#i guess i needed to info dump
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I'm late to the Queen Charlotte party, but can I just say that Freddie Dennis could have chosen literally any other way to have Reynolds look at Brimsley in the first episode and he went with A FULL SCALE LOOK THE MAN UP AND DOWN, just all soft eyes and playful smirk. Like sir, please! Brimsley is having a crisis and you're trying to flirt!!! (Anyway, I love them.)
#brimsley x reynolds#queen charlotte#brimsley#Reynolds#queen charlotte a bridgerton story#bridgerton#Guess who came back to Tumblr just to info-dump about these two#I need an outlet for this#it cannot just be silent brainrot#Bless all the lovely fanfic writers on AO3 for their BrimsleyxReynolds contributions#You help me cope#Freddie Dennis
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feeling very greg hirsch rn (at my mum’s fancy work event but im wayyy out of my depth and im too cringefail for this and rich people food sucks ass)
#succession#succession hbo#greg hirsch#guess who finally started succession 😎#*impending info dump ask from ash in 5… 4… 3…*#anyways i need to get back to centrepieces or whagever
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i was a bad person and here is my big message about it
even tumblr couldn't hold this much of a post so i made it under the cut. well. i was trying to write it for YEARS sooo i guess it's a little hard to squish in something small
i am frightened of seeing your reaction on this post but. it needs to be made. i wanted to make it for years. if not now then when?
long story about one fundamental thing i deeply regret and want to leave in the past and move on, and today is the perfect time to talk about it.
so. as i told, yesterday was my 26 birthday. and it was a special one. cause i gave it concept
26 years. 25+1. for me it means that half of my life is behind me. (maybe 1/3 if i will be lucky). i decided my 26 birthday will be beginning of my new era. i will leave my past behind and will go into my. present.
the problem is that my past is soooo fucked up
i did a lot of cringe bad things, WHICH I DEEPLY REGRET ABOUT but i want to tell you about one, which is haunting me the most. i thought about writing post about it sooo much times, i tried, but i couldn't do it everytime because then i thought about it i felt soooo ashamed and just burning in selfhate so what's the thing and why exactly this thing I want to tell you about above all of the things which i regret? well because now i am totally opposite person to that mindset which i am ashamed of so! pls keep in mind that i REGRET having that mindset. i think i realized that it's something not good in my 19 years old (my 19 years old is my turning point in life in general), now i am one day 26, but it's still was hunting me!!! 6 fucking years of constant shame and hating myself!!! at this moment i got rid of this thing in my mind and actions completely, and i want to put the final nail in the coffin by this post. so!!! i.. H A D (NOW I DON’T!!!)... fat fetish :c ( * internal screaming full of fear, selfhate and realising that i can hurt someone's feeling by that * ) i almost always had complicated relationships with fatness. first anorexia, but, at the same time then i hated my body i realized that i find fat people beautiful, hot even? (mostly masculine dudes? i don't remember that i thought about others?). and then i got into my horny ~18 yeaaars and ehhhh i was exploring my horny feelings and preferences. i was deep diving in that fat fetish content, i even made sooome drawings (I think I posted, ~2 on internet AND I HATE THE FACT THAT THEY EXIST SO MUCH). and. next thing will sound naive. but. people who do bad things are always dumb and don't realize basic shit. so. i haven't seen anything bad in fat fetish. and at this time i already had my own moral compass, which i still have AND it helped me get out of this my moral compass: if it hurts someone - it's bad. if not – then it’s fine. and my depiction of fat fetish was reversed in my head. i thought that people participating in it.. feeling sexy and validated? that it's something powerful (I DON'T THINK THIS WAY NOW!) but then i saw one post
it was a person, saying, that they saw a content with fetishization of their appearance and they felt uncomfortable and humiliated by it
and i was like "wait what??? fetishes make people sad??? IT SOMETHING WHAT HURTS SOMEONE??? It's!!! It's... a bad thing!!!"
and i think since then i started to go away from it?
and it's not a second, day or month. you know that getting rid of cigarettes is hard and takes time, right? imagine how hard and how much time will take getting away from moral mindset mistake
if you do something bad it usually means that it is deep in your life
it's hard to go away from people with same mindset, your actions in the past which you thought was fine are now your shame etc etc
but!!! i've been working on myself. i don't want to hurt people, and yeah, hurting someone's feelings counts too.
sooo time was going by and it was less and less fetish content in my corner of internet. i realized that fetish is NOT something powerful and cool or sexy. representation is!!! you can draw gorgeous powerful sexy person without fetishization. actually people on fetish art... well, sometimes they don't even look like people. more like fucked up sex toys. it's so wrong, so bad and i am so ashamed that at some point of my life i thought it's something not awful
then i got into art community, more queer and bodypositive, i learned how to love my body, accepted it at 100% beat the fuck up anorexia. my feed in all the social media are now queer/bodypositive/artists usually all at once. if i see fetish blog reblogging me (i can't check every one but sometimes it happens) i ban it and
and now i don't watch any fetish content, don't have fantasies or dreams about that. now even if i see some content by accident (then you are in internet, you sometimes see shit which you don't want to see, like idk, some fetish blog relogging my art) it makes me feel uncomfortable and i don't turn on at all.
it was the last thing of this to defeat - physical desire. It’s like addiction, sometimes i wanted to watch Fetish Horny Content sooooo bad that it literally was on physicall level, and i just, well, watched and blamed myself for that after
and here is a little strange part, because one day it just... disappeared? with all my libido. aand honestly, it's fine, maybe i can't get turn on at all, but better not feeling libido at all then having it and having this shit in the head. aaaand also i have kiinda same emotions from... art. like cool art. in general. like, show me a good dramatical movie, some cool music, some touching piece of art, cool fucking made edit - i am shivering and crying tears of joy. i have this sooo, yep, it's enough for me, and i can survive loosing libido, if it's price for taking fetish from my head - shut up and take my... libido (okay that part turn out kinda goofy but like, let’s take it as lightning the mood because all the post is some fucked up dark shit)
so yeah. long story short, i was a cringe bad person and i regret that. i've done many cringe things but i decided to tell you exactly about this one because it is fundamental thing in my life and, as you can see, my art
as you could notice, all my characters are fat. and i am trying my best to draw them respectfully. goal of my life is trying to be good person (trying because you can never be sure that you are 100% right. you need to listen people and be ready to change. it's never ending road. what's why i use word "trying". you can't "be" good. only try) goal of my art is to bring people happiness by art, and representation is my method.
i feel very ashamed of that fact that i was participated in phenomen like fat fetish and now i make opposite thing - draw art, based on representation of fat people (and also queer and having other features but this post is not about that)
aaand yeah, sounds not very nice
but... i just hope that you can see that i am drawing fat people with respect. yes, a lot of time my characters presented as sexy. but i am trying to draw fat characters sexiness in respectful way. i've seen fetish art - and i am trying to draw NOT like that.
i learned my lesson. i don't want EVER draw fetish art again. i want!!! draw good things which brings people joy. i deeply sorry for that fetish thing was in my mind. but it's gone. I fought it in me for years, i won, fuck this thing. i want this thing stay in the past!!!!!
and brain, stop fucking hunting me with "whEn thEy wIll KnoW thEy Will Be All DissApoinTed in YoU!! ALL YOUR ART INFLUENCE WILL ZERO OUT THEN PEOPLE WILL FIND OUT!!!" these thoughts were been killing me for YEARS
so
i am deeply ashamed of having fat fetish phaze. but it's over. i learned that it's bad, i don't want to have it in my life ever again. and i don't want my drawings of fat people be part of it. i do it for different reason - to make representative art, which bring people joy, not hurting them.
i was carry this self-fight for years. and this day, my 26 birthday, seems like perfect day to finally leave this shit in the past and move on. i mean, i realised that it's a bad thing ~5-6 years ago. but my brain didn't let go thoughts about that. i am done with this. i want to break free from this shame. i hope i can have a second chance on that...
i really hope that you guys will be able to get joy from my art after that. i got rid of this shit in my mind, i promise. just. please don't turn back from me because because of this mistake. if you can.
(pls, if you have words of support, leave a comment. idea of this post was hunting me for years, and now it finally written. it's finally out of my chest. i want to get free from this. thank you)
#sorry if the thing turned out messy#last parts are the most messy i guess#but i hope#it have. like. meaning#i want to get this skeleton out my closet#i was writing this all day#there was a moment then i thought i delited the note on the phone with this by accident in the evening#then i was almost done#and i was so furious#but no i just get it in archive or smth#anyway#i am just dumping the info now#i need to sleep#pressing “post” button and going to bed#eh#i feel so shitty#ehhhhh#but. some day i had to make this post
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I think doing shipping through and aroace lens makes things complicated but also interesting. I think one reason I don't enjoy straight ships as much is because it's very rare for people write/talk about them with a queerplatonic dynamic. straight romance is so "normalized" in society, it's hard to get any other dynamic out of those ships from other people in conversation or writing. it's mostly always romantic. (especially when "guys and girls can't be *just* friends" is extremely common and has ruined mamy of my own friendships) but I enjoy a handful of a straight ship with that dynamic. it's just way more rare to see talked about than gay ones from my observation. anyway point is, more queerplatonic type ships and stuff please! those aren't explored enough!
#its really hard for me to describe what queer platonic means to me and how i see it and how that applies to ships i enjoy or even irl#i guess one way to explain it is being life partners without the need for romantic/sexual stuff and they dont date other people#dedicated to each other for life and act like partners but arent romantic/sexual about it.#example are cynonari. they adopter collei togther and are dedicated to each other. but theyre very fun as queer platonic relationship#and for straight version theres himeko and welt. a strong pair. work well togther. our train parents. platonic but life partners#partners in this crazy space train adventure that take care of us gremlin kids#and then theres also the queer straight platonic dynamic that's fun as well. 2 queers who form a straight platonic ship#think kafblade. how i like to imagine it is a lesbian and agender-aroace-gay-in-previous-life come together as platonic life partners#playing with this stuff and going outside the normal gender/sexuality box is fun#lee text#lee rambles#ive seen hi3 fans get very loudly upset about hsr fans shipping himeko and welt. but i never see them discussed as queerplatonic!#it could make everyone happy haha. life partners but not the romance. theyre our train parents but they arent a married couple!#disclaimer: ship your own ships. this is only about my ships and how i feel#before identifying as nonbinary i was subjected to the whole “guys and girls cant be just friends” bulshit and lost friends over it#im not even allowed to be friends with people as an aroace if im seem as a binary gender!!!!! it makes me so angry#i think straight shipping as an aroace that enjoys queerplatonic dynamics is a very weird trigger for bad feelings from those experiences����#but its not why i prefer thos dynamic. the why is just being aroace in general and wanting that kind of relationship if i had a partner#but having a side of straight obsessed people ruining our friendships over their straight obsession feels bad#by straight obsession i mean we cant be friends anymore because they decided they saw me as a binary gender opposite theirs 🙄#and accused me of liking them and said im the one that ruined the relationship#where was i going with this i think im just rambling and info dumping about my brain stuff too much 😅
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I'm looking for a BETA 💫
Hey guys! I've mentioned this before on the end notes of some of my fics but i guess here will reach more audience so if you are ~british~ or if you know british-ism + are a native english speaker, I'll love to have a chat with you! 🌟
just putting it out there in case someone is interested! 🐢
#omg this is nerve wrecking#but yeah.#I'm really insecure about my english and I'm in need of a second pair of eyes#same with being a writer tbh but i guess if i have some feedback the impostor syndrome might not hit as hard#so please help this poor soul#what i can offer: cool memes + nice cat pics + info dumping of random things xd + a great friendship! + virtual hugs<3
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#im sorry but if someones talking about a media that makes them happy#and then you feel the need to tell them that you couldnt get into it because you didnt like the characters/aspects of the media#and then proceed to tell them why *your* comfort media is so much better than theirs and why theirs sucks?#literally fuck off. like-#i get not liking a media. thats completely understandable#but why the fuck did you feel the need to tell them in a more elaborate way of why you dont give two shits#please tell me why you think belittling someones comfort media because it wasnt your cup of tea is okay#basically in simple terms. its like if someone was info dumping abt a thing that makes them happy only to be bluntly told#‘umm i kinda dont give a shit. anyways look at this this is so much better than that’#if that makes any sense#/NBH BTW i prommy its not anyone here so dw#/gen#rant#vent#?? i guess#idk. the person im talking about is kind of a fucking hypocrite and i could *not* care less if they see this
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I LOVE your Gems Demon/Angels AU. I'm imagining that Rose/Pink would be their mother
that's… not really how it works in this au. demons and angels in this au are still gems, meaning they are still inorganic.
the whole concept is still sorta being workshopped so take this info with a grain of salt, but how it works in the demons AND angels version of this au is that both demons and angels use life energy in order to create their own kind.
angels use life energy from the planets themselves, using things called extractors in order to get that energy. any excess energy is stored for later use, but the energy being used is combined with magic from the angel diamonds in order to create some or even a whole army of new gems. once all the life energy is extracted from a planet, it will become lifeless and hollowed out (sound familiar?) and all the rest of the living beings on said planet will die out within days or even weeks. the angels don't know this, however, because they never stick around long enough to find out.
demons use life energy from animals and humans, humans being the main target most of the time. the life energy found in animals and humans is simply refered to as spirit. how is works is that the more self aware a species is, then the more powerful (and thus beneficial) that species' spirit is. sometimes depending on the species they are getting the life energy from, more than one spirit will need to be used for a single gem. life energy is somewhat scarce for demons because of the method they use to get it. some of the peridots of this au's version of hell have come up with concepts for making more troops that don't require scavenging for life energy, but that idea has yet to be approved.
both parties in this au are in the wrong, both use methods that harm natural environments and even whole planets.
#first info dump about this au that was ever posted on here ever let's gooooooooo#there is still so much i have yet to explain-#and i still need to draw everyone else's designs#but we'll get there when we get there i guess
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it is no longer a desire, I need someone to talk to about future MLWTBB stuff. I’ve talked about some stuff with Ham already, but there’s a lot I’m keeping secret from her on purpose for funsies. I wanna keep as many secrets from my readers as possible too. but idk anyone who’d be willing to listen to me gush about this stuff either gaaaaaaaaaaah 😫
#anyone willing to take one for the team on this one LOL#like it's cool if you haven't read any of the stories#or even if you plan to one day idc#as long as you're cool with spoilers I guess??#I just need someone I can info dump to about my silly AU without being judged ldkflskdjfh#MLWTBB chatter
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I cant believe I am already on fem law... this happened like 2 days ago I cannot do it....
#nami saying luffy's dream is so fitting to him... she gets him she does...#the citizens are too kind... 'admit your fault' 'if you had treated us more nicely' come on pull out the guillotines#they are about to erradicate lulusia???? omg goodbye sabo.... omg inu has the nuclear codes devil fruit#sabo hope to god you made use of that logia fruit because jesus#omg the mid ad scenes are of luffy jumping to hug his crew.... i could cry#also if they have this power why even use the buster call.... the buster call is like a warning to other islands i guess but this....#reserved for ultra secret world government bussiness i guess... also you might appreciate the letters bf on frankys coat#thats because he is boyfriend material hope this helps#robin and chopper just chilling inside... chopper has one of tamas hats omg....#luffy is like yeah i might be flying off too but we are flying off together <3 also hello bonney not gonna lie i knew you were coming#omg the end credits... and Robin info dump???? quick recap of the past 500 chapters lmao#talking tag#watching one piece#episode 1089#OMG SUNNY DOWN??? tashigi and tbe children omg... g-14?? also koby collecting blonde partners ajsgaauab#OMG MECHAS ON THE SEAS not gonna comment on bonney we all know what i think. jail.#episode 1090#vegapunk needing funding akdhaksjsks.... so real.... the world government needs to fund the science department#the dumb loud ones are bait akdhaksbaksjak zoro and robin for the win....#bonney luffy and chopper what a trio akdhaksj#the episodes are now 18 minutes. one piece the time i have with you is limited... i am about to ration episodes like they're food in a war#so the seraphim are from sword or vegapunk???? and what does the cp0 want with vegapunk also luccis beard???#'you guys are about to blow up!' 'i have always been like this' JINBE!!!! AJSHAKAJA perreciclador.... incredible name omg#'my job is to be violent' aksjak i was thinking that vegapunks personalities are split in between the six and yeah looks like it#fucking blackbeard again.... DIEEEEEE!!! LAW KICK HIS ASS!!!!i cannot do it with the short episodes i cant.... i cant live like this....#episode 1092#the episode is called the winner takes it all.... sick abba reference. god... omg having leaks already.... BUT WHY IS THIS HAPPENING#law transitioned into a man by brute haki force ajdhajsjsjsj feminization sickness 💀💀💀 someone get on ao3....#SHACHI CAN DO THAT???? AND PENGUIN???? IS THAT PUDDING???? And fucking kuzan...... I still dont understand why he is with them...#episode 1091
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if anyone wants to know about my ocs my ask box is always open :0 or draw requests or oc memes
#i usually write a stream of conscious of oc thoughts at like 3am so i dont usually info dump on main about them as much#my oc blog is soupcozy i spent like 20-30min tryign to clean up some of the grammar/typos/formating and ended up writing more shit#aaaa also dont read too deeply about some of it i keep changing and rewriting and will edit the post so it fits more of whatever current#text#im shy about sharing writing and stuff but i want to do more esp sicne i have more clip files and “comics” i need to grow up and post#once i fix the blog up more ill offically link it i guess lmao#i also have more than just kei and friends i have some other ocs on there but right now kei and them i am fixated on
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🖊️💌 𝘀𝘂𝗸𝘂𝗻𝗮'𝘀 𝗳𝗮𝘃𝗼𝘂𝗿𝗶𝘁𝗲 𝗽𝗿𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗽𝗲𝗻-𝗽𝗮𝗹 🖊️💌
: ̗̀➛ tropes: fem! reader 𖥔 minors do not interact 𖥔 prisoner sukuna x his penpal 𖥔 just plot with porn 𖥔 mentions of abuse 𖥔 mentions of sexual assault 𖥔 pussayy eating rawr but also u suck his dick so 𖥔 uraume and toji found family 𖥔 he would kill for you 𖥔 alternate universe 𖥔 nsfw
: ̗̀➛ words: 10k?? idfk it's long
: ̗̀➛ notes: happy halloween, mamas! 🎃 i know ive been MIA for a while but thats because i wasnt feeling creative. but now ive dumped a 10k sukuna fic on you for you to read at 3 in the morning. this one's got a kick to it yall. its long but give the bitch a chance, shes good. if you have any requests, don’t hesitate to send them. pls follow, reblog, like, comment—whatever you want! okay love you and enjoy.
So, this was where you’d ended up—on a site for writing to prisoners. A pen-pal with an inmate.
How lonely did you have to be to fill out your info, pay a yearly fee, and do this? The answer: really, really lonely. Orphaned, friendless, and scarred from a relationship that had left you with broken ribs and a blind eye. And as if to top it all off, you wanted to reach out to a criminal. I guess you deserved at least that small bit of connection.
You scrolled through inmate profiles, noting their crimes—arson, theft, cybercrime, drug trafficking, money embezzlement, and so on. None of them were charged with homicides or serious offences.
One profile did catch your eye. The smirk in his mugshot suggested he’d probably killed someone and managed to evade the cops before they could pin anything on him.
“Sukuna Ryomen,” you whispered, clicking on his profile and staring at a laundry list of crimes. “Aggravated assault, drug manufacturing and distribution, kidnapping—Jesus—extortion, cybercrime, Satanism . . . what the hell?” You chuckled as you scrolled further. “Bank burglary, vandalism of religious properties—so that’s the Satanism part—illegal possession of firearms, stalking?”
Why was this man even on this website, given his long list of crimes?
You zoomed in on his mugshot. Was it wrong to find him attractive despite his record? He truly embodied the term “bad boy,” though he didn’t look like a boy at all. He was ruggedly handsome with hollowed eyes. His light-mink hair was swept back, with a few strands falling over his forehead, and he wore a single hoop earring in his left ear. Black tattoos marked his nose bridge, jaw, and the centre of his forehead, while narrow-eyed designs were inked on his cheekbones.
You wondered if he’d get any letters, given his long rap sheet. Maybe delusional women like you, who’s pussies sang for high-profile criminals, sure.
Licking your lower lip, you picked up a piece of paper and a pen, tapping the end against the sheet as you continued to study his face.
Then you started writing.
Hello, Sukuna Ryomen,
My name is Y/N.
You thought it over. For now, you'd keep it light before diving into your deeper issues. It felt easier to share your thoughts with someone you’d never meet face-to-face than with a stranger in a bar whose only interest was getting into your pants.
You kept writing.
Dear Sukuna Ryomen,
I’m currently living in an apartment complex that’s in desperate need of renovation. I’m harvesting cockroaches—no, I’m not eating them; the fuckers just won’t stop nesting in my kitchen cabinets, and I’m tired of spending money on pest sprays. On top of that, I’m pretty broke, barely managing to keep a roof over my head. I’ve even considered trying to seduce the landlord into reducing my rent, though I doubt any man would find a woman with one working eye appealing. I noticed you have an extra beneath your real eyes. Care to share?
Anyway, this is my first time writing to someone like you, so apologies if it’s a bit awkward. I wish I could send a nude, but I’m pretty sure you’d wish you were blind after that. I feel like I’m rambling like this is my diary, so I should probably wrap it up. If you want to write back, feel free. I don’t mean to sound privileged, but I’m lonely as fuck.
Thank you (?),
Y/N
P.S. About the Satanism—care to explain?
You didn’t bother proof-reading and folded the letter into an envelope, sealing it with a lick. From your drawer, you pulled out a pack of old stickers—remnants of your childhood—and placed one where the envelope met. You wrote the prison address provided on the website and added the stamps you’d bought during your walk, which was your final push into becoming a prison pen-pal. After selecting Sukuna Ryomen on the site and uploading your ID and other required documents, you waited for your profile to be approved.
After three days of waiting, you sent out the letter first thing in the morning and anxiously awaited a response.
Sukuna’s fists collided with the inmate’s face, each strike more brutal than the last. Blood splattered across his knuckles as the crowd of orange-clad convicts roared with twisted delight, their voices a chorus of vile encouragement. “Finish him!” they taunted, while others jeered at the barely conscious man, urging him to get up and fight back, to aim a desperate kick at Sukuna’s balls.
“Sukuna!” A guard’s voice cut through the chaos, and soon the officers were pushing through the throng, shutting the prisoners who dared resist their authority. “Get up, now!”
“Fuck off!” Sukuna snarled, his lips curling into a sneer as he shoved the guard aside. He watched with cold satisfaction as the man lay still, blood pooling beneath him. All this because the idiot had the nerve to laugh when Sukuna missed a three-pointer. Now, the bald bastard had paid the price for his arrogance, and Sukuna breathed in the aftermath—his own dark victory painted in blood and broken bones.
Officer Gojo Satoru strode into the circle, handcuffs gleaming in his hand.
Sukuna's eyes narrowed at the sight of the blue-eyed bastard, a wave of hatred surging through him so fierce he could almost feel his fingers tightening around Satoru's throat. The very thought of choking the life out of him fueled his dark desires.
Satoru’s father—the man responsible for dragging Sukuna down, catching him red-handed with crates of cocaine at the border, and sealing his fate with a fifty-year sentence. If Sukuna had known the old man’s spawn would end up as a deputy officer here, watching his every move with those piercing eyes, he would have never shown up to that cursed delivery. But no—he had wanted to play the good boss, personally seeing his precious cargo off. Now, every day behind bars was a constant reminder of that one fatal mistake, and Sukuna’s rage festered as he thought of the traitor, Yuji. The little fuck who sold him out would pay dearly, and Sukuna was already plotting the perfect revenge.
His own fucking nephew sold him off. Motherfucker wanted the throne for himself—an empire Sukuna built with his bare hands.
“Throw him in the ice box,” Satoru commanded, his voice dripping with that infuriating smugness. The officer roughly cuffed Sukuna’s wrists, shoving him forward. “Cool down, Big Guy. You’re not going any—”
Before he could finish, Sukuna rammed his forehead into Gojo’s nose, relishing the satisfying crunch as the lanky bastard staggered back. The inmates roared with approval from where they were restrained by the other officers.
Gojo chuckled, dabbing at his bleeding nose with a pristine handkerchief, the kind only a spoiled little bitch like him would carry. “You think that’s funny?” he asked, his tone laced with condescension.
“Hilarious,” Sukuna whispered, a dark grin curling at his lips.
“Okay,” Gojo replied with a casual shrug. Without warning, his fist slammed into Sukuna’s jaw.
Once.
Twice.
Three fucking times.
The officers stood by, indifferent, as their captain unleashed his fury. For them, it was just another case of self-defence.
Sukuna finally collapsed to the ground, his vision swimming. Gojo leaned over him, his voice a venomous hiss. “Who’s laughing now?” A final, vicious kick to Sukuna’s chest left him gasping for breath. “Keep him in that freezer until he’s begging to be let out. No meals for a week.”
Sukuna’s vision blurred as he glared at Satoru’s retreating figure, the ringing in his ears barely drowning out the disappointed murmurs of his fellow inmates. His body, battered and beaten, finally surrendered to the encroaching darkness.
When he came to, he found himself in the prison’s infirmary, cocooned in three heated blankets. Yet the warmth did little to pierce the deep, bone-chilling cold that gripped him. The need to piss gnawed at him, but even that seemed distant compared to the icy numbness that had taken hold.
“Welcome back to hell.”
Sukuna raised his head from the pillows to find Uraume, the prison’s doctor. They were also the only person he tolerated, and somewhat close to since he ended up in the infirmary more than once. He hoped they considered him a ‘something’ after he killed a two-hundred pound guy for groping their ass in the cafeteria. How did he do it? He knew Uraume kept a pocket knife in their doctor’s coat and quickly swept it out and stuck it in the dick’s jugular.
“How long have I been out for?” he asked, squirming his arm out of the blanket to rub his eyes.
“A day.”
“What?” Sukuna pulled himself out of the blanket by wiggling around like the fucking worms his cell mate Toji liked to collect every time they went in the courtyard to play. They’re better company than your grouchy ass, he said once. “How long was I in the ice box?”
“Barely an hour.” Well, that’s just pussy behaviour from him. “They pulled you out before hypothermia killed you. What a way to die, am I right?” They chuckled, preparing some pills in a small disposable cup. “Here, take these. They’re nutrients.”
“I could use actual food.” Sukuna downed them like a shot. God, he missed alcohol. “That blue-eyed bitch restricted my meals for a week.”
“Fuck him.” Uraume took out a sandwich from their bag and threw it in Sukuna’s direction. “Just fake illness when you’re hungry. I’m always here to feed my favourite dog.”
Sukuna snorted. “Go to hell.”
“Already here.” Uraume clipped back their white hair with the back dyed red. Like someone smashed their head into the wall and the colour just bled to the sides. “Oh, this came for you.”
Sukuna shoved the sandwich in his mouth and stretched his muscles before walking over, snatching the letter. It was already opened, a flimsy teddy-bear sticker hanging from the paper. “What the fuck is this?”
“A letter.”
“A letter? For me?”
Uraume broke their attention from the computer to look at him. “Remember when you had me register you on that prison pen-pal bullshit after Toji received a pile of fan letters?”
Sukuna blinked.
He definitely remembered being jealous when Toji got a letter from an artist who drew herself naked on paper for him, and a shit ton more asking for his dick size or when he’ll be out. Of course, Sukuna was envious of the attention. Plus, no one in prison made good company. He just wanted the taste of the outside world again after being locked in for five years now. Even if it was through ink on paper.
But then Sukuna looked down at his first ever letter torn open. “Why is this open? Who read it?” If it was Satoru, he was going to rip his eyeballs from his sockets and feed it to Toji’s pet worm.
“Relax. They’ve got to identify if there’s any substances attached to the paper, or any other shady shit. Whoever wrote to you is just a harmless nobody.”
Sukuna frowned, bringing the letter up to his nose. It smelled like a plain envelope. No drugs, nothing.
He found purchase on the bed again, pulling out the folded paper and ironing the creases out on his leg. Here we go.
He began reading each word carefully.
A week went by since you’d mailed your letter to Sukuna Ryomen. A week of pure torture to hear something back from the criminal. You’d relaxed on Sunday because the post offices are closed, but on Monday, you were at your mailbox, watching the mailman sort out letters and slip them through the boxes.
Once he left, you dashed to your box and flipped through the coupons, flyers, newsletters—
Your breath hitched.
Everything dropped from your hand except the cream envelope with an address from the prison. You didn’t care about reading it upstairs and quickly, yet carefully, tore it open from the side, reading the writing.
Trying to read it.
Sukuna had terrible handwriting. It made you giggle.
You leaned against the mailboxes and murmured the words written under your breath.
Hey, Y/N
I don’t know how to start a letter since I’ve never written one so don’t mind if I hurt your little feelings. Don’t know if you’re aiming to entertain me or bore me to death with this “dear diary” bullshit. I thought I’d get a nude, at the very least. Hell, Toji over here—yeah, the bastard who was on the news last year with a thing for setting houses on fire—gets way better fan mail every week. Pictures, drawings, mostly nudes. And I get your whining about rent and cockroaches?
Look, I may be locked up, but I’m giving you some advice here. Don’t fuck your landlord. You’ve got one eye? Good—use it. Hell, that’s already intimidating enough. Threaten the prick to call pest control, or better yet, trap those damn cockroaches and give him a taste. Stuff a few down his throat if he still doesn’t take you seriously. People respect action, not whining.
Speaking of. One eye? Really? Now, how’d it happen? Was it torn out? Still got some sight in it, or is it just gone? That’s gangster. Hot, even. I’d fuck a one-eyed chick. Maybe when I’m out we can cross that off my bucket list. Nah, I’m just playing with you.
Or maybe I’m not.
Think on it.
Hate (in a friendly way),
Sukuna.
P.S. Yeah, I took out some satanist scum who tried kidnapping one of my people’s kids. But don’t go thinking I’m in with those freaks. I’m just the Devil they wish they could be.
“Woah,” you breathed out, hugging the letter to your chest. This was it. This was what you were waiting for. A pull towards something real, something thrilling. It’s all you’ve been craving for eons now.
“Whatcha got there, sweetie?” The voice snapped you back, harsh as nails against glass. Your landlord had wandered out of his door on the first floor, wrapped in a faded bathrobe and gripping his mug like some king holding court. “Made a mess on my floor with your papers.”
“Sorry,” you muttered, quickly tucking Sukuna’s letter back into its envelope and reaching down to gather the stray papers scattered on the floor. When you straightened, he was already in your space, close enough that the coffee on his breath made you flinch.
“Excuse me—”
“You’re excused.” His smirk widened as he leaned in, his nose grazing your neck. The greasy warmth of his breath made bile rise to the back of your throat. “Just wanna take a little bite out of you.”
Sukuna’s advice echoed in your mind. You’d never—never—think of following through with his revolting insinuation. But letting this sleaze get away with treating you like this? No. Not anymore.
“Step away,” you commanded. “Now.”
He blinked, then chuckled, dismissive. “Feisty today, huh? Got a letter from your boyfriend in prison, sweetie?” How did he know that? Fuck. Did he go through your mail before it was deposited? “Let me guess—you think he’s got your back now?” He leaned even closer, the stench of his laugh wafting in the air. “Come on, where's that one eye of yours aiming, sweetheart?”
“Next person who mentions my eye eats the dirt,” you snapped, every ounce of your resolve boiling up. “And as for what I’ve got—it’s something way out of your league, old geezer. So get the hell back to your apartment, and call pest control now.”
For a second, he was stunned, face going pale as your words sank in. But you could feel Sukuna’s thrill, his twisted approval in the back of your mind. You’d tapped into something that wouldn’t settle. But then, “Well, I’ll be damned. Someone put on their big girl panties.”
Your jaw tightened as you held your ground, taking small breaths. You’d rehearsed this moment in your head, picturing a confrontation that ended with him backing down. But things never went as planned with him.
“I’m not here to beg,” you said evenly. “But I’m not gonna let you walk all over me, either. I pay rent. It’s your responsibility to keep this place livable.”
He snorted, raising his coffee mug and giving you a once-over that made your skin crawl.
“Not for free, sweetheart. You’ve gotta give me something worth my time.” His eyes travelled down your body.
Your pulse throbbed in your ears, but you squared your shoulders. “I’m already paying rent. It’s your right to ensure your tenant's safety.”
His face darkened, lips curling into a bitter smile. “Not when that tenant’s acting like a spoiled little bitch.” And then, with a flick of his wrist, he launched the mug’s contents right at you.
You dodged, but a few hot droplets scorched your arm, leaving a raw sting that only fueled your anger. He laughed, shaking his head with a mocking scowl. “Get the fuck out of my sight before I kick you out on the streets.”
You didn’t give him the satisfaction of seeing you cry. You turned on your heel, heading back upstairs with quick steps, forcing the tears back until you could lock the door behind you. Once inside, you slumped to the floor, breathing hard. The letter from Sukuna crackled beneath your hands, and you clutched it close to your chest, feeling the heat of humiliation turn into something fiercer, darker.
“Damn it,” you whispered to yourself, pushing back to your feet with renewed energy. You marched to your desk, grabbed your notebook and pen, and let the words pour out, hurried and jagged. If anyone would understand this kind of anger, it was him—the one man whose entire life was carved from rage.
And this time, you wouldn’t hold anything back.
“Letter for you, Ryomen.”
Sukuna dropped down from his top bunk, snatching the letter right out of the guard’s hand.
“From your girl?” Toji asked from across the table, flipping a card, halfway to beating Sukuna in Blackjack.
“Not my girl,” Sukuna grunted, tearing into the envelope. But still, he smirked as he unfolded your letter.
Hey, Sukuna.
Fuck my landlord to hell and back. I need you to know I’d kill him if I could get away with it. I’m trying to keep this “ethical” so they don’t cut off my letters, but let’s just, I hate the elderly. They should be rotting in retirement houses instead of owning properties and doing a shit job running them. That senile asshole threw hot coffee at me this morning. Burning. I nearly shattered the damn mug over his skull.
Sukuna’s eyes narrowed, his fingers squeezing the letter hard enough to crumple the edges.
And now he’s saying he’ll kick me out, as if I have anything to pay him with. This place is a dump, anyway. I might hit up one of those shelters for women, maybe hop from couch to couch for a bit. My job at corner store’s giving me scraps; it’s not nearly enough to get by. So yeah, you could say I’m screwed.
And to answer your question about my eye—yeah, I’m blind in it. Got it from a real piece of work I used to call a boyfriend. He decided my face was fair game, and thought I could just live with it. But he's dead now. Overdosed last I heard from his brother. Good riddance, am I right?
Oh, and for that kink of yours you mentioned—sending my picture along with a little extra treat.
Hate (because I’m about to go crazy here), Y/N
P.S. For all the things you’ve done, I can’t lie—the world you talk about sounds safer than this one. Well, except for you committing the most heinous crimes.
Toji clicked his tongue. “Look at that dumbass grin on your face.”
“Shut the fuck up,” Sukuna muttered, flipping the letter over—and there it was: a stick drawing of a woman lying on a bed, two messy circles for her chest, legs spread wide, and what looked like . . . well, he didn’t need to guess. Sukuna went from grinning to outright laughing. “She’s hilarious.”
“Not just that. She’s sexy as fuck,” Toji said, holding up a photo, ripped clean in half.
Sukuna’s eyes flashed. He swiped the photo and pieced it back together, cursing himself for tearing through the envelope like a brute. But as the two halves reconnected, he felt his pulse kick up, hard.
“Well, shit.” You were more than just beautiful. The way your hair fell, the curves of your body wrapped in that short black dress, standing under a streetlamp with the city lights glinting around you . . . But it was the smile—the easy, teasing grin—that really did it for him. “I’m definitely jerking off tonight.” Respectfully, of course.
“Can we get back to the game now, or—”
“Fuck the game. I’ve got a letter to write.” And a plan brewing to get you out of that dump and right where he wanted you.
Your landlord was pronounced dead.
An ambulance had arrived early in the morning, around nine, waking up every tenant. You were one of them, groggy from your sleep, and all the crying you’d done from realising how high rent was these days.
Apparently, he had a heart-attack, said one of the residents.
He was eighty, said another.
You stuck to the back of the crowd as his body was wheeled out on the stretcher. How could he have died just five days after you sent your last letter to Sukuna? It couldn’t have been him, could it? Maybe one of his associates? Given the man’s extensive criminal history, you suspected he had some serious connections.
As the crowd began to disperse a few minutes later, you joined them but didn’t head upstairs. Instead, you made your way to the mailroom.
And luckily, Sukuna’s letter was present.
All he wrote was:
You’re welcome.
Neutral,
Sukuna.
You broke out laughing, or crying. Whatever it was, it felt good. So good.
Hey, Sukuna!
These days, I’m feeling calm. Really calm. I’m sleeping well, eating better, even starting to enjoy work. Sometimes, I’m scared it’ll all get snatched away. By who? I don’t know. Life’s been that way, though. I’ve lost so much—my parents, my friends, even my left eyesight. At one point, I lost my will to keep going. But I guess some part of me held on, believing a better day would come.
Turns out, those days are here. Who would’ve thought a felon could make me feel less alone? I know it sounds crazy, but my life’s been full of surprises lately.
If you think you can’t bring happiness to someone, I’m here to tell you you’re wrong. I’m genuinely happy, and it’s thanks to you. I already think of you as a friend—and I hope you think of me the same way. You don’t get a choice in that, by the way.
Love (genuinely), Y/N
P.S. I’d like to come visit you sometime soon.
Sukuna lowered the letter, his eyes settling on the wall where he’d pinned up your picture. “Toji?” he called out, still staring at the photo.
Toji paused mid-pushup, raising an eyebrow. “What, bitch?”
Sukuna let out a low laugh, barely shaking his head as he spoke. “I think I’m in love.”
Hello, Y/N.
When I’m out in fifty years, I’ll give you a real surprise. And don’t write me any more of that sentimental crap, alright? Save it for when you visit. I’d rather hear it in person.
Hate (but maybe not so much), Sukuna
P.S. You’re beautiful.
You pressed the letter to your chest, biting your lip as warmth spread across your cheeks, your face aching from how much you were smiling. It was official—you were falling for Sukuna Ryomen. You’d have to look your absolute best for your visit. Just the thought of seeing him, hearing his voice, maybe even feeling his hand brush yours, made your heart race. You’d kiss him if they’d let you. And if they didn’t? What could the guards do? Throw you in jail? Now that would be ironic.
But fifty years . . . Would you really wait fifty years for Sukuna to be released? How high was his bail, anyway, that even his hidden cash stash wasn’t enough to cover it? He had to have some kind of pull with the right people, didn’t he?
With a sigh, you grabbed a piece of paper and began to write your reply.
Sukuna,
Fifty years is a lifetime, don’t you think?
Love, Y/N
Sukuna read the short note you’d sent, surprised by how much you’d poured into just a few lines. He noticed small, faded dots on the paper—tears, unmistakably yours. You’d been crying, and it didn’t sit right with him. His stomach tightened, but thankfully, he’d already secured your visit through Uraume, who handled it while Gojo was away.
Now, all that was left was seeing you.
He wondered how he’d keep his hands to himself after all the nights he’d spent memorising your picture, losing himself in thoughts of you. Every night before sleep, every morning when he woke, every time Toji was out cold and couldn’t hear Sukuna’s barely-stifled groans as he imagined you were there. God, he wanted to steal you away.
The day of your visit finally came. Sukuna was led to the visitor room, wrists cuffed, flanked by two guards. He hadn’t set foot in this room since a couple of his associates had visited months back with updates on the family business and Yuji’s latest fiascos. They’d kept everything running despite his brother’s mess-ups, and Sukuna owed them.
He glanced down at his hands. Fifty years. He’d been scheming for a way out since he first set foot in here, but now, with you in the picture, the urge to escape was relentless. Bail was twenty million. Even if he could scrounge it up, he doubted he could get it done without tipping off the wrong people. No, his only real option was breaking out.
“Sukuna.”
A soft voice pulled his head up slowly. He couldn’t remember the last time his name was spoken with such warmth.
“Y/N.”
He shot up from his seat, his eyes flicking to the guards stationed in the corner before letting himself drink you in. You looked stunning—a soft sundress, hair delicately curled, makeup enhancing every curve and angle of your face. His gaze lingered on your eyes, marvelling at the contrast: one foggy, hazy, while the other was bright and striking. A smirk pulled at his mouth, but he softened it for you.
“Hey,” he whispered, the one word holding more emotion than he’d ever admit, especially with witnesses around.
“Hi,” you whispered back, eyes lowering down his muscled body, the pattern tattoos like rings around his wrist and with the first three buttons of his jumpsuit unbuttoned, you found the top of the rings on his pecs as well. His light-pink hair was brushed down, the tendrils poking his reddish-brown eyes. A peculiar colour. “Hi.”
He smiled. “You already said that, baby.”
Baby. Gosh, you were even more nervous now.
“They said I can’t shake your hand.” You looked at the cuffs on his wrists and tossed a glare at the guards. “Or hands.”
“Fuck them.” Sukuna sat down and you followed. “You’re stunning.”
You blushed. “Thank you.”
“Not gonna compliment me back?” His deep voice was cocky, smug. You loved it.
“You’re handsome and you know it.”
“I sure do.”
You chuckled and Sukuna watched you with a soft expression. “Thanks for . . . you know.”
He understood the words you mouthed and smiled. “A little Ricin never hurt anyone.”
“How did you pull it off?”
His eyebrow arched in surprise. “Just because I’m stuck in this hellhole doesn’t mean I’ve lost everyone’s respect out there. Blood is thicker than water in my clan—except when it comes to my nephew. I just want to drain it out of him.”
Your own smile faltered. “Well . . . I’d like to have coffee with you. But fifty years, Sukuna, is too long.”
He sighed. “I know.”
“Isn’t there any way to get you out?”
Sukuna saw the longing on your face and wanted nothing more than to hold it in his hands and stare at you for hours. He just couldn’t believe you were real. He would’ve killed you if you were cat-fishing him. “I really want to touch you,” he whispered instead. He did. He really fucking did.
You pinched your lips in a smile. “Me, too.”
Sukuna placed his hands on the table and grabbed both of yours. They were so soft and small. He wanted to kiss each finger. Knuckle. Vein.
“Hands off, Ryomen,” the guard warned. He didn’t relent, and simply winked at you. “I said hands off.”
“Fuck you,” Sukuna spat back.
“Visit’s over.” The pair of guards pried Sukuna away, making you reach out for him with a protest.
“I’ll see you this weekend.” Sukuna winked and let the guards drag him away.
You sat stunned before the officers escorted you out of the visiting room and apologised on his behalf.
When the weekend finally rolled around, you found yourself standing at the prison gates once more, entering alongside a pair of guards.
Waiting by the visitor room was a towering figure with straight silver hair and striking blue-eyes. You got a closer look at the badge—Satoru Gojo. You’ve read the name in one of Sukuna’s letters complaining about him.
“Y/N. What a pleasant surprise,” he greeted, waving away the guards and pressing a hand on your back, leading you down the opposite direction.
“We can chat another time, officer. I’ve got to meet Suku—”
“He can wait. Prison teaches a man patience. He’s got fifty more years left. Plenty to visit then.” Gojo opened the door and guided you inside. The shutting made your shoulders flinch. The lock clicking had dread pooling in your stomach. “Sit. Would you like anything to drink?”
You eyed the dark setting bathed in a golden light from a corner lamp. There was a cart with a decanter set and a mini-fridge to the right. A bookshelf and a wardrobe on the left. “I’m fine, thank you.”
Gojo shrugged and poured himself whiskey before taking his seat behind his table. You sat opposite him. “So, what’s your relationship with my favourite prisoner?”
You blinked. “Uh, we’re just pen-pals.”
“Lying to a police officer is a serious offence.”
“I’m telling the truth,” you said. “We’re strictly pen-pals.”
“I’ve read your letters to know that isn’t true, Princess. So unless you want to sit there and lie to my fucking face, I suggest you start using that mouth for good and tell me the goddamn truth.” He slammed his glass down, but his face remained smiling with false politeness.
You felt suffocated in the office, eyes darting left and right for anything sharp in case he tried some other method to get you to talk.
“I’ve been in this field for a decade now to know when someone is hiding something from me,” Gojo continued, taking a leisure sip from his drink. “I have a file on you, Y/N. You’re an only child, with no proper education or a stable job. You’re one bad decision away from being trafficked. You’re submissive, a follower, who if went missing, no one would look for.” Tears welled your eyes at his words. “And I know that bastard’s the reason you’re still living in that dump you call home.”
That was the last nail in the coffin.
“I’ve been following you since your first letter,” he said quietly. “You think I don’t know what you’re up to? Oh, Princess, you couldn’t be any more wrong.” He stood up and rounded his way to you.
You quickly scrambled out of your seat. “Please. I don’t know anything. I—I don’t—Sukuna’s a friend, yes, but I’m not involved in any of his criminal activities.”
“Friend?” Gojo spat out. “That man is the last person you’d ever want as your friend.” He stalked forward and you retracted. “He’s committed more crimes in his lifetime than any other man. He’s killed half the people in this country, extorted money from politicians, burned down houses for fun, and killed my father!” He grabbed the collars of your dress and slammed you back into his wardrobe door. A cry ripped from your throat. “And you, a nobody, has the audacity to call that fucker a friend? Sweetheart, you’re just a ploy, a pawn, a time-pass for him. A hole to warm his cock in.” A sardonic chuckle. “That’ll never happen since he isn’t getting out anytime soon. But, hey, maybe I can prepare you for him.”
Your breath quickened, a whimper slipping past your lips. “How does that make you any better than him?”
Gojo smiled and brushed his lips over your ears. “Because I have the power to get away with it.”
Your eyes, frightened and flickering, dragged up to his blue-ones.
In the blink of an eye, you slapped him across the face, taking him by complete surprise and broke free from his hands. He leaped towards you as you unlocked the door and ran out and down the hall, shouting for help.
A pair of officers turned the corner.
“Help, please!” You fell into the arms of one of them. “Please, he’s going to hurt me!”
“Who?” one asked with concern.
“Satoru Gojo!”
They exchanged a look and briskly turned away, leaving you standing. Their spines straightened as Gojo walked down the hallway, flattening a hand down his chest. The duo saluted him and walked away with their heads down.
Your heart sank.
You had no power here.
“I told you, Princess,” Gojo purred, prowling towards you, “this is my domain.”
You cried out and ran towards the visitor’s room. The door knob was locked and could only be opened with a keycard. “Help!” You slammed your palms on the surface. “Please, someone! Help—ah!”
Gojo gripped the back of your hair and pulled you from the door. “Perfect timing, actually. I’d like to see the look on Ryomen’s face before I split his woman on my cock.” He swiped the card and opened the door, pushing you inside but controlling you with the grip he had on your head.
Sukuna was already standing and enraged, held back by two guards who struggled. He must’ve heard your helpless cries. You wish he didn’t have to. “Let her go, Gojo!”
“Oh, I will,” said Gojo, “as soon as I’m done with her.”
Sukuna growled, thrashing against his restraints. “You fucking prick, I’m gonna tear you in half if you touch her!”
“Like this?” Gojo squeezed your left breast and laughed.
Sukuna elbowed one of the guards in his nose, momentarily seeking freedom to hit the other. Hope blossomed in your chest as he fought them off and made his way towards you.
Gojo chuckled and pulled out his gun, shooting Sukuna in the leg. You jumped with a scream as he fell to the floor, clutching his thigh. “All this chaos for a common whore,” he muttered. “Come on, Princess. Let’s put you to good use.”
“No, please!” You shouted as he dragged you away. “Sukuna, no! Sukuna!”
“Y/N.” Sukuna reached his arm out, his hand curling into a fist and falling defeatedly onto the floor. “Don’t hurt her, please.” His face was squeezed in pain, as the guards kept him pinned to the floor. “Please! Don’t fucking hurt her—”
The door closed shut, and the last sight before your eyes was Sukuna crying.
Sukuna hadn’t heard from you in over a month.
He’d also spend the month in the infirmary after Uraume did an extensive surgery on his leg. It hadn’t hit a vital artery. He believed Satoru’s aim was calculated to keep him alive. To continue letting him suffer.
Sukuna also went quiet. He hadn’t spoken a single word to anyone except murmuring to himself. He read back on your letters, slept with the papers under his pillow, if he slept at all.
Every morning, afternoon, night, in and out of his dry sleep, he was plotting a way to get out of this hell and find you. Would you even want to see him? Would you even care? Were you even alive? He’d dragged you into his mess, put you in danger, and fell into Satoru’s disgusting trap.
“You need to eat something, Sukuna,” Uraume advised as they have been since his injury. They placed the tray in front of him. “At least eat the yogurt.”
Were you eating? Were you still living in his house? Were you alive? That question rang in his head again.
“For fucks sake.” Uraume brought forth a stool and sat next to his bed, staring at the side of his face. “What the hell do you want to do?”
He wanted to kill Satoru first. Then escape with Toji since he was the only bastard he trusted in this place. Then find you and run away from the law as far as possible. It was a simple plan that required efficiency.
“Are you gonna talk—”
Sukuna shoved the tray aside, the food falling onto the floor. He was irritated by the questions outside and inside of his head. “I need to find her,” he mumbled to himself. “I need to know if she’s alive.” Please, baby, please be alive.
“Everything all right in here, doc?” One of the guards stationed outside the door asked with his head peering through the door.
Sukuna stared at him, then went back to Uraume. They met his eyes with their blank stare. They scanned down his body, to his injured leg, then back to his head.
A sigh left them. “No,” they replied. “Do you mind helping me clean up the mess?”
Sukuna gritted his jaw as the guard walked in, closing the door and crouching down, grumbling curses at Sukuna. Uraume stood from their stool and made their way to the cabinet, pulling out a syringe and a small vial.
Sukuna's eyes lightened, spine straightening. A smile curved at his lip as they flicked the droplets from the tip of the injection and walked over, making small-talk about the weather.
Suddenly, Uraume jabbed the needle into the officer’s neck and pushed down the plunger. He fell to his side, clutching his neck and staring up at them as they shrugged. Sukuna watched with pure delight as his body began to convulse, foam gathering at this mouth and dripping from the side.
Then he stopped.
“He’s dead,” Uraume said before Sukuna could ask. “Works the night shift so you won’t have a problem running into anyone else. Change into his clothes. I’ll drive.” They walked away to grab a face mask.
“Why?” asked Sukuna.
Uraume sighed, head dropping. “Because I fucking hate it here.”
Sukuna was definitely going to hire them once he killed his Gojo, and his nephew.
He quickly changed into the officer’s clothes, giving him a hard kick in the stomach that had Uraume rolling their eyes.
Sukuna followed behind as they led the way. “Let’s take Toji.”
“Why?” they asked. “That’s a hassle.”
“Just feel bad.”
“And when did you start feeling guilt?” Uraume easily slipped past the security gate, waving to the officer who was busy on his phone.
“I don’t know,” he said, smiling because he knew. Sure, you’d only touched him once, but your letters were what truly began to change him. Just the other day, he’d lost a round of blackjack, stacking his debt to Toji by a million, and instead of knocking the guy out cold, Sukuna shook hands and called it a ‘good game.’ “On second thought, let’s leave him here for the time being.” Until he got his money in check.
Once they settled into Uraume’s car, Sukuna quickly discarded the officer's cap, tie, and badges. Uraume entered your address from the letters, and they drove in silence for the next thirty minutes.
When they arrived, the building matched your description: shitty.
Uraume stopped Sukuna before he could leap out of the car. They scanned the street for any signs of police presence. “Go. I’ll wait here.”
Sukuna nodded and dashed out of the car, walking inside the apartment. There was no buzzer system, which meant anyone could stroll in, armed and dangerous. This was a problem. He needed to get you out of here and into one of his safe houses—a hidden place even his bastard nephew didn’t know about.
He hurried up the emergency stairwell to the tenth floor, slightly winded by the time he reached door 1090.
This was it.
With his hands gripping the edges of the door, he hunched forward, heart racing. Please, be alive.
Finally, he knocked.
He chewed the shit out of his bottom lip, hissing impatiently through his teeth. “Come on, Y/N.” He knocked again, his impatience boiling over. ���It’s me, Sukuna! Please, open the door.” He pounded harder, fear creeping in with each passing second. The Sukuna Ryomen was . . . scared. “Goddammit!”
“Sukuna . . .?”
He halted mid-breakdown and turned slowly, his heart dropping at the sight of you standing there with two bags of groceries. You looked so fragile, your complexion pale, and the radiance he remembered from your visit had completely vanished.
The grocery bags slipped from your hands and fell to the ground.
In an instant, you both rushed toward each other, and he lifted you off the ground effortlessly. You wrapped your arms around him, sobbing uncontrollably as he buried his hand in the back of your hair, inhaling the comforting scent of your body wash.
“It’s okay, baby,” he whispered. “It’s okay, I’m here.” His eyes were directed straight ahead, and he was shaking. Terribly. “I’m here, sweetheart.”
You pulled back, cradling his face in your small hands. Gently, you brushed aside his dark, mink-like hair, tracing the tattoos on his skin with your fingertips. “You’re alive,” you whispered, overwhelmed by relief. You couldn’t help but touch him, and he simply smiled, allowing you the closeness. “God, you’re alive. Sukuna—you’re really alive. How?”
“Of course, I am. I just needed to know you were alive,” he replied, his hands enveloping your cheeks. “Where did you go? Why did you stop writing to me?”
Your face went blank. “What do you mean?”
“Your letters. You stopped writing to me.”
“They . . .” Your voice cracked. “They told me you were sentenced to death.”
He was taken back. “What the fuck?”
Realisation dawned upon you. The second time you visited Sukuna, Satoru had literally dragged you out of the station, kicking you out the doors. He’d threatened to take you to his office next time, but since he had a meeting with officials that day, he’d reluctantly let you go. That didn’t stop you from sending countless letters, pouring your heart out until, two weeks later, you finally received a notification from the police station. Sukuna had been sentenced to death by lethal injection and was no longer alive. You’d cried for days on end. You imagined he had been cremated and reduced to ashes, stored away somewhere. The thought shattered you. For an entire month, you couldn’t bring yourself to leave your house.
Until tonight.
And he was here. Sukuna was here. He was alive.
“Y/N,” he murmured, his thumb gently brushing the area below your sightless eye. “Let’s head inside, alright?”
You nodded, pressing a soft kiss to the underside of his wrist. He held your hand tightly while using his other arm to carry your grocery bags. Once you reached your apartment, you opened the door and locked it securely. The deadbolt you had installed was a precaution against Satoru, just in case he showed up.
“I’m so happy you’re al—”
Sukuna kissed you before the words could leave your mouth. You wrapped your arms around his neck, moaning from the taste of his lips, the taste you’d been craving for months now. He didn’t allow you to breathe, didn’t pull away. You both stood there in the alcove, kissing for minutes, clinging to each other. He cupped the back of your head and drew apart from your lips, peppering kisses over your face, especially your foggy eye.
“I don’t want to fuck you, baby,” he whispered in your ear. “I want to make love to you. For hours.” Your grip tightened in his shirt. “Then I need you to pack everything in a bag and run away with me.”
“Run away?” You searched his dark-reddish eyes. “Run away where?”
His knuckles grazed your wet cheek. “Somewhere not even God can find us.”
You swallowed hard. “They’ll send out a manhunt, Sukuna. What if we get caught? What if they take you—”
He cut you off with a kiss. “No one is going to take me away from you. Do you get that?” His strong fingers moved through your hair. “I’d turn this world to dust before that happens.”
Your insides melted from the threat. “Take me,” you murmured over his lips. He kissed you. “Take me everywhere, anywhere, wherever, as long as it’s with you.”
Sukuna lifted you effortlessly, carrying you like a bride as he kicked open your bedroom door. He set you down on the bed, then began stripping off his clothes, revealing the geometric tattoos that marked his thighs and torso. You were caught off guard by how quickly he moved, fumbling to take off your sweater and jeans. By the time you looked back at him, he was already naked, and your gaze dropped to what you could only describe as a gloriously, long erection.
“Woah,” you whispered, feeling your mouth go dry. “You’re abnormally big.”
“You can take it.” He leaned over you, tearing your panties without a second thought. Before you could protest about them being your favorite pair, he spread your legs and went down on you. “Oh, my god—Sukuna—wait—”
“Waited too long,” he growled, his mouth finding your clit as he buried his nose between your wet folds. He nipped, licked, and bit, his tongue plunging deep into you, creating messy sounds that filled the air. You couldn't form words or catch your breath, gripping the roots of his hair tightly.
When you came like a flood, Sukuna lifted your hips, making sure not a single drop of you was lost to the sheets. He let out loud, deep moans as he sloppily lapped at your sensitive cunt.
He wiped his glistening mouth with his fingers and then pressed them against your lips. You eagerly sucked on his warm, thick digits, noting the lustrous glint in his eyes. He pulled his fingers out abruptly. “Suck my cock.”
Suck his what?
You looked down and saw him leaking at the tip. You clenched your legs, unsure. He wanted you to take that into your mouth?
You licked your lips, managing to kneel while he stood before you. He took hold of himself, rubbing the tip against your lips. You instinctively flicked your tongue out to taste him, causing him to flinch. “Sorry���”
“Don’t apologize.” He seemed to enjoy it. “Just take it in your mouth.”
You nodded, wrapping your fingers around his hot, veiny length. You opened your jaw as wide as you could and slowly took him in. His head fell back, and he engulfed your face with his palms. Your performance was mediocre, and yet he was entertained.
His tip pressed against the back of your throat, making you pull back to cough. He laughed softly, brushing your cheek with his hand.
“Come on, baby. You need to get used to it.”
“I’ve never done this before,” you replied, your voice shaky as you reached for him again.
“Stick your tongue out.”
You took a deep breath and extended your tongue. He rested the head of his cock on it and started to move his hips slowly.
Slowly, you took him in, feeling his satisfaction as he gently rocked his hips back and forth. He tasted warm and a little salty, and you found your hand wandering between your legs, seeking some relief.
“I’m going to pick up the pace, alright, baby?”
You nodded in response.
“Don’t be embarrassed if you choke,” he said, hooking a stray lock behind your ear. “It’ll just make me come faster.”
With that, he thrust deeper, and you gripped his hips tightly, struggling to catch your breath. He noticed and pulled back slightly to give you a moment, but it was brief before he pushed back in again. “You’re taking me so well, baby. Fuck.” His movements became more feverish, and you felt the pressure building as you choked and gagged, saliva escaping at the corners of your mouth. “Fuck, I’m gonna come. I’m gonna come down your throat.”
You tapped his leg, shaking your head.
“No?” He smirked. “You don’t want me to come down your throat?”
You shook your head again and pointed between your legs.
In an instant, Sukuna pulled out. He flipped you onto your chest, lifting your ass up in the air. Without a second thought, he thrust himself deep inside you, and you cried out his name into the pillow.
He felt so full, so thick, pushing into you with a force that made your breath hitch. It was everything you needed—so good, so fucking good. “Fuck, you’re tight,” he groaned. He filled you completely, driving into you with a fast rhythm that left you moaning, completely lost in the pleasure.
Your nails clawed at the sheets as his thick tip pressed against your womb, punctuated by the stinging slaps of his hands against your ass. He showered you with a blend of sweet and dirty words—“good fucking girl,” “cock slut,” “so perfect and tight,” “little whore”—and you pushed back, needing him deeper and deeper.
Sukuna released a torrent of warm cum inside you, still driving his hips against you, holding you securely by the waist. The sensation sent waves of pleasure through you, and he pulled out, flipping you onto your back. He bent your knees, driving himself back inside without hesitation. How was he still so hard?
Your hands cupped his flushed, beautiful face, a lazy smile stretching across both your lips. Sukuna leaned in, kissing you deeply before trailing his lips down to your neck while his hand found its way to your breast. “I’m not on birth control anymore, you know?”
“Good.” He pulled back to meet your gaze. “And don’t even think about getting back on it.”
“But we can’t afford the risk, Suku—”
“I love you,” he said, his grip firm on your jaw. Everything inside you exploded. “I love you, baby. I love you so fucking much that I’ll take every fucking risk.”
You moaned softly as he came again, your trembling fingers brushing against his lips. “I love you, too.” He kissed your fingertips, a promise in every touch. “I’ll take every risk with you.”
“Fuck yeah you will.” He didn’t pull out, his eyes locked on yours. “Starting with putting a baby in you.”
You happily accepted your fate.
Sukuna pulled the trigger, shooting another police officer in the back of his head. The sound of the gunfire mixed with the blaring sirens, echoing through the flickering lights of the corridors—a devious melody composed just for him. He chuckled low, the corners of his mouth pulling up in a grin as another officer lunged out, attempting to stop him—pathetic. A single shot rang out, and the man crumpled like paper.
The path to Satoru’s office was a long one, and the bodies he left sprawled out in his wake were only a brief distraction from the task at hand. He had things to do today, after all.
Another officer stumbled into view, eyes wide, panic evident. He didn’t stand a chance. Sukuna barely glanced at him as he fired, stepping over the man as he slumped against the wall. Blood splattered his shoes, but it was hardly the worst stain on his day.
You were going to be pissed. He could practically hear the biting tone, the disappointed scowl that’d meet him the moment he finally made it to Mai’s first birthday party. Sukuna scoffed as he shot a bullet straight through a door that dared open near him, knocking down yet another obstacle.
But this was necessary. He needed to do this.
Free Toji. Kill Gojo. And then, eventually, deal with his meddling nephew. Everything would finally align, and maybe—just maybe—he could stop all this. For you. For your daughter.
Satoru’s office was close now. He could smell the antiseptic scent of the door, the false air of authority that seemed to reek from it. He cocked his gun, steeling himself. Because when he was done here—when he’d finally finished what he’d started—he’d make it up to you.
Or so he told himself, as another officer charged and met the floor with a hole in his skull.
Sukuna didn’t bother with the doorknob. He slammed his boot into the door, sending it splintering inward with a loud crack. The office was stripped bare; Satoru’s usual pile of clutter, the irritating stench of his cologne—gone. Only the dust of where things once sat remained on the shelves and desk.
The bastard had fled.
Sukuna’s jaw clenched as he surveyed the room. Gojo knew he was coming and had bolted like a coward hours ago. He pulled his lighter from his pocket, flipping it open with a flick of his thumb, the small flame dancing aglow. Without a second thought, he stepped to the heavy, pretentious curtains Gojo insisted on, pressing the flame to the thick fabric. It caught quickly, embers licking up and curling black around the edges as the fire took hold, consuming Satoru’s last pathetic hold on this place.
He turned and walked out, ignoring the smoke that was already billowing into the hall. The prison alarm was still blaring, red lights flashing down the cold corridors as he made his way to the cells. Every so often, he’d pause, assessing the prisoner cowering behind bars. Rapists, pedophiles, molesters, abusers, killers of innocent lives—he moved on from them. But when he found those who didn’t quite repulse him, he took a single shot at their lock, releasing them in a stream of confused, wary freedom.
As he approached the far end of the corridor, a familiar sight greeted him—his old cell. And standing behind those hard, metal bars, arms crossed, a faint smirk tugging at his lips, was Toji.
“Didn’t think you’d come back to this hellhole,” Toji remarked.
“Not for long,” Sukuna replied, levelling his gun at the lock. He fired once, the lock shattering as the cell door swung open.
Toji stepped out of his cell, took one look around, then paused. “Hold up.”
Sukuna raised an eyebrow, watching as the man crouched beside a loose brick in the wall. With a wry smile, he pulled out an old, scratched-up plastic bottle with a wriggling, sickly-looking worm inside. He tapped the side of the bottle, making the creature twist and writhe. “Almost forgot my little friend here.”
Sukuna barked a short laugh. “You’re out of your damn mind.”
Alarms blared louder as they navigated the winding corridors and ran past prisoners surging toward freedom. Some guards tried to block the path, but they were quickly swept aside by Sukuna’s bullets and Toji’s fists. By the time they hit the outer gates, the entire prison was pandemonium, prisoners scattering into the open like ants from a burning nest.
Outside, a sleek, black car idled just past the gate. Uraume sat coolly behind the wheel, watching the stampede of convicts with bored detachment. As they approached, Uraume rolled down the window, glancing at them with their nose slightly crinkled.
“I could smell you two from a mile away,” they said dryly, eyes flicking to the stains of blood on their clothes. “Maybe next time, schedule a prison massacre that doesn’t fall on your daughter’s birthday?”
“Just drive,” Sukuna replied, sliding into the backseat with Toji following. Toji glanced at Uraume with a quick nod, still keeping a light hold on his bottle, the worm twisting inside.
“Welcome back to the real world, Fushiguro,” they said, starting the car as they drove off into the night.
The road stretched long and dark, winding into the depths of a thick forest. The further they drove, the thicker the trees became, their branches curving overhead to cast everything in shadows. The road narrowed into a rugged trail, overgrown and wild. Uraume navigated it deftly, until at last, the forest opened up, and they could see the soft glimmer of moonlight on the water beyond.
Perched on the edge of a cliff overlooking the ocean stood their safe house—a dark brick estate against the endless stretch of water. Waves crashed against the rocks far below, the scent of salt and sea heavy in the air.
Sukuna looked at the house, then at Toji’s surprised face.
“This is where you’ve been hiding for the two years?” he asked as soon as they were out of the car.
“Not for long if I fuck this up.” Sukuna slipped in through the garage, keeping his steps light. He had just one goal at this moment: reach the shower before you spotted the blood streaked on his clothes and the smell of gunpowder clinging to him.
But as he shut the door, there you were, arms crossed, eyes sharp as they landed on him.
“Sukuna,” you started, an edge in your tone that he recognized all too well. “Do you have any idea what day it is? Look at you; you're a mess!” You gestured at the dark stains on his shirt and his unmistakable smirk.
Instead of trying to dodge the lecture, he listened, that faint smile tugging at his lips as he watched you, soaking in each scolding word. You were the one person who never held back with him, and it made something dangerous in him soften, something in him settle. “I know, baby,” he replied, pecking your cheek. “But I’m here now, aren’t I?”
“Barely,” you replied, sighing, though you couldn’t quite hide the relief in your voice. You glanced over his shoulder. “Toji, Uraume—it’s good to see you both.”
Uraume gave a slight bow, a wry smile still tugging at their lips, while Toji just gave you a quick nod.
You waved a hand, turning back to the kitchen. “Both of you boys—shower, now. I won’t have the two of you smelling like a prison while I’m trying to decorate my daughter’s cake. Go on!”
Toji gave Sukuna a knowing look and shrugged, as if to say, She’s right. Sukuna shot him a warning look, then followed up the stairs, chuckling under his breath as he imagined how you’d cornered him like this.
Fifteen minutes later, he stepped out of the shower, cleaned up, feeling far lighter as he tugged on a fresh shirt and came downstairs, catching the scent of the dinner you’d prepared.
He walked over to you, wrapping his arms around you and pressing a kiss to your temple. You rolled your eyes but couldn’t hide the small smile that melted your anger as he pulled you close.
“Gojo got away,” he murmured. “He knew I was coming, and he ran like the coward he is. But I’ll find him. And I’ll make him pay for what he did to you. I swear it.”
You paused, looking up into his eyes, your hand settling on his cheek. “I know you will, Sukuna. But don’t miss the important things here. We’re what’s important now, not just revenge.”
The words took root in him, grounding him, but that flicker of rage still danced in his eyes. He pulled you close, pressing his forehead to yours. “I’ll never let him touch us again. I promise you that.”
Just as you leaned in for another kiss, Sukuna heard the faint sound of your daughter stirring awake from her nap on the living room floor. Mai’s soft little whimpers broke the room’s quiet. Instinctively, he abandoned your kiss, his attention snapping to her as he practically floated over to where she was squirming in her pink dress, rubbing her tiny fists over her eyes.
“There’s my girl,” he murmured, scooping her up with all the gentleness he could muster. Her sleepy eyes blinked open, and he was rewarded with that toothy little grin she’d recently mastered, one that brought an uncharacteristic softness to his entire face. He pressed a cascade of kisses on her cheeks, nose, forehead—anywhere he could reach. “Look at you, sweetheart. All dressed up for your birthday, huh? The prettiest girl in the world.”
You laughed softly from the kitchen, watching as Sukuna held her close, stepping into an impromptu waltz around the living room, his steps surprisingly skilled. She squealed in delight, her small hands reaching up to his face as he spun her around. Even Toji, who had just come down from the shower, stopped in his tracks at the sight, a rare, amused smile tugging at his mouth.
Sukuna glanced up, catching Toji’s presence, and with a proud smirk said, “Toji, meet my daughter, Mai. She’s already got more spirit than most of the people you and I have met.”
Toji stepped forward, studying your daughter. He reached out a hand, and she looked at him with wide eyes, inspecting him with her natural, innocent curiosity. “She looks like trouble. Must take after her old man.”
“Her mother, mostly,” Sukuna said in your direction, bouncing her lightly. “She’s going to have a whole world to handle, with us around.”
In the background, Uraume was setting the table, their usual precision in each movement. They threw Sukuna a blank look, brushing off their hands. “Now that the table’s set, if you’d all just take your seats, maybe we can have a peaceful birthday dinner without the talk of blood and violence for once.”
Sukuna chuckled, shooting them a dry look before turning back to his daughter. Holding Mai close, he took a seat at the head of the table with you beside him. He looked around, taking in the sight—the cake you’d just set down, the quiet chatter as Uraume and Toji exchanged comments, and his daughter babbling in his lap, still pawing at his face with sticky fingers.
For the first time in as long as he could remember, he felt peace.
The “Happy Birthday” song had been sung, candles blown out, cake shared, and Toji had crashed in the guest room, completely knocked out. Uraume, too, was resting in another room, finally allowing herself a few hours of sleep.
In your bed, the soft rise and fall of your daughter’s tiny breaths filled the space between you and Sukuna. She slept peacefully between you both, tiny fingers curled into fists as she dreamed. But you and Sukuna were both wide awake, eyes locked on each other in the moonlight. His hand drifted up, fingertips brushing your cheek.
“Do you remember my first letter?” you asked.
A smirk began at his lips. “You mean the diary entry about the cockroaches in your kitchen and how you thought seducing your landlord was a better solution than paying rent?”
You laughed, covering your mouth to keep quiet, not wanting to wake your baby. He loved that laugh—the way it sounded like music only he got to hear.
“Or how no one with one functioning eye could ever be taken seriously romantically,” he added. “Debunked, by the way.”
Your laugh softened, and you looked at him with a smile that held a thousand memories. “Do you remember the last thing I wrote?”
“The part about Satanism?”
You laughed again, the sound bubbling up and melting into the dark. And as he listened, he couldn’t help but chuckle alongside, his thumb tracing along your cheek, taking in the moment like he was trying to memorise it.
You took a breath, glancing down before meeting his eyes again. “I said I was lonely as hell, remember?” Sadness wove into your words. “And . . . I was. Back then, I thought no one could ever really understand me. Until you did.”
Sukuna shook his head. “You were never meant to be alone, baby,” he murmured. “Not then, not ever. Not while I’m here.”
You swallowed, heart catching as you looked at the life you’d built, the fragile happiness that now lay nestled between you both. “I’m just . . . scared sometimes,” you admitted. “I’m scared of losing this. Of losing you. I don’t know if I could protect what we have.”
“We’ll protect it together,” Sukuna affirmed. “Nothing will take this from us. Not while I’m still breathing.” He leaned forward, his lips meeting yours in a kiss that was deep, reassuring, exactly like the one he’d give you when you’d sealed your vows. When he pulled back, you met his eyes, a soft smile tugging at your mouth.
“I love you, Sukuna,” you whispered, fingers brushing his sharp jaw. “Genuinely, your wife.”
He took them and gave a kiss to the tips. “And I love you most, baby. Genuinely, your husband.”
Moments later, your eyes drifted shut, your breathing evening out as you finally slipped into sleep. But Sukuna stayed awake, his gaze never leaving you, or your daughter.
This was the family he’d fought and bled for, the life he’d killed to create. And yet, an unsettling undercurrent of unfinished business tugged at his nerves. But tonight, he forced it away, just for a while.
For now, there was no room for anything but the second chance he’d been given.
Genuinely, by you.
#zaraswriting#sukuna ryoumen x reader#sukuna ryomen#sukuna x reader#sukuna imagine#sukuna x female reader#sukuna smut#jujutsu kaisen x female reader#sukuna x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen imagines#jjk imagines#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk x you#jjk x female reader#ryomen sukuna#sukuna x y/n
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Do you ever just stop for a second and take stock of where you are at in that particular moment? Because while writing the latest chapter of Here’s To Us, I came to the realization that I’m writing a crossover fanfic between my oldest and my latest fandoms, while drinking a white claw, after finding out about the Tuff Puppy/Danny Phantom crossover because Kitty Catwell was listed as an alley of Jazz’s, all while wearing a maid outfit I found in the back of my closet as Sk8er Boi plays softly in the background. I have no idea what brought me here, but as is life I guess.
#small life update i guess?#i've started writing the next chapter of here's to us and i like how it's started out so far#i'm hoping to updated a little quicker this time around now that the initial info dump is out of the way#no promises tho#i was cursed with fanfic author syndrome and need to get some testing on my heart lol#i'm fine but my doctor disagrees
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Why does she give a damn about me? | Spencer Reid x Reader
cutesy, cheesy fluff
In wich Spencer thinks reader is out of his league but she could not be more into him.
Content: Garcia is a queen as always, sunshine!reader
Warnings: Maybe some light lack of self steem from spence, but nothing crazy!!
He was used to it at this point. Being the weird kid in high school and college, Spencer never really expected anyone to be into him and, after being rejected a couple of times, he had practically closed himself off in that sense. But then, you came into the picture.
You are one of those girls that everyone seemed to gravitate toward, not only because of your beauty but because of your essence. You were genuinely kind, smart and good with people in a way he wished he was, maybe that’s why he was so drawn to you, you had all the qualities he wished he had and being close to you made him feel complete.
Needless to say that he was in love with you, it had started as an admiration and when he realized he was thinking about you all the time, but he was sure you would never be into guys like him, he was sure you’d never see him as more than friends.
–
You had joined the team a few years ago, you were excited to finally be doing what you really wanted when you joined the BAU, going out in the field and being on cases instead of just working a desk job all the time. When you first met the team, everyone seemed very welcoming but you felt yourself especially drawn to Spencer out of all people, at first he seemed distant but with time you noticed how sweet he was and how much he cared for everyone around him and god that man was so funny, you loved his weird science jokes and his magic tricks. How were you supposed to not fall in love with him? You asked yourself that question every time he brought you coffee in the morning or went on his rambles about some random thing.
After a particularly intense inquiry from a very drunk Garcia in one of the girls' nights she organized at her home, you told her your feelings for Reid and she made you swear you would act on it.
“Garcia, I'm not confessing. He's not into me like that, i’ll just ruin our friendship”
“Oh honey, he practically kisses the floor you walk in, he follows you around the office like a lost puppy and practically kills any officer that dares to be the tiniest bit mean to you. There’s no way he’s not into you, at least try pretty please” She says, doing puppy eyes at you. Garcia took her job as a cupid very seriously and was not going to let this be her first fail.
“Alright, i’ll try but if he ends up hating me you’ll have to bake me cookies everyday until i die” You say rolling your eyes and finishing your glass of wine.
“Ohhh i’ll be cooking cookies for you guys wedding!”
–
So, here you are holding his favorite order from the local coffee shop and gathering the courage to press the button to the elevator
“Hey are you fine?” A familiar voice calls you, when you turn around its spencer.. Great, guess you’ll have to do this right now
“Oh hi yeah, I was just um… meditating”
“Did you know meditanting has been proven to increase your memory and is also great for reducing anxiety. I really should start doing it, what method do you use?” Spencer says while pressing the button to the elevator
“Ummm breath in, breath out i think” You say, unsure how to respond
“That's actually one of the best ways as it oxygenates your brain and helps it work better, it can also help you feel more calm since deep breathing activates the parasympathetic nervous system that sends a signal to your brain to tell the anxious part that you're safe and don't need to use the fight, flight response” He says, doing the little smile and head nod thing he always does after info dumping.
You smile back at him, as you both enter the elevator and press the button to the BAU floor.
“I brought you something” You say, handing him the coffee shop bag
He opens it and smiles at you “I can’t believe you remembered my favorites, thank you so much” You love that smile so much, all you can think about is how perfect he is and how there’s no way you can continue on without dating this man.
“Actually, I need to tell you something spence… I was thinking, maybe we could go out together as like, a date or something” You say, already blushing from the embarrassment you felt and how scared you were that he did not reciprocate the feelings.
“Really? Of course i want, to be honest i’ve wanted to ask you to be honest but i thought you’d never see me like that”
“Are you kidding me spencer? I’ve had a crush on you since we first meet”
The elevator gets to the office, and you both walk in blushing and joking about how you two were so blind to each other's feelings. As you get in, garcia passes by you two stopping to stare
“There’s something happening here…” She says, pointing between you two and pressing her eyes together as if she’s profiling you two
“I asked him out”
“Oh my god finally, you see? I’m always right, I don’t even need to ask what he said, look at Reid, he’s glowing, ohh i’m so happy” She says, walking out to probably tell the news to everyone on the team.
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid x you#spencer reid x bestfriend!reader#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x y/n#criminal minds#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid x reader fluff#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid x self insert
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Start wearing dresses?
The other person gave some good practical advice on *getting* those dresses, so like my thing would be: don't make the mistake of thinking fashion is uncomfortable.
I have a reputation for being overdressed (in the fancy not warm way), and that's because some of the most comfortable AND accessible (I'm disabled) clothes I have are slinky cocktail dresses and the least uncomfortable hairstyle is a lowkey fancy bun-twist thing.
If you hate to wear it, you won't wear it. If it takes too long to put on, you won't.
If the fit pinches or pulls it'll look wrong anyway so you gain nothing shoving yourself into something too tight or for the aesthetic.
That includes sizing on main. Remember female clothing sizes are made up lies so don't pay attention to the number on the tag, try lots of different numbers of the same style, focus on what actually fits.
Clothing shopping is a place where should needs to die. Don't settle, keep looking until it feels as good to wear as it looks because it'll look as bad as it feels after an hour but if it looks good it'll make you feel amazing as well as comfortable.
someone explain to me step by step how to go from being like, the PREMIER jeans and sweatshirts girl in my town to dressing like Amy Lee from American gothic rock band Evanescence
#like if you need advice on how to look at racks of clothing to access what will look good on you or something I can gotchu too#it's... it's just too broad a question; I don't really know what you're actually asking#and I've been yelled at for dumping about the wrong info too many times to just guess#but like I identify with that one post about asking reddit for a script on how to order at subway so if that's your need I'm your not-Girl#we just need to nail down more focused tedtalk topics first :-D
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Questions I Ask My Beta Readers
"Did you like it?" just doesn't cut it when you're trying to get useful feedback, so here's some questions that get your reader really thinking about your work:
What are your general impressions after reading? How did you feel when the book ended?
(For fantasy/sci-fi) What did you find most confusing about the world? What did you find the most interesting? What do you want to know more about?
Were there any scenes that broke your suspension of disbelief? Which ones? Why?
Which chapters were the hardest to get through? Did you find yourself skimming the text at any point in the story?
Which character was your favorite? Which was your least favorite? Why? (Note that this question is best when asking multiple readers. If one person really dislikes a character, it could be personal preference. If multiple people can't stand a character for the same reason.... well, that's a problem you need to fix. Unless, of course, you want your readers to hate that character. Just make sure that their hatred enhances the reading experience instead of ruining it).
Did you get any characters confused or mixed up? If so, did this make the story hard to follow?
What was the most suspenseful moment in the book? What was your favorite moment of the story? What was your least favorite moment in the story? Why?
Which setting in the book was clearest to you as you were reading it? Which setting was the most difficult to envision?
Did you feel there was a lot of info dumping at any point? If so, where?
How do you feel about the plot? Were there any parts that confused you or seemed nonsensical/ illogical?
Did you feel any part of the story was predictable? Do you have any predictions for the next book(s)? If so, what are they? (Again, another question that's best when asking multiple readers. Be aware of your audience here. Some people, especially those who read a lot, are really good at predicting where stories are going to go. If those people are able to guess what happens next, that might actually be a good thing, because it could indicate that your story is progressing logically. Too much predictability is a problem, but a little isn't bad. This question is just to make sure the plot twists/progression aren't painfully obvious to most readers).
What plot holes did you find in the story so far?
Were you invested in the story? If so, at what point did you become invested? Did you lose this interest at any point? (The second point here is really good for determining whether you have a slow beginning. Sometimes readers might really like your story overall, but would not have gotten past the first few chapters if they were reading it for fun instead of as a favor for you. This happened to me last time I asked someone to read my work, and it made it clear how much of the beginning I needed to rewrite entirely).
Any other questions or comments?
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Only Choice
Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!cop!reader
Summary: You and Tim go undercover to catch a serial killer because you're the only choice.
Warnings: angst?, fluff, r wears a two-piece bathing suit and like halfway wears Tim's shirt, Tim and r makeout on the job (again)
Word Count: 2.4k+ words
Inspired by T-Shirt by Thomas Rhett.
Masterlist Directory | Tim Bradford Masterlist | Request Info
“Hey, gorgeous,” Angela greets as she enters the bullpen. “We need to talk.”
Tim sighs as he squeezes his eyes closed. “Lopez, I’m not in the mood today.”
“Who says I was talking to you?”
Tim looks up, his brows pinched. When he sees Angela smiling at something to his right, he turns his head to follow her eyeline.
“Me?” you ask, pointing to yourself as your eyes widen.
“Yep,” Angela answers. “Wade and I need to see you in his office. You, too, Tim.”
“You said you weren’t talking to me,” Tim argues as he stands.
“I wasn’t. Now I am. So, Tim…” She looks at you and enunciates, “Gorgeous, you’re both with me.”
“Okay,” you agree slowly. “But Lucy owes me $50. Don’t let me forget that.”
“For what?” Tim inquires.
“I bet her 50 that Lopez doesn’t know my name. The gorgeous thing feels like conformation.”
Tim grunts under his breath, but inside, he’s not entirely convinced that’s the reason. Angela is incredibly kind and funny, but she doesn’t usually say stuff like that just because she forgot someone’s name. Officer, sure, but gorgeous has to have more behind it.
“I thought you were friends,” Tim points out as he opens the door to Grey’s office for you.
You shake your head and murmur, “Not yet.”
“What do you know?” Wade asks as the door closes behind Tim.
“Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell,” you joke.
Tim sighs, lays his hands on his belt, and counters, “Know about what?”
“The serial killer,” Angela answers. “Targeting attractive couples in LA county.”
Tim shakes his head, so Angela turns toward you.
“Uh, just that he’s killing couples who are supposed to be traveling and then dumping them in Angeles Forest. Right?”
“Precisely. He’s nearly impossible to find, though.”
“Meaning we have no idea where to look,” Grey fills in. “Without knowing when or how he works, we’re steps behind him.”
“So, you want to set a trap,” Tim guesses. “Use UCs to lure him in for another kill.”
“You’re so smart, Timothy,” Angela applauds sarcastically.
“Lopez.”
“You in?” Wade interjects.
“Wait, what?” you reply. “You want to send us in as the UCs?”
Tim shakes his head as you point between the two of you. Angela nods, and you purse your lips to consider it.
“Why not?” you decide with a smile. “I’m in.”
“Does it have to be us?” Tim inquires.
“Uh…” Wade pauses to look out of his office and around the station before he says, “Yeah.”
“Only choice,” Angela agrees.
“Gorgeous,” you whisper.
“And smart,” Angela applauds. “He’s got a type. Pretty couples. And… you fit.”
“Tim, she called you pretty, say thank you,” Grey teases.
“I didn’t say yes,” Tim argues.
“Is Aaron still here?” you ask.
“I didn’t say no either,” Tim interrupts, raising a hand to stop you.
You press your lips together and lift your hands in apology. Angela is trying to contain a laugh at Tim’s offended reaction to you asking about another man who could pretend to be your significant other. You’re not a couple, but Angela was right when she said you’re the only choice. If the killer is planning to kill again, he won’t be able to resist you and Tim together.
“Where are we going?” Tim asks with a dramatic sigh.
“Santa Monica,” Angela answers with a smile. “Pack your swimsuit.”
“Is it going to be this awkward the whole time?” you ask as Tim drives to the luxury hotel.
“No,” he answers shortly. “Just…”
“You’d rather be anywhere else?”
“Tell me your cover story,” Tim instructs, changing the subject. “Stop talking like a cop.”
You sit back in your seat and look out the window, catching glimpses of the ocean between the beachfront buildings as you recite the information Angela created for you.
“And we’ve been together for just over a year,” you continue. “I even got my nails done because I think you’re proposing this weekend, but I’m not supposed to tell you that.”
“Good,” Tim murmurs.
“Tim,” you begin again, your tone more serious as you look at his profile. “I’m sorry for pushing. I know this is weird.”
Tim shrugs. “Anticipated my next proposal would look a little different.”
“Ow,” you hiss, playfully rubbing your chest over your heart. “Oh well, at least Angela thinks I’m gorgeous.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah, but I like messing with you.”
Tim rolls his eyes, but you see the tiny smile he tries to hide. You’re here for work, but at least the view is nice. Oh, yeah, the ocean’s pretty too.
After adjusting the straps over your shoulders, you step out of the bathroom and back into your oversized luxury suite (courtesy of the LAPD and a need to get a serial killer behind bars).
“You’re in a bathing suit,” Tim says as he enters the bedroom, slowing as he looks at you.
“Great observation, Bradford,” you reply. “Did you forget why we’re here?”
Tim shakes his head and turns away from you. “I’m just saying… you could’ve worn a one piece,” he murmurs.
“Spoken like a man,” you tease as you pull a coverup over your head. “Try using the bathroom in one of those and then tell me that again, Tim.”
“Guy at the bar has been staring at us since we walked in,” you inform Tim over the rim of your glass.
“Us or you?” he asks, discreetly glancing over your shoulder.
“What’s the difference?”
“It’s a simple question. Men stare at beautiful women, especially at the beach. If he’s interested in you, just because, he’s not our guy.”
You try to ignore how your heart rate speeds when Tim calls you beautiful, but it affects you.
By the end of the day, you’ve noticed two men who checked in after you seem to be hanging around wherever you and Tim are. It could be a lead, or it could be a coincidence. You can only hope you learn which before it’s too late.
“I’m surprised you’re making progress so quickly,” Angela says over the phone the following morning.
“I told you,” Wade says in the background.
“Anyway,” Angela begins again. “How’s Tim? Tolerable?”
Tim is looking directly at you, and though he can’t hear Angela, you still feel like he’s caught you talking about him.
“The usual,” you answer.
“Remember why you’re there, okay? Keep us updated. We’ve got officers everywhere.”
“Thanks, Angela.”
You end the call and sit down on the couch beside Tim. It’s more exhausting than you thought, the hustle and bustle of pretending to be an in-love couple that does everything together. You’ve already been to the pool, the beach, three restaurants, and the hotel lounge and cruised down the PCH.
Leaning your head against Tim’s shoulder, you look over the balcony railing and to the water, reflecting the first rays of sunlight peeking over the beachfront high-rises.
“Are they running the men from yesterday?” Tim inquires, making no move to create space between you.
“One of them checked out this morning. The other came back clean and his reservation was booked weeks ago,” you respond. “Back to square one.”
“You sound surprised that catching a serial killer in a place this big didn’t happen overnight.”
“Because it’s us!” you point out. “I thought we’d break some sort of record and have the cuffs on him, be back in our own beds already.”
Tim smiles and stretches his arm out behind your head. Another full day awaits you, but you’d be content to spend it here.
“Don’t turn around,” Tim instructs as you prepare to leave the upscale diner he found for breakfast.
You nod, complying as he leans forward to wave for the check. He looks across the restaurant as he sits back in the booth.
“I saw a guy by the pool last night. He looked over a few times, but that didn’t stand out then. He was still at the pool when we left the lounge,” Tim explains.
“And now he’s here?”
Tim nods. “He fits the profile. White, mid-30s, completely unimposing.”
“What do you want to do?”
Tim smiles and takes your hand as he answers, “I want to catch him.”
You both know that two sightings aren’t enough to arrest him, so take a good look at him as you walk to the bathroom and then leave to continue your plans for the day. Everywhere you go, you and Tim are on high alert, noting where he is or isn’t, what he’s doing, what he’s wearing, and anything else you may need to know if this is the killer you’re searching for.
“Wait, Tim,” you call, pulling him to a stop in the hotel lobby. “He’s never been in the hotel. He wasn’t inside last night, and we’ve been back three times. I don’t think he’s staying here.”
“Or he just thinks we’re coming right back out. He can’t lose us if he doesn’t leave the door,” Tim points out.
“Maybe,” you murmur.
“We should test it, though. He watched us from the pool last night. If he was staying here, why didn’t he just come in where he could see better, hear us?”
“How do you want to do this?”
“We could try to lure him in.”
You smile as another idea strikes. “Or we ask Angela to get us a room at a crappy motel.”
“Why?”
“Because no one thinks twice about who’s walking around. The rooms are practically public, he could follow us straight to the door.”
Tim smiles as he pulls you closer, playing the part of the perfect boyfriend. He makes it seem effortless.
“Let’s get out of here, baby,” he murmurs against your ear.
“He’s following us,” you whisper as you walk down the beach, nearing your new, faded-aqua motel.
“Metro’s waiting in the employee parking lot. Your call,” Tim replies, pulling you closer.
You stop, keeping Tim close before you loop your arms over his shoulders. Leaning up, you brush your lips over Tim’s jawline.
“We’re gonna have to put on a show,” you murmur against his skin.
Tim drops his head toward your shoulder and whispers, “Then let’s make it memorable.”
“Keep it down!” someone calls from a doorway.
You laugh against Tim’s mouth as he lifts you onto the next step. He holds you against his chest while he steers you backward toward the door. When you reach your room, you lean against the door, and Tim drops his head to kiss you.
“We really need to stop doing this,” you whisper.
“Absolutely,” Tim agrees, leaning in for another kiss.
He scrapes the key across the door, trying to unlock it while keeping his attention on you. You reach down, steadying his wrist as you kiss down to his jaw. The lock clicks and Tim bends to hook his arm under your hips before he pushes the door open. Kicking it closed behind him, Tim takes you inside and leaves the door unlocked.
“Take your shirt off,” you instruct as you pull your coverup over your head.
“Why?” Tim asks, already unbuttoning the linen button-down as you wait in your bathing suit.
You shake your head and turn on the outdated TV set before you walk to Tim’s side. Once his shirt is off, you slide it onto your shoulders and haphazardly button it.
“Lopez, get ready,” you say into your wire, still attached to the inside seam of your coverup.
Flipping your hair, you mess it up before raking your fingers through Tim’s. He watches you, unable to decide what he wants to see more: your hair messed up, how you move in front of the TV light, or how you look in his shirt. Before he can decide, someone knocks on the door.
You pull your gun from under the bed and ready it on the door as Tim stands against the wall, prepared to cut the shooter off before he gets all the way into the room.
“LAPD!” the Metro team outside yells. “Put your hands up!”
Three minutes and one gunshot later, the motel is quiet. The door opens, and Wade follows Angela inside, their eyes drifting between you, Tim and the suspicious outfit changes that have occurred.
“Ready to go?” Angela asks.
Tim looks at you, hesitating, before you answer, “Yeah.”
Standing behind a police car, still clad in your bathing suit and Tim’s shirt, you wait for Angela to join you.
“Anything you want to tell me?” she asks. “Friend to friend?”
“Do you even know my name?” you argue.
She says your name in answer, then leans against the back of the shop.
You exhale as you prepare to ask, “Why me and Tim? You could’ve picked anyone.”
“The truth? You were the obvious choice. We needed an attractive couple. But… you were also making the rest of us tired.”
“Tired?”
“The constant pining. The longing looks. It got kind of sickening. So, when the case popped up, I thought maybe it would give you a reason to deal with those feelings, however you wanted to do that.”
“It was a good plan,” you admit softly. “Except now I’m even more confused than before.”
“You want a ride?” Tim asks you, approaching the side of the shop you’re behind.
You look at Angela, and she nods enthusiastically. After you agree, you follow Tim to a car and wonder if this is the best or worst night of your life.
“I thought you said we needed to stop doing this,” you say against Tim’s lips.
He chuckles as he pulls back. “Then why are you leaning in for one more?”
You roll your eyes and hit the light switch beside you. At least he waited until we got inside this time.
“It really was the only choice, you know.”
“I do,” Tim agrees. “But I will make Lopez pay for meddling.”
“Sure. I for one am just glad we’re finally acknowledging that we have feelings for each other.”
Tim smiles as he takes your hand. “Maybe I can forgive her for tonight.”
“Maybe you can also cook dinner tonight.” You lead Tim to your kitchen, release his hand, and walk down your hall to change.
Not that an outfit change will erase the vision of you wearing Tim’s shirt from his head anytime soon. No matter what, you’re both thankful for Angela’s meddling, because it took you exactly where you wanted to be.
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