used for blackmail later. You can forage for food and obviously a forest will give you more then a mine shaft. There's a lot of really cool little interactions and creativity put into this systems that's just to complicated to type out and explain.

One thing I can get into is the best feature of combat. The fact that you can get through it without fighting or with less fighting then needed. Those 4 resources can be used in locations for story or optional reasons, but they can also be used in combat pacify enemies. Bandits can be bribed with gold or food for example. Fame and infamy can be used as well in certain circumstances. They are a constantly growing resource that always have uses. I'm sure it's possible to do a full pacifist run, though I imagine it would be difficult.

The game also has multiple paths for the story to go and lots of optional stuff. Multiple characters to use down the line but only 3 party members so there's more choice as well. Also everyone's an anthropomorphic animal because why not.

I just like how it's a card based game that's not just a battle between opponents or a roguelike or how cards are typically used in video games. If nothing else this game should be played for it's game design alone. If you want a really unique interactive story experience entirely dictated by cards then this is about the only game I know of like it.

One Step From Eden

I'm very bad at this game. So bad I still have never beaten it once. It's really fun all the same though.

It's a deckbuilding roguelike set on a grid. As the formula goes you fight your way through, choosing your path, collecting cards, and seeing if you can win. In my case that's a no.

The game is set on a grid where you have to manage what spells you currently have, dodging enemies, and somehow making sense of the chaos. You can unlock other characters that have their own unique mechanics to help freshen things up. Also the game just throws you in the deep end and lets you learn through playing. No tutorial or anything, just have at it.

If you're itching for a roguelike that's very fucking challenging then enjoy. 

Inscryption

This is another game I expect many others to know about, but if not then honestly just play it.

It's a rougelike card game set in a wonderfully crafted creepy setting. You're alone in some mysterious persons shack forced to play a really well designed card game. Of course if it was just that I'd not be recommending it.

The mechanics are well thought out and slowly learning the mechanics feels nice. You will fail, a lot, as is the case for roguelikes, but keep at it. The game is filled with secrets and puzzles and mysteries that you'll just have to figure out for yourself.

Much like with Outer Wilds way back at the top, I don't want to say much more. If you have somehow not played this or don't know anything about it then you should.

Tainted Grail: Conquest

This is still the only proper deck-building roguelike in the same vein as Slay the Spire. While I haven't played much of that and honestly couldn't get into it, this game I did.

It was described to me as Slay the Spire meets Dark Souls by some poor soul who's brain is forever lost in soulslike hell. In reality it's just a cool deck building game where you fight creepy monsters and slowly build up the village to make each run easier. There's characters to find and NPC quest you can make little progressions on each run. It's just enough story and context to give this game a sense or purpose and progression outside collecting cards.

What added more replayability to me beyond the quest was having 9 classes to work with. In truth it's really 3 broad classes with 3 variations on those broader class types. You have the fighter, archer, and summoner as the broad classes. They use similar cards, but their strategies vary with each subclass. A summoner is more about making their summons powerful, bloodmages use their own life to summon minions that get stronger and die on their own, and necromancers sacrifice their minions to turn into a Lich. The fighter and archer subclasses are as varied and it's a good way to use similar cards across different playstyles.

I had a lot of fun with this one. It's a fun deck building game. 

Thinking Games:

Manifold Garden:

I love the space this game takes place in. This is the shit only games can truly deliver on. The world is basically always looping. Each level repeats in all directions when your in open space. If you fall anywhere, you'll be ok. You can just fall endlessly even, it's very mesmerising and freeing once you get used to the fact that you can just jump off anywhere, and even needed to solve the level sometimes.

The other fun mechanic the puzzles primarily revolve around is the ability to walk on any surface and change gravity as you do it. Essentially you turn the wall into the new floor and is the main mechanic for puzzles in enclosed spaces. This game uses blocks of various colors and the simple task of putting them in the right slot is made complicated by having to altar gravity and matching them up. There's other mechanics introduced of course, but you'll need to discover those yourself.

The game can be beaten in a day give or take your skill at puzzles. I appreciate that it doesn't overstay it's welcome and uses it's mechanics in interesting ways. Also this reminds me I still need to play Antichamber someday.

If you like exploring spaces only games can deliver on or puzzles then this is the game for you.

FEZ

FEZ! This is such a fun interesting little game. It's probably well known given who the creator is, but if you haven't checked this out before, then you should.

The trailer makes it appear to be more a platformer then a puzzle game and that's half right. Similar to another game on this list, FEZ goes much deeper then a mere platformer. It has some esoteric puzzles. As I understand (could be wrong) one puzzle still hasn't been solved legitimately, but had to be brute forced and even now the community has no concrete answers on how you were supposed to get the solution.

The good news is the harder puzzles aren't technically required to just finish the game. You could still enjoy this as a fun platformer. The way the world works is you see the game world on a 2D plane. Like any other 2D platformer. However, the world itself is in 3D and you can switch the perspective to change where platforms and other things are. It's really fun moving about this world and in a sense each level is it's own puzzle to figure out how to get through it with these mechanics.

I highly recommend this game.

Thinking Games for DJ's

FRACT OSC

This is another game I would be shocked if anyone knew about. No one talks about this game ever and I don't even remember how I found out about it wayyyy back in college. This is also the oldest game on here I've played. I haven't touched this is years, but know I enjoyed it a lot.

What i remember is it's filled with music based puzzles. I also remember being very fucking confused and having to look shit up, but the real joy is just the vibe. Everything makes sound and the whole game revolves around music. I slowly explored as much as I could and just took it all in. It's a fun space to be in and I'm a sucker for being dropped in a unusual place only games can delivery on.

If you don't know shit about music production like me you might have a hard time or maybe I was just a fucking idiot and needed help. Either way I still recommend this to everyone.

Vibing with the Beat Games:

Sayonara Wild Hearts

This is basically a interactive album. It's a rhythm game that's not to difficult, which is good as this is more about the flow and vibe. There's not much more to say about it. It will take an hour and every bit is lovely. It's a visual and auditory feast that has some clever ideas packed in. I think everyone should experience it.

Soundodger+

This game won't be on the Steam store for much longer sadly. Warner Bros being shitty and taking cool shit down. I haven't played any other of the Adult Swim games that are being taken down, but I encourage you to find the list and get anything interesting while you still can.

The game itself is a fun little bullet hell rhythm game. The song plays and you are a circle in the middle of larger circle. Obstacles are thrown out into the middle timed to the music and you simply have to dodged them. I don't remember it being to hard, but I know there are community levels and I just have to assume those are going to be tough.

It's a cool game to vibe to and it's going to be gone soon. Don't miss your chance to get it.

Artsy Games That I Don't Know Where Else To Put Them:

The Beginner's Guide

This a narrative experience about the relationship between the narrator and the game dev who's games are being played. That may not sound like the most interesting premise, but trust me it's very engaging. This game has a unsettling feeling underneath it all and it's really hard to go into more without just spoiling things.

The actual game is you going through a series of small little games made by a Dev named Coda as the narrator Davey speaks to you about various things relating to the game and Coda himself. It's explores a character who's frankly caught up in a unhealthy obsession with someone else and quite the journey.

It will only take a hour and half to get through and I think it's worth a playthrough if you like narratives only video games can deliver on.

The Static Speaks My Name   

This is the shortest game on this list. It's also the most depressing. If you struggle with dark thoughts and depression and really need something happy to distract you, then do not play this little free game.

It's a sad and unsettling little experience that has a lot of room for interpretation. I'm a fan of little strange pieces of art like this and if this sounds interesting to you then it's free. Check it out.

Minimalist City Builder Games:

ISLANDERS

This such a cute game. It's a simple city builder where the goal is to keep building things correctly and move on to another island. You start on a randomly generated island and are given a set of buildings and a number to reach. Buildings will get bonuses based on whats near them and as you unlock more buildings the number to reach gets higher.

That's really it. It's easy to understand and a nice little relaxing game about building a cool island town. Pretty cheap and pretty fun.

Multi Genre:

The Hex

This is multi genre because it quite literally has many different gameplay modes packed in it. A bunch of old video game characters stay at a Tavern where a murder may take place. It's a murder mystery! Also so much more.

In truth it's a narrative video game about exploring these characters past lives and revealing a larger narrative underneath it all. This was made by Daniel Mullens who's latest game I recommended earlier. Much like Inscryption, this game slowly draws you into it's setting and drop feeds you it's secrets slowly.

The Hex was pleasantly surprising as I didn't really know what I was getting myself into. It's worth playing.

That's it. That's the list. Over 50 more games to add to your Steam library which means over 50 more games you'll get to, eventually.

[beacedocrime]

Art of the characters from @basilthesnakingthing 's Monstrous Children AU. Check it out!

Close ups and explanations of my thought process for some of my decisions under the cut

First of all, Victor Frankenstein. His physical descriptions are sparse, except for how ill he looks. I tried to give him a slightly sickly looking skin tone, but skin in general isn't my forte, so I'm not sure how much I succeeded. Other than that, I always imagined him with black hair and green eyes, and as having somewhat sharp features.

For the colours, idk, I just thought purple would look on him. I wanted the vest to have simple gold detailing on the lapels, but the watercolour wasn't really obvious, and I couldn't be bothered to search for my pencils. He's never described as wearing glasses as far as I'm aware, but I liked how he looked with them better.

After inking him, I could tell there was something I didn't like about his face, but I couldn't pinpoint why. Later, I realized his eyes weren't spaced correctly. I made a quick little sketch to correct this.

Basil said the gravedigger guy was gonna be inspired by some other classics character, but she hadn't given an example and I didn't have any ideas so I decided to make him as generic as possible. I thought he'd look funny among all these fancily dressed children.

When I drew these, I hadn't been told that in this au Jekyll and Hyde would be their first names, so I drew Victor calling out to 'Henry' with Jekyll in mind. However, since this isn't possible in this universe... thoughts on Henry Clerval 👀?

Jekyll! Drew him slightly sleep deprived and did not make good decisions about that vest. Fixed it later. Like Victor, not a lot of physical descriptions, so mostly going off of how I imagined him- brown hair and brown eyes, softer features.

Debated a bit on the colour scheme, before deciding mellow browns and yellows would be a good fit. Don't know why his sleeves are rolled up other than I thought it looked nice.

Not much else to say about his appearance, I was fairly satisfied with him (other than the vest). Though his jawline came out a bit uneven, and the shape of his pants look weird (I was not inking this on a table like a normal person and he slightly suffered for it)

Basil mentioned once that this version of him and Hyde also have the talking in the mirror thing, so I made a small doodle of that.

Hyde! With a quick bonus Dracula.

So, just to say this quickly, I did not think at all about Dracula's clothes, it was just a quick sketch cause I really wanted to draw this scene. Also his proportions are weird, and his skin not pale enough.

Hyde! Similarly to Victor, I did not like something about his face in the first inked version, so I fixed it in a quick sketch. This time it was his chin. His face felt too long, and I wanted it to be rounder.

Like the other two, Hyde doesn't have a confirmed hair and eye colour as far as I'm aware. His descriptions are along the lines of 'pale and short with bad vibes'. I imagined him with reddish brown hair, and the same colour for eyes.

I didn't mean his vest to be pretty much the same colour as his hair, but it happened, and I like it, so. I made his vest the same kind as Jekyll's, just on the other side. He doesn't have a necktie because things around my neck give me sensory issues, and I'm projecting. His button-up is pink because, like many other design choices, I thought it would look cool.

The sharp teeth were one design choice that the creator of the AU wanted him to have.

Other stuff- they all have coats/jackets (not sure which one is the correct term) that I haven't drawn here. I tried to give the colours a slightly washed-out look to fit in with how the creator described the setting to look, though I'm not sure how successful I was. I wanted Creature to be bigger, but by the time I'd realised that it was smaller than I wanted, I couldn't really go back.

[gorgonwrites]

bound to you (part 2)

diluc x fem!reader

wc: 2, 205

authors note: okay i know i said i like jumping into the thick of things but i am such a SLUT for characters slowly falling in love and the tension of dancing around one another before they get together UGH! here is a part 2 for my first fic. :) also! this is a side blog and i realized im not really able to interact much with other accounts here. i might eventually move things over to my main blog bc i dont do much over there anyways. dont be alarmed if "witchcraftandwhisky" replies or likes something lololol. thank you for the love <333

CW: 18+, fem! reader, reader is an artist! slight voyeurism, diluc accidentally catches reader masterbating, MDNI!!!, diluc AND reader are still dancing around each other rn ugh just fuck already damn

It���s been days since you briefly spoke with your husband, Diluc. He’s kept himself busy with the remainder of the harvest season, and you’ve felt uncharacteristically shy in his presence after his impromptu visit to your chambers. You have the perfect view of the vineyard from your window and you couldn’t help but greedily watch him, shirtless and hair tied up to stay off of his neck. He’s tanned quite a bit since he’s been home and you were pleasantly surprised to see the explosions of freckles that have erupted on his skin. Cute, you thought. There was some jealousy though, and you cursed the sun for being able to caress his skin so easily. You clapped your hands to either side of your face to rid yourself of the thought, and decided to be productive rather than wasting your afternoon in your window. 

Your eyes drifted to the corner of your room and after further inspection, you found your paints and canvases that had been long forgotten. I’ve hardly painted since I’ve been here… maybe some sketching will do my mind some good. You rummaged through the pile of art supplies to find an old sketchbook and some pencils and decided to find a shady tree outside. Adelinde greets you at the door of the manor, umbrella in hand to shield you from the hot summer sun. You both find a large tree with a lovely view of the vineyard and the manor, and you begin to sketch while chatting away with the head maid. 

After what felt like hours, a large shadow was cast over your sketch, and you were forced to look up and squint into the sun. Your husband loomed over you, glistening with sweat and looking curiously at your sketchbook. You quickly clutched it to your chest, startled by his sudden appearance. 

“Good afternoon, Master Diluc.” you couldn’t bring yourself to address him so casually yet, and his slight change in expression at your insisted formality was not lost on you. You began to fidget where you sat, and broke eye contact with Diluc to glance out at the vineyard where the rest of the men worked. 

“Oh, I think one of the boys needs me. Excuse me my Lady, Master Diluc.” Adelinde quickly said, winking at you before she gathered herself and quickly walked away. Up to no good. You tried to smile, but it came out looking like a grimace at your husband. 

“Y/n, good afternoon. I didn’t know you were an artist. May I see?” Diluc sounded as gentle as always, and you couldn’t help but hand your sketchbook over to him.

“I think saying I’m an artist is a stretch,” you sputtered, “it’s just something I do to pass the time. It calms my mind.” You didn’t know why him referring to you as an artist felt so embarrassing. You watched him closely while he flipped through the pages, noticing how his brows pinch together while he concentrates. He stopped suddenly, and chuckled. 

“Who, might I ask, is this?” He turned the sketchbook around only to show you a sketch you had done of his portrait that hung in the grand room of the manor. You gasped and snatched it from his hands instantly, curling in on yourself. You had drawn that not long after your arrival to the Dawn Winery, when you were still slightly optimistic about how your marriage to your husband would turn out. Diluc let out a roaring laugh, having to lean over you and brace himself on the tree so he didn’t fall over. You looked up at him and realized this was the closest you had ever been to him. You hadn't noticed just how many freckles had appeared on his skin. You noticed how his eyes crinkled when he smiled, and you saw fine red hair peppered across his chest. You also noticed faint scarring on his arms and stomach, and you mindlessly reached out to touch them. Diluc hissed at the sudden contact and quickly retreated out of reach, his own hands covering where your fingers had brushed. 

“I’m sorry!” you squeaked. You knew your husband couldn’t stand the cold, and you had been sparingly using your vision to keep yourself cool while you sketched. You knew your touch felt unpleasant. 

“I know you don’t like the cold, that was thoughtless of me.” you quickly apologized, feeling sorry and even more embarrassed than you already were. You made eye contact with him and Diluc held your gaze, looking confused. 

“How did you know that?” he tilted his head, letting go of his side and crossing his arms.

“Oh I, ah- you don’t like the cold so I’ve heard.” Adelinde had discussed Diluc’s aversion to the cold with you before, but you didn’t have many details as to why.

“I try not to use my vision while you’re home, but it’s exceedingly hot today.” you mumbled, bringing your sketchbook up to hide your face as you finally looked away from your husband. 

“I see. You,” he cleared his throat, “don’t have to do that you know.” You looked up at him again, noticing how red his face and ears were. Was it from the sun, or was he blushing? You couldn’t be sure. 

“That was actually why I came over in the first place- everyone wants more of the frozen drinks you made the other day. And I- I thought that may be something to keep you busy for the rest of the afternoon.” He was talking into his hand, still unable to look at you. Oh, how the tables have turned. You felt a wicked feeling bubble up in your chest, and you grinned ear to ear. 

“Oh, Master Diluc, you’d have your little wife work tirelessly to serve drinks to your employees? How indecent of you.” you smirked, resting your chin in the palm of your hand while you wait for his response. He gathered his composure quickly, and leaned over you to whisper in your ear.

“My little wife doesn’t know just how indecent her husband can be, hm?” his voice was low and felt hot in your ear, and he moved away from you all too quickly. You sat astounded, frozen in place. He’d never spoken to you in that tone before. He cleared his throat again, and his regular formal demeanor returned. 

“Besides, we don’t want you to die of boredom, do we?” he wasn’t smiling, but you heard a hint of playfulness in his voice. You shook your head in agreeance, still astounded by his sudden brazen comment. He nodded to you, and then quickly left to return to his work. You could feel the heat rising in your chest, heading straight for your core. You rubbed your thighs together in hopes of quelling your growing arousal, but it had no effect. You silently curse yourself, trying to regain your composure as Adelinde returns to your side, a smile on her face. 

“Shall we head to the kitchen?” she politely asked. You nodded again, not trusting your voice in the slightest. You gathered your things and stood up on wobbly knees to head back inside. You needed a reprieve from the sun, and you jumped at the chance to freely use your vision. Your mind wandered aimlessly as you worked, and you wondered if your husband would ever come to tolerate your touch. Why does he not like the cold? Is this the reason you rarely see him? What does he do when winter arrives? Your thoughts raced, one flowing right into the other. You realized you had long since been done with the frozen drinks, and Adelinde was calling your name frantically.

“Lady y/n! Are you alright?” you blinked in response, and realized it was snowing lightly in your kitchen. You tried to laugh it off, but Adelinde knew better.

“I’m okay, don’t worry. I was getting a bit excited while making everyone their drinks. I’m happy to have something to do!” you smiled, picking up the tray and turning to head back outside. You needed to get to your chambers as quickly as possible before the relentless heat between your thighs became unbearable. 

Diluc couldn’t get out of his head for the rest of the afternoon. His brief loss of control with you earlier was at the forefront of his mind, and he couldn’t stop thinking about how you looked at him afterwards. Your eyes turned hazy and a flush had quickly formed on your chest and neck. It was the heat, he told himself. He felt so bold in that moment, but now he wanted nothing more than to leave the manor and not return for a few weeks to let himself rebuild the wall that was quickly crumbling around him. With the final harvests coming to an end rapidly, he was going to be around Dawn Winery much more than usual. He usually welcomes this time of year, when he can spend a little more time to himself and rest. This year, he could feel dread slowly building inside of him. Maybe he couldn’t entertain you and keep himself as composed as he first thought. He greatly underestimated your ability to fluster him, and there was still a part of him that was reluctant to grow close to you. Growing close to someone means there's an opportunity to lose them. He quickly pushed the thought to the back of his mind, and decided he’d pay another visit to your chambers.

As he walked across the manor, he thought about if you needed more art supplies. You were quite talented, and he selfishly wondered if you had drawn him more than once. You had given him a happier expression than the one displayed in his portrait, and the thought brought a smile to his face. He decided to find the best supplies money could buy in all of Teyvat as a gift for you. He came to a halt, realizing he was at your room quicker than he expected. He raised his hand to knock softly, and froze in place when he heard your voice from the other side of the door. 

“Diluc, please-” you whined. He was hearing things, he was sure of it. The heat had finally gotten to him and he was becoming delusional. He had to confirm his suspicions, though, and nothing prepared him for the image he met after quietly opening your door. 

You were sprawled out on your bed with your nightdress hiked up to your hips, legs spread impossibly wide. One arm was thrown over your face and covered your eyes while you concentrated and your other hand was at your core, fingers plunging in and out of your pretty pussy. Your breathing was heavy, and Diluc could feel heat climbing up his chest. You were so close. You pulled your fingers out to focus on your puffy clit, wanting to let the feeling last a little longer. You suddenly changed your position, startling your husband. You were completely unaware of your audience as you got onto your knees and shoved your face into your pillows. You continued your ministrations, and your ass was on full display. Diluc’s cock was so hard it was beginning to hurt, and he could tell by your quickened breathing that you were close. With a quiet cry, you came on your fingers. Your juices ran down your hands and shaking thighs as you stilled and sighed. Diluc suddenly turned and quietly bolted out of your room, not bothering to shut your door for fear of the noise alerting you to his presence. He slammed his own door behind him, a thin sheen of sweat forming on his body. He was undeniably aroused, his cock straining against his trousers.

So much for controlling myself, he chided. He wanted to absolutely ravish you. He wanted to touch you, to taste you, and have you crying out his name over and over and over again. He slid down the door, resting his arms over his knees as he sat down. Dragging his palms down his face, he groaned. The image of you touching yourself to the thought of him was burned into his memory, and he wouldn’t forget it anytime soon.

[mrghostrat]

Hi, can I ask something?

I hope this makes any sense, but: Since you're exceptionally good at both writing and drawing, how do you see yourself? Do you see yourself as a writer or an artist or both?

Does this thinking in labels even make any sense?

Did you get into writing or into drawing first?

Sorry if this seems like pointless questions but I'm genuinely curious. I hope you have a great weekend!

oo this is interesting! but kinda hard. i think, for the most part, i think of myself as an artist who also writes.

my novels + fics have become so integral to me in recent years, but even though i've self published and long to be a financially stable full time author, it's just that i've been focused on art so much longer that it comes first in my head. from 2015-2021 did almost nothing but make comics, which is def a form of writing in itself, but i only seem to think of myself as a writer when i'm working on prose. i'm so so glad i finally got back into it in 2021!!! (and honestly i've felt so rusty at it that every single thing i made was 10x better than the last, and it's only since mon cheri that i finally feel like i've peaked to a steady level of quality. i'll probably change my mind about that in a year when i look back at my current fics lmao)

but fun fact! i've been writing and drawing just as long as each other. my dream job in kindergarten was to write novels and illustrate pictures for them. i've drawn since as long as i could hold a pen, but i also remember pencil writing a fan fic about my world of warcraft character when i was 9 or 10, sending in "how does this story end?" submissions to Goosebumps competitions, and prose roleplaying on my own proboards forums with primary school friends.

[thebirdarts]

My 2023 Year in Art

Because of my sporadic drawing, I just picked 12 pieces of mine, spread out across this year, that i felt had an impact or shows an one on my overall artistic style, from the first time I've experimented with something, and when i solidified it.

i nerd out over my own drawing under the cut!

In chronological order, starting with my portrait of my first WOTR commander, Alaun.

Original Post!

Not only is this is representation of me getting into WOTR, its one of the first times i did smoother and softer shading, something i haven't really done since. Additional, i can easily see the line between the metals i rendered here and Cecio & Celia's more stylized metallic elements. I miss Alaun, he was ahead of his time as a good kc of mine. its a fairly big full piece, and one I'm still proud and fond of today!

Original Post!

Estinian! god i miss ffxiv... Here is the root of my bright idea to use pencil brushes for colored shading, to get a textured gradient, and i used it in the metallic golds. its also my biggest art post on this blog! it is a big & detailed piece, and seemed daunting at the time, but i just put in the time, and was rewarded for trying to make sense of the armor [i used my own dragoon as a model for how thing actually interacted & what was what] Im still stupidly proud of it. it was my second piece of FFXIV fanart, and the beginning of many more!

MURA! original post

Given this is about drawings that have impacted me, i think this one is an easy contender for the one that's done so the most. Drawing Mura reminded me how much i loved fashion & clothing, and drawing it! I've always has a tremendous amount of fun with her drawings, and it all started here!! Mura also was the first time i repeatedly used a colour pallet for a character, with her pinks and purples now ingrained into my mind!

Original Post

Out of all my drawings, Estinian and Mura are tied for how much ive drawn them, which Estinian has an advantage due to my large bank of FFXIV screenshots & my redraws thereof. This was great fun, not only for understanding the armor better, but having fun experimenting in colour pallets! something i can see has carried on into my non-literaly coloured Celia & Cecio drawings!

Mura<33 original post [has link to its original art]

My first head only drawing in a long time, and somewhere where i experimented with coloring, as well as the introduction of Muras netted and braided hairstyle! in fact, you can see the visible brush strokes as what would eventually be the stylized shading used in my more recent portraits! The shattered stained glass. looks cool as hell. and was my first time majorly experimenting with layer options, something that would become very common for me.

Mura again<3 original post

Look narrowing it down to three was hard, i drew her so much, she really re-inspired me to draw. Lighting<33 you can really see here the style i would use on Cecio, just using a pencil brush rather than a roller one. its a piece Im very proud of, and one day i will light everything as consistently as this

Miss Star-Sailer<33 original

Expanding the working with a limited color pallet from Mura, and once again rendering metals, this piece of my wol has a special place in my heart. just... her<33 She<33 her muted and dark colour pallet, her expression... i love this one<33

GEORGIE!!! original

my baby boy<33 Im finally drawing curls... and the brightly coloured iris & tiny white pupil may have become a thing of mine.

Celia<33 original

the limited colour pallet, the non literal colours, the sketch peeking through, the shading on both clothing and skin, the hair? this is like the payoff to all theses previous drawings. i used a different pencil brush, and goodbye 6b and hellooo procto pencil!!!!

Cecio<3 original

If the previous drawing was the payoff, this is one of the stages of refinement, taking the new stylized skin shading and applying it to a portrait where the face is the focus, and damn!! Cecio<3

original

A compositional outlier, this piece earned its place for me revising what has to be one of the most drawn compositions of mine - the eye. In many ways its the closing loop of a full circle, the brushstrokes exactly how i would shade with my pencil on paper, the lines and movements coming naturally to me, in an entirely different medium. the main difference is colour, while my pencil drawings were firmly grayscale and i resisted all attempts to get me to use colour, this is practically a sunset, using my knowledge of not just colour but layer filters to create bright and overly saturated variations. full circle, just add colour.

Original

And the final piece! a portrait of Cecio, showing off all i have developed, from the metallics, to the stylized shading, colour pallets, the use of filters for alternate versions, the hair, the face, the new brush!!! its not my last drawing of 2023, but its a fitting end.

- end note.

if you will permit me to get sappy, 2023 has been hell of a year, but damn if it hasn't been pointing upwards. in 2023 i came to understand i was disabled, and my whole life changed course. My art became not just a hobby or skill of mine, but will be my main source of income once i graduate. my existing friendships have strengthened, and so have my online ones, ive met so many new and awesome people. seeing everyone's tags, comments and reactions to my art has been amazing, and thank you all for that. i have seen so many amazing artists and writers who inspired me to better myself, and also to focus on what makes me unique.

2023 has been a hell of a year, but thanks in no small part to some of the most amazing people i've had the privilege of knowing, it been a damn good one.

its been tough, coming to realize your physically disabled and having to rewrite your life plan was hard. its been overall up, but there have been some spikes down. im aware, that every year i say i cant get happier, and then i do, i break though another barrier, reach another high.

im not saying that this year, because i know next year will be better, and the year after that, as i have the opportunity to steer my own life, it will improve in ways i cant even think of now.

Thank you, all.

[not-poignant]

Hi Pia! 2, 6, 7 and 10 for the writing meme please

2. If you had to give up your keyboard and write your stories exclusively by hand, could you do it? If you already write everything by hand, a) are you a wizard and b) pen or pencil?

Hmmm.

Yes, but much much slower. And so also probably no, lol. At least not the way I'm currently doing it.

Look I type around 125-150 words per minute. Handwriting could never.

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

This one is tough. In a way, I've confronted some of my darkest fears about writing. I thought my writing was essentially terrible, and I realised that as long as it's mediocre, it's okay, and weirdly that nuked that fear outright. Realising many many writers are successful off pure mediocrity means I can be successful, I would prefer my writing be good, but it's no longer my darkest fear, that my writing is terrible.

And then I was afraid that people were just humouring me re: leaving comments and liking my story, and I was so fucking unhinged about this (hi I have multiple mental illnesses) I started a second secret account on AO3 and didn't tell anyone at my not_poignant account and I, um, wrote Stuck on the Puzzle and realised I was wrong.

And that's the story of how thespectaclesofthor came into existence. Part 'I need somewhere to write fanfic' and also part 'oh god what if no one likes my writing and I'm just

My real darkest fear these days is that I can never make a series as good as Fae Tales ever again. And that everyone knows this except me, and they're too kind to say so.

In good news, I'm generally absolutely wrong about my batshit darkest fears, so...

Like not everything I write will be a winner, but I think like - I still enjoy these stories, I still have something to say, I think it still has meaning, and I think it still has meaning to some people even if to some other people I will never write anything as good as Fae Tales ever again. I think that's why I struggle so much with the 'when will you write more Fae Tales' questions, because every single one feels like an axe to the chest, just repeated blow after blow of 'you'll never write anything as good as Fae Tales again, so just go back and keep writing that series and those characters.'

And that's why I tell people I need a long break from Fae Tales, because nothing helps you deal with a darkest fear than confronting it and seeing whether it's true or not by creating other series and seeing what happens.

I am scared though. Like, that's a very real fear.

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

There are two things, and they're equally side by side.

The first is the pure joy and satisfaction and catharsis in the process of writing. Sitting down to write these characters, even in their angstiest moments, feels like channeling pure Awen to me. It's hard to pin down, and the feeling of bringing a character through a challenge through to the other side is a strange, perfect feeling that I crave repeating over and over again.

The second is the pure joy and giddiness that comes from making connections with folks. Here or on AO3 or Discord or even in reading your public bookmark comments. When people say something about a story and it's like 'omg YES you PUT IT INTO WORDS' and they did it in two sentences and I needed like a whole novel, lol. (I am not succinct and won't pretend to be). When people used to say things to me like 'you're not alone in feeling this way' when it came to my own personal suffering, I kind of knew it was true in a distant way, but I didn't really know it. Writing aspects of that suffering dressed up in different characters let me know that I'm really not alone in feeling a bunch of ways, and even when I'm often writing things I haven't felt, the people who relate to those things are also not alone. Going into comments and seeing a bunch of people - many of whom are drawn to hurt/comfort for personal reasons - participate in something is a very anti-lonely experience for me.

And as a person who has been lonely all my life, there is joy in shining a light in the places where you previously thought you'd never talk to another person who 'gets it.' But now, thanks to these stories, I can experience that, I can watch some of you experience it.

Also like, an honourable third? Fanworks. Fanworks sdflkjfas that's why I have them on my wall and whiteboard and fridge and hanging in the lounge.

Was that too sentimental? Are you all rolling your eyes? I feel things pretty intensely lsdakjfsa

(I've answered 10 previously)

--

From the Weird Writing Asks meme!

[tryst-art-archive]

March 2012: Dead Ten Years (Draft 1)

This is both a nonfiction personal essay about me, my creative process, and my stepping away from art in 2009, and a Khra-nicles prequel/side story about Unge. It was done for a fiction class, but I'd already established a habit of telling true stories about me while pretending they were fiction.

I'll talk about this a little more in one of the upcoming posts, but in March 2012 I briefly returned to dA and tried to resume drawing and creating as I had done when I was a teen. It would not last.

------Text Follows------>

            I have always sat down for tea with my characters, sipping away in the café of my mind where we chat about their lives and their futures and their thoughts and their dreams. Before I decided I was too terrible an artist to wield a pencil, I entered these teatime meetings by drawing my characters endlessly: profile, three-quarters view, face-forward  stare, hands and arms and legs and feet and limbs, limbs, limbs, and a raging expression here or a joyous one there or an image of melancholy or remorse or fear or shock or thrill, and then the most important scenes from each of their lives until finally I went back and did the whole thing over again, pages of history notes sacrificed to the characters’ forms, their lines obfuscating the words.

            For a time, starting around 2009, I ceased drawing any of them at all, convinced that the only worthy endeavor was to create new characters, explore new realms, run away from the world I’d been building since 2005 and the pantheon of characters Mare and I had birthed in the primordial soup of our friendship, all to attain a kind of writing I didn’t particularly enjoy. Somehow, every character following that so thoroughly drawn tribe fell flat, pancakes on a cold griddle. Proportionally, my sense of frustration grew, and I slowly became convinced I wasn’t good for much but long strings of actions, play-by-plays of capture the flag, and roaming introspections that blended Eastern and Western in a way that my peers did not like.

            And then, in a fit of desperation, unable to conceive of a single new plot or personality, I wrote about Arren, andI felt reborn. It seemed to me then that my mistake all along had been to deny the characters I’d had tea with everyday of my life for four years. Quietly, I began to draw.

            Unge S. Chickt stood at her window overlooking the city of P’tak from its opulent heart. Xev had been dead for ten years.

            It was 0 A.K., the age-turning year following the death of the Demon Kifer, and Unge could hardly get used to the ideaJust the fact that the Demon was dead was nigh-impossible to adjust to after his reign of terror—thousands of years of civilization burning under his sanguine gaze ending all at once, demarcated by a change in calendar. Only the Elementals who were as old as Khra itself remembered a time before the Demon.

            It had also been a year since Unge had met the hero who had slain Kifer: Arren Minetelle, a petite Fox Raeth with ice blue eyes wrapped in the blood crimson of a Ranger’s cloak. At the time, the girl had pep, a raging fire in her spirit that did not compromise, and a conviction that hers was the right path, the just one. She appeared, determined to slay Kifer, armed with knowledge from Rhawen, and prepared to risk it all. Unge sent her to Nassab in search of an artifact the girl had called the Demon’s Eye and did not see her again until the Battle at the Elemental Fields. There, Unge had joined her forces—IMDP—with the Elementals’ and the Rangers’ in order to defeat Kifer and his army. Arren appeared amidst the fray, her left eye gone, replaced with a desiccated, angry orb. Unge had naught to do but watch as the girl grappled with Kifer, tearing out the massive, glowing red stone that occupied his left socket. The Demon had screamed, his voice reaching an unearthly pitch of terror, and from Arren’s eye the desiccated thing leapt out with an angry hiss, falling into Kifer’s now empty socket. All at once, the Demon exploded into dust.

            After the battle, Arren was nowhere to be found, and the Ranger’s Head was dead. Though Raeth celebrated Kifer’s death—such celebration Unge had never before seen—terror seized the Rangers’ ranks, chickens without heads. And then Arren returned, slogging out of the northern forests and stumbling westward to the Rangers’ Headquarters. The Rangers, the country’s populace, even the Elementals, demanded that she be the new Head, this woman who had killed the world’s great evil. Yet she stood before them, her left socket still a ragged hole, the edges of the bone cracked, the skin scarring, and she said no.

            Garron Baylinthe became the Head, and Unge should have been happy about that. The man was a native of P’tak, born and bred in the city’s love for technology, though woefully filled with its distrust of magic, too. Still, this should have been fortuitous for Unge, placing her and her city in a less precarious position with the rest of the nation. All the same, the moment filled her with an odd foreboding, and before long she found herself contacting Arren, asking one thing: Watch the Rangers. Become a double agent.

            Miraculously, the hero had agreed.

            In some sense, I suppose, you could almost frame my understanding of my characters as a psychosis. As I was, by and large, depressed and suicidal between the ages of ten and nineteen, I developed a habit of consulting my characters. I would sit in the shower—I would have been fourteen or fifteen at the time—and, feeling thoroughly sorry for myself for no good reason, I would conjure up an image of Kriamiss or Pain, and I would imagine them embracing me, lending me their strength through simple contact.

            This evolved, as such things do, such that, in the middle of high school, I would walk through the halls feeling them behind me—imaginary friends though it only occurs to me now to name it so—and it would be a simple matter to draw strength from them in that way. And, again, the whole affair evolved, as the fact of being single began to chafe, such that the characters became ideals, promising that, oh, if only they were real, they’d certainly love me because clearly no one else would.

            There’s something shameful in that memory, an embarrassment lurking around the roots of the heart, and yet when I think how, after I’d abandoned them all, I brushed closer to death than I ever had before, I can’t help but wonder if perhaps the trade-off was fair.

            Unge had never trusted the Rangers. They were, to her mind, a dangerous lot. Their Head was also Raeth’s Head, and while he was elected by the Raethian populace at large, Unge couldn’t help but wonder if the system could be rigged. Even when she was younger, breasts barely formed and yet already yearning for a greater purpose, the fact that the Rangers were Raeth’s only police force, its only military filled her with dread, fear, and something acid like bile. Where was the safety on that gun? Suppose, just suppose, that the Rangers ever went astray? Just suppose that they lost sight of their purpose, lost sight of their limits, lost sight of Raeth’s needs. What then? Who would be there to stop them? The Elementals didn’t bother themselves about Raethian business. The Mages were a scattered group of farmers’ helpers and wandering midwives. There was no one else.

            For a long time, Unge struggled with that thought. Even when she set out from Nitemaer, determined to see the country in full, that sense of Ranger Danger followed her, with no feasible solution in tow. None, until Xev.

            Twenty years ago, Xev said, “You’re right about this Ranger thing. We gotta do something ‘bout it.” Xev was from N’zik, a small city surrounded by desert to one side and jungle to the other, previously the capital of an ancient Dragonfolk civilization, and now just one of the four Raethian settlements that could be properly called cities, one for each point of the compass. Unge was not terribly impressed with the southern city, though the use of sandstone was lovely.

            “I know, but what’s there to do?” Unge was perhaps twenty at the time, a traveler for only two years who’d nonetheless done away with the decadent fabrics and elaborate constructions of Nitemaer’s garb in favor of the simple leather and cotton to be found in most Raethian villages. “I’ve been thinking about this for years, and still I don’t know.”

            “No ideas?” Xev, a Dog Raeth all of sleek Labrador blacks and dewy brown eyes, melted over the arm of his chair. He seemed impossibly long, arms trailing across the floor, toes delicately brushing the ground, and yet he was still, somehow, in proportion.

            “Well.” She paused, turning the thoughts over in her mind. “If you’ve got one organization in charge of everything, that’s a problem. But what if you had two?”

            He raised an eyebrow. “Two?”

            “Say you’ve got the Rangers, just as they are, but then you make, like, a second Rangers— ‘cept call them something else obviously—“

            “Obviously.”

            “—Well then you task the second group with not only defending the peace and all that stuff, but also with keeping an eye on the Rangers. Then you go to the Rangers and say, ‘Hey, keep an eye on the new guys.’ So now you’d have double the police force and both would be making sure the other one didn’t slip up and go evil on us all.”

            Xev smiled and reached out to touch Unge’s tawny hair. “Well why not do that then?”

            Unge blinked, and one of her canine ears twitched. “Well, I mean, that’s not something I can do.”

            Xev merely shook his head and offered her his hand.

            Within a year the foundations of IMDP had been laid, and the year after that, they began recruiting. Five years after that conversation, IMDP was complete with secret agents, a business front to hide behind, and the cooperation of P’tak’s local government. The time had not seemed prudent to reveal themselves to the Rangers—much more effective to merely spy on them for now, until IMDP was of equal strength at least—and so the organization remained in shadow, its business front slowly elevating it until its letters stood atop a skyscraper right at the heart of P’tak, among the richest of the rich.

            And then Xev died.

            Here is something else about the characters and me. Nearly all of them are some part of myself, magnified over and over until perhaps you couldn’t tell they were ever me at all. Yet the fact remains that they are magnifications, and if you really, truly wanted, you could trace back their lineage. Kriamiss was a wish fulfillment fantasy on steroids, and forever and again, in the present, it is always a struggle to determine how to reduce an angsty enchanter-healer-angel-thing back into a person without upsetting the tender chronology of his entire story arc, of which Unge S. Chickt is but a small part. And so you have to look again and see what else they stole from you. By which I mean, from me. For Kriamiss it is the angst. Specifically, the angst that flies in the face of all the talent, all the ability, all the good fortune, and all the love that has ever and will ever be showered upon his foolish, morose head. His is a suburban ennui in a place that has no suburbs—though obviously I have suburbs, roiling in my blood the way a tar pit might bubble. Arren Minetelle, great savior of not only Raeth but all of Khra—the world’s hero, defeating its personification of evil—has what in common with a girl from [town], Massachusetts who can barely handle a stubbed toe, never mind ripping her own eye out— twice? For that you should look to Arren’s motives. Here is a woman whose cause is so just and so righteous that surely she must be the hero, surely she has saved us all, and yet she hunts down Kifer not because it is the right thing to do—so many had tried and failed over the thousands of years of his life—but because he killed the man she loved, a Ranger called Rusek who believed in due process. Arren enters in on a quest for revenge first—an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind—and on a quest for justice second, and therefore Arren is a cross-section of should and is, and if I don’t have that in common with her, then I don’t know myself.

            But perhaps you don’t know these people, though now you must know Unge, and I’ve mentioned Xev, but as he is borne of M[...]’s consciousness, not my own, I cannot tell you about him. I can tell you about Unge, but I think you will find it anticlimactic.

            Unge is among the oldest of the bunch. I drew her before anime styling crept, poorly, into my artist’s hand. I drew her before there was a Khra or a Kriamiss or an Arren, at a time when M[...] and I were only just acquaintances who shared a school bus. Unge came out of Neopets.com, out of a time when anthropomorphic animals were new and exciting to me so that I took to drawing gelerts—strange, dog-like things—in skirts with big, lavender eyes—a terrible sight to behold. When I “adopted” a gelert someone had named Ungeschickt, the name disappointed me. I therefore had to make Ungeschickt – quickly shortened to Unge for all intents, dues, and purposes – into the most badass of motherfuckers. And so, the first picture of Unge, ever, presented her as a femme fatale in a pink miniskirt and pearls, thoughtfully gesturing with her bloodied dagger. In this way, Unge was born of my love of 007, only to transmogrify, upon her entry into Khra, into a desire for a better world.

            A knock, followed by Tarrin Carithelle, Rien Carithelle, and Arren Minetelle, all but Rien looking stoic. Unge turned, forty years of espionage squeezed into a business suit, forty years of aggressive gaiety etched into her face. “Hello, my darlings.”

            Tarrin and Arren sketched stiff salutes, each in their own style, and Tarrin pretended that she was not awed by Raeth’s Very Own Hero. Rien beamed, unfazed by the world’s goings ons, mind still tangling with gears and levers and electricity.

            “What did Rhawen say?” Unge asked, settling into the plush chair behind her desk and gesturing for the trio to settle themselves where they saw fit.

            Tarrin snorted, mouth opening to snarl about the peculiar woman, but Rien cut her off. “She doesn’t want to see anyone besides Arren right now.” The tiny girl adjusted her glasses. “Though she did like the things we brought her. Especially the mechanical pencils. Completely taken with them.”

            Unge rolled a pen on her desk. “But we don’t get to know where to find her?”

            “No,” Arren said, a stone slab dropping. Her youth frightened Unge, sometimes. The ghastly eye socket, the runs in her face, deep-set, that made her look like marble, the ice blue of her remaining eye—just ice now—her hand never straying far from her sword’s pommel (a sword only allowed by P’tak’s strict ban on selling guns outside the city and the centuries-long lack of trade between Raeth and Nassab, though that wouldn’t last much longer if Unge had anything to do with it).

            “No?” The pen rolled off of Unge’s desk.

            Tarrin grumbled but held her tongue.

            “Rhawen is not in a position to be as helpful as she’d like, and to that end it is better for her if as few people know her location as possible.” Arren allowed herself a sigh and continued, “I had thought that enabling you to go to her directly might not be asking too much, but Rhawen is adamant on this point. She is…”

            “Yes, what is she?” Unge snapped, frustration surprising both her and the three women before her.

            “Unge?” Rien squeaked. Unge shook her head.

            One of the lines in Arren’s brow softened. “Rhawen is something of the world. Old. She has her reasons.”

            “Well I’d feel a lot fuckin’ better about it if she’d just give us straight goddamn answers,” Tarrin growled.

            The brow line reasserted itself. “Perhaps you should just get better at riddles then,” Arren said.

            Unge pondered for a moment. She’d been working with Rhawen before Arren had killed Kifer, but the woman had never opened up to Unge the way she had to Arren, and even that was a chilly connection.

            A wave of fatigue washed over her, and she missed Xev.

            “Well thank you for trying, my lovelies,” Unge said, feeling herself sink onto her desk. “I suppose we’ll just do things the way we always have. We’ll wait.” Xev wouldn’t have tolerated this waiting. He’d have been tracking right up to Rhawen’s house and demanding answers, all with a pleasant smile.

            One of the oddities of the internet is that every individual’s idea of it is discrete, separate from every other individual’s idea of it. My internet is different from yours is different from Steve’s is different from your little cousin’s even though we all can and do talk about the internet as if it were one thing—one place—when, in fact, it is a thousand tiny microcosms. My internet was a place for outsiders to hide and feel less alone. I spent time on Neopets, constructing, building, proposing characters and web pages and drawings and later yammering on to deviantArt and then role playing with M[...] on AIM—all day, every day, talking around the character’s conversations as if we were at some sort of party—and on and on and on, until between M[...] and I, we had produced an entire world filled with faces I knew and loved in a way I could not know or love the people around me because reality would never be anything but disappointing. (And so there it is.)

            But what is odd is that when we left that world, all the other fictions out there were never enough for me either. So it was disappointing reality, disappointing fiction, and then before you know it, you’re what feels like a lifetime away from those socially reclusive days, and you find yourself starting to submerge yourself in all those old habits right back over again. And what’s more, M[...] is too, though the methods are slightly different. Why, after abandoning deviantArt four years ago, have we returned to it, just as she graduates from [college]? Why, four years after I set aside Khra, the KriamBook, the Pupcat Riley Story, the Asher Concept, and Arren’s Tale, have I found myself inexorably drawn towards them, fed up and disgusted with everything else that droops out of my pen, just when I’m meant to be serious about my work, my career, my life, and the future? What has caused us to come full circle, and why am I the only one of us twain questioning it?

            Xev died on a mission of first contact.

            Unge harbored two great dreams. The first: fix the Raethian judicial and political system to better prevent corruption. The second: re-establish diplomatic ties with Nassab and undo the political damage caused by the Great War, a thousand or so years ago. The trouble with this latter goal was, first and foremost, that a Human of Nassab would always kill and Raethian on sight, and most Raethians wouldn’t behave a whole lot more nobly. Oh, naturally, illegal trading had always occurred between the two continents—P’tak’s technological wealth was drawn directly from that fact—but Unge desired open trade. Raethian society was ruled by magic—the fact of the Elementals on the continent ensured that—and Nassab, left without easy access to magic, had turned to technology. And Unge wanted both. Nitemaer was one of the few places that mixed them, and that mentality ran deep in Unge.

            It was only natural that—observing the black market ships sailing between Bollen on Nassab and P’tak on Raeth—Unge determined that IMDP would certainly engage in some trading of its own and once begun, found their dealings with Bollen went well. Unge then thought to expand. To that end, she sent Xev to northern Nassab, and when he returned, he was merely a head in a box, a note pinned to the outside: “No Dogs.”

            Unge shook the cobwebs from her mind. Tarrin and Rien had left, returning to their respective departments. Arren remained, sipping water and looking over Unge’s view of P’tak. Unge, at her side, pointed out through the city’s haze to where the ocean was just barely visible. “One of these days, that’s gonna be all boats all the time.” She smirked. “You won’t be the only Raethian to scoot around Nassab.”

            Arren nodded, remaining eye closed. “Rhawen asked a favor of me.”

            “Oh?”

            From a pouch on her hip, Arren removed a small letter, some tiny object weighing down one of the envelope’s corners. It was sealed with orange wax—an odd choice—the imprint of what looked to be a dragon in flight squashed into the pumpkin color. An extinct animal for an ancient woman who didn’t look a day over twenty-five, apparently knew everything there was to know, and then refused to tell you. Why not dragons?

            Unge took it to the desk and broke the seal. Alongside the letter, Rhawen had inserted a pendant matching the seal impressed into the wax—one of those extinct dragons in flight. Unge ran her thumb over it, unsure of its connotation, though remembering that Rhawen wore one such pendant. She glanced at Arren, a question in her eyes, but Arren did not meet her gaze, sipping her glass of water instead.

            Unge settled into her chair and read the letter.

            Allow me just one more moment of your time, before you read Rhawen’s letter, before you decide if all this time spent poring over a day in Unge’s life and the musings of her author—her technical, real author, not Rhawen, the Narrator, who is the voice who tells these stories—was wasted.

            Purpose applies to all of these situations. I don’t know what your life was like in 2001 or 2002, but I know what mine was like, and for all the material fortune in the world, I was nonetheless struck with a deep-seated misery that I couldn’t explain, and really I still can’t, at least not in a way that feels authentic. I was filled with guilt over this feeling—“There are children starving in Africa!”—and  yet the feeling persisted until I became jealous of the starving children because at least they knew why they were miserable. It’s no surprise then that the characters I birthed were universally sad, universally restless, and universally struck with tepid misfortunes which, in theory, should be world-shattering, and yet in application remained ineffective. Kriamiss’s mother dies when he is fifteen, and he flees his home, finds the father that abandoned them and that man dies too, and then when he finds someone to love in the world, she kills him, and it isn’t until he’s been dead five hundred years that he has a second chance—to save the world, to become whole. My inability to feel anything at a degree less than acutely became his saga of misfortunes—too many to be useful, narrative-wise, but just enough to try to justify feeling the way I did.

            So why feel so acutely? It’s hard to say. Do you blame a chemical imbalance; do you blame a spoiled upbringing; do you blame an inherent, genetic sensitivity, or do you perhaps put it down to some sort of flaw, a lack of the “right stuff”? I’m not sure; it’s all too far away to say anything concrete about. The memory is unreliable, the heart is unreliable, the mind is unreliable, even the evidence of the eyes is unreliable, because all is perception. In the present time, however, let us put it all down to purpose. There was purpose when we created, there was a loss of purpose when we stopped, and now we seek out purpose again—and so the whole world, the whole array of characters, have returned, because they cannot exist without us.

            And how about Kriamiss or Unge? Why is it that every character I create is alone, at the end of the day, always by themselves, contained within the space of their own bodies, isolated? I am alone when I am with people; I am alone when I am not. Solitude, then purpose. We—the characters and me—travel alone and look for something to do. Something meaningful. Save the world, that’s always good, or maybe just improving it will do. Always with the epic narrative, always with the complete saga, and always with the search for purpose and the inescapable solitude.

            I reiterate: the characters are me.

Unge—

            Some twenty years ago, I sat on a café veranda in N’zik, and I watched a young Dog Raeth with tawny hair and a full bosom chitter and laugh with another young Dog Raeth, this one a sea of blacks and browns constructed into a long, lithe, lingering body. They laughed with one another, at one another, at themselves, caught in what I shall call puppy love. I saw, at that time, their histories and their present, and while I have never been known to predict the future, everything I could sense about them suggested that they were bound for greater things. When, ten years ago, one of the two passed from this world on to Ahrk, I knew of this too, and I thought for a long time about how to make things right.

            What answer can I give you? Arren sought out her own, and I supported her, and now, even with all the knowledge a mortal can be allowed, I find myself regretting. There lies Kifer, dead, and is not one girl’s youth worth the safety of thousands? But still the regret persists.

            I digress.

            You have a dream.

            The Dragonfolk are waning, but their presence is still felt and revered in the northern climes of Nassab. Southern Nassab is, generally, filled with hatred for their once-oppressors, but in the north the sentiment is less present, the sins more forgiven, and so a Dragonfolk token can go a long way. Therefore, please find enclosed the symbol of the Dragonfolk; may it earn you passage to those places closed off to all but the eldest. I will only ask that you do not use it to go to the Verde Isles.

            With these thoughts in mind, I wish you well and tell you now that Xev died wishing for you.

Rhawen E. Fox

            Unge choked and found, through her sobs, that Arren stood at her shoulder, merely holding it. The younger woman maintained that spot, one worn hand acknowledging Unge’s pain for the half hour it took the older woman to regain herself, her gaiety washed away by a ten-year-old memory of a dead man.

            When Unge had subsided, Arren took herself to the other side of the desk and sat down. She folded her arms on the black, sanitized wood, her posture suddenly more like the girl she should have been. Eyes hard on Unge, she said, “I’ve known tears like that.”

            Unge nodded. “Xev was—he made this. All of this. Just by saying it was possible. Just ‘You can do it, Unge.’ This can be done. And then it was. That was all it took. He said I could do it, so I did.” Her breath rattled. “How do you come back from that? How do you answer for that death?”

            Arren took her hand and gave it a squeeze. Unge could feel every crease, every callous in the hero’s hand. Here was where her sword had worn itself a home and here at the finger tips the place for her bow. These tiny cuts for every hour of traveling from one Raethian coast to the other and these weathered folds for every night spent alone beneath the stars forming a web to catch demons. Arren’s nails were dirty, but in spite of the usage written across her hands, Unge could see where once the delicate shape of a genteel woman’s glove may have fit, and Unge’s own palm felt suddenly fat and chubby in the grasp of one so conflictingly worked.

            Arren withdrew, her whole self drawn back up into the raw eye socket, sucked behind a glacial mask. She stood, saying, “The Rangers will miss me momentarily. Baylinthe’s put his son and Brue Nadir as his top officers. Most of the men are terrified of Brue, which leaves me and the boy to see that morale stays up.”

            Unge closed her eyes, nodding her understanding, but found Arren leaning in when she’d opened them again.

            “The boy. Maroc Baylinthe. He might be trouble.”

            There seemed something more she wanted to say, and Unge prompted her—“How so?”—but Arren shook her head and stepped away. “It may just be me. The men love him.” A tightness around her mouth suggested a deeper trouble, but Arren shook it off. “No, it is nothing. He is a Ranger, after all.” With that, Arren saluted, said her farewells, and whisked out of the room, just a red cloak disappearing behind metal doors.

            Unge considered the disappearing cloak and fingered the pendant. She laughed. “Dragonfolk symbols and the great hero feels compassion? Oh dear.” She’d have to have someone look deeper into these Baylinthes. Arren wasn’t the most intuitive of ladies, but Unge wasn’t about to dismiss her discomfit out of hand. The Rangers had completely failed to exhibit corruption, these past ten years. Perhaps now was the time?

            Unge left her chair, pendant still in hand, and returned to her favorite spot, staring out over the city—her city—where she contemplated reconciling the half-animal Raethians to their long-lost cousins, the Humans of Nassab.

[joshua-jorcoat]

Nothing to do with anything, but I have a pencilcase that I've had since farther back than my memories go. I called Him Flf Kerfuzckle (Now Kerfuzzle) when I found him in a box at Grandma's one day, and he helped me get through middle school with fewer mental breakdowns than I would've had otherwise. I still have him even as an adult, and had to patch him with some red felt, cause the pencils kept poking through his bum. (He has a silver lining inside the pocket that tore off on one side, so it stopped protecting the fabric on the outside quite a while ago) This is what he looks like.

Now, I've always wondered what he's meant to be. I thought he was a demon at first, but people have thought he's a dog, a cat, a gerbil, all sorts of things. So eventually I just said he was a dragon and called it good. I've researched the heck out him, having looked at his tag, and finding out that he's a DanDee Collector's Choice item. So when I was checking to see if DanDee had made devil/demon items before, I was surprised to find that they had. So it would make sense if Flf is a demon, considering he looks very similar to other demon characters DanDee has made before. But- the only thing on the internet I could find about him was an Ebay listing calling him...

A- ...caterpillar!? Like- I guess? I suppose I could see a caterpillar being red with black horns, and black and orange markings. Red caterpillars do exist after all. But it doesn't really compute in my brain that that plushie is a caterpillar. So I've just continued calling him a dragon. But now I kind of want to embrace the caterpillar aspect. I've drawn him a couple times before as a dragon, as well as many times as a demon, but now I've gotta make him a caterpillar-like dragon, with mandibles, and more limbs. So uh- surprise art attack! BLAH!

(Excuse the crappy all-pen coloring. It's how I used to color him in middle school, so I figured I'd color him the same way I always used to, and it may or may not have been a mistake- (And let's face it- DanDee did not pick good colors to begin with)

Anyways. Safe to say, I'll have this guy for a long time going forward!

[sunbeamstress]

i struggled for a very long time to understand why i didn't want to make art.

it was such a mystery! some blind spot in my psyche i couldn't get a fix on.

"why haven't i drawn in months?"

"why am i sitting here playing video games? i still can barely draw hands"

"why don't i post my work online?"

"why haven't i started a webcomic yet? i wanted to over a decade ago"

why? why? why?

why was i torturing myself? all i could see in the back of my mind was my mother, seated in her armchair, the dated old phone stretching across the living room with her at the center of its web. she would always couch the phone against her cheek and shoulder and lay her knuckles against it for stability; her left hand - the one i use, myself - would reach for a pen and fill page after page of doodles into a notepad.

i remember beautiful filigree designs and landscapes and pretty flowers and sometimes an instance of something lovely in the faces of her husband or her children, captured on paper without her even having to think about it. entire worlds spilling out of her fingertips while her mind was occupied with other things.

but she stopped.

she can't draw, now. she no longer has the talent. she used to beg me to sing because my voice was a gift to god, but she had a gift from god and she left it in a dumpster. these days i don't believe in god, and i don't believe in my mother, either.

in a circumspect way i'm grateful to her for this. i'd think about her every time i picked up a pencil. this unforgivable act of waste, in my eyes, was a fire under my ass that kept my hand moving. it gives me pleasure to admit, with honesty, that while i rarely sketch or paint, i only ever seem to get better at it. to this day, i'm not half bad. in my late thirties, i'm at a skill level that i was seeing out of the very most gifted artists in their mid-twenties.

but isn't that a silly way of looking at it? "i'm 37, and i draw at least as well as a really good 24 year old". what nonsense is this? this is the sort of invasive thing that likes to run amok in my head. what sense does it make to compare myself like we're talking shonen manga power levels? why am i racing other artists? why do i have to compete?

it took me a very long time to realize that Competition Itself had supplanted what i loved about art. it wasn't something i did consciously; it just sort of happened when i was in my late teens, my early adult years, and the internet's artistic community had exploded, a detailed landscape peppered with talented people, all with their own gifts from god, gleaming and gilded and razor-edged. they were doing things i'd never imagined. they were making comics and putting their work in indie video games. they were doing animations in flash. holy shit - they were making porn! this might sound quaint to you, O reader, but by internet standards i'm what you call an "old-ass bitch" and in those days, this was pretty novel.

god, i wanted what they had so bad. i wanted a webcomic. i was going to call it "Absolute Vertigo", whatever that meant, and it would have been garbage, but i didn't care. i wanted "Absolute Vertigo by <SCREEN NAME>" at the top of a kitschy website and i wanted people to gush about how cool it was and put it into their RSS feeds and--

this was the beginning of the end, in many ways. i really wasn't cut out for competition. it would take a really long time to figure this out. my peers were putting out improbably cool stuff and i felt like i was flagging. i didn't realize it yet, but the internal language i was using to talk to myself about art was changing. suddenly i was "worse" or "better" than other artists. suddenly they were "doing more" or being more "successful" than me.

art had become a commodity.

it's wild how this sort of mindset can take a mind of its own, can build its own character, can work its way deeper into your brain. at first art was discouraging - it was this thing my mother was good at but neglected. it was this thing i felt like i was worse at than everyone else. but then it became depressing. Art, this platonic ideal of it, this idea of it in the abstract, was turning into a weapon i was using to torture myself. reader, you have no idea how many nights i couldn't sleep. to merely ideate failure was to hurl myself back through time, back to the moment i realized my mother had given up.

"why haven't i drawn in months?"

"why am i sitting here playing video games? i still can barely draw hands"

"why don't i post my work online?"

"why haven't i started a webcomic yet? i wanted to over a decade ago"

i didn't have an answer for these questions, but still they were there. they weren't important or meaningful questions, they were tools i used to torture myself. i was supposed to improve for the sake of improvement, and to enjoy art as an act of pure creation, but instead it was a hammer i would hit myself over the head with because i wasn't doing it good enough. crazy how you can talk about your own talent the way you can talk about a dead-end job.

looking back now, it's astounding that i didn't understand all of this. it seems to make so much more sense. i've always had stories and characters floating around in my head - it's literally my favorite pastime - but it took me a very long, very painful time to realize that having stories and having characters doesn't mean you're a failure if you don't immediately march to the nearest sketchbook and jot them down.

the gift of art does not obligate you to produce it. if you cast it aside, the world isn't made better or worse.

your art exists for you. it should please you, should bring a smile to your face or evoke feelings you don't dare face on your own. art should help you work through trauma. it should express when you're happy. art is a frame for the picture of you.

it should even be okay to let it go.

it's going to take me a long time to forgive my mother. but i think i understand her a little better.

[obsob]

catgirl but she frequently commits arson 

[ikroah]

How many times have you heard someone say “if I had his money, I could do things my way?” But little they know that it's so hard to find one rich man in ten with a satisfied mind. —“A Satisfied Mind,” Porter Wagoner (1955)

It Keeps Right On a-Hurtin’ #21 - Freeside V

Collaborative Issue! Guest Artist: @tarberrymentats​

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Notes / Original Pencils / Transcript

Notes

Okay so here’s the thing. Yes, in-game there are sewers beneath Freeside that you can enter and explore. Yes, as far as dangers go, there are ghouls in parts of the sewer. No, none of these sewer tunnels actually allow you to subvert the Vegas gate via subterranean means, like I very confidently thought they did when I first outlined this volume of IKROAH and scripted this issue probably close to a year ago. Yes, it would have required rewriting the entire outline of Volume 2 to account for this because Agnes would have to get out of Freeside a different way. Yes, I care much more about telling a strong and coherent narrative than I do about what strictly happens in the video game Fallout: New Vegas. Yes, this is very sexy and cool of me.

Everybody give a big round of applause to @tarberrymentats​ for crushing the art again just like they did last December, they’ve been one of my favorite artists since I first ever became a part of this community and it’s been great to become such good friends outside of just the Fallout fandom. I love it so much when I get a guest ink-and-colorist because adhering so close to my pencils creates this really interesting hybrid of our styles that you just don’t get from any other kind of collaboration. It’s an especial honor to have had Halk work on this issue specifically, too; I couldn’t help but get the number one ghoul aficionado to assist with an appearance from of my favorite minor NPCs in the game: Rotface! He was fun to write, and fun to use as a way to show a little bit more of Agnes’ character and history. First that “maniac medic” thing Beth mentioned, now this? What the fuck is her deal? Maybe we’ll finally find out for sure in an issue or two. Maybe.

Also of note: IKROAH has a brand new font! Caveat Brush has been the font for all of the previous issues, but as my lettering has gotten much better and much more attentively professional over time, I started to disagree with it. The new font going forward is “Unmasked” from BlamBot, a possibly generic font that is nevertheless very suited for my purposes here.

Original Pencils (click for full size)

It felt really great to draw Agnes again after so long. With this issue primarily just being a conversation, I wanted to make sure the layout was interesting throughout, and conveyed the emotional beats and narrative focus very intentionally. I’ve included the original thumbnail sketches on the pencils for page 5, because that page had so much empty space anyway due to the way it looked in the final product. You can see a few alternate designs for the fifth page among them, such as a more typical-looking page, a dizzying overhead shot, and a close-up of the Lucky 38, but I went with the sort of “tunnel system” layout for Rotface’s dialogue rather than try to stack a bunch of balloons.

You can also see on the fourth page an original sketch for Agnes’ “flashback” panel (to the very first issue of IKROAH) that wound up getting replaced for old art. It just didn’t look good with the whole page around it, and using the old panel from Issue #1 carried a lot more weight. It was still a pretty cool design, though, so I’m glad you can all still see it in the pencils.

And lastly, there’s the final page, which was actually added after I had already scripted and drawn the entire issue. The issue originally ended just with Agnes walking away, but it felt like it was missing something, and this extra coda with Agnes and Cass entering the sewers was a much better final note. I just want to say, going into this issue, it was probably my least favorite that I had scripted just because it felt far too purely functional as a matter of getting Agnes from Point A to Point B. But it went through many dialogue revisions, especially during the process of lettering it after it was already drawn, that kept the same idea while adding much more emotional depth, and now I’m instead very fond of this issue and what it does for Agnes’ character.

Tumblr was being very difficult with letting these particular pencils be viewed at full size on desktop, so just click here (1), here (2), and here (3) for them instead.

Transcript

EXT. FREESIDE, a street corner. A ghoul known as ROTFACE sits on the sidewalk against the building of a pre-war water filter installation business.

Suddenly, over him, is:

AGNES: Is this seat taken?

ROTFACE: It is if you’re asking, ugly. Take a hike. Unless you maybe care to spare a cigarette.

AGNES SANDS sits down next to the ghoul.

AGNES (sitting down): Thanks, Zeke.

ROTFACE: Don’t mention it. How’re you doing, Agnes? S’been a while.

AGNES: Yeah, I was, uh…shot in the head.

ROTFACE: You’re fine other than that though, right?

AGNES (weakly smiling): Yeah. Yeah, just peachy.

ROTFACE: Y’know, I heard you were back in town—well, figured, because what I heard specifically was that you killed Dixon.

AGNES (removing two cigarettes from a box): Oh. Well…there was, uh, well, it was this whole thing with the Followers*—

CAP: *Last ish. -Lou

ROTFACE: Oh, I’m well aware, ha ha. Grecks said he could hear Dr. Farkas chewing you out from four blocks away.

AGNES (handing cigarette to Rotface): Zeke, I really don’t want to talk about it.

ROTFACE: Alright, sorry. Tough break, Ag. I mean it.

AGNES: Um…nice hat, by the way.

ROTFACE: Aw, thanks! You think so? Cost a lotta caps, but man, worth it. Really brings out my eyes.

AGNES: Wait—where’d you get the money?

ROTFACE: Just because I’m a beggar doesn’t mean I can’t save up for stuff. something nice every once in a while. And last time I really got anything nice for myself was that steak I had after top surgery. Besides, this is more of a long term investment. I spend my caps on food, that’s gone as soon as I eat it, right? But this hat? Bought it three weeks ago.

AGNES: I worry about you…please don’t buy hats instead of food.

ROTFACE: Bury me in it, then. If you worry so much, why don’t you buy me something to eat?

AGNES: I would, Zeke, but…I can’t. I literally can’t. I’m broke.

ROTFACE: Get your own corner to beg on, then.

AGNES: I’m serious, Zeke, come on. I’m only here at all because I need to get on the Strip.

ROTFACE: For business or pleasure?

AGNES: Uh…no, it’s…I…I…

A memory of blinding light from the barrel of a pistol, a gunshot, and then the silence and darkness of the grave.

AGNES: There’s someone I’ve been trying to find.

AGNES: But I blew the last caps I had here just trying to scrounge enough for the gate.

AGNES: ...I’m worried I’ve really fucked up.

ROTFACE frowns sympathetically.

ROTFACE: Y’knooow, I heard that security has been kind of lax at Mick and Ralph’s lately—

AGNES: No. I’m not going to steal it, Zeke. And not from them.

ROTFACE: Not gonna steal from Dixon either, or did you at least loot his corpse?

AGNES glares fiercely at ROTFACE.

ROTFACE: …eheh. Sorry.

ROTFACE: Well…alright, fair. I'd be a bad friend to make you go back to that shit, anyway. So let me be a good friend. Maybe I can get you onto the Strip.

AGNES is stunned. She leans toward ROTFACE urgently.

AGNES: You’ve got enough cash for the gate check!?

ROTFACE: Ha! Good one. If I did then I sure as hell still wouldn’t be in Freeside. No, what I do got for you is a damn good tip: you want to go in? Go under. But it’s dangerous.

ROTFACE: What you do is pry open the manhole on east Fremont and take the old sewer tunnels. It's gonna be miles of maze-like bullshit, sure, but all the pre-war stuff's still connected. The first ladder you're gonna want goes up behind the Ultra-Luxe, I think. Squatters used to sneak onto the Strip this way sometimes, but it's been a while, might be sealed off by now…might be. I'm not sure. That's not why they stopped.

ROTFACE: No…that'd be because of the ghouls. And not the kind capable of a pleasant conversation like moi.

AGNES: Huh. If it is sealed, would you know with what?

ROTFACE: Probably nothing that you couldn't pick apart in your sleep. Shit's gotta flow somewhere, and sewers need maintenance, so it shouldn't be all tombed up with concrete like what Mr. House did to that one vault hotel.

ROTFACE: But yeah, that's it. Fuck the gate check. Get a little messy, or just a whole lot lucky—and Agnes Sands is on the Vegas Strip for free.

ROTFACE: Really gotta watch those ghouls, though. Get caught, and you may not spend any money, but it still might cost an arm and a leg. Know what I mean?

AGNES: Thanks. It’s, uh…at least I know what to expect.*

CAP: Wouldn’t be the first time. See IKROAH #11. -Lou

ROTFACE: No problem, friend. And I’ll sell my hat for a nice grassy plot if you don’t come back.

AGNES (standing up): You really mean that?

ROTFACE: Hell no. You’ve told me before that you’d want to get cremated, anyway. Now scram, I don’t need deadbeat beggars like you hogging my corner.

AGNES (walking away): Thanks, Zeke. I’ll be seeing you.

ROTFACE (waving goodbye): Aw, don’t mention it, Agnes. And best of luck to you in Vegas!

EXT. ELSEWHERE IN FREESIDE.

AGNES walks a few blocks to reconvene with ROSE OF SHARON CASSIDY, and they share a few words before they continue walking together.

ROTFACE (cont.): I always wanted to go and try the machines. Y’know, slots…but if I was a good gambler then I probably wouldn't be a beggar, ha ha.

EXT. ELSEWHERE STILL, EAST FREMONT STREET.

AGNES and CASS approach a sewer lid over a manhole in the middle of the dilapidated street.

ROTFACE (cont): There's always some kind of system in place that just makes sure you lose anyway, right?

CASS casts a nervous glance toward AGNES.

ROTFACE (cont): So it’d probably be a bad idea no matter what.

AGNES returns the look impassively.

ROTFACE (cont.): There’s an old saying like that, I think, but...gun to my head, I can’t remember how the whole thing goes…

The manhole lid is off, and AGNES and CASS are gone.

[mythicandco]

It was not often that Emperor Belos visited Hunter’s room.

Usually he was working on the portal or in his throne room, or occasionally roaming the castle halls after dark. Hunter had once seen him without his mask, staring at a mural of the Savage Ages. He’d somehow looked equally disgusted and wistful. He was saying something under his breath that could’ve been a conversation, had there been anyone around to talk to.

Hunter had left his uncle alone that night.

But today Hunter was just sitting in his room doodling Red, waiting for new orders to come in. He’d grown weirdly attached to the palisman since they had flown in his window, and they were a wonderful model, sitting perfectly still while he tried to capture every detail and shadow. He wasn’t very good, but he was sure he was improving.

That was when a gentle, yet resounding knock sounded from the other side of his door, and a familiar voice asked, “Hunter, may I come in?”

Hunter’s eyes went wide and his palisman ducked under his pillow in a flash. He stashed his drawings under the bed and said, “Come in!”

Emperor Belos pushed open the door with the care of a potionist concocting a delicate brew. He was wearing his mask, but it looked like he’d thrown it on in a hurry and hadn’t tucked his hair out of the way, instead having it tied loosely up into a ponytail.

Hunter always got deja-vu when he saw his uncle with this hairstyle. The last time he’d had it up like this was when Hunter had accidentally damaged his staff and Belos had gladly agreed to help him fix it. He wasn’t sure why his uncle had been so eager to help him fix his mistake. It seemed like every passing day made Belos’ curse worsen, and his fuse shorten.

But even with his outbursts of violence (which were all perfectly reasonable considering the circumstances of each one), Belos still cared about Hunter. He trusted him with secrets he never told anyone else, and appreciated and cared about him as long as he stayed loyal and useful. Hunter remembered the stories his uncle would tell when he was little, tales of two brothers who went on adventures and quests and sometimes messed up, but ultimately cared about each other above all else.

Belos had never told the character’s names, but Hunter had always kind of imaged them in his head as himself and his uncle. He wasn’t sure why, but it was just what felt right.

Belos’ hand hovered in midair for a moment, before he reached up to take off his mask. The door shut behind him and he sat down next to Hunter, looking at the wall.

“Are you alright, Uncle?”

“Yes,” he smiled a little bit. “Thanks mainly to you. I’m proud of you for getting the Titan’s blood. You did well.”

“I almost didn’t,” Hunter replied, looking away. “I almost failed again.”

“We mustn’t dwell on would’ves and could’ves,” Belos waved a hand almost dismissively, as though he was clearing himself of those thoughts as well. “What matters is that the Day of Unity is closer than ever, and it’s because of your hard work.”

Hunter couldn’t help but smile. “Thank you, Emperor Belos.” He paused, recalling a question he’d never been able to ask. The last time he’d wondered about this aloud, Belos had turned him away and said, “Maybe at a later time.”

But now seemed like as good a time as any - he’d come into Hunter’s room, most likely just to talk to him. The Titan’s plans were going smoothly and everyone had a moment to stop and breathe. But on the other hand, if Hunter asked, his uncle might leave. He might never get a chance to sit side-by-side with him like they were brothers again. But on the other other hand, what use was sitting in silence?

“Uncle, I’ve been… meaning to ask you something,” Hunter admitted finally before he could chicken out. He bit his lip as Belos turned his full attention on him, already regretting his decision. Well, no turning back now. “With the Titan’s blood acquired and the portal almost ready and how everyone’s taking a little break before the Day of Unity arrives, I thought it would be a good time to ask.” He swallowed. Moment of truth. “…Who were my parents? A-and I know they were killed by wild magic,” he added, “but what were they like before?”

Belos’ expression turned from listening intently to horrified to very, very sad in less than a heartbeat.

Hunter’s back straightened. “I-I mean, y-you don’t have to-“

Belos held up a hand, silencing his nephew. “No, it’s alright. You have a right to ask. It’s only fair after the trouble I’ve put you through.” He chuckled, but it was dry in his throat. “I didn’t…” He hesitated.

“Your mother was a wonderful woman. She was always going off to slay beasts or tame small creatures. I know she loved animals and had a fiery spirit. And your father loved her very, very much.” He paused. “We didn’t part on the best of terms. I wish I could’ve told her that I was happy for her.”

“You said not to dwell on would’ves and could’ves,” Hunter pointed out. Belos smiled again.

“Yes, well, I suppose deep down we’re all sentimental old historians,” his uncle responded. “Now, I knew your father very well. He and I would always get into all kinds of trouble. It hardly mattered when one of us fell, because the other would help him back to his feet. We almost never saw eye-to-eye, always butting heads, but it was the kind of friendly rivalry good friends are supposed to have. He was like a brother to me.” His expression hardened.

“I’m sorry you don’t have a sibling, Hunter.”

“I-“ the witch paused. This thought had occurred to him only once, back when he was little. It was a silly thought - who needed a sibling when your uncle was the emperor of the Boiling Isles, and your family was his entire Coven? Hunter didn’t need friends to weigh him down, not when he had big things to accomplish. “What do you mean? I have you.”

Belos visibly winced, and Hunter flinched. He’d said something wrong, now he was going to be left alone again, or maybe worse, please don’t-

But the emperor didn’t move beyond that, and instead let out a long, drawn-out sigh. “You are the spitting image of him.”

Hunter took a moment to process this. “My father?” he finally asked. Instead of replying, Belos stood up. Hunter’s worry increased. He had said something wrong, he had upset his uncle! “I’m sorry,” he stood up as well. “Whatever I said wrong, I didn’t-“

“It’s not your fault, Hunter. I must get back to work.” Belos put his mask back on, and then he was gone. The door shut behind him with a click.

Hunter buried his head in his pillow with a muffled sob. An indignant chirp startled him from his wallowing in self-pity.

“Huh?” he sat up, ramrod straight. “Red?”

“Chirp, chirp chirp chirp tweet,” the little bird palisman replied, hopping from one foot to the other.

Hunter let out a yelp of surprise. “He is not!”

The little bird cocked their head at him. “Chirp chirp tweet, chirp.”

“Alright, maybe that,” he admitted. “Did you listen to that whole conversation?”

“Tweet tweet tweet,” Red swooped down and scooped up the drawings from under the bed. “Tweet chirp chirp chirp tweet.”

“Haha, fine,” Hunter picked up his pencil. “What was the pose you were doing earlier?”

“Tweet chirp tweet tweet tweet,” Red hopped up onto his shoulder and craned their neck towards an unknown source above and in front of Hunter. Somehow he was able to draw it, and it came much easier to him than the other poses Red had struck so far. He even added himself, with the bird on his shoulder. It looked pretty good. He held up the picture to show the little palisman. “What do you think?”

“Chirp,” the birdlike, wooden creature responded. Hunter laughed.

“Okay, but only a few more.”

[husbandohunter]

Moments of Despair #2 [Genshin Impact/Albedo x Reader]

Synopsis: "The alchemist who relished in his gifts only to fall from grace."

(A series of works where the boys deal with the passing of their beloved).

Diluc’s despair

Warnings: angst, tragedy, major character death and psychological horror (correct me if otherwise)

(A/n): I decided to take a slightly different approach this time. Regardless, it’s still killing my heart TwT.

---------------------------------------------------

Out of the many wonders of Teyvat, one thing Albedo loved most was how you were so different from him. 

Difference ties to the unknown, one that must be discovered. He was drawn to you the first time he had laid his eyes upon your form standing at the heights of Mondstadt's cathedral. The Sisters scolded you from below, but all you did was reply with a wink amidst their chaos before soaring into the skies and letting the wind carry your glider. Reckless they said. For him, your recklessness was intriguing. 

As the sun's light blinded his vision, everything he saw seemed like a glass barrier. For the ground was where he thrived and chalk was his core, it became the basis of Albedo's very existence. Even the geo Archon granted him a Vision of the same element to affirm his identity. The earth will forever be attached to his feet as he will keep on his stride until every last truth of Teyvat have all been realized. You, on the other hand, hailed from a place where he couldn't quite reach. What lies beyond this glass ceiling? Albedo found himself gradually holding onto a string of curiosities, a string he could touch but was not able to feel. 

'Interesting,' he thought quietly, while the breeze slip between the fingers of his outstretched hand. 

He was a character of logic, possessing sharp eyes that could pierce through the depths of the most complex formulas and a mind to predict their outcomes-  as long as alchemy was still related. All impossibilities thrown in his way only paved a path for him to become the well known genius he was now. Whether it was alchemy or  investigations with the Knights of Favonius, Albedo never failed to deliver the answers. But despite it all, he always found himself endlessly contemplating over things that were considered intangible. He wonders why you smile when there was nothing to laugh about. How could you tell between the complexities of the human heart? Albedo can't seem to put a finger on it. 

'Why? What drives you? What are you thinking?' 

The Chief Alchemist couldn't resist being fascinated by your unpredictability. It reels him in similar to a fish being baited out of the waters. However, unlike those creatures, Albedo only tightened his grip on the strings as if they were a lifeline, determined to find out what they truly felt like to the touch. 

"I can't really say it's much of an answer," you hummed, clasping both hands behind your back before declaring with a grin, "To put it simply, you just gotta follow your heart."

'Follow your heart...' What does it mean to follow your heart? 

"I'm afraid I still don't understand," he replied in a thoughtful manner. The statement never really resonated with him and it certainly weren't the words his Master taught when he was in the early stages of being created, "But it does suit you very much." 

"Really? But still bring your head with you," a playful laugh escapes and you add while pointing a finger, "At least, it's what everyone tells me these days." 

"Hm," Albedo then affirms with a nod, "I can definitely see why they would tell you that." 

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?" 

The days go by and his repetitious march towards the truth remains the same. However, there was never a dull moment when you were at his side. Perhaps that was the reason why Albedo became so attracted to your aura. The way you'd follow around his experiments, eyes so full of enthusiasm at every step of the activity. Sometimes the events can get a little too out of hand in which he needs to step in and save you from getting stuck in slime condensates...constantly. Albedo grew fond of your childlike excitement even when you weren't entirely sure what was going on. He normally distanced himself from socializing as it never sparked his interest. Frankly, he was too much of a genius for mundane conversations. Your presence was rather refreshing in this case. You were an oddball, just like him, and for once the alchemist felt like he didn't need to place that glass barrier between the two worlds. 

"You seem to be in a very good mood today Mister Albedo." 

He was a man of subtle expressions yet anyone could notice the small gleam in his eyes whenever he saw you walking in the hallway. Sucrose often remarked with a giggle after she noticed her teacher holding his documents upside down. But who could blame him? Joy, fun, laughter. He was able to experience those emotions all because of you; his beloved. You were the colour to his canvas and the meaning to his flower. You were a force of nature. Like a warm breeze gracing upon the terrestrial lands, you move him. 

Thump- thump- thump- 

Strings around his world began to weave one whole picture while they also tugged inside his chest. God had finally blown the breath of life into mankind's body, it was only a matter of time before Albedo came to follow his heart too. 

-------- 

"Alright, just one more detail aaaaand done!" 

You gave a small tap using the tip of your pencil and leaned back to examine your artwork. 

Masterpiece! 

On days when Katheryne had no commissions assigned to the guild, Albedo would accompany you to the Whispering Woods and conduct his sketches there instead. He was aware of the discomfort Dragonspine brought as the temperature wasn't ideal for anyone except for him. You eventually learned that your lover was not only intelligently different from the rest but physically too. Albedo, aside from the Cavalry Captain, was mysterious in his own way. He was hard to read yet never came off as intimidating, no one knew of his origins nor they knew how he came to Mondstadt. You wondered why someone like him would have wanted to get involved with your shenanigans. Rosaria often gave warnings regarding the alchemist's 'hidden intentions' in which you'd roll your eyes in response. The Albedo you knew was far from that. He was a big brother to Klee, a man passionate about his work, he was the one golden star among the many silvers in your sky. He was your lover. 

My Albedo. 

Brushing a hand upon the drawing you made of him, you glided down the lines of his cheek before resting your finger on the mark by his neck. You gazed at it with fondness. Truly a masterpiece indeed. 

"You do realize I'm still here?" 

The paper nearly flies out of your grasp and you snatched it back to your chest, "HUH A-ALBEDO, WHEN DID YOU APPEAR???" 

"I was with you the whole time," he states. The corner of his lip tug upward ever so slightly, "You said you wanted to sketch me." 

"A-Ahahaha, so I did," you reply while scratching your head bashfully. 'I thought I was looking at a sculpture!!'  You rushed to cover your face with the sheet. It wasn't that you forgot he was there, rather, you forgot he was still a living and breathing specimen who just witnessed your little serenade. As Lisa had once said, Albedo was easy on the eyes. His graceful features made him seem almost like an oil painting that could only be found in  halls of the most prestigious households. You made sure to capture everything, every detail, every curve just like he had done with your portraits. Only now you noticed the sun already began its descent below the lakeside, dusting the landscape with hints of bright orange as it marked the day's end. If only time could slow down. But duty calls upon your next journey and there was no telling when you'd return. At the very least, a simple portrait would suffice to fill in the temporary gap of his absence. 

"Can I see it?" 

You glanced his direction while keeping the drawing close to your nose, "Are you sure about that? It might not be up to your expectations." 

"I'm sure," Albedo affirms with a straight countenance, "I can already tell you've put a great amount of effort, otherwise you wouldn't have taken this long." 

"Yeeaahh I kinda lost track of time. I guess it's only fair that you get to see the finished product," you say and shoved the drawing in front of him, "Tada! I present to you, my masterpiece!" 

Albedo takes it out of your grasp and you watched the way his eyes expanded upon sight. 

"Well? Whaddya think?" 

Words could not describe the mixture of emotions that erupted within him. Was it distinguishable or abstract? Albedo spent his time pondering between the two answers as he examined the drawing closely. Despite the lines being slightly jagged and the unevenness in the placement of his eyes, he managed to make the shape of the entire image you were trying to convey. Perhaps it was all thanks to his well trained artistic vision which gave him the ability to do so. Or maybe he was simply biased. But there wasn't a shred of doubt that this was indeed your craftsmanship. 

"You even added flowers in the background," he pointed out with amusement. 

"It's the thing you make when using your elemental burst, I couldn't fit your hand in the picture so I decided to put it somewhere empty," you informed, "Out of everything, that one took me the longest." 

"And the rabbits?" 

"They resemble Klee's bombs!" 

He lets out a chuckle, "I see." 

Albedo kept his attention downward until he was mindlessly staring at the paper in hand. This was a memory made to be carried as you moved on to your next journey and it saddens him that he could not accompany you. If only time slowed down. Albedo wanted to hold onto the memory forever, because he knew once he gave it back, he wouldn't be able to see you for an uncertain amount of time. 

"Do you really have to go?" 

His voice was barely above a whisper. Guilt crept into your heart and you gingerly layed your fingers on his gloved ones, bringing down the paper that blocked his face. A pair of teal orbs held a reflection of your image as the sun's rays casted from the side. You returned it with a reassuring grin, hoping to soothe his worries somehow, "I just need to pay a visit to my father since he's been very sick lately. I'll be fine, so don't worry too much okay?" 

Albedo turns over his palm and gave your hand a squeeze, "How long will it take?" 

"I'm not sure but it will be a while. Snezhnaya is pretty far so..." you trailed off, "But my time in Mondstadt, with Klee and with you, I will never forget! I won't even if I tried." 

When you were met with no answer, a breeze came in to fill the melancholic silence. He too will not forget and he would ensure that it was the same for you. Slowly, Albedo brought your hand up, past the center of his heart all the way to cupping his cheek. He allowed himself to indulge in your warmth, tangling the strands of his hair with your fingers while closing his eyes. Sweet flowers. You always carried the smell of sweet flowers. 

"Albedo?" You gawked, "What's the matter?" 

"...There are certain aspects where drawings can't imitate,"  he says, grip tightening ever so slightly, "How I feel against your skin, the shape of my jaw, your warmth radiating with my own. These are the things I want you to remember." 

Breath leaves your slightly parted mouth. It was unfair how straightforward Albedo could be when showing his affection. Doing as he pleases without anyone's approval to the point it would even catch you off guard since he often absorbed himself in the arts of alchemy. But during times when Albedo did choose to express his feelings, you knew they came from a place of pure genuinity. The thought made it hard for you to tear away from him, "Did you ever find out what the strings felt like then?" 

Albedo returns his gaze, long golden lashes hovering them as he smiles softly, "...I have." 

As he began to reveal his stories, the dusk sky continued to flare across the landscape with colours of passion. Red, it was the thread that had led him to you, the same string that weaved him together as a whole. Albedo lays a kiss atop of your pinky, there was a reason why Mondstadtians called him the Chalk Prince. You didn't know the intention behind his sudden affection but he knew. It was a promise, one to ensure that the thread would also have you return safely back into his arms. 

Oh how he hated the colour red. 

"Al...bedo..." 

With speed he never knew he had, Albedo scoops you into his embrace and held you close. How did everything happen so fast? He curses his mind as it proceeds to scan your injuries, drawing a conclusion where he wished to be wrong for once: 

You were beyond help. 

"Ah..haha..." you managed to laugh through bitter tears, "You don't have to say it. I know." 

His breath hitches, trying to make sense of the feeling that was slowly tearing him apart from the inside. It's not real. Of course it wasn't, it couldn't be. What other possible answer was there to explain the numbness stinging his fingers? The reason for his shaking? Everything felt so cold. Your body hardly registered to his to touch, you were losing so much blood. You were losing. He was going to lose you. 

"No," Albedo shakes his head, "We still have time. I'll go find help." 

Please, hold on. 

He forced himself to think. The ruin hunter ran off shortly after it had ambushed you, by now the Knights would eventually noticed and apprehended it on sight. They couldn't be too far. All he needed was to carry you back to safety and everyone can go home. Albedo darted his eyes all over the place, breaths becoming shallower with each passing second. Where? Where to go? Which route was best to not overexert your wounds? Think. Think. Think. Why couldn't he think? 

"A..." You watched him in your helpless state. Every part of you throbbed with pain but it pains you even more to see the renowned genius who stood atop the pedestal of elegance and grace so utterly, undoubtedly lost. This was not the goodbye you wanted, though death already had you tight in their grasps. Not yet. Using the last particle of your strength, you tried to stay alive as long as possible. Just a little bit more time. 

Albedo freezes when a trembling hand extends itself to cup around his cheek. Every single thought he had in mind vanished and was replaced by a loud ring resonating in his ears. Dreadfully, mechanically, he turns his attention to where you lay. 

"Don't cry," you whisper, "I love you, don't cry- okay?" 

Albedo grimaces, shutting his eyes closed as he allows the pent up sadness to flow out of him completely, "I can't," he said in a shaky voice, "Please. Stay." 

"I'm sorry," Your vision blurs and he hugs you even more. Drawing your final breath, you relay your most cherished words through a broken smile, "But no matter w-where I go...I won't for..ge.." 

The moment your hand fell, Albedo finally understood the difference between death and loss. 

It was...suffocating. Having the air trapped in his throat, begging to release yet it hurts to speak. The never ending stabs that pulsed within his veins rushed forth like the scraping  blizzard of Dragonspine until his whole body lost all its senses. The world was shattering. He could no longer feel your weight. He could no longer feel. 

(Y/n). 

Albedo glances at his blood stained fingers where the thread had been severed, wide eyes drowning in sorrow. What a horrible feeling. Was this a warning sent by the gods? For stepping into the boundaries of knowing too much? Ah the curse of knowledge man must bear when eating the temptatious fruit. It was the result of choosing to love you. With life, death is inevitable and with love, it will eventually bring pain. Everything had a price to pay and as an alchemist, Albedo knew that better than anyone. 

"...Meaningless..." 

But he refused to accept it. 

Cradling your corpse, he leans in and places a kiss on your forehead, lips quivering as they lingered for a second too long before gathering the strength to stand back on his feet. Nothing will stop the alchemist from reuniting with you. If the laws wished to take you away from him then he will use everything in his power to fight against those laws. 

"This is not goodbye..." Albedo said to the sleeping girl, "And it will never be." 

When the sun sinks below the plains and the stars lose their light, the sky had been replaced with a palette of darkness. It was time to go home. 

------ 

"Have you all heard about the rumours?" 

A group of knights gather in the corner as they whisper about. Sucrose stops on her tracks and hides behind a wall, clutching the book close to her chest in an attempt to stay hidden. 

"Another criminal disappeared from the dungeons? Crazy..." 

"More like creepy. I was told that place might be haunted by some dead prisoner's ghost. Even the Church is hopping onto this case." 

"Well I hope it doesn't get any worse. So many of us started going on night patrols..." 

Their voices faded out of range as the anemo user backtracks her steps carefully. Several months passed since the news of mysterious kidnappings have been announced to the public. Rumours of their whereabouts swirled around the city and much to her discomfort, Sucrose happened to catch every single one of them. There couldn't possibly be evil spirits lurking in the Favonious Headquarters right? She silently shrieks at the thought, shaking her head furiously to stop her mind from going too deep. No, I have to find him. Without wasting another minute, the anemo user sprinted towards the stairs all the way up to the second floor before stopping directly in front of her teacher's office. Despite the adrenaline that occured at the same time, she made sure to knock. 

No answer. 

"Strange, he told me he would be here today..." Sucrose muttered to herself. But suddenly she heard the sound of objects shifting from the otherside, signaling that there was indeed someone occupying the room. Without realizing, she held her breath out of anticipation. 

"Come in." 

The door creaks as she opens them, giving her enough space to slip between the gap, "Mister Albedo?" 

"You're early today," The Chief Alchemist noted from his desk, "Is there something the matter?" 

"Y-You mean you don't know? There was just another case about a person disappearing from the dungeons," Her tone became more frantic as she rambled to herself, "The kidnapper never leaves a trace and no one knows how they were able to get out. Even when we ask the guards what happened, they can't seem to remember as if...as if someone casted a spell on them!" 

"A spell?" He inquires, "I suppose that could be a possibility." 

"I think so too. I-It's the only explanation that makes sense! I mean...ghosts don't exist after all," Sucrose nervously looks down at her shoes while giving her book a squeeze, "But why? Who could be capable of such advanced techniques? No matter how hard I try, I can't seem to understand their intentions." 

"...Yes. It is a very strange occurrence indeed." 

Noticing her teacher's withdrawn attitude, Sucrose couldn't help but feel flustered at her own behaviour, "Ah my apologies Mister Albedo, I didn't mean to go off track. Have there been any progress on the investigations so far?" 

Albedo briefly glanced at the various documents splayed across his table. His reputation as an incredibly intelligent individual had reached far and wide through Mondstadt. This led to the authorities requesting his assistance regarding the recent matters, despite him specializing in the alchemical field, he was also the Captain of their Investigation Team. Although, Albedo detested partaking in things he deemed irrelevant to his research; 

"I'm afraid I would need more evidence to draw a conclusion." 

"Eh? You still need more?" 

He could not deny that the given authoritative position had provided much benefits to his own accord. 

"My expertise lies in the subject of alchemy," Albedo reasoned and proceeds to intertwine his fingers in front of his mouth, "Humans on the other hand, are very unpredictable in nature. Even the essence of their existence is hard to obtain." 

"Essence of their existence?" Sucrose repeated softly. She wanted to ask what he meant but the blank expression was evident  enough to signal his impatience. At least, that was what she thought, "Nevermind! I have something that might help," taking out a slip from her textbook, she handed it to him, "It's the report Captain Kaeya gave me. He said that the culprit might be a traitor coming from the Knights of Favonius." 

He narrows his eyes. 

"I-I think he might be right! Just think about it, we haven't found anything at all for the past few months but when we do, I sometimes feel like we're just running in circles...oh what if it's becau-" 

"Sucrose." 

"Y-Yes?!" 

Albedo calmly looks at the flustered girl, not realizing how sharp his tone was, "You're overthinking again. Perhaps it's best that you take this day off." 

"But I came here to help," she insisted, "I know it hurts to lose someone you love! Don't you understand that we're all worried about you? And Klee, she..." 

"..." 

"Please Mister Albedo, if there's anything I could do-" 

"No need," he cuts her off once again, "Your stress levels are too high. We can't go any further if you continue to act like this." 

"Oh," her ruby eyes casted to the side, "I understand..." 

"Good. Now, if you would excuse me," Albedo bid her farewell and watched as the door clicked behind her, observing every detail until he was sure that the absolute silence had returned. He picks up Kaeya's document. Such remarkable handwriting. But of course, appearances are only meant to be displayed on the surface for the Captain was a sly man, wearing a mask to shield what lies underneath. Just like his letter, they were full of innuendos and condensed meanings, orchestrated together until the truth spoke loudly to Albedo himself. 

"So, that's what he thinks." 

Perhaps the alchemist should have been a little more discreet. 

-------- 

There was a certain place in Dragonspine that no one dared to enter. But those who have, they never return. 

"Hm, no response. Now as for the next step..." 

And he was the reason why. 

Taking the sword out of the transmutation circle, Albedo turned to the snowy hill nearby and activated his alchemy. A small portion of it dissipates, revealing a trench that went so deep underground that even warmth couldn't outplay the sheer cold. It was the perfect hiding place for the evidence to lay out of sight and an environment where only he could handle. The alchemist tossed the leftover along with the others before exiting quietly, summoning back the ice to bury his victims once again. Another day, another experiment, another stain goes to his title. The path he walked upon was one littered with corpses and the sins he committed. But despite the bones crunching beneath his feet and the weight of the dead hanging on his shoulders, the alchemist was numb to it all. Like an entity floating in space with nothing to hold, he became unable to feel. 

"I'm back," When reaching the center of Starglow Cavern, Albedo puts his hand on the icicle and caressed it's hard cold surface, "Did you sleep well?" 

The girl did not respond. Her eyes were closed and her skin was as young as ever. She was frozen in time. 

"You must have." 

Albedo felt the sword beginning to shake in his grasp as it resonated with his energy. Dust particles emitted from the hilt and slowly made their climb to the side of his arm. Still, Albedo's attention did not waver, "To this day, I've been thinking about what you told me the first time we met." 

"..." 

"Follow your heart. I couldn't understand it at first but after being around your presence, I believe I can finally recognize what that term means." 

He closes his eyes as he envisioned your lively form running across the landscape. Albedo, Albedo! The sound of his name was mixed with your laughter while Klee came into the scene and caught the dandelions with you. A content smile formed on his countenance as he watched from afar, even if it was just a memory, "It's everything. The breakfast we ate together, to the nights spent camping outside, and the silly moments we shared, they bring all these colours that I never knew existed." 

"..." 

Albedo curls his fingers against the ice as he continues to lament, "Perhaps that's why I began noticing the strings around me. The closer I was to answer, the more I felt it was necessary to discover what they are. All this time, you were the answer I was searching for," Moist begins to build up in his eyes but they freeze up once reaching the corners. How cruel. Despite what he went through, he wasn't even granted the liberty to cry, "Because with you, I'm able to feel them." 

He wonders what you would think if you saw him right now. Albedo peers at his reflection casted on the crystalline surface, the frame of his face had been decorated with streaks of purple and red, spreading out like tree branches as they both fought for dominance. The teal coloured orbs you once adored were beginning to transform to a colour that reminded him of his darkest days. This was Albedo's true nature- a monster, a being that wasn't human, the essence in which you never had the chance to see. 

"I know I may not be the same as I was before," he added, "But if that is what it takes to follow your heart, will you let me feel the strings again?" 

Would you still love me the same? 

"..." 

"If so, then please understand my actions," Albedo takes a step back as he held out the sword in front of him. At last, the preparations have finally been completed. He plunges the blade to the ground with full force and the surrounding area begins to shake under the power accumulated through many, intentional sacrifices. To revive the dead was a forbidden art as it came with heavy consequences. If it weren't for Albedo's talent and quick wit, the process would have consumed him long before executing the last stage. He winces, the pain was excruciating. It was hard for him to ignore the sound of his skin cracking below his ears and all the way to his nose as they fall off in the shape of small rock-like chunks. Everything hurt so much that even death sounded like a sweet dream but Albedo couldn't afford to give up. He had already come this far, his hands completely washed with sin and his reputation already broken beyond repair, Albedo had nowhere else to go. This was his last destination. 

"Soon-" he pants between choked breaths. Soon your eyes will open. He could drown in your embrace, one that was warm and not cold. Soon he will be able revive those cherished memories from a frozen past. It was all he could think of right now. Your existence was the reason why a part of him felt whole and your death made him realize how painful it was to tear away those pieces. Albedo refused to let go of those pieces, they had already become a part of him. And if this path ended up tearing him even more, then so be it. 

"I should have stopped you the moment you were born." 

The intruder snapped him awake and he swung around to where they stood. But before Albedo could make out who it was, they lunged past him with incredible speed, kicking the sword off the ground while severing his two arms once and for all. They flew to the side, blood dyed purple trickling from the edges of his joint as he struggled to stay upright. 

"Dains...leif..." 

Dainsleif watched the alchemist fall onto his back as the light around him slowly faded away. He turned his gaze to where the objective was and noticed a girl encased within the ice. The man sighs out of relief when she shows no signs of life, he came just in time, "So this is how it ends." 

Albedo weakly stared at the blonde man. He attempted to say something but the blood caught in his mouth prevented him from that. 

"Save your breath, you won't be having any," Dainsleif remarks in a cold manner and glared at his bloodied form, "The renowned Chief Alchemist of Mondstadt and an important member of Ordo Favonious. Hmph, what an interesting turn of events. Out of everyone, I never thought you were the type to act so foolish." 

Foolish...what a foreign name to be called as. He never heard anyone tell him he was foolish. 

"Truly a pity," With a flick of a wrist, Dainsleif brought his sword to Albedo's neck. It was unbelievable how he had the endurance to go through all that pain while still breathing at this point but what is there to be expected from a monster? "Remember that all actions have consequences." 

The alchemist watched as his life flashed before him, the weight of his sins had finally caught up. He had always seen the world as a platform for his objectives and results were merely a natural cause after attempting many experiments. But death as a consequences was an unbearble realization upon his final moments. He abandoned his title, his pupil and his dearest sister. In the end, he was still unable to fulfill his duty. 

"I just..." Albedo mumbled, his words slurring together, "wanted..." 

As the ashes turn to ashes and dust becomes dust, chalk returns to the earth, forever yearning a place that can never be reached.

[thesmokingguns]

Picnic in the Park

Pairing: Axl Rose x Reader

Word Count: 2128

Fluff

Request Summary: “Axl rose meets a girl threw slash who is his childhood friend whos also an amazing painter and just is infatuated with how pretty she is and he just follows her around like a puppy.Tan skin brown hair that goes to lower back brown eyes, wears alot of cute sun dresses and is very kind”

A/N: I am catching up on requests. So if you have requested anything in the past week or so thag oiece should be coming out soon. Thanks everyone for reading

Tag list: @ayablackwood @agroupiewhore @thenobodies-inc @littlemisscare-all

Your mind was a mixture of light and dark, complimentary colors, and images burned into your mind that you wanted to paint later. If there wasn’t a brush in your hand you were taking notes with a pencil, sketching the world around it through eyes that only you saw it from. You captured everyday life like the older woman with the mesh bag she had filled with fruit or the man with his red beard, a few weeks unkept, napping in the alley to get a break from the heat. You took these people, characters of the world and had them live forever on the canvas you painted on.

Art was your passion. You loved walking around Hollywood with a set of watercolors or a notebook to sketch in and take in the lives of others. There was some sort of poetic feeling of taking a stranger from the street and importilizing them as a character in your art. You created a narrative for them that they may not be living. It was cathartic and you’d spend hours of your day people watching until you finally found the right subject.

Sketching out a bump on someone's nose that might have come from a childhood accident or from their Freshman year of college when they drunkenly fell down the front steps of the dorm, you created their unknown life story as you placed each line of their face into place. If you didn’t infuse their story into the piece it was just some colorful person without any meaning. But you wanted to give the viewer of your art a full piece. They should be able to look at your picture and understand the life that the subject lived; your art created that life.

It was crazy to think that a few years before you were in school thinking about becoming an English teacher.It was a chance meeting at a grocery store when you ran into your old friend Saul’s mother. When you had been kids the pair of you had been so close and secretly your mothers had both had fingers crossed for a wedding that never happened. The pair of you split apart the summer after senior year to set out of a life you each wanted. His mother had invited you over for dinner, which she also invited her son to, thrusting the pair of you back into each other's lives.

Oddly enough, it was like time hadn’t passed between you. The easiness of your friendship coming back without even trying and soon the pair of you were hanging out on almost a daily basis. With your schedule up helped manage his house, buying groceries, doing some cleaning, and running a few errands he never remembered. In return you had a few rooms to yourself. Slash had wanted to make sure you had time for your art as well as a space for it.

Dressing in a white floral pattern sundress you grabbed your bag that contained your art supplies. You wanted to get to the park early and set up a blanket you could spend the day sketching and painting on. You planned to soak up the sun in your skin and use the good lighting to get some new work to sell for the craft fair this weekend. As you turned to grab the picnic foods you had made the night before you saw Axl sitting at the counter. His green eyes looked up, smiling when he saw you.

“Hey, Y/N. Slash just left. I’m going to leave in a minute. I was just finishing up some lyrics.” he was always over and you thought that he was lonely in his role as lead singer. Even though Axl put on this tough guy imagine and had a reputation it was like he needed to work for that because he thought that was what rock stars were supposed to do. Whenever he was around you he seemed lost, always making extra conversation or taking the time to go walk to the coffee cafe with you and wait in line, even if he didn't want anything.

“I’m heading out for a day in the park.” you told him, moving the wax paper covered sandwiches into a small wicker basket, along with some fruit and cheese, some water, and a bottle of wine. You could feel his eyes on you, “I’m over packing and have more than enough if you want to come with me?” you let your eyes flutter up from packing the basket to look at him. “I’ll leave you alone to write because I’m just going to spend the time working on some new portraits.” It was important to you that you set up expectations. There was no need for him to feel like he was going there to entertain you or vice versa.

“I’d love to go. You don’t mind?” he asked as you finished packing up the wicker basket. You shook your head no, letting him pick up the food you had just packaged and leading you outside, “What park did you want to go to? I can drive us there.” you told him what you were thinking, getting comfortable in the convertible.

When you had moved in with Slash you had forged fast friendships with his bandmates. Even though you weren’t at every show and didn't always go backstage you had gotten close to them in different ways. On Wednesday nights you hosted a dinner party where you made them all come by so you had an excuse to cook for them. When someone had a ripped piece of clothing at a show you’d quietly take out your sewing kit, stitching patches in jeans and repairing favorite band shirts. You liked being around them all because of how animated everyone was; they were so easy to draw. You had a whole sketchbook of black and white images from the band. Your favorite subjects were Slash and Axl, mainly because they were the two you were around the most and had the most flexibility when it came to moods.

Axl had grown close to you, drawn into the caring nature you had. It was hard for him to understand that someone would do things for him without expecting anything in return. The first time that you had been out drinking with them and insisted Axl came home with you so you knew he was safe he had thought was a come on. When you helped him drink water and gave him aspirin before tucking him into bed he was shocked. Even more shocking was waking up to find his clothes washed and folded on the guest room chair and you carrying in a breakfast tray of freshly made foods. That’s just how you showed you cared about your friends. Being the mother of the group and taking care of them helped you feel like you were contributing as a friend.

Spreading out the blanket under the Weeping Willow tree. You motioned for Axl to sit as you toed off your sandals and moved to sit down. Digging through your bag you set out your sketch pad and pencils. You could see Axl out of the corner of your eye. He didn’t seem to know what to do. You pulled him down to the blanket, settling him so he could rest his back against the tree. You pulled off his shoes and socks and handed him his notebook as you went about unpacking your picnic so he could pick at food if he wanted to.

With him settled in the shade you laid down, belly first in the sun. Picking up your pencil you scanned the park until you found an older man feeding the pigeons. Your eyes followed his movements for a few minutes before you started your sketch. The feeling of the warm sun on the back of your thighs as you twirled the pencil in your hand, capturing all the features of the man.

As you drew you could feel Axl’s eyes on you. At first it was just light glances every few minutes and then it turned to heavy long looks where his eyes were watching you. Ignoring the way his stares made you blush, chalking up the pinkness in your cheeks as just sun exposure.

A hand slid over your calf, over the back of your thighs before going over your dress and laying on the flat of your back. You turned your face upward looking at Axl watching you. His eyes flickering from your art up to your face. There was a pause, curiosity and interest in what he was going to do next. Your heart is beating in your chest even though your body is frozen, wondering what he was up to.

“Do you want to take a break and eat? You’ve been working for a couple hours.” Looking past him you saw the sun had changed position in the sky and time had gotten away from you. Sitting up you handed out sandwiches, positioning yourself comfortably besides him in the shade of the tree.

Axl had been following you for most of the spring and now into summer. He's around all the time and often comes along for days like this. But you liked having him around. You thought that he needed the quiet comfortable silence between the pair of you; so much of his life was filled with noise.

“Y/N, do you like this?” He asked, peeling off the crust to his sandwich. The action seemed to be more of a need to keep his hands busy instead of a dislike for the bed.

“Do I like this? Picnics in the park?” You didn’t know exactly what he meant. Axl sometimes seemed to talk in riddles not wanting to fully play all of his cards.

“Being with me.” He didn’t look up to meet your eyes at this, almost embarrassed to be talking about it. You weren’t like Axl. There was no need to talk in riddles or have him guessing how you felt.

“Of course I like having you around, Axl. It’s nice to be able to spend time with someone I like.” He looked up, almost surprised that someone would like to be around him. “I’ve had a crush on you for a few months and it’s nice to get to know you more and find more reasons to like you.” You didn’t feel nervous telling him this. It actually felt like a relief to get it off your chest.

He put down his sandwich, wiping crumbs off on his shirt and looking at his hands to make sure that they were clean. Before you could figure out what he was going to do he had a hand in your hair, tugging you closer to him in a soft kiss. For months you had been thinking about what it would be like to kiss him on one of your lazy afternoons together and now it was happening.

Instead of letting him pull away and think about what he had just done you slid onto his lap, letting your hands wrap around him. His free hand was on your back holding you close as the pair of you made out like teenagers under the shade of the willow tree.

Finally, the pair of you pulled away, swollen plush lips and wild curious eyes watching each other. This new change between the pair of you sparkling like wonder between the pair of you. Axl was playing with a piece of your hair, wrapping the brown lock around his finger like he had been wanting to do for months.

“Does this mean we can finally start dating?” You asked, watching the way he smirked at this question. “Because I don’t know how many more times you can just casually show up without Slash catching on. And I don’t know how many more picnics I can plan without touching you.” You admitted, his lips were on your chin and up your jaw.

“Mhhh, I’ve been waiting for this for so long and now I can have you all to myself.” His voice whispered huskily to you kissing your earlobe. He pulled away to look at you again. “You have to tell Slash.” He said, making you laugh as you rolled your eyes. If that’s what it would take to have Axl you didn’t mind telling your best friend about the relationship.

“You take care of me and I’ll take care of everything else, babe.” You promised, meaning it. This was everything that you had wanted for months and now you were getting it. The man that you had started falling for was yours. It had only taken months worth of picnics to get him.

[tricksters-captain]

Benedict Bridgerton imagines - Fire in the Water

AN: Requested by @mental-breaker-74​ - Fire in the water by Heist and Benedict Bridgerton - Love at first sight?

(Want to request your own character and song inspired imagine? Send me an ask!!)

(Y/N) - Your/Name

(Y/L/N) - Your/Last/Name

Pairing(s): Benedict Bridgerton x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1,020

Warnings: None, fluff

It was finally the social season! 

You had been preparing for months as it was your first season; the time you’d finally be introduced into society. 

You had been rereading old Lady Whistledown papers from the last social season just to see what men you should be wary of as many are infamous for being rakes. 

You felt yourself let out a shaky breath as you looked at yourself in the mirror.

“You okay, miss? Is the corset too tight?” Your chambermaid, Sally, asked. 

“No, it’s perfectly secure. Just some nerves, I suppose.” You smiled kindly at the woman as she helped you into your dress. 

“No need to be nervous, Miss (Y/L/N). You’ll be the belle of the ball.” Sally smiled back at you as she stepped away so you could have a final look. 

“You flatter me.” You blushed. 

You knew you probably wouldn’t be this season’s diamond but you had to admit you looked the best you’ve ever seen yourself that evening. 

“Come on, darling. We don’t want to be the last there.” Your mother entered your room and beckoned you to follow her.

It didn’t take long to get to Lady Danbury’s. It wasn’t a shock to find out she was hosting the first ball of the season. 

Your mother held your hand tightly as you entered the ballroom. She was just as anxious about your debut as you were. 

You found your dance card and tied it around your wrist. It started to fill up quickly from young gentleman and your mother watched you have your first dance with an unfaltering smile. She was so glad that you were mingling well. 

You smiled shyly at the young gentleman who took your hand for your second dance of the evening. 

Back at the entrance, the Bridgerton brothers finally made their appearance. 

“You’re late.” Violet said to the men as they approached their mother who was chaperoning Eloise and Francesca. 

“Well, we’re here now.” Anthony leant down and kissed his mothers hand. 

“I’d wager you’ll be late to your own wedding, brother.” Francesca smirked up at Anthony who just rolled his eyes. 

“Correction, sister, he’d have to be engaged to have a wedding. And if he keeps arriving late to these balls then all the good ones will be gone and he’ll be a bachelor forever.” Colin couldn’t help himself as he spoke up. “Speaking of, have you made any wagers on who the diamond of the season will be this year, Mother?”

“It’s a hard decision this year. Mrs (Y/L/N)’s daughter has made her debut this year and she didn’t fail to capture people attention when she made her entrance.” Violet subtly nodded in the direction of the young girl.

“I cannot wait to hear what Lady Whistledown will have to say about it.” Eloise chimed in. 

The men had all looked around to find the girl.

Benedict spotted her immediately. 

He felt his heart stop in his chest and his breathing hitch in his throat as he watched the beautiful young girl twirl on the dance floor. 

He didn’t even excuse himself from his families company before walking towards her. 

“Excuse me, Miss (Y/l/n)?” Benedict bowed his head as he greeted you. at the end of your dance. 

You knew who he was immediately. From his dark chestnut hair and his handsome features, you could tell this was a Bridgerton brother. They were infamous amongst the Ton.

“Lord Bridgerton.” You curtsied, greeting the brother. You knew this couldn’t be the viscount Bridgerton because of Lady Whistledown’s descriptions. Anthony was the oldest but Benedict, the second oldest, was taller. And this brother was very tall. It could only be Benedict. 

“May I have this next dance?” Benedict asked, but he took her hand before she could reply. 

As soon as your hand connected with his, you felt fire flood up your arm. You gasped quietly at the connection and Benedict felt it too. 

As the music started, Benedict spoke again. 

“I expect you’ll have many suitors come and call on you tomorrow.” 

“Is that so?” You blushed as you thought about one of those suitors possibly being him. 

“I reckon so.” Benedict smiled a boyish lopsided smile as he spun you. “You certainly have everyone’s attention.” 

“Including yours?” You didn’t know where this confidence was coming from but it just seemed so easy to speak to the man. 

“I am the one who forced you onto the dance floor, am I not?” Another smile from the man and you felt your heart flutter. 

“Lower your voice before the mama’s find out your weren’t on my dance card and we end up in Lady Whistledown.” You couldn’t help but smile back as you scolded the man. 

Benedict brought you closer to him, pressing his hand on the small of your back. 

“I think we may already have secured a sentence or two in Lady Whistledown without any scandal at all.” Benedict’s playful whisper made you laugh quietly. 

You danced for what felt like an hour together but in reality was just one song. 

It felt you two were the only ones there and Benedict’s eyes seemed to boar into you and nowhere else. 

You moved to the side of the ball room to fetch yourself a glass of lemonade and Benedict escorted you. 

His hand itched for his paper and pencil, he felt if he didn’t draw you that you’d disappear before his very eyes. 

“Perhaps I will be fortunate enough to see you tomorrow?” You asked quietly.

“Perhaps I will be fortunate enough for you to allow me to see you tomorrow?” Benedict smiled again. 

“Perhaps it’s what I want more than anything... if I am being bold.” You couldn’t help but feel drawn to the man and you were pretty certain it wasn’t just because of his good looks. 

Benedict took your hand and pressed his lips against your knuckles. 

“Then you will see me tomorrow.” 

Benedict excused himself and you felt yourself inhale deeply. You questioned whether that interaction really just happened or you had dreamt it...

AN: hope you like it!