#i hate to do that but at this point it's so much more trouble than it's worth with these kids
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Holy shit, reading all of this just felt so damn good. I'm blind in my left eye and need glasses to see through my right, so reading other's experiences with only one functioning eye is...nice.
I thought I might share some of my experiences, because I don't really think too much about it honestly, I just know how things go for me because being half-blind is my normal.
Slopes and uneven ground are the worst. Walking is more than just seeing the ground in front of you, its also feeling it with your feet. When just out and about during the day, I can see just fine, but I do need/prefer stable ground because my depth perception is off and my balance is shit. So when dealing with say, a hill or holes i nthe ground, I take it slower, feel out each step because I can't tell how deep something is by just looknig down at it.
My night vision is also...not a thing, lol! I've gone out at night before, but would have to rely on having a torch (flashlight for you americans) with me and point down at my feet so I can see where I'm walking. For real, one time when I was walking home i nthe dark I accidently stepped onto the curb of the road because I couldn't tell I was veering that close to it, but I course corrected pretty quick. Because of my shit night-vision, we've got a motion-sensor light in the hallway for me, and I have a little lamp in my room for whenever I need to get up in the middle of the night. I don't necessarily need to turn a room's light on to see, I just need enough to tell where I'm going because gonig from darkenss with some light to full on "let me turn the bathroom light on for you" means I need to take like..ten, twenty seconds for my eyes to adjust to the suddenly bright light flooding my vision.
I'm not sure if this next thing is because I'm half-blind, or just a me thing, but I tend to not do well with navigation or cluttered environments. For example, If I need to find a phone on a table covered in clutter, you can see it, its right there surrounded by other things, but its there. I cannot see it, its not in an obvious spot where I could notice it at first glance, there's too many things, even if you point it out to me, I would still have trouble finding it. This applies to video games too! I often get lost in video games, or need my friend to point out something I missied because I just don't notice it amongst everything else.
I hate bright light. I'm very sensitive to bright light to the point most of the curtains in my home are closed, I wish real life had a brightness setting, and sunlight glinting off cars on a sunny day is my own personal hell. I've gotten flashbanged walking into the bathroom a couple of time because Mum opened all the curtains in there for important reasons I can't remember (like, she did close them later on, they are normally closed but sometimes they're open if the windows need to be cleaned or something).
People think I'm more blind than I am at first. When they first learn I can't see out of one eye, they assume I need to have things pointed out to me, like "watch out for the step/curb." when its during the day... I can see just fine, that's what the glasses are for. Yeah I can't see shit at night and will let people know that, but I know what I can and can't do...it's like people take a bit of time to really get the message that only under certain conditions do I need help and can manage the rest of the time perfectly fine on my own.
I prefer to have people walk on my blind side, because that's the side I'm keeping a closer eye on, so its easier for me to walk and talk with someone if they stay at my left.
Let's see what else? I do the head turning thing too! Its way easier and less eye strain to just turn my head towards something to look at it.
With my vision being the way it is I need to be mindful of what videogames I play. Yeah there's the obvious thing of most horror games are out because I would need to crank up the brightnesn super high and its frustrating not being able to see shit, but there's also ui elements to take into consideration. If a game uses small font, or a small hud, that's just eye strain and a headache waiting to happen. I've bought games wheere I;ve had to stop laying them because the console ports just aren't made for people like me who need larger font sizes and ui scaling, and I don't play PC because my laptop isn't a gaming one, and its much more comfortable for me to play console games because my large tv means less eye strain because its a bigger screen.
Speaking of the laptop! I wish most sites were zoom-friendly...like I need to have my web browser set to be zoomed in because again, I need the larger font and ui elements even when browsing the web. Most of the sites I frequent are fine with this (namely tumblr and AO3) but some of the sites i do use aren't zoom firendly and I have to zoom out to use the site properly, and that means tiny font and stress because I have my shit zoomed in for a fucking reason! but no, a lot of sites just don't do well with the fact that I have stuff zoomed in at 90 or 100%, like they weren't desinged to be used with zoom or larger fonts in mind.
I have to write my fanfics with font size 22 or 24 and then scale it down to a more presentable size 16 when I want to share previews of what I'm writing via google docs. Thankfully I don't have to worry about doing this on AO3.
Some of this wound up being a little bit ranty, don't take it too seriously, its just little things that frustrate me sometimes.
Stuff about having monocular vision that people don’t know (in my experience)
1. You only ever sit on one side of a room. (Especially if you’re in class) If you’re blind in your left eye like me, you sit to the left of the room so your right eye has the greatest scope, and there’s not much to your left to look at.
2. Harder time seeing past obstacles. People with two eye vision have the perception of both their eyes blend together for one image. Without this, you only have one eye, so you’re don’t get to see past obstacles the same way. For example if something is blocked for your right eye and not for your left, you can still see it through your left. For people with monocular vision this isn’t possible.
3. People don’t walk on the side of your blind eye. It may just be me, but because I’m blind in my left eye I tend to accidentally bump into people if they’re on my left. So when people walk beside me I naturally go so they’re to my right, or they do, without it being discussed.
4. 3D movies are headaches. Even though we’ve progressed past the red-blue type glasses, 3D just doesn’t work well for monocular vision. (And you know those fun optical illusions? A lot of them don’t work at all- nothing happens!)
5. Things like grabbing a pencil without looking at it are extremely difficult. (Due to lack of depth perception, you have a hard time discerning where things are in 3D space). This also stretches to having bad posture and balance. Meanwhile, things that are flat are relatively easy.
6. You turn your head when you’re looking at something, so your good eye is focused on it. This includes tilting your head at worksheets, TVs, and computer screens- and also people.
7. Seeing in the dark is also much harder, because people rely on their depth perception for it, and without that stuff gets real hard
8. The headaches. Most people with blindness don’t experience total blindness, but instead low vision, where their vision is not able to be used in a way that’s helpful. Your brain tries to merge the images, or use your bad eye to see something in the peripheral. This just makes your head hurt. Much like people who need time to adjust to having glasses due to the headache, getting headaches is common because your vision is always at odds.
9. More susceptible to eye damage. Since you’re not overly aware of your bad eye, you may not notice if the sun is shining directly at it. I tend to squint with my bad eye whenever I’m outside, without thinking about it. Additionally, you’re more wary of anything that could damage your good eye. It’s the only one, so you gotta be careful with it.
10. Also, it makes things really, really weird if there’s a bright light from one side but not from another. There are often after images that float in my vision.
11. Looking at things that are moving can be hard. I can focus on an object, but if a camera is panning in some direction without being focused on one thing in particular, I just stop being able to make sense of what I’m seeing. It becomes very jarring.
12. Sometimes it’s not that your eye necessarily has anything wrong with it, but that your optic nerve isn’t fully connected. So the eye may be healthy, but your brain shut it off, and the connection between the light coming in your eye, and the way the brain interprets it, never fully formed. Funnily enough, I’ve heard that this can cause the connection between your good eye and your brain to be stronger, as it is with mine. For some people it’s the opposite, and it makes both of their eyes worse. Peoples experiences can really differ.
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“Riptide is so plain and/or boring!”
You know what? I genuinely don’t give a f***.
He’s a caring and nice character, that I like and even enjoy, and I think it’s quite neat that Tsunami had someone else she could rely on when she was having troubles within the SeaWing palace while living with freaking Queen Coral and - three moons - Whirlpool.
Plus, Riptide is NOT as plain as some people view him - or at least, he has the potential to be (seen as) a interesting character, but unfortunately wasn’t as explored and/or developed upon unlike some other characters within the series.
Riptide had a rather bad and traumatic past. Webs left him when he was 2 years old - about the current age of Anemone and MINK - in order to take Tsunami’s egg to the the Talons of Peace so he can raise her to be within the prophecy. His mother was indirectly KILLED by Coral by her purposefully putting his mom in the front lines of the war, due to her helping Webs take Tsunami’s egg.
Due to this, Riptide probably became a literal ORPHAN as a very young dragonet, while living under a violent Queen who HATES his guts.
And due to Webs taking Tsunami’s egg, Coral unrightfully viewed Riptide to be an awful dragon, due to him being related to Webs. Because of this, Riptide is hated and discriminated by Queen Coral and her relatives, and he has a bad and low reputation within his Kingdom based off of crimes he DIDN’T EVEN COMMIT. With this reputation being something that he lived with through the MAJORITY of his life. Which includes him being given the lowest ranking job and duty within the SeaWing kingdom.
Heck, I wouldn’t be surprised that the reason why Riptide seems so ‘plain’ and/or ‘boring’ because he literally HAD to act that way around others - with him placing that part within himself and ingrained it within his personality and/or behavior - in order to NOT stand out and grab the attention of others who actively hate him, and would harm & even KILL him. Especially from how much he’s canonically hated by Coral.
Because if Riptide was noticed to be against Coral’s actions or beliefs, and/or was seen doing something that (majorly) upsets Coral, there’s a good chance - heck, a HIGH chance - that Coral would instantly brutally harm and/or kill him on the spot.
Riptide is one of the characters within the series that, despite the awful treatment and trauma he experienced throughout his life, is STILL a kind, caring, and/or empathetic dragon, who does his best to helps others that he cares about - including Tsunami.
He’s a dragon who cares about his tribe to the point he fought the SkyWings for them instead of fleeing away from the Summer Palace with Webs and Tsunami (and Tsunami’s friends), despite the awful treatment Riptide experienced for the majority of his life under his tribe’s royalty.
Who’s also a dragon who still wanted to form a connection with his father, who left him and hasn’t seen Riptide for a long time. One who is the only potential dragon who would love and/or care for Riptide for who he is.
A father that Riptide then learned later with TLH that Webs was a enabler of the abuse that Tsunami and her friends experienced from Kestrels and Dune, due to Webs not stopping them from being harmed until Queen Scarlet tried to imprison them in her arena.
Plus, when knowing about Riptide’s trauma and how much he experienced prejudice from others, his relationship and interactions with Tsunami honestly are more interesting than they seem to be.
How Riptide INSTANTLY rushed towards Tsunami in order to embrace her after she unintentionally flirted with him.
How Tsunami is probably the first dragon he’s known in a long while who respects, appreciates, and even enjoys his presence and existence.
That Riptide followed and watched over Tsunami while she was at the SeaWing Kingdom, probably due to him being worried about her being with Coral.
That Riptide selflessly helped and hanged out with Tsunami despite Coral potentially punishing and/or harming him for doing so.
How Riptide hid the fact that he was related to Webs, and that he’s a member of the Talons of Peace, probably in fear that Tsunami - the only dragon he has a positive bond with in TLH - would be angry at him, & dislike and/or hate him, possibly similarly how other dragons (including her relatives) hate him.
But despite this, he cared about being honest with Tsunami that he had the mental maturity and/or mental strength to tell Tsunami that he joined the Talons of Peace in order to know more about his father.
So yeah - Riptide is quite a nice character, who’s even pretty interesting, or at least is when you really think about him.
But he unfortunately isn’t viewed that way and/or isn’t even appreciated by multiple parts of the WoF fandom, due to him not having an prominent and/or strong personality compared to other love interests within the series.
.
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The Boss Part 4 -Oneshot
Word count: 1915
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
“I don’t understand why this is a big deal,” Bucky groaned, picking up his work bag and adjusting his suit jacket.
“What do you mean? It’s a big deal in any relationship,” Y/N said incredulously. “Meeting the family is a big step.”
“It’s just Sunday brunch with my sister,” Bucky said, giving her an unimpressed look.
“The sister that I know so little about, other than the fact that she and I have similar traumatic experiences and she’s a designer. Yeah, I’m feeling really prepared,” Y/N replied sarcastically, grabbing her own bag and walking to the garage. Bucky was right behind her, unlocking the car and sighing heavily. Y/N rolled her eyes.
“Why would you need to be prepared? It’s not a business lunch. You just be yourself. I think you both would get along really well,” he continued as he pulled the car out of the garage.
“Sure. We’re out of the house, no more home talk,” Y/N said, trying to shut down the conversation.
Bucky gave her a frustrated glance before putting it in drive and taking off. The drive was silent, which was out of the ordinary. Y/N knew she was being a little ridiculous. It was just a brunch. With his sister. But she didn’t know much about her. And meeting new people, especially people that were important to Bucky, was always nerve-wracking. What if they didn’t get along? What if his sister hated her? What if she saw something in Y/N that Bucky didn’t see and told him he deserved better or should find somebody else? As secure in her relationship as she felt, this was introducing a new dynamic into it, something deeper and more serious between them.
During the work day Y/N was much quieter and curt with Bucky. Her regular friendly, polite banter was gone, and she was getting looks from others in the office. “Are you okay, Y/N?” Steve asked while they were both in the break room getting lunch.
“What? I’m fine,” Y/N said, frowning at him.
He gave her an arched eyebrow. “Uh huh,” he said, unconvinced. “Trouble at home?”
Y/N rolled her eyes. Steve was the only one who knew that she and Bucky were together. “Did he say something to you?” she asked him.
“No. But neither of you are good at keeping a straight face,” he replied.
“Good to know,” she huffed and grabbed her food. “Bye Steve.”
“Bye Y/N,” he sing-songed back at her as she marched out of the break room. She walked out of the office to the hallway leading to the elevators, then quickly veered into the stairwell. She sat down on the steps, using her legs as a tray to eat her food. She just wanted some peace and quiet for a moment as she ate.
“What are you doing in here?” Bucky’s voice echoed through the stairwell as he opened the door.
“Eating lunch,” Y/N said around a big bite in her mouth.
“No shit Sherlock. Why are you in the stairwell?” Bucky asked sharply.
Y/N took her time chewing then swallowing her bite. “Just wanted some alone time. I still have 20 minutes for lunch. I’ll be in soon.”
Bucky watched her silently, but she wouldn’t meet his gaze, focusing on her food and taking another big bite. “This is ridiculous,” he griped, then walked down the stairs enough to be at eye level with her. “Quit acting like you’re this shy, nervous little thing that can’t handle meeting new people. It’s just Becca. I don’t understand why you’re so worried about it.”
“Uh uh uh, Mr. Barnes. We’re at work. No home conversations at the office,” Y/N said, taking another bite. “But that’s good I know her name now.”
Bucky blinked, his jaw tight as he glared at her. “Okay, you’ve made your point. I haven’t told you much about her because I didn’t feel like it was my place. But she’s the only family I have left, and I want the two most important women in my life to know each other.” Y/N glanced at him at those words, seeing how serious he was. She didn’t say anything, and his frown deepened. “So you’ll suck me off at work, but you won’t talk to me about anything personal?”
Her eyes widened at him mentioning their sexual moment weeks before late at night in his office. She glared back at him before standing up. “Don’t be an asshole. You’re the one who said work is work, and home is home. I was just following orders, boss.” She turned to walk toward the stairwell door, opening the door then slamming it shut behind her. She marched back into Bucky’s office, grabbing her things before going back up to the front. Bucky was just walking back in as she came out. “Kamala, I’m not feeling well. I’ll forward Mr. Barnes’ meeting schedule to you so you’re aware of who is coming in and when for today,” Y/N said, tapping the counter to Kamala’s desk.
“Oh, I’m sorry, well get feeling better!” Kamala said, giving her a sad look.
“Thank you,” Y/N said. She gave Bucky a hard look before walking back out of the reception area to the elevators. Bucky was right on her heels.
“So now you’re just running away?” Bucky accused when she pushed the button for the elevator.
“No, I’m taking some time to collect myself,” Y/N said, keeping her tone as professional as possible.
“Y/N–” “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all,” Y/N retorted as the doors opened for the elevator. She stepped inside and pushed the main level floor button.
“How are you going to get home?” Bucky asked, holding the door open with his hand.
“I’m not going home,” Y/N said quietly.
Bucky’s face twisted from frustration to sadness. “Doll–”
“Don’t,” Y/N said, reaching up and moving his hand away. The doors closed on him, his sad eyes haunting her. Y/N gritted her teeth as the elevator moved down, literally biting back tears. When the doors opened she left the building, ordering an Uber. She had given up her apartment months ago after the whole debacle with her ex-boyfriend stalking her, so she had nowhere else to go. But that didn’t matter. The Uber brought her to Bucky’s house, where she ran in and packed a light, weekend bag before getting back in and was later dropped off at a nice hotel. Now seemed as good a time as any for a short vacation.
***
Later that night as she was cuddled in bed in her bathrobe, finishing her last bit of room service dinner, a call came to her room phone. Y/N frowned at the phone, waiting until the second ring before reaching over and grabbing it. “Hello?”
“Hello, Miss Y/L/N? This is Gwen, one of the front desk receptionists?”
“Uh, yes, how can I help you?”
“There’s a man here who says he’s here to see you. James Barnes?”
Y/N rolled her eyes. Of course he knew where she was. She had forgotten that her location was still enabled on the work phone, sitting right next to her on the nightstand. “Yeah, you can send him up,” she sighed.
“Okay, thank you.”
Y/N shifted herself up and out of the bed, annoyed at having to move from her comfortable position. She adjusted her robe and paused the show she was watching on the TV when she heard a knock on her door. She took a deep breath to steady her thundering heart as she walked over, unlocked the door and opened it. Bucky stood there in casual clothes and holding a backpack, a sad expression on his face as his gaze met hers.
They stood staring at each other for a long moment. Bucky swallowed harshly, then took a step toward her. “Doll,” he started. Y/N inhaled deeply. “Can I come in?”
She paused for a moment then nodded, stepping back to give him room to walk in. Bucky gave her a small smile and walked around her into the room. Y/N closed the door and followed him inside. He stood waiting for her, and as she sat back down on the bed she gestured for him to sit on the chair across from her at the sitting area. He quickly sat down, leaning on his elbows against his knees. Y/N didn’t know what to say, so she just waited. Bucky gnawed on his lower lip before sighing.
“I’m sorry, doll,” he said quietly. “I’ve been thinking about it all day, and…I shouldn’t have gotten angry or defensive over it. Meeting family is a big step, so I understand why you would be worried or stressed. I meant what I said, though. You and Becca are the most important people in my life. I just thought that maybe, since things with us have been getting pretty serious, that it was time to introduce you to her.”
Y/N nodded, looking down at her hands. “I’m sorry, too. I just panicked. You’ve given me no reason to be worried or stressed about it, I just…I don’t know.” She shook her head, upset with herself. “And then I freaked out and ran away. I don’t know how to do this whole healthy communication thing. I’ve never experienced it before.”
Bucky stood and walked to the bed, sitting next to her. He slowly reached a hand out and gently grasped her hand closest to him. “It’s gonna take practice, for both of us. And we’re going to mess up sometimes, like today. But I, I love you,” he said, squeezing her hand. “I don’t want to lose you over something that we can fix. So…can we just try this again?”
Y/N smiled. “Yeah.”
Buck smiled at her. “Okay. So, I was thinking about inviting my sister to Sunday brunch at that bottomless mimosa place you love. Would you be okay with that?”
Y/N squinted her eyes teasingly. “So…officially meeting the family? That’s kind of a big step, don’t you think?”
Bucky huffed a laugh. “Yeah, it is. But it’s a step I wanna take with you.”
Y/N’s cheeks were starting to hurt with how hard she was smiling. “Okay,” she agreed.
He smiled brightly back at her. “Awesome. You’re gonna love her. Her name is Becca. She’s older than me by two years. Very smart and artistic. She designed my house, you know?” He joked, winking at her.
“She did?” Y/N joked back. “Wow. And she must be really pretty if she looks anything like you.”
Bucky blushed at the compliment. “You tryna sweeten me up?” he smirked.
“Maybe a little bit,” Y/N said, turning to face him more. She lifted her free hand and traced it up his arm holding her other hand to his shoulder then across his chest. “I love you,” she said quietly, leaning over and kissing his shoulder.
Bucky smiled softly at her. “I love you, doll.”
She glanced at the backpack he brought. “Did you pack up some stuff just in case I let you stay?”
“Yep,” Bucky said shamelessly. “I can’t really sleep without you.” He suddenly pushed her back onto the bed and tucked her into his side. “Thank you for agreeing to meet her.”
Y/N smiled. “I’m sure it’ll be great.”
#marvel#bucky barnes#bucky barnes oneshot#oneshot#part 3#fluff#bucky barnes x reader#request#ask#anon ask
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Ok. Shit.
I get the feeling I'm not gonna sleep tonight, and who knows, I might regret this tomorrow but I need to get some thoughts out.
I've tried to retain this idea that most people are inherently good. Some of this is the remnants of whatever religious faith I was brought up in, and some of it is just what I tell myself to stay sane. It's getting harder to think that way, but I am trying to hold on to it.
There's this image I keep replaying in my head. My dad and I were visiting family down south shortly after he had wrapped up his cancer treatment. We stopped by my aunt's house in South Carolina, and she told me with tears in her eyes about how she had started gardening again after my dad's diagnosis. There was a Trump flag flying from her roof.
On another visit to the same family members, we were visiting a college and walked by a gender neutral bathroom. My uncle made some off-color joke about it and then quickly moved on when nobody laughed. My sister (a sort of closeted trans woman) looked at me with an expression of both deep sadness, and whatever face you make when you watch a bird fly head-first into a window.
My point is, I know these people aren't filled with hatred and malice. It's not constructive to waste your energy hating them when their greatest sin is ignorance.
I barely remember the Obergerfell decision, but I remember being in middle school around the time it happened. Attitudes towards queer people weren't great, but they changed so rapidly that I barely noticed. Maybe the fact that this was when I realized I was queer gave me a false sense of security when it came to the "moral arc of the universe", or maybe it's the example I have to hold onto about how fast things can change.
It's easy for people to fall into patterns of hate when they lack exposure, and the media landscape right now is making easier to avoid that sort of exposure. The basis of the fight against extremism is education, and I think it has to also be compassion.
Don't get me wrong, I also have family that are more than likely not worth the effort ("they" control the weather and all that), but those aren't most people. Most people are exhausted by politics. They see the price of groceries and vote for the other guy regardless of who's name is on the ballot. Or they're like a classmate of mine, who didn't really like either candidate and was having trouble just voting for the "better" one.
If anything, I guess this is a reminder to myself to hold on to empathy despite everything. It's fine to feel angry. Hell, it's probably good if it gets you moving. But we cannot respond to dehumanization with more dehumanization.
I'm not really all that religious anymore, but I hold on to some things. One of them is this: All things, by virtue of being crafted by God's hands, have value. Or, as my dad said it "God don't make no shit". This goes for yourself, as well as everyone else. I can't let myself lose that right now.
I don't want to belabor my point too much, but I do want to say that I saw people saying things like "it's all over if trump wins". I'm not going to lie, it's bad and people are going to get hurt and die because of this. America was waiting for the results of it's biopsy and we found out it's cancer... but we're not dead yet. I don't have a specific action I can advocate for, but please, don't give up. Authoritarianism is a longstanding wound on this country and it festers in apathy.
Take a deep breath. Regardless of what happens, time moves forward and the sun will rise in the morning. I am going to go to work, make some dinner, and hopefully find some way to work volunteering into my schedule.
Recommended listening if you want to cry right now
#oooookay we're doing this again#us politics#I have to project confidence otherwise the terror really sets in#I am very worried about my sister#but I have to find somewhere productive to put my anger otherwise im just going to scream at clouds for the rest of my life
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[31]
m.list
“I’m having so much fun!”
You exclaimed as you walked side by side, Kageyama. He smiles at you with a nod. “It’s very fun.” You smile even more. “It’s nice getting to know your friends. They’re all very funny and cool.”
“We know!” Tanaka and Noya shout from the front. Kageyama pouts, “They’re not that interesting." “Jealous?” Hinata pokes his back while Yachi snorts. Kageyama turns red and turns around to smack Hinatas head. “Shut up!” You laugh and put a hand on his arm to prevent him from hitting Hinata even further.
While that’s happening, Yamaguchi and Tsukishima were trailing behind. Yamaguchi walked a bit further from his friend. Tsukishima, finally, gains the courage to ask, “Is something wrong?” Yamaguchi doesn’t respond. Tsukishima scratches his neck. He isn’t good with words; he knows that, but this is Yamaguchi, his best friend since childhood.
Tsukishima takes notice of the distance between the two and the rest before saying what he wanted to say for so long. “Yamaguchi…” He gulps, “Why’re you mad at me?” Yamaguchi stops walking, and so does he. The group doesn’t notice and continues to chat like nothing happened.
“What makes you think that?” “Don’t pull my leg, Yamaguchi.” Yamaguchi looks at him with a frown before facing back forward. “You’re annoying.” Tsukishima raises a brow in shock. “What?” “This whole time with Kageyama, you’ve been such a downer!” “Uh…what?”
Yamaguchi furiously turns his full body to him. “I mean, you’re acting like a piece of shit!” “Uh-“ “First, you drag me away from cleaning duty, and I got in trouble with the coach for it!” “I told you, you could’ve said no! Are you really petty over that?!” “I’m not petty!” Yamaguchi puffs up his cheeks.
“It’s because I realized how much of a blunt guy you are. I mean, I know you’re kind of dry, but you’re so... Tsukishima shrugs, which angers Yamaguchi more. “That!” He points at him. “You don’t care! Your whole “face reality” act pisses me off! Can’t you act like a good friend to Kageyama for once in your life?!”
Tsukishima looks around in utter confusion. “What’s the convenience store incident got to correlate with Kageyama?! I think you’re overreacting." “Shut up, Tsukki!” The blonde jumps a little. “I didn’t want Yn to have a bad time because of my disappointment in you, but you completely ruined my mood.” Yamaguchi looks down. “But, unlike you, I actually have the decency to know when or when not to act like a complete jerk.”
He looks back up with his nose scrunched. Tsukishima holds the bottom of his shirt, looking down. “I’m…sorry…” Yamaguchi's lips falter. “I didn’t know this was a big deal to you." Yamaguchi glances to the side. “It’s fine. Not like I cried over it or anything.” “Did you…?” “No!”
Yamaguchi sighs, “I’m not that much of a crybaby.” “You used to be.” Yamaguchi furrows his brows, and Tsukishima rubs his neck. “Sorry…” “It’s fine.” Yamaguchi smiles a little. “Maybe I was overreacting, but I really was hurt by how pessimistic you were." “Sorry…”
Suddenly, Yamaguchi laughs, “Look who’s saying sorry now!” Tsukishima blinks before letting out a chuckle. “Right.” The two look into each other’s eyes with fond smiles. "I'll...try to not be an asshole to Kageyama.” “That’s a start!” He pats his shoulder, then faces back forward. “Ah crap! They definitely left us behind!” He whines upon seeing that his friends have now turned into little specks.
Tsukishima begins to walk ahead while Yamaguchi moped behind him. “I’d rather spend my time with you than those guys.” Yamaguchi rolls his eyes and pinches the blondes side. He yells and rubs the area. “Don’t be rude.” “Okay, okay..” They speed up the pace to catch up to the others, with you being the only one to point out they have disappeared.
I HVAE 2 INBOX RESPONSES BUT I CANT SEE THEM TUMBLR WTF WHY DO YOU HATE MEEE
erm it’s raining hard as balls rn..
I think yamaguchi should’ve kicked tsukkis balls idk 😬😬😬😬
@karma-gisa @cosmiicdust @abcdefghijklmzopqrstuvwxyz @writing-for-the-hell-of-it @xmagik @tnazips @zhochikennugget @makkir0ll @asp7n @hrkdlsjz @lucky-chars @azharyy @gigiiiiislife @ahnneyong @rouzuchan @bakarinnie @djmoyolehuani @rinheartshyunlix @weirdowithaphone @luvvmae @diorzs @stefnarda @ilovecandys2010 @samvagejkflxhrt @fishrene @goldenchildee @empress-pug-pug @muskratlove @krak-jj @romyoia @yukii-1 @lovingvi @muyyie @asher-muffin @drvgsndior @tired-jaz @loveelylacey @yumiaur @vrxouei @fictionalmenarehot @zazathezaer @littlekohai77 @judithregulus @eccedentesiast-sapphic
#kageyama smau#kageyama tobio x you#tobio x reader#kageyama tobio x reader#tobio kageyama x reader#hq tobio#kageyama tobio#haikyuu tobio#haikyuu kageyama#kageyama#hq kageyama#kageyama x reader#hq shoyo#hinata shoyo#hinata shoyuo#hinata shouyou#haikyuu shoyo#haikyuu tsukki#haikyuu tsukishima#hq tsukki#tsukishima kei#hq yamaguchi#haikyuu yamaguchi#yamaguchi tadashi#yachi hitoka#haikyuu yachi#tanaka ryuunosuke#hq nishinoya#nishinoya yū#haikyuu
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((He's such a bitch. I love it 😫))
Lucifer didn't even get the chance to tell Lilith that A was Adam. Fucking Adam. He didn't get much further than telling her about the extermination and his counter offer.
Lucifer knew he was in trouble when Lilith glared at him, she was holding little Charlie, so she said nothing. But after putting her to sleep, she went off. Lucifer was sure half of Hell could hear her.
Lucifer: Lilly, I had to! It was non-negotiable! I was only barely able to spare Hellborn and our family-!
Lilith: So you've thrown our people to the fucking dogs?! You're allowing bloodthirsty angels to come down here and butcher our people!? Like their nothing!?
Lucifer: They are nothing! I gave them the gift of free will and look at what they've done with it!
Lilith: You- fucking angels. That's the point of free will. More than half of these sinners don't deserve to be here. Like we don't. Or, we did. Seeing as we slotted into the roles that Heaven demanded of us!
Lucifer: What are you talking about?!
Lilith: YOU became the Devil! In every sense of the damn word! The only reason you stopped torturing sinners was because there were too many!
Lucifer: I-I had to! I didn't want to!
Lilith: So, where's that free will, Lucifer?! That thing we fought so hard for? We went from one jail cell to another! I wanted freedom, damnit! Not to be caged again! And now, you've sentenced our people to whatever the fuck this is! Extermination day!? Are you insane!? These are souls! Human souls!
Lucifer: Their Adam and Eve's decents- we should want them to die!
Lilith: It doesn't matter. Their not Adam. Their not Eve. Their people. Souls. Human souls-!
((Tw: physical abuse))
Lucifer: Humans were always a damn mistake! I did what was needed! There was no saying no- I made it so it benefited us-!
Lucifer stumbled backwards as a blunt force pain radiated through his jaw.
Lilith was stating down at him with so much hatred that it burned hotter than the fires of Hell. He cupped his jaw, feeling a trickle of golden blood run down his lip.
Lilith: ...humans were a mistake? Do you even remember who you're fucking talking to!? Do you know who I fucking am-!?
Lucifer: It's Adam.
Lilith: ...excuse me?
Lucifer: A... it's Adam.
Lilith: ... how dare you mention that pigs name in my presence. No wonder why you didn't fight back. You've always had a soft spot for him, even after everything he did to me.
Lucifer: You know that's not true! I hate him just as much-!
Lilith: Do you!? I don't care who A is anymore! I'm not wasting anymore time with Heaven. I will fight for our people, if you won't. You will attend the meetings from now on.
Lucifer started panicking as Lilith walked off.
Lucifer: Lily- please!
Lilith: Stay away from me, Lucifer. And stay away from Charlie.
Lucifer looked down. He didn't see the big deal, their sinners, not Hellborn. Why should they matter? They made their choice.
Now, instead of every one hundred years, a meeting will take place two days after each extermination. Lucifer didn't look forward to see Adam again.
I'm coming up with some aus for you, but I need some meeting shenanigans.
I would love to know what bullshit Adam and Lucifer got up to during meetings.
Slowly healing their relationship, one meeting at a time 👀
Well I think the very first one they wouldn't even be alone together because of what happened. I think Adam would just silently glare at him.
Over time when Adam was feeling more confident to face the devil he'd go alone but by hologram, Sera's idea.
Making snide remarks, snappy comments, and being sassy.
And Lucifer would come back with his own and they would end up in banter for a while other than why they are really there.
As more time passes it's less hateful and more playful, maybe even takes on a flirty edge.
And I always see Lucifer being the one to make the first move after what happened in Eden. Adam has so many insecurities he wouldn't think that Lucifer would want him as more than maybe a friend.
Hit me with them bud 👀
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You doing ok?
hi
#i'm alive. simply being chewed upon by multiple things#work is more stressful than i'd like it to be. for instance i'm hoping that i submitted my time off notification for tomorrow correctly#because otherwise it might read as a no call no show and i would . like to continue having a job#now to be fair. i do have it on the system that i requested it at the beginning of the month and i emailed my supervisor about it last week#so even if i didn't submit it correctly i'm likely in the clear#but nonetheless. i also got a firm talking-to the other day and now i am on ✨thin ice✨ for dicking around too much#because they track ur idle time at my work (computer) and mine was Quite High so my supervisor was like man what the hell is this#but even though she was kind of baffled at me spending so much time dicking around#she couldn't even really be all that mad in the end because i'm still doing good numbers and have made no (zero) mistakes#so she was just like. it's kind of impressive that your numbers look this good when you literally have 50% idle time#so she goes imagine what you could do if you weren't wasting so much time#and yeah i can whip out some Really Good Numbrers when i put the effort in.#so the problem is not my numbers it's just that i'm not spending long enough doing my tasks for the day#but i don't want to drag out those tasks intentionally so i've just been upping my own standards/goals#as much as i hate giving any more of my brain power than is necessary to giant corporations#it's still easy to feel smug after you get Talked To and then immediately turn around and show off#like yeah i coulda been doing this good the whole time. literally pulling up by 20 points. i just didn't want to.#trying to keep everyone's expectations low but accidentally toed the line of um. not working enough to keep my job#...anyway. EAS national weather system issued a . hi#i haven't forgotten about all of you i'm just having trouble tracking all my shit that i got going on ✨ yaaaaaaay#im gonna post things on AO3 soon. i promise. my weakness is that i get sidetracked trying to unwind from work#...i know i said 'soon' last time. but this time for real#asks#not sexy#anonymous
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really really hate how my brothers make fun of me for being mentally ill . not great!!
#THEYVE BEEN DOING IT SINCE I CAN FUCKING REMEMBER#THEY BOTH PURPOSELY DO THINGS TO ANNOY ME AND I GET IN TROUBLE WHEN I DO SOMETHING BACK#NOT TO MENTION HOW MY YOUNGER BROTHER WILL JUST FUCKING. LIE#AND I CANT TELL WHEN HE DOES THAT SO I IGNORE HIM AND#EVERYTHING IS MY FAULT ??#IM SORRY IM LIKE THIS#ITS NOT MY FAULT STOP FUCKING MAKING FUN OF ME#AAAHH#I HATE THEM SO MUCH#I WOULD NOT CARE IF THEY BOTH DIED. LIKE ACTUALLY IT WOULD BE SO MUCH BETTER FOR ME#THEY DO SO MUCH THERES SO MUCH MORE THAN THIS#I FUCKING HATE THEM#ITS !! NOT!! MY FAULT IM LIKE THIS !!!!#FUCKING LEAVE ME ALONE!!#IM SORRY !!!!!!#rambling#kinda vent#actually im just screaming at this point
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god help me i'm going insane about dickson xenoblade again
#this is what i get for thinking about lord of the rings too hard this week (specifically denethor / gríma / saruman and the like)#thinking about the way anthony may delivered “when will you learn you HAVE no future?”#he thinks shulk is fully DEAD at that point. he thinks HE killed him. which he very much meant to. but now that the kid is no longer there#now that the terrible future he's been preparing for and actively working to bring about has in fact come about#i don't know that dickson really cared anymore. he played his part he did the deed expected and he did it unquestioningly. So What Now?#well. now nothing. now the world that he spent so long biding his time in; so long getting enmeshed in (even for nefarious purposes)#is about to end; is about to be gone forever.#sure zanza will probably just create another world and maybe he (dickson) will have Even More Power in the new one#(though that's not a given! he doesn't know for SURE his lord and god will keep his promise!)#but like. what the hell does he care at this point#dickson SAYS he wants power but i suspect that long long ago what the giant dickson really wanted was SURVIVAL.#we never get to know just how he became a disciple or what the giant civilization looked like in its heyday or how it ended#but in MY headcanon dickson saw that some kind of destruction coming and he wanted Out#and maybe he hated his peers and figured any power and prestige that came from this bargain was just a bonus#i think he thought of himself as a saruman type: powerful; remote; far above the petty troubles of mortals (even the long-lived high entia)#but i have always headcanoned that by his later days (i.e. when he started engaging w/colony 9; machina village; etc. in earnest)#he committed too hard to the bit and started “going native” as it were; started to give a shit in ways that he would never dare admit#maybe not as much of a shit as; you know; a regular guy would. but more than an immortal disciple and horseman of the apocalypse should.#and all the time knowing that all the world he'd seen would soon be gone#maybe everyone else can get fucked. but shulk had to die too. and that's what their god MADE them to do.#he can't allow himself to care or to hope for another option bc in his mind it's already over; decided; that's it#what else can you do in the face of ultimate power but bow to it and take whatever scraps may fall to an obedient servant?#“you have no future” nor does he except that shulk came back. except that the peoples of bionis/mechonis just wouldn't accept Fate.#and in some final rebellious corner of his mind he starts putting eggs in shulk's basket. “if they can't even defeat telethia they won't#stand a chance against me (or zanza)” so let's see if they CAN. oh they did? how about a dragon? oh fuck they defeated the dragon too?#well fuck. maybe there WAS another option all along. but will/can they stand against me; the final disciple? oh they can??#guess i'll die then bc i'm not looking THAT in the face. i am NOT unpacking my cowardice/failure/lack of vision after all these years.#good luck with that tho <3 you're welcome for the training btw. where i'm going i don't have to see your trauma assuming you live that long.#dickson#xenoblade
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the strangest thing of 2022 is that in the final weeks of it i have started to partake in the slow realization that i am actually someone loved, someone who matters to those who matter to me, and i am allowed to smile and accept that love without insisting i am not someone worthy of having it.
#i don't think i'm at a point where i don't feel the need to say 'i'm afraid you won't like me when you are near me' yet#but there's this sense of comforting weight that's never been there before#like my purpose here is not just to love but to be loved too#and it sounds so simple but it feels so. much. it just feels like a lot to me.#when i thought about dying before i always concluded that my death would just cause more trouble than i was worth for others#and i hate causing trouble so i would be safe or whatever to avoid it#now i think about dying and realize that it would make my little family sad#and that they get sick with worry over the thought of me doing something and getting hurt#and i think about them and their worry and their love when i go to leave the house in a t-shirt and thin hoodie#and i stop to go put on my coat#even though i hate coats#because someone loves me enough to want me to be warm and wear my coat so i don't get sick#and that's enough
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At least I could disable the suggestions but just... I'm sick of it, I'm sick of companies trying to think for me
I'd rather be miserable but doing shit my own way than placid and glass eyed and just taking whatever companies tell me to
Like... literally just asking what I get out of writing a post on tumblr... zero suggestions, just letting me say whatever dumb stuff comes to my head
#the problem is that doing things my way is actually working well; it's just really slow and it's coming from a bad starting point#everything that makes me miserable was even more miserable growing up#you maybe see me and think that I'm doing really horribly; and that may be true; but I'm also truthfully at my peak right now#and frankly as much as I worry about it A LOT; I'm kinda still on the rise in a lot of ways#...I just take way too long to do things; I want to be quicker because a lot of this stuff isn't... it's not being slow and steady#it's being depressed and having trouble working on shit#but... when I do stuff my way the end result tends to be strong#I got a house in 2019 for instance... like in that economy; I feel like that counts as a pretty high roll outcome; you know?#the parts of my life I hate are all... it's like Marley in the Christmas Carol; I've got all these chains around me#and... about 80% of those chains are just my mom or my mom's choices... she blows through so much money all the time#it makes me want to die#but all that shit... it's the past haunting me and drowning me#but shit's better than it was and... I have more friends now that I did in the past; I'm closer to making money than I've been in the past#(part of it is that I kinda want to get shit stabilized in the household; be doing stuff like cooking before I try and sell shit)#(also understand that everyone in high school liked me... we just never saw each other outside of school)#(so it was a situation where I had 'friends'; by that standard everyone at school was a friend)#(but I didn't have a single person I was close with and I was totally isolated in a crowd)#(friend is just a word in english that has to cover a really really wide range of relationships)#(but these days I do have actual friends... just a shame none of us live in the same town... or even state; you know?)#(I like all the people I went to high school with; they all cared a lot and were very bad at it)#(couldn't figure out that like... just give me some company; that's a good 80% of what I'm lacking)#(...I think part of it was they were all stoners and I wasn't; so they felt like... eh... like something something)#(and when I say all stoners I mean... I think... easily 80% of the school; probably 90% and maybe higher were all stoners)#(it uh... was not an easy thing for the staff; cause they obviously all knew; but... figuring out how to best handle it)#(like hell; I wouldn't want to deal with that)#(also like 95% were smokers... you have to understand that most of these kids were rich kids)#(off the top of my head I can only think of 2 other kids who were poor... just... uh...)#(if I named the city the school was in; you'd probably be like 'oh... makes sense')#(I liked everyone there; everyone liked me... just... they were very bad at just basic stuff like spending time together)#(eh... you don't need to hear more)
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There’s something I love love loveeee about Laios and how badly he wants to be cool.
Let me preface with this: in general, I believe the harder you try to be cool, the less cool you actually are. The less you care what people think about you, if you’re “cringe” or “weird”, the more likely people will perceive you as confident and self-assured.
There are countless pieces of media where characters try to fit in with some group, change every part of themself to look/act like what they’re “supposed” to be, and end up miserable, often realizing the people they’re trying to impress aren’t worth the trouble.
I’ve experienced this in my own life too! Sometimes when I go out I wear a rainbow propeller cap! Cause I think it’s funny and silly and!! I ALWAYS get compliments!! I don’t wear it to be cool, I wear it because it makes me happy. And people overall have a positive reaction to it. it’s a huge contrast to when I was teenager and didn’t really put as much of myself into my appearance/wardrobe, and barely left any kind of impression on people.
So anyway, let’s get into it.
Laios… he’s been hurt so badly by people. He resented humanity for it. And yet, he still yearns for the approval of others. He wants FRIENDS!!!! and was angry and frustrated to learn his perception of his relationship with Shuro was so drastically different than Shuro’s!!!!
He KNEW that people were put-off by his love of monsters. Up until Falin got eaten, he deliberately suppressed how much he talked about it with others. He probably thought by not talking about monsters so much, it was working!! He was doing all the Right Things now! So Shuro confessing he always hated him was a huge blow.
But the reality is, he loves monsters. And most importantly, he loves cool monsters. He fantasizes about what would make the Ultimate Monster.
He feels very strongly about what he considers “cool” as well. He finds all aspects of monsters fascinating, but can still be HORRIBLY underwhelmed when they look too lame for his tastes.
He knows most people don’t feel the same way he does. He knows his “cool” is everyone else’s “weird”. It’s so tragically sweet how he latches onto Kabru the moment he shows interest in monsters, and takes every opportunity to infodump about them to him.
He wants people to find monsters as cool as he does!! But, he also wants people to think he’s as cool as he finds monsters.
Like!!! djkfghadkfjg IT DOESN'T EVEN BOTHER HIM WHEN PEOPLE HAVE A WRONG IMPRESSION OF HIM! He's FLATTERED by it. It's almost like, at this point, it doesn't matter to him if people don't like him. People can not like him and still think he's cool.
And my favorite thing is, it works. Laios IS cool as fuck. You KNOW he thought he looked so badass when he did this and he was RIGHT:
And yet, this is him trying very hard to look cool. But it's Laios's version of cool. It's almost contradictory, in that sense. Cause he knows people still don't get it. Like. He wants to be cool. He doesn't care about the "normal" ways to be cool. He thinks his cringe thing is cool. He does his cringe thing, that people very much do still think is cringe. So you would think that, since he wants people to think he's cool, he would not do the cringe thing. But he wore the pelt because he thought it was cool. And people clapped and cheered for him anyway.
is what he's doing really so different than this? ^
YAYYYYY WOOO GO LAIOS YOURE SO COOL!!!!!!!
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#long post#photos#laios touden#I LIKE HIM A LOT!!!!!! HES SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER!!!!!
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It comes as somewhat a surprise when the others realize that something has obviously happened between their resident Lieutenant and Private, as she’s quick to fall silent whenever he appears, and even more so make herself scare when she can when he’s around. It’s only the third time that Soap sees it that he says something, because if he doesn’t no one else will, and where’s the fun in that?
He watches her duck her head and leave the break room, Gaz, Soap, Price, and Ghost sitting alone at the breakfast table conversing over soggy cereal and cooling tea; Soap pushes a piece of bacon on his plate and asks, “Trouble in paradise, Lt?” the corner of his mouth arches with a slight grin when he hears the warning grunt come from Ghost.
“No.”
“Seems like it,” he retorts, taking a sip of his coffee. “What’d ya do? Tell her ta fuck off?”
“Drop it, MacTavish,” Ghost warns darkly. “Nothing’s wrong.”
This time, Gaz jumps in. “C’mon, Lt., it’s obvious that something’s wrong. I mean, she won’t even look at you, let alone say anything unless you speak first.”
“An’ she’s callin’ ‘im ‘sir.’” Soap adds, pointing at him. “Christ, Lt., ya musta done a number on ‘er. Poor Puffin. So sweet and kind. Broke ‘er heart ya did.”
Price can tell that Ghost is close to snapping at the both of them but gets to it before he does. “Soap, Gaz, go catalogue our inventory for the mission next week.”
“Aw, but we already d—” Soap falls silent when Price shoots him a look and quietly grumbles to himself as he grabs his plate and cup, Gaz following in suit.
It’s only until the two soldiers are alone that Price asks, “What did happen, Simon?”
Ghost lets out a long sigh and rolls his head back, staring at the ceiling. “Pretty much told ‘er to fuck off.”
Price watches quietly as Ghost begins rattling to himself—he’s never really had to ask the man to explain himself. All he’s gotta do is prompt him to do so and Ghost does the rest.
“I just got mad. She’s always ‘round and practically up my arse, and I got caught up and instead of ‘andlin’ it properly, I shoved my fucking foot in my mouth and scalped her.” He rubs a hand over his face. “I meant to be gentler but once I started, I couldn’t stop. It just kept comin’ out. And now she fuckin’ hates me.”
He pulls his hand down and looks up at Price with a scowl—the man is smiling at him, but it’s that stupid smile that means more than Ghost wants to admit it does.
“Quit that.”
“You care about her,” Price murmurs, rubbing his chin thoughtfully, though his admonish is still harsh. “And instead of telling her how you felt like a grown adult, you took the ten-year-old way out and decided to be a cunt to her.”
“I didn’t mean to be such a cunt.”
“But the fact of the matter is that you did, and you’ve screwed up team fluidity and cohesion.” He looks at him. “You know a team divided—”
“Can’t stand,” Ghost finishes with an even worse scowl. “Yeah, yeah, I know.” He looks away. “I just don’t know how to even start tryin’ to fix it.”
“Well, apologizing might be a good start,” Price rumbles with a grin. “She’s a good kid, Simon. Her heart’s in the right place, even if it’s a bit much at times. Shows she cares. More than most do in our line of work. She’s a rare one.”
“I know,” he admits in a much, much softer tone. “I just don’t want her to lose that doin’ this.” His eyes meet Price’s, and they hold such a misery. “Look at us, Price,” he mutters, gesturing between them. “Middle age, unmarried, no kids, too fucked up for anything like that. She doesn’t…” he clenches his jaw. “She deserves a better path, a safer path, than this life. She deserves to go out and have a life where she comes home to a family.”
“That’s not your choice to make, son,” he replies gently, but there’s a firmness to it. “If this is what she wants to do, then she will. We can’t make her get out of service.”
Ghost growls low in his throat. “She has so much more potential than being cannon fodder. She could do somethin’ with her life. Somethin’ good. Somethin’ that won’t have her dying face down in the sand with a bullet wound in the back.”
Price simply watches him.
“But she’s so fuckin’ stupid. She wants to be here. She wants to spend whatever time she has dodgin’ bullets and wakin’ up every night in sweat ‘cause she can’t escape the dreams. No one wants to do this. We don’t want to do this. We do this because we have to. But her? She’s happy here.” He lowers his voice, it’s as if he’s in disbelief. “She’s happy here.” He looks at Price. “Why? Why is she so happy here?”
It's another long moment before Price speaks.
“You hear, son, but you don’t listen.” He moves the cup on the saucer. “She bounced around homes growing up, scraped by on the skin of her teeth. She has no one. But here, she has something. She has people who care for her, if nothing else, they won’t let her die alone.”
“Oh what? So, it’s found family bullshit?” Ghost spits. “If she dies, at least the team would mourn her?”
“Isn’t that what you’ve done too?” he replies, and Ghost falls silent. “People like Gaz, Soap, and myself are different than you and she are, Simon. We have homes. We’ve had families that have loved us, that do love us. But you two? Simon, you’ve made a home where you’ve had to. Made a family out of people you’ve bled for, would gladly bleed for. You’ve made something that’s yours. You made a family for yourself. And so did she. She’s made us her family. The one she never had the privilege to call her own.”
Price lets out a quiet hum, and pats his thighs, standing up and pushing his chair in.
“Think on what I’ve said, son. And if nothing else, apologize and leave it at that. Put the ball in her court and let her make the next move.”
As he walks off, he hears, “And if she doesn’t want it?”
He tosses a knowing look over his shoulder. “I’m sure she’ll take it.” His eyes twinkle as he adds, “Takes an awful strong woman to care about a man like you.”
#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x reader imagines#simon ghost riley x reader imagine#simon ghost riley imagines#simon ghost riley imagine#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#simon riley x reader imagines#simon riley x reader imagine#simon riley imagines#simon riley imagine#simon riley#ghost x reader#ghost x reader imagines#ghost x reader imagine#ghost imagines#ghost imagine#ghost#cod#cod imagines#cod imagine#captain price#price#john soap mactavish#soap#john mactavish#kyle gaz garrick#gaz#kyle garrick
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snapdragons mean i'm sorry
summary: you own a flower shop down the street from Wade and Althea, and now Logan's apartment. You and Logan had grown quite close, until you hear him complaining about you through the door. A week later, he shows up at the shop, groveling wc: 2.0 k a/n: sorry about the delay with this one, things have been a bit crazy! I really enjoyed writing for worst!Logan, I think I'm considering a part two for this as well. This fic is based on this request! warnings: lots of hurt and comfort, reader uses she/her pronouns, confused and groveling Logan, Wade being a meddler, slight spoilers for the end of Deadpool and Wolverine
You were two seconds away from chucking the bouquet that you were working on clear across the room. Instead, you gently set the flowers down on your workbench and tightened your pony tail. Heaving a sigh, you snatched the broom out of it’s place leaning up against the doorway and made you way to the front of store.
Usually, being surrounded by all of your flowers and specially curated knickknacks brought you a sense of peace. But so far today you’d broken two vases and stabbed your thumb on rose thorns maybe more than you’d ever done in your entire life.
Being friends with a superhero (singular) was much less stressful than you’d thought it would be. Wade would stop in to the shop around once a week to buy flowers for Vanessa, always with a quick joke or two before being on his way. It wasn’t until he’d saved you from an attempted mugging a few years back that you’d really become close. And you’d been there for a lot. Through his break up with Vanessa, when he was nonstop moaning about how deeply he hated selling lightly used cars, and whenever he needed a second opinion about a new hair system he was perched on a second stool that now had permanent residence behind the counter, right next to yours.
Being friends with superheroes (plural) was bringing a new host of issues. Namely, an accelerated heart rate and trouble forming your words in front of Wade’s new roommate. Wade had warned you that his new acquisition was prickly when he’d stopped over to invite you to the Welcome Home Pizza Party Palooza, according to the hand drawn invitation he’d proudly presented you. He’d lured you in with promises of meeting his new dog before dropping the bomb that there was an introduction to his roommate included in the package deal. You’d already agreed, and Wade was too busy rambling about how you were being moved up to from side character status for you to intercede with a made up reason you could no longer attend.
You historically didn’t do well with meeting new people, and someone who was likely to snap at you at some point throughout the evening, by Wade’s estimations, was an even bigger hurdle. Even though you had worked yourself up enough to feel slightly sick to your stomach, you’d arrived at the party, armed with flowers for the new roommate and a mini bouquet of dog treats for Mary Puppins. Wade and Al’s apartment was full of familiar faces when you’d arrived. You were caught up in a conversation with Peter and Yukio for a few minutes before they’d asked about the flowers all but forgotten in your hands. You admitted they were a welcome home present, and Peter kindly pointed out where Logan was standing across the room. You’d thanked him, and made your way across the room.
When you reached him in the kitchen, you stood quietly behind him, working up the courage to make your presence known. Ultimately, it was unnecessary, because he quickly turned around and greeted you with a crinkly-eyed smile that made your heart flutter against your better judgement. You’d shyly handed over the flowers, stuttering through the explanation of owning the shop down the street and apologizing preemptively if he didn’t like them, expecting a strong rebuttal. He certainly looked like the type of man to rebuff the offer of flowers in fear of appearing unmanly or some other nonsense. Instead, he took the flowers from you gently, thanking you. He turned away, searching through the cabinets before pulling out a novelty beer stein decorated with My Little Pony characters with a huff. Logan made quick work of depositing the bouquet in the beer stein, but he frowned at his work, clearly unhappy with the vase options. “So you’re the florist that he’s obsessed with.”
You smiled to yourself, glad to hear that Wade wasn’t only kind to your face. “Are you kidding me?” Speak of the devil. Wade slung an arm around your shoulders, depositing your typical drink of choice in your hand. “More like worship the ground you walk on. I may be Marvel Jesus but I’m your disciple. The things she can do with a chrysanthemum.” He moaned in a way you had never heard someone while talking about a flower, of all things.
Logan shook his head, but before either of you could respond, Wade noticed Vanessa coming through the door and was at her side in an instant. You’d stood with him in the kitchen for a few moments, silent but comfortable. It wasn’t long before Althea had called everyone to the table, where you took your usual seat next to Althea and Vanessa. The evening had been comfortable and you couldn’t help but notice how naturally Logan and his daughter Laura fit into your strange little family.
The next day, you’d stopped by their apartment armed with another bouquet, this one beautifully arranged in one of your favorite vases you kept in stock. You couldn’t shake the image of how disappointed Logan had looked with his options the previous night. Al had ushered you inside quickly, letting you know that the rest of the roommates had left her in the name of picking up some necessities for Logan. You’d dropped the vase on the kitchen counter, ruffled Mary Puppins’ hair and saw yourself out.
Logan had come by to thank you at the store, startling you where you were working in the back. You’d fumbled one of your vases, sending it crashing to the ground. Logan was quick to usher you onto a stool, locating a broom and making quick work of the glass. You’d insisted you could take care of it, but he’d shot your down insisting that he would heal right up if he managed to cut himself and he didn’t feel like a trip to the ER. It should have stung, but there was a lightness to his voice and a twinkle in his eyes that instead had you fighting down the hear rising to your cheeks.
After a few weeks, it was routine for you to stop by a couple nights a week after work, armed with a fresh set of flowers for the vase and some take out. Logan very well could have taken some home with him, as often as he was stopping by, but somehow you’d always get to talking and forget to bundle some up for him. He was immensely helpful around the shop, able to reach things on high shelves and move heavy pallets you would get in much more easily than you were able to. Wade’s stool had quickly become Logan’s but you didn’t much mind.
Your hand had settled on the doorknob to their apartment, when two familiar voices faded in through the closed door. It was instinct to pause, you hand’t really meant to snoop. But the words hurt all the same. “I really am fond of her, but she could really stand to let up on how often she’s hanging around me.” Your heart started to hammer, frozen in the hallway.
“I hear you peanut,” Wade was quick to respond. “Cling-ville USA, population her, amiright?”
“Fuck off, you’ve been obsessed with her as long as I’ve known you.” Your heart sunk. Isn’t that what Logan had said, the first night you met? Wade was obsessed with you? As quietly as you could, you dropped your hand from the doorknob and backed away down the hall, hoping that their conversation was loud enough to drown out the sound of your retreating footsteps. You’d retreated down the hallway, quickly shooting Wade a text that you weren’t feeling well and wouldn’t be able to make it.
You hadn’t seen them since. You knew it shouldn’t have mattered, but it stung. You’d moved their stool into the far back corner of the shop because as silly as it sounded, it made you sad to look at him. Thankfully, there had been a steady stream of customers to keep you busy for a while. But now, you were dead and your thoughts were drifting when the bell on the front door rang. You sent a silent thank you to the universe and rushed out to the front of the store. But the customer waiting for you was the only one you were reluctant to see.
You hated to admit it, but the image of Logan standing in the middle of your showroom, shoulders slumped and one of the most regretful looks you’d ever seen on anyone was almost enough for you to forgive him on sight. Close but no cigar, one could say.
“Hey, sweetheart” he said sheepishly, hands shoved into this pockets.
If this is how he was going to play it, so be it. “Hey, Lo. Where’ve you been?”
“Laura needed some help at the mansion, and they roped us into a mission. Meant to call but,” he shrugged, scratching the back of his neck. “Got a bit busy.” You nodded, doing your best to remember that you were mad at him. Stopped by for some flowers, if you have a minute.”
You nodded curtly, shocked that he wasn’t bringing up the obvious tension. He wasn’t one to beat around the bush. “What kind are you looking for?”
“Eh, whatever you think says ‘Sorry, I fucked up’ the best” he shrugged, making his way behind the counter.
“Who else did you piss off?” You asked, arranging a few more pieces of greenery into the bouquet he had requested. Even if you were frustrated and moody, you couldn’t bring yourself to make something you weren’t proud of.
“Where’s my seat sweetheart?” He asked, before taking a pause. “What do you mean who else?” He asked, cocking his head to the side.
“What do you mean ‘where’s my seat’?” You mocked, doing a poor imitation of his gruff voice.
“Okay, you’ve gotta catch me up here, sweetheart because I clearly missed something.”
“Wouldn’t wanna cling on too hard, are you sure you want me to do that?” You snarked, dropping the bouquet on the table and storming over to him, poking your finger into his chest. “I heard the both of you complaining about me last week.”
Logan’s hand wrapped around yours, drawing it closer to his chest. “I was coming in here to apologize for being gone for a week. But I’m happy to double the order to make up for the confusion. If my math is right, bub, you overheard me complaining about that fucking dog insisting on sleeping on my bed. Even after I told Wade to keep her out of my room.”
“You love her.”
“Yeah, you know me too well sweetheart.”
You smiled up at him, soaking in the warmth of having him this close, when something clicks in your head. “Are you telling me that you waltzed in here and asked me to make my own apology flowers?” If you hadn’t already decided he was off the hook, the way his mouth turned down into a little pout would have sealed the deal.
He hesitates for a few moments, eyes glancing around the shop seemingly in search of an answer. “Didn’t want to give the business to someone else.” He shrugged, bashfully.
Against your better judgement, a few giggles slipped past your lips, which had been firmly pressed together. A few more, and then you were laughing so hard you were having trouble breathing. You leaned your head against his chest, taking measured deep breaths to curve the laughter “I can’t believe this,” you gasped, wiping a few tears away that had spilled onto your cheeks. You grinned up at him through the tears, taking in the way his eyes warmed when he smiled.
“Could have been worse,” he shrugged, mischief making his eyes sparkle. “Could have gone with Wade’s suggestion.”
“I have to know.”
He slipped both his arms around you, pulling you in close. “Wanted me to jump out of a cake.”
You snuggled in close, leaning your head on his chest. “I would like to see it.”
“Then we’ll have to see what we can do about that.”
#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#wolverine#wolverine x reader#deadpool and wolverine#worst!wolverine#marvel x reader#marvel fic#Logan howlett imagine#Logan howlett fic#wolverine imagine#wolverine fic#Hugh jackman x reader#x men x reader#x men fanfic#x men fic#marvel imagine#my writing#x men#x men comics#x men movies#hugh jackman
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Intention: Write a sweet Raph and Mikey bonding fic about how Raph is bummed that Casey has been spending more time with Donnie. Result: Every cell in my body trying desperately to keep this from becoming a vent fic about how dirty the 2012 show did Raph's relationships with Casey and Slash.
#i'm just struggling on what was supposed to be a fun quick one shot guys don't mind me#this was definitely not my intent#i don't much care for vent fics#i'm generally of the mind that if you're taking the trouble to write a story just fix the problem in your story#that's what fanfiction is all about#anyone can vent but only writers can do something about it#but rather than just kind of being bittersweet this has turned into a full on angst fic and i don't know what to do#i have taken out more tangential scenes than i have scenes that have actually made it into the final version so far#i have cut entire chunks of dialogue because i was able to recognize that no the characters would not say those things#that is just me projecting onto the situation from my position outside the show#writing within canon is hard when you're writing about a point in canon you kinda hate#but this wasn't meant to be a fix it story#a fix it would take way long and be far bigger#i just wanted to write a cute one shot guys what's wrong with me send help#anyway just needed to vent for a sec about trying not to vent in my story XD#delete later
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you fall first, but he falls harder
a/n: i can only write fluff, so please trust me that it's fluff. there's like, one usage of 'she', timeskip spoilers, and a bit of language. it's my longest fic yet (which isn't saying much), no beta we die like daichi
you don't know that tsukishima kei knows about your crush on him. it's so damn obvious, how you turn red so easily when he's around. unfortunately for you, though, he doesn't reciprocate, nor does he bother confronting you about it. you are his closest friend other than yamaguchi, and as much as he hates to admit it, he doesn't want to lose you as one. it's so tedious, anyways.
---
"it's our last year in karasuno, do you have anything planned?" you ask as you lay on the floor of tsukishima's room. you're supposed to be studying, since it was what you came over to do with kei and tadashi, but you gave up somewhere halfway in geography.
"it is my last year, but who knows about you? you've been slacking so much, you'd probably have to repeat a year. and could you get up?" he sighs and nudges your side with his foot.
"asshole," you mutter, cheeks growing red. if you know that he just dodged your question, you don't do anything about it. "just you wait, i'll enroll into kyoto university and make you eat your words, beanpole."
"sure." his reply drips with sarcasm, but he doesn't doubt that you can make it far. there's a knock at the door.
"sorry for being late!"
"tadashi!!"
---
kei knows you can read him like an open book. you can tell he's having a bad day just by a conversation with him through text. he also knows that when he says that he doesn't want to talk, you immediately ring his phone.
the first time it happened, he had tried to decline your calls, or just ignore them entirely, but you're insistent. eventually he picked up, filled with pure irritation at that point.
"could you--"
"i'm heading over. i promise i won't push for any details. i'll even get strawberry shortcake on the way." you immediately stated. he paused to mull it over.
"fine, but if the cake sucks, i'm kicking you out." it's safe to say that the cake was good enough to make this a habit, so much so that tsukshima doesn't even know why you still call him to let him know you're coming over. the both of you know you will no matter what.
so here you are, sitting on his bedroom floor with him and eating desserts in silence, save for the music playing softly from his computer.
"you're gonna get in trouble with your parents when they realise you snuck out." he remarks. you shrug your shoulders, stuffing the remaining taiyaki in your mouth.
"i know."
"don't talk with your mouth full." you roll your eyes with a furious blush. somehow, you being here with him becomes sweeter than the strawberry shortcake.
---
you were there when tsukishima made the decision to go professional with volleyball.
his last match as karasuno's middle blocker had ended. his body was sore all over, but somehow the freak duo managed to convince him and yamaguchi to play one more match back at school, just the four of them with yachi. but even with landing third in nationals and a final intimate match with his teammates, he still somehow felt so unsatisfied.
the walk home with you was silent. he was grateful you didn't say anything. he couldn't handle any more questions about how he was feeling when he himself was unsure. it was when you two stepped outside the convenience store after getting ice cream did he come to the conclusion that he never wants to have a last match.
"i'm not going to give up on volleyball after graduation." he announced out of the blue. you were caught off guard for a bit, before grinning at him. "i expected that."
"why?"
"you call hinata and kageyama freaks for being so insane about volleyball, but you don't even realise that you're just as equally crazy about it as them." you said it so nonchalantly as you eat your ice cream, like you're stating a fact. now it was his turn to be taken off guard. he took a while to let it settle in before chuckling softly.
he should have known that you know him better than he does himself.
---
it's graduation day. tsukishima and kageyama are stuck with their four teary-eyed friends by their side. kei awkwardly pats your head, not knowing how to comfort you. you laugh at his feeble attempt, your rosy cheeks burning red. have you always been this cute? in the midst of all the bittersweet interactions, you get distracted by something on your phone, and let out a gasp.
"what is it, (name)?" yamaguchi asks. you're trembling slightly, and tsukishima grows worried.
"i, uh, got into kyoto university," you say in disbelief. "i actually got in!" everyone congratulates you, but you only care about one thing.
"tsukki, remember that day i told you i'd make you eat your words?" he hums in acknowledgement. you shove the acceptance email in his face, but he can only focus on how proud you look with that shit-eating smirk. "what do you have to say now, beanpole?"
he smiles. that's my best friend right there.
"nothing."
---
you were gone before the new year, and kei was handling your absence well until semester started. he had believed it'd be fine, you were only across the country, not across the world. plus, you promised you would call as often as you could.
but he doesn't sees you in his classes anymore, and you don't come over when he's having a bad day. he got himself strawberry shortcake to lighten his mood like it usually does, but he only feels hollow. it doesn't help that since he's going pro, his volleyball training is almost everyday now, and with your commitments, he rarely gets to call you anymore. it hurts like hell inside.
"hey tsukki, you've been off recently. is everything ok?" tadashi calls him one day.
"i'm fine, yamaguchi." kei lies. tadashi isn't convinced.
"does it have something to do with (name) being in kyoto?"
"why would you say that?" he answered too quickly for his liking.
"well, you bring (name) up quite a bit, and when you realise she isn't there, you get all quiet and snappy." tsukishima is about to retort back, but then it hits him.
oh shit, he's in love.
---
the day you finally return back to miyagi to visit, tsukishima waits at the station with yamaguchi. kei's eyes are constantly searching the crowd and flickering to his watch every so often.
"tsukki, relax, she'll be here soon." he ignores tadashi's reassurance.
tsukishima kei is a composed man, always able to think before he acts. but when he catches sight of you, he runs. before you can register anything, he hugs you, gripping onto you like a lifeline, like he will die if he lets go of you.
"tsukki--"
"gosh, i missed you so much, you idiot." he knows you could have easily lost feelings for him when you were away.
"wha--"
"i've suffered so much because of your stupid, dumb ass." he doesn't care.
"wait--"
"i like you, so go out with me before you have to head back to kyoto." you're back, and he's scared to lose you again. every second you stay quiet, the louder his heart beats in his ears.
"really?" you finally say, your voice barely over a whisper.
"yea." another pause.
"guess i'm yours then, beanpole."
bonus:
"you know, i knew about your crush back in high school."
"what the heck?"
"you didn't necessarily hide it well."
"then i'll have you know that yamaguchi told me everything that had happened when i've been gone."
"...fuck."
#i know i just posted#like yesterday#but there was this song that had me on a chokehold#i sacrificed my studying and sleeping hours for this#i don't think this is written exceptionally well#but the idea and emotion is still there#i hope#tsukishima kei x reader#haikyuu x reader#tsukishima x reader#haikyuu tsukishima#tsukishima kei#tsukishima kei fluff#karasuno x reader
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