#i guess there's technically spoilers in here too oops

[hungrydolphin91]

typos and 3-AM-notes from my WIPs (colorized)

[callsign-rogueone]

questions

Ridoc Gamlyn x reader (sweetheart!) Part three of Ridoc and Sweetheart's story words: 2.9k 🏷: no real book spoilers, this will make more sense if you've read Resson (Garrick's version) but it's not required, set a week or two into Iron Flame, this is a sweetheart chapter so warning for intrusive / self-deprecating thoughts and anxiety spirals, I made a bunch of stuff up about Ridoc's life because RY never told us anything, Rhith being a cool mom, this hasn't been proofread, oops. gonna go have a bagel now byeeee

Rhith had told you that Ridoc would meet you at the gates at eleven — so naturally you’ve been standing there since 10:45, rocking back and forth on your heels and peeling your cuticles.

Why did you agree to do this? Actually, this was your idea — why did you bring it up? What if he’s not going to show up, and you’re just going to stand here for an hour like an idiot?

“Hey! Am I late?” he asks, startling you out of your thoughts. He’s a little out of breath, like he’d ran here, but he offers you a wide smile nonetheless.

You open your mouth to speak just as the bells chime. 

“Guess not,” he laughs when they’re done. “You ready to go?”

You nod, stuffing your hands into your pockets so he can’t see the state of your fingers. Thankfully it’s not too hot to wear your flight jacket. This is your first venture into town, and you don’t want to have your relic on display when you’re in a new place — just going is scary enough.

He leads the way — of course he knows where you’re going. He probably goes out every weekend with his friends; another way you’re completely different.

“I figured we could play twenty questions,” he offers. “Get to know each other a little more. You can go first, if you want.”

You take a second to remember how to speak again. “Alright, um… do you have any hobbies?”

“Coming up with jokes is pretty time consuming.”

“And here I thought they were all completely spontaneous,” you say, shaking your head. “Do you write them all down in that fabled diary of yours?”

He laughs. “Would you believe me if I said I didn’t actually have one?”

You tilt your head to the side, considering it. “Only because I don’t see you spending your free time sitting down, writing.” 

“You wound me, sweetheart. I assure you, I’m perfectly capable of writing complete sentences.”

“I never said you weren’t. I just said that I didn’t see you doing it.”

“Fair. Tell me about your book,” he prompts. “The one you’re always carrying around.”

“That’s not a question.”

He gives you a sly smile. “Well played. I’ll rephrase, then. What’s the book about? Do you like it?”

“That’s two questions.”

He laughs, warm and full. “I can’t get anything past you, can I?”

“Three.”

“Okay, okay. The first one, then — what's it about?”

“The main character is a trained assassin who is called before the king to join a contest to become his hitman, basically. But the contestants keep getting murdered in the night by some creature that they can’t track down.  It’s part of a series, but I’ve never seen the other volumes anywhere. I like to imagine a different ending every time I read it.”

“You’ve read it more than once?”

You ignore the fact that that’s yet another question, answering it without protest. “Yeah. I know that’s dumb, but it was the book I was in the middle of when my life went to shit. It’s technically property of the library in Aretia, but it was burnt to the ground, so I never gave it back.”

Your heart beats a little faster at the mention of your hometown, and you immediately regret bringing it up, but thankfully Ridoc seems none the wiser. 

“There’s nothing dumb about it if it makes you happy.”

You’ve just stepped into the tiny restaurant when a man that you guess is the owner sees Ridoc and pulls him into a tight hug. “I was wondering when you’d bring your girlfriend!”

Your cheeks warm, but you don’t correct him — that would be too awkward.

Ridoc doesn’t correct him either. “I set up Ezra here with ice that never melts,” he explains with a smile.

“It’s been a blessing. Keeps everything fresh longer, so I don’t have to waste it. You two sit — I’ll make you something special, on the house.” He disappears into the tiny kitchen in the back, leaving the two of you alone in the nearly-empty dining room. 

Ridoc gestures to a table in the corner, away from the door, and you settle into the chair silently. You can’t help but run through Garrick’s mental checklist — your back is to the wall, and you have clear sight of the two exits. You have a knife in your right boot and one in your left sleeve — plus the blunt one laid on the table in front of you. The fork would probably do more damage, though.

“I think it’s your turn.”

“Hm? Oh. Right.” You take a moment to look at him. “Why are you here?”

He gives you a stupid grin. “Because you asked me on a date.”

You roll your eyes. “No, I mean, why Basgiath? Why the rider’s quadrant?”

“Oh, I know. I just wanted to remind you that this whole thing was your idea. But really… probably because I’m an adrenaline junkie who feels like he has to prove to the world that he’s not an idiot. And I’ve always admired the riders and their magic. We can do some pretty cool shit.” 

There’s a pause, and his voice softens as he continues. “I know you didn’t want to be here, so I probably sound super ignorant saying all that. I do think it’s fucked up that you didn’t get a choice — and the way that they handled all of it.”

“I respect your answer. It was honest.”

His turn for a question. “How do you feel about it, really, being here? Not here as in here,” he clarifies, tapping the table, “but at Basgiath.”

You look at him for a second. “Is that your question, or…”

“It can be. But if you don’t want to talk about it, we can go back to the dumb ones.”

“No, it’s fine,” you say quietly, thinking for a second. “I’ve accepted it, but that doesn’t make it any less terrifying.”

He’s quiet, giving you space to elaborate — the same way Garrick does; not prying, but silently offering to let you tell him what you’re thinking, if you want to.

“Challenges are the one thing here that doesn’t scare me, because I don’t have to think about it anymore. I know what to do if someone takes a swing at me, and I know how to disarm someone, because Garrick made me practice hundreds of times. But everything else…” 

“Is uncertain and unfamiliar, and therefore scary,” he finishes for you. 

You’re a little surprised by the gentle tone of his voice, the lack of judgment in his words. “That pretty much sums it up.”

Another pause.

“I’ve had an anxiety disorder pretty much my whole life,” you admit. “I was that kid in school that everyone thought couldn’t speak, because I never talked to anyone, except my siblings. Liam was my first real friend who was my age. He didn’t mind the quiet. We would just sit together, and he’d do his wood carvings while I read my books. That was good enough for both of us.”

“Where are they now? Your siblings, I mean.”

You’re silent for a moment, looking down at the tablecloth and the barely distinguishable pattern of flowers woven into it. 

“I know that’s two in a row for me,” he says, backpedaling. “And you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.”

“I had a brother and a sister. They were eight and ten years older than me, but they were my best friends. I think they knew that I didn’t have anyone my age, so they always let me tag along for everything until they left for Basgiath.”

“They went here?”

You nod. “As infantry. When they graduated, they joined Fen Riorson’s movement, and a few years later, they were executed along with my parents.”

“I’m so sorry,” he says softly. “I shouldn’t have asked.”

Something compels you to keep talking, to push past the awkwardness and condolences. “I don’t mind talking about them. It’s hard, but they were an important part of my life, and they deserve to be remembered. Losing them was devastating, but Garrick and my foster sister helped fill that void.”

You trace a fingernail over one of the tiny flowers. “I think… I think that’s why I kept pushing you away, and why I haven’t really made any friends here. Being marked doesn’t help, but I can never let myself get close to anyone, because everyone I’ve ever been close to has left me, one way or another.”

You can’t bring yourself to say “died” — and that wouldn’t be quite correct, either. Garrick is very much alive, last you’d heard, but he’s at least a twelve hour flight away. 

“I’m sorry,” he says softly. “I only met her twice, but she was always kind to me and everyone she met.”

It takes you a second to realize that he means your foster sister — as far as Ridoc and the rest of the school know, she’d died at Resson along with Liam and Soleil.

“She was,” you say softly. 

It feels weird speaking about her in the past tense. You know she’s not dead, that she’s safe with Brennan and the elders, but the last time you saw her, she might as well have been — she’d felt so cold, and looked so drained, unable to respond to you or even open her eyes. 

She has to be awake by now, starting to recover. She has to push through, if for no reason other than that it would absolutely shatter both you and Garrick if she didn’t. 

Ridoc exhales, choosing his next words carefully. “I really am sorry. You shouldn’t have had to go through any of that, especially so young. But for what it’s worth, which probably isn’t a lot — I think you’re handling it all incredibly well, and you’re really brave for it.”

You, handling anything well? and being brave? Yeah, right. You take a sip of water to cover the look of dry disbelief on your face, but he sees it anyway. 

“I mean it. Bravery isn’t “never being scared”, it’s “being scared but doing the scary thing anyway”, and you’ve been doing that every day for the last year — for your whole life, honestly. I think that’s admirable.”

You blink at him for a moment, surprised. 

“It’s true,” Rhith says gently. 

“Thank you,” you say softly — to both of them. “I’ve never thought about it like that before.”

He offers you a soft smile. “I think that’s enough deep questions for now. Thank you for telling me all of that, though. I’m sure it wasn’t easy.”

“It wasn’t,” you agree. “But I feel… lighter.”

“Lighter is good.”

Ezra arrives at the perfect time, holding a tray with two plates of steaming noodles and two glasses of water, placing them in front of you and making a quick exit.

Ridoc brushes a hand against his glass, and you watch the pattern of frost crawl over the edges as it chills itself near instantly. “Want me to do yours?”

You blink, realizing he’s speaking to you. “Sure. Thank you.”

He pushes the cold glass toward you, taking the other and chilling it for himself.

The question comes out before you can think. “How long did it take you to get used to the cold?”

He looks up at you, surprised. “Not long. A week, maybe. I run hot, so sometimes it’s kinda nice.”

You nod in understanding. He’d been warm to the touch when he’d wrapped his arms around you, and you’d melted right into him. That was a first. But so is this, and it seems to be going okay.

You both eat without further discussion, every minute of quiet a little more comfortable than the last. The food is good — better than anything they serve at Basgiath. 

“So, where’s home for you?” you ask after a while.

“Deaconshire,” he answers. “My dad’s still out there. It’s been just me and him for a while.”

“Not too far, then,” you comment, not wanting to draw attention to the fact that he hadn’t mentioned his mother. 

“Yeah. I’ve thought about going AWOL for an afternoon, just to see him for an hour or two. But at least the letters will arrive fast.”

“Right,” you say softly, pushing the last piece of pasta around your plate idly. 

It hadn’t really sunk in yet that you can write letters now, as a second year. You could write to Garrick, but it would be too dangerous to send anything to Aretia, with the professors reading everything to make sure there’s no classified information being spread. You might be able to write to the Duke, and hope he passes it on to the right people, but that would still be deemed suspicious. 

Maybe Bodhi could help you.

“Where’d Garrick get stationed?” he asks.

“Samara,” you answer quietly. 

He winces, knowing that’s right on the front between Navarre and Poromiel, but he recovers quickly. “He’s with Xaden, right? They’ll take care of each other.”

“Yeah.”

“They’ll be fine,” he reassures. “They were the two biggest, most intimidating dudes in fourth wing. Nobody’s going to mess with them — but if anyone’s dumb enough to try, they’ll get what’s coming to them. And they can definitely kick ass in the air, too.”

He’s right — they’ll be fine.

Probably.

“Yeah,” you say again, hoping it sounds convincing. “They can definitely hold their own.” But against wyvern… what if what happened to Deigh happens to Chradh or Sgaeyl, and there’s nothing they can do? 

You force the thought out of your head before the universe can hear it and make it come true. 

“You ready to head back?” he asks gently.

You nod in affirmation, and he gets up, finding Ezra. The owner bids him a cheerful goodbye that includes a hearty pat on the back, while you stand by the table and offer him a weak wave and a soft thank you.

The walk back to the school is quiet, only the crunching of gravel under your boots, but this time the silence isn’t as loud.

You’ve already said everything you needed to say, laid all your cards face up on the table and shown them to the other — almost all of them, you think with a little flare of guilt, but there are some things you just can’t tell anyone, for the sake of Tyrrendor in its entirety.

“This one’s mine,” you say quietly, stopping in front of your door. 

You call it yours, but it doesn’t feel that way. Just because you sleep here and your stuff is piled up in the corner, yet to be unpacked, doesn’t make it feel like yours, and doesn’t make it feel safe, despite the ward that Garrick had helped you put up before he left for Samara with Xaden.

Ridoc offers you a warm smile. “Thank you for taking a chance on me. I’d really like to see you again, if you want.”

“I’d like that too.”

He lingers, and for a moment you’re worried that he’s expecting something of you, but he remains a few steps away, his hands in his pockets.

“Thank you,” you add. “For today. And for finding me yesterday.”

“Of course, sweetheart. And next time you start to feel that way, you can have Rhith tell Aotrom to get me, okay? You shouldn’t have to deal with that alone.”

“Okay,” you say softly. 

He gives you another knee-weakening smile before he heads off, disappearing into a room that must be his — eight doors down, on the other side of the hall.

You make it inside just as the bells strike twelve thirty. The afternoon is still young.

You decide to unpack — starting by shoving the box of your sister’s things into the bottom of the armoire. You’d burned most of her stuff, to maintain the appearance that she’s actually dead, but you and Garrick had both taken some for yourselves. Malek couldn’t get mad about that, right?

You don’t know if you should worry what he thinks or not — you despise him for taking everyone away from you, but you need to remain in his good graces if you want to keep the few people you have left. But you aren’t sure how — it remains unclear what you did, or didn’t do, to deserve that. 

“It was nothing you did,” Rhith says gently, startling you. “And you didn’t deserve it.”

“Sorry,” you stammer. “I didn’t mean to project that to you.”

“We’ve talked about the apologies, sweet one,” she prods. “They’re never necessary.”

“Sor—” you stop yourself before you can finish the word. “I’ll work on that.”

She changes the subject for you. “I’m proud of what you did today. I know that was difficult for you.”

“It’s easier with him,” you say quietly. “I don’t know why, but it is.”

“Many things don’t require explanation. It is enough to simply appreciate them.” 

Spoken like a true green. “I wish I could be as logical as you,” you sigh. 

“There is value in both logic and emotion, but there is a balance to be found between them.”

You sit with the statement for a moment as you start to fold the laundry you’d shoved into a bag and dragged up the stairs when you’d moved, trying to smooth out the wrinkles to no avail.

“What do you think?” you ask. “about him, I mean.”

“I think he has a good heart. He genuinely cares for you, but it is your decision whether to trust him or not. And even if you do, there are some things that he can never know.”

“Yeah,” you say softly. “I know.”

“I’m proud of you, my girl.”

You’re a little bit proud of yourself too.

[disastercit]

well. new episode time! feels really different with what we know now, but. here's my thoughts anyways I guess

big spoiler warning because this episode is paywalled and might be paywalled forever but rooster teeth isn't even going to be around forever so idk what that means for the future of this episode. warner bros being the one who owns it seems like a bad sign.

-yeah I know the feeling (florida moment)

-"maybe he's dying?" "I'm dying..." ":D"

-max being excited about david dying feels like a very season 1 kind of joke but I laughed anyways

-holy shit air conditioning???

-i vote muppets!!!

-i also know that feeling unfortunately (the ac broke at my high school literally every week)

-"we can't afford hide and seek" DAMN

-david this competition prize feels HIGHLY unethical

-is this the same spooky cave where nikki found all those bear skeletons or is this camp and just the area in general completely overrun with spooky dangerous caves within walking distance

-HES CLAUSTROPHOBIC THIS TECHNICALLY COUNTS AS DAVID LORE

-okay I'm just gonna start filling up the qm square on my bingo card with as many trees as I can fit at this point

-however I will draw attention to the fact that quartermaster did try to steal Max's blood back in season 4. do with this connection what you will

-aw, CJ. it's on sight.

-oh hey it's throwaway side characters, at least I've got that going for my bingo

-overly detailed popsicles time!!!

-ooh I could write a million essays about the hose scene it's the cutest thing ever. I'm emotional

-did anyone have sasquatch making an actual reappearance on their bingo card

-today's "next time on" is completely unseen! and..! oh no!

-theres a lot to unpack there, we can deal with the implications of that next week

well! I only filled in one more bingo slot and I'm starting to think I was a bit too ambitious with my predictions. oops.

[gardens-of-may]

ENTRY TWO - chap. 23 to chap. 50

spoilers ahead

AAAAAAAAAAA

that was me singing opera

you wish you heard it

also i can’t stop talking in a british accent because guess is on repeat 

good lord jennifer 

😐😐😐

this book is getting BORING

caves are amazing 😑

WHY IS THERE A CHILD

is the child okay????

eughhhhhhb

fuck you child 

ugh him

I STILL DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THERES A CHILD

oop he’s fAcToTuM 

i’m sorry this book is getting more boring by the second 

*an hour later*

the boy’s a liar the boys a liar he doesn’t see ya he’s not think about blahhhh

idk

i’m also currently falling asleep rn so 😗

CHILD LABOR

I DESPISE CHILD LABOR

I HAVE CERTAIN TOPICS IM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT 

AND VHILD LABOR IS ONE OF THEM

*days later* (i wasn’t lying when i said this book is boring)

okay good consent!!!

oop he knows

i thought i was smart for knowing the french

i didn’t know bonne chance meant good luck 😑

it’s like avery is nonexistent and i HATE it

because in the main trilogy, his presence was very shown

but i keep forgetting that avery’s even here because of this shitty narration 

oh hi gray

oh my god grayson in shorts would actually scar me

oh my god

that’s evil

and she’s such a saint 

i forgot that we’re dealing with his dad

oops

technically avery didn’t kill him

so what’s so bad about putting the evidence of what he did against avery out?

i love xander i miss him sm

bonjour!

sisters 

hehehe 🤭 

that’s true tho

sav and gray are very similar 

gray also likes to deny his feelings tho

same bro 😜

nash is the best 

ily him sm 

suspicious 

oh no

was gray told abt the devils mercy thing?

i don’t really know what whom is 

LYRA

AHAHAGAHHAHS

ISVTHAT LYRA

IM GONNA SCREAM

STOP

MY ABAY

IVE BEEN IN LOVE WITH HER SINCE I HEARD OF HER AND THIS IS THE FURST TIME I MET HER

OMG

ASSHOLE 😍😍

IT IS LYRA

IM LIT DYING

NEW CRUSH

she’s so funny

that’s one way to deal with mental health 

get a lyra!

no not shorts 😭

ughhhh

i love gigi

lemonade? too sweet?

oh shit

i js realized i can only imagine gray with a british accent 

the aaron warner effect

grayson davenport hawthorne

i find it hilarious that it’s in autocorrect 

“I am so sorry that Avery girl took all of your money,” one of the others said seriously.

“And chose your brother,” another one added.

“And broke your heart!”

“But not your spirit.” The bravest of the girls reached out and laid a hand on his arm”

HAHAHAHA 

stop it’s like a fanclub

what has gotten into me?

😟😟😟

she isn’t a bitch 

her future is probably brighter than your fucking phone screens

oh yeah i forgot

gigi doesn’t know who he is

GIGI NO

GOOD LORD NO

no he is not your boyfriend or anything like that 

GIGI STOP

GIGI UGHHHH

THAT IMPLICATION ISBT 

SAVANNAH IS NIT A BITCH

gigi what cleavage?

gray’s reaction tho

NASH 😍😍

i’m in the rural rn

an ode to nash 

cupcake a palooza? 

ohhhh

WHAT

tallllll

as a 5’5 girl anything above 6’ is tall

seems ugly 

NOOOOO

FUCKING BITCH

UGHHHHHH

THAT BACKSTABBING BITCH

ARGHHHHH

USNT SHE RICH NOW?

a flashback? NOW???

TREE HOUSE YAY 

how tall was jamie at ten?

that’s so mean

yeah what about nash ?

he’s amazing 

okay gray might be perfect and xander can think outside the box but jamie is good at taking and measuring risks 

is that a skill? i don’t know 

js triggering pain and insecurities atp

wait they’re supposed to lose

ohhhh

okay so the point of the flashback is to show why he’s doing what he’s doing

wait what did he do?

ZELLA IS THE PROPRIETOR 

I BET

BET

mr. hawthorne js has a aura that is 

you know

i js read smth kinda sad and it lowk ruined the vibe 

ANYWAY

oh

i had hoped the proprietor was zella

ALREADY KNOW WHAT YOU GOT GOING ON DOWN THERE

sorry 🙂

THE HELL JAMIE

i forgot avery and jameson weren’t married 

i don’t know why i thought they were

GODDAMN JAMIE

oh shut the fuck up

this feels so wrong

WHAT

WHAT DO YOU MEAN 

brother?

ARGHHHHH

UGH

not this

where’s nash then?

AUGGHBBBBBB

EVE THAT FUCKING BITCH

what does that bitch want? 

a boyfriend? not even once she’s six feet under

WHY ARE YOU SYCH A CREEP???

“my existence?”

your existence pains everyone 

AHHHHH

i love gigi

oh shit

😳

anywayyyyyyy

LYRAAAAAAA

oh my god

hmmm

THATS SLATER???

BITCH IS UGLY AS FUCK

i love gigi 🥰

“prone to eyebrow arching, very fond of imperative sentences, blond and broody.”

how cute?

NO IT JUST GOT GOOD

WHAT TGE HELL JAMIE

WHAT HS WRING WITH YOU

i’m gonna kill you 

“oN tHe cOnTrArY-” shut the fuck up

ugh 

that’s terrifying 

i hate him

awwww i love avery tho

I HATE YOU 

WHAT

I THOUGHT THAT IT WENT 

nash > gray > jamie > xander

i think im used to leo

“privileged, prep school boy”

ughhhh

HE WON

i didn’t think he would

oh shitttttt

😣😣😣😣

i’m not describing this

good lord jameson

risk?

OM MY GSIF

oh yeah

his brothers are gonna kill him 😀

why would you purposefully do this to yourself?

that’s cute rohan, but i don’t think so

heheh 🤭 

bitch

what did you do in prague jameson? what?

no you did not 

MMMM-

oh nooooo

AGHGHBBBVBVVVVVVBHHH

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN PRAGUE???

gigi no

ajaksjjw he’s your brother you cannot date him 😭

that weirded me out even typing it

GIGI SYOP

HAHAHAHA

SAV AND GRAY NO

your imaginary girlfriend okay

(it’s me guys)

limes

our forever is limes

mhm

not like that

huh (i took a break if you couldn’t tell)

OH FRIENDLY WAY

UGHHHHH

FUCKING BASTARD

acacia is more of a mom to gray than fucking skye will ever be

good lord

UGHHH

NOW???

anw eight years ago everyone 🙂

this is so traumatic 

yay

[tsuki-sennin]

Geats~! 42 and 43! I slowly continue to get back on the ball. Things spiral ever quickly out of control. Shit's really hittin' the fan now.

Spoilers, I guess... though at this point, you know more about this than me.

-Festering parasites, Keiwa becoming truly ruthless, and a world

-Holy shit, not even an execution, this is a full-force beat down.

-Azuma...

-I think it's rather interesting that Keiwa's wish technically stays the same but his reasons for it have clearly radically changed.

-I wouldn't be surprised if Ryuga Sato's career blows up after this is all over the way Fumiya Takahashi's did.

-You're giving me absolutely

-J

-JITT????

-I thought Jitto was kinda dumb but like

-Jitt is a word the crappy (first) English localization of Azure Striker Gunvolt made up to substitute cussing.

-I can never take your ass seriously again, you steel rod wielding fuck

-Motherfucker's got a hitlist.

-Daichi's gone full Orteca.

-"It's all mine now~!"

-Oh thank god, Michinaga, you're here.

-Human memories, hoarded within the treasure room of his mind palace.

-Brain Tomatoes.

-And then there's this little demon.

-"Despair's a way better look for my oshi!"

-New Rider Forms, yippeeeeeee

-Premium Kekera! Premium Beroba!

-"...those are not Rider Forms."

-Frog Man's got hops.

-Oh shoot Command Form.

-Haven't seen that in a while.

-Y'know Buffa's kinda doing a lot better than expected.

-I mean it makes sense, Michinaga's a seasoned veteran and Beroba and Kekera did just get these forms.

-Azuma...

-"Oops. Oh well, not my problem."

-Yo there, Neon.

-Oh hi Ace. Nice of you to join us.

-"Dude, you're vibe is all off. Absolutely rancid."

-"It's called apotheosis, fox boy. Maybe if you just laid down, this'd be unnecessary."

-No justification, just an "eye for an eye".

-Hello, Samas. Guess you're enjoying your newfound promotion.

-Now comes the climax of the episode.

-A true battle of the dweebs.

-...that is nasty, even for a Reiwa Rider villain's standards.

-Now that I can compare them, the Premium Supporter forms look a lot like the

-Bujin Sword.

-They're bleaching her!

-OH?

-AN INSERT? AT A TIME LIKE THIS???

-Okay, sure!

Daichi: Kekera! What the fuck?! Help me, you piece of shit!" Kekera: You kidding!? This is exactly what I want!

-I'm convinced that if Kekera were real, he'd be the biggest Snyder-Verse dick rider.

-Daichi, I realize you're about to be as extinct as the trilobite you transformed into, but I don't think pointing fingers over things that you clearly planned meticulously is a good idea.

-"Yesssss! Kill!"

-Hello, Geats.

-Nooooo, not Negaiiiii

-Little Bro Ace... Big Sis Tsumuri...

-Oh

-She broke out!

-Somehow!

-...I won't lie though, she kills in that white hair look.

-Jitty don't play nice.

-Congratulations, Keiwa Sakurai! You brought back everybody who ever lost their lives to the Desire Grand Prix! Are you proud of yourself?

-Oh, new head molds?

-G

-Gya-Go???

-Oh man, Old Man Kousei's apparently done being a deadbeat jerkoff.

-The World of Keiwa Sakurai.

-"This is different."

-Good job! The DGP gave you exactly what you wanted! And as a cool bonus, they gave you new friends~!

-Oh Christ, a wild hog!

-For the record, in the United States we have a massive problem with invasive hog species that results in a lot of destruction of wildlife and (often) human casualty.

-"GEATS WHAT THE FUCK?"

-"Don't look at me, man! Tycoon was the one who made the wish! ...terribly!"

-I swear if Geats IX struggles against Mr. Warthog, I'm gonna shit.

-What's his name, anyway?

-"GEATS?! OH MAN!"

-Head?

-Honestly Keiwa you have nobody but yourself to blame for this one.

-"They're all dead! Again!"

-Kirito... Kirito???

-Damn, he grew up to be a real bastard.

-Guess all that digital.

-"Bad End, kid. Game over. Thanks to you, ratings have spiked thanks to our sadist fans."

-"...this isn't the kind of jailbreak I wanted."

-NEON

-Yeah, that fire extinguisher works.

-OHHHHHHHHH THAT'S AKARI'S KIDNAPPER

-He was a DGP player too?

-Desperate times call for desperate measures, I guess.

-Neon...

-You are far too good for us.

-Hello, Keiwa-kun.

-"I"m going to kill every last one of you."

-Not even a second.

-"That's my boy."

-The shogun now has his army.

-Instant green.

-...is this a game mechanic?

-"Goddessfication" sounds like an absolutely horrifying

-Sunk cost fallacy is a hell of a drug.

-"I need to fix this."

-You're pitiable, old man.

-"Good job, idiot." Michinaga's never gonna let any fan of Daichi's quiz show success live this down.

-It all amounted to absolutely nothing, huh Daichi?

-Guess this guy just had nothing better to do with his life than ruin someone else's.

-Irumi and Kousei, as cruel and selfish they were miserable.

-It's like a fuckin' Greek tragedy.

-What a terrible realization to never have until too late.

-Neon's just 100% done with all this. At this point what, if anything, would make her hate Beroba any more?

-Once upon a time, Kousei Kurama met a fox on the bridge.

-Is that Kirito's snout? Are we reusing suit parts mid episode now?

-Oh, that's... that's new.

-"I want to play your game. There's a mistake I can't even begin to make up for without your help."

-Time Fire!

-Fantasy!

-...that's Brave's Fantasy Gamer armor.

-Nice repaint at least, I like the blue and gold.

-Oh!

-He's a wizard.

-A mountain lion wizard.

-"It's rude to open fire on the show, you know."

-NA-GO RETURNS LET'S GO

-I'm constantly flip-flopping on how much I like Geats, but right now it's in the "Yeah, this is epic" zone. Might change, might not, who knows?

[crystallinearts]

AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT (regarding my ASMR content)

Hey, guys. I have some news.

(Oops, I’m typing with proper punctuation... so you know it’s serious, haha!)

I don’t know how many of you are here from my YouTube, how many of you found my YouTube through this blog, or what. But I would appreciate it if you know anyone who did follow my YouTube, lead them to this post so they know what happened.

So, as some of you may have noticed, all my video links are now broken, and you won‘t be able to watch my videos on YouTube.

This is because as of Friday, my YouTube channel, 💎Crystalline💎 ASMR Roleplay, was permanently terminated and the email address associated with it banned from creating another channel. I have a separate YouTube account on another email for watching and subscribing to things, but I won’t be posting videos there.

Click the read more for the full story and how I’ll handle everything going forward!

(Spoiler alert, though: I’m not going to stop doing ASMR, and my old ASMRs won’t be lost forever.)

Earlier in the year and late last year, I had two videos taken down because they violated YouTube’s community guidelines on sex and nudity, due to being 18+ videos of my voice acted ASMR roleplays featuring sexual content. I suppose it was my own fault; the community guidelines do say that isn’t allowed. Naively, I believed that because I saw a lot of other 18+ ASMR videos on YouTube, that it was “okay” despite technically being against the rules.

I was unaware that two videos being removed meant that was two strikes against my channel. My last video of my OC Xin featured a lot of crying and heavy breathing, so my guess is that it was misinterpreted as something sexual, and was the third strike that got my channel terminated.

Sadly, I filed an appeal, stating that I realized upon reflection that some videos might have questionable content, and that if they restored my channel, they could delete those videos and I’d be more cautious in the future... but my appeal was denied.

So, my YouTube channel is no more, and I’m not going to risk uploading my old content on a different email, because I don’t want it to get flagged and another channel be taken down. What happened on Friday threw me into a massive anxiety attack, which is obviously not good for my mental health, and it was the closest I have ever gotten to feeling suicidal.

(... Which seems silly, I suppose. But doing character ASMR roleplays has been one of the biggest things which has brought me joy over the past year or so. Feeling as if I’d lost one of my biggest sources of happiness just wasn’t pretty. I’m feeling much better now, and rest assured, there is zero chance of me ever harming myself. I’m too much of a coward and I like living too much! <3)

It’s unfortunate, but I will not be returning to YouTube.

However, bright side: I will be attempting to continue doing character ASMR roleplays on a different platform! (Or, well, a couple.)

Instead of buying a new laptop to render videos faster, I’m going to spend the money on a year subscription to SoundCloud. I prefer not to have to render videos (which can take hours and slows my computer to a crawl) when the content is completely audio-based, anyway.

All my SFW content will be uploaded to SoundCloud as audio, including that I will upload the audio of the videos which were taken down along with my whole YouTube channel. As it stands currently, SoundCloud’s guidelines prohibit NSFW content, but their guidelines did specifically mention that SFW ASMR is okay to upload. I’ll probably also upload my original music there.

As for the NSFW content, fan songs, and covers, I will be keeping that strictly here to Tumblr, in a few ways. If the audio is short enough, I’ll upload it directly to Tumblr as an audio post. If the audio file is too big, I’ll upload it to a cloud storage and create a link post to it. And, if I ever decide to do any more video content (like my crystal videos or my idea of a cosplay ASMR with the viewer helping Chara throw Asriel a birthday party), I’ll likely use cloud storage and do a link post of it as well.

All this is going to take time. I do have a SoundCloud account currently, but I need to upgrade it as well as remove my older content which is no longer relevant, allowed, or up to my standards. I’m also waiting till this Friday when I get paid to upgrade my account... even though I have enough money to upgrade, I’m trying to save as much as possible just in case emergencies come up in real life.

When I do get everything in order, I’m going to rebrand my SoundCloud. I am going to rebrand my SoundCloud to something similar to what my YouTube channel used to be, so that anyone who Googles that name will hopefully find me. I’ll make a post here when I do so, and I’ll put a link to my SoundCloud in my header once everything is ready.

It makes me feel sick to even talk about this, because I know I basically shot myself in the foot and it’s my own fault for violating the guidelines. But I also sincerely believe my last strike was Xin’s debut video, which had no sexual content at all and was probably misinterpreted.

I’ll admit, though, that I definitely screwed up. Some lessons have to be learned the hard way, I suppose. I wish I would have rethought how I did things, but I can’t go back and change the past. (If only. When one of you guys invents a time machine, that’s what I’m saving up to buy, lol!)

Once I upgrade my SoundCloud, my first order of business will be to reupload all the SFW ASMR content from my YouTube as audio tracks there. My descriptions for the old videos are lost because I typed them right to YouTube and never saved them elsewhere, but I’ll write new ones. After I do that, I’ll turn my attention to creating new content. I’ll try to fill requests that I received whilst on YouTube; I may not get all of them done, though.

Although I’m sure you guys have tried to look at my channel/videos and seen the error message that my account was terminated and why, I thought you deserved an explanation. And I wanted to wait till I was in a less emotional place before I made a post about it. Plus, I wanted everyone to know where my ASMR content will be moving, and to prepare you guys for where I’m going to go with it.

And... as selfish as it seems, and as okay as I’m feeling about going forward, I could still use support. This was something that shook me up very much; I spent most of Friday after work crying and in a very dark place because I thought I wouldn’t be able to keep doing something that means a lot to me. I have a lot of support from my best friend as well, and I do know I always have the support of my followers.

Thanks so much for reading! Hopefully, you will all be there to support me and enjoy my content as I go forward and try to sort all this out.

How did the great singer-songwriter-icon Taylor Swift put it...?

“... But I come back stronger than a 90s trend.”

[hexbugnan0]

aaa nano.

i wanna write some of the intent behind her current actions and why she acts the way she does and the reason she does the things she does but oh my goodness. major spoilers for her backstory.

if i was going to though ill just use the stuff i already have sort of revealed. spoilers for nanobreaker entry 4 im gonna explain the nano bits i put in

hollywood was a really bad time for nano. a lot of it specifically is inspired by bojack horseman and yeah. shes bojack coded herself but. a decent chunk is based off sarah lynn.

^reason for this: nano is like. super self pitying. she has spent the past 3 entries feeling sorry for herself, like a loser. and instead of doing anything abt it she just takes it out on the people around her (atm in entry 2.) it does not help that codebreaker is questioning and second guessing her though. Anyways. nano has two motivations behind voting for atm. ill only explain one of them because the other one is explained by lore later. but. 80% of it was out of anger, and just wanting to feel like she was In Control for once. she is not. shes also just super petty which brings us to

nano is like really immature. she's been sort of childish since entry 1 and shes not gonna stop doing this. this kind of ties into her issues with having responsibilities, as well as um. other parts of her backstory. ok here im going to assume you also read the secret nano comic that you get by clicking the clock.

uhh. ill talk about the conversation she has with synth in the nano intro, because thats where i put the bulk of her lore this challenge. synth convo: synth is still understandably pissed by nano abt the shit she said last challenge. which is fair. it was shortsighted and like. a Very Obvious Lie to everyone on purpose. mostly nano flailing to try and get a sense of control again even though she has no control. So to remedy this, nano apologizes and (she is actually telling the truth in this conversation)

however, um. second part of nano's personality. Shes like. incredibly manipulative with the information she chooses to disclose. she knows synth well enough at this point that disclosing this will make her seem pitiful, and yeah, that goes against her initial attempts to try and seem independent and stuff, but she knows thats a losing battle. at this point the most she can do is to try and gain peoples pity and hope theyll keep sticking with her out of it, as well as use the shitty shit that happened to her to manipulate her way out of the bad things she does (this is a cycle this happens in nano backstory oops)

Anyways she brings up codebreaker and LA next. mostly its to subtly shit talk codebreaker since codebreaker came out of that region, but also its to dump a bit of backstory. and the reason for SecretLeader and also the reason shes been out of it.

she can't take responsibility for her actions ever because shes never actually had to until (unspecified egg incident). and immediately after that she got her responsibility taken away.

im actually going to reveal nanos backstory backwards. from like. most recent all the way back to the hive. which means you guys have to look at pocketwatch first.

pocketwatch is not That complicated shes in the backstory to beat up nano and make her feel helpless enough to join a competition in the middle of nowhere. basically she is nano's (technically current) wife and was emotionally manipulative. thats. all you need to know for Now. When she goes on the spiel abt LA nano is referring to pocketwatch. so yeah take from that what you will. Okay okay so. thats the synth conversation and the bulk of pocketwatch. uhh. most of the codebreaker conversation is actually more codebreaker backstory focused but yeah LA was not good for nano gee i wonder why wow i wonder why serial monogamy why does she fall in that pattern why is she scared of people getting too close to her tune in next time for more deranged limelade lore rambles

[ladyfogg]

Another Round

Another Round

Fic Summary: You and Colin have been avoiding each other ever since the two of you were interrupted the other night. However, when Mare calls you to come to the bar to pick up Colin, you’re left with no choice but to deal with a very drunk Detective Zabel. Love Exists Masterpost. The Evans Fics Masterpost.

Fic Rating: Mature

Pairing: Colin Zabel/Female Reader

Warnings: Language, mild spoilers

All you want is a quiet evening at home.

The investigation into Erin’s death had shaken everyone to the core in Easttown, and you are no exception. In a place where everyone knows everyone, to have such a sudden and violent crime happen is enough to put the citizens on edge. You are feeling it and you sure as hell know Mare is feeling it. You’ve been doing everything in your power to be there for her and do what she needs but it’s hard since you’re not a full-blown detective. At least, not yet. You hope to be one day once you’ve had enough training and gone through all the proper channels.

For now, you’re content on being Mare’s trainee. Well, more like assistant but technically you’re a trainee. Actually, your exact title is Junior Detective but it makes you feel like you should be wearing a badge made of construction paper attached to your shirt by a safety pin. So you stick with trainee. Though that hasn’t stopped Mare from calling you ‘Junior’. Whether it’s to keep you at arm’s length or she just enjoys annoying the shit out of you, you’re not sure. You assume it’s a little of both.

Anyway, back to the quiet evening thing. You’ve been home for a few hours, settled into your tiny apartment with a slew of snacks and the latest crime docuseries on Netflix when your phone goes off.

You see it’s Mare and immediately pick up. “Hey, everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah everything’s fine.” You can barely hear her over the background nose. Tons of people are talking over each other with loud music thrown into the mix. “Sorry to call you so late but I need you to come down to the bar.”

“Do we have a lead?”

“Not exactly. It’s Zabel.”

Instantly your heart drops and you get to your feet, immediately scouring the floor for your discarded shoes. “Did something happen? Is Colin alright?”

In the background, you hear, “Heeeey, hey, Mare! Is that her? Are you calling her? Lemme talk to her.”

You hear her struggle for a moment before telling him to knock it off. “He’s fine. Just drunk as shit,” she says once she manages to get the phone back from him. “Can you come pick him up and take him home?”

“Oh, um…alright.”

“Is that a problem?”

“No. No, not at all.”

“I just figured since you two—”

“Oh we didn’t end up…we haven’t…” You stop yourself from going any further and embarrassing the both of you. “I’ll be there in five minutes.”

Ever since Mare interrupted you and Colin about to go at it in his hotel room, things have been more than a little awkward. Despite confessing how much you like each other, neither you nor he has made another move. Before it was spontaneous and a spur-of-the-moment decision, fueled by passion and excitement. By now, you have lost yourself in your own head and you get the sense he has too.

The two of you can’t even make eye contact without him quickly looking away and blushing. It’s adorable, yet incredibly frustrating to say the least. But the case is more important and you’ve been more than happy to forget about the embarrassing incident.

When you get to the bar, you’re faced with a vastly different Colin than you’re used to. The second you walk through the door, he calls your name excitedly and stumbles over, beer in hand.

“Oh my gosh you’re here,” he slurs, throwing an arm around your shoulders. “Mare! MARE! She’s here!”

“Yeah, I know, Zabel, I called her.” Mare’s face is as stoic as ever, and yet you can still see the corners of her lips twitch up into an amused smile.

“You wanna shot?” he asks you. “Yeah! YEAH, let’s get shots! Imma get you a shot!”

“No, Colin, I’m good,” you say but he’s already stumbling away. “Colin? Colin! Oi, whatever. How long has he been like this?”

“Since I got here,” Mare says, shoving her hands in her pockets. “Sorry, I thought you two were…I mean, the other night…”

“Nothing happened,” you say. “Since, you know, you interrupted. Things have kind of been awkward and we haven’t really talked about it.”

“Well, he’s certainly in a talkative mood tonight,” Mare says as you both watch Colin flag down the bartender and loudly ask for two shots. “Just make sure he gets back to the hotel in one piece, alright?”

“Will do, boss.”

“Thanks, junior.”

“Ugh, you know I hate it when you call me that.”

She smirks, patting you on the shoulder as she walks by. “I know.”

You make your way through the crowd to the bar where Colin is currently leaning. “Come on, Colin. I’ll take you home,” you say.

“Not before you do a shot with me!” he insists.

“Can’t, I’m driving. Besides, I think you’ve had enough.”

“Come ooooonnnn,” he slurs, nudging you with his shoulder. “Just’the one lil one? Then I’ll go…scout’s honor!”

You can’t help but chuckle, not used to seeing him so carefree and silly. After a moment of contemplation, you ease yourself onto the nearby stool. “Fine. Just the one.”

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Colin exclaims, sitting next to you. “Shottttsss!”

The bartender slides two shots over and you make a subtle motion for him to cut Colin off. He gives you a nod of acknowledgment, slyly swiping Colin’s half-full beer bottle as he moves on to take care of someone else.

“Okay, okay, okay, we need a toast,” Colin says, handing you one of the shots.

“Oh really? To what?”

“Hmmmmm…” Colin’s face scrunches adorably as he tries to get his drunk mind to think. “How ‘bout to us?”

You raise your eyebrow. “Us?”

Colin leans in close, pressing his forehead to yours, his voice dropping low. “Us. You know, me an’ you.”

“Didn’t know there was a me and you.”

“Could be. Should be. We did almost…you know.” He leans in close to your ear and loudly whispers, “Have sex.”

“Yes, yes we did almost have sex.”

“So?” he gestures with his shot, spilling some in the process. “To us?”

“To us then.”

You clink your shot glass against his before knocking the drink back, trying to hold in a cough as the liquid burns your throat. “Dear god that’s strong.”

“YUP.” Colin slams his shot glass down on the countertop, then winces when he realizes what he did. “Oops. Is’okay. S’not broken.”

“And we’d like to keep it that way,” you say, sliding the glasses off to the side. “So, what you say I take you home?”

“Wait, wait, wait, not yet. Let’s talk.” He puts his hand on your arm to stop you from standing. “We need’a talk.”

“About?”

“I’m sorry about the other night,” he apologizes, head slumping on your shoulder.

“You don’t have to apologize, Colin. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“But I did. I did. I should’a talked to you about it after but I chickened out.”

“Yeah, well, I could have talked to you too. I guess I also chickened out.”

“Here’sa thing. I jus’…you’re soooo beautiful and I get all tongue-tied around you and say stupid shit and I know you’re going to realize there’s someone better for you, and I just…”

Realizing he was way too far gone to be having such a serious conversation in the bar, you slide your arm around his waist. “Hey, hey, let’s talk about it later, okay? Come on. Let’s get you home.”

“Home’s too farrrr.”

“I meant your hotel room.”

“I don’t like it there. Take me to your place.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“I won’t try anything. Swear. I jus’…I don’t wanna go back to my empty hotel room.”

Your heart aches at the puppy-dog eyes he gives you and you find yourself relenting. “Fine. But you’re sleeping on the sofa and I’m not cleaning it up if you get sick all over yourself.”

“Thas’fair.”

You help Colin settle his tab with the bartender and then you escort him out of the bar, your arm still around his waist. His arm goes around your shoulders again but it’s mostly so he can attempt to walk straight. Eventually, you are able to load him into your car before climbing behind the wheel. The shot didn’t do much of anything and with your place being so close, you know you’re okay to drive.

Colin reclines his seat back, shutting his eyes. As you make your way towards home, you’re sure he’s fallen asleep until you hear, “Y’know, y’er really pretty.”

You smile to yourself, keeping your eyes on the road. “Thanks, Colin. I think you’re pretty too.”

“Really???”

“Yes.”

“Ugh, I’m so stupid. Should’a called you for a date the day after all that happened.”

“It’s okay.”

“NO! No is’not. I ghosted you.”

“Colin, I don’t think it’s ghosting if the other person doesn’t reach out to you either.”

“It’s not?”

“Not really. Pretty sure that just ignoring each other.”

“Oh. Okay good. Well, not good we ignored each other. Good you didn’t think I ghosted you. Cuz I would NEVER do that to you.”

“Good to know.”

“And you won’t do that to me. I know you won’t. You’re too sweet. You wouldn’t break up with me two weeks before our wedding.”

Your heart sinks when he says this. Chancing a glance at him, you notice how sad his eyes are. Truth be told, you don’t know much about Colin, mostly because with the intensity of the case, the two of you haven’t had time to properly get to know each other. But his drunk words are way too specific to be a hypothetical scenario.

“Is that what happened to you?” you ask tentatively.

“Yup. Not sure how it happened. Or why. She just woke up and said, ‘hey, I’m not in love with you anymore’. And I’m like ‘s’ok, can I put my bagel down first?’…” he babbles, head rolling to the side so he can look at you. “Jus’ like that. Done. No more.”

You reach over to take his hand. “I’m sorry, Colin. That’s…that’s really shitty.”

“Isn’t it? I mean…I don’t know wha’ happened. But…whatareyou gonna do?” He squeezes your hand and brings it up to his lips so he can place a sloppy kiss on your knuckles. “We’ve been driving for a loooong time.”

“It’s been five minutes.”

“Really?!”

“Just close your eyes. We’ll be there soon.”

“M’kay.”

Not long after, you pull into your driveaway, letting go of his hand so you can park the car and shut it off. You sit there for a minute, admiring his side profile as he lays there with his eyes closed. He is a handsome man. You can stare at him all day. Every time he greets you with that wide smile, your heart skips a beat and your stomach does a little flip-flop thing.

He must feel you staring because he opens his eyes and gives you a crooked smile. “We there yet?”

You smile back. “Yeah, we’re here. Let’s get you inside.”

“Okaaay.”

With you guiding him and doing most of the work, you help Colin up the walkway to your place, pausing now and then when he sways and puts too much weight on you. Once inside, you dump him onto the couch before going back to lock your front door. Briefly, you pause to send Mare a text letting her know you’re both safe, before shutting your phone off and tossing it onto the counter. You shrug out of your coat and shoes before rejoining Colin in the living room where you left him.

“This is a nice place,” he says, sprawled out on the couch with his head nearly hanging off the armrest. “Looks homey.”

“If by homey you mean small, then yeah. It’s real homey. Come on. Sit up so we can get your coat off.”

“Tryin’a strip me down, you saucy minx,” he slurs, leaning forward as you try to pull the long coat off his arms. “I know your game and I accept.”

Laughing softly, you manage to wrestle him out of the coat before he flops backward. “No games tonight, Zabel.”

“Fine but at least a kiss?”

“That’s definitely not a good idea.”

“Jus’a lil one…come on, lil kiss…” he says in a soft voice, trying to lean in. “Jus’a peck. Lil smooch.”

Still laughing, you gently force him to lay back down. “Not while your drunk. Maybe in the morning if you’re feeling better we can have a little smooch.”

“Been thinking about kissin’ you for days,” he admits as you start to untie his shoes for him. “And picturing you on top of me. That was nice. I liked that. Let’s do that.”

You toss him a grin as you slide the shoe off his foot. “Like I said. Maybe…If you’re a good boy.”

His smile widens and he wags his eyebrows. “I’ll be’a good boy for you.”

After ridding him of his other shoe, you tuck a blanket around him. “Sleep it off, Colin. We’ll talk in the morning.”

“Wait, wait, wait, don’t go,” he urges, grabbing your hand as you make a move to stand. “Not yet. Don’t go yet. It’s jus’…I wanna talk to you.”

“Okay. About what.”

“Everythin’. Anythin’. LIFE! Let’s talk about life.”

“It is way too late and you’re way too drunk to talk about life.”

“It’s just…the thing is…I’m getting to that age, right? I’m getting to that age where I’m starting to look at my life and I’m going…well, here’s what I thought it would be and…here’s what it actually is…” He throws his hands up with a sigh and a shrug, letting his thought hang there. 

You’re all too familiar with that feeling. And yet, you have no idea how to respond. He’s not the only one looking at his life and wondering what the hell. There you are, living in the same town where you grew up, a detective in training living in a shitty, tiny apartment with neighbors who press their noses to the window every time you set outside. You haven’t had a relationship in years, mainly because you know every single guy in town and have grown up with them. The thought of dating and settling down with any of them does not appeal to you in the slightest. Never did. Not that that’s the only way to live your life but it’s something you would like to do someday. With the right person.

“Am I making any fucking sense?” he asks, more to himself than to you.

“Yeah, yeah, you are.” You reach up to lay a hand on his cheek. “Get some rest, okay. I’ll be just in the other room if you need me.”

“Mmm, okay. Rest sounds good. Sleep good.”

He rolls onto his side, taking your hand with him and almost pulling you across his body. You manage to wiggle free with a chuckle. By the time you get up to shut off the living room light, he’s already snoring.

You have too many questions and not enough answers. This man, this big hero detective that is supposed to help solve the case seems just as lost and alone as you feel. You wonder if that’s why you were drawn together. Two lost, lonely souls who found each other among such darkness.

Too tired to go down that train of thought, you slip away to your room, wondering just how much Colin will remember in the morning.

[newbeginningsforever]

UPDATED: An Extremely Thorough Analysis of Episode 9 - Adrian’s Story

@espanholina​ asked me to rewatch the show and re-evaluate what really happened between Takka, Sumi, and Adrian. This is about the sex/non-con scenes in Episode 9. 

UPDATED: My theory here is confirmed to be correct by the director, Sam Deats. He said this in a Twitter post. 

(On a completely unprofessional and inappropriate note, doesn’t Adrian look just positively glorious in orgasm? Wow...)

**TRIGGER WARNING FOR NON-CON/SEX AND SPOILERS**

(Rewatching Season 3)

Let me preface this by saying that I am a bisexual person and I have experienced both consensual sex and non-consensual sexual situations (with men and women) in my life. I’m also the same age as Adrian would be and I have the same personality type. Okay, analysis time… 

These are my opinions about what Adrian is thinking and feeling during the controversial sexual scene:

First, let’s look at the meaning of rape in terms of deception (which is the only type of rape that might apply here): “Rape by deception is a situation in which the perpetrator obtains the victim's agreement to engage in sexual intercourse or other sex acts, but gains it by deception or false statements or actions.” To be honest, I had no idea this is technically rape until today. It means tricking someone into sex, basically, even if they want to have sex. So basically, Adrian is giving consent, but because he was deceived in order to give consent, it is a form of rape. That being rape by deception. This is very interesting. A lot of characters in TV shows are rapists then if you really think about it. For some examples: Chandler and Joey from Friends would both be rapists because they assume false identities and use fake names to sleep with women, Saul Goodman from Better Call Saul would also be a rapist because of deceptions in order to get sex, Don from Mad Men, etc. Really, if we think about the story, their deception started long before the sex scene and continued throughout because they came to murder him and just used sex as a ploy to get him in a vulnerable position. They knew Adrian is extremely lonely (and horny, oops sorry) and used that to their advantage. I think they knew Adrian would consent and that’s why they came up with the plan.

Detailed scene analysis: Adrian can’t sleep. When Takka and Sumi enter, he looks a little surprised and concerned. He asks what is wrong. Sumi and Takka conceal their blades and consecrated handcuffs behind their backs and drop them on both sides of the bed out of view of the camera. Alucard doesn’t notice. When they put their hands on his chest and say “You’ve been so alone,” he visibly blushes. I didn’t actually notice that until the second time. I rewatched this part a lot to try and gauge his emotion - in my opinion, it’s pleasant surprise and mild shock. He looks possibly hopeful and unsure about what is happening. 

When Sumi says that it’s time for his reward, Adrian’s eyes quiver and he breathes shakily, his mouth agape when they push him down onto the bed. When Sumi kisses him, and he’s shocked at first, but then he reciprocates. He’s still shocked afterward, clear by his expression and wide eyes. When Takka strokes his cheek and leans closer, Adrian actually rises up to kiss Takka. Adrian initiated the kiss with Takka and he pulls him closer right away - there is clearly (uninformed) consent and initiation at this point on Alucard’s side for Takka. I don’t understand why Adrian would actually lift himself up and initiate the kiss with Takka if he didn’t want anything sexual/romantic to happen. If someone has a different opinion about that please let me know what you are thinking.

Is it possible he simply wanted to please? I mean, that’s possible, but Takka and Sumi came into the room by saying that “it’s time for his reward”. If he didn’t want to be doing this, would he really be initiating a kiss with Takka and pulling him in close? I don’t think so. I think Adrian is definitely bisexual and I think this was his first kiss with a man (maybe with anyone). I definitely think he’s a virgin because he’s so young and so socially isolated. Throughout this scene, Alucard’s (uniformed) consent is up to interpretation because he never stops them or protests, and yet we cannot know what he is thinking at all. The expressions of ecstasy and agony/discomfort are almost the same for many people, so it’s hard to say. Also, it’s safe to say that Alucard’s not experienced with sex or with anyone being close to him, so he could be consenting and shocked/nervous at the same time. I think Adrian is so desperate for affection, sex, and love that even though he might not feel entirely comfortable, he still wants it to continue. He wants friends, he wants to be fucked and cared for like most of us do. It seems, in the next scene clip, that Adrian is holding Takka’s waist while Takka does something - not really sure what, probably gives him a handjob. Sumi takes off his nightgown and Takka gives him a kiss. Adrian’s eyes widen in response. Sumi kisses him while topless, and his eyes are still wide with his eyebrows drawn up. This could be shock or possibly discomfort, more likely shock. When Sumi comes closer, his eyes return to normal and we see him grab Sumi’s ass and pull her towards him. Then, Adrian kisses her neck and fondles her naked breast. So, he seemed shocked at first, but then definitely consenting (by manipulation of course). I think the shock here is probably because of three things: he didn’t expect this sudden three-way sex, he’s a virgin, and he didn’t think that two people would want to have sex with him. Most people think he’s a monster, after all. He pulled her closer and initiated this foreplay, so I think he did want to do this (of course, I’m not in his head, so I can’t say for sure - this is just my best guess). I think his loneliness, horniness, and affection for his new friends is trumping any discomfort. That’s my opinion based on his personality and life story.

Adrian, Takka, and Sumi are naked together. Adrian has his arm wrapped around both of them. Adrian kisses Sumi while Takka kisses his neck and gives him a handjob. Takka kisses down Adrian’s stomach down to his cock. The camera pans to Adrian’s face and he’s hard to read. He basically is blushing, but otherwise emotionless, and then he cries suddenly. (The first time I 100% thought that this was because he felt amazing, and he was so grateful and contented to finally be receiving the pleasure and affection he deserves - I still think that might be the case here) 

UPDATE: I was right, and his crying is confirmed by the director to be tears of joy.

I watched it a couple of times. It’s certianly possible that he’s uncomfortable/scared/afraid/freaked out, but I still would guess that he’s crying because it’s feeling really amazing and healing for him. Having sex for the first time (if not all the time) is very emotional for us INTJs (Adrian and my personality type) because we rarely let ourselves be vulnerable around others. We’re not used to being close or connected to other people, and we are often lonely, so sex can be totally overwhelming for us. It can also be a weapon used against us (like it is here) because we are usually so lonely and longing for affection. I think Adrian is taking what he can get. I definitely think he wants this here, but that’s up to debate.

Next clip: It looks like Takka and Sumi are taking turns going down on Adrian (giving him head). He is shaking visibly and his expression is strained. Now, I’ll be honest this doesn’t seem out of place in a sex scene, especially for the first time. (TMI= The first time someone went down on me I think I had a similar expression - it’s kinda nervewracking to be so vulnerable. Also, having two people go down on you at once? That’s got to be nervewracking, hence the shaking) Takka kisses down Adrian’s inner thigh and goes down. He seems to be rimming Adrian (licking his asshole) in the next scene, while Sumi gives him a handjob. Their expressions are starting to get progressively creepier. But Adrian is too caught up in pleasure to notice, I think. Adrian seems absolutely overwhelmed with pleasure in the next shot, breathing heavily - I think he’s about to orgasm. Takka lifts Adrian’s leg up, presumably so he can penetrate Adrian. He seems to enter Adrian in the next shot, but it’s off-screen. Sumi gets on top of him and pins down his arms, possibly having intercourse with him at this point. It’s not very clear. Anyway, they’re having sex/raping him.

Final clip: Adrian is gasping, flushed, and coming down off his orgasm. Takka nods to Sumi that it’s time to kill Adrian. Adrian looks to see what they are doing but it’s too late. It takes him a moment to understand that they’re trying to murder him. (I’m going to cry again, oh my sweet Adrian! I’m so sorry baby you didn’t deserve this at all) 

They betray him. Adrian closes his eyes so he doesn’t have to see them die. He turns away.

Adrian whispers finally, “I never lied to you.”

\\author’s side note\\ YOU ABSOLUTE ASSHOLES I HATE YOU SO MUCH YOU FUCKING BITCHES HE TRUSTED YOU AND YOU ARE RUINING HIS LIFE YOU DICKS HE DIDNT DESERVE THAT GO BURN IN HELL AND TAKE DRACULA AND LISAS PLACE YOU FUCKERS.

So, anyway, my final opinion is that Adrian is giving consent, but it is not informed consent (because Takka and Sumi are deceiving him), and therefore, it is rape. If you want the specific term it’s rape by deception. They lied about being his friends and allies, so they deceived his trust, given that their true intention was to murder him. 

{Sam Deats has confirmed this theory on Twitter. Thanks to all of you who supported me on this.}

He deserved better.

[ahwait-no-yes]

Let’s talk about if Saihara hated Ouma

So lately I’ve actually seen a bit more comments on how Saihara doesn’t actually like Ouma and people have gone as far as saying he hates him and idk why people genuinely believe it so here I am about to refute that (I’ve been waiting ages to make this post just so you know so this came out as a horribly unstructured ramble more than anything oops)

some notes beforehand:

I have an obvious bias as I do ship saiouma. although i’ll try to be neutral on what I say here, I can’t hide my bias. I have tried to include what people that hate this ship believe to counter them though, also if you ship other things that’s totally fine?? don’t think of any of this as an attack at your ship and I’m not saying Saihara loved Ouma, I’m just tired of people saying Saihara hated him.

You’re allowed to respectfully disagree as long as you don’t berate me or say I don’t know the game when the majority of the screenshots in this are from my own gameplay, lmao. 

and massive whole-game spoilers! Don’t read this if you’ve not finished DRV3!

Glad to know you made it under the cut! now I can begin with where I think people got this idea that Saihara hates him from- the infamous “You’re alone Kokichi and you always will be” line.

I admit this was very cold and still breaks my fragile saiou heart, but to base Saihara’s entire perspective of Ouma on this one line he said while he wasn’t thinking straight is just.. no.. It’s unrealistic. we’ve seen how Saihara is able to adapt his views and grow (I’ll come back to this later), he’s not stubborn in this regard like Momota or even Ouma is, so even if he did mean it 100% (which I doubt because when *anybody* is angry they will say or do things they may regret had they been calmer), it’s not like his view on Ouma from chapter 4 was his final view on him. And that’s what people fail to realise. 

So, how does Saihara view Ouma then?

well, I’d say he’s been interested in Ouma as a detective from the moment he met him with his curiosity piqued at Ouma’s claims of leading a secret organisation.

and he remains curious about Ouma throughout, always questioning why Ouma says certain things, what Ouma is lying for, he just wants to figure him out- and this doesn’t just apply to free time events either

I think you get my point there, now, I think if I didn’t ship saiou and read this, I’d argue these are all pre-chapter 5 and before the breaking line so he may have been curious before but not after- that then brings me to my next point

Saihara was confident- dare I say believed- in Ouma, especially after Chapter 5.

how bold of me to say ikr, but this ties in to Saihara’s ability to adapt his views. He’s sort of like a mixture of both Kaito and Ouma honestly, because naturally as a detective he has to be suspicious and think logically as Ouma does, while at the same time Kaito taught him to believe in his friends which has also helped him to advance in trials. I think he might have extended this belief to Ouma, because he trusts that Ouma is doing what he does for a reason.

In fact, I’d argue he’s the only one of the remaining group who wouldn’t readily accept pinning Ouma down as a villain. If anything, it’s the opposite- Saihara fought to clear Ouma’s name, and never stopped trying to understand whether or not his intentions were true or false

i’ll just drop this screenshot here (that i named THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY.png in case you were wondering)

this is what I mean when I say he wouldn’t accept it as fast as the others and would second-guess it, bear in mind this is the moment Ouma “admitted” to being the mastermind. and it’s not like this doubt was sudden or anything, cause I can recall this moment (that I actually didn’t catch on to on my first playthrough)

which gives me the idea that hadn’t Ouma purposefully messed with everyone and built up his bad reputation, it would’ve been so much easier for Saihara to disprove him being the mastermind at the point he said it. 

Anyway, going back to my point- excluding Kaito (cause Ouma directly told him), Saihara is the first to bring up Ouma’s innocence, and this is what I mean when I say Saihara believed in Ouma

note that I say believed in. believing Ouma and believing in Ouma are different, it’s like how loving someone and being in love with someone are two different things, so don’t argue that by saying “he didn’t trust him” because ik that and that’s not what I’m trying to say.

but he did believe that Ouma had his reasons, and he tried to discover and understand them. I mean, take this for example

he’s already on board lool look at him go, but no really look at the confidence

he’s both confident in himself and in Ouma not lying here, then goes back to being curious about his intentions

oh and let’s not forget who it was that searched Ouma’s lab to find clues to prove he is a remnant of despair. Why do you need to search for evidence for something you (and the others even more) think is irrefutably true? the answer is obvious- he was doubtful of it from the start, and needed evidence to convince himself it was true, but then as he found nothing to prove it (and even evidence against it), he had to convince the others of it too- and prove Ouma’s innocence

(the last screenshot was from Hikkie’s playthrough on Youtube) 

But as you can see, he’s clearing Ouma’s name as the leader of the Remnants of Despair. 

Now, I bet someone would argue that this only proves Saihara was determined to find the truth in general, because he’s mister detective, so I’ll raise you the fact that Saihara didn’t need to try figuring why Ouma does the things he does- he could leave it at just knowing the truth and if he really didn’t like Ouma like people say then there’s not much merit to it. 

“So what if I know this now? I didn’t care about him, it’s pointless” he could’ve thought something like that, but no

(I also think the “you’re lying again kokichi, there’s a method to your madness” moment fits here too)

Not only this, but there’s also how Saihara learnt from him.

honestly im still kinda mindblown from this ever since I first realised it, but when you think about it, Ouma hinted to Saihara in his FTEs how to win the game.

(those 3 screenshots are from justonegamr’s kokichi’s FTE video; random fun fact this was the playthrough that i watched while first getting into drv3)

But if you think about it, Ouma tried this again in his own trial in his attempt at ending the killing game and then Saihara also used this to actually end it

Not only that (which personally i think is pretty powerful in itself), but Saihara also tries to take Ouma seriously and picks up hints he leaves and uses them later

as well as

et

(and generally just)

generally, Ouma will hint and then Saihara will pick it up. it’s been like that for the whole game- why should Saihara give any extra thought to what Ouma hints if he dislikes him?? really, he could’ve just ignored him the same way he did at the end of chapter 4- but again, he didn’t “”hate”” Ouma enough to keep ignoring him, he considered him a friend in the end anyway.

and the end is what I’ll talk about now, too.

first- can we just acknowledge this?

he doesn’t ignore Ouma at all here. even though he didn’t trust him, he was sad to have lost him. 

Not to mention the way he thinks about lying at the end of Chapter 6. (like, please this is just-  *chefs kiss*)

IMAGINE Ouma was alive to hear him say that omg but Saihara could (and probably would) extend what he says here to Ouma himself- y’know, the ‘embodiment of lies’

by thinking about lies in a different angle instead of at face value like this, he gets a more neutral view on them rather than just thinking “they’re bad!!”, why wouldn’t he be able to do the same for Ouma? especially now that he knows Ouma was innocent and actually hated the game as much as they all did. I mean hey, even after chapter 5′s trial he sort of already thinks about lies differently

and throughout this post, I’ve tried to avoid talking about his free time events or his salmon mode ending because people always say “well they’re not canon” and to that I say not canon to the plot, yes, but still canon to the characters. so yeah, I don’t disregard any of them.

from this point onwards these all technically happen before chapter 5, so it’s not entirely relevant to my point that saihara still liked ouma even after the end of chapter 4, but it’s still something that shows he liked him beforehand at least. I mainly just wanna ramble though haha

one thing I’ve always thought was interesting was how Saihara easily lashed out at Kaito in his own free time event

and Kaito is undeniably Saihara’s best friend who he holds in high regard. If Saihara having backbone means he doesn’t like someone then damn bye bye momota have a nice trip in space

in terms of ouma and saihara though 

how about the fact that Saihara willingly sat there and played rock paper scissors (janken pon!) with Ouma 100 times?? bruh I got bored playing that with my brother after 8 rounds yesterday how would Saihara manage 100?? would you really have the patience for that when you don’t even like the person you’re playing with?

how about his third free time event too?

(from justonegamr’s kokichi fte video)

Saihara wanted to spend some time with Ouma, that’s- its literally written there I don’t know what you want from me the guy wanted a nice time with someone he supposedly doesnt like

what I love about this is how “reaching out” could be taken both literally and figuratively. Wanting to understand someone and trying to find a way to but them being too unwilling to trust anyone.. damn 😔👊 also shuuichi either wanted to handshake or hold hands, what else do you do when you reach for someone’s hand come on

oh yes and how about that he’s content with the refusal because it allowed him to figure out a small thing about Ouma? understanding that Ouma has a different way of being reached out to? mhm please think about that for a bit

that parallel in the salmon ending too...

he considered how it’ll be like with him after they get out and how he’ll learn about him, then ultimately decided when ouma reached out to him that he does want this, and even comments on the warmth of his hand... afhskfdlj

his blush when ouma mentions how his lies didn’t bore saihara was also a very cute moment

ooh and what about the love hotel???

there’s that one line “I know i’m meant to be Kokichi’s ideal in this fantasy but when he tells me he loves me I feel like he means the opposite” or something like that- i’d argue it’s because he’s cautious of Ouma for one but also am I getting something wrong here or is he talking about how he, Shuuichi, thinks Ouma doesn’t like him?  because I see people argue this is proof saihara doesn’t like ouma but all he’s really doing is just doubting ouma loves him

well in any case

WHY would he want him to stay in a love hotel of all places if he disliked him?! I know I’m just a broken record at this point but I can’t think of anything logical for it. they didnt even need to include that line in the scene at all but they did like they could’ve easily said something to do with realising where he was instead but nah. even after the event’s over, he says to himself

doesn’t he sound disappointed by it? and the fact that he even questions if it was a dream- okay  

ooh, something i’ve realised while writing this as well: it kind of seems like Saihara might not want to like him but does anyway; he quickly ‘smothered the thought’ of staying with Kokichi, didn’t want to admit that Ouma’s lies never bored him, and I also thought about how in one of Kaito’s free time events he says to himself “I shouldn’t be talking about another boy like that”- well, maybe it’s similar for how he thinks of ouma? it’s not like Saihara didn’t care for the others’ opinion on him (probably the opposite ngl if you mess up in class trials he says something along the lines of“Ah I screwed up! They probably think I’m a fraud”) and considering nobody else liked ouma (except for maybe gonta) I wouldn’t be surprised if he felt shame for liking him, thus repressing that feeling (especially around the others, there’s that part in trial 4 where he’s trying to convince kaito he isn’t siding with ouma cause he knows by doing that could damage his friendship with his bro)

I mean this is something I only thought of just now, but it could be plausible (i hope?)

One last thing- I find it incredibly funny how in chapter 2 when ouma is literally on top of saihara he doesn’t freak out or scream and everyone else in the room is also completely chill with it and unquestioning. no really they’re just standing there.. and how long was ouma even in that position for??

Now, I think that’s all. So to finish off, I’ll just say

People get the idea that saiouma is bad because some don’t realise Saihara can still like a person without idolising or putting them on a pedestal. Idk if this is gonna sound controversial or not, but I honestly do think he did exactly that to Kaito and Kaede- which doesn’t make what they have with him toxic or bad at all, I just think his view on Ouma is a lot more realistic and less clouded. Heck, if Saihara canonically liked Ouma as much as he does with the other two I don’t know if I’d ship saiouma as hard as I do (it is fun to imagine though).

If you actually read through this then.. wow? I’m surprised you got through this unstructured mess? I hope you can agree with me for some of my points at least but I’m not here to convince you or anything, this has just been on my mind for weeks now I needed to get it out somehow.

I said it at the start and i’ll say it again now too- i didn’t intend on attacking or comparing saiou to any other ships so I do apologise if I seem like it, i’m just terrible with my wording (lmk if something genuinely offended you, i’ll probably change it) but you’re free to ship whatever you like cause at the end of the day it’s just a bit of fun. that being said, I don’t want to actually argue on this so please don’t haha, i’ve contemplated just deleting this but I’ve put a lot of effort into this post even though i cant analyse for 💩

I hope you can enjoy the rest of your day!

have the kokichi gaygun as a farewell present

[elizabeth-mitchells]

I was tagged by @lilolilyr thank you so much!!! i loved your answers omg you've written a lot! <33

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 49 words posted!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

612122!

3. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. five times Deena and Sam met in secret (and one time they didn’t) aka my pride and joy, love u fear street fandom. 2. Being with you (Makes the flame burn good) i'm very proud of this one, my first fic for the old guard. 3. Extremely Uneventful Subject although i genuinely love it it only got this many kudos bc i included men lmao 4. one day at a time one of my favorites!! why didn't i write more for bly manor?? 5. Andy and Quynh One Shots 101 one shots and i'm extremely proud of that lol

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I reply most of the time. In fact, I should go reply to some today

5. What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Chapter 40: the work of loving them is worth the pain of losing them. or mortal Andy is losing her memory and i cry the entire time.

6. What’s the fic you’ve written with the happiest ending?

probably Extremely Uneventful Subject because, spoilers alert, it's all about andy regaining her immortality and being happy ever after with her wife, as it should be!

7. Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve

written?

I've only written one! (Red) Room For 8. I do think it classifies as crazy, maybe? What do ocean's 8 and the haunting of hill house have in common? this fic!! i actually really liked it and i should probably finish it oops! plus, we get lou and theo being friendly exes so that's... something

8. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

No, i don't think so?

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Hmm a little. so not really. just when the fic really calls for it. for example Don't You Know? (That I'm A Moon In Daylight) helena/dinah vampire au, for reasons. and the only touchstone of truth the marla/fran backstory!

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Uhh not that i know of! hopefully not!

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! Which i think is the coolest thing! 【翻译】Being with you (Makes the flame burn good) in Chinese!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I'm on it 👀

13. What’s your all time favorite ship?

oh the most difficult question ever!! listen, i have to say at least four! Andromaquynh or Andy/Quynh, is so especial because oh my god they're immortal that's endless potential! and i don't think i'll ever write 101 one shots for another ship! Damie or Dani/Jamie, because maybe I only have two stories written for them but the love i feel for them is way too much, they are perfect, favorite characters too. Heistwives or Debbie/Lou, objectively i also wrote a lot for ocean's 8, they are the reason i started writing fanfiction! and they've lasted me a long time. plus there's also the ot3 i love. and a bonus mention for my current favorite Sameena! of Sam/Deena, because they are the only thing in my mind at the moment, except maybe for Sarah/Hannah

14. What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Okay so I genuinely started to write a The Old Guard x Hill House AU, like I had a full chapter ready I think and I was so excited about it, spooky, angsty, emotional. but then Fear Street took over my entire life. but! I love the idea and I have a full outline so I'm sure I'll write it at some point!! hopefully before the sequel comes out lol as soon as i can look past the problematic fandom again. but! one that i really don't think i'll finish, would be a tog x ocean's 8 AU, because i didn't feel as strongly about that one, didn't have an outline, technically didn't even start to write it, probably not going to happen

15. What are your writing strengths?

i genuinely have no idea what to answer, i swear

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

uhhh i don't know? if this counts, which i think it does because it definitely affects my writing, is that i have zero discipline. and i rather die than thoroughly proofread and edit everything i write...

17. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I was going to say I don't love it but then I remembered I've done it a couple of times! I think it's nice, but when it's not overdone, just a little thing here and there. in my case, i did short sentences on one shots, which meaning can be guessed or wasn't very important to the story, so that the reader doesn't have to stop reading to look up a translation, and then at the end include the translation. it's mostly about the feeling of it, to me

18. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Ocean's 8! and it was a 30k ot3 story because apparently i'm ambitious like that. and shortly after i started writing for the haunting of hill house!

19. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t written for yet but want to?

Gunpowder Milkshake! I have an entire one shot already planned out but I haven't had the time :((( (fear street please let me live) and i have written for these fandoms/ships but not nearly enough!! so i'm also going to mention Dani/Jamie from bly manor and Dani/Grace from terminator dark fate. let's not overthink why i love so many ships that include a character named dani jgkhghk

20. What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

I have many favorites but I'm going to be completely honest here and say that it's my heart (is like a haunted house) my Andromaquynh Ghost AU!

Tagging: (if u guys want to do it/haven't done it yet) @villanelleskiss, @salzundhonig, @rupzydaisy, @moonlightandromache, @cryhardanddanceharder, @knoepfchen,

[thewhitefluffyhat]

Thoughts on Gou Episode 14

Well, Rika wasn’t having a good time this episode, but I sure was!

So here’s a collection of miscellaneous thoughts, starting from the top...

Ooishi's Rampage

Huh, guess the festival killings really were Ooishi.  So much for this theory!

On my first watch, I really wasn’t sure how to feel about this scene.  Part is that I don't feel the violent material in Gou is particularly well directed.  The over-the-top behavior and blood splatters everywhere are detracting from the horror, not adding to it. 

My second time, though, I’ve come around to it more.  Rika being 110% done with a loop is always a good watch.

Anyway, this does seem to be a similar bat used by Teppei(?) and Ooishi. My first thought was that Keiichi hallucinated Ooishi as Teppei, but... Ooishi is notably not bloodied when he arrives at the festival.  Either he was "Teppei" but Keiichi hallucinated everything about fighting back or it wasn't Ooishi-as-Teppei and Ooishi arrived on the scene later.

Satoko is covered in blood, though it could be Teppei's, Keiichi's, or even her own. Even if my Ooishi theory was wrong, I guess my Satoko theory still technically lives...?

Overall, my current theory is that Ooishi arrived on the scene at Satoko's house later, and he didn't kill Takano or Tomitake either.  Even if he wasn't struck with the bat himself, I'd expect him to have at least as much blood on him as Satoko has on her if he had killed someone with it.

(Then again, for all I know, blood splatter in Gou is the new "don't think too hard about characters getting wet from the storm" a la Umineko.)

What I'm a bit nervous of is that the big "twist" of Gou is that... there are no twists or hallucinations.  Everything did go down as pictured, there are no "Answer Arcs" because there are no mysteries to be explained.

(Honestly the thing I'd be most disappointed about was if Satoko's "you're my big brother" exchange was genuine.  That just seemed wayyy too cutesy and unearned if it wasn't faked.)

Other Things

So Rika's loop mechanics changed!  I have a lot of thoughts on this, enough that I'm working on a longer post about it.  (Edit: It’s done!) The tl;dr is that these changes are basically updating an old time loop story to be more in line with modern refinements of the trope.  Woah.

There being a Sword of Plot Magic in the ritual tools shrine didn't even make me blink, haha.  The last Rei episode and the New Years' stories in Higurashi Mei involve the club finding far sillier magic items in said shrine, this feels tame and grounded by comparison.

And besides, that sword was used to kill a demon/god in the old legends, so this new plot functionality feels like the logical conclusion of that.

Umineko Theories (Some Umineko spoilers in this section!)

My strategy of refusing to believe in the theories I like best and then being happily surprised when I'm wrong is apparently working.

As everyone has noted, looper thunderdome is looking a lot more likely now that we have a sword built for it.  And Hanyuu vanishing on Rika sure came across a lot like Bern getting left by her Game Master to fend for herself.  Especially the part about Rika now being forced to loop involuntarily even if she dies five years later - a game “where the start and goal were connected like a donut."

Also, this is more of a stretch, but... is it just me or does Rika's situation seem oddly reminiscent of the logic error Bern springs on Battler in Episode 6?

Particularly the whole "Here, I left you this dinky little tool that barely qualifies as a weapon.  If you get really desperate you can escape if you manage to kill yourself with it.  Good luck!"

Like, it's obvious that Hanyuu didn't intend that sentiment nearly as maliciously as Bern later will, but Rika kind of took it that way.  Oops?

Speaking of Rika suffering... I wanted more of it, and my did this episode deliver!

The moment when Rika goes to retrieve the Onigari, and it isn't there?  That laugh. Major props to Yukari Tamura, the broken emotion in her voice was simply exquisite.  It might even be in the running for my favorite moments of despair from both Higurashi and Madoka.

...I knew it was coming, but I was almost disappointed when she did find the sword fragment afterwards.

Where do we go from here, though?  Given that this is Season 2, is this Rika's darkest moment, before her friends pull her back up?  Obviously in the short term, yes.  In the long term, I'm hoping we get to see things go even further to hell.

[vulpiximisa]

here is a post of Why I Like Nanamaru Sanbatsu which may or may not also be a Reasons Why You Should Watch Nanamaru Sanbatsu but it’s not made with the intent of persuasion and more of me just gushing over things because this isn’t spoiler friendly

1) Niche Sport

I’m not a stranger to “Sport but it doesn’t involve Ball or Sweat”. That’s a lie, the players sweat a lot in Chihayafuru. The fact that Sasaijma (and then another character in the later chapters in the manga) refer to Karuta is a reason enough to pick up the series. Hikaru no Go was one of my earlier sports anime as well. It’s not like I was a fan of Go or Karuta either but the way the characters wholeheartedly loved what they were doing (and competitively), it made me love it as well. The same definitely goes for Quiz Bowl. While the two I listed were something I completely had no clue how the rules go, Quiz Bowl is a bit more obvious so it’s easier to get into.

(kinda hate these promo pics because there looks like so many fcking charas but really you just need to remember like 5 of them)

2) Nerdy Protag in a Sports anime

Actually coming from YowaPeda, Crunchyroll recommended this amongst other things. YowaPeda did the trope a lot better, given that you’d never associate an Otaku with Biking while a Bookworm being associated with Quiz Bowl does not seem unheard of. But the idea of a nerdy protagonist in a competitive sport was still an allure. 

And oops, I think Koshiyama is a cutie so there’s a huge bias towards that. The fact that Horie Shun who voices Enta Jinnai from Sarazanmai voices Koshiyama Shiki gave me a laugh and he actually fits his role very well. Further emphasizes his cuteness without Enta’s weird gay crush lol

3) Ishikawa Kaito

I’m not above watching anime for seiyuu reasons alone but I actually went in blind with this series and to my surprise one of my favs was in it. I’d known Kaito mostly for Kageyama Tobio first, but he’s gone through so many other roles that I enjoy (Kaki from Pokemon SM, Iida from BokuHero, Mimura Subaru from 2.43) and I’ve watched a lot of seiyuu events/radios with him so I’m just a big fan of him in general. Dunno if I should have just merged this point with the next but-

4) Mikuriya Chisato

Kaito has The Range and can do whatever role he wants (I’m most impressed by his role as Alan from BNA) but I think I have a weakness for when he’s slightly an asshole. Mikuriya gave off the generic rival trope, which he kind of is. I got some Subaru vibes from him as well. I don’t know if he’s canonically handsome, but yes I think he’s very good looking for an anime character. Plus the fact that he’s The Cool Guy but is participating in such a sport as Quiz Bowl. AND the moe gap that is his feminine sounding first name and the possibility that he might also actually be an otaku is 👌👌👌👌

My friend had tagged something with him as “Chazz Princeton with a haircut” and while Not Entirely, he is the “We are not friends, we are rivals but I interact and help you enough that we are practically friends but i will continue to deny it” and I love that trope. The way he’s so not interested in Gorls or Nonsense reminds me of Manga Manjoume, though nowhere as serious because he is not above nonsense himself.

5) Fukami Mari

The moment she was introduced, I had very low expectations for her. Of course she is the one that drags Koshiyama into the Quiz Bowl world BUT she doesn’t fall into the trope of “Female is very good at The Thing, BUT Newbie Male MC does it better than her almost immediately”. I’m so glad for that because as you go on with the series, she is very much an entire character and not just a female support cast. 

She loves Quiz Bowl but she’s not the best or even very good at it. Her childhood friend from another school (which I was 75% betting that it was going to be a male and a potential love interest) turned out to be a female friend. Instead of “cat fight”, they are still very amicable towards each other and support each other but also acknowledge each other as rivals. The fact that Yuki had only started Quiz Bowl because of Mari but liked it enough to continue on by herself, I think that’s really great. 

The anime doesn’t get to it, but she confronts her brother about why he quit Quiz Bowl and challenges him. She has her own goals and ambitions and you see her working on it. She also has her strengths and weaknesses and is a vital addition to the Buzou Quiz Team. Fukami Mari is A Good Girl and I won’t tolerate any slander towards her. The way the beginning of the series sexuallizes her via putting her and Koshiyama into generic anime situations is so uncomfortable but I’m glad they move past that later.

Also since their group isn’t technically a Club (?) Mari isn’t just Female Manager. A plus to Quiz Bowl being Co-Ed sport.

6) Quiz Questions

I like trivia. It’s a little harder to guess the questions along with the anime because you’d have to pause all the time and half the time the contestants are going to buzz in early before you hear the entire question. Unfortunately, unless you actually are a fan of random knowledge or a huge nerd, the questions might actually be hard as well. I literally only knew about 3 questions asked in the entire series and its the anime/manga related ones lol. Still, I enjoyed seeing the characters draw their conclusions and to know what each character’s strong and weak points were. (Mikuriya using Math to calculate the Day of the Week from the past was 😚👌)

7) Side Characters

The first one I’m thinking is obviously Sonohara Akira. The moment of his first appearance, I had a hunch that it wasn’t exactly as it looked. He’s a little schemer but he has his own code of ethics, so he’s not all that bad. (Also hes A Gamer, so Relatable.) The fact that he’s related to Sonohara of Asagaoka makes it all the more interesting because they're’ so different. The way everyone reacts to him is so interesting because he doesn’t take it seriously while everyone else does. My favorite interactions with him aside from the Akiba Squad are the ones with Ookura. (I actually prefer to ship them over Niina/Akira lol)

Sasajima, mysterious Quiz Master with a past related to Fukami’s brother, who used to go to the Prestigious Quiz King School. Character wise, he doesn’t seem interesting but I love his idea of what a Quiz Bowl should be. My favorite parts of a series is when they love the thing they do, and that having fun is what is the most important. Of course you have to be fairly good at the thing first to be able to enjoy yourself freely but he never brags and is a supportive senpai.

Jinko. She’s cute. That’s good enough for me lol. I guess her Electronics Thing is also pretty cool. I like seeing the Sasajimas interact.

8) Ship

Okay, well, its obvious where I fall here. I don’t remember the last time I’ve watched such a generic sport series with a one on one protag vs rival. I’m not above shipping the “obvious/main” ship, as SasuNaru and Edgewright are some of my ships. However I didn’t ship Akira/Hikaru and I don’t ship KageHina but I do ship something like Manjoume/Judai and if asked MakoHaru vs RinHaru, I’d pick the latter, so it might just be a matter of tastes and I won’t fall immediately into every “rival” ship.

So why would I ship Mikuriya/Koshiyama? Because I love it when the Cool Guy falls for the Nerd and EXTRA POINTS if the Cool Guy is also secretly a nerd too. When I mean secretly a nerd, I don’t mean Mikuriya being on quiz bowl but that he might be a closet Otaku. (ImaSaka is everything about this trope.) 

Anyway, they are the main two rivals in the series, so of course they acknowledge each other. Koshiyama took it so dramatically but in the past, nobody cared about his presence, let alone think that he’s a Threat. Mikuriya is a Hot Shot and thinks he’s better than everyone but this newb with potential beat him one time (unofficially) so he’s automatically curious. 

Even though it is Hot Blooded Competition, Mikuriya always seems to encourage and cheer Koshiyama on (in his own rival-y way of course) whenever he feels down about not being strong enough to compete with him. (When they were lining up for the Third round at Asagaoka) Even when Koshiyama lost, after Mikuriya had a huge handicap, Mikuriya tells him he’ll take him on anytime. The fact that he wants to do Quiz Bowl with (against) him, is practically Sports Anime confession. “I won’t wait for you, Git Gud” “Okay I will Git Gud so we can fight again” *Fist Bump* What are you guys doing.

It might just be the art style but there is a copious amount of blushing happening every time the two interact. Also that height difference!! Mikuriya is 172 while Koshiyama is 153, I fucking love it. 

Uhhhh that’s about it. I would like to gush more but there’s only a few chapters of the manga that’s been fan translated and it’s not even half of what’s actually out there. (I think the manga is complete by now?) There’s only one anime season of the series, and I doubt there’s going to be more so RIP me.

[magnolia-penn]

Future Vision Chapter 2

DIO? God?

Oop- sorry this took so long. It took me forever to write and I had no motivation to type it all from my notebook.

Also, brownie points to whoever finds the Avatar: The Last Airbender reference.

Warnings: Swearing (so much swearing), Spoilers (sorta), mention of death (no one important) lemme know if I missed anything

□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■□■

"31 years!" Polnareff shouted in disbelief.

"Apparently." You shrugged, already over it.

The men were flabbergasted about your current predicament. Stands were a fairly new concept and to think that there was a Stand strong enough to pull you from the future, breaking all sorts of time and space laws? You'd have to be crazy!

Yet… There you were, completely adapted to the strange situation. You were thrown almost double the amount of years you existed and all it took was a quick scream session behind a sand dune for you to calm down? 

"You seem so startled. Stands have crazy abilities. My friend, Magnolia, works alongside a mafia boss with the ability to create infinite life and make it so you can never truly reach death!" You pumped your fist in the air in excitement. "Time travel doesn't seem that far out. My Stand isn't too terribly special, especially compared to some of the other Stands I've seen, but it's pretty cool."

The group's confusion settled deeper as you went on a tangent about future Stands that your friend has described from her time working at the Speedwagon Foundation. You used words that didn't make sense, phrases they didn't understand, but your growing excitement caused them to nod along with you.

"OH! And Stands can be upgraded! Although we do-" You cut yourself off suddenly, eyes zoned out.

You didn't say anything, just stared into the endless expanse of sand and heat. It was Kakyoin who spoke up first.

"Y/n? Are you alright?"

You snapped out of your trance with a start. "I FORGOT TO FEED MY FISH SHIT SEND ME BACK!"

Your sudden outburst sent Polnareff jumping back into Mr. Joestar, your attention dragged to him as his face dropped from confusion to somber defeat.

You picked up on the nervous weight shifts and glances away. You tried to look back at the man who brought you here, only for Mr. Joestar to clear his throat, bringing the attention back to him. He fumbled with his words a bit, trying to justify the shift in attention, but he ultimately failed.

"Oh ho no, I see what's going on," You said after Mr. Joestar gave up on trying to explain. "This fuck-" a pointed finger towards the corpse behind you, "was my only ticket back to the future?"

"Well no. Technic-" You cut the older man off.

"'Uh well no'," you mocked. "Lemme guess, he would've been the easiest way?"

"Now, Miss Y/n, there is no need to be so aggressive. I'm sure we can figure everything out. Our enemy, DIO, has a lackey-" 

You cut Avdol off as well.

"DIO? God? In Italian? What kind of narcissist names their kid 'God' in Italian?"

You gave a snort before falling into a fit of mocking laughter. Your humor was short lived, though, as Jotaro finally spoke up. Or shouted I guess.

"Can you shut up? Good grief, all you do is yap! God, all you women are the same."

You stopped your laughter to stare at the teen clad in black, sizing him up. It was a tense couple of minutes, an unstoppable force and an unmovable object locked in a stubborn standoff.

After a bit, you let out a chuckle and let your head fall back to face the sky.  You watched the clouds for a second before sighing.

"You know, Joots," You catch him visibly tense from the nickname. "I see why you become a marine biologist in the future. The ocean is powerful and terrifying. It's been like that from the beginning. My friend often describes me like the ocean, although, unlike the tides, who have decided to kill you millions of years ago," You bring your hand up near your face before clenching it into a fist, shimmering from the effects of your Stand. "I still haven't made up my mind."

Jotaro's face turns sour in fear for a split second before returning to the default steely glare. You watched in amusement as his Stand began to manifest, but the hesitation you saw in the purple being's eyes told you all you needed to know.

Jotaro was, at the very least, cautious of you.

But also curious.

You managed to make full contact with Hierophant Green, something no one can do unless a Stand is initiating the contact. Kakyoin also couldn't see you, so how could it've climbed up you? Stand don't act on their own violations.

You also mentioned the future Jotaro. He becomes a marine biologist? And one famous enough to be known by teenagers? Jotaro can't even name a famous marine biologist.

He figured killing you know would be disastrous, there was still much to learn from you. Maybe you held knowledge that once came with hindsight.

"Nice to see we're in agreement." Jotaro gruffed out, allowing Star Platinum to fully dissipate.

A small smile graced your features as you extended the same hand you threatened him with.

"Well then, a truce. Until we decide to kill each other." 

Jotaro nodded and took your hand, allowing a handshake to secure your mortalities.

For now.

"MON DIEU! I THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD!" Polnareff wailed suddenly, startling the group.

Tension rolled off all of you as Avdol let out a sigh of relief. "I am quite surprised you are alive as well. Not many people can insult Jotaro and walk away intact, Y/n."

You chuckled and waved off the man's concern. "I may only have six brain cells, but I'm not stupid. He wouldn't do shit. Not without knowing what I can do."

"Is that so?" Jotaro let a small smirk slip out. It's hard not to grin when you were acting stupid.

You nodded and hummed in agreement. "I like to think I'm good at reading people."

Jotaro only scoffed and rolled his eyes, although there was an inset glimmer of amusement deep with those cerulean orbs.

"So what exactly does your Stand do?" Mr. Joestar asked the elephant in the room.

"Hmm? Oh, my Stand. Okay, so, here's the thing. My Stand is actually really weak." You confessed.

"My Stand, Chemical Romance, is only really good for getting info from people. I'm often called in to the Speedwagon Foundation to help with interrogations. My Stand allows me to talk to and understand other Stands. All those unintelligible noises your Stand makes are actually your soul trying to communicate, and Chem translates them for me. Even silent Stands or Stands with no humanoid form." You glanced at Mr. Joestar. "I can also touch and interact with them, like I did for Hierophant Green. Also, and we think this might just be a radius effect, but Stands become more sentient around me. They think for themselves."

And….. just like that you lost them. It's hard to understand  such complex Stands when all they know is Many Punch, Tasteful Nudes, French Sword, Fire Bird, and Shiny Rock.

"So… You can't actually follow through with your previous threats?" Kakyoin asked cautiously.

"Excuse you! Just who in the hell do you think you are? I am a whole ass person shaped can of whoop ass and no weak ass Stand or Death Parade wannabe looking ass is going to beat me!" You pumped your fist in the air again.

"Whew- That's the sort of can-do attitude our team needs." Mr. Joestar chuckled. "Wait, that wouldn't be a bad idea!"

"Oh ho? Does the great Joseph Joestar have an idea? Careful, Old Man, thinking can hurt ya." You joked.

"No no no no no hear me out. You need to get back to the future, we need to stop DIO from murdering everybody and taking over the world." Mr. Joestar explained. "We both have to get to Cairo for DIO! Join us! You and your Stand are really useful!"

Surprise crossed your face before slipping back to its usual cool façade.

"Nah, I was kind of digging the idea of shriveling up dead in the desert. Although~" you drawled. "I guess, if you're so desperate for my help. It would be immoral for me not to help you, you're so old, even thinking about fighting DIO is going to trigger a heart attack."

You snorted out a laugh and Mr. Joestar did chuckle a bit before you realized something.

"Sooo. Who exactly DIO? Other than some bitch who wants to take over the world." 

As quickly as a light flicking out of existence, the once humorous and airy atmosphere of the group became tense and tragic. The utter rage, disgust, and hatred for this mysterious man was palpable. Even the fun and boisterous Jean-Pierre Polnareff extruded murderous intent.

"DIO is a very bad man." Avdol broke the silence, but found himself unable to say more.

"Thanks for the life lesson, Dad," you spit sarcastically. "No. Who is he and what might he have done to sound so familiar."

"DIO is a monster that was created by greed and a lust for power. He is a vampire who ruthlessly slaughtered those who took him in when he was orphaned at the age of twelve." Mr. Joestar explained grimly. "He rejected his humanity to become something monstrous and immortal, but even now, that wasn't enough for him."

"He's notorious throughout the Speedwagon Foundation, whose founder fought him a hundred years ago. I wouldn't doubt it if his story still circulated in your years, Y/n." Avdol completed.

"All of us are here now because of DIO. Polnareff and I were under his control because of a flesh bud, Advol was almost conned into the same situation, and Jotaro's mother, Joseph's daughter, is under attack by her own Stand because it was forcibly awoken by him." Kakyoin said, then shot you a soft smile. "And I guess you as well."

"Oh yeah! Eli did mention they were looking for a girl who could strengthen DIO's Stand, so I guess he is why you're here!" Polnareff's smile returned to his face at the prospect of making a new friend who was in the same boat as them.

"Y'know, think back on it, I do vaguely remember my friend mentioning your mom, Joots." That damned nickname again. "Stand Sickness is what we call it now. That might be where I know DIO from." You shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "Anywho, now that that's settled, can we get out of the desert? I'm roasting to death."

"Oh! Of course! We have to get to the next town before nightfall anyways. To the car!" Mr. Joestar cheered.

You all piled into the three rowed vehicle. Jotaro and Polnareff sat in the way back, you and Kakyoin sat in the middle, with Mr. Joestar and Avdol occupying the front.

The road to the next town was filled with fill ins. They explained how they came together and how they defeated their foes that found them at every turn. You spoke of how the world has changed and advanced. You showed them your music and all the apps on your phone. You found that you were still connected to your home wifi at full strength, but you couldn't comment or post anything. All true contact to those in the future was cut off, but you could still consume media.

As the dust and corpse was left behind, you could feel the newly forged bonds between you and the men around you strengthen and grow, becoming more entangled and intertwined. And you felt happy about it.

[radioactivepeasant]

Statement of Radioactivepeasant, concerning episodes 7-12 of The Magnus Archives

(Under a cut, because of length and possible spoilers)

Episode 7, thoughts:

The theme really reminds me of Bedtime Stories ' end credits theme.

Oof, the trenches. And a fascinating allegory(?) for war.

Reminds me of Baltimore or, The Steadfast Tin Soldier and the Vampire by Mike Mignola.

Oh. Very big Baltimore vibes, here.

This seriously sounds exactly like something Mignola would write.

Beautiful in a very sad way.

I thought the name Joseph Rainer (Rayner?) sounded familiar, too.

Are all these stories connected? Do all these...things come from the same place, perhaps?

Gah! What does that remind me of?! That's gonna bug me all week!

Episode 8, thoughts:

Hilltop road makes me think of Hill House. Sounds ominous.

Ominous tree: definitely cursed.

Uh...dude. Why did you open the door?! There was absolutely no need for you to open that door!!

My dude. You didn't think about how weird things were until after the guy vanished with the smell of burning hair?

"All the bones are in his hands"? That's...peculiar. I know I've seen that reference in other people's posts before, so it's most likely significant. Don't know why though.

Agnes sounds...fishy. Ghost type fishy, or other creepy critter.

Oh Agnes is so very suspicious.

Oh. That's why he smelled like burnt hair. Yuck.

Oh dang, evil haunted tree.

....that weird box sounds like the same goobly pattern as the weird table in the episode with the stalker lady. Episode 3?

Oop. That box was not a very good Tupperware. Or maybe it was a very good Tupperware since the apple lasted that long.

Was the apple what held The Agnes's heart? Like the story of The Troll With No Heart In His Body?

Episode 9, thoughts:

Oop, disappeared parent trope: activate!

Um. A hand and eye pendant? Hm. Don't like that.

Hands. Eyes. This sounds like it's turning into a Running Theme.

Are all the Statements connected?

Oh heck, they're Connected, aren't they?

This is gonna turn out like Baltimore where everything is secretly caused by or a symptom of one event, right?

The hand and eye pendant seems important.

...what is the dad hunting?

I assume he's going after whatever was responsible for the mom's disappearance. Which means he'd probably know why she disappeared.

Excuse me

Excuse me-

Rayner?!

Oh no

These are connected, aren't they?!

I've just decided

I don't like Rayner.

The thing with the lights reminds me of the Critical Role Call of Cthulhu oneshot.

Y'know what, this makes me think: like, all those stories with brooding guys hunting down and killing people responsible for family members' deaths? Yeah those guys technically are serial killers, aren't they?

This series would be way creepier with sound effects accompanying the Statements. I'm kinda glad there aren't any.

SPOKE TOO SOON.

Is this Temple of Doom??

Um...so...were the mom's "friends" a cult or something?

Rayner Again.

Wait, what was the Thing? Was the cult responsible for its presence? Like, did it vanish because Robert killed the cult members?

Episode 9, addendum:

Something is important about the name Rayner.

Either there's a chain of Rayners who are All into Nasty Business, or there's one Rayner who is somehow cheating death and continuously ruining people's lives.

Anyone here ever read the book Meddling Kids by Edgar Cantero? Reminds me of that.

Episode 10, thoughts:

Wait, there's vampires?

I don't know why that surprised me. I guess they just seem mundane next to whatever eldritch abominations everyone else is seeing.

Well, we can't all be unknowable patches of living darkness or whatever, I guess.

Eww. Interesting choice in depiction of a vampire, definitely not the European variety, but nonetheless a familiar one. I wanna say the tongue thing reminds me of Indonesian folklore, but I can't say for certain.

Oh nope nope nope

Ewww

Hhhhhh no thank you!

This Herbert guy reminds me of a Lore episode with a real-life guy in like, the 80s who called himself a vampire hunter.

Oh hey, Martin! I like Martin so far. If only to spite Jon

I have no idea why.

Episode 10, addendum:

I forgot I hate vampires

I've just remembered why, everyone

Mm. Hate that.

Episode 11, thoughts:

Oh look, Gertrude. This seems portentous.

I see a lot of talk about Gertrude online that I don't understand, so clearly she's more than a poor record keeper.

These goobly black tendril things remind of of something from a videogame. Not sure which one. Resident Evil? Evil Within? I dunno. Something Markiplier played once.

I'm thinking of Junji Ito right now, not 100% sure it matches, but he has that feel sometimes.

What the heck does this remind me of??

Hm. Well this seems particularly ominous. Perhaps Jon ought to consider a change in careers.

Something is getting glooped into the Archives, or the Archivist, from somewhere.

Fear, maybe?

Died in the line of duty?!

She's an archivist! What in the heck does that mean?!

Episode 12, thoughts:

Ok, we're back. Had to take a break, still not a fan of that vampire episode.

Ah, a hospital. A classic setting for Unfortunate Goings-on. I've been in enough of 'em to be sympathetic to the setting for horror, but my childhood experiences just leave hospitals as more of a "oh not here again" thing for me.

I was gonna suggest spontaneous human combustion for this guy, but the way this series is shaping up, "spontaneous" might be the wrong word for it...

Eyes again...

Why so many eyes?

Wha-

Gerald Key?!

Or is it Gerard? Gerald or Gerard, I can't tell. Gerry.

Well, his ma did say he drew that fancy eye thing. Guess he likes the motif.

But still.

This is not a coincidence.

Either the Key family just gets into Weird Weird Stuff and multiple people have subsequent encounters, or else something Else is going on.

This is another one with Mignola vibes.

So...whatever this guy was chanting, I'm guessing it caused both the silence and the weird heat, and Gerry's burns. What, is he possessed or something?

Nurse got warped right into the Twilight Zone there for a moment.

So..."Asag brands the lightless flame"?

Huh. That's probably bad.

Those dang eyes again!

[corancoranthemagicalman]

Hannibal - Ep1 - Reaction

Okay, so this is starting because of @quartermastercandlestickmaker​ and @todorokisrose​ [yes, y’all both gettin’ tagged in the annoouncement and this one. I need to be clear on who is causing my suffering.]

I’m here in this hole now. This dark pit.

This is not a live-blogging of my watch, but I am writing this live. So, writing live posting later. If that makes sense. I’ll have one post per episode and after I’ll compile them all into a master list.

Spoilers ahead.

What a grand opening my dudes. Thrilling music. He’s got that “he fucked up” face going on. WAIT NO HE’S SHERLOCKING THE SHIT. OH COOL. NO WONDER I SAW SOOME FANART OF THEM BEING BFFS. Oh, I like this. Weird effects flex but I dig it.Ooooooooooo I was not expecting that voice. IS THIS WHERE THE “THIS IS MY DESIGN” SHIT CAME FROM WHAT THE FUCK Have I known this more than I thought.

Also low-key bitch *looks* like a psychopath no wonder what is gonna happen happens. Oh rip Mrs. Marlow ;;~;; that was a hard change bro.

I don’t wanna think about ---

BITCH THIS *IS* WHERE THE THIS IS MY DESIGN SHIT CAME FROM OH M Y G O D

Also Laurence Fishbourne god bless I love him.

It’s difficult for me to be social too, fam. LAURANCE WHY DID YOU FIX HIS GLASSES THAT WAS SO WE IR D???? Also bro same I love you, Will Graham, you funky little sociopath.

“Every girl is a candy bar” mhm okay thanks for that. Will and this sociable thing is really fucking me bro minus the serial killer obsession/profession/vibe.

Laurence Fishbourne is an amazing actor but I’m also digging the dude playing Will (srry names are my weakness so his name is Will.)

Oooooo booi. I recognize Katz from fanart she’s a popular one right. But we’re going upstairs.

I’m so worried about opening the door

Oh

Oh

Oh no

He knew

This bitch been knew

Holy shit

I like the whole thing with eye contact. I’ve seen the gif where it’s mentioned but I like how it’s subtle and not overly emphasized so far. Oh we’re flashing back again. Poor Elise. It’s a super interesting story technique using him as the killer. Also damn bitch “you unstable” you’re such a nosy bitch how were you interrupted when you were asked not to enter

Now everyone is here

Antlers promote healing mhm okay

I wanna hug him but I also don’t want to make him uncomfortable with contact. IS HE STOPPING FOR A DOG OH ,Y HO GOD. I’D DIE FOR THIS MAN. I’D DIE FOR THIS MAN. HE STOPPED FOR A DOG. HEWENT BACK FOR THE DOG OMGH THIS MAN THIS MAN IS,,,,, he adopted a fucking stray dog. This man is lovely. I love this man. This -- HE DOES IT TO MULTIPLE DOOGS OH MY GOD I WANNA MARRY HIM ANDHAVE WINSTON AND EVERYBODY AND OMOG HE’S SUCH A LOVELY STRANGE CREATURE.

Where are we now. In a dream state? OH SHIT WE ARE THAT’S A BODY AND A HEARTBEAT IN MY EAR WHAT THE FUCK ahhhh fun nightmares I love it. Oh shit the towels. Bro. There are quite a few visuals happening.

“USE THE LADIES ROOM” dafsjhg

Stop yelling at him ;;~;;

Woah  this is a lot to unpack in this scene you can see Will like slipping omg. It’ss almost unsettling him not having eye contact but like I know the reason for it and therefore it’s just impressive acting and not like unsettling of the actor to do that if that makes sense? I really am impressed by that level of commitment to not have a “look at the camera” to keep showing how he won’t look at other people.

Ooo this is one of the lady psych talkers which is like on the Graham side while the blonde one is for Hannibal, right even tho Hannibal is a brain doc. ALANA that’s her name and that might be how you spell it. She doesn’t want him out there but Laurence needs  her to be his back  up. (Oh, his name is Jack.) JACK DONT MAKE PROMISES WILL CAN AND WILL GET CLOSE.

WHAT THE FUCK  IS THIS SHOW WHAT THE HELL ARE THOSE SHADWS AND THE ANTLERS PIERCING HER OH MY GOD WHAT THE SHIT IS THIS SHOW I THOUGHT THE VISUALS I HAD SEEN IN FAN ART WAS JUST LIKE FANON  IMPOSED OMOG “SOMETHING WRONG WITH  THE MEAT” O G M OOG HE’S EATING THEM FUCK

Is this

Is this my bitch

MY BITCH MADS OH MY GOD.

I love him. He’s so unconventionally handsome. He looks like he’d kill and eat me but I’d thank him for it, yanno? Oops.

No nonsense MM handing this crying man some tissues I love it. “I hate being this neurotic” omg the mood also Hannibal’s glance to the tissue is fucking amazing??? V Subtle Acting /cries in beauty

Franklyn, the lion isn’t in the room boy (just discovered I might wanna put subtitles on but they’re not working so rip)

Frankie boy got so scared by that comment thanks, Dr. Lector.

Mhm no secretary that’s,,, suspicious,,,, “sad to see her go” mhm okay sure Jan

Oh this bitch does draw oh my god john hopkins internship and all. Laurence is impressed and Mads is “mhm are you gonna try something” sdajkfgh A LAYMAN DAMN aww he’s like “oomg you’re so amazing dr. mr. sir”

OH THEY’RE IN THE SAME ROOM HERE WE GO BBY

FUCKKK IT BEGINS

SORRY HE’S GIVING THE WHOLE DOWNLOW

“Associations come quickly-” “so do forts”

QEFJWahgrsdfdkq WHAT THE FUCK

THIS IS LITERAL THE FIRST DAMN CONVERSATION HE HAS WITH HIM. I KNEW THE CONVERSATION ABOUT EYE CONTACT WAS ONE OF THEIR FIRST, BUT THIS IS THE LITERAL FIRST WITH THE ADDED BONUS OF HE ACTUALLY MAKES E Y E C O N T A C T OOMGGG??!?!?!?!

Oh ;;~;; “YOU WONT LIKE ME WHEN I’M PSYCHOANAYLYZED” im this is very flirtatious als jack you’re like br  o

So he’s the King of Empathy. He’s,,, helping Will see his own face,,, mhm,,,,, what does that say about you, Dr. Lector?

He’s mocking where he was apologetic is this maybe noT

FJAGUDIS

SHIT THOSE ARE LUNGS

OH

“HE HAS A DAUGHTER SAME AGE” O H B O  Y THAT’S UH DADDY HAS SOME ISSUES WITH BABY LEAVING HOME

Also this is a copy cat dklafjsghjfd OH DAMN THAT SNAP BACK ABOUT DR. LECTOR FFUCKK MAN.

Also,, I  can see why this show,, caused issues,,, a man should not look handsome while eating fucking lungs.

More visions I cannot even

What does this

What the hell is this

Dr. Lector showing up at his house o h .

IS HE FEEDING HIM FUCKING LUNGS BITCH OH MY GD ON A FIRST DATE???

“God forbid we become friendly”

“I don’t find you that interesting”

This smells,,, like a ship,,, mhm,,,,

Breath will damn breath slow and use the words omg

Mhm ookay “we’re just alike” in the first bit…

Uncle Jack sees him as a fine china tea cup. That’s hilarious.

“How do you see me?” says Will.

“The mongoose I want under the house when the snakes slither by,” replies Hannibal WHILE WILL IS KEEPING EYE CONTACT.

OH MY GOD. MHM. KAY. IM OKAY. THIS IS OKAY.

So is there a reason -- “plain but pretty” hannibal gives a look -- is there a reason no official officer is accompanying them like????? They’re both not??? FBI????

Damn hannibal spilling shit everywhere.

HE’S USING A TISSUE TO PICK UP THE PHONE

TO CALL HIS DAUGHTER

MHMMMM?????????

Wait no he’s calling someone else

Who is this

OH HE’S CALLING GARRETT. OH. wait is he helping other cannibals get away. What the fuck. You can’t do that, Hannibal. Is there a fuckking cannibal union yall get together and trrade recipes.

OH NO GARRETT MURDERED HIS WIFE AND KID DIDNT HE OH NO

OH PLEASE NO

Wait we’re back to reality

This back and forth is trippy

Oh

H  N

OH  NO

FUCK YU HANNIBAL AND YOUR STUPID FUCKING CANNIBAL CLAN THIS PR WOMAN :(((((((((

I do love how this built up to Hannibal being the cannibal but it was Hobbs. NFIEGSIBFD

HOBBS NO

FUCK HIM UP WILL

(also I guess Will technically is FBI that probably helps lmao)

Oh no

O h n o

Dont whisper at him to see bitch

Oh no

Will

Will it’s

Oh no

>:((((((((((((((((((( hannibal Imma fuck you up

Will honey let someone clean your glasses. Does she survive? I hope the girl survives. The Traitor Cannibal Bitch is going with them. Mhm.

Alana tryin’ to protect him. (Does she like him? I got bad news, babe, he’s gonna fall in love with a man-eater.)

shE SURVIVED??? AND HANNIBAL IS THERE WITH HER???? OMOG??? DOES HE FEEL BAD YET YOU FUCKING BITCH YOU READ THE CANNIBAL WRONG AND HE NEARLY MURDERED HIS FAMILY wait is this chick who everyone calls their daughter oomg??? Is this her????

WHAT WAS THIS SHOW OMG WHAT WAS THIS SHOW