#i had to scrap my initial idea bc i didn’t like it

[jellyfiishbones]

oh also nsmap chapter. holy hell <3

[goldsainz]

GUESS WHO’S BACK? — one shot.

pairing: daniel ricciardo x reader

MASTERLIST.

NOTE: first of i wanna say that this is not meant to diminish the treatment nyck got bc it is undoubtedly shitty (helmut marko you will pay for your crimes), i am just happy one of my fav drivers is back. this is eminem!daughter!reader an idea @lorarri let me use, all the lyrics and song she came up with are fantastic, i couldn’t have made this without them, so thank you lola!!!!

liked by danielricciardo, eminem and 3,082,719 others

yourusername i am so excited to announce my newest album “BADGER BEWARE”!! this project has been in the making for quite some time, it has the help of people i am very close with. and inspirations behind a lot of impacting moments in my life. which is why i am so happy that it is finally here and you can all enjoy it july 13th

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ynfan1 oh this is so about daniel

ynfan2 NEW MUSIC FINALLY😭😭

danielricciardo 💛💛💛

liked by yourusername and 96,053 others

⤷ danielfan1 acting as if the album isn’t gonna be dedicated to him

icespice gonna be bomb 🔥

scottyjames31 Claiming track 3 right now

⤷ danielricciardo No, it’s already claimed. Pick another.

ynfan3 july 13th cannot come any sooner

danielfan2 i hope y/n knows that she just sent me into cardiac arrest

danielfan3 MONZA MASH??? YOU’RE TELLING ME SHE MADE A SONG FOR HIS WIN IN MONZA

ynfan4 thank you eminem for the blessing that is y/n🙏

liked by charles_leclerc, bellahadid and 3,950,416 others

yourusername “BADGER BEWARE” is out now in all streaming platforms! i wanna take a moment to thank all the people who made this album possible, to the man who inspired this project and sat with me until sunrise writing down lyrics, to my friends who participated and helped me push through, but especially to all my fans who waited patiently for me to release my music in my own time. have fun and pls don’t take what i talk about too seriously (or do 😉)

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danielricciardo I would sit until sunrise every day with you

⤷ yourusername love the sentiment but you were asleep 90% of the time

⤷ danielricciardo But I was still there!

ynfan21 RED WINGS IS WILD

ynfan22 album of the year!!!

danielfan21 oh so this is a diss track to mclaren…

redbullracing Our playlist has been updated!

liked by yourusername and 107,368 others

ynfan23 when we needed her most she appeared🙏

ynfan24 damn she did not hold back

danielfan22 DANIEL AND Y/N BEST COUPLE ON THE GRID

“Show-stopping” is the expression Y/N wants to convey each time she sits down and starts to write her songs. It is a “big word”, as she puts it, but there is no other word that would fit the feeling she hopes to transmit through her music.

“I started writing “BADGER BEWARE” back in 2021, I think around august, and by the end of that year I had written 3 songs. I stopped writing because I thought of either scrapping the whole project or making a 4-5 song EP. Obviously that didn’t end up happening because now there are 10 songs, 1 intro and 1 outro. All those songs hold a different place in my heart and while they all form part of the genre of Rap, they’re heartfelt in their own special way.”

Rap is a genre Y/N is all too familiar with. With her father being Eminem, an icon to the genre and the 2000s — even now. She says that the choice is not arbitrary, that there is an influence she cannot deny, but chooses to embrace it rather than push it away.

She dedicated the album to her boyfriend of 3 years, Daniel Ricciardo, who was the initial inspiration behind it. “Danny listened to me rant about my ideas for hours, sat in different studios with me and suggested different things that made the whole experience different than anything I’d ever done before. He also introduced me to — now one of my good friends — Charles Leclerc, who plays piano and is the one that composed the music for both the intro and outro.”

When asked about her favourite songs she picked a couple because “there is no way I could choose just one”. There is an evident passion to her craft when it comes to Y/N, something not everyone in her field possesses quite as well as she does.

“HONEY, RED WINGS and SUMMER SMILE are probably my top 3. They were all written at such drastically different points of my life, about things that have practically nothing to do with each other but that are tied by a little string. Some people think I pick my singles because they’re my favourite, which is true because all my songs are my favourites! But most of all I pick them because they’re the ones that I felt most comfortable publicising, all the other songs in the album are like a little secret between my fandom and me.

“There are also songs which are more personal. MONZA MASH, for example, it’s a very hyper song but it still is about an event that was very emotional. TEARS OF THE SUN, is also an obvious one. My songs are about something, and if it makes you feel anything at all then I did my job right.”

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE!

liked by tayrussell, saweetie and 2,785,046 others

yourusername 2 THE MAX MV IS HERE!! i heard it was a fan favourite and had to deliver… there is no way to express my gratitude to you all for the support the album has gotten, so i guess this is my way!

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ynfan31 MY FAV SONG YES

⤷ danielfan31 “i turn up the heat to the max and watch them bitches squirm” ATE THAT SHIT UPPP

ynfan32 y/n mathers?? MORE LIKE Y/N MOTHER

danielricciardo She’s wearing red, next question!

⤷ yourusername LMAO??

⤷ maxverstappen1 Let him be, he’s a bit jet-lagged

ynfan33 literally fell down the stairs bc of this announcement

danielfan32 forget daniel… I WANT HER

ynfan34 as a y/n fan i am more than amazed at the amount of content we’re getting😭

ynfan35 it suddenly got real hot

⤷ ynfan36 we call that “the y/n effect”

ynfan37 LITERALLY RUN ME OVER!!!!!!

[malfoyfarms]

She Wanted You

JJ Maybank x Routledge!Reader

Word Count:1.4k

Warnings:none

A/n: angst bc im boycotting watching season three LOL, not my gif

“What do you mean she left?” JJ questioned, dumbfounded. He didn’t realize it, but he was walking into a war zone. The Chateau no longer had the same feel. It was like someone sucked the air out, and pumped smog in. 

With tears in his eyes, John B pointed towards his sister’s room. Sarah and Pope were lingering in there, but JJ had no idea why. The room was oddly neat, incredibly out of character of the girl who resided there. Her closet was emptier than usual, the three picture frames that once had pictures of her with her family and friends were empty. What caught JJ’s eyes next, made his mouth go dry. His breath was no longer there. The navy sweatshirt he had given her years ago was folded, on the bed, next to the pillow he always claimed during their relationship. Atop the sweatshirt was a ring from a gumball machine, an orange and green friendship bracelet made of paracord, and a pile of notes written on scraps of random papers. Every other personal belonging was missing from its spot. 

JJ tore through the girl’s nightstand, and when he realized the box of her life savings was gone, he let out a string of colorful words and kicked the stand.

“Here, you should read this.” Sarah handed him a neatly written note. By the tear stains on Pope’s face, the somber tone from the kook, and JB’s raging anger, it was a farewell. 

He took a deep breath, and swiped the letter from Sarah. The familiar handwriting was already pulling at his heart.

J,

I’ve rewritten this letter four times already, and I still don’t know how to put my thoughts into actual words. Firstly, I love you. I love you until the waves stop coming in. I love you so much that I knew I needed to leave. I’ve known since you wandered home with John B in third grade, and gave me all the answers (even though they were wrong) to my math homework that if there was going to be another boy in my life, he was going to have to fight you for that spot. From 7 years old, I only ever wanted you. But over the last two years, I can see that I’m not the one for you. And that is why I’m leaving. One of the only things that got me through my day was seeing you smile, but I understand that there is someone else who causes those crinkles by your eyes.

I have to leave because it’s too painful. I need time to have all your kisses leave my body, I need to leave because I can’t smell the ocean, listen to Akon and Konvict, or even wash my fucking clothes without thinking of you. I see you in body language, in the waves, in every damn aspect of my life. Not only are we ingrained on this island, but you are ingrained in me. If I’m ever going to come home I need to remove every trace. 

I told you last week, I’d always be on your team, even from a distance. I need you to pursue Kiara because there is nothing more I want for you than happiness. Deep down, I know it will always be her. While that sentence feels like a shot, I’m coming to terms with it. 

Don’t try to come find me, either. I won’t be going to any of the places we’ve ever talked about, I do have my secrets still. Not Yucatan, not Tybee, and certainly not Jekyll. Take care of my brother.

All my love, 

Y/N

“When did you and Y/N break up?” Sarah asked. JJ couldn’t even think straight. Y/N and the boy broke up about a week ago, for that specific reason, JJ thought there was something there with Kiara. He didn’t think the girl would pick up her stuff and bolt. Leave her brother, her best friends, and the life she claimed to love. 

“I, uh, initiated it last week or so,” he stuttered, “it wasn’t definite or anything, but it was insinuated I guess. We had a conversation about it, but I don’t think I ever could have said it out loud.”

“Oh,” she thought. “You know she really loved you with every bone in her body.”

He sucked in a deep breath to try to keep his tears at bay. How could he walk out to the front room and face John B. He was the reason the youngest Routledge had left. With Big John gone, she was all he had left. Hell, with Luke gone, she was all JJ had too. In some form he robbed his friends of a family member. 

JJ laid down on the neatly made bed and latched onto the sweatshirt that smelled just like her. His memory flooded with images of Y/n in that sweatshirt. From it covering her bikini when they went night swimming, it being the one sweatshirt that was specifically for after she came home from school, the one thing that grounded her when she was having a rough day. JJ felt his chest start to tighten, and his hands were clammy and shaking. 

“I thought you said you’d never break her heart!” JB screamed. Impeccable timing. 

“John B don’t–” Sarah tried to interject.

“No Sarah, he promised. He promised me almost three years ago that if I gave him permission to date Y/n, he wouldn’t hurt her. He knew he’d be breaking more than just her heart. And now I can’t even help her pick up the pieces. I can’t fix my baby sister, the way she fixed each and every one of us!” 

“Bro, you think this is what I wanted? I had a conversation with her. Nothing was definitive. It’s not my fault she took her shit and ran!”

“When has Y/n ever not taken her feelings and ran? Name one time!”

JJ sat there in thought, and there had been one time she didn’t run, and he had promised that he wouldn’t tell. He was going to anyway.

“When you disappeared. I held her while she cried herself to sleep for nights on end. So don’t act like I never treated her right. You know I did.” JB ran his hands through his hair and left the room. 

“Until you decided you may have feelings for the girl who is like her big sister.” That stung. 

“What’s going on?” Kie asked.

“She’s gone.” John B said. “‘Cuz JJ’s in love with you.”

~~

JJ sat in the hammock, wearing the navy sweatshirt he hadn’t worn in years. It smelled just like her. He could even feel the marks of where she rolled the sleeves and dug her thumbs into the side. 

He barely remembered last week’s conversation about Kie, but never did he think that it would cause you to disappear. Y/n was so incredibly loyal. She wanted him. Every. Damn. Day. She wanted him when the clouds were out, and the usually blue sky was gray. She wanted him when he was bruised and beat up, she wanted him when he was crabby after a 14 hour shift, she wanted him at every hour of the day in any way she could have him. 

It was just a conversation, he thought. He never flat out said that he was leaving her for the tanned, wealthy kook. 

He felt so fucking stupid. He felt so much self-hatred. He remembered when they were 12 and 14, and Y/n wanted to walk to the gas station a few streets over, but John B wouldn’t go with her. He remembered what she usually bought. Peach iced tea, sour straws and a bag of munchie mix. Every single time. 

He remembered when the girl got drunk for the first time and dialed him to come get her. God, she was so inebriated. She clung to the boy, giggling profusely. That was the first night she ever told the boy she loved him. Y/n never knew it, but JJ kept that memory locked in his head. 

He pondered the time she was ready to give him her virginity. He remembered how nervous she was, but how much she trusted him. 

It had grown dark by the time he wandered back into the Chateau. He was surprised JB didn’t kick him out, he fully expected to be out on the streets by now. As he stumbled towards the bedrooms, he went past his own, and fully dove into the light purple sheets he had come to love. She’ll come back, he thought. She has to.

[pocketscribbs]

I've always wondered, what made you start to ship Tangle and Espio in the first place? It's cute but what's the reasoning?

Saved this question for Valentine’s Day, grab a seat folks, bc it’s a bit of a story.

So, rewind back to the summer of 2023. I was writing down potential comic ideas, specifically unlikely characters interactions (think IDW Sonic 2022 Annual).

TMOSTH had recently dropped at that time, Espio having a prominent role in it, so naturally I wanted to write him interact with my favorite character.

Tangle’s the kind of character who’s seems to have a fun dynamic with just about everyone, but up until that point, I didn’t have more than a basic understanding of Espio’s character. My understanding of his at the time was that he was just a calmer, ninja version of Knuckles. Then Tmosth happened and he was becoming my one of my favs.

I don’t remember how I initially came up with the story idea, but it’s since then been scrapped bc I don’t have time to draw it all, but the story I had in mind was that Tangle wanted to train with Espio after seeing the Chaotix helping Jewel with some missing person cases at the Restoration.

As I tried to plan out little bits of their training session, I started to feel like they’d really get along well and be a fun duo. And then a split second thought occurred: “Lol what if I shipped them?” So I started to play with that concept, and what I got I thought was genuinely really sweet.

It only got better as I learned more about Espio. Like how he’s a pretty awkward with hugs, and while he can be reassuring and wise, his serious behaviors will sometimes be unintentionally comedic, he tries to be the levelheaded one, but he’s still a Chaotix, can’t deny he is also silly XD.

I thought he and Tangle balanced really well. Flash-forward to now, and Tangle and Espio are my two favorite characters, my rarepair, but more importantly just a duo I’d love to see in the comics💜🩶

[petertingle-yipyip]

okay bestie I have an actual question for you about writing, because I always just have so many ideas but don't know where to start/never complete them. so like how do you start do you plot everything out and then start writing or are you writing and figure it out during? and like how do you keep motivated writing every chapter? omg and what do you do when something you had in mind doesn't work out with the plot? help pls

hi bestie!! i talk a lot so imma put a break for others to scroll past lol

so, ideas. inspiration. motivation. plot. it comes and goes. movies, music, random quotes, plot ideas/requests come from like anywhere for me. what i tend to do is name the project, write a basic summary and what character it’s for, and see what happens. i don’t force myself to finish any one project (hence the abandoned SOUR miniseries and recently revisited sin miedo). that’s in part why WCS and MAG have been such long running sagas here, bc i don’t force myself to write anymore.

when i did, i produced content that i didn’t love. i was posting stories that i wasn’t confident in and that i read and am embarrassed to have put that out.

typically, it starts with a bit of dialogue that comes to me in the shower or when i’m daydreaming at work. from there, i kinda work backwards. how’d they get to that conversation? what are the implications? what’s the setting? what do they know? all that world building fills itself in and sometimes i pick stuff for the fun of it.

when something doesn’t work, i change something. for example, mag s1 has some stuff that doesn’t match the canon timeline bc one, i didn’t plan on extending the series so far so i was nitpicking what i wanted and two i didn’t have the episodes in front of me bc i wasn’t planning a whole canon journey. i took out some relationships (matt x claire for example) bc it didn’t serve my plot.

i’ve also rewritten plots bc i just didn’t like them. i have a project where the reader is matt’s gf and is meeting foggy/karen but matt has the idea for a game where they just flirt with each other till his friends figure it out. initially i had it to where foggy starts flirting with her and introduces her and she plays along till matt gets too jealous but i didn’t like the way it was turning out. so i scrapped it and started over.

a big part of writing, in my opinion, is drafts and edits. ultimately, whatever your writing, it’s your universe. it’s your project. if something isn’t working, you are well within your rights to change it. it’s not canon until you post it so rewrite it as many times as you have to. no one said you have to immediately post what you write. it’s a little different with mag since i’ve established her entire dd canon and hinted her punisher canon so i have to fill the gaps of what ive already made so i have to keep referencing what ive posted to make sure she’s consistent but that’s it own thing.

lastly, let’s talk motivation. girly pop, it’s gonna come and go. i take so many breaks in posting or writing just bc im at a part that i don’t wanna write but i have to for plot purposes. sometimes i hate the exposition of a piece but i just wanna do the actual important scenes. so i lag and avoid it until im like ‘yknow what, let’s just do it’ and this is where the edits and drafts come in. usually, it’s just a ‘let’s throw some words on the page and come back to it’ situation. sometimes i rewrite all of it, sometimes i don’t, other times it’s just a few edits here or there.

the base of writing as i understand it is trusting yourself and your ideas. some stuff is gonna take off, like woman, others will fall flat like dirty thoughts (i think that’s what i called it, a marc spector piece). it’s also your blog so as long as it feels genuine to you and your abilities, go for it :)

[carpetcat2]

Want yo know your fusion knights better! 😲

16. What makes their stomach turn?

21. Why do they get up in the morning?

B) What inspired you to create them?

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

Sorry for the long wait ^_^u 16. What makes their stomach turn? They're all toughies! I'm sure most of them could handle things the average person would find creepy or crawl-y. Most of them would agree that whatever degree Parasite is awful, though.

21. Why do they get up in the morning?

Hiber: To appreciate nature <3 and to take care of basic health needs that's really important too. Snare: Sometimes he doesn't. Wheel: Spite. Psilo: For the thrill of discovery! Every new day is an opportunity to learn plenty of new things! Like "hey, did you know there were a billion spiders under your porch?" Very cool. Train bros: Well, they've got a business to run, don't they? They have to make sure the trains run on time! Lumin: There are always new stories to be collected. Tales of treasure and tales of woe, of fortune and of fate. Parasite: "Oh boy! I can't wait to make other people's lives miserable! On purpose!"

B) What inspired you to create them?

I wholeheartedly love character design exercises and this was one of my favorites.

D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look?

I have plenty of concept art for these guys lol. I think Hiber, Wheel, and Steam are the only ones that basically didn't change too much from their initial concepts.

Design notes -

Hiber was a lot skinnier before, but she has a lot more meat on her bones now bc I wanted her to fit more into her hibernating theme. Gotta have enough meat survive the winter.

Snare was always gonna be big and tall and imposing, but it took a lot more finangling than I first thought to finalize his design. His earlier concepts had a more armored and ragged look. One cool idea that I scrapped was that he'd have his head and hands in a pillory, but he had extra arms on his back that he could use instead. Another one was that he’d carry around a giant coffin and smack people around with it the same way Puzzle used his compass. Those were overhauled bc they leaned into Specter a bit too much, and felt incohesive with his theming. I ended up taking more design notes from BodySwap Specter since they had a bit more design overlap with Puzzle. In was a fun decision in the end bc I think that caused him to look a little like Luan too.

I think I had a pollution theme going on in Lumin’s early concepts. He was and still is based off of siphonophores so I imagined he would steer around some long train of boats absolutely filled with human garbage and human treasures, but underneath they’d be attached to some gigantic eldritch sea monster. I think his earlier concepts had mechanical arms for some reason. I think I’ve solidified him into being a vaguely eldritch creature cosplaying as a goofy pirate trope, but his design itself is still a bit of a work in progress.

Coal and Steam were supposed to be one guy, but I couldn’t decide between making the one guy a conductor or an engineer so I had to split them up. I don’t think they changed too much from their initial designs except for some tweaks, like giving Coal a belt and fixing his hat, or shaving off a few inches from Steam.

Wheel’s design is mainly based off bikers and medieval jousters. One thing that didn’t make it in was her also being a cowboy(?????). I got rid of that pretty quickly bc trying to fit too many concepts into one character would be really messy, but I mourn the fact that I couldn’t figure out how to fit in wheel spurs in her boots. Her final design didn’t stray too far from her first concept, but some stuff was reworked.

The funny thing about Psilo is that I specifically chose Plague, Spore, and Prism as his components bc they had a lot of similar design elements. That turned out to be more of a challenge rather than a convenience bc I had to actively work to make Psilo Not look like one guy over the other. He still looks too much like Plague Knight, but I will keep convincing myself he is not a Plague clone. I wanted to go for a witch-y design for him at first, and I settled on that for a while. I don’t really remember why I went in a different direction but I guess it’s bc I wanted to represent Prism and Spore more in the design. I think his final helmet was actually based on concept art of Plague Knight from the SK artbook where he had a bottom visor that made him look like he had a big toothy grin, which was really cute and convenient for incorporating Spore’s visor.

A Lot happened with Parasite. I was gonna settle on "grouchy old man" Parasite, but he was being developed to be used in a friend's DnD campaign as an enemy and said friend characterized him very differently to that idea, so I wanted to make him fittingly look unhinged. The way I draw him now vs his current "official" render is a bit different, but that mostly comes down to me getting a better idea of his proportions rather than any significant design changes. Sorry about how disorganized this concept compilation is. I'll try to organize these by character later.

[autisticandroids]

Okay so this was a while back but im preety sure you had mentioned an au of yours where dean is a serial killer and cas successfully stalks him but i don't think you talked about it more than that and i just really want to hear a bit more bc that idea sounds so tastefully fucked up

okay so. weeks later i finally end up answering this ask. it inspired this post btw. anyway spn is a show that's like. all about justifications, as i said in the post inspired by this ask. it's about having no choice and doing what you have to do. and like there is the phantasy embedded in it, a phantasy that is both indulged and punished. but most importantly it's justified. the monsters are super strong to show how brave our heroes are for fighting them, the main characters let out great wails of grief every time their lady loves are violently ripped from them (even though now they are free to do whatever they want), the narrative twists to show our heroes as correct whatever they do. the fantasy (of being allowed to enact violence, of being free from feminine "control," of being right) comes first. the material construction of the universe of supernatural comes afterward. whatever the fantasy is, the universe of supernatural will provide material conditions to justify its acting-out.

and what this means is that our protagonists, dean in particular, are constantly doing just horrific things, which in any other circumstance would be unconscionable. but the universe of supernatural provides justification for these acts. the point of my serial killer au which i think about so so so much is to ask the question: what if these justifications melted out from under their feet? what if dean was left holding nothing but a lie and the weight of everything he's done?

therefore, the premise of my au is such (under the cut because this baby is long):

john and mary winchester, in the mid seventies, joined a doomsday cult known as the men of letters. the men of letters were rather unusual for a doomsday cult, in that they believed that the apocalypse could be prevented by human behavior. this started as correct living, correct worship, yadda yadda, the kind of behavior and thought control that cults are known for, but with the justification of: if you don't do this, the world will end. eventually, this escalated to human sacrifice. the men of letters managed to untraceably kill two homeless people in the late seventies. but they eventually fell apart. however, a month after john and mary left the men of letters (mostly john's choice, mary still believed), mary died in a house fire. john took it as a sign from god that actually, the men of letters were right, and the world would end unless john himself did something about it. so he took some of the (intensely numerological) theology of the men of letters. and he worked out his own formula. and he applied it to the yellow pages. and started ritualistically killed people to prevent the apocalypse, with his two sons in the back of the car.

now, obviously, this is some kind of grief induced temporary madness on john's part, shaped by the mental abuse he suffered in the men of letters. but the thing is, once you've killed a couple of people to prevent the apocalypse. well. there's this thing called the sunk costs fallacy. john wasn't gonna question his own beliefs after that.

and he raised his boys to believe it, too, or at least he raised dean to. they didn't tell sam what they did until he was twelve, and sam didn't buy it, tried to call the cops on them several times but in the end, they always prevented him. eventually sam ran off to stanford, where he now lives under a cloud of guilt that he's too loyal to his family to rat them out.

john died a few years back of a heart attack, but dean is convinced it's because he messed up a ritual two weeks before it happened, so it pushed him further into this belief system.

dean's killings (and john's before him) are ritualistic and distinctive, obviously the same killer each time. but they happen anywhere in the united states, seemingly at random, there are inconsistent amounts of time between each one (sometimes as short as days, sometimes as long as years), and there is no particular victim profile. obviously, since our killers are following an arcane mathematical formula to make their choices for them, but the police don't know that.

castiel novak is an unemployed shut-in with a small inheritance which he's living off of, a cryptography degree, and an obsession with all things morbid. he spends most of his time on the reddit true crime forums, playing amateur sleuth. by complete chance, he happens to recognize one of the symbols frequently used in corpse displays by the so-called sioux falls satanic slaughterer (so named because the first time three of his victims were in the same part of the country, it so happened that they were all in sioux falls, south dakota. this was in the late eighties.) as being mostly only used by a little known cult group called the men of letters, which dissolved in the mid eighties.

he only notices this because, as a teen, he had a special interest in cults and fringe religious groups. the men of letters weren't a particularly notable or well known phenomenon; they were small, and a lot like every other cult that formed during the seventies cult boom. (no outsider ever heard about the human sacrifice; there were rumors, of course, but they were garbled, sensationalized, and mixed up with satanic panic fodder.)

(the men of letters' two sacrifices were nothing particularly romantic or fantastical. they first lured panhandler josie sands back to their compound with promises of food and a warm bed when she admitted she couldn't get a bed at a shelter, and was thinking of getting caught shoplifting just so she could be under a roof in the county jail. the men of letters' leader, a man who took on the name alistair, forced his inner circle to dress in the ceremonial black robes he had given them when he initiated them into his nearest and dearest, and which his wife had sewn out of old bed sheets and dyed black with home made oak gall dye. these robes still left black smudges on the wearer's skin occasionally if they sweated too much. josie was laid, bound, on the altar, a slapdash thing constructed over the course of two days from scrap plywood and a couple of milk crates. a rich red tablecloth purchased at macy's for $3.99 hid its ugliness and gave it grandeur. alistair attempted to kill the struggling miss sands by bringing a sharpened kitchen knife down on her bosom and piercing her heart, but, having never killed a human or even slaughtered an animal before, was unaware of the problem presented by the human ribcage. after rather ineffectually poking at the area beneath sands' bosom with his knife while she shrieked in pain and terror for about ninety seconds, alistair tried a different tack, and slit her throat, which worked just fine, and she bled out quite nicely. the second and final victim of the men of letters was a local vagrant named larry ganem, an older gentleman who walked with a limp. he was lured back to the compound in approximately the same manner as sands, but instead of being bound, he was fed stew laced with sleeping pills. even if alistair hadn't slit his throat, he wouldn't have woken up. it's actually arguable whether he was still alive at time of sacrifice; mary winchester (eight months into her first pregnancy), who, as a member of the inner circle, was in attendance, actually tried to take ganem's pulse as he lay on the altar (now covered by a different tablecloth; the red one had turned stiff with sands' blood and been subsequently burned) and found nothing, so it is entirely possibly only sands' death can be directly laid at alistair's feet, and ganem's is the fault of mrs. ellen harvelle, who prepared the laced stew. regardless, these two deaths are lessons in the nature of human evil: it is very rarely skilled, suave, or smooth. it's often slapdash, half-hearted, and just plain incompetent. but that makes it no less grisly. alistair may have begun to drink his own kool-aid, as it were, and escalated this far out of genuine belief that the apocalypse was coming and it was up to him to stop it, but it is far more likely that he sensed the imminent collapse of his little empire, and wanted to bind his subjects to him through the horrors of shared guilt, considering two lives a small price to pay for the continued loyalty of his inner circle. and the tactic worked: the men of letters didn't start to collapse in earnest until almost four years later. perhaps if alistair had continued the killings, the men of letters could have lasted for far longer, maybe even up until the present day. but it seems that alistair, a psychiatrist by training and unused to violence, simply didn't have the stomach for it. unlike, say, john winchester, who before his time with the men of letters had done a two year tour in vietnam, during which he had killed three living, thinking human beings with the american government's go-ahead.)

anyway. castiel is the first person, ever, to make the connection between the men of letters and the sioux falls satanic slaughterer. and once that connection is made, castiel begins to research the men of letters far more in-depth. and he notices something: the theology of the men of letters was intensely numerological, filled with patterns, significant numbers, and even spiritual equations.

castiel thinks of the seemingly random selection of the slaughterer's victims, and has an epiphany.

he cracks all his fingers, and gets coding.

six months. it takes castiel six months to discover an equation that could fit the slaughterer's pattern. it's complex, but also clearly based on several of the men of letters' holy numbers, and accounts for every single one of the killings. it also suggests that there should have been two or three more deaths scattered across the years, but more than likely those did happen, it's just that they weren't reported as part of the slaughterer's portfolio.

but much more importantly, castiel's model can also make predictions. there will be two killings, fifteen days apart, in a city seven hours' drive away, six weeks from now.

so castiel waits. and he books a hotel room. and two months later, he's waiting outside 217 oak street when a shadowy figure climbs up a tree and lets itself into the upstairs window.

dean winchester is feeling particularly all alone in the world when he breaks into maisey banks' home (217 oak street). his father has been dead for half a decade, and he hasn't spoken to his baby brother for twice that. it's not like this whole grizzly saving the world business makes him a lot of friends. so once he's done killing maisey (which is easy, she was ninety three and dying of cancer anyway. she doesn't even wake up when he slits her throat) and arranging her corpse in the appropriate manner, with prayers and sigils, he turns around. and sees a man standing behind him.

smiling slightly.

as he watches dean gut this old woman.

dean freezes.

the man takes a step forward.

"you're very attractive for a serial killer who's been operating since the eighties."

dean is silent.

"family business, is it?"

silence continues.

"i'm not here to report you to police. i'm just here to see if my algorithm worked right."

and dean finally breaks his silence: "what the hell is wrong with you?"

what's fun here is that dean knows (or rather "knows") that he isn't a serial killer. so he finds what cas is doing, this amoral serial killer stormchasing, morally repugnant. because cas has no way of knowing he isn't a regular serial killer.

there's also the fact that that cas proceeds to flirt with him. aggressively. and follows him back to his motel.

but the thing is that dean is all alone in the world. and as cas continues trailing him around, he starts getting, well, flattered. and feeling a little bit less alone.

it doesn't take very long before they fall into bed. even if cas is an amoral stalker with a fetish for what dean considers a distasteful yet necessary vocation.

so. they fall into bed. they fall in love. they make a little life together, in dean's big sexy car. dean tries to explain to cas that he's saving the world. that these people's lives are a necessary price to pay. and cas seems to listen.

of course, castiel doesn't believe a word of it. but he's found that he likes dean. really likes him. and he realizes that the collapse of dean's belief system would destroy him.

so he sets about becoming as complicit in it as possible.

even to the extent where, when dean is hit by a car and ends up into the hospital a day before one killing is meant to take place, castiel agrees to take on the job. (he doesn't actually kill anyone, obviously. but he does use his extensive skill with computers to create three fake newspaper articles which make it look like he has.)

but five years later, something goes wrong. really, really wrong. dean miscalculates the formula. and by the time he checks his work, the actual date of the next kill, as demanded by the formula, has passed. in fact, so have three others. and the world didn't end.

dean collapses. he hyperventilates. all those people. all those people. for no reason. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people. all those people.

cas seems totally unfazed. dean stares at him in shock. but cas just takes dean in his arms, and whispers in his ear: "oh, dean, i never believed in the equation. i love you no matter what you've done."

and dean buries his face in cas' chest.

[ddarker-dreams]

How do all the other stands feel ab sr? I’m sure they all somewhat get along, right?

i’ve been wanting to give a longer, traditional hc style post about this!! since you’ve asked it’s the perfect opportunity to express my thoughts on it. it’s more of a combination of SR with the user and their stand, i hope that’s okay hjrktme

Bruno Bucciarati;

Sticky Fingers is the first Stand from Bucciarati’s group that you got to see! So there’s a special place in your heart for it. By extension, Bruno was the first person to see Scarlet Ribbons. SR was very inquisitive during their initial meeting, since it’s the first time she ever saw a Stand other than herself. She was looking around a lot, and lowkey wondering where are this things bows at?? 

Though Stand powers wildly vary from one another, Bruno was able to give you a general explanation of what to expect from SR. He didn’t want to go too overboard with advice because he feels a natural fighting style stemming from your own abilities/instinct is best, especially since your Stand is created from your soul. He basically just told you to go with your gut, which at the time felt a bit frustrating... it turned out to be good advice though! 

Sticky Fingers and SR have almost opposite abilities in a way? SR can close up gaps whereas Sticky Fingers opens them up. It’s not uncommon that when you and Bruno are chatting, that your respective Stands are just kinda messing around in the distance. Sticky Fingers likes making zippers in walls, and SR tries to see if she can close them with ribbons... it doesn’t work like that, but it’s kinda endearing to see them interact with one another lmao.

Giorno Giovanna;

It’s gonna be super cute okay. Giorno in general might give the impression of knowing what he’s doing when it comes to romance, but he really is just winging it and kinda going ??? the entire time. Meanwhile, Gold Experience is going ham with SR, pulling all the stops to impress her (and you, by extension). His Stand makes flowers of a striking red color, trying to match the shade of SR’s ribbons!! Mostly poppies, tulips, and occasionally roses. 

Giorno is kinda curious how SR seems to be out a lot of the time, he’s thinking should I do the same thing with GE...? You’ll be doing exercises, and SR is there bringing a water bottle over to you. Or when you’re cooking, SR is hovering over your shoulder wanting to help out as well. She’s just almost always around, even if only in the background to explore her surroundings. It makes Giorno let GE out more often, subconsciously. 

He does ask you about it once, and you just kinda shrug and say SR likes the freedom to do as she pleases. Since she isn’t rambunctious like Pistols, you don’t see the harm in letting her roam around.  

Gold Experience wants to try making ribbons, but the best it can do is creating ribbon eels. It’s not quite the same, but it’s a solid effort. Giorno just has to stop GE from putting the ribbon eel on his head in the same way SR has a ribbon on hers. Mista was around to witness this historical event, and no, he does not intend on letting Giorno live it down. Giorno’s grateful he stopped it from actually happening though. 

Guido Mista;

Let’s just say your Stands together can be pretty chaotic. The first time you met Mista, and he realized you were a Stand user like himself, he had a very pressing question. When you showed him SR, he looked at it for a moment, as if in deep thought. 

“D-does... yours talk too?” 

Mista passed Polpo’s test only to be gifted talented, albeit troublesome little gremlins. Before he realized giving Pistols food is a reliable method of calming them down, it was a war zone. One of the mornings where the two of you had to do some standard protection fee collection, he looked like a borderline zombie. Lamenting that the Pistols refused to let him sleep, and asked if you’d please use SR to cover their mouths lmao. They were protesting the entire time, trying to convince you not to do it.

When Number Five starts crying, SR makes a little ribbon to put on his head!! It’s super cute and Mista’s heart is just leaping in his chest. Then, of course, all the other Pistols want one bc equal attention!! When the two of you aren’t paying solid attention to your Stands, you’ll sometimes spot SR testing how many accessories she can fit on the tiny Pistols. It isn’t a lot but they’re insistent on trying. 

Pistols are always trying to get SR to do crazy stunts for their entertainment. Eventually, you had to lock your refrigerator with her ribbons to prevent the Pistols from stealing your food. But when you’re busy, the Pistols keep trying to convince SR to undo them so they can snack. She actually felt bad for them once, released the restriction, and the Pistols went to town on your leftovers. : (

Mista felt pity for you though and offered to take you out to get more food!! So it all worked out for his benefit in the end. The Pistols do not take issue in reminding him of this as well, saying that they’re the reason he got to go on a date with you. :’ )

Pannacotta Fugo;

He remained fiercely adamant on keeping Purple Haze from you for the longest time. Fugo hates how his Stand practically comes out of its own autonomy whenever you’re in the vicinity, wanting to get a closer look at you. There have been a lot of close calls when you first got to know when another, leading to Fugo abruptly leaving in conversations. 

Your Stands get along well once Fugo feels comfortable enough to let Purple Haze out around you. Since SR is a long ranged Stand, she can do her cute ribbon tricks from a distance outside of the virus’ range!! Though she has a habit of trying to get closer, just out of curiosity. Fugo gets freaked out when this happens though, so she waits until he’s distracted with talking to you (a little genius)! 

Purple Haze makes the biggest puppy dog eyes at SR, which humiliates Fugo to no end. He gives his Stand intense talks when you’re not around, telling him to keep it cool, he doesn’t want you thinking he’s an idiot. But as soon as he even mentions SR, Purple Haze gets all thrilled and is like !!! So it’s ultimately counterproductive. Fugo just hopes you don’t put two and two together, over why his soul likes yours so much. It’s his daily prayer...

Fugo has an embarrassing habit of doodling ribbons on stuff he’s working on, when he starts zoning out. When he realizes what it is he’s doing he gets flustered about it, cursing underneath his breath and hoping that you don’t happen to come by and notice. Unfortunately for him, as SR likes to see what everyone is up to, she came over and saw what he was doing. After putting two and two together, she gave him a nod and a thumbs up on his doodles. Didn’t snitch to you though, so the two of them have a mutual understanding. :’)

Narancia Ghirga;

He wants so badly to impress you with Aerosmith. Narancia will whip his Stand out in your presence at any given opportunity, having it do a few flips and tricks more than necessary. Then he stares over to see what you and SR think about it... she once clapped in Aerosmith’s honor. It was all Narancia could think about for the rest of the day. 

The two Stands typically just play around with one another. Aerosmith likes to make little ribbon shaped clouds, and SR attempts making a plane shape out of her ribbons. It’s not quite the same, but she’s trying!! Narancia finds it adorable, and tries to make requests of shapes and stuff for her to make. SR does her best to fulfill the requests, concentrating hard on the task!!

Since SR enjoys making hair accessories, she’s tried to make a bandanna similar to Narancia’s for you. Though she ultimately scrapped the idea, giving you a disapproving look and fastening it back into the normal bow it normally is lmao. When you mentioned this behavior to Narancia he was like wait, what?? Lemme see! But if SR doesn’t find something fashionable, she doesn’t have any intention on doing it again. So he’s outta luck...

It doesn’t stop him from asking about it. He just can’t believe that your Stand thought about him when he wasn’t around!! It touched him in a way he never knew possible. It’s also a bit of a relief since you’re often the subject of his thoughts. 

Leone Abbacchio;

Similar in a sense to Fugo, where he didn’t want Moody Blues around you that much at first. He takes a much more serious approach to his Stand than others, since it’s deeply rooted in his past trauma. It’d actually be one of the few moments he might snap at you, should you ask to see his Stand one too many times. Not out of malicious intent, he’s just... very disillusioned with Moody Blues at first.

You two had a job which required some investigative work, the client having seemingly disappeared with some goods that belonged to Passione. Figuring out what happened with the merchandise was essentially child’s play for Moody Blues, a replay showing the full extent of the events. Abbacchio wasn’t keen on showing you his Stand, but it couldn’t be helped any longer.

Unlike the others who tended to pester him on the extent of Moody Blues’ abilities, you just complimented him. Saying that it’s similar in utility to your Stand. You willingly comparing yourself to him, and in a positive light nonetheless, kinda had him at a loss for words. 

He didn’t really offer a strong rebuttal like he normally would, so you assumed he didn’t think much of your comment. Which, of course, couldn’t be further from the truth. If you could see good in him of all people, then well... there was a lot for him to think about that night.

After this incident, he’s noticeably just a tad kinder to you in general. What you said meant a lot to him. Obviously not enough to make all his self deprecation go away overnight, but it just gave a small glimmer of hope. That maybe he can someday be better.

Trish Una;

Another person that I picture SR being especially adorable with!! After the events of Bruno betraying the boss, you and SR would be feeling hurt on Trish’s behalf. You instantly draw the parallels of living a carefree life, only for Passione/gangsters to come in and essentially ruin everything.

While dealing with the pain of rejection from her father figure, Trish also wonders if you consider her less important. Since your original job was to protect her, due to being the boss’ daughter, wouldn’t it make sense you don’t care about her now that it’s no longer your job to?

SR covers the spot where her hand was severed with a bow, even after Giorno properly heals it. Trish just looks at you confused, and you explain it’s your Stand’s way of wanting to help her feel better. That where her father had inflicted pain, Trish has the support and strength from you and herself to overcome it. 

Needless to say, Trish thinks highly over you, the feeling extending over to Spice Girl. During your meetups after everything is over, Spice Girl and Scarlet Ribbons come out and embrace one another!! Well, it’s more like SR goes for the hug, and Spice Girl is just :’) woah affection. Trish finds it a little embarrassing at first, but secretly loves and it and looks forward to it. Though she does wish Spice Girl was a tad more discreet. 

During Trish’s travels for her singing career, if there’s anything that even vaguely reminds her/Spice Girl of you, she snaps a photo to text to you. It’s mostly red hair accessories and clothing, which she of course purchases. Spice Girl misses SR a lot, so expect to receive a lot of texts asking how you and your Stand are doing. 

When Scarlet Ribbon spots Trish’s name popping up on your phone, she immediately brings it over. The Stand impatiently shoves your phone in your face, as if to say respond now!! It’s Trish, it’s important!! Scarlet Ribbons loves her a lot 🥺 especially since Trish sends her accessories...

[lilikags]

ೃ‧₊› a b o u t  t h i s  p o s t° ➮ Pairing: Miya Atsumu x reader ➮ Oneshot ➮ Tags: fluff ➮ Word Count: 2182

A/N: This is for @serowotonin​! [for Luna’s Valentines Day collab] Ik I said I was doing Atsumu bc “I was bored” but I always say “imagine being bored” and truly, I haven’t been bored for so long. I forgot that this was for the collab for a fat moment then when you saw the preview I was like, “Wait- no- it’s a surprise.” 

Premise: You and Atsumu are cleaning out the apartment, when you find a few letters you thought you would never see again… 

“Oi, (y/n), look at what I found,” you heard Atsumu say, leaning over the contents of a drawer he had been sifting through. 

“What?” you walked over to see what he had found. The two of you were cleaning out the apartment, as you were going to be moving out soon. Atsumu had a habit of keeping things that connected him to an important memory of his, unless he wanted to forget it- and this was one of them. You didn’t know he kept them- actually, it did make sense of him to, but you had simply forgotten about it and you somehow expected the same for him. You looked down to see what he had in his hands, and your face literally went emotionless as you saw the letter in his hands. 

You really didn’t mind the letters, for the most part. Actually, they held dear to you. However, that first one… you were grateful for it, but you also remembered just how bad you wanted to buy a grave space and bury it for eternity back then... 

Miya Atsumu.

This was a dare. This is a love letter. For Valentines. Happy valentines day. If you have extra chocolate, send me some. 

Sincerest thanks, (y/n). 

Atsumu usually threw away the letters he received every Valentines. It wasn’t that he was trying to be rude; it was just that there were too many letters for him to read (and reply to), so he usually just threw them out. Osamu often teased him for this; he boasted that he at least read his letters.

“Oi, ‘Samu, look at this one,” Atsumu called out to his brother. 

“What?” Osamu looked at him, with a face of disbelief. “Yer actually lookin’ at them?”

“Nah, not really, but this one’s hilarious,” Atsumu laughed. 

“Okay, not funny, keep yer lame humor to yourself.” 

----------------

“(y/n), truth or dare,” (b/f/n) asked. 

You smiled, “Dare.” 

“Hmmm… alright, send a love letter to Miya Atsumu- it has to be at least one line long.”

“I’m- okay then.” 

You brought out a piece of paper, wrote the first things that came to mind, and once you reached one line, you stopped. You folded the paper and grabbed whatever envelope you could find and sealed it with tape. The dare required actually giving the letter, much to your dismay, but it wasn’t like you could back down from a dare. After all, it was (b/f/n), and the nonstop teasing would definitely occur if you failed to complete the dare. 

Dearest (y/n), 

I did in fact receive your rather interesting letter, and I have decided to bring you some chocolate as you wished. I wish you, as well, a very happy valentine’s day this year.

Most sincerely, Atsumu. 

Atsumu was intrigued enough to write a reply; in fact, he decided to write in the most formal way possible. He knew from the letter that you were either a tsundere or someone who was actually dared to do so, and decided that it would be fun entertainment for the both of you. 

When you received the letter, you were surprised to see a reply. It was known he didn’t send out replies, yet you had received one. As you read it, you felt a need to reply; you’d simply feel bad if you didn’t. However, what was there to talk about? How the chocolates were good? He had stuck it on your first period desk, out in the open. And you also sincerely wondered what was with the overly formal tone. You do remember writing the most shitty letter you’ve ever written to him, and that volleyball-obsessed dude just writes something formal to you? Baffles the mind.

Well, then, if he was going to reply, you would too. 

Miya Atsumu,

Thanks for the chocolate- your fans make pretty good chocolate, I have to say. Bet I could make better chocolate than ya, ‘cause all ya focus on is just volleyball. Anyways, what was with the overly formal tone- ya like me or somethin’? Would be funny if ya did and I turned ya down. XD  

(y/n) 

You never really thought of Miya Atsumu, but this really sparked your interest. It was amusing, his reactions. It was definitely something you didn’t expect- you actually didn’t expect a reply at all. The reply you received was definitely out of the ordinary as well, one you never thought a hotshot volleyball player would write. It seemed he was interested in you in some ways- and you as well. 

(y/n),

Pfffft, you think I might like ya? I just thought yer letter was interestin’, that’s all. Ya really think I can’t make chocolate? Bet I could make better chocolate than ya, I’ll show you. I make you chocolate myself and we’ll see how it tastes. Just you watch, I’ll make ya say I make the best chocolate ever! 

Atsumu. 

You saw that in your shoe locker the next morning- and everyone saw it. You were beginning to regret actually replying to him, but there was no backing out now. (b/f/n) really hit the goal here, for her. People were probably talking about it. It’s always some event that involves romance that catches everyone’s eye. And since it was just after valentine’s, everyone would automatically assume it was a love letter. In reality, it was simply a little bit of playful banter. 

You wondered if people actually knew who it was. You hoped not; it would gather way too much attention for your liking. You’d have an entire fanclub after you, and it was definitely (b/f/n)’s fault that you got into this entire mess. You had absolutely no idea if anyone saw him slip that into your shoe locker, since it had probably been there for a good hour or so before you and most of the other students got there. In any case, there was nothing you could do about people knowing things they already know, so you headed onto class. It was exam week, and you sighed; it would be a long day. 

When you arrived at homeroom, you were not-so-pleasantly surprised with what you found at your desk. You just wanted a quiet day; go to school, take the tests, and get out so you could relax at home. But no, you just had to see this and you knew there was a thing called rumors you had to deal with. Well, you could just be like “whatever” and not care, but you definitely knew who’d be after you, for real. Atsumu’s fanbase was quite scary, and definitely large- a group of people one would regret messing with. 

“Ugh- what am I going to do with this chocolate now, he gave me a lot yesterday…” 

“(y/n)! Oiiii, you got chocolate?! From who from who-”

“(b/f/n), if you say a word, you are going to be dead to me.”

“...” she looked away, but then turned to you again and whispered in your ear. “So, Miya Atsumu, who has a fanbase, likes you.” 

“I’m- no-”

“But what I’m seeing says otherwise?”

“Ugh, you’re coming to my house and you are going to pay for that dare.” 

“Oh ho ho, seems like I started something…” “Bet you did.”

Pisshead Atsumu

LMAO bet ya didn’t make the chocolate, yer terrible at lying <///3 seen this chocolate before. And like wtf you put a box of chocolate on my desk with YOUR NAME on it. Ya know that people will do a thing called assuming things, right? Smh, think before you act. Anyways, I’m counting on ya to fix up this mess.

(y/n)

When you finished class, the first thing you did was write the note. You were absolutely paranoid with this mess, and you were going to have Atsumu fix it. Yes, you did technically initiate contact first, but that was (b/f/n)’s fault and this could’ve avoided this if he hadn’t pulled off a whole stunt. 

It was already around 6 when he saw the note. A small smirk filled his expression, he was so sure that he would be able to get a good reaction out of (y/n). It was written on scrap paper, the back of a phys. ed worksheet. You wrote it in a rush, very obviously. That wasn’t really what caught his attention though; he was puzzled as to how he would fix this. Tell his fans to fuck off? Osamu would tease him for eternity.

“Oi, what’cha starin’ at?” he heard Osamu nag. “Mom’s waitin’ for us for dinner.”

“Hey, ‘Samu…  ya know how to fix this?” 

“... ARE YOU AN IDIOT- YOU ARE AN IDIOT.”

“I AM NOT! YOU ARE THE IDIOT HERE!” 

“SAYS THE ONE WHO GOT INTO A MESS LIKE THIS!” 

“Oi, ya shouldn’t be fightin’ at this hour,” the two heard Kita say, as he gave them a certain look. “... ‘m sorry…” the twins apologized.

Even after a fulfilling dinner made by their mother and a nice, hot shower, Atsumu still couldn’t think of a solution. Osamu almost snitched on him, but he decided that there was enough on their mom’s plate of problems at the moment. 

“What if ya said you were dating?” Osamu offered. 

“HAH?! ARE YA INSANE?!” Atsumu yelled at him.

“That would explain what happened at valentine’s.” 

“But there’s nothin’ between us-”

“Yer fanclub wouldn’t really believe anythin’ else.”

“Yeah…” 

(y/n),

Can we meet when practice ends at 6 on Thursday?

M. Atsumu.

“... I’m- Is he just going to apologize then run away? Tch.” you sighed. You had the idea that Miya Atsumu was overconfident and carefree, but not to this extent. The least he could do was fix this- he had power over his fandom and what people said about him, unlike you. You had to go, it wasn’t like you really had much of a choice if you wanted to talk it out and fix it. 

“Hey, (y/n) are you and Atsumu dating?” one of your classmates asked, and a bunch of others hovered around the table, waiting to hear a response. (b/f/n) had told you rumors had spread around the entire school; you figured that would’ve happened. Any topic related to the twins spread like wildfire, especially the blonde-haired one. 

“... Can you not try to pry into my private life?” you replied, which you instantly realized was exactly a wrong answer to give. This implied that you were in fact dating Atsumu secretly, and you just made your life 10x worse. You figured you should just tell everyone what had happened, then the blame would be on (b/f/n)- it should preferably be placed on Atsumu, since he started it, really. 

When you met him at 6pm, you expected no contribution from him. Instead, you were met with a solid plan for something you weren’t really happy about, but it seemed the easiest to convince the public of a story they put out. 

“(y/n)... let’s tell them that we’re dating.”

“Hmm… well, they already think that…”

“I’m sorry… I wasn’t thinking…” “It’s fine. All we can do is move forward, I guess.”

“Yeah… ‘Samu gave me this solution; it’s all I have, I’m sorry if it’s-”

“It’s fine. Let’s go through with it. Just protect me from the crazy fangirls; that’s all I want.”

“Ya.” 

“And we’ll need to put together a coherent story; what’s yer number?” 

“Ahaha, seriously, maybe (b/f/n)’s a prophet. She told me that she was aiming for somethin’ to happen between us,” you commented, remembering what happened years and years ago. 

“Ya were just so unnecessarily worried about the fangirls,” Atsumu mentioned. 

“Oi! Yer fangirls were hella scary back then…” 

That night, you stayed up coming up with a story, which ended with the two of you breaking up so that you could go on your separate ways again. However, the story didn’t last too long, as (b/f/n)’s parent’s investigations went a little too far and spread the truth a little too much. (b/f/n) is one thing, but you had almost forgotten her parents were another, seriously. They’d been a little busy over the last few years, thus the lack of investigations of local drama, but they had been doing so for decades, what could you expect from them? 

Nothing was Atsumu’s fault to the fanclub, unless he seriously convinced them that it was. You were guilty until proven innocent. Unbeknownst to you until after, he gave them a whole (to be honest, not-so-great) speech on how he kind of went too far with the joke, but also placed the blame on everyone else for assuming things. People were absolutely ridiculous; their ideas and their insane imagination should learn that the left side of the brain exists too. 

“Funny how we met again after college, after all that time.”

“Ya… a real wonder” 

Another A/N: OMG THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING FOR ‘TSUMU FORGIVE ME IF I WROTE HIM LIKE, WRONG IN THIS AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

『••✎••』 Extra Info * ˚ ✦ ⇢ If you would like to read some of my other works, find them here! * ˚ ✦ ⇢ Taglist: @serowotonin​ @luna-la-ley​ // send me an ask if you would like to be added!

[vellichor-virgo]

no longer canon tag game!

@chaotic-queer-disaster tagged me in this very cool tag forever ago, but i could only think of like one thing that i axed from ND canon. i went through some of my old notes today and found some more stuff, so here you go!

the world of ND was initially meant to include greek mythology. the goddesses Artemis, Nyx, and Selene were given special importance (and eventually combined to influence the creation of Naeva, the most prominent deity in my own mythology i eventually came up with)

back when all the other characters were just vague ideas in my head, the romance part of ND was supposed to be a love triangle between Celena, the prince character (who would become Aedan), and the “other guy” (who would become Pollux). this was back in like 2015, where every single YA fantasy novel involved a love triangle, so 13-year-old me thought that that was Simply The Rule. except i couldn’t figure out which of the boys i actually wanted Celena to end up with (spoiler: it was neither of them, but i didn’t realize that) so i ended up scrapping the idea. now Celena gets a very complicated, angsty rivals-to-lovers-to-enemies wlw romance, and Aedan and Pollux end up with each other. yay!

Pollux was supposed to have fire powers at some point! I have no idea how, or why, other than the fact that I guess I thought it would be cool.

In a similar vein, Maia was supposed to have faerie heritage, which came with magic and possibly wings.

Ironically enough, Iliana was actually not initially intended to have powers. That honestly came about completely randomly and accidentally ended up being a MAJOR plotline of the story.

Aedan used to have a lover who was sent away from the palace by his parents, who didn't approve of their relationship, and was subsequently murdered. This was supposed to be the explanation for why Aedan is so withdrawn and guarded. The main reason for this was actually bc I told someone I'd write their OC into the story somehow, but I felt that it didn't align with Aedan's character.

Maia's last name used to be Ahearn. Ahearn is an Irish surname (Serranis has a lot of Irish influences), but Maia is from Irona, which is based on east Asia. So I decided to change it to Aimoto (a Japanese surname) to better reflect her heritage.

i'm sure there's much, much more, since ND has been in the works for the last 6 years and i've basically been writing it while growing up and trying to figure out how to actually create a story. so it's changed a ton from the initial idea I had for it (and i'm sure will change much more in the future). but those are some of the main ones!

i will tag @ashen-crest @akindofmagictoo @sleepyowlwrites @solipsism-lemonade and @cream-and-tea !

[levis-little-nuggie]

pspspps hey babes!!! i promise i'm working on your request byt i write slow sjdkfhksajhdf, but lemme send you a request in exchange!! “You’re competitive and so am I, and it’s going to lead to a fight.” with either Satan or Mammon, NSFW 👀, and pronouns are they/them :))) thank you love you bby

@gatchagay MAARRRSSSS 💜💜💜💜 I had so much fun writing this!! So initially this was going to bed angsty and then fluffy but then I saw the NSFW and had to scrap that idea bc then it'd be SUPER LONG but I'm really happy with how this turned out and I hope you do too!!

Without further ado, here's prompt 72 (that rhymes 😂) oh! And the prompt list can be found here

Warnings: smut! 2nd person Reader POV, Mammon dirty talking, slight choking, skin biting but no mentions of blood 💜💜

72. "You’re competitive and so am I, and it’s going to lead to a fight" NSFW with Mammon

"Oh man did ya see the way my smile shines on the RAD newsletter cover?" Mammon's ego had been particularly stroked today since the aforementioned newsletter hit the stands at RAD. His face seemed to follow you everywhere and he was adamant at making sure you knew.

"Careful there tiger, you're starting to sound like Asmo." You teased and flipped the page to read the next article. The both of you were lounging around in one of the student study rooms that were littered around the campus waiting for your next class to start.

"I'm serious Y/N! The pictures from that shoot are some of my best yet!" Your eye twitched in irritation. He'd been droning on like this for hours and was currently plucking away at your last strands of patience.

"Mammon," you closed the magazine and placed it down on the table, turning in your seat to face him. "Yes, the pictures turned out excellent but do you think maybe they used a form of editing software to touch up the shots? Like editing the lighting and smoothing out the colors?" He frowned and you felt your heart twinge a bit from the blunt question. And then he pouted and you held back a snort.

"Oi you're just jealous you don't get paid to have your pictures taken. Modeling, it's a tough job! Ya gotta know how to pose for the camera." You resisted the temptation to roll your eyes. Picking the magazine back up, you resumed your reclined position by kicking your legs back up to rest on the chair next to you.

"I bet it's not even that hard," you started, "why, I bet that anything you can do, I can do better. I can do anything better than you." The words rolled off your tongue but more as a playful tease, lyrics from a song you'd heard awhile ago, words not to be taken seriously. But the mood in the room shifted, your mouth suddenly felt dry. You heard him shift in his seat, the soft clatter as he placed his sunglasses on the table seemed to echo.

"No you can't," he responded in a somewhat menacing retort but,

"Yes I can," you couldn't help but answer back like you'd heard in the song.

"No you can't," his voice was getting louder but not because he was raising his voice, no, he was leaning over the table trying to catch your attention.

"Yes I can," but your eyes were wide, glued to the page in front of you. The newsletter was getting stuck to your warmed palms and you licked your lips.

"No you can't," if you'd looked, you would have seen his lips curl in a snarl. How dare you, a human, think themselves better than The Great Mammon. He already had to deal with his brothers thinking they were better than him, there was no way he'd let a human think so too.

"Yes I can, yes I can." The last part of your response came out barely louder than a whisper as a shadow crossed over your magazine. You swallowed a lump in your throat as you lifted your head, craning your neck back to see Mammon's face looming over yours. You shrunk down in your seat and laughed nervously, sending him a sheepish smile.

In an instant, Mammon was holding you up against a wall, his hand around your throat and knee pressed in between your legs helping to hold you up. He laughed as your nails dug into his hand but he pulled back slightly and your lungs filled back up with air. The pupils of his eyes were narrowing, his fangs elongating, the smile on his lips anything but innocent.

"Anything you can be, I'm already greater. Try as you might, I'm greater than you." His chest rumbled as a growl interlaced with his words. You wanted to laugh at the irony that his words matched the song lyrics but the claws around your neck and the pupils staring into your soul quelled the amusement you'd found in this situation.

He hummed in thought as his face inched closer to yours, his eyes looking down at you with his height advantage and pressed his leg harder against your groin. Your eyes fluttered closed as he lowered his face to press his nose against the skin under your ear, listening to your blood pulse in your veins. You mewled, rolling your hips against his thigh as his hot tongue lapped at your skin.

"You're competitive," you admitted, licking your lips, "and so am I and it's going to lead to a fight." You flicked your eyes back to his and pleaded, "I don't want to fight with you Mammon." His fangs bit into your skin, effectively cutting you off with a yelp.

"You shoulda thought about that before challenging The Great Mammon and now I want to hear you say it."

"Say what?"

"Tell me I'm the greatest there is." Of course that's what he'd ask of you.

"...you're the greatest there is." The bratty side of you wanting to fight back but your logical side yelled that this wasn't the time for that so you conceded.

"Mmm," he paused in thought. "Tell me that I, the Great Mammon, am the greatest at fuckin you." His hand tightened around your neck and his other hand undid the clasp of your trousers and shot down past your underwear and started rubbing you, working your sex along with his thigh.

His mouth crashed into yours, shoving his tongue past your lips as his fingers picked up their pace rubbing against you, your slick coating his fingers making your toes curl from the pleasure. Your hands flew to his own pants as you fumbled trying to undo his. Mammon pulled back to laugh and you whined from the loss of heat but cried out as he tore off your pants and hoisted you up, your back thumped against the wall. His nails digging into your thighs urged you to wrap your legs around his waist and he pushed up your uniform to tug and pinch your nipples. He shoved his fingers into your mouth and you moaned tasting yourself on his skin and lapped at the digits obediently.

"There ya go Y/N, get em all nice and wet for me, cause I know how to fuck you." His words cascaded like waves over your arousal, you clenched your thighs in response and he laughed against your neck. Pulling his fingers out, he reached down and started working to stretch you out. It was rough and it stung but he soon started curling his fingers inside you, abusing that spot that had you panting and writhing against him, begging for more.

"Ya gotta say it Y/N," a shit-eating grin plastered on his face as he teased your entrance with the tip of his cock. Your mind in a lust-induced fog struggled to recall what he was asking for. He only laughed at your confusion.

"Ya gotta tell me," he pushed the tip of his cock into you and kept it there, "that the Great Mammon is the greatest at fucking you." You groaned in frustration as he held your hips in place preventing you from moving at all.

Making a show of it, you ran your tongue over your lips and looked up at Mammon with hooded eyelids and cried out, knowing full well he liked it when you got loud with him. "The Great Mammon is the hng, greatest at, ahh, fucking me." The demon purred as he sheathed the rest of himself inside you, his teeth biting your shoulder and growled against your skin. Your body felt like it was on fire, the pain and sheer ecstasy from the penetrations mixing together forcing you to cry out.

"You, ahh, take my cock so, mnnn, well Y/N," Mammon groaned as he waited for you to adjust to him, his tongue lapping at the blood that pooled from his bite. He kissed his way of your neck along your jaw, the corner of your mouth, and finally on your lips. It was his way of being sweet while waiting for you to adjust. Your grip on his arms loosened as the tip of his cock brushed against that spot inside you again and you moaned, rolling your hips to feel it again.

"You're ready, ha, so soon huh?" He laughed, pulling himself out to the tip and thrusted back in again, his eyes rolling back as he started out with a pace slow enough for you to get comfortable. "You're such a, fuck, needy human, practically, ngh, begging for me to fffuck ya." Your eyes cut to his in a glare, a retort on your tongue dying as he snapped his hips into yours.

"You're so, ha, fuckin tight, grippin me an shit, fuck, so hot," curses intertwined with his moans as he picked up the pace, fucking you into the wall. Your hips tried to keep up but the pace was too fast, too hot. Your mouth hung open, moaning and strewing curses as he rammed into that spot over and over again, stars dancing across your vision.

His hand moved to touch you, stimulating your sex as he kept his deliriously fast pace. The fact that you were both in a study room at RAD was the furthest from your mind as he fucked you into oblivion. You didn't even feel the drool running down your chin much less the door opening and slamming shut.

"Pl-nngghhh, please do-haaa- don't stop, Ma, fuuuck, Mammon" your words garbled but your walls pulsating around him told him you were close.

"Fuck, you're gonna cum for me baby," his voice was higher, his pace becoming erratic as his fingers dug into your hips, moving you against his thrusting. Pulling you away from the wall, he angled your hips back just slightly and hammered away.

Your voice barely choked out that you were cumming but your legs locked in place, your mouth open in a silent scream as the tightly wound coil snapped, your walls convulsing around his cock as he fucked you through your orgasm. His nails dug into your back, holding you close to him as his hips slowed their pace, bucking deep into you as he came. The heat of his seed spread through you and you both rode through your after-glow, bodies twitching as feeling came back to your limbs.

Mammon pressed his body into yours back up against the wall, using it to hold both of you up as you both fought to catch your breath. You exchanged lazy kisses and he pulled out of you and he pulled a small towel out of his jacket pocket. He laughed at your arched brow.

"I always gotta be prepared with you around," you snorted a laugh, he kissed your cheek, and you stuck your tongue out at him.

"'S not my fault," you were cut off by a yawn and Mammon bent to wipe you and himself clean with the towel before chucking it in the trash. "The Great Mammon is the greatest at fucking me." You laughed heartily as his cheeks flushed, reverting back to his tsundere demeanor.

Pulling your pants back up, you smiled and waited for him to sit back down before plopping into his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck. Mammon laced his arms around you and nestled his head on your chin, looking over your shoulder as you pulled out your DDD to catch up on notifications. You both flushed a deep red when you saw a message from Lucifer, a picture of your earlier activities embedded within the message accompanied by the words:

"Since you both seem to be all caught up with your school work, please stop by my office for additional assignments. This is not a request."

You sprang up from his lap, wincing as the sting coursed through you. Mammon slapped your ass and bent over, offering you a piggy back ride as an apology. Securing your arms around his neck, you both made your way back to the House of Lamentation talking about what punishments the eldest had in mind for you both but eventually talked about promises for more rounds to come later that day.

[timelesslords]

⭐!!!

Aaaah okay so!! If it’s my pick I’m going to talk about some of the stuff I changed in the last 3 chapters of UFS when I rewrote them & why I changed them

Originally, Percy never caused an earthquake in the cavern, and the explosion was just attributed to Hazel breaking through the ceiling. But I figured the timing of that was slightly too dramatic and perfect and Percy causing an earthquake was sexier anyway so I changed it lmao

In the original confession chapter, Jason wasn’t even present for the conversation. I had Annabeth wake up in the middle of the day instead of the middle of the night and Jason was away. But it felt incomplete to have Jason’s goodbye be from the boat all that time ago since he’s Annabeth’s oldest friend, so I changed the timing added him back in for part of it. The hardest part of writing that scene and why I didn’t include Jason originally was the initial confrontation— I just had no idea what they would say to each other. After I realized everyone would just start crying it got a lot easier lol

In the original convo with Piper the idea that Piper didn’t trust Annabeth’s judgement about Percy bc she found him attractive was never addressed. It was actually y’all’s reaction to that scene and seeing how much that moment bothered people that made me change it! Originally I didn’t think it was needed since it was just Annabeth making an (incorrect) assumption, and Piper never actually *says* anything to that affect, but after seeing how much people disliked the moment anyway I realized I had to address it

Chapter 33 (smutty chapter right before the epilogue) originally never even existed lol. When I added the extra chapter way back around chapter 12 it was originally intended to be roots (the chapter where they have the Luke conversation) split in two, with a little smutty scene at the beginning 👀 But I felt like that was a little unrealistic in terms of not getting caught and I didn’t love how the scene turned out anyway so I moved the sexy stuff to the end hahah.

Some of chapter 33 was salvaged from that chapter I scrapped though lol. The one I cut was going to be called “fire” so it would be a parallel to “ice” two chapters later when Annabeth falls in the ocean and they’re still kind of fighting. Alas it did not work out 😪 but that’s why ice is called ice lol

Send me a scene/chapter/something I wrote and I’ll explain my thought process behind it! Send a ⭐️ and I’ll pick something I want to talk about :)

[septiceyeliner]

hi i just saw ur hw book cover and i would like to see ur sketches/time lapse/thought process bc i love it

Okay so this is going to be really long but

For those who just want to see a time lapse which includes most everything, here’s the one from procreate! Unfortunately my laptop stopped recording when I switched over to illustrator, but the layout didn’t really change that much in the end!

Warning for quick flashing images!

Here’s all the different versions side by side:

More in depth ramble about my thoughts and process down below! This is mostly about the process since there’s no hidden meanings or symbolism this time around!

I put together a sorta of inspo board this time around including the images I wanted to use!

My initial idea was to incorporate the colors from the hw/dreamland album art into the piece! I wanted to make it look surreal with those colors, but at the same time look soft and aesthetically pleasing. I achieved none of this.

I started out by sketching and writing down things I associated with heat waves. As a minimum I do three loose thumbnails. This time I did ten and chose three to try out. The first one I tried was the one that vaguely looked like a human with jellyfish behind them. I ended up going with it because while changing the colors of the figure I accidentally discovered this cool coloring effect.

I messed around with colors and different blending layers a lot in this graphic! I used exclusion a lot for the jellyfish and did a few layers with different colors. Ended up trying many many backgrounds... I moved on to working on the typography to see if that would help me on settling with a background. (Hence why there are a few different versions) (also at that point I had switched over to illustrator)

I reaaaaaallly struggled with making the front look not so empty. I knew I wanted the quotes on the back with the summary, but the front was just looking absolutely lackluster to me because...

Well you know how most of the time authors have their full names on the cover?

So I’m going to say this but I mean it in the most lighthearted way possible

@heytherestilinski trying to make your username “tbhyourelame” look nice and not awkward on the cover almost drove me to tears 😭

It’s because having the username all alone made it look like a wattpad cover to me

I tried switching to just having “Dakota” alone (but nope it was still too empty). Then I tried adding your username after as a last name but it didn’t look great either.

I think I came this 👌🏽 close to asking you for a fake last nameto add, but I didn’t want to a) sound creepy b) spoil the graphic.

Anyways, at some point I said to my friend, “my goal is “would you pick this up if you saw it at a book store?” and so far the answer is no”

Then I remembered I had actual books, with covers I could reference!! (I am slow sometimes) That’s where I got the idea to do the tag line “New York times best seller” to help fill out the negative space towards the top.

Ended up changing it to “ao3 most read” (even though it isn’t the #1 most read but it is one of the most read fics) just cause I didn’t want to possibly confuse people.

There was lot of jumping back and forth especially towards the end where you see the colors completely change. You can’t tell in the time lapse, but by that point (when I changed the colors) I had worked on it for three days, gave up on day four, considered scrapping it completely on day five, and picked it up again on day six. I think my tracked time on procreate was four hours on the main cover. I have no clue how long I sketched for(the sun was still out when I started and it was pitch black by the end), and god knows how long I spent between illustrator and indesign trying to figure out how to make it a spread!

This graphic taught me a lot of things, but most importantly it taught me to take a step back and take breaks. Because when I felt like absolutely trashing all the work I put in after not touching it for a day. I came back and I actually figured out how to make it work again!

To be honest I was so hard on myself for no reason. You guys really liked it and have said so many nice things that made me realize I was being way too hard on myself. Thank you it means a lot!!

if you made it to the end congrats! Please let me know if this was insightful at all!

[serenedash]

I started rambling about my experience with kh and then it turned into khux and then it just turned into me rambling about Ryou and my art journey????? enjoy I guess,

it’s very long but there’s art in there :)

It’s funny to think about my kh journey as a whole tbh, I grew up watching my mom play video games, which included kh1 and 2. I wasn’t allowed to play the playstation2 we owned BUT I did have a gameboy so the first game I played was CoM (after my mom finished it ofc,) so I guess you could say I’ve always been passionate about kh “””side games””” lmao but I did fall off of kh very quickly bc again, I wasn’t allowed to play our PS2 and also I Am A Terrible Gamer I’ve Never Finished CoM I’m sorry you all had to find out like this, but then 358/2 came out when I was in middle school and!!! I didn’t care and I didn’t play idk why lol

Anyway, fast forward to high school I’m like 15 and my older sister, who HAS been keeping up with kh, has a wallpaper on her phone of roxas and ventus. And bc I haven’t kept up I say “nice roxas wallpaper” and she says “thanks but it’s roxas and ventus” and I proceeded to get so mad that I was determined to prove to her that her wallpaper was just roxas twice and then I fell down the BBS rabbit hole and suddenly I was reading about vanitas and then I’m reading the fan translations of the BBS novel and I’m crying??? I am sobbing???? and that’s how I actually got into kh for real lol we are vanitas stans before we are people,

It’s so funny how I thought I was some kh super fan, knowing all this stuff that I spent so long reading and rewatching cutscene movies, but I never once, SOMEHOW NEVER ever came across khx. It’s so absurd and bizarre I seriously have no idea how I never once encountered khx prior to khux. I suppose that has to do with the fact I wasn’t involved in the fandom? In early high school I had stepped away from fandoms as a whole and I didn’t have any interest in really posting content or interacting with fans anymore bc of how burnt out I was from a previous fandom,

but khux released! and I was so hype and excited for it! on launch day I was a senior in high school, I had ran around to every “nerd” and weeb I could find in school to ask them to join my party and fun fact about me is I have crippling social anxiety I literally refuse to start conversations irl so holy shit I was OUT HERE doing the MOST

My player just originally had my name (Matt) but everyone in my party had fun names so Ryou was born! High school was one big yugioh phase for me and ryou bakura is one of my favorite characters ever so it was just the logical name choice lol I quickly started creating Ryou, the character, as well. I was also leaving my homestuck phase and that + vanitas obsession made This character design (art circa 2016)

If y’all are familiar with my kh oc’s you might notice that keyblade now belongs to my kid Monty LOL

Anyway that got scrapped quickly for the chip and dale outfit (which is where Ryou’s trademark goggles are from <3) Goggles have been a staple of my character designs for a LONG TIME so like, it had to be done, (that’s a separate ramble about a separate oc tho)

OG Ryou was an interesting guy; he was a young party leader with this overwhelming responsibility on his shoulders bc of his status as a party leader. In his original story, he also struggled heavily with darkness, much like Terra but for Ryou it was more that the darkness was controlling him and not like a source of power like it was for Terra

A big part of early Ryou I kept, however, was the crushing awareness of loss. One of my party members (the strongest one at the time,) had left without saying a word and I was very confused and hurt. This was around the time the ephemera plot was happening so I decided to incorporate it into Ryou’s story; having him experience losing a friend to darkness since it’s so normal for wielders in Daybreak Town to just disappear, and this would unintentionally become a theme for both me and Ryou as khux friends would just randomly disappear.

I was desperate for khux at this point and I decided to watch the fan translations for khx and GOD, god, was I obsessed. I couldn’t stop thinking about the foretellers. And I’m not going off about that here bc I already did that, but I actually started entering fandom again! I did it slowly, I started on tumblr before this blog was made altho it was me sending anons to the few khux related blogs I could have lol a friend convinced me to get twitter where I got involved with the ffxv fandom, which led me to the kh fandom and eventually the khux fandom there which is what REALLY got me going on khux.

I joined discord servers, most of the servers I’m in are khux related, and from there I joined the khux oc rp (shout out to anyone there who might be reading this lol here’s some art from the beginning of the rp,)

It’s SO FUNNY how the RP influenced me so heavily. I hadn’t RP’d in YEARS, I used to have a strict no oc rp policy, but here I was? And the funny part is, I had barely developed Ryou. I had scrapped his original story and all I had was POST WAR Ryou so I literally had to reverse write him; I had only ever written him as a depressed, guilt ridden adult, but it was a fucking blast and I have such fond memories of this rp when it was active,

But anyway, this encouraged me to get more serious about art! I started drawing, writing, cosplaying, and roleplaying when I hadn’t done any of that stuff in a very long time. The first time I ever drew a background was for a deviant art khux competition actually LOL

also! I always think extremely fondly of the drawing I did of Aced in the keyblade war. It was also one of the first backgrounds I ever drew and it felt like my real starting point in the khux fandom. It got a ton of notes on here and someone wrote a tiny fic in a reblog which just made me SO HAPPY like it really felt like people were noticing me :) I was going to draw a matching Ira but!! I just never did!! One day tho, it’s on my art bucket list to redraw this along with Ira,

Aside from my personal growth, khux was great for my social life ngl, I made SO MANY friends online and got to meet a ton of people irl over the years! It’s crazy to think about all the people I now know and talk to? It honestly makes me really emotional. I’ll never forget taking the train into NYC and meeting up with discord friends. Going to conventions and talking with people about the latest khux update? Absolutely insane and those were some GOOD TIMES, if I thanked every khux friend or even just person who made an impact on me then we’d be here for a LONG TIME,

Fun fact, for my Lauriam cosplay all I needed to buy was the wig I just owned his outfit LOL also? Probably retiring that cosplay ngl people treated me like absolute garbage when I wore him and it led to a lot of confidence issues for awhile ngl. That’s probably one of the only memorable negative experiences I have with khux; it was great when khux people recognized me but for kh fans that weren’t in khux? They were FUCKING MEAN??? fuck kh fandom at large, I only care about khux fandom,

This leads me to another huge part of my experience in khux fandom: THEORIES!! I used to write SO MANY and oh my god my brain was so full all the time. It was a huge appeal for me in the fandom; I had been previously writing theory posts in the RWBY fandom and it just migrated over to khux for me lol I had done a ton of theorizing around Lauriam tbh, it was really the only reason I liked his character at all bc initially I did not care about the dandelions, anyone who wasn’t Skuld I was like “please leave Now thanks”

A funny part of khux fandom I never intended to be apart of is the MEMES, I really only started doing memes as stress relief bc college had me so busy all I had time/energy for was these quick little shit post drawings.

The first meme I made, file name “invi despair” LOL we need to get her a girlfriend smh anyway, I think in my senior year of college I did a bunch of rapid fire memes all in one month bc the stress of finals was getting so bad afdgfhdgf as far as I know my impact on this fandom will be my memes bc all I do now is enter a kh/khux server and introduce myself and I go “yeah I draw art. here’s a meme” and everyone goes OH YOU, honestly I am nothing if not a clown

I’ve talked so much idk where I’m going with this. Khux is just a good game even if the gameplay actually kind of really sucks yknow lol but it was the first game I played where I like, REALLY got into the meta and the mechanics. I used to read so much on the mechanics and watch youtube videos on which medals were worth pulling for. I was never a whale or a top player exactly, but I could rank well if I tried lol I’ve made it to the top 100 for solo rankings, my party has made it to top 10, and in pvp I’ve made top 300. I’m not the highest level in my party but FUCK do I know how to manipulate this game LOL

And with all that hard work, the strategies, the theorizing, the content I’ve made-- it’s been my life for 5 years. I’ve logged into khux almost every single day. At the end, I have logged 1820 days in khux out of 1910 days. Kinda crazy. Crazier I’ve never spent money on khux either lol the only “money” gone into it was one time my mom gave me a google play store gift card and I used it on my birthday for a VIP xemnas medal which eventually made it to regular pulls anyway but it was nice and a little treat :)

I’m not a gacha fan, I don’t care for it, so I don’t think I’ll be touching another gacha again. But for kh? This was pretty fucking awesome, even if it sucked a lot sometimes LOL It was worth it for the people I’ve met most of all I think. I would honestly be a completely different person without khux and that’s REALLY insane to think about.

[kindahoping4forever]

Directors cut thing for watch me bloom🥰

I'm honestly surprised and delighted you requested this one, idk why I've always been so self-conscious about it and always convince myself I was the main person that liked it 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

The skeleton of Watch Me Bloom, supporting Ash during the creation and release of Superbloom, started percolating in the week or so leading up to the album's release. I just kept thinking how happy, carefree and at peace Ash seemed and how it was such a stark but welcome contrast to the CALM release, which was fun and exciting but also overall kind of a weird vibe due to the scrapped promo, the issues with Billboard and the beginning of the pandemic.

(Continued under a cut because this fic was RIFE with complications so I ramble for a long time lmao sorry, y'all should not have told me you like long answers 🤓)

Director’s Cut Fic Ask Game (AMA, let’s talk the stories behind the stories!)

@cal-puddies and I wrote a fic about the CALM chaos called Release and I thought a fic about the Superbloom experience would be a cool juxtaposition. (I originally thought WMB might be good as a sequel to Release but it ended up just not feeling like the same couple so I pivoted to just having the stories be companions in theme and structure)

I kept the idea in the back of my mind until the night of the Superbloom livestream: when Ash revealed he went on a desert getaway to celebrate, I knew I wanted to write that and when he sparked that joint at the end of the stream, I knew I had to write it 😂🤡 I came up with the individual vignettes a few days later. (You'll notice it's basically what I ended up writing with one small change which I'll get to in a second) 🤓

The first chapter now takes place late night in Ash's studio but it started out as a middle of the night "can't sleep" smut scene, with Ash coming to bed late after being in the studio but unable to turn his mind off to rest and his girl helps him relax (😏). I showed the section to Cass and she was a TRUE friend and collaborator and said it was good but pretty standard fare and I could do better. So I shifted focus to the home studio, which I hadn't seen a lot of at the time, and it was absolutely the right choice!

Another change was I originally intended to post the fic all as one story but as hard as I tried to edit, I couldn't get it under 10k. I also realized the sections of the fic seemed to have much less of an obvious throughline than I thought, leaving them feel like 3 interconnected oneshots instead of one fluid piece so after much reassurance from Cass (and an audience poll bc of course 🤓) I eventually made the decision to flesh out the sections (especially the 2nd chapter, I was adding to that literally up until it posted) and publish as a 3 part series like it is now.

I was super apprehensive about this decision (I already felt like the fic was self-indulgent, prolonging it for 3 posts seemed like a lot to ask from the audience. Plus the smut contained acts I hadn't written before - and honestly don't see a lot in fic - so I thought it might alienate some readers 😬) but I'm glad I made this call, it reads much better as 3 individual stories.

Last anecdote: the last half of the shower chapter (Ash's "treat," so to speak 🤡) is actually reimagined smut that I cut from a previous fic. That was originally part of a shower scene in my fic Hot n Cold but I edited it because it felt suuuuper gratuitous in that context (and I was once again nervous about scandalizing my audience at the time who I thought were there for soft boyfriend feels 🤷🏻‍♀️). I think it definitely works better here.

Oh actually another similar anecdote: the scene of Ash rolling the joint was actually lifted and reworked from a high!Ash fic Cass started that I kind of horned my way into lmao. Her initial write didn't detail the process and when I suggested she expand on it, she asked me to "guest write" it basically 😂

By the time I got to the smoking portion of my fic, hers had kind of stalled and I asked if I could repurpose what I had written (partly bc I liked it and partly bc I was in danger of burning out) and if she picked hers back up, I'd write her something new 😂💙 And the new version ended up being one of my fav scenes in the whole series! 😏🥰

I learned a lot from this fic! I've always written for me but this was actually a big step in me deciding to write what I want without also worrying about the reaction. Everything in that story was something I wanted to see realized and I followed thru with it (even though it was a much more complex write logistically than I imagined) and I'm so glad I did! And I'm so glad that it seems like you enjoyed it too!

[redrosecarnage]

Consequences

A small thing I wrote about Basil’s bullying and self harm issues; I’d like to expand on it and even write more about it bc it didn’t turn out exactly as I wanted but oh well, I can always refine it before posting on ao3 right. For now, enjoy and pls be aware of the trigger warning! 

TW // Self Harm mention and description

Basil’s sitting by the sidewalk, once again. Holding back his tears, he stays in place until they leave and picks up his belongings, scattered all over. His shirt smells of Orange Joe and sticks to everything it touches, despite Basil’s attempts of drying it before heading home. After a few moments of silent sobs, he walks home crestfallen, wondering if things would be better with Sunny by his side. A light autumn breeze caresses his face. He shakes his head, brushing off such a stupid idea. Sunny doesn’t want to see him, Sunny is still grieving, Sunny secretly hates him and that’s why he won’t contact Basil ever again so Basil should just accept that and move on. 

He’d been on his own for three years since that happened. What difference would it make now to have someone to rely on, vent to or simply distract yourself with? To have someone read their favorite poems to you on a rainy day? Or to hear you rambling over plants for an entire day and not get pissed? Basil tries his best to repress his shared memories with his best friend but, when your future is uncertain and your present couldn’t be worse, all you have left is daydreaming about the past. 

The trees alongside the street sing in unison as a rather unseasonal strong wind blows, making Basil in his soaked shirt tremble. He rushes to get back home and can already smell dinner, despite not feeling hungry. He’s been like that for a while, eating only small portions of even his favorite dishes; otherwise he’d violently throw up. Poor Polly : she tries her best to help Basil, constantly cooking different foods and making them bland but it’s useless; he just won’t eat enough. Basil’s greeted by his friendly caretaker, who inquires about what happened to him. Basil wasn’t the rough boy type and she’d never seen him in such bad conditions before, with a messy hair and scrapped knees.

‘On my way home, someone... bumped into me with an Orange Joe can hahaha! But-but it was just a silly accident, nothing to worry about haha!’, he lies.

With his parents away and his grandma’s health deteriorating, Basil didn’t want to be the source of more problems; they already had plenty. Especially Polly : she was initially hired to look after Basil’s grandma, not him. He was simply an addition, as Basil had been living with his grandma since he was a toddler. The stove abruptly beeps and Polly rushes back to the kitchen, telling Basil to go take a shower. 

He makes his way into the corridor and goes towards his grandma’s room, kneeling besides her lavender bed and quietly crying, holding her almost transparent hand. Basil stays there for a while, taking in all the tiny details of her room : the muddy green curtains adorning her window with a flower pot besides it, her bed table with a tea cup as the only witness to their unique moment, her matching lavender bed sheets that still smell like her, her old wardrobe with Basil’s drawing on its door. It feels so familiar but he knows she’s withering away with each passing day and so, this sense of familiarity gives place to dread. He leans closer and gives her a forehead kiss before heading towards the bathroom, tears dripping down to the wooden floor. 

Basil’s cuts flourish when taking a hot shower like this one, pink reddish lines making their way through his milky wrists. He averts his eyes for a while but soon finds himself oddly mesmerized by what he does when Polly isn’t around. At least, the weather was helping him by bringing cloudy, rainy and mostly cold days where long sleeves were the rule; not like anyone would care enough to notice them anyways. He runs his fingers up and down each fadded scar, his mind eager for more; the cyclic nature of life and death at his will. Self imposed rebirth, on a microscopic level. It’s tempting.

Now dressed in clean clothes, he steps out of the bathroom and joins his caretaker on the table, adorning fake smiles as they have dinner together. Basil became used to it when Polly moved in but, before that, eating at a table with his parents was an anomaly. They were hardly in town and whenever that happened, would have their meals at different times often leaving Basil to eat alone. It’s not that they were bad parents, they were just very busy people and Basil’s feelings were the last of their priorities. Or perhaps Basil was so annoying even his parents got tired of him and that’s why he’s been living with his grandma ever since. Maybe he shouldn’t have been born at all.

A heavy lump forms on his throat and, as soon as small blobs drop down his pale cheeks, he excuses himself and makes his run towards the bathroom. Ah yes, the faithful bathroom, a room that never betrayed him. His tiny stomach squishes on itself, leaving a frail Basil shaking by the toilet with a relieved smile on his face. Polly gently knocks on the door five minutes later, to check on him; she knows better than to leave Basil alone. All his dinner now lies down the drain, along with most of Basil’s connections. And, as soon as he’s placed in bed, the cycle repeats once more.