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sootygoggles · 4 years ago

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Parent!Paranoia Sanders Sides AU!

No explanation, but I'll probably give the backstory later. For now: memes of Paranoia being an A-class parent and a chaos gremlin. (okay it started as memes but then just ended up as fleshing the AU out)

Paranoia, worried abt his kids: I'm uhhhh gonna go to my room see ya later light sides

Paranoia, sneaking back into the subconscious to check on his now teenaged children: I'm gonna leave duke a r a t that I found and thought looked cool

Duke, waking up the next morning and yelling for 'Nesty bc "HOLY CRAP NESTY LOOK AT THIS RAT ISN'T SHE ADORABLE I WANNA HANG HER ON THE WALL": !!!!!!!!!!

Paranoia gets a habit of sitting on the fridge because his children were wild as kids and sometimes duke comin at you with a knife warrants jumping onto counters

Nesty, who doesnt get paid to deal with duke: I'm raiding dads liquor cabinet it's my due for putting up with this

Paranoia, physically manifesting: put the key to the liquor cabinet D O W N, Honesty

The lights are confused as to why he disappears at random times of the day and night and he just "leave me TF alone before I leave you a goshdarn diddly P R E S E N T while youre sleeping I'm tired"

patton: my child! my dark strange son!!

paranoia, who has children: ,,,,yea ok

Patton ticks him off so he leaves a big halloween decor spider on his bed and nobody sleeps for weeks after that bc pattons too scared to touch it and paranoia maybeperhaps glued it onto his cover

He's like one of those people you know might mean well but ooooooo boy theyre pushin buttons

Paranoia, whos fav animal/insect is spiders and whose children have tarantulas and snakes on the regular: hes not even realistic!! You need to learn to get along with mr sparkles patton!! look at him. he's fluffy!

He has googly eyes and glitter on him at all times of course hes named mr sparkles

paranoia gets to be a little petty. as a treat

Paranoia just carries bags of glitter around and whenever mr sparkles gets duller he takes mr sparkles to the kitchen counter and he dumps glitter on him

Logan and patton are tired of cleaning up bc paranoias just petty enough to make their counters eternally sparkly

"why is there glitter all over the kitchen?"

paranoia, holding mr sparkles: :)

Paranoia, after AA: I hate purple but they dont know that now do they

Paranoia is actually orange the last side is purple lol

Chaos Gremlin dark sides and nobody is surprised bc paranoia raised them

paranoia, going back to see his teen children after acting like a teen all day: what is up, fellow kids

honesty: i am going to lose it

Wrath, coming to yell at them to keep it down: why are you purple I'm purple

Paranoia, cackling bc finally I can get out of this horrible color: *snaps fingers * I'M PARANOIA MOTHERTRUCKERS HAVE FUUUNNNNN I'M GONNA BE MAKING YOUR LIVES LIVING HELL FROM THIS POINT FORWARDS

duke and nesty, pumped for halloween bc u l t i m a t e s p o o k: :D

paranoia, coming out in a traffic cone costume with a shit eating grin on his face: :D

Paranoia, decorating for halloween bc "oh I'm sorry it's just the *sniffles * homesickness and we a l w a y s decorated for halloween" knowing full well all of his decorations are spider and witch themed bc they all like the salem witch trials

He leaves ONE fake snake in romans cereal and the lights just. Lose it. Hes kicked back into the subconscious to be chaotic with his kids, no new side, just the hours upon hours of film hes gotten from the bugs hed placed around the unconscious and a plan for the next several movie nights

He gets back and honesty is w h e e z i n g bc he was watching through the cracks and they make a fail compilation of the light sides

It takes like two months for the lights to just go insane with him around not due to yknow paranoia but bc hes such a gremlin

Patton asks if he was raised by wolves and he shoves mr sparkles at patton saying "take the issue of how I was raised up with my father, a-hole!!"

He doesnt actually curse he just yells "A-HOLE" so loud his kids can hear

They dont find out he's a dad until hes summoned and hes making cookies or smt with the kids and hes in a bright orange stereotypical witch outfit,,, corset and all and an apron that says "worlds most chaotic dad" on the front

And hes talking to one of the kids like "duke you can only put dish soap in your batch nesty cant digest it like you can"

Patton has an apron that says worlds least chaotic 'dad' courtesy of paranoia he made it himself(read: he stole pattons good apron and scribbled over it in sharpie)

Paranoia is always close to cackling when around the lights bc theyre newbs to any chaos

Roman and remus are twins but roman is the kind of kid to promptly forget abt anyone and logan n patton knew remus less than a day before he "disappeared" aka ran to the subconscious to explore and theyve just kinda blocked him out

Logans fine with it and actually likes the decorations tho he has asked if they had to be so brightly coloured and if there had to be so much glitter

I say decorations but hes a secret gremlin at heart and is super close to snickering at all times bc of the pranks

Also yes paranoia mildly dads roman it's great but he dads in an older sibling type way

So pat and logan are all "hes fitting in as an older brother well" and they tell him abt their approval of his older brother chaos and hes just like "no this is how I am deal with it nothing to do with brothers" bc hes not telling them abt his kids he doesnt trust them

Hes up at like midnight complaining with logan abt how patton doesnt let him be full chaos gremlin and logan says "mmmhmm did your parents in the dark side let you go wild with the chaos" and paranoia just,,,,, looks at him, dead in the eyes, and says "I dont have parents"

Cue logan being confusion

Paranoia, who genuinely didn't have parents: my parents are mr sparkles and the cat we've had for my entire life

Logan, who doesnt know they had a cat and is now worried bc "are you taking care of it???": ???

Paranoia: it's great for keeping the Others in line tho I just say "do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin" and they do their chores while I'm making dinner

logan, incredibly confused: i don't know what you mean but ok

Paranoia: yeah theyre dumb but it's the level of dumb youd expect from my idiots

Or he slips up and refers to them as his children/kids and logan, not realizing they have an Actual Father/Sons relationship/age difference(paranoias abt.late 20s early 30s, remus defies all logic and has been about 9-10 for a few years now, and dees like early teens) just says "huh how.interesting would it be to have to deal with people your age that immature" and paranoias just. "Y e a h t h e y r e t o t a l l y t h e s a m e a g e a s I a m"

Duke is very much baby and upon seeing duke eating glue paranoia and honesty the idiots decided to try it too

theyre so dumb dsdhdhdhjsdh

They AREEE and paranoia, after discovering that duke has the h a r d i e s t immune system they decide to test exactly what he can and cannot safely eat bc he may be dumb but hes also def a Dad and he just wants to take care of his kids and if that includes making sure that duke can safely consume toilet bleach then so be it

Duke can eat almost anything short of actual cyanide but cyanide just makes him sick like stomach bug sick

He somehow gets a fever,,,,, he has it for like half an hour and paranoia is amazed

Hes in bed,,,,, paranoia makes him soup,,,,,, hes all better and running around again

Paranoias parenting rules:

Dont murder your brothers pls

Do your chores or no snuggle time with ms peregrin

Glitter is always a yes

Insults are fine just make sure you dont overstep and make your brothers insecure

all of them are printed and then the last one is scrawled at the bottom in

If you get sick, tell him immediately bc he will find out and he will be the most obsessive parent to make sure you feel better ASAP

If your pronouns/name/function change, tell him immediately, he'll make sure you dont feel uncomfortable as well as he can

Duke dont put dish soap in honestys baked goods you know he cant digest it

It's a nice system for making chaos but keeping it manageable

They're all printed then the last one's scrawled in glitter gel pen and duke wrote a reply that said (I'm sorry yall dont have as good an immune system as I do)

There was a whole passive aggressive arguement on the bulletin for the next week before it got taken down to make room for dukes art

They eventually started just putting them up over each other and using magnets instead of thumbtacks

The entire bottom portion of the walls are painted in chalkboard paint so theres no unerasable drawing on the walls and the rest of the paint is magnetic so they can hang pieces everywhere

Dukes improving rapidly tho and doesnt like looking at his old art all the time so paranoia holds onto the drawings in several filing cabinets in case he ever wants to do redraws or needs his original prints to make something in the Imagination

also bc,,, sentimental

jus a little

Yeah bc "yes my child draws nothing but blood gore and new animals but hes a creative genius and I love all of his art"

Roman: anxiety I can see why you left

Paranoia: ??? What?? It's spoopy season??

Roman: there was BLOOD on the WALLS

Paranoia, internally: oh!!!! Duke perfected his blood recipe!!!!

Paranoia, externally: how did it taste?

Roman: WHO TASTES THE BLOOD ON THE WALLS?!?!

Paranoia: if it tasted like lemons or citrus you need to stay off of most foods, stick to crackers and broth- don't eat anything heavy until you're sure you wont throw it up

Patton, who was making cereal: ????

Also!!!! @iliveinprocrasti-nation Thanks for helping me flesh this AU out!!!

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kittysukagasterfics · 6 years ago

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Tough Break

Note: And fluffiness train chugs on! Seems like it’ll never stop! >:3 Anyway, onto the fic!

Handplates belongs to: @zarla-s

Requested by: Anonymous

Summary: Seems like Gaster had come down with a cold! As his temporary caretaker, will Sam be able to get this stubborn skele to rest?

Sam sighed in content as they sipped on their cup of golden flower tea. The Human was currently sitting on the kitchen counter, waiting for the toaster to pop and coffee to brew. They were also waiting for the oven to heat up so the croissants could bake. Gaster would always tell them that they didn’t need to make him and the brothers meals all the time but Sam insisted. So now Sam cooked nearly everyday for skeletons and they couldn’t be more happy about it.

'*You place the croissants in the oven just as you hear Gaster walk in.’

They turned around with a smile to greet him, only for them to stop mid-sentence. Gaster was stumbling as he walked into the kitchen. His face seemed flushed with darker circles than usual under his eye sockets. Gaster was also holding his skull, seemingly in pain. He merely mumbled a ‘good morning’, not even bothering to scold them for sitting on the counter like he usually would. Gaster nearly fell over as he walked so Sam had to quickly go over and guide him to a chair to sit down in.

“*You ask him if he’s alright.” ‘*He takes a while to respond to you...’

“I...I’m fine, Human. Just a little tired, that’s all...”

The Human gently placed a hand on his forehead. It felt very warm to the touch, probably due to a fever. Not even waiting to finish breakfast, Sam picked Gaster and carried him to his office. He tried to protest and get out of their hold but he soon became too weak to fight. Entering the room, the Human laid the skeleton on the couch before covering him with a soft blanket. They told him that he’s not feeling well so he needs to rest. Gaster didn’t take too well to this though.

“I’m not sick, Sam. I just didn’t get much sleep last night.”

“*You ask him to explain to you why his forehead is burning up then.” ‘*He has no answer...’

Gaster then began to argue about how much work he needed to get done. How he needed to write up reports for Alphys and how the brothers had to do tests. The Human tried to suggest that they could do some of his work for him but by the unamused look on Gaster’s face, Sam could tell that he never forgot the last time they ‘helped’ him with his work. They just told him to lay down and get some rest while they look after the brothers and Toby. Once again he tried to protest.

“I’m not going to just lay here, Human, I need to get some important work done.”

“*You threaten not to give him any breakfast if he doesn’t.”

“...On second thought, maybe some rest will do me some good...”

He laid down as instructed and Sam left the room to finish up breakfast.

~~~~~~

Sam carried two plates of food and a dog bowl toward the cell room. The brothers and Toby greeted them with hungry excitement. The Human smiled as they gave them each their food. The three must’ve been really hungry as Sam had to tell them to slow down their eating. While the brothers and Toby ate, the Human told of how there wouldn’t be any tests for today. Subject 1 & 2 were obviously surprised and slightly relieved by this.

“did you finally convince him to let us take a break?”

“YOU’RE SO LAZY, BROTHER! BUT, WHY AREN’T WE HAVING TESTS TODAY, HUMAN SAM?”

“*You tell them that Gaster isn’t feeling well today and you have to take care of him.”

The brothers didn’t quite understand but they were excited nonetheless about not having to do any sort of test. Sam gave them the Rubik’s cube to play with for the time being and gave Toby his favorite squeaky toy bone. With the babybones and puppy kept busy, the Human went to the medical room where they knew the thermometer and medicine. Of course, they had to use a step stool to actually reach the cabinets where the items were kept. They grabbed the items and walked over toward the office where Gaster was supposed to be resting. Instead, however, the Human found him writing on his clipboard.

“*You begin to scold Gaster as you take the clipboard from him.”

“Sam, did you not hear me when I-*cough cough!*”

When he tried to protest again, Gaster suddenly broke out into a harsh coughing fit. Sam helped him lay back down as they took his temperature. While waiting for it to beep, Sam poured some medicine on a spoon as they told him how the brothers and Toby were fed and mostly keeping busy. After hearing the thermometer beep, the Human took it out and read the numbers: 101.4. Just high enough to be considered a fever. Sam gave him the medicine as they gave him pets. They giggled when Gaster grimaced from the taste of the liquid.

“*You offer to make him some soup to help him feel better.” ‘*He gives you a tired look.’

“You know you don’t have to go through this much trouble for me, Human...”

But Sam just told him that they were just returning the favor from when they were sick. Giving the skeleton a reassuring kiss, the Human headed towards the kitchen to make soup for lunch.

~~~~~~

Sam petted the brothers and Toby on the head as they handed the three their lunch. They warned about how the soup was still hot before heading towards the work room with another bowl. The Human greeted Gaster only to see him once again writing on his clipboard. They once again scold him for working when he should’ve been trying to sleep.

‘*You grab the clipboard and toss it to the other side of the couch.’

Before he could protest this time, Sam made him scoot over so they could lay down next to him on the couch. He had a few objections to this.

“You’re going to get sick again, Sam...”

“*You tell him you’re not worried about your health right now...”

Gaster didn’t get to say anything else as the medicine made him sleepy and he and Sam fell asleep cuddling, their SOULs glowing in sync with each other as they slept.

~~~~~~

Gaster could hear them crying, begging Asgore to SPARE them. Knowing his king, Asgore was probably regretting initiating this fight in the first place. But he needed one more human SOUL and Asgore couldn’t just pass up this opportunity. Gaster had tried to convince him otherwise but the King wouldn’t listen. He saw the poor thing staring at him, their eyes pleading with him to help them. But...there was nothing he could do, not at this point. Suddenly, Asgore raised up his trident before swinging it down to finally take the red SOUL...and Gaster just stood there watching.

~~~~~~

Gaster woke up with a start, gasping. He took a minute to take deep breaths to calm himself down, just like Sam had taught him to do. That’s when he noticed Sam was stirring awake as well. At first Gaster thought he had woken them up but they suddenly sat straight up, tears running down their face. He immediately wrapped his arms around them, trying to ignore his pounding skull.

“Did you have a nightmare, Sam?”

‘*You nod as you cry into Gaster’s chest.’

He then asked them to tell him about it and Sam relayed how they were killed while surrounded by little yellow flowers. They couldn’t see who exactly killed them though. Sam also told how there was another person as well, who they also couldn’t tell the identity of. Gaster listened intently to all this, a cold shiver running down his spine and he didn’t think it was from the sickness. Not wanting to worry the Human though, he stroked their hair in a comforting manner to lull them back to sleep. As soon as he heard their even breaths, he used his magic to grab his clipboard and began writing notes.

‘Not sure if it was coincidence or not but it appears Sam and I have the ability to ‘co-dream’ together. The Human doesn’t seem to have realized it yet. Maybe it has something to do with our SOULs being connected? Will have to look more into this when Sam confirms I’m well enough to work again...’

Putting the clipboard down beside him, Gaster yawned and held Sam close to him as he fell back into Dreamland.

Note: Happy Spoopy month everyone! I hope you’re already putting up your decorations and eating lots of candy! (But not too much candy ;3) Thank you all so much for reading! I love all of you! Stay tuned for more.

#undertale #handplates #gaster #the human #sam (the human)#sans #papyrus #toby #my fic #request #ukagaster

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side-effect-of-the-meds · 6 years ago

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Okay!!! Desperate for twinyards :D!!! Will Aaron ever found out that erin takes care of him when he is drunk? And will he find out that Aaron cares for him and will there ever be a point where the things he said when he is drunk would be said when be isnt? Gosh im such trash for your fem!andreil

I’m so sorry these asks keep taking so long! They take me thirty years to get to and then they turn out really bad. One day I’ll start creating quality content. Until then, have this.

In honor of Spoopy Month, it’s Halloween themed!!!!! (I borrowed a big chunk of it from my canon compliant fic Love of my Life but I just really like that part of the story. Sorry :))

“I never thought Crowley and Aziraphale would ever return to Eden,” Ronnie said as the Monsters made their way to the bar. Ania smiled. Erin scowled. “Aw don’t scowl at me like that, Angel.” Ronnie barely dodged the heels Erin chucked at her. With a broad smile, Ronnie turned her attention to Aaron. “I’m sorely disappointed to see that you’re not the Archangel Micheal.” Aaron glared at her but his annoyance didn’t last.

Aaron could never stay mad at Ronnie for long. For the longest time, Ronnie had been the only ray of sunshine in Aaron’s dreary life. The middle child and only daughter of a rich widower, Ronnie was free to do as she pleased while her father groomed her brothers to inherit his fortune. Having four brothers would be more than enough for most people but Ronnie hadn’t hesitated to adopt Aaron into her little band of miscreants. In the years before Erin’s arrival, it was Ronnie (and at times, her brothers) that had been looking out for Aaron. She was just as much his sister as Erin was. That was what made their relationship so hard for him to wrap his head around. He’d given up trying to make sense of how they could have gone behind his back like that long ago but on nights out at Eden’s he couldn't help but feel a little betrayed.

“Earth to Mikey,” Ronnie said, waving a hand in front of his face. “Come on, we’re toasting you’re little cheerleader. To Katelyn,” Ronnie cried as she raised her own shot. “For breathing -or maybe blowing- some life into Aaron!” Aaron shrieked at the crude joke as his family laughed, downing their shots. Aaron’s brain short-circuited at the sight of Erin downing her shot to the toast. She just wants to drink, Aaron told himself as he regained control of his thoughts. Curling himself into his shoulders, he stood apart as Ronnie caught up with the others.

“Aaron,” Josten said as she nudged his foot with her boot. “Erin said to grab a table.” Aaron nodded and headed off to search for one. Despite the pounding music, he heard Josten following him. He risked a backward glance only to find her watching him. He growled but Josten’s face remained blank. She’s been spending too much time with Eri, he thought as he went back to shouldering his way through the crowd. Finally, he found a table in the back of the club with just enough chairs for them. Without hesitating, he sank into one only to find it covered in something sticky and white.

“Oh Hell no,” he screamed as he leaped up. Josten peered over at his seat before doubling over in a fit of laughter. “Fuck off, Josten.” He snatched the paper towels she offered him out of her hands and did his best to clean himself off before kicking over the chair.

“I see temper tantrums run in the family,” Josten remarked. Aaron looked over at her. She was staring out across the dancefloor, a soft smile on her face. Following her gaze, he spotted Erin flickering in and out of view from where she still stood at the bar. A pang shot through his chest. Ania looked at Erin the same way Erik looked at Nicky- the same way Katelyn looked at him.

“Damn you, Josten,” he said, more to himself than her.

“I’m already damned,” she replied anyway. “I’m damned to spend the rest of eternity in love with your sister but if that isn’t damnation at its best, I don’t know what is.”

The world tilted beneath Aaron’s feet. Love. Ania had said she loved his sister. His Erin. His Little Doe. Tears spilled from Aaron’s eyes. “If you hurt her…” he said, his voice breaking before trailing off entirely as he gulped for air.

“She’ll kill me herself,” Ania answered easily. She reached a hand out and carefully wiped a tear from his face. “Don’t cry. Eri’ll skin me alive if you do.”

“Does she even care?” he asked. Aaron tried to smile as he asked it but he knew it came out as more of a grimace than a smile. A wave of sadness crashed down over him at the sound of his own words.

"Of course she cares, you cracked walnut," Josten snapped. As the strobing lights passed over her countenance Aaron could see the fury on her face. "I've only known her a year. You've known her for three? Four? How the hell can you not-" Josten stopped short. "It's because you're always drunk," she said quietly.

"No. That's Kevin," Aaron said.

"Whenever we're here. Whenever we go home, you're too drunk to remember."

"Remember what?"

Josten worried her lower lip, weighing her words "Don't drink tonight." She clamped a hand over his mouth before he could protest. "Trust me. You'll see."

"Trust a liar?"

"I wouldn't lie about Erin." It sickened Aaron to know she was telling the truth. For the remainder of the night, to Kevin's delight, Aaron discreetly pawned his drinks off to him. Where Erin excelled at faking the drug-induced mania she’d lived with for the last two years, Aaron excelled at faking a drunken stupor. Or at least, he usually did. Keeping up the act was much harder than Aaron anticipated. He was far too preoccupied keeping an eye on his sister to fully concentrate. A few rounds in, he gave up watching her in favor of retreating to the dance floor. At least there, he wouldn’t be under her constant scrutiny.

He was wrong. Each time the crowd parted enough for him to have a clear view of the ledge where he’d left them, he found Erin’s eyes trained on him. No matter where he went or what he did, she was watching him. Beads of sweat formed along his forehead. Had she seen through his ruse? Did she know he was faking?

There was nothing Aaron could do now but pray. He passed the remainder of the night on the floor with Nicky. Around 11:50, Ronnie called out for the final round. Josten was by Aaron’s side in an instant.

“Throw your legs onto Nicky’s lap in the car. And talk to Kevin about something- anything. Make him laugh.” Aaron broke his facade to shoot a confused look at her. “Just do it,” Josten pleaded. Aaron ground his teeth together as he considered his options. After a moment he gave her a sharp nod and made his way over to the counter with her to collect the final round.

In the car ride home, Aaron did as he was told. He threw his legs over Nicky’s and leaned heavily against Kevin. Kevin wrapped an arm around Aaron, who tensed immediately. Kevin Day was not known for his compassion nor for his affection. Catching the warning look Josten shot him as she buckled her seatbelt, he forced himself to relax. For once in his life, Kevin wasn’t talking about Exy. Instead, he was giving a lecture on the unabridged history of the LGBT community. Aaron tentatively slid his own commentary into the lesson. To his relief, both Kevin and Nicky laughed. He choked on the soda he was drinking when he saw the upward curl of Erin’s lips in the dashboard mirror.

Nicky got out of the car first as it rolled to a stop on the drive. He toppled face-first into the grass and laughter burst out of Aaron. He felt something pressing at his back and before he knew it, he toppled out of the car too.

“You drunk bastard,” Erin said. Aaron’s heart stopped as he rolled onto his back. Erin was standing over him, a brilliant grin plastered to her face. “That’s what you get for drinking so much” She bent down and scooped him up in an easy, obviously practiced, motion. Aaron was too shocked to say a word.

Aaron was suddenly thirteen again. He was sitting curled up on his mother’s bed with the handset pressed to his ear. A woman's voice drifted through it. She was talking about a girl named Erin. The woman was gushing about how happy she was to have found Erin’s birth mother, and her brother too. Brother, Aaron thought. He felt his heart racing in his ribcage. I’m- I’m a brother! A twin brother! Aaron had been over the moon at the very thought of meeting his sister.

The voice of his mother sent him crashing back down to earth. She hissed at the woman to keep her fat mouth shut. She didn't want to know anything about Erin. She wanted nothing to do with her and she certainly did not want Aaron seeing her again either. She slammed the phone down so hard that Aaron jerked the phone away from his face. Silently, returned the phone to its cradle and crawled back to his own room. Drawing his legs in, he tried to hold in his grief. Hot tears streaked down his face as his shoulders shook. Anger coursed through his veins. Clenching his jaw, he unfurled himself and stalked into the kitchen. He grabbed a notebook and pen from the kitchen and ran out of the house. He raced down the block to the park. Seated at one of the picnic tables, his pen flew across the page. He wasn't quite sure what he'd written, only that he had to send it before his mother ever found out. He stopped by the fountain on his way out of the park. He would need money to send the letter. With a grimace, he peeled his shoes and socks off. Wading through the fountain, he collected every penny, nickel, and dime he could find. This isn't stealing, he told himself. They threw their money in here. Even if it is, it doesn't matter. This is for my sister. This is for Erin.

Every day for the next two weeks, Aaron checked the mail in the hopes of finding a response to his own letter. When it came, Aaron nearly had a heart attack on the spot. He sat down on the steps in front of the house. With shaking fingers, he carefully opened the letter. A brilliant smile plastered itself across his face when he saw the chicken scratch that filled the page. It looked just like his own handwriting. Unfortunately, his smile had been quick to fade. Erin had only written back to tell Aaron that she didn’t want him around. She was more than happy to remain with Cassidy and her new brother, Drake. Aaron grabbed desperately at his chest. It felt as though some hand had forced its way into his ribcage and ripped his heart out. New brother, Drake. Tears fell onto the page. Ink ran, blurring the words into one another. Aaron ripped up the remnants of the letter up and hurled them in the bin. He collapsed on the kitchen floor, sobbing. Great, he thought. Fucking great. It doesn’t matter. I don’t need her. I don’t need anyone. I hope I never meet Erin or her new brother Drake.

But Aaron had. He had been sat down across from her in a juvenile detention facility, three feet away from her, separated by a four-inch pane of bulletproof glass. Looking at Erin was like looking through a funhouse mirror, it was him but something wasn’t quite right. Sure, Erin’s hair was longer than his, ending harshly at the edges of her jaw and she had a few more moles than he did but that wasn’t it. Maybe it was the seemingly permanent downwards tug of her lips. Maybe it was the bold set of her shoulders that exuded a confidence Aaron could only dream of.

Maybe it was her eyes. They were the same brown as his but where his were full of pain and fear, hers were empty. Two empty pits stared back at him from across the table. The glass may have been designed to protect him from Erin’s fists but it did nothing to save him from her eyes. So empty. So soulless. Aaron had once heard that there had been a time when people had refused to take photos for fear that they stole the souls of the photographed. At the time, Aaron had scoffed at the people for being so stupid. Now, Aaron understood. Sitting before his sister, he feared that if he stared too long into her eyes, she might steal his to replace the one she lacked. They were so cold. So empty. So loveless. On the plane back from Cali, Aaron closed his eyes only to find his sister engraved on the back of his lids.

Back in Columbia, Aaron stood before Nicky’s full-length mirror. He’d tugged a skull cap down over his head. His bangs poked out from beneath, matching Erin’s to a T. He blinked and it really was Erin staring back at him in the mirror. Reaching a hand out, he traced a finger down her cheek. Her cold eyes stared back at him and realized why he couldn’t look directly at them. They were their mother’s eyes. When Tilda Minyard wasn’t drunk or high, she was empty.

There wasn’t very much Aaron knew about his father other than the fact that his mother had eloped with him once she’d learned of her pregnancy. Tilda was three and a half months pregnant when Micheal Minyard died in a car crash. Depression coaxed Tilda back into old habits that Micheal had helped her break. She began drinking and chain-smoking despite the twins she bore within her. Both twins were born with fetal alcohol syndrome, manifesting in their stunted growth, ADHD, and Aaron’s dyslexia. Erin had developed a nicotine addiction as well. It wasn’t until after Aaron had found out about his twin that Tilda had told him this.

“I didn’t even want you,” Tilda mused as she took another swig from her whiskey bottle. “I wanted Erin but your names sound so similar that the shitty ass nurse fucked up and gave me the wrong one. You never stood a chance with me,” she said. “I was never going to love you.” Tilda swung the bottle at the side of Aaron’s head. It connected with his skull and rattled his brain but it wasn’t enough to dislodge the words from it.

Aaron pressed his forehead up to the mirror. Up to Erin’s forehead.

“Do you know why Mom doesn’t love us?” he whispered. “It’s because no one loved her. No one but Dad but he’s long gone. It’s his fault, you know? Luther’s, I mean. Mom is the way she is because her own brother didn’t love her enough. He didn’t love her enough to let her stay once she got pregnant. He didn’t love her enough to help her take care of us. He didn’t love her enough to protect you.” Tears slid down Aaron’s face as his grip on the mirror’s frame tightened. “Luther might not have loved his sister, but I’ll love you til the day I die.” Looking in the mirror, Aaron saw himself again but it wasn’t the same Aaron he’d grown accustomed to seeing. This one had fire. This one had fight. This one would protect his sister, no matter the cost. This one was going to save his sister from devolving into the monster their mother had become.

That Aaron failed. Erin was just as cold and empty as their mother had been. That Aaron failed. Erin was forced to face Drake all on her own. Every night, he lay awake wondering what horrors his sister faced behind the pristine white walls of Easthaven. No amount of kisses and cuddles from Katelyn were enough to bury the weight of Aaron’s broken promise. Guilt and regret intertwined, winding around Aaron and choking the life out of him. He broke down constantly, reduced to a sobbing mess by the weight of his woes.

Aaron loved his sister more than life itself. Erin was indifferent to him. Upon her return from Evermore, she hadn’t even spared him a passing glance. Instead, she’d fixated upon the child Josten had brought home. Aaron had never expected his sister to fawn over him. It wasn’t in her nature. Or so he had thought. It was because of this that Aaron couldn’t help the spike of jealousy that shot through him as he watched his sister’s shoulders soften when she held the baby. He could barely contain the scowl he felt tugging at his lips as Erin brushed her lips against the backs of Cleo’s hands.

Cradling Cleo close he asked her, “What makes you so special? I know why Erin lets Ania have what she wants but what about you? You’re just a baby. I’m her brother. Am I not good enough for her?” Tears splashed down onto Cleo’s face and he hurried to wipe them off of her. As he did, he felt Cleo’s tiny hand wrap around his little finger. It was just barely big enough to encircle the single finger. “Oh,” he said. “That’s why.” He sat down on the couch and lay Cleo in his lap. She looked up at him curiously before her face split into a wide grin. “No wonder Mom wanted a daughter.” Cleo babbled at him and he chuckled softly. “You’re right. Maybe Luther was jealous too. I won’t be like him,” he swore again. “I’m not going to abandon Erin. Or you either.”

Aaron loved his sister more than life itself. If Josten made her happy, then so be it. If Cleo was the one she showered with love, then fine. But a small part of him wasn’t fine. Erin didn’t love him. His sister, his own flesh and blood, didn’t love him. It left a hole in his heart, one that even Katelyn couldn’t fill. Aaron hadn’t known what he’d have to give up to Katelyn but what he did was far worse than anything he could have imagined. There weren’t enough words in any language to express the anguish that washed over Aaron when Erin had picked Ania over him. He’d used Josten as bait for Erin to break her promise but a small part of him had wanted her to refuse. He’d wanted Erin to pick him over her. He’d wanted Erin to do the unthinkable and tell him that she loved him more than she wanted Ania. He’d wanted her to wrap her arms around him and hold him close.

He wanted her to hold him the way she held him now as she carried him to the front door. Josten was already unlocking the door. She turned at the sound of Erin’s footsteps. A bright smile of her own burst out across her face.

“Shut up, Ania,” Erin swore.

“Haven’t said a thing,” Josten replied. She pushed open the door and let Erin pass. “Erin?” she asked as she followed them into the house. “Why do you only do these things when Aaron’s drunk?” To anyone else, it may have seemed like an innocent question. To Erin though? Getting anything from her was like pulling teeth. For half a second, Aaron didn’t expect her to answer. Then he remembered that it was Josten asking not him. A pang of bitterness pierced his heart as he felt his sister’s chest swell at the intake of a breath.

“Because he’s nice to me,” she said. Aaron’s head jerked up but Erin wasn’t paying attention. She’d stopped walking. Her eyes were trained on a spot on the wall. “After I killed Tilda, he stopped talking to me entirely. Aaron loved Tilda, even if she didn’t deserve to be loved, and I took her away. I hate when you say you’re fine because that’s what I told myself whenever he ignored me. I told myself that I didn’t care. I did. Aaron’s favorite color is navy blue. Half of my closet is navy blue. Aaron’s favorite song is Young Blood. It’s on every one of my cassette tapes in the car. I hate cool ranch chips but I buy three bags every time I go to the store because Aaron loves them. Tilda didn’t deserve Aaron’s love but he loved her anyway. I don’t deserve Aaron’s love either. I-” A shaky breath rattled through Erin. “I just wanted him to love me too.”

“I do,” Aaron blurted out. Erin snapped out of her trance at the sound of his voice.

“You’re not drunk,” she said. Her voice was dangerously quiet. Her eyes were dark and stony but this time Aaron didn’t look away. The longer he stared, the more apparent it was to him that they weren’t empty. Staring into them, he saw something flickering deep down inside.

The truth about cameras is that they don’t steal your soul. They show you yours. No matter how perfect a picture may seem to others when a person looked too hard at their own, they saw what lurked beneath. It wasn’t that Erin had their mother’s eyes. It was that she had his. When Aaron looked too hard at his sister’s eyes, he saw too much of himself. He saw the sad, empty creature he’d become. He saw the defeated, lonely creature he still was. Most people hailed Aaron as ‘the normal twin’, the Dr. Jekyll to her Mr. Hyde. No one realized how wrong they were.

Erin was a fatalist at heart. To her, everything, every single thing, was predetermined. If the world believed her to be a monster, then that was what she’d be. She played her part and lived exactly the way people thought she would. It was all an act though. Behind every one of Erin’s monstrous acts, was a lonely little girl trying her hardest not to get left behind again.

Unlike his sister, Aaron didn’t believe in fate. Every man made his own way in life, no matter the circumstances he faced to make it there. If that was true, then didn’t that make Aaron responsible for all the things that he’d done? Growing up, Aaron had done many things he wasn’t proud of. It didn’t matter who suffered so long as it wasn’t Aaron. If there was no fate, then wasn’t Aaron responsible for all the people he’d hurt? It wasn’t Erin who was a monster. It was him. When Aaron looked too hard at his sister’s eyes, he was forced to face the monster he had become and it scared him.

Aaron felt the support go out from under him and he hit the floor, hard. Erin spun on her heel and shoved past Josten. Neither of them moved until they heard the door to her bedroom slam shut.

“I told you so,” Josten whispered. There were tears shining in her eyes. “It’s over, isn’t it?” she asked herself.

“What do you mean?” Aaron asked.

“I promised her I wouldn’t tell anyone about this and now… she’ll never trust me again.” Her voice broke.

“Ania-”

“Don’t, Aaron.” She turned on her heel and marched out of the house, nearly knocking over Kevin who was dragging Nicky in.

“What the hell have you done to her?” Kevin snarled. Just the sight of a teary-eyed Josten was enough to sober him up. He abandoned Nicky and closed the space between himself and Aaron in the blink of an eye. Balling his fist in Aaron’s shirt, he shoved him against the wall. “I’m not asking again, Aaron.” This is what a brother should be, Aaron thought.

When Ania first arrived at Palmetto a year ago, she and Kevin were always at odds. No matter what she did, it was never enough for him. But that was because he knew she could be better. Nicky had made the mistake of mocking her once and Kevin and slammed him against the wall just as he held Aaron now. Erin intervened quickly, breaking them apart with a poisonous smile and a flash of steel but one thing remained: Kevin Day, a man afraid of his own shadow, hadn’t hesitated to square up the second someone dissed Ania. And that was before he’d found out who she really was.

Kevin and Ania weren’t bound by blood the way the twins were. They’d chosen each other. Ania had chosen to follow Kevin out to Palmetto and Kevin had chosen to have her back. But hadn’t the twins done the same thing? Erin chose to move to Columbia and Aaron had chosen to protect her. Why had they failed where Kevin and Ania had succeeded? The two of them were just as broken as the twins. In fact, they were worse. Ania had lived her life in the shadows, jumping ship the second anyone started to get too close. Kevin had lived his life in the limelight, denied anything even resembling a friend.

Even without knowing her, Kevin had looked upon the wretched creature that had been Ania Josten and wanted to offer her a future. He had wanted to offer her something to live for. Kevin would never be able to love Ania the way she needed to be but he wanted to give her the chance at a life where she could find someone who could.

And he did. Kevin brought Ania to Palmetto and gave her a reason to keep going. He brought her to Erin, someone who could care for her the way she needed to be cared for. But what had Aaron done for his sister? He’d pushed her away the second things got hard. He’d denied her of the love he’d promised himself he’d give. He’d made her lonely.

“How?” he croaked. “How do you do it?” Kevin frowned and his grip loosened.

“How what?” he asked.

“How do you always know what Ania needs?” Aaron had seen the way Ania ran to Kevin the second things fell apart. Too many times, he’d come back to the dorms to find her breaking down in Kevin’s arms. Each time he’d watched Kevin swaddle her shaking form in blankets and offer her things: a cassette player with only one tape, a bowl of vanilla ice cream drowning in chocolate syrup, his laptop with an exy game already loaded.

During Erin’s time at Easthaven, Aaron had found himself craving the smell of cigarette smoke. He wasn’t a smoker but the smell reminded him of Erin. One night, he finally caved and dragged himself to the corner store. He returned with a pack of cigarettes and another pint of strawberry ice cream. Every time Aaron passed by the corner store, he picked one up. He never ate a single one, though. Opening the fridge door, he realized there wasn’t any space left. Every inch of his fridge was filled with pints of strawberry ice cream.

It should be empty. The fridge should be empty. His breath came in short, ragged gasps. Aaron didn’t know when the tears started or how long he’d stayed knelt in front of the open fridge, only that Ania kicked it closed before sitting down on top of it.

“There isn’t enough strawberry ice cream in the world to fix her,” she said. She handed him a tissue box and waited for him to blow his nose.

“Then what will?’ he asked.

“That’s for you to figure out,” Ania said before unplugging the fridge. That was what Kevin said before he let go of Aaron entirely. With that, he left Aaron alone in the kitchen so he could lug Nicky up to his own room.

Aaron sat heavily in one of the dining room chairs, picking at the table mats. It was early the next morning when he finally decided what to do. Actually, he didn’t decide. He just kind of stood up and started for the stairs. He didn’t even remember taking a single step. One moment he was at the kitchen table, the next he was standing in front of Erin’s door. He reached a hand out, tracing the letters on the door. The memory hit Aaron like a train.

It had been a week after Erin had arrived in Columbia. Aaron’s name was already on the door and he had wanted to add hers to it too. Ever since he’d been old enough, Aaron had been working part-time just to keep himself and Tilda fed. In the months before Erin was set to come home, he’d picked up extra shifts to scrounge up the money he needed. With it, it went to the crafts store in the rich part of town. He picked out the four letters he needed and bought the highest quality paints he could find. On Friday, after practice, he’d broken into their mother’s liquor cabinet and grabbed a bottle of Jack Daniels. Downing a swig, he found the courage to present his haul to Erin. It took some coaxing but he managed to convince her to sit on the floor with him on a pile of newspapers. Together the two of them painted the wooden letters black. Once they were dry, Aaron watched as his sister painted constellations onto them.

“What’s that one?” he asked.

“Gemini,” she replied.

“Astrology,” Aaron said as he crinkled his nose in disgust. Erin glanced at him, her lips just barely curling up.

“Have you ever heard the story of Pollux and Castor?” she asked.

“No,” he replied.

“They were two brothers, twins, from Greek Mythology. They did everything together,” Erin said softly. “The two of them couldn’t live without each other. So, when Castor lay dying, Pollux called out to his father for help. Zeus saw his son’s pain and offered him a way to save his brother. Zeus offered Pollux the ability to share his immortality with his brother. Doing so would mean that neither of them could live normal lives again. They would no longer live here on Earth and they’d only have each other as company. Pollux agreed immediately. To him, his brother was more important than anything else in the world. So, Zeus turned the brothers into stars. Together, the two of them live side by side in the sky.”

“Wouldn’t you get lonely if you had only one person to talk to?” Aaron asked.

“Not if it was you,” Erin replied. With that, she picked up the letters and moved them to the desk beneath the window. The two of them climbed into their respective beds and fell asleep.

Aaron took a deep breath and knocked softly at his sister’s door. He stood there, his heart hammering in his chest. What if she didn’t answer? Aaron took a deep breath. He’d just try again later. Ania was right. What they’d done tonight had betrayed a great deal of Erin’s trust in them. If she didn’t answer, it was because he’d hurt her, just like he always did when he was sober. Aaron leaned his forehead against the door. “I’m sorry, Eri,” he whispered. Just then the door opened and Aaron toppled forward again. Erin neatly sidestepped his falling form but caught him with an outstretched arm. “Eri-” he began. He stopped short, realizing he didn’t know what to say.

Erin gave up waiting for him. She righted him and stepped back. Aaron took it as an invitation and entered her room. Aaron had never been inside his sister’s room. In the pale glow of the first rays of sunlight, he saw the dead roses suspended from her ceiling. A thousand photos covered the surface of the mirror. Upon closer inspection, he found that they were pictures of the Monsters. There was one of Nicky smiling brighter than the sun as Erik pressed a kiss to his cheek. There was one of Aaron shoving Matt, the two of them smiling. There was one of Wymack with his head resting on Abby’s shoulder. There was one of Bee dressed up as a bumblebee. There were a lot of photos of Ania. One of them had been kissed with black lipstick. Erin was the only Fox that owned black lipstick. As Aaron inspected them he was aware of Erin at his back.

“There aren’t any with us in it,” he said as he dragged his fingers over them.

“Yes, there is.” Erin wrapped her hand around his wrist and guided it to one all the way in the bottom corner. Its sides were crinkled from being taken out and replaced too many times. There was a fold down the center from when it was been folded in half, probably placed between the folds of a book.

It was a photo featuring a pair of babies. Both of them had wispy blonde hair, most of which had been tucked beneath a little beanie. They were dressed in matching white onesies patterned with little sharks. They were two perfect, identical little babies. Erin laced her fingers through Aaron’s and he suddenly saw it. The two babies were holding hands too. Eyes closed, unable to even see one another, they had taken hold of each other’s hands. Babies didn’t have much strength, but the two of them were clinging to one another like their lives depended on it.

“Eri-” he croaked.

“Yes or no?” she asked.

“Yes,” he said. Erin turned him to face her. She wrapped an arm around him and drew him close. Tentatively, he wrapped his own arms around her. “Erin?” he asked softly. She pulled back just enough to look at him. “I’m sorry I wasn’t better.”

“You were the best,” she said. “You still are.” For once, Erin’s eyes weren’t empty or angry. Instead, they were hard. Resolute. If anyone else had said it, Aaron wouldn’t have believed it. Erin wasn’t a liar. Every word she said, she meant.

“I can be better,” he offered. He watched as she worked her jaw, searching for what to say.

“I think I can be, too,” she said. Time seemed to stop. Aaron watched as the smallest of smiles tinged his sister’s lips. The rays of the rising sun filtered through Erin’s thick curtains, illuminating the fading freckles that danced across her face, forming constellations of their own. It turned her pale hair, bound in a messy bun atop her head, into a halo of pure gold. Erin might have been dressed as an angel last night, but she looked more like one now than she had then.

#just a pipe dream #fem!andreil asks #erin minyard #ania josten #aaron minyard hc #aaron micheal minyard #aaron minyard #wholesome twinyards #fem!andreil #the monsters #kevin day #the foxhole court au #the foxhole court #all for the game au #all for the game #all for the gay

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sae-bae-ran · 6 years ago

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Hi!~ Happy Halloween! This request isn't exactly themed to Halloween, but how would Jumin, Saeyoung, Saeran, Vanderwood and Zen react to an MC who has supernatural powers/gifts? Maybe you could make up what kind of powers she has? I feel like it'd be an interesting topic... or I'm just a sucker for fantasy AUs/scenarios... Hope you're having a fantastic day!

Oh, it’s okay! I only used Halloween as an excuse to open my requests, lol. I’ve wanted to do that for a while. ^^ Thanks for your request, sweetie!

Also, a month ago I wrote a scenario about Saeran and an MC who can heal plants and accelerate their growth. Since that is also a supernatural power, you might be interested in reading that post, too -> click click 🌸!

Masterlist 📜 || Ko-fi ☕

Zen, Jumin, Saeyoung, Saeran and Vanderwood reacting to an MC who has supernatural powers

Hyun Ryu // Zen : MC with the power to see the future/precognition

The moment you hear about Zen’s prophetic dreams, you decide to tell him you’re not unfamiliar with the supernatural, either. Especially when it comes to seeing the future, as it is something you’ve learned to do at will, just by focusing on a person’s energy.

The problem is, when it comes to his own supernatural gifts, undeveloped, but still powerful, he’s not quite convinced yet that his is a supernatural gift and not a spoopy coincidence.

Despite this, he’s quick to embrace this part of you.

Not just that. By accepting your extraordinary side, he starts accepting his as well. The prophetic dreams become something he’s proud of, a gift and a responsibility he’s more than willing to take. It’s always better when there’s someone out there who truly understands you and Zen’s incredibly grateful this someone for him is you.

Loves the fact that you both have pretty similar supernatural powers. In his mind, this is yet another proof that you two were meant to be together.

If you decide to share your secret with the other RFA members, Zen will often clog the chat with long paragraphs with boasts about how you two are a match made in heaven. Literally. He’s just that happy.

“Hey, babe. You think my ability to heal up quickly has something to do with the supernatural?” Super excited to be a part of this magical world, all because you’re there with him, too.

Jumin : MC with telekinesis

If there’s anything that fascinates Jumin more than Elizabeth’s kitty antics and the cute faces you make without realizing it, it’s the supernatural.

So once you gather the courage to tell him you’ve been blessed with an extraordinary gift, he’s beside himself with pure excitement.

If you thought he loved just watching you go around and do your everyday chores, wait until the moment he observes with childlike glee and curiosity every movement you make while practicing telekinesis. The extra attention might be embarrassing at first, but it’s all because he loves you too much and wants to be a part of your life, be it mundane or extraordinary.

Absolutely adores it when you use telekinesis to pass him the salt at dinner or to do something else that is a cute and small domestic gesture.

Feels immense happiness and pride that the woman he loves has such powers, but will never boast about it. In fact, he’ll keep quiet about it, afraid that bad people might come after you if word of your supernatural abilities got out.

Because of this, he never takes pictures of you while you’re using your powers, even though he really wants to. Rest assured, though. If someone hacked his phone and saw them, he’s willing to live with you on a distant island until things calm down and people forget about what they’ve seen.

You can’t find it in yourself to tell him that doesn’t matter. Even if he did take such pictures and they were leaked online, all people would see would be a blur of colors barely resembling a person. But the dork is too cute trying to protect you, so playing along benefits all.

707 // Luciel Choi // Saeyoung Choi : MC who is a shapeshifter

When you shapeshift into Elly, then back to your normal form, Saeyoung’s first reaction is to drop the Phd Pepper he’s holding, his lips slowly parting as he tries to comprehend what just happened.

Shocked. Happy and super curious, but shocked. And once his mind slows down, he feels worry seeping into his bones.

Because of his job as an agent and his crappy childhood, Saeyoung is well aware of the atrocities people are capable of. If someone found out about what you can do, or even worse, if someone from the agency found out about you, you’d be sentenced to a life of experiments on your body that would leave you scarred, both physically and mentally.

Falls on his knees, forehead on the floor as he begs you to never ever use your powers again.

Takes a lot of time for you to convince him that you’ve managed to survive on your own so far, so going forward, especially when you have people like him to protect, love, and support you, shouldn’t be a problem.

Still, he makes you promise you’d be extra careful.

On very rare occasions, he asks you to partially shapeshift into a cat - just the ears. There’s something about playing with your kitty ears that calms him down immensely. If he doesn’t drift off to sleep snuggled close to you, he’ll often pretend he’s a cat, too.

“Sevenny can be a cute kitty, too, nyan ~ See, nyan? ~ Seven-nyan deserves a good belly rub, nyan ~”

Ray // Unknown // Saeran : MC who can understand animals’ emotions and control their behavior/animal empathy and manipulation

Saeran’s always known you are special.

It’s in the way you smile, the way you tuck your hair behind your ear, and the way you carry yourself. He’s known this all along. This supernatural gift you possess, it’s just another layer of uniqueness that sets you apart from everyone else.

He’s in awe every time he wakes up to find you sitting on the front porch, surrounded by many and different animals that seem to be as smitten with you as he is.

“I guess I’m gonna marry a princess. And not just any princess - my future wife is a Disney princess.”

Likes to tease you about it in the most caring way possible. Often calls you “Snow White”, “Belle”, or simply “my princess”. Makes you wonder if he realizes just how incredibly adorable he is by doing that.

Doesn’t mind getting a pet, or two, or maybe even five. With your supernatural gift, it’s inevitable.

Your home is bound to become a safe place for strays, so that at least saves you time you’d otherwise spend looking for a pet that has a higher chance of finding a forever home anyway. Strays are something else.

He might not be able to communicate or understand animals as much as you do, but Saeran loves them nonetheless. It’s his small and unconventional family, but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Vanderwood : MC who can teleport to any place in the world she’s seen before, even if just on a picture

Silence.

…

“Bubbles, have you gone mad? Did you hit your head or something?”

Vanderwood’s initial reaction is that of disbelief. Or more like, denial.

He’s seen some secret documents at his job. He knows what’s up. People’s genes mutate and occasionally, that gives them supernatural powers. Extraordinary gifts that should be celebrated, but are instead hidden away in dark laboratories, never to be seen by the world.

No, he’s not gonna let that happen to you.

In a fit of anger, you grab him by the arm and teleport you both to a secluded place in an unknown country. Might be the waves crashing against the cliff you’re standing atop, might be the sun rays warming you up as the sun rises, but Vanderwood calms down.

He understands he can’t make the decision for you. He can’t hide you away in some faraway cottage at the end of the world. All he can do is sit down and have a serious conversation with you.

Lets you know he’ll be there for you no matter what happens. Even if it means laying down his own life, he’ll protect you.

Never comes to this, though. With time you realize there’s only one place you truly want to be, and that’s by his side. Everything else you wanna see in this world, well, you sure as hell can get there by the various means of transportation that already exist. And with Vanderwood by your side, the hours spent traveling are time well spent.

#mystic messenger #mysme #saeyoung choi #saeran choi #jumin han #vanderwood #zen #hyun ryu #mysme headcanons #luciel choi #707 #ray #unknown #Anonymous

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boutsofbanter · 7 years ago

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The Contemplation of a Ghost

A/N: Or as it's titled in my docs, "Patton what did Logan tell you smh." This was supposed to be a short little thing for the Spoopy Sides AU by @beeswaxbuffoon but I got carried away and it's been like a month since I started writing this (life gets in the way too much, I do not appreciate it).

~*~*~*~*

Occasionally, Roman will get…flashes. Sudden images of his own death that force themselves into his head and refuse to leave him alone.

Of course, he remembers how he died. How could he not? It was so recent, his favorite place on earth burned to the ground in a fiery inferno with himself still inside…But it all happened so, so quickly. He’s not even sure how it started. It could have been an outlet with one too many plugs, a reckless stage crew member smoking, faulty wiring in the lights or sound equipment, any number of things. All he knows is that once the curtains had caught fire, the entire stage burst into flames.

Roman remembers screaming, running, the sounds of his friends and coworkers panicking as they left the theater by any means necessary. He had been…trapped? Maybe? Did he…go back for something? Was he hurt somehow and unable to leave? It’s all a blur, a blur of lights, stage makeup, and heatheatyelloworangeredfirefirefireburningburningpainhelppainburning.

Then nothing.

The flashes give him a glimpse into his own untimely demise, and for that he is grateful, but they also have an…unfortunate side effect.

As a ghost, Roman is prone to wailing. Ghosts typically begin to wail, or sometimes sing hauntingly, when they contemplate their death or become particularly depressed. (At least, he thinks that’s what happens. He hasn’t met any other ghosts, but based on what Logan’s told him and the others, what he does is completely normal and even healthy for him).

(Being not-human is weird).

But he digresses. When he first died and was still tied to the ashes of the theater, he was caught in a near-constant state of wailing. There were times when he’d sing songs from productions they’d held at that theater, but he would often become too upset to carry the tune, and he’d dissolve into cries again. Fortunately, once the others found him, bless their souls (if they even have souls…he should ask Logan), he found reasons to embrace his afterlife and move on from his own death. He’s been incredibly happy with Logan, Patton, and Virgil keeping him company and welcoming him into their family of supernatural spirits.

But…he can’t completely forget how he ended up here. There are still times (more times than he would care to admit) when he needs to cry and wallow in his own misery. The flashes bring it on more than anything. When he’s confronted with impossible-to-ignore images of burning wood, flaming fabric, and blistering flesh…he can’t keep himself from crying out in pain and suffering. It hurts his heart, knowing that it bothers the others. Especially Patton. He still remembers the first time he wailed once he moved in with them…

~*~*~*~*

This is wonderful! I don’t have to be alone anymore!

Logan, Patton, and Virgil. My new roommates. A vampire, a werewolf, and a shoddily-put-together lab experiment. Hah, if only my friends could see me now, I’m living the story!

My friends…my friends…I can never see them again…

I left the only place that ties me to them, the last place I saw them, the last place I ever performed, where I rehearsed for hours upon hours, sang endlessly, acted ceaselessly…

It’s all over now…

“Roman? Roman! Are you—”

“Stop! Do not touch him, do not even contemplate engaging in conversation with him!”

Patton? Logan?

“Why!? We can’t just…just leave him like that!”

“Apologies, Patton…you cannot comfort him right now. He needs to do this, it’s healthy for ghosts who died in a similar manner to him…”

Healthy? How is this awful feeling healthy? Oh god, I’m dead, I died, it burnt to rubble and ruins…

“How can that possibly be good for him?”

“It is hard to explain, Patton. Just know that it would be far worse if you were to intervene. Roman must…‘ride it out,’ so to speak.”

“Okay…”

~*~*~*~*

After that, Logan had explained the benefits of ghostly wailing in regards to the ghost’s specific instance of death, and none of the others had tried anything when they heard him wail. Roman’s grateful, of course, he only wishes he didn’t have to hurt them so. And he’ll admit that it isn’t exactly a trip to Disneyland for him either.

Wailing is…well, it’s odd. Once Roman is in the midst of a fit, his mind filters out everything else. Sometimes voices will pierce the veil (ohmygod, he has to remember that one for Virgil later), but he can’t see or hear much throughout. His tear ducts are magically transformed into a bottomless well, it’s a bit ridiculous. The tears will cover his vision and float off the surface of his skin, little ghosts of their own. His stage makeup bleeds down his face, dripping in mascara flakes and eyeliner smudges, leaving his cheeks permanently tattooed with black trails. And his voice: it becomes several times louder than normal, and the wail builds in waves upon waves of sadness, remorse, and longing. It echoes in his head, and while he can hear the depressing thoughts chase each other through his mind, they’re only able to escape and become physical in the form of wordless cries.

Thank goodness for that, he wouldn’t want the others to hear them; Roman himself doesn’t particularly care for them.

It is cleansing, though. He doesn’t see it in the moment (he can’t see anything in the moment), but after his sobs die out and his tears dissipate, he feels so light and empty. In a good way. He guesses Logan knows what he’s talking about (duh, he’s been around for hundreds and hundreds of years, Roman would be surprised if he wasn’t bursting at the seams with knowledge).

Internal-monologuing aside (Virgil would call him a nerd if he’d heard any of that), Roman is currently curled up in an armchair by the window, watching the rain streak the glass. It’s a soothing storm, which he’s more than grateful for. Thunder and lightning make Patton anxious sometimes and no one in this house is happy when Patton is sad.

Roman hums quietly, something vaguely familiar, but he can’t for the life (well, after-life) of him place a name on it. His thoughts branch out randomly. He briefly contemplates floating outside to sing dramatically in the rain, but decides against it for fear of being cliche. He wonders if Virgil and Patton have fallen asleep, they usually curl up and watch movies when it rains, occasionally passing out on the floor or the couch. He mentally notes that they need to pick up more Crofters the next time they go out, he noticed that they only had one jar left earlier and he doesn’t want Logan to run out and have to resort to blood.

Sighing contentedly, Roman decides to go check on Patton and Virgil. He shifts into a more transparent form and sinks through the floor, far too lazy to walk. He finds them curled up on the rug, Patton’s wolf form wrapped around Virgil, who has two handfuls of Patton-fur and his face buried in Patton’s undoubtedly warm neck. Roman chuckles, shaking his head fondly at the pair. Logan must have come by before, there’s a blanket draped over them and the popcorn bowl was moved to the table to avoid being knocked over.

For someone supposedly so stoic, Logan definitely has his soft side.

Roman’s eyes drift to the TV, still on but with the volume significantly lowered. It looks like Patton and Virgil were watching movies on cable instead of on the DVD player, there’s a commercial about some sort of cleaning product playing. Roman grabs the remote and is about to shut off the TV when the scheduled program comes back on and piques his interest. It’s some sort of crime show, he’s not sure which one, but the main character has just been informed of a new death in a series of related crimes.

By a serial arsonist. Of course, what else?

His hand very suddenly becomes less corporeal and the remote clatters to the ground, thankfully not waking either of the sleeping supernaturals nearby. He wouldn’t want them to see him shaking with his eyes locked on the screen. The protagonist arrives at the scene of the murder, a burned-out apartment building. It was supposed to be abandoned, but apparently some homeless man was hiding inside and was trapped when the arsonist set the place ablaze. The body appeared, shoved in a bodybag but still visible. Its face was burned beyond recognition, skin black and bones charred where there was no skin to cover them. Roman’s stomach sunk and he felt like puking, though he couldn’t possibly have anything in his body to expel.

That’s what my body must’ve looked like.

He wouldn’t know, his bag was shut when he appeared in the rubble of the theater.

The I-need-to-throw-up feeling from before surges up, causing Roman to double over and choke on air. He’s full-ghost, he shouldn’t be able to feel much of anything at all, but his skin burns and his heart aches and his stomach rolls and he feels like dying all over again.

A wail rapidly builds up in his throat and he slaps both hands over his mouth to stop the sound from escaping. There’s movement in his peripheral vision and Roman glances over to see Patton shifting beneath Virgil’s limp form, an almost distressed look on his dog-like face. He huffs and then slips into a deeper sleep once again, and Roman lets out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. He can’t wail here, they’ll hear it and startle awake and Virgil will be scared and Patton will be worried and he won’t be able to reassure them and they won’t be able to do anything but watch and listen.

Roman simply cannot do that to them.

Whimpers and sobs try to force their way between his fingers, but he stays firm as he frantically rushes out of the living room and into the basement, praying that it will be far enough away for them not to hear. He’d go to his room (sound-proofed for this specific reason), but he can’t force himself to float up. His body merely sinks into the spacious room below the house, typically used for storage and therefore empty of anything comforting, which further worsens his mood.

Trying to physically seal his mouth shut doesn’t work for long, it never does, and the wail that Roman has suppressed breaks free with vicious revenge for being stifled. Roman cries in earnest, everything hurting so damn much that he can hardly stand it. His body curls in on itself, hands clenched over his heart to keep it from shattering under the weight of how utterly hopeless and lonely he feels.

His vision is quickly compromised by the tears that stream from his eyes and he can’t seem to remember where he is or who he is or what’s happening to him, he only registers suffering.

Then the thoughts make an appearance.

I died like that, just like him, I burned and burned and burned, turned black and completely unrecognisable.

My friends had to see that, my parents had to see that, everyone had to see that.

Or maybe no one did. Maybe I’m just like the theater, disgusting and abandoned, unlovable and meant to be lonely forever. They probably don’t care to visit my grave, wherever it is, if they even decided to bury my husk of a body.

God, I’m so lonely, I’m all alone, and I’ll always be alone. I’m stuck here for eternity, utterly helpless and forever alone…

No one loves me.

I don’t deserve love, I’m just a ghost, a spirit that was never meant to go on existing…

Muffled sounds, they’re drowned out by the voices in his head.

Weak, pathetic, selfish, vain, worthlessworthlessworthless

“...man! Please! Snap ou…”

This isn’t real, I’m not real…

Something wraps around his body, constricting him, trapping him, setting his burning skin on fire all over again. Oh, it hurts, it hurts so so bad.

He’s suddenly slammed into reality. Everything becomes much too clear much too fast, where it was all vague and distant before. Cries turn to screams as the walls of the basement close in around him, trapping him even more than the thing twisted around his body. The boxes shake and the things stacked on storage shelves along the walls clatter to the ground, only adding to the chaos.

The thing holding him captive grips tighter and he trembles because he can feel it with such fucking clarity it’s maddening. He shouldn’t feel anything, he’s dead, he doesn’t have anything left to feel!

It shushes him and he can’t take it, he can’t take a single shred of calm in the center of all the mayhem.

“This isn’t real! I’m not real you’re not real none of this is real I’m not real I’m not I’m not I’m nothing and I don’t exist!”

He shrieks louder than he ever has and his voice echoes, rattling everything around him.

The thing’s touch finally goes away and he screams in horror, seeing himself standing there. Only it isn’t him, it’s his body, his charred and broken body, hardly anything left of the person he once was. He can’t believe that the thing in front of him was ever human, that it was ever a part of the real world, that he was ever a part of the real world.

It jumps away from him, appearing to be frightened, and runs away to the hell that it came from.

He wants to be relieved, but he only feels painpainpainpain.

~*~*~*~*

It’s been days.

Days since Roman had been calmly musing about his state of being and his death before casually floating downstairs to check on his housemates. Days since he’d caught sight of the screen playing some unknown show. Days since he’d seen an undoubtedly fake but seemingly so realistic body, one that was burned to death, trapped in a building much like he himself had been. Days since he’d gone to the basement to wail. Days since he’d been interrupted. Days since he’d felt the worst pain since his actual death.

It was Patton who found him, of course it was. Patton, sweet and innocent and kind, who knew that he wasn’t supposed to touch Roman, but who couldn’t resist reaching out to comfort, to heal.

Roman didn’t blame him, not in the slightest. Patton only wanted to help, how could Roman possibly be angry with him? For caring about him? For trying to help? He’d be a heartless fool to be mad. But Patton didn’t see it that way.

Although, he supposes he doesn’t know how Patton sees it, since he hasn’t seen Patton in almost a week. After realizing what he’d done, Patton hasn’t been able to face Roman at all. He’s sure that Roman hates him, which couldn’t be further from the truth, but no reassurances from Virgil or Logan have changed his mind. Roman keeps trying to corner the stupid werewolf, but he’s staying decidedly out of the way.

Roman just wants to talk to him.

“Still moping, I see.”

“Virgil,” Roman acknowledges. Said being flops down beside him on the couch, sighing as he does so. Roman lays his head on Virgil’s shoulder and he feels a hand rest on his knee in kind.

“You know he doesn’t mean to hurt you, right?” Virgil says softly.

“Of course I know that, Franken-emo. I still feel terrible about it all, though. I just wish he’d talk to me so I could tell him that it’s alright,” Roman laments.

“Hey, I get it. But don’t beat yourself up about him feeling bad. You’ve tried to talk to him and he won’t let you. I love Pat more than anything, but even I can see that he’s being dumb about this. As if you would ever hate him, as if anyone would ever hate him,” Virgil scoffs.

Roman agrees wholeheartedly. Patton’s like a precious puppy, literally, it’d be insane to dislike him.

“Maybe Logan will convince him to actually listen to you. He came ranting into my room last night about how ridiculous and illogical Patton is being about this whole situation. All, ‘what does Patton think, that he can just avoid him forever? They live in the same house! Also, it’s Patton, honestly, he must have lost his human processing skills, there’s only copious amounts of fluff in his brain!’ and blah blah blah.” Virgil rolls his eyes after his admittedly decent impersonation of their resident vampire, and Roman laughs.

“Maybe,” Roman smiles up at Virgil, “Thanks, Virge.”

“Don’t thank me yet, we don’t know if Patton is actually gonna use those big dog ears for something,” Virgil warns, but still squeezes Roman’s knee comfortingly.

Quiet settles in the living room and Roman is relishing the calm of the moment when a door slams open upstairs.

Virgil jumps and Roman can feel his companion trembling from the sudden loud noise. They hear voices, Logan’s and Patton’s, one sounding frustrated and demanding, the other meek and somewhat-protesting. Specific words are not to be heard, but Roman hears something along the lines of Logan forcing Patton out of his room. Then there’s two sets of footsteps---or well, one set of feet and one set of paws---coming down the stairs. Roman perks up hopefully when he sees Patton’s furry legs and tail dragging reluctantly along. He may not want to be here, but at least he is.

The pair comes into full view, Logan’s hand gently but insistently gripping Patton’s forearm. Patton refuses to meet the eyes of anyone in the room, and his ears are angled low in shame and distress, but he’s finally here and maybe Roman can actually get a word in this time.

“Virgil, would you mind accompanying me upstairs? The stitches on your left arm look as if they could use reinforcing and I left my sewing kit in my room,” Logan says lightly.

Virgil’s stitches are fine, Roman’s pretty sure Logan just redid them two days ago, but he nods in understanding and gets up. “Sure, Lo.”

The two head upstairs after Logan sends an encouraging look Roman’s way and a somewhat threatening one Patton’s way, similar to the look a mother sends her misbehaving child when they disobey an order. Roman suppresses a giggle, knowing that he’ll only have one shot at speaking with Patton about this.

Said lycanthrope is hunched over, hugging his arms close to his body with his tail curled around his feet. He looks as though he’s prepared to be yelled at, not wanting to hear it but knowing that he deserves it. Roman softens at the sight of him and sighs.

“Patton, would you come sit with me please?” he asks, gesturing to the cushions beside him.

Reluctant shuffling brings Patton closer to Roman than he’s been in nearly a week, and the way he sits on the couch looks hesitant and tense, as if he’s prepared to bolt the moment he does something wrong. Roman takes a deep breath and weighs his words carefully, “Hey padre, I’ve…really missed seeing your fluffy hide around the house.”

Patton whimpers, “I don’t know why you would, after what happened. Roman, I-I’m so sorry. I’m so so SO sorry, I really didn’t mean to hurt you or make it worse, I just wanted to help, you looked so miserable crying by yourself in the basement…” he shakes his head sadly, “But that’s no excuse, is it? Logan already explained why we’re not supposed to touch you or interrupt you when you’re wailing or in a trance, I knew I wasn’t supposed to, but I did it anyways. I’m…I’m really sorry, kiddo, and I understand why you’re mad. You have every right to be, to h-hate me, and if you want to yell at me I won’t object.”

He looks like a kicked puppy and Roman could almost cry.

“Patton, will you look at me?”

It takes several tense moments, but Patton’s head eventually turns up and his big sad eyes meet Roman’s. He looks scared and regretful at first, then confused when he doesn’t find anger in Roman’s own.

“I’m not mad, Patton. Of course I’m not, what a ridiculous idea. You just wanted to help me, you were trying to be comforting and supportive, how could I possibly be angry with you for that?” Roman’s tone is soft and reassuring. He doesn’t want Patton to think he hates him, that just hurts too much.

“B-but I made it so much more painful for you! Everything started…shaking and it felt so small and dark in that basement. And your face…“ Patton trails off, shuddering at the memory.

“My face? What about it?” He knows his makeup runs and looks positively horrendous (an insult to his skills, honestly) when he’s in such a state, but Patton’s seen that before.

“It was…I don’t know how to describe it. It moved like your bottom half in ghost form, and you, you didn’t have eyes, or a mouth or anything. It was just…vaguely the shape of your head and gaping black holes,” Patton finishes, looking haunted at the memory.

Roman blinks. “Well, I guess the smudged makeup is preferable to that.”

“You have a promising career as a horror actor, Ro,” Patton jokes half-heartedly, trying to lighten the mood.

Roman chuckles, “I suppose I do.” He focuses on the issue at hand again, needing Patton to understand that it’s alright. “Patton, I promise I’m truly not mad. The me when I’m in a trance like that, it’s not really my rational self. I overreacted because I couldn’t think straight.” He was tempted to add that he never thinks straight, but figured it wouldn’t be appropriate when he’s trying to convince Patton that he’s serious.

“You looked so scared when you saw me, though,” Patton points out, sounding self-deprecating, which really doesn’t suit him. Patton deserves to be happy and healthy and most of all feeling loved at all times.

“It wasn’t you that I saw.”

He does the confused-dog-head-tilt thing that melts Roman’s heart. “What did you see?”

A memory comes to the front of his mind and he quickly shoves it back. “Not important. Just know that what scared me wasn’t you, I had no idea you were even there, trying to help. I swear to you, Patton, I love you very much and I could never in a million years be angry at you for anything, especially when you’re trying to be comforting.”

Roman holds his arms open expectantly, hoping he finally got through to him. Patton’s eyes widen and he whines before practically jumping into Roman’s arms. He’s chanting apologies and Roman hugs him tightly, shushing him all the while. There’s absolutely nothing to forgive.

Logan and Virgil returned after a while, and Logan lightly slapped Patton upside the head for being a stubborn idiot. Virgil yelled at Logan for hitting Patton, Roman laughed, and Patton pulled them all into a group hug. Roman couldn’t have stopped smiling if he tried, and he was more grateful than ever that they’d found him and welcomed him into their home.

#sanders sides #roman sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #spoopy sides AU #beeswaxbuffoon #my fics

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ahnsael · 7 years ago

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At noon (PDT) I have a reblog set up in the queue. I’m writing this a month before you’re seeing it. I queued it for Halloween because it fits, but...I got VERY uneasy when reading it. Some was a little...TOO familiar.

It starts with:

Irish people; The faeries aren’t real

Irish people; No fucking way will I go in that faerie ring

When you see that, there are two things I should tell you. First, it’s a LONG post. Because while the text above is the entire post from OP, people have...added to it. Added a LOT to it. If you don’t want to read a long post, or don’t want to read tales about...not ghosts, necessarily, but...things...then you may want to get your scrolling finger handy when you see that.

I’m writing this on September 28th because...it may not be a good idea for me to read that post again if I later remember that I wanted to post a warning about it and want to remind myself what I’m warning you about. Not that the post will leave my memory. It won’t. It hit too close to forget, and I’m hoping it doesn’t set off a long wave of nightmares like some of my past personal experiences have.

I know there are things out there that I cannot explain other than to say “ghosts” or perhaps “demons” or “spirits” or what have you. I don’t think any of those words are quite right for the post coming later.

I’ve had experiences, which those of you who have known me for a while have probably read about on here. If not, there’s a brief recap of a couple of my experiences a couple years ago at https://ahnsael.tumblr.com/post/138202074744/so-what-are-the-things-that-have-made-you-believe. I probably told them better on the old blog, before I started over with this one, but...it’ll give the general idea. And there are more that I don’t have in that post. I don’t remember if I’ve told them or not. After reading the post that will be here three hours after this one, I don’t feel up to telling them.

I’m going to have a hard enough time sleeping today (today being a little over a month ago, from the time you read this) as it is.

Because the other thing about the long post that will post later today: to me, it’s scary as hell. Because it doesn’t come across as your standard “2 spoopy” silly ghost story. It comes off as a genuine collection of experiences with things that are perhaps better left un-messed with. I’ve messed with things in the past, and one night it almost cost me my sanity (for all I know, it actually DID and everything since has been a fever dream).

I’m not saying there’s a zero% chance that I would do it again. Some days I feel braver than others. But right now, I’m kinda freaked out.

And it doesn’t help that I live in an area of old abandoned barns, 100+year-old buildings (one of which I work in), and stories of this type brewing under the surface, but never quite spoken out loud. I want to research what may be here, but I’m also a little worried about what I may find out. Perhaps by the time this posts, I’ll have learned something.

#ghost #queue ball corner pocket

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storytaeme · 8 years ago

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blood love – day 15

spoopy kinktober drabbles – NC17

➵ Pairing: Kim Namjoon x Kim Taehyung

➵ Prompt: Incest (Stepbrothers) ↪ content: anal sex, taboo relationship, brief daddy kink

➵ Word Count: 2,788 words

Taehyung had been seventeen when his mother had remarried. It had been a long time coming. After having been widowed for so long, she had met a man who Taehyung had deemed to be equally as lovely as she was—deserving, in other words. They had gotten along well, so well that a year into their relationship his soon-to-be father quickly invited them to move into his bigger house to fit them all.

That had made him a little hesitant—not because of their relationship no, Taehyung loved how smitten they were with each other, but it was because of his new stepbrother. One whom he had never met before and only heard stories of. Kim Namjoon seemed more like a myth than anything, partly because his academics were through the roof while Taehyung barely got by and that he was unbelievably capable of everything if what his stepfather said was true.

He shifted uncomfortably by the doorway, holding tightly onto his duffle bag as his mother rang the doorbell. Seungcheol was a dashing man, that was no doubt, but as he greeted them early in the morning dressed in silk robes and the most brilliant smile on his face, Taehyung understood why his mother had been so enamored.

“Good morning, darling,” he smiled and kissed both her cheeks, taking her bag on instinct. “Good morning, Taehyung, how are you doing?”

“G-good, sir,” he stuttered nervously, bowing.

Seungcheol laughed, “No need for formalities, Taehyung. After all, your mother and I are to be wed soon, you can call me dad.”

Taehyung nodded obediently, shyly.

“Come on in, I was just preparing breakfast in the kitchen and Namjoon should be up shortly. Then you both can meet him,” Seungcheol’s eyes seemed to sparkle in excitement, which bubbled up another nervous round of butterflies in Taehyung’s stomach. He led them both inside the place, a humble abode that had a generous amount of space to squeeze in a family. After setting their bags in the living room, they settled in the dining room as Seungcheol had practically prepared a feast for them. “Here you go, Taehyung,” he smiled, setting a bowl down in front of him. The scent invaded his senses almost immediately, the savory aroma making his mouth water.

“Thank you so much, this is my favorite,” Taehyung beamed gratefully at him.

“I know,” he winked, “made it just for you this morning.” Taehyung hid his blush and moved to dip his spoon into the steaming broth, taking a cautious sip. The flavor was absolutely delightful.

When they fell into light chatter about their daily lives, Seungcheol asking Taehyung and his mother questions about how the packing went and whether they needed anything else, footsteps dropped the room into a hush. “Morning.” The voice was silky smooth, sweet, and had Taehyung tingling to his very bones.

A tall man, taller than Taehyung, stepped into the room and walked from behind Taehyung to the seat across from him. He bowed politely at his father and then at Taehyung’s mother, before directing his attention to Taehyung. “Namjoon, ah, good timing. Please, meet our new family.”

Namjoon was a polite man, a very charming man who had his mother smiling and blushing in an instant. He turned to Taehyung then as Seungcheol and his mother moved to the kitchen to prepare more dishes. “You must be my new brother. Taehyung, right? I’m Namjoon.”

Taehyung stood up and bent down, “Good morning, it’s nice to meet you, Namjoon-hyung.”

Namjoon’s laugh was similar to Seungcheol’s the kind that had his heart calming and beating a little louder at the same time. “Please, I’m going to be your brother, just relax. It’s nice to meet you too, Taehyung.”

Breakfast went by relatively uneventfully, filled with pure introduction with his mother asking plenty of questions to Namjoon and Taehyung eyeing the father and son combination curiously. The resemblance was uncanny. Seungcheol’s dimples seemed to have carry down to Namjoon, his brilliant smile and his undeniable charms as well. They really were alike.

“Taehyung,” his mother nudged him. Taehyung drew out of his thoughts and realized that he was staring right at Seungcheol who looked amused by his sudden stupor.

“Sorry, what were you saying?”

“Namjoon was asking you about your extracurriculars,” his mother cleared her throat, quirking an eyebrow in silent question if he was okay.

He offered her a reassuring smile before turning to his stepbrother. “I’m in student council, treasurer. I also picked up volunteering at the local daycare.”

“What an honorable man,” Seungcheol noted, nodding in approval, as Taehyung flushed again at the attention.

“Yes,” Namjoon said slowly, “I’m sure you have a great variety of interests.” There was something in his tone Taehyung couldn’t decipher, but he chose to brush that aside, instead focusing on the conversation.

When Seungcheol and his mother went out to buy a few necessities to help them settle in, Namjoon was left with Taehyung as he unpacked in his new bedroom. “Sorry about this, hyung,” Taehyung said sheepishly, “you’re stuck helping me on your day off.”

Namjoon chuckled, waving it off as he carried another one of Taehyung’s boxes into the room. “It’s really no big deal, Taehyung. Look, we’re family now, if you ever need anything—anything at all—don’t hesitate to ask okay.” Taehyung tended to be a little bit oblivious but his brother’s words seemed to process as nothing more than a sweet sentiment from a sibling, the twinkle in the older boy’s eye indicating nothing of his true intentions.

As the months went on and the seasons changed, the family grew closer and closer. Namjoon lived at home but spent the majority of his time in university and at his internship. Meanwhile, Taehyung was picking up the last of his high school years and graduating with honors before planning out what would be best years of his life. The family was close, they got along well. Taehyung loved Seungcheol’s addition to his family, loved how supportive and kind the man was. Namjoon was the same, always looking out for Taehyung and always seemed genuinely curious about his life and interests.

However, Taehyung was still a boy—a boy with a lot of needs, which was why he was grateful for the comfort of his individual room. He fired up his browser and pulled up his site, punching in familiar key words that he always used. Of course, he was at least smart enough to use headphones to listen into the slick sounds and the filthy moans from the video. With his eyes glued to the screen, he pulled his pants down and cock out.

He had been too deep into the lustful haze, too caught up in the voices in the video to realize his door cracking open behind him. He had his fingers around his cock, pulling and stroking with the cheap lube he had picked up from the store. It wasn’t until he heard the door slam shut that he turned around, on his desk hair, bare waist down. He let out a small squeak, quickly covering himself with his hands as he looked at Namjoon who eyed him with a raised eyebrow. The video was still playing, but the only thing he could hear was the thundering of his heartbeat.

“H-hyung,” he breathed, hands scrambling for his pants.

Namjoon approached him and placed the scissors he had borrowed from his beloved stepbrother days ago on his desk. He was silent as Taehyung struggled with his sweats. “Just wanted to return these.”

“R-right,” Taehyung stuttered, wondering why in the fucking world Namjoon wasn’t laughing at him or running screaming for the hills. It was then he realized that the video he had looked up was still on the screen—a man fucking into another man. His eyes widened as his hand reached to close the tab.

Taehyung was gay—undeniably fucking gay. But no one knew, not yet. He was planning to keep it on the down low until university when he was surrounded by open-minded millennial. His mother didn’t know, Seungcheol didn’t know, and Namjoon sure as hell didn’t know. Until then at least.

“Interesting choice,” Namjoon noted, his voice sounding more subdued and curious.

The younger cleared his throat, looking everywhere except Namjoon.

“You like boys, Taehyung?”

Taehyung hiccuped, looking at Namjoon warily. “N-no, I was just—”

Namjoon gave him with a stern glare that shut him up. “Don’t lie to me, Taehyung. I don’t like people lying to me.”

He bit on his bottom lip before nodding in embarrassment, keeping his head ducked as he squeezed his eyes shut, readying himself for any sort of repercussion. However, he opened his eyes when he heard the soft thud, seeing Namjoon’s knees on the floor before feeling his fingers on his chin tipping his head up.

“Why are you so scared, Taehyung-ah?”

“Y-you’re not mad?”

Namjoon looked humored. “Why would I be mad? I had an inkling of an idea, but you just confirmed it.”

“How—what—wait—”

“You have a noticeable infatuation with our father.”

Taehyung felt his heart drop to the ground. Being gay was one thing, but having a teensy crush on his stepfather was another. The man was nice and generous, he didn’t look at Taehyung as if he was a mere child but rather a son he was proud of even if they weren’t blood-related. Rather than saying it was love, maybe Namjoon had labeled it rather better. Infatuation.

“Noticeable?” He sounded feeble because his knees had gotten week. If Namjoon had noticed then maybe—

“Don’t worry,” Namjoon said, lips quirking up at the ends, “I’m a little more perceptive than others. I highly doubt father noticed anything, neither does your mother.”

Taehyung let out a breath he was holding, leaning back against the seat. His hand felt clammy and gross and his dick was still hard in his pants and twitching. He wanted to get off so badly, it was even worse now that Namjoon—attractive, beautiful Namjoon—was in front of him. “Okay, and you won’t—you won’t tell mom right?”

“No, love, of course not,” Namjoon whispered, brushing his bangs away from his face. “This will be our secret.”

“Thank you, hyung,” Taehyung breathed a sigh of relief. “Sorry you had to catch me like this.”

Namjoon huffed a laugh, “Don’t be embarrassed. And remember, Taehyung, I’m always here to help if you ever need anything.” It took him a while, but the meaning behind Namjoon’s words finally dawned on him, sinking into his soul and lighting his body on fire.

“Wait, are you saying—”

“Only if you want to, Taehyung,” Namjoon smiled. Gentle, sweet. “I’m not pressuring you into anything.”

Taehyung’s teeth caught his bottom lip as he fiddled with his finger in his lap. “I-isn’t that weird though? We’re brothers.”

“Stepbrothers,” the elder corrected.

Taehyung still looked hesitant, wondering if this was really okay. He did want to, but the fear of getting found by their parents made him a little doubtful.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to, Taehyung,” Namjoon assured him, “just a suggestion. I’ll see you later, yeah?”

His hand caught Namjoon’s absentmindedly, holding onto his fingers tightly as he stared up at the standing man with big eyes. “Wait, I’m—I want to—I mean, I want to try. I just—I haven’t really done anything so I don’t know much and oh my god, I don’t want to mess up and—”

Namjoon’s hand came down to stroke his face as he leaned down to level his face with his brother’s. “Do you trust me?”

Namjoon was kind and honest. He knew the elder would never lay a hand on him without his consent. Taehyung looked up at him, resolved with his decision. “Yes.”

“Good,” he smiled back, “we’re going to have so much fun, Taehyungie.”

The knock on the door brought him out of his daze, fear licking up his skin like the flames of hell coming after him. “Taehyung? Are you in there?” His father’s voice sounded through the barrier. “Dinner’s almost ready, just to let you know.”

Taehyung—Taehyung was rather occupied. Namjoon slid into him again, harder this time, hard enough to jolt him forward against his desk. He squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed his moan, because fuck, he could feel everything inside of him. Namjoon’s thick length was buried deep inside of him, his body quaking with the fullness.

Namjoon leaned over him, breath ghosting the shell of his ear. “Answer him, Taehyungie. Don’t want to keep father waiting.”

His lips quivered as Namjoon bit his earlobe, nibbling hard enough to have him holding back a pleasured squeak. He tried to compose his voice as best he could but it was proving difficult when Namjoon was grinding against him. "Yeah, I'll be right down!"

There was a silence and the two of them expected their father to disappear then, to leave them be so Namjoon could go back to splitting his stepbrother's ass in two. Taehyung felt so nice and snug around him, his ass fit perfectly around his cock. The first time they did it, Taehyung had wept and sobbed into his pillow over how painfully good it was. By then, Taehyung was already taking dick like a champ. Taehyung muffled his voice into his arm as Namjoon rolled his hips just right to rub the tip of his cock against his prostate, the sensitive spot delighting in the friction.

"Hey, Taehyung," his dad called again and Taehyung froze, and so did Namjoon. All three seemed to be stuck in a standstill for a few moments in which Taehyung's voice had disappeared altogether. However, Namjoon broke the trance by fucking up into Taehyung again, harder and faster this time. There was a thump from when Taehyung bumped against the table, but hopefully it had been small enough to be ignored. "You know if anything's going on with you, you can talk to me right?"

Holy shit. Holy shit. Taehyung closed his eyes and clamped his lips shut so he wouldn't groan over how incredible Namjoon felt pushing up with his hips to reach deep inside Taehyung, how good it felt when Namjoon's fingers circled his cock and began to stroke.

"You've been a little distant lately and I just want you to know that," his father added again.

Taehyung wanted to throw himself out a window. He could barely process two of his father's words when Namjoon's movements were making a jumbled mess of his mind. "Answer him, Taehyung," Namjoon growled, "answer daddy."

His ass clenched instinctively with Namjoon's words. A gasp choking in his throat. "Yeah, I got it." Taehyung called back.

"Anything at all, Taehyung," his father pressed again. His words were an echo of Namjoon's just months ago when he had propositioned Taehyung and the thought sent him down another spiral of lust as Namjoon chuckled knowingly behind him.

"Yep, got it, dad."

That provoked Namjoon to tug on his hair, jerking his head back as he fucked Taehyung forward with his hips. "You call him daddy too, baby?" Taehyung whimpered. "Who's your daddy, baby boy?"

"Y-you are," Taehyung gasped.

"That's right, I am," Namjoon enunciated every word with a thrust of his hips. His cock filled tight in Taehyung's ass. "Daddy fucks you good, doesn't he, Tae?"

"The best," the younger bit down on his tongue to stop himself from moaning aloud again. The last thing he needed was his stepfather realizing that his own son was fucking his stepson.

The next response came from their father again. A sigh. "Okay, Taehyung, I'll see you downstairs." With that, the following footsteps seemed to be an indication for Namjoon to break all his restraint as he began to pound into the boy, skin slapping on skin echoing in the empty room. Taehyung wailed quietly into his hands, his ass felt raw and numb at the same time, oversensitive to every single thrust.

"That's a good boy," Namjoon grunted, "taking daddy's cock like a good little slut."

Taehyung babbled something incoherent, he wasn't sure what he said but his words must've satisfied Namjoon because the boy was telling him to come, come around his cock and all over the table, knowing well that his baby boy would make such a mess with his filthy come. Taehyung was always the compliant one—and so he came and he came hard, a white pool forming on the floor from where he dripped. He leaned his forehead against the desk, breaths weighing heavy in his chest as he tried to keep his wobbling knees up.

Namjoon's arm swooped around him to bolster his weight as his own breaths kissed Taehyung's damp skin. "Proud of you, baby," he whispered.

Taehyung smiled, "Thank you, Daddy."

#bts #namjoon #taehyung #vmon #bts smut #kinktober17 #bts scenarios #bts fanfic

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jo-the-schmo · 8 years ago

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Traveling...Ch.1

Masterlist (you’re gonna need this if you want anything to make sense)

A/N: Hello, everyone! I finally finished the first chapter of the sister series to Breaking! This first chapter may be a bit rocky because I only need it to establish what’s about to happen but I can’t wait to keep working on this! I’ll try to have chapters out as soon as possible and I hope you guys like this!

Before you read: Remember, this story takes place after the end on the main story AND after the Alex end. A lot of stuff is going to rely on knowledge of the first series so if you are knew to this, I do encourage you to reading the entirety of Breaking first! It is long but it will be essential to understand what’s happening. Thank you so much!

Wordcount: 1315

Warnings: Cursing, that’s all for now anyway!

Tags: (I will be tagging everyone from the original series, tell me if you no longer want to be tagged! I will also be tagging some of the new people who were asked to be tagged!) @midnightokieriete @renae-writes @deltablue202 @literally-melonkitty @meunicorn @favouritefighting-frenchman @demigod-runner-who-potter @gum-and-chips @sweaterkitty-fluff @littlemissshortcakes @pinkyiger7 @unprofessional-inhumanbeing @fandom-panda-221 @hummusandchips @spoopy-piineapple @ashwolfcub @myself-and-the-madman @sweet-fate @superwholockbooknerd526 @frozengal2013 @itsmikayblr @sarmar29 @arya-durin-51 @phantastic-fandoms @hoshihime98 @shinigamired @martapetrovic @robotic-space @tayahqr @asprinkleofmermaids @satellitesuga @rose-coloured-nihilism @okie-dokie-artichokeme @pandartist @apandawithcookies @kitcatgirl2016

Traveling Back

“Miss Titania, you act as if you have seen a ghost, perhaps my friend and I may help you? What is a lady doing so far out here?” Alexander looked at you with a cautious expression. What do I do? What do I say? I can’t give him the same story, it doesn’t fit! I feel so drained…Think Y/N, think! Keep it simple, keep your story straight.

“I..I ran away...” Nice save, me. Way to use personal experience.

“You ran away? Why on Earth would you do such a thing?” John asked.

“I had to! I... didn’t belong there.” Subconscious, could you maybe stop making me say these things?! John and Alex both stared at you quizzically, you continued. “I was a servant, until I left. I-I’m sorry I’m not explaining myself very well, I’m just…” What the hell is wrong with me? Why is the room spinning so much? What the hell am I supposed to do? How did I even get here? I don’t know what to say! I can’t breathe, I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t! You were hyperventilating, you couldn’t figure out why. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, images and voices started to flash around your mind. A man with dark skin, wearing blue, busting through a door you recognized. He shouts, “HERCULES MULLIGAN!” with a huge smile on his face. You sucked in a huge gulp of air and opened your eyes. Your vision began to stabilize itself, your heart rate calming down a bit. That’s when you took notice of the fact that you were laying down, arms wrapped around you, two faces looking down at you.

“Miss Titania, are you well? You started shaking uncontrollably!” John exclaimed.

“I have seen Myles do the very same thing, my dear John. Perhaps it is more common than what we first perceived.” What the hell was that? It was like...a VHS being sped up...or rewound? That’s when you realized something, you could see it in your head, as if it were a memory. You remembered the children, Alex’s children, being excited about the man in the door. You remembered the man picking you up and running around the room. You remembered it, but you knew it didn’t happen. You don’t remember seeing that man until just now.

“Forgive me...this happens sometimes.” Alex helped you to your feet.

“No, no, please forgive us. It was rude for us to try and pry, but we only wish to help.” John explained.

“Um, this is going to sound really odd but...where are we?” You asked. Maybe I can figure out what year it is.

“We moved out of Valley Forge a few days ago.” Alex answered. Either Pennsylvania or New Jersey. It’s clearly not winter…so it must be 1778? I went back twenty years? That explains why Alex is so young, why John is...alive, and what all these tents are. Living quarters for the soldiers. I’m in the Revolutionary War. I need to figure out what I’m doing, they’re gonna ask me to leave because women and wars, ugh right? I can’t exactly leave them, there was never really a surplus supply of ways to survive as a woman until World War I, again ugh, right? Also, there’s no telling what my existence has changed to this timeline, I could’ve changed the entire course of how his war ends...Alex could die because I showed up...I need to stay and watch after him, make sure everything stays on track. At least, that was the excuse you gave yourself.

“Miss, perhaps you would like us to escort you to town? This is no place f-“John started.

“No! You can’t send me away! I can help!” Why did I say that?!

“How so?” Alex questioned.

“I…I can tend to wounds, a nurse. I am a supporter of the revolution, I would like to offer my assistance.” Alex stared at you suspiciously.

“I’m sorry, but we already have plenty of nurses, I believe it-“ Fuck! He doesn’t trust me, say something! Anything!

“I have information!”

“You have what?” John inquired.

“I have…information…I can tell you anything you need to know about the battles ahead.” Anything, tell them anything they need, gain their trust. John and Alex looked at each other, as if they were having a silent conversation. They both nodded and turned to you.

“Prove to us that you have information of value.” Alex requested.

“You are currently moving out northwest, correct?”

“How did…”

“Right now, troops are moving out to stall the British forces from moving up to New York City. They evacuated Philadelphia, while we the American’s persistently harass them to slow their pace. Has General Lee already been sent out ahead or is that still being strategized?” John ‘s eyes fixed on you.

“Alexander…we have to take her to the General…now!” John insisted, although Alex didn’t seem to be listening.

“Who’s the General in charge of the group moving Northwest?” He asked. He was testing you, your eyes slanted.

“Clinton, General Clinton.” You answered, he looked oddly impressed. He nodded, a small smirk on his face as he motioned for you to follow.

“This way.” The three of you made your way out of the tent, untying the string around your neck to take off your cloak and folding it into your arms. Men were filing in from all directions, laughing and celebrating. They were all wearing the same clothes as John and Alex, they were soldiers, coming back to base after successfully cutting down the enemy’s course. Whenever they passed by John and Alex, they’d stare at you with confused eyes. They didn’t recognize me, outside women were not allowed on the base. You were too focused on the stares for a while and didn’t realize the two men leading you were talking.

“When do you think he’ll head back out to England?”

“A few more months at the earliest, he needs to lie low for a bit longer until he can go back. He still has to wait for Cato.” Cato? Why does…that sound so familiar?

“Aren’t I always the topic of conversation?” Another voice interjected, you turned to where you heard it come from. It was the man you saw in that ‘memory’ You could feel the cells in your brain pulsate. His bright smile lowered slightly when he saw you, but it was still pleasant. “Hamilton, you didn’t tell me we had a new nurse coming in!” He approached you and held out his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, my name is-“

“Hercules Mulligan.” You weren’t sure why you said that.

“Haha, it seems that my reputation proceeds me!” He chuckled, his charisma was very apparent, quite charming, you couldn’t help but smile back at him. Alex rolled his eyes.

“Mulligan, please, this is not the time!” He said with slight annoyance.

“Oh! That reminds me! The General wants to see you to discuss the next plan of attack.” Herc pointed over his shoulder towards one of the larger tents. Bingo, he must be in there! You gathered up the skirt of your dress in your hands and began to full on sprint to the tent. I need to talk to him first, try to get to him before the opinions of the other two. I need him to trust me. Alex and John called out to you, you could hear them running after you. But they weren’t fast enough.

You skirted to a halt, the mud on the ground pushing into the straight lines of your heels digging into the Earth. You pushed back the fabric of the tent and practically threw yourself into the illuminated interior.

“Mr. General! My name is Titania Taylor, and I would like to offer my self to the efforts of the revolution, sir!”

I am determined, the world won’t know what hit her!

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dumpsterfireblog · 8 years ago

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JENN’S *FUN* TOP 10: WEEK OF 7/24

A shit-ton of k-pop artists have had comebacks recently, which is simultaneously exciting and very overwhelming. I can really only handle a couple at a time (because I’m old and frail and overstimulation will likely cause a heart attack and subsequent death), so I purposely staggered listening to them. The ones that I have heard so far haven’t disappointed, even if there’s a stylist or two out there that need to be crucified asap. In any case, that makes this particular week’s top tracks a little stacked towards k-pop. Complaints can be sent straight here.

1. Red Flavor (빨간 맛) - Red Velvet

Is it too early to say that Red Velvet saved summer? It’s pretty rare for me to love a girl group song at first listen (it usually takes a few repetitions for the full Earworm Effect to sink in). Red Flavor somehow managed to dig itself so far back into my head that I would hear Irene’s voice (“ 빨간 맛... 궁금해 Honey~”) constantly throughout the day, sometimes even when I was listening to other songs. That’s right, Red Flavor bullied its way onto the #1 spot of this list. I love how summery and upbeat this track is, not to mention how goddamn catchy it is. SM taking me on a wild LSD trip with the music video was just the cherry on the cake. The song definitely has major Happiness vibes, but I hated Happiness. I don’t know. I’m fickle.

2. Palette - IU

Basically a sequel to IU’s 23 (which, until now, was indisputably my favorite song from her), Palette came as a pleasant surprise when I stumbled across it in May. I’m a big fan of the relaxed, yet self-assured mood of the track... enough to have listened to it multiple times before every job interview I’ve gone to in the past two months. Her breathy vocals might not be the pinnacle of technique, but it sure sounds good to me. GD also ‘softens’ his rap to match the song, and it all fits quite naturally. The only problem I can find is that IU claims that she’s 25, even though she looks the same as when she was 15. Immortal vampire or not, I like the direction that IU is going with her music and I hope she manages to escape the ‘idol’ sphere and make it as an artist.

3. Really Really - WINNER

I’ll be honest, I know next to nothing about WINNER except that they were picked from a YG survival show and that both 센치해 and BABY BABY have gotten stuck in my head for extended periods of time. Really Really surpasses both of those songs by a long shot. What can I say? It’s a catchy song. A house track that’s chill enough that I can listen to it on repeat without feeling exhausted, yet interesting enough that it never gets boring is a gem to find. Plus the “널 좋아해” - pause - chorus drop make my ears happy every time I hear it.

4. Get Used to It - Ricky Montgomery

I wasn’t exactly sure which Ricky Montgomery song to put on this list, because I’ve been listening to This December, Get Used to It, and Last Night on a continuous loop. Get Used to It represents everything I like about Ricky Montgomery. It’s bouncy, quirky, and catchy as hell. It’s also just light enough to be a song I can listen to in the background without even realizing that I’m humming along.

5. The Eve (전야)- EXO

EXO finally made a comeback this week with The War, and everyone is in a craze about the cocoa puffs. After a full listen of the album, I would actually say that I prefer The Eve over their actual title track. I much prefer the chill side of EXO ( 으르렁 is still my favorite song from them) and this pleased my little ears more than the aggressively hype Ko Ko Bop. It also manages to be a little moody when it gets to the chorus, which was a nice twist. From the pop rock intro to the strangely enjoyable sax sample (to D.O. saying “What’s the situation”... not that I’ve been replaying that recently), The Eve is the true standout track on their album to me. Kai’s hair was fixed for the live performance of this, so that automatically gives the song a point over the rest.

6. Dinosaur - AKMU

I’ve been rooting for AKMU ever since their audition on Kpop Star, and I can only really think of one song that I’ve ever disliked from them since (and even then, it was because it was too generic but not particularly bad.) When I saw the teasers for their comeback, I didn’t know what to think. Was it a spoopy song? Their pictures made it look like they were in a horror movie or something. Even with that in mind, Dinosaur still caught me off guard. The song is a departure from the siblings’ usual heavily instrumental/acoustic sound and a foray into the magical world of EDM. But AKMU can’t just do EDM the way everyone else does it. Unlike some of the other songs in this genre, Dinosaur doesn’t overload you with unnecessary synth sounds and keeps itself simple, light, and refreshing. It’s fitting for both the summertime and the song’s theme of childhood dreams and innocence. Suhyun’s clear voice cuts through the music and it lifts your mood just listening to it. All in all, AKMU continues making good music, which isn’t really a surprise.

7. 4 O’Clock - RM & V

I completely missed this song when it was released during BTS Festa (Bless me Jinsus, for I have sinned) and finally got around to listening to it once I caught up. 4 O’Clock (or ‘Your Poem’) is nothing short of beautiful. There are so many good things about this song: V singing in his natural baritone (AMAZING), the absolute poetry that are the lyrics, Vocal Monster making a late appearance... the only downside is that this is meant for a different season. My favorite part has to be when V imitates the call of a mourning dove while singing “Where are you” because it gets me sentimental as shit. This is definitely something that fits the mood for staring contemplatively out of your window at 4AM, feeling soppy about nothing.

8. Let’s Get Breakfast - Walter Mitty and his Makeshift Orchestra

This song has always been a treat to listen to, and it’s just a pity that it’s so short. Let’s Get Breakfast is a sweet and fluffy song that is also incredibly addicting. Its simplicity is also a strong point, with just a voice and acoustic guitar helping the song keep its authenticity and charm. I know literally nothing about this band or any other song that they’ve made, but I’ve never felt like I needed to know more... only because this song can keep be occupied enough to not need anything else.

9. As if it’s Your Last (마지막처럼) - BLACKPINK

Another comeback that’s a summer bop. I heard a lot of people complaining that this wasn’t as hard-hitting as they expected, but YG did announce beforehand that this was going to be the first ‘PINK’ song that the group released. The chorus of 마지막처럼 sounds more like old-school kpop than anything else, and that’s not a bad thing. Lisa gets another iconic rap segment to add to her resume, and Jennie makes sure that you know she can sing. This isn’t my favorite song from BLACKPINK, but it’s fun and easy to listen to. I found myself putting it on whenever I wanted something to fill the silence.

10. Leave Out All the Rest - Linkin Park

When I heard that Chester Bennington committed suicide, I didn’t really know what to do but go back and listen to all of the Linkin Park songs that I had grown up with. They were all painfully relevant, but Leave Out All the Rest was the one that I ended up listening to the most. In a way it was me mourning a part of my childhood, so it only makes sense that this makes it on the list.

#jenn #top ten list

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cosmosogler · 8 years ago

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starting late because i was watching a video essay. worth it. well, “late” as in 11:40 instead of like 11:30.

today i...? i woke up on time basically. i don’t remember what i was dreaming about any more. maybe i could start writing that down. i could.

i think i goofed off online for a while and then went downstairs because i desired salsa. dad had left to pick up mother from the car repair shop. i KNOW i did something in that time span but i really don’t remember at all.

just as i was grabbing the chips they returned with donuts. so i had... salsa and a chocolate donut. i’m cool.

while i was nibbling on my brunch i went through all the mysterious discs i had found both in my closet and on my shelves. none of them were labeled so i had to put each one into mom’s computer to figure out what it was, and then label it and put it in a case instead of laying around in envelopes. target’s old photo service is gone and the viewing software isn’t compatible with newer computers so i thought i had lost all those images, but i found a workaround (after i had emailed customer service... of course). i also labeled all the leftover photo envelopes. that saved me a lot of time later when i didn’t have the chair or desk.

when i finished with that i made plans to get some supplies with mother around 5. then i tidied up my to-do jar and cleaned the bathroom entirely. like it’s sparkling. the disinfectant made me lightheaded though so i had to spray and then leave the fan on for 5 minutes while i did other things outside the bathroom, and then wipe, and then spray again... i also fixed up the cleaning supply closet a little bit. i need dad’s help to fix the sink i think. not sure how to proceed with that. it’s not clogged, but it’s draining slow. i don’t know what my sister does with that sink but there is constantly hair all over it.

after that i still felt restless and agitated so i organized my entire bookmarks bar. i kind of just dumped everything into what looked like the right folder... i’m going to have to go through each folder individually later and check for broken links, or things i can group together so that one folder isn’t overwhelmingly large. and i’ll definitely need to start actually looking in the folders when i’m bored and need something to do. ha ha...

i downloaded a couple new songs from oc remix and updated my ipod as well. and fixed some of my albums that were acting weird on the menu. half of one of them was marked as a compilation and the other half was not.

then it was just after 5 so i bullied mom out of the house. we went to michaels and i got some rubber bands and photo albums. mom got some replacement stuff for her kitchen shelves. when she actually does the replacements i’ll be able to finish that project.

i also convinced her to stop for noodles for dinner. i called home to see what dad and my brother wanted... dad ended up snapping at my brother super loud. it was loud on the phone and i knew he was in a different room. my brother ended the conversation very quickly after that when previously he had been a little more interested in the menu. i know the feel.

so when i got home i shoveled pasta in my mouth (and managed to eat it all!!) and took my albums upstairs. i was pleased to find that i had bought exactly as many albums as i had envelopes, when at the store i had had to guess from memory. unfortunately some of the envelopes were so sparse that i could put two sets in one album. so i have two albums left over in case i come across any more loose pictures.

and i read for a while. i shouldn’t have... my eyes REALLY hurt and i was grinding my teeth super hard again today. it’s hard to want to use my reading glasses when i use the computer... it feels like it’s just out of the range i would hold a book at so the glasses aren’t quite what i need. but it would probably be better than just using my eyes vanilla style.

i am again avoiding doing emotional work by keeping myself super busy with projects. at least my living space looks super nice. but i am running out of useful ways to procrastinate.

i noticed today when i put on a previously tight shirt that it was... not tight at all. it fits me like it used to in high school. and i might actually need a belt for these shorts. it’s weird. i took a quick look in the mirror and i do look more like how i look in my head. very bizarre. i kind of hope i don’t gain the weight back after the surgery. i don’t see why i would, but, i am nervous about it anyway. i’m not thin by any measure ‘cause i got a pudding bod, but the weight loss since my condition started is very noticeable by now. it hasn’t really leveled off either.

i try not to think about my weight/appearance too much because i think if i thought about it every day i would never be satisfied with myself. at least, i would consciously be not satisfied and it would bother me. so i just don’t look at myself much. but a lot of people who know me have been all, “you look good!” and “you’ve really lost weight, huh?” and it’s like... ok, thanks for thinking i look “good,” as in “better,” because i wasn’t good before apparently. but also, thanks for not paying attention to the fact that i don’t FEEL good at all. that’s why it’s a disease or disorder. like cool, i’m glad that my horrible gallbladder malfunction makes it easier for you to look at me. i haven’t been able to eat regular meals in six months, but you know, losing weight is more important than a functional digestive system. i wish there was a comment i could make that would like, slap them on the wrist verbally when they pull out the “you look good”s.

i dunno, my outfit or hair are things i have more control over. and i understand telling someone that you like they way they look, or pointing out a beautiful tree so that others can also appreciate its beauty. it’s not comments on appearance that are inherently... insensitive. but if your family member has had a chronic illness for the better part of a year and the best you can pull out is “at least you lost weight!”, then maybe something is wrong?

ehhh. i also organized my jewelry into a single case (and earring frog). and a little bag for all my hair clips. i will be ready for any seasonal theme in grad school now. i even found a spoopy skeleton necklace and cannibalized an old chain to fix the exo necklace i bought at the concert with my sister. the trinket is fairly lowkey so i might be able to convince myself to wear it.

ok, it is hitting 12:20. i’ve been writing for a while. i don’t really want to go to bed... i am profoundly bored. well, not bored, i’ve been keeping busy enough and doing things when i have the energy. i guess a better thing to put my finger on would be “profoundly lonely.” i basically just dump everything i have to say on asher. i have trouble leaving him alone for more than a few hours. my sister’s always at work or school (both are full time) and my brother... i’ve found that he doesn’t really have a lot to say to me. it’s really hard to talk to him unless i’ve got some cousins around to diffract some of the attention. joking around with him has been a little fraught since those holocaust “jokes” last year. and if we’re not joking around, we don’t really have a solid language to communicate with. i can only make so many puns.

and my best puns are only when i am possessed by the spirit of terrible, terrible jokes. otherwise they get kinda forced even when i have a large vocabulary to work with. but the spirit is on and off, i can’t do that on command.

it’s my bedtime. it’s hard to sleep when you’re... (lonely) (depressed) (restless) (sore) too tired to sleep.

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jo-the-schmo · 8 years ago

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Breaking... Ch.12

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11

A/N: This chapter took way too long because I wasn’t planning for it but it’s here now so let’s go y’all! I’ll get back to the main plot next chapter I swear!

Wordcount: 3609

Warnings: Blood, slut shaming, taunting, cursing

Tags!!: @iamnotthrowingawaymyshit @renae-writes @deltablue202 @literally-melonkitty @meunicorn @favouritefighting-frenchman @demi-godamit @gum-and-chips @sweaterkitty-fluff @pinkyiger7 @littlemissshortcakes@msageofenlightenment @unprofessional-inhumanbeing @fandom-panda-221@hummusandchips @spoopy-piineapple @ashwolfcub @myself-and-the-madman @sweet-fate @superwholockbooknerd526 @frozengal2013 @lmaodedhaha @itsmikayblr @sarmar29 @arya-durin-77 @phantastic-fandoms @hoshihime98 If anyone else would like to be tagged just shoot me an ask saying so! ^-^

Breaking Trust

You felt the impact send waves through your skull, they reverberated through your brain. Bouncing off the bone. You were falling past the ground, it seemed like the ground faded from under you. Varying shades of grey were around you and sticking out like jagged stone; but as it faded out to white you felt the familiar wrapping of silk around your body. Just as you saw the end of the gleaming fabric, one of the pieces wrapped itself around your leg and dangled you above your point of exit. You stared numbly into the light, you couldn’t see anything beyond it but you could hear something faint. “Miss, I’m going to need you to step back and leave the room! The doctor needs room to work.” It was a woman, she sounded older and frustrated. “No! Please, I need to be here with her! Y/N! Please, wake up!” Another woman said, she seemed much younger than the first and her ton was frantic. Her voice was familiar. “Damn it all! She’s drifting off! Miss L/N, do not fall back asleep!” An older male voice called. You tried to fight the silk and reach out towards the voices but it was no use. The silk raised you up as you struggled and flung you the way you fell. You flew through the air, past the white, past the rocks and into the light you came from.

Your eyes shot open as you gasped for air. You were laying on some kind of couch and you felt the warmth and light from a fire nearby.

“Well, at least you’re finally up.” A female voice said curtly. You looked around to see a woman standing by a door. Her clothes were similar to yours, only her bodice was orange and had longer sleeves. “Honestly, you’re lucky to be alive at all. If Mr. Burr had not seen your horse, you would certainly be dead.” Mr. Burr? Her voice was cold, her hair, skin and eyes all matched that tone. Icy.

“Where am I?” You asked as your frantically sat up. She chuckled at your panic.

“I shall inform Mr. Burr of your current status. Wait here.” She ordered you and walked out of the room. What the hell happened? The last thing I remember… You touched the left side of your face and winced. You felt some sort of bandage along your left temple and although you couldn’t see it, you could feel how bruised your face was. There were footsteps coming toward the door so you stood up, you still felt a bit dizzy but you quickly steady yourself. In walked in a familiar man, dark skin, wearing a deep purple and a pleasant smile.

“I see that you are awake. What was your name? Titania, was it?” He asked.

“M-Mr. Burr, sir! Um, that’s what I am called yes?” Am I lying? He nodded and sensed your confusion about the situation.

“I heard a commotion outside my door at sun rise and saw a horse with gear standing on my lawn. I recognized it as belonging to Mr. Hamilton and decided I should send it back to his estate but it was acting rather strange. It kept moving away from me whenever I approached and, although it was probably foolish for to think it, it seemed to want to show me something. Low and behold you were not even a twenty meters from my home. I brought you back and called for a doctor, you had a terrible head wound but he said that you would wake up soon. Luckily he was correct, the sun has just only begun to set.” He explained. That’s crazy! Seriously universe? Why do you have to be such a bitch to me?!

“I don’t know what to say… Thank you, Mr. Burr! You really saved my life! I don’t know how I can thank you enough let alone repay you for this!”

“No need for thanks, I couldn’t just leave you out to die now could I? And in terms of repayment, I shall talk with Alexander about that.” Talk with Alex…Fuck… He’s not supposed to know about what happened! And hell I’ve already caused them enough trouble, why do I have to be like this?! He’s going to have to pay money for my idiocy! Ugh! He could read your disappointment as if you were actually saying it to him.

“Is something the matter?” He asked. Fuck.

“No, no, no, no, no! That’s perfectly fine! It’s just… I don’t exactly like having other people pay my debts but I suppose I’ll have to just live with it.” This is going to be bad when they get back… He closed his eyes like he was thinking about something. You couldn’t read his expression at all, which was something that Alex frequently complained about him. He was elusive.

“I have a proposition for you then, Miss Titania.” What?

“A proposition?” You asked.

“My wife you see, has fallen quite ill and we are a bit short of staff. I am aware that the Hamiltons are up town for the winter. Perhaps, while they are away, you could lend your services to help around here.” He offered.

“Seriously? Thank you so much, Mr. Burr! I just really don’t want to cause any problems for Alex and I’ll work really hard to make sure my debt is paid-“ He shushed you.

“Talk less.” Wait, what? “I will take that as a yes, however there are some rules you must follow.”

“Oh, um, of course.”

“Things are done very differently around here than at Alexander’s. You are at the Burr estate now and you must behave as such. Based on how you have worked at the Hamilton’s I can tell that your personality is rather… loud. That will not be the case while you are with me. Talk less, smile more. That is how you shall operate. You will be expected to hold a demeanor of calm and collectiveness at all times. I will not tolerate anything less, is that clear?” You were surprised by how serious he was while speaking to you, you were actually taken aback. I suppose not everything could be as accepting as it is with them… Even with the terms being so out of character for you, you knew you had to try. So you agreed to the conditions.

That night you were given back your horse and set out for the estate. You felt slightly uncomfortable with having to ride again after what happened but it was your only option. You were going to be a maid for the Burr’s and would have to leave at dawn every morning to get there on time for work. You got back home, led the horse back to the stables and went inside. You hastily prepared a fire to ward off the chill in your bones. You weren’t sure why but you didn’t have a good feeling about this.

…

Dear Starlight,

It already feels as though I have been away from you a century, has it truly only been a month and a half since I have seen you? I miss you, I miss our conversations, I miss your lectures, I miss your voice, your spirit, your passion. I miss it all, everything down to the way you hold a teacup as though it could fall apart in your hands. It is very quiet uptown; I do not think I like the quiet though. It feels empty and, dare I say, a bit lonely without you by my side to share your thoughts on this world we live in. Everyone else misses you as well. Father and Mother have been telling Grandfather all about you, he seems to find you quite charming. Angelica says that studying is becoming a bore without you there to give her alternative methods of remembering her work. Even Alexander, James and John seem quite withdrawn; specifically, they long for one of your fairytales. I have no idea what they are talking about but it has something to do with a fruit that can show you everything you desire? Or was it about gaining knowledge from it? It sounds fascinating, then again, everything about you intrigues me. It is surprising to think that it has not even been an entire year since our first meeting, I feel as though I have known you my entire life. Although since we are on a similar subject, I have some rather exciting news. My birthday is next week! I shall be turning sixteen, soon enough I will no longer be considered a boy but instead a young man. However, I only care about that title when it comes to you. Your wit and luminosity may suggest you consider me an equal. Yet, does that mean your heart sees me as such? I wish not to be considered a child in thine eyes, a boy who becomes as red as a blooming rose over his frivolous romanticized fantasies. I do not think the word ‘different’ quite fits how I see you, perhaps extraordinary would be a better term? You are not like any of the other maidens I have encountered; you are bold, utterly silly and stubborn in every wondrous way. You are the brightest star is the sky, the North Star. Others gaze upon you and wonder where you shall lead them, while I can only hope that you will take pity on a soul deprived of your love, a soul left completely helpless. I see your eyes and smile in the night sky, Lord knows that I have prayed. I have prayed that you will leave your celestial heaven and keep beside me. Is it not embarrassing? Even on paper I cannot articulate what I am feeling without becoming muddled. Perhaps it is best if I wait to express myself when I meet you at the end of February. Until then ma cherié, please do not forget to write. I know you must be busy as to not have the time to write but that shall not stop my own writing tendencies, your words bring me more joy than you could possibly imagine.

Sincerely yours,

P. Ham, your sunshine.

Your mind and your heart were telling you two distinctly different things by the time you finished reading Philip’s letter. Why does everything have to be so complicated?! You held your head in your hands, trying to decide what to do next. It’s been two weeks since you started to work for Aaron Burr and to say you hated it would an understatement. You’ve never felt so restricted in your entire life, it was huge reality check for you. Not everything could be all feminism and modern like it was with Alexander. Proper etiquette hangs over your head constantly, you never expected Burr to be as uptight as he is. It isn’t all bad though, Mrs. Burr is actually quite lovely. She tells you many stories of her younger days when she’s well enough to speak cohesively. Honestly, the best times were when she was awake, it always gave you the chance to take a breather from Aaron. He wants to be by her side as often as time allows, he acts like a completely different person around her. He’s happy. That doesn’t last too long though, and Sarah doesn’t help much either. Sarah was the maid that was ‘by your side’ when you awoke at the Burr estate. She’s kind of, maybe, the worst person. She frequently taunts you for the position you’re in and tries to accuse you because of your relationship with the Hamilton’s. “I know what you did, who knew a man would actually defend his whore.” When you asked her what she was trying to imply she said. “I wonder how the son reacted to learn that his whore was also his father’s. I believe I would pay to see such an encounter!” No matter how many times you try to convince her of the truth, she just shuts you down and claims that a prostitute will do anything to hide her sins. First of all, I’ll do what I damn well please with my body! Second of all, I DID NOT have an affair with Alexander! Seriously, I thought this whole situation was over! You didn’t have time to read the letter before you had to leave for work, so you took it with you. You heard footsteps from beyond the door you were behind and quickly hid the letter in your bodice. You stood up from where you were sitting at the dining room table, taking your spare cloth off of your apron and using it to wipe the table. You know, to make it seem like you were working even though there was nothing to clean yet. Sarah, cold looking as ever, came bursting in.

“Good morning, Miss Home Wrecker. I will be taking care of Lady Burr today, which means you will be in charge of everything else for the day. I suggest you be on your best behavior, or else you shall receive quite a tongue lashing from Mr. Burr… Although you probably want that!” She snorted as she left you alone to fester in your anger. Fuck you too, Sarah! Okay Y/N, calm down. It’s only for another five or so weeks. I can do this! Just put on your best smile and suck it up, buttercup! You took a deep breath and left to take your normal rounds. Things were going relatively smoothly, at least until mid-day approached.

You heard a carriage drawing into the ‘driveway’ as you started to call it. Ugh, a visitor… Normally, you wouldn’t mind having to greet a visitor, but you haven’t had to deal with any of Burr’s guest yet. You weren’t excited. Nevertheless, you did what you were taught, you walked over to the door and smiled sweetly. You heard footsteps and you opened the door, closing your eyes to block out the brightness from the light hitting the snow outside.

“Welcome to the Burr estate! What may I do for you today?” You asked in a bubbly voice.

“Well I’ll be damned.” Oh no. Please let it be a hallucination! Please let it be a hallucination! You slowly opened your eyes and to no surprise the first thing you see is a bright color. Magenta. The whole image started to fade in, Thomas Jefferson, in all his horridness, was standing in front of you. On top of that, you had to greet him with a smile and give him hospitality. I’d rather shut the door in his face… You bit your tongue and moved out of the way for him so that he could enter. “Well, well, well, Miss Titania! I would never guess I would find you here. What brings you? I thought Hamilton was away for the winter?” He gave you a mischievous grin as you shut the door behind him.

“Simply working, nothing worthy of noting.” You said through gritted teeth. He chuckled, but before he could retort, Burr’s voice echoed from the nearby staircase.

“Hello Thomas, forgive me but my wife is awake at the moment so I must focus on her. Miss Taylor, please make him some tea.” Can I pour the tea on him?! You nodded to the demand, you couldn’t exactly say no. You turned and began to walk towards the dining room.

“Take a seat, I’ll be back with your tea shortly.” You lashed, obviously annoyed. He smiled, but he didn’t sit down.

“Actually, I would much rather follow you. I hate not having company and personally, I’d say you make some pretty fine company.” He raised his eyebrows up slightly. This bitch… You shot him a thin smile and turned to walk into the kitchen, rolling your eyes as he trailed behind you. You began the tea preparations, hoping that he would at least give you the pleasure of not speaking. You were not granted that pleasure.

“How have you been Miss Titania?” He asked, your back turned to him.

“Fine.” You said insipidly. You began to heat up the water and turned to find Jefferson a few feet away from you.

“That’s a rather noxious injury you’ve got there.” He pointed and traced out in the air the slight crescent shape from the stitching on your left temple. You covered it up with your hand. “May I ask how that happened?” He asked with curiosity in his brown eyes, you spoke as you walked past him to grab the tea box.

“It seems that I am no equestrian, Mr. Jefferson.” You said with dun. He clicked his tongue.

“I see.” After that, things went silent for a moment. You got out the teapot and made the tea, now all that was left was for you to set up the tray and cups, you assumed Burr would join him shortly. You set the tray down, picked out he saucers, the cream and sugar as well. You grabbed one of the tea cups with both hands, careful not to drop it and as you picked up the second one, Thomas spoke up.

“How has Philip been recently.”

Crack, shatter, puncture, warm.

Some glass fragments from the delicate cup began to trickle from your seizing hands, the pieces digging into your palms. You whipped your head around, shock was etched into his features and it only grew deeper when he saw the burning hatred on your own.

“Don’t ever! You do not have the right to ask me about him after what you did! You made him hate me! Even if it was only for a day, it killed me! You do not deserve the grace of hearing his effulgent name, let alone say it!” You spat, you had had enough. You couldn’t hold back anymore, you were tumultuous. You felt like crying, screaming, and being sick all at the same time. He doesn’t deserve to know how wonderful that family is! He almost ruined them! He threw his hands up to show peace.

“Whoa, perhaps it would be best to calm down.” He said in an oddly soothing voice. You wanted to yell, don’t tell me to calm down! But you realized something.

The cup

You opened your hands and the rest of the glass fell to the floor, there were tiny cuts on your hands and blood prickled out from the ends but that’s not what you cared about. Fuck! You crouched down onto the ground and frantically began to pick up the pieces, gathering them up in your apron cloth to hold them.

“No, no, no, no! Burr’s going to kill me!” You spoke breathlessly and then a voice you really didn’t want to hear.

“Why am I going to kill you?” Burr asked dryly. He looked down at what you were doing, his expression blank. You hated that look, it made you even more fearful than most things. The idea that he could be thinking of anything and you wouldn’t know terrified you enough as it was. But now it was directed at you. You were about to apologize, try to convince him it was an accident and that you were sorry but you were interrupted.

“I dropped my cup, you know me Burr, my senses are never quite right when I’m around a pretty lady! I’ll pay for it, don’t worry about it!” Jefferson laughed. What? What’s he doing? Burr sighed and shook his head, rubbing his temples, which he commonly did when he was stressed.

“Seriously, Thomas? You can’t stop your womanizing for even a second? Well… It’s not the good china so I suppose no harm was done. I came in here to tell you that we shall head to the cabinet in a moment, I just have to get properly dressed first. It’ll only be a moment. Taylor, please clean up this mess.” He said as he turned and left the two of you alone once more. You quickly gathered up the rest of the glass and stood up, making sure it wouldn’t fall out of the sides of your apron, the edges you holding lightly between your fingers. You turned to look at Jefferson.

“Why…? Why did you cover for me?” You were dumbfounded, he took a deep breath.

“I know how Burr can be, it was honestly just better to say that I did it. Besides, I’m not a scoundrel all the time you know?” You disposed of the glass as he stepped closer to you. He was only a foot away from you by the time you noticed, he held out his hand.

“May I see your hands?” He asked calmly. You reluctantly showed him your hands, he held one in each of his and inspected them closely. “Hm, you should be alright. Clean them up, use a cloth to stop the bleeding and if anyone asks, tell them you slipped on the ice outside.” He instructed, you nodded along, still a bit confused.

“Why would you help me? Don’t you hate me or what I stand for or something?” He sighed at your question.

“Listen, I will admit that my accusations were under a false pretense, that I apologize for. I wasn’t asking you about Philip to be antagonizing, I was genuinely curious. I talked to James a while back and he told me about what you said. ‘I don’t care about my name’ All you care about is everyone else’s wellbeing. You could say it put things into perspective for me. Why would a whore care about her ‘lover’ and not have it be about money? Why would Hamilton write an entire pamphlet to protect the dignity of one mistress but incriminate the other? It doesn’t make sense, unless I’m wrong and that you truly had nothing to do with it. It was presumptuous of me, and for that I am very sorry. When it comes to Philip however, I am rather close to Angelica and we have discussed the two of you the recently. So do not worry, I get it.” He let go of your hands and gave you a soft smile, walking past you towards the exit into the dining room. “I should meet with Burr, perhaps I shall meet with you again in the future, Titania? It would be a real shame to not see your pretty face again. Au revoir, mademoiselle.” He waved goodbye to you with that same grin on his face. What just happened? Is he not an asshole 24/7? You were left to stew in your questions for a bit, but you eventually followed the directions he gave you, pushing the questions to the back of your mind. Which then made new questions form.

What am I going to do when they get back?

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