#i figured this would be the most relevant excerpt

[mxtxfanatic]

hey sorry if you've answered this before, but i often see people saying that during the sunshot campaign wwx was going around digging up graves, i always thought he used the abundant corpses from the war? when i see this it's usually followed with 'thats why the other sects were mad at him' which ik is extremely inaccurate and you have the best grasp on this novel out of everyone ive seen online, so i was wondering if they talk about where he gets the corpses from in the novel? tbh i need to reread it its been a while

No, Wei Wuxian really was digging up Wen graves during the war (I know, I got confused about this too, at some point), but literally no one on the side of the Sunshot Campaign cared. They even defended him doing so, going so far as to disparage Hanguang-jun for taking issue with it, and Wei Wuxian points out this hypocrisy when viewing Nie Mingjue's memories:

Someone spoke, “I think HanGuang-Jun only had a dispute with Wei WuXian because his methods were too unnatural. They say that HanGuang-Jun denounced Wei WuXian to his face, how he disgraced the corpses, how he’s cruel and loves to kill, how he forgot his original intentions, and so on. But over there, everyone’s talking about the battle of Jiangling. Wei WuXian is described in such an incredible way. I’d love see it for myself if luck allows it.” This person’s story wasn’t as bad as some others. The more exaggerated ones even told of how on the battlefield he and Lan WangJi fought with each other as they killed the Wen-dogs. In reality, back then, their relationship wasn’t as utterly incompatible as the rumors say, but there were some trivial clashes. At the time, Wei WuXian went around digging graves all the time, while Lan WangJi always chose the most vexing of vocabulary, such as how it wasn’t a righteous path and harmed both the body and the mind. He even straight up hindered Wei WuXian at times. What was more, they battled the Wen-dogs once every few days, both directly and secretively. Both of them were quite easily angered at the time, so they often parted on bad terms. Now, listening to others bring this up, Wei WuXian felt that it was a lifetime ago, though he suddenly remembered—it was indeed a lifetime ago. Someone spoke, “From my opinion, HanGuang-Jun really doesn’t have to do this. Even the living are close to being dead, so why should we care about those corpses?” Another person agreed, “Yes, we’re in harsh times, right? Sect Leader Jiang is right. In terms of evil or not, who’s more evil than the Wen-dogs? He’s on our side anyways. I say it’s fine as long as he’s killing the Wen-dogs.” Wei WuXian thought, Well, that wasn’t what you guys said when you brought the siege on me.

—Chapt. 48: Guile, exr

The cultivation world isn't mad that Wei Wuxian once dug up corpses. They're mad that he created a cultivation path that threatens their clan's relevance, prestige, and authority within the cultivation world, and since they couldn't steal the power for themselves, then "fighting evil" became the excuse to get rid of the "threat" while feigning righteousness:

One of the sect leaders spoke in a sour tone, “This time, Lotus Pier is really the center of the show. Almost all of the spirits and corpses were summoned to the YunmengJiang Sect’s grounds. There’d definitely be a number of cultivators interested in them.” Sect Leader Yao, “What could we do about it? Whose fault is it that our sects don’t have Wei WuXian’s?” “It’s not necessarily a good thing to have Wei WuXian. I don’t want there to be someone in my sect always stirring up trouble for me.” “Wei WuXian, he really is too bold... Anyways, from now on, I won’t attend any night-hunts that he’s going to.” Someone sneered, “Huh? Interested in them? I don’t think so. To put it simply, they’re interested in Wei WuXian, aren’t they? Didn’t the YunmengJiang Sect grow in fame during the Sunshot Campaign only because of Wei WuXian?”

—Chapt. 70: Departure, exr

Jin GuangShan, “Young Master Wei, we’ve brought this up a couple of times with you already. You haven’t forgotten, have you? ... During the Sunshot Campaign, you had once used a certain object.” Wei WuXian, “Oh. You did mention it before. The Tiger Seal?” Jin GuangShan, “It is said that the Stygian Tiger Seal was casted from the iron of a sword that you acquired in the cave of the Xuanwu of Slaughter. Back then, you used it on the battlefield once. Its powers were horrifying, causing even a few of our own cultivators to be affected by its residual force...” Wei WuXian interrupted, “Please get to the point.” Jin GuangShan, “This is the point. In the battle, apart from the Wen Sect, our sides undertook great losses as well. In my opinion, such a weapon is quite difficult to be controlled. For it to be in the hands of just a single person might be...” Before he even finished his words, Wei WuXian began to laugh. After a few laughs, he continued, “Sect Leader Jin, let me ask you something else. Do you think that, because the QishanWen Sect is gone, the LanlingJin Sect has all right to replace it?” All was silent within Glamor Hall. Wei WuXian added, “Everything has to be given to you? Everyone has to listen to you? Looking at how the LanlingJin Sect does things, I almost thought that it was the QishanWen Sect’s empire all over again.” Hearing this, over Jin GuangShan’s square-shaped face flashed a hue of embarrassed anger. After the Sunshot Campaign, the criticism of Wei WuXian cultivating the ghoul path that the sects had once veiled began to rise. He mentioned the Stygian Tiger Seal here intending to threaten Wei WuXian, reminding him that there was still something they held against him, that others were still watching him, and thus he shouldn’t be so bold as to want to climb above the LanlingJin Sect. Nobody expected Wei WuXian’s words to be so harshly straightforward. Although he’d held the quiet thought of succeeding the Wen Sect’s position since a long time ago, nobody had ever dared to bring it to the surface so fearlessly, going as far as to mock him.

—Chapt. 72: Recklessness, exr

[cheeseplants]

Fic: I'm Dreaming of a White (and Dark) Christmas

Want some Good Omens enemies to lovers Hallmark-esque fluff for Christmas? I hope so. Meeeerry Christmas.

Two shopkeepers with very different ideas about Christmas battle it out on Whickber Street to create the most extravagant Christmas lights in London.

Rating: G

Excerpt

He stood outside, absolutely beside himself, staring up at his creation. He breathed in deeply and said, “Let there be light.”

He chuckled to himself, as he flicked the switch.

The whole thing lit up in all its glory, the angels' halos giving an ethereal glow over the street. The baby Jesus shone brightly in his manger. Then, a beat later, the angels began to sing. This was the cherry on top of the full display.

Now as he had explained to Mr Brown, to get the effect he desired, the speakers needed to be placed around the street to give the full angelic presence. And if it so happened that the speaker he placed outside Crowley’s shop was louder than the others, then that was purely a mistake, one that could not be helped.

Aziraphale closed his eyes and listened as the voices bounced throughout the street. He breathed deeply. It was majestic.

A loud bang woke him up, and in the corner of his eye he saw that the florist door had swung open and there was the lanky figure standing in the doorway. His heart did a tiny flip. Crowley looked as if he hadn’t changed from his Halloween garb, so Aziraphale wondered if that was how he dressed all the time. He was still in black; he still had his sunglasses on. He wondered briefly if he still had those yellow eyes hiding underneath.

The music was blasting now as the chorus went into full swing.

Watching the figure in the doorway, Aziraphale could tell he was not pleased about this situation, and couldn’t help but feel a tiny grin trying to pull its way through the corners of his face.

Serves him right. If Aziraphale had to spend Halloween dealing with the rabble that he brought to the street, then Crowley would have to deal with an altogether more celestial issue.

Crowley stood in the doorway looking around until his face found Aziraphale. He stood for a moment cocking his head out of the doorway to take in what exactly was happening, and then began furiously walking towards Aziraphale. It was the most aggressive swagger that he had ever seen, and it left him with a strange sensation in his chest. He did not want to think about that right now.

“What the Hell is this?” Crowley yelled over the angelic choir that had gone up an octave.

“I thought, as you had your little display recently, I might do one of my own.”

“With music next to my shop?!”

“Well, it’s a lot better than screams, I can tell you that.”

“That was in my shop. I did not have people screaming in your shop.”

“You might as well have. This,” Aziraphale stood back to take it in again once more, “was agreed by the Shopkeepers Association, unlike your Halloween whatever it was. We agreed that the street needed a display for Christmas and I was more than happy to oblige.”

“The whole street agreed, eh?”

Aziraphale did not like the tone that came with that statement.

Crowley had done that thing again where he had relaxed into a position where one of his hips was slightly cocked outwards. Aziraphale sensed that this shift in posture meant something, and he sensed that something would not be very good.

The celestial chorus continued to blare loudly as the angels twinkled ahead. Crowley turned to the display in question.

“Very angelic…”

“I happen to like angels.”

“I bet you do,” Crowley gave one of those half smiles again, and Aziraphale felt the sides of his cheeks burn.

--

This is an older fic but is only relevant for like one month a year so I'm plugging it!

Thanks to @adverbian for beta-ing it many moons ago.

@goodomensafterdark

[vasito-de-leche]

;R1999 DIKKE - General Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons and analysis on Dikke as a character and other related things.

as promised, here's the Dikke post where I go deranged talking about her, since it was one of the two with the most votes in the poll <3

the other popular result was to talk about the parallels and use of racial issues within the story, how the game replaces actual racism for fantasy racism (arcanists vs humans) - so that one will deffo take me some time!

On the subject of justice and Dikke's inspirations.

I've seen some people say that Dikke is based on Joan of Arc, given her righteousness and religious themes - but there are so many more details about her design that point toward other figures!

Like, really. A lot of references to law and deities of justice all throughout history and different cultures.

The most obvious one is Dike, "goddess of justice and the spirit of moral order and fair judgement". In Dikke's interview with Pandora Wilson, they literally address her as "the goddess of justice". And a small statue of Lady Justice, the personification of justice that originates from Justitia (roman equivalent of Dike) can be seen in her insight 2 garment.

It goes without saying that Dikke's sword is another symbol representative of the previously mentioned figures - but to have only the sword and not the scales could have some implications about her way of imparting justice.

I would like to point out that Dikke's sword has these two dangling pieces that allude to the scales she's missing in her design. And sure, it might be a reach, but given how much detail and thought goes into the characters of the game and their designs, I really believe this is the case!

On Dikke's items, we also get the name and description for the sword.

The name alone leads me to believe that Dikke's weapon and its design represents both the sword and the scales of Lady Justice, it's the totality of justice itself. Dikke WIELDS justice, she ENFORCES justice, she IS justice. You're going to get really tired of me repeating the word justice in this post, but bear with me!

On the subject of swords, there are two swords mentioned all throughout Dikke's in-game profile and information. Her insight 2 garment is titled "Sword of Hamurabi".

This is evocative of something called the "Code of Hammurabi", one of the longest legal texts dating back to the first dynasty of Babylon. According to wikipedia, this stele it also depicts yet another deity of justice, Shamash. Wikipedia also makes note of the prologue within the Code of Hammurabi, in which the author - Hammurabi - claims to have been given these rules "to prevent the strong from oppressing the weak". This is extremely relevant to Dikke, as someone who fought hard for the rights of arcanists.

Pandora Wilson: I have heard many legends about you. The violent ghost of punishment, the crime-slaying sword of execution, the goddess of justice, the people's savior... Dikke: The desperate always need hope.

The stele of the Code of Hammurabi is ALSO relevant, because the artifact that follows Dikke around explicitly "belongs to some ancient stele". Yet another object that embodies justice and law.

I won't pretend I know anything about Babylonian culture or history in general, so anyone with more insight on this is welcome to add on to details and corrections!

The second sword mentioned can be found in the title for her 02 Story - "The Sword of Damocles".

This excerpt seems to be written by one of Dikke's coworkers, perhaps someone in a higher position of power since they mention being able to give others a day off. Overall, we're reading the thoughts of someone who is abusing their power and who does not think highly of Dikke.

"The story of Damocles is but a story" is something that Dikke herself says. At the end, there's a different phrase written and crossed out - "But the story of justice is not just a story".

Now, the anecdote of Damocles talks about how positions of authority and power are double-edged swords - a king may have all the riches and fortune in the world, but also be burdened with the anxiety of knowing there might be someone plotting against him. In the story, Damocles switches places with king Dionysus, to know what it's like to be a king, but to really make Damocles understand the position of king, a sword is placed above him - one that can fall and kill him at any moment.

With this in mind, Dikke's 02 Story becomes more clear - the first phrase is a warning given by Dikke herself to those in positions of power. The story of Damocles is a story, because not everyone will understand the consequences of being in a position of power. Not everyone will be given the opportunity to even reach such a position.

The author of the 02 Story is not a good person, only considering the idea of giving people HALF a day off, excluding those who work on the fields who will get nothing, refusing to lower taxes for the poor, and imprisoning someone who "interfered with the lord's land acquisition".

The sword of Damocles is also used to allude to the impending tragedy for those in positions of power, caused by the smallest of catalysts. So it makes sense to me that the final phrase, the one crossed out at the end, was either written by Dikke or alludes to the demise of this author at her hand.

And while we're at it, might as well talk about the last remaining item - her robes. Judges are required to wear these when working on trials, but Dikke is specifically stated to wear them outside of them - because she's always imparting justice. She's the opposite of Oliver Fog, she's always on the clock.

We haven't even gotten to another big aspect of Dikke's character - the fact that she's part of the Inquisition.

Without getting too much into actual historical events, the Inquisition as we know it focused on heresy and the conversion and persecution of Jews and Muslims. Within the game, this is recontextualized as a focus for arcanists instead. It's worth noting that her 01 and 02 Stories are written from the perspective of those who are in support of the Inquisition and its practices, or who profit from abusing their own power - hence the wording of "the Inquisition has been abused and considered evil by the ignorant."

There is an emphasis on how the Inquisition seeks power, while Dikke's final goal is justice.

This whole thing and yet another part from her interview with Pandora Wilson, is related to how Dikke associates herself with the corrupt and allows people to view her as a needlessly violent person for the sake of setting things right. On one hand, she could associate with the Inquisition and become a bishop to destroy corruption from inside out - on the other, she could acknowledge that to impart justice, one needs power because they're things that go hand in hand. The Inquisition is only able to have this much influence over trials for arcanists because of the common hatred towards arcanists throughout history.

The interview revolves around all the rumours surrounding Dikke, and we can see her showing distaste at the idea of cooperating with "what [she] shouldn't allow for the sake of justice" while at the same time, not denying her involvement with them. All the things she does are a means to an end.

Pandora Wilson: Does that mean you will cooperate with what you shouldn't allow for the sake of "justice"? Dikke: Fie. Pandora Wilson: Is that supposed to be a secret? Dikke: It sounds like we are talking about a conspiracy, yet it is but a means.

As for Dikke's own relationship with justice and her personal views outside of all the historical references used to create her character, I think this voiceline she has pretty much sums things up nicely.

Everything I doth… is so I may enjoy this calm wind on nights like this, rather than hear the sorrowful cries and moans of unhappiness.

She's a character that is strict in her ways and doesn't shy away from the darker aspects of life, such as the injustice arcanists have been subjected to for centuries. This extreme focus she has for upholding justice does cause Dikke to appear cold, and yet her ideals are almost childish, pure even - a world in which all misdeeds are punished and all good people are heard. Hell, her Ultimate literally purifies all negative statuses.

Dikke could easily lean towards righteous characters who exclusively see things as black or white, yet many of her voicelines and the origin of her devotion, show a very gentle heart. This is made clear by the fact that she's a healer.

Her two attacks and their names speak volumes about her own ways of thinking. Power is violent, power is not something that a judge should have so carelessly, but it is allowed in the name of "justice". Justice in quotations.

And then, actual justice is a rare occurrence, being merciful is not something that rules and the law take into account, but it's needed for those who cannot defend themselves.

On the subject of Dikke's backstory.

There's no resolution to this point, it just came up randomly while writing the previous one, because it just hit me that Dikke's Cover profile does not list where she was born. And that got me thinking about the fact that before settling down, she traveled all around Europe.

First of all, the Roman Catholic Diocese of Pamiers is an extremely specific location - one that has ties to the Inquisition, as a very important document regarding the Inquisition's procedures during a very specific trial was found there, as far as I know with my surface level research into history references. This document also talked about how, within this trial, the inquisitor and the bishop had "almost equal responsibility".

We can assume that this is the place where Dikke became bishop officially, if this was her final destination.

This starts to fall within headcanon territory, since it's mostly speculation, but I feel that the 02 Story takes place before she becomes bishop and settles in Pamiers - as a member of the inquisiton, she must've traveled all over Europe to do her job.

There might also be something related to the name mentioned, "Murville", but I don't have time nor the brain to start connecting the dots with actual french history. All in all, I like to think that Dikke was given the position of bishop as an attempt to distance her from, you know, killing every single corrupt person in a position of power by keeping her in a single place.

None of her voicelines give away anything about her life prior her entire journey of justice, as far as I can tell.

If we take Dikke's ties with Joan of Arc, maybe she was a common girl roped into things beyond her control. But I personally don't like the interpretation of Dikke's ideals being born from divine intervention instead of her own experiences, seeing the crimes committed against arcanists and realizing that she would like to do something about it.

Another option I'd like to explore about her background - maybe Dikke did have a relatively safe and normal childhood, away from the stigma and persecution. A nice, gentle life that she willingly gave up after she was confronted with the reality of the state of the world, without Jean of Arc's holy realization. To me, there needs to be an emphasis on Dikke's choice and decision to fight corruption. Making this dedication a result of "God told me to do this" would render her a little shallow - not to say religion cannot be part of her character, but in my opinion, Dikke is best when the focus of her moral compass is a genuinely care for the weak and the defenseless.

On the subject of Dikke and the loss of humanity.

Yes, that's THREE characters in a row that I analyze and that have themes of loss of humanity. There's just so many characters who've lost or given up their own humanity for the sake of something greater or something wicked.

Pavia's was a result of how he was mistreated and as a way to reclaim power, Forget Me Not's was a self-imposed torture originating from his inability to take responsibility. Dikke's seems to be self-imposed as well, but unlike the previous two, her loss of humanity is more of a sacrifice she makes for the greater good.

In her voicelines, we see that she leads a very strict schedule - she's straightforward and curt (but never impolite!) with Vertin, alluding to how simple justice is (if one commits a crime or abuses power, they shall be dealt with regardless of their social status) and how her body is "a representation of justice". Dikke has become a symbol for an idea, the concept of a fair system - she is no longer an individual but a savior, an executioner, a violent ghost, a witch, a threat, etc etc.

The loss of humanity is obvious in the way we do not get to know Dikke outside of any themes regarding justice. It's extremely hard to gleam any information about her childhood, her family, her interests and so on because they've all been displaced by this identity as justice itself. To me, this speaks about how power and responsibility on this scale will inevitably separate you from the people, THIS is the Sword of Damocles, now applied to Dikke as much as it applies to those in line for her judgement.

And yet, there are still very small hints of humanity left within her (still related, in a way, to her goals) in her care for the weak. Dikke's quote on her hobbies in a way reminds me of Sonetto.

The idle chatter of the people is entertaining, but 'tis more entertaining that they are always the first to know about the corrupt behavior of nobles.

Sonetto is a character that is similar to Dikke, in the sense that they both became the embodiment of concepts that ultimately stripped them off their individuality. Sonetto by fulfilling her training at the Foundation and becoming the PERFECT example of a military dog, a child martyr who struggles to connect with others because she was only taught how to exist FOR the Foundation. And Dikke, by all the things mentioned before.

But both of them have very endearing hobbies. Sonetto reads newspapers and collects them to find TYPOS IN THEM. Dikke's hobby is to listen to people talk as they go on about their day, not gossiping but to just listen to people exist.

In the main story, Sonetto's upbringing causes her to have a barrier with the people she truly wants to connect to (Vertin, namely) and Dikke's goal causes her life to revolve around a single thing, now only able to engage in mundane things from an outsider's perspective. She listens to people, she doesn't talk to them. She protects people, she doesn't live among them.

I like to think that, even so, this is when Dikke is most at peace. That she enjoys people watching, knowing they're safe and sound - because it validates all her efforts, it means that what she's doing is, in the end, worth it. This might also be why Dikke tells Vertin that they might be on the same path - Vertin, slowly figuring out the truth behind the Foundation and Manus Vindictae and acting as a saviour for those stuck in the middle.

As for headcanons, here's a couple I have!

Dikke has such a dry and deadpan sense of humour that only Vertin can understand it.

Sometimes, very rarely, Dikke will chime in with the most outlandish reply - straight out of the blue, spoken in the most serious and monotone voice. Those who aren't close to her will most likely brush it off as yet another intimidating thing they can't understand about her, but those close to her like Vertin?

It's THE funniest shit in the world and Dikke, who is very aware of the image and respect she commands, knows it.

Dikke and the artifact that follows her are friends.

Quite literally, that thing is the hand of justice. I like to think that Dikke can communicate with it non-verbally, even though it's implied that the artifact is not created by her arcanum.

Part of me likes to think that Dikke insists on said artifact being just her partner in her long journey of bringing justice to the world, but due to all the years spent together and all, the artifact itself (and whatever entity that shows up in her Ultimate) have come to see Dikke as their protégé.

[ninthprime]

severance 2x05 thoughts (spoilers)

i had kind of wanted the state of PE to be some sort of warped hudson valley/NJ area, because i’m familiar with and fond of a lot of the areas in which this show was filmed (i work a heavy travel job where my assigned territory happens to include most of them). but the mentions of grand rapids and milwaukee this season and the use of “wreck of the edmund fitzgerald” are increasingly convincing me of the theory that PE is what us americans know as michigan’s upper peninsula. i saw it proposed in a reddit comment ages ago, but it feels far more viable now. it’s snowy, full of trees, and very isolated- basically exactly what the town of kier is. (play some sufjan, you cowards!)

one thing i’ve grown to really appreciate over the course of this season so far is its dedication to simplicity- or more specifically, not overcomplicating things. occam’s razor if you will, as devon referenced in the second episode. consistently, i’ve seen viewers glom onto specific details and extensive theories when the actual answer is far more simple and straightforward. they’re gonna show dylan a fake family? nope, he meets his actual wife. burt and irving knew each other as outies? nah, their romance was entirely organic. how did all the outies agree to the ORTBO and leave afterward? it literally doesn’t matter! the best example of all to me is milchick’s storyline this season- i had wondered after the premiere if milchick was being purposefully messed with as part of some scheme, but it turns out he’s dealing with corporate racism, and that is far more resonant and relevant to what this show is commenting on than any sort of mystery box. this isn’t a show concerned with justification and details for every little plot point: this is a show concerned with its themes and ideas about personhood and social structures over pretty much anything else, and it’s willing to throw out the small shit for that. i keep seeing people try to connect every little detail in their theories and i think, frankly, we should be looking to downsize. the lives of these people are what matters, not that every single plot point is explained twice over.

with that in mind, despite the fact that i thought burt might be reintegrated just a few episodes ago, i’m now wondering if he’s completely genuine- or at the very least, not hostile as many people are speculating. the actual plot point we’re meant to focus on here is whether or not “love transcends severance” in burt and irving’s case, and what that tells us thematically for the story and about their outies as characters. the show is still being very restrictive about outie irving and what his deal is; my prediction is that the complication of the dinner might involve him self-sabotaging a potential new bond with burt and fields because he’s operating on such heavy suspicion of anything lumon related. (that or fields just isn’t happy with this situation which, frankly, is completely understandable.)

the ricken and devon storyline this season intrigues me because i see very little speculation on where it’s leading. i had assumed that ricken may have written the dieter story in 2x04 because of apple releasing the excerpt from the you you are before the episode premiered- basically a way of priming the viewer for that realization. but i think it would have been mentioned this week if that were the case. it certainly seems to be a “capitalism consumes even criticism of itself” story. (this show is funded and produced by apple and the writers seem to be aware of the layers of that, lol)

surprised i haven’t seen fellow theorizers focus on drummond briefly calling jame “father” yet. i think the most likely answer is that members of the figurative lumon cult just call jame “father” in general, but there’s a part of me that wonders if that indicates a certain amount of privilege by drummond- is this a sort of “beloved servant/assistant is adopted into the family” situation? it would explain a lot about helena if she knows she’s only the heir by her bloodline, and there are other “heirs” that jame likes and trusts a lot more.

mild trailer spoilers: there’s a shot of helly that seems to show her holding irving’s drawing of the exports hall elevator, so i suspect dylan and helly are going to bond over irving’s death and mark’s behavior (which is understandable to us and unclear to them) and dylan is going to let her in on what irving left behind- and maybe on the situation with gretchen, too. i would love to see the two of them investigating together. imagine them trying to explain the helena situation to O&D or MN.

at the beginning of this season, one of my remaining questions was “why does O&D need to be severed?” cool to see that answered, with the revelation that they make materials for the mysterious exports hall floor. i enjoyed seeing that elizabeth appears to have taken burt’s old position as one of the people allowed to roam the halls. and despite all the speculation about fields, my suspicion is that the guy picking up the materials is actually the “oswald” burt mentioned in season 1.

after 2x01 i made a joke about how there should be a compilation of wild milchick lines that tramell tillman delivers with absolute seriousness. i did not realize how unbelievably true that would be. there’s like five an episode

[frozenmorningstar]

@izar-tarazed left a letter, responding to this post ( still accepting ! ):

for the wip tag game: tell us more about Kiln of Reunions and The Griffin's Shame? 👀 (I love all those titles!)

Thank you for saying so about my titles! They are my pride and joy.

Kiln of Reunions is a Dark Souls III AU fic, where the children of Gwyn are the ones to put out the First Flame. It's multichapter but each chapter is a different stage of the fight with the Soul of Cinder... except I dragged it out to reflect that there are countless Souls that comprise it. Each chapter is named after a type of soul: Nameless Soul, Empowered Soul, Bequeathed Lord Soul, Lord Souls, Dark Soul, and Soul of Kindling. I think most of them are self explanatory, but the Dark Soul would have been a Chosen Undead that had touched each child of Gwyn's life at some point or another. Very angsty, especially because I decided they get to hear the thoughts of the immolated souls within the Soul of Cinder and see their final moments. Also, each 'phase' of the fight would have seen the Soul of Cinder glow different colors, with Gwyn being the color of the hottest fire, blue, to really sell that the First Flame is attempting with all its might to remain lit. I haven't worked on it in a bit but I do still want to finish it. Below is an excerpt from midway through the second chapter.

“…Loyal to the last, boy?” Her voice was heavy with emotions, and I wondered if she knew more of Master and his friends than I knew. I attempted to limp closer to Master’s beloved, but it was in that moment my strength failed me. I fell, half encircling Master’s grave, the kind Undead petting me as she had before. The dark swallowed me as something wet fell onto my eyes and then — He was standing on top of ash, whatever power that allowed him to see Sif’s final moments having been spent. The nameless king took several deep breaths, trying to figure out what had happened.

Slaps hands together You foolish fool. You absolute buffoon. I now get to yap about my beloved Griffin's Shame. It's a ASoIaF-inspired story that came to me while listening to Only Us by Miracle of Sound. It's evolved a lot over the years, in terms of everything but the general idea of the plot. As of right now, it takes place in a setting inspired by continental medieval Europe (with a focus on central Europe) that I'm calling Mittilgart at the moment. The main two characters are Leonadra Griefen (Griefen meaning 'griffin' in German if I haven't been lied to by the internet, hence the name) and Clais Vilinger (which is actually a disguise for one of my significant other's characters but shush), who are childhood friends. Leonadra is known as the 'Thrice Damned Kingslayer', due to her killing three kings: two foreign, one domestic. Due to Circumstances™️, Clais ends up as the emperor of (insert name of country here because I don't know where I put the relevant world building doc), and Leonadra is his marshal. The issue arises that Clais is extremely emotionally volatile and has a reign of terror as he seeks to get revenge on a world that had thoroughly mistreated him and taken pretty much everything he cared about away from him. This, understandably, puts pretty much every knightly vow that Leonadra has ever made to the sword as she has to chose between a close friend or her own morals.

She slowly comes to decide that she can only hold to the vow to protect her friend, even as the rest of the continent begins invading and everyone else tries to kill him. In the end, however, Leonadra is the one who kills him, becoming the Breaker of Four Crowns. She cradles his lifeless corpse as trebuchets rock the castle's foundation, leaving her fate as an unknown...

Specifically, the character of Leonadra is inspired by these lines from the linked song:

I'm no man of honor, my guilt runs dark and deep ; My oaths betray each other till there's nothing left to keep.

Griffin's Shame is also specifically designed almost as a microcosm, story wise: it begins and ends with Leonadra cradling the corpse of a royal that she respected. Otherwise I'm still tossing up how I want to actually tell the story. I've played around with the idea of writing it as a stageplay, maybe even one in parts, because I simply adore the stage. Otherwise it'd probably be another epic fantasy series, though I'd hesitate to say it would need more than three books to tell it fully. I'd envision two ideally.

(also fun fact: that setting houses my Jeanne d'Arc-inspired character that has schizophrenia but can also hear the voice of God and also has gigantism. Marie-Chardin Braquemont, my beloved <3)

Hopefully that sates your curiosity. If not, I am always happy to yap about my projects more.

[ausetkmt]

I first saw Bamboozled as a 15-year-old, in April 2001, at the Ritzy Cinema in Brixton, south-west London, and it threw me for a loop. Written and directed by Spike Lee, the film is an intense satire about a frustrated African American TV executive, Pierre Delacroix (Damon Wayans), who creates a contemporary version of a minstrel show in order to purposefully get himself fired, and expose the commissioning network as a racist and retrograde outfit. However, the show, which features its black stars wearing blackface, becomes a huge hit, prompting Delacroix’s mental collapse, and an explosion of catastrophic violence, the effects of which are felt far and wide.

In a fraught contemporary climate where the mediation of the black image in American society is at a crucial juncture, Bamboozled’s trenchant commentary on the importance, complexity and lasting effects of media representation could hardly feel more urgent. Each time an unarmed black person is killed, then hurriedly repositioned in death as a thug, a brute, or a layabout by mainstream media outlets – as has happened recently to Trayvon Martin, Michael Brown, Eric Garner, Samuel DuBose and countless others – we are seeing the perpetuation of old anti-black stereotypes, forged in the crucible of mass American art, reconfigured for our time.

Lee’s film traces a grim continuum between stereotypes old and new, connected by knotty skeins of institutional racism. Many critics at the time of the film’s release suggested that Lee had needlessly reopened old wounds; that the dark days of minstrelsy were comfortably behind us, and that we should move on. Yet Lee’s vision was not only necessary, it proved remarkably prescient. During the course of writing this book, I rewatched episodes of garish reality TV shows like Flavor of Love (2006-8), starring the clock-wearing rapper-cum-jester Flavor Flav, and The Real Housewives of Atlanta (2008-). I had to concede that Bamboozled’s nightmarish New Millennium Minstrel Show didn’t look so far-fetched after all. I sat gape-mouthed in front of Lee Daniels and Danny Strong’s musical soap opera Empire (2014-) – a wildly entertaining but exceedingly dubious carnival of black pathologies – and couldn’t help but wonder if it was the type of show that would get Bamboozled’s master-wigger network boss Dunwitty (Michael Rapaport) hot under the collar at proposal stage.

When, in October 2014, I saw footage of freshly signed rapper Bobby Shmurda literally dancing on a table in front of a group of executives, exactly like performer Manray (Savion Glover) does in Bamboozled, I began to wonder whether Lee was in fact a secret soothsayer. Not even he, however, could have predicted the transcendentally weird tale of Rachel Dolezal, the NAACP leader in Spokane, Washington, who was revealed to have been white, and posing as African American all along. At the time of the incident, many wags on social media suggested that Lee would be the ideal man to direct Bamboozled 2: The Rachel Dolezal Story.

Bamboozled’s shrewd commentary on the lack of behind-the-scenes diversity in mainstream entertainment is also especially relevant today. The presence of figures like Robin Thede – head writer on The Nightly Show With Larry Wilmore, and the first black woman to hold that position on a late-night network comedy show – and Shonda Rhimes, the powerful showrunner behind Grey’s Anatomy, Scandal and How To Get Away With Murder, is heartening. Yet a report released in March 2015 by the Writer’s Guild of America West revealed that minority writers accounted for just 13.7% of employment: a dismal statistic. Moreover, Rhimes’s success didn’t insulate her from being disrespectfully branded as an “Angry Black Woman” – that most pernicious of stereotypes – in a rancid, supposedly flattering article by Alessandra Stanley in the New York Times

While most of us can cheer the incrementally increasing diversity on our film and television screens, Bamboozled forces us to question the quality and progressiveness of these roles. Ostensibly it’s great that talented actors such as Mo’Nique (Precious, 2009), Octavia Spencer (The Help, 2011) and Lupita Nyong’o (12 Years a Slave, 2013) are winning Oscars, but isn’t the shine taken off somewhat by the fact they were rewarded by the establishment for playing, respectively, a psychotic “welfare queen”, a neo-Mammy in a white savior period picture, and a chronically abused slave? Why don’t black women win Oscars for playing complex heroines or crotchety geniuses like their white male counterparts? Because old stereotypes die hard within an industry that prefers stasis over change. Perhaps even more disturbingly, there’s something inherently soothing about such stereotypes for mass audiences – a point particularly relevant to the wild popularity of Bamboozled’s own minstrel show.

And how far have we come, really? Ridley Scott cast a host of white actors (including a fake tan-enhanced Christian Bale and Joel Edgerton) in his Middle Eastern epic/flop Exodus: Gods and Kings (2014), but his response to complaints was both flippant, and distressingly matter-of-fact: “I can’t mount a film of this budget, where I have to rely on tax rebates in Spain, and say that my lead actor is Mohammad so-and-so from such-and-such. I’m just not going to get it financed. So the question doesn’t even come up.” The best riposte to Scott and his film came from independent black film-maker Terence Nance, who wrote that “[l]ike The Birth of a Nation before it, [Exodus] traffics in absurd cultural appropriation and brown-faced minstrel casting/makeup techniques to rewrite African history as European history, and in so doing propagates the idea that European cultural centrality is more important than historical fact and the ever-evolving self-image of African-descended people as it is influenced by popular representations of people of color in Western media distributed worldwide.”

Nance, however, is just one talented black film-maker among many (Dee Rees, Tina Mabry, Haile Gerima, Julie Dash, Barry Jenkins et al) who have struggled to attract funding to tell artistic and personal stories outside of the monolithic, corporate world of mainstream entertainment which Bamboozled so acidly depicts (even if it is set in the world of TV rather than film.) Lee has long been vocal about the struggles he’s faced in raising funds to tell black-focused stories, and even he had to go cap in hand to fans on Kickstarter to crowd-fund his idiosyncratic, low-budget vampire movie Da Sweet Blood of Jesus (2014). Da Sweet Blood is his most excessive, least easily readable work since Bamboozled, but it can’t match his earlier film for sheer visceral impact.

Bamboozled, then, is a genuine one-off, but I can detect traces of its relentless, irritable, questioning approach in a variety of contemporary art. I see it in Justin Simien’s excellent college-set satire Dear White People (2014), which was inspired by horrific, real-life blackface parties at universities across America. I see it in the antic situational comedy of Key & Peele, whose best sketch, musical spoof “Negrotown”, compresses the madness, pathos and insight of Lee’s film into four-and-a-half harrowingly hilarious minutes. I see it in Branden Jacobs-Jenkins thrillingly audacious play An Octoroon (2013), which reconfigures blackface tropes in daring ways. Most of all I see it coursing through the veins of Paul Beatty’s scabrous satirical novel The Sellout (2015), about a shiftless young black Angeleno who hatches a plot to reintroduce racial segregation, and takes an elderly slave – a disturbed former “pickaninny” star of Little Rascals films – while he’s at it. Like Lee’s film, it plays as a shotgun blast to the face of formal convention, it’s stubbornly resistant to a single concrete interpretation, and it has a lot of very painful things to say about America today.

ABC’s enjoyably gentle sitcom Black-ish (2014-), meanwhile, simultaneously echoes Delacroix’s crisis – with its premise of a middle-class black ad executive (Anthony Anderson) jockeying for position in a white corporate space – and feels like the kind of show Delacroix, free of Dunwitty’s pressure, might have concocted himself.

Lastly, I couldn’t help but think of Bamboozled while poring over Ta-Nehisi Coates’s epic essay in the Atlantic, The Case for Reparations, which uncovers, in forensic detail, the institutional plunder of black Americans from slavery to redlining to mass incarceration and its destructive impact on families. Coates’s fury is more controlled than Lee’s, but it’s equally sincere, and his essay shares with Bamboozled the central imperative to look directly into the heart of past racial sins in order to plot a productive way forward.

It is time, then, to take a close look at Bamboozled, which deserves to be respected as much more than a mid-career oddity in Lee’s filmography. It is a vital work that’s equal parts crystal ball and cannonball: glittering and prophetic, heavy and dangerous.

[rivalsforlife]

if you'rs still up for it i'd love to learn about dadworth epic and/or deep dark secrets 2 ?? also i have to say i loved that excerpt you posted of musical phoenix and how you perfectly made him such an asshole to maya lol

I'm always happy to do these!! (and thank you! why did the musical write him like that. why did they destroy my best friends.)

dadworth epic was SUPPOSED to be a super long (why it's not finished) plotty fic diverging from the end of The Forgotten Turnabout, except Kay doesn't get her memories back. Since she doesn't get her memories back, Edgeworth doesn't investigate the storage room to get the call from de Killer and therefore doesn't get sucked into the Grand Turnabout, and decides to take in Kay until she gets her memories (which doesn't happen for a whiiile). Without Grand Turnabout being resolved a bunch of bad things happen (Justine hands down the not-guilty for Patricia Roland, but subsequently is arrested for the fake president's murder - Ray manages to get her off the hook but the true culprit isn't found, Lang still suspects John but he's never convicted for it - Sebastian is kidnapped and not rescued for days and his faith in himself/others is totally shattered, it takes longer for John to get rescued so though he isn't dead he has some permanent frostbite damage from the freezer plus extra trauma, and of course Simon gets away with everything.) Basically everyone is worse off except the villains for most of this AU.

Also in this AU since Edgeworth doesn't go through his realization of wanting to become a prosecutor, he ends up becoming a defense attorney. This overlaps with disbarment so Phoenix has this weird jealousy thing going on where it's like "yeah I only became a defense attorney to save him and it's great that he's following his childhood dreams now But." Also Franziska and Gumshoe are taking this badly since they see Edgeworth as a defense attorney as a betrayal of his relationships with them (which is a thought I've elaborated on elsewhere).

Either way since Edgeworth still knows Too Much, he eventually gets assassins sent after him and Kay (I don't think I fully decided if this would be Patricia, Blaise, or Simon via Gustavia Proxy) and they go to de Killer, who, still feeling in Edgeworth's debt, refuses the request and warns him. He and Kay go on the run. This includes temporarily tagging along with the circus (to bring Simon into relevancy again), going to Zheng Fa (to introduce everything Lang's got going on and summarize the president's death related parts of Grand Turnabout), joining with Interpol (to handle the Franziska&Miles relationship drama), reuniting with Justine, John, and Sebastian, who are also on the run (dealing with fallout of this AU on their characters), then of course they have to take down Patricia, Blaise, the assassins going after them, and Simon (which is where I got lost because I was struggling to figure out How to do all that). They don't have enough evidence to arrest Simon on in the end, and it gives Edgeworth a career crisis again.

And of course throughout the whole thing is the focus on Edgeworth&Kay where Kay is first amnesiac and scared, then slowly gets more comfortable with Edgeworth and a bit more like her old personality, and at some point she does get her memories back but doesn't say anything because she wants to stay with him.

AS YOU CAN TELL IT WAS GOING TO BE VERY LONG. I HAVE NOT WORKED ON IT SINCE 2020. The outline was pretty detailed though so I miiight be able to pick it up again if I'm in the mood for it but I wouldn't count on it.

Deep Dark Secrets 2 is a much shorter explanation it's pretty much just me rewriting my fic that already exists but fully from Iris's perspective. So it was mostly a writing exercise kind of thing, it's mostly disjointed scenes, lots of them are flashbacks to her relationship with Phoenix and her interactions with Dahlia around that time.

[aviswriting]

Auvunaut - Introduction and Time Travel (first stage)

Here’s a brief scrap of a concept I wrote down for my Auvunaut story.

But first, what exactly is “Auvunaut?” The basically means Time Traveler, or sailor, since “naut” is the Latin of sailing (think nautical). The idea is that there’s a group of people who are like astronauts but for time. Pretty cool, right?

My problem, however, is that I created a world and a concept but no story to work it into. Here are some brief story concepts, none of which I particularly love -

1. Someone dies - someone was killed in the Current and they, as a ghost with their sliver of time, must figure out who killed them as well as how to get back to the Current. 

2. The tech being sold to Idk fantasy Russia and spies and assassins using time travel to their advantage 

3. The story of someone using the tech to re-live the past again and again and again, unable to escape that moment, until their perception of reality slowly melts away as unknown brain damage short-circuits neural networks 

4. Psychedelic dream realm where people live in a perpetual set amount of time - from this date to whatever was most Current at the time the development explosion happened. 

5. A scientist attempting to break into the future and the unrest surrounding the inner dealings and politics…. 

6. A scientist (change?) trying to go FAR into the past 

7. Misc sorta. Just trying to explore the Walking Paths…. 

What on earth do I mean by “Current,” “Walking Paths,” etc?

Here’s a brief excerpt from a rant I wrote (it’s in text speak sorry I’ll organize these ideas later) –

You can only go in the past and not the future because time is like, say, a really big path (relevant) that is always gaining new bricks and you can walk on the bricks that already exist and you can observe the bricks being placed but are not allowed to step where there are no bricks. The tech works kinda three fold and I’m still figuring out a lot of technical stuff so some things may change and be added onto but this is it - The three parts are the Current, the Walking path, and the Past. The Current is most soonest point in time - what’s going on currently obviously lol. The Walking path is where you go from the Current the Past - with this device that everyone has, you can choose intervals of time to travel by. So, an example would be, you select segments of time on the device by weeks. Doors on the side of the Walking path will appear with weekly intervals. The longest intervals you can have are 3.14 months. Two questions spring from this - How do you go from the Current to the Walking path and why is the interval amount limited? First question: What basically happens is the tech will take your consciousness apart from yourself but only a little bit - so you become a ghost, basically, and if you walk through the nearest door, that’s where the magical misty dirt brick wood- whatever, path will be with the aforementioned doors. Your Current body is still connected though, since it’s only a lil part of yourself that the tech removed, so it moves as your Ghost body moves - so people will have specific safe rooms where they can time travel in, OR it will be a gov. regulated thing Idk how much though I actually am still asking questions about that myself but let’s just assume that people use it really regularly and they even have special rooms for this sort of thing. This brings us to the next question - as well as where my technical problems are. xD The more time you spend messing about with time travel, the more your Ghost self will become your True self. What do I mean by this? Well, it’s a function of how far you walked, the amount you’re able to walk depending on how long or short the time intervals are, and how much time you spend in the Past. What happens to your Current body is it will slowly dissolve into Antimatter as your Ghost gains more and more matter. Ofc only a little bit is fine - your body is restored once the two selves become whole again.

[starwarspissorgy]

To anyone who continues to support Biden at this time, I have a request in the spirit of calm, rational, timely debate. I would like you to read Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.'s entire Letter from Birmingham Jail, right now. I imagine there is a very high chance most of you have read at least excerpts from it in school and discussed it before, but I am requesting that you take ten minutes to do so once again today. I further request that you spend some time asking yourself, if you apply the ideas in this letter to the conflict today, do they support your position or not?

I want you to pay attention, not just to the most quoted lines about how an abstract "white moderate" is detrimental to the cause of black liberation, but to the entire letter as it describes the white moderate and other detrimental groups.

I'd draw special attention to the passage about this myth of time, that "Actually, time itself is neutral; it can be used either destructively or constructively. More and more I feel that the people of ill will have used time much more effectively than have the people of good will." While there have been many hard-fought victories, the distance in time since this was written is mostly irrelevant, as time does no magical work to change reality, and those hard-fought victories are just the material changes they effected; there is no weaseling out of this letter by saying that times have changed. The ideas are as relevant as ever.

I'd further draw special attention to the passage about condemning peaceful actions for the violent reactions they cause. When reading this passage, how do you think the ideas apply to people asking others to continue to support the establishment in fear of a worse one?

And if you're going to respond, I want you to respond to the ideas in the letter itself. This is not about "who would Dr. King support?" This is not about using a mythologized figure as a token in an argument. This is about how this letter puts better than I can the ideas that are informing my disdain for those who continue to support Biden right now.

PDF:

Plain text:

[sunstranded]

INTJ: Convincing

I have been told to be quite fearsome. I do not like it. All I want is respect. Mutual acknowledgement and constant challenges. I suppose this also contains a short excerpt about that one time I... as they would call it... fell for someone... though I'd rather call it a series of "idk what the hell I'm doing and I think I'm okay with that for once"

I suppose playing with suspense would be fun. I won't disclose what type I thought they were until the end (given it wasn't any of our interests at that time, I can only assume now).

I digress. Now towards fear, I actually dislike being feared nowadays. When I was younger, I froth it. Something about instilling fear with just a stare and if they're lucky, a few words, into any person is fun. Especially since I have been cursed to be born with the ultimate baby face. For years I have been tortured to this inane cuteness aggression of my peers. Hence, I wanted to instill fear and I was successful. When maturity has finally made my baby face less inviting to cuteness aggression, I was the person to fear and admire at the same time. I suppose still being somewhat cute and tomboyish alongside being smart but not smart enough for the system to be at the top constantly makes you a little less untouchable and a little more desireable. Especially since I did enjoy service work a lot. Helping people is fun.

I somehow feel that this is such an inane plot twist for an INTJ. Given our stereotype makes us this villain or whatever. Amusing, how I managed to keep digging myself deeper into this hole.

I suppose it is useful for me to finally admit that. Afterall, I am now truly unbothered by it and it gives good insight as to why I have intertwined fear and respect. Now I am sick of being so fearsome because I miss the times I was in the penumbra of both fear and respect, there are those that acknowledged me enough as equals and not tools at their disposal.

It was... a time in an academic institution where I truly felt like I was not letting time just pass. I did recognize how I felt—I was not a means to someone's ends, that I wasn't instrumental— that I was an equal worth challenging. I felt most alive at those times. It was the rivalry people in the classroom can't help but join in with bets and jokes. It was humorous, we didn't get to show that rivalry as often as I would have liked because we both learned early on that we work so well together.

After some time, I decided to court them and we were a thing until we weren't. There was really not much to it. I mean, the allure of being the jaded and misunderstood villain is to bring them to what is deemed as the good side and failing to do that just makes any relationship awkward. I am speaking metaphorically instead of personally by choice, I hope it is not too confusing.

In my vague and selective memory they were ENxJ or INFx. I could be very well wrong here, my interpretations are outdated and most likely skewed by time. Do with that as you will.

Anyway, back to the relevant matters. Those experiences constitute the reason why I do not want to be feared or loved in a public figure's sense (because I was considered relevant in a sense back in the day). I just want respect, acknowledgement, and most importantly challenges.

There is no thrill in being feared into thinking I am always right, I need to be on my feet with challenges. I also often think I could be improved or fully wrong about something. There is also no real reason for me nowadays to be loved or admired. Not that reason really holds value in something that sustains our emotional faculty and imperative to belong and be understood. Mostly I just haven't been convinced that I need someone else in a romantic sense to fulfill that human requirement. But I suppose love would be a loaded word for people but it is possible the most overused, redundant, misconception of a concept ever.

People would call you wise for acknowledging that love is a constant choice but life is also a constant choice. It is not wise to acknowledge a nature of something; it is wise to respect that nature. But then again people are convinced by the world in really preposterous ways and I cannot blame them for critical thought has been reserved as a privilege not a right.

I am not saying they're stupid, but the world has been too harsh on them that it is hard to fathom that they're more than one adjective. In a sense, being cute or being fearsome were adjectives that convinced me too. That I needed those to be who I am. That those are all I could be.

I also could have just went the friendship route but I already talked about all I want to talk about in that regard.

[emustockings]

I have a pet interest in religions, and this little bit of writing struck me as a fantastic image for exploring the subtle but no less insidious ways imperial powers construct "truth". Other times it's not so subtle at all of course, but what's described in this excerpt feels very relevant to a lot of well-meaning leftists within our own spaces. From Catherine Keller's On The Mystery, which is a book on Christian theology but specifically about reconciling the faith from a leftist perspective in the context of American right-wing extremism... I say all this for the comfort of anybody reading who has a heavy allergy to Christianity lol So you can either stop reading here or be like "ok as long as it's not bigots."

"What is truth?" Thus the Roman legate [ie Pontius Pilate] retorts in his exasperation with the difficult Jew before him [ie Jesus] (John 18:38). He asks the best of questions--if only he were actually asking. It would become possibly the world's most famous rhetorical question, uttered with the world-weary shrug of one accustomed to moral contradictions and religious extremists.... The Bible in its living context can only be understood "in the light of an omnipresent, inescapable and overwhelming sociopolitical reality--the reality of empire, of imperialism and colonialism, as variously constituted and exercised during the long period in question." From Egypt and Babylon, on to Greece and Rome, Israel was engulfed by globalizing cultures based on the involuntary coexistence of multiple ethnicities and their deities. Imperial order demanded a de facto pluralism uncharacteristic of prior, more local or tribal, unities. The fierce particularism of the Jews, especially when it irrupted in the anti-imperialist fervor of messianic movements, posed special problems for Roman stability in the region. And it also threatened the local elite, the class of rulers which in that colony, as in all nations subject to colonial rule or neocolonial dependence since, benefits from collusion with the imperial overlords. So, then, what "truth" could the difficult figure before Pilate signify under such circumstances? ... [We] feel the lashing irony of Pilate's question. It encapsulates the pluralism of indifference. It recognizes the differences of peoples, their gods, and their truths--with a shrug. It tolerates them as long as they remain "politically innocuous." But there was uncertainty about this case. So with a rhetorical shrug he tortures Jesus before handing him over to crucifixion. ... The Digest of Justinian summarizes succinctly the Roman policy: "By torture we mean the infliction of anguish and agony on the body to elicit the truth." So it seems that beneath the indifference to truth, a different approach to the truth and its confession is operating. This "truth" would be information you could extract from another, a proposition you could abstract from the quivering flesh, from the anguish and the resistance. Indeed, the ability to transcend the pain of your victim in the interest of truth would mark you as superior, rational, civilized. .... Might we recognize in the tortuous truth an extreme instance of every totalizing absolute? For doesn't every notion of a truth that can be demanded or commanded top-down finally threaten to extract its confession through torture--whether now on earth or later in hell? Such a "truth-regime" (Foucault) brooks no uncertain terms, no slant: a simple yes/no, either/or proposition is exacted. .... "Empire," writes Joerg Rieger of both Rome and the present one, "presents its own claims to truth even if, as in the contemporary embodiments of the postcolonial empire, often in hidden fashion."

[transienturl]

tumblr's formatting is a pain but posting this excerpt from a thread with someone who's trying to make use of my (old, bad, but working) guild wars 2 optimization code

my problem with, like. life in general. is that, you know, these problems are interesting to talk about and potentially maybe solve. but like. you can only do one thing if you spend this much time on the thing, or even on talking about how the thing could maybe be done with an immense time investment

me:

some difficulty initially did come from—let's do another simple example: viper or sinister, bursting or smoldering. the optimizer used to start at "all viper" and end at "all sinister," which meant that you would see all bursting builds in the beginning and all smoldering at the end. this both made a theoretical heuristic removing options that did not wind up anywhere close to the top n not work, and from a practical user perspective made you need to wait a long time to feel like you knew roughly the right build

I changed it to start with, in this case, viper-sinister-viper-sinister-viper-sinister etc, and it changes one gear piece per run. this relatively quickly covers most of the possibility space for gear, which means that after the first few seconds in many cases, you see the sigils and runes become relatively static; at that point pruning every non-viable sigil and rune feels reasonable

but when you enable many options, like 4-5 affixes, a) getting to the point where every rune/sigil combo has filled much of the probability space can take a while (minutes+), and b) sometimes the optimal build really is fairly unique, particularly if you have something like a minimum boon duration set

if you do concentration or bursting; ritualist or viper or [options here] with a minimum boon duration that winds up being all ritualist, until you actually run 100% ritualist, busting sigil will never show up on the top n list because every single other build requires concentration (but you do not want to cut it off, as it's actually the optimal build)

these problems should all be solvable, I'm fairly certain, at least to a degree, but I didn't put that much work into experimenting with better algorithms because keeping up with patches to keep the current system working took/takes so long lol

so anyway tl;dr I didn't figure out an obvious way to make it fast enough that you could just enable the entire list of potentially relevant options

(the other person I'm working with):

true

we need some pog A* then for sure

when you getting to it

me:

my main idea for a speedup was: every combination of gear is some percentage affix a, some percentage affix b, some percentage affix c, etc. rather than using the actual permutations of the affix options, find the optimal percentage of each affix for any given combination of runes and sigils. this should be very easy computationally; I think it's just gradient descent

then, find a way to enumerate every combination of gear that is within n% of the optimal mix, and exhaustively calculate damage for every one

I'm pretty sure it would work, but I don't have the math background to code gradient descent on an n-dimensional space, I don't have an obvious idea about how to enumerate combinations close to a certain mixture (math again), and most importantly, gw2 equipment items don't actually match up that closely with "a backpack is 1.2% of your stats so add 1.2% of full viper" and I don't know if that would be enough to screw it up

but if someone with the math and coding background wanted to try it, I would love to know if it works lol

anyway all of that aside, I think one of the gear optimizer's primary assets is its UI for selecting options, given that we do at least currently need to only select relevant ones, and I don't know if that's worth taking advantage of or if there's a good enough way to do it as just a server app

[mahdithemagician]

The Magical Atmosphere

The following is an excerpt from Pipo Villanueva's blog.

“MAGIC BEGINS WITH RESISTANCE, AT THE POINT WHERE RESISTANCE IS OVERCOME.”

It was that night in Madrid of 1954 when everything changed. I was not there but I’ve heard the tale many times and I’ve recreated it in my mind many more. The great Fred Kaps (1926-1980) was there performing a clandestine close-up session for a little crowd. They were deeply captivated, surrounding him squashed in like sardines trying to get a good view of the improvised stage. There was a special thing floating in the air, it was as if that night at that very place nothing were impossible.

Home video of Arturo de Ascanio's weekly tertulia (informal sessions). You can spot a very young Miguel Angel Gea. Who else do you recognize?

A young Spanish stage magician was in the audience, Arturo de Ascanio (1929-1997), later he would become a master of the art and one of the most relevant figures in magic too. That night Fred Kaps turned Arturo’s world upside down and changed his life forever, and with it the life of many others that would come later. Arturo abandoned stage magic and focused in close-up magic, trying to understand what he experienced and how it was possible to recreate it. He became a very successful lawyer and an extremely cultivated person, magic was never his day job but his passion and obsession. The quest for the “Magic Atmosphere” would accompany him all his life. Arturo theorized, conceptualized and put into words the empirical knowledge of the magicians laying the foundations of the so called Spanish School of Magic inspiring magicians from all over the world to this day.

“MAGIC ATMOSPHERE: The magical atmosphere (and I do not pretend that the concept is new) is the feeling of magic, surprise and mystery that is achieved when the magician executes his effects so that the spectators cannot see, let alone suspect, the secret cause that produces them. The spectators DO NOT SUSPECT even the EXISTENCE of that cause, and the series of effects always catch them totally unprepared. That is to say, the magical atmosphere occurs when, in a sequence of effects everything happens as if the authentic magic really existed. Effects and emotions develop so naturally and so unexpectedly that the effects produced are really mind-boggling. Conceived in this way, the magical atmosphere is the SUMMUM of perfection to which every magician can aspire.” - Arturo de Ascanio, 1958

Arturo would also become close friends with Fred Kaps and years later would remember his experience that night like this:

“I was totally dazzled, shocked. This was something else, it was impossible to think that could even exist…”

That was how two legends wrote a great episode of the history of magic.

Read the rest of Pipo's blog entry here: http://pipovillanueva.com/january-2017-arturo-ascanio-the-magic-atmosphere/

MAGIC AS A PLACE

Everyone has an inner world. Some inner worlds are richer than others. The world of magic is very deep and the role of the magician is to get the audience to choose the leave their own world and enter into the magician's inner world. This inner world is one that is abundant with possibilities, contradictions, and impossibilities. When the magicians enters the scene he is entering everyone else's world and those worlds are not magical worlds, in fact, those worlds are hostile to magic. In those worlds the impossible stays impossible.

INFILTRATE. DESTABILIZE. CO-OPT.

The role of the magician is to destabilize the audience. This is accomplished through the opening effects which are designed to undermine what the audience knows about the rules of the game. Once the audience understands that strange things are happening the magician co-opts them.

HOW?

THE AUDIENCE IS ASKED A QUESTION.

THEY DON'T RECOGNIZE IT AS A QUESTION BECAUSE THEY ARE ASKING IT TO THEMSELVES.

FRED KAPS DE GOOCHELAAR

(Dutch for THE MAGICIAN)

The question is a question that they know the answer to. They know the answer in two ways. They know the answer that would be correct in the real world and they know the answer that would be correct if they were seeing real magic.

Imagine a spectator is asked to select a card. They select the 5 of Spades, signs the card, and loses it in the middle of the deck. Where is the card? Somewhere in the middle. The magician passes the shadow of his hand over the deck explaining that this makes the signed 5 of Spades rise right to the very top of the deck. The magician asks the spectator to turn over the top card which she does and finds her signed card in her hand having been mysteriously risen through the whole pack. Again, the magician asks her to place her card anywhere she would like in the deck, which she does. The magician asks her where her card is and she responds that it's lost somewhere in the middle. The magician nods, raises his hand over the deck and mysteriously passes his shadow over the deck. He asks her where her card is. The deck hasn't moved. Nothing has seemingly happened but now she has two answers to that question. Both are based in observation and expectation. She knows she lost the card in the middle of the deck and she knows that when the shadow of the magician's hand passes over the deck that her signed 5 of Spades will inexplicably rise up to the top of the deck.

The audience's world has been infiltrated and destabilized. The magician's world has been introduced and it's principles observed. The audience now has a choice to make.

WILL THEY CONTINUE TO RESIST

OR

ENTER INTO THE INNER WORLD OF MAGIC?

Not everyone will enter and all who do will come in their own way. 

Fred Kaps would serve as a mentor to Ascanio and young Arturo would eventually create and improve many classic plots in magic. Fred Kaps and Arturo de Ascanio are highly revered by magicians aspiring to excellence worldwide. The Magic of Ascanio is published by Páginas Libros de Magia and contains many essays, techniques, and material from Arturo de Ascanio.

[thatswhatsushesaid]

While I do sympathise and agree that many of the ‘immoral’ thing JGY did were a direct response to others attacks on him, for survival and family normal or pragmatic behaviour (I honestly didn’t blame him for the incest at all, I agree there was nothing to be done; and I’m glad JGS died) I have some questions. Especially since you and another user mentioned that him being in power was better for more people (that he did things that benefitted others and him as a side effect too) - then how does one reconcile with what happened to the Tingshan He sect? And even the gamble he takes on JZX’s life by sending him after JZixun? That seems like self serving ambition…

Honestly, anything JGY did to get around or harm JGS and even NMJ, I agree. While one was better than the other, I don’t think either of them were great leaders, nor were they always reasonable, and he was likely a better leader than them.

(Also, I’ve heard varying accounts about the watchtowers being useful/useless, good intentioned and not, can you please point me towards the chapter that makes that clear?)

Thanks

hey anon, sorry for taking such a long time to respond to you! I believe that I answer most of the questions you raise here in my reblog over here, but I'll try to pull out the salient points for you in my reply. fwiw I'm not going to dig down into the jgy-jzx stuff because I think @lansplaining did a great job of that already over here, but my tl;dr version for myself is that I just think mdzs-jgy was mad, made a bad judgment call, and assumed that wwx would have more control over wn than he did.

okay, now to address the rest of your ask:

the tingshan he

the first thing to remember about the tingshan he is that jgy is demonstrably not in power when this sect is brought to xy's demonic cultivation wonderland. jgs is still the jin sect leader. I bring this up because I think it's important to acknowledge that the tingshan he were going to die whether jgy was present to serve as death's ferryman or not. their fates were sealed as soon as they began actively agitating against jgs's desire to establish the position of chief cultivator. here's the relevant sections I highlighted from the villainous friends extras:

as I pointed out in my linked reblog, what this shows us is two things: 1) jgy began with diplomacy and negotiation to try to bring the tingshan he to heel, and I believe we can reliably trust that this is true; if it weren't, he su would have protested this as a lie; and 2) in he su's own words, the tingshan he were prepared to oppose jgs's desires with violence.

however, anon, if you're hoping I'll write something here that will thoroughly cleanse the figurative blood of the tingshan he from jgy's hands (since he is not the one doing the actual killing--xy is), then that's not going to happen--just like there is nothing that anyone can write about wwx's actions vis-à-vis his gruesome murder of wang lingjiao, wen chao, and the other wen sect cultivators that he tortures, mutilates, and kills in the aftermath of the sacking of lotus pier that will remove their literal blood from his hands. I'm not going to say anything that will make one of these actions more morally (I hate this word now) redeemable than the other, because even though their circumstances are different, the acts themselves are still quite awful!

one thing I did not point out in my linked meta, however, and which I do think is significant to call out when examining the full context of the violence that jgy oversees, is the amount of control that jgy does not have over how xue yang chooses to kill the tingshan he. please note that these excerpts are pretty gruesome because, uh. well, canon-typical xue yang, pretty much:

so, on the one hand, xy clearly cuts out he su's tongue here because he is flinging the usual shitty insult at jgy, making a dig about his birth status and his mother. which, yay, thank you xue yang c': but also, jgy is clearly surprised that xy does not kill he su and the rest of his sect before giving them to the fierce corpses. then we have the paragraph that follows:

here, jgy is visibly disturbed by the cries of the children specifically, and though he doesn't step in to intervene, I still find his visceral reaction to what he is witnessing significant when considering his character and how he feels broadly about the violence he facilitates. because yes, he brought the tingshan he to this place knowing that they were going to be killed because of their political opposition to his father's plans. he knew that bringing them to the demonic cultivation grounds meant that they were going to be given to xy for his macabre body horror experiments to pursue demonic cultivation. neither of those things mean that he expected them to be ripped apart while still alive, or that he's emotionally or psychologically untouched by what his actions have brought about.

so... how should we reconcile /gestures @ all of this, The Horrors with all of the tangible good that jgy puts into the cultivation world later on? my short response is, the exact same way wwx stans reconcile wwx's Horrors with his later good deeds (tho as you've probably guessed I don't lean as much on inherent moral goodness or badness in my analyses). so to make this work, we also have to take a look at what constitutes jgy's good deeds. nb: this is essentially what I wrote in my reblog meta, but I'm going to copy/paste or paraphrase/lightly edit it here just to keep everything in one place:

jgy's tangible positive impact on the jianghu

the initial points I raised in my reblog meta (different link from above) emphasize the tangible positive impact that jgy's actions put into the world: peace and stability for both the gentry and the common people. here are the following points where I provide more support for my initial arguments.

his tenure as chief cultivator and jin sect leader objectively does preserve jin ling's place in the line of succession, because once he is gone, we see that jin ling's position is not secure. period. this is in the text. this isn't an opinion. [edit: there’s some good discussion between myself and @madtomedgar in the comments of this post wrt jgy, jl as heir, and how much responsibility jgy has for destabilizing his life in the first place.] from chapter 116, the "banquet" extra:

furthermore, jgy does rein in the fiscal corruption that had been rampant under jgs's tenure. we know this because the text tells us so in the "iron hook" extra (chapter 123):

beyond making it unquestionably clear that lanling is in a much shittier position now that jgy is gone, this part 👆is further confirmed in the official character index of the 7seas translation--which is not something I usually rely upon in my analyses, but it makes clear the broad perception of life in the jianghu under jgs vs jgy:

jgs's character summary: "Under [Jin Guangshan's] rule, the Jin Sect was loathed by the cultivation world for its shameless abuses, corruption, and excesses."

jgy's character summary: "Jin Guangyao rose from humble circumstances and became not only the head of the Jin Sect but also the Cultivation Chief of the inter-sect alliance. His work as an undercover spy was instrumental in the success of the Sunshot Campaign. His skill at politicking and networking is matched by none, and through restructuring and reparations he was able to largely make up for the damage done to the Jin Sect's reputation by his father's rule."

in one of these scenarios, corruption was rampant enough that everyone was unhappy. in the other scenario, that corruption was reined in, and that matters.

the jianghu is also objectively the safest and most peaceful it has ever been under jgy's tenure as chief cultivator, and I don't think this gets acknowledged enough. looking to chapter 45 when wwx and jl are talking about the past, and jl is sulkily pointing out that both his uncles became famous at "fifteen-or-so," wwx's own thoughts are:

Wei WuXian commented in silence, That’s not the same! Back then, the QishanWen Sect was still on top and everyone had to watch out. If they didn’t fight and cultivate as much as possible, who knew if they’d be the next one to run out of luck? During the Sunshot Campaign, you’d be hauled to the battlefields no matter if you were fifteen or any other age. Now, since the situations is stable and the sects are at peace, of course the atmosphere isn’t as tense and people don’t cultivate like they’re crazy. There’s no need anymore.

in other words (to paraphrase some commentary by @xiyao-feels) when the wen were in charge, the world was a shitty and dangerous place filled with war and violence--and now the world is peaceful, and kids like jin ling are allowed to grow up without the very real possibility of being marched off to war hanging over their head at all times. jgy is the chief cultivator who made this reality possible.

and a big part of why the jianghu is a more stable and peaceful place also comes down to the watchtowers, which is one of the points you specifically wanted more details on, anon! so we'll go to chapter 42 in the novel to look at them in more detail:

After Jin GuangYao officially succeeded the position of Sect Leader and became the Chief Cultivator, he immediately gathered people and resources from the sects, and started to carry out his past goals. In the beginning, the voices of opposition were deafening. A lot of people suspected that the LanlingJin Sect used it to gain personal benefits and stuff its own pockets. With a smiling face, Jin GuangYao persisted for five years. During the years, he allied but also fell out with countless people. Using both gentle and forceful methods, he did all that he could and what he wished for was finally completed. More than twelve hundred “lookout towers” had been built.

These “lookout towers” were scattered around the more remote places. Every one of them were assigned disciples from certain sects. If anything strange happened, they’d take action at once. When they couldn’t deal with the matter, they’d send out messages to other sects or rogue cultivators for help. Even if the cultivators who came wanted something in return while the locals were too poor to give them any, the money that the LanlingJin Sect gathered throughout each year would be enough to support them. [red emphasis mine]

All of these happened after the death of the YiLing Patriarch. Wei WuXian only heard the ins and outs from Lan WangJi after they passed a few lookout towers during their journey. Rumors had it that Koi Tower was preparing to build the next batch of lookout towers, increasing them to three thousand in number so that they covered a greater area. Although after the first lookout towers were built, they received widespread approvals due to their notable effects, the voices of suspicion and ridicule had never died either. When the time came, the cultivation world would definitely be thrown into chaos again.

five years!! that is a long-ass time to devote to a project, particularly one that costs him substantial political capital as well as actual money, if your only goal is the consolidation of political clout, because a lot can happen in the span of five years. it certainly isn't the right way to go about laundering money, since for a money laundering scheme to work, it has to actually, you know. pass through a system that is actually making money in the first place, which this one transparently was not. if it was a guaranteed money-maker, jgs would not have opposed wasting time on something that 👆(see above) clearly devotes lanling jin resources towards supporting the poor who cannot protect themselves. whatever the political opposition to the project by jin sect opponents, for the broader jianghu and the common people, the success of the watchtower program was a net positive. anyway: when acting exclusively under his own power and allowed to make his own decisions free of fear and danger, jgy is fundamentally not a destructive character. (thank you again, @confusion-and-more)

okay I think this should answer most of your questions, anon! please do hmu again if you want me to dig down into anything else, I am, as always, super happy to talk about jgy at the drop of a hat.

[irfire]

OK, wow do I want to talk about all the bible verses Tamsyn uses in her John chapters! But, first a disclaimer: I’m Jewish and have a pretty solid background in TaNaKh and Jewish textual criticism but basically none in Christian/second testament textual criticism. Despite my lack of knowledge in the second testament, I went through and collected each of the bible verses for each of John’s excerpts - along with in some cases relevant following lines - because I just... had to know.

Part of my fascination here is that in many of these verses, John’s experience parallels elements of Jesus’. But, the biblical John is a disciple, not a messiah-figure like Jesus. John blurs the lines between Earth’s disciple, and “god” figure himself. The blurring of the lines in Tamsyn’s verse choices are also particularly interesting following her most recent interview where she said she’s got like six christ characters all running around. Everyone is a christ figure - and they all do it differently. Even the characters that are supposed to just be a disciple find themselves trying to play at a christ or a divine story line. Anyways, what follows is all of the verses and some of my loose and chaotic thoughts. Curious what others are noticing. All translations are from the New International Version and compiled using Blue Letter Bible.

John 20:8 “Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed.”

Okay when I first opened the book and obviously googled this right away I got CHILLS. We open with a reference to reaching the tomb and believing. This both feels like it’s in reference to everyone seeing the Earth as a tomb and believing. As well as, of course, everyone who at the end of the book, will go to the tomb and believe. She begins, as always, foreshadowing the end. And I find that infuriating and incredibly metal of her.

John 5:20 “For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does. Yes, and he will show him even greater works than these, so that you will be amazed.”

“Most of the bodies got the melt, like we thought they would... But, Harrow... all the ones I touched, all the ones I loved... they stayed incorrupti” (NtN 76).

Fascinated by what is either a careful writing choice, or a sloppy copy error to leave out the period after “incorrupti”. It’s as if Tamsyn whispers back at the scripture to add an ominous open ending to the “amazed”.

John 15:23 “Whoever hates me hates my Father as well.” And continuing to the next two lines “If I had not done among them the works no one else did, they would not be guilty of sin. As it is, they have seen, and yet they have hated both me and my Father. But this is to fulfill what is written in their Law: ‘They hated me without reason.’”

I’m still sitting with this reference. This is the chapter where U-- And T-- are renamed and John moves them from across the room. “If I had not done among them the words no one else did” feels tied here. John’s growing sense of self righteousness continues as he becomes more fanatic... curious what other’s think. It’s a juicy line and an intense chapter.

John 5:18 “For this reason they tried all the more to kill him; not only was he breaking the Sabbath, but he was even calling God his own Father, making himself equal with God.”

This is the chapter where they stream John’s necromancy. His journey towards presenting himself publicly as a “god” begins in earnest.

John 8:1 “but Jesus went to the Mount of Olives.”

This is the story that even I’ve heard about where a woman is brought before Jesus and accused of adultery while he is sitting at the courts and he says “let those who are without sin cast the first stone”. John is beginning to present himself as a savior - people come to see him for their sufferings and their problems. John moves further into the public sphere.

John 19:18 “There they crucified him, and with him two others—one on each side and Jesus in the middle.”

“Anyway, we all had Interpol warrens... Anyone who wanted to go, I let them go (NtN, 220).” This is also where it becomes clear just how bad the situation is - the rich are leaving the Earth to be crucified. The lines are blurry between who is being crucified and is it the disciple, the executioner, or the divine being telling the story.

John 5:1 “Some time later, Jesus went up to Jerusalem for one of the Jewish festivals.” Followed by 5:2 “Now there is in Jerusalem near the Sheep Gate a pool, which in Aramaic is called Bethesda and which is surrounded by five covered colonnades.”

Tamsyn also mentioned Bethesda in her article, and earlier on John does seem to get into a kind of faith healing. But the chapter this verse titles is when John begins playing puppet master to a dead world leader in exchange for money and nuclear weapons. This feels like such a sinister perversion of the healing waters of Bethesda, and in many ways this chapter feels like the beginning of the end.

John 3:20 “Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that their deeds will be exposed.” 3:21 continues “But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what they have done has been done in the sight of God.”

OOF. What a fuckin’ verse to pair with John going full necromancer while he’s nursing a nuke under his floorboards. WHOABOY.

John 9:22 “His parents said this because they were afraid of the Jewish leaders, who already had decided that anyone who acknowledged that Jesus was the Messiah would be put out of the synagogue.”

John does (his first?) mass murder. This is the moment of trial to his disciples. They are not thrown out, John manipulates them, and they stay.

John 1:20 “He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, “I am not the Messiah.” … And a few lines following in John 1:23 “John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one calling in the wilderness, ‘Make straight the way for the Lord.’ ”

“I am not the messiah” titles the chapter where the bombs go off. The world is demolished - there is no going back. “I am the voice of the one calling in the wilderness, ‘make straight the way for the Lord’”.

The line from Isaiah quoted in John reads, reads: ק֣וֹל קוֹרֵ֔א בַּמִּדְבָּ֕ר פַּנּ֖וּ דֶּ֣רֶךְ יי יַשְּׁרוּ֙ בָּעֲרָבָ֔ה מְסִלָּ֖ה לֵאלֹקינוּ׃ “A voice calls out in the desert ‘Clear a way for G!d, straighten out a pathway for our G!d through the wilderness” (My translation).

OOF.

John 5:4 From Blue Letter Bible: “Some Greek manuscripts exclude this verse. The NIV related footnote for 5:3 states:

Some manuscripts include here: “wholly or in part, paralyzed—and they waited for the moving of the waters. From time to time an angel of the Lord would come down and stir up the waters. The first one into the pool after each such disturbance would be cured of whatever disease they had.”

From time to time an angel of the Lord would come down and stir up the waters. Alecto awakes. I wonder what disturbances and diseases she will take it upon herself to cure?

[haztobegood]

⭐️ Annual Writing Self-Evaluation 2022 ⭐️

Thank you to @larrysballetslippers @so-why-let-your-voice-be-tamed @daggerandrose @jaerie @louandhazaf @loveislarryislove @beelou @jacaranda-bloom for tagging me! I’ve done this for the past few years and I love seeing how much I’ve grown as a writer each year! (2018, 2019, 2020, 2021)

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 14

2. Word count posted for the year: 52,141

3. Fandoms I wrote for: One Direction, Music RPF (Lil Nas X, Orville Peck), Ted Lasso

4. Pairings: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, girl!Harry Styles/girl!Louis Tomlinson, Harry Styles/Ted Lasso, Harry Styles/Lil Nas X, Louis Tomlinson/Orville Peck, Niall Horan & Harry Styles

5. Story with the most: Kudos: Not Another Lonely Christmas Bookmarks: Not Another Lonely Christmas Comments: More Than a Mic Drop

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): We're Getting Better With Time, I feel like this fic showcases how much I've grown since I've started writing. I learned a lot about pacing and adding relevant details while writing this one, and I've received so many wonderful comments on it.

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why): Good Dogs Don’t Bark, it was fun in the moment to share something inspired by Harry barking on tour, but it isn't something I put a lot of time and effort into, so it isn't very memorable to me compared to other things I posted this year.

8. Share or describe a favorite review you received: There were so many lovely comments all around this year, but one of the funniest was a tweet of someone complaining about my Harry/Ted Lasso fic Premier Fantasies that started off with "MY EYES MY EYES MY EYES OH GOOD LORD MY TIME HERE ON EARTH IS DONE." I feel like I've finally made it to a new tier of fic writer by writing something so unhinged that someone broke into all caps.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: I don't remember a particularly hard time this year, but November and December were difficult just from the number of deadlines I had. I was luckily able to finish everything by their posting dates, but it was very stressful. I posted the Louis Rare Pair, 1D Christmas Fest, art for Reverse Bang, and a secret santa fic all in December.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: The entire plot of That's What I Want. I wanted to write a rare pair that hadn't been done before. I picked Harry/Lil Nas X and thought it would be fun to do an Mpreg fic. I couldn’t decide which one in the pair should be pregnant. I laughed so hard when I finally figured out a plot with both of them pregnant.

More under the cut.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: From We're Getting Better With Time

He turns out the light, leaving his tired reflection behind as he return to the bedroom to finish unpacking. It’s strange, trying to put back pieces of his life into this room that they’ve never fit into. Everything reminds him how little this house feels like a home. The half-filled closet, the dresser without any knickknacks on top, the bare walls. Even the bedding he’d bought was a boring striped pattern.

He was never meant to stay at this rental house long term. But it’s been eight months since his wife asked for a separation, eight months since he signed the lease on the first available furnished rental unit he could afford. The rental has standard beige walls, beige carpet, beige everything. It is a beige purgatory where he’d planned to wait out the final judgement on his thirty-three years of marriage.

The ink on the divorce papers has been dry for six weeks now, and yet he hasn’t thought about buying a house of his own once.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: My descriptions and details have improved a lot. While writing We're Getting Better With Time, I had sort of an ah-ha moment. I got frustrated because I kept thinking that the story would be told better if I could write a long slowburn fic, but I didn't have time for that because it was for a fest. Instead, I thought about all the elements I'd want if I were writing the long fic, like Harry's relationships with his ex-wife and children, or to show the difference between the home his ex-wife kept and the house Harry was renting temporarily. I got creative and found new ways to slip those details into the story without adding chapters of backstory or filler.

13. How do you hope to grow next year: My goal last year was to finish some of my longer wips. I definitely didn't do that this year, and the longest fic I posted was under 8k. Longer works are a bit intimidating for me, but I still want to finish the bigger ideas I have in my wip folder.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc): The 1D Rare Pair group chat is always so encouraging for trying out new pairings! I branched out with some brand new pairs this year, with Harry/Ted Lasso in Premier Fantasies, Harry/Lil Nas X in That's What I Want, and Louis/Orville Peck in It's All Come and Go.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: Oddly, I wrote three fics this year that mention pancakes/waffles, and they were never eaten at breakfast. This was completely unintentional, but makes a lot of sense, as pancakes at dinnertime is one of my favorite meals.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: Stop editing your first draft. It is a lot harder to edit properly when you don't have the full picture. Try getting your idea onto the page first, then perfect it later.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: I have a the start of a prequel for Hex Appeal that I'm hoping to post for @wankersday. I also want to work on my Girl Direction Covid Island fic and my Zouis spy fic.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read. @zanniscaramouche @kingsofeverything @quelsentiment @ladyaj-13 @littleroverlouis @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @beelou @allwaswell16 @fallinglikethis @reminiscingintherain @lululawrence @disgruntledkittenface @justanothershadeofblue