#i feel so limited in a lotta ways like there just Isn’t Stuff

[goldensunset]

mmmmm feel like some of my team members simply do not have good movesets though i gotta find a solution

[catscidr]

hi.. hello... may I request a dottore fic w/chronically ill reader? chronically ill as in, can't get enough sleep due to pain, doesn't clean themselves/shower, or doesn't eat a lot due to the pain and loss of appetite.

this part is a bit self indulgent but maybe reader can't walk properly due to it and needs assistance by dottore (or his segments) to hold her hand and let her cling onto them as they walk?

absolutely understandable if not! hope you have a good day :) 🕊

yes!! absolutely!! (included this other ask too bc i felt they were similar enough) im sorry i disappeared for a bit, life happened and this and that and i didn't have time to write and when i did i just.... couldn't write LOLヽ(；▽；) i don't have a chronic illness so i did my best with what i had (google and my own experiences with body pains n stuff(?) ) so pls lmk if there's like. any wording i should change and whatnot. big smoochies to u nonnie i hope this makes you feel at least a little better ♡♡ ⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝⸝ cw: a whole lotta fluff, established relationship, dottore is probably a little ooc bc he's very soft, him and The Clones are doting on reader HARD. reader is shorter than the men includes: fem reader, dottore and his segments (Omega is the oldest, Delta is webttore, Iota is the youngest), Columbina is mentioned, fatui npcs are also mentioned wc: 2,3k

The doctor was infamous for being cruel, aloof and barbaric. From his experiments to his way of treating his coworkers, practically everyone that worked in the Fatui wanted nothing to do with him, since even if they happened to not get on his bad side, even being associated with him meant other members of the organization would look at them funny. The only people the Harbinger spoke to daily, apart from you, were his many segments. 

The same couldn’t be said for you though. When you could, you’d spend time with Viktor or Ekaterina whenever they were in Snezhnaya, hang out with Damselette when she was free or simply just make small talk with anyone willing to stop by for a chat. Unfortunately, you haven’t been able to enjoy other people’s presence since your body’s been feeling quite sluggish as of late, exhaustion seeping into your limbs much quicker than it should. Your predicament made it so that you were confined to the four walls of your room most days, human interaction being limited to Dottore and his clones. 

Not that you particularly minded, since they were an entertaining bunch. Dottore took care of you most of the time, but since his job was quite demanding, he couldn’t be there for you all the time. Which is where his segments came in. 

“The soup isn’t that hot, and I already blew on it! Just eat already,” Delta grumbles loudly, his patience wearing thin as it made way for aggressive worry to take place. You stick your tongue out at him, a tired and petty act of rebellion despite your situation. 

“I dare you to take a sip. For sure it’ll be able to melt your mechanic tongue right off,” you huff in annoyance, both from the minimal hours of sleep you’d been getting and your own patience coming to an end. The man makes a tsk sound, torn between wanting to prove you wrong by humoring your suggestion or wanting to just grab an ice cube and tossing it in the bowl in malicious compliance. He doesn’t have time to decide though, because two people come into your room right as he opened his mouth to reply. 

“Prime told me to check in on you,” Omega says as he breaches the doorframe. “You’re taking too long.” he adds, crossing his arms. The older segment stares down at his maskless coworker, lips curling down in a frown. Delta scowls, readjusting himself on your bed- he was sitting to your right, his legs thrown over the side of the bed. He glances over his shoulder at the interruption, scowl now much more genuine as he glares daggers at the older segment. 

“I would have been back a long time ago if someone,” he doesn’t hide the way his eyes glance over at your sulking form, “had cooperated with me.” Still holding up the spoon he had tried to feed you previously, he lowers it into the bowl while gesturing for Omega to come closer. The latter walks over to the bed calmly while Iota saunters over to your left side, chatting up a storm about how he’s missed you and asking when you’ll be joining them back in the lab again. 

“Maybe if you knew how to speak to women,” the oldest taunts, lips curling into a small grin, the only feature visible on his masked face. You giggle as Delta bites back an insult, purposely ignoring his superior to instead try to make you get something in your system one more time. 

“Where’s Dottore?” you ask the Omega segment, turning your face away from Delta. The latter glares at you, handing over the bowl of soup to the other man. Iota suggests feeding you but is quickly dismissed by the other two, much to his dismay. 

“Busy. Although he said he would come by to test something, if I recall correctly... didn’t mention what it was, though,” the masked segment says, blowing on a spoonful of soup to cool it off. You nod, eating the spoonful when Omega presents it to you, earning a look of disbelief from Delta. “How are you feeling today?” the oldest asks, tuning out Delta’s many choice words aimed at him. You do the same, focused on eating and taking your time swallowing the food so as to not upset your already sensitive stomach. 

“Could be better,” you respond with a sigh. “I feel pain... everywhere. And I’m tired but I can’t sleep,” you add between spoonfuls. Omega nods, letting you rant as he silently listens to you while subtly observing the way your chest heaves up and down, as if your lungs were working overtime to accommodate to an elevated heart rate. 

He hums, dipping the spoon in the bowl to feed you again. You shake your head at him and put a hand up in front of your mouth, your brows creasing your forehead. The clone doesn’t push further and instead hands Iota the unfinished bowl of food, quietly asking for him to put it away. The young boy nods eagerly, happy to be of use as he scurries away. Delta follows after him to make sure he doesn’t break anything, but glances behind his shoulder to take one last look at you, worry obvious on his usually irked face. 

“How long has it been since Prime has last given your previous dose of aspirin?” he asks, leaning closer to you to push your hair out of your face. Expression scrunched up in discomfort from the sudden food intake, you make a noise of discontentment, a vague answer to his question. He frowns but doesn’t voice his displeasure aloud, instead comforting you through your nausea. Noticing pearls of sweat beading up on your hairline, Omega pulls your bed sheets away slightly, making you more comfortable. 

“Can you try swallowing for me?” he asks gently, tilting his head forward and to the side to look at your throat. It takes you a hot second but after some struggle you do as he instructed and swallow, your throat bobbing up as you do, and the segment hums in satisfaction. “Good,” he murmurs quietly, placing one hand on your shoulder to help you straighten your back. 

“Let me help you up. Hold onto my hand for me?” Omega asks, helping you slip out of bed, putting a strong arm under yours to help you stand up. You wordlessly interlock your fingers into his own and wobble slightly, knees weak and devoid of strength, but he holds you up, bending his own knees slightly to accommodate your height. The wave of nausea comes and goes, making your legs unsteady as the clone helps you walk towards the bathroom connected to your bedroom. 

Delta comes back without Iota in tow and immediately notices your discomfort. His legs work faster than his mind and he’s to your left in the blink of an eye, supporting your weight as well to help you and Omega out. The three of you reach the sink counter and as the oldest helps you sit up on it, Delta squints at his fellow clone. 

“Can one of you get my bucket,” you manage to croak out between deep breaths, head slumped forward to rest against Omega’s shoulder. While he rubs soothing circles on your back Delta quickly grabs the bucket you kept in your room, footsteps as silent as he could as to not disturb you. You murmur a quiet thank you to him, sitting up to the best of your ability as you shoot him a grateful smile. 

“Are you feeling well enough to bathe or are you still lightheaded?” Omega asks, one of his gloved hands coming up to your forehead. He feels some heat seep through the leather fabric but waits for your answer nonetheless, crimson eyes covered by his mask staring into you. You nod, leaning into the coolness of his hand. 

“Mmhyeah, jus’ help me out a bit,” you mumble sleepily, exhaustion taking over your nausea. Delta doesn't need to be told twice as he turns on the tap to fill up the bath, keeping a hand beneath it to make the sound of water splashing in the tub quieter to avoid bothering you. 

✧✧✧   

With a towel resting over your head and newfound energy flowing through your limbs, you saunter into your partner’s main lab to find him. Omega had left shortly after you finished bathing, begrudgingly telling you that he had to go back to work- but Delta stayed with you long enough to keep you company while you let your eyes rest. He gave you some painkillers- nothing like what Dottore gave you to keep the pain at bay, but it worked as a temporary solution- and you felt energized enough to leave your bedroom to get ahold of Dottore. 

Delta walked behind you, not wanting to go back to the laboratory just yet but the last thing he wanted was to leave you alone, his mind working up a multitude of scenarios in which you’d get hurt. Although he was all bark and no bite, he still cared about you immensely- more than he’d ever admit. He watches your hair drip water onto the pristine white tiles as you walk and steps on the water with his boots, smudging the liquid to wipe it away. 

“Dottore!” you exclaim happily, eyes lighting up when you finally catch sight of the familiar mop of blue hair paired with his matching tired eyes and scarred skin adorning his face. The Harbinger looks up from his work, eyes displaying a mix of surprise and something akin to irritation- a result from catching him off guard. 

“Darling,” he says softly, quietly enough that you barely catch the loving nickname slipping past his chapped lips. “Did you eat?” he asks, brushing the dirt off his hands on his slacks. You engulf his torso in a warm hug, immediately comforted by the familiar faint scent of his cologne and whatever cleaning supply he used in his lab. He returns the hug gently and Delta looks away immediately, flustered at the sight of his boss being publicly affectionate. 

You respond with a muffled mhm, refusing to pull away. “Didn’t eat much but it was something. Omega ‘n Delta helped me bathe. Took something for the pain. Now I’m here,” you summarize, face still smushed against him. He hums in approval, but concern still creases his brows as he uses one of his hands to rub up your back and the other to dry off your hair completely using the towel on your head. Delta murmurs an excuse before leaving the premises, not able to withstand the pda. 

“You shouldn’t be out of bed,” he says sternly but softly. “I’m working on something that’ll help you in the long run, it’ll do you good to allow your body to recuperate as much as it can. Have you been sleeping alright?” 

You slump against him. Of course he’d notice how tired you were even if he couldn’t see your face. 

“...No,” you mumble. He doesn’t respond, but you feel his head moving as he looks around his workspace, seemingly looking for something. He lets out a quiet aha when he does and he brings his arms down to your shoulders to push you away. 

“I have something you can take to help you sleep. You shouldn’t feel nauseous nor dizzy when you take it as well,” Dottore says, immediately talking about the possible complications before you can even open your mouth to refuse his offer. “I tested it out myself,” he adds, lips curling into a small smile when he sees your face change from a pout to bewilderment. 

“You? The great Dottore, ex-scholar of the Akademiya, willingly taking medication to make him sleep? You never get rest, and you expect me to believe you when you talk about sleeping medication?” you say with an amused scoff. Dottore raises a brow at your teasing but doesn’t comment on it, instead he chooses to brush his pointer finger’s knuckle beneath your eyes. 

“You should believe me because I never get rest, my love,” he says fondly. “And because your dark circles are so prominent, I could probably see them from the other side of the laboratory.” he adds. You huff but lean into his touch, eyes drooping from the burst of energy catching up on your body. You hear him chuckle under his breath as he shifts his body to grab the medication in question and a syringe with a sterilized needle, preparing the equipment to administer it to you. 

“If you get an adequate amount of rest, I’ll take two days off work to take care of you properly. How does that sound?” he asks lightly, flicking the syringe to let out any air bubbles out. You look away with furrowed brows and roll your eyes, but still give him your arm. 

“Now you’re just trying to bait me,” you say, looking at him from the corner of your eyes. He shrugs, not arguing with your accusation because you were technically right. When he’s done with the syringe you feel his arms wrap around you, the warmth of his body making you sigh pleasantly. 

You can’t tell what it is that makes your body grow so incredibly tired so suddenly; if it was the medication, the strain on your body or if it was because you just felt that comfortable in Dottore’s arms, but you didn’t really care. As you felt Dottore move you to one of his couches, you reach out to grab onto his sleeve to keep him nearby. 

He complies, crouching to be at your level as you crack your eyes open to look at him. You murmur a quiet love you and shut your eyes contentedly, smiling softly once you feel his lips make contact with your forehead as you hear him clearly say I love you too back. 

[variousqueerthings]

after 3 straight days of queer movie-watching at the festival (with an interlude to play some football) and my brain being overloaded with Stimulus, feel like I need to compile my thoughts on the experience overall: 

1. lotta DIY work, which is a great reminder that if you want to make, you can + opens up conversation around how institutions do not fund this kind of work (in the UK especially there’s a limit to spaces one can go for funding). the real experimentation/cinematic bravery isn’t happening for half a billion dollars, it’s being done on a shoe-string budget. that being said, one really wishes there was more money to be had in this, simply because it would make people able to live off the work and make much more

2. lot of sports-related stuff, both fiction and documentary, which is funny considering where a lot of my own focus is these days. also got to meet Verity Smith, which was a bit of a hero-moment, and he gave a lot of great info on the state of sports nationally and internationally. and yeah, I got to play football for the first time in 10 years!

3. generally met a lot of great people. I think the idea about “networking” as it’s been presented to me as an artist (including the word itself) is still a big problem, and will always be. it’s got too many concepts baked into it that don’t gel with the kind of work I do in the communities I do it in + my particular flavour of brain, but that being said -- once I realised that there are spaces where meeting/connecting with people in your specific field of work, where this aligns with queer practise of shared needs for what that work represents and is for, then yeah, I kind of got what networking was all about. So I could talk freely about my own work + listen to theirs, and not feel like we were just sussing out how we could use one another to get ahead 

when I was studying, there wasn’t this kind of... idk, discussion of ways that working in an arts industry -- with all of its [waves hands at the microcosm of any and all industries and life that is in the mainstream run by capitalist colonialist patriarchy] many many issues -- can be interacted with from different perspectives, so it’s neat to be able to find ways to do that by simply being in spaces like these

4. watched both wildhood and set it off as my main two fiction features (the others I either couldn’t make it for or missed parts of due to overlapping events). the former feels like a wonderful breath of air + fits into a space of both canadian first nations cinema that I’ve been lucky enough to get to watch, and queer cinema. the movies are getting made and they are good -- one does have to look for them/be active in spaces where they would likely be disseminated, which tbh is also an ethos of artistic engagement + community engagement that I’m very in favour of anyway. in order to get to the deeper stuff, it doesn’t do to simply sit back and wait for it to arrive. it does exist! go find it! 

also the sex scene in it was 👀👀👀 smthinsmthin water as metaphor belongs to the queers

also I’d been wanting to watch set it off for ages, as (only?) the second lesbian crime movie, next to bound. set it off isn’t technically centred on lesbians, but one of the leads is openly shown to be a stud/butch, and she’s respected/liked by her friends. I’m curious about how this film feels to the Black lesbian community and perhaps Black film-goers as a whole, since [spoilers] it’s got a fair bit of police violence and very little in the way of happy endings. 

where I sit with it, is that it’s criminally (ha) underrated and oughta be discussed in the same breath of compelling characters that exist in heat and dog day afternoon -- the bittersweet-at-best tragic ending fits with the general tone of this specific take on the genre (the non-oceans-movies versions tend to have mixed-to-tragic endings), although the violence does hit closer to home/more realistically than in most other heist films. and all the main characters are So So Cool, which is important for a good heist film! 

5. also got to watch two documentaries about older queers, one about the history of the Chicago bar “sidetrack” and the other about older queer people in Ireland. These connections and stories are so vital, and queer-cinema-as-documentation feels like one of the most queer things one can do. We love a documentary, because we’re trying to make sure those connections are built, that we don’t forget our pasts, that we have roots. there are people from whom we have these torches passed, and they’re our elders, even across continents.

also thank you to that lesbian couple acknowledging that young people are really struggling with money in this modern capitalism. definitely feels like it puts the work of the festival I was at into perspective -- with spaces closing and difficulty in renting (especially in cities), we need to find ways to open up spaces for one another

6. also I had a little curated archive piece up there and people said nice things to me about it 😭😭😭

[deafeninggardenerpanda]

“PIRKA!!!!” Kirby shouted as loudly as he could. One by one, Pirka picked up a stone and threw it away. The dammed-up water flowed out, little by little.

“Stop, Pirkaaa!!” Kirby screamed. However, Pirka wouldn’t stop. The streaming water increased in force as the stone pile crumbled. On the opposite shore, Coo and Kine, Rick, and Gooey, as they fought, held their breath in fear. Coo groaned.

“The water, the Rainbow Islands-!! We’re too late!!”

“Everyone’s gonna become a puppet~?! Even my wife~?!” Kine said as he flopped around.

“It can’t be true, right!?!” Rick screamed. “Even Pick’s gonna forget about me, and she’s gonna become Pirka’s slave!?!”

Gooey didn’t say anything. However, with sad eyes, he continued to evade King Dedede’s attacks. Kirby stopped moving. While hovering above the surface of the lake, simply staring at the flowing water. He had just one thought on his mind:

“...I’ve gotta do something about this.

If this water rains down on everyone, it’ll be a disaster.

I’ve... GOTTA DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS!!”

But what would he do? He had absolutely no clue what. Either way, he couldn’t let that water rain down. One by one, all of his friends on the Rainbow Islands that were waiting for his and the others’ return came to mind. Bandana Waddle Dee, Captain Vul, the Meta-Knights, Pick, Mine…

He couldn’t let them all fall under Pirka’s control.

He couldn’t let them become empty-eyed puppets, unable to do anything unless ordered.

He could never… HE COULD NEVER!

Kirby raised both arms and took a deep breath. Then, he held his head up. He spread his arms and inhaled with all his strength.

“Haaaaa-!”

A strong wind broke out.

Pirka looked back in surprise and hurriedly folded her wings.

“What’re you doing!?! Don’t get in my way!!!”

“HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!”

No longer thinking about what he was doing, Kirby kept inhaling.

He sucked up all of the overflowing water.

Not one drop would fall to the ground!

“What are you thinking!?” Coo screamed. “Kirby, stop!!”

“No way, you’re sucking up all of the lake water?! Why would you do that?!”

“If Kirby sucks up the water, he’s gonna fall under Pirka’s control!!” Kine shouted tearfully. “It’s no use, not at all!!”

Kirby shut his eyes. It hurt to breathe. He felt as if he were going to burst.

However, he wouldn’t stop sucking.

The water that was going to rain to the ground was sucked into Kirby’s mouth.

“HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-!!!”

*Fwoooooooosh!*

The lakewater roared, swirled, and sprayed.

“Wh-Wh-What are you doiiiing!?”

Pirka clung to the clouds, frantically trying to resist. Kirby sucked up the water, which had become a torrent.

*Fwooooooooooooooooosh!*

Meandering as if it were a living thing, into Kirby’s mouth the water went. The former lake was now devoid of water, to the point where the bottom could be seen.

“Kirby!!!” Rick, Kine, Coo, and Gooey exclaimed as they watched. Kirby had sucked up all of the water in the lake. He had already reached his limit. Kirby hung his head, dejected.

“KIRBY!!!” the group screamed again. Kirby fell unconscious, falling to the bottom of the lake with no energy.

Rick ran toward Kirby as quickly as he could. Kine followed. Coo suddenly noticed something.

“Meta Knight? King Dedede?”

The pair, unknowingly, had stopped moving.

“Have you two come to your senses?”

The two didn’t answer Coo’s question. However, as if they had lost strength in their hands, their grips on their weapons loosened.

“Kirby, snap out of it! Kirby!!”

“Kirby, open your eyes~!”

Rick and Kine called out to Kirby, trying to shake him awake. Appearing to be in pain, his face formed a frown. That was not all. It seemed that tears were about to spill from his closed eyes.

Neither Rick nor Kine had ever seen Kirby’s face like this before.

“Kirby looks like he’s in a lot of pain~. Should we get him to spit out all that water~?”

“No, there’s no way that Kirby fit all that water in his stomach.”

“Guess that’s right~. Well, where did all the water go then?”

“I have no clue. Kirby’s stomach is full of mysteries.”

“Hey, Rick…” Kine said with anxiety, “when Kirby starts to fall under Pirka's control, what’re we gonna do?”

Rick’s expression stiffened.

“D-Don’t say scary stuff like that! If Kirby fell under her control, there’s no way we’d be able to manage!”

“I-I know, right? What’re we gonna do~?”

“It’ll be alright, probably! After all, Gooey drank the water and he was completely fine!”

“Gooey and Kirby aren’t the same~. Besides, Gooey didn’t drink that much of the water, while Kirby drank the whole lake~!”

“I told you to stop saying scary things!!”

As the two were talking, Kirby opened his eyes. Rick and Kine stared at Kirby, startled. His painful look disappeared without a trace. He rubbed his eyes with an absent-minded face.

“K-K-Kirby,” Rick said in a trembling voice, “are you ok?”

“Y-Yeah… Rick… Kine…” Kirby said in a half-asleep voice, “dinner time already?... thanks for the meal…”

“Wow! You’re alright!” Classic Kirby~.”

Kine jumped up and down happily. Rick, still startled, poked Kirby.

“Come on... we were so worried! You took a big risk there!”

“Big risk?’ Wha-”

Kirby finally remembered what happened. He jolted up, and, looking around the area, saw that the scene above the clouds had completely changed. The lake water was gone, leaving the cloudy bottom viewable. Kirby rapidly blinked.

“Did I drink all of that water?...”

Uh-huh, Kirby. How are you feeling?”

Kirby rubbed his tummy. It was the same way it always was. Kirby had no idea in the least of where the water he had sucked up went. However, at any rate, he was able to save the Rainbow Islands from a serious crisis. Kirby sweetly smiled.

“The puppet water didn’t rain down! That’s good!”

“You’re OK? Didn’t that hurt?”

“Yup! I’m just fine!”

“Really? Before you woke up, it looked like you were in a lotta pain, and you had a really sad face~.”

“Pain? Me? Well…” Kirby was saying when, suddenly, he changed the topic, "what happened to Pirka?”

“Huh? Oh, now that you mention it…”

Rick looked over at where the pile of stones used to be. Gooey was there. He had Pirka caught in his long tongue. Pirka appeared to have lost the energy to fight back, exhausted.

“Looks like Gooey dealt with her at some point!”

Rick was about to run, when…

“Are you alright, Kirby?”

Coo flew in, landing behind Kirby. Kirby nodded.

“Yeah, I’m just fine!”

“Kirby sucked up the lakewater, but he didn’t fall under the puppet potion’s effects~!” Kine reported. Coo sighed in relief.

“It’s really weird,” Rick said, “both Meta Knight and King Dedede fell under Pirka’s control, but Kirby’s completely fine. Is Kirby idiosyncratic like Gooey is?“

“Rather than that-”

Coo fixed his gaze on the puzzled-looking Kirby.

“Would Kirby’s heart not be too soft for the puppet spell to work with it?”

“...?”

“Meta Knight and King Dedede hold very powerful wills, but such things may leave their hearts easy to take hold of. Kirby’s mind is very ‘fluffy’ by contrast, not dealing with a lack of love. Rather, I’d say it may contain nothing but love.”

Rick and Kine blinked in bewilderment at the enigmatic words.

“What do you mean?”

Coo shut his eyes and answered:

“As they say… The rugged stones can be grasped tightly and swung or thrown with ease. However, the things that don’t have a set shape- for instance, the spring breeze- cannot be grasped. It’s something like that.”

“Umm?...”

Rick and Kine exchanged glances.

“Is that an allegory or something? Is Kirby the spring breeze?”

“Coo’s story is confusing~.”

Coo opened his eyes.

“Well, not even I truly understand its meaning. At any rate, Kirby’s thoughts always center around food, naps, friends, and overall fun, things which are not compatible with Pirka’s spell.”

“Oh, I get it now!”

Rick and Kine broke into laughter. Kirby, a little miffed, objected:

“Hey!! Some things are a little bit hard for me to think about!!”

"Like what?”

“Well… umm… ummmmmmmm-!”

“Don’t think too hard about it,” Coo said (while chuckling) to Kirby, who was giving himself a headache by trying to think of something, “you’re just fine. Onto more important matters, the strange state of those two over there.”

Coo raised his wing. Under the Dreamstalk look-alike tree, Meta Knight and King Dedede were standing. Both of them stood motionlessly with Pirka, as if they had become statues.

“What’re those guys doing? Pirka’s spell still isn’t broken?”

“No. While they do not seem to be in the mood for fighting anymore, they have yet to move from that spot. It’s as if their souls have been ripped from their bodies.”

Kirby and the others hurried toward the two.

“Meta Knight! King Dedede!” they called, but to no response. The two stood stock still, silently.

“What happened?...”

“Maybe we should try tickling them?”

Rick tickled Dedede’s stomach, but the king didn’t even blink.

“The spell’s effects still haven’t worn off,” Coo muttered. There, Gooey came along unsteadily. He still had Pirka caught in his tongue.

“Hey you, Pirka,” Rick said in a rough tone, “your evil plan has failed! Let Meta Knight and King Dedede go right now!"

“...I don’t know,” Pirka said in a sulky voice.

“What’s that?”

“I said I don’t know how to undo the spell!”

“You little-!!”

Kirby stopped the belligerent Rick.

“Hold on, Rick. Let’s hear what Pirka has to say.”

“What else could she even tell us-!?”

“Didn’t she say she doesn’t know how to undo the spell? Let’s hear what else she has to say.”

“What then?”

Pirka glared at Kirby with cold eyes.

“I won’t tell you foul people anything!!”

“But I wanna know!”

“Know what?” Pirka asked, seeming irritated.

“How you feel,” Kirby answered.

“...feelings? Mine?”

“When I drank the lakewater, it really hurt.”

Kirby looked up at Pirka, who still had Gooey’s tongue wrapped around her.

“I thought it hurt because I drank so much water, but that wasn’t the reason, was it?”

“...what are you trying to say?”

For some reason, Pirka seemed anxious.

“That’s how you felt… wasn’t it?” Kirby said.

“What do you mean?”

“In the lakewater, it wasn’t just the puppet potion, but your feelings were mixed in there too, weren’t they?”

Pirka opened her eyes wide and fell silent. Gooey loosened his grip until he dropped Pirka onto the cloudy ground.

“Wh-What are you talking about?” Pirka asked, hesitantly. “None of that is true!”

“Why won’t you stop being so stubborn and speak to us?” Coo asked. “If you tell us everything, that will likely clear a few things up. You carry a great pain with you.”

“Wh-What!? How am I in pain!?...”

Pirka tried to retort, but, seeing Coo’s sharp gaze fixed on her, quietly said:

“...what should I say? I have nothing to talk-”

No one had anything to say. Pirka, closing her eyes, said:

“I… just… wanted...”

“What?”

“All I wanted was to be like the great Queen Sectonia…”

“...WHAT?!”

Upon hearing such an expected name, Kirby was surprised. Pirka continued muttering.

“Queen Sectonia is the name the great queen that had ruled over Floralia went by. I know, you don’t know her, but-”

“I know her! I do!”

Pirka was unaware that the person who stopped Queen Sectonia and saved Floralia was none other than Kirby. Pirka glanced at Kirby and laughed.

“Sure you know. You’ve never even heard her name before. The great queen was a truly magnificent being.”

“...u-um-”

“However, the almighty, great Queen Sectonia was defeated by someone and never seen again. Such a sad ending.”

“W-Well-”

It seemed better not to say that Kirby was the one to defeat her. Pirka tightly grasped her own hand.

“When I learned of the incident that happened in Floralia, my heart was absolutely shaken. Then, as I researched, I increasingly longed to be like the great Queen Sectonia.”

“...wh-why?”

“What do you mean ‘why?’ Don’t ask such foolish questions!” Pirka said in flat denial. “There’s no one who can match her in beauty, strength, and nobility. Moreover, she ruled over many people, and everyone revered her!”

Pirka, spellbound, shut her eyes.

“How wonderful. To have tens of thousands of people obey one’s every whim. Nobody could defy the great queen’s orders. Everyone would get what they want. If only… If only I could be like her!”

“And that’s why you came up with such a plan?” Coo asked, astounded. “How foolish."

“What’s so foolish about it!?” Pirka retorted, raising her eyes sternly. “If it weren’t for you people getting in my way, things would’ve been perfect!”

Rick scowled at Pirka.

“You idiot! A true queen doesn’t use a spell to establish her rule. No one would respect someone like that, and, if the spell gets undone, they’d all just hate you, wouldn’t they!?”

“!!”

Pirka grimaced, as if she had gotten hit in some kind of weak point.

“Th-That’s fine by me! Anyway, I wanted to be like the great Queen Sectonia, so I visited the floating continent of Floralia. I understood that the great queen was no longer there, but I at least wanted to see the great castle where she once lived. So, I met a former servant of hers, and we had a conversation together!”

Pirka, once again, had a spellbound look on her face.

“He told me a wonderful tale of how amazing the great queen was. More and more, I yearned for that strength. But, how could I be like the great Queen Sectonia?... while thinking of ideas, I came up with a wonderful plan!”

“What plan?”

“They say that once, the great Queen Sectonia parasitized a mysterious plant known as the Dreamstalk, and took its power. If I utilized that power, maybe I could get closer to that goal. They say that the Dreamstalk disappeared after the battle, but I traveled from star to star, and, finally, found a small sapling!”

Pirka turned to look at the tree growing by the former-lake.

“That was a Dreamstalk after all, huh?” Kirby said. “But its color is weird. The real Dreamstalk-”

“I know. When I planted that tree, it was a nice green color. However, when I applied my spell, it changed color…”

“That’s the color of your heart,” Rick said, leading Pirka to glare at him.

“I know that!! The puppet spell I originally casted was much inferior in comparison to the great Queen Sectonia’s!! In just a few hours, the effects would wear off. However, with the Dreamstalk’s power, my spell’s power could increase tremendously! Moreover, If I let it fall down on the world in rain form, I would be able to gain control of many, many people at once! I know, such a wonderful idea."

“It’s a wicked idea,” Coo said, “if Gooey hadn’t noticed, things would’ve been disastrous.”

“...humph!”

Pirka puffed up her cheeks.

“That’s all I have to say. Hope you’re happy. Beat me up, tie me up, you should banish me to the depths of the cosmos.”

Coo looked at Kirby.

“What shall we do, Kirby?”

“...Pirka…”

Kirby walked up to Pirka.

“Now that I’ve heard your story, I get it.”

Pirka jumped.

“Wh-What? What do you get?”

“You said your puppet spell is weak on its own. Does that mean… you’ve used it on others before?”

Pirka turned pale. She tried to retort, but no words came out of her mouth. She trembled.

“Everyone did whatever you said but then the spell wore off. And then…”

It was as Rick said. When the spell wore off, everyone would go back to normal, and they’d hate Pirka. They’d be scared of it, so she’d use the spell again. Then, again, the spell would wear off, and they’d hate Pirka even more…

As the cycle repeated, people would stop getting close to her.

Kirby remembered. When he drank the lakewater, the pain. The sorrow. The loneliness. Were those feelings the shadow cast over Pirka’s heart?

For a moment, Pirka silently casted her eyes down. One by one, memories of those old days resurfaced. She looked on the verge of collapsing, her face as white as a sheet. Finally, large tears formed in her big eyes.

“I’m small, there’s nothing special about me, and I don’t have any friends, but… if I casted my spell… everyone would think I’m important. I did all of those things… so I could be happy…”

The tears spilled over and fell, drop by drop.

“But, because of that, everyone hated me. They were scared of me, they’d throw stones at me… when they saw me, they’d run away…”

Pirka’s crying voice grew louder and louder. The tears kept falling and falling and wouldn’t stop.

“That’s why I decided to cast a spell that could never be broken. With the power of the Dreamstalk… so that great numbers of people would revere me for all eternity!...”

“Pirka,” Kirby said. Pirka wiped her many tears and glared at him.

“Like you said, it’s foolish!! I get it!!”

“It’s more fun to be a friend than a great queen.”

Upon hearing Kirby’s words, Pirka shook her head furiously.

“I don’t need any friends!”

“Pirka-”

“Friends would betray me, we’d get into fights, and, soon, they’d cast me aside. However, puppet subjects would never do such a thing. They’d never hurt me!”

“If you get into fights, you can just make up, can’t you? Being a great queen’s no fun at all.”

“Silence! I… I-”

“LET’S BE FRIENDS!!!”

Kirby offered his hand. Pirka was flustered.

“Hey, Kirby,” Rick said, “you’re way too nice for your own good. Don’t you know what she did?-”

“Let’s be friends!”

Kirby kept insisting. Despite the atrocities she had committed, Kirby held no hatred for Pirka. Because Kirby knew. About Pirka’s painful memories. That loneliness, no one there for comfort, as if frozen.

“Friends?... w-with… me?...”

Until recently, Pirka, who had been ghastly pale until just a short while ago, had turned red.

“You’re lying, right? Kirby, do you understand? I’m the bad guy who cast the puppet spell!!”

“It’s OK. I don’t mind!”

“Me too!”

Gooey reached out his tongue. Pirka looked down with a white face.

“...good grief,” Coo said, “I, until just a short while ago, would never have been able to forgive Pirka. However, Kirby seems to have caused her to undergo a change of heart.”

Pirka looked up. Rick and Kine exchanged looks. Rick kicked the clouds hard.

“I-I’m… I’m Kirby’s friend!” he said. “So, if you become his friend too, well… I should be your friend too!”

“Me too~. If you get rid of your puppet spell, I’ll be your friend~.”

Nevertheless, Pirka continued to stubbornly shake her head in refusal.

“I don’t need friends. I don’t want anything like that!”

“Tell the truth, Pirka.”

“You should understand your own true wishes by now,” Coo said.

“Wishes?...”

“If you really don’t need friends, then why did you cry?”

Pirka averted her eyes.

“Wh… Why…?...”

“In front of Kirby, you didn’t lie, and you shed tears. Drowning in an everlasting pool of loneliness must’ve been unbearable for you. That’s how you truly feel.”

Pirka fraily shook her head. Once again, tears overflowed from her big eyes. She could no longer continue being stubborn.

“...yes,” she said in a faint voice, “I was jealous of you guys. Believing in each other, helping each other, laughing with each other… things I… couldn’t have. Things I thought I… couldn’t have… it hurt… but… but… really…”

She looked up, tightly shut her eyes, and shouted with all her strength:

“I want… I want… I… WANT TO BE FRIENDS WITH YOU!!!”

...then, suddenly, the sound of water could be heard.

< Previous | Table of Contents | Next >

[phoebehalliwell]

if you could give 3 positive and 3 negative personality traits to each of the next gen, what would they be?

ooh love it. okay. we know i talk a lot. A Lot. i’m doing this in waves. first set of siblings under the cut (wcm). 2.9k. ily!

wyatt i think it’s say kind bc like. he genuinely tries really hard to be a nice person. considerate which is kind of the same as kind but again he like. he knows the elders almost killed him as a little kid he knows there’s a world where he does go dark side and that does weigh on him, so he tries to put other’s feelings first as much as possible. and then third positive trait ummmm generous which again is kinda all in the same category but it’s like. like wyatt is insanely talented not just like as a witch tho he’s that too he’s also like really smart but he’s not a dick about it he’s one of those kids who’s always like i’ll help u with your homework! what r u doing after school later! like. he has a wealth of knowledge and he doesn’t just sit on it he likes to share. this is one of the reasons henry jr is also so close with wyatt because like. they both share this genuine love and interest in the study of like old magicks so to speak like. histories of witches and demons etc most classes the rest of the next gen honestly find kinda boring. on the flipside his negative traits would be like um a tendency to play by the book he’s a little too strict not because he necessarily believes in it but more again he wants to stay in line so as not to get you know. murdered or w/e. another negative trait is a i would say wyatt gets like way too overattached, especially in relationships, but it’s not limited to that. yes he’s a jump then fall guy & i’ve written about this before (multiple times), but i also think it’s the same with like innocents. like the fact of the matter is is that you literally cannot save anyone but wyatt has never and will never learn to accept that and i think he gets. he takes it real hard whenever he loses somebody and gets really pissy and closed off in the aftermath. a third negative trait is like. overprotective. like. in my writings he’s not the twice blessed anymore but he’s still wicked powerful, and he’s also like. the eldest. so he kind of feels this burden to protect his family. it doesn’t help that throughout their youth like chris ever the demon hunter always sought out trouble and leo who Really Didn’t Want To Watch Chris Die Again kind of always passed on whatever the mission was to wyatt. which, yeah, gave chris issues, but it also gave wyatt issues! because in his head, it really is his responsibility to handle these things for his family. and, yes, sometimes he can relinquish this power a little bit like not actively hover over his family while they’re demon hunting, but if he’s not you know. actively there, he’s either scrying or he’s sensing (if he can do that idk) and just. he’s got this feeling that anything bad that happens to his family is his fault. like he has this great power, so if someone gets hurt, like, he should have been there because he definitely could have stopped it. however, this energy kinda harshes everyone else’s buzz, which is why the other tend not to involve wyatt in their plotlines too much.

moving on to chris who just for the record i already wrote for but thanks to the beauty of this site i accidentally clicked the wrong button & now it's gone. so. take two! i don't remember what i said. okay so first trait i'm giving him is. i honest to god cannot remember what i said previously no wait that's a lie because i remember now because it was interesting. because i think chris is interesting, and i think that's a good thing. because like. i wouldn't describe him as likeable i would not say he has the personality trait of Likable™ because like. he doesn't. but people still really like him. because he is interesting. like they see him and go huh wow i wanna know what's going on there all in all i think people kinda gravitate towards him. but of course flipside i think he doesn't necessarily choose to become friends with everyone who approaches him i think he tends to be a bit picky just because you know he's so guarded so i think he has friends but no like. really super close friends. so like first negative trait is he kinda appears aloof because i mean. he's kinda gotta lotta issues you know and it's not something you can really easily explain to someone non-magical because magic is so deeply ingrained into who he is (which also adds to the aloofness because there are just certain topics he'll drop certain things he just won't talk about and its not because he doesn't care or anything it's just like. that's a really big reveal and rather that spin some elaborate web of lies i think chris just like straight up does the i can't tell you that bit, which makes him seem you know well like aloof kinda a little bit dickish). and then of course there's also like. like a lot of vulnerability involved in understanding who chris is he really doesn't have any middle layers nothing that sits between the surface mortal chris and the charmed chris with an inferiority complex it's either you know it all or you know. he just seems aloof. but again like. i think he's interesting. so much so that a lot of people are just kinda willing to look past that. so like. a lot of just external relationships. surface level. & then another defining trait of his on the positive side is clever. because like. he's smart. like i think he's a really skilled witch i think he's an excellent spellcaster and then like. i also think he can do math and stuff (in my fic he is a coder so like. yeah.) but i think it's kind of beyond just like Oh He's Smart i think it's the way he applies his brains applies his knowledge that really kind of sets him apart from the rest i think he really is clever. and then third positive i think chris is resourceful. i think like. i think he likes to have a sense of indepence away from his family because like. i mean he is a halliwell and he doesn’t shy away from that but at the same time he doesn’t really want to like. lean on that rest on well the thing is it’s not even his laurels to rest on. he wants to have this sense of independence and he’s actually p good at getting it. like i having him living on his own (so 2 speak, he has like. 4 roommates? i’m p sure) and yeah he’s not super great at it from just like. a living perspective you know but he’s making it i think like paying his own rent all that and yeah like the food he eats isn’t great and his room is kind of always a disaster but like. he’s made it p far i think a lot farther than people thought he could no disrespect. so i think he's really able to take what lifes gives him and make the most out of it i don't think he likes to coast by on others' accomplishments. which kinda segues into the second negative trait which i think you probably could guess he's overly-independent like independent to a fault. because like. i think he really wants to define himself with kinda comes in a two-fold way because like. okay in-family he wants to. okay so like obvi, there's a major drop off in power between him and wyatt. and i think he's always kinda been insecure about it think what on earth caused such a cosmic fuck up that he's just a telekinetic and then his brother is like. a baby god. so i think chris really feels this need to prove himself worth of a place in the warren line like cement his skills as and really say you know i deserve this title. and then flipside!! he really doesn't want to rely on titles you know he doesn't want respect because he's a charmed one or because he's a halliwell he wants respect off his own merits he wants people to know him by his actions not the legacy he carries. (also maybe gives reason for chris to occasionally use the name chris perry in the altered timeline??) and then. kind of building off that negative trait for his third one i'm saying listless because like. i think the crucial difference between the chris from the dark timeline and chris from the light timeline is like. darktl!chris has always had purpose. like yes it's a shitty purpose it's a burden it's too much to place on one boy but he is the last halliwell you know it's like basically all on him to stop wyatt from you know annihilating the world. (someone should probably tell him the cupitches exist in the dark future lmao) you know from like very very early on in his life darktl!chris has known he's destined for something big and honestly he might fail but he's gotta give it the ole college try because this is the world on his shoulders he's gotta put up a good fight for it. lighttl!chris literally does not have that. he does not have some grand, epic purpose, some monumental destiny to fulfill and like. what is he supposed to do, you know? why is he here? and he feels like he should have some epic destiny hmm well no not exactly he wants some epic destiny but he feels like if there were some epic destiny to be had it'd probably pass over him in favor for something better just like everything else in his life does. like why is he here? literally why is he here i mean okay so like disclaimer is that chris in my story is like. 20/21 and um. also a college dropout lmao haha and like. call a spade a spade we're probz looking at some undiagnosed depression here like give him a zoloft he'll be fine but like. chris feels like he's kinda on a raft in the middle of open ocean in a sense like. the best option is to pick a direction and paddle and hope he reaches land but he's literally in open ocean there are no markers no indicators he doesn't know where to go and like. if he picks wrong he's just heading closer and closer to nothing at all emptiness death whatever And There's No Way To Know Which Way Is Towards Land. and if he fucks up, like, he's screwed. shout out to all my early twenty-somethings. woot woot. but yeah. i think chris really wants a sense of purpose that simply put he does not have and honestly? will not be getting. i am not giving him a prophecy. i am not giving him a destiny. he will have to live with that. and, at this point in his life, i think he's doing a p bad job at that. lmao.

melinda!! baby girl. angel. honestly? i'm going to give her kind too because i think a large part of her just really wants to help people. i've previously called her the most-whitelightery of the next gen, & then also she is currently going to school with designs to become a nurse because like. she's also an empath you know and i think she definitely has aspirations to kind of mix her magical and mortal sides find a balance of both worlds and use her magic powers to enhance how she can better care for people in a mortal way. i'd also say she's really understanding. like, she's the third sibling to the wyatt-chris duo And she's an empath like. even if she doesn't get it, she gets it. like. things are complicated relationships are complicated like she can literally feel all sides of the story whenever there's a wyatt-chris-leo argument and like. what? is only one of them right? is only one of them allowed to feel the way they feel? no. she gets it. she all kinda understands where they're coming from. she understands. and then third positive trait she's really loving. like she's not a person who's stingy with her love (in a platonic sense. i think it a romantic sense it gets a lot more complicated because like. as an empath on the first date well it's just too weird man and it's. it's not like she can't keep her feelings sorted it's just like knowing exactly how they feel about her….. like it's weird. pass.) but i think she really like. i think she loves her family i think she loves her friends like. ❤. wow. on the more negative side i think she kind of like. self sacrificial. like she'll goes to the ends of the earth for the people she loves before she ever stops to think about herself. she doesn't. like she won't self advocate she won't draw a line in the sand when it comes to the ones she loves she fails to um. to see how sometimes her needs might actually be more important that others like. like if she loves you she will walk until her feet bleed. like. you have to be real careful because like. if you ask her to do something like she'll do it you can tack on that "but it's fine if no you don't have to" because if she feels your need to have this task done she'll do it. it's for love. but it's not good. (she will also extend this to non-loved ones again if she feels their need their like desperate need because at the end of the day she's a giver. hey kinda like the giving tree. i think she loves that book.) i also think she's just a shade naive and i kind of hesitate to use that word because like. i feel like it implies kind of a lack of worldly experience and like. melinda has seen a lot. but i think she like really does kind of see the world through rose colored glass i think she believes that people are intrinsically good and want to help each other and um. this can kinda tee her up for a lot of heartbreak and/or disillusionment with the world when kinda the reality is placed there right before her and it just kind of blows. i think it kind of hurts fresh every time. and then a third and final negative trait i think she like takes on too much, from an emotional standpoint, and doesn't really give anything back. kinda the same as self-sacrificial, but like with a twist. like, yes, as established, she has a lot of love in her heart, and she will take on her friend's emotional burdens (as well as any other burdens they might have for her) but then kinda gives nothing in return. she's a bit guarded in a sense. because again. this all comes back to the empath thing. kind of build on the dating thing. you really get live feedback on what exactly they think about you when you unpack, and like. melinda can't take that. she's too in her head on how this directly impacts their view of her and then she's just reading them and not focusing on her own problems you know like. like ladies if you've ever hit like. 1:30 in the morning at a slumber party when shit starts going from hehehe chetoh doost lasdkajldf to like. i don't think i could ever reasonably get married because divorce has really been the only constant in my life and i genuinely don't think i could trust another person enough to tie myself to them legally.? that's melinda's mcfuckin time to shine i think she does play therapist/peacemaker like a lot she likes it because again. she likes helping people! especially the people she loves!! but um. she'll never partake the other direction she really doesn't like getting vulnerable herself because like. you know if your friends are lying to you like you say something really personal and then cap it off with a y'know? and they all go yeah totally but you can feel them going what,,, the fuck. no?? like. like melinda could not take that it has not happened to her yet (probably) but she's come up with the hypothetical and she could not take that. this doesn't really extend to family just because she knows them so long like oh what chris thinks she's lame? okay. wyatt thinks she's overreacting? yeah i know what i've seen buddyboy. & then. for the record. neither or her brothers would never think she is lame or overreacting even If melinda is being lame or overreacting because they just like wouldn't they know her too well. but melinda's def the person who comes up with worst case hypotheticals in regards to her relationship/empathy powers like. all the time.

[echonidae]

let’s talk commission stuff!

hey folks !!  so i’ve been reorganizing myself to get commissions back on track, and i’ve got some things i’d like to get your input on, if it isn't too much trouble !! ;v;

it’s a long one, so under the cut it goes sdfghghj

a slightly too long tl;dr because apparently this is a 10min read (i'm so sorry): commission revamp on the works! no date for it yet. gonna be easing myself back with just icons for a while at first (no date for that either thoug, not yet), then the revamp will be in full swing with all the other commission options, and the pricetable for them will be changed in the future as well. 

some questions: 

1) i’m rethinking commission types, is there anything you’d like to see as a new option?  2) considering i tend to open only a handful slots every batch, i'm thinking about implementing a waitlist (with a bit of a twist: it's split between Current Batch and Next Batch; a little more complicated than a regular ol' waitlist, allows me to get through some of the waitlist queue as work gets done). would that interest you or is it too much of a headache? 100% open to suggestions! 3) i’m organizing a board on trello for commission stuffs !! any suggestions or specific things you’d like to see there?

so! it’s already been over a year since i last opened commissions and i’d very much like to get back to them ;o; it’s been way too long! i miss working with you folks aaa

i don’t have a reopening date yet, but i’m planning on opening only icons for a while to ease back into the process. later on, i'll open the other commission options too. you see, i’m working on a full revamp of the whole thing, including the terms of service and that info image with the examples (because looking back, i think it no longer really represents my current style and how i really do commissions in terms of just... plain old rendering and polishing), so i’ll be working on new drawings and a new layout too, and all that good jazz :D

for full disclosure, along with this overhaul of the terms and such, i will be updating prices too c: i’m still working on the new values though, since i need to figure out what commission types/options the overhaul will have. which brings me to the first question here: what would you like to see as a commission option? for reference, here’s the og options:

(hoo i need to redo those examples *sweats*)

also, one more thing i’d like to note about this revamp situation: there isn’t a whole lot that’s changing really haha it’s just been a long, long time since i last did commissions, so i’m reviewing terms and i might change stuff that’s become outdated, or that needs clarification. if you’ve commissioned me before, the process itself is still the same so no worries! once the revamp is out, i’ll point out anything that has changed too c:

in regards to price changes, those first icon-only batches will be in their original price, and the new prices will only take effect once the revamp with the other options is out. it will be quite a while before until that, but if you have any concerns, feel free to message me any time ! either way, i’ll keep you folks posted !! i guess i also could post the new prices before implementing them, if that helps!

so, moving on! now to the waitlist situation <:3c as in, i’ve never had one, a while back someone asked if i did, and now that i’m reorganizing things, i’m wondering if it would be good to implement one :3c feel free to send any questions !! or suggestions!! i'm all ears!!!

usually i only open a handful of slots for each batch, right, and once they're all claimed, the commissions are closed until all the slots are finished. folks who missed the slots have to wait until the next batch, and sometimes those batches take a while to come back, and i usually just message those who missed the opening once the new batch is announced.

what i'm thinking for the waitlist is, i'll open it along with the batch of commissions, and limit it to a specific number of spots or close it by a specific date, whichever comes first. to apply for it, people would just need to send the form and i can tell them immediately whether or not i can draw their request, and then they'll be placed on the waitlist in the order they’ve been accepted c: pretty standard stuff.

here’s the important bit: that list is basically split in two. the first handful of people on the list, corresponding to the amount of slots for the current batch, will be reached out to as i finish working on the claimed slots, and then anyone else on the waitlist will be contacted shortly before the next batch. if, by the time the list closes, not all the opened slots have been claimed, folks on the list will simply be moved up the queue accordingly c: all of it would be discussed individually, of course, and very well disclosed in the commission info!

there are other points to it as well: anyone would be able to request a spot on the next batch's waitlist instead of the current one, and anyone can leave either list at any point. folks who had already claimed a slot when it first opened would only be able to apply for the next batch's waitlist (to give everyone a chance of getting one), and people on the list, either for the current or the next round of commissions, can be skipped up to a limit if they're unable to continue the order once i get to them.

oh and, before i forget, with the waitlist in place, i think i’d no longer be able to put slots on hold as i used to (as in, before paying the first invoice), as it’d be unfair to folks on the list. in that case, the person would be placed on the list as well if they want to, and contacted as soon as possible : )

also the "up to 2 slots per person" thing would be on thin ice too haha

anyway, this is kind of what i intended to do back then, with reopening slots as work gets finished, but never got around to. i want to make sure i don’t swamp myself with work, but also have it so that folks who want slots have a good chance of getting them, whether for the current batch or the next, as there's only so many slots i can open and work on at once, and time zones and irl things are to be considered too for anyone interested c:

it also makes it easier for me to keep track of messaging folks about new slots and such, and the list would be made public and easily available for consulting too : D more on this later!

so how's this looking? i've never done waitlists before and barely knew how they're supposed to work before starting to reorganize things, so please do feel free to voice your thoughts !! i’m 100% open to suggestions !!! do you think this system would work out for you? any concerns? if anything is unclear feel free to point it out, i'll do my best to explain the process or change stuff that doesn't quite work!!

so!!! now to the very last thing i wanted to talk about ! trello! 

i’m making a little trello board for updates on commission stuff! my commission info page here on tumblr and on deviantart both have this little section for updates on each slot’s progress, but i admittedly didn't do a good job keeping them updated (and constantly updating two things in different places just. kinda sucks.), so i’ve been diving into trello to unify that update section in one place and keep things nice and organized and transparent : ) it would be super useful for keeping track of the waitlist too, if that becomes a thing, or for updates on commission status and such!

so far i’m only testing things out, so it’s looking like this right now (sorry for the tiny image!):

(the board is lying btw, commissions are very much closed haha) (also if it’s basically unreadable, here’s the upload on sta.sh)

with all those little lists, the “available slots” and “sketch” and “lineart” and whatnot, i would be moving the card along the process : D and adding the appropriate labels, of course

this way i can have those halfsteps labelled too (working on/halfway through/finishing), since there’s only so many colors i can use without making it confusing (and tbh i’m already not too thrilled about color labels as it is, but it beats typing each individual status, and i’d imagine it’s more readable for folks consulting the list as well)

i really like how this looks so far in terms of organization but i’m unsure if the horizontal scrolling is anything but annoying, specially to folks on mobile (with the way i divide my screen on desktop, it certainly isn’t ideal either), so if you have any experience with that, feel free to let me know your thoughts!! there are a thousand different ways to organize this, and this is all a work in progress too c:

so! anything specific you folks would like to see on trello? i know this is a fairly common tool for commission queues and info and such but i’m super new to this platform, so please feel free to send suggestions! ♥

anyway yeah! that’s it! ;0; !

i’m sorry for the super long post, i’ve just been thinking about a lotta stuff haha i feel like i don’t interact a whole lot as it is, and since commissions are very much a team effort, i do want to get input from you folks on it c: it’s good to get a fresh perspective as well!

thank you so much for reading this far !! let me know your thoughts !!! :D ♥

[twstarchives]

Epel Felmier・Voice Lines

Additional Voice Lines

Dress-Up Groom event card

Scary Dress event card

School Uniform - R

Unlock Card “What’s wrong? ...Is there something on my face?”

Groovy “I’ll peel an apple for you too. I can promise you they taste delicious.”

Home Setting “I wonder what kind of magic we’re going to learn today.”

Home Transitions “I only wear this frilly blouse because the dorm leader told me to. It’s not because I like it... or anything.”

“I like magic... I think. I mean, the strength of your magic doesn’t have anything to do with your stature, so...”

“It’s really nippy where I live, so—oh, huh? You don’t know what nippy means? It means ‘very cold’... kind of.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “You’re staring at me really hard; do you need something... maybe?”

Home Taps “If I got taller, I’d look like an even more powerful mage... I think.”

“Meemaw—ah, I mean, my grandmother sent a bunch of apples from home. Do you want one too... maybe?”

“Apples can grow in harsh winter conditions. They’re a very strong, durable fruit. Did you know that?”

“Living in a dorm isn’t really that inconvenient... I think. There were always a lot of people in my house back home anyway.”

“Look here, the hell were you——....Ahh, I mean, are you teasing me like I’m weak...?”

PE Uniform - R

Unlock Card “I like these clothes. And I’m not just saying that ‘cause I have to or anything...”

Groovy “Are you tired? Hehe, being a mage is a real test of strength.”

Home Setting “Clothes that are easy to move in are nice, huh?”

Home Transitions “I decided when I first came to this school to try out some sports. 'Cause I wasn’t really able to do them back home...”

“The magical shift club leader Leona told me that winning depends on strategy, not your physique.”

“I’m good at flying... I think. A lot of the sweet, delicious apples grow in high places, right where the sun hits, so I have to ride a broom when I pick them.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “A lot of people say I don’t look like I’d be good at sports, but I kind of like them...”

Home Taps “I don’t really have any muscles, even though I work out. I wish I had muscles like Coach Vargas...”

“Apples are good to eat after exercising. I heard the acids in them help you cool off.”

“I’m not really good at dancing... I think. I’ve only danced a little at the festivals in my village...”

“My muscles are sore after working out with the dorm leader... He told me I wasn’t flexible and tried to stretch me out like pie dough.”

“Y’know, I’m real tired of you jabbin’ at me like tha—ah! Um, could you maybe not poke me like that?”

Lab Coat - SR

Unlock Card “We have a lab...? If I mess it up, the dorm leader’ll get mad at me... probably.”

Groovy “I want to be a master at making potions someday too.”

Home Setting “I want to learn about potions that grow plants...”

Home Transitions “The work at Night Raven College is hard... kind of. I can never remember those long plant names...”

“Whenever Professor Crewel teaches, you can tell he knows a lot about color-changing potions and flowers that can dye things really pretty colors.”

“The library at this school is full of books from all around the world. The dorm leader told me I need to read one every week.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “There’s a lot of fruits I’ve never seen before in the Botanical Garden; it’s fun looking at them all... kind of.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “It’s frustrating when I can’t solve a hard problem... kind of. I was going to go try researching in the library. Want to come too?”

Home Taps “There’s a lot of people in Pomefiore who are good at magic potions. But I’m not really there yet... I think.”

“One bite of the poisoned apple and you fall into an eternal slumber... I need to be careful when making strong potions.”

“If I made a potion that could strengthen weak apple trees, it’d make Pawpaw really happy.”

“Rook’s an amazing person; he’s so good at sports and his studies too... I think. It’s just, he’s really, really weird...”

“Are you blind or somethin’? I’m busy brewing here so leave me alone for now—...ah! I mean, it’s dangerous if you’re not careful, so please don’t touch, okay?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Have you grown any plants before? ...Oh, I see. Want me to split seedlings that are easy to grow for you?”

Ceremony Robes - SR

Unlock Card “Don’t worry about me. ...He does this for the both of us.”

Groovy “I’m going to surpass the dorm leaders in no time. I swear it...!” 

Home Setting “It feels like my robes are dragging on the floor... kind of.”

Home Transitions “They say the hoods of these robes are supposed to give off the impression of the Beautiful Queen when she turned into an old woman... Did you know that?”

“The Queen was even willing to make herself ugly in order to be the fairest in the land... She’s real marvy.”

“The Mirror of Darkness is supposed to pick your dorm based on the qualities of your soul, but does my soul really match Pomefiore...?”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Students with all kinds of natural power go to this school... I want to get stronger here too!”

Home Transition (Groovy) “When I sent my grandma pictures of me from the entrance ceremony, she said ‘You look real smart ‘n spruce’! Meemaw’s just exaggerating...”

Home Taps “I feel like there’s a whole lotta ballsy guys at this school. It’s a little different from what I’d pictured before coming here.”

“When the black carriage came to pick me up, all my relatives and the villagers came to wish me off... Hehe.”

“Neither of my parents can use magic, but Big Maw and Meemaw⁠—ah, I mean, my great-grandma and my grandma are both witches.”

“I didn’t grow up around a lot of mages, so life at this school feels very new... kind of.”

“Ah? The hell do you want? Stop actin’ like we’re so close.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “This makeup Vil put on me won’t smudge at all... How is it now? Did it come off?”

Dorm Uniform - SSR

Unlock Card “Want a bite of an apple so sweet you’ll think you’re dreaming?”

“I’m just obeying what the dorm leader asks of me. ...For now.”

Groovy “I may be in Pomefiore, but... I’m still me!”

Home Setting “Welcome to Pomefiore! ...Hah.”

Home Transitions “I’ve got a lot of weird seniors in Pomefiore. It still feels kind of hard to fit in here...”

“I’ve never really cared that much about how I dress, but I love apples that are shaped nicely... I think.”

“I always thought Pomefiore was all about enforcing beautiful looks, but not everyone’s like that. The dorm leader is just a special case.”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “Wearing the Pomefiore dorm uniforms isn’t just about being beautiful. The dorm leader told me ‘You must get strong,’ too.”

Home Transition (Groovy) “I wish people would tell me I’m cool instead of saying things like ‘pretty’ or ‘cute.’”

Home Taps “The deep indigo used for our dorm uniforms is said to be the same color as the Beautiful Queen’s dress.”

“I once got lost in the dorm and ended up at this creepy basement. I wonder what that room is used for...”

“Did you see the huge apple trees in our dorm’s courtyard? Back home, we’ve got apple trees too. ...But I’m not homesick or anything.”

“Keep this a secret from the dorm leader, but... I actually wanted to get into Savanaclaw. They seem kinda bad and tough. I like it.”

“Quit pokin’ at me so casually! ...I’m kidding. I just don’t really like being touched, I think.”

Home Tap (Groovy) “Ramshackle must be so nice. I’d love to be alone and free.”

Duo Magic Epel: “Let’s go, Rook!” Rook: “How daring you are, Monsieur Cherry Apple.”

Birthday Celebration Outfit - SSR

This card was only obtainable during Epel’s birthday event (May 5 - May 12, 2021).

Unlock Card “I can’t believe you guys are throwing such a huge celebration for me... Thank you, everyone!”

“I want this year to be fruitful, like the way fresh apples grow every year.”

Groovy “I hope that next year I can have a blast with you and everyone else again!”

Home Setting “How do I look? Cool, right? ...Huh?! I’m ‘cute’?”

Home Transitions “Deuce gave me a cap with really cool patches on it. I’m gonna wear it next time I go see him.”

“Ruggie told me ‘I’m expecting a little something back from ya!’ when he handed me a present... I have no idea what I’d get for a senior.”

“Everyone looked so shocked when I blew out my birthday candles in one breath... Do I really seem that weak?”

Home Transition (Login Greeting) “It’s my birthday party today, so maybe I can act like myself a little bit, and have fun...”

Home Transition (Groovy) “I’ve still gotta do homework after this... Ah! Maybe it’d fun if I worked with you. It’d be like we’re keeping the party going!”

Home Taps “Jack gave me a cactus. I hear it’s hard to get them to bloom flowers, but I’ll try my best to grow one!”

“I used to mark my height on a pillar to see how tall I’d gotten. But I stopped because I wasn’t really growing...”

“Huh?! There’s cream near my mouth? That could’ve been bad... Vil was about t’get real hacked off at me!”

“It makes me happy to get presents, but I don’t really have a use for makeup and fluttery clothes and stuff like that...”

“You want to see me carve an apple? Then I’ll give a go at carving a portrait. Will you be my model?”

Home Tap (Groovy) “I like how the party really picks up when you and Grim are here. I don’t do so great when the mood’s all stiff.”

Duo Magic Epel: “Vil! There’s something a bit different about me today.” Vil: “Happy birthday, Epel. Let’s see it.”

Tutorial “Let’s go! I’ll leave you behind if you don’t keep up.”

Lv Up “Ehehe, I made some progress... I think.”

“If I do my best, someday I’ll definitely make it...!”

“Let’s try our hardest from now on. Okay?”

Max Lv Up “I feel a strong power rising in me, like an ice-cold poison. It feels like I could put anyone to sleep... maybe?”

Episode Lv Up “Why’re you even botherin’ with me? If it’s ‘cause you think I’m strong ‘n reliable, then... that’d make me happy.”

Magic Lv Up “With this power, I’ll even take on the dorm leader!”

Limit Break “I’m getting stronger. Do you believe in me too...? Maybe?”

Groovy “I wish I could grow slowly and steadily, like an apple.”

Select Lesson “What subject are you going to take? ...I like flying, I think.”

“Do you want to take a class with me? It doesn’t really matter to me, though... hehe.”

“Seriously, how long are you just gonna stand there? Pick already.”

Lesson Start “Mm, hello everyone.”

Lesson End “I’m drained from all that studying!”

Battle Start “You’ve got some nerve biting at me...!”

Battle Win “Guess I’m not as soft as I look! Maybe.”

Other

Profile Quote “Apples are awkward and hard to handle... just like...”

January 2020 Trailer “Are you by chance waiting for your prince on a white horse to come?”

Countdown Poster “Would you like a bite of this red apple?”

Login Bonus “It’s important to keep up at something everyday. Apples won’t ripen either if you don’t take care of them everyday... you know?”

Player Birthday Wish “It’s your birthday, ain’t it! I made some jam outta the apples my family sent me... Here! Ah... Um... What’s wrong? You’re making a funny face... Did I say something weird... maybe?”

Epel sometimes slips into speaking in Tsugaru dialect, which is so different than standard Japanese that sometimes it’s impossible to understand unless you’re familiar with it. I’d describe it as a “heavy country dialect.” There’s no perfect way to translate it, and I don’t really have a good grasp on different English dialects anyway, but I tried 🙆‍♀️ If anything was worded strangely, it was probably intentional!

[untitledtheunknown]

Not saying you have no reason to feel "bleh", sometimes the brain just insists, but there is so much character in the little snippets and commentary and photos you do. Even if they are similar to other people's (which is really hard not to do), they are so unique to themselves it's absolutely worth it.

Hopefully you're feeling better soon, and can find joy in creating and talking about your boys again ❤

Its late so I'm gonna kinda reply to this with what has been going on on my end and where this funk is coming from. Putting it under a read more to spare everyone, but first and foremost I do appreciate all of you beyond belief for reaching out and having such kind words to say. I know its just a me thing but sometimes it all does just get to me. With that being said, feel free to ignore the whole next bit.

I 100% understand and accept its never going to be completely possible to make completely original characters, especially given the restricted format we have for CP2077. I wish we had more power to craft our characters, more like Fallout 4's character creator (which despite the game's flaws I still go back to just to make characters lol). The problem is I see Valor in game and these screenshots of him and while I do like how he looks... its not him. Not completely. His scars are wrong, he doesn't have his tattoos, hair isn't right, he's missing the ports on his body, and overall things just aren't 100% with him. But despite all that, 3rd time around I think he looks pretty good. Again though am limited to what the game allows so a part of me does get a bit offed when I see other ppls Vs that look a bit too similar. I know its just me, I don't take it to heart, its just upsetting reminder I can't make him look how he's supposed to. Same with Umbra, he looks nothing like how he looks in our TTRPG and it really hurts because I spent a long time making him with our GM and I can't show that. Its not possible in game and my art doesn't do him any justice. So it gets frustrating because I look at some of these guys and they're not my characters, just similar figures to them, but not them.

Which is really hard especially when it comes to Val because long ago he was a self insert that I used to project how I wanted to look. I Have never done well with identifying as trans, I don't like to glamorize it or be recognized for it. I'm saving up for chest surgery but I'm fucking terrified of having the scars. I just don't want to be associated and recognized with it after my transition just because it's been really rough to go through in general. I haven't enjoyed this journey at all really, and really wish I didn't have to go through it. Valor in the RPG was my way of coping and going through stuff. Instead of gender though it was his association with cyberware and having parts of his body and "humanity" removed, replaced with machine and wires. I don't project onto him as much as I once did but he still will and forever hold pieces of that history because that's how I made him.

With all that, all I really do have is my words. Part of the problem with that is there's literally years worth of lore. I've been playing the same campaign with the same group of friends since my freshman year of college. So like 6/7 years now? There's a lot. The issue is these are people I'm really good friends with. This game has become a kind of safe zone for us. We're all a bunch of artist that mainly specialized in horror content. We were part of a movie club that mainly watched horror movies. We're the bitches that watched the Saw series during our free hour in the school library, like we are chill. That also just kinda means there's a lot of dark and twisted subject matter that ends up in our games. Characters having experienced some fucked up shit, witnessed some fucked up shit, and have done some fucked up shit. Feel kinda weird posting or sharing some of the more dark things in detail. So end up watering them down and they don't always feel right.

Top of all that, I just don't have the time to do things I wanna do. I feel so goddamn pressured at home and like I should be doing more. I honestly don't know how half these people have the time to learn and do the amount of mods and edits they do. I'm not gonna lie, I'm envious of it. I get 8-10 hours of being yelled at by customers, and then I may or may not have an hour long drive to take my brother to work or pick him up some days, and then whatever my parents have going on. I want to get back into art, I want to learn 3D modeling, I want to learn how to properly mod but I'm usually so stressed out or just exhausted nothing sticks so I don't even bother really. It sucks, because I want to learn, I want to do things, but I can't. I feel like because I have so little private and personal time now if I can't get things quick enough its not worth the effort. Its frustrating but again that's all on me.

And in other news, lotta people around me are dying or have had family die do to COVID and other things. Earlier this year a close friend of mine lost her dad to COVID and she's still struggling with that. A family friend of ours died earlier this week at the age of 35 from unknown causes. I have another friend who is in the psych ward because he is once again dealing with mental stuff and wellness check did not turn up well. Round it all off, my grandpa has basically given up on his life as well, flat out saying there's nothing worth living for anymore. Given his health issues I know its only a matter of time until I'm saying my final goodbye to him as well. So its rough, and fucking sucks. Not much I can do about it, but it makes me feel fucking worse with my own depression and suicidal thoughts. I know I'd never act on the thoughts, but seeing how death effects those around me makes me feel fucking worse for even thinking about it.

The part that sucks the most about it all, and even something I've expressed to my therapist is I'm completely self aware that its all in my head. I know I can't control these situations, and that skills take time to be acquired and grow. I am so grateful for all friends and support I do have, here, on disco, irl, I see the kind words and love and it really means a lot. I feel like a horrible friend because I don't know what to do really. I know its in my head, and I know what I can and can't control. I know what I need to do, yet I don't feel any better. I feel worse, I feel like I'm distant, and dismissive. I feel like what content I am putting out is stale and boring. I just feel lost and I'm not sure what piece I'm missing to really get things going again. I love my characters, I love making stuff with them. I love the story arch I have for Val and Ker and I want to share all of that with you all. I just feel really weird.

[inventors-fair]

Club Decks: What We Play

Fifteen decks, fifteen archetypes, fifteen strategies. For my students, not everyone can make a good deck, and/or they don’t necessarily have the resources to make what they’d like. Commander and stuff is the most difficult, but they enjoy Oathbreaker with the inexpensive and more or less accessible planeswalkers, and they don’t usually worry about Standard, Modern, or Pioneer. 

Club decks have a number of cards of different rarities that I use to model them off of my first starter decks, back in Alara. There’s a fair amount of repeats and a good chunk of power, and they’re easy enough to model so that students can make their own.

Depending on the year (2020-21 being pretty disruptive), there are different criteria for “leveling up,” which means beating a number of students and then beating me to get a booster pack and a level in my ledger. There’s no limit, except you can’t level up more than once a week. Hey, I make enough to make kids happy, but not enough to give them a zillion packs.

Below the cut are my club decks, some notable cards, and why I made them the way that I did. Enjoy this little slice of Magic! If you’re looking to start similar programs or you’d like details as to how things are run, let me know and I can provide extended decklists and explanations.

1. White Equipment Voltron

Notable cards include:

Healer’s Hawk

Taj-Nar Swordsmith

Strata Scythe

Little things turn into big things. With a little bit of destruction and a whole lotta keywords, this deck is all about building up to a single aggressive Voltron creature that wrecks shop. It’s good about teaching different card types and keyword interactions, and hey, it feels good to swing with an 11/11 creature that started off as a 1/1, right?

2. Blue Tempo Control

Notable cards include:

Pestermite

Everdream

Tidespout Tyrant

This is the deck for advanced players. The big blue comes out with a lot of disruption, and this is the deck that often gets described as either “unfun” or “my favorite deck.” Bounce it, counter it, bounce my land to cycle, return your threat, disrupt, and so on and so forth. Not every deck has a difficulty curve like this, but it’s satisfying to say the least.

3. Black Sacrifice Everything

Notable cards include:

Butcher Ghoul

Whisper, Blood Liturgist

Priest of Forgotten Gods

“Synergistic” is an understatement. The number of death triggers and sacrifice triggers can easily win someone a game if they know how to interact properly. Forcing decisions upon your opponent and exploiting some awesome stuff from your side of the field makes this deck easy to play if you want to have things die and VERY easy if you know how to manipulate the board.

4. Red Discard into Madness

Notable cards include:

Spinehorn Minotaur

Dragon Mage

Glint-Horn Buccaneer

I’ll admit, this deck is a bit of a pet project and one of my favorites. Ditching cards to draw cards feels great to me! I love madness, I love looting, and I love throwing a bunch of stuff away to make big things before getting it all back later. As much tuning as it needs, this deck is another advanced joy for people that love to make niche ideas work to the best of their ability.

5. Green Lands & Boys

Notable cards include:

Timbermaw Larva

Howl of the Night Pack

Kalonian Twingrove

Sometimes you just want an easy ramp deck. The small end of this gets lands and has some landfall, and the big end just wrecks shop with the big and powerful creatures that we all know and love from green. It’s easy to play and it’s easy to win with and sometimes, stomping is all you need to do. A great card for the Tim-Tams of the world.

6. UW Fliers Beatdown

Notable cards include:

Squadron Hawk

Watcher of the Spheres

Windreader Sphinx

I recently got my butt handed to me with this deck, and it’s not to be trifled with. Each deck has its own kind of evasion and whatnot, but this deck has got the early-game down and the late-game? Unstoppable. It’s designed to massacre you in the air and that’s what it does. Pumps, beats, and more. One of the first decks the kids loved.

7. UB Surveil Control

Notable cards include:

Notion Rain

Price of Fame

Thief of Sanity

“Really?” Yeah, well, here’s the thing: I built this deck when I didn’t have a whole lot of spare cards sorted, and that’s why I did it. As a block mechanic, though, surveil really is fun, and as a control player, the deck is pretty darn sweet. It’s beefy, powerful, and great flavor for the city. Fun fact: the Thief of Sanity I had is actually a misprint! It’s missing the rare sticker.

8. RB Goblins Snarl Rage Win

Notable cards include:

Goblin Instigator

Fodder Launch

Weirding Shaman

And this is another deck that the kids absolutely love. Fast fun, and furious, Goblins is a great tribal introduction that people go to when they want to show how easy and cheeky it can be. Burn ‘em out, make ‘em attack, turn ‘em sideways. This isn’t necessarily an easy deck, but if all you know is attacking, then you’re golden. Or, you can kill someone only through noncombat damage!

9. RG Monsters of the Jungle

Notable cards include:

Ruination Wurm

Footfall Crater

Mina and Denn, Wildborn

This is, surprisingly, the deck with what I feel is the lowest barrier to entry. You give big things trample. Now, there IS a fair bit of complexity in the number of combat tricks, with some buffs and some bloodrush cards along with it, but everyone knows that big things are big. The difference is in the variety of strategies available to you with access to red mana. 

10. GW Token Swarm

Notable cards include:

Raise the Alarm

Selesnya Guildmage

Growing Ranks

If you can be fast with this deck, then you can run someone over faster than they could ever react. If you can be slow with this deck, you can build up enough life and army power that you literally can’t be beat. There’s a lot to love about this deck and it’s not as easy as it might seem. Tokens are popular with a subset of MTG players, and I’m glad that they have lots of support.

11. BW Ghosts of your Past

Notable cards include:

Pillory of the Sleepless

Vizkopa Guildmage

Ethereal Absolution

Basically, this is in the same vein as the surveil deck, but like the surveil deck, this has been modified so you get the best out of the deck. There’s a little nasty sacrifice, some draining, lots of good stuff. This is a deck for players who want to be mean, but with the option to beat down as well. After all, the best games are one you play in good spirits!

12. GB Elves Reclamation

Notable cards include:

Eyeblight’s Ending

Shaman of the Pack

Immaculate Magistrate

Everyone loves elves. Except for the people that hate elves. You get them out, go wide, or go narrow. Either way, you’re beating in face. This deck can be impossibly fast and I love it, but without breaching the barrier of being overpowered. Heck, I’ve won and lost with all of these decks, but elves put up a struggle, and I love that for them.

13. UG Defenders and Butts

Notable cards include:

Axebane Guardian

Assault Formation

Feed the Pack

I’ve been 100% blown out by this deck before by a student who I underestimated. That’s fantastic. This is the kind of deck that students don’t understand until they see it being played, and that’s honestly great. It’s fantastic to watch them learn and I love watching them pull out all the stops to get the biggest butts possible. Can’t beat seventeen angry wolves!

14. UR Spellslinging Recursion

Notable cards include:

Thermo-Alchemist

Thoughtflare

Call the Skybreaker

Flashback, Jump-Start, and Retrace: people love to cast spells. There’s so much fun stuff that can happen in a stormlike brew, and though it’s definitely not storm, it encourages playing spells, and that’s what makes it fun. It appeals to burn and control players alike and makes them feels skillful to the max. It’s Izzet in everything but perfect flavor.

15. RW Combat Control

Notable cards include:

Thatcher Revolt

Intimidation Bolt

Citadel Siege

I actually let my kids down with this deck before. It was an underpowers Firesong and Sunspeaker deck, and it just wasn’t working. What else can you do? Blow things up and make ‘em big. This deck is a powerhouse of unimaginable proportions and I love playing with it. Smart combat makes for some tricky strategy, and it’s humbling for the reckless opponnent.

That’s all for now! Ask me about questions and I’ll tell you no lies. And hey, if you know any kids, play around with ‘em and see how they engage with MTG. What do they lean to? How can you use that to teach them? It’s an amazing game and I’m glad to be sharing it with you, too.

—Abelzumi

[chickenfreeblog]

hi chicken, I really like and admire your androgynous (is that the best word? is there a different one you prefer) vibe and was wondering if you had any advice on how to like embody that and how to get other people to see you that way too instead of like “x dressing like y” you know? thanks!!

hi! fair enough I know it’s late and it’s probably not like a one liner (though you’re very good at those), I guess both online and irl? obviously online like here it’s so much easier but I know you also mentioned like even from a young age people looking at you and going ??okay?? I also wanted to clarify I meant math x&y not like gendery x&y

thanks chicken!!

---

hey pal!! this is a really interesting question, and i’ll try to answer it in some way that’s kinda useful? i think a lot of it is just kinda something you have to feel out, but we’re gonna take a stab at it! more (...a lot more) under the cut:

irl: a mess. a clown show. this is mostly luck mixed with havoc? i think i lucked out body-wise and also with the fact that my parents just did not really bother with enforcing any gender stuff and i just... ended up with real ambiguous taste in everything. my friends also gave me a real ambiguous nickname, which i think helps a lot? 

jhkgfsh i really feel like i don’t have good advice on this one because my answer is just “well why do you have that cursed amulet (a gender) in the first place” which probably isn’t that useful!! um um um..... maybe if you have someone you feel comfortable with, try talking it out with them to see like, how they perceive you & where you could change course?

i don’t think the clothes thing is 100% and i know you said you don’t want to feel like you’re dressing up as something else, which i totally get. at the same time, i think every outfit feels like dress up until you’ve gotten comfortable with it, and then it’s just your clothes? i think people can pick up on how confident you are, so maybe that’s still something that’s worth playing with? also people really have a... range of sensitivity to gender stuff. i’ve met some people who will just assign one and stick with it no matter what you fuckin do, and some people who will go into a tailspin over like, a little bit of nail polish or something. if you get weird reactions to any of it, it doesn’t necessarily reflect anything you’re actually doing? a lotta times it’s people just having their own wack ass journey & projecting on whoever walks past, so don’t take individual reactions too seriously?

on that front too – i think androgyny is just fuckin tough. i feel like there’s this idea that like, if you just have your presentation worked out a certain way it’s gonna work 99% of the time and you’re gonna live like an instagram model. i think in reality though like...... a ton of people out in the world just feel more comfortable if they can categorize someone in a binary way? they might pick up on little cues & it might just feel impossible to do with your body or your name or what’s in your closet, and that’s really not on you, so maybe thinking of what parts of that presentation will you happy rather than what people will vibe with is more helpful? even as someone who historically can slip through, i’ve definitely had the experience of like going out thinking that my carefully crafted Magic Girl Gender is absolutely perfect and then just talking to some rando who’s like I’m Gonna Fuck Up This Little Queer’s Whole Deal By Calling Them Sir hjkgdfshjk. it just.... is a thing that happens and i’m not sure that there’s a magic stage where it really stops. i don’t say that to scare you off at all, but just legit i wish i had some fucking warning sometimes. 

also get a weird name that’s just like a noun or a random syllable. that’s my other tip. once your name is “grog (the caveperson)” you’ll definitely raise a lot of gender questions.

online: i feel like online is largely about setting boundaries, which is fun? people only have the information you give them, so you can kinda force them into confusion if that’s what brings you joy. 

i reeeeeally hate the fact that people will see selfies or even just vague genderedish info about someone who’s afab or amab and be like “cool!!! got my gender answer then!!” but.... i will say that i think people do seem to enjoy categorizing that way, and there is definitely a tendency to jump to conclusions? it kind of forces people to decide between saying really limited info vs. being perceived as their gender, which absolutely fucking sucks, but i do think that just limiting what you say or post a little bit can go a long way? (i really hate giving this advice tbh because it suuucks and puts it on the person who’s having the gender vs the people making assumptions. but also you gotta live with their assumptions and i think it’s okay to decide to protect yourself a little if that feels right).

other than boundaries... idk? i think if you have experiences from like, both sides of the gender coin, i actually find it really nice to be able to just talk about whatever without censoring and giving caveats about how it’s Weird that i’ve experienced something?

i think w the boundaries you’ll probably experience pushback and people making assumptions and definitely it can feel weird to be the one person who’s withholding info in your group of friends, but i’ve also made really good friends who get it & have been really really really kind and thoughtful, so! i think it’s worth trying!!

in conclusion:

[asahinagamine]

Gemsphere / Rough Diamond - 3

Season: Autumn

Writer: Yuumasu

Background: TV Station Set Backstage

Mitsuru: ♪～♪～♪

Tetora: Looks like Tenma-kun’s in a good mood~

Mitsuru: It’s all thanks to the bread Anzu-nee-chan gave me! Bread always puts me in such a good mood ☆

Here-here! Teto-chan should eat some too! 

Tetora: I’m good. I’ve already eaten a ton, so go ahead and help yourself to the rest.

This is the first time I’ve seen so much bread at once. It’s like a month’s worth of bread.

Mitsuru: Really? For me, this is less than a week’s worth.

Shinobu: Mitsuru-kun probably prefers bread for breakfast, lunch, and dinner! Though I suppose bread can be part of all three of them too.

Mitsuru: Fufun. I’ll always have room for bread ♪

Nazuna: Bread’s pretty great, isn’t it? It’s easy to carry around with ya.

Watching Mitsuru-chin eat made me pretty hungry too. I might stop by a convenience store to buy ice cream.

Tetora: Can I come with you? Apparently they’re selling limited-time kalbi rice balls.

Shinobu: I shall follow you too! Convenience stores are always changing up their products so it’s always a lotta fun to visit one.

Mitsuru: Ooh, I’ll come too! I’m kinda thirsty so I wanna buy myself a drink~

Tetora: Eh? We still got a lot of stuff here, are you really planning to buy more?

Mitsuru: Duh! And you can never have enough bread~!

...Eh? I think someone was knocking just now.

Nazuna: Ah—that must be Anzu.

Heeeeeey~ Anzuuu~ Everyone’s already finished changing, so you can come in now. 

Good work, Anzu. How’s the thing we talked about going? ...Oh, you’ve contacted the client already?

I can keep the box for a week as long as I don’t break it… Thank god.

Shinobu: The box… break it… Are you perhaps talking about the secret box earlier? 

Nazuna: Yup. I wanted to see what was inside it so I asked permission to investigate. 

I gotta give this to my professor as soon as possible. I hope I can meet them tomorrow. 

Tetora: Umyu… I’m also curious about what’s inside, but why would you go to such lengths just for that?

The staff couldn’t open it, either. It’s definitely gonna give you a hard time, y’know. 

Nazuna: Yeah, I know but… I just can’t help myself. 

When we introduced each treasure, we read the letters that came with them aloud, right?

I was the one who read out the letter about the secret box, and it's been lingering in my mind since then. They said they inherited this box from their grandmother. 

“Inherited”, implying that their grandmother has most likely passed away. She probably left this behind as a momento. 

Even if it’s for a TV program segment, it was still appraised by an expert. If we don’t find out what’s inside now, it may remain unknown forever... 

Whenever I think about it, I can’t stand the idea of giving up. I wanted to do something for them, so I asked Anzu if she could negotiate.

...Hm? You were also interested in what’s inside, so you were glad that I asked?

Shinobu: Nito-dono, I also feel the same way. I’d like to help even if my contribution won’t be much.

Mitsuru: Me too! If we all work together, I’m sure we can open this!

Tetora: How about we all work together to force this thing open?

If we do that, I’m confident it’ll open. Like chopping roof tiles―

Nazuna: No way, we can’t do that! I only got to borrow it on the condition that I wouldn’t break it.

Tetora: Ahaha, I’m kiddin’. This box looks pretty sturdy, so I’m not actually planning on it.

Nazuna: All right then, let’s get going. Anzu, I’m going to the convenience store with everyone, wanna come?

Tetora: ...Eh? You still have work to do? You sure are hard-working, huh… 

Mitsuru: I got this from you, but here’s some bread! 

Eat this and feel better! Woo~ Woo~ Anzu-nee-chan ♪

A few days later, after the day of the shooting

Background: Nazuna’s University

Nazuna: Heeeyyy, Anzu! Over here!!

Sorry for making you wait. One of the guys from my class got a hold of me.

...You feel bad for asking me to come and meet you all of a sudden? Don’t worry about that. You came here to give me stuff I need for work, right?

Thank you for taking the time to come all the way here. I’ll read through this before our meeting. 

...Did I find out anything about the secret box?

Nope, not at all. My professor was quite shocked since it was his first time encountering such a mechanism. They tried whatever they could but it still wouldn’t open... 

My professor suggested that I should take it for a CT scan(1) and requested it to a reliable laboratory, but I declined their offer since it’d take a month to finish. 

I’m looking through books from the library about crafts at the moment. I’ve borrowed a buncha books from our university’s library, so I might be able to find something...

Nazuna: I’ve only got a few days left until I have to return this secret box, so I’m gonna try to do everything I can to open it. The other three are also working hard to open it.

Since I’m the oldest, I can’t go throwing in the towel just yet!

...I’m reliable? Haha, of course I am. I’m ‘Nii~chan’ after all ♪

You’ve grown into a brilliant producer, but you’re still probably going to run into trouble from time to time.

And whenever that happens, you can always rely on your Nii~chan. I’ll always be there to help you… 

A computerized tomography scan (CT or CAT scan) uses computers and rotating X-ray machines to create cross-sectional images of the body.

Proofread by: nazunyan + ciel

[axemetaphor]

Hey, I'm that guy from ao3. I was wondering, do you have a specific place you get inspo for monsters in Auckland? I'm making a DnD campain in the J&D world, aaand I kinda need help haha. Yours are like perfect <3 (Also, if you wanna join us, you can, we haven't even had our zero session and we're not playing actual DnD, I don't know how to play that, so it's ok if you don't know that, it's super easy and fun i swear, you can get a link to our discord, love you)

:0 oh shit hi !! a jdate DnD game sounds cool as fuck! im really bad at games like that tho so im gonna politely pass on that one but wish y'all the best of luck!!! 

as for making monsters my inspo is Kind Of Weird? i mean i look at a lotta horror art for sure (my favourite artist atm is Trevor Henderson aka slimyswampghost on most medias, u may know him as That Guy Who Made Sirenhead but he has a lot of other fantastic art as well!), but since i dont wanna feel like im rippin other people off i actually Dont often use that as inspo! aaaand heres where its gonna get a bit weird

aside from the times i pluck a creature from my nightmares (and boy, do i have a lotta material to work with there), i usually either look into folklore (bein mindful of closed cultures like, i believe most Native American monsters are off-limits for non-Natives to write; im white as hell so i try to stick to british/irish/more recent american shit) or... i look to this one game i played Obsessively when i was in elementary/middle school: Spore (which you can find on Steam i think or their hilariously hasn't-been-updated-in-a-WHILE website). I literally played it so much I can just kind of... imagine the whole creature-creator process. I think it’s a curse. I think Todd Howard cursed me for the crime of Having No Friends.

Now, if you dont wanna download a probably-poorly-aged EA game from 2007 (i dont even know if it’d run anymore if you Just Now bought it, i remember the security measures that thing had damn near broke the game before i could even play it, thanks EA) and play through the first two stages (theyre Long) to unlock the creature creator and all the Bits for it, you can either watch people play that shit on YouTube (Monster Factory is a favourite of mine, they did I Think a 3-video run of Spore) or, 

You can also do somethin that I once did as an assignment for Character Design class: go to a random animal generator, let it spit out 2-3 animals (or as many as you like, i guess, but i find 2-3 to be a Manageable number) and mash those motherfuckers together! Hell, you can even start to mix in stuff like objects/minerals/whatever the fuck too. Make something that’s a dog, hammerhead shark, and the concept of entropy. Go nuts! Here’s an example, some shit I made for that class (which mayyyyyy appear in Auckland...... perhaps. if i feel like it) :

They can range from “cute” to “nightmarish” as you please! Fun fact, that spider/shark/scorpion is meant to be the size of a house. I honestly come up with a lot of messed up shit by just asking myself "What's the worst thing I can think of right now?" and then I just Go For It with whatever my brain's thrown at me. I did that with Nightmare E.T. and the fucked-up ostriches. 'Scary' is often a sort of personal thing for people, like phobias and shit, you know? Lookin inward can be pretty helpful there. Not like you have to make something of your phobias, just maybe run with something that disturbs you a little. If you press yourself for why it bothers you sometimes you can find something deeper and maybe more universal in it. I'm not talking about unearthing trauma or anything tho that likely Wouldn't Be Healthy just like... if you think spiders are creepy, ask yourself Why: is it the eyes? the legs? the venom? the way they just kinda creep up on you, like, you dont notice em til you see them? etc.

As for the monsters in Auckland while most of them aren’t gonna be references (maybe a few more in future chapters...) I will admit the “morning wood monster” is a reference to the Pokémon Trevenant; the "most fucked-up dog [Dave had] ever seen" was a creature from The Moomins just described as horribly as possible--I can't find it on the wiki anymore??? it was from the 2d animated one, though; the Shitsucker is a regular ol’ Wraith (following a specific mythos where they aren’t just Random Ghosts but beings that feed off negative emotional energy, I can't re-find which one I'm sorry lmao); and the haunted ship thing at the beginning is a vague reference to the Buzzfeed Unsolved episode on that big ass boat. Isn't directly tied to it (obviously, 'cause Buzzfeed Unsolved never has much Actual Ghost Activity, let alone one Throwin Shit At Em jhgfds), more just inspired by it.

Maybe when the thing is done, I’ll sort them all into one of three categories--references to stuff/folklore, things i had nightmares about, and things i just kind of thought up. Make a post on here about it, idk

wow! this was fuckin long. i hope at least some of that is helpful!! also im adding this here cause i just remembered some people use Spore to sculpt like?? beautiful monsters and shit?? like i Know i watched a “speedrun” of someone creating a beautiful ass dragon in it. there’s probably a whole community of people out there making epic and/or fucked up shit and you could watch them build it or just scroll through thumbnails for inspo, but i do feel like Building Stuff Yourself is best, cause it just kind of Feels Nice to make something yourself and go “hey man, look how fucked up this is ! scary, right?” and get that Success Feeling when the other guy recoils and goes "yeah man what the fuck though"

[alovevigilante]

A toast, (NOT a roast) to Stevie Wonder. By: Kari Keillor

Ok, this man, is a walking miracle.

I probably don’t have to introduce him to you, if you can see this photo, but for those of you who are like me, and need glasses, or an assistant to read this post, this, is my favorite singer of songs of all time, one Mr. Steven E. Wonder.

Now, you may be saying to yourself, “hey, this nut ball is writing about a guy who doesn’t know her, and could probably give no hoots about her...” but oh, how you would be soooo wrong that the wrongness would sing in your face and peel your eyelashes back from the force of the wrongness. Steven, let’s call him Stevie for short, is a man who has shown so much love to the world and beyond, that he has superseded human limitations. In this piece, I will support my theory.

I now invite you to look at the above photo of Mr. Wonder. (Aptly named, for he is that...) In the photo he is surrounded by not one, not 2, but 7, yes, 7 synthesizers. Or, synclavios. I learned that term on the Cosby show, where Stevie, blind, was driving a car that ended up running into Theo and Denese Huxtable. He was nice enough, to pay for the damages, and their hospital bills no doubt, and invited the family to a sing along at his studio, where he recorded them, being them, and created a song about it. This man, is a very good judge of talent, as the Huxtable family, is full of it. Talent. Yes....

The mom, Clair, was not only a partner in a law firm, and a fabulous mom, but she was gorgeous, spoke fluent Spanish, had the body of a goddess after pushing out 5 kids, had a million friends and associates, and just also happened to be, a fantastic singer. She makes me sick, in a great way, because she inspired me as a kid, and showed me that I can do a multitude of things if I wanted to in this life. Did I do any of the things she did? Not many. But! I do know how to say, “Hola. Che tal.” Which is pretty ok. And she is fierce, and I am too. And Clair would not be who she is without the lovely and talented Phylicia Rashad. She’s amazing...

Yes. As you should. 💕

Now, back to Stevie.... in the above paragraph I casually mentioned that he was driving. Stevie is seeing impaired, and the man drives a car, because he’s that incredible. Here’s proof just recently, of Stevie driving a Tesla. (See below)

Note the steering wheel. Driving. Yes. Ok, so he had some help. Stevie is a creator of music, yes, but more importantly Stevie is a creator of love. And not just a little love. A whole lotta love, like Led Zeppelin, only no, because they are not him, they are them. Stevie emanates love out of every pour of his body, and in this case, that love has become so great, that it became his copilot, because needs one, because can’t make things happen on his own in this case. Stevie is like all of us in that regard. His copilot, in this case an autopilot, is there to guide him along his way.

And yes, there are other people in the car with him, helping and supporting. We need those people in life to co-create with, and to do more than we ever thought possible. They are, no doubt, also loving in their own right, and also brave, and a lil adventurous too. And no, the man sitting shot gun, is not who I’m referring to as stevie’s co-pilot. But I’m sure he’s cool as well, much like the lady in the back seat. Probably way cooler, than I would be, in that situation. 🙈🤷‍♀️😉 Stevie’s elation from driving was so intense, that it literally punched me in the face, and forced me to write about it. Now that’s some powerful stuff. 🥊 💕😆

On a more general note, Stevie is the creator of so much love it’ll make your head blow off and then, since he’s kind, he’ll help you figure out your feelings to get it back on straight again. But he doesn’t do it alone. He decided, when he was very young, to listen to that very wise co-pilot, who, incidentally, has been co-piloting with Stevie for years. It’s the connection that we all share, but Stevie happens to be better at listening and co-creating with it, then I am. I’m the type of driver, that yells when someone cuts me off, or tries to cross the street while I’m trying to blow the red light. But when my co-pilot kindly reminds me, that maybe that’s not the way to go, I yell at my co-pilot, and tell them all kinds of things I won’t repeat here. But Stevie, isn’t that way. He listens, he feels, and then he co-creates the best vibrational energy through his music and his voice, ever. And for that, we all should be appreciative, and a ton of us are.

Now, I have wondered, much like Stevie has but not, since he is the wonder that I wonder about, since he can do so many miraculous things, if he can also, bake. And yes, he can do that too. (See below)

I’m not sure who Hollie & Craig are, but they were the luckiest recipients ever of this message of happiness because they were born, and also, of this delicious looking cake, that I am envious of. Yes, I ended that sentence in a preposition. And I am, yes, I’m tired of apologizing for my shortcomings. I do it a lot. And Stevie, doesn’t. He takes his life, and rocks it. This man, is not only a musical genius, but he is an inspiration to me, for being me, fully and completely, and not being afraid to try new things, or apologizing for being myself. He’s taught mecthrough example to go beyond my mental limitations, and to become more than I ever thought I could be. I decided to embrace my co-pilot too. Not while I’m driving, because dangerous, but after I get out of the car. I decided, to take love’s advice, and try to create a more complete and fuller me, with education from people like Stevie, that shows us that loving others, and being loving to yourself, is the way to fully realize true happiness.

Laughing helps too. It’s a choice to experience the lighter side of life. Part of life is being open to receiving love from perfect strangers, not the short lived wackaschmoo sitcom from the 80s, although that had its charm, but from people all over the world who, like Stevie, are willing to share the love in the way that they do, and by appreciating and focusing on that, and not the other stuff. Because the other stuff, isn’t love.

People can be cruel sometimes, due to their harsh judgements and beliefs, and their subsequent choice to not allow themselves to fully recognize and experience the love that surrounds them in themselves and in others. I’ve experienced both sides of that coin, and both feel, quite frankly, lousy. Sight, is not the issue. Love, and the lack of it, is. But, I rib with love and admiration for Stevie. I honestly believe that Stevie can see more than most people, because of his choice to love, and to feel love, and to embody the love, and most importantly, to share the love that he creates with the world.

Focusing on feeling good, immersing yourself in positive thoughts and energy, encourages more of the same in return. You become the very thing you entertain internally. And Stevie, entertains Wonder. He is one of many lights that helps us see that we are all love, on the inside.

Be the miracle, that you are. And yes, just in case you were “Wonder”ing, I am the “master blaster, of appreciation. Happy belated birthday to yah, Stevie the WONDER-FUL . Thanks for your birthday gift to us... the love! 😉💕

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

so i’d really like to finish my guardian takedown lore analysis, but honestly the game isn’t really fun to play at the moment anymore (even with the health debuffs they added) so I think im going to be taking a break for now because I’m just not having fun anymore.

this game has a lotta mechanical problems i think need to be addressed so im gonna summarize it as bullet points below. I’ll play the new dlc when it drops, but idk if i’ll be on more than that (grinding, end-game stuff) until they make some serious changes. I’ve been playing (near) daily since launch, followed the patch/hotfix notes every single week, and my patience has finally, FINALLY run dry, especially with that really disappointing Phase 1 Patch and then the hotfix this week not adding anything else. What is the balancing team doing??? 😩

tl;dr: FIX THE VAULT HUNTERS!!!!

anyway. That’s all I needed to get outta my system. I might log on to this blog every now and again to post some random shit that pops into my head (probably with regards to my AU), but I’m not going to be actively playing and posting for the time being. Goodbye (for now), and here’s hoping the new DLC is good!! 

guardian takedown only problems:

there’s a lot of waiting around, and sometimes it’s not explicitly stated that you’re waiting for something, so you’ll be lost on what to do next (not sure if that’s a dialogue glitch or not)

the crystal charge insta-death is bull. just. what the hell. at least make it so you just have to start over. killing ur players for failing a “puzzle” that they then have to fight all the way back to is so infuriating.

dying because you fell off a platforming puzzle is also bull. 

i remember playing the first DMC on my playstation in middle school and having a conniption over the part in the observatory(? it’s been a hot minute since I played DMC 1) with the disappearing/invisible platforms. I h a t e jumping puzzles. why are they in a section of the game where death is semi-permanent and a detriment to your teammates. i tried the takedown 2x with friends and both times one friend didn’t make the first big jump to the temple and had to wait for our inevitable deaths. that’s so unfair to them.

there’s absolutely no reason for a boss to have 12 fuckin immunity phases. 4 per health bar with 3 health bars? Who the fuck designed this? *pumps shotgun* i just wanna talk. 

i appreciate a tasteful immunity phase every now and again (the ones in the Valkyrie fight are actually p reasonable), but christ. that is overkill. I don’t mind the main boss fight, since u can end those early through certain actions, but jesus. the mid-boss fight is annoying as hell. you spend more time running from the immunity phases and finding the damn boss than u do actually shooting it.

drop rates are crap, which I guess should be expected given what happened with the Maliwan Takedown and the handful of months it took for them to fix that, but also you think they’d have learned.

in the maliwan takedown there’s a sense of progression thru the facility after you kill each area’s batch of enemies, but in this one it’s... dampened by the crystal charging sequences. you kill all the enemies in an area, press a button, and now you have to kill 3x that number of enemies in the same area, expect you’re just standing there motionless. It’s not fun.

the crystal charging stuff is just not fun in general. standing in a square is not entertaining. it’s worse that it was clearly designed for 3+ players when a majority of people play/grind solo

i gotta admit the boss fights just aren’t as fun as the Maliwan Takedown fights overall. I felt like a real badass fighting Wotan for the first time, but the main boss for this Takedown is kind of a bitch. Wotan’s fight is chaos, there’s so much shit happening at once and you don’t really have time to process everything and I love it. This one is p meh...

This would be fine and I’d 100% not care that much if there weren’t all these OTHER problems

General Issues with the Game

There’s no endgame stuff to play outside of the takedowns. 

I assume they’re working on the first raid given some stuff I found in the Guardian Takedown files, but I really wish they’d keep the seasonal events/areas. They give us the option to disable/enable them while they’re ‘active’, just give us the ability to do it whenever we want.

when i hop on i either run through Athenas (my favorite map), or farm a boss or two. I have all the loot i really need from the maliwan takedown/elsewhere, and the guardian takedown just... isn’t fun atm, so i have nothing to do.

I’ve reset my playthru multiple times to play the main story at m10, but u can only play it (and the dlc) so many times

Mayhem levels and modifiers are a hot m e s s

a majority of the modifiers just aren’t fun to play with

they incorporated like 2-3 fun modifiers (from the community), then added a bunch that straight-up aren’t. I’m fine with the game being more difficult, but at least give us modifiers that make it more entertaining to play at a higher level instead of more annoying. I like the ones that have trade-offs or add new ‘enemies’, but I hate the ones that just straight up reduce your damage output.

a majority of the weapons with the mayhem 10 anointment (scaling) do not work on mayhem 10 (we’ll go more in-depth with this later)

Player Characters (Vault Hunters!!!) are also a hot mess and a lot of problems plaguing them haven’t been fixed SINCE LAUNCH

theyre literally the basis of the game and its balance. why havent you guys fixed them yet. stop adding new content until they’re fixed. no new skill trees until the base 3 trees work ON EVERY CHARACTER.

seriously. Why is amara p much limited to using Phasegrasp. Why does Iron Bear not matter to Moze except to proc anointments. MAKE ALL ACTION SKILLS EQUAL AND HAVE HEFT.

i wrote an essay here about it bc i feel that strongly about this

SERIOUSLY FIXING UR VAULT HUNTERS WILL MAKE BALANCING SO MUCH EASIER PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU THEY ARE THE BASE OF UR BALANCING WOES

ZANE IS STILL UNUSABLE WITHOUT THE SEEIN’ DEAD CLASS MOD!!!!!!!!!!!

MOZE IS SCREWED BC HER DAMAGE IS TOO RELIANT ON ASE ANOINTMENTS!!

AMARA DOESN’T HAVE A FUCKING MELEE BUILD AS THE ADVERTISED MELEE CHARACTER???

FL4K’S HEADCOUNT SKILL IS S T I L L BROKEN EVER SINCE THE RELEASE OF THE MALIWAN TAKEDOWN

ARE YOU GUYS LISTENING TO THE COMMUNITY *PLEASEEEEEEE*

BUFF AND FIX THE GODDAMN VAULT HUNTERS

Anointments were a mistake. Damage end-game is wayyyy too reliant on them

anoints should have a maximum of, like, a 20% damage bonus. the damage necessary to kill enemies *should be coming from the VHs themselves*. i don’t care if you have to revamp every single Vault Hunter’s skill trees and buff them all by 9000%. THEY DESERVE IT AT THIS POINT

at the moment in m10 there really isn’t much build diversity *even between Vault Hunters*. We’re all using the same 5 guns (OPQ System. Kaoson. idk. fuckin brainstormer? is that still a thing? jesus fuck) with the same 3 anointments (100% on ASE, cryo while SNTL, and 300% while 90%).

you want to diversify builds like you said during the gameplay reveal???? you want our choice in Vault Hunter to actually fuckin matter???? FIX THEM!!!! THEY SHOULD BE ABLE TO DEAL DAMAGE WITHOUT STUPID POWERFUL LEGENDARIES AND ANOINTMENTS!!!

Anoints also shouldn’t be common. At all. They should be, like, Pearl rarity. To let that happen, their damage needs to be tuned way the fuck down (again, 20ish % bonus MAX) and ALL ANOINTS NEED TO BE USEFUL IN SOME WAY

NOBODY IS GOING TO USE THE AIRBORNE OR SLIDING ANOINTMENTS JUST REMOVE THEM ALREADY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

obviously these changes can’t happen because they fucked up and buckled down with everything being anointed in m10, but still

imagine a world where the VHs actually did damage on their own without anointments and the damage buff from them was just an incentive to grind for the 100% perfect weapon and NOT A REQUIREMENT TO DEAL DAMAGE

>:(

A majority of gear is borderline worthless at M10

I’m fine with the difficulty of M10, i should let it be known. The enemy health isn’t really the problem IF ALL GUNS ACTED THE SAME AS THE OPQ SYSTEM

ffs.

you know, if you fixed ur vault hunters so they all did damage with just purple weapons (abt the same damage as legendaries w/o special effects) and removed the anointment requirement from late-game play, balancing your guns would be sooo much easier. you know. just saying.

right now only 10% (im being generous) of guns in the game are viable. 90% are worthless. We need AT LEAST 60-70% viable at M10. WHERE IS MY BUILD DIVERSITY. WHY ARE ALL LEGENDARIES NOW JUST “HEY THIS GUN IS STRONGER THAN THE LAST 4 WE RELEASED. HAVE FUN”

how to fix this problem? do as above: BUFF YOUR PLAYER CHARACTERS. MAKE ANOINTMENTS LESS STRONG.

then, at least the 10% already strong weapons would be stupid strong and OP as fuck, BUT AT LEAST WE COULD HAVE BUILD VARIETY!!! I don’t care if other people are dummy strong one-shotting everything in sight. I don’t! so long as they don’t play with me, I couldn’t care less!!! I want to be able to play with the unique, interesting legendaries. instead of the OPQ System. which, by the way, I dislike compared to the normal Q-System. let me use the frozen heart shield and the infiltrator mod. I don’t wanna be chained to the Seein’ Dead anymore :(

honestly at this point im starting to think removing slag was a mistake bc then at least we could use guns that aren’t solely damage-based guns. you know how fucked up you’ve got me that im thinking maybe slag wouldn’t be so bad this time around??? YOU GOT ME FUCKED UP B A D.

FIX THE GAME

IM TAKING A BREAK

MAYBE I’LL BE LESS UPSET WHEN I COME BACK FOR THE DLC BUT HOT. DIGGITY. SHIT.

[pants-jones]

Bioshock

 The title of this is simple because Bioshock is a game I almost forgot that I played, but as soon as I remembered it a truckload of Bioshock stuff came flowing into my mind, and I decided to write about it here so I can finally seal all the stuff about these games in my brain vault forever. The Bioshock series consists of three games, Bioshock, Bioshock 2, and Bioshock Infinite. Around when Infinite came out, I heard a lotta talk about how amazing it was, but I was like 10 at the time so I never got to play it until it was free on PsPlus a couple months ago, along with the other two. The first two Bioshock games are fairly simple, in story and in gameplay. But Bioshock Infinite took the entirely new level that thinking about it now, almost a year after playing it, still blows me away. I feel like Bioshock doesn’t get the recognition it deserves, the way that games like Portal and Half Life do. But when I say that Bioshock blew my expectations out of the water (that is a pun) is a huge understatement. 

So first, let’s start with the first Bioshock.  This game came out in 2007, and it really shows with very dated mechanics. The game feels old, and for me that made it way more difficult than it needed to be. Bioshock 2 on the other hand, came out in 2010, and while the story isn’t nearly as good, it’s definitely way more streamlined. I could definitely see myself going back and playing it again. Let’s start with the first game.

Bioshock

Bioshock starts with you on a plane, examining a letter, when the plane suddenly crashes in the middle of the ocean. You’re the only survivor, and the closest thing you can see besides the burning plane parts, is this strange lighthouse. 

This lighthouse is made of stone, and it’s tall and menacing but you enter since you have no other option.  The door closes behind you and the first thing you see is this.

As you go down the stairs behind it, you enter a pod with the door open, and pull the lever inside. The pod takes you deep, deep underwater, while playing you a small video from a projector. This is 1960, so it’s very old styled. This is the first time you hear the voice of Andrew Ryan, while he tells you his philosophy and why he hates the world as it is. His initial speech is the rule he will live by for the entirety of the game. He hates government, and religion, because as he says in the speech, they all believe “a man isn’t entitled to the sweat of his brow”. I’m probably phrasing it poorly, but he means the mans hard work. You then get the first view of his creation- Rapture, the city on the bottom of the ocean.

When the pod lands, you are met with the main enemy of this game- Splicers. I think this goes without saying but Rapture has some pretty advanced technology. They’ve learned to manipulate peoples DNA to extreme levels, giving them pyrokinesis and other things. These abilities are distributed in really cool looking bottles and are called Plasmids. There are many different types of Plasmids, but you’ll start with lighting in the beginning of the game

Splicers are the results of splicing your genes way too much; they’re like crackheads, but instead of cocaine they was gene splicing. Their faces are usually cutup and they’re usually absolutely insane. But after escaping the first one you meet, you get in contact with a man named Atlas. He tells you he wants to get the hell out of Rapture, and that Andrew Ryan is the reason it’s gone to shit. He tells you that he needs to get his wife and child out with him, but when you get so close to rescuing them, Ryan bombs the submarine they were going to escape on. 

Throughout your gameplay you will hear about the way Rapture used to be, before it was a warzone. You would hear about the power struggle between Ryan and someone named Fontaine, and you will learn about how Ryan killed his mistress who was pregnant with his child. This game is full of information explaining how things went down before your arrival. Unfortunately, I’m not the best with this kind of exposition. This is a personal thing but I always mess up the story when it comes to this form of story telling. 

Now I’m gonna try my best to explain something a bit weird. If you’ve ever seen anything bioshock, you probably know about their mascot, the Big Daddy. 

This right here is a Big Daddy. They’re not robots, more like giant brainwashed people in bit suits. Their voices are altered so they sound deep and menacing, and they’re by far the strongest enemy in the game. They’re made to protect the Little Sisters- the little girl next to the Big Daddy. Little Sisters are practically little blood suckers, they can sense where a dead body with some Atom (the substance they use in plasmids) and call them Angels. They’re children turned into indestructible mosnters that are just there to get Atom. They always travel together. You can kill the Big Daddy and either free the sister, or take the Atom from her body which would kill her. There’s a limited amount of Big Daddies and the game marks how many are left in each section. Obviously killing or saving these girls changes the ending you get. You team up with some german(i think) doctor that pretty much sees these girls as her daughters to stop Ryan and Fontaine, who wants to use them for more Atom. 

The rest of the story is a bit fuzzy for me, so I’m just gonna briefly explain it here. Fontaine wasn’t a good guy, and he faked his own death and turned out to be Atlas. He and a doctor (whos name I don’t remember but she was important) pretty much took you and wiped your memory, brainwashing you so that you’d always listen to the trigger ‘would you kindly.” This twist was the biggest mind fuck, because you realize that Atlas (now Fontaine) would say those words all the time. They planted fake memories of a family in your mind and sent you to the surface, and even the letter you were examining in the start had the trigger in it. You kill Andrew Ryan before this (forgot to mention it), and you move on to get rid of this brainwashing and kill Fontaine. And to fight you Fontaine fills himself with Plasmids and Atom and obviously this doesn’t work because video games. You end the game, saving all the little sisters and bringing them to the surface, and live out your life sort of as a father figure for them. Or if you didn't save them, you just bring a bunch of splicers with you, but I don’t think this is a canon ending. This game is a solid 6/10 for me, only because of how dated it is. 

Bioshock 2

Bioshock 2′s story is pretty much the same but with a twist this time- You get to play as a Big Daddy. Unfortunately this games story felt a bit too much like the first one so I don’t remember anything big about it. You play as a Big Daddy looking for his Little Sister. The game starts with a cutscene, showing you protecting her from splicers until you get murdered by Raptures new dictator- Sofia Lamb.  She takes your Little Sister and turns her into a normal girl again, raising her up to be Eleanor Lamb. You revive yourself years later (i don’t remember how) and go off to find her. The biggest difference between Andrew Ryan and Sofia Lamb is that the splicers seem to worship her. But at the same time Sofia uses Eleanor as some sorta messiah figure, so they could be worshipping her I don’t know. In this game you get to go through newer parts of Rapture, and even get to see the new variant of Big Daddy- Big Sisters. These aren’t like Big Daddies and I’m not even sure what their purpose is, but they’re just as difficult to fight against. I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to steal Little Sisters from their male counterparts and bring them to Lamb. Towards the end of the game, I’m pretty sure Lamb ends up destroying Rapture, and you escape with Eleanor, a bunch of Little Sisters, and depending on your ending you also save Sofia from drowning. This game was a 7/10, because the gameplay was much better but the story was sorta lackluster. I’m not even sure if this game is canon in the story.

Bioshock Infinite

Bioshock Infinite is the most different out of the three. I get the feeling that the devs got sick of the underwater aesthetic, so they said fuck it lets make a city in the sky. 

This is Columbia. A city in the sky. It’s the literal opposite of Rapture. It’s bright, it’s colorful, and it’s gorgeous. This was my favorite setting in the whole series. Plasmids are now Vigors, and it takes place in 1912 (I know, surprising). This games story is extremely complex, so if I get lost explaining it I’ll link a video explaining it clearly. In this game you play as Booker Dewitt.

Booker Dewitt is a former member of the Pinkerton National Detective Agency, scarred from the events of the Battle of Wounded Knee. When his debts from gambling start climbing too high, he is sent to Columbia to rescue a young woman named Elizabeth, who’s been trapped there since childhood. She’s kept in a giant statue protected by the Songbird, a giant bird with similar looks to the Big Daddies of Rapture. 

(This is Elizabeth btw. We never see Booker’s face except for some official art.)

All of Columbia is run by one man, Zachary Hale Comstock, He’s revered as some “Prophet”, and he seems to know everything about Booker.  He’s turned the people of Columbia into a sort of cult reminiscent of the KKK, based on Christianity and white power. Which makes him and all the enemies very easy to hate. Which is good. 

This cult is opposed by the Vox Poppuli, led by Daisy Fitzroy. She was originally the housemaid of Comstock’s home, but she fled when she was accused of murdering Comstock’s wife. She took her never ending hatred of Comstock and formed the Vox, a symbol of hatred for all of Columbia and men like Comstock. 

The story begins in July 1912, when Booker is taken to a lighthouse off the coast of Maine by two very odd twins, Robert and Rosalind Lutece (they are important later), being told “bring the girl and wipe away the debt.”  This lighthouse is very reminiscent of the old stone lighthouse from previous games. But this lighthouse doubles as a rocket silo, and Dewitt is sent to Columbia from here. 

The first thing that I personally noticed is Booker’s disdain for religion, because when he’s forced to be baptized to enter Columbia he’s extremely uncomfortable.  Soon he’s chased down by the authorities, since all of Columbia has been told by Comstock that any man with a scar on his hand in the shape AD is the devil, just like the scar on Booker’s left hand. 

After evading a lot of cops, we finally meet Elizabeth. She’s never really known anyone besides Comstock and the Songbird, and she’s missing a pinky. Besides that, she has a strange ability to create these tears in space time. The first time we see this is when she creates one to 1980′s Paris, a place she's always been desperate to go to. So they make a deal- She leaves Columbia with him and he takes her to Paris. 

After multiple shenanigans, Elizabeth ends up taking Booker and herself to a reality where Booker was the martyr of the Vox Populi. Booker sacrificed himself for Daisy here, and this started an all out war between the two factions. Fitzroy believes that the Booker we play as is either an imposter, or a ghost, and she sets her forces on him. With Bookers help, Elizabeth kills Daisy, and they try to escape via airship before Songbird forces them to crash.

At this point they learn a few things about Comstock; Comstock had the Luteces build a siphon device into the tower Elizabeth lived in to inhibit her powers, and he killed his wife and then the Luteces to hide the truth. Plus, Elizabeth is actually Comstocks adopted daughter. 

Elizabeth is kidnapped by Songbird. When Booker pursues, he needs to cross a bridge that happens to have a cloud passing through it. In the brief moment that clouds pass over the bridge, it goes from a bright sunset to a cold, windy dark snowstorm.  You fight through an old building filled with Comstock’s men, and learn that Elizabeth has already been tortured and corrupted by Comstock. She believes you left her there to die. And then, you learn that Comstock’s been dead for years now.  Then you finally meet Elizabeth, she shows you that you’ve been brought to 1984, and that she is using Columbia to attack New York. 

In that cloud over the bridge, you were running for what felt like a short time, but was really 72 years. Elizabeth sends you back, because she still doesn’t view you as an enemy, and she tells you how to save herself from Comstock, by controlling the Songbird. 

After freeing young Elizabeth, the pair assault Comstock’s airship, where Comstock and Booker argue about Booker’s knowledge of Elizabeth’s missing pinkie. This ends in Booker slamming the back of Comstock’s skull onto a baptismal font, right before drowning and killing him. They move on from the conversation, they use the Songbird to destroy the tower Elizabeth was held captive in, therefore destroying the siphon on her powers. 

Songbird turns on them again, but with the siphon gone, Elizabeth uses her powers to transport herself, Booker, and even Songbird to Rapture.  Booker and Elizabeth are inside, where they watch Songbird sink and die, being crushed by water pressure. 

At this point Elizabeth understands everything about her powers, and understands everything about whatever mystery there is left to this story. She takes Booker up the stone lighthouse, the very same one we saw in Bioshock 1, and basically explains multiverse theory to him. She explains that there are an infinite amount of lighthouses just like this. 

At this point, she knows Bookers history. She knows the truth, but Booker’s so traumatized that his brain legitimately erased the memory.  The rest of this is about Booker’s past, and how this all began. 

Booker was there for Wounded Knee. It traumatized him, made him resent himself, so some day he went to repent, to be baptized. But Booker couldn’t go through with it. he gained a massive debt, and in 1893, Robert Lutece approached Booker on behalf of Comstock, requesting that he “bring us the girl and wipe away the debt”, referring to Booker’s daughter, Anna Dewitt (hence, the AD on Booker’s hand.) Booker reluctantly agreed to hand off his daughter to wipe away his debt, but when he changed his mind, he chased Robert and Comstock down. Comstock tries escaping through a portal (the same portal Elizabeth can make btw) and the two struggle for the baby. Eventually, the portal closes, and Comstock snatches her away while the closing portal leaves her severed pinky in Booker’s hands. 

She explains that the Lutece’s have tried to recruit many Booker’s to stop Comstock, but all versions of Comstock will live on unless they try to stop his birth. So she takes Booker back to the baptism- but from another perspective. Booker changing his mind last minute at his own baptism sparked to life a universe where Booker went through with it, and was reborn from that moment onwards as Zachary Hale Comstock. After overusing the Lutece’s multiverse machine, he became sterile, and stole Anna to provide a biological heir for Columbia. 

We cut back to Elizabeth and Booker at the baptism pond, where multiple versions of her are appearing in front of him. The only way to stop Comstock is to kill Booker, so he allows them to drown him. And one by one, all the versions of Elizabeth disappear. 

This is the canon ending for the game. There are some more things in DLC, like Elizabeth going to Rapture to tie some loose ends connected to Comstock and Ryan’s abuse of the Little Sister’s. And it’s confirmed that Rapture scientists got the idea for Big Daddies from Songbird, and Columbia’s scientists came up with vigors from Rapture’s plasmids. The writers went as far to explain how everything in Rapture or Columbia came to fruition, and connected them all.

I’ve never gotten such an “It all makes sense now feeling” than when playing this game. They didn’t even have to connect it to the first two games but they did and they made it work way too well. Bioshock Infinite is the best out of the three, and thanks to this review I’ve finally gotten all that stuff out of my mind. This game is a 9/10 for me. I’d definitely play it again. 

[orihime00sama]

Tobitate! Hanafuda - Fate/Prototype Route

Hello!

This is a translation of the Prototype route of the Toraburu Hanafuda Travel Journal game included in the PS Vita version of Realta Nua, Team “Miss Ayaka and her Three Knights” AKA the Otome route.

This is my first time translating something like this and I’m far from being good at Japanese, so there’s a bunch of lines I’m not sure about. If you have any suggestion or correction, please let me know. I’ll also be linking the translations to the videos in case you want to check out the original (or just hear the voices).

——————

Sajou Residence - Part 1

Ayaka: Hello, everyone. To those of you who are new, nice to meet you. I’m Ayaka Sajou. It’s a long story, but I’m a Master in the Holy Grail War. My Master’s Degree is the Seventh. It’s the lowest, the weakest. Honestly, I want to quit right now, but the circumstances won’t let me. By the way, I don’t have any relatives. I lost my Dad in the previous Holy Grail War, and my elder sister who was one of the previous Masters is… well.

Saber: Ayaka, you didn’t check the mailbox yet, right? I’ll go do it. After that, let’s have some tea.

Ayaka: This is Saber. The first Servant I summoned and made a contract with. He’s the ideal good young man any girl thinks of, in other words, someone like Prince Charming[1]. He’s so perfect that it makes me feel uncomfortable. Also, he’s a bit of an airhead.

Lancer: Osu, good morning~. Oh, the fridge’s got a lotta ham, ain’t it. And there’s sliced bread and eggs and… All that kinda stuff, huh.

Ayaka: That’s Lancer. In the past, he was our enemy but now he’s a barbarian who lodges in our house and raids our fridge without permission. He may be a borderline trespasser, but he’s helped us out many times, so I’ve got no choice but to let him do it. Give and take, give and take. Besides… if you ignore his crude side, he’s the easiest to understand.

Lancer: Oh, you’ve got a serious face early in the morning, Missy. Back to your usual criticisms? Keep your self-hatred in moderation, ‘kay?

Ayaka: I don’t want to hear that from someone who rummages through our fridge with no warnings. Leave me alone. Lancer, are you off today?

Lancer: Ah, I’ve got no plans for today. I’ll tend to the Missy’s garden, or maybe play with the dogs.

Saber: Unfortunately, tending to the garden is my job. It is not your turn to act. Why don’t you get back to your original sheath, Lancer?

Lancer: I’ve been free from the start. But since the Missy asked me to guard[2] her, I gotta do my job. There’s still some unscrupulous bunch left around. Like, for example, a wolf[3] in prince’s clothing.

Saber: Bold of you to say that. Now then, is it an honour or an insult to be treated as a wolf by a wild dog? What do you think, Ayaka?

Ayaka: I don’t know! More importantly, what’s that envelope? There’s two of them.

Saber: Ah, it looks like they were delivered this morning. Here you go.

Ayaka: Err, let me see… “Are you familiar with the hot spring that can make any wish come true? Here is the oldest and best hot spot in Fuyuki City －However, only the wishes of the first group will come true. Please be ready.” … So it says. What is this, are they joking?

Lancer: Incredible… Is it an invitation to a Holy Grail War from another place? What, Holy Grail Wars can happen anywhere?

Saber: Doesn’t it have different rules from ours? Here, Ayaka, another one.

Ayaka: … This is a memo and … a ticket for the bullet train? Let’s see… “I’ll be waiting for you at the Fuyuki Holy Grail Hot Spring ♥" … They’re totally looking down on us.

Saber: So, the Fuyuki Holy Grail is actually a hot spring. Ours was a hellish cauldron, so I guess they’re not similar.

Lancer: A hot spring, huh, not bad at all. But well, this is up to you, Missy. What will you do? The other side even sent an invitation to make sure you’d go. Will you jump in?

Ayaka: … That… going by my life plans, I don’t want to go but… (Going by my feelings, it made me mad… Besides, if that hot spring that makes wishes come true is real, then…)

Archer: I have heard the whole story!

Ayaka: Archer!? Where did you get in from?

Archer: Obviously, from the window! Don’t worry about the little details, Ayaka! Else your cheek lines, lovely and beautiful as a flamingo, will fall.

Lancer: Is that a compliment? That’s a compliment, right?

Saber: What have you come here for, Archer? As you can see, we’re in the middle of a morning reunion. If you’ve come here to settle things, come back through the front door one hour later.

Archer: Hah, you fools. Are you even Heroic Spirits, those proclaimed to have no match on the earth? From the very beginning, we are those who bloomed on the battlefield. We respond to challenges, trample down our enemies, and gather treasures.

Archer: I don’t know about a war someplace else, but if it is a Holy Grail War, then it’s a given that Heroic Spirits would assemble. How can I call myself the original Heroic Spirit, the Senpai of Holy Grail Wars, if I don’t respond to this challenge!?

Ayaka: ………………

Saber: Hmph. As usual, you are a very hot-blooded man. If you want to fight, feel free to do it on your own. I’m against exposing Ayaka to danger.

Lancer: But being overprotective is also something to think about. The Missy these days isn’t as frail as you think, Saber. Or what? Are you holing up at home so you can keep her to yourself?

Saber: Wha－ I, I don’t have such impure thoughts often.

Ayaka: Let’s go! Saber, I’m going to this Holy Grail Hot Spring. Get prepared.

Saber: Ayaka!? Hah, it was already too late the moment you decided it. It can’t be helped, I’m not on board with this but I’ll accompany you.

Lancer: Missy, do you need your long weapon? If you need it, I’ll lend it to you.

Ayaka: Of course, come with us, Lancer. And you too, Archer. The four of us will conquer Fuyuki City.

Archer: Now you’re talking! As expected from my princess, you know the time to fight.

Ayaka: We’ll depart in 20 minutes. I have to go gather the bird feathers in the yard, so wait until then.

(She runs off)

Saber: Now you’ve done it, Archer. You’re always leading Ayaka down the bad path.

Archer: Good or bad is for Ayaka to judge. You cannot blame me. More importantly… Hey, lend me your ears. I have an idea.

Saber: ?

Lancer: Hn?

Archer: Hot springs are this land’s highest form of leisure. I’ve heard that they are summer resorts where lovers and married couples stay in. How about it? The one who does best in this expedition will get to be in the same room as Ayaka.

Archer: If it is a reward for the battle, even Ayaka who always has her guard up cannot oppose to it. And after your minds and bodies relax in a famous hot spring, the flower of romance will bloom.

Saber: …

Lancer: Incredible… Wait, this is all in your head, right? Didn’t you fail with terrible women?

Archer: It is unavoidable. To debauch is a king’s duty. I have the obligation of consuming fruit and flesh.

Archer: However, what I truly cherish is the one single flower. I’ve gotten tired of rotten meat and juice. Now, what will you do, Saber, Lancer? Will you take a knight’s oath?

Lancer: No, so we’re keeping it a secret from the Missy?

Saber: Okay, I will take it. The one who does best will share a room with Ayaka, right?

Lancer: You’re on board with this!?

Saber: Archer’s proposal makes sense. This is something I never imagined even in my dreams, but now I’ll work together with this man.

Lancer: Good grief… It can’t be helped, I’m on board. It’s a principle to have the feast in front of you, after all.

Archer: HAHAHAHA, how bold, wild dog! Now then, let us duel fair and square, with sharing Ayaka’s room as stake!

Ayaka: Sorry to keep you waiting. What are you four doing? Did you always get along like this?

Saber: N-no, we were just discussing something. Don’t worry about. Once the battle is over, I’ll tell you everything.

Ayaka: In that case, it’s fine, I guess… Well then, let’s go. I don’t know about the Fuyuki Holy Grail War, but let’s show them a difference in history!

(Stage 1 – Vs Team Tokiomi)

Victory Quote:

Archer (Prototype): You fools! You mediocre Heroic Spirits shouldn’t stand before me! Especially you, that golden one over there. Wearing a full body golden armour, there are limits to how inelegant you can be! In that case, I shall take it.

[1] Prince on a white horse

[2] Likely referring to how Lancer becomes her Servant after she lost Saber (and he lost Misaya)

[3] the actual word used was “Okuriōkami” (送り狼) which apparently is a term for “a ‘gentleman’ who escorts a woman home, only to make a pass at her”.

—————–

Fuyuki – Emiya Residence - Part 2

Saber: Ayaka, how about we have lunch here? This mansion is well-maintained, and perfect for resting. Besides, I feel a strange affinity to it. Especially to that storehouse. It must be a renown work of architecture, there’s no mistaking it.

Lancer: I’m more interested on the inside of the house. Like, a surprise attack from the ceiling of the living room. I wonder why Japanese-style houses are so full of openings.

Archer: I am interested in that wall. It may be inferior to skyscrapers, but it has quite the charm to it. Well now, let’s go climb it.

Ayaka: It’s embarrassing, so please don’t wander around too much. What are you, middle schoolers on a field trip!?

Saber: My apologies, that was rude. Indeed, it’s as you say. Even if they are our enemies, we should act in moderation. It’s unfortunate but let’s refrain from lunching. But you’re not taking a break, right? Are you tired, Ayaka?

Ayaka: U-Uh-huh. I’m getting used to the Hanafuda duels but… Isn’t this city weird? Everyone walking around has empty eyes like a dead fish. Could it be a characteristic of this provincial city? Look, there’s a harbour nearby, right? Like an octopus monster came from the sea and turned all humans into its familiars.

Saber: That’s “something like a summon “. You still have that hobby of reading gloomy books like always, Ayaka. Haha.

Ayaka: Don’t call them gloomy! Who cares about my hobbies? We are talking about the dead fish eyes! Look, right there!

Kiritsugu: *chewing*

Saber: …. T-that… His eyes really are empty…

Ayaka: Looks like he didn’t notice us… He’s just been there in a hiding spot, eating from a plastic piece.

Kiritsugu: *chewing* … This is Iri’s homemade cooking. I can eat it. Of course I’ll eat it. Even if it’s onigiri that changed like depleted uranium. *chewing* Ah, I’m happy… Shit, I’m so happy that I even started crying.

Ayaka: It’s better if we leave him alone. He’s gross.

Saber, I know you made this lunch, but let’s leave. I’m sorry, but let’s have it later… Saber!?

Artoria: *chewing* It has a nostalgic, wild taste from somewhere but it’s not bad. Ah, could you give me some tea, lady over there? I’m holding the turkey with both hands, so my hands are busy.

Ayaka: S-S-Saber turned into a girl!? W-what’s going on!?

Saber: Ouch… To suddenly strike my head from behind, that’s unbecoming of the chivalry code… Wait, who are you!?

Artoria: Hmph, from what I see, you are a naïve man, Pendragon. While you collapsed, I took your delicious lunch!

Ayaka: Even if you play it cool, you already ruined it! Saber, who is this? Could she be your younger sister?

Saber: That’s what I want to know! Who on earth are you!? If you are a knight even in the slightest, then name yourself!

Artoria: Hmph, you say “even in the slightest” after I got you, you make me laugh. I am both your shadow and a possibility of your future. *chewing* Draw your sword, Holy Sword Wielder. Show me how much power the original wields.

Saber: … I wonder what’s this feeling of disappointment I never felt before… However, as you can see, we are both of the Saber Class. As an opponent, there is nothing lacking about you. Lancer, Archer, don’t interfe—re!?

Lancer: Oouaahh, what’s up with this hawk!? Don’t pull my feather accessory! It’s not from your nest!

Archer: Aaargh, step back, Animose! Why are there gorillas around the wall!? And you, Roland, don’t swing me around!  Don’t swing me around!  

Irisviel: Ufufufufu, go get them, wire animals! Flying Guillotine (Hawk’s Name) on the tights-less Lancer! Gattling Brothers (Gorillas’ Name) on the nudist Archer!

Irisviel: If you’re going to make them, gorillas really are the way to go! Primitive power is really different!

Kiritsugu: Iri… What on earth happened? … No, I have to observe this place. I’ve got to find out the reason why the two of us were in a hole!

Irisviel: Ufufu, hahahahaha! Anyone who invades my Sweet Home with Kiritsugu won’t be forgiven! Prepare yourselves, I’ll whip you to the skin of the butt and then throw you out penniless!

Ayaka: And over here, an incredible beauty is getting drunk! What on earth is going on in this city!?

(Stage 2 – Vs Team Kiritsugu)

Victory Quote:

Ayaka: We went a bit overboard… but no matter how you put it, those guys were weird… What’s going on with this city’s Holy Grail?

—————–

Part 3

Fuyuki/Prototype Grail Pit - Part 3

Ayaka: Is this… Fuyuki’s Holy Grail Hot Springs? Rather than a hot spring, this…

Lancer: It looks exactly like our Greater Grail. Did we get tricked?

Archer: No, we probably just took the wrong path. My intuition tells me that if we had gone up on that last crossroad, we’d get to the hot spring.

Ayaka: Is that so? Archer’s got an amazing nose for money and treasures, so I think it might be true… but the ticket says that it should be around here.

Archer: Let me see that… Hoh, I see, so that’s what’s going on. The way is indeed correct. However, it is not meant for us! Saber, this concerns only you!

Saber: What? Why only me?

Archer: FUHAHAHAHA, you still don’t understand, you oaf? This ticket wasn’t sent to Ayaka! It is a love letter overflowing with love that pinpointed you!

Saber: Wha-what!? Don’t tell me… Then, the one waiting for me here is…!

Manaka: SABER!! You’ve finally arrived!  

Saber: !!!

Manaka: Jeez, your face turned so pale. You’re so happy that your face went stiff…Saber really is my prince! I love you! I love you so much to the point I’d sacrifice every life in this planet, Saber!

Lancer: Well, we’re off then. Hang in there, ladykiller.

Archer: Fu, so you’re dropping out alone. Time to pay the piper[1], Saber.

Ayaka: ………

Manaka Sajou. My sister, six years my elder. She’s Saber’s former Master who, in the previous Holy Grail War, advanced through almost invincible. I don’t like to talk about her so I’ll spare you the details, but if I had to describe her, I’d say she’s a super devilish genius who wouldn’t die even if you killed her.

Manaka: Now, come over here, Saber. I prepared a special bath just for you. Oh, unless you’d rather have dinner first? Or just like last time in front of the Holy Grail, YOU’LL • HAVE • ME?

Ayaka: Huh, this is the first time I’ve heard about this, Saber. So something happened between you and my Big Sister. In front of the Greater Grail, too?

Saber: T-this is a misunderstanding! What happened was that I impaled (with the Holy Sword) a mad Manaka from behind with a thud!

Ayaka: From behind… with a thud… for real!?                                            

Manaka: Uh-huh, that’s right♥!  That passionate way, it felt like the world froze for a moment… That’s why… I’ll do the same to you, Saber. Goes without saying, I’ll do it from behind. Leaving no gaps, every nook and cranny of your body. Just like a large-flowered flower. No, like the stars of the shinning sky. Receive my tentacles until you’re all shiny and slippery♥!

Saber: That’s no good, Manaka. It’s true that I betrayed you twice. The first time when I backstabbed you. The second time when I made a contract with Ayaka. So, I’m prepared to have you seek revenge.

Ayaka: Saber…

Saber: But, now let’s remember words of love that are more heroine-like. A girl your age shouldn’t say things like “receive my tentacles"⋆.

Lancer & Ayaka: Urk…!

Manaka: Saber…! Yes, from now on I’ll be more careful! How about the lovely “Manaka Slaughter Whips”?

Ayaka: I’ve been thinking about it since back then, but could it be that you actually are a perfect match for Big Sister, Saber?

Lancer: Well, they’re both airheads, after all. Maybe they could work out as lovebirds[2].

Manaka: That’s right, you people I don’t know. Saber and I are fated lovers. I won’t forgive you if you get in our way. Or rather, I don’t need you. I’ll burn you all on the Greater Grail later.

Ayaka: ….! Don’t tell me, the townspeople looking dead inside was your doing, Big Sister?

Manaka: Yes. Since I had spare time waiting for Saber to come, I went and took over Fuyuki City. After all, in a wedding ceremony, the more the merrier, right? Of course, right after that, I’ll turn everyone into zombies.

Ayaka: … I really can’t let her do as she pleases… I feel bad for her, but just by being here she’s evil. Saber, Lancer, Archer, let’s go! This time for sure, I’ll seal my relative’s disgrace!

Manaka: Fufufu, very well. Welcome, Miss Obstruction. I’ll play with you to kill my bore— Eh? Relative? You? Such a plain character?

Ayaka: Oh geez, you really couldn’t tell…! Just how self-centered are you, Big Sister?

(Stage 3 – Vs Manaka)

Defeat Quote:

Manaka: Ahh, you finally came back to my hands, Saber! First, let’s have some tea, then an afternoon nap. I have so much I want to talk about with you!

Victory Quote:

Ayaka: Thanks for helping me, everyone. I couldn’t have won alon— eh? The Hot Spring as the reward? Right after this? Well, it can’t be helped if it’s a reward but… I have a bad feeling about this…

[1] Just adding this here because this was actually my first time hearing this idiom:

to pay expenses for something, and thus be in a position to be in control;

to pay a monetary or other debt or experience unfavourable consequences, especially when the payment or consequences are inevitable or a result of something one has enjoyed.

[2] Baka couple

—————-

Fuyuki Holy Grail Hot Springs -  Part 4 - Ending

Ayaka: And so, after we safely defeated Big Sister, put her to sleep with a sleeping pill, coffin-packed and delivered her to the Church… we finally arrived at the Hot Spring, but…

Ayaka: No way, mixed bathing!?

Lancer: Oh, this is something you don’t see often these days. The guy who made this was really smart.

Saber: Yes, this is what they call gender equality. By the way, Lancer, how about taking at least a towel? It’s minimal manners to wrap it around your waist.

Lancer: My bad. It’s been so long that I’ve forgotten. What about you, swimsuits are forbidden, y’know? We’re both men, so there’s nothing to hide, right?

Saber: Of course, I didn’t bring such a boorish thing. Having a swimsuit is desecrating the hot springs. Isn’t that right, Ayaka?

Ayaka:  Argh, you guys— No, Lancer is one thing, but Saber! This is a mixed bath, are you okay with this!? Could it be you don’t understand the meaning of mixed bath?

Saber: I do. It’s a public bath without a men’s bath and a women’s bath. I’ve heard that this culture has been familiar to Japan since the Edo period.

Lancer: Yeah. Well then, I’m going ahead to the dressing room. You should hurry too, Missy. You promised that the reward would be the hot springs. Don’t tell me you’re going to take that back?

Ayaka: I-it’s true that I said that, but…

Saber: Ayaka, a lord must always go through with their servants’ rewards. It goes without saying, but that’s a condition to becoming a first-rate Master.

Ayaka: Wha-wha-wha—

Saber: Well, it’s my turn. Come, let us take off our clothes and enter the hot spring.

Ayaka: Guh, Saber you idiot———! I can’t believe that only at times like this you guys get along…! (But this is bad, this development is bad…! Think, me! I can’t avoid the mixed bathing no matter what… In that case… That’s right!)

Ayaka: Wait, you two. A little timeout! I’m going in first, so until then, don’t go in!

Lancer: Uh? Well, I don’t mind.

Saber: Neither do I. Both getting in first or getting in later are good.

Ayaka: Geez, those animals! Heh, but that became fatal. Just you watch, this is my counterattack.

(That huge wall behind her is the result)

Saber & Lancer: Y-you had that move!?

Ayaka: Uff, I’m saved… “Make a wall to separate the genders in the hot spring.” I ended up using it for such a stupid wish but it’s a story that sprang up from the start. I guess a wish like this is something within my means.

Lancer: How could this be? The Missy’s Eleventh-Hour strength is the real deal… What will we do, Mr. Knight? Even though the treasure is right in front of us, we’ve been left in limbo.

Saber: …. Lancer, no matter how you put it, we are weapons of mass destruction. The Noble Phantasms we wield are not for saving people.

Lancer: Right. Fine, let’s destroy it.

Saber: Yes, let’s destroy it.

Ayaka: Wh— I can hear you clearly from here! What are those two thinking!?

Saber: Let’s do it on 3. Even if it’s a wall created by the Holy Grail, if it gets hit by a direct hit of our Noble Phantasms—

Archer: Hold it! And you still call yourselves renowned Heroic Spirits? How can you not understand a bashful girl’s feelings!?

Archer: You fools! Cool down your heads and reflect on your actions! If you fool around in the bedroom, that’s your secret, but this is a hot spring! A place for decent relationships!

Lancer: What…

Saber: … on earth?

Archer: In the first place, seeing the bride’s nakedness is only after marrying properly! I, the King of Heroes, will not allow you to destroy this wall without Ayaka’s permission! Now, correct yourselves, you idiots! Listen well! I won’t let you disgrace Ayaka’s purity while I’m alive!

Saber: S-such seriousness! I can’t believe it, are you Ayaka’s mother?

Archer: At least call me her Big Brother! I have the “reliable university student senpai” position, after all!

Lancer: Oh, in that case, I’m the unpopular host of the neighbourhood. I’m one of the Missy’s senpai in senior high school.

Saber: Wha… Then, what about me? Rider is the classmate, so what other positions are there?

Archer: Hm… How about the blond exchange student who homestays at the Sajou house?

Lancer: Oh, that sounds nice. How about one who speaks Japanese in a funny way but is actually the prince of a certain country? It’s a pretty fitting role, right?

Saber: Guh… It’s frustrating but I can’t deny it.

Saber: It looks fun, so let’s think about the setting a little more. In the meantime, what does Ayaka do in the first place?

Ayaka: Like I said, I can hear you clearly. They’re getting all excited… Don’t they actually get along really well? Geez, and I’m the only one here… Oh well, I don’t mind. It’s a nice bath, and it’s a refreshing travel mood. I’m glad I came.

Ayaka: In reality, these are just alternate versions of ourselves, but doing something like this once in a while isn’t bad. Right, Dad?

Saber: By the way, Ayaka. Why did you, who hates fighting, decide to do it this time? Were you attracted by the hot spring?

Ayaka: Hn? It’s not that I hate fighting, it’s just that I don’t like going through scary experiences.

Saber: What?

Ayaka: This time it was full of opponents we’d obviously beat. It’s just like Archer said, we’re their senpais. That’s why I didn’t think we’d lose to anyone except Big Sister. After all, they were all within our range, right?

Lancer: …

Archer: …

Saber: I understand what you want to say. Yes. It’s hard to explain but the one I fear the most is Ayaka.

—————–

Random Duel Quotes:

Ayaka

“All right, all right♪!”

“Uwaah… What a careless mistake…”

“Too bad for you!”

“Yay!”

Saber

“I won’t give you any openings.”

“I’ll be taking that.”

Lancer

“You shouldn’t look somewhere else.”

“Guess this is what they call ‘killing two birds with one stone’.”

“I’m not done going wild yet.”

Archer

“Praise this unfaltering procedure!”

“Something like this isn’t enough!”

Ayaka & Saber

A: “Please, come to me! Saber!”

S: Yes, here I go, Ayaka!“

S: "You’re doing well, Ayaka.”

A: “T-thanks… This is just the usual, though.”

S: “What, this is just a scratch.”

A: “Are you alright, Saber?”

Ayaka & Lancer

L: “Let’s start, Missy?”

A: “Right, this time it’s a speed match, Lancer!”

A: “Good job, Lancer.”

L: “Not yet, there’s still more to come, Missy.”

L: “Ouch…!”

A: “Lancer, here, have some ointment!”

Ayaka & Archer

A: “Are you alright, Ayaka?”

A: “Y-yes, thank you very much.”

Tokiomi & Kotomine

T: “Impossible! I refuse to accept such an ending!”

K: “Hoh? Are you that frustrated, my teacher?”

Gilgamesh:

“Rather than the nonsense of victory or defeat, what truly is an eyesore is that conceited, prideful face of yours! Let us continue. I won’t allow you to refuse!”

Artoria & Iri:

A: “I’ll stave them off here. You have to retreat!”

I: “It’s alright, Saber! Believe in your Master!”

Irisviel:

“Hanafuda duels sure are fun, Saber!”

“Whatever it takes, right?”

Artoria:

“If you still will not give me your name, then stand up and come at me!”

Kerry & Iri:

K: “It’s enough, Iri. We have to retreat for now.”

I: “Y-yes… I’m sorry, dear.”

Manaka:

“For a mere toy to try to defy me.”

“Come forth, city of decadence. The night is long, sweet and cruel.”

“You do really cruel things to a lady.”

“Save me, Saber!"  

—————— Character art

Ending CG in high quality

————–

My Final Thoughts