#i found out about the strike only recently [my social media is living under a rock] so the fact my queue went into it i was like GAH NO

[finartin]

Gift art done for Bepotelkh's 2023 Yule Exchange, featuring Thy's sonoelkh Nue! :D I was SO insanely lucky I managed to finish and upload this just before my PC's battery totally kicked the bucket man I was sweatin;;;

Let me also take this opportunity to advertise yet another event of theirs- the Month of the Aiti, where this year they're giving away one free Aitielkh fawn MYO ticket each to all members!! ☆o☆

Join in the fun here before this month is up [if you want to of course I mean no pressure]:

[purplecritter]

theories/thoughts/analysis about touchstarved after playing the demo a few times

Under the cut because it got long (I exceeded the post character limit...) Also spoilers btw. PS: All the links are to posts on the official social media accounts or their kickstarter, with the exception of the animated trailer screenshots that I got from here.

(Happy one month since demo dropped!)

Mhin

I'm starting with them because I play favorites.

Mhin's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the crying eye (guilt? pain? blood? Their pupils almost seem to glow red, I wonder if it's connected) and the beak (in a way that reminds me of the skull of a bird rather than a live one).

The red choice connected to them is about asking if they're a scientist: their precision is almost surgical, though when asked if they've studied anatomy or medicine their reply is “Not quite” so it must be something similar enough.

When Vere complains about their first encounter with Mhin, he mentions that their dagger (visible in their in-game art) is an antique. Perhaps they inherited it, maybe from a mentor? It’s a curious choice of weapon for a hunter: stilettos (it’s described as such in the demo) aren’t ineffective in battle (especially if wielded by a physically strong fighter, which they absolutely are), but they are favored by assassins because they’re easy to conceal, they strike precisely and deeply but without letting much blood leak from the needle-thin wound.

As far as design goes, the clasps on their hood looks like a mix between the quaternary celtic knot and the triquetra / trinity knot. Symbolically, the latter is associated to the Triple Goddess (more on this in Leander’s section) or three elements, while the former represents the four elements or the four seasons or the four cardinal directions, and is often used as a symbol of protection.

Their fatal flaw is that they “resist change at all costs”. I'm led to believe that they became a Monster instead of being born one. I think it either happened not that long ago or they lost control over it recently, and that's what spurred them on their search for a cure. Them being described as “outcast” also makes me think that they could have been exiled from wherever they came from, perhaps because the people found out that “a monster hides within their frame”.

When questioning them about Ais, they say “I'm not going to risk my life in the hopes that any of them is different” which shows that they’re distancing themself from their situation (i.e., being/becoming a Monster).

Their hate towards Monsters could be either a projection of the hate they feel towards themself (if they were aware that there was a Monster inside of them before they lost control and hurt someone, for example) or just because one took over them and by extension they hate every Monster because of it. If the “lost control and hurt someone” thing is true I'll also add that they might be working as a Hunter as a way to try and atone. It could also be a way to expel the more violent instincts (I’m assuming they have some) into something productive.

The “they're afraid of being hurt. Or worse” on their relationship chart with Kuras feels to me like they're afraid of hurting him, also because when you ask them how they get along with him during the demo, they say “Few people are willing to help others; fewer when there's any risk involved” and I'm choosing to interpret that they think of themself as the risk. I know I'm really pushing it on this aspect but the “If you stay too close to me, you'll get hurt”+“Find someone safer to ask for help” only fuels me more. Their monstrous form also looks less defined and more liquid compared to the others, maybe because it's not as developed so it doesn't look as solid?

Vere is also said to be often provoking Mhin in order to make them lose control: he's confident in himself enough to think that he'd have the upper hand in a fight with Monster!Mhin, probably because they're a skilled hunter but they don't have that much experience over their monstrous side. Mhin dislikes Vere because he’s “the embodiment of everything [they] hate about Monsters”: while Mhin holds back from their nature and seeks a cure, Vere wants to give in to his instincts without restraints.

In the demo, they get defensive when questioned about the Senobium, but when they say “Whatever you're looking for, the cost may be higher than what you're willing to pay” I think they're speaking from experience.

It's interesting that it's implied that they slept with Leander once. Judging by the comment about the Wet Wick being the “perfect combination for making mistakes”, they're not enthusiastic about it. I’m guessing that they don't like that Leander has seen them with their guard down? Or they

Unless I missed something, it's unknown where in Eridia they're staying. I'll say it's probably in a different direction from the Wet Wick since they make a point of saying that they're only going there to protect Kuras (instead of, for example, “I live nearby anyways so I'll take the same road”).

The flowers in their pin design look similar to cornus kousa, or some other type of dogwood, symbolizing hope, resilience, renewal (I also found: rebirth, new life, strength, regret). After a long and grueling winter, Eridia greets the first dogwood blossoms with relief. These flowers are known to cling tenaciously to life even in the worst conditions, from barren wastelands to ruins perpetually shrouded in Fogfall… Really poetic meaning! I imagine Mhin as the dogwood flower, persisting even after the Tragic Backstory that made them lonely (“barren wastelands”) and their Monster Form (“shrouded in fogfall”)

Leander

Leander's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights only his eyes (they share the color of his magic -> maybe it's how he uses magic that contributes to him being “monstrous”?).

Nothing to note about his red choice except that it is unlocked by generally following his lead (taking the flower when he offers it, touching him without hesitation).

Speaking of his magic, an Alchemist MC notes that it extraordinarily powerful, enough that he doesn't need incantations or spell circles to cast it. Kuras mentioned that Leander prefers the company of those similar to him and that the Bloodhounds are mostly people who've endured the hardships of Lowtown, so I can't help but wonder if Leander was always a natural at magic, or if he did receive training but was later cast out, or maybe he left by choice?

A recurrent symbol in Leander's design is the triangle, as a detail mostly (on his coat, boots, dangling from his belt), but there's also one that looks like the alchemical symbol for earth (🜃) attached to the brooch on his chest; another symbol for earth is, you guessed it, the serpent, whose other meaning is duplicitous nature as well as renewal and rebirth. This connects to the ouroboros (present in his earring as well as in the background of the sticker and charm kickstarter rewards), symbolizing the cycle of death and rebirth and with relevance in alchemy as the “all in one”. The same theme is also present in the symbol of the triple moon (on his belt) symbolizing the stages of birth life and death and more in general three aspects united in one; the white lilies symbolizing renewal, regrowth, rebirth. The green feels fitting too, since it's often used to symbolize health and abundance.

Alongside the little triangle shape, attached to his belt there are a key (which is not the room key he gave MC), the head of which reminds me of two snakes knotted together; there's also a... I have no clue what that glowing red globe-spike is actually. It's the only other red item (along with the gem on the earring sword hilt) on Leander, but in some of the concept art it was green instead, so I think it's at least somewhat connected to his magic or the source of it. The shape of it combined with the red glow reminds me of Eridia’s towers’ architecture but that’s probably a stretch. I also feel like the symbol on the central part of the triple moon belt buckle is relevant: it immediately reminded me of a spell circle, and after doing some digging in sacred geometry, I’ve found that its 6 petal-like shapes (lilies also have 6 petals...) look similar to the hexafoil, “germ of life”, or the central part of the “seed of life”, which is connected to the divine creation of the world in 7 days/phases; a series of interconnected hexafoils make the “flower of life”, the meaning of which is creation (both in general and of the universe itself), and that everything’s interconnected to everything else... I couldn’t help but think of the “As above, so below” tagline in the Bloodhounds' poster; the sentence has so many interpretations in alchemy/esotericism but the gist of it is, “things in the higher realms of existence are just like in the lower/earthly plane” and “what happens in a large scale also happens in a small scale” and “common material things can make pure spiritual things”.

Overall, I'm thinking that all the green-glowing details on his outfit might be arcane foci, to help him cast magic without using incantations. As of right now, I’m willing to bet that Leander's connected to the Allmother (the traveler in the cart prayed to her) and/or the Abbess (the leader of the Senobium, I think): many of the aforementioned symbols also have ties to femininity and/or feminine qualities.

Other big things in his design are the eyebags and scar that goes from the cheek to the arm. I don’t have much to say on those, probably the scar is going to be connected to some important backstory event and the eyebags are a clue to suggest that there’s something troubling behind the bright and positive persona that he presents as.

If we want to take the name literally (I do), we could assume that Leander and his Bloodhounds are not simply a group of mercenaries, but mercenaries with a cause. Hounds are a breed specifically intended to track something specific (or someone specific) by scent. Given the animosity shown by them at the mere mention of the Senobium, it could have something to do with that, but perhaps it's also something more personal to Leander.

Let's get to the biggest red flag of the green-themed man: “Fatal flaw: [REDACTED]” and “Not all Monsters are inhuman”. There's also the fact that Vere doesn't trust his behaviour (I'll get to it in his section but I would generally trust Vere's words to be truthful). It’s also worth noting that in the first scene he makes an appearance in, he’s presented almost as a performer, a subtle-not-so-subtle hint that he can work his audience really skillfully. Overall, he seems too good to be true, and to quote Leander himself in the demo, “Things that seem too good to be true are often just that.” I don't think he's malevolent per se, but I also believe he's a very good liar (or at least, good at keeping his cards close to his pillowy bosom chest) and he can be a lot more ruthless than he lets on.

I already said it in Mhin's section but it's implied that the two of them slept together once, and I can't help but wonder if Leander also tried the whole "let me touch you so I can see what curses you but also you can tie me down if you want wink wink" tactic with them.

I get the feeling that he also slept with Ais? “He sure likes it when others take control”+“He's not so bad once you get to know him”. The bartender didn't joke about the room being used often huh (i’m saying this lighthearted and teasingly, nothing against it lol).

He's obviously staying at the Wet Wick with the rest of the Bloodhounds, and it happens often enough that the bartender/owner is familiar with their habits. I wonder if he also as a house of his own or not.

The flowers (in-game art, animated trailer, pin design, charm and sticker design) are white lilies, symbolizing devotion, sympathy and faith (I also found: renewal/rebirth/reregrowth and purity. Nothing says “I love you” as clearly as white lilies—ironic, since they’re some of the region’s most poisonous flowers. Some mages believe that these lilies contain a mysterious magic, but attempts to harness this power have only resulted in lethal poisonings. A not-so-veiled warning to be careful of what lies behind Leander’s charming facade... And considering that he seems to like when MC defers to him, I could imagine the (metaphorical... unless?) lethal poisoning in a possible bad end!

Kuras

Kuras' silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the several eyes (truth and secrets being very important themes in his route, he's also described as “observer”) and his tears (his guilt).

No red choice for Kuras, but there is various flavour text depending on choices. First and most notably, the Unnamed MC notes that something about him feels familiar: this could simply be a hint about him being divine in nature, or it might mean something more, I'm still uncertain. Moreover, depending on dialogue, one of his scenes towards the end of the demo plays out slightly differently, and it shows the more playful side of him (which I absolutely didn’t expect, but I enjoyed that).

As far as appearance goes, his human form and his divine form have many similarities: this post does a very good job of showing them, but additionally I'll say that his halo (silhouette, charm and sticker design) reminds me of the shape of his earrings.

There are a few lines that imply that being in Kuras' vicinity feels physically warmer. It could be just a standard “MC likes him so being near makes them feel all warm and fuzzy” but I think it's more to do with his angelic nature having a comforting effect on people. Something that could be connected to that is the theme of fire (“eldritch flames”, also visible in the charm and sticker design), which symbolically is the element that purifies souls and reveals the truth.

His clinic seems very neat, for someone who works with numerous patients for the whole day. Moreover, his clothes stay unnaturally devoid of any sign of dirt. His appearance is also very curated, so I think that part of it is him being thorough about cleaning and part of it might be a consequence of his magic. Additionally, during the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 49:32), they (jokingly) said that Kuras doesn’t even put his hair up while performing surgeries, which to me also means that he doesn’t need to do it because he’s supernaturally clean and hygienic.

There's no clear mention of him having magic in the first place, but I don't think he could've completely reattached MC's arm so flawlessly any other way.

I wouldn't think much of it if it were any other character but Kuras' birthday being January 1st makes me think that he picked the date on purpose... or randomly, considering it doesn’t seem to be important to him.

During the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 41:24), it was noted that Kuras’ name was deliberately chosen, I think implying that it probably has a meaning behind it, though I can’t say what as of now (my search only revealed that kurash is a type of wrestling in Central Asia, and that there’s a deity called Kura in a region of Syria).

I think it's a known fact in Eridia that Kuras is not simply human (“Only the most desperate or the foolish would dare lay a hand on me”), so it's interesting that he chose to not disclose that to the MC. Granted, they've interacted for less than a day now and information is the currency. I also wonder if he’s always been a doctor or if he chose to become one at a certain point... I guess it would depend: is he “repentant” for something he did before settling in Eridia, or after?

Ais also thinks that Kuras used to be more outgoing but the reason he doesn’t really open up a lot to people anymore is because he “must’ve been burned”, which is an interesting insight. I lean more towards thinking that he’s been burned after becoming a resident in Eridia.

There's nothing that strikes me as peculiar regarding his relationships with the other characters,with two exceptions. Kuras' self-inflicted exile is centuries old, and combined with the fact that he (occasionally and begrudgingly?) works with the Senobium, it might be plenty of reason for Vere to hate him. I think that Kuras might've witnessed how he came to be captured (or actively took part in it), and that event is what feeds his mistrust towards Vere. Secondly, it’s said that he “looks forward to Ais helping around his clinic”: does Ais use the Seaspring’s healing powers on some patients (“I help him in the clinic sometimes”)? I wonder if the smokey scent when the MC wakes in Kuras’ clinic was because he’d been there recently.

He lives in one of the more populated areas, probably because 1) more easy for patients to reach him and 2) he likes meeting people.

The flowers in his pin design look like magnolias, symbolizing longevity, grace, divinity (I also found: eternity, perseverance, purity). The elegant magnolia’s therapeutic properties are vital in such a dangerous world. The Senobium cultivates a small magnolia grove, though few make it past the imposing gates to enjoy the rejuvenating blossoms… Of course the medicinal aspect reflects Kuras well. And there’s the connection to him being employed in some form by the Senobium too, the gates could definitely be a metaphor for how he keeps the true extent of his powers at bay

Ais

Ais' silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights his tattoo (Ocudeus' tentacles) and his eyes (the Groupmind's effect).

If MC’s been talking defiantly to him throughout the demo, the red choice connected to Ais also consists of rebelling to him, which he clearly enjoys (he’s said to dislike easy fights, so that’s probably it).

An Unnamed MC will note that Ocudeus’s presence/calling in the Seaspring feels familiar, and that his tattoo feels unnatural and it seems to move when they’re not looking... I’ll say that the tattoo isn’t a regular one, and might be the physical manifestation of the metaphorical mark that the bond with Ocudeus left on Ais. This also explains why in the silhouette of his monstrous form the tentacle tattoo is extended beyond what it normally looks like (it reaches his face, and over half of his chest).

The very prominent eye theme (charm and sticker design, Ocudeus possibly meaning “eye god” if it’s latin) and feeling of being watched (+“Got eyes in the back of my head”), plus the fact that the red-eyed woman knew what MC was seeking as well as their name, makes me believe that Ocudeus' area of influence is very extensive. As a consequence of the Groupmind, it's likely that apart from sharing thoughts (and identity?) those connected also share what they see to Ocudeus/Ais.

The notes left on the pillars are interesting. The topmost and middle one I feel are more useful to the player and serve as casual worldbuilding, but the bottommost one is the most curious imo: decoding the scrawling results in “never wish on a shooting star he's always listening”. Initially I thought that the “he” referred to Ocudeus, but it doesn't feel correct (Ocudeus always watches, it doesn't listen).

During the 16/04/23 Q&A stream with the devs (timestamp: 36:32), Ais was said to be the first character that they created, and the rest of the cast was built around him for cohesiveness. This is interesting to me, as from the demo I thought that “central” role would fit Leander more.

Speaking of Leander, both of them have a like/dislike relationship with each other (Leander because “the assassination attempts are funny, until they’re not” and Ais because he “won’t hesitate to put Leander in his place when the time comes”). Leander seems to be uncomfortable about the effects that the Seaspring has on people, while Ais talks about “a time where Leander's resolve will be tested, same for anyone in this plane or the next”... I wonder how soon that time is going to be 👀. I already noted this in Leander’s section but I think they also slept together at one point or another.

Same topic, different character: Vere. It’s cute that they’re so fond of each other [1, 2], and I’m very curious to know how they met. They probably bonded because of compatible personalities, but I also think that they like each other because they’re both dangerous, and being with someone who is also as dangerous feels... Fitting, safe, maybe?

The fact that he's “not as in control of his powers as he thought” is also interesting to me, since his nonchalance doesn't seem to be because he's lazy but because he's extremely confident. Perhaps he got too sure of himself and lost sight of the risks?

Ais is described as “renegade”, which by definition is someone who betrays a principle/alliance. I have no doubt that this is connected to the reason why he's a “gang leader without the gang members”, and probably to how he came to bond with Ocudeus. Because he's also said to dislike isolation, I lean more towards saying that he didn't willingly let his (former?) members go, my theory is either they left on their own (perhaps they were scared of Ocudeus, or they didn't approve of it) or he accidentally disposed of them (either because he wasn't in control of Ocudeus / the Soulless, or because Ocudeus felt hungry and they were conveniently nearby). Either way, it must have hurt him, since he's not at all willing to talk about it beyond “Gang took a walk”.

I’m very curious about Mhin saying “Monsters like [Ais] don't know or care about what they have”... What does (did?) Ais have? Could it be in reference to him letting his former gang/companions go away in favor of siding with Ocudeus and/or the Seaspring?

He lives at the Seaspring, though I wonder if he sleeps in a pile near those cushions, cuddling the Soulless, or if he has more personal quarters further in. There's a cave entrance visible on the other side of the bloody water, but that feels more for Ocudeus rather than Ais himself.

The flowers in his pin design are spider lilies, symbolizing mourning, goodbyes, lost memories (I also found: death, abandonment, new beginnings). Eerily beautiful, red spider lilies bear the sorrow of loss and farewells. Eridians believe these flowers shepherd lost spirits into the afterlife. The city has seen a sudden increase in these unearthly flowers, leaving many puzzled about their meaning… Very fitting with Ocudeus’ domain of losing memories and thus, beginning a new life! I’m not sure if we should be taking the increase in flowers literally, or just metaphorically as there’s many in the Groupmind

Vere

Vere's silhouette [1, 2] in the animated trailer [screenshot] highlights the eyes again (“windows to the soul” and all that), his fangs (him being the most openly aggressive) and the collar and chains (the thing that binds him to the Senobium's will).

I haven’t been able to not get his red choice [edit: “hidden ending”, not a red choice], but from my understanding of what others have said it’s based on how you talk to him and not on your actions. I’d love to say more but since I don’t know exactly influences it, I don’t have much to talk about regarding that🥹

“Not quite human, not quite monster. Seems we’re both--” I wonder if he was about to finish the sentence with ‘cursed’?

 He has unique dialogue for each of MC’s backstories: to an Alchemist he says “The misery born of your mistreatment haunts you. I understand what it’s like to be used and thrown away. I’ll give your life new meaning”; to an Unnamed “You poor thing, misled by those you trusted most. You caused so much suffering unknowingly. I know that pain. I can help you forget it all”; to a Hound “The betrayal, the loss of hope, the sheer desperation that drives you still to search and search to no end. I could give you something new to live for”. Apart from showing that he knows stuff he’s not supposed to, I’m more interested about what he says to Alchemist and Hound: he knows the pain of causing suffering unknowingly, and he knows what it’s like to be used and then discarded. His powers seems to be seeing through people, I’d say almost mind-reading (“You can’t hide anything from me.”), but I think soul reading is a more fitting definition. I feel that all of the comments related to MC's backstory have more to do with what they experienced/felt than just objective facts, plus the way he says “All that suffering has made your soul so irresistibile...”, it makes me think that he's reading MC’S present and past emotions through their soul.

The most apparent part of his design is that he’s half showing, half hiding. His outfit makes the harness very visible, yet he hid the leash from the MC for as long as possible, and he didn't let them close enough to touch it. His pants are fully cover one side and show skin on the other. The sheer fabrics look very cool on their own but I like to think they're also part of the "half show, half hide" thing he has going on. An Alchemist MC will note that the collar seems to be enchanted, while other backstories will simply say that the lock seems easy enough to open.

In the charms and stickers design, there's his chain in the background, and it's broken. Metaphorically and literally, “breaking free from the chains” symbolizes putting an end to what holds someone captive, but also finding freedom to be oneself. Perhaps I'm reading too much into it, but I think a freed Vere would also feel free to not hide so much of himself. On that note, I'm extremely curious about what he draws on his sketchbook. Also in the charm and stickers design, as well as in the Nintendo Switch port art, is the key that he stole from the MC. It's curious that they included it instead of a more personal object like his sketchbook (present in the Switch port art but not in the stickers), but it might just be a fun nod to the demo or maybe he'll develop a habit of stealing the key again in the full game, so I don't think I should read too much into that.

Neither Vere or Kuras of them gives too many juicy details about their mutual hate towards each other during the demo, but from the additional info [1, 2] published on Tumblr, I think it might have to do with the fact that both of them have been confined in Eridia for centuries, and perhaps Kuras even contributed to the capture of Vere, too.

He’s defined as a “charlatan”, which by definition means “someone who decieves through false claims”. It fits with him saying “If I were you, I wouldn’t trust a word I say” and “Information is a luxury [...] If you valued my words you'd have taken them seriously”. This feels like a recurring theme for Vere: Ais also says, “Vere is one of the most honest people you'll meet. Just don't listen to a single thing he says”. Despite the very obvious predatory/mischievous nature of Vere, I think that he is very honest about the things he says: it’s about reading between the lines.

His very evident distaste towards Leander might be connected to this, seeing that Leander seems to be hiding a lot.

Vere clearly likes Ais, but as soon as MC asks more, he warns them about how dangerous he and the Seaspring are. I think both are true: Ais being “a good person” doesn’t exclude the fact that he is dangerous.

It could be a stretch, but I wonder if Vere lives/stays in the building that he was chained to?

The flowers in his pin design look like some type of lilies, perhaps wood lily are a type of amaryllis that symbolizes passion, allure, pride ( when researching the wood lilies, I also found: danger, determination). Local legends conflict on the origins of the amaryllis. Whether they sprang from the spilt blood of a scorned lover or were born of an ancient Senobian ritual gone awry, the truth behind these flowers is knowledge long forgotten… or held by a privileged few. Like Kuras, his flower mirrors the connection to the Senobium though it remains vague about how exactly they became involved... In the greek myth, Amaryllis consulted an oracle to win the love of the shepherd Alteo: she walked to his house every day, piercing her heart with a golden arrow, and on the 30th day flowers bloomed from her blood. Alteo became enamoured with the maiden and the flowers that bore her name... I wonder how Touchstarved’s version of the myth is different than ours, and which character Vere is more akin to?

Nothing on Sen or Elyon for now since there's too little info on both, but I'm looking forward to putting them under a microscope too 👀

(bangs pots and pans) please share your theories/thoughts if you read this far? 👉👈

[ashketchup119]

Four Years To Get There

If you or a loved one remember when I used to write regularly for hypzag/zagnos, you may be entitled to a senior citizen discount-

I didn’t want to post all of my hades stuff, but I think this one is really cute. My fanfiction writing and my original story writing are two different styles, because fanfic is my domain to go crazy go wild.

“So, four years stuck with my brother? I don’t envy you.” Thanatos commented airily as he made coffee.

Zagreus, who had woken up ten minutes prior and was staring morosely at the countertop, looked up when Than started speaking, and frowned. “Hypnos isn’t that bad, Than. He’s actually nice to be around. And he hasn’t made ‘morning person’ into a personality trait, unlike other people.” He smiled after saying this, in a teasing manner aimed in the direction of Than’s back.

Than hmph-ed and said nothing more. 

The rest of the morning passed by as usual- Than went to work, Zag went to the gym and to walk Cerberus, Than came back for an early lunch, and the two of them exchanged pleasantries at the junction between their personal schedules- Than half out the door, Zag on his way in. The two of them had been roommates for two years, and had become comfortable with this routine.

Earlier that week, though, Zag had gotten an email saying he’d been chosen to work as a bodyguard for a diplomat headed on a mission to a planet where rumors of attack had been swirling, with instructions on how to get to the port and what to bring. In total, it was meant to last about nine years- four years to get there, a year on the planet, and four years to get back. It was quite the commitment, but he didn’t mind overmuch. It’s not like there was much waiting for him on the planet he lived on currently- just his friends, who assured him they’d text and video call, and his dog, who had already been approved to come with him.

The evening before, Zag had found out the name of the diplomat he was supposed to work for. It was Hypnos! His roommate's twin brother! The two of them weren’t very close, but he was kinda relieved to know there’d be another friendly face on the ship.

After greeting Than on the way in, he began packing, using the sheet he’d been sent. He put music on in the background, and hardly noticed the passing of time, only breaking out of his reverie when Than came to remind him to eat.

A couple days later, he was ready to leave, Cerberus waiting patiently at the door. He gave a quick goodbye to his friends and his father, the former of whom gave promises to contact and the latter of whom just hmm-ed under his breath.

After the ship had taken off, he sat on his bed for a while, taking it all in. He was going somewhere new- how exciting!- but he knew he was going to miss his friends and family.

A knock at the door startled him out of his thoughts.

“Coming!” He said as he went to get the door.

On the other side of the door stood Hypnos, in full regalia. His departure had been much larger and more public, and Zag hoped that his brothers and mother had shown up. Charon he was almost certain of, and made a mental note to check his social media for pictures Hermes had most likely posted about his “almost-little-brother-in-law leaving us behind!! 😭😭.” Nyx and Than, though, were a little colder, and Than had made no move to leave when Zag had gotten on the ship.

“Hi!” Hypnos chirped, trying not to show the exhaustion he felt. It had been nothing but endless briefings for months prior to this, and the next four years were sure to be a nice, long break before doing it again for a whole year.

“Hi!” Zag replied, feeling slightly awkward in his far less formal tank top and shorts.

Cerberus came up between them and nosed at Hypnos’ cloak.

“Hi to you too!” Hypnos bent down and pet Cerberus to the best of his ability, mentally thanking the powers that be that he was a rather tall Doberman and not a small dog. 

Zag knew that Hypnos was his friend and his roommate’s brother, but he still was at a loss of how to act. Hypnos was, for all intents and purposes, his boss now, and he wasn’t sure whether or not he’d be expected to act accordingly.

Hypnos ended all pretenses of formality by stepping into Zag’s room and quickly shedding all jewelry and reminders of his station, leaving him in a long, elegant dress that crumpled beneath him when he flopped on Zag’s bed.

Hypnos yawned widely, and shifted to where he had a view of Zag still awkwardly standing in the doorway to his own room. Cerberus climbed on the bed next to him, and laid his head on Hypnos’ stomach.

It was a scene which made Zag vaguely want to join in and rest, but he was too wired to do so. Instead, he pulled the chair out from the desk facing the bed, and sat down with the back of the chair pressed to his chest.

“You excited?” Zag asked Hypnos, lightly drumming his fingers against the cool plastic.

Hypnos made a noncommittal noise and seemed to settle into the bed more. “You don’t mind if I nap here, do you?”

Zag shook his head, and Hypnos nodded slightly before falling asleep so quickly it startled Zag. He waited a few minutes before beginning to unpack, trying his hardest to remain quiet so as not to disrupt Hypnos. After dropping an exercise weight rather loudly and realizing that Hypnos hadn’t even stirred, he abandoned all attempts at noiselessness and just began placing things, noise be damned. 

He was so wrapped up in it he failed to notice when Hypnos woke up, studied him from behind for a few seconds (it was a nice view! sue him!), then rolled over and went back to sleep.

Zag was in the middle of organizing the desk when his communicator pinged, alerting him that dinner was being served in the cafeteria. 

“What time is it?” Hypnos mumbled from the bed.

Zag tilted the communicator to turn the screen on and told him.

Hypnos sighed and sat up, yawning as he stretched. He sat and blinked for a couple of seconds, then said, “We have to go to a special dinner with the other politicians and stuff. After today we’ll be able to go to the cafeteria, though.”

“When does it start?” Zag asked, trying to remember where he’d put his formal clothes.

Hypnos smiled guiltily and responded, “Five minutes ago?”

Zag’s eyes widened and he sprung into action, grabbing his clothes from the drawer and stumbling slightly as he went into the bathroom to change. Hypnos began to reluctantly put his own uniform on. By the time Zag came out, striking quite the figure in the fitted vestments, Hypnos had managed to pull everything on, and was fiddling with the clasp of the cloak.

“Here, let me get that for you.” Zag offered, and went to stand in front of Hypnos, where he reached up slightly and fastened the cloak.

The two stood in front of each other for a couple of seconds, Hypnos mentally preparing himself for human interaction and Zag trying to recall his training. Then, Hypnos sighed and moved around Zag to get to the door, and Zag fell into position beside him.

A week passed with Zag at Hypnos’ side almost constantly (even in sleep, to an extent, as their rooms were next to each other) before Hypnos once again came to his room for a nap. Then, over time, this became a regular occurrence. Hypnos would nap on Zag’s bed almost every day, and when he wasn’t napping, the two of them talked. Zag told Hypnos about growing up with a father who simultaneously ignored and expected everything from his son; his mother, who he had only met again recently, who used to worked as a diplomat but had retired to a small, idyllic, relatively unknown planet; the important people in his life, like his mentor Achilles and his friends. In return, Hypnos told Zag about growing up in a family that seemed to excel at everything; days spent sleeping because he couldn’t disappoint people in his dreams; going to school to learn how to talk to people and accidentally gaining importance. They talked about loneliness and happiness, highs and lows. 

It brought them closer together, and as weeks turned to months, Hypnos found himself looking forward to talks with Zagreus. He would wake up, giddy for their next interaction, and anticipate what he might say today. Maybe he’d make a comment about Zag’s haircut or a joke about how Cerberus like him better than Zag. Thinking about Zag made him smile involuntarily, and when the two of them talked, Hypnos sometimes felt his cheeks warm at Zag’s laugh and demeanor.

About four months into their voyage, he realized what this meant.

Oh.

Oh no.

It’s not like he hadn’t talked to Zag before- he did live with his brother- but the close quarters made everything… different. It felt like it was just the two of them, an island floating in a ship of 200 people. Maybe that was it- he just wanted to feel close to only other person on board he interacted with regularly. It couldn’t possibly be like, an actual crush, right? Yeah, no. It wasn’t.

That’s what he told himself, at least.

Zag, on the other hand, was oblivious to Hypnos’ internal struggle. He liked hanging out with Hypnos. They’d gone from acquaintances to best friends quickly, and Zag came to treasure their (many) moments together. He liked the teasing and jokes, and came to find his little yawn-stretches after a good nap rather cute. 

He had a crush on Hypnos.

He didn’t try to deny it or push it out of his mind, but he also didn’t really acknowledge it either. Hypnos was funny and adorable and really, really disliked tomatoes but always got an extra helping of pasta or whatever food with tomatoes was being served so he could give it to Zag, who he knew loved tomatoes. Zag couldn’t imagine not having a bit of a crush on Hypnos. He figured most people who met him did, because how could they not? With his unruly curls and dimples he was classic crush material.

So the first year passed. 

The second year began with a party, a celebration of “making it one year without any major incidents” (the ship captain’s words). Hypnos and Zag attended, once again in their stuffy formal wear, but ditched halfway through in favor of grabbing any food they could stuff in their pockets and talking in Zag’s room until long after the partygoers had trickled back into their rooms.

With the second year came new responsibilities. Hypnos’ monthly meetings turned into two, and he began to attend refresher courses on the language he’d be expected to use once the ship landed. Zag found himself standing outside rooms more often than not, and poor Cerberus’ walks went from three times a day to two. Their hang out time was cut in half virtually overnight.

So… why did Hypnos’ crush on Zagreus only worsen? 

They were both interacting with other people, and he had work to do. Why couldn’t he seem to pry Zag from his mind? He had to focus! But all he could focus on was Zag’s smile, playing on repeat in some sadistic part of his brain, and he wondered idly if someone had invented some sort of “cure” for a crush. Zag was his brother’s roommate! Than probably had a crush on him or something, because there’s no other way he’d let anyone live with him. He’d barely tolerated Hypnos when they’d shared a room as children!

(Than did have a small crush on Zagreus, but was finding out quickly that distance did not, in fact, make the heart fonder.)

Hypnos didn’t sleep a lot at night. Normally, sleep wasn’t a problem for him; he’d always been one to fall asleep easily and deeply. Now, though, his thoughts played on an endless loop, and he only really slept when he was in Zag’s room, surrounded by the noises of Zagreus and Cerberus.

Zag found that his crush on Hypnos was quickly blossoming into something much deeper, and didn’t really mind it. He wondered, idly, if there was a chance of Hypnos feeling the same, but didn’t want to jeopardize the mission (they still had eight more years together!) or their friendship. Besides, there was something beautiful in just the feeling of spending time with someone you l- cared for. Cared for, and he figured it was better to enjoy it.

For a short while, anyway.

It was difficult to deny the dreams he had of holding hands with Hypnos and going on dates (among other, less wholesome things), and he began to wonder more and more often if those dreams had a chance of becoming a reality.

Probably not. Hypnos was busy and important; he probably didn’t think about Zag half as much as Zag thought about him.

Three years came and went, with the budding feelings between the two only deepening. It caused some slight frustration, but neither of them was willing to talk about it, and behind their backs, the rest of the ship began to take bets on when they were going to get together. 

It didn’t happen in Year Three, when they were shoved into a closet “on accident” and spent the time talking about the things they had to finish that day.

It didn’t happen in Year Four, when Cerberus got sick and the two of them squished themselves into the same chair with Hypnos’ formal cloak draped on top of them like a blanket. It had been a cute scene, and was trending with #zagnos on social media for an hour before another diplomat had requested it get taken down. 

Finally, the day came for them to land. The whole ship was abuzz with people hurrying to and fro in anxious attempts to make sure they and their belongings were ready to depart. They’d been told to leave the bulk of their belongings on the ship, as it was the same one they’d be returning to and they would still have access to it, but this left people unsure as to whether they should over or underpack. 

Zag had decided that one backpack would probably be enough, seeing as they’d been told that decorations in the rooms they were to be provided were forbidden. He also had a tote bag with Cerberus’ things packed, and was more or less just waiting for the ship to be cleared to unload.

Hypnos, on the other hand, had three pre-packed, unopened suitcases filled with various clothes of the local fashion (enough to make sure they wouldn’t repeat; the higher-ups wanted to make an impression of their wealth); a bag of cosmetics and hair products (no longer would the unruly mess of curls reign); five briefcases with information he’d studied front to back multiple times during the trip; another duffle bag with sleep clothes; and a bag with all of his electronics. 

Zag picked up as much as he could, and the rest was carried by an envoy sent from the local government, leaving Hypnos free to smile and shake hands and generally do the job he’d been sent there to do. 

It was a stark difference from the Hypnos Zag had gotten to know, and it shocked him somewhat to see how quickly he’d changed from Hypnos, Zag’s best friend and the guy he’s in love with, to a charming diplomat with a winning smile that anyone would be hard-pressed to dislike.

Zag must’ve been hard-pressed, then, because he found himself disliking this version of Hypnos. There was something… insincere about it. It was all fake, a show put on to help Hypnos do his job better.

Well, he was only here to help Hypnos do his job, right? It wasn’t for him to like or dislike things. 

There was to be a party for those who had finally touched down on solid ground, and as Zag changed into a less formal outfit for the event, he heard a knock at the door. He opened it, then frowned, realizing that there was no one there. He turned to go back to getting ready, but not even five seconds later, the knock sounded again. Again, he opened the door, only to find no one there. He went outside and walked around a little, but didn’t see anyone. He went back to his room, where the knocking sounded again, and realized that the knocking was coming from somewhere not the front door. 

Five minutes later, he found a shallow dip in the wall, and when he touched it, a smooth voice asked, “Name?”

“Uh, Zagreus?” He answered.

A beep sounded, and the voice once again asked, “Name?”

“Zagreus… Plutonic?” He replied again, questioningly.

A ding sounded, and a portion of the wall swung outward to reveal Hypnos, still in the same outfit he’d been wearing earlier. Hypnos smiled widely at him- that same smile that he wore during their hang out sessions, not the one he wore as a diplomatic mask- but quickly flushed purple.

Zag raised an eyebrow questioningly.

“You’re uh, you-“ Hypnos stammered. “You’re not wearing a shirt, silly!”

Zag looked down and realized Hypnos was right. He smiled as he teased, “And? Do you like what you see?”

Hypnos just giggled, a high-pitched, somewhat frantic noise. 

Zagreus put on a shirt as Hypnos moved into the room, sitting daintily on the edge of the bed because his ornate clothing stopped him from doing anything else. Cerberus came up to him and wagged his tail expectantly, and Hypnos reached out and pet his head, making sure to scratch the area behind his ears that he knew he liked.

Zag watched them fondly. He’d always taken it as a good sign that Hypnos and Cerberus got along so well, and had told his mom such. She’d agreed with him, with that bright look in her eyes that hinted she knew more than she let on. 

When Zag was ready, the two of them left together, Cerberus asleep on the bed. 

At the party itself, the two of them basically stuck to the edges, chatting with other people occasionally. Eventually, an alcoholic drink was thrust into their hands. Zag looked questioningly at Hypnos, who nodded slightly as he put his own drink down. Zag grinned and drank it all down in one gulp, to the cheers of the other partygoers. He began to mingle with the crowd, leaving Hypnos standing awkwardly in the corner. Some other diplomats joined him, and they spent time murmuring about upcoming responsibilities and travel memories.

About an hour later, Hypnos felt a tug on his arm, and looked up to see Zagreus, cheeks flushed, smiling widely as he pulled him to the dancefloor. Hypnos made half-hearted excuses to the other diplomats before turning and anxiously following Zag to the dancefloor, leaving several knowing faces in his wake.

The two of them danced for a while, laughing wildly and holding each other’s hands in turn, high on the music and each other’s company. Eventually, the two of them ended up in a different corner than they’d started off in, smiling widely, faces flushed with exertion. 

It seemed to happen in slow motion. Hypnos was smiling widely and giggling breathlessly, staring down at Zag. Zag was looking up at him brightly, fondness crinkling the corners of his eyes. Zag pushed up, slightly, onto the tips of his toes. Hypnos leaned down, unconsciously. 

Their lips met.

After a second, Hypnos jerked back. Zag was drunk, and Hypnos felt like he was taking advantage of the situation. 

He cleared his throat and turned around, mood suddenly soured. “Let’s go back to the rooms, I think you’ve had too much to drink.”

Zag wrinkled his nose and slurred, “Nuh I haven’t.”

Hypnos grabbed his arm and led him out anyway, exchanging goodbyes with those who came to talk to them. When they got to Zag’s room, he watched him go inside, then went to his own room.

He slept, exhausted physically, mentally, and emotionally.

When he woke up, he was still tired, but he got out of bed and forced himself to get ready for the day, even though he felt like sleeping for the next decade at least. 

Zag woke up with a slight headache and a feeling of embarrassment. He really just… HAD to go and kiss Hypnos, huh? And Hypnos had clearly not felt the same and what HAPPENED to “I technically work for him so this is a bad idea”?

He really should’ve just… stayed sober.

“I fucked up, Cerberus.” He told his dog morosely, who just stared back at him.

He sighed, took some medicine, fed his dog, and put on his uniform, feeling slight dread as he exited his room. Hypnos was standing outside, and didn’t look at him as he began to walk to his first appointment of the day. 

It was hard for Hypnos to muster up his usual charm, but nothing went sideways, so he took that as a win. Meals were awkward, what with Zagreus sitting in front of him but neither of them talking. 

It continued like this for a week before one of them decided to break the silence.

Zag knocked on the door separating their rooms late one night, and opened it after hearing a returning knock. He walked into Hypnos’ room, noting the fact that it was messier than he’d ever seen it.

“I,” He began, then paused slightly. “I just wanted to apologize. It was wrong of me, and I can only-”

“Apologize for what?” Hypnos butted in, confused.

“Well… the kiss?” Zagreus responded, just as confused.

“Wait.” Hypnos said, eyes narrowing slightly as he continued, “I’m the one who should apologize to you, I took advantage of the fact tha-”

“Why are you apologizing to me? I’m the one with the-” Zag made a vague hand motion, “feelings.”

Hypnos stared at him. “I thought… I was the one with feelings?”

The two of them stared at each other for a while before breaking into laughter.

“We’re so stupid!” Hypnos exclaimed between fits of laughter, and Zag just laughed as he sat on the bed so as to not fall down. 

After a while, their laughter ceased. 

Hypnos leaned into Zag’s shoulder, and Zag put an arm loosely around Hypnos waist. Then he pulled away slightly, and asked, “Should we try this again?”

Hypnos nodded, purple flush rising in his cheeks, and the two of them kissed.

[tinyshe]

COVID Vaccine Mandates Strongly Opposed in Europe, US as Failures Increase Analysis by

Barbara Loe Fisher

August 10, 2021

Since coronavirus pandemic lockdowns were implemented by many governments in 2020, people around the world have held largely peaceful protests against unprecedented social distancing restrictions that are devastating global economies and ruining people's lives.1,2,3,4

Now, faced with being ordered to obey new laws that require them to be injected with COVID-19 vaccines in order to enter public spaces or hold a job, on July 24, 2021 — World Freedom Day — hundreds of thousands of people of all ages took to the streets in Australia, United Kingdom, France, Italy, Greece and Germany to publicly challenge oppressive public health laws.5,6

The messages on the signs they held were diverse but they were united in pushing back against government overreach.

The brave determination of people, in democracies around the world who are publicly defending civil liberties — freedom of thought, speech, conscience and assembly — and the human right to informed consent to medical risk taking, demonstrates that the spirit of freedom lives in the hearts and minds of people everywhere. Both those who gather in the public squares of cities big and small and those who are watching are inspired by this commitment to defending liberty.

In the United States, no large demonstrations have been held yet, but polls reveal the nation is sharply divided about COVID-19 vaccine mandates.

A Politico/Harvard poll taken in late June 2021 found that Americans were evenly split on whether children should be required to get the COVID-19 vaccine to go to school and more than half of employed Americans are against COVID-19 vaccine requirements for holding a job, while almost 70 percent of Americans oppose being required to show proof of a COVID-19 vaccination to enter a store or business.7

A recent CS Mott Children's Hospital poll found that more than half of parents in the U.S. with children between the ages of three and 11 say it is unlikely they will give their children the COVID-19 vaccine.8

Australia: 'The lockdown Is Killing Us, Not COVID'

With a population of 25 million people, Australians have been subjected to repeated strict lockdowns over the past 18 months and the government's "stay at home" lockdown in early July 2021 was imposed on New South Wales, Victoria and South Australia, where more than half the country's population lives. The 30-day rigid social distancing restrictions were enacted after 176 new daily infections were registered in the whole country.9

In response, thousands of Australians gathered in Sydney, Melbourne and Brisbane on July 24 to protest the lockdown.

Social distancing restrictions that have been imposed include compulsory masking in all indoor non-personal residence settings; most schools closed; restrictions on how far people can travel from their homes; no going to work except for designated "essential" employees (who must be tested every three days); exercising and gathering outside only in groups of two; shopping only for essential items; attendance at funerals limited to 10 people but weddings are banned, and other limits on person-to-person social interaction.

In what the U.K. newspaper Daily Mail described as "frenzied crowds" coming together on July 24, there were estimates that as many as 10,000 protesters marched from Victoria Park to Town Hall in the central business district.

Carrying signs calling for "freedom" and "the truth" and "I don't consent" and "Wake up Australia!" and "We are your employers, we are not your slaves" and "unmasked, untested, unvaxxed, unafraid" and "I am not a biohazard" and "Our kids are not your guinea pigs" and "No false tests, no false cases, no lockdowns," one protester said, "We don't give a f*** mate, this lockdown is killing us." Another agreed: "I'm against lockdowns, they're killing my business."

Dozens of protesters climbed onto the roofs of a train station and Woolworths store as the crowd gathered around Town Hall singing the Australian national anthem. One observer said on social media, "Protest stretches right down Broadway! Absolutely massive turnout."

The Sydney protest was mostly peaceful but when mounted police told the demonstrators to disperse or they would be pepper sprayed, some broke through a police barrier and threw plastic bottles and plants at officers. The New South Wales Police Minister confirmed 57 people were arrested and charged and a "strike force has been established to investigate who was in attendance."10

On July 28, the Australian Prime Minister called in military personnel to help enforce social distancing restrictions in Sydney and extended the lockdown for another month after 239 new cases of COVID-19 were detected in the city of five million people within a 24-hour period. Residents will be forced to wear a mask outside their homes and must stay within 3 miles of their homes, only going out for "essential" activities like food shopping.11

On July 30, the Australian government used helicopters and the Army to help police enforce its 'Zero Covid' lockdown in Sydney and issue $500 fines for failure to mask.12 The BBC reported that Australian Defense Force soldiers will begin conducting unarmed patrols of the streets this week.13

According to media reports, sirens could be heard throughout the city and helicopters blared messages that 'this is public health order — do not break rules — you will be found and fined.'

Road blocks were set up in a military show of force in response to the public demonstrations earlier in the week, although soldiers are under police command. Starting this week, military personnel will accompany police going door to door to ensure that people who have tested positive for COVID-19 are isolating.14

Reuters reports that the Australian COVID-19 vaccination rate for adults stands at 18 percent and the Prime Minister has said 80 percent of adults must get vaccinated before the border, which has been sealed since the pandemic began, will be re-opened.15

Britain: 'No Forced Testing, No Forced Vaccines'

In May 2021, a 12 mile procession of tens of thousands of people ended at Parliament Square in a protest against continuing lockdowns and vaccine passports as a condition of accessing public venues.16

On July 19, the British government lifted the COVID-19 lockdown that had been in place for over a year, eliminating masking requirements, work from home, and limits on numbers of people who can gather together, which allowed for the full opening of restaurants and other public venues without social distancing restrictions.17

Just five days after the lockdown restrictions were lifted, thousands of people made their way to Trafalgar Square on July 24 to signal their opposition to potential future lockdowns, as well as to protest against the showing of COVID-19 vaccine passports as a condition of entering public spaces.18

There were banners draped in front of the speaker podium saying, "the public demands live debate" and "Science is not science without discussion" and demonstrators held signs that said "No forced testing, no forced vaccines" and "We are the lions in a world of sheep" and "If you tolerate this, your children will be next."19

Toward the end of the July 24 demonstration, the huge gathering in Trafalgar Square in unison sang, "You'll Never Walk Alone:"

When you walk through a storm Hold your head up high, And don't be afraid of the dark. At the end of a storm is a golden sky And the sweet silver song of a lark.

Walk on through the wind, Walk on through the rain, Though your dreams be tossed and blown. Walk on, Walk on With hope in your heart And you'll never walk alone, You'll never walk alone.

The United Kingdom, which has a population of 57 million, ranks in the top 20 most COVID vaccinated nations, with an adult vaccination rate of over 57 percent.20

France: 'My Body Is Mine' and 'It Is My Choice'

Paris, France and the cities of Marseille, Montpelier, Nantes and Toulouse saw tens of thousands of people take to the streets on World Freedom Day to protest against a proposed law that would require all health care workers to get COVID-19 vaccinations or lose their jobs.

People will be barred from entering restaurants or other public venues, effectively preventing them from participating in public life unless they have a health pass showing proof of COVID-19 vaccination, recovery from the disease or a recent negative COVID-19 test.

A care assistant at a Strasbourg nursing home expressed her disgust with the proposed law, saying it is "the blackmail of caregivers who were at the fronts line during the first wave and who are now threatened with "no more pay" and even being fired."21

A huge crowd of 160,000 people or more, many chanting "freedom, freedom" and carrying signs saying "stop the dictatorship" and "Big Pharma shackles freedom" and "no to the pass of shame" and "vaccines: fake freedom" and "don't touch our children" were met by police deploying tear gas and a water cannon used against some of them.22

Reuters reported that scuffles broke out at the Champs-Elysees and the Gare Saint-Lazare railway station.23 The demonstrators met at the Bastille plaza and marched through eastern Paris and also gathered at Place Trocadero near the Eiffel Tower to protest the required carrying of a "health pass."24

Just two days after witnessing several hundred thousand people voicing their opposition to the proposed new public health law, on July 26, the French Parliament voted to pass the law that will take effect this week.25,26

Five days later, on July 31, several hundred thousand French citizens of all ages again flooded into the streets of Paris with signs saying "We are not guinea pigs" and "It is our choice" and "My body is mine" and "Health terror — I will not submit" and "the 4th wave is us" in opposition to the new COVID-19 vaccine and vaccine passport.27

According to media reports, four marches dovetailed into the Place de la Bastille, with health care workers in white coats leading some of them, and were met by waiting squads of gendarmes and CRS riot police with water cannons. Demonstrators also gathered at the Arc de Triomphe at the top of the Champs-Elysees and at the Villiers metro station in northwest Paris.

Reportedly, about 150 other protest events also took place in cities around France, which has a population of about 67 million and an estimated COVID vaccination rate of about 47.5 percent28 or more.

Italy: 'Enough Dictatorship: No Green Passes'

Thousands of people gathered in Rome, Genova, Milan, Naples, Turin and scores of other cities in Italy on July 24 to voice their opposition to the government's imposition of social distancing and COVID-19 vaccine requirements on citizens, including a requirement to carry the "Green Pass," which is an extension of the European Union's digital COVID certificate.29

The Green Pass will be required to enter cinemas, museums, indoor swimming pools, sports stadiums or eat indoors at restaurants, proving that a person has been vaccinated, has had a recent negative COVID-19 test or has recovered from the coronavirus infection.30

Chanting and carrying signs that said "Freedom" and "No Green Pass" and "Down with the dictatorship" and "Better to die free than live like slaves" and "against vaccination obligations" and "government does terrorism" and "shame-shame,"31,32 reportedly about 80 cities in Italy saw demonstrations on World Freedom Day.

These included an estimated nine thousand people in Milan, who marched in procession to the Piazza Duomo, the Galleria Vittoria Emanuele and to the Piazza Scala in front of the Town Hall. One banner said "Big Pharma out of the state. No to multinationals."

About five thousand people gathered in Piazza Castello in Turin with signs that said "We want to have the freedom to choose – the freedom to go wherever we want without being tied to a sheet."

In Rome, where there have been anti-lockdown demonstrations over the past year to protest then closure of cafes, bars and restaurants,33 an estimated two thousand demonstrated and the police intervened to disperse the crowd with armored vehicles.34 Italy has a population of about 60 million people, with nearly 52 percent vaccinated for COVID-19.35

Greece: 'Hands Off Our Children'

Thousands of people gathered in Omonia Square in the center of Athens on July 24 to express their opposition to the government's COVID-19 vaccine mandate. They carried signs saying "No mandatory vaccinations" and "No blackmail to dismiss" and "No separation of Greeks" and "hands off our children."

The leader of the anti-COVID vaccine movement in Greece, cardiologist Faidon Vovolis, MD addressed the huge crowd, which, according to Athens News, included "not only anti-vaccination activists, but also food and tourism entrepreneurs, clergy, citizens disaffected by the overall government leadership over the pandemic, and vaccinated citizens who view recent government measures as anti-democractic."36

Greek police used tear gas and water cannon to disperse the demonstrators, who had rallied outside the Parliament building to protest COVID-19 vaccine requirements for workers, such as health care workers. Reuters said that about 45 percent of Greece's 11 million population is already vaccinated.37

Germany: 'For Peace, Freedom, Truth'

Berlin has been the site of several large demonstrations against lockdowns and COVID vaccine passports over the past year.38 On Aug. 1, 2021, tens of thousands of citizens marched in the streets of Berlin to protest lockdowns that have restricted dining indoors at restaurants or staying in a hotel and requirements to provide proof of COVID vaccination, defying a ban by German lower and upper administrative courts on public demonstrations.39

Berlin's administrative court had refused to authorize 13 demonstrations, some of which had been organized by the Querdenker (Lateral thinker) anti-lockdown movement.40

Berlin's police department deployed more than 2,000 officers armed with batons, pepper spray and water cannon as the crowds made their way from Berlin's Charlottenburg neighborhood, past the Tiergarten park and on to the Brandenberg Gate.

Reportedly, police in heavily armed vans dragged protesters across roads and into the vans with marchers shouting for freedom and the lifting of mandatory masking and travel bans. Protesters continued to march in the evening through the city streets and 600 people were arrested.41 Germany has a population of 83 million and 52 percent have been fully vaccinated.42

Human Rights Watch: COVID-19 Triggers Wave of Free Speech Abuse

On Feb. 11, 2021, Human Rights Watch published a report called for an end to excessive restrictions on free speech and peaceful demonstration where people are criticizing COVID-19 lockdowns, mandatory masking and other social distancing regulations that restrict civil liberties. The human rights organization said:43

"At least 83 governments worldwide have used the Covid-19 pandemic to justify violating the exercise of free speech and peaceful assembly … Authorities have attacked, detained, prosecuted, and in some cases killed critics, broken up peaceful protests, closed media outlets, and enacted vague laws criminalizing speech that they claim threatens public health.

The victims include journalists, activists, healthcare workers, political opposition groups, and others who have criticized government responses to the coronavirus … Governments and other state authorities should immediately end excessive restrictions on free speech in the name of preventing the spread of Covid-19."

Decentralized Government in US Makes a National COVID-19 Vaccine Mandate More Difficult

Unlike centralized governments in Europe and many other parts of the world, the founders of the United States of America ensured in the U.S. Constitution that this country would operate with lawmaking power shared between national, state and local governments.44

The fact that lawmaking power in the U.S. does not solely reside with the federal government, which is composed of the legislative (U.S. Congress), Executive (President/federal agencies) and Judicial (federal courts) branches, so far has protected the U.S. population from being subjected to the same kinds of uniform lockdown restrictions and now, the same kinds of COVID-19 vaccine mandates that are being implemented in European Union countries and other nations with centralized federal governments.

Since most public health laws in the U.S. fall under the legal jurisdiction of states, if a resident does not like the lockdown, masking, social distancing or COVID-19 vaccine mandates in the state they are living in, they simply can move to a different state that does not have the same kind of oppressive public health laws.

This is one reason why, although there have been smaller anti-lockdown and anti-COVID-19 vaccine mandate demonstrations in the U.S. over the past 15 months, some of them protesting COVID-19 vaccine requirements for health care workers,45 so far there have not been massive national demonstrations in the U.S. like those taking place in Europe and other parts of the world.

U.S. Government Pushes for an 85 Percent COVID-19 Vaccination Rate

As of July 28, about 60 percent of the U.S. population of 332 million people age 12 and older had received at least one dose of COVID vaccine and reportedly 50 percent, or about 165 million Americans, are "fully" vaccinated.46 As the third largest country in the world, the U.S. has a high COVID-19 vaccination rate compared to other countries, with only 25 countries recording a higher vaccination rate than the U.S.47

According to Johns Hopkins University Coronavirus Resource Center, the country with the largest population in the world at 1.5 billion people — China — has a 16 percent COVID vaccination rate; the country with the second largest population in the world at 1.4 billion people — India — has a 7.4 percent COVID vaccination rate; and Russia, with a population of 146 million people, has a 17 COVID vaccination rate.48

However, U.S. government officials are pushing for an 85 percent COVID vaccination rate in the U.S.,49 even as a former FDA commissioner says that a combination of natural acquired immunity and vaccine acquired immunity is likely rapidly achieving an 85 percent herd immunity rate with the Delta variant in the U.S. population.50

Half to Two-Thirds of Americans Oppose Punitive COVID-19 Vaccine Mandates as Companies Begin to Mandate

Even though polls show that one-half to two-thirds of Americans oppose COVID-19 vaccine mandates, depending upon the setting,51 on July 29, the President announced that all federal workers and contractors must show proof of COVID-19 vaccination or mask and social distance at all times and get constantly tested.52

The federal government also is urging corporations, local and state government agencies, medical facilities and other institutions to make vaccination a condition of employment.

Some companies, like Google, Facebook, Morgan Stanley, Ascension Health, The Washington Post, Saks Fifth Avenue, Lyft and Uber, Walmart and Disney have already mandated employees to get COVID-19 shots to continuing working for the companies.53,54 On July 30, Broadway theaters announced that all members of the audience will be required to show proof of COVID-19 vaccination and must keep a mask on at all times except when eating or drinking.55

Opposition Grows as CDC Admits Fully Vaccinated Persons Can Get and Efficiently Transmit COVID-19

After lifting national masking recommendations for COVID vaccinated persons in May 2021 with the assurance that the vaccine was effective in preventing symptomatic SARS-CoV-2 infection,56 on July 27, CDC officials abruptly reversed course and said that Americans, whether vaccinated or not, should wear a mask indoors outside their homes in certain places.57,58

They said they based that policy change on new information that the COVID-19 vaccines do not reliably prevent infection and transmission of the Delta variant of SARS-CoV-2 and that the viral load in vaccinated persons who get infected is as high as the viral load in unvaccinated persons who get infected.59,60

CDC officials said the new federal indoor masking policy especially applies to adults in "high risk" areas where there are more people being infected with the Delta variant. The masking directive also applies to all unvaccinated children over age two, as well as vaccinated children over age 12 attending school, and additionally includes all teachers, school staff and visitors to schools whether vaccinated or not.61

Reuters reported on July 24 that vaccinated people made up 75 percent of recent COVID-19 cases identified in Singapore, but vaccinated cases were associated with mild symptoms:

"Of Singapore's 1,096 locally transmitted infections in the last 28 days, 484 or about 44 percent were in fully vaccinated people, while 30 percent were partially vaccinated and just over 25 percent were unvaccinated."62

The percentage ratio of infected vaccinated to infected unvaccinated persons in Singapore matches that of a recent SARS-CoV-2 outbreak in Massachusetts. On July 30, Associated Press reported that information in CDC documents revealed that 75 percent of the Provincetown outbreak occurred among fully vaccinated individuals.

About 80 percent of them experienced COVID-19 symptoms, with the most common being cough, headache, sore throat, muscle aches and fever.63

U.S. States Push Back Against COVID-19 Vaccine Mandates

Over the past year, Americans have been taking action at the state and local level to block COVID-19 vaccine mandates. A number of states have passed laws that restrict COVID-19 vaccine mandates and "vaccine passports" that bar people from entering public spaces.

Among the states that have passed laws prohibiting COVID-19 vaccine passports or COVID-19 vaccine mandates in some way are Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Arizona, Oklahoma, Florida, Idaho, Iowa, Indiana, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Missouri, Montana, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Tennessee, Texas, and Utah.64,65,66

On July 29, the Governor of Texas signed an executive order prohibiting state government agencies from mandating COVID-19 vaccine being distributed under Emergency Use Authorization (EUA) and banning public or private entities that receive state funds from denying entry to those who are not vaccinated and, additionally, banning companies, state and local agencies — including school districts — from requiring mask wearing.

He said that Texans, "have the individual right and responsibility to decide for themselves and their children whether they will wear masks, open their businesses, and engage in leisure activities."67

Governors of several other states also have issued executive orders prohibiting COVID-19 vaccine mandates and some local and state governments have prohibited mask mandates.68,69 But some city and state governments, like New York City and California, have created legal requirements that force state employees to get vaccinated as a condition of keeping their jobs.70

On July 26, the nation's largest healthcare worker union, United Healthcare Workers, demonstrated in New York City against employee COVID-19 vaccine mandates.71 So far, the COVID-19 vaccine mandate as a condition of employment is also opposed by the American Postal Workers Union,72 Federal Law Enforcement Officers Association, and United Auto Workers.73

It's Up to You to Act Now

With military soldiers patrolling the streets in Sydney, Australia and police with water cannons and tear gas facing tens of thousands of people protesting against vaccine passports and COVID-19 vaccine mandates in the streets of London, Paris, Rome, Athens and many other cities in Europe, there should be no doubt where the enforcement of mandatory vaccination policies are headed in the U.S. if Americans fail to proactively take action now.

There is no question that we are dealing with a global assault on civil liberties and human rights when public discussion and debate about government policy is censored74,75 and peaceful dissent is considered a crime. Public health laws that respect civil liberties and the informed consent ethic can only be secured if the lawmakers we elect value civil liberties and defend informed consent rights. Become fully informed about who you are voting for and never miss an opportunity to vote.

I and the supporters of the non-profit charity the National Vaccine Information Center (NVIC) have worked since 1982 to prevent vaccine injuries and deaths through public education. We have publicly defended the ethical principle of informed consent to medical risk taking and other human rights that include freedom of thought, speech and conscience.

In 2010, we launched the NVIC Advocacy Portal, a free online communications and advocacy network to empower Americans to work in their own communities to secure informed consent protections in public health laws.

Now more than ever, it is time to get to know your local, county and state elected representatives – from your school board members and county supervisors to your local sheriff and lawmakers – who represent you in your local and state governments. Establish a personal relationship with those who make laws that govern you and your family.

Have a conversation with them now about why you believe it is important to protect civil liberties and vaccine informed consent rights in public health laws. Provide them with well referenced vaccine information from NVIC.org and register and join with thousands of others in your state working to protect the legal right to make a voluntary vaccination decision by becoming a user of the NVIC Advocacy Portal at NVICAdvocacy.org.

Actively participate in the democratic process that has defined who we are as a Constitutional Republic since the US Constitution was ratified in 1788. Be the one who never has to say you did not do today what you could have done to change tomorrow.

[huearmy]

Life is Beautiful - I

Summary: You are a glass half full person, your life motto is "Life is too short to... Insert something and anything here". During your whole life you wanted something more, and even not knowing what it is, you put yourself to find out and get it, experiencing everything  brilliant that the world offers - within the measure of what is safe, of course. The curious thing is that your way of living ended up rousing  the interest of two vampires. One who sees beauty in everything and  loves to exist, currently working with suicide prevention; and another one who no longer sees grace in things, in that boring immortality that never ends, and only complains about the Netflix catalog all the time.

Pairing: Jimin x reader / Taehyung x reader.

Genre: fluff, angst, future smut (very soft, ok?)...

Words:  7509.

Rating: +18

Warnings: As much as my writing is soft and light, and as these are not the main topic of the story, treated in a non-descriptive way, there are sensitive themes from the beginning of the first chapter to the end of the fic that can trigger sensitive people, like depression, suicide, addictions in general - Jimin literally works at a suicide prevention center here. SO PLEASE! Read responsibly, my intention when dealing with topics like this is always 1) dealing with them in myself, as a way of putting out part of my own healing process 2) generating identification in other people, so they can go through the difficult time a little less alone. THIS IS A STORY THAT SEES THE WORLD WITH POSITIVITY.

Chapter II Chapter III .

After some centuries of not living, all vampires go through a kind of midlife crisis in which everything loses its grace and eternity becomes endless boredom. Nothing new happens, humans are born, sometimes they are relevant to world history, they become vampire food or they die dull. Vampires do not need to sleep or use the bathroom, nor to feed more than once a month, so the days are long, and often lonely, which leads many of them to stand still without moving, looking at nothing until their thirst quits, forcing them to go after a pulsating neck. Many go through this phase as serial killers, with killing as their only source of pleasure, others prefer to hibernate in some dark place or tomb, because false death is more interesting than false life. Some never get past the phase.

Jimin is not like that. With almost a thousand years of existence he is totally in love with life. Every day when the sun rises and the sunlight forces him to stay indoors so as not to burst into flames, he spends his hours with a smile on his face, engaging in small banal hobbies, such as gardening or online courses at distance - after almost a decade of doing this, Jimin already has fifty-two certificates in different areas, and he is pretty pride of it. When night comes and he can go out and see the world it’s even more interesting, because humans ’nightlife isn’t as hectic as daytime, so those who live in those dark hours are different. There are those who do wrong things and commit crimes, those who have double lives or who keep secrets, there are people working to protect and save, like doctors and police, there are night guards and twenty-four hours convenience store attendants, groups of friends who spend the night partying until dawn, and those who feel lonely in their empty apartments unable to sleep... And this is the part that he likes the most: people.

He likes to meet random people in the empty metro, buy a drink for a girl who doesn't take her eyes off him and then dance with her, strike up a conversation with a homeless man under a marquee because he knows the guy must be lonely. Watching and learning about other lives keeps him alive, more than the blood he needs to drink.

He likes to get temporary jobs to have some human experience. He has worked in pizzerias, both in the kitchen - he was not very good, so he was put in the dishwasher - both in deliveries, and at a gas station, as a hotel receptionist... But now it looks like he found a job he wants to stay in, so much that it has been a year and he has not yet resigned. Perhaps Jimin has found his calling.

"It's okay... You are not alone, I'm here and I'll stay until you feel good again." He said with his sweet, angelical voice. "Can you get away from the sharp objects? Please?"

The voice on the other end of the line sounded like just a choked whisper, before the answer came, fast, heavy breathing filled the air.

"No... I can't..." The female sobbed.

"Can you tell me why?" Jimin's voice was calm. "I... my legs are numb... I can't... stand up." Her breathing was erratic and desperate.

"Are you hurt? Do you need an ambulance to be sent to you?" He used his most reassuring voice possible.

"No!" She started to cry even harder. "I don't want no one... to see me... like this." Jimin bite the inside of his cheek, thinking, maybe she just wasn't able to get up  because of the anxiety attack, but she also didn't say she wasn't hurt.

Regardless of the case, he needed to make the girl trust him in order to help her.

"What is your name?" He smiled, hopping she would listen to it in his voice. "... Ana" She whispered. "Nice to meet you, Ana. Do you remember my name? I told you at the beginning of the call."

One moment of silence.

"Jimin." She said with little certainty.

"Exactly, good job. Hi, Ana." "Hi, Jimin." Despite the crying voice, she was no longer sobbing.

"Ana, can you recall the last thing you did that made you feel safe? Secure?" A sigh reached Jimin's ears. As he waited for an answer his hands moved over a sheet of paper, he was drawing a beautiful face of a girl with crayons, without paying much attention, but getting a beautiful result.

"No." She said at last.

"I know you can, Ana. No need to rush. Breath." She thought some more, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. Almost a full minute passed, the two of them silent on the call. Jimin did not press for an answer.

"I was watching Friends... with my cat." "Your cat?" Jimin smiled more spontaneously now, noticing in her voice an oscillation of affection when saying the word cat. "Talk more about your cat."

"His name is Sushi, he's fat, full of himself, and loving. He likes children, food and sleeping. I recently bought him a cute collar, it looks like a pink bow tie." She almost laughed.

"Wow...He is a lucky cat." Suddenly she started to cry again, sobbing so hard that Jimin hardly understood what she was saying.

"He ran away and hasn't come back yet... He's never been away from home  so long... He's all I have, there's no one else... I don't want to live... alone." "Is it just you and Sushi?" Jimin spoke more forcefully for her to hear over the sobs.

"Yes." She choked. "I can't get up... It hurts so much. I'm so-sorry..."

"Ana, do you need an ambulance to be sent to you?" He tried again. Silence.

"Yes." "So I will stay with you until they come to help you. You are not alone."

Jimin was a vampire in love with live, eager to live each day as if it were the most precious gift, so working in the Center of Valuing Life and Preventing Suicide was perfect. He considers himself an expert in convincing anyone that life is beautiful when he has the opportunity to say everything he thinks about. And not letting people feel alone is one of his favorite hobbies.

After all, eternity can be quite lonely, he knows how it is.

________________________________________________________________

That call is over. Jimin was searching for missing cat posts on social media. In the silent office room it was just him and three other people working, each at their separated personal table. Perhaps due to the nature of the work, or due to the late hours of the night, nobody spoke loudly or made a lot of noise when doing things, even when talking to each other, everything is always very restrained, calm.

Jimin's eyes followed the clock hands on the wall above the door. It was almost one in the morning, actually, to be exact, twelve minutes to go, so in two minutes, you would punctually enter that door with your heavy backpack full of books, of someone who just left college on the other side of the city, and after stopping at a twenty-four hours fast food to get a well-deserved burger spent an hour on a subway trip. He could already hear your footsteps down the hall, the characteristic sound of the rubber on the soles of your boots and your bunch of keys stuck in the handle of your backpack tinkling. He heard you putting your stuff in your closet and hanging your coat on the rack in the next room, and a smile formed on Jimin's face. When the hand on the clock struck ten to one and you opened the door trying not to make any noise so as not to disturb anyone's call, Jimin pretended not to notice you entering, not taking his eyes off the computer screen full of images of cute cats. You straightened up and held firmly the pair of coffee cups in your hands till the knots turned white, looking straight at him - in fact, from the moment you walked through the door you were already expecting to see Jimin sitting at his table, as always, and since then you haven't looked away. Walking in light steps - that he could hear by the way - to him who had his back to you, you tried to control the butterflies in your stomach, happy he wasn't in a call right now.

"Jimin?" You called softly, close to his ear, but not that close. Yet. Jimin contained a smile and turned around as if you had taken him by surprise. "Hey, Y/N, didn't see you there". As usual, his direct look made your heart race and you gave a nervous laugh before getting along with his flirty tone. "I bought you coffee." You handed him one of the cups. "To take the night shift a little better."

"Thanks, sweetheart."

You are the other reason Jimin didn't quit this job yet. A few weeks ago, when he was working long enough to decide to leave and go for the next adventure, you started working at the night shift, and right away you caught Jimin's attention, even though at first you didn't talk with him that much - in fact you only talked to the women on the team, and avoided the men. More than once he found himself paying attention to your emergency calls, how you talk, being positive without being suffocating for those in pain ... how you love life. After a while you started doing the same thing, a little less easily, since you don't have a vampire audition, but it was enough for you to acquire a platonic crush on Jimin, which resulted in you opening up, and you two start talking here and there. Now almost whenever you have time or money left over - college life is poor life - you bring him coffee. Jimin doesn't actually drink coffee at all, and he doesn't feel sleepy either, but he thinks it's cute that you worry for him. You see each other three to four times a week, depending on the schedule of work, and he is always eager to see you. Flirting is exciting, and he hasn't done that in a while... Like two centuries, and how it was done back there was quite different. Other times indeed.

"Did you lose your cat?" You asked, confused.

"Oh, no, I didn't." He closed the page with the photo of a white and gray cat wearing a pink bow tie.. "One friend of mine lost her cat, Sushi." "Poor thing. I hope she finds Sushi soon..." You slightly pouted.

"Me too. I'll help her." Jimin said, and the butterflies in your stomach thought it was beautiful.

Something on his desk caught your attention, a colorful draw of said cat made with crayon. Before Jimin could stop you - he was distracted by hearing your heart beat faster because of him - you picked up the stack of papers to get a closer look.

"And you drew him! How beautiful... I didn't know you were so talented." "Thank you. My friend who taught me, he is much better than me..." Jimin simply answered.

You moved on to the next sheet, where another sketch of the cat in different colors made your eyes shine. "So he must be awesome. Look at this!" Jimin was happy to be praised by you, the pink of your cheeks when speaking was a beautiful sign for him, but then he remembered what was the next drawing in your hands, and before you could see it, he cleared his throat and took them back, keeping them in the drawer. It was a drawing of a girl's pretty face. Your face. "They are not quite ready yet..." He pretended modesty.

"Oh, sorry. If you need help, just tell me. I can hang up posters or something. About finding the lost cat, I mean." You volunteered, and then looked around. "I better get to work before someone scolds me."

You went to your desk, across his, and your eyes met a few more times before as you sat down and turned on your computer. Jimin's phone rang and he forced himself to look away from your face, someone else needed him now. "Good night, my name is Jimin and you called the Life Valuation Center. Can I help?" He spoke, his voice welcome and full of affection. ________________________________________________________________

Jimin's shift ends before yours, just before three in the morning he puts things away and leaves the table ready for the person who will use the next shift, but he won't leave, even if everyone thinks so. Instead he goes to the roof to look at the stars and wait for you to leave - not that you know he is waiting for you. He was listening to a random playlist on spotify, stretching his body to the beat just because it feels good, thinking about nothing specific, just existing and feeling good about it.

The night breeze brought his scent to him, looking down from the parapet, he could see you leaving the building, with your scarf well wrapped around your neck, covering half of your face to protect you from the cold air. He doesn't understand you... It's beautiful that you want to help people who are going through a difficult time, and you've commented before that the night shift matches your other schedules, and that you like to stay up at night. However, he thinks you should consider it's not worth it. It's so late and empty when you go home, it's dangerous for a human woman, and as much as he knows that you have a pocketknife in your pocket, Jimin thinks it's silly of you. Usually he wouldn't think much about it, but it's you, and he is fond of you, he can't just do nothing about it. So even if you don't know it, he accompanies you home every night to make sure you are safe. He is only satisfied and goes home when he hears you enter your room. Sometimes he stays a little longer, sitting on the emergency stairs outside your building, listening to you walking up and down in your room, doing whatever, instead of going to sleep soon.

That's kind of creepy. He knows. But he is a vampire, he is already creepy in essence. But of course he would never watch you sleep, for exemple, this is a stalker limit that he does not intend to cross.

"Okay." He sighed as he heard you getting into bed. "I have one hour and a half before the sun rises... Let's find that cat." __________________________________________

You were awake for a couple of hours already, currently packing your books at the end of a lecture, really needing sugar to feel prepared before the last class of the day, and excited that instead of going to the study group you are a part of, you will take an experimental dance class and it's your day off, which means that instead of staying up until dawn working, you can stay up until dawn studying, and maybe sleep a little earlier. Life is too short to not take all the free trial classes available just because your schedule is already full and totally demanding. Anyways you are dead tired, wishing your body doesn't need to sleep... Since you started to work on the Life Valuation Center all your sleeping schedule went down the drain. At first your plan was to work the night shift only at the beginning, and then change your hours, but for some reason you always liked to stay up all night, also the movement of calls in this period is bigger and more specific, which helps in your internship report, and of course, in the day shift there is no Jimin... You've settled in, and now after months of this crazy, fickle routine, your body is feeling the side effects.

"Three of this rainbow donuts please." You asked at the college cafe. One because you want, two because one is not enough, three because you are greedy. Life is too short not to overeat your current favorite sugar source. You sigh to yourself, taking a seat along your friends. Your mantra for life is life is too short to...insert anything here, experimenting and doing things that you never imagined before and that your mother probably wouldn't approve a hundred percent is what moves you. Basically nothing scares you, since childhood you were courageous and fearless. You subject yourself to almost anything, within the measures of what is safe, to have good stories to tell. The world is too big to be content with just having good grades to graduate and have a good job. What you want is much more... so much more that you don't even know what... But it’s not just because you don’t know yet that you’ll stand still without going after it to find out.

"Hey, Y/N, what are you gonna do on the weekend?" Your friend, Becca, asked comfortably within her girlfriend's embrace. As usual, whenever you see the two of them together being all lovey dovey, you feel a twinge of pride in your heart, because you were responsible for them to start dating in the first place. Although your romantic life is not very interesting, without serious or successful relationships, you are a great cupid.

"For the very first time in months... I don't know. I didn't plan anything, maybe something will show up, if not I'm just going to sleep. Why?" You smiled your happy smile of eating what you like.

"Pool party. You need to get a tan, you look like a vampire with that pale, tired face of yours."

You laughed because it's true, since you started changing the day for the night, your skin has acquired a not healthy tone that you are not used to. You've been missing the sun a little.

"First of all, I'm too cute to be a vampire. Second, yeah I'll think about it, I have a new bikini I haven't worn yet that makes my breasts look stunning." One of your friends that was sitting by your side put his arm over your shoulder. "I changed my mind, I'm going to this party." He loudly said. The girls in the group didn't laugh at all. "Shut up, Mike." You playfully pushed him. ________________________________________________________________

This was the second night that Jimin was looking for the cat, Sushi. It was not difficult to find out the address of it’s owner, since he had to activate an ambulance for her, and with that he started looking for the animal in her neighborhood. Passing through the empty streets at night after his work shift, he could see the girl's tracks leaving "missing" posters with a picture of a kitten wearing a pink bow tie, on lampposts and bus stops. At first Jimin thought it was going to be easy, with his keen vampire senses, but all he found were stray cats that weren't Sushi. The second night of searching was already ending, the sun was rising, threatening to make him explode into ashes if he didn't come home soon, and no clue as to where to look the next night he had.

Before getting into the car and driving home, Jimin took one last look at the slightly open curtains in the girl's room, Ana, just to make sure she was okay. She had been discharged from the hospital that afternoon and was now sleeping on the couch, probably medicated. Jimin didn't want to leave her alone, but he couldn't just walk into her apartment and offer help, for now all he could do was find a way to find the cat. ________________________________________________________________ Jimin lives in an old pretty house in the wealthiest part of the city, it isn't a mansion, but it is big and expensive enough to impress anyone who sees it, privileges of centuries of saved money. It's a cliché, but vampires dress in designer clothes, ride luxury cars and live in expensive mansions, houses, apartments, and Jimin is no exception.

From one of the main rooms, behind a heavy curtain, hidden in the gloom, was another vampire, watching the street with intent, expressionless eyes. When Jimin's car turned the corner and up the wide street lined with huge trees, the vampire got uneasy, his beautiful restless hands worrying the hem of his sleeves. He was anxious and angry, if his heart was still beating it would be racing. The garage door opened and the car entered, disappearing from view, in the next second the vampire was no longer in the room but in front of the door leading to the garage, waiting in the empty, dark hall. The knob turned the door slightly opened, Jimin with his head down did not seem to notice the presence of the other before being attacked.

"AH!" Jimin screamed as long arms embraced his neck. If it wasn't for the wall behind him he would have fallen, yet he had no escape, with a body much larger than his overpowering him. "Taehyungie!"

"You are late! Is the second day in a row you get home after sunrise! Are you trying to die?" Taehyung said, and didn't let Jimin go just yet. "It's okay. I was careful, I just had to do a few things before I came home. Look, there's not even smoke coming out of me." Jimin ran his hands over Tae's back, making him relax. The other stepped back a little, taking his face in his big hands.

"You could have sent a message. I asked you to let me know if you were going to be late again, Jiminie..." Tae pouted, still distressed. "And why do your clothes smell like garbage? Take it off."

Even feeling deprived of affection, Taehyung walked away looking disgusted, covering his nose with two fingers. Jimin obeyed, taking off his sneakers, jacket and jeans, following Taehyung through the corridor to the laundry room, where he put everything in a basket to wash later, and also exchanged the shirt for a clean one too. "I went into some alleys today, looking for a cat. That's why." Jimin explained, feeling much more comfortable in not smelling bad.

"And where's it? I don't think Tannie will like to share the house with a cat..." "Where is what?" Jimin was confused. Tae crossed his arms.

"The cat?"

"Oh no!" Jimin laughed, reaching for Tae to take him by the shoulders. "I wasn't looking for a cat to bring home, as much as I would love one as a pet... It's the cat of a girl I met, and is very sad to have lost it..."

"I got it..." Taehyung mumbled.

Jimin was just helping someone. Again. And Taehyung couldn't say exactly why it bothers him so much every time, but it does, he feels distressed, almost as if the world around him collapsed, and it makes him think he's being overdramatic. Live an eternity when you can't even put your feelings out in moments of frustration. Damn, it is conflicting... If vampires could cry, he would. But never that he would let Jimin discover that he feels that way.

It was Jimin's turn to take Tae's face in his little hands.

"You are so skinny. When was the last time you fed?" Taehyung didn't answer.

"You don't even remember, right?" Jimin's eyes went worried. "Did you see that I brought some O- packs for you? I left it in the fridge."

"No, I didn't." A shy smile spread across Tae's face. O- is his favorite blood type, but because it is a not so common type, and humans need transplantation, it's not always that Jimin brings it to him, usually opting for his second favorite flavor or other one available.

Jimin has been trying to cheer his friend up with little treats. It has been a difficult phase, in which he thinks Tae is going through the vampiric midlife crisis. He hasn't been out of the house for almost two decades and does nothing without a little external motivation, even the simplest things like eating. So Jimin tries to bring the best blood types to fill the fridge, signed all available streaming platforms, updates Taehyung's video game consoles as soon as a new model comes out, tries to get him interested in new hobbies - which never works but he doesn't give up - and he even adopted a puppy so that Tae would never be alone.

"Come." Jimin pulled him by the hand to their modern practically untouched kitchen, opened the fridge and picked two packs of blood, the dark liquid shining at the cold light. “In my room or yours?"

"Yours."

The two of them got to Jimin's room, followed by the sound of four paws scraping the polished wooden floor, Yeontan chasing them closely. Jimin pulled the covers off the clean bed, on which he rarely lies down, so they could get more comfortable. Tae laid on his back, against the pile of smooth pillows, carefully opening a packet of blood to not spill a single drop, and put a stainless steel straw in the opening. Jimin turned on the TV, put the dog in the bed, and cuddled Tae's side, with his head on his chest.

"What show have you been watching?" Jimin asked.

"None. I've been looking for something interesting in this shit for days and I can't find anything." Tae took a sip of his blood with a pout.

Jimin chuckled. "I'm choosing then."

A moment of silence followed, in which the only sound was of Tae drinking the rest of his first pack, and then opening another one.

"I think I need to shower..." Jimin commented.

Taehyung's arm that was around Jimin tightened. "Not now. Later." Jimin laughed, thinking it was cute. An idea crossed his mind, another small treat.

"Do you want to bath with me instead?" He looked up to Tae.

Tae hold tightened even more.

"Not now. Later. Now we cuddle."

As if agreeing, Yeontan climbed over the two vampires, finding a comfortable place to lie down and join the cuddle pile.

"Ok."

________________________________________________________________

Tonight you didn't have time to talk to Jimin when you arrived at work, he was on a call, and it seemed really serious. You didn't have the money to buy extra coffee even for yourself, so you hadn't an excuse to pass quietly by his desk to leave a post-it written "Hi :)". In those circumstances, you went straight to your desk to work, to do your best to be a good listener.

To your surprise, making your heart melt and your breath hold at the bottom of the throat, you saw at the top of your computer screen a post-it with a "Hi, sweetheart." written on it, and another one with a "Look in the fridge.". After working with him for that time, regularly doing some paperwork like filling out documentation and such things, you could say for sure that this was Jimin's handwriting, besides, only he calls you sweetheart.

You checked the clock on the wall with an eager look and a silly smile. As you always arrive ten minutes early, there was time to go to the break room quickly, and look inside the fridge before starting to work. And so you did. The break room was nothing more than a small table with a few chairs, a small couch, a sink, an old coffee machine, a microwave and the refrigerator, all in a tight space lit by white lights that leave the place a little impersonal. None of your co-workers were there, as usual. You crossed the small room to the fridge and opened it trying not to make a noise, more out of habit than necessity.

The interior was very empty, with some forgotten lunchboxes, but that didn't interest you. Your goal was right in the middle. A big cup of iced coffee, from a franchise that you don't usually buy from because you find it a little too expensive for your student budget, with your name written on a post-it on top of it.

"Y/N, I wanted to be me treating you today. Hope you like it."

That coffee was as cold as Jimin's fingertips when touching yours, but it warmed your heart. Sometimes you question yourself if it's healthy how head over heels you are for this guy, for so little.

Back at your desk, now with your iced coffee, you wrote a post-it and pasted it on the back of your computer screen, where Jimin could see it. "Thanks :)" Then you started to work. Other people needed you now. ________________________________________________________________ On your fifteen minutes break time, you were leaving the restroom, passing a moisturizing hand cream - because you swear that the soap in this place dries out your skin, and god forbid you from harsh hands -, the sound of the break room's door opening made you lift your eyes from the floor. It was Jimin. He don't take breaks, it's not like he needs it, he doesn't get tired, but he didn't get the chance to talk to you today yet, so as soon he saw you stretching in your chair, indicating that you would soon get up to go to the bathroom - yes, he learned your routine and mannerisms - he discreetly left the room to meet you by coincidence in the hall afterwards.

"Hi, Y/N. Did you like the coffee?" He charmly smiled at you, he was eager to ask it to you, to find out if he made the right choice of flavor, or if he made a bad mistake and you hated it - he couldn't help thinking about that possibility. Anyway, he was looking forward to your approval.

The truth is that you were so stunned by his caring that it didn't matter what the flavor was.

"Actually, yes. I love vanilla flavored things. It's basic but it makes me happy." You fixed your hair, pulling it behind your ears. Jimin could tell by your smile and your heated face that you aren't lying.

"Nice. I wanted to make you happy." He approached you, more than is suitable for the work environment, and it made you nervous, and of course he noticed. But it was okay, if someone came close he would hear and walk away before they could see you, too bad he couldn't tell you that.

"Mission completed successfully." You said, without looking away from his eyes - no matter how much part of you shouted at you to do it, your heart felt like it was going to explode. Well, your heart has a limit, so you changed the subject. "Did your friend find her cat?" Sadness took over Jimin's eyes.

"Unfortunately not. I've been looking for him for two days and nothing, I swear I think I've looked in every street, alley and trash can. I don't want to think like that, but I think Sushi is no longer with us." He sighed, clearly frustrated. You had the impulse to rub his forearms to comfort him, it was the very first time you really touched him. "If he is a cat that wasn't accustomed to getting out, and didn't know how to walk on the street, it is possible that something bad happened... But! He's a cat, if he used to go out often, he might have some other house, other owners, and that's why he hasn't come back yet." You optimistically said.

A smile spread in Jimin's face.

"That makes sense! She told me something like 'He's never been away from home for so long', there's hope then. And you also gave me an idea. Thank you, Y/N." He pulled you into a hug, and you thought you could die.

"You welcome." You said against his chest, deciding not to waste the opportunity to return the hug. ________________________________________________________________ The day was perfect for a vampire walk in the daytime. Cloudy and rainy. No deadly sunbeams and an excuse to use an umbrella without calling attention to it. After the tip you gave, Jimin looked in the right place after accompanying you home that night, and in less than an hour he was outside the window of two children's rooms, in a ground floor apartment, looking inside, and sleeping between the feet of one of the children was the cat, he wasn't with his bow tie but there was no mistake, Jimin was sure. Even without being able to enter - vampiric rules, you only can get in somebody's house if invited, or else you explode as if you were under sunlight - Jimin could smell cat all over the house, and the windows all had anti-escape screens, which indicated that it was a family of cat people.

Jimin would need to come back to pick the cat during the day, knock on the front door and politely ask. That's why heavy weather is perfect. With a dark couture coat, covering all from his neck to the back of his hands, to his knees, a design hat and sunglasses, and last but nos least, a big umbrella, he approached the lower middle class apartment complex. Without hesitation he raised his hand and knocked. Some seconds passed by, sound of kids running inside and a voice of a famale scolding them muffled by the closed door, and then a little girl, maybe six-year-old, appeared in Jimin's field of vision, her eyes sparkling as she looked at him. He was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen after all.

"Hello." Jimin smiled. "Are your parents home?"

She smiled at him, but shook her head negatively.

"Jo, who is it?" An older girl opened the door wider and faced Jimin with a frown that fell apart when she saw his smile. Great, a teenager, he thought. "What do you want?"

"Sorry to bother, I really wanted to talk to an adult, but..." Jimin lifted his phone, the screen showing Sushi's missed post. "I saw my friend's cat on your window."

The older girl narrowed her eyes as she looked at the photo, but before she could answer, the little girl she called Jo before ran away.

"No!" She screamed, disappearing inside the apartment, and then slamming a door somewhere.

"Sorry for that, please wait a minute." The teenager closed the door on his face, and he could hear her shouting and scolding the girl little inside. He was starting to lose his patience. Jimin doesn't like to be ignored at all. Should he knock again and use his mind control powers to get the cat? He was pondering the idea when the door opened again, the two girls were still loudly arguing inside, and this time it was a small boy who must be the middle sibling in front of him.

"Hi, grandma said to tell you to come in." He mumbled.

"So you are letting me get in your house?" Jimin asked with a satisfied grin.

"Yeah... follow me." The boy was avoiding eye contact, being shy. Jimin thought he was adorable.

Jimin followed the boy to a tiny living room, where an old woman was sitting in front of the TV. The girls were now silent, but clearly wanting to argue some more, and the small one was with Sushi in her arms. Jimin sighed, he likes children, a lot, even though he doesn't live with many, but he likes them even more when they're not having a tantrum.

"Hello. Please, take a seat." The old lady pointed to the old couch. The vampire obliged, and almost immediately a fat orange cat jumped into his lap. In this small room alone he could see three more of them. "So, why do you want to steal one of my babies?" Steal? Jimin was slightly offended, he already explained himself, but the chaotic situation created a misunderstanding. "I'm not here to steal nothing, ma'am." He showed his cellphone again. "One of your cats is Sushi, my friend's cat."

"That's not his name!" The little girl shouted tapping a foot on the floor in anger. Jimin just raised his eyebrows at her, making her swallow hard. But he is in control of the situation, so Jimin smiled to remain pleasant.

"Of course it is. Just watch, little one." He reached out to call the cat. "Come here, Sushi." Even though the cat didn't know Jimin to trust him - and these people don't need to know that - cats are creatures of the night, strongly attached to magic and protection in the dark hours, and in the hierarchy of the night they obeyed vampires. The only things that cats respect more than vampires are witches and their own owners whom they protect. As Jimin expected, Sushi jumped off the girl's tight hold and went over to him.

"Good boy. Ana is missing you like hell." Jimin scratched behind his ears. Before someone else could say anything, he proceeded. "When he got lost he was using a pink bow tie." The old lady was still with Jimin cellphone in her hand, and he could see she was convinced he know the cat, but wasn't intending on letting him leave with him yet.

"I'm seeing it in the post, but there was no tie when we got him." She replied. "You just didn't see it, ma'am." Jimin was tired of this conversation, it was being a lot less nice than he imagined on his way there. When he looked to the little girl to talk to her, his eyes were intense and powerful, and his voice was full of authority. "Go get the tie where you hid it, little one."

Mesmerized by Jimin's power, the girl didn't even blink or say anything as she obeyed, turned around and ran to one of the rooms. Jimin doesn't use hypnosis very often but he has fun every time. She got back with it and handed it to him.

"Thanks." He removed the effect and the little girl blinked a few times before understanding what happened.

The old lady was clearly angry with the girl, but it wasn't Jimin's business. "Well I think that's all. We are going now." Jimin got up from the couch.

"Wait!" The teenager snapped. "Jo lied about the bow to keep the cat, and that's bad, but she already loves him! You can't just take him away!"

Jimin was almost on the door.

"Of course I can. Besides, it's not because what she did is bad, young lady. It's because my friend loves him, actually this cat is Ana's family. No one should live alone, right?"

"Right!" The old lady got up too. "I'll get you to the door, tell our friend we are sorry."

"I will. Thank you." ________________________________________________________________

"You found the cat!" Tae sniffed the back of Jimin's neck. "Where is it?"

Jimin was putting the clothes he was using to wash, to remove the smell of cat and the places he passed by. And to get comfortable, as is his habit when he gets home, he just stayed in his underwear and t-shirt.

"I already gave him back to his owner." In the next second Jimin was dropping himself on the leather couch.

"And how was it? Did she thank you with tears in her eyes?" Tae leaned over the back of the sofa with his chin in his hands.

Jimin chuckled, Taehyung's thirst for drama is funny, and he's always been like that. And at least that doesn't seem to have changed...

"Well... She cried a lot when she found him in the window. She looked really happy!" Jimin sang. He was really happy too. He helped someone to find their smile again, even if it is a little bit, it made him really proud of himself, a warm feeling in his chest telling him it was the right thing to do, and that he should do it again if he gets the opportunity. Taehyung's expression changed, suddenly he was disinterested.

"You didn't even talk to her? Just left the cat there for her to find?"

"Well, yeah." Jimin threw his hair back. "I couldn't risk she recognizing my voice and thinking I was stalking her. Scaring her was not the goal, Tae, quite the contrary..."

Taehyung stared at him in silence for what felt a whole minute - maybe it really was, vampires perceive time differently. "You are not a secret superhero, Jimin. You are a vampire." Said that he got back to his room.

Jimin doesn't understand. These outbursts and mood swings leave him confused. And it's not like he hasn't already tried to talk. This... This he doesn't recognize in Taehyung. It hurt his feelings and at same time he feels it is partially his faut. "I can be both if I want to!" He exclaimed.

No answer. To find somebody who would be happy for him and understand the euphoria he felt for saving a little bit that girl he went through his contact list. A lot of vampire names - a lot is maybe an exaggeration, since he doesn't have many friends at all - who wouldn't be rude, but wouldn't understand, and also some former human colleagues from past jobs with whom he hasn't spoken in a long time and maybe should erase the number... And you. Of course you are the obvious choice. You had sympathy for the case from the beginning, even offered to help. And if it weren't for you he wouldn't have succeeded...

Jimin: hey sweetheart Jimin: I found sushi! Jimin: thanks to you btw He sent the messages, hoping it wouldn't be strange. It wasn't the first time you two texted before, but it was just an exchange of memes and silly flirt... without compromise talk. And what he wanted this time was different. You took too long to answer, and he wondered if you were in class and if he was bothering you. He wanted everything but to mess it up with you right now. Maybe he should've checked your class schedule for the week to make sure he texted you when he was sure you were free. But he was so eager to talk to someone... with you. He gave up waiting and went after doing something productive. Crochet dolls. He was doing a mini Taehyung, with red eyes and little cute fangs - an apology for later, neither of them like fighting with each other, even if you can't call that earlier thing a fight- when his cell phone started to crazily vibrate and beep.

You: OMG! You: thts amazing! You: sorry i didn't aswr before You: I was taking a nap hehe You: anyways You: i'm so happy u found him You: [image.jpg] You: ur friend must be even happier :) You: what do u mean thanx to me? You: sorry i spammed u :( Jimin can't handle you. You are too cute. You literally sent him a photo of you with an enormous smile, cheering, to show him your reaction. And you were with your hair all messed and the puffy face of someone who just woke up. Precious. Jimin: no problem, sweetheart Jimin: you said to look in other owners' houses. basically. I found him with a old cat lady with three grandchildren   Jimin: you are looking cute btw You: OwO You: i'm looking like shit Jimin You: BUT thats awesome You: if it was me id be crying til my eyes fall You weren't even there with him, in person, and you were putting a smile on his face. How dare you say you look like shit when you have those perfect cute cheeks? So alive...

Jimin: EXACTLY. that's why I wanted to find him so much. Jimin: and because you helped me, I want to reward you Jimin: i know you don't work today. me neither. do you want to go out for coffee in a nice place? You took too long to answer again, and that's because your heart is exploding and knees trembling while you stare at your cell phone screen, standing midway in your kitchen. You: u dont need to. i did nothing. This time Jimin took too long to answer. He was making a decision. To be more straightforward. More honest. Until now he was dictating a slow pace for your flirting, because for him romance is like that. But what if he tries to speed things up a bit? Or if he lets you command? How would things be?

Jimin: Y/N, respect my excuse to ask you out.

He knew what your answer would be. Even so, he felt anxious, hearing a non-existent heartbeat in his ear, while the three dots indicated that you were typing.

You: ok. what time do you come to pick me?

Tag List:  @angrygardenerr @depressed-dude20 @milktaetae95 @tangledsparkles  @wlalsrkfla @minikolima​  @wrecklesseuphoria

If you want me to add you to the list let me know, and please let comments :)

[bcanetwork]

BCA NFTalk Vol.3｜Art Blocks NFTs’ Imagination

Guest Speakers：Host ArthurLou BCA Co-Founder丨Vulcan DAO GP（简称A）

Zero Chen NFT Consultant of FTChinese.com（简称C）

Ting Song AI and Blockchain Artist丨IOAC Asia Ambassador（简称S）

Hesiod 「Theogo NFT Observer」Chief Editor （简称H）

Nico Yang VulcanDAO GP（简称Y）

Background: It's been a few months of a mini-bull market for NFT collectibles, which the frenzied sales of CryptoPunks have pushed up in recent days. In addition, Art Blocks, as a generative art segment, topped the 7-day trading volume list strongly, ranking first with The Art Blocks segment was ranked fifth overall with $498 million. These three segments - avatars, generative art, and solo editions - make up a solid JPEG Summer. In this context, we invite four guests to chat about the NFT imagination beyond Punk.

01

Host A: What do you think of the macro reasons for this 2021 Summer rampage? Share some of the recent Punk-like replica disc projects and NFT collecting tips that you've been following.

C: It's not very surprising that Punk is on fire; its holders or investors/collectors who are bullish think it should be higher priced. Its broken circle has become more apparent, and this mini-bull market is a spurt of an accumulation from the entire NFT market that preceded it. Social subcultures and aesthetic psychology drive NFT and trendy fashion, so its rise and fall may be very different from how technology has evolved and popularised. Compared to traditional art and traditional collecting, this wave in the crypto world should be just beginning. If CryptoPunks do become digital antiques, I believe they will be worth much more than that in the future.

Y: Until 2021, it will be difficult for digital content creators to get their work recognized by the market and to cash in without relying on big institutions with a centralized approach. The breaking of the circle in media and the entrance of money brought by the wealth creation effect have greatly refreshed the perception of digital content. Echoing what Che Guevara once said, "After we leave, they build you schools and hospitals, not because they have shown great mercy, but because we came."

The identity that comes with NFT is only really felt when it is held. The purpose is different, and the logic of buying and collecting can be very different. A scarce NFT is a status symbol in itself.

S: Compared to the art market, which is repeatedly tested and scrutinized by connoisseurs from different perspectives, there is a sizeable speculative bubble in the English-speaking community on Ethereum. A lot of this bubble is in cultural content and projects that lack culture can be short-lived. The works that I want to keep inside my wallet for a long time are the ones that I will be happy to look at even ten years from now.

In this JPEG Summer, I strongly feel that it is similar to 1CO at the end of 17, where all aspects of blockchain project parties were active, but the market turned cold after 18 years. A successful crypto art series is also a successful cultural product that combines technology and art.

Punk is Punk in the same way that an asteroid hitting the earth is hard to replicate, and special times happen like this. How do you ambush the next Punk? 1. Is there innovation? 2. Is the seed community very geeky? 3. Is it a historical level under the megatrend? 4. Can the team continue to do it? 5. are the institutional holders coming in at the middle stage good enough to drive the project forward? 6. can it create a cultural resonance in the circle? These are all worth exploring.

Regarding collection investment strategies, I am very much focused on niche artists from developing countries, especially those with a pure art background or a very pioneering sense of creativity in the contemporary art field and those who respect the blockchain spirit of the blockchain community.

Moderator A: Each Trader (trader) has a different investment strategy, and each person has limited energy to focus on one vertical track. Suppose one is easily influenced by the market and forcibly changes his investment strategy. In that case, it is scary for a Trader, which is equivalent to the whole cognitive system having to be reconstructed.

H: The cost of a physical painting is not high, but it can be sold for hundreds of millions. Therefore, the value of a work does not lie in its materials or cost. Its physical price does not determine the value of Jpeg. In the structure of the blockchain market, Crypto Punks, Art Blocks, and BAYC represent the three dimensions that can be found in the NFT market. Crypto Punks starts from a programmer and is driven by technology; the monkey BAYC is community-driven. The blockchain community may be The base for the survival of the future blockchain; Art Blocks enter from artistic creativity.

From the perspective of social governance, Token is an institutional symbol. Mature NFT projects must create a field and a way of existence, and a variety of hobbies professional life corresponds to the current needs of various communities. I don't see it as a speculative target but rather as a script for building a kind of Metaverse called the respective Metaverse, whose development depends on the evolution of the community.

02

Moderator A: The more successful 10K projects have a cultural tribe behind them, and the ethos can be very different from project to project. How do you see Art Blocks as a clear stream with awe-inspiring numbers? How do you see it breaking out and the appreciation and valuation insights into generative art as a discipline?

S: The group of projects in NFT that are particularly speculative and not culturally good enough are like passing clouds and won't be in the prosperous state they are today when the market is in a bad mood. But two things are sure to go a long way: firstly, good cultural content is never speculative. But anything that has an innovative aesthetic or interest that strikes a chord is not entirely speculative and has its own commercial identity quite typically. The second point, the trend towards avatars and social identities, is unstoppable.

I am very bullish on generative art. Behind it is a respect and exploration of the mathematical logic behind information technology. The methods used are engineering in nature and reflect the cultural identity of a group of people.

C: Generative art started with computer technology and continued until this wave of artificial intelligence, more precisely the application of convolutional neural networks, entered the aesthetic vision of the masses, with a low correlation to the market price of generative artworks. In the past, the general aesthetics of popular art did not break through the traditional class texture (strong mediated aesthetic vision), the blockchain market changed this law, and the same thing is now entering the NFT art collectibles market.

H: NFT is a fuse to the art market, not a monopoly on art history. When the financial operation goes to an extreme, it is decoupled from the actual value creator. Although Art Blocks has a centralized organizer, it is isomorphic with the state-of-the-art community. Generative art will present different visual effects depending on the materials used. With the rapid development of technology and speculation, it is possible to join the first-line NFT.

Y: Art Blocks is the same thing as the explosion of CryptoPunks. Looking at the top 20 Crypto Punks holdings, the most intuitive data is that there is a very high degree of overlap with the big Art Blocks accounts, with the smallest of these holdings holding more than 50 Art Block NFTs.

More generally, a large percentage of the first blockchain explorers to make a large fortune were programmers. The culture that Art Blocks carries is precisely an aesthetically pleasing phenomenon from a programmer's perspective.

Any art form first evolved from technology, and the value of NFT relies on the programmer-led blockchain revolution to provide sufficient wealth to support it. Crypto Punks represent a new class of people, the last piece of the puzzle in internet development.

03

A: The bigger the wave, the further back you look; what should be the kind of work that can be called classic or digital antiques? What is the view on the future of NFT?

C: If we look at this from a long-term perspective, three points need to be considered. Firstly, there is a characteristic of any cultural investment product that performs more similarly to financial assets in a bull market and can be less liquid than financial assets in a bear market, with a liquidity black hole. Classic core assets can find counterparties no matter when they are traded. Broad consensus and acceptance are the hallmarks of traditional investments, and a sense of scarcity and value is formed over a long period.

Secondly, whether crypto art or generative art, continuing to move forward requires special attention to fit in with other cultural and sub-cultural trends, the spirit of the times.

Thirdly, the artist is a profession, not an inoffensive one. One might as well consider the NFT market giving artists such opportunities as a form of nourishment. If it does not produce investment returns, it is still making its contribution to the art market.

H: I encourage artists to get involved in art that may not be very romantic because there is a massive demand for essential art waiting there. A good NFT project is hardly successful without the creation of artists, and NFT offers a vast blue ocean for artists. Calmness is always within one's heart, maintaining a sense of rationality in the course of a bear or bull market, no matter how noisy it may be.

Host's summary: Since I entered this track myself, there are still times of anxiety and confusion, but things are still in the making. I hope that I can do something genuinely long-term like the four excellent teachers.

[tarathorntonstan]

🌹

i had dipped back into this VERY old wip recently.....yes it is pacrim and no it does not take uprising into consideration bc i did not see it (no disrespect to my husband but i never will :/ )

just thinkin about how family at the end of the world gets found. then lost. then found again.

thank you for the excuse to yell about these beautiful people again💕💕💕💕

in response to this post🌹 (x)

Stacker can feel the anger in the tears that soak his shirt. When she says no, she tried counting, deep breathing—all of the exercises they both know Dr. Hayworth has asked her to do—he wonders out loud why they do not soothe her in the usual way, especially when she has done them before?

“I need you to protect me.”

He stays with Mako the rest of the night. They look at the map of the stars over the Pacific Ocean that Stacker brought her when she still lived in the orphanage.

Stacker Pentecost has dog-ears the pages in at least four books on the subject of adoption. He hired a lawyer, a friend of the Jessops outside of the PPDC’s legal team, to better investigate laws—South Korea and other countries postponed legislation banning foreign adoption after Trespasser, but there are still hurdles for Western families looking to adopt internationally.

There is a folder on Stacker’s private tablet with articles from different academic journals, bookmarks on his browser from parenting blogs, op-eds about raising children from Asia without naming any specific country or even region. A monthly podcast from The Guardian is utterly useless, mostly concerned with “keeping a healthy balance between East and West.” A Buzzfed roundup of useful infographics on the subject links to several organizations who are working to provide for this new influx of lost or abandoned children in strike zone countries. Donation and volunteer options with very little practical information.

The blogs and feature articles show happy couples. Some have biological children, but here is what he finds in each should-be stock photo: Straight white teeth, conventional trousers and soft pastel cotton shirts, clipped suburban landscapes and Southern Living interior designs. European mutts for fathers, mothers claiming Iriquois origins. 

They found their Arnold or Hannah-Grace in Beijing or Bombay, Lima or Seoul. (In some cases, the child’s ancestral names were too difficult to pronounce and adoptive parents wanted their new family not to feel so “apart” from the landlocked home they’ve been taken to.) Some have other biological children, but assure the relevant news sources that this love has not diminished for the child they saved. They are eager to share humanizing stories about failed IVF and infertility, but more often than not, it is simply their noble character that put them on the path to help these children, these orphans forgotten at the end of the world, these kaiju orphans.

(The term  is first penned by a since-sacked news pundit that makes waves across social media and unfortunately becomes common nomenclature for a world experiencing true chaos for the first time). 

Stacker feels sick when he reads these articles, remembering the orphanage. They had been able to keep the cameras out of the orphanage, but the tight-lipped women who still spoke in a quiet voice over the chatter and shouting of children did little to hide their disapproval. He had tried to remain discreet, but even out of his PPDC dress blues, he was easy to spot in Tokyo. 

During those days, Stacker moved back and forth between Anchorage, Tokyo, and Honolulu with frequency.

After frustrating months of language lessons, the orphanage allowed him to see the girl—not as small as she was on that day in 2016—again, the one who had screamed when they tried to pry her from his arms for decontamination. She was more subdued, the women said, months after Onibaba attacked, and no longer jumping at the sounds of loud banging. 

It was very difficult for her to speak, they said.

The girl was visibly shocked when she was brought into a smaller playroom with Stacker, but she still said nothing, only bowing in greeting, and turning to her caretaker, her brown eyes easily conveying the questions that burned in her throat.

Stacker remembers the press conference—the first of many—after leaving the orphanage for the last time. The disapproving stares of his superiors slicing razor-sharp through his skin, as he dodged questions concerning the girl who was sleeping soundly on a cot in his private quarters in the Shatterdome. It took Representative Taylor’s harsh voice to steer the conversation away from the decommissioned Ranger’s personal life, and after that barrage of questioning, he was more than pleased to explain the prudence of deploying a new team under Coyote Tango. 

But the voice of a notorious tabloid reporter stays in the forefront of Stacker’s mind as he lies in bed that night, listening to Mako’s steady breathing.

Now that you’ve saved Tokyo’s Daughter yet again, what are you planning to do now?

[spnsmile]

[Hello! I understand this can be upsetting to some so tags are on: RPF, ENGINE FAILURE, ANGST, EMOTIONALLY HURT/ COMFORT/ FLUFF] work of fiction BUT FLUFF/ KISSES

Response to @cocklesdestielfiction​ prompt BOTTLE (Cockles, a 5K story)

“The right engine exploded… like… BOOM!”

— Richard Speight Jr. (VegasCon 2020)

********

“Where’s Misha?”  says Jensen above the steady hum of the plane’s engine blending with sounds of shuffling bags, pitter-patters, and clinking glasses but Misha can always hear him perfect pitch or not.

“Here.” he heaved himself from the end of the aisle after unloading his personal bag with the other smaller luggage. He can hear Cliff talking to the attendant by the coach but he’s just too tired to say hello. 

“Hey, Cliff.” 

Misha’s eyebrows rake up and unfortunately for him that’s all he can muster with his limp. There’s a blunt grunt from the security papa bear.

“Nappy time for you, Misha. You look shit.”

“Thanks.” he grimaces. After ten hours on set (and that’s without Jared), he’s just too exhausted. Stalking to the cabin seats, Misha joined the others with bleary eyes.

He catches glinting green whose cherry lips begin to form into a wild smile. There has to be some rule about instant rejuvenation just from receiving that dose from such a nice face.

Richard beats them both in whatever shit they were about to say.

“Service is slowing, Misha. Your customer’s been addressing his complaints to the not-so-proper authorities.”Misha sniggers.

 “Who’s proper here, do tell.”

“Jensen’s not being proper at adulting.” Alex supplies staring out at the green primo uomo Misha’s been ignoring. The whine comes. It’s like a sweet tickle on his ears. Petulant and cheeky growly voice—signs Misha learned—since his first day—never to encourage.

“Misha! Mish! One more call you’re gonna deliver a bar.” 

He turns.

“Been callin you out.” 

“You do that to spite me, fucker.” Misha drawls, walking to Jensen and holding out another bottled water that has to be his 8th. “Here. Don’t believe the media when they tell you the world will never run out of water. Maison says the water sprites will invoke the right to strike just on principle.”

“Sweet faerie. But I believe you. You just hoarded eight hundred Aquafina.” 

“And who’s fault is that?”

If Jensen wasn’t giggling so dorkily at him, he would have snatched the bottle and cursed him for the reminder. But Misha couldn’t help the smile tugging at the corner of lips. Even Rich and Alex hark laughter at the meaning.

Cause Misha Collins just had a truck of bottled water delivered on set that’s still causing stomach hurts from the cast. Recently, Jensen had taken up the habit of ‘mentioning Misha ’on set as a result of that one interview involving some intense heart eyes and delivery of drinks caught on camera. Nothing to deny there, relationships over ten years tend to turn if not bitter-sweet memories, then the opposite tooth-rotting.

This takes the cake. Everyone began doing the same.

Of course, Misha— pleased by the attention and a new game to distract himself from the already distracting Jensen, returned all summons. Misha who was never one to do things halfway and pledged on delivering all sorts of drinks every Jensen pings his name—except apple juice, jesus. 

But it’s one of those feats that usually get out of control in Supernatural so by the end of the first week, everyone’s just going ‘Misha.’ He liked that a lot. Also, like the truckload of bottled water delivered on set much to their amusement.

When Vicky saw the number on their credit card receipt, she didn’t even raise an eyebrow. Oh, but he wanted to tell her anyway.

All fun aside, Misha’s particularly grumpy now for another reason. Sleep-deprived and emotionally drained after pouring everything on that last take, he’s now headed to Vegascon with this little group. It was nice Jared arranged his private plane to take them. The pretty convenient thing when a pandemic is out there.

Jensen looks tired too, dark lines under the eyes, lips dry— thus the water bottle Misha’s been carrying around— but how the fuck he managed to radiate with teenage energy even when it’s already late will forever evade Misha who wants to snuggle beside him but instead just looks him straight in the eyes.

“Fuck you,” he mouths, backing to his empty chair.

“Do it.” Jensen teases him and Misha will not appreciate that radiance of beauty pulling him in.

“Can’t, there’s our kid here. Don’t wanna make it awkward.”

Alex shakes his head. “Nope. I think I’ve seen the worst of it.”

“That’s what you think.” Misha chuckles.

“Buckle up, Mishano, signals on.” Richard turns his back from the window facing Jensen with red-light flashing above their heads. “Let’s save the Cockles once we’re in Vegas, kay guys? Innocent guy trying to avoid diabetes so save the Cockles.”

“Save the Cockles.” Alex fumbles inside his jacket to fix his earphones. 

Misha and Jensen roll eyes at each other and Misha returns to his spot. Jensen is directly on his line of sight so it’s quite easy to check out on him, maybe snap adorable photos and stack it on his 100 terabyte collection he can post someday when he’s 90.

Taking his phone out after securing his belt, he hears the pilot give instructions as the plane begins to move. Soon, he’s immersing himself with replies on tweets and messages on his number using his extra handphone. Zoning out wasn’t difficult, especially when trying to block out the funny feeling of the engine preparing to take off. They’re all used to it by now.

A few minutes later, they all feel the usual sensation of slowing down bodily before the plane thrusts forward— Misha closes his eyes,  hands clasping his chair until they feel the plane level after the accent.  When he opens his eyes, he hears everyone including him take a deep breath. There are exchanges of words but he is already glued to his phone answering messages sleepily. He’s so tired he can sleep forever. His eyes begin to droop and he sighs in content, finally able to rest even for just minutes.

Till there’s a gentle nudge on his leg. 

He ignores it.

Another kick. 

No.

“Mish.” Kick again.

Misha grimaces. Such long reach for bowlegs…

“Misha, I swear—”

“Social distance, Jen?” he opens his eyes, obviously grumpy.

“A truckload of beer from Poland sounds nice, I’d prefer that.” Jensen wags the water bottle with mischievous dimples showing off on the corner of his cheek. Misha frowns and shuts his eyes again. Good god for distractions. Good god for soft manly middlemen with so much energy…

“Mish…”

Ignore him.

“Mish!”

Imagine if Jared’s around…

“Hey, Misha, Poland beer really—”

Misha’s eyes flutter open.

“No, honey, I will not argue with you about Polish ‘Alkohole,’ it’s not even articulated the same.” Misha throws a grumpy look over notorious green-eyed lynx whose chuckling over his misery, “You’re gonna fuck with me again and I’ll have another story in my head I am unable to tell a soul as its rightfully not for children, sorry, Alex.” 

Ball on Alex’ court, he blinks from Jensen to Misha quietly then shakes his head.

“I am legally an adult.” He obviously could hear them from his pods. Misha raises a finger.

“Correction, the show says you’re 3. All fanfiction does.”

“I’m married.” Alex injects in amusement.

“Fanfiction says Misha and I are married.” comes from Rich’s corner. 

At this Misha sits up, preparing his list of things why Misha-will-never-be-married-to-Richard-Speight-Who-Got-a-Rob impromptu—

“I’m married.” Alex retorts but Richard and Misha are bickering over the type of marriage to hear him.

“You both can say whatever the hell you want, Cockles will top.” 

Sometimes Jensen just can’t bridle it. Sending Misha his heart eyes flirtatiously, he stops the argument with a wink. Misha giggles with all tiredness gone, replying to Alex about marriage while Rich says something about Jibcon to Jensen when things begin to go wrong.

Misha did not see it happen. He was busy looking over Jensen, admiring the bravado and confidence about the newly found comfort over their relationship (and their characters) when a loud bang from his right splits the air, followed by crashing sounds of that thing that Misha dreads, one of the worst sounds he never wants to hear in his life.

 But that’s only just the beginning.

The first explosion rocked the plane violently forward, then topples without warning to their right. It throws them off with seatbelts tightening—making them grab around the seats, stomach in their throat as they keep their steady hold. 

Misha looks outside to the cloud of smoke and crashing debris, his mind tuning only to the present and hears himself as well as Jensen and Richard cursing with jesuschrists. Misha doesn’t know. He was never a steadfast believer but for this one, he’s already calling out god. 

The show’s influence is deeper than he thought. He thinks of all the near-death experiences he’s had but it’s nothing compared to this one. For one, he can only look at Jensen and the feeling sinks in the hollowness of his guts.

This is worse, much worse than the drop tower ride or any gyro drop his children always admired him for riding. No. Here the safety belts that kicked in didn't secure anything from the loud crashing sounds that pierced their ears, the shrill sound of the engine roaring like as it beat fragments unto the air leaving maybe nothing of its parts. How many engines are exploding?

Misha doesn’t close his eyes. He tries to deny the possibility that this is where him, Jensen—  Alex, god Alex just got married! He’s so much more ahead of his life— and Rich just might finally find their end. An irony of life where the show that’s keeping their lives together now also on the way to its end. A kind of twist in reality that’s been shown by many, if not more famous names ahead of himself but Misha tries not to think about them. He tries not to think about the same profession that killed them. He can’t afford it, oh god his children…

He realized he didn’t even kiss West goodbye the morning he left. How he left the unkempt dish on the sink in a hurry. How he didn’t check Maison’s daily log of mischief she does while he’s away.

Now he may not return.

He closes his eyes as the plane shudders violently again. Please...

He calls Castiel’s name too, the back of his mind telling him they're dying. A more humorous, sadistic side of himself adding Dean is here, and that angel of Thursday isn’t going to let his husband die.  They shouldn’t. He and Castiel shouldn’t.

But he’s no Castiel. He’s only Misha.

If anyone asked him how he felt when the plane steadies itself as the pilots pull for control, Misha is not sure anyone would believe him. For the briefest second, he feels this tug at the back of his mind telling him it will be alright and the remarkable part is, Misha believed it. Fucking believe the whisper.

That’s when everything settles down.

Misha quickly looks around at Jense, Rich, and Alex. All of them are pale and he knows he doesn’t look any better. He wants to throw up but the uncertainty of the flight kept him guarded, his grip on the armchair not loosening.

“You guys alright?” Jensen’s voice much deeper than Misha remembers barely managed a nod.

Alex is looking at the floor with concentration where laptops, neck pillows, cups, and stuff are all scattered on the ground. Richard looks as if he’s going to throw up the way he’s holding his stomach. Jensen is staring outside the right window while Misha tells himself to breathe.

“Are you alright?” comes Cliff’s low voice from behind Misha sounding obviously shaken too but still steady. Misha didn’t have time to collect himself. Not that he’s stupid, his body just doesn’t get it, but he quickly pulls his phone and begins texting Vicky and the children.

“What the hell happened?” Richard turns his head over the cockpit when the rumbling dies down.

“Right engine exploded.”  Jensen is already unbuckling himself from his chair and casting everyone a look. “You all good? Mish? Cliff?” He doesn’t wait for answers. He shoots off to the cockpit and stops just by the door looking uncertain. 

“Hey, uh… do we have a situation?” Nobody spoke while he was gone so it's easy to hear the response of the pilots ahead.

“We most certainly do. Get in your seat. Put on your seat belt. We’re doing emergency procedures.”

Calm. Collected. Professional. That’s all Misha had to hear. It doesn’t seem like he’s alone. Everyone else breathes in relief as they all watch Jensen amble back to his seat, nodding. 

“Okay, you certainly have my attention, sir.” 

He buckles up and lifts his chin. The look on their faces must’ve triggered Jensen to clap his hands together. “Hey, buckle up! Cliff, sit down. Rich, breathe, kay? It’s gonna be fine. It’s only one engine, guys, c’mon. This thing flies on three! You think Jared had anyone else to listen to about private jet education? We’re gonna be fine.”

Then like heaven-sent, the pilot begins giving them reports of the situation from the paging in a very clear and commanding voice.  He tells them the right engine exploded which requires them to make a trip back to the nearest airport in Vancouver. That’s all he gives and a promise of an update as he wished everybody to stay calm and follow the protocol for emergency procedures.

“Hear that?” Jensen clears his throat, his hands clasping. Misha receives the full impact of the meaningful green eyes. The plane steadies itself with hum in the air. A full minute pass and the airplane did not drop.

“Fuck.”

Misha forces himself to relax as he drops his head back on his chair.  He can’t feel his body. His hands are still trembling when he smacks it on his cold face. “Fuck!” He can’t seem to say anything other than that.

“Fuck, indeed.” Richard agrees, grabbing his phone, “Good thing I got my pods on, that sound coulda destroyed my ears.” he begins typing on his phone immediately. Alex begins a speed typing contest while Misha receives Vicky's reply after his first message.

‘Kids are mine, right?’

‘Because I cannot make them alone. What’s wrong?’- V

Misha goes on about the engine and the exchange of mail becomes rampant. When about twenty minutes pass with a few throws of questions around, Misha looks up when he hears the blubbing sound of whiskey. Jensen is pouring 

“I’m gonna be drinking that scotch when I get back home,” he’s saying as he hands the glasses each to Richard, Alex and finally to Misha who shakes his head, putting the glass on the holder. Jensen takes the armchair beside him to which Misha is glad, especially when Jensen wounds his arm around his shoulder.

“We’re fine, Mish, stop shaking.” Jensen drops the side of his cheeks on Misha’s raven hair.

“I’m not,” Misha says shakily, wrapping his arms around Jensen’s torso and just pulling him into a tight hug. “Fuck!”

Continue reading: AO3

[sawdustandgin]

A Year of Happiness, Joy and Sarcasm: My 2020 in Review

Absolutely nothing needs to be said about the year of our lord 2020 that hasn’t already been shouted from every social media platform like a shrieking alarm alerting us that the ship is sinking. We know. We’re all wet. 

I will not remember 2020 as mask-clad because I didn’t take any photos while wearing one. 

Every December, I reflect on the year through a short essay, allowing myself many opportunities to gush about the music that I didn’t include on my best-of lists but that I still loved dearly. (Though I guess I skipped last year. I found an abandoned draft the other day…) And consistently, I have regarded each year as one of transition. 

I don’t have clear career aspirations outside of wanting to engage with music as deeply and personally as I can; my only concrete life plan is to profile small towns across the country through the lens of its local music scene. So, with this nebulous image of a future endeavor, I have had a tumultuous time with money since losing my job two years ago. I realized fairly quickly, after only a few months of foundering at it, that I was unable to freelance my way to a liveable income. And in all honesty, this was for the best—nothing hurts worse than realizing the activity you are most passionate about has become a chore. I stopped worrying about pitching editors and trying to rub elbows, and I got to work applying for jobs. I, incredibly luckily, secured one after a few more months. The adjustment to being unemployed was a leap for me and my deep desire for a routine, but the adjustment to being employed and trying to maintain a balance between day job and side gig was even harder. 

Then I loosened up a bit. Toward the end of last year, I tried to make a vow to be more consistent with the blog, but instead, I prioritized sleep. At the time, I didn’t realize that it was an either/or scenario and probably would have made a greater effort to avoid my television if I had. But ultimately, I had to accept that my relationship with music journalism was on my terms. And regardless of how [in]frequently I ‘discovered’ new artists (for myself), I wasn’t ‘missing out’ on anything. 

And let’s be real, I wasn’t overly eager to listen to new stuff starting around April. I put so much energy into not losing myself in quarantine that I tuckered myself out before shit really hit the ceiling. When I began thinking toward my year-end lists in November, I began to worry that this would be my most deflated best-of season in recent memory. 

That’s ok, Zoë, no one really cares about top ten lists, I can hear you thinking, colored by a fascination with my determination. But as a double cancer and pisces moon, I like to cling to the art that moves my soul (read: ~nostalgia~). And so I take great joy in spending all of December and most of January repeatedly listening to my favorite music until I conjure a partially arbitrary ranking system and create playlists galore. It really is the best time of the year. 

Of course, there are always a few titles that need no additional spins, whether due to automatic disqualification or simply because I listened so much that I know it intimately. The automatic disqualifications this year were particularly striking. 

A few easy omissions were Chromatica, Positions, and Fetch the Bolt Cutters. Lady Gaga delivered her skip-less album around the time when it became clear that the pandemic was not even somewhat close to containment; my roommate and I cooked to Chromatica every night, singing along to every word. With each new record, Ariana Grande becomes a more graceful songwriter, and it also helps that Positions is a plain ol', boot-knockin’ good time. And the raw power Fiona Apple wields in Fetch the Bolt Cutters would be frightening were she not the perfect vessel to deliver it to us. 

Then there is the category of albums that simply didn’t need my (albeit dim) spotlight: Set My Heart on Fire Immediately, græ, and KicK i are each masterpieces in their own right. They each move purposefully through diverse landscapes, each song a new adventure not bound by genre or expectation. Interestingly, Perfume Genius and Moses Sumney were never mainstays in my music rotation, while my love for Arca is unquestioned. 

That leads us to Re-Animator, I’m Your Empress Of and The Mosaic of Transformation, all of which I actively feel bad for disqualifying. I’m too much of a fan of Everything Everything to impartially write about their new album, though it was one of my most frequently played. I have been writing best-of lists for six years now and I would prefer to write about a constantly expanding, diverse group of artists. That means I can’t keep doting on Empress Of, despite her status as one of our best contemporary artists. Me and Us were truly just prelude to her 2020 record, whose title is a formal introduction. Kaitlyn Aurelia Smith is also the most talented analog synth musician that I personally have ever engaged with, and her latest album is everything I could have wanted.  

It took some self-control (aka strict time management) to not write a few thousand words about The Ascension. Let’s recall my massive thesis on Carrie & Lowell… Yes, I am a former Catholic who thrives in the ambiguous invocation of Scripture, especially from a songwriter who quite literally shaped my taste in music. Luckily, I’m not nearly as pent up with anger and existential dread as in 2015 when I was, for the first time, processing the physical and emotional distance from my family. This elongated emotional breakdown was spurred by drama between my parents, but was also due to an irrational fear I held about my own mother’s death. Listening to Sufjan Stevens forgive his mother on her figurative deathbed has stayed with me. 

The anxiety I felt about 2020 was almost entirely external, so the gorge formed from the current of The Ascension was not nearly as deep a canyon in my heart as C&L, though it is still an affecting 80-minute journey. Stevens’ production, when coupled with his lyricism, is a breakthrough, though I do hear murmurs of folktronica from earlier in the decade. (I’m begging everyone to listen to Under Our Beds by Consilience.) And for perhaps the first time, there were songs that I occasionally skip. If I still had to commute to work, I bet they would have grown on me. In fact, this would have been a perfect driving album—one that wouldn’t cause me to weep while on the interstate. (oh Carrie. oh Lowell.)

Then there was VOL.II by my dear friend Lauren Ruth Ward. She gave me an opportunity to write a unique interview with her about the record to be printed on the inside of the gatefold, making it a permanent fixture on this most exciting of sophomore albums. I could not justify writing anything more about it, if only to preserve the sanctity of that interview, which I gave more effort and attention than any other piece of writing I had done. It was a wonderful and inspiring experience that I hope to replicate. The most heartbreaking part of the pandemic’s onset, from a social perspective, was not being able to visit Lauren after the record was released. 

With all that said, 2020 was about so much more than the music I listened to. All the digital replacements for physical intimacy during lockdown made me realize that my legacy (aka all my music writing) is fragile, locked into the impermanence of the internet. So I took it upon myself to build a physical archive; in the fall, I finalized a zine template, and the first eight issues are in the can. (So far, I have 19 zines planned. Email me if you are interested in having one!) 

I’ve also been living without a front tooth since mid-March. On one hand, it’s been convenient to wear a mask to hide the hole in my mouth, but on the other hand, all I want to do is bite into an apple. (For almost two years before I even knew I had to have my tooth removed, I had been forced to slice apples before being able to eat them. The abject humiliation.) The journey with my dentists and oral surgeon has been excruciating, to say the least. Who knew three people in the same medical practice could have such mightily different styles of care? [Author’s note: I got my crown after writing this essay! :grinning-emoji:]

In sum, it was my image of myself that I was able to see a bit clearer this year. Each year I think that I’ve figured something else out about myself, which had always led me to believe that I am a most-complex, divine being. But I think a more accurate interpretation is that, put simply, I am not static. My thoughts and emotions adapt to life and life doesn’t seem to stop throwing me around like sneakers in a tumbling dryer. My pronouns are now they/them and while I don’t have many specifics as to why, I just know that this feels right. 

I hope your year was at least acceptable; 2021 promises a host of new challenges, but I think we can take ‘em. 

[missmalice202]

Designing Your Melody: Chapter 11 - Cupid’s Arrow

Chapter 01 - Chapter 10

“Today’s the day,” Marinette uttered nervously, pressing a hand against her churning stomach in a fruitless attempt to untie the knots her insides were tied in. Her nerves were stretched to the limit, ready to snap. She gazed up at the building where her fashion show would take place in a few short hours. She wasn’t ready to go inside. Not until her knees stopped trembling, at least.

She’d been a quivering mess since she woke up this morning. The countless hours of work had all led up to this moment. This was the goal she’d been working toward all these years. Every drop of blood, each drip of sweat, every single sleepless night spent hunched over her sewing machine had been for this chance to showcase her talents and hopefully catch the eye of a famous fashion house that would want to take her on as a designer.

Hands shaking, she gripped the strap of her purse in a futile attempt to steady them.

When a warm arm suddenly wrapped around her shoulders, she shrieked and nearly jumped out of her skin. Spinning in place to view her attacker, she lost her balance and nearly fell over.

“Easy there, Marinette,” Adrien chuckled, hands gripping her arms to keep her on her feet. He gazed at her as she inhaled deeply, trying to keep herself from hyperventilating. “Are you going to be okay?”

Stepping back out of his personal space, she closed her eyes and counted to three, opening them once again to observe her friend.

He’d grown into a truly handsome man. His shining blond hair was artfully styled into deceptively careless disarray, a few wayward strands falling over his brow and into his vivid green eyes. Mouth pulled into a devious smirk, she heard him continue to laugh at her clumsiness. She pouted a bit at how truly handsome he was. It wasn’t fair for someone to be so damn good-looking.

“I’m fine,” she bit, annoyed that he had once again caught her unravelling at the seams. “I’m just a little nervous.”

He laughed. “A little? When I touched you, you nearly came out of your skin.”

“You just startled me, is all.”

Once more, Adrien chuckled softly at her. “You’ll do great. The hard part is already over. Now,” he said as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders once more, encouraging her to go inside with him, “let’s do this, Marinette.”

Gathering her courage, she held her head high and stepped inside.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

“Mlle. DuPain-Cheng, music starts in twenty minutes,” the producer – a severe-looking woman with auburn hair pulled into a no-nonsense bun - informed her, clipboard firmly in her hand. “Are your models ready?”

Glancing behind her at her friends, she smiled and nodded her head. She had just finished helping Juleka dress in her first outfit: a tunic length purple sweater with a wide cowl neck that exposed Juleka’s slender shoulders and black floral print leggings. Completing the ensemble was a pair of knee-high platform boots.

Adrien stood next to her looking absolutely dashing in a deep green, v-neck t-shirt, a casual pin-striped blazer emphasizing his broad shoulders and trim waist. Dark washed jeans and white sneakers completed his look. If she had seen him in an outfit like this when she had still been infatuated with him, she would have gushed about how the color of his shirt perfectly matched his eyes and how the blazer drew attention to his perfect butt…

But she wasn’t still infatuated with him, so she’d keep those thoughts to herself, she mused.

“You guys look amazing,” she said happily. “Thank you so much for helping me today, guys. I really appreciate it.”

Juleka smiled softly and said, “No, Marinette, thank you for giving me an opportunity to walk down the catwalk. You’re helping me as much as I’m helping you. I even asked my brother to come today so he could see me model in your show. He was so proud of me when I told him I was going to be modelling during Fashion Week and it’s all thanks to you.. With as much attention as you’re sure to get with your fabulous clothes, I’ll get to shine along side you as your model.” She giggled softly as she cocked her hip out. “With clothes as cute as these, there’s no way they’re not going to love you.”

“She’s right, you know.” Adrien reached over and rested his elbow on Juleka’s shoulder, grinning at her. “You’re going to be a smash hit, my Lady. You’re not alone here. Alya is covering your show for her blog, Nino’s up in the DJ booth cuing up the music as we speak, and don’t forget your parents out in the audience. We’re all here for you and we’re so proud of you.”

“Thanks, guys.” Reassured from her friends’ kind words, she shook her head and focused on the task at hand.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

In the audience, Luka was waiting patiently for the show to begin. Looking around, he saw a few familiar faces, which put him at ease. Across the room, up in the DJ booth, Nino had his headphones on, jamming out the music only he could hear as he got his set list ready for the show. Wondering at the small world he lived in, he spotted Alya Cesaire, Nino’s girlfriend, sitting in the front row, taking pictures with her cell phone and excitedly tapping away on the screen. Must be doing a story on Fashion Week for her blog, he thought. He’d run into her a few times when he and Nino had collaborated together on a project.

Personally, he was excited to see his sister in her first fashion show. Really was proud of how much she’s grown in the past few years. When she had first told him she wanted to be a model, he supported her dream whole-heartedly, but worried whether someone as introverted as she could make it in such a cut-throat business.

His worries had been unnecessary. She had proved all who doubted her wrong and had been steadily finding work doing magazine ads and even appearing on a few billboards recently. But nothing could compare to this. Even though it was for an unknown designer, being able to put that she’d modeled in a Fashion week show would open a lot of doors for her modeling career and he wished nothing but the best for his beloved sister. He’d be there to watch over her, after all.

When the lights dimmed, he sat up, eyes focused on the raised catwalk and waited to see his sister. Techno music pounded through the once silent room, increasing the energy level in the room with is solid base beat.

Behind a screen at the entrance of the stage, he saw a feminine silhouette appear, striking a sassy pose with her hip cocked and her hand behind her head. His mouth gaped as he watched his sister - his shy, mild mannered sister – strut down the lane, hair billowing behind her and her eyes on fire. He could barely recognize his sibling in this fierce woman posing at the end of the walk, showcasing the outfit she was wearing.

When she disappeared backstage, the screen illuminated again, this time outlining a male model. His eyes widened when he recognized the man from advertisements plastered with his face all over the city. It was Adrien Agreste, the face of his father’s internationally branded fashion line. Screams erupted in the room as the audience recognized the handsome model strutting down the catwalk with the grace and intensity of a panther.

The designer responsible for this show was very smart to use him for their show, he decided. Come morning, their designs would be plastered all over social media and possibly even the news now that Adrien Agreste was the one wearing them. And his sister would be piggy-backing on top of that fame, launching her own career into possible fame.

Once the blond model retreated backstage to prepare his next outfit, Luka watched as his sister once again took the stage, wearing a completely different ensemble. How they changed her entire look in less than two minutes was absolutely astounding. It must be pure chaos behind the scenes, he mused.

However, his amusement faded as he continued to watch the show. With each ensemble that was shown, his eyes narrowed further. He recognized some of these clothes. He’d seen them taped to the wall when he’d delivered that fabric to his designer.

It’s impossible, he thought to himself. There’s no way such coincidences exist.

Still denying the possibility that the girl he’d been looking for for so long was the one who was responsible for the show that his sister was modeling in, his jaw dropped when Adrien walked out in his final look: the embroidered blazer that Luka had seen hanging on the mannequin.

Suspicions confirmed, he grinned, disbelieving his luck. Now, he wouldn’t have to try to track her down. He found her without even knowing he’d done it. Even better, his sister already knew his elusive designer and could introduce her to him after the show.

He whistled under his breath when he saw the show’s final piece. Juleka came out dressed in a gorgeous dress. The strapless top shimmered with beads under the bright stage lights. A silver-buckled black satin belt transitioned into a full skirt. The outer layer of black satin contrasted beautifully with the deep purple satin lining, visible due to the front of the skirt ending at Juleka’s thighs and the back cascading down to the floor. Opaque black stockings covered her exposed legs and protected the modesty of his sister, which he was secretly grateful for.

She gracefully walked to the end of the catwalk where Adrien was waiting for her. With a final pose, the two models leaned into each other with wide smiles in response to the roaring applause thundering through the room. turning toward the entrance of the stage, they waved, gesturing for someone to join them.

Tearing his eyes away from his stunning sister, his breath caught when the designer stepped on stage. He could almost hear the twang as he felt a punch in the gut, like he’d been shot by Cupid’s arrow.

She was petite and slender, her limbs willowy and graceful as she joined her models. Her dark hair shined blue under the lights, pulled back into a bun at the base of her neck with a few tendrils escaping to caress her neck. Her bright, blue eyes glistened with unshed tears as she stood proudly next to her designs. Pink lips stretched into a grin as she reached her hands out to either side of her and took her companion’s hands. With a final smile at the audience, the trio bowed, thanked the audience for their praise, and escaped backstage.

Luka was stunned. How on earth had he missed how pretty she was when she crashed into him that first day? In his defense, she had been in such a hurry and so he hadn’t had the chance to get a good look at her, but had he really been so oblivious?

Unable to wait another minute to finally meet his elusive muse – and congratulate his sister on a job well done – he rose from his seat and made his way back stage, eager to be introduced to the blue-eyed beauty responsible for the music pounding in his head.

-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-xXx-

Chapter 12

*OMG, It’s almost time! He knows! Aaaaah! Hahaha, sorry. I’m just really excited for these two to get some time together in the same room. Next time, I promise! But things aren’t going to go so easily for them once they do meet face-to-face mwahahaha!

Once again, thanks for taking the time to read this and give me your likes and reblogs. Leave me a reply about what you like, what you don’t like, and what you’d like to see. Your feedback gives me fuel to better myself and my writing.

Until next time, my lovelies, XOXO*

@write-for-your-life2

[babayagatestblog]

Ivory snuffbox showing the Abduction of Io, 1825. V&A Museum, London.

Over the last few weeks, during my lockdown drift, I’ve been browsing through a collection of pocket snuffboxes held at the Victoria and Albert Museum in London. Snuffboxes were lavishly decorated containers used to store pulverized tobacco, a popular stimulant and panacea for the aches and pains of the European aristocracy during the colonial period. The boxes at the V&A – available to view in intricate detail online – are glitzy, ostentatious combinations of gold, silver, tortoise shell, fine wood, diamonds, and semi-precious stones. Many include tiny porcelain paintings of lovers or tales from antiquity. This one, made in London in 1825, features an elaborately carved ivory depicting the rape of Io, a priestess of the goddess Hera, seduced by Zeus in the form of a cloud. Another box from Germany in 1765, made of a lawn-green chrysoprase and diamonds laid over pink, orange, and yellow tinsel, slightly resembles a rose garden, or a really gaudy Claire’s compact.

Before the French revolution, the most sought-after architects, designers and craftsmen in Paris had workshops for the production of little boxes and trinkets. At the height of the craze for courtly elegance, these ‘toys’ could be found all over Europe and Russia, in pockets newly sewn into trousers and skirts. King Frederick of Prussia, a huge collector of little boxes, carried one around with him at all times. It was even said that his snuffbox stopped a bullet from killing him during the Seven Years War. Later, before he died, he had them all laid out in his room, surrounding him like reliquaries, or miniature tombs. 

I don’t know what got me thinking about this object, but now it won’t leave me alone. It keeps coming into my mind, troubling me during moments I least expect it. Maybe it has something to do with the word. ‘Snuffbox’ conjures up all sorts of unsettling associations. ‘Snuff out,’ ‘snuff film,’ putting something in a box, a casket. In addition to keeping someone’s hands busy, offering snuff evolved into a secret social code of wordless gestures, the ‘Language of the Tabatière.’ I can’t help but imagine that these boxes were somehow a precursor to the iPhone, their role as addictive distraction well outliving the form.  

Chrysoprase & diamond snuffbox owned by Frederick II, 1765. V&A Museum.

Although hugely popular in Europe, snuff was originally used by indigenous populations across Brazil and the West Indies. While traveling the New World as part of Columbus’ second voyage, a Franciscan monk came upon a priest in Haiti snorting pulverized tobacco. The still mysterious herb was then introduced to the Spanish court and promoted as a cure for headaches. Under the reign of Queen Anne, snuff was called the “final reason for the human nose,” while Catherine de Medici proclaimed it the “Herba Regina.” By the 17th century, England, Portugal, and Spain all had colonies in the Americas in order to satisfy a growing demand in Europe. Having exhausted the labor of native populations, roughly 10.5 million Africans were transported to work on tobacco, rice, and sugar plantations in South America and the Caribbean. (For comparison, only about 6% of people enslaved as part of the Trans-Atlantic Slave Trade were shipped to North America). In retrospect, the winsome décor of the snuffbox seems to contradict, obscure, or deny this wider history of cultural robbery and enslavement. 

“Jack and the Golden Snuffbox” is an English fairy tale recorded by folklorist Joseph Jacobs in an 1890 anthology of English children's stories. In the story, Jack, a young boy, decides to leave his provincial home in order to explore the world and discover a new life for himself. To help him along his journey, his father gives him a magical snuffbox. After wandering for some time, Jack is taken in by a maid and her father. Jack falls in love with the maid, but her father won’t let him marry unless the boy satisfies an impossible demand. “At eight o’clock in the morning,” he says, “I must have a great lake and some of the largest man-of-war vessels sailing before my mansions, and one of the largest vessels must fire a royal salute, and the last round must break the leg of the bed before where my young daughter is sleeping. And if you don’t do that, you will have to forfeit your life.” Without any recourse, Jack decides to open up the golden snuffbox. Out come three little red men, who build him a large, supernaturally endowed war vessel floating on a lake.

Rococo engraving by Jean Mondon, 1740.

I’m no authority on folklore, and this is just the beginning of the tale. But the imagery is striking. It isn’t surprising that the snuffbox would be considered an enchanted object. The powder, originating from the Haitian ritual, was thought to have mysterious healing properties. The box could also be considered a protection from death, as the legend of King Frederick shows. But what about the psychological drama behind Jack and his future father-in-law? I’m reminded of a passage from Toni Morrison’s Playing in the Dark: Whiteness and the Literary Imagination, in which she investigates the allure of the New World as an opening for Englishmen looking to escape the “powerlessness felt before the gates of class, caste, and cunning persecution.” One could move from “discipline and punishment to disciplining and punishing; from social ostracism to social rank.” We are told that the pressures Jack faces are inordinately difficult, blown out of realistic proportion. Essentially a penniless boy, he builds himself a war vessel, clears a piece of land, travels the world, but only through the help of the red men, imagined to be otherworldly, mute, exploitable.  

When I started investigating the snuffbox, an object I came across more or less at random, I did not expect to discover such a layered history. It’s colonial background, magical suggestion, and excessive decoration are rooted in a historical time and place, but it isn’t disconnected from the here and now. “Sometimes first impressions gather up some of the residue of centuries,” says John Berger. Maybe it isn’t so strange I would have thought about this object when white Europe and America are again realizing how far off the mark they are in attempting to right the wrongs of the colonial past. This highly crafted, dazzling, revealing little object makes me consider the difference between a beauty that seeks to conceal or compensate for brutality, versus the kind of beauty in art that challenges violence, rejects it, and ultimately enables us to see more clearly our own tendencies for both violence and compassion. These are questions I am thinking about in the wake of George Floyd’s murder, when the virality surrounding his death – as well as Breonna Taylor, Ahmaud Arbery, Elijah McClain – has been such a prominent part of current visual culture.  

Death has never had a mimetic afterlife quite like this. It is there in our hand-held devices, flattened to fit into a stream of other images. Names of people who have lost lives to police brutality have occasionally been aestheticized with the help of colorful graphics for wider sharing. Are there conflicting desires behind these pictures – to both reveal and obscure? Many writers have recently challenged us to think harder about sharing on social media, including Allissa V. Richardson in her new book, Bearing Witness While Black. In her brilliant film essay and lecture, “The Black Meme,” Legacy Russell points out that there has been a certain amount of ‘gamifying’ in attempts to fit Breonna Taylor’s name into clever tweets, grocery lists, and crossword puzzles. We do not yet have the ability to look back and see what the real-life outcome of widespread sharing on social media will be. But I wondered, when scrolling through the images of the boxes on the V&A’s website, whether it wasn’t possible for people to give more consideration to what it was they are holding in their hands, and the meanings behind their own rituals of sharing. Do trends on social media somehow anesthetize us to the pain of the story? Are they themselves a form of distraction? Could I be involved in more pro-active forms of justice, and working on a more transformative form of art? The past filters into the present in ways we least expect it. It is there to help, if only we can tune in and listen.  

[himikochan]

SJW Handbook and Advice - CHICAGO-CENTRIC

Hello everyone I’ve been compiling info for protesters and non-protesters for Chicago and I thought I’d share it here. It’s copy and pasted from a few different posts but it’s somewhat comprehensive and draws on a lot of ideas I’ve seen circulating. Not all of this info is Chicago-specific, but I do talk about local laws in Chicago and bail funds in Chicago. 

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SAFETY AND GOOD CONDUCT AT A PROTEST

-Tear gas: the agent in tear gas that's painful, lachrymator, binds to water molecules. It's so effective because it gets into your throat/lungs/eyes and also binds to the moisture on your skin. If you suspect tear gas might be used at a protest [which honestly you should just guess now], you should try to make sure as much of your body is covered as possible- wear long sleeves and pants and try to cover your hair. If possible, have gloves and goggles or sunglasses handy. When you are exposed to tear gas, try to get a wet cloth against your face ASAP- the moisture on the cloth will bind to the lachrymator and prevent it from getting inside of you. Pour water on a bandana or mask and try to keep it as close to your body as possible. Walk away from the cloud of gas ASAP- and before you go inside your home, try to stuff your clothes into a bag [wash them in 4-5 days when the lachrymator isn't as reactive anymore]. Take a shower as soon as possible and try to wash your hair 2-3 times- some people have told me that you should take a cold shower. If you are directly exposed to lachrymator and it gets in your eyes/mouth/nose, rinse with milk or a water/baking soda solution ASAP. Lachrymator is a very unstable molecule and either of those is pretty effective at neutralizing it.

-IF you're in a position to try and take care of a tear gas canister [if you've come prepared with a traffic cone, water, a mask, and goggles- or you're reckless as shit] cover it with a traffic cone. That will trap the fumes. Then pour as much water as you can into the traffic cone, hopefully it will put out the fuse inside the canister. PLEASE BE CAREFUL WHEN ATTEMPTING TO DO THIS- and do some more research on how to do it properly. I have not personally had a chance to use this tactic.

-The cops may have vans with IMSI catchers and/or cell phone jammers: IMSI catchers gather information about you and cell phone jammers prevent you from being able to use your phone. Carry a watch, make an exit plan with a vehicle/public transit OUTSIDE of the area where the protest is happening, and sharpie the phone number of an emergency contact on your body. There may come a time where you want to shut off your phone- even if you don't get detained, knowing there is a friendly phone number you can access will make you feel better. Be careful about taking pictures of fellow protesters’ faces- the police are using pictures on social media to target protesters after the fact. UPDATE: I just saw another post about IMSI catchers/stingray stuff. They suggest leaving your phone at home because turning your phone off is a break in your normal patterns and can be used in a prosecution. They suggest using a burner phone- this might be the way to go if you live in a city where IMSI stuff is confirmed. SECOND UPDATE: Imperfect protection measures STILL DO SOME GOOD. There are plenty of reasons you can be in a position where you need your cell phone on you and turning off your location services and/or putting on airplane mode for a time may still do you some good!!! IMSI catchers rely upon being the strongest signal in an area [cells automatically connect to whatever seems to be the strongest signal carrier]. From what I understand IMSI catchers have a limited range and basically a max capacity of how many phones they can support while still being the strongest signal in a given area. So for large protests, they'd need to deploy a lot of trucks with IMSI catchers to collect lots of data about crowds. IN MY PERSONAL PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE, which is not universal and may be out dated information, the Chicago police tend to use cell phone jammers [which prevent you from getting a signal at all]. This way they can try to stop protesters from calling/texting each other- make an out strategy with the people accompanying you about where to rendezvous if you're separated. Here is a little information regarding IMSI catcher use in Illinois."The law permits law enforcement agencies to use CSS devices only to locate, track the location of, or identify a communications device—in other words, they cannot configure them to capture the content of any communications. [...] Is CPD abiding by state law rules? It is impossible to say without any record-keeping or audits. CPD has not responded to our most recent FOIA request for information about any new policies, procedures, or records on its use of this technology, so we can only assume that it has not developed any."

-That being said: many capabilities of your phone rely upon knowing where you are to work. So IMSI catchers aren't the only thing you need to worry about.

-If you're able, bring water and some first aid supplies [such as gauze, tape, antibacterial cream, saline solutions, gloves, wipes etc] for fellow protesters [and maybe snacks]. Even at past tepid protests, I've seen fellow protesters fall into glass or hurt themselves trying to climb into higher ground just to see. If you don't know how to administer first aid for things like lacerations, ASK FOR HELP. Many protests have people trained to help and we're all in this together. You might want to read this thread on gunshot wounds, it's better to loosely know what you're supposed to do, just in case. Learn to apply a tourniquet- hint, it’s not just putting a belt around someone’s leg.  The snacks are to keep everyone’s spirits up and remind us that we’re in this TOGETHER.

-Running is easier with a backpack than a messenger bag, wear comfortable shoes, and have something to write with. The mood might strike you to change your sign a bit, 

-If you’re protesting in an area that isn’t close to where you live, try and reach out to someone that lives in the area. You may need to get out quickly and no way to get home and need a safe house- in Chicago, the mayor instituted a curfew from 9pm-6am at 9:04 tonight after the city had blocked every bridge and shut down public transit. Protesters are now basically locked into our downtown area with no way to get home and the police are allowed to detain anyone outdoors.

-Check in with other protesters. Do your best to maintain social distancing, but try to make sure that your fellow protesters are not lagging behind due to injury or something else. Solidarity is the goal above all else.

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Lori Lightfoot has kept the curfew in place and Chicagoans are expected off the streets between 9pm-6am until further notice unless they have an "essential job". Public transit has been stopped altogether in many areas- so if you have to go out, book enough time for you to walk there and back.

Here are some important reminders of your rights- if your are arrested, stopped in you car, and what to do with your phone. PLEASE READ THEM FOR YOUR SAFETY. KNOW YOUR RIGHTS.

IF YOU ARE STOPPED:

-In Chicago, the police are permitted to ask your name and address and other questions (to determine if you are involved in a past/present crime). I believe you only NEED to give them your name, regardless of how many questions they ask you.

-You should refresh yourself on how to properly invoke your right to remain silent. Remember to ask “Am I under arrest/being detained?” If they say yes, you HAVE to say “I’m invoking my right to a publicly provided lawyer, and my right to remain silent.” SAY EXACTLY THAT- variations of that phrase are NOT always effective and the cops will use any opportunity they can to undermine your rights and not give you a lawyer. YOU MUST STAY SILENT- otherwise you’re technically waiving your right to remain silent and MUST EXPLICITLY re-invoke your right when you’re done talking for it to apply. 

IF YOU ARE STOPPED FOR QUESTIONING:

-Police may “pat-down” your clothing if they suspect a concealed weapon. The ACLU says do not physically resist, but make it clear that you don’t consent to any further search.

IF YOU ARE STOPPED IN YOUR CAR:

-Upon request, show them your driver’s license, registration, and proof of insurance. In certain cases, your car can be searched without a warrant as long as the police have probable cause. To protect yourself later, you should make it clear that you do not consent to a search. It is not lawful for police to arrest you simply for refusing to consent to a search.

ON THE TOPIC OF UNLOCKING YOUR PHONE:

I haven't found any hard and fast rules about whether or not you have to unlock your phone if you are held by the police. A Vox article from February 2020 says "If your phone is protected by a passcode or biometric unlocking features, there’s a chance cops can’t gain access to your personal data. But that’s not guaranteed. [...] But if your phone is locked with a passcode and law enforcement can’t hack into it, the Fifth Amendment may be your friend. Essentially, the Fifth Amendment says you can’t be compelled to give self-incriminating testimony. [...] Testimony, in this case, is defined as revealing the contents of your own mind. Therefore, civil rights advocates say, the government can’t force you to tell them your phone’s password." But this is still being played out in the courts- there's tons of pending cases and no real precedence for this on either side.

Freedom.press in an April 2020 article says "If you are arrested or taken into police custody, you should verbally state that you do not consent to a search of your devices. A law enforcement agency is only permitted to conduct a warrantless search of your device if a compelling case for an emergency can be made." There's a lot of potentially useful information in their article, which I will link in the comments.

REMEMBER- cops are easily protected most of the time for infringing on our rights regarding being searched if it could be considered "reasonably" legal for them to do so [even if it isn't]. Saying "I want a lawyer, dog" does not invoke your right to an attorney, being silent does not invoke your right to remain silent, if you do not verbally refuse to be searched your silence is taken as consent to be searched. The limited dissemination of information on the legality of searching a phone could protect them if they coerced/forced you to unlocking your phone.

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If you are in Chicago and see a post/event about protesting today or tomorrow [June 1st].  DO RIGHT BY YOURSELF AND MAKE SURE IT'S A REAL PROTEST.

I've heard that some VERY suspicious people are putting together a BLM protest in Chicago tomorrow. These people are NOT experienced organizers, NOT affiliated with BLM Chicago, and NOT known to anyone in the Chicago organizing/protesting communities.

We KNOW that a lot of the rioting and looting in other cities were begun and propagated by the police and white supremacist groups [not by protesters or ordinary citizens]. We do not know if these people are cops, white supremacists, or just irresponsible folx, but it could very well be a trap to escalate violence, incarcerate allies, and justify the Mayor granting more restrictions on the city. 

The source I saw was for the purpose of organizing medics to deal with the inevitable fall out, but protect yourself and your fellow protestors by not going to this sham event.

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Hello everyone- protesting not your cup of tea? That's okay! Protesting is the showiest part of being an active citizen and activist, but it's by no means the most important part.

Below, I'll be posting links for people that need your money AND non-monetary ways you can help.

-If you know people protesting in your area, offer them a place to clean up afterwards and possibly crash if public transit is closed off. If you can safely offer them a shower and a place to change clothes- that can make a huge difference. It could help them evade being targeted by the police on the way home, buy them time to get home without being part of a crowd, and they may need a place to wash off residual tear gas or pepper spray [or the blood of a comrade]

-If there are protests in your area and you have extra supplies [water, pre-packaged snacks, materials for signs, gloves, first aid kits, masks, etc], you can hand them off to a protester OR leave them in a place they'll find them with a note.

-Be wary showing the faces of protesters on your social media or having them saved online. Be mindful about who you're sharing details of a protest or protesters with and try to do your best about sharing accurate information about donations. One of the bail funds in another city recently had someone set up a fake venmo account under the name of the bail fund and many people donated to it, believing they were helping bail people out.

-Your friends with small businesses may want help or need supplies boarding up their windows- most protesters are avoiding small businesses when things turn sour [and in fact, most looting and rioting appears to trace back to undercover cops and white supremacists right now] but it's still a good idea to close up shop if you can. See if anyone needs help securing their business. .-Make fliers about properly administering first aid, basic rights regarding being detained/questioned/arrested, and phone numbers of local communal bail funds. 

-Many people who were on the fence about BLM, police brutality, and protesting are beginning to see the truth of it all now that the pandemic has forced us to confront racial/ethnic and class inequality. We have more allies than we did before- make sure to give them the toolkit necessary to enacting change. 

Protesters need funds in so many places right now: 

-Chicago Communal Bail https://chicagobond.org/

-ACLU Illinoishttps://www.aclu-il.org/en/donate

-BLM Chicago https://www.blacklivesmatterchicago.com/donate/

-The Family of George Floyd https://www.gofundme.com/f/georgefloyd

-Minnesota Freedom Fund https://minnesotafreedomfund.org/

-ACLU Minnesota https://www.aclu-mn.org/en/donate

-The Bail Project https://bailproject.org/

[soccernetghana]

How will football move on when Messi and Ronaldo retire?

Lionel Messi or Cristiano Ronaldo? It's the question that has defined a decade of football; the cause of innumerable arguments across the globe. In the age of social media, you are not allowed to appreciate both. You have to pick one or the other. And whom you chose apparently tells you a lot about how you view the game. As Luis Figo famously argued, it really is a question of taste: "It's like choosing between white truffle or caviar." Indeed, the one thing that everyone agrees on is that both are incredible; both belong in the conversation on the best player of all time. They are, after all, responsible for an unprecedented rivalry in the history of the game: two all-time greats on opposite sides of the Clasico divide for nine years, pushing one another to scale even greater heights. As Messi himself told DAZN: "It was a duel that will last forever because it went on for many years, and it isn’t easy to keep at your highest level for so long – especially at those two clubs we were at, which were so demanding, in Real Madrid and Barcelona, the best clubs in the world. "Competing head to head for so many years will be remembered forever. The sporting rivalry between us was very nice on a personal level. I think that the fans also enjoyed it, be they Madrid or Barca supporters, or just those who like football." It is not over yet, of course. Ronaldo and Messi may be 35 and 32, respectively, but they have yet to show any real signs of letting up. The Portuguese may have changed teams, leaving Real for Juventus in 2018, but the rivalry with Messi endures; the debate rages on – at least among their most ardent supporters. When Ronaldo transferred to Turin, his fans followed. Juventus' social media numbers skyrocketed, highlighting this new phenomenon of some supporters prioritising players over clubs. These very modern consumers of football have a favourite player – not a favourite team, which begs a far more pressing question than Messi or Ronaldo: What happens after the pair retire? Will football lose followers? The two greatest protagonists in the most absorbing drama of the past decade will have left the stage – will some of the audience leave before the next act? After all, how could anything top what has gone before? Ronaldo and Messi have distorted our perceptions of what is possible on a football field, making the extraordinary, ordinary. They have altered our idea of what constitutes an excellent goal-scoring season. Anything less than 50 goals a season could, in future, be construed as underwhelming. And that is the key here: consistency. "They've done it for so long," Spanish football writer Andy West told Goal. "They've barely taken a week off. They've both had the physical fitness to play 40 or 50 games a year. Neither of them have really had serious injuries problems, which is amazing in itself. If you go back over the history of the game, there are very, very few players who are able to sustain that excellence for so long. "Even if you look at players just from my lifetime, such as the Brazilian Ronaldo, he was the best player in the world at his peak, but he had so many injury problems that meant he was only at his greatest for a short period of time. "They've not given anybody else has had a look in. There have been lots and lots of great players over the past decade who would have previously had a claim on being the best player in the world but they've not even been close. I don't think anyone would dispute that. Nobody has been close to the level of Messi and Ronaldo." Hazard and Neymar? Not even someone like Eden Hazard. The Belgium international was one of the best players in the world for years, lighting up the Premier League with his wing wizardry at Chelsea. However, even Hazard has admitted that he is simply incapable of matching Ronaldo and Messi's numbers, as so painfully underlined by the 29-year-old's form and fitness issues in his first year at Real Madrid. "I often ask myself what I can do to become like Messi and Ronaldo and get 50 or 60 goals in a season," he confessed to Sport/Foot. I try, of course, but I realise that I will never be a true goalscorer like them. It's not in me. It is mainly mental: at 2-0, not thinking that is enough for example. Sometimes I still think after a goal, 'That's enough.' "I'm not in search of records like some other players – if I can score between 15 and 20 goals each season, I will be very happy." One could never imagine Messi or Ronaldo being content with such a tally. Of course, for the sake of narrative, they are portrayed as polar opposites: Messi is the quiet, unassuming genius who puts the team first; Ronaldo the self-made goal-scoring machine who takes as much pride in his appearance as his records. Both are crude caricatures, which do both a disservice. Messi can be as ruthless as Ronaldo; Ronaldo can be as magnanimous as Messi. In addition, they are bound not only by brilliance but also determination, an inner drive that has seen both make the absolute most of their considerable skills. Which is perhaps why Neymar is no longer the favourite to step into the spotlight when Messi and Ronaldo bow out. There have never been any doubts over the Brazilian's ability but his level of focus has long been a cause for concern. Neymar's situation has hardly improved in the interim. If anything, that storm has only worsened. As has his physical condition. Since moving to Paris Saint-Germain for a world-record fee in 2017, Neymar has been blighted by injuries and ill-discipline. At 28, his career path now looks more likely to follow that of Ronaldinho than Ronaldo, having, thus far, failed to strike the perfect balance between sporting and commercial growth. Time for Mbappe and Haaland? But what about the next generation? Kylian Mbappe and Erling Haaland are considered the frontrunners to fill the void that Messi and Ronaldo will leave behind. Both are extraordinary young talents. Mbappe is the only man other than Pele to have scored in a World Cup final as a teenager; Haaland is the youngest player in history to score 10 Champions League goals, having reached that mark in just seven matches. Their potential is as obvious as it is enormous. Questions remain, of course. Can they sustain their fine form? Will they avoid serious injuries? Will they be as dedicated to their profession as Messi and Ronaldo? Both are considered colourful characters. Haaland's former Red Bull Salzburg team-mate Maximilian Wober described the Norwegian to Goal as "crazy insane" yet recalled how the striker would spend his time on away trips "reading scientific articles on who he could improve his sleep pattern or diet" while the rest of the team were playing cards. In a similar vein, Mbappe once skipped a party in honour of Monaco's shock 2016-17 Ligue 1 title triumph so that he could get enough rest to be in peak physical condition for the following day's training session. The Frenchman was only a teenager back then, though, and there having been growing concerns about his allegedly egotistical behaviour since being taken under Neymar's wing in Paris, as underlined by his recent spats with PSG coach Thomas Tuchel. Mbappe has admitted himself that he is "not a hard worker" but is still regarded by journalists who follow the French league and national team closely as someone who simply loves playing football. As long as he retains that passion for the game, he should – like Haaland – continue to rack up record after record. Of course, it would be unfair to expect anyone to equal Messi or Ronaldo's remarkable strike-rates. Or carry the game into a new era, for that matter. Besides, it's not as if the Messi-Ronaldo rivalry has been the only show in town over the past 10 to 15 years. Messi has never played in the Premier League, while Ronaldo left in 2009 – yet the English top-flight is by some distance the most watched and, consequently, the richest championship in club football. There are, of course, many reasons for its global popularity: the sheer pace of the game separates it from its European rivals; what it loses in quality, it makes up for in frenzied entertainment. In addition, the almost total absence of running tracks around its pitches only accentuates the raucous atmosphere generated by the massive and passionate crowds found with its modern stadia. England changed its practices and image following the Heysel and Hillsborough tragedies of the 1980s, and reaped the rewards. With the advent of the Premier League in 1992, English football became a perfectly packaged product expertly sold to audiences across the globe by BSkyB and, in turn, the further riches bestowed upon clubs by the sale of overseas TV rights enabled the acquisition of some of the most talented and charismatic characters in football. All of this, coupled with the sport's innate capacity for unscripted drama, made the Premier League compelling viewing. Essentially, football faces a far more pressing concern than the imminent retirement of two living legends, with the Covid-19 pandemic having plunged the game into financial crisis that represents a very real existential threat for clubs and leagues across the world. By its very nature, though, football is a simple game. Its popularity will not be dimmed by the pandemic; if anything, it may be enhanced by it, as people become even more appreciative of a sport that can be played by anyone with a ball. So, if football can survive Covid-19, it can survive the loss of Messi and Ronaldo. The show will go on. But so too will the debate over who was better: Messi or Ronaldo? There will never be an agreement, of course, but that is beside the point. As Messi says, his rivalry with Ronaldo is a duel that will last forever. Source: m.allfootballapp.com source: https://ghanasoccernet.com/

[meta-squash]

Intro to the Manic Street Preachers

(In which I wish I still had photoshop so I could make one of those silly slideshow type posts)

It’s come up in at least 3 separate conversations recently that I (or someone) should make an “intro to/how to get into the Manic Street Preachers,” so I’m gonna do that.

Also I tried to be brief but when it comes to the Manics and also writing in general that is not in my nature.

So here goes, a Manics 101 that is slightly longer than I anticipated but not as long as I might have made it:

First of all, a brief Manics history/bandmembers 101:

James Dean Bradfield - Lead singer, lead guitarist. Writes most of the music for the songs. Also has the job of cutting down the lyrics into something he can actually sing.

Nicky Wire - Lyricist, bassist. Writes the lyrics for the songs, with Richey and alone. Says he can’t play bass but is actually quite good. Loves to wear dresses/skirts onstage and is generally a fashion disaster. Has a big mouth and loves to criticize other bands. Has OCD and loves to clean. Is 6′3″ and has great legs and loves to mention both of those things.

Sean Moore - Drummer. Also writes some of the music. Is the only Manic who is classically trained, and sometimes plays trumpet on tracks. Sarcastic and small. Generally quiet and doesn’t like interviews. Is the only Manic actually active on social media (Twitter).

Richey Edwards - Lyricist, rhythm guitarist. Wrote most of the lyrics with Nicky and was essentially the band’s spokesman. Was extremely intelligent. Couldn’t play guitar well, basically stuck to power chords and usually forgot them anyway. Struggled with severe mental illness and addiction. Disappeared in 1995; his body was never found.

The band have all known each other since they were children and all lived in the same neighborhood. The band itself started basically in about 1989. Their thematic mantra was “culture, alienation, boredom and despair.” They were inspired by The Clash, Situationism, the Miners Strike and the various existentialist or absurdist literature they’d read. Their sound and style have changed pretty much every album. They’ve never managed to break into the American music scene but they are/were popular in Asia and Europe. Most of their songs are political or emotional, and rarely talk about love or relationships in the traditional sense. They didn’t go aboveground until 1996 and didn’t get a number one in the charts until 1998.

Where to start:

The Manics have changed their sound/style a lot, so it sometimes depends on what you like.

The bands most popular/charted songs are: Motorcycle Emptiness (1992) Faster (1994) A Design For Life (1996) If You Tolerate This Then Your Children Will Be Next (1998) Your Love Alone Is Not Enough (2007) Rewind The Film (2013) Walk Me To The Bridge (2014) International Blue (2018)

But, like I said, it depends on what you like. So, here’s a rundown of suggestions for songs to listen to in order to get into them. I’ll link the song itself, give a little description of the album/song style or sound, themes, etc. Possibly some extra info if I think of any. And probably reasons why it’s a good introductory song. I’ll go chronologically, but feel free to pick and choose.

Motorcycle Emptiness - 1992. Generation Terrorists. An epic glam/punk rock anthem critiquing and despairing over the nature of society and modern culture. The band has said that if this song wasn’t included on the album, it would not have been successful. It’s also one of the coolest guitar songs the band has. This is often a starting song for most people.

Slash N Burn - 1992. Generation Terrorists. A much more punk rock song, a critique of the destructive nature of entertainment and “first world” culture, how entertainment means people ignore the ills of the world. This song is a good intro to their more social/political lyrics, and good for those who like the punk sound.

Bored Out Of My Mind - 1992. Generation Terrorists B-side. I’m including this because it was the first b-side I fell in love with. This is an acoustic piece, a lot more yearning and, well, tired/bored. It basically takes a punk riff and slows it down into something a lot prettier.

Roses In The Hospital - 1993. Gold Against The Soul. This is the song that made me fall in love with the band. It’s a critique of the mental health system, and a song about unhealthy coping mechanisms. This album has more of a grunge-feel to it, and is a lot more produced. The song features stair-stepping power chords and a grunge rhythm section with pop flair.

La Tristesse Durera - 1993. Gold Against The Soul. A grunge-style song about the way elderly veterans are (mis)treated and/or ignored by the general public once they no longer serve a purpose. This song has an excellent bassline and some great vocals.

Faster - 1994. The Holy Bible. This is the song the band itself and most fans hail as their masterpiece. An industrial/punk/hard rock song that has been described by James as “a set of sarcastic commandments for the modern age” and by Richey as being about self-abuse and “society speeding up - finds worth is failure.” It is a song that is utterly autonomous and judgemental, an Ubermensch of a song that is extremely powerful. It is, in the words of Simon Price “warped metal and tungsten under unendurable torque.”

This Is Yesterday - 1994. The Holy Bible. The calmest song on the album, this piece is a nostalgic look at the past. I’m mostly including it because the guitar riffs are simple but very pretty. (And because my roommate, who isn’t a fan, said she likes it a lot.)

ifwhiteamericatoldthetruthforonedayitsworldwouldfallapart - 1994. The Holy Bible. A fast-paced criticism of racism in the US and UK, filled with political and historical references. An industrial/post-punk style song with some excellent riffs and even better harmonies.

A Design For Life - 1996. Everything Must Go. An anthem for the working class. This song features strings and is a lot more “epic” than previous songs. The album itself is calmer, more radio-friendly. This was the band’s first big hit and the first album after Richey’s disappearance; it reached number 2 on the charts at its release.

Everything Must Go - 1996. Everything Must Go. A song ushering in a change in the band’s sound. It is the introduction of a larger, wider wall of sound, and the anthemic rock style of the album.

Small Black Flowers That Grow In The Sky - 1996. Everything Must Go. A song written by Richey before his disappearance, about the abuse of zoo animals. (In my opinion) The demo is better than the studio version, as it is a yearning acoustic piece that allows the guitar to echo the fragility of the lyrics. (The studio version has a harp that overshadows both guitar and lyrics, so I linked the demo which is my favorite.)

You Stole The Sun From My Heart - 1998. This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours. Lovely lyrics and a simple riff. This album has a cleaner, clearer sound. This song’s sound is optimistic even if the lyrics are slightly sadder.

I’m Not Working - 1998. This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours. A much slower, sadder song. I include this song because I think the lyrics describe a universal feeling. It’s a song that really shows the emotion of James’ vocals.

If You Tolerate This Then Your Children Will Be Next - 1998. This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours. The band’s first ever #1 single. This is an anti-fascist song about the Spanish Civil War, warning people to be aware of injustices. It’s anthemic and full of echoing guitars.

Intravenous Agnostic - 2001. Know Your Enemy. A return to their old punk sound. This is a slightly more anthemic take on the punk sound, but it works. The lyrics are weird but interesting.

Baby Elian - 2001. Know Your Enemy. A political song about Elian Gonzalez, a Cuban refugee who, as a 7 year old, was the center of an immigration and international custody battle between the US and Cuba.

Freedom Of Speech Won’t Feed My Children - 2001. Know Your Enemy. Another political song. I just love it because it’s SO anti-American.

Judge Yr’self - 2003 (1994). Lipstick Traces. This is from an anthology album, but it was an unreleased song recorded in 1994. Its lyrics are almost Nietszchean, intense and repetitive. Yet another huge hit with most fans, with themes and sound similar to Faster. An excellent if momentary resurfacing of their industrial sound of THB.

Empty Souls - 2004. Lifeblood. This album is more more digital-sounding, a lot more glacial than previous albums. The song is sad and aching, but very beautiful. It features a gorgeous piano riff and lingering guitar chords to complement the lyrics about loneliness.

Your Love Alone Is Not Enough - 2007. Send Away The Tigers. Their biggest hit since Tolerate. It’s a duet with Nina Persson, the lyrics a conversation between two people about what makes someone gain contentment and what does/doesn’t help. This is much more a radio-friendly rock song.

Anorexic Rodin - 2007. Send Away The Tigers B-side. Another favorite b-side and favorite among fans. The lyrics are clearly about Richey Edwards, but the best thing about the song is the fast-paced marching of the distortion guitar and the badass punk rock chorus.

Imperial Bodybags - 2007. Send Away The Tigers. This song is incredibly late 60s/early 70s-feeling, for some reason. An excellent grooving riff drives a song about war and imperialism and how civilian deaths are trivialized.

Peeled Apples - 2009. Journal For Plague Lovers. First track on the album and an intense, sludgy punk intro. The band has said that the lyrics of this song are pretty impenetrable but the visuals they provide are fantastic. One of my favorites, and so much weird, aggressive, wild energy. This album consists entirely of songs Richey gave to the band just before his disappearance. Because of this, the album’s sound kind of combines the sounds of The Holy Bible with the slower, prettier sounds that the band developed over the years.

This Joke Sport Severed - 2009. Journal For Plague Lovers. A short, stark acoustic song about the failure of love and one’s own inadequacy. This song is gentle and simple, with yearning vocals and lovely chords.

All Is Vanity - 2009. Journal For Plague Lovers. A song closer to the post-punk sound of The Holy Bible. A lilting riff that disintegrates into a much harder sound complements the lyrics that illustrate a conflicted idea of the self and a desire for answers.

Postcards From A Young Man - 2010. Postcards From A Young Man. This song returns to the huge, anthemic sound of Everything Must Go. The drumming/guitar is a lot “bouncier” than most Manics songs, but the tune itself has some really interesting turns. The lyrics look back on the past, lamenting losses but refusing to be brought down by them.

Some Kind Of Nothingness - 2010. Postcards From A Young Man. Another anthemic song that incorporates strings/a choir, this song is another nostalgia trip, this time a bittersweet mourning, an acceptance of grief and the ache of memories. It features guest vocals by Echo & The Bunnymen’s Ian McCulloch.

Red Rubber - 2010. Postcards From A Young Man B-side. This is a surprise bop. A song about Leopold II’s violent colonization of central Africa (and takes the title from a documentary of the same name), it features synthesizer sounds and distortion guitar. It starts out sound slow and meandering, but suddenly picks up to a frenzied punk pace. The chorus is catchy as hell and angry as hell.

Rewind The Film - 2013. Rewind The Film. This album is almost entirely acoustic. The song itself features Richard Hawley (although I personally like the demo version with Nicky Wire on the vocals) and emphasizes its simplicity with acoustic guitar and simple piano and strings parts. This is yet another nostalgia song, wishing to re-experience happy memories. This one is not as grief-stricken as the other ones, and instead almost seems like a haze-tinged daydream.

As Holy As The Soil (That Buries Your Skin) - 2013. Rewind The Film. A Nicky Wire vocal, this is a song specifically written to/for Richey Edwards. An acoustic piece that features a beautiful trumpet solo from Sean, this song also grieves for the past and remembers good times. But this time it asks for those who are being grieved to return, and reminds them of how much the narrator (Nicky) loves them. This is a song that is so emotional it hurts to listen to but it’s also impossible to stop listening to it.

30 Year War - 2013. Rewind The Film. A departure from the nostalgia-trip of the last few songs, this song talks about the history of Wales and the government war on the working class during the 80s. It also features some lovely trumpet work from Sean and a really cool clapping-style drum beat. The lyrics describe class-related struggles and accuse the rich and the bourgeoisie of using propaganda to blame the poor/working class for their situation and to keep them from rising up in resistance.

Walk Me To The Bridge - 2014. Futurology. This album is a transition into prog rock/krautrock. This song features a heavy marching bassline and synthesizers, a huge glacial sound that opens up into a chorus with shining chords. Nicky says it’s about “the idea of bridges allowing you an out of body experience as you leave and arrive in different places,” but the demo also contains a number of Richey-specific references so who knows.

Sex Power Love And Money - 2014. Futurology. The power of this song mostly rides on power chords that structure it and the almost metallic-sounding synth and drums. The song itself is so fun it’s almost silly, a critique of technology and the entertainment industry that simultaneously takes itself seriously and takes the piss. It is a criticism of the entertainment industry and the way that capitalism erases originality and organic-ness. But it’s also just a fun musical romp that is almost reminiscent of late 90s/early 2000s Bowie.

Futurology - 2014. Futurology. This is a gentler song that fuses the huge glacial sound with something more sunny. The band describe the lyrics as “a statement of existential socialism – belief that humanity is still a viable ideal.” The lyrics and the guitar are optimistic and big, with a nice bass riff supporting the synth sounds behind it.

International Blue - 2018. Resistance Is Futile. A gorgeous, soaring song. Jumps off the back of Futurology’s proggy sound but adds more body. The song itself is about painter Yves Klein and his creation of the color Yves Klein Blue.

Broken Algorithms - 2018. Resistance Is Futile. Returning to their punk roots in terms of the rhythm section and crunchy guitar chords. A song also returning to Nicky’s perpetual subject: the critique of society’s thoughtless dependence on technology/social media and the consequences it can have on social awareness and creativity and the self.

[jordanianroyals]

Queen Rania Al Abdullah of Jordan has delivered a letter to all Jordanians today on 17 October, 2019 on her Facebook page. Written in Arabic, the queen addressed a recent “smear campaign” online against her education reform efforts. Moreover, Her Majesty said she feels hurtful over some of the comments made about her on social media.

Original letter in Arabic

Below is the English translation by Roya News:

In the name of God the most Merciful, the most Compassionate,

My brothers and sisters, the sons and daughters of our beloved Jordan,

I greet you with much affection and appreciation.

As I write this letter, I am well aware that you never expected me, Um Hussein, to address you with a message that carries within it a sense of disappointment, but, as family members say to each other, “sometimes disappointment comes from a place of love.” As I put pen to paper, I am all but certain that many will criticize and disapprove of my speaking out - even those who have my best interests at heart - and I will undoubtedly hear the comment “you shouldn’t have spoken out yourself.”

However, times have changed, and what applied in the past is no longer valid. Today, social media can serve as either the greatest champion or enemy of the truth – with many abusing these platforms to bully, to sow doubt in every achievement, and to stifle every glimmer of hope.

For a while, I thought I had grown accustomed to being intentionally thrust out of nowhere into debates occupying public opinion – that is, until the recent teachers’ strike, which has thankfully ended with the return of our students to their schools. This time, I found myself in the eye of the storm and at the center of a disproportionate smear campaign, with no idea why I had been dragged into it! Nonetheless, throughout the recent weeks of public sparring, I refrained from commenting to avoid being accused of trying to hijack the conversation. But we all have a responsibility towards the truth, at all times.

I would have hoped that 26 years of public service in the areas of family and child protection, the empowerment of local communities and women, and initiatives like the education of orphans were enough to prove my intentions. I have strived to give the very best to our Jordan, and never hesitated from doing what I thought was right.

When I first decided to contribute to national education reform efforts, I understood that the road ahead would not be easy, and many advised me to avoid the “headache.” But I believed then, as I do now, that our children deserve the best, and that education is the cornerstone of social justice and equal opportunities.

I visited hundreds of schools and spoke with thousands of teachers and students, and I launched initiatives to help bridge some of the gaps I saw in our education system. I did so in the hope that they would offer new models or approaches that can address some of our challenges. My goal was never to adopt our education system in its entirety, or to implement comprehensive education solutions – that was, and will always be, the responsibility of the Ministry of Education, a much-respected institution.

I put teachers at the forefront of my efforts, because to me no other profession holds a higher status. How could I not, when teachers are the very heart and foundation of the educational process? I launched the Excellence in Education award for distinguished teachers and principals and worked to bring the best training programs to empower our educators and arm them with the skills they need.

When I established the Teacher Academy, I ensured at the time that it would not place any financial burdens on our local resources. Its team worked tirelessly to provide teachers with the most effective in-service training programs to improve the quality of our children’s education.

In 2016, following a significant decline in the competitiveness of our education system in global rankings, the National Strategy for Human Resource Development highlighted the critical need to skill teachers before they enter the classroom - something I had sensed in field.

Without hesitation and with complete conviction, the Teacher Academy collaborated with the Ministry of Education – this time, with governmental support –on the establishment of a teacher education professional diploma program to prepare the most competent teachers. We would never accept an unqualified doctor or engineer for ourselves, so how could we not aspire for the best-trained teachers for our children?

I was honored to offer our country an achievement we could all be proud of: an academy and a beacon of knowledge for Jordan’s educators. It filled me with joy to stand at His Majesty’s side and present the country with a distinguished learning institution, one that reinforces His Majesty’s and Jordanians’ appreciation of our teachers. My resolve was strengthened by my conviction that Jordan’s educational renaissance lies in developing the skills and capabilities of its teachers.

To my surprise, voices suddenly emerged questioning the intentions behind this national effort as if to impose a ceiling on our ambitions and expectations for our children. On what grounds? Was it because the academy was established on the University of Jordan campus, adding to its list of accomplishments? Or because it is a not-for-profit company? Or on the pretext that it infringes on the rights of job seekers or “privatizes” education? Or was it because they want to cast doubt on and belittle achievements?

I have never denied that the pre-service diploma has received government funding; no not-for-profit institution can undertake a project of this scale without government support and national consensus. Yet, they attacked the academy for being registered as a company, overlooking its not-for-profit status. They claimed it appropriated public lands, ignoring the fact that the University of Jordan maintains ownership of the land upon which the academy is built. They alleged that it interferes in policies, ignoring that the academy issued a clarification regarding its request more than five months ago not to be included in teachers’ career development legislation.

It’s puzzling that, since the Arab Spring, anyone who has an “issue” with the state or any of its institutions, or who has a personal grievance, or anyone seeking attention and fame, has taken to attacking the queen, the queen’s initiatives, the queen’s dresses, and the queen’s family! It has come to the point where attacking me has almost become a way for some to flex their muscles or play hero at the expense of our country.

Without offering a single shred of evidence, some have portrayed me as a powerful businesswoman in possession of hundreds of millions, or as a figure with considerable political sway on affairs of the state. It is as though a wife’s proximity to her husband is something to be held against her, and then be used to undermine His Majesty, or settle old scores.

Over the years, I have read abusive and hurtful comments on social media platforms that no Jordanian would accept about their own family, as well as words falsely attributed to me that defy logic and reason. I am not referring to those who disagree with me or have a different point of view – I accept and respect their right to do so, but that does not justify the campaign against me.

And when the slander escalates, I find myself living in dual realities: the virtual world, where I read cynicism and harshness, and the real world, where I find only affection and sincerity in every city, village, and house I visit.

I write these words to you as I approach the age of 50, never having imagined that my service or my initiatives could be taken as a pretext to criticize a Hashemite leader, who has only ever been known for his sacrifice and unshakable commitment to serving Jordan and its people. I am confident in Jordan’s potential and the capabilities of its people, under the leadership of my King, who inspires me every day. That has always been my driving force, and nothing else.

In closing, I can only say: May God keep Jordan safe from all harm, and safeguard its kind people and our King, “Abu Hussein.”

With love and devotion, Rania Al Abdullah

[soveryanon]

Reviewing time for MAG150 /X__X/

- … So this is how you guys pronounce “cul-de-sac”, you absolute barbarians. (No, you don’t pronounce that L in French……………..)

- Statement-giver was, this week again, an absolute delight of sarcasm/self-awareness/casual self-deprecation… and so honest about his own faults and wrongs and personal pet-peeves that, even with the cheating, he didn’t seem antipathetic to me at all? Except for:

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “There’s plenty of things I’ve done I couldn’t explain to you. I mean, I’m constantly, constantly looking back on my past self, and thinking: “What an idiot. How the hell could he have down such an obviously stupid thing? How was I surprised it went so badly; what a relief I’m now so much older, and wiser.” … Except that last part never really turns out to be true, does it? The line of when you were your dumb younger self seems to keep moving forwards with you, until each more mature and reasonable version of you… eventually falls foul of it, and becomes… a young idiot.”

YOU’RE RIGHT BUT YOU SHOULDN’T SAY IT………… SHHHHHHH…

- The moose thing. The effing moose thing. I love that in the middle of cheating and probably-depression/middle-age crisis and bad break-up, there was suddenly the mention of the moose:

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “I’d probably have stayed away forever if it… hadn’t been for the moose. There was a… carved wooden moose, you see, something Alberto’s grandfather had carved, apparently, and a real family heirloom. It was an ugly old thing, with this… weird angular face that always made my skin crawl a bit. I’d never let him display it in our house, so it had lived in one of the suitcases under the stairs. The suitcases I’d pulled out and filled in a tearful rage when I was leaving. So… yeah, I’d kind of accidentally stolen the moose?”

How do you “accidentally” steal a carved wooden moose. (But then, was it truly an accident? Herman must have seen it when filling a suitcase – so it may have been… bitterness and anger in the spur of the moment, a mix of wanting to steal something precious to hurt someone he had loved, and keep something precious to a person he still loved, because it reminded him of him?)

- I got the Spiral-vibes of getting lost in the endless suburb, but to me, it was pretty clear from the start that this was a Lonely statement because:

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “You’re all alone, trying to connect with people, trying to find your place in the world – but in the end, the only person you really know is yourself.”

… was textbook what Peter had told poor Brian in his very first ‘on-screen’ appearance:

(MAG100) PETER: Peter Lukas! Lovely to meet you, Brian. Now, am I to understand – you don’t work here? BRIAN: Uh, no; I was just, um… making a s–statement, o–or, or whatever, u–um… PETER: That’s probably for the best. Elias can be quite… “protective” of his people. [CHUCKLING] Never really understood why – I mean, in the end, the only person you really have is yourself! Wouldn’t you agree, Brian? BRIAN: Wh– I–I don’t… What…? PETER: Well. Plenty of time to make your mind up, I’m, I’m sure.

(Hi, This Was Another Incidental Reminder That Even If He’s Not In This Episode And Only Mentioned In Jon’s Post-Statement: Peter Lukas Is Hella Bad News.)

- Gerry had described The Lonely as “feeling that you’re just… alone. Maybe there’s no-one else there at all, maybe you just can’t connect” (MAG111); MAG150 reminded me mostly of MAG048 and MAG108 in that aspect – statement-givers surrounded by almost-people, the idea that things around are becoming empty shells, that people are fading/losing their identity? And in this episode, yeah, the dull repetitive suburb made a lot of sense (combined with impersonal TV shows and the… logic of them going wrong, the disconnect getting more and more pronounced as their actions made no sense and their words turned out to be unintelligible).

Two things strike me about The Lonely statements so far:

* They were either triggered by a Lukas (MAG013, MAG033, MAG057, MAG092, Peter Lukas being there-and-not-there throughout season 4), either… just happened for seemingly unknown reasons, just because the statement-givers had a personal rapport to isolation/loneliness/feeling singled out, initially taking comfort in it until it was twisted all over (MAG048, MAG150). (+ MAG108, but Adonis’s case is not clear to me: when Peter asked Martin “Did [Elias] suggest you record a statement today? One that mentioned me?”, was it an exaggeration and was Peter talking about The Lonely in general? Or was it literal, and Peter had been in the audience, and the one responsible for messing up Adonis?)

* … People who got out of it through an emotional anchor (Naomi’s dead fiancé in MAG013, Andrea’s mother in MAG048, Herman’s (ex-)husband in MAG150)… got out of it. No “half-finished meals”, as far as we know, amongst the people who escaped it? On the other side, Adonis dragged himself to the Institute before disappearing entirely but he knew it was coming, he hadn’t managed to escape it; same with Barnabas Bennett, who was stuck in The Lonely and only managed to transmit a call for help (that remained unanswered by Jonah). Yetunde Uthman apparently didn’t have any anchor and was a vulnerable target (Gerry had warned us that the Fears tended to pick on the vulnerable and people on the margins). There is still Carter, whose whereabouts are unknown (he was clearly messed up, but Jon didn’t mention if he was still around or not).

(… but then, there is Martin, who seems to have begun using Lonely powers, and it’s… another matter entirely to get out of that, probably.)

- Given how Herman mentioned that Yetunde seemed to have died recently:

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “My eyes found themselves focusing on the ceiling. On a small spot of red, that seemed to have seeped through from above. As I climbed those stairs, I desperately tried to tell myself I didn’t know what was going to be up there. And to be fair I was surprised by some of the details. But as soon as I saw the spot, I just knew that… someone else was up there. And that they were dead. The only questions were “how”, and “who”. I think I’d given up on “why”. I didn’t know them, as it turned out. A young woman, conservatively dressed. Her face was bloody, but… I was sure I didn’t recognise her. She had a bag with her and her ID read “Yetunde Uthman”. Not a name I’d ever encountered before. Just another victim of this place. […] I don’t think she’d been dead that long. But I’m not a doctor, and I didn’t really try to check. Instead I turned and ran, all my tiredness gone in a sudden rush of adrenalin, down the stairs, out the door and into the night and the rows upon rows of bland, empty houses.”

… I wonder if he got stuck in the Lonely place to replace her as a Fear-battery of some sort, because she had ended her own life? We may have got a similar case with Sean Kelly (MAG033): Jon mentioned that his body washed up six months after his disappearance on the boat, but that the coroner had established that “it had only been in the water for five days” – had he been stuck on the boat alone all this time, until he couldn’t stand it anymore and threw himself in the sea to make it stop…?

- This week’s static were (not including Jon when he Knew Melanie was at the door – which… has happened a lot this season. The specific thing of Jon Knowing when someone is close / about to come in):

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “I’ve never seen [STATIC:] people happily living in a place so obviously dead. Two years we lived there. [/STATIC] Two years imprisoned in that beige, comfortable house, with the man I loved, watching our relationship turn to… sniping and snapping and bitter passive-aggression. […] Because the sign said: [STATIC] “Road”. No name. Just: [STATIC] “Road”. […] [STATIC] “Avenue”. “Close”. “Way”. “Lane”. Only ever the suffix; never with the name attached.”

… And I still don’t know what to make out of that first one? Is it about being Swallowed By Banal Life?

(The statement reminded me a looooooooooooooooot of Wajdi Mouawad’s Seuls, actually, and oh. This play is indeed such a sheer complete utter Lonely mood.)

- … it’s rare, but this one was… kind of a sweet ending?

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “It was Alberto. He was… calling me. I don’t know how, but the tears came even faster now as I answered, sobbing with relief to hear him yelling at me for taking so long. Had I forgotten? Was I even planning to bother? I tried to reply, to explain, but all I could manage to say, to get through the shaking sobs… was “I love you”. He went… very quiet. And then he hung up. It didn’t matter though, because when I looked around, the windows of the houses were lit, and a woman was coming down from her front door to ask if I needed help with my car. … We’re working on it, the two of us. We’re not exactly back together yet, but I think it’s going well. He’s reluctant to sell the house, but I’ve made it quite clear that I’m never going back to the suburbs. Even if I can’t… really tell him why. I checked. To see if I could find anything about Yetunde Uthman. And I did find a few old social media profiles. But I wasn’t able to get through to any family or friends. As far as I can tell she disappeared a year ago. And nobody noticed.”

Not perfect but: it helped to push Herman to acknowledge that he still loved Alberto, they reconnected, the fact that they’re working on their relationship is honestly the best possible outcome – things aren’t perfect but… oddly hopeful? Although, at the same time, we had confirmation of what happened to Yetunde, who hadn’t been so lucky.

- … and at the same time, FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF did that statement feel like Specifically Going After Jon.

Main relationship about a duo of romantically involved males who (got) separated, snappy statement-giver who can’t stand monotony, who had the feeling of being “imprisoned” for “two years” and then got trapped alone (… Martin and Jon have been “trapped” for almost three years at this point), bitterness and annoyance covering up remnants of love; statement-giver wanting to see Alberto again, getting stuck in The Lonely, managing to get out of it thanks to his lover calling him… Jon, right after: Have I mentioned Martin recently.

(And I feel, too, that we heard a lot more… background corporeal noises than usual, in this statement? Here and there, we could hear sounds as though Jon was shifting – uncomfortable? Trying to get out of the statement’s trance as an experiment? It was especially jarring there:

(MAG150, Herman Gorgoli) “… Maybe I was hoping for a fight. Or just… to see him again. I don’t know. I was younger then. Foolish. [HUFF]”

That part was followed by some ruffling of clothes and, I think, a faint scraping of his chair? It was… quite noticeable.)

- Which makes me wonder: why did Jon read this statement? Because… it sounded way too targeted to feel like a coincidence? Annabelle made fun of Jon (and us :w) for not being sure of when and where Beholding and The Web were influencing him, if there was any influence at all, but… it’s still an actual question. Or is it that Jon was drawn towards a statement matching his feelings and mood, on his own?

If it’s Beholding-or-Web, why would they push him towards this specific statement, which seems to be basically just talking about Jon’s relationship with Martin and giving him tips on how to get Martin back? Because indeed, Jon seemed to entirely miss the point, if there was any (that to get out of The Lonely’s influence, which is insidious enough to make you feel like you’re embracing isolation on your own, you have to rely on connections – in both ways, to reach and be reached):

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: Statement ends. The Lonely is… possibly the most insidious of the powers, I believe. Certainly it is the one that… most delights in having you do its work for it. Even the Spiders seem to have a hard time matching it for sheer seductiveness. [HUFF] “Time to yourself”, “self-care”, “putting yourself forward”… “not being a burden on those you care about”… [PAUSE] It doesn’t even need to tell you any lies; just waits for the lies you tell yourself. […] And at least none of us is suffering alone. … Martin’s got it the worst, of course. But it still seems to be his choice. And I have to trust that he knows what he’s doing.

And yeah, Missing The Point is a typical Jon thing; but here, it felt… even more than that. Pointedly ignoring the statement to talk about another logic. … Is Jon fearing that Beholding-or-The-Web are trying to push him to reach for Martin and/or get him out of Lukas’s influence, and assuming that that’s precisely a reason why he shouldn’t try to pull Martin out…?

The matter of “trusting Martin” had been brought up with Basira first:

(MAG127) ARCHIVIST: Do they? … W–w–who else– Did Martin say something? BASIRA: … It was a few months back. After the attack. He’d started spending time with Lukas. At least, he said he was. And I wanted answers. He kept telling me to trust him, to hear the guy out even though he still wouldn’t actually show his face. I told him he could… drop me an email or vanish me.

(MAG129) BASIRA: Then everything ended, and Daisy was gone. And you were gone. And Tim. And then I got back to the Institute, and Martin sent me to meet the new boss. Then I stood alone in an empty office for more than one hour. I can trust me, Jon. That’s it. ARCHIVIST: [SIGH]

So is Jon reacting in opposition to Basira because he saw what happened to her? Is he sticking to his decision to “trust” the assistants that he had stated in MAG117? When it comes to his involvement with Peter, Martin has never actually told Jon to trust him; it’s something that Jon came to on his own and tried to stick to, even though he’s been obviously forcing himself and uneasy about the whole situation:

(MAG129) ARCHIVIST: No, it’s fine, I know you’ve got… whatever this is, I’m not going to question you. MARTIN: Thank you.

(MAG139) ARCHIVIST: … [SIGH] I’m just worried about Martin. … Christ… Every other Avatar gets to have their feelings… burned right out of them, but me? I’ve… just got to sit in mine. … I know he said he had everything under control. I need… to trust him; whatever he’s doing with Peter, he’s… he knows what he’s doing. Probably. I just– … [VERY FAST] I need him to be okay. I just do.

It’s still curious how Jon is sticking to this idea…? Is it because Jon knows a bit more about Martin’s whereabouts than he has been telling on tape? (His affirmation that “Martin’s got it the worst, of course.” was… a bit strange – how can Jon be so certain of that?) Is it because Martin was a bit more explicit to Daisy that they had to rely on him? (Since Daisy spotted the recorder at the end of MAG142 while Martin and her were still discussing, and she told him that she had reported their conversation to Jon in MAG144 – we might have missed some information outside of the recording.) Is it because Jon learned from the end of season 3 that Martin knew how to hide his plan, and then Jon might be overestimating him in that regard, thinking that Martin will be able to take down Peter? Is it because it has become a convenient excuse for Jon to not interact with Martin – because he’s afraid that Martin will be too disappointed and disgusted with what Jon has done and become…?

(Jon felt especially self-deprecative with the “not being a burden on those you care about”, followed by a pause…)

- Hey! We now have canon footage of Jon saying “I love you”, cheers!

- Surprise!awareness with Jon pointing out the danger Peter represents:

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: We’re… all well aware that with Peter Lukas in charge of the Institute, it’s a very real danger to all of us. We are trying. Daisy, Basira and I, we don’t leave the Institute much anymore – so we do spend a lot of time together. It’s not that easy, though. When everyone has so many walls, so many defences… [SIGH] sometimes you can feel lonely even when you’re in the same room. … But it’s better than the alternative. And at least none of us is suffering alone.

… at the same time, that arrangement sounds… so stiff and awkward. They “spend a lot of time together”. Sure, with close friends, you don’t need to do things together to be at ease and have an amazing time in the same room. But still; it… sounds so cold and impersonal, with Jon’s words…?

- ;; The vocabulary…

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: Statement of Herman Gorgoli, regarding his period trapped alone in a suburban area of Cheadle. Original statement written 9th November, 2014. Audio recording by Jonathan Sims, the Archivist. Statement begins. […] MELANIE: Jon, have you got a moment? ARCHIVIST: Uh… [DOOR CLOSES] Of course, I was just, um… having a statement. MELANIE: Uh… an, an old one? ARCHIVIST: Wh– Yes, an old one! I’m not– I’m doing my best.

That… was, I think, the first time Jon introduced a statement as “written” (instead of the usual “given”). I reaaaally hope that it’s because Jon is not perceiving the live-statements as the actual given ones, because we saw multiple times that people didn’t have a choice when it came to them (Jon would make them tell him their story, whether they consent to it or not); is it because he’s becoming suspicious of the written ones being dub/noncon’d out of people too…? In any case, that “written” was… odd.

The “having a statement” was awful and, yeah, addict getting his fix. … And at the same time, making me awfully sad: because these are people’s stories and at the moment, they’re just handled like… food. They’re consumed, and nothing else: once again, Jon wasn’t interested in any follow-up, he didn’t have a thought for Herman. We only heard about Yetunde Uthman’s disappearance because Herman searched her up and reported on it – and usually, it would have been part of the follow-up that Jon or the assistants would have provided? They would have checked for the time of her disappearance, they would have tried to find out if a missing report was filed, where and when? But here, nothing from Jon, who prefers to focus on the Fear dynamic (like he did in MAG125 when he tried to get meta on the Slaughter and the idea of control). And in the same way, we haven’t heard of Jon’s victims from season 4 at all except for Jess’s complaint in MAG142 and Jon describing what he had done in MAG146 – it feels like, for the team Archives… they’ve ceased to exist as people past the fact that Jon attacked them…?

(Once again, I!! still!! find!! it!! hard!! to be emotional over Jon right now, to feel sad or emotionally invested in him. Because: he’s not the primary victim. Depressed and in a bad place, sure; but the people he hurt don’t have a protagonist status ensuring they’re heard, and I want to hear about them the most…)

- ALRIGHT, SO.

M e l a n i e, holy Mew. Everything Melanie.

(MAG150) MELANIE: Look. [INHALE] I’m not going to do my job anymore. ARCHIVIST: … I am not sure I follow, you–you know we… we can’t… quit, we’ve all tried. MELANIE: I didn’t say I was going to quit. I said: I’m not going to do my job. No researching; no filing; no… field trips. Nothing that is going to help the Institute in any way. I’ll still be around, I just… ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] MELANIE: I can’t be a part of this anymore. If, if I get sick, I get sick. And, and if I die… ARCHIVIST: Why? MELANIE: Because this place is evil, Jon! And so… doing this job… ARCHIVIST: [LOUD EXHALE] MELANIE: Helping it out… even in small ways, i–is in some way… evil too! Every time we try to use it to do good, it just seems to make everything worse, and… and I will not be a part of that anymore. ARCHIVIST: What about The Unknowing? We, we saved the world! MELANIE: Did we? I… I mean, I–I think it was the right thing to do, but how many people were killed to do it? We, we weren’t even a neutral party; we did it as agents of The Eye, because Elias told us to. ARCHIVIST: An–and then you put him in jail! MELANIE: Martin put him there. And, and–and he’s still doing harm. [INHALE] You ever think that maybe this whole… ritual business is just an excuse, an–and that we’re all part of some… huge miserable Fear-machine? ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] I’ve… considered the possibility. MELANIE: Right. Well. If I’m… just another cog, er… Maybe I can’t leave the machine, but from this moment? I–I–I’m not turning. I’m… jammed. [SIGH]

* I love how you could hear Melanie’s efforts when it came to communication all through the exchange. She’s struggling with words, they have trouble coming out of her, almost physically; you can hear that they don’t want to come out, but she keeps pushing through. Even at the end, when she pointed out to Jon “Look, I… didn’t come here for a fight. I… just wanted to let you know what was going on.”: she put efforts into not answering with anger, she softened a bit.

* Jon had already singled her out by mentioning that Basira, Daisy and he were spending time together (leaving out Melanie) and that they weren’t leaving the Institute much anymore. We knew that it wasn’t the case for Melanie, since she had been told to frequently leave it: she was going to therapy in MAG136, Daisy said that she was out in MAG142, Georgie came to pick her up in MAG145 and MAG149. Unlike the others, Melanie has managed to reconnect with a life outside of the Institute – she has put work in her recovery, she relied on someone who was staying out of spooky matters (Georgie), she separated herself from a place she has deemed toxic. It only feel logical that she would reach the mental state and the decision to… cut her connection to The Eye even further.

* It…………………… fits……………….. her so well… I’m not sure I’m explaining it well but, with MAG117 and her rant about Elias (which really felt like a “down with the patriarchy” one?), I had gotten the feeling that Melanie… fitted well with “activism” as a notion: denouncing and firmly refusing to close her eyes in the face of things sticking out to her as unfair or oppressive.

* “Control” and “choices” have been extremely present themes this season and… Melanie is putting her own touch in that picture. Regaining control over her life, but also highlighting that even though they’re stuck in the Archives, they’re in that “dead end” too, they still have options and that even passively serving The Eye is still serving, is still choosing to feed a Fear-machine; and that they still have the possibility to… plainly stop. She didn’t say it but the idea is also quite clear that Jon still reading statements for his own survival is, in parallel, an active choice on its own. And it’s true that Jon never questioned or wondered about the possibility of stopping even though it would make him suffer – when he realised he was experiencing withdrawal without them in MAG107, he just decided that he would roll with it because his priority was still to stop The Unknowing and he couldn’t afford to waste time pondering about it:

(MAG107) ARCHIVIST: It looks like the recording of statements has now passed over from psychological compulsion into… a more physical dependence. I don’t whether this is… some sort of classical addiction or something a bit deeper. But either way, this is not the time for experimentation. I’m on a deadline, and if I need to be reading statements to stay well enough, then I suppose that’s what I shall do.

But in season 4, it’s not something he thought about questioning, or at least, not out loud. We still hear him reading statements. He’s currently choosing to try to not attack people anymore, sure, and it indeed means not hurting any more innocents… But it’s true that even reading statements is not an “innocent” act, if it’s also feeding The Eye.

* Melanie’s choice is radical and is… probably the bravest thing ever done by a character this series, along with Sasha jumping at Tim to save him from Jane Prentiss?

And there are many ways it’s going to turn awful for her – she mentioned it would probably be bad, could go to “dying” level. We heard from Tim that trying to run away from the Institute was bad. Even if Melanie manages to stick to it, in exchange for the comfort of sticking to her ideal, it will be pain and misery. It means the others will witness it. I’m not even sure that Jon will let her carry through with it – given how he didn’t “want to lose anyone else” in MAG118 and still lost Tim. It’s going to be bad, and I’m so, so impressed that Melanie is choosing to take that road, because it makes sense, but still: it’s a personal sacrifice, without glory, and yet it sounds like the most effective thing to do to stop feeding The Eye and to not participate in the Fears business.

* (… I’m not even sure, though, that Melanie’s sufferings (and/or that Jon observing it) wouldn’t… feed The Eye, incidentally.)

* GUUUUUUUH, I love the direction the similarities she shared with Tim took… We knew that they had discussed together off-record:

(MAG106) ELIAS: You already have doubts, though. You’ve been talking with Tim, and have convinced yourself that– MELANIE: [DRY LAUGHTER] ELIAS: –even if I’m telling the truth, I’m too dangerous to live. MELANIE: Well.

There were a few random/comic bits – both Tim and Melanie had expressed some longing for the real Sasha, both are bit more crude than the other characters (holders of “fuck” and “asshole”). Both expressed wariness/disgust for the tape recorders:

(MAG098) MARTIN: […] Have you seen [Jon] since…? TIM: [GRUNT] Kind of. We tried to talk, but he, he reached for that– Ah, he, he wanted to turn on his recorder. I freaked out a bit, and I said some stuff: if he wanted to talk, no tapes, I just, I just hate that thing.

(MAG136) THERAPIST: Right, have a seat. Do you mind if I record our sessions? MELANIE: I do mind. Yes. THERAPIST: Ah? I mean, it’s just for my own notes. MELANIE: I categorically and completely do not give consent for you to make any recording of me, ever. Turn it off. Please.

But what was striking this episode is how close Melanie’s words were to Tim, when it came to the Institute and their work there:

(MAG098) TIM: Still doing those? MARTIN: … Yeah. Yeah… I did ask Elias if I could stop. TIM: And he said “no” for a mysterious reason? MARTIN: I don’t know? I mean, he kind of explained – I think? Jon’s “too inconsistent” at the moment. He needs to make up for the shortfall, which, I guess, means me. … Unless you… TIM: No. MARTIN: He did suggest I try to get you involved, and– TIM: And I suggest that he not be a scary, magic psychopath. … Whoops! Too late. MARTIN: … Yeah. TIM: [SIGH] … Sorry. MARTIN: No, I– I get it. Heh. They’re not exactly much fun. TIM: Look, it’s not that. I… [SIGH] This place is evil, Martin. And I think doing what It wants? Probably makes us evil. And It wants those things to be read. I mean, I’m not gonna stop you, but, at the same time– MARTIN: I– I get it.

(MAG150) MELANIE: Look. [INHALE] I’m not going to do my job anymore. ARCHIVIST: … I am not sure I follow, you–you know we… we can’t… quit, we’ve all tried. MELANIE: I didn’t say I was going to quit. I said: I’m not going to do my job. No researching; no filing; no… field trips. Nothing that is going to help the Institute in any way. […] ARCHIVIST: Why? MELANIE: Because this place is evil, Jon! And so… doing this job… ARCHIVIST: [LOUD EXHALE] MELANIE: Helping it out… even in small ways, i–is in some way… evil too! Every time we try to use it to do good, it just seems to make everything worse, and… and I will not be a part of that anymore.

And Tim was the only one of the assistants to experience the sickness of not serving The Eye anymore/trying to flee, which Melanie took into account in her decision:

(MAG090) TIM: I hopped a flight to Malaysia. Found myself a hotel. ELIAS: I see. … You were trying to leave us? TIM: Yeah…! ELIAS: But you’ve returned. TIM: I… I got sick. The longer I was gone… I felt weak, like… like I was, I was losing myself…

(MAG150) MELANIE: I’ll still be around, I just… I can’t be a part of this anymore. If, if I get sick, I get sick. And, and if I die…

And although Melanie and Tim share a reasoning, their conclusions… differ so greatly. Tim fell into depression (confirmed by Mike in the Assistants Round Table) and ultimately chose anger and self-destruction as his answer. Melanie… goes with something that is technically self-destructing, too, but which also feels like self-preserving – and more interestingly, without anger, although it had been a long-term companion over the course of her life?

* Goooods, we got Basira and Martin visiting Elias in prison – now, I want Melanie visiting him and taking none of his shit anymore. I’m worried it would go super badly for her because Elias can be shitty when he wants to be, but still want………………… Melanie uncomfortable but resisting her anger and not letting him get under her skin this time around………………….

* I’m a bit worried over what Jon will take out of the exchange, however, since:

1°) Unlike Melanie, he has continued constantly feeding The Eye by reading the statements. The comparison does him a disservice.

2°) What Melanie said about The Unknowing:

(MAG150) MELANIE: Helping it out… even in small ways, i–is in some way… evil too! Every time we try to use it to do good, it just seems to make everything worse, and… and I will not be a part of that anymore. ARCHIVIST: What about The Unknowing? We, we saved the world! MELANIE: Did we? I… I mean, I–I think it was the right thing to do, but how many people were killed to do it? We, we weren’t even a neutral party; we did it as agents of The Eye, because Elias told us to.

… was absolutely fair and true. Nikola had pointed out to Tim just before he exploded the place:

(MAG119) NIKOLA: You… idiot! Do you really think the world will fare any better under the Watcher? You think you’re saving anyone? TIM: I don’t care.

But it also tells Jon that there is absolutely no way serving The Eye (or even being trapped with it) can do anything good, ever; that there is no positiveness to take out of their awful situation. Jon had made out of MAG127’s statement that the Institute had been created in evil purpose, that the aim of the place had always been bad… but it’s something else to be told from one of the assistant that stopping The Unknowing wasn’t even a “victory”. That Tim died almost for nothing, unwillingly furthering the interests of something he hated although he was pursuing his own revenge.

I doubt Jon’s defensiveness was out of loyalty for The Eye, but it’s true that this is not the first time it popped up this season (in MAG129, when he tried to argue with Martin that The Eye hadn’t gone “after our own” unlike Peter); it might be that Jon was still clinging to the hope that at least, getting compromised and twisted and “becoming a monster” could at least mean getting powerful enough to protect innocents and/or the world, that they could still find meaning in that… and no. Jon has been attacking innocents; and he’s being reminded that the Institute is not neutral. (And indeed: what about The Eye’s own ritual…)

* On the matter of isolation and of Jon lacking connections… although I am delighted by Melanie’s announcement, it also sounded like a goodbye. She did point out that she would still be there, but by deciding that she would stop working for The Eye, that she wouldn’t do anything resembling Archival assistant work… it sounded, to me, like she was “leaving” the Archives, and Jon too, on an emotional level. And I’m a bit worried that Jon would take it the wrong way: given that Martin doesn’t want to interact with him, and that now, Melanie is cutting one of their only connections, he’s getting even more isolated, abandoned by them?

(When talking with Gerry, Jon had called The Lonely “isolation” before learning its usual denomination, and it… might be telling that he’s more sensible to that aspect.)

- Aaaaaaaaaaaand Jon was thinking that Melanie’s therapist could be Annabelle, too, and it’s SO SILLY presented this way:

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: … Did your… therapist suggest this? […] Melanie, could you… could you describe your therapist for me? MELANIE: [CHUCKLING] What? You think I wouldn’t notice if she had cobwebs down her face? ARCHIVIST: … No? MELANIE: [DEEP INHALE] That’s it, isn’t it? [EXHALE] You… you really think I’m so stupid I wouldn’t have noticed if my therapist was some kind of monster! ARCHIVIST: I just… It was a worry. MELANIE: Right, right… Okay: I know. That is why I ruined my first four sessions, and almost torpedoed the chance at a genuinely, really good therapist, because I was so paranoid that she was going to turn out to be some… some thing trying to manipulate me – but no. She’s not full of spiders, or made of wax, or wearing the therapist’s skin, or whatever: she’s just a well-trained professional, who I am paying to help me. ARCHIVIST: O–kay. [SIGH] It’s just… The Web can be subtle, you understand? MELANIE: And? For all you know, its plan is to paralyse you with indecision…! ARCHIVIST: [SIGH] MELANIE: Leaving you… sitting here, terrified that… everything you do is somehow all part of its Grand Plan… And who do you think that fear is gonna feed? ARCHIVIST: Yes, well. [INHALE] You are… not the first, to make that point.

To be fair: Jon and Melanie hadn’t identified Elias as an Eye cultist when they were new to it, and Jon is apparently unable to focus on his Web-lighter – the therapist could still be… something (someone relevant and/or an avatar). I’m glad, though, that the therapy seems to be working!! (… although I’m a bit worried because, on the one hand, Melanie Got It when she points out she’s paying a professional to help her; on the other hand, the way she said her therapist was “genuinely, really good” felt… weird to me? It’s not something I’d say of mine? I would talk about methods and how it’s working for me but not… compliment like this.)

- Crying very hard that Melanie is absolutely spot-on on the fact that The Web is mostly a perfect culprit for Jon, at the moment. Once again. Because that was his idea in MAG146 – MAG147, too.

It’s interesting how Jon has been settling more and more with referring to The Web as “the Spider(s)” this season!

(MAG081) ARCHIVIST: I do not know how many of them there are, or precisely how they separate, but I do know that the Eye – Beholding – was not the first that I encountered in my life. The first was the Spider. The Web. And I have no idea what that might mean.

(MAG130) ARCHIVIST: I found this tape tucked in the corner of my desk drawer. [AGGRAVATED SIGH] Covered in cobwebs. I suppose subtlety is gone out the window a bit. And the question is now simply … how much I trust the Spider to have my… best interests at heart.

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: Statement ends. The Lonely is… possibly the most insidious of the powers, I believe. Certainly it is the one that… most delights in having you do its work for it. Even the Spiders seem to have a hard time matching it for sheer seductiveness.

It fits him, and I still do like how The Web is actually referred to in feminine form (“she”, “Mother”, “Mother-of-Puppets”) by People In The Known, but Jon tends to go with “it” – it’s… probably more of a “he” for him, too, because of his own personal experience, given how he (almost) met “Mr. Spider”? He’s not been the only one going with “the Spider” this season, though, it sounds like an actual way to refer to it:

(MAG121) OLIVER: Honestly, I’m… still not exactly sure why I’m here. But… you know better than anyone how the spiders can get into your head. Easier to just do what She asks!

(MAG128, Breekon) “A thrumming, silk-wrapped thing of the Spider, hiding away in an old steamer trunk. […] The Spider’s always an easy job – no fuss, no complication, everything planned and prepared. It knows too much to truly be a Stranger, but hides its knowing well enough to endure.”

(MAG136) DAISY: [SCOFF] She’s… Web. Spider’s sneaky like that. [PAUSE] Like that lighter you’re always using. Where’d you get that?

(MAG146) HELEN: There is… something wrong, with Hill Top Road. You know it as well as I do. Some strange “scar in reality” at the centre of… whatever it is the Spider is spinning. […] But the Spider’s strings are subtle, so I suppose it’s not impossible. Why?

(MAG148) ELIAS: Uh! Look, look, look. I’ve… been doing this a long time now and, if there’s one thing I’ve learned about The Web, it’s that it plays its own game. All you can really do is… hope it doesn’t get in the way of whatever your plan is. Because the Spider usually wins…!

(Although Elias/Daisy/maybe Helen could have picked up the habit from Jon.)

- rgefdjerkfd

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: … Did your… therapist suggest this? MELANIE: N–not… not exactly. … She’s just… helped me work through some things I’ve been thinking for a while, uh, she doesn’t know the details. Just that I’m in a “bad contract situation” working somewhere pretty awful. [HUFF] … She thinks I work for the Tories. ARCHIVIST: … God…

I love that 1°) this is how the therapist translated Melanie’s situation, 2°) that for Jon and Melanie, being bound to an eldritch entity feeding of pain and fear that is trying to reshape the world as a factory farm is still… way better than the perspective of working for the Tories. BABES, I LOVE YOU.

- Especially given how we only know that not serving The Eye means getting sick because Tim experienced it, that Tim had been the first one to call the Institute “evil” and to point out that working for it meant corrupting themselves, and given how The Unknowing was mentioned… I’m still utterly baffled that Tim wasn’t even namedropped in this episode. I still kind of hope that there is something coming about it because? It was super-weird?

- Guuuuh, Melanie and Daisy are so good this season!!

(MAG150) MELANIE: If you need me, I’ll be trying to get Daisy drunk. ARCHIVIST: [STATIC] Good luck. It only ever happened once in 2006, she drank a– … Sorry. Didn’t mean to. MELANIE: Sure. See you around.

… and pffft: Martin highlighted that Daisy was “pretty observant” (MAG142), and we now have confirmation that Daisy very rarely gets drunk… which means she’s probably used to watching people get wasted around her? To hear compromising stuff while she remains sober? Daisy, you’ve been getting a lot of Beholding points lately.

- That means that, right now, three members out of four of Team Archives are under withdrawal: Daisy is resisting the call of her blood/The Hunt, Jon has stopped taking live-statements (and ;; isn’t recovering well from their trip to Svalbard: MAG150, “… Still feeling weak. Restless. I want to be proactive, but there hasn’t…! That hasn’t been going quite so well for us lately.” He probably won’t truly heal until he takes one…), Melanie has now stopped working for The Eye.

- Alright, so both with Jon commenting that Basira-Daisy-and-him are spending a lot of time together bundled up in the Institute (in the Archives / in the tunnels?), and Melanie announcing that she would stop to do any work for the Archives… What are they spending their time on? Because Melanie’s decision implies that the assistants were currently still doing research and follow-ups, although we haven’t heard a trace of it lately: in season 1 and 2, Jon was constantly crediting his assistants’ work during follow-up; in season 3, we heard them adding some data after the statements they had read, and we had a few mentions of Jon asking for their help while he was away. In season 4, Jon highlighted here and there that it wasn’t the case anymore:

(MAG122) ARCHIVIST: Statement ends. [EXHALE] Well that… certainly helped, I think. No notes or follow-up in the statement, and obviously no research done by myself or… my team.

(MAG123) ARCHIVIST: Statement ends. The Web does seem to have a preference for those who prefer not to assert themselves. The investigation is tricky, I don’t want to impose on Basira and, obviously, Melanie and… Martin… aren’t available, but I did do some light searching myself on Gregory Cox.

(MAG124) ARCHIVIST: … Of course, even if I did want to do research into the statement, I wouldn’t have any help doing so. It’s been a week and… Melanie’s attitude towards me hasn’t softened. And Basira, though she is very willing to talk, still doesn’t seem to trust me enough to let me in on whatever plans she might have – if she has any plans at all, of course.

(MAG126) ARCHIVIST: I did do a small bit of follow-up on Deborah Madaki, just for my own curiosity. She didn’t go to Sannikov Land in the end.

And Jon admitted in MAG148 that he was less interested in doing a follow-up, which he has indeed… stopped doing at all at this point. Annabelle had also portrayed Jon as unable to not read out a statement once he has it in mind nowadays (MAG147: “But think about it, Jon: when’s the last time you were able to read a statement quietly to yourself without instinctively hitting record and speaking it aloud? It is just instinct? Habit? Or is it a compulsion – a string pulled by the Ceaseless Watcher or the Mother of Puppets? Or both? I know the summaries have started to confuse you. Where did they come from, when you read a statement fresh? How do you just… sort of know what it’s about, before you even start to read it…? But by then, you’re away: the roller coaster is dropping and you’ve no real choice but to hold on and hope that… I don’t crash you.”), although she might have been trying to confuse him on purpose (since… he had done follow-up into statements shortly before that episode, which implied doing some work before reading the statements out loud…? Or is it that the overall glimpses of what-this-statement-is-about-before-reading-it were enough to do some research?).

But in any case: there was no mention of Basira, Daisy or Melanie providing any follow-up this season. So… what have they been doing, in the Archives, that counted as “assistant work” to not get sick? Follow-ups on past statements? On statements we haven’t heard yet? On dummy statements? Or did they just do some filing and/or organising (like Tim was moving boxes around in MAG104)?

- We’re going back to the “assistants can’t quit” deal and aaaactually:

(MAG150) MELANIE: Look. [INHALE] I’m not going to do my job anymore. ARCHIVIST: … I am not sure I follow, you–you know we… we can’t… quit, we’ve all tried.

If we trust his words (…), Elias indeed confirmed the trapping aspect (MAG092: “Basira is now tied to the Institute. All of you are. Like fingers on a hand. And I am the beating heart of it. Should I, or the Institute, be destroyed, you will all, unfortunately, follow suit.”), but I’m curious about Jon’s “we’ve all tried”… because as far as we know, only Tim tried to quit?

(MAG065) ARCHIVIST: Then quit! If you hate it so much, leave your post in the Archives. Permanently. TIM: You’re firing me? ARCHIVIST: … I’m offering you a chance to quit. No notice period, I’ll even make sure you get the rest of the month’s paycheck. [PAUSE] Just say the words. [STATIC RISES] TIM: I want to. ARCHIVIST: So do it. TIM: I… … can’t. ARCHIVIST: [SOFTLY] Why not…? TIM: I… I… I–I can’t! I don’t know… Why can’t I quit?! ARCHIVIST: I–I don’t know. But I don’t think I can fire you either. TIM: What? ARCHIVIST: It’s this place. TIM: I don’t understand. ARCHIVIST: Neither do I. [STATIC FADES] I’m trying to figure it out, I’ve– I’ve got the shape of it but… I’m sorry, Tim. Truly I am. But I cannot, and will not, trust you. This place isn’t right, you see that now. I don’t know how or why, but there is something very wrong with the Archives. And I don’t know who here is a victim of it… and who is an agent. TIM: So… what do we do? ARCHIVIST: For now? I suppose we just… do our jobs. TIM: I don’t want to. ARCHIVIST: No…

(MAG079) TIM: There is something in this place, and it’s messing up our heads. It watches us all the time. It stops me quitting. I’m pretty sure it would stop Elias firing Jon even if he decided to actually try running this place for once. MARTIN: You’re sure you don’t just want to stay? TIM: I’m. sure. MARTIN: But, like, deep down– TIM: No. MARTIN: … Oh.

… But the others don’t seem to have tested these boundaries as far as we knew? Martin is unclear (although he mentioned feeling trapped in MAG039 and MAG117); we didn’t witness Melanie trying to actually flee (although Elias mentioned to Jon that “Even more than the others she has a visceral hatred of being trapped. Regardless of how much freedom I afford her.” in MAG102); and it had been pointed out how Basira hadn’t even tried:

(MAG095) MARTIN: Kinda thought your job was to be a hostage. […] Shouldn’t you be, I don’t know, trying to escape? BASIRA: Sure. How’s that gone for you? MARTIN: What? BASIRA: The way Tim tells it, we’re all in the same boat here. So, how’s your escape plan coming? [NOISES OF CONFUSED EXASPERATION] MARTIN: How… Doesn’t it bother you?!

(MAG112) DAISY: You’re getting comfortable with all those books. Don’t forget why you’re here. BASIRA: I know where I am, Daisy, and I know that I’m a prisoner. DAISY: And you want to escape. BASIRA: Yeah. But not on my own. We’re working on something. I’ll ask Melanie to fill you in.

And Jon himself was a weird case – he indeed fled the Institute at the end of season 2, but it was more… circumstantial? And he didn’t come back because he was getting sick like Tim?

- Oufffffffttt, Jon…

(MAG150) ARCHIVIST: Uh… [DOOR CLOSES] Of course, I was just, um… having a statement. MELANIE: Uh… an, an old one? ARCHIVIST: Wh– Yes, an old one! I’m not– I’m doing my best. MELANIE: … Sure.

… What is the definition of his “best”, here? Staying in the Archives and accepting to be tailed by the others…? That’s… better than (re)traumatising people, sure, but the contrast with how Melanie is doing her best (forcing herself to go through therapy and to go past her distrust, working on herself, deciding that she prefers to be dead rather than collaborating with a Fear-machine, putting efforts into going to tell Jon although we could hear that it was hard and they’ve never been best friends in the first place) is quite astounding, and it was really not surprising that she was absolutely unimpressed.

(To Jon’s credit: that also means forcing himself to Not Know, probably. But still: if he feels like he’s currently doing “his best”, what does it say about his current mental state, except that it’s… bad all over?)

- For once, I’m still not sure that I clearly understand the different meanings of the title! Herman’s was pretty forward (feeling like he was stuck in the suburb & in his life, getting stuck for real in a Lonely dimension without issue) and I’m guessing that it’s also a representation of Jon&co right now: stuck and unable to go anywhere, just condemned to… wait (is Jon waiting for the end of 2018? He said he was conscious that the year marked the Institute’s 200th anniversary, in MAG127); although, at the same time, Melanie is proving that choices and options are still possible.

Right now, we’re indeed in a strange situation where it feels like, unless another new crisis suddenly explodes at their face (Maxwell Rayner not actually dead-dead? Jon had mentioned seeing people with the pendants of the cult, shortly after he woke up from his coma) (Vast ritual? We haven’t heard anything about it) (other Beholding folks coming to prepare their ritual?) (Hunters going after the Institute?)… Martin is the only one currently able to move things forwards.

- Cheers: this episode marked the end of the penultimate quarter of the season… and of the series in general! … Now, we’ll be entering the last quarter. It. Feels. Weird (usually, at this point, you would have a clear idea of the end line in sight and, uh, I… have… no idea… what we’re heading towards… and I am absolutely confident that, whatever happens, it will make sense and will have been introduced for a long while. But right now, it’s only “something most likely awful coming” and just. Dread.)

Title for MAG151 was used by Peter, twice, so I’m expecting the episode to be about Martin meeting his “friend” and… getting some answers/leads. Whoever that friend is – but given how the title can serve as a Vast pun and/or be a reference to a camera, I would say that Simon Fairchild (the Fairchilds collaborated with the Lukases on the Daedalus project, one of Jon’s first cases as a researcher at the Institute was about him, Jon has jinxed it by spitting that he didn’t want to meet Simon ever, and Peter said his friend was currently out of the country when Jon pointed out in MAG124 that Simon apparently likes to travel…) and Mikaele Salesa (since Peter and him were at least acquaintances making bets together according to MAG066, and there is… that camera from Floyd’s statement…) are gaining a few points as likely suspects.

(Anil had mentioned that this episode could trend at number 1 on tumblr, too, and squints, if I had to guess at why an episode would be more likely to trend, it would… probably contain reveals (Martin meeting Peter’s friend would cover it indeed), but also “Jon & Martin meeting again” or “Peter and Elias actually in the same room for the first time”, so………………)