#i gave myself emotions
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John talking about Arthur:
#I’m in my malevolent brainrot era because I accidentally re gave myself emotional damage#malevolent#malevolent podcast#arthur malevolent#malevolent john#malevolent arthur#malevolent john doe#malevolent memes
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melencolia
#jena#not gonna put it in the dragon age tag cause you can barely tell but... know in your heart#im channeling the emotions veilguard gave me#(watching companions act close with each other and not rook) that's fine i'll just draw myself as a bitter angel in the corner*#*i dont even mean that as a criticism - i love bitterness and rejection in art so it's a win for me#mostly just drew this to try new brushes... i think im relying on the same steps too much and it's making art less fun#so im trying new things#my art#art tag
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OH!!!!! HAVE YOU CHECKED THE CYBER CAFÉ DUMPSTER by any chance? there HAS to be some leftover cake there!!!! i heard there was an event recently!!
#Sorry if its a little choppy i was starting to feel really guilty LMAOO#and im short on time a bit#BUT#its done and i cant even bare to look AHA#maybe i enjoy being evil.. a little..#BTW THIS IS NOT A BAD REACTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARENT BEING PUNISHED!!#i mean besides this being crushing but ill elaborate give me a little#[you've got mail!]#spamton#spamton g spamton#deltarune#deltarune spamton#deltarune chapter 2#yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy#hes grateful. he really is. um. but theres a mix of emotions that was just maybe a lot.#I feel like he needs this a bit#sorry but not sorry him CRYING in front of you means a lot if you decide you want to pick it apart and understand it a bit more aha#i havent really made him like cry or anything because he REALLY hates it especially infront of other people and it just wasnt enough yet#uh and i was a little nervous about doing it until someone else did it and it was like a 'ohh okay... so i CAN do that...' moment and i#gave myself permission
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hey listen to this normal track
#BEGGING you to listen to the whole thing without skipping ahead for maximum emotional impact. PLEASE.#gerard way#my chemical romance#mcr#<- relevant#i was literally in bed listening to millions and this came to me and did so much damage i had to make it real.#i gave myself a stomach ache making this#talks
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'When', not 'if'
("I'm not a romantic" I cry and scream before dropping the most sickening thing i've written to date. Blame @stunie because i did tell her i would write the most ume thing ever and maybe this is it. The title in my docs for it is 'Fucking disgusting' but i figured i better not title it that here because I'd be seeing it in my notifs lmaoo)
SFW/no cw unless you hate fluff
When you wake up from your nap, one of your slippers is gone, and there's a blanket on you that wasn't there prior. Looking at the clock, it's been about an hour since everyone had left your apartment once your birthday party ended. The day as a whole had been chaotic, your boyfriend shoving you out the door with a note to go see Kotoha.
The note took you farther than that, though, as it seemed Umemiya created a whole scavenger hunt for your birthday that had you running into all of your friends, having dessert at your favorite cafe, and eventually ending up at your shared apartment to find that all that time spent around town was a distraction so that he could set up the space for your party. After it had ended, you were banished to the couch because princesses aren't allowed to help clean up their own birthday parties, which had you huffing and falling face down into the chicken shaped pillow affectionately called Mr.Clucky.
It was a product of your boyfriend's endless cycle of hobbies when he took up sewing. A little lopsided and overfilled with stuffing, you complained to and into Mr.Clucky with your face pressed into him. Apparently, he was soft enough to fall asleep on because before you knew it, you had been drooling on him the entire hour. Prying yourself off the couch took more effort than was almost worth it before your eyes fell on the reason you were so tired to begin with.
Hajime smiles and hums looking at your bleary eyes. "Good morning sunshine, I was just about to take you to bed," he says, folding a dish towel over a chair. You toss off the blanket and grab on the slipper that fell under the living room table before padding up to him. Dipping your hands under both of his arms to lock them together behind him, now your face is in his chest instead of the chicken, which is entirely preferred.
"Don't wanna go to bed just yet," you muffle, sinking even deeper into him when both of his arms wrap around you in support. He smells like dish soap and birthday cake, and you turn your head to hear the heartbeat in his chest.
"What do you wanna do lovey? You know I'd give you the world if you asked," you can hear the rumble of his voice in his chest with your pressed ear. He's cheesy, but half asleep, you feel just as much, if not cheesier.
"I have the world if I have you, they're one in the same. So just you is more than fine." Your eyes are closed, but you feel him shiver a little. "I wanna dance with you, though," you say, voice still soft and kinda raspy from sleep.
"Dunno if I can top what you just said even when I propose," he chokes out a laugh, or at least you think it's one. He shifts his hold a bit and starts leading you both in a lazy sway that starts near the toaster and ends next to the potted plant at the back door before starting over.
"When? Not if?" You tease him, a hand going to scratch the nape of his neck lightly.
"I'll never meet another you, so I'm pretty set on When."
"I'll say yes." Because you will. You can't imagine a life where you wouldn't.
"And I'll still cry when you do." You can tell he's crying now because it comes out shaky and his hold tightens a bit, before you lean back, stopping your impromptu waltz. Both of your hands come up to cup his face and look at his teary grey eyes before cooing at him.
"You big baby! Save those tears for When please. You'll be congested and sniffley all night if you don't stop." You start cleaning off his face with your sleeve, but he stops one of your hands and starts peppering your palm and wrist with small kisses. "I think I'm ready for bed now. Princess's orders," you say, dragging him towards your bedroom. You'll have to figure out tomorrow just how soon When is going to be, but for now you can hear the slow thumps of Hajime's steps as he follows behind you, squeezing your connected hand. It's not pressing in the least, you think, because it feels like there will be plenty of tomorrows too.
-----
When you wake up in the morning, it takes you an hour to realize Hajime had put the ring on your finger while you were asleep.
It takes you five minutes to run through town in your pajamas, barefoot to find and full on tackle him in front of the place he was about to get your breakfast in.
And it takes about two minutes of unintelligible blubbering on both your parts before anyone understands what is going on.
No one timed it, but if they did, it would've taken less than ten minutes for the whole town to find out via texts, calls, and yells down the streets and through windows that you're engaged.
#umemiya hajime x reader#umemiya hajime#mari writes#also em this is because of YOUR sweet ume fic as well YOU'RE my inspo#the most romantic thing /i/ can think of is slow dancing even when theres no music its always been that way#though the song i gave to this one is one summer night by the danleers just like...thats what should play when reading the dancing part#also i watch too many turner classic movies so its like....watching an old old romance movie#i couldnt reread it more than twice sorry if the grammars bad i was cringing the entire time because while i think this is good#im allergic to emotions and i made myself cry during it#one day id like to write something small on the scavenger hunt he sent us on cause i think it'd be cute#he might do something similar when he proposes but shhh#i want him to drop the ring off on my finger when im sleeping like the tooth FAIRY OH MY GOD I COULDVE ENDED IT LIKE THAT FUCK ME#WAIT I CAN WRITE IT AS A QUICK SIDE#ok im back i wrote it
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Utopia protecting and worrying about Astral
#I often think about this#something something about Utopia being literally created by Astral and being the only Number who stayed with him when he reached the Earth#and being not only the symbol of the relationship between Astral and Yuma but also their most loyal monster and ally#Their relationship is so important to me#Utopia always stood up for Astral#and when Astral said to him to go and help Yuma Utopia didn't do it immediately#Utopia looked at him worry because Astral would be completely alone against 96#but Astral wanted Yuma safe more than he wanted himself be safe and I think that Utopia knew that#aside from all that the battle scene between Utopia and Black Mist is one of my favorites#it's so cool and those two are my favorites Numbers so I always love rewatching it#and once again I'm making myself emotional over Astral and Utopia#but that last look! The last look that Utopia gave to Astral before trying to go#and also the fact that Astral sent Utopia to Yuma knowing that doing that would left him defenseless#and yet he did it anyway because helping Yuma was more important than his own safety#I already said it and I will say it again because I love them#astral zexal#astral yugioh#number 39 Utopia#yugioh zexal#yu gi oh zexal#ygo zexal#zexal
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seven sentence sunday
Tagged by my beloved @walkinginland, thank you! 💜 I promise we are getting there for Seaside, I have almost 7k words written, but I was in NY for comic con and then I got sick, so I just haven't had a lot of opportunity or inspiration to work on it. Getting close though!
With a strangled sigh, Claire glanced around the parlor instead of attempting conversation. Her eyes fell to a framed photograph on the end table nearest her and she reached for it. “Is this Jamie?” she asked softly without looking away from it. “Aye, and our older brother Willie.” The beaming faces in the photograph were still young boys, but Claire could see the recognizable tilt of Jamie’s head and the sweetness of his smile in that younger face as he gazed up at his older brother. “He worshiped Willie growing up.” Claire didn’t miss the fondness that had seeped into Jenny’s tone. She caught the other woman’s gaze and smiled. “And you did, too.” Jenny’s gaze dropped to the baby, feigning distraction, and swallowed thickly.
no-pressure tagging my darlings @forgetmenotsassenach17 and @frasers-of-my-heart and anyone else who has something to share!
#seven sentence sunday#beside the seaside#i gave myself emotional damage in this story by having Willie and Robert grow up with their siblings and Jamie and Jenny still lose them 😭#and now my chickens are coming home to roost with the lallybroch chapter
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I've been reading Exodus lately and I've just gotten to the portions where God gives the first commands to the people via Moses (twice), and then goes on to give detailed instructions about the tabernacle and how it should be built, and I'm just... we think art is unimportant?? we think things only mean as much as their functionality?? we so easily fall into the trap of believing that beauty means nothing, that it's cheap and only worth whatever mindless distraction it brings, that it's barely more than a cheap sensual thrill, that buildings should just be practical and plain and cheap, that everything should be functional but ultimately disposable, that paintings and dresses and mugs and curtains and carpets are just pretty but have no real value, that beauty is fleeting and vain and therefore shouldn't be thought about too much, if even looked for at all... we fall into these traps so easily, and we forget that there are chapters upon chapters of painstakingly detailed plans to build one portable worship tent, and those plans have been handed down through thousands of years of human history, because beauty and art and skill in craft is important
#I have to go get ready for work now but I will come back to this#and don't even get me started on the parts about God calling specific craftsmen *by name*#he called them!! by name!!! he said 'this man is good at his job. he creates beautiful work. he will build my temple and make it beautiful'#and even more--God inspired him!!!! it was a calling of GOD for him to create beautiful carvings and tapestries and candlesticks!!!#look even if you're not jewish or christian or religious at all you have GOT to see what it means that all these incredibly detailed plans#for building this tent-temple are extremely important#because even if you don't believe in God and don't think that this is all significant bc he personally gave the instructions#and then helped preserve this record of them so we could still read them today#you do have to see how important they were to the people of that time who first wrote them down#and the extreme care that was taken to record all of those detail#AND the fact that it's been preserved for so long and we can still read all the care that was put into creating this incredible piece#of artwork and worship they made#gurt says stuff#I just. gahhfhhfj. I'm feeling emotional about chapters of the Bible that I can't even fully force myself to pay attention to#bc there's so MUCH and I'm bad at visualizing this stuff and I tend to zone out while listening to it#but the fact that it IS that much!!! that there SO MUCH DETAIL and it goes on for SO LONG that I even struggle to pay attention!!!#that this was THAT IMPORTANT to the people who wrote it and to God!!! as an artist and someone who has always cared about art#this means so much to me ok#christianity#bible verse#bible thoughts#exodus#art#theology
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hiii I need your advice if you're willing to give it!
i am in high school (senior) and I have a crush on this really cute boy. he's super awkward and shy and we've only talked maybe three times? I don't know how to strike up a conversation with him! what do I do?? </3
Please approach! The answer to that is so easy. Always always alwaysss approach if you want to. Either he’s totally into you and it’s the start of something, or he’s like sorry I’m not interested and then it’s a little awkward, but either way it’s a valuable learning experience bc then you learn that rejection is not the end of the world. I’m still 10000% sensitive when it comes to rejection, but I’ve definitely put myself in enough situations to where it’s so much less of a blow now
Tbh the truly hard part is what to do after the fact. Like sometimes people do like you, but it’s only to a certain point so then they’re only half in and it’s confusing and the mixed signals drive you crazy . And sometimes circumstance truly prevent someone from going all the way w you (and that’s the more rare scenario lmao) but either way pleaseee don’t obsess. Just take any confusing signals as a hard no. I wish I had an older sister to tell me this. Confusion = no. Do not put yourself in a perpetual situationship .
It doesn’t matter if it has nothing to do w you and everything to do w personal stuff he has going on at home. And btw this goes for every person ever, not just guys. And my slightly harsh take is if someone truly valued you, they’d respect you enough not to be confusing about where they’re coming from. I’ve always gone wrong in being like “he does like me but xyz” and it’s like even if that’s true and he’s head over heels, if he still can’t commit to you then he still can’t. So don’t obsess and just pivot your attention elsewhere . I am so serious. No situationships!!
#Btw I’ve learned that emotional situationships are totally a thing too#Like where you’re not dating but you’re still emotionally held hostage by someone#Literally don’t do that to yourself no one is worth it enough#Gave you a whole essay bc from 18 to all the way now at 22 it has been situationships back#To back and I want u to avoid the unnecessary mental strife I subjected myself to 🩷#Mixed signals are always a no regardless of intention or feelings blaze it
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She just wanted a friend :(
#the amazing digital circus#tadc#pomni#gummigoo#tadc spoilers#the amazing digital circus spoilers#josh art tag#okay but this ep was really interesting in the subtle ways it showed that pomni didnt think of the others as friends#like i suppose it shouldve been obvious#but i think myself and many other members of the fandom knew from the pilot that they would end up friends and we realized the potential#and then combined with the time between eps#i kinda forgot that they werent really friends#pomni actually spent most of the pilot separated from them in exit maze hell#and was Going Thru It the rest of the time#but this eps pomni dynamics with the rest were super interesting#esp how she wasnt really receptive to ragathas friendliness#and then the ending!! how a funeral of all things gave her comfort and hope!#i think that showed her that these truly are real people#not just like part of this weird digitap hell like caine#and that even if she abstracts she will be remembered#and people will be sad about what happened to her and mourn her#the scene of everyones (minus jax's) hands grabbing her as she falls makes me so emotional 🥺
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Man, these past few days...so many thoughts. About my life then, my life now. What I missed. Thoughts about what I'll never have. And what I want to have.
#gilmore girls#this episode is another one where it's like#lorelai had this huge horrible thing happen#and instead of making it about her she turns the whole situation into an opportunity to do something great for rory#she takes rory to the college of her dreams and doesn't give away even the slightest hint of wistfulness#when it triggers all these thoughts about what she missed and what she gave up to be rory's mom#rory comes out of a college classroom so excited about 'college is gonna be amazing; i can't wait; i love college; i love harvard!#and lorelai just makes space for rory to be giddy#and tells her how amazing she is and how she blew everyone in the classroom away#without ever once letting on that she has painful emotions about her own missed opportunities#she makes this whole trip into an opportunity for rory to celebrate and revel in her upcoming future#even when lorelai's own intended future has just collapsed!#anyway i'm learning to make gg gifs myself so i don't have to put my bookends thoughts on other people's sets#but this one really is the most bookends vibes#vague bookends thoughts#*
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Asking because I’m extremely curious about this, how did MonProm’s writing get different over time? I remember you saying that the lore and characters feel different, and that it's missing sincere character interactions, too. I know almost nothing about the lore and I’ve only seen a few people mention the characters, so I’d be interested in a rundown of what aspects you think got worse in the series
I wouldn’t mind a very long response since I’m not that active in the fandom, I need to catch up on what happened
sorry for taking so long to answer this! i kinda waffled on it for a long bit, mainly because i started doubting myself again, and whether or not this was me simply overreacting or being tinted by nostalgia or simply being extremely picky and choosy in what i like (the last of which is true, i seldom get into fandoms at all for this reason and stay away from most popular media, but i wasn't sure if it applied here). i've posted about it already, but i'm in the middle of a psychotic episode where i can't feel a lot of pleasure to begin with + most things i do experience ending up solidly in the "very bad" category, so as you can imagine, i really didn't want to mislead and check that i was actually in objective reality.
as it is, this is also when a lot more screenshots started to be posted in the monster prom tag, and that helped me bridge the gap back into returning to the games themselves and feel like i was making a more accurate judgement. if you're one of those people who have been posting screenshots, i sincerely thank you, and i appreciated seeing you in the tag greatly.
for those not in the know — i've been in the monster prom fandom since it first released, prior to even the first additional ending to be added (the "Punch the sun" ending, and i recall the minor fandom drama that happened at that time due to it). my impression of monster prom is very much influenced by this, as what got me into the first game was the fact that the characters genuinely seemed to care for each other and were friends with each other (not merely tolerating each other's presences nor dressing it up, they sincerely thought of each other as friends and were open about that fact), on top of the wide variety of small details and statements that, if taken at face value, could create compounding complexity in the lives of each and every character and had wider implications for their lives.
no, they were not necessarily explored nor even necessarily "real", with so many conflicting events and statements, but i liked this too, because it meant a wider flexibility in what you could imagine, helping to create a more tailored experience for everyone who thought about these characters. this was what i liked about the early fandom too. what was baseline "canon" was so vague and minimal that you could have wildly different interpretations of the same characters' histories and relationships with each other. you would have radically different perspectives on what the world itself looked like, what it was like, that there wasn't really any wrong answers so long as their personalities remained the same. this is where you got the old headcanon of polly and liam being childhood friends who knew each other as humans, or that the world of monster prom was post-apocalypse where humanity itself had gone extinct or only existed in tiny pockets, or my personal headcanon that both monster and human society existed right next to each other and had minimal crossover for petty cultural reasons. this was also prior zoe-as-ro, and there were wildly different interpretations of zoe's personality, with most going for a far more disquieting creepy-cute than the deep nerd we got.
this is why you get stuff like the timeloop theory, where everyone is repeating the same weeks leading up to prom over and over, and are perhaps vaguely aware of it but broadly unconcerned. this is also why it felt like the joke that, the characters were still in high school but were all fully legal adults with most in their 20's, best landed, because it was absurd and strange and didn't quite make sense, but the world itself was inherently absurd and semi-malleable to begin with. realistically, i felt like everyone understood it was making fun of the trope of having adults play teenagers in american sitcoms and wildly casting outside the age range, but for more in-universe explanations it wasn't any different from the way that you would have a large, dramatic ending in which everything changed, but then you'd restart and everyone would be right back at the beginning with nothing different, or even having conflicting events in the same run. it was a dream-logic that fit with the tropes and, thus, diagetically made sense.
to be clear, i don't mind canon having a set, well, canon on which it refers back to itself. i don't mind expanding that or including more things which are set in stone. but there was a perceivable shift in how the games handled this over time, becoming a lot more... bitter, it felt, towards all of these different branching ideas and concepts that, yeah, the people making them knew wouldn't necessarily be "canon" because "canon" already liked to contradict itself so much. most people weren't even sold on any one idea, and there was a much greater sense of enjoying and appreciating all the varying ideas people would come up with even if you personally didn't share them. making the characters be out of character was the real crime, because then it didn't diagetically make sense in the same way, didn't wholly fit.
(again, this is not to say fanon didn't happen and characters weren't smoothed down into a simplified personality that fit these varying fan-interpretations instead of the game itself. certainly damien love/lust was just as bad as it had ever been, and everyone loved to mangle his character into a more stereotypical "bad boy with a heart of hold" all the time. but it certainly felt less set-in-stone about it than it does now, with any deviation from the norm being considered strange and odd and even broadly shunned from the wider fandom.)
all of this is setup for establishing what the writing, lore, and characters felt like in the earlier days. the characters were the strongest part, with their relationships to each other being equally as important. the lore played it fast and loose and was far less interested in setting anything in concrete because that wasn't the important part. the lore wasn't the important part, which was what made it all the more intoxicating to think about, all the more fun to play with.
montrip is easily the biggest offender when it comes to setting everything in all-or-nothing terms and demanding absolutism from the world. broadly i blame the hitchhiker conversations for the worst of it, but i think ultimately the way they handled the entire premise of the game is where this problem stems from. it's not really an exploration in the same sense that you might explore the first game, discovering different perspectives and different people with different relationships to each other. it's an exploration in the sense of a sequel that over-explains the monster, that takes the most boring option out of all those that were possible and floating around and settles on something that was blatant, obvious, typically rejected not because of how novel it is but how trite and par for the course it is in the rest of the genre.
yeah, okay. humans know nothing about monsters and there's a "monster dimension" that exists separately from the human dimension. there's no crossover between the two of them. of course there's a big grand-scale fight between the eldritch powers that zoe used to be a part of, from which not only are slayers the main organization against them, but also the merkingdom has some horse in this race too. it's an urge to make things so universal in explaining them, in revealing connecting threads which unite everything that's ever happened in here, that makes the worldbuilding and lore immediately much more boring than it ever was before.
and it didn't have to be this way! nothing in the first game contradicts any of this too explicitly (see the above, the first game loves to contradict itself), and i would even be happy if this was basically canon but never stated or confirmed to be the big overarching everything going on underneath it all. i believe you should probably know these things about any world that you create and have them in the back of your mind. the difference is that you can know these things and keep them in mind, even focusing on things where its very relevant, and still not reveal them. this is why you have lore bibles, after all. every horror writer knows exactly how their monster works and the full underlying reason for everything that happens, but that doesn't mean the audience will see it or possess this same information too, and leaving it intentionally obscure will make far better stories.
which, this is bad enough, but it wouldn't be the breaking point for me if this was all there was.
but the worst thing of all has to be the slow decay of the very same characters that sold me on this world, this lore, this game in the first place. monster prom is nothing without the characters in it. it's a dating sim, it has nothing but characters to get you to play, and liking these characters are the entire reason anyone would pick up monster prom in the first place.
and the first game pulls this off extremely well. it's all in the tagline: be your worst self. they are, indeed, all terrible people. yes, even that character that you just thought of right now. they all have points in the game where they commit atrocities, where they kill or hurt people, where they do inexcusable things that could not be ignored in a more serious setting.
but that's the point. i think there's something very powerful in creating a character who not only do you love and love their personality and the way they interact with the world, but who also are inapologetically terrible, and to have the humor and the charisma be so good that you don't get bogged down in the "this is awful". likewise, it never feels the urge to really go out of its way to justify what's going on. this is not to say theres no discussion of if someone "deserved it", but usually there's still the sense that the joke is on them, that this is still an extreme reaction specifically for comedy and not necessarily something that can be justified. you can have damien set leonard on fire and have it feel earned, without prompting the needed reaction of what it's actually like to watch someone burn to death.
this is what sets the prank masterz ending apart from the rest of the game, and really establishes it as the first real "bad ending". because nothing that you do or happens in the prank masterz ending is any different from anything else that happens in any other run. you summon evil beings from other dimensions as a throwaway gag on how visiting one location raises your stats. you kill other people and damn them to terrible fates. you watch as body horror happens. the only difference is that, in the prank masterz ending, the laugh track doesn't play.
the rest of the game and the writing echoes this philosophy, this careful interplay of tropes that keeps everything tongue in cheek and yet sincere enough to make sure emotional beats still land when they're needed. the characters feel true to themselves and their own emotions, even when the world is extreme and excessive, when everything else runs on comedy logic.
this is also what i noticed failing first as time went on.
like i said, fanon has always existed and there's always been very specific ideas as to what characters are like in the same way fanon always flattens down characters into the same tropes over and over. scott is stupid and innocent and doesn't know what sex is. damien is violent and hot and too cool for anyone else. miranda is the idiot girl character. repeat over and over and over until you get sick of it.
but it's been an issue as time has crept on that canon has started to approach fanon and began to merge with it. now, scott is so innocent that he can't even curse. polly starts being mean to her friends and saying things that would be very hurtful to hear. the merkingdom isn't really super evil and fucked up, it's just miranda that's like that. they become simpler, easier to digest, streamlined for social media posts and mass-sharing. they become less and less subversions of existing tropes and moreso just another example of them, something else to add to the collection, not their own individual stories.
even further from this, what more complex traits they had are now stated and not shown. polly is stated to be smart and clever in a way that her party girl persona doesn't imply and to be sincerely rather down to earth with the people she cares about, but we seldom ever see this anymore unless its the game specifically trying to make a point about it, in which case it won't let her do anything that implies cleverness and moreso will just outline it in the narration. vera is stated to care for people in a very genuine and heartfelt way, but seldom will get a chance to do so, and every opportunity for her to do so to their faces is missed while she will just outright state it later. it does not feel consistent, it does not feel like any of these are intended reads of their actions. it feels like the devs have something they want to do but no idea on how to actually do so. and forget it if you want these traits to manifest in small ways that show up in unrelated moments and scenes.
the dialogue becomes harder and harder to tell between each speaker, if you are just looking at what's said and not at the pictures attached to it. the characters' distinct voices have been eroded away, so that they speak more and more like each other, relaying the same terms and ideas in the same words. perspective becomes a suggestion, instead of a must.
this is something that started back in monster camp too, as all of the endings in that game felt ultimately the same as every other ending. it's very hard to place or define the full reason why, why there feels like there's no emotional stakes nor investment, why everything feels moreso like selecting different coats of paint and trying to find all the different ending pictures rather than being interested in exploring the characters as characters.
stranger yet, the series that started with the tagline of "be your worst self" has experienced a kind of... softening, for lack of a better word? what i mentioned about being able to handle the balance between terrible people who do terrible things and the light tone of the game starts to change, as abruptly the same characters who were down with violent murder in the first game start to lose their nerve, acting more and more on more typical morality. it's one of those things that feels like it's starting to damage the tone, as abruptly it's not as absurd as it used to be, demands less suspension of disbelief which could buffer and support the rest of the setting on it. there's even a part in one of the endings in montrip which involves current-polly and current-scott looking back on their monprom selves and reacting in horror at how violent and careless their pranks are, in a way that fundamentally felt like it was undercutting and disparaging all the things that felt fun and made monprom what it was.
which is odd, really, because more and more i feel like the characters in these games like each other less and less. the friendships and genuine enjoyment of each others company that brought me to this game in the first place has gone. now they don't mention each other as much, don't care for each other's feelings and reactions as much, aren't as willing to support each other. they are more and more found on their own, relied on their own, seem to seek out contact and interaction with their own friends less and less. it feels like they're all separating out into their own worlds, but also feels like they wouldn't willingly want to interact with each other if they weren't already forced together by some other outside contrivance.
if anything, i'd compare it to every other dating sim out there, where you, the player, are the most important person in these characters' lives, and they only feel ambivalent or antagonistic towards every other character. which, again, is not why i picked up monster prom or why i liked it so much in the first place.
and it's because of this that it feels like the current state of the series has to focus on its increasingly weak worldbuilding and lore, trying to form a more serious foundation without character relationships being so tightly bound together, without the characters themselves being more developed and rich, without an aspect of absurd humor to rely on.
more and more i've noticed monprom has to rely on referencing other series to make itself funny and create humor, which, again, it's always done. it was just easier to ignore back then, if you didn't know what was being referenced, because there was always more going on in the exact same scene to bolster it and give context clues as to the setup and punchline at play. it feels like the current games are much more dependent on you knowing pop culture references in order to have any fun with it, and i'm someone who, again, is very picky in what i like or what i'll seek out. i'm not interested in a stream of references about other things that i would much rather be doing than playing through a game that feels like it hates that i like it at all, when i could, again, just be engaging with the thing that takes itself seriously and knows what it wants.
#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#monster prom#asks#vanillabeenflower#this is. so long i am so sorry.#and its still not my entire thoughts because i have so many thoughts#this is an unedited ramble tbh and im very sorry for that#i have more complaints like#how fucking snide and condescending the narration is to its own characters#which it already had but gets even worse in the later games#which is why despite loving aaravi i dont want to play moncamp at all#where a character says they like something or feel something and the narration has to be so. sarcastic about it?#like how i mentioned about how it feels like how its looking down on them as people#instead of whats probably the intended read which is#more jokingly calling them dumb in an affectionate way like how you might do with friends#and ofc theres the whole miranda rant#i hate what theyve done with the merkingdom and i HATE adrien as a concept i wont lie#just. cool. this female character is too stupid to count as a lore character. we obviously need a MALE character to fill in instead#we cant just have miranda talk about this or center any of the other female characters#and how they feel about this and whats going on for them#no we need to make up a new man to talk to instead#im. im still really bitter about it i wont lie.#like i said i could go on and get way more specific about it#i just feel like any and all emotional weight to this has died and the characters are more and more obviously actors on a stage#for your own self gratification rather than their own people living their own lives#this is so bitter and i really shouldnt put this in the main tag#i am so sorry everyone who will see my rant. but my peace must be made.#dont worry im already asking myself if im just making all this shit up myself#what if some of us liked that the characters were so mean to the player and had no qualms about aggressively rejecting us#because it gave some illusion of them being able to make their own choices and decisions in what they wanted
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im so
im so .. insane about him right now
I LOVE HIS BIG PEEPERS . HIS BIG PEEPERS WHEN HES SO DEEP IN THE ZONE !!! ITS ALMOST EERIE LIKE AUHGDJJFGGH
look at him hugging his bag. look at his sproing.
i love!!!!! when his eye goes
BOKUTO YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#YOU NEVER SEE THE CHARACTER HYPERFIXATIONS COMING IS THE THING#THEY JSUT HIT YOU OVE RTHE HEAD OUT OF NOWHERE#haikyuu#bokuto koutarou#i was gonna go to bed like. 2 whole hours ago and instead i gave myself a headache looking at my phone bc i need to see bokuto right now or#i will fall apart#forgive this incomprehensible post i need to get my love of him out everywhere. ranting on discord is not enough. tumblr must know as well.#if i was coherent and had a way with words i would write an essay about him as a character but alas art remains my only outlet#bokuto jsut makes me SO emotional??? its so weird idk. i will see him and immediately want to cry bc im so overcome w feelings.#hes jsut so good#hes so so mcuh larger than life that it makes me eant to cry like hes so and also so but also so and so like its crazy damn i cant yknow
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tptm ending
#nurse parallel honest to god gave me some hope for myself thumbs up emoji so yeah i cried#i love dropping intense emotions about things ive never talked about before on my blog <3#tptm
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Can’t help falling in love with you by Elvis Presley with Marco and his s/o who dies of old age
It’s the song they got married to and the song they die to :)
-💧
You end this ask with a smile you villain! Demon!
T-T no that’s so sad 😭 oh man especially in an AU where Marco does t die he just bursts into flames and he’s twenty or ten or whatever but he’s reborn and gods and seas how does he get rid of this curse?
(I see it being a one-time effect of the fruit personally, not true immortality, but unsettlingly close.)
Ahhhhh gag! (I mean GAH! Not gag- stupid phone)
You know what, NO.
No, I’m not leaving it as that kind of sorrow today. TAKE THIS AND LIKE IT.
You’d been teased, at first, the difference in age between you and Marco, but you didn’t care. As months and years had passed, as your twenties and his forties had turned into your fifties and his seventies, it mattered not one whit.
He’s lived a hard life, and the phoenix fruit takes it toll on his stamina. He may be only 70, which is by no means young, but he’s honestly closer to 90 with how often he’d pushed beyond his means. The whole island mourns when he dies.
And is flabbergasted when his body catches fire on its own, bursting into the most beautiful flames you’ve ever seen. From under the pile of ash a young man stands up, Marco no more than 30.
He’s a bit confused himself, but trial and error finds you a young version of himself without a drop of Devil fruit power within him. He can swim, but no longer can he soar.
Marco is elated! You dance, make love, live a quiet life on the quiet island as you had been for years.
And you grow old. Together. Again.
Fifty becomes sixty, becomes seventy. You miss his flames from time to time, but your fifty year old husband has more pep in his step and draw hot baths for you, brings you tea. You’re nearly eighty, maybe a little older, when the end draws near for you.
He’s over sixty, by true rights over a century, and he sits with you with a warm smile, the edges drawn only a little in sorrow. You’ve had more decades of time together than you ever believed possible.
And you’ll die before him. As everyone else has.
He regretted not being able to outlive you, after carrying that burden for so many others, but that was, perhaps the last gift his Zoan fruit gave him. Being able to keep you comfortable, safe, and loved for all the days of your life.
Being able to protect you from the solitude that would have followed. His pretty bird, after all, should never have to sing such a sorrowful song.
He will bury you, but his broken heart, and his extra years, will not carry him much further. A year later the village buried him beside you, grave set at the foot of the great mountain.
The giant Phoenix carved into the rock, looking over the valley and to the sea beyond, that glints teal and gold in the right light, from rocks heavy with veins of pyrite and pale blue quartz - stones precious in a way, but not worth the effort to mine into the mountain - watches over the village ever after.
Sometimes the air and wind hit the shore and crags in a way that the sweet trill of music, some birds that are only heard and never seen, and dances along the valley. Old locals call it the guardian’s song, and younger villagers tell of a sweet romantic tale, how hearing the song with your sweetheart will ensure a long life together.
#quin answers#quin muses#reader insert#x reader#anon asks#marco the phoenix#💧#I went and gave myself emotions
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Still no craft updates on account of I feel Bad* but I did get like half a beanie crocheted this weekend? I also have a bat that's haunting me. In that there's a bat design I desperately want to turn into a plushie not in that I am being literally haunted by a bat. As far as I know I am not haunted by a bat but to be fair I'm not confident I'd know? *my heart rate got high enough that made me cough but my asthma was flaring up enough that cough launched me into an asthma attack, which raised my heart rate even more, so basically I used my emergency inhaler and then was on the floor for a while. Feels bad! Do not recommend. I'm okay though just tired
#the person behind the yarn#the reason my heart rate got that high is that my pulse pressure was very narrow#which is. you know. bad.#so I finally gave in and took an extra dose of my meds (as my doctor has advised in the past)#what is probably happening is that I reached the point of stressed where my body couldn't cope#(I'm on long term steroids so I need stress doses if I get too stressed)#but! because acute stress can trigger an allergic reaction (yay MCAS) I tend to kinda...shunt stress off to the side#and come back to process it when it's less like. urgent? immediate?#when it no longer feels like it will trigger an MCAS flareup if I acknowledge the feeling exists#and I do go back and process those emotions! I just have to get a little distance first#and the work stress lately has been so unrelenting (combined with the like...general world news stress)#that I have been ignoring my own stress levels so hard I genuinely did not think I was stressed#or that I needed a stress dose of my meds but uh. I was wrong!#I was wrong. Good news is now that I know I should be good in a day or two#doc said three days for stress doses and today was day one#bad news is narrow pulse pressure combined with asthma attack feels Very Bad!#very bad indeed took me like 20-30 minutes and two different kinds of medication before I could talk normally#without having to pause and catch my breath midsentence#every time I start thinking 'you know maybe I'm not really disabled maybe my health stuff is under control'#it pops up like a jack in the box like surprise! it's the same thing again still here! the meds just hide it most of the time#but it's still there :) lurking :) when I least expect it :)#...I think I might buy myself another sticker or two. something to look forward to coming in the mail
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