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svampira · 1 year ago

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🎯✂️🧠 per eden elias e brooklyn tripla combo

ask game

🎯 -What do they do best?

Elias, in spite of his horrible rancid personality, can be extremely charming when he needs to be, and his presence powers are op enough to be basically mind control at that point. <this does get him in trouble just as much as it gets him out of it. Physically he's very strong, but he only has 3 dots of melee and no combat disciplines, so he's kind of a flop for a vampire. When it comes to human abilities that carried off into his unlife, he's a great musician but that barely comes up and it's not why he was embraced.

Brooke can see the future👍🙏 she has way more control over her visions than the average malkavian, and her auspex in general is op as well because i love to cheat. Physically she's an extremely skilled acrobat, she was a gymnast her whole life and had just started teaching gymnastics before she died. She kills you then cartwheels out of the room🤸‍♀️

Eden's a sneaky guy👍 he can sneak in and out of somewhere without anyone noticing, eavesdrop on anyone and sneak out of most dangerous situations without having to resort to a fight (which he probably wouldn't win). He can hack anything 90s movies style but i literally don't know anything about that so im going to shut up

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

Elias' worst memory is his "first" day on this green beautiful earth👍i have a lot of thoughts on memory loss in general i don't think he just blacked out and instantly knew he had no memories it was more of a gradual panicking. Not recognising who the man in front of him was even though it felt like he should have, to slowly realising he doesnt remember his own name and all of his memories are gone > and not even getting 5 minutes to deal with it before the stranger forces him to drink his blood then subsequently drains him. Just a shitty first night😔 hes not the kind of guy that dwells on things though by the time he woke up his sire had been executed so he just pretends he's fine with the whole thing

[This got way too long so im putting the second part under the cut. Read my oc's villain origin story👇👇]

For Brooke i think it was a specific moment when she was around 16 and realised she had no shot of making it as a professional athlete, both because she was being overlooked by her coaches and because she kind of shot up to 1.75m all of a sudden (now idk a lot about gymnastics. But ive never seen anyone in the olympics that was taller than 1.50m). That's genuinely her villain origin story just a chaotic ball of repressed anger, bitterness and dissatisfaction that she carried over into her adult life and turned her into the gotham villain she's now. Her real name isn't even (obv) brooklyn it's literally her villain name LMFAO i just realised

For Eden i think it was the moment he realised Brooklyn WAS real. She spent the better part of the first year they were turned trying to convince him they had a fight club situation going on. I think he found the idea of brooke being a fragment of his imagination more comforting than anything else, especially since it's not very uncommon for the type of vampire him and brooke are to have delusions/strange manifestations of their powers. He found out he was 90% less insane than he initially thought he was but it still made him trust himself way less + he was "forced" into hating brooklyn now for what she'd done even though she's his only link to his human life and still cared about her. Now im just feeling bad MAN im drawing him a better girlfriend

🧠 - What do you like most about the OC?

Elias is my fave i cant even lie at this point... i love that he's so pretty i love drawing him💖 writing wise I've talked about this before but i love evil characters that still kind of feel innocent in a way. Like he has no lived experiences before turning into a blood sucking monster and even though he can be cruel and horrible to both humans and people he actually cares about, it's almost like he's never really had a chance to be anything else. Your honour he's just like that. I also like that out of all my characters he's the silliest ^^ he doesn't take things too seriously he loves slacking off and doesn't know how to hold a grudge. Also boobs

When it comes to brooke I loooove evil characters all my ocs fucking SUCK and she's the absolute worst. She kicks puppies for fun she steals candy from babies she engages in emotional terrorism she loves scheming and plotting. Yet deep deep down even though she links Eden back to her bitterness and dissatisfaction with her old life she does genuinely love him, and does her best to look out for him even when she's tormenting him. Also i looove drawing her with new hair every time she's so fun + i have lots of horror illustration ideas when it comes to her and eden (brain courtesy of a STELLAR gift art i got during artfight)

For Eden I like that he's the only one who's trying to rise above his nature out of all my ocs (this obviouslydoesn't work out, but there was an attempt). He has the highest humanity out of all of them, he tries to avoid feeding directly from humans most of the time, and he's the only anarch (which means in the la of my oc canon he's basically opposed to every one of my ocs) . I loove that despite everything she puts him through he still loves brooklyn, but i also love love love that later on as the war between the camarilla and the anarchs worsens he starts legit trying to kill her (while she NEVER would. She did straight up torture him a couple times tho so there's no moral high ground). I love horribly dysfunctional relationships I'm weak for fucked up heterosexuals

#i need to start tagging ask games. but i wont #/elias #/brooklyn #/eden #ask #oc lore #brooklyn lore #eden lore #elias lore

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missymurphy1985 · 4 years ago

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Reminiscing

Warnings - tooth rotting fluff... And smut. Obvs. Bit of a Daddy Kink thrown in cuz why the hell not?

Taglist (message me to be added!)

@queenshelby @peakyscillian @ntmynouis @margoo0 @janelongxox @being-worthy

You sat in the large armchair, in the big bay window of your Dublin home, blanket over your legs, as you immersed yourself in the latest John Grisham novel. Your husband was out, dropping his sons off back at their mum's after spending the weekend with you. You couldn't help but pinch yourself on a regular basis. Gorgeous husband, amazing young stepsons, even Cillians ex-wife, Lisa, was someone you considered a close friend - the split had been amicable, and she'd encouraged her sons with Cillian to welcome you with open arms. You even met her for lunch a few times a month, much to Cillian's surprise. He was more concerned the two of you were comparing notes than anything else!

Hearing the front door open and close, he smiled as he re-entered the room. Leaning over to kiss your lips, he sank down onto the sofa and picked his own book up from the coffee table.

"How was Lisa?" You asked, taking a sip of your coffee.

"Good - she said she'd call you later, something about a girls night out next week."

"Sounds fun - I'm up for that." You nestled down snug in the chair and continued your chapter. You could feel his eyes looking your way, and smiled internally. You loved the way he just watched you when he thought you couldn't see.

The way your legs hung over the chair, blanket covering your lower half. He smiled, remembering the day you met at the aftershow party for his latest play in Dublin. He was hesitate to go, but the director had convinced him. You were the director, Enda Walsh's niece, and you'd gone along to support your uncle's latest stage production. You knew who Cillian was of course, not that it bothered you. Working as a stagehand part time at the theatre in your teens, you'd met plenty of famous people over the years and frankly most of them were arrogant idiots with egos the size of Jupiter. Cillian was different though. Down to earth, sweet, kind, normal. Neither of you particularly looking for love, but sometimes it happens in the most unlikely of places.

Flashback

"Cillian, this my niece y/n. Y/n, this is Cillian, the star of the show!" Enda introduced the two of you and Cillian smiled, leaning forward to embrace you softly and kiss your cheek.

"I've heard so much about you y/n, nice to put a face to the name." You couldn't help but feel butterflies looking into those blue eyes, and without you realising at the time, Cillian felt exactly the same about yours. You'd spent most of the evening from that point talking about the theatre and what you each loved about it - from the lighting and production side to the audience reactions during the live show itself. You'd seen Cillian in the show three times, you'd been mesmerised by his performance, but this was the first time you'd met him.

The music changed as the night was drawing to a close. A slower number, and the other cast members and production team all took their respective partners to the dance floor. You were both now sat pretty much alone - clearly the only single people in the room!

"Would you like to dance?" Cillian asked, sheepishly. It suddenly felt a little awkward. You looked at him surprised, but found yourself nodding as he offered you his hand and led you to the dance floor. You could feel your uncle's stare as Cillian placed one hand on your waist and took your hand with his other, both of you gently swaying to the music. He was a smooth dancer, never missing a step. No toes clashing together, and the awkwardness melted away as you looked into each others eyes. The rest of the room suddenly becoming an afterthought.

"I've really enjoyed talking to you tonight y/n."

"Me too, you're not like the other actors. You're... Normal!" You giggled lightly.

"I'm boring, you mean?" He laughed in response, you could feel his fingers caressing your waist softly as you continued to sway.

"How'd you feel about dinner one night? We can talk more about how boring we both are?" That smile again.

"You're on. He pulled you a little closer, your cheeks inches apart. He desperately wanted to kiss you there and then but with your uncle a mere few feet away he didn't dare. He knew you were 28 to his 40, and he wasn't sure how his friend would react to it.

"You two seemed to be getting on well?" Enda approached you after the party, and he couldn't help but notice the glow around you after your dance with Cillian. He'd gone to the bathroom.

"He's a nice guy Uncle E, we have a lot in common."

"You know he's 40, and has two kids, right?"

"Uncle -"

"Cillian! So you're taking my niece out for dinner are you?" He returned from the men's room and froze.

"Um.. I..."

"I'm kidding... God you're too easy to wind up!! Have fun!!" Both of you audibly sighed in relief.

"He's an ass..." You smiled as Cillian offered you his arm to link into.

"I have a car outside, I'll drop you home?" You nodded, taking his arm.

You both sat in the back, the driver being given your home address as Cillian pushed the visor up between the driver and you. Privacy. He took your hand, leaning back and kissed the back of it gently. You smiled - your first kiss, but not where you wanted it.

"He can't see us, right?" You asked. He nodded and pulled you closer to him. "So..." Leaning toward you slowly, he gently ran a thumb over your cheek and pressed his lips to yours. You returned the kiss. His mouth opening slightly to gain access to yours, your tongues soon met. It quickly became heated before Cillian pulled away.

"You wanna go home?"

"You want me to go home?"

"Nope."

"Then I'm not going home." Cillian pulled the visor down and told him you were both going back to his house instead before pulling you back against his lips.

****************************************

The memories of that first night were as clear as if it had happened only yesterday, not two years ago. It was so good that you both often got yourselves off to the thought of it when Cillian was away working. Two years on and your lives were simply idyllic.

He made his way over to you in the chair and kneeled down next to you, running a hand under your summer dress and squeezing your thigh.

"You know, I've been thinking..." He leaned closer to your ear, making you squirm. He knew the effect his voice had on you and he played on it daily.

"Dangerous..." You smirked, and he responded by tracing kisses up your back, his hand still teasing under your dress, over your now damp underwear.

"All this house.. and just the two of us.. seems a waste, don't you think?" His fingers gently moving your panties aside and slipping between your folds. Instinctively you opened your legs, granting him access.

"Hmmm....." Your hips rising slightly to meet his fingers. "Are you saying you want a dog, Cillian.."

"Funny, y/n... No.." his fingers were torturing you, caressing everywhere except where you needed him to be.

"Wanna fill me with your baby do you daddy?"

"Hmm.. call me that again..." He smiled, his erection now painfully pushing against his jeans as he dipped a finger inside you.

"Do we have a Daddy Kink, Cillian? Does making me full of your baby turn you on?" You tried to retain composure as a second finger entered you, his hand now pushing them in and out slowly.

"Fuck... Stand up." He ordered and he immediately pulled the dress over your head and your underwear down. Swiftly followed by his own clothing, before he lay you down on the sofa.

"Guess we won't be needing a condom for this then... Fuck me daddy - give me a baby..."

"Coming right up..." He kneeled back down next to you and parted your perfect legs, before sinking two fingers back inside, rubbing your clit with his thumb. It wasn't long before you were writhing under his touch, calling his name as you came hard against his hand. He moved over you, quickly turning you over so your pert behind was up in the air and you were gripping the arm of the sofa in hot anticipation. He pushed inside, feeling you for the first time without a barrier - no other contraception had suited you, so you'd stuck with condoms - and he groaned as he filled you completely.

"Jesus... God yes.. right there Daddy...." He picked up the pace at your words, thrusting into you like a man possessed.

"Fuck this is tight baby... I'm not gonna last long like this..."

"Fill me up Daddy.. make me pregnant.. give me your baby..." He couldn't hold back after that, and came hard, filling you and sending you into your second orgasm. Breathing heavy, he stayed in until he was completely spent - not daring to waste a drop.

"Lay on your back y/n... Legs in the air.." you did as he asked, confused. "Helps the whole process apparently."

"So you meant it then?" You smiled as he knelt beside you again, swirling a hand over your belly.

"What, that I want to see the love of my life's body swell with my baby inside? Damn right I meant it y/n.. nothing would make me happier than a baby with you." You were grinning now, as he leaned in to kiss you.

"Love you Cill."

"Love you more mama." The sound of him calling you that made your heart swell. You couldn't wait to hear your baby call it you too.

#cillian murphy #cillian smut #cillian murphy x reader #cillian x smut #cillian x fem!reader #cillian x daddy kink

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bittxrsweetsoph · 2 years ago

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Y'all I have a theory!

You know 007's OST - No time to die by Billie Eilish?

WHAT IF it was inspired by Goncharov? Okay I know it sounds crazy BUT HEAR ME OUT

*obvs this post contains spoilers from Goncharov (1973)*

Let's analyze the lyrics:

I should've known

I'd leave alone

Just goes to show

That the blood you bleed

Is just the blood you owe

At the very end of his life, Goncharov, on the floor and with his clothes soaked wet with his own blood, looks back. It's been a hell of a ride! He's won, he's failed, he got some friends on the road, and many enemies too. He realizes that, even though he's never been alone (Andrey, Katya, his cat, etc), the mobster's life is a lonely one. You can never be sure you're trusting the right person. And so there he is, dying alone, and his blood doesn't even impress him. He's already seen so much blood. He has killed, we know that much. Was it fair? Did those people deserve to die? Goncharov owes a debt, those people's families want him dead. Now he is.

It is implied in "faces from my past return, another lesson yet to learn" too, the faces of those he murdered. Every single one of their faces was carved into his memory; now he remembers. Now he gets to learn what they felt.

We were a pair

But I saw you there

Too much to bear

You were my life

But life is far away from fair

Was I stupid to love you?

Was I reckless to help?

Was it obvious to everybody else

That I'd fallen for a lie?

You were never on my side

Fool me once, fool me twice

This screams betrayal. Someone Goncharov loves betrays him. Is the song referring to Andrey or Katya? We don't know, but it kinda fits both of them. "Fool me once, fool me twice". Guess what! There were two big betrayals.

Katya's treason takes place on the final act, but there are some hints scattered throughout the entire movie. She loves her husband (she really does), they've been through a lot together. They care about each other. But sometimes love isn't enough. And in the end, Katya leaves. She runs away to Reykjavik, to start a new life, far away from danger and secrecy.

Andrey's betrayal is more striking, though. In a friendly or romantic way, we can't say. Anyway, since the beginning Goncharov and Andrey are thick as thieves (no pun intended,,, well, maybe). They're inseparable, they act as one single soul in two different bodies. They are partners in crime, the perfect tandem in Napoli, they complement each other. There are no secrets between them... Right?

It is first implied that Katya cheated on Goncharov with his best friend. Then, some lines in the fruit scene, the poker scene and Goncharov's death scene, also make us think there was more than friendship between both men (not confirmed by the writers, but yk it was the seventies). Goncharov has literally and figuratively fallen for a lie, as Andrey, his friend, companion, lover, soulmate, is the one who ultimately kills him and sees him fall to the ground, all signs of life disappearing.

Are you death or paradise?

Now you'll never see me cry

These verses could be linked to the homoerotic details and interpretations we are familiar with at this point (if you're not, I strongly recommend you go to ao3, there's gold in there). There are many religious references throughout the film. Goncharov and Katya, as well as Andrey, grew up in a religious environment. Yes, different religions, maybe, but the same concepts: honor, family, tradition. It's easy to imagine them having a significant faith crisis when they realised their feelings (Goncharov for Andrey, and Katia for Sofia). In the song, we can see the dichotomy: Goncharov wonders why loving Andrey should be bad if it feels so good. Katya looks at the apple that Sofia is holding, thinking to herself: maybe Eve accepting and eating the apple, falling into temptation, was an unknown door to a new paradise.

There's just no time to die

THE SIMBOLISM IN THIS FILM. It always comes back to time. We are running away from an enemy we can't win. Time will always catch us. We can't fight against time.

The characters continuously have this thought. "I'm running out of time". Goncharov himself speaks about how there isn't enough time in a day to fulfill his wants, to do everything he's planning, but he keeps procrastinating the vital stuff in life. It is only when he is bleeding out that he comes to the conclusion that none of the bills, jobs and arguments were important. They weren't worth it.

So yeah, that's pretty much it!

#goncharov #unreality #goncharov 1973 #katya goncharova #katya michailov #andrey daddano #andrey the banker #sofia #goncharov x katya #goncharov x andrey #katya x sofia #no time to die #billie eilish #seriously this is ridiculous #disclaimer billie i LOVE your music and this is just a silly little post PLEASE don't sue me #ao3

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zenosanalytic · 4 years ago

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Harrow the Ninth: Insanity, the Body, and Gideon Redux

Spoilers, Obvsl

While writing My Other Three Reaction Posts while reading this book, one thing I kept WANTING to do but kept stopping myself from doing was praise Muir’s treatment&presentation of psychosis. I THOUGHT that was what she was aiming for, but It’s a touchy subject and I worried about imparting motive to an author on it or misrepresenting my own experience or knowledge of it in doing so, so I kept deciding to Not. But then, In the Acknowledgements at the back, Muir touches, very briefly, on her own experiences in this regard so I now feel comfortable giving her treatment of the topic all the kudos I can. Her portrayal is affectingly Honest. The terror and shame of Harrow’s condition -the vulnerability which makes trust both an inescapable necessary and horrifying to offer; Her desperate NEED for people to trust, and how easy that is to exploit and abuse- is fully conveyed. It’s rare enough to see a sympathetic portrayal of any mental illness in our society let alone psychosis, a condition which has been enthusiastically vilified and sensationalized in our popular culture for at least a century. But to see a psychotic PROTAGONIST, and to see her condition in all the sorrow, fear, and wretchedness it can bring, through the eyes of a sympathetic narrator, while said protagonist is trapped among callous self-serving ppl who see in it not suffering to be soothed but an excuse to discount, ignore, abuse, and exploit; and then to see her declared INNOCENT and VICTIM and RIGHT in clear, masterful prose; when the fuck does this happen?

It of course plays structural roles too; both by confusing what exactly is going on with Harrow and, through that confusion, allowing the reader to share a small piece of Harrow’s experience. Her visions, her memories, her FALSE memories, and her experiences all intertwine to muddle what exactly is going on. Is this “madness” a long-term shame hidden, or an intense response to trauma? Is she physically injured, or emotionally wrecked by Gideon’s death? Has she changed herself in some way, and if she has is it a result of that; or is this something longstanding we’ve merely never seen before? Is she sleepwalking, or is Gideon sleepwalking her, or is The Body, or is something/one else? Is Cytherea a hallucination, or a cruel prank, or a revenant, or is she Haunted? Does physical evidence truly contradict her memories or is this a hallucination too? Harrow can’t be sure of any of this and neither can the reader, and this taste of her experience helps the reader to sympathize with her plight.

And, by confusing the nature of The Body, Cytherea, and what happened to Gideon(all “Bodies” from Harrow’s past in one way or another; some excellent wordplay whether intentional or no), the plot is obscured so that it can develop in a naturally suspenseful way. All these other possibilities obscure the possibility of Wake’s haunting, even though she and revenant possession are mentioned repeatedly throughout the book, laying out the development hidden in plain-sight. And that, in turn, works mechanically to allow these related plotlines -What’s up with The Body; what’s going on with Gideon; who’s the Narrator- spool out in a smooth, naturalistic, engrossing way as well.

It’s obvs by the end, and spcl given the reveal about Alecto’s eyes and how she leaves just when the Resurrection Beast arrives(ie just when it would start making a spirit leaving difficult), that “The Body” -Alecto- is a real visitation; from the moment they become gold on at least. I’m still not sure if her presence going back to Harrow opening the tomb are real or fabricated; I feel like she’d have told this to Gideon with all the rest. But: they didn’t have much time together, and it wouldn’t make much sense to fabricate visions which began post-Lyctor back into her past when the transformation itself could be blamed for them, so there’s good reason to think this aspect of her remembered “madness” was real even if the rest seemed to be part of the backstory needed to “make her a different person”(e.g. in fact she disdained grave dirt on the trip to First House and perennially disdained comforts or reliance on others of any kind, but the her she remembered not only always took the dirt, but also told Ortus about her “madness” immediately when it became pertinent. Pre-Surgery Harrow would never do that).

As to the Body and her visitations by it, based on what was said about Alecto(that she wasn’t really “dead” just sort or “turned off”) and the mechanics of revenant-possession/spirit-visitation(running along thanergic links created through relevance and physical contact/called up by powerful necromancers), I think that Harrow, through her religious devotion to the Tomb-turned romantic ecstasy(and what a cool callback to medieval sexualization of faith THAT is!), and by physically TOUCHING Alecto(who maybe was still spiritually aware even if her body was “turned off”) probably created an avenue for Alecto to remain in contact with her through the River wherever she went(though I can’t remember her mentioning having Visions of The Body on Canaan House? I need to look through Harrow again to see), potentially further amplified by Harrow unknowingly summoning her through sheer emotional need. Gideon’s description of “surfacing” pretty definitely nixes the idea that any of those visions were overlays masking interventions by her.

Jumping off from there to the sleepwalking/body-sharing/possession... Gideon makes it clear her “surface” moments were incredibly short(she kept getting “clotheslined down”) and that she never manifested or had any control over Harrow’s body until the climax. The description of how Harrow’s Memory-Stage works states Harrow’s soul “emptied” from her body whenever she was on the Stage, which was everytime she slept or otherwise became unconscious(I really need to go back and see if the Break Chapters always followed “Whole” chapters ending in sleep/unconsciousness) but, as above, Gideon was too well partitioned to ever take over until the moment near the end. Wake was in Gideon’s sword(thinking back to GtN, Harrow DID have an odd antipathy for it even then), and at somepoint post-Lyctor(post-surgery? That makes sense given that’s when the Dream Stage was built and Harrow’s defenses would have been down) she jumped to possessing Harrow herself. It must have been Wake who sleepwalked her to impale Cytherea, perhaps so she could transfer her “anchor” from the sword to her corpse. Though maybe revenants can haunt multiple objects at once from their anchor; I find it Ominous that Pent kept mentioning the need to exorcise the anchor there at the end and that no exorcism took place. Could the sword STILL be haunted? But what role could she possibly have to still play in the story?

As to Gideon herself... I really cannot see Muir killing her off like that. Is it possible for a bound cavalier soul to break it’s link to the Lyctor’s body? It is possible that -given the empty Tomb in Harrow’s final chapter and what that place could potentially represent- Alecto is now in Harrow’s body, but Alecto has HER OWN Body(which apparently looks nearly IDENTICAL to Harrow with Gideon’s eyes, which adds a humorous line of narcissistic accusation to Harrow’s attraction to her; hope Gideon picks that up in AtN :p), and it’d be the easiest thing in the world to have the trauma of resurfacing, somehow given she lacks Necromancy, from The River give Gideon in Harrow’s body amnesia. That chapter DOES have the implication, with those bones, that she’s doing Necromancy though, so who knows. It’s possible what we’re seeing there is finally a true merger of the two, though I doubt that given how I read the ending; I think the possibilities are either Gideon with amnesia(and potentially Necromantic now due to Harrow choosing not to return and her powers “ceding” to her body’s current occupant. Still not sure where the line btw physical&metaphysical is with necromantic ability), or Alecto in Harrow’s body, with both Gideon and Harrow “dead”(in or over the River due to Harrow’s choice) atm. One Flesh, One End, afterall owo owo owo

#Harrow the Ninth #Harrow the Ninth Spoilers #HtN Analysis #HtN Theories #zA's Wildeyed Guessings #analytic posts

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chickenshashlek · 5 years ago

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fair + marbles cry time

okay so this started as a random(ish) concept, literally because of one line and became a whole thing and i have regrets because it made me cry a lot but also no because im a sucker for Connections and this was all gorgeous really

so my theory is that fair and marbles are about the same couple (and their journey can be followed through quite a few songs i feel but rn focusing on these) and that one half of the couple is slowly losing their memory. initially i was convinced that joeys character was the one losing his memory but because of discord *glare* i now think it might be madeleines though it could still go either way for sure.

so in fair,

“Cos outwardly he says I try so hard to make you laugh at me/ And she, she does, she laughs as though she´s not heard the joke ten thousand times before” and this could take it either way now, she could be laughing because shes losing her memory and so to her it is like shes hearing it for the first time, or she laughs because he doesnt remember telling the joke before so... yeah.

“And he, he curses at the world for leaving him behind and he’s falling out of touch” which, if you’ve heard marbles its a big oof i dont think i really need to explain this one- and this is what made me think it was joey who was the one losing his memory, and consequently what started this whole thing

“Burying her head into his chest and clinging to the moment, ‘where have you been?’/ She’ll whisper ‘I’ve waited oh so long for you to come’” so like here again in the case of joey losing his memory ‘where have you been’ ‘ive waited oh so long for you to come’ as though shes been waiting for him to remember her again and ouch ‘clinging to the moment’ as though she doesnt know how long its going to last. but again all this could be flipped too with mads being the one whos losing her memories and this is one of her moments of full remembrance

bonus fair moments (ie i think these link too but too tired to properly explain them)

“he watches her get dressed as though she’s hurtling through time”

“I’ll spend my days so close to you cos if I’m standing here maybe everyone will think I’m alright”

“I’ve seen enough he says I know exactly what I want And it’s this life that we’ve created, inundated with the fated thought of you And if you asked me to, if you asked me I would lose it all Like petals in a storm” another one which furthers the mads losing her memory theory for me but again it could go either way and yea

marbles time

“You were in a band - still am - yeah but back then you had hair and your smile was so sublime” again this could be mads losing her memory but also the ‘back then you had hair’ reminds me of the bit in fair which is ‘she brushes her hand through his hair, hes got so much fucking hair’ and that just made me soft

“You used to buy me scotch - still do - yeah but now too much is never enough” mads why you drinkin so much :(( but also entirety of verse 1 is basically joey reminding mads of stuff too which ouch

“You stole the best years of my life I’ll give them back“ this made me think of how maybe best years ie when she wasnt losing her memory? idek man im v upset rn

“And I'd sink to the floor, what’s the point anymore And you, you’d reply with a glint in your eye (And you, you’d reply with a drink in your hand) Saying ‘I don’t know, but I’m here, I’m all yours, dear heart don’t cry’ (Saying ‘I don’t know, but I’m here, oh dear god, dear heart don’t cry’)” this entire thing was Big Emotion because okay first off, madeleine sings ‘i dont know, but im here, im all yours, dear heart dont cry’ while joey sang ‘i dont know, but im here, oh dear god, dear heart dont cry’ which made me think if joeys the one losing memory then its like. he doesnt entirely remember her but does know enough to realise how important she is to him BUT ON THE FLIP theres also ofc her trying to comfort him ‘im all yours’ and his is a ‘oh dear god’ like a plea y’know? anyway moving on

“The minute I met you the colours of my life begun to pour I’m scared of the dark” needed to include the first bit because its gorgeous but just focusing on the ‘im scared of the dark’ it could just be her being scared of him forgetting her again but it makes more sense if shes the one losing memories. im scared of the dark of the blank spaces, all thats forgotten, i really dont need to elaborate

“And now, even though you’re mad and these memories won’t stay, it’s okay

Cos now I get to meet you for the first time every single day” again you can see this go either way but joey sings this bit. ‘youre mad and these memories wont stay’ could go either way tbh ‘now i get to meet you for the first time every single day’ again i dont have anything to add which isnt obvious i just needed to repeat the line because it makes me cry a lot

“I’ll wait and hope And rest my head at night content Knowing where my marbles went“ so this bit very clearly goes either way, ill wait and hope for when your memories come back and it connects to fair too with the ‘ive waited oh so long for you to come’ but yeah

Extra Thoughts

so at the end of marbles theres humming in tune to fair (i didnt notice this, thanks @ discord) and mads’ is way stronger(?) than joeys and the whole ‘mindless humming’ thing is part of dementia etc which furthers the ‘mads is the one losing her memories’ but again its both of them humming

another disord point out could be with the madeleine drinking a lot to cope with her losing her memory (obv could also be to cope w joey losing his but yeah)

last lil bit, this turned out way longer than expected and i was going to connect the horror and the wild and battle cries to these songs as well (the dear heart thing) but now im not sure and @flootzavut pointed out how rockrose and the thistle can even tie in to this whole thing so who knows i might come back to this and cry about that later too

#this is so long wow #but anyway ive been crying about all this for a week now #pls appreciate thanks #a lot of upsetti spaghetti in my head rn #joey if youre reading this i want you to know i cried A Lot but its worth it #both these songs are so fjn gorgeous #okay bye now #the amazing devil #the horror and the wild

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monstvrsfm · 4 years ago

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JANE ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

( zendaya . she/her . twilight . ) your name is JANE. you’re TWENTY-ONE/THOUSANDS OF YEARS OLD, and you’ve been in wayward valley for as long as you care to remember. occasionally, you catch glimpses of another life, and it looks like BURNING AT THE STAKE, LOOKS THAT COULD KILL, ETERNITY NEXT TO YOUR TWIN AND BOOKS ON WITCHCRAFT but it’s all in your head, surely. after all, your GIFTED, DEVOTED, SADISTIC, & CALLOUS disposition has found a life of sweet contentment here in town, as a STUDENT/OCCULT SHOP EMPLOYEE. so why does it feel like something’s missing? ( mipsy . 21+ . she/her . cst . )

religion tw, burning tw, death tw

jane of the volturi , base icons and psds by ultraphoria (3) & evrmoredits (2) !

jane monroe whitmore, simply known as jane monroe, was born in new york city. she was a twin — born a few minutes before her baby sister, and beautiful twins at that. they were inseparable together, always knew when something happened to the other, deeply protective of each other only a twins’ bond could understand. as if their souls were intertwined, much like the time spent inside the womb. they spent their first two years of life in america, then their family moved to italy.

she grew up in florence, italy. while it would’ve been hard for any other family to adjust to two different cultures, jane assimilated very well. both twins were found to be gifted, so they had many talents, some things people only dreamed of. the twins excelled in school, played sports as top athletes, and still had time to invest in the arts. they were a jack of all trades, and a bit of tricksters. power siblings. they conquered their school, they practically owned it. together. the most important thing was that they were always together. no one could hurt them, as long as they were together.

university was challenging, but not because of the academics. it allowed the munroe twins to explore their individuality, away from each other. they still attended the same private university, each on a full ride of coarse, but this was different. jane found a fascination with mythology and folklore of the old ages, and of religion, especially wicca. she had her own friends, and flings, but she didn’t like being separated, for so long, from her twin. they were walking their own paths but she worried, especially as the older of the twins, about her sister. they’re co-dependent relationship, she felt, was falling apart. jane always felt much more powerful, when her sister was by her side. after her sister’s accident, her family dropped everything and moved again to a small town called wayward. a place so small, they had to be together.

jane has been in wayward for two years now, and she hates it. they replaced the beauty of italy with this? but the small town isn’t without it’s small town treasures. she returned to school, since she never finished, and was surprised to find they had religious studies here. when she’s not studying she likes to play a few sports, like volleyball, even if wayward doesn’t have much competition. and she’s picked up a job, just like her sister, so her and her sister can continue to live on their own. the monroe twins�� are still the power siblings of their year. still turning heads. she’s gotten more comfortable with to not seeing her sister as much, but she still values her twin’s company. they’re best friends, and jane always knows when something’s up with her sister. she can feel it. it’s a twin thing.

the memories that come back to jane are nightmares. haunted dreams of burning at the stake, scorching, and the pain. the pain is unbearable, and it feels real. there’s also a boy in her dreams, that looks a lot like her, but she feels an undying connection to. stronger than any connection she’s ever felt, including to her own twin sister. and that’s just the beginning. because of this, jane usually curls up in bed next to her sister, after these nightmares. they come and go, but she doesn’t know what to do with them. she’s honestly terrified by them. haunted by them.

CANON━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

jane was born in england around 800 a.d , which makes her over a thousand years old. jane and her fraternal twin brother, alec, had shown strong psychic abilities as children. the locals of the village couldn’t explain, but bad things seemed to happen to people who were unkind to the twins or their family, and good things happened to those who were friendly to them. terrified, the superstitious locals accused the twins of being witches and condemned them to burn at the stake. unbeknownst to the twins, the vampire aro had been aware of the children, and when he heard of the situation, aro killed the villagers and turned the twins into vampires. jane and alec would go on to be the youngest, and most powerful, members of aro’s volturi. jane, having felt so much anger while burning at the stake, gained the supernatural ability of pain illusion, inflicting the same burning pain she felt, on others. alec, wanting to escape the pain, gained the supernatural ability to numb the senses ( sight, taste, hearing, feeling, smell ).

jane’s canon is link.

look, i know alot about twilight. i read all the books, and watched the movies. even read some wiki pages, i know my stuff, ok? obvs jane is aged up for m*nor reasons.

jane is canon is up to breaking dawn.

she is my monster #2, because honestly jane deserved so much more. after learning her background i could understand why she has no remorse for taking a human life, or humans in general, and why her relationship to her brother is so precious. these CHILDREN did not deserve to be burned at the stake, but okay. anyway, this my attempt at a happy ending for her, no witch hunting, no vampires, just a twin to protect. i changed her twin to a twin sister to go along with her fake life. because i did not feel comfortable replacing alec with a boy twin. of coarse, she’ll eventually remember alec ( when we get one ) because they’re the true power siblings, aimright?

WANTED CONNECTIONS━━━━━━━━━━━━━

fake twin! ( only if ocs are allowed, idk. if not, she’ll be a npc! )

twilight muses! ( any and ALL members of the volturi! book and/or movies! i love them! but especially alec, the three kings ( marcus, aro, and caius ), renata, demitri, felix, chelsea, and heidi! )

vampire muses! ( now human )

werewolf muses! ( now human )

witch muses! ( now human )

coworkers/regulars!

classmates!

friends!

enemies!

and much more!

#jane intro #i swear i'll make better tags later!#this is why it's taking me so long #i have to write out their fake lives idk man #wayward:intro

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nagdabbit · 5 years ago

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lamp-bright rind Food Masterlist

Hello! I am Daggs! I write things and stuff!

Currently, I write a fic over on Ao3 called lamp-bright rind where everything is soft and I work out my feelings on an unsuspecting Billy Hargrove, because that’s just what’s happening while I’m stuck at home.

I thought it might be fun (and because I reeeeeaaallllllyy need something else to take up time, I’m going bonkers here) to like make a master list of all the recipe/food references in the fic? Because it’s a lot. My roommates can’t get out to get ingredients to feed me and I’m going through withdrawal. And, also, I really fucking love food. I can’t cook for shit, but I can eat like a mother fucker.

So with each chapter I’m gonna update this with where I got the recipes and link to them if they’re online or if my roommates let me give out their recipes that I have stolen (with permission, of course!). I’ll put a link at the top of each chapter, too. So. Here we go!

Chapter 1

This is a recipe from one of my roommates--henceforth known as Roommate Senior--and it is the most comfort food ass shit, y’all. I DO NOT have permission to give out the entire recipe for the sauce, only the ingredients that are included in the chapter. There are a few bits that I had to leave out, but not including them won’t actually ruin the dish, or so she says. Senior also does something else to her trofie because she’s just Like That. But, homemade trofie is my favourite pasta, y’all.

Here is a recipe from Italian Food Forever if you wanna give it a go. If you don’t feel like making your own pasta, because that shit takes time, The Chef recommends getting gnocchi. Something soft and starchy, basically. She also recommends: Delallo Roasted Red Peppers in Olive Oil. It’s a pretty common brand, apparently.

Chapter 2

1. This is my grandma’s Chicken Noodle Soup. So this is what we always had at Christmas time because it makes A Whole Ass Lot. And looking back, I think I definitely underestimated the amount of water/broth needed. This is one of three (3) things I can actually, competently cook IRL. Which explains why I work out as much as I do, because Reames noodles, y’all.

2. Jasmine Tea Panna Cotta from Madeline Effect. Never had it but, 1) Shiiiit is it pretty; 2) I love jasmine tea; and, 3) I fucking love plums, y’all.

3. Popcorn Ice Cream with Caramelized Popcorn and Black Pepper from page 263-5 of the NOPI cookbook by Yotam Ottolenghi and Ramael Scully. My other roommate--henceforth known as Roommate Junior--made this once and I just. I don’t even like popcorn, and I still think about that. The recipe itself isn’t online anywhere that I can find in full, but here is an Eat You Books link for the basic ingredients.

4. Raspberry Tart. This is a lesson in bookmarks. I SWEAR TO GOD, this came from Felicity Spector’s instagram, probably very far back. You’re gonna see her name pop up a lot on this list because I just love her instagram. So anyway. I have a very vivid memory of seeing a small little raspberry tart with pillowy clouds of whipped lemon verbena ganache. I know I saw it SOMEWHERE, but now I cannot find it. Learn from me. Bookmark your shit when you find it.

Chapter 3

A lot of the food I’m gonna mention is in reference to my favourite restaurant. It’s called Bourbon & Baker and my aunt takes me every time I visit. I don’t even care how long the drive there is, I’m there for the foooooooood (and her puppy, but that’s not the point). Funnily enough, the used to have a sister location in Chicago! Anyway, this is kind of what I’m basing Billy & Robin’s restaurant off of.

Currently, because of the You Know What, the menu on their site is pared down for To Go orders only, but I’m gonna use an old one I still have on my phone to give you an idea of the kind of food they serve, but also because I’m going through withdrawal.

1. Brussel sprouts. This, for the reason mentioned in the fic (blight), was removed from their menu before the last time I went, so this is gonna be mostly from memory: Roasted brussel sprouts (they were chopped p small and roasted til crispy), with toasted pecans, with a maple, brown sugar and balsamic vinegar glaze, and topped with shaved parm. Christ I miss those. Senior does a pretty good remix, but I think about those all the time.

2. Lamb Belly Tacos. So fucking goooooood. For size reference, it’s two street-style sized tacos. From the menu: Poblano chimichurri, crispy lamb belly, flour tortillas, Cojita cheese, pickled red onion, sunflower shoots, lime-mint tzatziki, cashew crumble.

3. Duck Tacos. This is a go-to for me. Like, if they take it off the menu, I will riot. From the menu: Citrus chile marinade, chargrilled, flour tortillas, Manchego cheese, spicy green-onion hoisin sauce, arugula, heirloom tomato relish.

4. Smoked Salmon. Here’s the trick. Get the salmon, keep 1-2 of the toasted breadsticks and use them to sop up the last of the Duck Taco juice. That’s the money. From the menu: Dill cream cheese, fried avocado, caper-red onion relish, lemon balsamic, arugula, toasted baguette.

5. The Waffle Thing. Okay. This is another thing they took off the menu before my last visit and I nearly DID riot. It sounds like there wasn’t nearly enough demand for it, which is a shame because it’s hecking incredible. From memory: a stack of orange zest waffles (1/4 wedges, so it was just one small/medium waffle divided and stacked) with sweet mascarpone, crispy prosciutto, maple syrup and a gooey ball of dates and pistachios.

6. “shrimp--” This was gonna be Shrimp & Grits. From the menu: Andouille grits, spinach collard greens, gulf chrimp, Cajun BBQ cashew cream.

ALSO on the menu this chapter, GRILLED CHEESES.

1. THE SOUP. I based it on this Smoky Tomato Soup from two peas & their pod.

2. Red Rock Cheddar & Gruyere. This is kinda based on the grilled cheese from B&B, except I just really like sourdough more than brioche. But that’s me. Red Rock Cheddar is a very specific kind of cheddar. It’s SUPER orange and also a blue cheese? It’s great. Creamy cheddar-like taste, but a hint of blue. Here’s a little thing about it if you’re curious.

3. Pumpernickel, ham, cheese. It’s basically this recipe from Finlandia Cheese, only Junior made it with pumpernickel once and it fucked me up. So good.

4. Onion, Mayo, Gouda. This is a Senior recipe. The closest IRL I can find is this from redbook mag. She, because she is just Like That, does something extra to her onions, but she confirmed that this recipe would be close enough to taste p good. Just switch in gouda for the cheese and put mayo INSIDE the sammich. I saw that some people put in on the outside instead of butter, and y’all need jesus. *shudder*

5. Toad in the hole. A midwest staple, but here is a recipe from Taste of Home if your family isn’t into dying early from a heart attack. In my head, Billy cooked the egg over hard, or at least NOT gooey, but that’s just for the mess. Obv it would be over easy/sunny in the restaurant. Obvs.

And there we have it! All the food from the first three chapters. Join me next time for more Daggs Loves Food and Really Misses Fresh Veggies, JFC.

Now, how should I tag this.

#stranger things fanfiction #billy/steve #fic: lamp-bright rind #lamp-bright rind #lamp bright rind

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pinkykitten · 5 years ago

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I was tagged by @writing-with-melon I hope my answers aren’t complete waste or if time and if so I’m sorry and I love you

Rules: Answer ten 10 questions, ask 10, and tag 10 people

1. What song automatically plays in your head when you look out the window on a long drive?

i dont really have an answer for this. i think i just automatically think about any song ive been listening to recently or any song that has been stuck in my head.

2. Do you have some snacks nearby when you write?

well i live in a two story house so the kitchen is downstairs and im usually lazy busy so since i have a mini fridge upstairs i just usually get water to drink while im writing. its kinda hard to eat and write cuz i loose focus really easily so when i am writing i am writing! i am in the zone! but if i am a little hungry ill usually snack on candy like chocolate kinder joys i love them but they r so expensive or snack on chips but i get like salt on my fingers or i like cheetos so cheetos dust and that just gets everywhere and later my hands and keyboard kinda smell like fart. 3. What do you do to combat creative burnout?

so burnout happens to me a lot so to get inspiration i either read other stories or fanfics which gets my head gears turning or i admire a piece of art or photography or a song. whats so unique and satisfying with writing you can explore and go anywhere with it, hehehe erotic if you know what i mean lol jk there are no barriers with writing just your imagination. there is inspiration any where you go and id advise to never stop writing. even if its a few short sentences or paragraphs about anything even bird poop its still progression and your mind is working and your searching for words like its all good for you bby. 4. Do you use (or like to use) prompts?

i do ill put the link here. im thinking of changing it though to do something different.

5. What is your favorite place to write?

lol boring, i know but my room. my room is really bright in the mornings and comfortable and chill and i have a candle of the pandora ride in disney that smells like the ride so its all good and relaxing and super peaceful plus i have a picture of myself the age of like 9 on my desk idk why but it encourages me and makes me focus to make sure i never get that cringy again.

6. What is a hobby or yous that you usually don’t talk about?

well i like working out HAHAHAHAHA jk that was a joke...get it...cuz i much rather be eatingokillstop. but i really like to draw which i have a art page you can see it if you click here pls look at my failed attempts to be hip and cool with the cool kids and being artsy fartsy. another hobby is i really like to do makeup and nail art, nail art is really tough guys no joke if you do it like you got wizard powers are something. maybe its bc my nails are shorter than pete davidson and ariana grande’s relationship, alright im trying to stop i swear!

7. Do you play an instrument? Which one?

no i wish though. i always wanted to learn to either play the piano or electric guitar cuz H.E.R looks so cool doing it.

8. How do you feel about your handwriting?

it sucks dont even try me. my sister can barely read it like no wonder nobody wants to steal my signature heck they can’t even read it!

9. Can you tell us of a story that marked your development as a person? As a writer?

ok sit back guys, sniff a nice amount of crack and get ready for the most cringy moment of my life but also a time when i knew i was meant to be *inhale* a fanfic writer.

so it was elementary school, i think 3rd grade and for my writing assignment we were given a prompt of idk what the heck tbh i think it was like be outside the box and im like ok imma nail this cuz im a weird child and yeah so i got my papers and pencil and i went TO TOWN on this paper. so i wrote two stories. one short story with a picture to go with it and one long story that yeah i buried years ago. so my first story was about a farmer was about that farming life. he had chickens and dairy. so i cant remember if the cheese was spoiled but doesnt matter. anywho these cheese and a chicken were alive like they could talk in the story and i gave them faces, yikes. but the whole story was the farmer was a b*tch and he was trying to eat the chicken and cheese so they hatched a plan to get away from the farmer. they did it successfully and they ran away. yay happy ending my teacher actually liked that one me too and my school mates were thinking what they heck is this girl on i made a story about how me and justin bieber made cookies for Christmas you know. so then my other story i was more proud of this one cuz it was a tone of paper, sorry trees, and this story was about how a female hippo (girl i was all about plus size and thicker girls and no body shaming) and an male ostrich were kidnapped from their own habitats and taken to become circus animals. failed version of Madagascar hey mine was before the circus movie OK THEY STOLE IT FROM MEEEEE. so they get taken and are treated to harsh punishment and the animals can talk and i think its in the point of view of the male ostrich guy thing. they are in the circus and they start to have this relationship happening. love starts blossoming its all good. im happy with this cuz i believed in love at age of 8. they find a way thru a kick butt scene of the animals escaping and the hippo and ostrich are so in love that they run away together and they have half hippo half ostrich babies and i think i named the species hipstrich or like ostppo idk but i was so proud of this story and when my teacher read it she was worried about me lol i think she thought i might like mate these two animals like secretly idk but she was like it was ok and i was like what this is frickin William Shakespeare writing or like F. Scott Fitzgerald writing. nevertheless it taught me a lesson that nobody else needs to like what im writing the main point and only thing that matters is if your proud of it and you like it and i really did. i will remember that story forever and thats what made me want to be a writer. lol sorry that was a lot.

10. @emdop I’m going to use this great question: Explain one of your WIPs in the most ridiculous way possible.

wellllll im working on my peaky blinders oc story its a lot of drugs money killing weapons jewelry rich profanities like its the show but written from my stubby hands so my oc and whatever its great and so excited to show it to you guys.

MY QUESTIONS:

1. WHAT MADE YOU WANT TO START TUMBLR?

2. IF YOU COULD CHANGE ANYTHING OF THIS WORLD, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

3. WHAT QUALITY IS IMPORTANT TO YOU?

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE OUTFIT?

5. WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE?

6. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE SONG IN THE WHOLE WORLD?

7. IF YOU COULD VISIT A PLACE, WHERE WOULD IT BE?

8. WHAT SHOW OR MOVIE UNIVERSE WOULD YOU WANT TO BE IN?

9. WHAT IS THE SCARIEST MOMENT OF YOUR LIFE?

10. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE IN THIS WORLD THAN ANYTHING ELSE?

im tagging: @thatlittlered, @ardentmuse, @acciosnapes, @lotsoffandomimagines, @collecting-stories, @blog-of-a-multitude-of-fandoms, @naughtyneganjdm, @lenahellgizibe and two random followers @spiritsent, @sucker-for-my-fandoms

i was tagged by @writing-with-melon again ty btw, ps i felt so much pressure lol jk 😊

Rules: Answer 5 questions, Ask 5 questions, Tag 5 people.

1. What is your favorite book?

fifty shades of grey hahaha naw my favorite book is obv you all know this is series of unfortunate events but i never usually cry period and i never cry for books ever so when i read mrs. tom thumb by melanie benjamin, its the part when her sister minnie dies i cried so hard idk it was just emotional the wording the way she described her pain it was so beautiful written yet so sad and that was just amazing to me cuz im like this book made me feel things and im like wow i would love to write a book one day and make someone feel something whether it be sadness anger happiness annoyance anything they are having an emotion and that is super powerful to do that with just words. pls go check out that book its a good read. also im a fan of the greatest showman so i really enjoyed it. there are many other books tho that i thoroughly enjoy so much.

2. What piece that you’ve written are you most proud of?

oh my god ive always wanted to be asked this question hands down i am always proud of my platonic gender neutral tony stark fic called in·con·sol·a·ble window to me i wrote it so sad and i was feeling like depressed lol when i saw peter die in infinity war like i didnt know what to do with my life tbh but im so glad that @impetrichorny requested it tysm i just like how its not based on romance or fluff or happiness it is based on when you lose someone the nightmares and sadness you go through and that there is nothing nobody can do about it except just be there for that person so i really like writing angst and something that was out of the box. ive been thinking tho of doing a part two since the fate of all the characters has changed after endgame. who knows tho.

3. What is the last song that inspired you?

well for art it would have to good news by mac miller when i did that kobe bryant memorial on my art page. i dont want to give it away though but ill just say some very powerful womens music inspired my oc writing and making.

4. How do you feel about letting people read what you write?

at first i was scared cuz i thought i wrote like trash which that feeling kinda doesnt go away like some days i feel that way others i feel confident or it depends on the request it just depends but anyways i was always insecure about my writing so when i started writing it was more like lets see how this goes if not ill delete the whole page. im glad to say it went great but in the begging it was hard cuz i kept putting myself down but i learned to accept or just understand that you keep learning with writing you always learn knew things with writing how you can explain something better or you words get more intricate and people see the improvement and you do too thats why i applaud those who dont speak english that english isnt their first language. you are doing a tremendous job and keep practicing cuz you’re gonna make it to the top. ive also learned that some days are not my days and you can take time off when youre not feeling it when you have writers block. just recollect your juices sip some tea go to the beach relax your mind a little and take as long as you need to come back and give it your all. also comments and reblogs and likes a follows those meant so much to me and encouraged me. thats why i cant express it enough how much all those mean to writers, artist, photographers, anybody who is truly trying their hard in this area of social media. its makes a person happy smile and confident in their writing but first train your mind into loving what you make not what others thing. you have to be happy with the outcome that is what truly matters and what makes your writing the best. look at me getting philosophical.

5. Do you get distracted easily? If yes with what?

yes and with porn haha i get distracted easily like very easily homeschooling was really tough for me. music distracts me, netflix, the urge to watch david dobrik or unus annus or buzzfeed unsolved on youtube, heck my farts distract me. i gotta be like troy bolton i gotta get my HEAD IN THE GAME!

MY QUESTIONS:

1. IF YOU COULD BE NAMED SOMETHING ELSE, WHAT WOULD YOU BE NAMED?

2. WHAT PERSON INSPIRES YOU THE MOST?

3. IF YOU KNEW THE WORLD WAS ENDING TOMORROW WHAT WOULD YOU DO TODAY?

4. WHAT DO YOU OFTEN THINK ABOUT IN THE SHOWER?

5. WHATS YOUR WEIRD COMBINATION FOOD?

im tagging: @thatlittlered, @ardentmuse, @acciosnapes, @lotsoffandomimagines, @collecting-stories AND WHOEVER WANTS TO DO THIS IF YOU FOLLOW ME OR LIKE MY STORIES TAG ME ILL READ YOUR ANSWERS. HOPE I DID THIS RIGHT SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING MWUAH

#ask #@writing-with-melon #rambles #writing #tips on writing #unus annus #david dobrik #netflix #buzzfeed unsolved #peaky blinders oc #kobe bryant #mac miller #tony stark #peter parker #the greatest showman #tom thumb #troy bolton #zac efron

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angelofthequeers · 5 years ago

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Hold Me By Both Hands: Chapter 32

Disclaimer: I don’t own ML.

Basically just my way of covering episodes I didn’t want to write but also wanted to establish XD

Chapter 31 | Chapter 33 | AO3 link

[9:23 pm] Chat Noir has joined miraculass.

Chat Noir: heh

Chat Noir: nice chat name

Chat Noir: didn’t know you had it in you foxy

Rena Rouge: i’ll actually ban you

Chat Noir: :(

Chat Noir: say sike rn

Rena Rouge: don’t test me

[9:28 pm] Carapace has joined miraculass.

Rena Rouge: hey shellhead

Carapace: would’ve thought we’d be more mature

Carapace: yk since we’re superheroes n all

Rena Rouge: hey

Rena Rouge: if i didn’t do it

Rena Rouge: chat would’ve

Chat Noir: you wound me

**Chat Noir: **but you’re right

**Chat Noir: **just don’t tell lb or she’ll have my arse

Rena Rouge: you know she can just scroll up when she joins right

Chat Noir: FUCK

[9:52 pm] Ladybug_ _has joined miraculass.

Ladybug: very mature, whoever named the chat

Rena Rouge: skdhfsojsaljfs;dlsa;ldjwjkhdfladybug

Rena Rouge: sorry autocorrect

Carapace: a likely excuse

Rena Rouge: it was chat

Chat Noir: le what

**Chat Noir: **i've been framed

Chat Noir: scroll up lb

Ladybug: both Chat and Rena are banned

Rena Rouge: >:|

Chat Noir: noooooo

Carapace: is it too late to give back the miraculous?

**Rena Rouge: **hey

Chat Noir: :(

Ladybug: yes, it is

Ladybug: you can’t leave me with the furries

Chat Noir: i’m not a furry :|

Rena Rouge: i resemble that remark

Carapace: you kinda r dude

Carapace: you literally run around in a black leather catsuit

Chat Noir: you come into my house

[9:59 pm] Carapace set Chat Noir’s name to furry noir.

furry noir: >:|

Rena Rouge: PFFT

[10:00 pm] Carapace set Rena Rouge’s name to what does the fox say.

furry noir: PFFT

what does the fox say: JFC

what does the fox say: i will find you

**what does the fox say: **and i will shove my flute

Ladybug: PERFECT

**furry noir: **i think you mean

Ladybug: don’t you dare

furry noir: purrfect

Ladybug: >:|

furry noir: 0:)

what does the fox say: oh come on now i can’t even finish my threat

what does the fox say: just wait till i name you shellhead

[10:01 pm] Carapace set their name to mess w turt u get hurt.

what does the fox say: istg

furry noir: bro

furry noir: i think i love you

mess w turt u get hurt: ew no

mess w turt u get hurt: ladybug save me from the furry

Ladybug: I’ll tell on you

furry noir: lol

furry noir: you think you scare me

Ladybug: no

Ladybug: but you-know-who does

furry noir: D:

what does the fox say: !!!!!

what does the fox say: wHO

Ladybug: inside joke

Ladybug: nvm

what does the fox say: :(

furry noir: omg

furry noir: ladybug you’re bi right

Ladybug: uh, yeah

what does the fox say: we had that freebie convo remember

mess w turt u get hurt: wait what

[10:04 pm] furry noir set Ladybug’s name to ladyBIrd.

ladyBIrd: I swear to god

ladyBIrd: thanks, now my kwami won’t stop laughing

furry noir: :)

ladyBIrd: this is so unfair

ladyBIrd: she’s supposed to be on my side

furry noir: at least yours sides w you sometimes

what does the fox say: and i thought trixx could be a little shit

mess w turt u get hurt: man i’m glad wayzz is chill

furry noir: :(

ladyBIrd: nope, I can’t do this

ladyBIrd: I can’t handle that name popping up every time I get a notification

[10:07 pm] ladyBIrd set furry noir’s name to catitude.

catitude: :D

what does the fox say: k cool i’ll keep this ancient relic name

ladyBIrd: only from like 2013, it’s not that old

mess w turt u get hurt: man i feel old when i remember those days

what does the fox say: stfu

what does the fox say: you named me you don’t get to regret

chat noir: don’t regretti the spaghetti

[10:20 pm]

catitude: guys?

[10:32 pm]

catitude: i see how it is

[10:35 pm] direct messages

Ladybug: hey

Ladybug: you know we’re not actually mad at your joke, right?

Chat Noir: yeah ik

Chat Noir: i’ll get yelled at if you’re actually mad

Ladybug: :(

Ladybug: no, you won’t

Ladybug: just a stern talking-to

Ladybug: unless you sacrifice yourself for me or something

Chat Noir: oof

Chat Noir: you’re still mad bout zombizou?

Ladybug: and Dark Cupid

Ladybug: and Timebreaker

Ladybug: I mean, I know I’m the only one who can purify akumas

Ladybug: but jfc

Chat Noir: sorry

Chat Noir: i just

Chat Noir: it’s not like i’m trying to play the hero yk?

Chat Noir: it’s just like

Chat Noir: i don’t want to get zombified or dusted or whatevs

Chat Noir: and it’s not like chivalry or whatever protect the lady bullshit

Chat Noir: i just know that you’re the only one who can fix everything

Chat Noir: and you’ll bring me back

Ladybug: yeah but

Ladybug: it doesn’t make watching you get killed or brainwashed any easier

Ladybug: and I can’t exactly see a therapist or something

Ladybug: because secret identities and all that

Chat Noir: :(

Chat Noir: i wanna say i promise not to throw myself in front of you

Chat Noir: but i can’t promise that

Ladybug: I know

Ladybug: I just

Ladybug: I can’t talk to anyone about it

Ladybug: except for you

Ladybug: and one of these days, everything’s going to get to me

Ladybug: and I’m just going to explode

Ladybug: fuck, I’m only 15

Chat Noir: oof

Chat Noir: same

Chat Noir: about the age thing

Chat Noir: and about the can’t tell anyone else thing

Chat Noir: my father’s kind of a dick so

Ladybug: :(

Chat Noir: but all i want is his approval

Chat Noir: like fuck do i have to scrape out my soul and turn myself into a robot to make him happy

Chat Noir: sorry

Chat Noir: didn’t mean to explode

Ladybug: don’t apologise

Ladybug: seriously

Ladybug: we’re in this together

Chat Noir: <3

Ladybug: <3

Chat Noir: why milady are you flirting with me

Chat Noir: whatever would marinette say

Ladybug: buzz off

Chat Noir: wrong miraculous :)

Ladybug: I’ll ask Rena to ban you

Chat Noir: actually

Chat Noir: should we ask her to give us mod power instead of her

Chat Noir: yk cause we’re the ogs

Ladybug: well, I don’t think Rena would abuse her power

Ladybug: and she is the tech whiz out of us

Ladybug: maybe just get her to give us mod power too

Chat Noir: tru tru

Chat Noir: i should go to bed

Chat Noir: but like

Chat Noir: i get to talk to you

Chat Noir: whenever I want

Ladybug: <3

Ladybug: go to bed, kitty

Ladybug: you can talk to me whenever you want, so I’ll still be here when you wake up

Chat Noir: k

Chat Noir: night bugaboo <3

Ladybug: night, kitty <3

[9:02 am] miraculass

ladyBIrd: oh, by the way

ladyBIrd: rules

ladyBIrd: don’t say anything that could give identities away

catitude: duh

ladyBIrd: and don’t abuse pings

what does the fox say: omg thank god

what does the fox say: i legit left a chat cause someone kept @ing us

what does the fox say: all the time

mess w turt u get hurt: so like only for emerg?

ladyBIrd: yep

ladyBIrd: or if you really need to get our attention

catitude: btw rena

catitude: knight us

what does the fox say: wut

ladyBIrd: he means

ladyBIrd: please give me and Chat mod powers

what does the fox say: k

what does the fox say: can i still be mod

ladyBIrd: sure, you’re the one who knows how to work this

what does the fox say: fuck yeah

mess w turt u get hurt: hello darkness my old friend

what does the fox say: suck it shellhead >:)

mess w turt u get hurt: you wanna go furry?

ladyBIrd: thank god it’s Saturday

ladyBIrd: I’m still in bed

what does the fox say: lmfao

what does the fox say: sounds like my bff

what does the fox say: she’s always late

ladyBIrd: >:|

catitude: i know who you’re talking about

catitude: and may i just say

catitude: bitch

what does the fox say: <3

mess w turt u get hurt: cool

mess w turt u get hurt: not like i’m here or anythin

ladyBIrd: I hope you’re nicer to your best friend than Rena is to hers

what does the fox say: hey

mess w turt u get hurt: fuckin duh

catitude: :)

mess w turt u get hurt: :)?

catitude: ¯_(ツ)_/¯

what does the fox say: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

ladyBIrd: Donkey!

what does the fox say: jkasdosdcpdskcsklandkjehfu

mess w turt u get hurt: omg

catitude: marry me milady

ladyBIrd: ew, no thanks

catitude: :(

catitude: how could this happen to me

catitude: i made my mistakes

what does the fox say: can i just say

what does the fox say: being in a gc with lb and cn

what does the fox say: is the only thing i’ve wanted from life

mess w turt u get hurt: i thought you said you had a bf

what does the fox say: eh

what does the fox say: he’ll get over it

mess w turt u get hurt: i mean

mess w turt u get hurt: tbf my gf would live thru me if she knew

what does the fox say: i love the sound of her

mess w turt u get hurt: !!!!!

mess w turt u get hurt: wait till i tell her what a superhero said

mess w turt u get hurt: rip to her

catitude: is this the sound of getting along i hear? :D

what does the fox say: hell no

mess w turt u get hurt: hell no

what does the fox say: scuse me mr copycat

catitude: that brings back memories

mess w turt u get hurt: uh obvs i was typing before you

what does the fox say: think you need to get your eyes checked shellhead

ladyBIrd: ANYWAY

ladyBIrd: you know you can’t tell her about this, right?

mess w turt u get hurt: :|

mess w turt u get hurt: ugh forgot

mess w turt u get hurt: anyway rena you’re annoying but you’re ok

what does the fox say: yea you’re mildly tolerable too

catitude: aww :D

what does the fox say: stfu

[10:35 am] miraculass

ladyBIrd: @everyone akuma

what does the fox say: no shit really

mess w turt u get hurt: guess max wasn’t lying bout markov having feelings :/

catitude: i’m just about to transform

catitude: cu on the flipside

ladyBIrd: same

what does the fox say: can we help

ladyBIrd: yes please

ladyBIrd: I’ve never seen a non-human akuma before

what does the fox say: i’m surprised chloe even tried to help

what does the fox say: like told ms m that she was being ridiculous

what does the fox say: then went after marinette to mr d’s office to help get markov back

mess w turt u get hurt: maybe she’s really changing

mess w turt u get hurt: ugh my gf keeps texting someone but she still noticed me trying to get away

what does the fox say: rip

what does the fox say: my bf is trying to ditch me

what does the fox say: i mean k i need to get away to transform

what does the fox say: but he’s being sus

what does the fox say: nvm i ducked into bathroom

what does the fox say: let him keep his secrets

mess w turt u get hurt: just got away from gf gonna turn now

what does the fox say: same with bf

ladyBIrd: just hurry and transform before Mendeleiev falls

ladyBIrd: also this is killing me

what does the fox say: ????

ladyBIrd: nvm

ladyBIrd: inside joke

what does the fox say: >:|

[12:03 pm] miraculass

ladyBIrd: good job, guys

mess w turt u get hurt: poor max

what does the fox say: i’m glad he turned markov back on

catitude: same

catitude: but uh

catitude: we’re gonna be late back to class if we don’t hurry

what does the fox say: SHIT

[6:48 pm] miraculass

ladyBIrd: so

ladyBIrd: interesting fact

what does the fox say: ?????

ladyBIrd: we talked to the guy who gave our Miraculouses

ladyBIrd: he said that HM wants them because the Ladybug and Black Cat combined lets you make a wish

catitude: like

catitude: any wish

catitude: whatev you want

mess w turt u get hurt: shit

what does the fox say: ugh so he’s after ultimate power

what does the fox say: typical

what does the fox say: can’t even be an interesting villain

mess w turt u get hurt: but like

mess w turt u get hurt: why don’t we use them and wish

ladyBIrd: yeah, I asked that

ladyBIrd: wishing has a price

what does the fox say: duh

mess w turt u get hurt: i’m gonna choose to ignore you bc serious business

catitude: yeah so if hawkass like wishes to bring someone back to life or something

catitude: someone else just as important gets dusted

ladyBIrd: equal exchange

ladyBIrd: and the universe shifts to accommodate that change

mess w turt u get hurt: oof

what does the fox say: shit

ladyBIrd: yeah

ladyBIrd: cause Chat and I are balance and all

ladyBIrd: hence why ours have that power

what does the fox say: but he’ll never get them

what does the fox say: cause like

what does the fox say: he’s not even a good bad guy

mess w turt u get hurt: rena has a point

mess w turt u get hurt: just same shit over again

what does the fox say: he never like makes an akuma to track miracs

what does the fox say: or make a stealth akuma to follow and see you turn back

mess w turt u get hurt: yeah he just makes weird akumas n prays they win

catitude: f for hawkmoth’s intelligence

ladyBIrd: let us be thankful he’s not that competent

[1:19 pm] miraculass

what does the fox say: oh btw

what does the fox say: happy 1 month anniv of this chat

catitude: you called?

what does the fox say: -_-

mess w turt u get hurt: shit has it been a month

ladyBIrd: and a month since you joined the team, Carapace!

mess w turt u get hurt: !!!!

mess w turt u get hurt: didn’t even realise

ladyBIrd: you and Rena were excellent choices

catitude: yeah you guys are pawsome heroes

what does the fox say: lasjddksfjsalkdsalfhjdksjsdladybugthankmarryme

what does the fox say: also stfu chat

catitude: :(

catitude: no one loves this poor cat

ladyBIrd: mhm

catitude: :(

mess w turt u get hurt: i’m here for u bro

catitude: bro

mess w turt u get hurt: bro

what does the fox say: welp

what does the fox say: f for shellhead’s gf

mess w turt u get hurt: hey you’d do lb so f for your bf

what does the fox say: i mean

catitude: called tf out lol

what does the fox say: banned

catitude: can’t

catitude: i’m irresistpawble

ladyBIrd: i’m telling on you

catitude: mmm whatcha say :(

what does the fox say: k srsly who is this person

ladyBIrd: nvm

what does the fox say: fine

what does the fox say: keep your secrets

[11:19 am] miraculass

ladyBIrd: SHITSHITSHITSHIT

ladyBIrd: ADRIEN NO

what does the fox say: chloe’s mum??? srsly???

ladyBIrd: @catitude where are you???

ladyBIrd: @catitude @catitude @catitude @catitude @catitude

ladyBIrd: I CAN’T TAKE ON STYLE QUEEN MYSELF

what does the fox say: lb

what does the fox say: hold on

[11:22 am] direct messages

Rena Rouge: hey

Rena Rouge: lb

Rena Rouge: maybe he’s not here yet

Ladybug: or maybe he got glittered!

Rena Rouge: well you don’t have to take on sq yourself

Rena Rouge: i’m here

Rena Rouge: so is carapace

Ladybug: nope

Ladybug: he got glittered too

Rena Rouge: oof

Rena Rouge: huh what are the chances of all 4 of us being here

Ladybug: i gotta transform

Ladybug: i thought chloe was doing better

Ladybug: she tried to help Marinette with Markov last week

Ladybug: but she’s sucking up to Style Queen

Rena Rouge: she could be playing sq

Rena Rouge: she’s got a boner for you remember

Ladybug: ew, no

Ladybug: just

Ladybug: transform

Rena Rouge: k

Rena Rouge: she’s gonna pay for hitting nino

Rena Rouge: and chat

Rena Rouge: and shellhead i guess

[12:04 pm] direct messages

Rena Rouge: WAS THAT CHAT’S KWAMI

Ladybug: yep

Ladybug: Plagg

Ladybug: don’t worry, first time meeting him for me too

Rena Rouge: i can’t believe he just

Rena Rouge: STAY AWAY FROM THE LADYBUG

Rena Rouge: that was adorable

Rena Rouge: and then i got glittered

Rena Rouge: still salty i missed the mass cataclysm

Ladybug: well, you were right about Chloe

Rena Rouge: yeah

Rena Rouge: getting glittered to save us from sq

Ladybug: I kind of feel sorry for her

Ladybug: realising that your mother won’t love you and doesn’t think you’re exceptional

Ladybug: it’s not an excuse but

Ladybug: I did talk to her a few months ago and she said it was like a switch being flipped

Rena Rouge: maybe u could talk to her again then

Rena Rouge: like

Rena Rouge: we don’t owe her anything

Rena Rouge: but if she stops being a bitch then our lives are better

Ladybug: true

Ladybug: she got Marinette to help her be better, you know

Rena Rouge: ew

Rena Rouge: why would mari do that after all the bullying

Ladybug: probably to make her life and everyone else’s lives easier

Rena Rouge: true

Ladybug: OH SHIT

Rena Rouge: um???

Rena Rouge: why does chloe have the bee??? and calling herself queen bee???

Ladybug: I DROPPED IT

Ladybug: I couldn’t think of anyone on such short notice but my Lucky Charm said so

Ladybug: I was gonna become Ladybee

Rena Rouge: wait you can use two???

Ladybug: yeah but it can be too much to handle

Ladybug: we needed to immobilise Style Queen

Ladybug: and I freaking DROPPED IT

Ladybug: I’m DEAD

Rena Rouge: well

**Rena Rouge: **that was a heck of a mental breakdown

Ladybug: I have to go after Chloe but my family won’t let me out of their sight :|

Rena Rouge: i’ll go

Rena Rouge: wait

Rena Rouge: where exactly are you??

Ladybug: secret identities >:|

Rena Rouge: right sorry

Rena Rouge: i just

Rena Rouge: force of habit

Rena Rouge: not that i ever would’ve exposed you

Ladybug: I know

Ladybug: I trust you

Rena Rouge: lsdkfpsdjcjsahfdsfjhnfdkjlkofkgimgay

Ladybug: Rena

Rena Rouge: right going

[1:37 pm] miraculass

mess w turt u get hurt: um

mess w turt u get hurt: so

mess w turt u get hurt: that happened

what does the fox say: fuckin chloe

ladyBIrd: I’m not judging her

ladyBIrd: like, her mother’s totally awful

ladyBIrd: but jfc I kind of wish I’d gotten another punch in

what does the fox say: still no excuse

catitude: yeah but the way her mum fucked her up on live tv

catitude: i kinda feel bad for her

ladyBIrd: at least she gave the Miraculous back

what does the fox say: fuckin hawkdick

what does the fox say: i could be helping my bff make a life changing choice

what does the fox say: but no i had to bust my arse on another akuma

mess w turt u get hurt: ugh why doesn’t hawkdick have a timer like us

ladyBIrd: because he’s an adult

ladyBIrd: apparently, adults don’t have the limits we do

mess w turt u get hurt: gdi

catitude: looks like no bee for now then

ladyBIrd: btw, Plagg told me details about all the anime you watch

catitude: FUCK

what does the fox say: EXPOSED

#miraculous ladybug #ml fic #aotq fic #aotq: hold me #marinette dupain-cheng #adrien agreste #alya cesaire #nino lahiffe #group chat #because i am weak #and love group chats #renapace rivalry #robostus #style queen #queen wasp

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years ago

Text

Sick Kids

ihatemyguts: Hey, who's about today? brainpain: 👀 brainpain: 👃 brainpain: 👅 ihatemyguts: Uncanny brainpain: I know ihatemyguts: Artistic endeavors keeping you busy? brainpain: [a selfie of her dramatic 🌈 makeup aesthetic] ihatemyguts: Okay but I'm gonna need a tutorial ihatemyguts: I never even mastered lipstick brainpain: I'll hook you up brainpain: check your private msgs ihatemyguts: 👍🙏 ihatemyguts: if my face is gonna be 🌚 from now on, it should really look pretty ihatemyguts: #juststeroidthings brainpain: it's a good face brainpain: + if I can rock a half shaved head with my brainpain: 👀 brainpain: 👃 brainpain: 👅 brainpain: not a time to still be alive brainpain: LMAO ihatemyguts: no doubt you rocked it so well everyone thought it was a choice brainpain: you gotta act like you're starting a 🌚 worshipping cult brainpain: I'll do a tutorial for that brainpain: full face of silver ihatemyguts: I can get down with that ihatemyguts: 🙌🌊🩸🐺🙌 ihatemyguts: am here on a bit of a recruitment mission, actually brainpain: my housemates & I are all synced 🩸 wise so you'd be doing me a favour, newbie brainpain: living battle royale over here brainpain: not trying to recruit you to fight to the death by my side though, we're good brainpain: what's the job? ihatemyguts: That sounds delightful, man ihatemyguts: also lowkey how has that never happened, not even with my ma ihatemyguts: clearly just that cold and standoffish she's like nah ihatemyguts: maybe I should wait 'til Zach is here too 'cos it was kinda his idea but if I give cred now, we're all good and I can take the blame if it's a big nope brainpain: you're still a 👶 not even gonna be synced with yourself yet brainpain: hold up I'll drag him by his curls brainpain: out there having a life like a real boy 😤 ihatemyguts: 😂 ihatemyguts: he'll get tricked into going to a weird Funland island and get turned into a donkey for his crimes, it's okay brainpain: sounds lit brainpain: [inandout has entered the chat] inandout: 🤥 ihatemyguts: How's your conscience? ihatemyguts: 🦗🦗🦗 inandout: 💎 clear ihatemyguts: 🤨 suspect inandout: you're not my wine mum inandout: or vodka aunt ihatemyguts: How rude ihatemyguts: Put some respect on your cult leader inandout: 🙇🙏 inandout: no food offerings ihatemyguts: safe bet gotspoons: 👋 I'm here! gotspoons: having a great day today, actually got energy, whaaaa?! 😲🤭 inandout: quick! float the idea while she's on cloud 9 gotspoons: You make me sound like an ogre, Zach 😜 gotspoons: what's going on? brainpain: Princess ogre ihatemyguts: Fiona ihatemyguts: v chic ihatemyguts: anyway, as we're all 👍 besides battle royale 🩸 ihatemyguts: we was thinking, and talking 'bout, a potential meetup ihatemyguts: thought we'd float it, see what y'all 💭 brainpain: I've got a 🍳 I'm 👍 + in ihatemyguts: which princess is that? one with crazy long hair, I 👀 it ihatemyguts: it could be cool, yeah? and why not, we'd have to make sure everyone who wants to can obvs or what's the point but apart from that brainpain: Princess me, unless the bleach makes it all fall out 😬 brainpain: [a very her style location] 📌🌎 inandout: we're not doing it there gotspoons: This is the problem, guys 😩 gotspoons: it would be really awesome but there is SO much planning you'd have to do to make it safe for everyone gotspoons: and picking a place for everyone that meets all the requirements inandout: we're willing to do all that inandout: planning + safety stuff ihatemyguts: totally ihatemyguts: like we could even go to a park or somewhere totally neutral ihatemyguts: or see if we can find some council-owned hall or something, 'cos places like that HAVE to be accessible ihatemyguts: I don't mind calling around and I bet Rich knows lots, and you will think of ALL the ways to keep EVERYONE safe and happy, right Rosie? brainpain: where I used to have support group would actually work brainpain: [a decent location that's like a community centre of something] ihatemyguts: 🙌 that looks legit ihatemyguts: if we explain what we're tryna do, bet they won't even charge us brainpain: I've got a hook up as ⭐ pupil brainpain: had my pick of those circle of chairs tigerbalm: 🙀🙀🙀🙀 tigerbalm: are we REALLY going to be able to meet up in person?! inandout: possibly gotspoons: How are we going to do this, IF we can gotspoons: you have to think about food and drink and seating and how we'd cover that, even if they did give us the venue for free inandout: I'm great with funds, it's assumed and expected gotspoons: but is that fair? gotspoons: I know some of us have none or very little inandout: I won't charge any of you a fee to come through the doors inandout: not that Jewish gotspoons: Oh, Zach! ihatemyguts: 🤑 is an accessibility issue, this should be a service, it should exist for free ihatemyguts: but it doesn't ihatemyguts: so if we can do this for ourselves, and offer it for free, for as little expense as possible ihatemyguts: maybe people will pull their finger out and consider actually doing their job ihatemyguts: you can write about it on your blog, get the word out brainpain: I'll fund-raise on stream, I've got your backs, nerds ihatemyguts: Right? High🖐 ihatemyguts: it's for US, so all of us that can, will put money into it ihatemyguts: no pressure on the ones that can't, fuck that, if anyone is gonna be that arsehole then they aren't welcome, yeah? tigerbalm: my parents have a people carrier, cos of course they do, but my creepy uncle won't be invited if any of y'all need rides ihatemyguts: 🤩🤩🤩 gotspoons: I'm going to do some research gotspoons: A LOT of research gotspoons: I would hate for anything to happen to anyone is this group tigerbalm: Where's Rich? tigerbalm: he would love to be on the front lines about this gotspoons: He would be a big help gotspoons: I feel like he had a uni thing today, an open day or something like that??? gotspoons: ugh my memory letting me down AS PER tigerbalm: how exciting! tigerbalm: I'll have to quiz him when he shows gotspoons: I know! gotspoons: He always checks in though, he'll be here later brainpain: Moving on, for those of us too brain damaged for further education gotspoons: 😔 brainpain: just me & my raging hormones LOL brainpain: he'll be such a happy nerd gotspoons: that's for sure gotspoons: he'll probably know so many answers to our questions already enablednotdisabled: I thought this group existed in lieu of an in-person group? brainpain: sup dude, it does enablednotdisabled: wouldn't it be potentially exclusionary to take this offline then? enablednotdisabled: realistically, there will be some of us who simply cannot get there inandout: if you wanna get there, we'll make it happen inandout: facetime you in if nothing else works enablednotdisabled: I'm not talking for myself, just others who might not feel confident enough to inandout: collective "you" inandout: we've all got phones enablednotdisabled: I just feel like this group can be quite us vs. them at times enablednotdisabled: hard to get heard if you aren't in the core group tigerbalm: There isn't a core group tigerbalm: everyone is listened to & respected enablednotdisabled: With all due respect, you are a part of it enablednotdisabled: so, of course, you feel that way enablednotdisabled: I'm not suggesting you can't break off and do your own thing, but the main chat of this forum that is meant to be for all of us, isn't the place for it brainpain: this group is what you make it, man brainpain: + the main chat brainpain: hit us with a topic you wanna talk about whenever inandout: it was brought up here so everyone knows they're invited ihatemyguts: I'm new and everyone I've found has been really receptive and welcoming to whatever I've had to say ihatemyguts: it sucks that you've not had that experience yourself but no one here is excluding you right now, least of all Robyn enablednotdisabled: There's a definite atmosphere here, whether you want to acknowledge it or not enablednotdisabled: the guidelines of what is expected and what is acceptable need to be clearer enablednotdisabled: and the moderators, who I've never actually witnessed in chat, should be quicker to put people on the right track, making this more therapeutic/beneficial to all, ban people if necessary brainpain: If you 🔎 hard enough for an atmosphere, it's findable brainpain: when you come in with a definite attitude of your own that's not gonna help none gotspoons: There's no need for us to have an argument, this is supposed to be a positive space gotspoons: if you have a complaint you'd like to make @enablednotdisabled, there is a link to contact the mods directly gotspoons: but I'd be happy to talk to you, privately if you'd prefer, and then we can take it from there? enablednotdisabled: I can handle my own complaints, thanks enablednotdisabled: and this isn't a positive space for me, and plenty other people I've talked to gotspoons: It hurts me to hear that, I'm really sorry and steps do need to be taken to attempt to rectify that then handicapable: I agree, it's cliquey here, unless you're one of the 'popular kids' or core group as @enablednotdisabled said, nobody cares handicapable: @ihatemyguts may be new but her finding a way in doesn't mean the walls aren't there for the rest of us handicapable: I barely log in any more gotspoons: Then let's tackle this culture head on gotspoons: do either of you have suggestions on how we could go about that, so I'm not dominating the conversation handicapable: You're not the one who dominates the conversation ihatemyguts: Don't think we need to @ people with specific comments like that ihatemyguts: not speaking for myself brainpain: @ me, baby brainpain: At least then I could defend myself brainpain: 🤐 though ihatemyguts: You've got the floor, like tigerbalm: It's not a safe space for Lauren if she can't say what she wants to say at risk of being accused of dominating the chat tigerbalm: either you want people to feel listened to or you don't ihatemyguts: And yeah, I am new, but I know Lauren, or anyone else in the chat rn, would not shoot you down if you wanted to change topic enablednotdisabled: It's about who always seems to be dictating the topic enablednotdisabled: we could change it, but then you feel like an interloper ihatemyguts: The conversation has to start somewhere, by someone ihatemyguts: @handicapable admitted to barely logging in now, of course the people who are here more will talk more, that's a given, it doesn't mean you're not allowed to contribute or come in to the convo ihatemyguts: there's no way to avoid that...prompts? mods only? that's not natural, or practical inandout: bible quotes inandout: 1 Peter 5:10 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Why are we quoting scripture? inandout: Lauren's been here for like 2 years but suddenly she's a disruptive force tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Well that's bullshit tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: unless you're a incel on her stream brainpain: you know me brainpain: how was your open day, babe? brainpain: (unless I'm a domineering b word for asking) tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Decent, despite the fact no one was expecting the wheelchair kid tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: despite the fact I called ahead tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: you can dominate me all you want but let me catch up with this apparent shitstorm I've missed brainpain: what a sexy proposition brainpain: I knew I'd missed you enablednotdisabled: Right, that's that conversation over then enablednotdisabled: 👌 brainpain: come on, man ihatemyguts: This is ridiculous ihatemyguts: people have formed meaningful relationships here, they're not allowed to acknowledge that in case someone feels left out, if you've talked to plenty of other people about the state of this forum, then clearly you've formed deeper bonds with them too ihatemyguts: no one here begrudges you that ihatemyguts: you're bound to get on with certain people over others, there's nothing discriminatory about that, it's to be expected tigerbalm: Like, are we supposed to take everything to PMs now? Cos I wanna hear about Rich's open day too but maybe he doesn't wanna type everything out to separate people lots of separate times ihatemyguts: ^You're just being rude, for the sake of it ihatemyguts: Rosie has offered to privately message about this, or you can put it all in an email to the mods tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Okay tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: literally, 'we' (I'll include myself in this core group that you see, even if I don't see that as a valid argument), have done nothing to you two, have never excluded either of you tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: everyone here is welcoming, and was welcoming you before your complaints tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: which aren't rooted in anything I can see as factual tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: what's the actual issue here? you're just hitting out buzzwords handicapable: and you're just jumping to the defence of the girl you like flirting with brainpain: Whoa now! That's not all I am in here tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: See, that's multiple times you've personally made jabs at Lauren tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: none of us have made any comments on you two personally tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it seems like you're more cliquey than us if you can't see her as a valued member of the group brainpain: I'm not gonna leave cos you want on Rich for being hot af brainpain: shoutout to the new girl for letting that be known though tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Thank you, m'dear (somewhere between 🎩 and 🧢) tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but thanks for implying I'm so desperate that I'd flirt with a girl I'd never seen before @handicapable tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: things are not quite that bad, I can assure you inandout: we're all that desperate, where have we heard that before? inandout: @normal people tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and we don't deserve any relationships that are deeper than strictly clinical and professional inandout: which is why we don't need to talk to any one person more than once tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Shout your grievances into the void and move on tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but don't be too depressing about it ihatemyguts: This group doesn't work, you're right, just not for the reasons you're giving ihatemyguts: but we're all welcome to do what we must about making it work, even if I disagree with yours personally ihatemyguts: at least we try, and if you view us as an 'us' then you also view yourself as a group ihatemyguts: which isn't how I see it, or it's meant to be ihatemyguts: it's a group as a whole inandout: I wanted to organise a meet up to make things cooler inandout: sometimes you don't wanna shout shit into the void inandout: you wanna look someone in the eye when you're talking to them inandout: so you don't have to feel othered ihatemyguts: ^^ inandout: I get to do things with all my other friends inandout: that's what you guys are tigerbalm: I don't have other friends, I'm not saying it to make anyone 😿 tigerbalm: but I don't tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: you've got us tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and we don't need to apologize for being friends tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and I think meeting up is a really good idea, I'll be happy to help brainpain: It's okay, Robyn, none of us have done anything wrong gotspoons: I've contacted the moderators, I'll let you know when I get a response brainpain: I did too ✌️ gotspoons: Good, everyone who feels they need to, should gotspoons: I'm glad your open-day went well, Rich brainpain: me too, hot 🤓 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Thanks, guys tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it's got potential tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: once I get there and make some changes, of course tigerbalm: 🙌 You go, Rich! 🧡 tigerbalm: not to use a banned word but you do inspire me for when I get to uni myself tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: We'll allow it, well I will because I love a compliment tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and you'll be great when you do tigerbalm: I hope my parents won't make me stay local tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: If you don't want to, you shouldn't tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: don't let anything stop you tigerbalm: I'll try not to tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: when you need them, I can throw all the resources and info at you tigerbalm: thanks brainpain: Can we talk about me now cos that's the ONLY reason I'm here LMAO ihatemyguts: @Zach, gonna come at her with your famous line? inandout: you've built it up now ihatemyguts: 🙄 ugh, baby inandout: are we at pet names? cool ihatemyguts: 😂 shut up ihatemyguts: but don't, all voices welcome inandout: yours is dragon ball z inandout: for today ihatemyguts: romantic ihatemyguts: we're meant to be talking about Lauren inandout: Lauren's is low blow ihatemyguts: got a real talent, kid ihatemyguts: may as well do the entire group inandout: wouldn't wanna exclude anyone ihatemyguts: 😏 ihatemyguts: no one will be devastated about that, trust me inandout: damn inandout: or dang ihatemyguts: is that another group rule I've shamelessly flouted? 😬 brainpain: It's a me rule, dragon ball brainpain: you're safe in this safe space ihatemyguts: I'll do my best to mind my Ps & Qs ihatemyguts: 🤞 brainpain: you're fine I'm just aware of my 👵 status brainpain: don't wanna spook the 👶s ihatemyguts: thoughtful ihatemyguts: 👌 brainpain: who knew? brainpain: check me out, not being a huge b word ihatemyguts: honestly, disappointing brainpain: @ my exes ihatemyguts: they aren't here, are they ihatemyguts: @fibro not included brainpain: only my next brainpain: when I snag Rich for myself brainpain: gotta tame that playboy ihatemyguts: so many 💔💔💔 @ this news brainpain: long as you're not brainpain: he's too old for you, babe tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I feel used tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and yes, much too 👴 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: be your ex-husband at this rate brainpain: I'm not gonna say, you can use me too, in front of the children brainpain: but mutual love & respect, boy tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Shocking behaviour, Mrs brainpain: asking for discipline would also be over the line, sir gotspoons: OKAY gotspoons: putting a stop to this convo thank you gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: 😳 gotspoons: have I covered it? brainpain: g dang it, Rich! Have I not been involved in enough controversy for one day? brainpain: turn away from me, you sexy beast gotspoons: you're very cute but terrible gotspoons: ogre princess putting her foot down on this one tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I'll take the blame tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: rushing to your defense again brainpain: 😍 ihatemyguts: sure wish someone would run in and change the topic ihatemyguts: it's like mum and dad have had too much 🍷 inandout: could be a prime time for you to ask Robbie on your first date, dbz ihatemyguts: Oh yeah! 💡 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 💘 is in the air tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: careful, Zach ihatemyguts: Robyn, have you decided what you're gonna wear to your party yet? tigerbalm: I have a moodboard tigerbalm: would you like to see it? ihatemyguts: Um, absolutely tigerbalm: [that moodboard] ihatemyguts: So, you'd be up for going into town to try-on stuff, right? ihatemyguts: I can think of some shops with some unique stuff tigerbalm: 😺!!! ihatemyguts: Is that a yes 😺 or a I'm calling the police 😺? tigerbalm: I'd love to tigerbalm: my parents might call the police though ihatemyguts: that's alright, I've given you a fake name tigerbalm: they would think so tigerbalm: but their name choices are pretty boring ihatemyguts: at least you've got a super cute name ihatemyguts: if it'd make them feel better though, I'll come meet them or whatever tigerbalm: oh thanks x2 tigerbalm: that's so nice ihatemyguts: 'course ihatemyguts: who doesn't like shopping? inandout: I don't inandout: that much ihatemyguts: that'll be why you didn't ask yourself inandout: I would never third wheel your date inandout: very uncool ihatemyguts: well, if anyone does wanna come along, that'd be alright brainpain: happy to invite myself into any convo or situation ihatemyguts: 🤓 or 😎 ihatemyguts: you could do our makeup ihatemyguts: because not joking about the trainwreck it is when I do ihatemyguts: 🤡 not the theme brainpain: to avoid a spooky 🤡 resurge brainpain: I shall gotspoons: 😱😱😱😱 gotspoons: I hate clowns tigerbalm: SAME! my brothers love the 🤡🎈 films but I can't watch 🙀 gotspoons: Nooooooo gotspoons: even the advert was scary tigerbalm: ever since I went to the 🎪🐘🤡🍿 as a child I'm like traumatised inandout: once I got dragged along when my parents went shopping for a sofa and there was a clown there inandout: as a mascot or something gotspoons: 😭 THAT'S HORRIFYING inandout: fever dreams are made of this inandout: he kept trying to ruffle my hair ihatemyguts: definitely a bad omen ihatemyguts: that clown was there to warn you about...something inandout: I'm not classing it as a date though, you still get to go first inandout: the warning'll simply be my impending death ihatemyguts: your first bad omen ihatemyguts: n'awh inandout: cute, right? ihatemyguts: 🐭 🐹 🐰 inandout: 🐿🦔 ihatemyguts: 🦄 brainpain: sure, I'll chaperone you two brainpain: ✨ ihatemyguts: result brainpain: arms length, Zachary gotspoons: I feel like I'm on a dating site brainpain: there'd be way more fibros if we were gotspoons: I've never even attempted to date gotspoons: such a minefield brainpain: if you change your mind, I'll get my sister to list off which ones to avoid brainpain: she feeds me a new spooky story weekly gotspoons: see, it's bad enough without the added 'who I am' drama brainpain: get yourself a love interest with more 🚑💊💉 drama than you, that's what I do brainpain: you're the chill one by comparison gotspoons: Rich is still here lurking, you know 🤭 brainpain: he knows what we have is deep + meaningful tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 👌 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: very serious brainpain: I'm coaching Rosie for her first venture into dating not discussing our lengthy but ultimately doomed love affair tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: doomed because 💀💀 or doomed because someone will join the group with ultimate 🚑💊💉 drama and better hair? brainpain: @Zach with that death clock bs brainpain: doomed cos you'll meet a hot 🤓 at uni brainpain: nobody has better hair than either of us tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Okay then, I won't be pre-offended and call you out on that nonsense brainpain: that isn't a promise that you'll still have time for me brainpain: we're all waiting, Rich tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: depends how hot and how nerdy this university girl is, of course brainpain: Profess your undying love for me or get out, honestly tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 😏 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Rosie will shut it down again brainpain: 😉 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: She's a hater 💔 gotspoons: 😱 Rich! gotspoons: I'm very supportive brainpain: LOL gotspoons: 😥 gotspoons: I love love brainpain: you're a 🧸 brainpain: I love you, Rosemary brainpain: feel free to ignore my husband gotspoons: I ❤️ 🧡 💛 💚 💙 💜 you all too gotspoons: even if you test my nerves sometimes, it's only in a good way 😅 tigerbalm: So, if one of us had a 'normal' crush, would that be doomed? tigerbalm: asking for a friend 😳 gotspoons: OF COURSE NOT gotspoons: you're beautiful gotspoons: spill spill! tigerbalm: there isn't much to say except his running route goes past my house tigerbalm: we've 👋 at each other but no conversation has happened gotspoons: HOW EXCITING ihatemyguts: You've gotta talk to him ihatemyguts: such a meet-cute tigerbalm: I have no idea what I would say ihatemyguts: a hello to go with the 👋 to start ihatemyguts: you'll know what to do tigerbalm: a 'how are you?' to follow but what then? ihatemyguts: something like...you run this route often? ihatemyguts: do you run anywhere else? ihatemyguts: are you single? tigerbalm: 🐱 gotspoons: Oh! gotspoons: What does he look like? gotspoons: Can you take a picture? gotspoons: No, perhaps not gotspoons: I've got snap happy now 😅 tigerbalm: I'll try if I can do it without anyone else noticing tigerbalm: it's okay if my cat judges me, but no humans tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I cannot officially endorse this behaviour, ladies tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: but I'm sure he would be very flattered and consider himself lucky, Robyn tigerbalm: Oh Rich, you're such a big softie 😸 brainpain: LMAO brainpain: forget the boy, I want pics of your cat tigerbalm: [cat pics] 🧡 inandout: that is a potentially judgemental looking moggy, be careful tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: girl or boy? tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: he or she is very distinguished looking, I feel tigerbalm: me & my mum were feeling outnumbered, so she got adopted too tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: fight the power ✊ tigerbalm: I have rabbits too but they would probably encourage me, they're pretty naughty tigerbalm: for fairness tigerbalm: [rabbit pics] brainpain: I had 🐭🐭 as a kid brainpain: LOVED those critters brainpain: [picture of kiddo Lauren with mice on her shoulders] ihatemyguts: I wish I was allowed pets with fur ihatemyguts: scales only inandout: I'm not either inandout: my brother's allergic ihatemyguts: maybe we have the same brother ihatemyguts: slightly concerned now inandout: yours isn't as old as mine, we know that inandout: unless some kind of freaky time loop or something has happened ihatemyguts: I'm you in a parallel universe inandout: before I agree to co-sign, do you have any pets with scales? ihatemyguts: 🐉 🐲 inandout: cool inandout: I accept our parallel lives ihatemyguts: [pics of your dragons 'cos probably have one each lowkey] inandout: if I'm the only petless one in the "core" I will have to hang my head ihatemyguts: you can have joint custody ihatemyguts: don't worry inandout: pet names + a pet share? What a day ihatemyguts: v generous inandout: I'm making that discovery ihatemyguts: 🎁🔍 inandout: I wish we were doing a treasure hunt inandout: that's gonna be date 4 ihatemyguts: challenge accepted ihatemyguts: you gotta find the treasure outside then rehide it though ihatemyguts: more fun inandout: rules accepted ihatemyguts: if you happen to find 💰💎🏺🧭🔮🧿📿 then we'll bury it inandout: what happens if I find a 🗝? ihatemyguts: #5 finding the 🚪 or 🔓 it fits brainpain: Wait, how many dates am I chaperoning you 👶🤓s for? brainpain: gotta find a ✏️ to write this down ihatemyguts: technically, Zach wants to wait 'til he's not 🔞 ihatemyguts: unless you're well dedicated to protect and serve ihatemyguts: also plenty of time to lose that 📄 inandout: don't listen to her, the first date is Robbie's party and we've all 📅 ihatemyguts: might be a double date ihatemyguts: 💃🏃 tigerbalm: I'm so happy that you're both coming! tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Of course they're not missing the event of the season tigerbalm: 😸😺 tigerbalm: I better plan some more tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: It is your forte tigerbalm: compliments are yours tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: and hair tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: humility, less so brainpain: I can vouch for that being why we're soulmates tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: it's the way you can dominate a conversation tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: like a girl with something to say brainpain: 😏 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Tease brainpain: you'd be into it if I were tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: now she speaks 🤫 tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: If Rosie isn't sleeping she'll be 😖 brainpain: I know how to behave, you're the bad influence here tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Gladly take that reputation tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: much worse could be said about me brainpain: catch that 2nd wave of drama when the haters log back in tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: I hope so brainpain: only cos you missed the kick off tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: Not taking politics for nothing brainpain: they can 🔫 @ me if it means you get your 🎓 babe tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: long as I can 🛡 without being fibro about it brainpain: you did tooexhaustedtolivevicariously: 👍 gotspoons: I was thinking gotspoons: maybe if we make more boards for specific topics, that would be better? gotspoons: then the chat could be just that, a casual chat that isn't necessarily disability related but us related, as people gotspoons: what do you guys think? brainpain: I'm in inandout: me too inandout: I was gonna make a similar suggestion but it was my last idea that started everything earlier gotspoons: It's not your fault, Zach gotspoons: I just need to do some admin, update the site tigerbalm: I can help if you need any gotspoons: Thanks, Robbie

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evansrogerskitten · 6 years ago

Text

New Orleans

sub!Dean x OFC

Dean stumbles upon an old memory.

Created for @spnkinkbingo Square Filled: Dom/sub

Warnings: NSFW, 18+, dom/sub, BDSM, restraints, smut WC: 676 On AO3 A/N: Obvs none of these images are mine. I tried to find the original source for the manip in the top corner, I’d be happy to give them credit. Thanks as always to my beta @letsby

My SPN Kink Bingo | My SPN Masterlist

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“So get this, I think I’ve tracked it to a library in New Orleans.” Sam launches into a description of the cursed Cajun object they’re tracking but Dean’s not listening.

For some reason his brain has spit out a memory he hasn’t thought of in a long time. He can’t believe it’s been thirteen years. A lot can happen in over a decade of death and terror.

“Dean?”

“What?” Dean responds gruffly, the accelerator pedal shifting under his boot.

“So I was saying about the first victim that...” Sam’s rambles on again but Dean is staring at the road ahead.

Dean remembers that night very well. It was 2005 and god, he’d been in way over his head. He’d just finished up the job in New Orleans, Dad wasn’t answering his calls, and Dean was starting to worry that maybe he should just suck it up and go to California and find Sam. But then his buddy Richie called, said he was a promoter at a new club and Dean should come to the opening. Last thing Richie said when he got off the line was, “Oh and Dean, clean up little and wear a nice black suit.”

That should’ve been a red flag. But Dean was twenty-six and cocky as hell, so when he arrived at the brand new club decorated in red lights, smoky shadows, and black marble he grabbed a beer and started chatting up a redhead. She was older, late thirties, and after a drink and a dirty bump and grind on the dance floor, she introduced him to a couple of her friends and invited him to a private party in a back room.

Dean blushes slightly as he remembers the rest. What was the woman’s name? Cherry? Sherry? She called the shots. The Cuban twins, Dean doesn’t even know if he got their names. There was a lot of good stuff at first, really good stuff, just sitting back and licking salt off each other’s tequila covered lips before roaming fingers peeled off his suit. Yeah, that night was a first for a lot of things.

All these years later, he can still remember the struggle and then the freedom in deciding to give up control. The sex toys the women played with while he watched. The round bed Cherry Sherry restrained him to, snaps clipping into place. The slaps on his skin that stung so perfectly good he wept, wanting more. The orgasms that made him so high he trembled. He loved feeling weak under her, even though even he knew he had the strength to stop it. It was all too good. He didn’t understand the escape they’d shown him that night until he was much older.

He admits to himself that even under his killer alpha exterior there’s a submissive in him that was released that night. He owned it, letting her lead him, giving her the power even though he could stop it all in one sacred syllable. His tongue rolls over that word silently now, his own secret safety if there had been a need again since then. After the last decade of stress and agony and the weight of the world bearing down on his shoulders- god, sometimes he wished he could give all that power over to someone again. Find that mix of pleasure and pain where he didn’t have to be the hero, didn’t have to be The Dean Winchester. Somewhere he could just consensually be at someone else’s mercy and find a safe space in that surrender. He wanted that chance again to trust someone else to test his limits and bring him back to zero.

“Dude,” Sam insists, getting his attention back. "What do you think about the plan?"

“What?” Dean grunts, looking up from the weary highway. He adjusts in his seat, realizing he’s getting hard from the memory. Whips and restraints have never been his thing, but New Orleans...Dean bites his lip and cranks up a Bad Company anthem on the radio. New Orleans was something else.

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Thanks for your love and support, my stars!

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Do not copy and paste my writing anywhere without my consent. This work is property of evansrogerskitten. Characters aren’t mine, but this fanfiction is. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. 10/13/18

#spnkinkbingo #spnfanficpond #Dean Winchester #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #dean x OFC #Dean x OCs #Dean Winchester x OFC #Dean Winchester x OCs #kinky Dean

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zenosanalytic · 5 years ago

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HoXPoX Liveblog: Powers of X #2

So I’m FINALLY continuing my readthrough of HoXPoX, and I’m liveblooging it on my twitter, so I figured I’d cross-post it over here. It’s just gonna be copypastes of my tweets, though I’m also include a link to the first one above the readme for those interested in reading it over there. This starts with PoX#2, as I dont want to scroll months into the past to get the first three down :p :p :p

The Link

ok so I'm gonna FINALLY restart my HoXPoX Readthrough. It's Powers of X #2!(I've got, like, a 4th printing, so no symbolically significant cover to talk about; sorry :p)

Ok so opening quote is about the "gap" btw Xavier and Magneto. Given that the premise of the series is Moira using her memories to bring them together I predict the quote will be proven wrong, but We Shall See u_u

So we open on the X^0 period, year 1, in Moira's 10th life; the same year as Moira's meeting with Xavier at the fair. They're in the Bermuda Triangle, at Island M; Magneto's island base.

Island M is a bit of XMen lore I don't know much about; it seems to be dominated by an ancient ruin which, I'm guessing from the architecture, is Atlantean; though it'd be more in keeping with Mutant deep-lore if it were an old Deviant or Inhuman settlement.

the colors are primarily Green and Gold, so symbolically Knowledge, Power, Something New, with Magneto a deep purple and red shadow; He's representing Mutation here.

this actl raising an interesting duality btw the two I've never considered(though it's obvs and textural so I should have)? Like: Magneto exploring the Otherness of Mutanthood while Xavier explores the Humanity of it.

Ok this is such a cool visual I want to share it to discuss it: So they're side-by-side and the same height(Mags' billowing cape makes him SLIGHTLY taller, which is Hilarious) but Moira's drawn looking *up*, but she's abt to drop a bombshell on him we know; Irony, man uwu

Moira: "Who decides what is truly good and what truly evil?" Mags; Of Course: "*missing no beat* idoidecidethat :|" XD XD XD

Xavier asks him to trust him, Mags takes off his helmet(his Otherness) and there, suddenly, is his Humanity(his face). The Symbolism is obvs: By Trusting them he embraces his Human-Aspect and thus his Self, through doing this he allows a Connection btw them all.

On the last page Moira talking abt her Mutation-derived knowledge is framed in orange-gold; On this one, Xavier creating a mental link between Moira, Himself, and Magneto is similarly framed; this may be a motif going forward.

I love how youthful Magneto looks after this revelation, and how alien(I'd say elven) Xavier looks after having shared it with him.

LOOK AT THIS ELVEN-ASS ELROND LOOKING MOTHERFUCKER!

There's a cool thing going on with the 2nd frame of this page, where the darkness of Moira's black shirt -with grey highlights not unlike comic depictions of panther musculature- mirrors the Othering Darkness of Magneto in full-kit.

X1 Year 10 Krakoa. Xavier is reviewing plans for the Mother Mold orbiting the Sun with Cyclops(along with an ORCHIS dossier, the info Mystique, Toad, and Sabertooth stole). Look at Summers being a little sardonic, smiling Quipster-shit here ^v^

Xavier believes this ORCHIS plot is the seed for Nimrod, and thus MUST be stopped(of course, we know this will, at best delay it given X2; is he lying to Cyclops abt the objective here?)

Mags: "Can it be done?" Cyclops: "Does it need to?" Xavier: "Yes" Cyclops: "Then It WILL be" Badassssss

The dominant color for these scenes is Gold, so knowledge obvsl(they're briefing him), but also safety, power, and cycles. Far from interrupting a phase in the cycle, I think this event may be initiating one.

now to X2, picking up where we left them last on Asteroid K. Hmm so this seems NOT to be Wolverine, but a descendant of him, and Apocalypse is the last surviving leader of Earth's mutants.

So it seems they stole an "indexing machine", which allow them to actl find the thing they're looking for in the archives(apprntl the sentinels archive everything). Nimrod killed the two humans who reported it to him to keep this a secret.

Ok I think the person I thought was a Groot might actl be Cypher merged with what remains of Krakoa.

#Marvel #X Men #HoXPoX #Hickman et al #HoXPoX Liveblog #Powers of X 2 #Powers of X #zA Liveblogs

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ahouseoflies · 6 years ago

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The Best Films of 2018, Part II

Part I is here. Let’s keep it moving. ENDEARING CURIOSITIES WITH BIG FLAWS

103. Zama (Lucretia Martel)- In this movie there's a motif of Zama, an officer of the 18th century Spanish Empire, starting a scene by talking to someone or staring at someone off camera. After a minute or two, the camera cuts to some servant and disorients us. There's a person there, always there, to serve him, and it doesn't really matter who it is. It's a brilliant way to get at the colonialism that the character depends on but is still trapped by. So I get a little bit of what the film is trying to do, but it's boring. I'm an ignorant person who doesn't know how to watch Lucretia Martel's films or have any context for South American history, but I know what boring is. 102. I Feel Pretty (Abby Kohn and Marc Silverstein)- I like that Schumer tried something different instead of falling back on her persona, but there isn't enough new or interesting here for me to recommend--besides National Treasure Michelle Williams, of course. The film nearly displays "Do you see that she's turning her back on her real friends now?" on the screen. 101. A Simple Favor (Paul Feig)- At times cheeky and sexy and juicy, but it still wears out its welcome by twists ninety-one and ninety-two. 100. Double Lover (Francois Ozon)- Diverting until it gets silly, then so silly that it gets diverting again. There are about five too many twists, and I'm still unclear on how seriously the film takes any of those twists. More importantly, I don't think there's much of a takeaway from any of it. Ozon seems to have found a real muse in Marine Vacth though. 99. Borg Vs. McEnroe (Janus Metz Pedersen)- As a Shia Pet, I felt obligated to see his portrayal of Johnny Mac. I didn't learn anything that I didn't already know from this mediocre biopic though. Watch the documentary McEnroe/Borg: Fire & Ice instead. 98. Ralph Breaks the Internet (Rich Moore and Phil Johnston)- There's some clever visualization of the the Internet, such as the way that a link shuttles an avatar off in a transparent car or the way that shady newsboy types whisper about pop-up ads. And I liked a lot of the Disney tie-in stuff that critics are wincing at. As far as textbook screenwriting goes, it's great at that idea of making you think that the protagonists will accomplish their goal very easily, only to have them be re-directed to square one. The voice acting is top-notch. Why do these movies get so plotty though? I felt as if the internal logic started getting inconsistent about halfway through--at the same time that the first one got bogged down with candy stuff instead of 8-bit video game stuff. And if there are so many lovable characters from the first entry, why do we get such tiny servings of them here? The movie's too long already, but what I wouldn't give for an occasional cut back to Fix-It Felix raising some kids.

97. We the Animals (Jeremiah Zagar)- The Tree of Life is one of my favorite movies, and on its face, We the Animals is a really similar impressionistic memory. So why do I like it half as much? Are lighting and music that important? Is Jessica Chastain? Is latent racism? All I know is that this felt like a story I had seen before pitched at the same intensity for a running time I was happy to see expire. 96. Kodachrome (Mark Raso)- The three leads are all pretty good. (Ed Harris does this bashful, pulling-on-his-eyelid thing that killed me.) But with mathematical precision, the film matched each element I liked with another thing that infuriated me. Specifically, the whole plot hinges on one scene, and that scene is preposterous and alien to human behavior. 95. Deadpool 2 (David Leitch)- The pacing of these movies is bizarre to me; they're half-over before they really get started. No one else is bothered by the fact that Cable has no motivation or backstory for the first hour? Some of the connections to X-Men felt more forced this time around, but I thought this entry was much funnier than the first, even mixing in some more subtle visual gags. (The exotic locales montage ending in Biloxi really got me.) I have to give credit to the X-Force parachute sequence, which is audacious and unexpected. And clear out for Zazie Beetz, who is a huge star in the making. 94. At Eternity’s Gate (Julian Schnabel)- Something about Van Gogh was essentially unknowable, which is a great reason to make a movie about him and a terrible reason to make a movie about him. I'm not sure that Julian Schnabel got to the bottom of the man any better than anyone else has, though maybe that's an unfair expectation. To his credit, Schnabel yada-yadas the ear business and Van Gogh's death in favor of his more poetic understanding of the artistic life. The movie doesn't coalesce for me, but there's a banger of a scene between Dafoe and Mads Mikkelsen about the responsibility an artist has toward God. That short nested inside makes the whole thing worth seeing. The conversation I had afterwards with one of the two other people in the theater, an art historian, was a solid three stars. 93. Bohemian Rhapsody (Bryan Singer)- Some biographical movies do a good job of compressing time, and their supporting characters don't feel sacrificed or glossed over. For many other mediocre ones though, including this one, I submit the Three Scene Rule. Three scenes is kind of the minimum for a character to register an arc and for an actor to present any kind of dynamic performance, so in a lot of these true story movies, that's all that a supporting character gets. If you're looking for it, it's glaring. (Watch Hidden Figures again with the husband and boyfriend characters in mind. I'll wait.) This movie has a few characters that matter: Freddie Mercury, obvs; the other Queen members; Paul Prenter, the unfairly composited villain; and Mary Austin, the platonic love of Mercury's life. The movie spends way too much time on her, as if to tease the audience with the idea that Freddie might be straight. As for everyone else? Three scenes. Ray Foster, the record executive played by Mike Myers (!): A. "Look, guys, I like formulas. This opera stuff you're talking about? That sounds crazy." B. "The opera stuff is crazy. I ain't making that the single. You can walk out of here for all I care." C. [hangs head in shame after being proven wrong] Jim Hutton, Freddie's partner for the seven years this movie doesn't care about: A. "Look, pal, I may be a waiter, but you can't just grab me like that. On second thought, let's talk. You should learn how to love yourself." B. "Oh, hey. Glad you tracked me down, slugger. You love yourself now? Sure, let's go meet your parents." C. "Guess I'm your boyfriend now. Looking forward to the show." Freddie's Parents: A. "You go out every night! What are you doing out there? Why can't you be a good boy? What's up with your new name?" B. "Why can't you be a good boy? What's up with your new name?" C. "You're a good boy, I guess, even if you're gay. Guess that's your name for real." I like the idea of reproducing the Live Aid performance in full, and the movie comes alive during its musical sequences. But I wish that the same attention given to, like, the number of Pepsi cups on the piano was also given to the nuts and bolts of the storytelling.

92. The Predator (Shane Black)- I get why other people don't like this. The final fourth feels obligatory, and it seems cut to the verge of incoherence. But if you don't get a little tingle out of a game cast saying Shane Black things like, "Predators don't just sit around making hats out of rib cages," then we are very different moviegoers.

91. Sorry to Bother You (Boots Riley)- I admire Boots Riley's ambition, the way he's taking many of the ideas that drove his music and channeling them into film. But there are too many ideas and, strangely, too much plot to cohere. I liked some of the jokes, especially the Robocop-py TV clips laced throughout. I think my main problem, however, is Lakeith Stanfield as Cassius. He's a fascinating actor, but his energy is completely wrong for an everyman lead like this. I don't think he was the right choice to carry it. 90. Thoroughbreds (Cory Finley)- The repartee at the beginning is sharp, and there are some engaging elements of style. God knows I've never complained about rich, sad, nubile brunettes with strange eyes. But there are pieces missing in that forest-for-the-trees way that happens sometimes with debuts. Like, how do these privileged girls not have access to a gun when our national nightmare is based on all young people having access to guns? Or what is the exact motivation behind the crime at the center? Lots of great characters have been spurred by a violent curiosity, but a zinger here and there doesn't make these girls Raskolnikov. 89. White Boy Rick (Yann DeMange)- Even if this isn't it, I think Yann Demange has a great film in him. There's some urgency to White Boy Rick's politics, and it looks interesting. If nothing else, it succeeds in making the surroundings seem as gloomy as the characters all acknowledge them to be. But this isn't a great film in either of its halves. It's motivated by plot until a crucial event that I don't want to reveal, then it veers much more into character. I would normally sign off on that, but this movie grinds to a halt in the change and never recovers. McConaughey pulls his weight, but Richie Merritt is pretty bad in the lead. 88. The Strangers: Prey at Night (Johannes Roberts)- Despite some striking images and a welcome lack of explanation for the menace, Prey at Night doesn't reach the heights of its predecessor, mostly because the characters are too paint-by-numbers. 87. Ant-Man and the Wasp (Peyton Reed)- Probably the first Marvel movie that would benefit from more action. Some of the material is genuinely funny thanks to Michael Pena and Randall Park, but I got a little drowsy during the middle hour of talk about phase-shifting and the quantum realm. Get back to making things big or making things little, Dr. Molecule! 86. Creed II (Steven Caple Jr.)- The pieces are there, but it's a problem when Jim Lampley, who has one hundred times as many lines as the fifth lead, explains to the audience what they literally saw an hour earlier. If nothing else, this movie proves, through his absence, how good of a director Ryan Coogler is. I would be lying if I said I didn't get the chills at some key moments. Stallone’s performance and Jordan's muscles are good. But there was a dark, honest way for this movie to end, and it went directly against that ending into something more Hollywood. 85. Let the Sunshine In (Claire Denis)- Like Taxi Driver if Travis Bickle just wanted the guy to get him a glass of water afterwards. The film does have that kind of myopic focus--the sexy, ever-candid Binoche is in every scene--but it's far more elliptical, progressing only through character, never through plot. Let the Sunshine In is unique in a way that is different from Denis's other unique works: No one talks like an actual person, and she acts as if you should know all of the characters instead of properly introducing them. It's not supposed to be funny ha-ha, so excuse me if that's what I wanted.

84. Revenge (Coralie Fargeat)- like the style of this film, the color palette, the synth score, how far it's willing to go with the gore. But if it's called Revenge, and it's clear who the hero is (hint: not the rapist), then the whole thing feels like a fait accompli. We know exactly who's going to be the last woman standing, and we even know the order of the people she's going to kill.

PRETTY GOOD MOVIES 83. The Rider (Chloe Zhao)- This movie is trying to be a poem, but the parts I like the most are prose. It's a promising piece of filmmaking with heartbreaking moments, but I found it most effective when the storytelling spelled things out. It's an all-hands-on-deck independent film, so the amateurism of the piece shines through in the performances from non-professional actors. The relationship between Brady and his autistic sister is interesting because she speaks with that sarcastic cadence that can be learned from only children's programming. It's unlike what we usually see because, you know, she's a non-professional actor and real autistic person. So what do I know? 82. Unfriended: Dark Web (Stephen Susco)- Pretty tight from a storytelling standpoint and definitely grisly enough to get under the skin. But these laptop flicks move with such alacrity that it's hard to believe them whenever they ask you to buy something like love, since they paint it with the broadest strokes imaginable. Not that I would want a two-hour version of this anyway. 81. Juliet, Naked (Jesse Peretz)- Charming enough, arriving at a more realistic place than I expected, Juliet, Naked does nothing to make me revoke my charter membership in the Rose Byrne fan club. What an odd shape this film has though. The inciting incident happens at the hour mark, and it races obligatorily to an ending at an hour, thirty-seven. 80. Ocean’s Eight (Gary Ross)- It sets its marks and hits them adequately, with most of the charm that made the other Ocean movies fun. But there's something lifeless about Ocean's 8, both in the direction and the score. Take, for example, Richard Armitage's bland, sort of lost performance as an old flame/mark. It's such a nothing part that I began to think that it was a thesis: The men are just chess pieces, and they shouldn't take attention away from the women this time. But then James Corden emerges in the last half-hour and shines. So maybe Armitage was just bad and directed poorly? This movie exists for the Movie Star interplay though, and it delivers on that level. Cate Blanchett was good for so long that she's popular, and Sandra Bullock was popular for so long that she's good. Rihanna has to dress like a janitor at one point as a disguise, and she proves how absurd it would be for her to ever blend in. Anne Hathaway is the funniest of the bunch, balancing on a highwire of how big she's supposed to seem. Helena Bonham Carter gets the "and" hammer for all my credit fetishists. 79. Mary Poppins Returns (Rob Marshall)- I saw this on Christmas night with my family. The original Mary Poppins was the first movie my mom ever saw in theaters, and it's probably my wife's favorite. To the extent that insulting it is kind of insulting an important part of who she is. So I couldn't be the guy coming out of the theater like, "The Bankses definitely deserved to lose their house." Between you and me though, it's just fine. Entire sequences could be cut without damaging anything--do we ever come back to the bowl that Meryl Steep is supposed to be mending?--and most of the conflict feels manufactured. These legasequels always end up feeling like boxes being checked. We all know that the guys with the cannon had to come back, right? But some of the numbers are so joyful or stirring that even this grinch snuck a few smiles at his daughter as she pointed to the screen and said, "That's so silly." It's a good movie to see on Christmas night with your whole family. 78. RBG (Betsy West, Julie Cohen)- This movie is designed to make the viewer who would seek it out go, "What an American hero." It does that, I suppose, and there isn't a whole lot wrong with it. Yes, she is a very impressive person. But the film has too much untapped potential and too few teeth to recommend beyond that rubric of achieving its goals. For example, what about half of the population that would sneer at the notion that Ruth Bader Ginsburg is an American hero? Besides the inclusion of some radio clips over the credits, the filmmakers aren't concerned. "Look, she was friends with a conservative!"

77. Searching (Aneesh Shaganty)- Since I've seen thousands of movies that don't take place inside of a computer, there's still some novelty to the handful that do. On one hand, there are four or five twists too many, and the film isn't consistent with its own rules. On the other hand, it gets intriguingly dark for PG-13, and it never stops moving. 76. Uncle Drew (Charles Stone III)- The attitude toward women is retrograde, and to call the plot cookie-cutter would be an understatement. But this works, mostly because of the sunny, natural performances. Kyrie Irving, whose handles are even more of a marvel on a forty-foot screen, has to act through pounds of makeup, but he pulls it off. With only commercials to his name, he has to carry scenes of, like, standing at someone's grave and apologizing, and he has the presence and confidence to do it. I also should mention that Nick Kroll has a nothing-to-lose, galaxy brain performance for which probably zero of the lines were written ahead of time. "Shout-out to Oberto, shout-out to Aleve, the number one pain reliever in the game right now." I have to extend some of the credit here to Charles Stone III, who has made a calling card out of coaxing performances from newcomers. 75. Christopher Robin (Marc Forster)- Cute. 74. Unsane (Steven Soderbergh)- What seems to be a B-movie hitting its marks gets elevated by one fantastic scene that makes it seem timely and vital. I can't help but think Steven Soderbergh is punching below his weigh class though. I'm glad that an experiment like shooting a movie with an iPhone gets him up in the morning, and I know he doesn't want to make another Traffic or Out of Sight. But maybe, here's an idea, audiences might? 73. 22 July (Paul Greengrass)- The first thirty minutes are harrowing, in part because of their disciplined cross-cutting and Anders Danielsen Lie's chilling stoicism. The mistake that Greengrass makes is thinking that, later on, the three strands of story are equal in importance. He cuts away from the court case at its apex to see a kid trying to walk again or a prime minister demanding that his administration get tougher. Some moments are powerful, and Greengrass's composition and editing have mercifully softened, but this becomes a grind at a certain point. 72. Solo: A Star Wars Story (Ron Howard)- I hate to state the obvious, but this feels like multiple movies stitched together because that's exactly what it is. On one hand, we have the foggy opening, featuring an airtight inciting incident and setting up Emilia Clarke as that rarest of things in a Star Wars movie: a character with unclear motivations. But as the film goes on, it reveals why Han doesn't work as a protagonist. (Ehrenreich is bad, but the storytelling sinks the movie more than his performance does.) Everyone else in the movie drips with charisma and comments on the action while Han is left to connect the dots. In other words, the other characters get to be Han Solo, and Han Solo doesn't. By the time we get to the marauders, past the two hour mark of a movie that shouldn't have been more than two hours, the narrative crumbles under its own weight. These movies are way too competent to fail--I can list five or six moments that transcend the flaws--but each of these origin stories has a way of erasing the myth of Star Wars with a pen. 71. Bird Box (Susanne Bier)- This is a genre film that you've seen before in one way or another, so your expectations (and filmgoing experience even?) will dictate what you think of it. There's a metaphorical reading available, but that doesn't make the picture more artful automatically. Trevante Rhodes is a Movie Star. Here's what I can tell you: We need to appreciate John Gavin Malkovich while we can. Delivering the apotheosis of the selfish dickhead survivor character, he a) asks why the group can't stay in the grocery store forever, b) points shotguns at people when they try to let in strangers, c) drinks as he's telling people matter-of-factly that this is the end of the world, and d) (sort of) explains why he is the way he is. And-he-does-it-all-with-the-deliberate-cadence-that-you-are-doing-in-your-HEAD-right-NOW. I'm not saying the guy should win Best Supporting Actor or anything, but I admire his career more than any that would get a Best Supporting Actor.

#film #lists #movie reviews

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