#i have 24 gifs and am only gonna use at most 8 and i can't add more to the uploader once i already have any on the thing

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Well... at lease we have Wandee & Stand-in?

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

May 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

Wandee Godday (Sat YT) ep 4 of 12 - The geept is strong with this one AKA Yak CAN flirt. Wandee now knows he isn’t the only one with a crush on someone else. AND YET they are SO DAMN CUTE together. I do wonder sometime if Yak is running a counter con with Dee pretending to have a crush on Taem. Meanwhile, mad props on the HPV vax public service! Good for them!!! Now that's my kind of product placement. I do have a feeling the sad bit with these two is gonna be VERY sad and last longer than we like. 

My Stand-In (Thai Fri iQIYI) ep 5 of 12 eps - It’s a riveting show. Pleasant? No. Riveting? Yes. Tiny crumbs for Ming’s assistant. Joe is best boy. That is all. I LOVE this show.

We Are (Weds iQIYI) ep 8 of 16 - TOO MANY SOUND EFFECTS. Omg get your fingers off those buttons you computer wanking sound dude (you know it’s a dude) what tf do you think this is? Lovely Writer? Also, they left ALL their drinks! Can you not walk and drink at the same time in a BL? Meanwhile not much happened that hadn’t already happened AKA bit of a filler ep. That said, the friendship group stuff is glorious!!! Also this brand of super gentle flirting suits PondPhuwin better than any of their prior rolls. It reminds me of how much I think they suit a historical. There is a gentle dignity to these two. 

Only Boo! (Sun YouTube) ep 7 of 12 - I love how kindly the turn down was. But most of the dancing stuff was dull. I don’t know I just find the actor playing Kang pretty vacant of appeal I guess. 

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

At 25:00 in Akasaka AKA 25 Ji Akasaka de (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 6 of 10 - As is not uncommon with JBL I’m being to get frustrated with Yuki the Uke. Sigh. I’m probably gonna stay that way for several episodes given the pacing of this show. 

Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 7 of 10 - Also frustrating. Willful misunderstanding. We got us some running of the gays but boy is this drawn out. 

Blossom Campus (Korea Thurs Gaga & iQIYI) ep 3-4 of 6 - The puppy is a bit too much sunshine innocent for me. And the professor is a bit creepy. I don't know, I'm not loving this one like I want to.

It's airing but...

You Made My Day (Thai YT) ep 1 of 5 - mini series staring the I Will Knock You couple Tar & Bom, started but I couldn't find it. I also didn't try very hard.

The Time of Fever AKA Unintentional Love Story 2 (Korea movie) trailer released to Korean theaters 5/25. HoTae & DongHee, side couple from Unintentional Love Story are back! Same actors, same character names. I love them. I NEED TO SEE THIS. How?

OMG Vampire (Thai Sun ????) ep 2 of 10 - yeah I can't find it.

In case you missed it

Crossing my fandoms moment, major Kpop blog ran the following: OMEGA X Hangyeom Talks Jazz For Two, Brotherhood, And More With KpopStarz

Tis the season of remakes? Both Addicted Heroin (August, my love!) and My Love Mix-Up (G4!) are coming from Thailand. I am very excited to see both. I love a Thai remake, often more than the original.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

May Releases

VBL (Taiwan) is releasing 4 'Special Episode' epilogues to their 4 2023 shows every Friday this month on Gagaoolala, Viki & Viu. Not sure on search terms or how to find these. (Or, frankly, if we need them.)

5/10 – You Are Mine

5/17 – VIP Only

5/24 – Stay By My Side

5/31 – Anti Reset

5/28 My Biker 2 (Thai movie YT?) - trailer

5/30 Knock Knock Boys (Thai Thurs WeTV & Gaga) - I do love Best and I'm interested in seeing him in a new pairing. That said, I'm not wild about Seng. Still, this looks like a chaotic pulpy mess, I'm looking forward to wallowing in it one way or another.

5/31 The Time of Huannan (Taiwan movie) - May not be BL

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

All Wandee Gooday.

Icky no longer allows screen shots or there would have been a bunch from Stand-in.

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are a pain.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @sunflower-positiiivity

@rocketturtle4 @blglplus @anythinggoesintheshire @everlightly @renafire @mestizashinrin @bl-bam-beyond @small-dark-and-delicious @saezurumurmurs

Sigh, Tumblr in it's infinate wisdom doesn't like too many tags.

There's these tricks, remember:

[isa-the-great-and-powerful]

I posted 455 times in 2022

That's 432 more posts than 2021!

123 posts created (27%)

332 posts reblogged (73%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@lizzy-frizzle

@acybernetickiwi

@dimhortons

@rubynyoro-n

@empressviolet

I tagged 250 of my posts in 2022

Only 45% of my posts had no tags

#trans - 79 posts

#transgender - 79 posts

#blonde - 47 posts

#blue eyes - 45 posts

#trans is beautiful - 41 posts

#plaid skirt - 10 posts

#pleated skirt - 8 posts

#legs - 8 posts

#skirt - 8 posts

#leggings - 8 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#as someone who is unsure if i am decided or not i went with rose since it sounded pretty +knew some friends that had it and really liked it

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

It's just... Scar calling Pearl, Nigel Thornberry... Ahahaha, oh man And Now I can't unhear it.

25 notes - Posted September 13, 2022

#4

Trans parkour girl over here. Had a great time at Cincy Jam. :)

26 notes - Posted October 17, 2022

#3

I was inspired a few days ago by allosaurusfragilis and her dino/trans artwork. I made this because I realized I had a lot of things about me that make me unique or rare. I am left handed, I am on the autistic spectrum, I have the rarest myers briggs for males...(infj/p) thus why me being a trans female makes more sense for that... and as stated by the last one, I am trans. All of that is celebrated here by being a unique unicorn, as rare as I am, but like also a badass because I am a dino as well! a Dinocorn!!

27 notes - Posted February 25, 2022

#2

Joe taking 40 mins to drag frogs all across the server and nether, just to put in a sewer next to his shop... that sells tadpoles... Great use of The Joe Hills Difference(tm) above logic.

29 notes - Posted September 29, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Got the first pin, then saw the spaceship one a few mins later at another booth. Yes, I am loved, but more importantly we are gonna abduct you. Look out for the Trans F.O. or don't look out for it and just let it get you.

80 notes - Posted April 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[wedding-shemp]

I posted 2,464 times in 2022

582 posts created (24%)

1,882 posts reblogged (76%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@catgirl-dannyelfman

@binomist

@naturallyoccurringminotaur

@z0mbievalentine

@literary-potat0

I tagged 621 of my posts in 2022

#acnh - 53 posts

#tunez - 15 posts

#spotify - 13 posts

#scream - 12 posts

#my art - 10 posts

#z0mbievalentine - 10 posts

#borderlands 2 - 6 posts

#king shit - 6 posts

#flashing - 6 posts

#bl2 - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#but like am i gonna go bloop da bloop heres 16gb of ram i got on amazon and try to put it into my computer only to discover its incompatibl

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

look man here's the thing. i hear people talking about ai "art" and saying "well it's bad that the datasets they're trained on are using stolen assets but the technology isn't inherently bad" and look. no. no, listen, the stolen assets are a symptom of a larger problem. these programs are made by and for people who see art as a commodity. that's why they feel entitled to art they do not own. framing this as "ai art would be fine if they used data they owned" is missing the forest for the trees. this contempt and hostility for working artists and their livelihood is a symptom and not a bug. you can't do an ethical version of technology whose end-goal is to eliminate the already shrinking pool of entry level art jobs. this is hateful vile technology that is going to have devestating consequences on the art community and the fact that I'm seeing people who dislike ai "art" being framed as snobby elitists who want to ruin other people's fun makes me want to chew glass. this is not hipsters being mean to poor widdle proletariat tumblr users who want free pictures of their ocs and can't afford a commission this is working artists who are already scramnling to stay afloat in an industry that devalues them at every turn watching techbros build a Push A Button And Free Art Comes Out machine and realizing that no matter how shitty that art is the people with money will choose free art over good art whenever they can. but you guys want to make this into Let People Enjoy Things. okay.

130 notes - Posted December 6, 2022

#4

obsessed with these new armed forces ads that are blatantly saying "modern life is empty and alienating, come join us to have a semblance of purpose" like not to be one of those armchair cult experts but are those not the exact same recruiting tactics of a cult

165 notes - Posted March 10, 2022

#3

Actually international woman's day was originally a pagan holiday that honored the pagan goddess Woom-hæn. They won't teach you this in high schools

265 notes - Posted March 8, 2022

#2

i know everything about it sucks on a deep systemic level but idk i thnk it's kind of adorable that england has a queen, like im sorry to you gus about the monarchy and all but its very very funny that you have one very old lady who is like the Head Old Lady and there's a big party going on about how long she has been the Head Old Lady. that's DEMENTED and I love it.

298 notes - Posted June 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

it is his birthday.....

430 notes - Posted June 26, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

the fact that two of my most reblogged from blogs were my own blogs...

[animmortalsneasler]

I posted 54 times in 2022

That's 54 more posts than 2021!

35 posts created (65%)

19 posts reblogged (35%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@pmd-waveringfate

@ask-the-sneasel-twins

@ask-a-poison-punk

@pokeask-musicfestival

@asktrainerzoroark

I tagged 53 of my posts in 2022

Only 2% of my posts had no tags

#sneasler - 39 posts

#lady sneasler - 37 posts

#pokeaskmusicfestival2022 - 24 posts

#response - 8 posts

#pokeask - 5 posts

#pokeaskblog - 5 posts

#pokemon ask blog - 5 posts

#hisuian zoroark - 4 posts

#pokemon askblog - 3 posts

#akira hisuian zoroark - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 47 characters

#gonna assume sneasler was suppose to be sneasel

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

(Shaymincafe) Scabiosa: Wow, a Sneasler! I don’t think I’ve ever seen a member of your kind in-person before. Are you from the past? Is it weird coming to a modern time?

@shaymincafe

Right back at you! A shaymin? You're the first one I've ever seen!

See the full post

12 notes - Posted September 9, 2022

#4

(@ask-a-staravia) "You were one of the only customers who's heard of potato mochi before, which makes me wonder- have you had some before?" Kaito asks the Lady Pokèmon.

@ask-a-staravia

I have! Akari and my warren would often bring some for me. They taste amazing!

See the full post

12 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

#3

The AI tried to briefly scan the pokemon in front of her, though she could not determine the species of pokemon at all, "Hm, strange, I can't seem to determine your species, Do you mind telling me what it is?"

Uhhhh....what were you doing? You don't know what a sneasler is? People and Pokemon really don't read up on ancient history, huh?

15 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

#2

(askadewott) Marilla@Lady: "Wow! I don't think I've ever seen a 'mon like you before! Ya like a huge Sneasel! Is it like a new undiscovered Pokémon speicies or somethin'?" The Dewott being fascinated. "Ahh! So sorry for bein' really excited! It's a bad habbit of mine!" The Dewott giggled. "So have ya found somethin' here that you enjoy yet? I'm still trying to get my bearings across here, but I'm sure you found somethin' here!"

@askadewott

It's alright, little one; I get that quite a lot. Guess not everyone knows about pokemon of the past. I'm a sneasler; we were in the hisui region, or Sinnoh as you know it. My species used to be the final evolution of sneasel, so you're not too far off the mark.

See the full post

17 notes - Posted September 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Ask-ingo: Ah Lady Sneasler ... I am....glad to see you here too.

@ask-ingo

Hm? Who called...

See the full post

39 notes - Posted September 8, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[akirasgalaxy]

I posted 255 times in 2022

That's 197 more posts than 2021!

57 posts created (22%)

198 posts reblogged (78%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@favonius-captain

@akirasgalaxy

@heizours

@witch-hazels-musings

@f-ai-n

I tagged 246 of my posts in 2022

Only 4% of my posts had no tags

#akira’s aspect ✧ - 70 posts

#interstellar rambles ☆ﾐ - 59 posts

#kaeya - 58 posts

#happy birthday kaeya - 42 posts

#stellar reads ☆ﾐ - 23 posts

#genshin impact - 21 posts

#reblogs - 19 posts

#akira’s orbit ✧ - 13 posts

#shooting stars ☆ﾐ - 9 posts

#stellar person: howlantic *⛧⋆ - 6 posts

Longest Tag: 105 characters

#ok but xiao coming to find you in pain and immediately blames his karmic debt and because of that himself

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Xiao during Lantern Rite: *Mentions his Karma can Affect People*

Angst Writers: I am gonna do what's called a 'pro gamer' move

14 notes - Posted February 8, 2022

#4

"We all lie. Even the truth."

Kaeya x gn!Reader

Trope Theme Thursday - Prompt 1

You had survived another wild goose chase. Another chase you were sent on by the infuriating captain of the knight's calvary. Another chase to get rid of a Treasure Hoarder camp, only to end up with having to fight mitachurls. And you were a little more than 'displeased' at the sight of the Calvary Captain sipping on wine while chatting with Patrons at the bar.

See the full post

24 notes - Posted February 4, 2022

#3

Darling~

⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ Kaeya x GN!Reader ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ Fluff (Comfort if you squint)

A/N: Written by someone who can't roll their r's for their life😔

See the full post

66 notes - Posted April 15, 2022

#2

How to deal with Headaches, by Kaeya

It's been a long day. Work has multiplied exponentially, and this small 5 minute break you are taking seems to be the only break you will take for a while. That is until Kaeya walks in.

Kaeya can already just see that you have a headache.

If it wasn't already obvious from how you were pinching the bridge of your nose and slumped posture.

So, he will summon a bit of Cyro to his finger tips, and begin to gently massage your head, especially your temples and generally rubbing his cooled hand over your head

"This should help, darling." *picks up papers* "I can take care fo this for you."

He will try to help, even is he is busy, he 100% knows someone who can help

Now for my reasoning as to why he knows how to do this works so well.

As teens, I can imagine that Diluc had lots of headaches. Being the youngest to join the knights must be quite headache inducing, and believe Kaeya tried helping him out ever now and then (platonically ofc).

Which includes giving head massages

But now they aren't as close...

So now usually he uses his vision to give himself massages when he having a hangover headache

76 notes - Posted January 4, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I forgot Venti was up there and got jumpscared by the sudden appearance

smh

110 notes - Posted July 17, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[babeydollx]

1000 Followers Celebration

(Requests Closed)

Oh my fucking god, I honestly can't believe I hit 1k followers. Honestly I am so shocked that I hot 1000 followers I never thought I'd make it this far. I have enjoyed this so much and I love writing fics and I love the amazing community I am in. I am so grateful for this and I owe it all to you guys so, thank you so much for everything.

I have picked and made some prompts. There are three categories which are smut, fluff and then comedy/silly ones. I was also going to add sad and scary prompts but decided against it, might do it soon though. I ask for prompts that the maximum picked per story is 5 and I only picked select characters just because there is a lot of prompts so I tried to pick out some of the most popular characters/people for this.

I will keep my requests open until Monday so you guys can send me your requests through 'ask me anything.' Depending on how many requests I get, it may take me awhile to finish them so please keep that in mind.

Characters I Write For:

Outer Banks:

All Characters can be chosen

OBX Cast:

Rudy Pankow

Drew Starkey

Chase Stokes

Austin North

The Vampire Diaries Universe:

Damon Salvatore

Stefan Salvatore

Katherine Pierce

Caroline Forbes

Lexi Branson

Klaus Mikaelson

Elijah Mikaelson

Kol Mikaelson

Marcel Gerard

Kai Parker

Rebekah Mikaelson

Riverdale:

Cheryl Blossom

Toni Topaz

Jughead Jones

Reggie Mantle

Veronica Lodge

Betty Cooper

Fangs Fogarty

Euphoria:

Maddy Perez

Cassie Howard

Nate Jacobs

Fezco

Smut Prompts:

1. "Don't make me take you home and punish you."

2. "You look so hot in my clothes."

3. "You're not going out in that outfit."

4. "You want me to give your (phone, book, etc.) back? Make me."

5. "Don't be so rough. You can't leave any marks."

6. "What the hell did you just say to me?"

7. "I'm going to leave hickies all over your body, let everyone know your mine."

8. "Bite me."

9. "Please just let me finish this level and I swear I'll fuck you just how you like it."

10. "You taste like fucking candy."

11. "You're not wearing anything under that, are you?"

12. "I could just pull your bikini bottom to the side, no one will notice."

13. "You're so fucking hot when you're mad."

14. "I'm not jealous! It's just... you're mine."

15. "Say it. Out loud."

16. "You better shut that pretty little mouth before I put it to work, doll."

17. "I'm gonna fuck you so hard that you'll forget that you ever even met that asshole."

18. "I think that's the first time I've ever herd you moan... it was like a fucking melody."

19. "She may seem like lollipops and rainbows but, I bet behind closed doors she's latex and whips."

20. "Yup, that's me. I love to fuck."

21. "Don't fucking touch what's not yours."

22. "Stop dancing like that or I'm going to cum in my pants."

23. "You look a bit tied up, want me to come back later?"

24. "Please, remind me again why we are having sex behind a tree?"

25. "We've been at it like rabbits! How the fuck are you still horny?!"

26. "Your ass is going to be seven different shades of red after that little stunt."

27. "God damnit! Now all I can think about is you licking my cock like it's that ice cream cone."

28. "Do you think they can hear us through the tent?"

29. "Your more than just a one night stand."

30. "Would you just shut up and kiss me already?"

31. "Let me show you why you should stay in bed."

32. "Can you help me with this zipper?"

33. "I bet you look even better with your clothes off."

34. "Are you trying to turn me on right now? Because it's working."

35. "I'd hold onto something if I were you."

36. "I see you've started without me."

37. "Want a taste?"

38. "Less talking, more fucking."

39. "You're really going to make me beg for it?"

40. "Are you going to eye fuck me all night or are you going to do something about it?"

41. "Please... don't stop."

42. "This cock isn't gonna suck itself."

43. "Please. I need you... now."

44. "Maybe I'd rather take my time with you."

45. "Is there anything you can't do with that tongue?"

46. "Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?"

47. "Oh god, how can you manage to switch from cute to sexy in under a second?"

48. "I know all your weaknesses."

49. "No panties, huh?"

50. "You herd me. Take. It. Off."

51. "Angel in the streets, freak in the sheets."

52. "Can you feel what you're doing to me?"

53. "Holy shit, you're so fucking sexy like that."

54. "How 'bout you come help me out, huh?"

55. "Don't think I'm letting you get away with that, darling."

56. "Dammit, we made a mess."

57. "You're gonna regret that, sweetheart."

58. "Were you dreaming about me again?"

59. "I want to see those pretty little lips wrapped around my cock."

60. "If you wanted sex, all you have to do is ask."

61. "Why are you naked?"

62. "You can't keep pretending like it didn't happen, cause guess what? It did!"

63. "You're mine. I don't share."

64. "If we get caught I'm blaming you."

65. "Stop biting that fucking lip! You know that drives me wild!"

66. "Will you teach me how to kiss?"

67. "Leave the heels on baby, but, just the heels."

68. "Come on, give me a little show."

69. "Y- you want to do it here? Now? What about our guests?"

70. "I bet the neighbors know my name."

72. "I just want you to be happy.... and naked."

73. "You look so beautiful tied up to my bed."

74. "I was wondering how long you two were going to make out like that before you realize you weren't alone."

75. "I want to kiss every inch of your body before I fuck you."

76. "Fuck me like a starved animal or leave."

77. "I want to fulfill that fantasy you've always wanted."

78. "Can I at least shut the door before you decide to pounce on me the moment I come home."

79. "I know you said you didn't want to be late, but you look amazing, and I'm trying not to kiss you senselessly right now."

80. "Kiss me again, like you mean it."

81. "Do you think of me when you touch yourself?"

82. "Do you have dirty dreams of me often?"

83. "Stop before someone sees us!"

84. "Against the window? Are you fucking insane?!"

Fluff Prompts:

1. "Rumor has it, I make you nervous."

2. "You look so cute with your baby bump!"

3. "I'm pregnant."

4. "I want to try for a baby."

5. "You look beautiful in anything."

6. "May I have this dance?"

7. "Do you think it's possible that I... might be... pregnant?"

8. "I have so much love for you. I actually never thought I could feel like this, but you proved me wrong."

9. "Dance with me and pretend the world doesn't exist."

10. "Do you want to know the gender of our baby?"

11. "You're the most important person in my life."

12. "This is going to be the start of something magical."

13. "Thank you for making me a mommy." "Thank you for making me a daddy."

14. "Every inch of you is breathtaking."

15. "I've been excited to see you all day."

16. You're my perfect match."

17. "I'll keep you warm."

18. "Can I have a massage?"

19. "Are you my secret admirer? The one whose been sending me all those flowers and notes?"

20. "Can you pretend to be my partner for my friend's wedding? I told them I'd have a plus one."

21. "I'm in love with you." "Are you finally confessing? Because I feel the same way."

22. "Apparently all our friends have a bet going that we end up together."

23. "Has anyone told you that your eyes sparkle in the moonlight?"

24. "You give my butterflies."

25. "Wait! Baby, my lip gloss is all over your lips."

26. "Would it be alright if I borrowed your sweater? It smells like you."

27. "You're always on my mind."

28. "Why are you crying?"

29. "Who hurt you?"

30. "You make me feel alive."

31. "I wouldn't change a thing about you."

32. "Can I play with your hair?"

33. "You look better in my clothes than I do."

34. "My mother adores you."

Funny/Silly Prompts for Smut or Fluff:

1. "You're seriously like a man-child."

2. "Not sure if you could tell but, I'm not exactly a people person."

3. "Just remember if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English."

4. "Stop hogging all the blankets!"

5. "I can't believe you don't like Disney movies."

6. "I'm too sober for this."

7. "Define normal."

8. "Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?"

9. "I love you. You enormously stubborn pain in the ass."

10. "I'm listening to you. I'm just not paying attention."

11. "This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you."

12. "Somebody's cranky." "Somebody needs to shut up."

13. "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn."

14. "All due respect but, that's a bunch of crap."

15. "If I see something I haven't seen before, I'll throw a dollar at it."

16. "What did I tell you about calling him/her the devil?" "That's offense to the devil?"

17. "You didn't get in trouble for lying. You got in trouble for lying badly."

18. "If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur."

19. "Sarcasm is the body's natural reaction to stupidity."

20. "Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably."

21. "You're insane, but you might also be brilliant."

22. "What you call insanity, I call inspiration."

23. "Why does everyone assume the worst of me?" "It saves time."

24. "Neither one of us is drunk enough to have this conversation."

25. "Are you questioning my methods?" "I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid."

26. "Wow, somebody needs a happy meal."

27. "I didn't do it!" "Then why are you laughing?!" "Because whoever did it is a fucking genius!"

28. "Idiots. I'm surrounded by idiots."

29. "Obviously you have mistaken me for somebody who gives a shit."

30. "It's called thinking, you should try it sometime."

31. "I'm just going to pack up now and go straight to hell."

32. "My ex? Yeah I'd still hit that. Except this time with a car or a baseball bat."

33. "Oh honey, I would but.... I don't want to."

34. "I don't need anger management! I need people to stop pissing me off!"

35. "I didn't steal it, I permanently borrowed it."

36. "You know I hear you talking, but I still don't have my coffee."

37. "Are you drunk?" "Not nearly enough."

38. "At this point, if a clown invited me into the woods, I would just go."

39. "You really don't know how to talk to woman, do you?"

40. "I'm not sure how many coffees it takes to be happy, but so far, it's not twelve."

41. "Stop texting me such weird stuff in the middle of the night."

42. "We are going to need a fantastic lawyer and a miracle."

43. "I found this porn folder on your laptop- I had no idea you had those kinks."

44. "You'll never guess how many fucking Oreos I've eaten today."

45. "We're not dating, it's barely anything, we just go on dates and make out and have sex and we recently got engaged, but it's nothing too serious."

46. "Are you drunk, stoned, or just stupid?"

47. "I should write a how-to manual, and make you the examples of 'what not to do.'

48. "Once again, I've been lured away by the promise of chocolate."

49. "If this was a romantic comedy, we would have kissed by now."

50. "You stole my seat! You're a seat-thief!"

51. "Correct my grammar all you want but, you're still a dork."

52. "We could always crash the party."

53. "Just hurry your ass up so we can get out of Kooklandia already!"

54. "Dear diary, a chipmunk asked me my name today. I told him it was Joe, that lie will haunt me forever."

55. "I always notice a woman's neck, I'm a neck person."

56. "How is my wife more badass than me?"

57. "I'm not saying she's a whore! All I'm saying is she's been on more wieners than ketchup!"

58. "You're cute when your mad" "Yeah, well I'm about to get really fucking adorable."

59. "I'm not arguing, I'm simply explaining why I'm right."

Tagging some followers & people I admire below, please reblog to get the word out!

@wannabestarkeysgirl @maybankforlife @jjmaybankspermbank @gillybear17 @sugarcoatedjj @luversgirl @mrs-country-club @obx-pogue4life @luvhann @milkiane @vintageobx @rafecameronswhore @kooksfor-life @lovelyjj @samxslaughter

[bobasheebaby]

Grey’s Anatomy Prompts

I’m going a tad stir crazy, so I decided to make a prompt list of 80 Grey’s quotes I love. This may have been done before but I don’t care. It’s mostly angsty prompts and it’s long as hell. (Break at 15)

1 “When I met you, I thought I had found the person that I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I was done. So all the boys, and all the bars, and all the obvious daddy issues, who cared? Because I was done. You left me. You chose Addison. I’m all glued back together now. I make no apologies for how I chose to repair what you broke.” —Meredith Grey

2 “Don’t let what he wants eclipse what you need. He’s very dreamy, but he is not the sun—you are.” —Cristina Yang

3 “Your choice, it’s simple: her or me? And I’m sure she’s really great. But I love you. In a really, really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me, choose me, love me.” —Meredith Grey

4 “If you love someone, you tell them. Even if you’re scared that it’s not the right thing. Even if you’re scared that it’ll cause problems. Even if you’re scared that it will burn your life to the ground, you say it, and you say it loud and you go from there.” —Mark Sloan

5 “It always feels like there is just one person in this world to love. And then you find somebody else, and it just seems crazy that you were ever worried in the first place.” —Lexie Grey

6 “Don’t let fear keep you quiet. You have a voice, so use it. Speak up. Raise your hands. Shout your answers. Make yourself heard. Whatever it takes, just find your voice, and when you do, fill the damn silence.” —Meredith Grey

7 “Not everyone has to be happy all the time. That isn’t metal health. That’s crap.” —Meredith Grey

8 “Breakthroughs don’t happen because of the medicine. Real breakthroughs happen because someone is scared to death to stop trying.” —Derek Shepherd

9 “We don’t get unlimited chances to have the things that we want, and this I know. Nothing is worse than missing an opportunity that could have changed your life.” —Addison Montgomery

10 “And if you can't do it, if you aren't willing to keep looking for light in the darkest of places without stopping, even when it seems impossible, you will never succeed.” —Amelia Shepard

11 “Oh screw beautiful! I’m brilliant! If you want to appease me, compliment my brain.” — Christina Yang

12 “You were like coming up for fresh air. It's like I was drowning and you saved me.” — Derek Shepard

13 “The only time I don't feel like a ghost is when you look at me, because when you look at me, you see me. You see me. This is me.” — Owen Hunt

14 “It's good to be scared. It means you still have something to lose.” — Richard Webber

15 “You are my person. You will always be my person.” — Christina Yang

16 “It doesn't matter how tough we are. Trauma always leaves a scar. It follows us home, it changes our lives. Trauma messes everybody up. But maybe that's the point. All the pain and the fear and the crap. Maybe going through all that is what keeps us moving forward. It's what pushes us. Maybe we have to get a little messed up, before we can step up.” — Alex Karev

17 “Please, don't chase me anymore, unless you're ready to catch me.” — Callie Torres

18 “Change … we don’t like it, we fear it. But we can’t stop it from coming. We either adapt to change, or we get left behind. It hurts to grow. Anybody who tells you it doesn’t, is lying. But here’s the truth: Sometimes, the more things change, the more they stay the same. And sometimes, oh, sometimes, change is good. Sometimes, change is … everything.” — Meredith Grey

19 “Intimacy is a four letter syllable for- here’s my heart and soul, please grind them into a hamburger and enjoy. It’s both desired and feared. Difficult to live with, impossible to live without” -Meredith Grey

20 “You can have the worst crap in the world happen to you and you can get over it. All you gotta do is survive.” -Alex Karev

21 Walk tall. All you can do is be brave enough to get out there. You fought. You loved. You Lost. Walk tall.” -Mark Sloan

22 "Just because people do horrible things, it doesn't always mean they're horrible people."-Izzie Stevens

23 "I am woman. Hear me roar." - Miranda Bailey

24 "I love everything about you. Even the things I don't like, I love. And I want you with me. I love you and I think you love me too. Do you?" -Jackson Avery

25 “If you want crappy things to stop happening to you, stop accepting crap and demand something more.” -Cristina Yang

26 “You didn't love her! You just didn't want to be alone. Or maybe, maybe she was good for your ego. Or, or maybe she made you feel better about your miserable life, but you didn't love her, because you don't destroy the person that you love!” - Callie Torres

27 I am not an ugly duckling. I'm a swan."-April Kepner

28 “Okay, here it is, your choice... it's simple, her or me, and I'm sure she is really great. But Derek, I love you, in a really, really big 'pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window', unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me, choose me, love me.” - Meredith Grey

29 “I’ve had to give up things but what I’ve learned is that I don’t need much. I don’t need much to be happy.” -Arizona Robbins

30 “I need the day off. For drinking.” -Addison Montgomery

31 "It turns out sometimes you have to do the wrong thing. Sometimes you have to make a big mistake to figure out how to make things right. Mistakes are painful, but they're the only way to find out who we really are." -Denny Duquette

32 “In the beginning everyone is there, but then they forget.” - Amelia Shepherd

33 "Knowing is better than wondering. Waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beats the hell out of never trying." -Meredith Grey

34 “You have to go back to the beginning to understand the end.” -Teddy Altman

35 “Yeah we’re friends…I mean right now I’d probably say you’re one of my best friends.”-George O’Malley

36 “I’m just gonna feel bad that I made it so you can never love again” -Jo Wilson

37 "The future is the home of our deepest fears and our wildest hopes." -Owen Hunt

38 “There’s a land called passive agressiva, and you’re their queen” -Derek Shepherd

39 “Let’s play a game of whose life sucks the most. I’ll win. I always win.” -Meredith Grey

40 “I take things personally. I get emotional.” -Lexie Grey

41 “Stop looking at my like that. Like you’ve seen me naked” -Meredith Grey

42 “Pretty good is not good enough, I want to be great.” -Cristina Yang

43 "Don't let fear keep you quiet. You have a voice so use it. Speak up. Raise your hands. Shout your answers. Make yourself heard. Whatever it takes, just find your voice, and when you do, fill the damn silence." - Meredith Grey

44 “Let’s just make-out on the couch.” -Nathan Riggs

45 "Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know; maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop." -Meredith Grey

46 “Deal with your jealousy. Deal with your shortcomings. Don’t put your crap on me.” -Stephanie Edwards

47 "I know I'm not a lot of things that you've gone for in the past - I know, but I would never leave you. I would never hurt you. And I will never stop loving you.." -George O’Malley

48 “Sometimes you have to be a shark.” -Lucy Fields

49 “Don’t look at me like that. Like I’m damaged goods. I’m still me. I’m still here.” -Adele Webber

50 "More tequila. More love. More anything. More is better." -Meredith Grey

51 "More tequila. More love. More anything. More is better." -Meredith Grey

52 "For a kiss to be really good, you want it to mean something. You want it to be with someone you can't get out of your head, so that when your lips finally touch you feel it everywhere. A kiss so hot and so deep you never want to come up for air. You can't cheat your first kiss. Trust me, you don't want to. Cause when you find that right person for a first kiss, it's everything." -Alex Karev

53 "You can't be an ass to me all day and then expect me to give you respect." - Lexie Grey

54 “Some days, the whole world seems upside down. And then somehow, and probably, when you least expect it, the world gets right again.” -Meredith Grey

55 “Shut up. Dance it out.” -Cristina Yang

56 “We may only be together five minutes every two months, but when we do we will savor every second. We know how valuable those five minutes are.” -Ben Warren

57 “There comes a point when you have to suck it up and stop whining and start living” -Callie Torres

58 “Please don’t give up on me. Promise. Promise me you won’t.” -Arizona Robbins

59 “Bad things happen, but you have to move past it. Leave it behind. The sooner, the better. Or it’ll eat away at you and stop you from moving forward.” -Miranda Bailey

60 “This is the way the world changes. Good people, raising babies right” -Catherine Avery

61 “The problem is we are human. We want more than to just survive. We want to love.” -Lexie Grey

62 "There's a club. The Dead Dads/Moms/Parents Club. And you can't be in it until you're in it. You can try to understand, you can sympathize. But until you feel that loss... My dad/mom/parent’s died when I was AGE. NAME, I'm really sorry you had to join the club." -Cristina Yang

63 “I’m going to die because these people aren’t properly trained” -Derek Shepherd

64 “I believe if you were dead, the world would be a better place” -George O’Malley

65 “You think you broke me, NAME? You’re the one who put me back together.” -Mark Sloan

66 “I want so much for you. For both of us. So much more than this. More than being stuck with someone who feels stuck. I want you to feel free.” -Callie Torres

67 “Every kiss before the right kiss doesn’t count anyway” -Derek Shepherd

68 “The expected is what keeps us steady. It’s the unexpected that changes our lives forever.” -Meredith Grey

69 “Promise that you’ll love me, even when you hate me.” -Meredith Grey

70 "The problem is, fairytales don't come true. It's the nightmares that always seem to become the reality." -Meredith Grey

71 “How are you fine? How are you just completely fine? I am ruined, okay? I am dead, I am wrecked." -Cristina Yang

72 “I didn’t like teenage girls when I was a teenage girl.” -Cristina Yang

73 “So you fight. Until you can’t fight anymore.” -Amelia Shepherd

74 “Don’t analyze everything. Just do it.” -Alex Karev

75 “Some lies aren’t lies. They’re love.” -Meredith Grey

76 “That’s where love exists, in delusional fantasies.” -Meredith Grey

77 "Friends are the family we choose." -Meredith Grey

78 "Don't ever date a man who can't handle your power." - Meredith Grey

79 "It’s not hard. It’s painful but it’s not hard. You know what to do already. If you didn’t you wouldn’t be in this much pain." —Miranda Bailey

80 “You’re my heaven. But maybe ... maybe I’m your hell.” — Denny Dequette

[god-save-the-keen]

Last but not least important, Monica Geller!

1. "And remember, if I'm harsh with you it's only because you're doing it wrong."

2. "Hey, check me out. I'm a slut!"

3. "I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world. He's not you."

4. "Welcome to the real world. It's sucks but you are gonna love it."

5. "Not just clean. Name clean."

6. "Why am I only attracted to guys where there's no future?"

7. "We're supposed to start fun in 15 minutes."

8. "You don't tell me what to do, I tell you what to do!"

9. "You were my first kiss ever?!"

10. "Seven... Seven... Seven, seven, seven, seven, seven, seven!" *🖐️✌️*

11. "Get out and stop annoying me."

12. "I really think I might kill someone tonight."

13. "That's how it started. 'I don't need to eat the cake, I just smell the icing.'"

14. "It didn't mean anything to me! I was thinking of you the whole time!"

15. "She/he wants me to move to London." "But you live here." *Person A staring her/him* "You know that."

16. "Hey, don't laugh at him/her! She/he's my drowning moron!"

17. "Go tell him/her he/she's cute. What's the worst that could happen?" "He/she could hear me."

18. "I've got this uncontrollable need to please people."

19. "I don't think I could do it again. Because getting over you it's the hardest thing I ever had to do."

20. "Do you ever, uh, like think about the future?"

21. "Has anybody seen my left boob?"

22. "I think I could show this cake a good time."

23. "No, you've messed it up. You're stupid."

24. "Do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someone that you love them and not have them say it back?"

25. "Congratulations. I think you've found the world's thinnest argument."

26. " I know you all hate me, and I'm sorry, but I don't care."

27. "We should let them win the next game." "I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said."

28. "Ok, you're being weird. Do you want sex or do you do something bad?"

29. "It's okay, You don't have to be the best at everything." "Oh my god! You don't know me at all!"

30. "So, when do we get to meet the guy?" "Let's see, today's Monday... Never."

31. "That's not even a word!!"

32. "You wanted to be a surprise." *Candles and romantic ambience*

33. "All my life, I never thought I would be so lucky as to fall in love with my best friend."

34. "The secret ingredient is... You know what? We just met."

35. "You're really good kisser."

36. "Why don't we use our wedding china today?" "No, I think we should save our china for something really special. Like if the Queen of England come over."

37. "I'll never be a bride again. Now I'm just someone wife." *Annoyed*

38. "Heh, Name, relax. It's not a contest. Certainly not a close one."

39. "Hey, Name, look. I'm melting butter." "That's great, Name. You now have the cooking skills of a hot day."

40. "Hello people who don't live here."

41. "I haven't made so many cookies since 9th grade." "What for, a bake sale?" "No, just a Friday night."

42. "You kissed another woman/man?!"

43. "Here's the last of your boxes. I'm just going to label it 'What were you thinking?'"

44. "Why don't you stop worrying about sounding smart and just be yourself?"

45. "Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!"

46. *And now, here we are, with our future before us—and I only want to spend it with you, my prince, my soul mate, my friend."

47. "I'm not someone who goes after a guy five minutes after he's divorced." "No, you go after them five minutes before they get married."

48. "I can't believe my dad saw us having sex. He didn't make it to one of my piano recitals, but this he sees."

49. "I don't believe in soulmates, either" "You don't?" "No. I don't think that you and I were destinated to end up together. I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship."

50. "You know what I'd really like to say? I'm drunk!"

Shared it, make a request, have fun! 💕

[everyones-favorite-fruit]

I posted 52 times in 2021

17 posts created (33%)

35 posts reblogged (67%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 2.1 posts.

I added 25 tags in 2021

#non binary - 5 posts

#lgbtq - 3 posts

#university - 3 posts

#lmao - 2 posts

#she/they - 2 posts

#science - 2 posts

#cats - 2 posts

#covid - 2 posts

#bisexual - 2 posts

#art - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 91 characters

#i am currently reading red dragon and this scene from the tv series wouldn't leave my head.

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

I never understood the term "gender envy" i kept reading on here until a few days ago. Now that I'm

Experiencing

It, i can say "thx, i hate it."

7 notes • Posted 2021-02-23 16:38:26 GMT

#4

Just finished the third season of The Magicians and.

Holy shit.

That whole monster affair gave me the chills and i was kinda disappointed when it turned out to be this random dude. Then that bitch switched bodies and i thought "okay whelp, it's gonna go after their ass, seeing as Eliot tried to kill it"

What i didn't expect, however, was for that thing to posses Eliot.

I've seen one (1) scene of The Monster in his body and I am so unsettled. I hate it. That's almost as bad as watching a horror movie.

8 notes • Posted 2021-03-01 21:03:45 GMT

#3

Okay, so there's this weird lil thing that I'm doing sometimes and I don't know what to make of it.

I'm non-binary and i recently started to explore that more (with how i present myself, mostly clothing wise). But here's the thing:

Since i lived close to 20 years not even considering that I'm not female, i have only female clothes obviously and most of them look very feminine. On most days i rotate between like 3 or 4 outfits atm because these are the only ones I'm really comfortable with.

BUT some days i really, really, really want to put on some of my old clothes cause they ARE pretty and i want to present feminine. I really want to, right until i see myself in the mirror and it's like a stranger staring back at me. I look like a puzzle with the pieces jammed together by force even tho they clearly don't fit.

The thing about that, which is occupying my thoughts is the following:

Do I really want to present feminine OR do i want to because that's what I'm used to? Because it was what used to feel safe?

If anyone bothered to read this and you experience something similar or know wtf is going on, then please do feel free to comment.

9 notes • Posted 2021-07-10 09:59:51 GMT

#2

Sooo, i came out to my mum a few days ago as non binary (she already knew i am bisexual) and i wanted to draw a lil something

Here's the Bi flag in zentangle

And the non binary flag

minus the white cause i can't exactly draw with white on white paper

20 notes • Posted 2021-04-29 15:23:03 GMT

#1

45 notes • Posted 2021-01-24 16:24:54 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[snugabugabunny]

I started doing 30 days a little bit ago but I missed some days and then didn't finish because some stuff happened and also, I'm not a 24/7 regressor and I even go chunks of time without regressing and I only use my blog when I am regressed. Soooo I'm just going to answer a bunch of these in a kinda long post!

1. Yes, I sleep with many stuffies actually! I have so many and I put them around me often. I recently got a Mickey and I love his texture!

2. I don't have a cg. I have a lot of chronic health problems so I live at home with my bio mom (who knows I openly enjoy childlike things, but not specifically that I regress). Because I rarely go out, and rarely interact with others even online, I haven't ever had a caregiver. A few years ago a considered asking my (now ex)bf how he felt about it but when I sort of tested the waters about his thoughts on regressors it... didn't go well so I never brought it up again. Also my bio mom does help me with some things, but she does that because of my health issues and not because I'm smol.

3. Aquarium! I like the museum and the zoo a lot too, and also just going to the mall, or target! But the aquarium is my favorite and I miss it!!

4. I don't use a paci, for a few reasons but mostly I don't tend to regress that young. I do have chewelry though! I use that when I'm big also.

5. Blue! I also like red! And green! And sometimes purple!

6. Stuffies! I love blankies too and have a handful of baby blankets, mostly because I am Very sensitive to textures and hate certain ones, but I like a lot of baby ones. I have so many stuffies though. I've loved them all my life and I still buy new ones when I find ones I love.

7. Fall! But I do like spring for how sunny it is, even if I normally stay inside.

8. I like watching movies/YouTube/TV and sometimes playing games (switch, board games, in phone games). I used to really like to color but one of my health problems affects my hands and I usually can't color very much.

9. Coloring better than drawing! When big, I'm kind of an artist, and so it's still hard for that part of my brain to turn off when little. Coloring doesn't matter how it looks but I can be perfectionist about my drawings.

10. It changes! I love love love Little Mermaid! Also Aladdin! And Lion King! When Tangled came out I watched it every day for months. Same with Moana.

11. Donald! At least out of the main crew. I also love Mickey and Goofy. I've always loved Eeyore. And Sully. And Tigger!

12. Probably Ariel + Eric, I love both! I like Belle and Beast too.

13. Octonauts is a top fave. I watch a lot of YouTube and less TV shows though.

14. I really like Fred Jones from Scooby Doo

15. Yes, I have a dog! He's a big white husky and I call him "silly butt" so often he responds to that just as much as his actual name.

16. I've always really loved dragons so probably one of those!

17. Tigers or Sharks!

18. I have many. It depends on the day to which one I snuggle or bring with me around the house. Most of them are baby blankets, one is a star wars blankie, and some are Cloak brand blankets (they're so big and usually silky-soft)

19. Lavender is one of my favorite smells! I also have a pain relief blend with lavender, peppermint, wintergreen, and more that I love! I also just got some candles and oils from Magic Candle Company and their Jungle Cruise scent (I think it's call Jungle Boat) is one of my new favorite smells!

20. I think it was Spiderman! And iron fist! It was a few months ago during a better day

21. Crayons! Sometimes markers and colored pencils!

22. I'm an Aries! But my moon is cancer and rising is aquarius which are both water signs! Which makes me a weird Aries sometimes!

23. Disney stores!!! It's like a little piece of magic! I live pretty far from either park (though Disneyland is my park) and it's nice to visit something like that without having to have a lot of money and travel. But sadly the one that's near me closed as part of a lot of closures Disney did. Now the closest one is at least an hour drive away and I don't like that mall as much. Also I do like build a bear but they don't always have things I actually want, especially cuz each store has different critters. I got Nala the last time I was in a Disney store.

24. Fave games... Hm well I'm deeply attached to Kingdom Hearts (even if I haven't finished the 3rd game). I really love the Dark Pictures Anthology games! They are spooky and werid but I am sometimes a spooky baby.

25. I really love fruit! Applesauce and fruit leathers are easiest for me to get myself, but sometimes my mom will help me with a clementine or cutting up an apple. Sometimes I have pudding, or dry cereal.

26. Juice! All different kinds!

27. Chocolate!!! I had ding-dongs for breakfast the other day when I was regressed early.

28. Lots of stuff and weirdly at the same time very few things. I have some pretty bad social anxiety, and also generalized anxiety. And yet there aren't as many specific things I fear. I really don't like creepy crawlies (spiders and most bugs) but I can deal with them, and when I'm outside I just leave them alone! I'm usually very paranoid about sounds and stuff but that fades when I'm regressed.

29. I'm really bad at finding something "unique" to talk about! I don't feel like I have any random of cool skills. I am also limited by my chronic health conditions and so I don't have exciting or relatable things to talk about very much... How about... I am super nerdy! I have a bunch of fixations that cycle around and they are all like, TV shows or movies or books or genres or games. Ummmm also I just bought my second official Mermaid tailskin. I have a mermaid tail my friends and I made a long time ago, but last year I finally got a monofin and actual professionally made tail! And I just got another tail to go over the same monofin. I don't have anywhere to regularly swim near me :( but I still really wanted a more bright/colorful tail than my first one!

30. This is gonna come off as odd maybe but being in a lot of pain can put me in little space. My chronic pain can fluctuate and sometimes when it's really bad or multiple of my issues are bad at once I involuntarily regress. It helps me stress out less and deal with my pain in a more simple way. And that it's okay if I need to cry. And it helps me get distracted by simple stuff and stop focusing on my pain level.

Thanks for getting to know me if you read this stupid long post! Also thanks if you just liked it because there's a picture of mickey and my dog!

[bobasheebaby]

91 Lucifer prompts

Some of my favorite quotes from my favorite devil. (Cut at 15 cause it’s long.)

Lucifer Morningstar

1 “People don’t arrive broken. They start with passion and yearning until something comes along that disabuses them of those notions.”

2 “People don’t have power over us. We give it to them.” 

3 “The best thing to do is always to follow your greatest desire.”

4 “Sometimes we are what we are, and we should embrace that.”

5 “Desire shouldn’t be contained, it’s unnatural.” 

6 “Why do humans think they can rectify one evil with another?”

7 “Life’s too short to hold grudges.”

8 “Believe me, there is no winning when you play by a twisted tyrant’s rules.” 

9 “You shouldn’t have to change for anyone. And neither should I.” 

10 “I refuse to be a scapegoat for which something I bear no responsibility. It’s a theme in my life.”

11 “Trust me, I’ve been doing this a long time. I know evil.”

12 “If you desire something, just take it.”

13 “Trust me, if there’s one thing I know, it’s desire.”

14 “What I hate more than anything is a liar, a charlatan, someone who doesn’t believe in what they say.”

15 “Hell truly hath no fury like a man/woman scorned.”

16 “No one gives us the right… we take it.”

17 “Mmm, dangerous. NAME likes.”

18 “There was immediate danger. He/she was about to leave this man/woman completely unsatisfied.”

19 “When in doubt, go with the classics. That’s what I always say.”

20 “Guilt is such a useless emotion”

21 “Take a swing and I’ll shove that so far up your ass, you’ll have splinters in your stool.”

22 “What makes us vulnerable is often right under our noses.”

23 “Now tell me, what is it that you truly desire?”

24 “Well, maybe it’s like butt stuff. Easier the second time around.”

25 “It’s always the ones you least suspect, the ones you trust the most, that hurt you. They wait until your guard is down and then wham! In my case, it was tequila.”

Chloe Decker

26 “It’s better to move forward than stay stuck in the past.” 

27 “We can’t control what happens to us only how it affects us and the choices we make.”

28 “You have to stop taking responsibility for things that you can’t control.” 

29 “Sometimes we get along best with the people we’re most different from.”

30 “Pull yourself together. You look like a homeless magician!”

31 “It’s really not a good day for… your… NAMEness”

32 “You don’t save a marriage by sleeping with other people.”

33 “If you go looking for loopholes, you’ll always find them.”

34 “NAME’s not another guy/gal. He’s/She’s a weirdo.”

35 “As any parent knows, the best time to get things done is when everyone else is asleep.”

36 “I wasn't afraid of you.”

37 “I don't want you to see me like this. I know it scares you.” “No, that's... that's what I was trying to tell you. I'm not... I'm not afraid of you anymore.” “You're not?” “You see, this is what I'm talking about. It's so sweet. I'm going to puke.”

38 “I miss him/her. I mean, he/she pisses me off all the time. And there are so many things about him/her that ... that I find hard to accept, but I just have to believe I can find a way. Because ... I'd rather have him/her in my life than not.” “Well, then... I think you know what you need to do.”

39 “You're different than me. You're stronger. You could have run, but you didn't. Why didn't you?”

40 “It's not like you haven't always told me the truth. You know? So ... I think, deep down, I just ... I always knew.”

41 “Let's pretend for one second that you're someone else. Someone nice, someone mature.” “Ooh, I love role-play.”

42 “What, you're just gonna leave me here? In this part of town?” “You said you wanted danger.”

43 “Please tell me I'm hallucinating.” “Well, I am dreamy, but try to contain yourself.”

44 “You step out of line one time …” “You can give me a right-good spanking, I promise.”

45 “This cannot be true. Can it? I mean ... if you knew this, why wouldn't you say something? I mean, I almost married him/her. I mean, I almost married him/her.” “I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen.”

46 “Oh, my God. Did the world just turn upside down? Did you just admit to being wrong?”

47 “You know, it can be scary sometimes, but ... being who you really are is never a bad idea.”

48 “I need you to stay here and watch your dad/mom.” “That's true. Without the two of us, he’s/she's defenseless.” “I don't know if I like what you're whispering about.”

49 “How long have I been out?” “Three years.” “What?!” [NAME starts laughing] “You’re such an ass.”

50 “I couldn't sleep last night, so I stayed up all night working, and, you know, I drank a lot of caffeine. Like, a lot.”

Mazikeen Smith

51 “If you go by someone else’s pace, it shows how much you really care.”

52 “Sometimes you have to accept when someone doesn’t feel the same way about you.” 

53 “Self-worth comes from within, bitches.” 

54 “I would never ask you to change. I like who you are.” 

55 “Hey! No one calls my skank a skank.” 

56 “Good. It's settled. Now, where do I put my knives.”

57 “Okay. One, I like to fight when I'm happy or ... horny. And, two, I really don't want to accidentally kill my best friend.”

58 “Maybe next time, I won't be around to save your ass.” “Mm! Well, that is a shame. 'Cause you and my backside used to get on very well. My front side, as well, actually.”

59 “And your name?” “NAME.” “How do you spell that?” “Surprise me.” [Later gets coffee with "WRONG NAME" on it]

60 “Everything that happened showed me exactly why I need to go back.” “I don't understand.”

Linda Martin

61 “Emotions are hard, but that’s why they make you strong.” 

62 “Goodness isn’t a toy.”

63 “Sometimes we need to lose something to understand its value.”

64 “Sometimes it’s easier to make intimate issues about something bigger than yourself.” 

65 “I find people who are rude usually feel powerless in their own lives. Terrified of not being in control.”

66 “Look... I know I'm not dad/mom, or partner or whatever. But I ...” “No. No, you're not. Come here. You are Uncle/Auntie NAME. And you will always ... be a member of this family.”

67 “Let's talk about what you're dealing with emotionally.” “Yeah, I really don't want to.”

68 “Why is he:she able to refuse my charms? I mean, is this thing on?” [points at him/herself] “Yes, yes. Definitely on.”

69 “How's that saying go? We're all in the gutter, but some of us are looking up at the stars.”

70 “Should've seen that one coming.”

Amenadiel

71 “We need the most love when we’re being most unlovable.” 

72 “No matter how bad things get, the true test is how we choose to respond to the pain. We suffer, or inflict.”

73 “Cosmos are yummy.”

74 “If you really want to know if you’re a worthy romantic partner, ask yourself.”

75 “NAME. What are you doing here? Did you hurt NAME?” “Only when he/she asked me nicely.”

Ella Lopez

76 “Whenever I’m procrastinating on something, I make an appointment for myself to do it. That way, can’t back out.”

77 “You see what I'm dealing with?”

78 “Hey. No one insults my family, except for me.”

79 [high on "candy"] “I know I should be freaking out right now, but your hair is so shiny.”

80 I'm usually not into reality shows either. I prefer more, you know, scripted-content, documentaries, but... I've got a little extra time these days, so... sort of kind of watched, uh, 27 seasons in two weeks.

Dan Espinoza 

81 “We all need someone to have our backs every now and then.”

82 “Ooh, lemon bars. My favorite. Mmm. Oh, man, these are amazing. Who made 'em?” “Uh, NAME did. Would you believe that hunk bakes?” [spits out the bars] “On second thought, who needs the empty calories?”

83 “Say you fall in love with a man/woman who has a cat. What are you gonna do? You accept the cat.” 

84 “Are you sleeping with this idiot?” “He/She hasn't had the pleasure, unfortunately, no.”

85 “Dude, I cannot deal with your weirdness right now.”

Trixie Espinoza

86 “We’re wearing the same shirt!” [both] “Sushi shirt!” [from around the corner] “I don’t know what’s going on out there, but I hate it!”

87 “I ate it.” “Mm-hmm.” “But NAME said it was okay.” “Oh, really?” “He/She said, if you really want to do something, you should. And I really wanted to eat some chocolate cake.”

88 “Are you looking at a no-no site?” “No. Why would you think that?” “Because you put it away so fast, and you look really, really guilty.”

89 “NAME, sever their Achilles first. If they can't walk ...” “They can't betray you.”

90 “You need to get a thicker skin. Stand up for yourself, because the truth is, nobody’s gonna do it for you.” — Charlotte Richards

91 “Anybody worth dating should understand everything that makes you … you.” — Ev

[bobasheebaby]

100 New Girl Prompts

So many prompts, most of which are funny. Break at 15 cause it’s mega long.

1 "I'm using my bride/groom card!" — Cece

2 “Can we just take a minute to celebrate me?" — Schmidt

3 “So many emotions." — Nick

4 “I'm totaling my assets. It's really bleak." — Jess

5 “Look at those horny horny hippos.” — Nick

6 “I got mozzarella sticks for fingers." — Nick

7 “Every moment you're on this Earth is a moment I know where you are." — Nick

8 “It is my Secret Santa alias." — Winston

9 “Friend face." — Winston

10 “It's perfectly fine to watch TV all day." — Nick

11 “If I were off my rocker, would I take a weekly selfie with my cat?" — Winston

12 “I can't find my driving moccasins anywhere." — Schmidt

13 “Believe it or not, that's not the first time someone's broken my feeling stick. I have a travel size." — Jess

14 “Put on some pants, or at least some really high socks." — Jess

15 “You like me? You like my personality?" “I was surprised, too.” — Schmidt & Cece

16 "I just wanted to listen to Taylor Swift alone!" — Jess

17 “That's like the president and the vice president not being best friends." — Winston

18 “I'll take the strongest drink you have, and also a wine spritzer on the side in case I don't like it." — Jess

19 “You have the right...to remain hugged." — Coach

20 “If you are for one second suggesting that I don't know how to open a musical, how dare you!" — Schmidt

21 “I was sabotaged by my baby box." — Jess

22 “We are literally the most embarrassing people on the planet." — Jess

23 "It's a weird life, but it's where I'm at right now." — Nick

24 "You gave me a cookie, I gave you a cookie." — Nick

25 “Go put a dollar in the jar right now." — Coach

26 “This is my jam." — Coach

27 “Saturday is a day for sleeping, and damn it, you will not take that away from me!" — Winston

28 “Are we eating or are we not eating?" — Winston

29 "Eating cookies and avoiding confrontation." — Jess

30 “Because it's a great story, and I'm a teller of stories." — Nick

31 “I like being weird." — Jess

32 "This is the worst thing to ever happen to me. I've lived a very fortunate life!" — Jess

33 "I don't like it. It's too much responsibility." — Nick

34 “Are you cooking a frittata in a sauce pan? What is this – prison?” — Schmidt

35 “I hate your mustache because I miss your upper lip.” — Schmidt

36 “He’s/She's got that giant heart that's part compass and part flashlight and he’s/she's just the greatest person I have ever met.” — Nick

37 “Who's that guy/girl? It's NAME." — Jess

38 “Watch your front because we've got your back!” — Cece

39 “Picking lint off of a man's/woman’s sleeve is the most intimate gesture.” — Cece

40 “Blast from the past, how's that ass?” — Jess

41 “I hate this. I just wanna sit around and do nothing, but that is not hot.” “That's hot to me. You add some sweatpants to that and that is better than porn.” — Kai & Nick

42 “Look at that font! What is this? Amateur hour? At least use Palatino.” — Nick

43 “I’m like a sexual snowflake. Each night with me is like a unique experience.” — Schmidt

44 “Where have you been? I am having a major life crisis, and you guys are, what, just driving around, French kissing each other like a couple of Dutch hookers?” — Schmidt

45 “No sig oths.” “Just say ‘significant others.” “Maybe you have that kind of time, but I’m on a tight sched.” — Schmidt & Cece

46 “I know this isn’t gonna end well, but the whole middle part is going to be awesome.” — Nick

47 “NAME, you’ve been staring at this guy/girl for 5 minutes. Please tell me you’re checking him/her out, otherwise you’re a serial killer. Which would explain a lot.” — Schmidt

48 “This is a horrible neighborhood. There are youths everywhere!” — Schmidt

49 “Guess whose personalized condoms just arrived!” — Schmidt

50 “I’m really gonna need you to step it up tonight, okay? When I see you, I wanna be thinking, ‘Who let the dirty slut out of the slut house?’” — Schmidt

51 “Can someone please get my towel? It’s in my room next to my Irish walking cape!” — Schmidt

52 “Have you seen my sharkskin laptop sleeve?” — Schmidt

53 “Don’t pretend to know my pain.” — Schmidt

54 “Do I regret it? Yes. Would I do it again? Probably.” — Nick

55 “I don't know what I'm doing emotionally or -- let's be honest -- sexually.” — Jess

56 “What if I have some idea of love in my head and it’s just totally wrong?” — Jess

57 “Life sucks. And then it gets better. And then it sucks again.” — Nick

58 “I like getting older, I feel like I’m aging into my personality.” — Nick

59 “You know, sometimes I feel like I’ve never really felt love.” — Winston

60 “When you care about somebody you do what's best for them even if it sucks for you.” — Schmidt

61 “Old people freak me out. With their hands and their legs. They’re like the people version of pleated pants.” — Schmidt

62 “I’m gonna have to run all the way home, and I have my slipperiest loafers on.” — Schmidt

63 “Downstairs neighbour put a password on their wi-fi.” — Nick

64 “You were denied a cell phone because you have the credit score of a homeless ghost.” — Schmidt

65 “I’m only attracted to guys/girls who are afraid of success and think someone famous stole their idea.” — Jess

66 “This place is fancy and I don’t know which fork to kill myself with.” — Nick

67 “Without sex, he’s/she’s not your boyfriend/girlfriend. Okay? He’s/She’s a friend you buy meals for.” — Schmidt

68 “I feel like I wanna murder someone. And also, I want soft pretzels.” — Jess

69 “So when I do the chicken dance, I do it a little differently. Instead of doing claps, I like to do a peck. It’s more realistic.” — Jess

70 “NAME doesn’t have a life plan. He/She doesn’t have a day plan. I once found a note that he/she wrote to himself that said, ‘Put on pants.'” — Jess

71 “I don’t want to kiss and tell, but I ruined my dresser during intercourse. Will you go to Ikea with me?” — Jess

72 “Can I get an alcohol?” — Nick

73 “I want to kill you, because I respect you. NAME! I think I understand hunting!” — Nick

74 “Look, we’re not trying to be mean. We just don’t want you to be yourself… in any way.”

75 “I have decided to give up on men/women and put all of that energy into tomatoes.”

76 “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? No, a summer’s day is not a bitch!” — Nick

77 “I only wanna make a drink a coal miner would want. Straight forward. Honest. Something that says, ‘I work in a hole.'” — Nick

78 “I’m not convinced I know how to read, I’ve just memorized a lot of words.” — Nick

79 “I like chipmunks more than squirrels.” — Nick

80 “I can’t believe I’m the sober one. That’s actually never happened before in my life.” — Nick

81 “Beans are nothing but soggy nuts.” — Schmidt

82 “Can I interest you in some white noise?” — Winston

83 “Those are pickles in progress.” — Winston

84 “Who’s talking to you, Depression-era garbage man?” — Coach

85 “I need everyone to shut up.” — Coach

86 “Your asses belong to me now.” — Coach

87 “That’s what’s up, that’s what’s up. No doubt. Diggity.” — Coach

88 “I hate when Schmidt cries. He sounds like a ghost singing ‘Hey Ya.'” — Coach

89 “I’ve made out with half of the guys/girls in this room.” — Cece

90 “You always see the worst in people.” “Yeah, because people are the worst.” — Jess & Nick

91 “I’m sorry we’re not going this weekend.” “But It’s free.” “Did you say free?” “Yeah.” “We’re 100% in. I’ll go pack now.” — Nick & Jes

92 “I’m going to end up alone. I’m going to be a single old man/lady flashing people on the subway.” — Jess

93 “I’ve got two perfectly good forks on the end of my arms.” — Nick

94 “If we needed to talk about feelings they would be called talkings.” — Nick

95 “When you question my pajamas, you make me question our entire friendship!” — Jess

96 “Why can’t I have the things that I want?!” — Schmidt

97 “Bathtubs are medieval filth cauldrons.” — Schmidt

98 “They don’t hate me because I’m old. They hate me because of my personality.” — Schmidt

99 “It’s like you’re ripping the side block out of my mental Jenga.” — Schmidt

100 “I’m not actually quite sure how to stop this.” — Schmidt

[bobasheebaby]

60 Spongebob Squarepants Prompts

This is a very special request for @burnsoslow boys. And now is time for me to admit that I hate this show so I hope I did a good job picking quotes. But really some are funny.

1 “Now that we’re men, we have facial hair.” “Now that we’re men I changed my underwear.” — Spongebob and Patrick

2 “What does claustrophobic mean?” “It means he’s afraid of Santa Clause.” — Spongebob and Patrick

3 “You don’t need a license to drive a sandwich.” — Spongebob

4 “Are you NAME now? … That’s okay take your time.” — Patrick Star

5 “I’ll have you know that I stubbed by toe last week and only cried for 20 minutes.” — Spongebob

6 “NAME, you’re a genius!” “Yeah, I get called that a lot.” “What? A genius?” “No, NAME.” — Spongebob Squarepants and Patrick Star

7 “Firmly grasp it in your hand.” — Patrick Star

8 “guess what day today is?” “Annoy NAME day?” “no silly! thats on the 15!” — Spongebob and Patrick

9 “Dumb people are always blissfully unaware of how dumb they really are …” [drools] —Patrick Star

10 “NAME, your ceiling is talking to me.” — Patrick Star

11 [with candy on his mouth] “All right! Which one of you flatfoots stole my lollypop?” [spongebob, the cops, and patrick laugh] “I mean it!” — Patrick Star

12 “Quick, NAME, without thinking: if you could have anything right now, what would it be?” “Um ... more time for thinking.” — Spongebob and Patrick

13 “What do you usually do when I’m gone” “waiting for you to come back.” — Spongebob & Patrick

14 “Well, it may be stupid, but it’s also dumb.” — Patrick

15 “Well, it’s no secret that the best thing about a secret is secretly telling someone your secret, thereby adding another secret to their secret collection of secrets, secretly.” — Spongebob

16 “NAME ... I used your clarinet to unclog my toilet!” — SpongeBob

17 [thinking] I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I definitely don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. I don’t need it. [shouts] “I… need… it!” — SpongeBob

18 “Who’s ready?” “I’m ready!” “Who’s ready?” “I’m ready!” “Who’s ready?” *I’m ready!* — Spongebob & Patrick

19 “NAME is the only guy I know who can have fun with a jellyfish … [shouting] for 12 hours!” — Squidward

20 “Now, who wants to save the world?” “I do!” “I do!” “I do!” “I don’t.” — SpongeBob SquarePants

21 [in a mattress store] “Wow, look at all these mattresses! How many do you think here are?” [looks around the store] “10.” “Cool.” — Spongebob & Patrick

22 “Are they laughing at us?” “No, NAME. They’re laughing next to us.” — Spongebob & Patrick

23 “You never really know the true value of a moment, until it becomes a memory.” — SpongeBob

24 “Oh well, I guess I’m not wearing any pants today!” — SpongeBob

25 “We’re not doing so well, NAME. We need a new approach, a new tactic.” “Umm, I got it. Let’s get naked!” — Spongebob & Patrick

26 “Knowledge cannot replace friendship. I’d rather be an idiot than lose you.” — Patrick to Spongebob

27 “Careful, NAME; Careful NAME. NAME careful. Careful NAME!” “NAME.” “Yeah?” “It’s already open.” “Oh.” — Patrick

28 “If you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime.” [locks SpongeBob and Patrick in jail cell and opens it again after a second] “Okay, time’s up. Now get out!” “But … we stole a balloon!” “Yeah, on free balloon day!” — Police & Spongebob

29 “What’s better than serving up smiles” “being dead or anything else.” — Spongebob & Squidward

30 “If I were to die right now in a fiery explosion due to carelessness of a friend ... Then it would just be alright.” — Spongebob

31 “Good people don’t rip other people’s arms off.” — Spongebob

32 “Wow, NAME, I didn’t know you spoke bird.” “No, NAME, that’s Italian.” — Spongebob & Patrick

33 “Isn’t this great NAME? It’s just the 3 of us. You, me, and this brick wall you built between us.” — SpongeBob SquarePants

34 “We shall never deny a guest even the most ridiculous request.” — Mr. Krabs

35 “That hat makes you look like a girl.” “Am I a pretty girl?!” — Mr. Krabs & SpongeBob

36 “A five letter word for happiness … money.” — Mr. Krabs

37 “NAME, I don't think Wumbo is a real word." "Come on. You know, I wumbo, you wumbo, he/she/me wumbo. Wombology, the study of wumbo! It's first grade NAME!" — Spongebob & Patrick

38 “No one can change a person, but someone can be a reason for that person to change.” – Spongebob

39 “F is for fire that burns down the whole town, U is for Uranium…bombs! N is for no survivors!" — Plankton

40 “The best time to wear a striped sweater …is all the time."

41 “Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died … the end."

42 “Can I be excused for the rest of my life?"

43 “Can I get some extra salt?" “We're all out." “Could you check?" “... No."

44 “It took three days to make that potato salad … three days!!!"

45 “You just CAN'T WAIT for me to die, can you?"

46 “Now he's gonna kick my butt!"

47 "This is not your average, everyday darkness. This is ... ADVANCED darkness."

48 “Too bad NAME isn't here to enjoy NAME not being here." — Squidward

49 “Remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets."

50 “I'm not just ready, I'm ready Freddy!" “It's NAME …"

51 “NAME, don't you have to be stupid somewhere else?" “Not until four."

52 “Who are you people?!"

53 “Are you NAME now? ... That's okay, take your time."

54 “HAHAHAHA THAT GUY GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A COCONUT HAHAHA."

55 “Too bad that didn't kill me."

56 “Bye NAME 1! Bye NAME 2! Bye NAME 1!” “You said bye to NAME 1 twice.” [grins huge, pauses, dreamily] “I liiiike NAME 1.” — Spongebob & Patrick

57 “NAME, bus is here! NAME!” [tries to run up the road] “Ahh! Ahhh! Ahhhh!” — Patrick & Spongebob

58 “If you believe in yourself and with a tiny pinch of magic, all your dreams can come true.” – Spongebob

59 “The inner machinations of my mind are an enigma.” – Patrick Star

60 “It’s not always what you say that matters, sometimes it’s what you don’t say.” – Mr. Krabs

[bobasheebaby]

100 Buffy Prompts

I had a lot of fun compiling this list. I was cracking up more than once and now I want to binge Buffy. If there is a show you want let me know because these seriously help me shut of my brain during this covid hell.

1 “NAME, your mouth is open, sound is coming from it. This is never good.” – Buffy Summers

2 “I just want to be alone and quite in a room with a chair and a fireplace and a tea cozy. I don’t even know what a tea cozy is, but I want one.” – Buffy Summers

3 "They were supposed to be my light at the end of the tunnel. I guess they were a train.” – Buffy Summers

4 “I don’t know what’s coming next. But I do know it’s gonna be just like this – hard, painful. But in the end, it’s gonna be us. If we all do our parts, believe it, we’ll be the one’s left standing.” – Buffy Summers

5 “I don’t handle rejection well. Funny, considering all the practice I’ve had, huh?” – Xander Harris

6 "Just because you’re better than us doesn’t mean you can be all superior.” – Xander Harris

7 “I’m leaning towards blind panic myself.” – Rupert Giles

8 “Since the picture you just painted means that I will never touch food of any kind again, you’ll just have to pick it up yourself.” – Rupert Giles

9 "With all the rubbish people keep sticking in my head, it's a wonder that there's room for my brain." – Spike

10 "Oh, I don't know. Looking in the mirror every day and seeing nothing there...it's an overrated pleasure.” – Angel

11 "Passion. It lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unwanted, unbidden, it will stir. Open it's jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us. Passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have?" – Angel

12 "Anyway, for real now, I'm gonna ask you something, and you gotta promise you'll be honest and not spare my feelings just 'cause I could kill you. You promise?" Faith

13 "You gotta give me something to do. There's no way I'm sleeping. Don't you need anyone dead? Or maimed? I can settle for maimed.” – Faith

14 "You know, I honestly don't think there's a human word fabulous enough for me.”- Glorificus

15 “I’m cookie dough. I’m not done baking. I’m not finished becoming whoever the hell it is I’m gonna turn out to be. I make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day, I turn around and realize I’m ready. I’m cookies. And then, you know, if I want someone to eat m — or enjoy warm, delicious, cookie me, then that’s fine. That’ll be then. When I’m done.” — Buffy Summers

16 “Seize the moment, ’cause tomorrow you might be dead.” — Buffy Summers

17 “The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live.” — Buffy Summers

18 “No weapons. No friends. No hope. Take all that away and what’s left?” “Me.” — Angelus & Buffy Summers

19 “Don’t you have an elsewhere to be?” – Cordelia Chase

20 “God! What is your childhood trauma?!” – Cordelia Chase

21 “Gee, can you vague that up for me?” – Buffy Summers

22 “I laugh in the face of danger. Then I hide until it goes away.” – Xander Harris

23 “I don’t know what your problem is, what your issues are. But as of this moment I officially don’t care.” – Xander Harris

24 “You’re really campaigning for bitch of the year, aren’t you?” – Cordelia Chase

25 “I mock you with my monkey pants!” – Oz

26 “Funny how preparing looks an awful lot like sitting on your ass.” – Spike

27 “That’s fairly freaksome.” – Oz

28 “Do you have any tact at all?” – Giles

29 “I’ve known you for two minutes and I can’t stand you.” – Spike

30 “Great. Now I’m gonna be stuck with serious thoughts all day.” – Cordelia Chase

31 “You didn’t happen to take a lot of drugs, did you?” – Willow

32 “I’ve seen honest faces…they usually come attached to liars.” – Willow

33 “Can I be blind, too?” – Xander

34 “Gee, I hope I’m not interrupting anything really depressing.” – Riley

35 “And you just accepted that? I only said that because I thought that’s what you wanted to hear.” – Anya

36 “This is the crack team that foils my every plan? I am deeply shamed.” – Spike

37 “We’ve got to face it, we’ve changed. Well, not you—you’re still sadistic and self-centered.” – Giles

38 “Sometimes the most adult thing you can do is ask for help when you need it.” – Giles

39 “Did everybody have their Crazy Flakes today?” – Xander

40 “Do you love me?” “What?” “Do you?” “I love you. I don't know if I trust you.” “Maybe you shouldn't do either.” “Maybe I'm the one who should decide!” — Angel & Buffy

41 “Six a.m.!" NAME cried. "I know that's a number on my clock, but I've never actually been awake to personally witness it!” — Xander

42 “Bored now.” — Vampire Willow

43 “We’ll go be heroes.” — Spike

44 “You have a plan?” “I am the plan.” — Giles & Buffy

45 "Strong is fighting. It's hard and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together." — Buffy

46 "I make it through this and the next thing and the next thing, and maybe one day I turn around and realize I'm ready." — Buffy

47 "You have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. NAME, the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live, for me." — Buffy

48 "Make your choices. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy

49 “Weird love’s better than no love.” — Buffy

50 “The who having wha with huh?” — Buffy

51 “Whatever you choose, you’ve got my support. Just think of me as… as your… You know, I’m searching for supportive things and I’m coming up all bras. So, something slightly more manly, think of me as that.” – Xander

52 "A lot of things that seem strong and good and powerful, they can be painful." Angel

53 "To forgive is an act of compassion, NAME. It's-it's... it's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it." — Giles

54 "In the end, we all are who we are, no matter how much we may appear to have changed." — Giles

55 "I don't have time for vendettas. The mission is what matters." — Buffy

56 "I don't want to protect you from the world. I want to show it to you." — Buffy

57 "Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?" — Buffy

58 "Recognizing power in another does not diminish your own." — Joss Whedon

59 “Out. For. A. Walk… Bitch.” — Spike

60 “You can’t see the stars, love. That’s the ceiling. Also, it’s day.” — Spike

61 “Is everyone here very stoned?” — Spike

62 “I feel safe with you.” [Chokes] “TAKE THAT BACK!” — Dawn & Spike

63 “I love you.” “Oh, my god.” “Hey, no. Look at me. I... love you. You're all I bloody think about... dream about. You're in my gut... my throat... I'm drowning in you, NAME. I'm drowning in you.” — Spike & Buffy

64 “Just... give me something. A crumb, the barest smidgen. Tell me maybe, someday there's a chance” “NAME ... the only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious.” “Oh, wha-“ [screams, then shouts]  “What the bleeding hell is wrong with you bloody men/women? What the hell does it take? Why do you bitches torture me?” “Which question do you want me to answer first?” — Spike & Buffy

65 “You can't deny it. There's something between us.” “Loathing. Disgust.” — Spike & Buffy

66 “Could do without the laugh track, NAME.” “But it's so funny. I knew... before you did. I knew you loved the NAME. The pixies in my head whispered it to me.” — Spike & Drusilla

67 “Damn right I’m impure! I’m as impure as the driven yellow snow.” — Spike

68 “I love you.” “No, you don’t. But thanks for saying it.” — Spike & Buffy

69 “This with you, it’s wrong. I know it. I’m not a complete idiot.” — Spike

70 “You always hurt the ones you love, pet.” — Spike

71 "When I say ‘I love you,’ it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are." — Buffy

72 "I’m just gonna go home, lie down, and listen to country music. The music of pain." — Buffy

73 "I have feelings for you. I do. But it's not love. I could never trust you enough for it to be love." — Buffy

74 "Weird love's better than no love." — Buffy

75 “People don’t fall in love with what’s right in front of them. People want the dream — what they can’t have. The more unattainable, the more attractive.” — Buffy

76 "Trust is for old marrieds, NAME. Great love is wild and passionate and dangerous. It burns and consumes." “Until there's nothing left. Love like that doesn't last." — Spike & Buffy

77 "This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you...you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after" — Angel

78 "I love you. I try not to, but I can't stop" — Angel

79 "If I may suggest, ‘This time it's personal.’ I mean, there's a reason why it's a classic." —Oz

80 "Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend NAME jealous, or even the score, or something. And...that's on the empty side. See, in my fantasy, when I'm kissing you, you're kissing me. It's okay, I can wait." — Oz

81 "NAME’s our friend...except I don't like him/her.” — Xander

82 "What am I gonna do? I think about sex all the time! Sex ... Help! Four times five is thirty ... five times six is thirty-two ... Naked girls. Naked women ... Naked NAME ... Oh, stop me!" — Xander

83 "Man, NAME! My whole life just flashed before my eyes. I gotta' get me a life!" — Xander

84 “NAME. You're really campaigning for bitch-of-the-year, aren't you?” “As defending champion, you nervous?” — Cordelia & Buffy

85 "Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass." — Cordelia

86 “Oh please. Like shame is something to be proud of.” — Cordelia

87 “I’m going to give you some advice: get over it.” — Cordelia

88 “Oh, and you’re welcome.” — Cordelia

89 “I’m not a sniveling little cry-NAME. I’m the nastiest guy/girl in PLACE history. I take crap from no one.” — Cordelia

90 “I think it. I say it. It’s my way.” — Cordelia

91 "I don't like spiders, okay? Their furry bodies, and their sticky webs, and what do they need all those legs for anyway? I'll tell you - for crawling across your face in the middle of the night." — Willow

92 "I don't want danger. Big 'no’ to danger.” — Willow

93 "Let's get this straight. I don't understand it. I don't wanna' understand it. You have gross emotional problems. And things are not okay between us." — Willow

94 "NAME, I got so lost." "I found you. I will always find you." — Tara & Willow

95 "But you like him/her, and when you think about him/her, you get that good down-low tickle, right?" — Faith

96 "You hurt me, I hurt you. I'm just a little more efficient." — Faith

97 "Just relax ... and take off your pants." — Faith

98 "I am, you know." “What?" “Yours." — Tara & Willow

99 "I don't have time for bondage fun." - Buffy

100 “It's fine, I don't need to be snuggled.” — Willow

[bobasheebaby]

125 How I Met Your Mother Prompts

More prompts this one is mega long but broken up by character. I think it’s a pretty good mix of funny and angsty. Break at 15.

Barney Stinson

1 “You know what NAME needs to do. He needs to stop being sad. When I get sad, I stop being sad, and be awesome instead. True story.”

2 “A lie is just a great story that someone ruined with the truth.”

3 “ It's going to be legen...wait for it...and I hope you're not lactose-intolerant cause the second half of that word is...dairy!”

4 “Suit up!”

5 “Believe it or not, I was not always as I am today.”

6 “I realized that I'm searching, searching for what I really want in life. And you know what? I have absolutely no idea what that is.”

7 “Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume, in case I strike out with the hottest boy/girl at the party. That way, I have a second chance to make a first impression.”

8 “Whatever you do in this life, it’s not legendary unless your friends are there to see it.”

9 “Three days. We wait three days to call a man/woman, because that's how long Jesus wants us to wait... True story.”

10 “There’s three rules of cheating: 1. It’s not cheating if you’re not the one who’s married. 2. It’s not cheating if his/her name has two adjacent vowels. 3. And it's not cheating if he’s/she’s from a different area code.”

11 “I peed in an alley which happened to have a church which I did not see because I was drunk.”

12 “I'm such a mess. Why do you even like me?” “I guess, because you're almost as messed up as I am.”

13 “In my body, where the shame gland should be, there is a second awesome gland. True story.”

14 “Do you have some puritanical hang up on prostitution? Dude, it’s the world’s oldest profession.”

15 “Here’s the mini-cherry on top of the regular cherry on top of the sundae of awesomeness that is my life.”

16 “God, it’s me, NAME. What up? I know we don’t talk much, but I know a lot of guys/girls call out your name because of me.”

17 “Okay, pep talk! You can do this, but to be more accurate, you probably can’t. You’re way out of practice and he’s/she’s way too hot for you. So, remember, it’s not about scoring. It’s about believing you can do it, even though you probably can’t. Go get ‘em, tiger!”

18 “De — wait for it — nied! Denied! We’re goin’ out tomorrow night.”

19 “Step six is called purg— wait for it. Keep waiting. Keep waiting for all of eternity only to discover that there’s no escape —atory.”

20 “I think tonight is going to be de — wait for it — lightful.”

21 “Ted, tonight is gonna be — wait for it — dary! Wait, no, that’s not it. How do I usually say it?”

22 “You watch, NAME, tonight is going to be legen— it’s the night we stole a camel! Which means it will be full of drama —dary.”

23 “I’m just gonna grab this star to put on top of the tree. It’s gonna be legend— wait for it —merry.”

24 “Haaaave you met NAME?”

25 “Challenge accepted!”

Robin Scherbatsky

26 “Oh, come on, ref! I haven't seen that much hooking go unpunished since my last trip to Vegas.“

27 “Just be yourself. Say something nice.” “Which one? I can't do both.”

28 “Before you know it, you'll be marrying a man/woman who once ate a vanilla-scented candle!” “That was on me. I shouldn't have left it in the kitchen. Though, it was lit. Man, he/she dumb.”

29 “Destined? Aren't you tired of waiting for destiny, NAME? Isn't it time to make your own destiny?“

30 “NAME was great.” “Exactly, and you threw it all away to chase after some hot piece of ass.” “You mean you?” “Thank you!”

31 “Oh, we're busting apple bags? I can bust apple bags.“

32 “NAME, I am not ready for them to find out about us.” “Then you're gonna have to stay in there for the entire trilogy. Don't worry, it's only 382 minutes.” “Nerd!”

33 “You know NAME? Been thinking about it. Guess it's kind of nice you're such a bad-ass.” “It's pretty bad-ass you're so nice, NAME.”

34 “14 seconds! And already some dingdong is stepping up, thinking he can get some of this broke off.”

35 “But timing is a bitch.”

36 “Well, maybe this isn't a breakup. Maybe this is two friends getting back together.“

37 “There's something between us. Maybe my head was saying, 'nip it in the bud', because my heart was saying something else ...”

38 “I just finished a seven-day cleanse.” “I thought you just started that yesterday.” “I finished early, okay?”

39 “NAME! I just had a great idea!” “Oh, do whatever you want to me, just don't wake me up.”

40 “Okay, I've missed you. Not in a 'we're gonna make out' way, not even in an 'I forgive you' way. Just in an 'I've missed you' way.”

41 “I may not love you the way you love me, but I do love you.”

42 “But ... umm.”

43 “Why am I constantly looking for reasons not to be happy?”

44 “Oh, that’s right. I’m alone.”

45 “I’m gonna give you summer teeth ... some’re here, some’re there.”

46 “You can’t run back to the past because it’s familiar.”

47 “Nobody asked you, NAME.”

48 “It’s one thing to not want something. It’s another to be told you can’t have it.”

49 "I am never going to have closure. Okay, closure doesn't exist."

50 “You are going to miss out on something great.”

Ted Mosby

51 "If you're not scared then you're not taking a chance. And if you're not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?"

52 “You can ask the universe for signs all you want but ultimately we'll only see what we want to see...when we're ready to see it.”

53 "Nothing good happens after 2:00 am… when 2:00 am rolls around, just go home and go to sleep."

54 "The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get. It’s like when your car slides on ice, you steer into the skid."

55 "Sorry, Peter. We're grown ups now, we can't fly to Nevrland with you anymore."

56 "I wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. I woke up all greasy and sweaty. My sheets looked like what they wrap deli sandwiches in. Maybe I should join a gym. Do you go to a gym?"

57 "People make fun of the guy/girl who stays home every night doing nothing, but the truth is that guy/girl is a genius.”

58 “Love doesn't make sense! You can't logic your way into or out of it. Love is totally nonsensical. But we have to keep doing it or else we're lost and love is dead, and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the best thing we do.”

59 “Everyone has an opinion on how long it takes to recover from a breakup.”

60 “There are a lot of little reasons why the big things in our lives happen.”

61 “There are two big days in any love story: the day you meet the guy/girl of your dreams and the day you marry him/her.”

62 ““I’m crazy about you. I think we should be together. What do you say?” “Yes. No. Maybe.” “Those are the three options.”

63 “The littlest thing can cause a ripple effect that changes your life.”

64 “It's kind of insane how much happened in just a day and a half.”

65 “Whether a gesture's charming or alarming, depends on how it's received.”

66 “Because sometimes even if you know how something's gonna end that doesn't mean you can't enjoy the ride.”

67 “Shouldn't we hold out for the person who doesn't just tolerate our little quirks but actually kinda likes them?”

68 “I used to be in such a hurry all the time. Everything was so urgent. Now I figured, if it's going to happen it'll happen when it happens. I'm not going anywhere, he’s/she's not going anywhere. What's the rush, right?”

69 “I think for the most part if you're really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you.”

70 “We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends, that in those rare times when we do open up, it's amazing how minor those secrets all end up being.”

71 “You may think your only choices are to swallow your anger or throw it in someone's face, but there's a third option: You can just let it go, and only when you do that is it really gone and you can move forward.”

72 “I'm sorry, when I'm excited I abbreviate words I shouldn't.”

73 “We gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.”

74 “When you believe in people, people come through.”

75 “If you love something, you can never let it go. Not even for a second. Or it's gone forever.“

76 “Hey ref! Check your voicemail, I think you've missed a few calls!“

77 “Turns out, when you projectile vomit on skates, you roll right into the spray.“

78 “NAME, if you asked a hundred people: 'Who's the worst person you could possibly date?' They'd all say 'your therapist', except the ones saying 'NAME'.”

79 “Sometimes our best decisions are the ones that don't make any sense at all.“

80 “We've always been a trio! We're right up there with Batman and Robin and Alfred. Romeo and Juliet and the apothecary. Salt and pepper and cumin.“

Lily Aldrin

81 “You guys dated before. That time counts. The clock doesn't reset to zero. It un-pauses from where you left off.”

82 “We struggle so hard to hold on to these things that we know are gonna disappear eventually. And that’s really noble.”

83 “You can’t just skip ahead to where you think your life should be.”

84 “I know it's a mistake, but there are certain things in life where you know it's a mistake but you don't really know it's a mistake because the only way to really know it's a mistake is to make the mistake and look back and say 'yep, that was a mistake.' So really, the bigger mistake would be to not make the mistake, because then you'd go your whole life not knowing if something is a mistake or not.”

85 “Yes, I'm in a rotten mood. No, I don't want to talk about it. Yes, this has booze in it. No, it's not my first.”

86 “The 'no more surprises'-thing is the best part of being married.”

87 “So, what do you want to do tonight? Drink ourselves blind, set a car on fire? Oh, watch a movie that doesn't start with a desk lamp jumping on top of a capital 'I'?”

88 “Baby, you're like 20 slutty chicks all rolled into one.” “Sweet-talk is not gonna change my mind!”

89 “So this is what you guys do? You invite other couples over for dinner, to judge them and feel superior?” “Oh, grow up, NAME, that's why any couple invites anyone over ever!”

90 “I think my soul just threw up a little bit.“

91 “Your heart's talking to you, NAME. Do you have the guts to listen to it?”

92 “I don't care if the dishes aren't done, okay? If you care, you do it.” “Great, then I don't care if you have an orgasm. If you care, you do it.”

93 “Who wants hot-wings?” “I'm in... or maybe we should just pour hot-sauce on NAME, since he's/she’s a total chicken.”

94 “I hate how you're always right.” “It's my best, and most annoying, trait.“

95 “Sex now, we'll do the foreplay after.“

96 “NAME check it! Three blond babies drinking bad-decision-juice at eight o'clock.”

97 “If you keep lying to me, if you keep cutting me out of decisions, if you keep using words like winning and losing when you talk about our marriage, you are going to lose me.”

98 “Why not just say goodbye to the bad things?”

99 “Say goodbye to all the times you felt lost, to all the times it was a no instead of a yes, to all the scrapes and bruises, to all the heartache.”

100 “Where’s the poop, NAME? Where’s the poop?”

Marshall Eriksen

101 “Hey I have given up peeing in the shower for you!”

102 “Why does he/she keep doing this? He meets them. He/She likes them way too much. He/She goes way too big too soon. He/She ends up blowing it. I can't take this any more. He's/She’s fallen in love so many times now.”

103 “Ow! Paper cut ... Death is all around us.”

104 “This is a pie chart describing my favorite bars. And this is a bar graph describing my favorite pies.”

105 “It's a little late but WHAT THE BALLS IS THIS?”

106 “Hey baby, it's me. Can you bail me out of jail? I thought I saw big foot in Central Park so I tackled him. But it turned out to be Russell Brand.”

107 “Being in a relationship is hard. And committing, making sacrifices it's hard. But if it's the right person, it's easy. Looking at that guy/girl, and knowing he’s/she's all you really want out of life, that should be the easiest thing in the world. And if it's not like that then he’s/she's not the one.”

108 “Here's the thing, NAME. I'm snuggly. You're not. Who wouldn't want to snuggle up next to this business on a Sunday morning? Wrapped in comfort and it's raining outside and there's muffins warming in the oven. I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.”

109 “He’s:She's never seen Star Wars?! NAME, the only people in the universe who haven't seen Star Wars are the characters in Star Wars. And that's cause they lived them, NAME! That's cause they lived the Star Wars.”

110 “Love died. The love that made you all believe in love, that's dead now.”

111 “I’ve never asked NAME to do anything ‘no questions asked’ because I never wanted to. He’s/She’s the love of my life. I never keep anything from him/her.”

112 “Happy Slapsgiving!”

113 “This is what I miss about being in a couple. I always had someone to go to concerts with, or farmer's market, or brunch. God, I miss brunch!” “Well, I guess you could - well, you could try going to brunch alone.” “Oh, you don't think I've tried?” [FLASHBACK]  “Table for one.” “One... Couple?” “Um, no, just me.” “Really? For brunch?” “You're right. Who am I kidding?” [Leaves restaurant. End of Flashback] “Oh, the Popover Pantry! That place is great. Can we go get brunch tomorrow?” “Of course, sweetie.” “Can I go with you guys?” “Really? For brunch?”

114 “That’s life, you know. We never end up where you thought you wanted to be.”

115 “That cake. Best cake I ever had. Seriously, my stomach was like, ‘Hey bro, I don’t know what you’re eating cause I don’t have any eyes but it’s basically awesome, so keep sending it down Gullet Alley.’”

116 “Revenge fantasies never work out the way you want.”

117 “I’m a good boyfriend/girlfriend in my sleep.”

118 “You have to let me dance my own battles.”

119 “One good deed leads to another and another.”

120 “Look at us, riding around in a limo, eating hot dogs…it’s like we’re the president.”

121 “All hail beercules!”

122 “I don’t know what to do with my hands. What do I normally do with my hands?”

123 “Hey, baby.” “We hate NAME now. Get on board or the sexting stops.” “NAME’s a son of a bitch!”

124 “Are these chicken wings or angel wings? God, I love these things.”

125 “Oh, and you think you can step up to me? To me?!”

[bobasheebaby]

70 Scrubs Prompts

Yup, another prompt list. Most of these are actually light and funny, though some are a little heavier. I tried to pick ones that would work outside of a hospital setting. Again it’s super long so cutting at 15. 

1 “And who’s to say this isn’t what happens? Who can tell me that my fantasies won’t come true? Just this once ... “ — John JD Dorian

2 “Look NAME, I don’t know if it’s possible for me to put how I feel about you into words, but I guess I’ll give it a shot. I never really believed I’d find somebody that I love as much as you. I love you more than anything in the whole world. NAME, I love you more than FRIEND.” “Oh my god” “It's kind of hard for me to say, but it's true.” — John JD Dorian and Elliot Reid

3 “I grew up on the street ... No, not the hood. The Sesame Street.” — John JD Dorian

4 “As I looked at all the relationships around me ... Some that had gone on forever ... some that were reigniting ... and some that had just begun ... I realized something: It should have been me.” — John JD Dorian

5 “NAME, you can’t test love. When I met NAME, it seemed he/she was more in love with his/her best friend than with me.” “Honey, they’ve got that almond biscotti FRIEND loves, so I was wondering if I could borrow some money so I can get him/her some.” “No, you got him/her a present yesterday.” — Carla and Turk

6 “You’ve been wrong so many times that I'm not even going to say something is wrong anymore. I'm going to say that it's 'NAME'.

— Perry Cox

7 “I just took a pregnancy test, just tell me when a minute's up.” “I just put some pizza rolls on the microwave oven; the minute that bad boy rings we're good to go.” “Oh, my god, I can't stand it, 30 more seconds.” “OK baby, don't get too excited, they have to cool off for at least a minute.” — Carla and Turk

8 “So, uh, you going to lunch with your brother/sister?” “Yeah, I... well, you know, I would've invited you, but I already made the reservation for two.” “So call and change it to three.” “Ohh, I'm not gonna mess with that hostess. You know, she uses sharp tones.” — Elliot Reid and John JD Dorian

9 “Nothing in this world, that's worth having comes easy.” — Bob Kelso

10 “Yeah, I'm not that great with kids. They've got such tiny hands. It's creepy.” — Elliot Reid

11 “I love this moment so much, I want to have sex with it.” — Perry Cox

12 “Oh, my God! I'm gagging and vomiting at the same time. I'm... I'm gavomiting!” — Perry Cox

13 “So he/she has a cute butt. Everyone has a cute butt. I have a cute butt.” “You should bring it in someday.” — John JD Dorian & Carla Espinosa

14 “The problem with people who only want what they can’t have is that once they have what they want, they don’t want it anymore.” — John JD Dorian

15 “I guess when you care about someone, you’ll do whatever you can to make ’em happy.” —John JD Dorian

16 “The truth is, it is all your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones that make up who you are as a person” — John JD Dorian

17 “‘Cause even if it breaks your heart to be ‘just friends’, if you really care about someone, you’ll take the hit.“ — John JD Dorian

18 “The easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly.” — John JD Dorian

19 “Sometimes in life when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind.” — John JD Dorian

20 “Sex is only good for two things. Making babies and revenge.” — Jordan Sullivan

21 “What's going on?” “I love you too dumpling, but I have to work late. I'll make it up to you this weekend.” “NAME’s on the phone with his/her mom/dad/parent, so we're taking five.” — Jordan Sullivan, Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

22 “By the way, NAME’s here but I'm not going to kiss and tell.” “Oh really? Cause I just got your text that said "bone city".” “Oh really? That came through?” — JD and Elliot

23 “You're gonna love it here, sport.” “Get out while you still can.” “Uh...” “Seriously, get out while you still can.” — Bob Kelso, Ted Buckland, and Keith Dudemeister

24 “Ted, what are you doing?” “I like to do stomach crunches after lunch.” “Ted, lunch was four hours ago.” “Yep, I wasted most of my Tuesday.” “It's Wednesday.” “Aw, man! I missed SHOW!” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

25 “Well, it took a whole tube of gel, but I finally got my hair down.” “No one male or female ever cared, NAME.” — Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

26 “Thirsty, huh?” “Helps the tears taste less bitter.” “Cheers.” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

27 “I have to get ready man. I want my date with NAME to be perfect. What do you think about a romantic horseback ride on the beach?” “Ooh, like you and I did for your birthday.” “Yeah but except this time with two horses.” — John JD Dorian and Turk

28 “I am wearing red. Should I not be wearing red around her?” “She's pregnant, she's not a bull.” — Elliot Reid and Turk

29 “This is why the headache didn't go away, it is actually pronounced 'analgesic', not 'ANALgesic'. The pills go into your mouth.” — Turk

30 [She/he sees NAME holding a beer] “What are you doing? [He/she threatens to open it] “You better not open that.” [He/she opens it] “Okay, you better not drink it.” [He/she takes a sip] “All right, You better not enjoy it.” [He/she expresses enjoyment, person A bitch slaps his/her beer] “Did you just bitch slap my beer?” “Are you calling me a bitch?” “Yes. Yes, I am!” — Carla and Turk

31 “Is there another guy on this planet who is that sensitive?” “Okay, let it out. I've got you. NAME has got you. Hold me tighter, a little too tight...There is a good spot.” — Turk and JD

32 person a “This plan is fool proof.” Person c “That is impossible. You two are involved.” Person c “We will see about that!” [Person a and c crash into each other as they try to walk away] — JD, Perry Cox and Turk

33 person a “I don't think we have anymore wine. NAME, can I have some of yours?” [Person C’s narration: I felt like NAME was starting to blame me for all of this.] [person b Spills his/ her wine in person c’s face) “I spilled mine too, honey. You know what you should do? Ask for some NAME’s.” [Person C Spills his/her wine on his/her crotch] “I spilled mine too.” — Carla, Turk and JD

34 “Wait NAME! I have an idea.” “You have another idea? Well I've got to tell you, I'm done with your ideas and not just for now but forever! Okay, are we clear on that?”  “It's a good one.” “I'm listening.” — JD and Turk

35 “He/she is not allowed to dream about me. It gets too freaky in there.” “Cirque de Soleil freaky. One time, he/she was skinless.” — Carla and Turk

36 “How often do you make love?” “Twice today.” “Actually it was three times. You were asleep for the last one.” “Wow, that really happened? I thought it was weird that you were in one of my sex dreams.” — Marston, Turk and Carla

37 “How was your first stress-free day?” “Horrible. And you?” “Worse. Let's make a baby. If it doesn't work this time I'll kill myself.” “Not helping with the stress.” — Carla and Turk

38 “Dude, there you are. Two things; First, the aliens are here and they're wearing track suits.” “Oh, that's Nana.” — Turk and JD

39 “Are you nude right now?” “Yeah! How'd you know?” “Your voice is always higher when you're nude.” “That's true.” “It's not weird you know that at all.” —JD, Turk and Perry Cox

40 “You know, I actually like NAME. So, don't do that thing you always do.” “If you're referring to the game "Find the Saltine", relax. I don't even play that with NAME anymore.” [Later] “Behind your ear.” [Withdrawing Saltine from behind his ear] “My friend, you have found the Saltine. Uh, but, don't tell NAME we're still playing.”— Elliot Reid, JD and Turk

41 “Dude, he/she keeps a hug schedule with his/her friends!” “Okay, NAME ... looks like someone's getting crossed off their 2 o' clock spot and getting penciled in for never! How does that feel? Does it sting?” Person B Narration: He's hurting! Hug him/her ... hug him/her now! — Turk and JD

42 “Dude, don't sweat it - It says here that the ostrich is generally a docile creature.” “Thank God!” “It also says their kick can kill a man!” — Turk and JD

43 “Just don't repeat the same mistakes you made with me. For instance, don't speed down the road pretending your brakes are out. I don't care if it got you laid once in high school. It is not funny and I still have not forgiven you for killing that pony.” — Elliot Reid

44 “NAME, I don't photograph well. On my driver's license, I look like Gary Busey.” — Elliot Reid

45 “We have a very complicated past.” “Yeah, I hurt him/her, and I'm not proud.” Person B narration: I'm a little proud. — Elliot and JD

46 “NAME and I keep it superficial.” “Love the superficial. Dynamite teeth today!” “Oh thanks buddy!” “Sparkly.” “Yeah!” — Elliot and JD

47 “Will you tell me what NAME’s fantasy was?” “Nope.” “Did it involve chains?” “No.” “Whips?” “Mm-mm.” “Candle wax?” “No.” “Role-playing?” “No.” “Lasers?” “Mm-mm.” “Hamsters?” “Negative.” “Was he/she a Mexican apple thief?” “If only ...” — JD and Elliot

48 “Why don't you just move into my place?” “Oh, great, then we'll be two losers under one roof.” — Elliot and JD

49 “NAME, what you said before ... I knew you were right. Anyway, I'm sorry I got mad. You were wrong about one thing, though - we are moving forward.” “NAME, I'm thirty years old; I'm single, I'm homeless, and I'm pretty sure I just soiled myself.”

— Elliot and JD

50 Person A “Ohhh, my God, you're right.” Person B “Don't let him/her be your puppet-master.” Person C “Hey!” Person B “Hey.” Person C “What's up?” Person B “I have a headache.” Person C “Take some aspirin.” Person B “Don't tell me what to do! You're not the boss of me!” — Carla, Elliot and Jake

51 “I've never connected with a guy/girl like this before. I mean, even though it's only been two weeks, I already feel like I know NAME better than I know myself.” “What does he/she do for a living?” “I should know that.” — Elliot and Carla

52 “Look, the reason I've been acting so weird and having my friends hang around us all the time is because I really think that we have a shot for something great, and I don't wanna go and ruin it by sleeping with you too fast. I mean, what was I supposed to do?” “Well, you...you could have just told me that.” “Yes, but you're forgetting I'm a crazy person!” — Elliot and Jake

53 “I've seen the Wiggles live in concert ... twice.” “Did they perform 'Big Red Car'?” “They opened and closed the show with it. It was awesome.” — Perry Cox and Turk

54 “What's wrong with me?” “You're an annoying, whining man-child.” “That question wasn't directed to you!” “What question?” — JD and Perry Cox

55 “I’m notifying all my old boyfriends/girlfriends today that I'm officially off the market.” “I'm sure the 'pulse' setting on your shower head will be devastated!” — Elliot Reid and Perry Cox

56 “If there is one thing I have learned, it's that you can't schedule love.” “I think your credit card statement would beg to differ.” — Bob Kelso and Perry Cox

57 “Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man/Woman Not Caring.” [points to self] — Perry Cox

58 “If you're worried about people seeing your ass, do what all the other girls do and tie a sweater around your waist.” — Perry Cox

59 “Should I talk slower or get a nurse that speaks fluent moron?” — Perry Cox

60 “Do you actually listen to yourself when you speak, or do you find you drift in and out?” — Perry Cox

61 [thinking] Why don't I ever listen to me? — JD

62 “And you know what else? I quit!” “No you don't!” “Well I'm leaving early today!” “No, you're not! You're coming back to my office to do busy work!” “Fine, but I'm getting a soda first!” “Whatever.” — Ted Buckland and Bob Kelso

63 “Your dog is creepy.” “Aww...be nice to Rowdy. The guy we bought him from used to keep him in a box full of old hats.” — Elliot and JD

64 “I thought we cared about each other ...” “Oh please, if you didn't want to sleep with me, you'd have done the same thing.” “Well, I'll tell you one thing, the last thing in the world I wanna do is sleep wit'cha now!” “Do me right here.” “Okay.” “See!” — JD and Elliot

65 “Huh! I put all those fliers up, and nobody wants me to live with them!” “Oh, come on, NAME. I'm sure you'll eventually find a roommate who's a... clean, non-smoking vegetarian that rinses the shower thoroughly after each usage.” “Oh, well, if you don't, it gets mildewy.” “You know, you should move in with my friend: Anal McLooney.” — Elliot and JD

66 “You know, I've been thinking a lot about us lately.” “Me too.” “God, you drive me crazy.” “Oh, you drive me crazy!” “Sometimes I just lay awake at night, thinking about how unbelievably lucky I am to have you in my life.” “Sometimes you're so controlling it makes me want to strangle you..” — Paul and Elliot

67 “Tonight, I am going to make all of your fantasies come true.” “You know, NAME, I would be happy just to have sex above the covers once.” “Yeah ... never gonna happen.” — Elliot and Paul

68 “You know, it's funny... when I said "I love you," it was an accident - and I never really loved you at all.” “That is an absolute riot.” — Elliot and Paul

69 “Okay, here's what you do: First you say that, even though our relationship is ending, you don't have any regrets.” “Oh, my God! Are you actually telling me how to break up with you?” “You're right. Go ahead.” “If you could just start me off, that'd be super.” — Paul and Elliot

70 Person A “You never explained that U2 thing, did you!” Person B “You know, I've been thinking about it, and maybe it's not such a bad thing that that happened! Right? I mean, things have been going really well between us, and maybe it was fate! I could've been looking at my Bel Biv Devoe CD and said, "I love Bel Biv Devoe" - which I do, by the way. And I'm not ashamed of it.” Person A and B “That girl is poison..." Person A “NAME, look, I just think that if you guys are meant to get to this point, it'll happen... naturally.” Person B “You're right! "I love U2!" Dammit! Why do I always have to say every little thing that comes into my head!? Ugh, I really wish you wouldn't stand so close to me after you take your hummus break. See! I didn't need to say that! I'm gonna tell him.” Person C “Love you!” Person B “Love you more!” Person A “Ugh!” Person B “You know what - brush your teeth, then judge me!” — Carla, Elliot and Paul