#i hate myself and my only saving grace is my fucking ego but I know that that ego isn’t even warranted and it only is cuz I’m fucked up and-

[pissfizz]

Narcissism is my greatest gift and my greatest downfall

[madoheart]

I wanna try and make a sweetheart angst fic,, i need suggestions

I may never post it thoug

me myself personally I'm not too knowledgeable on fanfic stuffs, I've read like 1 or 2 in my time on the internet, but if you want any problems that Sweetheart may have I can most likely provide

To clear things up that WOULDN'T be a problem, I'd say body positivity. Sweetheart is 100% in love with her looks I'd say that's painfully obvious from her merch alone.

Mentally though she's absolutely fucked, Considering that the only parental figures she has is her Donut grandma, and even then her grandma comments about how she doesn't visit much, Sweetheart probably has a very loose connection with her. Her castle and shows and everything she does to garner attention to herself I think is a result of her suffering from neglect as a kid so she's trying to make up for that. It'd also make sense with her lack of social skills and 0 actual friends as well as the fact that she holes herself up in her castle, literally NO ONE taught her how to interact with people and how to live in the real world. I don't think she's entirely oblivious to these problems, just shutting them out with her golden ego and blinding herself with her "perfect" life. Lot's of issues with how she refuses to see how fucked she is, but I think she still absolutely knows it. In my big fucking post about Sweetheart I brought up how I thought her battle is torment for her cuz she's slowly coming to the term with the fact that her world really isn't perfect, and I don't think it's a new feeling just one that's been amplified during her battle, she knows deep down her current situation is terrible but it's not like she can do anything about it. Accepting it will make her feel worse and it's not like she has any friends she can go to, who the fuck is she gonna get help from? a sprout mole?

Post Humphrey Sweetheart is absolutely 100% way fucking worse. Any redeeming qualities her castle had is now gone and she's at probably the worst spot she's been yet. Any denial about how terrible her life was has been thrown out because she is at the undeniably worst spot of her life. She now has to deal with the fact that she took her castle life for granted, unaware of how worse things could get, but going back to it would mean going back to the lonely fantasy she had before, so while it's a saving grace compared to her maid job it definitely won't fix her problems. To make things worse Perfectheart is also thrown into the mix. Perfectheart is quite literally a perfect Sweetheart, a mockery of Sweetheart, everything Sweetheart wants to be is right in front of her watching over as she toils away at her maid duties, stuck in the spot her selfishness and greed brought her to. I think I've brought up before what I think of Perfectheart and Sweethearts dynamic for any potential Sweetheart character arc. Perfectheart can see Sweethearts troubled, she acts as her overseer to keep her in line so she pays off her debt, but also tries to nudge Sweetheart in the right path so she doesn't stay as the lonely brat she is. I like to think Perfectheart is TRYING to be SWHs friend, doing things and giving her things to make her feel more comfortable in her current situation. And on the other end, Sweetheart absolutely HATES Perfectheart, not for anything she did, just their existence mocks her. While Perfectheart just thinks Sweetheart being so dismissive of her is because Perfectheart didn't end up as her perfect suitor, Sweetheart wants nothing to do with what is basically everything she couldn't be. I'm sure at some point they'll get along and Sweetheart will open up, but when Sweetheart DOES open up it is going to be EXTREMELY messy.

tl;dr, Pre Humphrey Sweetheart suffers from neglect and denying her imperfections. Post Humphrey Sweetheart has accepted her imperfections, hates herself more than she ever could, and the one person trying to be her friend hurts to look at.

Anyways that's all I have to say about Sweethearts problems, I hope at least some of this is good fuel for your angst

[toomanyideasandfandoms]

Honestly I'm honest to god bored rn so I'm just gonna like write random shit about genshin/hsr/zenless guys that are either self aware or not (idk I'm typing this as I go)

Fair warning some might end up as smut thoughts since I have no filter while waiting for 2.2 to come for star rail

Okay but like- Wrio is a beastman right? We're all in agreement about this aren't we? Like I know he doesn't have ears or a tail but if Lyney is blood twins with Lynette then that mean beastmen genes don't always show!! I know we classify beastmen as characters with those traits but realistically wouldn't any children with their blood be classified as that race? Since it's not a transformation thing within Hoyo then you can have the blood of one and not have the more showy traits. With these points in my I will always assume Wrio is a beastman YOU CAN'T CHANGE MY MIND I REFUSE TO DEBATE ON THIS

That said....does this mean Lyney has barbs-

COUGH OKAY ILL STOP MY BARBED LYNEY AGENDA LMAO

Actually speaking of cat like men, Jing Yuan really like sets me off. Idk how but I just see his face and I wanna punch it. He just very much gives me the vibes of liking tsuns and I hate that the dynamic in my head makes me go insane. LIKE THEY COULD BE THE MEANEST BITCH AND HE WOULD JUST BE HAPPILY SMILING CHEEKILY WHILE CUDDLING THEM AS THEY CHEW OUT SOMEONE. It sounds so cute.

Also like Ratio very much fascinates me, like Alhaitham. I just really wanna pick the brains of those that are super smart, probably cause it could lead me to somehow becoming more "normal" and smart dhskdhf. Though I don't with how abnormal they are, but still I would love to talk with them about how the difference in emotional and logical responses have their importance in certain situations and also how idiocy is more so curable if you can get past the human ego.

I honestly have no idea how the dynamic between me and them would be like. Alhaitham I feel like it would be a mix of how he is with Kaveh but also mixed with a dumber version of him.

Ratio....honestly I think he would just see me as an idiot and not want to be around me LMAO. Like I can be smart...in certain topics dhskdj. But that's mainly only in art, video games, and tons of random trivia for various things. If he asked me to solve something like in math, if it's isn't a simple equation (like middle school x=y bullshit easy) I got no fucking clue. I can do simple math fast (Fast Math my saving grace, where are my fellow Fast Math champions!), not human calculator fast but fast enough to be the first one to answer most of the time.

Though maybe talking about art could be my slight savior? Since while I don't know specifically physical art techniques (besides for maybe watercolor, but it's been years since I transitioned to digital), I do love the process of art very much. Not so much art history but more so just the passion into it it takes (it's why ai art pisses me off but I'd rather not get into that). Like the meaning or reason as to why someone created something. Why would someone create an image in one way? To experiment? Because why not?

I'm not smart enough to really get philosophical or anything, but I do enjoy talking about such things with others. Though even I need to get over my ego since sometimes I know I'll shut down conversations if I realize I'm sounding like an ignorant idiot (a real big problem I have. I just hate feeling like one so much because then I have a harder time expressing myself or I think the person looks down on me somehow).

Oh god I rambled a lot about these two and myself dhskfjfk. Either way, I think I could at least be able to converse with them. But who knows if they would have positive feelings with me.

Moving topics LYCAON BEING FERAL- cough. Okay but come on!!! Like even his introduction gave hints of him being less refined as he shows himself. I WANNA SEE IT. While I love characters that are like this I just also want to know what makes them tick I WANNA BE THE ONE TO FIND AND PUSH THOSE BUTTONS. Like I don't want them to hate me oh no, but I just wanna see them snarl and rage in combat. WHAT REALLY MAKES ME CRAZY IS WHEN THEY DO GO BATSHIT ITS TO PROTECT THEIR LOVED ONES GOD AAAA

Ahem, anyway-

Honestly if in a self aware au I wonder how Lyney and Arlecchino would feel about the player simping over them both. Like how awkward would that be???? Idk if I could face them if I was isekaied into genshin because of this.

Actually I wouldn't be able to face anyone in genshin or Star Rail cause I've said SO MUCH DIRT ABOUT MYSELF AS I PLAYED, EVERYONE WOULD JUST KNOW ABOUT WHO ID WANT TO FUCK AND WHAT MY HC OF THEM WERE GOD. I would permanently live in the isolation just so I could avoid any possible looks of disgust or curiosity because I REFUSE TO TALK ABOUT IT.

It would really be hard with the characters I like because I'm already running away from them on sight, I don't need that to make me even more embarrassed.

Actually now thinking about it....I wanna know how certain characters would react if someone was running away from them on sight because they're too scared to interact because of their crush on the characters. That sounded really weird but hopefully someone gets what I mean. Cause this is me with like....almost all the guy characters in both games lmao. And some girl characters too.

I just have this thought process of like "Oh there's no way someone likes me like that, I'm too weird and loud for most." Which causes me to avoid them because if I have a crush then that means it's gonna be obvious and everyone will know, so I have to prevent that by not being around them at all!

This is mainly for fictional characters and scenarios btw, not real life. In real life I still think this way but I don't avoid people, that's rude.

I've actually had this scenario talk with my friend and it's really funny just how much I would think about avoiding the characters I love.

Like going around the chasm just to avoid having to go to Gandharva Ville to avoid Tighnari LOL. Even thought of a plan of, since that first plan of avoiding the place would fail after testing, us going there at night hoping he's not on night watch and getting a night watch ranger to escort us to the main city.

Or that fact that I would sit at the very back of the theater just so Lyney wouldn't see me in the crowd (would most likely fail) and also happily knowing I got no shot going on stage since it's a 1/168 chance (yes I counted the seats, this excludes the balcony section).

I could probably write a whole self indulgent series of how the reader would avoid certain characters and most likely fail at it. I would want to make it romantic since while I think realistically I don't think the characters would like me back, I am unfortunately a simp so I have this pesky hope of maybe.

Anyway there's your idea dump

[light-yaers]

No Saints: Chapter Six

This content is explicit and is 18+

Warnings: Graphic sexual content, violence, implied effects of PTSD, death and explicit language.

Read on Ao3 here | Fic Masterpost

Word Count - 6.1k

Chapter Six

It was approaching a week later, when someone unexpected entered the shop. You stopped polishing a blaster, looking up at him and trying to keep your cool.

“Karga,” You said plainly. You forced on a small smile. “What brings you here?”

Karga strode around your shop curiously, taking in the décor, the storage boxes, and you. He still made your skin crawl whenever you thought back to saving Mando’s skin. Stars, it meant he thought of you in that way—vulnerable, tearful, a pitiful little girl, cowering in fear next to the Mandalorian.

“Miss, good day to you,” He said in greeting. “I... bring conversation,”

Conversation. That was just another way of saying he was about to threaten you.

But about what? You didn’t know.

“Now, I’m sure you know that Nevarro is small. Operations here are left to a select few, and members of the Guild are trusted,”

“Of course. The Guild code remains law,” You agreed, unsure of where he was going with this. You tried to stand your ground, while also adopting that same character you’d played in the bar. You couldn’t immediately change your personality; it would simply hint at how it had been a plan.

“Yes, indeed,” He approached your work desk, raising his hands to his hips. “Which is why, I make it my job to make sure no one steps out of line,”

Out of line... what did he know?

“A noble position, Karga,” You said, rising yourself up to meet him face to face, as much as it made you nauseous.

“And one I take seriously,” He sent you a knowing look. You kept your stare as plain as possible, trying to convey that you had done nothing wrong, nothing to betray him or the Guild. You weren’t even a Guild member, but respecting their rules is what kept you safe on this planet; it was suicide to go against the hunters here.

Karga moved his hand to his blaster slowly. You could see it in your peripheral, sensing a rising anxiety and adrenaline coursing through your gut. If he wanted a fight, you’d win. But if you won?

You’d have to leave. You’d be a wanted woman, once again.

“There’s been word that the Mandalorian comes in here often,” Oh, stars. You stopped yourself from swallowing down your nerves, dropping your face into something resembling fear as quick as you could.

“Yes, he does,” You said honestly. There was no use in lying if he’d got a tip. “That man—so many damaged weapons, all covered in blood and dirt,” You looked at your hands, as if in thought of how disgusting it was. “I’m thankful for his business in these trying times, but stars, he scares me half to death,”

If Mando were here, he would have scoffed. What a blatant lie, from a woman who had kissed his lips five days prior. His actual lips.

“It’s taken the Guild time to trust in him again,” Karga replied, taking his hand away from his blaster. It worked—stars, it fucking worked. He believed every word your lying mouth said. “He had a lapse of judgement a while back, but without him, quarries simply wouldn’t get collected as quickly or efficiently,”

You nodded severely, coating your gaze with a subtle sadness and trying desperately not to break. You hated acting like this—weak, spineless, like you didn’t know the ways of the Guild or hunters or killers, but sometimes it was the only thing that kept you safe.

“So, I was wondering, since times are tough,” Karga continued, moving his hand to his pocket slyly. “If you and I could strike a deal?”

He laid out five hundred credits on the work desk, letting you look at them, before looking back up to him. Fuck. Not another deal.

“Information on the Mandalorian, in exchange for Guild gratitude, and some credits to make these times easier to manage,” This was a fucking sham. You knew Guild contacts weren’t allowed to keep tabs on their members like this; it was heavily frowned upon and betrayed the initial trust.

But Karga had always been a snake. He was worse than the hunters, in some aspect. He expected honesty, respect, decorum; yet he often didn’t return the favour. He’d underpay his hunters, shoot them on site for being late without hearing their story, and evidently, spy on them behind their backs.

Oh, you would certainly be telling Mando about this.

“Karga, that’s so kind of you,” You began, shooting him a graceful smile and trying not to imagine what your fist round his jaw would look like. “But I’m afraid I have nothing to give. The Mandalorian doesn’t say two words to me when he comes in. He hands me a weapon, pays me, and waits in silence while I repair it,” Lies. All lies. He did more than sit there, and he certainly didn’t stay silent.

Stars, not now.

“Well—why don’t you try—,”

“Talking to him?” You interrupted. “Tried it, he never replies. It’s like I’m just talking to myself, most of the time. Stars, he’s a scary man,”

Karga’s face dropped into a frown.

“I’m grateful for the proposition, Karga,” You said, before silently pushing his credits back towards him on the desk. “But I think it would simply be a waste of your credits,”

Karga regraded you slyly, squinting slightly at the innocent expression you were plastering all over your face. “Well,” He sighed, taking back his credits. “That you for the honesty, Miss,” He nodded at you and you nodded back. “Good day to you,”

You held your breath as he walked out of the shop, not moving until you were sure he was around the corner of the street outside. And then you exhaled heavily, clutching your heart as the waves of anxiety and adrenaline finally caused you grief. That snake; that fucking snake.

You had no way of contacting Mando before he arrived back, so you’d simply have to hope that your lies would hold up during his next visit. If Karga was wary about this enough to ask you to strike a deal with him, then this wouldn’t go away quickly—

He was after something; something to incriminate Mando in the Guild.

You kept your communicator charged and strapped to your wrist at all times, just waiting for his modulated drawl to come through over the next few days. The man was on your mind at all times; while you worked, when you ate, shot, showered and before you went to sleep. His kiss had seeped into your very being, often reappearing in your mind randomly and making you jump. Your fingers brushed your lips whenever you thought of him. Soft, prickling pecks littered your entire body in anticipation of when he’d kiss you all over—

Your skin, your chest, your collarbones and between your thighs. Stars, you’d give up every part of yourself for him—not that you’d ever admit that to the bastard; it would only serve to fuel his ego and his over-the-top confidence when he finally broke you down, made you blush, made you whimper.

A week after waking in his ship, you turned your light out and crawled into bed. He was due back tomorrow and as much as you craved his touch and his voice, you were afraid of what Karga was plotting. You’d have to tell him immediately, to at least try and halt something from happening to him without his prior knowledge.

Eventually, you fell into a deep sleep, dreaming of sweet things. Blurs of greys and browns met you behind your eyelids, mimicking the subtle reflections of the moonlight off of Mando’s Beskar helmet. In your dream, he stood over you in your room, visor peering down at your sleeping body as he quietly began taking off portions of his armour and laying them on the floor in a neat pile.

He started with his shoulder pads, moving to his chest plate and pulling it from his front and back. His leg plates came off the easiest, with subtle tugs one by one until he wore only his under clothes and helmet. It was dark, but you smiled up at where you sensed his body to be, mumbling greetings at him before he moved round to other side of the bed.

Only when he slipped off his shoes and lifted the covers, did you realise you weren’t fucking dreaming—

Stars, you were awake, barely, and Mando was slipping into bed next to you. He’d picked the lock on the door, slotted off his Beskar and crawled in right next to you, all under the cover of Nevarro darkness and with no hesitation at all.

He rested his head on the pillow next to your own, softly wrapping his arms around you as you fought against the deep sleep weighing you down. You were incoherent, utterly confused but also blisteringly hot at what was going on. Inside, a voice screamed at you to wake up, to focus on what was happening, to tell him about Karga; but the other was simply letting out pleased moans and mumbles, hooking yourself into his embrace and feeling the immediate comfort of his warm body next to yours.

You would kick yourself for this in the morning, but as you fell asleep in each other’s arms, you almost didn’t care.

Almost.

Mando stirred awake first, but he didn’t move from your side. You felt his movements as he stretched his muscles and his joints under the duvet next to you, only to shove himself back into your embrace while he moaned sleepily. You fluttered your eyes open, feeling his beating heart on your back as he hugged you from behind.

“You picked my lock again,” You croaked out, sleep still present within your voice.

A small, modulated chuckle trickled over you. “Didn’t want to wake you,” He spoke, his voice just as raw and utterly delicious as it had been waking up to him last week.

You fluttered your fingers over his own, wrapped around your torso and dangling comfortably in front of your face. His hands twitched when you first touched them, but as he got used to the sensation, he squeezed your fingers back, swiping his thumb over your knuckles rhythmically.

“I have some news,” You let out gravely, swallowing down a sudden bout of nerves. Karga—you had to tell him about Karga. You shuffled in bed, rolling over to face him head on. That didn’t stop him from repositioning himself, allowing you to lay upon his forearm. “Karga came in here two days ago, asking about you,”

You half expected Mando to tense, to sit up immediately, to go straight into hunter mode, but he didn’t. He stayed put, almost mesmerised by your face looking directly at his own. Slowly, gently, he raised a hand to your cheek, rubbing his thumb over the morning blush that they possessed. He swiped his fingers over your jaw, slotting some stray hairs behind your ear and utterly ignoring the fact that you definitely had bed hair.

Exhaling, you closed your eyes. His fingers never lost their touch, never lost their softness. You happily melted whenever he touched you, igniting your senses while simultaneously making you feel as safe as he possibly could. You wondered if your touches, your stares, your movements, made him feel the same way?

You swallowed, forcing yourself to drift back to reality, opening up your eyes. “This is serious, Mando,” You persisted. “He offered me a deal. I had to make up an excuse to deny him. Someone’s spotted you coming here and they’re suspicious,” Mando continued traversing his fingers over your face.

“Did they see you leaving the Razor Crest?” He asked gently.

“If they did, Karga didn’t mention it,”

Mando was silent for a beat, indulging in you. Then he nodded once, sternly, seeming content with that answer.

“Good. Karga believed you?”

“He took back his credits and walked out. There were no threats, so that’s a win in my book,”

“Good,”

Good. You ignored the way your heart swelled at his words. He was worried about you in this situation, not about himself. You expected Mando had been through his fair share of hiccups with the Guild, especially after he told you about the shit with the kid. His ability to brush these things off frustrated you though; maybe he was careless, or maybe he was just used to it. Either way, you still had anxiety in your gut about the encounter.

“Do you want some caf?” You asked in a whisper, still relishing in the way his fingers were floating over your skin.

“Wait,” He said in reply, which prompted you to go completely still. His fingers wound up your forehead, touching you so lightly that you could barely feel them skimming your skin. You let out a pent-up breath, relaxing ever so slightly into his grasp and sinking further into his arm. You closed your eyes once more, trying to expel the stress you felt about Karga, the constant fears of messing up these meetings with Mando, and the incessant urge to kiss every portion of his bare skin until he whimpered.

This intimacy; you craved it. Him; you missed him.

As much as it pained you, you couldn’t stop the internal clock within you from counting down every second you were with him, knowing that eventually it would run out and he’d have to leave again. With every week that passed, you missed him more, and with every time he arrived at your doorstep, you wanted him to stay for longer and longer each time.

Stars. You’d become a wetwipe over a man whose face you’d never seen.

“You made yourself very comfortable here last night,” You said, keeping your eyes closed but shooting him an amused smile. You loved that he felt at home here, loved that after so many months he finally felt open to be this soft, this gentle. There was always another side to people, and with Mando it was something you’d never expected—

He was a hunter, a killer, so ingrained in his work that it was all he did between these brief visits of comfort and affection. Maybe you were helping; helping him to return to himself after tracking and capturing quarries. It made you feel worth something, for once in your life, without that worth being down to the amount of blood you spilled in your prior life.

“It’s easy to, when you fit perfectly in my grasp,” He uttered coarsely. You perked an eyebrow at him, which he tentatively fluttered his fingers over.

“Are you saying I’m small?” You joked.

“I’m saying, you’re more cooperative when you’re half asleep,” He joked back, letting out a breathy chuckle. Stars, what you’d do to feel his breath when he did that. The subtlety of his breath hitting your skin was another craving that you’d never known you’d wanted, until the prospect of falling for a man in a helmet arose.

You shot your eyes open, slowly bringing a hand up to his neck. You wrapped your fingers around his throat gently, slowly, relishing in the touch of his warm skin. His neck was something you’d agonised over. It was so long, so tempting to bite into that you’d had to stop yourself from doing so, when you’d plastered kisses all over his chest before. His Adam’s apple protruded attractively, bobbing up and down when he spoke to you ruggedly.

You applied a slight pressure against this blood vessels, avoiding pressing into his throat.

“Are you saying I’m uncooperative?” You spoke sensually, allowing your words to trickle all over him, until you’d got what you’d wanted; the feeling of his Adam’s apple bobbing beneath your hand—as he gulped.

Bingo.

At light speed, Mando grabbed your wrist, moving his body in the same motion to peer over you. He straddled you elegantly, pushing your wrist down into the pillow above your head. Stars, he looked good like this, and the feeling was even better. A warmth spiralled from your gut, spreading through your body as arousal began to take over all of your senses.

You squirmed slightly, prompting Mando to grab your other wrist and place it up top with your other hand, using only one of his to hold you in place. His hands were huge compared to yours, yet he was so skilful with the way he moved them. They weren’t clunky; they were stealthy, they were soft, but you also didn’t doubt his ability to snap you in two at any given moment, if he wanted to.

“Smart mouth, when will you learn to keep it shut?” He growled slowly, using his knees to pry open your legs, while he dug his free hand into your upper thigh. You obeyed, wrapping your legs around his hips and trying not to completely unfold at the feeling of your bare legs upon his clothes. Night clothes weren’t the sexist of attire to wear in a situation like this, but Mando didn’t fucking care—he had you right where he wanted you.

“I was raised never to be belittled by a man,” You replied, beginning to fight back against his grasp on your hands. Mando grunted, pressing on your wrists with increased ferocity.

“I was raised never to break a promise,” Mando let out, coming in closer, closer, closer, until his hips were pressed agonisingly between your legs. It was different this time, without the confines of cargo trousers keeping him separate from you, only a pair of thin shorts lay between you and his blissfully throbbing crotch. “The wound is healed,”

Oh, fuck. Stars, he—he didn’t mean—

Before you could widen your eyes, he was already jumping off the bed. You scrambled up to sitting, watching the intense way he strode to the blinds on your window and blacked them out completely. He scanned your floor quickly, bending down and picking up the closest item of clothing he could find, before standing over you, coiling the fabric in his hands anxiously.

You knew what he wanted; he wanted assurance that you wouldn’t see his face, not while his helmet was off and on your floor. Stars, off and on your floor. Your expression softened as you shuffled towards him, draping your legs off the bed and leaning back to look up at him.

Mando wasted no time tying the shirt over your eyes. He was gentle when he tightened it, making sure not to make it uncomfortable for you. He was sweet like that, but what he did next, was the furthest thing from sweet.

Before you could react, an arm had hooked around your back, the other under your legs, as Mando all but threw you back upon the bed. Your head hit the pillow, sprawling you out in front of him while you struggled against the pitch blackness of your vision. You let out a whimper as you sensed him over you, as his hands started trailing over every part of your body; your legs, your arms, teasing his fingers up and under your night shirt and fiddling temptingly at the waistband of your shorts.

Stars, you ceased to breath.

When he stopped, it was only to take off his helmet. You heard the way it ruffled his hair beneath as he tugged it off with a grunt. That voice; you couldn’t wait to hear his voice. Without the modulator, without the immediate lowering of his tone and monotonous ways Mando spoke while he wore it.

You were practically shaking in anticipation, not being able to see where he was, or know when he’d appear between your legs. You squirmed, letting out an incredibly nervous whimper, and Mando folded—he chuckled to himself, floating his delicious voice over the room, before you felt fingers curl around your waist snuggly.

He crawled his fingers up your shirt slowly, making sure to touch as much of you as he could. Electricity wound its way up your arms, your legs, your torso, heightening your remaining senses and making everything utterly blissful—you were in heaven, stars, you knew that he was going to be good. There was no doubting it, not after the display of his skills previously.

Mando curled the fabric of your shirt up and over your tender breasts, taking his time as he slalomed his fingers between them, circling back round to skim your nipples, causing the breath to hitch in the back of your throat—

“Smart mouth,” Mando growled. His face, his bare face, was just above you, relishing in the look of you utterly helpless, melting at his touches upon new areas of your body. You bit down on your bottom lip, loving the nickname he’d adopted for you—but fuck—that’s when he let out the most painful of moans. “Fuck—,” He forced out, and in an instant, his lips were upon yours—

You wasted no time wrapping your arms around his shoulders, overwhelmed by the pure feeling of him being this close once more. You could barely talk after he’d kissed you last, and you didn’t doubt the same thing would fucking happen this time, but stars, you didn’t care. If it gave Mando the confidence to go further, to touch you all over, to know that he made you weak, then that’s all you cared about.

Fuck your dignity. Fuck your blush. If Mando wanted it, you’d just about give him anything.

His tongue fell into your mouth, deliciously inhaling you and enjoying every second of being this close. He nipped at your lower lip, groaning into your mouth with strained pleasure, while his hands slowly—delicately, agonisingly—made their way further and further down your body, finding your waistband once more.

Without warning, Mando separated from you, breathing out heavily as you still felt him upon your lips—but his breath, you felt it. You felt him breathing, felt his puffs of air as he tried desperately to quench his thirst for you. Stars—it was fucking hot. You squirmed in pleasure as Mando’s hand trickled beneath your waistband, skimming the skin just before your warmth and making you blush brighter than ever before.

“You want me to stop?” He growled. He was hungry. And you’d be lying if you didn’t love it when he spoke to you like this. You shook your head feverishly, as Mando slowly began to pull down your shorts.

He started slow, making you whimper as the anticipation became too much, before ripping them off of you. You raised your legs to the sky as he pulled the fabric from each foot and threw them behind him, the same way he’d done with those tight trousers. You gasped when he stopped momentarily though, as his fingers brushed over the scarred skin on your right ankle—

You began to get up, to reach out and find his hand to stop him from looking at the mark, but all you got in return was Mando spreading your legs as wide as they could go. You collapsed back onto the bed, trying to stop your upper thighs from trembling, but it was far too late.

“You’re already drenched,” Mando breathed out, looking at your pussy head on; relishing in the way it glistened just for him. You whimpered, feeling the vulnerabilities of him staring at your slit and trying to close your legs as a reflex, but stars—Mando didn’t like that.

He didn’t like that one bit.

His fingers dug into your thighs as he opened your legs sternly, grunting in effort at the small fight you were putting up. “Don’t you dare,” He growled sternly, and stars, you all but froze in place. “Don’t hide,” He continued, softening his voice slightly as you continued to fucking die as the mere image of him descending upon your aching pussy. “Not from me, ever,”

Ever—when he said it, you flinched all over. Because you could feel his breath; you could feel it on your pussy. Right over your throbbing clit, right over your blistering warmth. Mando was biding his time, making you cry, making you whimper and whine, and he was loving it. The bastard, the fucking bastard.

“Mando—,” You stuttered out, but all too soon his mouth latched onto your pussy. You let out the longest groan you’d ever released as all of your muscles tensed at once. Your entire body was on fire, lit up from the subtle movements of Mando’s tongue slowly licking up and down over your sensitive slit.

His hands gripped your thighs hungrily, pulling you closer to his mouth with every breath and shudder that ran through your body. “Fuck—fuck—,” Was the only thing you could actually manage to get out, as his tongue began drawing circles around your clit, missing it intentionally as he riled you up intensely first.

There it was, that warmth—the warmth that signified the fucking want to burst was rising up faster than ever before while Mando ate you out sublimely, mixing up his movements to be both soft and incredibly fast. His tongue was perfection, his mouth was parted just for you, as his stubble caught on your lips and added to the pleasure tenfold.

You let out a moan when he came up for air, breathing shallowly while his hands settled upon your belly, pulling you closer than ever before. “You tell me when you’re close, and I won’t ever stop,” His voice was deep, slick, his lips covered in you and only you.

Before you could reply, he buried his face between your thighs. You fucking yelled, grabbing onto the closest thing you could for stability, which happened to be his hair. His hair, it was soft, matted, but just long enough for you to pull between your flinching fingers. Mando’s ferocity only increased as you scratched your nails over his scalp, making him moan into your opening and hazard a small nip upon your clit between his teeth—

You yelped, jumping up involuntarily at his reply to your hand placement. Mando pushed you back down by your belly, diving deep between your slit to continue those agonising circles, lapping up every last drop of you that he could. His speed was increasing slowly, agonisingly, as your gut continued to coil at the feel of his mouth upon your most sensitive area—an area that you’d dreamed he’d one day explore. Stars, he was fucking relentless, showing no mercy while you were on the brink of tears.

Oh, stars—you were going to cum.

You shuddered, going utterly silent while Mando continued lapping you up. You moved your hands to his face, placing them on either side of his cheeks and digging your fingers into his neck slightly. “M-Mando—,” You stuttered out, feeling the way your gut was contracting and knowing that it wouldn’t be long.

“Cum,” Was all he said in reply. “I can feel you. Let go,” He spoke into your slit, not removing himself from your pussy while you whimpered in pleasure, heartrate accelerating, breath hitching in the back of your throat constantly.

Stars, it was going to happen, you were so close—but that’s when Mando removed himself from your clit, pushing himself up quickly until you knew he was peering down at you, face to face. He got in close to your face, bringing a hand to gently curl around your neck. You whined intensely, smacking your hands on his chest in protest.

“Please—why the fuck did you—,” Mando cut you off by pressing his blistering lips against your own. That shut you up perfectly, as you tasted yourself upon his soft lips.

“Always so rude,” He moaned into your mouth. You bit his bottom lip suddenly, making him jump away from your face.

“Says the man who just edged me to oblivion,” You growled at him, letting out a snarl as you squirmed beneath him. Mando only chuckled, and stars, it just fucking turned on you more. You were still riding the coattails of almost coming into his mouth, but you had no idea what he was playing at by leaving your aching pussy to get lonely.

“I’m not finished yet,” He said slowly, gritting his teeth in pain. “So impatient—,” He stopped talking when you grabbed him by the neck and shoved his mouth onto your own once more. He pulled back after kissing you feverishly, tightening his grip on your neck slightly as you moaned in a new type of pleasure. “I wanted to see that blush, so I can notice the difference after you cum in my mouth,”

As fast as he’d stopped, Mando shoved his face into your slit once more, and stars—you had to stop yourself from screaming. His hand stayed plastered around your throat, relishing in the way he could feel every time the breath caught in the back of your throat at his movements. If he’d been somewhat gentle before, he’d now thrown all of that out of the fucking window, adopting a delicious, up-pace rhythm as you squirmed beneath him.

The feeling in your gut came back tenfold as you fought against the rising yells in your throat. Your entire body was buzzing with pleasure, as the tension in your muscles were begging for relief, for release, for Mando to tip you over the edge.

You fumbled as you wrapped your fingers around his arm, still holding your neck firmly and pressing down heavenly upon your blood vessels. With every subtle press, your eyes rolled to the back of your head, causing a new sensation to rise within you and only increase your overall pleasure. Stars, you knew he was going to be good—

But this good? This man must have learned this from somewhere, and stars, you wanted to fucking know what else he could do; how else he could make you unwind effortlessly.

You swallowed painfully, feeling a clear acceleration beneath your chest. You felt your hairs stand on end, as sweat started to pool on your chest and other parts of your bare skin. “I’m—,” You began, but had to stop and let out a back-arching moan, as Mando only sped up the motions of his tongue upon your quivering clit. “Gonna— cum,�� You forced out sternly.

Mando kept to his promise—when you said the word, he didn’t fucking stop. He only kept going, increasing his speed, tightening his grip on your belly and your neck and making you see stars behind your eyelids. You squirmed, breathing shallowly, as if in panic, when in reality you were fucking seconds away from coming into the Mandalorian’s open mouth.

You let out a few static fucks, arching your back further and further, while Mando stayed latched onto you like a fucking leech, sucking you dry, making you moan and groan and sweat and ache, and then—in a wave of pleasure, you came.

You came hard, releasing a screaming groan hybrid and collapsing your legs to fall on Mando’s head. He didn’t mind though; he kept his lips glued to your pussy, occasionally licking along your slit to lap everything up neatly. He missed your clit though, not wanting you to feel overstimulated after orgasming the hardest you ever had in your life.

You tensed every few seconds, feeling the aftershocks of your orgasm while Mando slowly, delicately, unlatched himself from you. He let out a small chuckle in approval, no doubt admiring his work, before he crawled back up to your face. He placed pecks on your neon red cheeks, bringing his mouth down to press upon your own softly, gently, directly juxtaposing to the way he’d eaten you out just moments before.

Mando was many things; terrifying, mysterious, silent. But he also had a different side; funny, soft, warming and incredibly gentle. Whichever side you got, you always felt blessed. Especially here, t-shirt tied around your eyes to stop you from seeing his face, naked from your breasts down and limbs utterly exhausted and unable to move—

You were in bliss.

Because he was next to you.

And because he’d just made you cum really fucking hard.

“Look at this,” He whispered, placing another peck upon your exhausted lips. “She’s finally lost for words,”

Stars, you would have punched him in the gut if you had the strength, but all of it was being sucked up from the colossal release you were still feeling. You simply kept silent, eyes closed behind the makeshift blindfold, relishing this feeling. Mando reached down to grab his helmet, and all too soon it was slotted back over his head. You frowned when he gently took your mask off, revealing his chrome visor that you knew so well.

You smiled at him smally as he straddled your waist softly, reaching up to place a hand against the cold Beskar of his helmet. There was something about looking at him when you did this, which of course you couldn’t do when he had his mask off. As much as you loved feeling the lines of his face, his facial hair, his lips—you loved looking at him like this.

Exposed, vulnerable, trying to show him everything that you wanted to scream at his face, but couldn’t because of the way you were inherently afraid of weakness. Was liking someone a weakness? Was wanting to be around them, make them feel good, miss them when they were gone, weak?

Or was it a strength?

Mando curled his fingers around your wrist gently, just holding them there while you kept an unwavering stare on his visor. “I can make some caf,” He said quietly, his voice utterly different to the way he’d spoken when he was face deep in your cunt.

You couldn’t help it—you let out a scoff, draping an arm over your blushing face to cover yourself up from even more humiliation. “You just ate my pussy, made me cum, and now you’re going to make me caf?” You let out, stuttering out some involuntary chuckles after speaking.

Stars, you knew he was grinning beneath that fucking helmet, just from the way he was silently looking at you. “Yeah,” He replied simply, before getting up and heading to the small kitchenette of the shop.

Mando stayed for coffee, though he didn’t have any, obviously. He did lie next to you as you drank your own, watching the way you went over your schedule and agenda for the working day, noting things down with a tiny, over-sharpened pencil in a notepad and sipping at your caf throughout.

He didn’t say much, just light conversation about the kid, about his upcoming meeting with Karga later that morning, about the way you needed to brush your hair, before he was combing his fingers through your scalp without being asked to. Mando, you realised, had a love language; something to show his affection, his desires, to show his care. It wasn’t speaking, he was a man of little to no words. It was touching—

However small. A hand on your back, fingers combing through your hair, thumb swiping over your lips. That was him saying “I’m here. I’m here right now, with you.”

When it was time for him to leave, you tried not to pout. He slotted his Beskar back on, mumbling to himself about checking on the kid before heading to the bar, and then he was slinging his satchel over his shoulder and following you to the door. You hugged your arms coldly, patting bare feet upon the shop floor before you unlocked the front door and creaked it open.

Mando lingered in the doorway. “Meet me at the Razor Crest tonight,” He stated. You widened your eyes in surprise.

“Why?” You questioned. His visor didn’t meet your eyes.

“I need to ask you something,” He said finally. You nodded slowly, despite him not looking towards you. That’s when he left. No “See you next week”, no flirtatious banter that both of you had become accustomed to over the past few months. No nothing.

You felt slightly anxious when you shut the door, trying not to overthink his incredibly blunt nature, after such a comfortable night and intense morning together. Mando was many things; a hunter, a killer, and you knew he was dangerous. But that didn’t stop you from feeling these things. It didn’t stop you from second guessing every silent stare, every absent touch, every blunt reply.

Stars—men.

Nevertheless, you had work to do. You readied yourself for the day, all too aware of the ticking clock, counting down to when you’d next see your Mandalorian—

To when you’d get to kiss those lips once more.

[thedevilsmemes]

      PINTEREST QUOTES I USE IN MY MUSINGS BOARDS                         ~ A SENTENCE MEME - PART 2

                         Change pronouns as / when needed to preferred pronoun.

“I do not do justice, I do damage. I do not do empathy, I do damage. I do not do forgiveness, I do damage. I do not do mercy, I do damage.”

“Like, you can boss me around in sexual situations but you better not try to tell me what to do in regular life.”

“I’m fine, I’ve had worse.”

“I’m meaner than my demons.”

“If I cannot bend Heaven, I will raise Hell.”

“Well, aren’t you a little ray of pitch black?”

“He was like a storm.”

“You want to play dirty? Fine, let’s play dirty!”

{ feels an emotion. } “Who the fuck authorised this?!”

“What the fuck? What the fuck is this? What the fuck?”

“Judge if you want. We are all going to die. I intend to deserve it.”

“Goddamn right you should be scared of me.”

“They wanted a monster; I decided to give them one.”

“Seduce and destroy.”

“What the fuck is intimacy? How does that work? Letting… people be close to you? What the fuck?”

“You couldn’t kill me if you tried for one hundred years.”

“I’ll do this my way.”

“I am severely emotionally unstable.”

“What, from the bottom of the heart, the fuck?”

“I’m sorry, I don’t take any orders. I barely take suggestions.”

“I send my best regards from Hell.”

“I like my coffee how I like myself: Dark, bitter and too hot for you.”

“Me and God, we don’t get along.”

“Be brave, Angel.”

“Self care is drinking three pots of coffee and getting into a knife fight with God.”

{ takes gulp of vodka straight from the bottle } “My day was fine.”

“Have I stabbed you? No. Then I am being nice.”

“Holy Shit! I’M the demon living in my house.”

“Sir, that’s my emotional support knife collection.”

“I want an ancient elaborate dagger with my name engraved into the blade as a gift. The only romantic gesture.”

“ ‘Are you a top or a bottom?’ I'm a threat!”

“Stop being so defensive! I’m just trying to hit you with weapons.”

“The more knives you have the more valid you are.”

“She’s strong but she’s exhausted.”

“She loves moonlight and rainstorms and so many other things that have soul.”

“My darling, you can’t see it can you? How like the moon you are. Both of you so timid in yourselves; hiding pieces from the world. Then, there are those rare moments when you are both full, and it becomes hard to look away. You are beautiful.”

“Calm her chaos but never silence her storm.”

“She wears strength and darkness equally well. That girl has always been half Goddess, half Hell.”

“She has been through Hell, so believe me when I say, fear her when she looks into the fire and smiles.”

“She’s proof that you can walk through Hell and still be an angel.”

“She is both hellfire and holy water. And the flavour you taste depends on how you treat her.”

“Even the mountains can not hold all you have been carrying.”

“Storm with skin.”

“She’s thunderstorms”

“Kindness is a language that the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”

“Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life.”

“You have a heart of gold.”

“Butterflies are the Heaven-sent kisses of an angel.”

“She who is brave is free.”

“Clever as the Devil and twice as pretty.”

“Shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick.”

“Girls who run in heels should be feared.”

“Family is everything to me.”

“She’s an old soul that believes in chivalry, romance, and love.”

“I hate getting flashbacks from things I don’t want to remember.”

“I run on coffee and grace.”

“I’m glad I’ve got boobs… the last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.”

“Tell me to put on my big girl panties one more time… and I’ll take off my thong and strangle you with it!”

“Please read all my posts in a sarcastic tone. You know, for full effect.”

“I have one nerve left and you’re dry-humping it, go away.”

“If I offend you, cry me a river. I’ll bring snacks and a raft. I will literally float down your tears, eating chips and working on my tan.”

“When she is happy, she can’t stop talking. When she is sad, she doesn’t say a word.”

“Music becomes my best friend when nobody else understands me.”

“Act like a lady, think like a boss.”

“I know I have friends but I feel I have no one to talk to about the shit that goes on in my head.”

“She was special. She combined a mean angel and a kind devil.”

“So much pain for someone so young.”

“She’s one of a kind.”

“Red lips and wine sips.”

“Brave girl, it’s time to love again.”

“She is intelligent.”

“Sometimes, when I say ‘I’m okay.’ I want someone to look me in the eyes, hug me tight, and say, ‘I know you’re not.’ ”

“Because I’m not the kind of girl guys fall in love with.”

“I fear I will spend my life, waiting for a love story that doesn’t exist.”

“You’re a woman, use it; bring every man you meet to his motherfucking knees.”

“She denies it but, the truth is, she’s falling in love with him.”

“Hearing your heels click on the floor sounds like power.”

“She loves deeply, regardless of the love she gets back in return and it’s both her biggest strength and biggest weakness…”

“Experience raised her. Hurt taught her. Neither defined her.”

“She was not fragile like a flower was, she was fragile like a bomb.”

“Life is short; make every hair flip count.”

“I’ve always been someone who looks ‘too deep’ into something or someone. That’s because I realised from a young age that there’s always more than what meets the eye.”

“If I say ‘first of all’ Run away because I have prepared research, data, charts, and will destroy you.”

“Underestimate me, that’ll be fun.”

“You think I’m sarcastic? You should hear what I don’t say!”

“She’s a combination of sensitive and savage.”

“Stay classy, sassy and a bit bad assy.”

“She’s battling things her smile will never tell you about.”

 “Ain't you ever seen a princess be a bad bitch?”

“I was told I was dangerous… I asked why? They said ‘because you don’t need anyone.’ That’s when I smiled.”

“She’s been through hell and came out an angel. You didn’t break her darling, you don’t own that kind of power.”

“Watch me. I will go to my own sun and, if I am burned by the flames, I will fly on scorched wings.”

“Her messy hair is a visible attribute to her stubborn spirit. As she shakes it free, she smiles, knowing wild is her favourite colour.”

“She’s strong. But in the back of her mind she doesn’t think that she was meant to be this strong for this long. And she wonders if there is a man out there, somewhere, who understands this.”

“She’s not for everyone and she knows it. People find her different and strange. She dances in the rain, she laughs when she cries and loves through her pain. People fear the unknown and they never knew a girl like her.”

“Don’t tell a girl with fire in her veins and hurricane bones what she should and shouldn’t do. In the blink of an eye, she will shatter that ridiculous cage you attempt to build around her beautiful bohemian spirit.”

“You provoke her until she roars and then get upset at her for becoming the monster you created.”

“Rip out his ego with your fresh nails.”

“She isn’t the sunrise; she’s the fucking sun.”

“You can’t touch a woman who can wear pain like the grandest of diamonds around her neck.”

“Watch your tongue around her. She will bear her fangs and tear you apart with all the grace of a Queen.” 

“If you won’t embrace her madness, then you’ll never taste her magic.”

“Beauty may be dangerous but intelligence is lethal.”

“She is water. Powerful enough to drown you, soft enough to cleanse you, deep enough to save you.”

“Heavy is the crown and yet she wears it as if it were a feather. There is strength in her heart, determination in her eyes and the will to survive resides within her soul.”

“I wish that I could say that I am a light that never goes out, but I flicker from time to time.”

“Spoil me with loyalty. I can finance myself.”

“Shoutout to all the people with brown hair and brown eyes! We basic as fuck but we cute!”

“I feel a nap coming on.”

“Is horny an emotion?”

“I just really like thigh-highs.”

“Even though she looks innocent, she is really a perverted demon.”

“She didn’t sob or wail. Her pain was horribly discreet but as persistent and almost as silent as bleeding from an unstitched wound.”

“I don’t rise from the ashes, I make them. I’m the whole fucking fire.”

“Beautiful but destructive.”

“I’m aiming for the ‘she’s a badass and cute as hell but I wouldn’t touch her without asking’ look.”

“Loving me must be so fucking hard and I’m so sorry.”

“Some women are lost in the fire. Some women are built from it.”

“You glow differently when you’re actually happy.”

“She’s magic, that one.”

“Kicked out of Hell.”

“Red hair: the crown you never take off.”

“You’ve got a fire inside.”

“She doesn’t need a warrior, she is one. What she needs is a devout heart, and strong arms to hold her after her battles are won.”

“You are the love that came without warning: You had my heart before I could say no.”

“You want battle? I’ll give you war.”

“True evil is, above all things, seductive.”

“The Devil’s got nothing on me, my friend.”

“Haven’t I fallen far enough?”

“I’m not like them, but I can pretend.”

“I don’t like being told what to do.”

“Now I grow wings and rage, and learn how to kill.”

“Life is tough, my darling, but so are you.”

“Though she be little, she be fierce.”

“I know what this is; It’s just myself, talking to myself, about myself.”

“You underestimate my power.”

[angelic-serenade]

Alastor + disaster cook! S/O

headcanons

✧༝┉┉┉┉┉˚*❋ ❋ ❋*˚┉┉┉┉┉༝✧

gif, original work and characters do not belong to me

you could not cook to save your life

any attempt at cooking would result in certain failure in the best case scenario and 5.4 magnitude earthquake damage in the worst

sure, you could make edible pasta and if you really put your best efforts into it, acceptable omelette too

but anything past that level of complexity was simply out of your league, a lost cause to put it mildly

don't you even think about making a cake, that shit's dangerous

as they say: as above so below

when you landed in Hell and found yourself joining the Happy Hotel soon after, you came to find out your culinary skills had not magically improved

which is quite ironic since Charlie had made you head chef of the hotel

the string of curses which had left your lips upon hearing the news had been legendary, even for Hell

you adored the demon princess with your whole heart (or whatever was left of it anyway), bUT REALLY CHARLIE? YOU DO NOT GIVE A GUN TO A CHILD AND EXPECT CASUALTIES NOT TO HAPPEN

at this point you were certain she was subconsciously auto-sabotaging

either way, you didn't have the heart to tell her no, so you decided to put your heart and soul into trying to learn how to properly cook, which didn't turn out to be the ideal choice of words since you were in Hell and your soul was probably rotten to the core

at least, nobody could say you hadn't tried your damn best

and hey! some days your cooking hadn't even been completely sickening

you decided to stick to easy, “safe” dishes though, you know, just to be sure

so pasta and eggs were definitely a thing

a constant and repetitive thing to be precise

you were trying your best, okay? nobody in your place with your limited set of skills would have taken the job, but you did and you deserved recognition for that feat alone

or a fucking donkey hat for your skyrocketing dumbness levels

things were not so bad at first

both Charlie and Vaggie were very supportive, each one of them in their own way - even though you had totally seen Charlie trying to swallow pure unadulterated fear that one time you had announced you wanted to try to cook something more elaborate

Angel Dust on the other hand... hadn't been as considerate as to lie to your face about what he thought of your cooking

"fuck me doll, this shit's disgusting"

*insert the I don't have friends they disappoint me vine here*

Vaggie had proceeded to give Angel quite the earful while Charlie tried her best to cheer you up

you went full hermit mode on them for two days after that

you were proud of yourself, handling criticism so well

anyway, the cycle kept repeating, with the only difference that most days Angel would grab something to eat outside of the hotel and join you during meals only to blankly stare at the plates and silvery

Charlie had tried to shield you from the truth, but you weren't that stupid

you respected Angel's choice, really, you did, and you had decided to be the bigger person among the two

that's why you began to put a lil bit of laxative into his portions whenever he decided to grace your efforts and actually eat your "disgusting cooking"

y’know just to spicy things up a little

at least now he had a valid reason to complain

with the whole fiasco on live TV and the sudden and suspicious appearence of the one and only Radio Demon at your doorstep, however, things started going haywire

Alastor's presence was eeirly demanding and unsettlingly charmimg at the same time

so it was only natural for you to gravitate the fuck away from him whenever you could

you always acted politely, greeting him whenever you bumped into him through the corridors of the hotel, but you only went as far as to appear courteous because you didn't want for him to go Hannibal Lecter on you. thanks, no thanks

“and what can you do my feminine fellow?”

“I can suck your dick!”

you had snorted a bit at that which immediately shifted the strawberry pimp's attention to yourself

“and what about you, pretty dame? I take it you're in charge of the kitchens around here?”

dressed in your chef attire, you were going to meekly answer him, but before you could, roaring laughter erupted in the room. it belonged to the one and only slutty spider you found oh so irritating

in the fraction of seconds, Alastor snapped his neck at an unnatural angle to stare at the spider with a strained smile on his face

needless to say, the cursed image would forever haunt your traumatized psyche

“hasn't your mother taught you it is rude to interrupt a conversation which you have no part in? that just won't do!”

static filled the air and you feared you were going to implode if the heavy pressure didn't lift off soon enough, so you decided to take action

“ugh... yes, I'm the head chef! but, well, I... could actually use some practice and proper training?”

you hated how uncertain you sounded, but Angel's comments and your own dissatisfaction with your culinary products made you quite self-conscious about your skills

“don't fret your pretty little head about it, my dear! I, for one, am a culinary connaisseur and wonderful chef, if I do say so myself. I'll be ecstatic to guide you through your training!”

how you'd be able to handle his booming voice during hours and hours of practice was your first and main concern, but you had never been one to refuse the chance to finally prove the people who had criticized you wrong *cough cough* Angel Dust

since that day, Alastor began to personally give you cooking lessons

he was exuberant and pretty sly when it came to veiled jabs about your dreadful cooking, but he really took his time to help you out

which you had been both grateful and suspicious about

“now, we can't have our future patrons starving to death, can we?”

he was strangely patient and an overall good teacher too (emphasis on overall)

he guided you step by step through each dish, simultaneously showing off his own flawless culinary skills

you hated that you daily found yourself boosting his already GIGANTIC ego, but you couldn't help it. you could only dream about reaching that level of artistry in cooking

he always came up with creative recipes to test your limits and cooked for you in order to make you more familiar with different tastes. his mother’s were your favorites, jambalaya being his one true specialty 

he had blindfolded you once and proceeded to present you with various samples of spices, oilments and all kinds of food so that you could acquaint yourself with the smells and flavors of the ingredients and figure out yourself which ones would best suit a certain dish

saying you were hesitant at first was an understatement, because you know? being completely at the mercy of a sadistic serial killer who had terrorized the seven circles of hell? not even being able to see him? not on your bucket list

he had tried to ease your nervousness with the whole “if I wanted to hurt anyone here, I would have done so already” thing, but it was getting kind of old pretty fast

“if I had been one to play with fire, I'd have joined a circus”

he found your sense of humor as endearing your sheer presence

(when he rolled up his sleeves to cook, you felt like you could catch fire any minute, you were a slut for strong skinny arms) 

yes, Alastor had always loved to show off his own impeccable skills but he unexpectedly found himself enjoying the moments spent in your company too

he relished in seeing you fail again and again, but he also admired the way you always managed to bring yourself back up to your feet each time

he had yet to fully understand if it was foolishness or stubbornness to guide your steps

either way, you turned out to be his favorite form of entertainment in the hotel!

no matter how many slights would he send your way, you'd always manage to find an appropriate remark that made his permanent smile stretch a little more in sheer amusement

“oh dear, this beef is so undercooked one could still hear the poor beast’s lament”

“the only noise I hear is the obnoxious ramblings of an arrogant boomer”

he wasn't technically a boomer but it was always so satisfying to irk him with terms he had no knowledge of

during your cooking lessons, when the only thing left to do with a dish was wait and pray for the best, you'd come to talk about everything and anything

he'd talk to you about his precious New Orleans as he remembered it and you'd fill him in on recent historical/social developments of your time

he always looked so taken when you shared with him that modern knowledge and it made you feel useful for a change

it was, dare you say it, almost adorable how he'd ask you countless questions about your home town, the catastrophes of the last century and had there been any other war since his death?

the topic switches almost made you dizzy though

once or twice, when the timing allowed, he'd even indulge in a musical show to pass time

on the days your mood soured because of a particularly complicated recipe or bad result, he'd drag you along and dance until you were so distracted by the absurdness of the circumstances that you forgot about your previous sadness

with time, his musical shows became more frequent as he realized you'd always offer him a genuine smile after his flashy performances

it was out of personal indulgence, not because he liked the way his music always seemed to cheer you up

he'd not been vocal about the way he tried to comfort you, but you were grateful nonetheless

the first time you managed to succesfully complete one of his complicated recipes, you had almost cried

“now, now deary, under my watchful eye, it was only a matter of time until you'd finally blossom into a fine cook!”

“Alastor can I... can I hug you?”

and how could he say no to such an adorable expression? he found himself stunned into silence, not being able to tell you yes either, therefore you slowly came closer as if trying not to scare a wild animal away

when Alastor passively stood before you, not moving away, you wrapped your arms around him

he really was such a dorky noodle

he didn't relax into the hug, but he kept still as you relished in the moment and let the pressure you had hoarded for months now loose

Alastor proceeded to show off your dish during dinner and even Angel Dust could do nothing but shut up and dig in

The all powerful Radio Demon was simply so proud of your progress - not that he doubted you'd prevail in the end, thanks to his expertise and guidance

from that moment onward things only got better and even if you didn't necessarily need Alastor's help anymore, neither of you ever mentioned going your separate ways

you were both secretly glad for the silent agreement

friendly banter and dad jokes were a daily occurrence and with your new-found confidence in the field, you'd always bite back showing off new delicious dishes instead than words

you still had trouble every now and then, but Alastor was always there to help you out

not that you'd ever hear the end of it if you actually asked him for help

“what was that, my darling? is the mightiest chef in Hell having trouble in Paradise?”

you had noticed however that he'd started sneaking glances your way more than usual lately and he also started following you around wherever you went in the hotel. he became your shadow both inside and outside of the kitchen

the attention soon became unnerving, even more so when you'd go in the kitchen only find a different flower on the counter each morning

you came to realize that Alastor's advances were rather old fashioned, but you would amuse the dork and yourself for a while before taking charge

gifts became an ordinary occurrence as well as praise and you preferred not to think about what praise could do to you when it came from Alastor

he enjoyed your reactions to his flattering words a little too much, he had to admit

you had had enough of his childish antics one day and you decided to finally put your plan into action

“Al, can you come here for one sec?”

he wasn't particularly fond of the nickname, but you just loved to get under his skin as much as he did when it came to you

“what can I do for you, my darling chef?”

“here, I have a gift for you”

he looked uncharacteristically unsure of what to do but slightly amused as well. in the end curiosity took the best of him and he finally decided to open the box you had handed to him rather unceremoniously

“what is this dear?”

the apron you had chosen was a perfect fit for your long boi

“read it, please”

“kiss the cook? well, if you ask me so nicely, I just might have to”

he then proceeded to peck your cheek and you swore you could have fainted right there and then by the sheer sweetness of the gesture

it hadn't exactly been what you had planned, but you weren't going to complain

your relationship was bound to be full of surprises apparently

[colorseeingchick]

Hi! May i please have a matchup from MHA? I’m a bisexual 19 year old girl. I’m 5’9, caucasian, and i have wavy long brown hair, hazel eyes, and i wear glasses. I have a thin/athletic build. I have a soft light academia kind of style, and i love wearing sweaters.

I’m INTP, and i tend to be really antisocial. My sense of humor is really sarcastic, and i like to playfully tease people. People describe me as kind of intimidating sometimes, mainly because i’m usually quiet around others. I’m also pretty stubborn. Despite this, i’m also pretty childish sometimes, but i know how to be serious too. In a relationship, i’m a bit easily jealous, but i don’t like showing it.

I’m in college and majoring in psychology. I take schoolwork pretty seriously, and i’m also learning french on the side!

My love language is words of affirmation, and i’m not a big fan of physical affection! I take things slow in a relationship.

I’m very into fitness and health, and i exercise every day (mainly strength!). Some of my other hobbies include shopping, playing video games, and baking. I’m a stress baker, sometimes i’ll get upset and the way i’ll cheer myself up is by making a batch of cookies or cupcakes :) I’m into a lot of soft things, like animal crossing, minecraft, and sanrio, but i’m also a really big fan of horror games and movies!! My favorite season is fall, and my favorite color is purple. I’m also an avid coffee drinker, but i love hot cocoa too. Thank you so much in advance :)

AHHH I KNOW WHO TO MATCH YOU WITH hear me out okay I match you with...

Shigaraki Tomura

I'm so sad I couldn't find that gif of him looking pretty with his side profile

(A side note, I’m not a manga reader~ so this is based off the anime and my understanding of Shiggy). You would be a big blessing for the League in general and Shigaraki’s saving grace. Shiggy and you would probably initially have clashing personalities, but I think after you warmed up to him, he’d find himself in loveee~

I got so carried away with this one so please do not mind me

You’d end up in the league as someone who was held captive (they were looking for a mind-based quirk and took you in). You were a psych major at your university in order to better understand your quirk, where you were successful and became well known. Shigaraki had heard of you and asked for you specifically. When he captured you, he found you to be quiet- not answering any questions. He was taken aback by the first words out your mouth being a really sarcastic comment that had Dabi chuckling. From there Shigaraki was pretty flustered (pretty girl insulting him hurts his ego) and determined you probably wouldn’t cooperate. He was shocked when you agreed to join the League. You decided to coexist with him, not really paying him much mind, just viewing him as the boss. It was only during a conversation with Toga that his perspective on you changed. “She fits in, boss! We’re glad ya brought her here.”

When he sat and thought about it, you did fit in. You were as intimidating as the rest of them, for sure. You may not have actively engaged with everyone by talking, the moments you did spend acknowledging them were nice. Shigaraki specifically remembers a time when you made some cookies and left them for the League to eat (you’d stress baked a huugeee batch), and he remembers looking around at the League- people who he knew weren’t always the softest, people who he knew had gone through a lot of shit, and he watched them… eat cookies. Quietly, contently. And he ate some, too. And he thought that it was a kindness he didn’t think he’d experienced before. He enjoyed it. He hoped right then and there that you’d bake for them again.

Whenever you did spend time actively talking to the rest of the League, you’d always make the funniest comments, and when they weren’t directed at Shigaraki, he found them hilarious. And (he’d never say it) he tolerated the teasing you did to him, because while he hated being made fun of, he loved when you talked to him (Dabi noticed his crush and instantly taunted Shigarakit- which Shigaraki didn’t tolerate loll).

Another major perk of having you be a part of the League was having access to your knowledge about health- both physical and mental. You actively tried to live a healthy lifestyle- you’d work out, eat properly, and made sure to drink lots of water. The league never really spent too much time working on their health, but watching you do so intrigued them. Toga and Twice were intrigued enough that they decided to try it out with you. I think they found self care to be quite nice! Your knowledge of psychology also helped with monitoring their mental states.

All this said, Shiggy was grateful for how you intentionally or unintentionally helped the league out, and started falling for you in the process. He didn’t think you’d ever like him, so he wasn’t planning on saying anything. But Toga and Kurogiri both forced him to (Toga knew you had developed a soft spot for their leader), and when you accepted his feelings this man felt like his life would never be the same.

As a boyfriend, Shigaraki would take the best care of you. I think he’d be 1)bragging about you constantly. To the whole league. ALL the time. “Are you two dating? I had no fucking clue,” Dabi had said once in the middle of Shiggy talking about you again. He’d also praise you to your face all the time. He talked about how smart you are, how talented you are, he’d tell you how you made the League more fun, all sorts of things. If you ever got jealous of smaller villains flirting with him, he’d (revel in it slightly cuz he thought you being jealous was really attractive, but also) assure you that he’d turn them to dust if you asked. He’d steal for you if you’d let him, but he wouldn’t object to going out and actually shopping if you preferred that.

2) He’d try to spend as much time with you as he could when he wasn’t plotting the destruction of hero society. He understood that you liked space and time to yourself, and he did a good job of respecting it. But when you wanted to, he would love to play minecraft and animal crossing with you. He stole bought a switch for you so you two could play together, even if on opposite sides of the room. He would make the League have movie nights to watch horror movies when he found out you liked them, even if it ended with him getting made fun of for being caught off guard with jumpscares.

Fights with Shigaraki weren’t common, but they were wild when they happened. Both of you had the tendency to be childish when you were upset, and both of you were stubborn. It was usually a waiting game till one of you decided they missed the other, and from there you would both talk it out. Afterall, you knew how to be serious about things when you had to, and Shigaraki wasn’t the type to let a fight get in the way of his love for you.

I think your relationship can be summarized by that one quote- “A hero would sacrifice you to save the world. But a villain would sacrifice the world for you.” Your relationship with Shigaraki was wholesome, loving, innocent, and funny all the same. You had the leader of the LOV wrapped around your finger.

~~~

I hope you enjoyed! I personally love Shigaraki a lot but I know not everyone likes villains, so I hope you didn't mind being matched up with one! if you're unhappy with it just lemme know okay

[atinybitofau]

[PART 7] S A N royal series au

RECAP: san is king of eden, you’re queen of elos under one nation along side 7 other lone kings. upon being invited to San’s kingdom, he asks for your help and you find some answers to your own questions.

• series masterlist •

⇩ PART SEVEN ⇩ , click me to read part six.

“Looking like fine wine, this afternoon, princess.” King San teases your choice of color. “I didn’t know you liked to couple match.”

You scoff your exasperation away and part your lips. “My choice of wardrobe is a mere coincidence. You flatter yourself too often.”

He licks at his lips. “On par.”

“What am I doing here, San?”

“Uh uh.” His eyebrow soars up on his forehead. “That’s King San to you. Must I remind you every time?”

Glancing at the curious eyes around you, you let image overpower and you’re forced to correct yourself. “Forgive me, your grace— King San, thou most noble, most sovereign, the mightiest monarch under the lord’s blessed eyes. I concede you’d be any more of that, oh mighty imperial prince.”

San grins at you again and it’s because of plain amusement. Where his kingdoms finest men watch you gloat for their king, he knows you’re only trying to press his buttons. Annoyed at most that he’s making you do the unspeakable.

“That’s more like it.”

You refrain an eye roll. “So what is so dire that I needed to travel 4 tiresome hours for?”

He nervously plays with the cuffs of his dress shirt, his own image changed in a second. “I have nothing to wear.”

“What?”

His eyes shift between you and his men uncertain of his reasons and how they might come across.

“What is it you need, San, I don’t have all day. I have a coronation to plan, my own dress as well— if you’re just wasting my time-“

“I want your advice on what to wear at your coronation.”

You glare into his honey eyes and realize he was being genuine. For once. It was quite amusing to see him this vulnerable. He pushes back at his tussled moussed hair before turning away in such shame of his request. You can’t help but giggle, hands behind your back peering over his shoulder on tip toes. He turns his chin out, your faces now inches apart and you decide to tease him despite your racing heart.

“Does almighty San need my help? From a helpless future Queen that he oh-so despises?”

“I never said I despise you.” He retaliates inching closer making you stumble back. “I simply detest your opinions. That’s all.”

“Well you killed my father so—“

“I did not! And soon you’ll find the reason. One day you’ll regret accusing me of such.”

You jut your lips at that. “For your sake, I hope I do.”

You stare into each other eyes with different notions. Both speaking of war but for now you see much different. In fact, you see the world in his eyes; Bright and bold while he stares at you with an unmoving twitch. He blinks once. Then twice till you finally realize you’re caught in each other’s gaze for long enough.

He pulls at his vest promptly before looking away and clearing his throat. “Will you help me or not?”

“Do you really think you’ll make a fool out of yourself at my coronation choosing your own attire?” You scoff unconvinced. “San, you do realize how out of the blue this sounds, right? And you understand my hesitation.”

He pricks at his teeth in clear frustration. “The men attending your party fit the criteria of social exposure. If it’s not already obvious enough, Princess, I lack in social settings. I, at least, deserve a well put together suit.”

It’s nothing but the truth. Because no one invites the royal family of Eden to their events. It’s just not practical. With all the broken treaties, uncertainties his ancestors gathered in the past, San was far from the luxury of being invited. It’s not that they weren’t interested. They were too afraid of what Choi San could do.

An image for an image.

Weird how you want to change that of all people. Even if circumstances prove to be different, you want San to feel welcome. You want San... particularly in close proximity to you..

“They bother you that much?” You dare to ask even if it seems like it’s a sensitive thing to him. His ego not as real as people like to think. “The things people say about you. How they look at you?”

He looks at you again and there’s fire in them you’ve never seen before. Dim and barely causing a singe. “I don’t want my kingdom to suffer the way I do. And if I have to make an image of myself granted the opportunity given, I will.”

Your lip nudges to the side, soft blush forming on your cheeks for no reason at all. “Asking me of my opinion on a suit and tie wont help that, I promise.”

He pouts almost. “Better than what I can concoct. I can’t even tell the difference between velour and velvet.”

“Yet you can tell the difference between a pretty face and an ugly one.” You roll your eyes, arms crossed over you chest.

“I can tell you we’ve both got pretty one’s. If that’s any consolation.”

“Both are not. Don’t kid yourself, San.” You joke bravely taking his arm to escort you forward— a gesture in tradition.

Your relationship with Eden’s King was not strong. It was not positive and it was not given a sturdy foundation. But the way you see him versus the way you feel are two different things set on two different platforms. Issues aside, you would’ve fell face first for San’s odd charms. His perpetual personality besides his dashing good looks— you’d only think of falling for a man like that. And if it’s a King you need, it’d most likely be San you do pursue. That’s no argument. However, that’s not how things were handed to you.

No, when San entered your life, he was nothing but a nuisance. The killer of your terminally ill father. The man who held the key to saving your dying kingdom’s future? Choi San was in full responsibility and he threw that right back at your face. You should hate him. You should loathe him and with every time you see him, you should be livid. You should be off the walls ready to hang him for what it’s worth.

With what time has given you, it’s in fact far from the case. The times you feel like you should throw San in a ditch, you think of hugging him instead. You wish for a smile to form on his face that you shouldn’t want. No, you actually like hearing him taunt you with that forbidden smile of his. You think it’s fun having him tease you. The bothersome choices in words the King of Eden has in effect keens you. King San reels you in like a river fish; aware of it’s death but chooses hunger first. You dove straight for the bait.

Playing coy, like a damsel in distress wanting nothing but his undivided attention.

Fuck you were falling in love with him, you fool.

You two enter a grand room. Grander than your own dressing room, ironically studded in velvet. No extravagant rocks to show and determine wealth but only fabrics of modesty. For someone who couldn’t tell the difference between velour and velvet, he wore the latter very often.

“Good evening, Princess y/n.” His maiden’s greet you kindly as you enter the room in arms link to their King.

You hold a scoff because even his seamstresses were beautiful. He really can tell the difference between an ugly face and a pretty one.

You curtly bow before shooing San away short distance. “Please tell me. How is your King to you? Unwell, rude, obscenely obnoxious?”

Eager to hear a response from that, you jitter. The women seeming taken aback at most but slightly disapproving too.

“Far from it, your grace.” They defend with urgency. “King San is anything but! He’s too kind to us. We forget sometimes we even serve the kingdom.”

Impressed by their sincerity for their King, you glance to San who seemed restless gazing at random materials. He was obviously too dumb to think otherwise. He was still thinking about what he was going to wear to your coronation. Which was, if you think about it, kind of genuine of him.

“We hope to serve you well too, your grace.” They share a quick glance before innocently batting their eyes at you. “What color was your dress, your majesty?”

“M-my dress?” Your quick to receive.

“King San has been refusing any suggestions to a color. He’s insisted we wait for you.” They whisper as if attempting to keep shame for their king.

You whip around to look at an empty-minded San who was roaming around the room, gawking at random textiles like he’s never even seen them before. Obviously still disregarding you.

“He has?”

“It’s beyond our judgement but we’re forced to believe he quite fancies you, your royal highness.”

You nearly choke on air before San’s attention span finally gets recharged. “Oh that’s right, Princess. I was meaning to ask you about the color of your dress.”

Oh my god they were being serious.

You chuckle awkwardly, the girls snickering at the sudden question. “Why is that important right now?”

His lips curl, red and moist from frowning this whole time. “Because I want to know. Is that forbidden?”

“O-of course not.” You stutter back. “I’m just taken aback, that’s all.”

He sulks in his chair, leg bouncing on the floor anxiously. He‘s throwing a temper tantrum right now. He can’t be serious.

You laugh sardonically again bewildered at his action. “San. What on earth are you doing?”

“I’m waiting.”

“For what?”

“For an honest answer.”

Oh my god, he was being fucking serious.

His maidens giggle under their breaths and San was too oblivious to notice the hidden truth to their reaction. At this point you were. And your face was as red as the tomato’s that’s grew in Mingi’s gardens.

Maybe you two were getting too comfortable..

“San, I can’t tell you what color my—“

“I don’t like any of the colors then. They’re not pretty to me.”

You puff in disbelief. “Choi San, you’re not a child. Just because—“

“A child? Who’s acting like a child? I don’t see anyone acting like that here.” His eyes hood when he glares at you. “But the woman in front of me whining and throwing a fit like one may prove otherwise.”

“You have gotta be kidding— oh for fucksake, the color of my dress is gold.”

Almost immediately, San’s eyes scan the table in front of you and instead chooses a fabric hiding in the breasts of his vest. He was faster than the eye can blink and you don’t even get to see the color before he hides it in the hands of his seamstresses. You gasp showing betrayal at his actions.

“I THOUGHT I WAS BEING SUMMONED HERE FOR MY CHOOSING?!”

“Now I want it to be a surprise.”

Perpetual indeed.

“I hate you.” It was your turn to sulk. “I can’t believe you not only disrespect the honors of a woman but her time.”

San scoffs. “So dramatic, princess.”

The maidens gasp in the pause you two make. “Would you look at the time your highness’. We must ready for supper.”

The women now showing shy smiles, giggle on their way out. Finally being free from the public eye, you slap at his thigh obviously annoyed by him acting up all day.

“You are refutable, Choi San, absolutely refutable.” You resist the temptation to punch him till he bleeds. “For someone who claims to detest me, you really take making my life miserable to unspeakable lengths.

“Something I’d want to do often, now that I think about it.”

“How can you think this would be a good time to be cheeky?!”

“Because you always have impeccable reactions, Princess. How could I refuse?” He smirks, his smile definitely going to be the death of you.

p.s rough edit lol

@atinybitofau

[baddyxangel]

well...that was an...experience.

spoiler

ok babies so i finally finished ALL of teen wolf and umm...wow . im gonna go ahead and share my thoughts, i think im gonna split this into 2 posts 1 where i talk about the characters individually and 1 where i just speak in general

6B never happened, I've never heard of it, never seen it, never touched it, never smelled it and i dont think i wanna see anything anymore.

starting with our MC we have scott, the indecisive, pure, irritating, "true alpha". now my problems with scott are honestly just preferrence but still somewhat justified . if you're familiar with comics you know that we always have our hero who believes and tries his best to save EVERYBODY including his enemies, and he is the "if i kill them i'll be just as bad as them" type. now the issue i have with this trope is that its just annoying and naive , I've always been more of a wonder woman type myself personally i dont see this issue with killing 1 person who has killed hundreds or dozens. Scott in most cases is very...bland ? very cookie cutter goody two shoes type, naive and a little bit soft, and for how gassed up true alphas are he is EXTREMELY underwhelming and one is his only saving graces for me is me being attracted to him.

he lets some of the most dangerous people in his universe roam freely because there is a "line" he wont cross and while i get those are his morals and his code i just personally couldnt fuck with it if i was in pack. his innocence meshes more well with ignorance. AND FOR FUCKS SAKE LET THIS MAN BE FUCKING SINGLE

also this was added in post: he's best on screen when he has other people with him to actually show he had some kind of personality besides "me help people" is what I've noticed. specifically stiles, derek and isaac tbh. i think one of my fav scott moments is "im the hot girl 🙂" and isaac saying "yes you are 👍🏽"

Stiles now we all know stiles, the best friend, the brains of the operation, the sarcastic and funny one who lightens the mood. Now stiles is one of my favorites (surprise surprise) because he's not infuriating to me i dont think I've ever been frustrated with mr.stilinski. he's essentially scotts polar opposite but not really if you get what i mean ? idk i love him, moving on.

Allison- i like her. got on my nerves after her coocoo ass momma died but y know. i thought her and scott were cute and i would've liked her to stay alive

Lydia- my favorite banshee, smart, but for some reason is always being taken hostage, attacked, injured, and put into extremely horrifying situations and i dont think i like that.

Kira- personally my fav of scotts Gf's, i think she's cute, right amount of awkward, strong, interesting and i would've loved for her kitsune to have been able to kill somebody. jeff davis obviously did her dirty with her storyline that was apparently finished even though...we still didnt get to learn that much about her powers ? whatever im upset.

Liam- dont like him . moving on. also the long hair didnt grow on me and i dont think it will.

Jackson- eat shit and die.

coach- we love you.

monroe- i could write an entire 2 hour movie script on this hoe. bitch killed 1 hellhound and start feeling ha pussy and thinking she hot shit fuck this lil girl was annoying, moving on before i keep typing.

gerard- you got what the fuck yo old ass had coming to you

peter- we love an anti hero with a sense of humor 💕 and idc he would've wrecked everybody shit in season 1

kate- girl...you are a mess of a hoe. lemme stop there before i write a book on her too.

chris- ily

melissa- someone give her an award ASAP

sherrif- you were very on and off for me

derek- baby i missed you so much, leave scott musty ass and come pack this puss-

dread doctors- these fuckers used to put fear in my soul when i was little

deaton- i dont like how he's used as a plot device.

desert wolf- LMFAOOOO

malia- i like her because she's impulsive but sometimes those impulsive tendecies make me wanna stomp her head in the ground.

deucalion- also used a plot device after his season and then died for no reason. im so sorry for what this show did to you

im missing a lot but if you drop your opinions and names in the replies i'll share my opinion on whoever i missed

Thoughts on Theo? theo- hated his manipulative ass but he is so fine so it hurt me to be screaming and cursing at my tv when he was on screen. originally i was extremely irritated and annoyed when they brought him back cause i dont think he needed to be redeemed like at all, even though i appreciate that i can love him without him being a piece of shit it was unneeded i think . id still fuck him tho

scott pissed me off cause... is theo just a great liar or does scott just hate stiles ? why would he believe theo so easily yet not ask for stiles part of the story ? its like he forgets that stiles doesnt have claws and fangs and shit so of course he's gonna do what he does to survive when y'all can't protect him 🙄 i swear their werewolf hearing only works when the plot needs it too (ik they probably need to focus to enhance their hearing but still it's so annoying-) the season is essentially based on misunderstandings tbh. everyone's lying for no reason at all. but i do like how we actually get to see the effect of their mental health but this is also what i mean when i was talking about scotts fluctuating intelligence and how he's only smart when the plot needs him to be, how does he go from being the dimmest bulb in the box to being able to be in AP biology or whatever class it was. it makes no sense at all

”scott pissed me off cause... is theo just a great liar or does scott just hate stiles? why would he believe theo so easily yet not ask for stiles’ part of the story?” Because Scott McCall is a toxic friend and an even shittier werewolf (he couldn’t even detect Theo’s cheap lies and let himself be played like a fiddle throughout Season 5) And because Stiles doesn’t cater to Scott’s delusions of werewolf Jesus-hood and doesn’t stroke Scott’s ego like Theo does. Scott simply chose to believe the worst of his neurodivergent best friend – the boy who risked his own life to save his whiny ass countless times – because it suited his agenda, and because he’s pissed that Stiles didn’t share his own trauma with him like Scott wanted and demanded. SCOTT: We can’t kill the people that we’re trying to save! There’s always a choice! And yet Scott has no problem conspiring with Deucalion (Boyd and Erica’s murderer) behind everyone’s back to assassinate Josh and Tracy AND trying (but failing) to kill Gerard – selling Derek and his Pack out to the hunters, violating Derek, and using Derek as his own personal murder weapon to achieve that – just because “He threatened my mom! I had no choice!” A True Hypocrite indeed

[cherubsoda]

Wait, FUCK. There was a roasting game. One of your f/os is an indigo incel who, let’s be honest, looks like the type of self-entitled dolt that makes fun of everyone who disagrees with him (even when he is aware that he is wrong; which, of-course, he’d never admit, because of his fragile ego) and, despite calling everyone ‘way too sensitive’, he writes a blog-post on how incels are ‘discriminated’ against by chads and ‘femoids’ on reddit or 4chan every time someone looks at him funny.

Also he looks like he can’t handle spicy food and will call you a slur if you don’t go out on a date with him. He probably holds discourse on the most frivolous of things. If you are winning an argument online, instead of being mature he will just start looking for grammatical faults and try to deflect the subject. He looks like he’d post on Facebook about how high an online quiz stated that his intellect is and will call you a troglodyte if you say that quizzes literally don’t mean much.

this is so fucking funny im fucking sweating. all of this is fucking true, legitimately canon. he keeps lowbloods in his house that cant perform basic necessities of caring for themselves, if you call him out in it he gets all butthurt and i hate it. literally dont condone ANYTHING he does. he fetishizes lowbloods and is fake woke, clout chases, will bully you off the internet, and he'll get away with all of it.

He'd complain that i didnt pay the bill when he would INSIST on paying, would rant ab how Feminine Presenting People should shave their arm/leg hair (if they have any to begin with). Tries to be some hero by saying "you look better without makeup" and proceeds to call me 'busted' when i take it off.

I have to say, the most disappointing thing that's been implied is that he's my f/o- this is where I gotta draw the line, buster. At this point, I hate him so much that if he died I'd re-fucking-joice (thank you so much Marvus' route). He's es basically a character i should've blacklisted but instead i parade him around like a damn idiot.

Kismesissitude should have some semblance of 'trust' that the other person wouldnt stomp the other to death but I cant promise i wont! there should also be some respect which i have 0 of. I've tried finding SOMETHING to make this chucklefuck redeemable, just ANYTHING - the only thing saving him is ME - if I so desire to place myself in this predicament- I'm his only Saving Grace; truly what a powermive in my behalf. With or without me he's worthless and absolute garbage, but with me, he has Something. Not saying I have plenty of worth but anything higher than bottom of the barrel is better than nothing. Should I save him from demise? Perhaps not. I'd be a fool to - however we all know I Am The Biggest Fool of them all. I keep him, simply because he makes me Look Better. I'm not sadist in the slightest but every bone and muscle in my body rejects his zebra mannerisms and quirks.

tldr: hate this guy to the point its not even Kismesissitude- i just want him gone

[hobiorbit]

teacher, teacher I

pairing: kim seokjin x reader warnings: future smut, reader is younger than jin by a year, mentions of alcohol, crude language, future smut probably summary: in which kim seokjin is not a dumbass, math is just something only weird people get the hang of.

Kim Seokjin is not a dumbass.

He rejects this entire notion, always getting too flustered and angry to even refute the argument, leaving himself panting and red in the face from trying to defend himself.

There is nothing inherently wrong with being behind in a subject or two. It happened to a lot of people, and Kim Seokjin is neither the first, nor will he be the last to fail a math class. Anyways, it’s not as big of a deal as everyone (including his parents and his a-hole friends,) makes it out to be.

This is what Seokjin repeats to himself as he walks into the same math class he did on the first day of school the year before, greeted with a multitude of people a year younger than him- some were even two years younger, the math wizards.

“It’s good to see you again, Mr. Kim.” His old math teacher, Ms. Choi had said when he walked past her desk. He grunted a somewhat polite greeting back, trying to calm the flames crawling up his neck when he heard a couple kids whisper and repeat the word ‘again?’ Yes, again, you smart fucks!

“Your seat is next to Y/N, the girl in the front on the right. I expect this will be the last year I’ll be seeing you, right Mr. Kim?” The teacher asked him as he gripped his backpack strap tighter in anger in embarrassment.

“I hope so, Ms. Choi.” Seokin grits, turning on his heel to walk to the front of his classroom, zeroing in on the head of hair the old woman pointed out. It looked healthy. That was Seokjin’s first impression.

His second impression, simplified, was holy fuck. Seokjin had seen plenty of beautiful people in his life, himself included, but you were on an entire different level. He’d need to make an entirely new schema just to categorize you.

Your eyes were wide and beautiful as you looked at him in surprise, tearing your earbuds from your ears when he plopped down in the desk next to you. He muttered an apology for startling you, partly because he felt bad and partly because he wanted to put a voice to this pretty face of yours.

“It’s okay. I should’ve expected the seat to be taken anyway… I’m Y/N, I suppose we’re seatmates.” You smiled kindly. Seokjin returned your smile, stretching his full lips in reciprocation to ease your anxiety. He was nothing if not a gentleman.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Seokjin, my friends call me Jin. You can too if you want.” Seokjin replied, setting his backpack down beside him after taking out his way too expensive calculator and his trusty pencil he’d managed to keep for the last two years, an amazing feat for him. Hoseok had accused him of sorcery, as most days the other boy could barely keep track of the same pencil for the entire day.

Before you could say anything else, Ms. Choi had gotten straight to teaching. Seokjin sighed, silently berating his past self for making him sit through another year with the woman. She wasn’t an inherently bad person- just one of those hardass teachers that somehow prided themselves on getting kids to hate them. Seokjin refused to feed into her complex, constantly trying to pretend everything she did wasn’t a bother to him.

You, on the other hand, seemed hardly bothered at all. You took everything she said with grace, answering each question she threw at you easily when she thought you weren’t paying attention. Choi thought she’d won by sitting you next to the abnormally attractive upperclassman, but you seemed to be fine. Seokjin was respectful, but partner projects were shared grades.

“How do you understand this?” Seokjin asked you, two full weeks after the school year had started. It was now his second time going over this material and it was just as confusing as the first. You shrugged, turning to smile at him. Everyone was looking over their scores on their first test of the year, and the paper Jin was holding had him sagging into his seat.

“I don’t know. Guess I just do.” You answered honestly with a small shrug as Seokjin looked at you incredulously. Ms. Choi had shushed the both of you after she heard Seokjin’s voice, causing a couple other kids in the class to snicker. You hardly minded, but didn’t miss the way Jin’s eyes rolled.

The bell ringing was like a saving grace for the older boy. He slung his backpack over his shoulder and crumpled his test up in his free hand, a silent ‘fuck you’ to the test and the teacher who’d administered it. You held in a soft laugh at his behavior, silently watching him leave the classroom as you packed up your things.

-

“You already failed your first test? Man, that’s tough. My little sister is two years younger than us and she’s taking the same level math as you are.” Taehyung, one of Jin’s snob friends said when he caught wind of the events that happened in his classes that day.

Seokjin turned to give the other boy a pointed glare, telling him nothing he was saying was funny and he’d be sorely mistaken if he thought Jin wouldn’t beat up him and his sister.

“Alright, alright. Stop it. Taehyung, there’s no point in bragging about your smart family member, it doesn’t make you any less dumb- and Jin, we don’t solve problems with violence.” Namjoon said, touching the frame of his glasses and pushing them up his nose.

“He kind of has to solve problems with violence if he can’t solve ‘em with his brain.” Jungkook mumbled, but everyone had heard it. Seokjin threw his head back into the plush backing of his couch, harnessing every ounce of will left inside of him to not snap everyone else in two.

“Dick move, Jeon. Don’t forget I can tell everyone at school you have a pencil dick and your pits smell. See how far you’ll get after that.” Jin grunted with his eyes clothes, but not hearing how Hoseok burst into a fit of laughter at his comments.

“Whatever! That’s not true, anyway- and I didn’t mean it, Jin. We all know you’re not stupid. Last thing you’ll need in real life is the law of syllogism.” Jungkook reassured his friend. Seokjin knew his friends didn’t actually think of him as stupid- anything but, actually, but it didn’t completely placate the feeling of inferiority welling within him.

“I get it.” Seokjin mumbled. Jimin sighed from beside him, sensing that Seokjin wasn’t feeling too well. “Just ask someone for help. I’m sure Namjoon would. I might, too, but I’m not that good at explaining things.” Yoongi piped up from across the living room, appearing to be slumped into the expensive recliner Jin’s dad had recently bought.

Namjoon nodded at the notion. “Yeah. I don’t mind helping at all.” He offered. Seokjin would’ve taken him up on it if his ego wasn’t so damaged beyond repair already. Instead he waved his hand.

“This is my problem. There’s no way I can fail a class twice, I just need to study. And maybe get a new teacher. Choi sucks ass.” Seokjin pondered aloud. Yeah, there was no way his lack of success was all him. Choi deserves some blame, too. It was only fair considering how much grief she’d given Jin over the last year.

The other boys shrugged, figuring they’d done everything they could to contribute to the catastrophe that was the part of Jin’s brain in charge of math. Slowly, the conversation moved to topics more their speed, including, but not limited to video games, Jungkook’s pencil dick, and, oh, Seokjin’s hot mom. He really couldn’t catch a break.

-

“You’re reading too much into this, and you’re not even me.” You told your best friend, Yerim, as you walked down the hall to your first class of the day- the one you shared with Seokjin. Yerim gasped at your notion, shaking her head dutifully.

“No, you just aren’t taking this as seriously as you need to. Seriously, Y/N, that’s the hottest guy in school and you’re math partners with him. And he talks to you. Like, willingly.” Yerim explained with an exasperated tone. You arched an eyebrow at her.

“Thanks for making it sound like any attractive guy actually wanting to talk to me is some natural phenomenon, Yeri. You really know how to keep me humble.” You grunted, not actually feeling offended by her words. You’d known the other girl long enough to know she was blunt, and her way with words wasn’t exactly poetic. But she was your Yeri.

“Someone has to!” She laughed before continuing on. “But seriously, Y/N, you need to explore this new opportunity. Or at least send him my way if you don’t want him. Girl code or whatever.” She spoke as you veered off to your classroom, nodding to her words absentmindedly while only halfway processing them. Seokjin had beat you here today, his beautiful head of chestnut hair greeting you as you walked into the cold air of your math class.

Class today seemed especially hard for Jin, who was groaning to himself every time Ms. Choi announced an answer to a problem that he didn’t get. You frowned, wanting to lean over and correct his simple mistakes. However, you weren’t sure if you should- you didn’t want him to get mad at you, or make him feel bad for getting help from someone who was younger than him.

As class ended, you made moves to clean up your things, packing away your math binder before Ms. Choi shrilly called out to you and Seokjin. Your blood ran cold, and you wondered what you could’ve done wrong that day.

“Yes?” You asked hurriedly, setting your backpack down on the ground beside you as Seokjin hung around with a sigh, letting his arms fall limply at his sides. You smiled at his actions, at least he didn’t want to be here either.

“I have a request of you. Mr. Kim here is not doing so well, and it’s a pity considering this is the second time I’ve had the pleasure of teaching him. So I’ve taken it upon myself to arrange a surefire way to get Mr. Kim on track. Y/N, you will be tutoring Seokjin here until his grades are good- not just passing.” She said with finality, leaving no room for either you or Seokjin to argue. Seokjin looked like he was about to, but Ms. Choi continued.

“Y/N, your incentive will be extra credit and no final in this class. Seokjin, your incentive is to graduate. Understood? I will leave meeting arrangements up to the two of you, but just know you’ll have to meet up more than just once a week in order to accomplish anything. That will be all, you two.” The teacher dismissed you, turning around and going back to her desk without sparing either of you a second glance.

You gave Seokjin a weak smile as he stared ahead with a frown on his face. When you two got out into the hallway- which was practically barren, due to most of the students having already left- you attempted to talk to the older boy.

“I’m sorry.” You offered. Your words were genuine even though they didn’t have to be, and Seokjin looked at you in surprise before shaking his head quickly.

“If there’s anyone who should apologize right now, it’s me. It’s my dumbass who got you stuck with tutoring me.” Seokjin sighed. You smiled and shook your own head, looking at him fondly.

“It’s cute of you to assume I wouldn’t like tutoring you. Who says math can’t be fun?” You said boldy, inwardly cringing at your own words. Not only had you called him cute, but you also inadvertently said math was fun- which is not true, by the way. Even you knew that.

Seokjin smirked at your words, giving you a once over (which made you feel more flushed than you cared to admit,) before nodding. “I guess you’re right. Here,” He said, digging in his pocket before pulling out his phone, unlocking it and then setting it into your hand. “Put your number in. That way we can get ahold of each other.” Seokjin said. You nodded, typing your name in and putting a few cute emojis beside it before adding your number and handing it back to Seokjin.

The boy smiled at how cute you were, putting emojis next to your contact. It stood out against everything else, as it was very rare of him to adorn contact names with anything like that. The closest thing he had was Jungkook’s costume name- which was just dumbass.

He sent you a text from his phone, a silly joke just so you’d have his number. You giggled as you saved his contact.

“Text me and let me know when you’re free next. I’d do it tonight, but my friends have a soccer game tonight and I promised I’d go…” He trailed off, almost seeming to ponder something before shaking his head, deciding it wasn’t something that needed to be said. “Anyway, I can probably tweak my schedule to meet yours. You’re probably busier with school and other stuff than I am, anyway.” He said nonchalantly. You smiled at how considerate the older boy was being, nodding sweetly at his words.

“Sure, I’ll do that. Have fun tonight, Seokjin.” You said softly, waving him goodbye as he walked into the parking lot to his car. You stood by the curb, waiting for your usual ride to pull up, who just happened to be one of your best friends.

“Hi, Yukhei.” You smiled at him as you clambered into the front seat of his car. He sent you his signature wide smile, turning his loud music down to greet you. “What’s up, sweetness? You took longer than you usually do today.” Yukhei said as he put his car in drive, backing up before driving out of the parking lot. You observed Seokjin as he drove past you, sending you a wink. You frowned and uttered an apology to your friend.

“Sorry… I didn’t think I’d be. My teacher held me and another guy back after class and, well, long story short, I’m a tutor now. Against my will.” You added the last part, because Yukhei was totally a guy who would tease you about wanting to be a math tutor. Not that it mattered- he barely passed geometry in tenth grade. Yukehi hummed thoughtfully.

“That sucks. What’s his name?” He asked out of curiosity. You knew Yukhei hardly paid attention to anyone in your grade, having befriended just about everyone in all other grade levels. It was a miracle he talked to you.

“Kim Seokjin.” You said, screaming when Yukhei’s car came to a sudden halt. Another car swerved past you, honking and giving him a not so nice finger sign. “What’re you doing? You’re gonna get us killed!” You whimpered, clutching your chest over the soft material of the sweater you were wearing. Yukehi hardly seemed bothered, slowly turning back to normal as he continued the route home.

“Y/N, are you kidding me? Kim Seokjin is one of the most popular guys in school. Hell, he’s one of the most popular guys in the district. Your social rep is about to go through the roof! What’s he like? I’ve only heard stories.” Yukhei said in awe, only taking his eyes off you every couple of seconds to make sure he was still driving on the right side of the road.

“Please keep your eyes on the road before I die prematurely,” You whined pitifully before continuing. “And, you’ve only heard stories? Geeze, way to make him sound like some mythical creature. I don’t really know what you want me to say… We really just sit next to each other in math. He’s nice, and funny I guess.” You said. You really wanted to comment on how handsome he was too, but you figured Yukhei had heard enough of that from every other person he knew.

Yukehi sucked in a couple deep breaths to curb his excitement. “You’ve gotta get me on his good side, Y/N. This is crazy, I always knew there was a reason I kept you around! Well, beside your ass- you’re pretty funny too, I guess.” Yukhei shrugged as you slapped his arm, which was protected by the expensive windbreaker he wore.

“Stop saying things like that! It makes me uncomfortable and I don’t know how to react. And no, I’m not using him to get you into parties or something. Climb the social chain on your own, like the pioneers once did.” You scolded him as he laughed.

“You know I hate manual labor. Why do you think I didn’t clean my room for two years straight?” Yukhei asked as you shivered at the memory. It started in eighth grade, and Yukhei didn’t clean his room until the end of your freshman year of high school.

You shook your head. “Don’t remind me. I remember that fossilized sock. It got so bad you had to give me your allowance just so I’d help.” You grumbled, crossing your arms and glaring at the memory. His measly ten bucks a week would never be enough for the horrors you went through during that time.

Yukhei rolled his eyes, mumbling something about you being a drama queen. You shrugged, hardly bothered, opting to listen to his music as he continued your route home.

When he pulled into your driveway, you expected him to leave and go to his own house. However, he ended up stopping his car and smiling deviously when you looked at him in question.

“You’re free tonight, right?” Yukhei asked as he strolled into your house behind you, shrugging off his jacket and taking off his shoes as he did the same. You peered at him wearily squinting your eyes.

“...Why? Yukhei, I’m not doing your homework for you again. It’s not that hard. And I don’t want to.” You pouted. His mouth dropped in offense, slapping a hand onto his chest to let you know that he wasn’t pleased with your assumption.

“You’re the worst! For your information, that’s not what I was going to ask you anyway. I got invited to a cool party tonight and I wanted you to be my plus one.” Yukhei said snobbily, tilting his nose into the air.

You grimaced, thinking about how that was the last thing you wanted to do. You’d rather stay home, as sad as it sounded- you’d heard horror stories from the types of parties Yukhei’s crowd went to, and you weren’t familiar with anyone who went to them beside him.

“I don’t know, Yukhei. That’s really not my type of thing. You’d have better luck asking someone else.” You said in resignment, walking up the stairs to your room as he followed behind you, moaning and groaning at your answer.

“You never wanna do anything fun! Why don’t you want to go? It’s a Friday night, any homework you have can be done tomorrow or Sunday.” Yukhei said, belly flopping onto your made bed.

You dropped your backpack down to your side, going to your desk and sitting in the spinning chair and facing the boy on your bed, who was giving you the side eye.

“I don’t want to go because it doesn’t sound fun. I won’t know anyone there beside you- and knowing the social butterfly you are, you’ll end up leaving my side right when we get there. And before you promise me that you’ll stay with me, I’ll feel bad because I’ll most definitely be keeping you from doing something actually enjoyable.” You shrugged. Everything got difficult when you two started growing into different social groups.

Yukhei had always been popular. You weren’t unpopular, people knew you and enjoyed talking to you, but it was a different kind of recognition. Yukhei and you were tied at the hip for most of your lives, and once puberty started hitting him he began prospering as you watched him proudly, from the comfort of your smaller social circle. Things were different now, and it was sometimes hard to work through.

He frowned, eyebrows creasing together in the telltale emotion of worry.

“Do you really feel like that, Y/N? Hon, the most fun I could ever have is with you. Don’t think for even a second that I’d enjoy anyone else’s company more. I want you to go because I wanna hang out with you, make new memories or whatever. I’m not doing it out of pity, or whatever might be going on in that head of yours.” He said seriously, his tone dropping to let you know his words were genuine. You smiled at him, tilting your head.

“Aw, Yukehi’s got a soft spot for little old Y/n.” You giggled as he cursed and shook his head. “Yeah, whatever- well now that we’ve talked through that, it’s time to pick your outfit! I heard this is supposed to be a real banger- the super popular upperclassmen are coming.” Yukehi said, jumping up from your bed and rubbing his hands together in contemplation.

“I never said I was going!” You said indignantly, to which he rolled his eyes in response.

“Doesn’t matter. I decided that you are. Where do you keep your dresses?” Yukhei asked, pulling out random drawers to your dresser and snickering when he found your underwear drawer, picking a pair of panties up and flinging them to you as you gasped in embarrassment.

“Boundaries, Yukhei!” You said in shrill embarrassment, balling up the fabric in your hand and pushing him away from the piece of furniture he was rifling through. “And I keep them in the closet, duh.” You sneered, gently placing your underwear back where they were supposed to be as Yukhei huffed some laughter.

“Alright, let’s see what I have to work with. You’re lucky you’re already pretty fashionable and I don’t have to go through the hassle of one of those movie transformations.” Yukhei hummed as slid his hand in between the garments of clothing hung up in your closet, inspecting each one and taking some out when they seemed to meet his made up requirements.

“Try these two on. I think I know what I’m gonna choose but I have to be sure.” Yukhei demanded, throwing the two dresses he picked out onto your bed.

“Aye aye captain?” You questioned, picking them up and travelling to the bathroom before putting one of the garments on, surprising yourself when you looked in the mirror. In all fairness, you’d forgotten you owned it- a nice lightly colored pattern with a skirt that puffed out at the waist, accentuating your figure nicely. You’d always enjoyed the dress but always ended up admiring it from afar, never really having the chance to wear it.

Yukhei whistled as you walked back into the room, holding his finger up and drawing an imaginary circle to silently tell you to turn around for him. You spun around, watching in amusement as the skirt following your movements, wind fluffing up the ruffled edges. Yukhei smiled approvingly.

“You’ll be wearing that one tonight.” He decided as he continued to observed you as you smiled. “You don’t want to see the other one on?” You questioned.

“Don’t need to,” He answered. “This looks stunning on you, and if the other one could look even better I’d have to be your personal bodyguard tonight- which is something I’d like to avoid, but it can’t be helped.” The boy explained as you sat next to him.

“What do you mean it can’t be helped?” You questioned out of pure curiosity as he raised an eyebrow at you, accompanied by a deadpan expression.

“Really sick of the whole ‘girl doesn’t know how beautiful she actually is,’ trope, Y/N. You’re hot, people will try to make moves on you tonight.” He said nonchalantly as you felt your skin begin to heat up with embarrassment.

You shook your head haughtily. “No way. No one’s ever done that before, tonight won’t be any different.” You nodded to your own words, trying to agree with what you were telling yourself. Yukhei scoffed, sending a hand down onto your back. It didn’t hurt, but it shocked you enough.

“You haven’t given anyone the chance, sweetheart. You really think the kids who sit in the library during lunch are gonna make a move on you? It’s a party, Y/N, a social event. They’ll be like moths to a flame.” He spoke, and you grimaced but didn’t find yourself disagreeing. It sounded intimidating, but a bit flattering.

“Whatever you say…” You mumbled, to which Yukhei smiled as he congratulated himself for winning the argument. “Go do your hair or makeup or whatever.” He commanded you as you looked at him incredulously.

“The party’s not until tonight!” You exclaimed while Yukhei shrugged casually.

“I know girls who skipped school today to get ready. Plus, we have to stop at my house so I can change. You think I’d show up to a party looking like this?” Yukhei signalled to the outfit he wore as you blinked slowly. There wasn’t anything wrong with it. You thought he looked good.

“...I guess not?” You questioned as your friend smiled. “Good answer, Y/N.”

-

“You said this was supposed to start at seven.” You pointed out dejectedly when you’d checked your phone. Yukhei had parked a couple houses down, giving you time to observe your surroundings as you walked up the street. Cars littered the neighborhood and you could already hear the bass of the music playing inside of the large house. This person must’ve had very understanding neighbors.

“Yeah, Y/N, fashionably late. Ever heard of it? We’d look dumb if we came when it was actually supposed to start.” Yukhei pointed out as you creased your eyes in confusion. “But it’s almost 9 already…” You trailed off, wrapping your arms around your waist as you slowly grew more conscious of the outfit you were wearing.

Yukhei scoffed. “Exactly. But if you’re so concerned… Hurry up.” He chided, grabbing your arm and practically dragging you up the steps of the house, which was covered in red solo cups and some people who were smoking, or got started on the alcohol too early and were lazing around in the fresh air. A couple of the patrons noticed Yukhei, raising their hands in a wave accompanies by sly smiles.

Yukhei nodded curtly toward them but said nothing, so you decided not to acknowledge them.

The house was almost filled to the brim. People were everywhere and the music was so loud you could barely hear your own thoughts, and the air was so hazy you almost wondered if people were smoking inside as well. If they were, you couldn’t smell it, as it seemed to be covered by the copious amounts of perfumes and colognes everyone wore.

“Follow me.” Yukhei leaned down and spoke into your ear so you could hear him. You nodded at him with slightly light eyes, following him as he wove through the crowds of people.

Somehow you ended up in the kitchen, lights dimmed to keep the lowlit effect that had been apparent since you’d arrived. There were multiple bowls of snacks, and in the middle of one of the large tables was a huge bowl of suspicious red looking liquid. You shivered, wondering what all had been put into it. It seemed to be popular, as the other people in the kitchen went immediately to it, refilling their cups.

Yukhei went over and got a cup, grabbing the ladle and pouring a small amount into it before going over to the sink and filling the rest of it with water. You raised an eyebrow at him before he thrust it into your own hand, smiling proudly.

“Drink it. There’s barely any alcohol in it and I’m not drinking tonight so there’s nothing to worry about. Despite the anxiety blooming in your chest and willing you to refuse the liquid, you raised it to your mouth and took a sip. Your eyebrows shot up immediately at the sweet, fruity taste that flooded your mouth. Your friend smiled even wider.

“You like it?” He asked excitedly, biting the side of his lip. You looked down into the cup, still slightly surprised at how someone had managed to make alcohol taste so good. “Yeah, I like it a lot actually…” You trailed off, taking another sip.

“A guy named Taehyung is usually in charge of the jungle juice. He’s the only one who doesn’t fuck it up, but makes it capable of doing something. And hey, slow down. I watered it down so you’d take your time, but I’ve got you.” Yukhei said, grabbing the hand that was wrapped around the cup and pulling it down so it was level with your belly button. You smiled sheepishly.

The two of you made your way out of the kitchen, you looking around in wonder as Yukhei drank in your reactions. He was happy to see you breaking out of your shell a bit, letting go of your own personal rules and trusting him enough to have fun with him.

“Aye, Yukhei! Bring your girl over here, we’re playing beer pong.” A tall handsome boy hollered from a couple feet over. They were standing in what seemed to be a secondary dining room, two obvious teams stood at different sides of the large table. It was covered in red solo cups, but instead of beer they were filled with the infamous jungle juice.

Yukhei looked at you questioningly to which you nodded shortly, following him over to the table. There was only one other girl who seemed to want nothing to do with the game, but she smiled at you nonetheless. She didn’t seem threatening in any manner, which was nice.

“What’s up, Yukhei? Who’s the pretty little lady?” The guy who called you over smiled. He had dark brown hair and olive skin, smiling down at you with a rectangular smile that showed his shining teeth.

“This is one of my best friends. Her name’s Y/N. Y/N, this is Taehyung. He’s in the year above us.” Yukhei said, managing to point out that you two were not an item like the other boy might have assumed. Taehyung’s eyes showed pleasant surprise, his smile widening as he caught a glimpse of your cup.

“Like it? Made it just for you, you know.” He said as he gestured toward your cup. You smiled shyly but still managed to respond slyly. “I’m sure- I’m surprised you knew I was coming, and made all of that punch just for me.” You smiled, sipping at the liquid again as both he and Yukhei laughed.

“Hey,” a lazy voice called from the other end of the table. He had slanted eyes that stared right at you, his tongue peeking out to wet the corner of his lips. “Stop flirting with the poor girl and get this game started. It’s nine o’clock and I’m not even tipsy, it’s a shame.” He said, making you snort. Yukhei looked at you and shrugged, letting you know that this behavior wasn’t out of the norm.

“Yoongi’s a super nice guy. Probably the one I’d trust most around here.” Yukhei murmured to you as they began to set up their game. Taehyung has called Yukhei to be on his team, and you politely declined, leaving you to awkwardly stand beside the table and watch the first couple of throws before the other girl noticed you.

“Come here.” She said gently, and you immediately obeyed.

“You looked a little lost, and I’ve never seen you around one of these things before. I’m Jisoo, what’s your name?” She asked you as you nodded. “Yeah… Yukhei’s been one of my best friends for years now, and I guess tonight was the night he decided he had enough and brought me to a party. Oh, and I’m Y/N.”

Jisoo smiled at your words, nodding understandingly. She was well aware her crowd wasn’t for anyone, but it was always nice to see a new face. Especially when the new face didn’t seem to have any preconceived notions of ‘popular kids.’

“Well, I hope you have fun tonight, Y/N. You can always sit with us too if Yukhei gets too rowdy. Do you know anyone else here?” She asked out of curiosity. You furrowed your eyebrows and raised your head to get a good look of the other patrons of the party.

“No, I don’t think so… Oh! Seokjin!” You said in surprise, causing Jisoo’s face to morph into a look of shock. “Seokjin…?” She asked, turning her head to look for the boy. He seemed to see you at the same time you saw him. His features reflected surprise, but he snapped out of it and sent you a wave and a smile.

“How do you know Seokjin? He hardly ever comes to these things, that’s so odd…” Jisoo trailed off. Her tone held no malice or jealousy, simply surprise that you of all people would know Seokjin. Even Yukhei had never managed to talk to him before.

“Oh,” You said, wondering what you should say. You were sure he wouldn’t appreciate it if you told people that you were his math tutor despite being younger than him. “I share a class with him and we sit next to each other.” You said finally, nodding your head. Jisoo seemed to believe you, eyes still focused on Seokjin as he weaved his way through the crowd. He had two people with him, but it was very clear he was walking in your group’s direction.

“Jinnie! To who do we owe our pleasure?” Taehyung asked excitedly, stopping mid throw to greet Seokjin. Yukhei had a look of awe on his face from behind Taehyung and Yoongi threw a ping pong ball at Taehyung.

“Blame this one. He wouldn’t leave my house without me.” Jin said, jabbing a finger over his shoulder at a smiling boy, who was already bouncing around. You could tell that this was completely his element- a party animal. The other one who accompanied them smiled, hooded eyes trailing over everyone before stopping on you, grinning widely.

“And who are you, sweetheart?” He asked, paying Jisoo no mind as he strolled over to you. His voice was a bit higher than the other boy’s but still had a gravelly quality to it, practically hypnotizing you. You were silent for a moment, thinking Jisoo would come to save you but she only ignored him, leaving you to your own devices.

“Oh, um… I’m Y/N?” You asked more than answered, wondering if that was really what he wanted to know. His eyes shone with interest and you felt like you’d fallen into the lion’s den. “Nice to meet you. I’m Jimin. Say… I haven’t seen you at one of these before. What’s the special occasion?” He asked again. Jisoo got up and walked over to where Yoongi’s team stood, and you could see her whisper into his ear. His eyes followed the situation, watching carefully.

“Well, my best friend Yukhei. He’s over there. He wanted me to come.” You shrugged your shoulders, feeling cold in the dress you wore. Jimin occupied the seat Jisoo left open now, no longer obscuring your frontal view. Seokjin hadn’t taken notice to Jimin, and if he did he didn’t seem to care.

“Mmm, Yukhei, really? Surprising that someone like him is friends with a sweet girl like you.” He said nonchalantly, making you confused. “Someone like him? What does that mean?” You asked, folding your hands in your lap and looking down at them, finding his presence almost suffocating. He was absolutely stunning, but you knew he could only offer you trouble.

“Well, the crowd he hangs out with, sweetheart. There’s no doubt he’s popular, but there’s always more to that, isn’t there? I won’t ruin anything for you. But if you stick around I might have to steal from him, you’re entirely tempting. You know that, don’t you?” Jimin asked you, bringing a finger under your chin and tilting it his way, having you look at him. This seemed to be the final straw for whoever had been watching, because you heard Yoongi’s voice immediately after.

“Enough, Jimin. You’re scaring her.” Yoongi said authoritatively, causing him to glower at the black haired boy. Seokjin seemed to hear the commotion, because he looked over at you only to grow surprised at the position Jimin had managed to get him in. When Jimin didn’t move, Jin stalked over and grabbed his hand tightly before moving it away.

Jimin got up and followed Jin, who was muttering something about you being off limits. You wondered what that meant. Yukhei jogged over to you, face clearly showing his panic. “Are you okay? I didn’t even notice anything. He didn’t make you uncomfortable, right?” He asked, hands on your shoulders as he looked into your eyes concerningly.

You shook your head and smiled up at your friend. “No Yukhei, I’m okay. He’s just a flirt, that’s all.” You shrugged, not wanting him to get even more worried. You also didn’t want to make the situation seem bigger than it was, you hadn’t told Jimin to stop and he didn’t do anything crazy. He just kept you on your toes.

Yukhei seemed conflicted, but nodded. “I’m gonna get back to the game, then. If something like that happens again tell them no and get me.” Yukhei said with finality. You saluted him, to which he laughed and shook his head.

It had been a couple of minutes before you heard your name being said again. You looked up and around, wondering where it came from before you saw Seokjin, who was motioning for you to come over to him. You got up and righted your dress before walking over.

“Hi!” You said happily, missing the way his eyes trailed over you hungrily. He smiled at you sweetly, bringing his hand down to encase your own. “Come with me?” He asked, to which you nodded. The boy led you through a couple of halls before you were met with some glass doors, which led to the house’s back porch. There were people outside, but hardly any compared to the inside of the house.

“How was the soccer game?” You asked when the both of you stopped next to the porch’s railing. He smiled at your ability to remember what he told you. “It was good. They won, so I guess it was worth going to. I guess we could’ve met up afterward but I didn’t think you’d be up this late…” He said, alluding to the party the two of you were now at. You began to fluster at his words.

“Ah…! I didn’t know I’d be here either, to be completely honest. Yukhei dragged me out, parties aren’t really my thing. This is my first one, actually!” You said a bit loudly, completely unaware at how lame you were making yourself sound. Jin let out a warm chuckle.

“Don’t worry Y/N, I can tell you’re not the party type. Which brings me to the reason why I wanted to talk to you.” Seokjin said. You tilted your head, fiddling with the hem of your dress. “And what is that?” You asked quietly, feeling small under his gaze.

His facial expression was weird, to say the least. He seemed almost mournful, and it had you feeling saddened before you could even hear what he had to say.

“You shouldn’t be here, Y/N. You’re too good for this type of stuff.” Jin sighed as you looked at him in apparent confusion. “I’m definitely not better than anyone here if that’s what you’re saying.” You said, not wanting him to put you on a pedestal for no reason. He reached down for your hand again, bringing it up to rest against his on the railing. Your heart sped up at the contact.

“That’s not quite what I meant. Excuse the brashness but… You’re stunning. People here are well aware of that, and if they’re not jealous they’re gonna find a way to get you themselves, like Jimin earlier. You’re innocent and unaware of people’s intentions and it makes you desirable, and I’ll be damned if I sit around and let someone take advantage of you.” Seokjin murmured quietly to avoid anyone else hearing him, but you could hear the anger in his tone.

“Oh, Seokjin, I don’t want you to worry about me. I promise I can take care of myself, and I know trouble when I see it.” You tried to assure him, but you could see that the conflict in his eyes hadn’t lessened.

“I think your heart is in the right place- too much, probably. EVen if you smell trouble you’ll try to look for the good in someone, like you did with Jimin.” Seokjin spoke, and you became aware that it wasn’t going to be easy to change his mind.

“But…” You trailed off in confusion, eyebrows drawing together and bottom lip jutting out as Seokjin resisted the urge to coo at you and swipe his thumb across your mouth. “Aren’t you and Jimin friends?” You asked, in reference to the way he spoke of the other boy. He sucked in a breath through his teeth, and you saw his wide shoulders raise with the intake.

“We are,” He finally spoke. “But if anything, that just shows that I know what type of person he is. He’s good to me, but I know what he does, and I’d prefer it if he didn’t do it with someone like you- for both of our sakes.” Seokjin spoke as you felt embarrassment blooming within you, knowing exactly what the older boy was referencing to. Of course you were aware some boys and girls had reputations for ‘sleeping around’- you just didn’t think it was ever something that should be made into a big deal.

“Have you told them… What I am, for you?” You whispered quietly, not wanting to alert anyone around you in fear of embarrassing Seokjin. He huffed out some endearing laughter. “Can’t say I’m exactly excited to say that the cute underclassman girl I hang around with is actually my math teacher. I’ll tell them eventually, though- to avoid some confusion that’s bound to arise. I don’t really hang around girls too often, so they’ll get curious.” You smiled at his words, eyes creasing with the excess skin of your cheeks.

“Sounds good.” You told him. It looked like Seokjin was about to continue but was shocked out of replying when a large hand clapped over his shoulder, another man appearing from behind him. He had a wide smile, and he was holding a red solo cup. The flush of his cheeks told you that he definitely wasn’t sober.

“My man Seokjin! Where’d you get this hot piece of ass? I didn’t think the underclassmen were all that, but you’re changing my mind, you know?” He asked as he driected the conversation to you. You couldn’t respond, eyes open wide at the brashness of his comments. Seokjin seemed less than pleased, ripping his hand from his shoulder and shoving him off.

“None of your fucking business, Yunho- say one more thing and I’ll get my dad to fire yours.” Seokjin threatened emptily, but it was very obvious that the inebriated male didn’t catch the hint. His eyes widened and he put his hands up in defense. “Sorry, man. Didn’t mean it.” He slurred, beelining for the door to the inside. You watched the door even after he disappeared into it.

“I’m sorry, Y/N…” Seokjin trailed off as you began to shake your head in response. He wasn’t looking at you, though, so it went unnoticed. “I think it’s best if I drive you home. You okay with that?” He asked. You hesitated, mind flashing back to Yukhei.

“Yukhei was my ride… I was supposed to stay with him.” You spoke anxiously as Jin listened. “You shouldn’t worry. We left him alone with Taehyung, he’s probably less than sober by now. We can swing through and you can tell him bye before we go, if you want.” Seokjin compromised, leaving you with no option but to nod your head in agreeance.

Truthfully, you understood where Seokjin was coming from, and that he wanted you safe. However, you felt like you were being babied despite the small gap in age between the two of you, causing you to follow closely behind him with your head held down like the child you’d been made to feel like. Seokjin ushered himself off to the side, planting his hand at the small of your waist and guiding you along with him.

Seokjin was right about Yukhei. He was yelling, and you could hear him from a couple rooms over, meaning that the temptation of alcohol had won. Inside, you felt a bit betrayed, but you were happy that he was at least having fun.

“Hey,” You tapped his shoulder as he turned to look at you, mouth opening wide with a smile when he saw your face. He wrapped his arms around you and squeezed you tightly as you made a noise of surprise which caused him to let you go.

“I’m gonna go home, Yukhei.” You told him, watching as his face went from confused to shocked and wide eyed. “Y/N, I’m so sorry! ‘M not sober enough to take you home, sweetheart… Forgot my one fuckin’ job of the night, how funny is that.” Yukhei said but it was very obvious he didn’t find it funny, and that he was currently beating himself up for forgetting something so important.

You lifted a hand up to feather it through his hair in a gesture of comfort. “Don’t worry, you’re fine. Seokjin said he’d take me so you’re alright.” You spoke. You saw him sigh in relief but his mood hadn’t seemed to better too much.

“At least you’re gettin’ home safe. So sorry, Y/N, I’ll make it up to ya. I’ll take you out for some food or something. Have a good night.” He told you genuinely, pulling you into another hug, smoothing his hand along your back. You agreed, jokingly stating that he owed you before returning to Seokjin’s side as he led you out of the house party.

“He seems like a nice kid.” Seokjin spoke as he lead you through the crowds of people. You became increasingly aware of the looks you were getting- hungry and astonishing looks, the occasional jealous glare from multiple patrons. You could hear people whispering, asking each other who you are and what business you had with Kim Seokjin.

“Huh?” You spoke when you realized you’d been silent for too long. “Oh, yeah. He really is.” You said. Seokjin offered a smile at your spacey attitude, opening the front door and letting you out before turning around, letting his eyes linger on a couple of people who said especially rude things about you.

“My car’s over here.” Seokjin spoke when he closed the door behind him, making sure you were close by him as he started walking. You stayed silent, more so focusing on the chilly night air hitting your exposed skin. You shivered a bit, but it did not go unnoticed by Jin.

“Shit, sorry.” He said, shrugging off his jacket and beginning to put it around your shoulders. “I didn’t even think about how cold it got.” He said when it was sufficiently wrapped around you. It was large on him, so it almost engulfed you. “It’s okay, it’s yours anyway. I’m sure you’re cold now, too.” You offered, gripping the jacket even though you wanted to keep it for the warmth it offered- not to mention the smell of his cologne that was still on it.

He shook his head. “You’re the one in a dress, you can keep it. Chivalry isn’t dead, you know.” Seokjin offered, making you giggle and playfully roll your eyes. “Oh, sure. True chivalry is being your math tutor.” You said as Seokjin gasped in offense.

“And here I was, thinking you were a nice girl. Should’ve known better…” Seokjin shook his head as the two of you got into the car. He sat there for a moment, hand on the gear before he turned to look at you. “Mind giving me some directions?” He asked charmingly, making you instantly flustered- duh! He didn’t know where you lived.

“Oh, sure. At the end of this street take a right.” You spoke, him nodding easily and shifting the car into drive. You watched the house disappear into the rear view mirror.

-

“Thanks for taking me. You didn’t have to.” You said as Seokjin rolled up your driveway, a couple of lights on signalling some of your family members were still awake. The boy shook his head, turning to look at you. “I was the one who made you leave in the first place, I’d be a dick to not offer a ride home- I get if you’re mad at me for that, by the way.” He said sheepishly, but you gave him a smile and shook your head.

“I mean, it didn’t go the way I always envisioned my first real party- but it wasn’t horrible. Here, let me give you your jacket back-,” You suddenly remembered, sitting up in the front seat and beginning to shrug it off yourself only for Jin to set a hand on your shoulder.

“Keep it. You look good in it. Plus, we still need to get together for some tutoring, so it’s not like I’ll never see it again.” He said, and you nodded dumbly, more focused on the compliment he gave you rather than anything else. Gulping, you sent him a shy smile before popping the car door open.

“Sure. Thank you, Seokjin, see you later.” You said shyly, and he waved goodbye. “Bye, Y/N, I’ll text you. Sleep well.”

[vexing-imogen]

you know how i feel

it’s a new dawn it’s a new day it’s a new life for me and i’m feeling good

(set in the same universe as Nein for a Night, but two years earlier)

If you were to ask Vex where she thought she’d be spending New Dawn’s Eve, Allura Vysoren’s Cloudtop penthouse wouldn’t have made her top five guesses. It wouldn’t have made her top twenty guesses, to be perfectly honest. Sure, Allura was lovely and kind and always made a point to talk to Vex and her friends whenever they met, but she was also a wealthy grad student who was friends with the literal heir to the throne. And the SHITs (as their group chat was so lovingly named)? Well, they were eight undergrads crammed into a crumbling townhouse in the Outer Slums.

But, while the invitation had been completely unexpected, they were never ones to turn down free booze (or food...or anything, for that matter...). So, here they were, thirty minutes to midnight, rubbing shoulders with Emon University elite. Pike had bribed Grog into wearing pants and shoes, though he’d dug his heels in at the mention of a tie, and even Vex had dipped into her precious savings to buy a new dress for the occasion.

The dress is perfect, all black silk and blue lace, just long enough to avoid being indecent, but still sexy enough to make Percy fumble his phone when she’d come down the stairs. That had been a rather pleasant ego boost, with the added bonus of giving her hope that Percy’s feelings for her perhaps mirrored her own for him.

She can see him now, across the room standing at the bar (and seriously, Allura has a fucking bar in her apartment? What the fuck?), making small talk with Uriel Tal’dorei himself. Tiberius would be shitting himself with jealousy, if he weren’t too busy flirting with Allura, utterly oblivious to the halfling, who is most definitely Allura’s girlfriend, glaring daggers at him. Only, Vex can tell that Percy’s bored and looking for an out. And what kind of friend would she be if she didn’t help him?

Vex approaches the bar under the guise of refilling her champagne, and the snippet of conversation she manages to catch is enough to have her eyes glazing over. And she’s majoring in Finance. Percy, while good with money, really could not care less about business or accounting, or, specifically, the inner workings of inter-continental trade agreements.

She waits for Uriel to end his current spiel, and for Percy to respond before she interrupts. “I am so sorry, your Grace,” she says, addressing the Sovereign-to-be, “I know it’s terribly rude of me, but would you mind if I steal Percival away from you? There’s a rather pressing conversation I’ve been meaning to have with him.”

Uriel, for his part, smiles graciously. “Not at all, Miss Vex’ahlia. Steal away,” he says. “I apologize for taking up so much of your time, Percival. I know I have a tendency to monopolize conversation. The perils of being a politician, I suppose.”

“It was a pleasure, really,” Percy lies, shaking Uriel’s hand. “Have a happy New Dawn, your Grace.”

Vex links their arms and steers them towards the balcony, which is deserted because it’s Duscar and therefore really fucking cold. She barely has time to shiver in the winter air before Percy is draping his heavy, blue coat over her shoulders.

“Thanks,” she says, getting her arms into the sleeves and snuggling in. She probably looks ridiculous, bundled in his oversized coat like a child. If only she could be bothered to care.

Percy smirks, sips his own drink. “You saved my life just now. I thought it only polite to return the favor.”

She laughs. “It was either rescue you, or watch you turn your napkin into a swan, and we all made a deal to not embarrass ourselves for Allura’s sake.”

He laughs too, but then falls silent for a few minutes. When he does speak again, he sounds nervous, and she can’t decide if it’s a good omen or bad. “Vex,” he starts, “do you...actually have something that you want to discuss with me, or was that just made up to get me away from Uriel?” He doesn’t wait for her response. “Because, even if it was just made up, I think that we really do need to talk. About...certain things.”

About my birthday, she thinks. About the wild party all those months ago, where she and Percy got shitfaced and made out in his workshop. Where she woke up in his bed, fully clothed and stupidly hungover, and panicked and ran. Where she pretended not to remember any of that night, including the bit where he told her that he was in love with her and then kissed her senseless before she dragged him off somewhere private.

“No, you’re right,” she says, downing half of her champagne in one go. “We do need to talk.” She takes a deep breath and looks him in the eye. Because, as much as she wants to, she can’t be a coward now. “I’m sorry, Percy.”

He nods. “For what?” he prompts.

“For lying to you,” she says, gnawing on her lip. “The morning after me and Vax’s birthday, I told you that I didn’t remember anything that had happened the night before. But, I lied. I remembered...I remember everything.”

He nods again, smiles sadly. “I thought that you must,” he admits. “You were so distant after that night. I could only conclude that I’d...said too much. Freaked you out. Scared you off. Made you hate me.”

She takes his free hand in hers, squeezes. “I could never hate you, darling,” she promises. “Quite the opposite, really.”

His eyebrows shoot up. “Vex...”

“You did scare me,” she confesses. “I mean, gods Percy, you’d never made any indication before then that you had so much as a crush, and then you were telling me that you were in love with me, and you kissed me. And I certainly didn’t stop you, I didn’t want to stop you, but I’d never really considered...and then I woke up, and I wasn’t drunk anymore, and it was real, but it was all too much, and I panicked.”

Percy cups her cheek with the hand that she doesn’t currently have in a death grip, wipes away tears she didn’t even realize were falling. “I’m sorry for putting you through all of that,” he says. “I never meant to spring that on you the way that I did. I was drunk, and I wasn’t thinking rationally, and we’d been flirting all night, so I just thought fuck it and put it all out there, without any regard as to how you might feel about it.” He squeezes her hand. “I was never angry with you for lying, for distancing yourself. It was perfectly rational, once I had time to think clearly about it.”

She smiles sadly. “I only distanced myself so that I could sort out my feelings properly. And then once I did...” She chuckles ruefully. “Well, let’s just say I probably owe my brother and Pike a lifetime’s worth of drinks for dealing with that whole mess.”

Percy laughs. “That certainly explains some things.”

“What things, Percy?”

He shakes his head. “Nothing of consequence, dear. Harmless pranks, I can tell you later.”

Vex shrugs. “I don’t really care, in all honesty,” she says. “Just tell me one thing, Percy.”

“What’s that, Vex’ahlia?”

She swallows her nerves. “Are you still in love with me?”

He smiles. “Yes.” He brings her hand to his lips, kisses it. “Tell me one thing in return, Vex?” She nods. “Have you sorted out your feelings for me?”

“Yes.” She licks her lips. “Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo the Third, I am hopelessly in love with you.”

The grin that splits his face is the brightest she’s ever seen from him. “Well then.” He ducks his head as she surges up to meet him, and then they’re kissing. And it could be minutes or it could be years, but she thinks she’s never experienced a more pleasurable way to lose track of time.

The spell is broken by the sound of the party counting down to midnight. “We’re going to miss the fireworks,” Percy mumbles against her lips.

Vex grins. “I couldn’t give a fuck about fireworks right now, Percy. You?”

He presses his forehead to hers, cups her face in his hands. “With you right in front of me, how could I?”

[punkscowardschampions]

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: Afternoon Janis: Just about Janis: Won't tell anyone you didn't hit me up with the coveted Morning text, like Jimmy: No need when I'm there to do it in person Jimmy: Just use your imagination when you tell 'em how I woke you up Janis: 😏 Why bother when they so ready to do it themselves, like Janis: #yourinfluence obvs Jimmy: 😎 Jimmy: Yours is that the 🐶 won't shut up 'bout you #real love 💕 Janis: Dog, yeah? Janis: Not heard that one before Jimmy: Alright, you rumbled me, my sister too Jimmy: But what the dog's saying is nicer Janis: 😂 Janis: I did forget to invite her along, to be fair Janis: Forgetfulness gotta be catching 'cos Mia totally wanted to idk Janis: wax my bikini line or something, apparently Jimmy: I know this is fake but your dirty talk needs some work, mate Jimmy: Good to know that shit does happen at sleepovers though Janis: Grow up dickhead 🙄 Janis: probably try recreate game of thrones and pour it on my head, no thanks Janis: can't make that sexy, no matter how many dragons I add to the story, soz Jimmy: Niche reference 👍 Jimmy: I rolled up to say tah for not being a dickhead anyway Jimmy: It all went to plan Janis: You're definitely that kinda nerd, don't lie Janis: Duh Janis: 🥇 Janis: I told you Jimmy: Piss off am I Jimmy: You can't pretend that you don't know how cool I am now, Joan Janis: What, 'cos you took me to the pub I suggested Janis: Okay 😏 Jimmy: 'cause I didn't make a holy show of myself as you Irish call it Jimmy: at the pub you suggested Janis: You were alright Janis: Not too unbearable, like Jimmy: I love you too, baby 😘 Janis: 🖕 Idiot Jimmy: What you doing tonight? Jimmy: We should be seen together so people don't reckon I got what I wanted and that's it Janis: Or you were that shit I've had to ghost you Jimmy: Nobody's thinking that Janis: Alright ego 😜 Janis: but I'm up for doing something, long as it's not totally shit Jimmy: Is there like a party or something going on? Jimmy: More people the better, I reckon Janis: Undoubtedly Janis: I'll ask my cousin, not everyone he knows is a total prick Janis: up for the challenge, yeah? 💪 Jimmy: Like you said 🥇 Janis: 👍 I've hit him up, let you know the where and when Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: I'm on a half day so don't matter Jimmy: Time to make myself look #goals Janis: Sick Janis: weren't too dead were ya? Jimmy: Nah Jimmy: You? Janis: Good Janis: 'Course not Janis: Lazy rich bitch anyway so you know Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: tah for saying it so I don't 'ave to Janis: Please, you're so gutted Jimmy: Maybe Jimmy: You'll just have to cheer me up tonight Janis: Yeah? Janis: Easy Jimmy: Easy for you to say now, yeah Jimmy: We haven't faked it for that long before Janis: Have a little faith Janis: 'less you're planning to make it hard for me or Jimmy: It'd be more fun but we've got a deal Jimmy: So don't fuck it up & I won't Janis: Fine 🙄 Jimmy: Saving your enthusiasm? 👍 Janis: Yeah Janis: basically got 16 years worth saved up, hope you're ready Jimmy: Challenge accepted, Jillian Janis: That's the worse one yet Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: I won't use it when anyone can hear me, don't worry Jimmy: What's your name again though? Janis: You testing me Janis: watch me turn up looking like a bag of shit now Janis: enjoy, wanker Jimmy: Watch me 😍😍😍 even harder for it Jimmy: You're not gonna beat me, babe Janis: So am Jimmy: Like I said, easy to say now Jimmy: Harder to do when I'm chaining 🚬 to put you off Janis: 😒 I've handled worse Jimmy: I don't need your exes list, Judy Janis: Short list Janis: . Janis: like Jimmy: What? Jimmy: You only fake date Jimmy: 🎻 Janis: Fuck off Janis: I don't date Janis: waste of time Jimmy: Can be Janis: Is Jimmy: Pete'll be gutted Jimmy: Still, if you're as good in bed for real as you are when it's fake, decent consolation Janis: I'm sure Janis: aside from he probably fancies you more than he does me Jimmy: Me too, he's been name dropping you all shift 💕 Jimmy: Wrong again, Jennifer Janis: Lies Jimmy: I didn't know who he meant for half of it Jimmy: but yeah Janis: Brilliant Janis: Good thing he's not our target demo then isn't it Jimmy: No offense, Janis Jimmy: ain't my fault he don't know you Janis: Why would he Janis: He's like year above ain't he, idk Jimmy: How would I know? Jimmy: Not the one crushing on him Janis: You do keep bringing him up Janis: if you needed a beard, like Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: What do you wanna talk about then? Janis: [Party deets] Janis: There you go, can plan your outfit now Jimmy: What time do you wanna show up? Janis: Later the better, init Janis: make a scene but also, don't have to spend too much time surrounded by idiots Jimmy: You just know you can't hack faking being my girlfriend for too long Jimmy: but 👌 Janis: Bitch I can go all night Jimmy: Nah Jimmy: You'd be stretched to do an hour Janis: Bollocks Janis: When do YOU wanna go then? Jimmy: I'd go right now if they'd have me Jimmy: Better than being stuck at the CG Janis: N'awh, you really know how to make a girl feel special, babe 😘 Jimmy: 🎻 Jimmy: I'll do it tonight Jimmy: Do your best to wait patiently, Jodie Janis: 🖕 Do yours to keep up Janis: can't be too late if you gotta leave 9 though, are you sure Janis: lowkey might not even start before then Jimmy: I've sorted it with Cass Jimmy: I can be out as late as we need to get this done Janis: Didn't know it was her calling the curfew not your Da Janis: but makes sense, tbh Janis: cool then Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: He don't call any shots Jimmy: But someone's gotta look after my brother & he don't worry 'bout that either Janis: I wasn't trying to be funny about it Jimmy: Decent effort then 'cause you weren't Janis: Alright Janis: sorry Jimmy: 👍 Janis: meet there? Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: Let me know when Janis: k Jimmy: [Later] Jimmy: They want me to work over Jimmy: when are we going? Janis: Oh, don't worry then if it's gonna be too much hassle Jimmy: It's only a couple more hours Janis: When are you getting off now? Jimmy: 4.30 Jimmy: but I got some shit to do when I leave here Jimmy: part of Cass' bargain Janis: 👍 good girl Janis: anything i can help with or you alright Jimmy: you can get the dog out Jimmy: know you'd both love that 💕 Janis: Sure thing Janis: use the extra steps myself anyway Jimmy: Come and get my keys whenever Janis: Are the kids gonna be about Janis: they could come with, if they would Jimmy: you can ask 'em if you're feeling brave Janis: Just an idea Janis: might run off some energy lowkey exhaust the dog and them, like Jimmy: I reckon it's a good one Jimmy: They might not Janis: I'll try Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: If they're dickheads, text me Janis: Don't worry, I've got millions of cousins and shit, I know how to not get 'em killed or I wouldn't offer Jimmy: Weren't worried 'bout 'em Jimmy: Just you Janis: Oi Janis: I'm no soft-touch Jimmy: Only got your word for that, mate Janis: 😑 Janis: Proof'll be how well-trained this dog is Jimmy: You ain't got long enough for that Jimmy: I'm not fake dating you for years tah Janis: Christ no Janis: crash course, I'm that good Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: as long as you're more convincing tonight Janis: Name a time I haven't been Janis: everyone's buying it so hard Jimmy: I told you, that was lowest tier shit Jimmy: You have to pretend to like me for longer than a make out sesh Janis: I keep telling you I can, damn Janis: Can't prove it 'til we're there, can I? Jimmy: Alright, calm down Jimmy: take some pics on your walk, really milk how domestic we are Janis: Done Janis: she's very photogenic Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: you can date her for real when this is over Janis: You're giving me her in the fake breakup, yeah? Janis: Cheers Jimmy: why not? Jimmy: means you gotta give me something Jimmy: get thinking Janis: can I interest you in Grace? Janis: know what you're thinking, literally defeats the point Janis: but she just looking for a new fam Janis: bitch for a bitch Jimmy: nah tah Jimmy: One sister's enough Janis: Shit Janis: I got 3 Janis: worst luck Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: violin solo for each Janis: Grace is more like a fucking triangle solo Jimmy: brutal Jimmy: I don't reckon there's an emoji for that though 💔 Janis: 🃏 Janis: really lacking on the emoji front Janis: gutted, gonna complain Jimmy: get it done, Joanne Janis: talk to twitter whilst i'm there Janis: your account not dead now? Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: I ain't checked Janis: Bummer Janis: no new nudes for me 💔 Jimmy: I'll streak through the party Jimmy: make an entrance Janis: 😂 Janis: Twat Janis: There's no pretending to be 😍 over public indecency Jimmy: try harder then, dickhead Jimmy: thought you were 🥇 Janis: I don't want everyone to reckon I'm actually derranged, like Janis: be normal, Taylor Jimmy: spoilsport Janis: you know, one of us has to Jimmy: I get it, you don't reckon you won't be overcome with lust at the sight of me actually naked Jimmy: head in the game, girl Janis: 'Course Janis: who wouldn't be Janis: turning it into a casual orgy Jimmy: Mia maybe Jimmy: You're more her type Janis: Ugh don't Janis: idk what her problem really is Janis: 'cept she wants to wear my skin Jimmy: she's jealous Janis: Nah Janis: she's an only child and her daddy gives her everything so she's rolling in it Jimmy: but 'til he gives her money for surgery you're prettier than her Jimmy: & now you've got me so 🗡 Janis: Don't fuck her, yeah? Janis: It must be how she gets her power 'cos she's got no interest in actually being with you, she just has a list of like every boy in Dublin or some shit she's working through Jimmy: even if she has surgery, I have standards, I told you Janis: Good Janis: even if you're a bit of a prick, hate to see you go like that Janis: 🐍 eat you when she's done Jimmy: I'd rather my 🍆 stays attached to me Jimmy: more use than my head Janis: What's more #bae Janis: agree or disagree? 🤔 Jimmy: take it to a twitter poll Janis: I think they've got a bias rn though, after that pic Janis: say something dead brainy, babe Jimmy: too northern for that Jimmy: do it for me & say I did Janis: It's weird when you're #humble Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: gonna fuck with you when you find out that's the real me Janis: Coulda kept that in the vault, I'd never know Jimmy: Like I said, you'd find out Janis: You not planning on deleting me when this is all over then? Jimmy: Probably but there's still this thing called IRL Jimmy: Can't bin school off yet Janis: Oh, where I'm at my most social, 'course Janis: you barely knew I existed 'til now I think we'll be fine 😏 Jimmy: Don't be gutted Jimmy: I know your name now & everything Janis: Yeah was so sat there praying for the day Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: 💕 Janis: what are you actually gonna wear Janis: not saying we should be THAT fake couple and co-ord but Jimmy: hadn't given it any real thought Jimmy: what's the party dress code in leprechaun land? Janis: depends who you are and who they are Janis: don't wanna be try hard Janis: probably can't show up in my gym clothes, though Jimmy: who am I & who are they, babe? Janis: you know who you are Janis: leather jackets ain't just for your baes, obviously Janis: idk who this kid is exactly but he lives in a normal neighbourhood so he's not like dead posh or anything Jimmy: there's your answer then Jimmy: easy 😍 Jimmy: only challenge is me finding the place Janis: I better hang about then after I've walked the dog Janis: probably more #goals to go together anyway Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: smoothie? Jimmy: You should eat so you don't get dead drunk again Janis: 'Scuse me Janis: I was not Jimmy: You were Jimmy: & don't bring a jacket so you can wear mine that's gotta be #goals Janis: Just mad it went unnoticed that I was in the dog walking 'gram Janis: too 💕 for them all, baby Jimmy: just don't get as pissed tonight Jimmy: you might let everyone know how you really feel Janis: You ain't my Dad Jimmy: Nah, I'm your fake boyfriend & I'd like it if you didn't out us Jimmy: that's it Janis: I'm not going to because I wasn't even drunk and I won't be tonight Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: if you're gonna chat shit, I've got work to do Janis: I don't wanna chat to you anyway if you're gonna be shady Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: Shady? Am I also slim 😂 Jimmy: top lingo, Janet Janis: 😒 you are that white Jimmy: take it up with my dad Janis: When can we have our first fake fight 'cos you're asking for it today, like Jimmy: a bit soon unless you wanna do a really hot makeup makeout Janis: Who'd want that? Janis: Shame Jimmy: the fans Janis: True Janis: but you said I've gotta show I can stand you when you ain't rocking my world so Jimmy: & you've gotta show you want me too more than just a once off Janis: Don't want much, do ya? Jimmy: It ain't about what I want Janis: You know what I mean Jimmy: I know you keep saying you'll do this easy Jimmy: So stop whinging Janis: I ain't Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you liked whelan's then, yeah Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: I'll probably go back Janis: good Janis: i knew you would, it's alright Jimmy: seeing as you know me so well you can find me a real girl to date when this is over Janis: ha Janis: jog on Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: go on Jimmy: it'd be a laugh to see who you'd pick if nowt else Janis: not a dyke, remember? Jimmy: didn't say you had to join in with us, did I? Janis: shut up Janis: what do i know about girls Janis: not a real one, am i Jimmy: what do you reckon you are then? My dream Jimmy: Piss off Janis: don't be stupid Jimmy: you're real Janis: You said it, not me Jimmy: What? Janis: 'you can find me a real girl to date' Jimmy: I meant a girl to not fake date Janis: whatever Jimmy: come on, Janis Janis: don't matter Janis: forget it Jimmy: don't wanna Janis: don't be a dick Janis: if you didn't mean it you didn't Jimmy: I'm not Jimmy: So don't you be a dickhead Janis: What the fuck have I done? Jimmy: acting shady Jimmy: to use your top lingo Janis: 😑 you clearly don't know what that means Jimmy: nah I don't Jimmy: it's bollocks Jimmy: reckon you made it up just then Janis: not that deep undercover than we need our own language Jimmy: good 'cause I ain't sure I'd keep up Jimmy: proper cryptic you Irish Janis: 🖕 Janis: how's that for cryptic? Janis: gobshite Jimmy: 😂 Janis: I'm not finding you a girlfriend Janis: Ruin your own life Jimmy: Alright, leave me to my own devices so I can find another girl who prefers old blokes Jimmy: on your head Janis: If it keeps you from becoming a baby daddy, aren't I doing you/the world a massive service, really, like Jimmy: if that keeps you warm, mate, tell yourself it Jimmy: I'll be shivering 'cause left out in the cold 🎻 Janis: Catch me and Pete laughing at you whilst we fuck on a huge pile of money in our mcmansion Janis: #thedream Jimmy: leave it out Jimmy: I've seen him concentrating when he makes a latte I don't need to think about his face when he's going at it Janis: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: get in his inbox to live that dream Janis: Can't be having my fake mans and real in the same place Janis: mixing business and pleasure always a no Jimmy: he won't say owt Jimmy: tell him you're down to cheat Janis: thanks for your permission 😂 Jimmy: don't care, do I? Jimmy: just keep it off the 'gram Janis: You might have endless faith in him but I don't Janis: everyone knows everyone's business around here 🙄 Jimmy: if you cheat I ain't lost owt Jimmy: go on Jimmy: save me a break up Janis: I don't think so Janis: I get to come out of this looking good, that was part of the deal Jimmy: We can change it easy Jimmy: & anyway who says pete ain't a trade up Janis: Nah Janis: Deal's a deal, I'm sticking to my side of it Jimmy: You've done it Jimmy: been proven those girls ain't my type Janis: If that was true we wouldn't be going tonight Janis: we ain't done here Jimmy: we ain't done for you Jimmy: but if you reckon you've got a better offer, take it Janis: Don't use this as an excuse Janis: you know I don't Jimmy: an excuse for what? Janis: For not wanting to help me out now we've sorted your side of it out Jimmy: I've said I'll do it Jimmy: like I said, not about what I want Janis: I know you don't want it alright Janis: it doesn't have to be much longer Jimmy: just don't fuck Pete Jimmy: I still have to work with him Jimmy: & I don't want the pisstake Janis: I'm not going to Janis: I've literally not spoken to him before Jimmy: then don't speak to him Janis: Um bit far, am I only allowed to order smoothies from you? Jimmy: CG isn't the only shit coffee shop around Jimmy: why come in after this? Janis: so I'm banned now, jesus Janis: fine Janis: I don't even drink coffee Jimmy: I can't ban you Jimmy: not the manager Janis: but you would if you could? Janis: well that's lovely Jimmy: so you would come in for coffee & a chat after I've fake dumped you? 👌 Janis: You're actually such a prick Janis: 1. I'M dumping YOU Janis: 2. You were actually serious that you're gonna delete me? Avoid me forever too? Very mature Jimmy: I'm gonna delete everyone Jimmy: not just you Jimmy: why do you care? like you said, didn't know each other existed before Janis: You're gonna have no friends, whole time you're here then Jimmy: hopefully Jimmy: what you're offering now, are you? Janis: no one good enough for you, yeah? Janis: not now I know Janis: don't worry Jimmy: you were the one warning me not to turn into 'em like a day ago Jimmy: didn't realise the real you was a cheerleader of leprechaun town Janis: Piss off Jimmy: that's the plan Jimmy: wear the uniform tonight though, the fans will love it Janis: It's going to take you ages you may as well try and tolerate it whilst you're here Jimmy: You don't have to outdo my dad on the fatherly advice Jimmy: not part of the deal Janis: Exactly, you're not gonna leave your brother and sister here Janis: so it's years, not months Jimmy: that's assuming any of us are gonna stay here Jimmy: he keeps jobs slightly longer than girlfriends but don't go mad, like Janis: Yeah great, hinge your masterplan on his lack of Janis: I hope it all works out for you, really Jimmy: I don't need a masterplan this is my real life not a fake dating plot Janis: Fuck you Janis: Act like it then, you live here right now, get over it Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: You've lived here longer Jimmy: where's your friends? Janis: What's it matter 'bout me? Jimmy: you're dishing it out like I gotta be living my best life Jimmy: sort yours Janis: Again, this isn't about me Janis: you're not me Jimmy: & you ain't me, sweetheart Jimmy: you don't know what I want so don't tell me Janis: Don't fucking talk to me like that Jimmy: likewise Janis: Fine, be miserable Janis: like you said, why do I care Jimmy: 👍 Janis: Fuck me knowing what you want, I hope you work it out Jimmy: I have Janis: Good for you Jimmy: dead patronising you Jimmy: Love that Janis: I'm not the one throwing out sweethearts like it's the 70s Jimmy: Nah, you're just the one judging me when all you know is my name basically Jimmy: starting to see your sister's POV now Jimmy: bit of a nightmare, aren't you? Janis: Go fuck her then Jimmy: I don't want to Jimmy: but tah for the permission Janis: Literally drop dead Janis: I never once judged you and it's fucking rich you taking issue when all you do is judge everyone here all the time Jimmy: just 'cause you're a girl don't mean you can talk me like that & then tell me how to talk to you Janis: like what Janis: you talk to me like a piece of shit Jimmy: 🖕 Janis: Great Janis: Bye Jimmy: not bye, see you in a bit Jimmy: unless you're bailing Janis: you reckon i'm in the party mood Janis: really Jimmy: not what I asked Jimmy: don't matter how you really feel, does it? Janis: you're a sociopath, awesome Jimmy: no idea Jimmy: but alright fuck the party, don't bother me Janis: nah, 'course, nothing does Jimmy: nowt that's any of your business Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I'll still walk the dog it isn't her fault Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: you'll still need the keys Jimmy: won't throw 'em at you not very #goals Janis: I don't care anymore Janis: who am I impressing, like you said Jimmy: when? Janis: You know Janis: I've got no friends, I'm a nightmare Janis: 🎻 Janis: the list goes on Jimmy: that's not what they're seeing Jimmy: just me 🎻 Jimmy: you've impressed everyone else Janis: Please Janis: you're so smart now Jimmy: It don't take much Janis: Exactly Janis: Jig is probably up Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: you know it's working Janis: Yeah not now I hate you Jimmy: you didn't love me before Jimmy: but alright Jimmy: call it off Janis: I'm not coming out of this like this Janis: you don't have to see me Janis: I'll make it work myself Jimmy: 👌 Janis: just tell me how you wanna sound Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: do it how you want Janis: is it wise to give me such free reign Janis: nightmare i am Jimmy: you heard me Jimmy: don't matter Janis: You reckon I shouldn't care? Jimmy: I'm saying I don't Janis: No one's judging you anyway Jimmy: feel free to change that Janis: I'm not that much of a bitch Janis: thanks Jimmy: not on the 'gram anyway Janis: Fuck you Janis: I was being nice Jimmy: 'til I told you not to fuck Pete Jimmy: If I knew that was the dealbreaker I wouldn't have said nowt Janis: No, 'til you asked me to find you a girlfriend, called me not a girl Janis: then fucking agreed with my sister Jimmy: I told you, I never said you weren't a girl Jimmy: & I weren't serious about the girlfriend thing Janis: Whatever Janis: I don't even know if that's his name so it isn't about that Jimmy: alright Janis: It ain't alright Janis: I wasn't serious either you didn't have to take it like that and make it into this thing Jimmy: I seriously don't want you to fuck my co-workers Jimmy: that's all I said Janis: I'm not going to! Janis: I don't even want to Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: don't matter now Janis: Why not Jimmy: 'cause this is finished Jimmy: we don't need to keep chatting 'bout it Janis: Why is it a problem if I'm not gonna do it Jimmy: it ain't Janis: Then stop being a dick Jimmy: You stop being a dick Janis: dickhead Jimmy: You're the dickhead Janis: Oh my God Janis: stop Jimmy: just break it off Jimmy: I've got work to do Janis: Come on Janis: you're really dedicated now you don't wanna talk to me Jimmy: why would I? Jimmy: if we aren't going to the party what is there to chat about? Janis: well we could Janis: but fine Jimmy: you don't wanna either Jimmy: you hate me now, remember? Janis: Well you never liked me apparently so can't be offended Jimmy: yeah I can Janis: It's not fair, that's bullshit Jimmy: you hating me is not the same as me not knowing you Janis: maybe i'm being slightly dramatic Jimmy: go for it Jimmy: like I said, don't matter Janis: No Janis: Shut up being annoying Janis: let's go to the party Jimmy: I don't reckon that's a good idea Janis: Why not Jimmy: not in the running for an oscar, are we? Janis: alright Janis: i'll go by myself i guess Jimmy: that's a worse idea Jimmy: get it together, Jasmine Janis: Why? Jimmy: You're a pisshead & you need me Janis: 😑 Janis: well then you have to come Janis: I'm going Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: when? Janis: Whenever you've done what you've gotta do at Home Janis: I'm already on the bus to get the keys Jimmy: I just have to get the bribes in Jimmy: come with Jimmy: we can get drinks for the party or whatever Janis: I get it, all the sugar Janis: alright Janis: just don't try to palm me off with alcopops Jimmy: piss off would I Jimmy: I don't hate you Janis: tah 😏 you do reckon I can't handle my drink though Janis: which is just untrue Jimmy: you couldn't Jimmy: that's all I've got to go off Jimmy: prove me wrong tonight if you're that mad 'bout it Janis: What did I do? Janis: because I have evidence of YOU licking MY face, thanks snapchat Jimmy: FOR snapchat Jimmy: you were being nice to me when the camera weren't on Janis: How dare I 🙄 Janis: make it sound like I was tryna jump you Jimmy: nowt like that Jimmy: you were just Jimmy: fuck knows, mate Janis: ominous Janis: maybe i won't drink Janis: fuck's sake Jimmy: challenge turned down? 👌 Janis: 😠 No Janis: you got me paranoid now though Jimmy: not trying to get in your head so I'll win or owt Jimmy: nah Janis: 😒 Jimmy: for real though that weren't how I wanted that to sound Jimmy: it was fun Jimmy: you weren't a total dickhead like usual, that's it Janis: so what you're really saying is Janis: I should make a habit of it? Janis: cool Janis: I thought you meant I was white girl wasted then I'd have to kms, obviously Jimmy: I'm saying if I were gonna hate you, I couldn't then 'cause you were alright Jimmy: calm down Janis: Awh babe Jimmy: what the fuck is white girl wasted? Janis: If Gracie or any of her mates are at this party, hopefully not, you'll get to see Janis: the girls who are screaming 'this is my song!' to every other shit song Janis: and lose their shoes and shit and end up sobbing hysterically on a poor bouncer or something Jimmy: that don't exist up north, lasses drink like lads Jimmy: I'll have to take you Jimmy: learn something, Jemima Janis: you can't say the north has a better drinking  culture than ireland Janis: that's literally all we're known for excuse you Jimmy: I reckon I just did Jimmy: am I gonna get cursed now? Janis: Think you're gonna get deported so you'll be buzzin' on that Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: they aren't gonna be at the party are they? Janis: Nah, would've seen all the annoying getting ready and pre-drinks stories by now Jimmy: thank feck as you 🍀 say Jimmy: fun as it'd be to get that angry vein going in Mia's head again Janis: Please never say that again but do 'cos I wanna hear wtf it'd sound like in your accent 😂 Janis: she's DYING for round two Jimmy: I'll whisper it in your ear later if you pretend I'm saying something #goals Janis: Deal Jimmy: Just don't piss yourself laughing I don't need everyone reckoning my chat is that bad Janis: 🎭 Janis: I'll be so into it it'll be awkward for everyone else Janis: 💪 Jimmy: yeah alright Jane fonda just try & look like you're dying for round two 😍💕 Jimmy: maybe there'll be a room we can fake fuck in Janis: What are house parties for Janis: besides easier underage drinking, obviously Jimmy: as long as Mia ain't there to listen at the door Janis: I refuse to fake an orgasm for her the cunt you'd have to actually just fuck me Jimmy: I'll just take you home if she shows up Jimmy: pretend like I'm anti-fucking in strangers houses Jimmy: like its a northern thing or summat Janis: 😂 Polite, very anti-you Janis: but it works Jimmy: there's only so much convincing fakery I could let you do before it'd just sound hot Jimmy: not part of the deal for me to be into it Janis: Yeah Janis: Only human Jimmy: 🐍 quota in these parts is full Janis: Truly Janis: Don't tell Paddy, he'll be fuming Jimmy: 🤞 Jimmy: better get more smokes if you're sharing Jimmy: remind me Janis: Should get my own, least pay you half Jimmy: call it my being a dickhead tax Jimmy: besides, people were into it Jimmy: new #goals Janis: You make it look good Janis: no one needs to know you get out of breath on a dog walk Jimmy: you give then you take away Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: next time tweet the first bit & leave off the second Janis: I already did that story, no caption necessary Janis: can't have you thinking I'm too nice again and going weird on me Jimmy: Piss off Jimmy: Are we meant to do getting ready snaps or are you not white enough? Janis: God no Janis: 'less we're being all extra about how much we don't wanna leave bed, like Jimmy: we could Jimmy: I zip up your...dress? but you take off my shirt Jimmy: make it sexy Jimmy: 😂 Janis: 😂 Janis: this is just going to get confusing Janis: end up leaving half undressed but not in the intentional way Jimmy: no then? Janis: nah, we can Janis: means having to take less there so we can lowkey have a decent time still Jimmy: almost like you now Jimmy: 'cause that's a top plan Janis: Gimme time Janis: not a fan of almosts like go all in and hate me or you know Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: what are you wearing not heavy breathing way? Jimmy: in a* Janis: Thanks for clarifying Janis: I put a few options in my bag, I'd ask a girl but you know Janis: You'll have to do Jimmy: I am out of breath but 🚬 not burning desire Jimmy: piss off I'm better Jimmy: I'll tell you what looks hot Jimmy: 😍 not bitchy side eye Janis: #truelove Janis: #lastsalifetime #inyourlungs Janis: Good, can always get that from your sister if I'm missing it Jimmy: You're getting too decent at #s gonna have to dump you 💔 Janis: #damn Jimmy: Stop Janis: #gonnamissmewhenimgone Jimmy: #Janis please Jimmy: if you make me laugh I could keel over 🚬 remember Janis: When bae calls you a health risk 😍 Jimmy: #goals right Jimmy: love you so much its gonna kill me Janis: mhmm Janis: i told ya, just got the organ wrong Janis: no 💔 going for the lungs Jimmy: just leave my 🍆 out of it & like my head I ain't too concerned Jimmy: least I got a pair of lungs Janis: are you saying i have 🍆 envy Janis: cos that's even older than the dyke line tbh i expect better from you Jimmy: let me know when I streak through the party Janis: 😂 Janis: Will do Jimmy: don't say nowt if you don't 'cause 💔 Jimmy: it ain't my party to cry at Janis: Poor boy Janis: Just tryna seem nonchalant 'cos already meant to have seen it, duh Jimmy: try & seem 😍 like you can't get enough of it though Jimmy: tah very much Janis: Okay you want drooling Janis: got it Jimmy: if you can Janis: Don't doubt me, just your ability to bring it Janis: kinda cold Jimmy: where I'm from this is summer temps Jimmy: don't worry 'bout me, girl Janis: Then we won't have a problem Jimmy: nah Jimmy: & if anyone asks, I'm thinking 'bout you #muse Janis: I think they'll have more pressing questions Janis: like, what the fuck? Jimmy: that's how it is in 🍀 Jimmy: boring feckers Janis: 😂 Janis: maybe after you've been there and had a few Jimmy: I won't find them boring? Jimmy: or I will Janis: saying you taking your kit off would be craic and not a sign of something wrong Janis: they'll still be pretty dry Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: can I leave here yet? it's rivaling in the boredom stakes Jimmy: come back Mia, some mildly annoying shit you've done is forgiven Jimmy: nowt else Janis: Shh Janis: come meet me off bus Janis: #romance Jimmy: alright Jimmy: you sold it to me Janis: 💕 Soft Jimmy: give me the kiss of life if I look like I'm going Jimmy: 'cause you know I'll 🚬 & walk Janis: 😏 Janis: Giving the OAPs on here a show Jimmy: love our new audience 💕 Janis: always a bitchy one though, i 👀 you grandmia Jimmy: probably is her nan Jimmy: does she have a face like 🍋 Janis: Chewing wasps forreal Janis: though I think Mia just rose up from the pits of hell by herself so Jimmy: get her number for my ex Janis: 😂 Janis: so thoughtful Jimmy: her status updates have been harrowing mate Jimmy: reckon Barry's playing away 💔🎻 Janis: Oh no Janis: typical Barry move Jimmy: Yeah Jimmy: near end of life crisis Janis: Stop making me laugh I'm getting looks Jimmy: payback for before when you near ended my life Jimmy: could be worse least I'm not turning you on with the mention of him Janis: War flashbacks, like Jimmy: you got it, JoJo Janis: 💔 Janis: I don't get it but you do you Janis: true love and all that, I guess Jimmy: You don't get wanting to fuck an old bloke? Jimmy: Me either Janis: 😏 OMG we get it, you're straight Janis: it's me they got the questions about, not you Jimmy: so far Jimmy: but Pete is gonna need consoling for his 💔 Janis: 🙄 don't drag me into this Janis: find yourself a girl and him a mans Jimmy: so nah to the threesome? 👌 I'll let him know Janis: You don't wanna see his cum face Jimmy: I'll look at the back of his head Janis: Alright, glad you've worked out the logistics Janis: be rude to make him stay under the pillow Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: in or out? Janis: whey Janis: long as it don't count 'cos threeways don't Jimmy: 'course Janis: 👍 Jimmy: #romance Janis: you know it Janis: real test faking it to that level, no matter how thick he is Jimmy: 🥇 Jimmy: we've got this baby 💕 Janis: Poor Pete Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: you see me yet? Janis: Hold on, lemme try and remember what you look like Jimmy: You ain't that good at faking it, Justine Jimmy: #unforgettable Janis: You'll be huffy when you find me chatting to the wrong white boy Jimmy: Nah I'll just smack him Jimmy: #goals like Janis: 😏 Janis: There you are Jimmy: 😘

[coffeeandmoonthoughts]

free flow thoughts

We’ve all had those people that we care about, but they are stuck and for whatever reason refuse to be saved or begin to save themselves. We might have even been that person at one point in time. We see someone who shows us a solution like they are drawing back a curtain and yet we refuse to walk through the doorway and we aren’t sure why. Or maybe we are the one holding the curtain open and begging someone to follow but their feet remain glued to the floor. I’ve been both of those people. The truth is, only we can take care of ourselves. We will repeat old patterns until we break them ourselves. No one can walk in and do that for you. Maybe I just hold a very ruthless view towards this now, but my view is built upon actually being there where I didn’t want to be. It makes me want to passionately slap sense into everyone who comes to me bleeding from a self inflicted pain, demons or stuck in a pit of quicksand and wont grab onto the life preserver. But the situation requires grace and patience. What do you do when someone believes that they would be better off if they had someone else to manage them. Lead by example and leave it at that. I’m not withholding some magical “get your shit together” potion. Accountability can help, but that shit has to come from within. You usually create it when you find out exactly where your rock bottom is. I’m working now. I’m building and creating. I’m taking big bites into life and trusting that based on what I know I’ve done, I’ll be able to chew and swallow because I know the days ahead of me might be harder. I need to be able to tackle whatever I have to. My capacity has always been bigger than I thought.

When I share my personal dreams and motives sometimes I’m met with people who inform me it’s vanity and ego that drives someone towards accolades and accomplishment. But you aren’t understanding that its not about accolades. Yeah, its all pointless in the very end, but a pointless life isn’t a life at all. I want to give my life meaning. To create it. To help others. To make a living to do what I want. I practice holding myself together, I drown myself in good thoughts that grow me. I find peace in tracking what I do, it gives me a target to aim at. Feeling accomplished is an intrinsic part of human nature. Regardless if that’s in love or work or health or whatever you want to apply it to. YOU create it. I know what happens already when I let myself rot in the mud. I don’t want to ever go back there again. At one point, I let people and circumstances destroy me. I’ve been a pawn, I’ve fed fragile egos, I’ve also been the user, been the ego. I’ve been both the prey and the hunter. Not anymore. When I relay this sometimes it’s like people are hearing it but not listening. You cant force someone to open up their ears when they aren’t ready. They complain, tell me they want something and then go about half assing it. You have to whole-ass it or you didn’t want it badly enough. I get the impression that if you can find obstacles that stop you (to a reasonable extent), then maybe it wasn’t what you truly wanted at all.

I have to actively avoid certain people. I love them but they will literally drag me down to their mediocre level and beat me with experience, as they say. I actively have to practice tuning them out. I take precaution, learn to differentiate between people like that and the ones that shine when they see others shining. People who tear happy, successful people down, do it because they are mad they didn’t get it themselves. They see their potential reflected and are driven by insecure hate. And I’m truly truly sorry, but I cant fix that. I will burn myself to the ground before I apologize for my fire. They expend my energy. They suck it all out, leave me feeling exhausted, depleted and no one wins. I grow to resent when that happens. It tears me apart. Thoreau once said most men live lives of quiet desperation. Although nothing is guaranteed, you can still sort through what is in your control and avoid living in quiet desperation. I don’t judge people like this. I once was exactly where they are. I cant hate on it and I have no right to. Every day I still wake up pissed, fuming, angry at where I once was, and what I lost or what I did. But I don’t choose to stay there. So many things scared me. I lived in a world of fear where I was the prey. I formed bad coping mechanisms, i was blind, i was scared but I never stopped trying until one day it clicked. I was afraid of my potential, i saw both my dark and light, i was afraid of my potential for love, knowing that once i released it it would be stronger than anything I’ve ever felt. I have to live with that now. Learn from it, adapt, feel for those people where I once was, help where I can, draw boundaries and respect the boundaries of others. I cant have people around me that don’t fit into the puzzle of my life anymore. I can only risk so much. I wont lose myself again like that. “I wish I could go back, I fucked it all up”. No. Even if everything was perfect and your dream life was staring you in the face, you still wouldn’t have been in the right headspace until you failed. Im learning how to take inventory and turn it all around. People have to learn how to be their own hope, their own hero. You write your own story and if you don’t like what you’re writing you can reverse it.

What do you do when you see someone’s perspective is all off, but you cant change it? I cant grab someone’s face and flip it for them. Its frustrating, its exhausting. You are your own hero. Start living your life that way. I don’t have super powers and any average human who you bestow that kind of power on, you are doing them a disservice. The fact is as long as you are trying you are on the right track. So you failed? Okay well now you know where your breaking point is. Now you know exactly where that lays. So now you can apply that knowledge to your future. Abandonment sucks. I’ve dealt with abandonment since I was very young and then repeated it my entire young life. This isn’t a contest of who’s more fucked up, but I’m trying to explain that most people are stronger than what they have gone through. I feel so much compassion now, so much understanding but I am only just a human who can do so much. I want to lift the world’s sprits, but I cant if I’m getting dragged into quick sand faster than I can climb out. 

[sofeyhh]

BTS Private Boarding School Au

Part 10 / ?

“I’m so proud of our boy,” Jin’s father boasts to Pierre Morten: the surgeon that has worked on every house wife in town, be it a nose job or a breast implant, Cooper Stocker: the son who’s taking over his father’s oil company and Mick Buratto: the president of Hawkings University - an ivy league school.

If it wasn’t obvious enough, Buratto is the one whom his father was interested in. He was playing out all his cards, buttering up Jin’s reputation in school.

“Jin has managed to hold the title of President of the school body for 4 years now. He’s involved in almost half the clubs in school, won a gold medal in this Spring’s debate competition and even has his own magazines published and distributed in school as a side project. And I've recently got news from the Director himself that Jin actually clinched the top spot for the examinations.

His father pushed him forward, patting him hard, trying to get him to saddle up to the Buratto.

“Well technically, I was a point below Kim Namjo-”

Jin choked in a gasp as his father’s grip on his shoulders tightens. He hated when this happens. When his parents would push him into the spotlight with a forced hand.

“My boy here, he’s graduating and has been yapping about attending Hawkings,” Jin’s father chuckled with a fake grin. He was reeling in the big fish. “Didn’t you tell me you applied for a spot in next Summer’s enrollment?”

No, Jin didn’t need to tell him because he, along with Jin’s mother, had filled out the application by themselves. Only telling him about it when they already sealed the envelope, stamp perfectly stuck to the top corner. Even so, Hawkings was and is his dream school ever since he knew how to read. He wanted it and all its glory, and so he nods and smiles as he gushes about his excitement.

It seems that Buratto was pleasantly surprised, oblivious to his father’s blatant attempt at trying to suay his bias opinion, and said he would gladly accept St Strachan Rutherford Academy’s golden boy. At that, his father finally releases his iron grip on his shoulder, presumably satisfied. Without a doubt, Jin was going to see a bruise bloom, black and blue.  

As the adults trail their conversation to politics, he slips away, desperate to find his friends. He had been glued to his parents’ side for hours, pushed from mother to father like a pinball, all to hear them gloat and boast about his accomplishments to everyone. Jin spots Namjoon and his adorable sister on the far side of the big room. Like magnets, he naturally gravitates to his four-eyed friend.

“Save me, please. Take me away from here,” he sighs as he rests his chin on Namjoon’s shoulders.

A smile spreads on Jin’s face as he hears the rumble of Namjoon’s deep chuckle. Oh, how he lived for those - it warms his body in all the right places.

“Mmm, well you might have just migrated to another round of Parents’ Pride,” Namjoon murmurs in his ears. He shifts his body so that he was now holding Jin in his embrace. A hand runs up and down Jin’s arm, soothing him even more.

Namjoon’s mother was animatedly talking about him to a group of ladies while Nara nodded along with the words. Jin listens closely to the conversation, surprised at the choice of topic. It wasn’t at all what he expected from Namjoon’s ‘round of Parents’ Pride’.

“It was delicious, by the grace of God I swear, his Souffle brought me to heaven,” she said. “The three of us were stuffed to the brim from the 3-course meal he cooked. He had stayed in the kitchen for hours, would you believe it?”

His mother had been boasting about...his cooking skills. And the way she boasted, it wasn’t in a conceited way. Instead, they were praises for Namjoon. Beautiful, Jin thought, such a beautiful family.

---

The pair strutted in, heads held high with their chests puffed out. They were channelling their alter-egos, inspired by confident male role-models. It was Will Smith, the inspirational actor/comedian for Hoseok and Leonardo DiCaprio, the charming and astounding actor/activist for Jimin. Yes, they were common figures in the island of “role-model” but heck, they gave the two an air of confidence.

“Are you sure this is working? I feel ridiculous,” Jimin muttered as his eyes dart around.

“Just wait for the turn at the corner.”

Hoseok counts down under his breath as they reached the point. Within seconds, they hear gasps and whispers of girls fawning over them. It felt good, Jimin shamelessly admitted as he daringly stuck out his tongue, licking his smirk. He earns a gratifying squeal and his ego undoubtedly grew high to the sky.

“Look at these idiots,” Taehyung guffawed.

“I’m thanking the gods Nara is still a toddler,” Namjoon scoffs. “I’d dig myself a grave if I had to listen to her grovel over them. Eugh.”

“Somehow, my mother’s fundraising gala always turns out to be soft porn for the girls,” Jin sighs.

The three boys stood by the bar, shaking their heads at their strutting friends, who's currently painting a target board on their backs. Those girls they were trying to impress, were somebody’s younger sister and daughter. They better pray none of them gets overly protective.

“Boys,” Jimin and Hoseok simultaneously sing songed as they gave a dramatic bow. It was strangely in sync not to think that they hadn’t practised it beforehand.

“Hubristic asshats,” Namjoon greeted them back with a raise of his glass.

Hoseok spots the three empty glasses on the bar by Taehyung’s elbow. “You started drinking without us?!”

He gives a grim smile, buzzed out of his brains as his eyes search for one Jeon Jungkook. Since he has arrived, he’s only been face to face with three glasses of bourbons while that muscle pig was yet to be found. He needed his drinking buddy real bad. It didn’t need to be said but everyone else in his posse was too boring to accompany him in his drinking rendezvous. Jin was too prissy, he only sipped fucking iced strawberry champagne. Namjoon never liked to get drunk to the point of hard hitting hangover. Jimin was a goody-two-shoe angel that drank with wide eyes. And Hoseok was too naggy by his 3rd glass.

Plus, there were other reasons that he wanted the icy Jeon Jungkook. It’s been decided after his 2nd glass, Kim Taehyung wanted to play with his toy.

“Oh hey uh, either of you has to be my designated driver again,” Taehyung said distractedly as he waved his finger at Jimin and Hoseok.

He squints at the crowd, catching sight of his prey. Damn, he thought, as his eyes raked over the tight material clinging onto Jungkook’s thick thighs. The all black ensemble he had only accentuated his dark personality and it got Taehyung excited like a puppy. He loves to play with his toy, especially when Jungkook had his hair slicked to the side like he was trying to make Taehyung eye fuck him right there and then.

“He drove here on his own,” Jin explained to the clueless pair when they received no more words from Taehyung. “His father’s sex drive was through the roof.”

“Can’t blame him,” Hoseok said before ordering a glass of margarita. “But I’m drinking tonight because I’ve got shit on my shoulders and I’ve already been this drunken ass’ driver a thousand times. You take the honours Jiminie.”

Jimin gratefully takes the shiny keys away from Taehyung’s pocket just as the gentleman orders another glass. He has never met such a young alcoholic before - Taehyung claims he isn’t one, merely a hard liquor expert.

“New money is the bastard’s driver now?”

The boys turn around to see Jungkook striding up to them with a cocked eyebrow. He was finally free from his father’s clutches and took the chance to slip away. The bar was surrounded by his friends, though he’d prefer it Yoongi was there.

“Why do you call me that? I have a name you know. And so does Tae,” Jimin bristled and scowl. That kid never showed respect to Jimin despite him being younger.

“Don’t be flattered, you’re not that special Mini. I have a name for everyone in the group, it’s practically a form of acceptance,” Jungkook said smugly. “Namjoon’s the brainiac, Hoseok’s the linguist, Yoongi’s the hustler and Jin’s the princess.”

He orders a shot of Vodka and looks Jimin in the eye, challenging him to retort back. The shorter friend always gave such great reactions that it made teasing him easy, a hobby almost.

Jimin crosses his arms. “How is it that everyone’s nickname emphasises on their qualities and I’m left with new money?”

“Hey, he called me princess,” Jin pointed out then muttered to Namjoon, “And I’m weirdly okay with that.” The two quietly chuckled, ignoring Jimin’s piercing glare.

“Ah lighten up will you?” Jungkook coos and pinches his chubby cheeks. Jimin swats it away and grumbled away to Hoseok who was busy with his phone. He downs the shot of vodka and asks for another.

“I want a smoke. Anyone?”

Though his question was offered to the group, he somehow found himself staring at Taehyung, urging him to say yes. He knew the boy didn’t smoke too often but of all the things Jungkook loved, goating his friends into doing something they weren’t too fond of was his favourite. Taehyung nurses his bourbon, swirling it around in the glass as he considers the offer; the fourth glass was going down slower than his previous ones. The bartender slides over Jungkook’s shot, immediately taken by Taehyung.

“Drink it with me outside,” he says, his deep voice dripping with sensuality and leaves for one of the many balconies.

That left his friends’ eyebrows shooting upwards, surprised by the sudden change in atmosphere. They watch Jungkook shuffle with intrigue after Taehyung without a word.

“I told you! He turns into a suave James Dean when he’s drunk.”

“By why is it that he’s only gunning for Jungkook? He literally called me a sexy virgin pirate and slapped my ass at the store the other day.”

“Aw Jin, do you smell burning jealousy?” Namjoon teases Jimin. “Don’t worry young chap, you’re his sober baby boy remember?”

The two older boys snorted at the blushing Jimin as he rambles on about how Taehyung’s pet name for him was solely platonic. Their bickering dulls away as Hoseok receives a text from Yoongi. He moves away from the noise, resting at the corner of the bar with his margarita.

-From: Min Grampy Having fun?

-To: Min Grampy Well Tae’s drunk, Kook’s being an ass and the two Kims are ganging up on Mini. As normal as always. How’s the beach?

Silently, he wished he could ditch the Gala and run straight to the beach. It’s always so beautiful at night - because it was secluded, covered by tall thick trees, it looked like an observatory with a magnifying lens to watch the twinkling stars.

-From: Min Grampy I see constellations but I can’t name them. If you were here, I’d ask you. You’re always good with them.

-To: Min Grampy Is that your subtle way of asking me to come over? My gosh... is that a compliment I hear? :P

-From: Min Grampy My compliments are reserved for people special to me. And I told you before, my invitation is still open. Come over anytime you want...I’m waiting for you.

The sip of margarita he had, went down the wrong pipe after his eyes scanned Yoongi’s reply. As Hoseok coughs up the bitter drink, the blush that crept up his neck, blooming on his cheeks and staining the tip of his ears practically made him look like a stop sign. Thankfully the rest of his friends were too busy to notice his fumbling ass.

Fucking Min Yoongi is going to be the death of him.

---

The frigid September winds bit at their cheeks the second they slid the balcony door open. Taehyung leads the younger boy to the corner, away from the transparent door. If he wanted to play with his toy, he needed a little privacy - as the groups’ designated tabloid, he of all people knew how fast gossips spread through town and especially in school. He settles Jungkook’s Vodka shot on the wide stone bannister, inviting him over.

Silence hung thick over the two friends as they leant on their elbow while taking in the expanse backyard Jin’s family had. It spread as far as a football field before dipping down a cliff to the crashing waves of the open sea. Jungkook handed Taehyung his open pack of cigarettes, seeing if he would do it. A smirk plays on his lips as his friend slips out a slim stick and placing it between his lips.

He shoves away Taehyung’s open palm and murmurs, “Let me do it for you.”

Jungkook leans closer, his thumb flicking to ignite the lighter. Their eyes pierced each other with intensity as the flickering amber flame glows between them. The tension between them heightened - aided by the fourth glass of Bourbon, the two shots of Vodka, the acrid smell of burning tobacco and their estranged relationship.

They’ve never been this close before, always sticking to the different companies in their group. So to find themselves alone in the dark was threatening to tear at the tension. Jungkook lights one for himself and they snap out of their gaze, going back to mockingly admire the backyard quietly.

Sucking in the smoke of the cigarette sent bursts of nicotine up to his brain, creating quite a cocktail when mixed with his four glasses of Bourbon. Taehyung draws it in deep into his lungs, letting it swirl around his tongue before blowing it out with a satisfied sigh.

“Fuck, I miss getting high,” Taehyung admitted. “I haven’t had a joint in months. You’ve got one on you?”

Jungkook scoffs, “Dimwit, what would I bring illegal weed to a public event. If my dad smells that shit on me, he’d have my grave plotted and dug.”

He takes a big puff from his stick and flicks the ashes away from the bannister. They watch the dull grey flakes float in the wind as it drifts further into the darkness. Then, the silence came again. It was unbearable for Taehyung, especially as someone who lives and breathes for commotions.

“Shit, I just remembered, that Mrs Kim’s Crystal Lilies are planted right below this balcony,” Taehyung said, leaning over as he tries to search in the dark.

Jungkook takes a disinterested peek. “Really?” He couldn’t care less if Taehyung decides to take a dump on Mrs Kim’s damn flowers.

“No. I was just joking,” he giggles.

He clears his throat when his joke was met with Jungkook’s deadpan face, not even showing a glint of amusement - or even any kind of emotions. Tough crowd, Taehyung thought as he huffs to himself. It usually works with Hoseok and Jimin - guess they’ve got better taste in humour.

“Jesus man, if you’re going to be throwing lame jokes the whole night, I need to get drunk,” uttered Jungkook as he throws back his shot, letting the liquid burn a trail down his throat.

A drop of Vodka escapes his lips, spilling down his chin and resting on his Adam's apple. It makes Taehyung gulp at the thought of sucking the liquor off of Jungkook’s neck - and he wouldn’t mind sneaking a little bruise on his skin either.  His tongue darts out, wetting his lips.

“God, you’re sexy.”

Jungkook coughs up the Vodka, burning his throat even more. He was baffled by his friend’s brazen words. How drunk was he really? The younger boy cautiously watches Taehyung as down the last drop of his Bourbon. He was suddenly aware of how close they had been and takes a step to his left.

“I’m being honest here. I’ve watched you practice one of the sports thingies where you smack around a ball. Turns me on.”

Taehyung smirked when he sees Jungkook getting flushed. He was fidgeting with his now-too-tight collar, unbuttoning them as he clears his throat. It made Taehyung even more excited when he flinches under his touch. He had closed the distance between them and was rubbing his thumb over Jungkook’s lower lip.

“Your bad boy demeanour is a plus point too.”

His whisper sent shivers down Jungkook’s arms as he stands rooted to the ground under his touch. The sound of his heart racing pounds in his ears while his eyes are sucked into Taehyung’s warm brown ones. He stiffens when he feels him leaning closer, his soft lips touching the side of his neck.

Taehyung relishes in tasting his skin, sucking and licking all the way to his Adam's apple where the trail of Vodka was waiting for him.

“Ah, T-Tae what are you doing?” Jungkook gasps.

He could feel the wetness of Taehyung’s lips and tongue moving on his skin, melting his entire body. Jungkook lets out a strangled moan when he gently bites just below his jaws. Taehyung’s sinful kisses made Jungkook weak in the knees as he grabs onto his shoulders; biting his lips in anticipation of feeling his nerves spark down to his tight pants.

“The things I’d do to hear you moan like that for me,” Taehyung whispers in his ears as he grabs him by the waist.

He pulls them closer, groaning when he feels Jungkook’s thighs rubbing on his hardening member. It was bliss for him to feel his toy under his control, it made him powerful against the feared Jeon Jungkook. Taehyung knew that after tasting him, he’d be pining for his younger friend endlessly and painfully. But at the moment, it didn’t matter. He’d have him right there and then if he could.

“Dinner is ready! Everyone head down to the dining hall, and don’t forget about your arranged seats!”

Jin’s mother and her shrill voice startled the two boys out of their fantasy land. Jungkook immediately pushes Taehyung away, taking a huge step backwards as he wipes his neck with the back of his hand.

“I’m not gay,” he choked out. He said it like he was trying to convince himself instead of Taehyung.

“No one is gay until they try it.”

Taehyung chuckles as he walks away with his empty glass, acting like nothing erotic had happened between them. He grabs onto the bannister as he feels his knees buckling, feeling dazed from Taehyung’s kisses. Fuck, he thought. If he wasn’t gay then why did it feel so good to have him suck away at his neck? And why did it leave him turned on?

BTS AU Masterlist

[daemominus]

TAGGED BY:  @enshrxned

↪ REPOST!! DO NOT REBLOG!!

━━ FULL NAME:  Vergil Bellamy ━━ GENDER & SEXUALITY:  male, (heteroromantic) demisexual ━━ ETHNICITY & SPECIES:  seemingly North American; nephilim ━━ BIRTHPLACE & BIRTHDATE:  Limbo City (state N/A), United States; November 26th (year N/A)

━ GUILTY PLEASURES:  I don’t think anything he likes doing makes him feel guilty. Excessive consumption of sweets, maybe? Like if he’s caught downing a whole pint of Häagen-Dazs-- wait maybe that’s more embarrassing than anything.

━ PHOBIAS:  Fears he has, but phobias? Perhaps mysophobia, but I debate this with myself.

━ WHAT THEY WOULD BE FAMOUS / INFAMOUS FOR:  Forming, heading, and actively taking part in The Order, a known “terrorist” group; being the “masked freak on the ‘net.” Aiding in the demise of a former demon king. Aspiring to rule over humanity, unlike Mundus, though still poised to take his place (though that depends on if word of any of this spreads around).

━ WHAT HAVE THEY / WOULD THEY HAVE GOTTEN ARRESTED FOR:  He has eluded the law thus far, and he’s done so by breaking it. Hacking into state and government databases, manipulating his public and private records, forging "legal” documents, identity theft or manipulation to a degree, falsification of credit or financial records---to name a few. I would also lightly suggest murder, but as I’m aware it was done out of self-defense, and then there’s also indirect mass murder, but that one’s totally unintentional. Haha.................

━ A CHARACTER YOU SHIP THEM WITH:  No canon ones. Only an OC, Bianca, which I’m sure has already become well-known as his lifelong ladylove.

━ CHARACTER MOST LIKELY TO MURDER THEM:  Mundus, if the opportunity were ever there. Though I mean Dante almost did and Vergil pretty much died by Dante’s hand even if it wasn’t instant I mean--

━ FAVORITE BOOK GENRE:  Anything covering the occult/paranormal, though he will prefer nonfiction in regard to these subjects. Handbooks and codices, journals and studies are among those he reads primarily. He’s also keen on reading ancient poetry/prose, or teaching himself to read this. Historical accounts and biographies are quite fun, more than anything, to read. But in any case, he’s always willing to learn something from the material. If it’s educational, he won’t mind reading it: the more knowledge he accumulates, the better.

━ LEAST FAVORITE BOOK CLICHE:  Forced/pointless romance I guess? I don’t think he really cares.

━ TALENTS AND / OR POWERS:  Electronic hacking/infiltration, data manipulation, computer programming, being multilingual, analytical thinking, superhuman senses (and having a sixth sense), swordsmanship and close quarters combat, firearms training. Powers include psychokinesis, memory erasure; his angelic gifts allow him to glide a limited distance, while his demonic gifts allow him to transition instantly from one place to another, though also a limited distance, and to enter a state of enhanced power, Devil Trigger, from which he can generate a doppelganger. He can also conjure projectiles in the shape of swords.

━ WHY SOMEONE MIGHT LOVE THEM:  I think his loyalty and reliability might be the first thing someone would find anchoring. Out of all the things he is, or does, the most comforting part of getting to know him would be finding out that he will defend you, or do something for you which he may have promised previously. He’s true to his word, he won’t fail you. Even if he doesn’t know you all that well, he will hardly find himself betraying or deceiving. He does have a sense of justice to follow, and his own morality will push him to doing right by you---if you deserve it. That alone, I believe, would be more than enough to put him in someone’s favor. Superficial traits aside, he’s fairly lovable depending on you.

━ WHY SOMEONE MIGHT HATE THEM:  AND THE FLIP SIDE IS that he’s just as easy to hate. It might be easier for an outsider to take note of the traits that make him unappealing, even repellent. Perhaps his critical, keen eye might become annoying very fast. His tendency toward suspicion might tire you. I believe it’s his arrogance and his pride that may very well discourage people the most. He will always place himself above humanity, boast of his blood and his prowess. He’s going to distance himself from human nature, even deny that he is much like a human for the sake of perching atop his pedestal. His ego is swelled, thus rather sensitive. You may think he’s pretentious, self-entitled, and self-serving, and you’d be right for the most part. No one really likes a prima donna.

━ HOW THEY CHANGE:  He doesn’t in any way that would lend him grace. The period encompassing his downfall and his own ascension is a short one, but it impacts him in deep ways. Maybe when he was once naive, tolerant, and good-humored, he would have become more cynical, prone to impatience and frustration, and less likely to extend amiability. If he was cautious before, then he’s as good as paranoid now. He is less willing to trust in others, less willing to form bonds. In fact, it’s a heavy challenge to clear these hurdles if you’re the one trying to get close to him. In the past, he may have held a neutral position toward angels; leaving Hell, however, has damaged his view of them almost irreversibly. He hates them now, can’t stand them. And I’m just listing off a handful of changes he’s gone through, from post-game to post-Vergil’s Downfall. I haven’t even touched upon the physical and mental impacts the trial has had over him. From growing more powerful, he’s lost mental stability. In fact, he is continually losing his mind to the corruption he harbors. This, as well as entering Devil Trigger, also takes a toll on his physical health---mainly that of his heart. It’s all a slow progression, however, probably meant to prolong the inevitable so that he may feel it and struggle through. In short: he becomes darker, more demonic, more twisted in his points of view. BUT you can’t really tell at first glance. It takes some digging to realize what’s happened to him.

━ WHY YOU LOVE THEM:  He’s cute and a baby. The fruit of my loins. I really do see him as a good boy even though he’d fucked up along the way. His intentions were good, albeit not entirely selfless, but it’s his sentiment behind his actions that led everything to happen in the first place. Aside from some plot holes and iffy writing and vague shit that hasn’t been fleshed out, I feel like his reactions to everything, though exaggerated or just plain questionable, are realistic and justifiable based on who he is, how he thinks, how he deals with his emotions, etc. He’s not supposed to be a “normal” person (because he ain’t human to begin with lmao), he’s grown up differently, he’s fueled by different instincts, and on top of that he’s got a few personality issues, an inferiority complex to some degree, and all of these things are meant to make him the way he is. And because of this, I feel strongly that he is believable. He has things wrong with him, he’s totally wrong in some ways, fucked up in others, and I love that. It helps reinforce his characterization; like he can build justification upon justification with personality traits alone. There’s always a reason that a part of him is, whether or not it’s flawed. He might be blind to some flaws and accepting of others, and all of this helps build his layers. I find that he’s very complex, has many facets to his being. I’ve always been impressed by that. I, myself, have a hard time on occasion to explain one thing or another about him because there’s so much there to explore and understand, and every point has an added side to it. I’m not blind to the wrongs, but I’ll admit I’m so biased and defensive of him that I’m always going to deny the idea that he’s a villain, your classic antagonist. He shouldn’t have been treated that way, reduced to a foil, which I honestly think is pretty unfair considering how the twins handled one another’s differences? In the first place Vergil is just too careful to say outright that he’s gonna rule humanity?? Like I’m sorry but it’s totally unfair in my eyes that he was set up to be the bad guy and IT HURTS MAN, IT HURTS. And yeah I’m gonna blame Dante for choosing to put up his dukes rather than talk it out with his brother who, by the way, hadn’t suggested in the slightest that they fight out their differences. I mean your own flesh and blood who you’ve just started to rebuild a kinship with? Who really wanted you in his life because damn it he loved his brother and he didn’t want to lose you again?? And you want to fight him so fast??? Sorry that’s wrong, you didn’t even give my boy a chance to save face smh. Bitch all I’m saying is he ain’t a villain at heart because he’s got no evil intent during the main game; post-Downfall he’s pretty fucked up because of that dark shit he embraced and now he feels betrayed beyond belief and I have more to say I will fight everyone--

TAGGING:  whoever’s inspired to fill this out tbh