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lucabyte · 8 months ago

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obligatory ramble about postcanon loop ask

also your art is amazing

Hiiiiiiiii :D thank you :)!!

and thank you for the excuse to post the. just absolute wall of text that i truncated down to form the tags of that post. (i did,,, hit the tag limit. i forgot tumblr had one of those...) so let me just paste that and tidy it up a bit...

I am putting this under a readmore because it's a bit long. but:

This is like. The General Context for all* of my postcanon doodles? (Except AUs obviously) Like this is the base idea I've been drawing them all in. So, feel free to backread with this in mind. I've basically had this 'postcanon' timeline set in my brain since finishing the game...

My general thoughts are that I like the idea of Loop (even if through dubiously ethical means) being able to slowly reintegrate with the party as a whole new person, because they are, in fact, their own person.

It's a muddle of thematic threads im pulling on and "wouldn't it be fucked up if", but. (at its core, it's powered by the fact that like, while narratively isat's theme of 'the only person who can truly take the first step to help you is yourself'. (wrt: loop helping the party help siffrin in act 5) which i LOVE AND IS GREAT NARRATIVELY…. would be super fucked up irl to learn that your friend 'learned as a lesson' while you stood by kinda uselessly. I know i'd be upset about it. but thats mostly background here. doesn't really come up. at least not until loop has to explain who they are and the party realises they had to fall back on literally themselves again for help, but i digress,)

The real core concept is: Occam's razor. It is like, inherently, a buckwild thing to accuse a person of being somehow a clone or copy of your friend. Even if they start vaguely alluding to a backstory it's far more likely they were some other person before all that. (I still think Odile has that theory in the back pocket but she's rational enough to know it's a really long shot without a solid explanation. and i think Loop deep down knows this, and would, if cornered into confessing, turn the situation around to go J'ACCUSE and make HER explain it instead. Ever longer dodging being direct with their emotions...)

And the party are nice! And if someone has changed and wants to keep stuff secret it's kind of not their business? (Though it's hard not to speculate… see: the main joke of the doodles) And they seem important to Siffrin so they just try to accept them abrasive quirks and all. And eventually the question of their prior identity just fades away since, well, they're Loop. Their friend Loop.

but yeah. personal headcanon is that a few months/weeks after picking up and getting aquainted with Nille** (since that was presumably the IMMEDIATE TASK postgame), Loop reappears (either after a literal period of nonexistance, or just spending a few months wandering the french countryside alone being attacked by wild dogs). Since Siffrin has had a while to be therapised by the party they're doing mostly okay, but Loop showing up and still being agitated/aggressive pulls them both into a bit of a backslide behaviourally and puts the party on the back foot again.

Hooowever, I do think that due to no longer being literally stewing in the worst pressure cooker of all time together, the two do mostly actually sort themselves out with productive conversation. (Via a cycle of: genuinely distressing argument -> weeeird lovebombing -> ok we're good -> repeat, that gets less intense over time)

Thus, allowing the party to just. Integrate loop as a new person. They and Siffrin shuffle into different ecological niches (Loop taking over stuff Siffrin is now too squeamish for, etc (see: hunting, mostly)), and while it's not exactly what Loop wanted they generally get that beggars can't be choosers and it's a pretty good deal. And the rest of the party does straight up just like them as a friend, especially when Loop quits trying to actively antagonise them after a few weeks of being around them, since they just can't keep up being mean to people they like forever.

As for how I think the truth eventually drags itself out. This is where I invoke The Isabeau Torment Nexus™. So its gonna get shippy here for a bit hold on.

Which is, I think giving them time before Loop reappears long enough that Siffrin and Iseabeau actually manage to become established, Isabeau has to be the one to nudge the pair of them and go. "Hey. You know we're in Vaugarde right. I'm okay with polyamory if we all communicate." Before Loop and Siffrin actually even acknowledge that whatever the fuck they have going on kinda looks a lot like a relationship of some kind. (or have already been agonising about that via fighting and arguing, depending) (Obviously this comes after Isa "Emotionally intelligent enough to keep a lid on the jealousy" Beau has managed to use that big brain of his to Not just go Scream somewhere on the daily because oh godddd they keep talking like theyre suicide-baiting each other jesus chriiist. is it overstepping his boundaries to bring that up?? god)

This, taking a bunch of the tension out of Loop and Isabeau's relationship (Since I imagine Loop is a. being weird for the obvious reasons and b. feeling kinda guilty about 'getting in the way of' Siffrin and Iseabeau), allows them to actually get close in a normal friend way. (I think an interesting turning point could be Isabeau actually taking Loop's side in an argument vs Siffrin, which would absolutely break Loop's brain. Especially if it's an argument that matters. Like what do you mean he isn't just going to play favourites. What?)

Then Isabeau, just actually open minded and charmed by Loop (and maybe even somewhat at Siffrin's suggestion?) tries to close the final open side on the polyamory triangle here and that's the final straw for Loop on "This lie by omission is too unethical to keep up, this is just actually sick and wrong. I can't do this while he doesn't know who I am." Though. Obviously it probably goes. Very poorly with emotions high like that. And the added element of several months of deceit. Getting dark here for a second but that dagger is going MISSING and so are THEY for a hot minute.

Then yaaay everything works out in the end 👍 yippieee!! all it took was maybe a lot of harrowed recontextualisation of all the weird shit your new friend said and did when it turns out they're your old friend. It's fine.

But yeah. this is basically the context all of my postcanon doodles have existed within? And those exist to give other people something to chew on. So this does too.

I suppose TL;DR: Imagine if sloopis almost fucking happens before isabeau knows who loop is. can you fucking imagine. can you imagine having to navigate that. nightmare.

*Yes this includes the implied cannibalism comic. Uhh. Comes part and parcel with headcanoning that Loop went way off the deep end similar to A5 Sif But Maybe Worse before giving in. Add weepy half-asleep confessions to murder wherever you see fit in your mind palace. 👍👍👍

**Re: Nille footnote. I don't have anywhere to put this besides here! I have some thoughts on Loop and Nille having an odd dynamic. I don't imagine Nille to be super gung-ho on trusting a bunch of adults (even if they are majority around her age) given their implied backstory. It's probably a big shock to the system, especially since Bambouche is a good couple hundred Kilometers up north from Dormont and these guys don't seem to have trains. She would've been unfrozen and without Bonnie for some time....

Which is to say: I think she's suspicious of them. I think she may be looking for excuses to distance herself, keep Bonnie safe. SO.... A new guy showing up? And antagonising the party? What do they know that I don't...? I should find out.

And since... Loop didn't ever know Nille, they have no ammunition or real reason to be cruel. Plus, if they're trying to stay on Bonnie's good side (SINCE... if Bonnie thought Loop was cringe they may as well kill themselves. In their mind.) they SUPER have no reason to antagonise Nille.

Mostly, they might be able to open up to each other easier than they can the rest of the party?

I feel like this resolves with Loop feeling compelled to apologise for what they and Siffrin let happen to Bonnie, though... Hmm... Depends on how you interpret Nille that they'd be glad nobody else had been told about that yet, or furious it had been secret this long. I lean toward the former.

#PHEW THIS IS LONG. i wrote some extra footnotes and tidied it up a bit. but uh. here you go! my personal headcanon baseline for postcanon.#i could probably elaborate more but that would get unwieldy. like i have opinions on loop's dynamics w each party member but. LONG POST...#lucabytetalks #isat #isat spoilers #in stars and time #isat loop #isiloop #sloopis #WONT be tagging everyone thats absurd. loop centric post though with a chunk about nille at the end #isat act 6 spoilers

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ohbo-ohno · 1 year ago

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Please please bo sort a girl out with Ghoap x Reader in an abandoned farm 🤪🤪

1k game here - no more please!

@luminousbeings-crudematter my beloved!!! idk if tumblr gives you a notif when i post an ask you sent so im tagging you just in case lol. also you said "unhinged texas chainsaw massacre" and i tried my best but i've never seen that movie :')

3.8k of ghoap x reader ft. ghost and soap hunting down their newest pet in a corn maze (cw: rough noncon sex, kinda puppy play? super light) this is mostly soap x reader, sorry!!

The collar is heavy around your neck, making every breath difficult as you pant. Your lungs seize in your chest when you stumble through the corn maze, desperate for any light at the end of the tunnel.

It doesn't come, but you push on anyways.

The corn is rough against your arms and legs, your body vulnerable to the rough stalks with so many tears in your clothes. Everything hurts - your feet from the rough ground, your throat from all the screaming, your stomach from pure fear and adrenaline. You're too blinded from terror to focus on any of that, the only thought in your head to go go go go get away.

The roar of a chainsaw is loud somewhere to your right. You nearly fall to your knees at the sound, windmilling your eyes to keep yourself steady. A loud, manic laugh echoes from the same direction, and your legs nearly give out.

Fuck, he's right there.

You can't think about how close the sound is, can't focus on how you swear you can see the corn moving, you can only run.

The stalks split in front of you, and you stumble into a clearing. You freeze, feet stopped right on the border of the new area. You bounce onto your toes, like you'd been tugged to a stop before exposing yourself.

The clearing is empty accept for an old tractor, sitting in the center of the grass. It's just a large enough circle that you'd be exposed for several seconds if you tried to reach it, totally clear if anyone was in the stalks.

But... you could hide there, couldn't you? The machine looks massive from your vantage point, there's surely a place to hide there.

It feels cruel to leave your fellow victims to the killers hunting them down, but you know that you have to try and save yourself before trying to help someone else.

You take a deep breath as you sink back to your heels, crouching a little lower in the corn to see if you can spot any movement around the perimeter.

The chainsaw revs again, and someone screams.

Your decision is made for you. The sound of death sends you forward, instinct making you move.

The dirt is rough beneath your feet, small rocks sticking into the soft parts of your sole and offsetting your run. You try your best to keep your balance, eyes trained on the tractor and the small space you know you can squeeze in.

It's silent but for the sound of your own panting, blood rushing through your ears, nothing but that perceived safety in your mind.

Just as you start to ready your legs to launch yourself up to the seat, legs tensing, you're shoved away. Your breath is forced from your lungs as you hit the ground, dirt and rocks shoved into your arms as you roll.

"Ah!" You cry out, forced to your stomach as you roll. It takes a minute to recognize what's happened, for it to click in your mind that someone's there.

It's too late by the time you realize.

You still try to get away, some animal part of you knowing that it's dangerous to stay down.

You manage to get to your knees, eyes darting wildly to spot whoever's tackled you, to know what direction to run. But the field is empty, and you're already moving before you think to look behind you.

It costs you, because you hardly get a step away before you're shoved to the ground again, your attacker staying over your body.

"Where you goin'?" The man rumbles in your ear, his chest pressed to your back and lips against your ear. He nips the shell of your ear and your eyes fly open, face shoved into the dirt.

Hardly a foot away, a chainsaw rests in the dirt. Blood drenches the blade, slowly dripping into a puddle beneath the weapon. It makes you whimper, trying to squirm away from the killer above you.

"No, no, no," he purrs, nosing his way to your cheek and just leaning there, pressing his smile into your skin, his voice rumbling through your back. "Down, pup, c'mon, you're caught. No point in runnin'."

"Please-" you gasp, neck arching to try and get away. "Please, please, please-"

He makes a sound that's somewhere between a laugh and a grunt. "Please, please, please?" His voice pitches up in a mocking tone, a horrible imitation of yours. "You a broken record, lass? Only wanna say the same thing? Come on, tha's no fun, gimme something new."

You shout, the sound caught somewhere between a cough and a sob, hands stretching forward and clawing at the earth. "Please!"

He truly laughs now, a sharp noise in your ear. He stretches himself up above you, chest lifting and hips pushing into yours so that your legs are pinned. All you can do it try to drag yourself forward, hot tears beginning to fall as you're held down in the same place.

"Guess it does sound good from your lips," he muses. He shifts behind you, knees squeezing to either side of your hips and hands reaching so he can grab your elbows.

"Look'it you," he tsks, bending forward to lace your hands together. You cry out at the feeling of being covered, his chest above your head. "Ruinin' your pretty nails, and for what?"

Your head drops to the ground, sobs tearing your throat to shreds as spit falls from your lips. You feel bile working in your stomach, that horrible tension beneath your tongue like you're about to throw up.

"I can't-" you gasp, panic clawing at your mind. You know this man is going to kill you, that he's going to make it hurt, and every part of you rebels at just the thoughts. You can't stop fighting, can't stop trying to get away from him even with the weight holding you down.

"Can't what?" He hums, shifting to kneel above you so that he's not nearly suffocating you. "Can't go anywhere? Naw, bonnie, you're not goin' anywhere now. Caught you fair and square, didn't I?"

There's a part of you that screams to try and argue, to take a deep breath and settle to see if you can make some sort of deal, but the bigger part of you can't calm down, can't do anything but try and shove yourself out from the maniac above you.

"Plus, if I let you go runnin' off you might get caught by Simon." His arms settle on your shoulders and you can't help but yelp, ducking your head low to try and protect your neck. "Then I'd lose. You want that? Thought we were closer than that, lass."

You sob, teeth clenched tight. You don't fucking know the man, you don't know whoever Simon is, you just want to go home.

"That's what I thought," he hums. "Now," he pushes up, and your arms and torso are free as he settles back to rest his weight on your thighs. "I think you and I have some time to play, hm? Before Simon catches us both."

You don't- you don't know what he means, and it's hard to breathe past the fear. It clicks when his hands move to your hips, gripping them tightly.

"Wait," you gasp, eyes flying wide when his fingers creep beneath the hem of your jeans. "Wait, stop-"

"Oh, look at that," he laughs, hands shoving further down until his palms wrap around your thighs. "Learned some new words, baby?"

Your eyes squeeze as your feet kick against the dirt, unable to find any traction without shoes. Scrabbling so frantically only to stay right where you're pinned only serves to work you up more, to make your heart race faster.

"You're warm," he hums, kneading at your thighs and using his wrists to force the pants down, slowly revealing more and more of your skin to the cold night air. "Gonna warm me up, lass?"

"No," you hiss, the realization of what he's going to do sinking in. Your pants are pulled down to mid thigh, keeping your thighs from spreading and leaving your backside on display. "Stop- I'll- don't you dare-"

He laughs again, landing a harsh smack to your vulnerable ass. You cut your begging off with a yelp, hips rocketing into the ground to try and escape the sting when he lands another slap.

"You tryin' to boss me around? Real cute, pup, but you don't have a leg to stand on. Stuck pinned in the dirt and still tryin' to be in charge?" He laughs again, blows shifting from slaps to taps, jiggling the fat of your ass. "Cute, bonnie. Real cute."

You fold an arm beneath your face, try to use the other to force yourself up. "Stop fucking- stop hitting me, you bastard!"

"Oh!" He cackles, his lap slap almost bruising in it's force. "She's got some spine, huh? Maybe you'll be more fun than I thought."

You snarl into the dirt, legs kicking up behind you to try and hit his back. He's too high up on your thighs o reach, and you end up kicking the air like a toddler throwing a tantrum. It only fuels your anger, makes you feel more stuck.

"Keep fightin', bonnie." He presses himself closer to your face, and you catch a glimpse of sharp teeth from your peripheral, his smile sharp. "Makes it more fun for me. Think you'll tighten up if you kick kickin' and screamin'?"

You scream, a primal sound straight from the gut as you throw your head back and to the side, trying to hit him. You somehow manage it, but you hurt yourself just as much. You cry out at the sudden pain in the back of your skull, crumbling back to the ground.

There's a loud moan over your shoulder, and his hips press into yours. He's hard to your horror, his length pressing against the softness of your ass. "Fuck, that felt good."

God, the man is disturbed.

Your attempted attack doesn't stop him from hooking his fingers in your underwear, tugging them down to rest in the crease where your thighs meet your ass.

"Pretty," he purrs, hands stroking from your rips to your jeans, hands pushing hard enough to make you whine. His treatment is all too rough, like he's trying to mold you into the shape he wants. "Can't wait to get my dick in you," he groans, groping you.

"Nooo," you whine, trying to push yourself into the dirt, like it might open you up and swallow you whole, help you escape the horror you can't do anything to stop. "You can't- you can't fuck me, please, don't-"

He moans again, and you hear the clinking of a belt being undone. "Fuck, say it again for me."

Your eyes squeeze shut. You want to be anywhere else, anywhere but here.

You feel the heat of his cock against your ass, and tears sting in your eyes. You taste dirt against your lips, feel your palms sluggishly bleed from the scrapes against the rough ground. You try to focus on everything but what the killer's doing to you, but's impossible

His palm cups your center, fingers wrapping around your vulva and holding firmly. You flinch when his middle finger works between your folds, coming to rest on your clit.

"Need to get you wet," he mumbles, starting to work at the nub to coax some pleasure out of your body. "Simon wouldn't like it if I made you bleed." He snorts, then corrects, "Well, bleeding down there. Won't be shocked if he wants to carve you up a bit."

You shiver, focused too much on staying stiff and keeping your mind as far away as possible to put off the inevitable. What he says doesn't even properly click in your mind, floating in one ear and out the other.

"There we go," he purrs, palm growing slick as your body warms to him unwillingly. He grunts as he shifts to use both hands, one focusing on your clit and the other coming back to tease at your hole.

Two fingers slip in without warning and you yelp at the sudden stretch, hips bucking back instinctively and forcing the fingers further. Your moan is pulled from your chest, part pleasure and part pain.

"You want more lass? Here, don't mind stretching you out."

The third finger comes too soon, too suddenly, and the sting edges too close to pain for you to feel good, even unwillingly.

He's got no patience at all, fingers spreading inside of you while his thumb works furiously at your clit. The mix of good and bad leaves your head clouded, tears slowing as your mind starts to float away a bit.

He moans against your back, face pressed into your shoulder. "Feel so tight, bonnie. Can't wait til you're wrapped around me, wet and tight... fuck, can't wait much longer..."

His teeth press into you throw the fabric of your shirt, the bite only slightly blunted. You breath stutters out of your chest, lips shaking. You want to fight, tell yourself that you should bite and claw and scream, but he's already proven to you that he'd only enjoy that. All you can do is lie in the dirt, lamp and shaking.

Despite all your fear and your hatred for the man over you, you wish he'd stretched you out more.

"Gotta get inside of ya," he grunts, tugging his fingers out with a terribly wet sound. You can hear him sucking your wetness off of them as he shifts further up, letting his hard length rest between your thighs. "Don't... God, you taste good, don't wanna stretch you out too much. You get it, yeah bonnie?"

You whine forlornly, turning your head to the side. You can see him over your shoulder - tall and broad, brown hair in a... mohawk?, bright teeth shown off in a smile. He ducks down while he fists his cock, dipping himself into your wetness.

Wet lips press a kiss to your cheek, a trail of that wetness left against your face. When he pulls back you see the blood dripping from his nose, sniffle at the realization that he's left his own blood over your face.

"Look pretty in red," he whispers, tone oddly soft. It tugs another tear out of you, dripping down the bridge of your nose. His free hand comes up to your face, running a finger through the tear track and sucking the drop off his fingertip. "Taste good everywhere, love."

Your eyes close when he notches himself at your hole, pressing in just enough for you to feel the stretch. He's massive, and the prospect of him shoving himself fully inside of you... you shudder, trying to loosen yourself as much as you can.

He's not kind when he pushes in. You're not sure why you hoped he would be, not with the blood-soaked chainsaw still in your line of sight. But the sudden fullness, the sting, the stretch, draws a high cry from your lips.

His groan nearly drowns out your sounds, your walls spasming around him to try and adjust. You hate that it feels so good for him when you feel like you can hardly breathe around him.

"Feels so good," he moans, words hardly enunciated, thick accent only thickened by his pleasure. You can hardly understand him, far too upset to bother translating him in your head.

"Can't-" he pants, hips jerking out just a few inches only to buck back into yours, pushing as far inside as he can. "Can't come, but can get you off, yeah?"

There's a part of you that's confused by that, that wonders what the fuck he's talking about, but a much larger part of you is focused on the slow drag inside of you.

It would feel better if you were a little wetter, a little more stretched out, but you can't change those things. You relax, try to force your body to cooperate just to make things easier. You try to lean into the parts that do feel good - the way his cock drags against all the most sensitive parts of you, the slap of his balls against your clit - and sink into that pleasant feeling instead of the adrenaline still lingering in your veins.

He doesn't speak when he fucks into you, forehead pressed into your shoulder blade as he starts to drive you truly insane. It starts feeling good quickly enough for you to forget the pain, the horror, and you gladly fall into the oblivion creeping over your mind.

It's good, as horrible as it is to think. The bastard knows what he's doing.

It's some indeterminate amount of time later when you hear the stalks shifting again, eyes flying open just in time to see a man step into the clearing.

The man over you moans when the stranger gets closer, turning his head to the side. His hips buck into you even more roughly, your thighs beginning to ache from the force.

"Simon," he calls out, and it clicks in your head.

The new man is masked and wearing all black, and you recognize him as the other killer hunting you through the maze. His mask is just as terrifying from close up as it was when you first glanced over your shoulder while running, the sight of him in the distance almost floating while surrounded by shadows.

"Bein' good, Johnny?" He rumbles, boots stopping next to the chainsaw and toeing it away.

"Yes, sir," the man over you - Johnny - grunts, thrusts erratic. "Left-left the ring on, haven't come, promise."

There's a hum from above you, the man crouching down. "Good boy. Woulda had to ruin your fun if you got yourself off."

He whines at that, and you can't help but furrow your eyebrows. The man above you going from cocky and terrifying asshole to whining and moaning above you doesn't fit with the image you'd had in your head.

"I ken. 'S why I didn't take it off, ye bawbag." Johnny's voice shakes a bit as he switches to grinding against you, hips pressed flush with yours. The sudden pressure against your clit and so deep inside of you leaves you moaning, eyes rolling back. The peak of an orgasm is right there, just out of reach, and you reach for it desperately.

"Watch it," Simon scolds, shifting forward to his knees and reaching far enough to slap Johnny, the sound echoing through the silent clearing. Your eyes fly open, instinctually flinching away.

Simon's head tilts down to you, ignoring Johnny's whine. His gloved hand comes down to rest on your face, gripping your chin and lifting enough to get a good look at your face.

"Pretty thing," he says, giving your face a little shake before letting you drop to the ground. You can't even begin to care so close to the edge, focus solely on getting off

"'S what I said."

"Hmm. Why don't you go ahead and get the poor pup off? Looks like she's cockdrunk enough as is, might as well get her the whole way there before we take her home."

"With pleasure, sir."

It's hard to focus after that point. Johnny's hand tunnels beneath your stomach and to your clit, working his hips in full thrusts and rubbing you so perfectly. It takes hardly any time at all to get you off, the perfect mix of sensations sending you flying over that edge.

You're not sure what happens between the time when you come and when Johnny pulls out. Your vision nearly whites out, moving away from the scrapes and bruises and into the pleasure gripping every muscle. It's so much easier to lean into the good than the bad, to pretend the warmth is just the pleasure instead of the man at your back.

You're brought back into the real world by the feeling of something being wrapped around your neck, left just tight enough for you to jerk, panicked you couldn't breathe.

"Hush, pup," Simon shushes when you jerk up, eyes flying wide. "Just givin' you your collar. Makin' sure anyone who spots you can take you right home, hm?"

Johnny tugs you up as Simon speaks, grip just a tad too rough on your shoulders when he pulls you up to your knees. You're still a bit out of it as he tucks your jeans and underwear up, dick hard and slick against the small of your back.

The fear comes back as you're brought to your feet by Simon, hands on your elbows tugging you up. You're unsteady on your feet, knees almost knocking together while you blearily blink up at the masked man.

The sound of metal clinking together, a small yank against your neck, is what brings you fully back into your skin. Simon clips a leash to your collar and then Johnny's, matching pink and blue leads that make your eyebrows furrow.

Johnny - shirtless, drenched in blood - smiles at you, teeth stained with his own blood.

"Come on," Simon rumbles, a sudden tug against your throat nearly sending you to your feet. "Need to get you home, pup."

Johnny catches you before you can fall, laughing as he helps you up. The sight of a black studded collar at his throat jars you, fingers lifting to feel at the fabric around your throat. It's not studded, just a soft leather with a thick ring at the front where the leash connects.

"Looks good on you," Johnny compliments, guiding you to stumble along behind Simon as the man leads you both away, into one of the entrances to the maze.

"What..." your throat is rough and you cough, heartbeat picking up. "What're you doing?"

Johnny's smile is a little condescending, almost herding you forward by staying half behind you. "Takin' you home, lass. You're the last one alive. You make a pretty final girl, bonnie."

There's a sharp yank at your collar, tugging your attention to Simon where he's glancing over his shoulder at you. "Think you'll make a good pup. Johnny's been needing a new little friend, might as well be you, hm?"

There's.... nothing really to say to that. You're too weak, too shaky to try and make a run for it. The blue leash is held loose in Simon's hand, but the pink is wrapped tight around his fist. There's no way you're strong enough to jerk it out of his hand, and even if you could you've got no way out of the maze - they already found you first.

Johnny's hand nudges you forward, almost making you fall. He moves to walk beside you, shoulders almost rubbing together. You think the expression he shoots you is supposed to be comforting, but it's anything but.

You breathe deeply, head beginning to throb again, and hope you have the strength to survive what they'll do to you.

#so sorry lumi i feel like this is repetitive and not that well written :( hope you enjoy regardless <3 #by the way... my attempt at johnny's accent.... it happened #luminousbeings-crudematter #< aka the loml #bo writes #1k celebration #ghoap x reader

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lifemod17 · 5 months ago

Text

thoughts on 'Unaired EP'

IN THIS ESSAY I WILL-

below the cut in case you don't want spoilers <3

Nobody's Soldier

THE FUCKIN FALSETTO IS DRIVING ME INSANE ITS LIKE HE LACED THIS SONG WITH CRACK

"Benzos and gasoline" line is WILD (it is so hot for no reason wtf Andrew)

the little break that happens at 1:43 with. i don't even know what that is? like a sort of distorted / reverbed guitar bend / riff? either way, LOVE THAT.

also lets give it up one time for the organ, that is SO GNARLY, YOU CANNOT DENY IT!!!

hearing the live version vs. this recorded one is different, I literally went "OMFG WHAT IS THIS PART" starting at 2:53 when he gets all whisper-y WHY IS IT SO HOT

Listen man, I am a sucker for a good pause, and that pause after the bridge has me UNWELL.

SLOWING IT DOWN for the ending will never not be iconic. you don't see that happening a lot!

the intake of breath on the outro??!! tumblr user lifemod17 is NOT FARING WELL

July

so full of hope and promise and really just about having that thing or that someone to look forward to. The definition of "postpone that funeral"

THE SYNTHS??? FORGIVE HIM FATHER FOR HE HAS SYNTH!!!

"JUST KNOWING THAT'S GETTING ME THROUGH"?!?!?!? I wanna throw up. that is a Tonee-ass line. yeah 'July' is DEFINITELY taking the crown. This is my favorite from the EP.

i WAS right! he says 'prada' because it just made so much sense with the 'wore me out' line.

the whole second half had me in SHAMBLES. the lyrics were already insane but also throw in his soft voice mixed with the FUNKY & GROOVY beat?? I fear it is so over for me (I was genuinely screaming into a pillow and needed to sit down even though I was already sat and also I didn't know what to do with my person so I was just laying there and looking up at the ceiling while fighting off tears. I was SHOOK.)

It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and makes me want to roll downhill a field and pick flowers to give to strangers

Have I mentioned the pen game? Because it is on level 9000. His pen was on fire when he has writing this

B A S S O U T R O GOT ME ACTING TF UP

That You Are

I was not expecting the lyrics to be "that I'd be anywhere that you are". im sorry but that is devastatingly beautiful and rips my heart out brb sobbing

my wig quietly and peacefully ascended from my head.

it's a lot more raw, production wise. the vocals aren't super clean, but I actually really like it this way!!! it makes the song that much more precious, gentle, intimate

Bedouine's vocals NEVER DISAPPOINTS!! She always has a way of transporting you with her music- makes you feel like you're floating above water

I needed to sautee the yearning for this one, its so pretty but hits you right in the feels

The fact that this is speculated to be the contender for the spot of 'I, Carrion (Icarian)' I'M GONNA CRY AGAIN Andrew please do an EP breakdown cuz I need to know!

that little instrumental interlude towards the bridge is so lovely and the entire song really! I think they did a good job of splitting the vibe 50/50 <- I say this because I listen to Bedouine a lot and the vibe of her songs is definitely here. it just really shows that they both wrote this together. its not a feature, its a collab

We're all gonna cry and then afterwards we're all gonna hug cuz this song just inflicted so much emotional damage upon all of us

#hozier #andrew hozier byrne #unaired ep #nobody's soldier #july #that you are #bedouine #Spotify #postpone that funeral

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somerandomdudelmao · 2 years ago

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Hello :D! I was wondering, does Raph have anything different about his vision, like how in the movie we see that Casey's mask does everything that Don's goggles can do (scan, search through data, etc.,)

or is it closer to his regular vision - nothing fancy, he just... sees? Does he see with his robotic eyes, or is it like his eyes cameras that give video feed to a screen? In the latest part he said it was like a video game, and you sort of watch yourself play video games, you aren't actually in them (like a VR headset.) I assume Donnie gave him eyelids to sleep, but does he blink because of his mind's memory of blinking?

You're my favorite Tumblr user dude, thank you for this amazing series!

(if I can ask another question... can he feel? like if not temperature or pain, can he feel vibrations like being touched or hit? or is it just numb everywhere)

I think VR is the closest analogy. After he lost one eye, though, his perception of depth and volume almost disappeared, so now it's not a "VR headset", but more of a "phone screen brought very close to his face.

He has no additional visual interface in his vision, because that made him feel uncomfortable. And Donnie made it possible for the robot to blink just to make it psychologically easier and more familiar for Raph. Well..as much as possible.

Raph closes his eyes purely for the sake of expression. He doesn't need it, and it doesn't give him the same sense of rest for his eyes as if he had a biological body.

He can feel pressure, vibrations, and temperatures, but these sensations are severely muted and become increasingly indistinguishable over time.

He cannot feel pain. He cannot feel tired or energetic. He cannot growl, make his "baby voice," or make any sounds that are too unusual. He cannot feel water. If you pour a bucket of water on him, he will probably know it by the sound. He can't be sleepy in the morning or hungry.

He wants to, though. He wants to be able to feel all these things, even though they may be unpleasant. He wants to, because he sometimes begins to forget exactly how they felt and it depresses him.

#wow that's a lot of words ahah #I like to ramble about robo Raph #I have such an interesting plans for him #well..not in this episode #in the comfort part of the story:)#cass apocalyptic series #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #riseofthetmnt #future raphael #raphael

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thrandilf · 5 months ago

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I've voiced it before but it feels SO weird that The Dragon Prince isn't like, tumblr mainstream, so here's my pitch!

It's got it all- a fantasy world and premise fit for ttrpg campaigns with a rulebook and pre-made campaigns ready to go with more coming soon, it's a fantasy epic that were it live action would probably be compared to Lord of the Rings but with more political intrigue, gray morality built into the magic system, a video game that just dropped, as well as graphic novels so the world is continually growing more fleshed out and there's so many ways to engage with it

It's also made by some of the people behind the original AtLA

And while i hate to boil down shows to their rep, its a talking point for a good reason- The Dragon Prince has more rep of any sort than I've ever seen in a TV show across every board (we just had a lesbian enemies to lovers wedding between a black woman and a Deaf Asian woman last season) and the show never makes people out to be token characters

While S1 may seem a bit slow to some people, there's an immediate jump in animation quality after S1 due to higher framerates, and as a fantasy epic focused on character arcs and cycles, the show hits its stride better and better as it goes on, so I'd really encourage people to give it a chance and watch it take off

For world building, intensely fine tuned character dynamics, a whole cascade of parallels and tidbits to follow for season after season, and all sorts of ways to play with the world, I really rec The Dragon Prince to any fantasy fan who wants something like LotR mixed with AtLA for a wonderful time and an active fandom!

#the dragon prince #fantasy recs #ttrpg #rpgs #media recs #lgbt #queer #queer representation #disability representation #tv show recommendations #giveusthesaga

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heartbeat-eras · 6 months ago

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A 1st For Friends

I've met a bunch of awesome through Tumblr. We connect over the love of hearts, but there are a few that you that I have more in common with. This is the heart of one of those people.

She slid into my DM's, not many females do, but we hit it off straight away. We bonded over our ADHD and how our stories were so similar. We shared the joys of meds (not) and RSD. But there was something about her heart that when she sent me recordings...without telling me I knew how she was feeling. My brain recognised the rhythms.. ones I had heard many times before in my own chest. That racing wasn't excitement...it was fight or flight nerves and that heart was gearing up for a battle. And that one was exhaustion, trying its best to slow down, but not being able to. It was great to be so in tune with someone so similar and amazing to have a new friend that just got me.

So where does this heart recording come from? Well...we all know that my heart is an attention hoe. She was feeling game but was too nervous to post herself, so I offered. This recording is actually the first one she sent me. I remember her being both so excited and nervous. Us ADHDers don't have slow hearts... we take stimulants, are mostly living with some sort of anxiety at all times, we're empaths and I feel like that makes our hearts more reactive... I remember the first time I posted my heart was beating so hard I thought it was going rip through my chest.. hearing this rec reminded me of that. The fear and the excitement and the adrenaline making her beat so hard it was the perfect way for her heart to say "Hello".

So I hope you enjoy her beats, I think they are just like mine... except no split.

#cardiophile #cardiophilia #female heartbeat #heartbeat #beating heart #pounding heart #stethoscope #fast heartbeat #heartbeats #female cardiophile

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fgfirenation · 3 months ago

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Aaaand I decided to explain myself over my last post from yesterday ( or early morning ), because I just can.

I'm not gonna @ the person, who made me grit my teeth from anger because while I'm a jackass, I'm not a complete one.

For now.

So let me set it straight for you all whining Arena people out there :

While I'm not familiar with Arena, I did research most of the lore with my bff.

And you know what?...

We prefer Journey's lore more than Arena's by a lot.

Now before you pull out your swords and guns at me, and start bitching, let me explain why :

I see that y'all are so attached to your Arena lore, but... COME ON!

That fucking thing is already 5-6 years old! A lot of the lore is ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE! ( Don't @ me. )

Like, grow tf up already! It was about time your lore from Arena had to change.

While it does seem really interesting, I almost had an aneurysm, while trying to understand it ( It's probably just me, but again, who tf knows- ).

A lot of lore things are probably so outdated, that it makes me want to shoot myself without a second thought.

I fully support Lilith Games for changing the lore, because they made it easier for the new players to consume it without somebody having FNAF lore insanity war flashbacks. ( Like me- ) And it feels like a breath of fresh air.

Worse changes have been made before by the writers. ( Gaius from Dislyte. I'm not forgiving you for this, Lilith Games. )

Also fuck you to whoever said that Lyca is a Mary-Sue! ( Yes, I'm holding a grudge now. What about it? )

Lyca is the last person I would ever dare to call a goddamn Mary-Sue. I've been in the Creepypasta fandom for already a fucking decade and when I tell you I have seen all sorts of Mary- and Gary-Sues from there FRONT TO BACK WITH ALL FLAVOURS OF MARY-SUE IN THE EXISTENCE OF HUMANITY!

If you want to call her this, go first to the Creepypasta fandom and witness wtf we were forced to see for years, and then come back to bitch at me. ( Actually don't, because I don't give a shit. Ok, maybe I do, because I'm a dick- )

Also fuck you for calling Lorsan annoying! This mf is the most ADHD little shit-coded thing with Berial, that I have ever seen in my entire life. So move on! He's absolutely adored by a good huge portion of the Journey players. Including me. I dare say he's a lot more boring in Arena than he'll ever be in Journey. I'll never manage to see him as a monk-type and calm character. My brain is short-circuiting, while trying to imagine this.

Also, I'm gonna be completely honest with you, I absolutely love Waves of Intrigue and Song of Strife. I absolutely adore Soren as a character and the ' Jinx and Vi from Arcane ' war flashbacks I got from Sonja and Nara-

Now for the endgame of my angry rant...

Did you really think that your fucking beloved Arena lore would stay the same?

Did y'all for real think it'll stay the same? Well, guess what :

If you did, then I'm sorry ( not sorry ) to tell you whining folks, THAT IT AIN'T GONNA STAY THE SAME!

You needed to see this coming from 2000 miles away, yet you somehow missed it entirely and of course it'll hit you in the face full force!

At this point, Idk if you expect absolute perfection from Lilith, good accurate lore, shitfarts or what else-not.

You change your opinions faster than a League of Legends player. I can't believe that I got angry over what's supposed to be a MOBILE GATCHA GAME! You managed to raise the rage bar for me more than Megamind 2!

I'm sorry to say this ( Everybody can express their opinions, duh- ), but you make absolutely some of the sorriest of excuses I've ever seen.

And I'm gonna quote the YouTuber Schaffrillas Productions for this :

' To the point that I think F-tier doesn't do this justice!

THIS SHIT BELONGS IN G-TIER! '

CONGRATULATIONS, YA ARENA LORE FOLKS!

And I'm gonna end it here before these people come after me and try to behead me.

What a fantastic way to come back to Tumblr after a year, right?

Bye!

#afk journey #afk rants #afk journey lore #angry raptor on the loose #angry ramblings #angry rants #afk arena

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scummy-writes · 4 months ago

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Things I've learned about being in fandoms on tumblr

Sometimes when I am navigating fandom, I will have bouts of... depression? negative feelings? regarding it. I think a lot of people go through this, but in the areas of fandom I buzz around in, I don't see many people talking about ways to sort of re-center yourself and take care of yourself in an online space. I thought I would attempt to share some of my habits I try to follow when I hit one of these moods. So here are 14 of them covering various subjects I run into the most. They will not work for everyone, but I do encourage you to think a bit about each point and see if it would work for you.

Feel free to add some of your own, but I am looking for positive advice that is not meant to put down others in a harmful way. I would also like to preface that I've been in fandoms for over seven years, most of them smaller rather than huge, but a lot of this advice is centered around someone just trying to enjoy the space/enjoying it as a fan creator (writing fanfics in my case). The 'you' used in this is a general usage of the word 'you'.

-> It's good to celebrate milestones, whether its how many followers you have, works you've made in a year, or similar.

However... Don't let this become a competition or reasons to compare yourself to others. We're here to have fun and to celebrate us doing so- don't put completely unneeded and unnessacary competition on it. What's the point of that competition other than to make yourself feel bad or to belittle others? This extends further to notes - no number games. none. You can be proud of the numbers you have gotten, but curb all impulses to swing that in a negative way. The second that starts happening, talk to friends. talk to someone IRL. do something that isn't staring at your notifs, immediately. Even if its listening to silly things while washing the dishes- get out of your notifs tab!!! The numbers game isn't a game you have to be a part of, ever.

-> Don't put other bloggers on pedestals.

It's fine to be a fan of someone's work, and to be excited when they post or even talk to you and you're surprised by it. However, we're all just nerds together in a fandom- maybe don't put them up on a pedestal and hold their opinions/words as gospel rather than things you agree with. There's an unhealthy disconnect there for both parties, and can lead to unhealthy habits of a bad comparison game with one party not even knowing you're comparing yourself or others to them. And I promise that no one likes being pitted against others in those.

-> separating my main blog from my fandom blog has done wonders for me.

This one is a lot more of a 'me' thing that MIGHT be helpful towards others, but it's such a nice thing to have a 'normal' space where I don't have to worry too much about fandomisms but want to be online. I want to reblog other things that are not just fandom related and I don't want people from the fandom blog bothering me for. For the longest time I wasn't very upfront with my main blog purely because I wanted that separation, but for others to block me properly I put it up more bluntly.

I also think that this is good when you want to write about some things, but are nervous. In my example, I get nervous writing about my ocs. So what did I do? Made a sideblog for one, briefly mentioned it, and I post untagged drabbles at times when trying to explore her character. It's more practice on not caring about the note amount each post gets for me, and it makes me more at ease with things not getting any notes while exploring different subjects I don't usually write about.

-> Does everyone seem horrible, or are you just not in a good mood?

This is silly and maybe redundant for some, but it's good to keep a track of IRL verses Online. If IRL is weighing you down so much that you use online as an unhealthy habit (self destructive behaviors towards things you worked hard on, lashing out at friends for things out of their control, lashing out on other bloggers for inane things, focusing your bad mood on notes or fake popularity contests...) then try and figure out the big important things: Have you eaten, slept, drank enough water through the day, or are in pain/annoyance with something offline that you're not realizing? Is it one person online making you feel like this? Have you blocked them? Have you taken healthy breaks offline to reground yourself? When i am randomly bitter about the online world, this is typically my frustrations with smth IRL leaking out, and so I do something to help process that or to breathe through it. My personal go to is getting out of the house so I can listen to music, watch silly videos while putting together a simple craft I bought, or doing chores/playing games.

-> Is the fandom full of cliques, or are you witnessing friends just talking to each other?

I get it, it fucking sucks not being involved in a friend group. You know what makes that worse? By looking at other's friend groups bitterly and making up shit in your mind to justify it. The reality is this: people will be friends with a limited number of people, and frequently talk to them because that is who they are comfortable with.

You not being in that friend group does not mean there is anything wrong with you OR them. The honest truth is that it's hard to keep up with a ton of friends at once, and so people may not respond to your messages, or they might mean to but it gets lost in their hectic IRL, or they just don't mesh with you- and all of that is normal!

And... Really... It takes work to build up a friend group. You have to get out of your comfort zone and send the first few messages. You have to embrace the fact that it's possible a friendship won't pan out. It's natural, it's normal, and doesn't mean there is anything wrong with you or the other person. After trying and naturally just talking to people in the fandom, I promise that you will find a friend group of your own.

We are all socially awkward people trying to nervously talk to each other. Yes, even the people you follow that seem like 'everyone' likes them- they are nervous too. we're all just nerds here, remember that.

-> Understand that no one is obligated to do anything.

This ranges from so many things. Here is a list as short as I can manage it to get my point across: No one is obligated to comment, read, like, or reblog any posts. Any posts. No one is obligated to scour for new creatives in the fandom spaces and reblog their work. No one is obligated to tag their posts/creative adventures to your liking. No one is obligated to follow by your DNIs and BYFs. Obligation does not exist. Even your friends are not obligated to do any of this.

It is courtesy to do these things. Blogs will do their best to be supportive by nature, and to try and at least do some of this at any given time, but it's not a requirement. It's NICE to do so and encouraged, but the second you drill it into your head that no one, not even you, are obligated to do this, it's a bit easier to breathe and accept that no, it's a bit insane and difficult to read through 50 fanfics a week and comment a paragraph on all of them while also working on your own things and trying to manage 15 conversations while working 40 hrs a week and and and---

Instead, focus that energy on friends and yourself when you can and accept your own limitations.

-> have other fandoms you enjoy where you DON'T feel pressured to do ANYTHING.

Due to my hard fixation at usually one to two games at a time, I am usually only writing for those at a time- but I need other things to enjoy where I don't feel like I need to make something to post online. I don't feel that pressure from myself, i don't feel the need to try and engage with others. Just a quiet enjoyment for me.

-> If creating is really stressing you out and making you feel worse than better, reflect on the reasons this may be.

Are you hanging out with people who are regurgitating really bad beliefs regarding creation ("shame, you only got twenty notes, that's nothing", "wow fifty notes? that flopped.", "how did this person's shitty work get 30 more notes than me?"). Are you getting anons putting you down? Is your depression convincing you what you've made is worthless? Look at some of the points in this post regarding friends, blocking, and if you're neglecting your body's needs. If that still persists, there may be some self-reflection as to why things get to you so badly. Try to journal out the reasons why until you believe you hit one that is not your depression speaking.

An example: I would freak out about notes because I had friends that would talk around or to me in the examples listed in the previous paragraph. Cutting them off, focusing on friends who focused on the joys of creating, and focusing more on what *I* wanted to write rather than requests... I still get depressed at times but it's been so much more managable now with better support and feeling free creatively. Usually calling myself out at staring at notes helps me shake my head and move on now.

-> Blocking/Filtering is your friend, but maybe don't over do it.

Blocking seems vaguely controversial at times, but I do believe it's needed for a positive fandom experience. Outside of the obvious, the reasons I block people are typically related to how upset I am by something the person has done or said, even if it's related to fancreations. If it's something like them berating others for not believing their headcanon/fanon? Or grossly demonizing some character's mental illness? Or harassing people who dislike some characters and vice/versa? That's all a block for me.

I personally try not to overdo it and make educated decisions based on like, hey, is this just someone misunderstanding and not realizing how they're coming off? Is this someone who I am misreading their tone? Is this just a weird one-off behavior? Ok, then maybe no block button. But if seeing poor takes makes you angry for longer than, say, 20 mins? an hour? It's a week later and you're still all huffy about it and legit pissed? Maybe dig into that while also blocking the person for now.

The Filters aspect of this is similar, but it's a lighter version of blocking for me. Maybe I don't want to block this person but seeing them talk about bugs really stresses me out, so I look at how they tag those posts and filter it out for myself. Maybe I love their fandom blog but they're multi-fandom, so i will filter out a fandom I don't want to see them post about. That's it.

-> Don't be afraid to cut anon off, even if it's for a few weeks at a time.

I feel like those of us who take requests for fan creations are terrified of this a lot, but truly, taking breaks from the anon function should be encouraged. It is indeed a button for shy people, but there are assholes everywhere regardless. When they occupy your time too much or just annoy you, take away their ability to actually say anything to you.

For a creative, sometimes this can feel like the end of the world. But... you Can turn it back on later. I frequently shut it off during major life events, fanfics I am worried I might get weird anons about, when I'm in a randomly bad mood and don't think I can handle it. I Sometimes have it off for months at a time. You can cut it back on. But if anons make you anxious just imagining getting one right now? Flip that off for now. (also please utilize the block function for mean anons!!!)

-> turn those tumblr notifs OFF!!! (mobile) Additional: Turn your status OFF!!!

The only notifications I get on my phone from tumblr is when someone IM's me, and I've had it like this for years. I cannot imagine having my phone constantly going off with random tumblr notifications, I think I would have a bad spike in anxiety having that happen. It would make any negative feelings with notes/followers/number worse for me.

The online status is debatable, some people really don't have an issue with this, but I tend to feel pressured to respond to people asap if they see that my status is online and similar. Those people have not said anything to me regarding it, it's just my personal issue. So..I turn that status off. And it helps me feel better about answering in my own time.

-> Look at who you are communicating with.

Do your friends regularly dunk or mock people on the daily, over shit that is inane and petty? Are you a creative a bit nervous with your work because your friends are pretty rude with how they view other's works? Are you scared to like a character because your friend severely hates them/is attached to them to an unhealthy degree?

There are other subsets to this, but those are ones I find really troubling and try my best to avoid. I dont want to be friends with people who regularly mock others on the legit daily. I don't want to be friends with people who nitpick notes and use notes as a measure on how much worth someone has. I don't want to be friends with people who mock other's creative endeavors.

So... I don't! If I notice things are becoming a salt pit, I try to talk things out at first, but if its clear that's not gonna work, then it's outties for me. It's very true that everyone will salt over something eventually, but it's up to you to decide how severe it is with your friend circle, how it wears you down, and are they really people you want to hang around with if they just make you anxious or stressed all the time?

-> That vaguepost isn't about you.

Friend venting about someone who sounds oddly like you? Does your favorite blog mention something they dislike and you think you fit into that catagory- guess what. It's not about you!!

It's something I struggled with for a while, but eventually I came to terms with it by going "If they truly have an issue with me, they can talk to me one on one. Otherwise, i am assuming that this isn't about me" and gritting my teeth and forcing myself to repeat that until I feel at ease. Truthfully, I also just stopped hanging out with people who do this a ton in a harmful way, so my anxiety about this decreased. If it's an issue, friends should be willing to bring it up to you personally rather than make really meanspirited vagueposts.

-> A personal one I am putting at the end since I believe can easily turn bad, is... Stop looking in the fandom tags if they continiously bum you out.

I will be transparent, I've had bouts of running into a ton of 'why you should love/hate this character' posts over and over, posts that are random but use 50 different character tags, posts about how annoying my fave is, posts from/about bloggers I dislike, etc etc. After a while, I decided to just curate my feed via whoever I was following, and stop looking into tags as often. At most, I do it once every 1-3 months.

Yes, this does limit what all you can see, however... There's only so much information I can take in at once. If I follow people who reblog a ton of fandom content I love and it's different across the board, that's good enough for me and I don't feel negative looking at the tags sometimes.

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mariii1 · 1 year ago

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(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Who's Coming Towards You? (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

TUMBLR FINALLY ADDED READ MORE ON THE APPP anyway sorry for the delay I went to Portugal then got all my wisdom teeth removed AND im sick 😣🦷 Regardlesss im here and i might do a mini tarot game since I reached 400 FOLLOWRRS 😱but yeah we'll seeee, have fun wit this pac thoo 😜

1-If you're currently dating around or on dating sites, a fuckboy is coming towards you. They may not present as one, but they are. At first, you might think that this person knows what direction they're taking their life in or that they're just very driven in general. But this is just a facade that they put in order to lure girls in. They want a situationship and the don't want commitment. Even if you're not dating or looking to date, this is somebody who might try to ask you out, but it's kind of obvious that they only want kewchie. This could happen during your job, it could be a coworker or customer/client. They could try to hit on you and act like they're super deep or they genuinely want to know about you. There will be very wishy washy when it comes to their intentions, they don't like giving the straight answers.

2- Speed drive by Charli XCX. You might be in a Barbie/girlboss energy. What's coming towards you is some sort of opportunity. If you felt had you had a bunch of options you felt neutral about, youll have another one and I see you going straight for that. This one is really going to stand out to you and I see you when this opportunity is finally offered you're not gonna be hesitant any more and you're gonna be able to make up your mind. Specifically if you been waiting to hear back from somebody, you're going to hear back from them very soon, and it's going to help a lot.

3- So like the pile above clarity is coming towards you. This could be about a specific person, but I'm specifically getting a situation. There could have been some sort of drama in your life and you didn't know which side to take. There could have been a lot of stories and rumors involved. This could have been something really serious that affected you or somebody else financially. I'm getting that this has to do with somebody who's close to you or at least has some sort of influence on you directly or indirectly. You may have had to go to court, had to look up laws or contact a lawyer. But I'm seeing some sort of clarity not a final decision but just some sort of clarity. I think you might find the right lawyer for you if that's what you're supposed to specifically looking for. If not, I still feel like this heavily has to do with finances. Even if you are seeking out something romantically, maybe you want a sugar daddy, you're going to find someone who's going to help you in which you exchange some sort of money with them.

4- the number 4 could be important for you maybe you keep seeing it everywhere or you keep choosing pile 4 in pick a cards. Apply it to your situation but im predominantly gettting that someone you wanted or liked is coming toward you. I think you're still attracted to this person. For some, you could have felt dejected by this person even if they didn't outright reject you. You'll be surprised by how thoughtful they come across when they come towards you and I think they've been thinking about you for awhile. This is someone you've had a crush or attraction to for a minute. Your dreams of dating them will be reborn and may actually happen this time.

5 - HEY BIG SPENDEEEERRR the moment you walked in the joint, I could tell you were a man if distinction a real big spender.... Loveeee that scene from that movie (Sweet Charity). Okay so a few scenarios this could be somebody that presents like they have a lot of money or they could present like they're going to give you a lot of money even if they don't seem to have a lot. But I'm getting you're going to find out that they are broke very quickly and the only thing they have is dick to offer which doesn't pay bills. They probably fought for your attention and this may be somebody who glorifies struggle love. I'm getting they could actually be rich, but they're very stingy. And possibly after fighting for your attention they'll probably ghost you or just go to other people who aren't as naive. A lot of you could be sex workers and specifically getting strippers and this is just another man at the club trying to act like hes some sort of crypto mogul. If not, maybe you're on dating apps, and this is something that might happen.

6- Ooop so apparently this is my pile. I NEED A HERO I'M HOLDING ON FOR A HERO 'til the end of the night and he's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight..... Anyway this is someone who presents as a fuck boy but in reality, they're just a normal person. So I feel like this is a misconception you're going to have about them when they genuinely have good intentions. I think this person will sort come as some sort of hero in your life. This could come in the form of them giving you a financial opportunity. However, I feel like for most of you they're going to help you financially or be a co-worker that's really helpful. They could give you a really good idea for something financially. Even if you're in school, they could present some sort of job opportunity to you. I think they could also be good to you in general. But at the end of the day, you might actually end up sucking their dick fr like literally HAHAHA I don't think it will be a bad thing. Yeah, you might think that they're coming to ruin your life, but they're really not. Aka opposite of pile 5 🤭.

#pick a card #tarot #pick a pile #queer tarot #pac #tarot reading

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strawburry01 · 8 months ago

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Pinball Wizard

Summary: Soft lil one shot of you and your boyfriend Angus playing pinball

AN: Fluffy fluff and chill stuff sorry I'm all over the place, but life sometimes be life-ing for the good and the bad. I had someone over and left tumblr open and when I tell you I've never lunged across the room faster to shut a screen....

You stood over a pinball machine, brow furrowed in frustration as the ball once again slid right through the middle of the two paddles. You swore under your breath and hit glass, losing another dollar to the machine. You were waiting for your boyfriend Angus to meet you here after his exam, trying to take his mind off however he scored. Unfortunately you had not planned for him to take so long- or for you to lose so many quarters in the process. You sipped on your bottle of Coke as you leered at the machine, as if it would do anything. Angus was the one who was good at these sorts of things, and you swore he was somehow rigging it everytime. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t sort of into it though watching how serious he got when he leaned over the machine, usually crossing one leg behind the other to get optimal positioning. Ever since you convinced him to start wearing accessories like your rings and necklaces sometimes he’d become a lot more confident in his looks. He always was adjusting his coat sleeves or collar just so people noticed. You’d heard about his time before college and knew he had always been stuck around pretty pretentious people- going to one of those schools where he needed to wear the same uniform as everyone and go to mass everyday twice a day. Personally you would’ve set the place on fire, but he always lied and said he was an angel of a student, to which you would always punch his arm at. College was different, college was better. You were studying chemistry and working a few lab jobs around campus, mostly cleaning beakers and pipetting for hours on end, and he was studying history, working to become a professor eventually. He always said he wanted to teach at Yale or some other Ivy League, but you could see him being a good high school teacher. You’d broached the idea to him once when you were both high and talking about the future, but he got quiet and ended it by saying he’d never be as good as his history teacher.

Some kid next to you shrieked, snapping you out of your thoughts.

“Hey hon,” Angus said, appearing next to you, plucking your bottle out of your hand and taking a sip. The circles under his eyes were darker and his voice was tired.

“Exam went that good huh?” you asked as you watched him finish the bottle of soda. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and sighed as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you close, setting his head on top of ours.

“What gave it away?” he gently laughed, feeling his chest rumble under your cheek as you squeezed him back. He smelled like old weathered books and cigarette smoke. He pressed his lips to your forehead before breaking away and running a hand through his mess of curly hair. “Alright give me some quarters I need to forget that essay,” he said with a small smirk as he tried to reach into your jean jacket pocket for quarters. He grabbed a handful of coins from your pocket and spun to the pinball machine you’d been opposing for the last few rounds.

“Good luck with that one babe,” you grumbled as you moved to the right side of the machine, leaning against the wall with your hands tucked behind the small of your back. Angus laughed looking down at the lit up board.

“We’ll see about that,” he quipped, the blinking lights of the game lighting up the features of his face. You can only watch in silence as he somehow expertly flicks the bumpers racking up 100’s, 1,000’s, eventually 1,000,000’s of points.

“How are you so good at this?” you asked from the sidelines, shaking your head.

“I’m good with my fingers?” he answered without missing a beat or looking away from the game, to which you responded with a gentle smack to the back of his head. He only smirked. “Hey you would know right?” he added, finally drawing his eyes to meet yours.

“Oh shut it Tully,” you sneered as you pushed yourself off the wall to go get another Coke. Before you could get far you felt his hand wrap around your waist and pull you back. He nestled you right between himself and the machine, holding his hands over yours on the sides, resting his chin on your shoulder.

“You’re going to make me lose the game Y/N,” he mumbled into your ear, still laser focused on the game, pressing your fingers in to hit the bumpers for him.

“What if I throw the game for you?” you threatened, hitting the bumpers with your own volition a few times before the ball reached the bottom again. Angus took the second to pinch your hip which caused you to yelp.

“I suggest you don’t try it,”. You smiled to yourself as you settled back, leaning back into his chest as you felt his arms reach out over your own to continue playing, “good girl,” he murmured into your ear as he quickly pecked your cheek as he continued to play.

The fact that this was your life now- the fact that the nerd that sat in the back of the ancient Roman civilizations class was now wrapped around you- STILL more focused on a damn pinball game than you-

“High score,” he muttered under his breath as the screen in front flashed yellow and blue. Sure enough somehow he had really just gotten the high score.

“Good job babe,” you laughed as he flicked through the letters to spell out your name on the scoreboard.

“Couldn’t have done it without my lucky charm,” he smiled as he placed a kiss on the top of your shoulder before pushing back from the machine and stretching his arms above his head, lifting up the hem of his shirt in the process. Your eyes couldn’t help but wander down to his exposed midsection, a small bit of his tattoo peaking out, “enjoying the view?” he asked as he caught you in the act. You felt your face go red as you tried to open your mouth to defend your way out of this one, but you knew it was hopeless.

He smirked and pulled you in by the belt loops until you were chest to chest with him, wrapping your arms behind the back of his neck. He was a strong proponent of PDA, and you for once didn’t mind it in a relationship.

“Think I can get lucky again tonight?” he said as his lips brushed yours. You pushed onto the toes of your shoes and kissed his lips, leaving him wanting more as you sunk back down. You slid your hand on top of his jeans, touching his skin under his shirt causing him to suck air in with anticipation.

“I think it’s both of us getting lucky,”.

#angus tully #angus tully x reader #dominic sessa #college au #the holdovers

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kervetkaparanoid · 10 days ago

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This year tearfully and tensely tried to draw backgrounds

maybe the most of you like it all, but i personally can't say that I'm content with the results, I still have a lot to learn. The real problem is that i don't have mental resource for learning, for drawing the so-called study-artworks. As i have said, I feel like a sour battery that can't work adequately and heats up wildly at the slightest effort.

Maybe I'm just making excuses that way. I don't know if I can't or don't want to do anything, or maybe it's all together

Besides somewhere in the middle of the year my ability to analyze... has gone awry, Idfk, and because of it when I look at my works in progress for me they become disproportionate, with dirty render, weird shadows, glares and so on And I get pretty upset about it

Also I never ventured to start actually take commissions adequately or at the very least to sell out the RW sticker packs stack that I have had since last year. Overall since the beginning of this year I only wanted to close myself off more and to not contact people any more than necessary, only rarely crossing paths with my close friends in chats and games. I am afraid of people and society and I am dejected about the fact that the time that I can live at my kinfolk's expense will be at it's end sooner or later, and I will never be ready to live on my own

alright, aside from my snotty mental splash

Of the positives in my art, I can still sort of praise myself for at least some improvements in the proportions of characters, there certainly were some artworks that I liked and that appealed new people, which warms my soul. My Tumblr hit it's first thousand, a good number of people also came to VK, even thought in the end I decided to leave that... creation

there were a few co-ops that I have unedited and maybe one day I will draw previews for them and will upload them on youtube so that people could laugh and get scared by my unstable voice, which at one particular moment ruptures the eardrums (I apologize for that)

Even despite the lack of snow outside the window, there is still an awe of the new year holidays and decorating my apartment and the christmas tree inside me. My inner child is still alive, as long as I am alive myself.

But I am also frightened by the sudden speed-up of time and, in general, by future years that seem to bring less and less positive things and more and more destruction, forbiddance, rot, bile and other excretions.

All in all, thank you for being here, following my art, writing kind words or just watching.

i am glad to be walking this path with you

i really hope that the future doesn't consist of radioactive ruins

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pinayelf · 24 days ago

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just need a venty vent this isn't meant to make anyone feel bad I've just been having lots of feelings and I don't have anywhere to put them

this is prob seasonal depression hitting + exhaustion from being a retail worker but I'm just sad

I'm sad I feel guilty for liking veilguard, a game I was looking forward to as an escape during a holiday that I knew I was gonna be stressful bc I work retail now

now I feel like I can't even use it as an escape bc even tho I'm having fun I feel morally wrong/stupid for enjoying it

I'm sad my friends/circle don't like it bc I have no one to be excited about and blab about my oc and davrin with. and me being one of the few ppl who like it outside ppl I care about and love makes me feel like there is something wrong w me

I'm sad that the reception of the game is this bc the community feels is sad and upset and I have been so looking forward to it for real and there's no one to blame but bi/oware and ea

I'll get over it I've just been feeling tired and emotional, I just got home from work and tumblr hasn't approved my community yet and I sort of hoped by the time I got home they would

anyway that's that on that sorry if I made anyone feel bad. I need mayhaps vitamin d pills and sweet and sour shrimp and for the sun to stay out longer

#negative feelings cw

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taytrashmouth · 1 year ago

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Request: Hiiii first comment on tumblr EVER…I really love 19 and 14..with peeta would be so cute (I’m in a peeta chokehold rn..) I LOVR YOUR WRITINGS SO MUCH I CANT GET ENOUGH💕💕💕🙏🙏🙏 -@bigbootysniffer

Prompt 14: slow dancing by a fire

Prompt 19: person B is insecure about their scars and person A makes them feel better about it

This is adorable, I’m so in love with this request!!! Hope you like it!!!! Thanks so much for all your kind words it really means a lot to me ❤️❤️

Requests are open so please send them in!!!!

Peeta x reader. Set during mockingjay after Peeta is rescued from the capitol.

It had been a rough few weeks. First you lost Peeta, which made you pretty unbearable to be around. Then you saw him on TV saying all those things, using words that weren’t his.

Coin had to lock you in your room when they went to rescue him. When they finally did let you see him, you ignored everyone’s warnings including snows. He tried to kill you which was hard to deal with.

Two weeks later and no real developments had been made in the rebellion and they finally let you be alone with Peeta for an hour. You sat in the fake garden in the base of district 13.

And watched as the guards escorted him over to you. He didn’t look like himself. Thin and covered in bruises.

“Call us if you need to.” One of the guards handed you a buzzer. You nodded.

Peeta sat down on the picnic blanket next to you. You felt nervous around him. Which made you want to cry, you were scared of Peeta.

“Hey.” You smiled.

“Hi.” He didn’t look like he wanted to be here.

“I got your favourite bread. And orange soda.” You showed him.

He just stared. “I can’t remember what’s real and what’s not.” He spoke just above a whisper. He sounded so depressed.

You thought for a moment before answering. “Ask me.”

“Green is your favourite colour. Real or not real?” He stared at you.

“Real. Yours is orange, like the sunset.” You smiled at him.

He almost looked relieved. He sort of smiled and took a sip of the soda. His colour.

“I missed you.” Tears filled your eyes.

He looked at his lap. He couldn’t say the same thing. Still confused as to why he believed you wanted to kill Him.

“You used to make me bread like this all the time. It was my favorite part of the week. Not because i liked the bread, that was just a bonus, but because I got to see you.” You spoke, trying to break the tension.

You tore a piece of bread off the loaf and hit it in your mouth.

“I threw bread at you.” He spoke.

“I was starving, you saved me.” You assured him.

“I burnt it on purpose. And my mother beat me for it. If I didn’t care about you I would’ve had a lot less suffering.”

Tears filled your eyes and regret washed over his face.

“It’s all fuzzy. I’m sorry.” He began to cry, holding his head. He repeated that he was sorry until you held him and he slowly hugged you back.

“It’s okay. I’ll help you remember.” You assured him and brushed some hair off his forehead.

“Thank you.” He half smiled.

You just nodded.

“You want to hurt me. Real or not real.” He wiped a tear off his cheek.

“Not real. I swear.”

He nodded as if telling himself it was okay.

“I couldn’t hurt you even if I wanted to. You’ve always been there for me. With the bread. At the Capitol, in the games, back in 12. Always. The only time I ever saw you hurt anything or anyone was to protect me. You are the sweetest person I know.” You squeezed his hand.

He smiled a little wider now, like he was more sure of himself now.

“I love you…real or not real?” He asked again.

“You never said it to me. But I like to think that you did. You showed it. The way you protected me, the way you kissed me, the small things. You planted daisy’s in my front yard because i mentioned I like the smell. You Gave me a pearl in the games…I hold it when I’m scared and when I was missing you.”

“Do you love me?” He asked simply.

You hesitated for a moment. “Yes. So much. I wish I could explain how much I love you but I don’t have the words to describe it. You’re my favorite person in the whole world.” You were teary.

Very carefully he held your cheek. And kissed you gently. You smiled into the kiss. It was over too soon.

“I think I love you too.” Peeta told you.

That was enough for you. You almost laughed in relief.

“That’s good.” You giggled.

You spent the next 2 hours talking, no guards ever came to get him.

You walked with him to his room, and as you said goodnight, and turned to leave he spoke up.

“Stay,”

“Okay.” You smiled.

He gave you a shirt of his to sleep in and it swallowed you whole. You were sure he would also drown in it after losing so much weight.

He hesitated after watching you lie down on his bed.

“What’s wrong?” You asked.

He fiddled with the hem of his shirt. You immediately knew he was scared to show you his body.

“I’ll close me eyes.” You told him and you did.

You heard some shuffling and then after a minute or two he asked you to open your eyes.

His bare chest was shocking. Scars and bruises littered his body, weeks after returning. You could see his ribs.

Tears filled your eyes and your hands came to your face.

“They don’t hurt anymore.” He told you.

“Are you sure?” You asked sadly gesturing for him to climb into bed.

He did. “Some are worse than others.”

“You’re perfect. I hope you know that. The scars just prove how strong you are. What you’ve gone through but didn’t deserve. I love you Peeta.” You told him and put your head on his bare chest.

“Thank you.” He was teary too. “I love you n/n.” You smiled through some tears. It was an old nickname that you hadn’t heard for months.

He was remembering.

You were inseparable the next few weeks. Despite Peeta having a few episodes or panic attacks he was doing much better. You were always there to calm him.

You sat with him at Finnick and Annie’s wedding.

“You’re beautiful.” He told you. You smiled, Effie had picked out your dress and to your surprise it wasn’t over the top.

“Do you wanna dance?” You asked with a smile.

“I don’t know if I know how.” He replied.

“You do.” You smiled remembering the victors tour. “But I’ll teach you if you don’t remember.”

He picked it up quickly. Your hands around his neck, his on your waist. You swayed to the music, occasionally spinning or clapping.

He was yours again. Peeta was back. You smiled as he kissed your head.

#peeta supremacy #peeta mellark x reader fluff #peeta mellark x reader #peeta x reader #y/n #the hunger games peeta #peeta mellark #thg peeta #i love peeta #team peeta #peeta my beloved #thg series #thg fanfiction #thg #the hunger games

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pumpkinsplots · 1 year ago

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Writeblr Intro

Hello, writeblr! I finally caved and got tumblr, mostly because I love rambling about my wips and hearing other people ramble about theirs and all of that lovely stuff, so this seemed like a great platform to do that. With that being said, I plan on posting about my wips and ocs, as well as art related to those things, so if that interests you at all, I’d love to see you stick around. Also feel free to call me either Pumpkin or Maria, it’s entirely up to you!

About my writing

I’ve found that I really enjoy writing in a variety of genres, so hopefully at least one of my wips will tickle your fancy. Though I’d say a common thing for me is that I really like to world build, so my wips tend to be sci-fi, fantasy, or magical realism of some variety. Anything where I can put my own spin on the setting is something I’m bound to enjoy writing about.

I write in third person, usually with multiple povs, and I really enjoy character driven stories.

I often like to have a wide variety of ages in the cast, and if I had to pick a favorite trope it would be found family, so that’s usually present to some degree in my stuff.

Tonally, I always include light-hearted moments here and there, even if the wip is very bleak. It provides some levity, and I think it makes the painful stuff hit a lot harder. This is probably partially why I put some thought into each character’s sense of humor.

Most of my wips are geared towards older teens and adults, but I’ll get more into content warnings when I talk about each individually, because it really varies.

I’m one of those writers that kills off a lot of characters, so this is your warning not to get attached /j

I’m demisexual, so at least one character being on the ace spectrum is like a requirement for me at this point.

I’m a plantser, and pretty bad at staying motivated to actually finish first drafts.

About my wips

Falling Up

Falling Up is a sci-if story set in the future where Earth is a utopia where inhabitants experience little to no hardships throughout their lives. The deceased are replaced with AI created to replicate them, and everything is automated to the point where people no longer need to work to make a living. This lack of struggle results in dull, perfect lives and skewed morals. The people crave entertainment, even if it means making others suffer for it. Quasdom, a miniature man made planet initially intended to be used to separate deviants from the rest of the perfect society, is used as a catalyst for entertainment. The people of Quasdom believe that those on Earth are superior to them, and that Earth is a place where any wish can come true. This leads to the tourney, a death game between groups of ten on Quasdom, being viewed similarly to winning the lottery. The winning team gets to go to Earth, after all. Being chosen for the tourney is the luckiest thing that can happen to you. There’s no hard feelings between participants, death is completely painless, and the afterlife will welcome any participants to a better life than they previously had. There’s nothing to fear, so smile and put on a show.

A large cast and lots of character deaths

An exploration of why we get so attached to fictional characters, and how fiction can have an impact on reality

Probably going to be a trilogy

Content warnings include language, some unsettling themes, depictions of mental health issues, and generally things that are more psychological. Despite it being a death game, there’s no gore, like at all. The people on Earth may be desensitized, but they aren’t accustomed to seeing blood, so the tourney is designed with that in mind

Facade

Facade is set in a world where the living world and the spirit world coexist. Due to some actions by the main antagonist, about 20 years prior to the current story, spirits started getting aggressive and sort of going haywire. They possess any person they can, turning the individual into an uncontrollable killing machine. The best defense to this was the invention of a certain kind of mask that prevents possession, and masks quickly became widespread. Since there’s no known way to reverse spiritual possession, the only solution is to kill those that are unfortunate enough to meet that fate. A group led by an anonymous vigilante known as K9 seek to find a way to reverse possession. Many enemies are made along the way, and there are countless obstacles to face.

Its setting is based on Singapore and set in the 90s, though there are many creative liberties taken

The wip is currently pretty no plot just vibes

Themes about individuality vs equality

Content warnings include language and some sexual content

Facade: After Dark

While Facade is currently no plot just vibes, developing the characters led to me thinking of the plot for a prequel. Is it a self-indulgent novella about two of the characters I love? Yes, absolutely. In summary, it’s a romance novella about the the relationship of Leijing and Iris, and their struggles in navigating the wild world of Facade. They have vastly different upbringings and experiences, but their differences bring them together in more ways than one.

I have so much backstory for this pre-established couple and I couldn’t think of a good way to incorporate it into the main story without cutting a bunch of it, so boom it’s a prequel now

I’ve found that working on a wip that’s more low stakes and simple is really fun—I tend to get stressed about my more ambitious plots, so this wip is a great change of pace

Leijing is demisexual with little interest in anything sex related and Iris is an omnisexual sex worker, and the story explores how a world obsessed with all things sex can effect both more sex-negative and sex-positive people

Content warnings include language, explicit sexual content, and potentially triggering subject matters. This is my only wip where it’s strictly 18+!

Lights Out

Sunlight is the essence of life. Without it, the world would wither away. However, a dangerous new life form of unknown origin festers in the light. With long, elegant glimmering limbs, high intelligence, picturesque precision, and a craving for flesh, these organisms pose a major threat to humanity. But for some odd reason, these creatures refuse to step into any area where the sun doesn’t touch. Much of humanity takes to the shadows, building elaborate underground tunnels for civilizations and doing what humans do best—using their resources and ingenuity to adapt.

Has two protagonists that butt heads but start to develop a father daughter dynamic. A young adult girl who’s from the underground and unknowingly part of a cult, and an older man with one leg who’s so stubborn he’d rather fight and die than flee to the darkness

Lots of creepy cult imagery and themes about religious trauma

So much banter of course

Content warnings include language, disturbing imagery, and gore

If you’ve made it this far, thanks for reading! Asks, comments, tag games, and messages are always appreciated, and I’d love to hear about your wips as well!

#writeblr #writeblr intro #writing #writeblr introduction #creative writing #writers of tumblr #new writeblr #writer #writeblr search #new to writeblr #writers on tumblr

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