#i hate when i'm like “wow i am experiencing such strong emotions right now. what if i drew about it”

[sapsolais]

,

[lokigodofaces]

Me in 2017: I am a perfectly straight person

Me in 2018: I might have a crush on a girl I am a perfectly straight person, why would you ask, why would I be anything else?

Me in 2019: Okay, I have a crush on a girl. Okay. Okay. That's a thing. Oh my gosh, I hate this, this is so stressful! Maybe it is just her, just the one person I've been attracted to that isn't a guy? I've been attracted to a bunch of guys, but she's the only girl I've been attracted to.

Me a little later in 2019: Okay, okay, okay, I think I have a crush on another girl. Okay, this is scary, this is scary. But I like her. I want to hug her and spend time with her! Yes that is somehow different than just wanting to be friends with her.

Me a little later in 2019: Okay, okay, okay, I've calmed down a bit. Let's just accept the facts: I am apparently attracted to guys and girls. I sometimes look at some girls and want to kiss and hug and hold hands and do general romancey stuff. No, I do not want to have sex with girls. No, no, no. Yes, I want to have sex with guys, I want to have children. I guess that makes me biromantic heterosexual? Okay.

Me a little later in 2019: Maybe I do want sex with girls and I'm in denial? I mean, I hugged a girl today and I felt so warm and wanted to keep hugging her, and I did notice her breasts against chest, and that's supposed to be arousing or something. I guess I'm not heterosexual, and am in fact bisexual.

Me in 2020: Wow, I am getting a lot of asexual stuff on my Pinterest, which is a little weird. That demisexual one though, I can kind of relate to that.... Wait a minute. No sexual attraction until after an emotional bond. I was friends with [REDACTED] before I liked her, I was friends with [REDACTED] before I liked him, I was friends with [REDACTED] before I liked her, that one girl I thought I had a crush on I didn't actually have a crush on, I just thought I did because I was all panicky and thinking about girls in romantic ways. Huh. Maybe I am demisexual? I mean, I have to be, right? I don't think I'm allosexual anymore, but I can't be fully asexual, not if I want to have sex.

Me a little later in 2020: Okay, apparently asexuals can have sex, can enjoy it, can seek it out. Huh. That was the one thing stopping me from considering myself as asexual, so I guess I'm biromantic asexual. Also, all those fictional and celebrity crushes I had? Weren't crushes, I convinced myself they were crushes because people are supposedly supposed to have crushes like that.

Me a little later in 2020: Okay, but I was right earlier when I thought I was demisexual. I did only only get crushes after I had a good friendship, all three times. So maybe I'm demiromantic biromantic asexual? I don't know, I think I might be overthinking it.

Me a little later in 2020: Okay, maybe I am demiromantic? I don't know.

Me in 2021: I think I am demiromantic. I'm gonna go with being demiromantic. If I'm wrong, oh well.

Me a little later in 2021 (aka right now): Wait, am I bi? I know I'm attracted to guys and girls, but bi isn't the only mspec label. Am I pan? Omni? Ply? Okay, polyromantic just does not sit well with me, but in a different way than the no-I-can't-possibly-be-gay feeling I had when I was in denial. So I'm gonna take that as a no, I am no polyromantic. So that leaves me with biromantic, omniromantic, and panromantic. Well, I can rule out panromantic, since pans are supposed to be genderblind, and I do feel a little different in my attraction to guys and girls and enbies. And, yes! I am attracted to enbies! I have a crush that is enby! Granted I didn't know until recently, but I learned pre-developing feelings, so this isn't me confusing them as a girl. But the information is still pretty new, and I keep accidentally using she/her and girl for them (I am so sorry [REDACTED] I am so sorry), so I might still just be attracted to them because my brain still thinks they're a girl (literally I keep having to delete shes and hers here to put in theys and thems, I am so sorry). But regardless of that, biromantics are capable of experiencing attraction to enbies. The definition of biromanticism is romantic attraction to two or more genders. And I haven't had a lot of contact with anyone outside the gender binary, just them and a couple others. So how would I know if I'm omniromantic, y'know, attracted to all genders? But ultimately my demiromanticism seems more important to my attraction than anything else. All the people I've been attracted to needed a strong emotional bond. And the ones that I lost quickly had less of a bond with me. Even the ones I don't have a crush on anymore (feelings are like that, especially in high school) I'm still really close with. So based on that you could assume that bond matters more than gender, but since I am not perfectly genderblind it is not unreasonable to assume I am omniromantic. But I'm still not sure. Besides, no one knows I'm questioning and people are giving me biromantic stuff for my birthday, and biromantics can be attracted to all genders as well, so maybe I should stick with that? But I'm a perfectionist so part of me really wants to get this nailed down.

Me at the same time in 2021 (aka now): Okay, but people can be greyromantic and demiromantic at the same time, right? I know I'm demiromantic, but what if I'm greyromantic? So the idea would be that I need an emotional bond to form attraction, but I also get attraction considerably less than alloros and other demiros, correct? Well, it seems like I get crushes less than my alloro friends. And it even feels like it happens less than my demiro friends. So maybe? But I don't want to jump to conclusions since I really don't know what everyone else is experiencing.

In case any of you wanted to know what it can be like figuring yourself out. It often takes years and lots of anxiety.

[mittensmorgul]

Incoming sad rant about the spn ending. Don't read if you're not interested in reading something like that, but I literally don't know anyone in real life I can talk about this with, and I really need an outlet:

Sometimes I can put the way SPN ended out of my head and think "it's just a stupid show. I don't have to accept the finale, and the writers/network are wrong." But other times I just get gripped with really intense sadness at the disrespect that was done to my favorite characters. To the point where I'll sit still for hours a day, just wallowing in it. It ruins my whole day and mood. And then I think to myself "I'll just find some other stories that end better!" but then I get sad again, cuz I don't think I will ever love other characters as much as I love Dean and Cas, and then I spiral again thinking about all the potential this unique beautiful love story had, and how we're never going to get the closure we deserve.

I really hate that after all this time, I'm a grown ass adult getting sad over fictional characters. I know it's not that trivial, but I sometimes wish it was so I could get over it 😞

Hi hi, and first of all *socially distanced internet hugs* I’m sorry you don’t have an outlet, but you’re always welcome to chat with me (if you come off anon we can talk privately if you want. My DM’s are always open, even when it takes me a bit to reply. no one should have to feel alone in this.)

I’m actually gonna start at the bottom of your message and work my way up, because I also, as a grown-ass adult, get sad over fictional characters. And I need to emphasize that this is the *point* of fiction. A well-written and developed fictional character is *indistinguishable in our minds from an actual real human being.* The way we react to them *feels exactly the same to our brains and bodies* as how we react to real people, and that’s a testament to just how well developed Dean and Cas were in canon.

I am not a young person. I have engaged with a lot of media over my life, and have *never* felt this strongly about fictional characters before, so I understand what you mean when you struggle to think about finding another story that ended better, or struggle to think about finding other characters you might become this attached to or experience this sort of emotional investment in. And I think there is another factor you didn’t consider there: The vast majority of other media I have engaged with, I was able to relate to on a level of “oh that’s nice for them” or “wow that sucks for them.” I have never, and possibly never will again, feel so utterly invested in fictional characters, to the point where it affects my real life as much as Supernatural has. Period.

I will likely never experience *literal physical lovesickness* over two fictional characters ever again. I hadn’t ever experienced it *in my own real life* before, and yet 15.18 triggered all those symptoms in me. As an aromantic person, this was pretty shocking to me. It also says a lot about just how real these characters feel to us, and how important they have become to us. They make us feel this! This is not an accident. It’s *incredibly difficult* to create fictional characters with this range and depth of emotional connection, and yet here we are.

I think that’s the biggest evidence possibly to present in defense of the statement that THIS IS NOT JUST SOME STUPID SHOW.

Other evidence: this fandom, still going strong after 15 years. Look at every SPN convention for proof. Look at AO3, where there are more posted stories about Dean and Cas than literally any other pairing on the planet (by a not-small margin, too). If that isn’t enough evidence, we have fanart to look at as well. Look through @theroadsofararchive where at the time of this posting there are over 40,000 artworks catalogued, and more being added all the time. Same with @canonspngifs where you can search through through nearly 75,000 gifsets organized by an excellent tagging system and made by dedicated fans out of love for the thing. This is all proof that you are not alone, that so many of us care just as deeply about them as you do. Not even mentioning the people who have written hundreds of millions of words of meta, articles, and even masters theses and doctoral dissertations on Supernatural and the fandom. This is a unique thing, even within the larger fandom culture. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that your feelings for it are stupid or irrelevant or wrong.

But also don’t let anyone try to convince you that you must accept the finale as part of the story if you don’t want to. Don’t even let *yourself* believe that if you don’t want to. This show has done more to play with the themes of “what is reality” and “who gives a story meaning” and alternate universes and curses and djinn dreams to easily account for whatever the heck the finale was.

my current go-to theory: everything after Chuck’s defeat takes place in the Mockumentary Alternate Universe... it fits way too uncomfortably well... and then I just apply the fic I received in a cosmic transmission from the actual supernatural universe wrote detailing the events of what *I* hoped would transpire afterward. I know this doesn’t work for everyone, but it works for me, mostly because it *has* to. It means far too much to me not to.

You are not alone in having invested yourself into this story, and these characters. Your feelings about them are not wrong or stupid or frivolous. And the proof is everyone else who feels the same exact way, who connected to this story (and to each other through this story), and whose lives have been forever altered through this journey together. The fact that Dabb turned out to have been Chuck Junior and couldn’t see (or was prevented from showing us) what Team Free Will would’ve chosen to do with that after defeating their original creator just stands to prove to me that the finale can’t possibly be The Truth, you know?

I don’t know if any of this will help you, or provide you some small comfort right now, but maybe it will eventually. We’re all processing the loss of the show and the abject failure of story that was the finale in different ways, and I’m sure our emotional reactions will shift over time. It was just A Lot to process all in the span of a few incredibly emotional weeks-- not even mentioning how all of that emotional response was compounded by the american elections and surrounding nonsense, the general stress of enduring a global pandemic and all that entails, and *waves hands around broadly at everything else contributing to the trauma occurring in the collective of humankind right now.* We’ve all been emotionally compromised, so be kind to yourself in how you feel you’re coping with it all.

And know that no matter what, you are not alone in how you’re feeling. The grief is real, and our brains don’t care if it’s felt for fictional characters or real people. This was honestly a once in a lifetime experience for a lot of us, and not even the wtf of the finale can kill it for us if we don’t let it. I reject that particular piece of rusty rebar and choose to believe in a just and narratively coherent resolution. To do anything less feels like dishonoring the story and characters who have drawn me in and made me feel so much for them over the years. If the story itself couldn’t honor them properly, then I can choose to do so myself.

<3

[katsuukiwii]

Could I get a matchup for AOT, Black Butler and MHA, please? 😊

Personality: I push myself REALLY hard. I have a lot of willpower and am VERY stubborn. I try to be highly independent, usually to a fault. I don't like asking for help and it takes me a very long time to realize and admit I need it.

I'm distrusting and cynical and have been through a lot. I get stressed out really easy and am anxious and depressed. But my anxiety is usually hostile/aggressive. When I get anxious or stressed, I usually lash out or try to control things. When I'm depressed I usually shut down completely or dissociate really bad. (Wow this sounds so negative when I type this.)

This combination (being stubborn and refusing help, but also being very handicapped) is harmful to myself and I've begun to finally realize that. I've been gradually trying to accept help from others more and allow myself to not live up to unrealistic standards. I would need someone who is supportive of this and someone would help me stop pushing myself into oblivion.

On a more positive note, when I'm not stressed or being combative, I really love life and am one of those people that appreciates seemingly insignificant things that most people take for granted. I'm also very sensory oriented. Even something really small can greatly lift my mood, like a nice breeze or rain or a flower. I like being outside for a part of the day because of this.

I can be a little weird and don't really care too much tbh. I do weird or sometimes childish/childlike things like chase/stalk geese or immitate animal sounds. I can also be very mischievous if my mental health has been doing well for a long time and I am happy. I will pull pranks or be evasive when speaking or play (not malicious) mind games.

I also tend to love VERY deeply when I fall in love. I feel very strong emotion and affection towards that person, am fiercely loyal and am usually sacrificial to a fault for them (again, push myself too hard).

I'm easily crushed if that person I love abuses my love or neglects me.

(I also hate very intensely too and can be very petty, spiteful and vengeful. Just strong emotions, I guess.)

Sexually, I honestly can't see myself being dominant even if I tried. I probably would try, but would fall apart. I also have a very big masochistic streak. I like very intimate sex. Not necessarily soft, slow or gentle (but it could be these), just physically and emotionally intimate.

That's it cause I don't want to type too much and make this super long! Thank you very much, you are great! 😞 Matchups can be hard, I appreciate your effort!!

Matchups!

No, no, thank you for making this long! I got a lot of details from it! I appreciate the appreciation! It SOUNDS negative, but I know people PERSONALLY who have experienced similar things to you (from what I read) and have seen these sorts of things, so I hope I gave you good results! Im glad you were willing to be so open, even if it’s through anon, that stuff can be hard to talk about ^^

Attack On Titan:

I ship you with Reiner Braun!

He doesn’t know EXACTLY what you’re going through, but he does his hardest to try and understand so he can help you out. He’s dealt with some issues on his own, and knows that its no fun to experience it on your own!

Your can get aggressive, all good! Reiner knows you truly don’t mean any harm towards him, you just have a lot on your mind that you need to let out.

He wants you to come to him if anything is on your mind, good or bad! He wants you to know that he’s there for you, and that he loves you no matter what! He gets so happy when you say that you want to reach out to people, and get help

Now, onto happier things! He loves taking you on walks, especially if it’s raining! He likes to get outside too, so he doesn’t mind a bit!

He’s uh...not the smartest, so mind games can confuse him! He loves to pull pranks with you, usually on poor Connie, or Jean.

He understands that you like to be independent, but he also knows that nobody is capable of doing everything! He likes for you to admit if you need help with something, since it helps you learn, but if you refuse to he’ll just try and have you do something else while he helps. It doesn’t work often, but he still tries!

He doesn’t mind your weird side! He’ll watch you stalk geese, but won’t actually join you. It doesn’t make him ashamed, it’s just not his thing. As usual, if you REALLY want him to, he will.

BUT he does like to try and imitate animal sounds with you, he thinks if silly!

For sex, you’re submissive, all good! I picture him being more of a top anyway! So, you like something kind of rough, but intimate, and loving, and he’s totally cool with that as well! It fits him perfectly! Plus he’s a big guy, so sometimes he can unintentionally hurt you (not horribly), and he’ll apologize even if you liked it.

Aftercare g o d. Always makes sure you feel okay, and comfortable about what happened! He’ll make sure you’re nice and clean, and then give you some snuggles if you want!

Runner-Ups: Erwin Smith and Armin Arlert

My Hero Academia:

I ship you with Eijiro Kirishima!

It takes Kirishima a minute to get used to your hostility (only when you have those moments, ofc). He doesn’t really know what to do until one day, where he doesn’t force you to do anything. He speaks to you in a gentle voice,

“I’m not going to force you to do anything. But I would really appreciate it if you just....opened up to me. I’m not sure how to help you out, I need you to show me. So can we talk, please?”

You try to be more open after that, and in all honesty, it didn’t just help you, but it helped him. A LOT. He just wants to do his best for you!

Yes, maybe he has called people whiny before, but he still knows that emotions are very important. Everybody has to let them out every now and then!

He will NOT take your for granted. Not just because it’s “manly”, but because he cares so much about you, and he wants you to know that you aren’t alone!

Now, he, unlike Reiner will TOTALLY chase geese with you AND imitate animal sounds! He’s a child at heart as well. He’ll take a walk outside with you! He prefers to be inside, but he doesn’t hate it! Plus he loves to see how calm you are when letting the rain fall on our hand, on taking in the vibrant colors of a flower!

He’ll catch on to SOME of your mind games, but he can get stumped! You often pull pranks on him, and he still laughs about it and has fun! What a sweetheart!

During sex, he’s all good with being on top! He will be a bit reluctant to hurt you if you ask, but eventually you’ll make him comfortable enough to be a little rough, nothing to far though!

He IS a switch, but he’s absolutely fine with you wanting to be on bottom! The only thing is that he is very sensitive physically, so he can get vocal. SO even if he is on top, his face could be bright red with his eyes shut tight, it’s cute!

Runner-Ups: Hizashi Yamada and Shouta Aizawa

Black Butler:

I ship you with Sebastian Michaelis!

This man is probably one of the BEST options for you, honestly!

He knows just how to calm you down almost right off the bat! Of course, everybody requires a bit of adjustment, but for him it was a piece of cake!

Of course, he can get a bit annoyed if you get SUPER aggressive, but that doesn’t mean he hates you! He still cares about you so much, but it can be a lot, even for him. 

He makes sure you get the help you need!

Let’s be honest, most of us know that scene with Beast. He CAN be manipulative, but he would N E V E R do it towards you. He’ll tell you and show you. So he will praise you in bed if you need it, or even if he feels like it.

You absolutely cannot play mind games with him. He’s too smart. If anything it’ll turn into him playing a (not malicious) mind game on you. He likes to tease you, but he makes sure not to take it too far!

Absolutely will not chase geese. It’s not for him. He will only do it if you wanted him to catch one. In that case, he could probably catch a few with his skills!

He doesn’t imitate animals sounds with you...in public, that is. In private, he likes to as well! He’s not quite sure why.

And now, for sex! We’ve seen the scene with the nun. This man goes HARD! Of course, he can be gentle, but it’s in his nature to be rougher than the average person. If you want him to be gentle, he will. BUT if you do want a little pain he is totally down. Definitely a sadist. He fine with you being on bottom!

Runner-Ups:  Adrian Crevan and Claude Faustus

[blogenana]

Doctor Who - Earthshock Live Review

So I have my crisps and lemonade and im ready to continue my journey through classic who - idk why I just started live blogging it...

• People are climbing

• So they've found something- an alien I'm assuming- why do humans always tamper with things we shouldn't

• Oh they haven't found something theyre looking for people

• I hate how classic who drags on so slowly

• Sinister music

• 'probably nothing" foreshadowing...

• Okay get to the killing already

• YES FINALLY HELLO DOCTOR

• Wow I forget they must have their own rooms in the Tardis

• Lots of books in Adrics room

• "why should that interest me" ooh okay Adric getting a bit sassy

• Why's he fed up

• looool "I'm tired of being considered a joke" "why am I being constantly teased" maybe because you're annoying and you make sexist remarks?

• oh chill

• The doctor don't have time to deal with this

• aww okay Adric being jealous that Nyssa and Tegan get more attention from the doctor than him is kinda cute

• 'I give you my word' 'just as you gave your word to Tegan" okaaaaay go off (spoiler alert) ik Adric dies in this because I saw a spoiler so this is very sad foreshadowing that the doctor will break his word to Adric about making time for him- kinda sad

• I hate the celery stick

• okay Adric kick off

• Doctor can't take criticism which is interesting because the last time he was probably ever blamed for something was One with Barbara and Ian. I don't remember any companion ever criticizing him like this before

• 'Well it can wait' you'll regret that

• "I'm tired of being an outsider" this would make sense if we had seen him being an outsider before - in my opinion Tegan is the outsider as she's new and not as mathematically advanced as the others. also I would say that Adric is the closest to the doctor out of all 3 so his point isn't really valid

• I guess this is the writers way of making adrics death more tragic

• ooh Adrics theme

• I swear he was an outsider amongst his own people too

• 'the tools would go missing" why do these people never take the hint

• forgot Adric was from e space- tbh what was the doctors plan when he did demand to go home eventually- did he wanna travel with him till he died?

• "e space is another universe, there isn't a taxi service that goes back and forth"

• Romana mention!

• "im not waiting around while you plot the course to your own destruction" the doctor has never experienced a companion death before - also foreshadowing

• "you know I think since his regeneration he's become decidedly immature" this is funny also like 4 was soooo mature

• I like Adric and Five's relationship

• the actor who plays Adric has gone better

• Nyssa is the most mature out of this entire group

• "breathe deeply and relax" why is Tegan a meditation instructer out of nowhere

• the doctor didn't take much convincing

• lol the doctor bopping Tegans nose was cute

• Ooh Dinosaur bones

• let me guess - the asteroid that killed the dinosaurs was an alien spaceship or aliens killed them

• Someone screamed

• Ooh yeah she be dead

• Okay the villains look like they're wearing gimp costumes

• Reminds me of American Horror Story Murder House & the leather monster

• Aah doctor who giving a lesson on how the dinosaurs were killed. We love a show that educates

• Did I mention how much I hate the celery stick because I hate it honestly whose idea was it

• Bro chill why is this man grabbing the doctor like that what he do

• Calm the fuck down mate

• Gimp people be shooting

• Okay they may be androids but they'll always be gimp people to me

• Android vision

• CYBERMEN!!!! DAMN

• Why they gotta hit us with the plot twist like that i wasn't ready

• The Cybermen looks sad

• Hehehe the face is funny

• Gimps be strong

• Why do the Cybermen sound muffled

• I find it more creepy when they have human voices than Robots because it makes It more real that these machines have humans in them

• hHaven't seen them in some time

• I love Tegans sarcasm

• I'm cracking up at the Cybermen voice

• 1 gimp down 1 to go

• tThe gimps be dead

• 'prepare to activate the devise" dun dun DUN

• Damn the Cybermen be skinny

• I'm bored i want doctor/cybeman action

• Okay it's getting intense

• Cybermen be SHOOK

• "cyber technology is too advanced for earthlings" figure it out then mate

• He's recognised the Tardis

• THE BEST DIALOGUE "TIME LORDS, BUT THEYRE FORBIDDEN TO INTERFERE"

• THIS ONE CALLS HIMSELF THE DOCTOR, AND DOES NOTHING BUT INTERFERE

• YESS PREVIOUS DOCTORS VS CYBERMEN

• I'm geeking out

• Imma watch this bit a few times hang on

• Aah I loved that it was so cool bloody hell I'm a nerd

• The 2nd Cybermen looked shocked while he was watching

• "have you no emotions sir" classic

• "Adric do you have a moment" "I'm hungry" Okay I like him in this one he's a mood. Why is he suddenly likeable the ep he dies

• "all part of the daily routine" see what I mean

• Well your daily routine Is gonna end soon

• He doesn't wanna go home!!

• Doctor is relieved it's cute

• Ah this is sad

• It would be easier if i didn't know he was gonna die

• Cos I do like their relationship

• Okay we're being introduced to new people

• "you're beginning to bore me" the writers knew

• I'm trying really hard to concentrate I've zoned out

• Ah the doctor has got my attention "I want to announce my presence, see what the reaction is" course

• aaaand the doctor is caught and he's being accused for murder again

• Don't they have cctv just check it

• "apprehended why can't he just say caught" me in English classes

• 'even under the threat of death he has the arrogance of a time lord"

• I thought Cybermen had no emotions but this Cybermen just said he wants the doctor to suffer for their past defeats - revenge is an emotion which is v ironic

• Hh SHIT the Cybermen are walking

• lol tegan " im just a mouth and legs" she's such a mood

• The Cybermen music is cool

• The doctors face when he sees them

• Aah the soldier has betrayed them

• Why is it that whenever there's a women in charge the men who is second can't handle it and goes rogue

• iIt's such a typical trope

• The dialogue for the doctor is great

• "you know them"

• "oh yes, we go back a long way"

• Haha "I'm surprised they didn't mention me" 'well perhaps you overestimate your importance" "oh I doubt it" doctor is and will always be that bitch

• The doctor is doing doctory things

• "that's very clever" "oh it is" the doctor bragging about how clever he is starts here

• Damn tegan she just shot a Cyberman

• Flashback to "the doctor makes people into weapons"

• Finally the doctor vs Cybermen showdown

• Lol I knew they would kill the betrayer

• "our records indicate that you have a fondness for earth" (especially earth girls)

• "this time we shall succeed in destroying the earth" no you won't mate

• Ah the Cybermen coming out of plastic Wrap is a throwback to the 2nd Doctor Cybermen story

• Tegan looks like a badass with the gun

• So they're destroying the leaders of various planets before they destroy the Cybermen

• Tegan has no idea what she's doing

• I love how Five says the most savage lines with the most polite tone

• He could tear you down and look like he's complimenting you

• Tegan has been caught

• Cyberman in the Tardis is weird

• 'who is this woman' - 'no-one of consequence' - 'thanks a lot - gotta love Tegan

• Okay wow that scene between the doctor and the Cyberman about emotions gave me goose bumps what a thrilling scene

• The Cybermen has a point- he can control the doctor because he has emotions

• I'll never get tired of the debate about emotions between them because it genuinely feels like the Cyberman defend the concept of having no emotions to defend their existence

• Five looks hot when he's defending emotions

• Fuck they need to leave Adric behind

• Shit I'm getting nervous

• His theme is playing!

• The Doctor looks conflicted

• Adric leaving his hand out after the doctor let go...

• "I'll see you soon" this is the actors best performance because you can see in his eyes he knows he won't

• The Doctor has never had a companion die before so he walks away without looking back

• "it will once you start getting rusty" Tegan is funny

• Adric is plotting

• The Cybermen say they have no emotions but forcing Tegan watch her own planet getting destroyed is extremely sadistic

• Clever Adric

• The Earth looks different

• Okay so Adric's cleverness is what gets him killed because he knows he can crack the code

• The Dinosaurs! I knew it!

• Oh crap Earth is safe but Adric doesn't know that

• I think this comes down to Adric wanting the doctors attention and wanting to be the best to have his attention

• The Doctor has his pin!

• Five suffocating and shooting a Cyberman is shocking to see

• Adric whyyyyyy

• This Cyberman walking towards him is bloody persistent

• "Now I'll never know if i was right" such Adric last words

• Id like to believe he was

• Damn.

• The Doctors face. The fact that it could have been avoided if he just left the ship

• Adric is the first companion that died on the Doctor's watch

• Adric died thinking the Earth was going to be destroyed and he could have stopped it

• The credits!! his gold star! the silence! this must have been a shock to the viewers. If i didn't know beforehand through spoilers I would be going crazy

• Earthshock had it's ups and downs, the downs in regards to the pace of the plot however the story was good and the Cybermen were fantastic especially their interactions against the doctor. Tegan and Adric were great. Nyssa didn't really have much to do. Davison was amazing. I liked the writing.

• Also I liked the structural shift of the story to the cave androids to the bomb to the spaceship to dealing with The Cybermen to saving Earth and then to Adrics death