#i had no idea how to animate her saying a simple phrase so i only did a small idle barely not really animation

[aihoshiino]

chapter 158 thoughts

i lied the hyperfixation took over and reanimated my body

Chapters Since The 143 Kiss Happened And Went Entirely Unacknowledged And Unaddressed Count: 15

Aqua Hoshigan Status: N/A

Usually when an OnK chapter ends on a bombshell like this one apparently does, I usually play a little coy as to my thoughts on it but I don't really see much point in doing that this time. This chapter basically is its final moment, with some swings taken at basically every other character on the way down so I don't see much point in separating it from the rest of the work. That said, my ultimate feelings on it will ultimately depend on how the story progresses past this moment so don't expect me to go too deeply into it for now. All I'll say at the top of the post is that I think this is deeply contrived and continues Akasaka's trend of seemingly beating every character with the dipshit stick in order to make a certain dramatic plot beat happen.

But it'll be pretty messy to follow if I get into the chapter's final scene right here and now, so let's rewind to the start and break down the rest of this chapter too. Don't worry, I have plenty of unpleasant things to say about it as well!!!!

Akane's here!! Actually in truth I had somehow forgotten that she'd cut her hair in the weeks since her last appearance so seeing her turn up with it so short kind of startled me for a second LOL

More AKKN yuribaiting… usually I eat up this kind of queerbait with a spoon because I am a simple creature but it doesn't really hit this time. I think it's because we're running through the Tokyo Blade arc in the anime right now and being reminded of how utterly electric their rivalry used to be makes the lack of meaningful follow-up and ultimate state of their relationship just kind of sad to me.

Seeing Akane and Ruby talking also feels kind of surreal given that it's almost 60 whole chapters since they've actually properly interacted onscreen… Like, obviously they were acting together in the Movie Arc and we can infer they had some offscreen chats then but… well, that's things we can infer, not something that's actually in the text of the story. Akane's involvement in the movie really was a total waste of potential, huh…

that said, wtf is akane even doing in miyazaki. girl who are you stalking this time.

Speaking of things that are weird, Ruby's hostile reaction to the idea of Akane getting a new boyfriend is… kind of bizarre, to the point where I literally have no idea where it's coming from?? Like, regardless of what this chapter tries to pretend, Ruby and Akane are absolutely not close enough for Ruby to feel upset at the prospect of Akane blowing her off in favour of boyfriend time. If anything, you'd think that having Aqua's ex-girlfriend definitively Out Of The Way would only be good on her eyes because it means one less obstacle between her and getting to shlonk her brother, but… apparently not???

The only way I can really make any sense of this is assuming this is the old and crusty "single girl getting jealous that her friend has a boyfriend at Christmas" joke, which I guess indirectly answers the question of whether or not anything AquRuby related has resolved in the Offscreen Dimension.

Anyway, Akane's chatter in this scene leads into something I've been kind of holding my tongue about in favour of waiting until it was addressed in the story and we're finally here - as previously predicted, this chapter starts on the note of attempting to assert that Ruby has 'become an idol who surpasses Ai' and you'll notice the way I phrased this because uh… no, she very much hasn't!

This idea of Ruby 'surpassing' Ai has been floating around in the story for a while now and as I've said before, unless OnK puts a huge amount of legwork into supporting that idea, I simply wouldn't believe it. It didn't, so I don't.

Not only is this assertion just half-heartedly plunked into the narrative - incredibly underwhelming for what should be a huge moment of triumph for Ruby - but the visual storytelling of the manga fails it as well. Like, compare this to similar moments from the very arc the anime is adapting this season - hell, in this very chapter, we see a panel of Kana's dazzling acting during Tokyo Blade. In comparison, the panels we see that supposedly show how Ruby has become an idol beyond compare… they just look like literally every other panel of any of the girls doing idol stuff. Hell, she looks distinctly less striking than some of Kana's performances as an idol and they certainly don't match or exceed the panels we've seen of Ai's spellbinding performances, which really undermines what the story is trying to say.

This is made even worse for the fact that the story has repeatedly pointed out that Ruby is the subject of incredible amounts of favoritism in the new B-Komachi - their boss is Literally Her Actual Mom who was explicitly called out by Ichigo for favoring work opportunities while leaving her fellow members out to dry. Members who, I feel the need to remind everyone, were scouted by her twin brother, not Ruby. Members whose careers as idols suffered during Ruby's clout chasing BH era because of her clout chasing and whose hurt feelings on this are framed as something Ruby is graciously forgiving about.

Like… I'm not saying it's impossible for Ruby to become an idol who outshines her mom, but this narrative as it's currently being presented in the manga falls flat for me because we never actually see Ruby face any kind of struggle on her road to doing this. Ai, Kana and Mem all face significant structural, social and industry-wide issues and toxicity that they must grapple with and overcome but Ruby just… does not?? Ever?? And given the way the narrative has framed Miyako's involvement in her career, the only conclusion I can draw is that Ruby is being shielded from all this by Miyako at the expense of the other girls. Especially because Ruby literally said so in 156!

Idk man. This whole chapter just sucks for basically every B-Komachi girl - that panel of the girls on stage where you literally can't even see Mem's face is so fucking miserable lmao. There was so much weight was placed on B-Komachi's togetherness as a trio of not just idols but friends who genuinely care for each other that seeing the story end up in this place of unironically indulging in all the same favoritism of Ruby and sidelining of her fellow members that Ichigo and Miyako did with the original B-Komachi is honestly just upsetting. Not only does it drag down Mem and Kana's stories, but it ends up making Ruby come off as a tremendously self-centered person in a way the narrative clearly does not understand and is uninterested in unpacking.

And like… bro, I don't want to be pissed off at Ruby!! Pre-BH Ruby is one of my favourite characters in the series!!! But the way she's been coddled by the narrative is deeply frustrating to read! It's frustrating to see everyone else's arcs compromised in favor of forcing this bizarre narrative about Ruby that doesn't even do any good for her either.

I can so easily see a better version of this story where Ruby surpasses Ai because she has so much support and faces none of the obstacles that Ai did, where the story is making a point of just how much further Ai could have gone and how much more she could've done if she hadn't been treated like such utter shit by everyone around her. But the point the story settles on seems to just be that Ruby is a better idol than Ai because she arbitrarily is not affected by societal and systemic oppression for no clearly articulated reason, I guess! You go, girl!

huffs. anyway.

Ruby's little monologue about the short-lived life of an idol also feels like the final nail in the coffin for the story being able to even pretend to do any meaningful industry commentary. Compared to how biting it was in the early arcs, it's a pretty standout representation with OnK's bizarre relationship with idol culture as of late, especially as pertains to Ruby's place in it. I can sort of get what I think Akasaka is going for here - it's part of the theme the story is leaning into lately of letting go of your past and moving towards a brighter future and this is how Ruby is coping with Kana's time in B-Komachi coming to an end. The point being made here is that change is inevitable no matter how you try to hold onto things and the only way to freeze yourself in stasis forever is to die.

But having this framed through the lens of Ruby talking so warmly about the impermanence of idols is just kind of… hello?? Ruby's framing here almost seems to treat the issue as some beautifully tragic but inevitable thing… and is very much is not! Idols age out of the industry because of its obsession with youth and beauty and the fetishization and commodification of virginial purity. Seeing Ruby frame it as this sad but natural thing when these fucked up purity standards literally killed her mom is just. What is going on here.

Speaking of baffling! Nino my girl, what are they doing to you…

I mentioned this in my chapter 155 thoughts that I felt extremely cold about the way the story was choosing to characterize Nino in the actual pages of the manga. I won't repeat myself too much but compared to the messed up but deeply human character we saw in 45510 and the RBKN conflict, this Nino honestly feels like a mean-spirited caricature, amped up to such dramatic extremes that she stops being a person and instead becomes a flat cartoon character used for moving the plot along. I loved Nino in 45510 and the Movie Arc so seeing her reduced to this psycho lesbian stereotype really stings.

also wtf is the manga trying to say with the 'since we killed ryosuke' bit. that was a whole ass suicide. this manga gives me such a headache sometimes.

Anyway. I can't talk around it anymore so. RIP Ruby, I guess. It was nice knowing you, but-

no but seriously, I'm holding my tongue on anything to do with this twist until next chapter because my actual thoughts will depend on how it plays out or if this is even really happening at all - which is NOT something i would even entertain as a possibility if oshi no ko was not the manga it currently is lol

But there's also the fact that, as others have pointed out, that panel of the stab is presented with faded colours and overly dramatic lighting in a way that is consistent with how OnK sometimes presents flashbacks or otherwise unreal visualizations. Given how incredibly dumb the entire cast - including Ruby - would have to be for this to actually, really happen, I'm withholding judgement until I see how this pans out.

That said. Man. I was really taken aback by how not just underwhelming but outright Not Good the actual panel of the stab is. The attempt to mine an emotional reaction out of the pre-existing iconic panel of Ai's murder just falls entirely flat because this version of it is worse in just about every regard. Ai's panel is composed beautifully, with the white petals and the motion of her body perfectly drawing the viewer's eye to the knife and the uncharacteristic expression of total shock on her face really hammers home the 'oh shit' moment. By contrast, Ruby's panel is flat with oceans of dead space despite being a much smaller panel and the actual stab has no weight to it, visually or otherwise. Ruby's body and face aren't reacting to it in the least - her expression is totally lifeless and she just looks like she's mid-stride, not that someone's just stabbed her in the gut. And to add insult to injury, the fucking layering on the killer's hand isn't even right. It's so obvious these two characters were drawn totally separately and pasted together afterwards and the entire moment falls flat as a result. Mengo, girl, what happened here!!!

and to add insult to injury. break next week. because why woudn't it be.

any of yall got ibuprofen

[redgearsmovin]

ohh i found some notes i wrote of really cute scenarios with the movers+nina. they are mostly made with my sona in mind but it's kinda general enough so if it inspires you in any way, feel free to take these ideas away lol.

under the cut because it is pretty long:

Smitty:

smitty shows you pictures of your favourite animal while he infodumps to you about it.

- or maybe you infodump while he listens intently. After a while you realise you've been rambling and get self-conscious that he probably had known those things, but he encourages you and tells you he wants to learn more so he can write it in his journal so you happily continue.

Rich

you and rich colouring! or you and rich painting. or making origami !!!

- his work turns out really nice while you think yours is a little wonky, but the way he cheers for it just as excitedly and points out little details he likes in your work makes you appreciate it more.

He rolls out a mahjong paper (not sure what this is known as) on the floor and you two doodle on it with crayons and such. this can also be a whole group activity tbh.

or sports! rich teaching you how to sports lol guiding you and being really patient till you get the hang of it.

Scott

Scott and you introducing each other's plushies and playing out scenarios with them, dressing up and such!

watching your favourite shows together, or making sock puppets !!

- Sometimes it's a little hard for you to be spontaneous when acting out which makes you feel like you're not a fun person to play with, but Scott knows just how to bounce off your ideas and make it really exciting. he makes you feel more comfortable to simply not worry too much when having fun.

Dave

you helping out dave with his invention? you and dave trying out weird pizza recipes? maybe dave teaching you how to make simple circuits and electronic things. Maybe all Dave needed to make working inventions was another person to audit and check his machine after he had finished them, to fill in the gaps and blind spots that he missed lol.

- you think you're not helping at all and only slowing him down with the mistakes you made, but Dave assures you've been a big help and tells you the things he wouldn't have noticed without you. He suggests dividing the task to something you're good at while he does the other work, and your both work together really well.

I think Dave would enjoy puzzles (unsure if he does in canon) so you and him trying to solve various of those either like puzzle boxes set or completing jigsaw puzzles. Or maybe trying out an escape room together (in the warehouse?).

Nina

NINAAAA. you and nina cooking. nina trimming your hair or fixing it up. you and nina trying on clothes and outfits.

nina taking pictures of you while you be an impromptu(?) model for her after she finishes doing your hair. maybe she had a short gig as a hairdresser(?) and wanted to include pictures of her work as samples.

going to the beach with nina, playing kite, Nina excitedly showing you videos of Boris and Oksana's ballet performances, going karaoke, making flower crowns,

Teaching each other phrases in your native language, or maybe even learn one another's language while practicing with them.

Try each other's favourite local cuisine. Styling one in the other's cultural outfits.

Sometimes you just feel like you take too much of Nina's time and wonder why she even chooses to hang out with you when she has so many cool friends. You never let her know this thought. one night when you and Nina were both stargazing, Nina says that moments like these are her favourite and she's glad to spend it with you. You admit the same and go on about how grateful you are for her. You don't think you deserve this blessing, but Nina stops you, telling you how she'd choose to do this all over again with you in a heartbeat. And aah I stop here this is getting so emotional lol

[irarosleneeee]

"I want to write"

     My life has always been heavily influenced by literature. I write whenever I'm happy. I write whenever I sense a wave of strong emotions rushing over me. I take a piece of paper and just start writing whenever I feel as though the world is ending and my melancholy will be the last emotion I experience before passing away. That way, I can somehow imagine that the pen would be the cure for my conflicted feelings and that it will take it away, making me feel much better than I did before. As they say, write all your issues away. It is that simple. Though it is difficult to pinpoint exactly the factor that draws us to literature, I'd like to presume that everyone's experience is unique. Just as I would never deem myself a math expert or even faintly, mildly "good" at math, which is fine, some individuals have a knack for reading whereas others may not.

    I've always admired writers for their ability to express their ideas in words. Their imaginative creativity has such a profound effect on those readers, like me, who view literature as their means of adventure. Their exquisite, creative use of words and phrases, the organic blending of complex terms, the pictures, and the processes of the mind, Alliteration and word sounds that are closely related to actions are used to set a mood: all of which are beautiful and it takes skill.  Some authors can even leave you feeling as though you are there in person while others may make your heart race with anxiety or anticipation. All of that results in stunning writing.

     Growing up as a child I loved reading and being read to.

     I was a curious kid. Many books were scattered, some are organized into its respective place in a shelf far from my reach. The thought of me having to call out my mom for her to get it for me still stays a funny memory on my mind up to this day. I'm glad to say that, at the age of 17, I am able to choose my own books. Extending my story, I have always loved the concept of fantasy novels and read about them frequently as a child. Up until this point, the idea of reading about princesses, enchantment, and happily ever after’s has been incredibly intriguing to me.  I vividly recall the moment I rummaged through my lola's bookshelves and discovered books with little to no content of tales of a prince and a princess; it turned out that a literature book had unexpectedly revealed itself to me. Nonetheless, I was still able to comprehend the bulk of it, and the only plot I could recall was the complexity of the words considering I was still a little child. On that day, I promised myself that I wouldn't let such unfamiliar words cause me to feel foolish in the future. I suppose I do dread the unfamiliar, but that's perfectly normal. It instead pushed me to explore more of literature.

I had this idea that I should compile all of my ideas into a book. So I did. But since I was just starting off, I instead posted some of my early writing on my writing account while I was in the eighth grade. Since I was interested in watching animations of all genres at the time, it was primarily made up of fan fictions featuring my favorite characters. I believe my writing abilities have increased during those times. I am also really grateful for the acquaintances I made and the constructive feedback they offered on my work in hopes of letting me develop and discover more about it. Nevertheless, as I got older and busier, it became harder for me to freely do what I want to do given how packed and hectic my schedule was. Instead of composing as I usually do, I've been reading stories that have caught my attention as an alternative for the lack of time. I quit writing because of writer's block as well, but occasionally, when I'm encouraged, I would compose narratives and poetry.

    I was happiest when I could express my thoughts in writing. But admittedly, as I grew older, life got in the way of my childhood fantasies. I gained lessons through disappointment and heartache. Tales lost their purpose, and the idea of a happily ever after appeared unattainable. Yet, I am the happiest when I am expressing myself in ways that I adore. In light of the incredible things writing can accomplish for my mind, literature has a special place in my heart. It allows me to experience sensations I've never felt before, acknowledge feelings I've repressed and realize I'm never alone.

Literature is where my heart and mind become one after all.

[emetoniche]

Alrighty, to tide ya’ll over until I get my life put together enough to finish my next fic, I have created pictures of all my characters’ pets. There are different versions of some of the pets, anime and realistic. The anime may not be super realistic, but I just loved them so much i had to add them in.

First off we’ve got Phantom, Roan’s Border Collie. He loves to run and play, but is fiercely loyal to Roan, and to an extent, Justin. His favorite game is chase, where he and Roan take turns chasing each other around the dog park, and his favorite toy is his squeaky sheep.

Next up are Justin’s cats. The reddish one is Flare and the sandy-grey one is Thistle. They get along pretty well with Phantom, playing with him on occasion and snuggling together almost every night. Flare tends to be a bit of a goofball, hiding in boxes, jumping out at people, making derpy faces. That sort of thing. Thistle is just straight up lazy. He doesn’t move unless forced or unless there is food involved. His idea of a perfect day is lying on either Roan or Justin’s lap all day being petted.

Callum owns two macaws, one rainbow and one blue-and-gold. The rainbow macaw’s name is Kira. She’s LOUD. She has thousands of different sounds memorized, which she likes to screech at Callum every time he walks by. She actually knows the meaning of a lot of them, such as “time to eat” and “shut the fuck up,” the latter of which she likes to yell at her adopted brother, Flynn. Flynn prefers physical gestures to screaming things, though whenever he does start yelling the phrases he knows, Kira tells him to be quiet. She’s something of a diva, wants to be the only one talking and such. Flynn knows how to use his feet to make many different gestures, each with their own meaning. He can ask for food, water, cuddles, flight time, and tv time. There are other things too, but they are more of exclamations than requests.

Darius’s pet fox, Adler, is a silver fox who has a ver playful attitude. He loves to play with Phantom whenever Roan and Justin bring him over, wrestle being a favorite, and hide-and-seek. Adler spends most of his time either chewing on his toys or riding around on Darius’s shoulders. He loves to be up high where he can see everything that is going on.

Eddie is pretty simple: he just has a bowl of goldfish. The small orange one is Phinny, short for Phineas, the large orange one is Kevin, and the yellow one is Tidal. Not much else to say about them. They are just fish after all.

Finally, Ariadne’s cats are Sam and Dean. The white one is Dean and the black one is Sam. They are littermates, and they are named after the brothers in Ari’s favorite television show, Supernatural. They are Maine Coons. Sam is much more active than Dean, liking to go out to hunt birds and mice in the neighborhood. Dean on the other hand is a bit of a homebody, preferring to stay in the house where he can steal stuff off of the counters.

[noodlecontuco]

old friend - mitski

I still think of you whenever I read a poem about friendships that fall apart. About people walking out of your life. About old friends. But I don't think of you in a conventional way, no. Your face doesn't appear in my mind, and neither does your name. I can't even remember the last time I said your name.

It's just you.

You have become a concept in my life. "Her". And whenever I try to explain it to someone else, I can't find the words. How to unpack the weight of my love for you, in an hour long therapy session? How to compress how much we hurt each other, while pulling an all nighter with friends? No, not even if I had all the time in the world I could explain it to them. They would ask "why didn't you just leave?"

Oh, my dear, If only I could've.

How do you let something that is so ingrained in you go? How do you leave such a great part of your life behind without leaving a part of you behind too? I remember what I was drawing the second time I stayed the night in your house. I remember your favorite food and all the sweets you didn't liked. I remember your father's last name, and I also remember that you don't like to use it. I think of you whenever I pose for a picture with a certain expression that you used to make. I remember how many stuffed animals used to sit on top of your bed. Everytime someone uses your favorite song on an Instagram story, you pop up on my head, like an annoying ad in a pirate website. I know I remember too much, but tell me, where do I put it down?

Everytime our we come across in a WhatsApp group, everytime we hang out in a bigger group and we say the same phrase at the same time like we could read each other's mind, everytime you send me a funny video about a niche that we both share, I feel like a tiny part of me goes back to the good times. The naive part of my mind sparks this miniscule thought that says "Maybe we can go back to that. I have learned about boundaries, so I wouldn't let it go too far. Not this time". But the logic part of me crushes that idea before the spark turns into a flame. It's not that simple. I can't let you walk all over me again. And I know that it's likeable that it happens, if we ever become friends again. I have to remind myself that you're just being nice because we're not friends anymore. That the second we go back to normal, you'll forget about me again. And I can't go through that again, I'm sorry.

I'm scared of seeing you again. I'm scared to spend one-on-one time with you again.

I fear that, if I dare to do it, that tiny spark will become a forest fire without my consent. And by the time you put out a forest fire... It'll have done enough damage anyways.

Because you can't control fire.

And I can't control you.

----------------------------------------------------------

17/05/23

[sundarika]

headcanon in two parts, sorry. Ask does not miss it. 1.1 Oh, you know the insecticons from the tfp? Can I have a headcanon where a S/O person is on friendly terms with insecticons?

[TF PRIME] S/O Is Friends With The Insecticons

———————————————————————

* [S/O] meets them by accident quite a bit before the events of the Energon Eaters. Arachnid is still “leader” of the Insecticons by technicality as the only available ‘Queen’ for the hive-mind, however she never really patrols the area or takes care of the hive as she should, rather choosing to wander as a free mind, disobeying orders from everybody.

* You had stumbled upon the hive while taking a short walk along the side of the Jasper highway, leading out of town and to an old coal mine you liked to inhabit on your days off work. A home-away-from-home of sorts, it brought you peace of mind to have a quiet place.

* At least you thought it was a quiet, desolate area until you broke through a thinning in the rock floor of the entry shaft and ended up crashing an Insecticon tea-party.

*It was a rather awkward fall, and it had injured your hip joint on the way down, leaving you temporarily paralyzed in throbbing pains and nerve damage.

* The giant bug-like robots and their shiny, metal wingspans immediately armed themselves and aimed at the shifting dust and rockfall, growling and chittering in a language of some sort, unknown to you.

* “Is it one of those ugly-faced Decepticons ploys again?”

* “It’s too small and squishy, much sooner to be a predacons’ chew toy than any weapon.”

* You looked super confused, absolutely stupefied, completely duped, utterly incomprehensible, awkwardly awed, amazingly idiotic, a-

* Their manner of speech and vocal patterns was practically lost on you. You could pick up remnants of a language similar to broken [language], but really nothing else. In an attempt to make contact with the metallic giants to gain help, you enabled your parroting capabilities.

* Humans have the stunning ability to mimic sounds and specific noise frequencies, at levels other earthen animals, especially mammals, cannot. Using this ability, you managed to copycat the grinding and chattering noises coming from the vocal mass of bug-bots.

* [S/O]: “¿Krrt-grrut vvurrr chechch?”

* Hardshell: “¿Buzzzz vert-tet-brrrz, Erreech?”

* [S/O]: “¿Erreech?”

* Hardshell: “¡VRREE BUZZZ-EECH CLICKLICKIK!”

* The contact went well, unbeknownst to you, and the successful communication meant that you might actually have a chance at escape, or finding a hospital!

* Congrats! You are now [Tiny Bug Child]! You have no idea what they were speaking about, unaware that they were contemplating how to execute you, but you successfully managed to evade death by being cute and cuddly! People say curiosity killed the cat, but it evidently saves the naive human-who-fell-into-an-insect-cult-meeting!

* Hardshell, the Insecticon you nearly landed on top of, begins to lift you out of the rubble, and place you down upon a makeshift stone table, partially destroyed by the collapse. The others—including Wingflap, Bombshell, Shrapnel, Blockhead, and Kickback—gather closely around you, cooing and chirping in their weird language again.

* This was, evidently, how you became the new Queen of the hive, though you didn’t know it, and managed to befriend your way through the entire enclosed community and worm into the spark of every Insecticon, though they were very few in number.

* You made easy friends with Bombshell, and remained close with him up until his untimely death by Bulkheads hammer fist. He would often lay atop the Jasper cliffside with you, and make out shapes in the clouds, constellations in the stars—regaling to you tales of the Old Cybertron, when his own kind weren’t so despised, and were respected as viable assets and allies amongst those with forms like and unlike their own—until the Autobot Elitists ensured they were seen as ugly and malformed, made to hide away in the shadows and step away from society for ‘the greater good’.

* It’s how you came to hate the Autobots—and Decepticons—for all they had done, to their planet and yours, and to your friends as well.

* Your mimicry slowly turned into actual speech patterns and recognition. Repetitive sound signals were a key portion of Archaic Insecticon speech, which made it easy to recognize simple words or phrases, each indicated by a set of whirs, clicks, or beeps.

* Now that you could actively communicate with most of the hive, it was far easier to make friends with even the hardiest of bots.

* Hardshell, of course, was tough to crack. At your constant insistance, he spoke with you once or twice, and made sure to acknowledge your presence when in the room, as well as save you a seat at the underground pub every other weekend. It wasn’t actually a pub per-say, rather a dugout chamber with smooth walls and some stone slabs insert for seating, where the cons enjoyed engex they could sneak off the Nemesis from time-to-time.

* After awhile, he warms up to you, welcoming you back to the hive every day after work, standing alongside his multiple siblings, and pushing others aside to get to hold you first.

* Meanwhile this all happens, they still don’t know what a human is. Their simple understanding of earth comes only from what they’ve seen on the highway from the cliffside, or from video footage of the Autobot pests on the Nemesis. Due to their bulky size and noisiness, they’re banned from most human-inhabited areas.

* Don’t doubt that some of them have attempted to follow their [S/O] home. They have. And some of them won’t stop trying. It’s been more than one awkward encounter between you and some teens to get them to realize they could get you in trouble.

* You all eat [dessert] together sometimes, made with energon supplements for ‘The Boys™️’, with some good ol’ 25-something-kg of sugar mixed in.

* The boys were worried when you didn’t show up for a week due to hospitalization via severe food poisoning medical coma.

* When Arachnid finally returned to Earth, and her fight against Arcee had proceeded about as well as expected, she located the hive and proceeded to force them to engage in business with Megatron. She believed that by implementing her own soldiers amongst the ranks, she’d be better equipped to backstab Megatron when the time came.

* She was undoubtably surprised when Hardshell and some others adamantly refused to take part in her plans at first, until she enforced their compliance through the hive-mind.

*When she learned of your existence, and the very gauge of your importance to her former hive, she came at you with full force.

*The Insecticons were fully unprepared to deal with a fight between their small [S/O] and an extremely angry ex-Queen. In refute, they returned you to the surface without so much as a goodbye, and begged you to escape before Arachnid scented you out.

* It was soon after these events that you learned of Breakdown’s death, Bulkhead’s coma, and Bombshell’s demise due to the combined effects of a substance called Tox-En and injuries sustained during his battle with Bulkhead. It broke you inside to learn there was nothing you could have done to help, but you refused to disobey their pleas to stay away for awhile.

* At the hive, Arachnid rules supreme. Being able to control the hive-mind was a feat a human was incapable of achieving, only Cybertronians able to easily access the imbedded chain of command.

* Hardshell mourned the loss of a true friend—a small, squishy human—but a friend nonetheless.

* Wingflap and Kickback went through a collection of memories you’d left behind with them. Pictures and small objects gifted over the years, a small treasure trove of important parts of their lives, now without you in them.

* Shrapnel stims a lot more now, and has nervous tics that he believes are the result of the loss of his dear friend. He knows you aren’t dead, least not yet, but he knows that you’ll likely never come back.

* Blockhead, as dumb as everybody thinks he is, is actually very emotionally intelligent. He has a way with words he barely understands, and [S/O] acted as a big support for someone like him. Without them now, he can no longer function like normal, and now has nobody left to talk to.

* Arachnid could care less. She absolutely despises [S/O], and would smite them for all she cares. You matter little to her, and only worry her for the loyalty and capacity of her troops.

* It isn’t until the Energon Eaters appear that everything turns completely south.

* [S/O] finally builds up enough courage to march themselves back down to the mine, and demand to meet Arachnid face-to-faceplate.

* The desert is hot, Nevada is hotter, and the trek down the highway seems endless and tedious. You pass by 5 interstate signs on your way to the hive, and count the steps it takes to reach the entrance, parched by the time you make it there.

* In all your sweaty glory, you, [S/O], make your way down the carved pathway into the mineshaft, dark and cramped—just as you left it.

* But everything is exactly as it was left, not an item out of place. The entire hive was empty, including of those you cared about. Their rooms are full of memories, and their energon cubes still lie in a corner, collecting dust and grime.

* The search seems profitable, yet it leaves you with nothing, and the emptiness of the hive echoes around you, and in all the chambers, through the cavern walls of every room.

* You know they’re gone, that they have left without you, and without so much as a simple passing note.

* Perhaps someday you’d find them, hiding away in another Jasper mine, but you never would.

* In their haze of a hive mind, they barely even remember the face of the human they left behind. A long line across the moon—stretching on for miles—and a vampire on a false throne, draining the lifeblood from their veins, and the image of [S/O] from their minds.

———————————————————————

✨ Hope you enjoyed ✨

[more-than-a-princess]

Sonia, for as much as she tried to experience what was a normal life, was often called naïve. The sheer belief that chores and errands were something fun, something to marvel at, and that the opinion of the efficiency of trains and convenience stores making it easier for people without a household staff to go about their day-to-day lives was not only naïve but fucking stupid. That said, as she stepped onto the escalators heading for the top floor, she stared at Kanata, taking every bit of personal composure she had not to do the same thing to him. Was he simply naïve, or did he really have no idea how politics worked? Not that most teenagers had an intimate look into politics: you either had to be born into it, inheriting it, or have enough money to invest in making a difference. Kanata, Sonia thought, didn't fall into any of the above categories: still, was there nothing to be said for a simple act of negotiation?

"Kanata-san, when you meet fans through handshake greets or otherwise," Sonia asked quietly. She needed to phrase it in a way she hoped he would understand, drawing on what she knew of the idol world from her friend Sayaka Maizono's stories. It wasn't the sort of thing she ever spoke of with Eichi: they commiserated in the demands of their respective families over meals and experiences said families would never be caught dead engaging in. "Are you close friends with each and every one of those people? Or do some of them simply want your signature, or a photo, or a handshake, without divulging your most personal thoughts and opinions to them? They want to say they've met you, but it's not really an opportunity to come to know you."

She turned the corner, heading to the next bank of escalators. Thankfully, most visitors were far more preoccupied with the various tanks and pools to care about their conversation. It wasn't the sort of commentary she wanted on record, but Kanata was a friend. She didn't want to leave him in the dark like a child, hidden away from the real conversation and reality of life. "That's what it's like for me, many of my appearances and interviews. It's not really a friendship, it is a business relationship, a negotiation." One that, if she said the wrong word, or held her hands or handbag the wrong way, or didn't smile with just the right amount of luster, she would be analyzed and scrutinized in the press until a more interesting scandal came along.

Still, it wasn't necessarily insincere: it was simply the job. One she was born into and needed to inherit one day. Sonia smiled, both at the otters and Kanata, who seemed just as entertained by their brown eyes and sweet expressions as they swam playfully in their enclosure. "Oh, so you will inherit an aquarium one day then!" She clarified. So they did have something in common: they were both the next generation of a legacy. "Truth be told, my family isn't fond of me bringing anyone to visit at home unless they're thoroughly vetted and have my parents' approval. Simply attempting to have my entire class flown to Novoselic for my 18th birthday has been an ordeal enough, though my mother won't rest until I've invited Byakuya Togami and he accepts." There was a better chance of hell freezing over than Sonia and Byakuya hitting it off without any hitch whatsoever, but she chose not to mention that.

"But I know what it's like to have a strict family who doesn't approve of things, including a normal education and seeing much of the world on your own," She assured him, tracing a fingertip against the plexiglass of the tank. She'd captured one of the otters' attention, the animal now swimming against the other side of the glass to try and catch her finger. "I didn't attend a regular school until middle school, and I could only have friends over from the 'right, aristocratic families,' as my mother puts it." Being trotted out for various political and influential visitors, that too was something Sonia understood, before she needed to be seen and not heard. Mostly, she simply didn't want Kanata to think he was alone in an odd upbringing. No, he had a friend who thought his entire tale was, perhaps disturbingly, normal.

"Do you want to visit the penguins, and maybe tell me about your friend Madara-san?" She smiled, looking towards an eager group of penguins about to be fed their afternoon meal. "He must be very important if he helped you chart your own course in life! I am very intrigued, and perhaps a bit envious of such a thing."

“I wonder how often you are surrounded by… friends… when you do your meet-and-greets… Because I have… Looked into some of your public appearances a little, because I was curious. It seemed so very… Um…” Kanata waved his hand about vaguely, not finding the words for what he wanted to convey, which was that her public speeches and audiences seemed more isolated. The one he had watched had been a video taped in Novoselic, he guessed, perhaps at the castle. It had been a short news clip so the quality had been good, nothing amateurish about it, but things still seemed… Distant. Somehow. “Ah… I… Am sorry. I do not know how to say this,” he finally admitted with slumping shoulders. Alas, speaking was still hard for him from time to time, there were still words and turns of phrases that he was unfamiliar with.

Following Sonia’s lead happily, Kanata made sure to stay as close to her as possible, given his somewhat slow and unsteady gait. It was like he had a constant case of sea legs whenever he was in a situation where he didn’t feel one hundred percent comfortable. As soon as they were inside the aquarium proper, he knew he’d pick himself up unconsciously. It always seemed to happen that way. “If you were to ever stop learning… I think you would stop… Um… Growing. Not your body, but your mind. I think as long as you learn, as long as you are… Yes. A student… Then I think that you are alive. If you do not… Learn… Can you even say that you live? I wonder…”

The inside of the building was cool and comforting, the blue light coming from the tanks familiar and beautiful. There was a certain serenity that settled across Kanata’s features that hadn’t been there before and it seemed that he got lost in his own thoughts for a moment, staring at one of the tanks. That was, until Sonia’s startled questions reached him and he turned his attention toward her. He stepped onto the escalator, hand gripping the railing tightly. “Well… I… Yes, we own… the Aoumi Aquarium. It is not very big and we’re trying to… Well. Stay afloat.” He smiled briefly at the unintentional pun. “I feel very much at home there, with my little sea friends… And I like working with them very much. They are innocent and beautiful and they always listen. But…” He pried his hand away from the escalator railing once they reached the second floor and willed himself to relax. “I am not sure my family would allow me to take a girl friend to visit. And I did not… I did not wish to provoke them. Also, I wanted to come here, because I have never been here before…”

Arriving at the third floor elicited an excited little squeal from Kanata and he trotted on over to the otter pen, waving cheerfully at the squash-faced little critters. His smile thinned out at Sonia’s question though and he slowly straightened himself up, tucking tropical blue strands of hair behind his ear as he turned to face her.

“I suppose… I have never been in school. Not before High School. It is kind of silly, but my family is very… Old fashioned? Or… Should I perhaps say… Odd…?” He seemed to stumble over his words, trying to find the right ones. He wanted to tell her more about himself, it was only fair after all, but at the same time… He vaguely understood that some things were a bit strange to talk about and you never knew how people would react to certain circumstances in his past. “I mostly… Well, I mostly lived in this one room. I had a couple of playmates so I was not… Alone? All the time? And the grown-ups would come and have me bless them or beg me for things, so it was alright, really.”

“One of my playmates… Madara… He made me really… No. He inspired me. To become an idol. So I… Wanted out. And I came to Yumenosaki Academy.” Kanata smiled quickly, trying to make light of the conversation. “And then I met you~!”

[nat-20s]

Wonderful! Au Part 7! (also on ao3 here) another episode only installment, and obnoxiously fluffy! Have fun!

~*~

Martin, tired: Hello everybody! Welcome, or welcome back, to a very low energy episode. We have had, as the kids say, A Week Tm.

Jon, equally tired, but fond: Is that as the kids say?

Martin: I don't know, and perhaps worse, I don't really care. I guess I could ask Jeremiah next time he's over, but I'm not sure if that would actually help.

Jon: Shockingly, I don't think two year olds have their finger on the beating pulse of youth culture.

Martin: Hmm, maybe not. Speaking of Jeremiah, he's part of why the format of this episode is gonna be a bit different than our regular. On top of me dealing with a frankly obscene amount of inventory management, and Jon being swamped with grant writing-

Jon: I never want to look at proposal guidelines again-

Martin: we were on babysitting duty for our favourite neighborhood hellion-

Jon: Hey, Jeremiah is a very sweet kid! I know he's a toddler, but we shouldn't be slandering him anyway.

Martin: One, we're not even using his real name, I don't think that counts as slander, and two, exactly, he's a toddler, he's by default a hellion.

Jon, teasing: This coming from the person that actually wants one?

Martin: I..look, if anything, the last few days have shown we should not be permanent parents.

Jon: But?

Martin:...There's no but.

Jon: I don't believe you! Are you lying for my benefit or the audience's? Because someone spent the last five days wearing one of the largest grins I've ever seen, exhausted as it may have been.

Martin: Okay! Fine, I admit, I liked having a kid around. I still think it would be a bad idea to do it full time, but I dunno. I wish we weren't both only children or something. We would make such good uncles.

Jon: Should I should have taken that teaching job after all?

Martin: Perhaps. After all,

Martin, singsong: An English teacher, is really someone!

Jon and Martin, singing together: If only you, had be-come one!

Jon: Honestly, though, I was considerably underqualified. I'm much more suited to my current job, even if it doesn't have quite the same impact on the "shaping of the next generation" or whatnot.

Martin: Wait, you actually care about qualifications now? When did that change?

Jon: This coming from Mister "master's degree in parapsychology"? And it was probably around the time that the world ended from taking on a workload I was ill-suited for.

Jon:...

Jon: Metaphorically speaking, of course.

Martin: Oh, of course. Definitely nothing literally apocalyptic in our pasts, no siree, nothing to see or speculate about or make weirdly involved forums for here. Uh, anyway, long introduction not so short: Both of us have been averaging about 4 hours of sleep, so any sort of actual research was not on the table.

Jon: If any of you are wondering why we didn't just say that we're both very much worn out and thus we'll be taking a week off, it's because we're both deeply, deeply stubborn.

Martin: It's one of our best shared qualities that has never caused any conflict between us, ever.

Jon: In fairness, sheer stubbornness does account for, what, 75% of the reason that either of us are still alive? And it hasn't caused a major conflict between us in a good three years.

Martin: That's true. We've become a deeply boring, relatively conflict free couple. Which fucking rules, by the way. To all the couples out there: I highly recommend being boring. It is so nice. We've gotten to go to the farmer's market so many times.

Jon: You do love the farmer's market. I would say that it's the access to fresh produce, but I think you just like the attention that one yarn seller gives you. Can't believe you would take advantage of a crush to get discounts on wool. How did I marry such an opportunist?

Martin: Ollie does not have a crush on me. They're just friendly to everyone.

Jon: Bullshit. I certainly never get an extra skein or stitch markers or delicate fabric cleaner tossed in my bag. Actually, I think I've been charged more for committing the crime of having married you before they could.

Martin: I'm..70% sure that's not true, but every sentence we speak, we stray further from even pretending to be on topic. So, to everybody listening, this is the itty bitty episode! Basically, we're only doing small wonders and user submissions. If you want details or backstory for things we like, too bad, come back next week. Jon, I believe you're first this week?

Jon: Oh, right. My first small wonder is cat names.

Martin: Delightful, but unsurprising. Though, I would've expected either more or less specificity. Why cat names as opposed to pet's names in general, or, like, military title names?

Jon: Well that's simple enough. I've simply never met a misnamed cat, even if the name itself wasn't to my personal tastes, and I think that speaks to the wonderful universality of cats.

Martin: This, of course, implies that you have met animals that were misnamed.

Jon: Oh, I have. I once met a papillion dog named Meatball.

Martin: Now I know you don't like food names in general for pets, but are you sure that Meatball didn't suit the dogs personality? I've known some "Meatballs" in my lifetime.

Jon, only half-mock offended: Of course it didn't fit, Martin. She was a lady. A nervous, jittery lady, but a lady nonetheless.

Martin, laughing: And what, you've never met a dignified cat with an undignified name, or vice versa? Would you be okay with our cat being named Meatball?

Jon: I would be upset if our cat was named Meatball, because we named her and we're above that sort of thing, but, technically speaking, she could have been Meatball in another lifetime and it wouldn't have been wrong. You see, all cats are a mix of both extremely austere and little baby idiot.

Martin: Oh, is that the scientific terminology?

Jon: It is. Now, while there's probably some amount of, er, normative determinism or confirmation bias or something that results in a cat with a more dignified name seeming to possess more of that austerity, as all cats have both, any name can, potentially, fit. Hence why it's wonderful.

Martin: I..accept your proposal for now, but I think more research needs to be done. Maybe we should visit the shelter this weekend and test your hypothesis.

Jon: Hmm. I think we may need to visit multiple shelters, actually. A large sample size is necessary for any sort of veracity, obviously.

Martin, imitating Jon tone: Obviously.

Jon: Glad you agree. What's your first small wonder?

Martin: Tofu!

Jon: I..didn't realize you liked that much?

Martin: Well, I don't get it very often since I know you can't stand the texture, even though it is not like 'worse scrambled eggs', and you're a horrible food thief-

Jon: Lies and slander. We readily share. If I'm a horrible food thief, you have committed the exact same, if not worse, crime as myself.

Martin: Well, we are thick as thieves.

Jon, groaning: You're thick as something alright

Martin: Rude! My beloved husband-

Jon: -uh huh-

Martin: whom I love and trust with my most tender of hearts-

Jon: -an oddly cannibalistic turn of phrase-

Martin, badly suppressing laughter: Oh, my god. I want a divorce, then I can put tofu in as many dishes as I like. I'll triple my protein intake.

Jon: It'd never go through. I'll burn the papers. No, wait, I'll burn down the legal offices where the papers are kept.

Martin: Hmm. While my experiences with it have been, uh, varied to say the least, I do have to admit that arson is one of the more attractive crimes of passion. I suppose I'll take you back.

Jon, flat: I'm so very grateful.

Jon, genuine: You do have yet to actually tell me why you think tofu is wonderful, love.

Martin: It's just a good food! It's neutral enough that you can toss it in pretty much anything with a sauce, you can bake it, you can fry it, whatever. Plus it's what? two? Three quid? I spent many years of my life living off the cheapest, saltiest approximation of noodles you could imagine, and half a pack of tofu, a little bit of sesame oil, and some green onions went a long way to both making it more filling and less sad. 

Martin: Plus, I feel like it often gets decried for being something it's not? It's so often viewed as a meat substitute or the vegan alternative option, and so when people try it, they often go in with a false preconceived notion of what it's going to be like, and then end up disappointed. They're all like, 'ugh, this doesn't taste like turkey!' and yeah, of course it doesn't. It's the oatmeal raisin cookie of the protein world, a perfectly good and tasty treat on its own, but if you want chocolate chip, it's not gonna work.

Jon: Martin you don't even like oatmeal raisin. I'm the only one that ever eats them out of the multipacks.

Martin: Well, yeah, but I don't like oatmeal raisin because of its flavor, not because I think it should be chocolate chip and fails. It illustrates my point. Also, just for balance, is your next small wonder oatmeal raisin cookies?

Jon: No, though, maybe one of these weeks. They are good. But no, um, my next small wonder is being married.

Martin, let out a high bark of a laugh: Being married is a small wonder?!

Jon: Small wonders doesn't mean a lack of importance! Or even significance in our lives. Half the time we even end up spending just as much time chattering on about them as the things we actually research. But, yes, I didn't feel like researching the concept of being married. For one, a lot of the history of it is depressing and patriarchal, and for two, it's not something I really feel any need to elaborate on. Being married. I very much enjoy it. I recommend it for anybody that's found someone that they want to marry, and who wants to marry them. I really recommend being married to Martin Blackwood, I think I would enjoy it significantly less if it was to anybody else, but one: we typically try to make the wonderful things in this show  applicable to more than just ourselves, and two: I got there first, so I believe the appropriate thing to say here would be; neener neener and/or everyone else can go suck it, Ollie.

Martin: Well...

Jon: Well, what?

Martin: Saying you got there first is technically not true-

Jon: What?!

Martin, laughing like a bastard: Sorry, sorry! Couldn't resist! Jon, you already know that you're my first real realationship, how would be married before fit that?

Jon: Hence my surprise at the notion! I cannot believe you! I give you my trust, my earnestness, and belief-

Martin [only laughs harder]

Jon: and you throw it in my face for a bit. I take back everything, being married is a nightmare, because sometimes your partner thinks he a fucking comedian and you just have to put up with him because you love him and want to live the rest of your life with him or some such nonsense. Not worth it, if you ask me. My turn to ask for the divorce.

Martin: Babe, hate to break it to you, but both of us are guilty of doing bits that the other doesn't like, it's an integral part of  a healthy marriage, and secondly, you knew who I was long before I proposed. You should've said no when you had the chance.

Jon: Hang on, you proposed?

Martin: Yeah? This isn't part of a bit, of course I proposed. I'm even pretty sure you were there. The whole visit back to Scotland trip? I finally made you a sweater and said it was because we would now be immune to the boyfriend curse?

Jon: No, no, I remember all that, but it wasn't the proposal. It was a reaffirmation of the proposal. We had already decided to get married.

Martin: Well, yeah,, I wasn't just gonna spring that on you, we had had conversations beforehand-

Jon:  No, I mean, I had already proposed. I asked you to marry me a good three years earlier, and you said yes, which is a proposal by any definition that I know.

Martin: Jon, love, darling, apple of my eye, fire of my soul, I mean this in the nicest way possible, what the everloving fuck are you talking about?

Jon: In the ambulance ride when we, uh, moved here. It was the thing I said to you the second I saw your eyes were open.

[An audible pause is left in the recording.]

Martin: That does not count.

Jon: How does it not count?! I asked you to marry me, you very emphatically said yes, that's the de facto definition of an accepted marriage proposal!

Martin: It doesn't count because you were half-delirious with blood-loss, and I had a traumatic brain injury that the hospital was very surprised I made a full recovery from. No court in the world would consider anything we said then more than pain driven ramblings, let alone, I dunno, contractually binding.

Jon: Well, I knew what I was saying well and clear. Just because it was desperate doesn't mean it wasn't sincere. I didn't realize that you weren't as cognizant when you accepted.

Martin, snorting: Yeah, didn't really need to be cognizant to say yes. I've wanted to marry you since the train ride to Scotland.

Jon: Wait, really? Martin, we hadn't even been on a date.

Martin: And yet we were on the lamb together, which I honestly think is more romantic than sitting in some restaurant somewhere trying to get through icebreakers. Also, back up, from your perspective we've been engaged since 2019? What did you think we were doing in the interim?

Jon: Uhh..

Martin: Yes?

Jon: There are people that have long engagement periods, and it's not exactly like we were in any sort of position to get married for awhile. Especially not that first year.

Martin: Okay? And?

Jon: And..I sort of thought you had changed your mind. For awhile. Was rather surprised that you kept living with me, considering that, on the worst nights, I was convinced you were going to storm off and leave me forever any minute now. Hence why your proposal was rather relieving.

Martin: Oh, Jon, love. That is so very ridiculous, and so very you, and so very close to many of my own fears and doubts. Do you have any idea how terrified I was to float the idea of marriage to you? Half the time I was convinced I was just meant to keep you company until you found someone better. And, Christ, we'd, from your perspective, been engaged the whole damn time. Fuck.

[Jon, after a beat, starts laughing. It has a slightly hysterical edge to it. Martin joins in. It takes a minute for the laughter to subside enough for them to speak again.]

Jon: I'm rapidly realizing that our entire romantic relationship would've been, if not more successful, a hell of a lot faster if we weren't both complete fools.

Martin: You're realizing that now? I think I've known that since the CV incident. I've definitely known it since the Lonely.

Jon, with a slightly tired chuckle:Yes, yes, something probably should've tipped me off earlier. Shockingly, observation of our own personal romantic trends is not always a strong suit of mine.

Jon: Anyway, please tell me you have another small wonder, this has gotten wildly of track.

Martin: Since we're talking about marriage anyway, I think my next small wonder is having a shared reference in your wedding vows. Our friends had "I have been, and always shall be, your friend" in theirs, and I made Jon cry with a slightly altered Lord of the Rings quote in ours.

Jon: First off, we were both openly weeping long before that point, secondly, I defy anybody to have been through half of what we have and then have the love of their life look them in the eyes and tell them "Leave you? I never intend to. I am going with you, if you climb to the moon" without at least tearing up.

Martin: There wasn't a dry eye in the audience, either. Granted, the audience was only 20 people, but that was also literally the only time I've seen Eloise show a strong emotion, so I'm pretty smug about it.

Martin, soft: I still feel exactly the same, you know. If you're climbing to the moon, I'll make sure the rope is strong enough for two.

Jon, soft: I know, love.

Jon: Though, to be fair, the moon is also significantly more pleasant than many places we've been.

Martin: God, I hate how much that's true. Look at this barren, oxygenless rock, at least it's not actively trying to kill us. Practically a honeymoon location.

[Martin sighs]

Martin: I am so tired. Let's do the user submissions then take a very long nap.

Jon: Please.

Martin: So, first submission is from Josie; They find it wonderful getting cards from their friends. They say they're lucky to have so much love in their life and have friends that care enough to send them things. That is wonderful Josie! We have a drawer in our house dedicated to every loving card we've ever received since the move, and they're always such a nice reminder of the people in our lives.

Jon: We should really organize that drawer, but, yes, agree with the sentiment. Even the cards from people that are no longer in our lives are lovely, I think. Those connections are very much meaningful for both of us, whether they're active or not.

Martin: That's very true.  Next submission is from Lys, who submits the sound of leaves crunching under your feet in the fall. Ah, that's a classic.

Jon: I just felt myself relax imagining it. I wish it was autumn.

Martin: Don't we all? Alright, for the last submissions, I'm grouping them together as they follow a similar theme. Jadwiga submits the feeling of waking up well into the morning with the sun shining through the window and your cat laying next to you, and Oran submits when a dog falls asleep with its head in your lap.

Jon: I can heartily recommend at least one of those, considering that's how we try to wake up most mornings. The Duchess is a dutiful darling girl who spends every night with us, and she's usually still there when us humans rise.

Martin: I bet you'll agree with the other when I finally convince you to get me a dog for my birthday.

Jon: It hasn't happened yet, so I wouldn't hold your breath.

Martin: But you don't even dislike dogs! You're just as happy to pet them when they pass by as I am.

Jon: Being fine with an animal isn't the same thing as wanting to adopt one for yourself! We don't even know if The Duchess would put up with a dog.

Martin: I bet she would. I bet we could get a big senior dog who's the calmest animal you've ever met with those soft eyes and a little grey on the muzzle and she would cuddle up in an instant. And we did say we should visit a shelter or three this weekend..

Jon: I think you're rather callously taking advantage of my exhausted state, but I suppose we can look. 

Martin: Hell fuckin yeah. So, I think that'll close out the episode, and as we always say at the end, uh, go take a nap and get a dog. Not necessarily in that order.

[the-bau-quinjet]

A Song For You

Steve Rogers x Singer!Reader

Summary: Snippets of Steve and Reader's life together as she sings a song she wrote for him.

Warnings: mention of car accident, parents dying, mostly just fluff though

Word Count: 6413

a/n: this is a mess, but I'm happy with it. It's basically a series of blurbs that are not in chronological order so I could follow the song. It's inspired by Like My Father by Jax. :) Sorry if it's confusing, hopefully it all makes sense at the end

Masterlist

Steve had been gone for months on a mission. It wasn’t often his missions lasted that long, so of course one of the few times it happened Y/N needed to tell him something important.

She shook off the annoyance as she got ready for Tony’s gala. He wanted to celebrate the successful mission as soon as Steve and Bucky came home. Of course, everyone tried to reason with him that waiting would be better so that the two super soldiers wouldn’t be exhausted, but Tony refused to listen to logic.

“Nonsense. We’re having the party as soon as they arrive.” He stated matter-of-factly before turning to Y/N. “And you, my dear, are going to sing.”

“Tony, maybe you could at least pretend to phrase it as a question?” Pepper scolded, eyeing the woman in question apologetically.

“Sorry. Will you sing at my party?” He grinned, knowing Y/N would say yes since Tony probably already told everyone she would be performing.

“Tony, you’re a menace.” She eyed him before nodding.

“I am, and you’re wonderful!” He exclaimed. “I happen to know you’ve been working on a new song. Care to sing it for Steve at the party?” He grinned.

“I don’t know how you know about that song, but fine. I think he would like it. Avengers only though! I’ll sing something else for all the guests.”

She rolled her eyes at the memory as she finished getting ready. Luckily she was ready early because Tony came running into the room in a panic.

“He’s here!” Tony’s smile widened as he thought about the nights events. “Let’s go!” He practically pulled her from the room, far too eager to share news that wasn’t his.

Tony had Y/N set up on stage right in time for Bucky and Steve to arrive. She sat behind a piano, ready and waiting for Tony’s cue.

As the guests of honor entered the main ballroom, Tony stepped up to the microphone. Steve stared at Y/N with questioning eyes while ignoring Tony’s speech. She smiled lightly, shaking her head at Tony in an effort to explain.

Steve laughed to himself, wishing for nothing more than to hold her after a long 5 months away.

“Give it up for Y/N L/N!” Tony’s introduction came to a close, signaling for her to start playing. It really was over the top considering he was only introducing her to the people who have become family to her, but she let him do his thing.

“Thanks, Tony.” She smiled fondly at Steve before introducing the song. “I wrote this song for someone special. As you all know, my parents died in a car accident a few years ago. Don’t worry, the song’s not that sad.” She earned a few laughs from her friends before she continued. “Ever since I was little, I wanted a love like theirs. It seemed so magical. Well, I found that love.” She smiled at Steve again.

“This one is called Like My Father.” With the name of the song announce, she started singing. Her eyes never left Steve’s.

I wanna come home to roses

Today had been the day from hell for Y/N. First, she woke up late due to accidentally setting her alarm for 6 pm instead of 6 am. She rushed to get out of the tower on time, only for the subway line she was supposed to take to be closed for repairs, making rushing a complete waste since she was going to be late anyway.

In her haste to leave on time, she forwent breakfast which only made her more irritable. By the time she made it to the studio, she had missed her morning meeting and had to play catchup.

The day only got worse from there. Something went wrong with every song she was meant to work on. Sometimes it was a small thing, like a guitar being out of tune. Other times, the song just didn’t feel right. No matter how many different ideas she tried to work on, she just kept running in circles.

By lunch, she was ready to give up and just go home. Unfortunately, her label was having a meeting to discuss progress for the next album’s lead single. So instead, she tried to cheer herself up with her favorite lunch. Just when she was sitting down to eat, someone bumped into her and spilled the entire meal onto the floor.

Suffice to say, by the end of the day, she was ready to collapse into her boyfriend’s arms and sleep the weekend away. However, her boyfriend was currently on a mission out saving the world, so not even he would be able to lift her spirits this time.

She trudged down the hall toward their shared apartment, eager to take a shower and lay down. It wouldn’t be as comforting without Steve, but it was still better than nothing. Finally reaching the door, she turned the key and shoved her way inside. Instantly, she stopped in her tracks.

The scent of tomato sauce filled the air. The soft sounds of Steve’s old music floated through the air, further adding to the welcoming atmosphere. She stood frozen, eyes filling with tears when Steve noticed her. He smiled, too far away to notice the tears, before turning around to get something from the counter. He held whatever it was in both hands behind his back as he walked up to her, a frown slowly forming as he noticed her expression.

“What’s wrong?” He questioned, hands instantly moving around his body to hold her only to be impaired by a beautiful bouquet of white and peach colored roses. Her tears fell despite her smile. She eagerly took the flowers, throwing her arms around him in a tight hug.

“I’m so happy you’re home.” She took a few deep breaths, calming herself before leaning back to press a soft kiss to his lips. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Steve replied easily. “Do you want to talk about it?” Despite not knowing exactly what happened, Steve could tell she had a bad day.

She shook her head, her small smile growing as she inhaled the scent of the roses. “No, I just want to be with you.” She leaned further into the embrace, relishing in the comfort Steve always provided.

“That can be arranged.” Steve smiled, carrying her to the couch to eat.

And dirty little notes on post-its

Three weeks. It had been three weeks since Steve left for his mission and Y/N was still finding his notes around their shared apartment. Every time she added a newly found note to the box, she read through all the previous notes as well. It never failed to cheer her up.

Most of them were simple comments about how much he loved her. Little sayings like “I love you to the moon and back” or “My love for you is as endless as space.” Despite the cheesiness, she couldn’t help but smile with each new note found.

But this newest note was… different. The 21 words scrawled on a bright blue post-it had her flushing instantly.

“I miss the way you feel pressed up against me, can’t wait to come home and pin you against the wall”

Suffice to say, Steve couldn’t come home soon enough.

And when my hair starts turning gray, he’ll say I’m like a fine wine better with age.

“Oh my god.” Her voice was flat as she emerged from their shared bedroom dressed for another one of Tony’s galas. Steve turned to look at her, eyebrows raised.

“What? You look amazing.” He smirked when she blushed.

“Steve. I just found a gray hair.” She pouted, holding the offending piece of hair between her thumb and pointer. “Is this what it feels like to be old?”

“You’re not old.” He chuckled at her dramatics. “And even when all of your hair is gray, I’ll love you even more. Like cheese…” He paused, trying to think of a better comparison. “And wine, you just get better with age.”

“Yeah, whatever.” She rolled her eyes before moving to throw the hair away.

“I mean it. I’m going to love you for the rest of our lives.” He smiled, a familiar fondness in his eyes. She moved closer to embrace him.

“I love you too.”

I guess I learned it from my parents, that true love starts with friendship.

She was nearly running down the street, doing her best to slow down the dog pulling her forward.

“Hudson! Stop!” She tried to speak calmly like her manager- the dog’s owner- instructed, but it was no use. Hudson would not stop running, no matter how hard she tried to make him. “Hudson!” She yelled his name again, surprised when he actually halted.

So surprised in fact, that she was still hurtling forwards, tripping over the now stationary animal. She braced herself for impact, eyes squeezing shut and hands sticking out to catch herself, only for the impact to never come. Instead, two warms hands caught her mid-fall.

Her eyes shot open, heart racing and breathing labored. The man who caught her helped her steady herself on her feet before letting go, smiling sheepishly.

“Thank you.” She breathed out, still taken aback by the turn of events.

“You’re welcome.” He replied kindly. “You’re dog’s pretty strong.” His grimace at his own awkwardness went unnoticed by her as she looked at the dog in question.

“My friends’ dog actually. I’m dog sitting this week.” She smiled, relieved to shift the topic of conversation from her to the dog. “He normally listens really well, but I guess he really wanted to get to the park. I’m Y/N, and this here is Hudson.”

“Nice to meet you both, I’m Steve.” He shook her hand, blushing slightly from the contact. Before she could reply, Hudson leaped at a squirrel, pulling her off balance again. Steve reached out to steady her again.

“Here, let me help.” He shifted the leash from her hand to his own, having a much easier time resisting Hudson’s pulling.

“Thank you… again.” She smiled.

The two walked around the park with Hudson every day that week, becoming fast friends. She wasn’t offended when he didn’t recognize her as one of the biggest names in music, just as he wasn’t offended it took three walks for her to realize he was that Steve Rogers.

They understood each other, despite the wild differences in occupation. Steve could easily relate to Y/N’s aversion to the media. Y/N knew what it felt like to have a team of people relying on you. The two just clicked, and thus a beautiful friendship was formed.

A kiss on the forehead. A date night.

“Hey Steve.” She greeted him warmly when they met up for their weekly coffee. He smiled, but didn’t verbally respond.

The two got their coffee, sitting at a table hidden towards the back. Steve’s replies were short, as if he was thinking of something else during their conversation. By the fifth comment of hers that he merely nodded his head or hummed in response too, Y/N decided to address it. “Are you okay?”

“Go out with me.” He replied quickly, eyes going wide when he realized what he said. Her own eyes widened in response, taken by surprise. “Sorry! I just, I mean- let me start over.” He pleaded, relief filling him when she nodded.

“We’ve been friends for a while now…” She nodded along, eyes still wide. “But, I want more. Let me take you to dinner. And not like we’ve been doing. Let me take you on a date?” He smiled nervously, hands fidgeting with the lid of his coffee cup.

“I’d like that.” She replied simply, unable to form a more complicated sentence due to the butterflies in her stomach.

“Yeah?” He released his breath, unaware he had been holding it. When she nodded, a wide smile appeared on his face. “Good. I’ll pick you up at 7 tomorrow night.”

“You mean I have to wait?” She pouted playfully as they both stood up to leave. He laughed, moving his arm around her shoulders to guide her out of the cafe.

“Just until tomorrow.” He smiled fondly, pressing a kiss to her forehead before helping her into her car.

“Tomorrow then.” She smiled. Tomorrow couldn’t come soon enough.

Fake an apology after a fight

“Y/N?” Steve questioned as he entered their apartment. He looked around, unsurprised to see her covered in blankets on the couch. “I’m sorry.” He tried for a small smile, knowing it was of no real use.

“No you’re not.” She pouted, rolling her eyes. “But I forgive you anyway.” She gestured for him to join her on the couch. He jumped at the chance, quickly moving to hold her close to him.

“I am sorry we fought.” He spoke up after a few minutes, still trying to clear the air.

“Me too. It was stupid.” She shook her head, cuddling closer to him. “I just don’t understand why you like it.” She made a face, grimacing at just the thought.

“It’s good! Pizza has really taken on a whole new life since the 30s.” Steve quipped, smiling when you laughed.

“That doesn’t mean pineapple is an okay topping.” She could fell herself getting worked up again, but ultimately the two burst into a fit of giggles. What a stupid fight.

I wanna road trip in the summers

“Steve! You were supposed to turn there!” Y/N laughed as Steve grumbled about the GPS and his preference for maps. “This is why you should’ve let me drive.”

“Nope, because then I couldn’t surprise you.” He smirked, briefly looking at her in the passenger seat.

“What surprise?” She smiled fondly, knowing he wouldn’t tell her.

“You’ll see. Now turn off the GPS, we’re not actually going home.”

Steve drove for the next few hours until the two arrived at a small house just off the beach in Maine. He pulled into the driveway, turning to find Y/N asleep with her head pressed against the window.

“Y/N, we’re here.” He smiled at her groggy state, laughing when her eyes lit up.

“Are we in Maine?” Her eyes filled with tears, a combination of nostalgia, Steve’s surprise, and residual sleepiness the cause.

“We are. As close as I could find to where you used to come when you were little.” He responded, a shy smile on his face. Despite how long they’d been together, Steve was always nervous about surprising her. “I talked to your manager, and you’ve got the weekend off. We’re going to just relax on the beach for three days.”

“It’s perfect.” She gave him a watery smile, pulling him from the back of his neck until her lips met his. “I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything, just-“ Y/N cut him off with another kiss. It was passionate and heated despite the limited area for movement in the car.

“I love you.” She breathed out the words quickly, but meant it with her whole being. “I love you so much. This is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me.” Tears still burned in her eyes, but the overwhelming happiness she felt made it worth it.

Steve looked shocked at her proclamation, but quickly recovered. “I love you too. More than I’ve ever loved anyone.” Y/N knew exactly what he meant with those words, and it filled her with so much happiness she thought she might combust. He kissed her again, and again, and again.

They shared a few more quick pecks before finally getting out of the car.

I wanna make fun of each other

Meeting Steve’s friends was nerve wracking for a multitude of reasons.

Steve was the only person Y/N had outside of her career. All of her friends were somehow tied to her music, except Steve. Her parents died a few years ago, and she didn’t have any other family. If things went poorly with Steve’s friends, would he leave too?

Plus, all of his friends are superheroes. That’s an intimidating group of people to meet even if you aren’t trying to win them over so you can keep dating their friend.

“Just relax, they’re going to love you.” Steve whispered into her ear as the two rode the elevator up to the main residential floor. Steve did what he could to keep the event simple. It was just drinks with his friends, who happened to be Avengers.

“If you say so.” She smiled nervously, laughing to herself. Before Steve could reply with more words of encouragement, the elevator doors were opening. Steve lead her down the hall to a room that resembled a lounge in a fancy hotel. Bars lined two of the walls, a mixture of blue and white furniture sprinkled throughout the room.

“Ahh, here they are!” Tony Stark quickly rose from his seat, ready to meet the woman stealing away all of the Captain’s time.

“Tony, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is-”

“Tony Stark, I know.” She quipped. In her stress to meet all of Steve’s friends, she forgot to mention that she had already met the billionaire. “It’s good to see you again.”

“Again?” Steve questioned a the same time Tony recognized you. His jaw dropped as he turned back to Steve.

“We met at a fundraiser a few years ago-“ Tony jumped in before you could finish the explanation.

“You’re dating Y/N L/N? The Y/N L/N? Famous singer-songwriter, been topping the charts for years, Y/N L/N?” He balked, eyes rapidly flicking between Steve and Y/N.

“Um… yes?” Steve questioned Tony’s reaction, unsure why he was so surprised. “I told you her name already…” He shook his head, waiting for the teasing he knew was incoming.

“You didn’t mention it was actually her! I just thought it was someone with the same name!” Tony nearly yelled, still thrown off by the surprise.

“What’s going on over here?” Natasha walked up to the trio, one eyebrow lifted at all the noise.

“Y/N L/N!” Tony gestured to her. She nervously waved to Natasha, sticking her hand out in greeting.

“Nice to meet you.” She mumbled, one hand still holding Steve’s in a death grip.

“You too, I’m Natasha.” The two women shook hands, giving Tony time to finally find his words.

“I have to know, did Capsicle recognize you when you met?” Tony lead everyone back to the couches, foregoing the rest of the introductions to start pestering you with questions.

“I think he’s a bit outside of my target audience age wise. I don’t hold it against him.” Y/N replied, laughing when Steve rolled his eyes.

“Oh snap, she just called you old.” Sam chimed in, reaching out a hand to introduce himself. “Sam Wilson.”

You smiled at him, introducing yourself as you shook his hand.

“Here’s the real question. Did you recognize him?” Bucky questioned, already knowing the answer. Steve introduced Y/N to Bucky early on in their friendship when Bucky followed him to one of their weekly coffee dates.

“Bucky, you already know the answer to that.” Y/N deadpanned, not eager to share her lack of knowledge on world events. Steve cut in to answer before Bucky could reply.

“She did not. Told me the name sounded so familiar, but she couldn’t place it.” Steve laughed as he teased you.

“You make me sound so stupid! I knew who Captain America was, I just didn’t realize it was you.” She huffed, annoyed with how quickly the tables turned.

Steve changed the topic by moving to introduce her to the rest of the avengers in attendance; Wanda, Vision, Thor, Clint, Bruce, and Peter.

Y/N continued to share stories with the group, laughing and joking at both her and Steve’s expense. Steve smiled fondly as he watched her interact with his friends, getting along just as well as he knew she would.

I wanna rock out to Billy Joel

“Stupid. All of these ideas are stupid. How am I supposed to put out another album when I can’t even write one decent song.” Y/N huffed to herself, unaware of Steve’s presence in the room.

He moved silently through the room as she continued writing down and crossing out ideas. Suddenly, the sound of Billy Joel’s We Didn’t Start the Fire filled the room.

“Steve?” She jumped at the noise, smiling when she found him next to the record player. “Billy Joel?’ She questioned.

“You played me this song after a bad mission. Told me to think about it whenever I needed a reminder that the world’s problems aren’t my fault. Thought it might help.” He shrugged, a small smile on his face.

“I love you.” She got up from the couch, eager to pull him into a bone crushing hug.

“I love you too.” He returned her hug, careful not to actually crush her bones.

The two of them spent the next few hours playing Billy Joel, dancing and singing around the apartment.

And flip our kids off when they call us old

“Okay, grandpa.” Sam chuckled.

“Hey! I’m the only one allowed to make fun of how old he is.” Y/N playfully glared at Sam, enjoying their newfound friendship. “Plus, he’s younger than Bucky.”

“Rude.” Bucky called from the other couch, mostly ignoring Sam and Y/N’s bickering. It was a bit weird for him to hear someone else yelling at Sam, but he appreciated it nonetheless.

“Everyone calls him old.” Sam narrowed his eyes, confusion playing across his face.

“Yeah, but when it’s not me I have to defend him. Like when Pepper defends Tony from Morgan.” She easily compared her and Steve’s relationship to the couple, not realizing the weight of the moment.

“You see your relationship like Tony and Pepper?” Bucky questioned, now completely focused on Y/N.

She shrugged casually, unaware of the tension she created. “I mean, yeah. I think that’s where we headed.” She would be the first to admit she loved Steve more than she’s ever loved a boyfriend before. She likes to think Steve feels the same. “Why do you ask?”

Bucky shook his head, trying his best to seem casual. “Just curious is all.” He waited a few minutes before leaving, allowing Sam and Y/N to start up their conversation again. As soon as he was out of the room, he asked Friday for Steve’s location.

He had news to report.

He’ll accidentally burn our dinner

“Honey, I’m home!” Y/N called as she walked through the door. She was in a surprisingly good mood after a mediocre day.

“You seem happy.” Steve greeted as he walked into the living room from the kitchen. He pulled her close, kissing her before resting his chin on top of her head.

“I am happy. You’re here, what’s there to be mad about?” She squeezed him tighter, enjoying the feeling of his arms wrapped around her.

“You make me happy too.” He pulled her onto the couch, eagerly kissing her after the day apart. He had returned from a mission just before she left for work, and seeing each other in passing was not enough.

“I missed you.” He mumbled against her mouth.

“I missed you too- is something burning?” She leaned away from him, sniffing the air.

“Shit!” He jumped from the couch, running into the kitchen as you laughed at his antics.

“Steve, language!” She called out in mock shock, laughing harder as he whined about burnt pizza.

And let me be the Scrabble winner

“Steve, sucks at Scrabble? Since when?” Wanda questioned as she ate brunch with Y/N and Nat.

“Um, always?” Y/N replied as if it was obvious.

“I have never seen Steve lose a game of Scrabble.” Nat chimed in, smirking as if she already knew what was going on (and lets face it, she probably did).

“Well, I always beat him.” She shrugged. Wanda smirked, clearly forming a plan.

“Well, you’ll just have to play Scrabble tonight and Nat and I will check if he can play better words or not!” Nat nodded along having seen this plan coming.

“Fine.” Y/N agreed, knowing there was no way of talking them out of this.

-

“Steve! Let’s play Scrabble!” Y/N smiled knowing Steve would give her anything she asked for. He walked into the living room with the box, a grin on his face.

The two of them set up the game and drew letters, immediately jumping into the game. After a few turns, Y/N texted Nat and Wanda to come into the living room to enact their plan. She watched from the corner of her eye as the two women watched Steve rearrange his letters.

When he played CAT for 7 points, Wanda gasped. Steve jumped slightly, turning around to investigate the noise.

“Oh my god.” Y/N’s jaw dropped as she realized Steve’s been letting her win.

“He was all set to play ADEQUATE, for probably a billion points, and he played CAT instead!” Wanda pointed accusingly at Steve while Nat just grinned.

“You’ve been letting me win this whole time?” Y/N threw a pillow at him, upset with the confirmation.

“Not every time! Sometimes I have bad letters.” He rubbed the back of his neck shyly. “You just look so happy when you win.”

A small smile took over Y/N’s frown. How could she be annoyed when he was just trying to make her happy.

“I love you.” She rolled her eyes at his puppy dog look. “But don’t go easy on me this time!”

“I love you too.” Steve smirked knowingly and suddenly Y/N was rethinking everything.

And when my body changes shapes, he’ll say ‘oh my god you look hot today’

“I look fat.” Y/N huffed as she plopped down on the couch, still trying to find a dress to wear out with Steve tonight.

“You’re beautiful.” Steve commented from the kitchen, causing her to shriek.

“You’re not supposed to be home yet!” She placed her hand on her heart, feeling the rapid beating from Steve scaring her.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. But you do look beautiful.” He smirked as he walked closer, easily lifting her from the couch. “You look hot everyday.”

He kissed her passionately to convey just how much he believed what he was saying.

I need a man who’s patient and kind

“Steve, I need a few more minutes!” She called as she ran into their bedroom from the office. The two of them were meant to be leaving for dinner 45 minutes ago, but Y/N’s manager forced her into a last minute meeting with a potential collaborator.

“That’s fine.” He called back, a smile on his face. “Take your time, love.”

“How are you so patient.” Y/N huffed as she quickly changed clothes, annoyed with herself for delaying their plans.

“Hey, it’s okay.” He came up behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and holding her to him. “It happens. I’ve missed dates for mission before.”

“Yeah, but that’s important.” Y/N replied, leaning into his embrace.

“So is your work.” He chuckled as she rolled her eyes.

“Not so important it couldn’t wait a day.” She closed her eyes, taking a moment to just breath. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Steve questioned, genuinely confused.

“For being so kind and understanding. For never making me feel like my job is less important than yours, even though it totally is. For being you.” She replied, easily listing things she’s thankful for.

“Thank you for being you.” He replied casually, still holding her to him. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She smiled before wiggling from his arms to finish getting ready.

Gets out of the car and holds the door

“I’m finally ready. Let’s go!” Y/N called, fully letting go of her annoyance at her manager for delaying her dinner plans.

“Perfect.” Steve grabbed his keys before turning to look at her. He sucked in a breath, eyes slowing gazing over her body. “You’re perfect.”

She blushed, kissing him on the cheek in response. Steve lead her to the car, opening the door for her, pressing a kiss to her lips before jogging around to the driver’s side.

“Where are we going?” She questioned, eager to finally be able to focus on him.

“Dinner.” He replied, a cheeky grin forming.

“Fine, don’t tell me.” She deadpanned, smiling as he laughed.

They discussed anything and everything they could think of as Steve drove to the restaurant, topics ranging from new songs they both liked to what a T-Rex would have for breakfast if it could cook like a person.

Eventually, the car pulled to a stop outside of a small, family owned Italian place. The lights were on, but there was nobody seated at any of the tables.

“Are you sure they’re open?” Y/N questioned, confused by his smile.

“They’re open… just for us.” He smiled shyly. “I wanted you to have a peaceful dinner, so Tony helped me find a place I could book for us for the night. No Y/N L/N or Captain America fans to interrupt.”

“Steve…” She trailed off, unable to form words. She hadn’t even gotten out of the car yet and she was speechless. He walked back around the car, opening the door and guiding her inside. She let him lead her all the way through the building until they reached the outdoor seating.

A string of tapered lightbulbs was strung across the patio, lighting up a single table in the middle. A few candles littered the area, adding to the romantic atmosphere.

“It’s beautiful.” She smiled, leaning in to kiss him before sitting down. Before she could say anything else, a familiar face greeted her.

“My name is Sam, and I’ll be serving you this evening. Can I get you started with something to drink?” Sam smiled at your shocked expression.

“Sam? What are you doing here?” She laughed, confused and overwhelmed with joy.

“I told you, nobody to interrupt us tonight.” Steve smiled, glaring at Sam for playing around. “Sam, I already told you what to bring out.”

“Couldn’t resist.” Sam winked, quickly returning with the drinks Steve requested. Y/N and Steve thanked him before returning to their conversation.

“You didn’t have to go to this much trouble.” Y/N spoke softly, still blown away by the effort and planning Steve must have put into this.

“I know. But I wanted to. You deserve it.” He smiled, taking her hadn’t across the table. “Now, I’ll bet you’re hungry since we were supposed to eat an hour ago.” As if on cue, Sam returned with Bucky, both carrying plates of food. “Let’s eat.”

The two of them continued their conversation from the car as they ate, topics again roaming all over the place. Before she knew it, Y/N had finished eating and Sam was back with dessert.

She looked down at the peach cobbler, laughing to herself. “You know me so well.” She smiled, grinning even more when he offered to share his chocolate cake. “The best of both worlds.”

When she finished eating and looked back up at Steve he was missing from his spot across the table. Instead of sitting in his chair, he was kneeling on the patio beside the table, a velvet box in his hand.

Her eyes widened as she took in the sight before her. Suddenly everything made sense. The lack of rushing, the completely private restaurant, not even having servers in the building. He wanted this to be a private moment.

“Y/N, the day I met you changed my life. I’ll have to thank Hudson for dragging you into the park that day, because I’ve never met anyone as special as you. Every moment with you is like a gift, and I want to spend the rest of my days experiencing life with you. Will you marry me?”

She nodded for a few seconds before finally finding her voice. “Yes.” It was barely above a whisper, but it was enough for Steve to delicately place the ring on her finger. “I love you so much.” She smiled, throwing herself into his arms the second he stood up.

“I love you too.” He replied, framing her face with his hands before kissing her.

I wanna slow dance in the living room like we’re 18 at senior prom

The ride home from dinner was filled with hand holding, giddy squeals, and hundreds of “I love you’s” from both Steve and Y/N. They eagerly ran back to their apartment, giggling like teenagers, high on love.

Steve quickly pulled her into the living room, kissing her over and over. She reciprocated, eager to share her happiness.

“Steve?” She questioned between kisses, waiting for him to hum in response. “Will you dance with me?” She smiled at him. Surprisingly, the two had never really danced together before. The only opportunity would have been at one of Tony’s parties, but they’re always so busy mingling with everyone.

“I’d love to.” He replied, that same fond smile on his face that she’d grown to love more than anything. She clapped, running over to the record player. She chose the first love song she could find, Cheek to Cheek by Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong.

As the music played, the two swayed together, feeling more in love than ever before. Steve quietly sung the words in her ear, expressing all the raw emotion he’d been feeling since she said yes.

“Heaven, I’m in heaven. And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak.” Y/N joined him, singing along to convey her own happiness as well.

“And I seem to find the happiness I seek, when we’re out together, dancing cheek to cheek.”

They danced around the living room for a few songs, letting the record play through. It wasn’t until the music stopped that they even realized the song changed, too lost in the feeling of being together.

And grow old with someone who makes me feel young

I need a man who loves me like, my father loves my mom

“We’re getting married tomorrow.” Y/N floated through the halls, humming Cheek to Cheek again. After dancing to it the night of their engagement, the couple decided it would be their first dance song. Steve walked up behind her, picking her up and spinning around until they reached the kitchen.

“We are.” He replied, just as elated as her. She giggled playfully, smiling wider than ever before. She was just about to say something when Nat and Wanda bust into the room.

“C’mon. It’s time to go!” Wanda called, gathering Y/N’s belongings.

“Where?” The woman questioned, still wrapping in Steve’s arms.

“You’re getting married tomorrow. It’s bad luck to see each other before the wedding.” Wanda spoke as if it was obvious.

“Nat?” Y/N questioned, hoping someone would understand it was just a superstition. Nat just shrugged, helping Wanda as she pulled you out of the room.

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” Steve called after her, a smile on his lips as he thought about seeing you again.

-

Standing at the altar, looking into Steve’s eyes, everything she prepared to say dissolved from her mind. She got lost in his blue eyes, listening to him recite his vows. All the love she felt exploded in one quick statement.

“You make me feel young.” She blurted out the words without thinking.

“Is that another old man joke?” He crinkled his eyebrows, confused by the exclamation. The onlookers chuckled.

“No! That’s not what I meant at all.” She laughed, burying her face in his chest. “I just mean, we’re grown adults.” He nodded, still confused. “But when I’m with you, I feel like a kid again. Like all my problems go away and I can just be in love with you. Like my parents were.” Tears formed in her eyes as she thought about the gravity of her statement.

Steve knew how much her parents love influenced her life. She had multiple songs inspired by their relationship and happiness.

“Oh, sweetheart. You make me feel young too. Like how I should have felt as a kid.” He decided against further explanation, not wanting to weigh down the ceremony with talk of war and his sickly youth.

“I just, I never thought I’d actually find a love like theirs, despite how much I wanted to. I think they would’ve loved you.” Steve wiped her tears as they rolled down her cheeks. He pressed his forehead to hers just feeling the need to be close.

“My ma would’ve loved you too.” He replied, his own throat getting tight. They cried as they finally said “I do”, no place they’d rather be.

And if he lives up to my father, maybe he can teach our daughter

Y/N rose from the piano as she sang the last line, exposing her growing belly to the group of Avengers, but more specifically to Steve.

What it takes to love a queen, she should know she’s royalty.

Everyone cheered for her performance, but her eyes were only on Steve’s. His jaw hung open, tears pooling in his eyes. She made her way to him, everyone moving out of her way.

As soon as she reached Steve, he pulled her into a gentle hug, eagerly kissing her.

“I love you so much.” He whispered, holding her close.

“I love you too.” She replied, just as emotional as he was.

“Are you really pregnant?” He leaned back, chuckling at the “duh” look on her face. She wiped his tears as they fell.

“I found out just after you left.” She smiled, leaning into him as he lowered his forehead to hers.

“We’re going to have a daughter.” He sounded breathless, overwhelmed with the news.

“I would’ve told you in private, but Tony insisted on having this party.” She laughed when he rolled his eyes at Tony’s antics.

“You wrote me a song.” He smiled, still holding her close.

“Oh, baby. I’ve written you dozens of songs.” She laughed when he leaned back in confusion. “They’re not all good. I wanted to finish the album before I played it for you. This was the last song.” She smiled, still overwhelmingly in love with the man in front of her.

“I love you. So much.” They spoke at the same time, swaying together as Tony invited all the remaining guests into the ballroom. They missed the song, but it was clear to everyone the room how much the two loved each other.

permanent taglist:

@averyhotchner

@jesuswasnotawhiteman

@strawberryspence

@sebastnstn

marvel taglist:

@leyannrae

@livstilinski

@oceaniamaddness

@justreadingficsdontmindme

[whatwillyoudodifferently]

Look, Louts! Lilies! - Yuri For A Hope-Flung Present and Hopeful Future

Look, I’ll be frank. I typically try to keep to a more formal tone when I write for this blog. I’m not in a formal mood. It is June October 2020, and I, like the rest of you, have been under quarantine for a little over three almost seven months now due to the Covid-19 virus. Throw in a eensy, teensy bit of massive political movements and change in response to police violence and racism, and an increase of police violence and racism in response to those movements, and I think it’s fair to say it’s been a tumultuous couple of months. Except, strangely, it also hasn’t been, because so much of this time has been characterized by ennui and isolation. Stressful, yet soul-numbing. In short, it’s been a very weird place to be in.

So, we’ve all found our different ways to cope. My sister’s way has been getting really into succulents(?), and my way has been buying digital manga and video games. I’ve finished stuff I’ve put off for literal years and bought stuff I had heard was good but wasn’t that hyped to get into. And somehow, the one thing I’ve really gotten into has been yuri? 

Now, yuri has a very long and rich history, as well as its own sets of conventions and nuances, so it is with a great, great, GREAT deal of respect that I say that I’m going to simplify it for this essay as “Japanese media with a particular focus on romance between women” for brevity’s sake. If you want to know more, there’s actually quite a lot that’s been written about it in English, but I’m aiming this essay at English-speakers who have had at least a little experience with yuri and more than just passing knowledge.

Because you see, I’ve found that yuri fans have a lot of things to say about yuri! And a lot of those things really bug me!! “Yuri is only fetish quasi-porn written by men,” “yuri is only bland wholesome fluff,” “yuri is only high school drama,” so on, so on. It made me mad, but it also made me realize something: a lot of people simply must not know how big this field of lilies truly is! How else can we get people saying “yuri is oversexualized” and “yuri is sexless” as gospel truth? Something’s not adding up here, guys!

So, all that is to say I’m doing something different for this blog: I’m writing up a recommendation list of yuri. A large chunk of it will be stuff I’ve read and can officially give my seal of approval to, while some of them are just titles I’ve heard of that I think will interest others. All of them have been specifically chosen to counter common untrue things I’ve heard about yuri as a whole. I hope you can find at least a few things on this list that you will enjoy and help you keep your head as the encroaching darkness lurches yet a few inches closer!

1. “Yuri is all schoolgirl stuff! Where’s the sci-fi, the period pieces, the action, the fantasy?”

Otherside Picnic

What It Is: A light novel series written by Iori Miyazawa (illustrated by shirakaba). Ongoing, four volumes at time of writing. The story is being adapted into a manga by Eita Mizuno, and an anime adaptation directed by Takuya Satou will be airing in January 2021.

What It’s About: It was on her third trip to the Otherside that Sorawo Kamikoshi almost died, and it was on that same trip she was saved by an angel. Toriko Nishina is a beautiful and confident young woman who also happens to have intimate knowledge of the Otherside, a dangerous yet captivating world that Sorawo can’t help but being drawn to. Toriko convinces Sorawo to join her on her expeditions to the Otherside, fighting off bizarre creatures that have somehow been ripped out of Japanese urban legends and finding strange artifacts in order to make a little extra cash-- all the while keeping an eye out for someone dear to Toriko’s heart.

What I Think: Otherside Picnic is heavily inspired by the novel Roadside Picnic by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky and features several creatures and scenarios from ghost stories, net lore, and-- there’s no other way to put this-- creepypasta. On paper this sounds deeply unoriginal, so it’s pretty surprising that OP has an incredibly strong identity. The idea of fusing horror with a yuri love story excited me enough the moment I heard about it, so when I finally got to read it for myself, I was delighted to find that the horror elements and the romance elements are both quite strong. 

I will say that thanks to the author’s commitment to following his sources of inspiration to the letter sometimes causes him to undercut his own writing (good example: in one arc there’s an ominous train that keeps being mentioned, causing the reader to dread its arrival with each passing page, but seeing what’s on the train will inevitably fall flat in comparison to the reader’s imagination), but those moments are made up by the more original moments-- the things that are left unseen and unexplained.

The place where the story truly shines is the relationship between the two leads. Sorawo and Toriko are great characters, both incredibly charming and deeply flawed, and they achieve a great chemistry with each other right off the bat. Sorawo is a very interesting protagonist, one who turns out to have a deeply tragic past that has made her into a reclusive, somewhat selfish young woman. What’s great is that Toriko, vivacious and confident, everything Sorawo isn’t, accepts this part of her, in a way. Toriko flat out admits she’s not looking for a particularly virtuous person to accompany her, but an “accomplice.” A big part of the appeal of OP is seeing these two “accomplices” bounce off each other, and eventually come to care about each other, all playing against a background of some genuinely spine-crawling horror. Otherside Picnic is a truly underrated series, and I deeply hope that the anime adaption next year will finally get it all the eyes it deserves (menacing phrasing very much intended).

Where To Get It: The light novels are published by J-Novel Club and can be found via various digital platforms and bookstores. The manga will be published by Square Enix Books starting May 2021. The anime will start airing on January 4th, 2021.

Goodbye My Rose Garden

What It Is: A manga by Dr. Pepperco. Three volumes, complete. It inspired a stage play that ran for a while in Japan, but not much information is available about it in English. 

What It’s About: Hanako has two goals: to meet Victor Franks, the mysterious author who pens the books she adores, and to become a writer herself. Despite having the mettle to travel to England on her own to pursue her dreams, she soons finds that it’s difficult for a young, unwed Japanese woman to dream in 20th century London. However, her luck seems to turn around when she meets Alice Douglas, a noblewoman who offers her a job as her maid-- as well as a surprisingly warm friendship. Alice even offers Hanako a way to meet her idol… but at the price of a horrifying request.

What I Think: In the afterword of Volume 1, Dr. Pepperco openly admits that Goodbye, My Rose Garden was the result of them trying to marry all of their favorite tropes (“Victorian maids! Loads of frills! An English family manor!” are some standout items), and this is apparent in the best way possible. GMRG is a lush period piece that will likely appeal to fans of movies like The Handmaiden and Portrait Of A Lady On Fire, with loving attention paid to details like clothes and settings. 

The relationship between Alice and Hanako is quite charming, with Alice supporting Hanako as much as she can while still taking every available opportunity to tease her, while Hanako constantly surprises Alice each time she shows her moxie and strength. It’s an adorable, sweet dynamic, yet a dark, melancholy weight lurks in the background in the form of Alice’s request-- in short, it’s a relationship that feels tailor made for me. Still, I believe this “darkness” never threatens to overwhelm the story, only enhance it in such a way that the reader will soldier on, hoping for a happy ending for our two leads. With an engaging plot and gorgeous art, this is a great manga for both longtime yuri fans and newcomers looking for an introduction to the world of yuri.

Where To Get It: Seven Seas Entertainment has translated the first two volumes, with the final one coming to English soon all three volumes into English.

Seabed

What It Is: A visual novel by paleontology, a Japanese doujin circle.

What It’s About: Mizuno Sachiko is a designer who is haunted by visions of Takako, her vivacious childhood friend and former lover. Narasaki Hibiki is a psychiatrist who wants to help Sachiko make sense of these hallucinations. Takako is… confused, trying to figure out why she keeps losing her memory and why she and Sachiko drifted apart despite being so close. Seabed is a story that spans the pasts and presents of these three women as they attempt to find and understand the truth.

What I Think: At first glance, Seabed seems simple, but it’s a bit of a hard story to explain. In a way, there isn’t much to explain-- it’s a very slow, down-to-earth story that gets almost tedious at times. I think it would be a hard sell to someone who isn’t used to visual novels, but I could imagine it being challenging even for fans. All I’ll say is this: if you give Seabed a chance, it will draw you into a surreal, gentle, melancholy tale akin to slowly sinking beneath the water of a strange, yet not unfriendly sea. For its simplicity, it’s got quite a few surprises in its long, long runtime, and any attempt to explain further will just ruin an experience that’s meant to wash over the reader over time. The only thing I’ll say is the one thing I think everyone knows: the climax will make you cry.

Where To Get It: Seabed is published in English through Fruitbat Factory and is available on Steam, Itch.io, and Nintendo Switch.

SHWD

What It Is: A manga by Sono. Ongoing.

What It’s About: Sawada is one of the few women working for the Special Hazardous Waste Disposal, and the only one in her office. But that changes when the stunningly-strong yet staggeringly-sweet Koga is hired, and the two become close in no time. Sawada trains Koga and soon the two go on their first mission to dispose of the “hazardous waste” left after a recent war… the dangerous, organic anti-human weapons known as the Dynamis.

What I Think: SHWD opens with several close-ups of Sawada’s arm muscles as she works out. I have found that page alone is sometimes enough to convince someone to read SHWD, and if not, pictures of Sawada and-- especially-- Koga are often enough to do the job. In all seriousness, what I love about SHWD can be summarized by something Sono said in an interview about the manga:

‘The first motivating force was "I want to write a yuri manga featuring strong women." I was very drawn to strong female characters by watching "PERSON of INTEREST" and "Assassin's Creed Odyssey." However, I felt that I should differentiate myself by doing something other than a "strong woman" and "weak woman" dynamic. So, I thought about coupling women with different types of strength. This is why all of the SHWD main characters are "strong women."’

It’s a mindset I love a lot. Koga is remarkably strong in a physical sense, but her mental fortitude is fragile due to her past experiences with the Dynamis, and as such, it’s Sawada who uses her immense mental strength to support her. Indeed, every character in SHWD so far bears intense trauma born of the Dynamis in some way, and it’s hard to see how their pasts still hurt them in the present. But that just makes it satisfying to see these women come together to support one another. SHWD drew me in with a unique and often dark action-oriented story with horror elements, but it’s this idea of “strong women” who make up for each other’s weaknesses that really makes it dear to me. 

Also, it can’t be stated enough that Sono is so so so so so (etc) good at drawing muscular women. 

On a completely unrelated note, there’s a side story about Koga and Sawada playing sports together. This includes judo. I am saying this for no reason.

Where To Get It: The English translation of the manga is released in chapters by Lilyka Manga.

Sexiled: My Sexist Party Leader Kicked Me Out, So I Teamed Up With a Mythical Sorceress!

What It Is: A two volume light novel series by Ameko Kaeruda, illustrated by Kazutomo Miya. Possibly complete.

What It’s About: Tanya Artemiciov is an absurdly talented Mage. So why the hell was she kicked out of her adventuring party? Her leader and former friend sums it up in four words: “You’re a woman, Tanya.” In a fit of rage, Tanya channels her anger into a “venting” session that involves swearing her head of and casting a volley of Explosion spells into the wasteland… and accidentally releases a legendary sorceress! Luckily, Laplace is actually quite nice, and just as powerful as the legends say, so the two decide to team up so Tanya can have her revenge!

What I Think: So, this is a silly one, but after a couple of darker entries I think it’s a good palate cleanser. Sexiled is a loud, not-even-remotely subtle, unabashedly feminist take on the “power fantasy” light novel, especially the “revenge fantasy” subgenre-- and even if that sounds awesome on paper to you (ex. me), it will probably feel over-the-top at times to you (ex. me). But in a way, that’s actually kind of its charm. 

I like that Kaeruda utterly refuses to let up on what she wants to tell you, especially because the story was inspired by a real case in Japan. One may be tempted to think “this story is ridiculous, no one would ever be this cartoonishly sexist!” and then you read a news article about how in a famous Japanese medical university was found rigging the test scores of women, and you realize, “oh, people are still this cartoonishly sexist.” So I’m fine with Kaeruda letting it all out in this story. At the same time, I think Sexiled is best when it’s focused not on Tanya’s revenge but on her kindness, and the way her compassion, her strength, and yes, her anger inspires the women and girls around her. 

Sexiled is a fun and often very funny romp about assholes getting theirs, with some surprisingly deep and nuanced moments hiding in a very unsubtle story.

Where To Get It: The light novels are published by J-Novel Club and can be found via various digital platforms and bookstores.

BONUS: Other titles with sci-fi/fantasy/action elements that may interest you!

The Blank Of Describer: A one-shot manga by kkzt about a pair of two dream-builders. They’ve taken all kinds of commissions in the past, but one job they recieve throws them for a loop: a request for a shinigami that can predict and report death. And then comes the kicker: the customer asks the two of them to give it features that the both of them “adore the most…” (Published in English by Lilyka Manga)

A Lily Blooms In Another World: A light novel by Ameko Kaeruda (illustrated by Shio Sakura), author of Sexiled, about Miyako, a Japanese wage slave reincarnated into another world based on her favorite otome game. However, she’s not interested in her would-be love interest, but in Fuuka Hamilton-- the game’s villainess! After Miyako confesses her love, Fuuka decides to give her a challenge: if Miyako can make her say the words “I’m happy” in fourteen days, she’ll stay by her side! (Published in English through J-Novel Club, available on various platforms)

Superwomen In Love: An ongoing manga by sometime about the sentai villainess Honey Trap and her infatuation with the masked superheroine Rapid Rabbit. After being kicked out of her evil organization, Honey Trap decides to team up with her former nemesis to fight evil-- and hopefully, find romance! (To be published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment, coming in April 2021)

2. “Yuri is all stories about teenagers! Where’s the stuff about adults?”

Take a look at the previous section: there’s the stuff about adults! Otherside Picnic, Goodbye My Rose Garden, Seabed, SHWD, Sexiled, The Blank of Describer, A Lily Blooms In Another World, and Superwomen In Love are all stories with adult-aged protagonists! But if you’re searching for a more down-to-earth romance, I’m happy to report there’s quite a bit of options to look into!

Still Sick

What It Is: A manga by Akashi. Three volumes, complete.

What It’s About: Makoto Shimizu is an office lady with a secret: she’s a yuri fan who draws doujinshi. She’s able to keep her two lives separate, all until the day she comes face-to-face with her co-worker at a convention! To Makoto’s horror, Akane Maekawa is amused by her nerdy secret, but Akane may have some secrets of her own...

What I Think: This one was a roller coaster for me: I loved the premise of the manga, but wasn’t sure about the dynamic between the leads… that is, until near the end of the first volume, where something happened and everything changed. Without giving too much away, I implore people to give Still Sick a chance-- it has a much deeper story than one might initially guess, as well as an interesting character dynamic between the two leads with some surprising turns.

Where To Get It: The first two volumes of Still Sick are published in English by Tokyopop, with the final one coming soon All three volumes have been published in English by Tokyopop.

After Hours

What It Is: A manga by Yuhta Nishio. Three volumes, complete.

What It’s About: After being ditched by her friend at a club, Emi Ashiana is ready to write the whole night off. All that changes when she meets Kei, a DJ who seems to be everything Emi is not-- cool, confident… employed.... But Kei and Emi hit it off and Emi’s life changes as Kei draws her into the world of Japan’s club scene!

What I Think: It’s hard to explain exactly why I like this manga, but I reeeeally like this manga. 

There’s just something about the sleek art, the amazing atmosphere of the scenes set in nightclubs, the chemistry between Emi and Kei, the focus on more mature topics.... it’s a manga that’s remarkably magnetic for how down-to-earth it is. It’s also just interesting to read stories about subcultures that don’t normally get a spotlight in comics. To sum it up, After Hours is just a lovely manga that’s severely underrated that’s perfect for someone who’s looking for a story that’s both fun and mature.

Where To Get It: All three volumes are published in English by Viz Media.

How Do We Relationship?

What It Is: A manga by Tamifull. Ongoing, five volumes at time of writing.

What It’s About: Miwa and Saeko’s first meeting is… interesting. But despite that, and despite their clashing personalities, the two of them become fast friends. Well… actually, perhaps more than friends. You see, pretty soon the two of them learn that the other is into women. With that in mind, Saeko suggests they try dating each other-- might as well, right? “Might as well” seems like a strange place to begin a relationship, but perhaps even something like that could end in true love?

What I Think: “Why do romances always end when they decide to start dating?!” That’s the question Tamifull poses in the afterword of Volume 1. And it’s a great question! What makes How Do We Relationship? an interesting manga is how oddly realistic it is, highlighting things like the compromises people make in relationships, people who get into relationships for pragmatic reasons rather than love, the whole “thing” about sex… as well as highlighting the additional issues queer people have to deal with. That may sound like a heavy story, but it’s actually quite light-hearted, as well as very, very funny at times. With a cute art style and surprisingly deep premise, HDWR is a great manga for older yuri fans who are craving a more mature story.

Where To Get It: The first volume has been published in English by Viz Media, with more on the way.

BONUS: Other titles with adult protagonists that may interest you!

Even Though We’re Adults: A manga by Takako Shimura about two women in their thirties. Ayano and Akari meet each other in a bar and almost immediately feel a sense of chemistry between them. There’s just one problem: Ayano is married to someone else. (To be published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment, coming in January 2021)

Doughnuts Under A Crescent Moon: A manga by Shio Usui. Uno Hinako wants nothing more than to be seen as a normal young woman, but she just can’t seem to make a “normal” romance work. But maybe Sato Asahi, a woman who works at the same company as her, can show her a new kind of normal? (To be published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment, coming in February 2021)

Our Teachers Are Dating: A manga by Pikachi Ohi. Hayama Asuka is a gym teacher, Terano Saki is a biology teacher. One day, they come into work both looking suspiciously happy… because they’ve started dating! (Published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment)

I Married My Best Friend To Shut My Parents Up: A one-volume manga by Kodama Naoko. Morimoto is sick and tired about constantly being badgered about finding a man to marry, so her kouhai from her high school days offers a solution: marry each other to make her parents back off! (Published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment)

Now Loading…!: A one-volume manga by Mikan Uji. Takagi has just snagged her dream job at a games publisher, but being put in charge of a mobile game that’s barely pulling in any attention isn’t exactly what she was hoping for. What’s worse, she’s drawn the attention of her strict higher-up Sakurazuki Kaori… who also happened to design her most favorite game of all time?! (Published in English through Seven Seas Entertainment)

3.  “Yuri is all schoolgirl stuff! Where’s- wait, didn’t we already do this one?”

Yes we did. And you know what? I’m making a stand! There’s a lot of really, really good yuri stories set in high schools, and I think more people need to give them a chance! Here are some high school titles that I think are worth a second look for one reason or another!

Bloom Into You

What It Is: A manga by Nakatani Nio. Eight volumes, complete. A twelve episode anime aired in 2018, covering about the first half of the series. A three volume spinoff light novel series written by Hitoma Iruma was also published.

What It’s About: Yuu Koito has long dreamed of the day she’d find That One, Storybook Romance that would make her feel like she was walking on air, but the day that a boy confesses to her, her feet remain firmly planted on the ground. When she meets Touko Nanami, a girl who seems to have the same strange, distant relationship to romance as she does, Yuu feels like she has found a comrade. But what will happen when the next person to confess to Yuu… is Touko?

What I Think: What can I say about Bloom Into You that hasn’t already been said? There’s a reason it’s basically considered a staple of yuri despite being only five years old. The art is beautiful and delicate, the story has a deft mastery of comedy, drama, and romance, and the characters are deeply loveable. Really, the only reason this one is here is to tell you to get to reading this manga (or watching the anime) if you haven’t already. So get to it!

Where To Get It: The entire series-- as well as the spinoff light novel series Regarding Saeki Sayaka-- has been published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment. The anime is currently streaming on HiDive.

Yuri Is My Job

What It Is: A manga by Miman. Ongoing, seven volumes at time of writing.

What It’s About: Hime wants nothing more than to be adored by everyone and to someday bag a rich husband. Of course, being loved by all takes a lot of work, and she prides herself in keeping her perfect, adorable facade so well-maintained. But of course, the one time she slips up, she ends up injuring the manager of a local cafe! Hime finds herself strong-armed into working for this cafe under their star employee, a kind, graceful girl named Mitsuki. But things aren’t quite so simple-- you see, this cafe has a gimmick in which all the employees are constantly acting out yuri-inspired scenes for the customers, so in a way, the employees also have their own facades. And under her facade, Mitsuki… hates Hime’s guts!

What I Think: Yuri Is My Job is an odd duck, but in a good way. It’s advertised and initially framed as a comedy, but it becomes a surprisingly thoughtful drama about the personas people adopt and why they do so (though, luckily, the comedy never truly goes away). There’s an interesting web of relationships between the girls, and having those interactions take place in a setting where they must act out a completely different sort of drama adds an extra level of drama and intrigue. The cute, polished artwork is just the icing on the cake. YIMJ is a good manga for those who are already familiar with yuri tropes and those who are interested in a drama that doesn’t get too heavy.

Where To Get It: Six volumes have been published in English by Kodansha comics, with the seventh on the way.

Riddle Story of Devil

What It Is: A manga written by Yun Kouga and illustrated by Sunao Minakata. Five volumes, complete. A 12 episode anime aired in 2014.

What It’s About: At Myojo Private School, an elite all-girl’s academy, Class Black has a secret. Twelve of the thirteen girls are actually assassins who have been offered a dark deal-- one wish will be granted to whoever manages to kill Haru Ichinose, the thirteenth student. But there’s still hope for Haru in the form of Tokaku Azuma, one of the assassins who has decided to defect to Haru’s side-- and defend her from the other girls at any cost.

What I Think: I’m not sure… if I can say Riddle Story of Devil is “good.” It’s definitely something. Although its premise is vaguely similar to Revolutionary Girl Utena, its tone and atmosphere remind me a lot more of the Dangan Ronpa series. It’s schlocky and ridiculous and often over-the-top and at times exploitative. It’s pure junk food, basically… and I believe that’s where the charm comes from. It’s my guiltiest of guilty pleasures. It may not exactly be good, but more often than not, it’s fun. It’s hard not to be immediately interested in a yuri battle series, you have to admit. 

And if it does have one undeniably good element, it’s Tokaku and Haru’s relationship. They contrast each other nicely, and while one might expect Haru to be boring and helpless, she’s actually quite proactive at times, and some of the most interesting, engaging parts of the series come from seeing how the two work together to fend off the latest assassin. It’s a short read and if anything, it’s worth it to see how each girl ends up. I recommend it for older viewers who are okay with violence and ludicrous battle scenarios.

Where To Get It: All five volumes are available through Seven Seas Entertainment. The anime can be watched through Funimation.*

*Please don’t watch the anime.**

** At the very least, please don’t watch the anime unless you’ve read the entire manga. Riddle Story Of Devil was one of those unfortunate cases where the anime adaption was produced before the manga reached its conclusion, and as such it has a very strange, rushed ending that includes none of what I enjoyed about the actual ending. Several scenes were also changed, and if I recall correctly, fanservice was added in several places where there was none previously. All in all, I’d really only recommend it for big fans of the series.

Side By Side Dreamers

What It Is: A light novel by Iori Miyazawa, illustrated by Akane Malbeni. One volume, complete.

What It’s About: Saya Hokage has been suffering from insomnia, but one day finds relief in the form of Hitsuji Konparu, a strange girl who can put people to sleep. As it turns out, Hitsuji is a person who has the special ability to move freely in their dreams, known as a “Sleepwalker.” The Sleepwalkers have been battling beings that possess people through their dreams, and it turns out they want Saya to join them in the fight.

What I Think: Side By Side Dreamers is short and… well, dreamy. I really enjoyed the premise and I think it’s a good novel for people who think Otherside Picnic may be a little too much for them. I also enjoyed each dream sequence-- I tend to find that the writing in light novels is a little dry, so the use of figurative language to describe these scenes was really refreshing and interesting. SBSD is a fun oneshot that I think is especially ideal for newcomers to yuri.

Where To Get It: Side-by-Side Dreamers is published by J-Novel Club and can be found via various digital platforms and bookstores.

Cocoon Entwined

What It Is: A manga by Yuriko Hara. Three volumes, ongoing.

What It’s About: Hoshimiya Girls' Academy is a strange, almost otherworldly paradise with a peculiar tradition. For all three years, each girl grows out her hair to absurd, breathtaking lengths, in order for it to eventually be cut and weaved into uniforms for future students. Perhaps it is these strange uniforms that seem to whisper about the past that makes the school seem frozen in another time… picturesque, yet stagnant. But one day, a shocking incident shatters the quiet peace of the academy, and the tumultuous feelings that have long been hidden in the hearts of these girls come rushing into the light.

What I Think: Cocoon Entwined is, in a word, eerie. It’s not marketed as a horror story, and I don’t think it’s intended to be one, but I’ve seen some that say they get horror vibes from it. I definitely understand that-- there’s a deep sense of unease that permeates the entire story in a way that’s a bit hard to articulate. The running thread of uniforms made from human hair definitely doesn’t hurt (it does-- I’ve seen many people understandably turned off by this element), but it’s more than that. It’s the sense that everything at Hoshimiya feels frozen and fragile. It’s the sense that everyone is burying their true feelings under countless layers. It’s the fact that in one scene, Saeki reaches out in a dark room full of uniforms and feels her arm touched by countless hands made of hair. 

Cocoon Entwined is a strange manga, and I feel it’s not for everyone-- besides the way many are put off by the central premise, the way that the story jumps around in time can be a bit confusing to follow. But in my opinion, I love it for these elements: the uniforms and their marriage between beauty and grotesque, the sense of frozen time, the delicate artwork that feels like it might be shattered by the weight of your gaze, the strange, airless atmosphere, the girls and their clear exhaustion of having to be ideal women. It’s a strange little series that I think should be given a shot, particularly if you want something a little more out there, or a darker take on Class S tropes.

Where To Get It: Yen Press has currently published two volumes in English.

BONUS: Other high school titles that may interest you!

A Tropical Fish Yearns For Snow: A manga by Makoto Hagino. Konatsu Amano has just moved to a new town by the sea, and must deal with her new school’s mandatory club policy. Luckily, she meets Koyuki Honami, an older girl who runs the Aquarium Club. Recognizing her loneliness, Konatsu decides to join her club. (Published  in English by Viz Media)

Flowers: A four-part series of visual novels published by Innocent Grey. Flowers focuses on Saint Angraecum Academy, a private high school that prides itself on overseeing the growth of proper young ladies. One notable thing about the academy is the Amitié program, a system that pairs students together in order to foster friendships between the girls. But friendship isn’t the only thing blooming… (Available in English from Steam, J-List, and JAST USA)

Adachi And Shimamura: A series of light novels written by Hitoma Iruma and illustrated by Non that has recently received a manga adaptation and an anime adaption. Adachi and Shimamura are two girls who encounter each other one day while cutting class. Little by little, the two girls become a part of each other’s lives, and feelings begin to form. (The light novels are published in English by Seven Seas Entertainment, the anime is licensed by Funimation)

And there we go! 24 different yuri titles. I didn’t even go into the series that I tried but personally didn’t like that still might interest other people. I primarily made this list to gush about yuri that I liked, but I also tried to include a fairly wide range of things so that, hopefully, any random person who read this whole list could find at least one new title that interests them. And I hope that includes you!

The yuri scene is quite large and wonderful if you know where to look, and it too often gets a bad rap. I hope that this list could give you a new perspective on what kinds of titles are available, and I hope it gives you something new to try. And remember: if you want something specific, try looking for it! There’s a good chance the story you’re craving is already out there, waiting to be discovered!

[fandoms-galore-yall]

MatachaBlossom as Gods Au pt 2

Greetings! This fic is based off the wonderful art of @shaky-mayhemm (Check it out here!)

This is pt 2, pt 1 is here

________

The plan, while requiring a lot of preparation, was fairly simple. Kojiro would pretend to be drunk and distract Ainosuke and Tadashi. Carla, in her invisible form, would gently guide Miya to a secluded area and Kaoru would talk to the boy. 

Since discovering Ainosuke’s intentions, Karou had been sending Carla to the boy’s town to get an idea of why he had caught the God of Destruction’s attention and how to help him get away. 

Karou hated to admit it, but he had felt uneasy every time she left his immediate area. Like a part of him was being cleaved. He had gotten used to always having Carla, if no one else, by his side.

While he didn’t say anything to Kojiro, the God of Earth hadn’t made any trips to Earth during the last few months before the festival and had spent every night that Carla was gone, with him, holding him and comforting him. 

It had been the only way Karou could sleep without Carla’s singing. 

He would be glad when this would be over, for many reasons. 

Though he supposed that having Kojiro’s voice lure him to slumber hadn’t been the worst thing. 

Still, he was worried about the plan. The thought of Ainosuke or Tadashi catching Carla in the act and then harming her terrified him. 

Furthermore, while he knew that Kojiro could take care of himself, he didn’t want him to get hurt ethier. Ainosuke couldn’t do anything to him physically during the festival but words can still cut even a God down. 

And perhaps, his biggest fear, was that he would fail in his role.

Ironically, despite being the God of Life, Karou was not the most comforting of Gods. 

Oh, he could play the part for a crowd of humans- a pretty shiny beautiful thing for them to admire from afar, never really seeing the truth behind the gentle smiles he wore as a mask.

But when faced with genuine feelings? 

Helping people with their emotional state? 

Well, his best was leading the person in distress to Kojiro and having the other God fix the problem. 

His worst was patting their shoulder, from a short distance away, and trying to make comforting sounds whenever Kojiro wasn’t available. 

Karou is big enough to admit that dealing with feelings isn’t his strong suit. 

Which is why he thinks it ludicrous that Kojiro had insisted it be him to talk to the young boy, Miya. 

Karou assumes it has more to do with Kojiro’s determination to keep his lover as far away from Ainosuke as possible than it is his faith in Karous's ability to handle the situation if Miya were to start crying. 

Karou sighed as Carla faded from his side, seemingly disappearing into the air around her. Karou could still sense her presence but no one else would be able to unless she meant for them to. 

As she got into position near Miya, Kojiro began to ‘drink’ heavily. 

Karou made his way to the gardens on the lower level of the grand palace made for the Gods when they weren’t in the Heavens. 

Carla began to gently pull at Miya’s sleeve to subtly lead him there as well. 

During Carla’s trips to Miya’s home town, she had learned that the boy loved animals which is why the God had borrowed one of the minor Gods Oka’s pet fox Sketchy for this conversion. 

He hoped that it would help distract the boy from any awkwardness that might come from having this conversation. 

Karou heard the boy enter and took a deep breath to calm his nerves. 

Miya took one look at who stood before him and breathed out, perhaps with relief? With wide eyes the boy stepped forward without fear.

“I thought you were going to be Lord Ainosuke”.

“Ah, so then he’s spoken to you about his intentions directly?”

“He has, Lord Karou.”

Karou wrinkled his nose. He normally didn’t react when humans used honorifics but for some reason, it bothered him, when this boy said it with no emotion whatsoever, face now blank. 

Karou hummed at his admission and then gestured for the boy to follow him. He did. 

Karou sat on a patch of grass, near a fountain, and placed Sketchy down on the grass for Miya to see. Previously hidden, bundled in a cloth, the boy lit up at seeing the fox before seeming to remember himself and schooling his features. 

“You may sit and pet him, if you are gentle with him.” Karou told him and Miya quickly walked over, sat, and began petting the fox. 

“You’re an intelligent boy,” Karou began, “I’m sure you know how most of Ainosuke’s disciples do not find their story to have a pleasant end?”

Miya’s shoulders were hunched in and his face hidden when he answered, “I do.”

“And you’re still interested in being his disciple?” 

“He said he’d grant me my wish.”

Karou hummed again, lost in thought. 

One of the reasons Ainosuke continued to get disciples, despite his reputation, was that he would grant wishes that no one else would.

Of course, it was rarely worth a year stuck under his thumb, but often greed or desperation blinded them to the warning signs. 

“I might be wrong, but I’m assuming your wish involves the boys who your parents think you’re with when you're not studying or practicing your future craft that you actually seem to avoid as much as possible?

Miya’s head shot up and he couldn’t mask the look of surprise on his face, “How...?”

“I’m no God of Knowledge or Wisdom but I am a Higher God. There is not much that mortals can hide from me.”

Miya narrowed his eyes, perhaps in suspicion but then caught himself and smoothed out his expression once more.

“Yes, that is correct.”

“How so?” 

Miya sighed. “I thought you already knew everything.”

“Not everything,” The God said as gently as he knew how. “I need you to fill in the final pieces.”

“They… We… They were my friends and then my parents started pushing me to be ‘perfect’ and so I was and they hated it and then they hated me… I just want my friends back…. I just don’t want to be alone anymore.”

Miya seemed surprised by his own honesty and his eyes started to tear up.

Karou silently cursed Kojiro and turned away to get control of himself. 

“Ainosuke won’t make the loneliness go away, not really.” Karou said in his softest tone. “He’ll spend the year breaking you down, then he’ll grant your wish, but he’ll do so in a way that is as twisted as him…”

Karou was silent for a moment as he thought about how Ainosuke would “solve” Miya’s problem and noticed how Miya refused to look his way when he turned to fully face the young boy. 

“He’ll probably make it so that your old friends are like puppets, they’ll act like they love you but there will be no life behind their eyes. Which isn’t really what you want, is it?”

“No,” Miya whispered, trying to hold back tears. Karou hoped he was being kind by not pointing it out. 

Miya buried his face in his hands and mumbled into them.

Karou raised an eyebrow with a gentle chide, “I’m not sure if I was supposed to understand that?”

Miya snuffed, raised his face just enough for his words to come out clear, “What do I do now?” 

“Well, to not offer yourself as a disciple at all would be one option.”

“My parents want me to.”

“Even if it were with The God of Destruction?”

“No risk, no reward.”

Karou hummed again, “Another option would be to join my or Kojiro’s service instead.” 

“The God of Earth?”

“Yes, he’s currently acting as a distraction so that we may have this conversation”  Karou explained.

Miya nodded, “And yours? You haven't taken a disciple in over three decades?”

“That’s true, but I would be willing to make an exception for you”.

Miya seemed angry with his response. “I don’t need your pity.”

The God sighed, “I apologize. I phrased that incorrectly. It would not be pity. I don’t need any disciples but I’ve seen you as you work on your craft. You are a talented young man, I’d be glad to have you in my service...

“Though, perhaps you would prefer Kojiro’s service instead? He tends to be better with” Karou waved his hand around, “people.” 

Miya giggled but tried to pretend he hadn’t when Karou glanced over. The God of Life gave him a small smile to let him know it was alright. 

“But most of all, whoever’s service you enter, our main concern is your safety. Even if you decide to serve Ainosuke you may come to us at any point, for help”.

Miya nodded, listening but clearly getting lost in his own thoughts. 

Karou stood, “The ceremony will begin soon.” Miya stood as well, and handed Sketchy over. 

Karou plucked a flower, from a nearby tree, and placed it in Miya’s hair.

The flower glowed for a moment, becoming a blessing from a God, “For safety and for luck.” Karou told Miya. 

Miya stood shocked for a moment before bowing to the God and exiting the Garden, once again led by Carla. 

Karou thought about the ceremony as he made his way to his throne. Each God had their own, where offerings were left and where any chosen disciples would go to after being taken into their God’s service. 

There were a couple ways one could offer themselves as a disciple. 

The first would be to offer themselves to any God. Any God interested would light a flame next to their throne, then if only one God had shown interest, the human would enter their service. If multiple had, either the human would choose which God to follow or sometime the other Gods would back down.

No God had ever fought over a disciple with Ainosuke before. If Miya opened himself up to any God’s service, he and Kijiro would be the first.

The second way was for the potential disciple to specifically offer their service to a select God or select few Gods. Then as before, if multiple of those Gods were interested the human would choose, unless any Gods backed down. 

Karou assumed that Miya would use the first method, he just hoped that the boy would choose Kojiro’s or less likely, his own service. 

He sat on his throne. Kojiro’s was right next to it.

The God of Earth looked over and Karou nodded, letting him know that the conversation had happened and that he thought it went well. 

Kojiro gave him a smile, the one that said he was proud of Karou. Karou scoffed and looked away. 

Kojiro’s response was to try and play footsie with him. Karou rolled his eyes, kicked at the other’s ankle, and ignored the other God’s pout. 

 Now really wasn’t the time. 

Karou allowed himself to be distracted, knowing Carla would let him know when the boy was up. 

Carla’s hand landed on his shoulder and he schooled his mind back into focus. 

Miya was walking up and a Minor God was listing off his accomplishments.

After that, the Minor God was supposed to immediately explain if any God could express their interest or if they were only hoping to serve a specific God or Gods. 

However, the Minor God frowned at the paper before him and Karou felt his heart sink.

Perhaps the conversation hadn’t gone well after all?

Kojiro took his hand and Karou held on tightly, allowing the other God to ground him.

“Miya Chinen offers his service to only one God…”

Karou stopped breathing and thought he might have heard Kojiro grunt from how hard he was holding onto the other’s hand but too much of his attention was on the Minor God speaking to truly notice.

“Karou, The God of Life”.

Karou let himself breathe again. 

The God of Life shifted so that his hair covered his face so that no one could see his amused grin. 

The boy was testing him, seeing if the God of Life was really in his corner. 

Normally, that would annoy him but...

Karou waved his hand, igniting the flame next to him, to let everyone know he had accepted the boy’s service. 

No risk, no reward indeed. 

From his peripheral vision he saw Kojiro shake his hand and stretch his finger now that they were no longer in Karou’s death grip. 

Miya, from the stage below them, bowed to him. 

I’m having a lot of fun with this story, so I’ll be adding more! 

Whatever Miya’s craft is I think will be the stand in for Skateboarding in this story.. which means I just have to figure out what his craft should be lol! 

Hope you all enjoyed! :D 

[macherkissed]

Wrapped Up in Pretty Ribbons-Billy Lenz X Female Reader

18+

Summary: The Moaner has taken a special interest in you that’s more than a little reciprocated. When the star of your secret perverted fantasies gives you the opportunity to make it reality, you take it.

Word Count: 4,126

Notes/Warnings: Typical Billy stuff (Dirty Talk, Voyeurism), Female Reader, , Masturbation, Clothes Stealing,  Slight Somnophilia, Penetration, Choking

What a good way to start the day. First you slept through your alarm, then you had no idea where you left your shoes so practically destroyed your room to find them, and in your hurry to go downstairs you almost fell flat on your face.

The only person up at this time was Claire, making a pot of coffee and greeting you with a smile “Morning.” “Hey.” You muttered, leaning against the counter and using the reflection of the toaster to help you twist a deep-orange ribbon into your hair “Where’s everyone else?” “In bed, Barb is probably trying to sneak out her ‘bedmate’ by now.” You sighed and rolled your eyes, unseen by her. You liked her, you really did, but she could be a little judgemental. “Good for her. At least someone’s getting some.” You ignored the slight scoff from her, the hypocrite, and carried on twisting the ribbon as well as you could into your hair. The second it was up to your standards, you stood and stretched, the toaster shooting toast up just a second later. Claire placed a mug of coffee in front of you and you thanked her before downing it in three gulps “I’ll see you later, give the girls my love.” “Have a good day.” She called as you left.

You didn’t notice, as you walked away, the figure in the attic window watching you. Minutes later, the phone rang.

When you finally got back home, to the girls, you felt like you could actually breathe properly. Work sucked, you’d had to rush your errands, it had been such a long day. All you wanted to do was listed to Barb tease Jess and Claire, and sit around with the other girls, cuddling up with Claude “Wow. I’m liking today’s look.” Phyllis trilled as she saw you. “Oh, thank you.” With a smile, you pulled at the ribbon awkwardly “It’s gotten a little loose but I think that makes it look a bit better.” “Definitely, you look great. Doesn’t she, Barb?” “Absolutely gorgeous.” She didn’t look up for that long, but it still made you smile. “I’m going to get into something more comfortable.” You were waved off and scuttled upstairs, already removing your shirt since you were only in the company of girls and they were practically sisters to you.

The shirt was dropped away to the hamper beside your door, quickly followed by your bra. It was as you were shuffling your jeans down your thighs that you heard it; a growl, coming from behind you. You shot around, instinct making you cover your chest. But there was nothing there, no one at all, and you sighed at your stupidity: It was an old house, the pipes would groan and the walls and doorframes would shift, you should be used to this. But with the Moaner… Shaking all thoughts of him away you finished getting undressed and put your comfortable clothes on. Your ribbon came out with a simple tug and was left in the box with the others. Ever since one of the other girls, Elaine, had put ribbons in your hair for Barb’s last birthday party, you’d gotten a little obsessed; now you had ribbons for your hair, your waist, your neck, even to curl up your arms when you felt like it. It had sort of become your Thing. Now, you just settled for a white bow around your left wrist before you went downstairs again

You’d hardly settled down on the chair, with your bowl of soup curtesy of Jess, when the phone rang. It was Phyl that answered since she was actually in the hall. No one paid attention, carrying on with their own conversations until she called out a strangely familiar phrase “It’s him again!” In seconds, everyone was crowded around as you strained to hear what filth he’d say this time. As always, he just moaned and groaned and made vulgar animalistic noises, up until he almost giggled “Such a pretty piggy.” He growled and started snorting like a pig himself for a few seconds “I bet your cunt is just as pretty. I’ll ruin it, I’ll…” He let out a rumble, not exactly a moan and almost a snarl “I’ll take that…that purple ribbon and I’ll wrap it around your throat.” All eyes turned to you, as your heart dropped straight to your gut and your blood froze. Of course, you had a purple ribbon, you had a few of them. A lilac one you had was definitely long enough to had around your throat, you’d worn it tangled up your arm in a criss-cross pattern just two days before “I’ll choke you with it, pull you back onto my cock. You’ll scream for me. Scream for Billy.” A deep blush started to bleed across your cheeks as, inexplicably, your mind trailed to the thought of this faceless crude man coiling the length of fabric around your neck and using the ends as reins to drag you back to meet the movement of his hips as he fucks into you, you being unable to do much more than take it.  Another pornographic moan of pure pleasure came from the phone, followed by a dark growl of a laugh that was cut off by him placing the receiver down.

As always when the moaner ended his calls, everyone was silent for a beat or two before, as expected, Barb broke it “He’s getting more creative.” “Barb.” Jess sighed. “What? At least he’s putting effort into it now.” “You’re so insensitive.” Clare sighed, no one noticing as you wandered back to your chair and your soup. “Like hell I am.” “He blatantly threatened Y/N.” Jess said, a little more forcefully. “If you think that’s a threat then I really pity Peter.” “Wait, where’s Y/N?” Rebecca said, only just audible to you from the living room. Her and the others came in quickly to see you sat quite cosily with a spoon in your mouth. “Hey.” You said, slightly muffled around the utensil and quite well hiding how flustered you were. “Are you okay?” Jess asked with that worried frown she did so well. “Yea.” You shrugged casually “He’s just a creep, I’m not going to let him get to me.” “Are you sure?” “Of course she’s sure. She’s stronger than any gross shit he can say.” Your smile was, considering the situation, quite sweet towards the girls. “Thanks, Barb. Let’s just forget the weirdo, and carry on.”

But you didn’t forget about him. It was a dirty secret even to yourself, that sometimes after his dirty calls you’d end up touching yourself to the thought of a perverted stranger groaning depraved things as he fucked you like he promised; you always told yourself that of course it wasn’t the mysterious caller you were imagining but it was getting trickier to do.

You were one of the first to bed, using your busy day as a quick exit without more questions on if you were okay. More than thrilled to finally be alone and undisturbed (though you loved the girls), you stripped totally and changed into your sleep shorts and a large shirt before snuggling under the covers. As you lay in the darkness, the moaner’s words echoed again in your head: they were disgusting, obscene and violent and repulsive, but you still found the image coming to you so clearly yet again. Your hands absently came to your breasts and started to pinch and stroke and tease your nipples for some form of dull pleasure as you felt a heat begin to flower between your thighs. You tried to recall Billy’s voice as he called you pretty , as he called you –all of you- sluts and whores, as he said that you were all sweet little cunts waiting to be fucked, all the filthy things he’d terrify the girl’s hearts with in the day and torment your mind with at night.

One hand snaked into your shorts and trailed down to your entrance, surprising yourself with how wet you already were. As you started to rub your clit, eyes falling closed and gasps escaping your throat, you didn’t notice the crack in the closet door widen a little, or the eye peeking out and trained on your covered body, or the gentle sound of skin rutting against skin or the low breaths, you were too caught up in your mounting pleasure and the fantasy intruder touching you and restricting not only your movement but your breathing. Experimentally, your hand came up to curl around your throat just to feel. You couldn’t tighten your grip as much as you’d like, not without surrendering your ability to touch yourself, but what limited pressure you could give only seemed like a tease in your fantasy; a false sense of security and softness before he pulled the ribbon taut and wrapped it around his fist to pound you as he said he would, making you his piggy slut. It was, surprisingly, the thought of him growling your name that brought you over the edge. And, while you didn’t scream his name, a laboured moan of “Billy” did slip from your lips. Yes, shame did take over eventually as you were cleaning yourself up, but it wasn’t as if anyone knew.

But only if you knew, as the figure waited until you were asleep before leaving his hiding spot in the closet and retreating back into the attic, with a cotton souvenir snatched from the top of your hamper.

The next morning, you adorned your neck with a black and hot-pink striped bow and quietly pattered down the stairs. Today you weren’t out so quickly, so you could have some breakfast and actually enjoy your coffee. As you wandered past the stairs to the living room with a slice of toast in your mouth, the phone rang. As you all seemed to, almost forgetting Him, you answered with an innocent “Hello?” Only to be greeted with those deep growly moans yet again. Traitorous heat flared up between your thighs at the animal sounds. “Your pussy smells so good. I want to taste it, want to lick it….Oh, want to lick it.” Nothing much out of the ordinary then. You’d feign disinterest, hang up, and keep his babbled filth in your mind for later. Leaning against the table, you bit the inside of your lip and listened to the typical repeated snorted and snarling and promises to make you scream and to ruin you with his cock.

He got no reply, evidently, so changed it up with a dark chuckle “You look very pretty when you cum.” It only shocked you, at first, how clear he was speaking. You hadn’t heard him ever sound anything but distorted and monstrous “Like such a desperate slut, with your hand around your throat and moaning for Billy.” You didn’t mean to gasp but how could you help it. The moaner had been in the house, in your room, as you were masturbating, to thoughts of him. That little noise pulled a laugh from Billy “Yes, I saw you. You like Billy, don’t you? You want Billy to fuck your hungry cunt.” With your eyes squeezed closed, you shifted and pressed your thighs together tightly. There was so much fucked up about this, least of all the voyeuristic intruder hiding in your bedroom, but you were still terrifyingly turned on by him “Don’t you want me to fuck you?” When you didn’t answer after a few seconds, you heard a growl “Don’t you?!” “Yes.” “Keep your door open a little for me tonight.” Then he hung up, leaving you gormless for a few seconds before you put the phone down.

There was no way that this was real. He was just chatting shit, to shake you and get his sick kicks from it. He would have said that to any of you, he probably didn’t even know the names of any of you. So you shook the conversation out of your head and went back to getting ready for the day, insistent on forgetting the call.

Of course, just as the night before, you didn’t forget. It stuck with you all day, through your job and as you came back to the house and started studying (it may have been winter break but that didn’t mean you could slack off) and even through the bit of drama that flared up between Barb and Mrs Mac. For the second night in a row, you excused yourself to bed early. The girls noticed “Are you feeling okay?” Claire asked just as you stood to leave. “Hmm? Yea, of course. I’ve just been…Having a hard time staying asleep. I thought that if I go to bed earlier, even if I wake up a lot, I’ll get more sleep.” It did little to stop the worried looks on their faces but you were allowed up to bed at least.

It was ridiculous that you hesitated closing the door, but you were…curious. The likelihood of Him actually behind here was quite low, so why would you leave the door open? But then what would the harm be to leave it open just a little? You felt ridiculous for actually leaving the door open, barely enough to be noticed, yet you still did and quickly undressed for bed. Rather than slipping on another pair of cosy shorts or pants, though you had plenty, you chose to instead go completely bottom-less beneath your large shirt as you crawled into bed. For about an hour and a half until you fell asleep, every noise made your ears perk up; the creak of the stairs as the other girls came up to bed, the doors squeaking when they’d tiptoe down the hall, every groan of the walls and the pipes put you on edge. When the door opened a little, you waited with a thumping heart just for a few seconds before turning towards it.

Claude was there, looking up at you sweetly and licking his little nose. You groaned and got up instantly “Get out of my room, kitty. Go.” A ‘mmph!’ of distain came from the fluffball as you urged him out of your room and down the hall a little “Go cuddle Mrs Mac.” Barb’s door opened, making you shoot up and pull your shirt down a little to cover your dignity. Barb stepped out twice before she noticed you, leaning against the wall with a slight smirk. “Oh, wow. Do you usually sleep like that?” “Uh, no. Can you just-“ “-Is there someone in your room?”  She teased as she moved to peak into your room, making you frown. “No.” “Are you waiting for someone?” “Piss off, Barb.” You pouted as a blush started to creep over your cheeks, quickly scuttling away into your room as her laugh trailed behind you. You didn’t close your door all the way, looking towards it almost hopefully until you finally fell asleep.

It seemed like not even a minute before you were woken up, being turned onto your stomach slowly. You didn’t even open your eyes until the first press of lips against your neck. It was totally dark, and you could feel the weight of someone at your back “Such a dirty slut.” How did his voice sound even hotter, fuck. His hands slowly slid down your back, bunching the blanket down as he did “Waiting for Billy like this, you’re a naughty piggy.” When his hands came to your hips, bare of the shirt that had ridden up a little, he looked down almost shocked before he gripped your hips tightly  “All ready for me? You really do want Billy.” His lips came to your ear and he growled “Are you wet as well?” Teasingly slow, his hand traced from your hip to your ass, leaving a harsh spank there before trailing down between your thighs to part your pussy lips and draw his middle finger across your slit.

Even you were surprised at how wet you were already, and Billy evidently appreciated it if his moan was any indication “Naughty teasing slut.” He punctuated his degradation by pushing two fingers roughly into you. It probably would have hurt, more than just stung as it did, if you weren’t as turned on as you were, and you let out a gasp of a moan as you gripped the pillow tightly. Instantly he set a brutal pace of fucking you with his fingers, not even bothering to try and find your sweet spot. “Billy, fuck.” You whined, trying to shift just slightly and raise your hips, to get him deeper.  He chuckled and pulled his fingers back a little more “Billy.” His other hand, at your pathetic whimper, moved from your hip and you heard him fumbling with his trousers. “Do you want it? Do you want me to fill your pretty piggy cunt with this cock?” “Fuck yes.” He chuckled darkly before moving back a little and pulling your hips up just enough to trail the head of his cock across your pussy.

There was no tease, no suspense, hardly any anticipation before he deemed you both ready and first pushed into you. Just the feeling of the tip breeching into you was perfect; you hadn’t had sex in longer than you cared to say, and just this much of him showed you that he really would be filling you. The further he moved inside you, the more laboured his breathing got until his hips were flush against yours. He laid himself over your back and spattered biting kisses across your neck and what was exposed of your shoulder. His hair fell in front of your face, soft and light, as he just stayed still against you “You’re so hot and wet, fuck.” Had you not been trying to adjust to the feeling yourself, you would have realised how wrecked he sounded. Later, when looking back on it, you would realise and wonder just how long it had been for him. Though he started rocking his hips slowly, it didn’t take too long for him to really begin fulfilling his promises. Each slight thrust was enough to shift the bed a little, nevermind make your eyes flutter and your grip tighten on your pillow as you smothered moans into it. With one hand stuck on your hip, his other curled around to your stomach before snaking upwards to grope your breast. Another animal growl came from him as you moaned his name and tried to rocked back against him, his fingers closing around the hard peak of your nipple. Your position didn’t allow you to really do much however, other than arch your back and whine desperately. Through the haze of pleasure in your mind you managed to moan out “Harder.” “Yes. I’ll make you scream, little piggy.”

“Y/N.” You said as he pulled away and started to rise up onto his knees. He paused and you could almost hear him frown. “What?” “My name, is Y/N.” He was still again for a beat or two. “You’d like to hear me say it?” “Yes. You like it when I say yours.” You duck your head and put on a pouty voice, playfully worried “Don’t you, Billy?” “Dirty girl.” He growled, gripping your hips tightly and pulling you to him. You had to raise yourself onto your elbows so you didn’t hit your face on the mattress. In a second, he’d filled you entirely again, seeming to accidentally hit your sweet spot “Filthy, filthy slut. Ma…making Billy think... Naughty things.” Another, now purposeful, roll of his hips distracted you enough that you didn’t notice him reach over to your nightstand and take a ribbon from your collection. Just briefly, he bent over you again and slowly turned your face towards him. You could barely see any detail of his face, just a silhouette “Do you want it harder, Y/N?” A shudder ran up your spine at how he said your name. “Yes, Billy, please.” He chuckled and said nothing before guiding you into a biting kiss.

Near instantly after pulling away, he wrapped the ribbon around your neck; just tight enough that there was a light pressure but you could still breathe at least. Billy almost seemed to hesitate again before you started to rock back and fuck yourself on him just a little. The second that you did, he pulled you back totally, using the ribbon as reigns, so your hips were flush against his. When he started to finally properly move, slowly at first but reaching so deep, your eyes almost rolled back in your head: He felt so good that you couldn’t help but moan quite loudly, company in the house be damned. Billy didn’t mind, he was making just as much noise and your evident pleasure seemed to spur him on if anything.

The room started to fill with those lewd noises and having them echo back to you just served to make you more flustered; you almost sounded as obscene as the pornos you pretended not to have seen, and were sure you looked just as erotic. After all, he was still fully clothed and your shirt was bundled up just above your navel, not even including the ribbon coiled around your throat. Through it all, you heard Billy mumbling to himself, all you could hear of it was dark growls of your name and the occasional strained ‘fuck’ or ‘cunt’. Eventually he pulled the ribbon taught to pull you up onto your knees, managing to cut your air off in the middle of a moan, making the sound end as an almost violent gag. After that point, you were seemingly nothing but a toy; you couldn’t move any more than clenching your fists in the sheets and curling your toes, your moans were barely audible due to the pressure on your throat, you could hardly whisper encouragements and curses that you hoped he could hear. The harder he treated you, the more vocal he became. “You feel so…f’king good.” He grunted out, broken between deep breaths “God, you’re so wet. Such a….pretty slut, Y/N, I love watching you…so much better than the other girls.” Another tug on the fabric tilted your head back further, to the point that if you looked up enough you could see the silhouette of him behind you. Probably you’d have been able to adjust to the darkness and see a little of what he looked like, but the strain was too much so you just closed your eyes. “Billy.” You breathed, as loud as you could “I want to cum, make me cum, please.” A very pleased noise came from him before he twisted both ends of the ribbon around his hand and snaked the other between your legs to toy with your clit gently. However light the touch was, it was just enough to bring you right to the edge.

You trembled from head to toe as your end just kept building up higher and higher. One of your hands came back to grab the ribbon and pull it just a little, hoping that would give you some release. Of course Billy caught on and he easily took over: He wrapped even more of the ribbon around his hand until his knuckles almost touched the back of your neck. In one fluid motion, he pulled you up to his chest, the ribbon cutting off each attempt to breathe. All it took was one more perfect thrust before you came. It was so much stronger than…any you’d had in months. His breathing was quite shallow and his hold on you tight, he seemed to have some difficulty holding back as you came down from your peak. He didn’t last too long after that, whining your name desperately as he hurriedly pulled out of you and spilled his release over the back of your thighs. His lips feel to your neck and spattered kisses along the pink mark that had already started blooming across your neck as he unwrapped the now loose ribbon. You were glad to breathe again but surprisingly more content at the touches Billy was giving you. That didn’t last too long.

“Naughty Billy.” He suddenly muttered to himself, pulling away “Made a mess.” You whined a little when he moved off the bed but he was soon back and cleaning up your thighs. You lay down almost as soon as he was done, exhausted and already feeling slightly sore. Billy didn’t say much more before leaving, and you feel asleep with a smile on your face just a second after hearing the attic door close.

[honeytea8]

✨✨La Squadra Boyfriend Headcanons✨✨

[Alexa, play Boyfriend by Big Time Rush]

Guys, I spend an ungodly amount of time thinking about La Squadra, so here are some bf headcanons for the sexiest group of assassins in Naples. No one asked but I am bringing it straight to your dash anyway! (under the cut for length lmao)

I’m going to start with Prosciutto, who has recently fallen on my radar pretty heavy! 

He’s a good and decent boyfriend, if not a busy one. Not that he doesn’t care about the relationship, but most of his energy was going to Passione things before you waltzed in and so he’ll struggle a bit between his work responsibilities and maintaining his relationship with you, but only in the beginning. 

If you are also a part of Passione, it’s a hell of a lot easier to manage. 

I see Prosciutto as the gift-giving type: lingerie, sweets, perfume, designers, etc. His salary isn’t the best, but he manages it as well as he can just to accommodate you! 

I just can’t get the idea out of my head that Pro was raised by a strict mama, that’s why he can be a bit of a stickler sometimes. He’ll catch you still lounging in bed at nine am, and be like “Why are you still in bed? Get dressed, we’re going out.” Dude!

I’m sorry to say, but Prosciutto is absolutely the ‘lecturing’ type. (He lectured someone in nearly every scene in the anime, Formaggio once and Pesci numerously and Bucci too) 

He will lecture you when you make mistakes, especially because as his s/o, he has high expectations for you and believes you’re capable of so much more. It’s never, ever out of hate. He loves you, and that’s why he chides you a bit lol. 

This does not negate the fact that he doesn't mind when you lean on him for support. He likes when you count on him, because he always comes through especially for you!

Depending on whether you’re in the mafia or not, I totally see him sparring with you, or working out with you in an effort to make you tough. Prosciutto wants you to be able to defend yourself, just in case. If you complain, he’ll tell you, “Better safe than sorry, tesoro”.

Prosciutto will respect you, period.

A good listener, goddamn! He’s up there with Risotto when it comes to who listens to their s/o more! If you have an issue, he’ll hear you out and offer advice if you want it. If you give him advice, he’ll take it into serious consideration. He’s honestly a good partner, can’t stress that enough.

Finally, sex with Pro is an entire event. Romantic dinner, candles lit, wine, the whole nine yards before he gives you nine inches of something else :) (I’m kidding!! Lmao, kinda). 

But as I said, Prosciutto is quite deliberate, and a bit of a perfectionist. He knows what to do and how to do it, you can trust him.

Ghiaccio is next only because he’s my favorite. 

The ice gremlin is probably the most interesting (and hilarious) boyfriend out of the bunch (I say this with only a tidbit of bias). He isn’t funny himself, but funny shit just happens to him. 

Because of this, he will use you as a soundboard when everyone else refuses to listen to him. He’s got a lot to say, so be prepared for his TEDtalks. LMAO!

It will take some perception on your part to notice when he actually expects a response from you, and other times he’s just ranting to get his point out. 

He will correct your grammar when you text, but barely notices when he makes a similar mistake (his brain moves in mph). Please use the proper names like Venezia, Italia, Roma and Napoli when talking to this man; save yourself from the headache.

When it comes to dates, please have mercy on him, he’s a textbook over-thinker! You’ll just have to plan something simple at home for you both to enjoy. 

He isn’t incapable of planning dates, but he’ll want everything to be so absolutely perfect for his s/o and will throw a fit when it ultimately isn’t. 

Contrary to popular belief, I think that Ghiaccio is a pretty attentive partner. He’s super intelligent and I think a part of it stems from his innate ability to read people (I’m referencing the part in the anime where he deduced what Giorno and Mista had come to look for, while going off very little information). 

The more time he spends with you, the better he gets at it. 

His form of affection will be shown through the amount of time you both spend together. When it comes to sex or anything related to that, be gentle and slow as Ghiaccio will likely be a flustered mess. 

As he becomes more comfortable and confident, he will be bolder and just ask out right if you’ll suck him off tonight or not. The man appreciates directness, so don’t bother being coy. “You want me to give you head? Cool, lay down a towel or something.” is what he’ll probably say.

Very practical 👌🏾👌🏾

Melone, good lord, he’s kind of perfect. 

A bit of a doting boyfriend here and there—very much concerned about your health. Expect him to ask if you’ve eaten, or taken your multivitamin. How are your bowel movements?  LMAO

It can become a bit much, but he really genuinely cares. He’s not asking to be intrusive or nasty! If he was, you’d know. 🤣

But I seriously consider Melone to be the one (at least among La Squadra) who is way, way invested in his relationships. He will know every little detail about you; will ask you lots of questions and expects you to ask him just as many. 

This may be annoying to some, but this dude will definitely bring up your horoscope in an argument. He’ll be like “I honestly can’t fathom why you’re being this way, though it’s to be expected from a libra.” 

Peg this bitch so he can shut up.  

Melone is also touchy as hell, but not in a clingy way. He loves touching, and just to tag onto the headcanon about his partial blindness, I want to say that he’s so touchy because that’s how he ‘sees’ you best.

Just know that half the time, he isn’t touching you to be lecherous, even if he genuinely does like the feel of your skin under his fingertips. Melone will even encourage you to touch him back. 

Rub his thigh or back and he’ll be simping.

He is obsessed with your legs, and will paint your toes if you let him. 

LOVES PDA! Melone will also tongue-kiss you in public if you let him!

Notice how I keep saying ‘if you let him’. Give him an inch and he’ll press you for a mile, so if there are boundaries you would like to establish, please do, cuz he sure as hell won’t, just saying!

When it comes to sex, Melone is a dick and coochie sensei. Oral is his favorite thing to do, probably enjoys giving more than receiving to be honest. I’d say he’s pretty much mastered sex for what it is. 

That being said, if he’s ever talking out of his neck, just invite him to put his mouth to better use. He’ll even thank you for your gracious request.

Formaggio is next 💀 

According to my JoJo compatriots from discord, he’s like the Optimus Prime of fuckboi’s so let’s ride that wave for a bit! LMAO

I hope it doesn’t come as a surprise that Formaggio is pretty shameless. He will send you a dick pic on Sunday morning before church and have the audacity to say “Just wanted to bless you real quick”. 

@autumn-kouhai mentioned him giving his s/o sickly sweet pet names and I just have to agree. 

Expect to be hit upside the head with: baby-boo, sugar plum, honey bunches, sweetums. I can imagine them becoming really ridiculous too like “the last piece of red velvet cake” or “cheddar bae biscuits from Red Lobster”

His catch phrase is “Got nudes?”

Send them, and he won’t be afraid to reply with something equally sexy. 

Be warned though, he will stockpile whatever you send him and then be careless with his phone. If you don’t mind Illuso’s snoopy ass seeing your nudes then by all means, have at it. Otherwise, send them through snapchat, so they disappear later. 

As far as La Squadra boyfriends go, he’s the most fun! Y’all don’t even go anywhere because man’s is broke. BUT, Formaggio knows how to have a good time without any need to spend money (my kind of dude tbh) you guys just crank up the tunes, dance, and get lit until the neighbors complain. 

Formi is also the CEO of jokes/memes, and will have you in absolute tears almost always! I literally tell my friends that funny guys are so dangerous, don’t sleep on them! They will make you laugh until your panties drop, it’s magic, I swear. Formaggio has that same energy. 

No matter how bad of a day his s/o is having, rest assured, he will draw the biggest laugh out of you.

Besides his fuckboi tendencies, his most redeeming quality is the fact that he’s super cool and fun to hang with. You’ll literally have a good time, always, because his energy is right! Very good vibes around this man, I swear! It’ll be exactly like dating your best friend, because essentially, he will be your bestie.

Formi has many moments of tenderness that aren’t sexually charged too—moments where the jokes stop and he’ll just rub your back or feet, this is usually when you aren’t feeling well and need some quiet. 

However, Formaggio won’t let you mope all day, he’ll pull out the big guns and call you his “sweetie baby” and when you try to resist he’ll say “What, I’m just tryna show you some love.”

He’s a good dude lmao I’d date a guy like him irl 😭

Pesci stans wya??! Let’s get into this baby boy. 

Pesci is boyfriend material, idgaf what anyone says. 

He is pretty much the least problematic to be with among all of La Squadra, even more so than Risotto (don’t argue with me). 

Pesci is hyper aware of your likes and dislikes and will literally go out of his way to make sure that you’re well and okay. 

Arguments are basically nonexistent and if they occur it ain’t coming from his side. 

I also think that Pesci has a lot of empathy, so when you’re going through something, he’s right there in the thick of it with you. If you’ve seen that meme that goes ‘when my gf is on her period it’s UterUS’ lmao that’s Pesci’s energy 100%. 

Sometimes, he’s more of a lover and not a fight, that is perfectly okay!

However, if someone tries up his s/o, say farewell to Mr. Niceguy. He will defend your honor to his dying breath. And with you in his corner, trust me, he’s not going down. 

A romantic at heart, Pesci will plan little date trips like picnics in the park or boat trips to Capri, actually, I’d like to point out that he excels in the art of date planning. If you’re the adventurous type, he’ll plan outings where you both will be more active, like biking through the city or renting a mop-ed and going sight-seeing. 

Because Pesci has a sensitive stomach, he’s very much considerate of what you both put in your bodies. If you have dietary restrictions or allergies, this guy knows all about it and will cater to you perfectly. 

A true gentleman through and through, he will never force himself on you, ever. In fact, he really doesn’t like engaging in anything sexual when you’re drunk or high, sorry if you’re into that! 

Pesci is the kind of guy who keeps up with your favorite shows.

If ya’ll have similar taste in media or literature, he will immerse himself in it so that he can relate to you all the more.

If there’s anyone who will entertain anime-related discourse, no matter how nonsensical, it’s Pesci. And he isn’t just putting up with it, he’s actively engaging in the conversation so you are always heard and validated. 

He’s an A+ boyfriend, that’s all I gotta say! Haters can stay mad :)

Goddamn Illuso... idk man.

I really feel like you have to have thick/tough skin to handle this guy, for various reasons. 

The first being that Illuso can be a bit mean at first. He’ll push your buttons on purpose just to see what’ll make you tick. Will tease the living heck out of you, always, kind of a bully lmao but not to the extreme, it’s just his brand of humor—and the thing is, he won’t be mad when you dish it right back, so it’s cool. 

Secondly, Illuso has big dick energy!! 

I mean rightfully so, because he is indeed packing! But my word, he ain’t humble about it at all! 

He is not above making jokes about ‘splitting you in half’. In fact all of his jokes have hidden, dirty undertones! 

His affection is shown through speech mostly. Illuso will drop subtle innuendos and provocations, half to see you flustered and half because he wants you to know how much he wants you. 

Illuso isn’t incredibly vocal about his feelings outside of ‘I’m tryna hit that thang’ but you won’t doubt that he loves you because Illuso doesn’t waste his own time. 

If he’s spending his time with you, you can rest assured that it’s because he wants to. 

Illuso is a voyeur and you’ll just have to understand/accept that and move on. 

He loves watching you and will even creep over to your place through the mirror world just to hang or watch you do chores. Loves to surprise you and give you jump scares lmao it’ll make you a tad paranoid but it’s also fun. 

Illuso is prone to random bouts of sweetness; it’s very sporadic, very touch-and-go. 

One day, you’ll wake up to chocolates on your dresser or new shoes, lingerie, or makeup if you wear it. I imagine that if you’re low on funds, he will even help you buy your groceries that week. 

It’ll surprise the hell out of you, but that’s just how Illuso is. He enjoys keeping you on your toes! 

He’s prideful and smug as hell, so he will definitely expect a thank you, because even if he does it out of the kindness in his heart, he also wants to hear that you appreciate him

Same goes for the bedroom scene. Illuso loves making you vocal, it’s his favorite thing in the world, so he’ll make a game out of doing the things that get the biggest reaction out of you. Like I said, it's that big dick energy at work here, smh.

Sorbet and Gelato in a polyamorous relationship with you? Let’s get it! 

We don’t get anything substantial about these two except that Sorbet follows the money, so these are all personal headcanons for how I see and write them. 

Here’s the juice: when it comes to you as their s/o, these two are possessive as hell. You are theirs and that’s that on that! 😭 Don’t ask questions, just go with it.

Sorbet is the chill one of the duo. He can be a bit smug at times, but he’s mostly a laid back dude who doesn’t get bothered by much.

When it comes to you, Sorbet likes to spend quality time with you more than anything, and will ask you to cook for him at your place so he ain’t gotta spend money. Oh? Did I not mention that I kinda think of him as a cheapskate? Lmao cuz I do.

Sorbet will come by your place just to steal your coupons from the mail then head out; you’re not using ‘em so why should he let them go to waste?

Gelato is the complete opposite; personality wise, I headcanon him as a mix between Melone and Formaggio lmao

But it’s not as crazy as it sounds, he’s cute and outspoken like Melone, while maintaining a free-spirit like Formaggio. One quality that I like is that he’s quite devoted to you and Sorbet. If anyone crosses either of you, goodluck to them!

I like to think Gelato’s also just really boujee and high maintenance. He loves to pamper and be pampered. You and him tag-team Sorbet’s wallet and go on spa dates together at his expense (not that he ever really stood a chance)

While Sorbet is cool with just being in the same room as you, Gelato loves hugging/cuddling with you and Sorbet—will definitely fight for the middle spot between the two of you on the couch during movie nights.

He baby, so let him have it lol

In the bedroom, I would salute anyone with the guts to take the two of them on. They both lay down that work, period. 

Sorbet gets his kicks from teasing and edging you (his sadistic side comes out a bit), while Gelato loves when you give him extra TLC. To put it short, they know how to take care of you, so there are no issues there. 

Last but not least, Mr. Risotto Nero himself.

Man, idc on the lowest of keys, he seems a little bit like a grandpa to me

The type to sit at home and do crosswords, has a bird feeder in his yard and plays old Italian hits while washing the dishes. It’s very domestic 💀 (I find it cute, whatever!)

As a boyfriend, I can’t imagine him suddenly being spontaneous or outgoing unless you drag him out of his home/comfort zone.

Be patient with Mr. Nero, and he can come to surprise you

After a while, it won’t be just you dragging him out and about; one day he’ll ask you to come over and you’ll be greeted with a nice, traditional, homemade meal

Pay attention and you will notice him watching your face to see if you like his cooking 🥺

After seeing his fight with Doppio, I must admit that Risotto is very, very observant, almost scarily so.

I can totally picture him pointing out random things about his s/o that even they don’t know

One night, Risotto may come up to you and say “I talked to your neighbor about the dog, they’ll keep it inside now.” And you’re just staring like 😳 how did he know the barking was keeping you up at night????

He’s sweet, and will take good care of you as a boyfriend should.

Very good listener, won’t talk as much but will hang on to your every word, I promise. He could even recite it to you verbatim.

He’s a big dude, that ain’t news, so expect to be swallowed up in hugs and sometimes even picked up (as a tall girl myself, I simp!!!)

Gives A1 piggyback rides, lol

ALSO RISOTTO IS HUMBLE ASF!

Big dick energy, but on low volume 👏🏾 after all, he doesn’t need to do much talking, because a night with him is more than enough!

Listen babe, you better stretch, do some squats, and prep in whatever way you can before Mr. Nero gives you that work. 🤐

Lowkey a freak, but it’s well hidden behind his ‘quiet giant’ exterior

So, who are y'all dating? Personally, I’m going for Formaggio and Pesci hehe

[dadsbongos]

Hey, Arvin?

Movie/Game/Show: The Devil All The Time Dynamic: Arvin Russell/Reader Warnings: spoilers for the movie? idk, post-ending time Summary: Self-doubt is often clouded as banter, and Arvin knows that better than anybody - especially after growing close to a certain farm girl. ~~~

Arvin didn't know he would wind up on a farm in the outskirted heart of Terrace Park. He truly did mean to sign himself to war in Cincinnati but it just never happened. A lot of things just didn't seem to work out for Arvin, so he didn't bother himself over it too much - not after everything he'd already done. Besides, his work was good and honest and the people who'd taken him in were good and honest.

Father, uncle, sons, and daughter. They were tight-knit - they had to be with the distant lands they'd been handed as a living space. No neighbors for miles, the children only had each other and the animals to play with until he came along. When the uncle came into a bar within town at sundown and convinced Arvin that being a farmhand was a good life. Now, Arvin was up before the sun with calluses burning at his hands and two young boys clinging to his boots as he went around the farm. But he can't say he hated it.

The two boys, only one year apart from each other and over ten years from him, were like little brothers to Arvin at this point. They were balls of sunshine throughout the home and if they wanted to lend a sinner like him some light, who was he to refuse?

The uncle, the man who'd found him that night, was deceptively sweet. A hulking figure with a soft heart beneath all the muscle. Deceptively smart, too. He'd gone to a life of education before coming to his brother-in-law's side at the farm. He was like a mentor and guiding hand, a kind one, a patient one. One who wanted the best for his loved ones; his nephews and niece, his brother by marriage, and for Arvin himself.

The father was largely unknown to Arvin. Gone away on matters that nobody seemed to know. Personal business. According to the boys, he used to be an involved and loving man until their mother fell ill and eventually died. And Arvin felt sickened upon that news. He felt pity for the children, he knew what it was like to be young and not understand why your mother had to go and your father was bent on going too. He could only pray that their father didn't go down the path his own had.

The daughter, their ages matching, was his favorite to spend time with. She wouldn't do her chores when the others were around, preferring to sit and watch her family as they did theirs. She would trail Arvin around the farm and talk as he worked. Sometimes she asked about what the town was like, other times she would tease him about being so quiet. Playful. Had enough heart to apologize if she ever felt that she crossed a line. He liked that about her. He liked a lot of things about her.

"Hey, Arvin?"

It was a simple phrase, one he'd heard countless times, but it was different from her. A teasing tone and a smile to match - her legs kicking out as she sat atop a stack of hay and watched Arvin brush the horses' manes.

"What is it, darlin'?"

"You ever take Arkle out for a midnight ride?"

She knew he did. She had to have. Why else would she bother with such a question?

"Just askin' since I hadn't found him out here last night. Figured he'd gotten out until I saw you out in the field with him."

Arvin pulled away from May's dirty brown mane to give the girl a quirked brow, "Why bother askin' if you already knew the answer?"

"I like seein' ya get all flustered. Thought you'd figured that out by now."

"Well, what were you doin' out here so late then?" Arvin returned to the horses as he asked.

"Just thinkin' was all."

"That right?" he spared the girl a quick glance, "What was that head a' yours so troubled with?"

She ignored his question and that didn't surprise him. She didn't like exposing her thoughts to anyone. Kept her worries and doubts to herself like they were precious gems, and with as little as this family had, they might as well have been. When you don't have much to call your own, your thoughts and feelings start to feel like little treasures. Arvin knew that first-hand and he wasn't about to steal someone's treasures by digging where he didn't belong.

"You ain't gotta tell me," he only said it to ease the tension of having been brushed over, "Just know I'm here. You follow me around all day, might as well talk to me if you need to."

The last thing he needed - or wanted - was to lose another person in his life. Especially if just talking to them could've prevented it. He knows he should've been keeping a better eye on Lenora and he hopes beyond hope she forgives him for that. He prays that her and her baby are well-cared for in heaven. If anybody deserves to be in the eternal sweetspot of God's domain, it's his dear sister.

"Hey, Arvin?"

Today, he was shucking corn, seated on a barrel, when she called to him from behind. He turned his head and nodded to let her know he was listening.

"You were awful quiet at breakfast this morning. Barely spoke to the boys at all."

"Just thinkin', darlin'. You ain't gotta worry 'bout me."

"I'll always worry 'bout you, Arvin," he feels her hands settle on his shoulders, "You came into Terrace Park alone. You got brought in by Uncle. You're around my baby brothers all the time. My boys, Arvin. My boys. We might share an age but we ain't share a brain. All I can see into your head is all I know about mine. It ain't just for you, Arvin. My daddy hasn't been the same since Mama passed and someone's gotta take care of the family. Uncle loves you to death and I don't blame him, but I'm still worryin'."

He got it. He understood. He was that way with Lenora, and he just wishes he could've done better to protect her. He wishes he could've keep his father around. He wishes his mother wasn't robbed from him so soon. He wishes he had less blood on his hands.

"Can I ease your worries at all?" he returns to his task of shucking corn.

"Where'd you get in from? Why're you here?"

"Knockemstiff. Coal Creek. Nowhere too far," he inhaled sharply as he went to begin his tale of why he left, leaving out certain unsavory details, "I had a sister. She was sweet. Lonely. I left her alone with the wrong sonofabitch," he felt anger begin boiling inside his veins as he relived that day, "she killed herself over him so I… I left. Had nothin' else there for me than makin' sure she was okay and I couldn't even do that."

"Arvin," she leans forward and presses her hands over his, "you didn't hafta tell me if it was so personal. 'M sorry I pried. Sorry about your sister, too, that's awful."

"No," he drops the corn when he realizes how shaky his hands have gotten, "I needed to get that out," he feels his heart burn the longer that her hands rest on his, "I still miss her. I shoulda been there."

Earskell should've kept tighter watch like he'd said.

Those bullies should've known better than to pick on Lenora.

Teagardin should've followed the book he read by.

"Can I hold you, Arvin?" it's barely a whisper.

He doesn't nod. If he wasn't the one to take initiative and press himself back into her chest then she wouldn't have gotten an answer at all. Her arms come around Arvin's shoulders and circle his chest tighter as his eyes water.

"It ain't your fault. It's that bastard, you know that, don't you?" she pressed her lips to his forehead and rested a cheek to the top of his head, fingers running through his hair, "It ain't your fault. Never was. Never will be."

He appreciates the sentiment even though he knows, deep down inside himself, that he'll never truly believe it. It's kind of her to care so much about a boy like him. He hopes she never has to feel the pain he knows so intimately and he hopes he can protect her brothers like he never got to with Lenora. If not to protect the softness in his own heart for them, then for the sake of a farm girl who's holding him so close as he cries in a cornfield.

"Hey, Arvin?"

It's hours past late and he hasn't been able to catch a wink of sleep. The dining table he's seated himself at is swamped in darkness and he's surprised she can even make out his figure.

"Late night, darlin'?"

"Heard you gettin' up. What're you doin' out here? I know it ain't eatin'."

"How can you tell?"

"Eatin' so late with not even a candle is just sad, Arvin. We got more to worry about than sleepin' if that's what you're doin'."

He grins at her answer and shakes his head, "Just can't sleep. You go on to bed; need your beauty rest."

It's that idea that has her feet practically cemented to the ground and her brows furrowing in her self-consciousness. She feels her gut twist at the mention of her needing beauty sleep even though she knows that's not how he meant it.

"Hey Arvin…?"

He nods before remembering she can't see him, "What is it, darlin'?"

"Do…" she presses her lips into a thin line before finally spewing out the question, "d'you think I'm pretty?"

"Well, what kind a' question is that? Wouldn't your daddy kill me for somethin' like that."

"Daddy ain't around long enough."

"I think you're plenty pretty, darlin', but don't worry 'bout what me or what any other boy has to say on your looks, you hear me? Ain't no boy in control of your body, so don't let any of 'em take anythin' from you," Arvin's quiet, voice rasped, "Nobody livin' in that body 'sides you, so you just make sure you like yourself before worryin' on what anyone else has to say."

He thought she was breathtaking, intelligent, fun - he wouldn't ramble on it for as long as he wished only because he wanted her to realize what truly mattered. She was clearly nervous in awaiting his response, if the quivers in her voice were anything to go by, and he wanted to answer this right. He wanted her to know that at the end of the day, all that mattered was her opinion on herself - because she, and she alone, was inside that body until it died. She had to love herself before someone like him had any say. Arvin's learned how to handle such situations since losing the only people he's ever cared for.

"You really think that?"

"Absolutely, darlin'," he nodded before coming to a stand and beginning to walk out of the kitchen, "You should get to bed now."

"Arvin," she reached up and took his shoulders into her hand before pressing a kiss to his cheek once she could make it out from the darkness, "you're a real sweetheart, you know that?"

"I'm just me. Ain't the best man, ain't the worst. But I appreciate the compliment," he swallowed down his nerves and kissed her forehead gently, "Sleep well, now, darlin'."

"Hey, Arvin?" she murmurs as he begins his trek back to his room.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you… for everything. I know you haven't been here the longest, but I can't imagine us without you now."

"I can't imagine me without any a' you either, so don't worry about thankin' me, darlin'."

[ultraintrovertedgryffindor]

Sweet Pandemonium - Gally (The Maze Runner) Part 2 of 16

(Not my GIF)

~~~~~~~~~~

Everything started to spiral out of control when a new Greenie came up in the Box, Thomas.

You didn’t know him, but you felt connected to him somehow. Why? You had no clue. It’s almost driving you crazy that you can’t place why you felt this way, and if you were being honest, it almost scared you.

Thomas felt this way as well. He felt that same type of connection to you. He never spoke of it for the sake of him sounding crazy, well, even more crazy than everyone else already thought him to be.

All it took was a simple glance in each other’s direction to realize you and Thomas felt the same way about each other.

“Y/N!”

Gally’s irritated tone snapped you out of your daze. “Sorry, what?”

Gally rolled his eyes. “That’s the third time you’ve dozed off today. Get it together, will ya? This shack needs to be built and I don’t feel like getting scolded by Alby because you didn’t do your part.”

You tried not to blush as the rest of the Builders looked at you with amusement, probably glad that they’re not getting yelled at for once.

Gally noticed your eyes traveling to the other Builders and huffed. “Get back to work, you shanks!”

You almost could’ve laughed at how fast they went back to work because they were pretty much scared of the boy.

“What’s up with you today, huh?” Gally asked, surprising you with his slightly softer tone.

You sighed, biting your lip in thought. “I don’t know. I guess it’s just one of those days.” You lied, partly. You truly didn’t know why you felt the way that you did, but had a feeling it was because of the new Greenie. But you didn’t need Gally to know that, especially after he’s expressed so many times about how he didn’t like Thomas.

Yeah...he didn’t need to know.

Gally raised his brow, clearly not buying her reasoning, but he decided not to push it. “Well, just, get back to work, okay?”

“For sure, Captain.” You fake saluted, a teasing smile tugging at the corners of your mouth.

Gally rolled his eyes as he shook his head, struggling to hide a smile. “Shut up. Just get building.”

You sighed as you sat down in your hammock in the Homestead, relieved to have finished that new shack for the Slicers by sundown. After that talk with Gally, you made sure to focus extra hard and you managed to do more work than you thought you were capable of.

Your muscles ached badly. You needed a shower asap.

You tried not to scream when you bumped into a Glader, realizing it was just Thomas. “Oh, hey, Greenie.” You chuckled breathlessly.

Thomas’ face visibly from relaxed to one of irritation. “I have a name, you know.”

“Right. Right. Sorry. Guess I’m just happy that I’m not the one being called that anymore.” You chuckled, clearing your throat seconds after. “I was just heading to the showers so...”

Thomas blinked rapidly, quickly moving out of your way with a slight blush dusting his face. “Uh, Y/N?” He voiced, causing you to look back up to him with a smile. You noticed Thomas’ face contorting in thought. “Uh, sorry. Never mind.”

Before you could say anything, Thomas walked off in a hurry, causing you to tilt your head in confusion. But the aching muscles in your arms and legs begging for the coldness of the shower water caused you to shrug it off quicker than you normally would.

You tossed and turned that night, which was unusual as you normally were able to fall asleep in a matter of minutes.

You felt like you woke up as soon as you fell asleep, the opening of the maze doors woke you from a less than pleasant dream. Yet again, the dream you had left your memory as soon as it appeared. The one thing attaching itself to you from the dream was a face. Thomas’ face.

You groaned as the rest of the Gladers started to get up for the day, knowing that you must’ve gotten an hour of sleep, if even that. You just accepted that it was probably going to be a shit day.

The Builders didn’t have much to do surprisingly, only needing to touch up a few things. But you absolutely didn’t mind the shorter work day, having the night that you had made it difficult to focus on anything. Even Gally’s pretty face.

Still, you didn’t want to be a useless shank. So, against your better judgement, you decided to help out Newt, Zart, and Thomas in the gardens.

You were tired as hell, but you wanted to talk to Thomas eventually, and befriending him felt like the best way to go about doing so. Plus, Newt was an absolute delight to be around.

“Eyo, Y/N.” Newt smiled, “Gally finally given ya a break?”

You laughed softly. “Nah, just a smaller work load today.”

Newt nodded. “Because you work so hard, no doubt. Things are gettin’ built a lot faster ever since you came up, love.”

You rolled your eyes playfully and grabbed a little basket to help pick off some ripe fruit. “I’m just good at following orders, if that’s something to be proud of.”

Newt chuckled. “You give about as many orders as Gally does nowadays. If anything, you seem to be partners.”

You knew Newt probably didn’t realize his phrasing, but it still made you blush nonetheless. “Gally’s an asshole.” Thomas muttered out.

You tried not to laugh loudly. “He has his moments, for sure.”

“Gally’s an alright bloke, he just has issues with change. He’ll warm up to ya eventually. He even avoided Y/N the first week and a half she got here. It’s just how he is.” Newt said.

“You seem close with him now.” Thomas said, looking at you.

You shrugged. “Uh, I’d say we’re friendly. Well, I guess my definition of friendly anyway.”

“Do us a favor, get us some more fertilizer.” Newt asked Thomas.

“Uh, sure. Where is it again?”

“Show him, will ya, Y/N?” Newt asked.

“Yeah, sure.” You nodded. “Let’s go, Greenie.”

“You really think Gally’ alright?” Thomas asked once you both got a few meters into the woods.

“Yeah, I think so. Like Newt said, he’s just scared of change. I think it’s understandable when you live in a box that you can never leave, unless you wanna get horrifically murdered by Grievers.”

“When you put it like that, then yeah. I guess change would be pretty scary.” Thomas paused, “I just, I don’t understand how you guys have been here for three years without making any progress.”

“You’re acting like it’s easy, Thomas. I’m no Runner, but I can tell how hard it is to run a changing maze every single day, having to map it, fearing for your life in the process.”

Thomas stayed silent after that, only speaking up when you both passed the Deadheads. “Who was George?” He asked.

You shrugged. “I wasn’t around when he died. He was the first one to get stung by a Griever from what Newt told me...he wasn’t too eager to talk about him anymore after that.”

“Y/N?” Thomas started, “I don’t really know how else to put this without sounding crazy but...I feel like I know you from somewhere. I know how it sound but-”

The look on you face stopped Thomas from speaking any further. You couldn’t even describe how you were feeling. Almost like relief, but fear, all meshed together in some sort of weird understanding. “You feel that way too?”

A sudden snap of a twig caused the moment between you and Thomas to end abruptly, you both twisting around to see another Glader. “Ben?” Thomas asked.

You eyed the Glader up and down, noticing how frightening he looked. Black and purple veins protruding out all over his body. His eyes red, almost bloodshot. His heavy threatening gaze on you and Thomas.

He had been stung.

You never saw how anyone looked after being stung, not really. You imagined horrible things, things more horrible than how Ben looked now. But seeing him like that disturbed you to no end.

“Ben...” You said slowly. “Are you okay?”

Ben grunted in response, looking in between you and Thomas like he couldn’t decide who to look at. “You did this.” He whispered harshly.

You brows furrowed in confusion. “What? What do you mean?”

“You did this.” Ben raised his voice. “I saw you. Both of you! This is your fault!”

You gasped when Ben suddenly charged at you and Thomas. All the breath being knocked out of your lungs when he body slammed you into the ground.

You and Ben struggled on the floor, him quickly gaining the upper hand and placing his hands firmly on you throat. “Get off her, man!” Thomas yelled, tackling Ben off of your smaller body.

You coughed violently, gasping for oxygen as the pressure on your windpipe finally disappeared as Thomas saved you from being choked to death.

You looked around to see Thomas hit the infected Glader with an animal skull just in time, him quickly pushing a now disoriented Ben off of him and soon helping you to your feet. “Go, go!” Thomas yelled in your ear.

You didn’t have to be told twice.

You and Thomas took off in a sprint, adrenaline pumping through your veins as you feared of being caught by the fellow Glade member. The confusion taking a hold of your mind as you ran, still having no idea why Ben seemed so hateful towards you and Thomas.

Thankfully, you didn’t have to think about it anymore. Ben ultimately catching up to you both due to his Runner status and tackling you and Thomas down a hill.

You groaned in pain, feeling your body topple over and landing on your arm painfully.

Thomas, yet again, helped you get to your feet, making sure you didn’t get left behind. You yelped in pain as he grabbed your now aching arm, pulling you along as he yelled for help as loud as he could.

You almost felt relieved when you saw the Gladers running to your aid, but it was short lived.

Ben grabbed your bad arm and pulled you back, making you fall on your back, but he still went after Thomas first. “Hey!” Newt’s voice filled the air, then a sickening thump, Ben immediately falling to the ground.

Newt quickly ordered the Gladers to hold down the struggling boy, Thomas quickly rushing over to you. “Oh shit, are you okay?”

You nodded, sitting up with a painful groan. You looked down at your arm to see it bruised and bloody, short jagged cuts deep in her skin.

Ben screamed bloody murder over and over again, so loud and animalistic that it even your throat hurt, even though it already hurt from being choked before.

After being taken to the other Med-jacks, it didn’t take for Gally to barge into the room, an almost angry look on his face. “How’s Ben?” You asked.

Gally could’ve scoffed at the question. Obviously Ben wasn’t okay, but you asking about him first was the reason he could’ve thrown a fit. He had seen you at the scene, wanting so badly to go to your aid first, but he needed to help the Gladers get Ben to the Pit. “Seriously? How are you? You were hurt.”

“She’s fine.” Jeff answered for you. “A sprain, and some marks from Ben’s nails.”

Gally would’ve sighed in relief, if Thomas wasn’t there too. “Why were you even with that shank anyway?” He asked, acting like Thomas wasn’t even there.

“What? Just because you don’t like him, that means I can’t hang out with him?” You sassed.

Gally glared at you and Thomas. “Ben’s gonna get banished at sundown. Do me a favor and stay away until it’s over.”

You rolled your eyes as Gally exited the room, trying not to cry at the thought of a Glader getting sent to their death. “What, banished?” Thomas asked you.

You closed your eyes with a heavy sigh. “You know there’s cure for getting stung...it would be too dangerous to keep him here.”

Thomas quickly left the room, probably leaving to see what was going to happen to poor Ben.

At first, when Gally told you to keep away from the banishment, it just made you want to go just to spite him. But you had seen a banishment before, and it was horrible. It still haunted your dreams sometimes. You really didn’t feel like reliving that again, so you listened.

That, of course, didn’t stop you from finding Gally after the fact.

“Hey...” You said softly, running up to Gally to walk with him to the wall of names.

Gally didn’t say anything, he just kept his gaze ahead of him. You knew he was hurting. Ben was his friend after all. You looked down at his hand that wasn’t carrying a torch, and your hand twitched forward, gently grabbing his large hand.

You could sense that Gally tensed at first, but he didn’t pull away. Instead, he squeezed you hand, letting you know it was okay.

“Hold this please.” Gally said, barely a whisper, handing over his torch to you.

You held the torch up as Gally reached up, placing his chisel at Ben’s name to cross his name out.

Another day, another death.

“I’m sorry, Gally.” You whispered, placing a gentle hand on his board shoulder.

Gally simply nodded, giving you a weak smile as he walked away, leaving you at the wall with only the torch as your light in the growing darkness.

~~~~~~~~~~