#i got the perfect song it's so beautiful i'm crying it matches so well with them 😭

[papicup]

Nah , What if actually i cried

" end then begins " (ending line of animatic)

(This is karma i get . When the angst finally caughts up to it's author 😭

when will i get this OVER so everyone can know the reason and SEE 😭)

GET OUT OF MY HEAD AND PASTE YOURSELF INTO ART

[divine0rdainment]

SNEAK PEAK in to Operation Replace Lilith

(not the full chapter, just a few paragraphs. I will warn you, I'm keeping up Adam being a dick in this, so don't be surprised)

Chapter 1

Back to the Garden

The first thing Adam sees when he opens his eyes is the bright blue sky. He blinks and covers his eyes, groaning in pain. Fuck, where the hell was he? Wasn't he just in hell? With Lucifer and his bitch daughter…and then he felt…pain in his back and Lute was there…crying? Lute never cries. Why would she be…oh God!

He suddenly sat up and gasped, panic hitting him hard as he touched his chest looking down. And he sees, believe it or not, that he is naked. Weird. Why was he naked? And why did he have abs instead of his well earned beer belly?! He was also skinnier than he had been in a few hundred years, and without every single one of his scars. His chest hair was also greatly reduced, which, felt violating. His skin was even darker. He hadn't been tan since he became an executioner and started wearing his helmet and gloves. When the fuck had this happened? Where was he?!

His now Amber eyes gaze around the area and he sees he is resting on a patch of soft light green grass, in a small valley next to two large Bluffs on one side, a extending forest on the other, and in-between the two bluffs layed a small waterfall creating a beautifully perfect pond full of shimmering water, cleaner than he's seen in a millenia.

He gulped as he slowly came to remembered this place. His birth place, the clay from that river, and the dirt from this grass made him. In the literal sense. He was “Birthed” from this very patch of grass. And if he was here, then…so should she be.

His amber eyes turn to see golden hair sprayed out across the grass, The soft ivory skin almost glowed in the sunlight from above. Her eyes were closed, but Adam knew when she opened them, they would be a soft green color that matched the leaves that grow with wisteria flowers. And her voice would sound like that of the most beautiful song birds. Lilith. The woman who started it all, the woman who chose the Devil over him.

God above why?! Why was he here again?! Why was she?! Slowly he got to his feet and backed up from her in a panic. However, his legs were slightly weaker than he anticipated, and he fell backwards, groaning as his ass fell on the grass. On the upside, the grass here was softer than any grass you would find on earth. So it didn't hurt too bad.

“Fuck!" He groaned, not really in pain but the shock of falling still upset him. He looked down at the other and glaired at the woman as she opens her eyes at his yell of shock. The woman looked at him with her beautiful eyes. Eyes he had once thought he would happily look into for eternity. He was naive back then tho. He knew better now.

Her eyes were wider in Eden than they were last they met. They oddly matched her daughter's when she was this naive and innocent. He recognized them immediately when he first met Charlie at that meeting. Made him want to antagonize her and dismiss her. She was so bright and optimistic and full of hope…he hated it Because it reminded him of who Lilith used to be, but less…independent. And far less bratty too.

She slowly sits up, glancing over Adam, and after a moment, she spoke “I…I am Lilith…” she said, practicing her speech. She smiles and touched her lips, giggling. She did that the first time too, so amazed by her own voice. Fucking full of herself, or so Adam thought. Her voice wasn't THAT great. Yeah it was literally made by angels, but come on, there are BETTER ones. " I-i am Lilith the first woman!" She declared then leans closer to Adam, who quickly backed up against the grass. “Who are you?" She called. She had done this last time too. Curious and excited to be alive. He was too, he remembered. He thought she was the prettiest flower in the garden at one point. But that thought was long since died. It wasn't coming back now just because he's back at the begining. Fuck that.

“Adam…first man..” he grumbled, his tone showing his displeasure at ‘meeting’ her. He looked away from her and attempted to stand again. When he holds out his arms to make sure he doesn't fall, he sighs, stabilizing and then, when he is ready, starts walking towards the forest. Where was he going? He didn't really know. North, if he remembered right, towards the heaven entrance into the garden.

Lilith frowned, and tried to stand too. “W-wait! Where are you-" she stumbled and falls down, whinpering in pain as she put all her weight in her knees in the stumble. She couldn't get up fast enough to catch up with him. “A-Adam! Wait for me! Please!" But Adam didn't wait. Fuck that bitch, she can take care of herself. And so could he. She was always so independent after all, she didn't need him now. He needed to figure out what the ever loving fuck was going on!

(To see the rest you'll have to wait till I post ;)

[doodle-do-wop]

KOTLC AND PJO

@valentinerose529 passed on the brain rot so now I'm dragging y'all down with me

Please buckle up your non-existent seatbelts and keep all hands, wings, feet, tails, and horns inside the vehicle. This is gonna be a long post

So

As I've previously stated else where I firmly stick my foot in the hill that the Aphrodite Cabin (10) has so much more under the surface of pink and glitter (not that there's anything wrong with pink and glitter)

Aphrodite is quite literally the Goddess of Love if you're a PJO fan and don't know Greek mythology or you're a fan but completely forgot.

She has an ever changing form to each individual as well as an ever changing personality (in the PJO universe) due to beauty standards and the culture of the place she's in.

Love is complicated and messy, it's not the same for everyone or every situation.

Thus why I put Keefe in good old 10. What a better place for an empath than the Aphrodite Cabin?

Now moving onto the ever messy Vackers

I love Fitz and Biana. I do............but I got an entire skeleton of bones to pick with Alden Vacker and of he can meet me outside the Denny's parking lot please-

While not actually smart Alden did manage to become emissary in KOTLC and Athena seems to like mildly smart guys who end up being very mid dad's. Girls got a type and I can only say hopes and prayers she gets better.

Athena is a strategist and occasionally thinks only in the form of a game (I will be using chess). Athena knows when it's time to get sharp and wet the blade and move people to where they have to go. She may be immortal but time is still against her so chop chop guys, we've got a magical meguiffin to snatch and bring back.

Athena is the goddess of wisdom, war strategy, handicraft.

What better godly parent to leave an ever lasting shadow on the eldest son Alvar. And the bitterness that stems from being out shined by perfect child Fitz who developed a far more impressive power than his older brother.

"but Biana feels so Aphrodite coded!" You cry and I hear you but Biana is a fighter at heart. She likes winning Quest Hunt and tackling the shit out of people in Tackle Bramble (she would love rugby). She's competitive and clever though it's not clear where on earth that gene came from, clearly not Alden.

And let's not forget it was Biana's idea to turn shirt ruffles into weapon hiding spots. Girls got strategy and style. Athena would be proud.

(plus the absolute sandal that would be blowing up the Camp's gossip train of Biana potentially being Aphrodite's daughter dispite having two Athena brothers would be scalding hot)

Onto everyone's favorite technopath

"oh Hephaestus, we all know" well you're wrong bucko

Worm, germs, plotted plant I named Timmy. What has Dex Dizznee built so far? Bombs, multiple bracelets for punching, many devices used just to heck the government's most top secret files, a panic button/tracker, more devices that hack into the government's files, a circuit that shall not be discussed.

These are all pretty crazy cool shit and Hephaestus would be damn proud to have Dex as his son.

But Dex isn't his son.

Dex's dad is the father of thieves, travelers, and roads. Hermes

"WHAT?" Yeah I know I know. But think about it. Dex is smart, he's so damn smart but he's tricky too. He knows the chemicals needed to dye an imp pink with glittery nails to match, he can whip up a batch up balding blam to get revenge, he can also be easily lost in the background of things.

So what a major disappointment it must be, to be waiting any day now for the sign of the hammer in a blazing forge and get a stupid winged sandal instead.

The Song Twins

Tam and Linh really gave me a run for my money because they're twins but Linh is an obvious Poseidon kid while Tam isn't and however powerful and weird the gods may be, two gods can't have kids with the same woman at the same time. It just ain't possible.

Linh's water powers are important to her character but so are Tam's. But Tam can still have spooky powers just not in the same flavor. Linh is the pretty side of Poseidon's rule over the seas. The water that heals and the funny animal shapes she makes. But the deeper into the ocean you get the darker it becomes. Tam's powers are the less pleasant things in life.

Now for everyone's second favorite arsonist (not Sophie)

Marella Redek has Pyrokenisis and you're saying "oh this one's eazy, Leo, come pick up your sibling" but you're wrong yet again my friend.

While Marella would probably be super frustrated with getting the tinker cabin over something that could help her mom (y'all remember how helping her mom was her main motivation?) at least with the STEM geeks she could hammer out some kind of magic mood ring to help her mom or make a bracelet with charmed gemstones capable of alerting her mom or herself when danger is near or just something

But no

Instead Marella is stuck in the only cabin that couldn't have been a worst match up for her. Hecate. (I know I previously said Ares but I changed my mind)

Marella, instead of having a knack for magic like almost every other child of Hecate instead got the flaming torch part of the deal. Literally. Marella can also see strings of magic and she doesn't like it one bit.

And finally Sophie (because this is getting too long)

Sophie was a tricky one since she has all these powers and it was nearly impossible to put her in a cabin that really fit with her

What finally got me to decide was actually her teleporting powers and inflicting. They have a sort of lightning and thunder styled description so who better than lord thunderbutt himself, Zeus.

[philhoffman]

This week's Monday Philm is Magnolia (1999), dir. Paul Thomas Anderson, which has been on my mind for a while. I haven't watched it in over a year but small things keep reminding me of it—songs, actors I see in other projects, lines and ideas.

It turned out to be a perfect film for Yom Kippur, too. YK is the holiest day of the year and it's all about teshuvah—repentance and atonement, reflecting on the year and seeking forgiveness. That matches up well with the themes in Magnolia: "We might be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us." Every character is so lonely, everyone has done wrong or been wronged or both, everyone is dealing with the past that ties them together and won't let them go.

We fast for 25 hours to reach a higher level of spirituality—to put aside human needs like food and sex, to be more like angels—which reminds me of what PSH said about his angelic nurse: "[Phil Parma] probably has problems, but Phil’s not gonna be worrying about his skeleton in his closet because he’s got someone dying in front of him… He might’ve gotten in a fight with some girl a week ago, he said the wrong thing, it bothers him, but the next day he’s showing up at work at Earl Partridge’s house… It’s very selfless. He’s really putting himself aside for other people and therefore pretty much enriching himself."

Magnolia always makes me emotional, apparently even more so when I'm tired and hungry and otherwise afflicted. Burst into tears when Linda comes home and yells at Phil Parma for being on the phone, not because she hits him or because it's so intense or because they're both crying—but because the scene is filmed entirely over his shoulder and I was sad we couldn't see his face. PTA put so much of Phil Hoffman into Phil Parma, it's even easier to miss him when you watch it. I just wanted to see more of his sad, beautiful face.

[hildyj]

Fuck it, let me rank my 10/10, perfect, best of all time, no-skip album: Ram by Paul and Linda McCartney

12. Ram On (Reprise)

This one was pretty easy to place in last place, cause it's a 55 second reprise of another song on the album, sounding mostly like some quick studio improvisation. Charming but forgettable compared to the rest of the album.

11. Eat At Home

The McCartneys' tribute to oral sex - I think(!). Softly rocking and poppy. Something to bop your head to and allow you to come up for breath from the rest of this amazing album. I especially love how they turn the word "love" into a 10-syllable word.

10. Heart Of The Country

A real toe-tapping crowd-pleaser. McCartney using all of his tricks as a writer of pop songs to charm you.

9. Smile Away

Silly but it always brings a snile to my face. I love the condensed and rocking soundscape - makes me feel like I'm sitting in smokey music club in 1958.

8. 3 Legs

A blues-y number that sounds like it's been recorded backwards and then played in reverse. Simple but I love it.

7. Ram On

Paul McCartney doing the whole indie ukuele girl thing about 40 years before the invention of youtube. Ethereal and elemental.

6. Too Many People

A great opener to the album. The lyrics are so bitchy and condescending that *I* feel attacked, and my name isn't even John Lennon. "Now what can be done for you?" - Imagine your closest friend and song-writing partner saying that to you after your band broke up. And an amazing guitar solo as well. What did you say about granny music, Lennon?

5. Uncle Albert/Admiral Halsey

I just love the transition between the two halves, from staccato strings to honky-tonk piano, perfectly matching and also provoking the listener to sit up and pay attention. And why do Uncle Albert and Admiral Halsey fit so well? The first is melancholy, the second is rousing. Maybe it's because the McCartneys' infectious sense of humour is a rich seam running through all of it.

4. Monkberry Moon Delight

It's complete nonsense but completely infectious. And Paul's vocal performance is amazing. Why is he like that? How can he do everything?

3. The Back Seat Of My Car

Listen, it's my personal theory that Queen as a band would never have existed if it hadn't been for this song doing the tonal-shifting rock opera before they even got started. It's probably bullshit and shows a complete ignorance of rock history, but there it is. But listen to Paul building up into the Freddie scream, around the 3 minute and 20 sec mark and tell me you don't hear the basic ingredients that created 1970s rock as a genre.

2. Dear Boy

The most beautiful diss track in existence. The unfolding harmonies between Paul and Linda have to be heard through head-phones to be fully appreciated. It makes me feel like I'm floating, it makes me feel like crying, it makes me feel like spitting Linda's ex-husband in the face. It's an absolutely beautiful piece of work.

Long Haired Lady

Linda finally takes centre stage and she's great. I love the back and forth between the two of them and how their voices complement each other - Paul being the perfect crooning troubadour, singing about his beautiful lady, while Linda brings it back down to earth with slightly comical, nasal tones, demanding the guy to actually be precise in what this perfect love means to him. And then the second part - The Second Part! The Love Is Long part. The building, freeing, flying, expanding part, filling your heart until you're sure it's going to burst. I want to live the rest of my life in the final two minutes of this song, immersing myself in absolute beauty.

[aroace-poly-show]

Ha llegado el tiempo más esperada del país! La hora de la miseria en la cueva del homosexual :D

I feel overly annoying and confident so I decided to make you an analysis on why Eight by Sleeping at Last would make a beautiful hw song. I always imagined it a good Nene com, but since it doesn't quite match the music box event, maybe it'll serve you as inspiration for another one? Also Google isn't showing me the lyrics so I'm going to write them myself with extra emotionality✨, sorry about that.

Putting the lines colour coded for the characters and blue if I have no idea.

I remember the minute

it was like a switch was flipped

I was just a kid

Nene upon realising she forgot her words, completely alone in a hall full of people staring at her.

Who grew up strong enough to pick this armor on

And suddenly it fit

A LOT OF THINGS. Could be Tsukasa giving into his role of a people pleaser to make Saki and everyone around him happier at his expense, could be Emu giving up her "childish" behaviour after the Wonder Stage was closed off, could be Rui accepting that he is a monster and coming to live as a loner.

And god that was so long ago, long ago, long ago...

Nene and Rui. Do I even need to clarify?

I was weak and perfectly naive

And I grew up too quick

All of them honestly. What happened with Hollow Wonderland and having to give up their childhood to soon?

Now you won't see all that I have to lose

And all I've lost in the fight to protect it

Emukasa, constantly giving up, constantly fighting, yet so completely lost in the dark.

I won't let you in, I swore never again

I can't afford, no, I refuse to be rejected

Ruinene but actually all of them more or less, especially the fear of rejection part.

I want to break these bones 'til they're better

I want to break them right and feel alive

Ruikasa coded, to me. Rui who needs to be fixed just like the robots he fixes. Tsukasa who'd run his blood dry if it meant Saki could go out of the hospital.

You were wrong, you were wrong, you were wrong

My healing needed more than time

EMU. EMU WHO NEVER GOT TIME TO GRIEVE HER GRANDPA, EMU WHO NEVER HAD ENOUGH TIME TO HEAL OVER THE WONDER STAGE AND NOW SHE DOES BUT IT'S STILL SO SO LONELY AND WEIRD FOR HER TO EXPRESS EMOTIONS.

When I see fragile things, helpless things, broken things

I see the familiar

Something about Nene writing songs that capture the feelings of all those who were never let themselves cry. Something about Emu recognising Mafuyu's smile as something horrid because she's seen it before. Something about Tsukasa's lyrics always sounding like bedtime lullabies that he never got to hear. Something about Rui seeing the loneliness both of them hoard, a dim light in their eyes too familiar to forget.

I was little, I was weak, I was perfect, too

Now I'm a broken mirror

Could be anyone honestly this fits too well.

But I can't let you see all that I have to lose

All I've lost in the fight to protect it

I can't let you in, I swore never again

I can't afford to let myself be blindsided

All of them once again but can I just say HOW MUCH THE ATMOSPHERE CHANGES FROM THE FIRST ONE?? THEY'RE BEGINNING TO BE VULNERABLE YET THEY STILL RECOIL AT THE TOUCH, THEY DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE YET THEY FEAR PRESENCE MORE THAN ANYTHING. IS THIS ANYTHING. DOES ANYONE HEAR ME?

I'm standing guard, I'm falling apart

And all I want is to trust you

COULD BE RUI BUT COULD ALSO BE EMUNENE. JUST IMAGINE A VERY SAD EMU IN SMILE OF A DREAMER, CLOSE TO CRYING AS SHE HIDES AWAY, AND NENE COMING IN TO CARE FOR HER. IMAGINE THE TRUST. IMAGINE IT'S FAULTS.

Show me how to lay my sword down

For long enough to let you through

TSUKASA WITH THE SWORD OF THE KNIGHT PROTECTING THOSE HE LOVES AT HIS OWN EXPENSE. RUI WITH THE SWORD HE WAS GIVING A BIRTH — HE WAS BORN A WEAPON AND A MONSTER. ONCE AGAIN: TRUST. THE KIND OF "PLEASE SHOOT ME AND HOLD ME IN YOUR ARMS AS I DIE BECAUSE I CAN'T SAVE MYSELF AND I WON'T FORGIVE MYSELF IF I HURT YOU" TRUST. THE RUIKASA TRUST.

Here I am, pry me open

What do you want to know?

I'm just a kid

RUIEMU RUIEMU I CAN'T EXPLAIN BUT JUST— TWO KIDS WHO'S CHILDHOOD WAS RIPPED AWAY FOR BEING OSTRACIZED FOR SOMETHING THAT WASN'T THEIR FAULT.

Who grew up scared enough

To hold the door shut

And bury my innocence

NENEKASA. I know Tsukasa doesn't have anxiety nor anything close to it, but holding the door shut could be a way to show him staying at home while his parents spend their time with his dying sister. Alone in his room. Scared of monsters under his bed no one else will ever get to see because no one has walked into the house in more time he can measure.

But here's a map, here's a shovel

Here's my Achilles' heel

SOBBING HEAD IN HANDS STOMPING ON THE FLOOR BLOOD AND GUTS ALL OVER THE PLACE AS I SMASH MY SKULL INTO LITTLE PIECES THEY MAKE ME SO ILL

I'm all in, palms out

I'm at your mercy now and I'm ready to begin

The found family. The found FAMILY DUDE I CAN'T

I am strong, I am strong, I am strong enough

To let you IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN

They have healed thanks to each other and now they're ready to take on the world.

I'LL SHAKE THE GROUND WITH AAAALL MY MIGHT

AND I WILL PULL MY WHOLE HEART UP TO THE SURFACE

NENE. NENE.

For the innocent, for the vulnerable

And I'll show up on the front lines with a purpose.

For the innocent goes to Emu for having to bury her own self in the backyard with tears in her eyes and mud under her nails. The vulnerable goes to Rui because he never got to be vulnerable with anyone but the one's he Rui-ned (never making that pun again). Because he was a born monster and monster don't have any feelings, so what's the point? And the "front lines with a purpose" part goes to Tsukasa because... Wow he finally found why he likes theatre so much, didn't he?

And I'll give all I have:

I'll give my BLOOD, I'll give my SWEAT

AND AN OCEAN OF TEARS WILL SPILL FOR WHAT IS BROKEN

ALL OF THEM SINGING IT TOGETHER PLEASE. THEY HAVE SACRIFICED SO MUCH AND GOT SO LITTLE, NOW THEY'RE WILLING TO TRY AGAIN AND SACRIFICE THEMSELVES FOR EACH OTHER.

I'm shattered porcelain

Glued back together again

INVINCIBLE like we've never been

What's that thing about filling your cracks with gold? What's that thing about fireflies shining in the dark of night? Yeah that thing.

ksdhjffd HI HELLO WELCOME. THIS IS SO FUCKING GOOD rotating this in my brain oh my god. i have some little notes on some lines that also mean a lot to me for other characters btw

“But I can't let you see all that I have to lose/ All I've lost in the fight to protect it “

^ this one feels also ruicore. as in protecting nene. nene is all he really has left to lose. yk.

“I'm standing guard, I'm falling apart/And all I want is to trust you/Show me how to lay my sword down/For long enough to let you through”

^ tsukasa fucking tenma who needs to be taught vulnerability is A Thing he’s allowed to do

“And I'll show up on the front lines with a purpose.” <- i have nothing to add for this one it’s so tsukasa but i just need to let you know how much i LOVE THIS LINE. also your rui-ned pun was awful i hope you do it again /silly

anyway. ourdfghfsggfdhjjksagjhfgfdfhdf oh this is good. this is very very good. this is so rumdfjhgsjms,admfghafngfsd. i need to be put down thank you for sending this de tu cueva homosexual /silly

[eternal-armin]

Hello I was wondering what are your headcannons for y/n marrying Jean ?

hello! ooh, [y/n] marrying jean, i like your style. this is a little long. jean isn't my cup of tea (i prefer the tall glass of water that is armin) but i loved writing this. and i hope you love reading it, darling <3333

[y/n] and jean would definitely accidentally propose to each other at the same time. like, during a dinner, they both get down on one knee. and he gets flustered, like "hey! i wanted to be the one to propose!!" but will say yes.

the rings aren't the grandest, but he meticulously chose metals and gemstones that meant love, eternal love, etc. and when that ring was on your finger, you felt like you had been reborn. it was the same with jean.

during the entirety of the engagement, he fawned over you. he already did everything for you, but somehow he did even more for you. you tried to do everything for him too. it felt like the beginnings of your relationship again; eros love, affectionate and childish and completely pure. god, everyone noticed, and he bragged about it soooo much. like, always holding your hand, looking at the rings on your fingers, going on and on about marrying you. it was more funny than anything. and your friends actually loved hearing it. mostly, they were just "it's about time, man."

jean would have the actual ceremony be small. close friends/family only, no eren allowed, the usual. but the party following the ceremony would be absolutely huge. like, giant cake, dance floor, dj, flower accents, gorgeous outdoor area, full buffet- he would go all the way. everyone comes to the party because it is absolutely dope. some people are just not allowed inside but the majority party hard, including you two.

probably would have tear-off sleeves on his wedding tux.

nah i'm just kidding. for your wedding, he is surprisingly serious and very romantic, incredibly sweet too. a little goofy because his humor is one of your favorite things about him. his vows express that through and through; they are heartfelt and well-written and honestly almost make you cry in front of the officiant. and he would wipe away your tears, almost crying himself. (he probably got some help from your friends to write them, but all the sentiments were his & his alone.)

scoffs when you point out he's crying. "i'm not. it's just- i dunno, pollen." "you're not allergic to pollen, jean."

you and him spent months perfecting every detail. more often than not, everything was prepared by your friends, to give it the truest vibe of 'yours' as possible. sasha handled the food, mikasa the flowers, annie the budget and scenery, conny the guest list, armin the music and decor, etc. and you were both so, so nervous the day before because any small mistake would be dreadful- or, that's what it felt like. but when you walked down the aisle, and he saw you walking down, you knew the day was perfect.

you both spent weeks perfecting your first dance together, and even got a professional choreographer to teach you the dance. and it was so fun. the cheers after the flawless dance on the actual day made all the work worth it, but it was a match to a fire compared to the look in his eyes and the hug he gave you.

your closest friends made toasts during the after party. some did short speeches, a few played a song together. whatever it was, it was beautiful, and you and jean didn't stop hugging for the entire day.

now, this is an sfw blog, so i can't talk about the wedding night. but i will talk about my headcanons for [y/n]'s wedding look, and jean's.

for if you wear a tux:

you spent a long time fretting over the shade that would look best. you had narrowed it down to three options, but couldn't lower it any more. and jean helped you. his feedback was perfect, and made you all the more confident.

you both went for tux colors which would match the other. like, a neutral eggshell white with a tucson red-orange (#a67b67 hex color specifically). the accents were in neutral shades. your hair was gently pulled back, with some framing your face; his was slicked back nice and easy. and not to mention that the rings matched the shades, as you both wanted.

when you got fitted, and you saw the finished look in the mirror, with your hair done and your face made, you started to cry. mikasa and the others you brought with you comforted you. you said it was nothing; just your dream coming true. every day, you would gaze at the tux, so excited to wear it.

and when you did, accessories on, hair done and face made again, and walked down the aisle, you suddenly felt even more confident in those clothes, perfect fitted to your body. jean saw you and his jaw really almost dropped. he knew you were going to look perfect but you looked perfect. and he didn't know, but you were thinking the same thing.

for if you wear a dress:

you fretted over the dress. the silhouette, the texture, should it have lace? should it have pearls? what kind of neckline? every question under the sun, you pondered over excessively. but eventually you came across an image of the perfect dress. seeing it, you simply... knew. you showed it to jean as 'just an option' (even though you knew it was The Dress™) and he fell in love with it too.

"just an option???" he asked. "should be the whole decision."

with your closest friends, you went to find the best wedding dress shop which carried something close. mikasa offered adding the things that the base dress did not have; you appreciated the offer. but instead asked if she could guide you while you did it yourself.

standing there in that near-perfect dress, you got teary-eyed. your friends rushed to your side, but you smiled. it was just... what you dreamed of, nothing else.

jean constantly asked questions about the dress you chose. but every time, you were just like "sorry, babe. gonna have to wait till the day of."

[moonandflowersfairy]

hi if you make one for me i would appreciate it

your personality

loyal, introverted, calm, most of the time I'm always smiling, but never and really I'm a very depressed person I don't like to show my true feelings to others, sometimes I lock myself in my room for days, sometimes I'm very manipulative a little sadistic , I know what I want and I don't abandon anyone, quite stubborn, I'm like a tsudare, sarcastic, I try to solve problems in the conversation if I'm not afraid to succeed in the fight, sometimes I end up pushing people away because I'm afraid of disappointment, I don't let people come easily into my life, but who isn't, I always do everything to protect, enthralled, I hardly sleep

-What do you look like

my sign and libra, I'm 1.60 tall,

brown hair that goes over the shoulder, but I always leave it up, brown eyes, I almost always wear baggy clothes because my breasts are big and I'm embarrassed when they look at me, I'm also insecure because I have a lot of high mutilation scars, sometimes sometimes i'm a bit perverted

-what do you like

music, books, quiet places, animals, horror and action movies, drawing, sewing, macabre things

do not like

crowded places, people, monotonous things, leaving the house, doing unnecessary things that won't yield anything, talking

- what are you looking for in a relationship,

someone loyal patient, who I know will always be by my side, who is not afraid to say what he wants and what he wants, but also respects my space, who doesn't care about my sadistic side, and my silence

gender preference too

male, except taijo, baji, nayoha, i'm not comfortable with them

-and any facts about you think might work ♡

I'm very loyal, and would always be there to support and listen, he would always try to show my true feelings.

well i think it might have been a little confused i don't know how to spread it well if you want you don't need to do more if you have to😊

I match you with...

¡! Kawata Souya ¡!

Why?

You and Souya would be a complimentary duo, whenever you feel down he would comfort you and viceversa, he loves you in every possible way no matter your mood. Your relationship would be based around intimacy and little, simple moments you both share.

general headcanons:

¡! SFW ¡!

you met at a Toman meeting, you were part of the 4th division and Nahoya was talking to you about being more present in fights and stop messing with your division's victory. Souya saw you very uncomfortable and decided to step in the conversation and give the message to you instead of his brother.

he then later started looking towards your way more often, noticing how you were normally pretending. it seemed like only him noticed your behaviour so he tried to reach you, but being an introvert himself was a challenge.

mikey knew about Souya's interest in you, he started ordering both of you little errands together.

it was super awkward at first because none of you knew what to say

Souya asked for his brother's advice but got nothing good from it.

just like Chifuyu's plan b, he opted for courage.

he tried to approach you little by little, it took him months to get your number but he wanted to know you better

dates would normally occur by accident, you meeting him at a random place and then he inviting you to go for a walk around the city.

after almost a year (10 months to be specific) he asked permission to be your boyfriend. he went to your house with a bouquet of daises, mostly white and the attempt of a smile (he looked very cute ^^)

to others, your relationship was slow, but to Souya it was perfect, he didn't want to push you and respected your limits all the time.

when you told him about your depression he didn't knew what to do, he just gave you the most loving and warm hug he could give, you both cried

he loves you the way you are, he wouldn't change a thing from you

when you doubt yourself he'll reassure you of the amazing being you are and how special you are to him

will recommend you to look for help if you aren't getting it, and would accompany you to your appointments

always checks on you, he doesn't see you as a burden, he just wants to make sure you are safe and okay

whispers sweet nothings to you when you cuddle

likes to hold your pinky when you are in public

will blush hardly when he sees you in an outfit

marathon movie dates, he always gets scared af because of your excentric taste but uses it as an excuse to be near you

asks you to read to him, your voice calms him so much

you'll sleep the best with him, he is a human pillow and his hair is the softest

knows you are not a fan of Nahoya, so whenever you go to his house he asks Nahoya to go out or to stay quiet

you still see him a lot

Nahoya talked to you about your relationship with his twin and asked you to protect him, you also discused some things just to be clear about what you didn't like about him, he obviously stopped because he knows his brother loves you too much.

you are the only one who has seen him smiling, not even Smiley has seen him like that.

is the sweetest smile that exists, gives beautiful vibes, he does it more often for you

his love language might be quality time and acts of service

it doesn't matter where he is as long as you are there he is happy

¡! NSFW ¡!

again, he will never pressure you to do anything

sex isn't very important to him

he's a switch, more on the sub side

loves to fuck you face to face

will eat you out for hours just because he can and he enjoys it

and believe me when I say he can, because he CAN and WILL make you scream in seconds

loves your body so much

loves to bury his face in your breasts, licks them and sucks them up

his tongue is a god tool and will put it to use

the first time he saw your scars he kissed them, wouldn't want you any other way

praises you like if his life depended on it

its all about your pleasure

if you enjoy it, then he does it too

likes to be degraded

super sensitive in his neck and lower back

it turns him on when you are being perverted and try to tease him

loves you riding him, getting the perfect view, squishing your hips and licking your boobs

his dick is very pretty, normal length and girth, pretty pink in the head, a mole near his crotch, trimed

he prefers you to have hair

likes to cry during the act

choke him, trust me, the "demon" comes out

normally passionate sex, but angry sex with him is the best (lol)

sex in the bathroom is the most common

aftercare is amazing

makes you cum like 4 times, just to see his pretty s/o being in heaven by his own actions <3

[daisies: pureness]

hope you liked it love! I know depression sucks but you are not alone, I'll be here whenever you need me bubs 😚💖

¡! song recommendation ¡!

[yourmidnightlover]

the way i loved you

Summary: you regret leaving spencer after everything you've been through.

TW: angst?, fluff, kissing, breakup, mild argument. *let me know if i missed anything*

WC: 2,843

A/N: taylor's version of of that's the way i loved you has stolen my heart and i felt like making a short lil fic about this song. it’s also a second fic in celebration of hitting 700 followers! happy reading!

--------------------------------------------

he was great.

he really was.

he was kind, and smart, and endearing. he was the perfect gentleman. he opened the door for you when you got into and out of his car. he tells you what you need to hear. he's incredible.

tonight when he held your hand as you stepped into his car, he made sure to whisper to you how beautiful you looked in your dress. spencer's favorite dress.

which is why you felt guilty about thinking of spencer.

you were going on a date with him and you couldn't stop thinking about your ex. spencer inhabited your mind when you did nearly everything. it was as if he had never left. the memories of him were always fresh in your mind... even the bad ones.

the arguments. the screaming.

but then there was the passion. the heat that never cooled off between you two. the spark that never dimmed. the light that seemed solar powered, never going out. you wondered if it was still there.

"what were you thinking about getting?" he asked, entirely mesmerized by your presence across the table.

"not sure," you smiled. "maybe just a salad, i'm not very hungry," you shrugged with a smile.

"whatever you'd like," he reached across the table to hold you hand, you obliged.

but there weren't any butterflies from his touch. no electricity that lit up your insides. nothing that made you feel crazy about him as you had with spencer.

it had been 9 months since you ended things with spencer. you were dating for over a year. the two of you had never slowed down since you began. working with him made it that much more intoxicating. a forbidden workplace romance felt dangerous. at first that's why you thought you couldn't get him out of your mind. and then you realized it wasn't that. it was that it was spencer.

this was your fifth date with him. you'd been dating for three months. it had been getting more 'serious' as time went on. but your feelings for him never compared to the rollercoaster of emotions you felt for spencer.

"what're you thinking about, darling?" he asked, stroking his thumb on your hand slowly.

"nothing," you faked yet another smile.

he didn't notice.

he never did.

spencer would've.

you had ended things after getting an offer in the fugitive task force. the pay was better (not that that's why you left), and they needed you more than the team did - even though they told you otherwise. you knew you were valuable, but you also knew that they'd be fine without you - even though they told you otherwise. they told you you'd always have place with the team. so, you left. and along with leaving, spencer had claimed you took his heart with you. but you had left yours with him in return.

you couldn't feel anything for the charming man in front of you whenever spencer still had your heart.

"look, i know it's a bit early to say this," he began speaking, " i mean, we've only been together for three months. but..." you retraced your hand so he fiddled with his own. "i never knew how amazing i could feel with someone in my life romantically. i think... i think i'm in love with you."

*22 months ago*

you had been reckless. you had gone into the house without any backup yet you came out unscathed. spencer was still burning hot despite the fact that you were unharmed. he appeared at your house late the night you had returned, around 2 am.

"y/n!" he pounded on your door. "i know you're in there! open up!" he demanded. you trudged into your living room and opened the door quickly.

"what, spencer?" you spat out. "why are you here? because i know it's not to check up on me," rolling your eyes, you stepped outside with him and shut the door behind you.

"why wouldn't it be? you could've gotten killed, y/n!" he yelled, not at you but at the situation. "maybe i'm worried about you! maybe i care about your well-being! maybe i just don't want you to die!" he shouted.

he had never truly been close to you. ever since you joined 7 months ago he had maybe one conversation with you during each case, only about the case. he wasn't necessarily rude, but mostly deflective. he wouldn't carry the conversation. he replied with simple answers that prevented further conversation. he never wanted to talk with you or hang out with you unless others were there. he just... didn't like you.

but you had been so excited to meet him. penelope, one of the reasons you got the spot on the team in the first place because you'd met her in her hacker days, had talked him up quite a lot. she had also said you were a match made in heaven. you thught she was mistaken until you saw him standing in the bullpen, talking to none other than pg. imagine your disappointment when he barely spoke to you.

and since you had gotten hurt he hadn't just been dismissive. he had been rude. he had rolled his eyes at you when you were sitting across from him in the plane. he had scoffed when morgan said how tough you were for taking the unsub down alone.

and now he was outside your door as rain began pouring down.

"if you do care about me then you have a funny way of showing it," now it was your turn to scoff.

"you were reckless. how could be so foolish?" he asked in a softer tone, walking closer to you to connect his skin to yours, needing to reassure himself that you were alright.

"i wasn't foolish," you snatched your arm away from his grasp, he backed away slowly. "i had to save that little girl's life, reid. you know that i had no other choice."

"you could've gotten killed," he stated once more, holding his hands together in front of him.

"that little girl could've been killed, too," you shook your head, sighing as you pressed your fingers into your temples. "i... reid, i couldn't let that happen."

"well i couldn't... i don't know what i'd do if you had actually been hurt or-or died," he bit his lip, trying to keep himself from saying much more.

"you barely talk to me at all. this is the longest conversation we've had in all the months i've known you," you chuckled humorlessly. "you're ridiculous."

"i'm sorry," he apologized softly, almost whispering. "it's... it's complicated."

"what's complicated?" you stepped forward to get closer to him. "what's so complicated that you couldn't stand to have a real conversation with me?"

"you wouldn't understand," he shook his head, stepping back once more into the rain, turning around as if he were going to leave.

"don't-" you grabbed his bare arm. smoke. "don't walk away. not again," you shook your head. "please tell me why you couldn't stand me?"

"it's not that i couldn't stand you," he said with a sigh, turning around to meet your eyes. "it's that... well i couldn't stand how you made me feel," he admitted, grabbing your hands instead of his own. "i couldn't stand how the first time i saw you i thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world and i couldn't stand how perfect your voice is - even when you're about to cry. i couldn't stand how you're the first woman i've loved since i watched my girlfriend die in front of me."

fire.

you felt fire all over.

maybe it was because the heat you felt as your gears turned, trying to figure out how he could love you. the friction from the thoughts running through your head caused the smoke that lit the flame that burned between the two of you. a match made from heaven, the universe, whatever you believed in, in that moment.

"spencer..." the first time you'd ever called him that, his eyes bore into yours with the same fire you felt. "how could you... how could you love me when you don't even know me?"

"i know you, y/n," he smiled, tears streaming down his face being masked by the rain pouring on the two of you. "i-i know that when you get frustrated or angry you just stay quiet. i know that when you're focused you rub your fingers together. i know that when you're incredibly happy you tear up because you wonder how you deserved to be so joyful. i know that when you're feeling insecure you like to read pride and prejudice and imagine yourself living in another world... and i know that i love you."

"kiss me," you asked, trailing your hands up his arms to the back of his neck. "please... kiss me?" you asked again before he filled your request.

one of his hands grasped the hair at the back of your head, pulling you against him with a groan. you felt the passion penny had said you would've had from the beginning through his kiss. the way his tongue traveled into your mouth and wandered as if he wanted to use his eidetic memory to memorize what you tasted and felt like.

and you knew that the fire you both felt would never burn out because even in the rain, it burned brighter than ever before.

"spencer," you broke the kiss. "i love you."

*now*

"so," he had smiled. "you don't have to say it back, i completely understand if you need more time."

you felt terrible. you missed spencer. you wanted spencer. you needed spencer. not more time. you had already given him time. you gave yourself time. but no amount of time could ever diminish what you felt for spencer.

"i'm sorry," you whispered, preparing to break things off softly. "you're such an amazing guy, a total gentleman. but... but i still-"

"love the other guy," he chuckled, looking down a bit upset. "that's alright. you can't force feelings."

"i really tried," you smiled, reaching for his hand once again. "with him it was just so... passionate, and crazy, and... i'm so sorry. i wasn't trying to lead you on i just figured that over time those feelings for hi would just disappear but... they never did."

"i know, thank you for trying to feel things out with me," he smiled, knowing you could see how forced it was. "if you wouldn't mind, could we still be friends?"

"oh, of course," you squeezed his hand. "you're one of the kindest men i've ever met," you chuckled. "thank you for being so understanding, luke."

"oh, it's no problem," he shrugged off the compliment.

you finished dinner with him and he dropped you off at your apartment. you ran to your room and decided to call someone.

"hello?" the voice rang over the phone into your ear.

"hey," you sighed happily. "can i ask you for a favor?"

next thing you knew you were packing up your apartment that never felt like home. you got onto a plane and moved back home, right back into the same place. the same night you got there, you knew you had to make a stop at a certain someone's house.

you ran up the stairs of the apartment complex, up to the apartment you found to be your second home. you banged on the familiar door rapidly, anticipating his answer. when he did answer, you were already teary-eyed.

"hi," you sniffled.

"y/n?" spencer questioned. "what are you...? you moved away why are you...?"

"i missed you," you wiped the tears that were flowing down your face, pointlessly so as they continued flowing.

"you left me, y/n," he felt the water in his eyes welling up to mirror your own, stepping aside to let you inside and shutting the door behind you. "you left. not me."

"i know, spencer. i know," you sighed. "but we were- we were toxic. and we argued all the time and we screamed at each other a lot."

"so why are you here?" he spat out.

"because i miss it. i miss the screaming and fighting. i miss kissing you in the rain. i miss cursing your name at 2 am because you would beat me at chess," you cried a laugh. "i miss the way you made me feel. i miss your touch and the way-" you tried to choke back a sob. "i miss the way you held me when i'm sad and the way- the way you loved me. because that's the way i loved you."

"y/n it's been 9 months," he huffed. "why would you... i don't know how to trust you again."

"please, spencer. i'm so sorry. i'll make it up to you," you reached for his arm, rubbing your hands up and down them to ground yourself. "i'll do anything, please. i-i'll buy you a new bookshelf. i'll do your files for eight months. i'll-i'll... tell me what to do, please. i want to make it up to you if you'd let me."

"y/n..." he trailed off. "i don't know. why're you even here? you accepted a job with the fugitive task force."

"i came back to the bau," you shrugged.

"was that for me?" he asked as if you'd never do such a thing.

"i mean... partially, yea," you chuckled humorlessly, an awkward silence enveloping the room.

"you shouldn't have," he looked down at his hands.

"oh," you analyzed his body language, dropping your hands from his skin. he missed the touch already.

his arms and hands were limp, detached. his eyes held emotion, hurt, tears. his shoulders were slouched and made to look slim, small.

"i'm sorry," you bit your lip. "i-i'll just..." you motioned towards the door as you maneuvered around his body to open it yourself.

you got it halfway open before he shoved your back against it, pressing your lips against his fervently. his hands flew to your waist and pulled you closer to him, his chest still pushing against yours. it was as if he had never let that flame die down either. maybe you were on his mind 24/7 as he was yours. maybe he couldn't stop loving you either, even though he hasn't said it yet. the taste of tears on both of your tongues reminded you of the situation at hand.

"i do, too," he whispered against your lips. "love you," he read your mind. "as if i'd ever be able to stop," he sarcastically admitted. "but... how would this work? you said it yourself, we fought and argued all the time."

"we could work on communication. i've worked on bettering myself while i was away. i even did yoga," you brought your hands up to his face, pressing another peck on his lips.

"i missed you too," another kiss. "and i've tried to improve myself. i guess i just wondered why you had left so abruptly. why i never really got much of an explanation."

"and you deserved one, spencer," you ran your thumbs along his cheekbones. "you deserve the best and that's why i left. because i knew i would never really be best for you. i knew that if i had come to you and told you how i had been feeling that you'd talk me down and then i'd stay. and i know it's selfish of me to be with you right now but i couldn't stay away from you any longer. i tried to forget about you but i couldn't."

"i'm glad you couldn't forget me," he smiled against your lips as you pushed him forward onto his couch, you straddled his hips as he sat down.

"i could never," you kissed his forehead. "no matter who i met," his nose. "i couldn't get you out of my head," his cheek. "you've driven me insane," his other cheek. "because that's the way i loved you," his lips.

"i love you," he mumbled against your lips, his hands finding your waist and gripping it tightly as if he never wanted to let go. "so much."

in the words of the beloved mr. darcy, he has bewitched you body and soul and you love, love, love him. he made you completely and perfectly and incandescently happy. you were consumed by fire because of how much you loved him. you loved him in a way that possessed your soul completely, utterly blissed at the thought of him. in a way that lit your very essence to flames and transformed it - not into a phoenix rising from the ashes - but transformed it into pure, unadulterated adoration and desire.

and that's the way he loved you.

taglist:

@averyhotchner

@greenprisca

@muffin-cup

@s1utformgg

if you’d like to be added to the taglist, please don’t hesitate to message me or leave a comment!

[butteerfly]

— Dating haikyuu!! boys ♡

headcanons 🦋

this was really difficult because in haikyuu all the boys are characters that you can't help but love, at least it's like that for me. So choosing a few was quite a challenge, anyway if you want a specific character that I didn't mention let me know ♡♡♡

kageyama tobio; tsukishima kei; nishinoya yuu; kozume kenma; ushijima wakatoshi (my boys) — fem!!reader

KAGEYAMA TOBIO

(I'm so in love with this pretty boy)

he is very sweet with you

The best part is that he doesn't realize this

Contrary to common thought, I think tobio is an excellent boyfriend

He always makes sure you get home safely after school, even ask the coach for a few minutes to say goodbye to you (I'm just crying as I imagine this)

You can't spend a lot of time together after school because he has his practices, but he always makes sure you sit next to him in class and have lunch with him.

always has your favorite strawberry milk in his backpack, just for you

He doesn't want you to go to practice because he's secretly a little jealous and he knows that as soon as they see you, Noya and Hinata are going to jUMp at you

The kind of boyfriend your parents love and yet he still gets nervous when he's with them

definitely bad for cuddles

He doesn't know how to hug or kiss you, he doesn't know if that's going to be okay for you or if you're uncomfortable, he never had a girlfriend before you

You always tell him what to do but it doesn't matter, he always blushes after all

forehead kisses are his favorites

He loves when his head rests on your lap and you play with his hair, he instantly relaxes

When you go to see him at one of the matches, his smile and blush never fade.

He loves to see the sparkle in your eyes when he sets the ball for the spiker

and when is he going to serve...

he knows that you know that's a direct point

You raise his ego a lot, it is inevitable 😔💕

You simply give him unshakable strength when he is more demoralized than normal.

always hugs you after a match, it doesn't matter if he lost or won, the others don't matter, only you in his arms

TSUKISHIMA KEI

dating him is amazingly fun

You are the couple that always teases each other in some way and is not bothered by this

Since you know each other you never stop laughing together and this is something he is aware of, he appreciates you very much despite not showing it so often

ok but no matter what your height is, he always teases you

The fact that your hands don't even cross behind his neck makes him laugh a lot

he's actually good for cuddles

He's the type of boy who always has a smirk on his face before kissing you

hands on your waist every time he hugs you

when i said he was good for cuddles i meant cuddles in the privacy of his room

because if you hug him or kiss him in front of the team or his family he BLUSHES

spoiler alert!!: you do it on purpose

if you wear his hoddies with dinosaurs he will die

He made a playlist with songs that remind him of you and songs that are important to both of you, but he named it "ant" because according to him, you are similar to them, small and insignificant 💀

he's good at killing romance

Despite that, he is the person who listens to you the most and pays attention to details.

When he sees you cheering for the team with one of his shirts he can't help but be a bit surprised, even though he doesn't want to accept it, you know that volleyball is important to your boyfriend

At first he is a bit distracted, but after thinking more clearly his blocks become the strongest iron wall

his favorite moment with you is in the afternoons when you both return home from school with the sunset in the distance and he holds your hand tight

You give him the peace of mind that he sometimes needs when his thoughts don't leave him alone.

NISHINOYA YUU

please let's talk about this man

he can't believe you love him

you are too perfect

you are his pretty girl

HIS pretty girl

whenever he thinks about it he CRIES

he takes you to practices and matches just so everyone knows he has a girlfriend, a very beautiful one

whatever you do (art, writing, sport, acting, singing, etc) he is very proud of you

dating Nishinoya is actually an adventure

he is a very effusive person and never stays in his comfort zone

he will try to do whatever he likes and catches his attention, nobody can stop him

This also applies to you

your dates are weird

he invited you to his house just to cook and taste sour food -u both almost set the house on fire-

he took you to TOKYO just to go to Alice in Wonderland's cafe

You still remember the day you asked him for your notebook and he handed you his backpack, but when you opened it, many bags full of gummies came out everywhere

you don't know what to expect from this boy and that's why you love him

he is a very loving person by nature

his hands will always be on your waist, always wants to feel you close

the warmth in his chest that you make him feel no one else does

he loves when you kiss him surprisingly, he will follow the kiss immediately

even when all he wants to do is rest, he lets you sleep on top of him

when you call him super libero he really feels like one, even if he is very tired

you are one of the biggest pillars of his motivation and the best person he could meet ♡

KOZUME KENMA

Before dating, he was very shy with you and could never talk to you if Kuro was not with you

not because he didn't want to, the words got a lot on his tongue and he didn't know what to do in front of you

kuro clearly helped this boy

you had to confess first but that doesn't really matter because from that day on you are both very happy

You don't know how to explain it, but you both have a strange telepathy, you always know what the other is thinking or going to say.

You can't lie to him, he always ends up finding out

your dates are in the arcades and buying a lot of rare KitKat to test them with Kuro

and you only have dates when you make sure you have all your homework done because sometimes you forget about school 💀

you always try new dyes in your hair and he always helps you

he knows that you don't do it to like him

however he likes you a lot no matter what you do

you are the only person with whom he seeks physical contact very often

He doesn't know why but kissing you always feels very good for him

when he kisses you, his whole body relaxes

kisses you whenever he can

love to see the blush on your face

you love when your boyfriend talks to you about a new game, he looks so excited it makes your heart melt

If you are not very good at playing a video game he will help you without hesitation

you can never beat him, after all he taught you

you guys always end up playing until 8 in the morning on weekends, please get some sleep 💀

He loves when you sit on his lap and he can cross his arms around your waist, he would stay there all day because there is no more calm and peace than that moment

USHIJIMA WAKATOSHI

he is a big teddy bear

whenever he can and has time, he listens to you carefully

Every time he doesn't understand something you say to him, he will ask Tendo with genuine confusion in his voice.

You are one of the few people that he really pays attention to and cares

he is not good at interpreting the feelings of others and the way he does not understand everyday things between your friends makes you laugh

he is a big baby

you are his wallpaper

Whenever he hugs you from behind, he leans his chin on your head, he saw it in other couples and he found it cute

He loves to see you with his shirts because they fit you better than him

He is struck by the way you dress, he says it is very striking and cute

The kind of boyfriend who would take you out to eat at restaurants

always makes sure you eat really well and exercise because he says the body needs it, even if he is away

The best thing about dating him is that he does not feel embarrased if you kiss or hug him in front of someone, he does not care what others think at all

He feels embarrased of the fact that he always thinks about kissing you, and that never happened to him with anyone

He does not think about it too much either, if he wants to kiss you, you want to and you are at the right time, he will simply do it

No matter what your personality is, he is attracted to you, he always says things that he never thought he would say to someone who is not Tendo

The truth is that you are as important to him as volleyball, and when you go to see him at matches without notifying him, he just freezes for a second.

Your stuning smile and the euphoria on your face makes his whole body go beyond his capabilities, he feels unstoppable when you are there smiling for him

He does not understand much even about his own feelings, but the hours after the game, when you are next to his tired body, lightly caressing his face, make him feel very happy.

🦋🦋🦋

well ... I didn't like this headcanon so much, but I didn't hate it either, I hope you like it more than I do ;)

[julyarchives]

In The Dark

→ Pairing: Yuto x Reader

→ Genre: fluff.

→ Words:  1.8K

→ Contains: friends to lovers; confession; pinning; song lyrics

→ A/N: This is a very soft story and we absolutely loved to write it! Hope you guys like it as well!!! Special thank you to the person who requested it <3

Laying on your bed you checked your phone for the ninth time in five minutes, it was still past 1 a.m. and Yuto still didn't write back. Sighing, you opened a game on your phone and tried to distract yourself. Of course, it only worked for a few seconds before your mind drifted back to your best friend.

You and Yuto were best friends since you met at school and the bond you shared was something else, always together and sharing everything. Everything was perfect until you noticed your stomach turning in nervousness whenever you saw him laugh at something you said when you'd find excuses to touch him and would almost squeak when he took it as an invitation to hug or cuddle on your couch.

When you finally accepted you fell for your best friend, it was scary. Obviously, Yuto could never find out, you were sure it would break a beautiful friendship and it was better to have him around as a friend than not at all. So you tried to move on. You went on dates with a few guys but of course, it never worked out perfectly. They all had a main flaw, they were not Yuto. They couldn't make you smile like him, didn't understand you like him.

As you went on dates to forget Yuto, he also went out on dates, even if they were fewer than yours. But it hurt you to know that he was just following his life, his dates were for real and not just a means to an end like yours. Tonight was his third date with this cute girl from his music course. She was a good match for him, you couldn't deny that.

That's why you couldn't stop checking your phone, as Yuto said he'd text you after he got home to tell you all about it. It'd make you hurt more but he needed your support and you couldn't deny him anything. Sighing for the millionth time, you put your phone down for a few seconds to close your eyes briefly before opening your music app and choosing a very specific song to let out your feelings.

In THE DaRk by Bobby resonated in your bedroom, your speaker doing its job perfectly. You clicked on the repeat button in the app and put down your phone. Closing your eyes, the lyrics brokenly fell from your lips as you whispered it like a prayer, the only way to let your feelings out. Even knowing you had other friends to talk to, speaking about your feelings made it even more real, meaning it'd hurt more, so you chose to keep it a secret from everyone.

The song was halfway through its second repeat when the notification sound chimed into the song. You moved a bit too fast for your liking but oh well. Of course, it was Yuto checking in, saying the date went well but he wasn't home yet. You felt sad knowing he was probably with her still and turned the sound louder getting up to move to the beat.

You focused on the lyrics, blasting out the words you wished you could tell your best friend in the same moment he was with someone else. Your body swayed as you sang all about staying up at night with him in your mind, needing him to know you loved him, wishing there was a portal between your rooms so you could be together this very moment. Your phone made a ding sound once more and you picked it up from the bed, expecting it to be Yuto once again after you told him to tell you when he got home.

🎶Are you thinking of me at this dawn?

I wish therе was a continuous portal from my room to yours🎶

You stared at it for a few seconds, alarmed and confused that he sent you the same lyrics you just sang. The phone showed he was typing and you waited, getting more and more confused.

Nice song, Y/N. But don't you think it's a bit loud for this hour?

Not knowing how to answer, you just sent a few question marks and stared at the phone. How could he know all this if he was out with the girl?

Turn around

You moved a bit too fast and you almost tripped on your feet as you saw Yuto leaning against the doorframe, a cute smile on his lips. You quickly paused the song on your phone and he chuckled at your puzzled face.

"Giving me a spare key wasn't a good choice, was it?", his deep voice sounded almost as loud as the music was a few seconds before.

"What are you doing here?", you were glued to the floor. You weren't ready to hear him speak about this date with that pretty smile and shining eyes.

"I told you the date was fine but I didn't go home… thought you'd figure I'd come see you but suddenly there was a very loud Bobby music in the house", Yuto smiled widely, stepping into the room and closing the door behind him.

"I… I thought you were still with her", your voice faltered. You were too tired, too sad about his date and truly was expecting to cry yourself to sleep when he got home while listening to the same song that was on minutes ago.

"She wasn't my best friend", he said, hands in his pocket, standing in the middle of your room. "I wanted to come to see you".

"Why?", your voice was barely a whisper. You tried to recall if you said anything out loud while in your room, now scared you said something that could compromise your feelings for him.

"Can we…?", Yuto said, pointing at your bed briefly.

You nodded, moving the covers so you could lay down and still make room for him. He moved alongside you, laying down and naturally you both moved until you laid your head on his chest, him turning slightly sideways to hug you fully, his chin resting on top of your head.

"Can you play the song again?", he asked gently. You picked up your phone, staring at your wallpaper for a second. It was a silly picture you took with Yuto and he insisted you chose it as wallpaper. "Mine is just like yours", he said after noticing you staring at the picture, "you can imagine my date wasn't very fond of it", he chuckled.

You made sure to lower the volume of the song before playing it, Bobby's voice now as a background whisper. You felt your heart tightening at the mention of Yuto's date, imagining he'd be changing his wallpaper any time now. His voice suddenly filled the room, singing along the song.

"Shine, you shine on my existence

My night keeps getting longer

At night when everyone is asleep, I think of you

At this dawn, at this dawn

Shine, you shine on my existence

Tears are erased by my emotions

Add, add color to the world"

You joined in, even if you felt like his voice was heaven and yours wasn't a match. Yuto held you tighter when you began singing, thumbs now caressing your shoulders. You stayed that way for most of the song, only moving when he moved his head and hand, gently holding your chin to make you look up to him. He smiled and gently sang while looking into your eyes. On instinct you follow, head almost spinning but too entranced on him to move.

Even if I've confessed a hundred times inside my brain

I'm invisible to you

I could do better than anybody, anything for you

If I want you to feel the same way

That must be greedy, that'd probably be a chance to peek into heaven

'Cause you are angel

Your breath caught in your throat when Yuto moved, placing his forehead against yours. Your heart was beating fast and you were sure you were dreaming, your hands finding his shirt and holding it, almost as an anchor to reality. A lot of questions were clouding your mind but you couldn't speak, scared of breaking whatever this was.

"I ditched her", Yuto whispered, "I knew something was off since the first date but I gave her a chance". You closed your eyes, too scared to look at him. "She had everything I thought I wanted, everyone said so too".

"I know", you said a bit too fast. Maybe if you answered, he'd stop talking about her while being so close to you.

"But she still missed the most important trait I've been looking for without even knowing", his hand moved, touching the side of your face so you could look at him. "She wasn't you".

You opened your eyes in shock, breathing faster without even taking notice. By now you were sure even Yuto could hear your heart beating against your chest. Your mind acted before you could even process, desperate to not let the moment go away.

"You have no idea how much it pained me to see you go on dates that weren't me. How much I listened to this very song wishing I'd tell you how much I fall for you whenever you smile", once you finished speaking, you heaved, almost felt like you ran a marathon.

"Funny. I was about to say the same to you", Yuto chuckled. His forehead was still against yours and his breath tickled your nose. You were staring into his eyes, both of you smiling shyly. "I'm going to kiss you now, ok?", he said. Your smile grew wider, his warning making you shiver in anticipation.

Yuto moved slowly, giving you plenty of time to pull back. You met him halfway, lips connecting gently. You heard him sigh and your stomach flipped, you were as happy as you were nervous. His thumb moved in circles on your face, caressing it. Your lips moved against his after a few seconds, a chaste kiss, so gently but you felt years of pinning pouring into it and hoped he felt it.

When you parted, you couldn't contain a smile, and when you opened your eyes, Yuto had the same face, smiling at you in the sweetest way. He gave you a quick peck and settled on the bed more comfortably and you followed, holding him close. It was late and you could feel how tired you were.

"We'll talk when we wake up, is that alright?", his voice sounded as sleepy as you did.

"Of course. But I have one demand", you said, lazily supporting yourself on his chest to look at his face better. He hummed in answer, fingers playing with your hair. "That song has got to be our song now". Yuto chuckled loudly and you smiled at the sound, still feeling like you were dreaming.

"Of course, princess", he kissed you briefly again before settling back on the bed, "I wouldn't have it any other way". And with that you drifted to sleep, dreaming about a future that was sure to be near with your best friend and love, that now you knew loved you back.

[robincantfunction]

requested: yes/no (requests are open) word count:858 (sorry some of these are a lot shorter than i'd like) warnings: fem!reader, insecurities, swearing, sex references at the end, fluff summary: y/n has always felt insecure, and on the night of the yule ball it hits her like a wave coming to crash down everything in sight song prompt 1: porcelain by mxmtoon

she couldn't stop crying, she just felt like every part of her was broken, damaged, bruised. and in a sense she wasn't wrong, but we're all a bit battered. it's what makes us - well - us. but right now, to her, it didn't seem like it. no, to her the whole world was caving in on her, she was suffocating in silence, drowning in unspoken compliments she really could have used right about now. she was a boat capsizing and needed an anchor. her anchor. fred. "love, are you ok? you're scaring me" she could hear his voice faintly, like it was scrambling up from an abyss to be heard by her. her. his love. y/n l/n. misunderstood was the only word that perfectly described his girlfriend, most people at hogwarts couldn't see what he did. to him, she wasn't broken china, scattered by a bull - or in her case anxiety, depression, insecurities, pain - she was porcelain, her skin was a story. her spots were stars. constilations that would always make her seem somehow even more beautiful.

once she snapped out of her daze enough to hear him, she opened the door to the bathroom, collapsing in his arms, like he was what was keeping her alive - and in some way he was. he calmed her down, her breathing that was once jagged was now matching his, her heartbeat that was like thunder before was now matching his, her tears that were previously scattering down her face and onto whatever surface they could reach were now being soaked into his dress robes. the yule ball was a big scene, one y/n wasn't quite prepared for. it was beautiful, and the night was going lovely, but after seeing nearly every body being complimented by their dance partner for the way they looked she couldn't take it. it wasn't a secret that she wasn't comfortable in her skin, certainly not to fred. he couldn't understand how someone as beautiful, someone as kind, someone as so incredibly amazing as y/n couldn't see what he could. he couldn't understand how nobody but him could see it.

before the ball properly started, it was nice. for once she felt comfortable.

she walked down the stairs, a little self conscious at first, she saw the look on fred's face and just stopped caring. this. this was what mattered, fred weasley was what mattered. and if he was stupid enough to fall for her for some unknown reason, she wasn't one to complain. but as the night prolonged she kept hearing comments, some directly insulting her, others wondering why the fred weasley would love 'a lost cause'. after it all got to much she ran off to the bathroom, and fred could tell something was seriously wrong.

"do you wanna talk about it?" she sighed. "i'm wearing you down." she sniffed, and his face showed nothing but confusion "someone like you shouldn't be burdened with someone like me" he shook his head, helped her up of the floor and led her somewhere, at first she was confused, but when they arrived in his dorm she realised he wanted a quiet place to talk - and with everyone at the ball and scattered about the castle - this was the best place. "y/n, love, you aren't some burden i carry around you know. you're my girlfriend and i love you. every part of you is perfect, and i'm not just saying it. every imperfect thing about you is what makes you so incredibly perfect. you're human, you have flaws sure. but you are also the most beautiful girl in my eyes ok. let people think what they want, because i'm telling you right now that you are my favourite person in this whole fucking world ok." she smiled, but he could still see that look on her face that said 'i don't know if i should believe you or not'. he gace her a hug, a big hug. he didn't know if he wanted to let go, and she was ok with that. "i love you too. you know that right?" he smiled. she was truly perfect. "yes my love. do you wanna go back? or do you wanna cuddle?" she opted for the cuddling option. of course.

she changed into one of him tops and a pair of shorts she left in here not that long ago. the two were very peaceful, talking about nothing and everything at the same time. then they heard a knock on the door "i know you two went up here awhile ago but i just want to check- you are decent right?" george. they both burst out laughing, he took it as a sign they were in fact decent "you're a bloody git you know that" fred chuckled "is it bad i kinda wish we were doing it so we could scar him for life?" the two of them continued to laugh "no y/n. if i walked in on that i wouldn't be able to look either of you in the eye again." it was a bit rocky, but this night wasn't actually all that bad.

[mydogisveryadorbs]

blue ain't your color | jj maybank

masterlist

summary: song fic based on blue ain’t your color by keith urban.

warnings: mentions of mentally and physically abusive relationships, underage drinking, mentions of drugs, angst, fluff, v soft jj

PSA: this is not in any way meant to idealize or romanticize abusive relationships. if you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship please get help. below are some resources and learning tools. 

National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1 (800) 799 – 7233

Love is Respect – National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline: 1 (866) 331 – 9474

more hot lines and info: https://victimconnect.org/resources/national-hotlines/

learn more: https://www.thehotline.org/psa/

lyrics in bold

3.8k+ words

✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰

I can see you over there

Starring at your drink

Watchin' that ice sink

All alone tonight

You look down at your drink, moving the straw in a circular motion causing the ice to swirl around creating a small tornado.

Glancing at the time on your phone, you realize you've been waiting here for almost two hours. 

Your boyfriend was supposed to meet you at Topper’s party at 9. In the first thirty minutes, you weren't surprised. Liam, your kook boyfriend of 10 months, was late for almost everything, so this didn't come as a shock to you. 

When the one hour mark hit you were honestly quite worried. What if he was in an accident? What if he got jumped? Maybe your thoughts were most likely irrational, but you couldn't help but worry about your boyfriend.

One hour later, you had gotten past the worrying stage. Now you were simply angry, no, furious at him. Had he stood you up? Did he forget about you? These thoughts were definitely more rational. It wouldn't be the first time Liam stood you up, but you would make sure it was the last. 

At the beginning of your relationship, everything had been sunshine and butterflies. About two months in, however, he asked you to stop seeing your friends.

You see you were a born and raised pogue. Your dad was a close friend of Big John so you had practically grown up with John B, JJ, and Pope, in more recent years becoming close friends with Kiara.

At first, it was little things. Liam would get upset if you left to hang out with the pogues instead of him. Then one day, he asked you to stop seeing them all together. You, of course, retaliated, telling him that you would never leave your friends. But Liam had a way with words, and not a good way. He told you for months that your friends would never love you and that you were lucky that he had even taken pity on you. Slowly, you started to believe him. You stopped seeing the pogues, pushing everyone who truly loved you out of your life.

Liam became more and more distant as the months went on. He would leave you almost every night to drink and party, not even bothering to let you know where he was headed. The two of you had been fighting nonstop for several weeks. It had gotten physical only a few times and the next morning he would apologize profusely, so you stayed.

Seeing him walk in with two girls wrapped around his waist, nearly two and a half hours late, was the last straw for you.

Grabbing your purse, you walked up to Liam, who's eyes widened with the realization the moment he saw you.

“Fuck, (Y/N),” he says, slightly slurring his words as his arms still holding the two skinny blondes at his sides, “It's not what it looks like.” You can see his red-rimmed eyes and dilated pupils, telling you that he was coked out. 

You roll your eyes, knowing that this was it for you. “Really, Liam,” you snap back, “‘Cause it looks like we are done here.”

Liam’s eyes widen in shock, never having seen you lash out like this before. He shakes it off and his expression quickly contorts into one of disgust. “Okay,” he says with a shrug, “Good luck finding someone else to take pity on a whore like you, dirty pogue.” He walks away with the two girls, leaving you in shock.

It takes a moment for you to realize that you had just ended this almost one-year relationship. 

The first emotion you feel is one of freedom and relief. No more would you have to be held down by this weight of not being able to do and say what you want.

That feeling slowly dissipates as the feeling of dread starts to overcome it. You had pushed away all of your friends for this boy who had let you go like you were nothing to him. Maybe you were nothing.

You walk back to the bar area, grabbing another drink, feeling the need to drown away your sorrows.

And chances are

You're sittin' here in this bar

'Cause he ain't gonna treat you right

JJ Maybank hated kook parties with a passion.

Thankfully he hadn't had the opportunity to attend too many of them in his lifetime. But now that John B was macking on Sarah Cameron, it wasn't uncommon for the blonde boy to get dragged along to one of these events.

John B had left JJ to fend for himself as soon as they had arrived at the party, slipping off somewhere to find Sarah. JJ looked around the extravagant home that belonged to one of his enemies, Topper Thornton. His ring clad fingers fiddled with an expensive-looking vase, trying to find the perfect moment to snag it and slip away.

JJ’s eyes filtered through the crowd when they landed on something, or rather someone, that he had least expected to see.

His hand slipped from the vase, letting his gaze drink you in. You definitely looked different. Your once long hair was now cut just below your shoulders and your typical style of denim shorts and a cropped shirt was exchanged for a lavish-looking dress and sparkly stilettos.

JJ admits that he probably wouldn't have recognized you if he hadn't spent so many years unable to take his eyes off of you whenever the pogues were together.

The boy had loved his life long best friend since the day she clocked a boy in the face for making fun of JJ’s worn-out clothes. They were seven. In addition to being the day JJ had met (Y/N) and John B, it was also the day he fell in love with the (Y/E/C) eyed girl.

When you started dating your kook boyfriend at the beginning of your junior year, JJ was initially devastated. He soon brought himself to realize, however, that a lowlife like him would never be able to deserve someone as beautiful and kind-hearted as you. His thoughts were confirmed when you abruptly stopped hanging around the pogues and him. You were too good for him. The blonde boy had no idea of the pain that Liam had caused you in the past ten months.

Now looking at you, JJ could see that you were upset. He had gotten really good at analyzing your body language over the many years of being your best friend.

All thoughts of stealing the vase flew out of his mind as his feet started in your direction.

Well, it's probably not my place

But I'm gonna say it anyway

'Cause you look like

You haven't felt the fire

Had a little fun

Hadn't had a smile in a little while

You felt a figure move to sit in the bar stool chair next to you, but you choose to ignore whoever it is, not particularly feeling up to socializing with a contemptuous kook after what you just went through.

The figure didn't move after a few minutes so you turn to look at them with a glare in your eyes, ready to snap at them and ask them to leave you alone. Your gaze immediately softens as you realize the person next to you is in fact the last person you would ever expect to see at a party like this, JJ Maybank.

Tears begin to prick at your eyes as you continue to stare at the side profile of the blonde boy who hasn't yet turned to face you. 

Everything you had done so well to hide over the last ten years of knowing and loving him comes rushing back. Your love for the boy next to you consumes every fiber of your being. 

A lone tear falls down your cheek as you begin to curse yourself and Liam. How did I let him control me into giving this up? This feeling?

Blue looks good on the sky

Looks good on that neon buzzin' on the wall

But darling, it don't match your eyes

JJ finally turns his head to look at you and feels his entire resolve crumble. You were crying. The sight nearly breaks his heart in two.

His eyes lock with yours and he can see the pain and heartache swirling within them.

“What did he do to you,” JJ mutters, letting his eyes roam the crowd for the boy he despises most in the world. Almost a year of suppressed anger starts to bubble up to the surface.

“JJ,” you whimper.

The sadness and hopelessness in your voice makes every ounce of anger in him evaporate as he turns his head to look at you again. The look in your eyes tells him that the kook boy had hurt you worse than he ever knew.

JJ wants nothing more than to pull you into his arms and never let anything else in the world harm you. His hands itch to wipe the tears off your face and pull your head to his chest.

However, JJ also wants you to be as comfortable as possible and he's not sure if you're ready for the amount of love he has to give you just yet.

You surprise the blonde boy by reaching out to your arms out to him. The blonde wastes no time in standing up and pulling your body flush to his chest.

Everyone else in the world disappears as the two of you clutch each other with all you have. Both of you realize how much you had missed the comfort of each other's embrace. 

You're not sure how long you stand there like that, face nuzzled into JJ’s shoulder as the boy strokes your hair comfortingly.

“I'm sorry,” you mumble into his shirt, not willing to pull away from the warmth he radiates.

JJ’s eyebrows draw together in confusion as he pulls away enough to look down at you. “What do you mean,” he asks with a softness in his voice that is reserved for you only, gently lifting your chin so that you are looking into his beautiful cerulean eyes.

You sniffle. “I'm sorry for leaving you. I'm sorry for breaking down in front of you. I'm sorry for dragging you into this mess. But most of all, I'm sorry for ever believing that I could live without you. I-I mean if it weren't for you I don't know what I would do. I understand if you don't want to talk to-” your ramble is suddenly cut off by JJ pressing his lips to yours.

The boy knows that this is probably not the best time to confess his feelings towards you, but he can't watch you talk down about yourself like that anymore. Do you not know how much he adores you? 

The kiss is soft and passionate. JJ can taste your salty tears on his slightly chapped lips as they work against yours. Both of you poor every ounce of emotion you have into the kiss. 

JJ reluctantly pulls away when the two of you run out of air, placing his forehead delicately on yours as your arms wrap around his neck.

I'm tellin' you

You don't need that guy

It's so black and white

He's stealin' your thunder

Baby, blue ain't your color

Both of you pant as you look into each other's eyes. “I've wanted to do that for so long,” JJ says, as the smile you cherish so much graces his features.

“Really?” you ask and JJ can hear the vulnerability in your voice. What did that shithead do to you to make you so insecure?

“You have no idea, baby,” he says, tenderly kissing away the tear that has slipped out of your eye and onto your cheek.

Not having the words to express how you feel about the boy in front of you, you pull his head back down, kissing him so sweetly that it makes his knees buckle.

“JJ,” you whisper as you pull away, but you never get to finish your statement because you are suddenly ripped out of his embrace.

“You fucking whore,” Liam seethes at you taking a stride towards you and you instinctively take a step back. “You break up with me and two minutes later you've moved onto another guy. Slut.” His words cut you deep and you know by the tone of his voice that a punch to the gut or a slap to the face is coming. Liam raises his hand and you brace yourself for impact, but it never comes.

The sound of yelling fills your senses and you open your eyes to see JJ punching Liam in the face repeatedly. You are frozen as you watch the scene in front of you.

“JJ,” you hear John B yell, turning to look at him, “You're gonna kill him.”

Your eyes widen in realization at his words and you take a step forward.

“JJ,” you call, but your voice is drowned out by the sound of everyone yelling around you. You clear your throat and try again, louder. “JJ.”

This time JJ stops mid punch, turning to look at you. Fear fills your body when you see that his wide, normally baby blue eyes are nearly black.

His gaze softens as he takes in your anxious look.

JJ steps away from the beat-up boy and you see a few of his friends pull Liam’s limp body away. You lock your eyes back to JJ’s and he takes a careful step towards you causing you to involuntarily flinch back slightly.

I'm not tryna

Be another just

Pick you up

Kinda guy

Tryna drink you up

Tryna take you home

He wants to cry out at the sight. Don't you know that he would rather die than ever hurt you? 

You do know this, and you're not afraid of the boy in the slightest, but the last five minutes have put you on edge.

Seeing the broken look in the blonde’s eyes, you take quick steps toward his body, wrapping him in your embrace. He melts into your arms, allowing his face to nuzzle into the crook of your neck.

The crowd that had formed around the fight disperses, realizing the show is over.

“(Y/N).” The sound of your name being called pulls your attention away from the sweet boy in your arms.

You pull away from JJ slightly, still keeping an arm around his bicep.

Looking over, you see John B standing to the side with Sarah Cameron. You had heard about the two of them getting together and you suddenly realize why JJ happened to be at this party.

The sadness in John B’s eyes as he looks at you breaks your heart. The two of you have been like sister and brother your whole lives and, besides JJ, he was the hardest for you to stop talking to.

You feel JJ’s grip on you loosen, urging you to go to John. The two of you walk towards each other and John B pulls you into his arms. 

“I missed you, (Y/N/N),” he says unto your hair, “So much.”

You smile, tears softly rolling down your cheeks. “I missed you too, JB,” you say, pulling away to look at JJ who looks back with a sad smile on his face.

But I just don't understand

How another man

Can take your sun

And turn it ice cold

The four of you decided it was best to leave. John B dropped Sarah off at her house and drove the three of you back to the Chateau. Your stomach drops at the sight of the small shack.

JJ notices your facial expression, placing his hand softly on top of yours. “You okay?” he asks gently as John B parks the van.

You nod with a small smile and JJ helps you out of the van, holding your hand as he leads you to the porch. You stop walking, causing the two boys to turn around and look at you.

“I'm sorry,” you say, tears pooling in your eyes again. JJ gives you a knowing look. “(Y/N),” he says, almost sternly.

“No,” you say, wiping your eyes, “Let me talk.” JJ nods and John B looks at you expectantly. “I left you. Both of you. I- Liam, he just made me feel so useless and I didn't want to be a bother to you guys anymore.”

JJ lets out a sound, almost like a growl, and pulls you into a hug. “You are not useless, (Y/N),” he says seriously, “You are so important, to both of us, and we missed you so much.”

You nod into his chest as John B comes to wrap his arms around both of you.

The three of you group hug and you sigh contently, happy to be back with your boys.

Well, I've had enough to drink

And it's makin'

Me think that I just might

Tell you if I were a painter I wouldn't change ya

I'd just paint you bright

John B helps JJ set up the pull out while you change into a pair of John B’s sweats and JJ’s t-shirt. John B says goodnight and goes to “hit the hay” as he puts it, leaving you and JJ alone again.

“I'll sleep on the other couch and you can take the bed,” he says sweetly, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of your head.

The two of you settle into your “beds”, but you can't seem to fall asleep with so many thoughts running through your mind.

Everything that has happened since you left the pogues seems like one big sad blur. Your mind wanders to JJ. What does this mean for you two? 

“(Y/N),” the voice you love so much calls. You hum in response. “You ‘wake?” he asks. You sit up in the pullout shaking your head.

“Can't sleep,” you say, rubbing your eyes. 

JJ sits up as well. “M’sorry, baby,” the nickname makes your heart flutter.

You open your arms for the boy who looks at you warily. “Are you sure, (Y/N),” he asks. You nod quickly and he stands up, falling into the pullout and wrapping you into his arms. He tucks your head under his chin, pulling you closer.

“JJ,” you ask.

It's his turn to hum in response. “This may be weird for you, but I feel like I just have to say it,” you tell him. JJ pulls back just enough to look into your eyes. He's worried about what you are going to say but tries to hide it for your sake. “I love you, J.”

JJ smiles, leaning down to nuzzle his nose with yours in an Eskimo kiss. “I love you too,” he says sincerely, but you're afraid he doesn't understand what you mean.

“No, J,” you say, looking away from his eyes, “I love you. Like, I'm in love with you.”

The blonde boy only smiles bigger. He leans down pressing a passionate kiss to your lips, pulling away when you run out of air. JJ trails sweet kisses down your jaw and neck before placing one last kiss on your lips.

“I'm in love with you too (Y/N),” he says kissing your forehead. JJ wonders how he went so long without being able to kiss you and hold you. Even after only confessing a few hours ago, it feels so natural to have you in his arms. The thought of not having you makes his heart ache. 

“I have to ask you something, but you can say no and it won't change anything and I understand that this is hard because of everything that just happened,” JJ rambles. You kiss his jaw softly, urging him to continue. “Will you be mine. Ya know. Like my girlfriend, or whatever.”

You smile wide. “Of course I'll be yours, J.”

JJ copies your smile leaning down to press another kiss to your lips.

He pulls away, snuggling into you, and the both of you bask in the feeling of being in each other's arms. Your hand reaches up to play with JJ’s hair as your eyes start to droop.

“Love ya, pretty girl.”

“Love you too, J.”

'Cause blue looks good on the sky

Looks good on that neon buzzin' on the wall

But darling, it don't match your eyes

You are sitting down on a beach towel, watching the sun slowly fall into the ocean, lighting the sky with a beautiful rainbow of colors. Your feet are outstretched in front of you and your hands prop you up behind your back. The Outer Banks heat is making your skin warm, but you don't mind, letting the steadily depleting sun hit your skin.

You watch as JJ catches another wave, surfing it perfectly. You giggle as he raises his hand in a fist, clapping for him. 

It's been two weeks since you finally ended things with Liam. You were able to mend things with the rest of the pogues and Kiara and Pope welcomed you back with open arms. Things with JJ have been going amazing. The two of you agreed to take things slowly seeing as you were just getting out of a toxic relationship. It was different to finally be in a place with JJ where you weren't afraid to show him and tell him how you feel, but you loved it.

JJ runs towards you, gripping his board in one hand as the other pushes back his blonde locks.

When he gets to your towel, JJ throws down his board and plops down next to you, pulling you into a sweet hug.

You giggle. “You're all wet, J,” you say, not making any move to get out of his warm embrace. The boy peppers your face with soft kisses causing you to giggle even more.

A few minutes later you are seated in between JJ’s legs and he has his strong arms wrapped around your waist, his head nuzzled in the crook of your neck.

“I love you, J,” you say, still watching the sunset.

“I love you too, pretty girl,” JJ says kissing your neck. He begins humming the tune to a song you recognize. 

“Blue ain't your color, umm mm,” he sings, “No, no baby, come here baby, let me light up your world.”

✰⋆✰⋆✰⋆✰

[xnchxntmxnt]

OMG HAPPY 2OO LUV!! ILYSM, AND YOU DEFINITELY DESERVE MORE!! AS EXPECTED I'M HERE FOR THE MATCHUP EVENT AND I'M SO SORRY FOR BEING LATE KSDJFHSDF

1 | name : amie 2 | pronouns : s/her 3 | preferred gender : doesn't really matter 4 | self-description :

— it's ya clown sho <3 anyway, i'm an ambivert but more inclined towards the introvert side. my MBTI is INFJ and i'm a Gemini. i'd describe myself as someone who's very observant? yea, i guess. i'm awkward and you know it. My favorite color is blue, specifically sapphire, but i love all pastel colors. My fav show is Chicago Medical and all the psychological and crime thrillers out there are my favorite ( silent patient is my #1 though ) I love painting, playing piano and basketball!

— what i look in a partner you ask, uh, someone who can tolerate my silence. there are times when i go quiet for a whole day, i'll barely speak, no interaction nothing. i want someone who'd not exactly 'deal with it' but 'understand it.' also, i want someone who i can talk to without any hesitation. i have a hard time opening up so i don't do it but when i do, i spill almost everything. i might cry, might have anxiety attack, i might even shout. i know it's not very healthy but i want someone who can help me with those. plus someone who i can read with please <3 cheating and not having any respect for personal space would be the major deal breaker for me

5 | gen. aesthetic : my fashion sense starts from sweats and ends in sweats. i'm a big fan of those oversized hoodies and shirts, like something really comfy. however, i do have a collection of formal wears like blazers and dress.

6 | color/s to describe myself : red, actually. if not read then blue. it switchers but red 90% of the times.

7 | fav song/s : literally everything by Chase Atlantic and The Neighborhood. However, my absolute favorites are some of the famous classical pieces like Experience by Ludovico Einaudi and Chopin's Ballade No. 1 Op 23.

8 | fav genre of music : classical music ( Beethoven, Einaudi and Chopin own my heart )

Lol this is very lengthy I'm sorry, btw congrats again!

I looked into MBTI, I looked into zodiacs, I went off of what you said

Here he is, the man, Seijoh’s do-it-all guy

HANAMAKI TAKAHIRO ur new boyfriend

There is not enough content for him, anyway

How You Met

Bear with me here

Think about this

Artist!hanamaki

You love painting? Art club.

Idk if youre actually in any art club but shhh

Anyway, it was probably some sort of community thing full of tons of different age artists (bc you’d have basketball or something after school and he had volleyball)

So like once a week on thursday afternoons everyone gets together and does all sorts of artsy stuff

Everyone listens to lo fi music (or you can bring headphones) and chit chat and just paint for a couple hours

Its in the back section of a library (bc the library near me does stuff like this its awesome) so if you want you can go read a book while you wait for things to dry

One day the person that ran it suggested you talked to the new guy

He was about your age, it was his first day, they didn't know what all he was good at, and tbh they thought you two would look cute together

Just the vibes yk

So you set up your canvas and stuff next to him and introduced yourself

And you guys just vibe to the playlist

He’s REALLY good

Compliments you a lot too

Which is fun because he’s cute so it makes you a little flustered

You find out you guys go to the same school and he’s on the VB team

And says he has a (practice) game that weekend and asks you to come if you can

Which you do

And they win! So its fun!

Matsukawa basically asks you out for him though

He’s heard all about you already

“You don't get it issei! She’s so pretty!! God, she touched my hand and I thought I was gonna die!!!!!” “the enthusiasm is new for you” “shut up asshole” (conversation from the night before)

So he walks up to you after the game and is like “Hey so,,, we’re going out to get some lunch, you wanna come?”

Makki thinks HES flirting with you and is pissed off about it

Until you all sit down for lunch and oh, the only open spot for him is next to you (since when is matsukawa willing to sit between iwaizumi and oikawa??)

He asked you out after art club that week (Mattsun threatened not to give him any more monster for the rest of the month if he didn't get the guts to do it)

General Headcanons

You date hanamaki, you're also dating matsukawa

There’s no separating them (good thing ur MBTIs work together too, especially for strong friendships)

This was literally my first thought

So

Good luck with both these trolls

More on that later

Of course he’s going to be worried if you go radio silent for a while, but he'll understand

There are some days he’s not gonna wanna talk either

He’s really supportive on your bad days of course

Expect a random text in the middle of the evening from him

“Hiya sweetheart, just wanted to remind you that you’re beautiful, I love you, and I hope your day is going well.”

When he’s having a bad day, the same thing is all he needs from you to keep moving

He’s a really honest person. If you want to talk to him, be prepared not to get any sugar coating. If you tell him to shut up because you don’t want advice, he will. But if you expect advice from him, expect brutally honest advice. Subtlety is not his strong suit, so when it comes to advice, he’s going to tell it like it is. He's just trying to help, yknow?

However, he’s pretty good with people, so will know how to comfort you when something is bothering you. Tea and cuddles? Gotcha. Dancing at 11pm because neither of you want to sleep yet? On it. You want him to hold you? Perfect.

He’s not like...the most touchy person? There are some things he’s really indifferent on, and other things he’s stubborn as hell with. Whatever you wanna do, though

His weakness though

⚠️this part is slightly little bit suggestive⚠️

He will randomly walk up to you and pull you against him, give you a really deep kiss, smirk and walk away like nothing happened

Like hands in hair probably almost making out and then just

Walk away

Because that’s how he kisses and it’s breathtaking every time

It’s either little temple kisses or forehead or cheek pecks or something

Or that

And probably leaves you flustered and it’s funny (to him) (and to me if I was there with you) (bc that would be funny)

Hmm I’m thinking

I’m thinking hair dye dates

He needs help doing his hair from time to time Y’know (he doesn’t he just likes spending time with you) and he wants to make it pink again

So he teaches you how to do his hair and even offers to dye yours one day

Either just a strand or the ends or everything, up to you

Imagine having twinning hair dye with makki isn’t that cute

I think it’s cute

I said ur platonically dating mattsun right

Yes you are now

He absolutely adores you and loves how much makki loves you

Probably would have asked you out if makki didn’t but he was really pushing for makki to because he was just all over you in the beginning

He wasn’t overly attached to you romantically so being friends? Perfect. Sounds great

You two get along wonderfully though like you act like siblings once you warm up to each other

Again, very brutally honest person, but a little more awkward so doesn’t know what he’s saying might come off as he’s acting like a dick

He doesn’t try to though and he does really care about you

Flat out told makki if he breaks up with you and breaks your heart he’s gonna kick his ass (makki doesn’t know he had the same (less aggressive) conversation with you)

Tbh all of the VBC at seijoh loves you

Oikawa loves talking to you he thinks you’re great for makki

Gets you in on he and makki and mattsun’s antics

Iwa thinks you’re good too he just doesn’t know you as well

I think that kunimi would like you (he was almost a runner up--)

Kindaichi too

The first years just think you’re cool even if they won’t say it out loud

Seijoh VBC loves you

You got mattsun’s approval

And hanamaki loves you with literally everything in his life

So

You’re pretty set with your strawberry baby huh

Date Night!

SLEEPOVERS

I was waiting for some matchup to come along that gave me sleepover vibes

In a perfect world where you could do sleepovers with your bf because most parents would,,,not let that happen

Imagine…

He shows up at like 7:00 after practice, pizza in hand because he picked up dinner

You two eat, chat about your day, he probably scarfs down half the pie bc it’s after practice ofc he’s hungry

So when you guys are done eating you head up to your room

And make pillow fort

It’s mandatory

Different design every time, but there’s a pillow fort nonetheless

And then when there’s just enough room for the both of you to climb in

You get a blanket and a couple pillows and one of your phones or laptops or whatever and watch a movie and cuddle

When the movie is over you guys break out the face masks

You ever wonder why he has such great skin? It’s thanks to you (or if you don’t have masks, he picks them up on the way home from practice)

But anyway you guys talk shit about people for a while and sit with the masks on (it’s usually him talking about how Oikawa is a bitch as much as he loves him) (or about whatever he and Mattsun were talking about lately)

You both get chances to vent while the masks sit on your face and you just vibe with music (usually that you pick) (he listens to like,,,meme songs and like CORPSE yk)

After masks you guys make/get some snacks and munch on those during another movie but this time you’re in comfy jammies and more relaxed Y’know

Less paying attention to the movie you’ve seen a million times and just vibing in each other’s presence and it’s just really sweet

Fall asleep on his chest

Let him fall asleep on yours

Either way, you’ve got him whipped for you he loves you

Not that he doesn’t already but that’s his favorite thing ever so please just let him do that

Always makes sure to tell you he loves you before you sleep too

If you fall asleep first he takes embarrassing pictures of you with your hair being a mess & you best bet he sends them to mattsun because “she’s so cute omfg” “dude” “dude what” “you’re so fuckin stupid” “?” “Whatever—good luck being whipped just tell me when you need to get a ring, k” “you’re such a jackass” “yeah yeah Gnight”

Zodiac/MBTI

Okay so I’m not doing a big long paragraph for all this BUT from what I understand, Gemini/Aquarius are really compatible, and ENTP and INFJ are known as “perfect matches” sO (I had a really hard time deciding between Atsumu and Makki because they're both ENTP)

Psst Gemini + Leo is compatible and so is INTP + INFJ,,,, so, again, asking you to marry me sho 💍💍

Aesthetic/Vibes

Playlist

Prelude and Fugue No. 1 in C major, BWV 846

Linus and Lucy by Vince Guaraldi Trio (meme song)

Sky Full Of Stars by The Piano Guys

Someone To You by The Piano Guys

Shut Up And Dance - Simply Three

Runners Up

Miya Atsumu, Tsukishima Kei

[zu-is-here]

Hi Zu!

Really glad to know you are well. Every day I make sure to at least check asks where you update us on how you are doing, and it always makes me feel a little better to know you're okay 🌻 btw, reminds me of Drop Pop Candy, where they sing that "Every day, every day is okay!" and "Every night, every night is alright!" That's literally about you (x

As for me, yesterday I spent, like, two hours rereading your new comic, crying, and listening to the song I had in mind for Nightmare and Killer for a while. It made me so much more emotional. Infinity isn't the limit, am I right? (x This song works perfectly for Nightmare from X-tra Dark Cream, and now so does the LODESTAR, so I mixed it and... Oh well.

I woke up pretty early, as usual, but felt so exhausted that I spent the whole morning waking up and falling asleep. I think I dreamed about talking to you and several others, too?.. I'm certain there was @help-im-a-gay-fish, but I don't remember who the others were or what we were talking about. But it was pleasant, especially considering my inside-dreams-self is much more open and, well, confident. Not shy at all.

Then I spent my day translating the whole Dark Cream and LODESTAR comics for my loved one, who isn't even is the fandom but wanted to see what makes me so happy and inspired nonetheless. It was such a pleasure. And she was just as fascinated by your story as I am, she said it's absolutely beautiful and she is very grateful to have me show her this and even translate it. So my energy is still so low it is almost scary, but I'm glad and satisfied.

And now I can finally talk about the comic itself! Because I do have a lot to say, yesterday it was mostly an incoherent pile of emotions.

People have already pointed out quite a lot, so I guess I'll focus on what got personally me.

And first things first. "Being neither a human nor a monster", oh dear, I just can't. If you don't mind me asking, was it planned even before and we had some sort of congeniality, or was it a reference, or maybe something else?.. I'd honestly be delighted by any option. The only thing that actually matters is that this choice of words is here. That's all. So I'm merely curious.

Also Nightmare's bare spine in the beginning. I mean, I knew his clothes are a mess, especially from behind, but seeing this. Personally for me it was so, so important. You see, for me spine has been a very special part of body for so long now, it's just... something really personal.

Do I love Killer's smile when he is offering Nightmare his heart soul. His face looks so tender, so vulnerable with those traces of hate that's no longer there... But then there is the next panel, of course there is, and I'd like to say one thing here. Thank you for not showing Killer's eyes. I don't think I could handle it.

The duality on the fifth page. Hate flowing too much for this to be safe, ending up as that very same negativity that covered Nightmare, had lim locked. And the clean knife that won't be used. I don't see it directed at Nightmare, not really. It's just... kand of where corrupted Nightmare wanted it to be.

Or maybe it's the other way around, and it's the negativity that covered Nightmare is flowing inside Killer's eye socket? After all, the damage has been cost. After all,

Everything has consequences.

It's not something you can just save, reset or overwrite.

But, as we know,

Making mistakes and correcting them is what's life about.

...

As long as we're alive, we have a chance to make things right.

Killer and Nightmare are alive.

So on Nightmare's blind, vulnerable, helpless side there is a bare hand, a half-closed eye socket, and the serene smile that always has me mesmerised.

...

Let's continue.

That stars-and-moon metaphor is so beautiful, so true. Perfect. I might have a match for it in the X-tra Dark Cream story, thank you ever so much.

"The inner demons used to win", oh, if only Killer knew just how similar all of them are... Also another wave of inspiration here, everything fits as if it was intended to be like that from the very beginning. (I do see that smile in the dark.)

"Failure is not an option". Once again I stand to applaud your oh so clever choice of words. They are desperately trying to stick to subordination, but what I see here is so many hidden meanings, from "I believe you can do this" and "I trust you to protect me" to "Please, please, don't die, I don't see a world where you would be dead, so please be safe". Choose what you like. Or neither, of course, that's also an option.

Nightmare looks so small when Killer closes the door. So utterly broken, even though it's the only panel with (not corrupted) Nightmare where we don't see his awful cracks. Or, well, not the only one, but you know what I mean.

I wrote so much and still it's not enough, nowhere near it. But this would suffice for now. After all, I am writing a few stories based on this, and that's another way to get all of this out of one's chest, I suppose.

Once again, thank you. I love your stories and art ever so much, and I look forward to seeing more. Wish you all the best.

Sincerely,

anfie.

Hi anfie!╰(*´︶`*)╯

I'm really glad to see you again, hope you're doing good ♡ Oh do I love this song! (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)

And I'm more than happy to hear you enjoyed the spin-off that much! (〃ω〃) By the way, do you mind telling me what this song is? ☆

Such a nice dream though! Hope your day was much better (ówò) Because—oh god—translating all the comic with the spin-off!.. There's no greater happiness for a creator than inspiring others, to share their work as well, and I'm so grateful to you for that ♡ Please have a good rest!

Speaking about the spin-off, "being neither a human nor a monster" is Killer's essence Chara told him about ;3; and I'm so pleased that you noticed these vulnerable moments with Nightmare's bare back and Killer's smile while offering his soul, with the duality and that smile in the dark, — it warms my heart and makes me know the work's been done for a reason.

And thank you very, very much for quoting them since it's not just a separate piece but an integral part of the whole story. When you named the hidden meanings behind "Failure is not an option", I swear I was about to squeal — this is a direct hit.

I'm looking forward to your stories!! Again, thank you so much, and take care╰(*´︶`*)╯♡

[chateautae]

ok SO. ever since mid final came out i’ve been postponing it because … i didn’t think i could take it if i’m being honest with you. i’m not good at keeping track of time and i know that tumblr doesn’t show the dates even things were posted but after what i’m guessing has been a few months, i worked up the courage to finally finish the story.

i’m crying my eyes out.

😭 for a second there i thought i would get through it all without crying cause it was funny and cute and exceptional as usual but i was just enjoying the reading and the couple … but when they started to give their announcements. and tae said he had a surprise. and he started to give his speech.

everything about the way he highlighted the special moments and said that he would go through it all again just to be with her in the same way as that moment .., oh jesus i’m crying again

it’s so special to me and i seriously didn’t think i was gonna cry up until that moment where i just started bawling and i really want you to understand here how important that is. as a writer you’re already amazing and your goal is to connect with your audience and bring the tale to life and i’m here to tell you that having such an incredible way with words and being able to craft and convey your story in a way that touches others so deeply that it makes them cry?? even if they’re complete strangers? it’s a level of just. perfection that i can’t even begin to describe so i wanted to tell you as the author thank you and i’m really proud of you and it’s so so amazing that you’re able to bring such strong physical emotions out of others and i hope you realize how significant that is.

but yeah everything about that was perfect and oh god the ending with the hyyh and then their vows and the setting and the way you ended it was so beautiful and then you had to add that last sentence about peonies. thereby adding the last nail in my coffin. and your a/n was so short and sweet it made me cry TOO 😭 i knew more was coming in the epilogue but still. everything about this was so heartbreakingly perfect i miss mid so much already and it will always have such. a special place in my heart. i remember i started reading pretty early when it was posted? about chapter 5 i believe and i’m really grateful i was able to be here for most of the journey. i thank you for crafting such a beautiful story and i send you so much love!! i haven’t read the epilogue yet cause i’m already distraught enough for tonight (it’s 2 am lol) and i wanna convince myself that it’s still not over! but i will soon and i just know that it’s gonna be perfect. again i send you so much love and thank you for this masterpiece of a story <333

ps. idk if you remember the anon that recommended you xo by beyoncé and said that it fit the mid couple super well? that was me haha and i want to say that her song smash into you is thee most mid song in existence please listen to it and if you do get to this ask pls listen to it before you answer it and let me know what you think!! it makes me cry all the time and i think it fully embodies our lovely couple. also, there’s a duet version - look up smash into you duet on youtube it’s an edit/mashup with beyoncé and jon mclaughlin. i think the beyoncé version is best lol obviously but the duet version can be seen as our mid couple duetting together and the lyrics match them so perfectly i think it’s beautiful🥺 okay i wrote so much now i’m done but thank you again <33 purple you

It took me so long to reply to this message because wow... just WOW. I almost teared up reading this because the amount of love and just heart-warming words in this really got to me 😭 THANK YOUUU so much for dedicating the time to read mid and for joining me along the way, it's been such a wonderful journey and I'm so glad to hear you loved the ending!!!

UGH your words are just making me cry I'm so happy that as an author I really can do the one thing I've always wanted to do, which was reach people and just let them escape to an entirely different universe. It makes me feel over the moon knowing this couple is so deeply loved and it's wonderful knowing they made you feel like this. It's truly a blessing to hear these words and I can't express my gratitude enough for this, thank you for sending this lovely lovely message!! AND AHHH PLEASE THE LYRICS?? ARE SO BEAUTIFUL DEQDUQEB "me and you belong, I wanna run, smash into you" BEYONCE ALWAYS DELIVERS and yes loves ofc i remember you!! Haha you're the reason I legitimately added XO to my main playlist 😭

Thank you once again for sending this message, you actually made me reread the last chapter and I myself completely teared up and cried too because as an author there was just so much of myself I healed through the story and seeing where this couple ended up just reminded me all over again of why I ever started the series, so thank you anon, I hope I continue to receive your lovely lovely support in the future!! 💓💓