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agentsoftie · 4 years ago

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stitches and ditches

summary: y/n and spencer get in a fight. due to the fight y/n goes to the hospital where she gets taken. spencer has to find her before it’s to late

a/n: plot holes. plot holes everywhere. so i’m sorry for that, super sorry. also like i don’t really know how to write fight scene and stuff ig so sorry if it sucks. and i skipped like 3 classes for this, so don’t let it flop

warnings: fight, angry spencer, torture, a case, violent spencer (idrk what to call it) and whole lotta angst. i happy ending though! kinda, idrk

word count & pairing: spencer x (fem) reader & 4.1k

remember to like and reblog!!

It all started the day he came home from work. This was one of the longest trips he’d been on so you decided to make him his favorite. Pumpkin Pie. And god knows how hard it is to make pie, but you did it anyways, for him. It wasn't too late when he got home but It wasn't too early either. More like the time right after dinner and just before dessert. You had just got the pie out of the oven when you heard the door open and someone walk in.

“Spencer! Finally you’re home! How are you!” You said while he put his bag away. He didn't turn to look at you yet which was kinda weird since the first thing he does when he gets home is kiss you right on the lips. “Fine,” He mumbled while sitting down at the table still not looking at you. “Spencer, come on what’s wrong?” You asked while grabbing his hands, but he immediately retracted. Which made sense because of who he was, but you’re not gonna admit that it didn't hurt. “Nothing Y/N.”

You knew that something was wrong, and it didn't take a profiler to see that. Everything about him was just off. “Come on, it's me. You can tell me anything.”

“Y/N.” Spencer said in a deep tone. You’d never heard him like this or seen in that sense. He was always happy to see you, to be with you. And were with his too. “Spencer no, come on. I can see that you’re clearly not fine. So come on, open up.”

“Y/N I said I’m fine!” You were appalled. He had never raised his voice at you, but it was bound to happen one day, you just. You just were shocked. “Spencer,” You said in a low voice completely contradicting his loud yell. “What!”

“Spencer calm down!” You say yelling at him. Although you realized that yelling at someone to calm down probably wasn't the best way to do it.

“No Y/N, you need to just stop and shut up!” Shut up. That’s the first time he’s ever told you to shut up. Infact, you think it's the first time he’s ever told anyone to shut up.

“Spencer just talk to me! It’s not that fucking hard!”

“No Y/N it is. It's tremendously hard and you just wouldn't understand.”

“Just tell me. And I'll see if I understand. But don't just gatekeep your emotions and feelings.”

“Y/N I said no! Why cant you listen to simple fucking directions! It’s not that fucking hard!” Each and every time he yelled at you, it's like your heart physically broke. And you could feel it breaking. But how do you tell him to stop? All you wanted was to know how he feels. Was that really so hard?

“Spencer why the hell are you acting like this! I understand that your job is hard but that doesn't mean that you can pour all your anger out on me! And if you are gonna do that, you can at least do the kind thing and share how you feel! And what's wrong! I mean, is that really so much to ask!”

“Oh really, that's how you wanna play this! You think this is just a little game don’t you!”

“Game Spencer! You think I play this as a game! Well this game is my life!” You were drop dead angered at this point. “What in the world gives you the right to act like this! Please, explain!” All he does is scoff at you. “I'm not joking Spencer! Why the hell are you acting like this! You've changed!”

“Oh I’ve changed! Y/N you've changed! You're always trying to kiss up my ass! I mean jesus! All you want is money! Like god!”

“Oh I want money! Spencer! I don't need your pathetic money! It may not have dawned on you since you couldn't bother to care, but I make a good amount of money. Yeah, you’re not the only one who paid for this place. So stop acting like you are.”

“Oh wow! Haha, you sick son of a,” He stopped immediately after realizing what exactly he was saying.

“Say it Spencer! Finish the goddamn sentence!”

“Y/N, you know I wont.” He says in a shift of tone. Still equally as affecting though.

“Why? Huh? You've already said so much, just wrap it up with a nice little red bow on top!”

“Y/N, stop,” He said, his tone getting more and more demeaning by the second.

“Do it Spencer! Do it!”

“Goddamn it Y/N I said stop!!” He yelled before throwing a glass at the wall behind you. You both immediately shut up, as trying to process what just had happened. Did he actually just try to hurt you? No, Spencer would never do that. Would he? You touched the back of your head and felt blood on your ear. You looked down at the blood and Spencer walked towards you but all you did was pull back from his touch.

“Don’t,” You mutter in fright. Putting your hands up against his chest, but not touching. His eyes looked at you as if they were trying to say something but just couldn't. You grabbed your purse, keys, phone, a coat, and slipped into some shoes. “Y/N, where are you going?”

“To the clinic or hospital or whichevers open right now. To get this checked out and stitched up.”

“Y/N, come on just stay here. I can stitch it up. I can do everything. Just dont leave. Im sorry, okay. I- I don't know why I did that. I promise I didn't mean too.” He begs and pleads but you just can't say with him tonight. No, not tonight. Tonight was too bad, tonight was a dent that was not going to be fixed.

“I just can't, Spencer. Okay, not tonight. There’s some pasta in the fridge, and I love you… I guess.” And with that you got in your car and left leaving Spencer to just sit in his own tears. He just sat at the table thinking of everything he did wrong. Everything that went wrong. And the worst part is that absolutely nothing wrong or bad happened at work today. He was just exhausted, that's all. And instead of telling his girlfriend, he started a fight. And he knew that you were in the right, for everything.

“Hi, Y/N. I’m Dr. Michael Gray. And it looks like something happened to your ear.” He says while standing at the door.

“Oh hi! Haha. And um… I thought that nurses were supposed to, you know, stitch up stitches.”

“Oh yeah, well they are. But you’re just so gorgeous I pass up the offer.”

“Oh, haha,” You say, not knowing how to feel. Although there was one thing you knew, and that was that this was uncomfortable as hell. “Well, I mean I do have a boyfriend.” You said just so he wouldn't try to make any moves.

“Oh well hey! Do you have any siblings or friends? I'm fine with absolutely anyone and everyone.” He says while disinfecting your ear and pulling the glass out.

“You’re Pan?” You ask to distract yourself from the pain.

“Yeah. You’re not gonna request another doctor now right?” He asks while carefully taking out the glass and putting it on a white napkin in front of you. That was a big piece.

“No, of course not!” You say in offence. “How could you ever think that.”

“It happens a lot with people. Especially the pretty ones. They automatically get turned off when I tell them I like everyone. I don't care about your gender, just your personality and how you treat me.”

“Oh well I would never. And it sucks that-that happens.”

“Yeah. Okay, so here comes the fun part. Hey, how did you even get these stitches? Or, why do you need them? Like how did you get to this point?” He says while slowly stitching up your ear.

“Ha, I get it. You’re just fine. And all of this is due to my boyfriend.” You say in pain.

“Wait,” He stops doing what he’s doing and just stands there. “Your boyfriend did this?”

“Yes. And before you say anything else, I am not in an abusive relationship. Okay, he just had a bad day and I guess I made it even worse. And trust me, he didn't mean to do it.” You say as he finishes stitching up your ear.

“Do you have a place to stay tonight?” He asks while pouring out a liquid into a small cup.

“No.”

“Then, come stay with me. At my place. And here drink this, it’ll help with the pain. A lot.”

He says while giving you a small cup filled with what looked like to be a crushed up powder poorly mixed in with water. Or whatever that the liquid was.

“Oh no. We just met.” You spoke before drinking it.

“You got anywhere better to stay? Plus my shift ends in 5 so it would be the most practical decision.”

You knew that it was wrong. After everything that Spencer had told you. But for some reason you still went. Even though you knew you should have gone back home to Spencer. And god knows what he was doing right now. But you couldn't just let your pride fall and go home. That would be pathetic. “You know what, okay! I mean what the hell! You seem nice and I’m not in the mood to face him again. Or at least for now.”

“Sweet!”

“Just one question… are you gonna kill me?” It was a stupid question to ask, you know. But after everything that Spencer and his family have been through. And with what happened to haley, you just couldn't help but to ask.

“No Y/N, I’m not gonna kill you. Now come on, let me get logged out and let's leave this place. Oh and Y/N, you can call me Michael.” He says while taking off his lab coat.

“Okay Michael.”

He brought you into his car and the drive to his place felt like hours. Although you really couldn't remember most of it since you passed out a quarter way through. The last thing you do remember is him putting his hand on your thigh and looking over at you with a smirk.

It had been 3 days. 3 days since you left to get your ear stitched up. 3 days since Spencer had last seen you. Since you had seen him. Or any of your friends. 3 days since you left your life. In those 3 days, Spencer completely lost himself. All of the books were on the floor. The bed was an absolute mess. And the kitchen was left just as it was the night it happened. He, himself, was a mess. His hair had not been brushed. He was still wearing the same clothes. And he’d been surviving on coffee and granola bars.

“Guys, we got a new case, come on.” Penelope chimes as they all do paper work. Spencer can’t help but look at his phone every 2 minutes just waiting for a text or call or any sign of life and/or love.

“What’s wrong pretty boy?” Derek asks.

“Yeah, you've been acting tense lately.” JJ adds.

“Nothing, It’s just Y/N,” He gruffs.

“Do I smell relationship problems,” Derek says jokingly.

“Derek!” JJ scoffs. “What's wrong Spence?”

“Nothing I just�� Look, something happened, and now she’s not answering any of my text and calls, and I'm starting to get worried. That's really all there is.”

“Well what happened exactly? To you know, make her leave I guess.” JJ asks.

“Um, we had an argument. A pretty bad one. I came home after the case. The Checkersfeild one. And um, I was just tired. And instead of telling her that, I got super mad and said some things that I regret. And also did a thing I regret. A lot. And I would explain everything to her if she answered whenever I called or texted but she didn't.”

“How bad was the argument?” She asks again.

“Pretty bad. It was our first, but it was really bad. Just words coming and pouring out.”

“Spencer, how long have you and Y/N been dating?” Derek asks in shock at the fact that he just said ‘first argument’.

“2 and half years now.”

“And you two have never fought? What's this secret that you're keeping from me.”

“Well you know, we had our mutual disagreements. And sometimes we argued a little but it was small and it lasted for like an hour. And right after we would apologize and everything would be okay. It would all be fine.” Spencer said, his voice got longer and slower as the words went on.

“Wow, um… Spencer. You really love her, don't you.” Derek asked.

“Yeah. I really do, don't I.” Spencer says while walking into the briefing room.

As everyone sat down Derek couldn’t help but to keep looking at him. He knew that Spencer was hiding something, he just didn't know what. Or how to figure it out.

“Okay everyone this is Isabella Stines. The latest victim of our new unsub. Police are calling him The Ditcher. Since, as you can see, they leave the body in ditches after what looks like hours and hours of tourture. 5 other people were found too. First was Mindy Kindle, then Jake Johnson. Next, Rosé Hinnings, then we have Jennifer Gordon. And last, and hopefully least, Kross Noing. The ‘K’ is silent.” Penelope says while everyone looks down at the picture of the crime scenes and blood smeared across the screen.

“Do they have anything in common?” Spencer asks just before his phone starts ringing. He immediately picks it up even though the rule that Hotch made up states that you can't answer phones when you’re in the briefing room getting briefed for a new case. “Y/N.” Spencer asks, not knowing who this was since he didn't have enough time to look at the caller ID. “No, this is Sharron Richard, her boss. She hasn't shown up to work for these past days and we’re getting worried. She has a case coming up and this is a big one for her. We’ve been trying to contact her, but she’s not answering. So we called you since she left you as her backup or whatever you call it. So, have you seen or heard from her?” Sharron asks over the phone.

“Um no I- I haven't.” Spencer mutters through the phone so no one except Sharron could hear it. Although that failed miserably.

“Oh, okay. Well if you hear from her, or see her anytime soon. Please tell her to contact us.” And with that the phone was hung up.

“Pretty boy what was that?” Derek asks.

“Uh, nothing. Just a call from Y/N’s work. Apparently she’s been missing. Although you already knew that so…” Spencer said while looking down at his phone more time, then putting it away. Everyone just gave him this weird look of dissatisfaction.

“Okay anyway, yes there are some similarities. And luckily, all of these are taking place here so you guys won't be flying out anywhere! Or wait, isn't that a bad thing?” Penelope exclaims.

“Garcia,” Hotch says in his natural stearn and damning voice.

“Sorry boss. Anyways, The ME found traces of propofol and thiopental in each of their systems. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's basically a drug that doctors use to get patients into a coma before surgeries and/or if it's needed medically.”

“So only doctors would have access to it?” Emily asks.

“Over here in Virginia, yes. There are no stores that sell it here due to too many people ODing.” Spencer answers. “Garcia, did the ME find any signs of sexual assault?”

“No they did not. Looks like it was just tourture.”

“Hey Garcia, did they have anything else in common?” Emily asks.

“Yeah check this out. Each of the victims have a medical visit to “The Charleston Hospital” the night before dying. Or getting captured at least. And, it looks like each of them came in after what looked like an action of abuse. It was hard to spot but luckily the bill got it.”

“Okay, thank you Garcia. JJ, Prentiss, come with me. We’re going to the crime scene. Rossi, you go to the ME. Morgan and Reid stay here and try to find some things and connections. And Garcia, you just do what you do best.” Hotch says while getting up.

Everyone was gone from the briefing room except for Garcia who was taking down some files, and Spencer, who was looking at the file. But one part in particular. Could it have happened. No, it couldnr have. Could it?

“Hey Garcia?” He asked.

“Yes sugar,”

“Can I get something?”

“Why of course, what is it that you need?”

“Um, I need records and security tapes.”

“Come with me my sweet child.” She says while walking out the door and into her office, or as she likes to call it, batcave.

“Okay here are the records for-” She got cut off by a frantic Spencer.

“No, not for them, but for Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Your girlfriend?” She asks.

“Yes, my girlfriend.”

“Um, okay. So yeah. It looks like she went to Charleston um about 3 nights ago for some stitches.”

“And the security tapes. From that night. Can you see where she went? Or if she got in her car?”

“You doubt me. Don't doubt me. Okay so here. It looks like she got into this car. But, it looks like there is someone with her. Im sorry Spencer.”

“Don't be. Just, what’s the licence plate numbers?”

“Um, 56HI90ZC3. Spencer, if you want, we can talk about it.” She says in a soft tone. Thinking that his girlfriend would be cheating on one of her friends.

“No not now. I just need you to track that car, can you do that?”

“Done. Okay so it looks like the last time the car was spotted was here, Cherry Ann Avenue. It looks like they took a turn in this field, and that's all.”

“Great, I need you to contact Hotch and Rossi, and tell them that we got the guy.”

“On it. But, hey do you wanna talk about it?”

“Garcia, we don't have any time. Someone I love is in danger and I don't wanna waste a single second.”

You woke up to the smell of blood, the sound of crickets, and a gut wrenching pain, everywhere across your body.. Crickets everywhere. You looked down to see many cuts. Cuts all over your body, everywhere. And in one place, you swear you saw a knife. What had happened? How long was I out? You tried to remember everything but all you could was getting in a fight with Spencer and then getting in a car with a doctor. Or a nurse, or whoever they were.

“Ah, so you're up.” Michael said as he walked up from the shadows behind him.

“Who are you and what do you want?” You say trying your best to back away from him but something ties you down.

“You forgot who I am already. I must have added a little more meds in there for you. Huh, well that's alright. I’m Michael. More professionally, Dr. Michael Gray.” You just sat there trying to hear him over the intense pain you were in. Almost as if you'd been stabbed 100 times, maybe you had, who knows. “You see, your boyfriend was being the abusive piece of shit he is and so now I'm helping you. Helping you get better.”

“You sick bastard. You're not helping me, you're causing me pain.” You say as he gets closer and closer to your face.

“Shut up!!” He says as he slaps you. “I know what I’m doing!! Do you know how many people I’ve put out of misery!!” He yells in your face. You can feel the spit reaching your face as he does this.

“You’ve hurt those people. You've put them through pain. So much pain. Instead, you could have helped them. But this, this is not help, no this is torture, abuse, assult.”

“I SAID SHUT UP!!” He yelled while throwing the metal tray on the table across the room. “YOU KNOW WHAT, MAYBE WHAT YOU'RE PATHETIC LITTLE BOYFRIEND DID TO YOU WAS GOOD. YOU DESERVED IT!! Don't deserve me, or my help!”

You were shocked. You were scared. You were terrified. But you didn't want to admit it. And the sad part is, all he truly wanted to do is help you. But just at that moment you heard sirens. Sirens everywhere, and they got louder and louder until you saw the colors. Flashing up against the brown wooden wall and the shag carpeting on the floor.

Suddenly you heard a loud bang, the door had come down. “Michael Gray!” You heard someone yell. “Michael, we know what you've done, and we know that you’re here!”

“No, this can't be happening. No no no no no. NO!” He yelled in panic. The most stupid thing to do when you’re trying to hide.

Suddenly 3 people came rushing to the room. One of them happened to be your boyfriend. Who ran over to you immediately without any hesitation.

“Hey Y/N, it's me, Spencer. You're gonna be okay.” He said while holding you. All you did was smile and nod. You wanted to tell him that you loved him, but you just couldn't. You were so sore and tired. And all you wanted to do was go to sleep. Even though you knew that you shouldn't have since, well, you know. You would probably die. But you just couldn't help it.

You woke to a bright light. Or multiple in this case. Why was everything so white. White hurts people. You felt a tug to your hand as you saw who was holding it, Spencer. He stayed. And for god knows how long. He was asleep, and you didn't want to wake him. Poor boy looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep for the past week or so. You checked the clock as the time read 10:37pm. Perfect, just the most perfect time to wake up. You tried to grab your phone, but you had to stretch to get it, and you were not doing that.

Spencer, although woke up from your failed attempt at grabbing your phone. “Y/N, you're awake.” He said dreamily with his eyes half shut.

“Hi Spencer.”

Once he truly realized what was going on, he jumped up from his seat and gripped your hand tighter than before. “Y/N baby, how are you? Are you okay?”

“Well, truthfully. No, I am not okay. I mean, I just got tortured for god know how long, and I think I’ve been asleep. But again, I don't know how long. And oh god, I had my case that I’ve been working on for the past 6 months that was supposed to happen and I missed it!” You say as if the world was ending. He just looks at you. No emotion, just stares.

“Y/N it’s okay. I sorted that out, don't worry. You’re just okay. Why did you go with them anyway?”

You don't know how to respond. Do you tell him everything, or tell him nothing at all. Do you leave out some bits? No, he deserves to hear the whole truth. “Spencer, after what happened that night, I was terrified of what was gonna happen if I came home. And my friends were out of town. So I really had no choice.”

“Y/N,” His voice cracked. “I am so sorry for what I did to you. I truly didn't mean to do that, it just happened. And I don't know why.”

“I know.”

“You probably hate me, and I get that. I would hate me too if I were you. I mean, look at what I put you through. I’m so sorry. And I understand if you wanna breakup and stuff. But, I just wanna say that I love you. I truly do.”

“Spencer,” You say while looking down at your hands, then back up. “I don't hate you. I could never hate you. Not after everything you’ve done for me. I love you, I do.”

He just smiled and kissed you on your forehead. “Y/N, you wanna about it?”

“Talk about what?”

“Everything that happened today.”

“Sure, but how about we talk about everything that happened the other day. I mean, I made you pie Spencer, Pie!” He just sat there while you were laughing looking into your eyes. “I love you.” He said. You just smiled and held his hand, “I love you too.”

tagging: @criminalmindsmoodrn, @marshmallowtraver, @ghostly-angelic, and @himarisolace

#criminal minds #spencer reid #reader x spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #mgg x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer #mira writes

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atsumiye · 3 years ago

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Hi this is your therapist anon back at it with asking what happened to your day lol.

Everytime I log in, I see you and I wonder, "oh no. what happened this time"

omg hey bae :D the fact that thats the first thing you think of when you see me is truly my peak of this app.

HERE IS MY RANT UNDER THE CUT AGHFDGK

OKAY lets start with the fact that its a monday. bc who likes mondays. ANYWHO i woke up and was exhausted for no reason bc i actually started going to sleep at a decent time but i decided to open tumblr and the literal first post i saw made me so angry :D i wont talk about it too much but like....this person made me angry but ill MOVE ON anyway. then my stomach starts to hurt #IBSwarrior and im like on the verge on tossing myself onto the floor and forgetting about life but the rest of the day i just feel so gross but after a while it started to go away a bit. and i had this cute start of the week outfit in my head only to try it on. and i look like a cowboy. SCREAMING BC I LIVE IN EASTERN EUROPE. THESE OLD LADIES STARE WHEN I WEAR A TSHIRT AND JEANS AND NOW I LOOK LIKE A COWBOY?? I WONT MAKE IT OUT ALIVE yk. THEN idk if i mentioned but i have to write a thesis paper for one of my classes and only have 2 WEEKS TO WRITE A 22 PAGE PAPER????? ONE THAT STUDENTS WORK ON FOR AN ENTIRE YEAR??? but its in pairs so its a bit less work but but me and my friend had to write 4 pages today and we decided to split it but IDK when someone decided to change the definition of the word split bc i did 3 pages?? and she did 1??? so unless webster dictionary decided split now means an unequal share then what the fuck yk??? BUT then we get a break and i stupidly decide im going to drink some coffee and go to my next class. if i could go back in time and personally smack myself i would bc WOW that coffee did not do me well. BASICALLY we had to present this study worksheet we did and my group decides I HAVE to be the one to present it. and right before we have to go up and present,,, the coffee makes itself KNOWN. i wont get into too much detail but im ready to pass out on the floor while waiting to present and i mention it to my friends and they are like, ¨dont be nervous its not a big deal." and im like NO IT IS A BIG DEAL IM GONNA CRY and so i had to pretend like i wasnt in severe pain while talking about how i would conduct a cohort study on whether elevated levels of blood cholesterol are related to a risk in incidence of strokes. THEN THEN i run out to go to the bathroom ONLY FOR SOMEONE TO BE IN THERE and thats so embarrassing bc i like YANKED on the door and it was locked and someone was inside so i was like fuck that ill wait till i get home. then my friend decides now is the perfect time to take her sweet ass time to speak with our professor about god knows what so i miss my bus and the only one that goes to my house is in 30 minutes??? im ready to explode so thats not gonna work but one of my other friends suggests we can rent a little car and drive home. BAD IDEA she is a horrible driver </3 she drove on one way roads the wrong way, on sidewalks, she sped through old town, and im like holding on for dear life clenching every muscle in my body type beat. i got home took a nap bc i was still feeling sick. i went to the store to buy some things and i get all the way home only to realize i forgot tomatoes. TOMATOES. i bought 2783 other things i didnt need but forgot the one thing i did need??? now bc that wasnt enough today is the jewish new year and im celebrating by myself :(( so i decide to order some food form one of my favorite restaurants only for it to be MEDIOCRE AT BEST. and it made my stomach hurt. and now im sitting in bed <33

anyway this was so nice to type out bc it makes me feel better SOB thank you for always asking omg

#in the fishnet #><>.anon #THERAPIST ANON I LOVE YOU

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clementineesotsm · 4 years ago

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THE KING: ETERNAL MONARCH EP 11, My Appreciation and How It Made Me Feel

The Police and Lee Rim found Luna, just when the police about to catch Luna, a truck hit his car. Drastically. I think this scene is overboard, people probably die if he got hit like that 🤣 but okay. So in conclusion Lee Rim got Luna first. I kind of hope the police got her first and wish to see what Gon wants to do with her once he saw her before everything got into mess. But im not KES. So the story goes:

Lee Rim offers Luna a new life - JTE life. Healthy, having loving parents, having a job, all the opposite of Luna. I always love the scene with the bad people, so this one is 💕 I like the dialogue here about Luna being hurted by LR words that she dont have anything and about to die. Damn KGE acting 💯 and i love this words 상처받았어 (my feelings hurted)

The death of Prince Buyeong parallel to what happen in eps 1 when Gon’s father died, we can see the same reindition of Gon breakdown crying after holding it for the sake of the ceremony. I feel bad for him. But i have to admit, Lady Noh’s cry was breaking my heart the most. Damn 😭

JTE and KSJ looking for SJH now, because JTE knew that she is with LR, if they can find her they pretty much can track LR.

Meanwhile Luna accept LR offer, she comes to see the yoyo boy basically to say goodbye. To ask him taking care of her belonging. This scene is short but powerful, starting from YB hand Luna her knife

YB “this was in the pocket”

Luna “i did not come for that. You can keep it. Use it to protect what belongs to you”

YB “going off to steal again?”

Luna “do you believe god exist?”

YB “nod”

Luna “then i think i will be punished”

Luna “by the way that yoyo, why is the string red?”

YB “i hooked it up myself”

This conversation disturbed my mind, so during watching i looked up about the red string and the word 엮다 . I found both were kind of connected. The red thread of fate is a famous believes in east Asia about 2 people connected with this thread who are destined lovers, regardless of place, time or circumstances. While i think in this series its not only linked to the lovers (JTE and Gon) but also with the 2 world overall. This boy kind of play fate or so i assume maybe he is a deity in disguise who watch and control, because he said he is the one who 엮 it, he weave, link and hooked it. AMAZING.

While still pretty much in vain, Gon need to face his annoying cousin who shows 0 simpathy. He thinks he is second in line after Gon, but Gon decide it belongs to his sister. Because Gon trust Prince Buyeong judgement on his son. We can see that the kindom was actually wiretapping Prince Buyeong as well. I assume this is due to the treason that happened 25 years ago, to prevent any royal family betrayal again. Still its kind of rude in my opinion. But this scene was intense i love LMH acting here. Great. I really cannot believe he once plays gu junpyo 🤣

Gon in furious and angry mode is not something i imagine he will be. LR was definitely provoke him with this and he is angry. I love the time stop and Gon throwing the ring in anger here. Amazing. Also the music!

Gon was about to go after LR to Korea but then PM Koo hold him by releasing an article about King always out of palace and cause a fuss. Means Gon tied to the palace. So now we are clear, PM is a bad person, she is becoming -1. Though i still have faith in her before. But damn im wrong. I like Gon’s line here “PM Koo has pulled the gag”

Back to Korea, LR is trying to recruit KSJ! This is probably also the moment i want to see because i think KSJ has a potential to be bad. I love this scene much because the fighting was cool and this traitor doppelgänger character was damn annoying! At first i though he wants to kill KSJ but then he gave him the 2G phone. Wow. I appreciate him coming to the office and telling JTE the truth about what happen. I like what KSJ is saying here :

KSJ “what are we after? And where are we headed?”

JTE “i dont have the exact answer to that yet. So i’ll just keep going. I was told that we’ll arrive somewhere if we keep going. If we walk far enough, that is”

As what in Alice In Wonderland . I love the reference, resemblance and consistency.

Gon in Corea was looking at Prince Buyeong daily log to see anything suspicious because as what the news said Gon wants to investigate the case himself. He found that Prince Buyeong actually went to the Eosu Bookstore in the slums. He is thinking what is this clue, he remembers what Prince Buyeong said to him “the footsteps you take by risking your whole life is whats fate” brb crying first before continue 🥺🥺

Gon asking armed royal guard to follow him. Omg what is going to happen!!

Apparently Gon going to ask about Eosu Bookstore to the prisoners , 1 says dont know, 1 did not want to speak. He thinks Gon is not able to hurt him 🤣 bye bye, Gon finally announce that he is making a special law to beheaded the traitor and he did. Gon becoming darker and definitely can do up to this extent when needed. I cant believe it. Great development, i love seeing people dark side 💯 i also think the zoom out to Gon’s face and the camera position were added the tension of this. The camera technique definitely important to added deep to scene like this 💯

To be continue..

#the king eternal monarch #tkem #lee min ho #kim go eun #woo do hwan #jung eun chae #kim kyung nam #lee jung jin #kim eun sook #kdrama

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oh-for-fic-sake · 5 years ago

Text

Dont Leave Camp

Im not entierly happy with the ending but i hope you enjoys it i have a few different imagines im tweaking atm which will hopefully be up within the next couple of days xx

Masterlist

Warnings: spanking, swearing, mentions of periods

A certain witcher punishes you for disobeying him

Dont Leave Camp

You huffed as you sat at the fire with Ciri and Jaskier. Yennefer had gone to the village on the other side of the small wood for something. To be honest you were to busy pouting to listen and Geralt had made his way in the opposite direction to take care of a small contract. You werent staying in the village as there had been an outbreak of a pneumonia it had killed four people then apparently the bodies attracted ghouls who were killing more people who was attracting more ghouls. Vicious cycle when you think about it. Which was what Geralt had been hired to get rid of. So the three of you were confined to the camp. You pulled your new black fur trimmed cloak tighter pushing away the hair that fell into your eyes, you cringed it was soo greasy to the point your scalp hurt. Shifting you grimanced as the other reason you were desperate for a bath made itself known. Thats right your pill had worn off and you had your fucking period which probably wasnt helping your mood. You didnt see any reason why you couldnt quickly have a bath in the village then return but no. Yennefer had put her foot down when you had asked. You tried to argue that your immune system was going to be better than theirs and that you knew the appropriate steps to take but Geralt had stepped in agreeing with her then left ordering you to stay at camp and that you could all bathe in the stream tomorrow. They didnt understand that your used to a much better hygiene routine then the people here. You sighed again seething not even aloud to bathe and Geralt definatly knew why you needed one. Having enough you got up going to your tent grabbing your wash cloth, soap and fresh undergarments leaving your cloak on the bed roll catching both Ciri and Jaskiers attentionas you made your way back out.

"What are you doing?" He asked tentatively

"Im going to find a stream and bathe." You said tersely befor making your way out across camp. Ciri got up befor grasing your arm pulling you back

"But Geralt said its not safe, you should wait untill tomorrow" you sighed and patted her hand.

"Im not waiting i really really really need a bath, im only having a quick rinse ill be about 10 mineuts ,if that? besides im going in the opposite direction to geralt and the ghouls" she didnt look convinced turning to Jaskier for back up

"Why do you even need one that bad you smell fine to me?" He offered a weak argument.

"Why? Ill tell you why iv spent all day sitting in blood stained knickers" you growled out at him ,he went a funny shade of green.

"Right then. 10 mineuts .be back before Geralt." You nodded and patted Ciri's head as you walked past

"No wait y/n i really think you should wait you dont want to make him angry" she tried to convince you to stay

"Ciri i'll be fine ok its not that far" you called over your shoulder as you made your way towards a small stream. You frowned as you went deeper into the wooded area and still couldn't hear the tell tale sound of the stream the camp had quickly dissapeared. It must have been nearly 10 mineuts before you heard it the trickling of water quickening your steps before you heard somthing else. You froze scanning the area with a shiver of fear before stepping backwards. As you heard things moving around in the woods the hairs on the back of your neck stood on end. You held your breath as you heard the mix of inhuman growls and bushes and twigs snapping under the weight of what ever it was. Your heart was trying to beat out of your chest. You decided it was time to go back to camp stepping back slowly retracing your steps slowly and quietly. You squeeked out when you saw a hideous creature crawling around the bushes a few feet infront of you quickly spotting another three wandering aimlessly with it. You ducked holding your hand across your mouth trying to quiet your panicking breaths tears flowed freely down your face. You found yourself shaking from quiet sobs as your fear took hold trying to scamper backwards faster. What ever it was began sniffing the air making their way towards you then they found you snapped their gazes locking onto you. You dropped your things hefting your skirt and ran as fast as you could with them on your tail. You screamed as loud as you possibly could trying to get anyones attention looking either side of you as one ran along side you and dived at you, quickly changing direction your thighs burned you jumped over small rocks and logs. You heard them behind you screaming bloody murder as one pounced onto you just clipping your dress you lost your footing crashing to the forest floor skidding down a small slope your vision was blurred with tears as you used the slope to roll up onto your feet staggering and continued running through an opening in the woods you cried out as your foot was snagged again by the one behinde you. Tumbling to the ground you felt its weight on you. Befor you heard an order being barked at you from infront of you.

"HEAD DOWN!!" You obeyed tucking your forhead into the dirt as seconds later you felt a rush of wind across your head the grusome sound of flesh and bone being struck with a blade followed by a gush of warmth on your back. The weight was removed You made to get up only having a foot pressing you back down.

"Stay there!" You could have cried as you saw geralt standing over you staring down the other three things he stepped one foot over you putting you between them feet. They eyed him wearily before all pounceing on him. With ease he twisted around them cutting each one down quickly. He stood back then knelt down collecting you into his arms looking down at you checking to see if you were ok you swore you felt his body tremor but only once.

"Are you hurt?" You shook your head not trusting your voice as you began sobbing into his chest clawing at him he sighed heavily wrapping himself around you tighter. He let you cry yourself out before pulling back scowling at you.The tenderness he had shown was replaced with disapproval and anger.

"What the fuck did i tell you?" He growled at you he shook you by the shoulders you shook your head at him whimpering he grabbed your chin forcing you to look him in the eye

" what .did. i. tell. you?" He grit his teeth as his anger broke throuhg his voice you sniffed placing your hands on his wrist

"G-geralt im sorry" he shook your face lighty his eyes were ablaze and burned into you scalding you with his anger.

"Y-you said not t-to leave camp." You answerd between sniffles

"Thats right i said not to leave camp." He forced you to look at the mix of blood flesh and body parts strewn across the floor.

"Because those ghouls are stalking this whole area , if i hadnt found you they would have ripped you limb from limb, kept you alive as they feasted on you." He explaind as you began sobbing again trying to look away he tightened his grip slightly still carefull not to hurt your jaw.

"No look because thats how i could have found you." Geralt grunted he was unimpressed and realeased your face after a few moments you felt his anger rolling off of him in waves grabbing you by the scruff of your dress and hoisted you to your feet. He growled at you effectively stopping all protest

"where the fuck did you think you were going anyway?"

"I wanted a bath" you said in a small voice. He scowled at you deep as you avoided his gaze.

"So you ignored my orders and warnings about the ghouls and put your life at risk for a bath?"

"....i didnt know that they were this way.... im sorry?" He threw you over his shoulder walking across the clearing.You began wriggling trying to throw of his hold that felt like an iron bar across the back of your waist.

"Geralt im sorry"

"Oh your not sorry ! not yet" he grunted out as he tensed his arm around you.

"WhhaAh" you hissed through your teeth as he stuck your upturned bottom with more force than you'd ever experienced from him before.you put your hands on your throbbing bottom rubbing, tears gatherd in your eyes at the harsh stinging he'd caused.

"I suggest you be quiet" he sat on a stump and lower you to your feet infront of him keeping a firm grip on your wrist. Pulling at his hand looking panicked.

"Geralt, i want to go back to camp." He shook his head at you befor using one hand to unstrap his swords placing them beside him on the floor.

"You dont want me to do this in camp." His words made you stop struggleing. Your eyes grew wide as you realized what he meant when he tugged you across his thigh you bucked at him.

"NO! Nonononono please im sorry! Geralt please you cant! i didnt mean to" He held you firm dragging you skirt high leaving it to pile at the small of your back ignoring your pleas.

"I will put up with a lot but i wont have you putting yourself in dangerous situations like this if i hadn't heard you you'd be dead" He started scolding you as his held you still and struck your rear followed by a second and third each felt like a palm sized brand he quickly laid slaps across the seat of you smalls. You wailed at the instant burning sting, there wasn't a slow build up or easing you in to it. He was only holding back enough of his strength so he wouldnt cause any damage apart from a sore bottom peppered it with heavy spanks. You threw your hands back coving yourself.

"Move your hands" You wriggled against his leg shaking your head he sighed smaking each palm then pulled them up tangling them in your heavy skirt holding them still and laid four much heavier spanks to your bottom. Crying as each one fell onto your swollen bottom you pushed against the floor with your tippy toes trying to make distance between you and his offending palm.

"Geralt pl-please. im o-on my monthly" you called out around hiccups and sobs teribly afraid of bleeding on him.

"Why do you think im leaving these up? you can guarantee you'd be bare if it was any other time." He grunted at you pulling lightly on the material. Unbelievabley even this harsh spanking was setting your body on fire you felt conflicted as your arousal built inside you, it was as if your body was no longer your own, his dominant display managed to control your basic desires even when he was punishing you so thoughrly.

"Ow! Geralt st-sto-op im sorry" he scoffed as he continued his blistering assault on your cheeks before moving to your thighs. You shreiked as he left your sensitive skin deep red and throbbing. Kicking your feet out like a chastised child. He took it in his stride and tucked them under his calf pinning them down.

"Will you stop this bratty behaviour? next time you nearly get yourself killed i will spank you in camp bare do you hear me?" You cried louder flushing when your pussy clenched at the thought of being punished infront of the others.

"Yes yes stop!" You shouted out at him as he left harder swats against your already bruised bottom rocking you forward.

"No more tantrums and when your told to do something you will do it. No more arguing with yennefer either" you nodded weakly and stopped struggling succumbing to him discipline laying limp over him sobbing uncontrollably a mix of yelps sniffing and shaking breaths babbling that you'd be good and wont argue, promising anything if he stopped he huffed continuing untill your skin was a deep red from your knees to the top of your bottom pulling you skirt back down he rubbed your back.

"What you did today was stupid you could have easily died had i not heard you you would have,we wouldn't have even found your body y/n. There would have been nothing of you left." He said but there was somthing in his voice it almost sounded like fear. You sniffed as he rested a heavy hand on your stinging swollen bottom.

"And i mean it you ever do anything like this again and i wont care where we are or whos there youll get a bare assed spanking then and there."

You shrunk knowing full well he meant every word he slowly sat you up on his legs faceing you.

"This is the last time you leave camp alone,from now on you always have some one with you no matter what. When you get back you will aplogize for worrying them." You tucked your head under his chin nodding still sniffing back sobs as your ass and legs burned. He sighed leaning to collect his swords heaving them back into place before standing with you cradled in his arms.

"I can walk" you said meekly he tightend his hold inhaling your scent

"I know i want to hold you...i thought id lost you" Your heart broke alittle at the crack in his voice he must have been worried when he heard you screaming. It took nearly 20 minuets to get back you camp you used the time to collect yourself wiping your swollen eyes and tear stained eyes. Once you got to camp Geralt placed you by the fire you yelped as your bottom made contact with the ground. Ciri gave you a sympathetic smile knowing exactly how you felt. Yennefer rushed beside you pulling you to her in a desperate hug then leant you back holding you at arms legnth.

"What were you thinking? I dont believe you could be so stupid-" her rant was interupted by geralt

"Yenn iv dealt with it" you blushed at his implication as the others heard to she nodded giving you the once over noting your destressed apperance.

"Good." Was all she said then handed you some thick rags

"I got these for you, there for your well... you know.." you smiled a small smile

"Thank you." You took them tucking them in your pack. Geralt cleared his throat looking at you pointedly

"Im sorry i was a brat and for worriying you..all of you i didnt mean to i hope you can forgive me for being such a bitch." Yennefer chuckled and kissed your head

"Thats ok we all have bad days but its all forgiven" you nodded as fresh tears gatherd in your eyes latching onto her and she returned the hug before she pulled back kissing your cheek then sat behind you letting you lean against her you hissed as your bottom slid along the floor. Jaskier took note and blinked at you

"Did he hurt you? Your really quiet" You blushed and dropped your head embarassed Yennefer chuckled and Geralt sighed already knowing where this was headed. Ciri piped up understanding the situation.

"Jaskier leave it" he frowned watching as you kept shifting uncomfortably then gapped laughing.

"He spanked you" you cringed as the word seemed to make your ass throb even more he laughed.

"Shut up! You little shit" you leant over thumping him he let out a manly squeel and tried avoiding you then laughed again

"Ah ah behave yourself or geralt will spank you again for being naughty" you growled and launched yourself at him and you both began wrestling on the floor

"You sound jealous" you quipped as you landed on him pinning him.He yelped and crawled away from you you growled at him as yennefer pulled you to sit beside her , whimpering lightly as you sat on the hard floor you glared at him as he sat down smug snickering at you.

"Jaskier carry on and you'll join her" he stuttered at the witcher before scoffing

"Youd have to catch me first" Geralt smirked and tilted his head.

"That a challenge?" Jaskier bit back any remarks he had making you Ciri and Yennefer chuckle at the meek looking bard.

#geralt of rivia imagine #geralt imagine #geralt x yennefer x you #geralt x yennefer x reader #geralt x modern reader #geralt x y/n #witcher fanfiction #witcher fic #witcher imagine

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bella-spil · 4 years ago

Text

The Game

You and the rest of the Avengers play Cards Against Humanity.

Female reader.

Warnings: TONS of adult topics, TONS of cursing, a little bit of fluff (Don't read if you don't like adult topics)

Word count: 6.2k (sry that this is a longer one!)

A/N: sorry this took so long. I had it saved as a draft, but then my account logged out and I had to retype the whole thing. I hope you like it!!!!

@wednesday-add-em @angrythingstarlight if you wanna be tagged lmk.

"What game would that be, Parker?" Nat asked, suspicious.

"You'll find out if you chose to play," Peter declared.

As everyone else in the room started to wonder what "game" Peter was referring to, you Bucky and Sam were grinning at each other, knowing exactly what's gonna happen. You start daydreaming all the possibilities that might happen, from funny scenarios in the cards to people arguing about who won. They all seem great, but you knew it would be better once everyone would start playing.

"Actually," Wanda announced, getting up from her seat. "I'm pretty tired from the mission and the jet lag. I'm gonna call it a night."

"I am quite exhausted as well," Vision said, pushing his seat in. "I need a rest as well. Goodnight everyone."

"Congrats Y/N and Bucky!" Wanda shouted before she left the room, with Visions hand in hers.

"Wait, how can the android be tired?" Clint asked. Then everyone in the room knew what the two avengers were going to be doing tonight.

"WE KNOW YOU TWO ARE GOING TO FUCK TONIGHT!!!" Tony screamed at them. Wanda heard Tony and flipped him off, still walking to her room with Vision. Everyone at the table was laughing from Tonys antics, but you knew everyone might lose their voices by the end of tonight.

"So," Peter interrupted the laughing. "Is anyone else going to leave to fuck?"

All the avengers look at one another, seeing if anyone else would dare to get up from the table. Nobody made a move, except for Steve who just squirmed in his seat, knowing he wasnt going to leave for fucking. He wasn't the best in moments where there was something inappropriate involved, but he had a feeling that's what tonight would be full of. So he decided to man up and stand his ground.

"I dont think Im gonna fuck anybody tonight, unless Nat says so," Sam acknowledged. Nat rolled her eyes at him and kicked him underneath the table. Sam shifted in his seat, tears building up like a bomb about to explode. Nat smiled to herself, not letting anyone get suspicious of her in any way.

"Lets go kid," Tony said.

"Alright then," Peter smiled. "Everyone, follow me."

Everyone followed Peter and got up from the table. As they were following Peter, some of the avengers were whispering to one another. They had no clue about what was happening, which made everything more exciting. As they made their way to the living room, the game was already set up by Peter. The cards were arranged neatly onto the coffee table into piles with little tags on top of them so everyone knew what they were for. You patted Peter on the back to show how thankful you were for him.

He smiled back at you and whispered, "You owe me for this."

Then you glared at him and lit your hand on fire and shoved it in Peter's face.

"No, I don't think I do," you replied, smugly. Peter gulped and inches away from you, not wanting to have his ass kicked before the game even started. As you and Peter were bickering, the others behind you, except for Bucky, realized what the game was. You could hear sighs of realization behind you and internally grinned. You knew keeping them guessing would pay off in the long run.

"Oh, so we are playing this game?" Tony chuckled.

"Now I know why you and Parker were acting weird." Nat said, smiling at you.

"Told you you'd find out." you said.

"Ok are we playing in teams or going rogue?" Clint asked.

"In teams," Peter answered. "Me and y/n already came up with teams of two and team names."

"Oh god," Clint and Nat sigh while Tony is rolling his eyes. Sam snickers, thinking team names are for little kids but Steve is looking at the cards, not knowing what they are.

"Wait, guys. What is this game?" Steve questioned. Everyone rolls their eyes at him and sighs. Steve was very outdated, and even though he has been in modern times for about a decade now, he still had a ton of catching up to do.

"What?" Steve groaned. "Ive been frozen for 70 years. Give me a break!"

"Steve, you're not the only one that's a bit outdated. You have had a few more years to catch up then I have and I still know what this is." Bucky protested, earning a snicker from everyone else on the team while Steve rolled his eyes and lightly punched Bucky in the arm.

"Mr. Rogers," F.R.I.D.A.Y. chimed in. "Do you know the game Apples to Apples?"

"Yeah why?" Steve asked the A.I.

"Well, Cards Against Humanity is basically that game. The only difference is that Cards Against Humanity is for a more mature audience."

"That's a good way of putting it," Tony mocked.

"Ok thank you F.R.I.D.A.Y.," Steve said. "I'm all good now."

"C'mon guys what are the teams?" Clint asked, getting impatient.

"I hope I'm with Nat." Sam whispered, glancing at Nat once again. Sam winked at her, but she punched him in the arm. Nat liked using physical violence, but only went necessary, or if someone was annoying her, like Sam. Everyone chuckled, but then they drew their attention back to Peter, who was waiting to announce the teams.

"Ok, first is me and Mr. Stark." Peter announced. "We are the Student and Master."

"Kid, if we lose, I will take your suit away for a week." Tony declared as he high fived Peter. Peter gulped and took a seat with Tony around the table. Everyone else was standing up, waiting to hear their name be called.

"Then, we have Steve and Nat, the Spys." you said. Steve and Nat smiled at each other and sat down in front of Tony and Peter. Sam, however, was not impressed and his mouth was to the floor.

"Are you kidding me? Sam shrieked. "You put Star Spangled Banner with Nat?"

"The teams were already made," you shrugged. "If you wanted to be with her so badly, you should have made a request."

"I hate you," Sam retorted. "I hope i'm not with the Wiener Soldier over there."

"Shut it Pigeon," Bucky snapped. You rolled your eyes at the two of them, who were still throwing looks at each other like they were elementary school kids that got into an argument.

"Then me and Bucky are together," you said, taking a seat with the Winter Soldier on the right of Steve and Nat. Everyone made kissy noises and ooed at the two of you as you sat down.

"Wait you forgot the team name!" Clint remembered. You sighed before saying the embarrassing name.

"I didn't come up with the names, Peter did," you said, singling Peter out. "We are the Lovebirds." After you said the team name, everyone continued their antics of making kissing noises and everything else.

"Guess we are together, Clint," Sam realized, since Clint and himself were the last two people standing up. They took their seats on the left of Steve and Nat, making themselves directly across from you and Bucky. It seemed as if they did it on purpose, but you didn't care about that. You were waiting for their reaction to their team name.

"Y/N, what's their team name?" Nat asked. You and Bucky looked at each other, giggling like 5 year olds.

"Peter, would you like to do the honors?" you asked.

Peter sighed, knowing this would end up good, but continued anyway. "The Birdbrains." Everyone started howling in laughter. Sam and Clint looked at each other, then back at Peter, ready to pounce on him like lions.

"I'M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT!!!!" Sam shouted, running after Peter with Clint following suit. Due to his Spidey Sense, Peter was able to dodge the two of them and ran out of the room, followed by an angry Sam and Clint. Steve and Tony ran after them, trying to get the Birdbrains to come to their senses. You and Nat rolled your eyes at each other while Bucky was sitting there chucking.

"Ugh, men," Nat sighed.

You giggled as the five men took their seats. Sam was still annoyed, smoke coming out of his ears. Clint seemed ok, he looked like he enjoyed running after Peter. Peter was laughing, not trying to be rude, but he was trying to control himself.

"Im gonna kill you," Sam said.

"Sure Birdbrain," Peter smirks.

As everyone gets the laughter out of their systems before the game starts, each team picks seven white cards from the pile. Each team read their cards, giggling at some of them and having to hold in a cackle for others.

"Ok who is going to be the judges first?" Steve asked.

"I mean Y/N and Bucky," Nat responded as if it was obvious. "It's only fair that they go first."

"Ok then," you said, grabbing the first black card of the night. You grabbed the card and read it, and then you started laughing and showed it to Bucky. He laughed as well and the both of you were able to regain your senses to read the card.

"Bucky you wanna read it?" you ask, still smiling.

"Sure," Bucky replied. He cleared his throat before going on to read the card. "Fun tip! When your man asks you to go down on him, try surprising him with ______."

Everyone started to laugh again. But then, everyone's mode shifted from having fun to competition mode. Everyone in the Avengers hated losing anything and tonight was no exception. Each team was in deep discussion with their partners, deciding which card was the best to win the round. After a couple of minutes, each team put their cards in the middle for you and Bucky to read.

"Ok," Bucky cleared his throat again. "Fun tip! When your man asks you to go down on him, try surprising him with..." He stopped to read the first white card. "Drowning kids in the bathtub! Holy shit!" Everyone started laughing, including you. That card was very dark, and very funny.

"When your man asks you to go down on him, try surprising him with… an erection that lasts longer than 4 hours." Everyone lightly chuckled at this one, it wasn't as funny as the first card.

"Lastly, when your man asks you to go down on him, try surprising him with… explaining how viaginas work. Ok this one works for Steve 100%!" Everyone laughed and agreed with Bucky. Steve was smiling, not laughing. He was trying to not show how true that was but it wasn't working out that well for him.

Then you and Bucky turned to one another and discussed who won this round. You whispered for about less than a minute, since there was an obvious winner. Then you and Bucky turned around to the three teams and announced your decision.

"Drowning kids in the bathtub wins!" you declare. Then Peter and Tony cheer and high five each other.

"We did it!" Peter cheered.

"Got ya, suckers!" Tony bragged.

"Wait, how many black cards do you need to win?" Clint asked. You looked at Peter, who shrugged. It was a very good question, and you needed a minute to think about it.

"How about the first team with 10 black cards wins?" you ask. Everyone nodded and the game resumed.

"Ok, Peter, Tony, you judge." Bucky said.

Tony reached up to grab the card. As he read it, he kept snickering. When he finished, he showed Peter the card as he leaned into Peter's shoulder for support. Peter was chuckling as well and leaned on Tony's head. As far as you knew, Tony was very tough with Peter, but now, seeing them all cuddled up together laughing, it proved y9ou very wrong. It took you by surprise, but you loved how cute they were together. Tony was the father figure in Peter's life that he needed, and he was that figure for you as well.

"You wanna read it, Peter?" Tony asked.

"Sure," Peter said. "When I was tripping on acid, ______ turned into ________." Everyone chuckled at how ridiculous the card sounded and started to choose their cards for the round.

"Wait, how will you guys know which card goes first?" Steve asked.

"Put the first card on the top and the second one on the bottom." Peter replied. Steve gave him a thumbs up and continued talking with Nat.

As everyone was choosing their cards, you and Bucky were doing the exact same thing. But in the middle of it, Bucky called you "doll." Normally there's nothing wrong with this, it was something he called you since the two of you met. But Sam was in the room. And he heard it. After Bucky said it, Sam started cackling like a witch. He was rolled over on the floor, clutching to his stomach and tears covering his face. Everyone else looked up and wondered what in the world was so funny, since none of them heard Bucky's nickname for you. You didn't know why he was laughing, but Bucky knew the exact reason. He wasn't going to say anything to draw attention to himself or you. Instead he just gave a death stare at Sam, and nobody noticed.

"Partner, you good down there?" Clint asked, confused. Sam was still laughing as he got up from the floor.

"Yeah," Sam coughed. After he caught his breath, he saw Bucky glaring at him. He waved at Bucky, like he had no clue what he did. When your head was looking at the cards, he flipped Sam off and Sam stuck his tongue out and put his finger by his throat, signaling that Bucky would get it later. Bucky rolled his eyes and returned his attention back to you and the game.

After a couple minutes, three cards were placed in the middle, ready to be read by the Student and Master.

"Everyone hush!!! Tony scolded, and everyone in the room immediately shut up. "Thank you. Kid, you may read the first card."

"Thanks Mr. Stark," Peter said. "When I was tripping on acid, Danny DeVito turned into pixelated bukkake! Oh my god! What the FUCK?" Everyone was clutching on the remaining air that was left in their lungs. All of the teams were laughing to the point where faces were turning purple.

"What does that mean?" Steve quietly asked, not wanting a lecture about how pure he was. But everyone heard since the laughter was dying down, but it resumed once more after what Steve said. It took another couple of minutes for everyone to control themselves again.

"I'll explain later, Steve." Sam reassured. Steve rolled his eyes and let Tony and Peter continue.

"Ok, when I was tripping on acid, blowing my boyfriend so hard he shits turned into incest." Peter continued. He laughed at the end and everyone joined him.

"My turn, shut up!!" Tony barked. "Ahem. When I was tripping on acid, my sex life turned into..." Tony never finished reading the card. His eyes were glued to the last white card. It was like he did not comprehend what was on the card.

"Am I- am I reading this right?" he asked Peter. Peter took a look at the card and he snorted.

"Yeah.. yeah." Peter snickered. "You are reading that right, Mr. Stark."

"Ok I just wanted to make sure i'm not getting too old." Tony said. "When I was tripping on acid, my sex life turned into braiding three penises into a twizzler. Alright, who the fuck thinks this is ok?"

Everyone was cackling and laughing again. Tony was ranting on about how obscene the card was and how that would never work in real life, which was making it harder to stop laughing. Once Tony was finished complaining and asking F.R.I.D.A.Y. if the card was able to actually happen, the laugher subsided and Tony and Peter started deliberating. They took longer than you and Bucky, which made it seem as if it was a close round. Finally, Peter stood up and revealed the winning card.

"Before I announce the winning card, I have a question for Mr. Rogers." Peter announced.

"Sure, Peter. Whats up?" Steve asked.

"Did you understand what the last card meant?" Peter asked. Everyone chuckled lightly. Not that it wasn't funny. Everyone knew if they laughed too hard, they would have a hard time breathing.

Steve rolled his eyes and sighed dramatically before answering the question. "Yes. I understood that reference."

Bucky stood up and started applauding for Steve. He was joined by you, Nat, Tony and the Birdbrains. Steve stood up and took a bow, thanking everyone and waving like a celebrity.

"Thank god you did," Nat sighed in relief.

"Finally, you get something!" Bucky rejoiced.

"This was a close one but the sex life one wins for sure!" Peter said.

Clint and Sam got up again and started to cheer, high fiving and chest bumping. They even did some weird thing that was supposed to be a bird call, since they were the Birdbrains. To you, it sounded like a cat dying in an alleyway from food poisoning. Once they finished their bird call, the Birdbrains sat down and bragged about their first win of the night.

"Yeah yeah! Deal wit dat!" Sam yelled.

"Losers!" Clint cheered, making an "L" with his hand and putting it on his forehead.

"We will see who has the last laugh," Nat grunted.

"Birdbrains!" you chimed in.

"Shut it Lovebirds!" Sam shouted back at the two of you. He went to pick up the next black card. Bucky looked around the room, not knowing why he was blamed and not Nat. Nat smirked at Bucky and Bucky just rolled his eyes. You giggled while Bucky stuck the middle finger back at Sam, for the like the 100th time tonight.

Sam and Clint read the card and started to laugh again, but it wasn't a big one, just a chuckle.

"Hehe. Shut it Clint. I gotta read the card!" Sam scolded. Clint stopped laughing, but his face looked like it was about to explode any minute now as Sam started to read the card.

"White people like _____" Sam read. Everyone giggled and went back to their groups to decide which card would be the best. In a few minutes, each team was ready and placed their cards in the middle.

"We got this one Steve." Nat said.

"Yeah, Nat. Lets go!" Steve cheered as he high fived his partner.

"No, Spys," Tony sighed. "We do because we are the best. No questions needed to be asked. Right kid?"

"Yes sir!" Peter joined in. The two of them fist bumped and made faces at the Spys and Lovebirds.

"Oh be quiet," Bucky sighed. "Let the stupid Birdbrains read the fucking cards." You smiled as Bucky held his arm around you a little tighter than before. You knew Bucky wasn't the most patient person, and it seemed like the Birdbrains were taking as long as possible just to annoy your boyfriend. You knew you would win in the end though. And if you didn't, the Winter Soldier would kick their asses to their graves.

"Thank you. Ahem," Sam cleared his throat. "White people like jerking off into a pool of children's tears. Holy fuck." Everyone laughed at the card, just like all the others before it.

"That's my kind of humor. Continue Sam." Clint chuckled. You knew Clint had a very different sense of humor than most of the people at the Compound. You had become friends with him by understanding his jokes that nobody else understood. Even Peter was able to understand some of Clint humor, which was a shocker to everyone. Clint enjoyed having someone that understood him, even if it was for jokes about drowning kids.

"Next, white people like.." Sam never finished reading the card. He shoved the card in Clints face and walked out of the room to get a breath of fresh air. Clint looked at everyone to see if they knew why he walked out, but you and everyone else were just as lost. Then Clint looked at the card and had an "aha" moment.

"White people like a falcon with a cap on its head." Clint finished. Everyone knew the card wasn't funny. But since Sam's superhero name was "Falcon," it seemed so funny. Bucky was trying very hard not to laugh and so were Steve, Nat and Clint. Peter was about to laugh, but Tony was able to cover Peter's mouth in time. Tony raised his free hand to his mouth, making a "shush" motion. You were sitting there, smirking to yourself since you knew it wasn't the right time to laugh.

Then Sam came back into the room after a couple of minutes. He was clearly upset of something so stupid, which made it even harder not to laugh. Sam was staring at you and Bucky, thinking it was the two of you since Bucky and him were friends, but not really. Sam was eyeing everyone in the room like a hawk, trying to see if anyone had changed their facial expression or something else.

"Sam, you wanna read the last card?" Clint asked.

"No," Sam stated, bluntly. "You read it."

"White people like three dicks at the same time." Clint finished with a light chuckle, and all the other teams followed suit.

"Ok, drowning kids in the bathtub wins." Clint decided, without having to deliberate.

"Agreed." Sam said.

Bucky picked you up in the air and spun you around. He hugged you so tight, you had to tap him so you could breath. As you and Bucky bask in your victory, Sam is still looking at the Student and Master and the Spies. He was being a detective, looking for little details that might lead him to the culprits that put that card down.

"Who put the fucking card down?" Sam asked. All of the sudden, Tony and Peter start laughing out of control. Sam knew those two were the criminals in his crime. He took a deep breath, trying his best not to go over and take Peter down to the ground.

"Im gonna kill you." Sam growled.

"Save it Birdbrain," Nat told off. "First team to ten. Then you can kill them."

"You bet yo ass I will," Sam grunted.

~~~

The rest of the night carried on in a flash. The night was filled with laughter, smiles and cheers as each team won a round. When you started playing, it was around 8:30 pm. But now, it was 11:50 pm. Everyone was definitely tired, as everyone started to yawn and get bags underneath their eyes.

You and Bucky were doing very well together. You guys won a ton of rounds and always celebrated with Bucky hugging you and spinning you around the room. But you weren't tired. The adrenaline from the game was serving as a source of energy, and it was the same source for all the other teams too.

Peter and Tony were doing very well too. They won a couple rounds as well and they always high fived when they won. But whenever they lost, Tony threatened Peter, saying he would take away his suit and suspend him from being an Avenger. And as the night progressed, you and everyone kept forgetting the score for your teams. So Tony asked F.R.I.D.A.Y. to keep track of the score for the rest of the night. And she did, very well.

Sam and Clint were very competitive and sometimes it served in their favor. They won a few like you and Bucky and Peter and Tony. Clint was yawning by 9:50, he wasn't used to staying up late, but he was having fun nonetheless. Sam, however, was full of energy, matching your level. He grabbed tons and tons of candy, ice cream and other junk food as the night progressed, serving as a food and energy source for all of the teams. Sam ate so much in fact that he got a sugar high at about 10:00 pm, but it wore off a few minutes later.

Steve and Nat were doing good,but not as well and you and Bucky. They won a few rounds, sure, but not as many as they would like. Nat was pretty calm, but when Sam was "high" he was trying to be smooth and get Nat to go out with him. She hit him repeatedly, and she smiled with gusto as she did, which made you laugh. Steve to your surprise, was getting a little worked up. He sighed in annoyance whenever they lost a round, and roared in happiness whenever they won.

~~~

"Ok, what's the score F.R.I.D.A.Y.?" Nat asked.

"The score for the Lovebirds is nine," F.R.I.D.A.Y. recited. "The Spies have seven. The Student and Master have nine as well. And finally, the Birdbrains have nine. Is that all Mrs. Romanoff?"

"Your good, thanks F.R.I.D.A.Y." Nat thanked.

"Ok since you guys have nine each, me and Nat will judge this last round." Steve said. "This is it, the last one. Winner takes all!"

As Steve finished his speech, Nat rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath as she went to grab the final black card.. You knew Bucky had superb hearing, so you leaned to ask him what she said.

"Buck, what did she say?" you asked, quietly.

"She was just saying something about how Steve has a speech for every little thing." Bucky whispered. You giggled under your breath.

As Nat read the card, she showed it to Steve, who started to giggle like a five year old.

"Steve, this isn't that funny," Nat groaned.

"Just read the card," Steve sighed as he regained control of his breathing.

"Ugh." Nat sighed. "Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on _____." Everyone chuckled at the card and turned to their partners for the last time.

"Kid, this is it," Tony said.

"Yep," Peter said.

"We gotta go big or go home." Tony said. Then, Tony and Peter looked through the cards and finally, they had their eyes set on their winning card.

"This, my student, is gold," Tony remarked. "No, no. Scratch that. It's the diamond in the rough."

"Do you know the movie Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?" Peter asked.

"Yeah why?"

"Well, this card is like our golden ticket to victory Mr. Stark." Peter said.

"I don't want another pop culture reference out of you for the rest of the night. You understand?" Tony scolded. Peter gulped as Tony placed their card in the middle of the table.

"Clint?" Sam asked.

"Sam?" Clint asked.

"This is it." Sam said.

"This is it." Clint said. "We gotta give 'em the money."

"Give em the money!"

"We gotta win."

"We have to show those little shits who the fucking bosses are." Sam declared.

"Yes sir," Clint agreed. As the Birdbrains were chanting, boosting their confidence, they interrupted Bucky's train of thought, and yours as well. To you, they sounded like the football teams in the locker room. When the coach is giving the team a pep talk during the halftime show in the Superbowl, boosting the teams confidence. You were giggling to yourself as you heard them, and Bucky caught on. As you looked back at him, you saw a glimmer in his heavenly, blue eyes, filled with mischief. He had his signature smirk, his one for trouble on as well.

"Doll, watch this," he whispered. He looked over at Sam and Clint, and you waited to see what he would do next.

"YEAH BIRDBRAINS! PREACH!!!" he shouted, clapping his hands and cheering them on, mocking them.

Sam and Clint immediately stop and glare at Bucky, who is smirking at them and batting his eyelashes at them, while you are cuddled up into his shoulder laughing at the Winter Soldiers antics.

"SHUT IT LOVEBIRDS!!!" Sam and Clint clap back.

"Ok, before we were so RUDELY interrupted," Sam grunted.

"Very RUDELY," Clint agreed.

"Do you agree that this one is the winner?" Sam asked. Clint looked at the card that Sam was referring to and nodded his head. Then Sam took the card and placed it in the middle. You and Bucky were the team that everyone was waiting for.

"Ok doll," Bucky said. "Don't worry. We got this in the bag."

"Yeah we got this." you agreed, smiling at your boyfriend.

Bucky looked at the other teams and pointed at them while they were waiting for you guys. "They don't know who they are dealing with. They are messing with the fucking Lovebirds and they have made a BIG fucking mistake."

"Yeah we got this. Also.." you said slyly, biting your lip at Bucky, putting your hand in his hair and leaning into his ear so only he could hear. "If we do win.. We can have some fun later, if you know what I mean."

When you pulled away, looking back at the cards, you looked at Bucky through the corner of your eyes. His eyes bulged open and he looked at you, smirking and biting his bottom lip.

"Oh doll," he groaned, his voice deeper and as smooth as chocolate.

"This card looks good right?" you asked, your tone completely changed from full of lust to innocence. Bucky kept staring at you and smiled at you. He always had a hard time believing he was dating you, but tonight, he realized he wanted you till the day he died.

"Yeah, you do." he blushed. You giggled at him and gave him a peck on the cheek before you put your card into the middle.

"Ok everyone ready?" Steve asked, grabbing the cards from the table. Everyone nodded, nerves were bouncing off the walls for all the teams.

"First card." Steve announced. "Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on..." He looked at the card and snickered, making sure his eyes weren't play tricks on him. "I'm high on anal beads." The room was roaring with laughter as Steve blushed after reading the card. It took everyone about 10 minutes to calm down and let the Spies read the next card.

"That's method." Tony sighed.

"That's fucked up," Nat coughed.

"That's kinky as fuck!" Sam exclaimed.

"Next: Kids, I dont need drugs to get high," Nat read. "I'm high on selling crack to children." Nat's voice cracked with shock as she finished reading the card in horror. Everyone cracked up even more.

"That's sick!" Clint said.

"Twisted!" Peter agreed.

"Ok whoever put that card down has the balls and I fucking live for it." you smiled, still laughing.

"What the hell?" Bucky sighed, putting his head in his metal hand, trying to process what Nat read.

"Then, last but not least, Nat will you do the honors?" Steve asked.

"It would be my honor," Nat grinned. Before she started reading, she cleared her throat, overexagrating a little bit, which caused everyone to chuckle. "Kids, I don't need drugs to get high. I'm high on… what the fuck?" Nat looked at the card she had to read and started cackling like a witch.

"Nat, you ok over there?" you asked.

"Yeah Im fine." Nat chuckled. "I'm high on a good sniff." Everyone in the room was soon cackling like Nat. And you sounded like witches. You wondered how Wanda and Vision were "sleeping" with all the noise you guys were making. After everyone calmed down, Steve wasn't out of breath like everyone else.

"Nat, that means what I think it means right?" Steve asked quietly.

"What do you think it means Steve?" Nat sighed. Steve leaned into her ear and whispered what he thought it was. You asked Bucky if he could hear what he said, but your boyfriend shook his head. After Steve finished telling Nat, she nodded her head and rolled her eyes at her stupid partner.

"Yes Steve." Nat groaned. "That's what 'a good sniff' means, you idiot."

"Thought you would have gotten that, pal," Bucky mocked.

"I did, I just wanted to make sure what I thought was correct." Steve stated.

"Steve, how do you not understand anything?" Bucky asked.

"Bucky, I thought you always fucked the girls on the first date in the forties. Did you yet?" Steve asked, trying to come back at Bucky. But it didn't really make sense because you were still a virgin. Tony rolled his eyes in the corner and you sighed.

"Did you fuck a girl yet?" Bucky snapped.

"Steve, do we have a winner?" Nat interrupted, stopping the old men from bickering any longer.

"No, I have no clue," Steve answered. "This was a close round. Do you want to decide somewhere else, so they don't hear? This might take a while."

"Yeah, lets go to the bathroom," Nat said. "Take the cards with you." Steve followed Nat, but Sam wasn't going to let Nat leave so quickly.

"Dont fuck him Nat!!!" Sam pleaded, shouting as loud as he could. "He will lose his powers!" Steve turned his back to face Sam, who was smiling back at him. Steve rolled his eyes and followed Nat, and as he walked down the hall, he flipped Sam off. Nat did as well.

You, Peter and Tony were laughing your asses off, laughing at Steve and Nat as they were in the bathroom. Clint was on his phone, texting his wife.

Meanwhile, Sam and Bucky were making fun of Steve. You heard them saying how much trouble Steve would be having if he was actually fucking Nat. They were saying how Nat would be the dominant one and Steve would be like a ragdoll. You were listening to Sam and Bucky more then Tony and Peter, since what Bucky and Sam were talking about interested you way more.

After about 10 minutes or so, Steve and Nat came out of the bathroom. You, Sam and Bucky were eyeing them very closely, seeing if their hair was messed up, if their clothes were wrinkled, if they had hickeys, but there were no signs of physical contact. Sam, however, wasn't letting up.

"I hope you didn't give him a quickie," Sam mocked.

"Fuck off, Birdbrain," Nat scoffed. "Steve, do you want to announce the winning team?"

"Sure," Steve nodded. "Drumroll, please."

Everyone patted their legs, making a drumroll noise. But Tony just waved his hand for everyone to stop.

"Guys stop, just stop." Tony commanded. "We have an A.I. for a reason. F.R.I.D.A.Y., drumroll." F.R.I.D.A.Y. followed her orders and played a drumroll.

"The winning card is….." Steve announced. "A GOOD SNIFF!!!" You and Bucky erupted from your seats like a volcano. Your hair started to glow and you floated in the air for a second. Everyone saw you and thought you looked like a living candle. Bucky hugged you and spun you around the room in his arms. Bucky kissed you and you kissed him back. Not a makeout, but just a long kiss, filled with passion and love.

Sam and Clint got pissed that they didn't win, but they clapped for you, very slowly. Peter clapped for you and cheered, but Tony just sighed and made gagging noises when he saw you kissing. Nat was smiling at the two of you, and so was Steve. They looked like proud parents, smiling in approval of how happy you and Bucky were.

"YES!! We won!!" Bucky shouted.

"Told ya we would!" You cheered. "Take that, Birdbrains!"

"Yeah, yeah good job. I'm going to bed." Tony groaned and headed up to the elevator, which led him to his room which was on the top floor. You sighed and said goodnight anyways.

"I should call it a night," Clint said.

"Me too. See ya tomorrow, lovebirds!" Nat said. You and Bucky waved goodbye as the two of them headed to their rooms.

"Congratulations guys. See ya tomorrow!" Steve said.

"They was cheatin." Sam bickered.

"Cmon birdbrain, lets go," Steve sighed. Sam was bickering with Steve all the way to their rooms, and as they got further away, you could still hear them, which made you laugh. The only people left in the room were you Bucky and Peter.

"I'm so happy that it worked," Peter said. "Congrats by the way!"

"Thanks Peter! I had so much fun!" you smiled.

"Yeah, it was great," Bucky agreed. "I owe ya big time, Spiderling."

"Oh, thanks grandpa." Peter grinned. "You have no idea what you owe me." Then you guys cleaned up the remaining cards and headed back to your rooms. Peter said goodnight to the two of you and you and the Winter Soldier headed to his room.

"When we get back to my room," Bucky said as you were walking. "We earn our reward."

#avengers #marvel #fanfic #fandom #peter parker #natasha romanoff #sam wilson #bucky x reader #bucky fanfic #bucky fucking barnes #bucky barnes #tony stank #tony stark #steve rogers #clint barton #friday #cards against humanity

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semiconducting · 4 years ago

Text

just reflecting on some personal growth stuff from last year !

im actually. genuinely okay. like i think im starting this year feeling okay! which is atypical.

i think i can attribute it to the enormous amount of work id put into myself over the past year...i remember one year ago being extraordinarily depressed and really just. high strung? incredibly anxious but exhausted. and i fell down a descent slowly from not eating, to getting really irritable and not handling conflicts with friends well, to actively self harming again, to the point where i remembered sitting in a coffee shop with one of my friends and saying out loud that i need to go to therapy. and that i was going to talk to a mutual friend of ours about how the therapy services on campus are. which was a huge step for me! ive always had trust issues with therapy services since i was 12 for reasons i wont go into, but im sure you can gather the point of.

and then, literally the next day after saying that, got news about campus shutting down because of the virus.

and i made all of the effort possible to reach out to my friends and get things figured out to weather the storm because i KNEW shit was going to get bad if i didnt. but only one of my friends was really keeping up, and thats because he and i do homework together so we were already in a rhythm of talking every single week no matter what. and thats not to say that im ungrateful for him or the fact that even still he was there for me while i was going through hell, i have this thing about Not Putting All My Problems On And Confiding In One Person And One Person Only. so i withdrew, i stopped talking to everyone, i stopped logging into my classes, i didnt do any homework, i didnt lead my workshops, didnt hold office hours...i was just wallowing in my own misery

and i made plans to kill myself. and thats like, i mean i could say that several dozen times over the course of a year since i was like 12, but i mean a legitimate walkthrough plan. had my hiking bag packed with everything i was going to use, decided where i was going to, and was going to prep myself for it. wrote drafts and drafts of suicide notes until i decided just leaving the contact info of people who needed to know asap was all i was going to leave. in addition to sticky notes on some stuff in my room for what needed to be returned to who, or if something should go to someone in particular...

and i acted as normally as i could around my housemates. attributed my not leaving my room much to being busy with classes. i have a rule to myself to always sleep at least one night before killing myself because if im really serious about going through with it it can always wait one day. this time i decided i was going to clean my room and leave it as pristine as possible. the last thing i had to do was a load of laundry, and then i was going to do it.

and then someone from campus showed up at my door. because one of my professors filed a report and i hadnt responded to any of the emails id received checking in on me.

so i readjusted. caught up on my schoolwork, just barely finished the semester and definitely didnt do it strong or well (god bless the pass/fail option bc of covid LOL), but i did it nonetheless. went home, started my internship, had a miserably mundane summer.

i grew bitter and apathetic. i was angry at my friends for not being responsive when i reached out to them to talk or hang out or do anything. i got tired of dealing with it. i was tired of feeling alone and like no one gave a shit about me except for when it was convenient for them. i decided that i wasnt going to deal with people who werent willing to put any effort into me, so i stopped talking to everyone and kept up with people who were willing to reach out after the fact.

it’s definitely not the best approach. it’s really unforgiving and it doesn’t give people a lot of benefit of the doubt, but i think it was necessary in some respect. i didn’t have any criteria for how people needed to reach out, or how long after, or whatever, just that they did. really needed people in my life who are willing to communicate with me. i was honest with how i was feeling and why i did things if they did, apologized for the shitty approach, thanked them for still being willing to talk to me, and worked out the best way for both of us to keep things going.

over the months i dont think i really regret the decision, because it’s been a weight off my shoulders. i feel a lot better. i’m far more okay with where i stand in all of my friends’ lives, even if that’s not as a priority and even if that’s as just someone to talk to and catch up with like a couple times a year. it took a bit for it to pay off but it’s nice to take a look at people i was putting far too much work into and upon reflection realizing that they only interacted with me when they needed something from me, and not for me as a person. i think there are still people where there are loose ends and i think i may try reaching out myself to tie those up at some point, whenever i have the energy and clarity of mind for it. but i guess at the end of the day i just decided that people who weren’t willing to communicate weren’t worth the time. i’m okay if that communication means i need to be the one to initiate conversations even! i just need to know that.

but yeah. i came back to ny and started the semester totally apathetic and angry. i was so fucking depressed and bored with everything even if i was keeping myself incredibly busy. the only thing that i found rewarding (and what was just barely keeping me going) was leading my workshop for the intro optics class.

and then a friend -- the same friend i was at the coffee shop with -- reached out to catch up. and i was honestly really bitter and angry with him and was prepping myself to start listing out issues that i hadnt been able to address with him beforehand (side note, while telling friends the issues you have with them is important, listing shit out all at once is hardly ever a good approach especially without warning LOL) but ended up...just having a calming and comfortable conversation about what was going on in our lives since we last saw each other.

n later that day i ended up reaching out to an old friend that i had been meaning to catch up with because we fell out of contact, but had just barely been trying to start talking again in the months before this but had kept missing opportunities to properly converse. but we talked again, and we set up a day to hike and catch up.

and he comes to my house and picks me up. and i get in his car. and its like, holy shit, its been almost a year since ive seen you. and we hugged. and just started to catch each other up on the mess that had been our lives since we’d actively been in contact. we hiked, he told me about the books he wanted to write, we talked about people we knew, we talked about politics, we talked about school, we talked about life, and it was just as comfortable as if not a day had passed...even though it was obvious that he and i were both changed people over the past year. nothing about our friendship was any different though.

we resolved to hanging out with each other every week. decided we both needed the interaction, appreciated having each other around, and had a nice overlap of free time in the week that worked well. friday nights unless otherwise specified.

it was totally unexpected. he’d always been a great friend to me, but i never expected us to get as close as we did. neither did he. he’s probably the first person in my life (or at least in a very long time, and certainly the only person at the time) that i’d been so comfortable with that i practically had no boundaries around. none that needed to be addressed, anyway, because the only possible ones to throw up wouldn’t even come up (but of course, i constantly reassured that as soon as anything came up i would let him know because early on he kept asking sjhdkjfh).

he became something for me to look forward to in the week. towards the beginning he was a shoulder to lean on when i needed it and was willing to listen to things i hadn’t been able to tell anyone out loud. and he confided in me as well. it was comfortable. it was safe. it was a level of trust with vulnerability that i’d never shown anyone else.

but it wasnt even just that! it was fun! hes so fun. we could talk about everything and nothing, and hes one of the only people where i feel like i have to keep up with him in conversation instead of the other way around. we’d jump from topic to topic so much faster than either of us could think and it was all always so interesting. littered with humour that was just dumb and simple. i felt comfortable just being an idiot with him. i felt like i had nothing to prove.

for the past few years ive held to the sentiment that i like to hang around with people that make me a better person. but somehow, with him, its not that i felt like he made me a better person, but that he made me more myself. he saw who i was without any kind of fronts. and i always was afraid to show anyone that me because i always assumed that they would be depressing, loathsome, bitter, angry, and vicious.

but....i’m not. i learned that i’m incredibly loving. that i’d do fuckin anything to for my friends, but always in a way that was healthy and rewarding for both of us. i’m very light-hearted and my sense of humour is so stupid, but also very analytical and thoughtful. just a bit judgmental and pretentious, but always for things that people dont expect. totally open minded in discussions. an avid explorer, and a bit of a thrillseeker. and so, so, so affectionate.

i realized im. not as horrible as ive always made myself out to be. i accepted that i didnt need to punish myself for things beyond my control. i realized that i could believe people when they tell me that they enjoy my company, or appreciate things i do for them, or that they think i’m a worthwhile person to keep around.

its not that i dont have my flaws, its not that there arent things that i have to work on still. but maybe, at my core, i’m not actually motivated by spite, i’m not actually a hopeless pessimist, and that i’m not...broken. i’m not some secretly irredeemable monster.

and for a period of time i’ve been in a place where i could say i was genuinely...happy! and i don’t think i’ve ever been able to say that. i’ve certainly been made happy by doing things with friends in the past, i’ve been through periods where i’ve been okay with where i am at in life, but ever since i was like 12 (but probably even before that) i’d never been able to say that i was happy. it’s not that i wasn’t stressed, it’s not that things in my life were all going perfectly....but they didn’t define my mood. they didn’t define my view of myself. school, despite being the primary focus of my life, wasn’t dictating how i was feeling. even when things were agonizing and depressing because of school, i was still okay. i was incredibly stable.

and i owe that all to him being there for me. and hardly any of these things were anything that he was really directly responsible for, like its not that he sat there and just constantly showered me in reassurance and praise or anything that changed how i view myself...it was just having his company. it was just being able to sit there and listen to him go on about some totally random thing that he was exceptionally knowledgeable about. it was exploring caves and climbing hills. it was cooking together. it was talking about science. it was talking about love. it was talking about music. it was just having a consistent presence in my life, someone that treated me like a priority but never at the expense of himself, and someone i didn’t have to walk on any kind of eggshells around. it was someone who trusted me and respected me not by anything id done to warrant it, but just because of who i was.

it was a reminder that i can take care of my own problems, that i just need to be a good presence in someone’s life and for them to be a good presence in mine.

but also that i can accept help from people who genuinely want to offer it! and that that help doesnt always have to be direct. that sometimes helping me means i get to do something nice for someone else LOL

it was everything i ever needed and i wasnt even looking for it. he meant the world to me and i was so, so thankful for the circumstances that led us here because i was so happy to have him in my life again. i was happy that we were able to get closer because we’d only been able to interact in professional environments before.

and then i realized i was in love. and i had a sexuality crisis. but i didn’t recognize it until i fell hard because it was a different kind of love than i’ve felt for anyone before. it was intense but entirely too comfortable. but i knew that i cared about him, and that he cared about me, and that i really didn’t need anything about our friendship to change but that it had potential to be something even greater than it was.

and i resolved to tell him about it...until he told me first. and that moment was, as cheesey as it sounds, nothing less than magical. we were both so happy and giggly and it was so sweet and warm and i dont know if im ever going to be able to recreate that feeling because it was just so particular, so specific to being something between me and him. its not that i cant love anyone else as strongly or be as happy as i was necessarily, but it’ll never be that same kind of feeling.

but things happened. things got complicated. i think he panicked. and then things that happened just felt so dirty and hollow and dark. he hurt me really, really, really badly, and it managed to happen in the span of four days.

and i’ve spent the last <2 weeks dealing with it. i think he’s dealing with it in his own ways, but realistically i don’t know how because i havent seen him since christmas eve, and we were both definitely not being completely genuine that day. was at his house for a small family party and he and i were the only ones who knew what happened. it was too soon to have healed from it any, but we couldnt exactly be honest about it then either.

and im doing better. im genuinely okay now. and, interestingly, i think i owe it to the past few months of hanging out with him and how ive been able to come to terms with a lot of things about myself. ive been able to show myself compassion. its really ironic.

its a situation where i was desperately trying to throw blame onto myself for, because if i could then i could punish myself for it and use it to fuel that deep rooted self hatred and then i could fix it, because i’d be the one responsible for fixing it. but, and i’ve talked to quite a few friends about it trying to figure out who to confide in about it, everyone who knows about it insists that i cant blame myself for it. theres not a thing about the situation that i can blame myself for. and its so fucking weird, because i cant bring myself to fully blame him for it either, just because it was so ABSURDLY out of character that it doesnt feel like it was anything he could have done to me. it was a boundary that i wasnt ever supposed to worry about him crossing, because he’s just not that kind of person.

and it’s the type of situation that you’re supposed to totally be willing to cut someone off for but...i can’t. he’s genuinely remorseful and i think he doesn’t really know how to deal with it either. and despite it being a massive fuck up its still like...the first fuck up in our friendship from either of us. and i’m willing to see this through. i think it’s salvageable, even if it’ll never be the same as it was. i have faith in our friendship. i think we can make it work.

but no matter what happens. i owe him more than i’ll ever be able to repay him for. and i’ll never, ever be able to hate him because of that. i’m in a much, much better place because of him and for that i’ll always be thankful.

#shut up mega #this ended up being longer and more in depth abt the earlier half of the year than i meant it LOL #a summary of my 2020 i spose #also there's some kinda detailed talk of #suicide ment -#self harm ment -#IM CRYING AFTER WRITING THIS OUT LMAOOOO

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loudlypanickinginvenezolano · 4 years ago

Text

[WIP] Dolled up. (I think.) Half of first chapter.

TW: Violence (They are figthing.) Dealing with injuries. Wounds. Blood. No medical experience so, all of this could be very well absolutely wrong and very worthy of cringe. Mention of death. Body horror? I think? There is a very ugly looking monster. And I wrote how I imagined them to look, so...

The blackened earth was smoking, the greyish thing going high to the darkened sky. Rubble was everywhere, disaster and chaos claiming what once seemed to be a very calm forest. Animals carcass lithered the burned ground, and Shadow worried for a while that maybe there wasn’t going to be anything growing in a very long time, and seeing how far the damage extended, it really was concerning.

Or, maybe not.

Strange things happening in Mobius was something Shadow was becoming used to. Things that should not happen were the normal here. People, Mobians and Humans for equal, had learned to stop questioning the around.

If it wasn’t something dangerous, then let it be.

He still hadn’t get the hang of it. But.

Well.

He gazed softly at the half burned bunnies and half dead squirrels (and that one bear.) praying softly in a low voice for them and the destroyed natural bunch of flowers and grass that were...well, everywhere. The smell of burning wood and fallen trees marked the path for him to walk, were the fight sounds have already subsided. Looking over himself, and deciding that he wasn’t that bad as if for not being able to continue, he quickly stood up, shaking softly as he ran to get rid of annoying dirt, fallen quills, hairs, rocks, and well, dried (And not so dried.) blood.

He just hoped he wasn’t going to find bugs crawling on him later on.

What remained of the big bio mechanical beast he and his companion had been battling was on the ground. All three of them had fallen at great heights, a stronger that he expected punch with long claws making him slip and fall before they stopped. It had hurt, a lot, more because they had been battling for quite the while, and he got the hit directly in already bruised areas. He had been dizzy, and unable to stand up or answer Sonic scream asking if he was okay.

There may be a few broken bones or strained, sprained muscles. A few burned patches, no doubt. Scratch’s, cuts, and bruises that were going to get swollen and hurt like a bitch.

He didn’t think there was internal bleeding? But maybe it was too soon to say?

Sticks broke under his skates, flowers and thick logs that have been throw around as spectators of the battle. The beast laid unmoving, debris all around. He could see a destroyed house not very far, an un-salvable fence and what could be a garden. He could hear some animals screaming near, and the desperate chirping of new baby birds whose parents had fled during the altercate.

Feeling guilty, he made a mental note to try and search for them, see who could be saved and what needed to be put out of its misery.

— Shadow! — He heard Sonic screech, and quickly wiped around, trying to find from where the blue menace was screaming. He didn`t find him, but he, however, was found indeed.

Just that not by a very tired looking blue cute hedgehog, but by a miserable looking thing that tried to call itself a cyborg. The beast, no doubt an hybrid made in an experimental laboratory seemed to have lost itself in pain, and its feral stare cut sharply to unfocused hazy red eyes.

Fuck.

He dodged the attack with a pant, his body complaining at the every move. It seemed it had finally snapped, as it didn’t mind anymore the pain it felt. It barely growled at him when with a good punch, he managed to take off one of its various mechanical arms.

There was nothing under it, and the view evidently made Shadow feel very uneasy and uncomfortable, because at least there, there should be something. Uneasy enough to make him falter just a bit, and almost get his nose bitten. He got it licked, though.

Was he being mocked?

Was he a joke to Cyborg-thingy?

Falling down hard on his already hurting tail, he barely reacted in time to block its big maw with his skates, clawed hands digging on the soil beneath him as if to not get pushed around. He flexioned, bringing his knees to his chest in the most unexpected moment, making it lose balance for a second.

The second he needed to yank and make it fall forward hard, almost flying over his head.

Shadow felt like screaming, the agony on his body and that twist he did that pulled hard on already sensitive muscles was a lot to deal with, more with his old, still healing, wounds. He lifted his head from the ground, trying to look out for Sonic, wondering where the fuck was his ally. He found him battling with those annoying smoll winged beasts a good few meters apart from where he was, smile all but gone and seriously attacking those bitches.

He made a face, because Shadow barely could fight them without getting nightmares or feeling shivers running down his spine, not that, well, anyone knew. Those things creeped him out. Like. Really. Maybe it was how crazy their eyes looked? How...red? The scars and metal plates peppered over their bodies? The scary looking stiches on mismatched skin? The dark-feeling chaos energy they had?

His stomach lurched just thinking about them.

— Disgusting. — He muttered. They really made him nervous and tense.

"When something was so annoying, it was almost pleasant seeing them disappear or die." It just...He couldn’t get that feeling completely when battling them. Even so.

Erm.

Mh, Wasn`t Sonic being a tad too much on them? He seemed almost...angry?

Maybe he should follow his example. He just needed...5 more seconds. You know. Catch his breath. Swallow back his liver. Pray it goes to where it belong.

Cry?

The usual.

A loud creaking noise made him open his eyes abruptly, and he looked back at his own beast.

Did this dude didn’t know when to give up?

Or how to die?

He rolled out of the way, avoiding a tree being send flying his way. It crashed, hard, close the chaotic house.

Shadow could barely spare it a thought, though. Not when it sprinted towards Sonic, apparently deciding that Shadow was too much of a rough cookie and needed to try his luck somewhere else.

— Nope! — He muttered, standing up as well with a big effort. — Idiot! Wa-Watch out! — He screamed to his distracted rival. Or tried to. He could barely talk. He was becoming dizzy once again.

This was. Concerning. Had he got his head--? Forget it. Of course he did.

Skating the distance between them, he outran the beast, breathing hard, and started trying to attack it, or distract it. He stabbed, punched, pulled, heck, even gave a bite, but the thing ignored him, as if Shadow were nothing but a mere bug. Sonic had long noticed them, but the flying things didn’t left him a chance to go away. They clipped his skin, and avoided his spins. Didn’t reacted to his quills, and clawed at him, don’t letting him leave.

They were so many, it almost looked like a private tornado. Every time Sonic got one down, two more would pop out of nowhere and take its place. They were flying around him, circling, going high and then diving in attack. In made it hard to see Sonic.

Clinging hard to a bit of fur, Shadow managed to climb it. It started to pay him more attention, but didn’t change his direction, adamant in attacking Sonic. Unsteadily, he made his way and managed to make a deep cut on its neck. Digging his claws, he tried to break it. Make it quickly, and stop its pain.

Just end it. Give it peace.

The beast let out a big roar, and his shaking almost threw him at the ground before honestly scared green eyes. A few flying things started to attack him, making it harder to stay put. He really didn’t know if the blood he was seeing mating the beast fur was his, its, or from them.

Because he was kicking their asses as well, yes sir.

He squeezed harder, and the beast tripped and twisted with a yowl. Shadow had to jump before he got crushed beneath it, tackling Sonic on his way, as well, getting both of them out of the way of the beast by rolling on the ground…and well… rocks and branches.

One word.

Ouch.

No good. Really.

No good.

The winged ones flew all around them, in a very messy and menacing mayhem. A lot of them were surrounding The beast, clinging and... Were they taking off with it?

Their wings were beating them, flashes of green, brown, red, metal grey and blue all around. Even the sky above was darkened because of them. They clipped Sonic hands, arms, face, Shadows ears, back. Their screeching was disorienting, painful on sensitive hedgehog hearing.

This time it was Shadow who got pushed to the ground, his whines of agony washed out for all the noise, Sonic rolling them out of the way of a big, big, Winged One. He got a nasty cut (With a sting powerful enough to steal a high yelp of pain) on his side thanks to it, and a push forceful enough to throw him off Shadow and make them roll a bit. Two of them flew way to low, making both of them duck their heads and, in consequence, leaving them unable to see the next attack before too late.

Sharp claws pierced the skin on Shadow back, making him actually scream thanks to the excruciating pain and scaring the ever loving shit out of Sonic, who immediately reached out. Shadow clung to Sonic arms when his body was lifted from the ground. Sonic yelped as well, panic flowing through his body and mind as his upper part was lifted too and couldn’t find purchase with his shoes for 2 petrifying seconds. They weren’t taking Shadow from him.

They couldn’t.

Sonic refused. ___ Hi? Im sorry if this seems like too much, but im proud of how this is coming out, so ! Yes. I just dont know if I should publish only Tumblr.

#that thing about people deciding in writing during quarantine? Yes. Basically #quarantine fic #Sonic the hedgehog #shadow the hedgehog #Sonadow #Just not yet #Sonic is actually pining hard #Tropes #anger born out of worry #my writing

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sweets-fanfics · 5 years ago

Text

Homecoming 12

Title: Spaghetti?

Wordcount: 4183 (I dont feel sorry at all)

Warnings: Fluff, glorious suger teeth rotting fluff (at the end)

Tag: @rollyjogerjones

AN: Im not sorry I wrote alot. There was too much I wanted to put.

___________________

When you woke up the next morning Arthur wasn’t asleep next to you. You look around a bit confused. You put your feet over the edge which accidentally lands on a sleeping Bear as he’s stretched out across the floor. You scratch his belly with your foot before stepping over him to get up.

You slowly begin to wake up more as you slip on your jeans and boots. You’re taking your hair out of the braid it was in when you step out of the tent in practically into Abigail. “Good Mornin’ Y/N, is Jack hidin’ in there?”

“No, he’s isn’t I’m sorry Miss Roberts.”

She waves you off trying to not look worried, “I’m sure it’s nothin’ he probably just got distracted.

She starts to wander away still calling for him, “I’ll check down by the river for you.” You call to her and head down by all the wood that had been washed to shore. “Jack!” You yell out. A small head pops out from behind a log.

“I’m right here, Auntie Y/N.” He waves and grins.

“Jack, your mother is worried sick about.” You say as you lean over to see what he’s doing. “What mess are you makin’?” You ask with a smile.

“I found a lizard.” He points to the underside of the log, “I’m tryin’ to catch it to show Momma.”

“I’m not entirely sure how she’d feel about a lizard…” You didn’t seem to happy to see one either but curiosity got the best of you and you grabbed a stick to help. “Maybe we can show Henry.”

“You think he likes bug?” Jack asks.

“He used to chase me with them when we were your age.” You grin at him, “It was before I became the tough one.”

“Whoa… I thought he only liked Stars.”

“Well… he does like them stars but I think all boys like bugs,” Jack looks at you surprised before looking again.

As the two of you look you begin to hear Bear growl somewhere behind you. You look around and see him growling into a bush, “Bear. Come here, are you growling at a rabbit again?”

That’s when you hear the sounds of two guns clicking. You grab Jack’s hand about to make a run for it when two men step out with guns aimed. “You two, call off the mutt and come with us.” The first man demands. You pick up Jack who clings onto you. “Now.” The man demands.

You look back but see you guys are just out of reach to yell for help. “Bear, down.” You order. Bear looks at you with a confused look but backs away anyway.

“Make him go.” The man orders.

You swallow hard before nodding slowly. “Bear, go to Arthur.” Bear gets excited knowing that when you say that it usually means Arthur is home and a new play buddy had arrived. He turns and growls at the men one more time before running towards camp.

“Alright, now you two come with us.”

“Can the boy stay? He won’t say anythin’,” You feel like you’re practically begging but the men don’t seem swayed.

“Both. Let’s go.”

You look back at camp one last time. You knew you had a pistol hidden by Jack when you picked him up. You decide the safest bet would probably be going now and getting help later. “Jack, we are going to go with these men okay?”

“Why do they have guns?” He asks as you begin to follow them.

“They use them to make sure… African Lions… don’t attack us on our journey.”

Jack giggles, “Silly Aunt Y/N there aren’t any Lions here.”

You smile and play along, “Ah. How do you know? You haven’t seen one, right?” Jack shakes his head no, “Well I know for a fact that Arthur saw one a few months ago.” Jack’s jaw drops, “It tried to eat him too.”

“Arthur must be strong.”

You look at the two men watching you as you walk, “He’s very strong. And has a short fuse.” You say the last part louder. They ignore you so you continue to distract Jack for the duration of the trip to the manor.

“Shut it you two.” The second man yells as you walk up to the Braithwaite manor.

You watched the front doors as they swung open and you honestly didn’t know if the two of you would be okay. Mrs. Braithwaite stepped out.

“Ah, the pawns are here.” She says grimly.

“We are actually about to go.” You say as you pull the pistol from under Jack and aim it at her. Instantly more men appear holding guns aimed at you. You kick yourself for not figuring that more people would be here. “Let’s us go…”

“I’m afraid we need to use you two for revenge.”

Before you have time to respond, a gun hits the back of your head making you blackout.

___________________

Arthur rides back into camp still stressed over Sean’s death. Arthur knew that the boy didn’t deserve to be killed. And he was already fuming with Micah… well being Micah. He just wanted to see you. He knew simply seeing your face would not make it all feel as bad as it all was. He wanted to just hold you for a while before needing to face what had to happen.

He hitches up Athena and looks over the camp to see a crowd forming in front of Dutch’s tent. “Arthur.” He calls to him in a panicked voice. His face seems as white as snow as he puts a hand on Arthur’s shoulder, “Have you seen the boy? Jack? Or was Y/N with you?”

Arthur looks at him confused, “No… I just had finished Bill burry Sean,” He looks around as Henry and Abigail start to march towards them.

“Where’s my son?” Abigail demands. “Where is my son Dutch Van Der Linde?”

“We can’t find Y/N either,” Henry adds.

“I saw her this morning when I was lookin’ for Jack, she said she’d check by the river.”

Arthur looks around, “Well where’s Bear. He follows her everywhere.” At the sound of his name, Bear darts out of Arthur’s tent and sits in front of Arthur. “The one damn time…” He mumbles, “Bear, go get Y/N.” He commands getting Bear excited. He barks and darts towards the last place he saw you.

Arthur and the other three follow close behind him until Bear stops by the log and starts growling as he sniffs the ground. “Everyone,” Hosea calls out walking up behind the group. “Kieran says he thought he saw some men near the camp. Said they looked like Braithwaites.”

Dutch’s face starts to turn red. “Let’s go pay them a visit then.” Arthur and Henry follow both getting equally angry. “Abigail, we will bring your boy back.”

“Dutch,” Bill calls as he, Charles, Javier, Lenny, and John all join them, “We heard about Jack and Y/N, do you need some extra men?”

“Of course,” Dutch says as he climbs his horse, “Micah, Pearson, keep an eye on the camp.”

Arthur takes off before half the men are even on their horses yet. Soon he’s joined by John, Henry and then Dutch and Hosea. He can hear the others but at the moment his concerns are making sure you and Jack are safe.

“Who steals a child?” John asks still in disbelief.

“Jack will be fine. He must’ve been taken as a pawn. No one wants to ever hurt a child.” Hosea tries to reassure him. “Besides, if Y/N’s with him he’ll be well protected.”

“I’ll kill any of those bastards if they hurt my sister,” Henry says looking scarily a bit like an angry Dutch.

“I can assure you, you ain’t the only one.” Arthur grunts.

All the men stop outside the manor parking their horses on the side of the road. “Alright… As hard as it’s gonna be let’s keep our heads,” Hosea warns all the men. “Our goal is to get the two and get out.”

All men nod in agreement before walking calmly in a line towards the manor. Everyone has a pistol out and ready to go if need be. Two men from the house walk up to meet them.

“Well well, knew you’d all show up.”

“Where’s my son, you bastard?” John starts but Dutch holds out a hand stopping him.

“We want my daughter, and his son returned immediately.”

One of the men laughs and smacks his brother’s shoulder, “I told you she was his.” His brother chuckles, “See? Didn’t I say they had the same angry face when she tried to pull a fast one on us.”

Arthur and Henry tense up hearing that you tried something. “You are correct dear brother, She put up a good fight too. Until we finally got her.” Arthur began to raise a gun to ask what he meant when Henry fires at the man killing him instantly and plunging everyone into a fight.

The gang scatters and hides behind stuff to take out the men outside before going to search the house. Arthur stays near Henry still unsure if the boy could fight in a gunfight. “Alright,” Dutch calls, “Let’s search inside.”

Arthur checks the whole house before meeting the rest of the men upstairs. He sees Dutch and Hosea trying to open the door to a bedroom. He quickly joins them and with a final heave, the cabinet in front of the door falls over.

“Thank you, Arthur,” Dutch says quickly as they head in the room quickly knocking out two men.

“She’s in here,” Dutch says pulling out the old woman by her collar. “Where’s my daughter.” Dutch demands.

“You killed my sons!” She screamed.

“And I’m sure you have more I can kill too if you don’t tell me where you are hiding Y/N and Jack.” Dutch groans as she refuses to talk. “Fine, burn the place.” He shoots one of the bodies in the head making the woman scream before dragging her to the front of the house.

“The house is empty, we searched everywhere,” Hosea says angry, “I told you she was crazy, Dutch.”

“That you did.” He throws the old lady on the ground. “Now. Where are they?”

“I sold them.” She yells, “To Angelo Bronte.”

“Angelo Bronte in Saint Denise?” Arthur asks.

“Yes, and they are either there, or on a boat to Italy.” She spits at Arthur.

“Let’s go then,” Dutch says turning away and having to practically drag Henry with him.

“What about her?” Arthur asks.

“Leave her, she has nothing left to live for anyway.” Dutch waves off the old woman as she runs towards the manor up in flames.

_____________________

You woke with a jump to find yourself in a huge plush bed with white sheets. Jack is curled into a ball sleeping next to you in very nice looking clothes. You glance at yourself to see that you’re in a white nightgown. You seemed to be in a mansion or something.

You shake Jack softly, “Jack... where are we?”

The boy sits up and yawns, “Auntie Y/N you’re awake!” He hugs you tightly, “Papa Bronte said the ‘mean hillbillies’ hit you in the head really hard.”

“Papa Bronte?” You ask confused.

“That would be me.” A voice says as the doors to the bedroom open. A man in a red robe with a weird black hat on, walk in the room and smile. “I hope you are feeling better.”

“You’re… Luca’s father.” You say still not fully awake.

“Ah, so you are the music shop-girl my son used to pine over.” He cheered in a thick Italian accent. “He’ll be so happy to know you are here.”

“Sir… I’m sorry but I must bring him back to his mother.”

“No!” He snaps in a scary voice. “You will stay here and they can come for you if they want.” He adds back in his soft voice.

You tighten your grip on Jack just a bit. Bronte suddenly claps his hands making you jump, “Let us go down and see if dinner is ready. We are having spaghetti.”

“What’s that?” Jack asks you. You simply shrug and get up to follow the man. You keep a tight hold on Jack's hand as he follows you.

“Where are your slippers?” Bronte asks as you two exit the room.

“Slippers?” You ask as the man claps his hands and a maid appears out of another room. She quickly enters your room and comes back with two pairs of slippers. She places each pair at yours and Jack’s feet.

“These are your night ones.” He explains. You and Jack look at each other before slipping them on. “Good, let us head downstairs, I’m famished.”

You follow him downstairs to a dining room with a huge wooden table in the middle. Only three plates are set up.

“Do you live alone here, Mr. Bronte?” You ask as you and Jack sit down.

“Ah yes, it gets lonely. But at least I have company.” He gestures to the two of you as two butlers come in and set plates of a weird dish in front of you and Jack.

You both look at it confused. “It looks like worms…” Jack whispers to you.

“This is Spaghetti. It’s pasta in tomato sauce.” Bronte explains. “It’s food, I promise.”

You still look at it a bit concerned but Jack shrugs a bit and tries it. You watch him for a reaction. He smiles after the first bite. “It’s really good Auntie Y/N.” You sigh with relief and try a bite as well. Jack wasn’t wrong. It’s really good. However, you aren’t sure you are eating it right.

“I’m glad the two of you are enjoying the meal. How is your head miss?” He asks you before taking another bite.

“It’s sore, but I’ll be okay… I’ve had worse in the past.” You look down a bit.

“I expected that, living with cowboys. Must be a mess.” You smile a bit. “Do you have a cowboy?” He asks you making your cheeks red.

“I… uh…”

Jack cuts you off, “She’s gonna get married to Uncle Arthur.”

You blush like crazy and shush him, “What? Who told you that?”

“Momma said that since you moved into his tent that must mean you are going to get married.” He says, repeating his mother’s words.

“Well… let’s not spread rumors.” You say quickly taking another bite.

“Arthur, huh?” Bronte asks. “Tell me, miss, is he better than my son?” You eye him across the table. This was a test. You knew it. If you say yes he gets angry because you don’t like his son, which you don’t. But if you say no… he could possibly use that to his advantage. In any case, you lose.

You sigh and shrug, “I was never truly with your son. I always thought we were just friends.” You lie to him and you feel like he can tell. “How long was I out for, sir?”

He thinks a bit, “Perhaps a day…” He says as if he isn’t truly sure.

Before you can ask another question there’s a knock at the door. A servant peaks his head in. “Sir… There are some men here to see you.” You grab Jack’s hand as Bronte stands.

“Of course, they seem quick. Make sure these two get upstairs to their room.”

You look at him and stand up, “I would like to see my father.” You say trying to seem taller than you are.

Bronte gives you a dirty look, “You will go upstairs.” He says in a threatening tone. “Now.” Before he gets scarier you pick up Jack and take him upstairs.

“But I wanna see my Pa…” Jack sighs sadly as you sit him on your bed.

“We will.” You promise him. “Do you know where my clothes are?”

“They threw them away.” You groan and put your hands on your head. “I kept this though,” Jack adds making you look at him. He lifts his pillow and shows you your gun belt he had hidden. “I couldn’t find your gun though…” You hug Jack tightly.

“Well… I guess now we gotta wait.”

_______________

It seemed like hours later when you finally heard a knock at your door. Jack had been sitting on the bed asking you to make up stories to tell him while you sat on the bench at the foot of the bed. You stood up as the door opened and stood in front of Jack.

Bronte gave a fake smile, “Ah, it looks as if they are awake.”

Before you can think of a witty response he opens the door wider and you see your dad walk in.

“Pa…” You smile as he pulls you into a strong hug. You don’t realize you started crying a bit until you pull away and he quickly wipes your cheeks. “Took you long enough,” You adding jokingly.

“My dear girl, I’m sorry. A lot happened…” You look at him confused, “The Grays… they tricked us. Sean died…” You sat back on the bench taking it in. “Then when we were looking for you the Pinkertons found us and we had to move camp.”

“We moved again?” You ask.

“We had no choice. But we are closer to Saint Denis now.” You sighed still saddened about Sean. Yeah, he could be annoying but he was always nice. “I’m glad you are okay, Jack,” Dutch says as the boy sits by you.

“Where’s Henry? Or Arthur…” You ask standing again.

“Mr. Bronte here sent them on a little job in exchange for you two.”

Bronte speaks up again, “Oh yes… Let me have one of my maids get you some more medicine for the back of your head.” He walks away.

“What happened?” Dutch asked getting mad.

“It’s nothing, I tried to pull a gun on the Braithwaites and one of them hit me over the head.” You feel the back of your head… of course it was still tender.

“Well…” your father thinks a moment. “I probably would have done that as well.”

You smile at each other as he kisses your forehead. “Also… what are you wearing?” He asks looking at your nightgown.

“They put me in this and threw my clothes away. Said they were dirty,” You roll your eyes annoyed. “My favorite pair of pants…” Well, your only. “I’ll have to buy some new ones.”

“Well, I’m just happy you aren’t hurt too much.”

“Let’s go wait outside… Jack and I are pretty tired of being indoors.” You suggest.

“Great idea. Fresh air always helps. Besides, I believe we have to have a heart to heart chat.” He pats your shoulder as he turns away. Luckily it seems he doesn’t see your face turn pale.

Great. What’s he going to ask? You thought to yourself. He must know about Arthur and me.

The three of you walk to the front yard. You and Dutch sit on the step while Jack runs around the gated yard looking for bugs. “Bronte mentioned something in passing when we were talking.”

You gulp, “What did he say?” You try to sound nonchalant.

“Well… He kept referring to Arthur as your… Fiance.” There it was.

You look away from him pretending to check on Jack. “Oh… Well, Jack was just repeatin’ somethin’ Abigail had said jokingly.” You are a horrible liar and you know it but you were not ready for him to know.

“So there is no truth to it?” He asks in the tone you have learned to know means he knows your full of shit.

“Well…” You weren’t one to lie to family about something as big as marriage. “It ain’t completely not true.” You kick yourself as your voice gets a tad higher at the end.

“And what does that mean? Did Arthur ask you?”

You finally look at him. In all honesty, he seems a bit betrayed. You couldn’t understand why. “Well no. He didn’t.” You say honestly, “I… I asked him.”

“Did ya now…” You can hear a tint of anger.

“Yeah… and… he may have accepted. I mean we’ve been together for what… almost half a year now?”

“And you didn’t think of asking me?” And there was the main problem. He wasn’t involved.

“Well, Daddy,” You pull out the sweet words, “I wanted it to just be me and Arthur for a bit before we bring everyone in. We ain’t even sure it’s gonna happen yet seeing as we are runnin’ from Pinkertons.” Before Dutch has time to respond the front gate opens making you sigh in relief, “Oh, thank god.”

You stand and run to Arthur. He meets you halfway and pulls you into a strong hug. Despite Dutch giving us eyes, Arthur lifts your face to his and kisses you long and hard. “You are just a magnet of trouble ain’t ya.” He says softly as he hugs you again.

“One of my many talents.” You say with a grin.

“Pa!” Jack yells and runs to John. John drops to his knees and hugs him tightly.

“I assume the job is done?” Bronte asks appearing on the doorstep.

“Yeah. All done.” Arthur says without letting you go.

“Well then, I assume you are free to go. But do try to come to my garden party at the mayor’s.” And with that Bronte disappears inside.

“Let’s go get you some clothes,” Arthur says as he brings you to his horse and lifts you on.

“Arthur we gotta talk.” You say in a quiet tone.

“What happened?” He looks at you a bit concerned.

“Bronte… he told Dutch about us.”

“I hope your father knows we are together.” He jokes as you start riding back to camp with John and Dutch in front.

“No you silly man, he told Dutch about us being engaged.”

Arthur quickly pulls his horse to be slower, “How did he find that out?”

“Jack had heard his momma makin’ a joke about it and took it seriously.”

“So basically the whole camp kinda figured it out?”

“I’m not sure…” You sighed, “I liked it bein’ our secret for a bit.”

You can feel him chuckle as your arms are wrapped around him, “Yeah me too.”

“To be perfectly honest… I just wanted to elope.” You admit making Arthur stop his horse completely.

He turns so he can look at you properly. “Really?”

You nod, “But now Dutch is gonna make it a big thing.”

He nods a bit in agreement before rummaging through his bag. “To be perfectly honest with you as well,” He pulls out two silver bands. “I kinda wanted the same thing.”

You both look at each other and smile. “Mr. Morgan, how did you get these?”

He chuckles and hands you the smaller one. You get a closer look at it and see a small diamond on it. “I paid for them.” He smiles proudly.

“We gonna do this on Athena?” You ask smiling.

“Well, you're already in white. So nows a good time as ever.” You both chuckle at each other.

________________________

He takes you to a small cliff overlooking the Heartlands. The sun was starting to just peak it’s head over the horizon. He hops off of Athena and carefully helps you down. You notice he has on the blue shirt you love so much. It really brings out all the colors in his blue-green eyes. He looks around the ground for a moment before saying a soft ‘ah-ha’ and bends down to pull some wildflowers. He hands all but one to you. You giggle as he puts the one he kept in your ear.

“There. Extra beautiful.” He says with a smirk.

You dust some dirt from his shoulder and step closer to him, “Ah… already perfect.” You say making him roll his eyes.

You both just stare at each other for a moment. You can feel how red your face is and you can see his cheeks turning red. “I don’t know how to do this.” You admit shyly.

“Me neither…” He softly takes your hand and slips the ring on your finger. “Y/N I promise to always take care of you. I’ll cherish you forever and always keep you safe, warm and happy. I love you so dang much.”

You take his hand and slip his ring on to his finger. “Arthur, I promise to always have your back and protect you. I’ll care for you when you are ill and even when you are healthy. I feel like the luckiest woman to have you. I love you so much.”

He takes your face in his hands and kisses you passionately. It was different from the other kisses you’ve shared with him. It felt almost magical in a sense that made you feel silly. You can feel him smile as he holds you close to him.

“Well, I do believe I’m allowed to call you Mrs. Morgan now.”

#rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #rdr2 fandom #rdr #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x female reader #dutch van der linde #dutch x Daughter!reader #john marston #hosea mathews #abigail roberts #writing #creative writing #write #fanfic #fanficition

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cowboylovins101 · 6 years ago

Text

MICAH HITS ON TAKEN READER

Mini-drabbles

Warnings: None

Tags: No one

Decided to do this as baby drabbles so you can have both your boys, but the setup is the same!!

-------------------------------------------------------------

It had been a few weeks now, the glances, the teasing remarks, and frankly you were getting sick of it. For some odd reason, one you could not fathom given your opinion of him, Micah had gained an interest in you. You’re not sure where it came from, you two barely interacted with each other apart from one instance. You had zoned out while walking, bumping right into his chest, hands having placed themselves upon it for support. At your frantic apologies, he had placed his hands upon your hip, giving you a sly grin. Although, you had pushed him off, that one moment somehow peaked his interest. At least that’s the only thing you could think of. Perhaps you hadn’t been rude enough, who knows.

At first it was just staring. You could feel his gaze on you whenever you walked by. Then it was subtle comments, about how you dressed, what you were doing, a certain implication in his tone that he had mean’t something more. You brushed it off for the most part, not wanting to engage him more than needed. Unfortunately for you, to him that mean’t you hadn’t minded. You weren’t much of a fighter, not very good at it, and you certainly didn’t want to start something being as you were relatively new to the group. That was a mistake.

You had bent down to pick up a bundle of logs, wanting to bring them towards the fire to keep the kindling supply high, when you felt a hand touch your backside. You shot straight up, whipping your head around only to find Micah giving you that smile you’d grown to detest. You opened your mouth to say something, wanting to slap the shit out of him, when you spot your lover over his shoulder, as look of fire in his eyes.

Arthur:

Arthur had noticed that Micah had been bothering you, as he did everyone really, but you had assured him time and again that you were fine. It’s not that he didn’t trust you, but he certainly didn’t trust Micah. And now, seeing him put his hands on you? That was the final fucking straw.

He marches over, teeth gritted and hands fisted. Without even saying anything he swings, fist meeting the side of Micah’s cheek, when he had turned to the sound of Arthur’s raging footsteps. Micah tumbled to the dirt below, pissed as all hell.

“What the hell Morgan!? You got a problem cowboy?” Arthur grabs the front of his shirt, pulling him to his face, Micah’s hands grabbing at his to try and loosen the hold to no avail.

“I saw you, you snake.” he shakes Micah a bit, “If I ever see you put your goddamn hands on my Darlin’ again. I’ll gut you.” He whispers the last part, tone low and dangerous. He throws Micah back to the dirt and the bruised man quickly stands, wiping the cut he had gotten on his cheek with the back of his hand. He looks aggressively between the two of you before he lets out a huff, his eyes landing on yours.

“Why the fuck didn’t you tell me you two were dating you piece of shit.” Before either you or Arthur could say anything, Micah is stomping off somewhere else. He yells over his shoulder about how he’ll be back to get at Arthur, but the man in question waves a hand at him. Arthur sighs, rubbing a hand to the back of his neck. He turns to you, giving you a questioning glance, you nod, you’re alright. He grabs at the firewood you had dropped and before you can protest he’s already carrying it off. You trail behind him, a small smile on your face, you wanted to tell him you could’ve done that yourself, but...you didn’t mind his protection.

Charles:

Charles was ready to kill that bastard Micah. Hell he was planning to for weeks now, ever since he noticed the interest he had in you. While he wanted you to learn how to deal with problems yourself, he couldn’t help but watch closely whenever Micah was near you. And this time, this time he had to step in. Dropping the piece of wood he’d been whittling away at, he stands, wasting no time in marching over to the two of you. For the most part his body language was normal, his pace and clearly soured face were the only indicators of his anger.

“Hey Micah.” Micah turns, face turning from a smirk to a frown as he sees Charles make his way over. Charles stops a foot or so in front of him, brows furrowed deeply as he gives one of the most venomous glares you’ve seen on him. This only makes Micah step closer, getting angry himself.

“What do you want redskin. Can’t you see I’m busy,” He places a hand on Charles chest, “Fuck off.” he pushes, which was a poor choice on his part. Charles grabs the front of Micah’s shirt, Lifting him off the ground with his sheer strength, letting his feet dangle as Charles practically growls his next words.

“Dont. Touch.” Before Micah could reply Charles throws him off to the side, his back hitting the harsh ground with a thud. Charles moves to stand in front of you now, blocking you from Micah’s view as he gathers his bearings on the ground.

“Don’t touch what doesn’t belong to you. Y/Ns mine.” This seemed to only make Micah angrier as he stands, but the force of the throw causes him to stagger, knees bent as he tries to regain balance.

“You didn’t tell me you and the fuckin’ redskin were together,” he takes a moment, deciding its not worth it, “Fuck you Charles.” He wanders off, back covered in dirt and step uneven from the pain. Charles turns to look at you, face still pulled in disgust, but not quite as harsh as before. You poke the lines forming on his forehead from the furrowing and he relaxes slightly. Without word he guides you away, taking half the wood pile from you. You could’ve made comment about not being anyone’s property but, you found you quite liked belonging to Charles, just a little bit.

#charles smith imagine #charles smith x reader #rdr #writing #rdr2 #arthur morgan imagine #arthur morgan x reader

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nie7027 · 6 years ago

Text

Super5 headcanons pt 2

Edit: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

Minegishi can only stare

"Where the fuck have you been?"

"What do you care?"

"Why are you here?"

"I was bored"

Shimazaki could be here to kill him for betraying him but Minegishi is too tired for this and there are dishes to wash.

In the time it takes him to do the dishes and calm down his plants, shimazaki falls asleep so he goes to the living to room to get a better look at the man

Shimazaki looks almost the same except maybe a bit thinner and with possible hollower eyes. The crooked nose is definitely new. A crooked nose?? Did he broke his nose at some point?? He is even wearing the same clothes as last time. His precious jacket ripped at the edges. Scorching marks and bullet holes here and there.

With a long sigh he takes out his phone, turns off the volume and opens the super3 chat(the too spicy for Seris innocent eyes). The messages start to come in rapidly

Minegishi: Shimazaki is back

Hatori: what

Hatori: what do you mean Shimazaki is back???

Shibata: how did he find us? Did he try to fight you?

Minegishi: i mean he is asleep on my couch. No, he just ate all of my cereal.

Shibata: what the fuck?

Hatori: what the fuck?

Minegishi what the fuck indeed

Shibata: did he say what he wants? Do you know why is he here?

Minegishi: He didnt talk and I dont know

Hatori: what do we do?

Minegishi:

Minegishi: i dont know.

Minesishi: i cant make any calls or else he could wake up and seri isnt logged in so can someone call him and tell him whats going so they can take the necessary precautions

Shibata: im on it

Shibata: hatori is freaking out in his room anyway. I think he is begginin to build a security system.

Minegishi: ...

Shibata: yeah yeah ill go calm him after i talk with Seri.

Minegishi stares at his phones and then at the man on his couch, he cant blame them. Shimazaki is a really dangerous person and they dont know what he is doing here. Minegishi just wanted to do the dishes, water his plants and go to sleep.

The super5 will never know but Shimazaki wasnt lying per se. He WAS bored.

After he ran away from the fight against seasoning city espers he hid here and there taking his sweet time at recovering and once he did(his nose still felt strange but he ignored it) he started to look at what to do.

He joined many criminal organizations, afterall a teletransporter was very valued in the underworld. But not matter how petty or big the crime was, he got bored. So he ended leaving all of them. he even left some in the middle of a important job, not caring whether his employers got caught or not( it was their fault for being stupid and not having a backup plan anyway)

After some months of this he realized he was bored of normal criminals. He was bored of normal persons with narrowed mindsets who conformed with just comitting stupid crimes. HE HAD BEEN PART OF A PLAN TO TAKE THE WORLD and now he was trafficking some drug?? Lame.

Most of all he missed the thrilling sensation of being surrounded with persons that could actually put a fight against him. So he searched for something alike to claw, an organization of espers.

His search turned out fruitless and he decided then he should return to where all started. Claw. It was time to pay a visit to his expartners.

It took him just a week to locate them. It would have took him just a day but he was finally having some fun and god he was gonna drag it all he could.

So here he was in a tiny empty apartment, the crazy amount of plants with a certain aura being the only indication that it belonged to Minegishi...WHERE THE HELL WAS HE? Oh well. He had been waiting for a year. He could wait a little more. In any case in his hurry to get here he forgot to eat and he could hear a fridge running.

Shimazaki, still on the sofa, wakes up the next day at the sound of a blender. He is being held in place, bounded by lots and lots of thick green vines and sturdy roots from which he easily frees himself. The moment he does so the noise at the kitchen stops and an annoyed minegishi steps out. Shimazaki can feel him tensing, preparing for an attack and that makes him smirk .

Until an alarm clock goes off that makes Minegishi mutter a curse

"If you are gonna do something do it now. I have better things to do and i have to go now"

"Better things to do?? What can possibly be better than this??"

"I have work so if you are gonna just stand there and smirk be my guest"

"Work?"

"Yeah, work. you know? That thing you do for a living and that contributes to society? Fuck it.You probably dont. Anyway i gotta go" Turning his back on shimazaki is probably the worst idea but he couldnt sleep at all, he is late and he hasnt had breakfast so if shimazaki wants to kill him he will gladly accept it.

He miraculously manages to exit his apartment and make it to his work. He only hopes theres an apartment to come back later.

Shimazaki can only stare increduously to where minegishis used to stand. 'Work'? 'Contribute to society'? THE FUCK WAS HE BABBLING ABOUT this was completely unexpected and he doesnt know what to do until he notices theres a smell coming from the kitchen where Minegishi left his untouched breakfast. Well he supposes he can muse how to proceed over breakfast.

Hatori isnt allowed to use his phone at work but he is too anxious to care and he has powers to do it without anybody noticing

Spicy3 chat

Hatori: how did it went?

Minegishi: ...well...i guess?? I am alive and my flat was still in one piece last time i saw it

Hatori: he didnt try anything?

Minegishi: he woke up when it was time for me to go...so i just kinda left

Shibata: you just left? He didnt try to stop you???

Minegishi: no

Minegishi:but i think...

Hatori: WHAT

Shibata:what

Minegishi: i think he is...tired.

Minegishi: I bound him while he was sleeping and he never woke up nlr stirred. He didnt notice.

Hatori: weird

Minegishi: i know. Worst of all i couldnt eat and i have 2 hours more left until my break.

Shibata: i can pass on my way to gym and sneak you something

Minegishi: thanks

Hatori: if you want you can hang in our apartment for the time being. We still need to know what he wants

Shibata: yeah, and if he shows up we can fight him together💪

Minegishi: if Seri asks, everything is under control

It takes a week for Shimazaki to finally show up. Meanwhile Minegishi has to use Hatoris and Shibatas washing machine to wash his work uniform daily(it can get very dirty when you work in a flower shop) because his other sets of uniform are back at his place trapped with Shimazaki. So is his money and he has to lend some from Hatoris and shibatas and ask his boss for an advencement in his payment. He hates Shimazaki more now.

They cant do anything but stare blankly when he suddenly shows up in the middle of the living room where they were eating pizza holding an empty box of cereal and says "Theres no more food back there and i want more of these but i cant see how they are called" while pointing at the box.

Sometimes its very easy to forget he is actually blind. Hatori weakly says the name of the branch of cereal he is holding and Shimazaki dissapears again before anybody can say anything.

"Did everybody saw what i just saw right??what the fuck? What the fuck?" shibata exclaims

"...my food"minegishi laments

Its not until an hour of wondering what was that and wracking their brain for an asnwer after that shimazaki returns, a brand new box of the cereal in his hands. He picks up a slice of the forgotten pizza and sits besides Shitaba.

"You didnt pay for that did you?" asks Shitaba

Shimazaki just turns around and stares st him with his hauntingly empty eyes "you too?"

"PAY? WORK? CONTRIBUTE TO SOCIETY? THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ALL OF YOU"

"Weve changed"

"Yeah we have jobs and stuff, we help peopl"

"YOU HAVE SUPERPOWERS! WHY ARE YOU EVEN WORKING?"

"TO NOT PARASITE ON OTHERS HARD WORK LIKE SOME PEOPLE IN HERE" finally explodes Minegishi

The man frowns and rapidly done with the conversation teleports away.

Minegishi finally returns to his place, his web of plants telling him Shimazaki isnt there anymore. Re stashing his fridge and cabinet is a pain in the ass.

Shimazakis plan had been to either find his expartners and form something alike to Claw with them or just antagonize them until he gets the fight he so much craves. None of that has happened because all of them had turned to a bunch of weakling pussies and he cant even find Serizawa.

He could still try to fight them but he bitterly realizes he wont get any satisfaction of beating them if they keep acting like that, restraining themselves and trying to be civil as if they werent the same persons that destroyed this very city a year ago. It would be like punching flowers!

The point was to get rid of his boredness and now he is just angry!

He needs them to drop the act.

Thats when a plan starts to form in his head and he smirks. He is going to show them what they are missing on.

Thats how he finds himself back in minegishis apartment.

"Im just saying you could probably grow tons of weed, good quality of course. And i take care of the transport i know a bunch of people-"

"Weed? Are you serious? Is this why you came back? To start a drug trafficking bussines?"

"Im just saying with my teletransporting abilities and yourplant thing we could save lots of money in transport and become richer than-"

"No"

"AREN YOU TIRED OF THIS? OF SHITTY CUSTOMERS GETTING YOU IN TROUBLE JUST BECAUSE THEY DONT KNOW RAINBOW ROSES DONT NATURALLY EXIST?"

"WHERE YOU SPYING ME AT WORK?"

"MAYBE SO"

"DONT DO IT AND STOP EATING ALL MY FOOD"

He then tries with shibata, approaching him during one of his morning running routines. Teletransporting every 2 meters at his side while he keeps running clearly ignoring him

"With your force, not that i need it, we could terrorize all the bussines of a whole prefecture and force them to pay for protection. We win, they win"

"Not interested"

"Why not?! It would be so easy"

"I dont want to"

"Could you stop running? This is important"

"No thanks"

"You arent even listening!"

"Good"

He finally tries with Hatori thinking he would be the easiest of them

"You hack the system and we force all those politicians to pay us to not release all their dirty secrets"

"I am busy"

"No you are not. You are playing mario kart. I can hear Yoshi"

"Ive changed"

"Have you? Really???" at this point Shimazaki raises an eyebrow, he is so done and he wont keeo with this bullshit "because everywhere i have been, and i have been everywhere, the interpol, cia, you name it HAS BEEN AFTER ME whereas you three can waltz into a store like nobodys bussiness. WE COMMITED THE SAME CRIME. WE DESTROYED THIS CITY so how come im the only one being persecuted? Huh? You think I DONT KNOW WHAT YOU DID"

Hatori pauses the game and glares at him. Good, he is finally getting a reaction.

" i did what had to be done and i wont let YOU of all people tell me-"

"Me? Of all people? You believe yourself so grand and high when you are nothing but THE SAME AS ME" immediately shimazaki feels hatoris aura flare. what must have been his console shifting and changing into something new. Whatever it is, he is sure he can block it.

"Really? You are gonna fight me? I want to see you-" a horrible sound like nothing he had ever heard before pierces his ears making him howl in pain and he teleports away.

After that accident shimazaki never mentions Hatoris dirty secret again but that doesnt stop him from keep trying to get them to commit felonies again.

He thinks he once "saw" Serizawa on the street but his aura was quickly eaten by the aura of the person by his side. He didnt stayed to find out and quickly teleported away.

And this goes like this for 3 months, his proposals becoming more and more desesperate until one day he just... gives up.

Shimazaki should have left or killed them months ago but for some reason he prefers to stay here. He wont admit it but hes having more fun living on their couches annoying them than what he would have had they accepted his proposals.

He takes special delight in annoying them when they had hard days. (Minegishi comes home covered in something stinky and almost strangles shimazaki with his own hands after he comments this wouldnt have happened if he had accepted to traffick weed in a yacht with him)

...besides he has noticed that now in both apartments there is always a box of his favourite cereal (hatori sweared it was the cereal what placated Shimazaki given how docile he was whenever he was seen eating it, shibata and minegishi just liked it)

The super3 cant believe it themselves but they have now gotten used to the constant presence of Shimazaki in their lives (which isnt surprising given they spent at least 3 years together).

Well constant is a way to put it because the man still has the habit of dissapearing 3-5 days every once in a while and reappearing like nothing happened

But they know this cant keep going like this and thats how minegishi finds himself texting the super3 chat one day he comes to an empty apartment

Minegishi: is shimazaki there?

Hatori: yeah, hes playing smash with shitaba

Minegishi: playing smash??

Hatori: its seems he learned the patron of my movements by observing me and now hes kicking Shitabas ass as princess peach

Minegishi: ?

Hatori: we told him he was playing bowser

Minegishi: whatever, tell him to bring his ass back. I need to go grocery shopping and i need his help

"Why would i help you grocery shopping?" says shimazaki suddenly to his right

At the same his phone sounds 2 times

Shibata: hatori said something to him and he just teleported

Shibata: is safe to assume he is with you?

Minegishi: yea, im taking charge from here

"Im teaching you to do grocery shopping"

"I dont need you to teach me shit"

" yes, you do if you want to keep eating that cereal you like and that you finished this morning"

Shimazaki raises his eyebrow, teleports and after 5 min returns with 5 boxes of the damn cereal in his arms

"There. Its done"

"DID YOU JUST ROBBED THEM? YOU CANT KEEP DOING THIS"

"WHY NOT? ITS EASIER"

"THATS NOT THE POINT"Minegishi stops, breathes amd tries again "Shimazaki you cant keep doing this and i dont mean just the whole robbing, i mean i dotn know what you do when you dissapear for days but when you are here you just eat our food, wait for us to come home from work and then annoy us?"

"So? I can do whatever i want"

"Do you realize how pathethic it sounds?Is this really all you want to do? Do you even know what you want to do?"

Shimazaki doesnt wanna hear anymore of that and teleports

He ends teleporting to a random alley where he passes the night

The next days his mood isnt any better and he spends them sleeping, terrorizing random deliquents he finds in his way and kicking bags of trash until one day of the "bags" lets out a yelp.

Its shibata who finds him some days later during one of his running routines when he follows the sound of a hurt dog

Expecting to see a bunch of nasty kids terrorizing a poor animal he steps up to confront them only to find his missing "friend" glaring at poor dog and screaming "STOP COMPLAINING ITS YOUR FAULT FOR NOT MOVING I DIDNT EVEN KICK YOU THAT HARD"

He texts a quickl "Found him" to the group chat and marches up to him

"You shouldnt be kicking random things in the first place"

"Get lost"

" are you sure you didnt kick him hard? He is limping and we both know your kicks arent exactly soft"

"If i had wanted, a limp would be the least of its problems" still he makes a face as if he isnt sure

With a sigh Shibata carefully picks up the dog and motions to shimazaki "theres a vet nearby. You kicked him so you own him that at least. Dont worry ill pay" he doesnt wait for Shimazakis response and walks, relief overflowing him once he hears footsteps behind him

The consult is quick and the vet gleefully hands shimazaki "his" dog while she explains to shibata the treatment they should follow the next three months

Shimazaki...had never in his life pet a dog, much less carried one. His fur feels dirty and is tangled everywhere but the vet said it just needs a bath. It is warm and he can feel and hear his steady breaths. His mental eye allows him to perceive the flowing of his blood, the currents in his brain, the beating of his heart...all what makes a living being held in his arms. Things he has always perceived but never payed attention. The fact that the dog starts to lick his hands doesnt go unnoticed and he feels strangely calm. His grip tightening.

They are about to exit the clinic, shibata saying his last thanks when a woman and a girl enter. That very moment the dog starts to squirm in his embrace. And he doesnt know what to do

"Hey are you alright? I can hold it if you want" asks shibata noticing his turmoil

" yeah, its just the stupid dog WHO HAS FORGOTTEN HE CANT WALK"

The girls who shibata notices has red puffy narrows her eyes and yells "DONT CALL HIM STUPID YOU ARE THE STUPID" before turning to look at shimazaki, whatever she was going to say next is forgotten as she stares with wide eyes.

Both the moms and shimazakis replies are drowned by the girl scream of "UESAMA! MOM ITS HIM ITS MY DOG"

For some reason shimazaki feels his blood run cold and lifts up the dog even more when the girl comes clashing at his legs desesperately trying to grab her dog

Shibata who noticed shimazakis earlier expression cant believe what hes seeing (please god, please tell me he isnt gonna fight a girl over a dog) when the vet decides to come out to see what is happening

"Im sorry, my little girl believes those boys over there have Uesama"

"ITS HIM"

"Uesama?..." the vet stares some seconds in confusion before her eyes grow wider "Oh how didnt i notice it before! Im sorry sirs but it seems you have found this little girls dogs" the vets looks expectantly at shimazaki

Shimazaki who has been holding a very squirming dog and listening to the screams of a girls is starting to get very annoyed. The tempation to teleport away with the dog too big to ignore. Hes about to do it when he hears the dog crying again.

With a huff he hands it to the very thankful mother and exits the clinic as quickly as he can.

Shibata follows suit "I saw your face before they arrived. I can tell what you did"

"Shut up"

The walk home is strangely quiet but at least he is back.

The joke on the spicy chat is that the super 3 are dumb and believe they are protecting oh so pure Seri when in reality they just share dumb penis jokes while Seri is actually riding Reigens dick.

And yes as his last crime Hatori threatened with realeasing all the state secrets of all the goverments and provoking a worldwide crisis if they didnt allow them to try to live normal lives

I just noticed this is more of a fanfic than a list of headcanons now but meh. What i wanted to actually be part 2 is gonna be part 3? 4? I didnt even get to write the prank the super5 were gonna pull on shimazaki but now you have something to look up next time.

Im not that happy with how the second half turned out but maybe im just tired.

#mob psycho 100 #mp100 #minegishi toshiki #hatori nazomu #shibata hiroshi #shimazaki ryou #should i tag animal violence?#manga spoilers #mp100 spoilers #super5 headcanons #nie's writing

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buginabog · 5 years ago

Text

Am I Dreaming or Dead? Ch. 2

Summary: sanders sides fantasy story.

Pairings: remile, loceit, royality

Warnings: character death, sympathetic deciet, body horror, cursing

Remy slammed against the wall, pressing his hands against his mouth to suppress his sobs. He slid down the wall slowly, curling into fetal position.

"Well I finally got Kai to slee- Remy? Hon are you ok?" Emile fell in front of Remy and tilted his head up to meet his eyes. "Remy baby, what happened?"

Tears slid down Remys face, "Emile... I fucked up."

Emile pulled Remy into a hug, "hush baby, hush... wanna tell me about it?"

"Logan got mad at me because I didn't warn Virgil about how my eyes feel... and then I told him that Roman-" his breath caught in his throat, "I told him Roman wouldnt want to see him. Because he said he'd find Roman on his own, and I said he wouldnt want to see him."

Emile rubbed his back, "what were you feeling?"

"I was... I was angry."

"At who?"

"...I dont know" he voice broke, "I dont know Em, and I- I couldnt-"

Emile rocked him back and forth, "hush honey, hush. Tomorrow? You go to his house, you try to apologize. And you try to start again. Ok?"

Remy laughed weakly, "where would I be without you?"

Emile kissed his head, "I think we both know the answer to that."

The car was silent as Logan sped towards home, his face grim. It felt like hours before Virgil was brave enough to speak up. "Dad? Does Remy blame you for Roman... leaving?"

Logan sighed and relaxed his grip on the steering wheel, "I- yes. Virgil. Yes he does." He laughed brokenly, "they used to be... the best of friends you know. Roman and Remy, you never saw one without the other. And me and Roman, well. We were like oil and water. We were so different. And we fought so much. Remy used to think Roman went to the woods to- ...never mind. And he blamed me for that."

Virgil frowned and looked away, "thats... kind of dumb."

Logan laughed a little, "people do and think dumb things when they're grieving."

Virgil looked out the window for a while before speaking up again, "why didn't you tell me we were moving to the town my birth father died in?"

Logan started, "he died here?"

Virgil nodded, "yup. In those woods."

Eleven Years Ago

"Poppa? How long are you gonna be gone?"

His Poppa smiled and ruffled his hair, "oh not long, a week or two. Three at most. Ok? And I'll call you every night. Ok Virgie?"

Virgil smiled "ok Poppa!"

Patton gave him one last hug, then stood up to hug his best friend, "thanks for doing this on such short notice Em."

Emile smiled, "not at all! We are best friends after all!"

Patton smiled, "still, thank you."

"What are you doing in that town anyway?"

"Oh, you know, I got an offer to do a logging job." Patton frowned, "its weird though... no one in town wanted the job."

Emile smiled, "well that's a good thing!"

Patton smiled, "yeah. I guess you're right."

Two weeks later

Someone knocked at the door, Emile ran to open it. Virgil couldnt see who it was, because he was in the living room. He could hear voices, though he couldnt hear what they were saying, the voice that wasnt Emiles was deep, and sounded like thunder. And like thunder, it was carrying a message of danger since past.

Emile brought the man into the living room, "hes in here sir."

The man reached out to shake Virgils hand, "hello, I'm Mr. Sanders, what's your name?"

Virgil tentatively reached out his hand, "Virgil."

Mr. Sanders smiled sadly, "do you know why I'm here Virgil?"

Virgil shook his head.

"This is going to be... big news... for a grown adult, even. But for a six year old especially..." mr sanders sighed, "I hate this part of my job, but, it needs to be done." He took a deep breath and looked at Virgil, "your father, Patton Hart, was in a logging accident."

Virgils eyebrows knit together, "what do you mean?"

Mr Sanders sighed, "your father... wont be coming home."

Virgils world froze. Mr Sanders kept talking, but Virgil didnt hear a word. He just... sat. Not thinking, not feeling, not hearing, all he could was sit. Not even a single tear ran down his cheek, all he did was sit.

When he finally came back, he could say one word. And one word only, "Poppa?"

Present Day

Roman walked into the clearing that he had called home for ten years now. "Morality my dear!"

Morality perked up and smiled, "ah, Prince."

Roman sat next to Morality, "do you ever wonder what happened in the outside world? While we stayed frozen in time... what happened out there?"

Morality sighed, "well, sometimes I do." He looked at the river, "you know... I left behind a son. He was only six when I... when this happened. I... I wonder what would have happened if I had never taken that stupid, stupid, STUPID logging job."

Roman sighed, "yknow, I saw... I saw my brother. A little older, but here, at the edge of the forest."

Morality frowned, "why?"

"His son was about to walk into the woods." Roman frowned, trying to remember, "what was his name... Vi-"

"DONT SAY IT!"

Roman started, looking at Morality, who was breathing wild-eyed and panicked, "...Morality?"

"Remeber what I told you? That day? Names have power in the forest."

"Right. Apologies."

Morality relaxed, "its alright my prince. But if that boy has not been taken yet... then we should try our best to keep him free."

Roman nodded, "yes."

They sat in silence before Roman spoke again, "how long has it been?"

Morality sat, "that is three different questions, but I'll answer all three. The woods have been infested ever since, oh, a long, long time back. Look at the height of these trees, they've lived long lives. I'd say this tree has been here for maybe a thousand years, probably more." He looked at Roman, "as for me, ah, I cant tell, and I cant tell how long it's been for you either. While we stay frozen, the world keeps spinning." He laid back, "maybe it's been two years, maybe twenty. Maybe it's only been a month. Who knows who knows indeed."

Roman smiled at his partner in death, "you're rambling again."

Morality sighed, "perhaps. But I'll ramble and ramble till the world ends, if only to fill the silence."

Declan woke up to feel Logan sitting in his bed, "so, you decided Virgil wasnt going to sneak out? Or did you stay out there all night?"

Logna sighed and laid back, "I... I went to the forest. Then I went to Remy's."

Declan frowned, "why?"

"Virgil saw him."

"Saw who? Where?"

Logan turned to Declan, and Declan started to see the tears pouring down his normally stoic husbands face, "He saw Roman. In the woods. And then I did too."

Declan pulled his husband into his lap, "Logan? Are you ok?"

Logan sighed and rested his head on Declans shoulder, "if I found Roman. Do you think he would want to see me?"

Declan frowned, "of course he would, why do you ask?" He sighed as the answer came to him, "Remy?"

Logan nodded mutely.

Declan kissed his forehead, "Remy was warped by anger and frustration, surely you can understand."

Logan sighed, "I know, but... it's hard not to take it to heart."

Declan rocked back and forth, "I know. God, I know." He smiled down at his husband, who was half-asleep, "why dont you get some sleep, ok?"

"I dont-" Logan was interrupted by a huge yawn, "I dont need it."

Declan smirked, "uh-huh. Even though you were up all night?" Logan stuck his tounge out and Declan laughed, "you, sir, are a hypocrite."

Logan rolled his eyes affectionately, "alright, I'll take a nap. Wake me once Virgil wakes up?"

Declan kissed his forehead, "not a moment sooner or later."

Logan yawned, "ok, good. I love you Dee."

Declan smiled, "I love you too." He whispered to his already fast asleep husband.

Virgil sat in his bed, thinking about Remys eyes. His kaleidoscopic eyes that reached into your soul and pulled out every emotion, ever thought youd ever had, and then laid them out for everyone to see.

He had felt so exposed.

Like... like Remy had laid him out on a table for everyone to see.

But he wondered what Remy saw.

So he ran.

He ran through town all the way to an old, dilapidated house with an overgrown yard and pounded on the door.

The door clicked open to reveal Emile, "Virgil? What are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to Remy."

Emile nodded, "ok, come in."

Emile knocked on the doorway to the living room, where Remy was sitting, looking dully at the TV, "Remy dear? Someones here for you."

Remy looked up at Virgil, his jaw dropped and he ran to the teen, "Virgil! I'm sorry. I should have warned you."

Virgil looked up at his uncle, "why did you need to do that?"

Remy stepped back, "I... I just wanted to make sure. Make sure he wasnt lying."

Virgil frowned, "why would he do that?"

Remy sighed, "I dont know."

Virgil nodded, "what did you see?"

Remy frowned, "I saw... a crystal."

"But I never saw a crystal?"

Emile gasped, "crystal...?"

Virgil frowned, "what?"

Emile turned around, "I had a friend who moved here, well he didn't move here but he worked here for a period of time. Well, he died in the woods, but the day before he died, he was...off."

Virgils eyes narrowed and he tensed, "off how?"

Emile gestured around vaguely, "he kept... rambling... I couldnt make it out but I heard something about a crystal and traps and thorns."

Remy frowned, "I think... I think if we looked I could find it... yeah I could find it if we got close."

"Then what do we do?"

"Destroy it." Remy sighed, "I dont know why but... I get the feeling that's what we need to do."

Emile nodded, "so that's what we'll do. Tonight."

Virgil rubbed his arm, "I dunno... I think we should get Logan."

Remy shook his head, "I have been deprived of my best friend for ten years. I'm not waiting another second."

"Logan waited ten years for his brother! He should be here!"

"Logan is the one who got Roman into this mess in the first place!"

"How do you know that!? You never took the time to ask Logan what happened!"

Remy blinked, taken aback, "well, I-"

Virgil huffed, "we go with Logan." He glared at Remy, "I let you dissect my soul. The least you can do is let my dad on the quest to save his brother."

Remy snarled at Virgil, his eyes flashing behind his glasses, "Hes. Not. Coming."

Virgil stood his ground, "why not?"

Remy sighed, "because, smartass, only people who are part warlock can go without, yknow, dying."

"Then why are you letting me go?"

Remys eyes widened, "he didnt tell you..."

Logan sat in the clearing. He had never seen it before. It was beautiful. A stream thread through the meadow, and the skys were clear, oh so clear. He could see every distant galaxy and star.

The faint sound of creaking wood filled the dream.

It came from every side, surrounding him. He looked for the source but saw trees. Only trees. For miles and miles nothing but trees trees trees!

His breathing quickened and he looked around, terrified.

His eyes stopped on a familiar figure.

Roman.

He tried to call out to his brother, but there was a burning in his throat. A petal flew out of his mouth, then a white chrysanthemum burst out of him. Flowers sprouting from every place they could. They writhed around his body, chained him to the earth. His hearing faded as flowers sprouted from them, his sight became clouded with white white white.

When his sight returned he sat in a clearing with a beautiful iridescent crystal in the center. He looked up and saw branches and vines in a writhing dome around the clearing.

Roman sat next to him and rested his hand on his. "Hello Logan."

Logans voice cracked as he whispered, "Roman."

Roman looked at the crystal serenely, "I understand if you're angry."

Logans eyes filled with tears. God. He was crying more in the past three days then he had in years. "I'm not. Just tell me what is happening!"

Roman sighed, "there are... hunters in the woods Lo. And they..." he started crying, "they got me Lo! And I'm so cold and tired and I just wanna go home!"

Logan tried to touch Roman, but his fingers went through, "tell me what to do..."

Roman gestured at the crystal, "send Remy and Declan into the forest, have them break this. Then me and Morality are free."

"Morality?"

Roman smiled, "my partner in death."

Logan nodded, "of course."

Roman looked to the side and frowned, "odd. Theres two warlocks here... Remy and another."

Logan frowned, "Declan?"

"No... " Roman's eyes widened and he clutched Logans hand, "Theres a child! Wake up!"

Logan shot up in bed, panting.

Declan rose up halfway groggily, "Lo? What's going on?"

Logan grabbed his husband, "Declan. Go get your brother. I think hes done something stupid."

Declan frowned, "when has he not?"

Logan growled, "Declan! I think hes gone to the forest!" He looked down as he remembered Roman's words, "theres a child..." his eyes widened, "Virgil!"

Declans eyes widened, "oh my god." He jumped up and ran to the car, dialing Remy.

"Didnt tell me what?" Virgil frowned at his uncle.

Remy sighed, "SO. Me and Declan are Warlocks. That's why my eyes are weird and why Deceit has scales."

Virgil frowns, "...no. he has a skin condition. Looks like he has scales but it's really weird ass skin."

Remy shook his head, "nope. They are most definitely scales."

Remy sighed, "oh my god. You're at least a little bit warlock."

Virgil smirked, "you remember I'm adopted right?"

Remy growled, "well, Declan sensed some warlock blood in you. So suck it up and follow us to the forest."

"I'm WHAT?"

"A warlock." Remy turned and kissed Emile, "love you sweetheart." He looked back at Virgil and walked out, "now come on! That crystal ain't gonna break itself."

Virgil followed him blankly, waving to Wnile, "uuuuh, bye uncle Emile..."

Emile giggled, "oh dear... bye Virge!"

Virgil and Remy arrived at the forest. "You ready kid?" Remy looked over to the shocked teen.

Virgil barely nodded.

He took a breath and sat up straighter, "yes." He looked over to Remy, "I'm ready."

Taglist cause I guess I'm doing this now:

@burningpersonflapsuitcase @an-absolute-failure @lucifer-in-my-head @fury-of-rome @nonbinaryblossom

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bard-dadsquared · 5 years ago

Text

In other news, I do need validation. Long angry rant is about to happen.

The other day I called my Ex on fb so he could talk to our son. I made a comment later that day how he looked like he hadnt been sleeping and how he seemed like he may be depressed, and the person i was talking to was just like

"Poor guy :(("

To which I just shrugged and told them that I didnt feel bad for him, everything he's feeling, he brought on himself.

They said "I feel kinds bad for him because I know he loves you!"

And I'm just???

Maybe he did?? Maybe he does?? But that doesn't negate all the shit he did to drive me the fuck away. I loved him too once. But then everything I said, everything I felt, everything I tried to ask for fell on deaf ears.

I don't feel bad for him because when we moved to the duplex in Texas, he left all the loading and packing to me. It was up to me to find people to help me move stuff to the new place and make sure everything was packed and ready to go. All he worried about was his PC and his desk. Hell even my brother and I had to put my bed frame together because he hadn't done it.

He was an asshole everytime we had to go back to the other house to help clean up too and got mad once because my mom asked us to bring something and he didnt bring it.

But things settled down mostly. I hated how i was expected to do almost everything but it was manageable.

Then he wanted to move and find a new job, which was fine, he sorta?? Let me know what kind of jobs he was applying for and where. But when he got an offer, he accepted it without even talking to me about it. The job he took he was going to start in two months and I had less than a months notice to pack all of our shit and leave not only that but they didn't offer relocation and he was going to be getting a little less in pay. We had less than a month to move Which again- he barely helped with. All the sorting through shit and packing was left up to me once again. I ended up leaving almost all of our stuff behind because I couldnt fucking take it with me to my moms.

I gave Virginia a shot and i was more miserable than I've been ever. I was expected to do everything. EVERYTHING. I decided to go to California. I had originally hoped that in doing so we could save some money and he could use the money we saved to get stuff for the apartment to make it more comfortable.

Which didnt really happen until April. After being with Family in Cali for a while, seeing how well lucian was doing and stuff, I honestly didn't wanna go back. I went back to sign the lease and then again a couple months after my aunt died because of how tense things were at the house, i figured it'd be a last ditch effort to save things.

But no. I tried to tell him how I felt. I tried to tell him what bothered me, why i was so depressed. I told him I felt lonely, I told him I felt like i was expected to do everything. And it always. always felt like I was talking to a wall

I told him I wished wed go out and do things more, that itd be nice and I might meet people. He wanted me to meet people online first and then meet them in person. Which totally defeated the purpose of getting me out of the. House to socialize, and even if indidnt make any friends then at least I got out and was productive. But he doesnt like leaving the house.

I told him countless times that I felt like it was unfair that he expected me to do so much work around then house with minimal help, but nothing changed. He thought helping more meant cleaning the kitchen and making easy dinners.

And while I appreciated it in wished hed help more with the living room too, or the laundry, or anything else literally. The most recent time I brought it up he managed to turn it around to finances and told me that he doesnt spend money on himself because he spends it all on me and Lucian. He told me that if i didnt get what I wanted I essentially acted like it was the end of the world.

Granted yes, I'd get disappointed and my displays depending on my mood or whether or not the item was seasonal or limited edition varried from minor to being a little mopey (i really tried not to be, most of the time i was usually more upset about the ungodly cost than anything.)

Then he invades my privacy, not once but twice I found out. This son of a bitch logged on to my discord, TWICE.

The first time he did it was a day I cleaned the whole apartment. Like I vacuumed, shampooed, cleaned the kitchen counters the best in could, did the dishes, took out the trash, wiped counters and the stove, did several loads of laundry, picked up in the bedroom.

As soon as he got home i went to my room and I guess thats when he did it. He logged onto my account on the computer and opened discord, and went through my messages.

That's literally the only reason he asked me for a divorce. Was because he had seen I've been thinking about it for a while.

And then for whatever reason he did it a second fucking time.

The irony? The first time he did it?? If hed just fucking come to me, I was gonna ask him for a divorce myself. But then he did it, and while it was a huge relief at the time, it would have taken every ounce of willpower not to slap him if I had known then that he was only asking because he went through my messages.

We managed to work things out to maintain some civility for Lucian's sake, and i was okay with that! I was glad we seemed to have cleared the air a little bit.

But then I thought about it more, he never actually apologized to me for anything. He never actually apologized for the messed up stuff he did or said, and he doesnt think he did anything wrong by going through my messages. In fact he thinks he was justified because "I needed to know how they really felt."

And then when I admitted some things I did or said was messed up, he didnt even actually own up to his bullshit. He had to lump me in with him

"Cant we bith admit that we both did and said fucked up shit?"

Like?? That's whaT I WAS JUST DOING. WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING THIS WHOLE TIME???

Then on my way to CO I find out??? He tried to say he does everything himself??? Inwas looking into the requirements to fly with my cat and dog because originally i was going to fly to Colorado. I dont remember which airline I checked, but I checked the requirements for the airline he was gonna send me on, and then he tells my step dad hes tired of doing everything himself.

WHAT???

I looked it up!! I thought I was gonna fly with a certain airline so that's who I fucking looked it up for!!! And hes trying to say he did all the footwork HIMSELF?! If I'd known he was considering another airline I WOULD HAVE LOOKED THAT UP TOO, BUT I DIDNT. Then He has the audacity to say hes tired of being the only one doing all the work??

Are you fucking kidding me????

No, nuh uh. Fuck him. I dont think I hate him surprisingly but FUCK IM LIVID.

I should by all rights hate his fucking guts, but dont, if I did the sight of him would send me into fits of rage as would the mention of his name.

But God damn I am PISSED OFF at him. So fucking pissed off. I mean for all I know hes hacked my account and is reading this right fucking now.

If you are Alex, FUCK YOU for everything you've put me through these last couple years.

fuck him. I don't feel bad for him in the least. I know I'm not fucking perfect, but I fucking tried. I gave him more chances than he fucking deserved. He held me to unfair standards, he expected me to clean house in 2 hours or less, expected me to cook every fucking night, constantly tried to tell me my mental health is harder for him than it is for me, tried to tell my family that he does all the fucking work (okay I cant make phone calls but I can do fucking research you fuck), made me out to be the bad guy constantly, doesn't own up to his bullshit, put me through all this and EXPECTED ME TO APOLOGIZE FOR GOING TO CALIFORNIA, went through my fucking discord, and countless other bullshit.

Yeah no I don't feel bad for him. Not at all, he had plenty of chances to work with me to avoid all this and he chose to ignore it. The only attempts seemed to be when I wasn't with him.

I have a lot of baggage and issues, but I fucking deserve better than that.

If hes in emotional turmoil because of what happened. He brought it on himself. I fuckin tried.

If me not feeling even a little sorry for him makes me a bad person

Then get me my fucking demon costume.

#blue.txt #long post #negative #ask to tag #I JUST REALLY NEEDED TO GET THIS OFF MY CHEST

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dr-gloom · 6 years ago

Text

Kintsukuroi

A continuation of Fall Apart, loooong overdue! Thank you everyone for being patient with me while I worked up the focus and motivation to write this. I hope you like it as much as I! <3

Fandom: Sander’s Sides

Pairing: none

Words: 1,207

Summary: Virgil is trying to recover from his soul-shattering breakup with Roman, reminded that the world won’t stop for his depression. He learns to pick himself back up and gains a nugget of wisdom from an unlikely source.

Tags/Warnings: depression, Human AU, recovery, basically vent-fic-part-2

A/N: so yeah, just like Fall Apart, this is based heavily on real life. The only real difference is that I never met a Patton.

Read it on AO3

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like what I do? buy me a coffee or GoFundMe

@hungry-red-panda @neonb-fly @chemically-imbalanced-romance @unbefuckinglieveable @punsterterry

To say that things got better would be a complete fucking lie.

In the remainder of his shitty summer vacation, Virgil only really left his bed to use the bathroom or eat when the hunger became unbearable. He slept a majority of the time, turning his back on the sunlight shining through his blinds in a mocking reminder that just because his world was falling apart, that didn’t mean the real world was. He was numb. And when he wasn’t numb he was heartbroken, or angry. He had no one to talk to about it because Logan wasn’t the most empathetic person out there and Roman still had him blocked.

Roman.

Virgil couldn’t stop asking himself what he’d done wrong. How had he screwed this up? He thought they were doing great, he thought Roman loved him. What was he talking about in that last message?

He wished he could just ask.

When he felt up to it, he brought up Tumblr on his phone to scroll through it and distract his mind. That became rather hard when half the posts were about people venting their problems and talking about how depressed they were, though. He remembered back when he was new to Tumblr and had just followed all of these blogs, how happy and dumb and funny everyone was. Now they all just logged on to use Tumblr as a personal diary.

He deleted his blog the next day.

Eventually he has to force himself out of bed to go to his fall classes. No matter how low he’s feeling or how much he hates himself he’s always been a good student, and it wouldn’t stop just because he was alonealonealone a little depressed. His classes gave him plenty to focus on to distract himself, making his mind numb, empty of free thought and only capable of answering homework questions or performing basic tasks like showering and eating.

Logan still messaged him at least once a week to ask how he was doing, if he wanted to hang out, or just to make sure Virgil was still alive. Virgil hardly ever responded, and when he did it was short one- or two-word answers. He didn’t want to talk to Logan. He didn’t want to talk about what happened and how he was doing and how his thoughts were cognitive distortions. He knew Logan meant well, but he just… He didn’t think he could deal with that right now, so he was all but avoiding the other, claiming to be swamped with school.

It wasn’t a total lie; this was his last semester before fieldwork, so he’d needed to shove as many classes into these sixteen weeks as possible. Eighteen units, the absolute max they would allow, and even though that usually meant homework all day every day, he still found himself with some free time. God, he was so bored.

So he made a new Tumblr.

He felt bad abandoning the friends he’d made on his old Tumblr, but he wasn’t interested in the same things anymore and they were all so depressed and…. He just. Didn’t need that.

He spent an obsessively-long time trying to think of a new URL. For some reason, he found himself cycling through the nicknames Roman had given him over the months.

doom-and-gloom? Nope, taken.

dark-stormy-knight? Nah. Damn.

surley-temple? Taken.

jack-smellington? Taken.

Taken.

God dammit.

Virgil groaned, rubbing his forehead tiredly. Without thinking too much of it - it was probably taken - he types in ‘dr-gloom’.

Not taken.

He grins for the first time in weeks as he finishes going through the mandatory bullshit to set up his blog and find people to follow. Sure, he looks up some of the people he used to follow and follows them on this new blog, but he doesn’t tell them who he is.

This is a new beginning, after all.

He’s already decided that this blog will be more positive. He’ll be the positivity he wanted when he was hurting. It’s… out of character for him, but that doesn’t mean it can’t become a part of him. By being others’ positivity, he can be his own too.

As he finds more people to follow and his dash is filled with posts, something inside him - a gut instinct he’s learned not to ignore - tells him to message people. Not everyone; specific URLs stick out to him and he can’t help but feel like maybe the universe is telling him who needs his help. It’s stupid, and maybe a little egotistical, but after he sends the messages he feels…. Good. He sends good morning and good night messages to ten strangers-turned-family every day, regardless of how he feels inside, and little by little he finds that he’s not as depressed as he used to be. His daily ritual actually picks up his mood as he reads the responses from people and talks to them through PMs.

He does this for nearly two months before someone randomly messages him one day. The URL reads ‘pattoncakes94’, the icon most likely a selfie of possibly the cutest, bubbliest person Virgil has ever seen.

pattoncakes94 hey! just wanted to come say hi! i love those messages you send to people, it’s a great idea!

He takes entirely too long trying to come up with something to say that doesn’t sound too cheery, hyper, or creepy.

dr-gloom uh thanks

He face-palms. He sounds like a jackass!

pattoncakes94 oh! sorry, i should probably introduce myself, huh? im patton (he/him/his)! im 24, i looooove cats and puns and cookies and sweaters, and im a taurus!

Virgil snorts. Oh my god, this guy’s a dork.

dr-gloom thats cool uh im virgil 20 he/him/his i like music, nightmare before christmas, and deathnote and im a leo i think i dont really do the astrology thing

pattoncakes94 oh, thats okay! its just kinda fun, i dont actually believe in those daily astrology things what kinda music do you like?

The next few hours go like this, with the two men chatting about anything and everything. Virgil didn’t even know how two people could talk this long without the conversation feeling strained or boring. He hated small talk, but for some reason he found himself enjoying talking to Patton. The conversation flows seamlessly, Patton filling any possible pauses or lulls with his own little anecdotes or questions.

Over the next few weeks, whenever he’s in a bad mind space Virgil messages Patton. Patton never asks what’s bothering him or pressures him into opening up. Instead, he willingly provides a distraction and chats with Virgil until he’s laughing in the comfort of his room, heart light and mind clear. His favorite conversations were the ones that were the most random, but led to Virgil learning something new.

pattoncakes94 hey, you ever heard of kintsugi? also known as kintsukuroi

dr-gloom no…? what is it

pattoncakes94 it’s this japanese thing, it’s so cool! basically they take broken pottery and fix it with gold, silver, or platinum instead of throwing it out!

dr-gloom why? sounds like a waste of time

pattoncakes94 because they saw the beauty in those flaws in the cracks and breaks because just like people, it’s the blemishes that make them beautiful

#sanders sides #sanders sides fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #roman sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #remy sanders #deceit sanders #emile picani

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