#i have discovered that wrinkles are fun to render

[dynamo-deepblue]

what potions do to a mf

[spacecapart]

I've been really into some of my own OCs lately, so here's some Willas and a Sam! I've been using them as subjects while experimenting with some more complex marker rendering, and it's really rather fun to have some more proper drawings of these guys.

Willa, I've talked about a few times before - she's a character who originated as a mashup of two of my favourite soldier characters (Generals Ironwood and Armstrong, from RWBY and FMA respectively), and has since grown into very much her own person who I'm very fond of. She's the classic exhausted leader type who exists to be a side character in someone else's story but, as a middle-aged butch aroace woman in a society that doesn't value any of those traits very highly, she's sick fed up of being side-lined and Not Going To Take It Anymore. I love her, she's exhausted and cranky and stuck leading the fight in a war for survival that she's pretty sure can't be won by someone like her, but she's going to burn herself to the ground trying anyway.

The two drawings I did of her were mainly to figure out her face properly, and I ended up with one dramatic pose and one that's supposed to have the vibe of an official portrait. I always have far too much fun drawing wrinkles on faces, and I've recently discovered how fun it is to include details like freckles and red patches on skin with coloured pencil. I also experimented with inking some of the lines in colours other than black, and it's a subtle effect but I rather like it.

The fellow with the ginger hair is Sam, otherwise known as Dr Hargrave, and he's a supporting character in Willa's story as the chief medical officer at the wall fort she commands in the frozen north of their country (which is very loosely science-fantasy!Scotland), and also the closest thing she has to a best friend. If you've followed me for a while, he might look a bit familiar, and that's because Sam actually originated as Sammarion Harnendil, my half-elf life cleric DnD character, who I've drawn a bunch of times before. This version of Sam is slightly different (he's fully human, for one, although he still has big ears), but on a personality level he's exactly the same, which makes him cheerful, friendly, dad-joke-making and deeply devoted to being a doctor and helping people. Translating Sam's DnD stuff over into a different setting was actually what helped me pin down the nature of the magitech in this setting, and that magitech is the reason that Sam looks like he does despite being practically the same age as Willa. He's got some complicated accidental immortality going on, it's fun.

That drawing of him came about because of a screencap that I rather liked of one of the characters he's based on (Dr Harry Cunningham from Silent Witness), and I had a lot of fun drawing the folds and creases in his jumper. Sam's also the reason I've ended up so fond of adding pencil details to faces, ever since I decided he ought to have freckles when I was first designing him. I'm really pleased with how he turned out, especially since that's the first full colour drawing I've done of this version of the guy, and my first time drawing his face from that angle.

[masterjedilenawrites]

Blueberries and Cowboys: Chapter 2

A choose-your-own-adventure style fic. First, 2 platonic chapters for set-up/build-up. And then, the story will split into 2 paths depending on your romantic pairing preference: You and Thrawn, or You and Eli.

Chapter Masterlist

Chapter 2: The Plan

Pairing: None...yet...

Chapter Warnings: Mentions of bullying

Length: 2k

AO3 Link (In case you like it better over there, it’s okay, no judgement)

The rest of the week saw the three of you using every bit of free time outside your classes and studies to gather information for Thrawn to build a solid plan.

Eli tailed his pesky classmate Arden everywhere, even skipping a class one day to break into his dorm, trying to learn anything about the guy that could be useful to get him involved in the plot. Thrawn analyzed the simulation software and protocols that would be used to administer the tests, mapping out every possible way Commander Burdick could hijack it. And you were the one spying on the Burdick himself. Since the commander didn't seem too interested in your grades, you were able to shadow him without suspicion, and had been able to slip a bug into his offices to eavesdrop on any potential conversations about his plans for sabotage.

Your classmates and the staff were none the wiser. That was the advantage of being social outcasts. Half of them avoided you all like the plague, and the other half already thought you were weird people doing weird things. So it wasn't long before you'd all gotten enough intel to work with.

It was late in the evening at the end of the week. You found yourself in Thrawn and Eli's shared dorm, which looked identical to your own in the opposite wing, because the Empire couldn't bother with things like individuality or comfort. Eli sat on the edge of his top bunk, his legs swinging casually, and his coat unbuttoned to reveal a wrinkled undershirt you knew he hadn't bothered to wash all week. Thrawn paced about in the middle of the room, his long strides only allowing him about four good steps before he had to turn around. He still had his uniform on, boots and badges and all.

You leaned against the railing of the bed, watching Thrawn as he went back and forth. Sometimes he sat still when he was scheming, with his fingers steepled and his gaze seemingly reaching into some unknown dimension beyond your comprehension. That usually happened when he was running through variables that didn't concern you, at least from his perspective. You and Eli had accepted long ago there would always be parts of his plans he would never share with you. He was kind of a control freak like that.

But tonight, he seemed to be more welcoming of collaboration, hence his steady rhythm of pacing in front of you.

"Only one variable remains, as I see it," he was saying. "We understand how the commander will manipulate the system to cause a redundancy in the simulation, thus rendering the test impossible to finish successfully."

You and Eli shared a glance; the only person who truly understood how that was going to happen was Thrawn. He'd tried explaining numerous times but when it came to codes and tech, the two of you weren't able to fully keep up.

"We also know through your investigating," Thrawn motioned to you with what you thought was an impressed look, causing you to feel a little pride, "that the commander plans to only sabotage my test, believing it will be too suspicious if Eli also fails. He will also manipulate his false code to originate from the computer of his former lover Eva Carroway, who currently works in HR. So if an investigation does ensue, it will be traced to her and not him."

You and Eli chuckled under your breaths. It had been a little amusing when you'd discovered Commander Burdick was using this plan to not only undermine Thrawn, but also get revenge on his ex-girlfriend. But even more hilarious was how awkward Thrawn treated the subject. He had been quite perplexed to learn people could be so vindictive after a break-up. And any time he explained that detail of the plan, like he was doing now, he hesitated over his word choice. You couldn't tell if he only pretended to be confused about romantic relations, or if that was truly an area he found himself lost in.

If Thrawn noticed your snickering, he didn't respond to it, only continued to recap the plan. "We have also determined how we will expose the altered code naturally, so it does not cast suspicion on us... What was the word you used?"

"Backfire," said Eli.

"Yes. It would not due to have anyone suspect that we altered the test ourselves, or to have our concerns disregarded altogether. Thus, arranging for the maintenance crew to get a mild case of food poisoning so their performance checks are postponed to occur right before the tests will take care of that variable. At the least, they will fix the altered code and I will take the test as normal. At the most, they will report it and the commander faces expulsion."

"So..." said Eli through a yawn as he stretched. "What's left to work out, then?"

Now it was time for you and Thrawn to share a look.

"Were you not interested in involving your classmate, Arden Fey?" asked Thrawn in his soft, contemplative voice.

Eli shrugged. "Yeah. But Burdick's already got his scapegoat, his ex. So it'll be easier to keep him out of it. Whatever."

You could tell he was trying to be nonchalant. But just this morning, he had spent the entire walk between classes ranting about some new insults Arden had come up with, and how badly he wanted to show the guy up once and for all. You knew your friend wasn't feeling "whatever" about it.

"It's not a matter of ease or difficulty," Thrawn stated plainly. He had stopped pacing and was standing with hands behind his back, highlighting the broadness of his shoulders and the height of his stance. His presence seemed to fill up the whole room, and not for the first time, you were glad to be his friend and not his enemy.

"Yeah," you added in encouragement. "We just have to get creative. Find a way to make Arden a more appealing scapegoat than Burdick's ex. In fact...."

You trailed off as an idea occurred to you. You darted out of the room, surely leaving your two friends perplexed, but you would only be a second. You sprinted down the corridor toward the lifts, where a bulletin hung against the wall with fliers and pamphlets. One notice was a bit larger than the others, a promotion of an upcoming gala event to celebrate the Academy's anniversary. You ripped it off and went racing back to the boys' dorm room.

Eli had come down from the bunk and held a concerned look, probably prepared to follow you if you hadn't returned so quickly. Thrawn was still standing composed, but there was a curiosity in his eyes that made you smile.

You held up the poster in front of your chest. "What do you think the likelihood is of us playing successful matchmakers this week?"

Thrawn understood your idea almost immediately, looking down on you with a pleased smirk. It made you flush a little, to know the Chiss was impressed. You rarely had a chance to contribute good ideas when his mind worked so much faster than yours.

Eli caught on next, and he started to grin, the happiest you'd seen him in a while. His smile was infectious and you grinned back. Happy looked good on him.

"We know Eva's not shy with younger guys," you explained. "Before Burdick, she was fooling around with some intern in the med bay."

"And Arden's vain enough," added Eli. "If he thinks anyone's interested, he'll go for 'em."

"So we get him to ask her to the gala as his date...." you said.

"Burdick sees the two of them together...." said Eli.

"And realizes he can get back at his lover in another way, by pinning the sabotage on another student...." joined Thrawn.

The three of you stood together, proud and satisfied that yet another plan had finally worked out. It was almost worth the stressful studying and petty bullying and all the other unpleasant things you had to endure at this god-forsaken school, just to have fun moments like this with trusted friends.

"We should attend this gala as well," Thrawn said eventually, holding out a hand for the poster. He inspected it thoughtfully. "It is only a few days before the tests, so I hadn't planned to pay it any mind. But now...."

"Yeah, we should make sure Burdick's as jealous as we want 'im," nodded Eli.

You were secretly pleased. The plan was already a win-win, but now you would be able to go to the event yourself, too. You hadn't mentioned your desire to go to either of them before, figuring they weren't interested and not wanting to sound silly if you suggested it. But you did love dancing, and it was so very rare you got a chance to wear something other than your Imperial uniform.

"It's a dance," you noted, in case they couldn't tell by the details on the poster. "We'll need to go in pairs."

"I suppose it would make the most sense for you and Eli to go together," said Thrawn quietly.

You looked between the two, realizing both of them were flushed slightly. Eli's cheeks were dotted with pink, standing out amongst his dark brown features, while Thrawn had more of a purple tint to his face now, a color you'd never seen there before. You could feel yourself growing warm and uncomfortable as well. It was only a dance... only a way for you to enact a much more important plan... but it was the first time your trio had had to engage in anything other than platonic friendship. The balance of your group seemed to be shifting ever so slightly in this moment, and you had no way of knowing if it was for good or ill.

You cleared your throat, pushing away any feelings that might have been brewing in your chest, and instead calling focus back to the mission at hand.

"Actually, I think I'd better go with Thrawn. Whoever doesn't go with me would have to find their own date, and no offense Thrawn, but I think Eli has the better chance of asking someone else."

You hoped they hadn't noticed how hollow your voice sounded, how hard you were trying to keep yourself emotionless.

Eli was pinker than ever. "Uh, I highly doubt that..."

"You're not completely hated around here, you know," you said quickly. "Definitely not with the girls. You're not bad looking, you can be charming if you try, and you're... you know, human." You glanced at Thrawn and added again quietly, "No offense."

Thrawn shook his head. His color and demeanor had already slipped back into his usual neutral self. "No, I agree. Those are the dynamics of our peers and we must work with it. I will take you to the gala, Eli will find his own date, and all three of us will push Arden and Eva together as well. It's a good plan."

You all nodded in agreement. But there was a knot in your stomach, a nervousness you didn't quite understand. You cared very much for both Thrawn and Eli. They were your best friends, your only friends. As a group, you were bonded by your ostracism, protecting and supporting each other on your journey out of this hell-hole.

And separately, you had something special with each, too. You and Eli came from similar backgrounds, and had the same need to disconnect from your surroundings and just have a bit of fun every once in a while. The two of you had spent many late nights together, either hopping between bars, exploring the city, making each other laugh uncontrollably, or quietly sharing the honest thoughts you both buried far too deeply inside. Some nights you'd done all of the above, and returned to your dorm feeling both exhausted and renewed.

But Eli didn't always appreciate the finer things in life, and that's where you connected with Thrawn. He wasn't necessarily an optimist, but he had this way of noticing the beauty that existed everywhere around you, even in the most simple or mundane of moments. Everything had the potential to be interesting. His calm but strong presence had kept you grounded and sane throughout your studies here so far. Sometimes you would talk, other times you would simply be in the same space. And either way, you felt better about life.

You didn't exactly want your relationship with them to change. But you couldn't help but feel this gala would do just that....

Next Chapter: The Preparation >

Blueberry Path | Thrawn x reader

Cowboy Path | Eli x reader

[crystalirises]

Day 25: The Engineer

For day 25: Cogchamp!Fundy ---> Phoenix

Character: Okay, so, Cogchamp Fundy. So, I made it so that Cogchamp!Fundy is a bit of a researcher/inventor/engineer. As far as I am aware, he's the admin of the Cogchamp server, and I think it would be fun if he was a little bit smarter within the AU than he probably is in canon. So, here's the thing. Since I already revealed why all of the Fundys have been swapped, I wanted to make other Fundy characters who also have the ability to traverse the other dimensions. Cogchamp!Fundy is a researcher, and he would be happy to research dimension-hopping. So, he's one of the few Fundys that can/will have the possibility of gaining the ability of dimension-hopping.

Setting: Takes place in an AU I discussed with a friend in which Fundy is a Phoenix. Phil and Techno killed him in Cogchamp. They discovered he was a phoenix so they took him away and named him Zag since he had no memory of who he previously was because he reverted back to a baby when he died.

Ao3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/34203535/chapters/86502286

“Uhhhhh, maybe we can talk about this?”

He looked down at the sharp netherite axe that was pressed against his throat, a weary grin on his face as he stared up at the piglin hybrid that had cornered him in the room that he’d woken up in.

“Where is Zagreus?”

“The god that died and came back?!” Fundy wrinkled his nose, “I don’t know!”

“Wrong answer.” The axe slammed into his neck.

---

“That is not Zagreus, mate.”

Phil stared at the stranger in his grandson’s bed, neck still stitching together as the fox hybrid’s body continued to heal itself. Techno shrugged, wiping the blood from his blade. Phil ran a hand through the stranger’s hair, reminiscent of how Zag’s hair used to be in another life. “I found him here. He couldn’t explain where Zagreus was. Hence, I settled on rendering him unconscious.”

“Good call, mate.”

Phil pursed his lips, his wings ruffling. This stranger was not Zagreus, but…

“He looks like Fundy.”

---

“I’m Fundy.”

Techno snorted. They already deciphered that little fact. He and Phil were seated across from Fundy, the fox hybrid’s hands chained to the table to keep him from fleeing. Techno had taken the time to sort through the inventions that were in the fox hybrid’s pockets, having even found a small explosive among the small trinkets. This stranger, Fundy or not, was clearly dangerous.

“I’m guessing I’m not in my world, am I?”

That was obvious. He casted a weary glance towards Phil, his friend’s wings were still ruffled at the thought that Zagreus was gone. Avians were rare, immortal ones even moreso. While Phil had told him he was a crow, Techno knew his friend was more than a crow Avian. He was immortal, not just a mere crow Avian. Phil had been happy to have Fundy, a phoenix Avian.

“I’m afraid not, mate.” Phil mirthlessly chuckled, “You have no clue where Zag is?”

“Nope.” Fundy popped the ‘p,’ shrugging like he wasn’t all that bothered that he was practically a prisoner. Techno found this version of his nephew quite odd. When he’d first woken up after Techno had killed him, Fundy had jokingly laughed and said that he was going to have neck aches for the next few hours. He didn’t seem to care that he’d died at all. The fox hybrid leaned against his chair, head tilting back and forth. “I could find him. I need to get back to Cogchamp anyway. It’s pretty easy to construct a portal between worlds, my younger brother showed me how. Shit… is this like… a phenomenon that’s occured in all the dimensions? I should check—”

“You’re from… Cogchamp?”

“Yep!” Fundy grinned, a bit of pride shining in his eyes, “Heard of it?”

Techno and Phil exchanged a short glance. They’d buried it under rubble. Hence, yes, they’ve heard of the City of Cogchamp. They weren’t about to reveal this information to Fundy, however. If this Fundy came from a world where he stayed, or perhaps was even born, in Cogchamp, then it would hold no benefit to them if he were to ever find out what they’d done to this world’s version of Cogchamp. “We’ve… heard of the City of Cogchamp, yes. My grandson, he’s unfortunately gone now, told us about the city. He used to live there before… well…”

Before he died and reverted into Zagreus.

“Oh, uh, sorry to hear that.” Despite the mention of death, Fundy’s grin was still present on his face. He nodded, as if coming to an agreement in his head. “I could help you. Besides, this is a great event to study. I need to get home, yeah, but I’d like to research about the other universes.”

“Can you bring Zagreus home?”

“Sure can!” Fundy’s smile grew brighter, tail wagging in excitement. Phil’s wings fluttered, a sigh of relief escaping the Avian hybrid’s lips. Techno could understand Phil’s worry. Fundy was just like Phil, an immortal Avian, and while Techno could never die, Phil wanted someone like him. They had both been surprised when Fundy first died and red wings sprouted from his back.

“But, uh… Before I help you…”

Fundy chuckled, glancing down at his hands. “Could you, uh, free me now, please?”

=============================================================

I just think Cogchamp!Fundy doesn't fear death

I don't know

He just deserves it

[aion-rsa]

Venom 2 Trailer Breakdown – All the Marvel and Carnage References

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

Folks, we live in interesting times. We just received a trailer for Venom: Let There Be Carnage, the sequel to the surprise 2018 hit Venom, starring Tom Hardy, Tom Hardy, and a whole lot of people who weren’t trying nearly as hard as Tom Hardy. This sequel brings in Woody Harrelson as Broadway star Carnage about 30 years after his comic book debut.

Seriously, though. Carnage appeared in a Broadway musical ten years before he got to be in the movies. I’ll never get over that.

If you haven’t watched the crazy trailer yet, press pause on your Green Jelly CD and check this out.

What can we gather from this trailer?

THE RETURN OF THE BROMANCE

The Venom symbiote has become more acclimated to life on Earth, going so far as learning at least a little Chinese and getting into cooking. If that’s what you call it. Eddie Brock simply has to endure it best he can.

Fun fact: the 2004 comic book miniseries Venom vs. Carnage (by Peter Milligan and Clayton Crain) was the first time anyone’s played with the fun concept of a symbiote and its host acting like an old married couple. In that comic, a delightful scene had Cletus Kasady ironing his shirt while having a lovers’ spat with his symbiote.

Also, while Venom’s love for chocolate was hinted at at the end of the first movie, the two-in-one vigilante is more adamant about it this time around. During the character’s ’90s antihero run, it was explained that there’s a chemical in both chocolate and brain matter that the symbiote needs to thrive. Eating chocolate keeps Venom from wanting to eat brains.

Anyway, chipper Venom gives me life.

CARNAGE IS HERE

Continuing from where the last movie left off, Cletus Kasady is locked up and will only confide in Eddie Brock. While we’re left wondering how we get from point A to point B with Cletus becoming a symbiote host, we at least dive straight into the big hero/villain cliché about how similar they are.

Director Andy Serkis goes into more detail on this with some trailer commentary: “They both had strange upbringings with strange relationships with their parents and their families. And there’s an inherent loneliness that they both recognize in each other. Cletus actually reaches out and will only speak to Eddie Brock. That’s at the beginning of the story, we learned that he’s the only one he’ll speak to. And the cops, therefore, want Eddie to go in and investigate and try and discover where some of the bodies, some of the many bodies of Cletus’s victims are.”

I miss his Sideshow Bob wig.

SHRIEK HAS ARRIVED

Naomie Harris is shown as an inmate at Ravencroft, an asylum regularly used in Marvel Comics. She appears to be portraying Frances Barrison, otherwise known as Shriek.

Introduced in the Maximum Carnage story, Shriek was created to be a love interest for Carnage. The Mallory to his Mickey, if you will. In the comics, she’s a mutant with powers allowing her to fly, shoot sonic blasts, and darken people’s personalities.

The abusive couple have teamed up various times, most notably in Maximum Carnage where they were joined by the Spider Doppelganger, Demogoblin, and Carrion. The former (a six-armed monster version of Spider-Man) is the only one of the three with any real staying power, usually being treated by Shriek as either her child or her dog.

ANNE WEYING IS STILL AROUND

Michelle Williams returns as Anne Weying, Eddie’s former fiancée. The last movie ended with Venom (and Stan Lee) insisting Eddie would win her back. She’s last been seen with a supportive and successful boyfriend and Eddie’s personal life is still kind of a mess. It will take a lot to get Anne to go back to Eddie the way things are.

Besides, she probably wouldn’t enjoy finding out that he lied to her about Venom’s survival. Screwing with her trust is what got Eddie into this mess in the first place.

DETECTIVE MULLIGAN

Patrick Mulligan. Now that’s a deep cut. Remember earlier when I was talking about the miniseries Venom vs. Carnage? Said story was about introducing Toxin, the spawn of Carnage. Officer Mulligan became the host for the newly-born creature. With that origin story and a six-issue miniseries from the mid-00s, Mulligan tried to train his symbiote, which meant well, but was violent and naïve about how the world works.

Really, the Toxin miniseries is the blueprint for Eddie and Venom’s cinematic relationship. Too bad Mulligan was presumably killed off-panel so they could move the Toxin symbiote onto different hosts, including Eddie himself for a time.

Now that I think about it, the closest thing Toxin had to an arch-nemesis was Razor Fist. The same Razor Fist that will show up in Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings. See? Now their war lives on on another battlefield.

THE DAILY BUGLE AND…THE AVENGERS?

We have another article discussing how this brief moment in the trailer decides whether or not the Venom movies take place in the MCU. After all, this shot of Mulligan reading The Daily Bugle shows it as a newspaper, which doesn’t really line up with how it’s portrayed in the MCU.

There is an interesting wrinkle in this, though. When Mulligan angrily crushes the newspaper, there’s a very, very brief look at a headline from inside the paper. The two words visible seem to say “AVENGERS” and “NIGHTMARE.” Possibly “AVENGERS LEVEL NIGHTMARE.”

This could be nothing more than an Easter egg, but considering Morbius is supposed to take place in the MCU due to Vulture showing up in the trailer and Morbius is apparently part of the “Venomverse,” I guess we can just say that the Venom movies aren’t part of the MCU…until they are.

Speaking of Easter eggs, notice the wanted poster for E. Larson. Erik Larsen is the comic artist credited for giving Venom the gnarly face of fangs with gross tongue.

VENOM’S KATANA?

There’s one shot where Venom’s carrying something and…it looks like it’s a katana? What in the hell?

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

I mean, I’m absolutely for it, but it’s not like Venom’s really known for going all Samurai Jack (he’s more Aku, really). This is like when Juggernaut had a bazooka in that Konami X-Men arcade game. He really didn’t need it, but we’re better for it!

The post Venom 2 Trailer Breakdown – All the Marvel and Carnage References appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/2RarY0D

[capricornus-rex]

Playing Pretend (3)

Requested by @calkesttiss​ | Prompt:

Hi! I just watched isi & ossi (rich girl and poor boxer boy AH) on netflix and now i cant stop thinking about cal and fake dating. Do with that what you will 😂

Cal Kestis x Reader

1 | 2 | Next: Part 4 | Masterlist

3 of ?

The next morning, you’ve slept in. The first thing your puffy eyes see was Tazha sitting by your dresser stool and touching every single bottle on the table. You sat up but that still didn’t get her attention.

“Since when have you been here?”

Tazha turned her head to you, she exclaimed as if she was surprised to see you awake.

“Well, good morning, sunshine!”

You lay back to your bed but Tazha prompt stood up, marched towards you and pulled away the blanket from your body.

“Ohhh no, you’ve been asleep for far too long!”

Your eyelids shot up and flicked to Tazha.

“What time is it?”

Tazha snatched up the clock on your nightstand and showed the time right in front of you. You groaned and rubbed the bridge of your nose.

“What’d you do last night?”

She wasn’t expecting you to smile and scoff through your nostrils. Tazha tilted her head in confusion as she studied your expression.

“Crazy night, I’ll tell you more in a bit,”

You stood up to go to the bathroom and wash your face. By the time you came back out to rejoin Tazha, you narrated everything that happened right after your conversation via the holotable ended. She is the only person who knows your nightly escapades. You mentioned your run-in with your new friend.

“Well, it sounds like you two had fun kicking the asses out of those muggers,”

“He was probably judging my fighting techniques. I was still sloppy,”

Tazha stands up from your bedside.

“Come on. Our dads are downstairs, they’re probably working on the party that you told me about. Get dressed.”

The conversation was indistinct but audible from your bedroom in the second floor, both you and Tazha arrived in the living room where her father and yours were discovering over business matters. You didn’t last long in the living room, you dragged Tazha away to the smaller dining hall where you usually make your own food. She sat by the barstool on the center island, watching you rummage and fix up something to eat.

“Why don’t you call one of your cooks to do it for you?”

“No, it’s fine. Not everything I need has to be done by someone else,”

When you settled down on a seat opposite Tazha, she immediately saw the firm expression painted all over your face.

“What have they talked about so far, Tazha?”

“I’ve only heard much,”

“Like what? Start from the very beginning,”

Tazha started off with the part that obviously her family is invited to your father’s party, she got to the better and relevant parts—one of which is that she had picked up a name from their conversation earlier while you were asleep.

“They’ve invited the Ithrels. Your dad said something like sponsor or something,”

“He’s made the Ithrel family his sponsors,” you deduced.

“You make it sound like that’s a bad thing,”

“Just a feeling. Thanks for covering for me, Tazha,”

Today was a busy day for your parents. You were left alone in the dark as you watch them confer with one another and with different people via the living room holotable. As a child, it was something you never understood, it was also the reason why you felt estranged from them—despite giving you what you could ever want and need or both.

Why did they always choose to speak with projections of people through a machine over their own daughter in the flesh who is always watching them from the door?

There was very little interaction between you and your parents. Perhaps the only interaction you’ve had so far from either of them was your mother calling for you to go to the atelier room. When you got there, five people who introduced themselves as designers lined up in front of you. Beside them was a mannequin wearing a dress of their making.

“I had them called here because I want you to pick out a dress for your father’s banquet.”

None of the dresses seemed to impress you. You approached every single one, each designer either smiled at you or stiffened from nervousness—probably because your approval was their prize, a ridiculous competition.

Your fingers felt the fabric of each dress, your hand slid down to the skirts’ lengths, and then you move on to the next dress. They were beautiful indeed. But you’ve no need of them, other girls could’ve felt like royalty for a night in dresses like those. To spite your mother, you twirled to face her and give your verdict.

“Sorry, but I believe I have more than enough dresses for a party like this,”

You crossed your arms. Wrinkles appeared on Yasina’s forehead upon hearing your answer. The designers were just as confused themselves.

“I beg your pardon?”

“Mom, there’s so much dresses in my wardrobe that I practically need a warehouse! I think I have enough to choose from in my closet instead of this. Send them back. Have them make a dress for you if that makes you feel any better,”

It all happened so fast for your mother, you walked out and headed for your room, realizing that there isn’t much to do in your own house.

“They’re probably too busy to even care that I’m gone,” you muttered it to yourself with great scorn, lousily tying your hair in a messy ponytail and then proceeded to march out of the house.

You were on your way to downtown again. You put on the hood of your poncho and suddenly you were one of the common faces in the crowd. The destination was your favorite pub, back in the Tipsy Taun-Taun.

The Balosar barkeeper greeted you as soon as you entered.

“You’re early,”

“Whatever, I’m a paying customer.”

“Just sayin’.”

He said he’ll be whipping up a glass of Merenzane Gold for you, but you stopped him there and ordered a glass of Meiloorun Juice instead.

“Aww, so the little princess got a hangover?” the Balosar jeered.

“No, I didn’t!”

The keeper proceeded to make your drink, you searched for a seat; the place is so much quieter in the day than in the night. Nonetheless, you enjoyed it either time of the day. When the drink was ready, Balosar called your name and you stood up from your table. As you were about to reach for the drink, another patron—a Devaronian—snatched it and finished it in a single gulp. It all happened in a flash that you still took a minute to process what he just did.

“That was my drink!”

“Tab’s on you, missy,”

You whipped out your blaster from the flap of your poncho, you clicked the safety and pointed the barrel at his nape. His chuckle sounded more like a grumble.

“Ooh, I’m scared. What’s the little princess gonna do with a big boy’s gun?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know, ass-wipe?”

That struck a chord on the hulking Devaronian, he swung his arm and flicked away the blaster from your hand. He raised his arms in a charging attack at you, you dodged soon enough that his clenched fists landed on a table, partially shattering it in the middle; you got your blaster back and attempted to aim the blaster at him, but your hands were trembling so much that the shot merely grazed his waist. He howled in pain but immediately shrugged it off.

You were doing well in dodging the enemy’s blows, swinging his left and right arm alternately which you cleanly ducked from.

“Stay still and let me claw that pretty little face!” he roared.

A large glass bottle shattered on the back of the Devaronian’s head. The impact wasn’t hard enough to render him unconscious, although it stunned him enough to lower his defenses. When he turned around, much to your surprise, it was Cal.

“We gotta stop meeting like this,” he casually said despite the mood of the predicament.

“I strongly agree,”

Once again, you two were a tag team. It was now two against one. Normally, a Devaronian thug could take two humans no problem. But apparently that urban belief betrays the Devaronian. He was bombarded with your kicks, using anything around you as a weapon against him, Cal wasn’t using his lightsaber but his fists and he threw them so hard that you could hear the impact land on the enemy’s cheek.

Cal was the one to deliver the last blow. The Devaronian fell to the floor, the barkeeper leaned over the bar to check the knocked-out patron.

“Yep, he’s out cold, alright!”

“Thanks… again,”

“You’re welcome… again.”

A brief pause between the two of you, and the Balosar is just there standing awkwardly.

“Let me buy you a drink,” you gently tapped Cal on the chest with the back of your hand, then you turned to the Balosar. “The last one isn’t on me, understood?”

You ordered the same drink for the two of you. Like last night, both of you talked over anything that you could think of.

“Where did you learn to fight?” he asked after taking a sip.

You stammered, “Oh, uh… I had a trainer but only for a short while. Then I picked up some more moves by myself—it’s been like that ever since,”

“Hey, there’s room for improvement,”

“Was I sloppy?”

Cal shrugged and avoided the question by chugging all of what’s left of his drink. Your lips pursed a smile. You finished yours as well, you tossed a credit to the barkeeper.

“Follow me,”

“What?”

“Come on!”

Both of you left the bar and Cal followed you to the backstreets one block away from the pub. You scaled the buildings and ended up in the rooftop.

“What are we doing here?”

“I was hoping you’d teach me, since you fight better than I do.”

“It’s gonna take some time,”

“I don’t care,”

Cal saw that there is no other way in getting around with you. You were your own brand of stubborn, but he felt that you got spirit. The rest of the day was spent with Cal training you basic combat moves in case of street fights and cantina brawls like yesterday and today.

“So, where you from around these parts?”

Your fighting stance softened when he asked that question, you knew you had to make up the vaguest possible answer quick.

“Oh… a little far from here,”

“Do you hang around here more often?”

“Yeah,”

He stopped asking questions and continued giving you pointers on how to dodge, take the upper hand, and exploit an enemy’s weakness. The session lasted until dusk, you didn’t even notice the time pass. You hurried to leave the rooftop, leaving a confused Cal watching you run away from his vantage point.

“And there you go again,” he muttered under his breath.

“Boo-woop!”

“Yeah... I guess she’s kinda cute,”

A small smirk curled at the corner of his lip.

[absolute-immunities]

Joan Didion:

More and more, as the literature of the movement began to reflect the thinking of women who did not really understand the movement’s ideological base, one had the sense of this stall, this delusion, the sense that the drilling of the theorists had struck only some psychic hardpan dense with superstitions and little sophistries, wish fulfillment, self-loathing and bitter fancies. To read even desultorily in this literature was to recognize instantly a certain dolorous phantasm, an imagined Everywoman with whom the authors seemed to identify all too entirely. This ubiquitous construct was everyone’s victim but her own. She was persecuted even by her gynecologist, who made her beg in vain for contraceptives. She particularly needed contraceptives because she was raped on every date, raped by her husband, and raped finally on the abortionist’s table. During the fashion for shoes with pointed toes, she, like “many women,” had her toes amputated. She was so intimidated by cosmetics advertising that she would sleep “huge portions” of her day in order to forestall wrinkling, and when awake she was enslaved by detergent commercials on television. She sent her child to a nursery school where the little girls huddled in a “doll corner,” and were forcibly restrained from playing with building blocks. Should she work she was paid “three to ten times less” than an (always) unqualified man holding the same job, was prevented from attending business lunches because she would be “embarrassed” to appear in public with a man not her husband, and, when she traveled alone, faced a choice between humiliation in a restaurant and “eating a doughnut” in her hotel room.

The half-truths, repeated, authenticated themselves. The bitter fancies assumed their own logic. To ask the obvious—why she did not get herself another gynecologist, another job, why she did not get out of bed and turn off the television set, or why, the most eccentric detail, she stayed in hotels where only doughnuts could be obtained from room service—was to join this argument at its own spooky level, a level which had only the most tenuous and unfortunate relationship to the actual condition of being a woman. That many women are victims of condescension and exploitation and sex-role stereotyping was scarcely news, but neither was it news that other women are not: nobody forces women to buy the package.

But of course something other than an objection to being “discriminated against” was at work here, something other than an aversion to being “stereotyped” in one’s sex role. Increasingly it seemed that the aversion was to adult sexual life itself: how much cleaner to stay forever children. One is constantly struck, in the accounts of lesbian relationships which appear from time to time in movement literature, by the emphasis on the superior “tenderness” of the relationship, the “gentleness” of the sexual connection, as if the participants were wounded birds. The derogation of assertiveness as “machismo” has achieved such currency that one imagines several million women too delicate to deal at any level with an overtly heterosexual man. Just as one had gotten the unintended but inescapable suggestion, when told about the “terror and revulsion” experienced by women in the vicinity of construction sites, of creatures too “tender” for the abrasiveness of daily life, too fragile for the streets, so now one was getting, in the later literature of the movement, the impression of women too “sensitive” for the difficulties of adult life, women unequipped for reality and grasping at the movement as a rationale for denying that reality. The transient stab of dread and loss which accompanies menstruation simply never happens: we only thought it happened, because a male-chauvinist psychiatrist told us so. No woman need have bad dreams after an abortion: she has only been told she should. The power of sex is just an oppressive myth, no longer to be feared, because what the sexual connection really amounts to, we learn in one woman’s account of a postmarital affair presented as liberated and liberating, is “wisecracking and laughing” and “lying together and then leaping up to play and sing the entire Sesame Street Songbook.” All one’s actual apprehension of what it is like to be a woman, the irreconcilable difference of it—that sense of living one’s deepest life underwater, that dark involvement with blood and birth and death—could now be declared invalid, unnecessary, one never felt it at all.

One was only told it, and now one is to be reprogrammed, fixed up, rendered again as inviolate and unstained as the “modern” little girls in the Tampax advertisements. More and more we have been hearing the wishful voices of just such perpetual adolescents, the voices of women scarred not by their class position as women but by the failure of their childhood expectations and misapprehensions. “Nobody ever so much as mentioned” to Susan Edmiston “that when you say *I do,’ what you are doing is not, as you thought, vowing your eternal love, but rather subscribing to a whole system of rights, obligations and responsibilities that may well be anathema to your most cherished beliefs.” To Ellen Peck “the birth of children too often means the dissolution of romance, the loss of freedom, the abandonment of ideals to economics.” A young woman described on the cover of New York as “The Suburban Housewife Who Bought the Promises of Women’s Lib and Came to the City to Live Them” tells us what promises she bought: “The chance to respond to the bright lights and civilization of the Big Apple, yes. The chance to compete, yes. But most of all, the chance to have some fan. Fun is what’s been missing.”

Eternal love, romance, fun. The Big Apple. These are relatively rare expectations in the arrangements of consenting adults, although not in those of children, and it wrenches the heart to read about these women in their brave new lives. An ex-wife and mother of three speaks of her plan to “play out my college girl’s dream. I am going to New York to become this famous writer. Or this working writer. Failing that, I will get a job in publishing.” She mentions a friend, another young woman who “had never had any other life than as a daughter or wife or mother” but who is “just discovering herself to be a gifted potter.” The childlike resourcefulness—to get a job in publishing, to become a gifted potter!—bewilders the imagination. The astral discontent with actual lives, actual men, the denial of the real generative possibilities of adult sexual life, somehow touches beyond words. “It is the right of the oppressed to organize around their oppression as they see and define it” the movement theorists insist doggedly in an effort to solve the question of these women, to convince themselves that what is going on is still a political process, but the handwriting is already on the wall. These are converts who want not a revolution but “romance,” who believe not in the oppression of women but in their own chances for a new life in exactly the mold of their old life. In certain ways they tell us sadder things about what the culture has done to them than the theorists ever did, and they also tell us, I suspect, that the movement is no longer a cause but a symptom.

[hayleysstark]

Title: Anniversary Words: 11178 Warnings: Swearing + vomiting  Summary: Arthur's birthday isn't really his favorite time of year, for obvious reasons, but Merlin is going to fix that. Provided this pesky little cold of his doesn't get in the way, of course. One-shot. Post-S4. Merlin-gets-sick-and-tries-to-hide-it fic. Arthur's probably OOC.  Notes:  WHY IS THIS,,,,,,,,,,,, SO LONG,,,,,,,,,, I,,,,,,,,,, AM SORRY,,,,,,,,, I JUST,,,,,,,,,, KEPT GOING? dfhjtrfghgfgf oH MY GOD i am SO SORRY like,,,,,, shut the fuck up, onceandfuturewarlock. oh, god, I'm sorry. why is this so long. oh, also, fun fact yes I did get the idea of Merlin and the others giving Arthur a sheath for Excalibur off the myth! we're going to pretend in this version that Merlin cast a thousand protective enchantments over that sheath to render Arthur practically unkillable when he wears it lmao. MERLIN IS TAKING NO CHANCES WITH HIS DUMBASS KING ALL RIGHT. ONCE AND FUTURE KING? ARTHUR PENDRAGON IS THE ONCE AND FUTURE DUMBASS AND MERLIN IS TAKING NO CHANCES WITH THIS BITCH. oh god i'm sorry this note is almost a big a disaster as this story.

Read on Fanfiction and AO3. 

Merlin was up to something.

Well, all right, fine, the idiot usually was up to something—mouthing off to esteemed guests or skiving off his chores to go to the tavern or calling Arthur a prat or accidentally instigating full-scale, free-for-all, every-man-for-himself prank wars between the knights—and the fool still tried to insist, to this day, that he'd had absolutely nothing to do with any of it, and it had all just gotten a bit out of hand and it was only an accident, but Arthur knew better than to believe him—no one else in the kingdom was imbecilic enough to set his own hair on fire, and leave Gwaine covered in gravy in the courtyard and hang Percival's unmentionables from the castle battlements—

Arthur suppressed the memory with a shudder—no use dwelling on that. Best to just be grateful everything had sorted itself out in the end, and a few hours in the stocks had more than helped Merlin learn his lesson.

Well. The fact remained. Merlin was up to something.

He'd been on time every day this week, for a start—no, no, rephrase, he hadn't just been getting up on time, he'd been getting up on time without any sort of outside prompting—Gaius was gone, off treating that village in the north, struck down so suddenly and violently by that mysterious, fast-spreading fever, and hadn't been there to wake his ward—for an entire week, he hadn't been there to wake his ward—and, on top of it all, Merlin had assumed nearly all the duties of a physician while the actual physician was away, dressing wounds and brewing draughts—and hadn't said a single word about it, either—Arthur himself wouldn't even know if he hadn't seen Merlin making Gaius' usual rounds about the castle and the town—and the man still managed to keep up with his regular tasks as well, rousing Arthur and Guinevere at sunrise every morning with a tray of breakfast in his hands and a bright smile on his face.

And it wasn't just that.

Merlin had taken to disappearing lately, too—and not like the way he usually disappeared, for hours or even entire days at a time, then came back looking exhausted and pathetic and more than a little drunk—his absence these days lasted only a few moments, here and there, and he returned with a big dopey grin on his face, and then insisted he'd been right there the whole time and Arthur was just an oblivious clotpole and he wasn't grinning at all.

The worst of it was, Arthur had started to suspect that he'd dragged the knights, and Guinevere even, in on it, too.

The way everyone had taken to looking at him lately, especially when they thought he wasn't looking at them—the smiles that dropped off their faces the instant they locked eyes with him and the fleeting half-glances they exchanged when they crossed paths in the corridors and the hasty, whispered conversations they thought he didn't know about just before he rounded a corner or entered a room—Merlin was up to something, and he'd let everyone in on it except Arthur himself, and it—

—it sort of stung.

No, no, that wasn't the right word—Arthur couldn't care less—let Merlin have his secrets—his mysterious disappearances—his hushed conferences and personal jests with the knights—so long as he wasn't distracting the men from their training, or their defense of the kingdom, it didn't matter one way or the other—Arthur absolutely did not feel even the slightest bit excluded or lonely just because his servant had—what? Grown a bit closer with his knights without his notice? Stopped paying attention to him? Become a damn sight better at his job?

No. Absolutely not.

As a matter of fact, he was quite glad of it—Merlin's cheerful, inane prattle was the absolute last thing he needed at the best of times—now, with his anniversary on the morrow, he had bigger things to worry about—the preparations for the feast alone had taken up nearly a month, and the end to it all couldn't come fast enough, in his opinion.

He just wanted it all to be over.

Well, all right, truth be told, he didn't want there to be a feast at all, but he'd discovered, time and again these past few years, that ruling a kingdom meant it mattered very little what he wanted, even when what he wanted was to just not celebrate the day his father had taken the blow meant for him, and died in front of him—died because of him—just like his mother—

No.

Arthur swallowed and shut his eyes.

He was not opening that door, not tonight.

He would go to sleep—he shifted a little closer to Guinevere, seeking her steadying presence as much as her warmth—and he would not think about anything else, not his mother leaving this world so he could enter it, or his father's life drawing to a close so his could continue—no, he would not think about it—he would get this horrible feast over with, and he would be okay, and he would breathe again.

He would be okay.

Or, at least, he would make damn sure no one else knew that he wasn't.

He sank a little deeper into his pillow, and willed sleep to come.

"Rise and shine!"

Arthur swallowed a groan, shifting groggily in the sheets as the sunlight struck him, and the world behind his tightly closed eyes—rather rudely, in his opinion—turned orange. No, no, it couldn't possibly be morning—not already—he could swear it had only been moments since he'd last shut his eyes—just a few more minutes—he buried his face in the nearest pillow—just a few more minutes, and he'd drag himself up—he reached blindly for Guinevere, aching for the comfort of her skin against his, but his fingers found only empty, cold sheets, and Arthur was suddenly very awake.

"Where's Guinevere?" He sat upright, squinting slightly from the sun's dazzling glare.

"Oh, she's already up. Waiting for us, actually," Merlin said breezily, as though this didn't just answer one question, and open up about a dozen more. "Come on, then, let's have you, lazy daisy!" He even had the nerve to throw in a grin.

Arthur didn't move, only fixed the servant with his best scowl. "I've no time for your riddles, Merlin. Where is Guinevere?"

"I've just told you. Waiting for us. Hurry up and get dressed, and we'll set out." Merlin gathered up the jumble of freshly-laundered fabric from the end of the bed, and tossed it at the king.

Arthur caught the clothes deftly and frowned—this couldn't be right—his third-best tunic, and riding breeches? Either Merlin was deliberately trying to lose his job, or he'd mucked up again. Perhaps he was on the cider. "This isn't—where's my—my good cloak? My ceremonial mail?"

"Oh, you won't be needing it." The corners of Merlin's mouth twitched, threatening another smile.

"Quit fooling around, Merlin!" Arthur lobbed the clothes back at the younger man—he could hear the stocks calling the idiot's name, and it wasn't even noon. "I've a feast to attend in eight hours, and you are not helping—!"

"Oh, the feast was cancelled."

Arthur stopped short. "What?"

"The feast," Merlin repeated, handing the clothes back to him. "It was cancelled."

"It can't have gotten!" Arthur yanked the garments from the other's hands, and dropped them in a heap on the wrinkled sheets before he clambered from the bed to look Merlin full in the face. "That feast was weeks in the planning! How on earth—?"

"I said we should cancel it." Merlin knelt to grab a few dirty tunics up from the floor, and stuffed them hurriedly in the laundry basket before he straightened up and grinned at Arthur. "Gwen agreed with me."

"Don't—don't be ridiculous, Merlin," Arthur sputtered—idiot really was on the cider, then. There was just no other explanation. "You're a servant. You can't just walk right up to the queen and say you think a feast should be cancelled, and—"

"But I wasn't speaking as a servant." Suddenly, Merlin wasn't smiling anymore—there was a strange, steely, steady sort of look in his eyes, and a tight, grim set to his mouth. "I was speaking as a friend."

And Arthur—

—Arthur didn't have anything to say to that.

No, actually, he had about a thousand things to say to that, starting with don't be an idiot, Merlin and maybe a we aren't friends from there, perhaps a stop being such a girl for good measure—but the words wouldn't come, sticking somewhere in the back of his throat, so he just stood there, like an utter fool, silent and still and stupidly blinking at Merlin.

"You've not been yourself lately, Arthur." Merlin hefted the basket up from the floor and set it on the edge of the bed, bracing a hand on either side to steady it. "Gwen's beginning to worry about you." He lifted his head, and locked eyes with the king. "We all are."

Arthur's face burned, mouth going dry—a furious heat blazed in his cheeks, skin scorching all the way up to his ears and down to his neck—in the vivid glow of the new dawn, there was no way Merlin didn't see the flush—how had the man noticed? How had any of them noticed? He'd done everything he could to ensure they didn't notice—done everything he could to keep his burdens to himself—to let them see would be to weigh them down—and they had all already carried so much for him—and they had all, it seemed, decided to bear still more, and it was suddenly near impossible to swallow.

"We all know this has been hard for you, Arthur," Merlin left the basket, tottering unsteadily on the edge of the bed, and took several steps closer to the king. "And we know why. We just—" he hesitated, biting down, hard, on his bottom lip. "We just wanted," he said at last, "to make things a bit easier on you."

"S-so—" Arthur finally forced himself to speak, but stumbled all the same over the words. Gods, he sounded like a—like a dollophead. "—so, the feast, it's—?"

"Cancelled," Merlin finished—a tentative smile half-tugged at the corner of his lip. "But you've still got a bit of a day ahead of you, Sire, so I'd suggest you get dressed for it." He gestured to the clothes, still scattered untidily on the unmade bed.

Logic said Arthur should probably be furious right about now—should probably order Merlin down to the stocks, if he was feeling merciful enough, and the dungeons if he wasn't—put the servant in his place, then call the feast back on—logic said he should set everything to rights—logic said he should be angry—but—oh, hell—

"Th-thank you, Merlin."

And then, like the absolute girl he was, Merlin just had to go and beam at him like he'd set the stars in the sky with his own two hands—Arthur rolled his eyes and huffed, and hoped with everything inside him that Merlin did not notice the flush returning to his cheeks—change of topic, change of topic—quick, before the idiot tried to turn things sappy—

"Where has Guinevere got to, by the way?" He grabbed the clothes up off the bed, quietly grateful for something to do with his hands, and stepped behind the dressing screen—he stripped off his trousers, and flung them over the top of the screen, biting back a grin at the sound of Merlin's furious "Just hand it to me, you prat!" from the other side.

"I told you," Merlin huffed, then coughed a little, boots slapping across the stone floor as he presumably gathered up the discarded shirt. "Waiting for us."

"Yes, you mentioned that, Merlin," Arthur rolled his eyes again, even though Merlin couldn't see him, and pulled on the fresh tunic. "But since you won't get it any other way, I suppose I'll spell it out for you – I didn't ask you what she was doing, I asked you where she was." He tugged on the breeches.

"Oh! No, I can't tell you that bit," Merlin replied, which was extremely far from reassuring. "But you'd best hurry up, if you don't want to keep her waiting." He coughed again, a bit quieter this time—from the sound of things, he tried, without much success, to muffle it behind his hand.

"Merlin," Arthur emerged from behind the dressing screen with a frown, "you can't just cancel an entire feast and make off with my queen and—"

"I didn't 'make off' with your queen!" Merlin broke in, the picture of indignation. "Gwaine did!"

"Do you—do you hear yourself?!"

"No, no, she's with the others, too!" Merlin added hastily, waving his hands wildly at Arthur, palms out, as though trying to calm an agitated horse. "Elyan and Leon and—" He snapped his mouth shut. "…you were not supposed to know all that yet."

"Merlin," Arthur raised his eyebrows, suspicion taking hold, "what are you up to?"

"Nothing!" Merlin dropped his hands back to his sides and flashed a bright smile, but the sheen of nervous sweat on his forehead belied him.

"Keeping secrets from your king is treason, Merlin," Arthur reminded him—and yes, he was using what Gwaine would call his "princess" voice, which it absolutely wasn't, thank you very much.

Merlin's grin faltered a little. "I—I am an open book, Sire."

"Good, so you can tell me exactly why you've got my knights and my queen waiting for me at an undisclosed location. And run and fetch my breakfast while you're at it," Arthur added, upon further thought. "Honestly, you can't expect me to put up with you on an empty stomach."

Merlin didn't move. "Actually, breakfast is—"

"Wait, let me guess," Arthur held up a hand to silence him. "Breakfast is waiting for us, too."

"You're catching on." In spite of everything, the corners of Merlin's lips began to twitch. "Never thought this day would come."

"Insulting your king is also treason."

"Existing is treason," Merlin muttered under his breath—ever exaggerating—and headed for the door, throwing an expectant glance at Arthur over his shoulder. "Come on, let's go. They'll get to wondering where we are if we don't show up soon."

"I give the orders, Merlin," Arthur reminded him, and stayed exactly where he was.

"Right, well, then, think of it this way," Merlin said. "The quicker you get there, the quicker you get breakfast."

"Threatening to starve your king? Also treason."

"Oh, trust me," Merlin cast a deliberate glance toward Arthur's middle, "my king is in no danger of starving."

"Merlin—!"

He didn't even get to finish his sentence before the idiot threw open the door and flung himself bodily through the gap. He tore down the corridor like hell itself nipped at his heels, so Arthur did the sensible, rational, mature, kingly thing—

—and chased after him.

Forget the stocks, Arthur decided, as his pulse picked up speed at the sudden exertion—a few hours of discomfort and rotten vegetables was far too kind a sentence—not even the dungeons were good enough at this point—he rounded the corner, and thundered down the next three flights of stairs without pause—sheer luck kept Merlin's gangly, long-limbed figure always just out of his reach, because no way had the idiot somehow gotten faster than him without his notice, no bloody way—round another bend, and Arthur realized, a second too late, just where Merlin was taking him—he stumbled, tried to stop—finally brought himself to a clumsy, skidding halt, there in the middle of the entrance hall—and he had to grab onto the banister behind him to keep upright—outside the open double doors at the other end of the hall, he caught half a glimpse of the horses, tacked up and ready—his own, spirited snow-white mare, tossing her head and snorting haughtily—next to her, Merlin's docile chestnut nag nickered softly and flicked her tail—the idiot had planned all this, hadn't he? And that same idiot had all but collapsed beside the horses, bursting into a furious fit of deep, hacking coughs—even from this distance, Arthur could see how the force of them shook his skinny frame, and he rolled his eyes heavenward.

"Honestly, Merlin," he called, and let go of the banister. He crossed the entrance hall, striding out into the sun. "That was barely a sprint, and if that's all it took to take you down, maybe I ought to have you run a few drills in training tomorrow with the knights—"

"No, no!" Merlin interrupted, and hastily straightened up, fixing on a sunny grin. "No, no, nope, no training needed here. Absolutely not." He shook his head emphatically, and glanced to the horses. "You know, Sire, since we're already out here, and," he gestured to the mounts, "the stable-hand has already gone to all this trouble of saddling up our horses for us, and it's such a beautiful day—"

"Shut up, Merlin," Arthur said flatly, and held up a hand for silence—he just—he just needed a moment to think—if Merlin could just give him a moment—gods, the idiot really had planned all this—and he'd actually done a halfway decent job keeping it quiet—until this morning, Arthur hadn't had the faintest inkling—and damn it if he wasn't curious now as to what lay ahead—besides, best way out was straight through, and all of that. Gods knew the imbecile wouldn't rest until he'd gotten what he wanted.

"Well," Arthur drew himself up and started down the steps, breezing past Merlin and hauling himself up onto his horse in hardly half a moment, "come on, then. Don't just stand there looking like a startled stoat."

Merlin beamed, and scrambled onto his horse, a bumbling gawky jumble of messy dark hair and limbs too long for his body—when he'd pulled himself up, he cast another glance at Arthur, glowing smile still fixed on his face.

Arthur rolled his eyes, and tried very hard to pretend he hadn't noticed, as he gave his mare a nudge in the flank with the heel of his boot, and she broke into a trot out of the courtyard—the clop of hooves on the cobblestone behind him said Merlin was following close behind. As he always was.

"Where to?" Arthur glanced over his shoulder, only for a moment, as they rode through the arch marking the boundary of the courtyard. "Don't tell me this is some wild goose chase you've set me on, Merlin," he added warningly when the man hesitated.

"No, no, it's not that," Merlin's lips twitched up into another grin—how he had the energy for so many of them, and before breakfast, even, Arthur would never know. "Just—through here." He tugged lightly at the reins, pulling a pace ahead of Arthur, and guided his mount toward the woods, the trees' bare autumn branches, stark against the silver dawn sky, swaying and bowing in the strong morning wind.

Oh. Arthur brightened a bit, and sat up a little straighter in the saddle—the woods, yes, now that was a worthy destination. The thought of the loamy green depths awaiting them brought a grin to his face—already, he could feel the sun on his skin, its bright warmth beaming down through dense, ashen clouds—could smell the soil, sodden from the week's heavy rains—could hear the cheerful trills of nearby birds—the sharp cracks of fallen twigs and branches snapping underfoot—if Merlin had just told him up front this was where they'd be going—the moment they entered the ostensible shelter of the naked trees, leafless limbs arching high up over their heads, Arthur couldn't help it anymore—he laughed, full and bright and real, for the first time in what felt suddenly like years, and threw his mare into a gallop, and didn't even care about the small, knowing smirk tugging at the corner of Merlin's lip.

Under these open skies, the formalities and the ceremonies, the titles, the customs, the tired, too-old conventions of the court seemed a distant dream, back within the castle's walls. Out here, in the golden glow of the newly-risen sun, the weight of the world's expectations left his shoulders, and he remembered how to breathe. Out here, no one looked to him for answers. Out here, no one needed him to be the king. Out here, he was just Arthur.

Fallen leaves crunched and crackled under the horses' hooves, the only sound as they wended their way through the trees—the mounts plodded leisurely along the path for nearly half an hour, and Arthur was just beginning to suspect that the idiot had gone and gotten them lost when—

"We're here!" Merlin hauled on his reins until his horse halted.

Arthur frowned and drew even with Merlin, gazing round the decidedly empty patch of forest he'd seen fit to stop in. "There's nothing here."

"Oh! Just beyond those trees," Merlin nodded at a thick clump of sturdy-looking beeches. "But we'd best leave the horses here." He swung himself out of the saddle, and staggered when he hit the ground—stumbled so bad he nearly fell, and had to press a hand to his nag's side to keep his feet.

Arthur snorted and quit his own saddle, with far more finesse. "Graceful as always, Merlin." Actually, not as always—not now that he stopped to think about it, even Merlin, clumsy as he was, had mastered the art of getting off a horse since he'd come to Camelot, and it was honestly rare to see him blunder about like that upon dismounting nowadays.

"Just one of my many gifts," Merlin grinned, and straightened back up to his full height. He set off through the trees a moment later—still a bit off-balance, if the slight, sudden lurch to the left was anything to go by.

Arthur followed after him—had to be near enough to tease if the idiot fell, after all—and swatted aside a few low-hanging branches, brushing and scratching at the unprotected skin of his face. He stepped nimbly over a tree root that sent Merlin sprawling—Arthur reached out and caught him, on instinct, by the upper arm before he could strike the ground, and righted him.

"What is wrong with you today?" Arthur demanded—the minute he took his hand away, the man swayed like a tearing tree in a fierce gale, and Arthur reflexively grabbed at him again, catching his shoulder this time, to steady him. "Even you've gotten the hang of putting one foot in front of the other by this time, haven't you?"

"Ah, s-sorry, Sire," Merlin smiled again, but something in it seemed a bit forced this time. "Dizzy."

"Dizzy?" Arthur couldn't keep back a snort. "Not going to swoon like a maiden on me, are you, Merlin? Perhaps you need to go to the fainting couch before you dirty your petticoat?"

Merlin's cheeks colored. "Maybe if you weren't such a prat—"

"Come on," Arthur cut him off, choking back another laugh at the indignant look on his face—gods, he hadn't gotten the chance to get the man this riled up in weeks, Merlin had seemed so distracted lately, "I'd like to get this over with today, you know."

"We would already be there by now if you hadn't insisted on putting up such a fuss," Merlin said, a touch testily.

"I didn't put up a fuss, you told me Gwaine had 'made off' with Guinevere because you can't explain things to save your life," Arthur reminded him, and checked that Merlin was steady on his feet before letting him go.

Arthur turned away from Merlin and plunged into the trees—if the crinkle of leaves beneath thin, worn boots was anything to go by, the idiot was right on his heels, but he didn't bother to glance back to be sure. Just up ahead, the trees thinned—several gaps appeared amongst the sturdy trunks and—oh, finally—at least now he could finally get to the bottom of all this—he put on a fresh spurt of speed, and stepped out at last beyond the final beech.

Before him stretched a glade, small but beautiful, ringed all round by more of the towering, bare-branched beeches, and the ground a carpet of colorful leaves—a bit farther on rushed a stream, clear cool water splashing persistently over the worn, wet stones, gleaming under the bright, full sun—and there, in the center of the glade, with a few wicker baskets set down beside them, on a thick scarlet quilt that must have come from the palace, and bright, beaming smiles wreathed on every warm, familiar face—

"HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!"

There was no unity to the sound, absolutely none at all—Percival's deep, rumbling tones, Guinevere's sweet, clear pitch, Leon's solemn timbre, Gwaine's playful inflection, Elyan's composed but cheerful call—it was all horribly discordant and glaringly inharmonious, and the moment they were through, they, all of them, every single one, fell about laughing as if they simply couldn't stop themselves—even the ever-serious Leon cracked a grin, and Gwen pressed her hands to her mouth to quiet her giggles—

Arthur stood, struck dumb, frozen in every limb, on the edge of the glade, staring round at the knights and lady gathered on the quilt—they'd all—had they all—had they all really—?

"I think the polite thing would be to join them."

Arthur startled—he hadn't heard Merlin come up behind him—then spun round to face his grinning servant. "You—you all—?" He swallowed, hard, around the sudden block in his throat. "For—for me—?" Oh, gods forbid, but Merlin must be rubbing off on him. He was turning into an absolute girl.

"Yeah." Merlin managed, somehow, to make the single word count more than a thousand courtly speeches. "For you." His smile turned a touch softer at the edges.

"You were all in on this?" Arthur turned to survey the others—Leon and Elyan passing around skins of water and pitchers of wine while Gwaine and Percival got into some quarrel or other over a picnic basket and Guinevere, his beautiful Guinevere, shook her head and smiled fondly at them—all of them, every last one of them, they were here, they were all here, and gods, they had cancelled a feast for him, gone mucking about in the forest before sunrise for him, just to try and make him happy—

"Ooh, very good, Sire. Nothing gets past you, does it?"

Arthur didn't look at him, didn't want to tear his eyes from the party gathered on the quilt, but he could hear the smile in Merlin's voice all the same.

"Shut up, Merlin," he murmured, half to himself.

"Come on, Princess!" Gwaine called, from his place half-wrapped around the picnic basket to stop Percival getting to it—Arthur really didn't want to know the story behind it, to be honest. "Let's cut the chit-chat and get to the part where we eat!"

"Eloquent as always, Gwaine."

"'Course," Gwaine shook out his hair, and shot Elyan a broad grin. "Part of the charm, and all."

"No, Gwaine's got a point," Merlin spoke up. "We all know what Arthur's like when he's not had his breakfast."

"Shut up, Merlin!"

Guinevere laughed—laughed! Arthur stung with the betrayal—and shifted to make room for her husband and Merlin. "Come on, you two. Cook absolutely outdid herself, it's wonderful."

When Arthur had taken the seat on the quilt beside her, she added, under her breath, "It was all Merlin's idea, really." She shot the man in question a glowing look as she spoke, brown eyes bright and warm. "He came up with everything."

"Merlin?" Arthur repeated doubtfully, and raised his eyebrows, following Guinevere's gaze to throw Merlin a glance of his own—the fool wasn't even looking at them, had already begun laughing with Gwaine at something or other—one of their inside jokes, Arthur suspected, with a slight pang of something like hurt—gods knew the two of them had a lot of those, especially in recent weeks—

Wait.

Inside jokes—recent weeks—inside jokes—recent weeks—oh, gods, Arthur was an idiot. The inside jokes weren't inside jokes. And the strange disappearances—those ones that only lasted mere minutes and left Merlin with a huge, stupid grin, and wasn't he always trying to deny—? And the swift, stolen glances Guinevere and the knights had been giving him all week when they thought he wasn't looking, when they thought he wouldn't see—the secret smiles—the stifled laughter, the conversations held in hushed whispers down deserted corridors, the ones that ceased the instant he appeared and he told himself that he didn't need to know every bit of idle gossip his servant and soldiers and queen saw fit to discuss without him and—

Merlin had not been excluding him at all.

Arthur turned, sharply, to face Merlin. "This—this is—" He swept his gaze over Gwaine and Percival then, too. "This is what you've been keeping from me, isn't it? All of you!" He twisted to look at Leon and Elyan as well. "This is what's got you all acting so strange!" He came back around to Guinevere.

"Oh, well done, Arthur," Merlin said, in the tone of one teaching a small child, and swiveled away from Gwaine to look him full in the face. "You are officially—mm—let's say—one-sixteenth less the oblivious clotpole I thought you were. Excellent job, Sire. Percival, I owe you a shilling."

Elyan snorted into his drink, and tried valiantly to pass it off as a cough.

Arthur flushed. "Don't go getting any ideas, Merlin, just because you're halfway decent at keeping one little secret—!"

Merlin laughed at this, a little harder than Arthur thought the comment strictly warranted. "Oh, you have no idea, Sire."

"Oh, go on, Merlin," Gwaine nudged the man in the ribs, "you haven't even shown him the best part yet." He unwrapped himself from the picnic basket, and pushed it toward Merlin with a grunt.

"Oh," Merlin's smile got, if possible, even bigger, and he hauled the basket up onto his knee at once, flipped back the lid, reached in with both hands and—

—and pulled out an entire cake. With icing.

Arthur closed his eyes. "Merlin." He opened them again. The cake was still there.

"Sire?"

"There—" Arthur blinked. No. The cake was definitely still there. Definitely. "There's a cake."

"Well spotted, Sire."

"Merlin!" He whipped round to glare at his servant. "You can't just—just go into the kitchens, and steal an entire cake!"

"No, no, no, I didn't!" Merlin threw up his hands in an obvious effort to placate Arthur. "See, Gwaine helped, so technically, we each stole half a cake, and—!"

Percival clamped a hand to his mouth to muffle his snickers. Gwaine looked like someone had bought the Rising Sun in his name.

"—and it's your favorite, too, so you should really go on and tuck in, and I can't give it back now, anyway, because then the cook will know it was us, and she'll kill me—she can't do anything to Gwaine, but I'm not a knight, there's nothing stopping her from having a go at me, and you've seen how she can get with that ladle of hers—"

"Merlin?" Arthur raised a hand.

Merlin sputtered to an uneasy stop, and muffled a cough into his palm.

"Are you going to prattle on all day, or are you going to let somebody cut the cake at some point?"

Merlin dropped his hand from his mouth to reveal a beam.

"Why—?" Arthur felt his face turning a little red as Merlin dumped the clumsily-wrapped, slightly lumpy parcel unceremoniously down into his lap. "Why did you lot get me gifts?"

"One gift," Gwaine corrected. "We don't like you that much, Princess. 'Sides, it was all Merlin."

"No, it was not all Merlin, it was everyone. You all helped," Merlin said, whipping round to frown at the knight—he swayed a second or two, shaking and unsteady on his feet-Arthur remembered, with a stab of something like concern, that he'd said he was dizzy earlier—he wondered if Merlin had actually eaten anything with the rest of them—now that he thought about it, he distinctly remembered the man waving away a proffered slice of cake, saying he wasn't hungry—

"Gwen and I helped," Elyan corrected fiercely, pulling Arthur from his thoughts. "The rest of you lot sat around and gossiped. Like old maids."

Leon and Percival had the grace to blush. Gwaine did not.

"What are you waiting for?" He demanded of Arthur, and gestured impatiently at the parcel. "Open it!"

Arthur hesitated a second longer, then slowly undid the wrappings—something thin and supple rolled lazily out of the paper and twine trappings, a rich earthy brown in color—there was a faint sort of gleam at one end of it—a dragon, wrought in gold, a perfect match to the Pendragon emblem—

"A sheath," Merlin said, slightly apprehensively. "For—for Excalibur." He coughed, and motioned to the ornate sword hanging at Arthur's hip. "We—we thought you might like—?"

"It's incredible," Arthur breathed, running his fingers lightly over the fine leather, too full of wonder to mind much else, "it's—I—wow."

Somewhere above him, Guinevere laughed.

"I—" Arthur tore his eyes from the beautiful sheath, and lifted his head to look at Merlin. "Thank you."

Merlin's answering grin threatened to split his face clean in two. "Elyan and Gwen really did most of it, they're much better with leather than I am, it wouldn't have gotten done without them."

Arthur sent the two of them a small, grateful smile, and a quick nod of thanks. "It's incredible," he repeated, more for Guinevere's benefit than Elyan's, and he was rewarded when she smiled back, her cheeks turning a lovely shade of rosy pink at the praise.

"Oi!" And a grape struck Arthur square on the forehead—burst, with a loud, thoroughly unpleasant sort of squelching noise, sticky juice streaking down his temple, trickling over his cheek and all the way to his chin.

He sputtered, in what Merlin would probably have called a most un-kingly fashion, and scrubbed furiously at the syrupy liquid with the back of his hand. He didn't need to look round to see who the culprit had been. "Gwaine!"

"Well," the man sounded entirely unrepentant, "are you going to actually use the sheath, or are you just gonna stare at it some more?"

Arthur wiped the last of the juice from his face. "I don't know, let's see how I feel after we've come back to Camelot, and you've served some time on night patrol." He snapped up an abandoned cherry off a nearby plate, lobbed it at Gwaine in retaliation, and allowed himself a grin when it hit its target—he never missed.

Gwaine let out a cry of dismay as the cherry hit his head and exploded in a gummy mess of sweet red liquid running down his dark hair in a steady cascade. He raked his fingers frantically through the shaggy, stylishly-unkempt strands in vain, amid gales of uproarious laughter from the other knights, and stifled snickers from Merlin and Guinevere.

He flicked his head up again to toss a glare at Arthur. "Princess, you asked for it!"

A second later, a whole wedge of cheese had gone soaring through the air straight for Arthur, and he ducked on instinct to avoid the projectile. It landed, with a solid thunk, on the plate he'd nicked the cherry off.

"Hey, hey, no, Gwaine! What are you thinking, honestly, somebody could get seriously hurt—?!"

Arthur grabbed up a bread roll to even the score, and Sir Leon's concerns went decidedly unheard.

"Come on, you lot can do better than that!" Arthur called over his shoulder, and nudged his mare lightly in the flank with the heel of his boot, urging her on to greater speeds—the wind rushing into his face with the speed of a crossbow bolt ripped the breath from his lungs, and a loud laugh from somewhere in his chest—behind him, he could make out the thump of hoofbeats, the others hot on his tail, Merlin's old, slow nag undoubtedly bringing up the rear.

"You got a head start, Princess!" squawked the ever-competitive Gwaine, over the roar of the wind in his ears.

Arthur laughed again, and tossed a glance back at the others. Gwaine's hair, a bit of cherry juice and icing off the cake still smeared in it, much to the knight's obvious chagrin, was the first thing he could make out, and he stifled another grin at the sight—a bit farther back, he saw the rest of their party, Percival's broad bare shoulders easily visible through the sun-dappled trees, closely followed Leon's ginger-blond curls with Guinevere's rough cotton lavender dress in place of the rich silken finery she wore at court nowadays and Elyan's stocky shape half a pace behind, and Merlin—

—Merlin—?

Arthur spun round and jerked roughly on the reins—his mare, ever-faithful, stopped dead at once, smack in the middle of the path—he twisted in the saddle, seeking the dark-haired head, the worn brown jacket, the ratty red scarf—

"Where—" he nearly fell clean off his mount, and hastily steadied himself. "Where's Merlin got off to?"

Gwaine pulled up short. "What? He's right there, he's just past—" he glanced over his shoulder. "—just past Percy—" The rest of his sentence died unspoken, whatever it might have been, when he spotted the glaring lack of cheeky, badly-dressed manservant. "Hey, has—" he cleared his throat and raised his voice by a fraction, winding the thick leather reins absently round his fingers, "—has anyone seen Merlin?"

"Not since that stream back there," Guinevere called back. "He slowed down just before we cleared it, I think the race tired out the poor horse."

Arthur snorted. "Or the idiot got himself lost," All the same, he swung himself from the saddle, fisted a hand around the reins, and headed back the way they'd come, his steed nickering behind him with every step. "Right, I'll go and fetch him."

"We all ought to head back, really," Guinevere said, and slid smoothly from her steed as well. "If we want to get back to the castle by nightfall."

A second later, and the knights slipped from their saddles too, a faint murmur of assent rippling through the armored party like a wave, as they set off through the cool woods, withered leaves crunching under heavy boots and shod hooves—Arthur heard the stream before he saw it, the merry babble and gurgle of water lapping over wet stones, and he quickened his pace, a brisk, straight-backed stride through the leafless, close-growing trees—if he went quick enough, and quiet enough, he could sneak up on the idiot, give him a good scare—Merlin had this funny little screech he always did every time someone startled him, and no, Guinevere, it was not mean to laugh at him and call him a girl about it, honestly, had she ever heard the noise before, it sounded like—

Arthur cleared the final line of the trees at last, and Merlin came into his view. Except—except something wasn't right—

On hands and knees in the mud beside his chestnut mount, skinny shoulders shaking something awful under his too-big brown jacket, hands white against the dark, rich earth, a glistening line of sticky sweat streaming down his temple, pale cheeks gone red as cherries, with sick pouring from his half-open mouth in a vile, yellow-white surge—

"Merlin!"

Icy fear ripped through Arthur, sharper than an enemy's blade, and he bolted across to the bank, went to his knees beside Merlin, vaguely aware of the others thundering after him—he put a hesitant hand on one of the servant's trembling shoulders, rubbing small circles in the bony back. It seemed to take an age for the bout to pass, for the flow of sick to cease—Merlin remained, bent double, for several moments, his face inches from the leaf-strewn ground, his breath a harsh, rattling gasp in his throat.

"Gods, Merlin," Arthur whispered, "what is wrong with you?" The instant the words left his mouth, he winced—that was a terrible way to put it, that was a really terrible way to put it.

"N-nothing," Merlin shot back up, hastily uncurling from the tight ball he'd crushed his shaking body into. "Nothing, I'm f-fine." He scrubbed at a line of sick clinging to the corner of his mouth, and smiled at Arthur, actually smiled at him, with bile on his lips and dark shadows, like bruises, beneath slightly glassy eyes. "S-sorry, guess I just—uh—ate something bad, thought the strawberries tasted a bit funny—"

"You look like hell." Gwaine sounded about as incredulous as Arthur felt. "Look at yourself, mate, you look sick."

"What?" Merlin managed a laugh, even, but something, or maybe everything, in it sounded painfully forced. "Don't be ridiculous, Gwaine, I'm fine—"

Guinevere's smooth brown hand found Merlin's forehead, pushing aside the dark fringe to place her palm flat to the skin beneath. "Merlin!" Her eyes widened. "You've a fever, you're burning up!"

No, no, that didn't make any sense, that didn't make any sense at all, how could he have gotten that sick so quickly—? Unless—a block of ice seemed to form and freeze in Arthur's stomach, frigid and heavy—unless he'd been like this all day—

"N-no," Merlin sat up on his knees, and knocked her hand aside with one of his own. "No, I'm not, Gwen, you're feeling things, I'm fine—" He pushed himself to his feet and swayed alarmingly in place.

Arthur stood up, too, and seized Merlin's arm to stop him falling, and oh, gods, he'd said he was dizzy, hadn't he, he'd said he was dizzy, and he hadn't stopped coughing all day, and he hadn't eaten a damned thing, not even a bit of that cake he'd nicked from the kitchens, and gods knew you couldn't keep Merlin from cake, and why hadn't Arthur seen—? "Merlin, you idiot, why didn't you tell me you weren't well?!" Why didn't I realize, why didn't I see, he shouldn't have had to tell me because I should have paid attention, I should have realized, I should have seen—

Merlin snatched his arm from Arthur's grip with a glower. "I am well, Arthur! I'm fine!"

"Don't be stupid, Merlin!" Arthur snarled. "You look like you're about to collapse!"

"I'm—!" The words left his lips a weak sort of rasp—his voice had gone hoarse and scratchy, and sounded painful—he winced, and rubbed at his throat, fingers pale and trembling against the rough red cloth of his favorite scarf— "I'm—I'm fine—" he shuddered, and his stumbling, shaking legs crumpled under him, and he fell.

Arthur threw his arms out, on instinct, and caught his servant before he hit the ground, reflexively pulling the bony, shivering body closer to his own—Merlin's dark-haired head dropped down onto Arthur's chest, and he sank back to his knees to lessen the unexpected weight—the proximity should have embarrassed him, would have, if Merlin hadn't been shuddering so violently against him, he could swear the man was about to burst apart where he sat—Arthur couldn't stand it—he stripped the jacket from his own shoulders, and wrapped it round Merlin's gangly frame, over the worn brown layer he already had.

"I—I'm s-sorry, Arthur," Merlin said at last, in a small and shaky sort of voice Arthur had never heard from him before, and never wanted to hear again. "I was tr-trying to give you a good anniversary, a really good anniversary—" he pushed back, pushed away from Arthur, and weaved a little where he sat. By some miracle, he stayed upright. "—I know how h-hard today must be for you, and I thought I could t-take your mind off—" he swiped miserably at his nose. "—off all of it—" he slumped a little farther in on himself, and shuddered horribly, head turned down, face hidden. "—but I g-guess I kind of—" he didn't say it so much as he slurred it, every word running together, too garbled and jumbled to be called speech, "—guess I kind of r-ruined it, huh?"

Merlin barely got the last word off his lips before his skinny, shuddering body went limp, and he collapsed into Arthur's chest.

Arthur kind of lost it. A little. Maybe.

"You really are a complete idiot, aren't you, Merlin?!"

Right, so, maybe Arthur kind of lost it a lot, and maybe there was no kind of about it, and maybe Gwaine lost it, too, if the sudden string of obscenities aimed in his direction was anything to go on, but Arthur couldn't help it—Merlin had just—all limp and pale and sweaty and shaking—oh, gods, he looked awful—what on earth had he even been thinking—?

Arthur knew—of course he knew, there was no way for him to not know at this point—Arthur knew when it came to the two of them, Merlin had developed a bad—no, alarming was the right word, more than anything—all right, then, so Merlin had developed an alarming habit of putting himself second, and Arthur knew that, knew the man in front of him would drag himself through hell if he thought it'd make Arthur happy—he thought, again, for the thousandth time since it had happened, about the sight of the thin, still body, going stiff on the cold stone floor as the Dorocha's ice took hold—but this—sweating and sniffling and shaking fit to fly apart, his long limbs trembling under the strain, too weak and dizzy to even get off his knees, with a puddle of his own sick soaking slowly into the mud, and the sorrys spilling off him like rain—the idiot had pushed himself to complete collapse, and all he'd cared about was what this would mean for Arthur—ruined it, Merlin had said, I ruined it, like he actually believed that—like he actually believed he'd done something wrong, just by getting sick, like he actually—like he actually believed he'd let Arthur down—

If anyone, Arthur thought, and his grip tightened on Merlin's too-warm body, still slouched, boneless, against his chest, if anyone's let anyone down today, it's me, it's not Merlin, it's me—

"We—" he forced himself to raise his head. To look at the others. His voice, when he tried to speak, sounded very far away in his own ears. "We need to get him back to Camelot."

Merlin didn't wake.

In the time it took them to make it back to the city, his eyes stayed stubbornly closed, his body slack as a doll—Arthur had been almost grateful for it, at first—at least the awful shivers had stopped—now, as he stumbled up the steep stone steps to Gaius' chambers and half a pace behind Gwaine, and cradling the still, motionless form of his servant in his arms, he thought he'd rather have the trembling again, horrible as it was, over this unmoving, almost deathly calm.

Arthur lowered Merlin onto the first cot he saw, huffing a little as he released the weight—he'd scarcely gotten the man settled when Guinevere spoke up—

"Water," she said, clearly, "cold water, lots of it—"

Gwaine dashed off for the pump before she could say another word.

"Help me get his clothes off," she added, to Arthur, one hand already taking hold of the rough brown fabric of Merlin's jacket, "he's burning up with fever, we need to cool him down."

Arthur didn't even think to protest—it took a bit of maneuvering to work Merlin's skinny arms out of the overlarge sleeves, to unwind the red scarf from his neck, ease the sweat-drenched blue tunic over his head—

"—his boots," Guinevere nodded to Merlin's feet, "get his boots, his socks—"

Arthur dashed to the foot of the bed, fumbled with the tarnished silver buckles, gleaming against the brown cloth, but the cold metal didn't want to give—come on, come on, come on—gods, you'd think the man had done them up with magic—Arthur's searching fingers finally found the clasp, and he flicked it open, wrenched off the wretched boots—note to self, buy Merlin boots that are easier to undo—well, first, never let Merlin think he needs to push himself until he collapses ever again, then let's do something about the boots—as Arthur tugged off Merlin's socks, Gwaine came barreling back in the door, clutching two enormous, overflowing buckets by their large handles—

"Wonderful, Gwaine, thank you," Guinevere spared him a nod and a slightly harried smile. She plunged her own kerchief in one of the buckets, pausing only to wring it out before sponging down Merlin's brow and temple. "Arthur, grab a rag and get his chest," she didn't look away from Merlin's flushed face, "his stomach, his arms, his back, too, if you can, I don't think this will be enough."

Arthur discarded the boots on the floor and bolted to the opposite end of the room to seize one of Gaius' rags, moving so fast the cluttered chambers blurred around him—he made it back to Merlin's bedside in scarcely an instant, and soaked the rag in the bucket, as Guinevere had done—he didn't stop to draw out the excess, just put it to Merlin's chest, let the water run in rivulets out over the bare skin—

Merlin twitched, and flinched at the icy rain pouring over his naked torso, a soft moan escaping through his pale lips—"Don't be such a girl, Merlin," Arthur murmured, on instinct—Guinevere glanced up, her dark eyes sweeping the scene—

"Oh, thank goodness," a shred of the tension in her pretty features seeped out, "oh, thank goodness, he's reacting to the cold, that's—that's a good sign, that's a very good sign, keep it up, Arthur."

The faintest stirrings of relief pricked at Arthur, and he nodded, dabbing lightly at the exposed stomach and ribs as he worked his way down.

"Leon, Elyan," Guinevere called, gingerly wiping down Merlin's blazing red cheeks with her kerchief, "go into Gaius' cabinets, tell me if he has any astragalus root—big, erm, brown things, lots of limbs," she added, at the knights' perplexed looks. "Get some sage, too, and keep an eye out for echinacea, big pink flowers, petals have a sort of droop to them—"

Leon and Elyan shot over to the cupboards, ripping open the creaking doors and rummaging through with feverish intensity. In seconds, Elyan had pulled out a heavy, pale brown clump covered in what appeared to be copious amounts of coarse black hair, and Guinevere shot him a tired smile.

"Fantastic, Elyan, that's exactly what I'm looking for! Gwaine," she continued, "get a fire going, and put that other bucket over it, get the water hot—"

Gwaine snatched up the bucket and sloshed over to the dark hearth with no further prompting.

"—if we can get Merlin's fever down far enough to wake him, we can get him some astragalus tea," Guinevere explained, when Elyan raised his eyebrows. "It'll work wonders, Gaius uses it all the time."

Arthur hastily returned to his own work, redoubling his efforts on cooling Merlin down—he didn't know how long he stood there, swiping at the man's burning, fevered skin—it felt like hours—certainly long enough for Gwaine to get a good fire going in the grate, long enough for Elyan and Leon to start clearing up, for lack of anything else to do, Arthur supposed—but the flush receded at last from Merlin's thin face, and Guinevere gently cleared away the last line of sweat, still clinging doggedly to his temple, a smile curving her lovely lips, before she pressed her palm to his brow.

"His fever's come down," she revealed. "I think we've done all we can for the moment."

Arthur smiled—the first time since Merlin collapsed in his arms, and it was still scarcely more than a quirk at the corner of his mouth. At the memory of it—the weight of Merlin against his chest, the horrible rasping sound of his breath as it left his lungs, the rapid, uneven flutter of his lashes as his eyes fell closed, the scorching heat of his skin as the temperature took hold, his slurred and shaking voice as he whispered his fervent apologies—Arthur couldn't keep back a wince, and the smile slipped from his face like it had never been. He scrubbed a tired hand down his slightly sunburned face at the thought of it. "How long has he been like this? Do you know?"

Guinevere frowned, her small mouth twisting up as she thought. On any other day, Arthur wouldn't have been able to keep from leaning in and kissing her at the sight—he loved her "concentration" face—but Merlin's slow, labored breathing on the bed between them wouldn't let him forget the matter at hand.

"Well," she said at last, and slowly, "I don't know, but if I had to guess, I'd say he made himself far worse than he would be, if he hadn't been working quite so hard lately."

Working hard? Horrible, burning guilt seized Arthur, blazing in his veins, bubbling up like acid in his stomach, tongues of unchecked flame scorching through his chest, searing up his throat like bile. "I—I worked him too hard?" He looked to Guinevere, in the desperate hope that she might say otherwise. "Did I—did I make him—did I work him until he was—?" Bad enough that he hadn't noticed the state of his own servant until the idiot had passed out in front of him, but worse still to think he'd put Merlin in that state to start with.

"Oh, no! No, Arthur, no," Guinevere's eyes went round—she reached across the bed, and placed her warm hand over his. "That is absolutely not what I meant at all, I promise. I don't think," she worried her lip, "well, I don't think Merlin's exactly been doing the best job looking after himself since Gaius went away. He took on Gaius' work in addition to his own for you—"

Arthur nodded. He knew that.

"—and then he threw himself into all these preparations for your anniversary, and of course he couldn't tell you about that bit—" she tightened her grasp on Arthur's hand as she spoke.

In spite of her intentions, Arthur only felt the weight on his chest grow heavier with every word—he should have seen—how had he not—? How had he not seen—? Merlin had been running himself into the ground like this ever since Gaius had gone away—and Arthur had noticed it, hadn't he—had thought—oh, gods, he'd thought how impressive it was, that Merlin managed to keep up with Gaius' job as well as his own—impressive, yes, not concerning, not worrying, not far too large and heavy a workload for one man to carry—how had he not seen—?

"—but—but this wasn't your fault," Guinevere broke in, as though she could read his mind, and shook her dark-haired head, brown curls bouncing with the movement. "Not in the slightest. Merlin's been pushing himself far too hard for far too long now. I just—" she glanced at the motionless form of Merlin between them, and there was the slightest tremble at the corner of her mouth. "I just wish I'd realized it had gotten this bad."

"No, it wasn't your fault, Guinevere," Arthur said at once—he knew the shame in her voice too well, knew her too well, and the gravity of his own blame fell back a bit in the face of the burden she had no need, no right, to bear. He squeezed her hand, and pulled his mouth up in a smile when she met his eyes. "You had no way of knowing. Merlin wasn't exactly announcing it in the city square, was he?"

Guinevere's eyes still betrayed her guilt, but her lips twitched marginally. "Perhaps he hung a banner."

Arthur huffed out a short, quiet laugh. "Perhaps."

"Erm—?" Elyan wheeled around, away from the hairy brown root still lying on the table, to look at his sister, his dark eyes wide. "Do you know how Gaius makes the tea? Leon and I have just been—we've sort of—erm—" he gestured, helplessly, to the root.

Guinevere laughed then, too, one hand jumping to her mouth to cover the sound. "Oh—oh, yes, I'm sorry," she gave Arthur's hand one last squeeze before leaving the bedside to join Elyan at the table. "Here, I'll show you…"

Merlin barely opened his eyes when Guinevere roused him to give him the tea—the fever had waned significantly, but Arthur still didn't think he was entirely lucid—he all but poured the tea down Merlin's throat himself, to the last drop, refused to let up until the cup had run completely dry.

Leaving was the absolute last thing he wanted to do just then—he owed this much to Merlin, at least, owed it to the man to stay with him until he'd finally woken—but there were, Guinevere and Leon reminded him, court matters to be taken care of, and nobles to be appeased, and Gwaine outright refused to leave Merlin's side for anything—he was in trustworthy, if not altogether capable, hands and Arthur must content himself with that—hours passed before he could return—the matins rang out before he made his way back to the physician's chambers, and he was briefly, intensely grateful to Guinevere, that she didn't try to stop him, didn't try to lead him to bed instead—perhaps she realized he wouldn't, couldn't, sleep until he'd made this right.

Gwaine put up a bit of a fight at first, but the shadows under his bloodshot eyes spoke for him, and he eventually took himself up to Merlin's room with, if not good grace, at least a less-than-courteous resignation.

Arthur sat in the chair his knight vacated, staring down into Merlin's still, sleeping face. Now that there was nothing left to do—no fever to fight or tea to brew, no speeches to give or crown to wear, no meetings to hold—now that he was on his own, he couldn't hide from the truth anymore—it stared back at him, silent and accusing and so terribly stark in the flickering light of the hearth fire, casting fleeting shadows over Merlin's sharp features.

Didn't the idiot know, didn't he realize, didn't he see that nothing, certainly not some stupid day on the calendar, a day that would be there next year, and the year after that, and the year after that, didn't Merlin see that nothing in the world would ever matter so much to Arthur that he would want his servant to drive himself to his limits? Didn't Merlin see, didn't Merlin realize—didn't he—didn't he realize—?

Maybe—and the guilt flooded back in like the ocean in a storm, rising in his chest like the tide, frothing furiously in his lungs—maybe he didn't. Maybe Merlin didn't realize, maybe he didn't know, because when had Arthur ever given him cause to think otherwise—when had Arthur ever—had he ever—had he ever—?

"A-Arthur?"

"Merlin!" Arthur startled, jerked, leapt from his seat—he lifted a hand, on instinct, to Merlin's bony back to steady him while he struggled to rise from the thin mattress. "How—?" He hesitated. "How are you feeling?"

Merlin's head bobbed up at once to look at him. A tiny frown twisted his mouth as he finally pushed himself upright. "I've had better," he said, hoarsely, after a second, and a small, tired smile found its way onto his face. "What happened?"

Arthur almost laughed. It would be easier, he reflected, to tell him what hadn't. "Guinevere brought your fever down. Some sort of tea, she says Gaius uses it often, she—" he broke off abruptly as he remembered, "—she said to give you some, if you woke, hang on—" he hurried to the table, where Gwaine had apparently left the kettle, and hastily poured a steaming cup—thin coils of vapor rose off the smooth amber surface as he offered it to Merlin. "Here."

Merlin eyed it warily. "It's astragalus root, isn't it." It wasn't a question.

"I take it you don't enjoy it."

"Not in the slightest."

"Well, I'm hardly going to face Guinevere's wrath just to spare your delicate sensibilities," Arthur motioned to the cup. "Drink."

Merlin scowled, but obligingly sipped.

Near-total silence reigned for the next several minutes, nothing but the crackle of the fire, and the reluctant Merlin unhappily drinking his tea—Arthur shifted slightly in his seat—tried not to look at him—

"I'm sorry," Merlin said at last—only, he didn't say the words so much as he whispered them into his tea—it was as if he half-hoped Arthur wouldn't hear them at all.

I'm sorry, Arthur—I was trying to give you a good anniversary, a really good anniversary—I guess I kind of ruined it—Arthur's stomach jolted unpleasantly. He didn't have to ask what Merlin meant—he already knew.

But it appeared Merlin didn't need him to ask. "Today—" His free hand fisted around the blankets slung over his legs. He ran his thumb over the fraying edge. "Today isn't really a day you want to remember all that much, is it? And—and I understand—I mean, I don't, no, I don't understand, that's—that's the wrong—I only meant—"

The point, Merlin, Arthur thought—had it been any other day, he would have said it, too—but this time—this time—he shut his mouth.

"—well, today just—" Merlin swallowed. "—just isn't a good day for you."

Arthur didn't bother to answer. Merlin would know it was the truth even if he denied it until his dying breath.

"But it's—it's not—it's not right," Merlin continued, haltingly—it occurred to Arthur, for the first time, that maybe this wasn't any easier on Merlin than it was on him. "It's not right because it's your anniversary, and you deserve to have at least one good memory of your anniversary—everyone does, but especially you—forget I said that," he added, sharply, when Arthur looked at him, "that bit will just go to your head—look, I—I just meant, everyone deserves to have a good memory of their anniversary, and I thought if you had a good one," he uncurled his fingers from around the blankets, and picked at the loose threads, "I th-thought if you had a good one, it might help with the badones."

Arthur swallowed hard—damn Merlin, he thought, blinking furiously, damn the stupid idiot, being so stupid and nice and loyal and trying so hard—trying so hard for me—

"But I—" Merlin pulled him from his thoughts, still gazing into his tea, "—I guess I ruined—" His cheeks colored. It was almost as if he caught himself in the act of saying something he shouldn't. "—I guess it didn't work."

—the shake in his shoulders and the flush in his cheeks and the shadows under his eyes and guess I kind of ruined it huh—

"Merlin," he said, and it was like he couldn't stop himself, "Merlin, look at me, you didn't ruin anything."

Merlin froze. His head snapped up.

"You did give me a good memory of my anniversary today—a really good one, if I'm being honest, the best one I've ever—don't look so pleased with yourself, you're still an idiot," he tacked on hastily, when Merlin began to grin. "Did you stop, even once, to think, hmm, maybe I should tell someone I'm so ill I'm going to swoon like a maiden—"

Merlin went pink to the tips of his overlarge ears. "I did not—!"

"—no, I bet you didn't, because you're an idiot," Arthur concluded, and sat down, heavily, in the chair by the bed again.

"I wasn't that ill. I wasn't!" Merlin added when Arthur raised his eyebrows incredulously. "Besides, it was your anniversary! What was I supposed to? Skip it? I don't think so! I'd been planning it for weeks!" He appeared so indignant at the very thought, Arthur almost laughed, and let him off the hook.

"Funny thing about anniversaries, Merlin," he schooled his features into the sternest scowl he could manage, "they're an annual thing. Suppose I should have known you haven't figured that out yet, I mean, I shouldn't expect that much from you—"

Merlin huffed, and opened his mouth to retort, so Arthur hastened on.

"—but my point is, the anniversary would have been there next year, Merlin. And the year after that. You shouldn't have ignored what you needed for what you thought I did."

Merlin bit his lip. "I just—" he shifted uncomfortably on the cot. "—I wanted to make sure you were all right—"

"Thank you for that," Arthur said sincerely. "Really. Thank you, Merlin. But you should have made sure you were all right first. My anniversary may not be my favorite day, but it is just a day, and you matter far more to me than any—" Oh, no, oh, gods, the stupid idiot was grinning like a loon, abort abort abort—

"You'reanidiotandyoushouldn'thavegonemuckingabouttheforestwhenyouweresickallrightnowgobacktosleepMerlinthankyou!"

Merlin sniggered, and took a sip of tea to hide it.

Arthur didn't stop to think—he grabbed the bottom of the teacup in Merlin's hands, and tipped it up until the liquid splashed over the man's face, and he sputtered, dripping the warm liquid all over the cot.

"Arthur!"

Arthur swallowed back the laugh bubbling in his throat, and reluctantly handed Merlin the nearest dry rag—Guinevere would have his head served for dinner tomorrow night if he didn't—Merlin scrubbed the residue off his face with a grimace, and swayed slightly, a tearing tree in a fierce gale—

"Merlin?" Arthur bit down, hard, on his bottom lip to hide the grin.

"Mm?" Merlin flung the tea-drenched rag into the nearest basket, and settled slowly back on the cot.

Arthur wondered, for a minute, if he might be going too far. Nope. "So I guess you did need the fainting couch after all."

"Oh, you ass—!"

[avaduvernayfans]

Ava DuVernay and Rowan Blanchard on Female Storytelling in Film

“These images are not usually rendered by women.” Elaine Welteroth DECEMBER 20, 2017 8:00 AM

It was a match made on social media. Ava DuVernay, the director of the Oscar-nominated civil-rights epic Selma, and Rowan Blanchard, the teen star of Girl Meets World and an outspoken activist, followed each other on Twitter, and now their mutual admiration has led to a major collaboration. When Ava was putting together her latest feature — Disney’s $100 million adaptation of the classic children’s book A Wrinkle in Time, starring 14-year-old Storm Reid as space traveler Meg Murry — she cast Rowan in a crucial supporting role. Teen Vogue brought the pair together to talk about making tough choices, creating your own path, and letting go of fear.

Rowan Blanchard: Hi, Ava!

Ava DuVernay: Hey, Rowan!

RB: The first thing I wanted to ask is, what led you to become a director?

AD: I was a movie publicist, and on set we see different parts of the process. But a director has a certain domain over what is being made. So I was attracted to that kind of decision-making and world-building. After 10 or 12 years of watching other people— mostly men—do it, I decided to give it a try. The seed got planted when I was on the set of Collateral. That movie took place in East L.A., and there were all these black and brown people in East L.A., and I thought, ‘This is basically where I live. Why can’t I tell stories of black and brown people from this place?’

RB: I always thought of films through a directorial lens. A friend asked me two or three years ago if I would ever direct. For some reason, I answered, 'No, I don’t think I could do it. It feels like it would be too hard.’ I think it was partially because you just unconsciously feel that because of your gender—or what- ever else has held you back at other times—you can’t go as far as other people. Discovering your work, and the work of other female directors, pushed me to want to direct.

AD: It’s exciting for me to hear. I’m thrilled that there’s a new generation of women who feel super empowered and ready to at least explore. You know, Rowan, a lot of actresses your age are just learning and may not have the ability to go deep. But there is a depth to your work. I think it’s from always learning and having your eyes open. It might come from your having started at a young age. I think it’s from being a true citizen of the world.

RB: How did directing become your passion? Is there a specific artist who inspired you?

AD: It wasn’t a particular artist. I am just a huge movie geek. I never really thought that I could make films for a living. By the time I figured out that I could, I was in my 30s.

RB: I don’t think I would have ever thought that I could be a director if I hadn’t watched what you were doing. One of the days I was shadowing you, you set me up with your script supervisor. She was telling me about how you guys have worked together since, I think, your first full-length film. You bring people up with you. How do you maintain that on such a large scale?

AD: The most fun way to make something is to make it with people you like to be around. I didn’t go to film school. I don’t know how it’s supposed to be done. All I know is I prefer to be around people I like all day. So I just make sure that my sets are like that. I had no money, and I needed to make something, so I reached out to the people I knew, and they all happened to be women—and people of color.

RB: I read A Wrinkle in Time in third grade, and it stuck with me for so long. What drove you to pick that story to tell?

AD: I work really hard for things. And then I say to myself, If this is for me, it’ll be mine. This thing fell in my lap—an odd, little beautiful thing that I had never thought about. Then when I read the book, I felt instantly that it was mine. I thought, 'Wow! If this is for me to do, they’ll offer it to me.’ And they did. I said, 'I’ll do this, but I need to be able to do it my way.’ So it was great that the studio supported my vision of it, which was to include girls of color and women of all ages and body sizes. And Meg is a completely different Meg [from the book], a biracial girl. I’m excited to bring that to the screen. It’s very unique—the way in which our biracial brothers and sisters are asked to navigate their place in society.

RB: Ava, what advice would you have given yourself when you were my age?

AD: If you’re truly open, truly learning, truly kind, and proceeding in a loving manner toward others, the path starts to appear. And the more you let go of fear and embrace discovery and exploration, the more beautiful things you’ll find.

RB: How do you deal with fear now?

AD: I let it fuel me. I examine it; I sit in it. Where is this coming from? Why do I feel this way? And then I just take it in like food. Because fear includes risk, bravery, and courage—all these things that are good are connected to fear. Shoot! I’m afraid to put out A Wrinkle in Time. But if it works, fantastic. If it doesn’t work, I got through it.

RB: It’s funny that you say you don’t know if people are ready for A Wrinkle in Time. I know I’m ready, and I think the world is ready. Why do you feel like people aren’t ready?

AD: Because these images are not usually rendered by women, and they’re not usually rendered by women of color. There is no black woman director who’s done a sci-fi fantasy epic, where people are hopping planets, flying on things, and a black girl saves the universe. It’s not been done. So I can’t say with total confidence, 'Oh, that’ll work.’ I have to step into the fear of it and say, 'You know what? It’s worth a try. And I’m worthy to be the one in charge of it.’

RB: How does it feel to put something out into the world?

AD: Oh, my gosh! Well, you know the feeling—when you offer a piece of yourself and you hope that people see the value in it. I remember reading a review by the great critic Roger Ebert where he said, “The words ‘I love you’ are really a question.” The question is, “Do you love me back?” That’s what putting out a film is like: I give you this. Do you love me back?

RB: I’ve been making this group art project, Still Here, that I’m collecting and editing with Penguin Random House, and making that has been a very long, intimate process. It just feels so strange to turn the intimate outward. But I do believe that people are ready for A Wrinkle in Time, and I hope that people are ready for my book project. Wow! This has been a great therapy session. [Laughs]

[sodomyordeath]

When was the last time you wore a full face of makeup? now. Do you own an iPad? Fuck Apple Who was the last non-relative woman you spoke to in person? Coco

What’s the most hours you’ve worked in a week? all week with 6 hours a sleep ever 2 days

Do you believe in karma? no

What temperature is your thermostat currently set to? winter’s over it’s off. What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? I still have the same opinions I always had only my disposition changed.

Are you a kind, thoughtful person? I’m kind to those who are kind to me.

What’s an achievement you hope to see humanity accomplish in your lifetime? I’m not that much of an optimist. If they manage to not wipe themselfes out that’s good enough.

Do you know anyone who has a PhD? Someone who has just one?

Who were you dating in July 2010? Or were you single? I don’t keep records.

How do you feel when you’re the center of attention? Depends, if I get paid for it or not.

Would you rather be a nurse or a mechanical engineer? Both are equally ill-suited for me. I don’t like people enough for the former and I’m bored by simple machines.

Do you like Starbucks chai lattes, or do you think they’re too sweet? I like real Tea.

Are you and your SO facebook official? Fuck Facebook

Do you know how to set a formal table setting for a 3+ course dinner?

Do 9 or none.

Are you in a good mood today?

Fuck No.

Do you know anyone who works as a lawyer?

Some.

Which would bother you more: being told you’re not likable or being told you’re not sensible?

Told by whom?

Do you have a difficult time relating to other’s emotions?

I have exactly no time for that. If I bother to pay attention it’s easy enough. 

How many bedrooms does your house have?

I have no house.

What was the last electronic item you bought?

A phone.

Have you ever experienced sleep paralysis?

I can remember only one time.

Are there any trees in your yard? I have no yard.

What are your most-used apps on your phone? ssh, chrome, tumblr, hangouts, mail

Have you ever bathed in a river or a lake? I took a swim in plenty a natural waters.

When you were 15, what did you want to grow up to be? I decided to go into Computer Science

Did you ever achieve that? yep

Have you ever had a dream in which you died? yes

Have you bought a bag of potato chips in the past week? nope.

Does the thought of having wrinkles when you’re older upset you? I’m in my 40s how much older do I have to get?

How often do you buy a new phone? When I need one

Would you rather live in an apartment in the city, or a cabin in the woods? apartment in the city.

Do you use Snapchat? for what? Have you ever driven or ridden on a motorcycle? yea

If so, what’s the farthest you’ve traveled on one? the fuck should I know?

When was the last time you drank coffee?

21 years ago

Are you in any physical pain right now?

let’s call it discomfort.

Have you ever used a dating app, like Tinder, Bumble, etc? For what?

Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? Who isn’t. Our entire society is structered around us consuming large quantities of shit we don’t need. How more addicted can one be?

Are any other members of your household home right now? the number is one and one is the number.

What was your first job? And how long did you work there? A sweet consulting job took 3 month.

What was your favorite school subject when you were in middle school? Different school system here that doesn’t translate well. I’m an autodidact and very fast reader. When they were “teaching” us basic algebra and “geometry” I was already writing ray tracing renderers for fun in 68k assembler for some time. You can imagine that my questions have been less than welcome.  

“Oh we don’t teach that in this class”

“At what class do we get it?”

“University”

“What the fuck am I doing here?”

History got increasingly more boring as we looked into WW II and that more or less boiled down to “NAZIs Evil”. Once again my questions were less then welcome and I got an other pointer to”University”

I spent a hell of a lot of time in the library alas getting more and more frustrated with the little it had to offer ‘till the librarien had pitty on me and somehow managed that I got access to the university library. 

I discovered Spinoza, Leibnitz and Minsky and branched out from there :-)

the next couple a years I spent “learning” what we were supposed to know for the first couple a weeks of the school year and after I showed that I had enough “understening” of the subject matter I was left alone with my books. That said Theatre class and PE were fine.

My personal taste in music proved incompatible with the music teacher’s preferences (and he managed to spoil Mozart for me for some time) so that didn’t work out. 

The School Paper was fun to do and we won prizes for the time I was a part of it. I also learned that freedom of press doesn’t apply to school papers so I focused on the technical side, layout and typography ( Bézier curves can lead you to strange obsessions). 

Thankfully they did let me skip over 2 classes. It didn’t help much I still had no common ground with the other students and felt like I was surraunded by small apes, cute but not fit for conversations. Still the least fun time in my life.

My friends were usually 5 to 15 years older than me. Some I literally found by running into ‘em at the university library. Thankfully I always looked a good bit older than I was.

[randomaccesslegacy-blog]

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Nourish your skin with honey and cooked oatmeal. Cook dinner 2 tablespoons of oatmeal, then stir in one tablespoon of honey. Permit https://www.facebook.com/steptoremedies/posts/2099734926786443 to space temperature, then implement it to the face. We may well use conversion monitoring pixels from promoting networks for example Google AdWords, Bing Advertisements, and Facebook to be able to recognize when an ad has correctly resulted in the specified motion, for example signing up to the HubPages Services or publishing an short article about the HubPages Provider. Egg Yolk Face Masks—Egg yolks, However, are known for their capacity to moisturize and hydrate skin, leaving it using a balanced glow. These masks are great for individuals with dry skin. Selfmade face masks are full of mother nature's restorative goodness, in the shape of your nutrients, minerals, acids, and oils explained while in the tables above, with none of your substances that retailer-bought masks really have to contain for an prolonged shelf lifetime. Aloe Vera Gel with at the least ninety% pure aloe barbadensis leaf juice in it's great for sunburned or irritated skin. Aloe vera is known for its healing Houses and may do miracles for your skin. We use cookies making sure that we provide you with the most effective working experience on our website. This contains cookies from 3rd party social media Web sites and ad networks. These types of 3rd party cookies may keep track of your use on Boldsky internet sites for better rendering. what an incredible suggestion, thanks Susan! And thanks Kelly on your recipe, can’t hold out to test it! Just bought into oil cleansing so just about anything oil on my face super admirer of. Eventually, whisk the combination together with a fork and apply it to the face using your fingers or even a cotton ball. To learn how to produce a nourishing egg facial mask, scroll down! You need to use any that works effectively for yourself, but when you utilize olive or coconut oil while in the mask and afterwards use an oil infused moisturizer, it could bring about breakouts When you've got oily or blend skin. OEM ODM rorec moisturizing nourishing Olive honey aloe vera pomegranate blueberry cucumber sheet face mask Normally the potential risk of salmonella is incredibly lower; particularly if you already know in which your eggs originate from. So, I don’t Individually be concerned about it in the least. This write-up has some fantastic info on it: Can used coffee grounds work Within this recipe? I’d choose to use the grounds from my espresso device soon after my morning coffee! Mash 1 ripe banana to make a thick paste and increase ½ tbsp of turmeric and ½ tbsp of baking soda and mix all ingredients effectively for making a high-quality paste. You may also include small drinking water if this paste seems thick. "I love some truly basic approach to get care the skin by Do-it-yourself, mainly because I am a rookie in caring for skin." step toremedies

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I only use normal soap when bathing. I smoke. Now I just want to get my original complexion again Primarily on my face. I started off offering raw lemon to my face for 3 days. Practically nothing happened. I want some straightforward suggestions to unravel this. Thanks. In Girls of coloration, skin may perhaps surface ashy or uninteresting from dead skin buildup. These face masks, coupled with regular exfoliation and everyday utilization of moisturizers really should soothe dry, chapped skin. I've troubled skin including clogged pores on my forehead and many blackheads on my nose, what would you suggest is the best pure remedies for extracting the dirt and oil in my pores? my skin can get dry really effortlessly however it has a tendency to be very oily :(( woooooow!!!!!!magnificent interesting face masks…:D I've a lot of troubles on my face like dark spots,tough skin,blemishes…:( i just need to know the quantity of times in each week I am able to use these masks????and can i utilize only banana daily???thanks…:) Ooo! Really like that, Elizabeth! I accustomed to place aloe on my face (and hair!), but haven’t in awhile. I blew with the leaves on my aloe plant so immediately executing that, but I really like the concept of obtaining the huge types and doing it the best way you are doing. The egg white aids minimize surplus sebum within your skin by shrinking the scale within your pores. It will even give your skin a firmer plus more even appear by greatly minimizing bigger pores. Banana is full of some very important natural vitamins and nutrients which make banana face masks extraordinary elegance fix. Bananas safeguard our skin from free radicals and thus delay the growing old method. Many people go to the extent of terming bananas as Mom Character’s pain-free minimal-Price Botox. Clean your face that has a delicate soap and use a soft towel to pat it dry. Apply the mask on to your face, using your cleanse fingers and massage it totally onto your face for a minute. Utilize a 2nd thick coat onto your face and let it sit with your face for quarter-hour to allow the mask to work its magic! Pamper your self with a simple, exfoliating, Do-it-yourself face scrub you could make in your house. All you would like is brown sugar and olive oil, and you may whip up an amazing remedy to securely cleanse off People dead cells! Honey, On the flip side, is a natural humectant that helps the skin retain its humidity. It works equally as proficiently to be a normal cleanser and exfoliant to promote clear and glowing skin. Lower your worry stages. https://www.pinterest.com/pin/722616702689410044/ can not only wreck havoc on your mind and slumber, but your skin as well. It may lead to acne, breakouts, as well as other skin challenges. Set real looking plans and limitations on your own, and depart time each week so that you can do things that you take pleasure in. Also, if you are emotion additional generous make sure you go away some encouraging suggestions inside the feedback part at The underside from the site. I like acquiring feedback from website visitors. It can really encourage me to write much more natural remedies which have been affordable and productive! (i) Utilize pine apple juice under your eyes, leave it on for twenty-twenty five minutes and then rinse it off. Creating this a habit will help you treat wrinkles generally speaking in addition to in protecting against the early onset of wrinkles. I have compiled some superb facial scrubs that get the job done just in addition to the dear scrubs, but all genuinely all natural and organic and cost literally pennies.

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These 4 honey face mask recipes use different added components, based on your skin form. They may be all designed with meals-based ingredients which are probably in your kitchen area today. Uncomplicated and practical! The ideal way to get the demanded nutritional vitamins and nutrients you would like for any radiant complexion is feeding on a healthful, well balanced diet program. (ii) Use grape seed extract topically to take care of your deep facial wrinkles. You should purchase grape seed extract from well being meals store. @haso: Lemon juice is an efficient way to deal with melasma. Its acidic mother nature and vitamin C part improve the discolorations and peel off the outer layer on the skin. Use the juice within the affected locations, frivolously massage to get a handful of seconds, leaving it on for 10 minutes. I may even convey to the difference between Uncooked honey manufacturers I take advantage of for my honey mask. A high quality regional raw honey designed my skin glow in a means I didn’t observe with the other Uncooked honey I tried. You will discover a fantastic source of high quality Uncooked honey Below. By combining bananas with other components crammed with powerful nutrients, we could make face masks that serve many reasons. We're going to take a look at banana face masks that struggle wrinkles, banishing acne, Command oil, lighten skin, and a lot more. Packed with citric acid, lightens dark skin and evens out discoloration. Diminishes dim spots and pimples blemishes. My skin is mixture of each, too much oil often on my forehead. I tired applying medicated soaps ( I utilised med soap acne, salic lac foam and so forth) now I ended employing each one of these. Please counsel some fantastic face packs in order to avoid oil on my forehead and compact acne on my forehead. Hope you all are in the pink of one's wellness and savoring this attractive spring period. Nowadays early morning, I had orange marmalade and orange sandwich…oops veg sandwich in my breakfast. Egg whites assistance tighten skin, generating them a powerful property remedy for minimizing visual appearance of crow’s-feet less than and around eyes. wikiHow is usually a wiki similar to Wikipedia, which implies that lots of of our articles are composed collaboratively. To generate this short article, eighty four folks, some anonymous, worked to edit and make improvements to it after a while. Groups: Egg Face Masks (i) While implementing a organic face mask such as this, help it become sure to stand in excess of your sink or in rest room to prevent slippage on the floor. I washed it off immediately and dint Permit the banana operate its magic. What might be the issue ? Thanks Elizabeth is the founder and inventive director in the Nourished Existence. Her mission is to help people today discover a much more well balanced (less stress filled!) approach to living a happy, balanced daily life. Browse more details on Elizabeth below.

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Add the honey for the egg white and lemon juice, and blend almost everything once more. You will need ½ tablespoon of honey. Make sure that it's the translucent, runny form. Honey is antibacterial and functions as being a purely natural antiseptic. It is also moisturizing and assists replenish the skin.[ https://www.wikihow.com/Take-Care-of-Your-Skin ] You are able to but it really's advisable which you utilize a darkly coloured glass bottle, not plastic, for purity. Undoubtedly use inside a few days because the oil Houses will lessen with time and heat. what an incredible tip, thank you Susan! And thanks Kelly for the recipe, can’t hold out to try it! Just obtained into oil cleaning so nearly anything oil on my face super enthusiast of. Not if done correctly. You shouldn't place a lot of on your face that it drips. Having said that, it is better to help keep a napkin beneath your face in the event that it does. • Get ready an exfoliating face mask in your own home by Mixing an egg white, two tablespoons of non-Excess fat milk powder, a person tablespoon of oatmeal, and 50 % a cup of orange juice. Turmeric not merely helps take care of acne, however it could also take in extra oil out of your skin and lighten discoloration. When making use of the combination, function upwards from your chin to the cheeks after which for your forehead working with a delicate circular movement. Clean your face with a gentle cleanser. Use a gentle cleanser to wash your face with lukewarm water, then pat your face dry having a clear, dry washcloth. Clean face with Mild cleanser and pat dry. Use lukewarm drinking water and gently massage your face when you wash it. You should definitely rinse it perfectly. Be gentle as you pat your face dry so as to not irritate your skin. On this certain face mask, we're going to about to include other wrinkle-busting ingredients too to variety a strong combination. Masks are a well-recognized and vivid factor in several folk and traditional pageants, ceremonies, rituals, and festivals, and are sometimes of an historical origin. The mask is Usually a Section of a costume that adorns the whole system and embodies a custom important to the spiritual and/or social lifetime of the Group as whole or a particular team within the community. Masks are made use of Just about universally and keep their electricity and thriller the two for his or her wearers and their viewers. Clean your face with a mild cleaning soap and pat it dry which has a smooth towel. Applying thoroughly clean fingers, rub the mask into your face. Utilize the mask in a rather thick layer and hold it on for 10 to quarter-hour in order that it could possibly soak in. Utilize a ripe avocado so that it's much easier to mash it right into a lump-cost-free paste. You may also freeze, then thaw it ahead of mashing to generate factors simpler. If you have a blender, use it rather than a fork to immediately and successfully Mix the avocado into a lump-cost-free puree. I must try this. You've got discussed what Just about every on the involved ingredient does And that i am persuaded. Perhaps, I can use lime in place of lemon as there are lots of limes the place we at the moment are.

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Dermatologists appreciate baking soda as it’s equally anti-inflammatory and antibacterial. Blend it with exfoliating lemon juice and calming honey and you've got a mild but successful mask to help protect against acne. This mask really should not be employed on currently dry skins, and it can be a good idea to consult with a health care provider prior to utilizing this mask. Thanks Martha & Of course I totally concur along with you..Sometimes It can be greater to utilize the regular kitchen solutions for skin care than significant-stop skin care products. This support enables you to join or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, to be able to receive cash from ads with your article content. No data is shared Except if you engage with this particular function. (Privateness Plan) Warning: Prolonged utilization of aspirin or major doses need to be averted, as it might leave the skin excessively dry and ensure it is glimpse yellow. Aspirin does not accommodate all skins, which also needs to be carefully thought of When selecting which face mask to make use of. Coffee and cocoa face masks have prolonged been a favorite of splendor aficionados. As a combination, they decrease puffiness while in the face as well as the eye spot, brighten skin and wake up a uninteresting complexion (good day caffeine!). This facial mask recipe operates great it does not matter your skin type. Not surprisingly, there'll be no Uncomfortable side effects however the effort you set in to the making and persistence may well go in fail. So when it is with regard to the Do it yourself face masks you need to be pretty precise of the proportions. Honey face masks can help you fade acne scars and in many cases out skin discolouration, giving your bright and toned skin. I operate with a girl that's in her sixty's. She came in glowing just one early morning just last 7 days, she appeared more youthful and refreshed. She advised me about this. She says it will eventually have a year off of you. So Will not chuckle right until you try it.... This pimple-combating face mask has a few powerhouse components which you can discover in each kitchen area. It’s simple for making and super reasonably priced; you merely can’t manage to overlook the many Rewards! How usually ought to i use this mask, i meant the 1st mask and might i make use of a toner on my face following employing the primary mask. Yogurt can be utilized on any type of skin but Specially on mature skin thanks to its substantial lactic acid content. Other Positive aspects that Yogurt delivers to your complexion involves: This mask is somewhat sticky and is usually a soreness to have off. Only, use lukewarm h2o and Carefully scrub your face until finally it starts easily coming off. Then you can use cold water to wipe off the rest. As portion if my "nighttime regime", I use the Comprised of Earth Sea Kelp Clay Mask - I actually Allow it sit around the skin, after it dries, for approximately 10 minutes then I rinse it off with warm drinking water! And It will come off easily and the outcome are promptly observed. This mask has worked miracles for my skin!

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Avocado has very good dampness in it and it hydrates the skin which makes it supple and gentle. Banana is useful in opposition to inflammation and skin cracks. Take into consideration subsequent up with a few moisturizer. The lemon During this mask could be a tiny drying to your skin. If you discover that the face is somewhat dry, use some moisturizer to your face. In short, you don't need to use brand-new coffee beans. https://steptoremedies.com/benefits-aloe-vera-face-overnight/ is certainly a terrific way to reuse, recycle and also have a far more sustainable coffee routine. eyerid serum is ideal cures for make skin glowing and gentle i am also making use of that very same solution have confidence in me in one particular week i bought awesome consequence. Independent the egg. Crack an egg more than a bowl, and transfer the yolk from shell to shell. Every time you transfer the yolk, a small amount of the egg white ought to movement into the bowl. Retain doing this until eventually the entire egg white is while in the bowl. "My face may be very oily and I have blackheads on my nose and chin. This labored very well, I'll be working with it twice every week To any extent further."..." extra AO Afi Owusu @Anne Harrison: Hello there and welcome! Whey drinking water is not merely excellent for skin, but also for hair! It softens skin and leaves it hunting smoother and much healthier. Whey h2o also is made up of Dwell cultures of helpful microbes which can help equilibrium skin's pH far too. • Just take fifty percent a banana, mash it in a very bowl with the help of the fork or spoon, and mix one particular tablespoon Just about every of orange juice and honey in it. Utilize https://www.wikihow.com/Have-a-Good-Face-Care-Routine made beauty recipe for quarter-hour and then wash it off with lukewarm drinking water.   It’s vital that you be Light so you don’t bring about any microscopic tears on the skin’s surface, which could lead to breakouts or simply typically significantly less healthier-hunting skin. i have tiny pours on my cheeks and nose and also acne trouble…. please enable me to eliminate this.. The way it operate: Bananas have antioxidants and vitamin C in them as well as other minerals. They assist to lower wrinkles and fine traces. You should use this mask every single day. Following applying https://www.facebook.com/steptoremedies/posts/2099744330118836 , if you feel your skin remains dry you can use a very good selfmade moisturizer ( ) or almost every other moisturizer of your choice. A little cinnamon oil can be used Together with the coconut oil, but I might only use a fall or two in a small jar of coconut oil–in excess of that could melt away the skin. To complete your registration you should enter the verification code you received in your cellular. When you have not acquired the verification code, be sure to SMS REWARDME to 9223347100

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Oats is a fantastic natural scrub that aids in finding rid on the dead skin cells and reveals a glowing and lighter skin tone. A few images of a similar woman noh mask exhibiting how the expression variations having a tilting of the head. In these photos, the mask was affixed to a wall with continuous lighting, and just the digital camera moved. Masks are an essential A part of lots of theatre forms through planet cultures, and their usage in theatre has often created from, or continues to generally be A part of old, extremely refined, stylized theatrical traditions. Contemporary theatre Warning: Kelp could be allergenic to some resulting from its superior iodine written content. Also, kelp might be full of metallic pollutants like guide and cadmium, due to the fact virtually all industrial sewage and wastes are finally dumped in the seas. Simply just distribute the oil more than your skin after a bath or shower, similar to you'd probably with frequent lotion or entire body butter. Constantly browse the label to make certain that the oil you happen to be having is pure rather than combined in with other oils. Korean masks have a long tradition connected with shamanism and later on in ritual dance. Korean masks had been Employed in war, on the two troopers and their horses; ceremonially, for burial rites in jade and bronze and for shamanistic ceremonies to generate absent evil spirits; to recollect the faces of great historic figures in Loss of life masks; and during the arts, notably in ritual dances, courtly, and theatrical performs. Oats don't just nourishes skin of all kinds and also absorbs extra sebum from inside of your pores as it is actually an absorbent. This acne-fighting mask presents nourishing, exfoliating and cleaning Advantages to skin. You'll find numerous types of masks Employed in Africa. In West Africa, masks are used in masquerades that type Portion of religious ceremonies enacted to talk to spirits and ancestors. Examples would be the masquerades of the Yoruba, Igbo, and Edo cultures, which includes Egungun Masquerades and Northern Edo Masquerades. The masks are often carved with an extraordinary ability and wide variety by artists who will often have gained their instruction as an apprentice to the master carver - routinely it is a tradition that's been handed down inside of a household by way of a lot of generations. There’s one thing about coffee! Its a things that Many individuals are unable to Stay devoid of, I'm able to, but I'm sure quite a few who certainly need their vital dose of cuppa in their life. Furthermore, in beauty business, coffee is raved about its elegance benefits. Scrubs, human body butters, body lotions, face creams proclaiming the goodness of coffee have caught our consideration And that i get coffee-prosperous splendor stuff for its fantastic and loaded aroma Regardless that I'm not a compulsive coffee drinker, I hardly ever have coffee! This sort of masks endure during the alpine regions of Austria and Switzerland, and should be linked with hunting or shamanism, and are generally specially related to the New 12 months and Carnival festivals. Will not pick your pimples. You can make the inflammation worse and you have a method higher hazard of getting a scar even soon after it goes absent. There are a variety of fine solutions for receiving rid of pimples in this post on wikiHow. To start out receiving timely alerts, as proven down below click the Green “lock” icon next to the handle bar Masks may suggest a tradition's excellent of feminine splendor. The masks of Punu of Gabon have remarkably arched eyebrows, Practically almond-formed eyes and also a slim chin. The lifted strip managing from each side in the nose on the ears characterize jewellery. Dim black hairstyle, tops the mask off. The whiteness on the face depict the whiteness and wonder with the spirit environment. one : a mask or protecting covering for the face Large fumes compelled authorities to supply inhabitants inside the fast vicinity from the spill with face masks …— Bill Hewitt and Terry Smith … jersey figures outline the participant in soccer, where helmets and face masks make it more challenging to identify a player's face.

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OEM ODM rorec aloe vera olive pomegranate blueberry honey pure skin mask for face masks skin care I've experimented with coffee honey nd lemon blended face pack nd it is de facto powerful to my skin….u should try out it the moment ?? In the closed glass jar from sunlight and warmth. In that circumstance it's going to final so long as the expiration date over the oil you employed (Ordinarily 1-two many years). Contemplate next up with some moisturizer. The lemon in this mask could be a minor drying for your skin. If you find that the face is a little dry, apply some moisturizer in your face. I use yellow Section of the egg for 30 mins right before inportant event. it takes the lifeless skin away and can make my skin smooth and glowy A fairly easy approach to individual yolk from whites is you crack an egg into a bowl and take an vacant water bottle and squeeze it, ensure you maintain that grip. then place the hole of your bottle earlier mentioned the yolk and let that grip go and it really should suck the yolk into the bottle. Mix perfectly and utilize a uniform coating in excess of your face, Specially within the regions with excessive facial hair. Connected Searches for face mask: Children face mask fishing face mask cartoon face mask professional medical mask monkey face mask beard face mask kevlar face mask nurse face mask breathable face mask watertight face mask antibacterial face mask plague health practitioner mask mouth mask rather face masks 3m n95 mask More... And why to purchase when you can Do it yourself! Of course, property fruit facials are an awesome skin care you are able to incorporate in your schedule. Plus the fruit you can use is banana! Bananas are offered all the year spherical and are quite powerful for that skin. Here are several wonderful homemade banana face mask recipes have a look and take a look at it at your property, Use lukewarm water along with a facial cleanser ideal to your skin type. You could clean your face with clean palms, a washcloth, or even a tender sponge. Stick to up with some toner and moisturizer. "It was super easy and easy to perform. I'll carry on carrying out this facial for any clean and younger seeking skin. Many thanks." RD Rylie Doosendorf Ultimately, whisk the combination together with a fork and utilize it for your face using your fingers or a cotton ball. To find out how to create a nourishing egg facial mask, scroll down! Strategy: Mix them all inside a bowl and apply a thick coat on the face. Permit it do the job its magic for 15 minutes right until it dries out. Then rinse with water and dry your face using a towel. Implement a moisturiser right away to stay away from dry skin. Select one which fits your skin kind and you are with your strategy to identifying lots of great things about honey for your personal skin!

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(Notice: My video taking techniques obviously aren't the top!) Moist your fingers and begin rubbing inside of a circler motion all over your face for around forty five seconds. Start out rinsing! Their 3 most important cults use seventy-eight different types of masks. A lot of the ceremonies with the Dogon culture are key, Even though the antelope dance is shown to non-Dogons. The antelope masks are tough rectangular packing containers with various horns coming out of the very best. The Dogons are pro agriculturists as well as the antelope symbolizes a hard Doing the job farmer.[28] Disclaimer: The information on This great site is generic, informational and adjunctive at ideal, but are not able to serve as a substitution for professional health care tips. All through the environment, masks are made use of for his or her expressive power for a function of masked general performance - equally ritually and in numerous theatre traditions. The ritual and theatrical definitions of mask use regularly overlap and merge but nevertheless supply a helpful basis for categorisation. I’ve been employing an historic Asian masks for a few days now and my skin feels terrific! The recipe for a huge bowl is: one spoon of pure termeric powder (yellow-brownish spice), two spoons of pure honey, two spoons of all pure yogurt ( any will do), 2 spoons of brown rice powder, half of a lemon, and you might incorporate 1 egg white although the egg white isn’t in the initial recipe. You can also prepare a Do-it-yourself face mask to remove facial hair by mixing egg whites with excess-great white sugar and corn starch. The sugar and corn starch transform the whisked egg whites right into a peel-off mask on drying. Just gonna say in this article, you might be missing out by not using the yolk. I defeat a single egg nicely and set it in a small glass jar for storage in my fridge. Just about every early morning I just take it out and generously utilize it all over my face. When applying the mixture, operate upwards out of your chin towards your cheeks after which to your forehead utilizing a gentle circular movement. Turmeric powder and orange juice have powerful skin-lightening Houses and make this mask an unbelievably powerful cure for acne scars and dim places, far too. “Clinical trials have revealed that honey is a successful broad-spectrum antibacterial agent. https://www.wikihow.com/Apply-Face-Masks-Correctly got a lot of oomph that it may even end the ‘superbug’ MRSA from increasing. In https://steptoremedies.com/home-remedies-pimples/ , Schumann's influence combined with the early avant-garde artists to really encourage groups like Moving Picture Mime Show and Welfare Point out (both in britain). These businesses experienced an enormous affect on the next technology of teams Performing in Visible theatre, such as IOU and Horse and Bamboo Theatre, who produce a theatre by which masks are used in addition to puppets, movie and other Visible forms, having an emphasis to the narrative construction.[52] Practical masks A fascinating illustration of a sporting activities mask that confounds the protective perform could be the wrestling mask, a mask most generally used in the Mexican/Latin lucha libre kind of wrestling. Sugar: It is Mild to be a scrub and will not clog pores. Honey: It is a great moisturizer and assists endorse wound healing. Masks are a well-known and vivid component in lots of folk and common pageants, ceremonies, rituals, and festivals, and are frequently of the ancient origin. The mask is Usually a A part of a costume that adorns The entire physique and embodies a tradition important to the spiritual and/or social lifetime of the Local community as complete or a particular group inside the Local community. Masks are used Practically universally and sustain their electric power and thriller both equally for his or her wearers and their audience.

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Refrain from speaking or smiling With all the mask on for the reason that stretching the restricted skin may well bring about wrinkles to appear. Thanks to the egg white mask I am going to try out it... I am desperate to see the outcome in just a few days!!! How much time will I really have to utilize it to begin to see the extraordinary outcomes? Hello! Healthmunsta, I thank you for sharing this short article about egg white face mask. After i was in high school, I'd a Instructor who told me that she takes advantage of egg white and milk combination for her face mask. Short article SummaryX To produce an egg facial mask, begin by cracking an egg and separating the egg white as well as yolk. Then, discard the yolk and include a few teaspoons of lemon juice along with a 50 % teaspoon of honey for the egg white. Decrease your pressure ranges. Worry can don't just wreck havoc in your mind and snooze, but your skin also. It may lead to acne, breakouts, along with other skin challenges. Established practical plans and limits on your own, and leave time every week so as to do things which you appreciate. Put the egg white and orange juice in a little mixing bowl and whisk right until it gets frothy. Incorporate in turmeric powder and blend extensively. Be certain the combination is not also drippy. Utilizing clean fingers, use the combination for your face and therapeutic massage in a very round movement, permitting it to sink deep into your skin. Exactly how much you exfoliate is up for discussion. Some Girls have skin that gets scaly promptly. Other folks seem dewy and clean with small fuss. Dermatologist Dr. many thanks for that idea.I will attempt it out,i under no circumstances understood that banana could possibly be Utilized in so numerous ways.are not able to hold out to implement it.Thanks.' Egg white is perfect for tightening and toning skin. It works wonders for greasy skin by shrinking huge pores within the skin surface, thereby lowering excess sebum. Hello there. I'm a novice in applying DIY wellbeing cures, so I really favored your facial recipes! I have discoloration on my face (which is not too lousy) from the physique allergic reaction. Get seven to nine hrs of rest Each and every night. Not having plenty of slumber may make your skin surface boring and sallow. It can also cause bags or shadows beneath your eyes. Obtaining enough slumber will cut down wrinkles and under-eye puffiness. It will also give you a balanced, glowing complexion.[fifteen] Honey and avocado are the right combo of hydrating ingredients for dry skin. Floor almonds Carefully exfoliate, as well as their good fats go away your skin feeling Tremendous soft. If you'd like to add even more moisturizing Positive aspects, incorporate a tablespoon of oil to the combination. This is employed to gather facts on visitors to articles together with other webpages on our website. Until you happen to be signed in into a HubPages account, all Individually identifiable info is anonymized. Uncomplicated: Individuals salt crystals are way too huge and may possible tear her skin. When selecting an exfoliation method, keep in mind you should deal with your skin Carefully. Micro-tears are usually not superior for that skin. Salt scrubs are in fact well known but opt for little crystals like the ones inside a standard desk salt.

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Guidance: Set all ingredients into a considerable bowl and stir right up until it results in being sticky and thick. Apply the mask on your face for five minutes and wash face comprehensively by using a mild facial soap. There are https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjUKl_IhthU that you choose to almost can’t go wrong with in DIY skincare. And honey is unquestionably at the top from the listing. This kitchen pantry staple continues to be Employed in food items and drugs Considering that the Stone Age. Here’s why your skin loves it, also. Rich in wholesome Unwanted fat and vitamin E, the nutritious avocado may help feed and lubricate withered skin, offering it a supple look and feel. Only unfold the oil over your skin after a tub or shower, similar to you should with standard lotion or system butter. Usually read through the label to ensure that the oil you happen to be acquiring is pure instead of combined in with other oils. Your just lately considered items and featured recommendations › View or edit your browsing historical past Here are several truly straightforward Do-it-yourself face mask recipes that have become highly regarded between honey lovers. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O5WCtJnBt8 and substances involved with Every single mask are so easy that you can get ready it in a few minutes. Listed below are recipes for the best a few face masks for acne. Make sure you get rid of all make-up and wash your face comprehensively just before implementing these purely natural face packs. Cleaning your face allows unclog pores and allows the masks to penetrate deep into your skin. Honey incorporates a hefty serving of antioxidants for moisturized and vivid skin. Polyphenols in honey ruin no cost radicals that cause oxidative stress in skin cells, thus slowing down the ageing means of skin. Honey in your skin is largely character’s wonder, and these four Uncooked honey face mask recipes are some of my favorite handmade recipes for nourishing my skin. Time and energy to say goodbye to acne and pimples. Blend orange peel powder with oatmeal and baking soda to make the final word pimple annihilation face mask. > Who doesn’t would like to scent superior all day long extensive? An excellent scent can not simply cause you to scent great, it can boost your self esteem manifold. Honey is of course antibacterial, which assists your skin combat off acne. In addition it has an an amazing antioxidant capacity, and you wish antioxidants all over to fight the absolutely free radicals that injury the skin. In the event the time is up, rinse your face gently until eventually all of the mixture is totally gone. Pat dry which has a towel. When your face is dry just after this mask, utilize a fall of coconut or olive oil for a pure moisturizer. Egg whites don’t just function to tighten and nourish your skin, In addition they are incredibly rich in collagen and will transform your skin’s elasticity. This consequently lessens the appearance of wrinkles and crow’s-ft about your eyes.

coffee face mask Fundamentals Explained

Of course, this will likely sound unbelievable however it’s a fact that banana combined with couple of other ingredients may help in dealing with and blocking the skin from acne. Permit it keep for 20 to thirty minutes. This mask may possibly provide you with a tingly experience but shortly it is going to fade. Don’t fail to remember to change your dresses just before making use of this mask. Spot the ripe banana in a small mixing bowl and mash it by using a fork right up until you've got a lump-totally free paste. Then blend from the honey and lemon juice and Mix all ingredients extensively. This is certainly accustomed to discover distinct browsers or equipment when the access the service, and is also utilized for protection explanations. This solution for balancing the skin’s natural oils might be repeated twice in per week for best final results. i have compact pours on my cheeks and nose and in addition acne dilemma…. make sure you support me to get rid of this.. In case you have an American model coffee machine, utilize the coffee grinds while in the filter; if you have an Italian type device, just unscrew and take away the debris left between the areas of the cafetiere. (ii) Right after making use of a face mask, consider massaging your face with ice cubes wrapped inside a tender towel. This will likely perform to close opened skin pores and prevent Dust and pollution from making their way into your skin pores. Alternatively, it is possible to clean your face with cold water. Thnx quite a bit fr ur quick rply chandni…m much relievd nw…m happy dat i cme on diz web page n meet a frnd like u…thnx fr this sort of helpful n uncomplicated Do it yourself property fce packs undoubtedly as ud skin luks so obvious gorgeous n youthful wil test dem as i hve dry skin…can u suggest a fairly easy remedy fr less than eye dark circles thnx in advnce "How often to employ this face mask? Tend not to use everyday, as more than exfoliation of skin is not really essential. Use it at any time different day or 3 situations per week." Clean your face initial and your arms too because you don’t to use a face mask on soiled face. So just after this utilize a thick layer of this mask with your face. Should the orange peel powder and oatmeal utilised with each other feels just a little rough with your skin, incorporate extra olive oil but don’t make it much too runny as it is going to make a drippy mess. I had been doing some analysis on utilizing honey for acne, And that i found this text. Below’s a fascinating quotation: Here's most effective 6 DIY egg white face masks that are easy to get ready and might help solve a wide range of skin problems to provide you with toned and gorgeous skin. If wanted, you could discover various hacks to independent the egg’s yolk and whites.

A Simple Key For coffee face mask Unveiled

Great Hub! Head examining mines out? Incidentally if any one want to adhere to me I'll follow you right back! I want to create a network of followers, the greater the merrier, you scratch my again I scratch yours! Do it once a week, preferably when you have your 'spa day at your house'. Should you have enough time, do it each other working day. Be sure to examination to make certain your skin will not be delicate to lemon. Test diluting the lemon juice with drinking water to lower discomfort. Hope this will help. Pursuing the rules listed here and generally using very good care of yourself (having well, having plenty of rest, exercising, taking care of tension effectively - you'll find articles or blog posts on every one of these topics right here if you need them) can assist. Observe excellent hygiene, avoid touching your face, clean your outfits and pillowcases/sheets often, use a purely natural laundry detergent If you're able to, and prevent applying dryer sheets or material softener (they will aggravate acne for a number of people). As a consequence of they both seriously good to scale back significant pores, also tighten them. As oranges are filled with vitamin C which Obviously exfoliates your skin. It provides you with an acne no cost skin it also helps make your skin brighter that previous ever. It gives you the glow that you simply’ve normally wanted. Your superior skin care product or service s that are available as acne creams, or cleanses, or oil harmony goods will have to contain this component. That is accustomed to identify specific browsers or equipment in the event the obtain the service, and is also used for protection causes. I’m confident you listened to countless health advantages of pomegranate but Do you realize it does miracles for skin too? Yes, it’s legitimate as it's thrice a lot more antioxidant than purple wine or eco-friendly tea. Smoking cigarettes will make your skin appear older and contributes to wrinkles. Cigarette smoking narrows the small blood vessels while in the outermost levels of skin, which decreases blood stream and makes skin paler. This also depletes the skin of oxygen and nutrients that are important to skin wellbeing. As we are aware that acne hurt any one at any time. so these banana face masks are your ultimate solution. As acne doesn’t only have an impact on physically but emotionally also it helps make our self-self esteem reduced. Hi, many thanks for The good short article! I have already been employing egg-white now for some several years, but it had been instinctive instead of acquiring read about it online. @vishnum969: Without a doubt, egg white is extremely productive For most skin disorders which includes acne susceptible skin and getting old skin. Inside of a clear mixing bowl, whisk together the egg white and lemon juice till the mixture gets frothy. The lemon juice masks the odour from the egg white. Add ½ teaspoon of honey and stir very well. Egg whites are high in collagen and vitamin A (which is important in the event of products that have the ability to address scars or burns). Keep the eyes distinct although making use of these banana face mask, Include your eyes with freshly Lower cucumber slices. This also enable to cut back the appearance of darkish circle underneath your eyes.

Rumored Buzz on skin care

I realized the honey and lemon were being fantastic on your skin but not the egg whites. That's the next factor I wish to test. Position the egg white and orange juice in a little mixing bowl and whisk right up until it gets to be frothy. Include in turmeric powder and blend thoroughly. Ensure that the mixture is just not much too drippy. Applying clear hands, use the combination to the face and massage in a very round movement, enabling it to sink deep into your skin. Hello am Ruckshana now i have a difficulty that is definitely skin transform and a lot more pimples and likewise my skin has become pretty rough and also dark circles also so please propose any face mask make sure you and i manufactured a solution of making tamotos each day but its not Performing yha and also no soaps is additionally Operating i detest of all this so be sure to i humbly requste you to supply me a great Alternative right now i’ll check out of with banana You should use this mask every day. Following applying this mask, if you're feeling your skin is still dry you can apply a very good handmade moisturizer ( ) or another moisturizer within your preference. When you say Egg White, will it truly need to be an true egg white or am i able to use egg white from a carton? I have an Egg white Carton And that i choose to request whether it is similar to making use of an Actual Egg white Egg. Is anyone having this? LOL! Hello chandni…plz aid me am i able to maintain milk right away on my face wil it have ny sideeffcts i implement milk with cotton n preserve it overnight n sumtimes i evn rub a Computer system of banana in excess of it n wash it in d morng…plzz lemme knw wil it hve ny sideefcts…wtng fr ur response Software: Utilize a layer with the apple honey mask with your whole face. Wait for ten to fifteen minutes and let the mask dry up a little. After that, clean the mask off While using the lukewarm h2o and anticipate the outcome! Info: Kelp is a organic detoxifier and is a superb moisturizer for skin. The minerals existing On this seaweed help to tone skin and the coarse grains of dried kelp powder, because it is mostly sold, are Great at exfoliating useless skin. Exfoliate, don sunscreen, and use light-weight lotions often, and also you’ll by no means again have to manage milia seeds. If you already have them, don’t make an effort to do anything by yourself. Talk to a dermatologist in its place. It’s superior being Protected than sorry! Exterminates micro organism, averts acne and pimples that may normally induce dim places. Has skin lightening properties. I have an incredibly bad face tan and my skin is quite sensitive.. What must I do for it? And how much time will it take for that tan to go? "My face is extremely oily and I have blackheads on my nose and chin. This labored rather well, I will be using it two times every week from now on."..." much more AO Afi Owusu After i was all-around fourteen, my hair bought a little oily from my functions. To keep my hair fresh new for a longer period following I washed it, I'd use whipped egg white on it. I set it in my damp hair, and Enable it dry, then brushed it out. My hair had additional quantity much too. In a cleanse mixing bowl, whisk alongside one another the egg white and lemon juice right until the combination turns into frothy. The lemon juice masks the odour with the egg white. Increase ½ teaspoon of honey and stir nicely.

face mask No Further a Mystery

Consider an egg as an alternative to dairy if you are an egg mask lover, or substitute oils, for example olive oil, extra virgin coconut oil, or sweet almond oil Should you have dehydrated skin. If using oils, halve the amount or It's going to be much too runny. Thanx. I am a black/african lady 0f forty one. I'm mild in complection, but my face seems to be so dull and grey. I have tried evri item but my skin retaliates skin care regimen. You may not see the results you would like without delay. Try out a mask for around one thirty day period ahead of analyzing whether you'll continue on making use of it. Warning: Many people are allergic to cinnamon and it may possibly sometimes generate irritation in those with an unusually delicate skin. For that reason, this mask really should be made use of soon after screening somewhere in addition to to the face. It could be if you utilize the ice directly to your skin. It's best in case you wrap the ice within a washcloth, then apply it to the face for one minute. Cut down your tension amounts. Strain can not just wreck havoc on your own thoughts and snooze, but your skin likewise. It may lead to acne, breakouts, and other skin issues. Set real looking targets and boundaries on your own, and go away time every week to be able to do things that you appreciate. Tdas Face mask for dust air pollution for guys Girls Young ones bike bikers air anti pollution dustproof mask washable reusable (Navy Blue) Graphic: Karen Cox/SheKnows For those who don’t have enough time to whip up an entire Do-it-yourself banana mask, a fresh banana in opposition to inflamed skin may well do the trick. Incorporate the honey towards the egg white and lemon juice, and blend anything yet again. You may need ½ tablespoon of honey. Make sure that it's the translucent, runny sort. Honey is antibacterial and acts like a purely natural antiseptic. It is also moisturizing and aids replenish the skin.[three] However, before you start Checking out the remedy choices, you'll want to fully recognize what results in acne and afterwards attempt to logically deduce how honey masks is usually helpful in its cure. Turn into a member of Reward Me and obtain unique delivers! Become a member Mixing honey, orange peel powder and yogurt makes a mask that will help you reduce acne scars and blemishes. Wash your pillowcase generally and prevent carrying hair merchandise to mattress. This may aid reduce breakouts. I believe I’ll in fact combine three and 4 mainly because I have dry and inflamed skin. Among the benefits of making use of these kinds of ingredients is they gained’t respond badly collectively like atore bought ones may possibly! Now crush and powder your peels into a wonderful powder using a foodstuff processor or blender, without having introducing any h2o.

The 2-Minute Rule for strawberry face mask

Orange peel powder Obviously has a lot of Qualities which will recover, guard and sustain gorgeous facial skin. Here are a few of the most crucial properties: In an affordable and straightforward natural beauty remedy that may be also adequate to consume, a Do it yourself banana face mask may help to quiet and cleanse skin with the transform in the seasons. The egg white helps decrease excess sebum with your skin by shrinking the scale of your respective pores. It will likely give your skin a firmer plus much more even glance by significantly lowering much larger pores. Terms & Disorders The photographs characterize precise solution however shade in the graphic and products might somewhat differ. Exactly how much you exfoliate is up for debate. Some Gals have skin that gets scaly promptly. Other folks look dewy and clean with minimum fuss. Dermatologist Dr. 4. Rice flour is really a ponder ingredient when it comes to tan removing. Applying rice flour about the skin will allow you to in having rid of stubborn age spots and tan and In addition it lightens complexion with standard use. In order to get the cucumber juice You must grate it after which squeeze the juice out of it (grate plenty of cucumber to acquire the quantity of juice you need). Everyone knows that oranges are great for wellness, ideal? But as with https://www.wikihow.com/Establish-an-Effective-Skincare-Routine , the peel truly incorporates a Significantly better focus of vitamins, minerals and nutrients as opposed to fruit itself! one. Cut or crack a banana into smaller parts, and place into a mixing bowl. Mash up the banana which has a steel spoon. A face mask geared up from orange peels may possibly sound odd in the beginning but can perform miracles for your personal skin. In case you’re possessing a challenging time believing in the merits of the ingredient, give this mask a try and you'll have a hard time believing your eyes too. This is a great mask If the skin is a bit irritated or blotchy. It really works by combining the egg white with honey and yoghurt. Egg whites tighten the skin and shrink your pores even though the yogurt nourishes your complexion. It’s like acquiring a Botox procedure! Somewhat heat the honey and incorporate it to the egg white combined with the yogurt (be certain it’s fresh). Private label hydrating firming anti-growing old new components superfine fiber mask sheet peeling face mask

Details, Fiction and coffee face mask

Combine the leftover floor coffee beans with h2o. Remember that there have to be a lot more coffee than water, since the final result must be a instead shut texture to your cream or perhaps a paste than a liquid. Some recipes alter the water for milk For additional hydration. Clean your face. Use a mild cleanser to clean your face with lukewarm drinking water, then pat your face dry with a clean up, dry washcloth. Shigong dance masks had been Employed in shamanic rituals to thank the gods, although nuo dance masks shielded from terrible spirits. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KPFg-ea8EVQ ended up utilized to pray once and for all luck and an enduring marriage, and "Swallowing Animal" masks were associated with guarding the home and symbolised the "swallowing" of disaster. There are numerous days that appear to fly by, and then there are actually the ones that seem to just take permanently. This was among the latter. I manufactured some pastry cream and cookies and wound up with 7 egg whites. I failed to These an artist holds a revered position in tribal Modern society as a result of work that he / she results in, embodying not merely elaborate craft tactics but will also spiritual/social and symbolic know-how.[27] African masks can also be used in the Mas or Masquerade on the Caribbean Carnival. Right here you are able to find out more about the many benefits of oats for that skin and the way to make oatmeal scrubs in your face. Thanks so a great deal!! https://twitter.com/steptoremedies/status/1087123555727405058 of my lifeI hhave been scuffling with acne. Experimented with anything on the market and very little will work. I'm definitely gonna try these! Thank you so a great deal for these normal treatments Thank you for producing your account on EverydayMe. This informative article or product has been added in your favorites. When you've got an American design and style coffee device, use the coffee grinds within the filter; When you've got an Italian fashion equipment, just unscrew and take away the debris remaining involving the parts of the cafetiere. The appliance of an egg white mask can clog the pores and increase the opportunity of breakouts for individuals who have acne susceptible skin. Other Negative effects incorporate the unfold of microorganisms over the skin, as raw egg whites comprise salmonella, a bacterium that can cause foods poisoning. Apply the mixture in your face. Use your fingers to Carefully therapeutic massage the combination into your face. It’s important to be Mild otherwise you might trigger the skin of your face to become irritated, which could lead on to breakouts. Combine the elements with each other in a blender or by using a fork and spoon. Apply to face, rinse off soon after 10 minutes. Bought quite oily and acne-vulnerable skin? Get worried no far more with this straightforward and cleaning orange peel face mask, that may depart your skin oil-free and moisturized at the same time! Realize that incorporating produce for your combination will lessen its shelf everyday living. Basically, Really don't make a big batch, otherwise it could go poor ahead of You should utilize it all. On top of that, if you include fruits or veggies to the facial remedy, make sure you refrigerate it.[19]

[pigmentationcream-blog]

The Black Beauty Guide: How To Treat Pigmentation On Dark Skin

best skin lightening cream When we speak about our skin care issues, acne flare-ups, interval wrinkles and pimples frequently steal the spotlight. In reality, we occasionally become so engrossed in beating blemishes and fine lines which we miss hyper pigmentation and dark stains that could be equally annoying when it comes to attaining that perfect Insta-ready complexion.

Unlike many kinds of skin injury, pigmentation pops up fairly literally immediately and can be triggered by a large number of variables. Black skin can be more vulnerable to pigmentation due to the elevated levels of saliva which exists in our skin - making it outside difficult to deal with.

For the most part, women of color, such as myself, fantasy of a more skin-tone instead of a lighter and brighter one. Irregular light and dark patches in your skin may make looking for make-up more effort than it is worth, and that I know that it's knocked my confidence over once.

The fantastic thing is the beauty business today has more options for discolouration in the marketplace than ever before. However, before we reach handling the matter, we will need to protect our skin from making it worse by discovering exactly what causes pigmentation at the first location.

It is no secret that our skin can form change throughout distinct phases, but we should not underestimate the effect that hereditary and hormonal changes may have on our complexions.

'The female hormones oestrogen and progesterone have been in play and occasionally can overstimulate melanin - particularly when sat unprotected from sunlight and through pregnancy - causing pigmentation issues called melisma or choalsma', states creator of the Dark Skin Directory, Dija Ayodele.

A vital point to notice is that darker skin-tones are only as susceptible to sun damage as their lighter counterparts. That is why sporting a solid SPF (Sun Protection Factor) daily - to safeguard the skin from damaging UVA and UVB rays - is paramount for combating pigmentation.

'Inadequate sunlight protection causes melanin cells to enter overdrive generating more dark pigment to protect the epidermis,' Dija describes. 'Sometimes this isn't a linear process and may leave skin using lentigines along with a mottled look with time.'

And then there is that fun skin condition called Post Inflammatory Hyperpigmentation that's the severe effect of skin ailments - like acne, psoriasis and eczema - which render dark scars on the skin sparked from injury. 'Usually by taking a look at the principal skin ailment and controlling variables within that, it's simpler to handle PIH', states Ayodele.

If we take a look at the Fitzpatrick scale - a numerical classification graph that measures how individual skin colors react to chemicals and UV light - girls of color fall involving type 4 to 7.

This may sound complicated, but it is really a fairly simple concept that could make looking for goods to fight pigmentation a cinch, once pumped. 'If you are considering warmer skin-tones about the Fitzpatrick scale, then it becomes evident they don't appear to tolerate quite low pH's or quite strong Ha's (Hyaluronic Acid), so rather than reacting to inflammation, dark pigments have been introduced as a defence mechanism,' explains David Delport, Education Director in REN Skincare.

'There's a very different physiological reaction to the stimulation between darker skin-tones and milder skin-tones - that is the reason why we prioritise inclusivity and operate inside the secure PH degrees of 3.5 to 4.'

Vitamin shots and IV drips are a favorite option for flawless skin amongst actors for ages.

Bianca Estelle, Medical Aesthetician and founder of Vitamin Injections London, is convinced that pigmentation on darker skin-tones could be aesthetically treated with a class of 12 vitamin shots, with clearly luminous results after only 1 jab.

'By providing the active answers right into the bloodstream, the body is able to process the remedy immediately and make sure that all of it's reaching the region it must goal,' Bianca describes. 'By addressing pigmentation in the inside out, vitamin shots act an inner tyrosine suppressant - an amino acid which can help create melanin'

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[aion-rsa]

DuckTales Season 3 Episode 11 Review: The Forbidden Fountain of the Foreverglades!

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This DUCKTALES review contains spoilers.

The juxtaposition of the fountain of youth with a spring break hotel is sheer elegance in its simplicity. It’s a perfect spin on a story that’s been told thousands of times but done in a way that fits right at home with the new DuckTales. It takes an old concept and breathes new life into it… which is fitting for the plot of this episode.

I love the bait and switch of making you think Scrooge and Goldie are doing to the fountain of youth only for Louie to casually discover what’s really going on back at the hotel. It feels out of nowhere but when you go back you see how well it was set up earlier. It’s the perfect mystery twist and this wasn’t even a mystery-centered episode! I thought it was just going to be another adventure with Goldie and Scrooge but nope! The episode faked me out! Instead we got an exploration of the two’s past and how there’s a lot of genuine regret about lost opportunities between them. 

Scrooge and Goldie have a huge competitive streak and they’ve let it get the better of them their whole lives. Returning to their youth, both wonder if they can change the past. Let that competitive streak fall away and simply give in to their passion without the greed getting in the way. Erase the bad choices they made… but you can’t do that. You aren’t going back in time, that isn’t what the fountain of youth is. You still made those mistakes and no amount of youth is going to fix them. The two instead reject the fountain and seemingly break the cycle of their old mistakes. They own up to them and choose to take a new path. 

In past Goldie episodes she had a soft spot for Scrooge but you’d be forgiven for thinking that might be an act or simply her “code” getting the way of leaving him to die. Here though I 100% believe Goldie has feelings for Scrooge and wants to make amends. This isn’t another scheme; her brief return to youth has shown her she wants to make a change. I’m sure she’ll still have a rivalry with him in the future but here we see what should be the seeds for a giant step forward in their relationship.

While the script for this episode is excellent (another winner by Madison Bateman) and lends it a lot of layers there’s of course the superb performances of David Tennant and Allison Janney that take it to another level. These are two actors at the absolute top of their game and they sell every moment between the two characters. You can hear the history in their voices, the hundreds of times they’ve crossed paths, and the hidden heartache. The casting for DuckTales has always been spot on and these two are perfect together.

Webby being along for the ride and slowly morph into a crotchety version of herself was a lot of extra fun. Sometimes the simple jokes are the best and watching Webby have to get around with Scrooge’s cane was delightful. That and Kate Micucci’s delivery of “Uncle Scrooge! And Goldie too, I guess.” Flawless.

The boys’ subplot was also hilarious and really played up the sibling rivalry between Huey and Dewey. I love how much mileage this show can get from all the different combinations of the triplets but the Huey Dewey one might be my favorite. The two aren’t as different as they might think but it’s those similarities that make their conflicts so rich. 

Also of course Huey would be mad that Dewey is taller, Huey’s dream is to be the tallest with oddly proportioned legs. I’m never going to forget about that scene from last season. Why, Huey? Why?

The only element that didn’t quite work was Rockerduck. I can only assume they wanted to bring him into the current rogues line-up but he felt tacked on. I’m hoping he gets another shot because there’s a lot of potential in the character, we just didn’t see it here.

This is another win for DuckTales. An episode that revolves around the revelation that Ponce de León is ensnaring “simple minded teens” (IN FLORIDA!) would be great on its own but the work it puts in to develop Scrooge and Goldie makes it all the better. Scrooge realizes that simply going back isn’t going to fix the bad choices they made but what they can do is face the future together and be better. That’s a solid message for anyone watching.

DuckTales Quotes To Make Your Life Better

– “What? No! Your cane is part of your mystique.”

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

– “He’s stealing youth, Goldie. I earned each wrinkle square. It’s not fair to pawn them off on someone else. Not even a teenager.”

The post DuckTales Season 3 Episode 11 Review: The Forbidden Fountain of the Foreverglades! appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[studiobowesart]

Love the Mullet: Working on Grafix Dura-lar

'Business in the front and party in the back.' Dura-lar, aka, the Mullet of painting surfaces. I first stepped into working on Dura-lar on a journey for the above. I wanted a surface that I could do detail work on the front side, but also be able to cut loose, get aggressive with my mark making on the reverse, and NOT mess up all the hard work I'd already done. I tried vellum, or the modern version of vellum that comes in a pad (like a thick tracing paper). But it wrinkled when wet. Which can have some cool effects, but not what I was after. I do Yupo once in a while, but almost all the work has to happen on the front, because it isn't nearly as translucent. Then I discovered the Grafix Dura-lar. It does not wrinkle no matter how wet you get it. And it has taken everything I have thrown at it from graphite to oil paint, like a champ.

The first thing to know is I use the MATTE version. Not the 'wet media' version. The matte will take dry media (Prisma, graphite, charcoal, pastel.) and wet media (Acrylic ink, acrylagouache, enamel, oil paint). Because the matte is translucent, and not clear, it will ghost out what ever work is done on the reverse. I love this aspect because it is automatic atmospheric perspective, and lets you judge your final, darkest accents on the front. What follows is a step by step of my Angel and Faith cover #19 for Dark Horse Comics. I am using Prisma Color pencil FW ink and Acrylagouache:   This is the level I took my digital comp before even beginning to make it real. I like to have most of the design questions answered, which frees me in the application of materials, because I can have fun with such a solid foundation beneath me.

The rough drawing is printed out and is now on my light box with the Dura-lar over the print. I have selected pencils within in a limited range of values.

 Time to DRAW! I did most of the first character with one prisma pencil. Note how FLAT prisma color goes down on duralar. It is almost like gouache!

 I work my way through the second character in darker Prisma values than the first. I am basically working in color zones through out the piece.

  Having finished the characters, I move on to the swords and the falling leaves.

 Detail shots.

For the third character I wanted a softer feel, so I used the side of the pencil for shading.

And here we have the drawing on dura-lar with a piece of white paper behind it. Any values you saw prior to this were the original print-out of my rough drawing.

I flip the drawing over and start working the back side. I mix a quick gradient of Acrylagouache on my pallet, and start filling in the transition of the leaves.

And when we flip it back over to the front, you can see the line-work over the leaves. Some ask, "Why not just do it all on the front?" And the reason is, it would be much harder to draw with colored pencil on top of lumpy paint. And I want the lines to show, for as I get older I realize the true heart of an artist is in the drawing. (No matter how you frost it.)

 Filling in the swords on the back, and the flip reveal.

The below sequence shows the puddle of value I mix for Angel, and the ham fisted 'render' I do on the back side of figures. So there will be some transition in the flat, some base structure, but the detail is all on the front.

Same thing for Faith, filling in her form on the reverse with a painted gradient and crude modeling.

 Ahh... but the magic is in the FLIP! The drawing is doing all the work!

 With my dark and middle values established, it is time to work up the highlights! Again using a range of three lighter value prisma pencils.

And here is the entire scene with the major elements drawn on front and painted on back. Now it is time to have fun!

 This is where the really aggressive things happen. Spatter, streaks, scratches it is all fair game because I know the major details of the piece will be pristine on the front.

 Flipping back over for more fun. You often have to paint in reverse, like an animation cel painter or a glass painter. Protecting things like figures with flat paint before you start up the party wagon of texture.

  And the final flip! Sometimes I will cover the entire back with white after it is done.

Hope you enjoyed it! from Muddy Colors http://ift.tt/2mUG1lH

[aion-rsa]

The Sopranos Questions That The Many Saints of Newark Can Answer

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If the pandemic was good for something, it was giving folks time to catch up on or get reacquainted with the best television series from the modern era. Are you someone who promised you’d watch The Wire if you only had the time? Well, time found you. Were you dying to revisit Breaking Bad now that you’ve had some distance? Well, what a perfect activity for social distancing! Looking to careen through 40 seasons of Survivor? The CDC has spoken!

Many people, myself included, took the opportunity to revisit arguably the greatest series of the 21st century, The Sopranos. If I couldn’t hang with my friends at a bar, I guess I could watch Tony and the gang meet-up at The Bing. If I couldn’t leave the house, at least I could commiserate with Uncle Junior. If my therapy sessions were going to be digital, I might as well have them with Dr. Melfi on my TV screen. 

It turns out that 2020 was a perfect time to revisit these degenerate, yet somehow lovable cast of mobsters, not only because time had to be occupied, but because creator David Chase’s grand return to New Jersey with The Many Saints of Newark, The Sopranos feature-film prequel, is arriving this fall. With six seasons fresh in my mind and special attention paid to the series’ casual mentions and brief flashbacks to Johnny Soprano’s heyday, I’m ready to look for continuity, expansions of lore, and fun Easter eggs galore.

The prequel is a feature film and not a series, so it’s impossible for Chase to deliver endless callbacks and fan service while also telling a satisfying, original story, but here are just a few things we’d love to see The Many Saints of Newark address when it hits theaters Sept. 24, 2021.

Tony’s Connection with Animals

We know that Tony Soprano will appear in The Many Saints of Newark, portrayed by the late James Gandolfini’s son, Michael Gandolfini. While the film looks like it will largely tell the tale of Giovanni “Johnny Boy” Soprano (Jon Bernthal), it seems likely that young Anthony will be getting plenty of screen time to satiate fan desire to see what he was like prior to his involvement in his father’s business. 

How many characteristics will the young Tony share with his considerably darker adult self? We know he’ll likely experience panic attacks, but will he also share many of the other characteristics that made Tony seem human and vulnerable, like his love of animals? From the very first episode, Tony showed real interest and empathy for animals, like the ducks in his pool. 

This is a theme that continues throughout the series, like when Tony goes nuclear on Christopher for killing Adriana’s dog, murders Ralphie over the death of his race horse, Pie-O-My, and loses his patience with his father’s old “goomar” Fran when he discovers that his father regifted their family dog to Fran and her son. It’s a small character detail that may not need a chintzy origin story moment, but maybe the young Tony dreamed of veterinary school?

Paulie Walnuts’ Relationship with Johnny Soprano

For most of The Sopranos’ run, Paulie Walnuts was used as comic relief and shown to be a relic of an era that had passed him by. But from what we heard (or what Paulie says), the young Paulie was a legit tough guy heartthrob that the whole neighborhood either feared or admired. Billy Magnussen (Game Night, Aladdin) will portray the young Paulie, the man that Tony’s father would threaten to sic on his son if he ever misbehaved.

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While the adult Tony’s admiration for Paulie waned throughout the series, it will be interesting to see whether Johnny Soprano thought of Paulie as a useful soldier or a big-mouth liability. How integral was Paulie to Johnny’s operation? The old Carmine Lupertazzi could barely even remember Paulie, was he simply just a handsome hired gun that overstated his importance to Tony’s father?

Uncle Junior’s Relationship with Young Tony

To say that Tony and his Uncle Junior had a complicated relationship throughout The Sopranos would be an understatement the size of Bobby Baccalieri, but were things always this bad? In a spot of pitch perfect casting, Corey Stoll (Ant-Man, House of Cards) will be portraying the young Uncle June and we’re curious to see how he interacts with his nephew. 

By all accounts, Junior was always a tough nut to crack with a chip on his shoulder, is it possible he gave the same attitude to Tony in his youth, which led to built up animosity years later? Or was their relationship close before competing for head of the family? It’s one of the dynamics we’re most anxious to see play out on screen.

Tony the Music Fan

Along with his love of animals, it seems like one of Tony’s other passions was music. Always singing along to some AM Gold or quick with some music trivia from the era that The Many Saints of Newark will be covering, will a young Tony Soprano be far more interested in catching episodes of Ed Sullivan than the family business?

David Chase’s one other feature film Not Fade Away focused on a suburban rock band in the late ‘60s, will Tony dabble in trying to start a group of his own? Ultimately this one is a stretch, but it would be cool to see a young Tony pouring over an issue of Music Maker or posted up by the jukebox.

Dickie Moltisanti and His Cousin, Carmella

Described as the protagonist of The Many Saints of Newark, Chrisopher Moltisanti’s father Dickie will be portrayed by Alessandro Nivola. We only know what we’re told about Dickie, and what we know is that he was a tough soldier in the Soprano crew that served in Vietnam, then went to prison soon after. Christopher said he struggled with drug and alcohol abuse as well, but Tony remembers the man as being “a standup guy” who once took on a whole crew from New England on his own. 

Perhaps we’ll see Dickie bringing a war to the Soprano’s turf in Jersey and struggle with addiction in a similar way as his son Christopher. Learning about Dickie and his history will be key to unlocking many of the wrinkles in the DiMeo crime family. It’s also worth mentioning that Dickie’s cousin is Carmela, who claims they were close, as does Tony. Will a young Carmela appear in The Many Saints of Newark and will Dickie be the one to introduce Carmella to Tony? It’s a possibility. 

Tony the Athlete

A constant point of strife between Tony and Uncle Junior is June reminding Tony that he “never had the makings of a varsity athlete.” Tony’s high school football career is alluded to often, and Tony even still has recurring dreams late in life about his old high school football coach. Will we witness young Tony lose his interest in football a la Pink in Dazed and Confused? 

Perhaps we’ll get to relive some of Tony’s interactions with his strict coach. Michael Gandolfini looks a lot like his dad, which means he’s certainly the size to portray a believable football prospect. How much time will the young Tony, if any, spend on the field in The Many Saints of Newark?

Fran the Mistress

In season 5 episode 7 of The Sopranos, Tony meets his father’s old goomar Fran Felstein, and she reveals many missing details about Tony’s father, his uncle, and close family friend, Hesh. It’s unclear if Hesh will play a role in The Many Saints of Newark, but Fran reveals a dislike of Hesh, claims that Junior was obsessed with her, and also unveils the secret that Johnny was with her the night that Livia Soprano had a miscarriage, which caused Tony to have to lie on behalf of his father. This seems like a pivotal moment in the lives of Johnny, Livia, and Tony, so it will be interesting to see if it will appear in the film, or whether Fran will be mentioned at all.

Tony and his Dad

Several times throughout the series, Tony states how he never knew where he stood with his old man. Ideally, their relationship will be the crux of the film, or at least a considerable part. It will be enlightening to see not only Tony’s relationship with his father, but how his father’s dealings impact the rest of his life. 

Tony states how, later in life, he feels like he has no contemporaries and no one to talk to. Other than Silvio, Tony’s colleagues in the gang are either old friends of his father or young upstarts, and the older members of the gang can’t help but see Tony as his father’s son. We get what it must have been like for a teenage Tony through AJ, who realizes that most of his “friends” and the people he surrounds himself with only care about his connection to crime. 

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The Many Saints of Newark will be released in theaters and on HBO Max on Sept. 24, 2021

The post The Sopranos Questions That The Many Saints of Newark Can Answer appeared first on Den of Geek.

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