#i guess I wish I'd be a man just to dress as a woman or something 😭

[eryanlainfa]

Slowly realising I'm projecting on a character again and I'd like to do drag..

[agender-witchery]

On Project Moon

Hey, this is gonna be long, I'm putting most of it under the cut. This post is about the recent firing of VellMori from Project Moon, I know that it warrants some tags for triggers, but I have no idea what's commonly used, so if I miss something, please tell me.

Additionally, I have written this up in a way that if it escapes the target audience of Project Moon fans, it can still be understood, so with that in mind, there will be Library of Ruina spoilers.

The tl;dr for those who don't wanna read the full thing is that Project Moon was put in a very bad position with some violent extremists targeting them and that I'm not happy about any of what happened.

So, for those unaware, Project Moon has fired VellMori, the CG artist for Limbus Company. Now, a not inaccurate statement that can be made from this is "Project Moon fired a woman for being a feminist" but this is... somewhat reductive. Let's immediately get out of the way that VellMori did absolutely nothing wrong. Some people have said she is a TERF. I've seen no evidence of this. Some people have said she wished death on all men. I've seen no evidence of this.

What I HAVE seen is that VellMori thinks sexual abuse is bad. Now, why would this lead to a firing? The short answer is that a bunch of violent incels, one of which was literally dressed as a clown, came knocking at their office doors.

See, Limbus Company has a "beach" event coming up. In this event, we are getting a water themed outfit for two of the characters, one male and one female. For Sinclair, the guy, he has been given an EXTREMELY slutty mechanic's outfit. For Ishmael, the woman, she has been given a very skintight wet suit outfit. Now, I wanna take care to note that VellMori is the CG artist - she had no hand in these designs, a man made them. I would also like to mention that both outfit designs are amazing, and I will be including them at the end of this post for reference.

Now, upon revealing the wet suit design for Ishmael, a bunch of whiny incels on what is basically Korean 4chan got upset that Ishmael, instead of being in a bikini as is usual for gacha games, was wearing a wet suit. Nevermind that the designs in Limbus Company have always been conservative and that the Sinclair design is the most skin we've ever seen and it's just an open shirt. Again, the wet suit is still super revealing, it's skin tight and this is literally the first design of her that doesn't make her look flat chested. They're not rioting over the lack of sex appeal, they're specifically mad that it's not a bikini.

The incels come to the conclusion that the lack of any skin being shown on Ishmael's outfit is a result of evil feminism. No, I'm not exaggerating. They initially begin harassing the artist who is actually responsible for drawing the outfits, but upon learning that he is a man, set their sights on VellMori because she's a woman, and being an artist is good enough I guess. What they do from here is they start digging and digging and digging on VellMori's twitter, making use of archived pages because many of the "offensive" tweets had been deleted.

I'd like to take a moment to point out that VellMori never actually tweeted anything out here - it was all retweets from a 4-6 year old archive, and retweets that have been long deleted. These retweets contain such transgressive statements as "I'm sick of misogyny" and "If being against patriarchy makes me antisocial, then so be it" and just... mirroring back to men what those men were saying to women. Some people would like to have you think she was calling for death to all men. She wasn't. She ALSO retweeted all this stuff while she was a teenager and well before she worked for Project Moon.

Nonetheless, the incels had decided that feminism was the reason Ishmael had a wet suit and not a bikini and they had found a feminist working for Project Moon. It is at this point that we must take a brief detour and talk about Library of Ruina, Project Moon's previous game.

See, in Library of Ruina, one of the protagonists, Angela, has this whole arc about escaping her abuser and becoming a human. Yes, she is literally a robot, but Project Moon isn't exactly a stranger to symbolism in their stories and a feminist reading of Angela is ridiculously easy. The main antagonist in Library of Ruina is Argalia, the Blue Reverberation, and his crew is called the Reverberation Ensemble. Every member of the Reverberation Ensemble is a violent lunatic who each want to reinforce the status quo in their own unique shitty way. In addition to this, typically in order to reach the titular Library, you would need to be invited. The Reverb Ensemble are the "uninvited guests", the ones who managed to reach the Library and knock down the door without an invite.

Why am I talking about this? Well, the incels decided to start calling themselves the Reverb Ensemble, and referring to each other using names of the Reverb Ensemble members such as Pluto, Elena, and Oswald. Having taken on the moniker of the uninvited guests, they then showed up to Project Moon's office to protest. Over the lack of a bikini. Now, remember how I mentioned someone was dressed up as a clown? One of the Reverb Ensemble members, Oswald, is a clown with an extremely tenuous grip on reality. So much so, that his ideal world is one in which there is no meaning whatsoever. That is the character they chose to dress up as. This is either a case of extreme self awareness or extreme self unawareness.

Eventually, the incels were let into the office possibly as a form of damage mitigation to prevent the crowd of protestors from getting any bigger. This was a questionable decision, but they had a group of violent incels at their doorstep either way, and I don't exactly have full details on this. Regardless, Project Moon had on their hands a group of violent protesting incels, who they felt compelled to let into the building, and who had demands including the firing of their feminist employee. (7/28 update: a translation of the transcript posted to DCInside has surfaced. Please check the reblogs for it. Project Moon was verifiably threatened.)

So while "Project Moon fired a woman for being a feminist" isn't inaccurate it also isn't the full picture. More appropriately, it'd be "Project Moon fired a woman because a group of violent incels who weren't satisfied with a form fitting wet suit instead of a bikini showed up to their office demanding that an artist who did not make the wet suit design be fired because she retweeted some feminist stuff 5 years ago while she was a teenager".

I'm not happy with this. None of this is good. People are allowed to be feminists, and Project Moon stories have always presented progressive ideas to anyone with half a brain to do some basic literary analysis. I can understand why they would cave to the demands of people who were threatening them and showed up to their actual place of work, but at the same time, that's someone's livelihood gone and proof that in the future, the same sorts of people can use the same sorts of tactics to bully Project Moon into doing whatever they want. All of this sucks.

For those who would like to see the retweets in question alongside translations: https://twitter.com/danghwangs/status/1683884236888223744

And for people who would like reference as to what the artworks these incels were up in arms about, Ishmael in the wet suit and Sinclair in the mechanic's outfit.

[so-i-did-this-thing]

What are good questions to ask in job interviews to find out if a place is going to be friendly to your continued transition? I have been on T for about a year and am job hunting right now and I'm worried about reaching a point sometime in the next year where I have no choice but to come out because I don't read as a woman anymore.

Ok, big caveat from me: I was once in your exact position. I had just started T and decided to interview with a small company who assumed I was a woman. (I am guessing they thought I was a butch lesbian - I still had my gender-neutral deadname. I did not assert my pronouns.) When they gave me an offer, I let them know I was transitioning. I still got hired, but was treated as an inconvenience. They did not suggest I immediately switch to male presentation, and I was too scared to suggest it. It started getting hostile when other employees noticed my voice changing. I really wish I had just gone into the interview presenting male and I ended up quitting the job within 8 months because it got too awkward.

So. As for my advice:

I'd start with Glassdoor to read employee reviews. I'd also check the company's social media, plus that of the people in your chain of command to do some vibe checking. People who are transphobic are commonly going to be very vocal about right-wing leanings, and you'll see some signs, even on LinkedIn. Check if they have anti-discrimination statements in any of their hiring material, or stated commitments to diversity and inclusion.

In the interview, ask about what sort of clients they attract and what charities/orgs they support and sponsor. If you feel the vibes are promising, ask if they sponsor local Pride. Ask general culture questions about team building and employee enrichment. Ask what healthcare benefits look like and other employee assistance perks they may have. Fish around for gendered policies that could cause you problems, like dress codes. That said, can you bite the bullet and go ahead and interview in a masc gender presentation? Because honestly, that will be the best gauge of how you are going to be received. (And in my experience, folks are fairly likely to assume a masc presenting person is male.)

I tend to be very careful about outing myself until I'm sure I'm in a supportive culture with HR to back me up -- and this might be something you can't discover until you are hired and working for a while. And even then, I've just been very matter-of-fact about transition stuff, saying things like (when doing my background check) "I have older documentation that doesn't match my current name or gender marker, and I can provide any additional paperwork if needed." When I changed my legal name, I gave my boss a simple communication plan on how I'd tell co-workers and clients. Though at that point, most folks assumed I was a cis man, so it was a very different experience compared to that awful 8-month long job.

I wish I had more advice, but a lot depends on how badly you need a job, how safe you feel, and if you have options like only staying in your next job until passing as a woman becomes a problem. To be bluntly honest -- you *will* lose opportunities in your life due to being trans and it's just something to have to have backup plans for (I lost a ton of music gig work because everyone in the industry is all up in each other's shit). But whatever you do, document everything you can related to you being trans, because you never know when you'll need to raise a discrimination case. :/

[cocteaucherry]

trials and tribulations

summary- falling in love with your sworn enemy was not something you planned.

cws- p&p au/ bridgerton au, inaccurate use of regency language, 18+, misogyny, talk of pregnancy, foul language, future smut in later chapters, slow slow burn, LENGTHY descriptions

(a/n- the first chapter was running into 2k words so I split it up and edited it <33 I hope you enjoy

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife”

“So it's true that they're rather wealthy?”

“Well ONE of them are rather wealthy, the other not so much.”

“Doesn’t matter if they're both handsome.

“Ugh shoko don't say that”

You sat on the uncomfortable couch stopping your knitting to take part in the conversation, Shoko and Utahime, your lifelong friends sat across from you rather giddy about the wealthy newcomers

“What? It's true.” Shoko grinned her brown hair only reaching past her chin, “Makes the whole ‘being bound’ for life thing much easier.”

Utahime nodded, standing to walk across the small parlor, she sat on the small stool of the pianoforte playing a single note. “That, if men are gonna set the standard we might as well use it to our advantage.”

You rolled your eyes setting your needle and thread to the side, “So by finding an attractive wealthy man is taking advantage?”

“Yeah” they said in unison before giggling.

“Come on Y/n! Who really wants to be married with many children before twenty-five, some women may but not me! I'd like my twenties to amount to more than just my womb.” utahime exclaimed before tightly shutting her mouth when your mother walked in.

While she looked like a term cold woman she was really the best caring mother you could wish for in these times, “Good evening ladies,” your mother nodded with a curt smile, “I'm guessing you all have heard the news?”

“The well-off lads with handsome faces coming to town? No we haven't,” you smirked standing up before your mother’s hands were immediately attached to your shoulders, “This is your time my dear! For you to make your mark and to finally marry!”

Utahime and Shoko had to stifle their laughter.

You looked back with an annoyed grimace on your face as your mother moved to grip your hands, “My dear, you know why I worry, I worry for all of you like my own children.. As you all approach spinster age we mothers grow worried.”

Shoko and Utahime groaned in comparison their mothers had given them the same speech, “Now, I want the both of you to get on home and prepare for their welcoming ball-”

“WE WERE INVITED-” all of your voices rose in a confused squeal before your mother hushed them.

“Invitations were sent out this afternoon-”

“Mother you didn't tell me?!” you whispered yelled as you rushed over to utahime.

“I was going to-”

“Utahime can I please borrow your ribbons?” you pleaded.

“But that's my favorite!”

“Come onnnn pleaseee”

❀⊱┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄⊰❀

“So his name is Satoru Gojo?” you and Shoko stared at the invitation, very impressed by the amount of time and possibly money spent into the thick piece of paper.

“Yeah, I've never seen him but I've heard things. Like how he's conceited and doesn't exactly rub people the right way.” Utahime scoffed at the frill on her delicate dress.

“Oh so your ideal husband?” you grinned jokingly as you felt Shoko flick your forehead, “Ow!” you hissed in pain, whining , rubbing your forehead.

“Thank you Shoko, how far are we?” Utahime peeked out the carriage window to immediately be star struck, “look look!” she pointed, and you a shoko to foot to look out.

You all had passed by the manor countless times, nothing was particularly jaw-dropping about its size but that was it, looking at it from a new angle it was glorious. The overgrown fauna had been trimmed and lights took over all the dark areas, different flowers had overtaken the walls and it was truly breathtaking.

“This is..”

“Amazing, yeah,” you said breathtakingly as the carriage came to an abrupt stop, you heard the voice of your mother and father ahead of you (the adults had opted for a separate carriage) the door to the carriage opened as she quietly ushered you out, “Come come!”

Once you all had approached the entrance you were hit with the strong smell of flowers and expensive perfume, your nose scrunched as you all stepped through the wide open doors. marble statues and flowers hung everywhere, “Think they have enough flowers?” you whispered to Shoko with a grin as you tried your best to not bump into any of the guests.

“We just arrived and I'm already overstimulated.” Utahime groaned before getting stopped by your mother, “Before you leave remember you are here to make a marvelous impression, don't disappoint me.” she stuck a finger out before placing a kiss on your cheek and disappearing into the crowd of people.

“Well, ladies.” Shoko hummed with a grin, “I say we go dance,” she grinned wrapping an arm around Utahime’s neck, “Actually, I'm going to find the wine, you two have fun.” she quickly walked away leaving Shoko to scoff and immediately grab your hand, “C’monnn y/n.. Please..”

“Fine! Fine! Let's go!” you giggled,

As the band played loudly you and Shoko continuously danced, eventually forgetting the whole reason you had come, “Shokoo, how are you not tiredd?” you panted continuing to spin around your dance partner, “goodness you're too weak.” she grinned at you spinning around her own dance partner.

The music had halted and Shoko immediately fell to your side, “And I'm weak?” you laughed smirking as you gripped onto the brunette's arm.

The room suddenly went quiet, hushed mummers filled the room as the guests around you stepped back. “He’s here he’s here!” Shoko whispered quietly tugging on your hand to strap back, “Gojo?-“ you were shushed immediately as your attention was bought to the wide opened door.

A tall slender frame, a beautifully dark blue tailored suit was complimented by his snow white locks, his bright blue eyes scanned the room as a small smile appeared on his face. Accompanying him was a person who you hadn’t seen before, long jet black black hair tied into a bun, his jet black suit offsetting his amber eyes.

“Who’s that?” You whispered to Shoko keeping your eyes on the men as they began to walk towards the cleared aisle everyone had made, “One with the white hair obviously Satoru Gojo, the one next to him I’m guessing is his trusted friend Suguru Geto.”

You nodded confusingly as people bowed next to you, you and Shoko bowed in tandem as they walked by, Geto spared a small glance to you before hurriedly looking away the same stoic look taking place on his face.

“Hm-“ you sighed quietly taking your hands off the fabric of your dress as the two men made their way down the walkway, once they reached the end the music resumed and the breath you didn't know you were holding came out. Were you that nervous?

As you were lost in thought you were quickly bought out by the hands of your mother gripping your soldier, “Did you see how handsome he was? We must introduce you immediately!” your mother pleaded, grabbing your hand, you turned to Shoko with pleading eyes and a smile appeared in her face, “Yeah come on!”

Oh this woman-

before you could release a string of insults you were being pulled away by Shoko, your mother following suit. “Shoko! Please please please-” you shut your mouth as you stood in front of the infamous man known as Satoru Gojo and his friend.

You felt your palms begin to sweat as you were placed upon the beautiful man, your nervousness only skyrocketed as you felt the suffocating glare of Suguru Geto cast over you.

“Mr Gojo and Mr Geto.” your mother bowed with a smile, “My daughter y/n l/n and her friend Shoko Ieiri.” as you and Shoko began to bow you were met with a laugh coming from the white-haired man.

“Please, there's no need for bowing.. I'm not that formal,”

“Satoru..” his black-haired friend began as Gojo quickly shushed him.

“So Miss Shoko and Y/N.. Oh I almost forgot about my wet blanket here, Mr. Suguru Geto, careful he doesn't care for lively things.”

A vein appeared above Geto’s eyebrow as he clenched his jaw. “I'm the one with actual sense.” he quickly retorted which caused Gojo to frown.

“Well I'll leave you both to it,” your mother interrupted, placing a kiss on your cheek before whispering, “Don't mess this up.” she plastered on a smile before walking away into the crowd of people.

Shoko cleared her throat before looking at the two men, “So, how are you two settling into the town?”

“Lovely-”

“Horrible-”

Gojo looked over annoyingly at his friend flicking his arm, “What he means is-”

“No no, please enlighten me Mr. Geto” his body tensed at you saying his name, “What is so horrible about this town?” you questioned a sickly sweet smile taking over your features.

“For one, the architecture is overly simplified-”

“Oh, what a surprise a small town doesn't fit Mr. Geto’s standard.”

Gojo grinned a small laugh leaving his mouth, “Well, you both sound lovely with a great sense of humor.”

“Well thank you, I think it’s time me and my friend get going.. we enjoyed talking with both of you.” Shoko curtsied as you did too, you turned and left Shoko following after.

Once you were out of earshot Gojo looked towards his friend with a grin, “they’re both rather cute aren't they?”

Geto scoffed, shaking his head, “Miss. Ieiri seems a rather pleasant Miss. L/N I’m not so sure.”

The white haired male laughed, placing a hand on his friend’s shoulder, “Maybe I’ll try my luck with her then?”

A vein appeared in Geto’s neck as his fist tightened and Gojo pointed it out, “Got you, you’re too easy to read my dear friend..” he smirked, walking away into the crowd.

Suguru shook his accusation off his eyes searching for your hair but couldn’t be found, he DIDNT want anything to do with you.

At least that’s what he told himself.

[thelostgirl21]

I wish there was a way to clearly say:

I'm personally comfortable being called a "woman", only because I have the sexual dimorphism typically associated with a female of the human species, and that's how other people see me as when they look at my physical appearance; nothing more.

While making 100% sure not to accidentally bring any harm to the trans community, or making it sound like one's gender identity should always match their physical appearance, when that's far from being the case.

Because, until very recently, I'd always been calling myself "a girl", or "a woman" exclusively based on how I physically look.

To me, defining myself as "a woman", has always been the equivalent of describing an external characteristic of my body that others are able to see.

- I'm a woman.

- I'm 5'7''.

- I have brown eyes.

- etc.

It's always been exactly the same to me. It's what you can physically see, not who I am.

Somehow, it's like I completely forgot to develop a sense of personal identity tied to "being a woman" while I was growing up.

I could wake up tomorrow with a body that has the sexual dimorphism of a male of my species instead, have everyone call me a man and suddenly have to live my life as one, and I'd have only ONE problem with it.

Just the one.

My partner is a heterosexual man, so that would be a challenge.

But otherwise, I think I'd just be really curious to explore the physiological differences between my prior body and my new body, and then move on with my life without changing a single thing to the things I like, my behavior in general, personal interests, probably the way I like to dress, too, etc.

I'd just be "looking more masculine" while doing it.

It would be like having blonde short hair instead of my current brown long hair.

The rest of the world would treat me differently as a man, sure! But that wouldn't reflect how I identify or feel inside about who I am.

Just how others now see me as and choose to socially treat me.

My gender, to me, is something that's always existed outside of myself.

I have no personal use for it, nor is it a part of my personality.

I guess I've often been gender-non-conforming, too, not because I was attempting to rebel against my own gender, felt a need to distance myself from the binary, or anything... But just because I've never seen the point of it.

I've had boyfriends telling me that it was like I wanted to be the "man in the relationship", and being upset that I wasn't letting them play their role at times (that hasn't really been an issue with women, oddly enough); and I broke up with them without looking back, because what the fuck was that even supposed to mean?

I wasn't trying to behave like a man or a woman, I was just being myself, and adopting the social roles and behaviors I'm comfortable with. If you can't love me as I am, then what am I supposed to do?

Younger, I've had little boys back at school telling me that "it was weird for a girl to like certain things or express herself a certain way", and my response has always pretty much been to shrug, go "guess I'm a weird girl then", and then continue doing things my way.

(Yes, I'm aware that I've been very privileged to live in a world where I've merely been occasionally bullied or suffered verbal micro-agressions for ignoring the social standards set for "little girls"... Then again, I've probably embraced some of them!

I loved playing with my "He-Man and the Masters of the Universe set", or walking around with a lightsaber pretending to be Luke Skywalker... But I was cool with "My Little Poney" (the originals) and "Rainbow Bright", too!

Like I said, I wasn't trying to be "non-conforming", I just liked whatever I liked!

I was also lucky enough that my parents fully allowed me to go for what I enjoyed in terms of toys, games, activities, playmates, etc., regardless of gender.

And my physical appearance as a child occasionally had people mistaking me for a boy. So, perhaps, the other adults that saw me behave as one in public assumed I was one, and thus put less pressure on me to behave in a way that would have been deemed more "feminine" than "masculine".

By the point I really started looking more "feminine" (like I do now), I guess I'd moved past caring about it, and/or had reached a point where it made no sense to me that it would suddenly have been upsetting that I occasionally behaved "as a boy" or enjoyed "boy things" now when, until then, it had always been perfectly fine and well accepted that I did!

I guess there's something to be said about the influence of early socialisation, and how adults in the social environment of a child respond to a young child's gender, in the level of importance they might instinctively give to it later on.)

Like, I'm pretty sure that, if I were to ask you to determine my gender based on my looks alone (while fully giving you permission to do it), especially when I'm performing on stage wearing makeup, you'd go "you're a woman!" with a fair level of confidence!

But that's just it! To me that's just the way I look. A stylistic choice based on the way my body chose to develop, if you will.

What drives me nuts, though, is that I have zero problem empathizing with the trans community and their need to express their own gender identity, because I know what it feels like to need to be seen and respected as one's authentic self!

You tell me you identify as a woman, a man, agender, genderfae, etc., and/or feel a need to express it? Be yourself, and rock that gender! It is who you are, and it is your right to own it!

The fact that I feel like I don't have any particular use or need for gender doesn't mean that it can't be important for others, and that they don't have a use or need for it themselves.

Just because I don't intimately understand it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist or doesn't matter. It doesn't mean that I can't support, and actively advocate for proper gender recognition and respect in schools and other public places.

I "get it" without "getting it", if you will.

The problem, however, is that I am extremely uncomfortable with the idea that, if I identify as a "woman", people will assume that it means more to me than "I physically look female".

That it will be assumed that I emotionally and psychologically connect with my gender, and feel a need to express it, or a sense of attachment and belonging to the woman gender.

After having called the way my physical body "looks" to others on the outside "being a woman" for decades, it's hard for me to suddenly go "being a woman is not the same as passing for a woman, it's about the gender you identify with inside..." and stop calling myself a woman, because I feel like I've no gender identity inside of myself.

But "agender" doesn't quite feel right to me, either, because I'd never had any problem with the idea of being a woman, until I learned that I was supposed to give a damn about being a woman, and personally connect with my gender, that is.

And "gender non-conforming" doesn't sound quite right, either, because I'm not trying to avoid conforming to the woman gender, or expressing a different gender than the one that was assigned to me at birth.

They basically gave me a gender based on my genitalia when I was born, and I went "Yeah, sure! I guess I can look the part... Why not?"; while ignoring the whole social instructions booklet and guidelines that went with it.

So lately, every time someone has asked me what my gender is, or what gender I identify with, I've had a tendency to freeze, panic, and mentally go:

Like the idea of my having a gender makes no internal sense to me. It's not something I can relate to, "vibe with", or identify with.

Is there a way to respectfully say "I'm calling myself a woman for convenience's sake, because that's the gender traditionally associated with the way I look, and I'm okay with having grown into a feminine appearance by default? But please, don't assume it means anything to me beyond that, or expect me to behave, dress, or do anything according to the woman gender."

I've been using "gender apathetic" in an attempt to convey it, but is that really what it means, and how most people understand it?

Basically, I feel like my answers to these questions would be:

- What physical look do you most resemble? Woman / feminine / female.

- What gender do you identify with? None.

- Do you feel comfortable being called a woman, and her / she pronouns, based on the way you look? Yes.

How do you freaking call or define that?

Non-internalized cisgenderism?

[bruciemilf]

wait I have got to hear your thoughts on bruce being lottie!!

Rewatching Princess and The Frog has got me in a chokehold! But basically, the AU as of now;

It's a well established, well know, well respected fact from the White House to the Bayou; If you ain't Wayne rich, you ain't rich at all.

But you won't catch Thomas Wayne bragging and boosting and yapping about hot cars, or big mansions, or pearly white yachts.

Thomas' pride and joy is one tiny, fawn eyed, overly energetic boy that made Gotham collectively swoon.

"And I want a princess when I grows up!" Bruce is just prancing around in his pink prince costume, adjusting a paper crown that Alfred made, " Or a prince! Can you get me a prince, papa?"

"You know the deal, Bruce; You wish it, daddy grands it; Ain't that right, Martha?"

Martha Kent chuckles in that warm, knowing way of hers. Her friend is infamous for the way he spoils his boy. But the Waynes are good people. And not just because they keep her farm afloat.

"Yeah, you're good on that front. But you know, sweetheart; It doesn't matter if you marry a prince or princess. As long as they make you smile, that's all that matters."

Lois, just a bit older than Bruce, makes a disgusted noise, " I don't want no prince or princess. I just want Princess money."

Bruce squeals, " But a PRINCE. I'd love to marry a Prince. We'd have a big big wedding and the sweetest cake in the world, and everyone would have fun, -- Clark! You gonna be at my wedding, right?"

Clark, dressed up in his blue overalls and paper sword, to fit the knight Bruce always calls him, nods, with a smile that doesn't match his words, " Course I will, Bruce. If you'll have me."

Now. Bruce is so very good at forging fantasies. But when a princess from a far away island rumoured to be populated entirely by women comes into town, it doesn't look like make believe at all.

"Women only? Lucky."

Lois doesn't have the time for dreams; She's a bonafide, concise, straight to the point realist. Taking truth by the throat and brings it to light.

And often enough, truth isn't pretty. And ugly truth, as Parry said, right before booting her right out of her job, doesn't sell.

Luckily, Clark's folks were nice enough to give her a delivery job cause Clark can't drive worth a damn. Still. If she's gonna watch him contain another dreamy sigh for Bruce, she'll blow chunks.

"Did you see her in them papers?! That's the prettiest woman I ever did see!"

Mr. Wayne growls behind his newspaper (that Lois could've written better than fucking JIMMY) and Bruce doubles down, " Um. After mama."

Mr Thomas smiles. "Hm. Guess you're finally getting that princess, huh, Brucie?"

Even in adulthood, Bruce squeals like a strangled kitten, " Where's Clark? Can't have the perfect wedding without the perfect best man!" Lois bites her lip and stacks up the peaches in Mrs. Wayne's Cafe.

After all these years, she just refuses to let that old place go. Lois has to respect that. Martha gives her a sympathetic look, warms her up with a mother's love. " How's work, Lo?"

"It's work, Mrs. Wayne. Thank you for that big order for the masquerade ball. At this point, you're the only ones keeping that farm alive..."

"Give those apples some credit," she winks, but squeezes Lois' hand, " If you ever need anything..."

"Thank you. But I don't take handouts."

"Pride won't buy you food, honey. But I guess I gotta wait for you to open your own newspaper. Then I'll make you rich. You'll see."

Bruce is just hugging and squeezing on Clark's arm, ranting a mile a minute about his wedding colors, his cake flavor, the honeymoon, all while nuzzling Clark's toned arm.

And Clark does what he does best; Hide behind a smile.

Alfred sighs, " If he wasn't mine, I'd whack that boy's head with a pan."

"You'll do no such thing, or so help me!"

"Save it for the after party, Tommy dear," Martha chuckles, " But I gotta understand, -- this Diana lady's making waves. I never even seen a woman talk to the mayor before. Let alone yell at 'Im."

"That's cause Tommy Elliot only wants women under his desk," A roll of the eye, a coil of disgust fanning resentment In her gut, Lois takes the box. "Sides, little miss princess probably ain't better than he is. "

The problem with always looking back is you're never ready for the forward.

When Lois bumps up in something tall, solid, and warm, she thinks its Clark. Except neither she or Clark smell like vanilla ice cream and clean air and blue oceans.

Clark certainly doesn't have long, majestic hair gracefully dancing in the winds. He doesn't have blood red lips, or strong blue eyes.

Clark's eyes were summer sky blue. Not a blue Medusa herself couldn't stone.

And he certainly doesn't make her heart stop with a smirk.

"Well," Diana Fucking Prince says, voice satin and velvet, "I don't know about being a better. But I could change your mind about that."

[moraxswhore]

Vanitas

2.1k words

bottom!ghost top!soap

Simon can't fucking take it anymore. All he can think about is the fact that the only thing separating him from Johnny's cock is nothing but a skirt and a full wedding reception. He'd been patient through the entire ceremony and through the first couple hours of the reception, but he can't wait any longer. If he doesn't get his hands under that fucking kilt soon, he's going to stab someone.

- or -

Soap prevents a crime by dicking down his boyfriend

He hated the military full dress uniform. It's itchy and tight, and it feels wrong in all the wrong places compared to his regular work fit, but he was explicitly told, by Price, that he can't wear full tactical gear to Soap’s sister’s wedding. For Johnny, and for Judith, he will put up with the formal wear for one evening, then he can pack it away for at least another six months to gather dust in a closet somewhere.

"You nearly ready, Si?" Ghost hears Johnny call from the bedroom, because he insisted 'it's easier to put a kilt on lying down', so Simon resigned himself to getting ready in the bathroom, attempting to look somewhat presentable. His tie is refusing to sit correctly no matter how much he tries to fix it, his medals situated obnoxiously on his chest feel like a gloat of his crimes, getting a medal for doing his job and being forced to show it off at formal events. He hates it,it puts the attention on him.

"I guess." He gives up on his tie, deciding that how it looks now is as good as it's going to get as he runs a hand through his curls in an pointless attempt to tame them, though after years under the mask, the curls have a mind of their own and refuse to listen to the wishes of any hair product. Simon just accepts defeat and walks out the bathroom.

Ghost knew that Soap was wearing a kilt to the wedding, it was a conversation they had when Simon asked what he should wear. He asked if Soap was also going to be wearing full dress only to be told:

"My mother would skin me alive if I showed up to that wedding in anything other than a MacTavish tartan kilt and I am more scared of my mum than I will ever be of Price."

So, Ghost should have been prepared to see Soap in a kilt for the first time, knowing that it was happening. Goddamn, was he wrong. Walking out of the bathroom and seeing Soap in a full kilt, white shirt, and black jacket hugging his frame just right, it does something to Ghost. There’s just enough leg visible, that Ghost feels like a Victorian man seeing a woman's ankles for the first time.

"Mum can't complain that I haven't cleaned up for Judy's wedding, can she?" Soap laughs as he bends over to fix his shoelaces, and that's when Simon sees it, more like what he doesn’t see. A lack of underwear under the kilt, the MacTavish family jewels in all their pride and glory, his cock hanging free and heavy. He could put his face right in there, eat Johnny out right now with no issue (other than Mama MacTavish murdering them for being late), but with such a delightful meal in front of him, Simon thinks he could die a happy man. "Steamin' Jesus Si, you look like a fucking wet dream in that suit, I'd devour you right now if it wouldn't make us late."

Soap walks over to him and quickly fixes his tie and the mess that is his uncooperative curls, and Simon has to fight the urge to drop to his knees right there in the room, instead forcing his feet to move, following Soap out the door and to the church.

This is going to be a long day.

Simon can't fucking take it anymore. All he can think about is the fact that the only thing separating him from Johnny's cock is nothing but a skirt and a full wedding reception. He'd been patient through the entire ceremony and through the first couple hours of the reception, but he can't wait any longer. If he doesn't get his hands under that fucking kilt soon, he's going to stab someone.

He watches from the side of the room as Johnny dances with his sister, the pair laughing as Judith steps on his feet; Ghost would probably find it just as funny if he wasn't bricked up and leaking all over his underwear. It reaches a point of, in Johnny's words, ‘too horny to think anything other than gay’, that he has to do something about it. The solution? Ghost strides over to where Johnny and his sister are dancing and barks out at him to follow.

And Johnny, the ever loyal soldier, follows without question, passing his sister off to dance with their father before striding after Simon, trailing behind him through the corridors of the church  to the now-empty chapel, the rest of the wedding guests in the banquet room for the reception. 

Johnny is barely in the room before Simon has the door closed and the Scot pressed against the mahogany wood. He sinks to his knees, forcing his way under the kilt and he's met with the thick musk of Johnny's sweat. Moaning as he noses at Soap’s balls, Simon licks at the seam between his thigh and crotch, the salty ambrosia melting on his tongue as he explores every crevice he can reach, Soap’s hand on his head trying to guide him to his cock.

"Please, Simon." Johnny's whines only spur Ghost on, licking and sucking on any and all exposed skin his mouth can find, painting Soap’s thighs in an array of purple bruises. The heavy weight of Soap’s cock against his face, leaking precum down his cheeks, has him so lost in desperation that he finally takes the cock head in his mouth, moaning whorishly at the salty desire dripping onto his tongue.

"Should've done this this morning, maybe you wouldn't have been such a moody brat then," Johnny says as he lifts the kilt just enough to run his fingers through the unruly curls of Simon’s hair, grabbing a handful tightly to control him. "Such a cock hungry slut, you couldn't even wait until the reception was over, can't go a few hours without being filled like a whore."

Moans and whines echo off the walls as Soap bullies Ghost’s throat with his cock, the rough pace making his eyes water as the tears threaten to spill, spurred on by the delightfully degrading words being spat at him. He can't help whining in displeasure as he's pulled off of Soap’s cock, guided to stand by the hand still tightly holding his hair, and roughly dragged to the nearest pew.

"You want to act like a whore, then I'll treat you like one."

Soap pushes him down onto a pew, his back against the hard wood of the seat as Johnny makes quick work of removing his trousers and underwear leaving him bare from the waist down. He forces his legs open, hooking one leg over the back of the pew he’s lying on, the other over the pew in front and the cold air against his cunt makes him realise just how wet he is. "Look at you, dripping for it, so desperate for my cock."

The painful pleasure of Soap’s hand hitting his cock knocks the air from his lungs, the wood of the pews digging into his legs as he tries to force them closed, it earns him a displeased tut from Johnny and another slap to his already sensitive cock. 

"Take what you're given like the good boy I know you can be." Soaps fingers easily slide into his slick hole, with Simon’s symphony of moans echoing off the hallowed walls. The sunlight streams in through the stained glass windows, painting Ghost's body in a heavenly array of colour. "Look at you, a work of art laid beneath me, God watching as I defile you in His house."

Ghost can feel the tears forming in his eyes as Soap’s fingers hit all the right spots inside him, the impending orgasm building.

"Do you think He's jealous? Jealous that I have death falling apart in my fingers, moaning my name, worshipping me in His house." Johnny leans in close to whisper in his ear, Simon’s whimpers and whines entangling themselves in the praise. Every word and sound enunciated by the wet sound of Soap's fingers in Simon’s slick hole, his thumb stroking his cock. "Go on, Mo ghràdh, show him how you sing your praises."

His orgasm rushes through him, Soap's fingers never stopping their assault on his cock and the overstimulation has his legs shaking against the pews. 

"Too much, please." Words tumble out his mouth as Simon struggles to contain his noises. The oversensitivity on his cock after his orgasm never relents, even after Johnny removes his fingers from him. Ghost watches through half lidded eyes as Johnny licks his fingers clean from Simon's slick. "Johnny, I can't, no more."

"You'll take what you're given, doll." Soap lifts up his kilt to reveal his hard, leaking cock, the underside of the kilt stained with precum. Simon watches as his lover gathers slick from his used hole, using it to ease the glide on his cock. He can't control the stuttering of his hips as Soap rubs his leaking tip against Simon's cock, pleas and whines escaping his mouth. "I haven't even had my fill yet, didn't realise I was dating such a selfish little slut."

"No, please, want you." He knows he sounds pathetic, his voice barely above a whine, a whimper, but he can't find it in him to care, not when the thought of Soap's cock inside him, his lover roughly using him as he pleases, sings so loudly in his ears he can't begin to care about how loud his moans are. "Use me, please."

"Oh don't you worry, doll, I'll treat you right." Simon's eyes flutter shut at the slight pressure of Johnny's cock entering his hole, the full feeling hitting just right as his lover's hips meet his, giving him no time to adjust before Johnny sets a rough pace. The sound of skin on skin echoes off the walls, accompanied beautifully by the tenor of moans leaving the pair’s lips. "Should keep you bred all the time, nice and full with my seed, my perfect little cumdump for me to use. Always nice and wet for me, bend you over any surface and have my way with you, leave you dripping with my cum."

"Yes, please, yes-" The air knocks out his lungs as Soap grabs his thighs, folding him in half, his knees against his chest, Soap's cock hitting deeper than before, his mind blanking from the pleasure as he feels Soap's fingers enter his mouth in an attempt to silence him.

"Don't want the entire church to hear how much of a whore you are, wouldn't want them walking in, seeing you begging for my cock." Soap's pace never relents, the pain of his lovers hips slamming against his, and the burn in his thighs adding to the cacophony of blinding pleasure building in his core. "A big, strong lieutenant whimpering and whining for his subordinate's cock, brought to tears by having a cock in his hole, and what a pretty hole it is for me to use. For only me to use."

All he can do is make muffled moans as the weight of Soap's fingers in his mouth, pushing on his tongue. The degrading praise of Johnny's words flood his brain as he whines pathetically around the fingers in his mouth, his second orgasm rushing through him, his slick squirting out of him soaking the underside of Soap’s kilt, the relentless pace never slowing, the overstimulation shivering through his body.

"Look at you, my own fountain of youth, only I know how to make you flow." Soap's pace stutters as he buries himself so his hips are flush with Simons as he cums deep inside, the tip of his cock grinding against Simons cervix. "Gonna fill you up, breed you nice and full."

Soap begins to pull out, Ghost instinctively wraps his legs around his lover's waist to stop him, wanting him to stay inside, but his mind comes back to the present as he remembers where they are. He tries looking around for something to wipe himself with, not wanting to go through the rest of the reception with cum dripping out of him.

"You got a tissue?" Soap chuckles at him before throwing his underwear and suit trousers at him.

"No, you want to act like a whore, then you can deal with the consequences." He watches in disbelief as Soap fixes the kilt to make it look presentable, and not like he's just fucked the daylights out of his boyfriend. "And maybe if you're good, I'll treat you when we get home."

Simon accepts that he's going to have to leave the mess that's currently leaking from his hole and begrudgingly pulls on his underwear and dress trousers. If his treat is even half as good as what just happened, then it'll be worth ruining his underwear.

That kilt is going to be the death of him.

[more-cardigan-than-woman]

Enough, Enough Now.

Summary: You're getting married! Why can't you stop crying?

Jason Todd x ExReader

2.5k

Warnings: SMUT 18+ Only. Chocking, Oral, angst, HAPPY ENDING. Dick Cameo, Kate Cameo.

Enough.

"Hey kid, how you feeling?" Kate asks as she steps into the bridal suite, "holy shit, you look good." She smiles as she takes in your wedding dress, the fancy style of your hair and the exquisite way you've done your makeup. 

"Kate, i-" you turn to her, tears already welling in your eyes.

"Oh kiddo," she rushes forward, embracing you in a tight hug, her fingers gently brushing the tears as they start to fall, "you know you don't have to do this."

"I know, I know," you start to sob into her shoulder, "I want to. It's just-"

"Jason." 

"Yeah, I feel like he's here. Like he's watching me, still."

"He's not here." She pulls you back, holding you by the shoulders, "It's only us. Dicks on his way, but Jay-"

"I feel like I'm doing the wrong thing," you confess, deflating into an armchair, "I just- is this even fair to marry him when-" 

"Look at me, kiddo." Kate says sternly, smiling down at you when your eyes meet, "This life, it's not for everyone. I think you're smart to get out. God knows I wish I had."

"I still love him."

"It'll pass."

Meanwhile on a rooftop across town.

"Figured I'd find you here." Dick smirks, his face taking up the full view of Jason's scope, "thought you weren't coming little wing."

"I'm not. I'm just here to make sure she's alright."

"Let me take a peek." Dick pushes him out of the way so he can stare down the scope, noticing how you're held in Kate's arms, "doesn't look okay to me."

"I know. She's been like it all morning."

"Go to her."

"Dick, I can't. You know I can't."

"Why not? Just tell her you love her and steal her away. Shit man, I'll help you."

"She's getting married! It's not like-"

"Like what? Like you still love her? Like you know that she loves you. It's easy."

"It's not easy. She deserves better than me Dick. Someone safe and fucking normal like Dr whatever his name is."

"I thought you'd know better than to tell a woman what she deserves."

"It doesn't matter anyway." He says with a sigh, sliding down the guard rail and pressing his face into his hands, "it's done, she's getting married Dick. Whatever I want, it doesn't matter. It's too late."

"It's not. Never is, little brother."

The Bridal Suite.

"Sorry I'm late, got caught up," Dick smiles as he walks into your room, giving Kate a quick high five, "time to tag out Katie, I got it from here."

"Good luck, she's a mess." Kate says, grabbing her coat and a glass of wine, "I'll see you in a few." She kisses your forehead, wrapping her strong arms around your head and giving it a squeeze.

"Thanks Kate," you wipe the tears away, "I'll be alright."

"Course ya will. I'm here now." Dick beams, encircling your waist and pulling you into a hug.

"Have you seen him?" You blurt out as soon as Kate exits the room.

"Yeah. I saw him."

"He's here isn't he? I can feel him."

"Aren't you marrying someone else?"

"Yeah," you sigh, "guess I am."

"Good. So tell me, is this really what you're wearing?"

"Fuck you! This dress is perfect."

"Dude, you look like a cloud."

"I do not!" 

"Kind of do. Like a big white fluffy cloud."

"Don't be a dick on my wedding day." 

"Comes with the name."

"Whatever, we should get going."

"I just need to go to the bathroom." He smirks, "don't wanna have to pee during and miss the ceremony." 

"Fine. Actually, could you help me? I was going to ask Kate, but-"

"How do we do that?"

With a lot of maneuvering and lifting and twisting of your fluffy cloud dress you finally manage to get yourself on the toilet with Dicks help. 

"We're late." You mutter looking down at your phone. Noticing that you still haven't heard from him. Not a message or a call or anything. 

"Let's go then. Wouldn't want the cloud Princess to be late."

"You're not calling me that." You glare at him.

"Of course, Miss Cloud.” he extends your elbow for you, “Now let's go get you married." 

The walk down to the large greenhouse has your hands twitching, your nails digging into the nook of Dicks arm as you approach Eli and the rest of your life. Are you making a mistake? Fuck, why does it feel like you are? Like you should be walking down to meet someone else. Someone taller, bulkier, eyes blue as the sky that's shining through the windows.

"It's all right, Cloudy. It'll be ok." Dick squeezes on your hand, "I can help you run if that's what you want."

"No. I just-" you shake the thoughts from your head, "nerves."

"No need for that, puff n fresh." 

"You're right."

"Righter than you think," he smiles as he presses a soft kiss into your hair, before pulling the veil over your face, "Open the door." He says to the attendant who's standing by, "she's ready."

The door swings open and your eyes are already downcast. You're thankful for Dicks sturdy arm leading you down the aisle. You can hear Selina, her gentle voice coming from the left, telling you how pretty you look. Dicks hand squeezes yours as you feel water starting to fill your eyes. This is wrong. That you shouldn’t be doing this. It’s a mistake. You stare up at Dick to tell him as much, but he only gives you a reassuring smile. He releases your hand to rest his on your back, "I got you." He whispers, "it's alright."

"I-"

"Just a few more steps."

You keep your eyes on Dick as you stop. Unsure you can even look Eli in the eye and tell him no. You can't.

"You're not here to marry me," Dick smiles, trying to pry your hand from around his arm, "turn around, little cloud."

You give him a nod,  turning in place to face Eli. Your eyes still downcast when you notice heavy combat boots in place of Elis signature loafers. Your eyes travel upwards, the suit pants are wider though just as black. You fixate on the strong hands that reach down for your veil, unable to look up. Are you imagining this? Is your heart going to fall onto the floor when your eyes meet his?

"I'm up here, Kitten." Jason's low voice whispers as he drapes the veil over your hair and his fingers hook under your chin, "look at me."

Hesitantly, your eyes travel up as he lifts your jaw, "Hi." Jason beams at you, "sorry I was late."

"You- we." You fling your arms around the back of his neck, your dress poofing out behind you as he holds you so tight you think you might split in two. "Grayson." You mutter into Jason's neck.

"You're not mad?" Jason asks right into your ear. 

"Did you kill him?"

"No, Dick paid him off. Which was surprisingly easy."

"Asshole." 

"Idiot. I wouldn't trade you for anything." He starts to kiss into your neck. "You wanna get married, Kitten?" He asks as he sets you on your feet, "be a shame to waste such a pretty dress."

"Yes."

"Good girl. We can sort the rest out later."

You can't stop smiling, the world seems to have gone from the wrong way up to spinning so fast in an instant. You're disappointed in Eli first of all for being so easily bought. But you can't be mad at Dick for what he did, though the uncertainty of what's going to come after this is niggling at the back of your mind. The voice is small, almost inaudible under the joy in your bones.

As the night draws to a close you say goodnight to all your guests, which with Eli's family bailing amounted to about 10 Wayne's and a few of the friends you'd made in town. 

"This our room?" Jason asks, scooping you up in his arms as you open the door, "it's nice. But you know what'd be nicer Kitten?"

"What's that?"

"Letting me unwrap my wedding gift."

"Jay I-" 

"Come here," he sits down on the edge of the bed, his arms reaching out for you, "Good girl, now turn around."

"I'm the gift." You realise as you spin and his lips land on your shoulder.

"Yes, the best gift Grayson has ever gotten me." His fingers work slowly to untie the corset back of your dress, gliding in and out his breath growing heavier with each tug on the ribbon. "Step out," he says holding the skirt wide for you, "now turn around." He scans over the tiny bodysuit, the white lace wrapping around you in all the right places. His lip is almost bleeding from how hard he's biting down on it.

"Can I undress you?"

"Yes, my beautiful wife. But I want to hear you say it."

"Please," you kneel down, your hands skating up this thighs, "my perfect," your get his belt undone with one flick and yank it form his pants, "handsome," you unbutton him, "sneaky, wonderful husband," he lifts up letting you pull his pants from you, "please can I undress you."

"Such a good wife." His hand weaves through your hair, "you want to suck my cock?"

"Mine now." You smirk up at him, licking at his head as he starts to grow in your hand.

"Yes Kitten." He thrusts up into your mouth, "all yours." His hand tightens in your hair, pushing himself further down your throat. "Fuck you're so good at that, Kitten." He moans, your pussy quivering at the sound. "Yes- yes- fuck. Just like that." 

You lick at the underside of his cock, sucking at the tip as he withdraws. Your nails biting into his thighs as you fight to breathe through your nose. Your pussy aching and pulsing with every breath he takes, every moan that leaves his lips and the shaky way he calls you Kitten.

"You need to stop." He shakes, trying to pull you from him, "be a good wife and stop." His fingers yank at your hair, drawing you back and smiling at the pout on your lips, "get on the bed." He demands, pulling his tie out and throwing his jacket and shirt to the wayside as you climb onto the bed behind him. "Fuck you're beautiful." He says, sliding his hands down your legs and hooking his fingers into the snaps on your body suit. "How will I get this off you?" His teeth connect with your thigh as his lips work to ease some of the pain.

"Lick me, please." 

"What perfect manners," his head dips between your legs, "how could I deny my wife." His teeth snag on your buttons, ripping them apart until he's finally got your pussy free and he starts to languidly lick and lap at you, "so wet Kitten. This all for me?"

"Yes, always."

"I know. Always." His hand snakes up, flicking the delicate ring on your finger, "you're mine forever now Kitten." His tongue presses into your pussy, fucking into you. His thumb presses on your clit, and you can already feel your body start to tingle. 

"Jay- fuck." You arch down into him, pressing your pussy into his face. But he pulls back, his eyes searching yours.

"Kitten." He says in a low warning tone as his fingers press at you. "Say it." You start to squirm under him, "say it wife and I'll give you what you need." He palms at his cock as his fingers press into you deeper, "you can do it."

"Daddy." You moan as his fingers fill you and he presses his lips to yours, "fuck me, please fuck me."

"Again."

"Daddy please I need you to fuck me." You beg, your nails clawing into his shoulders to try and bring him closer.

"Good girl." He wraps your legs around him, his cock slapping down onto your clit, "my pretty wife." He slaps it again before lining himself up, his fingers gripping his base.

"Fuck, Daddy." You cry as he presses into you with one thrust, "fucking burns." 

"Going to fuck you like this every night." He pants, picking up one of your knees and throwing it over his shoulder, "make up for- Uh, fuck. Make up for all the nights we've been apart."

"Too many."

"Way too many." His hand gently holds your face as he starts to fuck into you. Your boobs bouncing from the force of him, your hands gripping tight on his arms to keep you in place. "Got a lot to make up for, Kitten. Starting now," his longer fingers rub at your clit, your pussy starts to pulse as you cry out into the night. "Give it to me." He moans, he brings you higher so he can fuck down into you, "give me my cum." 

You moan into his mouth as your release floods his cock, the wet slapping sounds ringing in your ear as you start to see stars, "too much," you pant as he goes harder and faster.

"More, give me more pretty wife."

"Can't."

"Yes you can. You can take it." His hand slides from your chin around your neck, "cum again and again for me. Make me fill you up."

"Deeper," his hand releases your throat for a second, picking up your other leg and pressing his cock even further inside you. Grinding down and rearranging your guts as his tongue swirls inside your mouth.

"I love you, little wife." He moans into your mouth.

"I love you," you pant back, grinding up into him, "love you so much it hurts."

"Can feel you getting close again. Let go, tell me you love me and let go. I got you. I got you forever."

"I love you, fuck. Right there. Yes. I love you," you brain starts to fog as you're overwhelmed with Jason, with pleasure and the reassurance that he's not leaving this time. You spasm, your muscles locking into place, toes curling and your back arching as you shiver underneath him. Jason's cock pulses, throbs and releases inside you, sending another wave of pleasure over you. 

Your body goes limp, your mind dead as you attempt to catch your breath. Gently Jason lets go of your legs, his body rolling you on top of him as he pants beneath you. His fingers rubbing through your hair as you bask in the afterglow.

"Are you ok little wife?" He asks in the softest tone you've ever heard.

"Wonderful."

"Good, get some rest." 

"What happens now? Are you going to give him up?" You say, already feeling sleep pricking at your eyes.

"We'll talk about it in the morning. I think I found a compromise."

"Not going back to Gotham." You admit, wondering if maybe you should have had this discussion before, ya know impulsively getting married.

"I wouldn't ask you too. Dicks got a plan."

"Are we joining the circus?" You ask, nuzzling into his chest. His strong arms wrapping around you, holding you close.

"Oh, little wife. You joined the circus the second I laid eyes on you."

Taglist.

@lovelyrissa @megumisbabymomma @nutmeg030 @gone-batty-fics

AN: My brains kind of broken at the moment so im just going through and finishing all my WIPS

[your-queer-dad]

Hey Dad,

I'm feeling kind of down. I was walking to get lunch with a friend and a group of people started making fun of the way I was dressed and my body. (I'm overweight and like to wear cropped shirts) They also sneered at me loudly asking "Is it a man or woman?" (I'm a trans masc NB and usually I'd wear that as a point of pride but they were huge butts about it.) I hate my town and how small minded they are. I guess I got too used to hanging in the queer district and forgot how judgemental people outside of the community are. I have never had this happen since I started dressing this way, and I wore a bikini at the district pool. I don't want to change the way I am, and I won't, I just wish people were better.

Hey kiddo, I completely understand that feeling, and you're completely right. Please don't change yourself over these judgey people. You are amazing and unique and incredible. Don't let negative people drag you down.

- dad x

[gin-juice-tonic]

Hey Gin this might be a silly thing to ask, but how did you realize you were trans? Cause ever since I saw your trans Stan and Ford I think I had some sort of relivation, it started with just really enjoying the art you drew to me feeling some sort of envy. Either that I want to dress more masculine or that I actually want to be a man, cause honestly when I look at your trans stans I just feel so much gender envy (jealousy?) And on my last period I had a whole crying fit over it starting, which has never happened before. I just don't know if this is actually what I'm feeling or if it isn't. I've had thoughts of telling my mom and fearing the consequence. This is just all so new and I'm honestly scared. I figured I'd ask you since I look up to you and from what I've seen you are quite wise. I don't really know why I have so much self doubt and constantly flip flop over things. It's frustrating, I just wish I could be certain about something for once. Sorry about this, I'm a mess really.

It’s not silly to ask. My answer is unfortunately a little silly, because I’m a goober. I also typed A LOT so its all going under a read more

So, I was 16 and on tumblr even more than I am now, and I was (still am) friends with a trans woman who reblogged a post that was like “Just trans girl things: eating dark chocolate because it has substances similar to estrogen” and I went “Haha i guess I should stop eating it.” followed by “…why do I feel that way” and THAT was followed by quite the crisis.

Trans men weren’t as well known about back then, so I was like “Well, it means nothing, since only women can be trans”. And then I found out men could be trans too and that pushed my crisis further along. And I started to think. About how I liked when people defaulted to male pronouns for me on the internet, or how when i was a kid I would use a crazy amount of shampoo to make my hair look short and flatten my chest in front of the mirror and look at it. Things like that. And I got upset because “no i can’t be trans that’s impossible”. I would google things like “how do you know if you’re trans”, “quiz to see if you’re trans”, ect.

But the idea of being seen as a man was exciting. It was tantalizingly exciting. And I knew it could be possibility for me someday, and I knew that made a part of me happy and I couldn’t un-know it.

Final straw was a nonbinary person I had been following made a post about how they were going to start taking testosterone. And instead of feeling happy for them I just got mad and started sobbing to myself. Because I was so extremely jealous. So jealousy absolutely has its place in figuring things out.

You should think. Think about attaining the things you’re envious about. Does this make you happy? It’s okay if it’s upsetting or scary at the same time. Change often is. But if it makes you happy, excites you, gives you hope for the future, it’s worth thinking more about.

-

You don’t have to jump into telling your mom right away (and I wouldn’t really recommend it till you’re a little more sure of yourself). You can go at whatever pace you want to. I didn’t tell my mom (or anyone in my real life at all) till I was like, 20. And I’d known for 4 years at that point. You’ve sent me a tumblr message, so I’m assuming you’ve got an account here. I’d say asking your friends on this website to address you as male would be a good way to ease into things. And you can see if you like that or not.

For how you dress, again, you can ease into it. Personally it made me happy to dress in athletic clothing (especially tank tops- to show off my non existent guns), or to dress like a greaser (Though I preferred a black t shirt to a white one), or a golfer. None of those things particularly scream ‘man’ but they were man enough to me. You can find things man enough for you. If you want to try out a binder and think you can get one without anyone noticing, my first ever one was a Tri-top from Underworks. They’re like $30 or so. I was able to get away with buying it because I was a cosplay nerd so I just said it was for that.

If you’re the type of person who owns makeup- you could try to find some time alone just to have an experiment of mimicking drag king makeup, or makeup for cosplayers doing male characters. I did that once early on, and while it looked admittedly goofy, it made me ecstatic at the time.

-

Er sorry for things getting so long. But I just want to say lastly that self doubt is both normal and okay. And thinking far in the future (ie- things like coming out to people or hormones or anything like that) might scare you. But you can take things one step at a time if you want to. Play with just looking at clothes, making outfits on pinterest or whatever, imagining scenarios where people address you as male, thinking of names you might like. See what makes you happy, and expand on the things that do from there.

And regardless of what you discover, in the end you will have learned more about yourself. And that's always a good thing.

[selfshippinglover]

Okay so just some thoughts about the Ben interview @ghiertor-the-gigapeen

~Bonjur returns! :DD

~ This is after Mark's death and you can hear hurt he is :(((

~Talks about sitting around and twiddling his thumbs, feeling lost without orders/ a command

~comes from a long line of servants

~Arrested for public nudity in Uni sdkhgdg (FRAT INITIATION OFC)

~Parents are from England

~MARK WAS ALSO ARRESTED IN THE FOR NUDITY OFC BUT WAS IN BUTLER SCHOOL TOO?? WHAT? HIM, A BUTLER??

~AWWW MARK AND HIM MET WHEN BEN TOOK THE ARREST FOR MARKS STREAKING BRRRO TWT

~Ben dresses Mark when he passes out drunk(oh Ben sweetie)

~DOES COCaine ksdvHbjk

~ 3 wishes would be Mark doesn't die, everyone in the world gets their own butler, and everything to be clean all the time(so true bestie)

~ It's like anytime he brings up Mark he's moments away from crying like you can't tell me he doesn't care about him :(((

~Doesn't like Chef like everyone else xD

~MARK WAS AT THE MASTER HARVARD AND BEN WAS AT THE HARVARD SERVANT SCHOOL APPARENTLY??

~Mastertude school is prooobably to make sure people don't get overpaid =-= (i'd bet partying and gossiping too tho!!)

~Most difficult task was when Mark filled a tub with hot coco(bleh) and he had to clean it up(christ)

~Ben wouldn't clean Mark up, he made him clean up himself (so surprisingly, mark can do that but I'm sure he'd prefer not to liek the little bitch eh is dskhbgsdb)

~Mark sucked at cleaning himself SMHHHH

~BEN THINKS OF MARK AS A GOOD FRIEND WAAHHHTOT

~MARK THANKED HIM, SHARED DRINKS WITH HIM, AND ALLOWED HIM TO JOIN IN ON PARTIES? AWWW Mark really did care i think ,,QwQ,, (at least, that's the most we've ever heard of such a thing happening)

~Mark hired him right out of Uni

~No medical issues related to WKM Except that murder is a triggering subject for him

~WILL BROKE THE VASE IN THE WINE CELLAR WHILE DRUNK AND ANGRRY

~DAMN HE DOESN'T LIKE WILLIAM? SAYS HE "WAS ALWAYS AN ISSUE"? OOF THEY DIDN'T GET ALONG I GUESS?? GEEZ FINDS HIM OUTLNADISH DSksgb

~ William owed Mark a LOT of money, Ben saying it's like a life debt's worth

~DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT THE WINE IN THE CELLAR BUT CALLED THEM A MONSTER AND BLAMES THEM FOR KILLING MARK SDGLHGGJL(He's more right and wrong than he knows)

~was drinking with Mark before the night of the party

~Lives in the mansion and is working 24/7 =-=

~That wine was an 1810 Chardonnay

~OOOH MARK LEFT BEN HSI MANSION ANS FUNDS IN HSI WILLLLLL QOQ..

~But another part of the will was to check up on William every few months and man he doesn't liek doing that :((

~doesn't like Will's denial of the dying(it's just not right), doesn't trust him, but also doesn't believe he killed Mark

~Fell into a depression once Mark left and still is but is trying to go out again nearly a year since then :((

~Had Ben wear gloves the last few months before the party while everything was going down. Didn't want help, to be touched, to be seen, nothing. Ben called it all weird

~enjoys jogs cause it remind him of a happy memory :)

~Ben born in 1891!!!

~Graduated school in 96

~So five years of butlering

~Graduated top of class, known as the "greatest butler of history" in butler magazine.

~Likes beer and occasional scotch :)

~Always wanted to be known as the best servant hat every lived, that people would bid for him to be theirs (BUDDY YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER THOOO)

~WAHHHH BEN JUST WANTS TO BE A FRIEND TOO TO ANY OF HIS MASTERS ;-;

~DAMN HE STRAIGHT UP SAID I'M SO GOOD A OF A BUTLER I'LL MAKE YOU A BETTER PERSOOON (Wonder if he thought of Mark like that too :.)

~CERTIFIED PET GROOOMER WOOOOO

~Loves and is loved by animals :)

~Only experience with supernatural is night with Celine and he still doesn't understand what happened to her :((

~He has mourned for Celine, describes her as a kind woman, as has missed her since the divorce...

~Has a hard time finding time for himself :((

~THE ONLY BELONGINGS HE HAS IS HIS UNIFORM??

~Mark really cared about status, being the best, a lot of stairs

~Doesn't like dirt hjgjj

~No opportunities to make friends cause of work(no wonder he likes Mark and Celine so much. He probably saw them most. Wonder bout dames tho!!)

~poor man starts his work day at 4 am

~BUTLER BALL CANON(But wants to run romantic partners by master)

~SAID THE BLACK BUTLER LINE

~Bad press after Mark's death lowered his approval rating amongst butler alumni :( ~wants a private quarter that only he uses

~Likes hanging out the DA :DD

~Believes the Detective's background checks out but finds him odd

~He doesn't take days off? BRO ;-; HE JUST WANTS TO BE DISTRACTED

~CRIES HE CALLS US BEACONS OF HOPE??? ;-;

~Celine and Mark attached at the hips since childhood?(HOLY SHIT THEY WERE FRIENDS TO LOVERS TOO??)

~Has no idea why Celine left Mark

~GEEZ HE'S SAYING GROUNDSKEEPING IS BELOW A BUTLER WOOF

~ Speaks English, German, spanish, and french(but only a little)

~Not allowed to get sick?? does not get sick? Calls in replacements??

~4th of July fireworks run at the last minute! Mark was apologetic and gave him a bonus? They just shot the breeze with fireworks together?AWW THAT'S SO SWEET

~Mark treated the Chef with kindness and respect(DOUBTFUL KJGJBGSD)

~Mark and Dames are close friends and also used each other to look good socially

~Had secrets about one another that he couldn't speak of? (SOUNDS PRETTY FRUITY??)

~Really enjoys Damian's company :)

[softguarnere]

Fic Writer Interview

Thank you for the tag @mercurygray!

How many works do you have on AO3?

Currently 6, but hopefully that number will go up over spring break

What's your total AO3 word count?

119,136

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Like A Girl (Like A Man) - Band of Brothers

Just A Kid - The Outsiders

Bear The Burden Alone - The Chronicles of Narnia

For Whatever We Lose - Band of Brothers

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, absolutely! I share my writing because it allows me to connect with people who share my interests. If I'm not posting replies, it feels more like a one sided conversation, imo. Also, it seems the polite thing to do

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

It's about to be Like A Girl (Like A Man)! You'll see why soon >:)

What the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

On AO3, it's probably Bear The Burden Alone, but I try to keep the fics that I post here on Tumblr kinda upbeat with hopeful -- albeit open-ended -- endings.

Do you write crossovers?

Yeah! For Whatever We Lose is actually a crossover with The Pacific, and I'd love to do more crossovers in the future

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yep! I've deleted the comments, but some people were VERY ANGRY about the background Babe/Roe content in LAGLAM -- you know, despite the fact that the plot of the fic is driven by a queer woman's decision to cross-dress. Guess they had to draw the line somewhere, but the hypocrisy of it all makes me chuckle

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Kinda? I deleted most of it from the original LAGLAM drafts and instead just alluded to it, but things are going to be different in FWWL. Get ready for crappy ocean metaphors and religious imagery, babes!

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I hope not :( That would stink

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not to my knowledge

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I think it would be fun!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Everlark! (said while frothing at the mouth because they make me go insane) I've been obsessed with them since I first read The Hunger Games at age 9. I could write you a whole novel about why I think they're perfect together, but I'll spare you the ramble (unless anyone wants it?)

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Tears in my eyes when I tell you that it's probably the requests in my inbox. I keep telling myself that I'll get to them, but I've just felt unmotivated with all the stuff I've had going on in my personal life/at school. I really really do hope to get to them someday, though, because some of them will be really fun to write

What are your writing strengths?

I have no clue, lol. I tend to get compliments about how I describe settings, so I'm gonna say that!

What are your writing weaknesses?

My abuse of commas and italics.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Personally, I love doing it. Especially in a fic like LAGLAM, where even though most people don't speak the language I'm using (Cherokee), I feel like they can still see the importance to the characters and to the story. And I like tricking people into caring about Indigenous language preservation. My teachers told me that anything can be a vessel for carrying language on, and by God, I took that to heart

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Oh boy. I was in the fifth grade. I had won many writing competitions. Two classmates approached me and told me that they wished The Hunger Games had more post-Mockingjay Everlark content, and that since I was a good writer, they wanted me to write it. I was traded many cosmic brownies and other such snacks throughout the year for my services in providing my classmates with Everlark fics on pages of notebook paper that are probably crumpled up in a landfill by now. At the time, I had no idea I was writing fanfiction, but it was the start of my favorite hobby. Look at me now, baby!

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to?

I've always wanted to write for TURN: Washington's Spies but have never had the courage haha

What's your favorite fic you've written?

I have a couple of one-shots that I'm pretty pleased with, but currently I'm going to say LAGLAM because it's been so special to me <3

Tagging (but no pressure!): @almost-a-class-act @latibvles @footprintsinthesxnd @liebgotts-lovergirl

[ecofinisher]

It is stated that AI will give you the desired result if you describe your wish in detail enough. This is what I got 😂

You have a new addition of adding a second image and somehow combine it..

With and without "change background" I liked the first shot if it. I saw the second picture and had a different idea, then changed the description, so that the "third arm" would disappear. It didn't work, so I removed krea's own description and described the whole image step by steel on how I imagined it should look like in the end.

It had gotten worse, so I rewrote a few sentences making sure "it was only 1 man and 1 woman" did it work?

Y.....not really....I guess I should mention their body weight, but.....why suddenly change that proportion? 😂

Switched the background, added the same image (The clothed one) edited the description, things still looking odd. (Ok I forgot to remove the bathtub part to see what happens 😂)

The last image, before my shots got all used. This is not what I wanted, but still sweet. The clothing doesn't fit 100% the scene, but let us say.....they're somewhere by a hotel with a pool, it's morning and a cold to be less dressed. AI notably struggles at some aspects in terms of human anatomy, it's probably gonna take a while for it to get fixed. For private use, it's okay, professionally (I'm no photographer, Animator or anything, just a random user) I'd say, it needs some improvements, depending for what you want it. I did already have some cool results with the page, I can't lie.

That's all. I just wanted to share the weirdness somewhere else instead of erasing it. 😅

[zippverschluss]

ep 9 notes

haven't checked the tag yet, need to sort through / document my thoughts first.

i'm a bit... disappointed, i guess? but i think that's owed to my expectations. after a week of collective theorizing i was (not so) secretly hoping for a sauruman VS gandalf style face off and so what we got felt a bit... pedestrian?

so i guess the gardener did hurt him after all, just not the 'shears-in-your-body' kind of inury? i honestly thought he'd stick to stalking.

speaking of which, i'll be disappointed if it's really garden dude using nayeon and not the other way round. nayeon being skilled in black magic and just using / playing men left and right to reach her own various ends and satisfy her needs would have elevated the character immensely. feels a bit disrespectful tbh.

speaking of disrespect, i suspected as much, but still... how can they have the mother not know? like honestly? how can her asshole husband tell the woman his son just broke up with about the illness but not his wife? i reeeaaally want hj to hex him... like, make him step on a lego everyday of his life. or have shampoo get into his eyes. something like that.

back in ep. 3 when sy saw hj in the dress and just last episode, we focused on his right hand. same happend during the proposal scene in ep. 5 and yesterday in the hospital with nayeon. i guess that holds significance?

were sy and ny ever intimate with each other?

i liked how they filmed the nightmare hj had.

also, how ambigious jg still feels. though i'm leaning towards ally who hasn't realized yet that he missed his shot. (also, does jg know the mayor is dirty? the mayor is dirty, right? playing footsie with the haum ceo? is that why he poached sy? to take on the mayor? and if he doesn't know, doesn't that just really undercut his character?)

did garden dude hit sy with some magic to make him black out? did that magic bring back his past memories? i thought he remembered when he woke up in the hospital.

but then i really don't understand the artistic decision process behind the scene in front of the hospital. that scene made (makes) me think i must be mistaken? how can he remember loving / killing her 300 years ago and the first thing he asks about is the in house messenger? (yeah, i know, he wanted her to go back on her word...) but even if he wanted to not let on, where were the longing / pining / loving eyes from last episode? the whole thing just felt very bland and weird.

also, poor rowoon. they obvs. didn't find hospital pants long enoug for him.

also, pls. don't push sick / hospitalized people. you don't know what tubes / needles they have sticking in or out of them. drama writers, find other ways to initiate physical touch. (just as lazy as drunk alley dude in ep 2).

i cared about ma and go for the first time. that scene was funny. i don't appreciate that once again show insinuates that a man is needed to keep a home in order, but since ma is freshly divorced it is plausible. for a moment i thought he was gonna choke her out or pass out himself. lol

also, re the hug, 'what kind of man asks that beforehand?'. the kind that respects boundaries and gives you the chance to say no? uncool ma, uncool show.

i guess no tentative friendships at work, but passive-aggressiveness?

loved the fireworks and the traditional music. was my favourite part of the episode. that slapped. wished they would have kept that music for the romantic scene.

there's still the option that him wholeheartedly embracing his feelings for hj brought upon the past memories. in which case that must be one long-ass hug. still, i'd prefer that scenario over the hospital-dream one. embracing his feelings because he remembers cheapens it a bit imo. its prob. the latter though seeing how he asked his mom about past lives.

his parents' bickering is getting on my nerves.

this episode felt really disjointed. i understand the cuts / edits were to not reveal too much, but at this point i'm just really annoyed by it.

for that reason bridge scene didn't have the impact it prob. should have had since i wasn't really sure what was going on?

spell scene too short, dress not as strange / pretty. but loved the music. also, what spell did she use? seduction?

i liked the child actors surprisingly much. i liked it even more that already as a child she had shaman capabilities.

i know tall people fall in love too, but man those hugs looked uncomfortable.

there's many other thoughts in my head but lastly: i guess only him remembers the past out of the two of them. i don't like that. at all. after 8 episodes it finally felt like they were on somewhat even footing when it came to knowledge about magic, spells, curses.... having only him remember once again means he knows more and is the proactive one, whereas she is only reacting and being driven by him. (but, if only him remembers, how can we as an audience see the things that only she can know? being brought to the shaman as a child? her premunition of the bloody hand?)

on that note, i hope the next kiss is initiated by hj. would be nice to see her express her desires / feelings. 3 kisses in and it's always him planting one on her. reciprocity is hot!! gimme gimme gimme!

[dogfags]

i think my life would be better if I didn't mind they/them being used on me but it quite honestly feels like an insult sometimes when people assume those are my pronouns or they think I look weird and androgynous so they default to those. I know I am weird and androgynous but it's just annoying to have to be like no I'm just.. a man. when I have put so much effort into passing and going stealth. and for sure even tho I'm just a man I have some weird nonbinary feelings as well. bc I'm trans and being "binary trans" doesn't mean u don't have a complicated relationship with gender or experience a bit of gender queerness. I mean I identified and lived as a lesbian for several years of my life so ofc a part of that is ingrained in me. idk, I kind of wish more people would look at gender as something you do rather than something you innately are. I don't think I innately am anything. I think I used to live as a girl and now I live as a man. maybe that makes me nonbinary or maybe that just makes me a normal person. idk. a lot of the trans narratives that have been popularized by the media are just so unrelatable to me I almost don't consider myself the same thing as them. I don't think I transitioned bc I was a boy born into a girl's body I think I transitioned bc I'd just rather live as a man and so I am. of course I also have debilitating dysphoria but yk. I don't think I was "born this way" and I didn't show any signs as a child or even give my gender a second thought until I was older. I got a taste of female puberty and was like nah I'd rather opt out of this whole woman thing. so I did. and now I'm a man. it's that simple to me idk.

but yeah if I liked he/they I think it would make my life better bc then I wouldn't be like. dysphoric and offended when ppl would default to they for me simply bc I have green hair. I don't even dress femininely almost ever it's just the hair I think lmao. or bc my name is gender neutral. I guess I am androgynous in the face also. I do not have a chiseled jawline although I do have a mustache and it is pretty dark now. idkkkkk man

I've lived so many lives already in just this one that idk how to classify myself anymore. I've been every letter of the LGBT and dated/fucked someone of every gender and sexuality lmao. but I still think it's kinda annoying when ppl deny my masculinity or maleness upon seeing me and default to they/them when I Try So Hard to pass. obviously it's not their fault, they've been told it's rude to assume anyone's pronouns and I am fully self aware of the way I look and come off. I almost feel like I can't even correct people when they call me they bc I know they're just trying to be.. nice or something. like how would I even go about correcting that, "thanks for the consideration but I am in fact just a man" ???

I think in terms of gender identity I can get behind the vibes of he/they being used for me in theory, but in practice it makes me feel like a freak. it's like a glaring neon sign that's like, you look WEIRD and idk what you are bc you're WEIRD. I know this shit wouldn't happen if I was cis and presented exactly the same as I do now. I feel extremely vulnerable and almost outed when people call me they. like it tells everyone in the room that I'm Different. and despite the fact I dye my hair crazy colors and have 7 facial piercings and stretched ears I actually do not want to stick out. I just love the alternative look. but I don't want attention drawn to me. I don't want people to look at or talk to me. it's a struggle I've had my entire life. id much rather blend in than stand out but literally everybody knows who I am and my name bc I just have an appearance that is so jarring. ugh.

I even had my instructor for some reason "correct" himself on my pronouns, he literally got it right the first time then went "er, they-" like ??? come on man. when have I ever told anyone I want to go by they here??? is the mustache not enough?? do I have to grow out my patchy ass stubble as well??? for a split second sometimes I think about going by he/they and then I am called they in real life and cringe so hard. rahhh.

[allamericansbitch]

hey Sarah!! first of all i just want to say how glad i am that i follow you, swiftie tumblr can get very echo chamber and you definitely have a way of mixing it up lol.

My feelings on TTPD are... complicated, so it's nixe to have a perspective in my life that's not "oh my god put this in the louvre" or "taylor swift is an evil awful demon lady" because that black & white is very much what i'm stuck with IRL and online.

When it comes to the album itself I personally do like it, and a lot of that has to do with me thinking of it more like folklore/evermore. It's like that fiction writing with the more raw, uncut, messy feelings of something like Speak Now. I don't read these songs as being about her life in her traditional diary kind of way, but i totally get why people do and why that would sour it for them. I am also a fan of the sonic choices but again... i get not being lol.

Where I started having eeeehhhh feelings about TTPD was with the Fortnight video, which you've spoken about. Complicated feelings for me. I like some of the visual choices like the office thing and the outdoors and the black and white but the mental hospital thing just was weird. Especially the ect which at this point you've gone into at length and I agree with you on it being bad. For me it (an asylum) doesn't even really make sense as a visual choice for the song or the album. I love Florence + The Machine, I love Dance Fever and I love How Big, How Blue, How Beautiful and I was excited that TTPD gave me the vibes of Taylor dabbling with that. And then instead she did the hospital thing. Not what I want to be the remembered visual piece of this era but I guess that's what she's going with :/

Which then brings us to the TTPD set on the eras tour which is the most I've been in agreement with you about the ick factor. I give Taylor a lot of grace, and I have over the years. Something about my being a young woman who has made bad choices which can be partially attributed to having grown up in a weird mix of both sheltered and traumatized just makes me feel for her on that level. But the asylum thing on stage is just a bad choice.

waolom is a song i like despite it's use of asylum as a metaphor for fame, not because of it. would've much rather seen that and icdiwabh have circus vibes. we know girlie loves a golden cage. fortnite should just bring that florence welch dancing around in a pretty dress energy that the folklore & evermore sets were giving, full stop. bdilh is a song i like as a kind of different take on love story and i wish she would've rolled with that and given it comedic fantasy vibes. (personally i'd love to see a full commitment to 80's princess bride esque cheesy-ness. i like taylor the most when she just leans into being cringe melodramatically) And frankly? I wish that'd been the whole TTPD set. I don't like the smallest man or so high school as songs, they're the weakest on the who double album for me along with thank you aimee. They don't need to be preformed on that giant ass stage at the expense of some actually solid pieces from other eras.

I really really think that if absolutely nothing else, bare minimum, that bed stage piece & the nurse outfits need to go. Are they going to? probably not. Unfortunately she's 'just like me fr' in having to learn her lessons the hard way, so i'm sure she'll play it up and put it on merch or whatever then look back in a year or more like yikes! Which is disappointing.

I don't know this kinda just turned into ranting because I feel like you're a person who will understand and respect my perspective enough to not belittle me for having complicated, confused feelings. So thanks for that, and even when I don't totally agree with your opinions please know there's one swiftie out there who understands and respects them enough to not pick anon fights over it.

Hope your day goes well and that Taylor has someone actually tell her that this is Not It to her face soon. 💖

aw thank you! yeah i completely get everything you said here. the whole mental hospital, asylum, etc stuff is just.... unnecessary and completely avoidable, there's no ties to it in the album and makes no sense to include it with such heavy-handedness. her continuing the whole circus theme throughout the entire ttpd era on tour would've been a great idea actually and would've really sealed the whole overdramatic, satire thing she's trying to go for (which is another reason the mental health aesthetic isn't working, you cant mix something serious with satire/overdramatic ideas it just wont work). it would've been really interesting to have the entire thing be a cohesive circus theme instead of just one/two songs.