#i have a feeling that the production team is. scared?

[moltenapian]

> assuming the dom is a man

> assuming the dom is doing it because they like to see the sub suffer instead of doing it purely as an exercise in making their sub feel good in the ways that best work for them

Like fr

Not to get too personal on main but I've been pretty seriously SAd fairly continuously over a period of about five years of my life. Without going into details, it's led to pretty serious drives to self-harm. More beneath the cutoff of you want to read, I guess. It's late so I'm going to be very personal.

Drives that have been rewarded by society at large, in fact. Exercising 25 hours a week on less than 1800 calories a day, while it absolutely ruined my body in the long, made me one of the best rowers in my state in the short term. Nobody pulled me aside and told me that it was unhealthy, that I'd hurt myself, that in four years I'd hardly be able to function and certainly not in any high level athletics. No, they just cared I was faster at racing boats than the others.

I sought self harm in a lot of ways, none of which were controlled. Staying up far too late and working much longer hours than I should have. Not eating anywhere near enough in order to maintain my thin figure. All of it, rewarded and encouraged.

Only after some very severe health scares and deep reexamination of my situation did I really truly identify these drives and how they affected me in such an unhealthy manner. I can't get rid of them. After five years of consistent sexual trauma (and otherwise but we don't need to worry about that) those things are rooted too deep to excise.

But now that I'm in a healthy relationship with a partner who is accepting and understanding of my hangups, trauma triggers, and the things which I need to be able to function in a relationship, I've been able to deal with these impulses in a healthy way.

Better to handle that stuff in a scene where absolutely everything is agreed upon by both parties beforehand, safewords are strictly enforced, and nothing gets pushed too too far. Just enough to stop the part of my brain that wants me to hurt to be satiated for a while. My instincts for self harm are almost entirely abated with occasional "rough" sex and bitter drinks (ngl in my experience a very good way to alleviate those feelings).

Anyways, these days I've been sleeping enough, eating enough, and the healthiest and happiest I've ever been in my life. A productive environment to be able to work out those feelings is really invaluable, and I'm glad to have it.

All this goes to say... it sounds like OP either hasn't practiced safe BDSM (which is a very real risk, don't get me wrong) or is simply judging something based on an emotional/moral reaction. Anyways the criticisms really don't hold up, and tbh in 98% of cases competitive sports teams rely on the same dynamics and are wayyyy more unhealthy. I could write a whole essay on this but now is not the time.

This post is stupid as hell and I'm certainly sorry I (and you all) had to see it

not me printing and framing this shit

[cerealandchoccymilk]

im. really really hoping that livio gets a comeback in tristamp season 2 somehow. its possible!! considering his abilities in maximum!!! and he still has that super regen in stampede!! like please. give him back ik you can do it.......

[spikeyjo]

[gotta-winwin]

culinaryclasswars!mingyu x whitespoonchef!reader

a/n: culinary class wars will and always will be my roman empire and i can't help but imagine mingyu as a chef competing...

chef!mingyu already had a large internet following before coming to compete. he was widely known to korean netizens as the "househusband chef," famous for his charming looks and endearing persona.

chef!mingyu only joins the show after much persistence from everyone around him - telling him that it would be perfect to both connect with other chefs and to grow his own craft.

chef!mingyu enters filming the pilot, scared out of his wits at the sheer size of the production and the amount of highly respected chefs around him. as he watches more people walk in, the less he believes he's going to make it very far.

blackspoonchef!mingyu, whose very jaw drops at your entrance, rising up on a platform to greet them. he's always been a big fan of your work and your talent, silently mouthing to himself: she's even prettier in person.

blackspoonchef!mingyu works extra hard in the first challenge because he knows you're watching him. he pulls out all the stops, knowing this might be his only chance to impress you. to get you to notice him. in the end, it's both his intense concentration and skill that draw you closer to his station - and it's the bulging biceps and impressive technique that makes you stay.

blackspoonchef!mingyu, who seems to be silently watching you at all times, although he never approaches you during or after filming. you find yourself watching him back, entranced by his fluidity in the kitchen and the confidence that seems to ooze out of him. all your white spoon chef colleagues agree he's a formidable threat.

blackspoonchef!mingyu, who goes home every night after filming only to return to the kitchen, brainstorming creative recipes that would impress the judges. but most importantly, you. it's you he's thinking about while working, both trying to get your attention and your praise.

blackspoonchef!mingyu, who you quickly befriend during team challenges. he's easygoing and extremely fun to be around, making you crack up between shoots and bringing a permanent smile across your face. you find yourself less stressed whenever he's around.

blackspoonchef!mingyu's dreams are slowly coming true as the two of you grow closer. he's bursting from excitement just to be around you, let alone be your friend! he finds himself waking up fully ready to get back to work - competition stress gone and instead replaced by a bubbling feeling of .... is that love?

blackspoonchef!mingyu who can't help but grin whenever he's watching you compete. it's exhilarating to watch you in your element and all the cameras catch his whipped expression as he watches you intently. the hashtag househusbanddownbad trends on all social media platforms the day that episode airs.

blackspoonchef!mingyu who looks at you like you handcrafted each star and placed them in the sky yourself.

blackspoonchef!mingyu who's the first one up and clapping whenever it's announced that you've won your round, resisting the urge to run over and give you a hug. you're equally smitten as you beam up at him, proud that you've won and happy he's there to witness it.

chef!mingyu who's not beat up about the loss because at least now he can get your number and tell you his actual name. he's got a goofy grin as he watches you input your digits, breathlessly telling you that his name is mingyu. he watches you repeat the name and almost faints at the sound of it coming from you.

chef!mingyu who, despite losing, still visits the set every day to see you. he brings you lunch for your breaks, coffee for early mornings, somehow in tuned with your cravings and your needs. more often than not, he's there to drive you home after a long day of filming and cooking.

chef!mingyu, who is the first person you're looking for when you win.

chef!mingyu, who never ever would have imagined you'd ever like him back lets out a tiny gasp when you run into his open arms, going in for a kiss instead of a hug. he's frozen for a moment before realizing shit i should probably kiss her back. the moment is caught on camera, sending fans reeling at the swoon-worthy moment.

chefboyfriend!mingyu who cannot let you go the entire press tour.

[skzhocomments]

Interview with my Ex - Bang Chan Oneshot Fanfic

General Masterlist

Request me a story

---

Pairing: Bang Chan (Stray Kids) x OC/Reader (Story is written in 2nd person, OC is called Eun-ji)

Genre: light angst, strangers to lovers to exes (to lovers?)

Word Count: 8.8k

Warnings: swearing, non-explicit mentions of mature themes

Summary:

You have been invited to participate in a show titled ‘Interview with my Ex’ together with Bang Chan. Will you go and confront him for breaking up with you one year ago, or will you miss out on this opportunity?

This is just a story that doesn’t describe Bang Chan or other mentioned Stray Kids’ members true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

---

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

© all rights reserved by skzhocomments (Tumblr), skzho (Tumblr)/ storminsidemycore (Wattpad), storminsidemycore (AO3)

---

Interview with my Ex

---

What the heck is this?

Your eyes are stuck on the screen, unable to believe the E-mail you’ve just received.

---

“PROPOSAL to Mrs. Eun-ji Park

You have been invited to participate in our show titled ‘Interview with my Ex’ together with Bang Christopher Chan.

The show is scheduled to be filmed on XX.XX.XXXX. You will be able to talk openly to your ex about your relationship and your break-up through a series of questions we’ve prepared.

Please let us know if you are interested in this proposal and if you are available.

Thank you,

The ‘Truth Behind The Scenes’ Team”

---

Reading through the lines, your eyes widen in shock.

You look up the E-mail address the message came from and find that not only is it legit, but they have a YouTube channel with millions of subscribers, which would explain why your ex – Chan – would be invited to it and would want to participate.

Although you haven’t kept up with what he’s been doing, you know that he is preparing to release an album to launch his solo career, and he’d probably want to promote it as much as possible.

But still, isn’t it a bit cruel to invite you to something like this? Would he really promote this album at your expense, after knowing how much he’s hurt you?

It’s been more than a year since you’ve broken up, but still, your heart still hurts whenever you read his name. You don’t think you’d be able to face him without feeling pain creeping in from every crevice of your body.

You miss him terribly, and ever since he left, you weren’t able to fill the hole he left behind. Once in a while, you wonder if he’s ever tried reaching out and you almost unblock his number, but quickly change your mind because the possibility of talking to him again scares you.

You are scared of your heart swelling up with hope in your chest again, you are scared of confessing that he was the best thing that’s ever happened to you, and you are scared he most likely doesn’t feel the same.

Still, you are curious. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to participate in this show – to talk to him more or less openly about the whys and the hows, so you eventually decide to reply to the message, and you clear up your work schedule for that day.

~

As the day approaches, you get more and more anxious about having to see him. Initially, you decide to dress to the nines, to show him what he’s been missing out on, but the more dresses you try on, the more uncomfortable you feel.

Why should you try to be someone you’re not just to try and impress a man who’s left you?

You shouldn’t.

You don’t care to impress him anymore. You should just be you, and you should wear something you’re feeling good in, even if that’s just a plain black shirt and some matching black jeans and shoes.

You decide to do your make-up as you’d usually do for work – a soft glam paired with a glossy lip balm, and glancing once more in the mirror, you sigh to yourself and get out of your apartment, taking the bus until you reach the address you’ve received in the last message the Truth Behind the Scenes team sent you.

As you reach the filming studio, someone takes you inside a room with a table and two chairs, and Chan is already there with his back turned to you, speaking with someone you don’t recognise.

Your heart skips a beat at the sight of him, and you hesitate for a little while, but eventually decide to approach the table with a soft smile.

“Hey.” You say, and seeing you, Chan immediately stands up and smiles brightly.

“Hey! I wasn’t sure you’d show up.” He chuckles, taking you into a hug, and oh, how much you missed his embrace, even if it’s short.

“Yeah, I wasn’t sure either.” You reply honestly. “But here I am. So, how does this work?”

“Well, I thought we would have a conversation of some sort, but apparently there’s some questions on those cards each of us has to draw from those two boxes-” he points towards the table, “and the other has to reply.”

“I see.” You nod and sit down, and he follows soon after.

The team instructs you to draw the first card, and as you do, you begin reading:

“How did we meet?”

“Oh, alright. Well…”

---

Rubbing his tired eyes, Chan looked in the corner of his computer screen and cursed out loud when he noticed how late it already was.

3:52 AM.

“Shit.” He leaned back and closed his eyes tightly, and when he opened them again, they started stinging.

He rubbed them again while contemplating if he should go back to the dorms or just sleep on the sofa in the studio. Although uncomfortable, it would do until tomorrow at 10 when he’d have to be back to the building.

After some more minutes and deep breaths used to try and calm him down, he eventually decided against sleeping on the sofa and getting God knows how many neck cramps in the morning when he’d wake up.

He got up and shut down his computer and his laptop, of course after making sure a million times that he’s saved the progress made on the track in the past few hours of the night. He had a good feeling about this new song, even though it would probably not see the light of day in a few years.

Still, it’s better to work in advance and be prepared, especially in an industry as competitive as the one he works in.

Walking into the hallway, he eventually reached the elevators and called one of them. He glanced one more time left and right, and made his way inside, thinking of how peaceful the company is so late into the night. This was probably the only thing he enjoyed about staying up late cramped in his studio: the quietness, the emptiness, the fact that he can take the elevator all the way down uninterrupted-

“Oh.” A woman’s voice pulled him out of his trance, as he stood bewildered looking at the elevator’s doors that opened on the 6th floor. “Wasn’t expecting someone else to be up and about at this time.” The woman continued, and Chan smiled out of courtesy.

You got in and pressed the button to close the doors, and the elevator started moving again, until it suddenly came to a halt.

The lights followed, leaving you in complete darkness.

“What the fuck…” Chan mumbled, taking his phone out of his pocket.

What a great day to have 2%.

He turned the flashlight on, nonetheless.

“Is this a blackout?” You contemplated out loud. “Ouch.”

“Oh, I’m sorry!” Chan apologised, putting the flashlight down. He unintentionally blinded the poor woman. “Yeah, I think so.”

“Great.”

“Tell me about it… What do we do?”

“Is there anyone you could call to tell them we’re here? I forgot my phone on my desk. Shit.”

“Yeah, let me try and call my manager. He’ll probably kill me tomorrow morning for interrupting his precious sleep, but he’s our only hope.”

“Okay.”

Chan searched up his manager’s name and dialled his number, but before the call could connect, the phone shut down.

“No more battery.”

“No way. Are you fucking kidding me?” You asked, but despite the harsh words, there was no annoyance in your tone. Instead, Chan was able to hear slight amusement.

“I always charge it.” He mumbled once more under his breath.

“Do you think the power went out in the whole building, or is it just the elevator?”

“Hmm. Not sure. Probably the whole building.”

“So, we’re stuck.” You concluded, and Chris started hearing a slight shuffle. “Might as well be comfortable. I’m down here.”

“On the floor?”

“No, dummy. On the ceiling.” You laughed.

“Okay, okay. It’s 4 AM, be a bit more lenient on me for the stupid questions.” Chan laughed as well and sat down, hoping he wouldn’t accidentally sit on you.

“I’m Eun-ji, by the way.”

“Chris.”

“Nice to meet you, Chris.”

“What are you doing here so late?”

“Same as you, probably. Working.”

“Damn, what department are you in?” He asked, trying to keep the conversation going.

“Financing.” You shrugged, although you knew he wasn’t able to see you.

“I see. I’m from Stray Kids.”

“Yeah, I know.” You chuckled at the absurdity of the situation. Of course you knew, since you were up so late because of this guy and his team’s never-ending resources for their million albums, merch and tours.

“Really? How so?” He asked, as if taken aback.

“Uhm, I mean… you’re one of the stars of the company I work for. It would be kind of weird to not know, don’t you think?” You asked plainly.

“I guess so, yeah…”

“So, do you think we’d be here for long?”

“God, I hope not. I’m so tired I could sleep right here.”

“Do it, then.” You shrugged again. “Do you want to put your head in my lap to be more comfortable?”

“What?”

“I asked, do you want to put your head-”

“No, I heard what you asked.” Chris chuckled. “I was just taken aback.”

“Well, you don’t have to. It was just a solution to the problem.”

“Then, you should be the one to do it and get some sleep, I bet you’re as tired as me.” He countered.

“No, I’m fine. Sure, I’m tired, but I have a day off tomorrow, so I can sleep in once I get home.”

“Oh… do you live far away?”

“Just a couple blocks over.”

“I see.”

“You?”

“Same…”

You hummed and nodded, and the two of you stayed silent for a few moments, until Chris started speaking again.

“So… do you like your job?”

“What?” You chuckled. “That was so random.”

“I’m trying to make conversation!” He retorted.

“I can’t say I dislike it, but I also can’t say I like it. It’s just a means to a way, I guess.”

“Mhm.”

“What about you, Chris? Do you like your job?”

“Yeah, a whole lot.” He smiled, and although you couldn’t see it, you heard it from the tone of his voice.

“Isn’t it stressful, though?”

“It is, but it’s also very rewarding. I wouldn’t pick anything else for the world.” He continued with the same excitement.

“That’s incredible. I wish my job and I had the same relationship honestly.”

“Hey, does your offer still stand?”

“Sorry?” You asked confused, and then realised what he was referring to. “Oh, yeah, of course. Come here.”

You found his shoulder in the dark and raised your hand until you found his nape, guiding his head towards your lap.

“There you go, are you comfortable?”

“Yeah, I am. Sorry about this, I’m just very tired and feel like I might pass out.”

“Don’t worry.”

You placed your other hand on his head and figured out he had a cap on, which you haven’t noticed earlier when you could see him.

“Mind if I take this off?”

“Why?” He asked immediately.

“Just figured I’d massage your scalp to help you sleep better?”

“Oh, no. I haven’t washed my hair.”

“So what?” You chuckled. “You’re such a kid.”

“I’m not a kid! Okay, fine, whatever. Take it off.”

“Good. Now, don’t get worked up and focus on sleeping.” You chuckled again and took off his cap, starting to scratch his head softly, and not even a few minutes later, you heard his steady breathing, signalling that he must’ve fallen asleep.

You wondered how long this power outage was going to last, and time seemed to pass by extremely slowly, and you eventually ended up dozing off as well. The next thing you remember is waking up blinded by the strong white lights inside the elevator, with Chris still sleeping peacefully in your lap.

“Hey.” You nudged him awake, and as he sat up, he looked more confused than ever.

“What’s up? Is the power back on?”

“Apparently.” You smiled softly, yawning.

“Thank you for being my pillow.” He said and stood up, putting his cap back on, then gave you a hand to help you up as well.

“No issues.” You chuckled and accepted his help.

“Need me to drop you off?”

“No, don’t worry about me. I live really close by. Besides, I still need to go back upstairs and grab my phone, so you get going and get some more rest.”

“Alright. Good night, Eun-ji.”

“Night!” You waved as he exited the elevator, unable to believe the interaction you just had, but still way too tired to think too much about it.

---

“That was one of the best sleeps I’ve ever had, believe it or not.”Chris says with a laugh as he recalls the memory.

“Yeah, you mentioned about it a whole lot and always made me scratch your head before sleep whenever you’d come over.” You laughed as well with a shake of your head and watched as he grabbed another card from the deck.

“When was our first kiss?” He asks, and you tilt your head to the side.

“You mean, the date and time?”

“I think it’s more like… if you remember how it happened?” He replies, quite confused as well.

“Ah, I see. Of course I remember.”

“During our first date?”

“No.” You chuckled again. “I told you before that you don’t remember that one time!”

“Ohhhh!” He exclaims. “Yeah, sorry, I think I was drunk out of my mind when that kiss happened.”

“You make it sound like I took advantage of a poor drunk man.” You joke, and Chris laughs as well.

“No, no, nothing like that. But come on, tell the story.”

“Fine.” You playfully roll your eyes.

---

“I can’t believe we’ve been invited to this party!” Your co-worker exclaimed happily as she applied and reapplied her lipstick, making you laugh at her antics.

“Why? It’s literally just a Christmas dinner, babe.”

“No, Eun-ji. It’s not just a dinner, everyone will be there. Everyone.”

“No clue what this means, but whatever.” You chuckled again.

“It means, even the idols! I told you I met Yeji last week and she was such a sweetheart! I wonder if she remembers me!”

“I doubt it, with how much foundation you’ve put on, babe.”

“What, am I not beautiful?” She pouted.

“You are extremely beautiful, but you look very different compared to your day-to-day look. Wait, your lipstick smudged a bit. Here, let me wipe it off.” You grabbed a napkin and carefully worked around your coworker’s lips, making sure the lipstick looked cleanly applied.

“Thank you so much! You’re dressed so plainly, though. You should always dress to impress, Eun-ji! Let’s get you in a dress!” She exclaimed, but you were quick to shake your head.

“No, thank you. I’d much rather feel comfortable. Besides, it’s just a dumb dinner. It’s not like I’ll meet the love of my life or anything like that. I don’t care to impress anyone either.”

“You’re literally impossible. Fine, wear your lame-ass black shirt and jeans, then!” She stuck her tongue out, and you replied in the same manner, before you two ended up making your way towards the elevators.

A few floors up, the elevator stopped, and the doors opened, revealing two men.

One of them, you knew.

“Oh, hello! Eun-ji, right?” Chris spoke, and you smiled slightly.

“Hi.”

“Are you girls going to the last floor too?” He asked, noticing the striking discrepancy between how you and your co-worker were dressed.

“Yeah, we are.” You replied, trying to ignore how hard your co-worker was gripping your arm. You were sure she was freaking out and in dire need of help, since she couldn’t seem to keep her cool in front of these two.

“This is Felix, by the way.” Chris introduced him.

“Hello!” The other man replied in a low tone with a nod and a sweet smile, and you acknowledged him with a short nod.

Of course, you also knew who Felix was, but it was never a big deal to you that they were famous or whatever. They were still people, just like you and your co-worker, who didn’t seem to think the same way, however.

The elevator ride was short, and you got to the last floor in no time, waving goodbye to Felix and Chris and heading towards your assigned table.

“You didn’t tell me you knew freaking Bang Chan!” Your co-worker scream-whispered in your ear, still gripping your arm.

“Because I don’t.” You retorted with a shrug.

“Yeah, you do! He even knew your name! How did that happen?”

“We just happened to meet in an elevator and got stuck for about two hours or so.” You shrugged again.

“What? When?”

“A few months ago, maybe?”

“How could you not tell me? I thought we were friends!”

“Because there was nothing to say!” You replied slightly annoyed, and she rolled her eyes, just as you reached the table.

~

The air was so stuffy in the large room, you could barely breathe. There were too many people – most likely almost everyone in the company, be it idols or mere workers.

It was so hard to hear your thoughts over the loud music, that you decided to simply make a run for it and disappear. It was getting late anyway, and you were tired, and quite honestly sick of the noise.

As you got back to the elevator and reached over to press the button and call it to your floor, your hand collided with someone else’s.

“It appears we meet again.” Chris chuckled.

“Yeah, what’s with us and this damn elevator? I don’t get it.” You laughed as well as you both stepped inside, and you pressed on the ground floor.

Chris also reached out to the buttons and pressed on another floor, but you didn’t pay it any mind.

The doors opened and he got out with a little smile and a “Goodbye!”, but then, just before the doors closed again, he placed his hand in-between them, making them reopen.

“Yes?” You asked in surprise.

“Do you, uhm… do you wanna come see my studio?”

“Why?”

“Might be cool to see.” He shrugged. “I have a bomb song idea and, you know, the creative process and all is quite interesting.”

“The creative process.” You chuckled. “Alright. Why not? As long as it’s quiet.”

“It is, it’s the best room in the building, trust me.” He smiled excitedly and turned around, so you followed him out of the elevator and into the studio.

“It’s so cramped!” You exclaimed the moment you saw it.

“Yeah, but it’s cosy, and it’s mine.” He smiled and offered you a seat on his sofa, which you were quick to accept.

Chris initially sat down at the desk, but after a little while of him pressing buttons and you admiring every corner of the room in silence, he decided to stand back up and come sit on the sofa next to you.

“No more working?”

“No more working.” He shook his head. “I can’t focus.”

“Oh, is it because I’m here?” You replied, slightly embarrassed. Maybe you shouldn’t have come.

“No, of course not! It’s because I’m drunk as fuck and nothing on my screen makes any sense.” He replied quickly with a warm laugh.

“Oh. It’d be best to head home and sleep, then.”

“Eun-ji, I’ll be blunt. Your lips look so incredible right now…”

“Wh- what? My lips?” You immediately put your fingers on top of them. “Must be this new lipbalm I’m using. It’s called-”

“No, it’s not that.” Chris chuckled. “I just wanna…” He grabbed your hand softly and dragged it away, his body coming closer to you, until your lips collided.

For a few seconds, you were taken aback by what was happening, but as the kiss deepened, your hands found the back of his head and you brought him closer.

His tongue was hot on yours, and in no time, you found yourself sitting in his lap, still making out like you were thirsty and his mouth had the only water left on Earth.

One of his hands travelled under your shirt on your naked back, and the other went down to your bum, squeezing it softly, and you let out a moan muffled by his mouth on yours.

---

“Yeah, thinking about it, it was you who initiated that kiss, so you can’t blame me for your drunken mistakes.” You chuckle.

“That was anything but a mistake, Eun-ji.” He replies with a smile that you couldn’t quite read, however, there is a slight longing in his eyes, which makes your heart skip a beat. “And it was quite funny, really. I literally couldn’t remember that we made out, but the next thing I know, I’m looking at my phone and see that we have a date planned in the next few days.”

You chuckle again at the memory, remembering how confused he was when you messaged him to confirm the details about the date.

“Alright, it’s my turn.” You say, deciding to stop pondering on your first moments as a couple and ignore his expression, as you aren’t sure you’d be able to keep a straight face for much longer if he keeps looking at you that way.

He looks at you as if he’s still in love, which makes no sense to you whatsoever. It’s been a year, and even though you are probably still very much in love with him, he is, after all, the one that got away.

You draw a card and read out loud.

“What’s your most treasured memory with us?”

“Oh, tough one.” He replies quickly, his brows furrowing.

“Why? You can’t think of any of them?” You ask, slightly dejected.

“No, it’s not that, Eun-ji. It’s just that… I treasure all of our memories.”

“All of them?” You counter back.

“Yes.”

“Even the fights?”

“Even those.”

As he replies, you don’t know what to say any further. You want to ask some more about it, but before you get the chance to formulate a proper question in your head, he begins talking again.

“If I were to pick only one, however… I think I’d go with that one time you surprised me by coming to our concert in Europe.”

---

“Thank you! You were great tonight, and we can’t wait to come again!” Chris shouted in his microphone before heading off-stage, completely sweaty but still high on the adrenaline from being on stage in front of such a large crowd.

No matter how many times he’s done it, he could never get used to it.

“Good job, boys.” He complimented his team members with a large smile plastered on his face. “Are you ready to party for the rest of the night?”

“Oh, Chris. The manager just informed me that you have to go back to the hotel. There’s apparently something wrong with your room.” Felix frowned slightly as he approached Chris, but was unable to contain his excitement for long, so he made sure to turn around just in time for him not to notice the large smile on his face.

“An issue with my room…?” Chris contemplated with a shake of his head but decided to take the driver anyway and go back to the hotel.

After all, he could always meet up with the boys and the staff later and party, after he fixed whatever was wrong with the room and saw what the emergency was about.

He inquired about the issue at the reception, but they only informed him to head upstairs, and so, he followed suit and went to his room.

As he opened it, however, he noticed that there wasn’t anything wrong. In fact, it was the exact opposite.

There you were, in his room, sitting leisurely on the bed and smiling gleefully at him.

“You’re finally back!” You exclaimed getting off the bed, and Chris just stood silent in the doorway, as if unable to believe his eyes.

“Eun-ji?!” He asked, confusion plastered across his face. “But… how? You told me you couldn’t get off work!”

“Yeah, well, surprise! My co-worker finally agreed to switch shifts with me, so I’ll be here until you leave to the next city!”

“That’s, oh my God, I’m freaking out!” He exclaimed, immediately running towards you and hugging you tightly against his chest, peppering your face with kisses.

“Eww, you’re so sweaty!” You joked and pushed him away.

“Let’s take a shower together! How does that sound?”

“Don’t be lame, Chris. I already filled the tub, let’s have a bubble bath instead!”

“Damn, you’re the freaking best.”

“Damn right.”

You two made your way towards the bathroom, slowly undressing each other in-between kisses, and when you were completely naked, you went into the tub and washed Chan’s back, kissing his neck slowly and hugging him from behind.

“By the way, Chris, you were amazing on stage.”

“Don’t tell me you’ve also seen the concert!” He exclaimed surprised.

“Of course I did! Well, some of it, anyway. But you know what? I’m quite pissed at you. I should be the only one who gets to see these.” As you replied, you moved your hand lower until it reached his abs.

“You’re the only one who gets to touch them, baby.”

“That’s not even true. Your make-up staff touches them all the time.” You pouted, and Chris started laughing at your antics.

Although he couldn’t see you, as you were still hugging him from behind, he knew you well enough to know the face you were making.

“I missed you.” You whispered.

“Me too, baby.” He replied and turned around, making sure to splash a ton of water on the floor in the process, and kissed you again. “Wanna get out so I can show you how much I’ve missed you?”

“Hell yeah.”

---

“That’s a good memory, yeah.” You chuckle, your cheeks growing slightly red remembering the steaming night you two shared, and the morning sex afterwards.

You couldn’t deny that Chris was the best you’ve ever had in every way, and your body already got hot at the thought of him touching you like that.

“So, I guess that makes it my turn.” Chris says with a clear of his throat, and you wonder if he is thinking about the same things as you.

“Go ahead.” You smile and point him towards the cards on his deck.

“Have you slept with anyone else since we’ve broken up?” Chris reads out loud, but before taking his eyes away from the card, he continues by saying: “Wait, you don’t have to respond to this. Can we skip this question?”

He looks at the staff members and places the card down, but you don’t have anything to hide. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway if you slept or didn’t sleep with anyone else. It’s not like it’s any of his business to care and get affected by your reply.

“I didn’t.” You say quietly and reach towards a new card but decide to ask as well. “Have you?”

“Eun-ji…” He frowns.

“Sorry for asking.” You shrug and then turn your card up. “The next questions reads-”

“I haven’t.” He cuts you off and averts his gaze, moment when you look at him confused.

“What?”

“I haven’t… slept with anyone else.” Chris confesses, leaving you utterly speechless.

“Oh. Alright… uhm… the next question says… what was the worst part about our relationship?” You tuck your hair behind your ear, a habit you have whenever you get nervous.

“Oh, that’s an easy one.” He chuckles. “It was definitely me.”

“What?” You frown. “Chris, you know that’s not true.”

“But it is… the fact that I was never there when you needed me…”

---

“So, I went shopping today. What are you wearing on Saturday? If you wear a tie, we need to get one in the same colour as my dress.” You spoke in a breath, kissing Chan's cheek.

“Saturday? What’s on Saturday?” He asked, genuinely confused.

“What?” You chuckled in disbelief. “My childhood friend invited us to her wedding, remember?”

“Oh, right!” He exclaimed. “Wait, let me check the date real quick.”

He stood up from the bed and ran to the living room, picking up his phone and opening his calendar.

“Shit. Babe…?” He smiled sheepishly.

“Don’t tell me you have other plans.” You frowned.

“I talked to our producer, and we are supposed to record some parts from that new song I told you about on Saturday… but it’s okay! I’ll make sure to finish in time so we can still go to the wedding! Don’t worry!” He immediately responded and apologised.

“Chris, the wedding is 3 hours away by car. I promised her we’d be there at 2 for the ceremony as well, not just for the party afterwards.” Your frown only deepened.

“Do we really need to go to the ceremony, though? Aren’t they… I don’t know… boring?”

“Are you being serious right now?” You sat up, annoyance plastered in your tone. “Chris, she’s my best friend. Of course we have to go to the ceremony too!”

“Eun-ji…” He started, and you got even more annoyed. It was like he wouldn’t take accountability for anything.

“I told you six months ago, Chris. How much time ahead do I have to tell you to make sure you’d clear up your schedule?”

“I’m so sorry, baby, but you know that our release schedule is really tight…”

“Why can’t I be a priority at least once, hm?! At least for a weekend!” You felt your eyes watering up. You knew his job was the most important, however, you were getting tired of always being put in second place by your boyfriend.

Hell, you were so disappointed right now. You asked him to clear up one single weekend, and he couldn’t even remember to do that.

“You know what? You’re right. I’m going to call up the producer right now and reschedule for next week, okay?” He pleaded with you, but you were already beyond disappointed with this situation.

He’s already made sure not to prioritize you, so you decided to just stop bothering him about it altogether.

“You know what? Don’t worry about it. I’ll just go on my own.”

“Eun-ji-”

“Besides, you don’t know anyone there, anyway, whereas I’ll just catch up with all my friends from school, so don’t worry. Go record your song.”

You got out of bed and made your way to the bathroom, turning on the water and hopping into the shower, trying to wash all the tears away.

---

“That was certainly… one of the lowest points in our relationship.” You reply, remembering the event with bitterness.

You ended up going alone to the wedding, and despite having fun and catching up with your old friends, having to go there on your own and having people ask you about where your boyfriend was truly hurt you.

“Mhm… I agree. I was such a dick. I’m so sorry, Eun-ji. If I were to turn back time, I would’ve never done those stupid mistakes.” He smiles apologetically.

“It’s fine… it’s all in the past anyway.” You return the same pained expression as he draws another card from the pile.

“Why did you accept to come here today?”

“Is that the question?”

“Yeah.”

“Hmm, I guess I was just… I don’t know, even though we’ve broken up on relatively good terms, if you could say that... I guess I just wanted to talk to you again?” You smile briefly and draw another card. “Do you think I was a jealous partner?”

“You?” Chris chuckles. “God, no. If anything, I was the jealous one.”

“You were?” You laugh as well.

“Yeah… You, however, were never jealous, no matter how many people I’d interact with. Even though it was never inappropriate, I really appreciated that you trusted me, no matter what.”

“Of course I trusted you.” You smile. “You never made me doubt you, not even once.”

Which was true. You knew that he truly loved you during the brief two years of your relationship, and he’s never put himself in any compromising position with anyone else to make you jealous.

“Anyway… the next card reads: Why didn’t we work out?” You read out loud and wait a few seconds for Chris’ reply.

“I think the first time I started to doubt if our relationship was fair to you was when you got fired from the company because… because you were dating me. That’s when I knew that something was fundamentally wrong with us being together, because instead of me giving you anything positive, I just ended up causing you pain.” Chris speaks slowly, letting out a long exhale at the end.

“It was… a really tough time for me. Although my job was not ideal, it was something I worked very hard for, and once our relationship became public and suddenly everyone knew about us…” You shake your head.

It was a very difficult time for you to put yourself out there and find another job when the whole country was aware of your relationship with Chris.

“However… no matter how hard it was, I could get through it only because you were there with me.” You frowned. “I never blamed you for my job, or anything like that… ever.”

“I know… But still, how could I not blame myself? I felt so guilty… Heck, even now, a year after we broke up, I’m still sending you money to help you out with rent, even though I know you have a new job and all.” He chuckles.

“And I always send it back.” You smile.

“Wait, you do?” He frowns. “Really?”

“Mhm.” You nod, and he pulls out his phone and opens his bank app, and his expression only becomes more downcast.

“Eun-ji, why?”

“It’s alright, Chris. I really don’t need it. You’d better spend it for something else.”

“But I-”

“Really, stop it. Read the next card.” You blow him off, dismissing his words, and he lets out a sigh.

“What was our worst fight?”

“Hmm… I think the most soul crushing one was when I got that new job…”

“Right, I was also thinking of that one. See? I told you I was the more jealous one in our relationship.” Chris chuckles with a shake of his head.

---

“Thank you for dropping me off.” You smiled sweetly at one of your new co-workers, who offered you a ride home in his car since you were on his way.

Ever since you got fired from JYPE, you were struggling to find a new job, but thankfully, an opportunity came your way, and you didn’t think twice to accept it.

However, the new job was quite far away, and the hours were longer. You missed your short commute home, but you were simply unable to find anything else in the area.

You got out of his car and waved him goodbye, and when you turned around, there was Chris, with an angry expression on his face.

“Who was that?” He asked immediately.

“Is this how we say hi to each other now?” You tilted your head, unable to understand why he seemed so pissed at you.

“Eun-ji, answer the question, please. Who the hell was that, and why is he dropping you off so late? Where were you?”

“At work. I started a new job, remember?” You frowned, not understand what he was trying to accuse you of, or why.

“It’s almost 9 PM, and I see a random man dropping you off home. Do you think I’m stupid or something?” He fired back, angrier than before.

“Excuse me? What are you insinuating?” You retorted.

“I’m not insinuating anything. I’m just asking you a damn question, Eun-ji.”

“And I’m answering!” You almost started shouting but decided to take a deep breath in and ask Chris to talk inside.

He followed you upstairs, but his demeanour was cold, which gave away the fact that the fight was far from over.

“Alright, we’re inside. Care to explain now?”

“There’s nothing to explain, Chris. That was just my co-worker.”

“Just your co-worker. Okay, sure. And why the hell was he giving you a ride home?” He continued to ask in an accusatory tone, which pissed you off to no end.

“I don’t know, Chris. Maybe it’s because my boyfriend is way too busy to make the time to come pick me up or at least send me a damn cab!”

You found it hard to keep your composure any longer, so the way you replied came out a bit too loud, and so began a screaming match between you two, and by far the worst fight you’ve ever had, which ended in Chris leaving your apartment and you crying your eyes out until 5AM.

---

“I am not proud at all of how I acted that night…” Chris closes his eyes and breaths in, and you can almost hear the pain in his voice.

“I can’t say I handled it too well either.” You sigh. “I mean, I always gave you my unconditional trust, and there you were, doubting me because I decided to accept a ride from my co-worker. It was really shitty of you to do that…”

“I know… I’m sorry.” He apologises, and you draw a new card.

“Who broke up with who?”

“It was me... I knew how much I was hurting you, and I just… I guess I decided that breaking up would be better for the both of us.”

---

“Are you mad at me again?” You frowned, hearing the 10th sigh getting out of Chan’s lips in the past 5 minutes.

“No, I’m not mad at you.”

“That’s what it looks like.”

“I’m just so incredibly stressed, Eun-ji. Can’t you understand that?”

“No, Chris, I’m just a child, I need you to spell it out for me.”

“Now you’re just mocking me again.”

“What the hell is wrong with you? It’s like the only thing we do lately is fight.”

“You’re right.” He let out another sigh. “I wish we wouldn’t fight anymore.”

He stood up and cupped your cheeks, pressing a firm kiss against your lips.

“Me neither. I love you, Chris. I really do.”

“I love you too, Eun-ji.”

You continued kissing slowly, your hands exploring the other’s body, and your clothes started disappearing one by one, your naked bodies collapsing on the bed on top of one another.

You made love and kissed each other again and again, until there was no space on your bodies that the other’s lips haven’t touched.

Then, you laid your head on Chan’s shoulder and closed your eyes, almost falling asleep before the sounds of a whimper stirred you awake.

“Hey, you okay?” You asked, concern plastered across your face.

“Eun-ji… I’m so sorry baby.”

“What for?” You frowned.

“I think…” Chris started, his voice immediately cut off by a cry as he separated himself from you and sat up on the bed, not even looking at you.

“What’s wrong?” You sat up as well and placed your hand on his naked back, caressing it softly.

“I think we should break up, Eun-ji.”

As he said this, it felt like your whole world collapsed around you. His words took your breath away, and as he stood up and got dressed, you began shaking your head repeatedly and trying to talk some sense into him.

“Chris… no. No, no, we can’t. What do you mean, break up? No…” You stood up and followed him out of the room and into the hallway, watching helplessly as he began putting on his shoes.

“I’m so, so sorry. But it’d be better for us to break up. All we do is fight, and I… I ruined everything…” Chris cried, and so did you, as you hanged onto him for dear life, hugging his back and trying to stop him for going through that door.

“Please, no. Please stay.” You begged. “We don’t have to break up. We can make it work, hm?”

“No… No, we can’t. We’ve been trying for so long, and yet… I put you through so much… you’d definitely be better off without me, Eun-ji.”

“You’re so fucking selfish!” You shouted, crying your heart out. “I love you so much, and yet…”

“I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you, Eun-ji. But…” As he said this, he chocked on a sob, coughing slightly and wiping his tears away rapidly. “I just think it’d be best to stop this before I end up hurting you more, hm?”

"I'm the one who should decide if you're hurting me, Chris, not you!" You countered back, but he wouldn't hear any of it.

He turned around and hugged you tight, and the only thing you could do was beg him not to go.

He didn’t listen to you, and he left, and the house felt unbearably cold, and your bed was so empty, you loathed looking at it, knowing that just hours prior, you’ve made love on top of those sheets, and he loved you, and you loved him.

You tried calling him numerous times for the next week, but his calls would instantly get redirected to voice mail. At first, you left messaged for him, raging from disappointed, to sad, and even angry as the days passed and he wouldn’t return any of your calls, and after two weeks of no news from him, you understood that his decision was final, so you decided to finally block his number, and you haven’t looked back since.

---

“You were so incredibly cruel about that.” You reply, feeling tears well up in your eyes. However, you swallowed back the lump in your throat and didn’t allow yourself to cry in front of him again.

“I don’t know what I was thinking… To be honest, I’ve been considering breaking up for a while, but… the way I did it was indeed way too cruel, and that’s something I still regret. I just ended up hurting both of us in the process…”

You let out a bitter smile at his confession. You wanted to tell him how much it still hurt, how the break-up was still fresh in your mind even a year later, and how much you wish it never happened, but you couldn’t say anything.

You point him towards the cards, and he draws one and reads:

“Who do you think had the harder time after we broke up?”

“Honestly?” You chuckle. “I’ll selfishly say it was me. Did you have a hard time at all?”

“God, you have no idea.” He chuckles as well.

“Really?” Your eyes grow large. “But you didn’t even return my calls.”

“And when I did, I found out you blocked my number, so…” He scratches his nape.

“Oh.”

“Yeah…”

You don’t know how to react to this new information. You’ve been wondering all this time if he’s ever reached out, and now that you found he did, you heart broke.

Maybe coming to this show was really a mistake, because your heart doesn’t seem to heal at all – it’s quite the opposite. It’s weighing heavier in your chest, and it hurts so much, and it doesn't seem like you'll get any closure.

You draw another card, but the question gets cold on your tongue, and you barely find the strength to ask it.

“Did you… uhm… did you ever see yourself marrying me?” You clear your throat and look at Chris, who’s showing you the most compassionate expression, so full of love, like you haven’t broken up a year ago.

“Yes.” He replies plainly, and this finally breaks you.

You avert your gaze as you feel your eyes swelling up with tears.

“I’m sorry, can I please have a moment? I need a break.”

You take in a few deep breaths and refuse to look at Chris anymore, because you can’t help the growing feelings in your chest and the pain ever-present in your heart.

“Alright… when?” You ask after a little while, trying to wipe away any tears that might’ve fallen on your cheeks.

“I fell in love with you quickly, but… I think I knew for sure that I wanted us to… uhm… to be more than just a couple… when you first met my family.”

---

“I’m so anxious! What if they won’t like me? What if they’d think I’m not good enough for you? Oh my God, Chris, where are the presents I bought??? Did you forget to pack them? I explicitly said-”

“God, Eun-ji, calm down.” Chris chuckled. “It’s just my parents. And I put the presents right there in the bag, just as you’ve asked me to.”

“I’m so anxious, I can’t help it!” You pouted. “Where exactly?”

“Here, let me look for them.” He offered, and you plopped on the bed in Chan’s old room, almost on the verge of crying.

You were thankful that his parents were away for a few hours to some sort of event, which gave you a little time to settle in their house and mentally prepare yourself for the impending meeting.

“What?” Chris asked puzzled.

“What?” You immediately sat back up, watching as Chris looked confused.

“I’m sure I packed them. Is this the wrong bag?” He tilted his head to the right, and you just about died.

“This can’t be true!” You exclaimed as Chris closed the bag and examined it.

“Shit, I thought you said I should put them in the blue one.”

“Chris!” You grabbed a pillow and threw it at him, and he started chuckling.

“It’ll be okay, babe, don’t worry.”

“No, it won’t! I came empty handed and they’re going to hate me, and-” You sniffed and buried your face in your palms, but Chris grabbed them gently and pushed them away, grabbing your face with his hands.

“They won’t hate you. They will see how much I love you, and they will love you too.”

“I put so much thought into those presents, though.” You pouted, thinking of the matching jewellery set you got for Chan’s folks that took you ages to decide on.

Before Chris got the chance to say anything else, you heard the front door open, and your heart stood still in your chest.

“Looks like they’re here. Come on, let’s meet them.” He dragged you up from the bed and you reluctantly followed him, and there they were, in the doorway, with large smiles on their faces at the sight of their son.

Chris introduced you and they immediately made you feel welcomed by taking you into a large hug, and then you had lunch together, when you talked and told them lots of funny stories from work and from your childhood.

Chan’s mother was more than happy to hear these stories and shared some of her son’s growing up as well, with a large smile spread across her face, and you had such a pleasant time together, hours ended up passing by, and day turned to night in no time.

By the time you were back in bed next to Chris, you wondered why you worried in the first place. These people were as lovely as him, and they apparently adored you too.

---

“My mom still asks me about you.” Chris chuckles.

“I also think about them often. How are they doing?” You ask with a soft smile, remembering the good times.

There were a lot of downs in your relationship, but more than anything – bigger than the pointless fights and sleepless nights –, you had some amazing moments together that you’d do anything to relive.

It truly doesn’t feel like a whole year went by with Chris not being in your life.

“They are doing well. Like usual.” He smiles back. “I believe we have two more questions to ask.”

“Yeah, it appears so.” You reply, unable to believe that a whole hour has passed already.

“My question reads: what have you been up to ever since we’ve broken up?”

“Hmm… you know me, just hustling here and there. I’ve found a new job that’s closer to home, I started going to the gym more or less regularly, I made some new friends and tried out some hobbies – which I ended up being too bad at to pursue.” You chuckle.

“Really? Like what?” Chan’s eyes sparkle with excitement as he’s placing his elbows on the table and his head steadily on his palms, showing you that you have his undivided attention, and it feels like no time has passed at all.

If you weren’t totally sure of your feelings until now, if you had the smallest doubt in your mind that you still loved him, watching him look at you like this made it clear.

You are very much still in love with Chris, and despite everything that went down, you wish things would be different between you.

You dread the hour being over and going back home to your life, devoid of his presence.

“Uhm, don’t laugh at me please.” You start, and Chris already lets out a chuckle. “I tried dancing, painting, boxing-”

“Wait, dancing?” Chris immediately erupts into laughter. “Eun-ji, you can’t be serious!”

“And why not?” You frown jokingly.

“I mean, you were always so bad at it whenever I’d try to show you any moves!” He continues laughing.

“Well, that’s your own fault for having hard ass choreos, not mine!” You retort, laughing along. “Besides, you promised me you wouldn’t laugh!”

“I didn’t promise anything!” He raises his hands in front of him in fake defence, a large smile adorning his face.

“Oh, fuck off!” You exclaim with a chuckle, drawing the last card from your pile. “Why did you invite me here today?”

“Oh.” Chris immediately turns serious and scratches his nape in slight embarrassment. “Uhm, you might know that I have a new album coming out… a solo one?”

“Yeah, I’ve heard something about it.” You nod.

So, after all, you were right, and he only invited you here to promote it.

“I don’t know what that has to do with me, though.” You continue, feeling your heart grow heavy.

“The album is about you, that’s why.” He smiles softly. “Would you maybe like to… listen to one of the songs in it?”

“Sure.” You nod again, your heart beating harder.

“It’s called Eun-ji.”

As he says this, he pulls out his phone and presses play on the song, and the calm beats begin surrounding you two, and soon enough, Chan’s pained voice.

It’s a sad song about a missed love, about regret and pain, about every unspoken feeling Chris had ever since you’ve broken up, and you found yourself tearing up and needing a few napkins to go through the whole thing.

Chris also begins crying, wiping his tears away repeatedly until the song is over, and when it is, he clears his throat and places his phone back in his pocket.

“Eun-ji, I… I’m still in love with you. Do you think that maybe... you would ever see us getting back together? Do you think you could ever give me another chance to fix my mistakes, to fix us?”

As he confesses this, you cry even louder and decide against replying. Instead, you stand up and go directly towards him, plopping yourself in his lap and hugging him tightly, and he immediately welcomes you, his arms circling your frame and pulling you tighter against him.

“I love you too, so, so much, Chris.” You whisper as you draw back, and his hands find your cheeks as he wipes away all the tears that are falling.

“My love, I was so, so wrong and selfish.” He frowns.

You shake your head, not wanting to think about it anymore, and press your lips against his.

Your first kiss after a whole year apart is long and sweet, and he hugs you even closer, and oh, how much you’ve missed him and everything about him. How much you longed to have him again…

“I missed you so much.” You confess, and he buries his head against your chest and sobs quietly in your arms for a few moments.

“Do you… uhm… do you want to get out of here and have some lunch? And maybe dinner, too?” He asks looking right in your eyes, and you nod, so he helps you up and grabs your hand, and without a word more, you two exit the studio together with the silent understanding that you’re back together, willing to work on your mistakes and to make it work this time around.

~The End~

[glorious-spoon]

hiiii 🥰 buddie and 🤍? - @team-118 <3

hiiii @team-118 and sorry this took FOREVER to get to, lol. have a bit of Buck and Eddie, just before their wedding.

🤍 kiss at the wedding / milestone

The closet door clicks open, and Eddie takes a deep breath and tries to compose himself so that he looks like he was doing something productive, like looking for the missing place cards or maybe the wet vac to deal with the flower vase that tipped over in the entry hall, which probably isn't his job in any case right now, but—just. Something.

"Eddie?" Buck asks, because of course it's Buck. Of course it is. Normally, Buck would be the person he'd like to see most, in pretty much any situation, but not right now. Hen, that'd be okay. Chim. Bobby. Even Maddie—Eddie's got an idea that she might know a little something about the kind of panicky jitters he's experiencing right now.

Not Buck. Not Buck, who's worked so hard to make everything perfect for today, who still sometimes looks at Eddie with big wondering eyes like he thinks this is all going to disappear. Who'll almost definitely think the worst if he catches Eddie hyperventilating in a coat closet twenty minutes before their wedding is supposed to start.

"Yeah," he says anyway, because the closet isn't that deep and he's got maybe five seconds before Buck turns the light on and sees him anyway. "I was looking for… uh. Something."

"Uh huh," Buck says. He steps into the closet, pulling the door shut behind him, enclosing them in darkness. 

"We're not supposed to see each other before the ceremony starts," Eddie points out, but the darkness makes him feel a little better.

"I can't see anything," Buck says. Eddie can hear the smile in his voice, and it makes him smile automatically too, just like it always does. Buck bumps something, stumbles, swears under his breath. "Okay, but seriously, I can't see anything. Where are you?"

Eddie laughs shakily under his breath and reaches out, grasping in the darkness until his hand catches at one of Buck's elbows. "Right here."

"Oh! Hi." Buck shifts into his space, stumbles again, then finds a seat on the overturned crate against the back wall next to Eddie. He smells like fruit-flavored gum and his good cologne, and his body is warm through the faintly rough fabric of his tux. He leans into Eddie's side a little, and Eddie leans back. "So, am I allowed to ask what you're doing back here?"

Eddie groans. "If I told you I was looking for the place cards, would you believe me?"

"No," Buck says, still smiling a little by the sound. His hand finds Eddie's knee, squeezes. "But we can go with that if you want."

"I might be freaking out a little bit," Eddie admits.

"Yeah, I, uh, I kinda guessed that, Eddie."

"It's not because I'm having second thoughts," Eddie says, because that much, at least, he needs Buck to know. "I want to marry you. I can't wait to marry you."

Buck makes a little noise, soft and pleased. His cheek presses against Eddie's for a moment, and Eddie feels his body move as he takes a breath. "But?"

"But I'm afraid I'm going to fuck it up. I don't have a great track record. Or—I don't know. I walked into the garden earlier and it was…"

Beautiful, it was beautiful, the flower-decked arch and the rows of chairs and the sign with both their names on it entwined, it was beautiful, and it was perfect, and it's what Eddie wants more than anything, so it makes no sense that his throat closed up and he scurried away to hide here before anyone could come up and congratulate him.

"I called Maddie last night to freak out on her about how we should just call it all off and stay common law married forever," Buck offers, after Eddie has been silent for a moment.

Eddie laughs, startled. "You did not."

"Oh, I so did."

"Do you want to call it all off?"

"No," Buck says. He's still smiling a little, Eddie can tell. "I'm just scared I'm going to fuck it up."

Abruptly, Eddie starts laughing. He curls in on himself, heaving with it, and feels Buck shake with laughter too. In the darkness, Buck reaches for his hand; in the darkness, Eddie leans into him and feels the tension drain away.

"We could always elope," he offers, after it's finally passed.

"Yeah."

"Your parents would kill you. After what happened with Maddie and Chim's wedding? They'd kill you."

"I don't give a shit about them," Buck says. He presses his mouth to Eddie's hairline. "I'd elope with you. I'd skip our wedding to hide out in a closet with you."

"I love you," Eddie says, and it's at least the thousandth time he's said those words to Buck, but they still feel like an incredible relief; like saying them has finally given him the space he needs to breathe. "I really, really love you. You know that, right?"

"Yeah," Buck says. He kisses Eddie's forehead again. "I love you too."

"I'm being an idiot."

"Nah." Buck pauses. "Well, maybe a little. But it's okay."

"Thanks," Eddie says. He leans a little more into Buck with a deep sigh, the last of the tension easing from his shoulders. "We should probably get back out there before somebody comes looking for us."

"They can wait," Buck says. "It's not like they can start the wedding without us. We can stay here as long as you want."

"They're definitely going to think that we're having a quickie in here."

"Well…" Buck says thoughtfully. Eddie digs his fingers into his ribs, and he squirms, laughing. "Okay, okay!"

"We can save that for the reception," Eddie says, and Buck laughs harder. "Come on. Let's go."

"Okay." Buck shifts against him, straightening up. "Just one thing first."

Eddie opens his mouth to ask, but then Buck's fingers are on his jaw, a careful guide in the darkness as he leans in and kisses the question off of Eddie's lips. It lingers sweetly for a moment, and they part softly.

"Okay," Eddie says, just as soft, and kisses him again before pulling back. "Okay. Let's go get married."

[bwabys-scenarios]

After months of Killua making fun of Kurapika for crushing on you, he accidentally calls you “mom” in front of the group. Finally, Kurapika has SOME sort of ammo against him. It doesn’t seem to work for long though, because you laugh it off, honored that he sees you as a mother figure. And honestly, it makes Killua feel a lot better about going back to picking on Kurapika, especially after Gon accidentally calls you mom too.

“Hahah you like (name)”

“Oh, you mean your mom?”

“Nice try, that’s not gonna work anymore. Gon called her mom by accident yesterday, so it’s not THAT out of place. Plus she was happy about it.”

“You got over that quickly.”

“Yeah, too bad you can’t get over your crush as quickly as I got over the mom embarrassment”

When the group meets up to do anything fun, you’re the one that organizes it. Whether that be for a movie, a trip to the zoo, or even a vacation to the beach, you’re sending them all a list of what they need to pack and how much money they’ll need to bring to cover their tickets and food.

At least, you do that for the adults. For the kids, they stay with you so often that you have two suitcases full of their clothes and a list of the products they use.

Killua can’t stand mint tooth paste, so you buy him the bubblegum flavored kind instead. Gon is picky about what shampoo he uses, so you make sure that you get the scentless kind.

When you arrive at the beach with the boys in tow, you already LOOK like a mom. You’re carrying an umbrella and big bag full of towels and are yelling at them to put on sunscreen. Especially Killua, with his pasty ass.

He tries to run away from you, but Gon helps you catch him.

He grumbles as you cover him in sunscreen, calling Gon a traitor. As you do this, Kurapika and Leorio show up, carrying the ice chest full of drinks and fruit you’d packed before you left.

“Hello (Name). I see you’ve managed to catch Killua.”

You giggle. “With Gon’s help.”

Killua turns back, his eyes narrowing.

“Mom, don’t tell h-“

He pauses.

They all pause, everyone except you.

“Hmm? Don’t tell him what?”

Killua literally looks like a fish gasping for air, his face red and barely able to breathe.

“I-you-“

He runs off, dragging Gon behind him as they rush into the water. You can see Gon ask Killua something, the latter responding by throwing him into the depths.

Kurapika lets out a snicker, storing this information for later. “So you’re mom now?”

You shrug, standing up and pulling your dress off to reveal a two piece. His teasing is quieted when you drop your dress onto the ground and stretch.

“I’ve been called mom before, by a lot of people. It’s really not a big deal.”

You hand Kurapika the bottle of sunscreen. “You two make sure you put some on, alright sweetheart?”

You took off for the water. “I’m coming, boys, make some room!”

Kurapika could understand why he called you mom, but that doesn’t mean he would let Killua slide that easily.

As you and Leorio play 1v1 volleyball on the beach, Kurapika and Killua sit next to each other.

Killua KNOWS what Kurapika is going to say. He already knows, yet he can’t get up until you come back and reapply his sunscreen.

“I didn’t know you were a mamas boy, Killua.”

The white haired boy shoots him a glare, his cheeks pink. “Shut up.”

“Why? Am I not stating a fact?”

Killua huffs. He watches as Gon joins your team, saying Leorio was being to hard on you. He wants to join, anything to get away from Kurapika’s smug smirk.

“Missing your mom right now?”

Killua throws sand into his face. This results in the two fighting, getting your dress and towels covered in sand.

When you finish your game, you come back to see the two glaring at each other, wet sand clinging to them as they attempted to clean off the towel.

“I KNOW you two didn’t get sand on my dress.”

You stand before them, your arms crossed over your chest. Right now, you’re giving them the angry mom look, and even Kurapika feels a little scared.

“He started it mom! I didn’t e-“

Killua groaned loudly and slapped a hand over his face. He said it AGAIN.

“I’m sorry I-“

You sigh and pat his head. “Don’t be sorry, I don’t mind you calling me mom. I’m honored even.”

You smile at him and brush the sand off of your stuff.

“Let’s eat, you’re both probably just hangry!”

———————

“Hi mom!”

Gon waves at you from across the store, not even realizing what he’d called you. Killua startles next to him, grabbing his shoulder.

“Gon, you just called her mom.”

Gon slaps a hand over his mouth. “Oh.”

“I told you I don’t mind.”

You appear in front of them, the boys instantly taking the shopping bags out of your hands. “Aww, my sweet boys. I can carry them myself, you know.”

Gon shakes his head. “Aunt Mito said men shouldn’t let a lady carry stuff all by herself!”

“… they’re too heavy for you.”

You laugh and ruffle their hair. “Alright, alright. Let’s go home.”

Killua follows behind you. Home. Your house was home to him, more than the place he’d been born and raised was. You never placed expectations on him, you allowed him to be the kid he was. Although it was a bit annoying when you were too overprotective, he knew it came from a place of care, and he was okay with being babied if it was you.

You really were his mom, weren’t you?

“(Name)?”

You hum in response, peeking at Killua.

“Is… is it really okay if I… call you mom?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be? You’re both basically my kids already. Especially with how much you make me worry.”

You rub your face. “Look, I’m getting wrinkles.”

The two laugh, catching up to walk on each side of you.

“Alright, alright. Sorry… mom.”

You smile and ruffle his hair. “It’s okay.”

—————

You get home and ask for them to get the groceries put up while you go to shower.

Kurapika gets home shortly after, shrugging off his coat and placing it on the coat hanger.

He looks into the kitchen to see Gon and Killua sorting through the groceries, the two sneaking a few pieces of the candy you’d bought as they did.

“Your girlfriend is in the shower.”

Kurapika takes a second to process what Killua said before snapping back. “You mean your mom?”

“Kurapika, you sh-“ Gon is interrupted by Killua crossing his arms and blowing a raspberry at Kurapika.

“She said I can call her mom if I want. But you can’t call her your girlfriend, can you?”

The two stare at him in shock. Kurapika can’t speak, his eyes and face turning red.

“You little-“

You step out of the bathroom in one of Kurapika’s shirts and a pair of shorts. “Oh, Kurapika, you’re home!”

You run up to him and give him a big hug, placing a kiss on his cheek. “Did your mission go well?”

Kurapika was already reeling from Killua’s words, and now he was the brightest shade of red he’d ever been. Did you just… kiss his cheek? His cheek? HIS? And you’re… wearing his shirt. Oh god.

“I-um it’s-“

Killua snickers from his seat on the counter. “Who’s the mamas boy now?”

The two start fighting, you confused.

“What does he mean by that?”

Gon shrugs. “Dunno. You should probably just let them fight it out though.”

You pout, but he’s probably right. If you stepped in, they’d just be passively aggressive to each other all night, and you didn’t want that.

“If you two are going to fight at least do it outside, I have breakable knickknacks.”

[beelinx]

hi!! could you do leo dating an ares kid? 🫶🏻

leo valdez dating a child of ares hcs

a/n: i hope this is okay anon 😖 i actually had lots of fun with this it’s a rlly cute dynamic

First impression: Scared.

Honestly it’s not his fault, you and your siblings are usually so intimidating.

Even more so when a capture the flag game is going on.

You guys were on opposite teams, and happened to bump into each other at one point during the game.

You almost ripped his throat out and he almost burned your hair.

Love at first sight <3

Well, it might not have been the best first impression, but it somehow still wasn’t long before he fell for you.

He started seeing you around camp more and more, and after a while you even started to have casual conversations, too.

He got more comfortable with you as time went on, and started to see a side of you he really liked !

He noticed you were actually kind, you cared a lot about people around you, and you were actually really funny.

Also you’re smoking hot.

Win win!

Once you’re actually dating you would be an insane power couple.

With Leo’s smarts and fire power, and your insane battle, and multiple other, skills, you two could easily defeat *almost* anyone.

But going back to Ares kids being scary: He basically shits his pants when he first meets your siblings.

Well, he actually already knew most of them beforehand – he’d seen some of them around camp, and he has even made weapons for some of them.

Still though, they had zero mercy telling him exactly what they’d do to him if he dared to treat you badly.

Okay well now he’s scared again.

Whoever you don’t like, he doesn’t like either.

Do you hate that girl from the Demeter cabin? He hates her too.

That Hermes boy keeps bothering you? Yeah, he sucks and should drop dead immediately.

Okay, he might think you get a little bit too carried away with the death wishes, but he supports you and all your… strong feelings.

Also – if you have a rough relationship with your father, you best bet he now has beef with him, too.

Silently, though. He’s much too terrified of Ares to trash talk him publicly.

Leo easily thinks you’re just about one of the coolest people ever.

He swears up and down that whenever he sees you fight, he falls in love all over again.

You leave him awestruck tbh.

If you have a short temper, he would try his best to be patient with you, even if it’s sometimes hard for him, too.

He knows you can’t control it that well, therefore he tries to help you out a lot.

By treating you kindly, listening to you patiently, and also not pissing you off.

You obviously try your best for him, too.

In the end, you’re both really sweet and considerate to each other <3

He’d make anything you ask for !!

If you ever want any weapon of sorts then trust he has it covered, and then some.

He’d add little quirks that make them cooler, like rigging them with special effects.

Ask him for anything else, be it a random cup of coffee or a full-blown spaceship, and he’d try his best to do it for you.

Making you happy is what he loves most so he’d move whatever you want to the top of his priority list.

Seeing your happy face makes it all worth it <3

Of course, though, you smack his head when you realize he lost sleep just to complete this project for you.

Okay, well, he may not be able to work in his workshop at night without you watching over him like a hawk anymore, but you still squeezed hugged and kissed him when he first showed the final product to you, so…

He’s taking it as a win!

Also because he now has you spending even more time with him, and in his favorite place, too.

He really can’t stop winning, huh?

[charliedawn]

Cam you write the slashers helping you feel better on your period? I just got mine recently and it's more painful than usual

(Warning: Hum…There’s gonna be suggestive stuff. But I’ll draw a line so you’ll know where to stop.)

The helpful ones: Michael Myers/Norman Bates

Michael wouldn’t necessarily know what to do at first. But once you give him a list, he will be the first out of the door to give you everything you want and need. He would simply grab the best of everything and hope it will be enough. Also, he would buy you a lot of snacks. And the man is built like a bull so he would carry everything without breaking a sweat and cuddle with you until you feel better—no questions asked.

Norman would not even need a list. He would rush to the nearest pharmacy to buy the medicine you need to feel better. He would also already have all the supplies you need in his motel, in some special drawer. But he wouldn’t even hesitate if you needed some specific type of comfort food before jumping into his car and getting it right away. He would also cuddle with you and kiss your forehead…

The ‘help is on the way’ ones: Jason Voorhees/Brahms Heelshire

Jason would be dumbfounded. What is a period ? But he would hug you nonetheless and tell you that everything would be alright. He would also share his secret stash of ice cream with you and warn someone in the hospital so they may give him or tell him what you need to feel better. He would not know how to find everything on his own…

Brahms would be more aware of what it is since he used to watch his babysitters VERY closely. *cough cough* So he would bring you the products they used and lots of candy and chocolates…but he wouldn’t go out to buy you anything because he would be too scared of leaving you alone. So…someone else has to do that.

The ‘am gonna do something about it but because I gotta not because I wanna’: Dennis/Five

Dennis would be scared of the stains you would leave behind if he left you to fend for yourself. So he would go, take the products that Patricia tells him to buy and come home before throwing them into your room and locking the door behind him…He would also take regular showers and disinfect your room as often as possible. Also if he is feeling generous, might throw you snacks once in a while…

Five would just stare at you with that ‘are you kidding me?’ expression and just ask you why you didn’t think about buying all that before the red deadline. He would then mumble and grumble before taking your list and teleporting to begrudgingly buy them all in a hurry. He would then throw the money on the counter to return as quickly as possible and forget all about tampons or pads or whatever other stuff women need those days…

Here is the line:

———————————————————————

Pussy-Cleaning at your Service: Freddy/Bo Sinclair

Those two would take offense if you didn’t warn them. Actually, they would have that special week circled in red in their calendar with little hearts. Those two ? Down and dirty. What do you mean you wanna be left alone ? Their snouts are already seeking like a bloodhound’s. What do you mean it’s disgusting ?! Now don’t be silly and let that magic tongue do what it does best…They are already nose-deep before you even got the chance to say a word…All I can say is brace yourself and have a happy landing.

Bye-Bye team: Penny Team

…Blood ? What blood ? Nope. No blood. Because those two would devour you. And not in the good way I am afraid…In the sharks in water kinda way. In the ‘you gonna take a long nap’ kinda way. In the ‘you gonna float’ kinda way. All nurses in St Louis are forbidden to work during their red days for that very reason.

[its-weeping]

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐄𝐑 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒. ࿔

genre. fluff!! akaashi loves u too much it's terrifying ⭑.ᐟ

notes. js some drabble bc he's so relatable and i'm also an overthinker, my pretty man <33

people can get frantic when they're stuck around their own thoughts, thinking and thinking and just thinking about the littlest things that don't have to matter.

akaashi is the same. he knows that.

he overthinks time and again, and despite his security in his skills, he can still doubt himself—overanalyze their current match and future plays against stronger teams. but when he glances over to the stands, seeing you already watching him with a worried frown, he lets go of his worries for a moment, let's his eyes bore into yours as you mouth a 'you've got this, i know you do.' as akaashi nods in return.

he's got this, you both know it. you've got him.

akaashi can truly get carried away overthinking things, yet when you tap his shoulder to snap him out of glooming thoughts, placing your hand atop his as you give him a reassuring smile, it keeps him from spiraling—keeps him sane. and akaashi takes a deep breath at that, attention fixed on you because somehow you're the only person he can openly rely on.

you're always one step ahead, by akaashi's side and advising him he shouldn't give into the anxiety. you know him too well, and it scares him.

akaashi often feels he isn't good enough for you, he knows that you're better off with someone who's confident in themselves. but you're already shooting him down and declaring that you don't want anyone else. you want him, and you choose him every-fucking-day because you love him as he is.

flaws and all, you're quick to tell him that you're both lucky.

product of its-weeping ;༊ | do not plagiarize or translate.

[dramaticallytotal]

TDWT Headcanons Pt. 1

Just some headcanons for World Tour!

• Lindsay can sew very well. She taught herself after some wardrobe malfunctions. She can hand sew and machine! She is learning how to crochet and knit as well. So she was excited to practice during the boat weaving challenge.

• The network Chris works for is called Drama Productions.

• When Noah becomes his assistant, Chris gets him a custom red sweater vest to wear instead of the red or blue button ups the rest of the crew wear. It's still the same red, except it now has an anagramed DP on the left breast. This leads to the nickname Danny Phantom.

• As seen in one of my previous posts: Trent and Eva also get into World Tour. Eva because Noah pretended to be asleep and clung to her so he wouldn't be alone with Owen and Izzy for the competition even if he loves them. And Trent because he accidentally got knocked out. (Flimsy, I know, but he's such a good guy that the only way he wouldn't have left the bus would be because he's incapacitated.

• A lot of contestants made deals with Chris and the producers for more money. I.e., Lindsay forgetting Tyler's name, Ezekiel going feral, Duncan and Courtney's breakup but they refuse to make it a cheating plot. Gwen and Duncan are just best friends in this one. Also, Alejandro and Heather have deals to try and have a showmance if they can work it. Oh, and DJ's animal curse.

• That is kind of blown out of the water when Alejandro meets Noah. He falls fast and hard. He still tries to do the showmance with Heather because, hey, money is money. But he also is always helplessly flirting with Noah.

• Once Noah is on the show, the producers quickly realize that, basically, nothing gets done, and everything seems to be falling apart without this 17 year old. Which is sad. That's what they end up arguing with Chris about in China and such because Noah won the aftermath challenge to get back in the competition.

• He wasn't originally going to do so, but he did it out of pure spite for the producers.

• Chris and Chef do pseudo adopt Noah, and they are doing their best not to show him any favoritism. But if they sneak him some snacks and books here and there, who's gonna know?

• None of the animals will attack Alejandro because of his animal thing, Noah, because he trained and wrangled them all before, and Izzy but that's because she either can communicate with them or because they are scared of her.

• Trent and Gwen still have feelings for each other but don't know how to tell each other, so it leads to a lot of tension.

• Ezekiel, Harold, Alejandro, Noah, and Izzy are all polygots. Ezekiel, Noah, and Izzy all tie for the most with 8 languages under their belts.

• Eva, Courtney, and Heather are all bilingual.

• Cody, Sierra, Alejandro, Owen, Trent, and Bridgette all have big sweet tooths! But Trent and Alejandro try to hide it.

• The plane is actually two-leveled with a hidden top level where the crew and staff stay. Chris and Chef also have rooms up there, but for appearances sake they stay in the ones on the bottom floor. (Chris may have made up a room for Noah)

• Noah talked Chris out of the grand piano and jacuzzi before the plane was rented. Also, yeah, the plane is just made to look like it's falling apart. The holes that randomly appear in the show are just stunts made purely for the sick producers who believe the plane is an old rust bucket.

• The intern deaths are also stunts.

• Everyone is scared of Sierra but do their best to protect Cody from here. And when she gets in a mood when she remembers the "Noco" moment from season one, then everyone protects or hides Noah.

• I don't know if I'm going to give her a redemption this season or for All Stars, but basically she doesn't get voted out for so long because the producers are making Chris keep her on the show because she is good drama for the ratings.

• Team Chris + Eva all take turns sleeping with Noah due to his sleep cuddling with the exception of Tyler and Alejandro until it accidentally happens, and both just accept it. It ends up becoming a whole plane thing. With the exceptions being Cody and Sierra since she will not let that happen again. Even Heather let's it happen, but only because it helps keep them both warm, not because she's secretly fond of the dweeb or anything.

• Leshawna and Heather are pretty good friends this season, but Alejandro does mess with this friendship. It's only after the show that the two girls rekindle.

Part two

[doodlingbiscuit]

Hide N' Seek

This sprouted up from a childhood habit that I did when I was feeling really bad. I feel like how terrifying the turtles could be to the reader isn't touched on enough. The turtles would actually scare the heck out of me if I'm being honest. This Raph also holds a place in my heart, Enjoy!! <33

Bayverse!Raph x Reader - Hurt/Comfort

Words: 2,506

Warnings: None

The day had seemed to go on forever and you were beyond grateful when the clock finally ticked to 5 pm. You rushed out of the office and after a thankfully uneventful commute home, you popped some leftovers into the microwave, with your leg now bouncing in anticipation of doing something. You mulled over your choices, using the dull hum of the microwave as white noise. 

There were plenty of things to occupy your time; New York had its fair share of things to do, along with your long list of neglected chores. But… it's been a while since you’ve seen Raph and the other turtles so chores could wait one more day. You hadn’t seen them in a while and it’d be good to break up the droning schedule of only going to and from work. Scarfing down a quick dinner and you were out of the house in minutes. 

The lair was… uncharacteristically quiet. 

Curious, you made your way further into the space to see if they had left a note about where they had gone. They left their fair share of notes, which had evolved into them putting a permanent bulletin board up in the kitchen. You all had decided to keep it updated when the turtles would be gone for an extended amount of time. Per Donnie’s advice, it wasn’t a good idea for the brothers to text that they were leaving the lair undefended. Texting could easily be hacked and well… that was that. Squinting at the board, sure enough, you see in Leo’s scrawling handwriting that they would be out for a few hours. 

You flopped down onto the couch and made yourself at home, dragging a blanket off of the back of the couch to fend off the chill of the lair. You go through the motions of playing on your phone, doodling, and looking at your phone again. The hours had begun to take a toll on you and your eyelids had grown heavy. You start to wonder if they’re even going to be back tonight. 

“You never listen!”

You sit up a little straighter, immediately recognizing Leo’s voice. 

“I never listen?!” Raph lets out an incredulous laugh. “How about you never listening to your team!” 

Cold dread spilled into your stomach, fingers gripping a little tighter onto your phone. You hated it when any of the brothers fought, but it always seemed to be worse with Leo and Raph. 

You sunk deeper into the couch as you heard them getting closer. You knew in your heart Raph meant well, but more often than not, his anger would get the better of him. These outbursts would make it impossible to have a productive conversation with him. Raph was working on controlling his temper in your relationship, but Leo obviously wasn't granted the same sympathy. 

 Glancing towards the entrance, you spot Donnie and Mikey coming in first. 

You gave them both a sympathetic look; you knew that they hated it when their brothers fought with each other. They both shot you a sympathetic look in return, knowing you would have to deal with Raph after his outburst. 

“I just- I can’t deal with this right now, I’ve got more important things to concern myself with.” “Yeah, sure, go concern yourself with something better than your own brother.” Raph huffs out, shrugging off some of his gear onto the kitchen table. 

You get off of the couch and warily make your way into the kitchen area.

“Raph, can we-” Your face must’ve given away your displeasure with the current situation because Raph immediately took it as something against him. “Oh, so you’re on his side too!”

“Why does it always have to be about picking sides?!”

“‘Cause it feels like nobody ever is on mine!”

“I am on your side!” You tell him empathetically. 

“Then fucking act like it!” He slams his hand into the kitchen counter, leaving a huge dent in the side of it. 

Your eyes flicker towards the counter, a painful reminder of how strong the mutants were compared to you. 

Usually, you found his strength endearing; using it to protect the ones he cared about, but now you were unfortunately on the other end, where he could very easily use that strength against you. 

You feel the tears start to sprout up in the corners of your eyes and you try in vain to swallow the painful lump in your throat. 

Crying would get you nowhere.

“You can’t just start hitting things and then think you won!” Your voice cracks, “Use your words!” 

He walks over to you, pushing into your space, and forces you to walk backward until your back hits the wall. 

Raph was taller than you by about a foot. You’ve always known that Raph was bigger than you, that was obvious enough, but he had never used his size to intimidate you like this. 

He lets out an animalistic growl before speaking. “My ability to hit fast and hit hard is what this team needs me for and I’ve solved plenty of problems before just by knocking ‘em out.”

He slams his hands into the wall about your head, the vibrations traveling down the wall into your body.

“I don’t need them, I don't need your bickering and I certainly don’t need you!”

You scrunch up your face in anger at his outburst. Tears are threatening to fall from your eyes and it takes all you have in you to not let them. 

He stands there for a moment, chest heaving in and out. You stare back up at him in anger. His eyes dart back and forth between yours before shoving himself off the wall with a grunt. Cracking his knuckles, he stalks away heading towards his room. 

As soon as he’s out of sight, you push yourself off the wall. A few tears escape from your eyes and you drag a haphazard hand across your face to brush them off. 

You let out a growl of frustration, mad at Raph and mad at yourself for crying. 

It was so fucking embarrassing. 

You storm over to the couch, snatching up your backpack; you had brought stuff over to spend the night and now you just felt stupid. You stuffed your blanket from the couch into your bag. You ripped your earbuds out of your bag, shoving them into your ears. 

The trip home was a blur. 

You caught the subway home, trying in vain not to look like you were just crying your eyes out. Once you finally make it to your apartment, you shove through your door, tossing your backpack to the ground.

You were still reeling after the fight with Raph. Fuck. Him. 

A sob escapes your throat and you dig the palms of your hand into your eyes in an attempt to stop the tears. 

You just needed somewhere to hide, you just felt too exposed out in the living room. Walking into your room, you head straight for the closet, shoving aside the hanging shirts and make a little alcove for yourself in the closet. Nudging the door shut with a foot, making everything go pitch black. 

The tears start flowing out of your eyes as your fight sinks into you fully. 

He doesn’t need me?

Choked breaths come in and out of you and you can’t seem to get enough air in. 

You sit there for an undetermined amount of time, letting the calmness of being alone sink into you. Your playlists play on a loop and there's comfort in the songs you know by heart. After a while, your tears have dried and there's an uncomfortable feeling in your throat but you’re too lazy to go soothe it with water so you sit there numbly, still pushed up against the closet wall. 

There’s a knock from outside; a dull echo on the glass window of your apartment. You take out one of your earbuds as you strain to listen, almost brushing it off as something you misheard from your song. The knock comes again and you’re certain it was coming from your balcony. The turtles often came over to your house and instead of risking being seen, they came in through your balcony. 

Though today, you weren’t in any mood to go up and let them in formally, wishing that they would get the message and go away. It’s not like you exactly looked very presentable after crying for two hours. 

“(Y/N)?” A gruff voice sounded from outside. 

Your heart started beating fast. 

It was Raph.

“(Y/N)? Let me in, I wanna talk.” 

God, why’d it have to be him? 

You were still mad at him and if you were being honest, a little afraid of him too. You shoved yourself farther into the closet, trying to be completely still. 

The balcony door slides open and his footsteps start to pad around the room. 

You keep silent as you listen to him walk around, trying to calm your racing heart. Raph walks to the kitchen and then to the living room.

He calls out your name again. “Where are you?” 

You hope he’ll just leave you in peace and let you come to him on your own terms, you didn’t exactly want him to find you hiding in the closet. The closet door creaks open. He peeks his head into the closet, his eyes glazing over the closet until he finds you. Raph looks at you for a moment and you quickly wipe away the tears still drying on your face. 

“Are you… hiding from me?” He breathes. 

Opening the door fully, he stands in the doorway. He’s so tall that his head grazes the top of the doorway. 

You look up at him with wide eyes, searching in his gaze for that anger you saw earlier today. You take time to find your voice. 

“No.” You lie. 

You can tell that he doesn’t believe it and guilt flashes across his face. 

“I deserve it, you know.” 

You immediately try to counteract his words, but he holds a hand up as he continues. 

“No, I do.”

You close your mouth. 

His eyes move down to the spot next to you and he gestures to it.

“Can I?” 

You silently nod up at him, still processing what you want to say to him. 

With some effort on his part, he slides next to you in the closet. He’s so much wider than you that he has to sit at an angle to be able to fit next to you. Raph groans with the effort of sitting down with his legs sitting outside the door of the closet. He keeps his eyes downcast on his hands wringing them together. 

“I-I’m sorry for how I reacted today,” His eyes flicker up to yours. “It wasn’t directed towards you, I just-” He takes a breath. “I get so angry sometimes and I get even angrier when I can acknowledge it’s over something so small. It snowballs into something worse.” 

“I know how that feels,” you whisper, “I get really angry too sometimes, for the stupidest of things,” You half-heartedly laugh. 

“Honestly, I need someone to keep me in check. It keeps me accountable and makes me think before I speak.” Your eyes flick up to him. “But I need someone who can get angry and acknowledge how they’re feeling without taking it out on someone else. I am your s/o. I want to be there for you, but I can’t do that if you scare me away. I am always willing to listen and try to help you through what you’re feeling.”

There’s a beat of silence as he processes your words. 

“I’m sorry.” He breathes out. 

You scooch over until your head is leaning on his side. You take his hand into yours and slowly lace your fingers with his. His hand is so much bigger than yours and it makes you pause at the size difference. You stare at your entwined fingers. 

“I forgive you.” 

 His grip tightens on your fingers. Firm and reassuring. 

You two sit in silence, relishing in each other's company. 

Raph shifts a bit in his spot, trying in vain to cover up how uncomfortable he is in the cramped space. 

A half-hearted huff leaves you. “Cramped?”

He grunts a bit, “M’ fine.”

…

“...are you sure?” 

He lets out another grunt in affirmation.

You scoot a little bit forward, thrusting a foot forward and standing up in one fell swoop. Wobbling a bit as you stand, Raph by instinct, catches your hand in his and steadies you. Stepping out of the closet, you turn around and look at Raph as he gazes back up at you. 

Your head tilts slightly as you eye him in the closet space- he really did look huge. If you squint a bit, you would almost be able to see a blush forming across his cheeks as he avoids eye contact with you. 

“A little help here?”

And even though he was just asking for your help out of pure formality, you appreciated the sentiment. You offer a hand out to him and he takes it, but never actually puts any of his weight on it. Along with some help from the closet doorway, he rises to his full height once again.

He reaches over to flick on a lamp in the room, the light catching on the tear stains running down your cheek. Eyebrows scrunching together, his face sets into one of steely determination. 

“Stay.” Raph grunts it out lowly but softly before walking out of the room.

You stand there awkwardly, waiting for him to return. 

He clatters around in the kitchen for a bit, opening and closing cabinets. 

Curious, you tilt your head to the side, trying to catch a glimpse of him through the cracked bedroom door, before you’re startled out of your thoughts as he walks back into the room. 

Raph’s eyes immediately cast onto the ground as he walks towards you, almost as if he was still afraid of scaring you off. He holds a glass of water and a wet rag in his hands. “Here.” He says, almost under his breath and hands you the glass of water. Pleasantly surprised that he remembered that your throat gets sore after crying for so long, you take a few sips as you look at the washcloth in his hand, wondering why he had it. 

Lifting the washcloth to your face, he waits for a nod from you before swiping it gently under your eyes, soothing the heat that had gathered there. You look up at him and catch the gentleness in which he regards you. You see none of that anger from before and the anger he did have was only directed at himself now. 

Raph was… complicated but then again so were you. Relationships were supposed to go both ways and you trusted him to hold up his part of the bargain. 

You could both work this out.

[jesncin]

If you had to rank all the justice league fams ( superfam, batfam, martianfam, etc ) from least favorite to most favorite, how would you do it ?

Ooh I'm not familiar with all the cape-fams that well so I don't know how much of a proper ranking I can do, so here's just a random vibes tier list:

Martianfam: In canon (i guess this consists of just J'onn and M'gann, Jem if we're reaching), they're a mess. I'll save this for the 2nd part of the upcoming Ma'al essay, but Martianfam's biggest problem is having undefined relationships that don't take advantage of a proper family dynamic. Canonically F tier. However,,,I'm obsessed with my version of Martianfam so that bias puts Martianfam in theoretical S tier.

Superfam: So much potential in this fam to be generational immigrant/diaspora angst and tension only for canon to be so uncreative with the legacy characters (minus Kong Kenan). This fam suffers from overreliance on clones and alternate universe versions of existing characters tied to Clark's Kryptonian genes (the adopted twins, Kong, and the Steels are a good change of pace). Jon and Conner (and sometimes even Kara) are suffering being, what I like to call, a "Clark Kent factory product". They're too scared to make these boys different from dad. Conner Superboy is in limbo with Jon taking over. What is going on with Powergirl being infantilized now. However,,, if the immigrant allegory was critically applied to Superfam? Theoretical S tier. Canonically C tier.

Batfam: Undoubtedly the strongest of the cape-fams in DC. Even with their flaws and how they've been modernized, this is still the blueprint. What's there cultivates an intense fanbase and there's such a diversity in the backgrounds of each Batfam member and how they evolved. Each member has a unique relationship with Bruce, many characters are capable of sustaining their own solos, they have relationships with each other, gosh it's a lot. I'm affectionately putting this in A tier, shaving some points off for stuff like erasing Babs' disability, characters like Steph but especially Duke being sidelined, the girls being infantilized as the boys get to grow into men, whitewashing Damian, etc.

Wonderfam: I can only speak based on vibes here, but gosh you deserve so much better, Wonderfam. I feel like each member should deeply explore a new facet of womanhood different from Diana to freshen up each time a new legacy character joins the Wonderfam (Nubia's great at this from what I've seen). I love that this fam includes Themyscirans and sometimes ordinary girls (even if that gets retconned a bunch). I eyeroll from a distance whenever it's really obvious that the male-dominated writers of DC try adding men into Wonderfam as a means of focusing attention away from women (cough Diana's bro). But also. Kick Trinity out of Wonderfam. I have never seen a character so universally behated but I get it. Unfortunately D tier. I want better for this fam though.

GL fam: Really good! They're a unique fam in that being a part of the GL corp means being a part of the fam, so you get people from all sorts of backgrounds that don't have to be related to a main character. Theoretically this can even extend to other lantern colors whenever the GLs team up with baddies like Razer or Sinestro. You can arrange different groups or pairs of GLs to form their own Star-Trek esque team. And that's such a fun time when that happens. I'm not in GL fandom enough to know the nuances of some narrative flaws or anything, so I'm giving the GL fam a vibes based S tier. They just work! And they're unique while doing it.

Flashfam: I can only speak based on vibes here but whatever's going on with Flash fam just looks like such a fun time. From what I've seen and read, so many of the characters are funny and endearing. I love that there are many twins in this fam. That's just a bias for me. My biggest nitpick with Flashfam is that it suffers from over-convoluted origin stories. That's kind of a problem baked into the dough when your powers intersect with time travel, but it adds a layer of inaccessibility when some of the character's backstories are so convoluted. Vibes based B tier.

Aquafam: Mostly vibes based impression again since I don't really go here but I've met the characters a good amount of times. Arthur has a special theoretical space in my heart as someone borne of two cultures. We're here for that mixed diaspora struggle. I enjoy the rivalry he has with his brother, I think Mera has a lot of potential as a love interest and wifeguy (and she has an evil twin so, bonus in my book), and aquababy. Hah. I enjoy the many ways Aqualad has been reinterpreted across media. However! Kaldur/Jackson is definitely the most interesting addition to the family, imo! I'm all for villains or villain-adjacent characters being on Team Hero. I also like Black Manta. Petty baddie we respect. Uuh vibes based B tier. I'll theoretically bump this up to S tier if all Aquafam members walked out of the ocean to the H20 "Just Add Water" theme song.

Arrowfam: I'm embarrassingly unknowledgeable with Arrowfam members so we're doing vibes. On vibes they're like Batfam adjacent but sound way more interesting. Oliver Queen is a great messy character, and I like seeing each member have a different complex relationship to him. I'm very endeared to Roy/Arsenal/Speedy, his villain will-they-won't-they romance and baby dad plot is inherently interesting. I also love Connor Hawke!! Blasian ace king fr. And I adore Black Canary. She has so much going on and still checks in on this fam too. Idk if it's controversial of me, but A tier based on vibes.

Constantinefam: SIKE this loser doesn't have friends or family they're all dead. S tier. If DC is pushing DC!Johnstantine into a family or partnership dynamic with JL Dark, Zatanna, or Xanthe Zhou? Theoretical F tier.

Haha this was fun to write, thank you for the fun ask! Nice to ramble about the various fams of the DC world.

[dr-spectre]

WE DID IT!!!!!!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE!!!!! This is such a big milestone. Halfway until 1000 followers... that's absolutely insane!!

This will be the last follower update until we reach 1000. But, I wanna share something special with you all and get rather personal...

So, about a year ago, I wanted to learn how to draw because I was feeling depressed about "not being productive enough." Basically I got sucked into the bullshit productivity self help stuff that wants to turn your life into a cold calculated work obsessed nightmare, rather than living in the moment due to fear mongering about the future and how "if you don't grind now you WILL be a failure and die alone and get no pussy." (No wonder I picked Team Present for the Grand Fest...)

Plus I dropped out of uni at the time and welp, to put it lightly, I was feeling fucking god awful and I was scared into basically "putting in the hard work" by all these self help channels and other bullshit online. Whatever the FUCK that vague shit means, my autistic brain still doesn't get it.

It was BY FAR the worst period of my life, but, at least I tried to do SOMETHING. And I wanna show you all some of the things that I drew last year....

This was between October 2023 to February 2024. I stopped drawing due to it causing me much frustration and anger.

So yeah! Uh... enjoy?

So.... not the best work you've seen, right? HAHAHAHAHA!

Would you freak out if I told you that I got upset and damaged a book and a fan because I got so mad at myself over not being able to draw or do anything right?...

I feel like this ain't for me, and you know what? That's okay! I've learnt that it's okay to try new things, it's okay to experiment and if shit doesn't work then it doesn't work. Plain and simple. It's perfectly fine to give up and try something else.

You are not a robot, you are a human being. Don't feel like you "gotta do something everyday otherwise you'll die alone and you'll be broke and you'll never be successful and you'll be forgotten!!"

Do feel pressured to feel like you have to "find your thing" or "be productive" or whatever kind of... heh.... BRAINWASHING you hear online.

I wanted to draw because I was jealous of others, including my friends who are skilled artists... and I did it for the wrong reasons which is why I stopped in February.

I am very happy that I've decided to actually focus on what i like doing and what gives me energy. A quote that has stuck with me for years now is a quote by Jordan Peele from an interview, and it's basically this-

"Follow the fun." And you know what? He's right. Following what gives you that good good boost of dopamine while also feeling like you're accomplishing something is one of the best feelings EVER!!!! Whether it's art, writing, modelling, sculpting, architecture, making music, acting, clay sculptures, etc. FOLLOW THE FUN!! FOLLOW THE SHIT THAT EXCITES YOU!!! I literally always have multiple projects spiralling around in my head all the time and cycling between them at every given moment.

I'm not even saying do only what makes you comfortable or be lazy either, do shit that makes you go "BRING IT ON!!!! I WANNA DO THIS!!!" Get that blood pumping!!! Challenge yourself fairly!!!! There's healthy and unhealthy stress. Healthy stress should make you feel like a fucking PREDATOR!!! AN ANIMAL ON THE HUNT!!! While unhealthy stress makes you feels like you're the prey, the one who's being chased by an unknown force that's out to get you!!

I feel like I'm kinda rambling... anyways!!! ENOUGH WITH THE INSPIRATIONAL BULLSHIT!!! THANK YOU ALL!!!!!! 99% of you have been awesome and incredible!!!

It's also been an honor to get to know so many people who feel the same way as I do about a certain squid lady and her best friends.... before I went onto tumblr I genuinely felt so alone and so insane. I felt isolated, I felt like no one saw these characters the way that I do... I thought my perspective of a certain squid lady and her rebel phase was invalided and false... But now I know that I have people who have my back and understand what I'm trying to express...

One final time, thank you. I'll keep going.

STAY FRESH!!!!!!!!!!

[ericmicael]

Those moments when I feel a little bad for being a Disney fan. And it's always the same shitty justification for excluding LGBT subjects, if they're going to exclude them just because they're afraid of reactions from homophobic people, why do they still pretend to try to include them in other productions or create these plots just to discard them when they see the first idiot executive?

It's always very frustrating because you can see that there are good people out there trying to do something, but they always get censored by some idiot executive.

As a fan of Elsa being a lesbian theories, this is the kind of thing that makes me scared for the future. I'm already scared that Disney will completely scrap the Northuldra tribe, that they'll just use them to say they have indigenous representation, but then immediately throw the characters out of the movie and replace them with beings with powers just because they think they'll be more popular in marketing… And it wouldn't even be the first time Disney has done this, since they released an anthology celebrating the franchise's 10th anniversary and the Northuldra were treated as completely disposable parts.

Fortunately, as is almost always the case with these censorships or discarded themes, things end up leaking. There are concept arts of other scenes between Elsa and Honeymaren that were cut from "Frozen 2", and we have the deleted scene from "Win Or Lose".

And as in all cases, they are simple scenes, innocent scenes, a more affectionate moment between two female characters and a character in doubt about which bathroom to use, scenes that had no reason to be discarded, but still are. It is really frustrating.

[spoonfulofmilo]

Could you do fic for James Vowles with wife author!reader? ( He's at Williams ) He always goes to her events even though he's busy but he still makes time just to support her. And vice versa. Just something fluff and cute. Thanks!! :))

this is definitely not amazing, but im secretly quite happy with it

(also updates are gonna slow the fuck down because i have assessments and exams this term yay /s)

my masterlist can be accessed here

Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.

also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better

and if you want to be added to my taglist lmk :)

james vowles x wife!author!reader

---

book talk:

Y/N watched as a teenage girl walked up to the microphone. She clearly looked nervous, as had many other people coming up, but Y/N tried to make her feel as at ease as possible.

“Um…hey Y/N, my name is Elodie, and I just wanted to say how much I love your writing…” - Elodie

James quietly shut the door, once Logan and Alex were through, and didn’t try and push through the crowded room, they instead settled for a spot near the back where they could still see Y/N. They were sure that if people recognised them, they would be shunted towards the front or ushered backstage. They didn’t want that, they just wanted to stay inconspicuous at the back.

“Aww thank you Elodie, what was your question?” Y/N smiled reassuringly

“Um…well, for your book, ‘a sweet sting of salt’, I was just wondering if you had any inspiration for the character Tobias. While he isn’t the best character in the story, you said he was one of your favourite characters to write, and I was just wondering why?” Eloise asked

“Oh, that is a good question, thank you Elodie. Um… while the actions are obviously not based on him, a lot of Tobias’ so-called ‘good’ elements are actually based on my husband. So…okay I’m gonna hope that everyone has read the book, so I don’t spoil it,” she smiled “Um, so for those of you who are unaware, my husband is James Vowles, and he is the Team Principal of Williams, which is a motorsport for those who are very out of the loop. So I guess the main words I would use to describe both Tobias and James, other than loving because Tobias is definitely not, are logical, quiet, grounded, organised and productive.”

James smiles, watching his wife talk about something she was so passionate about.

“So for example, for logical qualities for Tobias and James in chapter 10, Tobias uses deductive reasoning, which I would like to say is James’ strong suit, however he sometimes misuses it, like deducing who ate the chocolate, the wife or the dog. Tobias uses it for more evil, using it for working out how to do the things he does. Maybe they are more evil and similar and similar.” Y/N pondered, garnering a small laugh from the audience

James stopped smiling, as he listened to his wife compare him to a literal murderer in her book. Logan and Alex were standing next to him, trying to avoid their laughs.

“Then for quiet, in chapter 16, James likes sneaking around and scaring the shit out of me when he gets back from the factory and from races to scare the shit out of me, and Tobias uses it for murder. Huh, maybe these 2 characters are closer together than I thought.” Y/N pondered, laughing as she saw her husband’s face

“Darling, I’m not a thief and a murderer. I honestly don’t know why you based Tobias off of me.” James tried to mediate.

However it was enough for Alex and Logan to burst out laughing, joining in with the rest of the crowd, who had discovered that James was there and found it very funny.

“I’m just saying you share similar qualities, more than I initially insisted. Are you sure you didn’t secretly murder someone?” Y/N tilted her head, as if genuinely thinking about the question

“Darling…” James tried to plead again

“ANYWAY - Then for grounded, in chapter 18…” - Y/N, moved on, continuing with her ideas.

---

garage:

“And during this safety car period, Alex, our camera man has gone for a wander and he has gone down to the Williams garage, and while we’re normally looking at the team principal or other important people, we have instead zoomed in on Y/N Vowles. Now for those who don’t know, she is a writer, and she seems pretty hard at work at this book on her laptop. Now that will be good news for anyone who reads her books, including me, she writes very good books, available at all the awesome book stores, and no she hasn’t paid us for that, we just think her books are amazing. Oh and she waved at us. Hi Y/N!” - Jolyon said from the commentary box

James smiled at the sight of Y/N on his screen. While this weekend had been very stressful, it was very nice having his wife be there for him in the garage and then back at the hotel rooms, even after all the late meetings. He watched as she smiled and waved at the screen, and he was unable to resist the temptation as he smiled at the picture and waved back, earning another laugh from the commentators.

---

book talk part 2:

“Sorry Y/N, my name is Leo, this is a bit of a personal question…” a teenage boy asked

“...as long as it’s not when I’m having a baby, or where I live, it should be okay, hit me!”  Y/N tried to put him at ease.

“Your schedule for this book tour is a little all over the place, if you don’t mind me saying, it was basically like the first 2 months of the year, and now there’s just kinda weeks off or even months off, and I was just wondering if there was any sense to the schedule.” Leo shuffled awkwardly, unsure of how she would react to the question.

“Ah, well there actually is. First off, I cannot tour every week of the year, because I think I would just simply die. But the reason I picked those weeks off is because if my husband again. Are you guys sensing a pattern here? I love James, and I really want to support him at all the f1 races. So those are the weeks I took off, basically. And second, Baby Vowles is due in 6 months, thanks guys!” Y/N laughed as she put down the microphone and walked off stage, laughing as the cheers from the crowd grew louder.

---

taglist: @leosxrealm, @tallrock35, @wolf-knights, @janeholt3, @pear-1206