#i had three versions of the opening scene and somehow it was the hardest to write

[avocado-frog]

Dahlia. 3

Chapter rating: T Word count: 3,000 Title: 6/5/2020 Warnings: None i think (i always worry that i've missed something) Summary: One year, two months later.

Sam could hardly stand the park.

He sat on warm grass, his fingers pressed into the soil, leaning back on his arms. an orange basketball rested in his lap. The sun shined down on him through trees and light, warm wind. In the distance, a group of kids chased each other around on the basketball court, no longer playing their game, since Sam had the ball.

The basketball court was behind the playground, but didn't destruct the meadow to the left of the park, or the garden to the right. Sam was sitting in the shade of one of the trees where the garden was. He didn't like the garden.

One year, two months ago, Ryan left ten minutes after Jaxon did. Sam had gone to find him, when neither he nor Jaxon came home after two hours. By that point, Leo had driven off to visit a friend. Sam had seen Jaxon leaning against the fountain, awake, but hurt. He had a broken hand, a concussion, and a broken rib, along with a couple of cuts and bruises. Ryan wasn't there when Sam tried to find him. And then, Leo didn't come back.

Sam leaned forward, folding his arms over his basketball, resting his chin on the textured rubber. Footsteps approached him, speeding through the recently-cut grass.

Sam glanced up, and one of his friends- Rowan, he met him a few weeks before- knelt down on the grass in front of him.

"Hey!" Rowan smiled, and poked Sam's shoulder. He adjusted his gold glasses with his thumb, the fingernail wrapped in a blue bandage. Remnants of paint splatters stained his arms. "You okay? You looked like you spaced out for a second."

"Hm?" Sam sat up. "No, I'm okay. Are you guys finished?"

"Ah, I don't know. The others wanted me to get some snacks from the gas station. Want something?"

Sam shrugged. Rowan nodded and stood up, and held out an arm. Sam stood up.

"You can come with, if you don't wanna be alone with the others just yet," Rowan offered, and Sam smiled a little.

He didn't know the other three very well, having only met them that day. They were all much older, the oldest one was twenty, Rowan was the youngest, fifteen. Sam was twelve. He always managed to be one of the youngest ones in any of his friend groups.

Sam left the basketball on the grass, assuming the others weren't going to take it, and followed Rowan. Past the garden, to the sidewalk. The convenience store was on the lowest floor of a large group of buildings by the bus depot. It wasn't too far from Sam's house. He went down there for snacks often.

"Have either of your siblings answered?" Rowan asked carefully. He knew about Leo and Ryan's disappearance, after Sam had accidentally let it slip.

"No..." Sam mumbled, frowning a little. He called Leo and Ryan both every night as often as he could, hoping one of them would respond. They never did.

"Hm." Rowan hummed flatly. "I'm sure they will eventually. Don't worry."

"Yeah..." Sam nodded to himself. They turned the corner to the convenience store. "My cousin should be coming back from college soon."

A change in topic was welcome, though it still felt odd referring to Logan as his cousin. He left four months ago, he hadn't been able to visit yet.

Sam could tell Rowan that his sister got in a fight with his cousin (Jaxon) and that she took his brother and left. Sam wore a set of fingerless gloves to hide the mark on the back of his hands. He told Rowan that his eyes were amber and not gold and that people always got confused about it, he blatantly denied having any sort of magic, denied knowing anyone with magic, the labs, denied all of it. It felt like a betrayal, but Rowan didn't need to know.

To Rowan, Sam and his brothers had lost their mother at the age of five, lived in foster care for the following five years, and got adopted by their cousin, Logan, at the age of ten, when they met their older sisters, and the other kids there.

Sam wandered around the small building, weaving through steel aisles of chips and pretzels and the refrigerators with soda and coffee. He wasn't looking for anything in particular, but Rowan had a sticky note with a list of what the others wanted.

-

The basketball pounded against asphalt. The sound of children's loud, excited screaming pierced the air of the park. A family of cardinals chirped in a nearby tree. Sam nearly screamed when the basketball was thrown into his hands.

He looked up; a group of older boys, twice his age and triple his height, the youngest being fifteen, the oldest nearly twenty. He was amazed that they had let him play, but the fifteen year old had seen him after school. He was good, the boy had told his friends, and so Sam accepted their challenge, and landed himself in a one-on-four with the other kids.

Sam skidded to the basket, and nearly tripped over his own shoelaces. He could've played any other sport, he had joined three the minute he started going back to school, sometime after Leo left. It was easy to forget about that when he was trying to beat a group of teenagers at the age of twelve.

It was the perfect distraction. On days when he had afterschool games, with the amount of sports he had joined, almost every day, he got to stay for an extra hour and a half, which then meant he could go home, eat his food as quick as possible, and go to bed. He didn't have to talk to anyone on good days. Those days were Wednesdays, when he had both track and basketball. Those days, he genuinely was too exhausted to do anything else.

"You're not bad, kid," Jonquil said, he sat down on the grass. He was the oldest, if Sam remembered right, though he was still a few years younger than Logan. Sam watched in astonishment as the boy opened the water and chugged it, finally crumpling the plastic in his hand and tossing it in the grass. "How long have you been playing?"

Sam shrugged, and struggled to get his candy open. Rowan smiled, taking it from him, and ripping it open easily, handing it back to him.

"A year and a half, I think? My sister's-" Sam paused. What should he refer Lily to? She wasn't exactly his sister, but she could technically be his cousin, since Jaxon and Kai were dating, and Kai was his cousin. He would go with cousin, for now, though he wouldn't call Lily that to her face, no matter how many times she called him her cousin. "...My cousin taught me a while ago."

"Oh," Jonquil responded, still smiling. He turned back to the other two, still on the court, and shouted at them, told them to hurry up and finish. "Invite your cousin over, sometime."

Sam shrugged, stomach twisting a bit. Whether Lily would want to do that was a gamble. Lily of before would. He barely saw her anymore. "Maybe. She's really busy."

With that final thought, he turned back to Caspian and Stefan. Caspian was winning, five-to-three, even though Stefan was taller than him. Caspian seemed faster.

Rowan's timer buzzed again, startling him a bit. The older boys came running back, hair stuck to their foreheads, breathing heavily. Jonquil sighed heavily at the sight of them, but turned back to Sam.

"You heading home?"

Sam noticed belatedly that the sun was setting, the sky a bright red and dark orange. It was getting dark. Lily would freak out if he was too late. If she noticed. "Yeah, I probably should."

"Alright. Need us to walk you there? It's not exactly safe for a kid to walk alone in a city like this," someone offered, but he wasn't sure who. He was pretty sure it was Rowan, who had a softer voice than the others, but he was too busy, picking up the orange duffel bag and basketball he had brought.

"No." Sam smiled, bright and fake. Secretly, he wished he could go home with one of them. He'd only known them for a day, though. And he'd known the others for almost two years now. He shouldn't be dreading going home. "I'll be fine. It's just down the street."

"If you're sure." Rowan shrugged, and patted his head in a gesture that felt familiar. "We'll see you tomorrow? Same time."

Sam felt his face brighten, feeling lighter. Another distraction. It was harder to find in the summer. "Yeah! I'll see you then."

The others nodded at him, smiling, as they turned the other direction, laughing loudly at each other. Sam's smile faded, as he shifted the duffel bag over one shoulder, pulling on the strap, and began his journey home.

He crossed the sidewalk, dug his foot into a drying puddle; it'd rained the day before, and tried to make a footprint with what little water was left.

He glanced up, icy fear digging in his stomach. Leo's car still wasn't there. Leo still wouldn't come back. How long had it been now?

...He was pretty sure he lost track after the third month.

Sam's fist hovered above the door. Should he knock? Would it matter? He shook his head, arm dropping limply to his side. He dug the key out of his bag, in a hidden pocket where he wouldn't lose it, and quietly unlocked the door.

He knew the sight he would be met with when he opened the door, but it was okay to pretend. Maybe, today was the day Leo and Ryan came back. Her car broke down, so she had to take the bus. Maybe, she found the others on the way back, and so they were home, too. Logan didn't call him to let him know so it would be a surprise. They were all waiting in the living room for him.

Sam pushed the door open, pausing at the sound of the TV playing a movie. Normally, the other three didn't stay downstairs for very long. Sam was used to going back home and finding the house silent, so this was new.

He closed the door quietly, sliding his shoes off, setting his bag on the floor. He wrung his hands together, shuffling towards the couch.

Jaxon was there, sitting on the couch with his chin resting on his knees and his arms folded around his ankles, staring at the screen. Black hair hung loosely over his eyes, he didn't seem to hear Sam. At least, he wasn't acknowledging him.

Sam stared at him for a moment, sighed to himself, and held onto the railing as he walked back up the stairs, turning the corner to his room.

His room, the guest room he had stayed in while Ryan wouldn't leave his, was the room he decided to keep as his. It had been two months over a year since his siblings disappeared, and Sam still hadn't had the time to get his stuff from his room, or go anywhere near that room, or go anywhere near Leo's room. Or Cass's. Or Logan's. Or Elliot's. Or the attic. Sam spent most of his time in his or Lily's room, actually. If he absolutely had to be in the house.

He sat on the floor, against his bed, with an orange blanket draped over his head. He stared at his phone, scrolling through his list of contacts. Out of all of them, he was the only one who consistently attempted to keep in contact with the others. Even if Jaxon ignored him, or if Leo and Ryan wouldn't respond, or if Logan was busy.

He always called Cass first, because she never ignored her phone, and they could have an actual conversation. Cass was pleasant to talk to, and he got to talk to his cousins, as a bonus.

Sam dialed his sister's number, and waited. She answered fast, along with Kai and Marcy. They kept the conversation relatively light, (Cass did ask if they got any news about Elliot. She stopped asking about Leo and Ryan a few months ago.) Cass asked how his last day of school had been, and Sam pretended like he hadn't skipped it with Rowan and the others today.

Cass, after thirty minutes, told him that dinner was ready, that she would talk to him tomorrow, and hung up.

Cass left six months after Leo did, a couple of days after her birthday in October, when Elliot wasn't getting any better, when Jaxon still had panic attacks just looking at her (the downside of being the identical twin of a girl who could have killed him if he hit his head a little harder), when Ryan and Leo still hadn't come back. She said it was for a few weeks, just so that Jaxon wouldn't have to hide from her, it was for his recovery. And then, a few weeks passed, and she just... stayed in Maine with her cousins.

Sam almost went with her. He almost went with her. But, if his siblings came back, they would go to Logan's house, not Kai's. If Elliot woke up, or if something happened to him, it would happen at Logan's house, not Kai's. And Elliot needed to stay at Logan's. Dylan's magic was the only thing keeping him alive, and Sam suspected that it was the only reason Dylan hadn't left, too. Where they would go, Sam wasn't sure.

Logan next. It was a gamble, whether he would talk for very long or not. He'd always answer, but he was a fourth year college student, he didn't have time to do anything other than homework and going to classes. Again, Logan asked how he was doing, how Elliot was doing, and whether Leo or Ryan answered yet. Logan said he would be coming home soon, and then said he had to write some essay, and hung up.

Logan left two months after Cass, in December. It was when his college classes started, and he lived two hours away from his school, so he opted to stay in a dorm. Out of everyone, Sam had expected Logan to leave the most. He had been talking about finishing college for a long time now, it had simply been a matter of time. But Dylan was still upset about it, especially since Logan never visited.

Sam held his breath. Anxiety pricked his stomach. He hit Leo's name in his phone.

It rang exactly four times, before Leo declined the call. That was the only way Sam knew she was still alive, she would decline the calls, instead of letting them go to voicemail. It was still disheartening.

Sam remembered the last time he saw his sister, when Ryan said that Leo took him and Dylan to an aquarium, that she bought them both stuff from the gift shop, which she never did. Ryan said that he thought she was acting off that day. He knew her leaving was planned, but he didn't think Ryan planned on leaving, or that she planned on fighting Jaxon.

Now of course, nobody knew for sure that she got in a fight with Jaxon. The day Logan and Sam and Dylan stayed up late waiting for them to come home, when only Jaxon ever did, when he collapsed at the front door, he had a concussion, and a broken rib, and two broken fingers, and nobody knew how. Logan asked, and Jaxon never answered. Nobody knew for sure that they fought, but it was easy to assume.

The way he wouldn't talk about Leo, the way he screamed when he ran into Cass the next morning, the panic attacks he got seeing Cass, or walking to the park, or seeing the park out the window, everyone knew what happened.

Ryan, unlike Leo, let the calls go to voicemail, but Sam called him every night regardless. He left a voicemail, told him of any updates regarding their brother, asked him whether he was with Leo or not, asked if he was okay. He didn't know if Ryan listened to the voicemails or not, but if he did, Sam would be a little embarrassed. He used his brother's voicemail as a journal of sorts.

There were four things nobody knew. If Ryan had gone with Leo on his own accord, if he saw Jaxon and Leo's fight, got scared, and ran away, if he was found by a member of one of the labs, or if Leo took him.

Sam didn't believe the last two. Best-case scenario, he was with Leo, completely of his own free will, and safe. Worst-case, he was in the lab somewhere, by himself. Sam refused to believe that Leo would take him. No matter what Lily tried to say, no matter what Cass said Leo used to be like, Leo wouldn't hurt him.

Leo would have left Jaxon wherever he was, walking towards where Ryan stood. After that, Sam wasn't sure. It was likely that Ryan was afraid of their sister, and ran off before she could get too close. Maybe Leo grabbed him by the arm, and maybe she didn't want anyone to know what happened, and maybe she took him with her. Or maybe, she ignored him as she walked past, maybe Ryan ran after her instead, begging to go with her. Either way, Sam didn't like the outcome.

---

A small, black cat weaved through Ryan's ankles as he tried to walk down the sidewalk, the weight of a plastic bag heavy in his hand.

The cat had been following him around for a few months now, Ryan had named it Bagel. He gave it a strawberry one day, and it hadn't left him alone since. Not that he minded, of course. He liked the cat.

The sidewalk never failed to startle him with how empty it was. Even if it had been over a year now, he was still used to the city, with the overwhelming crowds, bright lights, loud sounds. The quiet, small, practically abandoned town was a welcome change, if not a little lonely.

There was a grocery store, where the windows had been spray painted pink and lime green, and had been smashed with a car. The man who worked there was in his late seventies, named Gregory. There was a gas station, owned by Linda and Megan, and a bakery, owned by Owen. A pharmacy owned by Alicia and David, and two kids his age, Linda and Megan's kids, Ashlynn and Makayla. He didn't talk to them, despite the girl's efforts to be friends. They had a few houses, and a park. That was all, really. There was a town nearby with more things.

Ryan sighed to himself, picking his cat up with his free arm. Weird cat anatomy allowed the cat to flop it's body around his arm, and remain comfortable, purring against his wrist.

The town, somewhere in Massachusetts, away from New Hampshire by a few hours, consisted of a total of ten people. That included himself and Leo.

Ryan didn't particularly like going to the store. Usually, Leo didn't make him go alone, but she was busy today, and they needed food. The store- with only ten people in the town- was going out of business fast, so Ryan got most things at half the price.

The man at the cash register, the owner of the store, was nice to the other people there, or so Ryan had seen on the off chance he encountered someone at the same time as him. But as soon as he and Leo got there, the man's demeanor changed. Ryan didn't know why. Leo said that he may have seen the mark on Ryan's hand. He knew they were magic, that was why. Leo said not to pay attention to him.

Leo wasn't staying in one of the small houses like the other residents were, she had said that they were full of asbestos or some shit, (paraphrasing) and instead chose to stay in the old, abandoned elementary school.

Ryan approached the, admittedly quite sad, building. It was only one-story tall, had a gym, cafeteria, and twenty-four classrooms. Leo had taken a second-grade science classroom, while Ryan used a kindergarten room.

He pushed the glass doors open with the hand holding the bag. The cat squirmed out of his arm, scurrying inside the building.

"Leo?" Ryan called out softly. Leo glanced at him from a lunch table near the door, waving with one hand. "I'm back."

"Hey," Leo greeted. Ryan set the grocery bag on the table, sitting across from his sister. "How was Greg?"

"He didn't say anything. He just told me to pay, and left me alone."

"Good." Leo slid him his phone from across the table. "I fixed your phone, by the way. Your brother called."

Somehow, the SD card came out of the phone, but Leo had managed to find a replacement. Losing the SD card meant that he didn't get any internet, he couldn't take calls. But he knew Sam called him everyday, because he called Leo everyday.

"He called you, too?"

"Yeah."

"You should answer him." Ryan thought of some of the voicemails Sam would leave. He felt bad for never responding. If Sam asked where he was, he wasn't sure how he could respond.

"You should respond to him." Leo dug through the plastic grocery bag. "You know what else you should do?"

"Don't say it..."

"Go home," Leo glared at him pointedly. "Remember what Sam's voicemail said that one time? That Lily thinks I kidnapped you, or some shit? If anything, you kidnapped me. You have to go home."

"Are you going to come?"

"Probably not."

The only thing that kept him staying in that town was his sister. He wanted to go home more than anything else. Leo was going to stay. He didn't want to leave her alone.

"I'm staying here."

[rebtrovert-girl]

Celebratory Note: Drunken Honesty

As this story has come to an end, I feel like talking about it a little more since this is my first mid-length fic, made with adapting the story into a modern one, and tbh the first ever long story I manage to finish (for real, I've been writing for as long as I can remember and I have soooooo many drafts, not just about LawBin but other real manuscript but I never manage to finish anything) so this one deserved to be celebrate and talked about by me :D Or, really, I just wanna babbling it out even without any excuse.

Honestly I used to dislike a modernized fanfic of something that was originally set in their own universe. When I first thought of this idea I kinda thought to myself: what the hell???? Very naive if you ask me. Look where I land now, I love writing this so freaking much!

I didn't plan to name each chapter with anything or even idioms at first. It was done because I've been listening to Billie Eilish- Birds of a Feather a lot when I wrote the first chapter and I started to envision the ending with that song. I just knew I needed to name the last chapter with it, or at least I have to kinda insert the song in the last scene. I ended up naming every chapter with idioms just so I can use Birds of a Feathers in the last one. But that somehow helps me a lot in putting the plot point and what I want to have in every chapter neatly. Like in chapter 1: Cat Out of The Bag focus on Robin spilling her secret, and in chapter 2: Beat Around the Bush was used literally in their first meet and figuratively to describe Law's reaction for her confession which is trying to hide from it.

The making of Last Chapter: Birds of a Feather is really the hardest not just because I was in the middle of rushing my assignment that I need to redo, but I also rewrite it three times from the beginning LOL. The thing with me is, when I feel very stuck on some part I just know that something isnt right from the beginning so I will definitely rewrite it :D. I got very stuck on the first two versions and I finally let it be for a few days before I start again. Although the reunion scene was envisioned since the first time I wrote this and as I listen to the song, the build up to that scene was never determined and thats my real headache. I still have doubt about how it turn out even as I post it, but what matters to me was I did manage to finish it the way I want it.

As a non-English speaker, naming each chapter with idioms is a huge deal and has become one of the most fun parts for me. It's huge because I need to find the one that fits the most to describe what happened in the chapter, thus I get to read a lot of idioms and I learn a lot along the way. Definitely a fun excuse to learn more English!

I'm not really a Sannami shipper but I ended up inserting them in addition to Saboala because I want both Robin and Law to have a reflection of how a friends to lovers relationship could be. That's also why I randomly put Law and Sabo together as roommates even though they have almost zero interaction in the canon world. I know in fanfic, writers have the freedom to write characters however they want to, but I don't actually like steering too far from canon. Chapter 3: Greener Grass is the second title I found and I knew all along I want to have these two other ships mentioned in here.

Aside from LawBin, my second ship in OP is indeed Saboala and I've been wanting and trying to write about them for some time. I had drafts of their stories in my file to which I was never able to finish. Their little inclusion in this story is an excuse and open door for me if maaayyyybbbbeeeee I wanna attempt to tackle a sequel/spin-off of this that focused on their story one day (who knows?????)

The story was originally planned to be done in 6 chapters. I had to improvise a bit when I wrote Chapter 4: Skeletons in The Closet that was never part of my plan. In the original idea, Cora and the part where Robin realizes what she did when she was drunk are supposed to be in chapter 3. But as I said in that chapter's note, something came up (real life happened) and I wasn't able to write for a week. If I continue to follow the original plan, chapter 3 would be pushed for another week and it makes me weary. So on a whim I decided to divide the chapter into two, with chapter 3 just focusing on the couple reflecting their relationship with others, and chapter 4 with the revelation of what has been done since the first chapter. I went into a frenzy when I uploaded chapter 3 because I felt bad for not following my original plan. You guys have no idea how grateful I am for the feedback you gave and it push me forward on writing more :D

I have thought about actually writing some smut here in the middle of writing this but then I scratch the idea because; first, I've never write a smut before so I think I still need some practice(?) and second, as much as I like for the two to get hot and down to business, I've never plan on it initially. Mood wise, I feel like it'd be a little forced if I suddenly insert something too sexual. Maybe I'll do that some other time with different stories (?????)

Chapter 5- Down the Rabbit Hole, where Sabo somehow become the MVP was coincidentally came out at the same time as eps 1116 release, which was when Sabo come back to the anime for Reverie arc. It was pure coincidence but a really nice one and I want to keep remembering it!

In writing, there is this saying: Kill your darlings, which means to eliminate the overuse of favorite characters or tropes to cut the unnecessary part. In one of the writing courses I took years ago, they also explain this as a way to not include too many unimportant details, such as a character that doesn't do much to the story and doesn't need to be explained in detail. Again, my take as this piece is a fanfic, I took the liberty to have as much fun as I could with every character I could add to the story. Like Doflamingo, yeah this psychopath has no business whatsoever to be in this light hearted romcom story of Law and Robin. But I wanna have fun with him and my only reason for including him is only so I can write him say in another world he'd die in Luffy's hand (I love irony). That's also why I make them neighbours. It's unimportant but it's fun. The characters might be Oda's but the universe of this story is mine so I'll do as I like it. But in the end, I still tried to limit this thing so the story didn't snowball too big. I hate to add more chapters haha

Saul and Cora's inclusion here is my second favorite take. I just know if I want to write something that can assure Law and Robin did have a good childhood, these two characters need to exist in their story. And I just feel so proud to come up with this two quotes for them:

You are my daughter but you are always going to be a Nico- Saul I bet on your happiness- Cora

I know it's just me being overdramatic (like this whole post is) but I'm proud because it feels like the kind of thing their characters would even say in canon :D

12. I do have some ideas for bonus chapter (!!!!!) but nothing has been written yet and I dont want to make empty promises anymore so for now lets just save it as a surprise when it did happen one day

I think I've talked enough. I write this purely because I want to have this story, but I'm glad to know that there are people who can enjoy it as much. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Thank you so much <3 Honestly when I first started writing LawBin I thought it was just going to be a one time thing, but look at me now! I don't know how long I will be able to write them and have fun with everyone before real life consumes me; but in this moment and time, I feel so grateful that I could share the same joy of having fun from what I like with people who have the same favorites. Cheers to all of us, and hopefully I can greet you with a new story soon! (Idea is always there, I do have my own draft list too, the problem is always the same: TIME)

Full chapter of Drunken Honesty by me (chilldeokjil) is now on AO3!

[fyonahmacnally]

20 Questions More

This is a deeper and more detailed version of the 20 questions for AO3 fanfic writers. Thanks to @casualsavant for the tag. I'm not even sure I did the first 20 Questions round, but rules be damned.

1) How do you keep getting ideas for your ship/fandom?

Well, like anything I write, I get ideas from everything around me - they come to me from dreams, something I see, from random prompts, etc. As most writers know, we are simply the vessel, it's the brain goblins that tell us what to do.

2) Which authors inspire you in your fandom, and why are they so freakishly good?

Geez, we have so many in the Supercorp/Supergirl fandom. I'm not even sure that's a fair question. HA. I will inevitably leave someone out, but here are a few of my favorites @searidings, @jazzfordshire, @chaotic-super, @lovesastateofmind1, @innamorament0, @someoneyouloved93, @lostariels, @luthordamnvers, @thornedrose44, and @fazedlight. I read such a variety of genres, tags, and tropes that I will give almost anything a chance so the authors I read will vary. There's oh so many to choose from in this fandom and the vast talent is beyond imagination!

3) Aside from the characters of your main ship, who are the characters you love to write?

Hmmm, I like writing Sam, Andrea, and Jack. The rest of the main cast is fun too, but those three characters are fun to explore in fics. The shenanigans they get into together makes it easy to play with.

4) Are there pairings or tropes you know for sure you'd never write about? Which ones?

Karamel, Lames, and Kalex. I am pretty open-minded, but those are my hard limit ships. To each their own. It's not my thing at all. I'm pretty open to tropes, too. Haven't had a chance to explore too many yet.

5) What is your writing process and why is it cursed?

I'm not sure how to answer this one, really. It can vary depending on what's going on in my life and how the idea came about.

Generally speaking, I get an idea, outline the basic premise of the story (usually in a word or google doc), do whatever research is needed (longer fics), and just start writing (or staring at the outline and empty doc). That's writing too, ask any writer. LOL

One shots tend to be more like: get idea, sit at desk thinking while blank doc stares back at me tauntingly, look out window, turn back to blank doc, write three sentences, back space all three sentences, look out window again, write three more sentences, repeat previous steps, then the brain goblins take over and suddenly it's 4 hours later, somehow there's several thousand words staring back at me.

6) What is your favorite part of your writing process?

Because I am a huge nerd, the research. I love to research the things I write. Not all of my stories require it, but when they do, I dive right in. Completing the story is a big one too. The anxiety and excitement that comes with yeeting something into the ether is indescribable.

7) What’s the weirdest thing you’ve had to research for a fic?

Weirdest thing...pagan rituals and ancient runes or bondage/fetish clubs in Amsterdam. There is some really interesting things out there. I learned a lot during that time.

8) Is there a particular writing rule you struggle with (grammar, spelling, tense, reality in general)?

I think tense is one that slips on me. I try to catch them all during rereads and edits, but those little bastards are sneaky.

9) What was your hardest scene to write so far and why?

The panic attacks and abuse scenes relating to Lena in Carterhaugh-Wood Academy (CWA). Lena is my absolute favorite character and writing anything that causes her harm hurts my soul.

10) Have your characters ever done something you didn’t expect, changing your plot completely?

Is water wet? My characters always do what the brain goblins want despite my initial protest. I am just here to convey the message, after all.

11) If you could converse with any of the characters, who would it be and why?

Oh, hands down, Lena. I wouldn't pass up a chance to speak with any of them, let's be real, but Lena would be #1.

12) What are some of the tropes or themes that you find yourself returning to in your writing?

I am by nature a fluff and happy-ending writer. However, I am working on an angst with a happy ending fic at the moment. The tropes I have written so far have been limited to friends to lovers and a little light angst with happy ending. I'm still exploring other things. Hopefully 2024 will be the year I can flex my writing muscles and expand into new territory.

13) What's your most important resource as a writer?

Friends and other writers. Nothing beats a good brainstorming session with writer pals. I also like to do improv writing to boost creativity. You never know where a story will go when that happens.

14) Can you share some of your strategies for editing and revising your work?

The strategy depends on the story. For longer fics, I have a few writer friends that help with reading over it and helping with typos, grammar errors, and helping fluff up the places that need it. For one shots or shorter fics, I will let it sit for a bit, go back and read it again to do the editing and rewrite the places that my brain doesn't like.

15) Which is worse: making the summary, picking the tags, or the anxiety when you post your fic?

Oooof, definitely the posting anxiety. I usually immediately find something else to do so I don't obsess over it.

16) How do you define success for your fanfic - hits? Kudos? Comments? Bookmarks? Or just if you like it?

Hits, kudos, and comments are always fun and rewarding, but I write for my own enjoyment and sanity. I have plenty of fics that barely get any love, but I enjoy writing them. It's therapeutic for me. The rest is just noise. Also, like any writer, I love to hear from readers and try to respond to all my comments because they mean a lot to me.

17) Do you have a playlist for your favorite character/ship?

Sometimes, yes. It depends on what I am writing and how I am feeling. Most of the time it is instrumental piano and/or cello music because I will start accidentally typing the lyrics of a regular playlist. If I am going for a specific vibe or writing because of a specific song, I will have the song on repeat or at least an album by the artist.

18) If fan art was going to be made from your work, which fic would you pick and which fan artist would you like to create it?

SCBB delivered that on a platter for me. CWA got art from the multi-talented @bigmammallama5. If you haven't seen it, you can check it out here.

19) How many WIPs do you currently have?

13 total with another one that is in the planning stages.

20) What's your advice to new fanfic writers?

Write for yourself. If you love it, it brings you enjoyment, and adds to your life, continue doing it. You're not going to please everyone and there will be people who are less than kind about something you publish. Those voices don't matter. There is someone out there that has read or will read your work and it will stick with them for the rest of their lives. Always do it for you.

Tagging but no pressure: @lovesastateofmind1 @casualkoalatea @fabulousglitch and @sssammich

[sukirichi]

sweet lies [02]

His lies were way too sweet – and you were too addicted to make him stop.

cw. explicit smut, slight body worship, public sex, dirty talk, praising, toxic megumi, fwb dynamics, slight angst, body marking, sukuna bullying megumi, age gap, scratching, mentions of oral (m receiving) and mutual masturbation, the traditional unedited fic

note. choose your fighter, megumi or sukuna 😈 also UHM do you guys want me to make the ending angsty or fluffy? i wrote out two versions so LOL let me know what you think! we’ll get more of the megumi scenes on the next chapter though~

series masterlist | 01 | 02 | 03

Sukuna isn’t kidding when he said he’ll have you unable to walk by the end of this.

You’ve lost count of how many times you guys have fucked.

Once more in the stalls when you thought of repaying the favor by sucking him off, followed by him growing impatient and hauling you inside his car. Both of you were too tired to go for another round, but were still very much addicted for the other’s touch that mutual masturbation seems like the best option.

Thankfully, Sukuna’s cut his nails, so having three of his fingers buried knuckle deep in you feels like absolute heaven. He’s not complaining about your smooth hands wrapped around his shaft either, especially not when you’ve had enough practice with Megumi to know just how to make a guy lose his mind. By the time you’ve made it back home, Sukuna’s grown hard again, too impatient to make it to the bed before he just fucks you raw against the wall. You’re trembling at his hold, left with no choice but to trust his strength to drop you on his cock and bounce you to his pleasure.

It’s a miracle you’ve made it on the bed.

His digital clock reads a quarter at three in the morning, and for a moment, you worry about how tired you’ll be in class tomorrow when Sukuna’s large hands grips your thighs sharply.

“Goddamn,” he hisses through clenched teeth, chuckling at the irresistible sight of your breasts bouncing before him. Limbs tangled, minds controlled with the primal need to fuck, and moans shared with his deep grunts – you somehow end up on top of him, your thighs feeling like they’re on the verge of giving up as you continue to ride his thick length.

“You are so fucking sexy,” he slaps your ass and causes your hips to rut deeper, forcing that delicious curve of his cock to meld with your walls. You throw your head back, palms planted on his chest, focused only on that burning pleasure between your thighs. “I could fuck you all night long.”

Even though you truly have no wish to, you shake your head, fingers balling into a fist. “I have class tomorrow, need to wake up early,” you protest, the words falling into deaf ears as Sukuna thrusts up into you. He must’ve noticed how you’re growing tired and took matters into his own hands, feet grounded on the mattress to pound deliriously into you. You’re debating whether to be thankful or frustrated he still has so much energy even after hours of fucking, but it honestly doesn’t matter. You’re falling into his chest, arms slipping on your equally sweat-covered bodies. Right now, you just wanted to cum – once more, again, one last time! “Ah, Sukuna, t-too much!”

“Too much?” he laughs and tangles his hand to caress your scalp, the gesture too soothing that you almost forgot he’s fucking you into oblivion. “Want me to go slow?”

“No…”

“Thought so, sweetheart,” his grin is absolutely cocky as he bends his knees in a fold, pushing you until your back rests on his muscular thighs. Your mouth falls open at his hands wrapping around your threat, keeping you right there, hips flat and grinding on his cock. “Come on. Come for me,” Sukuna urges, tightening his hold around your neck a little harder.  

That’s all you need for your vision to blur and see stars, your body’s shaking uncontrollable. He’s thrusting with all his power and energy that it feels like you’re nothing but a hole on top of him, tongue falling open in a wanton manner as your drool trails down your chin.

You look filthy, you feel filthy, and yet, Sukuna sees it entirely different.

“So – fucking – gorgeous, fuck. I woulda fucked you sooner if I didn’t feel weird about it.”

“What?”

“Aw, come on, sweetheart,” he smirks at your half fucked out state. Sukuna rolls his hips in such a mind numbing manner that you end up staring at the ceiling, trying your hardest to decipher the colors of his room to get a grip of yourself. But he feels so hot, cock throbbing and pulsing inside you, your puffy lips encasing him with a translucent ring of cum and it feels so fucking good you don’t really understand what he’s saying anymore. “Did you really think I never saw you in my dreams?” he slaps your ass again, the reflexive response of tightening around him pulling a deep groan from the beautiful man beneath you. “I have such a sexy roommate, I couldn’t help it.”

“Then why didn’t you – ah, right there, shit – tell me?”

“Cuz,” he snickers and finally lets you breathe, your pupils blowing wide from the sudden flow of air. Sukuna kneads your breasts greedily, never stopping his mind-numbing rhythm of ramming deep into you. Your body burns, your thighs ache, your pussy feels sensitive but you can’t find the energy to stop him. Instead, you fall prey, failing in your mission to keep him wrapped around your fingers because now you’re wrapped around his cock, and you were quite fucking addicted to it. “You’re my friend’s student. Felt so fucking wrong.”

“What’s the difference now?”

“The difference is,” Sukuna’s face contorts into something of discomfort for a moment before he leans forward, his sturdy grip homing in on your hips again. You feel his searing breath on your ear, so parching it puts the warmth of your pussy to shame. “Having you like this has never felt so right, and I’ll keep fucking you if you let me.”

“I-I’d let you,” you concede absentmindedly and capture his lips for a sloppy kiss, tongues giving up on a battle of dominance. You’re always so clingy when you’re about to come, something Megumi never fails to chastise you for, and you fear Sukuna might push you away as you wrap an arm around him, nails painfully scratching down his back. Red marks leave a trail on its wake until his blood pierces through the sheets, the pain manifested through the increasing roughness of his pace. Now it’s your turn to whimper in his ear, pulling the man close and tugging harshly at the ends of his hair. Gosh, were you actually crying? “Sukuna, I’m close! Yes, yes, right there!”

Sukuna groans at the erotic sounds you reward him with. “Come for me, that’s right, ohhhh,” he stills inside you, his seed spilling deep inside you. You wince at the burst of warmth spreading all over your belly and Sukuna chuckles at your bulging belly. He presses down on it to coax his cum to trickle all over his cock, and he’s fucking filthy – you learn easily – to watch you make a mess on his cock with a childish smile on his face.

You push yourself off him and fall to his side, him following suit not long afterwards. The room feels completely stuffed from your intense fucking, the bruises on your body and scratches on his back a huge attestment to that.

Your legs remain wide open as you clench around nothing, his cum oozing out like a waterfall. Sukuna (that damned pervert) dips two fingers into your hole for one last moment just to drench his fingers in it, his eyes lit up in wonder while he lets it web around his fingers. You snicker at his actions and roll to his side, eyes fluttering close from the wave of exhaustion that comes into full force.

The lingerie set you intended to wear for Megumi was now ripped at the other side of the room, discarded, forgotten – merely evidence of a moment that had never been given to him.

Oddly enough, you don’t feel bad, not even when Sukuna faces you, his cheeks squished by his soft pillows. “I’m spent. I don’t think I’ve ever been this tired. My gym sessions can’t compare to this.”

“You go to the gym?”

“Yeah. I wasn’t born this gorgeous, you know. I had to work hard for this,” Sukuna gestures to his body. You can’t help but follow the gestures and admire the hard planes of his muscle ripped above one another, the smatter of dark hair leading down his hips adding to his already immense sexual charisma. It makes you want to jump on him all over again, and you have to bite your lip to resist that urge, rolling your eyes at him in favor of letting him know you could totally go for another round.

“Dork.”

“Got me laid though, was worth the effort,” he jokes, and you both laugh.

It’s actually…weird, to laugh so casually with someone like this. It might be normal for Sukuna in his past sexual endeavors, but it’s totally a different thing for you. You and Megumi had never even bothered with aftercare. As long as he’s satisfied himself, he’d clean himself off in the bathroom and wear his sweatpants, winking at you before he leaves you alone all over again. The memory – albeit not really a regrettable one – is still painful each time you’re reminded you’ll keep coming back to him.

But are things different now? Could you go back to Megumi? You only ever wanted to fuck Sukuna because you’re sad and horny, but it wouldn’t be fair to him, especially when your roommate has been nothing but nice to you. Besides, him being a little more decent doesn’t immediately equate he’s different than Megumi.

For all you know, you could just be another cheap fuck. Sukuna is older and sexier, after all, he’s clearly had a lot more experience than you do.

As if reading your mind, Sukuna rests his head on his palms, elbows flat on the bed as he turns to you. The expression on his face is unreadable, but there’s some sort of softness behind it – a softness you’re not really familiar with.

“Hey. I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, not everything, anyway, but whatever we have right now, I want you to know it’s not because I see just as a pretty pussy, okay?” he says with a straight face, but you really shouldn’t have gotten your hopes up because Sukuna smirks, mischievous eyes darting back and forth to your soaked pussy and bare breasts. “Although you do have a pretty pussy. Can I eat you out again?”

With that, you snatch the pillow underneath him and whack it straight at his face. Sukuna laughs at your protests, the sound growing louder and a lot more mocking the harder you hit him. “Gosh, Sukuna, shut up!”

You end up hitting him way too many times in the face that he can’t get his words through, and before you could react, Sukuna’s ripped the pillow away from you. He cages you in his arms and hovers over you once more, his boneless dick grazing the insides of your thigh. It’s not meant to be sexual, and nothing about his stance gives off anything that shows he wants to do it again, but you can’t help but feel aroused, shifting your legs up and down the bed as you squirm.

“Seriously though,” he repeats, “We can be casual, or this could be a one time thing. Card’s all yours to play. If you want to forget everything tomorrow, I’d gladly do it. Let’s just go back to the way we were-”

“Sukuna.”

“Yes?”

“Did you really think I was only using you to distract myself?”

Sukuna’s lips flatten into a line. “I’m not stupid,” he says somberly, “I could tell you were still thinking about him. Not that I mind, though, you can’t stop yourself from loving someone,” Faintly, you’re distracted by his thumbs rubbing at your pulse point. It’s so lulling you want to fall asleep, but Sukuna isn’t done talking. “My point is…you don’t have to worry about being weird with me. We could just be friends with benefits, if you want, and not the kind you have with your boy toy either. ”

His blatantly catches you off guard and your eyes widen before they narrow at him, trying your best to hide your embarrassment. If Megumi was painfully honest, Sukuna’s ridiculously blunt that his mere words make your heart do weird things you’d rather not feel.

Careful, you remind yourself, Megumi is the one you want. You have to keep reminding yourself that before your feelings get the best of you. It’s Megumi, it’s always been Megumi and it always will be Megumi. Sukuna is just your roommate who’s nice enough to take your mind off things. You only wish you weren’t lying too much in case he gets the wrong idea you’re leading him on, but then again, isn’t that what you’re doing?

Friends with benefits or not – you still have no plans on getting involved with this guy any longer.

It’s always Megumi. You just really needed a quick fuck, someone whose dick didn’t belong with the guy you’re so hung up on over. The change feels nice and you definitely feel a lot better than the last time you met Megumi, but this guilt…it tastes bitter on your tongue, too heavy to swallow and ignore. It’s always Megumi, you tell yourself again in an attempt to relieve your pain.

Though it doesn’t subside and you huff in exasperation, turning away from Sukuna. You can’t stand looking at him right now.

“I’m not,” you mumble weakly, but the tears – the guilt, the heartbreak of not being Megumi’s lover, the regret and the ironic need to be closer to Sukuna feels all so confusing – all threaten to burst through. You don’t want him to see you cry, that would be lame, so you scoot closer to him and kiss his shoulder as you shyly ask, “C-can we cuddle?”

“Of course,” he chuckles, pulling you closer, “You don’t have to sound too nervous to ask.”

“Sorry, it’s just-”

“He never does that?”

“…Yeah.”

“Well, I’m not him,” Sukuna answers confidently, surprising you when he grabs your ass to press you flush against him. You’re both sweaty and hot to the point it’s uncomfortable, but Sukuna smells so sweet with his lingering cologne that you can’t help yourself from planting your face in his neck, breathing in the little hums he makes. Sukuna kisses the crown of your head – which is a little too sweet than you’d like – while his other hand runs down your back in a slow, sensual manner. Hell, it feels close to body worshipping, and you hate that you silently want more of this. “I’d cuddle you every day if you asked me to.”

“You’re surprisingly sweet,” you voice with a smile. Sukuna’s chest rumbles from the low laughter, and like that, you cling to him like he’s the only sturdy pillar in your life. It’s pathetic, maybe even desperate, but if he doesn’t mind, then why should you?

However, the moment is quickly ruined when the bell rings. “Shit, I forgot he was coming over!”

Sukuna glares at the door and holds you tighter, almost possessively, and refuses to let you go even as you squirm under him. “At three in the morning?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to meet him right now,” you groan helplessly.

Sukuna shoots you a blank look after that, then shoots out of the bed in an instant. You watch as he quickly dresses up in a fresh pair of sweatpants, grabbing a random hoodie from the back of his chair, presumably to hide the scratch marks. You have to hide your smile behind your hand because he looks so drool-worthy with marks littered on his already marked skin, and the fact he lets you mark him is even hotter.

He pauses at the door for a moment, pointing a finger at where you peered up at him curiously. “Stay there. I’ll talk to him and say you went out or whatever. Just make sure to silence your phone in case he calls. Better yet, turn it off.”

Sukuna closes the door behind him, already on the way to the entrance just as you press your ears against the door to eavesdrop. There’s a slight shuffling before the door unlocks, then, “Why the fuck did you lock-” Megumi pauses in his words, and you can perfectly picture his infamous scowl painting his handsome features already. Gosh, you wish you could actually see it, but if Megumi catches you sleeping with someone else, he might totally lose interest in you. That’s not something you could afford to happen.

“Oh. You’re her roommate.” You snigger at his usual what the fuck tone – how Megumi of him.

“Hey, kid, it’s a little too late for a visit, don’t you think?” Sukuna taunts, and it takes everything in you to not burst through the door at that moment. You’re stuck between wanting to laugh and crying, mostly because you would love and hate for Megumi to get riled up. “Do your parents know you’re here? Kids shouldn’t be out this late.”

“I’m not a fucking kid, I’m in uni,” he defends, “Do you know where Y/N is? I need to talk to her.”

Deciding fuck it, you open the door by an inch, just enough to peek. As expected, Megumi is glaring behind Sukuna’s shoulders in search of you. Meanwhile, Sukuna’s completely calm, checking his nails boredly as if Megumi isn’t fuming in front of him. And boy, do you know how much Megumi hates being ignored. “Oh, I think she went out, I don’t know why though. House was empty when I got here.”

“She didn’t tell you where she was going?”

At Megumi’s imposing tone, Sukuna tilts his head to scrutinize Megumi. Now that you’re seeing them together, Sukuna’s twice the size of Megs, their height and shoulder width too different to start comparing. But knowing Megumi, he’s not going to back down from a tattooed guy twice his size, not even as he sarcastically remarks, “Ain’t you her friend? She should be telling you that kind of stuff.”

Truthfully, you expected he would put up more of a fight. The two of them share a heated staring competition before Megumi scoffs, the first one to look away. “Whatever,” he dismisses, “Tell her to pick her damn phone up. I’ve been calling for the past hour.”

“I think I should tell her to get better friends.”

“What was that?”

“I said get home safely,” Sukuna chirps. Even with his back turned to you, you could tell Sukuna’s just further pressing his buttons with a grin that’s not meant to be inviting at all. Just when you think it’s done, however, Sukuna finishes off with, “Kid.”

Megumi rages. His blue eyes flame into something feral, his fists balled at his sides. He’s always had a temper issue and you nearly reveal yourself to stop whatever fight is about to ensue, but Sukuna’s already closing the door, ridding any opportunity for the younger one to retaliate. At the sound of the door closing, Sukuna leans against the door, his smile still plastered on his face as if he knows you’re watching the whole time. He meets your eyes from the slight peep of his door, waving his hands sarcastically.

“Sukuna, you didn’t have to be so mean.”

“Sorry,” he isn’t apologetic at all. “Next time I’ll be nicer to your asshole crushes,” he adds with a slight roll of his eyes and you punch his chest playfully. You don’t stop him from grabbing your wrists to embrace you in a hug that doesn’t seem so platonic – but not so suggestive either. Sukuna rests his chin on top of your hand while he sways you both side to side, his voice muffled in your hair. “I understand why you’re attracted to him though. He’s really handsome.”

“Yeah, he is,” you agree sadly, thinking of how much it’s really all a waste Megumi has to be like that. “Just sucks his personality ruins everything.”

“A pretty face is always deceiving,” Sukuna suddenly pulls away and holds you an arm’s length away.  “Hey, want to have early breakfast?”

“I think that would be late dinner,” you frown at him.

“Whatever, food is food,” he responds rather excitedly, and you watch as Sukuna rummages through the fridge. Now that you think about it, having sex so much really took a toll on you, and your stomach grumbles loudly. Sukuna hides his chuckles through the fridge but you hear him anyway, shouting at him that you’re not hungry. “Wasn’t asking, sweetheart. Now go get cleaned and changed, I’ll make something for you.”

If anyone were to tell you that a good fucking is all that’s needed for you to immediately form a new kind of friendship with your roommate, you’d call them weird. Sukuna isn’t necessarily out of reach, you and him just simply didn’t cross paths.

But now, you’re dressed comfortably in his boxers and the oversized shirt you stole from him, eating the slightly burn cheese sandwich he’s made, sharing conversation and laughing with him like you’ve been doing it for such a long time. Your sandwich is actually half forgotten on the plate as you whack your palms on the counter, “That’s how you and Prof Gojo met? I never would’ve expected you guys fought over a girl!”

“He was fucking annoying in high school,” Sukuna grumbles over an angry bite, “He was getting all the girls that when someone confessed to me, the hottest chick, no less, he straight up punched me in the face,” you laugh as you imagine the memory of a younger, already rebellious looking Sukuna getting smacked by the even more intolerable Gojo Satoru. Sukuna is lost in his own memories as well, shaking his head from around the last bites of his bread. It’s clear he hates the burnt crust judging from the way he turns a little green, but he’s bragged about his cooking skills so proudly that he has to save face in front of you. “Ah, such good times,” he muses before wincing at his own words, dropping his bread in disgust. “Damn, I sound old, don’t I?”

“You’re only like, five years older than me, it’s fine,” you giggle, “I like the maturity that comes with older people. You’re a lot easier to be with than guys my age.”

“Please,” Sukuna smirks, “Just say you like fucking older men. I won’t judge.”

If anyone were to tell you that you would be jumping over the counter to strangle your roommate who’s now running like hell, your laughter bursting through the once silent apartment, you would call them a liar. But now, you and Sukuna are panting on the floor, too tired from sprinting all around before calling it quits. Maybe it’s a lie – maybe this connection will never really be that much of a big deal – but as long as this lie and play pretend of friendship lasts, you’ll just enjoy every sweet moment of it.

taglist (lmk if you want to be added/removed) (bold can’t be tagged) @uwubby-1 @expectoscamander @your-consulting-fangirl @dora-the-grownup @cosmotoic @charlie-xo @kittaliapenn @sukunas-cult-leader @flowersgirl02 @cloudsinthecosmos @90s-belladonna @averysheart-raleighsdick @generousstudentpsychic-bat @kat-su-ki @issamomma​ 

[youresog0lden]

Last Thing I Do II Spencer Reid

Summary: SSA Davis has found her sister shot in front of her by her sisters stalker. When her best friend is left pick up the pieces just like she did for him. 

Warning: Cursing, Drug Mentions, Guns, Shooting, Blood. Very sad, Angst 

This story is very similar to Maeve’s story. I completely made up the scene where they try and catch the unsub. 

WC: 2.4k 

I used a real name because it was easier to write feel free to change the name !!

masterlist

I DO NOT OWN THE GIFS I USED !

"SSA Davis," I spoke confidently on the phone.

"Yes I understand." I say. I walk out of my office and into the meeting room.

"No time to get comfortable. This is huge." Garcia said turning on her remote.

"Three Murders in the past two nights."

"A mom and son and a younger man?" Reid questioned.

"Yes."

"Okay they need us in Atlanta Georgia. Wheels up in 30." I sigh.

"Are we ever going to get a break." JJ sighs. I shake my head no before going to my office. I sit in there for a second my head spinning a little bit. I hear a soft knock at my door.

"Yeah." I say. Spencer steps in.

"Hey what's up." I say

"Can I ask you a question?" he asks.

"You just did." I laugh. He rolls his eyes.

"No but for real what do you need?" I ask

"There was three different drugs found in the bodies. A drug for each person. What do you think that could me?" he asks.

"They're probably a sadist. Who somehow has a connection to drugs." I say.

"I get that but how would all of them get the types of drugs into them without a prescription. Besides LSD." he said

"I don't know but we'll figure it out." I say softly rubbing a hand on his arm. He nods.

"Let's go." I say we both grab our to-go bag's and head out onto the plane. We sit down on the plane only having to be on there for an maybe twenty minutes all of us decide to just sit quite and do our own thing. Ever since Hotch left to spend more time being a dad and I was put in charge I've always felt different. I don't like being in this high authority but I promised Hotch I would keep this team on track. Ring. I look down at the contact. Amber is calling,

"Hey I'm on the plane I'll text you later. Love ya." I send the text and turn off my phone. We land all of us heading to the cars. Driving down to the police station. I walk in there.

"Hello, I'm SSA Davis, These are agents Rossi, Morgan, Jareau, Prentiss, and Dr. Reid." all of them shake hands with the Sheriff except Spence. He just nods shoving his hands in his pockets.

"Okay. We have all the files Garcia asked for on a table and a conference room set up. If you need anything don't be afraid to ask." we all nod.

"Okay JJ, Morgan ya'll go to the the house of where the last murder took place. Prentiss and Rossi, ya'll talk to the witnesses and families. Reid and I will go down and get the autopsy report's and examine the body." I say we all split up. I give Spencer the keys as we drive. I feel a vibration from my pocket. I pull my phone out to see my sister calling again. I hit decline deciding to call her tonight. We pull up at the morgue. I look at my notebook making sure I have a pen to take notes.

"Who still takes notes." Reid teases.

"Not all of us have an eidetic memory." I ruffle his hair. He let's out a huff before laughing.

"SSA Davis?" the autopsy technicians asks.

"Yes."

"Okay well in the mom there we severe levels of a date rape drug called Rohypnol in her body."

"Rohypnol also knows as Forget-me pill, R2, and Roofies is a pill some versions of it turns blue when added to liquid but other forms have no color when added to liquid." Spencer states.

"So she was roofied. Did she have an alcohol in her system? Maybe she got it at a bar and the unsub followed her home."

"No there we're nothing but water and rohypnol found in her body."

"Any food?"

"No."

"What about the-" I was cut off by my ringer going off. I shut it off again.

"Sorry about that. What about the boy?"

"He was a teen there we're high levels of Phencyclidine found in his system."

"It creates numbness of the legs and arm areas so he can't move."

"Yes, we think this was a really well though out plan to this because there was no way that this could've just happened randomly." I nod.

"What about the other one. We we're told high levels of LSD were found. So was he drugged when he died or was he coming off the high?" Spencer asked.

"We looked but couldn't really tell. But we made an educated guess and are saying that it was already in his system maybe to get him where they wanted him."

"They?"

"There's no way that only one person could do this. It had to be a team." she says. I nod.

"Thank you for you're time. If you have any more evidence please give us a call." I give her my card and she nods. We walk out and sit in the car.

"So they we're drugged before they could get away. Kept there for a day or two given water but no food and then brutally murdered. They are definitely a sadist." Reid says I nod.

"Let's go Morgan says the father of the kids are there."

"Father as singular."

"Yes apparently he is the father of both kids. Different moms." I say. He nods speeding off. We make it to the precinct. Spence and I walk into the interrogation room.

"John Hunter." I shake his hand.

"Why am I in here I didn't do anything." he pleaded.

"We needed you to be somewhere where there were not many people." he nods.

"Do you know who these three people are?" Reid asked.

"Yes that's my wife and sons." okay.

"Who are these two people." I ask.

"That's my ex-wife and son."

"Why isn't you're son with you in these photos. But you're youngest with you're first wife is."

"He was mentally ill. They had to take him away when me and my first wife Rose got a divorce he tired to kill his brother. Drowning him in a bathtub. He was sick." I nod.

"Can you give me his name." I ask

"Jack Hunter." he says. I nod and walk out. Dialing Garcia.

"Goddess of Everything Computer Related how may I help you."

"Hey can you do a background search on Jack Hunter and when he was released form a mental hospital. "

"Yes ma'am." she says,

"Okay so he was released from St. Claire's Mental Instantiation two weeks before the first murder."

"What about his mom?"

"Rose Strut she was given... you'll never guess."

"What."

"Phencyclidine"

"God I love you Garcia." I hang up seeing four missed call from my sister in the past twenty minutes. Reid walks out.

"It's time to give the profile." I said.

----

"We are looking for Jack Hunter and Rose Strut. They we're last seen two miles south of the Savannah River." I said.

"They could possibly be armed so if you are to see them do not go up to them. They will not be afraid to kill at this point." Emily said.

"If you do see them at any point. Please call the police and get away fast." Morgan finished. I hear my ringer again.

"Hey Garcia what's up."

"You'll never guess who's phone just pinged at a cell phone tower five minutes away,"

"Send the address." I circle my fingers telling everyone to load up.

---

Jack and Rose we're now being put into life in prison without the possibility of parole. We we're all getting off the plane when my phone goes off.

"Ash. "

"Hey Amber . What's up."

"She's back help-" before she said anything else I heard screaming.

"AMBER" I yell into my phone.

"AMBER." I yell again. Everyone looking at me. They put the stairs down. I grab my bag running down.

"Davis." I hear my team yell. I race to my car unlocking it. I start the car as fast as I can driving away. I'd be at Amber's house in a matter of minutes but realizing I wasn’t going fast enough I turn on my lights speeding down the high way. I finally pull onto her street. I stop at her drive way running up my gun sitting in my hand. I try opening the  door but its locked, I kicked in the door.  Looking all around before sighing. I heard a muffled scream come from the front yard so I run out the door as quick as I can seeing her. Holding a gun to Amber’s head. I must have forgotten my head set was on because I could hear the team yelling for me through it.

"Don't you come any closer or I will kill her."

"Please you don't have to do this." I begged.

"You killed my mom. I think it's only fair." she laughs. I take a step forward.

"Stop fucking moving." she yelled. I held my hand up my gun still in my hands.

"Drop your gun." she said. I drop my gun. She looks at me again and laughs,

"See I'm going to kill her either way but now you're just defenseless." she laughs. It was almost to fast to happen. A ring came into my ear's and I see her drop to the ground.

"AMBER." I called out

Blood spilling out of her head. I don't know if something kicked in my I grab my gun out of my leg canister and pull the trigger.  

"Oh hun. I'm not that easy to kill." she picks up her gun. Before shooting one last shot hitting me in my arm. I hissed in pain.

"I will kill you if it's the last thing I do. Weather I actually kill you are watch you fall apart mentally I will watch you suffer." she laughs falling to the ground. I see the lights flooding around us. I drop to my knees crying.

"Amber." I say softly. I put her limp body in my lap. I stroke the hair out of her face kissing her forehead. I see my team moving out of there cars. Kiera being taken away into cuffs. At this point all I'm doing is crying. I feel someones arms around me as they pick up my sister. I try to fight back but its inevitably not worth it. I'm covered in her blood. I turn around to see Spencer's arms around me.  I almost fall in them crying.

"Come on. We need to get you're arm looked at." We walk to the ambulance. I sit on the edge having them tear into my shirt cleaning up the barley scraped skin. I start staring into the space. Until. I grab Spencer's arm looking into his eyes.

"She has a kid. Where's Blake." I said softly.

"We'll find him. Right now you have to go to the hospital. I'll  come with you okay." he says just as softly.

"Okay."

----

They say it's always the hardest after. But what's hardest was telling my mom that it could've been me not her or that she would still be alive if I didn't move. Her funerals today. But a part of me can't go. This is my fault. I can almost hear my parents saying it to me but, none the less I still go. They found Blake and Tom her husband. They we're on out at a movie. Amber had to stay home for work. They don't blame me. They tried to tell me that I couldn't stop it even if I tried. Blake isn't old enough to understand what it means yet but he'll get there one day.

---

The funeral is over. I'm sitting in my tiny apartment surrounded by my feelings. My team couldn't be here. They were needed somewhere else. Even though Spence did offer to stay with me.

~ Flashback ~

"Spence." I called out.

"Spence I'm not leaving so please let me in." I say. I hear the door's locks come undone. He opens the door. He's standing there in a t-shirt, a cardigan, and a pair of pants, his hair was a mess, his eyes were puff, and he had bags under his eyes.

"Spence." I pull him into a hug. He wraps his arms around me crying into my shoulder.

"I couldn't do anything about it." he cries harder.

"Pretty boy, listen. It's not your fault. As much as I hate to say it. Diane already knew what she was going to do. Baby you couldn't stop that." I said softly. He just cry's.

"Can I come in?" he nods. I grab his hand he shuts and locks the door. I walk to his bed and lay down opening my arms. He cuddles into them laying his head on my chest.

"Go to sleep kid. I'll be right here when ever you need me."  I look at him. I kiss his forehead before putting my hand in his hair.

"I'll always be here for you." I said softly. His grip around my waist got tighter.

~ End of Flashback ~

I stood there a picture of us hung on the wall.

"I'm sorry." I said softly.

"Ash." I hear Spencer's voice call out. It startled me so i let out a yelp.

"Ash let me in please." I couldn't move. I hear keys jiggle and I see the door nob turn. Fuck why'd I have to give him a key.

"Ash." he says softly looking at me. He looked at me head to toe. I was wearing a pair of sweatpants and some how his 'Caletech' shirt. He sets his stuff on my counter and looks at me. I walk over to him standing in front of him. I let a tear drip down my cheek. He wraps his arms around me. I start sobbing in his chest.

"Why are you here..." I ask looking into his eyes. He placed a kiss on my forehead. His hands on both sides of my face.

"Because you we're here day after day when Maeve was killed so I will be here day by day until you are okay. because I love you. I love you more than anything." he says softly. I look into his eyes they were glistening with hope

"You love me?" I ask.

"Of course I do. I've loved you since day you offered to help me through everything you stuck by my side through everything, all my stupid little lectures, my rants, and facts. You're one of a kind." he said. I look up at him one more time. I lean forward into his lips. Melting together like butter.

"I love you too." he smiles and kisses me again.

"Let's go lay down." he says I nod.

“Everything will be okay” he whispers in your ear

[softtofustew]

an odyssey | afterword

rating: T

pairing: Hwang Hyunjin/Han Jisung

summary: Somewhere in the galaxy of the Stella Primum, Lieutenant Han is the best fighter on his team, a real ace shooter, with five gold stars to show. Too bad Second Lieutenant Hwang is not only great at battling the Ordinem, he’s also got disgustingly perfect looks to match, and now Jisung’s stuck in the same spaceship with him for possibly the most impossible task of their lives. Or the one where a rivalry is brewed across the skies and stars, until Jisung realises what there is to flying beside Hyunjin on a mission to save the galaxy.

if you haven’t read it yet, read here.

this is an afterword to ‘an odyssey’, where i write about the origin of the story, the characters, and my struggles of writing :’)

(i) The Origin

I’ve had this work in my WIPs since, believe it or not, January of this year. I’ve had this idea for so, so long. I wrote it intermittently throughout this year, with a scene or two in September, then October. 

Due to my exams, though, I couldn’t write as much as I wanted to. That’s why I only really started writing ‘an odyssey’ back in mid-November. The good thing was that I had more time to plan this out, because frankly, this is perhaps the heaviest fic I’ve written in terms of plot so far. 

I can’t for the life of me remember where this story idea planted itself in my head. All I knew was that I like space AUs, I adore Hyunjin and Jisung’s friendship, and I love enemies to lovers. Realising there weren’t any fics out there that combined the three, I knew it was my time to shine. Or something. 

(ii) The Plot

The plot was the trickiest to pull off. I’ve written an urban fantasy here and there, but I’m pretty sure if I reread them thoroughly, I’m bound to find a couple of plot holes. 

There were a lot of elements to cover: the Prophecy. The five gems. The push-pull relationship between Jisung and Hyunjin. The journey to discovering the whereabouts of the last Gemma. The last boss fight with a Governor who could wield the Force. There was!!!! So!!!! Much!!!! Going!!!! On!!!!!

Perhaps if I reread ‘an odyssey’, I might find another plot hole or two; who knows? For now, though, I feel quite contented with this work of mine. Considering it’s my first time writing something as long as this (50K+ are you kidding me?), I feel this is a first step for me to continue expanding my horizons when it comes to writing, to continue to challenge myself to write something different, something bold. Something new.

(iii) The Characters

I rewatched the Two Kids Room and One Kid Room episodes so many times, over and over again. There’s a reason why this story is centred around Jisung and Hyunjin, and why it’s written from Jisung’s perspective.

Their relationship is, after all, something coherently interesting. They really said “enemies to friends but make it irl”. I guess I took that concept and sort of exaggerated the extent of their ‘hate’ for each other, which isn’t exactly hate to begin with. The further you read on, the more you’ll realise that they don’t exactly hate each other — they just got off on the wrong footing, and have never tried turning back to start over once more.

It’s written from Jisung’s perspective because personally, I wanted the story to be told from the eyes of someone who was prideful, who was eager and determined, and who wanted to show his worth to everyone else. I feel like perhaps I didn’t expand on characterising Jisung to the fullest advantage possible, though, which remains a slight regret of mine. 

Another reason why I wanted this to be written from Jisung’s POV is because we can find out how Jisung feels about Hyunjin throughout the story. When he realises whose son Hyunjin is, he’s torn between wanting to pity Hyunjin and keeping things between them the same as they always have. (If I were in his position, though, I don’t know what I would have done lol.) It was hard to try and interpret his emotions, but there’s that.

Someone commented once asking if we’d ever get Hyunjin’s POV. Sadly, one of my biggest turn-offs is the switching of POVs in stories when it’s not entirely necessary haha. As much as I would want to know what Hyunjin is thinking when they’re arguing, or when they’re fighting, I like to keep on the suspension line. It gives you the feeling of immersing yourself as the Jisung in the story, of only seeing things from one perspective. 

As for the other characters, there wasn’t enough time to expand on all of them (for example, I mentioned Seungmin several times throughout the story, but really, he speaks only once haha). And as your fellow StayDay, it was definitely fun for me to include a few members of Day6. (please don’t ask me why I thought of ‘PJ and Honey’ while writing. I was probably hungry.)

I don’t know if I’ll continue to expand on the characters in this same universe, but it would be fun to think of the other relationships, for example Chan and Felix, or Changbin with Minho and Seungmin. (someone please save the seungbinho tag!!!!!!)

As far as characterisation goes, I’ve still got so much to learn. For now, though, I hope you enjoyed the dynamics between the characters and how Jisung and Hyunjin learnt to grow within a span of six chapters.

(iv) The Writing Process

Granted, the writing bit was a little easier in the beginning, but as I delved myself deeper into the story, I found it harder and harder to express the emotions I wanted to deliver in the story. One of the hardest chapters for me to write by far was the last chapter. I wrote two versions of the last chapter, simply because I felt the first version was too lacklustre for the ending of such a long story haha.

I had a clear outline of my story, but I did end up extending it from the initial 5 chapters to 6. For the first time, though, I didn’t add any random elements to the story, unlike how i wrote this story last year haha. The lesson I’ve learnt is that I should ALWAYS have a brief outline of the plot — detailed enough to cover the entire story, but brief enough to give me some creative freedom mid-writing.

The excitement of writing honestly wore off near the last few chapters. I’ve realised the importance of reading unfinished works in this way. Writers really need some form of motivation to keep them writing their chaptered works. So if you’re one of the real ones who started reading this even before it was completed, kudos to you. I really appreciate it.

Overall, writing this was fun. Hopefully I don’t need to do this again though; I absolutely hate writing chaptered fics because of all the time and effort put into them. I’d much rather be a ‘One-Shot Hotshot’ lol.

(v) The End (?)

I left a bit of wondering for the readers in the last chapter. If Atkins was able to wield the Force despite the false pretence that there was no longer any Force-wielders left in the universe, how many more of them could there be? 

That leaves an opening for me if I ever wish to return to this alternate universe sometime in the future. The Universe is ever-expanding, and so is our imagination.

(vi) The Inspiration

Obviously, I need to thank Star Wars. I also need to apologise because I absolutely butchered their universe. Fun fact: there was one huge plot hole I had to cover up halfway through writing. 

If you’re observant, you might remember the scene where Hyunjin asks Jisung why they didn’t just jump into hyperspace to reach Ilsanis. That’s because I was watching an episode of The Mandalorian where the Mando was forced to fly a ship without a hyperdrive engine, and I almost freaked out right there in the middle of the living room realising how weird that would be if I left the issue unattended in my own work (yikes). 

Long story short, I drew elements from the Star Wars universe and created a story of my own. I’ve been asked how I came up with the idea of the Prophecy. Frankly, I don’t know. My brain farts sometimes, I guess. Brain Farts = weird ideas that somehow make sense sometimes.

(vii) Lastly

If you have any more questions you’d like to ask (or plot holes to tell me about *shudders*), do leave me a question in my CC, or holler at me on Twitter (I’m hardly alive here on Tumblr haha). To anyone and everyone who has read ‘an odyssey’, I thank you.

This year has been a funky year, and even worse, it’s the year I had to take my IGCSEs. Writing has always been a way for me to create my own universe and release my tension and emotions, so not being able to write as much as I used to was a little tough. 

Writing will continue to be a medium for me to express my emotions and my thoughts while creating stories of my own, so simply by giving my fics a read, you’ve already fuelled my reason to continue to write. Thank you for all the support in ‘an odyssey’! 

(why did i write this entire monologue like i’m giving a speech at the Oscars or something lol im so dramatic :”))

[unsettledink]

(Part two of looking back at the fandoms I was in and the fics I wrote in 2020)

(Part one here.)

*

Most popular story:

    By Kudos (and comments), Seiche : By hits, Indefensible : On tumblr, Pocket Change

Story you wish was more successful:

    Well, that’s kind of the curse of writing rare pairs. I want anything with Tony/Quentin or Peter/Quentin to be more successful, lol. Defining the feeling of success in fandoms/pairings like that is tricky, because— do I wish they’d gotten more attention? Of course! Do I consider them fairly successful because they got any attention? Yeah, kinda.

Something like Intent got very little response, but considering the size and age of the fandom, it actually felt successful to get any response?

The entire Old Adages series I really wish had found an audience; I’m very fond of it, and it’s… softer than I usually write? The filthy smutty kinky stuff always outpreforms anything else, and that sort of thing feels easy for me. And I’m extrapolating a lot for young Quentin’s characterization, so I’m a little insecure about that as well.

Most "Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story:

    You know, there are several stories I feel like should be that? But let’s be honest, considering what I’ve written in the past, they’re not that bad. 

    So I’m going to have to go with Creepy Crawly. I mean, I get squicked a little if I read it in the wrong mindset. SPIDERS D:

Hardest story to write:

    Causality. I just… could not quite connect somehow. I had the image in my head fine, but when I went to write it I felt pretty meh. I think I hadn’t done much (any?)Peter POV at that point, so that was a stretch. And I think I’d been spending so much time in the world of Gotcha that any other version of Peter/Quentin felt strange. I got it done, I have a sequel planned, but it was a struggle.

    No Lies was also tricky. I picked the prompt ‘make-up’ because I had this crystal clear mental image of someone kneeling, crying, makeup smeared all over them. But I didn’t know WHO. I tried so many pairings and characters, and even when I figured out that I really wanted that to be Tony… who with? Could I actually make Peter behaving that way believable?? Once I got it sorted out the writing was easy, but getting there - gah.

Easiest story to write:

    Indefensible was bizarre to write, because it literally just arrived in my brain in one giant chunk, complete, and I just had to transcribe it over a day or two. Very odd. 

    Pocket Change was much the same. The idea appeared and that first image of Tony holding the bill was just… there. The rest of it fell into place so easily as I went along.

Most fun story to write:

    Just a Bite was a lot of fun to write. It’s a topic I enjoy anyway, and I like trying to focus in on one element like that. Peter discovering a new thing he liiiiikes is always a ton of fun.

    11:59 was also surprisingly fun? Like— three characters that have interesting dialogue patterns, a slightly darker Tony, being able to indulge in nasty Quentin without him being quite a villain, the constant shifting of emotions for everyone in the room. Just so much going on in small ways. There are totally at least three more fics set in that universe. 

What’s your personal favorite thing you wrote this year?

    Tough call, but probably A Perfect Fit. Really, the entire insane little universe that’s expanding into. Definitely not something I would have expected at ALL back in January. 

What’s your least favorite thing you wrote this year?

    Maybe Can’t, Wont? Idk. I didn’t have a strong enough idea for the prompt to really make something of it, I guess. And writing Peter/Quentin is kind of difficult at the moment. It feels weird because I’ve spent so much time in the world of Gotcha that other takes on the characters are odd.

If you could go back and change something about one of the fics you wrote this year, what would it be?

    Probably Want What I Want. I knew what I wanted and I just couldn’t quite make it function. So I went with a slantwise version of it - which isn’t bad, but doesn’t have the focus I wanted it to. It felt like more of a twist on the prompt than I wanted. I’d like to go back and expand it out, dig into the specifics of the prompt a little more.

    And tbh, I got a comment on that very point. I’m normally really good about letting go of comments? But it was something I’d questioned myself, so it stuck more.

Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters:

    (Just) Waiting Around? Maybe? As much as I love top/experienced!Peter, I had to sit down and figure out how I might be able to actually get him there, convince the reader that this was a Peter that current Peter could become. 

    And any of the Tony/Quentin fics. There’s not a lot given for Quentin in canon; taking those little bits and trying to follow them back to these younger version of Quentin was really interesting and difficult. How do I make this character the softer, more open, more vulnerable, less confident version of himself from 10/15 years ago, and still keep those sharper edges that will grow and take over? How do I make the reader believe both that this version could have existed and that version could actually become the canon one? 

Story that was most different from what you usually write:

    I mean, Relief? I’ve never written het before (and probably never will again, lol), but I wasn’t going to let the chance to write redwings pass me by. 

    In general, all the freaking ABO. Which I’d never written before this fandom, though I’ve read tons of it. Not something I really expected to write? And then suddenly I’m not just writing it, I can’t seem to stop. 

    Sustain felt pretty different, and it took me a moment to figure out why (don’t laugh at me!). I’ve never written straight up non-sexual kink before. Not just a kink scene that doesn’t have sex, but a kink scene that doesn’t even have the intention or desire for sex. Completely removing that additional layer of tension and complications is fascinating. I’m really interested in expanding that verse.

Most unintentionally telling story:

    Oh, other than Gotcha, lol? Um. I don’t know if any really are? Maybe Backhand, or Sustain. Hmm, maybe Getting Started, though it’s not finished. 

    Now I wonder what conclusions those have people drawing.

What’s your favorite piece of description or narration?

    Oh my god, what an impossible question. Uh. This is difficult because I… think of images in words? I feel very odd about the bits I picked, Idk. 

    It’s so small, and I don’t know if I captured it as well as it is in my head, but I come back to it so often:

Stark sits on the bed, and then seems to get lost, or distracted, not moving again until Phil pushes him gently towards the middle of the bed. He gets Stark curled up on his side, just a sliver of his back touching the sheets.

There's a chair against the wall that doesn't look too modern, so hopefully more comfortable than most of the monstrosities around here; Phil has a feeling he's going to be here a while, watching Stark come back up. He stands, about to walk away when there's a soft touch on his hand. He looks down.

Stark's arm is stretched out, his fingers just barely resting on the back of Phil's hand. He's looking up at Phil out of the corner of his eyes, head just barely turned towards him. It's a clear a request as anything spoken; stay.

"I'm not leaving," Phil tells him. "I'm not even leaving the room. I was just going to get a chair.'

There's a breath, a hesitation, Stark's hand not leaving his, and then it's gone, Stark dragging it back in, turning his face into the pillow. That was the wrong response, something about it was just... wrong.

"Stark," Phil says, leaning onto the bed. "Do you want me to stay here? On the bed? I wasn't sure you'd be comfortable with that." After all, this doesn't seem to be at all sexual for him.

Stark doesn't say anything—Phil's not entirely sure if he's nonverbal or not—but he turns his face back towards Phil a little. Doesn't quite look at him, and doesn't make a move; he's not going to ask again, not after what he obviously took as a rejection. His reactions are odd, not much like Phil had expected. 

    - Sustain

Or:

Beck gets Peter turned around, still kneeling but settled back against Beck's legs, leaning into it. "Toss me his shirt," he says, and Tony throws it at his face, Beck managing to catch it before it connects. Laughs, like this is fucking funny. He slips his hand into Peter's hair and tugs his head back a bit, wiping the come off his face.

"Take five, baby," Beck says, and Peter hums, resting his head on Beck's thigh and staring at Tony. Beck's petting him, hand sliding slowly though Peter's hair, and it's a fucking nightmare that Beck knows what that feels like and Tony doesn't. "You see?" Beck says. "He likes it a little rough. A lot rough, sometimes, so don't worry about hurting him. Don't worry when he cries," and Tony glares at him.

Beck's looking down at Peter, though, and then Tony is too. He's turning red again as Beck talks, but he's not denying anything, and not looking away from Tony.

Beck's hand trails down Peter's neck, hooks around the front and pulls him back; Peter's head tips back, exposing the whole of his throat to Beck's hand. "He's a little embarrassed by it," Beck says, "but he's an awfully sweet submissive too. Aren't you, honey?"

Peter looks up at him, his expression soft, open. "Yes, sir," he says, and Jesus Christ, Tony had no idea how much he wants Peter to say that to him. Peter likes it too, not just giving it lip service judging by the way his cock is getting hard again. Beck smiles.

"I'm going to miss you," he says. "You've been a lot of fun, baby." He looks up, catching Tony's eye, a smirk growing slowly on his face. "Guess I'd better make sure the last time makes up for it."

     - 11:59

What’s your favorite piece of dialogue you wrote this year?

I mean, I’m very fond of Hang Up, it’s like 85% dialogue.

Alternatively:

"Looks like you're finally ready to be fucked," Tony says. "Bets on if you'll come on my cock, or if I'll have to give you a reach around with this?" settling the gauntlet on Quentin's hip.

"No," Quentin says, shaking his head as much as he can manage, "no, no, Tony—"

Tony leans in, thighs pushing Quentin's legs apart, the head of his cock bumping up against Quentin's ass. "If you manage it just once without my hand," he whispers, ducking his head and rubbing his beard over Quentin's shoulder, "I'll fund every last thing you ask for."

"No," Quentin moans, because he can't.

"Don't worry, sweetheart," Tony says. "I'll make sure you can."

    - Make Sure

Story with the single sexiest moment:

    AHHHHHHHHH fuck this is the hardest one. 

    Secondhand and Gift Wrapped both have some of the hottest moments, I think:

    Peter's so hard he can barely think, absolutely can't control the way his dick jumps in Quentin's hand. He doesn't want to hear about this, doesn't want to imagine Tony with Quentin at all. Doesn't want Quentin to stop.

Quentin kicks off his pants and then he's crawling up over Peter, staring down at him with that manic glint in his eyes that Peter knows well enough by now to worry about. "He fucked my face like that," Quentin says, watching him. "Kept babbling that shit and fucked my throat nearly raw. Can't you hear it, honey?" and Peter can, he can.

"Can't you imagine it?" Quentin asks, and Peter can.

    - Secondhand

And:

    Peter wants— he curls his fingers in Tony's hair and yanks, Tony's head hanging loosely from his hands. He looks wrecked, sweaty and his whole face is dark, his lips wet and red and puffy, all from Peter's cock. When he opens his eyes, it's like he's not even seeing Peter, completely lost in his own little world; he's stiffening slowly, his spine rounding and he tries to brace himself, his eyes going wider and his breath getting shorter and— and is he about to come, Peter wonders. Is he really going to come just like this, from being fucked like this?

He is, he totally fucking is because a moment later Tony stops breathing entirely, his head jerking hard against Peter's hold, his whole body jerking as he comes. He gasps, eyelashes fluttering, and Peter can feel Tony's come landing on his legs, holy shit.

Pepper eases her thrusts, sinking into Tony and just rocking against him while he comes. Waits until he's gone limp, sunk down even more between her hands and Peter's; "Peter," she says. "Get a good grip on him for me. He gets all wiggly afterwards and I'm not done."

    - Gift Wrapped

    But if it comes down to what is probably my favorite - 

    Peter had already been pretty out of it when Tony came back, already wound up and just existing, no thoughts and no worries, nothing but want and feeling and response. He’d already been awfully close to flying, and this— this drops him over the edge, completely. 

Some part of his head is aware of the way he’s thrusting up into Tony’s mouth, Tony taking it happily, drooling around him; is aware that Peter’s tossing his head back and forth, fighting against Rhodey’s tight grip on his hair, only making it worse with every yank. Is even a little aware that the others must be watching him, watching them, watching just like Rhodey’s looking down at him, Tony looking up, their gaze so heavy on Peter he can feel it, just like he can feel everything, every touch and every texture and every single spot his body is in contact with anything. Can feel everything, too much, overwhelming, amazing, and he doesn’t know if it’s that, or the pain of Rhodey’s grasp, or the wave crashing down on him as he comes that have him crying. Maybe it’s all of them, or maybe it’s just that he’s wanted like this, kept and held and wanted. 

Rhodey kisses him, gently, and Tony crawls up over him; kisses Rhodey and kisses Peter and Peter could stay just like this forever. He can see Tony’s mouth moving, talking to him, then Rhodey, then him again, but his head is full of nothing but static, white noise.

    - Flaunt

    (So, uh, what does it say that all of those are threesomes?)

*

Stories I haven't yet written, but intend to:

    SO MANY. Beyond the fics I’ve got going for other people and Gotcha, and the (hopefully) one off continuations of kinktober fics, I really want to focus on - 

    The rest of Deep End (I know it all exactly!)

    The sad AI Peter/Tony, real!Peter/Tony

    Branches of Aegis

    ONE of my longer ABO pieces. 

    Fluffuary & Kinktober, again. 

Fingers crossed. I don’t even want to think about how many more ideas will come creeping in.

[introvertguide]

King Kong (1933); AFI #41

The latest movie for review was the one and only creature feature on the AFI top 100 list, the iconic Kong Kong (1933). This was the equivalent of a blockbuster for the time as it was first presented at Radio City Music Hall for 4 days and all shows were sold out. The film incorporated layering technology that had never been utilized before, which I assume made the experience of watching in a 9,000 attendance capacity crowd on a 30 foot screen an amazing experience. The film did not win any awards, but has since been recognized as a defining film for special effects in Old Hollywood. I was able to track down a version of the movie with commentary by Ray Harryhausen and I want to discuss what was revealed about the film production, but we should do a quick summary of the film first. I will not go into too much detail since the film has been remade three times now and most everybody knows the story, but I still need to do the standard...

SPOILER WARNING!!!! I AM GOING TO GIVE AWAY THE PLOT OF A MOVIE THAT IS 90 YEARS OLD AND HAS BEEN REMADE TWICE!!! IT WON’T EVEN BE THAT IN DEPTH, BUT I GET IN TROUBLE IF I DON’T SAY SOMETHING ABOUT SPOILERS!!! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!!

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The film starts out with a movie director named Carl Denham (Robert Armstrong) who is looking to discover an actress. He has a map to a secret island and he wants to shoot a film there. He hired a ship with a crew and his producer has secured a camera, but an actress is still needed. Denham scours the streets looking for a pretty new face that is desperate enough to not ask questions. He quickly discovers Ann Darrow (Fay Wray) as she is trying to steal an apple from an apple cart. He pays for her, gives her some food, and whisks her away on the boat.

On the ship, it is revealed that only Denham knows where they are going. He has a hand drawn map to a place called Skull Island where there is a giant wall that contains a world of monsters. Ann Darrow falls in love with the first mate, Jack Driscoll (Bruce Cabot), by the time boat makes it to the island. A large group goes ashore and they run into natives in front of a huge wall with a giant door. There seemed to be some sort of ceremony involving the sacrifice of a young girl, but that changes when the natives see Ann and they want to take her for their ceremony. The group from the boat decides it is a good idea to get off the island, so they row back to the ship. In the night, a group of natives spirit away Ann and her absence is quickly noticed. 

Fires and celebration light up the sky and the crew figures out that the natives stole their actress. The tribe is then shown opening up the giant door, tying Ann to some rocks inside the enclosure, closing the doors leaving her alone, and then hitting a gong to summon the beast.  The sailors all run up on the natives right as Kong appears and takes away Ann. The group including Denham and Driscoll open the door and half the group chases after Kong deep into the enclosure. 

All of the men who go inside are slowly picked off by either Kong or dinosaurs that live in the enclosure, which turns out to be somewhat of a Jurassic jungle. Kong has to constantly fight off beasts that want to steal Ann from him including an allosaur, pterodactyls, and what appears to be the Loch Ness monster. With the constant barrage of predators, the chase team of sailors is whittled down to just Driscoll and Denham. Denham goes back to the gate and Driscoll goes after Ann. During one of Kong’s monster distractions, Driscoll is able to steal Ann and they flee back to the gate with Kong following behind. Everyone gets out of the enclosure successfully, but Kong is so mad he breaks down the gate and wreaks havoc on the native village killing many. Our three main characters and a few of the sailors that stayed behind to guard the gate run back to the boats with Kong following, but Denham is able to throw a gas bomb in the face of the giant gorilla and he is subdued.

The beginning of Act 3 has the hardest cut between settings of any movie I have ever seen, yet it makes sense in the movie. Kong is somehow transferred to New York from Skull Island where the beast is chained up. Time has passed (I am not sure how much) but the giant ape will be revealed to the public at Radio City Music Hall. Denham has made $10,000 in one night in ticket sales to see the beast and gotten ahold of the press to document the occasion. It turns out that Driscoll and Ann are about to be married as well. All of this is neither shown nor explained outside of about 1 minute of dialogue. Anyway, back to the film...

Kong is being displayed for the public and Driscoll and Ann are dressed in their best that Denham has bought for them. The couple are introduced on stage and then the press is brought in to take pictures of the beast. Kong becomes so enraged by all of the flashing that he breaks his bonds and escapes. He is somehow able to get out into the streets where he stomps on people and destroys an elevated train. Ann and Driscoll escape and hide in a hotel which Kong is able to find. He does pick a lady out of the wrong room initially and he just drops her to her death. Second attempt gets a jackpot and Driscoll basically faints while a giant hand steals Ann. 

After some more destruction, Kong takes Ann and climbs the Empire State Building. They get to the top and planes are sent in to shoot Kong off the building. Eventually he falls and dies on impact. Ann and Driscoll are OK and Denham walks out of the crowd to see the body of Kong at the base of the giant building. The movie ends with Denham saying the famous line. “Twas beauty that killed the beast.”

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First, let me say what an absolute treat it was to watch this film with the commentary from the great Ray Harryhausen. That man is a class act with so much great insight into film making during the Golden Age of Hollywood. He was apparently 13 when the movie was released and he saw it in theaters on many occasions. The work of special effects director Willis O’Brien and producer Merian Cooper in King Kong influenced Harryhausen when he made The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, Jason and the Argonauts, and Clash of the Titans. The special effects in these films then influenced a huge list of great directors like James Cameron, Guillermo Del Toro, Tim Burton, Peter Jackson, J.J. Abrams, Wes Anderson, and George Lucas. I learned so much about the connection between King Kong and my favorite movies, it was just a great watch.

King Kong was actually made in three different sizes and there were multiple models of each. One giant gorilla head, which was manned by three men, with a single giant foot and a single arm with a hand, were made for the close up interaction shots with the actors. The fingers and toes on the full sized limbs had to be moved by hand (many very strong hands presumably) so there is no movement from the digits in these shots. A bunch of 2 foot wire framed puppets of Kong were made that could interact with the dinosaurs and the buildings around New York. Finally, a couple of six inch puppets were made to superimpose onto stock shots of the Empire State Building for the famous ending shots of Kong climbing the giant building.. 

Almost every shot in the film that didn’t involve a simple human interaction was created through layered shots. All the shots of the island, any shots of King Kong or any monsters, many shots of the jungle, and many shots of King Kong interacting in New York. The use of matte paintings in the far background with paintings on glass in front of those made all the shots seem deep and lush. In front of these were layered the stop motion puppets of Kong and the monsters and at the very front were humans and directly interactive props (cars, plants, huts, etc.). I never realized how much work went into every single shot of this film and I can see why it is so famous.

Another note is the direct influence on some of the most famous films of all time. The approach of King Kong started with sounds, went on to the effect of the great apes weight hitting the ground, and ended with the giant figure coming out from the trees. This method of introducing a monster has been highly copied, most notably the T-Rex in Jurassic Park. 

The film was somewhat risque at the time and some of the film was cut on first release. Kong biting people and squashing natives was not originally included. There was a scene in which Fay Wray fell into water in her ripped white dress and that was not included. Also, Kong picks up a lady from the hotel that Ann is in and promptly drops her (she wasn’t blond so she has to go), which was harsh enough to be cut from the original release. None of this seems that bad today, but there were no restrictions on film in 1933 and studios didn’t know what would upset audiences. 

One thing that struck me as funny while watching (and the commentators noted this as well) was how every character immediately loved and was willing to die for this blond white lady. Denham just found her on the street and the entire crew didn’t think she should be on board for about 3 minutes, then suddenly Driscoll loved her and the entire crew was willing to die horribly to save her. The natives took one look at her and thought she would make a better sacrifice then the young girl they had. Kong was willing to fight off all forms of monster to protect her. I thought he might have simply wanted a companion, but he tossed that other poor woman from the New York hotel down off a building. At the end, men shot the ape off the Empire State Building sending bullet spray everywhere in an effort to save the girl. I honestly don’t think she was worth it, but that is just one man’s opinion. 

So is this film worthy of being on the AFI List? Absolutely yes. It does not have great acting, but the contribution to American cinema through the effects, the story, and the pure ambition is well worth a spot on the list. Would I recommend it? Across the board yes with no hesitation. I especially recommend watching with the commentary, if that is your thing, because watching this film and listening to Ray Harryhausen tell stories is an absolute treat. Definitely one of the best film watching experiences I have ever had. 

[freevoidman]

Okay I’m reading through Porg’s update so some of y’all can save your braincells and here are some great highlights (under a readmore bc i couldn’t help but tear into a few things she suggested):

Flat out ignoring that Vergil had changed by the end of the game as a result of V and Urizen’s separate experiences.

In trying to make V and Urizen their own character, she throws out the idea of Vergil being manipulated by the Qliphoth/Urizen (??? somehow??? even though the tree is implied to be non-sentient i believe???), with V being a Devil hunter looking through the remains of Mallet Island (which was completely blown up, turned to rubble, and then swallowed by the sea, so... that can’t happen), finding the cane which makes him youthful and not sick but... having the cane makes it so he can only kill demons through the cane??? for some reason??? And he needs the Qliphoth fruit to heal himself and free him from the curse???

How did she make V’s backstory even more confusing and complicated how the fuck did she do that

Almost immediately after bringing up the cane, she instead changes it to be one of the rings he’s wearing because she wants her “precious V” to use weapons other than the cane, which makes all the prior paragraphs about the cane’s curse and only using it pointless. She’s the one writing this fic, why can’t she edit her own work so it’s more cohesive?

Despite saying that V should be a Devil Hunter, she doesn’t explain why someone who is supposed to be killing demons would form a pact with at least three to fight demons. Her rewrite dismisses Visions of V, and she even states later that the manga is a waste of time as it won’t ever be translated into English (which 1) is not a limiting factor to reading it as many people have translated it already and 2) doesn’t dismiss it’s value at building up V’s character, who she supposedly likes the best).

Also, for someone who complains about DMC5 being a rehash of DMC3, she’s sure doing her best to change it to a rehash of DMC1 (Vergil being controlled by an outside force, bringing back Mallet Island, bringing back Mundus [the cane is supposed to be tied to Mundus]).

V apparently can’t be human because she wants to give him a devil trigger, despite having 3 familiars and his own strength. Okay I guess?

Also it’s really fucking sick how she describes V changing, because it’s apparently V fusing with Nightmare? Devil May Cry has never been one for body horror but she straight up says she was inspired by “The Thing (1982), The Fly (1986), Bloodborne, and Resident Evil 7″ for the transformation imagery and I wanted to nope the fuck out of there real quick.

Her segments of actual fiction writing and dialogue are really bad it’s almost like a parody Youtube skit.

She switches between prose and script writing randomly, it’s really odd. She does it primarily with Dante i’ve noticed? Here’s an example I wrote of what she does:

“Hey, don’t stress out about it will you?” Says John following a few steps behind VINCENT: Don’t get your panties in a twist

And that just happens... randomly? Like, there’s no indication why she’s doing that it just happens.

She straight up writes notes in her fic about the controls for character actions in-game what the hell--

She also shamelessly puts in a link to artwork that clearly isn’t her’s (and I highly doubt she got permission to post about) to try and show what V’s Devil Trigger would look like. I couldn’t find it because I don’t know how pixiv works, but that’s just a shitty move, especially with how she treats artists on tumblr when they draw art of Vergil.

EDIT: Porg has now straight up copy-pasted the art into her fic without the artist’s permission which is, we all know, fucking theft. While it is good artistry, is just a weird mashup of Vergil’s and Dante’s. It’s not all that unique and I don’t understand why she had to reference a bunch of body horror shit when all the Devil Triggers in game are essentially just a large flash of light and a seamless transition between forms??? It’s good art, I’m not trying to bash the artist, but... Porg, you could’ve been a little more original here rather than just ripping off another artist’s designs...

Everyone in her fic acts super casually to seeing Vergil alive in the Qliphoth and it’s like... honey, no.

Vergil acts WILDLY out of character holy fuck. Like, I know I should have expected that but this is NOT how Vergil would act in the slightest. She’s pretty much writing an OC.

Building off of this: EVERYONE acts OOC and... it’s not exactly cringey, but it is perfect proof that Porg doesn’t know what she’s doing and hasn’t properly analyzed the characters.

Dante acts weirdly... detached? There’s no sign of him acting like his normal goofball-y self, and he’s much more serious than normal. He actually acts more like cannon Vergil than himself, actually. (He also knows CPR apparently? Which... is a skill he would really never bother learning, so...)

Nero doesn’t act nearly as emotional, and acts calmly for some reason. You can’t feel any of his emotions behind his dialogue, only through the adverbs added to the tags)

V is too informative. He knows way too much about random shit that... no one should rightfully know. I’ll mention it more later, but... V doesn’t act like himself and I don’t really know how to explain it.

Vergil is essentially her OC. Seriously--he’s not as brooding or snarky, he’s far too open and apologetic, there’s practically no sense of rivalry between him and Dante. Weirdly, he acts more like canon V than fic!V does, despite the fact that Porg wants to establish V and Vergil and separate characters. His actions also make no sense when put alongside his canon personality. We aren’t reading anything about Vergil, we’re reading about Porg’s weirdly idealized version of him.

I’m going to make a break in the post here because I feel like this is the part that needs the most attention:

Porg goes OUT OF HER WAY to dedicate a GIANT portion of this chapter to her own OC: Nero’s mom. There are several long paragraphs of establishing the relationship between her OC and Vergil, talking about leaving Fortuna, how they were ‘happy’ and then saying that after a hurricane (inspired by hurricane hugo, you’ll see later) she got separated from Vergil, never reconnected with him, GAVE BIRTH, died from a demon attack with Nero staying near her corpse, and then Nero was found by humans and taken off the mainland to be taken to an orphanage on Fortuna. She wanted a massive amount of time to be taken out of the fun parts of playing Devil May Cry to establish a relationship that would never come back and essentially turn into a 15 minute soap opera inserted into a game about having fun killing demons.

Alright back to the noted highlights.

Porg confirms in her fic that the universe of Devil May Cry happens in the US, and that Fortuna is an island along the southeast coast and I want to fucking rip my eyeballs out at this point.

The ONLY REASON why she is doing this is because she lives in Florida. I know she does, and she just wants to imply that this is all happening near her home turf. How anyone who lives in Florida thinks an island like Fortuna can exist is beyond me though, because playing through 4, most of the buildings are inspired by Italian designs, and no one in the states would build an entire island with italian designs. I’ve been to Florida multiple times--there’s no buildings there even REMOTELY designed to match Fortuna.

EDIT: I have been informed that Porg actually lives in Pennsylvania, not Florida, which makes both more and less sense. Why Florida? Why not a hidden island up on the east coast? Why does this have to be taking place in the states at all Porg???

Yeah, let’s take Nero off the MAINLAND OF FLORIDA after a DEVASTATING HURRICANE and send him to an orphanage on an ISLAND which would’ve been hit the hardest by ANY hurricane. TOTAL SENSE. 

She tries to make her own timeline for the series using actual real world dates and events and it’s terrible (she references Hurricane Hugo in 1989, and confidently states that 3 took place in 1990, despite all evidence for the actual dates of events being fan theory established through circumstantial evidence).

There’s so much horror movie inspiration here--not cheap horror, but really twisted shit that... doesn’t fit with Devil May Cry’s tone at all? In the slightest? She references Jacob’s Ladder, plus all the other body horror media I wrote above.

Straight up just tears Vergil’s arm off which sure, I guess we gotta make THAT a parallel between Nero and Vergil. They can have a father son moment over being physically maimed.

In the scene immediately before this, Urizen picks up Vergil by the head and roots around Vergil’s memories (somehow???) to show him all the ‘bad moments’ in his life to traumatize him. She describes it as the audience getting flashes of him falling to hell, charging Mundus, being Nelo Angelo, etc. 

This causes Vergil to cry and beg for Urizen to stop. Then Urizen rips off his arm. So. Yeah. Another point for the OOC!Vergil/OC-taking-Vergil’s-place board.

Also this point ALONE made me realize that Porg does not know how much time, effort, and money needs to be put into making assets. Like, the entire fic she was stressing that everything be done in 5′s HD Graphics--including the ruins of Mallet Island, so I have to assume she’d want these little snippets in HD too, which would be a massive money hole creating these assets for one scene that lasts maybe ten seconds total.

I know I stated it in one of my earlier posts, but most of what she’s writing would fit better with a sequel for the reboot series, not DMC5. It would make her OOC writing of Vergil make sense, all the horror movie inspiration and body horror shit would fit better there, especially all the crappy dialogue too.

She somehow made Griffon even MORE annoying than in cannon.

BTW if I had to listen to poetry while fighting the final boss of a video game, I’d sooner turn my PS4 off. Not that poetry isn’t cool and all, but it cheapens the final fight and distracts you. It wouldn’t work.

EDIT: I realized this point made no sense without context, sorry. Porg made the Book of Urizen (the poetry book by William Blake referenced multiple times by V) either weirdly prophetic or made it out like Blake had inner knowledge of demon powers or... something along those lines, and V magically has the knowledge that reciting poetry from the book about Urizen will... harm him? Weaken him? Open a gate to hell (she mentions a portal appearing near him)? It’s very unclear, but she essentially rewrites Urizen as the final boss, and makes it three stages (V [Griffon recites some verses, which is what the first point was about], Vergil and Dante [this is where Vergil gets his arm ripped off btw], and then Nero) with all three of them reading poetry from the book to deal the “final blow” to Urizen. I’d much rather have Vergil be the final boss than have to go through a three-stage boss fight while every character I play as recites poetry to kill the boss.

She mentions Dante using Sin DT against Urizen but I’m pretty sure with her fuckery of the game’s events Dante can’t GET Sin DT? Because there’s no fight between Nero and Urizen where he’d intervene?

COMPLETELY IGNORES VERGIL’S DEVELOPMENT OF WANTING TO TRAVEL WITH HIS BROTHER THROUGH HELL TO ELIMINATE THE QLIPHOTH FUCK OFF.

Also she changed the lore of the Qliphoth so that it sprouts semi-naturally around every 500 or so years? So... shouldn’t leaving the Qliphoth roots be fine now? Since it’s natural?

Nico acts like growing back arms is totally normal

Wrote an INCREDIBLY shoe-horned in moment in the van with Dante filling Trish and Lady in about finding Vergil and everything that happened where, once again, Trish and Lady act almost completely nonplussed that Vergil is alive after 20+ years in hell, with about 9 of those ten years being trapped under Mundus’ control and corrupted by the Demon King

Seriously why is no one surprised in this fic that Vergil survived? Dante has a brief moment before finding him, but everyone finds out and accepts it like flipping a switch (once again--ESPECIALLY DANTE, which is NOT how the grieving process works)

Porg states that the ending is trash because the twins are fighting in hell, but completely ignores that most of Dante and Vergil’s lives have been built on conflict and they like fighting demons, especially Dante. Both of them were happy and doing what they love.

She also completely ignores through this entire thing that Dante was really fucking depressed in the novels leading up to 5 but hey I don’t even know if she can read.

I can vaguely agree that Trish and Lady were sidelined and they should’ve had a bigger role. However, I can’t fault the directors for not doing this, because they were already developing three playable characters with their own unique fighting styles. She writes all this shit about the story, writes notes about controls and mission layouts, but forgets that it takes a lot more than pressing a single button to code a game.

She just doesn’t know what she’s talking about. Seriously, none of these things are cohesive or edited properly, and despite her saying she wanted better for Vergil, or Nero, or Dante, or V, she writes all of them incredibly out of character and doing illogical actions. I just... I don’t get it.

The best part is--I can’t even tell her about these things, or give constructive criticism. She moderates the comments on her fic and isn’t afraid to delete anything she doesn’t agree with or can’t make a ‘passionate rant’ about.

[littlemisssquiggles]

RWBY Musings #81: The Queen of Thieves. What if…Weiss Schnee will have to defend her family against Robyn Hill in the next episode?

Anon-ninja asked “Do you think Oscar might train with ironwood in the next episode? Maybe ironwood will eventually question him in private? That could be used ass a way to get this boy back into the story”

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Squiggles Answers:

No; not this family, sadly to say…

I mean the other one we don’t like to talk about.

This was originally just going to be just an answer post regarding my favourite best boy: Oscar Pine, however along the way it turned into a short musing post sharing this squiggle meister’s thoughts and theories for next episode, especially where Weiss is concerned. I don’t usually muse about the Weiss-cream but it’s actually an interesting small headcanon. 

Missing Little Prince

But before I get to talking about Weiss. Let’s talk about my boy again, just to answer the anon-ninja who asked me this question. If I can be honest with you anon-chan, I actually hope that's not the case. 

While I'm eager for Oscar to at least appear once next episode (like possibly in another memory flashback courtesy of Ruby to highlight the conclusion to her brief talk with Oscar from V7CH3), I honestly would better prefer for Oscar's training with Ironwood to be its own episode since Oscar could honestly use his own focus episode at this point.  Following his treatment during V6 and his treatment in the recent episode of V7, I am seriously very tired of the Writers overlooking him. Not saying that to sound disrespectful in any kind of way or to rag on the Writers but… I really need to ask---is Oscar a character or not? More than that; is he REALLY a part of the main cast and hero team or not? 

I’d like to think of Oscar as being in the same class as JNR. He’s part of the deuteroganist group whose story and development is just as important as our protagonist team. Or at least, it’s supposed to be?

 But I’m not sure anymore. I understand that good, exciting things were promised for the precious freckled farm boy turned little prince for this volume and while I’m trying my goshdarndiggity hardest to be as patient as I can be in anticipating that, apologies but my patience was surely tested last episode and it made me think back to V6 where I had a similar experience with Oscar’s story---anticipating him having a great season only for it to fall flat in the end with his overall treatment somehow being worse than V5. At least that’s how it was for me. Not speaking for all Pineheads here. This is only my opinion.

That being said, giving how the story went down last episode and given that CH5 was written by the same CRWBY Writer---Eddy Rivas---who mentioned that CH4 was his ‘baby’ chapter too, I have a feeling that we’re more likely to have a direct continuation to plot points established in that episode.

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Men On Mission

Now that our heroes have been rewarded their huntsmen licenses and were shown viewing the mission board at the end of the last episode, I feel like the next few episodes---CH5 to CH7 or just CH5 and 6---will be its own little mini-arc; just like how Brunswick Farms was its own little mini-arc back in V6.

I’m curious if the next few episodes might showcase our heroes going on missions around Solitas according to the mission board highlighted in CH4. I want to pay especial attention to the Solitas Mission board since it might provide a clue as to where JNR_RWBY might be next episode. 

Okay, so according to the Mission board: there are two escort missions and two perimeter defence missions that are open. The remaining two missions: Search and Rescue and Bounty are stated as “In Progress” so I’m assuming that those two missions already have huntsmen assigned to them.

I’m curious to know if that’s the mission that General Ironwood discussed with Clover beforehand.

Before Ironwood met with JNR_RWBY, he was last seen discussing something with Clover where he mentioned that he needed him on the ground while warning him to be subtle since if the people saw too many huntsmen around, it might attract trouble with the Grimm.

Speaking of, can I just take this moment to address how much Ironwood has grown here? I found it really ironic hearing Ironwood discussing subtly and the attraction of the Grimm with Clover since I still remember that this was the same man who wanted to bring the full force of the Atlesian Army to Vale and went behind his own colleague and fellow headmaster of many years to do so. You know what that’s called? Growth. It’s just a nice little parallel and call back to V2 that I appreciate.

So yeah, I’m assuming that Ironwood must’ve deployed Clover down in Mantle specifically to investigate what happened to Forest. 

Ironwood told Clover not to take Marrow since he’s probably not the most subtle or discreet of the team. Poor good boy. So I’m guessing that Clover must’ve taken Harriet instead since she was absent along with him in the end. 

Pfft…I almost want to make a wise crack about Clover taking Harriet as his mission partner for good luck since…y’know…she’s based off the Hare from the Tortoise and the Hare fable and y’know…rabbits represent good luck and all that jazz.

Anyways I’m going to assume that Clover and Harriet were deployed to one of the missions on the Board. Probably the Search and Rescue one since it’s slated as in progress. Since Tyrian has been confirmed to be targeting public leaders who speak out against Atlas, I’m curious if another public leader was reported missing in Mantle and Clover and Harriet were tasked in finding them and rescuing them if necessary. That’s pretty my hunch in regards to that.

Resuming talk about CH5, since the thumbnail for CH5 highlighted Robyn Hill making her debut next episode, I'm assuming that it'll continue from where CH4 left off. As I said, CH4 ended with the heroes taking up missions in Solitas.

We know that Jaune already accepted one of the Escort Mission with the pre-schoolers. That leaves the remaining three open missions on the board to be divided between Ren, Nora, Blake, Yang, Weiss and Ruby. 

Elm also hinted that one of the Perimeter Defence missions involving a lose Sayber needing two huntsmen for the job. 

So that leaves me to believe that the second Escort and the second Perimeter Defence mission on the board will probably require 2 huntsmen each depending on their difficulty level. 

That being said, here’s my squiggly theory for the next two episode mini-arc:

CH5 will be another mission-focused episode with JNR_RWBY each deployed on separate missions across Solitas. Since Jaune will be down in Mantle with his respective escort mission, my hunch is that Ren and Nora (Flower Power) will be joining him down in Mantle since they are the two who will be designated to tackle the Perimeter Defence Mission involving the lose Sayber down in the sewers.

This leaves Team RWBY. Since the season has been going really hard with them since episode 1, I’m going to take a wild guess and say that Yang and Blake (Bumblebee) are going to tag team for the second Perimeter Defence mission. This leaves Ruby and Weiss (Ice flower) with the second Escort mission which I’m going to assume is up in Atlas.

That’s my best guess.

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Queen Protects King?

Okay, now this is where things are really going to get headcanon-y. It’s also the part involving Weiss.

What if …for V7CH5, Ruby and Weiss take the Escort Mission and the person who they find out they’ll have to begrudgingly escort to wherever in Solitas is none other than Jacques Schnee and possibly Whitley too

Imagine…the look on Weiss’ face if she were to discover that her very first official mission after becoming an officially licensed huntress basically involves her working for her father and little brother---to be at their beck and call as she and Ruby play huntsmen body guards to protect them and escort them wherever in Solitas?

I think an episode like this would actually be pretty damn fascinating to watch play out, don’t you think? I think it would be great to see how Weiss would react to doing something like this especially after the awesometacular way she told off Jacques last episode. Not to mention that this could potentially be Weiss’ first time seeing Whitley again…now as an official huntress ESPECIALLY since the last time the two spoke, he basically told her that her becoming a huntress was a useless career path.

How did the young Schnee boy describe it? Barbaric? Beneath people like him and his father. I wonder just how barbaric and beneath Whitley it will be as he watches his sister use her abilities to protect his life before his very eyes? He might learn a thing or two.  

Besides I’m also curious to see how Whitley would react to seeing Weiss in action as a trained huntress; honed in her skills especially when she summons her knight. I wonder how Weiss would react having to protect her father and brother as part of her job. Seriously, I really would love for an episode like this.

And y’know what? I think it could potentially even be in the cards. My rationale for thinking an episode like this could potentially be canon is because, CH5 showed Robyn Hill in the thumbnail.

Robyn Hill is supposedly RWBY’s version of Robin Hood, right? Her and her Happy Huntresses are the RWBY-verse’s rendition of Robin Hood and his Merry Men, right?

That being said; wasn’t Robin Hood’s theme that he stole from the rich to give to the poor? Wasn’t there not a scene in the Robin Hood animated film by Disney where Robin and his Merry Men worked together to rob the greedy Prince John of his richies while he was on an excursion out of his kingdom carrying a chest of gold?

Robyn Hill will appear next episode. One of the missions in Solitas is an escort mission. 

What if…and this is a big if…CH5 will involve Ruby and Weiss tag-teaming for a mission to escort Jacques (and maybe Whitley) on some kind of business mission where they’re supposed to make a deal and collect money or something and during the mission, the group are not only ambushed by the Grimm but also Robyn Hill and her Happy Huntresses who arrived to pilfer from Jacques and take back what he’s exploited from the people of Mantle?

I know this sounds like farfetched idea but maybe I could be onto something. I’d like to think of Jacques as RWBY’s version of the Prince John apart from his double role as the Wicked Queen in Weiss’ Snow White story.

 I also think it could be pretty cool. 

Watching Weiss be a huntress and protect her family.  I know Weiss doesn’t necessarily need to prove anything to Jacques or even Whitley. However, I still think it’d be pretty awesome to see her in action and have Jacques be there to watch his cage bird soar high and kick ass to protect his sorry ass. 

I more like this idea as being a nice little segway into developing Weiss’ side of things. I’d especially love an episode like this so that we can have like a follow-up on what Jacques told Weiss about her dear mother. 

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Weeping Willow

First of all, I know Jacques has already been depicted as the scum of the Earth but how much lower can this man sink if he resorts to using his own ‘wife’s’ disease (I’ll come back to that in a minute) as a means of guilt-tripping Weiss into coming home or worse, make her feel bad for rightfully leaving home after how he treated her last time.

What’s noteworthy about that was Weiss’ reaction to learning about how her mother might have felt upon her departure.

This is intriguing to me since…not to make it sound bad in any kind of way but, it gave the impression that Weiss actually cares for her mother’s well-being which is…kind of new to me since the last time we saw Weiss in V4, she acted rather indifferent to her mother’s existence.

We never even saw them interact. I know she talked about her in V5, giving some more perspective on how things really were in Schnee Manor. But this is the first time I’ve seen Weiss show genuine concern for her mother and I feel like if she were to see Whitley again, she might be tempted to probe him with questions about the state of their mother.

“Y’know…your mother was devastated. Didn’t leave her room for days. Y’know how she gets when she’s upset?”

Y’know how she gets when she’s upset?

Huh. That’s an interesting thing for Jacques to imply here. I know he probably mentioned that to sort of hint at the common FNDM theory that Ms Schnee is an alcoholic, like Qrow used to be. However, I feel like there is more to it than that.

The first time we heard of Mama Schnee, the impression given was that she was an alcoholic who mostly spent her days drinking her sorrows away than raising her own children. Now, according to Jacques, she sounds more like an ailing mother and that there might be more to her circumstance than I initially pegged.

Due to this, I’m now inclined to ask the question or rather, make the theory:

What if… Mama Schnee suffers with chronic depression and alcohol is basically her coping mechanism to dealing with her condition as an alternative to seeking the right medical attention and help that she needs. 

Perhaps this could potentially tie in further to Jacques’ abuse of his own wife. Like imagine if...Jacques knew of his wife’s condition and used it as a means of manipulating her further?

Like in the beginning when he was being all nice just to get her to marry him and do what he wants, he used to make his wife feel like she didn’t need help at all because to him she was perfect in his eyes. Until the bomb finally went off and now, Jacques uses his wife’s condition as ammo to guilt his children, among other things?

It’s only a small theory. Like I said, I don’t usually muse about Weiss. But since we will be exploring more of her character and backstory this season, it’d be interesting to what’s in store for us with her and her family when we get into their family affairs. 

For now, I’ll just hoping that I’m correct about her and Ruby encountering Robyn Hill and the Happy Huntresses for the first time while defending Jacques of all people. I think that could be really cool to see. But as always, for now, it’s only a theory.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 So to conclude...

Now that I’ve mused mostly over Weiss’ side of things for CH5, as for Ruby:

...Well technically Ruby has currently become the main driver for anything to do with Oscar since the subplot involving her deceit if Ironwood is shared with Oscar. 

The most I’m hoping for with CH5 as far as Oscar is concerned is that it’ll show the conclusion to his talk with Ruby from since CH3.

That’s mostly what I’m hoping for since...honestly I 'm starting to think that Oscar might be absent from the next episode again. At least, I don’t think the plot will focus on him as much as JNR_RWBY unless it’s in flashback mode. 

Similar to Brunswick Farm in RWBY V6, I feel like CH5 and CH6 are probably going to be a mini arc involving our heroes being huntsmen in the field which will lead into them encountering and possibly clashing with the likes of Robyn Hill and her Happy Huntresses.

I genuinely feel like we might not see Oscar training with Ironwood til CH7---the midseason episode. Heck I feel like we might not even see Oscar again at all in the plot until CH7. 

Then again, as I said, this is only my best assumption here and who’s to say I’ll be correct?  I’m just a humble squiggle meister sharing her thoughts and theories as per usual. Take it as you will, fam.  

More Squiggles’ RWBY Content

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~LittleMissSquiggles (2019)

[sol1056]

let’s just leave this here

so let’s see how quickly I can get through a bunch of these, just so they don’t languish for the next month... here we go. behind the cut:  why the opening never changed, why DW is deploying Josh again, a few about Iverson & Hedrick, is a reboot possible, staying in fandom vs leaving... and some others in the same vein. 

why did they keep the same opening for all of vld seasons, considering the line-up was never supposed to come back to the original from s3?

Every indication is that originally, the team would return to the original lineup. Keeping the opening was probably meant to remind audiences of that inevitability. Or you could believe LM, who said the opening cost 20K to make, and thus was too expensive to do more than once. She’d rather spend that money on a vacation. 

So I've heard that Josh Keaton is doing damage control for S8. Do you think Dreamworks sent him in because they know that he's the one guy that no one can get mad at? After what some of the fans have done to him this past year [...] I’m amazed that he's willing to stick around and try to make his fans happy for as long as he can. I can see why people say "We don't deserve him."

Josh has somehow managed that sweet spot between charming the fandom and gaining its trust. Doesn’t hurt that he’s got the chops, voice-wise, to take written dross (no, really, some of those lines are horribly clunky) and spin it into gold. More than anything else, he comes across as genuine, and that adds a certain credibility to his words. 

But... Josh doesn’t really have a choice. Playing Shiro is what catapulted Josh upwards, and the last thing he can afford to do is piss off DW by refusing to play ball. He’d only be damaging himself (and his reputation among potential employers) if he didn’t snap to attention when called. Plus, I think he really does sincerely love the character, but it’s got to be a tough spot for him right now. 

When you get down to it, the only one on VLD’s (former) staff who seems to believe Shiro belongs in the story and should be respected as part of the story... is Josh. Who else can Shiro’s fans look to, if Josh stops speaking?

So, yeah, Josh is it. And I bet he knows that, and knows it’s just part of signing up for such a major role. This is part of his job. 

So I came across a pic of Mitch Iverson from SDCC 2018 where he and Tim Hedrick weren't in the panel ... and [Iverson] was wearing a SHIRO BLACK PALADIN top ... while the EPs & Hamilton were in the panel promoting S7, Iverson supported Hedrick & his story, and Shiro.

Hedrick was actively involved in every script as the story editor, and reportedly conceived of Shiro as an astronaut returning after his capture by aliens. Iverson got his start thanks to Hedrick, thus it makes sense that Iverson would be simpatico with Hedrick’s vision of the story. 

On top of that, by SDCC Iverson already had his next gig lined up. He continued to write for VLD, so he had to be subtle... but a t-shirt was a good way to make his sentiments clear. Can’t blame the guy, seeing he probably knew what was coming and chose a quiet protest of his own.

As an American, how would you take it if someone, that is, Iverson, called himself a redneck? From what I know thats derogatory term & for people not exactly inclusive & supportive of minorities. He also retweeted an art of Allura with a quote: ‘Laters’, which I found in really poor taste...

Redneck is another slur adopted by the in-group. My guess is that if you called Iverson a redneck to his face, he’d be offended. But if you introduced yourself as a redneck, and then called him one, it’d be different. And yes, as a term, redneck has a complex history, and it changes subtly in terms of how each generation defines/uses it. 

As for retweeting things in poor taste... eh, most people don’t have any training in social media. Jokes are the hardest; it’s so easy for them to go so wrong. Until VLD, I’d bet Iverson was lucky to have a few hundred followers. How many follow him now? It takes time to find your footing in striking the right balance of humor and dignity. 

Sometimes the best course is to ignore the stumble. They’ll either learn, or they won’t. Either way, it’s their problem, not ours. 

Will Tim Hedrick be allowed to continue the voltron universe the way he planned it?  

I doubt it. He’s got a new project. If you’re now an EP finally getting your name at the top, would you really want to go back and fix someone else’s story? Sometimes it’s just better to leave it behind, and make sure the next thing you do is something you can have pride in.

...why do you keep saying the last episode Tim Hedrick wrote was The Feud? A lot of people keep repeating it, like it was his last 'fuck you' to the showrunners. But official sources all say 'The Journey Within' was his last episode.

All we can say for certain was that tJW is the last Hedrick episode broadcast. That doesn’t mean it was the last one written. 

Here’s why a lot of us peg tF as Hedrick’s last written episode: the story editor credit. Hedrick's the sole story editor on all his other episodes; tF is the only one in which both Hedrick and Hamilton share credit. The simplest explanation is this episode was edited in that window during which Hedrick had one foot out the door, and Hamilton had one foot in. iow, Hedrick put it into the queue, edited half, and moved on. Ergo, last written.

I can’t believe how they just managed to anger literally everyone no matter your favorite character or ship.

I recall a quote from early on, where LM said they had a feeling they couldn’t please everyone. The problem (which I noted at the time, and has remained true) is that the answer isn’t to just piss off everyone. 

It’s to figure out who you want your audience to be, and to write the best damn story you can for that particular audience. If you end up with a story only old-timer DotU fans love, and kids are lukewarm about, fine. If the reverse is true, fine. You can’t please everyone, especially in a reboot/remake. So you pick your battles, and write your story accordingly. 

Looking around social media, most people I'm seeing are either rightfully upset, or they're hyperfocusing on the one single scene they liked because they just don't have the energy to deal with the show's bullshit right now. How can they fuck up the last season so badly that it seems like the general reaction is disappointment and denial?

I think there’s a common cause for the fandom reactions: exhaustion. 

In American broadcast television, a 26-episode season runs from September to May, then a summertime lull, during which people digest and discuss. Binge-watching is changing this, but it seems one thing hasn’t changed: no matter how fast we watch a show, we still require processing time. 

What did we get? A half-season, two months’ break, another half-season, two months’ break, a full season, three months’ break, and a final full season. If every season had provoked a spike equal to S1/S2, we might’ve been begging DW by June to just freaking chill. Fandom had barely begun to process one season and a new one was already landing on our heads. 

On top of that, S3-S6 weren’t exactly walks in the part, post-release. In terms of controversy, S7 dwarfed them all. That made an awful lot of people (across the entire spectrum, from almost every sub-group in the fandom) disengage. Those who remained dialed back on their expectations (”as long as X happens, that’s all that matters”), or they hung in there, insistent it would turn out alright. 

So either you’re exhausted from not being able to fully disengage with the final season still in the wings, you’re exhausted from convincing yourself this one specific thing would be enough, or you’re exhausted from defending what turned out to be indefensible. 

Frankly, disappointment and denial is a fairly soft landing, compared to what might’ve been. But any way you cut it, the fandom’s worn the hell out.   

Do you think LM and JDS are gonna address this or are they just going to ignore the complaints, wash their hands and move on?

They don’t need to do anything. They don’t work for DW anymore. If someone has to address the complaints, it’d be DW or DW’s chosen spokesperson. I guess you could call that washing their hands, but the simple fact is they’re not on the payroll. They’re not responsible for VLD anymore.

do you think it's possible for dreamworks to rewrite season 8? i've never heard of a show doing that before and i'm afraid that we'll be stuck with what we got, but damn, i really hope that we will get to see the characters get the endings they deserve, if nothing else.

I’m not sure why anyone would bother. S7 was rife with problems; S3-S6 meandered back and forth. If I were to do a soft in-series reboot, I’d go back to the end of S2. That’s the clearest break, story-wise. 

But if you’re going backwards 50+ episodes to the 26th, just keep going and start over. More to the point: not a lot of creators would sign on to inherit problems not of their own making. Same reason new directors on a property will want to rework the script in some way (if not start over from scratch). 

Do you think this is truly the end of Voltron: Legendary Defender? I know that a lot of the cast and crew wanted to continue on with a sequel, and there's so many possibilities and things they can do in that universe, not to mention that Voltron is (or rather, was) a money bank...

Your guess is as good as mine, really. Hopefully we’ll get at least hints when the SACanime panel rolls around in early January.

There's a change petition for the "original s8" to be released ... [people] believe that LM and JDS are NOT the ones who ruined the last two seasons and that it was "exec meddling." Like, no, sorry, exec meddling appears to be what made it good in the beginning.

If we consider Yoo an exec by virtue of being CEO of Studio Mir, then I kinda wish he’d meddled a bit more. 

...I'm wondering if the original version exists, completed. In one post, you said DW picked Tim over L/J so surely that got animated? What do you think? Be real. I don't want to get my hopes high thinking there's some buried treasure out there to find.

Ah, no, sorry, I wasn’t speaking in the sense of VLD but in the overall corporate sense. Here’s how the scenario often plays out: manager A and employee B do not get along. The longer they clash, the greater the chance A will find an excuse to fire B. The project is literally not big enough for the both of them. 

B could resign, quit, or do a preemptive strike: go over A’s head and ask for help. If B leaves the company shortly after, it means the higher-up said: “I’ve heard A’s side, and I think A is right.” The exec might offer a good reference, or blame it on a no-fault bad fit. Doesn’t matter; the exec’s chosen A’s side. 

Now, consider what actually happened: B gets transferred off the project, and gets a major promotion -- basically up to the same level as B’s former manager. Either B has some of the most amazing dirt ever, is phenomenally good at twisting reality to seem like the wronged party... or the higher-up reviewed the situation and decided that of the two, B was the one worth keeping. 

Having decided that, the exec made an offer B couldn’t refuse, which would be to run a show that’s practically tailor-made to fit B’s dream job. That’s what I meant by losing the battle (how VLD would go) and winning the war (being the party seen as in the right, by the execs). 

The only way for A to turn things around is to have a blisteringly successful final product. It could literally kill two careers with one stone: the (former) employee, B, who spun such a good story, and the exec(s) who believed B. 

Given the numbers I’m seeing for S8... that exec did choose wisely.  

ETA (sorry forgot this part): There might be pieces, but it really depends on what version control is in use (if any). For that matter, even if there were saved copies, who’s to say those didn’t get, whoops, deleted at some point? I’d put my bet on there being nothing, now, except what we got. Sorry. 

I could understand if you never want to have anything to do with this show ever again.

Oh, jeez, I was here before VLD and I’ll be here after. Once we all get over our mutual exhaustion (and the holidays, bloody great timing, there), it’ll be time to roll up our sleeves and get to work. Fandom’s got a lot to do, putting things back together in all the shapes that’ll make us happy. This is the best time to be in a fandom, if you ask me. Everything’s just getting started!

[krreader]

BTS reacting to you singing like a disney princess.

pairing: bts x reader fandom: bts warnings: / genre: fluff

a/n: asdfghjkl disney trash right here, so it was my pleasure to write this!!!

ask box | masterlist | fandoms | faq | multifandom reader blog

kim seokjin

Everything about you that day screamed Disney princess and you'd have to be a fool not to realize it. For Hoseok's birthday, they wanted to buy a cake like they usually would, but time was unfortunately not something they had, so you decided to simply bake one yourself.

So while Jin was still sleeping, you got up relatively early and started baking, humming to yourself at one point apparently, but you didn't even realize it.

And when he woke up, your singing was the first thing he heard and god, he had never been woken up by something as sweet as that. Not only sweet for his ears, but the scent that filled his nose was just as nice.

Pushing the blankets aside, he followed the smell and your voice and stood in the kitchen a moment later, watching you bake with a smile, before he said: “You never told me you were secretly a princess..”

“Huh?” you turned around with wide eyes, “What do you mean?”

“Let's just say..,” he walked over to you and leaned down to press a soft kiss against your lips, “If you start talking to birds, I'll start calling you Snow White.”

“Oh, stop it,” you giggled and cuddled into his chest, so that he wouldn't see the blush spreading on your cheeks.

min yoongi

He has sat through enough Disney nights with you to know, right from the first note, that you were singing Let it Go, but what Yoongi hadn't expected, was for it to sound so good.

And it wasn't just good, it sounded like straight out of the movie, like you had been one of the voice actresses and sang the song.

He couldn't help but record it with his phone, hoping that in one of his future songs, he could somehow incorporate your beautiful voice.

You found him standing in the hallway when you left his bedroom, smiling happily, “Oh! What are you doing here?”

“Nothing,” he shrugged, a small smirk playing on his lips, “Just enjoying your voice..”

“My..- Oh my god, did you hear that?!”

“Every single line, baby,” he laughed and pulled you towards him when you became shy.

jung hoseok

Hoseok didn't feel like this very often, but when he did, you always did your hardest to make him happy again.

And as your head was lying on his chest and you were gently brushing over it, you did the first thing that came to your mind. Something that always helped you when you were upset..

..you sang to him.

The first song that popped into your head had been Reflection from the Mulan movie and maybe that was quite fitting for his situation right now and all his insecurities.

Hobi just listened, closed his eyes eventually and let your beautiful voice lull him to sleep. Sleep, that he hadn't had for almost two days, just because he’s been thinking about so many things that were keeping him awake at all times.

There was one cure for his unhappiness.

And that was you and your beautiful princess voice.

kim namjoon

“Babe.. I'll clean tomorrow, I promise.”

“I feel like you need motivation.”

“I do,” he nodded, “But there is none right now, so I'll do it tomorrow.”

You stood in front of the bed, your hands on your waist and cocked your head to the side. Then an idea popped up in your hand and within a minute you grabbed a broom and brought it back to his room, beginning to search for the instrumental version of When Will My Life Begin from Tangled.

He watched you with raised eyebrows, dance around the room and sing to the movie.. surprisingly accurately too. Your voice suited the song and it really did sound like you were a Disney princess and within those three minutes and a lot of him laughing, he did end up cleaning with you.

But only because you promised to continue singing and dancing like that for the duration of you two cleaning.

park jimin

You watched him struggle with a dance move, the same one that he's been struggling with for over an hour now and you could tell that he was slowly losing his mind.

“Maybe you should take a break,” you got up from the ground.

“Jagi, I can't, I need to be..-”

But you didn't even let him finish the sentence when you grabbed his hands and turned you towards him, putting one hand on your waist and taking the other one in yours.

“Let me lead, okay?” but he wasn't even sure what you wanted to do.

Not until you suddenly started singing Once Upon A Dream and a second later you were slowly dancing through the dance practice room. This kind of dancing was so not what he was used to, especially not since he joined Bangtan. But letting you lead and sing.. it was like he was in one of those Disney movies himself. He was so mesmerized by your voice and eyes and before he knew it, he stopped moving and pulled you towards him, one arm now fully wrapped around your waist and holding your other hand in his, kissing you like his life depended on him.

Definitely Disney worthy that kiss.

kim taehyung

You and him were with his family for a couple of days and because the kids of his family (literally all of them) seemed to have fallen in love with you, you had agreed to take them all upstairs to tuck them in.

But when it took you longer than he would have expected, he decided to go up there and see what was taking you so long.

And he didn't even reach the door when he already heard it.

You were singing to them.

And you know, not the usual singing, but good singing. He knew you were good, but the fact that you sang Part of your World from the Little Mermaid, made him realize that you sounded just like a princess.

So he waited outside, leaning against the wall and listening to it with a smile, that only grew softer when you finally came out.

“What?” you giggled.

“Nothing,” he kissed your cheek, “Just realized that I can't wait for you to sing that to our own children.”

He really hadn't thought he could fall in love with you any more, but you proved him wrong every single day.

jeon jeongguk

“Come on, this is going to be fun!” he said.

But when has singing on the PlayStation with a professional singer ever been fun? You knew he'd outshine you in every aspect. Karaoke was nice and all that, but only if you both sucked. You knew that your boyfriend didn’t.

So even though you didn't like it, when your part of 'A whole new world' came on, you started singing, trying not to look at him, because you'd definitely get embarrassed.

You just sang the lyrics on the screen while the scene of Aladdin was playing in the background.

And when Jeongguk didn't sing his part, you turned your head to look at him, finding him staring at you with an open mouth.

“You never told me you could sing like a princess.”

“You're making fun of me..”

“NO! No I'm not, I'm serious! You sound.. beautiful. Honestly.”

And that meant a lot coming from him.

[pass-the-bechdel]

Marvel Cinematic Universe: Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)

Does it pass the Bechdel Test?

Yes, once.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Five (29.41% of cast).

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Twelve.

Positive Content Rating:

Three.

General Film Quality:

No matter how many times I watch this, I’m always surprised by how excellent it is. If any other future Marvel film wants to be ‘the best’, this is the movie it has to beat for the title. 

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) UNDER THE CUT:

Passing the Bechdel:

Natasha asks about the ballistics on the weapon used against Fury, and Maria responds. I’ve heard people argue that Natasha was not asking Maria specifically and therefore this does not count, but since Natasha clarifies a detail of Maria’s response (to which Maria responds again in order to confirm), I definitely think it qualifies. I have allowed a pass for far, far less in the past. 

Female characters:

Natasha Romanov.

Peggy Carter.

Maria Hill.

Sharon Carter.

Renata.

Male characters:

Steven Rogers.

Sam Wilson.

Brock Rumlow.

Georges Batroc.

Jerome.

Jasper Sitwell.

Nick Fury.

Alexander Pierce.

Aaron.

Arnim Zola.

Senator Stern.

Bucky Barnes.

OTHER NOTES:

They start this movie by having Steve go for a jog and make a new friend, with a conversation ensuing that is by touches casual, light, humorous, insightful, serious, and sobering. It’s a pretty weird way to launch a much-anticipated superhero comic-adaptation action movie sequel, to be honest, but it’s also rock-solid character establishment - for the never-before-seen Sam Wilson, and for Steve Rogers whose mental state and coping skills in the modern era are kinda an open question at this point - and by getting us on level with Steve’s day-to-day (rather than Captain America’s, which comes after) they’ve immediately prepped us for a story in which this character confronts and reassesses who he is and what he stands for at a core level, and not just in a symbolic/legacy kind of fashion (a la Tony Stark). It may say ‘Captain America’ on the tin, but this is Steven Rogers’ story. This is a fantastic and well-condensed first three minutes of this film, before they fly off to deliver the action sequence we may well have expected to have received up-front. 

Oh yeah, also this opening scene involves jogging around the Washington Monument, which is not a subtle detail, but I can dig it. If they’d had Steve draw attention to some Major American Landmark at some point in the movie and make a patriotic declaration of some kind, then I’d cry foul, but as-is the use of Washington DC as a setting is the hardest they bother to hammer the AMERICA button. The absence of self-fellating patriotism which I appreciated so much in the first film continues to be a virtue in this one. I do dig.

Remember how I really love it when people get hit and fly off the screen? Steve just kicked a dude off a boat and I made the dorkiest ‘hee hee!’ noise ever. Sure am glad the only reason anyone knows about that is that I just told y’all, and not because anyone actually heard me.

One day, we’ll stop getting these kinds of gratuitous butt shots of female characters in tight clothes. But it sure ain’t this day.

In a world of equal-opportunity sexualisation, this Cap-butt would be forgiveness enough for the aforementioned offense. But it still sure ain’t that day, friends.

Other reasons to love that opening scene: they low-balled Sam’s counseling skills to us by having him quickly identify the best way to speak to Steve and to engage with him (as Steve, again, not as Captain America; that’s the key), and that’s what allows Steve to bond with him enough that, put in a tight spot and not sure who to trust, he shows up on Sam’s doorstep later in the film. Really tight characterisation and dynamic-building.

ALSO, Steve’s adventure to the Captain America museum exhibit reminds us all of what he’s lost - specifically, Bucky Barnes - and contextualises his encounters with Sam Wilson within the emotional landscape of Steve’s desire for close male companionship, highlighting the need which compels the formation of that bond while also accentuating the sense of Steve’s present isolation and uncertainty, robbed of any understanding confidante (the bittersweet reality of having Peggy Carter still alive, but losing herself to Alzheimer's, really hits that one home). Again, Steve’s emotional landscape is actually a vital part of the story of the film on both character and plot levels, so there’s a LOT of great show-don’t-tell demonstration in the interconnections of all these scenes, PLUS they’re doing the good work for all the other characters involved AND reminding the audience of the score so that the film can continue to draw from the past as the movie continues, without losing any viewers for whom this might be the first foray into the Captain America story. This movie is just...really well put together, guys. It’s a little shocking, how good it is.

Winter Soldier intro is too cool. Not a pun.

Steve takes a chance and asks his neighbour out for coffee; she declines with a soft no; he accepts even-tempered and assures her he won’t trouble her any further, and she lets him know that he’s no trouble and there’s no hard feelings. It’s all a very painless and respectful navigation of boundaries, and taken on face value (ignoring the part where she turns out to be an undercover SHIELD agent, and everything which unfolds from there), it’s a welcome example of how easy it is to take rejection graciously. Guys, be the Steve Rogers that women want to see in the world.

I want a metal arm. I don’t want to not have my current arms, they’re fine, but in an abstract version of the world where you have things purely for cool points, I want a metal arm.

The fight choreography in this film is great. It’s good watchin’. 

Also the soundtrack is top-end. 

“...Specimen.”

The movie didn’t need a hetero kiss thrown in there, though. I sure wish there wasn’t a random kiss in there.

“The answer to your question is fascinating. Unfortunately, you shall be too dead to hear it.” 

Urgh, why Senator Stern gotta show up, be a pig about women, make his little Nazi declaration, and leave? The answer is, he really doesn’t gotta. You know what’s good shit? Not using misogyny and objectification of women to demonstrate that a bad guy is a bad guy, unless it’s actually a relevant part of the story. One day...

I can’t deal with how cool the Winter Soldier is. I’m almost embarrassed by how much the whole Silent Sauntering Assassin thing works for me.

Sam Wilson brings a tiny knife to a gunfight and still gets the upper hand because he’s perfect.

THE FIGHT CHOREOGRAPHYYYYY

The Winter Soldier is barely in the film in the first hour, and Bucky is referenced in the museum but not discussed by any of the characters, so there’s no lantern hanging on either the mystery of the Winter Soldier’s identity or the conspicuous reminder of a supposedly dead character (another reason why tying the memory of Bucky in so tightly with Steve’s present state of comfortless seclusion is important and clever). If you somehow managed not to be spoiled for it already, the Bucky reveal is a real kicker of a twist.

The degree to which I adore Sebastian Stan’s attention to detail in his performance has increased tenfold since The First Avenger. Dude has got nuances on his nuances.

The part of me that is emotionally susceptible to heroism is very moved by all the nameless SHIELD agents who stand up to HYDRA and die for it. 

I join the rest of the world in being really disappointed that what appeared to be Jenny Agutter’s councilwoman kicking Strike Team ass was actually just Black Widow. Sorry Natasha.

The Winter Soldier shows up and murderises a heap of pilots, and the part of me that is susceptible to heroism finds itself in conflict with the part that is susceptible to the Winter Soldier’s ineffable coolness (which is itself at odds with the part of me that wants Bucky Barnes to be safe and happy). This movie got me good.

Rumlow talkin’ some shit about pain and Sam’s just like “Man, shut the Hell up,” and it’s perfect. I love him.

I love this film. I mean I really, really love it. Like, I mean this is one of my favourite movies in the world. Like, if we were playing that ol’ game of ‘if you had to pick ten movies, and those were the only movies you were allowed to watch for the rest of your life’, this would be one of my ten movies. That’s how much I love this film. There’s so much to get into here, so much to enjoy: it’s light and easily-digestible enough for when you just want to be entertained by something that doesn’t demand too much from you, but it also has serious depths for when you’re in the mood to dig in. It has well-crafted action scenes, but also a strong plot with powerful emotional currents. It has wonderful, charismatic actors playing intriguing characters, and most of them are good eye candy, but none of them are just eye candy - there’s a lot of complexity to unravel in the motivations and personal narratives of the leads. It’s a superhero movie, sure, but it’s also a political spy thriller. And, to top it off, it’s not only an excellent stand-alone film, it’s also a fantastic example of how to do a sequel right.

Sequel-making can be a fraught business; you’ve got sequels that are basically just pointless retreads of the original, sequels that are so different they hardly count as sequels at all, sequels that are so busy trying to be ‘bigger and better’ than the original they become ridiculous, sequels so busy attempting to capitalise on the spectacle of the original that they forget to have any of the same heart that gave the original meaningful impact, sequels that ignore that the original had a plot and themes and that maybe that stuff was relevant to its success, etc, etc...there are lots of great sequels in the world, certainly, but as Iron Man 2 and Thor: The Dark World already attested for the MCU, it is very, very easy for sequels to go wrong. For this film, I think it goes without saying that I feel they passed all of the above sequel-killing quality tests with flying (low-key red-white-and-blue) colours, hence my adoration. But, just for kicks, lets talk about how they did it.

For starters, you can pretty much guarantee that this isn’t gonna be a pointless retread of Captain America: The First Avenger, since this movie takes place seventy years later and there are certain essential world elements that have fundamentally changed, such as technology, characters, and the fact that WWII ended a good while previous. But, that’s exactly how they make this story work as a sequel: they use the nature of change to give the film its shape, thematically, politically, emotionally, and in doing so they assure that everything which is different in the present builds directly from the past. Steve Rogers has not fundamentally changed, and that’s a critical anchor, considering he’s the titular character and all, but he is in a state of flux due to everything else that has changed, and his doubts inform the narrative landscape. This is not the world he remembers, and yet, as the plot unfolds and he digs into the conspiracy at his feet, there’s plenty there that is hauntingly familiar, because this is a story about how the past is still alive and kicking in the present, it has just updated to keep with the times.

It’s worth noting that despite Captain America making the jump from the forties to the modern age without any stop-offs in between, the film doesn’t linger on or wallow in the differences in his world in any strict sense - even Steve himself (in that EXTREMELY well-crafted opening scene with Sam) is somewhat dismissive of the specifics, because he’s not dwelling on the oh-woe-things-have-changed, he’s just trying to get his head around it, adapt, and move forward (and the practical realities are easy enough, but the emotional facets? Yeah). The thing is of course, no one else shares this problem with Steve; they’ve all been around, variously, for the parts in between, and the story is still concerned with the context of the world which made all of its characters what they are, and particularly with the war that came after WWII, the war within which HYDRA reseeded and began to grow anew: the Cold War. In particular, it’s the ‘70s/’80s era Cold War, built into the political-thriller superstructure of the film itself and driven home most overtly by the Winter Soldier, heavily Russian-coded and steeped in the potent psychological horror of brainwashing, but there are other signifiers littered across the story as well. There’s former-KGB agent Black Widow, and the reference she makes to WarGames, and there’s Arnim Zola frozen in time by the ancient computer system which now acts as his ‘brain’, and then there’s the stroke of subversive genius in the casting of Robert Redford - the positively Captain America-esque blue-eyed-blond hero of many a seventies Cold War political thriller - as our primary villain, working within the United States government for the benefit of his secret European-originating agenda in true foreign-infiltration style. Of course, we can adapt all of this to fit the radicalised terrorism and technological paranoia of modern times (and those elements are alive and well in the text with the surveillance-state fears represented by the helicarriers), but the historical timestamping is important to the trajectory of the film; times change and things grow increasingly subtle and complicated, but the core dilemmas that call people out to fight are instantly familiar. In that sense, Steve Rogers hasn’t missed much at all.

The war that calls Cap to arms this time around may be more subtle than the openly-fought battlefields of WWII, but it is no less global or insidious; the new ‘improved’ HYDRA may not be led by a literal Nazi who peels off his own face, but the cold political calculations of Alexander Pierce are much more frightening for their realism (an aspect of the film which has become increasingly prescient for the modern era since the movie was released), and the fascist supremacist dogma that compels these villains to attempt to reshape the world with the blood of millions is drawn from the same poisoned well; this is an escalation of the same enemy that Captain America faced before, only much closer to home. And while the passage of time has benefited the old evils in allowing them to entrench and fester and craft re-branded, more socially-accepted versions of themselves, it has not been so favourable to the positive familiar things from Steve’s past: it has claimed Peggy’s memory, and rotted SHIELD beyond recovery. And then, there’s what it’s done to Bucky Barnes.

Fake-out character deaths are a major staple of the superhero/comic genre, and not one I love, since it tends to take the power out of apparent-death scenes and leaves the drama feeling contrived, and while the Bucky reveal is not entirely free from that cynicism, it sells itself well on delivery. For starters, it packs a wallop in additional drama instead of just neatly undoing that which already existed (Nick Fury’s ‘death’ and reveal, on the other hand, is more in the classic line of cheap and inconsequential), and it ups the personal stakes for Steve in exactly the same way as Bucky’s ‘death’ did in The First Avenger. Crucially, the fact that Bucky is the Winter Soldier doesn’t alter the wider narrative in any convenient way, such as providing Captain America with the key to stopping him or resolving the other conflicts of the plot through his connection; the Bucky reveal reconnects the story to Steve’s emotional journey, which is exactly where it started before Shit Got Crazy - there’s a good reason they spent the first half hour of the movie on charting Steve’s mental state. There’s a sharp division between Bucky Barnes and the Winter Soldier, despite them both inhabiting the same form, and it’s a mirror of the division between Steve Rogers and Captain America: regardless of all assumptions to the contrary, the two are mutually exclusive entities. ‘Captain America’ is not a person, he’s a symbol, and he’s manipulable in that way, he can be propagandised, his image and actions are a tool turned to the purposes of others at the expense of the human underneath; Steve recognises this (and has since the first film), and he holds this secondary persona at a remove and does not define himself through it. This is what Sam’s keen social instincts pick up so quickly in the beginning: treating Steve as Captain America is the wrong approach, it fails to connect, because Steve is not the uniform, Steve has doubts, Steve could give up the shield; Steve is a person. Bucky doesn’t have the same luxuries, in opportunities, in company, or in the cognizant ability to define his own identity, but even without the personal attachment of their history, Steve is uniquely positioned to understand the difference between the Winter Soldier and the person buried beneath the title. If it was not Bucky, specifically, the visceral emotion of the mirrored experience wouldn’t land quite as strong, but either way the Winter Soldier is the realisation of Steve’s deep-seated fear of being made a puppet, an unthinking enforcer too heavily indoctrinated into patriotic subservience to recognise the despotism that has replaced his idealism. 

I said at the top that this is, ultimately, a Steven Rogers story to which ‘Captain America’ is an accessory, and not the other way around, and that’s a fact at the heart of what makes this film work - on its own, and as a sequel. The fore-fronting of Steve as a character in his own right and not just ‘Captain America’s real name’ was key to avoiding any cloying patriotism overriding the narrative of the first film, and it’s doubly important now as both Steve and the Captain America brand re-situate outside of their original context. It’s easy to strip back the specific trappings of Captain America and still have this movie function just right, because for all the action and intrigue, it is essentially a character piece about Steve Rogers figuring out his place in the world and reclaiming the moral compunctions which have been presumptuously attributed to the lofty symbol of his alter ego, and not the struggling reality of everyday life. Captain America is what he is and how he is not because it sounds good or because it makes for positive PR or because it’s nice to have legends from the good ol’ days; Captain America is the embodiment of scrappy little Steve Rogers’ grit and determination to live up to what he believes in, come Hell or high water or the gravest of consequences. Steve begins the film at odds with himself, unsure if there’s a place for his shameless idealism within the mess of modern life; he’s going through the motions of being Captain America, but he’s uncertain of what it means to him at this point, or where it’s headed. He finishes the film having gained something vital: a mission, but it’s not a professional job for Captain America, it’s a personal mission for Steve Rogers, and that’s much more important. Captain America is just an idea; Steve Rogers is the reason it matters, no matter what war, what time, what place, or what flag.

[lightsandlostbells]

Druck season 2, episode 5 reaction

Sorry this is late! You can blame it partly on the ~polar vortex~ and partly on fatigue. 

anyway, who’s ready to solve the great mystery of the ages, Whose Dick Is That

Episode 5

Clip 1 - Hotel Hardenberg

The doorbell is ringing. Mia wakes up in utter contentment, love that little shot of her foot stirring. The apartment seems to have been tidied up and Alexander’s bed on the floor put away.

Alexander has left her Post-Its as a parting gesture, there’s one on her phone with a heart. Charming move! He comments that she snores. Also charming from a certain perspective (that perspective is Mia is adorable). His other Post-Its in the apartment indicate that he’s made her rosehip tea and thank her for staying at Hotel Hardenberg, what a dork. 

Mia gets up to go but then strips the bed. A sign of her compulsive neatness and need for order, especially after that order has been broken by staying at Alexander’s? Or just her wanting to be a thoughtful house guest? Or her wanting to erase the evidence of her presence? All three?

On the way out the door, Mia runs into Björn, who describes himself as a friend of Alex. So, probably not his brother. He’d tell her if he were his brother, right? Saying “I’m Alex’s brother” seems more trustworthy for most people than “I’m Alex’s friend.” And he gave his real name, we know that Alex is referring to a Björn in his text messages with Sam, so Björn can’t have been worried about Alex telling Mia about him and Mia knowing who he is.

Björn says he’s here to get something. I sure bet Alex doesn’t know about that! Something shady is happening! He asks her name and Mia gives it to him. Ohhh, dear girl, you don’t know it but that was probably not a good move. (The biggest plot twist would be if Björn was some totally harmless guy that Alexander had wronged, so Björn was trying to avoid him at all costs and Alexander was trying to find him and apologize.) (I 100% do not believe that is the case but damn it would be a trip.)

The clip started with the doorbell ringing so that must have been Björn. Was he trying to see if Alex was home so he could sneak in while the place was empty? Because evidently Björn got into the building fine, and usually there’s better security in those places, and he’s the one who opens the apartment door, not Mia, so he must have had a key. My guess is that Björn is like the sister’s boyfriend/ex/friend who would have had access to the apartment before Alex moved in.

Alexander sent her a text that he’s in London, doing business/real estate stuff for a few days. #ishereallythatrich - Heh, but what are the odds he’s doing something else?

So I bet that’ll come back eventually, that Mia saw Björn entering the apartment, and she didn’t tell Alex right away. But damn, imagine if Mia hadn’t woken up with the doorbell and Björn walked in on her while she was sleeping. Or if she hadn’t left yet and caught him rummaging around through Alexander’s shit.

Clip 2 - Linn the apartment ghost

One week later due to the hiatus, Mia and Alex are texting. When he asks her how she’s doing, she starts to type out a friendly reply but then stops herself, but unfortunately Alex can see when she’s typing

He asks her to go out for a drink, she says she has to study. They have some “banter” and I know they are flirting but it just makes me tired that part of their dynamic is “I won’t go out with you” followed by “Are you sure?” It’s an issue that extends beyond Winterberg, Noorhelm, or any other version of this pairing - men are socialized not to take no for an answer from women, and it’s too prevalent in real life to really get over it in fiction. Like this texting could’ve been about anything else, more banter about them snoring (Mia says he also snores) or her playing the piano or his Post-Its or literally anything other that this no-yes-no dynamic. 

It’s exacerbated because it is a case of “Well, she doesn’t really mean no, she does actually like him.” Mia almost seems disappointed when Alex stops texting back. And again, one of my big problems with how Noorhelm and all its equivalents have been portrayed is that we don’t need more stories where a girl keeps saying no when it turns out she kind of means yes. You can’t separate this individual story from the larger cultural trend. 

LMAO, Linn announces her presence by loudly slurping on a drink behind Mia  She just wanted to see what’s up with Mia and has been standing there a while. This moment is played for laughs but I think it’s also meant to be a reminder that hey, Mia and Alex aren’t in their own little bubble, other people exist and are eventually going to find out that something’s happening with them. It’s almost like Mia has been caught. 

New shot during the end titles of Mia in a hoodie looking dramatic. So far we haven’t seen any of these little end scenes in action. Are these just for promo? I think it’s more likely that they’ll happen in a later episode, I just find it interesting that none of them have taken place yet.

Clip 3 - Dicks in the air

Photocopies of boobs and blurred out dick drift by like tumbleweeds with nipples as Mia heads into the school. A girl hands her a boob picture for some reason, as if Mia needed one for personal use.

When she steps into the school, there’s boobs and ass and dick and the middle finger everywhere. We can hear a literal buzz as people observe. Accompanied is graffiti that says Abi Chaker Clan 2019 - 12 Years Family! Lmao, is that a teacher frantically trying to gather up copies on the stairs? You try your hardest, sister.

Kiki steps up and observes, takes a picture of the display. Where have you been, Kiki? Last we saw you, you were breaking Carlos’ heart.

Kiki thinks she recognizes Alex’s penis in the pictures, and Mia is like “get that picture out of my face plz.” Kiki hands it to Mia as she walks away, and Mia can’t resist a glimpse of the dick, which is blurred out for us viewers, by the way. I’m just laughing at the thought of Kiki the dick detective solving this whodunnit. Remember on New Year’s where Mia was kinda “???” about Kiki’s future profession and ended up with influencer? I would say Kiki’s true calling is solving phallic-related crimes and picking dicks out of a lineup except, as we learn later in the episode, she ain’t that great at it after all.

Hanna shows up in an echo of Kiki’s entrance and is like, WTF, we’re in trouble. They see Alexander and Jonas hugging it out in the distance and are like, when did they become friends? So I’m guessing this graduation prank is taking the place of the Yakuza fight, and it’s Alex and Jonas who have the suspicious friendship rather than P-Chris and Isak. I APPROVE. The Yakuza thing has always been out of place IMO, tonally, and I didn’t like how the fight ended up leading to excuses against William smashing a bottle on a dude’s head. This prank is something that’s serious but not so serious that I’d consider it a red flag/dealbreaker against Alexander. It’s also a lot closer to Mia personally, and affects her and basically all the characters - the Yakuza thing felt weirdly disconnected from Noora and the girl squad, only something that involved them because they happened to witness that one fight and some of their friends/boyfriends were involved. 

It’s also a replacement for the Penetrators trashing the cabin, and I fully realize that this is hypocritical but I also prefer this somehow even though it’s functionally the same thing, destruction of property. Maybe because again, it’s more connected to the rest of the characters as a plot point.

There’s this rather extravagant shot of someone throwing a bunch of the copies over the banister and they float down around Mia, just a ton of boobs and butts and dick wafting like snowflakes, and it’s so ridiculous that I love it.

Clip 4 - Mia keeps some interesting things in her bag

Leonie’s leading a meeting, again. This time it looks like more of the graduating class, not just the committee. She explains that somebody, probably several people, broke into the school Saturday night and made copies of their …. She trails off and Carlos helpfully supplies the displayed body parts with anatomical precision.

Someone give Leonie’s actress an award for that brief look of disdain at Carlos after he says “You’re welcome” and before she turns away. 

Because someone sprayed the Abi Motto on the wall, the school thinks someone from our year did it. Carlos and Jonas call it bullshit, fake news. Just as an aside, I’ve seen the term “fake news” pop up as a joke in SO many films and TV shows recently, including that Kurt Russell sexy Santa movie, and like ... I certainly understand why and I’m not opposed to “ironic” usage, I’m also just aghast that we’re at a point where it’s mainstream, you know? 2019, man.

Anyway, one of the new and expensive copy machines broke from the prank and “copy orgy”. Sam whispers to Amira that they didn’t just make copies - so was there a literal orgy on the copy machine? Or just the weight of people’s asses broke the machine? 

Kiki says she thinks it was Alexander, and I thought it was extremely fishy for Kiki to be so quick to blame Alexander, and that maybe she was involved in the prank or even trying to frame him, but obviously that turned out to not be the case. So I think she just wanted him to be guilty so he could get in trouble. And she’s telling Mia, who she thinks will be an ally in blaming Alex.

So now they owe 4500 euros to the school. Either who did it owns up and settles it with their insurance, or the school takes it out of the Abi account. Leonie gives the culprits a chance to reveal themselves. Man, what if Leonie was involved? The perfect crime, the least likely suspect…

Alex smiles over at Mia but that expression fades, Sara waggles some xeroxed breasts at him and he smirks. So those are her boobs, right? She seems pretty proud.

No one confesses to the crime, so Leonie says they have to raise the money again, thanks for nothing. Lmao, Leonie is such a hall monitor type that she’s really growing on me.

There’s some tense music as Mia is exiting the room, and of course Alexander is waiting for her. She walks right by him, to the door. On second thought, she turns around, pretends to rummage in her bag (we see she still has the dick pic so I guess the possibility that it’s Alexander’s is enough for her to keep it around) and then pulls out what she was looking for - a middle finger. That’s so petty, I’m in love with her. She goes out the door and Alexander does not seem pleased.

I mean, to be fair to him, Mia did jump to conclusions right away. (Conclusions that happened to be right, although not about the dick pic.) And I think this was in a way about re-establishing the natural order of things, getting back to “Alexander’s a selfish asshole” territory rather than her liking him, in addition to the whole class being punished. To be fair to her, too ... it’s only recently that he’s shown some decency, and he has a history of doing crappy things. 

Alex was texting Mia on Saturday, though, right? About wanting to go out and get a drink with friends? So maybe that will be used to exonerate him, he was busy with other people. (EDIT from the future: Lol, nah, his “drink with friends” turned into the prank, I guess.)

Clip 5 - Team Michi

Mia has handed over the dick pic to Hans for his opinion, I guess? Hans seems to be a penis connoisseur so I understand the sentiment. And his opinion is that it was a “heavy petting orgy” at least. He asks Michi for his opinion. Good, Michi is there! I think it’s nice if Hans is getting a little romance of his own, although he better be treating Michi right and not taking him for granted.

Hans teases Mia about why she wants to know so badly about what happened at the school on Saturday night, and if she isn’t a bit jealous. She says curiosity isn’t the same as jealousy. Sure, but the two aren’t mutually exclusive.

Mia goes to ask Linn for her opinion (Linn is sleeping already) and Michi feeds Hans. They have a little couple moment. Aww. HANS, TREAT MICHI RIGHT. He’s cute and he makes food for you. 

I’m wondering if the whole Hans/Michi thing is going to be a parallel to Mia and Alex, where a relationship that didn’t seem feasible at first becomes something real, and maybe they’ll have some relationship difficulty when Mia and Alex do. Though in the beginning of the season Hans and Michi seemed to parallel Alex and Kiki quite clearly, or at least Mia was making that connection, so who knows.

Clip 6 - Always look before crossing

Mia is leaving for school in the morning, and who should be there but Alex with two drinks in his hands. Rosehip tea or cocoa if he’s feeling sentimental. 

We don’t hear what he’s saying because Mia has her earbuds in, so it’s just the faintest sound of his voice over the music. She ignores him and goes to unlock her bike, he keeps talking, she points to her earbuds to indicate that she’s not listening. We see him mouth “please” and she finally takes out her earbuds and accepts the drink. Which I would too, because I’m shameless and thirsty and I wouldn’t turn down a free warm beverage in the morning.

There’s a little editing blip because in the clip, the music doesn’t cut out right as she takes out the earbuds, it’s a moment or two later when she puts them in her pockets. They fixed it in the full episode, though, and it cuts out when she takes out the earbuds.

Alex clearly sees Mia taking the drink as a victory and smiles. They walk along side by side by a moment until Mia calls him out for being spoiled and doing whatever he wants and not owning up to it. He says they were drunk. Wait, so he DID do it???? And he says she’s blowing it way out of proportion?? I’m surprised because I thought we’d learn that Alex didn’t do it after all. It seemed too obvious, Kiki was so eager to blame him that it seemed like a misdirect. And I mean, I don’t think it’s right that he and the others are making the entire graduating class reap the consequences, but I don’t think the prank is an unforgivable thing he did in itself. 

They argue a little and she’s about to bike across the road when Alex grabs her and pulls her back just as a car goes by, honking. She’s like … this doesn’t change anything. Alex is like, well it kinda does. “I saved your life, Mia Winter!” Well, she was distracted by him in the first place, so consider it even? (I binge-watched Russian Doll on Netflix this weekend so I can’t help but think this moment could have taken a drastically different turn.)

Mia bikes away but is smiling, which is awfully chipper for someone who just had a brush with death. I would be in the fetal position the rest of the day.

Alex stares after her and walks in the other direction. Errr … away from the school? I assume he was going back to his car, parked closer to Mia’s place.

So that mystery was done solved pretty quickly and anti-climatically. Kinda disappointing because I think it’d be fun to drag it out just a teensy tiny bit more - the mystery element of Skam is something that’s really underrated, when you think about it, even though it’s a large part of what kept people watching in real time.

Clip 7 - Sam just drops a bomb

We get a closeup of Sam blowing a bubble with her gum and then popping it. Like how she’s about to burst that bubble about Mia and Alex? 

The girls are discussing the prank and that Alexander was in on it. Kiki is like, I knew it. Damn, she really wants him to go down. I don’t blame her, though.

When Amira asks how Mia knows, Sam says Alexander probably told her. WHOA HOLD THE PHONE. Druck is throwing curveballs everywhere this episode. I did not expect to see Sam reveal this information so quickly and casually; I thought she’d save it for a more dramatic moment later on, after Mia and Alex definitely were a thing. Sam says Mia is always talking to him, and Mia rushes to explain that it was all because of Kiki (lies) and she told him what she thought of him (well, that part is true) and that Leonie told her about Alexander (another lie - not looking good for Mia).

All the girls get a text at the same time. Sam says her battery sucks so we conveniently get Hanna reading the text out loud for us viewers. Alexander has arranged a benefit concert to make up for the damage so no one has to pay extra. BOY SAM WILL BE PERFORMING, and there will be a surprise musical act, too. I’m just glad to see the toilet man again. 

The girls are excited and Hanna’s like, TIME TO STOP STUDYING. I don’t think she needs much of an excuse, really.

Alex texts Mia to say if she doesn’t come tomorrow, he’ll cancel everything 😊 GODDAMMIT. I realize Alexander is supposed to be a dickhead, but do we really have to keep this manipulative crap? Can he not just be like … arrogant and jerkish without that element?

Kiki looks at Mia getting another text, and you can see the suspicion all over her face. Sam’s comment struck a match.

Clip 8 - Mia crosses that bridge, y’all

I love when we get a long-ass Friday clip, thanks, Druck!

Mia shows up to the benefit concert by herself, and Toilet Sam is rapping onstage. Hello again! She runs into Kiki and says she’ll join the group in a minute. Does she need to talk to Alexander first?

We see Mia putting on that bright red lipstick in the mirror. I am sure she’s doing it just because she likes the color and not because there are any Alexander-related motivations that she would never admit.

Mia notices Alex skulking across the club and staring at her like some kind of Edward Cullen wannabe. It’s only episode 5, I guess they still have time to pull off a sudden vampire twist. (And I mean ... Alexander did just pull Mia out of the path of a car ... a Twilight parallel if I ever saw one.)

Of course Alex sends her a text telling her she looks gorgeous. It looks like he wants her to drink with him; however, Sarah comes up to him and gives him a hug and kisses him on the cheek and talks to him. He doesn’t look very enthused, but Mia smirks and shakes her head at him. That Alexander, up to his old tricks! Between that and the copy orgy I’m sure she’s thinking Alexander and Sarah have a thing.

People dance and drink to Toilet Sam’s performance. We see Jonas getting really wasted, and Matteo seems kinda done with it, so it’s Hanna who pulls drunk Jonas off the dance floor, and he tries to kiss her. MY HEART. But she pushes him back and asks what’s up with him. He says, you’re what’s up with me. THE ANGST. I said this last season, but Anselm Bresgott is a great actor. He’s able to convey a lot of vulnerability with his eyes. 

When this happened I thought that maybe instead of drunk Eva/Vilde makeouts we would get sad intoxicated Jonas trying to kiss Matteo in this clip, and I was all for THE ANGST that would bring. Either that or Jonas was gonna make out with Toilet Sam. 

(He did not make out with either of them - yet - but it’s OK because there turned out to be enough of THE ANGST as it was.)

Alexander comes onstage and Toilet Sam gives him a shout-out for organizing, and that they beat their goal (by almost half, awesome). They’re giving the rest of the money to plant trees on campus, to make up for all the dead ones they spent showcasing students’ genitalia. How noble!

Sarah is the surprise performance of the night! So her contact with Alexander was not necessarily about them hooking up, but perhaps her thanking him for giving her the opportunity? Sarah sings idontwannabeyouanymore by Billie Eilish. 

After some more eye contact with Alexander, Mia leaves the room and goes upstairs. But Alexander stands in her path and won’t let her go to the bathroom. Come on, dude. You’ve been doing some things right but this episode you’re doing all these little entitled things.

He’s like, Mia, what do you want. He fixed everything? Everyone’s happy, so what’s her problem? LMAO again at this entitled attitude. She owes him nothing! The thing is - even if she really really likes him and wants to kiss him and be with him - she still owes him nothing! She’s allowed not to act on her feelings because she feels it’s a bad idea! Get out of here with this attitude that Mia is doing him wrong because she likes him but won’t give in and be with him.

He lets down his hood and rakes his hand through his hair in a strangely vampire-ish way, and says there’s something between them. He likes her a lot, but he’s tired of these games. Dude, you’re the one starting many of these games now. Yeah, Mia is definitely responsible for much of what happened earlier in the season, and she could certainly be better about not contacting him, but he’s also the one showing up at her place with a drink and telling her he’ll call everything off if she doesn’t show up to the benefit. He gives her the lines about if she doesn’t like him, say it to his face and he’ll leave her alone forever. Just as he says that, Kiki comes out of the bathroom, and there’s some heavy eye contact between her and Mia, and oh right, that’s what Mia doesn’t like him, that’s why Mia can’t be with him.

Heh, he put down his hoodie to confess to her, because he was being open about his feelings, and then when she’s rejected him, he puts it back up. He’s ~putting up his wall again. 

Mia then goes into the bathroom and has a mini-breakdown, as the song switches from the cover to the original. She’s teary, she’s wiping off her lipstick. Props again to Milena because she’s really selling this season. She looks for some toilet paper, but there’s only the cardboard for the roll. So she goes in her purse for something and comes up with the Post-It Alex left her about Hotel Hardenberg. Ahhhh, now that’s a nice little detail. I’m one of those people who just ... does not clean out her purse until she buys a new purse, lmao, so I can imagine Mia shoved it in there and forgot about it, without being very sentimental about it at the time. But I like that it came back at this crucial moment.

Mia grabs her coat and runs out of the club after him. When she catches up to him, they’re on opposite sides of a bridge, so we know what’s gonna happen. Someone’s gotta cross, or they have to meet in the middle.

She says it’s cold, he offers her a beanie, she comes forward and shows her own beanie, they both put on beanies at the same time. It’s a big beanie fest. What’s important that Mia crossed the bridge and closed the gap. The symbolism is obvious, but ... well, it’s there.

She says that she likes him, but doesn’t want to like him. He’s an egocentric prick, but then he was clever and funny and nice that one Friday, but then he disappears for a week and pulls that stunt copying his dick and plastering it around the school. Alex is like, who said that was my dick? Mia is like, well whose dick was it? Alex nods over her shoulder and we see Jonas stumbling around drunk as fuck. LMAO. Mia had Jonas’ dick pic in her backpack. She was going around thinking she got a glimpse of Alexander’s junk, showing it off to her roommate, and it was Jonas’ all along! And Hanna didn’t notice it was Jonas’ dick??? 

I mean, now I get why Alexander and Jonas bonded so quickly. They’re dick twins, if Kiki can mistake one for the other. I’m sure there’s some situation where that would come in handy (no pun intended?) 

Are the two of you going to help out this completely drunk Jonas who’s by himself and who’s wandering into the street before he gets hit by a car or something...

Alex is like, do I look like someone who whips out his dick when he’s drunk? (I mean...) His penis needs to stay an enigma. Okay, goddammit, that’s funny. But Mia correctly points out that every other girl at school knows his penis, so it’s not an enigma.

When Alex is like, now what, Mia looks past him and says, “Fuck,” and when he turns back to her she’s kissing him. Damn, she’s so smooth. They dramatically kiss and he doinks his forehead against hers, it’s quite sweet. Then Alex goes off into the night, probably to find a few necks to drain. He rummages around in his coat for a moment, making quite a show, and of course it’s his middle finger he finds and flashes at Mia. Flipping each other off becoming their romantic couples’ gesture? I’m here for it. 

He also does a little skip hop as he goes. Mia looks after him, smiling. Oh, Mia. Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

So that shot during the end credits, of her looking outside at something, is not her in the first kiss scene! When will any of these moments happen?

Social Media/General Comments

The week long hiatus was explained in-universe as an “insta detox” among the girls. Matteo did not let that stop him from posting his regularly scheduled memes, though. #fuckinstadetox

Hanna texts Matteo about why Jonas and Alex are acting all buddy-buddy, which we see in the clips, too. Matteo says he doesn’t know. I thought it was meant to be a red herring and that Alex was probably not directly involved in the prank, but Jonas probably was, and maybe Jonas decided to bro it up with Alex since he liked his motto. Except then Alex turned out to have participated in the prank. I guess their friendship escalated when Jonas had his dick out on the copy machine.

But I like seeing a William have friendly interactions with other characters. That was something I thought was kind of lacking with him in Skam, that we didn’t get a ton of insight into his other friendships. He didn’t seem to care much about Noora’s friends, and he was close with P-Chris obviously, but there wasn’t a ton of detail there as to why or what their relationship was like outside of girl drama. I understand that not every character has to be extroverted and buddy-buddy with others, but it makes me think a lot more of Alex as a person when we see him forming bonds with people who he does not want to bone.

Matteo then texted Jonas about the thing between him and Alex, and Jonas jokes that he couldn’t resist Alex’s face. Matteo is jealous! But totally not really jealous, you know, JOKING jealous. Totally. And when Jonas teases him about it, he says there’s no reason to be, Matteo is the only little bitch in his life. I legit want to pass out. And I think Matteo did too, because he sent back a heart emoji. Six minutes later. What happened in those six minutes? Was Matteo just sitting there staring at his phone, wondering how the hell to respond to that? Getting butterflies and heart palpitations in his skinny stoner body?

There are pictures of the benefit with the girl squad sans Mia ... after she left to run after Alex, maybe? ~Foreshadowing?

I’m Mia right now. I was so annoyed with little things Alexander did in this episode, and I’m still pissed at some of his past behavior, and yet I am charmed by him despite it all. It’s heavily due to the performance. I can’t believe Alexander was one of my least favorite Williams across the remakes based on the first season, and he’s skyrocketing here just by virtue of having a personality.

I also can’t believe I had doubts about Mia in the first season. She has my whole heart now, fuckups and all. 

Girl Sam and boy Sam were rapping together at benefit, according to IG. What if boy Sam replaced Kasper and made out with girl Sam in the finale, since it’s unlikely Manfred will fill that role (or at least I hope to God not)? I mean, if Kiki’s ultimately gonna be chill about Mia and Alexander, Hanna being chill about Sam and Sam wouldn’t be too much of a stretch.

In an alternate universe, this season turned into the German remake of American Vandal from here on out and we spent the next five episodes trying to figure out who covered the school in dicks.

I’m not German so please feel free to correct me/clarify stuff!

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

[feral-renaissance-cat]

Waiting Is the Hardest Part

(Turns out I’m not done processing. You can read parts one and two so this will make more sense.)

Death was proving to be terrible for Molly’s self-control. As he suspected, the flask Taliesin had given him never ran out, and neither did the box of cigarettes nor the bag of pills. He lost count of how much he drank and smoked and how many pills he swallowed, since his stomach never felt full and he never blacked out from intoxication. Furthermore he had a suspicion that the only reason he felt the effects at all was because he expected to. He didn’t dare test out this theory for fear that he would realize there was no effect and he would have to go back to being bored.

He had remained in the hazy space ever since Taliesin left. Whether it was the drugs or the nature of this strange plane, he did occasionally see what looked like some of the art and messages from the first place he had been. As before, he spoke out to the no-one so he could have something to do, and since clearly someone had listened before when it brought Taliesin to him. At first it was ramblings, but eventually he dictated his last will and testament.

“I leave my Tarot cards to Gustav. He saw something in me, so perhaps he’ll be able to see something in them as well. My swords I leave to Fjord, if the others ever rescue him. For that matter, if they rescue Jester, she can have my tapestry. I’m sure she’ll come up with some mischief to do with that thing. Yasha knows what she can have out of my stuff. Whether she’ll actually take it, I don’t know.” He took a long swig from the flask. It was a strong mead made with peach blossom honey that he had had at some fancy place that he couldn’t remember, possibly because Taliesin had never thought to give it a name. Whether the memory was real or not, the mead was good and it sent tingles through his head as though someone had struck his horns with a tuning fork.

“To... To Caleb, I leave my coat. It would clash horribly with his hair and he would look ridiculous in it, but maybe he can use it as an extra blanket on nights when he needs something to keep him cozy. To Beau, I leave the rest of my skein. She can take it herself or use it to drug someone else, either way I hope she has fun with it. Nott can have my jewelry. She might have already taken it if the others haven’t told her off for ‘disrespecting the dead’ or whatever. It’s fine, I don’t need it anymore. My money can be divided amongst the party, but some of it has to be spent buying everyone a round at the next tavern they visit.”

Molly pulled out the bag of pills. He had taken four at once the last time, and while they had caused him to see shapes in the fog while feeling very good about things, he couldn’t help but wonder what would happen if he took an entire handful. Clearly it wouldn’t kill him, but he wasn’t sure what increasing the dosage by that much would do, if it did anything at all. Though the bag felt like it only held a dozen or so pills, when he shook it into his palm he had to quickly pull it back because suddenly they were spilling everywhere. He tipped about half his handful back in, because even he wasn’t that reckless, not to mention he didn’t want to try to swallow more than fifteen at a time. He popped them into his mouth, washed them down with mead, and that’s when the visions started.

There was no way of discerning direction in this place, so Molly simply went where his feet took him. He saw shapes in the fog again, but this time he walked towards them. The fog parted to reveal what appeared to be Pumat Sol in a tutu waving a magic wand over Nott’s head. A shower of glittering dust fell around her and she transformed into a lovely young halfling woman in a simple peasant’s dress. Her mask fell to the ground and shattering into a thousand pieces.

“Nott?” Molly asked. “Are you okay?”

Neither Nott nor Pumat Sol paid him any attention. Nott was too busy frolicking in her new dress and Pumat Sol was shaking hands with three other versions of himself that had just appeared. Molly kept walking.

Next he came across a small cabin in what appeared to be some backwoods clearing. Yasha was chopping wood with her sword. Beau sat on the cabin’s porch in an unbuttoned flannel shirt whittling some small figurine. Molly went up to Beau and waved his hand in front of her face. She kept whittling. Molly turned around. Yasha was no longer chopping wood. Instead she was using her sword to cut the heads off gnolls before tossing them into a pile already taller than she was. Molly hastily fled.

The next scene was far more serene. Fjord and Jester were sitting side by side on a bed. Fjord had his arm around Jester’s shoulders. Jester was cradling a tiny baby with sea-green skin and budding horns on its forehead, and it was sucking the end of its tail the way some babies sucked their thumbs. Molly had never seen Fjord smile like this. However, as Molly got a closer look he noticed one of Fjord’s eyes had no iris; it was simply an oblong pupil in a glowing yellow orb. Molly didn’t even bother speaking. He just left.

In the distance Molly could make out the shape of Taliesin. He was speaking with a cloaked figure. Though the hood of the cloak was up, Molly could see that the figure had bandages tightly wound around his eyes. Molly said nothing, and yet the figure still looked up in his direction with those unseen eyes, if there were any eyes beneath the bandages at all. Molly ran before Taliesin could notice him.

Molly was starting to pray that the drugs would wear off soon. Taking that many had been a terrible idea. It wasn’t until Molly spotted three other figures through the fog that he realized he hadn’t seen Caleb yet. “Caleb?” he called, stumbling forward.

It was Caleb, or so Molly assumed. This man had the same color hair, like the last dying embers of a fire, the same nose and chin and his eyes were the same shape, but he was...clean. He wore the uniform of an imperial mage, his beard was neatly trimmed, and his posture was tall and confident. He was flanked by an older man and older woman. The man had streaks of ember-colored hair amidst his grey and his nose was the same shape as Caleb’s. The woman had Caleb’s eyes and a similar pattern of freckles across her face. They were dressed far more modestly, but the hems of their clothes were blackened and smoldering.

Caleb’s eyes turned to Molly, except they weren’t Caleb’s eyes. These had a hard gaze that made Molly’s insides turn cold. A smirk spread across the man’s face. “Mr. Mollymauk,” he said. It was Caleb’s voice, but usually when Caleb called him that Molly couldn’t hold back a smile. Now Molly wished above all else that Caleb would have ignored him like the others. The man held out one hand. “Come to receive your judgement?”

“J-Judgement? For what?”

The man chuckled as he walked forwards. A pit opened in Molly’s heart and all his hopes fell through it. “I am sorry it had to be me, but those who commit crimes against the Empire must be punished.”

He was within arm’s reach of Molly. Molly took the man’s face in his hands. “Caleb, what did they do to you?” He had wanted to see Caleb whole again someday, but not like this. Never like this. It was as though all the empty spaces between his cracks had been filled with malice.

Caleb gently yet firmly pushed Molly’s arms down. “We must make an example of criminals such as yourself.” He put one hand over Molly’s heart. His smirk twisted into a gruesome grin. Lorenzo’s voice came out of his mouth. “An example it is.” Flames spread from his fingertips. Molly tried to back away but he was transfixed by the sadistic look on the man’s face. That horrible smile, those eyes reflecting the fire that was now burning through Molly’s chest, it was too much. Molly closed his eyes and screamed as the searing pain ate its way to his heart.

Then it was over. Molly felt cold, so so cold. He opened his eyes, but everything was total darkness. He blinked, but it made no difference. No matter which way he turned, no matter how hard he strained his eyes, there was nothing. Absolutely nothing. And Mollymauk knew.

It was the darkness of the grave.

Molly hyperventilated. He wanted to scream but his chest felt crushed. He reached out his hands. Not only could he not see them, but they found nothing, not the lid of a coffin nor thick soil, simply nothing.

The silence was suddenly broken by a cracking thunderous sound, like boulders falling from the sky one at a time. They fell all around him, but Molly could not see them nor tell where they came from. He lost count of them, and over time he thought it would never end.

Then the hush returned. Molly was terrified that he had gone deaf as well as blind. Just as he was about to call for help, there was a voice. The voice was all around him, louder than the thundering boulders from before. Somehow it sounded like the voices of nearly every person he had ever met speaking at once, though with an underlying timbre that shook him to his core.

“Mollymauk Tealeaf, it is time to go.”

[huntertales]

Part Two: Fate is a Cruel Mistress. (My Heart Will Go On S06E17)

Episode Summary: After Balthazar changes history and keeps the Titanic from sinking, Fate intervenes and begins killing those who would have died on the ship. Castiel tells the reader, Sam and Dean that Fate is upset with the three of them and the only way they can stay alive is to kill her. Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader Word Count: 5,131.

Previous Part | Supernatural Rewrite Masterlist

Two dead bodies and a piece of gold string found at each crime scene, it was about the best lead you and the boys had going for. Along with the fact that the poor people had their lives cut short from a fatal “accident” that left you scratching your head in a bit of confusion. Nobody got beheaded by their garage door and it was more than just bad luck for someone to get choked by a fax machine after their keys somehow got misplaced behind there and their scarf got caught in the thing. But you had no valid proof something supernatural caused this to happen. There was no EMF to detect a pissed off spirit, no traces of sulfur or even a lingering smell and no hex bag to rat out a witch seeking a bit of revenge. All of it appeared to be accidental. But in the words of Dean himself, accidents just don’t happen “accidentally.”

You and the boys headed back to the motel to reevaluate the evidence that you did have and try to dig deeper on the family history of the two victims that was a little too squeaky clean. You decided while you sat at the table with Sam, both of your laptops open, and little help from the internet to guide you to an answer, there was somebody who might know something. When in doubt, you always called Bobby when you were in a pinch. But you were smart enough than to call him up when he was in such a mood. So you settled for the very next best thing—Ellen. She happily answered the phone when she noticed your incoming call.

You explained to Ellen about the situation going on, from the strange accidental deaths and the piece of gold thread pinched between your fingers. When she asked you to describe it, you tilted your head to the side and tried your hardest. “So, we found another piece of this, I don't know,” You shrugged your shoulders, not sure what kind of adjectives you could describe a piece of thread “Shiny string. It was at both scenes.”

"Oh, I was afraid of that." Ellen mumbled. You dropped the hand holding the string to the laptop keyboard, asking her why. "Oh, these so-called accidents—we're seeing 'em nationwide. About seventy-five so far. I got Jo and her crew working on a cluster in California."

"Blood relatives?" You presumed, wondering if this thing was a curse that was affecting families. But the biggest question was why people were dropping like flies because of some crazy accident. And why the hell a piece of string was left at each scene, like it was the calling card of some sick and twisted monster claiming its work.

“Some yeah, some no.” Ellen said. “She's got about what you do—pile of bodies and a whole bunch of gold thread.”

“So what's it mean?” You asked the woman.

“I don't know.” Ellen admitted. “I got Bobby working on it right now.”

You twirled the piece of string between your fingers and stared at your laptop screen, suddenly becoming worried at the mention of the man who had raised you since you were ten. You'd seen him with his ups and downs, but never bad as this. "How's he doing, by the way?" You curiously asked, trying your hardest not to worry Ellen from the sound of your voice.

“Oh, don't worry, Y/N.” Ellen reassured you. “I'm kicking his ass back to health and happiness.”

"Who asked you to? To hell with you." Bobby’s voice echoed from the other line, his crude and sarcastic attitude clear as day. The ends of your lips stretched into a faint smile deciding to take it as a sign he was doing all right. And you felt more reassured that he wouldn’t be alone during such a hard time in his life. Ever since Ellen had come into his life, she’d been nothing but good for him. And everyone else, too.

“I heard that.” You said, calling Bobby out on his rude behavior. Ellen chuckled at what unfolded and reassured you once again that he would be okay. But you knew Rufus’ untimely death didn’t just affect the older hunter. It was taking a toll on all of you. You couldn’t help but ask the woman out of concern, “Are you okay?”

"Aw, honey, you're sweet." Ellen mumbled. "You know me. I just worry about you boys."

"Yeah, well. We're all doing fine." You said. You looked up from your laptop screen to see Sam was diligently working on his laptop as Dean sat across the room on his bed, silently watching TV. You pushed yourself up to your feet and began walking over to Dean, taking the liberty to take a much needed break from your laptop and plopped yourself down on his bed. "All right, so, all these corpses, anything relate 'em?”

"Well, actually, I did dig up one thing. I just don't know what to make of it." Ellen. You hummed quietly, informing her that you were listening to what she had to say. You continued on the conversation while you mindlessly watched whatever sort of show Dean was watching. "Well, it's a weird one, and it was buried pretty deep, but Bobby and me were combing through the family trees on all the victims, and we started seeing, well, the families all came over to America the same year."

“Really? That is weird.” You noted.

"Yeah. 1912. But here's the real weird part.” Ellen said, getting to the part where you would get a kick out of. “They all came over on the same boat."

You furrowed your brow slightly, finding that bit of information way too strange for that to be a coincidence. That might be the connection to what was going on here. Only you had no possible information to make such a theory. “All right, so what's so special about the boat?”

“Nothing. It was a boat.” Ellen said. “It did what boats do.”

“What was it called?” You asked.

"The Titanic. Did you ever hear of it?" She wondered, you told her no. You weren't familiar with the name. If it was just a boat that sailed across the sea, then why the hell was it killing off its passengers families nearly a century later? And for no apparent reason, you might add. "Yeah, me neither. I'll keep digging."

You exchanged your goodbyes to the woman and ended the conversation with more information that you had to start. You thought for a moment to yourself while you sat up in bed, Dean's arm wrapped loosely around your waist, trying to somehow keep you here for a little while longer. You remained where you were, trying to think of you knew anything about this boat, if you might have learned it in school or not. There had to be something. But your mind was coming up blank on this one.

"Hey, guys," You spoke up, getting each of their attention. "Does the name Titanic ring a bell?"

Dean thought about it for a few seconds before answering no. Sam took a little longer, but even his big brain of his, the man couldn't recollect on any sort of information that connected to the Titanic. You unwillingly stepped away from the bed and Dean's embrace and back to the rickety old chair and your laptop. It took a few minutes of searching the Titanic to find a complete website dedicated to the boat. Skimming the information, you picked out what seemed slightly interesting and read it back to the boys.

"Okay, so, the RMS Titanic was the largest passenger steamship in the world when it made its maiden voyage across the North Atlantic in 1912." You read off the first paragraph you found.

“So what's the big friggin' deal?” Dean asked, not seeing what the big fuss was all about. “It's a ship. It sailed.”

"On the evening of April 14, 1912 the Titanic had a dangerously close call with an iceberg. Only the sharp eyes of the First Mate, Mr. I.P. Freely saved the ship from disaster. Despite the late hour, and poor visibility conditions, Mr. Freeley spotted the iceberg which was almost one hundred (100) feet high and four hundred (400) feet long. Emergency maneuvers averted what would surely have been a disastrous collusion. Freeley was hailed a hero by the passengers and crew.”

"Looks like there was a close call. Ship almost hit an iceberg. Luckily the first mate spotted it just in time." You said, telling the boys about the near fatal crash that took the ship down. You read more of the paragraph that told of the dangerous night that almost ended in disaster. The more you read, the more eerily strange from the coincidence. Dean looked you, wondering why you were staring at the laptop screen with a bit of a confused expression. “Uh, this first mate. Mr I.P. Freeley.”

"Well, that's not suspicious. You got a picture of old Freeley?" Dean asked. You scrolled through the website where you found a grainy black and white picture of the crew. Clicking on it, you pulled up a bigger version, and of the man dubbed a hero. Who you saw made your face drop in slight twinge of annoyance. Dean headed over as Sam leaned over the table to get a good look himself. It didn't take long for Sam to have the same reaction as you did. All Dean needed to do was take a quick glance to realize why the man looked so familiar. He let out a frustrated sigh. "Balthazar."

You didn’t have a very good friendship with Balthazar. He had a knack for elaborate, over the top schemes you and the boys always seemed to get in the middle of. You weren't the least bit surprised to see that he had landed himself in more trouble. His choices and bad plans to only benefit him were inconvenient and annoying, but this...whatever sort of trick was up his sleeve, it was causing the lives of too many people. You and the boys decided to have a friendly chat with him. However, in order to get into contact with angel, praying wasn’t a valid option for you. So you chose to summon him.

The process wasn’t an easy one. You shut the curtains to give the three of you privacy while the boys moved the table across the room to give all of you more room. You removed the laptops from the table so Sam could place down a bowl full of all sorts of ingredients after Dean drew a few familiar sigils in chalk. To add the final touch, you lit a match against the box before throwing it into the bowl, watching as the flame ignited before dying down. You looked around the room to see that things were working when you noticed the lights began to flicker, a few bulbs even burst from what was about to happen.

“Boys, boys, boys. And the lovely, always delightful Y/N.” Balthazar’s familiar accent filled the room, signaling his arrival. You turned around to see the angel himself. Your lips stretched into a frown. “Whatever can I do for you?”

“We need to talk.” You informed the angel.

"Oh," Balthazar mumbled. He took notice of your body language, crossed arms over your chest and annoyed glare, to realize you summoned him on not so good terms. "You seem upset, Y/N."

“I kind of am. You see, the boys and I are working this case. And you know whose face I come across while doing research for this case?” You asked him. Before Balthazar could try and give a sarcastic answer, you tell him. “Yours! What the hell is with the boat, Balthazar.”

“What boat are you possibly referring to, darling? I’ve been around for a very long time. Seen a lot of boats.” Balthazar said. You narrowed your eyes on him in annoyance at his response. “Be more specific, that’s all I’m asking.”

“The Titanic.” You told him in a sharp tone. “Ring any bells?”

“Oh. Ja. The Titanic. Yes, well, uh, it was meant to sink, and I saved it.” Balthazar explained to all of you. His voice was all too casual, acting as if he was talking about the weather. You raised your brow slightly from what you just heard and asked him what he meant by that. “Well it was meant to bash into this iceberg thing and plunge into the briny deep with all this hoopla, and I saved it. Anything else I can answer for you?”

“Why?” Sam asked the angel.

Balthazar looked at the younger Winchester with a bit of a confused expression by his question, “Why what?”

“Why did you un-sink the ship?” Dean asked again more clearly this time, and a little bit slower. Due to the fact that he was trying to keep his patience.

“Oh, because I hated the movie.” Balthazar said.

Your face scrunched up slightly, “What movie?”

Balthazar let out a laugh, “Exactly.”  

“Wait, so you saved a cruise liner because—“ Sam said, trying to wrap his head around what he was hearing.

“Because that God-awful Celine Dion song made me want to smite myself.” Balthazar said. You and the boys grew confused at the name the angel mentioned. “Before you waste your time asking, she’s not important. Thanks to my wonderful plan she's a destitute lounge singer somewhere in Quebec, and let's keep it that way, please.”

"Okay, I didn't think that was possible." Sam said. "I thought you couldn't change history."

"Oh, haven't you noticed? There's no more rules, boys." Balthazar said. The angel grew a smirk at his plan that he thought was oh, so brilliant. Only it was causing all sorts of problems. But you highly doubted Balthazar thought that far ahead to get whatever he wanted.

"Wow. The nerve on you." Sam mumbled. He slowly shook his head and scoffed at what he was hearing from the angel. "So you just, what, un-sunk a giant boat?"

"Oh come on. I saved people.” Balthazar defended himself against the younger Winchester and his judgemental glare. “I thought you loved that kind of thing."

"Yeah, but now those people and their kids and their kids' kids, they must have interacted with so many other people, changed so much crap. You totally Butterfly-Affected history!" Sam said. He pointed out the big, glaring flaw Balthazar refused to think about to get his own way.

"Dude. Dude." Dean mumbled, getting his brother's attention. You rolled your eyes from what he felt the need to bring up at a time like this. "Rule one, no Kutcher references."

"Ah, yes. Unfortunately, there's still an Ashton Kutcher. And you still averted the Apocalypse, and there are still Archangels. But, thanks to me, I made it a bit harder for them to do it. It’s just the small details that are different, like you don't drive an Impala.” Balthazar said. Your face scrunched up slightly at the mention of a car you don’t think you’ve ever heard of. The angel spoke up quickly, not feeling the need to waste time on unimportant knowledge. “Yes, yes. ‘What's an Impala?’ Trust me, it's not important. You see, Y/N wasn’t supposed to be raised by Bobby. Along with the fact that Ellen and Jo aren’t supposed to be alive.”

"Wait, what?" You asked the angel, suddenly becoming way too confused at what was going on here to keep up with what he was explaining. Balthazar walked over to the small kitchen area where he spotted a bottle of unopened whiskey. He took it upon himself to pour himself a drink

while you thought more about what he said. "What do you mean?”

“You see, your darling mother—Ella, right? She was supposed to end up with a different man that you think is your real father, who died when you were six. A whole bunch of nonsense. Basically you’re supposed to be a half demon. The apocalypse was supposed to go a

other way. A bunch of things.” Balthazar said. He twisted off the top to the whiskey and poured a drink while he explained. “Luckily I tipped off a cherub to point his magic arrow somewhere else so you could be raised by Bobby, who you always went on about being your ‘real’ father. And, of course there was that whole ordeal with Ellen and Jo.”

“What?” You mumbled, your voice suddenly growing eerily quiet.

"Ella wasn't supposed to have died when you were a kid and by that hound. She was supposed to sell her soul, sell her husband's soul and all that jazz. Ellen and Jo are supposed to be dead.” Balthazar said. “You see, I save a boat, those peoples' kids have kids, your mother falls in love with someone else, one thing leads to another, which leads to another thousand things, and yada, yada, yada. To cut a long story short, they don't die in a massive explosion and you three get to grow up together. Let's agree I did a good thing. One less Billy Zane movie and I saved two of your closest friends.”

You weren't sure what the hell was going on anymore. Your way into this world and upbringing wasn't a usual one. You learned when you were in your early twenties that your mother made a deal with Azazel, a yellow eyed demon responsible for the tragedy in your life, to have a child after she couldn't get pregnant. Deals only brought ten years. Your mother thought she could try and outrun a hellhound. You remembered on your tenth birthday you were in the process of moving, somewhere far away. It had been just the two of you since your father was killed in a car accident when you were six years old. She just wanted a normal life.

But your mother’s idea of a perfect life was cut short when she was ripped apart by a hellhound. And you heard it all. All you remembered about the tragedy was locking yourself in a closet, petrified you would mauled by a beast you could hear, but couldn’t see. John Winchester and Bobby found you a few days after your mother died. While John had his hands full with his own two sons, Bobby couldn't stomach the idea of letting you out of his sight, so he took you in. He'd been your father figure ever since then. You didn't know what you'd do without him, but hearing all of this from Balthazar, about how things were supposed to be different, the room felt like it was spinning.

"But now somebody is killing the descendants of the survivors." Sam said, his voice bringing you back into the situation right in front of you. Balthazar raised his brow, wondering why he should care about such a thing. "And that's maybe, like, fifty thousand people."

Balthazar continued to stare at the three of you with a blank expression, “And?”

“And we need to save as many people as we can, but we need to know who's after them.” The older Winchester explained the situation a bit more clearly for Balthazar to understand without really having to think about the mess he just made.

“Oh, uh, sorry, uh. You have me confused with the other angel—you know, the one in the dirty trench coat who's in love with you. I...don't care.” Balthazar spoke the last three words rather slowly, making sure you and the boys would get the message so you wouldn’t bug him again. You scoffed as he took a long sip of his drink to finish it up. “Goodbye, boys. And it’s been a pleasure, Y/N.”

"Whoa, whoa, wait, wait, wait, wait." Dean said, trying to get the angel to stay for a few more minutes. He stepped forward in an attempt to try and stop Balthazar, but when you blinked, the angel vanished from your sight, leaving you to clean up the mess he made. "Son of a bitch!"

+ + +

After you were left high and dry by Balthazar, you and the boys tried to figure out the extent of the consequences you were left to deal with by the angel after he unsank a boat for the sake of keeping a movie from being made and a lounge singer from seeking fame. The most troubling fact you had to break to Bobby was about Ellen and Jo and their...different path. You knew it was going to break his heart to hear the news. You tried to postpone it far as you could while you explained the situation to the older hunter on speaker phone.

"So, Balthazar un-sank a boat, and now we got a boatload of people who should never have been born." Bobby said, recapping the information you and the boys told him over the past few minutes.

"Yeah. Like fifty-thousand." Sam said, giving the haunting number of people you were supposed to try and save. The older hunter's response wasn't what you were anticipating. He seemed casual, saying that all of this made sense. "How does any of this make sense?”

“Because I got an idea who we're up against. Fate." Bobby said. Fate was a word that meant everything happens for a reason, why your life ended the way it did was because that's how the reality of things were written out. You always thought of the word as a concept, something someone higher up chose, like God himself. It turned out fate might not be a concept, more of a person in charge of how things turned out.. "I mean Fate, like the Fates. Or one of 'em, at least."

“You mean like Greek mythology?” You wondered. “Like the sisters?”

You could thank all of your knowledge about the things that went bump in the night on Bobby. He taught you everything you needed to know. And you spent most of your time reading the dusty books cluttered all over his house. What else was a girl to do? Dean's mumbled remark of calling you a nerd didn't go unnoticed. You gave him a look as you lightly kicked him in the shin.

“These ladies are responsible for how you go down, literally. So if you get creamed by a garage door or crunched by a copy machine, they're the ones who hammer out the details of how you die. Spin out your fate on a piece of pure gold." Bobby explained to all of you. You realized the gold thread found at each scene of where the victims had died was for a reason. It made sense from what Bobby was saying. "And then one of 'em writes it all down in her Day Runner of Death. It's high-level stuff. Anyway—fits. Now we know what Balthazar did. It seems to me that maybe Fate is just trying to clean up the mess."

Sam asked the question on everyone’s mind, "So, how do we stop it?"

“How do we stop Fate? Good question.” Bobby said.

"Well, there's got to be a way." Dean said, thinking there had to be a loophole of some sort.

“Or there ain't. I mean, this is Fate we're talking about here. You know, the easiest way would be to get that angel to re-sink the boat.” Bobby said. You found yourself shooting down the idea in a heartbeat before he could try and suggest it again. “Big difference between dying awful and never being born, Y/N.”

“We are not sinking the boat, Bobby. Okay?" You told him in a tone of voice that you didn’t want to hear anymore of this. You never spoke to Bobby like this. But you didn’t want to change the way things were, the way you grew up to think that this was how it was meant to be. You knew things were more complicated than you could handle, but you’d deal with it. “Don't even think about it."

"Well, okay. What's got you biting my head off? Normally you're all about doing the right thing." Bobby said. You let out a quiet sigh as you found your gaze lingering over to the boys, as if you were hoping for some guidance on what to say next. Bt they looked overwhelmed themselves at what the right thing to do was. So, you told the man that it was nothing. Bobby didn't believe your excuse. "Try that again?"

"Look, it doesn't even really matter, but..." Dean decided to spare you from breaking the bad news when he spoke up, however he found himself growing silent for a moment, not wanting to tell the man the bitter truth. But, he forced himself to. "Apparently, a crapload of dominoes get tipped over if the Titanic goes down. And, uh, bottom line—Ellen and Jo die.”

The other line suddenly went quiet when Dean told the older hunter the news. You bit the inside of your cheek as you imagined what must have been going through his mind right now. Bobby and Ellen had been married for over a year now, since the apocalypse wrapped up. Both of them were head over heels in love with each other. Ellen was like a mother you never had, and Bobby was a father figure to you since you were little. The thought of things being different made you feel uneasy. When Bobby spoke up a few moments later, his response to the information wasn’t the least bit surprising.

"Okay, you three. Listen up." Bobby spoke up, his voice dead serious. "You make sure... Keep those angels from sinking that boat. Do you understand me?”

You and the boys agreed with the plan. You ended the call on that note, only you found yourself feeling more overwhelmed at what you were ahead of. Along with the fact that you had no clue how the hell to fix any of this. You tossed the phone to the bed and let out a loud sigh.

"He's bad enough without her." You mumbled. "Think how he'd be if she was gone."

"Yeah." Sam sighed, knowing the situation ahead of you was going to be a moral dilemma. "So, what do we do? I mean, how do we save fifty-thousand people?"

“I got no freaking clue.” Dean said.

“We don't even know who they are.” Sam added more details you didn’t want to think about.

You were about to let out another sigh from the trouble ahead of you as you turned your head slightly in the direction of the nightstand. You noticed something sitting on the ledge, leaning forward, you realized it was the pamphlet Dean grabbed from the office of one Sean Russo. A dick in a shiny suit—who might be the next victim of Fate. And your only possible lead in stopping this situation before it could get any worse than it already was.

+ + +

The next morning you and the boys decided to stake out Russo's office to catch him off guard this time. You called his secretary, posing as a potential client, asking when he'd be available, big surprise to hear that he was all booked with appointments. You watched from the backseat window as car passed by every so often, blocking your view of the front door to the office. It was a little over an hour of waiting before you spotted Russo. He was making his way out with a client from the looks of it, who looked in terrible shape from the neck brace and cane he had to use while walking. You scoffed at how Russo acted. He just radidated bad vibes.

You and the boys got out from the car to tail Russo in attempt to get his attention. While you and the boys called out the man’s name to get his attention, the man was at least twenty feet ahead of you, too wrapped up in his phone conversation that he took to acknowledge either one of you.

"I don't care. Send him a fruitcake." Russo said to the person on the other line. You tried to get the man's attention when you called out his name a little louder, but he continued to chat into his phone, getting closer to the end of the sidewalk to cross the street. You had a feeling he was too wrapped up in his conversation to look both ways. "Who's the judge? Ah, no. 20 bucks. Believe me, this guy—he owes me."

“Russo, stop!”

You took no chances when you called out his name on the top of your lungs. While you did get his attention, it was at the possibly worst time. You looked to see that there was a van speeding down the road, showing no signs of breaking for pedestrians. Before Russo could become roadkill, Dean lunged forward, saving the day by grabbing ahold of the man and roughly shoving him to the sidewalk, getting him out of the way. Russo went tumbling to the ground as his cell phone bounced a foot or so away.

The driver slammed on his breaks, exactly where Russo was just standing a few moments ago. If none of you had acted when you did, Russo would have been good as dead. But it seemed the man wasn't feeling gratitude for your act of heroism.

"Get off of me." Russo ordered, pushing away Sam's awaiting hand to help the man back up on his feet. You gave Russo a dirty look when he snatched his phone away from your grip after you generously picked it up for him. "And you—I told you and your creepy friend to leave me alone, didn't I?”

"Look, we're just trying to help you out, okay?" You said, Russo scoffed at your excuse.

“Help me?! You almost killed me, you lunatic. Unbelievable." Russo grumbled underneath his breath. You gave him a dirty look at how he was acting as he began attempting to walk across the street now that it was clear of any cars. Dean tried to get the man's attention, causing Russo to stop in the middle of the street. "Just be glad I'm not suing your a—!"

Russo would never be able to finish his passive threat, and those would the last words he would ever get the chance to say. Things turned for the worst at what happened next. Nobody saw it coming. A bus came hurtling down the street, going too fast to stop for the idiot that stepped into the road and didn’t move when the bus was approaching. You and the boys stood there in silence, eyes wide and mouths parted open, wondering what the hell you just witnessed.

[Next Part]

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