#i feel like i needed to post this so. sorry. if this runs your day or life or something
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five (m. fushiguro x gn!reader)
five seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and years of you through megumi fushiguroâs eyes. wc: 1.1k || tags/cw: spoilers for end of jjk manga, reader is a first-year along with the main trio, reader was abandoned as a child and raised by utahime, megumi is bad at feelings, hurt/comfort (i mean this is jjk after all), bad pacing which i will attribute to time not being real, is it obvious i don't read read the manga a/n: first jjk post! late birthday oneshot sorry i wrote for tobio kageyama first >:)
five seconds is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to register that thereâs a new student in the class.
no, not itadori or kugisaki, but yet another new student, a transfer from the kyoto school. youâre cheerful enough, and you seem to be pretty powerful. he can tell that much from the way you carry yourself, and the aura of cursed energy radiating from you.Â
gojo introduces you to the class. megumi likes the way your name sounds.
---
five minutes is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to find that youâre actually really smart.
youâre assigned to sit beside him during lessons, much to the dismay of his other two friends. you give him a little smile, and he tries to smile back, hoping it doesn't look like a grimace.Â
gojo asks a question about the three great vengeful spirits of japan. michizane no sugawara, taira no masakado and emperor sutoku. the information comes to the forefront of his mind without him needing to really think about it too much. he opens his mouth, ready as usual to be the only one in the class who knows it -
until he hears you say the answer confidently.
the other two are stunned into silence, and so is he. you look over at their shocked faces, and offer them a bashful grin, like you're embarrassed.
---
five hours is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to realise he wants to get to know you more.
accompanied by itadori and kugisaki, he comes knocking at the door of your dorm room after school. he finds himself a little lost for words when you answer the door. you look even better out of uniform, and the comfortable clothes you wear complement your skin tone and eyes.Â
mumbling something about showing you around the campus, he's glad when kugisaki diverts your attention away from him. he doesnât miss the knowing wink she shoots him, though, and just grumbles and diverts his gaze.
---
five days is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to look forward to seeing you.
itâs only your first week at tokyo jujutsu high, and already he feels some sort of connection to you. you were abandoned as a child, raised by sorcerer and teacher utahime iori from the kyoto campus for a few years. it reminds him of how gojo took him in after his own father left, and it brings the two of you closer together.
you trade stories about your unconventional childhoods. living in the dorms, training in cursed energy control and combat from a young age, the things youâve been through to get to where you are today. you tell him that youâre happy your experiences made you who you are, and that theyâve brought you to him.
he savours this moment more than he cares to let on.
---
five weeks is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to feel as if heâs known you forever.
youâre with him 24/7 at this point. you go on morning runs with him and itadori before you meet a sleepy kugisaki for breakfast in the common area. you have classes together. you spar with the second-years - none of you ever win, but you come pretty close sometimes. you go on missions together.Â
when itadori dies, you grieve with him, but you don't cry. when kugisaki falls asleep on his bed, and when youâre about to doze off in his arms, he cups your face in his hands and holds you close, feeling your warmth, even as he holds back tears of his own.
and when itadori pops out of a box revealing heâs been alive for the past few weeks, you join megumi and kugisaki in rolling your eyes to conceal your happiness.
---
five months is the amount of time it takes for megumi fushiguro to know he wants you in his life for the rest of it.
âas long as she has unshakable character, i wonât ask for more,â he remembers saying to todo once.
and of course heâs thinking about you when he says this.
who else could it be?
---
in the end, five years is the amount of time megumi fushiguro has to wait before he finally, truly tells you how he feels.
being trapped in his own body was not so much of a nightmare, but a trance. a trance in which memories and dreams and nightmares and hopes coagulated into a single stream of thoughts. his worst fears come to life. an unlikely happy ending. the faces of those he loves most. your face seems to pop up most.
truly one of the most unique and unfortunate ways to find out he loves someone.
he spends what feels like eternity in the darkness with you. you speak to him when he cannot muster the strength to even open his mouth, soothe him when he cannot think.
the memories of you and his loved ones are what keeps him alive.
he sees you cry for the first time when he is reunited with everyone else. heâs crying too. youâve gone through terrible things, all of you. youâve all lost those you care about most, and megumi doesnât know if any of you will ever be okay. whether itâll ever be okay. but looking at you, teary eyes fixated on gojoâs parting letter to you, he gets the sense that it will.
he embraces you, and he doesnât even have to say anything to tell you he loves you.
a year turns into two. two into three. three into four. miraculously youâre still by his side, unyielding in the face of whatever curses or calamities the world throws at you. one spring day, megumi holds your hand as you sit under the sakura trees, watching the petals drift off in the breeze. and he knows he must tell you now.Â
he looks at you, your smile brighter than any light heâs ever known, and finally speaks the words heâs held for so long.
âi love you.â
you turn to him, eyes shimmering with the same certainty he feels.
âiâve always loved you, megumi.â
five is the number of times he kisses you under the sakura trees that spring day. five is the number of first-year students you co-teach with him, who make fun of him for being all lovey-dovey with you. five is the number of deep blue roses he leaves in a vase by your bedside every week.
and, just as straightforward as he is, five is the number of sentences in his wedding vows to you.
jjk masterlist || general masterlist
© sirhamburrger 2024
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jujutsu kaisen oneshot#jjk oneshot#jjk x reader#jjk x you#megumi fushiguro#fushiguro megumi#megumi jjk#megumi x reader#megumi x you#kai writes
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â yummy in my tummy â
part three
a/n i've been following the halloween event pretty closely for the jp servers, and omg, i have fallen deeper in love with leona! he's just so gentlemanly and honestly, the type of guy you would totally bring home to meet ur parents! plus he looks so damn good! also scully such a cutie patootie! love his little mannerisms and design! i was a little sad that ace and deuce wasn't in, but that just means that they'll both be there for the next halloween event!
edit: so this was meant to be posted like a long time ago hence my og author note, but better late the. never ig. but my point still stands that skully is a little cutie patootie <3
included ignihyde, diasomnia + rollo
tw nothing
want more? here's part one + two
ignihyde <3
â He canât help it! But the first thing that escape Idia's mouth is âIs this poison?â He can't help it! Heâs just a little awkward and has low self-esteem! Idia canât phantom the idea that anyone, especially you, would take time out of their day to make and bring little, ugly him, food. (his words not mine) Itâs literally a ten minute conversation where you have to explain to him that you wanted to this because you care about his skinny ass. And after he gets that through his thick ass head and into his big ass brain, does he explode into hot, hot red. Despite being a literal genius, Idiaâs social department (self-esteem? self-love?) is severely understaffed. I donât think Idiaâs all that picky when it comes to food, heâs just not used to eating food out of his comfort zone. But batting your pretty eyes and asking âpretty please?â is enough to get him to bend over.
â If he could eat, Ortho would adore your food! (real talk, i canât remember if Ortho could canonically eat through like idk a food cavity space thing or if i had just read that from a fic) Would ask for all types of things. But since he canât, Ortho enjoys your food through Idia. Heâs really happy that someone would take the time out of their day just for his big brother. By his data, doesnât that mean you like his big bro? In all sorts of media, romantic partners make each other food to show their love! If Idia wasnât such a danger magnetic in the kitchen, Ortho would force Idia to make you food too! So youâll just have to settle with Ortho as your little helper instead. (heâs so excited to spend one on one time with his future in-law! teehee)
Diasomnia <3
â My, make him food? How courageous you are, little human. Malleus gobbles your food down like it's his last supper. Food created by his child of man? How could he possibly let it go to waste! Compliments you to the moon and back. Though because it is Malleus, he does slip a few critiques. (he canât help it! Heâs a prince afterall) Malleus has never had an edible homemade dish full of love given to him, like ever. (sorry lilia, your food is full of love, just not edible) A warm feeling blossoms all across his body like blooming roses. If his tail was out, it would be swaying to the beat of his racing heart. Malleus didnât think it was possible to fall deeper in love with you, but here you go, always surprising him. Perhaps, youâll find a meal on your desk one day by the initials M.D.
â Ohohoho? So you want to challenge a culinary master! Lilia will not be beaten by such a cute little human! You better start running tehehehehe- On another less scary note, Lilia enjoys your food immensely! Of course he could think of a few ways to make it much more protein packed and nutritious but thatâs just his inner master chef coming out teehee. Beware, he insists that you must try his cooking, itâs only fair of him to treat you to a meal. Or even worse, insist that you too must cook together. Pray to the seven (or hope that Silver will be conscious enough to drag his father outta there) because youâre going to need it.
â Wonderful⊠is the only word Silver is able to get out before he falls asleep. When he wakes, Silver is awfully embarrassed. Silver is blown away at your kindness. His face a perment baby pink the rest of the day. You thought of him and no one else. Surely this must mean something right? Still, Silver must do something for you too. Itâs only fair. (what a sweet gentleman) he considers making you a treat as well, but considers otherwise. It might be unwise to be in the kitchen with his condition. But of course, itâs not like Silver wonât have any help! All the woodland creatures are more than happy to help Silver win over his crushâs heart! The next day youâll have his treat flown to you by a couple of blue birds, chipmunks and rabbits gathering at your door with berries of all sorts. Silver thankful for such generous companions. If he had to face you, he might just fall into a coma.
â He canât help it when he says, âAre you trying to poison me?!â and âDonât you dare poison my Waka-Sama! I will fight you, human!â Sebekâs like a dog, barking and barking, until he smells the delicious scent of your food and suddenly, heâs stubbornly eating it at the table. Cursing himself for being so weak to delicious food (and your pretty smile) Oh how could he properly serve his Waka-sama if heâs weakened by such things?! THE CRUELTY! He does really enjoy your food. Typically heâs often left unsatisfied, his stomach growling with lingering hunger after his meals. But for some odd reason, every time heâs chowing down on your food, heâs satisfied. His stomach is silent but his chest is warm and fuzzy like dandelions. Are you sure you donât have any magic? Sebek decides to keep his curiosity to himself. Just like the rest of diasomnia, youâll find yourself faced with a box filled to the brim with food courtesy of the blushing, stuttering fae in front of you.
Extra <3
â Very rarely does Rollo find time to sit down and eat. Between his studies, his duties as student president and world domination (kidding), he is much too busy to have anything more than a piece of bread and glass of water. Youâll have to drag him to sit his ass down to eat and even then heâll be scolding you for messing up his schedule. But when the warm and homey scent of your food reaches his nose, his voice falls and mind clears. And all of a sudden, heâs very much aware of the ache in his bones, the growling of his stomach and the tight ringing of his head. Rollo listens to you tell him you made this just for him, heaviness hits his chest at the concern lacing your voice. Any other time heâd scoff and leave, but this is you. His friend. He doesnât hesitate. The moment your food touches his tongue heâs done for. Perhaps the hassle of life is worth it.
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst hcs#twst x reader#idia shroud x reader#idia x reader#ortho shroud#malleus x reader#malleus draconia x you#lilia vanrouge x reader#lilia x reader#silver x reader#sebek zigvolt x reader#sebek x reader#rollo x reader#rollo flamme x reader#mari writes
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Wildly Wealthy Koreans (5); inspired by Crazy Rich Asians
Pairing:Â Jungkook x (f.) Reader
Genre/Tags:Â photographer/ filmmaker! jungkook, rich girl/ fashion designer! reader, established relationship, angst, fluff, smut
Series summary:Â When you invite your boyfriend, Jungkook, to accompany you to your brother's wedding in your hometown, Daegu, heâs overjoyed, eager to meet your family and experience a side of your life youâve never shared with him. However, once he uncovers the truth about who you really are, heâs unable to grasp the full extent of your reality. The situation becomes even more complicated when a certain someone makes him feel profoundly unwelcome, leaving him to question not only your world, but also his place in it.
Disclaimer: This series is heavily inspired by the movie Crazy Rich Asians, with the storyline closely following the original film's plot. However, I wanted to reimagine it as a fanfiction, where Jungkook and OC take center stage as the main protagonists. While Iâve kept the core elements and themes from the movie, Iâve added my own touches here and there, such as altering certain character dynamics and incorporating a few original settings. Some scenes are directly inspired by the movie, and Iâve worked to recreate them in a way that it hopefully resonates with the fans of the movie. Hope you enjoy!!
Word Count: 8k+
Chapter Warnings: vandalization, wooyoung, your mom.
A/N: iâm so sorry for the super late update omg. since itâs the holiday season, my friends dragged me on an impromptu trip to the mountains, and I didnât have proper wifi for like three days, so I couldnât really proof read and post updates. anyways, i was thinking it might be a good idea to set fixed days of the week for updates, so I donât leave you all hanging for too long. how about we make it every tuesday for this one? and if Iâm feeling extra motivated, you might even get impromptu updates in between !! let me know what you think <3 also what do you guys think about this part? i really tried to mirror eleanor's character here hehehehe
part 5
Jungkook gulps, the uneasiness in his chest growing heavier with each passing second. His thoughts spiral... how could he not know something so significant about you? The weight of Wooyoungâs words lingers like a dark cloud, and Jungkook feels a pang of frustration at his own cluelessness.
Meanwhile, Wooyoung sits there, exuding smug satisfaction, his tone dripping with judgment and condescension. Before Jungkook can even think of a response, a familiar voice cuts through the tension.
"Hey, Jungkook! There you are. Iâve been looking for you everywhere."
Itâs Namjoon, one of your and Taehyungâs cousins. Jungkook immediately recognizes him from the tea ceremony and their brief interactions earlier on the cruise.
Without hesitation, Namjoon strides over, his easy grin never faltering as he helps Jungkook up from the bar, casually slinging an arm over his shoulder in a protective, almost brotherly gesture.
Jungkook blinks, startled but compliant, his gaze lingering on Wooyoung for a moment longer before he lets Namjoon steer him away.
As they weave through the pulsating crowd on the dance floor, Namjoon leans in slightly, his voice pitched low enough to be heard over the booming bass of the DJâs set. "Looks like you needed some saving." he murmurs, a soft knowing smile tugging at his lips.
Jungkook casts one last glance at the chaotic swirl of neon lights and bodies moving in sync with the music. The atmosphere feels oppressive, the conversation with Wooyoung still swirling in his head, but Namjoonâs steady presence offers a much-needed sense of calm.
"You okay?" Namjoon asks once theyâre out of earshot, his concern evident as he peers at Jungkook.
Jungkook exhales deeply, his hand running through his hair. "Who... was that?" he asks, his voice strained, laced with lingering frustration and confusion. Namjoon chuckles softly, his grip on Jungkookâs shoulder steady as they put more distance between themselves and the chaotic energy of the party.
"That?" he repeats, shaking his head slightly. "That was Wooyoung. A bit of a wildcard, but mostly harmless... as long as you donât let him get into your head."
Jungkook frowns, his mind still caught in the web of the earlier conversation. "He said some... things." he murmurs, his voice laced with tension. "About Y/n, about their past... and how her mom wanted them toâ" He stops abruptly, the words sticking in his throat, as if saying them aloud might solidify them into something undeniable.
Namjoon sighs, his expression softening as he glances at Jungkook. "Yeah, Wooyoung does have a knack for stirring the pot." he admits. "And... well, heâs not entirely wrong about some of it."
Jungkookâs head snaps towards Namjoon, his brows furrowed in confusion and frustration. "But youâve got to understand something, Jungkook." Namjoon begins, his tone measured.
"Y/nâs life before you? Itâs complicated. Her mom? Even more so. Sheâs... traditional. She wanted Y/n to settle down here, to live the life she envisioned for her. Going to New York? Pursuing fashion? That wasnât part of the plan. Her mom thought..." He trails off as they reach a quieter corner, settling near a small table where the thumping bass of the music fades to a faint hum.
"She thought Y/n would drift away... from her culture, her roots, everything she was raised with." Namjoon continues, his voice lower now. "So, she brought Wooyoung into the picture."
Jungkook leans forward slightly, absorbing every word, trying to piece together this part of your life he hadnât known.
"They didnât date." Namjoon clarifies quickly, sensing Jungkookâs unease. "Hell, Y/n couldnât even stand the guy. Heâs off-putting, doesnât know how to respect boundaries, and, honestly, just a jerk. I donât even know why Seokjin invited him tonight. Even Taehyung canât stand him." He pauses, shaking his head in exasperation before continuing.
"Anyway, Y/nâs mom had this whole idea that Wooyoung was the perfect match... stable, from a good family, all that nonsense. She thought marrying him would keep Y/n grounded, keep her here. But Y/n? She wasnât having any of it." he pauses, looking at Jungkook.
"She rebelled, stood her ground, and thank god for Taehyung and her dad. They backed her up, and eventually, her mom had no choice but to let her go and do what she wanted."
Namjoon leans back, his gaze steady as he studies Jungkook. "Look, Y/nâs family dynamic is... complex. But sheâs here now, and she chose her path. And she chose you." His words linger, grounding Jungkook in the present as the weight of the past begins to feel just a little less overwhelming.
Jungkook stays silent, sitting stiffly as the reality of everything sinks in. His hooded eyes stay fixed on the table, his mind churning with thoughts heâs struggling to process. Namjoon notices, his concern deepening at the tension in Jungkookâs shoulders and his distant expression.
"Hey..." Namjoon says gently a few second later, leaning forward. "Why donât we head back to your room? Iâll call a few friends, and we can just hang out, play some cards, or something chill." Heâs clearly trying to distract Jungkook, offering him an escape from the storm brewing inside.
Jungkook finally looks up, his lips curving into a tight, appreciative smile. The gesture speaks volumes, and Namjoon doesnât push further, understanding the gratitude in his silence. A distraction sounds good, better than sitting here, drowning in the spiral of his own thoughts.
"Yeah, sure." Jungkook agrees, his voice subdued. He rises from his seat, and Namjoon drapes a casual arm over his shoulders again as they make their way out.
"Youâre a good guy, you know that?" Namjoon says, his tone light but sincere. "Iâve heard so much about you from Y/n and Tae. Donât let stuff like this get to you. Itâs not worth it."
Jungkook nods, his expression unreadable. Heâs heard words like that more than once lately, but they leave him unsure... comforted, yes, but also questioning what kind of person he truly is. Still, he doesnât dwell on it, choosing instead to follow Namjoonâs lead.
As Namjoon pulls out his phone to text a few friends, Jungkook exhales slowly. The familiar comfort of his cabin feels like a welcome retreat. But the moment he unlocks the door and steps inside, the comfort vanishes.
"What the fuck?" Namjoon blurts out beside him, his voice sharp with shock. Jungkook freezes, his eyes widening as he takes in the chaos. His room is unrecognizable... furniture overturned, belongings scattered everywhere. But itâs the wall that grabs his attention, a chill running down his spine.
GO BACK TO NEW YORK, YOU BROKE MOTHERFUCKER.
The words are scrawled in bold red spray paint, glaringly hostile against the pale wall. Jungkookâs lips part in disbelief as he struggles to process what heâs seeing.
His gaze darts around the wreckage, landing on his camera lying on the floor. The sight makes his stomach drop... the lens is shattered, pieces of glass glinting in the light. His fists clench at his sides, and his jaw tightens as anger bubbles beneath the surface, threatening to spill over.
Namjoon steps forward cautiously, his brows furrowed as he surveys the destruction. "Who the hell would do this?" he mutters, his tone a mix of anger and disbelief.
Jungkook doesnât respond immediately, his chest heaving as he stares at the damage. Whoever did this wasnât just trying to vandalize... they were sending a message. A clear, personal message meant to hurt, to unsettle.
Namjoon places a firm hand on Jungkookâs shoulder. âJungkook...â he says, his tone steady but urgent. âWe need to report this. Now.â
Jungkook shakes his head, his jaw tightening. âNo, itâs okay.â he breathes out. âI donât want to make a scene.â He doesnât elaborate, but deep down, a suspicion simmers. He has a hunch whoâs behind this.
Namjoonâs lips press into a thin line, clearly unconvinced. His gaze flickers over Jungkookâs tense expression before he nods reluctantly. âAlright...â he concedes, though the hesitation in his voice is evident. âBut at least... letâs get someone to clean this up.â
As they step out of the cabin in search of help, Jungkookâs eyes catch a flicker of movement down the hallway. A group of men stand at the far end, partially hidden behind the corner of a wall. Theyâre watching him.
The moment Jungkookâs gaze locks on them, they smirk, their expressions dripping with smugness, almost as if theyâre proud of what theyâve done.
Jungkookâs stomach churns as the group casually turns and saunters away, their laughter echoing faintly. Itâs obvious... theyâre Wooyoungâs friends. The realization cements his earlier suspicion, and anger flares in his chest.
Childish. Immature. Petty. Thatâs all he can think. What kind of people stoop so low, targeting someone just because of who theyâre dating? He feels the bitterness rise in his throat but forces himself to swallow it. Dwelling on it would give them more power than they deserve.
Namjoon notices the shift in Jungkookâs demeanor and follows his line of sight. âThem?â he asks, his voice low. Jungkook exhales sharply through his nose and nods, though he says nothing.
Instead, he straightens his posture, his resolve hardening. âLetâs just focus on fixing this.â he says finally, his voice steady. Heâs unsettled, undeniably, but he refuses to let them win by giving the reaction they clearly want.
As the staff arrive to clean up the mess, Jungkook quietly requests Namjoon to let the incident go. âPlease... donât tell anyone about this.â he murmurs, his tone firm. âNot Taehyung... not Y/n. No one.â He says and Namjoon nods understandingly though he feels Wooyoung's actions need to be informed, especially to you.
The cruise crew, apologetic and accommodating, offers him a new cabin for the night while all the repairs are arranged. Jungkook accepts with a quiet nod, and Namjoon insists on helping him move his luggage.
Once everything is settled, Namjoon lingers at the doorway of the new cabin. His brows knit together in concern as he looks at Jungkook.
âYou sure youâll be okay, buddy?â he asks gently. Jungkook stands in the middle of the room, arms crossed tightly over his chest. He offers a tight-lipped smile, nodding. âYeah, donât worry about me.â he says, his voice quieter now.
Namjoon observes him for a beat longer, noticing the tension in his shoulders, the flicker of something unresolved in his eyes. âThanks for tonight, Namjoon.â Jungkook says after a moment, breaking the silence.
âNo need to thank me, man. Just... if you need anything, call me, okay?â Namjoonâs voice is soft but reassuring. He gives Jungkook a small, supportive smile before stepping out and closing the door behind him.
Now alone, Jungkook lets out a heavy sigh as he sinks onto the edge of the bed. The events of the night replay in his mind, but theyâre overshadowed by the larger storm brewing within him.
The spray-painted words and broken camera are bothersome, sure, but they pale in comparison to the weight of the new information heâs learned about you.
Why hadnât you told him?
The question gnaws at him. His thoughts spiral, each one sharper than the last. He wonders about the secrets you kept... your familyâs reality, their influence, their power, their reach. Part of him understands, he really does.
But another part wonders if you didnât trust him enough or if you were testing him somehow. The doubt curls in his chest, tightening with each passing second.
Before he can sink further into his thoughts, his phone buzzes. The screen lights up, and your name flashes on it. He stares at it for a moment, his thumb hovering over the answer button as he draws a calming breath. He doesnât want you to know what happened tonight. Not yet.
And even amidst the chaos, heâs missed you, and the thought of hearing your voice is a welcome relief. He finally picks up, holding the phone to his ear.
âHi, Kook!!â Your voice is bright and warm, cutting through his clouded thoughts. Despite himself, Jungkook smiles, the tension in his shoulders easing just a little. âHi, baby.â he murmurs softly, his voice carrying a warmth that matches yours. For a moment, everything else fades, and itâs just the two of you again.
âOh my god, I missed you so much.â you whine, your voice filled with a playful pout. Jungkook exhales a soft laugh, leaning back onto the mattress and clutching his phone tighter against his ear. A smile tugs at his lips, one he doesnât bother to suppress as he stares at the unfamiliar ceiling of his new cabin.
âWhy? Is Jeju that boring?â he teases, the humor in his voice masking the heaviness still lingering from earlier. âWithout you? Everythingâs boring.â you retort, the response so quick and earnest it pulls a chuckle from him. The sound carries a warmth that he didnât realize he desperately needed until now.
âHowâs the cruise going? Having fun?â you ask, your words bubbling with genuine curiosity. Jungkookâs eyes flit to the corner of the room, where his suitcase sits haphazardly unpacked.
Fun. The word feels almost foreign after the day heâs had. But for you, he keeps his voice steady.
âYeah, itâs been fun.â he lies smoothly, weaving the words together like armor. âOh my god, Iâm so glad to hear that!â Your excitement is so pure, so untainted, it makes him momentarily forget the day he's had. âI went to the Snoopy Garden today and it was so freaking adorable! Youâd love it. We have to come here together.â you beam.
He canât help but smile at your words. âThat sounds nice, baby.â he chuckles. âMake sure to send me pictures. I wanna see.â
âOf course! Iâll send them right after we hang up.â you promise, your enthusiasm so contagious that Jungkook feels the tightness in his chest ease ever so slightly.
As you continue to talk, filling him in on the small joys and whimsical adventures of your day at the island, he feels the tension seeping out of him.
Wooyoung, the spray-painted words, the shattered camera, the mocking laughter from the hallway, all of it fades into the periphery. Your voice, your laughter, the ease with which you share your world with him... it all anchors him in a way he canât quite explain.
A few minutes later, thereâs a sudden muffled noise on your end, and Jungkook recognizes the sounds of your friends calling you. He doesnât need to ask, he already knows whatâs coming.
âOkay, baby, I think I have to go.â you say reluctantly, your voice tinged with guilt. âMiyeon and the girls are dragging me to dinner.â
He hums softly, a small, understanding smile curving his lips. âOf course, baby. Go have fun. Call me when youâre back, okay?â Thereâs a pause before he adds, with a quiet sincerity. âI love you.â
âYes, I'll call you and I love you too.â you reply, your voice warm and unwavering. âBye!â
The line goes dead, and for a moment, Jungkook stays there, staring at the phone in his hand. The cabin is silent again, but it doesnât feel as suffocating as before. Youâve always had a way of making the world feel a little lighter, and tonight is no exception.
//
The next day flies by in a haze of chatter, laughter, and shared moments as Jungkook spends most of his time with Namjoon and Namjoon's friends.
Despite the tension simmering beneath the surface, he doesnât let Wooyoung or his friendsâ antics claw their way under his skin. Heâs determined not to give them the satisfaction of a reaction.
By the next afternoon, heâs in Taehyung's car along with your cousins, Namjoon and Seokjin, driving home back from the port. The ride is filled with easy conversation and the occasional bout of laughter, a welcome distraction from the remnants of unease still lingering in his mind.
âThanks for coming, Jungkook. Iâm sorry I couldnât spend much time with you.â Taehyung says, glancing over at Jungkook from the driver's seat, his expression apologetic. âYou know how it is... my friends were dragging me everywhere.â
âItâs all good, man.â Jungkook replies with a grin. âAnd I totally get it. It was your bachelor party, after all.â he adds. Taehyung laughs, the sound light and carefree. âStill, I wish I could've spent more time with my sister's boyfriend.â
The familiar sight of your house comes into view not long after as Taehyung zooms past the long driveway, and Jungkook feels a wave of relief wash over him. Exhaustion tugs at his limbs, but more than anything, a quiet longing stirs in his chest. All he wants right now is to see you.
After bidding the others goodbye and hauling his luggage inside, he heads straight to your room. Your flight should be landing any time now. He checks his phone absentmindedly, hoping for a message or a call to signal your return and for now, all he can do is wait.
//
Miyeon giggles as she stretches her arms, stepping out of the car. âMost healing bachelorette party ever.â she declares, a dreamy expression on her face.
âI can still feel my masseuseâs hands on me. I donât know what magic she used, but it feels like my back and shoulders have been reborn.â she exhales. You laugh as the guards step forward to collect your luggage. âHonestly, same. I want to go back just to get that massage again.â
As the guards carry your bags towards the house, you follow Miyeon inside, the faint chatter of voices growing louder the deeper you go. Your heels click softly against the marble floor as you both approach the lounge, as familiar voices draw your attention.
You peek inside and instantly smile. Seokjin is hunched over the billiards table, holding his cue stick with a dramatic level of precision. Namjoon stands to the side, visibly exasperated, one hand holding his cue stick against the floor while his other hand rests on his hip as he watches Seokjin line up a shot.
âLook Namjoon...â Seokjin drawls, his tone a mix of amusement and condescension. âYou're supposed to stand like this. Your posture is a disgrace to billiards.â
Namjoon groans, running a hand through his hair. âHyung, my posture isnât the problem. The problem is youâre cheating.â
âCheating?!â Seokjin straightens, feigning deep offense. âExcuse me, I play with honor and integrity. You, on the other hand, couldnât aim if your life depended on it.â he shrugs.
âYouâre just salty because your aimâs been off the entire game." Namjoon fires back. âWatch. Iâm about to sink three balls in one shot.â
âSure.â Taehyung interjects from his spot by the bar, swirling a glass of whiskey casually. âAnd when you miss, Jin hyung will find a way to roast you for the next hour.â
You and Miyeon exchange amused glances, both of you shaking your heads as the banter continues. Namjoon leans over the table dramatically, his cue stick angled as though heâs about to make the shot of the century.
Seokjin watches him like a hawk, ready to pounce on any mistake. Taehyung simply sips his drink, muttering something under his breath about âhopeless competitors.â
As you approach them, your thoughts wander. Despite the comfort of home and the familiarity of these voices, a part of you feels incomplete. Your eyes sweep the room once more, subtly searching for your boyfriend.
Youâre desperate to see him, to feel his arms around you, to close the unbearable distance thatâs stretched between you these past two days.
Somehow, two days have felt like an eternity. Youâve replayed every text and call in your mind, but nothing compares to having him here, tangible, in front of you.
âOh my god, baby...â Taehyung is the first to notice the two of you approaching. Without missing a beat, he sets his glass of whiskey down on the bar and strides forward, pulling Miyeon into a warm hug. âYou guys are back!â he exclaims, his smile wide and genuine as he steps back to take a good look at both of you.
You canât help but grin at him, waving at Namjoon and Seokjin, who have momentarily paused their game of billiards to acknowledge your arrival.
After a few exchanges of pleasantries and brief chatter about the island trip, you finally ask the question thatâs been burning on your mind. âWhereâs Jungkook?â
âOh, heâs up in your room. He seemed a bit tired.â Namjoon answers. Your lips part slightly as you nod. âOkay then. Iâll go to him. You guys enjoy yourselves.â you say, offering a warm smile before hugging everyone. Turning on your heels, you exit the lounge and begin making your way towards the staircase.
Just when you're in the middle of ascending the stairs, a voice interrupts you. âY/N!â
You glance over your shoulder at the sound of your name, only to see Namjoon trailing behind you, his steps hesitant. His expression holds something you canât quite decipher, like heâs battling with his own thoughts.
âJoonie?â you say, your voice laced with curiosity and just a hint of concern as you watch him climb the stairs to meet you.
âHey...â he breathes out, stopping a step below yours, his gaze briefly dropping to the floor before he looks at you. His hesitation sends a ripple of unease through you.
âWhatâs up, Joonie??â you ask gently, studying his face for clues. The slight tension in his shoulders, the way he exhales like heâs carrying a weight heâs unsure he should share, it all sets your nerves alight.
âY/NâŠâ he begins, pausing as if choosing his next words carefully. âIâve been debating whether to tell you this, butâŠâ He trails off, his hand raking through his hair in frustration. You take a step closer, your heart beginning to pound. âJoonie?? Is everything okay??"
He sighs deeply, the sound heavy and conflicted. âWell.. Itâs about Jungkook...â
The mention of your boyfriend immediately tightens something in your chest. âWhat happened to Jungkook?â you ask quickly, your voice rising with worry.
Namjoon hesitates, his gaze searching yours. âHe didnât want me to tell you this... butâŠâ He exhales sharply, shaking his head. âIt doesnât feel right to keep this from you. You should know.â
Your stomach churns, dread blooming in your chest. âKnow what? What happened?â you ask again.
Namjoon looks away for a moment, as though gathering the courage to speak, before his eyes meet yours again. âIt started at the bar⊠Wooyoung approached him. He said some things... about your past... about how your mom wanted... you and Wooyoung to get married.â
The words hit you like a punch to the gut, and for a moment, you canât breathe.
Namjoon presses on, his voice tinged with anger. âBut it didnât stop there. Wooyoungâs friends... well.. they went after Jungkook. They trashed his cabin... broke his camera... spray-painted some cruel things on the wall.â He pauses, his jaw tightening.
âThey did what?â you ask, disbelief dripping from your voice. This was the last thing you ever expected to hear. Your chest tightens painfully as the weight of Namjoonâs words settles in. Jungkook had endured all of this alone and you hadnât had the slightest clue.
And of course, knowing him you understand why he didn't want this to reach you. And somehow that breaks your heart and fills you with guilt, especially because he found out about something youâd been carefully waiting for the right moment to tell him. The layers of emotions overwhelm you, each more suffocating than the last.
âWhy... why was Wooyoung even on that cruise?â you ask, your voice rising with frustration now, the disbelief giving way to simmering anger. Namjoon raises his hands quickly in defense. âHey, That's on Jin Hyung.â he says.
"But anyways, I really thought you should know this." His voice softens as he continues. âJungkook seemed pretty shaken up by it, even though he tried not to show it. So⊠please, just take care of him.â
You nod, swallowing the lump in your throat. The gratitude you feel for Namjoon is momentary, overshadowed by the urgency now coursing through your veins. Without wasting another second, you turn on your heel and dash up the stairs, heading towards your room.
//
Jungkook smiles to himself as he rests on the pillow, scrolling through the videos you'd sent him over the past two days. His chest warms as he watches a clip of you playing with two cats on the island, your laughter echoing softly through the speaker.
The way your nose scrunches in delight makes his heart flutter, and he giggles quietly, his thumb hovering over the replay button. "Where are you?" he mutters under his breath with a wistful sigh, the corners of his lips still tugged into a smile.
And just like magic, the door to your room suddenly bursts open with a loud bang. He jumps slightly, his phone nearly slipping from his hand. Before he can even process your sudden arrival, youâre bolting towards him.
Jungkook barely has time to sit up straight before you fling yourself onto him, wrapping your arms around him with a ferocity that nearly knocks the breath out of his lungs.
âBabyââ he starts, his voice laced with confusion and concern, but you cut him off before he can finish. âIâm sorry.â The words tumble out of your mouth in a shaky breath, muffled as you bury your face into the crook of his neck.
Your hold on him tightens. âIâm sorry. Namjoon told me everything. Iâm sorry about Wooyoung, Iâm sorry about his friends, Iâm sorry about your cabin, Iâm sorry about your cameraâŠâ Your voice breaks slightly as you ramble, the guilt pouring out of you in waves.
Jungkook exhales deeply, and you feel the tension in his body ease as his arms come around you, his hands resting gently on your back. He holds you close, rubbing soothing circles against your spine.
âIs this how youâre going to greet me after spending two whole days in Jeju?â he teases, his voice light with humor, though you can hear the warmth beneath it. âWhat happened to âhi, hello, I missed you?ââ
Despite the joking tone, the tender way Jungkook rubs your back anchors you. You pull back slightly, just enough to meet his gaze. Thereâs a softness in his eyes, a quiet warmth that seems to steady your unraveling thoughts.
âIâm really sorry, Kook.â you repeat, your voice trembling as you try to convey the depth of your regret.
He shakes his head gently, his hand leaving your back to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear. âBaby, why are you apologizing for something you had no control over?â he asks, his tone light but earnest. âYouâre not responsible for what Wooyoung or his friends did.â
âI shouldâve told you about him...â you admit, your voice low, almost wavering. âAbout us, our past⊠everything. I should've been honest.â
Jungkook doesnât answer right away. Instead, he leans forward, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to your forehead. The simple gesture makes your chest tighten with emotion, grounding you in a way that words canât.
When he pulls back, his gaze is steady but contemplative. âBaby...â he starts carefully, his voice softer now. âCan I ask you something?â
You nod instantly, your heart thudding. âOf course. Anything.â you say. He hesitates, the flicker of uncertainty in his eyes making your stomach churn. âWhy didnât you... why didn't ever you tell me about your family?â he asks at last, the question laced with a vulnerability that makes your chest ache.
Your breath hitches at the question, and for a moment, you feel exposed. But a part of you knew this was coming. You knew that hiding your life from Jungkook and then unveiling it all on a random Thursday would inevitably lead to this moment.
âIt's justâŠâ You pause, your voice wavering as you try to find the right words, your eyes searching his face for reassurance. âKook, when we first met... you had no idea who I was or who my family was and... you were just so... so different from all the men I grew up with.â
Jungkook doesnât say anything, his gaze steady, waiting for you to continue. Instead, you feel his grip tighten ever so slightly, his silent way of encouraging you to speak your truth.
âYou were this bright, passionate man with these beautiful, expressive eyes and that gorgeous, dreamy smile...â you begin, your voice trembling as a fond smile tugs at your lips.
âAnd for the first time in forever, I felt like I could just⊠breathe around someone. With you, I didnât have to be this polished or poised woman who had to fit into some high-class society mold. I didnât have to pretend to be someone else... because being myself around you... was just... so easy, without having to worry about where I came from and who my family was.â
Your thumb gently traces over the faint scar on his cheek, a gesture so intimate it makes his heart jump. His gaze softens, melting into yours as if you're the only person in the world. âYou just... liked me for me. Not because of my family, my connections, or my status, but because of who I was with you. You saw me... the real me... when I didnât even know how to see myself.â
Your voice falters slightly, but you donât look away, letting him see the emotion in your eyes. âI know it was selfish of me... but I... so badly wanted to hold on to that feeling... the feeling of being loved in a way that felt so⊠pure." you pause, a shallow breath escaping your lips.
" I just⊠I just I didnât know how to tell you about that part of me...â
Jungkook listens intently, his expression softening even more as your words sink in. Slowly, he tugs you closer, pulling you into his warm embrace. You feel his heartbeat steady against your own, his presence grounding you in a way only he can.
âBaby...â he whispers, his voice low as his fingertips trail soothing patterns along your back. âFor me, itâs always been you. It always will be you. None of that other stuff matters... your family, your status, your class... theyâre just parts of you that Iâll embrace because they make up the woman I love. But beyond all that, I love you for you.â
His voice dips into something deeper, more vulnerable. âAnd Iâm glad I could bring out the real you. Itâs everything Iâve ever wanted, and itâs an honor to be able to experience that side of you." he hugs you tighter, before continuing.
"You have no idea how my world has changed ever since you entered it. You make everything... brighter and just... more bearable. You make it all make sense. So thank you for coming into my life. Thank you for trusting me with your heart.â
Your eyes well up as you close them, leaning into his embrace. The warmth of his words, paired with the steady rhythm of his heartbeat, feels like the safest place youâve ever known. âThank you for coming into my life too.â you breathe out, voice thick with emotion.
After a beat of silence, you pull back slightly. âBut Iâm still sorry about Wooyoung. I'm going to give him a piece of my mind, I swearââ
âHey.â He cuts you off, a small chuckle escaping his lips as he shakes his head. âThereâs no need for that. Letâs just forget it happened, okay?â
You pout, reluctant to let it go, but his soft, reassuring expression makes you falter. âFine...â you huff, a sigh escaping your lips. âStill...â you murmur, your fingers absentmindedly playing with the hem of his collar. âIâm sorry, Kook. Thank you... for always being so understanding. I truly donât deserve you.â
He shakes his head, the faintest hint of exasperation softened by the smile tugging at his lips. "You deserve the world, baby. And Iâll spend the rest of my life proving it to you.â
A soft giggle escapes you, the light in his eyes mirrored by the smile that refuses to leave your lips. âI love you.â you whisper, the words filled with every ounce of emotion youâve been holding in.
His toothy smile, the one that always makes your heart flutter, breaks across his face. âI love you too.â he replies.
And just like that, as if drawn by an unspoken force, he leans in, capturing your lips with his. The warmth of his kiss washes over you, soothing every ache, every worry, and filling you with a certainty that everything is exactly as itâs meant to be.
//
"Do we get to eat them ??" Jungkook asks, leaning against the doorframe, his eyes following your reflection in the mirror as you brush your hair. A giggle escapes your lips at his eager tone. âOf course, baby. You can eat all of them if you want to.â you reply, shooting him a playful grin.
With the wedding just around the corner, the house is bustling with preparations, but today feels different. Your grandma insisted on gathering everyone to make dumplings for the rehearsal dinner that's coming up.
You and Jungkook make your way to the dining room, the air filled with the warm aroma of freshly prepared ingredients. The large table is the centerpiece of the room, and as soon as you step inside, the sight of your family fills you with comfort and joy.
Taehyung and Seokjin are already deep in their dumpling-making attempts, though it's clear theyâve caused more chaos than progress.
Both of them have flour smeared across their faces like war paint, a result of what mustâve been an enthusiastic but poorly thought-out experiment.
âHyung, that dumpling looks like a deflated balloon.â Taehyung teases Seokjin, holding up his creation for comparison. Seokjin huffs, rolling his eyes. âAt least mine isnât oozing out stuffing like yours, Tae. What are you making? A dumpling that's throwing up?â
âCall it modern art, Hyung.â Taehyung retorts, grinning mischievously as he tosses a bit of flour at Seokjin, who gasps dramatically. âYah! Taehyung, do you want me to dump this entire bowl of stuffing on your head?â Seokjin warns, clearly frustrated.
Across the table, Namjoon and Miyeon work with quiet precision, their movements synchronized like a well-rehearsed dance. Namjoon occasionally sneaks a glance at the chaos brewing between Taehyung and Seokjin, shaking his head with a fond smile.
âYou two are worse than toddlers.â he quips, not looking up from his perfectly shaped dumpling. âAt this rate, we're all gonna finish a hundred dumplings before you guys finish ten.â
Miyeon chuckles, her hands deftly sealing another dumpling. âJoon's right. How are you both so bad at this? Itâs not rocket science.â
Taehyung gasps in mock offense. âExcuse me, babe, I don't know if you've noticed but Jin hyung is literally sabotaging me!â he exclaims. âIâm the one sabotaging you?â Seokjin laughs incredulously. âLook at my face, Tae. I look like a ghost, thanks to you!â
Namjoonâs mom, your favorite aunt, sits at the far end of the table as she rolls the dough into perfect circles, her laughter ringing like a bell.
âBoys, boys...â she interjects, her voice gentle but firm. âStop fighting and focus on your dumplings. Otherwise, your future kids will hear stories about how their dads couldnât make dumplings to save their lives.â
Everyone bursts out laughing at her comment, even Taehyung and Seokjin, who share a sheepish grin before returning to their task.
As you and Jungkook approach the group, everyone greets the two of you with warm smiles. Jungkook pulls out a chair for you to sit, earning a scrunch of your nose in fondness at the sweet gesture. After youâre settled, he takes the seat beside you, his hand instinctively finding yours under the table.
"So, I see Tae and Jin are already setting records... for failure...â you quip, your eyes gleaming with mischief as you glance at the disfigured dumplings piled in front of them. âHey, those are Taeâs!â Seokjin protests, pushing forward another plate of equally disastrous dumplings. âMine look way better, see?â
âAh, yes.â you reply with mock solemnity, inspecting the plate. âSuch fine craftsmanship. Truly an expert.â you giggle.
Everyone bursts into laughter and so does Jungkook, his eyes crinkling as he takes in the scene. He looks around, marveling at the tender warmth that surrounds your family.
âOkay, watch closely everyone...â you suddenly announce, picking up a perfect circle of dough. âThe secret to making a good dumpling is love. And also, not being like Taehyung.â you grin.
âHey!â Taehyung protests, earning another round of laughter. You press on, your tone turning exaggeratedly instructive.
âFirst, you scoop just the right amount of stuffing... not too much, or itâll explode like Taeâs modern art pieces.â You hold up a small spoonful of filling, placing it precisely in the center of the dough. Jungkook observes your actions, a fond smile tugging at his lips.
âNext, you fold it in half, like youâre tucking it in for a nap. Be gentle, itâs delicate.â
Jungkook leans in closer, watching intently as your fingers press the edges together. âThen, you join the edges, like this... pinch... pinch... pinch.â you continue, your fingers deftly creating a neat, ruffled pattern. âThink of it as accessorizing your dumpling... it needs to be cute, you know?â
âWow...â Jungkook murmurs, his voice full of awe. âYouâre like the Michelangelo of dumplings.â he giggles. âPlease.â you reply with a dramatic shrug. âIâm just a humble dumpling artist.â
Emboldened, Jungkook picks up his own piece of dough, determination written all over his face. âAlright, let me try. Scoop... fold.... pinch, pinch, pinch⊠done!â He holds up his quick creation triumphantly. You glance at it and press your lips together to stifle a laugh.
âHmm....â you say, tilting your head. âLooks like your dumpling had a very long night.â you tease as the rest of the table laughs. âItâs rustic.â Jungkook counters, grinning despite himself. âRustic indeed.â you tease, your laugh mingling with his.
As Jungkook continues fumbling with the dough, his brow furrowed in concentration, he glances around the lively table and decides to engage. âSo, did you guys do this even as kids?â he asks, his voice light and curious as eyes dart between you, Taehyung and your cousins.
Before anyone can respond, the mood shifts. Your mother strides into the room, carrying a fresh tray of stuffing. Jungkookâs posture stiffens instinctively as her gaze briefly locks with his.
Her expression is impassive... polite on the surface but brimming with subtle tension. She sets the tray down and takes a seat directly across from the two of you, her movements precise and deliberate.
âHi, Mama.â you greet warmly, your voice bright as you flash her a quick smile. She returns it with practiced ease but doesnât linger, her attention quickly shifting to the task at hand. Her eyes flick to Jungkook, assessing him with a glance thatâs colder than heâd prefer. He swallows hard, the discomfort settling in his chest like a heavy stone.
âIt was more like we didnât have a choice.â Namjoon pipes up, steering the conversation back to Jungkookâs question. His teasing tone earns chuckles from Seokjin and Taehyung, who nod in agreement.
âExactly.â your aunt chimes in, shooting Namjoon an exaggerated glare. "We taught you, so you'd know the blood, sweat and tears it took to raise and feed you monkeys." she says as everyone laughs. Jungkook smiles faintly, grateful for the distraction, though the unease lingers.
The past few days at your familyâs home had been a mix of warmth and tension for him. While the rest of your family had embraced him easily, your motherâs guarded demeanor made him feel like he was walking on eggshells. Heâs done his best to stay out of her way, but now, sitting face-to-face, her disapproval is palpable.
âIf we donât pass down traditions like this, theyâll disappear.â your mother says suddenly, her voice cutting through the chatter. She folds the dough around a perfect mound of stuffing, her movements sharp and efficient. Without lifting her eyes from her work, she continues. âIâm sure you find all of this unusual.â
Her words hang heavy in the air, and Jungkook feels the weight of her unspoken judgment. âThey donât teach things like this in the West, do they?â she continues, finally meeting his gaze. Her eyes are cool, her tone sharp enough to draw blood.
The room falls silent, the cheerful chatter replaced by thick tension. Jungkook swallows, unsure how to respond while you shift in your seat, your breath hitching at the unwanted confrontation. Before you can step in, Seokjin's voice breaks the silence.
âGrandma!â he exclaims, leaping to his feet as your grandmother enters the room. He strides towards her with exaggerated enthusiasm, offering his arm. âYouâre finally here!â
Grateful for the distraction, everyone rises to greet her respectfully. Her presence is like a balm, soothing the roomâs strained energy. She smiles warmly, her eyes crinkling at the corners as she takes in the bustling scene.
âY/N-ah...â she says, her gaze landing on you before shifting to Jungkook. âYou brought Jungkook too.â Her smile widens as she inches closer to him, her hand lifting to cup his cheek gently. âHello, sweetheart.â she says, her voice warm and affectionate.
Jungkook bows slightly, his lips curving into a polite smile. âHello, Grandma.â he replies softly, the tension in his chest easing under her kind gaze.
As everyone settles back into their seats, your grandmother sits at the head of the table, near your mother, her sharp eyes scanning the dumplings in front of her. âDid you make those?â she asks lightly, a playful smile tugging at her lips.
Your mother forces out a stiff smile. âYes, Ma.â she replies. âHmm.â your grandmother hums thoughtfully, inspecting the dumplings more closely. âIt seems youâve lost your touch.â she adds.
Jungkook notices the way your motherâs jaw tightens, her forced smile barely hiding the undercurrent of irritation. âIâll do better.â she replies, her voice taut, the words clipped as if forcing themselves out.
Itâs a subtle moment, so fleeting it slips past everyone else in the room, including you. But Jungkook catches it. The way her fingers pause ever so slightly over the dumpling sheâs shaping, the sharp edge in her tone... it all lingers in the air, faint yet telling.
Just as he processes what heâs seen, your motherâs gaze suddenly snaps up, meeting his. Jungkookâs eyes widen instinctively, caught off guard by her piercing stare. Her expression shifts in an instant, the forced warmth melting away to reveal a sour look that seems to pin him in place.
In that split second, Jungkook realizes... she knows he saw it.
Not wanting to overstep or make things worse he quickly averts his eyes, pretending to focus on the dumpling in his hands. He swallows hard, willing himself to appear unaffected, as though he hadnât just witnessed the moment.
But the unease remains. He can feel her gaze lingering on him for a second longer before she looks away, her mask of politeness slipping back into place.
Jungkook exhales softly, his shoulders tight as he resumes his task. He glances at you, wondering if youâve noticed anything, but youâre too engrossed in folding the dumplings to sense the silent exchange.
Still, the weight of your mother's reaction stays with him. For the first time, he wonders if your motherâs reservations arenât just about him but about something deeper, something unresolved within her.
//
As Jungkook steps out of the dining room, the faint smell of flour and spices still clinging to his hands, he glances around, searching for the washroom. Despite having spent days at your house, he still finds the maze-like layout disorienting. The grand size of the place only adds to his sense of displacement.
He sighs in mild frustration, realizing heâs turned down the wrong hallway yet again. Just as heâs about to retrace his steps, he notices someone approaching from the other end. His stomach sinks slightly as he recognizes your mother.
She seems preoccupied as she carefully dusts her dress. Jungkook freezes instinctively, his smile faltering as she nears. Though he musters up a polite smile when she looks up, she doesnât return it.
As the silence stretches and her gaze lingers on him, Jungkook decides to break the tension. âIâmâŠâ he begins, clearing his throat nervously. âIâm a little lost.â he admits with an awkward laugh, gesturing vaguely towards the hallway behind him.
Your mother stops a few feet away, her arms crossed loosely. Her expression is unreadable, though Jungkook can feel the weight of her scrutiny. âThis house can be... confusing.â she replies, her tone neutral but edged with something unspoken.
Jungkook nods quickly, eager to agree. âYeah, definitely. I thought I had it figured out, but I keep ending up in the wrong place.â He chuckles softly, rubbing the back of his neck.
She studies him for a moment longer before sighing quietly. âThe washroom is down that way.â she curtly says, pointing towards the opposite hall.
âOh, okay. Thank you.â Jungkook says, his tone earnest. He hesitates for a moment, feeling the urge to say something more... something to break the wall between them. âAlso... I⊠I just really wanted to thank you..." he starts and your mother's brows furrow, trying to understand where this is coming from.
Jungkook notices her confusion and decides to press on, his voice tentative yet earnest. âFor, um⊠for letting me stay here. I know it canât be easy, having someone new around. But I just⊠I really appreciate it.â he says, his words measured yet sincere.
She studies him for a moment, her gaze unreadable. Then, a faint, almost imperceptible smile curls one corner of her lips. âIt isnât easy.â she admits, her tone steady, though thereâs an edge to it that makes him slightly uneasy.
âBut, surprisinglyâŠâ she begins, stepping a little closer, her expression unreadable. âI see myself in you.â she says. Jungkook blinks, unsure how to respond. He waits, the weight of her words hanging in the air like a storm cloud.
âY/Nâs grandmother...â she continues, her voice calm. âShe was never accepting of me. When Y/Nâs father told her he wanted to marry me⊠well, letâs just say it was far from a warm approval.â
Her gaze locks onto Jungkookâs, her eyes sharp and unwavering. âI wasnât her first choice. And, honestly...â she chuckles dryly, though the sound lacks humor. âI wasnât her second either.â
Jungkookâs expression softens as understanding starts to dawn, the earlier interaction between her and your grandmother now making more sense. âGosh⊠Iâm so sorry. I had no idea.â he says quickly, his voice laced with genuine remorse.
She acknowledges his apology with a small smile, though her gaze remains cold, unyielding. âI didnât come from the right family, didnât have the right connections. To her, I wasnât an adequate match for her son.â she explains.
âBut⊠she eventually came around, right?â Jungkook asks cautiously, his tone tinged with hope. She exhales, the sound heavy with years of pent-up emotion.
âIt took many years.â she admits, nodding faintly. âShe had her reasons... valid ones, even. But I worked hard, sacrificed more than I ever thought I could. Eventually, she saw how much traditions and family mattered to me, and maybe that earned her respect. But...â she pauses, her faint smile turning somber. âThere were many days when I wondered if Iâd ever truly measure up.â
Jungkook listens intently, his chest tightening with a newfound appreciation for the struggles your mother seemed to have endured.
âAnd having lived through all of that...â she begins again, her voice lower now, each word carrying weight. âI know one thing for certain...â
She takes another step closer, her presence suddenly oppressive. Her smile twists into something darker, a faint smirk with a sharp edge that sends a shiver down Jungkookâs spine.
âYou will never be enough.â
<- part 4
series masterlist
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#jungkook fic#jungkook#jungkook fanfic#jungkook x reader#jungkook fluff#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jeon jungkook#bts#bts jungkook#bts fic#enemies to lovers#jungkook fanfiction#crazy rich asians
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Beneath The Surface - 1
Pairing: Trafalgar Law x fem!reader
Summary: When memories, buried deep within your sea of emotions, resurface, youâre left to question what lies beneath the surface. Did he truly mean to leave you behind, or was there something more to his silence than you ever understood?
Word Count: 1.2K
Warnings: angst, swearing, mentions of death, OP spoilers
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So I havenât properly proofread this chapterâŠbeen a bit sick this past week, but I was determined to post this part today. Itâs not terrible though đ€âŠI think.
You had locked yourself up in your room, claiming to be unwell. The truth was simpler: your mind had been consumed by memories you thought you had buried. Memories of him. The boy who once soothed your pain had become the man responsible for it.
He left me behind.
That thought replayed in your head, each repetition sinking deeper into your chest. Just the image of his face brought a sickening churn of emotions â hurt, betrayal, anger, and a flicker of something you refused to name.
The soft knock on your door is what finally drew your attention away from your thoughts. On the other side of the door stood Viola, a small but gentle smile on her face when she found you sprawled on your bed.
âI heard you were feeling sick, everything okay?â she asked, as she made her way further into your bedroom.
âYeah, nothing a good dayâs rest wonât cure,â you responded, and her lips immediately contorted into a frown.
âThen youâre not going to be too happy about this.â Her voice softened, tinged with regret. âDoflamingo needs you.â
You sighed, pushing yourself up into a sitting position. Of course he needs me. You didnât know why you ever thought youâd be able to get a day to yourself, it had rarely occurred before.
âOf course he does,â you muttered under your breath, setting aside the book you had been pretending to read.
Viola gave you a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry. If it were up to me, I'd let you rest."
You forced a smile, appreciating her kindness. "It's okay. Thanks, Viola."
She nodded, giving your shoulder a reassuring squeeze before leaving the room. Taking a deep breath, you steeled yourself for whatever Doflamingo had in store.
The walk to his room felt long and unpleasant as always. The entire palace always made you uncomfortable, its grandeur a stark contrast to the simpler, slightly happier times of your childhood. It was also a reminder of the life you once lived along side your parents, and without him to console you over those memories, it only brought more pain.
But it hadnât always been like this. You remember when you first moved in, though a palace, it had a comforting and almost cozy feel to it. However, Doflamingo had made drastic changes, his reason being that the Donquixote family should live in a place that befitted them.
You had tried to get him to let you live outside the palace, the discomfort it brought had been too much at first. But Doflamingo insisted that the entire Donquixote family stay within the palace walls. And thatâs why you had tried to make your own room as comfortable as possible. However, that had done little to help. With how often Doflamingo made you run around doing errands for him, or insisted that he watch over you, there was barely any time to relax.
As you gave a soft knock against the heavy wooden doors, to let Doflamingo know you had arrived, you pushed it open to find him standing by the window, his back turned to you as you entered.
âYou summoned me, Doffy?" you called out, as you slowly made your way towards him, the atmosphere of the room always making you feel uneasy. It was as if the room itself embodied his very being - intimidating and frightening.
He turned on hearing your voice, a smile plastered on his face. "Ah, my little Rose there you are. Feeling better, I hope?"
You nodded, knowing the question was nothing more than a pleasantry. "What do you need?"
His smile widened, and an eerie chill ran down your spine. "I have a special task for you. I need you to retrieve someone for me."
You frowned, confused by his unforeseen happiness. You had heard there was an incident at Punk Hazard, and although you didnât know the details, you knew Doflamingo had been beyond enraged. It was another reason why you had chosen to stay in your room, to avoid his temper. So, his uncharacteristic cheerfulness almost baffled you.
âWho?â you questioned, although you had an inkling of who it might be.
âCaesar,â he said simply, his tone light but his eyes watching your reaction closely. âIâm sure youâve heard, thereâs been some...issues. I want you to bring him back from Greenbit."
A wave of confusion hit you once again. âWhy me?â
It wasnât like him to send you on retrieval missions. While you had been privy to fights and conflicts, you had never been a fan of them, and Doflamingo knew this. It was why you mainly ran around doing tasks within the palace. He had called it âprotection,â but you had always suspected he thought you too soft-hearted for the darker work.
It had happened before, when you were younger and out on a mission. He had nearly lost you then, and he wouldnât have it happen again.
âIâve decided you need to be involved in these matters as well. You canât be the only one who doesnât get involved, itâs not fair to you. â A cold knot of dread formed in your stomach when you saw Doflamingo's eyes glint dangerously. You had thought that you would be able to stay away from such tasks given your temperament, but that had clearly changed.
âBut why now?â you asked, and you could feel your heart rate pick up when Doflamingo gave you an almost sinister smile.
âWeâre short on people. The pirates who attacked Punk Hazard killed Monet, so we need as much backup as we can get. Plus, the others think you need to start doing your bit,â he said, almost nonchalantly, as if the death of one of his comrades didnât bother him at all. But you brushed it off, subconsciously convincing yourself it was his way of dealing with grief. âAnd I think this would be the perfect opportunity to test you Rosie.â
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the task ahead. You had always known that the latest additions to the Donquixote family, all but Viola, did not like the almost favouritism that Doflamingo showed - always tasking you with the simpler jobs. This was your chance to prove your worth, and finally get them off your case. Besides, what harm would come from a simple retrieval mission?
"Alright, Doffy. Iâll bring Caesar back."
He smiled, a satisfied gleam in his eyes, almost akin to a predator satisfied with its prey. "Good. And remember, I expect nothing less than success."
As you stepped out into the hall, your resolve wavered slightly, the enormity of the task ahead settling in.
So caught up in your thoughts, you didnât notice that someone had walked by you into the room. The shutting of the door is what finally drew you out of your thoughts and you briefly glanced back, the voices within the room, a stark reminder of the life you had chosen.
You shook off the unease and focused on the task at hand. Whatever doubts you had, you pushed them aside. There was no room for weakness. You had a mission to complete, and you would do it with all the strength you could muster. For the town you now called home and the people you called family.
As you walked away, the voices in the room grew distant, and you missed out on listening in on a conversation that would have likely saved you from your impending misfortune.
âDoffy why are you sending her to retrieve Caesar?â
Despite his recent misfortune, another sinister smile spread across Doflamingoâs face. âItâs about time I test her abilities. And who better than Law to be the test subject?â
âââââ
Part 1 done! I feel like I may have included some unnecessary bits here and there, but oh well. I hope you liked it. Let me know if you would like to be added to the taglist.
taglist: @riftmage27
#law x reader#trafalgar law x reader#one piece x reader#law x you#trafalgar law fanfiction#law x y/n#law fanfic#trafalgar law x y/n
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This is probably one of the first PJO fics I ever wrote- I started this back in May when think I was still reading Mark of Athena, before I even shipped Valgrace. Not sure why I didnât post this back then but I will now.
â â â â â â â â â
Leo wasnât sure how many hours heâd spent in the engine room. The rhythmic thumps of the machinery and thick, hot air seemed to lull him into a trance. He remembered stories Percy had told him about a place called the Lotus Casino, where time slipped away and you never wanted to leave. Leo felt like that whenever he was working on something. Nothing else existed beyond this room.
Banging on the door snapped Leo out of his daze.
âLeo?â A muffled voice called.
The door opened, and Leo was hit with a rush of cold air. Frank came in, a nervous expression on his face. He was holding a plate with a cheese sandwich and some crisps on it, his hand still on the doorknob. His face was knotted with concern, and his brow was sweating. Not many people went into the engine room- Leo didnât mind the heat, but it made his friends uncomfortable.
âUmm⊠you werenât at dinner,â Frank said, nervously.
Leo cursed in Spanish and rubbed his forehead, âMustâve lost track of time. Sorry.â
âNo, itâs okay,â Frank said, quickly, âItâs just no-oneâs seen you all day. We were getting kinda worried. I, um⊠I brought you some food and your ADHD medication from your nightstand. I didnât know if youâd taken them yet today.â
âThanks,â Leo took the bottle of meds and the water, genuinely touched. He popped a pill and chugged the water. Immediately, he felt better. He hadnât realised how thirsty he was.
âSorry,â Leo repeated, wiping his mouth with his sleeve, âItâs just the engine needs work, thereâs an issue with the primary coupling- nevermind. It doesnât matter.â
Frank put the plate of food down on the floor next to him and sat down.
âShow me. Maybe I can help?â
Leo smiled, and then began pointing at various bits of machinery, explaining as best he could how all of it worked. Frank nodded and listened.
âThe problem is with the pistons at the back,â Leo explained, âItâs hard to reach, so itâs tedious work.â
âMaybe I could turn into something small and take a closer look?â Frank offered.
They worked on the machine for the next half an hour, Leo instructing Frank, who had turned into a desert mouse as it was smaller, and better adapted to the heat. Working together, the problem was solved in no time. When they were done, they sat with their backs to the wall, sharing the bottle of water, Leo wolfing down his sandwich and crisps.
âYou need to learn to take breaks,â Frank advised, âYou canât just stay in here all day every day.â
âThe thing is,â Leo said, once heâd swallowed his bite of sandwich, âI feel like Iâm no good to anyone if Iâm not constantly being useful.â
It had taken a while to get to the point where Leo felt like he could tell Frank these things, their friendship had gotten off to a rocky start, but Frank was a good listener- he seemed to know when to keep quiet and when to speak up.
âThatâs why you make jokes,â Frank observed.
Leo nodded, took a swig from the water bottle and handed it to Frank, âPeople keep you around if you can make âem laugh.â
Frank scoffed, âI keep you around in spite of that.â
They laughed.
âBut seriously, dude, you donât need to constantly fight to prove your worth. Youâre family- you should be guaranteed a place here whether youâre always useful or not.â
Nothing in Leoâs life had ever been a guarantee. His mom had died when he was eight. His own blood relatives had cast him out, people who were meant to love and accept him at all costs. Heâd spent most of his childhood running away from foster homes- they were all temporary places for him. Leo had earned his place with the rest of his comrades through his hard work. If he wasnât useful to them would they reject him just like everyone else? He wasnât important. He was the seventh wheel- a useless part of the machine. A spare. An extra.
He told this to Frank.
Frank listened, knitting his eyebrows in thought. After Leo was done, he thought for a moment, and just said, âCars have five wheels.â
Leo stared at him.
âYeah, you got the two front wheels, the two back wheels, and the steering wheel, which is ultimately the most important one.â He drew a box with his arms in the air in front of him, and mimed where the wheels would go. âYouâre the steering wheel, Leo. You drive us along. Yeah, youâre alone, but youâre function is unique, and⊠this metaphor is kinda unravelling, isnât it? Sorry, this probably isnât helping.â
Leo laughed, âLook at you being all technical. Donât come for my job.â
He wagged a finger at Frank in mock-strictness. Frank chuckled. Then he stood up, offering his hand to Leo.
âLetâs get out of here,â He said, âget some sleep, man.â
â â â â â â â â â
Gods, my writing has changed. But I like this fic.
VALZHANG ARMY ARISE!!!
@lokiwiiiiiii @lavenderfairiez @yoshuko-ew @keefessketchbook @frankzhang-appreciation-posts @frayna-of-the-hollow @notwillingtobefound @via-rant
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A Proper Celebration. - Levi x Reader
Summary: Levi's first proper birthday with his first love.
Warnings: Brief mentions of prostitution, Fem reader, not proofread! (Lmk if I missed anything).
A/N: Nothing like getting motivation to write again at 11:42 PM! Scheduling this to post exactly at 12:00 December 25! Happy Holidays everyone! (And happy birthday to my bbg)
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Levi had never cared for Christmas, or rather, his birthday. Being from the underground meant there were no such things as a "proper" celebration. Unless, you wanted to draw more attention to yourself.
Of course, his mother still made an effort to celebrate her baby boy's birthdate. Always trying to make it as special as possible. Sure, maybe a little bit of bread and a small gift might not seem much to the average person. To him however, it was everything. It showed his mother's love and persistence to make him feel special on his special day. Even if that day was usually followed by his mother coming home late or bringing men over to pay debts she made for his birthdate.
After his mother passed and he was taken in by Kenny, birthdays and holidays weren't exactly a priority. Instead of celebration, his days were filled with excessive combat training or stealing. Anything but a proper celebration really.
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So naturally, Levi was caught off guard when he was awoken by his love shuffling around his office carrying a tray of food. "Oh! I'm sorry Levi! Did I wake you? I just wanted to surprise you since it's your birthday after all.. Happy Birthday and Merry Christmas by the way!"
She smiled softly and set the tray down on his desk before frowning a little and massaging his shoulders and neck. "Didn't I tell you to stop sleeping on your desk? You're gonna end up with a sore neck if you continue that."
Levi relaxed into the massage, staring at the food in front of him. A bowl of steaming hot soup paired with a few pieces of bread and hot tea.
"I didn't know they were serving soup today? Eyebrows said we were getting served something else."
"That's because I made it silly! I woke up early to make it for you so you better enjoy it!" She giggled softly.
Levi blushed faintly at the thought of her putting in so much effort just for him.
"Thank you, brat." "Anytime Levi!"
The following hours were both torture yet heaven, he would find gifts around his office all from her, growing more and more adorable and endearing with each passing hour.
He found a new painted tea cup set, chuckling to himself as he saw your "artistic" talent on the cups. He set them aside. Refusing to use them as to not damage them. They were from you after all, they need to be cherished and protected like you.
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In the afternoon, he spent his time in his office signing and reading paperwork even though Erwin gave him a rare day off as it was the Captain's special day.
She burst into the room smiling.
"Heyy Leviiii!!! Can I hangout here for a while?" "Do I have a choice?" "Nope!"
She sat on his desk, raising an eyebrow whilst staring at his work.
"Is Erwin making you work on your birthday? I could've sworn I asked him to give you a day off.."
Levi shakes his head, trying to avoid cracking even a small smile.
"Yes Y/N. He gave me today off. I just chose to complete this sooner rather than later." He said, mentally chuckling at the pout his love gave him.
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"But today's your birthday and it's Christmas Levi! You shouldn't be working..." She stares off into space for a moment. An idea popping into her head. "I should be spending time with you! Put something winter-appropriate on and I'll meet you outside of the bakery we always go to!" She said enthusiastically before running out, not even giving Levi the chance to agree or disagree. As if he'd ever say no to her.
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And that's how Levi ended up inside this lovely bakery. Next to him? His darling love excitedly scanning all the pastries and bread in the store.
"Come on Levi! Pick something out!! There is so much cool and yummy stuff here!!" She eagerly gasps as she looks around the beautifully decorated bakery.
"You seem more eager than me, why don't you pick something out? And I'll pay for it." He suggested, looking around the bakery as well.
Y/N gasps at his suggestion, as if she's offended. "Nooo! It's your birthday! You should pick. And I'll pay for it! You shouldn't be buying your own birthday present."
Levi cracked a slight smile at her protests, before returning to his normal dead face.
"Alright, alright. I'll pick something out. Only because you keep persisting."
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The pair spent the rest of the day looking around the town, occasionally entering a shop to buy something. Both of them went back to the base, hand in hand. Levi carrying the heavy presents while Y/N carried the smaller, lighter, presents.
They sit in front of a roaring fireplace, tea and a shared pasty in front of them. Her head on his shoulder. His hand gripping her waist softly, pulling her close to his warmth.
"I hope you had fun today, Levi. Even though we did nothing too special. I still hope you enjoyed yourself."
"I did, thank you. For everything. For celebrating my birthday and spending time with me. For putting up with my nonsense all this time."
He hesitates to continue, but decided against it.
"And.. thank you, for loving me. Just as much as I love and adore you."
He admits, waiting for her reply. Looking at the fireplace.
His world briefly comes crashing down as he's met with no response. That's it! He took a leap of faith and he instead fell-
Levi hears a few small snores coming from the girl resting her head on his shoulder, body relaxed and asleep. He smiles ever so slightly and kisses the top of her head.
Yeah, Levi would go through hell and back, He would go through all of the shit life has planned for him, as long as it meant that he would be able to spend his god-forsaken life with you. As long as he'd be able to experience nights like this, with you.
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All rights reserved © l0velym1a || Do not copy, translate, alter, repost onto other apps/medias my work without my approval + credit.
#levi ackerman#levi x reader#levi x you#levi aot#levi fluff#levi attack on titan#attack on titan#i need him#birthday#captain levi#levi ackerman x reader#aot fluff#fluff
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âËïœĄâââïœĄËâThe 22nd Day of WritemasâËïœĄâââïœĄËâ
NO WAY. YALLLLLL. The end is near :(. Now I have to work on my character intros and lore drops. Nooooooo. Iâm too lazyyyyy. Oh welll, itâs time to enjoy the last 2 days of writemas!! Today Iâll be using these prompts! If you need to look over at the rules again or want to see what the challenge is all about check out the invite post here!Â
Prompts used:
(Used all of the dialogues, they were just so fitting!!)
Dialogue: âYou would leave me in the cold?" + "It's a time for celebration, wipe that frown from your face." + "How could I be cold when I have you?"
More Melina! I think she is pretty cool and the prompts just really, really, reallllyyyy, fit her today. SO, we are taking a blast back to her past again(for like the 3rd time jeez, but I swear I cannot write for her in present day since she kinda deleted her entire personality and goals and became just a lackey to her Queensman, because she wanted to reset her life over so she doesnât talk a lottt which is kinda lame to read from her POV) to when she became mayor of Elares! She definitely won through fair and non-corrupt means! I mean, it was basically her birthright! Haha, uh, anyway donât think about that too hard ;). Oh no Iâve said too much.
Read about the WIP here!!
Enjoy the slimeball tehe >:)
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The ballroom echoed with joy. Laughter and happiness filled the air as much as heat waves from the above heaters did. A celebration was held in the middle of the Harrier estate. All for Melina and her triumphant victory. Watch out, there was a new sheriff in town, and she knew how to run things smoothly, as in, for her own glory.
She held her win as a badge of honor, boasting about it to every person that came up to her. In the banquet hall, Melina and another girl stood together with interlocked arms in fancy dresses. Though only one of the girls seemed to enjoy the glamourous new title of âMayor of Elaresâ.
Looking down her shoulder to her girlfriend, Astraea, Melina could see that something was bothering her. She knew that it meant something was wrong. The poor girl puts up with so much. Why was it now that she was hesitant? Melina caught odd looks coming their way as Astraeaâs expression saddened further. They had other things to focus on, this would just bring attention away from her victory.
"It's a time for celebration, wipe that frown from your face, dear." Melina smiled with smug eyes staring right into her soul, grabbing onto the back of her arm. Now wasnât the time for feeling sad, Melina had to look the best she ever could be.Â
âMel, you have been ignoring me all night. How can I not be sad? You are dragging me around like a decoration to your accomplishments, as if I had nothing to do with it! Does none of my hard work and support mean nothing to your cold heart?â Astraea whispered sharply in Melinaâs ear, trying to keep her anguished facial expression to a minimum.
Melina smirked wider, "How could I be cold when I have you?â
âPlease, Mel, stop being so rude to me. Why are you all of the sudden changing up on me? Whatâs going on with you?â Astraea pleaded with her partner.
Melina rolled her eyes. Excusing herself from the party temporarily, she walked her girlfriend, hand in hand, out of the estate.
Arriving just outside the doors, Astraea spoke with a stern voice, yet still trying to keep quiet, âWhat did you want to say, would you like to apologize for the way you acted?âÂ
âYeah. No. Sorry, doll, but it looks like weâve run our course. Itâs time for you to go.â Melina said with simplicity, pulling her hand out of her newly made exâs, âIt wasnât going to work anyway, Iâm just climbing the ladder of life while you are doing, whatever you are doing.â
âIâm working on my herbalism fascination. An education like that has got to mean something to someone like you!â
âYes, sure. Whatever you say.â Melina replied callously.
âSo, you would leave me in the cold?" Astraea said, her nectarine voice softly wavering, âI have done nothing to you. Please reconsider!â
Astraea took a step back from her. Melinaâs face turned sour with bitterness. Her words became venom in an instant.
âNeither have you done anything for me. Itâs not hard to understand why I have to let you go. Iâm trying to leave my options open for someone worth the horrible effort that a relationship takes. Relationships, if not controlled and manipulated, can really drag you down in the world. Thatâs not something I really want in my life right now. I have better prospects to get to, along with more people to meet. Really, you are just in the way.â Melinaâs smile faltered a bit to give another condescending addition to her statement, âIf it makes you feel better, I never loved you. You didnât lose someone who cared about you.â
Melina left the girl to wail in sorrow to get back inside, it was her party after all, she had to be there. Impressing people was her responsibility, and, coincidentally, her favorite activity.
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aventurine pl. Plea s e . PLLEEEEEEASE
#â
arin rambles#âhere we go againâ you think everytime you see my ramble tag. I dont blame you#AVENTURINE AVENTURINE PLEASE SAVE ME WHITE BOY#OH MY LORD#OH MY GOODNESS GRACIOUS OH MY GOODNESS.#MY JSOE IS RUNNING HES RUINNING MY LIFE I CANT DO THIS ANYMORE IM SO ILL PLEASE I#AVENTURINE. im so serious i can talk about this man all day. and more specifically this video#âit was just posted 30 minutes ago arin youre scaring the kidsâ SILENCE. I NEED SPACE#I NEED A. A MOMENT. EVERYBODY PLEAS GETA WAY FROM ME IM GOING TO GET SO SCARY#Please. Im so sorry. Im begging you . I love this man oh my gish please hes so cute#HES SO CUTE. HES SO CUTE IM SO SICK OF HIM WHY???????? WHY IS HE SO PRETTY HES SO PRETTY HES GOREGOUS HES SO STUNNING. HELLO. HELLO.#Im going to. Slam my head against the wall im overwhelmed with joy and happiness hes everything ive ever wanted ever#any minute not spent talking about him is a moment wasted i promise you MY PRINCESS IM COMING TO SAVE YOU#IM HIS KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOUR EXCEPT ITS NOT SHINY#IM COVERED IN DIRT#IM STILL COMING FOR YOU AVENTURINE RUN#oh goodness me oh my#im so happy hes so prettu im so happy i cant do rhis im sweating geniumnly i feel so sick#Im cant . Do this anymore. I CANT TAKE IT. I HAVE TO⊠AAUGH⊠AAAHH⊠I HAVE TOâŠ. DANCE!#guysâŠ. he my favorrietâŠ#my slinkyâŠ.. my krimpet⊠my teacup i think. My doc mc stuffins doctor playset. My dishwasher. My italian coldsteel cinquedea . atp anything#hes my EVERYTHING. MY EVERYTHINGâŠ!!!!!!!! *MY TELEKENISIS THROWS EVERYTTHING ACROSS THE ROOM*#yall i dont think ive had a hyperfixation this horribly bad since. Since the. Since. MAN I DONT KNOW#IM COOKED. HE WOMT LEAVE ME ALONE. I LITERALLY DREAMT OF HIM LAST NIGHT LIKE IM SO DOOMED? ACTUALLY?#oh to be medicated and focus on . Things like cooking. Or idk. Getting a job. No i just think about some messed up blonde all day im absolut#ly DOOMED#yes im still yapping i got 30 tags u gon stick through them all. Every single one of them. Dont leave me please i want to talk about him ton#TO SOMEONE. I WANT TO TALK ABOUT HIM TO SOMEONE ALL DAY. ALL MY FRIENDS ARE TESTING. IM LEFT ALONE ALL DAY I JUST WANT TO TALK ABOUT MY WIFE#i womder how crazy i look right now#Sighs lovingly at him..
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Since when did we start charging money on patreon for fanfics đđđđ is this for realđ
hi, love. I haven't seen that many people doing the Patreon thing when it comes to fanfic, but it's pretty common for people who draw for example to set up a Patreon. I believe that everyone who does, just like myself, needs the money. I wouldn't be doing it if i didn't need to. I figured the Patreon setup was the best idea since it's not really that common for people to tip writers, we've been struggling with getting reblogs and comments, so you can imagine.
Right now, I'm applying and doing tests to get an internship, which still won't be enough because I'm also trying to apply for a master's. So, yeah, I'm really thankful for everyone who tipped me on ko-fi and subscribed to my Patreon, last month my savings were over, and the Patreon money was what helped me pay for some medical stuff I needed (Idk if you saw the whole mick schumacher's sick club, but yeah â huge thank you for everyone who subscribed/donated btw).
We often see fic writers as little robots who don't eat, drink, or sleep. We request stuff, and expect an instant reply, and when we get the content we don't even go back to the page to tell the writer our thoughts. We don't reblog, nor leave comments, but still, we expect them to keep writing and keep sharing everything as if it didn't take hours, sometimes days to come up with a 1k piece polished to what we think readers will like best. I hope I don't sound rude, I'm just trying to make a point because I'm tired of seeing writers deactivating, tired of seeing my friends getting writer's block and then people still demanding things.
On top of that, I'm still posting a lot here, from smau to blubs and long fic requests (and I won't even talk about how some pieces aren't even getting a hundred notes, which always makes me wonder if I'm doing something wrong, if my writing is bad, or if there's anything that I could do to make the reader's experience more enjoyable), and it takes a lot of time, it's even harder to balance the two profiles now, but still, I keep sharing some of my work for free. so please, please, don't make me feel bad about needing money. thanks â€ïž.
#I'm still searching like crazy for the best internship that gives me enough time to study for my application and enough money to pay for +#the stuff that I really need#medical bills are expensive#school books and stuff are expensive#we do what we can#and I say we including other writers that relly on donations too#anyways#Im sorry for letting my heart run wild here but I really needed to share this because I'm tired#and I do feel a bit guilty some days for sharing paid stuff because I wanted everyone to read what I post#wanted everyone to enjoy it and gush with me about college!mick and ghost!lewis and so on#but right now that's the best way I found to deal with my current situation#so please please try seeing your writers side#and on top of that make sure youre supporting the people that are here everyday putting their hearts on each piece#and I mean support as in reblog and let them know you liked it and so on#if you can support someone with money thats great#but most of the times a comment and a reblog will make the writers days#it makes mine#I wish you guys could see the smile on my face whenever someone comes back like âhey Im the one who requested x and I loved itâ#anyways Im sorry for ranting#I hope I did not come across as rude again#and Im not saying you don't reblog or support your writers this is more of a widely rant#<3#millies inbox#anon#patreon#f1 fandom
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okay. TW for implied sexual violence. but like you kinda gotta read between the lines.
Park:
Just got off the phone with someone I know in the states. The Truman show delusion is really bad for me, but I said that I would keep my US number on till the 12, even though it's like 6 dollars a day. And I would do that for most people I guess. He was like. He exists. When I talk to him on the phone, I hear his voice. this is worse.
Vent:
đ„, I really wanted it to happen again. I liked the way đ„ looked at me, and I liked the way you could see that đ„ was thinking. It didn't seem unfair, looking back I understand more, but there was no betrayal or anything. It was like I poked the bear. I had... fun. it felt really good, but that's kinda why it was fucked up. I feel like everyone can see me all the time, like they can just think about me and know what I'm doing. Friday helps by narrating what the crowd of sometimes specific people are taking about. But I think it's just a feeling, Friday helps give insight though.
ă°ïž:
I look for â everywhere, I saw her in đ„, I see her in everybody. When I got to know đ„ better I realized they were pretty different and liked them both. I didn't think â and I ever expected eachother to be committed or anything, or four the to be any sure if relationship beyond what happened. nobody in the system believes me that she existed. Nobody believes 'Vent' about đ„ either. It's hard to keep faith that â is even alive, it seems unlikely. I didn't think either of them would like present day us very much either. I'm suprised the guy who we talked on the phone with still talks to us, I think it's more of a convenience thing. I had a lot of questions to ask â. I never really got the chance, or I was to scared. I really wanted to ask her if she believed in God and what her God what like. I think she would've thought I was joking. The other alters think it's all metaphor, that it's me latching onto stories. They're the ones that actually believe the Truman show shit idk why I'm the fucking crazy one for being like "u know how we have the forget you childhood trauma disorder? well there were some people we forgot". I always back up other alters when they come forward with stories or forgotten faces, but they never return the trust, the integrity. It's like I'm just the fucking crazy girl. I feel so fucking alone without her, even after learning about how people get endoctrinated into this kinda stuff I still feel like my parents should have understood, that they were choosing to do that to me. like, Abraham didn't have to bring Isaac up the mountain, he could've said "my God would never make someone do that, my God wouldn't want me to kill my child." but I bet he was excited to try. And I bet he'd wanted to before. I don't even like that God, That's the God they were always saying was my God. They never told me about the Bible or much about Jesus or anything. And they told me so many lies. They didn't like the Bible, but it had to be that one because they mentioned Jesus. We never even went to church. A few years ago I was looking through a box of my mom's things and found out id been promised to the Evangelicals. its not the same as a baptism, I think it might have been for my grandparents or something. It's not like this was some long running family thing, like why did this happen? Who's God were you serving? was it anyone's at all? it sometimes felt like you really did believe what you were saying. I blame the internet.
Love:
I keep thinking he's fucking outside my fucking door. I think he's an introject of â. He keeps telling me real and he's coming to save me. he keeps telling me to do things. So many of my alters just ask me to do things. When they're not fronting, they like to sit next to me and lie about everything. Sometimes It's like I back up and I can see the shape of this whole thing, these parts that don't have so much control, just working with old tools, ticking clocks, old mindsets. Im embarrassingly dependant on him. I just remembered a section of the innerworld, some bit of story but I didn't remember the context. some post apocalypse or woods outside of a war zone... I think didn't starve characters are involved smh. teen getting his face pressed to a grill over a fire. I HEAR LAUGHING ALL THE TIME OUTSIDE, normal but the timing always seems... well timed! Every time I hear it. Since he woke up last November I've associated Friday with laughter, not always good. I was in the hospital and there was a guy laughing, like uncontrollable joker-type laughing, I was so convinced it was him, because it started after I had thought about him laughing! Everything just seems so connected. Whenever I look outside or open the door he's never there. I think it might be the audience messing with me, everyone has decided I don't deserve to balance on the tightrope, so they shake it. and I'm so scared. Nothing makes sense. There's a dead snake in the road. My eardrums are blown out like daisies. I'm growing crystals in my throat, purple. People don't bleed, that's a myth. You soft boys love to beat people with your pillow fists, claiming physics isn't real, claiming the lion is the winner, claiming teeth never dull, claiming claiming claiming. I want to rip your feathers out with my teeth, make you incapable of flight. I'm so jealous that you all get wings. These flashbacks are so embarrassing, full body plays, I just feel like a nymphomaniac. I'm so tired of it all being so serious. đ„ was nice because Vent got to say what she/he always wanted to say, no punishment, love like how the tires love the road enough that the bones break and the organs spread like butter. as opposed to an impact, to a hunt, to photographs of dead bodies in snow, like the cold was the killer when really the killer was warm. It's all just an means to an end with this kinda stuff. Friday said that after it happened đ„ noticed rope burns on our wrists, but that đ„ was uninvolved. I don't remember ever having rope burns, but someone drew a picture once. We were older in that picture than Vent is implying though. The guy we just got off the phone with reminds me of â too. but in a weird way I'm not used to. I think we're forgetting her, we've always been forgetting. but I think it's to the point now where there's barely any left at all. I know that's not what everyone says, I'm sure ă°ïž disagrees. Idk if she really existed anyway. Idk if any of this stuff is real, or just another means to some unknown end.
Last four lines of Tulips by Sylvia Plath
"And I am aware of my heart: it opens and closes
Its bowl of red blooms out of sheer love of me.
The water I taste is warm and salt, like the sea,
And comes from a country far away as health."
as I get older the meaning I take changes, but my favorite line has always been "And I'm aware of my heart: it opens and closes"
I wanted to get it tattooed on the outside of my shoulder for a while. like sort of American traditional style but just the line art, and then the red roses. But idk. what if someone skins it off of me or something.
#syst#i feel like i needed to post this so. sorry. if this runs your day or life or something#Ill probably delete it or make it private later
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well this is what ive been doing for the past 2 weeks
#sorry for using chrome. drive sucks on firefox. i use firefox for everything else. literally it's open right next to this for other shit#so what im doing is making a list of every creature you ever encounter in dai (that part is complete. it took a week)#and making note of its important stats and now its chance of each elemental immunity with the walk softly trial on#because i am genuinely planning that solo nightmare all trials run and the most important thing is making sure i can actually hit everythin#you will notice that NOTHING is EVER immune to spirit damage. that is due to a bug that i personally discovered in the trial implementation#the only creatures that can gain immunity to spirit through the trial are cretahl and hurlock alphas (only the ones in the descent)#and the only creatures naturally immune to spirit are in dlc (mostly trespasser but some in the other dlc too)#so basically what this means is that you NEED spirit runes lmao. or i guess runes to damage specific types of enemy#the least likely immunity of the three core elements is electric which is good because chain lightning is VERY powerful for solo runs#you've just gotta be mindful of hitting yourself because friendly fire WILL be on for this run fml#oh so those percentages arent technically correct. they're inflated for most creatures#for normal-ranked creatures (rank 0) there's a 20% chance they'll be promoted to elite (rank 1) and then all elites--#(whether promoted to elite or already elite) have that chance of immunity. so you can divide them by 5 for normal-ranked creatures#except for the 100% ones. those are from preexisting immunities#yes im putting way too much thought into all of this. i went into the all trials and the solo nightmare runs without doing too much work#it's just that on nightmare you get FULL immunities and with no companions you've gotta make sure you can deal with that#because you might end up in a situation where you just cant damage something AT ALL#(a good reason to diversify your abilities. also you CAN damage them it's just capped at 1 damage per hit)#and no abilities that decrease resistances help because an immunity is +1000% resistance and nothing comes close to getting that under 100#im having fun at least. i wouldnt keep doing this if it was too boring#some of it has been tedious (especially going through some of the areas with dozens of the same enemy) but ultimately feels worth it#the spreadsheet has 5678 lines ftr. fortunately around 2.5k are npcs so i dont have to do anything more with them#anyway. i usually post about what da-related thing im up to every now and then and it's been ages so i thought id give an update lmao#personal#da#dai#undescribed#there are also a lot of interesting things like. you'll see that poison spiders CANT be immune to nature damage#and that's because it wont apply an immunity if the creature is already immune to that element OR its associated effect#so poison spiders arent immune to nature damage but they ARE immune to poison so they wont gain nature immunity from the trial
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Trying? Trying??? By learning. By succeeding!
(about this and my text under the cut)
this is very nice actually thank you so much <3 <3 and like, i probably do need to give myself more credit in general but also i am still very much learning and stumbling and figuring digital art out (and for the most part it is so fun)
Iâm gonna ramble about this a bit so bear with me and also i apologize lol, but that art was done after a month of getting increasingly more frustrated with everything turning out so badly and eventually realizing that I was trying to 1. copy a certain look/style that iâve internalized is what fanart and digital art should look like and is very far away from my style/comfort zone 2. i was trying to do everything digital allows without being comfortable with it or understanding it
so (and this took me a month to realize ? ??) i did what i already knew from doing acrylic and oil painting in the past and could somewhat easily transfer to digital without having to know more than the basics, like i didnât use a lot of the things digital provides or allows for. i used layers for my own peace of mind but without actually needing them and did some color adjusting (honestly, the color adjusting digital lets you do is such a blessing to me) but the only fancy way i really utilized the medium was making it a gif (which is so fun and a lot easier than i would have thought, like honestly watch me make any future art into gifs too) but there are so many things you can do with the medium with settings/effects, different brushes, tools to use in the process etc that i just do not understand what they are or how to implement them so i am very slowly learning digital art as a whole new medium rather than just being able to use it to adapt what i already know
#sorry you just wanted to say a quick thing and i went on a whole rant (welcome to my blog tbh)#like i'll watch tutorials and they'll be like 'and i just did an overlay and then a multiply layer in a good color (:' and im like ??? wdym#'a good color' what color is a good color? like i can put those effects on my work but that's just me clicking a button without knowing wha#will happen really and like i watch speed paints and see them do stuff and im just ? HUH? what was that and why?#i also do not understand a lot of these concepts with traditional art tbh like people will talk about under paintings and im like yeah sure#i hear you however i also do not- i just place a color where it should be and that's that which i know is why my colors often don't feel#cohesive which is also something i need to learn which is blah- im basically just saying i actually do not know any theory or technique#even with traditional it is all just vibes and hoping for the best which in the long run just makes me very confused about what i am#actually doing and not confident at all i'll be able to do it again so u know#we're out here literally just raw dogging art without any thought#but it's also just i do not need to do all those fancy things but i would like to understand them and i am excited to see my progress now#i just really had a shitty month of making ugly things up until now okay so i was a little fragile when i posted that#but people have been so so nice about it and ive been crying for two days straight#also people have been so lovely about the colors and colors are deadass the hardest part about digital like with paint you often buy a set#that already match and then mix them if needed and they'll look nice together but with digital you're just on your own- no training wheels#ask#anon
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âyeah like, I mean YES, big time.
but also like, as a capital letters fine artist or whatever Iâve always found that the biggest thing other that having friends who get your work and will tell you if they think you arenât hitting the nail on the head, and who will work with you through it till you have the best art you can make in the moment, is having a stranger see/experience your art and understand it and love it. and if they want to buy it and have it in their house itâs a very special feeling.
but in the way we used to do things you donât need a 100 000 people to look at your work for that to happen, ypu just need the right handful of people to see it.
so like I donât recommend taking advice on how to get an audience from a tiktoker or someone that has a bunch of really fancy shit in their studio or whatever because to get that kind of money on tiktok you have to be creating content constantly and likeâŠthe attention wonât be on the art youâre trying to make, it will be on the cool studio you have and what brand of marker youâre using and product product productâŠand look this is absolutely not a critique of those people but if youâre making art because you want someone to pick it up and hold it in their hands and treat it like it means so much that you said something that resonates so deeply with themâŠI think you need to be thinking âhow do I get to a place where the right people can see my art in person or justâŠthat that person will see my workâŠâ because the answer may not be on the internet with a bunch of followers, it might be through a local artist run initiative in your city or a zine distro or any number of other local, artist run spaces where people can look at your work in person
i'm still thinking about that post i reblogged earlier about art and wanting attention/connection and i really do think, personally, that having three friends who genuinely love your art and will tell you details they like is more meaningful and desirable than 100,000 followers who interact silently. if im confident in my art now, it's because i was lucky enough to have small groups of friends who encouraged me and helped me get there when i was mega-demoralized in my art
#sorry I just did some stretches and so I donât know if this has anything to do with your post OP#*just did some stretches and fried my brain#byt I will say that some of the best friends I have ever made were through local art stuff so likeâŠyou know#and even if youâre travelling like one time I was in hobart for a weekend when they were having a zine fair#and I had conveniently run a little zine workshop in another city the day before so I made up some tiny zines and#went to the fair and met some lovely people#and I did zine swaps#for other peopleâs zines#so yeah#that kind of connection is so valuable and wonderful and good#also please Iâm begging young artists to get into art swaps#most of my art collection wasnât biught with money#itâs great to swap art and it just feels so nice#not everything is about comments or hits or money#yes we need to be able to eat but there is so much being missed if we arenât also building community
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playing dmc1 with my earbuds in (but on low volume bc they're being weird) while my roommate and her shitty bf argue. i feel like i'm recreating the very specific experience of some child of divorce out there
#how do i tell her she needs to break up with him immediately. posthaste.fuck it funny post over rant incoming tw emotional abuse i think#nyarla dni#(<- roomie and nyarla have met and i don't wanna air roomie's drama to ppl who know her w/o her consent. anon internet ppl only)#listen i'm normally for gentle advising and that's probably what i'll do since i don't want to stress her out but oh my fucking god what is#his problem. he's constantly putting her in these weird no-win situations where the only right answer is to never be upset or disagree or b#wrong on accident or be misunderstood by him and to tell him everything she's feeling so she's not 'playing mind games' but if she says wha#she's feeling he'll interrogate her and badger her with the same questions over and over again insisting she's unreasonable until she gives#in and says she's sorry with an attitude he likes. i fucking don't like him. and a lot of this is observations from today. the day after sh#GOT INTO A CAR ACCIDENT AND BROKE HER NECK. WHAT THE FUCK.#it's like he expects to be treated like a king on one of the worst days of her life and when she's upset he's like OH. OH I GET IT.#and lectures her on having attitude and taking things out on others when she's literally not even doing that. not to an extent that matters#anyway. like. there's more productive ways of dealing with that. where you don't treat them like a bad kid for getting overwhelmed#he has made her cry multiple times today. i have been around multiple arguments and fights and he's just genuinely. awful i hate him#hell the first argument i overheard *i* was in tears by the end (luckily they left soon after bc i had to run to the basement laundry#dungeon to bawl my eyes out because 1. i can't handle confrontation 2. i've never seen roomie cry and 3. she just seemed so hurt and tired)#anyway he just left again after a fight because. god this is so dumb. she told him to move while they were sleeping in the same twin bed#(remember she's in a neck brace) and he fucking. left the room for an HOUR bc he thought the only thing that could POSSIBLY mean (as he#insisted) was for him to get out of here and then when she was like oh hey i'm sorry i didn't mean it like that he decided to spend the nex#half hour of his short time on this earth chewing her out for not giving him a lengthy explanation while half-asleep as to like. why he#needed to move (she wanted to grab smth) and apparently he sat in the chair by her bed for like 10 mins before leaving so he probably saw#her fall back asleep. and then he got pissy when after he left she didn't pick up her phone when he was calling her? even though he knew sh#was asleep?? she didn't even know he was gone. fucking. i need to get him away from my roomie YESTERDAY#look. miscommunication happens. i'm not saying he's an asshole for wanting things said clearly. i am pro-saying what you mean.#but if every time your gf tells you what she means you make it into a 30 minute lecture (no matter how small the slight and w/o examining i#you're actually right or not) she's not gonna wanna fucking tell you if she doesn't think it's worth the argument. especially if you never#let her rest until she concedes. apology isn't enough. clarification isn't enough. she has to say how wrong she was and beg and GOD. UGHHH#and he's always on about how she hurts his feelings. a gust of wind could hurt his feelings. he's constantly berating her manipulating her#and then he's like >:( see that hurt my feelings you can't hurt ppl's feelings. you're disrespectful. HE"S THE WORST I FUCKING HATE HIM#look sometimes adversity reveals the truth of a person and this just amplified his shittiness so much. mr OH i slept in a HOSPITAL and it#was so bad... you can't be in a bad mood bc i've been doing the bare minimum and you need to prioritize MY feelings rn. also i won't leave
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complementary - the physics of your body [part 1] (sjy)
pairing: brother's best friend!jake x afab!reader
synopsis: The thermodynamics of your bodies together, the sound wave of your moans, the gravity that pulled you towards each other. You were a perfect combination, the right equilibrium, complementary.
my's note: i had to break this work into two parts due to the size of it, i'm so sorry. i'll post the part 2 in a few days! my longest (and dirtiest) work lol. i used some physics concepts but funny thing hah i know nothing about physics SO PLEASE don't think too much into it... also don't know if i'd commit this much with a fic if wasn't for ari freaking out whenever I teased to add something new so please everyone say thank you ari! <3 on a side note: this is especially for her. i love you, ari đ
warnings: mention of trauma from parents, jay is y/nâs older brother, jake is jay's best friend and three years older than the reader, physics stuff lol, reader blushing/turning red!, drama/arguments, fluff, angst a little (with happy ending!!), pet names (babe, doll, good girl...) SMUT - so minors DO NOT interact!, unprotected sex (donât do it!!!), oral (m.), choking, jk cum inside, gag, overstimulation (m.). lmk if i missed something!
wc: 27k.
NOT PROOFREAD.
taglist đ: @yvnempire, @marigold-sunflowers
âI know that delaying it seemed the right thing to do at the time, but I donât think you can run away from physics anymore, kiddo.â
As your eyes rolled, annoyed with the nickname, you smacked the pizza dough into the cold marble, kneading it to make it perfectly soft. The inner core of your stomach tightened with the reminder, bringing a bitter taste on the back of your throat that made you gulp.
âIâm literally in my second year in college and youâre still calling me that.â
Your muttered words elicited an immediate laugh from Jay, your big brother, who had his body resting on the door frame while watching you across the kitchen, panicking over the fact that you would finally have to deal with your biggest fear in school, by choosing to randomly make pizza at 4pm on a thursday.
âIt helps me to destress,â you explained once. âTo smack something thatâs not someoneâs face.â
âYouâd always be my kiddo,â he answered back fondly, yet with a hint of mocking, as he moved to sit at the kitchen peninsula chair.Â
Jay never really raised a question over your decisions and behaviors, applauding and supporting you every time while shooting loving eyes towards you whenever you were around doing your silly little things; just like now, as he followed your movements, a bit concerned with your deep frown and how quickly your hands worked on the dough, but nearby just in case you needed some help.
Over the years, the two of you shared a strong, healthy bond, especially within the walls of the house you grew up in.
Having wealthy parents came with its perks and its drawbacks, but for you, the drawbacks often outweighed the rest. Pursuing a dream that didnât align with your dadâs expectations felt almost like a betrayal of your familyâs values, as if you were intentionally choosing to disappoint them by turning away from the prospect of becoming a doctor, lawyer, or even a future CEO of the family company.
Some would say you were crazy for challenging yourself into a rougher path, giving away the possibilities of a stable life to pursue your real dreams. However, it didnât sound right for you to live a life without your wills being the main worry of it, forcing yourself to fit a model instead of creating your own.
Amidst the chaos you grew up in, Jay was always there to hold you close and feel proud with your achievements, protecting and looking after you.
He would drive you to your classes every morning when he started high school and you were still finishing middle school, buy you expensive gifts, and take you to fancy restaurants for your birthday. He always had his bedroomâs door unlocked for you to come when you felt like crying in the middle of the night because of something shitty your parents screamed at you. He never minded skipping work or classes if it meant staying home to take care of you when you were sick. And he had no issue scaring away any guy who, in his eyes, never seemed to be worthy enough of you.
You couldnât help but laugh whenever his protective tactics worked, knowing that, deep down, your brother was just a big softie, never ever daring to kill an insect and crying over romantic movies.
Moving in with him always sounded right, it was part of your big plans; finish school, get into college and share an apartment with your brother, who would be just wrapping up his own studies.
Jay offered you the reliability you needed.
He was three years older than you, now working as a CEO in one of your familyâs company subsidiaries after finishing administration school, and tried his best to give you everything you wanted and needed to live a good, comfortable life at least until you achieved your goal and stability by yourself, not wanting for your to do side jobs and focus only on studying.
Jay never cared much about doing it for him, choosing to pamper you to the brim without asking for anything back, even though you unconsciously paid with your happiness.
Due to your tough relationship with your parents, you never really took it for granted, working hard to keep yourself steady enough to live alone if you need to â Jay, on the other hand, would move mountains for that never to happen.
Jay fought for his place in the world with a little less struggle than you, and he blamed himself for it to some extent.
Your parents beamed with joy when he announced he would be studying business administration; you still remember that night of celebration, with your father practically glowing with happiness â the kind of happiness you knew you would never be able to give him, since you wanted to follow the artistic path of the spectrum.
Eventually, with your decisionâs outcome, Jay made it his mission to take care of both of you, because he understood that life had been unfair to you. It wasnât your fault that you didnât want to follow the pattern they had set out for you based only on their expectations. You didnât deserve to hear the hurtful words your parents threw at you, expressing their disappointment and sadness over who you had become.
Jay, however, admired the incredible woman you had turned into, in awe of your strength to keep fighting for your dreams, and he worked tirelessly to ensure you were safe, sound, and happy.
Now, you were in your second year in college, studying fine arts with Jayâs unwavering financial support; he offered you a comfortable place to live, covered your tuition and fees, food, clothes, and even your materials and books without bothering to ask for anything back in return.
The only thing he wanted was for you to concentrate on your studies and be happy.
And focus you did, although you had postponed as much as you could to finish a part of the core curriculum.
After everything you had been through, you could honestly say that physics was your biggest â and most frustrating â enemy.Â
You hated physics with passion, never understanding why the fuck you had to study it.
The speed of the light? Why bother? You would never use it to measure anything in your everyday life anyway. And gravity? Yeah, you knew it kept you grounded on Earth, but it sure didnât help you keep your steps steady. You were constantly tripping over your own feet.
It just never made sense to you. It only made you want to scream in frustration, tearing at your hair with every weird equation and choice of words to explain annoying, bullshit stuff.
âI just hate physics,â you groaned, breath heavy as your anger increased; a few strands of hair fell messily across your face, making the whole situation worse. âI hate it,â you muttered, punching the dough harder. Jay laughed. âHate it, hate it, hate it!â You repeated, each word punctuated by another angry smack against the poor pizza dough.
Jay, trying to hide his grin, shook his head. "I donât think the pizza dough has anything to do with your physics situation," he teased.
As much as he loved you, he was your brother and would always find a way to taunt your nerves before really offering a helping hand.Â
A deep sigh escaped your lips as you fluttered your eyes close and threw your head back. You could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, a mix of irritation and helplessness washing over you working as a perfect mix to send you to the edge of losing control, and you wondered why you got so triggered over such a trivial thing.
Then, it clicked. Of course, trauma from your parents.Â
You had always pushed yourself over the limit to be better, to get the highest grades and do your absolute best in school, only to feel frustrated when you couldnât achieve perfection.
In your parentsâ eyes, you would never be good enough no matter how many perfect scores you aced on exams and assignments.
In college, despite moving out of their house and ending contact almost entirely, you still held yourself to the same impossible standards, sometimes even worse.
Confronting a subject where you knew you couldnât be the best felt like a trigger, a reminder of everything you had been told over the years.
Useless. Incapable. Insufficient.
You automatically remembered last night, when you sat at your desk, eyes wandering over the physics textbooks sprawled open on the surface, words coming in a blur. You couldnât pinpoint when exactly it was due to your incapacity to understand them or to your tears that flowed easily after some minutes sitting in trance.
The weight was almost suffocating and you called it a day when your hands started to tremble and your body ached for rest, feeling extra tired just by⊠staring.
You rested your hips on the cold marble, blinking your eyelids open to glance at your brother. He had now a softened expression, calm and fond, hands comfortably placed on the countertop.
âI think Iâm just oversensitive,â you said, voice barely above a whisper as your hands now played with the dough absentmindedly, eyes slowly lowering to watch how your fingers disappeared into the soft white mixture. âYâknow, our parents theyâŠâ You trailed off, not really wanting to verbalize your thoughts.
âYeah,â Jay nodded, sighing. The knot in his heart tightened seeing you so pouty, understanding from how deep and particular your frustration came. âListen, I know you hate it, but you have to at least do the minimum to pass. You donât have to ace it all.â Jay spoke while standing up to wrap around the counter and stand by your side, his body resting on the counter as well.Â
You leaned into the touch when he caressed your hair, your whole body shifting to a less tense figure.
Jay tilted his head forward enough to search for your sad, puppy eyes. Suddenly, an insight crossed his mind and his lips curved into a smile.
âI have a friend,â he said and you finally glanced at him. The unexpected mention of his friend and how he sounded like having a great idea sparking your curiosity. âI think heâd love to help you.â
âSo, I invited the guys over,â Jay said while placing some beers on the minifridge near the entrance of your shared living room. You were standing up awkwardly in the middle of the room, eyes following Jayâs excited figure as he organized the house to welcome his friends. âAnd while me, Heeseung and Sunghoon do something fun, you and Jake can do the boring stuff.â
Jay had a plan, a solid one. And in any other circumstance you wouldnât be so nervous about it.Â
It was just another regular Friday. It was also routine for you to go out with your friends to some bar, club, or even have a girls' night at someone's house, while Jay would head to the house his friends shared.
Jay always used the excuse that he would rather keep the house free for you or not bother you, especially on those nights when you would choose to stay home to relax or study, though part of you suspected that sometimes he was actually heading to a girl's house and just didnât want to tell you.
Either way, today felt different.
It all started with him inviting the guys over to his place instead of the other way around, followed by a surprisingly sweet request for you to stay in and not go anywhere.
Soon after, he revealed his plan: he, Sunghoon, and Heeseung would play video games in the living room while you and Jake studied physics in some other corner of the house. He promised they would keep the noise down so as not to disturb you.
As said before, in any other situation you wouldnât be reacting the way you were; hands sweating, heart pumping loudly in your eardrums, head spinning. But in other situations there was no Jake in the equation.
Sim fucking Jaeyun, also known as Jake, was one of Jayâs closest friends, acting as much as siblings as you two.
They met in school and hadn't left each otherâs side ever since, sharing hundreds of stories together, with a bunch of adventures and countless funny moments. You closely watched them grow up and accomplish things side by side, constantly attending Jake's birthday parties and other of his familyâs events, even participating vividly on some of the âboyâs nightâ in your house where you crushed them in the video games they choose to play, always eliciting surprised sounds from Jake followed by compliments excitedly said, that, at some point, started to make you feel things.
When Jay moved out to start college, you were left alone at the house that aimed to destroy your dreams and, indirectly, you, having to deal with a lot on your own, constantly hearing the harsh words from your parents and having to lower your head without the courage to fight back, because Jay wasnât there to defend you anymore.
Jayâs routine became heavy, as he landed an internship early during his second year that consumed most of his time, barely having minutes to talk to you over the phone, moments where you opted to listen to his news and college life instead of filling him with your teenager suffering bullshit.Â
On the other hand, Jake, who was also in college, had way more free time. Whenever he went back to visit his own parents, he would set a time to take you out on weekends, helping you clear your head by treating you with some ice cream and any other snacks you wanted while listening to your concerns.
You grew really close to Jake during your high school years, noticing the genuine attention he gave you. Jake would always be close to you as a protective older brother, someone who looked out for you and took good care of you, a very trustworthy and sincere friend.
And yet, you always, always felt guilty for letting your feelings for him go beyond âjust friends.â
Jake was the same age as Jay â three years older than you, three years more experienced, three years more everything. He was, now, a man. A very attractive, hot, appealing man.Â
You had the chance to watch Jake grow up right before your eyes, transforming from a good-looking teenager into a charming young man. He had an irresistible smile, warm brown eyes that radiated kindness and sweetness, and a genuine aura that permeated his personality â always wanting to help others in the most caring way possible.
He was friendly, easygoing, sociable, and intelligent.
And when you saw him blossom, it was impossible not to feel completely captivated.
You vividly remember the time your brother posted a photo with his friends at the beach, and there was Jake, shirtless, showing off his toned, slightly sun-kissed body to the world. At that time you were already in your first year of college, while he was finishing up his own studies deep into the engineer life he chose to live.Â
Your relationship had cooled off a bit, as his academic demands increased and his visits became less frequent, until you eventually moved in with your brother. You assumed you would see Jake more often, but, for reasons unknown, Jay rarely invited his friends over to visit and Jake never really reached out for you.
It became awkward.
You attended parties with your brother and met Sunghoon and Heeseung, Jayâs college friends, that created a unique bond despite having known each other for less time. The four of them became as close as family, and Jay made sure his friends knew you in order to keep you safe when he wasnât around, constantly allowing them to pick you up on your way back home due to some unexpected schedule that kept him from doing it himself, for instance.
Jake, however, became distant. He would always have excuses not to do any of that and whenever you saw him at parties, he would at most give you a forced smile and a slight, polite nod, quickly diverting his path and avoiding you for the rest of the night.
It was painful in a way, especially since now that you were grown you realized your chances with him might actually be within reach.Â
As a teenager, your crush was as subtle as possible, aware that neither Jake nor Jay would ever approve of any kind of relationship between the two of you, so you never truly considered anything happening.
But now you had become a woman. And a relatively attractive one, if you did say so yourself. So, just as physics had never made sense to you, Jakeâs reaction to your presence had become just as baffling, until eventually you buried your feelings completely and moved on.
At least, thatâs what you thought â until Jay came up with this wild idea of having Jake as your physics tutor.
You gulped down your nervousness for the probably ninetieth time, now intensified by the bell ringing. Jay was in the bathroom and shouted for you to open the front door, saying it was the guys that had arrived.
As you made your way towards the entrance, your legs felt wobbly and your heart was racing fast as you clutched the doorâs knob. You took a deep breath, silently counting to ten before finally turning the handle.
âY/N!â Heeseung was the first to greet you with his usual bright smile, wrapping you immediately with his long arms in a tight hug, not minding that he carried some bags with his hands or that they clashed against your back. His blonde hair was perfectly parted, giving a very enticing aura to his already charming presence.Â
You smiled in response, warmed by his sweet embrace. By his side stood Sunghoon, his dark hair and thick brows framing his pale face perfectly. His cheeks rounded up as he gave you a shy, endearing smile before pulling you into his own hug.
âMissed you,â he muttered softly against your hair and you chuckled, squeezing him just a bit tighter before stepping back.
âYou guys never come to see me, so I donât know whoâs really missing who here,â you shot back with a teasing grin, pretending to pout as you moved away from Sunghoon, almost forgetting about the third presence standing behind them in the hallway.Â
After hearing their laughs and letting them in, your eyes flickered to the man awkwardly waiting for the interaction between the three of you to settle. Your breath hitched when your gaze met his, and you had to dig self control from the depths of your mind not to overreact.Â
Jake was as handsome as ever.
He was casually dressed in a leather jacket over a white shirt and distressed jeans that seemed to fit him almost too perfectly. Effortlessly good, rough and soft just like your heart enjoyed, which was beating loudly in your ribcage, enough for you to fear to be heard even with the noises from the other two who had just entered your house and were greeting Jay.Â
âHey,â Jake managed to say without giving you a proper look, eyes avoiding your figure at all costs.Â
âHey,â you replied with a forced small smile, stepping back to give him space to pass through, even though there was more than enough. You felt like it would be like that the whole night: awkward and distant. And it only increased your anxiety.
As you closed the door, feet glued on the ground, you wondered if it would be harder to understand anything physics related or to deal with Jakeâs presence. The only coherent answer you found was that either would be a pain in the ass, and you would be the one getting fucked at the end. Emotionally and academically.Â
Watching them settling into your apartment, comfortably lounging on your couch while laughing and drinking the beer Jay served, you couldnât help but think when exactly the whole tutoring thing would start. You waited for someone to bring it up, because although it seemed like a good idea, your inner self had doubts about your own reaction when being in a place alone with Jake and had no plans to pursue or engage it.
The couchâs armrest had never felt so awkwardly uncomfortable as you sat there, listening to the endless, nonchalant chatter around you. One of your arms rested on the back of the couch, propping up your head as your eyes shifted between Jake and the others. Whenever he caught you staring, you quickly averted your gaze, pretending to act like you werenât a bundle of nerves just being in the same room with him.
Heeseung was the one near you, casually using your legs as a makeshift support to his own arm, and Jay sat beside him, completely indifferent to Heeseung's touchy nature â it became routine, to some extent.
Sunghoon and Jake took place on the smaller couch opposite to you, Jake smiling along to the conversation while adding his own points to the whatever story they were telling and Sunghoon laughter filling the room.Â
You always found it amusing how Sunghoon seemed to be the reserved one, but when he was with his friends he was definitely the loudest.
Heeseung and you grew closer than you expected, often being the one giving you rides home, even raising some suspicions among your friends about being your boyfriend. As nice, gentle and charming he was, you never saw yourself having feelings for or even dating him.
Not when Jake was on the equation.
What?
âBut hey, Jake,â Heeseung suddenly cut the topic and gave a quick squeeze on your thigh. âWerenât you supposed to be helping Y/N with her studies?â
A cold chill immediately filled your belly and you froze in place, the smile lingering on your lips by listening to their funny chatter fading slowly as you lifted your gaze to Jake. Heeseung was innocently asking, but it caused your stomach to flip a whole 360, and the room was now dividing looks between you two.
You watched as Jakeâs expression faltered for just a moment, then quickly returned to his usual easy going demeanor. Before he said anything in response, Jay took the front of it.
âOh, thatâs right,â Jay said, leaning back into the couch with a teasing grin. âI asked you to help my sister, not come here to drink my beer and lounge on my expensive couch.â
You wanted to sink into the floor, or at least disappear. Jake shifted uncomfortably, the smallest hint of a smile on his lips though you could clearly tell he was faking it. Jayâs obliviousness only made it worse, as if he couldnât even sense the awkwardness between you and Jake.
There was no blame on him, though, especially because no one expected any type of tension between any of you.Â
You shot a quick glance at Jake again, who was avoiding your gaze once more, and all of a sudden the room felt too small, too crowded, as if the space around you was closing in, sinking you deep into a pool of anxiety.Â
âYou donât have to bother, really,â your voice filled the room, words waving weirdly in the air. You let out a mild chuckle, pushing yourself from your seating to stand up. âIâll go to my room, so you guys can hangââ
âHey, no way,â Jay interrupted your attempt of running away, frowning and lifting his beer bottle to point it at you, yet blind to the real atmosphere unfolding. âDonât try to escape from physics, kiddo.â
Heeseungâs small snort followed Jay's words, giving you teasing glinted eyes before remarking, his lips against his beer bottle. âYeah, Y/N. Youâve been avoiding it for Godâs know how long.âÂ
Somehow Heeseungâs choice of words seemed to light up a strange feeling in your chest, as if he was reading beyond reality, slightly aware of the you and Jake situation â to begin with, there was no you and Jake situation. No way he would say that about your relationship with physics alone. Anyway, your cheeks warmed instantly, your eyes wavering to any other place rather than the rest of the people sharing that abruptly small space with you.
âI think the kitchen is far enough for you both,â Sunghoon quickly added with a relaxed nod, sipping on his beer. âWe promise not to be loud, yeah?â He smirked, completely aware he was the loudest in the house so far.Â
You chuckled, switching your weight on your foot. âI canât believe it when youâre the one saying it,â you teased back, eliciting an immediate laugh from Sunghoon. âBut yeah, the kitchen seems to be an okay place. Besides, thereâs food and I can totally escape from physics or whatever with food,â you shot Jay a playful grin, quirking an eyebrow, challenging.Â
âDonât you dare.â Jay said firmly, but not really. You knew he was nothing but a worried brother about your mental health and how your academic performance affected it, wishing to give you only the best.
Unfortunately, the best in his vision wasnât necessarily the best you needed at that moment.Â
Jake finally stood up, fixing his clothes as he did so, running his fingers through his thick hair and glancing at you; your eyes tracked his every movement, the sinking feeling in your stomach tightening with the view. He was so damn hot.Â
âThe kitchen it is, then.â
You nodded, swallowing the lump of nervousness in your throat that came back in a strike, after reminding you would be spending quite a long time alone with Jake, having nowhere to run nor anything to calm down your fluttering heart.
Your legs betrayed you, feeling weak under the pressure of the situation. Still, you forced yourself to move, muttering a quiet âIâll go grab my books,â before rushing off towards your room.
As you came back, hands shaking and mouth dry, you headed straight to the kitchen wishing to have some more time alone to organize your thoughts, gather yourself and regain your senses before calling Jake. Unexpectedly, he was already there, sitting stiffly on the chair he chose while his slender fingers rapidly danced on his phone screen, unaware of your presence.
Your entire body froze, your plan going down the drain right away. You bit your lower lip, a soft, involuntary action that seemed to be the only thing holding you together in that moment. You had to keep moving forward. You had to. But you couldnât. Not when Jake was just⊠there.
A glimpse of a smirk curved the corner of his oh, so plush, distracting lips, glistening under the kitchenâs light while his attention was all on his phone, clearly chatting with someone. Girlfriend? The thought crossed your mind briefly; a man like Jake was probably taken already, and, to be honest, a small part of you almost hoped for it to be true, so you could stop torturing yourself over your silly feelings for him and really move on.
But Jake didnât ease your side, cheeky tongue every so often playing with the corner of his mouth, teeth pressing his plump bottom lip, and from where you stood you could see his pretty eyelashes fluttering with each blink, oblivious to the effect he was causing on you, oblivious to the storm happening inside your chest.
With a loud and sudden laugh his body jolted, phone slipping from his hands and clattering onto the table as he threw his head back, one of his hands messily running through his silk brown strands out of habit.
Only then he noticed you, standing up in the kitchenâs door, hugging your books, clearly staring.Â
âHoly fuck, Y/N!â He blurted out, a hand flying to his chest as if to steady himself, his puppy eyes widened to you, shoulders clearly tensed. âYou scared the shit out of me!â
âIâIâm sorry,â you stuttered, stepping further into the room and trying to sound casual, as if you werenât watching him from the past seconds with your heart almost ripping your ribcage open. âDidnât mean to.â
Jake took a second to regain his composure and his eyes involuntarily lingered on your figure longer than he wanted to, nearly shamelessly tracing the lines of your body; the soft curve of your bare shoulders, how your spaghetti strap top appealed to evidentiate your collarbone and tightened just enough on your chest. Then he paid attention to your pretty fingers clutching the edges of your notebook and books, lowering to the tiny bit of exposed skin of your belly, then your beautiful hips and covered legs.Â
You had chosen a comfortable outfit, not giving a thought about appearance at all â after all, not only the boys had seen you way worse, but the nightâs plans gravitated towards studying and studying only.
Even so, Jake had to hold himself back. There was something about the way your clothes hugged your form that had him silently disorientated, heart faltering some beats and breath hardly passing through his airways, his own body heating just by visualizing you.
He cleared his throat, glancing down to fidget with his phone as a way to ground himself, breaking the tension settled thickly between you two. The small sound brought you out of the daze you got yourself into without realizing it.
âSoâŠâ Jake finally said, his voice a bit unsteady and lower than you expected. âWhere do you want to start?â
His sweet eyes lifted to meet yours again, and his usual easy smile had a hint of something more cautious, more careful, as he focused on your adorable wide-eyed expression. He noticed your cheeks with a faint blush and couldnât hold back a little grin when you diverted your eyes shyly.Â
You slid into the seat across him, sprawling your materials over the table with a quiet sigh, your eyes anxiously avoiding Jakeâs.
âI have no idea.â You admitted, letting out a nervous chuckle, struggling to soothe your nerves. âThe basics?â You added unsurely and Jake was fast to nod tenderly.
Though he was dealing with a lot in his mind, he would always have a soft spot for you.Â
âBasics, yeah. Sounds great.â He agreed with a small smile, carefully reaching out your notebook and opening to scan your notes.Â
A wave of embarrassment flushed over you as you remembered the stupid things you wrote during your classes, fighting your demons trying to understand at least the bare minimum, scribbles that hardly made sense, and that now probably got you looking extra dumb and childish under Jakeâs judgment.
You heard him humming before grabbing one of your books, his fingers brushing yours quietly and quickly as he did so. You ignored the burst of electricity induced by that simple touch, watching how his slender fingers casually flipped the pages until he reached the one he was searching for.
âYou know, I can explain this easily to you,â Jake began to talk, his voice dropping to an unexpected gentle teacher-like tone as he leaned over the table a little, enough to get closer to you, enough to have your stomach twisting and flipping to every direction possible with the warmth his body radiated. âJust donât mind me if I get too technical sometimes.â
âNo problem,â you managed to say, grateful your voice was steady enough for you not to sound stupid or squealed, your eyes glued to your handwriting, tracing the lines of each word as a way of desperately dodging the possibility of meeting Jakeâs gaze.
Even the faintest peek of his furrowed brow when he was focused was enough to make you melt, and he had no idea of how attractive he looked when he was all serious and devoted explaining his nerd things.
âPromise me youâll tell me if you stop following me, alright?â He added, a smile tugging at his lips that you only saw by the corner of your eyes.Â
You nodded quickly, swallowing hard; the scent of his cologne was flooding your senses, drawing you in closer, making it harder to think straight.
âOkay,â you replied, quiet and breathlessly.
For the following few minutes Jake explained the concepts slowly, his voice calm and steady as he walked you through the basics, but your head kept drifting your attention away, deeply engaged with the way his gorgeous fingers traced the lines of your textbook. The following thoughts were too dirty to even continue with.
Jake had that familiar Australian accent that naturally made you weak, and now, combined with the way he had softened his tone, speaking so close to your face, it was enough to drive you completely insane. You couldnât focus on anything but how his warm breath traveled gently, brushing against the sensitive skin of your cheeks, increasing your fluster.
Your heart raced. It raced far too quickly.
The realization of how your body was reacting brought back memories of the times Jake had caused similar sensations in the past, back when he treated you with that older-brother tenderness and you would instantly overreact, shivering at his subtle touches, stuttering whenever his gaze landed on you with his usual captivating smile.
It was undeniable that something had shifted at some point; once there was the slight possibility of getting something more from him, no more holding âJay's little sister'sâ place. You couldnât quite grasp what happened or understand what had triggered such a sudden change, especially since you couldnât recall having done anything wrong.
Your mind kept drifting away from the materials in front of you. Physics was never your thing, and in that very moment no amount of effort could make it so.
Not when Jake was all over you; in your head, by your side, overwhelming your senses.
Every so often his gaze flicked back to you, expecting to see your attentive, engaged expression, and consequently catching the way you chewed on your lower lip or absentmindedly twirled a pen between your fingers with furrowed brows.Â
You had tied your hair in a bun as some strands began to fall over your face, working as a distraction â you were already surrounded with an overwhelming distraction, there was no need for more. That simple act had Jake stuttering, fumbling amidst his words and losing track of his thoughts as the hairstyle gave him the privilege to see your bare, beautiful and kissable neck.Â
His hands tingled, urging to touch you there. Would you like to be choked?
Ok, that definitely wasnât physics.Â
Jake fell silent, swallowing hard as you leaned forward to see the drawing he was just explaining, thinking the delay was intentional. When no words came from his mouth and the air suddenly grew thicker, your eyes followed the trail from his fingers to his veiny hands, from his covered torso to his face, hovering longer on how clenched his sharp jaw was and how his Adamâs apple bobbed nervously.
You shot a questioning look, blinking innocently with brows raised just slightly.Â
Jake wavered under your curious, yet somehow intense gaze, averting it immediately in order to regain his conscious back. Your lips had pursed into a small pout that did nothing to help his way out of his messy head.
Everything he could think about was how bad he wanted to kiss you.
âSomethingâs wrong?â Your velvety voice enveloped the room, a naive question with a supposedly simple answer that got caught in Jakeâs throat.
Jake never saw you as a potential partner or lover, let alone as an object of his desire.Â
You were Jayâs little sister that he cared for as if his own. He saw you grow up, he watched you achieving your goals and got inspired by your strength to overcome the toxic place you had to call a house. Jake cherished your relationship with Jay, grateful for both of you having each other, and that was pretty much you to him.
Even in those times when he treated you to ice cream and snacks during his college breaks, when he visited his parents back home, he kept you in a certain specific spot in his life â something close to family.
He loved to tease you, exactly like a mischievous older brother, laughing when you tripped, when your mouth was stained with chocolate, or when you fumbled through words while talking about your school crush.
Jake had always seen you as a younger sister he needed to look out for.
Until you grew up.
He couldnât pinpoint exactly when the switch happened, when he stopped seeing you as a little girl he had to tease and began noticing you as a ridiculously attractive woman, but seeing you in person after two years definitely played a role in that.
Jake had been your closest company through your first two years of high school, filling the role of an older brother, a place Jay couldnât quite manage to fill because of his own study and work demands, unwillingly.Â
During your last year of high school you stopped seeing Jake, as he had gotten caught up in the same cycle as your brother: studying and working. And you completely understood, knowing that soon enough you would be in a similar place.
Then you graduated and started your own college journey, and Jake, deep into his own responsibilities, went another year without seeing you.
It was at the beginning of your sophomore year in college that you two crossed paths again â at a party when Jay finally agreed to take you with him, after much persistence on your part.
Jake froze.
Jake quite literally forgot how to breathe, forgot how to blink, how to properly work as a human the moment his eyes landed on you, stunning in a short, wine-colored dress, casually holding a drink in your hand.
Jake didnât remember your body looking anything like that, used to seeing you in casual, loose clothing rather than that fitted, short dress that framed your thighs so perfectly, drawing his hungry gaze to stare as a starved man, with a subtle neckline that hinted at the curve of your chest.
Hot.
That was all he could think. Until he realized it was you.
He remembered it vividly: watching you from behind as you danced, immediately struck by how attractive that random woman seemed to be. But as his gaze traveled upward and found your face, he froze, utterly overwhelmed with shock and panic. Especially when you noticed him looking, shooting a cute, surprised smile and a little wave, almost as if you were going to come over.
To say he ran away from there was close to an euphemism, rushing over the bathroom within a lame excuse thrown at his friends before heading back home after using the barâs back door as his way out.
The walk home was painful. Jakeâs head was filled with nasty thoughts that made him completely unable to disable it from happening, swirling around in a dirty carousel.Â
Jake felt like a naughty, filthy pervert. You were Jayâs little sister. The one he played innocently with, hung out countless times without the slightest thought of having you as a true woman; and if the thought ever crossed his mind, he would feel disgusted, because it made no sense and was wrong.
So, the only way to overcome your effect on him was to ignore you at every possible opportunity, not expecting you to care that much about it.
It was a stupid choice, an asshole one even. You used to be friends and now he would rather choose to be eaten by a bear than see you up close and act normal.
Jayâs sudden plan of asking for his help was the start of his downfall for you, and now he was dealing with the consequences of his previous decisions.Â
âJakey?â
The nickname. The fucking nickname you last called him years ago, now sounding even mellow and sweeter, yet as sultry as ever. Jake wondered how would it be to have you underneath him, moaning his name as if your life depended on it with his dick buried deep into your cunt.
âYâYeah?âÂ
Jake immediately damned himself for the stutter, afraid of being too obvious with his nervous reaction. He made the mistake of looking at you, trying to act as normal as possible, and somehow his brain managed to picture your oh, so cute eyes fluttering close as he pleasured you.
His face heated instantly, as if fire was being spread all over his skin. His body was hot as hell, the loosen pants now not so comfortable as before, tightening on his crotch area.
âWhat happened?â
You nonchalantly touched his covered forearm as you asked, concern written all over your face as you struggled to understand what was happening. Jake's abrupt reaction of moving away from your soft hands startled you a little, your head cocking to the side as you frowned, reading Jakeâs widened and panicked eyes.
Unaware of the real deal, oblivious to the torrent of emotions and feelings dancing inside Jakeâs head and chest, you started to feel really annoyed.
Was Jake slipping back into that strange, sudden habit of ignoring you, like he had been since you had started crossing paths again?
There was no plausible explanation for his reaction. The two of you used to go out together all the time, comfortable touches being a natural part of your relationship â especially since Jake was almost ridiculously clingy with his close friends.Â
When the whole âavoiding youâ situation first started you were very confused and questioned what you did wrong. Then you grew mad and eventually got over it since you had no contact at all with Jake throughout the following months, nearly forgetting his existence.Â
But now you had to face it all again, confronting the feelings you once went through; a familiar bitter blend of anger and hurt. It stung like reopening a wound you thought it healed. Exposed, sensitive, vulnerable, bringing back memories you hoped to erase.
âNothing happenââ
âWhy did you stop talking to me?â
Your interruption was as abrupt as Jakeâs reaction to your close presence earlier. He noticed the spark of rage flashing your two orbs suddenly, causing him to blink, caught off guard, eyes widening even bigger if it was possible, trying to understand what you just had hit him with.
âHuh?â
You let out a frustrated huff before repeating yourself even more mad, your hands traveling to your hair fix some random strands as an anxious fidgeting habit to ground you.Â
âYou started to ignore and avoid me. Did I do something wrong? Did I piss you off?â
Jake was taken aback with your outburst of questions, lips parted, words caught somewhere down his throat. There was something close to a knot pressing the back of his tongue that made it hard to speak steadily.
âWhat do you mean?â
âYou know exactly what I mean, Jake.â You sighed, expression softening just slightly, studying his face. âWe used to hang out. We were friends, even.â
Jake exhaled, biting his lip as a way to hold back his words. If he let it all out, he would scare you so fucking bad.Â
âYes, when you were younger.â
âWhat changed?â
You saw how his shoulders tensed, his neck moving as he swallowed hard, demonstrating to feel flustered under your inquisitive gaze. His eyes dropped to his lap, where one of his hands rested comfortably. He dug the depths of his thoughts to keep it as safe and subtle as possible, not wanting to pour it all on you.
âI... I always saw you as a little sister. Thatâs how I looked at you, like family.â
You nodded along, following his soft-spoken speech. You didn't understand what exactly he was aiming for with it so far, so you let him continue, hoping it would bring a closure for your relationship to blossom again.
âBut thenââ He hesitated, eyes flickering up to you and then drifting away. His voice dropped an octave as he added. âI got overwhelmed with my last year in college and eventually with my work. So I didn't have time to see you often. Life just got⊠Busy.â
Deep down he knew you wouldnât buy his lame explanation. However, didnât stop him from holding tightly the small string of hope you would let it pass.Â
At the same time, he had a tingling feeling telling him to blurt out everything he went through when you were the subject. How hard it was to act normal when Jay talked about you, to not get hard seeing your cute instagram pictures, not picture himself getting lost in the middle of your plush thighs.Â
God, you worked him up too easily.
âI get that part, I really do,â you replied, boldly and kind of unconsciously placing your hand on top of Jake's. This time he didnât flinch, taking in your soft, innocent touch. Still, his breath hitched. âBut when I moved here, you started avidly avoiding me,â you continued, voice dropping to something near a whisper as your fingers traced delicate patterns on the back of his hand. âYouâd ignore me at parties, never stopping by to visit. I just didnât understand.â
Jake shifted uncomfortably on his seat, embarrassed of your accurate analysis.
âThe visiting part is Jay's fault. He was the one who suggested for him to go to our house instead of us three coming over here. Just⊠Making things easier, I guess.â
âThat makes sense,â you murmured, pulling your hand away as you realized the weight of the intimacy, afraid of being too weird. âBut the avoiding and ignoring me⊠It doesn't make any.â
Jake closed his eyes briefly, taking a deep sigh. There were no more ways to run away from the topic; his weak excuses had long been overrun by the intensity of your pressing curiosity. You were ready to dig deep and uncover the truth at any cost. Jake knew you well enough to expect this â your persistence, your determination, your stubbornness were traits he had always admired in you and your brother.
âIâm sorry.â
âIf you can explain why youâre sorry, maybe Iâll accept it,â you challenged, arching a brow and immediately grabbing his attention. You knew Jakeâs competitive side and loved to play with it as a coaxing manner to get what you wanted.
You watched his eyes wavering just enough to make you wonder if your tactic would work that time. But then, he chuckled dryly, blinking away from your awaiting expression.
âIâm sorry for acting like that, Y/N.â He started. âIâ I panicked,â his voice was subtle as a feather. If you werenât alone and far from the noise happening in your living room, you doubt you would be able to hear it clearly.Â
âPanicked?â you echoed, confusion knitting your brow, your head tilting just slightly. âOver what?â
Jakeâs face turned a deeper shade of red, especially on his cheeks and on the top of his ears. You got even more puzzled, especially after he answered with just a single word.
âYou.â
You.Â
It hung in the heavy air as thick as a volcanoâs smoke, deepening your confusion, your heart starting to beat faster and your hands getting sweaty.Â
âMe? What do you mean?â
You didn't expect your voice to sound so quiet as you spoke, but you got somehow caught by surprise with how things turned out.Â
So you really did something wrong?
âYou⊠grew up, Y/N. Youâreââ He struggled to find the right words, shifting uncomfortably once more, his eyes traveling between the floor, the table and his lap, never daring to look into your eyes. âIâm sorry, but youâre beautiful. And⊠more than that. Youâre⊠Youâre hot.â
An awkward and tense silence filled the room right after Jakeâs stained voice trailed off at the end of his sentence, as if he wished he could swallow them back together with the knot on his throat.
Now that he had just verbalized the main reason for his behavior towards you, he was feeling extremely disgusting and pathetic. He could feel the weight of his own shame pressing down, and an almost nauseating guilt pushing at him; a reminder he was wrong for allowing you to go out from the safe and special spot as a âlittle sisterâ in his heart, to occupy a darker and more lustful one.
It wasnât your fault, though. Jake would never in his life blame you for a mistake he had authorized to happen. This wasnât just a fleeting, harmless slip; he had seen you, had filthy thoughts before fully realizing it was you. And afterwards he did nothing much to stop those thoughts from creeping back in, the only option being avoiding you instead of facing it as a true man.
He swallowed hard once more â becoming a natural habit at that point â and forced himself to look up for a brief moment. All he saw was your stunned expression, mouth slightly agape and eyes apparently trying to search for some kind of joke, to which it only fueled the growing dread inside him.
Jakeâs mind was a spiral. The fragile line he had been teetering about you began to fall apart as he realized that you would probably cut him off completely, screaming at him the words he deserved to hear.Â
A creepy, weird and disgusting man.Â
His pulse quickened, panic creeping in with every second that you didnât speak, an urge to break the silence immediately, as if maintaining his being in it would drive him completely insane. With that in mind, he opened his mouth to babble.
âIâ I donât expect you to understand. God, I wouldnât even blame you if you decide to never speak to me again. Iâm sureâ Iâm sure we can arrange an excuse to Jay about your study, or even tell the truthâ Iâmââ He cut himself briefly to look away from you, who still had your same expression. His hands were busy gesturing anxiously. âI know I crossed a very dangerous line. Itâs so fucking wrong andâ And Iâve tried to come up with anything to push it away, even ignore it. But then, thereâs you.â
Jakeâs voice faltered, as though his world was colliding, ending, as though he was on the verge of losing his mind somehow.Â
He was.
âThereâs always you, looking like some kind of goddess that makes me go insane.â
The realization of what you just heard made your pulse quicken. Jakeâs babbling worked perfectly to ground you and, ironically enough, to send you back to heaven, as you felt like dreaming after hearing his first sayings.Â
Over the years you thought about having Jake in other ways rather than just a friend or an older brother, but never quite grasping to it completely due to the small, yet existing age gap and the different stages of life drifting you apart.Â
To acknowledge how Jake really felt towards you was similar to living in a vivid fever dream, it got you clenching your thighs, panties pathetically dampening just enough to make you shy, as if he would become aware of your body reacting to his words.
You opened your mouth to respond, to try to find any words that could make sense in between the mess of emotions happening inside you; relief, desire, passion. But before you could even begin, a familiar voice cut through the tension, as sharp as a knife, startling both of you as if you had been caught red-handed.
âHow's study going?â
After Jay broke into your studying session with Jake and consequently interrupted the development of your newfound possibility of relationship with the said guy, you couldnât help but dive into a sea of frustration.Â
Jake immediately panicked and ran away, muttering a lame excuse that he had things to take care of and he would catch up with you later, leaving you sitting there, bewildered, confused and angry â with him and with you brother, who even though had no fault, shattered your chances to voice out your side of the story and maybe, just maybe, get Jake to your bedroom.
Jay didnât flinch a little, aware of how Jake could be impulsive and random with his spontaneous persona and let him go, smiling softly to you after gently stroking your hair and ask if you wanted to relax with him and the remaining guys, thinking you could use some of it after the long minutes you spent studying.Â
You were quick to dismiss the offer, seizing the opportunity to excuse yourself to your room, pretending to be really tired and to need some time alone after reading so much physics hard stuff.
However, as you crashed into your bed and stuffed your head into the soft pillow, your body didnât feel like soothing any time soon, your brain working overtime to remark each and every word uttered by Jake, his low voice as clear as crystal water as it repeated restlessly.Â
Youâre hot. A goddess. Makes me go insane.Â
That night, you met a brand new and nameless sensation. It was close to frustration but layered with the tempting awareness of something you could nearly touch, yet not claim.
Jake ran away, as he always did, without even giving you the proper chance to tell him that, God, you felt the same â perhaps even worse.
His mere act of voicing those genuine, sultry words had already done enough to ruin your self-control â and panties, taking away the opportunity to express just how incredibly irresistible he looked, how you longed to devour every centimeter of his slightly sun-kissed skin, to taste his plush lips, to make him wholly yours.
You asked for Jake's number to Jay the next day, under the pretext of needing to get some extra materials and maybe schedule your following meetings, hoping for it to be reasonable enough. And though Jay willingly accepted and supported your idea, Jake partially ignored you, at most answering your texts with âokâ and âsureâ, never leaving an opening for you to draw him into a longer conversation.
So when Jay served you a stack of pancakes on Monday, you expected everything to happen but what really unfolded.Â
âI scheduled another study session with Jake today. That cool with you?â
The forkful bringing you a piece of your food froze midair, the assimilation of what Jayâs just said made your movements halt shamefully instantly as you raised your eyes only enough to encounter Jayâs relaxed face.
âMhm?â
âJakeâs coming over after work today,â Jay repeated casually, munching his food. âI think he gets off around four, so heâll be here when youâre back from your classes.â
Ok, you definitely â and unfortunately â had heard him right. A spark of excitement and an urge to get yourself dressed extra prettily for college rushed over your body as you straightened your posture on your chair, using of a simple nod to silent agree with the deal.
You feared your words would get stuck on your throat.
âOh, and Iâll be working from home today, so you wonât be alone with him.â
All the efforts were made for you not to choke on your food, but the honey sauce dripping straight down your throat elicited a quiet, small cough from you. You gulped down whatever was on your way to voice out anything, and all you managed was to mutter a confused âHuh?â
Jay smirked at your reaction, but not really reading into it.
âYou know, just in case,â he shrugged nonchalantly and your brow furrowed, stomach twisting with nervousness.
âJust in case of what, exactly?â
You damned yourself for using such a fearful tone, like a frightened kid that had hidden a secret from their parents, leaving gaps for an overinterpretation that Jay could try doing if he was devoted to completely understanding the strange way you were acting.
You deeply wondered if he knew about whatever happened with you and Jake that Friday, or worse, if he eavesdropped on Jake's confession about how he felt about you.
It wasnât like Jay would be fine with Jake coming over if he did in fact know or heard the conversation. And knowing your brother, he would rather have a civilized and polite conversation with you instead of playing around.Â
âI donât know, Y/N,â Jay started, a glint of mischief twinkling in his eyes. âYou hate physics and I called Jake to come teach physics to you. The other day, you were kneading that pizza dough like it owed you money. Donât know what youâd do to someone whoâs a walking physics encyclopedia.â
Your pulse quickened, but your shoulders loosened. Gladly, Jay had already moved on the subject, unbothered, yapping about how he preferred doing his job from home and how annoying it was to deal with paperwork in person. All you could do was to nod along, anxiously counting the minutes.
With almost absolute certainty, none of your classes that day could hold your attention. And so it was. The professors' words seemed like random sound waves, failing to form coherent sentences for you, and you had to fight the constant urge to get up from your chair and leave, even though you knew Jake wouldn't be there yet.
Mondays were exhausting. You had to attend multiple classes, and especially that day there were practical lectures that kept you stuck on campus later than usual. By the end of the day, despite the exhaustion, you were still buzzing with anticipation.
You practically ran back to the apartment you shared with your brother, trying not to make too much effort and break a sweat â after all, you wouldn't have time for a shower or to get dressed properly before seeing Jake.
You felt like a teenager nervously preparing to meet her crush in the hallways between classes; your hands were trembling, your whole body thrilling with excitement, as if each part of you was electrified with anticipation.
Your heart pounded relentlessly, as if each beat echoed louder than the last, straight into your eardrums. The closer you got to your shared apartment, the harder it became to calm your racing thoughts, and the overwhelming mix of excitement and nervousness almost made you dizzy when you grabbed the door knob and twisted it open.Â
Jake was sprawled on your couch, golden specs casually resting on his face and his brown, silky hair poking to different places since he was playing with it nonchalantly while the other hand held his phone. His eyes raised up from the screen when he heard the sound of the door opening, and with a subtle smile he greeted you.
âHi, Y/N.âÂ
Your gaze instinctively hovered across the room, searching for Jayâs presence. At the same time, you fought against the urge to make yourself comfortable with Jake on your couch. He looked so inviting, cozy and fluffy laying in there, his demeanor soft and relaxed, nearly pulling you close, drifting your thoughts away from reality.
It took seconds for it to hit harshly, as you remembered the intimacy that had once been so natural between the two of you no longer existed, and the possibility of reclaiming that closeness felt slightly out of reach. It was a bitter thought, one that reminded you how fragile things had become.
However, for Jakeâs misfortune you werenât one to give up so easily, now aware of his feelings and thoughts towards you, there was no way to back down so quickly. Not knowing he nourished a desire strong enough to make him opt to avoid you in order to get over it.Â
âHeâs in his office room,â Jake explained when noticed what you were doing, kindly breaking you out of your trance.
âOh,â you mumbled, nodding awkwardly. Jake sat straight on the couch, eyes boldly locking into yours as he did so.
You licked your lips out of habit, a bit taken aback with the idea of being in a room alone with him again, the anxiety you had built up throughout the day exploding in your chest just like fireworks.
The slightest motion of your tongue dragging along your plump, cherry colored lips didnât go unnoticed by Jakeâs nervous gaze. His eyes flickered downwards right after, and you silently cheered when he took his time to appreciate your bare thighs in full display for him.Â
You had chosen an outfit that was simple yet comfortable, but also bold, different from what you had planned for the day before knowing you would spend time with Jake; a relatively oversized sweater that would protect you from the gentle breeze of the day, paired with a short skirt that highlighted your rounded thighs â thighs you knew Jake would enjoy seeing.
And he so fucking did. The way he parted his lips, swallowed nothing, and shifted uncomfortably on his seat confirmed your theory.Â
Jakeâs cheeks warmed when he realized what he just did, checking you out carelessly and right in front of your beautiful eyes. He cleared his throat, ready to throw some random small talk to guide the situation to the real deal â the whole studying thing â, but you had other plans.Â
âIâm not mad.âÂ
After years sharing moments with Jake, having him practically living in your house similar to a family member, you had gathered enough sources to know Jake was torturing himself with a guilt you didnât see to be necessary, not when you desired him as much as he wanted you, not when things could be as simple as one plus one.Â
Jake was smart enough to catch onto what you were referring to, still, he hesitated, quirking an eyebrow in disbelief. He remained silent, waiting for your following words when you opened your mouth and closed, as though struggling to find the best, right ones.Â
Your feet moved towards his direction and you took the seat beside him, keeping a safe distance. A distance that would keep yourself under control not to jump on his lap, tug his hair with your hands while kissing him passionately, using your hips to rut onto his bulge, aiming to hear his lascivious noises.
Swallowing your impulsive thoughts back, deep on your throat, you continued.Â
ïżœïżœIâm not mad that youâŠâ Holding back a shy smile, you bit your lip. âIâm not mad that you think Iâm hot.â
Your voice came out as quiet as possible. The fleeting sensation of being heard by your brother weighed heavy on the air, pushing you to keep it as hushed as you could.Â
Once more, Jake shifted on his seat, his own fluster increasing after hearing you voicing out his last confession. He didnât feel stupid, though. It was impossible to feel anything other than thrilled.
He couldnât pinpoint precisely what turn that conversation with you would be taking; the small hint of fear creeped his chest, but the excitement of positively reading the situation was deliciously overgrowing it.Â
âBut we have to talkâŠâ You tried to sound firm, yet gentle, not wanting to scare him away. The way your eyes rested on his face made Jakeâs heart skip a beat. You were so fucking beautiful. âYou know, I didnât tell you about my part in this story.â
Jake felt his body untensing with your relaxed, tempting even, words; the atmosphere heavy but not with anything bad. It felt suffocating in the bestest way possible, as if a hundred of amazing possibilities could unfold, each of them having your lips pressing against his as a starter and his dick buried deep in you as a finisher.
âDo we?â Jake tilted his head to the side, eyes gleaming with teasing after the realization. The same behavior he would have with you was brought back in a snap, nonetheless, you doubted your strength to deal with it, especially when his two brown orbs showed a hint of something darker. Â
âYes.â
A quiet, feather-like whisper. It was all you managed to say, failing to keep up with your steady, collected image.
âOkay, we can talk,â he nodded softly, and though his eyes showed affection, the faint smirk adorning the corner of his lips triggered your inner core to pleasantly twist.
Jake leaned closer, now relaxed before your presence; your compliant demeanor easing his way through it, taunting his bolder side to shine brighter. Your breath hitched when his eyes wandered your face carefully, his body nearly pressing yours as he drank in your perfect features before gently grabbing your chin to pull you closer.
He was centimeters away from touching you where you needed him the most â firstly. Because your entire being craved for him.Â
âBut unfortunately, I have to teach you physics before, pretty.â
That was how you ended up sitting at your desk after announcing your arrival to your brother, saying you would be with Jake in your bedroom for studies purposes.
Bullshit.
Jake brought an extra chair to sit by your side, and you truly made double effort to keep your focus on whatever he was explaining, but his words sounded slurred, vague, like a baby talk. His voice and accent were unnecessarily attractive, inducing your head to concentrate on its sounds instead of the meaning. Not to mention his fucking kissable lips, so, so, so close, yet so far.Â
Each time your eyes darted to the side, you caught a glimpse of his side profile. Distracting, beautiful, captivating.
Jake had a nose you swore it was sculpted by the finest, most talented artist; sharp and smooth just right, softly curved at the tip, gorgeously displayed on his handsome face. That high bridge triggered your most profound and dirty thoughts, your eyes dropping to a darker shade almost instantly as you got drunk on his features.Â
Jakeâs whole being was attractive, tempting, a living demon who now taunted your worst behavior and you loved every bit of it. Alongside that, the unveiling situation between the two of you was eating you alive, slowly consuming your mind.
After the little study session you agreed on talking about the dangerously unspoken matter, with the hope of resolving things. On your bed, if you were lucky.
You wanted to have Jakeâs hands exploring your body, gripping and pulling you closer, pressing you against the mattress while fucking you from behind, hard, deep, fast, whatever he decided to. You needed his lips marking your neck, his face stuffed between your legs, his mouth working on your pussy while you screamed his name.Â
You could almost feel how his tongue would work perfectly in your clit, licking, sucking andâ
âAnd thatâs how thermodynamics works. Itâs amazing, isnât it?âÂ
You blinked confused towards Jake, feeling just a little bad for not really enjoying your private lessons as much as he was. It was cute to see how talkative he became whenever physics was the topic, and extremely hot to witness his smart brain working in full motion to explain every word to you.
Nonetheless your attention span was long gone, ever since his scent started to intoxicate your senses, making you wish to have it all over your skin with his body hovering yours.Â
âBut of course youâd be paying more attention to my lips and my nose.â
You widened your eyes, speechless. Jake clicked his tongue, shaking his head in a faux discontentment. You trembled on your seat, unconsciously moving back from the closeness of your bodies; there was a fear creeping in your head of losing your inner battle to the raw passion tingling your skin.
âListen, Y/N. Iâm really trying here. Iâd appreciate it if you did some effort too.âÂ
Jake was once again teetering the same risky line, this time with less hesitation, his confidence bubbling as he realized you wouldn't be pushing him away.
The moment he caught your hungry your devouring him throughout the entire tutoring, how willingly to let him in you seemed to be, devoted to the idea of fucking under your brotherâs roof, he threw his self control away and started to think with his other head.Â
You gulped, eyes lowering to your notebook peacefully resting on your desk.Â
âIâm sorry, Jake.â
âYâknow what?â Jake suddenly stood up, offering his hand with his gorgeous slender fingers full of silver rings for you to grab. âComâere.âÂ
Your squinted eyes flickered between his digits and his face, searching for some proper explanation that unfortunately you didn't receive. So you followed his steps, standing up as well and shivering with the touch of his mildly cold skin against yours.
With the way Jake grinned, your stomach tightened, fearing whatever he had on his mind. Trying not to be so obvious with your embarrassing reactions, you frowned.
âWhat are we doiââ
âThe first law in thermodynamics is that energy canât be destroyed or created, it can only change forms.â
He said his speech within his teacher-like tone once more, interrupting you without caring to explain why standing up and explaining it to you again would make the material magically settle inside your brain.
Especially when you wanted to settle on your bed with him on top of you.
âWhat the fââ
âSo, if I do this,â Jake raised a hand, gently placing it on your right cheek. You winced and retracted a bit with the unexpected soft brush of his slightly cold skin on your, now, heated face. âDo you feel it?â He whispered, fingertips tracing the warm flesh underneath his touch, his body instinctively getting closer to yours as his eyelids softened. âThe heat of your skin will work its way to make mine less cold, yâknow? Mine is absorbing from yours, to stabilize our temperatures together. The energy isnât being destroyed nor created, itâs transferred from one body to another until they find the perfect equilibrium.â
It was pathetic the way you nodded along, Jakeâs words and presence reverberating throughout your body similar to a wave of pure pleasure, your eyes sparkling with a mix of curiosity and shock with this new method.Â
So, physics can be interesting, huh?
âNow,â Jake got closer, his voice dropping an octave while the hand that held yours found comfort on your waist, eliciting an immediate gasp from you. âQuestion: what happens when two equally heated bodies touch each other?âÂ
Jakeâs face was just a few centimeters away from yours, his lips ghosting, tempting a kiss you wished to happen as soon as possible; he seemed to be testing the waters, glad that you allowed him to do so.
The way his warm breath tickled your skin was dizzying, yet addictive. You shivered, respiration quickening with the way Jakeâs eyes dropped, almost closing, as he got charmed by your soft, plump and oh, so kissable lips.
There was no adequate explanation to how your body reflexively reacted to his stimulus, your hands traveling slowly to grip onto something as a way to ground yourself, finding the thin fabric of Jakeâs shirt on your way through it.Â
âNothingââ You gulped when you started talking, because the simple motion had your lips grazing Jakeâs. He nodded reassuringly, as a way to incite you to keep speaking, the grip on his shirt tightening. âNothing changes.â
Your eyes lazily fluttered close and open, the tension nearly palpable in the air. Out of habit, you wetted your lips with your tongue; a habit that now got you brushing it against Jakeâs lips as well. His breath hitched, surprised, but he didnât stutter.Â
âYeah,â Jake muttered, letting his hand thread through your strands, tugging it gently. You moaned softly, lips parted, a small frown gracing your features.Â
Jake drunkenly groaned, throwing caution and patience aside with your reaction. Fuck, his self control was down to hell and for seconds he forgot where he was, because you were everything and everywhere in his head.Â
He could feel how tight his pants became as his dick twitched for some attention, hard and heavy.
âYouâre a quick learner when thereâs practice involved, arenât you?â
Jakeâs lips were now grazing featherly on the sensitive flesh of your neck, teasing to kiss but never truly giving in.
You didnât even notice how much you were leaning into his touch, as within every tempting brush on your skin you melted deeper, growing impatient each passing second.
Your fingers boldly slipped underneath his shirt, tracing the subtle lines of the abs you dreamed of licking and kissing and sucking and⊠God, you were on the verge of crying out of desperation. Your fingernails dug harder into his skin, eliciting a jolt from Jake that immediately pressed you against himself in response.
âPlease, Jakeyââ You whimpered when you felt his hardened bulge poking you, together with â finally â his wet kisses on your neck, nibbling gently the area with an aching slow.
Jake chuckled in contact with your sensitive skin, loving the way you tilted your head to give him more access, loving the way you were needily pressing yourself on his body, loving the way your hands involved his waist firmly; goosebumps flushed over as he delighted in your sweet and lascivious noises and responses.Â
A phantom of a smirk tugged the corner of Jakeâs glistening lips as he trailed soft little pecks through your jawline and near to your mouth, laughing gently with the way you searched instantly for more with hooded eyes.
âWanâ me to kiss you, pretty?â Jake asked, voice thick with raw desire. He now held you with both hands on your hips, one shamelessly lowering to your ass every so often, while yours glided over his chest until they reached his firm shoulders.
You watched Jakeâs eyes flash with a mischievous spark and you promptly knew that you could play that game too. So instead of answering right away, you feigned the purest expression you could, batting your eyelashes deliberately as you looked up to him, big doe eyes twinkling with a playful innocence.Â
Jake wavered under your gaze, breath twitching, clearly weak to your tactics already. You held back your smile, keeping your faux naivety; the single action fueling Jakeâs craving deeper.
âOnly if you want it too, Jakey.â
You had no right to sound so pure, as if you were immaculate, untouched, never once ruined, yet dripping with lust and desire. So fucking filthy.Â
âFuck, doll.â Jake muttered faintly, not holding back anymore, his jaw clenching as he harshly dragged you over the room, far from gently as he pushed you to bounce on the soft mattress of your bed. âIâll kiss you,â he said, hovering on top of your body, the excitement bubbling pleasantly in your low area. âAnd then Iâll fuck you so, so fucking hard.â
You giggled, getting comfortable on your bed as Jake positioned himself between your legs, which hugged him naturally. As he lowered his face to do as he said, you smirked.Â
âIs that a promise?â
Jakeâs eyes darkened, pupils wide showing you a sea of unknown feelings you never thought you would witness with him. His lips curved into a slow, teasing smile, one hand trailing deliberately the curve of your hip, your waist, chest, until it was gently wrapped around your neck.Â
âBet.âÂ
Driven by a mutual need, Jake dived into you passionately, almost desperate. You let out an instantaneous satisfied moan with the feeling of his soft lips pressing harshly on yours, one hand flying to take place on his silky, thick strands, the other gripping his wrist, keeping his hand in place on your throat.Â
It took seconds to have Jakeâs wet tongue infiltrating the electric touch and unapologetically searching for yours while his body grinded just slightly against your clothed cunt, making it pulse in desperation, dampening the fabric of your panties.
You tried to remember if you had locked the door beforehand, the faintest peak of your moral appearing just to be completely vanished, forgotten due to the vibrations of Jakeâs small noises; his groans sent signals straight to your throbbing core, each clutch of your fingers tangled on his locks igniting a new sound that you discovered to be your favorite.Â
Jake tightened his fingers around your throat faintly, starting a path of sloppy kisses down to your neck and shoulders, his hot tongue savoring each piece of your exposed smooth skin, and everything you could do was to squirm underneath him, struggling to maintain your sounds low.
With your movement, you accidentally brushed your knee on Jakeâs crotch area the exact same moment he released your throat, causing him to open-mouth moan and frown, lips now working on your covered breasts, busying his free hand to squeeze your hips; just the fleeting contact of his heavy, still clothed, dick against your body fueled your craving deeper, your hands gripping on his strands harder.
âJake, can you please hurry up?â You said in between a moan when he nibbled your nipple over your shirt. âWeâ We canât be caught.â
Jake looked up at you, beholding the view of your beautiful fucked out expression with just a few minutes of making out while his hands explored your body. He would bet millions that underneath your underwear, you had already made a mess â the thought alone enough to make him gulp, thrilled to feel your spongy drippy walls enveloping his throbbing length.Â
âNewtonâs third law,â Jake mumbled suddenly against your stomach, eyes glazed in yours that now showed a confused state, eyes sparkling with pure desire. He curled his fingers on the waistband of your sweatpants, lowering it enough to give him access to your laced underwear. âFor every action, thereâs a reaction.âÂ
His explanation didnât do much for you to understand right away, your frown deepening asking why he would say that so out of the blue. But as soon as he pressed his fingers over your panties and started to draw circles on your clit, you kind of got it.Â
âShit,â you whispered within a whimper, rolling your hips forward as a way to get more of what Jake was offering you, making his lips curl with a satisfied grin. âI swear to GâGodâŠâ
The slowness of his movements got you sighing in frustration. It was clear he was playing with you â quite literally â, and the possibility of Jay hearing you two or even worse, bursting the door open and caughting you mid-act was as frightening as arousing.
Having to be quiet, to keep it down, to not raise suspicions. You clenched around nothing. Jake nearly felt it.
His tongue was constantly wetting his lips, mouth watering, his breath heavy, eager, like a starved man who had his favorite meal on full display but couldnât do anything other than⊠watch.
You angrily propped yourself on your elbows, tugging Jakeâs hair to pull him back to be face-to-face with you, his fingertips never stopping the circles on your cunt. Your lips were centimeters away from each other, eyes hooded, deepened in lust. Jake saw a remnant of your playful aura getting lost amidst the lewd words that came out of your mouth.
âYou canât keep up with your promises, I see,â you murmured, your voice low, sultry, laced with challenge; the smirk dancing on your lips heightened the defianceâs level, triggering Jakeâs pulse to quicken. His breath caught as he arched an eyebrow âShould I ask you to leave so I can finish this myself?â You teased, pulling his head to the side by tightening your grip on his locks. âAre you all talk, Jaeyun?â
Jake froze for a brief moment, his mind working hard to connect your words, and the moment it did, his features hardened, utterly lured by your bait; jaw clenched, eyes darker, breath ragged. It dropped to a deeper shade of craving, raw and delightful.
Your core buzzed with anticipation and you unconsciously let out a gasp when Jake pulled you to lay back down on the soft mattress by the waist, hands immediately removing the last piece of cloth that covered your lower body, quickly to undress himself from his own shirt and jeans, exposing his torso and his hardened cock pressing against his underwear.
Absurdly hot.Â
Jake was absurdly hot.Â
A single silver necklace graced his beautiful neck in contrast with his subtly tanned skin, his chest, toned enough to drive you insane, rose and fell faintly. The way his perfect v-line drew your attention towards his underwear seemed almost purposeful, the stained portion on the thin fabric around his tip got your mouth watering. One thing you were sure of: Jake was big.
He smirked with the way you devoured him whole with your filthy gaze, feeling as much wanted as he desired you too. He playfully dropped his eyes down to his own cock just to glance at you before getting completely naked, catching just enough of your reaction over his bare body.
You had little to no time to appreciate the view as Jake hovered over you quickly, propping himself in between your spreaded legs. Your eyes gleamed with longing and your mouth fell agape when Jake started to glide his dick on your wet folds. He couldnât hold back a groan with the feeling too, eager to get your pussy hugging his shaft.
âCondom?â He asked, lips kissing the corner of your mouth while waiting for your answer about where to find the said protection. Your immediate reply got him throbbing.
âNo.â
Jake fully halted his hips, looking you dead in the eye, and when he saw nothing other than certain, he groaned. âFuck, pretty. You canât say thââ
âRaw, Jaeyun.â You repeated yourself, fingernails digging deep on his biceps, a moan escaping from your lips when his heavy cock brushed your clit.
âDamn,â he mumbled against your neck, aligning his length within your pulsing, drippy hole, aching to be fulfilled.
As Jakeâs tip pressed against you, a messy kiss took place of your mouths in order to muffle your noises, sloppy and hot, tongues everywhere, teeth pressing each otherâs bottom lip harshly, caring little to nothing about hurting.
You whimpered with the feeling of him filling you so good, going deeper and deeper each passing second. When he finally buried himself completely, a groan got lost in between your kisses, and he kept still while you adjusted, though it was extremely hard to wait when you tightened your walls so perfectly around him.Â
âYouâ You feel so good,â he muttered against your lips, voice weak, losing himself in the feeling with his face contorting in pure pleasure as he licked and sucked your bottom lip, asking for more kisses.
The wording and how he said it got you clenching more and Jake felt it right away, your eyes fluttering close as he didnât hold back and started thrusting on you slowly. He was so deep and intense on you, yet deliberate, a pacing you would curse if you werenât enjoying that much.Â
A soft knock on your bedroom door interrupted the blissful moment, panic instantly taking over your faces as you widened your eyes and gasped, instinctively covering your mouth with your hand.Â
âShit,â you whispered, looking at the closed door over Jakeâs shoulder, your heart beating loud inside your chest.
You never prayed so hard for a door to be locked.
âY/N?â Jay calmy called out from the other side.
âAnswer him.â Jake whispered demandingly against your cheek, enjoying it a bit too much for your liking, especially because if you two got caught, it wasnât just you who would get screwed.Â
His eyes scanned your expression, how heavy was your breathing, how bright with fear your eyes shone, although there was a thick layer of pleasure not hiding your enjoyment of the situation.Â
âYeah?â You tried your hardest to sound steady and not stained, but it became a difficult mission when Jake was pushing himself even deeper within each deliberate roll, clearly searching to hit your sensitive spot.Â
âAre you alright? Did Jake leave already?â
Your eyes darted over to Jake, who was keeping the grind slow, painfully slow. You arched an eyebrow, not saying a word as you waited for the man on top of you to decide if he was going to lie to his best friend or not.
Jake smirked.
âNo, Iâm still here,â he kind of shouted, biting his bottom lip to contain a whimper when you tugged his hair at the same time you squeezed him with your walls. After realizing his weakness of having his locks being pulled, you started to use it as an advantage. âAnd sheâs fine, weâreââ he interrupted himself because of the quiet moan that escaped your parted lips, forehead resting on yours, the fear of being heard creeping stronger, fueling, feeding his arousal to the extreme. âWeâre wrapping things up.â
Jake managed to let it out in one go, luckily and supposedly believable enough for Jay not to try open the door or ask any of you to do it.Â
âOh, um, okay⊠I just finished my work,â Jay said casually. âIâll be in my room if you need me.â
Oh, great. Jayâs room. The one next door.Â
âAlright, bro,â Jake was the only one able to speak, especially because you had now your teeth pressing on his shoulders as a way to keep yourself quiet. âSee you in a few, then.â
You two not-so-patiently waited for the sound of Jayâs footsteps to fade far enough down the hall before continuing, Jakeâs eyes filled with teasing when he looked back at you and immediately started to faster his thrusts, taking in from your instant response of curving your back with lips parted, the slightest moan escaping from them.
âShh, baby girl. Donât make any noises, yeah?â Jake whispered in your ear, his hot breath fanning your skin. With the way his fingertips traced softly your thighs, only to harshly grip into your flesh and pound deeper, you couldnât hold back your whimper, wincing. âShhâŠâ He shushed again, an obvious smirk adorning his plump lips that now rested on swollen ones, his low voice causing your whole body to feel like on fire, skin tingling in despair.
You wanted to scream his name so bad.
âJâJakeâŠâ You moaned underbreath, struggling to keep it quiet. Jake chuckled, amused by your reckless behavior.
âDo you want your brother to hear us, sweetheart?â He asked, filthy, feigning a mocking tone. âI donât think heâd like to know how deep into you Iâm in right now.â
With that, he thrusted once more, hitting your sweet spot right away. You nearly cried as you threw your head back, walls clenching around his dick furiously, fingernails sinking into his flesh, back arching.
Jake grinned, in complete awe with your surrendered, fucked up form, wishing so bad to be able to get more of you â your screams, your whimpers, you chanting his name, anything. He just knew you would sound even hotter.Â
âSuch a dirty little girl. Dying for someone to hear us, huh?âÂ
âNâNoâŠâ You whined, pathetically shaking your head and softly smacking his shoulder as you got lost in yourself. You felt your body starting to convulse as Jake kept on hitting your g-spot over and over, barely noticing he had his forehead resting on yours again, his hard breathing blowing harshly on your face. âCanâtâ So bigââ
You rolled your eyes with the speed of Jakeâs hips increasing. He wanted to go harder and faster, but the slapping sounds were already growing too loud, teetering the edge of getting caught a bit too much. Not to mention the blend of quiet moans, whimpers and groans you both exchanged in between pants and messy kisses.
Within minutes Jake felt the coil on his stomach tightening, his release was near and by the way you started to sound desperate, you were close too.
âIâm not gonâ last much longer, pretty,â Jake hissed when you wrapped your legs around his hips and pushed him deeper, helping him to maintain the rhythm of his thrusts. âFuck...â
You fluttered your eyes open â didnât even remember when you had closed it â right on time to catch a glimpse of Jakeâs necklace dangling close to your face as he propped himself up to ease his pushes, his sweaty hair part sticking to his forehead, part hanging down, grazing softly on your nose.Â
The overwhelming feeling of Jakeâs burying himself deep into you, filling up each centimeter inside your cunt, his scent all over your senses, his sweet and hot silent moans, the way he had a pleasant frown gracing his features, every now and then biting his lip.
You felt your orgasm building up in a delightful, electrifying wave that flushed your trembling body.
âI wannaââ
âCome to me, baby,â Jake urged you, his own climax teetering the edge, voice cracking. âWanâ feel you creaming my cock.â
A mild louder noise escaped your lips as you shivered, legs shaking with the amount of pressure your body was releasing. Jake bursted right after your juices coated his length, stuffing you up with his warm seed.
Your heavy breaths filled the room for a while. Jakeâs tired body pressing against yours within an intimacy that made your heart flutter, realization hitting that you just had fucked your crush, who just happened to be your brotherâs best friend.
You closed your eyes, a sting of a bittersweet feeling growing inside your chest.Â
âWe still need to talk.â
The talk never really happened, since the constant visits unfolded your relationship with Jake better than you expected.
It seemed to be a no strings attached type of relationship, with you and Jake kissing and fucking anytime you had the chance to in between your tutoring classes.
You couldnât help but feel guilty, and foolish to some extent, because tasting Jake's body and mouth awakened the same feelings of love you once buried deep within you, feelings that you now had to bury again, fully aware that they werenât nearly reciprocated.
Jake probably saw you as woman he could fuck, and you thought you could live with that.
Your encounters with Jake became as usual as your classes, and gratefully Jay obliviousness blinded him from the real thing happening under his roof, because in no world you would need everyday physics lessons, even with your tough relationship with it.Â
At some point you started to believe that your tactics to restrain yourself around Jake had been perfected.
When Jake changed his behavior with you, avoiding you at parties and the other events where you both accidentally crossed paths, Jay never suspected a thing. First, because he knew how busy Jake was with his work, and second, because he believed friendships were flexible and often riddled with uncontrollable nuances â meaning, you and Jake were simply going through a phase where things werenât aligning.
It became routine to pretend you were still in the same cycle, with Jake acting as a casual friend who was just helping you with your studies enough to pass the course.
Jay had no idea you had promised Jake that you would only let him eat you out if you aced your exams â although you would let him do it anyway.
It was just so fun to watch him throw tantrums at you, whining how much he needed to feel your cunt pulsing and dripping on his tongue. You couldnât deny the excitement of receiving a head from Jake was big; the way he kissed you and how high bridged his nose was, were enough proof that he would do a hell of a job.
As the semester was reaching its end, your anxiety grew.
You felt secure in most of your subjects, because even though Jake was actively present in your life, you managed to find out time to focus on your individual studies and felt confident enough in them.
But then there was physics.
The one you were supposedly studying, locked in the room with Jake. The one you learned while feeling the heat of his body against yours, his soft whispers, groans in your ear as his hands explored every centimeter of your skin.
It was undeniable that Jake's practical method worked wonders, and that was exactly why you took the lead and suggested that for that day's study session.
âYou wanna do what?â
You and Jake were sitting across each other in your room: Jake on your bed and you at your desk chair. He had just arrived for your tutoring of the day and you immediately greeted him with a suggestion that had him with the most dumbfounded, in disbelief, shocked kind of expression written all over his face.
âSuck you off while you explain the basics of that shit,â you repeated yourself casually, like it was the most natural thing in the world.
âQuantum.â Jake pointed, his eyebrows skyhigh at that point.Â
âYeah,â you nodded, smiling innocently while playing with a pen and wiggling your legs off the chair.
âYou want me to teach you the basics of quantum physics while you suck me off?â He echoed, still trying to completely comprehend your proposal.Â
âThatâs exactly what I just said.â
It was an undeniable proposal, right?
Jake blinked, his brain falling into a dangerous short-circuit. To imagine you, kneeled in front of him, his dick buried deep in your throat, free-fucking would be his wettest dream come true.
However, there was a big chance of him losing control of his sounds â and himself â the very moment your pretty lips wrapped around his dick, tongue playing with his sensitive length as your gorgeous doe eyes looked up to him.
Jake damned himself for getting hard just by the thought of it.
âAnd how does that help you⊠Practically talking?â
He was really trying to logical think and follow your thought process, shifting on his seat while his mind traveled away.
The whole fucking while studying was a thing not only because you both wanted it to happen, but mostly because Jake could partially dodge the creeping guilt, knowing his work was getting done, even if that meant him shoving his dick inside you while doing so â a win-win situation with his peculiar, yet effective technic.Â
With that particular request, he couldnât quite pinpoint where the logic leaned, triggering his mind to wonder if you were getting dangerously close to crossing the unspoken line that came with your agreement.
Jakeâs eyes tracked as you stood up and walked close to him, casually sitting on his lap, arms naturally wrapping around his shoulders.
âWellâŠâ You trailed off, fingers slowly and shamelessly drawing a soft line across his chest, feeling his breath hitching beneath your touch; your eyes dropping to a darker shade of lust, shifting the whole atmosphere. âHearing your moaning voice would⊠Yâknow, help me internalize it,â you smirked, letting each word teasingly hang in the thick air.
Jakeâs eyes narrowed with a spark of intrigue, head tilting slightly as he searched for a hint of humor or mischief in your gaze that would give away your plan. But you held his stare, unwavering, eyes burning with a confidence that left no room for doubt, no suggestion of play.
âSoâŠâ He murmured within a gulp, his Adamâs apple bobbing drawing your attention briefly. âYouâd remember the explanation⊠Because IâmâŠâ
âMoaning it.â
The wording left your lips light as a feather, yet as sultry as the taste of the finest wine â tempting, subtle, delicious. Jake leaned in, failing to ignore your bait, his jaw clenching as his grip on your waist tightened; a quiet curse escaped him, underbreath, the moment you busied your lips on his sensitive neck.Â
âFuckâŠâ
You rolled your hips just slightly, teasing a touch you wouldnât be giving to him. Not so easily.
âWhat do you say, mhm?â You kissed Jakeâs jawline, his chin, the tip of his nose and then his plush lips.Â
There was something about the way he kissed you back, deliberate and tender, as if you were everything he waited for his whole life.
After days of sharing intimacy, you began to notice that sometimes Jake kissed you like a lover that long dreamed of you â mouthful and yearning, as if he couldnât get enough of you. Like a soft breeze fanning your skin on a warm summer afternoon â comfortable enough to make you sigh, yet stirring something deep. Like the glow of the sun fading beneath the horizon at dusk â beautiful, fleeting, and full of possibilities. Like a first lover â fear of losing the sight of you and unforgettable.Â
Jake kissed you like he was slowly allowing himself to fall in love with you. And you didnât know yet, but he was.
Each attach of lips elicited new waves of euphoria through your veins as your feelings emerged without a proper warning, kicking the front door of your heart open and making a delightful mess.
You couldnât help the strong pump of your heart and the flutter on your stomach the moment Jake crossed your sight. How thrilled you got when scheduling your meets, not caring about the studying neither the fucking; eager to kiss, to hug, just to have Jake close.
In that very moment you wished, more than ever, for him to feel the same way. You could sense the desire in his every touch, in the way his body pressed flush to yours, demonstrating how much he needed you, how much he was losing himself in you, like magnets.
You could feel it in the way his hands roamed, the warmth of his touch, the intensity in his gaze. It was tangible, undeniable. Jake wanted you. But was it enough? Did Jake want more than just a moment, or was it just an ephemeral passion, burning brightly before fading into memory like ashes?
On the other hand, Jakeâs mind slipped into a haze, zoning out while drowning deeper in the warm and cozy ocean that was you.
He found himself lost in the memory of your first kiss â fueled by a mixture of fear and excitement. Not the fear of being caught, but the terror of realizing he had already fallen too intensely, his entire being consumed by the intoxicating pull of you. And he did nothing, nothing to fight back or to swim back to the top, utterly, willingly under your spell.
You had him wrapped around your fingers from the moment you first crossed paths at that party.Â
Jake had tried to keep his safe distance, as a way of respecting your brotherâs implicit boundaries and you, the little girl he grew up with. But mainly because he was completely aware that once he succumbed to the temptation of you, there would be no turning back.
When you both embarked on this brand new journey of friends with benefits, Jake knew that he could end up losing himself more than he should.
He believed you deserved to be treated like a queen â to be adored and desired as the most precious thing in the world. And he could be that person if you allowed him to.
But it was as clear as crystal water that you didnât see him in that way. Not when you withdrew from acts of intimacy, not when you pulled back as the kiss grew too passionate, too full of love, not when you showed that you werenât ready to take another step forward together.
Jake didnât mind being used for your pleasure, not at all. It was a mutually beneficial arrangement: you got your physics lessons and some good orgasms, and he got to have you for a brief moment, just long enough to satisfy the hunger he felt. Then he would return, craving more, locked in a cycle he knew all too well, hoping his excuses of giving extra hours of teaching would be enough to keep you by his side just a little bit more.
That first taste had done more than ignite a flame; it had marked him, like a brand, leaving him completely, irrevocably at your mercy. Jake was yours. You just didnât know yet.
That one kiss lingered painful longer than any other. When you finally pulled away, your breath came in short bursts and you were unsure whether it was the intensity of his touch or how quickly your heartbeats increased in such a short span of time.
Jake wore a lovestruck expression that had your body responding immediately â heat spreading through your chest, leaning forward, wanting more of whatever he had to offer.
âYou pull me like magnets, you know that?â Jake casually and suddenly dropped in, voice barely above a whisper but thick with something unfamiliar to you so far, something that got your stomach fluttering with an emotion you didnât want to name yet, scared of being real.
You swallowed down your immediate reaction, trying to regulate your breath while being torn between letting your heart follow along or keeping your feet on the ground, afraid of reading too much into that unusual moment that was just starting to unfold before you.
âThatâs not todayâs subject,â you managed to mutter back, a tinge of anguish holding onto your voice as your eyes traced Jakeâs handsome features.Â
You could lose yourself in him for hours and never grow tired. He had the most perfect face, soft puppy brown eyes filled with sincerity, prominent cheekbones that constantly shone brighter when he was smiling big, showing off his pretty dental arch with the slightest curl at the end of his plush lips. His sharp figure juxtaposed perfectly with the softness of his nature. Sweet, tender, endlessly loving.
For you, it was effortless to fall for Sim Jaeyun.
âWhen would it be, then?â
Jake had gathered all his strength and courage to throw that question at you, wavering just a little when you answered with a dumbfounded frown and a quiet âWhat?â.
âWhen the fact that you pull me like magnets, opposites but still ridiculously attracting me towards you, would be the subject?â He asked, his hands pressing harder on your hips as if he was trying to ground himself out of his nervousness, as if he was struggling to not falter.Â
You arched an eyebrow, an unconscious smile creeping on your mildly swollen lips as your breath hitched. Before you could reply with another question, Jake continued, making it difficult to keep thinking coercively, since each of his words traveled straight into your heart.
ââCuz, pretty, itâs pathetic,â he chuckled as softly as his voice came out, head leaning to the side. âWhen Iâm with you I feel like Iâm a particle in motion, constantly accelerating in pure devotion,â Jake's orbs were so, so filled with softness and fondness as he kept on saying. One of his hands cupped your cheek and he brushed your lower lip. âYou make me feel like Iâm at the center of a black hole. No matter how much I try to escape, Iâm just pulled deeper into your gravity.â
With that you giggled, head being thrown back as the flustered heat creeped on your cheeks quickly, your eyes briefly flickering away from Jakeâs loving ones for a moment before glazing into them again, this time intensely exposing your vulnerable side.
You finally lowered your guard, allowing those same feelings you had been nurturing for years to come into the light to face the beautiful, thrilling possible outcome.
âDid you just confess your feelings for me using physics metaphors, Sim Jaeyun?â You asked with a playful glint in your eyes and a teasing smile that had Jake nuzzling his flustered face on your neck, holding back his own shy smile within a bit on his lower lip.
âYes. I, indeed, did,â he muffled against your skin, making you shiver a bit.
Your heart vibrated with pure, unexpected joy. Your afternoon had a turn you werenât waiting for, but now that it did, relief flooded your senses. Jake had feelings for you too.
Another giggle escaped your lips. Never in your wildest dreams had you imagined Jake confessing his feelings to you, let alone as you sat on his lap, sharing intimacy and knowing you were the ultimate reason for his body to be so reactive. Couldnât be more perfect, everything seemed too good to be true.
With a light lean back, enough to pull Jake away from your embrace, your eyes dropped to drink in his perfectly drawn full lips. The air shifted, this time, not only with a momentary lushness or vague desire how it used to be, but carried with a ton of something close to love as well.
You rolled your hips and Jake groaned, sensitive to you already.
âSo,â you purred, your teeth sank into your bottom lip, a mischievous grin tugging the corner of your mouth as you pushed yourself forward, making Jakeâs heart flutter as his back encountered the soft mattress of your bed. âDoes my pretty physics boy want me to suck him off while he lays down orâŠ?â
Jakeâs body instantly winced with the way your eyes darkened and how velvety your voice came out of your gorgeous lips; the nickname didnât go unnoticed either, causing his dick to twitch inside his pants.
Your touch feathery, yet trailing flames through his covered chest stirred up the deepests feelings he used to hide. Jake took in your reaction as a quiet yes or maybe a subtle âme tooâ. Knowing your nature so far, you would rather give him a head, as in a taste of your affection, than admitting out loud you liked him back.
Little did he know you were on the verge of panic, fighting the urge of shying away because, although he just confessed to you, you felt pathetically nourishing feelings way more intense towards him, with your heart pounding loud and unsteady and an overwhelming ache not-so-quietly overtaking your being.
You craved to give Jake your everything, to devour every centimeter of him if that meant being close â closer than words alone could ever take you. There were no syllables together to form a proper sentence that showed a quarter of what it felt to love Jake.
âIâ I honestly donât knowâŠâ Jake murmured as soft as fluffy clouds, contrasting your demeanor at that moment, with your lips now placing slow and soft kisses all over the sensitive flesh of his neck.
You chuckled when Jake started to squirm a little, his hands nervously gripping on your ass and quiet moans escaping his lips as you took your time to enjoy his warmth with your mouth. There was something so arousing about how Jake was always reactive to your touches, either the lightest or the more intense ones, his body clearly faltering deliciously under your control. It made your panties wet quite instantly.Â
When you started to nibble that same area, you also felt Jake bucking his hips upwards, as a way to get some friction to satisfy his neglected dick. Jake was very sensitive on his neck and didnât have to admit it out loud; the fact that he was getting harder and harder underneath you was enough to show it.Â
His puppy eyes lighted up with an adorable blender of curiosity and excitement under your piercing gaze when you lifted yourself to straddle, knees on each side of his hips. The same gaze roamed his whole clothed body as if you could see through it, ravishing each small portion with adoration.
Jake had an extra cute and confused expression taking over his face when you suddenly stood up and let him go out of the warmness of your body, a playful grin dancing on your lips as you softly tapped his thigh before saying.
âGet comfy, Jakey,â there was a thick layer of desire on your voice blended with a hint of mischievousness that got Jakeâs dick throbbing while he did as you said, propping himself on his elbows to properly lay on your bed.
You positioned yourself on top of him again, smiling cheekily as you lowered your face just enough to purr against his ear, your hot breath making him wince. âCuz Iâm about to make you forget your own name.â
The way Jakeâs eyes widened after hearing your non-filtered filthy words had you giggling, his Adamâs apple attractively bobbing up and down as he swallowed, your lips attaching to it because you truly wanted to devour Jake as whole.Â
âBut Jayââ He tried to reason with you, his hands betraying his rational side as he intensified the grip on your ass once again, pulling you down so he could rut against you; his pants growing uncomfortably tighter each passing second.
âShh,â you shushed him, gently pressing a finger on his plump lips before shaking your head. âHeâs not home,â you added, planting a few kisses along his neck, jawline and lastly on his lips, propping yourself up on your arms, one on each side of Jakeâs head.
A low moan escaped Jake at the sight of your fierce, determined gaze, fearing he wouldnât be able to handle whatever you had prepared in your mind. You stared at him like a predator about to strike a prey, and damn, you looked so unbelievably sexy doing it.
âItâs just the two of us.â
Just for a few brief moments, he thought, considering adding. But you seemed more unwavering than ever to follow through with your plan, and honestly? Jake didnât care anymore.
Not when you slowly stripped him down until only his underwear remained. Not when you were kissing and licking every centimeter of his chest and abdomen, your enchanting eyes giving innocent, pure glances that contrasted sharply with your every move. Not when he could feel your hands deliberately exploring every part of his warm skin, leaving trails of burning desire that were far too overwhelming for him to remain still.
When you paused at the waistband of his underwear, all Jake could do was breathe heavily, bite his lip, and watch you expectantly, his airways feeling like closing as you finally gave him the freedom he needed.Â
âYou have such a beautiful and big cock, Jakey,â you hummed with a smirk, tongue wetting your lips as you felt your mouth watering. Jake groaned when you grabbed the base and started pumping it, painful slowly, smearing the leaking precum to lubricate. âIâd love to feel it down my throat.â
And without a warning or leaving him to properly think about your words, you gave a long, savoring lick of his veiny length just to suck at the tip, eliciting an immediate moan within a thrust forward searching for more contact.
You kept swiping your tongue across his throbbing hardened dick, always finishing with a pop on the very end, and when you felt like your spit and his arousal had coated it enough to ease your movements, you opened your mouth wide to take him whole, each centimeter causing Jakeâs body to tremble and his voice to falter in between his groans.
When you had your nose bumping his lower stomach, you stood still, feeling Jakeâs hands caressing your hair kindly. You had to use your everything to remember to breathe with your nose, especially when the view of Jakeâs head being thrown on the pillow as he, himself, struggled to regulate his own breathing was unfolding right before your eyes.Â
Jake's body at that point was flaming hot, sweat dripping onto his forehead while his free hand clutched the sheet in a way to keep him sane, though your warm cavity embracing his dick, up and down, was leaving no room to maintain the silence.Â
âFuck, babyââ His voice was hoarse, consumed by the indescribable sensation of the way you took him so pleasurably, so skillfully, so delightfully. âTâTaking me so wellâŠâ
He waved his hips just slightly with his hands still on your head, bucking against your throat and unintentionally making you gag. He didnât feel sorry at all, not when you kept on your pace, barely giving a thought about it, even stirring a muffled moan out of you.
A choked whimper escaped Jakeâs swollen lips as he felt your throat pressing against his sensitive tip again. It was bizarre how it seemed like you had been molded just for him, and only him. Jake wanted you in every possible way and was grateful because you seemed to want him just as desperately.
You increased the rhythm little by little with hollow cheeks, giving some more attention with your mouth to Jakeâs reddened tip, tongue pressing at the slit every once and a while as your hands worked on the base and his balls.Â
There was a thin string of morality that held Jake in reality, preventing him from moaning your name â though he wanted so badly to â, but he couldnât help the following whimpers and small cries that left his throat, the flutter on his stomach indicating he was getting closer.Â
You noticed it almost right away after so many moments together. Jake always started to whine in between his noises and his body would shake within each minimal stimulus, squirming like he was growing desperate. So you quickly repositioned yourself, supporting your weight with your arms on the bed and staying still, eyes blinking expectantly at Jake, waiting.
âWhy did you stopââ Jake cut himself when he propped his head up from the pillow to look at you, another half-choked groan slipping out his parted lips when he caught the view. âDonât tell me you want me toâŠâ
You nodded, still waiting. Jake chuckled, in pure disbelief and desire, because you just had held yourself with your tongue poking out of your mouth, expecting him to simply throat-fuck you.
The way you were just⊠staring, patiently idling until Jake had your hair threaded through his slender fingers to finally move was an extremely alluring, sultry sight.
âYou have no idea of how sexy you look right now,â he muttered under his breath, lowering your head while resting on his free elbow, because there was no way in hell he would lose the enticing scene you were just about to give him.Â
Jake didnât know he would be able to endure much longer of that treatment you were giving him, his body extra sensitive as he bobbed your head up and down his cock; free using your body for his own pleasure sounded a lot out of his league and he took a mental note to repay later.Â
It took just seconds in that new position for you to have Jake rolling his eyes back with his mouth falling open, a quiet moan escaping as he speeded up his hands on your head before forcing you all the way down, pressing the tip of his throbbing cock on your throat while the thick ropes of his release filed straight down your throat.
You kept steady, motioning the swallowing movement to ride Jake through his high; it felt amazing to have him shaking in between random waves underneath you, soft whines coming out of his parted lips while the grip on your hair tightened.
As soon as he loosened the said grasp, you finally removed his now a bit softened cock out of your mouth, kissing it briefly before moving up to settle yourself on Jakeâs chest.Â
âThat was insane,â he whispered in between small pants, involving you with his arms. You cared little to nothing about his sweat sticking to you, knowing you both would have to take a quick bath before Jay got home.Â
âI know,â you replied back with a grin, looking at him and kissing his lips with passion, now free from your own fearsâ restraints.Â
You used to avoid sharing too many intimate moments with Jake, the aftercare barely happening due to your constant excuses to run away, scared of falling deeper into something you couldnât really grasp at. Not until that day.Â
It felt great to experience such loving touches without having to run away â light as sweet breeze fanning your face, your heart pounded in joy inside your chest, stomach fluttering with dancing butterflies.
You suddenly giggled, parting the kiss to glance at Jake with your adorable, playful eyes. He shot you back a tender gaze, waiting for your following words.
âYou didnât teach me about quantum,â you quirked an eyebrow and Jake immediately widened his eyes in panic.
âOh, shit.â
You laughed at his dramatic reaction, at how he wanted to leave the bed to grab his clothes and try to use the last minutes of your tutoring session to teach you anything.
âCalm down, big boy,â you pulled him back. âJayâs probably not even at home yet.â
As if you had summoned him, a knock on your door got you and Jake startled.Â
âY/N?â
Both of your bodies tensed immediately. With a jolt, Jake was rushing over to get his clothes from the floor and wear them as quickly as possible while you frantically patted down your hair and smoothed the wrinkled fabric of your shirt, wiping away any hint of lingering fluids from the corner of your mouth.
âComing!â You shouted, hurrying towards the door.
You cleared your throat, giving a final, stealthy glance over your shoulder to make sure Jake was, thankfully, no longer naked. When you opened the door, you greeted Jay with an overly bright, oh-so-forced smile, praying he would buy your attempt at casualness.
âHi!âÂ
ââŠIs everything alright? I heard some noises. It sounded like someone was in painâŠâ he replied, his brows knitting in concern.
âUhâŠâ Your mouth fell open and your eyes widened comically, your brain nearly visibly overheating, struggling to process an acceptable explanation.Â
You could closely feel Jakeâs gaze burning on your back as the realization that Jay might have heard pretty much everything.
âIt was me!â Jake interjected, cutting through the awkward silence with an impressive smoothness. âI, uh, stubbed my toe on Y/Nâs bed frame when I was heading to the bathroom,â he added with a sheepish chuckle.
âOh,â Jay replied, nodding with an air of understanding that sent a wave of relief through your tense shoulders, your smile naturally coming back to your face. âThat makes sense.â
However, Jake was naive enough to notice how his best friendâs eyes dropped briefly, as if scanning you two, a faint, knowing look flashing across his face before he added with a small, friendly smile
âIâll leave you two. Donât wanna interrupt your⊠Studies.âÂ
âThanks!â You were quick to answer. Almost too quick. âWeâre almost finished!â Your voice was stained enough to raise suspicions but you opted to ignore it.
As the door clicked shut, Jake exhaled with a low mutter, his fingers scratching through his hair. âI think he knows.â
âWhat!?â You exasperated, though trying to maintain your voice low. âThereâs no way!â
Jakeâs lips curled in a fond smile as he studied your adorable disbelief expression, hands finding comfort on your waist. For someone who just had partially sucked his soul out of his body through his cock, you were acting a bit almost innocent. He couldnât resist the urge to tease you, his fingers drawing circles on your hips.
âDid you really think he bought that excuse?â he chuckled softly, eyes gleaming with amusement.
âOf course he did!â You stomped your foot, crossing your arms.
Jake's hands slid from your waist just to gently unfold your arms, guiding them to his shoulders as he pulled you closer.
âI wish you were right, pretty girl, but I donât think weâve convinced him this time,â Jake said and sighed, your cheeks warming when he used a finger to tuck a strand of your messy hair on your ear. Your pout deepened and Jake giggled. âWho the hell moans when getting hurt, sweetheart?â He murmured, his voice soft, but his lips twitched in a playful smirk.
âI mean,â you started, flustered but trying to be reasonable, âthere are probably people whoââ Jake cut you off with a quick peck on your lips, startling you into silence as your protest dissolved into a surprised smile. The sweetness of the gesture caught you off guard, and a good warmth bloomed in your chest.
Definitely you would have to get used to that.
âI donât think he bought it, pretty,â Jake eyes traced over your features, his smile lingering longer as he studied each part of it. He caressed your cheek, brushing your bottom lip before kissing you, a delicious shiver running down your spine as he did so. âBut itâs fine, yeah? Weâll figure out something.â
The woman staring back at you in the mirror was expressing everything but âIâm casually going to study.â Sure, you had chosen a chill outfit, taking advantage of the sweet autumn breeze to wear one of your cozy sweaters, but you had left your legs bare, pairing it with a short skirt that framed your thighs perfectly. Perfectly enough to drive Jake insane.
It was amusing, thrilling even to see how he now reacted so openly, nearly pathetically to your provocations. Anytime you found yourselves in a safe space â mainly your room or the living room when you were absolutely sure Jay wasnât home â Jake would unleash a stream of shameless obscenities adoring you, his hungry gaze devouring your body without a care in the world. It always earned a laugh from you before you both gave in to the heat of the moment, leading to a long, intense kiss.Â
Today, you didnât know for certain if Jay was home, and frankly you didnât want to find out either. If he was, he would probably see you and question where you were going, an endearing yet slightly overprotective habit of his. So, you walked through the house as quietly as possible, practically on tiptoes, hoping he had been held up at work or had gone out with his friends, as he usually did on Fridays.
The evening was just setting in, and Jake had mentioned earlier that Sunghoon and Heeseung were going out that night, which was the main reason you had felt comfortable enough to head over â freedom. And, admittedly, because your finals were starting next week, and you genuinely wanted to review a few things with him, even â and luckily â if that meant to have his breathy moans brushing against your ear as he fucked you dumb.
With your nervous eyes hovering the apartment in search of anything that resembled your brotherâs presence, you finally reached the door, clicking it open with a relieved sigh.
However, fate had other plans for you.
âWhere are you going?â
You startled and stopped immediately on your tracks, turning in your heels with an awkward smile to see Jay standing near the dinner room door frame with a confused expression. You had forgotten that he normally sat there while working on boring stuff on his phone sometimes, where he could definitely see you passing by.
âUm... To Jake's.â You quietly told. âYâknow, my exams start on Monday, soâŠâ
Jay arched an eyebrow, his jaw clenching ever so slightly as his eyes roamed your body, his frown deepening within each passing second. Now you damned yourself for choosing such a short skirt.
With a brief nod after his silent inspection, he muttered. âOk.â
You squinted, tilting your head, your expression shifting to something almost investigative as you struggled to read Jay's reaction â a calmness that felt almost unsettling, like the lull before the storm. You half-expected him to ask dozens of questions, and the fact he didnât got you wavering, stomach twisting in a bitter anticipation.
âOkayâŠ?â you echoed, waiting for⊠something more.
âYeah, have fun.â He replied, shrugging slightly, hands being buried deep in his front pockets. âI mean, itâs physics. You canât really have fun with that,â he teased, but at the same time, you felt weird, like there was something more to it.
âUm, right,â you nodded, forcing a tense, small smile. âDefinitely canât.â
The words lingered in the air between you two, the air dense as volcano smokes; a volcano you trusted wouldn't erupt soon. Or at least you deeply hoped for it.Â
After a quick goodbye, you headed to Jakeâs house, having to deal with your stomach aching in nervousness after your brief interaction with Jay. You truly wished for your brother to be oblivious enough not to suspect anything more than he already had, nonetheless you and Jake werenât being that cautious about your ongoing relationship.
On the other side, the said man was patiently waiting for your arrival. He had just declined Heeseung and Sunghoonâs invitation to hang out as they usually did on Fridays, trying to sound as casual as possible when explaining you would be there soon to finish your studies, since you had exams the next week.
Bullshit.Â
Jake was playing with fire. Taunting the devil. Flirting with danger. Whatever.
He had a vain certainty that Jay was suspecting your relationship with him, especially after the last encounter in your room where your brotherâs eyes shifted briefly into something close to understanding beyond what he had seen.Â
Still, Jake called you over, praying for the best outcome instead of facing whatever consequences Jay would make him go through once he finds out he has been sleeping with his little sister.
Jake wasnât an only child, however, having an older brother didnât do much to help him in portraying being in your place.
Of course he would go insane if he had a little sister and she started to screw around with a friend of his, especially if she tried to hide it. But Jake didnât plan to be the asshole type, to use your body for his own satisfaction and discard you once he got bored, never. He couldnât even create a thought about leaving you at that point. His heart beat for you, and you only.Â
You became an important part of his life throughout the past weeks, months even. Since the moment you both allowed and agreed to the friends-with-benefits arrangement and it had evolved into something much deeper. Now, Jake found himself nurturing strongest feelings for you; it wasnât only about the curves of your body, the smoothness of your skin, the longing to have you all over him, no.Â
Jake could easily say he had fallen in love with you.
It was crazy how you got him wrapped around his finger â both abstractly and practically â, as if it was such an easy task to do.Â
Life with you was way more interesting and enjoyable. Jake could spend hours fucking you, yes, definitely. But nothing compared to having your body snuggled against his, the shared warmth leaving no room for anxiety, tiredness or sorrow.
After a tough day, all Jake wanted was to be with you, cuddling while receiving your shower of kisses and hearing your giggles as you did so.
Jake fell deeply in love with every part of your personality: how determined you overall were and especially when it was about to win him over, how rational yet emotional you could be, how genuine and at the same time assertive you expressed yourself when talking about your hobbies.
Acts of service were your primary love language, and Jake loved how you put in effort to express affection in such a thoughtful way, since the shared routine made it extra hard to ease your side.Â
Taking care of his tired body after he stayed on top of you for quite a long time, giving him water and cleaning him whole. Bringing his favorite coffee whenever he stopped to pick you up from college.Â
When you both actually studied, you didnât just listen to his explanations; you appreciated the effort he put into making even the most complex topics easy to understand. But more than that, you always did your best to make him feel comfortable. Whether it was adjusting the air conditioning when you saw him shivering or sweating, or quietly flipping the pages of the textbook when you noticed he had finished reading the last paragraph, your attention to detail never went unnoticed.
On a random day, Jake reached into his back pocket and found a small note you had quietly slipped there. It was a sweet declaration, simple but meaningful, words that reflected everything you didnât always say out loud.
He knew that you worked best through actions, but the note reminded him of the affection that was always present in every little thing you did.
The sound of the doorbell ringing had Jake jumping off the couch, eager to greet you. As the door swung open, he gave you no chance to breathe, pulling you closer to lessen the longing of the warmth of your body, his lips crashing onto yours with a fervor that told you everything you needed to know for now.Â
âHiâ To youâ Too!ââ You tried to mumble against the kiss, giggling at how desperate Jake was behaving while stumbling on your legs as you entered the house, struggling to follow his messy lead.
âWant you.â He whispered as a vain explanation, guiding you both to his room without a care in the world.
With a blink of a second your half-closed eyes caught his deep frown, and your smile faltered while your body tensed straightaway. It triggered a strange feeling in your chest to perceive Jakeâs urgency. You sensed something was off, weird even; you had just left home under Jay's analytical gaze, knowing you were hiding a huge secret from him, one he could be absurdly close to discovering â or maybe he already had. Now, with Jakeâs unforeseen demeanor, if you forced yourself hard enough to connect the dots, you would say the man kissing you was holding some information back.
Or atleast holding something back.Â
âWait, waitââ You tried to break the sloppy kiss by pushing Jakeâs chest lightly, away enough to attempt to pry an explanation out of him without his mouth devouring yours. âWhat happened?â
Jakeâs eyes roamed your concerned face briefly, a flicker of hesitation flashing before he smiled tenderly. His hands on your hips pressed the area ever so mildly, as though he fought a way to anchor him, as if he suddenly started fearing to lose your touch.
You didnât buy his smile.
âCanât a man miss his woman?â
His woman.
Though the manner of addressing you had your heart swirling in a sweet, thrilling carousel and your cheeks warming up, you couldnât help the growing bittersweetness slowly and painfully swallowing your entire being.Â
âYes, you can,â you didnât hold back your half-smile before your eyes softened, nearly teetering a probing, piercing one as your hands softly caressed Jakeâs face. âBut I feel like thereâs something more.â
Jakeâs breath hitched, not due to how intense he was kissing you just seconds ago, but mostly because you were so fucking right.
Jake had a problem sleeping last night after you confirmed you would visit him the next day. Excitement? No. Fear.
Inviting you over to his place felt like a way of grounding the relationship, making it real. Alongside the once-conflicted feelings that had now settled comfortably into love, there was the weight of responsibility to bring you into his world, to make it real for everyone, make it real to his best friend. To your brother.
Jake wasnât exactly afraid of his friendship with Jay falling apart. Though hurtful, he for sure could find ways to live through it. He did worry about you. To Jay, you were family â true family, tied by blood. If things went wrong, you wouldnât have the luxury of cutting ties; you would be forced to navigate whatever fallout happened. Jake hoped fervently that it wouldnât come to that, that you wouldnât have to face a harsh reality just because you both liked â loved â each other.Â
Yet, a new sense of resolve was rising within him, making him believe that no matter the outcome, he would do whatever it took to keep you by his side. Fighting for you felt easy. Making you happy was his ultimate goal.Â
Jake would cross oceans, move heaven and earth if that meant to stay with you.
So, you were right, because he was overthinking the possibility of telling Jay about your relationship. But before, there was going to be a relationship to begin with.
âWill you be my girlfriend?âÂ
Jake caught on your body shifting and backing away a little, your breath stuttering, eyes widening, wavering before his proposal. He found himself panicking within a snap prior to your silence, cursing internally for letting his feelings take over and the question to escape his lips.
A bit longer. Just a bit longer he should have waited to understand where you stood emotionally when the subject was the two of you, because beyond considering your feelings, Jay was in the equation as well, difficulting the possibilities of the said relationship to blossom.Â
There was no coming back, though. The words flew out of his mouth, lingering in the air and weightening it as you quietly processed what you had just heard, wondering if you were tripping.Â
Jake gulped and immediately started to ramble, fumbling over his words with a voice that broke a bit once and a while as he did so, trying to cover up the angushing lack of noises between you both.
To some extent, Jake feared you would somehow hear his heart beating in panic.Â
âYou donât have to accept,â he began, his voice unsure, yet full of vulnerability. âI mean, weâre seeing each other almost everyday, and I really have feelings for you and maybe... Maybe you feel the same? For me?â He hesitated, puppy eyes wide and glistening with hope and desperation searching for any sign from you. He found nothing.
âLâLike, weâre having sex quite often and I like your company a lot,â he stammered. âIâd love to call you my girlfriend. I know thereâs Jay and heâs your brother and he may not accept it, but Iâm willing toââ
âShut up.â You cut him off sharply by pressing a finger on his mouth.
A deep frown marked your forehead as you pondered thoughtfully, your gaze focusing on some random spot down the hallway behind Jakeâs back, your mind racing.
Jake froze, eyes growing bigger at your reaction, his lips pursing together in a small, adorable pout that made your heart twist.
âOk.â
You almost felt guilty for making him go through whatever was racing in his head; hearing his voice falter made your chest ache. At the same time, you couldnât blame yourself, not when Jake had literally just asked you to be his girlfriend.
It was the question, the most important one of your life so far, the very one you had dreamed of hearing from him with his attractive Australian accent, nearly bordering a childish fantasy.Â
âPlease, just say somethingâŠâ Jake pleaded, voice cracking with anxiety. âEven if itâs a noâŠâ
His words hit you like a wave crashing onto rocks. Your head snapped towards his direction, your wide eyes shooting a skeptical, confused glance, increasing his own confusion. Jake tilted his head to the side, just like a puppy, and then the realization hit.Â
âWhat?â You exclaimed, a hint of laughter tempting to burst out. âNo! Babe, noâŠâ
There was a clear layer of desperation on your voice now, as you shook your head frantically and sweetly placed countless kisses on Jakeâs plump lips, cupping his face gently to keep him steady. He tried to ignore how his chest burned deliciously with the pet name.
âGod, no, Iâd never say no,â you muttered, his breath of relief fanning your face kindly, enough to ease your own heart. âI was just⊠Taken aback. I never expected my lifelong crush to ask me to be his girlfriend,â you giggled as you said, feeling a fluster creep up your neck towards your face.Â
Jakeâs half-open eyes enjoyed the tenderness touch you showered him with, but then he suddenly dropped to something similar to confusion again, pulling back just slightly to look you in the eyes.
âSorry, lifelong crush? Me?â His voice was a mix of disbelief and amusement.Â
You laughed again, the sound light and full of affection before you hid yourself on the crook of his perfumed neck; the scent easing your senses right away.Â
âYes, you,â you mumbled, shyly. âYouâ You have been on my mind for quite a long time, Jaeyun,â to admit it out loud had you even more embarrassed, so you choose not to pinpoint precisely when. Not for now. Gladly, he didnât push you as well. He would make the most of it later on.
âSoâŠâ He trailed off, pushing you off your hideout to offer you the most beaming expression you ever saw him having.
Jake was so, so gorgeous, with his wide, contagious smile, the soft curve at the ends framing it perfectly. Eyes sparkling with adoration, giving you the most tender and expectant look.
âYes, Jake. Iâd like to be your girlfriend.â
âMhm,â he nodded, feigning a cool, relaxed demeanor you both knew wasnât actually true, trying to hide the actual urge to jump like crazy behind a mischievous smirk. You arched an eyebrow, expectation growing slowly in your chest. âWhere should I first take you as my girlfriend now?â
You giggled, biting your bottom lip with a naughty smile as you felt your heart palpitating harder; Jake would always be your crush after all. And to know you had him as your boyfriend only increased your arousal amidst the unfolding talk.
âHow about your room, mhm?â A finger slowly traced his jawline, eyes dropping to something more intense. âBet you have a lot of physics stuff in there, am I right?âÂ
Jake laughed at your subtly mocking, yet naive words, especially because you both knew you werenât wrong at all â and where that type of conversation would lead.
âOh, you have no idea, darling,â he shot back, mirroring your tone as he pressed you back against his bedroom door, pushing it open with a deliberate motion. âGotta show you how physics explains some⊠very special positions, yeah?â
You werenât entirely sure how it happened, since things with Jake usually escalated quickly once your lips met, but now he was hovering over you, his firm body pressing you into the bed, kissing you slowly and consumingly, as his fingers roamed over every centimeter of exposed skin.
You were well aware of how tempted Jake was by your legs â one of the reasons you had chosen that particular skirt â but you were uncertain if you would ever get used to how he grasped at you, his fingers digging in as though he needed to pull you closer, as if he desperately wanted to break the laws of physics and turn you both into one single body, occupying the same space.
Each time he rocked forward, grinding himself against you in search of any fleeting relief, waves of heat and excitement coursed through your veins straight to your core.
When a soft moan escaped, the noise vanished in between the heated touch and Jake lost composure. His mouth left yours only to travel lower, finding the sensitive line of your neck, lips pressing eagerly, his tongue tracing over the spots he knew would make you shiver, followed by a soft scrape of his teeth as he teased every weak point with deliberate care.
Your nails dug into his shoulder as your head fell back onto his pillow, granting him full access, your other hand tangling in the softness of his brown locks, gently tugging as his lips moved with purpose. But Jakeâs impatience was hard to miss. He drifted down to your jawline, then lower, hands trying to slip beneath your sweater in an attempt to feel more of you.
âNo,â you tugged his head back by his hair. âNo, no, no. Listen, I get youâre excited and believe me, I am too, butââ You tried to speak between the sloppy kisses Jake continued planting along your jaw, a clear attempt to quiet you. âWe have to study.â
âPlease,â he breathed, a whine escaping him, not giving a care about how tight you gripped his strands, lowering himself, nuzzling his nose against the fabric of your sweater. âPlease, I need you. I need to feel you.â
âWe have to study.â You echoed what you just said and somehow it seemed to be rather to bring you back from the blissful lust than to take Jake away from it.
âPlease,â with a plea, Jake locked his eyes onto yours, his voice thick with desperation.
You swallowed nothing as you saw deep, raw, intense desire once you met his gaze.
Jake had his two beautiful orbs oozing with craving, with need. His jaw was clenched, his features somewhat sharper under the dim light of his room. The sight nearly made you moan aloud, perhaps longing to have Jake between your legs more than him himself.Â
The blaze in your stomach increased as he leaned down slowly, fierce eyes still glazed onto yours, little by little decreasing the distance between his face and your still covered cunt, teasing to get under your skirt.
You knew exactly what Jake wanted. He had hinted at it so many times it was almost impossible not to relent. And yet, despite the power he somehow had over your decisions in moments like these, sending you easily into a haze of desire, you were a woman of your word.
âNo,â you murmured, reluctantly pushing his head away and sitting up. âDo you remember our deal?â
Jake's gaze flickered, torn between your tempting thighs with the pretty skirt framing them perfectly and the inflexible expression on your face, the frustration evident. God, he could already picture himself getting lost in between your legs, your thighs squishing his head because he was pleasuring you so good. And preferably wearing the exact same skirt you wore.
âFine,â he huffed, rolling his eyes like a scolded child. âLetâs study so you can ace that fucking exam.â
You bit back a grin as you read Jakeâs pouty face, reaching over to grab the collar of his white shirt and pull his body onto yours one last time, starting a slow, savoring kiss. You sucked his bottom lip within a quiet smack sound as you drew back.
âSorry, canât help myself,â you muttered with a cheeky smile, eliciting a chuckle from Jake.Â
Your eyes tracked the motion of his tongue sweeping across his swollen, reddened lips, stealing any lingering remnant of your taste before standing on his foot.
âYouâre trouble,â he said while offering you a hand. âAnd I like that.â
When he headed you over his desk, you smirked, ignoring the slap he gifted your ass with before sitting.Â
âSo, sound waves, huh?â you purred, fingers tracing over the open page before looking up at him with a playful glint. âIâm curious how youâd explain it to me.â
Jake would always follow the same flow. He would start with you beside him, explaining the concepts from the book in simple terms, and you would initially go along, absorbing the material through the practical examples Jake offered so effortlessly.
But then your attention would start to drift â to the way his lips moved, the soft, deep resonance of his voice that seemed to echo through your entire body, the way his slender fingers moved as he gestured with every point he made... And soon, Jake would begin to lose his composure, deciding to take a far more hands-on approach to his âteaching.â
After a call from Jay asking what was taking so long for you to go home â an unusual demeanor that got goosebumps spreading over your skin â and a lame excuse that you were deeply focused on reviewing the materials for your exam, you ended up back on Jakeâs bed, on all fours with his hardened, throbbing dick pounding fast into you.
âThe louder you scream,â Jake thrusted deep, hitting your g-spot tirelessly, making you cry his name out just like he was saying. âThe greater the amplitude of the sound waves. It carries more eâenergy.â
âFuck, Jake,â you rolled your eyes, though no one could actually see you doing that.Â
Your hands clutched the colorful sheets underneath you as a way to keep yourself sane, to maintain your conscience stable and grounded; you doubted you wouldnât even remember your name, nonetheless. It was hard to think of anything else other than Jakeâs name being chanted by your tired throat, Jakeâs dick buried deep into you, Jakeâs hands grasping your hips to keep you still, Jakeâs desperate moans, searching for his release. Jake was everywhere.Â
âSoâ deepââ You whined, your walls clenching around his length, your dripping juices coating precisely each part of it.Â
âYeah, babe?â Jakeâs voice dropped an octave, squeezing your hips hard enough to leave marks. The fleeting thought made him groan, because it sounded like you were his propriety. âLike my cock deep into your pussy, mhm?â
âFucking hell, yes,â you faltered on your arms, dropping almost completely on the bed if wasnât for Jakeâs steady grip on your waist.Â
You could feel his dick twitching inside your cunt, the realization he was getting close sparking up in between the haze bliss you were going through, lost in pure, raw desire. Jake was fucking you so good.
âSo fucking perfect,â Jake managed to say with trembling voice and between groans before his rhythm grew frantic, uneven, irregular. âMy good girl, isnât that right?â
You agreed within a mumble, not able to form proper words, eliciting a chuckle from Jake.Â
âI want your cum,â you said muffled, somehow finding strength to force your body back and meet Jakeâs thrusts. âI want it so bad, Jakeyââ
After testing words, dirty talks, movements, even decisions when sharing those moments with Jake, you managed to select a few things you could do to drive him insane, near the edge almost instantly. So it took just a few pumps for you to be filled with Jakeâs warm liquid, his orgasm hitting strong as he threw his head back, choking in between a long, delicious moan. He held you still, his dick deep into you as his body shuddered, hips stuttering while he enjoyed his overwhelming pleasure.Â
With a hiss Jake released you from his grip, removing his length slowly, eliciting a discontent whine from you since not only you didnât cum, but also felt the immediate lack of fulfillment and the feeling of his seed dripping down your legs. His hooded eyes were blurry, but he caught a brief view of it together with your slightly bruised skin before dropping his exhausted body onto the bed. Hot.
You quietly watched as he laid near you, how his chest rose and fell heavily, the known silver necklace moving together with it; you took the opportunity to come back to yourself, regulating your own breathing and regaining control of your body â deep down you knew Jake was just getting ready to give you your own climax. However, a mischievous plan popped into your mind and you couldnât let it slide so easily, not when you finally had the chance of hearing him screaming your name without fearing your brother.Â
âLemme ride you,â you muttered suddenly and moved to position yourself on top of Jake, hands finding support on his torso, straddling with a knee on each side of his body.
âBabe, wait a bitââ He said within a frown, but not really doing anything to stop you; he just rested his palms on your waist, watching you grab his slightly softened shaft to align on his lower stomach. âDoll, pleaseââ When you wiggled your hips to fit your wet, warm folds in his cock and started to deliberately grind, he nearly screamed. âPlease, stopââ
Your eyes darted over his contorted face, not halting your movements as you did so, a soft moan leaving your mouth.
Such a lustful sight. Jake had his beautiful and swollen lips parted, silent, whispered pleas escaping it as his brows furrowed deeper; eyes closed tightly, cheeks flustered and breaths coming out ragged, mixed with airy moans that only intensified as you started to rut back and forth faster.
âPlease, babe, âm sensitiveââÂ
Jake felt his head spinning, quite literally as he squirmed and abstractly, nonsense words cutting through the thick air, because, God, it felt so strangely good to be overstimulated by you.Â
âDo you want me to really stop, Jakey?â You asked sweetly, yet a bit concerned that he was actually not enjoying it as you leaned forward to suck the skin of his sensitive neck.
He moaned. Like, really moaned and shook his head frantically.
âMhm, fuckââ You lifted your body again just in time to catch his eyes rolling and fluttering close. âDâDonât you dare to, fuck, to stopââÂ
You kept on rolling your hips with a grin dancing on your lips. Jakeâs sensitive tip touched your clit even so often, provoking your body to spasm a little. You aimed to get him hard again, so you could finally fuck yourself and achieve your orgasm, and because of the earlier interaction of your bodies you werenât that far from coming.
Jake opened his eyes lazily, taking in the view of your exposed chest that quickly was being abused by his big hands, pinching your hardened nipples and kneading the soft flesh of them. You threw your head back, mouth falling open with the feeling of Jake touching almost everywhere.
At some point, Jakeâs length was completely stiff beneath you and you took no time to position you in your pulsing hole, sinking in one go that had you and Jake throwing heads back with loud moans.Â
Your breath was irregular when you propped your hands on each side of Jakeâs face, starting to bounce in an unwavering pace that, together with the way you locked eyes with Jake, fierce and full of determination to finish, got him moaning within a smirk, proudly.
âLook at you,â Jake cooed at you, his voice hoarse, hands raising to tenderly tuck a strand of hair behind your ear to give him the full view of your pleasant contorted face.
âYes, that's it,â he encouraged, sliding his fingers down your sides, squeezing it mildly; his lips stretching into a bigger smirk when you started to whimper and clench around his length. âRide it, baby. Use me to get yourself off.â
And so you did, speeding up your rhythm as you chased desperately for your own release and consequently led Jake towards his â he was extra reactive due to the overstimulation, so at that point he was practically holding himself back not to cum again, craving to keep on feeling your tight walls squeezing his dick and eventually you creaming it.
Jake was big, hard and deliciously leaking inside you, his tip reaching your g-spot with ease and constancy, enough to make you start to scream as your moans grew louder. When his slender fingers found their place on your clit, rubbing fast circles to help you out, you couldnât help but close your eyes with your mouth agape, a blender of whimpers and whines melodically falling from your lips as your arms began to fail to hold you in that position, making you slightly falter forward.
âJâJakeâ ugh, fuck, so fucking goodââ You stammered amidst cries of pleasure, feeling the coil in your low stomach teasing a strong build up.
At the same time your thighs began to burn, frustration emerging together with your desperation to cum, your own body betraying your release as you wavered the pace. Within seconds Jake took notice of how exhausted you were starting to act, and in no world he would let his girl down, so to maintain the same posture he propped his legs up, feet planted on his bed as he whispered for you to stop for a second.
âJust⊠Trust me,â he mumbled after seeing your confused face while letting go of your sensitive bundle of nerves from his skilled fingers to grab your ass, full hands in each cheek, holding you still as he started to push himself upwards.
You rolled your eyes quite instantly, letting your body fall onto his, your face finding its place on the curve of his pretty neck, where you started to pant and messily kiss in between your heavy breaths. Jake was leading the entire moves, pushing you down and pulling him up, heavenly deep.Â
Each desperate, frantic, urgent thrust was leading you closer to your climax; you could sense it was going to be a strong one, and your whiny moans gave it away for Jake, who found himself teetering the edge as well.
âCloseâ âm closeâ So closeââ He cried, feeling his dick leaking precum already.Â
With a snap you let it go completely, your body shaking in uneven spasms as your juices fully coated Jakeâs length within a long, striking moan. His own release followed yours, since your clenching cunt and the lewd wet noises as he rode you through your high left no room for any sanity or self-control.Â
Jakeâs big hands squeezed the flesh of your ass, shoving his cum inside you and the rhythm slowly faltered, hips stuttering as the last waves of pleasure coursed through both of you.
The room suddenly shrank as you both started to deliberately drift away from the blissful raze of raw arousal, nearly gasping for air as you did so.Â
âDonât pull out,â your words sounded more slurred than you expected, but the sweet silence in the air helped Jake to understand you, still experiencing the aftershocks of his orgasm.
âHoly.âÂ
It was everything he managed to say before the quietness took over again. You felt Jake caressing your bare back, slowly and tenderly, filled with an affection you wanted to receive only from him, fluttering the butterflies in your belly.
Eventually he was stroking your hair and hugging you close, his length still inside of you, prolonging the amazing sensation of being full. And somehow, you fell in love even harder.
âSo thatâs what freedom tastes like?â You heard Jake mumbling against your ear after a while, his honeyed voice cutting through the air kindly, and a tired laugh escaped your lips.
You couldnât help the small sting in your heart as you heard the question, afterall, none of those escaping and hiding moments would be happening if he wasnât your brotherâs best friend. You wanted to be able to love Jake openly. And hoped he could love you back just as much.Â
âYeahâŠâ You whispered within a broken smile that Jake didnât catch.Â
âI may grow addicted to it.â
Jake wanted you to stay for the night, caring little to nothing about whatever could happen if Sunghoon and Heeseung found out. But you werenât worried about them that much, you could easily coax your way out of it.Â
You were frightened of your brother.Â
So after a soothing warm shower to calm your nerves and with Jake reassuring you that the excuse you had created was perfectly convincing, you headed back, praying for Jay to be sleeping already or, even better: not at home.Â
You moved as quietly as possible, trying not to make a sound while unlocking the door, like a teenager sneaking in after breaking curfew, heart racing in anticipation of being caught.
It was so weird to have that feeling, to hide things from your brother, the one you trusted blindly because he would never judge you. Still, the situation was fragile, unusual. It was a new territory where if you pushed too far, the consequences could be far worse than you were prepared to handle.
Jake somehow eased your stirring anxiety with his sweet words and calming voice when he embraced you in a last comforting hug before you left.Â
âHe would never be mad at you, darling.â
With Jakeâs voice whispering tenderly in your head like a mantra, you finally opened the front door, stepping into the darkness of your apartment.Â
A deep sigh of relief escaped as you closed the door behind you, careful not to make a sound, the faint click of the lock triggering a shiver that quickly vanished as you realized you might be alone. You could practically feel how your tensed shoulders loosed as you started to casually slip off your boots.
âSo, how was it with Jake?â
You froze in place, back turned to where the voice came from.
Jay.
The lights suddenly turned on, but you had no courage to turn and face your brother, especially after feeling the burning sensation on your back that told you he was staring unwaveringly. The question hung in the air, thick and tense, as much as your body began to feel right after. His voice wasnât accusing, but it still carried an underlying heavy weight you feared to understand completely.Â
"It was fine," you forced out, trying to keep your voice steady, but it came out thin, shaky. The lie tasted bitter on your tongue as you unfortunately became aware it wasnât enough to fool him. Not anymore. âWâWe studied sound waves and⊠Watched a documentary. About it. He ordered food too⊠It was⊠Cool.â
Your sentences were barely coercive. Unstable, insecure, because your mind was no longer working properly. Telling blatant lies was something you never imagined yourself doing to Jay, and you certainly couldnât consider yourself good at it at all.Â
Still, you pushed through, trying your hardest to sound convincing, desperately hoping to make it through the day. Your body was screaming for a proper rest, drained from the adrenaline and energy spent earlier that Jay was oblivious so far.
Maybe the next day would be easier â maybe confronting Jay wouldnât feel so impossible.
âYeah?â Jay muttered and you finally turned on your heels to look at him.
He was leaning on the wall, smiling â but not a very pleasant smile. He had his hands shoved inside his trousersâ pockets, jaw clenched, eyes fierce, cutting through you as if he read your deepest secrets. You gulped nervously, hands starting to tremble; you could feel your heart pounding in your eardrums.Â
âDid he teach you about sound waves while you screamed his fucking name?â
Your instant reaction was to almost mutter a quiet and confused âhow did you know?â, your face dropping as the panic started to crawl in your skin. You just got caught and you had nowhere to run.
âDid he tell you two were alone, Y/N?â
Your heart dropped to your stomach immediately as he questioned and started to walk. Each step Jay took towards you felt like a heavy drumbeat, as if time had slowed down painfully, weightening the atmosphere absurdly, grounding you way too much; it felt as though heavy shackles with iron balls were bound to each of your feet, holding you in a way that left you suffocated and powerless. Excruciatingly overwhelming.Â
âBecause you probably were.â He stopped in front of you, his nostrils moving within each ragged breath. You could picture the haze of pure anger his mind got lost through his fierce eyes, eyes that never left yours. âDuring the first hour.â He added between gritted teeth and you shivered, your eyes widening as you took a step back, fearing falling because as realization hit, you practically felt the ground being pulled from beneath your feet.
There was no way Jake had lied to you, right? Leading you into a trap just to ruin your relationship with your brother. Why would he do that? You couldn't believe it, because that wasnât the Jake you knew â it wasnât the Jake who had just asked you to be his girlfriend with eyes shining with passion before giving you one of the most heartfelt kisses you had ever experienced. Jake wouldnât do that.
How did your brother find out, then?
Jay shook his head slightly, his expression hardening further before a bitter, dry laugh escaping his pursed lips. He saw the look of disbelief in your eyes, the shock written all over your face and he read it precisely.
"No, Jake didnât tell me,â he explained briefly to your racing thoughts. âHe just didnât know Sunghoon would be home earlier than expected."
Jay, though clearly upset, spoke with an edge of reassurance. His voice was low, barely concealing the tension and irritation simmering beneath it, still, worried about you.
A cold wave sprang in your chest as the realization struck like a bolt of lightning, your body quivering with fear and your wide, glistening eyes teasing to collapse in tears. You felt exposed. Vulnerable. Your secret was no longer a secret, and you instantly cursed yourself for holding it secretly to begin with.
Stupid, dumb, idiot.
Jay took a deep breath and you, another step back, trying to run away from the radiating rage coming out of his frightening presence. Jay was bigger and taller than you, and right at that moment, you felt even smaller.
âDo you have any idea of what it's like to find out that my little sister is screwing around with my best friend? And worse â hiding it from me?â
Jay didnât yell, in fact his voice was dropping an octave, low as possible, and was more than enough to leave you on the verge of crying, your eyes stung, averting his angry ones. You lowered your head.
âI'm sorry, Jay, Iââ
âWasn't thinking correctly? Didn't think I'd find out? Cut off with your lame excuses, Y/N.âÂ
It was the first time Jay talked to you with such a cold tone, sharp as a knife, yet quiet. Something about the fact that he was mad, and still had a lowkey calm voice triggered the worst on you.Â
âYou lied to me, Y/N. Lied.â His voice faltered, but only for a moment. The raw emotion in his words was enough to pierce through the façade he had been trying to maintain, his eyes glimmering with tears, bringing the worst from your own feelings towards the situation.
Your breath hitched, the sting of betrayal and guilt washing over you. Unfortunately though, Jay wasnât finished.Â
âWe promised not to lie to each other, Y/N. And you broke that promise.â His eyes burned into you, like they were seeing right through the walls you had built to shield yourself, the same barriers Jay once helped you to create, to feel stronger before the ones who tried to destroy your dreams. To destroy you.
For seconds, you saw your parents on Jay. For a brief moment, you pictured your younger self being scolded for your small mistakes and decisions, never being good enough. For the slightest millisecond, you hated your brother.
âGo to your room.â
You lifted your confused eyes only to see Jay cleaning his tears with the back of his hand.Â
âAre you grounding me?â You asked quietly, but a hint of angriness stirred to snap out.Â
Jay chuckled again, humorless. âNo,â he gave you a last look with a mild head shake. âI just canât see you now,â his sincerity was like a slap on your face. And you had no doubt that receiving one would hurt way less. âAnd youâre old enough to know youâve fucked things up big time.â
Saying you cried all night would be an understatement. Having feelings for Jake now felt like a bittersweet ache, hard to swallow and to have close to you. You couldnât help but get into a spiral of darker thoughts.
Was it worth it?
part 2
#jake x reader#sim jake x reader#jake sim x reader#jake smut#jake fanfic#enhypen x reader#enhypen smut#heegyukeluv works
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Play Pretend | Charles Leclerc x Law Student! Reader
Summary: He's Lightning McQueen. You're Elle Woods. But, when Charles misses you, he makes it known that perhaps your career isn't as important as his wishes to start a family.
Warnings: Swearing. Angst. Baby fever? Miscommunication.
Female reader with various faceclaims. Pics found on Pinterest.
2024 but some events switched aroundÂ
I'm trying to make all of these different to each other so I'm sorry that this one was less baby fever and more baby mention.
Main Masterlist
next.
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
YourUserName just posted
liked by maxverstappen1, francisca.cgomes and othersÂ
YourUserName the cause of stress v. the support systems  tagged: charles_leclerc, YourBestFriend
6,883 comments
User1 i love how all her captions ft her degree are legal themedÂ
charles_leclerc â€ïžđ
charles_leclerc mon ange, what are you doing in that second photo
â YourUserName itâs probably best you donât know, char
â YourBestFriend cocktails were involved
â charles_leclerc this is why i donât like leaving her with youÂ
â YourBestFriend cry me a river, vroom vroom boyÂ
lilymhe i still think i would be a better support system than charles
â YourUserName and i fully agree. letâs run away together
â alex_albon whoa, whoa, whoa. get your own girlfriend
â charles_leclerc she already has her own girlfriend!Â
â charles_leclerc wait, no
â User2 the prettiest girlfriend
User3 i swear charles and y/n are the cutest f1 couple
â User4 they always look so infatuated with each otherÂ
â User5 umm, how? she's literally never at racesÂ
â User6 because sheâs off being successful in her own way, and charles supports that? plus, sheâs always snapped in ferrari merch on race days whether sheâs there or not
â User7 omg yes! when a classmate took a pic of her leaving a final in bright red, and she was easily the most spottable person in that hallÂ
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by pierregasly, arthur_leclerc and others
charles_leclerc welcome home baby leo tagged: YourUserName
12,298 comments
YourUserName my two favourite boys â€ïž
User8 did you see in the background of one of the pics, they have his âbirth certificateâ framed and it says leo leclerc-y/l/n. he truly is their child
roscoelovescoco canât waitâs to seeâs a newâs friend inâs the paddockâsÂ
â User9 roscoe-leo play date when please
â User10 not until 2025 đ
User11 but letâs all take a moment to appreciate how cool leoâs parents are. he has an f1 racer for a dad, and a fashionable law student for a mum
â User12 haha his parents are lightning mcqueen and elle woodsÂ
pierregasly thanks mate. now kika is going to want one
â YourUserName and you should give her one. i need a mum friendÂ
User13 first they adopt ollie and now leo. whoâs next
â YourUserName oscar
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
User1 the interviewer was asking about future races and charles wasted no time in bringing up his girlfriend. heâs so down badÂ
User2 the way his face lights up when he talks about her. he really does love her.Â
User3 oh Charles, honey, thatâs not giving what you think it isÂ
User4 any other woman slightly uncomfortable with the way this was worded?
â User5 lets all take a moment to remember that english isnât his first language. he obviously meant well, and the love in his eyes shows that heâs excited about a life with y/n, it just wasnât worded in the best wayÂ
User6 the interviewer was so skeezy for that last comment though
User7 i feel so bad for y/n. sheâs always so supportive of charles' races, even when sheâs not there, and charles is talking about how he can't wait for her to be done with her degree so she can follow him around the worldÂ
â User8 i donât think he meant it that way. he looked horrified when the interviewer interpreted it that way but the interview ended before he could clarify furtherÂ
User9 do we think mom and dad are fighting after his *slightly* misogynistic comments about making her a kept woman
â User10 i really hope not but my heart says yes because he basically said heâll turn her into a travel wife who only cares about his career but said nothing about her career that sheâs working really hard on
User11 i didnât realise how much i depended on y/nâs post race posts until i didnât get one
â User12 she always posts the most panty-dropping post race charles picsÂ
User13 i miss them alreadyÂ
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
User1 oh god, itâs official
User2 brb just gonna go cry my eyes out for an hourÂ
User3 literally half of her insta posts have disappeared because they were all charlesÂ
â User4 the only thing keeping me sane is that any post where he wasnât the main focus but slightly in them have been keptÂ
User5 can someone check on ollie? see how heâs coping as a child of divorceÂ
liked by OllieBearman
User6 yes, yes. this is all very sad but now that iâm done crying, can we talk about what is going to happen with leo? is this going to be a shared custody agreement?
â User7 how could i forget about leo. do you think theyâll see each other at child drop off or make arthur be the middle man?
User8 i can't believe they just got a puppy together and now theyâre going to be co-parenting instead :(Â
User9 maybe this is just a minor speed bump in the road to their everlasting happiness? (yes, iâm hoping that theyâre simply taking a small break)
â User10 may all your delulus come trululu
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
YourUserName just posted
liked by lilymhe, arthur_leclerc and othersÂ
YourUserName the verdict is unanimous⊠Iâm stressing
3,880 comments
YourBestFriend this barbies practices law
â YourBestFriend not long left, babe. just a couple of exams and weâre qualified adults
â YourUserName i donât think we should ever be classed as qualified adults lolÂ
â YourMum i still can't get over the fact that you two used to play pretend lawyers as little girls and now you're actually going to be one
lilymhe good luck, y/n. youâre gonna smash these!Â
â YourUserName if not, fancy running me over with your golf cart?Â
arthur_leclerc good luck, y/n/n. try not to drink too much caffeineÂ
â YourUserName iâm not that bad!Â
â arthur_leclerc you cannot lie to me. i have had to listen to you after three red bulls
â landonorris betrayal!Â
User1 sheâs so real for that last slide tho. like miss y/l/n you are gorgeous and weâre glad you know it
YourClassmate how do you look so nice despite being in the library until 2am?
â User2 dude, no. that line is not going to pull the stunning y/n y/l/n
â User3 literally, the love of her life is charles leclerc and this guy thinks heâs going to win her over with a bad lineÂ
User4 guys, is anyone else missing the sweet comments charles would always leaveÂ
â User5 he would be agreeing with the last slide and telling her how beautiful and smart she isÂ
â User6 how about we donât remind her of her ex-boyfriend the day before her life-changing exams
carlossainz55 good luckđ€đŒ
â User7 not sainz being messy on main
ââââââ àŒ»đ„žàŒș ââââââ
charles_leclerc just posted
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charles_leclerc there is nothing like racing in italy for ferrari. i wish we had a better result, but that was the maximum today. weâll try again next week.Â
8,449 comments
User9 did you see his interview of him on his way out of the paddock? man was in a rush with poor leo tucked under his arm
â User10 itâs y/nâs week with leo so charles was running out there because it was time to go see his favourite girlÂ
â User11 he was not wasting a minute to see the love of his lifeÂ
User12 charles racing faster to go see his ex-girlfriend who heâs wildly obsessed with than he did all weekendÂ
â User13 bestie you better pray he doesnât see thisÂ
â User14 why? âcause heâll have to fight the urge to like itÂ
User15 iâm so happy that itâs y/nâs week with leo because weâre going to get the most adorable puppy pics on her story all week
â User16 also it means that his parents will be conversingÂ
User17 i love that weâre all depending on leo to get f1âs favourite couple back togetherÂ
Baby Fever Angst Series
(This wasnât due out until tomorrow but Iâve released it earlier in honour of THE MONACO WIN BABY!!!!!!) đ„łđŸđ„łđŸ
Tag list
@lav3nder-haze @minkyungseokie @callsignwidow @luvrrish @fall-bambi @evans-dejong @sadsierra2 @justdreamersdream @spookystitchery @dark-night-sky-99 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @elijahslover @luckyladycreator2 @bborra @mrosales16 @reguluscrystals @brsr @tvdtw4ever @alwaysclassyeagle @gigicisneros @spanishcorndogs @dullypully @thecubanator2 @goldenharrysworld @awritingtree @jxnellat @sbrn0905 @hc-dutch @mxdi0 @buckybarnessweetheart @ironmaiden1313 @dreamercrowd @yourbane @glow-ish
#baby fever angst#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc headcanon#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc x reader
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