#i felt soooo anxious but happy at the same time

[takethemonetandletsgogh]

this nye party was weird

[lovecla]

TAKE YOUR PAIN AWAY | quinn hughes.

chapter six:

<last chapter> <next chapter>

➴ chapter warnings: nsfw (masturbation (f. receiving), praise kink, fingering, dacryphilia, overstimulation, softdom quinn).

➴ word count: 4.6k

💌 from me to you: i’m sorry if this is terrible. wrote a line and then took a 30 minute break every time but hey! i’m trying my best!!! also thank u soooo much for 300+ followers i love all of u so much i hope u can feel the forehead kiss i’m giving u rn 😚 enjoy!

౨ৎ

2024, APRIL.

THE ARENA was packed with people, most of them wearing the Canucks jersey.

It was game night, and Quinn made sure you and Victoria had tickets, with the view you had asked for— perfectly near the Canucks players.

“Brock looks amazing,” Victoria whispered in your ear, and you giggled. “No, like, seriously.”

You wanted to tell her that you weren’t looking at anyone but Quinn. He was standing there, wearing his jersey and throwing the puck around while skating with Miller by his side. He looked stressed, but you knew that he always got anxious before a game.

You debated a lot about coming or not, even if Quinn had been the one to invite you and even if you weren’t exactly known for telling him no. But lately, every time he texted or called, you felt your hands getting sweaty, your heart beating faster and your stomach filling itself up with butterflies.

Everything that you swore you would never let happen again.

“Do you think they’ll win?” Victoria asks you, shoving a handful of popcorn inside her mouth.

“They’re on a winning streak so maybe?” You shrug. “I’m terrible with sports.”

“Ain’t that right,” she laughs. “The only thing that makes hockey interesting are the hot players.”

“And the fights,” you add, munching on your Snickers bar. “I love when they take off their gloves and start punching each other.”

“To me that also categorizes as a hot thing.”

“Fair point.” You nod.

The game went by in a blink of an eye, which surprised you. You thought that because you weren’t really interested in hockey, it would suck to sit there for two hours and watch men skating around, throwing a puck here and there. But by the end of it, you were sweaty and tired from all the screams you let out whenever someone from the other team got in the Canucks way.

You and Victoria got out of your seats, chatting about the game and how happy you both were because the Canucks had won 4-2. Quinn had scored two goals and you were ready to engulf him in a bear hug.

“I think they’re changing but we can wait at the VIP section,” Victoria suggests, walking you through the place like she owned, which was one of the things you loved the most about her; her confidence. “I hope they have snacks and hot dogs.”

“It’s a VIP room, baby, not a restaurant,” you laugh, secretly hoping for the same.

“Either way, I hope there’s food there, I’m starving.”

“We just ate a bowl of popcorn, chocolate and a family sized bag of Ruffles.” You point out, patting your belly over your shirt. “Plus the Coke.”

“It was diet, so it doesn’t really count,” she taps her temple with her index finger. You laugh, doing the same. “Girl math.”

The VIP section was, in fact, full of food. And drinks. And players' wives, girlfriends, families and friends. You felt like a fish out of water but sucked it up either way, texting Quinn and telling him you were waiting for him.

It took a while for him to get there, thirty minutes to be precise, but you knew that the games’ after hours weren’t exactly a chocolate covered strawberry, and with Quinn being the captain, he had to answer dumb questions and talk to interviewers.

But then, Garland opened the door and started yelling about the winners being in the area, which made you laugh.

“Hey, there, cutie,” he smiled at you, wrapping his hands around your shoulders. “Missed that pretty face. Did you see me out there? Nailed it.”

“Yeah, I guess,” you smile awkwardly. “Congratulations?”

“Boo, you didn’t even try to sound excited.” He childishly pouts, poking your cheeks.

“That’s because you’re not exciting, C,” Quinn’s raspy voice fills the air, and it’s almost palpable how all the attention in the room immediately goes to him. “Get your hands off her, come on.”

“Aye, aye Cap.” He kisses your cheek before leaving you alone, dragging Victoria with him.

You don’t even think about helping her because all you can see is Quinn standing in front of you, wearing a burgundy suit with his wet hair falling down his face. He looks so fucking good.

Cocking your head, you smile sweetly at him. “Hi, Cap,”

“Hey there, Mads,” he leans down, kissing your cheek lightly.

You think for a second before standing on the tip of your toes and wrapping your arms around his neck, feeling his hand find your waist instantly, like a magnet.

“Congrats on the win,” you whisper, not really wanting to let go. “You played really well.”

“Yeah?” He whispers back, pushing you away just so he could see your face. He smiles. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you sigh, letting him go. Looking around the room, you notice that some people were staring at the two of you, and you blush. Right, you remind yourself, we’re not alone. “Hum. Wanna go eat something?”

“Yeah, I could eat,” he shrugs, looking around. “At home, though.”

“You’re inviting me over?” You chuckle, running your fingers through your hair.

“I am, yes.” He nods.

The little Madisons inside your brain start running around, pushing the danger button again and again while yelling “abort mission!” to each other, but you’re still human, and weak in the flesh.

“We can pick Bella up, if you want,” he offers, putting his hands inside his pockets.

“There’s no need to, she’s at my neighbor’s house,” you tell him. “She befriended Buttercup, Mrs. Fernandez cat, and now she asks me to let Bella stay there whenever I have to come home late.”

“Smart girl, isn’t she?” He checks the time on his watch, and makes a tsc noise with his mouth. “If we go now we’ll still catch my favorite pizza place open.”

“Greasy pizza for dinner? Isn’t that all models’ dream?” You joke, watching as he laughs softly.

“Quinn,” someone calls him, making him frown.

“I’ll be back in a second,” he sprints to the other side of the room, talking with another man wearing a suit.

You could see Victoria in the other side of the room between Garland and Boeser, looking like she was having the time of her life. She looked like the ice cream part of an ice cream sandwich, the thought making you cover your mouth with your hand to hide your laugh.

Quinn really didn’t take long, walking back to you and placing his hand on your lower back, like he always does.

The drive to his place was long and tiring, but you managed to make it faster with your remarks about the game. And Quinn listened to you, replying only when you were laughing so hard you couldn’t continue speaking.

Quinn’s house was still the same as the last time you’d been there, which felt like a lifetime ago. The three bedroom house was still only furnished with basic furniture, no pictures besides one with his family from when he got drafted.

“Can I shower while you order the food? I think I’m disgusting.”

“Not really. You still smell like a vanilla sundae to me, but sure.” He answers mindlessly while he taps on his phone, probably dialing the pizzaria’s number.

You shower in the same bathroom you showered the last time you’d been there and when you leave, you find Quinn’s clothes on the bed, also like last time. You smile, putting on his weirdly oversized shirt and boxers, leaving the shorts exactly where they were because you knew that they wouldn’t fit you anyway— and the shirt covered Quinn’s new boxers just fine.

You walked back to the living room, finding Quinn standing in the middle of it, with the TV on, watching the game from just hours ago.

“You played well,” you start, sitting on his couch with your legs crossed.

“Thank you,” he smiles, pointing at the unopened red wine bottle sitting on his coffee table. “Thought we should celebrate.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course we should!” You jump out of the couch, headed to his kitchen cabinets looking for wine glasses. “Uh. I just remembered I don’t know where your things are.”

You open the cabinet either way, mentalizing that it shouldn’t be so hard finding two glasses of wine. Only to hear Quinn’s low chuckle, and his body behind yours— his right hand holding you down by your waist and the other one reaching for the glasses inside the cabinet on your left.

“I like to keep them out of my own reach,” he jokes, but you don’t even think about laughing.

Not when his crotch is perfectly aligned with your ass, his hand hot and steady on your waist, his hard chest brushing your back. It’d been brief, only enough time for him to reach the glasses and pick them up, but it’d been enough for you to feel all over the place again.

“Maddie?” He calls you, and you realize you have been standing there for a few seconds now.

“Oh, right,” you smile awkwardly and walk back towards the living room.

While Quinn poured both of you wine, you contemplated what you should do.

Well, fuck my childhood best friend isn’t a thing I should do, you remind your stupid brain, who sometimes liked to conjure images of what fucking Quinn Hughes would look like for you.

The risk of fucking everything up was high and the risk of falling in love with him was even higher. Quinn wasn’t a hard person to love, and with the way he treated you? The way he was ready to hand you anything on a silver plate? It would be like breathing underwater. Impossible.

Thankfully, your mood didn’t take too long to recover, and after an entire bottle of wine and three slices of pizza, you were back at it.

“The worst thing is,” you started, helping Quinn tidy the kitchen and putting away the dirty dishes. “One of the girls sitting next to us was extremely obsessed with you. I swear, she spent the entire two hours shouting your name even when you weren’t there.” You laugh, remember how Victoria threatened to smash her head against the glass.

“I get that a lot and I already told you, I don’t get the appeal,” he shrugs, placing the remaining pizza slices inside a container and tossing it inside his fridge. “Plus, I’m not interested in puck bunnies. They’re not really my thing.”

You gasp, making Quinn stop what he was doing to stare at you. “Does Quinn Hughes have a type?”

“That’s not what I—”

“You do!” You gently place the wine glasses inside of the dishwasher, closing it afterwards. “What is it?”

He laughs, closing the fridge door. “Madison, I don’t have a type.”

“Of course you do. So that’s why you’re one of the few hockey players I know that rarely makes it to dating gossip websites.”

“You’re being insane.”

You shush him with your hand.

“Let me think,” you tap your chin with your index finger, really putting your brain to work. “Okay. Maybe you’re like Jack who’s into musically inclined blondes?”

“No?” He raises his eyebrow. “And since when does Jack—”

“Okay, then maybe you’re like Luke and like frat girls?”

“That doesn’t even sound legal. I’m twenty five.”

“You’re twenty four, we’re not in October yet,” you remind him, trying to think of other types of girls. “What about redheads—”

He gently places his hands on each side of the counter, locking you in place. He cocks his head. “Why is it so important for you to know who I’m into or who I’m not?”

“I just think it’s funny,” you bite your tongue, contemplating what you were about to say. But fuck it, right? You could blame it all on the alcohol later, even if you weren’t even tipsy. “Perhaps fifteen year old me would like to know if she’d have a chance with you.”

He frowns. “Fifteen year old Madison? Not a fucking chance. You were a child.”

“Boo, you’re no fun,” you roll your eyes. “If you don’t think I’m pretty just say that.”

He rolls his eyes again, mimicking your action.

“I didn’t say that,” he clicks his tongue, blue eyes looking down at you, moving around your face. “Ask me what I think about twenty-two year old Madison.”

You gulp, tilting your head back and staring at him in the eye.

Danger, mayday, Madison, get the hell out of there.

“What,” you whisper, licking your lips mindlessly. “What do you think of twenty-two year old Madison?”

“I think you’re perfect,” he whispers back, stepping closer to you, forcing your head to tilt back again so you could maintain eye contact. “I still think you’re the sweetest person to ever walk on Earth, and I’m going insane over the fact that you’re this close to me and I can’t fucking move a finger.”

His statement shocks you, making your eyes double in size. “Quinn—” you start, but he shakes his head.

“Ever since you got back here, ever since I saw you again after fucking seven years,” he steps away from you, running his fingers through his hair in a frustrated move. “You’re— God, you’re everything and you don’t even realize it.”

“I— Well,” you stutter, not even sure of what you could say. Hey, funny story, I want you to kiss me, like, right now.

“You wear my shirt like you’re proud to, you kiss my cheek every time we say goodbye to each other, you drive me absolutely crazy because I know you don’t care about yourself enough,” he calls you out, and you look somewhere else, embarrassed. “But the worst part is watching other guys lick the floor you walk on and not being able to do anything. The even worse part is looking at your lips whenever you wear those glittery lipstick things and not being allowed to kiss the hell out of you.”

“Quinn,” you breathe, leaving the kitchen like you couldn’t stand there anymore, pacing around his living room back and forth. “You shouldn’t be telling me this. We cannot—”

“We cannot what?” He walks towards you, only stopping when you’re toe to toe with each other. “Tell me you don’t want this, Maddie, and I’ll stop. I’ll pretend I never said anything and we’ll just be friends. But fuck,”

“We can’t do this,” you shake your head. “We’re friends. We cannot ruin everything just because we want to fuck each other.”

He smirks. “I never said anything about fucking.”

You feel your cheeks getting warm, and you bite your lips, hiding a smile.

“This is a bad idea. You know that, right?” You whisper, placing your hands on his chest. “Like, a really bad idea.”

“We’re both grown and it seems that we both know what we want,” he mumbles back, putting a strand of your hair behind your ear and holding your chin up. “Do you want this, Maddie?”

Realistically speaking, you’ve been wanting this ever since you realized you could like Quinn as something more than just your best friend. You’ve been wanting this ever since you realized that no one would ever treat you as good as Quinn did. You’ve been wanting this ever since you saw him again for the first time in seven years, looking gorgeous and extremely, dangerously hot.

You do want this, more than you’ve ever wanted anything else. But things could get complicated and… losing Quinn wasn’t something you were interested in doing.

“I don’t want to lose you,” you whisper, watching as his chest goes up and down beneath your palms. “I can’t lose you. If this goes wrong, then, then—”

“Madison,” he kisses your forehead, interrupting you. “Do you want this?”

“More than anything,” you confess. It was true, and even if you lied, Quinn knew you like the back of his hand.

Or at least he used to.

You weren’t prepared for how his lips would feel against yours. Or how he’d place his hands on your lower back. Or how his kiss would feel urgent and needy, making you whimper inside his mouth. Quinn kissed you like he was hungry for something only you could give him, making your knees weak and your breath quicken, the fabric of his shirt feeling soft under your touch.

You ran your hands through his hair, moaning with pleasure because you had finally gotten what you wanted. And just like your predictions, his hair felt soft, with you gently running your hands through his scalp.

You broke the kiss, gasping for air and resting your forehead against his.

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” you mumble, inhaling his sandalwood scent. “We’re friends, Quinn.”

“I know. And I still want you just the same,” he grips on your waist, hard. You were sure that it would leave a mark on your skin and just the thought of it made you go crazy. “And there’s no going back now, baby.”

The pet name slipped past his lips, the lips you’d kissed so bruisingly just a few seconds ago, making you whimper involuntarily. The wetness between your thighs was just a tiny hint of how much you actually wanted him.

“Let me help you out, hm?” He kisses your lips again, his stubble scratching your face lightly, making you remember where you were, what you were doing and with whom. “Let me make you feel good, Maddie.”

“Please,” You plead, trying to even your own voice. You sounded needy and helpless, but you had too many things going on inside your head at the same time for you to actually start acting like yourself again.

He only hums in response, showering your face with kisses while he guides you to his huge, brown couch. He sits down first, opening his legs and looking up at you, his lustful eyes never leaving yours.

“If you want me to stop, Maddie, just tell me, and I will,” seriously, he reminds you, kissing the tip of your finger. “I don’t care how much I’m enjoying what we’re doing, if you want me to stop, you say so.”

“M’kay,” you whisper, nodding with your head.

He mimics your action and moves on with his hands, removing your— his— boxers, slowly pulling them down, until they meet the floor with a soft thud. Then he helps you remove your legs from the holes, the right first and then the left, his big, warm hands on your thighs making you feel wetter.

He pats the spot between his legs, silently asking you to sit there, with your back against his chest, your head resting against his shoulder.

He gives you goosebumps as he slowly trails a path down your neck with his lips, making a wet sound whenever his mouth touches your burning skin. His hands keep going up and down your thighs, slowly lifting your— again, his— shirt to expose half of your belly and your most intimate part for him.

“Place your heels on the edge of the couch, pretty.”

You couldn’t help but feel your face burn with embarrassment as you did what he said, sliding your feet apart until your legs were spread wide apart. Sex had always been something boring to you and you preferred to do anything else other than let a guy fuck you.

But with Quinn things were already so different. You felt close to him, not only because you were literally on his arms, sitting between his legs, no. Truth be told, Quinn already owned your heart, and getting him to touch you like this was heavenly, but also extremely embarrassing.

You moan as his right index finger runs up and down through your slit, barely touching your clit.

“You’re so wet, baby,” his whispers, voice filled with desire, making you shiver inside his arms. “Who got you so worked up?”

“You,” you breathe. “You did, Quinn.”

“Mhm, that’s right, aren’t you just so sweet, baby?” He chuckles, inserting one finger inside your pussy, making you involuntarily try to close your legs, only to have his left hand holding them apart. “Do you think you’re sweet all over?”

“Quinn.”

He thrusts his finger inside you, finding your spot almost immediately, the wet sound of sex helping the blush on your face grow. Then, after teasing you for a while, he removes himself from you, bringing his index to his mouth, licking the wetness away.

Your face was burning, you wanted to run away and never come back, and it was even worse when you caught the slightest hint of a smile on his face.

“You are,” he whispers, tightening the hold on your thigh and inserting his finger in your hole again, only to take it out after a while. “See it for yourself.”

You were going to die. That was it. Here lies Madison Carter, the girl who thought she could handle Quinn Hughes.

“Open your mouth for me, baby,” he instructs, his raspy tone reaching your ears and making your stomach warm. You slowly part your lips, wrapping them around Quinn’s finger, tasting yourself for the first time in your life. And maybe it was just the power of his words inside your mind, or maybe you were too horny to think correctly but if you closed your eyes and searched inside of your taste buds for a minute, you’d actually see that— it was, indeed, sweet. “Good job, baby.”

You whimper around his finger. Quinn slips two fingers inside your pussy, with little to no resistance with how wet you were. His fingers start up a quick finger fucking that echoes wetly in the living room, making your eyes roll to the back of your head, your cheeks wet with tears you didn’t even know you’d shed.

He’s fast, his palm touching your swollen, needy clit every time he thrusted his fingers into your hole, making you moan loudly, not even caring about the late hours. Your left hand grabs Quinn’s left arm, probably hurting him with how strongly you were holding him but you didn’t care—

You had always been easily overwhelmed and with how much Quinn had teased you, you knew you wouldn’t last long.

“Quinn, I— fuck,” your words get interrupted when you feel a third finger trying to get past your tight entrance, a loud moan coming out of your mouth when it succeeds. The stretch making your pussy hurt so freaking good, tears decorating your face like paintings in museums.

Quinn curls his fingers inside of you, making you slightly lift your hips, surprised with how much pleasure he could give you with just three fingers.

“I’m close, oh my god, Quinn, I’m—” overwhelmed with thoughts of QuinnQuinnQuinn, you sit back on the couch, once again trying to close your legs, and, once again, being unsuccessful.

“You can take it, baby, come on, give me what I want.” He shamelessly opens your legs more, thumb sliding left to right on your clit, making you gasp and whimper incoherent words, babbling nonsense that not even the smartest people in the world could comprehend.

When you came, it was like all of your worries went away, the weight in your shoulder ten, a thousand times lighter. You were crying and you probably looked like a mess, but thinking that Quinn’s responsible for getting you like this only makes you happier.

He didn’t stop fingering you, though, overstimulating your clit until the very last minute; until he had you crying loudly and screaming in his arms.

“Sh, baby, you can take it,” he kisses your wet cheek, slowly stopping his fingers. “Tell me, baby, you can take it.”

You hiccup, trying to hide yourself inside his arms.

“Say it, sweets, and I’ll let you go.”

“I— I can take it.” You whisper, voice hoarse and tired.

“Good girl,” he removes his fingers from your pussy, promptly sliding them inside your mouth, again. You didn’t need instructions this time, you just did what you knew he wanted you to, licking his fingers clean until there was nothing but your saliva on them. “You’re perfect.”

He tilts your head to the side, kissing your lips and brushing his tongue against his.

“How are you feeling, love?” He asks after he breaks the kiss, calmly covering you with your shirt again, wiping your tears away with his left hand.

Love.

“Like I’m made of cotton candy,” you smile tiredly, resting your head against his shoulder. You can feel his body moving as he softly laughs, wrapping his hand around your waist and pulling you closer. “Wanna stay here forever.”

“Sleep here tonight,” he offers, and kisses your cheek again. “I have tomorrow off.”

“Well, I don’t,” you chuckle, remembering that you had to be up early in the morning. “Besides, I have my daughter waiting for me at home.”

He laughs, nodding. “Fair point. Then let me take you home?”

“Yeah,” you agree, only to snuggle closer to his body. “Let’s go.”

You end up napping for about thirty minutes before he wakes you up and hands you another change of clothes, helping you change before he wraps his jacket around you and places a Canucks beanie on your head.

“You can never be warm enough.” He says before opening the door, letting you leave first.

On your way home, inside the warmth of his car, you thought about what this would mean to your friendship. Friends with benefits sounded childish, icky, and not something you were looking forward to. And you weren’t lying to Conor when you told him that you weren’t looking for someone.

Even if that someone was Quinn.

“I can hear you thinking.” He jokes, making you giggle.

“I’m sorry, I just— how do we act now?” You finally say, turning your head to the side and watching his side profile.

“You told Conor you aren’t looking for anyone right now.”

“I did.”

“Well,” he starts. “I’m not saying this because I want you to make a decision or anything like that. But,” he sighs. “I’m not the type of guy who will make arrangements to fuck you during the weekends and move on with my life on the week days.”

You frown. “I don't want that…”

He chuckles. “I know you don’t, baby.”

“But I don’t want a relationship now either. I don’t think I’m… ready.”

This wasn’t exactly a conversation you wanted to have inside a moving car, but oh well. It was too late now. Besides that, you trusted Quinn and you wanted things to be as clear as water between the two of you.

“We don’t have to date,” he adds before parking in front of your building, turning the car off. “What I meant is that I don’t share. If you think we’re better off as friends, then I’ll respect that.”

You blink slowly, tired.

“I don’t… I mean, I wasn’t lying when I told you you ruined the dating experience for me,” you mumble, fidgeting with your fingers, smelling his cologne on the jacket you were wearing. “I’ve only had two boyfriends before you. And honestly, I’m not interested in sharing either.”

“We can take it slow then, sweet girl,” he kisses your forehead, poking your cheek after. “Thank you for giving me a chance.”

You wanted to tell him that you had been the one waiting all these years, even if unconsciously. But you had already embarrassed yourself enough for the week, so you just gave him the tiniest, shyest peck on his lips and smiled, leaving the car after wishing him a good night.

Later, while you cuddled Bella and talked with her about your day— leaving the naughty parts aside, of course—, you let yourself dream about what a relationship with Quinn would mean.

Even if you knew that if he really got to know you’d become, he would get tired of you in a second.

“One day at a time, right, baby?” You kissed Bella’s head, letting your exhaustion win.

taglist: @hischierswhore @ru-kru @alwaysclassyeagle @he6rtshaker @nope-i-am-done @nngkay 🤎

[cosmal]

ooooh poly!marauders who are really in tune with their s/o's emotions, even when she tries to hide them? like maybe they're out for a meal or at a party and she gets overwhelmed and they just realise straight away and bring her out of the setting? i love them soooo much

in the car

summary the boys take you home when you get overwhelmed at a party.

content poly!marauders x fem!reader

note omg first poly!m blurb. sorry it kinda sucks :[

You sit on a retaining wall in Marlene's backyard and try to focus on her pretty flowers instead of feeling so anxious. You haven't spoken to anyone in twenty minutes, not even the boys, and you've really tried your best not to put such a damper on the night.

They're having a lot of fun, you know they've had a tiring week and everyone hasn't been together in a long time so you won't ruin anything for them.

You pick at your nails and chew on the ice in your drink to keep your mind distracted. You thought you could handle it tonight, you hoped you wouldn't get as overwhelmed as you were expecting. You'd felt anxious before you even left, you thought seeing your friends might've helped.

You're too busy staring a hole through your glass to notice James sitting next to you. You startle when he speaks and bite your lip at your error.

"Hey, sweetheart," he says softly and ignores your jump. You feel a little pathetic.

"James," you sigh. You can't look him in the eye.

"Ready to go?" he clasps and hand to your shoulder and does that stupid, toothy grin he knows you love.

"What? We just got here." It feels like it's been hours. It's been one at most.

"Yeah, I know." He stands back up and hovers over you. It's almost irritating how pretty he looks. He doesn't make any of this any easier. You feel awful for ruining their night. "You look so sad, honey. We thought we'd go home."

"I can Uber if you want." You regret it before you even say it.

"What? No, don't be so silly." Yeah. Expected.

"I don't wanna leave just cause of me. I'm fine, don't worry."

James doesn't let you mope any longer. "No, c'mon, up."

"James..."

"It's okay," he takes your hand to encourage you, smiling, "really. I wanna leave anyway." Then much quieter, "Frank's tryna get me drunk."

You let him lift you up and fall into his side where you feel you belong. You feel half-relieved already, despite feeling selfish. "Where're the others?"

"Sirius went to get the car,'' he grabs your hand and leads you through the side gate. "I think Remus went with him."

You're not sure why you feel so blindsided by this all. Most of the time they're so intuned with you, they know when you're overwhelmed or just having a bad time. You're the same with them. You rub Remus's shoulders before without him telling you they're sore, you call James when you know he's having a bad day after he messages you, and you hug Sirius before he tells you he wants a cry.

You step out onto the pavement and find Sirius pulled up with Remus, waiting for you and James. You feel bad for ditching but not as much as so when they look so happy to see you. "What if I'd convinced you to stay? They would've been out here all night, probably," you ask before you get to the car.

"Wouldn't have worked." He opens your door for you.

You slide along the back seat for James to sit next to you and are welcomed by a lovely warmth. James gets in too and you think he wants to click you in as well but decides against it.

"You okay, lovely?" Remus asks from the passenger seat, he twists around to look you over and you feel bare.

"I'm okay," you say softly. "Hasn't Sirius been drinking?"

Sirius snorts from behind the wheel. "I've had two, don't worry, lovely."

You know you're deflecting, you suspect as soon as Sirius also asks if you're okay, you might cry. Your throat feels thick with an upset that feels worse now in a contained space. This is half the reason you wanted to leave on your own. Not that being surrounded by your boys when you're upset is bad, just might've been easier to steel yourself.

You reach a hand down on the seat between you and James and scrunch it tight. He unclicks himself and sides over to you. He gets an arm around your shoulder and encourages you into his side, as much as your seatbelt will allow.

"You okay?" Sirius dangerously whips his head back to look at you, pouting.

The first tear dribbles down your cheek.

You hide your face in James's firm shoulder and shake your head. He tuts and cages your head in with a big hand. Your tears are hot and slow, marring James's pretty shirt. You hope you don't turn messy with it. He looks good.

James murmurs something like, "Hurry up, Sirius." The car roars.

You feel the car slow at a red light and peel yourself away from James's chest. Face wet and hot, your hair stuck to your cheeks. "Shit, I'm sorry," you curse and wipe your face with a rough hand. James's arm stays around your shoulder.

"Hey, it's okay, yeah?" Remus uses his long arm to grab your knee. He squeezes firmly and it feels nice. You hope you're close to home, you want to hug Sirius as well. He looks similarly worked up.

"I'm sorry I made us leave," you sniffle.

"You didn't make us do anything," James says, voice as firm as he can manage. "We don't mind. It's just...you gotta tell us if you're not feeling good, okay? We might be able to prevent these pretty eyes from crying." He uses the side of his finger to wipe under your watery eyes, brushing over your clumped eyelashes. You blink slowly.

"I didn't want to ruin-"

"You didn't ruin anything," Sirius interrupts, "We just want to make sure you're okay."

He steals another look at you. You nod gently. "Yeah."

"Remus was complaining to me, anyways," James says, smug. "Said I looked so good that he wanted to take me home."

You start to laugh, much to the boy's pleasure. "Really?"

"Yeah," James nods, "Said he wanted to - and I quote - jump my bones."

Remus looks incensed. You're just happy the teasing isn't on your behalf for once. "Whatever, James."

"You do look pretty, James," you say, still sidled up to him, "I don't blame him."

He squeezes you hard. and laughs, pleased you're feeling better. "I'm sure Remus'll be telling me all night how good this shirt looks on me."

"It does!"

"Okay, James's head might explode," Sirius says. He'd looked just as in love all night, you'd seen it.

"Woah!"

You sit back and watch your boys fight over stupid things. You think you could do it for the rest of your life if they allowed it. You're sure they'd make a fool of themselves over and over if it made you happy.

Sirius catches you staring. "Feeling a little better?"

You nod, pleased, but embarrassed to be caught. "Yeah."

"Good." You must be almost home.

"Hey, Sirius?" you say softly.

"Yeah, lovely?" He might crash if he keeps turning to look at you like that.

"Can we stop at McDonald's?" you ask softly, even softer eyes like he'd ever say no.

"Yeah, sounds good. Remus needs a happy meal."

-

[rolling-storm-writing]

I'd like to request Tonowari x Top Male reader. Tonowari and reader have been dating for years and finally decide that they are going to mate. Just a lot of fluffy mating stuff.

Tonowari x Top!M!Reader

A/N: Soooo I know I’ve gotten some previous avatar requests and I swear I’ve seen them- I’m just scared y’all!! I want that Ronal/Tonowari too I’m just really intimidated because I wanna do these characters justice.  Especially after my recent lack luster works (I’m just not personally happy with them). So I hope this one is a bit better- I haven’t written anything like this in a very very long time.

>>>>>(+18 CONTENT SO MDNI!!)<<<<<<<

There was always something so serene about the ocean something that you could never quite place.  The gentle waves and rough seas enchanted and frightened you in the same beautiful feeling.  The ocean was your second home the place of abyss where the dangers of land could never reach.  

“The perfect day…” came his cool voice from just behind you a sweet jazz sound your ears always turned to.  You turned to look at his beautiful form, his dark curled hair splayed out down his shoulder and tattooed face turned up in a warm smile.  You loved the way his eyes narrowed and cheeks rounding when he smiled, almost able to hear his deep full laugh clear as the blue tide pools.

This night was a special one for the two of you after years of courting you would finally be mated.  It was a long time coming and neither one of you could contain this excitement.  Despite his success and firm demeanor Tonowari was actually quite shy and anxious about his love for you.  A trait you both shared after separate shared heat breaks from failed couplings in the past.

He carried your heart as if it were made of finest sea glass and you’d done the same for him as well.  And now after so much your hearts would finally become one…

“You ready?” He nodded taking your hand as you led him back inside.  This was evening was just for the two of you and eywa to witness and cherish.

Your home is a little way from the main village and just above the water, it’s a small but comfortable dwelling that Tonowari adds to by just being here.  It all becomes more real when the two of you sat together his blue eyes filled with nervousness and excitement.

“You're shaking," you say, in a gentle whisper.  You’re slow to touch him even now, your hands cradling the sides of his face with an almost ghostly feel.  He’s warm against you, noses nuzzled as you brought his forehead to yours.  

“I’m happy”

The waiver in his voice was clear as day.  You’d both struggled in the past with a relationship and after so much growth, you’d be taking that final step together.  “I am to” your own voice just a quiet secret as you brought your braid to his.  His gasping was the first thing you heard then his folded ears when you opened your eyes.

His pupils blown wide as he stared back at you with the same surprise.  “Do I look silly?” He chuckled rising to his knees with you eagerly pulling him into you.  “You look perfect…” all you could see was him, all your oxygen became him, your entire being belonged to him.

His breath hitched as you loosened the ties of his loins, the garment easily slipped off and laid to the side for later.  Tonowari was a large man by Na’vi standards and that also extended to the lower extremity he had.  But when compared to you he felt like a small thing to be brushed away.  Your cock is larger than his by any measure and for a moment he looked at you with questionable eyes.

“I’ll be gentle” you promise. Tonowari nodded and lent over, his plush lips fitting perfectly with yours.  You kissed him for another moment longer, savoring the taste of him. You trail from his neck all the way down the soft muscles of his chest.  

“You’re so beautiful…” affirming your words with a kiss to each of his nipples.  He’s splayed out on his back shuddering underneath you in a matter of seconds as you get lower.  

Swallowing the tip into your mouth and sucking gently.  His moan is a loud deep whimper, and you hold his thighs at the small jolt of his hips.  “More…please” he groans out a hand curling into the strands of your hair, you take him deeper until his length hits the back of your throat.  

You’re almost tempted to let him cum, but not just yet. 

You pull off him with a grin on your face.  Precum dripping down your chin as Tonowari looks at you through heavy eyes.  Leaning over you reach to kiss him, it’s sloppy mess but neither one of you complain.

Your fingers are slick with oil as you work him open, adding another digit with each ask for more.   His hole a beautifully blushed purple as you finish working him open, fluttering, clenching, and begging to be filled.

“Ready?”

“More than…”

Being generous would be a loose statement, your cock slicked with oil and even more on Tonowari.  He looked so beautiful this way, legs spread and raised with you perfectly between them.  

Tonowari felt the warm weight of your dick being dragged up and down his loose and ready hole. Pre-come was slicking up his cheeks along with the oil.  Your slow thrust was enough to drive him mad before you finally entered him.

A deep moan left his lips as he felt your cock rub against his rim and the head push inside.  You were big and even with prep this was gonna take a minute.  Looking down his hole was stretched beautifully around you, his breathing heavy with every inch deeper you got.

His arm wrapped over your neck as he moaned and whined into your shoulder.

And after brief moment you bottomed out heavy balls on his ass.  eyes crossed from how full he felt.

“So good…” you were both breathless and sweaty, and his comment made you chuckle he felt good as well.  There was no rush in waiting for him to adjust letting those heavy thighs wrap around you a little tighter.

His lips peppering your neck as you slowly pulled out so only the head was left inside. 

Pushing back in fucking him nice and slow.  You cock dragging against Tonowari’s swollen insides with every back and forth thrust of your hips, striking his prostate with each thrust. His mouth on yours and the warm wet of his tongue only heightened the feeling.  

He clutched at you even tighter pulling you in as close as possible; his own leaking cock, rubbing against your stomach and smearing it with precum.

His moans lost in the swell of muddled senses and all you felt was him.  He had invaded every one of them, his heart beating with yours, his very being. And Tonowari couldn’t do anything but feel and taste you, lost in how good it felt to have you on and inside him.

“I’m close” you moaned against his lips as Tonowari brought his legs up higher making you sink further into him.  His hole clenching down tighter around your aching cock.  

“Inside please” he whined bitting into the meat of your shoulder, his warm tears leaving their mark.

You emptied inside of him with a satisfied groan, falling forward onto Tonowari’s cum-slicked chest.  Your cock throbbed with each rope of cum that painted his insides, you were both left desperately clinging to the other a tangled mess of men.

His legs fell from your waist as they trembled from the orgasm that ripped through the both of you.

The both of you… 

———————————————

A/N: Im so scared to actually read this back so I hope y’all like it! Feed back, comment, and critique is always welcome. Yes my requests are open so send one in if you have any, I have a few ideas for a certain clone force 99 brewing.

BUT! in the mean time I hope you enjoyed and don’t forget your umbrella.

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Now this idea has been in my mind for awhile but I could never get it properly written. How about an Eddie x deaf reader whom he is soo in love with, he tries to learn sign language for her (took inspiration from a Hershey bar commercial where the guys is practicing in front of a mirror but then messes up when he confronts his crush he ends up signing ‘you chocolate bar’ instead of ‘do you like chocolate bars?’ Like how he’d been practicing it) I just think this idea is soooo cute and our Eddie bear and reader could really hit it off together.

Eddie Munson x deaf! Reader

Request by @mirkwoodshewolf

❤️❤️

Eddie had been practising this for months. Usually his focus was on D&D, band practice and memorising his favourite heavy metal songs to play on his sweetheart.

However something else has been taking up his attention for the last few months. He had been learning sign language.

You were the sweetest person he had ever met, Eddie had the biggest crush on you and from the minute he had learned that you were deaf he was determined to learn sign language to communicate with you better.

It was the most he had focused on any subject outside of his own passions and while he struggled with some of it, he was stubborn that he was going to be able to do this.

Even uncle Wayne had been helping him practice when Eddie wasn't practising in front of the mirror. Now he felt like he at least had a few phrases down and he was anxious to talk to you.

He hears the telltale sign of your trailer door opening, it was a loud and creaky thing that Eddie had tried to fix for you once or twice but to no avail.

After psyching himself up for a few seconds he heads out to talk to you, his heart skips a beat when you beam at him. Shit, focus Eddie, focus.

He could never get his words out when you smiled at him like that.

❤️

"Eddie" you call out happily, you've long been able to know when it's Eddie approaching you even before you see him sometimes.

He's hyper and it shows in the way he rushes over to you, it's like you can hear the phantom sound of his feet pounding across the concrete in his rush to get to you. When he's close to you he always smells faintly of weed and a woodsy cologne and you know it's Eddie before you even turn around.

You'd never admit it- well at least not yet but it was one of your favourite scents in the world.

"Princess, I have something to show you" You read his lips while he speaks and feel excited. Maybe he would give you a session on how to play the guitar, music always soothed you even though you didn't hear it the same as everyone else, and the deep bass of Eddie's music would vibrate in a way that you could enjoy, a way for you to feel the volume and timbre of the music.

Eddie beams and signs asking if you chocolate bar, you frown confused and you can tell he's beginning to panic.

"Shit, I was so certain I had this right" He groans and you giggle finding it endearing that he's tried to learn this for you and smile at him, "You're asking me if I'm a chocolate bar Eddie?" There's an impish smile on your face and Eddie while mortified is happy that you're happy.

"Uh no I was asking if you do like chocolate bars. Shit, I suck at this" his pouty expression is adorable and you take his hand in yours and squeeze it tight.

"Hey, I think it's really sweet you were learning how to sign for me Eddie, maybe I could give you some lessons and you could show me how to play the guitar?" you ask hopefully and Eddie agrees immediately.

Little did you know there wasn't anything Eddie wouldn't do for you. Pleased you keep hold of his hand and answer his previous question.

"For the record, I do like chocolate bars Ed's" The two of you spend a little bit of time arguing over the best ones, holding hands all the way.

❤️

[bettsfic]

Oh yes! I think you would love the main protagonists and their connection. I'm feral about this movie, I just watched the day before yesterday, and I'm so anxious to have time off so I can draw fanart of the thing because it's soooo good.

Now, I love horror, so I have seen so much horror in my life that I can tell you this is one of those movies in the genre that are different. Our protagonist is Sam (short for Samira) and she has a cat named Frodo (I'm sorry but that was genius in so many ways, I can't tell you why because spoilers but they really make it made sense, there is truly a connection there). Frodo the cat is a character as well, I have never seen a movie before that has an animal that has indeed some weight into the movie (at least not one that is not like Marley and Me or those kind of movies).

Anyway, sorry, back to Sam. The first thing you know when the movie starts is that she has cancer. A woman who has cancer in a movie that develops into an apocalyptic world is really interesting. The movie explored this in detail, and I loved every second.

She is tired, she is angry, she is brave, and at the same time, you can tell she is scared af. She has some problems trying to connect with people because she thinks there is no point in it anymore, and probably because she thinks they are sorry for her and therefore their interest is not genuine.

She used to be a writer. She wrote a book about poems. She doesn't have the drive to write anymore, but she carries a notebook, whatever she goes, and I love her so much, Betty. I can't even explain the whole of it.

So next, we get to know the ML. Name is Eric, she is from England and went to NY to study to be a lawyer. He is how you write Eddie on your Stranger Things fics. I went even more feral at this point, I was chewing my fist. They were perfect together.

They connect. They make wonderful things for each other.

THEY EXCHANGE CLOTHES!!!!

OLDER WOMAN, YOUNGER MAN!!!

I don't wanna say more about it so you can enjoy it for the first time yourself, if you want to watch it. (But if you want to know more, just say so, I would be happy to talk about it for hours!)

I would say something I just learned yesterday before I go. Eric has anxiety in the movie. He has panic and anxiety attacks during the movie. What they removed is that he was trying to kill himself when the whole alien/monster ordinal began, and then, he met Sam. They erase this part from the movie, I guess because of time, because I could tell anyway while watching that Eric was maybe suecidal or that al least he was neurodivergent (again, I would love to elaborate but spoilers).

Hope you have the chance to watch it, I would love to know your thoughts if you do so. Also, you can scream at me about it if you enjoy it as much as I did.

So basically, this is a movie about two really lonely people that connect and gain perspective about life and themselves while trying to survive the beginning of an apocalypse. It felt very transformative. It was perfect.

Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Also, sorry for any weird grammar sentences. I hope I manage to come across all my ideas, English is not my first language.

I forgot to tell you, they are not trying to escape the apocalypse for 3rd parts of the movie. They are just trying to get pizza. SAM STOPS TO SMELL BOOKS AT A BOOK STORE IN THE MIDDLE OF AN APOCALYPSE!! HELP! SAD BOY FOLLOWING OLDER WOMAN LIKE A PUPPY!! There is so much going on, and I can tell this is not a horror per se. I just adore them so much. Sorry, I just needed to add these.

okay you have Compelled me. i will walk to the ends of the earth for any "sad boy following older woman like a puppy" narrative.

this is one of the few movies i don't want to see alone so i'll have to see if my roommate would want to go with me sometime this week. if i see it i'll let you know my thoughts!

[neoarchipelago]

HERE’S THE CONTEST’S WINNERS! FUUUUUCK IT WAS SO SO SOOOO HARD TO CHOOSE !

You guys created AMAZING characters it honestly took 2 hours and the help of my Ghost to manage to make a choice!

Thank you so much for your participation you guys make me so happy!!!!

1

Name: Lupus grey

Callname: Grim (6R1M)

Age: in their 20s 

Gender: Non binary, masc leaning

Physical appearance: They have blue greyish eyes, redish/blonde shoulder length hair, they are rather short(about 5'6), slim - not really muscular. They usually cover their face with a fox mask because of a huge face dysphoria(the mask is shown in the mood board), they also have problems expressing their emotions so the mask helps with that

Backstory: Lupus Grey had always hated cold Berlin with its odd, outrageous old buildings. It was a place where they felt anxious but also at home. 

They were a patient, forgetful, coffee drinker with pretty eyes and a slim figure. His friends saw him as "the quite kid". They really were the silent type of person, thinking before using their words. But as soon they got comfortable they got loud and outgoing! 

Lupus had a.. Not so great childhood. Their problems were belittled. They were good at school but never good enough to earn some affection from their parents. They always wanted to become an artist but later found out that they had a talent for hacking too. They used that talent and hacked shady, big companies to force them to their knees. Someday they ended up finding hacker friends- in this case: sparrow!

@muttsstuff

2

Name :Richard

Nickname :Ricky

Code name :Car-Keys

He’s into khaki clothing (gets teased a little) but the main reason was because he lost the car keys in the drain when they were on a mission (was never let down)

Male - Asian Over- weight

Deep voice Loves dying his hair tips different colours (Depends on the mood)

Lives in his parents basement, loves to play MW2 but hacks games to his advantage.

He realised his potential and started broadening his hacking abilities and got rich off it.

Living with his parents is a cover (gotta stay hidden ya know)

@happy-potat0

3

Margo ‘Bishop’ Cassell

Age: 29

Female she/her

•5’6, doesn’t necessarily have a figure but she has “child bearing hips” all grandmas love and point out for some reason. Isn’t considered small but not how society considers “fat” she wears a size 12 pants if that gives an idea. 

•From Kensington Liverpool, grew up with wealthy parents in a slightly religious background. She’s almost the definition of old money yet also getting new money. Was in chess club growing up and also took computer science classes and learned to code, took it a step up by getting into hacking to change a grade for a friend to help them out. Moved on from getting into school grades to other… not so legal information. Promised to not do it again and eventually join British military much to her parents disappointment. 

•I also like the idea of Margo having a kid

•Bishops mood board

@sapchat

4

Name: Elizabeth/Liza

Callsign: coyote

Age: 29

Gender: Female

Physical description: Definetely redhead, and tallish, still shorter a bit than the boys though, slightly chub, so ofc insecure

Backstory: Started hacking cause the government of her home country was so so corrupt, Sparrow found her hacking the same system at the same time so they found her, Lashwell contacting, thy have been working together ever since. After a mission went wrong she was sent to the UK under a fake name for protection, thats how they lost touch for a bit.

@lilacwineandthesinkingsunmain

5

@jp2gmd2137

[solesurvivorkat]

Here Comes the Sun! (Doo doo doo doo!)

I'm beyond tired of ME saying it all the time, but I have not died, disappeared, or given up!

Longer story short: holidays were hectic but good, and I FINALLY got to start my new position within the company I work for - and though I'm only on my 2nd day of training so far, it's amazing the difference I feel!

It's like a huge weight has been lifted off of my back/shoulders/chest. I'm not stressed at work, I'm not anxious, my trainer is like, the sweetest, most patient and welcoming woman, I'm enjoying all that I'm learning so far and am eager to learn some more, I look forward to the future in my new job, I really think it'll be a much better fit for me and my life, and I hope to be here for a long time to come!

It's nothing personal at all against my previous coworkers... but you ever feel like you're just not you at your job? Like it's turning into someone you don't recognize and/or like? My prior position wasn't an awful one (I've had jobs that were soooo much worse), and it wasn't inherently difficult - but I was doing a lot on my own w/ next to no help (not my coworkers' fault, they had their own duties to do), and it felt like I was on a never-ending treadmill with no end in sight. It was just... so discouraging.

I know I'm still in the 'honeymoon stage' of my new position, and it won't always be perfect/'fun'/easy/etc... but I'm so happy to be here (so far) and it's amazing what a difference I feel now (like a '180').

ANYWAY - I feel like I FINALLY have some decent time to devote to 'Shadow of Steel' again, and am actually getting some MUCH-needed work done on it today! I really, really hope to have a chunk of the 'slightly updated', revamped previous chapters up on Ao3 relatively soon!

As for my other fics... well... I'll be 100% honest, I don't know if I'll ever finish 'The Book of John'. ...Which is really a shame, b/c I seriously had so many plans & creative ideas for that fic (plus, I totally wanted to explore the slow burn that would be John & Sarah in that fic). I'm not 100% cancelling it out just yet, but I'd say it's definitely in the 'limbo/chopping block' area of my writing plans. :-(

'I Need to Tell You' - same as above. I'd say it's around 2/3 of the way finished, so I would really like to complete this one (especially since it's more plausible for John & Sarah to have a happy ending in this one, LOL)... but I don't know yet if it'll happen. We'll see, I guess?

Thank you for hanging in there and waiting patiently, those of you that did... but if you haven't, I don't blame you one bit - but I'd like to hope that you'll give me another chance (someday, heh).

.....And in my mind, Arthur Maxson is waiting outside my door with a baseball bat - since his much-liked girlfriend has been kidnapped for forever now, and he really doesn't appreciate my excuses, LOL. *XD

[youranemicvampire]

My thoughts and opinions on The Ultimatum: Queer Love

These are all spoilers so don't read if you haven't watched or finished it yet, but if you like spoilers, go ahead.

TRIGGER WARNING: // ABUSE

Mal - She's like the kind of person I wanna be. She is so mature, emotionally stable, assertive, honest, kind, and patient. I'm a Virgo too, but I haven't achieved that kind of Virgoness yet. I saw her vulnerable and angry side, but I never saw her being disrespectful while expressing those feelings. She deserves soooo much better.

Lexi - I like her because she really knows what she wants, and she's so protective, but she can be controlling sometimes. She's right in a lot of things, but her being right doesn't mean that she gets to invalidate other people's feelings and opinions.

Xander - She has a really kind heart, but sometimes they are too kind. I'm glad she chose herself at the end tho. She deserves better too.

Mildred - She reminds me of my abusive mom so I can't really say anything good about her. She deserved that arrest and she deserves to be alone unless she commits to changing her behavior.

Sam - Can't say anything bad about her tbh. I'm just happy seeing her being more vocal and assertive.

Yoly - Mal was so right about her falling in love quickly. I also think she needs to consider being in a polyamorous relationship. She's too fixated on the idea of marriage when it's not for her.

Rae - I don't understand her tbh I feel like it's more effective for her to be alone before getting married coz from what I see, it's easy for her to be influenced.

Vanessa - That's an actress LMAO. Every time, I see her on screen, it feels like I'm watching a movie not because she's beautiful, but because all I see is acting. All her expressions and dialogues feel scripted. Her eyes remind me of what Christian Bale said about Tom Cruise - "Very intense friendliness with nothing behind the eyes"

Tiff - Bro, I know you love your dogs, but I hope you treat people like how special you treat them.

Aussie - I know they have communication problems, but I feel like people don't grasp the gravity of their trauma. As someone who has been emotionally and verbally abused at home, it makes me anxious every time someone raises their voice. There was even a time that I would literally hide and sleep in the closet because I was so afraid of my mom and that was in my early 20s. I hope people appreciate how they are trying to change based on what Sam said in the reunion. Change doesn't happen overnight. The important thing is that they are moving forward no matter how small it is. I also found out that they are in therapy which is a very good thing.

Mal x Lexi - They are actually very compatible and among all of them, they are the ones who did this experiment perfectly. The thing I noticed is that I haven't felt romantic or sexual tension which is good because it means that they are loyal to their original pairs and that they do not fall in love easily. I feel like they would actually work if they were given more time. I also like how Lexi gets along with Yoly and respects each other, the same with Mal and Rae. I was so happy hearing Mal saying that she wants to be a flower girl at Lexi and Rae's wedding.

Mal x Yoly - I hate to blame this on one person, but I don't see anything wrong with Mal. Yoly said she's being inconsistent, but I feel like that's the reality of a long-term relationship. It doesn't have to be intense and romantic everyday. I feel like Yoly has an unrealistic expectation and again, she falls in love so quick. Her revealing that they broke up just after 3 weeks sounds like sabotage thinking she could be with Xander.

Yoly x Xander - They are actually cute and I rooted for them before I realized what Mal has been saying about how she falls in love so quickly and intensely.

Xander x Vanessa - Vanessa loves being loved. She loves being chosen. It clearly shows how she only wants to get married because she hates losing. Not losing Xander, but losing someone who is obsessed with her. I'm sooo fucking glad they broke up.

Vanessa x Rae - They are just messing around lmao like it's hard to absorb what's happening between them coz everytime I see Vanessa, I just roll my eyes.

Rae x Lexi - Are they Earth x Air signs??? I know opposites attract, but they are too opposite. You have Lexi who knows what she wants and does everything to achieve it then there's Rae who is all over the place. I was actually surprised that Rae proposed first, but not surprised at all when I found out that they broke up after the reunion. None of them are really bad, they are just so incompatible.

Mildred x Tiff - We're talking about abuse here so there's nothing left to say. Tiff, I hope you are in a better and safer place and Mildred, I hope you're committing to therapy.

Tiff x Sam - They are actually compatible as friends. They are fun to watch, but that dog scene was kinda off coz why are you raising your voice to someone who doesn't like dogs. You should have talked about that before the trial marriage. It feels inhumane to look at that they would cook for the dog, but not for the person they are living with.

Sam x Aussie - Arguments and chaos aside, they are actually a fun couple. I love seeing them laugh and all and I'm actually rooting for them after finding out about their improvements and decision about going to therapy.

Aussie x Mildred - I know you all hate it when Aussie walks away, but I'm glad they did. Someone like Mildred is hard to talk to. They will only listen to themselves and they can't stop talking over people and being aggressive. There's no point in communicating with them.

I'm really glad that this reality show for queer women exists. I've seen reality shows and competitions for queer men and I'm happy for them, but it kinda reflects how the industry and audience support them because they think they are more entertaining. At the end of the day, we queer people do not exist merely for entertainment.

This also shows that queer couples are just like cis-hetero ones who are imperfect and messy. People outside our community should not put us on pedestals and expect that we are better when it comes to relationships because we're not. Sometimes, the reason we mess up is that most of us spent a lot of time in the closet not having enough experience, hating ourselves, and experiencing a lot of trauma from our family and society. This is not a justification, but an explanation. All love 🌈🫶🏼

[binniesoob]

the plan was to write a fun and light-hearted review but i guess that's not in the cards for me today ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ here's a bunch of feelings instead!

(no lore, literally just a lil rambling. feel free to ignore ofc - i'll probably post some unhinged reviewy thoughts later anyway :)

soooo... since this morning I've been trying to write a fangirling review full of memes for the name chapter: freefall like i've done before for other albums or their previews. you know, to have fun and scream about how good they sound or that line that made me go feral! and i do have something for a couple songs that i'll probably post later, but overall i kept failing because honestly that's not what feels right right now.

apart from back for more and do it like that (that are like an ass shaking break from dehydrating yay), i honestly sobbed my ass out with this album and i'm on the verge of doing it again as i'm writing this and listening to it.

the aspect that affected me the most was the lyrics and the way they delivered them. you can hear and tell how much txt grew musically. their vocals are really really great in every track, their styles more defined, and their overall group color too. they got back to the genres that fits them best (i think) - rock and disco -, experimented new ones - 80's new wave -, and something in between - rnb with dreamer that literally devastated destroyed demolished me btw, in more ways than one. when txt said in interviews and at the comeback showcase too that they keep trying to deliver relatable lyrics about their own struggles and feelings as well as their peers and the young, they weren't joking or overestimating themselves, they really are.

this album feels very personal to me. txt's songs always did, but with this i think we reached a new peak. i connected to it heart and soul.

personally, probably the one thing i love most about txt is how we share being in our twenties at the same time and how, despite different ethnicities, backgrounds, experiences etc, we are connected by our feelings and are able to sympathise with eachother and help eachother out, like, ahh... it just warms my heart. their music feels so close to me and that's honestly what any musician needs for them to become my favourite. once i connect on a deep level with their music that's literally all it takes.

I haven't opened up about this on tumblr before, but i've been pretty depressed this year. that's also part of the reason why i haven't been that active, together with being busy with uni stuff. i did had good days, i've been hanging in there, trying to focus on the good things in my life, but overall it's been hard, and i'm trying my best to get better soon because it's been tiring. i get so angry at myself because i have so many things in my life to be happy and grateful for, but i still get anxious and i'm still unsatisfied. i've been so frustrated about where i am in life, all the things i expected to be different by now, that i want to change but still can't, i've grown beyond impatient.

so, today, this album felt like the kind of understanding hug i've been looking for this year. growing pains is probably going to become what can't you see me was for me during the pandemic - an outlet to vent my anger and frustrations. chasing that feeling is going to be what take me home by ateez also is for me - my reminder to keep chasing what feels like home despite the hardships. dreamer is literally me condensed into a song (!?). deep down is there to remind me that even if my peculiarities can feel like a burden they're part of my identity and they shouldn't feel like it. happily ever after says it's okay even if things didn't go as i planned them, to embrace my failures and keep going even if life it's not a fairytale and it's unpredictable. i'll find my way. skipping stones feels like reading one of my journal entries where i write to my past and future self. and blue spring, a promise, has been here for me everyday since i heard it at the concert. with this album i didn't feel alone anymore, i felt that company and reassurance in a way i struggled to find until now, and i'm deeply grateful to txt for that 🤍

[bigearsbunbun]

1st day in 10th grade 8/29/2023

I literally couldnt sleep that much the night before and ended up staying up until 3AM, though I'm kinda surprised that I slept a bit early than usual so I felt a bit relieved. But knowing that I had to set an alarm so I wont wake up at 10 or 12 AM I was hella depressed from just the thought of having to wake up exhausted af. I ended up waking up at 8AM I was EXHAUSTED I couldnt even move for the first 10 minutes and I just stared at the ceiling. I was having a manic episode the night before because I was so chill and so anxious at the same time I couldnt contain myself.

I later found out that the entrance ceremony starts at 1PM so I felt relieved knowing I dont have to rush.

Then the ceremony began. It was just like the other ceremony I attended last year.....though I was more down that time I couldnt even listen to a single word I was hearing from the people on stage, I was so out of it TT its weird because it felt like 9th grade was just yesterday.....time flies so fast:/.....Anyway when I got there, there was already many students lining up.... it was I think 20 minutes before the ceremony starts I saw some of my friends from my previous school year I'm soooo lucky to have some of my friends on the same class this year...I hope I can make some friends this year too or just at least get along with some of them:D

After an HOUR of standing at the ceremony it finally ended and we all headed to our new classrooms. I was enlightened to know that my classroom was in the first floor cause I have a bad stamina and bad experience from my old school... I was first very happy about it "ohh I get to be on the 3rd floor!!" then months later "I HATE THESE STAIRS" so 2ND,3RD,4TH FLOOR CLASSROOMS?? NUH UH🗣🗣..

So when I got to my new classroom I immediately continue reading one piece cause Im too introverted and shy to even talk to my new classmates, but I'm pretty sure when group activities and all that start happening we'll all talk and get along well:) (probably not everyone though)..ALSO I just realized how much I space out but its not that bad it just happens at times Im seriously not aware which is scary....I believe the term for it is called dissociation but mine is just mild though it happens from time to time I think mine is pretty normal...

When it was time to introduce ourselves my hands were COLD. And when it was my time to introduce myself I just talked fast and sat down, not realizing I didnt include my other hobbies such as reading manga or watching anime but oh well I did tell myself I wont trust people that easily this year and be more secretive about myself since I talk so much about myself when I'm comfortable enough to someone....

A few hours later it was snack break.... some of my friends from our friend group gathered... gosh I miss them so much:{ I dont know but I think I became a bit more quite than last year.... idk though maybe its just me. So then we all started talking about our new teachers... some of them had badluck and have a strict teacher and meanwhile me I was luckkyyy even though I dont really fit in with my new teacher's humor she was still pretty chill and understanding and I relieved about it... though I still hoped that I had the other teacher I wanted to be my 10th grade teacher:( hes pretty strict but hes a friendly guy and teaches well... I hope hes my math teacher this year PLSPLSPLS🤞CROSSING FINGERS

Then a few hours later it was already time to go home...I'm kinda happy that the first day of school wasnt as tiring as last year:D...I walked home.... it was nice since we got dismissed pretty early than the normal school days since its still the first day after all.....I was walking while listening to the songs I downloaded on my phone and look at the sky...it was still 4PM so it wasnt dark outside yet.... it felt nice walking home like that:>.... while walking home I remembered one of my friends eshy gave me her snack since she didnt want any and I couldnt buy snacks at the canteen because it was pretty crowded and looked like it was impossible to even cut in line....I'm pretty grateful to have her as a friend....though she should srsly look out for herself too....so in order to pay her back I stopped at a small store...it was run by an old couple....I used to walk by the store a lot since kindergarten and I rarely bought anything from that store....when I walked in the old man smiled....idk but something about it made me a bit happy since like oh....its been so long since I bought anything from the store and its been...probably years ....he looks different from before....everyone gets old and its a sad thing for me to even think about://....anyway after buying the snacks I then head home and took this picture while walking.....thanks for reading this long ahh journal about my day:DD I usually ramble things in my journal but I firgured I should use this account instead and use it as a digital journal since I rarely post anything on this app, Im also planning on doing this everyday so lets see if I actually do it this time:DD so bye for now MY HANDS HURT FROM TYPING ONG but anyway take care!!

[khaleesiofalicante]

I'll have you know ma'am that I was screaming, quite literally, for most of this goddamn epilogue BECAUSE IT WAS SOMETHING ELSE!!!

I swear, never in all my years living on this earth, have I finished cleaning an entire house faster than I did today because I was running on the adrenaline of each paragraph and sentence and word. Even when I stopped a lot to continue reading just a little more between each thing I had to do, I finished everything so fucking fast it's kinda ridiculous kdhdisbd

We are getting three generations to fight in the next part??? I am an emotional mess ok?!??

Every little thing made me want to scream into something. The nostalgia is real😭😭

I have only known Camilla (I knew she was named after her! Fuck yeah), Iris (can you not, Gabrielina?? Also her powers wtf I love them), Joan (what a badass name for a badass girl!!), Atlas (I may have teared up and I am not ashamed!) and Theia (yeah I am in love what about it?!) for a couple of hours, but I know I would give my live for them😌

The moment this chapter started, I suspected who Kincaid was,and when it was confirmed I felt so happy and scared at the same time jdvdkdkdkd

LANCE??? NICOLAS???? AHHH😭😭

HE IS THE PoD SUDDENLY EVERYTHING MAKES SENSE AND I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM BC OF EVERYTHING THAT IS HAPPENING AND YOU WEREN'T JOKING WHEN YOU SAID LANCE ANGST WAS COMING HOLY-

Look, I know this is angsty and sad af, and I am in all stages of grief myself, but can we talk for a second about how Kincaid falling in love with the brother of the boy he is supposed to kill is so dramatic and painful is kinda funny?? I'M SORRY BUT AJ REALLY SAID I'M GOING TO CARRY ON WITH THE FAMILY LEGACY OF BEING DRAMATIC AF

One of them blonde and blue-eyed. The other was dark and gray-eyed. It was almost as if someone had split their father into two people. sitting in a corner sobbing my eyes out :))

Kincaid's destiny was not to love. His destiny was to destroy. Ok but is someone else sensing a Jace kinda vibe here or is it just me?? And yes, I am making jokes to cope🙂

We have answers, but at what cost?😔

You have no idea how excited I am for next part!!! I can't wait to hear more about what my lbaf gang had been upto and who are these new little shits I will love with my whole heart🥺💙

The drama and the pain and the love that we'll see... I can't wait why is time a thing we have???😭😭

Everytime I think this story can't get any better, you prove me wrong, and I am sooo happy about it. Love you writing. Love the story. Love you💙

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I'm so glad you liked it. And everyone else did too. I was soooo anxious y'all would be like this is too much or too complicated or whatever lsjnfvdnk I AM RELIEVED TO SAY THE LEAST.

love you 💙

[tcookies777]

Woah, I’ve found the end of the act 1 of AOL like a new opening to explain a lot of things about the story… I did not expect Sakura’s confession of her arranged marriage, but fuck, it was a pleasant surprise!!! I felt anxious for soooo long that Kakashi’s feelings were growing stronger and Sakura wasn’t being 100% honest with him… so, FINALLY! Kakashi’s reaction to the news suits him. It suits the character you’ve been developing in this fanfic. I admire you ability of keeping the plot real, credible and so accurate (Canon, even).

I have the impression that Sakura is becoming more and more mature despite her innocence.

I do have a question (maybe I’ll have to wait ACT 2 to know the answer, but I try anyway lol)

- Has Sasuke the same age as Sakura? I have the impression that it was mentioned that he had finished college?..

- How do you do? Where do find the inspiration in order to have a quality storyline? I’m just curious; You’re so talented.

Happy holidays and rétablie toi bien!

À bientôt !

I know right? Finally she spills all the beans! Of course, since we're receiving all this info through Sakura's POV, we still don't have the answers about the engagement yet but we will get there eventually! I know other readers, just like Sakura, have been dying to know what's up with her parents 🤔

That's a great impression! Sakura is different compared to in Chapter 1 so she's definitely maturing. But she has still got a long ways to go before I would call her a badass! I know some readers already see her as a badass, but personally she's not a badass in my eyes yet. And Kakashi too is learning, but he still has a lot of growth to go through as well!

Yes, you're correct, Kabuto mentioned to Sakura at the charity ball that Sasuke had graduated a few years ago. His age isn't that important to know or spoilery, so I'm free to say that he is 20 years old in this fic.

Of course, rarely you'll find a 20 yr old who graduated college years ago, but just like Kakashi, he's one of those ""geniuses"" that skipped grades.

Most of my inspiration for the story comes from real life experiences! Both my life and the lives of those around me.

For example, that Kakashi is a soldier is an idea inspired by canon. But that he has PTSD and other mental health issues is inspired by my experience and also the experience of others I know.

If you had seen my Percy Jackson fanfiction that I wrote as a teenager though, oh god you would've thought I was the worst writer ever. Because I was so young, I didn't have as much life experience to pull from. My dialogue was so cringy and stilted. I didn't even know how to write the character riding a metro bus because I'd never done it before!

That's why I guarantee you the best fanfics you'll ever read are the ones written by fans in their 30s and above. 9 times out of 10, the older the writer is, the better their writing is. They are masters of delivering nuance and telling epic stories. Because much of their own inspiration is pulled from everything they'd experienced or learned about life.

[homeowrk]

VENTTTTT WARGHHHHHHHH 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Disrespect? Defiance?

I simply didn’t want to go to a kids birthday party, I just wanted to study.

I’m already in Junior College, you think I have time for kiddy birthday parties and playing around? Why can’t I study? Why must I follow you? Why must you assert your ‘authority’? I am studying for my future, not yours. What time? I am just studying, why must I follow these useless trips? If I don’t study, I won’t get good grades, I won’t get a job and I would die.

Is that what you want? For me to suffer? There is no end to studying, this universe is small yet its knowledge is endless. I’m not a kid, I have to think about my future, the jobs I want to take, what I aspire to be. I can’t be coddled like this.

Why were you oh so mad that I didn’t wanted to go to your relative’s birthday party? It’s just a birthday party, for children, with games, for children. What am I supposed to do there? Play musical chairs with 5 year olds? You guys don’t want to know how mad my parents were when insisted that I didn’t want to go.

If I went, I’d be miserable and anxious about my work. If I didn’t go, I’d be miserable and depressed because my parents are soooo mad at me, but I’d still be able to study comfortably.

Yesterday was the first time in my life I stood up to my dad. Simply repeating the words ‘I don’t want to go’ while he hurled stuff at me. My mom said I was extremely rude, acting defiant towards him. I just said three words, stood my ground. I just didn’t want to go. It felt rather nice. The person who I thought was a monster that would kill me at anytime was just an old man.

Who were the forceful ones? Who were the ones that didn’t care about the others emotions? Have you all not seen the Singapore education system? Do you think a silly ‘1 hour study session!!!!!’ is enough to cover all topics? I’m so mad, they didn’t go though the same system as me, yet they insist that it is just as carefree and easy as theirs. Times will always change, people will not. They’d rather stay in their own little bubble of comfort and self-righteousness. I can understand that. But let me be selfish too.

I’m just so mad. I don’t understand my parents. I don’t want to go to a 5 year olds birthday party for the sake of ‘socialising’ with my relatives. Why not at Hari Raya? Why not at a different day? Why at a kiddy birthday party? In the middle of this time?

At times like these, I have to accept that really, I’m just a doll to be dressed up and taken around.

But I have a future, I’m human too. I have dreams. I’m human too. I’m a human, can’t you understand? Not just a ‘daughter’ a human with real emotions, real dreams and real concerns, why can’t you understand that? Why am I just a trophy? Why am I just a pet? Why am I just a doll?

I’m so mad. I’m so mad.. I’m so mad…

But I have dreams, and I have to chase them. These are little things, small hurdles. Perhaps a little test. Maybe these are the challenges I will face in the work force? Will I be able to separate work and personal life? The future. Is too much. Can’t I disappear now?

I admit that, perhaps I didn’t consider their emotions. Truthfully, I can’t understand them. Why must I attend a 5 year old’s (that’s is apparently my relative) birthday party? It was probably more important than their daughter’s emotions and worries. Perhaps that child is really important to them, more important than me. Perhaps they wanted to make that family happy? But two other of your children are going! I’m not your only doll, what about my siblings? Didn’t they go to? Doesn’t that satisfy you?

Or maybe they were acting in the heat of the moment, unable to come up with valid reasons for the actions. Perhaps they were just following their heart, not their brain. A ‘I want it, I get it’ mindset.

(I have no say in this household really, it’s shut up, suck it up, I’m always right)

But why be so forceful? Doesn’t no mean no? I have said three days in advance before you told me about the occasion, that I had to study over the weekend. And you said I didn’t manage my time properly?

The next time this happens, it really will be my last straw

I’ll really disappear. I don’t want to be a doll anymore. Is the ‘rebellious teenager’ phase? No, it’s not. Its a results of living in such a dysfunctional toxic household of 4 adults that really hate each others guts and vent and take it out on the children rather than amongst themselves.

No wonder I’m so anxious, so ‘shy’, so afraid. I can’t even talk to my damn teachers without feeling like vomiting everywhere. It’s because of adults like these that have soured my unconscious perception of my dear teachers. I’m already in Junior College, and still act like a child with severe social anxiety. What a drag. If I could kill my inner child, I would have done so when I turned 12.

I can never get used to this. Who the hell does? Even when you think you do, you realise you’re just deluding yourself. You crave love, you crave affection. It’s what makes us human. You’d still feel like a piece is missing. A piece that can never be filled till the day you wither and die. What an unfair life we live huh.

[fizzingwizard]

Had to go home today and see the ear doctor. Don't read on if squeamish haha

I'd been having some ear achey-ness in one ear for about a week, but since last night, it suddenly felt like a full blown ear infection, like I haven't had since I was a kid. But since I work with little kids, I tend to catch little kid colds and stuff more often than most adults. (I've built up immunity and don't get them as bad as I used to, but there's always something new and wonderful going around 9_9)

I had to go into work this morning, because I messed up last week due to a miscommunication. It was the same thing as when I had covid: my boss said "until Thursday" meaning I should come back to work on Friday, but to me "until Thursday" meant I should come in on Thursday. This time she told me something was due on the 31st, which I took to mean by the end of the day on the 31st. But she actually meant it was due before the 31st... From now on I'm gonna ask more questions whenever words like "until" or "by" are used

Anyway, I was able to get it done pretty quick, because my head was killing me and I couldn't hear much of anything out of the one ear. So I went home and went to the ear doctor. He took pics and my goodness. One ear was pristine. The other... soooo much wax build up. Not only was there a lot, but it was a weird color, and the texture was different - I usually have kind of dry, orangey wax, and this was dark and slimy. (see I told you don't read if squeamish!)

I've never experienced this before in my life. The doctor started cleaning my ear with these long sticks, and using this suction thing like the dentist uses (though not quite as strong, thankfully). I don't know if I can say it was painful, but it sure was uncomfortable. And I don't know why, but it made me light-headed! I actually got nauseous. The doc asked what as wrong and I was too dizzy to think in Japanese, so instead of saying "I'm dizzy," I said "My head is light." Which isn't the most common way to express it here, but it got the point across, and they had me lie down on a cot with a funnel in my ear that dripped water in to loosen the wax x'D

After that fortunately the rest went pretty easily. The doctor was this twitchy, happy guy who couldn't stop talking. I liked him though. The nurse was also nice but seemed really anxious for some reason. But idk, she calmed down, or I guess maybe she didn't understand why I was acting weird until she took my blood pressure and realized it was low, and then focused on just not letting me fall over lol

(I don't know with the low blood pressure. Although my guess is I was dehydrated because I rushed around in the morning and didn't eat and only drank a little water. Plus it's really hot. But I do get light-headed like everytime the temperature changes x'D I have debated whether I should talk to a doctor about it. It doesn't really impede my life, but it has made it hard for me to get serious about hiking and stuff. I love hiking, but I tend to feel exhausted long before my muscles hurt, and it's really inconvenient to be nauseous on a mountain. ETA: I looked up about feeling faint when cleaning ears, and there was a mention that the suction tool can change the temperature inside the ear canal suddenly, which can result in dizziness and faintness. So that's that solved :P Woulda been nice if the doctor had warned me tho...)

I asked before I left what caused so much wax, because I really don't wanna do this again :P It wasn't painful, but it still sucked, ya know? They wouldn't really confirm, like usual, the doctors always just want you gone once you're fixed up... but hopefully that means it's not anything serious. I asked if I need to clean better, but I was confused why it only happened in one ear when I treat them both the same. But looking online, it sounds like that can happen if the inner ears are shaped differently, or if you sleep more on one side. I am a side sleeper but I'm not sure if I favor my right side. I don't think I do. Anyway... Idk, will just be more careful about cleaning my right ear from now on I guess XP

Eventful morning... At least I get to be home for the afternoon now. What's funny is last night I watched a video about Ouchi Hisashi, who was a victim of the criticality event in Tokaimura. What he endured was unimaginably horrific. Sitting there getting my ear cleaned, I hated it so much that I started reminding myself "Remember what Hisashi went through. This is nothing..." Yup I'm a wimp

[abbynx]

Being Sorlato’s child + Being babysat by La squadra

A/N: Soooo, this is a direct sequel from the one-shot “Encounter” if you haven’t read it yet, feel free to browse it here 

Genre: Fluff, platonic, wholesome headcanons

- After the encounter, the couple found themselves thinking about it all the time, how different they acted to a child at the face of danger, and how afraid they were and how quick they were to act upon instinct and save you. There was certainly something the couple felt in their chest they can’t fathom but somehow liked the pleasant feeling. 

- One time Sorbet was found lounging around the La Squadra headquarters with a pamphlet regarding parenting whilst waiting for the meeting. When asked why he was reading that he nonchalantly replies that the thing was lying around and decided to read it because, “Why not?” One knows not to question him any further, so they let him be. 

- Gelato was found longingly staring at parents with their kids on the playground whilst on a mission and again, no one dared to speak a word of it. He didn’t leave even if the mission was over, until Sorbet was called in and had to physically drag him away. 

- They both knew it was getting out of hand because all they can think of now was wanting to raise a child of their own but they knew their circumstance were the least ideal to put a child in. For crying out loud, they kill people for a living and they didn’t really want to subject a child into this mess of their’s. 

- “God, is this what baby fever feels like?” 

- The couple has discussed about this, over and over than they can recall. When Gelato would suddenly mention, “You know, if we were to have a son I think that you can teach him how to ride a bike. That’d be sweet to watch to be honest.” or Sorbet saying, “If we were to have a daughter, I get to threaten her boyfriend to bring her back home before dinner.” 

- Once again, they were out to go on their once a week date all to their selves and decided to go to the same restaurant they had to stop in to save the child. And on their way their, what are the odds, the aforementioned child coming up to them and greeting them. 

“Ciao signore Sorbet! Signore Gelato!” 

W-was this a sign??? 

 "Ahh, Y/N!" Gelato was practically enthusiastic, he can just pick you up, but of course, he has to bind himself down. 

 "Out in the middle of the night again, I see." Sorbet points out. 

 "Aheh, yes sir..." You sheepishly responded. "But I really have to do everything if I want to graduate elementary with high marks." 

 - After a brief chat, weather, school and whatnot, once again you went on with your merry little way. After that, it was back for longing and yearning for the couple. 

 - The rest of La Squadra noticed this, but didn't knew how to help; until Melone picked up on the signs the couple were exuding: Sorbet reading the parenting pamphlet, Gelato longingly gazing towards parents bonding with their children, the two of them talking away about 'If we were to have a child...'— why, Melone's diagnosis: Baby fever. 

 - Melone somehow came up with an elaborate scheme involving an orphanage, did a couple of research. Due to some... Fortunate moment, somehow, someway, the figure running the same orphanage you resided in has made quite the list of enemies all his years. 

 "Melone you know that you can just tell them it's okay for them to adopt the child, right???" Risotto looks up from the detailed, complex document sent in by Babyface's user. 

 - Yes, it was stupidly complicated and a lot of work compared to just simply signing papers and adopting the child. The paperwork would be, again, stupidly complicated, but at least it doesn't involve bloodshed. It's not like the couple shied away from shedding blood but that wasn't the point. 

 - Capo Risotto had to consider their circumstances to adopt a child. Like I said, the dilemma was killing them and simply can't act out of selfishness and adopt a child just because they wanted to, it wasn't the same as a adopting a pet.

 - Cue the four hour meeting with the couple, discussing about what they can do and what they cannot do. Risotto was most certainly happy for the two of them to be adopting a child of their own, taking care of them and along of those lines but again, the fact they are a part of a crime syndicate and there were a lot of things they discussed about. 

 - After that, everything was settled and got started with the process of adopting the child. They didn't have to chose, they already had their eyes set on a specific kid; Y/N L/N, age eleven, abandoned by their parents when they were born, who adores reading and loves (insert food) and— what? They've done their research!

 - The couple was just beyond elated!

 - Through the process of adopting you they learned you were six 

 - Now that fact was uncovered, they were now more concerned and pissed why the orphanage would neglect a first grader and let them return from school at eight in the evening. And the fact that they met you under the circumstance of danger, pretending to be the couple's kid in desperation. 

 - Needless to say, a lot of things are going to change in your life, especially at the aspect of your security. They are a part of those people you should fear at night, admittedly gelato has almost pulled a gun on you that fateful night out of sheer jealousy, and didn't even register the fact you were barely half Sorbet's height.

 - First and foremost, you won't be staying in school longer than six thirty, as the couple takes turn on picking you up. They understand and adore the fact you're a hardworking kid thriving to have a scholarship in college despite being a literal first grader, but being a little kid walking alone in the middle of an evening is frightfully concerning. And in those times wherein either sorbet or Gelato picks you up, they'd buy you treats you want but not enough to spoil your appetite for dinner. 

- You did not hesitate to address them the way you addressed them that one fateful night when they tucked you in your new room for the very first time.. Gelato cried after that and Sorbet had to hold him to his chest to clam him down. Ugh, you were so effortless at making the two of them so soft. 

 - They're underpaid, not broke, so the couple spoils you in an overwhelming rate, the entirety of La Squadra were beginning to get concerned. Proscuitto scolded the two that they might spoil you rotten, but they reassured them you weren't. 

 - Speaking of La Squadra, the couple considered them as their family. Sorbet and Gelato did not hesitate to introduce you to them not as La Squadra, but as your uncles.

 - All of them were touched that Sorbet and Gelato want them to be a part of their child's life, that one of them would often volunteer to watch over you if the two were away. The couple were not going to introduce you to them as assassins and took advantage of your gullible nature as a young child. they don't intend to hide it as a secret from you. Perhaps someday they'll tell you their line of career, but six was not the right age to do so. 

 - Which brings us to their circumstances, the fact that they're assassins and how it is not an ideal career for people who has an attachment outside of their jobs. They were extremely careful in terms of that, wanting to protect and prevent others from using you against the couple. Well, now there's now a fate worse than death if ever that happens. 

 - With new responsibilities, Risotto understood them and gave them less jobs in order to take care and watch over you. But there were times where the two were both absent, prompting one of La Squadra to babysit you.

- Melone, Formaggio and Proscuitto are top picks for babysitting duties! but, of course, there are disadvantages. Melone is... Melone. Formaggio can and will act as a kid rather than an adult. And Proscuitto, well, he can be a bit too domineering. So yes, they are A-tier babysitters, nonetheless. 

 - B-tier babysitters would be Illuso, Pesci, and Ghiaccio. Illuso can be a bit too dismissive, Pesci will be too anxious and overprotective-- like in an extreme rate, and Ghiaccio... Hide your copy of Merchant of Venice, and you'll live another day. 

 - S-tier would be Risotto, except the fact that he is always busy. He is good with kids and he can guarantee their safety, I mean, need I say more?

 - Under no circumstances, are they allowed to swear around you. The couple already had restricted their foul language around you, and they expect the others to do so as well. Ghiaccio is highkey sweating when you started saying bullshit whenever you're frustrated. He profusely begged you not to day that again in exchange for ice cream. 

“Bullshit!” Ghiaccio’s heart skipped a beat after hearing your small voice whisper-shout on the dinner table as you attempted to solve a rather difficult math problem. 

 - Your relationship with them was well. They were protective of you, love you and support you. They're very affectionate, but not in an overwhelming amount... Well, at least they try to hold back but all they want to do is to spend time with their baby and love them unconditionally, as they should. 

 - Padre Gelato is more of a fun dad, very playful and energetic. He likes lifting you up to his hip before gently nuzzling his nose against yours. Dad jokes subconsciously slips from his mouth, be careful. He does a lot of cool tricks with his butterfly knife, twirling the sharp blade around while you stare in awe, whilst Papa Sorbet was more concerned that he'll accidentally cut himself, or that you might try the trick unsupervised. Needless to say, Padre was responsible enough to keep his knife in his pocket at all times to prevent that. 

“When will you teach me how to do that, Papa?” 

“When your old enough, N/N.” 

 - Papa Sorbet is a bit more reserved, but certainly not distant. He will not hesitate to kill someone who tries to hurt you. So he's the perfect person to serve as your teacher, as he helps you with school work and help you learn other practical things: cooking, baking, doing laundry by hand (which product is more effective to get blood off clothes), self-defense, etc. 

“So if there’s a stranger following you, what do you do?”

“Cling to the nearest person I see and pretend that I know them?”

 - They both tuck you into bed after reading you a bed time story, though it only lasted until you were nine because you insisted you were already grown up (cue, Gelato hiding his face on Sorbet's chest because his baby is all grown up--), but some things don't change because by bed time, they just check up on you even if they won't tuck you in to sleep.

 - Extremely supportive and encouraging. Like, they're basically the gasoline you pour on fire to intensify the fire of your passion. Like, they'll cheer you on sport games and competitions, tries their best to attend recitals, etc, etc. Though sometimes one is missing due to missions, sometimes both, but in the end of the day, you were confident that they would have loved it. 

 - Unbeknownst to you, at the end of the competition, a certain figure will come behind you and lock you on a headlock before harshly rubbing their knuckle atop your head. Uncle Formaggio can be a mean sometimes. So yes, if ever the couple is absent from your competitions, one of your uncles would volunteer to go. 

“‘Sup, little sport?” 

“Uncle Formaggio, my hair--!”

 - The first time you celebrated your birthday with your new parents was your seventh. They wanted to throw a goshdarn ball, but you insisted to keep the party amongst yourself. Just you, your papa and padre, and your  seven weird uncles. You were already a big family, and you were happy with that.