#i have also had the flu for 3 weeks and its making me miserable

[robobee]

I'm having an insane amount of trouble finding anyone willing to read my porn. SERIOUSLY?@!?!?! in 2024??? walking around like a Charles dickens orphan like HELLO? OPINION ON insane threesome PLEASE? mister please spare a few minutes I saved tuppence my making me own papér.... I'm not saying it's good but it's not terrible .. or it could be terrible actually i don't know because nobody will READ ITTTT

[bokutobaes]

inarizaki boys when you have a bad day

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭ .・.

☆-with: atsumu, suna, kita

☆-!warnings!: swearing, parental issues, parents fighting, (there’s nothing physically violent), illness like the flu

☆-a/n: yall these are longgg LOL sorry

☆- author: lu <3

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭ .・.

☆ atsumu:

-his baby had a bad day :((

-just kidding he didn’t notice at first I’m so sorry nzjsjjsj

-your lockers are nearby so he’s usually waiting for you there first thing in the morning

-you woke up today with a headache and you were just really tired from studying last night :/

-you wanted to suck it up because it was your own fault for leaving the studying until the night before the test you had

-anyways, you were walking up to your locker lowkey trying to avoid eye contact with him

-“hi tsumu :)” u fricken liar with that fake smile

-“morning babe!” atsumu pulled u in for a back hug “i have to get to class kinda early for a test review so i’ll see you at lunch”

-and with that he was pecking your cheek and leaving

-“okay.. kind of good” you thought.. you didn’t wanna worry him or anything so you headed to you first class, math

-hell literally broke loose.. you forgot your pencil case and had to ask like 4 people until you got one which was embarrassing

-AND THEN the teacher called on you for an answer that you didn’t know like the universe

was against you or something

-“uhh... ummm i don’t know..” headass😩

-the class after that was slightly less dehumanizing but it was also japanese class.. the class you had a test in that you just barely studied for

-you did the test and lost braincells, blood sweat and tears LOL

-“okay class these will be graded by lunchtime so please come by to collect your scores before your next class”

-ogey :/ anyways u went to ur next class and before u knew it, it was lunch time.

-a text from atsumu made your phone vibrate while on your way to get your test scores

-“hey babe im actually gonna eat lunch with samu we’re practicing a bit at lunch”

-oh :) ok :) that’s fine :) not like u :) desperately:) need a hug :) right now :)

-“oh okay babe” you text back

-whatever u don’t need him independent queen

-that’s your mindset.. until you get those test scores

-it’s a literal fail .. did not pass the test.. ok..

-“y/n san, these test scores were not your usual best. I’m slightly disappointed, if there’s anything going on please let me know”

-“thank you sensei. i’ll do better next time.

-at this point you were just tying not to cry so you took your test and shouldered your bag and walked to a bench outside for some fresh air.

-right.. you didn’t bring lunch today

-so now you were hungry, tired, defeated, disappointed and lonely :,(

-the last class of your day went by quickly probably because you were zoned out the whole time

-the end of the day came and you were at your locker when your guardian texted you

-“Y/n, you had that test today right? I’m expecting to see the grade when your back home. Didn’t have time to make food tonight so find something to eat on your way home.”

-oh that test ? lol hahaha the one that you failed?! yeah that one haha lol lollll

-so with that, you started your walk home

-“y/n!!”

-fuck. atsumu.

-if you saw him now you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold in your tears and you really didn’t want to cry

-so your solution? pretend you didn’t hear him and walk faster lmfaokdhdh

-but atsumu, being.. well atsumu, decided to just full speed sprint towards you to put his shoulder around you

-“i literally know you heard me. i missed you today sorry about lun- why are you crying ?!!?”

-“bad day” you choked out before a shuddering gasp wracked your chest

-atsumu didn’t say anything he just wrapped you in a tight hug, petting you hair while you cried into his chest

-“its okay babe.. “ :(

-“you wanna come over? we can get food and cuddle”

-you nodded your head taking a shaky breath

-his hand reached out and wiped your tears, brushed your hair behind your ear and kissed your forehead like it was natural to him.

-and so you walked together hand in hand to atsumu’s house where you ate samu’s leftover onigiri and vented to atsumu about the day while you cuddled

-he also gave you a hoodie :,)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭ .・.

☆ suna:

-“living is a chore :|” you thought as the alarm rang through your room ruining your peaceful sleep

-it was raining outside and your mind went back to last night, the screaming match your parents had

-normally you’d be used to it but it felt like they were starting to take the anger they had for each other out on you now

-you tried not to but you started thinking about all the things your mom had yelled to you through the closed door of your bedroom

-“your just like your father. you’re selfish, lazy and all you do is run around with that little boyfriend of yours! what about your family?! you think your better then us? why don’t you move out then since your so good at being independent?!”

-everything she said was always completely blown out of proportion, she lied all the time. it’s exhausting for you

-you started getting ready for school, you wanted to see suna and your friends and laugh and just forget last night even happened

-when you got to school suna was there at your locker scrolling lazily through his phone

-you smiled, genuinely as he looked up and greeted you with a smirk

-“nice hair.”

-“wha-“ you started and then smacked his arm when you realized that your baby hairs were out of sorts “shutup” you scowled

-“good morning” suna hugged you

-“good morning”

-now you were off to class, it always went by too fast, you thought. school was always done in the blink of an eye

-“what’re you doing at lunch?” your friend tapped your shoulder and whispered to you

-“mmm nothing probably why?”

-“let’s eat on the roof today! yui told me there’s gonna be a rainbow cuz it stopped raining.”

-“okay” you smiled

-now at lunch with your friends you ate the bento you had packed before. the rainbow was there and it was beautiful

-you were having fun just laughing with your friends and texting suna while he sent terrible photos of atsumu. things were good, you had forgotten about your mom

-until the end of the day came and you had to go back home

-as usual suna was at his locker waiting so that you could walk home together

-after crossing the street you and suna were at a bike path, trees surrounding the fences

-it was a comfortable silence until...

-“what’s wrong?”

-suna asking took you by surprise, you didn’t think you were acting any different. were you?

-“what are you talking about”

-“you look sad, you did this morning too but then you were fine the rest of the day so I didn’t say anything. but, you look sad again now”

-“oh..”

-so suna just saw right through you

-“ um.. i’m okay.. it’s just ..” you laughed dryly “i don’t really want to go home”

-“did something happen?”

-“yeah.. my parents were fighting, it turned into this whole thing.” you felt a lump in your throat start to form “i don’t really wanna talk about it”

-“okay. you should just come over then, right?”

-“can i?”

-“you literally don’t even have to ask me anymore y/n” suna grabbed your hand and led the way

-when you got there suna hopped on his couch and started putting on something from netflix

-“my parents aren’t home, my sister has a dance thing today” he grabbed a blanket and you sat down, putting your head in his lap

-suna put on a comedy show, of course he would

-he played with your hair while you watched and after an episode or two, he asked

-“do you want to talk about it now?”

-and so you did, you told him what happened last night and what your mom said. your plan was to not cry but that failed miserably

-suna listened intently, he told you the truth, he said that what she said wasn’t true, he told you you could sleepover whenever you needed to.

-kissed you and wrapped you back in the blanket

-“i love you, you know that right? always.”

-he always knew what to say and you loved him for that

-“i love you too, suna”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭ .・.

☆ kita:

-kita knew, first thing he noticed when he saw you that you weren’t okay

-you woke up with a terrible headache, aching body and stomachache

-so this is it? this is hell? ok.

-but the test.. you had a test today. fortunately you had actually studied for weeks because you knew it was important

-mentally? you were ready for that test. physically? you had the spanish influenza

-so you weighed the options and decided you would go to school, take the test and then come back home after.

-the problem with that was that kita would in fact lecture you on all the reasons you should not have come to school

-he was right of course, but you still decided that you would need to avoid him for today

-spoiler alert it did not work

-your test was your third class of the day so you only had to get through 2 classes and you’d leave at lunch perfectly avoiding kita

-this was what you thought while you were at your locker until you closed it and walked directly into kitas chest

-“wow”

-“good morning y/n-chan”

-“morning kita! i have to go or I’ll be late!”

-you ran😭 and you almost got away too but kita grabbed your arm and pulled you to one side of the hallway

-he felt your forehead and both cheeks

-“you have a fever y/n”

-“no I don’t I’m just hot from walking to school”

-he said 😐

-you signed and rested your head on his chest letting your arms dangle

-“why did you come? you look sick”

-“thanks. I have a test.”

-“how do you feel?”

-you told him your symptoms but also that you were leaving right after the test and you could pull through

-he really didn’t want you to overwork yourself but he knew you were set on taking the test

-so he let you go and he made you promise to text him between classes and let him know if you felt any worse

-and off you went

-honestly, you were fine up until halfway through your second class.. then you started feeling really cold and tired even kind of nauseous

-then in the third class your test was put onto your desk and before you knew it your teacher was saying “begin”

-okay. you can do this you thought to yourself. the test was easy enough with how much you studied, you thought about every answer and you tried to finish quick

-but then it was like time cut itself in half and the bell for lunch was ringing

-you weren’t even done the test yet

-“y/n you can stay in here until your done but i expect you to have it finished soon”

-one question left

-you don’t even remember what you ended up putting before you were up and giving the paper to your teacher

-kita was right there when you left the classroom

-“hey ..hey.. y/n”

-you could barely hear him you just flopped into his arms

-“okay I’m taking you home.. “

-“but..”

-“shh let’s go”

-you don’t remember getting there but then you were in your bed smothered in pillows and blankets

-kita came in

-“what time is it?”

-he looked at his phone “half past 4”

-“4?!” you jolted up “did you even go back to school?” “kita?!”

-he smiled at you “no but it’s okay y/n it was only one day. i wanted to take care of you

-you noticed he had a steaming cup of something in his hands

-“what’s that” you asked

-“its tea, but it’s special tea :)”

-“what do you mean” you laughed

-“my grandma showed me how to make it, it’s gonna make you feel a lot better”

-he’s so cute...

-“kita... you didn’t have to do all this”

-“i wanted to” he sits beside you and hands you the tea

-literally tasted like heaven

-“mmmmm oh my god”

-kita laughed and kissed you on the cheek before joining you in the bed

-you cuddled and watched movies on your laptop until you fell asleep, comfortable in your boyfriends arms

[realm-sweet-realm]

A Worthwhile Investment, chapter 3

Please enjoy this Grant x Shawn story. Yes, I split it into two short chapters. Apparently I can’t be succinct with these two... hopefully I made the right choice!

Next is Thomas x Allison!

Time went by. The studio worsened in most respects. Though its installation was nothing out of the ordinary, it felt as though the ink machine was creeping through the halls, its long pipes growing into new areas. Wherever it went, it left the scent of sickly rubber ink and stained through the walls, like a creeping, musty black mold. That alone would have brought down morale, but it was nothing compared to the financial crisis. Every department was operating on a slashed budget, and yet Joey refused to lower his demands on any of them. Whenever someone quit out of anger, there was relief- it meant that those who remained would be less likely to be laid off. The studio was a rotting body, ravaged by the parasite of the ink machine and struggling to move its massive weight now that so many of its workers were gone.

Grant was not handling it well. His department understood that it the studio’s financial problems weren’t his fault, but he didn’t blame anyone else for hating the man who had decided how much to slash their budget, or who told them, while they were already underpaid, that their paycheck would be late because there simply was no money to pay them. It was his job to prevent this from happening. But with Joey spending more and more on Bendyland and the ink machine, and refusing to downsize anything when it was really overdue to do so, it was proving impossible. It was soul-crushing.

Things weren’t easy on Shawn, either. Fewer staff for the same amount of plushes meant having to work longer and faster, and making plushes out of cheaper materials meant that there was less room for error before the cheap, delicate things they’d been reduced to selling simply fell apart. Shawn was getting screamed at more than usual nowadays.

At least they had each other. During better times, their relationship had been on and off. There were periods when one of them just couldn’t handle the other’s issues or couldn’t handle being in a relationship at the moment, and they’d break up, only to get back together after a while. Shawn had even dated other people during their temporary breaks. Neither of them were especially serious about their relationship, so it worked for them. Now, they were together for the foreseeable future. There was little time or energy for romance anymore, but they stole the moments they could and hoped that things would eventually improve. Shawn had even moved into Grant’s house at the time. This was good for both of them- living with someone else made things easier domestically during this busy time, and it was good to come home from a difficult day at work and meet up with someone who loved you and brightened your mood.

“Ah think we should quit,” Shawn said one day over dinner. “None-a this is healthy. I’m sick of it, you certainly ain’t yourself, and anyhow, yer always saying the company won’t last another year.” Shawn saw Grant hesitate. “Well, Ah’m quitting. Join me or don’t, Ah don’t care.”

“I have a feeling that things will improve once Bendyland opens. It’s supposed to open in three months,” well, it was supposed to open over a year ago, but hopefully they could reach the new deadline, “so, let’s see where the studio is in five months. If we’re not having a much better time at work by then, let’s do it. Or you can quit sooner- please, don’t let me hold you back. But that’s when I’m doing it.”

“Five months sounds great! I’ll mark it on the calendar. To a chance at a better life!”

Grant forced a smile. “To a chance at a better life.” He honestly wished Shawn would just quit so that he didn’t feel like he was holding him back.

There were a few reasons that Grant didn’t want to quit. It wasn’t about money (he had some saved up), or fear that he couldn’t get another job (he had the experience to land another). Mostly, it was about pride. Grant might be the financial manager of a failing massive company, but still, he was the finances manager of a massive company- with a department working under him and his own secretary. This could be the highest-profile job he would ever have. He also worried that the next job would be just as miserable. He recognized, though, that he couldn’t stay in an awful work environment for those reasons, let alone keep Shawn in one. And no matter what, the studio would be dead in a few years, so he’d have to leave it eventually. And heck- maybe Shawn was right. Maybe it would be better.

---

It was while Grant was walking down one of the Joey Drew Studios hallways that it happened, though it had seemed rather insignificant at the time. A burly, blond GENT worker deliberately loosened a bolt on one of the ink pipes as he passed, spraying a cloud of ink fumes into his face.

“That’s for getting my buddy laid off,” the man grumbled as Grant coughed on the fumes.

“Hey!” another GENT worker, shouted, “pull another stunt like that, and you’ll be the one leaving for good!” The GENT worker ran over to Grant. “You alright, sir? I can pay for the dry cleaning if you want.”

“Don’t bother,” Grant snapped, “just teach your men some respect.”

Grant looked down at his thoroughly stained suit and dress shirt and weighed whether to arrive at his next meeting late or drenched. He decided on the former and turned for the exit. As he left, he heard one of the GENT men telling the other, “that’s how you get our budget cut even more!” It was rather strange to be such a frightening creature nowadays.

By evening, Grant was feeling sick- as though he had a flu coming on. He spent a few days laying around before returning to work, feeling just as badly. He couldn’t afford more time off if he didn’t want to end up entirely buried by work. Shawn was mildly concerned when it was a few weeks in and the illness didn’t seem to be going away- and that Grant was intent on working through it- but all he could do was support Grant through it and give him the space he needed. Even in the beginning, it was extremely frustrating that his boyfriend was suffering and unable to do much of anything outside of work, but to an extent it was nothing Shawn wasn’t used to- Grant had had bouts of depression nearly as bad as this. As time went on, Shawn noticed some more disturbing changes.

It was about two weeks in that the voice emerged and the hallucinations began. Grant had been in his office when he’d heard a pained scream- seemingly from right outside of it. He rushed out, expecting to see an injured person or an emergency of some sort. Instead, he found only his secretary, perfectly calm and looking at him as though he was an alien. “Do you know where that came from?” Grant asked.

“Where what came from?” Oh, that judgmental stare.

“The scream? You heard the scream, right?”

“No.”

Grant cringed and closed the door to his office.

The headaches, the brain fog, the fatigue, and now the hallucinations, a voice said. It was a voice that sounded as real as the scream had, but it wasn’t one he’d heard before. Do you want to know what’s causing it? There was a pause, as though Grant would answer and let his secretary think even worse of him. You’re losing your mind. You know what they do with crazy people, right? An image of an electric chair flashed through Grant’s mind, followed by an image of locked insane asylum doors and tools used for a lobotomy. Just carry on. Try to act normal, and don’t let anyone know about this. I’ll be here when you need me. Grant sat back down at his desk, taking a look around the room as though he could find where the voice was coming from. Finding nothing, he returned to his paperwork.

A few weeks later, Grant decided to coax some answers from the voice. It was absurd- if it was right, and it probably was, the voice came from him, and couldn’t know anything he didn’t. But he had few options. His symptoms were becoming glaringly obvious. Shawn had noticed that he was spacing out during conversations, and his department was noticing that he couldn’t keep track of time and was making mathematical errors he never would have before. Shawn had even seen him react to hallucinations a couple times, and it frightened him. Grant knew he needed to figure this out before it hurt his professional life, or hurt his relationship any further.

It was a cold winter’s night. Grant returned home after work- thankfully Shawn wasn’t home yet- and went to his room to interrogate.

“Alright,” he said, facing the wall. “Tell me what I have. If there’s a way to fix it, I’m going to.”

Shawn had been unable to sleep that night, so he heard Grant’s voice. It didn’t bother him, though, until Grant started yelling. Shawn got up and went to investigate. The house was totally dark except for the light coming from Grant’s room. Shawn creaked open the door. Grant was facing a wall, shifting his weight as though he might spring on his invisible adversary if it proved necessary.

[scaryscarecrows]

Will Trade Soup for Intel

Potential Gotham Knights ‘verse. For those who did not see the trailer: Bruce is dead (pfft, suuuuure he is), Jim Gordon is dead (Jim, no!), the Court of Owls appears (this is gonna be bad), Batgirl and Robins 1-3 have guardianship of Gotham. For this piece: Penguin is also dead. Dove has his operation. And the flu. :p

***

Tim’s not sure where he thought Jason was going to take him. Honestly, because it’s Jason, he was sort of thinking, ‘seedy hole in the wall where retired hitmen go’. Or something. Or maybe an orphanage, or an under-the-bridge camp; the Alley Kids don’t throw bottles and needles at him, unlike the others. They demand rides.

(Yeah, it’s funny but also scary to see the Red Hood, known for his duffle bag of heads, giving a little girl a piggyback ride.)

This is not one of those places. This is some apartment building in midtown with a doorman and everything. And, y’know, it’s daytime, which...they don’t operate in the daytime that much unless they’re undercover, and they don’t appear to be. Jason told Tim to dress like a real boy and stick his domino on in the elevator, but he’s wearing what he always does; jeans, hoodie, heavy boots. And he’s carrying a brown bag that smells like soup. No helmet in sight, and Tim knows he won’t wear a domino now. They bug the scar*, he says.

“Where are we?”

“To see an old friend. I’m out of other ideas.”

“What, are they a conspiracy professor or something?”

“No.”

The doorman waves them through and they wait for an empty elevator. Jason presses the third-floor button and settles in, adjusting the bag in his arms. For all the crap they give...gave...Bruce about theatrics, Jason’s no better. He lives for building the suspense. Tim had nearly murdered him again for that stupid monk joke. Asshole. Ten minutes from his life, and for that? Humph.

A cotton face mask whaps him in the chest while he’s adjusting his domino and he frowns.

“What.”

“You’re fragile, and she’s got the flu, which is why we’re here in the daytime. I’m basically immune after my, um, upgrade points got cashed in, but you are a Victorian maiden who'll probably turn it into tuberculosis and die and I can’t deal with Dick after that.”

Huh.

…

Whatever. You lose one spleen…

He puts the mask on, too, making sure Jason sees his glower, just as the elevator dings to a halt.

Tim starts to suspect they’re not invited, exactly, when Jason shoves the bag at him and drops down to pick the lock. Though he does knock and call, “Don’t get up!”, so.

“There. Give me that before you spill something...hey, Miss Marquis! I brought soup!”

…

Jason couldn’t have just told him this, why?

There’s furious coughing in the other room, followed by movement, and a minute later Dove shuffles out, wrapped in a blanket and wearing what appear to be bunny slippers. She looks terrible.

“For the tenth time, I don’t care how immune you think you are, you’re going to get sick and I can take care of myself.”

“Haven’t gotten sick yet,” Jason says cheerfully. “‘Sides, it’s, like, partly a bribe.”

Dove doesn’t look convinced. Tim’s not convinced, either. Jason, when left to his own devices, can and will out-mother-hen Dick. He’s just usually scarier when he does it. More like Alfred.

Before any further argument can happen, Dove starts coughing again and winds up clutching the doorframe with one hand and holding the other up to keep Jason at bay.

“Thought you were gonna take Theraflu,” Jason says sulkily. Dove reaches up to pinch the bridge of her nose.

“I will take it if I need it, Hood.” Tim sympathizes. Theraflu tastes like sadness. At least Robitussin is nice. “I promise this isn’t my first flu, I am fine. ” This is not a battle she’ll win. Tim knows. Tim has tried and failed. Jason had loomed at him and told him, oh-so-nicely, that he would take the Theraflu or that it would breach his defenses. “What do you want.”

Jason holds up the bag.

“Fridge or bowl?”

“Fridge, please.”

“Tea?”

“If I say yes, will you settle down?”

“For now.”

She sighs and totters over to an armchair.

“Fine.”

“What kind.”

“I’ve got some sort of zinger tea in there, that would be very nice.”

Jason vanishes into the kitchen. Dove sinks into her chair, pulling her blanket tighter around her shoulders, and waves at the couch.

“Siddown, Robin.”

“Sorry we broke in,” he says, because Jason won’t. Dove just shakes her head.

“This isn’t the first time or the last time,” she says. “At least you used the door...if you need a drink or somethin’, help yourself.”

Jason comes back, steaming mug in his hands.

“I’ll get it,” he says. “Bird boy here shouldn’t touch the kitchen.”

Slander.

“Nightwing’s worse.”

“Still. Here y’go.”

“Thanks, honey.” Dove leans up to take it before shooing him back. “Now. Why are you here.”

Jason settles onto the couch next to Tim and leans forward, worrying at his lower lip.

“This is going to sound crazy.”

“Well, that’s interesting.”

“Do you know anything about the Court of Owls?”

Dove snorts, coughs, and takes a sip of her tea.

“What?”

“You know…beware the court of owls that watches all the time, ruling Gotham from a shadowed perch behind granite and lime. They watch you at your hearth, they watch you in your bed. Speak not a whispered word of them--”

“Or they’ll send the Talon for your head, I know the rhyme.” She takes another sip. “It’s a scary story to keep kids in line, you know that.”

“We thought so, but.” He shrugs. “”Had a run-in with...something...last night that, um. Looked a little dead. But not dead like me, dead like...I don’t know. It was like it wasn’t human anymore. Or ever. I don’t know.”

Well, that’s a surprise. Tim wonders if Jason just straight-up admitted what happened or if Dove got it out of him or from some other source.

“Croc’s not human, either, kid.”

“No. This thing...I didn’t...I broke its neck and it fucking twisted it back into place.”

Dove frowns.

“You’re sure?”

“Uh-huh. And before that I emptied literally twelve bullets into this thing and it didn’t even flinch. I’m telling you, something wasn’t right and it was wearing an owl mask.”

Tim nods.

“There have been four murders committed with daggers that have owl insignias on them,” he says. “We think these two things are related.”

“Owl daggers?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Can I see one?”

“I brought a picture. The daggers are police evidence.”

“Like you boys didn’t borrow one,” she says, but sits up when Jason comes over with the phone. “I’ve seen something like this before.”

Well, that was unexpected.

“When?”

“Years ago, now. Penguin had one that he got from who-knows-where. It went missing one night-we chalked it up to Catwoman and let it go-but we did have people offer to buy it a few times. Generous offers, too.”

“He wouldn’t sell?” Odd. Penguin loved money almost as much as his pet birds. “Can you remember who offered?”

“Rich men, you know the type. They like...oddities.”

Tim does know the type. During Dick’s stint as Batman, he’d stumbled upon an auction house that specialized in some nasty things, including a very particular crowbar.

(Jason, as far as Tim knows, has no idea about this.)

“Did he say anything about it?”

“No. He put it in his office, in a little case, and honestly, I sort of figured someone had tried to kill him with it. He was funny about things like that.”

That’s an understatement. Penguin had been very proud of the bottle in his eye, among other things.

Dove starts coughing again and ends up setting her tea on the end table. Jason’s halfway over there when the coughs turn to sputters and she manages to wheeze out a, “Fine. M’fine.”

“This is why you should take Theraflu.”

“Honey…”

“I can make--”

“Hon.” He shuts up. “I’m okay. It’s just the flu, give me another week and I’ll be back to normal.” She takes a shuddery breath and picks up her tea again. “I promise. Now. I don’t.” Another shuddery breath, but no coughing this time. “I don’t know anything else off the top of my head, but. Little fuzzy.” She tugs at her blanket until it’s closed around her neck, just under her chin. “If anything comes up, I’ll let you know-ow- shit --”

The coughs don’t stop this time and she winds up bent nearly double, arms curled up to, presumably, brace her ribs. Ouch. When they finally wane, she’s red-faced and wheezing and looking fairly well miserable. Tim’s just about to nudge Jason when she stands up, clutching her mug in white, shaky fingers, and says, “I am going back to bed. Lock up behind yourselves.”

“Can we do anything?”

“No, hon. But thanks. You boys.” A finger goes up and she sort of... hics ...but nothing happens. “You boys stay safe. Don’t do anything. Anything reckless.”

Reckless? Humph. They’re not reckless. Adventurous, is Tim’s preferred term. So one time he leapt off a building knowing his grappler wasn’t working. Dick caught him, like he knew he would. It was leap or be eaten, and being eaten was by far the uglier choice.

“Reckless? Us?” Jason mock-gasps. “Thanks. Soup’s in the fridge. Want me to make you a Thera--”

“ No. Thank you.”

THE END

*I’m debating on whether or not that scar is Joker-related (could be an aborted Glasgow?) OR Batarang-caused: maybe Bruce hit his face rather than his throat in this version of UtRH. Either way, ow.

[rachelkaser]

Stay Golden Supplement: Season One Recap

So here we are at the very end of the first season of Golden Girls, at least as far as Stay Golden Sundays go. Now’s a perfect time to go back over the season, collect some numbers, and give some awards to the better episodes.

Picture It...

I don’t think you need to hear from me that the show’s first season was a runaway success in spite of its early growing pains. The chemistry between the four actresses was immediately appealing to a large audience, and the writing only got better from the pilot onwards. It had a few duds here and there, and it would be a while before the writers would perfect the formula of making sure every Girl got the attention they deserve. But still, Golden Girls managed to strike gold.

So with that in mind, let’s do a quick recap of the season’s stats and its highs and lows. Keep in mind that we’re going to go with my SGS slices when I talk about scores, and I’m not counting the pilot only because I never gave it an official slice score. I waffled over whether to call the awards “Best/Worst” vs “Favorite/Least Favorite,” but ultimately went with the former, because it sounds more definitive. Keep in mind my judgement is based on my opinion.

Slice Changes

I want to add a record here of the episode ratings that I went back and changed. Sometimes I have a bad week (or an unusually cheerful one) and I give an episode a rating that, looking back, I don’t agree with. The way I can usually tell is when my analysis section doesn’t match up with the final rating. I also think at first I was afraid of giving the same rating over and over again, but that reservation disappeared with time.

The Transplant: I bumped this down from a four-slice episode to a three-slice. Three-slice episodes to me are solid, have good jokes and stories, but are otherwise unremarkable. Upon rewatching this episode again, I think this episode’s B-plot being so… nothing keeps it from really being great.

The Competition: I moved this one from a three-slice to a four-slice. I’m not sure why I was so harsh on this episode. I said in the text that it’s not great, but I have literally always thought this episode was one of the better early ones and I’ll always watch it when it comes up in the rotation. I also love that it’s one of the first where Sophia plays a prominent role.

The Numbers

5-Slice Episodes: 3 4-Slice Episodes: 7 3-Slice Episodes: 12 2-Slice Episodes: 2

I will say, I’m probably hampered by the fact that I’m so unwilling to give episodes a 1-slice rating. Even the two “bad” episodes on this list have good jokes: “The Truth Will Out” gave us the Maple Syrup Brown Sugar Honey Molasses Rice Krispies Log.

Best Episode: “The Flu”

This is an episode I will always watch when it comes up in the rotation, either on TV or when I’m watching Hulu. It’s relatable (who hasn’t been sick, miserable, and cranky at least once), it’s hilariously funny, and it has a sweet core message about friendship being strong enough to survive adversity.

Worst Episode: “The Truth Will Out”

Rose’s daughter Kirsten being so unpleasant, and also the episode’s backstory being so confusing really dragged this one down. I hate watching it especially when Rose gets so upset and defensive in the face of her daughter’s anger. The idea of Rose having to conceal Charlie simply being a normal, not particularly successful businessman from her children also just seems . . . odd to me.

Best Guest Performance: Polly Holliday in “Blind Ambitions”

While the Girls get the lion’s share of characterization on any given episode, sometimes a one-off character gets great writing, or a guest actor really sinks their teeth into a role.

Rose’s blind sister Lily gets a whole character arc in a single episode, as she goes from being blithe about her condition, to being angry, to being dependent on Rose for care, to being self-sufficient. Polly Holliday manages to hold her own alongside all the other Girls, and portrays the complicated emotions that come with the disability very well.

Worst Boyfriend of the Season: Richard

I love the Girls, but they date some real winners on this show. Just for fun, I’ll list the man I think was the most awful this season.

Blanche’s rich beau from “Second Motherhood” is treated like a prize by all the Girls, but when you think about it, he’s kind of a tool. He’s so involved in his business he barely sees his two grade school-aged kids, and the minute he thinks Blanche is on the hook, he dumps all his childrearing responsibilities on her. Blanche even ends it with him on a hopeful note, when I can just tell he’s going to marry some other dupe the minute one crosses his path -- or, even worse, a mercenary.

Special Season Award: Most Balanced Episode

I have no idea if I’ll make an award like this every time I do one of these recaps. But I figured I might as well try it out, and if I can’t come up with anything else at the end of next season, I just won’t put a special award in.

“That Was No Lady.” This is the episode that made me realize balance could even be an issue on this show... ironically, because it’s perfectly balanced. Rose and Blanche get equal screen time in the B-plot, Dorothy takes the A-plot, and Sophia runs tertiary support for both which gives her equal screen time. I’m not saying the balanced episodes are always great, but Golden Girls works best when it takes advantage of the talents of all four actresses.

My favorite joke of the season

I know it’s a late one, but Sophia bursting into the kitchen with a knife to scare her roommates and then laughing her head off will never fail to make me smile and laugh. There’s a reason this made it into the title song reel.

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Ghosts from the rainforest

Captain James Conrad x Reader

Summary: A simple rescue mission will bring him back to a place full of nightmares, and maybe this time he could find redemption. Situated in 1975, 2 years after the events of Skull Island.

Warnings: Violence, blood, wounds, mentions of war, cursing, implied smut, smoking, angst.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

I finally manage to write the end to this tiny fic, I hope you like it, and I'm going to start on my ideas for a Jonathan Pine adventure, but I haven't decide yet.

Chapter 7: Fever [Final]

The helicopter was already on motion, and the rescue crew that Brooks had sent for you were charging everything for the trip. The guys were excited to finally going back home, the Celebes Sea was ahead of you in the military base you were staying, and waiting in the Pacific the majestic USS Constellation  (CV-64) waiting to take all of you home.

Home? A country that had make more damage and taken everything from you, your family, and had force you to live away to mend some of the atrocities they had committed in the name of freedom.

"Not looking so charming today are we?" You said to him once he walked in your room to pick up your bags, you have finally stop the hostilities after he had offered you his shoulder to cry while you mourned Shukri on his funeral and after all the physical torture he had endured so you could safely leave Borneo.

He had been clear about letting you stay if that was what you wanted, and even when the rest of the crew asume you were coming back to USA, he knew you would have to say goodbye sooner or later, so instead of telling him all the things your heart was keeping from him you kept teasing him and pretending the chopper was not waiting for him.

"I have a minor headache love, but it's okay, are you ready to say goodbye?" He said and you noted how his temple had a few wrinkles, he was trying to smile over the pain in his head "It's a shame you don't come with us, I have a lot of things I wanted to show you" he grabbed your hand and all your alarms started to scream.

"Conrad are you okay?" Those words were all you have hoped for, however the radiant heat from his skin told you he was not exactly fine. "Dear God you are burning up" You said touching his head and looking desperately for a thermometer in your belongings.

"I like you too doctor, but why don't we wait until we get to the ship, we can share a bunk bed" He was definitely not himself.

"103° damn it Conrad!" You said, and for some oddly reason remember the night he told you about Randa and how much he complained about mosquitoes while he was dressing "Look at me, I'm not kidding, did you take Chloroquine before we leave Malaysia? I told you guys you had to..."

He nodded negative, and before he could speak he simply throw up in the nearest trash bin, making you suspect of the worst, specially since all the medicine was now gone and the only viable solution now was the aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific waiting for you.

"Also you have perfect legs you know that? I could spend my life sleeping on them." He kept saying things like that while you helped him to the heliport "Come here princess your prince charming needs your love" he said trying to kiss you.

"Later dear, preferably when you're not dying or smelling like vomit" you tried to stop him.

"Well you didn't mind me covered in dirt and sweat" He tried again but he stopped to scream "Reg! I love you man, you are like a son to me" and also tried to kiss the boy on the forehead.

"What happened to the Captain?" Slivko asked concerned once you help him to board the chopper while carrying his luggage and your medical bag.

"I have no idea, but I'm afraid it might be Malaria" you said bluntly and all of them looked concerned at you, while he vomited again "Do you have medical equipment here?" You asked the pilot and he only raised his thumb while you make sure he was steady on the helicopter floor, and almost didn't feel the machine take off while you tried to put an IV on his arm.

After one hour that felt like ten you could no longer see the island, only the immensity of the Pacific, and growing in the horizon the USS Constellation, even when you despised war and everything it represented the enormous carrier was enough to let you speechless, specially when a team of nurses and a doctor was already with a stretcher waiting for him.

"It's going to be ok James" you told him holding his hand while the experts rushed him inside.

"You really like men to die quite literally for you right?" He tried to joke, fighting the impulse of vomiting again, "Hey it's okay, I have to take care of you remember?" He smiled and you hold his hand trying to not get on the way of the medical staff, but he was too weak and fall asleep.

After they had stabilized his temperature, and take samples of his blood to determine the pathogen they let you in, the beds inside the medical bay of the ship were oddly spacious, and you could be sited next to him without any other person listening.

"Y/N?" He asked opening his beautiful eyes, "Hey it's okay love, I'm feeling better" He said and tried to reach for the glass of water on the table.

"Let me" You said and put it closer to him, "I know, once they identify the plasmodium they will know what is the best treatment for you, they take test and interrogate all of us, don't tell him I told you but Reles almost passed out when he saw the needle " He attempt to laugh but was still weak so he only smiled.

"Well is rewarding seen you on my dead bed, I'm quite honored, tears look oddly beautiful on you" He said and a small smile form in your lips.

"And you are still delirious" You said looking for a piece of cloth, and cold water from the sink to put on his head. "Here, try to rest, I'll come see you later" you told him but before your hand could leave his head he hold you still "What?"

"I might be dying, so you owe me at least listening me like adults" He said forcing you to stay next to him.

"You are not dying" you said trying to sound like it didn't matter and failing miserably "you are not, but fine. Let's talk" you concede.

"I'm sorry" he started contrary to what you had expected. "I had no idea how you looked before we met, and i was under no circumstances trying to seduce you to lure you back to America" you blush and regret your decision to stay by his side.

"I'm sorry too" You responded after a while "You have done so much helping me, even when half of the trouble I caused was preventable if I haven't trusted in the wrong people." You said and he hold your hand softly, he didn't want to hear about that, and you knew it so you took all the courage you have to continue. "And I'm sorry I over reacted, I am so used to people coming to me with second intentions that I just pushed you away to avoid getting hurt, and I just end up making other people hurt you"

"I'm sorry I make you come to the ship, I knew you wanted to stay" he said sincerely.

"It's okay, I have to make sure you stay alive, you know for the boys, maybe working at Monarch with you and Brooks won't be so bad"

"Well you can always run away from us in Hawaii, or maybe... we could run away together" He gave you a pleading look, and for moment you could imagine that life, keep running away, by his side, the soldier that never came home, and the idealist doctor, and keep leaving ghosts in every island, trying to find happiness apart from the world, but together. He kissed you, but this time it wasn't a lusty hunger kiss, nor passionate and angry like before, it was reassuring and you knew no matter what your answer was, he was on your side, for the first time you had someone on your side "So what do you say?"

But you couldn't answer because out of nowhere your stomach make you nauseous and you rush to the toilet to empty its content.

"Are you okay dear?" He screamed from the bed "I'm trying bloody hard to not take this as criticism"

"I'm okay, but I'm going to check your tests and start taking the pills before I end up confessing my sins on the fever like you" you said and walked out of the bathroom to saw him "We can talk later" you assure him.

You marched inside the medical office and started to look in the cabinets, when the young doctor that had received Conrad walked in.

"I'm sorry, I start feeling the symptoms and I thought it would be better if I start on the chloroquine before it gets worse" you excuse yourself.

"That would be great, if any of you had Malaria" he said offering you a seat that you take since he speak with a Texan accent and an authoritarian voice that made up from his young face "But we test all of you and what our SAS friend has is more likely a stomach flu from some bad shrimp, I was just on my way to tell him." He said and you sigh in relief, but also concerned about your own symptoms

"Oh that's great, but I start barfing too, and I didn't had the shrimp last night" you said and he took out a small file with your name that the nurses had put together earlier.

"Well it may be motion sickness, we are in a boat after all, or maybe... you told the nurse you didn't remember when was your last period?" He said looking the file.

"Well we have been in the jungle almost a month so I wasn't exactly counting" you tried to joke.

"The change of environment can trigger the vomit, or if you had sex in the past three weeks you might be pregnant" He smiled and all the weight of the world fall into your shoulders instantly. "In any case you should rest and let alone my medical cabinets, go with nurse Matthews she will give you some vitamins" he said but you were not longer listening.

No, it couldn't be that, right? You tried to convince your mind, but deep down you knew it was true, what would he think? He was a soldier, a man of the field, not a father, and you were obviously not a mother, what will happen now? Now that he wanted to run away in the world next to you, a baby had a place on that plan?.

Two days later Conrad was out of the medical bay and trying to approach you, offering you a fresh start from the afternoon you pause all those weeks ago in Malaysia.

But the stolen kisses on the hallways, and his nightly incursions on your cabin only made it harder for you to find a way to come clean about your news, even when the idea had already sink in your mind, because it was a baby, and it was his baby, how could you not be happy and grateful? Yet you haven't say anything to him.

Four days later he had spend the whole day walking on the deck with you, like if the planes and choppers were an appropriate sighting for a date.

"We'll be in Hawaii soon" He started "If you want to go out for a walk in the morning and get lost in the jungle we have to star planning now" he said and you were looking at the ocean trying to make up your mind.

"Maybe... I was wondering about the work you do at Monarch, maybe I will give it a chance" you start not sure how the whole we are having a baby situation will fit in your speech "I mean if you want to travel the world it might help to have a paying job for a while" you were nervously touching your hands.

"Of course, also when the baby comes I would like to have a proper house for him to be... or she, I don't care you know? as long as they're healthy" he said and you nodded yes.

"Yeah of course... what??" You look at him and he had the most radiant smile on his face, and he was clearly holding his laugh and apparently tears, of joy? "How do you know?

"Well nurse Matthews saw us kissing and then she complained about how Children this days keep having children out of wedlock" he said and you hide your face on your hands.

"I was really going to tell you... for real is just..." but you didn't have the words in you, and the tears were running on your face

"I know, it's fine, I mean is a little soon but if I'm honest I'm tired of running, and after all we've been trough I couldn't imagine a single person to share this experience with" He said cleaning the tears from your face.

"You sure?" You asked again, needing to hear it from his mouth.

"I'm sure, I fall in love with you when I saw you scaring local vendors in Malaysia and then fighting guerilla liders in Borneo, I even loved you when you vomit after kissing me for real, I'm completely taken by you Y/N"

"I fall in love with you too James" you said, and his expression got serious for a moment. "What?"

"Nothing, is just that I'm going to miss Prince Charming" he said giving you again the disarming smile that had started all this adventure.

The end

@damalseer

@kinghiddlestonanddixon (I hope you like the end)

[quickspinner]

MLHolidays2k19 - 19. Naughty and Nice

A continuation of 18. Elves

Please do not kill me, y’all, there will be a part 3, I promise.

Note: Part 3 is here!

Luka honestly didn’t expect her to come. Not many girls would come even to a mall bar like this dressed like one of Santa’s elves. Not to mention it was entirely possible that she thought he was a creep. He was kind of hitting on her while she was working, against his own policy. She was just so cute and sweet, and if he wasn’t totally misreading her, she was maybe a little bit into him too, and he couldn’t stomach the idea of missing out completely, so he gave her the most low-pressure invitation he could think of. Luka tried not to think about it after that.

It didn’t go very well. Outwardly he kept his cool, but internally he diverted his thoughts into a list of reasons she wouldn’t come and why he shouldn’t be disappointed. She’d doubtless be tired after handling kids and parents all day. And it was a little weird for a grown woman to be dressing up as an elf. Although it was pretty selfless of her to do it for charity, and year after year, too, it was a kind—wait, no. She probably thought he was a freak anyway, flirting with her after she cheered up his niece, like one of those pathetic guys who thought walking a puppy would help him meet girls. Man, he really hoped she didn’t think that, she was so cute and she seemed so nice and—damn it, Couffaine. 

Luka scanned the place every time he walked through as they were setting up. It wasn’t the type of venue he normally played, but the act that had originally been booked for tonight had bailed at the last minute, and the bartender had convinced the manager to let Luka’s band play, though their sound was a bit heavy for the kind of crowd that frequented this place. The stage was smaller, the sound system less powerful, and the lighting quite a bit brighter than what they were used to, but a gig was a gig. Luka had visited while another band was playing to get the feel of the place, and he’d done his best to tailor their set list to make the most of it.

He was just about to go on when he spotted her, leaning against the bar and breathing hard, like she had run to get here in time. Luka swerved away, ignoring his bandmates’ hissed demands for him to come back. “Hey,” he said, touching her elbow to get her attention. She turned toward him and her mouth dropped open a little as she looked him over. That was a nice ego boost, and Luka grinned. “Glad you could make it. I’ve gotta go on, but I’ll come find you after, okay? Enjoy the show.” 

He turned to go and then changed his mind.“Hey, Vic,” Luka called, leaning over the bar. “Do me a favor, let Santa’s Helper here order a drink on my tab?”

Victor gave him a wave and Luka headed back to his aggravated bandmates with a shit-eating grin and an extra bounce in his step.

Luka felt good about the performance; the audience seemed into it, the sound quality was acceptable, and it looked like the balance was okay. The lights were hotter than he liked, but that was a minor difficulty, and he was prepared for it. 

Luka ditched his bandmates as soon as he could when the show was over, doing the bare minimum to help with the breakdown before slipping away (the others grumbled, but every one of them had been in this situation before, so they just rolled their eyes as they took his spare keys to the van). Luka stopped in the men’s room to rinse off the worst of the sweat and change to a clean shirt, and then he slipped out in search of the cute elf waiting for him. At least, he hoped she waited for him. He paused at the end of the bar when he didn’t see her right away. He jumped when Victor spoke right at his elbow.

“Nice performance.” Victor slid a shot across the bar to him. “I think you’re going to need this.” 

Luka looked at him, confused, and Victor tipped his head to indicate a seat a few feet farther down the bar. Luka turned to look where he indicated, and his jaw dropped. 

That...was not the elf he expected. Marinette had removed her false ears and name tag of course, but also the belled collar that had lain over her shoulders, her white, long-sleeved undershirt, and the scalloped green overskirt with the bells on it, leaving her in just the red sleeveless dress with its candy cane striped belt. Her striped stockings and belled shoes were also gone, replaced with a simple pair of flats. Her arms were bare, her dress was no longer buttoned up tight to her throat, and her very nice legs were crossed as she perched on the bar stool. She’d taken her hair out of the pigtails and it hung loose around her shoulders. Marinette looked up and smiled a little nervously as someone leaned over to talk to her, and he could see she’d redone her makeup as well, making the most of her stunning blue eyes. 

Luka groped for the shot still on the bar without looking away. Victor laughed and shoved it into his hand. Luka tossed it back, barely registering the burn. “Thanks, Vic,” he managed, before he took a deep breath, and went to greet his cute but suddenly not so innocent little elf. 

“Hey,” he said, looking her over. “Wow. I thought you were cute before but I gotta say, I’m impressed.” 

“Oh,” Marinette blushed. “I didn’t really do much, I just wanted to, you know,” she waved a hand vaguely. “Blend in a little better.”

“Well,” Luka chuckled, looking away before he embarrassed himself staring at her legs, “If that was your plan, then I’m afraid it failed miserably, because you—“ He met her eyes again. “Definitely stand out.”

She blushed harder, but picked up her drink with a flirty little toss of her hair and sniffed, “I’ll bet you say that to all the elves.”

Luka laughed. “Oh my God, you’re so cute,” he chuckled. “Listen, I’m starved, how about we grab a table and get some food? Are you hungry? On me, for taking such good care of Angie. Rose loved the pictures, by the way.”

“Oh, good. Is she feeling any better?”

The question surprised him a little. “Yeah, I think they’re getting towards the end finally. Rose is upright, at least, but Jules is still spending most of her day face down praying to die.” He smiled at her. “Thanks for asking, most people wouldn’t even remember.”

“It’s good that Angie didn’t get sick,” Marinette observed, taking his offered hand and letting him help her down from the bar stool. 

“Oh she did,” Luka chuckled. “She’s the one who gave it to her moms. Now she’s all better and wanting to play while they’d rather die than move from the couch. Needless to say I’ve been doing a lot of babysitting the last week or so. I had it a few months ago so they figured I was safe. I promise, I’ve been keeping her clean and sanitized so she can’t pass it along.”

Marinette wrinkled her nose. “Alya made me get a flu shot before we volunteered.”

“That was probably smart.”

A quick word with the hostess got them a table in the restaurant part of the bar, a small circular booth in the corner that was actually probably as private as the place could offer. That was nice. “Are you hungry?” he asked, passing her a menu.

“So hungry,” she sighed, leaning back against the back of the booth. 

“You look tired,” Luka said sympathetically. “Sounded like you were in for a long day when we talked before.” 

“Yeah,” she turned her face toward him and smiled, and his heart stuttered at the cute way her hair bunched up behind her when she shifted her head. “It was a good day, though, and I’m not sorry I stayed. It took us longer to pack up than I expected and I almost didn’t make it. You guys did great up there, I really enjoyed the show.” 

“Good,” Luka said, trying to contain himself as he looked over the menu. “I’m glad we made it worth your time to come. This isn’t exactly the type of place we usually play, though, so we toned everything down a bit tonight. I’d like to have you come see us play for real sometime.” He glanced at her and thought he saw a hint of pink in her cheeks, though she was studying her menu as intently as he. 

“I’d like that,” she said, and then darted a glance up at him. They smiled at each other and went back to the menu. 

They chatted their way all through dinner, with a generous mixture of flirting whenever one of them could get up the nerve. She talked about her work as a junior designer and her volunteer work with the hospital, and he talked about his family and the musicians he worked with. 

Marinette was pretty and she was sweet and she was smart as a whip, and Luka was somewhere between smitten and enamored by the time they ordered dessert. She asked to try his and he ended up sliding close so they could share both. 

Then she looked up at him, giggling at something he’d said, and there was a smear of chocolate on her lip that did him in entirely. There was no sign of his usual self-control as Luka moved toward her, catching her face in his hand and turning it up so he could catch her chocolate smeared lip between his, tongue eagerly running across it to sweep the sweet syrup into his own mouth. Then he moved just enough to kiss her more fully, and just as his brain was catching up enough to realize just how forward he’d been, she kissed him back and he lost his mind again, one arm going around her waist to pull her closer, angling to bring her in deeper, and her hands slid up his arms to grip his shoulders, and they were well on their way to a full-blown make out when the sudden slap of the folder containing their check on the table made them both jump. The server gave them a dirty look as he walked away. The message was clear. Stop camping my table and get a room.

“Oh,” Marinette gasped, and turned to grope for her oversized purse. It jingled when she grabbed it and Luka bit back a laugh. 

“I’ve got it,” Luka said, flashing her a smile as he picked up the folder. “I told you it was on me.”

“Wow, it’s really late,” Marinette said, looking at her phone. “I guess we were talking for kind of a long time.” She smiled at him regretfully. “I should head home.” 

“Let me grab my guitar, I’ll walk you to the metro station,” Luka said, sliding out of the booth and offering her a hand. He wanted to offer her a ride, but intense chemistry or not, he didn’t think she’d be comfortable getting in a car alone with him at night. Especially since he drove what Juleka lovingly referred to as a “kidnapper van” to accommodate the band’s equipment.

“You don’t have to do that,” Marinette said as she slid out of the booth. Luka realized he was staring and quickly diverted his eyes from her legs, though he was pretty sure she’d caught him from the way she tugged her skirt down.

“I want to,” he smiled, squeezing her hand lightly before letting go. “I’ll meet you right outside? I’m already packed up, I just have to grab my things.”

Luka booked it as quick as he could to the back. He put on his coat, shouldering the guitar case and his bag, barely remembering to snatch up his hoodie where it was draped over a chair before he left. He cut through the dwindling crowd to the entrance, winking in response to the thumbs up Victor gave him as he passed.

Marinette was standing just inside the door, looking out of the windows and chewing her thumbnail. 

“Don’t you have a coat?” Luka asked, frowning. Marinette jumped nearly out of her skin and whirled. 

“Oh. Oh, sorry. Um, no, actually, I think I left it in the locker at the North Pole and they’ll be locked up by now,” she sighed, shoulders slumping. “It’s fine, I’ll just grab it in the morning.” 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you,” Luka said, draping his hoodie over her shoulders. “Here, you’ll freeze like that. It’s not much, but it’s better than nothing.”

“Thank you,” Marinette smiled, slipping her arms in the sleeves and zipping it up. Luka turned to open the door for her, mostly to hide the grin on his face at the way his hoodie swallowed her. 

Marinette seemed jumpy as they walked, which wasn’t surprising since it was pretty cold outside and the hoodie really wasn’t much. She flat refused to take his heavier coat. Her cheeks were pink from the wind, and he couldn’t get a good look at her face in the streetlights. It was too cold for chitchat, and at their quick pace, it didn’t take long for them to reach their destination.

“Well, here we are,” Luka said, stopping to turn toward her as they reached the metro entrance. 

“Thanks for walking me,” Marinette smiled, pushing her hair back as the wind tried to blow it in her face. “It was really nice meeting you.” 

“I’d really like to see you again,” Luka said, reaching tentatively to take her hand loosely. “I know it’s kind of crazy right now with the holidays, but could I get your number, and maybe we can see about finding some time to get together?” 

“Oh...” Marinette bit her lip, and the deer in the headlights look she gave him stopped his heart. Her next words broke it. “I just—I mean, I don’t, uh…I mean we just met, and—” 

“Okay,” he smiled, letting her fingers slide out of his. “Then I guess, thanks for a great night, Marinette. I had fun.” He hesitated, and couldn’t help adding hopefully, “I’m taking Angie to Place des Vosges tomorrow to play. We’ll probably get there around ten. If you change your mind, that’s where I’ll be.” 

“Um, your jacket—” Marinette began, reaching for the zipper of the hoodie, but Luka raised his hand.

“Keep it, I’ve had it forever, it’s no big deal. Goodnight, Marinette.” Luka turned quickly, trying to keep his exit slow enough that he didn’t look like a dog fleeing with his tail between his legs. It wasn’t like he’d never been rejected before, but this one stung. 

It stung a lot.

He walked to his van, stowed his guitar mechanically, and dropped his head on his folded arms. “Idiot,” he muttered. “Damn it.” He sighed, sat up, and started the van.

TO BE CONTINUED please don’t kill me THINK OF THE FICS I CAN’T WRITE IF I DIE

Part 3 is up!

[tsukidotcom]

Haikyuu HC to COVID-19 (Karasuno edition)

This is horrible 💀 im just so bored so I made whatever this mess is KFJSJDMSK enjoy

Hinata Shouyou

huh? isn’t it just the flu?

“No, hinata. People have died from it-“

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH-

goes bananas

whenever someone sneezes or coughs, his soul leaves his body as he runs away to sanitize/wash his hands for a miserably long time.

eats an expired can of peaches thinking it’s his last resort

lowkey happy school is closed because homework sucks

but also highkey hates it because now all volleyball tournaments are closed

then gets all angry when he realizes he’d have to do online school???!!?? like wtf he got jipped.

thinks they could still do volleyball if they did online calls cus if the school can do it,, then vOLLEYBALL CAN

will probably miss half of the class calls from oversleeping/forgetting anyway.

sheepishly ask yamaguchi, yachi or tsukishima for help on assignments/notes. (he will NEVA ask kageyama. he’s always in competition with him here!)

still practices volleyball 24/7 in his backyard or room (maybe even with his baby sister??)

He’s really good at practicing all by himself from practicing all alone in middle school—

but will probably go crazy being alone all the time with his family. he just wants to play volleyball with the team again.

looks up “what to do when you’re bored” or “what to do at home while in quarantine” on youtube

Kageyama Tobio

probably says he’s immune to the corona because he’s just better than everyone else

doesn’t really think it’s real until school shut down because of it

When he sees that corona is airborne he wont know what that means so he’d probably think it’s produced by air itself?? which makes him think air is trying to kill the human race?? and will be so confused as to why it decided to pop up now???

DESPISES online school. He had enough trouble understanding it from the gecko, so now he has to learn it basically all by hiMSELF?!?

And no way is he just gona email the teacher for help. If he does it’s gonna be only once in his lifetime. Anymore than that he thinks he’s doin too much. He doesn’t want his teachers thinking he’s dumb 😭

he says literally nothing during the calls he just tries to pay attention? and fails because he’s on a computer. in his room. alone. he’s bound to daze off or stare at a pen for 5 minutes.

Obvi still practices volleyball. Very much misses it. At least Hinata had his sibling to practice with him. tobio is a lone wolf in his household.

When his mom goes out to get groceries he gives her one of those doctor masks so she doesn’t catch corona.

Few moments later through the internet he realizes that corona is smaller than air molecules so if you can breathe through something you could still get it so he struggles for an hour thinking he just killed his mother

When his mom is back he keeps his distance in case she’s carrying the plague

omg did she just cough or am i imagining things no she definitely coughed she has corona oh oh god

In reality she was just clearing her throat.

is lowkey worrying about everyone and how they are 🥺 (yes, maybe even hinata).

thinks he’s science smart by calling it covid-19 than corona.

Asahi Azumane

He just worries about everyones health

like he just imagines the worst case scenario’s and starts to get really worried if people got it. Always checks on everyone and asks if they’re feeling any symptoms of corona ❤️

He’s either not gonna get it or he gets it and dies there’s no inbetween

but he’s jesus himself so theres no way he nor anyone in his bloodline can get it

is very happy to know that dogs can’t get it.

Takes online school seriously and tries his best

And is honestly so sad school just ended??? even if it’s temporary, he could be learning, playing volleyball, and going about his day instead of staying in a cage. he’s a third year so—how would graduation even go..?

always is up to date on the news !! and notifies everyone if anything important is added/changed.

Always tells everyone to stay safe! Whether through text or before ending a call.

only buys a lot of toilet paper from the fear of there being no toilet paper in stock since evERYONE IS BUYING IT-

Starts to try new hobbies that he put off for the longest time cus quarentine is rlly getting to him.

Is all out a family guy so he doesn’t mind the extra time with his family.

Nishinoya Yu

OAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOA

420 blazin’

thinks going outside means you’re instantly gonna die from corona attacking your white blood cells (????)

but also probably doesnt care as he goes outside like everyday to run around and get rid of energy (and to practice volleyball, of course).

also why is it called white blood cells when blood is red ☠️ smh

Buys 101611018320129 bags of chips because that’s his comfort food

yay more gaming time!!!

Noya🐒: Tanaka do u wana play minecraft 2getr latr?

Tanaka🍌: HELL YEAH!!

doesn’t shower for three days straight because screw personal hygiene!! No more school!!! Can do whatever he wanted!! It’s basically summer!!!

until he’s forced to do online school.

Is def the class clown. Probably somehow kicks the teacher out of the call through a little bit of hacking.

“alright guys so i’ll be you’re substitute teacher for the day-“

tbh acts the same as he would in school. maybe a little more rebellious because, i mean, what is the teacher gonna do? send him to DETENTION? call his mOMMY?

Calls/spams literally everyone in his contacts because he’s so bored and lonely. Answer him!! Y’all will be on facetime for hours!!

He’s fun to facetime.

Will call you a loser if you don’t have an apple iPhone because then he can’t facetime you and facetiming is one of his favorite things to do to pass time (besides gaming)

HE A TRUE GAMER

Okay but he lowkey still tries at school for the sake of his grades and his future ;-; maybe calls asahi or sugawara for help??

always looks up his homework on the internet to see if he can get an answer key or something (he did that anyway even before corona but)

will do one subject for 3 hours thinking he’s finally done with everythinf till he realizes he has like 4 other subjects and needs to do those too.

Sending memes all the time

Tsukishima Kei

oh, what about corona again?

honestly could give NO fucks??. like ABSOLUTELY ZERO. nonxistent.

doesn’t even remember it’s still happening half the time.

is surprisingly very knowledgeable about corona.

he’s just smart and sciency¿ so he understands the ins and outs of corona like how it works and how its spread.

so if you tRULY want any update or background info on the corona virius, ask Tsukishima.

bitch don’t touch me you have rabies.

doesn’t care that he’s obligated to stay at home because he would have stayed either way. he very much likes being alone.

might go a little crazy cooped up in his room so he’ll hang with his brother/family or go outside before he says ‘okay that’s enough’ and goes back to his room.

isolation? oh okay *puts on headphones*

he rlly gonna be rocking it out in his room cus he can listen to music all day any day

developes a really bad sleep schedule since he had no way to get rid of the energy he got rid of at school.

still a huge tease so he says everyone has the corona virius.

is never online on social media which means he’s never up to date with his frIENDS. Doesn’t have a clue what those dipshits are doing and could care less (besides yamaguchi,, they probably facetime or call thru skype or something).

I bet the whole volleyball squad has a groupchat and honestly he puts all notifs on mute cus his phone keep goin DING DING DING DI DING ID DID IDKNG DING DIG

Brother: Omg why are you getting so many text messages?

Tsukki: Shut up

if he is online on the gc and he texts it would be simple replies like “Hi” “Okay.” “No.” “Goodbye.” and then he’s gone for another week

every first year is begging on their knees for tsukishima to give the answers or help them out and he obviously says: go do the hw yourselves idiots

besides yamaguchi!!!! again!! cus theyre gay for each other

maybe practices once in awhile with his brother or alone in his backyard but he doesn’t care

Tanaka Ryuunosuke

buys 101817 pounds of toilet paper because everyone else is? but not because of the same reason as asahi. he thinks toilet paper is the cure to corona.

GO STUPID AAAAAAAAA GO CRAZY AAAAAAAAAAA-

probably has a part time job at a grocery store so he still has to go to work 😭 i dont even know how he could have a job in the first place he’s probably always late-

still gamin with noya of course

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY ROOM IM PLAYING MINECRAFTT

also buys like all the junk food thats in stock. and since he works at the grocery store he gets a ton of coupons and deals.

texts Kiyoko everyday goodmorning ❤️❤️❤️ and goodnight 😘😘 texts just to be left on read.

“i love it when she ignores me !!!”

scrolls through tiktoks for 1000 hours to pass time

School Is For Losers!!

similar to noya, he thought it was basicaly summer until he realized they were gonna be doing online school. literally had a fit and said he didnt wanna do jack squAt

Laughs so hard when nishinoya somehow kicks the teacher out of the call he’s like laughing so loud and hard he starts crying

all of the sudden has a better view on school

gets excited when he sees nishinoya on the call

makes funny and ugly ass faces when the teacher isn’t looking. everyone laughs and the teacher’s like 🤨

probably uses the green screen effect so he can change hus background (somehow) and accidentally misclicks a file so a girl wit a bikini becomes his background for .5 seconds before changing it to a cursed meme:

doesn’t get half the shit the teacher is talking about

but it’s okay because the half he doesn’t get is the other half noya gets

and the half noya doesnt get is the orher half tanaka gets

they’re two peas in a pod 🥰

until they try explaining it to each other and suddenly get confused?? mental malfunction ¿?

yeah im SMART!!!

s -

m -

a -

r - penis

t -

Daichi Sawamura

quite calm about the whole coronavirus

like he knows it is serious and understands how it is spread but he’s still calm about it??

tells everyone to sanitize and wash hands on a regular. and social distancing!!

honestly still wakes up like he does on normal school days and does all his academics just fine.

he even does gym activities (besides volleyball) for 30 minutes to an hour!!!! he be running on that treadmil! getting stronk!

does each subject on his own for 20-40 min each day. he’s really good at self discipline

makes sure sugawara and asahi are up to date on school work and will gladly help.

sadly can’t help the first years (and probably second years) because that info is deep in his brain and basically forgot how to do it after a year or two of not using it.

VERY VERY VERY sad that volleyball nationals are cut off. this is his last year and for it to be??? gone??? just because of some flu?!?! hates it.

he wishes school to go back and still has hope that school will go back to normal in a couple of weeks (even though it’s a slim chance).

asks the teacher questions whenever he has questions. He’s also vv considerate so he’ll ask questions he knows the answer to but asks them for anyone who’s confused ab it/wants to ask but is too shy. (literally i lov daichi sm)

Eats a healthy amount of everything

asks asahi for any updates on corona even though he’s quite up to date himself. he just wanna make sure he didn’t miss anything.

also doesn’t mind being around his family. he’ll do more chores around the house to help his parents out :> he’s literally perfect wtf

def does worry about everyone in the volleyball gc and anyone else he has contact with. Will also email classmates and ask if they’re doing all right. Even away from volleyball he’s a team player ☺️✌️

Is happy for the rest of the day when asahi tells him dogs can’t get corona.

Yamaguchi Tadashi

oaoaiquqhdkoaiaagadjsiwi?

doesn’t know what to believe anymore

keeps in touch with everyone!! always online 24/7 on social media, vball gc, you name it.

Literally everyone is acting so normal why are people so calm am i the only one worrying about this and the worlds future like this year has been really bad so far for not just me but the whole nation actually the entire world honestly like war almost broke out in january and now this corona stuff is really buttering my crissont the wrong way-

Even though tsukishima literally gives No Fucks, yamaguchi is the complete opposite.

like tsukki and yamaguchi call on skype and eVERY TIME yamaguchi starts with ‘how have you been? do you feel sick at all? have you drank enough water today?’ and so on

“What are you even worrying about?”

“Well...what if you get the corona virius?... it can be deadly, you know!! Thousands of people have died from it!!! The fact school is shutting down and people are panicking is making me feel like i should be panicking-“

Tsukki will then snarkily reassure him it’s fine and people their age are the least likely to get it bad.

Yamaguchi will feel a little better afterwords

“Thank you, Tsukki!”

Tsukki will ‘tch’ it off

Even though he gets really good grades he has triuble finding motivation to do any school work?? doing school work in his own home? 😐

His home was kinda a place he can chill whereas school is a place he can be fully focused

but now his home is ALSO school??!!?

Luckily he understands the work, at least.

When he sees tsukishima on the call, too, he instantly says hello.

“Tsukki!! Hey!! 😁”

“Shut up.”

“Gomen, Tsukki.”

Yeah. Even when they aren’t at school, he’s still the same as always.

He takes extra care of his family and always stays in touch with other relatives. Especially grandpa and grandma. THE SECOND he learned elderly people are at more risk you bet your ass he’s calling them making sure they’re okay. He checks up on them everyday now.

He peobably practices volleyball a little, too. He’s more focused on schoolwork though.

Sugawara Koushi

Have you guys ate dinner yet? 🥺

obviously checking up on everyone

he would fail as a mother if he didn’t.

Actually reads in his free time?? He finally has time on his hands to read these books so.... here we are!

Wakes up at a scheduled time everyday (minus weekends. Maybe sleeps for an extra hour or so).

He dresses in pjs rather than actual clothes because he’s not going anywhere with this social distancing thing.

Always tries to lighten the mood when all the students are on the online call. Maybe crack some joke or innocently play around with the effects.

He still pays close attention in class and does quite well on his own. No help from his parents! He can do everything on his own! He a big boi!

Does homework really well, too. Probably does extra work or more work than needed just because it makes him feel good afterwords.

Honestly i can see him cooking in his free time. If he doesnt feel like reading or scrolling mindlessly through his phone, he gonna cook.

Will make the best cookies in the universe.

HAS A HECK OF A SWEET TOOTH. NOT A DAY GOES BY WITHOUT HIM GETTING HIS PRETTY HANDS ON SUM TREAT

Honestly isn’t too good with exercise so he might gain a few pounds or grow the smallest chub 🥺🥺🥺 he would be so cute omfg.

is realy involved with his family!! they play a board/card game every friday night and have the best time.

if he has a dog, cat, or literally any animal you know he’s gona be hanging with them since he has more time.

Still! Playing! Volleyball! I mean by now every boy is practicing at least a little bit. He would probably be in his backyard playing volleyball with his family. Theyy’d set up a net and everythin! They’re all rookies at it but he still cherishes the moments with them.

It’s honestly still practice. Better than nothing

He talks about how his family plays volleyball and everyone is so jealous like 😭😭 makes him more grateful hearing half the volleyball team saying they have to practice alone.

Watching youtube videos of random videos/vines making him giggling.

“Hey, Dachi, look at this video.”

IS A SWEETHEART STFU !!!

[whumphoarder]

Dad Level: 3000

Summary: Peter comes down with the flu while visiting the Stark family (and Happy) at the lake house during his spring break from MIT. Thankfully, Tony has been spending the last five years honing his Dad Skills™. He's got this.

Word count: 5,227

Genre: sickfic, hurt/comfort, fluff, whump

A/N: This story is set in March 2025. Morgan is five and Peter is 18 (but also 23 on paper, which totally isn’t confusing at all).

Most of the events of Infinity War/Endgame happened, except Captain Marvel did the snap with her mighty-glowing-lady-warrior-powers and so no one freaking died.

Thanks to @sallyidss and @xxx-cat-xxx for beta reading <3

Link to read on AO3

Tony walks into the kitchen Monday morning to see his five-year-old daughter standing on her tiptoes on a chair, attempting to reach a small cardboard box inside the open freezer.

“What is this, a heist?” he asks, moving towards Morgan. He loops an arm around her middle and lifts her into his arms, planting a quick kiss on the top of her head and causing the little girl to giggle. “I thought Mommy said no juice pops before noon.”

“It’s for Peter,” she says simply.

“Oh it’s for Peter, is it?” he asks, quirking an eyebrow. “And why does Peter need a juice pop at ten in the morning?”

“Because he doesn’t feel good and juice pops always make me feel better,” Morgan concludes.

Tony’s brow furrows, but he just steps closer to the freezer to allow her to reach into the box properly. Now that he thinks about it, Peter had seemed pretty wiped last night, but he’d brushed it off as midterm exam stress. “I think he likes the orange ones best,” he advises.

Morgan fishes out an orange popsicle and Tony lowers her back down to the floor. She skips off down the hall, around the corner, and all the way to the cabin’s guest bedroom where the kid has been staying for the past two days since MIT spring break had officially begun. Tony follows along, his frown deepening when she continues straight through the room and pushes open the slightly ajar door to the ensuite bathroom.

It’s a sorry sight indeed. Peter is slumped on the floor, propped up between the bathtub and toilet, eyes half-closed and his cheek resting on the edge of the bowl. One arm is wrapped around his stomach and he’s pale and sweaty.

Morgan, bless her heart, runs right over to him. “I got you a juice pop!” she says brightly.

Peter blinks up at her and then swallows thickly before offering her the weakest of smiles. “Oh. Thanks,” he croaks. “Uh, do you think you can do me a big favor and eat it for me?”

Spinning around, Morgan gazes up at Tony, her eyes big. “Can I?”

Despite his growing concern, Tony huffs out a quick laugh. “Sure, why not,” he agrees. Pepper is the one always reminding him to choose his battles after all. “We’ll just keep this one to ourselves.”

As Morgan unwraps the plastic from her popsicle, Peter closes his eyes tightly and swallows again, face draining even further of color.

Tony pats Morgan on the shoulder. “Hey, why don’t you go eat that with Uncle Happy? I’m gonna sit here with Peter for a little while.”

“Okay,” she agrees, spinning around on her heel.

The moment she’s gone, Tony’s attention turns back to his other kid, who is looking even more miserable now. “Not feeling so hot, huh?”

Peter shakes his head slightly, letting his eyelids squeeze shut again. “‘M’sorry,” he murmurs.

If Peter didn’t look so pathetic right now, Tony would have rolled his eyes. Instead, he just lets out a small sigh. “Not your fault, kiddo,” he assures. “You throw up?”

“Not yet,” Peter mumbles, then swallows again. “Just... feel really sick.”

“C’mon, Happy’s tuna casserole wasn’t that bad…” he tries to joke, but it falls flat when Peter doesn’t so much as smirk.

Tony steps further into the bathroom and crouches down beside the kid, wincing as his knees click in protest. “Is it just your stomach?”

“I dunno.” Peter shrugs tiredly. “Kinda ache all over...”

Tony places his hand on the back of Peter’s neck and instantly can feel the heat radiating off the kid’s sweaty skin. Peter shivers at the touch. “Your hand is really cold,” he complains.

“Nah, you’re just warm,” Tony disagrees, moving his hand to press to Peter’s forehead instead. He sighs and pushes himself back up to standing. “Think you’ll be okay here for a few minutes?”

“Yeah, ‘course,” Peter croaks, looking a little guilty. “You really don’t have to stay. I know you’re busy…”

“Ah, see that’s the beauty of the retired stay-at-home-dad life,” Tony retorts, straightening back up to standing. “This is literally my job now.”

Before Peter has a chance to dwell too much on that response, Tony exits the room and heads to the master bathroom to locate the thermometer, and then to his lab to grab the bottle of spidey-kid-strength painkiller and fever reducer pills he and Bruce had concocted. Hopefully, they wouldn’t have to use them—he knows Peter hates the way the meds knock him on his ass and make his thoughts fuzzy and disconnected—but he figures it would be good to have them on hand just in case.

After making a quick detour through the kitchen for a can of ginger ale and some crackers, he heads back to the guest room, quickening his pace when he hears the telltale sound of retching and splashing issuing from the bathroom.

“Aw, Pete…” He winces in sympathy at the gagging boy. Peter’s nose is running and his eyes are red and wet with tears.

“Flu was going ‘round the dorm last week…” Peter moans as Tony sets the items down on the counter and wets a washcloth at the sink. “Thought I lucked out. Guess not.”

Tony places a hand on the kid’s sweaty t-shirt to start rubbing circles on his back. But he freezes instantly when he feels Peter tense up at the touch.

“You alright?” he checks, hand hovering just over the kid’s shoulder blades.

“Yeah,” Peter rasps. “Jus’... you never did that before.”

Tony recalls the handful of times he’d seen Peter sick during their time together before. Vomit has never fazed him—he’s had much too colorful of a past for that—but before he was definitely more inclined to offer a joke or a sarcastic remark than to settle for being a comforting presence. Funny what five years with a child who turns into a clingy octopus whenever she’s ill have done to him.

Then again, Morgan is in kindergarten while Peter is eighteen (or twenty-three, according to his birth certificate—it’s been over a year since Thanos and still no one seems entirely sure how to refer to the un-vanished). Maybe the Comforting Presence™ protocol is different for teenagers.

He is just about to offer to step out in order to give the kid some privacy when Peter interrupts his thoughts. “’S’nice,” he murmurs. “May does it too.”

Tony’s heart swells a bit. Then the moment is shattered when Peter suddenly sticks his head back over the toilet and starts gagging again.

“Alright, alright, get it all out…” With a small sigh, Tony lowers himself down to sit on the floor beside Peter and resumes rubbing his back.

When he’s finally finished, Tony flushes the toilet and Peter slumps back against the tub, his eyes closed. Instinctively, Tony lifts the washcloth up to wipe his messy face. Peter flinches at the contact and weakly reaches a hand up to take the cloth.

“Sorry, can do it myself,” he mumbles. “‘S’gross…”

Tony gives a quick snort. “Nah, you know what’s really gross? When I found Morgan’s secret booger stash on the side of her bedroom dresser.” He shudders dramatically.

Almost instantly, Tony regrets his comment when it triggers another round of heaving from Peter. “Sorry, kiddo,” he says as he rubs Peter’s back. “That was on me.”

This time when the spasms cease and Peter slumps back against the tub, he doesn’t bother protesting when Tony cleans his face and flushes the evidence away for him. Tony cracks open the can of ginger ale and passes it to the kid.

“Small sips, okay?” he instructs, reaching up to the counter for the thermometer.

“Can’t FRIDAY just tell you that?” Peter asks as Tony flips on the device.

“Morgan’s pediatrician convinced me this is more accurate,” Tony replies, inserting it in Peter’s ear. “Just be glad she’s graduated to the aural one now. You would not be happy about where this guy had me sticking it for the first year or so.”

“Huh?” Peter blinks at him. Then all of a sudden it seems to click and he groans, “Mr. Starrrk.”

The thermometer beeps. Still smirking, Tony lowers the device down to read the display. His grin falters for a second at the number.

“Wha’s it say?” Peter croaks.

“Nothing we can’t fix,” Tony replies briskly.

“But what’s it say?” Peter repeats. He weakly attempts to get the thermometer from Tony’s grip, but his mentor just holds the device out of his reach, lightly swatting the kid’s hand away.

Peter stares blankly at Tony for a second before glancing upwards. “What’s my temp, FRI?” he asks wearily.

“103.2,” FRIDAY reports.

Tony scoffs, finally flipping around the thermometer to show the ‘103.1’ displayed on the screen. “See? The doctor was right—manual is much better.”

Peter glances nervously at the orange pill bottle on the counter. “Does that mean I have to take the meds?” he whispers.

Tony hesitates for a second. While he knows 103 is not exactly life-threatening, it’s still a far cry from normal. “It would probably make you feel better if we could get it lower,” he reasons.

“It’s not worth it,” Peter mumbles. “They make me feel weird.”

“I wish we had something better for you, bud,” Tony says with a sigh. He considers their options for a moment. “Alright, how about we wait a while and see if it goes down on its own?” he suggests. “But if you hit 104, I’m making an executive decision.”

“Deal,” Peter croaks.

They sit there for a few more minutes, Peter taking deep breaths and looking like he might fall asleep right there against the tub. Finally, Tony’s stiff back protests. “How’s your stomach now?” he asks.

Without opening his eyes, Peter lifts a hand and makes a so-so gesture.

“Well, you seem pretty empty,” Tony goes on. “What do you say we move this party elsewhere?”

“Mm...‘kay,” Peter breathes. Tony pushes himself up to standing and helps him up, supporting him under the elbows. Peter sways on his feet. “Whoa…” he murmurs.

Tony quickly adjusts his grip to get a better hold on the kid. “You dizzy?” he asks.

“Kinda,” Peter admits. ”Just need a sec.”

When it seems like he can safely move without passing out, Tony helps him out of the bathroom and sits him on the edge of the bed.

“Let’s change your shirt, okay?” Tony says.

“Huh?” Peter glances down, for the first time seeming to notice how soaked with sweat his shirt is. “Oh. Yeah.”

Tony locates (what he hopes is) a clean t-shirt from the kid’s messy duffel bag on the floor and watches him pull it on. The simple act seems to take far more effort than usual.

“You wanna go back to sleep?” Tony offers.

Peter’s only response is a non-committal grunt. “Don’t think I can,” he admits. “Woke up at like, six. Couldn’t really fall back asleep.”

“Should we try the couch then?”

At the kid’s nod, Tony guides him out to the living room, keeping a firm grip around Peter’s upper arm for support. Morgan, Happy, and a staggering array of the five-year-old’s favorite toys are currently occupying at least two-thirds of the room’s large sectional sofa while reruns of Peppa Pig play on the TV.

“Peter!” Morgan exclaims when he comes into view. She hops down off the sofa and runs over to them while Happy stands up and starts clearing off some of the cushions to make room for Peter. “Is your tummy feeling better?” she asks. “Can you play now?”

Despite how miserable Peter looks, he manages to give her a half-smile. “Um, maybe in a little while…”

Tony takes pity on the kid and intervenes. “Peter’s not feeling that great, so how about we just watch a movie?” he suggests as he situates the teenager on the chaise section of the couch.

Morgan’s eyes light up. “Can we see Frozen 3?”

“God no,” Happy grumbles, sinking down into a nearby armchair. “That damn song with all of Olaf’s little frolicking snowball children was stuck in my head for a week last time.”

“There’s a Frozen 3 now?” Peter questions, his brow wrinkling. “There wasn’t even a Frozen 2 when I got dusted.”

“Yeah, well, global crisis or not, Disney marches on,” Tony retorts. He tugs a fuzzy blanket out of the stack in the wicker bin by the fireplace and tosses it to Peter, who gives a little grunt of thanks. “For the record, Cars 4 was better than Cars 2, but it was no Cars 3.”

“See, I think they peaked at Cars 5: European Adventure,” Happy argues.

“Nah,” Tony scoffs. “There were at least three too many roundabout jokes.”

“But Mater and Fillmore driving the Autobahn was peak comedy.”

Peter is still struggling to unfold the blanket, so Tony takes it back and shakes it open for him. “What are you in the mood for, kid?” he asks as he tucks it around Peter.

“Whatever you want,” Peter mumbles, leaning back against the pillows. He looks utterly exhausted—Tony figures he’ll be lucky to make it fifteen minutes into the movie before falling asleep. Best to go with something he’s already seen then.

“Lilo & Stitch?” he suggests.

The kids agree, Morgan with much more enthusiasm than Peter. Happy even gives his begrudging blessing on the basis that at least it’s ‘not another damn musical’.

(As if FRIDAY didn’t already have half a dozen audio recordings of him singing “Let It Go” in the shower).

Tony instructs FRIDAY to start the movie before heading back to Peter’s bathroom to gather all the supplies he left, and also snags the room’s small trash can because if there’s one thing he’s learned from Morgan, it’s that you can never be too careful.

Peter’s breathing has already evened out as the opening credits fade from the screen and Tony sinks down into the sofa beside him, and by the time Lilo explains why she can’t give Pudge a tuna fish sandwich, Peter is snoring quietly.

X

To Tony’s relief, Peter sleeps straight through the remainder of the movie, with Happy joining him somewhere around the halfway point. The moment the film ends, Morgan hops off the sofa. “I’m hungry,” she announces. “Can we have mac and cheese?”

Peter gives a low moan and stirs slightly in his sleep. Tony locks eyes with Morgan and presses a finger to his lips, tilting his head sideways in the boy’s direction.

Her eyes go wide with understanding and she tries again in a stage whisper (which honestly isn’t any better than her normal volume). “Can we have mac and cheese?”

Sighing, Tony pushes himself up to standing and prods her along to the kitchen. “Fine. But only if you eat a vegetable with it.”

Morgan grins. “Okay! I want corn.”

“Corn isn’t a real vegetable,” Tony grumbles. He steers them both into the room and moves towards the cabinet where they keep the pasta. “Pick something green.”

Her face falls for a moment. Then, just as quickly as they darkened, her eyes light up again. “Green jello!”

Tony rolls his eyes. He takes out a box of mac and cheese and then opens the fridge to take stock of what’s on hand. “You’re getting cucumber,” he says after a moment.

“I don’t like cucumber,” she pouts, crossing her arms over her chest.

Tony frowns at her. “But you said it was your favorite last week.”

“I don’t like it anymore,” she says simply. “It’s gross. Can we have pudding?”

“That’s the opposite of a vegetable,” Tony argues. “So if you’re eating that, now you have to have two vegetables.”

“Um… Potato chips?” she asks hopefully.

Tony runs a hand over his face in exasperation. “No, that’s not a—”

“Hey Tony?” Happy’s voice calls from the living room. There’s an edge of worry to it. “Can you come here?”

“Yeah, coming,” Tony replies, a feeling of dread already sinking in. He heads back to the living room, Morgan tailing along behind.

The sight awaiting him causes Tony’s heart to clench. Happy is standing over Peter, urgently shaking his shoulder while the kid moans incoherently and tosses in his sleep, clearly in the midst of a nightmare.

“He’s not waking up,” Happy says worriedly.

“I got it,” Tony says, quickly closing the distance between himself and the sofa. “Hey, Pete, naptime is over,” he commands as he taps Peter’s unusually warm cheek. “C’mon, rise and shine. I’d offer to make you some breakfast, but it looks like you’re already cookin’…”

It takes a moment, but finally Peter wakes. His eyes snap open and he sits up gasping.

“There we go,” Tony soothes, rubbing a hand down Peter’s arm. “You’re alright.”

Peter blinks at him. “...Mr. Stark?” Tears are already welling up in the kid’s eyes and falling before he can stop them. His breath hitches in his throat. “Oh god…” he sobs. “I thought… I-I was trapped and...”

“It’s okay.” He sits down beside Peter on the sofa and wraps an arm around him, pulling him into his side. Even six years out from the initial snap, Tony still has nightmares—he can only imagine what Peter must be going through. “You’re okay, you’re safe, just a dream,” he assures.

“Daddy?” Morgan asks nervously. Tony glances back and sees her standing just inside the room’s threshold, lip trembling.

“Hey, munchkin,” Tony says, giving her a forced smile. “Peter’s fine. You wanna go teach Uncle Happy how to make the mac and cheese? Don’t let him add tuna.”

Eyes still locked on Peter, Morgan nods slowly.

Happy moves over to take her hand. “C’mon, kiddo,” he says as he ushers her back to the kitchen. “And don’t listen to your daddy, tuna is a great source of protein…”

The moment they leave, Tony focuses his attention back on Peter, who is just now starting to get his breathing back under control.

“‘M’sorry…” Peter chokes out. “I just thought I was trapped there, and, and…”

“It’s okay, Pete,” Tony says gently. “You’re here with me, not on Titan, not in the soul stone. You’re safe.”

“Titan?” Peter asks, his brow wrinkling. “Wha’ about Titan?”

Tony frowns. “Your nightmare? Trapped on Titan, right?”

Peter’s tears have stopped now and he’s staring at Tony with glassy eyes. “Wasn’t on Titan,” he mutters. “Nick Fury found out I was a spider and sucked me up in a giant vacuum cleaner”—his breath hitches again—“an’ I was swirlin’ around and I couldn’t get out, and someone was chasing me with a giant spray can, and there was this cat but like, a monster cat, and—”

Okay, that wasn’t what Tony expected. He places a hand on Peter’s forehead and feels the heat pouring off of him. Taking the thermometer from the coffee table, he turns it on and sticks it in Peter’s ear.

When it beeps this time, the display reads 104.2.

Tony lets out a low whistle, already starting to untangle the blanket from around Peter. “Alright... guess we’re doing the meds now.”

Peter groans, rubbing a hand at his eyes. “Mr. Stark…”

“Nope, non-negotiable,” Tony replies. He grabs the pill bottle from the coffee table along with the package of crackers. “And you have to eat something so they stay down.”

Despite his grumbling, Peter takes the crackers Tony passes him and nibbles at them between sips of ginger ale. When he’s managed to get two down, Tony gives him the pill.

“I know you’re not a fan, but it’ll help with the pain too,” Tony promises.

“Hm, that’s good…” Peter croaks. “Have a headache. And my throat hurts.”

Tony hums in sympathy. “I can imagine.”

Stepping out, he wets a washcloth with cool water in the bathroom and returns to place it over Peter’s forehead and eyes.

Immediately, Peter lets out a sigh. “That’s really nice,” he whispers.

They rest like that for a few minutes until a small voice interrupts them. “Um, Peter?”

Peter lowers the cloth and both of them glance back to see Morgan padding into the room, a stuffed corgi dog plushie tucked under one arm, an orange popsicle clutched in the other hand. Happy is standing just inside the threshold, leaning against the door jamb with his arms crossed casually.

“Hey.” Peter manages a half-smile.

“I got you another juice pop,” she says, handing it over. “And this is Korg, he’ll make you feel better,” she adds as she nestles the toy into the crook of Peter’s elbow.

“Korg?” Peter questions as his fingers fumble to unwrap the popsicle.

“Thor named him,” Tony replies. “Apparently he’s got a buddy with the same name—thought it would be hilarious when he learned what this breed was called.”

“Uncle Happy said you had a scary dream,” Morgan goes on, plopping down on the couch next to the boy.

Peter’s already fever-flushed face goes a little redder. “Oh, yeah. I guess it was kinda silly.”

“You can tell Korg about it,” she says, stroking the plush dog’s head. “He can’t laugh because he’s not real.”

Seeming caught off guard by that, Peter barks out a sharp laugh which quickly morphs into coughs, but Tony is glad because it’s the first real humor he’s seen from the kid all day.

X

While Happy and Morgan eat their mac and cheese—with tuna for Happy, peas for Morgan—Tony manages to cajole Peter into eating half a can of chicken noodle before the kid nods off with the spoon halfway to his mouth.

“Sorry...” Peter murmurs as Tony dabs the spilled broth off his shirt with a wad of paper towels. “Tired.”

Tony sighs. “Yeah, that would be the meds kicking in,” he says. He checks Peter’s temperature again and sees it’s down to 102.7 now. “At least they’re working.”

“Hmm…” Peter hums sleepily.

“Let’s go ahead and move you to your real bed,” Tony decides. “It’ll be more comfortable to stretch out.”

“Hmm…” he says again.

Tony hoists the wobbly boy to his feet, supporting him under his arm. “You should probably have a shower when you wake up, but I’m thinking it’s a safety concern at the moment.”

“Hmm…”

“Okay, not in the chattiest mood, I get it…”

Tony shuffles him back to the guest room and changes his shirt again. Then he helps Peter crawl into bed and pulls the covers up around him.

“Alright underoos, take a nap,” he says softly. “I’ll keep the little troublemaker from bothering you.”

“Hmm... and Morgan too?” Peter murmurs.

“Smartass,” Tony says, rolling his eyes. “Keep an eye on him, FRI,” he commands the AI. “Sleep well, kid.”

X

After fixing himself his own lunch, Tony spends the next two hours alternating between entertaining a rambunctious five-year-old and trying to catch up on his backlog of SI paperwork for Pepper. He’s sitting at the kitchen table with Morgan, watching her color a page out of her Frozen 3 coloring book, as he skims through yet another proposal on his tablet. That’s when FRIDAY’s voice comes over the speakers.

“Boss, Peter’s temperature has just reached 103 degrees. He is awake and appears to be in distress,” FRIDAY reports.

“Shit,” Tony mutters, getting to his feet.

“You said only Mommy can say that word,” Morgan complains as she colors Elsa’s hair bright purple.

“Yeah, yeah, I was just borrowing it from her,” he mutters. “I’m gonna go check on Peter, okay?”

She nods, still coloring intently. “‘Kay.”

Tony hurries out of the kitchen and down the hall towards the guest bedroom, fully prepared to talk Peter down from another nightmare. What he’s not prepared for is the sight that awaits him.

Peter is sitting up in bed, hunched over himself and trembling. Liquidy vomit is running all down his shirt and soaking into the comforter.

“Aw, bud…” Tony sighs, quickly moving over to the bed. “You really go all out, don’t you?”

Peter doesn’t even look up. His breaths are coming out far too quick, and he’s mumbling something under his breath.

Tony places a hand on his shoulder, causing Peter to jerk his head up, revealing the tear tracks trailing down his cheeks.

“Hey, hey, what’s going on?” Tony asks in alarm.

“S-Sorry…” Peter chokes out. “I just, for a minute, I didn’t know where I was. Called for May and she didn’ answer, so thought I was at the d-dorm, but this isn’t a bunk bed, an’ then I thought I was in the stone but it’s not orange, and then I felt sick but I couldn't get up fast enough, and I just—”

(Okay so the PTSD was just a bit delayed.)

“You’re okay, you’re fine,” Tony assures, rubbing a hand up and down over the kid’s back. “You’re here at the lake house and you’re safe.”

“’M’sorry…” Peter sniffs, hanging his head. “This is dumb, maybe I should just have May come pick me up”—his nose is dripping and he sniffs again—“you shouldn’t have to take care of me when I’m being all gross”—sniff—“a-and...”

Absently, Tony pulls several tissues from the box on the nightstand and holds them to Peter’s messy face. “Blow.”

Peter goes silent and Tony freezes as the realization of what he’s just done sinks in.

Tissues still pressed to his nose, Peter raises an eyebrow to his mentor. “D-Did… Did you just tell me to blow my nose?”

Tony recovers quickly. “C’mon, it’s swallowing all that crap that’s making you feel sick in the first place,” he points out. “Now blow.”

So Peter does.

Tony lowers the used tissue back down and tosses it into the trash can. “Better?”

Looking mildly traumatized, Peter deadpans, “Iron Man just wiped my nose.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’ll live,” Tony dismisses him with a hand wave. Then in a more gentle tone, he asks, “Now do you really want to go home? Because I get it if you do, but I promise, I really don’t mind taking care of you. And with your healing, you’ll probably be feeling better in another day or so. There’ll still be plenty of your break left.”

Peter hesitates. “I dunno. I mean…” He shrugs. “I guess, I don’t really want to leave, but…” he trails off, sounding conflicted.

After a moment, Tony intervenes. “Okay, here’s an idea,” he suggests, as casually as he can manage. “You’re looking a little more steady now, so how about I run a load of laundry and you go take a shower? You can call May after and decide what you want to do. Then we’ll go from there.”

A look of relief instantly washes over Peter at the suggestion. “Yeah, that sounds good,” he whispers. “Thanks.”

X

During the next half hour, Tony checks on Morgan—who is contentedly playing with toys on her bedroom floor—before stripping Peter’s bed and running a load of laundry. When he reenters the guestroom, he finds Peter sitting on the bare mattress in fresh pajamas and with wet hair, looking much more relaxed.

“How’s May?” Tony asks.

Peter shrugs. “Her shift just ended. She said she’s sorry I’m sick.” He pauses for a beat. “Also said she’s not surprised, given all the all-nighters I pulled during the last two weeks and the fact I’ve been mostly living off cereal, ramen noodles, and Fig Newtons this semester.”

Tony snorts out a laugh. “Yeah, that’ll do it.” According to FRIDAY, the lukewarm water of the shower has had the added benefit of bringing Peter’s temperature down to just over 102 and he’s looking significantly better for it. “Still wanna bail on us?”

Peter shakes his head, a bit sheepish. “Not if you don’t mind me staying.”

“Nah, ‘course not,” Tony assures. “Now you wanna go see if Morgan’s up for another movie yet?”

Peter agrees and the two of them shuffle upstairs. As they approach the landing, they can hear muffled voices issuing from the little girl’s bedroom.

“Do you want some more?” Morgan’s voice floats down the hall.

“Yeah, fine. Two sugar, no cream…” a gruff voice replies. “And one of those cookies.”

“No, no you have to call it a biscuit,” she insists, her tone just bordering on a whine. “Mommy says that’s more fancy.”

“It’s a double-stuffed Oreo,” Happy grouses. “It’s a goddamn cookie.”

Peter shoots his mentor a perplexed look. Tony just gives a shrug in return as he pushes Morgan’s door open and then they both immediately pause.

Happy glances up at them from where he’s seated cross-legged on the floor beside the kiddie table. One of Pepper’s silk scarves is wrapped around his shoulders making some sort of shawl, and he’s wearing Morgan’s flowery sun hat with several of her homemade plastic beaded necklaces hanging around his neck. Meanwhile, Morgan sits in the chair to his right, pouring pretend tea from her little plastic teapot into a tiny cup.

Peter leans closer into his mentor’s side. “I think my fever went up,” he whispers. “I’m hallucinating.”

Happy shrugs. “What can I say? She makes a mean chamomile.” Pinching the minuscule handle of his teacup between his thumb and forefinger, pinky raised, he lifts it to his lips and mimes taking a sip.

“Do you guys wanna join us?” Morgan asks hopefully. She’s dressed in her yellow Princess Belle dress and her hair is sporting a loose braid that definitely wasn’t there last time Tony saw her.

Peter hesitates a second, looking into the little girl’s wide eyes. Then he lets out a small sigh. “Well, May did say I should be drinking more fluids…” he mutters as he moves towards the kiddie table, Tony following along behind.

X

When Pepper arrives home from work just past seven that evening, she finds Peter, Tony, and Happy passed out on the sofa and snoring softly amid an array of Morgan’s plush toys. The little girl sits beside them with a bowl of popcorn nestled in her lap, intently watching Frozen 3 on the room’s massive TV.

“Mommy!” Morgan greets, hopping off the sofa and running over to her.

“Hey, sweetheart,” Pepper says as she scoops the five-year-old up in her arms. She gazes around the room, taking in the interesting fashion choices on display. It seems half of her accessory drawer has been commandeered to adorn the three men on the sofa.

Morgan’s full plastic tea service—now complete with Gatorade in the teacups and Saltine crackers on the plastic saucers—has been moved to the living room coffee table. Besides the dishes, the table also contains the thermometer, an empty soup bowl, and a box of tissues, and on the floor in front of the couch is a lined trash can. “What happened here?” she asks.

“Peter didn’t feel good, but Daddy took his temperature and gave him medicine and I got him juice pops,” Morgan reports. “And then we had tea and I gave Uncle Happy and Daddy makeovers.”

Pepper peers closer, noticing the two older men’s nails are painted with sparkly lilac-colored polish and their cheeks are looking a bit more glittery than normal.

“Good girl,” Pepper praises, giving her a quick kiss on her forehead. “Looks like you all took good care of each other.”

X

Fic Masterlist

For more fluffy illness, try:

Give the Kid an Oscar 

Bedridden Spider

Sick as a Bug

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

He makes me livid! I get so mad!!! I don't understand him at all. He makes me go UGH but in bad ways.

I went off on him first before I realised what his problem was... Like total accusations and misfit drama. All paranoid loca. I don't give a shit.

I draw conclusions and those were the most obvious.

But when you know someone... You have to remember their stupidity. One time he confessed... And I already had decided to break up with him... I was all I'm waiting till his dad dies then I'm done. He's a good friend when he tries but he doesn't make me,a priority. And so I hadn't told him. I just tired of him,upsetting me so I had to remove me.

So he said he wouldn't do anything for his pain,then, he would take 2x his Percocet with 5 shots of tequila then treat me like shit.

I really hadnt noticed. I was all "oh he's just in his mood where he's decided I'm not important to him"

And true enough when he told me his dad died I walked away from our relationship.

But honestly ... Years later... I missed him.. Because he treated me best. Because I say I walked

I mean I left, completely.

But despite his faults he's always treated me best. I mean person to person. He didn't give me what I wanted from,the relationship. But as a low key friend, he understood me the most

He understood i was scared to go to sleep and he would stay on the phone and help,me,sleep so I could. No one else can do that. My daughter, if she was sleeping with me. I could listen to her breathe and I could fall asleep that way. Because it would calm my r breathing if she was sleeping that calm sleep,breath

But he knew all what to say. And I never had to tell him or even tell him I was afraid to sleep or even admit it to myself.

I hope this helps some of y'all that are anti medicine as well.

I don't like hospitals or doctors (I like my personal doctors But aside from them) in general. I'm afraid of them. They make me hostile. I feel like theyre some dangerous S&M dungeon

Go and wait for hours to get bad news then they don't give you what you need because you're so fucking exhausted they don't understand. Or don't care or are the ones that like to kill patients.

So I like my doctors although I have to wait for hours to see them past my appointment time, they take extra time to see me and cover what I think I need. Their quality is worth the wait. I have 3. Primary, Pain and Urgent Care. And I use the computer urgent care where I leave an online message after finishing a long ass quizz through the insurance website.

And whatever pills they give me, I Google to make sure they were right. They always are. Im also interested in what else the pills cover. Like i take 2 different anti seizure pills for pain and one also for insulin sensitivity increase and metabolic increase. And i take an antidepressant that also covers fibromyalgia.

I have 13 prescriptions. Monthly. Some I have to take more than once per day. Plus i take vitamins.

Then I Google the pharmacy pills to make sure the pharmacy was right.

So.

I get it. Sometimes I don't want to take 13 prescriptions more than once per day or even at all.

But we need to know what we are taking and why.

And why it is important.

And we need to take our medicine. So we can survive

I think this information is especially important during this epidemic.

Now realize that antibiotics are not useful on viruses unless the virus causes a bacterial infection. Like.

A cold is a virus but in some people like myself and used to in my daughter, causes a severe sinus infection which requires antibiotics.

I know the point at which we need antibiotics and so i go to my urgent care lady because she understands and we just do a walk in. And i don't overwhelm my doctor who is taking time to give quality care and has long waiting patients.

But otherwise a virus does not respond to antibiotics. And anti-virus medications are quite rare.

Flu shot... But not a cold shot..

So we take over the counter medicine for our symptoms. Like coughing and runny nose

Sinus pressure in the eyes, nose, teeth. Jaw.

If you have a tooth ache you can take sinus medicine. Because the worst tooth pain is actually in your sinus cavity! That's a secret trick. Works every time.

So basically anytime you have facial pain that doesn't respond to Tylenol or ibuprofen or alieve, you can take sinus medicine. Also ear pain.

Google sinus cavities in the face and you'll see why.

Now an ear and sinus infection is a bacteria, usually but usually our bodies can fight it Well without an anti biotic. As long as it is treated with over the counter medicine. But sometimes, like with myself and my daughter, sometimes an antibiotic is needed..but that is after at least a week to 10 days of serious green overflow that doesn't respond to over the counter medicine.

Sometimes the bacteria is lab revealed by terrorists during the "flu and cold season" to create an income for pharmaceutical companies. For my daughter and i, they're usually too strong for our immune system.

Although since my ex husband left town, my daughter's immune system has significantly became stronger. While mine has not. So she needs less antibiotics, than I do.

Otherwise, my body can fight it on its own with a few doses of otc.

I had a tooth pulled a few years ago.. It created a pathway to my sinuses. I could rinse water in my mouth and it would come out my nose. I saw an ear, nose and throat specialist whom said i needed surgery immediately to repair my nose.

I said no thank you mother fucker

I had to have clearance from my cardiologist. So i took a stress test and failed. So i had to have an ultra sound. It wasn't good. But they said I could have the surgery since it was simple.

I said that's cool, but I don't want to.

I haven't done it. So I get sinus infection and pain quite often. My bone structure in my nose is center in my right nostril. Meaning it's really fucking bad

From being punched in the face a lot. The surgery sounds fucking horrible. And it's a cosmetic change.

I'm all nope. I'm a single mom. She don't take good care of me. I'll drown in the blood sliding down the back of my throat.

The tooth removal was so bad... It was horrible. There was blood every where for days... I can only imagine the nose surgery would be the same

I also hate the smell of blood. So I'm like no. It sounds like the most miserable thing.

If I had someone to take care of me and baby me like a little blood soaked lamb in need of care... That's s different story.. But I don't have anyone that would take care of me

After my tooth... I was throwing up the blood and my kid just stood there and stared,. Which I wanted to hide it from her I was sick... But I was in the kitchen and began violently puking in the trash can... Scared her to death

"Mom I'm scared"

"I am, too. This has never happened before"

So yeah fuck that nose. I got one crooked fucking nose. And it makes me sick.

She wants me to have surgery so I'll quit snoring.

Well.

Ear plugs are at the Dollar Tree, babe.

So y'all take your pills that you need

Some one cares about you

And they don't want to slap your face off. But you'll drive them to it. And a crooked nose isnt all its cracked up to Be. It pretty much sucks.

I can't even blow it Like a normal person....

[generalelectricllama]

I threw up- very suddenly and painfully- almost completely undigested dinner (from at that point 7 hours before) and bright red blood specks. Freaked out because that is NOT NORMAL for me in any way. Got my cousin to drive me to the nearest ED. I called them and warned them ahead of time that I have been having COVID19 symptoms and planned on getting tested asap. 

They got me back, while not allowing my cousin who brought me to come in as well (kudos to the staff, they were very nice and polite about it), and got my vitals as soon as i had gotten a wrist band around my arm. While my BP was higher than normal, my oxygen count was almost perfect and I had no fever.

I explained to the doctor everything that had been going on. From my start of symptoms on 3/19 and what those symptoms were (hard to breathe, sore throat, coughing with occasional mucus production, horrible sinus issues, body aches, etc) and how the cough would come and go but I still felt like crap. How I’d had an almost constant headache for over a week now and had been feeling nauseas for 2 days now, but just finally threw up suddenly tonight.

How I had been taking aspirin every 4 hours since I had an allergic reaction to the medication the dentist gave me when they pulled my tooth and they refused to send in another for me. How that I possibly and highly likely had UC or crohn’s and that I was waiting on getting a colonoscopy to be sure. Doc told me that I was throwing up bright red blood spots because its highly likely the aspirin caused a big ulcer and that I needed to not take more. 

He gave me a prescription for nausea, for an antacid, and for something to coat my stomach to let it heal. He also emphasized that I needed to call the number for the main hospital test location for COVID19 as soon as they opened tomorrow to get prescreened and make an appointment to get tested. He explained that he wasnt gonna admit me or do testing of any kind because my oxygen levels were near perfect. So apparently they are looking at oxygen levels because of how bad this virus affects the lungs.

He said the CDC wasn’t allowing them to do flu testing or anything else to reduce the risk of exposing someone to CV or flu or etc. I don’t blame him. He was very nice and definitely didn;t make me feel stupid for coming in (even though this location was empty and had minimal staff). 

I plan to call this number to get tested if possible to make sure. being in limbo about this is miserable.

[zanesgirlfriend]

Little Clickbait Onesie

Description: David thinks his girlfriend is pregnant.

Requested?: Yes by @sizzlescott : can you do something with david where him and all of the vlog squad think you’re pregnant from a bunch of things that you’ve done recently which seem like symptoms of you being pregnant. then in the end you take a test and it’s negative. you have the flu

A/N: I really loved this concept, thank you for requesting it!

_______

She woke up nauseous. David was awakened to the sound of her puking into the toilet.

"Are you okay, baby?" He sat up, checking the time. It was way too early for him to be awake, considering he had only gone to bed 3 hours prior.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I probably just ate something bad." She reached for her toothbrush as she looked in the mirror. She was pale, a little too pale, and looked dreadfully tired. After brushing her teeth she went and got back in bed with her boyfriend. They slept for a while longer, finally waking up when Zane arrived.

"Are you two gonna sleep all day?" He poked his head in the door. David had been awake for about thirty minutes, but would rather stay with her for a while than go talk to all of his friends. He was also googling symptoms of pregnancy, and freaking himself out, and he didn't want his friends to notice.

"I'll be out in a minute, Zane." He replied, getting up to pee. The sound of the door shutting woke her up, and she realized how bad she really felt. This is usually how she would feel on her period, but her period stopped once she got on birth control.

She wrapped herself in a blanket and walked out into the living room. Carly, Zane, Jeff, and Joe were spread out across the living room. She sat in the LoveSac, checking her phone for the first time all day.

"Are you okay?" Carly asked her.

"Yeah, I just don't feel the best, but I'm fine." She smiled, trying to appear as if she felt okay.

"Do you want some breakfast? It'd help you to eat a little bit." Natalie popped out of the kitchen, bringing the smell of scrambled eggs with her. The smell of the eggs almost made y/n gag, but she held it together.

"Just some toast, if you don't mind. I've been craving toast for like three days." She smiled back. She contemplated getting up and puking again.

"You've been having cravings, too?" David didn't mean to let that slip out as he walked into the room.

"Doesn't everyone get cravings sometimes?" She tried to justify herself, understanding what he was implying.

"I'm just saying." He brought her a water bottle and a plate of toast with jam on it.

"Thank you." She tried to end the conversation. There was no way she was pregnant.

"Wait, do you think she-" Carly tried to ask, but y/n interrupted.

"I'm on birth control, I'm not pregnant." She was the first person to say the word out loud, making it sound a lot heavier.

"I don't know, this girl I went to high school with was on birth control, but she still got pregnant. She kept takin' the pills though, and she had a miscarraige." Jeff said.

"Oh my God, Jeff." Carly was freaked out by his story. Y/n was a lot more freaked out.

"Should I postmate a pregnancy test?" Zane asked. Her frustration was bubbling up inside of her.

"Can you all just stop! Goddamn." She stood up, putting the toast on the table and quickly making her way back to David's room. David grabbed the plate and followed closely behind, recognizing that he made a mistake by bringing it up.

"I'm sorry." He poked his head through the door as she lay face down on the bed. She sat up, ready to explode.

"Do you know how embarrassing it is for everybody to be guessing if you're pregnant? It's a conversation you and I need to have before you go guessing about it to our friends. I'm not pregnant, and even if I am I would want to tell everyone in a cute fun way and be happy about it, not miserable with morning sickness or whatever. Also, do you realize how fucking serious being pregnant is, David? You can't even take care of a goldfish, and you wanna raise a kid? Just leave me alone for a little bit." She laid back down, starting to cry. David thought to himself about mood swings, and rubbed her back with his hand as she cried. He hated seeing her like this.

"I'm sorry." He repeated himself. "Do you want me to go get a pregnancy test, to make sure?" His voice was quiet, he didn't wanna upset her even more.

"No, I'll go." She wiped her tears as she sat up and scooted off the bed.

"Can I come with you?" He asked, genuinely wanting to be there for her.

"No, David. I'm still mad at you." She walked into the bathroom and started the shower. "When was the last time we had sex, anyway? Like a week ago right? I wouldn't have symptoms that fast." She stripped her clothes off.

"Okay but we also had sex about a month ago, don't you start getting symptoms at a month?" He reminded her, subtly admiring her body.

"Yeah, I guess so." She hopped in the shower as David walked out of the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

Once she was clean and dressed, she grabbed her wallet and phone and went to find Natalie. She peaked into Nat's room and saw her there, typing away on her laptop.

"Hey, will you come with me to CVS?" She asked. Natalie smiled back at her and nodded, grabbing her shoes and her keys.

The two girls walked out into the living room, ignoring everyone as they left the house. They got in Nat's Mercedez and headed off to the drugstore. Y/n couldn't help but feel nauseous on the ride over.

"Are you sure you're not pregnant?" Natalie asked her.

"No, that's why we're going to get the test, but I really don't think I am." She explained to her friend as they pulled into the parking lot. They walked inside, and y/n immediately noticed there was a minute clinic.

"I should go see if anyone's there, maybe I just have a stomach bug or something." They headed towards the little clinic and filled out the survey you have to take before seeing somebody.

"I never knew these places were so fancy, they have, like, examination rooms and everything." Natalie commented, sitting down on a bench.

"Y/n?" A doctor stuck her head out the door of the little examination room. Y/n stood and walked into the room, leaving Natalie outside. After about fifteen minutes, she walked out of the room with some papers in her hands.

"So?" Natalie asked, standing up and putting her phone in her pocket.

Back at David's house, they filmed little bits, but everyone kept talking about the fact that y/n might be pregnant. It had also come up in one of the groupchats, the rumor spreading to the rest of the vlog squad.

David was more anxious than usual. The thing she said earlier about him not even being able to care for a fish really struck a chord with him. How would he be able to take care of a human child? He would learn though. He's always wanted to be a dad. The door opened and he immediately ran to her.

"Did you take a test yet?" He looked at the plastic CVS bag in her hands.

"No." She walked past him, just pretending to be pissed now that she had devised a plan. She and Natalie went into Nat's bedroom and locked the door. Everyone stood outside the door, trying to hear what they were discussing. The two girls made their way into Natalie's bathroom, stifling their words as much as they could. Natalie took the false positive pregnancy test out of its package, and y/n took the medicine for the small stomach bug she had, doing anything to make everyone else believe they were waiting the full 3 minutes for the test.

"I'm glad you're not pregnant, I would probably have to move out so you could turn my room into a nursery." Natalie whispered. Y/n flushed the toilet, covering her laughter with the sound of rushing water.

After three more agonizing minutes, the girls finally opened the bedroom door, watching everyone pretend they weren't standing there waiting for it to open.

"David, can I talk to you?" She held the fake pregnancy test in one hand, and pulled David into his bedroom with the other. "Close your eyes and hold out your hands." The couple sat on the bed.

"I know you have a pregnancy test, why do I need to close my eyes?" David questioned.

"Okay fine, whatever." She tossed the test at his chest, smiling as he read it.

"Holy shit. Holy shit!" He hugged her really tight, unable to comprehend his excitement. He knew it would be a big responsibility, but he thought he could handle it.

"Oh, I wouldn't get too close to me." She pushed David off of her.

"Why?" He questioned her, wondering what she meant.

"Because the stomach bug I have is probably contagious." She watched his face drop as he understood.

"So you're not pregnant?" He felt a deep sadness in his chest. Tears welled in his eyes.

"No. I wanted to teach you a lesson. Now you get to go tell all of our friends that I'm not pregnant, and that you got them all excited because you're an idiot." She felt a pain in her heart, its not like she knew he would be so sad. She thought he didn't want a kid. But she also couldn't watch her beautiful boyfriend cry. "And then when I feel better, we can make a real baby, and keep it between us, and film everybody's reactions, and use it for clickbait even though it won't be clickbait."

David smiled at the end, a tear rolling down his face. "Can we make it a little Clickbait onesie?" A soft chuckle escaped his lips.

"Yes, we can make it a little Clickbait onesie."

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you have a funny last name? Does anyone make fun of it? No, I love my last name. I’ve been told by some people throughout my life that it’s a cool last name. What did you eat for dinner last night, if anything? Was it good or bad? We had meatball sliders, which are meatballs on sweet Hawaiian rolls. SO good.  Have you ever told someone, besides family, that you love them and meant it? No. Has anyone ever called your personality dull? Do you agree with them? lol no, but I’m sure they thought it. I think it is. I’m boring and lame. Are the blankets that are on your bed now made by someone you know in life? The quilt I have on it was made by a friend of my grandma when I was a kid. 

Would you ever have a child just to get someone to fall in love with you? Wow, absolutely not. Children are not pawns or objects. That also doesn’t work.  Who was the last person to call you? How long did you two talk? My mom earlier. It was just a quick phone call, like 2 minutes.  Can you tell when people are lying or telling the truth? Usually. Ever have a drug overdose? What did you OD on exactly? No. Do you treat others as you’d like to be treated? Have you always? I try to. Do you ever look in the mirror and name all of your flaws for no reason? Oh god. That’s why I avoid looking at myself in the mirror unless I need to and when I do, I use it for that specific purpose and don’t spend any more time than I need to. I avoid the mirror as much as possible. If I do that, I most definitely see all my flaws and they seem more intensified and magnified and yeah.  The most painful medical procedure you’ve ever had? All the surgeries I’ve had. Have you ever personally witnessed a drug deal before? Yes. Have you ever been pulled over by the cops for speeding? No. I don’t drive. Do you know how wide your hips are in exact inches, or not? No. Have you ever met someone in person that you met online? Nope. Do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time? People do tend to throw terms like that around and yeah it’s not cool. It’s a very real thing for people. Ever have an ultra-sound performed on you? What was it for? Yeah, several. I used to get my kidneys and bladder function checked once a year. I haven’t had it done since I was 21 and was given the boot from the children’s hospital I saw the same doctor at ever since my accident at 7 months old.  Where is somewhere you’re excited to go in the next few days? I’m not going anywhere in the next few days. What color is your digital camera, if you have one? I have a pink digital camera tucked away in a drawer that I haven’t used since like... 2008. What time is it where you are currently? 1:22PM. Have you got any half or step siblings? Half, but we’ve never referred to each other as such. When was the last time you had wet hair? Last night. Do you like kids’ movies? Yeah, some. When was the last time you were sick and what illness did you have? I had some weird stomach virus 3 weeks ago. I always feel crappy in some way or another, though. When did you last wash your hair? Last night. Have you ever been kicked out of somewhere? No. Who did you last speak aloud to and what did you say? My brother. He asked if I gave our doggo her vitamins, yet, to which I said, “No.” Do you have any homework to do? No. I’m forever done with school. No homework ever again. Have you ever been to Manhattan? Nope. Did you get swine flu? No. Do you know anyone from Alabama? No. How bright is it in the room you’re in? Bright enough. What can you smell right now? Nothing. Are there any teachers that simply hate you? No, teachers loved me. Have you ever bought a game from a site like Big Fish Games or Shockwave? Yeah. I played a lot of their murder mystery/hidden object games on my phone. What were you last at the doctor for? I see this doctor every 2-3 weeks for the management and care of an ongoing thing.  Have you seen all the Lord of the Rings movies? I haven’t seen any of them. I’ve never had any desire to. What is the strangest food combination that you enjoyed as a young child? People always think I'm weird for liking mustard in my mashed potatoes, but HAVE YOU HAD IT? No! Its the best. <<< I haven’t had that, but I do enjoy mustard with tater tots, so I probably would like it.  How often do you change your underwear? Daily. Have you ever had to call the cops on someone else before? Yes. What kind of phone do you have? iPhone XR. How’s the weather? Hot and miserable. Today is the 1st day of summer and also the longest day of the year... D: D: D:

[arrhostia]

what is the extent of will's powers? what are his strengths / weaknesses?

First of all: Bless you for this question?? Because damn my friend, this is something I love talking about.

So, first of all, it’s important to mention that Will generally got powers related to sicknesses due to Apollo also being the God of plague (and also me being Extra™). This is, however, still combined with healing powers.

1) Audiokinesis. For Will specifically, this means he can make a sharp whistle-like sound that stuns his opponent.

2) Archery. He’s decent at it, but by far not as good as his siblings are. In fact, if you were judging him solely based on his archery skills, you wouldn’t guess he’s a son of Apollo at all; he merely appears to be a demigod who can handle a bow.

3) Musical aptitude. He’s great at playing the ukulele, which he did have to practise – it just didn’t take him as long as a normal human’s practising. He hasn’t mastered another instrument, and he is a horrible singer.

4) Cuplets Curse. He can curse people to only speak in rhymes, which usually takes a few days to wear off. In some cases (meaning if he really wants to do it and hasn’t used other powers lately), it can even take a few weeks to wear off.

5) Disease control. All of his other powers are tied to disease. Those are the following:

When touching a person, Will is capable of figuring out what kind of illness or natural poisoning (caused by plants or the bite of some animal) said person is suffering from. While he cannot heal them just like that, he can at least figure out what medicine or antidote can heal the person.

He can create already existing diseases in order to infect someone with them. He is also capable of manipulating the stage of the disease and how strongly affected the person is. This usually allows him to weaken an opponent who is much stronger than he is.

The same thing applies to allergies. While he can technically make someone allergic to basically anything at all, he usually uses this against opponents as well (or a friend who annoyed him) as a distraction. By making the person allergic to something close to them (e.g. strawberries when they are close to the strawberry field), the magic is easier to do and less exhausting for Will.

He tends to feel whether someone he meets is suffering or will be suffering from a chronic illness, though he cannot figure out what exactly it will be.

He can transfer a disease from one person to another, which however does not automatically heal the first person. In fact, in changes absolutely nothing about their condition at all and only makes the second person miserable as well.

Will usually needs to be as close as possible to the person he infects with a disease. However, he can also use an arrow, infecting its head so that the disease will be passed on to its target the moment it hits.

Something that Will considers his biggest weakness is the fact that he cannot magically heal someone like his siblings tend to be able to. Instead, he has to rely on the very same things which a mortal could do as well. If he tried to use magical healing, he would, in fact, make the illness even worse than it was before. He had to find out about that the hard way when he’d tried to cure his mother’s flu and failed horribly.

Another weakness is the fact that he relies way too much on his daily meditation. While it clearly was helpful in the beginning in order to learn how to deal with his powers, it has reached the point of him being incapable of controlling them properly without that. This usually isn’t an issue, but can turn incredibly dangerous during a battle when there is no time for meditating.

And then there is his fatal flaw, which is his love for his friends and family. If something happens to someone he cares about, he immediately loses his usually sunny disposition and turns against the enemy with everything that he’s got, using his disease-based powers in ways that are incredibly dangerous and affect not only the enemy, but everyone else around as well.

[mystrade-valentines]

Mystrade Valentine’s Plots, looking for loving owners!

These ideas are all in need of a home - claim them, change them, twist them, make them your own. A lot of them are open-ended, and would turn out very differently in different hands. But if you get your heart set on one and want to reserve it, let @mottlemoth know and I’ll take it down. <3 

(Or if you’ve already had the idea independently, just give me a yell.)

I’ve split them into two main categories (fluffier and lighter, vs. plots with a little more angst) but you could flip a lot of them very easily. There’s also a small handful of AUs at the bottom, and some history bits.

If anyone has an excess of ideas to share, do send them this way and I’ll add them.

Separate post coming with song/music prompts. Oh, and if there’s time, I might make a dialogue challenge list. Suggestions eagerly welcomed.

Enjoy! <3

FLUFF, FUN & LIGHTER

After his divorce, Greg really isn't in the mood for Valentine's Day. He wishes there was some kind of Miserable Old Bugger's Day alternative, where you could sit and get drunk with someone as cynical and world-weary as you are. Then he gets called to The Diogenes to discuss Sherlock's latest endeavours, and his wish comes true.

Mycroft Holmes arrives at Baker Street as a client. He's received an unsolicited communication of a personal nature, and needs to know who it is. Sherlock gladly accepts The Case of the Mysterious Valentine's Card.

Anthea is tired of witnessing her boss's overwhelming crush on the police inspector who looks out for his brother. She's well aware that Mycroft will never do a thing on his own, and decides enough is enough. Meanwhile, Sally Donovan is tired of seeing Greg go quiet and shifty whenever Sherlock Holmes's older brother enters the room. She decides Greg deserves to be happy, and sets out to kick things into motion.

It's been a weird February for Greg. He's just met a man called Sherlock Holmes, who solved an unsolvable case within minutes - and seems to be a pretty likeable guy, if not great at taking care of himself. Then on February 14th, a black stretch limo arrives to collect Greg after work - he's got a date in an industrial warehouse with a protective older brother.

Sherlock needs to infiltrate a swanky masquerade ball being attended by London's rich and famous on Valentine's Day. John has inconveniently developed flu; Sherlock needs a last-minute assistant. Greg's pretty sure he's going to regret this decision to help - until he lay eyes on the tall handsome stranger in the fox mask, and the evening takes an unexpected twist.

[claimed by phantomlove908] Greg and Mycroft broke up last year. Secretly, they're missing each other badly - but it's Valentine's Day, effort should be made, and they both find themselves with dates. At the same romantic restaurant. At the same time. At neighbouring tables.

Once again, Mycroft's courage failed him in the run-up to Valentine's Day. Once again, he did not ask Greg Lestrade for his company. Instead, he gets to watch like a hawk on CCTV as Greg takes someone else around the town. Then the idea to intervene arises. Watching from miles away in his pyjamas, Mycroft sets about orchestrating The Worst Date In History. (Optional twist: Greg quickly realises what's going on. Another option: Greg set up the whole thing to make Mycroft jealous. His date is in on the act, and plays along.)

Last year, Mycroft's expensive Valentine's presents rather backfired. He learned that Greg Lestrade doesn't really want to be spoiled with gifts that cost more than his car. This year, Mycroft sets out to make something instead.

Mycroft Holmes discovers (and is appalled by) the concept of pick-up lines. Greg sets out to prove to his friend that they work. Persistence and creativity are key.

Mycroft and Greg spice up a boring Valentine's Day at work by sharing progressively steamy texts. Greg's pretty sure that Mycroft will hit boiling point before he does. Mycroft begs to differ.

Greg's divorce came through two years ago. Since then, he's struggled to get a second date with anyone. It's almost as if some mysterious powerful figure is intervening and scaring them off...

Greg and Mycroft got together on February 1st. Their relationship is only two weeks old, and neither are ready for all the pressure of gifts and cards and restaurants. They decide to have a quiet meal at Greg's flat - and Greg is ready to impress with his culinary skills.

Mycroft/Greg's plans to propose on Valentine's Day fall from one flaming disaster to the next. (Ideas: the string quartet go to the wrong restaurant; the restaurant have double-booked their table; a crying baby seated directly beside them; a waiter spills something on Mycroft’s suit; Greg’s food is over-spiced and he chokes; at just the right moment, someone else proposes across the restaurant; and we will all love you forever if someone accidentally eats the sneaky-in-the-dessert ring.)

After many years together, Greg or Mycroft decides to recreate their first ever date for Valentine's - down to the very last detail.

MORE ANGST & HURT/COMFORT

After a few years together, it's been easy to let the magic slip in the Holmes-Lestrade marriage. Last year, they barely did a thing for Valentine's Day. This year, when the day arrives and goes unmarked, Greg/Mycroft finds himself more hurt than he expected. (Angst it up: both of them are hurt, but they each think they're the only one.)

In the run-up to Valentine's Day, the separation of a couple close to Greg and Mycroft reminds them that acts of romance are important - even if it seems silly, if work is busy, or you don't feel it. (Angst it up: their partner disagrees, and so does work.)

Greg and Mycroft broke up last year. Faced with Valentine's Day alone, Greg decides to make one last play for the guy he can't forget - and he's pulling out all the stops. (Angst it up: Mycroft has a new partner that Greg didn't know about.)

Mycroft didn't ever mean to be a mistress - but Greg Lestrade is magnificent, even if he's married. Greg's toxic marriage is the source of all his pain. Mycroft is desperate for him to realise it, and break free. Valentine's Day brings things to a head. (Angst it up: Greg is spending the evening with his wife.)

Mycroft and Greg's adopted daughter is sixteen now. She's dumped by her unworthy boyfriend the day before Valentine's Day. Her fathers give up their Valentine's evening to comfort her, and share their advice when it comes to broken hearts.

It was on Valentine's Day that Greg discovered his ex-wife's infidelity. He's never been at ease at this time of year, and so Mycroft has never had a proper Valentine's with his partner. He's realising he would like one. Whether Greg can overcome his old wounds is another issue.

A few months ago, Greg and Mycroft decided there’s no reason two single workaholics can’t have some fun together - no romance allowed. But now Valentine's Day is approaching, and it's about to get awkward. (Fluff it up: love crept in, and they feel the same way. Angst central: someone's about to get seriously hurt.)

Mycroft has a secret. He signed up to a pen-friend scheme years ago, offering support for professional gay men, and he and his anonymous partner have traded hand-written letters back and forth ever since. They fell in love some time ago, though they've never met - too scared to risk the quiet, comfortable bond that they both rely on so heavily in their lives. His partner's letters have often been Mycroft's only emotional outlet. Following the turmoil of S4, he decides that life is to be lived and he wants to risk a chance at happiness. They agree to meet at last - on Valentine's Day, in a Mayfair restaurant.

Mycroft is away working for Valentine's Day. His new boyfriend has started to worry their relationship will always be like this. Then Greg wakes up to a letter sent special delivery from halfway across the world.

AUs

Greg Lestrade is the modern Cupid. It's the whole point of his existence to bring people together in love, and Valentine's Day is his biggest gig of the year. But this year, it's Greg's turn to fall in love. (Optional Johnlock idea; he's been working on them for a couple of years, but the gorgeous older brother is distracting him out of his head. Or alternate plot; he's been trying to find Mycroft Holmes someone for years now, but Mycroft keeps rejecting them all. Greg decides just to ask the tragic bastard what he wants.)

The Valentine's Thief has struck a different major gallery on the same day for six years now. He steals a romantic artwork on February 14th every year, leaving no trace behind him - only headlines. Greg Lestrade, Head of Security at a previously unhit gallery, is seriously concerned about a painting in their collection. It's the next natural choice to be targeted. The other galleries might have failed to catch the Valentine's Thief - but Greg is determined his patch won't be next.

Soulmate Compass AU. Everyone receives a compass at birth; it will lead them to the person meant for them. Mycroft realised years ago that his person moves around a lot. He's given up on chasing them, and thrown himself into his work instead. Over the course of this year though, it seems like his soulmate is only heading in one direction - towards him. It's now Valentine's Day, and the needle is freaking out. His soulmate is close. But is Mycroft ready?

HISTORY THOUGHTS

Valentine's Day originates in the ancient Roman fertility festival of Lupercalia. Its rites and rituals were a great deal darker than our modern day celebrations. (I can’t even suggest a plot for this. But if you can do it, I will applaud you until my hands hurt.)

The feast day of Saint Valentine first became associated with romantic love in the fourteenth-century, when it was believed that birds choose their mates in mid-February.

Valentine's Day was huge in Victorian Britain. This five-minute history article is great, with lots of images of original cards and the kind of thing that would be written in them. ("I think of you with inexpressible delight...") If you fancy a go at a seriously sentimental Victorian Mystrade AU, this might be a great chance.

[burning-up-ao3]

NEWARK, N.J. — While on a five-day trip to Jackson Hole, Wyo. during the Penguins’ bye week late last month, Sidney Crosby began to feel something he had not felt in years, since the most recent NHL lockout in 2004-05.

On the second-to-last day of what was supposed to be an enjoyable vacation, the Penguins captain wound up a couple thousand miles away from either of his two homes, miserable and sick, unable to do much of anything.

“You get used to having to play through colds and stuff like that,” Crosby said. “People go to work with them. It’s a part of life. But sometimes it stops you in your tracks like that. There’s nothing you can do.”

What Crosby went through is common for NHL players, who are constantly shuttling on and off airplanes, checking in and out of hotels and entering and leaving (entirely too) cold buildings, all during the darkest days of winter.

Ron CookRon Cook: Evgeni Malkin may be ready to break out of long slump

No matter how many vitamins they take or calcium they consume, they’re inevitably going to get sick. Sometimes it might get ugly. And they’re well aware that sick days are almost never an option.

Which means that Crosby, given what he contracted, was actually one of the lucky ones, in that he could rest some. More often than probably anyone realizes, NHL players have to play through some ugly stuff, flu bugs and stomach illnesses the public never hears about.

“It happens every winter, where half the team gets sick,” Matt Cullen said. “The training room is busy. Guys are looking for anything to help them get over the hump so they can feel well enough to play.

“It’s why you try so hard to take care of what you can control. You’re getting your sleep and fluids because it [stinks] as a player when you’re sick. You have to play regardless.

“You see it every once in a while, when guys are throwing up in the bathroom during warmup or between periods. I’ve had teammates run off the bench. It’s part of the deal.”

2. And when it happens on the road, Bryan Rust said, there’s nothing worse.

“It’s miserable,” Rust said. “It’s kind of a helpless feeling; it’s not like you’re in your own bed, and you can rely on someone.

Matt VenselPenguins blue line hopes to keep up its contributions on offense

“You also feel bad for the maids who have to come in there afterward and clean up.”

It’s a feeling Rust knows well, too. He said he was knock-down, drag-out sick twice: once in college at Notre Dame and another time during the early days of his Penguins career.

What does the versatile winger do when it happens?

“Lie in bed, turn the lights off, close the shades,” Rust said. “And hope it goes away as fast as possible.”

3. It was a funny topic to take around the Penguins dressing room: Have you ever been sick on the road?

Those who hadn’t, immediately found some wood on which to knock. Those who had, launched into some humorous tales.

In 2013, Olli Maatta was playing for Finland at the World Junior Championship in Ufa, Russia. Maatta thought he ate something funky, food that was potentially undercooked. The next few days were brutal.

“Not the best thing that ever happened,” Maatta said with a smile. “Although being stuck in my room and trying to watch whatever it was on Russian TV might’ve been the worst thing.”

4. Before he was traded, Riley Sheahan told me a good one about when he was with the Detroit Red Wings a couple years ago. He vacationed in Mexico during the All-Star break and brought back a little present.

“I caught a virus or something,” Sheahan said. “I was sick for like five weeks. I actually had to miss a game, on the Moms’ trip, in Florida. It wasn’t fun.”

Garrett Wilson was a proud member of the knock-on-wood club. Despite playing for San Antonio in the AHL — where they’d have to leave for a month every winter because the rodeo came to town — Wilson has never been sick on the road.

“I don’t puke too often, either,” Wilson said. “Even drinking or anything, I don’t puke. Pretty lucky that way.”

Wilson said he did play with a guy — John McFarland, in the Florida Panthers system — who didn’t feel right until he forced himself to vomit before a game, although that wasn’t related to being sick.

“You definitely hear the odd time a guy is hurling in the bathroom before a game, whether they’re sick or nervous,” Wilson said. “It almost makes you sick hearing it.”

5. Whether or not it’s better to get sick in a hotel room versus at home sparked a lively debate. Matt Murray is all for the road option.

“I think a hotel room is a good place to be,” Murray said before taking his knuckles to his dressing room stall. “You’re not bugging your family or anything like that. You get to sleep it off.”

Wilson agreed.

“I don’t think it’s too bad on the road,” Wilson said. “You’re with the trainers all the time. They’re usually at the same hotel. If you do get really sick, they’re just a text or phone call away.”

6. My personal opinion: These guys are nuts. It’s much worse to be sick in a hotel, with none of the comforts of home.

It happened to me recently, too, around the same time as Crosby. In San Jose, Calif. for the NHL All-Star Game, I literally could not stand at Media Day because I was dizzy and nauseous.

Eventually, with neither Crosby nor Letang there, I decided to cut bait take an Uber back to my hotel room — backpack open the entire way, praying there were no issues.

Yada, yada, yada … the next 24 hours were not fun.

“Hotel room, being stuck in a little space there, it’s terrible,” Maatta (correctly) said.

7. Back to the war stories, though, which turned out to be my favorite part of reporting this.

In Wilkes-Barre/Scranton, Rust’s next-door neighbor in the dressing room was former Penguins prospect Jayson Megna.

“One game, between periods, he was hugging a trash can,” Rust said. “On the bench, same thing. It was impressive to see him play through it. I don’t think I would have been able to. It was pretty wild.”

Penguins coach Mike Sullivan experienced the same thing when he played for the Calgary Flames.

“I had the flu,” Sullivan recalled. “Played through it to the point where I was throwing up between periods, and they had to put an IV in me to replace all the fluids I had lost. That was the hardest one from a personal standpoint.”

8. When he was with Minnesota — the first time — Cullen once played with walking pneumonia. To conserve as much energy as possible, Cullen skipped the morning skate and stayed home basically until puck drop.

With the Wild apparently short on players and unable to make a roster move in time, Cullen said there wasn’t another option.

“That was a tough one, running to the bathroom between periods,” Cullen said. “We were in a pinch. Just had to do it.”

Being able to rely on a routine, Cullen said, does help.

“It helps to normalize everything even if you feel terrible,” Cullen said. “You get out and do warmup, get some blood flowing, you’re out in front of the fans, it gives you some adrenaline. But after the game, you feel it.”

9. Tanner Pearson had some good perspective on the matter because he nearly wound up disgustingly sick on the road while with the Kings last February.

Los Angeles had arrived home from a four-game road trip that actually included its annual Dads’ trip — maybe we should blame the parents? — when Pearson started to feel dizzy and nauseous.

“I don’t know if it was something I ate on the plane or what,” Pearson said. “Just hit me like a ton of bricks. We landed, and that was the end of me.”

But there was the benefit, Pearson said, of making it home. He could sleep in his own bed. His wife was there. At least he wasn’t in a hotel room.

“I see guys who are sick on the road,” Pearson said, “and it looks like pure torture.”

10. It can also be downright scary.

Marcus Pettersson had a couple stories, one funny, the other not so much. The first was the 2016 World Junior Championship, in Helsinki, Finland. A couple of Pettersson’s teammates contracted the stomach flu.

“It’s crazy how quickly something like that can spread,” Pettersson said. “You just have to isolate yourself.”

Pettersson also heard a story about Detroit defenseman Jonathan Ericsson’s brother, Jimmie, when he was playing with SKA Saint Petersburg of the KHL in 2014-15. When Jimmie Ericsson told the team’s doctors he didn’t feel well, they treated it like some sort of illness — but never checked anything else.

Turns out Ericsson had a partially ruptured spleen, which they only discovered upon returning home.

“They just thought he was sick,” Pettersson said. “He got medicine shots in his [butt]. They said, ‘You’re good. You can play.’ It was crazy.”

11. The Penguins would never allow something like that to happen.

Sullivan explained the lengths to which the team goes to try and stack the odds in their favor, all while realizing that sickness during a winter sport are pretty much inevitable.

On the road, the Penguins will ensure that sick players get their own rooms, Sullivan said. They also get their own water bottles on the bench, the equipment staff will wash and sanitize things even more than they already do, and Sullivan has no problem sending a guy home if he’s sick.

“It’s difficult when you’re in close quarters like this,” Sullivan said. “But we do everything within our power to see if we can’t contain it when those types of things arise.”

12. Wanted to close with this anecdote from Crosby on not participating in the NHL All-Star Skills Competition when he was probably extremely contagious. Made me laugh, anyway.

“The last thing I wanted to do was get everyone sick. That’s all I need,” Crosby said before cracking a smile. “Of course, I guess it was our division … “

13. Moving on …

The more I think about it, Carl Hagelin would be a perfect fit for the Penguins at the NHL trade deadline, provided they can convince the Los Angeles Kings or or someone else to take Pearson.

Small problem: The deal actually isn’t possible.

I didn’t learn this until recently, and I’m guessing you didn’t know it, either. It’s a CBA quirk that’s actually pretty dumb, in my opinion.

Once a team retains salary in a trade — the Penguins retained $250,000 — they can’t reacquire that player for a minimum of one year after the transaction or until the player's contract expires or is terminated prior to the one-year date.

It’s a shame, too, because I think Hagelin would’ve been worth checking on.

For his penalty killing (Penguins are just 25 for their last 36, 69.4 percent), Hagelin’s fit with Evgeni Malkin and what Hagelin could potentially do for good friend Patric Hornqvist, who doesn’t have a point in 12 games.

14. As for what the Penguins could realistically do, I’m not in favor of anything big. Maybe add a depth forward or defenseman, depending on who’s out there.

But at some point, this group should be allowed to actually play together for a stretch, and we’re running out of time for that to happen.

Many of you have suggested a 1a goalie type as well. There’s a variety of problems with this. One, cost. That guy wouldn’t come cheap, if he was worth anything. Two, what do you do with Casey DeSmith? Three, how does that play with Murray?

I know he’s been hurt a lot, but I can’t imagine that would go over well. Murray is your No. 1. You paid DeSmith to be your backup. Hold onto Tristan Jarry. I’d stick with that.

15. Without Hagelin, I’m curious to see where this goes with Zach Aston-Reese alongside Malkin and Phil Kessel. It’s a tremendous opportunity for him and one for which he’s actually well-suited.

“Any time you can stay on your natural side, it’s a little bit easier,” Aston-Reese said after Sunday’s 6-5 victory over the New York Rangers. “Phil kind of has that signature shot, too, coming down on his strong side. I like to work hard defensively. It’s definitely nice to balance out those two.”

I like Aston-Reese as a lot, as a player and person. He’s extremely smart, quotable and great to deal with from our perspective. If we were ranking most media-friendly players in the Penguins dressing room, he’d surely be up there.

But hockey-wise, he’s going to make a lot of people happy if he’s able to blend some physicality with offense and a willingness to play defense. He’s still rounding out his game in a few different ways, but I think the Penguins definitely got a good one here.

16. It’s obvious — and Post-Gazette columnist Ron Cook wrote this off of Sunday’s game — but the Penguins need to get Hornqvist going. How do they do that?

I see two options. One, I’d consider playing Hornqvist with Sidney Crosby. Nothing against Rust. He’s been great there. But they need more out of Hornqvist.

My second possible solution would be trying Kessel on the third line with Nick Bjugstad — they had some chemistry — and using Hornqvist with Malkin, a situation where the feisty Swede thrived last season.

I hate Hornqvist in the bottom-six, as I’ve never seen his production give the Penguins a competitive advantage in that spot the way Kessel’s has at various times throughout his Penguins tenure.

17. This won’t be a popular opinion, but I’ve actually liked Jack Johnson on his natural left side the past couple of games.

I know what the goals-for numbers are — they’re awful — and I know how Johnson is perceived by the fan base. But if Rutherford or Sullivan are frustrated with Johnson’s play this season, they’re doing one heck of a job hiding it.

Whether you want to admit it or not, Johnson won’t be a healthy scratch. And what I’ve seen the past couple of games — Johnson’s been with Juuso Riikola with one and Justin Schultz for two — has actually been pretty decent.

18. Shut up, Don Cherry. Can we all agree on that?

He scolded the Carolina Hurricanes for, of all things, having fun. I hate giving this any airspace whatsoever, so I’m going to twist it another way: Forget about Dino Don and think of this from a Hurricanes perspective.

Great organization. Great city. A lot of fun to watch. If this gets their fans excited, my goodness, go for it. I think it’s tremendous. And I love seeing the Old (Canadian) Guard get upset over it.

19. Stat of the week: 12

That’s the number of points for Pettersson since the Dec. 3 trade that brought him to Pittsburgh. It’s also one less than Daniel Sprong has during that same stretch.

20. Non-hockey thought of the week: Apparently MLB commissioner Rob Manfred thinks we’re all stupid. Did you see this story from the Post-Gazette’s new baseball writer, Nubyjas Wilborn? Two quotes struck me.

“This narrative that our teams aren’t trying is just not supported by the facts. Our teams are trying. Every single one of them wants to win.”

Yes, they are trying, and they do want to win. I don’t doubt that the Pirates try and prefer winning to losing. But I could race Usain Bolt, and I’d still try. I’d still want to win. The problem is that I would not have taken the requisite steps to do so.

Then this gem: “I reject the notion that payroll is a good measure for how hard a team is trying or how successful that team is going to be.”

There are certainly outliers here: small-market teams that compete and big spenders that don’t. But the two teams in the World Series last year spent the most. Generally if you’re actually paying to play, you have a chance.

The only thing I hate more than baseball’s financial structure is when people in positions of power try to sell us this garbage.

Jason Mackey: jmackey@post-gazette.com and Twitter @JMackeyPG.