#i guess ill order online if i have to

[wishchthumblr]

panic (crying) at the disco (ikea rug department)

[rox-of-iu]

book depository closing down. no nice things allowed.

[phagodyke]

wanted to watch smth while I polish my boots but I forgot to put thr dryer on earlier so its on rn and the sound is making my teeth hurt 😭

[be-good-to-bugs]

cant i just catch a fucking break?

[windvexer]

Using tarot to read on magical events in your own practice: quick theory, new card meanings, and spread ideas

this post is OC based on my personal tarot practice; the examples given are hypothetical for the sake of this post.

Well-meaning guy: "If you think that event was a bad omen, why not read tarot to clarify?"

Person who learned tarot from popular online resources and introspection-focused art decks: "I drew the 6/Cups, so I guess my ward falling off the wall is about my inner child?"

Tarot meanings change and evolve over time. Historical meanings are often not the same, or even contrary to, modern meanings. (Consider, 6/Pentacles: the French present moment was misinterpreted to mean presents, gifts).

By acknowledging that many modern meanings available for tarot cards are modern interpretations for modern concerns, many of which have fuckall to do with witchcraft, we can also acknowledge that we can apply our own sets of meanings to tarot to achieve personal interpretations in pursuit of personal goals.

I call this concept symbol sets, and you can apply your own symbol sets to certain tarot readings in order to rapidly obtain information about magical events in your life.

Symbol sets can be swapped out for each reading. You can intend to operate on your "normal meanings" for a typical reading, and then intend to operate with "magical omen meanings" for another reading.

There are no such things as universal tarot card meanings; there are some traditional meanings, some historical meanings, and many modern meanings. Adjust what each card means to you to your heart's delight.

The more symbol sets I've developed and practiced with, the more versatile and accurate my tarot reading has become. Working with custom symbol sets might be the single biggest leap in my reading ability in 16 years of practice. At least, it feels that way!

Quick n' Dirty Symbol Set for Magical Omens, Appropriate for Everyday Use

1. Apply general portents to each suit which matches your magical practice.

Here is one set that could be suitable to troubleshooting potentially magic events:

Swords, or Air: Misfortune, betrayal, malefica, ill-intent, adversity, due to harmful (even if unintentional) spirit action, pointless or wasted effort. Sometimes, banishing, binding and hexes.

Wands, or Fire: A lot of power, excessive power, due to your own actions, uncontained energy, something you did was very much overdone. Sometimes, protection and empowerment.

Pentacles, or Earth: Mundane, physical and normal reasons, an everyday occurrence, mundane but natural growth and change. Sometimes, unlocking and unblocking.

Cups, or Water: Blessings, magic working as intended (even if unexpectedly), the normal course of magical events, magical growth and change. Sometimes, cleansing and purifying.

Major Arcana: Guiding spirits and gods; their behaviors, guidance, or messages.

A spirit worker might like to add an additional layer of complexity, which modifies the prior set:

Court Cards: The actions of another being, such as a practitioner, god, or spirit, whether they acted intentionally to bring about the event or not.

(Further breakdown, as an example: Swords courts are beings intentionally acting badly; Wands courts are the most important spirits of your path; Pentacles courts are mundane folk or spirits unrelated to your path; Water courts are other practitioners, or spirits related to your path without being in your "inner court.")

Interpret any card drawn within these principles. Here are a few random examples. Let's say, a money spell has failed to produce results, and we'd like to know why.

5/Cups [disappointment, failure]: This is the normal course of magical events; the spell wasn't cast well, and so nothing is happening.

9/Wands [determination, boundaries]: A lot of energy was raised, but incorrectly targeted or released; the energy is cooped up.

Judgment [judgment]: An important spirit in your path wants you to deal with what you have been avoiding, and will interfere with your magic until you face them.

Spread Ideas

"What's going on with that thing?" | 3 cards

Card 1: The source or cause

Card 2: The current state of affairs

Card 3: Suggested action

Example; the money jar doesn't work: Card 1, King/Swords: The source of failure was the person in the discord server who promised to curse you for not feeling the same way about Destiel as they did. Card 2, Page/Pentacles: The current state of affairs is that as a symptom of the curse, an unaware person or spirit is blocking the prosperity you seek. Card 3, Queen/Cups: Ask a benevolent spirit or helpful practitioner friend to assist you in unblocking the situation.

Determining responsibility | 2 cards

Card 1: Why this thing happened

Card 2: Why it didn't happen; one thing that wasn't the cause at all

Example; the ward fell off the wall: Card 1, 10/Pentacles: This happened because of random happenstance in the home; it was not a magical event. Card 2, Ace/Swords: This action was unrelated to malefica or bad spirits or things like that.

Foresight Before Acting | 4 cards

Card 1: The current state of affairs

Card 2: The outcome of your intended plan of action

Card 3: Recommended plan of action

Card 4: The outcome of the recommended plan

Example; the spirits did not seem to appear during a spirit petition spell: Card 1, 3/Wands: Sufficient energy was raised to attract the attention of spirits, but they may not have been properly called to action. Card 2, 6/Swords: Your plan to call the spirits back and re-cast the spell is a fruitless attempt at a transition into a new plan. Card 3, Empress: Communicate with your primary goddess or powerful spirit of the earth and obtain input and guidance. Card 4, Magician: This plan will result in obtaining important magical information about this type of summoning spell you are trying to achieve.

[goryhorroor]

Upcoming horror movies (some without release years) - not in order

Longlogs - FBI Agent Lee Harker is assigned to an unsolved serial killer case that takes an unexpected turn, revealing evidence of the occult. Harker discovers a personal connection to the killer and must stop him before he strikes again.

Nosferatu - A gothic tale of obsession between a haunted young woman and the terrifying vampire infatuated with her, causing untold horror in its wake.

Bermuda - Unknown details but it will be set in the mysterious patch of the Caribbean where planes and ships have gone missing over the years.

Twisters (ok thriller but imma count it because i can) - A sequel to the 1996 film about stormchasing scientists studying tornados.

Immaculate - Cecilia is warmly welcomed to the picture-perfect Italian countryside, where she is offered a new role at an illustrious convent. But it becomes clear to Cecilia that her new home harbors dark and horrifying secrets.

Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire - The film centers on the Spengler family as they return to where it all started – the iconic New York City firehouse – to team up with the original Ghostbusters, who’ve developed a top-secret research lab to take busting ghosts to the next level. But when the discovery of an ancient artifact unleashes an evil force, Ghostbusters new and old must join forces to protect their home and save the world from a second Ice Age.

Mickey's Mouse Trap - follows a group of friends who become targets of a serial killer dressed as Mickey Mouse

Imaginary - When Jessica moves back into her childhood home with her family, her youngest stepdaughter Alice develops an eerie attachment to a stuffed bear named Chauncey she finds in the basement.  Alice's games with Chauncey become increasingly sinister, and Jessica intervenes only to realize Chauncey is much more than the stuffed toy bear she believed him to be.

Skeletons in the Closet - Haunted by a malevolent spirit since childhood, a desperate mother allows herself to become possessed in order to save the life of her terminally ill daughter.

Lisa Frankenstein - love story about a misunderstood teenager and her high school crush, who happens to be a handsome corpse. After a set of playfully horrific circumstances bring him back to life, the two embark on a murderous journey to find love, happiness… and a few missing body parts along the way.

Winnie The Pooh: Blood & Honey 2 - oh yay? I guess a sequel

Adrift - It is described as a supernatural ghost story set aboard a ship. It is an adaptation of a short story by Koji Suzuki

Dustbunny - It follows a young girl who asks her neighbor to help her kill a monster under her bed after she thinks it has eaten her family.

Faces of Death -  follows a woman who discovers violent videos that recreate death scenes from movies online. 

Heretic -  two religious women who become the focus of a strange man's games. 

History of Evil - In the near future, war and corruption have plagued America and turned it into a theocratic police state. Against the oppression, ordinary citizens have formed a group called The Resistance. One such member, Alegre Dyer, breaks out of political prison and reunites with her husband Ron and daughter Daria. On the run from the militia, the family takes shelter in a remote safe house. But their journey is far from over, as the house’s dark past begins to eat away at Ron, and his earnest desire to keep his family safe is overtaken by something much more sinister.

MaXXXine - Six years after the ‘Texas Pornhouse Massacre’, Maxine is now LA-based and on a driven quest to become a star in the acting world. But things take a sinister turn when bodies once again begin to fall around her.

Dracula - A futuristic sci-fi western version of Dracula.

Apartment 7A - Prequel to the 1968 film Rosemary’s Baby.

Baghead - follows a young woman who inherits a run-down pub and discovers a dark secret within its basement. Enter Baghead - a shape-shifting creature that will let you speak to lost loved ones, but not without consequence. 

Out of Darkness - In the Old Stone Age, a disparate gang of early humans band together in search of a new land. But when they suspect a malevolent, mystical, being is hunting them down, the clan are forced to confront a danger they never envisaged.

Stopmotion - stop-motion animator by the name of Ella whose latest project might just be driving her to the brink of madness.

Late Night with the Devil - 1970s talk show host Jack Delroy on his last legs, wrung out by personal tragedy and in need of a ratings win. His plan to feature as a guest a young girl who is allegedly possessed seems like a Halloween night layup… until the cameras roll and all hell literally breaks loose.

You'll Never Find Me - An isolated man living at the back of a desolate caravan park is visited by a desperate young woman seeking shelter from a violent storm. As the savage storm worsens, these solitary souls begin to feel threatened – but who should really be afraid?

The First Omen - When a young American woman is sent to Rome to begin a life of service to the church, she encounters a darkness that causes her to question her own faith and uncovers a terrifying conspiracy that hopes to bring about the birth of evil incarnate. (this might be a prequel to the omen)

Abigail - After a group of would-be criminals kidnap the 12-year-old ballerina daughter of a powerful underworld figure, all they have to do to collect a $50 million ransom is watch the girl overnight. In an isolated mansion, the captors start to dwindle, one by one, and they discover, to their mounting horror, that they’re locked inside with no normal little girl. 

Return to Silent Hill - James, a man broken after being separated from his one true love. When a mysterious letter calls him back to Silent Hill in search of her, he finds a once-recognizable town transformed by an unknown evil. As James descends deeper into the darkness, he encounters terrifying figures both familiar and new and begins to question his own sanity as he struggles to make sense of reality and hold on long enough to save his lost love.

Infested -  invasion of venomous spiders, forcing residents of a suburban building to find a way out.

Tarot - Tarot follows a group of friends who recklessly violate the sacred rule of Tarot readings – never use someone else’s deck. In the wake of broken rules, consequences follow, this time in the form of unleashing an unspeakable evil trapped within the cursed cards. 

The Strangers Chapter 1 - a couple, have to survive the night while being terrorized by masked strangers in a remote Airbnb in Oregon

The Watchers - the film follows a young woman who becomes trapped with three strangers in a shelter deep within a forest in Ireland where the group must fight off mysterious creatures every night in order to survive. 

Never Let Go - a family who has been tormented by an evil spirit for years as their lives become more dangerous when one of the kids questions if the evil is real. 

The One - Follows character Taylor as she becomes a contestant on a reality TV dating show to find love. Taylor's experience takes a turn as she gets down to the final three and becomes terrified of not finding love (with a horror twist)

Thread: An Insidious Tale - new actors who play a husband and wife who use a spell to travel back in time to prevent their daughter's death, which has worse consequences than imagined

Weapons - The movie is about the disappearance of high school students in a small town, similar to the movie Magonlia's from 1999

A Quiet Place: Day One - New characters in New York

Alien: Romulus - takes place between the first & second movies

Beetlejuice 2 - not much is known about the plot details, but Beetlejuice will have a wife & Lydia's daughter will be in it

Speak No Evil: this is the English remake (all it really says; but it's just the 2022 movie but English?)

Smile 2 - it's a sequel but no details have been revealed

Terrifer 3 - not too many details revealed but it will take place on Christmas Eve

Wolfman - not too many details revealed but it's a new take on the werewolf tale

I Saw The TV Glow - Teenager Owen is just trying to make it through life in the suburbs when his classmate introduces him to a mysterious late-night TV show — a vision of a supernatural world beneath their own. In the pale glow of the television, Owen’s view of reality begins to crack.

Don't Move - A seasoned killer injects a grieving woman with a paralytic agent and she must run, fight and hide before her body completely shuts down.

Arcadian - Nicolas Cage comes back to save the day - and his children - from ferocious creatures at their remote farmhouse.

All My Friends Are Dead - College friends? Remote Airbnb? A secret murderer? What could go wrong in this classic toxic friend group killing spree? Looking forward to attending the biggest music fest of the year, this group of friends get together for what should be a killer weekend.

Monolith - It is about a disgraced journalist who investigates a conspiracy theory while trying to salvage her career.

some movies coming out maybe not this year but have been floating around: The Toxic Avenger (I think remake), Witchboard (remake), Year 2 (about werewolves), Shelby Oaks (A woman's desperate search for her long-lost sister falls into obsession upon realizing that the imaginary demon from their childhood may have been real), Salem's Lot (remake), Little Bites ('70s-set monster movie that highlights the lengths a parent will go to protect a child), The Crow (Reboot), Jordan Peele's untitled movie, I've also seen there's going to be another Saw (but it hasn't been confirmed), and another Scream (but that production is already a trainwreck so who knows)

[olderthannetfic]

Im neither a proshipper nor an anti at this current stage in life, but at one point i was an anti i guess? And I hate it say it, but looking back, I understand why. I don't think I actually gave a fuck about Harmful Fanfic or whatever, it was just a substitute for therapy that i couldn't get at the time (because "literally neurodivergent and a minor" or whatever, but like...actually literally neurodivergent and a minor LOL).

As weird as it sounds like, no one cared about my ACTUAL PAIN, and that made me feel EVEN MORE PAIN, so i took it out on ppl who shipped "abuse", or whatever.

It's so stupid now, as an adult who is mentally better than I was then, but as ridiculous as it was, seeing someone ship an "abusive" ship or a "queer erasing ship" (like a canonically gay character with someone of the other binary gender)...it felt eerily similar to the actual abuse I was facing and the stress that everyone was putting on me to find a boyfriend or ask why my (closeted lesbian) self didn't like any boys.

But it was so much easier to keyboard warrior about how people who ship Bad things are Bad people, than it was to fix any problems in my actual life because...well, the actual problems in my life COULDN'T be fixed. That isn't a learned helplessness thing, there was genuinely nothing I could've done. So pissing off Shippers was, like, a vessel for that, and it *felt* like I was getting to lash out at the same people who were ACTUALLY hurting me, even though that obviously is not the case. Funny thing is, it wasn't actual fandom discourse that made me switch sides, it was getting to learn more about youth liberation movements and stuff, because it was then that I recognized the actual structures that were making me hurt.

I think one silver lining is it's made me more compassionate an adult. While I don't have any defense for the antis who do actual horrendous stuff like doxxing or sending death/rape threats, etc, I do have a lot of defense for the ones who were like me and would just make posts talking about how Wrong it is to ship certain things. I know that not all antis are in the same place that I was once was, and some are just genuinely immature brats, but it's like. . . I get it, you know?

The cycle of abuse/bullying is weird and it's not often a 1:1 "I had an abusive parent so now i'll be an abusive parent", sometimes it's the chronically online stuff like I did. It's also why I'm careful-careful to not engage and to just block or, even try to have a mature discussion if I can, and if the person I'm talking to is just "a little bit annoying" rather than "actual bully doing/sending illegal stuff". A lot of them just want to be heard, I think, and it really makes me sad that this is the way they choose to be heard...but also i get it, because i was that.

--

Yup. We often discuss anti tendencies in this framework.

People want control over their environment when they have none. They want the world to make sense and for there to be simple rules they can follow to Never Mess Up. This is a very common reaction to trauma and also typical of brains that like order and neat boxes and a world full of justice and logic.

The trouble is that a critical mass of "I'm just pointing this out" type posts does tend to make all the other teens with an issue around moral scrupulosity implode. (And let's be real, plenty of the antis themselves are secretly into dark content and are trying to pray the gay kink away.)

I have some sympathy, but I'm still going to tell people they're sealioning when they are and tell them they're flat out wrong about how fantasies work, not sugar coat it because they're probably a delicate teen. There's no need to be excessively mean or treat people as irredeemable, but I also don't like how we talk endlessly about compassion for teen antis and not for teens targeted by antis. It's similar to how there are all those complaints like "Hey, I work hard to manage my mental illness, but all the support seems to go to people who are letting their issues rampage..."

[tinydefector]

Hello tinydefector!!! I wanted to say that I admire your work, especially the book "Human's effects". So could you please add Skids and Rodimus to the continuation of the book, I would really like to see them. Thank you for your attention.

Chaos on board - Human effects

Rodimus

Human effects masterlist

Prev

Next

Word count: 2.3k

Warnings: workplaces issues in space

__________

The Ambassador walks into the Ultra Magnus' office to see Megatron and Magnus both glaring at Rodimus and Daniel. "What have you two done this time? Did they go out asteroid surfing again? " They ask while making their way towards the table. As Megatron glared daggers across the table, Ultra Magnus heaved a long-suffering sigh at the newcomer's inquiry. "Worse than that, I'm afraid. It seems Rodimus and Daniel decided simulated space warfare was an... appropriate pastime." Magnus' field pulsed annoyance. 

Rodimus waved a dismissive hand, uncowed. "Aw, c'mon Mags! We were just having a little target practice in the hold, no harm done. How were we supposed to know the booster rockets were still online?"

Megatron growled deep in his intake. "You were supposed to conduct comprehensive safety checks on our cargo!." His field roiled with barely-leashed rage. 

Daniel scratched his head sheepishly. "He's, uh, not wrong. Things may have gotten a teensy bit out of hand" The ambassador pinched their brow ridge. "Let me guess. uncontrolled explosive devices in an enclosed space led to..."

"Minor structural damage and several singed circuits, yes," grated Magnus. 

A humourless smirk curled Megatron's dermas. "Appropriate punishment is in order, I believe." His tone left no doubt over the two delinquents. They were all just happy the third member of their party hadn't been present, less they all had to deal with Ratchet's wrath. 

Rodimus gulped. Daniel sank lower in his seat. The Ambassador groans in annoyance. "Daniel get back to the crew room. Your on restroom cleaning duties for the next Orn. And don't think complaining to David and Kyle is going to save you" they state. Daniel scurried from his seat, hands raised placatingly. "Yessir, right away sir! No complaining, got it." He backed towards the door, casting Rodimus an apologetic grimace. 

Rodimus merely flashed his signature cocky grin and finger-guns, to his friend. But Megatron's responding snarl and Magnus' deepening scowl boded ill for the speedster's fate. "Really, Rodimus, must you continue pursuing chaos and mayhem?" sighs their ambassador wearily. "One of these days your antics are going to get someone hurt, what were you thinking?"

"Are you questioning my leadership?" Rodimus shot back, before shrinking back into his seat as the other two mechs shoot him with a glare. Megatron loomed over the desk, a deep rumble echoes from his chassis as he does his best not to lose his temper at the prime. "Questioning implies there was leadership to begin with." He states it's not quite a sneer but his disappointment shows. 

Magnus nodded stiff agreement. "Reckless endangerment of crew and ship cannot be tolerated. You may be Co-captain of this vessel but the Ambassador and myself are responsible for the safety and security of all on board your vessel." Rodimus paled, grin faltering at the prospect of real punishment, Their optics held no mercy as sentencing began in earnest. Another incident to log in Rodimus' ever-growing file.

"Look Rodimus I don't really care what you do in your spare time but don't drag my crew into it. I'm responsible for each and every one of the humans on this ship. Do you realise how easily something could have gone wrong?" The Ambassador states while looking at the captain. Megatron growled irritably. "Spare us your coddling, Ambassador. Rodimus' 'antics' endanger us all. He's reckless, refuses to do his documentation, finds every opportunity to disappear from proper duties, Ultra Magnus and myself are the ones running the ship due to his inability to stick to a task."

Ultra Magnus nodded solemn agreement. "Recklessness cannot continue unpunished. I suggest confinement to quarters for the foreseeable future, with duties suspended."

But Rodimus' smile falls. "What! You can't just ground me. I'm not a fragging Sparkling! I said I was sorry, what more do you want?" He shouts out optics frantically looking between the three. Megatron's engine snarled. "Respect. Responsibility. Traits you've yet to demonstrate, Captain." He spat the title like an insult. 

"Enough!" The Liaison calls out loudly. "Rodimus you have been acting up recently, rather badly, why? It seems every time one of us turns our back you are sneaking off, tonight was my night off. I was having drinks with my crew and got called here because of this" they accuse, trying to find out what had Rodimus acting up. This wasn't  the first time either he had both Daniel and Traxies looped into his antics but so far been the most dangerous.

Rodimus shrank back slightly under the barrage, facade cracking. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Look, I know things have been... dicey lately. And yeah, maybe I've been pushing boundaries a bit more than usual? But I'm trying to enjoy myself, make others enjoy travelling with me. It's boring! I feel like I'm going nuts cooped up at a desk all cycle."

"So endangering lives is acceptable?" Megatron crossed his arms severely. 

“Have you any idea the amount of violations you have committed,  have you even read the list to your name?” Ultra Magnus grumbles, Rodimus looks at the table like a scolded child before the human sighs as they move closer. " Rodimus, can you actually read?" They ask, it was a slight hunch they had that he was acting up because of something with their reports and records. But he was showing signs similar to dyslexia and adhd. 

Rodimus stiffened. "What kind of insult is that?! Of course I can read - I'm the Prim- friggin' Captain, aren't I?!"

Megatron snorted slightly amused. "A fact that continues to astound and dismay in equal measure."

But the human ambassador remained focused on Rodimus. "Then perhaps the issue lies not in your duties, but how you process them. Reading reports and records can be tedious for some."

They pulled up a datapad, flipping through screens. "Let's test your comprehension. Can you summarise the contents of this supply requisition?"

Rodimus grimaces at the screen, he hates it. "Aw c'mon, do I have to? That stuff's so boring" 

Magnus rumbled a subtle warning but their ambassador kept Rodimus pinned with a stare. With a huff and whine from his engine, Rodimus gave in and began squinting at the pad. Silence fell as they watched him struggle to parse the words, tangling meanings and figures alike. 

"OK, so paperwork is hard for you, why haven't you brought this up to one of us?" They inquire this time not as annoyed. The move to sit down on the table near him. Rodimus shifted uncomfortable under the others' piercing stares. His plating flared in embarrassment as never before. "I didn't... it's not like..." He vented harshly, the truth forcing its way free at last. "Reading's always been hard, okay? The words jumble and my processors ache if I have to focus too long." 

He refused to meet their optics, ashamed to show such perceived weakness. "Why did you not come to us for aid?" Megatron asked, the anger in his voice had faded. "There is no shame in acknowledging limitations, Rodimus, but causing chaos over something that can simply be solved with changing who does the documentation."  

Rodimus' intake worked furiously. "Because... because I'm the Prime, the Captain! I'm supposed to have it all together, be the fearless leader. How can they follow me if they think I'm.. Everyone except me too know everything! I'm not Optimus. Im out here to not have to be in his shadow! ” he finally lets out before he sulks into his arms. 

The others go quiet as they watch the dishevelled speedster. 

"I'm willing to help you with taking inventory and trade bargains, but no more dragging Daniel or Traxies into your silly endeavours, understand?, are one of you able to help him with reports to cybertron and earth over different routes for trades and out travel logs" They inquire firstly to Rodimus and then to the other two mechs. 

He straightened with surprise. "You...you'd help me? Really?" His optics darted between the human and his Co-captain and enforcer. 

Magnus nodded. "Orders and logs require diligent documentation. Traversing trade routes necessitates mathematical prowess. I am equipped to handle them." 

Megatron gave the barest nod. "And I am...familiar with navigating bureaucracy. Of log reports and records" 

The meeting concludes after a while  the human stands there waiting for a moment. "Rodimus walk with me" they called out to the speedster waiting for him to begin walking beside them. Rodimus glanced up from shuffling pedes. "I...yeah. Yeah, okay." He nodded, falling into stride beside the human. His fields pulsed anxiety and gratitude in equal measure. 

Silence fell as they walked the halls, Rodimus casting furtive glances at them as they flick through the data padin hand. "You're not the first person I've worked with who has trouble reading or even understanding stuff" they remark as they begin heading to Swerve's. It takes Rodimus a little off guard that they were going to the bar. "Plus you owe me drinks after pulling me away from my night off" the human tease.

Rodimus perked up in surprise as they angled their path towards Swerve's bar. His cooling fans kicked on at the human's casual revelation and teasing quip. "Wait, seriously? There are others who struggle like me?" He asked slightly shocked. They hand the pad to Rodimus. “have a look at the screen and tell me if having a dark mood helps with being able to read stuff.” They tell him. He accepts the tablet as they walk into the bar. Optics flick to them watching like hawks as they find seats. 

“ it's easier to read some stuff still going to give My processors a short circuit tho” he grumbles slightly. They nod in understanding. “ we will working something out but that's for tomorrow” they hum as they both pull up to a table. Rodimus lifts them up to the bench where they fall into one of the human sided seats on the table. 

 "Look, about earlier - I really am sorry I dragged your crew into that mess. You deserve a break." Optics in the bar shoot to Rodimus and the Ambassador. All of them watched with vented breath after the earlier drinking session with the human's. Rodimus' plating twitched self-consciously under the weight of so many curious stares from within. But beside him, the human ambassador didn't seem fazed by the stares. 

Rodimus leaned in close. "Seems everyone's watching us. Primus, you'd think we spawned a sparkling the way they're gossiping!" He grumbles looking into the drink swerve slides in front of him before the mini bot disappears. The ambassador chuckled. "Don't mind them. Think everyone's letting the high grade and energex go to their head" the Ambassador states. "Plus my crew were here earlier having drinks and got a little out of hand, Nadia was talking about 'taking a mech for a ride' " they chuckled into their own drink.

Rodimus sputtered on his energon, cooling fans kicking into high gear at the risqué implications. His plating rippled in scandalised delight.  "Taking a mech for a ride, huh?!” His fans kicking on had made a few other mechs snicker from other tables. Across the bar, curious optics remained glued to their table, The speedster leaned on an elbow, optics filled with wonder.

"So which poor mech caught the little lady's optic?. " it was barely above a whisper. His engine rumbled warmly. “she had her eyes set on Swerve, I honestly think she was just trying to get free drinks" they call back in amusement.  But it makes Rodimus' processor go wild at the thought. The humans were just as interested in bedding a bot and the rest of the crew was with the humans. 

"Clever little thing, your Nadia! Far be it from me to judge creativity in scamming a drink or two." He mumbles, feeling the energex hitting him hard. He had suspected that Swerve must have given him a triple boost. 

So many of the other bots in the bar are still watching him and listening in on the conversation, eager to see if the rumours Kyle had spread earlier were true. "Oh Nadia is a very clever schemer. I'd say watch out for her and Millian they're thick as thieves kinda like you Daniel and Traxies. Just as much trouble makers" they chuckle as they finish their drink.

He cycled a gusty vent and pushed his empty cube away, coming to a reluctant conclusion. "As much as I'd love nothing more than to keep yakking all night, you should probably call it and get some recharge. You looked tired. I'm going to have one more round before I head to berth. Magnus is gonna have me on inventory or worse with him tomorrow," Rodimus shuddered theatrically at the thought.

 "But we should definitely do this again real soon. This was nice, and um thank you. For you know helping me" it's a rather shy reply which has them giving him a smile. "Enjoy your night captain, I'm most likely heading back to my room soon. Getting late and I plan on actually sleeping in my bed and not a desk tonight" they state while standing up. Joints popping slightly.

Once Rodimus had helped them to the ground they flahs him another smile “Good night Rodimus I'll see you tomorrow " they state as they make their way towards the door of the bar. He's sat there for a moment his spark fluttering as he watches them. before he gets a ping from swerve and other bots asking the gossip. He goes to get up and leave the bar before be can get bombarded with questions only to get cornered by Swerve. 

"A-hem! And just where do you think you're off to in such a hurry, Captain?" Swerve's cheery voice broke Rodimus from his musings as the gathered bots closed in, optics alight with curiosity and engex-loosened daring. A blush swiftly rose in Rodimus' plating, though he straightened with false bravado. "Just turning in for the night, mechs, as should you all” 

Catcalls and laughs erupted from the crowd. "Aw, no need to play coy, Roddy!" laughed Tailgate. "We all saw you chumming it up with the Ambassador - spill the goods!"

Rodimus cycled a sigh. They'd get it out of him one way or another. Best tell it himself and save some shred of dignity intact. "Alright alright, you buzzards! I'll tell you what really went down..." 

________

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[xojoules]

hey everyone guess what :)

not sure when ill have these on sale yet — i have to order protective sleeves plus i have to figure out my online shop! but im looking forward to having these available soon ❤️

[sayingyournames]

speaking of devouring fics where sirius' gender has been trans-ed, do you have any recs?? i know some people don't like to recommend fics so feel free to ignore if that's your vibe!

yes, i do have recs for this! here are a few off the top of my head, in no particular order:

honey sweet by @vajazzly

explicit - ft. city boy sirus who is down bad for the beekeeper with horrible fashion sense (but he’s good with this hands)

gathering home by @quietlemonhush

explicit - sirius raising regulus & harry after literally burning down his family home, remus is reg’s teacher. heavy themes but overall very funny & sweet & tender.

suffer for the people - orphan account

remus is regulus’s camp counselor, has lil bit of a meltdown and asks for his brother who comes to visit to calm him down. feelings occur. sooo cute & comforting, very fluffy.

our destiny in the stars - orphan account

explicit - remus is insecure about his (plus size, disabled) body and decides to try online dating where matches can’t see what the other person looks like. he meets sirius (trans, a teacher) and they uh - hit it off. this fic makes me smile so damn big. it’s just - it’s a classic, i’ve read it a million times.

whatever words i say - orphan account

sirius can’t stop acting out and it’s stressing out the rest of his band, so lily hires remus to keep an eye on him. obviously, they fall in love. a sweet lil band au.

a fool and his money - orphan account

explicit - chronically ill remus is roommates with regulus, meets his rich older brother and agrees to an arrangement: pretend to date sirius, show up with him to events - in exchange for money. y’all can guess where this is going and it’s so good. love a good sugar daddy/fake dating fic.

abyss by @titstraction

explicit - highschool au, remus & sirius are both on the track team and can’t seem to the same page. this fic is - so good. it’s very much a comfort read for me, but there are some heavy themes and transphobic jokes. this fic will hurt your feelings but it will also make you giggle and kick your feet and scream into your pillow.

have time to grow by queer_and_trashy

explicit - queer professor & amateur poet remus meets trans professional poet sirius - they try to get their shit together. hot & sweet and just, deeply deeply gay.

the entire rock n’ pole verse by @jennandblitz and fivepips

explicit - ace rock climber remus meets genderfluid dancer (mainly pole) sirius. this ‘verse is huge, there’s literally millions of words of it and y’all - i’ve read all of it. incredible ace representation, and overall just very sweet and sappy. mild angst, but everyone is in love & has a happy ending so don’t worry!

living like we’re renegades - orphan account

explicit - cheerleader sirius + journalist remus = everything i’ve ever wanted. i loooove this sirius so much they’re so gender.

the prettiest star ‘verse by raging_queer

tattoo artist sirius meets single dad remus - actually, sirius meets his child, teddy. sweet bonding with teddy looking up to Elder Queer sirius. very fluffy and comforting.

staying strangers by 3amandcounting

the texting fic, my fave of all-time. genderfluid sirius & demisexual remus. if there is one fic out there that will just make you want to open a window and yell about it to the other townsfolk - it’s this one. idek how to explain it, it’s just - it’s perfect.

also most of my fic features trans sirius, my masterlist is pinned!

disclaimer: this list is non-exhaustive, i know i’ve forgotten some, and i will be updating this tomorrow when i’m not half-asleep. and y’all, please reply with your fave trans sirius fics bc i want to read them all!!

[chalkrevelations]

There are things I say to my partner in the privacy of our living room when I’m blowing off steam that I would never in my life say to friends or other family members or bosses or work colleagues or fellow community members. I do this not because I’m two-faced but because I’m human. I get frustrated, but I’m also a grownup who realizes that my frustrations and fears in that moment are not the entirety of who I am. I have a right to express them, but I do not have the right to inflict them on the people who would be hurt by them. That’s why those conversations happen in private, in a safe space of trust, where my relationship allows me to show my partner parts of me that aren’t perfect and allows my partner to show me that I don’t have to be perfect in order to deserve to be cared about. I get support through my petty moments until I can be a better person.

This latest attack on Build is a horrifying violation of privacy and trust that leaves me feeling literally nauseated. I once again reiterate that I don’t trust third-hand amateur fan translation to be accurate and contextual, particularly given the provenance of the material, but Build himself is apparently distressed enough by at least some part of the material to make a public apology. So, that being out there, I will say: This was a private matter that should have stayed private, out of respect for everyone involved. Whatever was actually said is nobody’s business except Build’s and now, unfortunately, any named individuals who this was inflicted on and who may have been hurt by it. Which, rest assured, was the intention - to hurt not only Build with this, but also, particularly, Apo and Bible, both of whom Poi has shown her dislike of and ill-will toward in the past. I suspect some people also don’t know how abuse works, and it shows, given that what was purportedly said is a reflection of Poi’s own views back at her.

Whatever the context, I see that purity cancel culture still insists on freezing people in amber in their worst moments - without recognition of any capacity for change or growth - as long as it provides ammunition for a smug, gleeful Particicution. You’re stuck on some unkind things Build supposedly said more than a year ago? Let me tell you what I’ll remember for the rest of my life: The small, broken sound of Build’s voice just a few months ago as he tried to protect Bible and Bible’s career from a sociopath, in a telephone call that he felt he needed to secretly record as evidence of how he was being manipulated and abused.

Meanwhile, I see that swathes of KP fandom continue to be complicit in Poi’s campaign of public and dehumanizing abuse of him, which now includes not only borderline revenge porn, but separating him from his friends and isolating him. This is what abuse looks like. It’s happening in front of your eyes. Do you even care? Do you actually, legitimately care about abuse, or is it just a tool for you to use to win petty shipwars and make yourself feel righteous? Because here it is. Take a good look. This is a textbook play. And if you’re participating in reposting those screenshots of private conversations and mocking Build’s relationships and spreading vituperative language about him and acting like he deserves to have his life and career destroyed, you’re enabling an abuser. You are aiding and abetting her, as the very scenario she threatened him with - in order to maintain access to him, to keep him under control and compliant - continues to get spun out. YOU are a bully and a hypocrite and an abuser, helping to prove that the most dangerous time for an abuse victim is when they leave.

But I guess some victims do have to be perfect, huh?

.

(ETA: 7/18/23, 1520 - This post is being linked on Twitter by @cherryluminary with my permission. I'm not over there, but I increasingly feel like it's important to name what's happened, and continues to happen, to Build online as what it is - abuse. Similar to to my last post that breached containment, I'm going to ask people to remember that the behavior of Build's fans reflects on him - however fair that may or may not be - and should remain above reproach. I understand being angry - I'm angry, and at more people than I've discussed publicly, at this point. But if I find out you've been descending anywhere near the level of the ugly little sociopath in my inbox who openly admitted they want Build to kill himself, I'll block you.)

[partywithgyu]

SHE HAS A HORNY DOLL AT HOME.

Choi Soobin Smut.

dom!reader x sub!soobin.

content signs: dollification, mommy kink, very horny, slight public I guess, use of term malewife.

requested / idea by: @whatudowhennooneseesyou

☆

"Soobin you're my fucking malewife."

You had returned home with something on your mind, Soobin could tell.

You pushed the main door shut behind you before taking a seat right in the middle of the couch. Placing your bag and a shopping bag beside you, you leaned back. "Hi hun. I thought you would be a late. You'll have to wait for food. I just ordered it. Any guess what it is?," said the pretty boy who was rearranging the book shelf for some reason.

Then you called him a malewife.

Soobin was dumbfounded. Was it an insult? Did you mean that you were blessed to have him? Did it mean that you want to fuck him? He looked at you. It was hot the way your shirt wrapped your body and you formal skirt was ridding up your thigh. He had the urges to glance at whatever is under. The hottest thing at the moment was how you were eye fucking him already.

"Drop that book and come here. Don't you want to get fucked by mommy?"

Desperately he came and sat beside you. Your hand ran over his face. His eyes to your lips. Kiss him already. Not so soon though. "I gotta make my doll pretty first, right?"

Pulling out a lipstick from the MAC bag next to you, you straddled his lap. The feeling of you moving against clothed bulge made his eyes close and a hushed sound of pleasure leave his parted lips. "no no. We have to stay still," you said while completely failing to do so. You were grinding on him and your fingers tapped over his cheekbones, spreading the blush.

"Ca- Can I touch you?" he asked as if his hands weren't already heading to your boobs.

"Yes. Fuck. I spoil you too much."

"Put in my mouth. Please. Mommy."

"Not until we get that gloss on your lips."

The swaying stopped and pretty boy whined. He was unable to form a proper sentence even. His mind was fuzzy. He was desperate. He was so deep into the subspace. You still took your time to apply the gloss on his lips and highlighter on his face. Tonight he had to be a doll.

"Soobin you are so fucking pretty."

"Just fuck me then. I mean. Please fuck me. I want to-mommy use me."

You pressed your lips against his. "Dont whine baby. What does my baby want? I am going to ride my pretty doll now, okay? Lay down."

Soobin moaned when your hand ran up and down his free dick. It was already sticky. "So hot. ah. Mommy. Start riding," whines the doll as you sat on his dick. It was quick and desperate the way both of you moved next. Like a race to pleasure. Both of you were on the same team. The huge doll moved his hips up and down and whined as if you two were the only ones in the world. Until the doorbell rang.

"Fuck the food," you said. "Soobin let go, Ill go get it." Could he even hear you? A few more strokes and his fluids were already coating your insides. You had to get up and pull your skirt down, adjust your bra,close you buttons and rush to the door.

"Hi. Sorry to keep you waiting."

"Not a problem, miss."

Was that mid twenties guy looking you up and down or were you overthinking? You took the bag from his hands. "How much do I pay?," you asked, already feeling white fluid making its way down your inner thigh.

"Its paid for online already," the guy said.

"Of course it is," you said not having it in you to make eye contact. Especially when the sound of Soobin's moan reached your ears.

"Thank you for the food. Have the good night."

"You too, miss."

Oh. You were going to. Door was closed, food on table and Soobin was coming once again. White fluid was running down your leg.

Soobin knew what was coming when he saw you strip like you did. Was it even normal how horny you made him?

"What was that?"

"I was just letting him know that you are fucking me. You already have a doll. I am your doll. Touch me again."

"Lets put your shameless mouth to some good use. Get ready to have that lipstick all over your face."

[omniseurs-blog]

Last rant before bed, because I guess I'm in a ranting mood today and I need to focus on the positives and bettering my life instead.

On being trans and schizospec/having any mental illnesses

I try to hide the fact that I'm trans if I'm open about being mentally ill and hide being mentally ill if I'm open about being trans. It's a natural reaction to all the "trans people are just crazy! Trans people are delusional!" And "schizophrenics are liars/manipulators!" "Schizophrenics can't know themselves!" arguments.

Let's open up about this a little more, maybe I won't be lynched at the stake for being both at the same time. I came out as trans when I was 11 years old, I'm 23 now. Most people would never guess I was born with no dick, and for the most part, there's no reason for me to tell anyone who isn't a medical professional that I am trans. I don't date, I barely attempt to make friends and don't have much of an urge to (I just know socializing is healthy, and not socializing will kill you younger), and I'm not really doing anything that would make it essential for anyone to know what's in my pants or under my shirt.

Unfortunately, around 14-15 years old my father's genetics caught up with me and I had my first psychotic break all the way up until starting to recover at 18, and any semblance of connection to the trans community was lost along with my sanity. The trans communities I talked in pushed me away as much as I pushed them away because of my schizophrenia. Trying to talk in schizophrenia support groups, of course, I was pushed away for being trans. In order to talk anywhere about anything I needed support with, I had to, essentially, code switch. In trans groups, I may as well be the most mentally stable person ever who just needs a little help with this one aspect of transition, acceptance, or passing, and then I'm off to the schizophrenia support group, where I might as well be the straightest manliest man ever who just needs a little help with this one aspect of delusional thinking and identifying hallucinations, and then I'm off to the rest of society to be the most mentally healthy straightest manly man to exist (and then crash at home in a mess of unmasking and questioning my existence and if life will ever get easier).

Essentially, I abandoned both communities, exclusively getting help in therapy, through medications, self help books and self therapy, and focusing on things that I actually cared about, but that lack of acceptance is still there in both communities, in the broader public, and online.

I'm only one or another to each person I know, or else it's back to desperately explaining that, no, I'm not experiencing "delusions of gender dysphoria", yes, I'm actually trans, yes, I know I am, I've been out as trans for longer than my symptoms appeared AND recovered from them (12 years now), yes, I'm medicated, no, the hormones didn't cause the psychosis or else I'd be in psychosis right now and would've fallen out of it during the ~3 year period where I want taking hormones because the dumbass doctor reached the same conclusion, and yes, I'm still happier as a man even if being a woman meant psychosis never would have happened (it would've happened either way)

[heyyallitsbeth]

You Are The Daydream

Inspired by this comic: https://www.pixiv.net/en/artworks/30173046

The morning light shining through the blinds was fragmented. A cacophony of birds sang out of tune. The room slowly shifted in and out of focus, an unstable 3D image of itself. My alarm was blaring, and the jarring sound rang in and out of my ears, a sensory overload I hadn’t ever felt. There was a crushing weight on my chest. A splitting migraine broke me into pieces. I reached for my phone to shut off the alarm, and was met with another hand brushing against mine. It was soft and gentle. Asuna’s?… Our fingers intertwined in an embrace, her knuckle lightly brushing up against the snooze button. I turned my head to the woman lying on top of me, we pulled into an embrace with a kiss. Except, instead of meeting the ember eyes I expected, a purple galaxy laid before me. Locks of ashen hair tickled my blushing cheek as we stared into eachother. Where had I seen these eyes before?

There was a light knock and the sound of the door creaking open.

“Kazutoooooooo- breakfast is ready, you better not be sleeping in agai-”

Sugu. Based on that reaction, she’s seen everything- shit. 

We pulled out of our lip-locked connection, a small trail of saliva linking us together remained as we pulled away. We looked towards my little sister, like a pair of deer caught in headlights. 

“K-kazuto?... Wh-what are you?...”

There was the sudden rush of her out of the room, followed by a frantic call.

“Emergency girl meeting Asuna- call the others- Dicey Cafe!”

Me and my bedroom intruder took a moment to meet eachother’s view. I knew who they were. On top of me was me. The me from Gun Gale Online. A mutual understanding was found as we rushed out of my room, my pajamas ill-fitting their slender feminine figure. 

…

“Huh… Yeah that is your GGO model huh?” 

Sugu anxiously bit into a waffle as they sat at the table for breakfast.

“Yeahhhhh we’re as confused as you I’m sure.”

My feminine twin sat beside me, finger on her mouth thinking.

“I suppose given the experimental procedures with our fluctlight, it isn’t impossible that our soul was cloned, but a full human body replicant seems beyond the current reach of our capabilities…”

I left behind another life in the Underworld, after 200 years the me that lived there had passed on. But… maybe these imprints remained in some form. But how could that imprint be beside me?

“Y’know Kazuto, I’m more curious as why your clone is a girl, and why you were practicing swordfighting with your tongues-”

“H-hey I assumed it was Asuna laying on top of me- And they’re a guy, but I’m not sure if that makes it better-”

I was interrupted by the other me patting themselves down in all of their delicate areas. 

“Nope! Looks like this time this model’s a girl- I mean I guess the parts don’t make a girl! But like- whatever you get it. I guess for convenience you can call me Kiriko instead.”

“Kiriko huh… Hey Kazuto, why’s it that you have a female name picked out already?”

Suguha pointed a fork in my direction accusatory.

“That’s confidential information… Wait why are we assuming I’m not the clone?”

“Well duh, you’ve still got my old body. Makes more sense that you’re the real one.”

“Fair point.”

“Alright- regardless we gotta head to Dicey Cafe. The girls are expecting me now, and I guess we need to get our introductions in order.”

…

Suguha and I walked into Dicey Cafe. Kiriko had decided it would be best to fix herself up slightly and she’d catch up afterwards. Liz, Silica, Sinon and Asuna were already waiting at a table.

“O-oh Kazuto’s joining us huh?”

Silica seemed genuinely shocked at my inclusion in the matter.

“Well, I mean, this is about me after all-”

I pulled up a seat beside Asuna, who was glaring daggers into my very soul.

“So you guys gonna tell us what all this is about? Why are ya draggin us out this early?” 

Liz made no attempt to hide any fury in her voice, luckily we were the only patrons in the cafe at this time.

“Given the circumstances, I would love an explanation.”

Sinon seemed more calm-spoken than the others, but there was an undeniable rage in her eyes.

“Sinon, you don’t have to worry, you’ll understand before anyone else.”

My eyes trailed away from the table, wishing this nightmare was really just a dream.

“I think it would be best for all of us to arrive before the discussion.”

Sugu did her best to cover for me, knowing it was slightly her fault I was being grilled at the moment.

“Huh? There’s more people coming?”

Silica perked up.

“Oh yes, our guest of honor…”

I grumbled out.

A ringing at the front door pulled the attention away from me for a moment. A raven haired girl in a plain face mask and girl’s school uniform walked in alongside Klein. He ran over to our table excitedly.

“Yo! Hey guys, I didn’t expect y’all to be here. I was just helpin this cute chick find her way here.”

Looking up at the girl, I could instantly tell it was Kiriko, and that she was doing her best to hide a blush.

“Sorry Sugu, Kii-boy, I got a biiiiiit lost following you guys.”

Her voice may have been slightly softer than mine, but it should have been unmistakably mine to anyone.

Sugu looked at me expectantly.

“So do you wanna tell him?”

“Oh no I wanna drag this on as long as possible actually.”

That comment elicited a giggle from Kiriko, and suddenly Sinon stood on end. She stared at Kiriko and back to me, then to Kiriko again.

“Oh you’re fuckin’ kidding me Kirito…”

“Ah so you’ve seen the issue huh?”

“Yup, it’s me, I’m the issue Sugu warned y’all about.”

Kiriko did a curtsey in her skirt, seeming to love the spotlight, even if it was a spotlight of daggers.

Asuna looked to me, tears at the edges of her eyes.

“Kirito… who is this?”

“So is that the no-good floozy you were sleepin with?”

Liz pounded on the table.

Kiriko and I both laughed and Sinon shook her head.

“Ugh… no you idiots. You- take off your facemask!”

Kiriko obliged Sinon’s request and showed off her face… which was just my own face with a bit more makeup.

“Recognize me yet?~”

Kiriko playfully winked at Sinon.

“Guys… that is Kirito…”

Sinon looked exasperated.

“Well, my name’s Kiriko now- but yeah pretty much spot on!”

She slid out of Klein’s grasp and into the seat beside me. Klein took one look at me, then at Kiriko, and then walked out of the cafe. 

“W-what do you mean that you’re Kirito- or Kiriko?”

Asuna stammered out, justifiably confused by all this.

“Well, today I woke up, and suddenly there were two of me. We don’t have a solid explanation besides the experimental work on my fluctlight, but that’s just a guess.”

I relaxed in my seat and held the hand of my dear wife. It felt almost identical to Kiriko’s.

“Jeez, with the urgency Sugu called us with, I thought she caught ya in bed with another woman.”

Liz relaxed slightly, pouting and crossing her arms.

Sugu giggled slightly.

“Well technically I did catch them sleeping in bed together.”

“Hey now, that’s unfair. If you called them every time I was sharing a bed with a girl, you’d have to call almost every morning last month when you kept coming into my room after your nightmares.”

Silica blushed at my comment.

“Y-you two sleep together?”

Sinon smirked a bit.

“Y’know I’m an only child but I’m pretty sure sleeping with a sister isn’t exactly typical.”

“Yeah well. She’s actually our cousin, and my parents are actually my aunt and uncle so like. That’s not exactly typical. I don’t think.”

Kiriko tried to defend us, but probably made it worse.

“I-I don’t think she meant it like that…”

Asuna was clearly having the roughest time with this news.

“Hey Asuna, it’s okay, I’m still me… And she’s just… Another me. So you don’t need to worry about anything. Everything is completely fine.”

Kiriko waved and blew a kiss at Asuna. I guess technically Asuna is her girlfriend too huh?

“Huh so I guess I am bi then huh… Well now I’ve got two Kirigayas to marry, I just expected this to be a lot worse.”

She slowly brightened up at the thought of having two Kirito-adjacent partners.

“Yeah, that emergency line is typically just for whenever one of us suspects ya of bein with another girl.”

Liz playfully teased.

“D-do you really have that little faith in me guys?”

“Well you’re constantly surrounded by new girls so…”

Silica could barely look at me as her thought trailed off.

A giggle broke the silence, erupting into a full blown laugh. Kiriko was beside herself.

“Hear that Kii-boy? The code is only for other girls! So everything we did with Eugeo is completely fair game!”

She laughed harder at her own joke, but as all eyes pointed back to me, I looked to her with death in my eyes.

“Kirito-kun, whose Eugeo?”

[lestappenforever]

feel free to ignore this if you’re not comfortable talking about it but i agree with you about the different body type comment. some bodies just look different than others no matter how much or how hard you work out, and it has been such a source of insecurity for me because i've always wanted a thigh gap and i just don't think i will ever get one. and hearing/seeing things being said by "influencers" about eating and working out just brings me down so often. i wish they could preach being health rather than being "fit"

Anon, that is exactly right. Body types are different, and that means they will look different, even if you try to follow the same diet/exercise regime as someone you see online. And that's okay! Different body types are beautiful! That's the fucking beauty of humanity, honestly, because what a dreadful, dull world it would be if we all looked the same!

I am so sorry to hear you're struggling with insecurities, anon. I don't know how old you are, but I'm turning 30 this year and I'm so fucking relieved I wasn’t a kid/teenager during the modern age of social media. I remember wanting a thigh gap so fucking bad when I was in my teens, and I couldn't understand why I couldn't achieve one, and that was without being bombarded with videos and photos and "tips" from fitness influencers on every social media app. But as I grew older, I realized that my body build just won't allow me to have a thigh gap. My teammates when I played handball used to call me "thunder thighs", and guess what? I learned to love that! I learned to embrace it! Because I realized that in order for me to ever manage to achieve a thigh gap, I would have had to become seriously unhealthy. I would have to starve myself and stop being active and make myself ill because that’s the only way my thighs could have shrunk to a small enough size that there could have ever been a gap between them. And let me tell you, anon, I have been so much happier since coming to that realization. I've gone from wanting a thigh gap, to realizing that I would much rather have thighs that could crush the skulls and egos of men.

Some bodies are more naturally equipped to have a thigh gap, and mine simply isn’t. At all. And if yours isn’t either, then that's perfectly okay! So please don't compare yourself to the influencers you see online, who not only might have a completely different body type than yours, but who also make a living off of posting photos and videos and whatnot that aren’t actually natural in a lot of cases. Or even real, in some extreme cases. And please don't measure how "fit" you are based on whether there’s a gap between your thighs or not, because I assure you that's not the standard.

Being healthy is so much more important than being fit, and I, too, wish more influencers would focus on that as opposed to what can be completely unrealistic body expectations. Society as a whole would be much better off if they did.

If you are healthy, anon, then that's what matters. Not how big or small your thighs are, I promise. ❤️

[fightabear]

Hi. I know ur very into Dirge (ff7) and wanted to know ur thoughts on the ending as i was confused. How did Wiess die, how long was he dead for and what was his and Nero’s plan? Ur a art account so don’t answer this if you don’t want to post not art content

HAHA oh anon, oh anon.

i'm always happy to blather about dirge but this... this goes into the deep lore. the forgotten lore. the lore of ancient bygone times.

by which i mean playonline.

playonline was a short lived multiplayer mode set in deepground where the player character is a tsviet. it lasted for about eight months and then went offline, and with it - went basically all of the lore surrounding deepground.

we're still missing a lot of information. but, we have a vague understanding of what's going on thanks to the cutscenes (which we also never got stateside) translated by grimoire valentine. you can watch that here and it explains a little bit.

the tl;dr is that Weiss had a virus in him and if he killed the Restrictors (DeepGround's jailers, there's a whole mess of lore there) then the time-release virus would be let loose and Weiss would be damning himself to die.

Now, this is sort of where things get shaky as we don't know how long it took the virus to kill Weiss, nor are we entirely certain when PlayOnline took place in the grand scheme of things. Rosso said that they killed their jailers three years ago, and at some point Weiss died and Nero started pretending to be Weiss to keep DeepGround in line, and then Hojo made contact with Nero and proposed the whole Omega deal.

But we don't know when any of these beats take place. Weiss could have been dead the full three years and Nero was just hanging out by his corpse in full delululand until Hojo found a perfectly good body just waiting to be inhabited. I think it's a safe bet to say that even if Weiss had died, Nero would have found a way to perserve the body in hopes of finding some kind of cure.

( There's also the possibility that Weiss' death was more a brain death and his body kept breathing / he was experiencing some kind of 'locked in' syndrome - again, we don't know!)

He also could have just been battling the illness and may have only died recently.

I believe it was said somewhere that he died while using his SND abilities to hunt for a cure, which probably only could have happened once the networks came back online. I was under the impression for years that Hojo possessed Weiss and told the plan to Nero, but after reading the Japanese script it seems that Nero knew it was Hojo the whole time and just went with it.

Again, shit is shaky. Hojo Jojo apparently needed the networks to come online in order to make contact with DeepGround again. We know that's fairly recent, as if I am remembering correctly, that's what the festival in Kalm is celebrating.

We also aren't sure if Weiss was involved in the plan, or if Nero had just lost his fucking mind at this point and was agreeing to do what Hojo proposed without considering that it was - y'know, Hojo. We do have Weiss' speech so it's entirely possible Weiss was still alive during this hunk of it and then died as things went on.

As for the plan - I gotta be honest, I don't think either of them were spearheading this thing. I'm pretty sure this whole hysterical idea came about because Hojo took advantage of Nero's intense grief and Nero was just doing shit without thinking too hard about it. He probably thought he was doing what Lucrecia did for Vincent, because I sure as shit don't think Nero would think destroying the entire planet to get his brother back would solve his problem of 'well fuck, we're separated by death'. So I'm not sure Nero even fully understood what would happen when Omega ascended until Hojo monologued about it and pissed him off enough to come back from the dead.

Nero and Weiss only really got a plan when Nero ( who, I'm still shaky on what's happening with Nero in those final moments. My best guess is his physical body finally gave out and due to Circumstances /gestures vaguely at chapter 9 of rebirth/ his soul can't go into the lifestream for Reasons) wrested control back from Hojo and fused with Weiss. They did intend to just give the middle finger to the planet and soar the stars, because at that point - what else can they do? But Omega was corrupted because Nero is as impure as things in the lifestream can get, and so they manifested a fucked up version of it.

My personal take is the brother's didn't fully fuse and that the "omega" weiss rides around in the Omega Weiss fight is what's left of Nero / is basically what Chaos would look like if Chaos wasn't using Vincent as a host? And the reason why Chaos "goes back to the planet" is because Chaos fucks off into Nero's body and Omega is still sort of chilling out in Weiss.