#i fucking blink and boom its been 4 years

[sk3l3t0n444]

yk the depression is hitting hard when you dont even have the energy to watching you favorite movies :(

[viktoriaashleyyx]

This is a pro Tamlin, anti Rhysand self insert revenge fic. All characters belong to SJM, but she wasn't treating them right. Tam x reader, Tam x Rhysands Sister (OC), First person narrative. This will also reference Elucien and Neris in the future but we aren't there yet. Contains slight violence, poisons, broken bones. Also profanity. I'm not sure what else to tw if I miss something let me know. This is my first fic. I honestly don't know how to find word count, but it's roughly 4 pages on word docs. Criticism welcome. Rhysands Sister is back and she's pissed. Rhysand gets his ass whooped and Tamlin gets shown love. Enjoy.

Ch 2. Ch3 Ch4 Ch5 Ch6 Ch7 Ch8

Chapter 1:

I crash landed on a stone surface. A balcony of sorts? It was well built if it was, considering how long I've been falling, I'm shocked I didn't crash right through it. I know now that making a deal with the gods is a lot like making a deal with a damn djin. 

“Who goes there??” A booming male voice barked. I could hear swords drawn. Fuck where am I? My ears were still ringing, vision blurred, and chest heavy from the impact. I blinked my eyes open to find a winged male looming over me. Another illyrian? Have I finally made it home? Fuck, then that means I am in the night court. Damnit, 7 fucking courts in Prythia and I just happen to land here. At my brother's court. 

This ones expression shifted from threatening to complete shock as his gaze landed on my eyes. “Sky?” 

At my brother's court and at his fucking house, Freya has a sick sense of humor. I slowly sat up, ignoring the hand the illyrian extended to me. 

“Your wing!” He gasped. So thats what that throbbing pain was. My wing seemed to have been snapped in the fall. “You need a healer, go get Madja” he commanded the other brute. 

“Don't bother” I dismissed, standing up slowly. I pulled a small glass vial out of my pocket, a healing potion, I always kept a few on hand, never know when you're gonna need it. I downed the bitter red liquid as I've done a thousand times and grabbed the dagger off my hip. I put the handle in my mouth and bit down on it as I grabbed my own wing and straightened out the bone. I held it right for about a minute until the potion worked its magic. It hurt like crazy but I was careful not to show these idiots, the fear and shock on their faces was satisfying if I am being honest. 

“I'm guessing you are Azriel and Cassian, though I can't tell which is which” I admitted, trying to seem just polite enough to leave. 

The one next to me spoke first “I'm Azriel, he's Cassian” okay, Azriel short hair, Cassian long hair “this is Mor and Amren and she is Feyre, High Lady of the Night Court” 

“So my brother is dead?” I had hoped my excitement would come off as concern. 

“No, no, they rule together, as equals” Cassian spoke

“Got it” this conversation is dragging. I need to leave. 

“It's so nice to meet Rhysands sister, we thought you were dead, I'd heard so much about you” Feyre gushed, “Rhys is out on important business at the moment but he should be back soon.” I had no use or interest in this small talk. 

“How old are you?” I looked at her as if to study the young thing in front of me. I was never good at pleasantries. I spent a good while in isolation and I tend to just blurt out the questions on my mind. 

“I am 21” Feyre replied sharply, yep I angered her with my lack of class. 

“Ew, 21 years? Ugh, my brother always did like them unreasonably young.” I'm just gonna keep going with it, hopefully she'll throw me out. 

“My age is not a disability” Feyre snapped. 

“It's adorable that you think that.” I'm in too deep. Oops. “Anyway, I am sorry I crashed into your home, I had little control, but I would like to leave now.” 

“You will apologize and bow to your high lady.” Cassian growled. Azriel stepped in front of the door. 

“She is not my high lady, I am not a citizen of your court, in fact, I am starting to feel like a prisoner.” It's not lost on me that I have bore the title of Queen, multiple times. In both cases I have dismantled the monarchy entirely, setting up a system in which the people vote on who leads them. Her title meant nothing to me. I bow to those deserving, not the one who rely solely on birthright. But she doesn't need to know this. I have more important things on my mind than to argue with a child "I will request one more time, you move and allow me to leave.” 

“Or what?” Azriel snapped. Unmoving. 

I did not want to show this much of my hand just yet, knowing this magic is not native to Prythia. But, if they want to twist my arm, so be it. A swirling purple circle opened up under me and I fell though, closing it quickly behind me. Portals were my favorite magic to do, in more cases than once it ensured my freedom.

Landing softly on my feet, I took in my surroundings. Cool air, rolling green hills, and the sounds of birds chirping in the distance, the Spring court. I was finally home. I eventually spotted the manor I spent so much of my time at as a child. Mother didn't make me train with the illyrians as she did my brother because she feared the treatment I would receive, also by the time I came along she had befriended the ladies of the other courts. We would spend weeks here at times, the children would play together and the mothers would discuss adult things we didn't care about. One of those things being alliances, and what better way to encourage an alliance between Spring and Night than by an arranged marriage.

I didn't mind them encouraging me to play with the cute blonde shapeshifter. He was kind and silly and only a couple years older than me. The other kids, mainly Autumn boys, were rough and volatile, and I just had no interest in what they considered fun. When I would get flustered by my wings knocking things over and getting in the way, the youngest Spring boy would remind me how beautiful they were, or how powerful they made me. The few times he would get a chance to practice his fiddle, I would dance and twirl, even if it was just the arpeggios. He was the 3rd born, and I the second and a girl, they didn't expect either of us to become High lord. 

The manor was about a mile away, I shot up another portal to the door, I was tired after all and, if I'm being honest, a little excited to be back.

When I reached the door it was broken in half and wide open. I creeped inside, cautiously. It looked to be abandoned. Dirt and dust coated the walls and floors, priceless artifacts shattered and books thrown from the shelves. I noticed claw marks in the furniture. “Please just be alive, after everything, I can’t be too late.” I whispered to myself. My heart sank as I looked around. 

Further into the dilapidated manor, I heard muffled voices coming from the kitchen. “Get out.” a tired weak growl. I ran to the entrance and just as I rounded the corner I saw my brother's boot kick in the chest of.. Tamlin. He began spitting up blood. 

“WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?” I hissed at my brother. 

Rhysand whipped around towards me, Tamlin looked up from the floor, eyes wide. 

“You're alive??” Rhysand darted towards me and I shoved him to the ground, rushing to Tamlins side. I knelt down beside him, held his head up from where he laid on the floor and pulled another glass vial out of my pocket. 

“It'll be bitter but swallow” I commanded gently. He didn't argue, he took the healing potion and I kissed his forehead as I laid him back down gently to address my brother. 

I stood tall. Nothing but pure rage in my violet eyes toward my brother. I always hated how much we looked alike. “THIS is the ‘important business’ you told your wife you had to take care of?” 

“I thought he killed you, he hurt my mate.” Rhysand admitted, no remorse. 

“And I finally make it back home after 300 years in exile to find you kicking mine” I state through gritted teeth. 

Rhysands eyes narrowed “your what?” It was obvious he wanted me to retract my statement, not going to happen. I didn't waste my time away, I knew I was more powerful than all of Prythia, I had to be, in case I had returned to Amarantha still terrorizing the place. 

“You heard me.” I maintained his gaze. In a split second he lunged for me and I reached my hand out into the small portal that appeared to my side. I grabbed one of the curved blades I was gifted by the warriors I previously trained with. These blades were specifically enchanted to drip poisons into the wounds they create. This one? Bloodbane, or as Prythians call it, “Faebane.” I slashed him across the face in a controlled move, just enough to leave a scar and allow the poison to sink in. 

He screamed in pain and looked back up at me. My eyes fell entirely black and cracks formed across my face as I spit my curse at him, lifting up his chin with my sword to make him look me in the eye “IF YOU, OR ANY OF YOUR LACKEYS, ENTER THE SPRING COURT BORDERS AGAIN, ALL OF THE AIR WILL BE DRAWN FROM YOUR LUNGS, AND IF YOU CANNOT GET OUT BEFORE YOU PASS OUT WE WILL FEED YOUR BODIES TO THE PIGS.” I relaxed, my face returning to normal. “Now get out.” A portal opened below him and he fell, leaving him only halfway up the steps to the House of Wind. 

I turned my attention back to Tamlin, he had sat up, the healing potion having done its job, looking up at me with a million different emotions on his face, shock, fear, concern, confusion and relief. I sat down next to him, draping my legs over his. He embraced me like I was going to disappear any minute. “You're alive. Or I am dead, I do not care as long as I have you in my arms again.” he sighed as we just sat there on the floor. 

I awoke the daemati powers I hardly used as I pressed my forehead to his. A gentle knock on the walls of his mind, and he allowed me in. I shared the memories I held dear for all these years, of us playing in the fields of Spring, the days he would spend with me in the gallery his mother gifted me, watching me paint, the mischief we would get into and the giggles we would share. His face relaxed into a soft smile as I kissed his cheek.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

@ladythornofrivia asked to be tagged❤️

[whumpfessional]

Consequences

Alright, this ought to cover whumptober prompts 2 (confrontation), 4 (waking up disoriented), and 5 (running out of air). And a separate content warning for Segar. But we do get some caretaking at the end.

Anyways, here are the consequences.

CW: Slavery, minor whump, just getting the shit kicked out of them, strangulation

There was a small mercy in the fact that the boot which collided with her chest wasn’t driven by the full force of a stomp. Still, she bolted upright, blinking awake as Segar began to storm into the room, blocking the light as he loomed forward. 

Her eyes blinked rapidly, trying to clock her surroundings. For a moment, fear spiked through her that she was still in Balak's quarters, flashing back to the years sleeping at the foot of his bed.

The girl had only begun to register the pain shooting across her back as a heavy hand gripped her neck and dragged her up the wall. Eyes wide, she struggled for air as her hands grasped uselessly upwards out of instinct. Her mouth hung open, body instinctively gasping for air. Her lungs tightened and her chest burned as the hand's crushing grasp constricted around her throat.

Segar’s eyes only betrayed fury, all four narrowed in rage. She felt herself lifted off the wall before slamming back hard, knocking again the dull metal. 

Her neck snapped backwards only to be knocked back again, scant air remaining driven from her lungs.

His words punctuated each slam, slow and burning contrasting the ringing in her ears. 

“You. Didn’t. Polish. My. Boots.” Segar growled before letting go, allowing her to fall the two feet back limply to the ground.

The girl heaved, pressing her forehead into the cold ground in desperate attempt to stop the word from spinning. Her head screamed, the back of it with the sharp burning ache of the impact. 

“You useless piece of shit!” The final word was punctuated with a boot slamming into her side, this one with the full force of a grown Batarian behind it. 

Today was a day of few mercies. 

The girl tumbled to her side, curling into a little ball as she struggled to breathe. Every breath rasped as she tried to take slow breaths, to not let the trembling panic take over. 

She had fucked up. She had been so absent after the dinner and she had fucked up and forgotten to polish the fucking boots and now she was going to have to pay for it. 

She really didn’t want to. But begging just made Segar more mad. He hated hearing her voice, he said it made him want to strangle her. 

A boot pressed down on her right shoulder and the girl screamed. The boot pressed down, right over the cuts that had been made the night before and she can’t stop herself. Her body spasms on its own accord, trying to escape the weight.

There is only burning pain in her mind, eyes forced closed as conscious is forced out. 

“Stop.” A new voice booms over her stifled whimpers, Segar’s cursing. A long moment of silence before the boot lifts slowly. There is a squeal as the girl hears Segar turn around on the heel of his boot.

She forces herself to breathe, trying to keep it as quiet as possible. There is a wheeze that wasn’t there before, a feeling of something stuck on her right side. 

It would be nice to fall asleep, her spinning head said to her, trying to pull her towards darkness. 

Raised voices passed through the ringing in her ears.

“Are you telling me what to do? Really? You? The one they sent down here because you can barely even handle a fucking gun?” Segar’s voice cut through mockingly. She could hear the sneer in his voice. 

“I think you should go.” The other voice clicked in her mind. Ghorek. 

Oh Ghorek. No. Don’t do this. She imagined reaching out with her arm, saying something but her body wouldn’t respond. All that came out was a slightly louder wheeze. 

Boots came closer and she violently flinched as a hand grabbed her chin, forcing her face up. “Really, Ghorek? For this?” Segar shook her head and the dizziness doubled. 

The girl tried to open her eyes to grab her bearings, to stop the world from rolling over and over again. The hand’s grip twisted as her eyes opened, forcing her face over to look at Segar from where he crouched beside her. 

He shook her head again, watching her eyes rolling cloudily, unable to find purchase. “What did you do to him, kra’tash? Did you manage to make a little friend?” He pinched her cheeks inwards harshly, pushing in painfully before dropping her head back down. 

The girl let out a whimper as her head hit the ground, nausea wrapping around her. Her brain felt like it was being stabbed in multiple places, pain radiating from everywhere. 

The door slid open and there was a pause in the footsteps leading out, “Ha.” Segar’s voice pierced through everything, “Can’t wait until the captain hears about this one.” The doors hissed closed. 

The girl allowed herself a sob. A heart wrenched, desperate sob. It was too much. Oh god, god it was too much. Another sob clawed itself out before she could pulled together the strength to stop it. 

She wanted to go home. She wanted this to stop.

She wanted her mom.

There was no defence as the third sob wrestled out and they began to flood out, rapids and hiccups uncontrollably tumbling out into the silence of the room. 

A hand laid on her left shoulder and she whimpered, curling closer in. “Pl-please, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I c-can’t take it-“ Sobs wracked through her, interrupting any words. 

“Shshshhh,” Ghorek’s voice soothed from above as his hand rested gently. “It’s over now.”

It wasn’t over. He didn’t realize it wasn’t over. Her chest heaved but it hurt, it hurt to cry. It hurt her ribs and her back and her head but she couldn’t stop. She shook her head from where she lay, curled tightly inwards. 

She felt the presence leave, the hand lifting away. Good. He should get out. But instead a hand lifted under her, gently lifting her off the ground. She let out a small groan as her head left the ground, dizziness moving with her. 

The girl tried to push away from the arms but it was not long before she was sat upon her sleeping mat. Ghorek moved away while she tried to get her thoughts into one idea. 

Segar was mad. She disobeyed. Ghorek stopped Segar. Segar was going to tell Balak. It was her fault. Her fault crew had disobeyed. 

“Yo-you-” The girl stuttered out, catching herself, “s-sir, you shouldn’t do t-that.” Her voice, while a whisper, seemed to cut through the noise of the engine. Ghorek paused by the sink, where he was holding a tin cup. He turned back, walking over to set the cup down beside it. 

There was another pain killer. She grasped for it, taking it before it could be taken from her, 

“What do you mean?” Ghorek’s tones were gravelly as he stood nearby. She couldn’t bear to look up, just clutching onto the glass of water. 

The girl took a shaky sip, her mouth suddenly dry at the thought, “I can’t- you- you can’t stop them.” She shook her head. “That’s not how this works. It’s- I-I’m like a… a tool. You can do anything to your tools.”

The room was too quiet, despite the roar of the engines. The girl hazarded a chance to look up to where Ghorek stood, noticing him staring back at her contemplatively. She retreated her gaze, pulling back into herself. 

“I have a kid, you know.” Ghorek interrupted the quiet before it had stretched impossibly long. “Back home. She’s 12 now. Absolutely deadly with a sword.” A fond smile crossed his face before it was hidden away again. 

The girl sat, waiting for more. Ghorek was still again though, lost in thought. “Y-you can’t stop them.” She whispered, “you’ll just get in trouble. I-“ The girl swallowed heavily, “It’s not worth it.” 

Ghorek cleared his throat. “I should tell you off, a slave telling me what to do.” The girl flinched, steeling herself for what might come. “But you aren’t wrong. Standing back and watching though, it makes me feel sick.” 

The girl shook her head slightly. “I’m not worth it. Not with what they will do to you. Not if-“ she swallowed heavily, “not if you have a kid to get back to. Sir.” She added hastily at the end. Ghorek nodded in response, sitting back in contemplation.  They sat like that for a minute, both lost in their own thoughts. The girl’s head throbbed but the sharpness of the pain had already begun to dull. Don’t get used to this, the voice in her head reminded her as she relaxed slightly back against the wall. She let her eyes close, drifting off slightly as she tried to focus her attention from the aching across her back and limbs.

Tag List: @annablogsposts

[tothemeadow]

THE REQUEST ARE OPEN AGAINN!! AHHHH CONTINUATION OF PILLAR BODY SWAP THANKYOUUUU

‘switch ‘em up pt. 4′ / Pillars x Reader (now with the Kamaboko Squad!)

warnings: none

words: 2,243

(a/n): I just wanna thank the lovely anon that gave me the idea to this plotline; it helped a lot!

-

for reference: Giyuu/Shinobu | Gyomei/Mitsuri | Obanai/Tengen | Sanemi/Muichiro | Kyojuro/you

-

“I’m not sure I understand entirely,” Tanjiro confesses, his eyebrows furrowing. “So you’re looking for some special type of herb?”

“Precisely,” Shinobu says.

Overhead, birds chirp and flood the skies, hopping from branch to branch and competing each other with their harmonies. A delicate breeze sweeps through the area, carrying loose leaves and the crisp smell of nature. On any other day, you’d love to come back; however, considering the circumstances, you’d rather not be here.

After much discussion on what should be done to return everyone to their normal bodies, Shinobu voiced an idea that may work – finding a special herb and using its medicinal properties. It’s a bit of a longshot, but it’s not like anyone else has any other better idea. And whether the others voiced it or not, everyone is secretly wishing that this magical plant will bring a miracle.

As such, you and the rest of the Pillars take the trip to Mount Sagiri; Tanjiro insisted he tag along since he knows the area well, plus he wanted to help. Of course, this meant traveling with his two friends, Zenitsu and Inosuke. Truthfully, it’s quite a crowd you’re traveling with, but it should prove to be useful to have extra eyes searching for the herb.

“Giyuu knows this area as well, so it shouldn’t be too hard to find it!” Tanjiro chirps, looking to his friend. Although Giyuu is still stuck inside Shinobu’s body, he looks away, a light blush dusting his face. “Plus, Urokodaki-san should be able to help us!”

“Wait, that old man who used to be the Water Pillar?” Tengen questions.

“Don’t disrespect him,” Giyuu abruptly snaps. The muscle in his jaw ticks. “That is all I ask.”

At that, Tengen lets out a drawn-out whistle. “Damn, alright. Don’t tear my head off, waterworks.”

“Waterworks? What kind of name is that?” Sanemi speaks up. “I think you’ve been inside of Obanai for too long, Tengen. Your insults are starting to turn lame.”

“Fuck you,” Obanai mutters.

“It’s not my fault Obanai doesn’t possess a flamboyant sense of humor!”

With a sigh, you watch on as Tengen, Sanemi, and Obanai start bickering. Frankly, you don’t know why they’re even putting in the effort. Everyone is stuck in a situation that they don’t like, so what’s the point?

Beside you, Zenitsu wrings his hands, an uneasy expression crossing his features. “Uh… Kyojuro? Wait, wait, sorry – (y/n)?” You hum in response. “Are all the Pillars this… tense? Like, normally?”

“Heh. Well, not really. Sanemi’s always got a stick up his ass, and Obanai’s just naturally edgy like that,” you tell him. As you look to him, it strikes you as odd to have to look down at him. You’ve otherwise grown used to the height difference, but it still takes you aback sometimes.

Zenitsu snickers. His unease melts away, his shoulders visibly relaxing. “When you put it that way, it sounds just like that moron Inosuke.”

“Oi! Who the fuck are you calling a moron?!” Inosuke barks.

Quirking an eyebrow, Zenitsu shoots you a bored look. “See what I mean?”

“We’re here!” Tanjiro exclaims.

Having been distracted from the short conversation with Zenitsu, you’ve completely ignored your surroundings. Cursing yourself internally for being so careless, you look ahead, taking in the sight of a small home with an even smaller garden next to it. So this must be Urokodaki’s home, huh? How quaint.

“This doesn’t really look like much,” Muichiro voices. Shifting his attention to Giyuu, he cocks his head. “So this is where you were trained?”

Giyuu nods stiffly. The look on his face – Shinobu’s face – is, well, vulnerable. You haven’t seen him show so much emotion before, and it’s a bit startling. If you’re being entirely honest, it looks as though he’s ready to throw up everything that’s inside his gut.

“It’s just as I remember!” Tanjiro chirps. “It’s nice up here, don’t you think? The air gets thinner from here on up, so please be careful when scaling the mountain.”

As if on cue, the door to the house slides open, revealing an elderly man with a tengu mask adorning his face. The air about him demands respect; it’s more than obvious that this very man was a Pillar, and a strong one at that. You watch on as Tanjiro and Giyuu step up towards the house before dropping into respectful bows. Tanjiro’s movements are much more fluid, more comfortable. Giyuu’s are more… wooden.

“Tanjiro, my boy!” Urokodaki greets. Ushering Tanjiro closer, he greets the young man with a hug. “…Who’s this fine lady with you?”

Tengen laughs.

“Urokodaki-san, it’s me,” Giyuu grumbles. “Giyuu…”

Although you can’t see Urokodaki’s face, you have a pretty good idea of what it’s like. The man falls silent, glances from him to Tanjiro, then he scans over the group behind him. Sure, you can’t blame him for being skeptical; a random swarm of people showing up to your house unexpectedly is bound to raise some questions. However, these are all Pillars he’s dealing with. This isn’t something to take lightly.

“Urokodaki-san,” Tanjiro begins, “we need your help. We’re not entirely sure how, but all the Pillars switched bodies with each other. It’s been like this for a number of days now, and we don’t know how long it’s supposed to last.”

After another moment or so of silence, Urokodaki sighs and crosses his arms. “Listen, kid, that seems a bit… much, don’t you think?”

“It might be some sort of Blood Art!” Tanjiro rushes. “Please, Urokodaki-san!”

Again, another sigh. “So everyone is in another body than their own? Haven’t heard of an ability like that before, but that doesn’t mean it’s not possible.” Nodding in Shinobu’s direction, he says, “So, that’s Giyuu’s body, but it isn’t him?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” Shinobu tells him. “Believe me when I say I don’t want to be in Giyuu-san’s body more than I have to.”

“Ehhh?! What’s with all the talking!” Inosuke bursts. “You guys said you wanted to find a plant, not talk to some old coot!”

“Inosuke!” Tanjiro scolds, but he’s too late. In a blink of an eye, Giyuu practically materializes right before Inosuke, his fist colliding with Inosuke’s gut. There’s a loud groan of pain as Inosuke drops to the ground, his hands clutching onto his stomach. To the side, both Zenitsu and Tengen break out into fits of laughter.

“I told you not to disrespect him,” Giyuu grunts.

“Ohoho!” Kyojuro booms, just as loud as always. At this rate, he’s going to blow out your vocal cords before you can get them back. “How loyal, Giyuu! I’m impressed!”

Rolling your eyes, you break away from the group, opting to join Tanjiro. “Urokodaki-san,” you greet, giving a polite bow, “it’s a pleasure to meet you. Listen, I know this is a complicated situation, but we really need to find this plant. It’s crucial that we do.”

Urokodaki hums. “I know you – you’re Rengoku Shinjuro’s boy, aren’t you?”

“Huh? Well, technically – but I’m not Kyojuro. I’m (l/n) (y/n), the Wild Pillar.”

“You’re not? Figures. This whole “switched body” conundrum is making my brain work in ways it hasn’t worked in years.” Urokodaki waves a dismissive hand at you. “Whatever. If all of you are willing to look for such a plant, feel free to scale the mountain to your heart’s content. I’ll get dinner started.”

“Thank you so much!” Tanjiro chirps. After Urokodaki slides the door shut behind him, the two of you turn back to the others, smiles plastered on both of your faces. “Everyone – it’s time! Let’s turn you all back to normal!”

-

After hours of searching, no one has come up with anything. Granted, a vast variety of edible plants line the mountain – all of them useful in one way or another – but it’s not the dreaded silva you’re looking for. Shinobu said it was vine-like, with delicate leaves shaped like bells. The only you found worth of any interest was watching Inosuke eat almost every mushroom he could find and crack open acorns like they were nothing.

Soon, the sun began to dip below the horizon, painting the sky with hues of peach and berry. The view was simply breathtaking, and you had to stop to take it in for a few moments.

“It’s always been like that,” Giyuu says quietly. Stopping next to you, he gazes at the setting sun, a wistful gleam in his eyes. “Most of the time, we were too busy training to watch it, though.”

Now that you think about it, Giyuu has been acting weird ever since arriving. Call it intuition, but you’re almost positive that he was feeling guilty about something. And he said we instead of I, so that only confirms your suspicion. Glancing around, you imagine a younger Giyuu descending the mountain, panting like crazy in the thin air, narrowly avoiding the numerous traps Urokodaki set up. If he experienced anything like the pain roaring in your back and sides right now, you’re amazed he dared to set foot back on this very mountain.

“Thinking back to simpler times, huh?” you ask, voice soft.

Giyuu scoffs. “The training was far from simple, but yeah. Things were a lot more different then.”

As if acting on its own, your arm slings itself around Giyuu, tugging him closer and holding him against your body. With him in Shinobu’s body, he’s so small, his head nestled against your chest. At first, he tenses up, but then slowly relaxes in your hold. Ever since switching bodies, you’ve noticed Kyojuro’s personality starting to bleed into yours. Hell, even his body is trying to one up you.

“I miss him,” Giyuu whispers.

Your heart drops to your stomach at his tone. “…Who?”

“Oi! Are you two just gonna stand there or are you coming back down?” Sanemi snaps.

Muttering a curse under your breath, you pull away, but you keep a hand on Giyuu’s forearm. “You’re helping me down, got it? This mountain gives me the creeps and I don’t want to get rammed by another damned log. Seriously – how did Urokodaki-san even set them up?”

Despite the saddened glint in his eyes, Giyuu manages to crack a smile.

-

The inside of Urokodaki’s house is cramped, but it’s also very homely. Scattered around the living area, each person more or less sticks to themselves, too much in pain to engage in lively conversation. Shinobu treats to the wounds, making sure bones are intact and intestines didn’t take too much of a beating. The only ones completely unaffected are Tanjiro and Giyuu, but that much is obvious.

“So what now?” Mitsuri asks. Still in Gyomei’s colossal body, she’s probably one of the Pillars that’s had the most trouble adjusting to her new form. “We’re not going to give up looking, are we?”

“I didn’t think it was this rare,” Shinobu admits. “Perhaps we were looking at the wrong spots on the mountain? It’s possible.”

“Take a breather before springing back into motion,” Urokodaki says. Sitting before the hearth, he absentmindedly prepares some tea. “Think, plan, then go about your business. A mindless game of hide and seek isn’t going to produce any results.

“Mmph! Mmph!” Nezuko agrees (or you think so, anyway). You’ve only met her a handful of times outside of her box, but you enjoy her company very much.

“Wait,” Shinobu suddenly says, snapping upright. “Urokodaki-san, what’s that you’re grinding up right now?”

Setting down his mortar and pestle, Urokodaki busies his hands with plucking apart wildflowers. “It’s silva. It grows right out here in my garden.”

At that, Shinobu’s draw drops. “By the gods-“ She facepalms, then, and groans. “That’s the herb we were looking for! You’re telling me that it’s been down here the entire time?!”

“Why didn’t you say what you were looking for?” Urokodaki says. “Could’ve saved a lot of time.”

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” Sanemi curses.

“That wasn’t very flamboyant of you,” Tengen chimes in. “I agree with Sanemi – this is bullshit.”

Urokodaki shrugs. “And how is that my fault? You’re all Pillars, are you not? Shame on you for being unobservant.”

“Urokodaki-san, please,” Tanjiro says.

“Alright, alright, fine.” In a couple of minutes, he prepares the tea as planned and pours it into a number of ceramic cups. “Since you’re all on my ass about it, drink up.”

“Uh, should we really be drinking this…?” Zenitsu squeaks, staring down at his own cup.

“Stop being a pussy!” Inosuke cackles. Tipping his head back, he downs his tea in one go.

Everyone more or less follows suit, taking sips of their own tea. As you set your own cup down, you feel the beginning of a warm, pleasant sensation in your lower tummy.

“Hey, Shinobu?” Tanjiro asks. “Is the herb supposed to make you feel sleepy?” At his words, Nezuko slumps to the floor. One by one, all the others drop like flies, yourself included.

Some time passes before your eyes crack back open. The inside of Urokodaki’s house is dark; from the crickets chirping and an owl hooting nearby, you quickly realize that it’s nighttime, and it’s probably late. With a groan, you sit up, dragging a hand across your face in the process. Wait… that’s not your hand, and it’s not Kyojuro’s either. Squinting through the darkness, you’re able to make out slight details, but it’s enough to make your heart sink. The herb didn’t work.

You’re in Giyuu’s body instead.

[sweethugsandhoney]

hanahaki disease pt 3

summary: hanahaki disease- a disease where the victim of unrequited or one sided love begins to vomit or cough up the petals and flowers of a flowering plant growing in their lungs. which will eventually grow large enough to render breathing impossible if left. it ends when the beloved returns their feelings or when the victim dies.

a/n: i decided i’m going to be writing a fourth partt because i write too much lmaooo. lmk your thoughts and thank you so much for the support and comments i’ve been getting!

pt 1 pt 2 pt 3 pt 4

“spencer stop!”, my laughter filled the room as spencer’s fingers kept tickling my sides. i mentally cringed at my laugh, trying to close my mouth but failing. spencer’s actions stopped as he hovered over me, “are you going to say yes now?”. i shook my head no with tears in my eyes, spencer’s hands returned to my side. “okay stop stop stop! i’ll watch it!”, i said quickly.

“why are you crying?”, spencer asked concerned, his beautiful eyes staring into mine. i bursted out laughing as i clamped a hand over my mouth, trying to muffle my laugh. “i’m not crying, my eyes are just watery from you tickling me”, i managed out. “hey, don’t hide your smile from me”, he said grinning as he pulled my hand down from my face. his words made my heart burst. i groaned as i sat up from my position on the couch, my sides hurting from the torture they received.

spencer got the remote and put on ‘doctor who’. he put his arm around me as i cuddled into his side. this is wrong, i thought. he just thinks of me as a friend but then he acts like this around me. i felt spencer’s fingers tracing random shapes on my side. my chest tightened and my breath quickened. i felt like i could pass out, i never wanted this moment to end, i felt pure bliss in his arms.

unfortunately it did, that happened three months ago. i realized that night that i was in love with him, it wasn’t just feelings anymore. that was also the night the plant started growing inside of me. i spent the night at his house, baking cookies and watching doctor who together.

i had decided who i should put on my life support form. the noise of my footsteps climbing up the stairs filled the silent hallway. i cleared my throat, still feeling uncomfortable although i already coughed some petals out. i stopped in front of his door, softly knocking on spencer’s door. this plant is growing for him, he should be the one to decide. spencer opened the door, opening it wider once he saw it was me.

“y/n! you came”, his excited voice said, i stepped into his apartment with a smile on my face. his presence alone made my mood so much better. “yeah, we haven’t hung out in a while”, i said taking off my sweater and putting it on the couch. “actually i have something to talk to you about”, might as well get this over with.

“what is it”, spencer replied, coming to take a seat next to me. i stayed silent for a second as i chewed on my lip. i saw spencer’s eyes glance down at my hands, my eyes following his. i was subconsciously picking at the skin around my nails, something he said i did when i was nervous. i quickly stopped doing it and cleared my throat.

“it’s about the coughing. you said that i could tell you when i was ready, and i’m ready”, i started. i exhaled a long sigh as my vision blurred with tears. “i’m dying spencer, i have hanahaki disease”, i desperately blinked the tears away. it doesn’t matter how many times i cried, the tears just kept coming. his face remained expressionless as he just stared at me.

“i know”, he finally said. “after i saw you cough up a flower, i went home and researched everything i could about coughing up flowers. i was waiting for you to tell me”, i nodded my head as a tear slid down my cheek. spencer scooted closer to me and wiped the tear off my face with his thumb. “who do you love?”

my breath caught in my throat at his last question. i glanced down at my hands, should i tell him? i looked back up to meet his eyes, my eyes glanced at a framed picture he had of maeve on his book shelf. “that’s not important”, i finally said, my eyes returning to his. “the reason i came here is because there’s a surgery i can get, but it’s risky. there’s isn’t enough research done for the surgery to be a guaranteed success”, i said pulling out the manila folder from the bag i brought with me.

i placed the folder on his lap. his fingers reached for it, opening it to the life support form dr. lee had given me. spencer reached for the x-ray scans behind the first paper, eyes taking in the image. “red carnations are my favorite”, he said softly. yeah i know, that’s why they’re growing inside of me. “spencer, i want you to be the person to decide my fate”, i said reaching for a pen from my bag and giving it to him.

“i don’t think i can do this”, he said after a few moments, his eyes looking up to meet mine. i opened my mouth to say something but was interrupted when both of our phones ringed. i furrowed my eyebrows as i reached in my back pocket for mine. ‘new case. get here asap!’, penelope’s text message read. “look you don’t have to sign it right now, just consider it”, i said with a pleading look in my eyes, “please”.

spencer nodded his head and closed the folder. we both got into our separate cars and arrived at FBI headquarters. “alright, my lovelies”, said penelope as she entered the briefing room. the whole team had arrived and was sitting around the round table. “six prostitutes have been found dead in alleyways right here in virginia. they all have an extreme amount of stab wounds and their hair has been cut off”, garcia said cringing.

“six? why are we barely being told now?”, i said, looking down at the crime scene photos on my tablet. “the police don’t really care for prostitutes that die. they kind of just slip it under the rug”, morgan said in a disappointing tone. “why is he taking their hair though?”, emily added in.

“it could be for trophies, relive his crimes. we’ll be taking the cars over there”, hotch said in his usual serious tone. we all hopped onto two different cars, three of us in each. my eyes followed the scenery we passed on our drive. ah shit, i thought as i felt the familiar itchy sensation in my throat. i started lightly coughing, “ hotch can you please stop the car”, i heard emily say . i felt the car being pulled over and i hurriedly opened the car door.

i violently coughed onto the floor, getting down on my knees. i felt the lump come up my throat, the damned flower finally making its way out of my mouth. i heaved as i felt more coming out of my mouth, hurting and stinging my throat. i breathed heavily as i pulled back my hair. i stood up on shaky legs, using the car door for support. my thoughts ran a million miles a second as i saw that i coughed up more than the other times.

the last thing i fucking need is for this thing to get worse. i wiped the blood off my chin with my sleeve, climbing back into the car and shutting the door. “everything alright, y/l/n?”, i heard hotch’s voice say, looking at me through the rear view mirror. i nodded my head as i composed myself, emily looked back at me concerned. she’d never actually seen it happen, just heard me talk about it. we arrived at the springfield police department, where they provided a board room for us.

we ran through different theories but nothing seemed to make sense. there were two different types of stab wounds. “there’s two unsubs. one is the dominant personality which goes with the violent stab wounds”, i said looking at the crime scene photos on the board. “and one is the submissive, indicating the hesitant stab wounds”, spencer followed, coming to the realization i made. after talking to witnesses and coming up with theories, we figured out the unsubs were 36 year-old connor andrews and 17 year-old jackson gregory.

we were on our way to an abandoned warehouse, which was slap in the middle of the geo profile reid created. i felt the familiar tightness in my throat as i mentally cursed myself. you just had to go falling in love with your coworker, i internally scolded myself. we arrived to the warehouse, quickly getting out and forcing our way into the building. “put the weapon down!”, morgan’s voice boomed as we found the older unsub pointing a gun to the younger one’s head.

i suppressed my coughs and ignored the tightness i felt. “no! he betrayed me!”, the unsub connor andrews said as he held the 17 year-old against him, shielding himself with him. i felt a sharp, stabbing pain in my chest. it worsened whenever i took a breath in. my hand reached to touch my chest, trying to keep my composure. i somehow still managed to keep my coughs in, even though i felt like my throat was being ripped open. the world around me started spinning as i felt myself fall.

taglist:

@squirrellover1967 @thatsonezesty13 @yomama-umbridge @arttrash02 @ladydansblanche @shellbeerocks @skrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt

[cafcaf22]

Accidents Happen

Chapter 1.

Stardew Valley's newest farmer tends to keep to herself. That is, until she bumps into the Town Doctor. Accidents Happen, y'know.

For someone who works their ass off on a farm by herself each and every day, it doesn't seem like making friends would be the most difficult task on the planet. But it is.

You moved to Stardew Valley a little over a year ago, and you're still stuck in the same horrible cycle: Wake. Eat. Feed the animals. Water the plants. Fish. Eat. Sleep. The routine has yet to change. You spend the majority of your days in the same productive, yet monotonous routine. Motivation gets harder and harder to come by, especially as the summer season ends. This coming winter does not look like it's going to be your friend.

Some evenings, when you really considered the level of your loneliness, you've thought about heading over to the saloon to check in with your neighbors. You thought about it most during the hot days when you needed a refresher after a long day. However tempting a cold glass of beer may be after working up a sweat pulling hundreds of blueberries off the vines in the summer heat, you always ended up chickening out. A common thing for you. You wanted to try- you wanted to reach out, but what would you even say? Hi! I'm the girl who's been isolated on her farm for the last 4 seasons, it's nice to finally meet you! How weird would that be? You didn't want to cause a scene - you never really liked the attention that much, so it wasn't worth the attempt.

One day during the last week of the summer, you stopped by Pierre's to check out some fertilizer for the coming fall season. As you strolled the aisles, eyeing the shelves and brushing past the baskets of the daily offerings, you overheard a lot of chatter about hanging out in the saloon on weekends. The courage you'd need to show up there on its busiest day... Hell, sometimes even Sundays had great turnouts. I probably shouldn't, you thought. If I showed up, it would make everything awkward. They don't even know me that well, and how am I supp-

Your thoughts were quickly interrupted by a body being slammed straight into your side.

"Ow!" You yelped as your wicker basket was thrown onto the ground. You immediately clutch your left side in pain and feel a sharp piercing in your lungs, as the cold floor of the shop shocks your cheek. You blink at the ground, massaging your side as you try to inhale. But that's when you realize you can't. You blink rapidly, trying to take a breath, but the air never fills your lungs. You clutch your chest, trying to feel the rise and fall, but your heartbeat is the only continuous movement. The thumps grow faster, harder. You start to feel dizzy, clutching your chest on the cold floor. I'm hyperventilating. I can't breathe. Am I having an asthma attack? Oh, Yoba. I'm having an asthma attack.

"Oh- Oh my... I am- I'm s-so sorry! Are you alright?" A voice bursts from over your left shoulder as you double over on the ground in pain, trying to find your breath. Fucker knocked the wind out of me, you thought to yourself. You could barely breathe. I need my inhaler- Is it at the farm?  The voice continued to apologize, unsure as to whether or not they should step in to aid you. You tried to take another breath, but your lungs fought hard. Fuck, I- I can't breathe, I can't-

"I- I must have knocked the wind out of you..." The voice says to himself, but you don't even register it. You squeeze your eyes shut, clutching your side and focusing on the movement of your chest. It feels like nothing and everything at once. You inhaled to feel the cool air enter your lungs, but it didn't happen. Your body felt like a deflated hot air balloon. The voice continued on behind you, mentioning something about sitting up straight and taking deep breaths. You just want it to stop, can't it shut up already? I can't breathe, I can't-

"Oh my- here! Look at me!" The voice boomed, closer now. He was above you, blocking the overhead lights of the general store. You uncurled from your ball, struggling to breathe. All that comes out are course whispers.

"Inhaler..." You managed to grunt. In less than a few seconds, a cold plastic is pressed against your lips.

"Here," the voice says gently. "I- It's mine, but it will do." The voice spoke again. Everything suddenly grew blurrier, and the voice's words became slurred. You barely made out the deep green coat that blocked all of your view, but it was soft and warm against your skin. "Breathe in," the voice said calmly. You blinked wildly, remembering that you needed to actually inhale. You take a deep breath, and taste the medication as it enters your mouth, and flows smoothly into your lungs. You finally gained some sense back. As you sat back against the aisle of the grocery store, you glanced up for the first time.

Your savior kneeled in front of you, an anxious look spread across his face. Large brown eyes took over yours, encompassing you into his with no effort at all. You stared deeply into them, locked in a trance that never seemed to end as you swam in the honey that swirled within them. His glasses sat on the edge of his nose, ignored in the face of your injury and in dire need of a cleaning. A thick mustache framed the lower portion of his face, complementing the way that his cheeks sat happily above them. He smiled the most endearing smile you had ever seen.

"I am... so truly sorry." He spoke, words of pure velvet. This voice, you thought. That's the voice.

After a few moments of slow, medicated breathing, you were finally able to speak.

"Thank you... I think?" You whispered, glancing down at his hand that held a firm grip on your shoulder. He glanced down, recognizing his steel grip on your arm, and quickly released.

"Can you breathe a-alright now?" He asked, leaning back slightly after realizing how close he had been.

"Yes," you replied confidently while fighting a cough at the base of your throat. "I haven't had an asthma attack in months... I usually keep my inhaler on me, but I guess I left it at the farm," you muttered to yourself, attempting to stand up.

"Hey, let's be careful here," he chuckled, lightly elevating your elbow and guiding you to stand. You glanced into his eyes again, hoping to have his meet yours. He seemed to avoid any effort. "I am so sorry for running into you like that... I would tell you the reason why, but it will sound a lot worse out loud." He chuckled again, running a hand through the back of his hair and fidgeting with the pocket of his pants. You raised your eyebrow, giving him a curious look.

"W-Well... I usually stand out in the garden across the pavement, and there seemed to be a..." He drew out the end of his sentence. You narrow your eyes at him, a playful smile spreading across your lips. "A... bee."

You couldn't help but let out an ugly chortle, the first of a real laugh in months. You had barely mustered up a small smile since you'd been in Stardew, not to mention the horrors of your old 9-5 desk job for Joja Cola. To be able to laugh freely in the company of someone else made you feel years and years younger; it was a feeling that reminded you of how often you got to interact with others - which was not much. The laugh quickly turned into a nasty cough, your lungs screaming at you to calm down.

"I'm so sorry- I didn't mean to laugh like that, it just kind of..." but you trailed off the end of your sentence in order to take in the beauty that was his laugh. He began to speak in fits of giggles, clutching his lower belly and covering his mouth in an attempt to stifle the beautiful sounds that escaped from his lips. His lips.

"No, I'm sorry!" He exclaimed in between giggles. You smiled awkwardly, unsure of how to continue on. You weren't the greatest at conversation, but it seemed like he wasn't either, so the two of you appeared to be comfortable in acknowledging the oddness of the whole situation. "I'm Harvey, by the way."

Your heart fluttered. Harvey. The man who saved me from asphyxiation. Well... The man who almost caused my asphyxiation.

He cleared his throat, and you realized you had been silent for a moment. You gave him your name and smiled, feeling your heart beat at the thought of finally having a friend. Maybe.

"How come I haven't seen you around at the clinic before?" He asked, eyes gazing into yours a little more intensely.

"Oh, I don't usually have any issues," you spoke quickly, trying to avoid the topic altogether. Doctors made you nervous. The ghostly white rooms. The empty hallways. The cold, metallic utensils pressed against bare skin. The intense questioning, and the way you're forced to admit things to a stranger about your own personal problems... Not a great way to spend your time.

Why would he mention the clinic? Does he- Oh... Fuck.

"So... you must be the Town Doctor?" You asked, kicking yourself on the inside for being so stupid. How could I be so stupid?

He blushed, and your heart soared. "You could say that, yes. However, I don't see many patients currently- which, I guess is something I should never complain about... I don't ever want to wish ill-will upon my patients. I don't think that's what came across, but I just wanted to... uh, make that clear," he sputtered awkwardly, attempting to save himself from embarrassment. His cheeks continued to flush a bright red. "Oh, and I understand that you don't necessarily have any... 'issues'... But feel free to come by my clinic tomorrow afternoon for an additional inhaler. Free of charge, of course. It's all that I can give you after certainly causing your episode today- which, I am still so terribly sorry for. I just really, really hate bees."

He spoke the words so quickly, you had to remind yourself to breathe as you comprehended everything he said. Mainly because you were busy staring into the void that was his eyes. Beautiful, golden brown. Heavenly.

"Of course, Doctor," you reassured him.

"Great. I'll see you tomorrow!" He exclaimed, a little too enthusiastically. You smiled in return and bent down to pick up the basket that had fallen just moments prior. "Oh, let me grab that for you-" said Harvey, beating you to the wicker basket. Your heads knocked together, clunking against each other as you both attempted to stand up. You both groaned, rubbing your heads and awkwardly glancing at the floor as if eye contact would cause another ruckus.

"Maybe we should wear helmets," you spoke softly, attempting to alleviate the awkward.

"Maybe," he sighed. "I'll see you around, Farmer." He smiled softly, and swiftly walked out of the store.

Farmer. How did he know I was a farmer?

[jaskiersvalley]

I’m honestly so here for the shifter modern au. I love it so much, and I would be so fucking down for a whole story on Ao3. (Only if you want to) And may I suggest. Wolf Vesmir pick fox Jaskier up by the scruff when his boys get to rowdy. Jaskier would be so small!

(I’m adding an anon’s request here too because I’ve been overwhelmed by asks about this ‘verse and I can’t give everyone an individual story so I’m bundling ideas together into one at times, I’m so sorry!)

These stories will, eventually, migrate over to AO3 (with a quick scan for typos - though those are kind of the norm in my writing, and my apologies to everyone about my lazy (read: utter lack of) editing). But that’s beside the point, let’s just jump straight into another installation of this story that has gotten utterly out of hand.

Parts 1, 2, 3 and 4.

There was a trend for celebrities to show off their houses. And, in a wild twist of events, Jaskier had found himself in high demand. Everybody wanted to see where he lived and find out more about his wolves too. After some discussion and a few key rules agreed, Jaskier graciously allowed the camera crew to descend on their home.

“Welcome to Kaer Morhen II,” he greeted as he opened the door. By no means was the home large and getting the regular amount of camera crew in was a bit of a struggle. They were much more used to large, sprawling mansions with more rooms than the occupants could hope to ever need. Now, they were knocking elbows in a very homely living room with soft sofas that looked comfortable and well used.

The questions about whether Jaskier lived with his bodyguards was quickly answered when Jaskier was making introductions and the most terrifying growling drowned most words out. He rolled his eyes and held up a hand with an “excuse me one moment.”

In a display of simplicity, he walked to the open window and stuck his head out, only to yell, “Oi! Cut it out you lot! Our guests are here and I know you could hear them arrive.”

After a moment there was a sheepish reply of “sorry!” and some furious whispering about whose fault it was but by the time any of the crew got a chance to look out, there was nobody out there. While the house was on the smaller side, that couldn’t be said of the garden. It was large, sprawling and with a pond, a copse of trees as well as a summer hut with throws and beanbags. Cosy in its own way and inviting for both two and four legged entities.

“Ah, Vesemir!” Jaskier pulled him close, an arm around his shoulder. “Come meet the lovely crew who will be living with us for the next four days.”

It was four very long days. Or at least, that’s what Vesemir would have said if anybody had asked him. Rules were set up quickly, there were two rooms that were out of bounds, two bedrooms. Otherwise everything was fair game. The questions were unending from the crew and Jaskier seemed happy to prattle on while Vesemir was a quiet, solid presence beside him. Sometimes Geralt would appear and Lambert had no qualms about flouting his presence. Even worse, he made it his mission to steal the big fuzzy microphone off the sound boom at all opportunities.

“Does Eskel not live with you?” The question came as everyone was sat in the garden happily eating a home cooked meal. Geralt was, as per his habits, sleeping in his wolf form, pressed flush against Jaskier’s thigh.

“Who do you think cooked?” Lambert shot back, happily chewing the end of a chicken drumstick. The bone crunched between his teeth, seemingly making him happy. “Right, thanks for the company. Got places to be.”

In the blink of an eye, he was loping off as a wolf, back into the home. In the darkness of the room, the camera crew swore they saw another pair of eyes before a hulking, dark form turned away from them, followed by Lambert pouncing after them.

From then on, it became a bit of a race to catch a glimpse of Eskel. It wasn’t that he was camera shy, he was hiding from the crew even when they weren’t filming. Sometimes someone would catch the glimpse of a tail slinking off around a corner or there was the sound of a voice humming quietly in the kitchen but before anyone could go see, Lambert or Jaskier would be pulling the crew in the opposite direction.

Curiosity grew amongst the crew about the dynamics of the pack. Vesemir seemed to never assume his wolf form and Jaskier was never out of sight of at least one wolf. The few times the crew thought Jaskier was alone, they quickly realised that wolves were predators. Just because they couldn’t see a wolf didn’t mean they weren’t in a wolf’s sight.

“What is your relationship with the wolves?” The question was finally asked and Jaskier laughed at that.

“Yes.”

“Yes?” That made zero sense.

“Exactly. See, you get it! Now, have I shown you the setup we’ve got for play?” Just like that, the conversation was twisted out and Jaskier was off and talking a mile a minute. The camera caught Vesemir hiding a laugh into his hand behind their backs.

The setup for playing wasn’t anything majors. Quite literally a tarpaulin that they could put various things on. Sometimes they made it slippery and wet, other times it was covered in sand, the edges held in place by sandbags that also acted as a crash barrier. They were definitely needed because Lambert, Geralt and Jaskier had all shifted and were haring around, playing while Vesemir watched.

“Are they your pups?”

“I raise them,” Vesemir agreed easily.

“But are they yours?”

There was a flicker of annoyance and Vesemir looked away from the bundle of fur that had become a rolling ball of yips and playful growls. Before he could say anything scathing, there was a sharp, sudden yowl of a fox in pain and both Lambert and Geralt were leaping away. The next moment a weathered old wolf was leaping into the ring and, after soft prod of Jaskier with his nose he delicately picked him up by the scruff and carried him inside.

Scrambling, the camera crew followed. By the time they were rolling, Jaskier was sat on the sofa, sniffling and holding an ice pack to his wrist, fox ears and tail still out, too preoccupied to shift properly.

“Sorry,” Lambert said, looking forlorn in the doorway. He was pushed aside by Geralt, still a wolf as he hopped up on the sofa.

“Have a bit of quiet time,” Vesemir suggested. “Jaskier, you and Geralt stay here, I’ll take our guests into the garden.”

There was no arguing with Vesemir. He led the camera crew out into the garden and they all settled in the summer hut, quietly chatting without the pressure of filming. It meant that Vesemir was also more amenable to answering questions until he shook his head with a fond smile when things returned to the topic of the pack’s dynamics.

“Go in, have a look on the sofa and you’ll understand. Go quietly.”

Tiptoeing back int the house, the crew stuck their heads into the living room and almost cooed. Jaskier was a fox again, curled up tight, nose hidden under his tail. However, he was on top of Geralt, half sinking into the thick white fur. Everybody froze when one golden eye opened and Geralt regarded them, assessing their intentions before closing his eyes again. It got even better when the large, soft body of another wolf wound between the camera crew and Lambert hopped up onto the sofa, doing a few circles before settling down, sprawling over Geralt’s haunches.

After the impromptu nap, Jaskier and Vesemir were keeping the crew entertained when vicious snarling sounded from the garden. Everyone jumped, thinking something terrible was happening. However, neither Vesemir nor Jaskier seemed worried.

“Go on, go have a look.”

As one, the crew looked and were horrified. It looked like Lambert and Geralt were in the middle of a brawl, snapping, snarling with noses wrinkled to show more teeth. They charged, slammed into each other. Lambert’s scruff was sodden with drool. It was truly terrifying and sounded like they were trying to kill each other. Even worse, Jaskier, still human, stepped closer, seemingly not bothered by the violence.

“Are you quite done killing each other?” His voice was lost as Lambert and Geralt pounced, pulling him down and bundling on top of him. It drew a gasp and even a yell of distress from the camera crew, fearing they were going to witness Jaskier be torn apart by his own wolves. Instead, they got to witness Jaskier laughing, batting away Geralt as he was intent on licking his face like an enthusiastic puppy. Lambert was bouncing around, nudging them and bowing down for play.

From somewhere behind them there was a chuff of another wolf and Lambert was off like a shot, tearing through the house even as Vesemir called after him to not break anything.

“Children. I don’t know how many hundred years old and they’re still children.”

In the garden, Geralt looked far too smug, two large paws pinning Jaskier down by the chest. Drool dripped from his mouth as his tongue lolled in happy pants.

“Geralt, stop being a brat!” At Vesemir’s words all drooling stopped and Jaskier wiped his face in white fur.

It only increased the crew’ curiosity about the relationship between everyone. This curiosity was their downfall, despite the clear instructions and rules, they just had to take a peek into the forbidden rooms. They agreed to do it on the last night, when everyone was asleep. As silently as possible, they approached the first door that Jaskier tended to disappear through each night. It was unlocked and they door swung open on silent hinges. Inside was a rather plain bedroom, most of the space was taken up by a gigantic bed. On it, Geralt and Jaskier were entwined, Geralt’s nose buried in Jaskier’s hair. It was sweet until they realised that it was a bare hip that was visible and all answers about that particular relationship were answered.

Interestingly, there were two doors along the wall, both open. One was obviously a bathroom but the other seemed to open into another bedroom. Any further investigation was cut short by a low, menacing growl from behind them.

If the play fighting between Geralt and Lambert had been scary, it was nothing compared to facing down an unknown wolf in the dark. Eyes almost glowing, teeth gleaming in the low light, Eskel stepped closer, head lowered in a snarl. It made the differences between play and real fighting abundantly clear and the crew were thoroughly terrified. It didn’t help that as soon as Eskel’s growls got louder, Lambert was tearing through the door from the connecting bedroom, hackles raised and stalking closer from the other side.

A light came on and Jaskier blinked, sitting up in bed. Geralt didn’t need to change into his wolf form to look intimidating, even naked.

“What’s going on?”

“Caught some idiots sneaking in on you while you were asleep,” Eskel’s voice was low, a growl still evident and betraying his fury. “Want me to see them out?”

That sounded more like a threat than anything else. Tiredly, Jaskier rubbed his eyes. “I think they can find their own ways back to their beds. You come to bed too, look, Lambert’s already settling down for the night.”

A quick glance revealed that Lambert was indeed fussing with the blankets. As a human. Scowling, Eskel stepped around the crew, gave them one last glare before shutting the door in their face. There was the sound of the bed creaking a little as another body joined the pile and the crew looked at each other. Just when they thought they had the mystery of the dynamics cracked, it got more complicated.

[shitty-marvel-fan732]

Is That...?

Title: Is That...?

Pairing: Loki x Avenger!Reader

Requested?: Yes! @wolfiegal98​ I hope you like it love!

Word Count: 6,200 ish

Warnings: Cursing, fighting, mentions of past death

Summary: Loosely follows the plot of Thor Ragnarok. What will happen when the reader finds out that Loki has actually been alive for the past 4 years? Angst and Fluff.

Author's Note: I sincerely hope this makes sense 😂 I picture the reader to be a mutant in this, capable of controlling the air, water, and fire around her, but it's not really explained well because this was already like 6k. P.s., its not my GIF!

“Stephen?” you called curiously, not moving to get up in the slightest. In all honesty, it baffled you that after almost a year of studying under him that you still had nearly no ability to navigate the Sanctum, but it felt like there was little you could do to change that. As much as you enjoyed spending time with the good Doctor, you absolutely loathed trying to find anything in this maze of a building -- you'd figured out pretty quickly that it was much easier to simply yell for him rather than attempt to find anything yourself. 

“In the front.”

You yelped as the disembodied head of your mentor popped momentarily through one of his glowy, orange portals before disappearing again. 

Forget trying to find your way around this place, you’d never get used to that. 

Rolling your eyes, a wave of your hand produced a gust of wind that weightlessly lifted you from your seat and carried you to the front. 

"You know you don't have to scare the shit out of me every time I--"

Your complaint died in your throat before you managed to finish your thought. The wind that’d been carrying you died down immediately and your feet landed on the floor with a light thump. 

Standing near Stephen was a certain blond-haired Asgardian. He was holding an umbrella, and wearing what you could only imagine was an outfit meant to help him blend in with human beings -- as if that were possible. You blinked, brain taking only a split-second to process the sight in front of you before your face cracked into a huge smile. 

"Thor!" you greeted happily before launching yourself into the god's already open arms. Thor chuckled amusedly as he embraced you tightly. 

"Hello to you as well Lady Y/N," he grinned, flashing his thousand-watt smile down towards you. You grinned as you pulled yourself out of his arms, feeling thoroughly surprised and delighted. 

"Where have you been? It's been, what like 2 years?" you questioned breathlessly as you punched him squarely on the arm in playful irritation. He only grinned wider, body not moving an inch as you hit him. 

“Eh you know, here and there,” he shrugged. “Saved a couple of planets from destruction, things like that.”

“Still modest as ever I see,” you giggled. 

“Yes, and I see you’ve been working on things since I've left,” Thor complimented. “Your control is quite impressive.”

“That’s not all I can do either,” you teased smugly. Thor chuckled amicably, one brow raised in interest. It was true, working closely with Stephen for the past year had not only massively helped you learn how to use your powers, but had led you to actually discovering some you’d never known you had. 

"Anyways. Thor is here to locate his father," Stephen interjected. "I was just about to send him on his way."

Your brows immediately dipped into a frown, eyes raking over the men in hopes that their faces would yield some sort of explanation. Though Strange's face remained impassive, Thor's expression at once became more solemn. 

"Odin's here? Like on Earth?" you questioned curiously. Thor merely nodded, eyes casting downwards as if to purposely avoid your gaze. As your mind ran wild with the new information, you internally wondered what the Asgardian king could possibly be doing on Earth. Moreover, you didn't understand why his presence would cause Thor to require Stephen's help. Eyebrow raised in suspicion, you crossed your arms and urged the men with a silent look to explain further. 

"Yes, in a place called Norway apparently. It's kind of a long story," Thor drawled. "One with many more questions than answers I'm afraid. I should probably be going to fetch him now."

Stephan nodded waving his arms nonchalantly and opening a portal, but you remained still, wondering what it was that they both knew that you were missing. 

"And I suppose I'll be needing my brother back," he finished, looking towards Stephen expectantly. 

"Your what now?" you choked. 

"Oh yeah, right," Stephen hummed.

He waved his hands above his head and another portal opened. You heard screaming coming from above, and not a second later a man fell straight out onto the Sanctum's floor with an echoing thud. Your jaw dropped.

It couldn't be. 

"I have been falling for thirty minutes!" the man roared from the ground, fists clenched and posture rigid.  

If you weren't so thoroughly consumed by your complete confusion and the small, futile feelings of hope growing within your chest, you might've laughed at the familiar voice's indignant cry.

"Is that…" you managed to ask weakly, your body completely frozen as your brain worked in overdrive trying to make sense of what you were seeing. The man stood slowly to his feet as you vaguely heard Thor and Stephen talking next to you. It felt like all the breath in your body had been stolen from you, unable to believe the sight before you. 

It was him. 

Loki, the god of mischief, stood just a few feet from you, huffing and dusting himself off. 

Loki who'd been dead for the better part of 4 years. 

Loki. 

"I-- he -- but he's -- what," you spluttered helplessly. Loki's eyes flashed to your face as you spoke. A look of utter shock filtered through his blue-green irises as he caught sight of your frozen form, and his pale face rapidly lost what little color it'd had to begin with. You whimpered pathetically. It felt like your brain might actually be imploding from its inability to process what was happening right now. "You--"

"Darling," Loki breathed, raising his hands in front of him in surrender. You gaped, mouth hanging wide open. 

"Uhm yes, quick update Loki is alive," Thor announced with a quick clap of his hands. "And while I'm sure the two of you have much to discuss we really need to be--" 

"You-- asshole."

"Y/N--"

"You absolute FUCKING ASSHOLE," you screeched, body suddenly erupting into a kind of fury the likes of which you'd never experienced. "YOU LET EVERYONE -- LET ME -- THINK THAT YOU WERE DEAD FOR FOUR FUCKING YEARS, AND YOU HAVE THE AUDACITY TO SHOW UP HERE NOW?"

You could feel your powers surging to the surface, the unbridled rage practically begging to be set free as you crossed the large gap between your bodies in mere seconds. Too livid to even let your natural instincts take over, you simply begin pounding your fists against every available inch of the now-cowering god's body. 

"What in FUCKS name are you even doing here, you lying, evil piece of SHIT?" your fists pounded relentlessly against Loki, primal screams of pure anger ripping from your throat as you did. Eventually, you felt your body being pulled away, a giant pair of hands gripping your waist tightly. 

"Alright now, that's probably enough," Thor's booming chuckle broke through the rhythmic, deafening pounding of your racing heartbeat in your ears. He caged your body against his with seemingly very little effort, expression wholly amused at your reaction. 

You thrashed wildly against his hold, rage still searing through your every pore like a wave of molten hot lava. Your irses began to turn red and your fingertips sparked with little bursts of flame. Falling still for only a moment, your hands darted out, grasping one of Thor’s forearms tightly as your palms glowed with a brilliant, vibrant blue. Thor growled in pain as your heated skin gripped his flesh, arms instantly releasing you as he cradled his burnt limb gingerly. 

"Since when can you do that?" Thor demanded, looking very much like he was in shock. 

Smiling smugly, your hands became engulfed in flames and you turned your attention back to Loki. 

"Told you I'd learned some new tricks," you growled before lunging towards Loki. You only made it a half a step before an invisible force held you in place. 

“How many times do I have to tell you Y/N, no fire in the Sanctum!” Stephen scolded sternly before a flick of his hand sent you, Thor, and Loki straight through the portal. 

You landed with a soft thump and found yourself rolling across grass, any sight of the Sanctum completely gone. Groaning a little at the pain in your side from the way you'd fallen, your eyes roamed over the field with confusion. 

“You can come back when you’re done with your little tantrum,” Strange’s voice echoed in your head from afar. You huffed in disbelief as your surroundings became clear. 

He’d sent you to fucking Norway. 

“Y/N,” Loki called quietly. 

Residual anger bubbled up in your chest once more at the sound of his voice. You turned to find him standing a few yards away, hands raised in surrender once more and handsome features cautiously scanning your face. 

“I must explai--,”

“Loki.” Thor cut his brother off sharply, staring towards the cliff. Loki’s eyes travelled to meet his brother’s gaze, breath catching in his throat once he noted Odin’s seated form on a large rock near the coastline. Thor began to walk purposefully over to his father, but Loki's attention turned back to you. You huffed loudly as you stared furiously into his pleading eyes, your body not moving an inch. After a few moments of intense eye contact you cocked your head towards Odin, indicating that he should proceed. Loki nodded tensely in thanks before striding off to where his father and brother sat. 

Letting out a massive sigh, you ran your fingers through your hair once you were left standing alone. A tiny flash of guilt started to fill your tummy as you watched the men murmur amongst themselves. Deciding it was probably best to give them a little privacy, you turned away, awkwardly fiddling with the rings on your fingers as you waited for them to finish speaking. 

Your mind felt like it was practically buzzing with thoughts as you tried to process everything that'd just happened. Thor's abrupt reappearance, the fact that your mentor had basically banished you to Norway, the nagging question of why Odin was even on this planet, and of course there was the small detail of Loki being back from the dead. 

Again. 

Though you probably should've been trying to figure out what kind of otherworldly threat could've brought the Asgardian king down from his golden palace, you found the majority of your thoughts turning to his adoptive son. 

Along with Thor, you'd been tasked with escorting Loki back to Asgard after the battle of New York to ensure his unhindered return. Finding yourself wholly fascinated by the entirely new and exciting planet, you'd stayed for much longer than anyone thought you would. You were so interested, in fact, that you ended up staying on Asgard for almost a year. The team back in Stark Tower thought you were crazy for staying as long as you did. 

If they only knew how you'd been occupying your time in Asgard. They'd probably would've had you committed. 

You wound up spending large portions of your time with a certain prisoner -- a fact that you hid from everyone for a long time. At first it was simply to ensure that it was indeed still Loki within his cell and not another illusion, but over time it evolved into something else entirely. Something more. 

He started to help you learn about your powers, even showing you that you could do more than just manipulate the air. Together you explored your control over fire and water in small doses, and in turn, you became someone he could talk to -- to pass the time with. The more you learned about Asgardian culture the more time you spent down with Loki, talking about anything and everything you could think of. It wasn’t long before you found yourself harboring a secret crush on the exiled prince, slowly but surely learning to trust him and him you. You were never truly sure if he felt the same -- true he referred to you as his "darling" or "pet" more than your own name, but you could never be sure he wasn't tricking you. As time passed you fell more deeply in love with the god, and you questioned his affections less and less. The two of you never discussed your relationship aloud, but something deep in his eyes told you he just might return your feelings.

You stayed in Asgard so long that you were still around when Jane became possessed by the Aether. You and Thor worked together to free Loki from his cell, and later you wound up on Svartalfheim in an attempt to save Jane’s life. 

You’d fought alongside them, and watched helplessly as Loki died right before your eyes. For all he taught you in the past months, your skills were just too weak still to stop the chaos that was raging around you.

 You weren’t strong enough to keep him safe. 

You’d clutched his hand as he groaned in pain, the cascade of tears falling from your eyes blurring the horrific sight. Even so, the image of his motionless, frail body lying on the ground had been burned into your memory ever since. 

You returned back to Earth immediately after that, all interest in Asgard gone. You’d spent the last few years trying futilely to distract yourself by working with the Avengers, which eventually led to you studying under Dr. Strange. You trained everyday, fighting to gain some semblance of control over your abilities and determined to never let anything like what happened in Svartalfheim happen again.

Your head began to ache from the seemingly constant torrent of questions flowing through your brain. How had he survived? Why had he tricked everyone into thinking he was dead? Where had he been all this time? And most importantly, why hadn’t he come to see you? 

A pang of rejection ripped through your chest as your brain fought to reconcile Loki’s actions with the sweet, caring man you came to know on Asgard. Surely you must have been mistaken-- a silly girl falling for the handsome god's tricks like a fool. No one who cared for you would leave you like that. 

The low, rumbling sounds of thunder booming overhead brought you out of your thoughts. You were on your feet in an instant, body tensing and eyes flashing over to the brothers. A fleeting rush of confusion washed over you as you noted Odin’s absence, but you weren't given much time to think about it. 

Thor and Loki stomped towards you with their gazes trained on something behind you. A bolt of lightning and a flash of green enveloping them respectively, the two of them simultaneously donned their battle gear. You rolled your eyes. 

"So dramatic," you mumbled to yourself as you turned to face whatever it was they were heading towards. 

-----------------------------------

"YOU TINY AVENGER!"

Your head snapped up instantly, body tensing as you were abruptly ripped out of your sleep by Hulk's roar. You groaned, rolling to your side and thrusting your sweaty face deeper into your pillow. Sleep had never come easy to you, and even though your dreams for the past 2 weeks had all been the same gut-wrenching memory, that didn't make your abrupt wake up call any more welcome. 

You'd found Bru-Hulk almost immediately after arriving on Sakaar, seeing as the bifrost had spit you out straight into the colosseum in the middle of one of his death matches. You, having very little knowledge of how the bifrost mechanics worked, had absolutely no clue where you were. 

To say you'd been confused was the understatement of the millennium. 

Disoriented and probably concussed from your not-so-graceful entrance, you weren't left with much time to acclimate yourself from your surroundings before two guards had tackled you to the ground and stuck some kind of taser in your neck. Terrified, you'd tried to fight back, but you were too weak; one press of button later and you were incapacitated in an instant.The pain that seared through you from that wretched torture machine left you unable to do anything other than writhe helplessly in the dirt. Your screams of utter agony were enough to finally pull Hulk's attention away from his fight. He'd gone into a rage as soon as he realized it was you, turning on the guards instantly. 

It'd been 2 weeks since then, and with no signs of either Thor or Loki you'd essentially turned into the Hulk's personal babysitter. Apparently he was too big to be fit with one of those taser-disc things and his tantrum didn't end after he'd dismembered those guards. Evidently Hulk had thrown a fit -- in the way only he really could-- and wouldn't stop until some man called the 'Grandmaster' allowed you to stay with him. In exchange for your new home, you'd been tasked with calming him down whenever necessary.

Which, you'd quickly learned, was pretty much a 24/7 job.

Grumbling and cursing under your breath, you flung your legs out of bed and stomped into the next room in a huff. You were fully prepared to give Hulk a piece of your mind, but the sight of another person in his massive room was enough to stop you dead in your tracks. Sitting next to Hulk on the steps that led up to his massive bed was a figure that made your stomach flutter with hope. Unsure and not trusting your eyes, you spoke up as you cautiously approached the pair. 

“Thor?”

He turned his head at your call, a look of utter shock taking over his features as he recognized you. 

"Y/N!"

He jumped to his feet, making quick work of the small space that separated the two of you and immediately pulling you into a bone-crushing hug. 

"I can't believe you're here, I was so worried when I saw that she-beast knock you out of the bifrost, you have no idea," he breathed, face buried deep into your neck. You could only squeak in reply. His arms were wrapped so tightly around you that speaking wasn't exactly possible.

"Thor," you wheezed. "Can't...breathe."

Thor let you go instantly, sending you a sheepish expression as you coughed and tried to catch your breath. You doubled over and put your hands on your knees as you fought to regulate your breathing. Thor apologized, clapping a hand on your back in an awkward attempt at comfort. After a moment or two you straightened up a little bit and opened your mouth to dismiss his apologies, but Hulk beat you to the punch. 

Literally. 

A single swing from him was all it took to send Thor careening into the far wall. He crashed into the structure so hard that you felt the floor rattle beneath you, before falling into a heap surrounded by chunks of the crumbling plaster. Your jaw dropped. 

"THOR NO HURT FRIEND," Hulk roared, stepping in front of you protectively. You quickly sidestepped his giant frame and ran to Thor before crouching down. 

"Hulk no," you scolded. "He wasn't hurting me on purpose, he was just surprised! Are you okay Thor?"

"Perfectly fine," he groaned, standing quickly while swiping some of the remaining wall debris from his shoulders and stretching out his neck. "Unfortunately that's not the first time he's done that today."

"Hrrmph," Hulk pouted, stomping his foot. "Thor no hurt friend."

"It's okay buddy, I'm okay," you soothed, hand rubbing small circles on one of his massive arms. 

"Yes, well," Thor grumbled, clearly miffed that your attention and sympathy had been stolen from him so quickly. "Regardless, Y/N we have to get back to Asgard as soon as possible. Hela will destroy everything if we don't stop her."

You nodded tensely. A shiver ran its course down the entire length of your spine at the mention of his demonic sister. 

"Obviously, but I have absolutely no idea how we're gonna do that," you replied solemnly, crossing your arms. "My knowledge of inter-world travel begins and ends with the bifrost, and since I'm assuming that's out I have absolutely no suggestions."

Thor grinned. 

-----------------------------------

“This is the stupidest thing I’ve ever been a part of,” you mumbled to yourself as you fiddled around with the controls of the ship that Valkyrie told you to get. You'd been sitting in the cockpit for an insane amount of time waiting for Thor. You'd gotten separated from him and Bruce in the massive parade after the whole Quinjet fiasco, but thankfully Valkyrie had found you later and given you the rundown of their plan. 

A plan which seemed questionable at best, seeing as you'd been waiting for the past hour for a certain blond-haired god to show up. 

Huffing in irritation, you poised your fingers above the controls and started the massive engines. You were about to fly off in search of your moron friends when you heard a commotion down below. 

"Get help please!" 

Your brows furrowed in confusion at the sound of the familiar voice’s cry. 

"Thor?" you questioned to yourself quietly, heart rate picking up speed as you anxiously darted off the ship. "Thor? Is that you, what's happening?"

"Ahhh Y/N!" he grinned widely as you approached. "Perfect timing, I see Valkyrie has given us the same task."

You rolled your eyes.

"Actually I've been here a while now, what took you so lo--," you cut yourself off as you noticed Loki sprawled out on the ground behind Thor, paralyzed as one of the obedience disks tased him constantly. "Oh you've got to be fucking kidding me."

Thor followed your gaze to his brother curiously, as if he'd forgotten he was even there. 

"Ah, yes. I found out Loki is also here. Surprise?" he ventured chuckling. "However since he seems to only wish to do us harm, I've elected to leave him here." 

You glanced down, a pang of guilt striking you deep in your stomach at the look of pure agony etched across Loki's handsome features. You'd be lying if you didn't also feel a little bit smug at his evident discomfort, but even with all the pain he'd put you through you couldn't help but feel a tiny twinge of sympathy. His eyes locked onto your face, the blue-green orbs teaming with shock and a glimmer of an emotion you couldn’t quite place. He rolled his head desperately towards your frozen body as a wave of deja vu overcame your already overloaded mind. You stared deeply into his pain-ravaged expression, a single thought piercing through your chest as you studied his eyes. 

He hadn't known you were here. 

"At any rate, I imagine now would be as good a time as any to take our leave," Thor interrupted your mental musings. "Which was the ship she told us to get?"

You numbly pointed to the ship behind you, unable to tear your eyes away from the face of the man you'd thought dead for the second time in less than a month. Thor looked between you and his adoptive brother thoughtfully for a beat before comfortingly clapping a massive hand on your shoulder. The kind gesture was enough to snap you out of the daze you'd been in, and you shook your head to try and clear the tyranny of thoughts rumbling around in your brain. 

You began walking robotically towards the ship, but Thor's hand gripped your shoulder harder, forcing you to stop. You looked up at him with a questioning glance, confused. 

"I know we aren't exactly the closest of friends," he started, awkwardly clearing his throat. "But, as someone who's a bit too familiar with loss, I think some closure is in order here, hmm?"

You opened your mouth, eager to refute the insinuation, but Thor raised his hand to stop you before the words could come out. 

“I’ve seen the way you two look at one another. Please, for your sake, say your piece now because it's the last chance you may ever get.”

Your mouth clamped shut. Swallowing thickly, your eyes darted from Thor's stern yet compassionate face to Loki's paralyzed form and back. You nodded once. 

Thor smiled softly at the two of you, rubbing a small circle against your shoulder with his hand before jogging away. You took a deep breath and crouched down beside Loki's still twitching body. 

"There's so much to say," you started, looking off into the distance. You knew the moment you looked at him that it’d all be over, and so you stubbornly turned your face away from him and fixed your gaze on the far wall. "I honestly don't even know where to begin. Mostly I have a lot of questions. How could you forget me so easily? Why would you just let me think that you were dead? D-did you ever care about me?"

Though his body was still completely immobilized, Loki's eyes were locked onto your face with rapt attention as you spoke. With each pained word and crack in your voice a sharp pain like a knife stabbed through his heart and drove itself deeper and deeper. 

"Even if you could answer I doubt it'd mean anything," you continued, swiping a lone tear from your cheek. "I spent 4 years thinking you were gone. 4 years of grief and misery that I thought would be the worst pain I'd ever feel. But I was wrong -- knowing now that you were out there all that time, and that you didn't care enough about me to stick around? That's the worst kind of pain. The gnawing, hollowing ache of knowing that you love someone who's never going to love you back."

His eyes had never been wider as you paused briefly and let out a sob. Tears slipped down his cheeks in a mirror image of yours, and his body began twisting, desperately trying to get closer to you. You couldn’t see, but his fingers were twitching and clawing at the ground in a futile effort to connect his skin to yours. You sniffled and wiped your nose as you shakily stood to your feet, completely oblivious to his desperation. You started to walk back to the ship, pausing only for a moment to turn and make one last statement. 

"I'm not going to wait, and I'm not going to wonder why anymore. Because the truth of it is, I'm just a stupid girl who fell in love with a liar. And I know I’m always going to love you, but I refuse to let you define me any longer." 

-----------------------------------

You grunted in pain as the sword of one of the many undead Asgardian warriors sliced through your arm. Scoffing, you thrust your flaming fist straight into its stupid, skeletal face and sent it flying off of the bridge. Gently touching your fingertips to your bicep and grimacing when you pulled them back bloody, you turned to face Heimdal. 

“There’s too many of them,” you cried, conjuring a gust of wind that knocked a group of the soldiers flying into the water below. Heimdal didn’t answer, too busy fighting to keep some distance between the Asgardian crowd and the army. Wiping a bloody hand across your forehead, you noticed the soldiers that you’d knocked into the water starting to claw their way back up into the fray. Groaning, you closed your eyes and concentrated until the water below became wild. The waves began thrashing around furiously, the tallest one knocking the skeletal bodies back down into the storm below. 

Exhausted, you fell to your knees. You weren’t used to using your powers on this kind of scale, and you hardly ever exercised your control over water. Much preferring to use fire or wind, you'd never tried to manipulate an amount of water so large before. Stars danced in front of your eyes and you felt weaker than you had in years. The thudding vibrations of running boots and the clanging of swords filled your ears as you panted, and for a moment you lost all hope.

Until a firm, yet gentle hand placed itself under your chin, forcing you to look up. 

"Now, now sweetling," a low voice practically purred in your ear, and you felt yourself being lifted up from the ground. "This is no place to rest." 

You looked up to find the blueish-greenish eyes that'd haunted your dreams for the past 5 years staring down at you. 

Loki. 

Your breath hitched in your throat at the sight, a shiver running through your entire body at the sensation of being in his arms. The way his eyes bored into yours, it felt like you couldn't move, couldn't even breathe. You were locked into place, utterly mesmerized by the intensity of his gaze. He raised a hand, fingers hesitating for only a split second before they nimbly swept a piece of your hair off of your face. You couldn't help but lean your face into his palm that rested on your cheek, allowing yourself to forget everything else that wasn't the feel of his skin on yours for just a moment. 

But only for a moment. 

You were abruptly brought back down to earth-- or rather Asgard you supposed-- with a sensation like an earthquake vibrating upwards from your boots and the low-rumbling sound of thunder filling your ears. You straightened up in just enough time to see Thor launch himself into the fray, massive surges of lightning engulfing him. You grinned, the sight of your blonde friend looking more god-like than he had in weeks caused a surge of energy to roll through your body like one of his bolts of electricity. Suddenly re-energized and ready to fight alongside your blonde companion, you hopped to your feet. Sending Loki one last determined look, you ran head first into the battle, fists ablaze. 

Savagely ripping through soldier after soldier, your red eyes were focused completely on the fight all around you. You almost didn't hear Loki as he yelled over the din of the battle.  

"I did it for you, you know," he grunted as he too slashed through the seemingly never-ending torrent of Hela's army. "Staying away. It was what I thought was best."

"Seriously? We're going to do this now?" came your incredulous reply, reducing two of the soldiers into balls of flame before gaping at Loki. He kicked another off of the bridge before shrugging. 

"The last two times haven't exactly been ideal either."

Humming angrily, you turned away from him and continued your attack, intent on blocking him out. Loki clearly had other plans, inching his way forward until the two of you were practically back to back as you fought. 

"I was a war criminal, a prisoner and helping that mortal wasn't going to change anything. What sort of life was I to offer you had I stayed?" he reasoned before turning you forcibly around to face him. 

Despite the fight still raging all around you, you paused and looked at the god in front of you. You were staring each other down, your glare meeting his distressed and pleading gaze as if the two of you were the only ones in the world. 

"You expect me to believe that? That you lied to me, that you left me because you cared?" you spit out, hot tears spilling from your eyes as you spoke. Expression crumbling, Loki reached out and tried to connect your hands, but you jerked yours away before he could, your palm instantly erupting into flames. 

"You deserved better than that, better than me. You still do," he murmured. "I destroy everything, everyone around me. I couldn't bear the thought of bringing another person I care for so dearly down with me." 

You tried with every fiber of your being not to let him get to you. You reminded yourself of all the pain and misery he'd caused you -- futilely dredging up memories of all the nights you'd spent crying yourself to sleep. You squeezed your eyes shut as if not seeing his face would make it easier to resist. Your hands slowly started to extinguish as they shook, your anger fading to sadness that rolled into a tight ball in your chest that felt like it was going to suffocate you. 

"I ca-can't...you--," you blubbered incoherently. "I can't do this now." 

You turned away once more, but this time Loki stopped you by grabbing your hand desperately. The icy temperature of his skin caused what little flame was left behind to fizzle out with a small cloud of smoke. You gasped at the feeling, but didn't make any moves to remove your hand from his. 

"You asked how I could forget about you so easily, and the answer is really quite simple: I didn't," he continued breathlessly. "I couldn't. You filled my mind each and every day that we were apart, and it was only the thought of you that made the days bearable. I checked on you, often. I needed to know that you were doing alright, needed to prove myself right-- that you were, and will always be, better off without me. I know I’ve given you absolutely no reason to believe me, but if you come away from this embarrassingly honest conversation knowing only one thing, I need it to be this: I do love you, my dearest Y/N. I love you more than I can rightly express aloud, and I’ll spend the rest of my miserable existance ensuring that you never question that again if you’ll allow me. ” 

You couldn’t help the gasp that escaped you at his admission, and the hand that wasn’t currently entwined firmly within his flew to cover your mouth. As soon as the words left his lips you felt all of your anger, all your stubborn resolve vanish from your chest in an instant, the feelings quickly replaced by a wave of love the likes of which you’d never felt before. A choked sob left you as you searched his face frantically, looking for any twinkle of mischief or the slightest indication that he could be lying. 

His expression was firm, mouth drawn in a sort of dazed smile as he gazed down at you, lovingly. Brows raised and forehead adorably wrinkled with anxiety, he waited patiently for you to respond. You searched his eyes with your own, almost getting lost in the sea of emotion that ran through them and idly wondered if yours looked the same. He looked so hopeful, so sincere, and you felt the warm feelings of your chest expand and grow at an incredible rate. 

“Y-you...you love me?” you managed to murmur, gaze still locked firmly on his face as you worked intently to memorize his features. His lips quirked into what was quite possibly the most beautiful and honest smile you’d ever seen, and his hand gently lifted to your face. Rubbing soft circles into your cheek with the pad of his thumb, he answered so quietly you almost missed it. 

“More than I ever thought possible.”

Unable to physically stand the distance between you for another second, you carelessly crashed your body into his. Arms winding their way around his shoulders to anchor themselves, you connected your mouth to his, desperate to feel his skin against yours. He responded just as quickly, both hands now cupping your face as his smooth lips worked fervently over yours. The two of you were pressed together so tightly it was almost painful, but you couldn’t bring yourself to focus on anything outside of the feeling of his kiss. After wondering for so long, the feeling of his skin on yours was indescribable. Your fingers threaded through his dark, curly locks as you struggled to pull him impossibly closer to you, and you shivered in pleasure at the low growl your actions seemed to pull from his throat. 

After an indefinite, but altogether too brief length of time, you were forced to pull away from him -- panting and working intently to catch your breath, you settled for leaning your forehead against his as he did the same. For all the time you’d spent manipulating the wind to carry you around, you swore you’d never felt more weightless than you did in this moment. You couldn’t erase the dopey smile that you were sure was stretched across your face right now, but you didn’t care. Especially once you opened your eyes to find the same, love-struck grin plastered across Loki’s handsome features. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve waited to do that,” he chuckled breathlessly. His voice was lower than you’d ever heard, and he sounded so uncharacteristically shy that you couldn’t help but lift yourself on your tiptoes to press a chaste kiss to his cheek. 

“Not sure if it really needs saying at this point, but I love y--,” 

“Oi, lovebirds!,” Valkyrie interrupted, shouting from across the bridge. “If it pleases the two of you, perhaps you could come help now?”

Loki cleared his throat, a pink tinge dusting across his cheeks as he noticed his brother and Valkyrie looking at the pair of you with teasing expressions. You couldn’t help but giggle at his evident embarrassment, gazing adoringly at his reddened-features for a split second. Threading your fingers through his confidently, you tugged him along and the two of you left to join your group for what you hoped would be the final battle. 

[fijiangecko]

Maintaining a New Life

Chapter 4 - Blast from the Past

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Read it on AO3 here

A/N: A little late again. I’ll be better <3

~~~~~~

Laughter echoes across the metallic surfaces of the facility, almost as if Tendou was laughing at you from all angles. Impossibly so, your knuckles clench harder on Kuroo’s shirt and your forehead burns into the skin on his chest. His hands place themselves on your arms, unsure of what to do in this situation.

“No need to hide! We just wanna talk!” Iwaizumi’s jaw flexes when Tendou speaks, safely clicking off on the pistol in hand. Your mind races a thousand thoughts a second as you try and formulate a plan to get everyone out. Oikawa glances over his shoulder for a brief second and sees your position in Kuroo’s arms. He lets a hand release from his own gun and swats your side. The movement causes you to startle, but both Tooru and Kuroo keep you as silent as possible when you shift out of Kuroo’s arms. The former questions you with his eyes, which are now laced with concern as he hasn’t ever really seen you like this before.

Footsteps inch closer and closer, everyone’s heart pounding together to create a cacophony of drums. Oikawa continues to stare into your eyes, practically pleading you to do something as he readjusts his position to hold the gun with both hands once more. Iwaizumi takes a step back and squishes everyone closer together against the cold concrete walls.

You bite your lip to the point where you can taste iron. Releasing Kuroo’s shirt, you fully press yourself against the wall. The two with eyes on you furrow their brows in confusion until they see the faintest blue light build around your form. In a matter of seconds it snaps and splinters off of your figure and the wall is replaced with the parking lot. In the distance, the moonlight shines off of the glossy paint on your car.

“We’re gonna find you one way or another!” The voice sounds much to close and you step out into the parking lot and pull the boys with you, each falling on their asses when you quickly shut the portal and let out a breath you hadn’t realised you were holding. Your hands place themselves on top of your knees, heaving over and taking deep breaths to soothe yourself as each of the guys stand up. Once the beating of your heart slows to a reasonable pace, you turn on your heel and head to the car. Iwaizumi and Oikawa are right on your tail and hop in without question.

Kuroo lags behind the group, confused on the quick turn of events. He has never known you to back out of something so quickly, and he most definitely has never seen that look on your face - a look of concern. It irks him that all of the sudden, right when you all get a lead, or potentially have the killers right in front of you, you turn and run. His legs carry him behind your figure, but his fists clench when you quickly turn the keys in the door and hop in without a second thought.

He stands outside of the car and stares at his reflection through the glass. You turn the ignition and press on the brake, bracing yourself to make a quick getaway, but as you turn to check your surroundings you see Kuroo.

“Kuroo.” Whatever train of thought he was on was derailed. “Get in the car.” Your tone is both harsh but caring as you try and convey the urgency of the situation.

“Why?” He continues to look at himself, but acknowledges your own look of confusion in his peripheral.

“What do you mean ‘why’? We need to get out of here-”

“Why aren’t we stopping them?” His golden irises hold your own in an intensive stare, a competition of wills. The rhythmic drumming of your heart skips a beat at his conviction, but you know better than to force him into this world.

"We can't." Short and simple, you still don't want to lie to him.

The engine fills the silence as it whirs and grumbles under the cool night air. A soft breeze dances through Kuroo’s hair as he continues to hold his gaze against yours. Both of you are set in your choices, stubborn and defiant against the other.

“Kuroo.” Iwaizumi stands next to the passenger door. “Please. Just get in the car and we can explain later.”

“No.” His eyes flicker between yourself and Iwa, but he sheds his jacket and throws it into the car, pulling out the handgun that was tucked into the waist of his pants and turns to face the building. “These guys could be our killers, and they might be planning to kill tonight. If someone dies, then that’s on us.” With one final glance, he turns his head towards you. Your muscles are all tense, knuckles white from clenching the steering wheel so hard and he can see that you're grinding your teeth - a bad habit that he thought you had gotten rid of a while ago. “I can’t- won’t be responsible for someone’s death.”

With that, he heads into the dark night, his silhouette only visible from the dim street lights as he moves swiftly towards the building. Each step he takes causes your body to panic further. He could die. Tendou will take him and torture him for information. 

These thoughts race at a thousand miles per second in your head, all the while Oikawa and Iwaizumi see that you’re starting to lose it. They remember when you would get like this, but neither of them were well equipped to help you out of these situations. Oikawa, from the back seat, ever so gently places a hand on your shoulder when he sees that you’ve been blinking your eyes rapidly for a few seconds. You don’t register the feeling, and continue to think about every outcome in which you lose Kuroo. In most cases, it’s for good.

Tooru looks at Hajime, who is still outside of the vehicle, as he chews the inside of his cheek and gives you a squeeze on the shoulder. Hajime pops his knuckles and takes a deep breath. This isn’t just bad in regards to Kuroo going rogue, but the fact that all three of you could get found out. To him, that just means more hiding and relocating or facing the music.

“Y/N.” His voice erupts over the beating in your eardrums, and reflexively you look to Hajime. His eyes try and say what he doesn’t wish to, but he grabs his gun once more through the window of the car and purses his lips.

You’ve worked with these two for so long, that it’s not a challenge to understand what he’s saying. With shaky hands, you turn the keys out of the ignition and scratch at your forehead. Tooru is already out of the car when you shove open the door and stand up. Just as Kuroo had done a few moments prior, you shed your jacket and pull out a similar handgun to what everyone else is sporting.

“So are we going to…?” The taller of the three speaks, his chocolate hair brushing his face in the silent wind.

He’s referring to Tendou and whoever the colleague is, but your priorities lie elsewhere. “No. Main goal is to get Kuroo and get the fuck out. It would be best if they don’t see us at all.” The two nod and cock their guns. You take one last deep breath and start the pursuit.

The three of you jog to the entrance, the door open and footsteps still echoing across the various pieces of metal. You turn to Oikawa as you place your back on the wall, waiting for confirmation that it’s safe enough to go in. He stands next to you with Iwa behind him and takes a second to listen, already having put his gift in use. Nodding once, you quickly head in and look for the nearest spot of cover.

The boys follow behind and place themselves on either side of you, waiting for the next move. This is how it's always been, with you taking the lead and them just knowing how and when to move around you. They’ve spent years learning your tactics and body language in order to work in such a smooth fashion was intense, but pays off in moments like these.

With all of your backs against the cold concrete walls, you whisper to Oikawa. “Can you hear Kuroo?”

He nods and points further into the room, also giving a hand signal that the coast is clear just up ahead. Iwaizumi takes the lead this time, making sure that the bright aqua flash is quick to snap around his form before he takes off. He remains light on his feet as he moves, but consciously makes an effort to shield both of you from any possible dangers.

As the three of you run to the next covered area, you spot a tuft of black hair behind a large machine towards the end of the room. You know that the others saw the same thing. You proceed as before, with Oikawa giving signals and Iwaizumi leading as you try your best to remain calm and focus on the task at hand.

The only thing that distracts you is the vibrant red hair peering over some pipes on the opposite end of the room. Your legs stutter in their movements, and cause Tooru to slam into you. The grunt that escapes both of your lips is booming over what was previously silent, and your reflexes tell you to scatter before Tendou can locate you.

Hajime roughly pulls Oikawa along with him as they head back towards the door, but you scurry off closer to Kuroo and find a small compartment to lodge yourself in. 

“Little detectives!” With a lilt in his voice, Tendou sprints over to the previous point of contact and scans the area with keen eyes. Based on the sound, you guess that his partner did not follow him and is still checking the rest of the rooms out. “There’s only so many places you can hide!”

You hold your breath, knowing that you’re much closer to him than the boys. If he finds me, it’s game over. A hand makes its way over your mouth as you try to regulate your frantic heart, as it wants to leap out of your chest and run away.

Only a little ways down from you, Kuroo had heard the grunts but had recognized them as your own. A sigh of relief leaves his lips, thankful that you decided to come help him. The relief lasts only for a moment before the perp runs over to your potential location and starts taunting you all. Strategically, Kuroo starts to think of where everyone could be located. His one goal at this moment is to pair with you and take out the two suspects before things get messy.

You, on the other hand, wait for the sound of foot falls. Seconds feel like minutes, but the sound never comes. Tendou stands tall in his place and continues to scan, almost computer-like in his movements, over the area. He knows someone is there, and he fully intends on finding out who it is.

Oikawa and Iwaizumi had taken this time to move around Tendou to try and get to either Kuroo or the stranger, whichever reveals themselves first. Both of them try not to worry about you since they know you’re capable of handling the situation. They had lost some progress, having run back towards the door, but make it up in a short amount of time.

You sit and wait like livestock as the clock ticks. Can’t use portals - he would see the light. You search for a way out, but to no avail. The only hope you have is that he moves on or looks away for long enough and gives you time to break away.

Kuroo grows impatient with the lack of sound and makes his move. Slowly, he moves in a crouched position towards what he thinks is your location. His ankles pop softly under the weight of his body, but he continues to move.

Unbeknownst to him, the associate was just close enough to hear something. Quickly, the man turns and spots the same black tuft of hair you had seen just moments prior. “Tendou!”

Shit shit shit.

There’s no time. Tendou turns on a dime as the first shot rings out, the sound ricocheting off of all surfaces and causing everyone’s ears to ring - especially Oikawa who lets out a rather loud groan.

“There you are.” Eyes hungry, Tendou notes what he sees and hears from various places. In a split second decision, you decide it’s now or never and place a portal underneath yourself to the closest place you had last seen your dark haired friend.

The bright blue flash does not go unnoticed by the now eagled-eyed Tendou, who runs over to the flash, but lets out a growl when he finds no signs of anyone.

Kuroo drops down to the ground right after the initial gun fire and remains with his chest to the ground. Looking around, he can see that the bullet has lodged itself into the wall behind him, but the angle lets him know that the shooter was in a standing position from across the room.

Oikawa covers his ears and crouches in a defensive stance to try and stop the awful high-pitched ringing in his ears. Iwaizumi takes action and stands in front of him, looking for any immediate threats.

You fall right on your ass towards the back of the room, shielded by machinery and the pipes connecting them. From your position, you can’t see anyone. Quickly, you get a good grip on your gun and stand up.

Without thinking, you slam your back onto the controls for the machine and it groans as the metal pieces start to shift. Heat and steam start to emit from the machine, an orange building up at the opening which faces the doors of the building. Clicks of different cogs and wheels make the pieces of metal come to life as it only continues to get hotter in the area.

Immediately you duck into a different spot, more concerned with not being found out than the hot embers which start to fly out of the gaping maw. No one else is affected by this machinery, but the heat fills the room and causes all of the other machines and pipes to get warm, even hot to the touch.

“I don’t see you getting out of this one anytime soon. Just come out and we won’t shoot.” The stranger speaks clearly over the crackles and pops, giving away his position to everyone. You move with more haste, as you aren’t bothered with being heard, to directly across from the man. 

That would be the most logical spot for Tetsuro to be in since this guy shot first. The pipes shield your body as you move through the maze of metal.

Oikawa shuts off his gift and takes a second to recollect his thoughts, only to be distracted by the fires burning. Hajime grabs his collar only a few seconds later after the man announces his position and the two get closer to him.

“What makes you think we would do that?” Kuroo is still on the ground and shouts, lungs burning with an iron resolve.

Idiot! Fucking moron! You move faster, thoughts more focused on the fact he gave up his location just to fucking talk back. He can’t be thinking straight.

Tendou had, for the most part, stayed in his little corner since you had teleported off. He pulls a knife from his coat pocket and holds it against his palm. The new warmth doesn’t startle him, but a smirk has slowly crept over his face since they first walked into the building. He has no idea this night could be so exciting. At the sound of a new voice, he stalks closer with sure footing.

Chest still pressed against the now warm ground, Kuroo pushes up and keeps low. All he wants in this moment is to agitate these assholes enough to get them to fuck up somehow. Then we can arrest these shitheads and call it a job well done. His chest heaves with short breaths, but he doesn’t care to acknowledge it at the moment.

Another shot fires out, this one directly on the pipe Kuroo is hiding behind. It would’ve been a direct hit had the structure not been there. All agency members hearts skip a beat, and the three in motion only push themselves harder to get the fuck out of here.

“Because we’ll kill you if we have too.” Whoever this is sounds bored, like he wasn’t about to rob someone of their life. You clutch the handle of your weapon as you grit your teeth.

Iwaizumi takes this time to get closer to the suspect, Oikawa staying behind him for backup and trying to keep an eye on Tendou. As they approach, they can see a head of grey hair paired with fairly thick shoulders. The man is facing the room with his back to the pair as he speaks to Kuroo.

Just as Iwaizumi lines up a shot, Tendou creeps through the concrete jungle and peers around a corner. He spots the edge of someone’s shoe, and the grin only grows to an uncomfortable size on his face. The knife slides across his palm and he steps out into the corridor.

You are only a few meters away, seeing Kuroo’s body hunched over just out of your grasp fills your chest with hope. We can get out of here. There’s no telling whether your body moves on its own, or by your own volition you start a dead sprint to him.

But Tendou rounds the corner, a wicked toothy grin adorning his features and your heart drops as you look directly into his eyes.

Blood drips down onto the floor, its soft patters vastly overpowered by the growling of machinery. Tendou’s movements stutter, the grin dropping fast as he processes what’s in front of him. You power through the shock wracking your body and grab Kuroo’s arm.

You knew this was a possibility when you heard his voice just a few short minutes ago. You knew that everything you’ve been working for these past four and a half years would be washed down the drain if he saw you.

All that matters is that everyone gets out alive.

His body falls into step with yours as you drag him towards the heat source. He doesn’t notice the split second encounter that just happened, but lets you take him somewhere safe.

The grey haired fellow saw everything go down, and hesitated on shooting, but Iwa takes his chance and shoots his left calf muscle. He keels over immediately upon impact and lets out a howl of pain. Iwaizumi runs in the direction he saw you and Kuroo bolt off to, and Oikawa right on his heels.

“Y/N…” Your name cascades off of Tendou’s lips, a quiet whisper hidden under a cacophony of industrial instruments. The stream of blood coming from his palm slowing until the deep red contrasts against the sapphire hue burning bright around the cut. Droplets rise from his hand and the ground, the liquid now taking the shape of little needles. Hundreds of these tiny daggers surround his hand as he walks forward.

Seconds pass, but it feels like centuries before you stumble over some tools and meet up with the two boys. Oikawa looks tired, a bit of blood coming from his ear when he pants and Iwaizumi looks shaken after shooting someone for the first time in quite a while. Kuroo takes deep breaths next to Oikawa. 

“Y/N!” Your name is no longer a silent harmony. The situation finally catches up to you and you freeze in your place. Statue like, you bare a thousand yard stare as the men all look at you, two in horror and one in confusion.

No no no no no. 

His voice doesn’t sound that far off, and you know this is a do or die kind of scenario. You glance around at the floor and place a portal under all of the boys’ feet, sending them directly into the car and hoping that they don’t break any bones on the short fall down.

“Y/N no-” Oikawa tries to plead, but the portal is shut before he can convince you of anything.

Tendou rounds one last corner before standing tall and facing you, as you hold your weapon in both hands. The little pricks of blood soften and drop to the floor when he realizes it’s just you.

“So it is you…” his foot moves cautiously forward, as if asking permission to come closer.

You remain in position, but don’t give him any warnings to stop. Memories come back to you in the blink of an eye; almost five years of your life surrounded with people like Tendou and giving up your time to an organization that didn’t give a shit about you.

His mind is clouded with these memories as well. He can see you and him laughing about old jokes, going on stakeouts, messing with Ushijima. The list goes on and on. For years he thought you were dead, and now you’re here. 

Alive. 

And right within his grasp.

Two sides of the same coin come to face to face with one another. One with a longing in his heart, and the other with a heaviness in her heart that can only be compared to hatred.

“You killed those people, didn’t you?” It’s hard to make out your words. He keeps eye contact, afraid that if he blinks you’ll be gone.

“You know the drill, Y/N. They messed up. None of them knew how to keep their mouths shut and Washijo needed them gone.” His tone is as if you understood, or that you continued to care about anything the Port Mafia was doing.

“Obviously they didn’t mess up that horribly since the police couldn’t figure out why all these bodies started to appear across the city.” Venom coats your words thick, but the redhead refuses to understand why you would talk to him in such a way.

“Doesn’t matter. Washijo told all of the executives to move out. You remember how he is, don’t you?” He inches closer and you take a step back.

“Yeah. He was deranged and obsessed with taking over Yokohama.”

“No, you got it wrong. He wants what’s best for Yokohama and he just has to take care of a few things before it’s ours.”

“Ours?! You seriously bought in to his stupid fucking show and dance?!”

“Always so vulgar Y/N.” He shakes his head. “We could’ve had Yokohama years ago if you had just stayed.”

“And why would I have done that?” You pause and wait for his retort, but nothing comes. “The mafia gave me nothing after years of service. I dedicated my life to it, and I got fucking nothing. At least when I’m a detective I can help the people.”

His expressions turns sour as you speak, a nasty snarl displaying instead. “They gave you a home, food, water, a family! Those things really don’t mean anything to you?”

“Not when it costs innocent lives.” You clench your jaw and look at him with disgust. In his own head, he refuses to believe that this is you; that this is his Y/N.

His partner had crawled his way to you both in the meantime, careful not to bump his leg. When you finally take a look at him, it registers that it is Osamu Miya. The last time you had seen him, he was just a foot soldier. You can see that he’s hardened over the years, now trying to secure a spot amongst the top ranks if he hasn’t already.

A phone is placed over his ears, you’re sure it’s for backup and you don’t hesitate to create a portal under you. Tendou jolts forward and tries to snatch any part of you he can, but you fall into the driver's seat of the car with a grunt.

Oikawa and Kuroo are in the back, looking at you with wide eyes as Iwaizumi asks if you are okay.

“They called backup,” you say. He whispers something out of frustration, but you don’t bother to pay attention as you shove the keys into the car harshly and throw it into drive. Kuroo’s body tosses around like a ragdoll in the back, having not braced himself for the sudden motion. Oikawa grips the overhead handle and Iwaizumi the dash.

Tires screech as you make a sharp turn out of the parking lot. Another shot rings out, but misses. You check the rearview and see a blur of red hair standing at the door of the facility.

“What the fuck is going on?!” Kuroo demands after adjusting himself to sit properly.

No one answers his call, instead choosing to focus on the surrounding area for potential threats. You focus on driving through the dark streets and finding a quick and inconspicuous way back to the agency. Hajime keeps an eye on the right side of the vehicle, while Tooru covers the left.

Kuroo’s jaw falls open, he’s never felt more ignored in his entire life. “Hello!?”

A vehicle swings itself around a corner behind you all, the immediate sound of gunshots doing nothing to conceal its presence. Oikawa sticks his weapon out of the window and starts to fire back with pot shots, Kuroo ducks down and covers his head.

Glass shatters across the backseat, the back windshield now scattered after being hit with several bullets. You and Hajime try your best to use the head rests as decent enough cover in the meantime.

“Get the tires idiot!” You shout over the thousands of different noises. Through your side mirror, you can see the car behind you is a black SUV - standard for the Port Mafia. The decent thing about those is that they are raised higher from the ground than most other cars, and therefore makes it easier to lodge a bullet either into the vehicle or its tires.

Kuroo stays hunched over, curled into a ball from the initial shots. What the fuck is going on?! His heart beats in his throat, but he’s frozen. His muscles don’t move. He can’t help.

Does he want to help? Who’s in the right?

Who are you?

Another SUV appears in front of you, slowing to bump its bumper with your own. Hajime props himself fully on the car door with the window rolled all the way down. With his gift, Man of Steel, he can virtually protect himself from almost anything - from gunshots to C4, his skin won’t have as much as a scratch on it as long as his gift is being consciously used.

His arms prop themselves on the roof of the car, using it as a sort of tripod to steady his aim against the intense wind. He takes a deep breath in, and once he holds for a second or two, he fires. The bullet doesn’t even scratch the car, and he silently cusses when he exhales and prepares for the next one.

You maneuver the car between your pursuers, but as each second passes you start to psych yourself out. If these two can’t hit their marks then we’re fucked. Big time.

“Hajime!” He slinks back into the seat as he looks to you. “Switch me.”

Fully understanding, he leaves the gun on the dash and leans forward. Kuroo watches the exchange go down, finally prying his eyes open. With trained ease, you push on the gas pedal hard before releasing quickly and sliding over to the passengers seat with your legs pulled up to your chest. Hajime steps over, foot hitting the gas first to ensure there’s still movement before he slams into the seat.

You grab the handgun and get into the same position he was in just a couple seconds ago. The wind beats against your face, nose and cheeks becoming red instantly from the cold. With a trained gaze, you line up the shot and follow a similar procedure, taking a deep breath in, holding and closing one eye before taking the shot.

The bullet flies through the air, a millisecond passes before the car in front swerves drastically and crashes just off to the right of you in the forest. In a flash, the scene is longer on your mind as you turn your attention to the last remaining problem.

Tooru continues to pop off shots from inside the vehicle, more concerned with his body than his counterpart. Hajime speeds up the car, shifting into the next gear since there’s nothing blocking your way. The hunk of metal jerks unceremoniously and everyone's heads bob and sway.

Your hands clutch the handle right above the window door, but you decide in a split second that you need to take a risk in order to get away from these freaks as soon as possible. One hand remains white knuckled on the handle, but one of your knees adjusts itself onto the area where the window goes down. This position allows you to see higher above the car, and clearly see the SUV tailing you.

“Y/N!” Hajime sees you moving around in his peripheral, but once he turns to look at you his body is wracked with panic. A hand grips the ankle of the other leg. As if it’s going to do anything if you fall.

This time around, you don’t have anything to steady yourself on and you only have one hand on the gun. With it in the air, you close one eye and take a steady breath in. You shoot before you can hold it in, and the bullet grazes the side mirror.

The men inside, who were focused on Oikawa, now see you practically hanging out of the car. Their focus shifts entirely to you, but you’re able to get a second, and last, shot off.

Once more, the car spins out of control and lands itself amidst the trees. Smoke erupts from the smashed engine, but they are out of sight in a matter of seconds.

You slide back into the car, Iwaizumi releases your ankle and lets a sigh of relief pass his lips. Tooru wipes glass shards off of his seat and leans back, letting the wind cool down the intense heat.

Kuroo remains silent. His gut tells him that even if he was to ask any questions, none of you would answer. He plays the scene from the manufacturing building in his head a thousand times. Why did the Port Mafia know your name?

You don’t even have to look at him to know that he’s processing. “Kuroo.” He looks up, but isn’t met with your face but rather the back of your head. You don’t have it in you to look at him, knowing that he has a decent idea of what’s going on. “We can talk once we get back to the agency, but for now we gotta make sure it’s safe.”

“Yeah.” It comes out as a breath. Oikawa watches the interaction and can see the betrayal in his eyes.

“You can ask any questions you want,” you say. Hajime side-eyes you at the proclamation. “You deserve to know.”

[rairaidango]

SEEDS THAT GROW - madasaku, tobisaku, ita(ma)saku, sasusaku

CHAPTER 1 - GOOD THINGS

First chapter of the AU I have in my head. I’m just testing the waters because I’m not sure about continuing this because it’d be pr long? Like long, and maybe slow burn? It’d be a studentxteacher AU bc i’m a sucker for those. Hurt/comfort, but has depressing themes. Angsty? Dont know if its worth writing bc I’m not a writer at all i’m not good at it but I’m giving it a shot !!

TW: Depressing themes, mentions of anxiety, doing drugs and alcohol

It was loud in the house, but at least it was a familiar kind of loud that she could appreciate. People were laughing and yelling and it wasn’t ideal for Sakura, but she was excited to be going out partying. It was rare for her to feel excited about most things but clubbing on freshers week was definitely an opportunity she wanted to take advantage of; she just wanted so badly to have fun again. 

“Sakura! I have more vodka, pass me your cup! I know you’re aiming to get wasted tonight babe!” Ino dragged Sakura to her side of the kitchen counter.

“Honestly, not complaining! I NEED to get drunk, lets go!!” Sakura hollered as Ino poured her a large amount of vodka and mixed it with not enough lemonade. Ino may be an experienced clubber, but she never mixed her drinks right and that’s how Ino always ended up puking by the end of the night.

Not that Ino ever really regretted it though, she lived on the edge. 

More, I want to drink more. Note, get some soju next time to get fucked fast. 4 badly mixed drinks in, she knew she was tipsy and her giggling wasn’t starting to make sense. She was relatively lightweight, but that just meant it was easier for her to get to everyone’s levels. All the girls were laughing, even Hinata was starting to get loud over the music. Sakura was getting more excited by the minute and her smiles were getting wider by the second. This is going to be a fun night. 

“Shall we leave now? If we leave now I think we’ll get in by decent time where we won’t be too late or early.” Tenten spoke loudly over the music. “Plussss I think all of us are on a good level of drunk to dance it out tonight!”

“Oh shit I’ll call an uber now-”

“Wait!! Do it in 5 minutes Temari! I got a present for y’all before our first sem of second year starts..” Ino smiled wickedly. The girls looked at her brows furrowed, unsure of what Ino was leading on to. “Oh come on!! You know! I got some from Shika and for a discount!” Sakura’s eyes widened, she knew exactly what Ino was on about.

“Woah, already? Honestly I forgot we had even tried that in first year!” Sakura smiled as her face fell into her hands, she was even more excited now. “I’ll have just a little okay, because I’m honestly...really tipsy..” Ino grabbed Sakura’s hands and placed the budding joint between her delicate numb fingers. 

“I’ll have me some of that please and thank you! I can’t believe Shikamaru gave it to you for a cheap price! Bitch you’ve been banging him haven’t you?!” Tenten roared across the counter in their kitchen. Wicked was the face Ino plastered on but she simply answered with a zip of her lips. 

“Call the uber!”

It was going to be a night to remember.

--

Lights flashed and Stormzy’s Vossi Bop boomed loudly throughout the club, causing a large roar of students jumping and yelling. Drinks were flying everywhere and the floor was sticky with alcohol, but the girls wouldn’t have preferred it any other way. 

“Oh my god. Ino! Shikamaru is there looking over at you!” Sakura whispered loudly to the blonde’s ears. Ino’s face, already red from alcohol, turned even redder at the mention of the boy’s name. “Go oveerrr come on I know how much you love making out-”

“Shut up forehead!” Ino shouted. She was dancing in the circle of their group squashed by the many other students all jumping and dancing over the loud R&B music. “Okay I’m gonna go over, will you be okay?”

“Of course! I’m not drunk!”

“Yes you are!” Ino laughed. “Finish that drink of yours! That’s like what you’re seventh?” Ino yelled to Sakura’s ear.

“Sakura’s on a mission tonight!” Temari yelled from the centre of their circle and jumped to the music.

Sakura nodded her head grinning as she downed the glass sloppily with the alcohol spilling from her mouth. Sakura was feeling good. Her body was feeling alive with the music, she was having fun, she was with people she loved and trusted, and she couldn’t feel anything but the music on her skin and alcohol on her lips. 

“I’ll be fine!” Sakura reassured her with slurring words, with Hinata and Tenten pulling Sakura closer into their group. Ino nodded and winked at the girls, leaving their tight circle and squeezing her way towards Shikamaru. Sakura wondered how fun it must feel to be chased and wanted the way Ino was. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t miss the feeling of hands over her waist and the broad shoulders of-

No. Nope. Remember that’s a baaaad trigger and we aren’t going there! 

“Girls shall we get more drinks? Temari’s only tipsy!” Tenten shouted. 

“More drinks!?” Hinata squealed, barely able to hide her own drunken state. 

“Me and Temari will get some, you guys can choose if you want to! But I don’t think Sakura should have anymore.” Tenten laughed looking at Sakura’s slanted smile and red face. 

At the bar it was less crowded, but not by much. The girls had to hold hands and squeeze through people otherwise they’d lose each other in the sea of alcoholic students. Sakura was holding on to Hinata for dear life, pushing people away as she tried to get to the bar. She was just almost there with the girls, until suddenly she was seeing the floor and a pair of strong arms caught her.

“Shit, are you alright?” a soothing voice woke Sakura from her heavy eyes. 

She blinked slightly trying to make the image of the man in front of her, but she couldn’t recognise him. Her vision was so misconstrued and she could barely make out where in the club she was. “Hey, hey, don’t worry, just get up slowly.” the voice told her.

Who...what...who is this? Where’s Tenten? Hinata? Her thoughts ran as she stood up and was pushed into the man in front of her. Ugh...Sakura, remember this, you fell..and..soothing voice. Tall man. Is that black hair?? There’s a certain shine to it... She squinted her eyes trying to focus on the man as her vision kept swaying. Her head was pounding and the club was changing, moving, morphing... but the man was steady in front of her, his eyes looking right at her amongst the chaos of the club. It’s so dark…

She moved closer to him to smell the alcohol on his mouth. Her mouth curved into a small slight smile as she giggled in front of him, not sure of what she was doing. 

“Yeah i’m fine, but...so are you.” she giggled over the music, her voice getting higher by the end of her sentences. She couldn’t really see anything and she could barely hear her own thoughts over the loud blasting music but she could feel his hands on her back. It was innocent, but she liked the warm feeling. The touch, the feel, the electricity.

Maybe it was because she was drunk, but she snaked her arms onto his shoulders and drew her face closer. She wanted to feel more. In the club everything was blurry, she could feel him, and his hands snaked a little lower to her waist. 

“I like..the way you look.” She slurred, her face inches away from his. She could barely even see his face in the dark, but handsome was all she could think of. She saw a smile, or maybe it was a smirk, hell she didn’t know. 

“You’re very drunk.” 

“I know.” He laughed.

“Where are your friends?”

“The bar...”

“Okay, let’s get you back safe to them-” He stopped as her lips crashed onto his. Her body was pressed against his and she could hear him grunting. He didn’t push her away, but she could feel he was hesitant. 

That was, until he hugged her tight and let her tongue slip in. He tasted sweet, but poisonous. She could taste the alcohol in his mouth mixed with a sweetness that tasted foreign. Her hands slid behind his neck and into his hair as he pushed his mouth against hers even harder. It felt so good, and there was a rush of adrenaline rising in Sakura’s body on top of every other intoxication that was swirling inside her. 

Sakura remember this, remember this...you made out with this tall man, he smells like…citrus?

She tightened her hold on his hair, desperate to fall in this delightful, hazy and hot moment. She almost forgot what a hot makeout session with someone felt and tasted like; oh how she fucking missed this.

He pulled back with heavy breaths; his eyes and large hands were still on her, and she felt so at large in this fuzzy busy place swamped with other drunks. She was catching her breath as well whilst trying to get a hold of her vision. She looked down and noticed just how close they really were, and how much bigger than her he really was. 

He chuckled, a small goofy grin on his face. 

He was really cute. 

“Sakura! There you are- HEY GET OFF HER!” Sakura whipped her head in a daze to the familiar voice.

“Temari?” The said girl yanked the pink haired student away from the arms of the man. Sakura fell back into Temari’s hold giggling cheekily, glancing at the other girls.

“Sakura are you okay? Sorry I let go, you just fell and then I couldn't find you because of all the people!” Hinata cried out.

“Did the man hurt you?” Tenten asked.

“Nope!” Sakura chuckled. She was clearly drunk, and if her literally hanging onto Temari’s shoulders wasn’t enough indication of her alcoholic state, her red blushed face definitely said ‘drunk’.

“Sorry to trouble you, hope she’s fine.” He turned to the drunk girl he had the pleasure of making out with. “Happy I caught you.” He grinned, and slipped past the dancing crowd.

All she remembered was seeing a glimmer of red before her vision had darkened and faded to black.

--

“Alright, so make sure to study this chapter for next week’s class. And a reminder, all of you should have started your assignment this week even though we’re only two weeks in. I expect good work.” 

Sakura typed out the notes on the projection. This was her last class of the day, and thank god it was because she was exhausted. Second year had started more like a rollercoaster than first year had; she was ready to get into her books and assignments but this was another level of crazy. It sucked to be frank. She was excited to get back to studying and really wanted to do well, she had the motivation to excel like how she would normally be able to. However, she hasn’t been able to locate that person. She wasn’t failing, but she wasn’t working at her usual efficient standards and this was not a Sakura that she wanted to be. 

But it’s the Sakura she has been for over a year now. 

“Haruno Sakura?” a deep voice called. She looked up from her bag and saw her professor. 

“Yes sir?”

“You don’t have to call me sir, just Madara is fine. No need for that, you're in second year.” He said calmly with a slight smile. Sakura nodded and smiled embarrassingly. “About the introductory session you volunteered to help with, are you still doing that?”

Ah fuck. Sakura totally forgot about that. She had signed up to help volunteer with the session for people aspiring to do medicine in University of Konoha. 

“Yes sir- uh Madara.” The name felt weird in her mouth. 

“Okay, good. There’s a meeting later today at 5pm, you should have gotten an email about it?”

“I must have missed it, sorry. It’s been really hectic but I’ll definitely be there.”

“I understand, it’s very different from the first year experience isn’t it?” he chuckled, arms crossed.

“It really is, but I’ll be fine. And I’ll be there today at 5pm.” she repeated, not so much to reassure Madara but more to remind herself. 

“Alright, I’ll see you later. Keep up the work.” He waved off as he walked away. Sakura let out a breath she was holding. She didn’t know Madara very well but had occasionally passed by him in first year. He was a very tall man with a brooding face, but he wasn’t very scary in all honesty. He was actually quite friendly for the serious face he had.

It was just Sakura who was anxious speaking to people.

You’d think at 21, in her second year of university, having done 3 months of an internship with the well known Konoha Hospital shadowing the famous Tsunade, that she would be confident enough to talk to her professor. Even her coursemates. Or really, anyone. That guy who works for the sim card company. The cafeteria people. Honestly, this was a problem for her. She was always so anxious when there was a conversation she hadn’t planned on having; but it wasn’t always like this. At least she doesn’t sound anxious, she could fake the confidence.

She was out of the medical building and on her way to the cafe street where she would meet Ino. She needed to just talk. 

Kokoro Kafe was their meeting spot. She entered the softly illuminated cafe. Smiling to herself, she remembered why this was their meeting spot. It was adorned with gold lined lights hanging from variable lengths, pink and grey walls with pink LED lights; all of it was so very pretty. The serving counter and cashier were situated in the centre of the large cafe, like an island amongst the sea of pink and yellow lights. It had such an urban but almost angelic atmosphere to it, making it very welcoming for the many students and teachers of UoK. 

“Forehead!” a blonde with a high ponytail that could only be Ino, stood up waving. Sakura smiled, jogging to the back of the cafe. “I ordered you your fave, mint chocolate chip ice cream and sprinkles on top. I also got a large hot coco to share because you look like you need it!” Ino exclaimed, pushing the hot coco with frothy whip cream towards Sakura.

“It’s honestly just been such a long day. I had Kakashi from 9 to 12 and then Madara from 12.30 to 3.30? I’m just exhausted. I barely slept last night because I was trying to get through my damn assignment. Honestly I don’t know how you girls are not as stressed out as me..” The pink haired girl let out an exasperated sigh sipping the hot coco.

“I saw your lights on last night, at like...5am? Are you overworking already? Babe I’m really worried about you. You were alright before uni started.”

“I guess yeah I was...I don’t really know Ino it’s just...I don’t know why I’m like this.”

“Have you talked to your therapist yet?” worried features dawned on Ino’s face.

Their usual chatter bounced off each other and was filled with gossip and laughter. But silence ensued between the two friends. 

“I haven’t…”

“When was the last time?”

“I...a while ago. I just, I don’t know if I trust her anymore she’s not very helpful. She validates my feelings but I don’t feel like she’s really wanting to help me figure it out.”

Ino looked at her best friend. Ino’s grown up with Sakura ever since they were little, and she’s seen how bad things can get for her best friend. She’s seen Sakura go through some really hard times, and she knows Sakura had found therapy really tough.

“I don’t want to push you Sakura…just let me know when you’re comfortable, if you’ve started to talk to a new therapist or…” Sakura knew what was coming, closed her eyes, and sucked in a breath. “The student welfare office is actually really good.”

Sakura opened her eyes and looked down at the hot coco. “I know...I’ve been wanting to contact them for a while now…”

“I’ll come with you. And the other girls would love to come and support you as well, you know we got your back babe.” Ino’s hands touched Sakura’s on the table, reassuring her. “We just want the best for you.”

Hearing such supportive words was not uncommon, but it didn’t feel normal for Sakura. It was hard to accept the support, the love and belief that Sakura could get better. Her jaw was tight and there was a very uncomfortable feeling sitting in her stomach.

They just want the best for you...you know they do. They’ve always been there for you and...they won’t leave. Come on Sakura you know they won’t. Sakura looked at the girl in front of her. They...want the best for me. And believing that is okay...because..I deserve support.

“I’ll email student welfare...tonight?” Sakura said, each word coming out slowly as she was unsure of this promise. Her breath was stuck in her throat, like she was being choked as she continued to ponder on the thought of her friends supporting her. She knew this was a trauma response. 

“And we’ll be there. Or just me if you want okay?” Ino smiled with concerned eyes. “You deserve support, and you deserve good things.”

A tear ran down Sakura’s cheek. 

She deserved good things.

“Ah, speaking of good things, your ice cream!” 

--

Shit it’s almost 5pm! 

Sakura jogged her way to the student union past the small garden of flowers on campus. 

Student Union, alright. And 10 minutes to spare!

Small hands pushed the door open to reveal at least 20 other students all chit chatting and lounging in chairs. It was still bright outside, but the union was buzzing like it was 3pm in the afternoon. Sakura looked around, hoping to spot someone she’d recognise.

Are all of these volunteers from my year? I don’t even recognise any of these faces. she huffed as she found an empty seat by the edge of a table that seemed unoccupied. Okay Sakura breathe, nothing to be afraid of. Just talk, be happy, it’s fine, you won’t even see these people again after this week.

“Oh hey, sorry but are these seats taken?” a honeyed voice parroted. 

“Ah, no not at all!” Sakura nervously smiled and gestured for the boy and his friends to sit. The boy smiled. He had odd hair, as in, it looked mismatched. brown hair and white highlights? And Sakura thought her pink hair stood out. 

“I’m Itama by the way. And this is Shisui and Itachi.” Sakura blinked at them. She knew those names.

“Oh! You’re Sasuke’s brother aren’t you?” Sakura said, a bit loudly and excitedly. “I’m Sa-” she stopped herself. “I’m a friend of Sasuke’s.” 

Itachi, the tallest one amongst the three and definitely the oldest looking, smiled in amusement.

“OH what! You know Sasuke?” The Itama boy chirped. 

“I think I have seen you around before..” Itachi thought. “No, I’ve definitely seen you around.” his words weren’t hostile, but Itachi was definitely trying to piece it together in his head.

“Are you on the medical degree?” the one with curly hair, Shisui she noted, asked. 

“Yeah, I’m a second year.” She found it quite easy to continue this conversation, though unexpected. It wasn’t making her as anxious as she usually would feel in these scenarios. She’s also quite good at hiding though. 

“Ah, Madara is our uncle, he asked us to help out with this whole schbang of a taster session.” Shisui rolled his eyes. “But Itama-”

“I’m in my third year doing medicine. Nice to meet you, I definitely recognise you with the pink hair in the medicine building.” Itama mused, ignoring Shisui’s pointed look. Itachi just chuckled. 

“Nice to meet you guys. I won't lie, I was a little nervous sitting all alone.” she sighed.

“Awh, well I promise Itachi, Itama and I aren’t nasty-”

“I think I might even recognise you from a night out?”

Sakura choked. 

[ri-ships-takari]

digimon adventure: ep 1-2, an illustrated raw reaction

starting Adventure: (2020) and ???? wtf ?????? (ep1-2 spoilers below)

1. our war game???

Our War Game! rehash????? the missile ??? the clutch countdown ??? bootleg but somehow stronger diaboromon??? OMEGA-FUCKING-MON.

MAMSIR. IT IS. THE SECOND EPISODE.

WHAT ARE WE DOING FOR THE REST OF THE SERIES

IF YALL BRINGIN OUT THE LAST UNIVERSE’S BADDEST BITCH

IN THE

SECOND

EPISODE

I JUST WANNA KNOW

2. and yamato ???

i knew he was a provincial kid here but what does he know ?? how long has he been here ??

im also so much for provincial yamato ngl but also does that mean we dont get hiroaki ishida cause aw mann

a moment of silence for this scene that cant happen with a provincial hiroaki [gif from ladyanatui]

and all his other great reactions and fuji tv misadventures

lets not forget this gem [gif from adventure-hearts]

great yaboi still plays the bass tho (apparently, the ending just made it abundantly clear this is his branding for some reason)

im not quite sure it makes up for the hiroaki erasure tho

3. taichi, the favorite child (and yamato the close second)

tbh idk why im surprised but its just the first ep and i see what everyone means. i mean, he gets almost the whole opening, with cute lil running sequence. yamato, second favorite, gets a town tour in the ending. the non-faves are crammed as a group in some blink or you’ll miss it sequences

adventure 1999 had a bit more balance in its focus, clearly emphasizing that it was an ensemble show, but maybe that’s just one way 2020 is trying to differentiate itself

ngl i do miss the focus on the group though. i think it aligned nicely with the theme of opening up and relying on your friends. not sure what 2020 is going for in terms of themes except for some boom boom pow pew pew energy, but i guess we’re in for that ride.

4. the tone is so different

adventure 1999 immediately threw us right into the action too, but the tone was a bit more relaxed. there was a sense of awe and discovery in the first few eps. i think in 1999 we had some time to breathe, but adventure: 2020 just goes gung ho here’s a side of runaway locomon. now have some nuclear fallout.

i appreciate the pains taken to differentiate it from 1999 in this respect tho, and recognize that a slow opening like adventure 1999 might not work in Japan’s media landscape of 2020 just okay fam when do we breathe doe

5. takeru and hikari got some tsubasa shit goin on

i appreciate the hinting on what will probably be some holy digimon lore (which i think we didnt get enough explanation for in 1999/2002) but also i just cant not think of tsubasa reservoir chronicles

digimon adventure:

tsubasa: reservoir chronicles

me:

thats all for now. will see if i could finish 2020 this year but boi these first 2 eps were a ride

[subwalls]

WHUMPTOBER 2021 - 4/30

No. 4 - TRUST FALL “Do you trust me?” | taken hostage | pushed

Also available on AO3!

 Sapnap’s day starts off with his shitty apartment flooding ankle-deep in unidentifiable monsterly fluids, which sucks.

 It’s not as dangerous as that one time the whole building came alive and tried to eat its residents, but it’s definitely messier, which is arguably worse.

 This is the kind of thing most people usually take as a sign from the universe that they should go over to a friend’s place and sulk for the rest of the day. Anyone who’s survived more than a week in this clusterfuck of a city knows to trust their instincts on that—which usually means getting the hell out of dodge.

 Unfortunately, Sapnap has kind of garbage instincts.

 Oh, they’re fantastic at keeping him alive, sure. He’s coming up on his one-year anniversary of being here, and he’ll definitely be celebrating that at one of those dubiously legal and definitely non-human bars, but the fact that he’s      still     here, squelching through monster goop and all…

 Sapnap wrinkles his nose as he sidesteps the still-twitching corpse in the lobby. Some idiot with an organ graft from the End, probably, which explains the goop seeping into everything. Shouldn’t the drawbacks of End tissue be common knowledge by know? Specifically the fact that it implodes at the first hint of water?

 Most apartment complexes these days have sprinklers installed on the doorstep for the explicit purpose of enforcing their dumb Huma-only policies.

 Sapnap, with his Netherborn lungs, counts himself lucky. He looks Huma,      is    legally Huma, and can hold his breath when the sprinkler douses him. So his landlord’s none the wiser.

 Probably.

 Eh, if he was going to be evicted for that, it would’ve already happened. Work comes first, and if Sapnap’s lucky, he’ll be too worn out to even notice if they’ve cleaned up the mess by the time he comes back.

 He pats the left side of his face, checking that his eyepatch is in place like it should be, and walks out into the thoroughfare of SMP City.

 Immediately, the world drops out from under him. Sapnap whirls around, reaching out for the wall that should be right there, but the thin clouds slip through his fingers without so much as a whisper of substance.

 The wind forces his good eye shut. He forces it open again, squinting, all too aware of the warmth smoldering in his chest. His vision blurs weirdly in a way that could’ve been from wind pressure or because he’s been out for longer than he thinks. After a few seconds of blinking furiously, it clears.

 Oh. That’s not the sky.

 That’s the void.

 Those are two very different things. One is up, and the other is… well. All around the city, truthfully; it swallows the ocean and heaven alike into the dragon’s maw, marking out the abyssal boundary of where the other worlds bleed into this one.

 It’s part of what makes commute in and out of the place troublesome, because too-big vehicles that get too close end up attacked by the aforementioned dragon—not that anyone’s every seen the whole breadth of the thing, just an errant wing or tail that swings up to demolish a plane or ship, black scales iridescent against the darkness.

 The fact that Sapnap is standing on a platform in the middle of this beast’s territory is, as they say, Not Good.

 Leaning over the edge, Sapnap sees no support holding up the square of rock he’s somehow ended up on. It’s just floating over the misty emptiness. Looking up yields nothing of note either; he must be pretty low in the void if he can only see the wispy fog instead of the surface.

 Something silver flashes at the edge of his vision, and Sapnap ducks out of the way of a shattered blade. His cheek flares, and he slaps a hand against it, wincing.

 The metal tumbles into the void. Sapnap pulls his hand away, and blinks at the smear of blood left behind.

 “GREETINGS,” bellows out from somewhere overhead. A long scythe of a blade lowers from the fog, and Sapnap backs up to the edge of his floating rock as its tip comes to a gentle rest over his throat.

 “Why am I here?” Sapnap demands. He slouches backward, sticking his hands into his pockets like the perfect image of a begrudged student. If it’s to hide the trembling of his arms, that’s a secret between him and the phone in his pocket. “Who are you?”

 “I AM UNKNOWN, COLLECTOR OF DIVINE INSTRUMENTS, PROSTHESIS MADE BY THE GREATER POWERS,” the voice booms. “I AM HERE TO COLLECT YOURS.”

 “Uh, divine what now?” Sapnap says. He presses his thumb against the cool screen of his phone, making sure it’s facing towards himself so the light doesn’t bleed out. “I don’t know what those are. You’ve got the wrong person.”

 The scythe jerks upward, nicking open his chin, trailing up his face.

 And comes to rest directly over his eyepatch.

 Sapnap stills.

 “THE ALL-SEEING EYES OF THE GODS.”

 “What about them?”

 “YOU HAVE THEM. OR SO I THOUGHT,” the voice adds, and the scythe withdraws a little. “I DID THINK YOU FELL FOR THAT TRAP TOO EASILY FOR A TRUE WIELDER… IT WAS EITHER YOU OR YOUR SYNDICATE FRIEND, THEY SAID, AND THE FANG HUNTER IS MORE TROUBLE THAN I’D LIKE.”

 Syndicate friend. Fang hunter.      Dream.     Sapnap's heart plummets to his heels, but he tries to keep an even keel. “Who’s they?” he asks over the sound of his phone unlocking. As subtly as possible, he drags his thumb across the screen.

 “AH, NOW THAT WOULD BE TELLING, WOULDN’T IT?” A low cackle rolls through the fog like thunder, ruby light flashing faintly in the distance. “OF COURSE, IF YOU GIVE ME WHAT I WANT, I WILL GLADLY TELL.”

 “You… want to take the Eyes,” Sapnap says, slowly.

 “I DO.” A metallic      click     echoes overhead, and two more scythes descend, grinding against each other in a thin shriek of metal on metal. “BUT IF YOU ARE NOT THE ONE WHO WIELDS THEM…”

 Inhale, feel the air warm in his throat, embers into flame. “What’re you gonna do,” Sapnap says, “kill me?”

 “AND WASTE SUCH A RESOURCE? NO, NO. YOU ARE BEST KEPT HERE,” Unknown says, amused. Another blade comes low, and clinks against the phone in his pocket. Sapnap freezes. “GO ON. ASK YOUR FRIEND TO SAVE YOU. CALL THEM HERE. THESE THINGS ARE ALWAYS EASIER TO NEGOTIATE FACE TO FACE.”

 Well now he doesn’t want to do it.

 Sapnap snorts, and a tongue of flame washes over the back of his teeth. “I’m not going to be your good little hostage,” he spits.

 “BUT YOU ALREADY ARE,” says Unknown, and the scythes all turn to slam into the rock.

 Ruptures tear across the surface of the stone, and Sapnap swears as he quickly shuffles onto the biggest piece. The edge crumbles away; far below, the fog shifts. A dull purple glow starts to brighten in the abyss, a tell-tale sign of the dragon waking, and Sapnap throws himself at the scythe in preparation to climb up the weapon-limb if he must—

 His vision      sings.    

 Suddenly, the world takes on a blue tint. Everything jumps into high-definition, and the fog might as well not exist, and Sapnap can see the arching crimson light of a      fucking Blood Breed     looming above him, Unknown is a      Blood Breed,     Sapnap doesn’t stand a chance even if he can read out the letters of their true name from the red aura surrounding them—he looks away, and notices for the first time the golden threads spanning the width of the void, glittering with magic.

 In the back of his mind, he registers that he’s looking at the spell that stopped the Great Collapse, the one that saved the worlds from folding in on each other into utter destruction.

 The rest of his mind is a little busy      screaming,     though.

 A displeased snarl rips through the air as another set of scythes cleave down towards him, and Sapnap exhales a spout of flame that slows them down only barely enough to dodge.

 “OH,” says Unknown, “OH, OH! IS THAT AN EYE? YOU      DO     HAVE ONE! I DIDN’T KNOW YOU COULD HIDE THE GODS’ GIFT LIKE THAT—YOU MUST LET ME HAVE IT, HUMA, IT IS WASTED IN YOUR SOCKET!”

 Sapnap shouts, “You can take it over my dead body!” and throws himself at the ground when a blade tries to cut him in half at the hip.

 “GLADLY!” Unknown dives, now, their nebulous aura now a very clear and vivid blood-red glare into Sapnap’s vision, ruby light spinning down their bony weapon-limbs like latticework.

 Sapnap doesn’t flinch, and even swings his head upward to let the Eye watch and watch and watch—thinking      this is what I go through for you     with only half the bitterness he really feels—which is the only reason he notices the other one.

 Two Blood Breeds in a single day. Fan-fucking-tastic.

 A blade pins him through the shoulder in a burst of hot-eyed pain, but the rest all      miss     as a thin red string wraps around Unknown’s limbs and yanks them upward, into the low-hanging mist.

 Sapnap blinks. He can still see them, thrashing against a thread that yanks Unknown around like a plaything before throwing them aside. It’s connected to the second Blood Breed, which is descending towards him now.

 Okay, okay, it’s fine, he has a little time. A Blood Breed’s weakness is their true name, so if he can just extract that, he might be able to… burn it, or something.

 Sapnap takes a deep breath, gives his vision the middle finger just so the other end of the Eye can see it, and then focuses      hard     on that deep red aura.

 For the most part, it’s just a storm of crimson, red and red and ruby and blood, but Sapnap keeps      looking     and his one working eye whirs like a machine as it narrows, cutting through the noise, piercing down until he can see the heart and the core and… at the very end, a thin string of letters in a language he shouldn’t know.

 The All-Seeing Eye of the Gods pours it all into his head:       red red crimson-winged elder ⍊𝙹╎ᓵᒷ↸╎⍊ᒷ ᓵ∷ᔑℸ ̣ ╎リᒷ ⍑||!¡╎ ̇/ᒷꖌ ℸ ̣ ᒷᓵ⍑リ𝙹ʖꖎᔑ↸ᒷred blood red red war red—  

 “Tech—” he begins, and promptly chokes as a hand slaps over his mouth.

 “Shush,” says the Blood Breed, calm as anything, quite suddenly right beside him. “Yeah, I got there in time, of course I did. Hey, you’re Sapnap, right?”

 Sapnap tries to melt him on pure force of will alone.

 “I’m gonna let go of you now. Maybe don’t be rude and expose me in front of an idiot like that, alright?” The Blood Breed exaggeratedly steps back, and Sapnap immediately flings himself to the opposite side of the very tiny floating rock they’re standing on. “Great, cool, nice talk. Not awkward at all.”

 “What do you want?” Sapnap demands, bristling.

 “You don’t recognize me?”

 Sapnap pauses. He gives the Blood Breed another once-over, taking in the plush red cape and royal garb. Looks at the name again. Nothing rings a bell. “Should I?”

 “Eh. Guess not. We’re a little short on time anyway, so introductions can wait, I guess.” As if on cue, the void begins to rumble. The dragon must be      inches     from rushing out.

 Sapnap waves his hand through what he’s sure is a gear of light blue energy rotating in front of his face, trying to tell his friend to let it go. He doesn’t want him to watch him die.

 The Blood Breed interrupts him with a hand on his wrist. “Hey. Do you trust me?”

 “Hell no.”

 “Smart,” the Blood Breed says, and shoves him off the edge.

[these-are-the-first-steps]

“The Rise of Skywalker”- A Review from Memory

So it’s been a week since I’ve had to live with this film in front of my eyes, and a week and a half that I’ve had to grapple with the brunt of its sins. With a heavy sigh, I think I’m ready to go through the play-by-play of every plot hole in this film that I can manage from memory without the thing in front of me. And even then, the laundry list is hefty. Keep in mind that this is a FILM-BASED review only- I have tried to refrain from including new information we have learned since its release last Thursday in an effort to keep this as focused and topical as possible.

+The first scene of this film is weird. I’m all for watching Adam Driver wild out on some dudes, but it is never explained who these guys are and if it’s just Kylo ‘committing more slaughter’ (as the casual audience is wont to think) or if there’s something significant here. As the movie goes on and Kylo makes it clear that he’s under no one’s thumb, *and* that the object he was after was Sith, you start to get an idea that maybe those guys at the intro are No Good, but this is never explained or confirmed. To a casual audience with no interest in additional materials, it just looks like Bad Ole Kylo Doing More Bad Ole Stuff. *sigh*

+Exogol and Palpatine’s hideout looks like the Borg Cube from Star Trek: First Contact from 1996. This really smacked me in the face how similar it was.

+Snoke’s significance getting sniped by Palpatine in one fell swoop felt like two five year olds arguing over action figures in the sandbox. “No! He’s dead now! Now the good guys can go on their quest!” “Well if he’s dead now, it’s only because MY guy was the REAL bad guy! DOOSHDOOSHDOOSHDOOSH!!” Like….really? At least Palpatine’s never-spoken-of Snoke manufacturing lab was vaguely interesting. Too bad we never saw anything about that- what a story of intergalactic puppet-masters that would have made! We’re not here for clever storytelling, though, so moving on…

+I don’t think they should have included Leia in this film. It really added to the disjointed nature of this movie with flat audio, crippled dialogue, and CGI where Leia only really had one facial expression for 90% of her appearances. It really wasn’t worth it. I know Star Wars doesn’t do flashbacks (which, frankly, I appreciate a lot), but I think they could have utilized the IDEA of Leia better than her actual self. Leia was forced, it showed, and it wasn’t good. Honestly they did a WAY better job reviving Tarkin in RO.

+An incredibly unnecessary amount of new information for the third act of a series was introduced in this film, starting with Leia suddenly being a well-trained Jedi or something. At least enough to ‘train’ Rey, which…frankly wasn’t believable. Leia having the force was a given. That she distanced herself from active application of the Force as a residual reaction to the bombshell of Darth Vader being her father is what is, and always has, made sense. THAT is a nuanced perspective, but it gets thrown out in favor of not just shoe-horning Leia in to the movie, but also because they had no idea what else to do with her at all in this film. This is also why Leia shouldn’t have been in this movie the way she was.

+Oh, you knew Palpatine was behind all this the whole time, Leia? Really? Always there, huh? When in TFA it was always snoke? Obvious dialogue lift is obvious, but the use of it was just Bad and inconsiderate to the story.

+Poe’s backstory was published on December 18th, 2015 in a book called “Before The Awakening” that details the lives of Poe, Finn, and Rey leading up to TFA. Poe is the son of two famous Rebel fighters and he grows up with a nice quiet life on Yavin 4 learning about ships and loving to fly. He goes straight from his home world to joining the Republic navy. It’s a handful of months before Leia Organa picks up on him and brings him into the Resistance. Now…this is a backstory that is JJ Abrams approved, has been out since 2015, and yet Oscar Isaac said he ‘never knew’ Poe’s backstory, and JJ somehow thinks four years later that there is space in this incredibly concise timeline for him to become a drug runner. What?? This was possibly the BIGGEST wtf moment for me in this film. What in the actual world. WHAT.

+Sidelining old characters to pointlessly introduce new ones does not serve a story, it clogs it up, drags down its rhythm, and confuses the hell out of it. As seen by Zorri and Jannah. And out of those two, only Jannah carried any kind of actual literary weight, because for Finn, he’s found more people like himself. This sort of setup is a typical play to foreshadow where Finn eventually settles down and goes at the end of the war. But this is never expounded on or explained further. It’s just, BOOM, more former troopers and a girl who is suddenly irrationally attached to him at all times.

+Rose gets replaced by Jannah, a brand new character that we only know one single thing about, and who gets to latch on to Finn out of the blue while Rose is left at home or on a ship. It was weird. It was obvious. It was incredibly awkward to watch. There was no point to Jannah clinging to Finn like this. She was reduced from a strong character to a cringy clingy one, while Finn’s love interest was completely ignored.

+The ‘Journey to The Rise of Skywalker’ comics released a couple weeks before the film heavily implied we’d get a lot of great Rose and Rey team time. We received none of it. It felt like someone had jerked a present away from us and it was a gross omission.

+It is only by the very end of the film and after multiple watches that you THINK they are trying to hint that Kylo is spiraling, thus why Leia steps in in death, but it never ever gets shown. Never once are we let in on Kylo’s state of mind. In fact, never once are we let in on *any* of these characters’ states of mind. We never really see what they are feeling or thinking or going through. Kylo is nothing but action when in TFA and TLJ we see him falling apart. This is what bad direction looks like, and it takes a Real Talent to fuck up directing an actor like Adam Driver. Another big sigh…

+There are only two cool things about this movie- The bleeding of reality between Kylo and Rey, and Palpatine’s shadow senate. When Kylo and Rey fight and the red bits go flying on the floor, it screamed serious TLJ aesthetics to me that I had to blink a moment. I think this ‘Bleed-through’ of their realities is the only TLJ hold-over we were allowed. It was a genuinely fascinating touch, which is how you know it didn’t come from *this* film’s production office.

+When you stick three people in a closet together, you expect some sort of progress in two-thirds of the potential relationships in such a cramped space. We received no such thing. Forced Trio Time resulted in no character development and seemed more like an unnecessary comic relief vehicle than anything.

+In ‘Before The Awakening’ and ‘Rey’s Survival Guide’, both publications printed under JJ Abrams’s  blessing, we learn Rey named *herself* after a helmet she found in the desert. How is it Rey’s alleged parents know her fake name? Gross, gross plot-hole.

+Four years was spent emphasizing that you don’t have to come from anywhere ‘special’ to be Important to a big story. Then they threw it out. Post-TROS interview with JJ reveals it was because they ‘couldn’t think of how else to get rey engaged in fighting palpatine’. Because he wasn’t a nasty enough dude on his own? Seriously? This is pure negligence.

+Four years was also spent emphasizing that you also don’t even NEED the force to be important to the big story and make a huge difference to the future. But let’s throw that out, too, and give Finn the force. Clearly regular people are absolutely worthless in the Star Wars Universe, according to JJ Abrams.

+Finn is only used to babysit Rey the entire time they share screen time together. The number of times he shouts her name could be turned into a drinking game. It’s one thing to care about somebody, and another thing entirely to act like you’re their high school chaperone. The whole thing was weird and awkward.

+Zorri Bliss sounds like a stripper name and she served no purpose other than to shoehorn Felicity into a star wars movie. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Babu Frik is the only true-to-star-wars critter in this whole film.

+Leia literally goes and lays down on her own funeral spread? What was that about. And that’s what that was because why would her bed be out in the open like that? That was really, really weird. And the RoTJ medal throwback was just a tacky tether to the past.

+Everyone seems so irrationally tethered to the past in this film. Kylo Ren’s spent two movies desperate to ‘leave the past behind’ and I don’t blame him at this point because it’s getting exhausting.

+As stated previously, it’s only vaguely suspected but Kylo seemed to SUPPOSED to be spiraling. Adam Driver plays Kylo like a man finally free of the voices in his head, but the plot and dialogue point to an entirely different direction saying that REALLY the monsters have allegedly doubled-down and he’s even more unhinged than before. Here is a MAJOR indication of story re-working after the film has already been shot. Adam Driver, and Daisy for that matter, is a PRECISE actor. It seems almost impossible to tell a story with him that you did not originally MEAN to tell. And it shows. JJ tried to U-Turn the story but it absolutely failed- Adam’s Kylo Ren is a calm, free man, focused, who finally knows what his purpose in life is, and that is uniting with his Dyad in the force. When really JJ tried very hard to suggest that he was spiraling so hard and so ‘lost’ in the Dark Side that it took his mother’s last breath to swing him back around. No one is going to see that narrative. The only reason why I see this shoddy attempt is because I’ve been absolutely immersed in this shit since December 2015. But the main audience? This was absolutely not conveyed.

+Seeing Dark Side Rey was nothing but a ‘cool’ moment and actually served zero function to the plot. Rey was always shown as being Grey in the force and someone who struggled to maintain balance. If that whole scene was removed, it wouldn’t change anything.

+Kylo was never in a position to kill Rey on the Death Star, and Rey taking her cheap shot to stab him while he heard his mother’s voice is an attempt to convey how much seeing her Sith self affected her than Kylo’s already very faded aggression in this film but it failed. It was weird and out of character, and even coming to that conclusion took may rewatches to come to because there is NEVER a ramp-up to Rey’s darkside taking over long enough to stab Kylo- there’s no fire, no red eyes, no teeth, none of it, to indicate she was ‘overcome’ so it just looked like bad mischaracterization. Yikes.

+Kylo and Han’s moment on the Death Star is the most moving scene of the entire film. The dialogue starts out rather familiar, and it almost seems like a cop-out, until you realize….how many times has Ben had this conversation with himself?? He doesn’t seem shocked at all that his father is there. Not at all. In fact, that Last Conversation on the bridge of Starkiller comes off as a well-rehearsed dance that Ben puts himself through regularly. And every time he hopes it’ll be affirmation enough that it’s all been worth it. But here, at the last reenactment of the worst day of his life, the script changes. He surrenders. He says dad. And he rejects Kylo Ren forever. Harrison Ford and Adam Driver are two beautifully matched, talented actors and I’d watch a movie with the two of them in it any day. God bless them.

+Hux has been wasted for the past two films. He was Terrifying in TFA and Dom gave him such significant presence that I was genuinely terrified for what he might try in the future. But instead he was lost as comic relief. When it is comically delivered that HE is the spy, every single person in my movie theatre shouted “WHAT??” in a way that was not a Good what, but in a “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me” kind of what, and I will never ever forget that. I hate seeing Star Wars diminished like this.

+Luke rehashing Obi-wan’s speech to him about how Rey MUST confront the Big Bad was an obvious rehash, and way too convenient to what Palpatine wanted. This whole appearance of Luke is very suspect, but that would be crediting them again with clever storytelling, which again this is not.

+Luke claims that Leia saw ‘the death of her son’ at the end of her Jedi Path, which one can assume why she threw it away. But then Luke says something bizarre about ‘hoping someone else would pick up her path someday’. Is that...is that not the same path leading to Ben’s death that she was avoiding in the first place? And if someone else picks it up, is that not no longer Leia’s path but that other person’s? Therefore, is not the outcome automatically going to be different and thus *avoid* Ben’s death? This was an attempt at supposedly clever foreshadowing or Mystical Talk or some shit, but all it was was dialogue that backfired in meaning spectacularly due to looping-in on itself too many times. Luke negates himself at the same time he tries to prove his point...which he then negates in the same breath. What a mess.

+All of Ben Solo’s lines were cut the last act of the film to stuff more pointless exposition at the END of film and to give more screen time to Ian McDiarmid. Ian’s great, but he’s not the main character of this series, and cutting Ben’s lines for this was Gross.  

+Space Horses? Really?? I didn’t like them in TLJ but at least there they had context- they had zero context here. The size of the horses and the ship they came off of was absurdly mismatched. Is that ship the TARDIS? That whole bit was so unnecessary and ridiculous, especially with zero setup. Which is amazing because this film is 90% set-up.

+All those ships at the end? That’s all it took? After books and comics going on about how everyone’s too terrified to help Leia because of FO scorched earth policy? Jesus it was weak, and too obvious a Deus ex Machina with THAT many ships.

+Palpatine’s Shadow Senate is cool. The idea that this guy trapped on an ugly planet stuck on Sith life-support couldn’t go two seconds without attention and praise to the point where he had to recreate the exact same senate he destroyed years ago is a concept I like. Is the Shadow Senate just in the *shape* of the old senate but filled with animated Sith proxies? Or is it actually comprised of the enslaved souls of former Senators now forced to attend the Emperor for eternity? Either way, destroying the Shadow Senate at least either set those souls free or sent them back to wherever they came from. That was actually interesting, and it’s a shame we didn’t get to learn more about such a genuinely creepy thing.

+Palpatine’s ‘we’re family’ routine drops the moment he realizes Ben and Rey are a dyad. This is suspicious, but considering the whole movie so far, it seems incorrect to giver JJ and Torrio credit for a possible mis-direct.

+Rey and Ben’s realities bleeding into each other is experienced again in swapping the light saber. This is cool. This is probably the coolest moment in the film. And then the coolness literally gets thrown into a pit when, instead of the both of them, as a Dyad, defeating Palpatine, Rey is left to carry the burden alone.

+Oh hey look a cop-out to save Rey from being bad- just have her reflect his own power back at him so it’s like he’s killing himself, wow, so original! The second Palpy revealed his gameplan about wanting to die, this became the obvious choice to both kill him and avoid giving him what he wanted. Eh….

+The Star Wars 9-movie series is the story of one man desperately begging anyone within hearing range to kill him, apparently. This is so, so old by the 9th friggin movie. 

+Ben Solo spends his entire life begging for guidance from his ancestors only to be ignored and Rey get all their attention instead. Ben Solo spends his entire life since the womb being a burden to his parents by merely existing and being manipulated by gross sith ghosts. But nah, let’s be parents to Rey and help out Rey. This is not to say she doesn’t deserve any of this, but to say there are priorities here- Rey has had a lonely life, but at least she had her sanity and was self-sufficient. Ben had neither his sanity or any control over his own life whatsoever. And to place Rey above Ben is a literal mess. The two of them were meant by the Force to rise TOGETHER, and it didn’t happen.

+Rey doesn’t disappear when she ‘dies’ after using the last of her life force to both feed Palpatine, fight him, AND defeat him. And yet while Rey has two strikes in her before kicking it, Ben, someone who is RADICALLY more trained in the force, its lore, and mechanics, only has one? This doesn’t make any sense.

+Rey has no reaction to the literal other half of her soul vanishing in front of her. Because this is a mangled JJ Abrams Finale(tm) and why should anyone, let alone his own characters, have any space to Feel? I mean, that’s not what movies are even about, right? Feeling and Telling A Story? It’s not that, right? Right?? JJ Abrams covers up Rey’s reaching-hands scar on her arm for the entire film, doesn’t address it, and apparently hates the shit out of it. I don’t know how the King of Cheese could possibly hate something like that. It was a weird and obvious omission, and frankly disappointing because the scar had come to mean something at the end of TLJ and it, like a lot in this film, got thrown in the trash.

+More forced trio time in the form of a group hug where nothing gets actually expressed because we ran out of space for dialogue 30 pages back.

+Anakin Skywalker viewed Tatooine, his place of enslavement, as the worst place in the galaxy. Luke Skywalker spent his entire youth trying to escape. Leia hated it on principle because it was where Darth Vader came from and where she herself had been enslaved in a gross gold bikini for a giant slug. Rey spent 14 years of her life dreaming of leaving the sand planet she was trapped on. But I guess that’s a fitting place to bury some memories, yeah? The place where nothing good ever, ever happened. That’s a nice spot, right?

+Rey Skywalker isn’t explained, is never led up to, and feels like a gross gimmie after four years of trying to create a Better Message that names don’t matter. HEAVY SIGH.

+Rey watches the two suns set as she is left with little more than she started- alone, on a sand planet, but this time taunted by the Twin Suns of Tatooine that the other half of her soul is literally missing and that she is now left with a gaping wound in her Force signature and her own spirit worse than if she’d just lost a Force Bonded mate.

+Ben Solo is left missing, vanished on a world that is supposedly a thin spot in the force, with no ghost, no presence, and no one to mourn him- not even by the other half of his very soul. THREE GENERATIONS of Skywalkers over NINE FILMS died to try and rescue their future embodied in the form of Ben Solo and it looks like it was for nothing. Instead, the incessant bad guy no one can move on from looks like he ultimately wins the day through an alleged granddaughter, and even that claim is on shaky ground considering the mistakes in the vision and how quickly the family conversation vanished upon the revelation that Ben and Rey are a dyad. Ben is lost, so every family member died for nothing, apparently. But hey, this is a Fun and Hopeful narrative, right?

+While the Final Order fleet is destroyed at the end, the First Order is.....still out there? It’s still out there. Nothing in that department has changed whatsoever. Leaders die. They get replaced. The cycle goes on. We spent three movies batting at a fly we didn’t even kill. Amazing.

Overall this movie is BRUTAL. Every other scene is a plot hole served to us on a silver platter, with the biggest insult being that they are plot points JJ created HIMSELF 4-6 years ago. This man literally shot himself in the face and then said it was fine as he bled out all over the film reels and it shows. If you were anyone who came along for the Additional Materials ride of the past four years, you were greeted by this film with a hard, swift, and REPEATED, backhand to the face. There was no reward here at the end of this road for fans, old and new, who actually paid attention and took an interest in the deeper lore surrounding this sequel trilogy. There was just a big fat Disney-branded middle finger as all your hard work and cash was ripped from you with a trademark villain laugh.

And that is what we’re left with.

This review does not go into detail over what we’ve discovered since the release of the film, either. That it was never finished in the editing room. That a current comic series, Rise of Kylo Ren, and what’s in the new TROS visual dictionary maddeningly contradict themselves. That allegedly SIX different endings were shot for this movie, and in the end the one they chose looks like it was *literally* reverse-engineered to confusingly kill, as JJ once called him, ‘The Other Half of Our Protagonist’. There is no time to go into detail about how Oscar Isaac just told us that noone in the cast knew that Rey Palpatine was going to be endgame except for maybe Adam when they made him do ADR declaring it with a masked face on screen (convenient). There is no room to show you the collective cast reaction they all gave to the end of the movie- none of them good, and John Boyega looking like he was holding back from punching something (he loved Kylo/Ben as much as the audience did and more). And there is no room to include what we will continue to find out as the days roll on about the tangled mess of a film that was edited and reedited, and how word on the street is a cocky director demanded Carte Blanche from Kathleen Kennedy, and I guess the story group too given the state of things, and then promptly self-destructed in the grossest, messiest end to a 40+ year series in cinema history.

There’s just no space.

But there IS a lesson.

And the lesson is this: No matter what, never stop investing in Story. Never stop caring about the details and about plot and about moving a story FORWARD. Never be afraid to move FORWARD. Look at TROS, the mess it is and the potential it had it in itself to be, and then look at the beauty that is TFA and the love that went into TLJ, and study that shit until it burns into your brain- Do not repeat those mistakes. Go out into the world and write better, shoot better, direct better, and BE BETTER. Because these producers and directors? They’re old and they’re on their way out. Just like the stable boy at the end of TLJ who secretly has the Force, know and realize that those of you out there reading this are the next generation of storytellers. YOU. And YOU, and I, and others out there like us who loved this series with our whole heart and who are watching it bleed out now on a floor that doesn’t give two shits about it, have the ability to make sure this NEVER happens again. But in order to do that….we have to pick up that pen. Pick up that pencil. Pick up that camera. Jot down that story idea and share it with likeminded friends. Go out there and CREATE, and create BETTER. Because it’s up to us now- the future of cinema is up to us. And my god, we have so much potential….

[walkingchemicalfire]

The Stray: Luca

Chapter 4

Continued from here

A/N: So I had every intention to do Whumptober this year but my September was one thing after another and I just don’t have the bandwidth to focus on an event right now. I’m just gonna let this story come about the way it wants and that’ll be that, thanks everyone for sticking around and all the new people who took the time to check this out

CW: drugged whumpee, manhandling, dehumanizing language, pain, blood, beating

The dart struck Luca in the neck. The tiniest pin prick but enough for Luca to flinch. Give him a break, he thought he was getting shot for real. He reached up and plucked it out with a wince. He stared at the brightly colored and fluffy tip on the opposite end from the needle point.

“Huh, my worst nightmare shot me with a hot pink dart.” Luca chuckled. “Who the hell comes up with this bullshit?” He meant to say in a joking manner, but what came out was just a stream of random letters and a groan as the ceiling became the floor.

“Gah dahmm ith, wha t’fu—,” He tried again and reached out for the wall, stumbling to the ground when the wall turned to liquid and his hand went right through. The floor had no problem staying solid however and he landed hard on his knees. There was a zing of pain that shot through his legs, quickly becoming a dull throb to his knees. He blinked slowly and felt more of his body control slipping away. The fall the rest of the way to the floor was less than graceful and should have been more painful, but Luca was much too focused on how his head felt like it had a bowl of water encased around it.

“Stupid animal should count itself lucky we ain’t killed it already.” The deep voice of freaky Sasquatch man floated through on an air bubble in the ocean surrounding Luca. He knew he had a snappy retort on file somewhere in his mind, but that box was like buried treasure locked on some island far away. He could feel his tongue flopping around in his mouth, it felt like he was a fish on dry land but with just enough water to keep breathing for a little while longer.

Something pushed him on to his side. The wall remained solid this time when his back leaned against it. Sasquatch looked down at Luca as he jammed his boot into his ribs. Luca felt a breathy groan escape him, trying to push away from the prodding. He can’t seem to find his limbs though. The only sense he has any dominion over is sight and even that is compromised when the giant human crouches in front of him and pulls his eyelid back, but not without first jamming his finger into the delicate skin with more force than necessary. Luca can hear his own scream in his head but it doesn’t make it past his lips.

“What level tranq was that, P?” He asked as he peered into Luca’s blown pupils.

“Um, the mild one?” Peter replied from out of Luca’s eye-line.

The meaty finger retracts and Luca could cry in relief, in fact he’s fairly certain he already was, given that his vision has now joined his other senses under water.

“You tellin’ me you came in here with just a mild tranq dart and your shit aim? Ha, you got more balls than I thought!”

The comment goes unanswered by Peter and Luca strains to move his head from the ground. He must do something because Sasquatch grabs a fistful of Luca’s hair, yanking his head back where it thumps against the stone wall. “Stop your whining, mutt, or I’ll give you something to whine about.”

The quick tug makes Luca gasp and attempt to struggle out of the grip. He’s marginally successful since Sasquatch releases him, but Luca doesn’t count it as a win in his favor when his head is then dropped to the stone floor with a thud. It pops the bubble of water around his head though and he can focus on more than just the disconnect from his own body.

Sasquatch had moved away from Luca to inspect the manacles that previously held the werewolf and he subsequently ripped apart. The massive human gives a low whistle as he gets a closer look at the one cuff that is stretched out into a oval shape. “Guess the silver ran out too quick.”

“What does that mean?” Peter’s softer voice asked as his smaller frame shuffled toward the larger man, while keeping a wary eye on Luca.

“Means the beast is still too connected to its wolf. It shouldn’t be able to bend the metal like this,” Sasquatch fiddled with the silver rod “especially when it had to go through more silver to get out.”

Luca blinked away the false tears, beginning to feel the return of control over his limbs. He started small, wiggling fingers and toes, gradually bending his arms and legs after he watched Peter divert his attention to the manacles. Nothing felt broken from the fall, but he certainly was starting to feel sore from the initial tumble and the uncomfortable position Sasquatch had pushed him into against the wall.

Luca swam through the pain to reach out to his wolf, he couldn’t give up this chance of escape, he had to Change now before he was locked up again. He strained into a Change, so accustomed to it being as natural as breathing, it came as a shock when he could feel it happening inside him. He bit his lip to hold back the cry of agony as his skin began to grow hot and his bones ached. He had never had to think about how to Change before. Had this pain been present all those times? No. That couldn’t be possible. Luca knew he was strong but he also knew there was no way he could just block out this level of discomfort. It felt like his wolf was chained up and out of his reach, but he could feel him. He was attacking the chains that bound him, just as his human was fighting the newfound agony of the Change to reach him too.

Luca groaned as the pain spiked, the Change beginning to alter his physical form now. There was no way he was going to make it through this without passing out first. He wanted to stop. He wanted to rest. He wanted to be home with his Pack, safe.

My Pack. This is for my Pack.

The thought of his family waiting for him, having total faith in him to lead the humans away, trusting him with their safety. The sense of protection swept through him like a tsunami. Luca felt a rush of adrenaline, flowing through him and towards his wolf, urging him up to his hands and knees as his wolf snapped the chain and prepared to make the leap toward his human.

“FUCKING HELL!!” A loud shout boomed in the cell, just as something slammed down on Luca’s back. It hit him hard and forced him back down. At least he had enough wits about him to not smack his face on the stone this time. He turned his head to see Sasquatch had used his boot to hold him in place. He struggled and snapped his elongated teeth toward the man. It was enough to knock him off balance but the human didn’t fall. Luca growled, having just enough time to scramble to his knees before Sasquatch punched him squarely in the face. The pain smacked into him hard, his wolf howled as he continued to try and reach his human enough to fully Change.

“Not gonna happen, you mangey mutt!” The man grabbed him by his hair again, holding him up just to punch him in the gut. Luca gasped, pain in his face, and now his abdomen, disoriented him. He could feel himself slipping away from the Change, the wolf traits already retracting. His wolf wanted to protect him but he couldn’t focus up enough now to make it through that new pain of Changing.

The punches continued to rain down on him, alternating between his torso and his head, the later causing everything to spin out of control before beginning to have black spots appear. He could feel his body slumping more and more as the beating went on, waiting for the inevitable moment when he would fall unconscious. Luca smiled inwardly, recalling the last time he had been beaten unconscious and his wolf had come out to play. It was a small hope that it would happen like that this time, but Luca clung to it anyway.

“Nice knowing you, fuckers.” Luca thought and mentally flipped the bird.

“That is quite enough, Julian.” The familiar voice of Leader calmly said. The assault stopped and Luca squints through his watery vision. Sasquatch kept him upright by the hand in his hair as Leader stands beside him with their hands clasped behind their back. They smirk down at him for a while but say nothing. Luca glares as best he can. No chance in hell is he going down without a fight. If this is where it ends, he will face it head on.

Leader nods firmly once as they make up their mind. “Take it to the post for now, Julian. It’s time for it to be broken in.”

Tag Team: @whump-tr0pes @sableflynn @whumpywhumper @0idril0 @cursedscribbles @mymoon199 @endless-whump @insanitywishes @liliability @whatwhumpcomments

[thoschei-rights]

A collection of Who fic ideas I cant be motivated to write

SEASON 12 FINALE SPOILERS INCLUDED.

some of these are really shit half-ideas and some are just so bad, im sorry but i need someone to write these bc i suck at writing- ilysm

1. So Clara can’t get back to Trap Street because Gallifrey is gone and I doubt its coming back this time, because they don’t deserve it- but imagine if Clara unknowingly arrived on Gallifrey, saw the destruction and then saw a small gaggle of humans making their way towards the broken citadel and she’s like oya oya I smell a conspiracy- and thus we get Clara there, and are you telling me when she finds out the truth, she isn’t going to smack The Master round the face because he’s the only Time Lord left in the Universe and she needs to get her anger out at them somehow- idk where it goes from here but I think about Thirteen and Clara a lot.

2. The Master is that child on the cliff with the Timeless Child, I’ve seen this idea around and I love it but I have no idea how I’d really write it, I just love the idea and want more people to write this thanks??

3. Angsty plot but imagine if Yaz, Graham and the other two humans got into the Cybersuits and couldn’t get back out? Like the suit took them? Thought oh hey new flesh yum good stuff?? And woops Graham you doylum you accidentally converted the four of yall into Cybermen while thinking yall clever. 

4. Someone needs to write Thirteen finding out where she’s from though, and hopefully she finds out her original race aren’t all assholes and she has somewhere she actually belongs. Make it Madagascar 2 style like at first she feels like the odd one out, doesn’t fit in, does something wrong and feels outcasted, scared to be alone again but bOOM she isn’’t and someone is there for her, heck even give her parents or smth, i just want her to belong, to have a family she knows wont leave her after only a few years like all the companions do, someone of her own species who dont age in the blink of an eye like humans- :’) am i trying to redeem myself for all the torture i put thirteen through

5. The prison is Stormcage and River hears about the fact they have a new maximum security prisoner and they are really rare bc sure the universe has lots of psychos but only the worst of the worst land themselves in the block the doctor is in and she’s like hmm I wonder- and boom prison break happens as soon as River finds out who it is and whats just happened to her :’)

6. Dhawan!Master barely escaping Gallifrey with The Doctor, the two forces to escape in the same Tardis since its the only one in range, but he’s been hit ever so slightly by the death particle, enough that his body is forced to regenerate and he becomes Missy and Thirteen is just on shock because OH it all makes sense now- Missy didn’t revert to her old ways, she’d not BEEN Missy yet, and finally there’s some hope in the Dark for Thirteen. Also Thrissy because I’m gay for Thrissy.

7. That 12.9 ending scene but instead of just standing in shock and fear and anger, the Doctor paces over to the smug bitch who just yeeted out of that boundary, slaps him across the face and then snogs the fuck outta him. Thoschei rights. Preach. 

8. When The Doctor blows the Matrix, her wiped memories start coming back to her and while in prison she has to experience some of these returning terrors alone, with no comfort. Lots of angst. Make it really dark and sad. Make me sob my heart out. 

9. The Matrix takes more energy from Thirteen than she thought and when yanking from Yaz’s hold to go blow up the Master and the Cybermasters, she collapses from exhaustion and is unconscious while Yaz takes her place and sacrifices herself. When Thirteen wakes, its too late and she has to live in a Universe with no Yaz, just even more shit for her to try and process, its all too much. 

10. Somehow rumour of the true creation of the time lords gets out among the stars, it suddenly becomes common knowledge, “did you hear about the doctor?” “the time lords experimented on her, as a child, stole her dna for themselves” and “they wiped her memories, forced her to revert to a child” and maybe even “i heard they trapped her in a confession dial for 4.5 billion years-” “wha- 4.5 BILLION years?” and suddenly everyone knows the time lords dirty secret but they also know the fragments of the doctors past, and eventually these rumours reach people who know her well, her friends whom are still among the stars, Bill, Clara and Me, Jack, River, hell anyone you wanted, and these companions are like shit we need to find the doctor?? maybe some of them break her outta prison or?? maybe some stumble upon her after shes reunited with the fam and the fam end up finding out too, after thirteen tries not to let them know too much?? idk?? this one is very ambiguous on details so go with it as you want

11. any form of feral baby thirteen. just anything where she snaps at any point will make me happy. just give me. give. me.

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Waking Up in Vegas-Ch. 40

Chapter 40: … What I Know Now

Mera, Afternoon, 3:31 PM

           My chest ached in a way that I’d never felt before. Part of it was the pneumonia and infection that clogged my lungs with fluid. But part of it was from the sudden desperate terror that flooded through me. I knew that if Dean walked in with Seth here it wouldn’t end well. They wouldn’t handle this like adults. Dean would put Seth into the hospital, and Seth would get Dean arrested.

           “Please…” I gasped, clawing at the sheets to keep from reaching for the nurse call button. “Just… g—go…”

           Seth watched me with those deep chocolate eyes of his that reminded me of the days when he was just Colby. When things had been simpler. When I could believe that he would always be my friend—my best friend—and that we would be together like we planned.

           Those days were over. They had been for longer than I could count. I choked—on fear, on pain, on the sheer lack of oxygen forcing its way into my body. The world went fuzzy around the edges.

           “Bear?” he asked, his voice breaking on the word. I gasped, desperate for a solid breath. It was even harder to breathe as I tried to fight back the tears that threatened to choke me. I squeezed my eyes shut, coughing hard.

           Seth held the pail beneath my chin as I coughed and hacked, spitting up phlegm and vomit. He didn’t flinch. He just waited, pushing my hair back out of the way.

Seth, Afternoon, 3:32 PM

            I’d forgotten how bad it could be. She struggled to breathe. She was pale—all except that rash over her nose and cheeks—and clammy. For a split second, I had a sudden flash of terror. I couldn’t remember it ever being like this.

           If I lost her…

           She’s not mine to lose. The words spiked into my brain and ripped into my chest. I lost her a long time ago.

           “Mera,” I said, my voice somehow faint and stricken. My eyes burned. I knew I was crying. I could feel the tears as they ran down my face and into my beard.

           And honestly, I couldn’t find the real reason for the tears. I didn’t know if it was because she sat in a hospital bed desperate to breathe or if it was because she was so far gone from me that there was no going back.

           All I knew was that, in that moment, it felt like my heart had been ripped out from between my ribs.

           “Colby…” Her voice, so scared, stabbed me in the gut. That word… that name. She hadn’t called me that for years. Her fingers pulled along the blanket, reaching for my hand. I pressed my hand against hers.

           She blinked, tears building on her lashes. A monitor by her side started to beep loudly.

           I squeezed her fingers with mine.

           “Relax, Bear,” I said softly. “I’m going to leave before Dean comes back. Just relax and get better.”

           I turned my hat backwards and leaned over the rail, pressing a lingering kiss to her forehead. “Please.”

Dean, Afternoon, 4:18 PM

           The nurses had changed since I’d left. But the one at the desk was one I’d gotten to know in the last few days.

           “Everything okay, Cheri?” I asked, leaning against the counter that ran around the nurse’s station.

           She was an older woman who had a kind smile. I felt better knowing she was taking care of Mera. “She had a rough patch while you were out. We had to give her something to calm her.”

           Shit. “What happened?”

           Cheri reached out and patted my hand. “Got a little emotional and had some breathing issues. Probably happened when her brother visited.”

           “Brother?” I repeated, feeling stupid and slow. That thing in my chest roared angrily. “Dark hair, beard?”

           “That’s the one. Crying when he left, poor thing.”

           I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. How the fuck had he found out where she was? The only person who knew she was here was Roman.

           “Shit,” I swore under my breath. I scrubbed a hand over my hair and down my face. Cheri looked startled, but I forced a smile and walked a few steps down the hall. I dug my phone out of my pocket and dialed Roman’s number.

           He picked up on the third ring, but didn’t get a chance to say anything.

           “What the fuck, uce?” I snarled, my forehead against the wall. “Did you tell Rollins where she was?”

           Roman growled at me. Under normal circumstances, I’d realize that it was his don’t screw with me growl. But just then, I didn’t give a shit. I was livid and absolutely desperate to get my hands on Seth Rollins and rip his head off.

           “I didn’t. And you know I never would,” he snapped. “Get your head out of your ass, Ambrose.”

           “Then how did he find her? Because he was here.”

           The other end of the line went quiet for way too long. Just when I was ready to hang up, Roman spoke up again. “I get that you’re pissed off, and Seth was a dick to her, but you’ve got to get a grip on yourself. It’s time for you to let the leash out a little.”

           I knocked on the wall with my fist. God knew I wanted to put my fist through the drywall. I wanted to rip the entire world down to keep her safe. To keep her from feeling one instant of pain or fear or harm.

           But I couldn’t. Not when her entire body was fighting against me.

           “She’s…”

           “Strong as hell. And smart. That’s why you fell in love with Mera in the first place,” Roman replied smoothly. “Let her be who she is… And just take care of her.”

           He hung up and I slipped into Mera’s room. The head of her bed had been lifted up. Her honey hair had been braided over her shoulder. She looked peaceful for the first time since she’d gotten sick. The monitors were quiet. For the moment, she was okay.

           That was all I could hope for.

Mera, Afternoon, 4:21 PM

           I didn’t know where I was, but I knew for certain that I was dreaming. My head felt heavy, fuzzy. It was disorienting.

           I glanced around, finally recognizing the room around me. I knew the walls—cinderblock painted black and graffitied with band logos, song lyrics, and a swirling vortex that had Portal to RVD spray painted in orange above it—as well as I knew my own mind.

           There was a faint light filtering down the stairs into the basement bedroom. I could see his clothes hanging on the pipe beneath the steps. His worn through paperbacks were piled in the corner next to a boom box and a stack of CDs. Nintendo on a shelf under the television next to a row of games. Digital clock on the bedside table, and the mattress and box spring on the floor against the wall. Colby sat on the end of the bed, grinning at me.

           I’d forgotten the goatee and seventies hair he’d had in high school. His hair was tied back, sweat still clear on his face and along his throat. He was flushed, with his big doe eyes on me.

           “Hey, Bee,” I said, crossing the room just as I’d done a thousand times before. Colby reached out and tugged me down into his lap. He wrapped his arms around me and pressed a kiss against my throat. “How was class?”

           He brushed my hair back behind my ears and tipped his head up to look at me. “I’m exhausted. And I stink, Bear.”

           I wrinkled my nose and nodded before leaning down to press my lips against his. He kissed me like I was precious. Like I was perfect and the center of his world.

           “You need a shower,” I said playfully.

           Colby laughed and raised his brows. “Want to join me?” He gestured toward the bathroom.

           I blushed and looked away. He kissed the tip of my nose and sat me on the mattress beside him. “I won’t be long,” he said as he stood up. “And then you can tell me everything about U of Iowa.”

           He disappeared into the bathroom, the grin on his face the one I’d known my entire childhood.

           The one that would always make me feel butterflies in my stomach and like I was the center of the universe. He would always be my Colby. My best friend. And the person I wanted to see everything with when we were grown-ups.

           The one I would love for the rest of my life.

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