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kitkatt0430 · 1 month ago

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In canon, of course, when Jason goes back to Gotham on his Lazarous Pit Fueled Rage Bender (TM), he sees Tim as Robin, a small kid in his old colors who probably doesn't fully understand the danger he's attracting from Batman's enemies or the exacting standards Bruce has that (like a lot of adults) he won't explain until you fail them (and maybe not even then) and...

And Jason doesn't see Tim for himself. Jason sees Tim as a stand in (replacement) for himself that Jason can project his feelings of failure and self hatred on to. I see a lot of the fandom having Jason apologize in part with a 'it wasn't about you and I shouldn't have made it about you, it was about Bruce' slant. And while that's great, love the much needed apologies and mending of their relationship in fanfic spaces but...

Jason does take his anger for Bruce out on Bruce. Jason takes his anger at himself out on Tim.

And while I wanna unpack that at some point, eventually... what if Jason saw Tim and instead of the pit rage kicking in to make Tim a dumping ground for his anger at himself... Jason saw Tim and saw a kid that needed to be saved. Saw himself, young and naive, thinking that Bruce was a hero who'd always be there for him and put him first. Trusting that Bruce would always believe Jason so long as he told the truth. Trusting his absent mother would love him when she came back into his life.

It's not a 'oh now that I've met Tim I realize my rage toward him is unreasonable' reaction (though I do enjoy those fics) but a 'never hated Tim in the first place, but is still seeing Tim as a stand in for himself' type thing.

Jason looks and sees what seems like a kid just like him standing where he used to and wants to do for that kid what he wished someone had done for him. So he... kidnaps Tim. With good intentions; he doesn't want to hurt Tim, but give Tim a soft place to land away from the dangers of being Robin. Tim wouldn't see it that way, but Jason starts the 'kidnapping to show his brotherly love' fanon thing early here.

Tim, of course, is super excited when he realizes his kidnapper, the Red Hood, is actually Jason somehow alive again. He connects the green eyes of glowy rage with the Lazarous Pit which at least explains why Jason is all angry-snappy about Bruce when Tim tries to get Jason to go home.

So Tim would start trying to figure out how to defuse the Bruce-related anger by explaining why he blackmailed his way into being Robin. And while Jason isn't in the right frame of mind to recognize he's being a bit unreasonable about being angry that Bruce didn't grieve for him in exactly the way Jason wants to have been grieved for - destructive rage towards the Joker instead of inwards self-hatred that Bruce was actually succumbing to - he does rightly recognize that Bruce needing to rely on a child to rein him back in was extremely harmful and unfair to Tim. Jason wants Tim to be angry about this, not understanding that Tim underwent very different kinds of abuse in his formative years.

Jason would get physically abused by Willis and while Catherine meant well, her dependency on her son as her caretaker while she got high was it's own kind of emotional abuse. It was anger that gave Jason the strength to protect himself and stand up for himself and others. Righteous anger can be a good thing, it can fuel the desire to change things for the better. But anger can also be exhausting and it's an emotion where it can make everything look like a nail to it's hammer. And I do like the idea that caught in the Pit Rage's influence, Jason would experience both kinds of anger in a heightened way. Smacking at Batman and Joker and Black Mask and lesser targets like nails to hammer. But also righteous anger and a desire to protect and help kids like him. Like Tim.

But Tim's reaction to the abusive levels of neglect his parents saddled him with has left Tim with a crippling need to be perfect while accepting that doing so will only achieve a minimum level of attention. He's attention starved and touch starved and expects his best - which is often better than others but how would he know that? - not to be good enough. What Jason identifies, rightly, as Bruce behaving badly towards a kid (at least in Tim's stories about his early days as Robin) is actually an improvement over his parents in Tim's eyes. Honestly, the better Tim is treated, the more confused he gets right now, so some of what Bruce has been up to more recently with him has probably left Tim utterly bewildered and making incorrect assumptions why Bruce is acting that way.

(Has Bruce identified the problem with Tim's parents and been genuinely making efforts to help Tim that Tim doesn't recognize because he's been taught that he's an imposition and Bruce isn't actually trained to identify the correct way to handle this kind of situation? Probably, but that's not what this idea is about.)

And so we have this battle of wills going on. Jason trying to keep Tim safe from harm and far away from his revenge plans. But constantly having to up the Robin proofing of where he's keeping Tim stashed because Tim keeps trying to summon Batman for a family reunion. The two of them having heart to hearts during the day, desperately trying to understand each other and get through the other's stubbornness.

I honestly don't know where this would wind up by the end, but the front half of the idea feels relatively solid.

Also Bruce is totally melting down over Tim being missing. Tim's parents probably haven't noticed yet. Alfred has probably been going out with his shotgun while no one is paying attention to him and trying to glean info on who took Tim in his own way. (His pseudo grandson is missing after the one before him died and Alfred doesn't at least make threats in an attempt to find out who took him? Nope, Alfred is being proactive about this. I can see this leading him to Red Hood and Jason just being relieved that Alfred, at least, isn't gonna judge him harshly for having guns as his weapons of choice.)

(Alfred - *threatening to shoot Red Hood for taking Tim*

Jason - So this means Alfred won't judge me for shooting bad guys, yes?)

#batman #red hood #fanfiction #fanfic ideas #jason todd #tim drake

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soloragoldsun · 9 months ago

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My overall opinion on Goro Akechi. Spoilers below.

I like him as a character and as a villain, but I will never ship him with Joker or be able to see him as being an equal member of the Phantom Thieves.

The dude literally put a gun to Joker's head and pulled the trigger with a huge fucking smile on his face. He also killed an officer just to clean up any loose ends. He then framed Joker's death as a suicide, all while acting like some paragon of justice. The only reason it didn't work was because HE was outsmarted by the Phantom Thieves. He had every intention of making Joker DEAD!

And even after that, I was ready to have a "Cool motive, still murder" moment later, but I honestly didn't even feel that. Here's the thing: Akechi could have easily used the Metaverse to get his revenge on Shido WITHOUT becoming a fucking serial killer. He could have axed the bastard off or even tormented him a bit first, but no. Because he was so determined to get noticed and to play a long game that stroked his ego, he made the CHOICE to play with his prey. He wasn't manipulated into killing. He chose. He was old enough to know "murder is bad." There's only so much him being a teenager can excuse, okay?

He killed Wakaba. He left Futaba without a mother and in a state to be manipulated by Shido's goons into believing that she was somehow the cause of her mother's death.

He orphaned Haru. Yeah, her father was a piece of shit, but his death on live TV still scarred her badly, and it should have been HER choice whether to kill him or let him live.

He caused a train derailment that could have killed dozens of people.

Even in Shido's Palace, there is no doubt in my mind that he would have killed Joker and the others without a second thought if he had won that fight. His "heroic sacrifice" only came after he was utterly defeated.

Here's the thing though: He's a damn good villain and foil to Joker. I enjoy his character immensely. His obsession with Joker and the connection they share definitely evokes other fictional relationships like Sherlock and Moriarty and Batman and the Joker. I just will never see any of these pairings as healthy romances or even friendships.

I also loved how much of an edgelord he was in Royal. There was no begging for forgiveness or sudden redemption. Nope. He was just being an unhinged, bloodthirsty nutjob because he actually COULD act that way now that his mask has been removed, and I kinda loved that.

So yeah. Those are my two-cents on Akechi. He's an enjoyable character and villain, but I have no intention of ever seeing or writing him as anything but just that: a villain.

#persona 5 #p5 royal #spoilers #goro akechi #shido #joker #akira kurusu #personal thoughts

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ajokeformur-ray · 8 months ago

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what did you think of the trailer lovely?!

Hey angels🥺

Okay so... I'm conflicted.

We all know I wasn't in favour of a second film because I thought Joker (2019) was the absolute perfect cult classic standalone film, and I still think that way. We all know I wasn't excited about the announcement of a sequel because I was upset about the Harley spin Todd AND Joaquin said they wouldn't do if they ever did a sequel.

But I also said I'd reserve full judgement until I saw a trailer, and now I'm saying, having seen the trailer, I'll reserve full judgement until I see the cinema release film.

My initial thoughts when I saw the trailer were all on Arthur and how PERFECT he is. He looks the same, he sounds the same, he FEELS the same (what I mean is, the general vibe of his segments in the trailer feel true to how Arthur feels in the first film). He IS Arthur, from what I can tell from the little we see of him. I am absolutely terrified that this sequel will undo all the nuance of the first film or make a mockery of it or that they'll turn our Arthur into yet another run of the mill abusive Joker or butcher his character and everything we love about him, but I felt comforted in the trailer to feel like I recognised the man looking back at me. It is so good to see this beautiful tragic mess of a man again. He's gotten older and so have we.❤️ Isn't it beautiful?🥺

The cinematography is GORGEOUS, the colours are astounding and Joker looks ethereal in the moonlight just like we all said he would, the music is intense but also whimsical and dreamy and very much Arthur, his laughter is so familiar yet so painful because we all know that THAT laugh is when he's being suppressed or hurt in some way, and my heart BROKE when I saw him being pushed around, dragged, CHAINED IN THE RAIN????? Let our man rest, PLEASE😭💔he's been through too much and I just can't see Arthur hurt anymore. Also, whoever did that lipstick smile on the glass deserves a raise. That was GORGEOUS.

So in short, I'm worried about the aforementioned character development (or assassination), I'm worried about the intentions with Harley; is she a delusion like Sophie was or is she using Joker to further her own agenda or is he gonna be abusive and hurt her or are they BOTH delusional and therein lies the tragedy somehow or is it a thousand other possibilities? There's just too many options and all we have is extrapolation and spectulation until the film comes out, and as I said I'll be reserving full judgement until I see it because I'm worried about what they're gonna do to Arthur but in short when I watched it all I was thinking was,

"please don't hurt him please don't hurt him please don't hurt him please don't -"

Just like I did during the first film, and that's extremely comforting in a very odd way😭

What did you all think?

@starry-eyedd

#joker 2019 #joker 2 #joker folie a deux

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dragonflight203 · 6 months ago

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Mass Effect 3 replay, Normandy part two:

-As others have mentioned, how did Liara get her equipment on Shepard’s ship?

She left Mars on the Normandy. Presumably her equipment was on Mars and out of reach. Possibly even destroyed by Cerberus.

-If you go paragon, Shepard compares not knowing what the Prothean device does to handling a loaded gun.

This is the same simile that can be used in the ME1 side quest with the Terra Firma party; the turians preventing humanity from turning on the dormant mass is similar to preventing a child from handling a loaded gun.

Intentional? Or small reference pool?

-It sure is convenient that the blueprints for the Crucible have survived countless cycles when so much other knowledge has been lost.

The one piece of knowledge that the Reapers should absolutely want destroyed has somehow managed to survive the Reapers wiping traces of previous cycles. Every cycle finds them and every cycle expands upon them.

Yes, I’m sure each cycle took strenuous measures to protect them but this goes beyond straining belief.

-How significantly does the dialogue with Liara change if you have not done Lair of the Shadow Broker? I’ll need to look that up.

-What does Liara mean that Cerberus tracked her down?

It’s repeatedly mentioned in ME2 that the Normandy has Cerberus bugs and tracking devices. Cerberus should have learned the Shadow Broker’s location as soon as the Normandy traveled there.

-Feron’s conveniently an agent for Liara now, so he’ll never directly appear in ME3.

Game’s loss. He would have made an excellent additional shipmate. Maybe even squad mate.

-According to Liara’s notes on the Broker Terminal, the Therum expedition was conducted by University of Serrice. That’s the same university Liara got her doctorate from.

So they were fine with Liara just abandoning the expedition after the volcano exploded…? Spectre privileges, I suppose.

And where was everyone else, for that matter? The only people on Therum were Liara and the geth.

-I love that Chakwas is a single woman with no complexes about it. That’s so rare in fiction.

-Adam’s reasons for not joining Shepard are valid. Shepard could have been a clone, Cerberus is evil, and you can’t just up and leave the Alliance.

-Adam’s acceptance of AI is established here. His issue with Edi was that she was a Cerberus AI, not that she was an AI. Once he realized Joker trusted her he warmed up.

He also apparently never informed authorities, which is pretty significant considering the Normandy was to be Anderson’s model command center.

-You have the option to tell Diana to focus on getting support or Cerberus.

Once again, Cerberus is taking center stage despite not being the main villain.

-The Hammerhead was so despised that Bioware killed it offscreen in M3.

It was sent to labs to have the armor improved; they were presumably destroyed when the Reapers attacked.

-Cortez’s interest in men is established here in your first conversation with him; you can learn he had a husband.

Kudos to Bioware for not burying it.

-The conversation with James is odd. It’s a rehash of the one you had on the Citadel

On the Citadel, you can speak to him after the meeting with the Council. He affirms that Shepard was right to leave Earth to gather support. He’ll stick with Shepard because he knows it’s the right thing to do even though he wants to be on Earth.

Then in this first conversation on the Normandy, he asks you how the Council meeting went. After the sparring match, you can ask him how he feels about leaving Earth.

It’s like the scenes were written separately and the writers didn’t realize they repeated until it was too late to change either of them.

-James chose the intel about the Collectors over saving the colony. Renegade.

-This also disproves the oft-repeated point in ME2 that the Alliance was doing nothing about the Collector attacks. James’s squad was there to protect the colony and were installing additional defenses (according to the wiki). Most of them die protecting the colony and James retrieves information about the Collectors.

Cerberus told Shepard the Alliance was doing nothing to get them onboard; the reality is the Alliance was making an effort.

Maybe if Cerberus had shared information with the Alliance, the Collectors could have been stopped sooner or the colonies could at least have been better protected. But that would have risked Cerberus not getting the Collector base, and that was TIM’s real agenda.

-I’ll give James a pass on not recounting the events of Paragon Lost for gamers who did not view it. That was probably one of the worst events of his life.

I will not, however, excuse Bioware for not providing a Codex entry on it.

-I wish I could go neutral with James. I don’t want to flirt with him or be cold. I’d be fine with ignoring it.

#mass effect #mass effect 3 #mass effect 3 replay

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d-amore · 1 month ago

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fake love, cupid and jealousy for the ask game ! any f/o u want to answer with !!

HIII thanks for the asks :333

warning i talked more than i originally planned LOL i have many many thoughts about nocturnal animals

💔 BTS - Fake Love: have they or you changed just for the other? how much harm did that cause on the relationship? how was that solved, if it was?

aough bruce became more open, maybe more trusting of those trying to help him..... lissa didn't change bc she's already perfect (jk i'm just not finished with her character)

BUT there's a big event and that is jason's murder. bc of that they both change, for the worst too. bruce goes back to being closed and distant, and slowly lissa becomes more and more quiet and scared, much to the point of abandoning viligantism. it caused a lot of harm, so much that they couldn't talk or even look into each other's eyes, until she leaves him one afternoon without a word. AND it WAS solved but only like 20 years in the future :P and they're back to being lovey dovey but now also old

💘 FIFTY FIFTY - Cupid: have either of you given up on love before? how did it feel to find love in one another? were either of you heartbroken before finding the other?

bruce had just lost one of the loves of his life (selina), while melissa was single for most of her life in gotham bc she had a troubled relationship before, so in a way, it's not like they truly gave up on finding love, they just... stopped bothering to find one

and it was... truly something, for her. falling in love with gotham's prince as you get to know him, but still so in the dark about his true self. yes he's handsome, yes he's hot, yes i want to have him to myself and i melt at him just calling my name, but is he trust-worthy? does he has good intentions? he has a child, does he impregnates women and leave them, not even bothering to help financially? so many questions. so little time with him

and for him it was so refreshing, but so scary too! falling in love again in such a short period of time, for someone that shared so many similarities with his past lover! what if she gets involved in his life and media makes her life living hell? what if someone goes after her (trying to hurt bruce, not batman). what if the joker somehow finds out she's related to batman as well, and uses her against him, like he did with selina? so many fears and such a desire to be with her

🔥 MONSTA X - Jealousy: who is the most jealous? how is that jealousy managed? when does it happen? is it easily triggered?

lissa is the most jealous ofc, she's dating the fucking prince of gotham! he has every girl (and boy too let's be honest) under his feet, waiting for a mistake of her to take her place. she gets so blind with jealousy when they're out and about in a gala, and so mad at herself for thinking this about bruce, that she usually asks to leave earlier

for the first months of relationship it was quite the trouble and reason for fights that, different from other couples (looking at you discostick and class duties), didn't end in bed but rather with her crying and storming off. it may have looked doomed, bc it didn't get better even with him reassuring her that he had eyes for no one else, but she swallowed her pride (oh no she's not letting bruce fucking wayne go) and made sure to let everyone know he's hers at every gala, and that was the only way she calmed herself from the jealousy

he feels jealousy too from time to time but it's not as intense as hers

#answered!#nocturnal animals 🌕

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fictionkinfessions · 4 months ago

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[《 Fandom this post is about : «“Persona ５”»｜«“Persona ５ ROYAL”» 》]

[CW : Mentions of death(?), locking people inside ____, potential depersonalization regarding __mi__ (name is a spoiler), maybe some other stuff but those are the major ones I believe?]

[WARNING : This post contains major, MAJOR spoilers for (if I recall correctly) the last parts of «“Persona ５ ROYAL”», please scroll if you haven't finished the game or plan on doing so!]

❂——✧——✧——✧——✧——✧——❂

♧ – « “Oh god, I just realized that my first post may somewhat imply (depending on how you look at it) that I actually took Maruki's deal oh crap” »

♤ – « “heyyy, guys.. I hope that's not what anyone thought, that was just me remembering stuff and being sad because we all went our separate ways and also because someone I really cared about was freaking 💀 😞” »

◇ – « “That being said, it would have been horrifying to be in such a reality. Especially because the whole ‘solution’ was just: ‘oh, you're sad? Bingo!!! NOT ANYMORE!!!!!!!’, and it didn't really get rid of the root problem.” »

々– « “It felt more of a childish solution to (almost) every problem there could have been. Simply being “happy” all of the time..” »

♡ – « “Not to mention, Sumire wouldn't have even gotten her sister back, she would just have stayed as Kasumi forever, but you know what's somehow WORSE?” »

❅ – « “That it would have been just an idealized version of Kasumi. 😕” »

✪– « “It didn't really feel like he was that same trustworthy therapist I kept going to whenever I felt sad, or whenever I just wanted someone to talk to for all of those months.” »

☆ – « “Which is sad.” »

❀ – « “It's always been sad, seeing how people you have grown to like, or even those you didn't, show their true colors like that.” »

✸ – « “He didn't have bad intentions, of course, but that doesn't remove what he was doing. Good intentions don't remove the wrong actions someone can take to fulfill something.” »

❆ – « “That's why he had a palace, no?” »

✧ – « “But.. even with that being said.. even despite everything that happened.. I feel as though, somehow, I still can't say that I hate him with complete confidence that it's true. I just.. don't know what to feel or think about him. I didn't want my friends to be caged in such a reality, but if they were all going to have the very things they longed for.. was breaking that bubble really the right thing to do? No, of course it was, but sometimes it feels like I did something wrong by not accepting that deal, as terrible it would have been.” »

❂ – « “So if any Maruki is reading this.. please get a therapist for yourself and refrain from giving anyone therapy until you no longer feel like running away from problems or traumatic stuff is somehow better than accepting that they happened. Seriously.” »

✮ – « “Have a nice day, doctor, but please don't try to come near any of my friends or even acquaintances until then. That's the least you could do after that.” »

❂——✧——✧——✧——✧——✧——❂

[ Side notes : ]

— #❂🥞🐈‍⬛✮

(《✮ «“Ren Amamiya”» ✮｜❂ «Akira Kurusu» ❂｜♧ «“Joker”» ♤ fictive + fictionkin》)

(How I managed to forget to put the custom tag in post number 6 I will never know.. side effects from using symbols and decorations on excess 😞)

(I should start making more shout outs to certain people in the side notes actually..)

(shout out to Yusuke and Ann!!)

(FINALLY FINISHED DECORATING EVERYTHING, WAR IS OVER 😭😭 I know I said I liked doing this, but sometimes I just wanna share little silly stuff that happens to me.. and then I find myself suffering because I just so happened to believe that decorations on the last few posts I made was the GREATEST idea ever 😞 this is why I forgot to put the custom tag I swear to god 💔)

[ Post number : ７ ]

(slowly becoming a regular here..)

#fictionkinfessions #fictionkin #❂🥞🐈‍⬛✮#renamamiyakin #persona5royalkin #renamamiyafictive #persona5royalfictive #text strain cw #mod party cat #caps cw #death cw #prisons cw #depersonalization cw #mental health issue #medical abuse cw

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gabenvrhappened · 8 months ago

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TvShowsOr... WeCrashed

One scene in, and I was sold. The scene was of Anne Hathaway's character getting a guy fired because he was having a meeting in her office, while him and everyone else at that gathering was wearing shoes right on top of a white carpet. What seemed like a hilarious scene of a terrible boss with a terrible accent turned into something much bigger. I was sold on a wrong idea, but that's kind of genius when you realize what WeCrashed is about. Nothing more than just a show about an entrepreneur who really only cares about being rich. It doesn't matter how, or with what idea he gets that, as long as he get the money on his pocket. Capitalism at its best, am I right?

Just like Christian Bale's role in American Psycho, I thought: maybe I could take some notes. This miniseries (based on real facts) tells the story of Adam Neumann, the eccentric founder of WeWork, a co-sharing workspace, that lost his company because he cared more about living the good life than living the real responsability of being in charge of a billionare company. It kind of reminded me of Inventing Anna, from Netflix: small people who tell big lies to huge people who somehow believe in them. Rich people, go figure.

No use in sugarcoating it: just like Inventing Anna, WeCrashed made me want so much to be a sociopath who doesn't care about deceiving people because that's just a small price to pay compared to the opportunity to have all of your dreams becoming true. No mater what and who cares how. Honestly, being a good person is really getting me nowhere, but that's all I know how to be — believe me, I tried being the fucker and it's too much effort.

Coming back to the reason why I decided to give a chance to this: Anne's character (plus the fact that it was a show that wouldn't need a second season and, therefore, wouldn't be cancelled half-way trough it). She is the wife of the founder, and she was a real person years ago, but it feels like she could be someone created in these last two years because she believes in manifestation and all that shit (don't get me wrong, I believe in that shit real hard). Maybe if Adam wasn't too busy paying attention only to himself, he could have seen that all this esoteric talk would be the big deal in the future, and maybe that could've been capitalized early on. You see? I rooted for them, even knowing that they are still rich and so much better than me. But it's impossible not to agree that Adam was toxic in all his leadership and Rebekah was insane in all her good intentions.

The show, just for all that, is incredible, and the story itself borders on the absurd way too many times, that you just can't stop wondering what's coming next and what will be necessary for someone to put an ending in all this madness. However, nothing caught my eyes more than Jared Leto. He was Adam throughout the whole thing. The characterization was insane. I forgot that I was seeing the lead singer of 30 Seconds to Mars on the TV screen. I forgot he once was the Joker. It's amazing how much of a chameleon he is. Insane. It's true that Anne has all the emotional weight on her, that she handles beautifully, but even so it's no match for the fire Leto brings.

Unfortunately, I came to realize (and, arduously, accept) that there are things that you just can't be in life. I can watch as many shows as I want, but nothing will ever teach me how to really be like Adam (or Anna). I can draw inspiration, change something here or there, but nothing can make me create the aura they have. The aura that believes in their own craziness and that will make everyone around them believe too. It's just as mesmerizing to watch this inspiring fire as it's fun to search for what really happened and seeing that it's not just television exaggeration. I caught myself doing that a lot during the episodes. Going through the articles to the Reddit picture that made Neumann finally step down as the CEO of WeWork.

Ultimately, I have to admit, I was worried about how he would end up. Look at that! Me! Worried about a billionaire (other than Taylor Swift). It would be more convincing to be worried about Rebekah's failure at being an actor (even with the power of nepotism right in her hand) since I am one too, than to be worried if Adam made it alive after all (and of course he did it). Guess his charisma really worked on me, even if through Jared Leto who has the incomparable beauty as an ally. A unicorn effect, indeed.

#TvShowsOrGabeNeverHappened

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sillyfudgemonkeys · 11 months ago

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Ok there hasn't been much aside from a magazine shot and some kinda confirmation, what are your thoughts on the protagonist of metaphor, 1 having their own backstory, and 2, apparently not being a fully silent protagonist? I ask bc I know some similar points come up with the p5 protagonist and eheheh I can guess how ya feel about that

Well I mean.......I'm fine with P2, P3, and Catherine, and those all fulfill either one or both criteria. TT0TT

P2 has a firm backstory for chars, and they speak/technically speak at some point.

P3 they have a firm backstory that plays into the main plot later (P3/4MCs have the more varied personality tho).

And Vincent.....alksfjdkjff Vincent is self explanatory, but one of the best examples of a voiced MC who's personality can greatly differ from the sliding law/chaos scale as make certain choices.

Hell, Serph from DDS1, I thought he could totally be voiced during those dialogue choice scenes. Was kinda let down they didn't even though I found the opportunity to be right there!

So like I don't mind a silent MC, I don't mind a silent MC with a backstory, I don't mind a silent MC with a vague/small backstory, I don't mind a voice MC, I don't mind a voiced MC with a backstory, I don't mind a voiced MC with a vauge/small backstory.

As long as they handle it well I'm good.

(now for the P5 rant uwu, oh you know it was coming)

My issue with P5 is......contradictions. I'm really suppose to believe that the boy who saved a woman he didn't know, would try to creep on (at best) a sex worker/maid? (at worst the undertones of possible sexual assault esp with two other guys hiding in the same room really......makes my skin crawl, I know that's not their intention, but god could you imagine being Sadayo for a minute???? it's already bad enough it's her STUDENT! And now she has to figure out if it's intentional or not, but if she knew about the two hiding???? I'd freak).

I'm supposed to believe he is cool with creeping on his female friends (it's not about being horny, it's the fact they don't keep it to themselves it really isn't that hard)? He'd stand bye and allow Ryu to creep on them and make pervy plans that involved the girls? That'd he'd say he's "so jealous" when he sees a fake Anne on Kamo's arm?

It just doesn't add up. It's either "we put it in there for shits and giggles but yeah it doesn't make sense for his char," OR worse yet.....they do coexist and Joker is actually a piece of shit with a fucked moral compass. (which the latter COULD BE interesting, but it's never explored so :'D can't really argue it being a good writing choice).

Like shit, let's ignore his established character moment and backstory and focus on Anne/Ryuji. What bothered me was......these two are his ride or die. They had his back and he had their back. Ryu tried to protect him with his life after just meeting him. Anne put her trust in him, and pushed him to become Joker. Like if Ryu is the reason formed the group PT. Anne's the reason Joker pursued being a PT in the first place (she gave him the push he needed).

....yet the game gives you a biiiit too many opportunities to shit on them???? Sometimes it's not even optional! Like the dialogue choices are all somehow negative towards them at times and it's like???? Why???? I can maybe get Yusuke, but then he joins! But nooooo no 100% negative option for Makoto, even tho she drives off one of your leads! (tbh I think that's the starting point the game even calms down on Anne/Ryuji choices too). But really??? Why am I fine leaving Ryu alone with two harassers??? Why do I treat them like this? If there are two chars that the MC should go to bat for regardless, it should be Anne/Ryuji.

Just....why? Why? Can't I have a choice where I 100% agree with them? I don't care if they are in the wrong, I don't care if they thing 2+2=7. Let me talk them up!

It's like the opposite of the Junpei/P3MCs issue. I can't buy a friendship between Junepei and P3MC because I don't see them develop as friends in the main story (and I don't get even a side story/SL with him). I have a hard time stomaching parts of Junpei/FeMC friendship (but reverse), because even I can easily see them as friends, he still acts all pissy! And you'd think that'd damage their relationship.

Now replace Junpei with P5MC, and P3MCs with Anne/Ryuji/*insert other char* and I have the same issue. It's not about "I don't want people kissing MCs asses all the time" it's not about kissing ass, it's about making sure they feel like they are actually friends when the game tells me they are. TT0TT

Between that and.....P5MC.....feeling like they WANTED to write a more concrete MC BUT felt compelled to make him silent.....I think hurts his writing more.

One benefit for the P3/4MCs is the diversity in personalities it created with the different choices (of course you can easily make contradictions, but those contradictions are PLAYER BASED rather than STORY/GAME BASED like P5). Esp between the good endings vs the bad endings.

I can buy P3MCs choosing ignorance and killing Ryoji, because of the meaning of SLs, ignoring them, or doing them and being absolutely HORRIBLE and reversing/breaking them (male side). FeMC it's more ignoring them and her just smiling hollowly.

P4MC I can see giving into the bad ending or even the accomplice ending for the most part. Esp if they choose to ignore SLs, be an ass/loner when possible, and be as unhelpful in the investigation as possible as well. Considering he still hangs out with his friends outside SLs, him still being horrified by what he's done and not 100% evil in the accomplice ending still makes sense. (needs some tweaking but still makes sense)

But P5MC? Giving into Yaldy? I dunno. I can kinda see it, he does insult his friends at times (reason why? who knows! is he jaded because of his arrest? Maybe? But his friends are also outcasts too??? At least with P3/4MCs it can be played off as loners right out the gate who get wrapped up in shenanigans. P5MC? he's deliberately giving motivation by his first friends and his strong sense of justice so????? doesn't that contradict????). The only thing that seems to foreshadow this ending decently is him saying some greedy and outta pocket/"sinful" things.....at times. Like I've said before, it's contradictory. Wishy washy!

At least with P3/4MCs, the fun times they experience could be explained by they are faking it (either emulating emotions for P3MCs and are still hollow inside/fear death, or hiding their true intentions for P4MC aka for the accomplice ending). Hell! P4 even puts the idea in the players head by Shadow Yosuke that Yosuke is only looking into this case cause it's "fun" and "to play hero" and maybe P4MC is doing just that (in P4G at least). Otherwise the "fail" ending for P4MC doesn't really have any personality contradictions, you just fail to see the truth and/or convince the others.

P5/P5MC relies on a moral choice of the MC (chosen by the player). But the MC himself has a lot of set personality traits and said choice contradicts the majority/prominent/establishing traits (compared to the minor ones that align with that choice but contradict the establishing traits). It just feels....weird.....

Like it's not allowed to breathe. Joker isn't open-ended enough like P3/4MCs to rationalize the bad ending. But he's also not concrete enough to stay consistent and just stick with set ending.

If P5MC was written more like the approach they took to Vincent, that might've helped it.

Cause Vincent (looking at just Catherine Classic for this btw, but I think it also applies to FB just a few more hoops) can be Loyal/Neutral/Cheater without too much contradictions.

He's already shaky on his stance, and is unsure of himself (maybe a bit flighty and changes his opinion on things)

He is thrusted into a situation he had no control over (he does start off as loyal leaning so it's most likely a situation he wouldn't have ever found himself in if he wasn't targeted)

That incident causes him to change via reevaluating his outlook on life. From his choices in dialogue, to the questions in the confession. Those small choices affect his psyche and causes him to constantly change

With each change to his psyche, we see a new rationalization pop into his head.

Every ending rationalizes each thing, even the ones that contradict (aka the bad endings).

Yes it's the players choice, but 99% of the options feel within reason. And not just within reason, they are rationalized.

Basically what I'm saying is P5 needs to rationalize it. Either by making P5MC MORE openended like P3/4MCs....or make him more into a fixed character like Vincent but give different rationalizations as you make choices.

Back to Refan, as long as it handles itself well and isn't wishy washy or contradictory, I'm fine with however they wanna handle the MC. Silent or not. TT0TT

#silly asks #silly answers #sorry if the vincent part is a bit messy i'm tired and was trying to type fast

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pseudo-hero · 2 years ago

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Comics!Clex Plot Connection?

*Warning: BIG, l o n g post below. But it’s (probably) worth the read. Also, lots of spoilers I guess. My conclusion is near the end, but this is all relevant. Feel free to disagree, preferably with evidence.

So I noticed this probably months back, I think before I even read these issues. It was one of the many things that stuck out to me within them. For those who don’t know: Lex Luthor, the one and only, has now stolen the swag of not just Superman but Batman as well, at different points. There’s something that I feel few else, if any, have taken note of though:

(Above image from Justice League [2011], Issue #52)

“No need to thank us, officer,” Lex said while placing a hand on an amused Clark’s shoulder.

(Above images from Superman [2016], Issue #33)

“The last time it was to show off his fancy upgraded chest shield.”

So here you see in these few scans alone that beyond just enjoying the limelight and adoration that “being Superman” got him; Lex, deep down wanted the original Superman (whose name is—and no offense to any fan of her—most likely censored out in the above comic with Lex’s sister’s: Lena) to be proud of him. He wanted to be, on some level, close to Superman.

So how does Lex react when he seemingly fails to gain Superman’s faith, support and kinship?

(Above images from Superman [2016], Issue #36)

Eeek! Not well. He basically symbolically broke Superman’s heart (the S-shield) after they both, in a sense, betrayed each other’s trust. Although at least it couldn’t and didn’t get any worse than that, right?

Oh, wait...

(Above image from Lex Luthor: Year of the Villain [2019], Single Issue)

...it did get worse.

Much, much worse. (Although I wouldn’t blame anyone for thinking Lionel “Child Beater” Luthor deserved that).

Was Lex even close to mentally stable during this time? Evidence points to no.

But this was the situation for main universe (MU)-Lex. What about other ones?

Don’t let his skin hue fool you, this somehow is an alternate version of Superman with martian ancestry as well as kryptonian. There’s that familiar S-shield over his chest. (Or heart, if you prefer. I could honestly analyze and find Superman/Lex Luthor same-sex romance subtext in this one-shot alone for ages.)

They’re also a confirmed (by the creator) romantic couple! This proves that MU-Superman and Lex Luthor are most likely bisexual!

Also here’s more evidence (for those who want/need it) that this is an alternate version of Superman, which MU-Lex definitely was aware of: There’s a Kelex above that’s modeled to look more like MU-Superman. It’s probably similar to the disguise that Supermartian wears to work, wherever that may be. You can also see that this Earth’s Lex Luthor is that world’s Batman, somehow...

“My partner”. Need I say more? MU-Lex didn’t seem to like this—witnessing another version of himself happy and in-love/married to his Earth’s Superman when MU-Lex couldn’t pull his own (to be fair, MU-Superman is taken...)— which led to him attacking Supermartian by sending a Doomsday-version of himself after him and Supermartian then ends up getting punched/stabbed in the chest (possibly even heart) by the beast. *Sigh*

All that being said, the point I really wanted to make is that all these comics (and specifically Lex’s hidden desires within them) appear to eventually connect to these here Batman issues when it comes to Lex’s intentions. Like a continuation of sorts to Lex’s story from the previous comic arc:

(Above image from Batman [2016], Issue #119)

*Gasp* Lex admits that he thinks the world needs a Superman as well as a Batman? No way. But it can’t just be that can it? As Batman notes within the pages of the above issue, there’s always more to Lex’s words. But was Lex fully aware of what he wanted? He’s mocking Bruce here for losing all his funds to Joker, but I think deep down Lex here is...relieved. Maybe even hopeful. More than any other feeling I bet. But about what?

(Side Note: That’s an oddly romantic-looking dinner Lex set out for himself and Bruce. Then again, business-related dinners are traditionally well-put together, I suppose. He probably wasn’t coming on to the Batman though, that’s for sure.)

“The world needs a Batman...but does it have to be you...”

“And it is my Batman Inc....”

(Above images from Batman [2016], Issue #120)

Hehehe what is Lex trying to accomplish here! Why does he seem so adamant that someone be Batman and that he be connected to/have some control over Batman and co, even if it’s not (and hopefully not, is what he’s likely thinking) Bruce behind the cowl? Especially when we’re so used to seeing him be against the idea of superheroes?

Do you think maybe Lex (and the writer(s)) actually remembers the Perpetua debacle and all that came with it? Do you think he remembers those universes he visited which had alternate versions of himself, especially the one where he was inexplicably Batman and romantically paired with that Earth’s Superman? I think he does. Sure, he probably had multiple reasons for this since he’s that type of guy...but I bet somewhere at the bottom of his consciousness/top of his subconscious, he had this memory in mind and considered it in his plotting.

(Above image from Batman [2016], Issue #121)

Wow, does he look ticked off!

(Side Note: I really like the gold-colored accent on his bat-armor. It even looks like it has golden knuckles!)

(Above image from Batman [2016], Issue #121)

I think Lex isn’t gonna give up until he is in some way—actually or symbolically—in a relationship with/in control of/the slayer of Superman. I mean, of course he’s not! He’s Lex Luthor! But awww, isn’t it so cute yet sad that he still has hope as recently as these Batman issues from 2022? He’s probably one of the few beings in the multiverse who could rival Superman on having hope (probably because it’s mostly arrogance in his case). It’s also a shame for him that his plan here didn’t work, much to his chagrin. But hey, it’s not like Lex doesn’t have evidence in memory that Superman’s capable of being attracted to men such as himself and that they both could have been ‘a thing’ if Lex had perhaps hero’ed up sooner! So his attempts to get ‘closer’ to Superman were (and any future attempt he might make will be) sorta logical, at least!

Bonus!:

(Above images from Superman: Son of Kal-El [2021], Annual)

Clark: “I got so many things wrong with Lex.”

Lex: “Your father and I got off on completely the wrong foot.”

Translation for Both: “I misunderstood him and what he really wanted, and it harmed our relationship.”

Lex: “I hated him. But it’s possible I could have used him ... ”

Translation: “He took up way too much space in my mind and it drove me to the brink of multiverse-ending insanity. Now I realize that it was all because we could’ve had something special together, but it just didn’t happen.”

Awww. 💔

#Clex #Clark Kent #Lex Luthor #Superman #Superman Comics

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olivia-anderson-fanfic · 3 years ago

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Canary, Part 1

It was a good day. Why did stuff always have to go wrong on ‘good days’, Marinette thought bitterly as she rushed through the city, the rough edges of her phone digging into her palm. The message she’d been sent was burned into her eyelids.

She pushed the spiraling thoughts from her mind as she stared at the street sign nearest her. Only a minute and she’d be there and her fears would be either confirmed or denied.

She leaned against the wall to gather her thoughts. If she had messed up it had to have been today because, otherwise, he would have done something earlier. Did she mess up? She allowed her eyes to flutter closed as she thought back.

She’d woken up on an uncomfortable mattress on the floor and rolled off of it, the sheets sticking to her sweaty skin. It had been a particularly hot day for Gotham and she had been too concentrated on typing up a report for work to turn up the AC before her impromptu nap (translation: she’d passed out).

She rubbed her eyes until she managed to get her brown contacts out and set them in the weird not-quite-water that she had never bothered to learn the name for so her eyes could rest while she took a quick shower and changed.

Then, she’d waited. She sat in the window, eyes barely poking over the sill as she watched the building across the street. She didn’t feel like moving for a long while but, alas, the meeting was supposed to be that day and she was running out of time for that thing with Calendar Man and… yeah. Unfortunately, Marinette had to be productive that day unless she wanted more enemies.

She saw movement and her face lit up. She might get everything done soon, at least, and then she could pass out for a hundred years like she oh-so-desperately wanted to.

She checked that her gloves were firmly in place, pulled on the plague doctor (gas) mask that had accidentally become her trademark, and toed on her boots.

Then, she made her way up to the alleyway next to the building she had been watching. She’d been lucky enough to have a job right next to one of her safe houses and she kinda wished that it would happen again. It was nice to not have to travel a half-hour or more just to listen in on one boring conversation.

She pulled out her knives and, after testing to make sure they were still strong enough to hold her weight, began picking her way up to the roof.

She set everything up for the thing with Calendar Man. It took approximately five seconds. Yay her.

Alright, next thing: listening in on a boring conversation that, if she was lucky, would end in someone getting shot so it wouldn’t last too long. It was going to be even hotter inside the vent and she did not want to end up cooked. That would be embarrassing.

She crawled into the vents and dutifully wrote down everything they said on a notepad. They were negotiating a drug deal and her client wanted to intercept it to try and get both the money and the (… Big D? What the fuck is Big D?) drugs. From the sounds of it, it wasn’t possible but, hey, her job wasn’t anything more than gathering intel. If her clients wanted to die stupidly that was on them.

… maybe she’d kill her client herself, she thought angrily as she readjusted in the vent in hopes of not getting stuck to the metal. It was easy money but wow was it awful.

Or, at least, it was awful until a hand grabbed her by the hood of her leather jacket and started dragging her out. She tipped her head back, grin on her face in seconds.

“Signal. Hi.”

He sighed and pulled her the rest of the way out. She let herself hang from his grip like a reprimanded cat.

“So, what’s up?” She asked brightly, as if hadn’t just caught her listening in on a private conversation.

“Great, thanks for asking,” he said. “Even better now that I’m taking the famed Canary to Arkham.”

“We both know that’s not going to happen.”

He leveled her with a cold look for a few more seconds before splitting into a grin. “Yeah. Probably not. Got a backup plan?”

“Of course.”

“Is it even worth trying?”

“Probably not. But who knows? You could get lucky.”

She waited for a minute as he mulled over the idea in his head before he sighed. “I gotta ask: what’s with the egg?”

She swatted at his hand until he let her down and then led him over to her science experiment. “Know how there’s that expression that says ‘it’s so hot out you could make eggs on the sidewalk’ or something?”

“Yeah…?”

“Well, the pavement physically can’t get hot enough to do that and also we’re up north so: aluminum foil to try and get the process to work a little better.”

He stared at her for a while before snickering. “Need a magnifying glass? We can ‘kid with an anthill’ this.”

“Sure.”

He reached into his tool belt and started looking for his spare. Unfortunately for him, it seemed to be gone.

She could feel his sharp gaze turn on her even if she couldn’t see his eyes behind his helmet. He wasn’t stupid and magnifying glasses don’t usually just disappear into thin air unless they’re Plastic Man in disguise. She held up her hands for a quick search but, when he couldn’t find it on her, he just sighed and looked down at the science experiment. It didn’t seem to be going well. The egg was still distinctly not cooked.

Eventually, he groaned and sat down. The light around him flickered and started to move at his will. Marinette watched intently.

Ten minutes later, they had a cooked egg. They high-fived, delighted. They weren’t going to taste it, obviously, it had been out for a while without supervision and who knows what could have happened to it… but it was an egg! Yay them!

“My old science teacher would be so proud of me,” Marinette joked.

“My current science teacher would be proud of me.”

“Oooooh, going back to school?”

He smiled. “Yep! Robin is finally in college and Red Hood convinced me to go with him. You should, too, it’s actually not that bad.”

“Please. If I was going to do that I’d go back to my home country. American school is expensive and not all of us are sponsored by billionaires.”

“... aren’t you a millionaire?”

She grinned. “Of course. But why would I want to spend that much of my own money?”

He hummed his understanding. Then, she pushed herself up with a groan. “Right, we both have jobs. See you later.”

He hesitated and then held a hand out for her notepad. “Is it bad?”

She held it out of reach with ease. “Nah, just drugs. Unless someone got shot while I was gone but I doubt it. They’d been almost as bored as me last I heard.”

“If it’s nothing then let me see.”

“Ugh, do you really want to fight? It’s too hot for that,” Marinette complained. He started to square up and she, after a second’s thought, added a little something to convince him: “Also, there’s going to be a breakout today so you should really save your energy.”

“... really think I’m going to fall for that?”

There was an explosion in the distance.

“Yeah. I’d hurry. I’m pretty sure it’s Joker’s turn to get out.”

She waved him off with a smile… only for her smile to drop when she remembered her other job. She groaned again and stretched out while she still could.

Tikki floated over the side of the building, a magnifying glass as big as her head in her tiny paws.

Marinette rubbed the kwami’s head. “You’re the best.”

Her kwami sighed. “That I am,” she said.

Marinette grinned and sent the film of Signal using his powers to her computer so she could give it to Calendar Man when it was due.

People were always so predictable in Gotham.

She supposed she really had been tempting fate when she’d thought that. Still, that didn’t mean she liked it that Fate had called her bluff.

But, actually, it seemed that Fate was the one that was bluffing. That had been her entire day. She had finished up her work and then went to one of her more stocked safehouses for a nap. She’d woken up to the buzzing of her phone when she’d gotten the message. She didn’t think she had messed up anywhere…

Her shoulders relaxed. She was probably fine. Which meant it was just Oswald Cobblepot being annoying. As usual.

Marinette flung the doors to the Iceberg Lounge open. Every eye in the room fell on her, but she only cared about the eyes of one person.

She stalked through the lounge, pulling one of her twin karambits from its sheath and pointing the curved blade towards him.

“What the fuck do you want? You really think that, after almost seven whole years of rejecting your wrinkly ass, I’m suddenly going to say ‘oh, yeah, I guess I’ll work for him now’? Leave me alone!”

Cobblepot wasn’t concerned even as her knife came to rest under his chin.

“Canary,” he greeted, regarding her cooly through his monocle.

Guards surrounded them. Marinette somehow managed to look unimpressed without anyone being able to see her face.

Everyone present held their breath… except for the two with weapons pointed at themselves. They knew that they would never follow through with it, especially not in a place as public as this. It was little more than a warning, a reminder, that either of them could kill each other at any given moment and chose not to.

For now, at least.

Cobblepot dismissed the guards with a wave of a gloved hand and she, after a few seconds, lowered her knife.

“What do you want?”

“Currently? For you to get off my table,” said Cobblepot.

She snorted but hopped down with ease. “I meant: why did you call me here?”

“... we should go somewhere else to discuss this. I assume you don’t do all of your business meetings in public?”

“Only if I know ahead of time that I’m going to say no,” she said.

He motioned for her to walk with him to a private room and, reluctantly, she followed. He had to think he had something on her, otherwise he wouldn’t have tried calling her there. She was curious.

They came to a room with a metal door and she cringed a little. Fun.

She dropped eight knives down into a tray and Cobblepot put down a gun, a knife, and his umbrella. She let a female goon pat her down and then checked Cobblepot over herself. Nothing she could find, but she was sure he had found some way to hide one somewhere.

They stepped inside as a pair and each took a seat on opposing ends of the wooden table stationed awkwardly in the middle of the room. She leaned back in her chair and propped her feet up.

“So, what’s the job?”

“I’m surprised you’re even going to hear it.”

She shrugged. “I’m curious.”

He nodded slowly before leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table, steepling his fingers in front of his face.

“Power poses don’t actually work, you know, that’s just lies so companies don’t actually have to deal with all the discrimination.”

“Is that true?” He asked.

She shrugged again. “Probably. I’ve never worked for anyone, so…”

He chuckled. She didn’t like that.

But he didn’t say anything on that subject. Instead, he just smiled a smile that looked weird on his face and gave her her mission briefing: “I want you to figure out the bats’ identities for me.”

Marinette stared at him for a minute before breaking out into laughter. She couldn’t seem to stop. She stood up to leave, still giggling. Really? Did he really think that would work? People had asked many times, of course, and the bats’ identities weren’t common knowledge so she had to have said no. Why would she suddenly do it for him? She didn’t even like him.

She rested her hand on the knob but held off on leaving for just a second. She flashed a grin at Cobblepot. “Interesting offer. Bold. But no. Couldn’t pay me enough to do that.”

“Good thing I have no intentions of paying you, Marinette.”

~~~

And behold a new section I call ‘Marinette is a menace to society why would anyone let her on twitter’

(… the name may need a little work)

OliverQueenOfficial: Why does that one Gotham villain go by Canary? Black Canary already exists.

TheBetterCanary: if youre gonna vague tweet maybe dont put my name in it

TheBetterCanary: but anyways someone else named me that and it stuck before i could think of something to change it to

ScareCrane:… @/RiddleMeThis she’s dissing you

RiddleMeThis: LISTEN UP. IT WAS THEMATIC. DON’T ANY OF YOU KNOW ANYTHING OF DRAMA? EVER HEAR ABOUT CANARIES IN COAL MINES? FUCK ALL OF YOU AND YOUR UNCULTURED, UNEDUCATED ASSES. NOT TO MENTION IT WAS MAKING FUN OF THE BIRD THEME ALL THE VIGILANTES HER AGE SEEM TO HAVE. (1/14)

TheBetterCanary: @/ScareCrane why would you do that you knew he was going to do this

ScareCrane: Joker just broke out so Arkham is boring… needed to entertain myself somehow

TheBetterCanary: fuck you im not visiting this weekend

OliverQueenOfficial: Wow do I regret asking. I didn’t need all this family drama in my comments.

~~~~~

Perma taglist: @nathleigh @peachmuses

#alright strap in babes it's another longfic #no one is surprised #why do i change my format with every fic?#no clue #im dumb #anyways ive finally started writing this #canary #maribat #timari #timmari #timinette #shutterbug #marinette dupain cheng #ladybug #tim drake #red robin #i like timinette best as a ship name #idk why

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stephspurs · 3 years ago

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A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

BESTIES!! PART 10 IS A HOT ONE!! Enjoy reading it as much as I did while writing it (and re-reading it because its probs one of my fav parts of the whole series) Love Always, Steph xx

Part 10 | parte dieci

warnings; heavy-petting, almost-smut, and a hot jack grealish - read at your own risk ;) word count; 2469. writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter. next update; Monday 16/08 5pm AEST. Updates are three times/week (Monday, Wednesday & Friday)! tags (as requested by users); @footballffbarbiex @obsesseds-world @abysshaven link to fic masterlist here

Longing glances and shy smiles. That was how Amelia and Ben both spent the next morning at Cobham together, prior to travelling to Stamford Bridge for the fourth match of the season against Aston Villa. The two had spent the rest of the evening relaxing on the couch; no additional kisses were shared between them as they had both agreed to keep things friendly, and no matter how hard Ben tried, Amelia had no intentions of going any further just yet. She had admitted to him something that she had never uttered out loud before: she still needed to work out how to exist without Fede.

While their situationship had been as unconventional as it was, it was still something that Amelia had grown to live with and love. Fede’s personality was unlike no other she had come across, perhaps closest to that of Jack Grealish. Friendly, flirtatious, charming, to the point where she found herself blushing sometimes - not many people had been able to make her shy enough to blush, but Fede had, and now Jack was too.

hot boy grealish

mornin mils, can’t wait to see ya today.

I’ll be the hot one with the good hair and even better ass.

hot gal mils

morning my dear jacky, looking forward to seeing you too.

Is Tyrone not playing?

His bum has always been my fav bum to stare at.

hot boy grealish

cut it out, you.

Banter-filled texts had been a constant stream of entertainment throughout the days leading up to the match. Jack has been preparing Amelia for the possibility of her losing, constantly picking on the girl for being an overachiever and saying that she needs to be brought down a few pegs, having been quite some time since her team had lost a match. Amelia however, with enough self-confidence to rival that of the villa boy, wouldn’t even let him finish his sentences. Far too superstitious for that to happen.

The girl believed in superstitions, and she was not about to tempt her fate. She even went so far as to have her family name and a small Italian flag embroidered onto the inside of her collar of every polo shirt she would wear for match days. She did it at Juventus and organised for it to be done to her new Chelsea uniform. It was a personal choice, something that happened to run in her family also, her father and brother also having the White family name stitched to the inside of their kit. It was a way of keeping them all tied together, no matter what side of the pitch they were on. The Italian flag was there to remind her of all that the country had given her: her grandparents and a chance to be brilliant at what she loves most.

Arriving at Stamford Bridge off of the team bus, Jorgi had insisted she sitwith him and they spoke exclusively in Italian for the 30-odd minute drive from Cobham. Despite Amelia purchasing a new car a few days prior, Jorgi insisted they continue to carpool. It worked out well because now Amelia wouldn’t have to catch the team bus back to the training ground after the match. She had spent the better part of an hour out on the pitch with some of the boys, running through the plays she had in mind before she ushered them back into the changeroom, allowing the Aston Villa men to have their time out on the grass.

______________________________________________________________

“I would know that bum anywhere.”

“Hello Jack, nice to see you too. I’ve been well thanks, so has my bum. I’ll let my face know you said hello, too,” I spoke as I stood up from my crouched position, where I had been tying my laces.

“Just kiddin love, actually no I'm not - I love your bum. But I am happy to see your beautiful face too!” Jack spoke, as he pulled me into a hug - wrapping both of his arms around my head, effectively pushing me further into his chest.

“You saw my face a couple days ago when we were on FaceTime!”

“I saw your bum a few days ago on FaceTimetoo, doesn’t mean I'm not happy to see it!”

“So that's why you like helping me do my laundry, so you can see my backside as I reach into the machine!”

“Now I’m not a religious man, but I have prayed to God a few times that you drop a sock or two riiiiiiight in front of the camera.” He laughed back at my shocked expression.

“Jack! You are ridiculous! Stop being such a perv! No wonder you don’t have a girlfriend” I play-shouted at him as I smacked him with my rolled up matchday program.

“I’m holding out for you, my love.”

“Always the joker, Jack. Get out there and prepare for the worst match of your season.”

“Dream on Mils, we’ve got this in the bag.”

“Sure thing Jacky, sure thing.”

I walked further up the tunnel towards the changeroom, getting ready to deliver my strategy talk to the boys.

“Stop looking at my ass, Grealish!” I shouted without turning around. The boisterous laugh that followed my exclamation was enough to know that I was correct. I didn’t need to turn around to be able to predict what the laddish lad was already doing.

60 minutes of football later.

Amelia was correct in saying that Chelsea were going to win the match, her quiet confidence only getting louder and louder as each premier league match went on. She was apprehensive at first to see if her tactics were going to work in the Prem, or if there was to be some compromise on skill due to the fast-paced nature of the game. So far, however, the Chelsea men were quick learners and even quicker to execute.

One thing she wasn’t prepared for, however, was the absolute worldie that Jack had scored just before half-time at the Bridge. There was an element of familiarity in his goal, recognising the play as one of her own. A small smile crossed her face after he scored, running to celebrate with the away fans before jogging down past the bench and mouthing a quick “all you baby” at her as he moved back into position. She must have told him about it back when she was in Italy, knowing that there was no chance she would have exchanged her trade secrets to an enemy in the same league. It warmed her to know he paid enough attention to her to be able to practice that on his own with his team and execute it flawlessly in a live game.

What Amelia also wasn’t prepared for was for anyone else to recognise the play. Behind her on the bench sat an oddly-inquisitive Ben. He saw the tactic as it was playing out, recognising the run that Jack had to make to put himself in the box at the exact moment that John McGinn crossed the ball. Better yet, he saw Jack run down the sideline, nowhere near where he should have been, and mouth those words to Amelia. He wanted to know what was going on, was that why she wasn’t ready to commit to him?

Later that same evening.

After a hot shower, Amelia was curled up on the couch, ready to continue the docuseries she was watching the night before when she had an unexpected visitor pop round and confess his feelings to her. Thinking back on the night prior, she was happy that things ended up working out the way they did. Of course she wasn’t exactly thrilled with just how they happened but she could forgive the sweet boy. His intentions were pure and that's not something she was used to. It made her giddy to think about him, and about where things may go in the future.

A ring of her doorbell, almost to the exact hour that it had the night prior, made her get off her couch and walk down the small hall to the front door with a smirk on her face. Expecting to see the same brown-haired, blue-eyed boy that seemed to enjoy ringing her bell after hours. What she saw on the other side, however, was not what she was expecting.

“Jack, what on bloody God’s earth are you doing here?! You should be halfway back to Birmingham by now!”

“Are you gonna let me in love, it’s bloody cold out ‘ere tonight. Come on, shove over,” The slightly-less-than-6-foot-tall footballer commandeered her hallway, shutting the door behind him and locking it. This, coupled with his overnight duffle bag hanging off his shoulder let Amelia know that he had no other plans but to stay with her.

“Sure, Jack, I suppose you can come in and spend the night crashing in my spare room.”

“Now now, don’t pretend that you’re not happy to see me, love. And a spare room? I believe you promised me a cuddle.”

Rolling her eyes, she couldn’t help but smile at the charming young man. Feeling the blush start to spread from her chest up her neck and across her cheeks, she quickly turned and walked into her kitchen, calling out over her shoulder to ask if he wanted a cup of tea. Feeling a sense of deja vu from the night before, she shook her head and reminded herself that this is nothing like the night before. How could it have been - there was no kissing involved.

“Was that a blush I saw? Do I make you nervous, Amelia?” Somehow, Jack had moved to be right behind the girl at her kitchen counter. Hands on her hips, chest to her back, lips to her ear. Amelia felt herself freeze, and then relax into his hands.

“Jack, please, I don’t think we should do this.”

“Why not, Mils? You can feel it, too. The tension through the screen’s enough to force me into a cold shower most nights.”

And just like the night before, the whistle of the kettle was the only piercing sound resonating around the townhouse. Whilst all she saw was truth behind Ben’s eyes, Jack's eyes were clouded with lust and affection. Just once, she could give in, right?

Leaning her head back to rest on his right shoulder, he attached his lips to the left side of her neck. Hands rolling from the side of her hips, to underneath her shirt, feeling the small navel piercing between his fingers and smirking.

“Didn’t take you for being the kind of girl to have a piercing, Mils,” He spoke into her collarbone, a small nip to the sensitive skin as the girl continued to focus on her breathing.

“Piercings, Jack. I have more than one” She breathlessly spoke, knowing exactly what she was doing now. The admission of having more than one piercing that he could not see was all of the consent Jack needed to continue his exploration of her body.

“Are you going to let me see them, darling?”

“If you’re lucky.”

“I’d say I'm the luckiest guy in the world right now, especially in this position.”

She was unsure how it had happened, but Jack had pressed her further into the countertop. With her back still to his chest, his waist was at the perfect height to press into the small of her back. His leg had settled between both of her own and his hands had found the bottom of her bralette and were gently caressing her rib cage, desperate to get closer to where he presumed her other piercing was.

“We shouldn’t be doing this Jack,” she breathed out into the air, hot air escaping her lungs to resemble what she felt brewing in the pit of her stomach. Desire.

“Why the bloody hell not?” he mumbled into her sweet spot, where her jaw met her neck.

“Because I've been here before. This is bad.” With her eyes shut, he continued his way down her neck. The fabric of her top shifted so he could slide one of her straps down her arm.

“If it's bad, why does it feel so good? '' Whilst his lips got to work on her collarbone, and his hand was busy toying with the elastic line of her bralette, his other hand began to fiddle with her fingers. Entwining them with his own, the kind of strength she needed to feel to make her next decisions.

Pushing back off of the counter, meaning her ass had pushed right into the part of his body where he wanted her most, Amelia turned around and faced Jack. The two stood there, slightly panting, staring at each other. Amelia being the kind of girl that she is, decided that she wanted to have a little slice of the dominance pie. Maintaining eye contact, she lifted the bottom of her t-shirt over her head and dropped in on the floor, that second piercing now very clearly visible through the sheer fabric of her bralette.

“Come on Jack, aren’t you an athlete? What’s got you so out of breath? I thought you’d be able to last a little longer than some heavy petting.” She taunted at the smirking man, wanting nothing more than to mess up his hair as he nestled himself between her thighs. That's exactly the position that they found themselves in not more than 5 minutes later, this time upstairs in her bedroom.

Throughout the multiple rounds of passion that the two so-called friends shared that night, not once had their lips touched. Of course, her lips had touched parts of him and he had definitely been all over a completely different set of lips a few times (and from a few different positions), but face to face, eye to eye, nose to nose - their lips had never met. That told Amelia enough to set her anxiety on fire. Had she just gotten involved with a carbon-copy of the man she left behind in Italy?

The regret seeped through her bones and settled into her heart by the time that the Villa boy had fallen asleep next to her. What had she done? This was not the girl Amelia wanted to be anymore. She was done being the girl that was loved only when the lights went out. She wanted love under the sun, she wanted breakfast by the river, double dates, family parties. She wanted the kind of love that you could never try and hide even if you wanted to. She knew that this wasn’t what Jack was able to offer her. She was grateful for their friendship, she truly was, he made her laugh more than most people but for the first time in a very long time, she was certain that that's all she wanted from him.

Part 11. | parte undicesima

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spencersawkward · 3 years ago

Text

switchblade faith//spencer reid - chapter 9

summary: one month after joining the BAU, Clea is still settling in. between solving murders and getting acclimated to DC, the only comfortable thing in her life is her new friendship with Dr. Spencer Reid. (Baby Spence)

pairing: Fem!OC x Spencer

word count: 4.1k

content warnings: tattooing/tattoo aftercare, mostly fluffy!

A/N: hi! it's been a while since i updated this series, but i love it too much to leave it behind and i'm also always going to be obsessed with sub!spence. anyway, all my tattoos are stick and pokes atm so if some of the tattoo stuff if a little off, i'm sorry!

masterlist

it's really a matter of principle that keeps me bound to the promise. if I were a weaker woman, I would back down from the chair, would have shaken my head and told JJ that no, actually, I will not be getting something permanently inked on my body purely for the fulfillment of a bet.

but with most of the team around me and a couple flutes of champagne flowing through my veins, I give in. it's going to be small, even though I'm not going to see it until it's done. Penelope and Morgan being in charge of the design scares me, though. I start to get nervous that I'm going to end up with a unicorn tramp stamp.

"where are you gonna get it?" Garcia nudges my shoulder once we get inside the tattoo parlor. her eyes are traveling over all the intense artwork, which I can already tell is very much not her style. the walls are covered in intricate prints from past customers.

I think to myself for a moment. if I'm being completely honest, there's one place I've been meaning to get a tattoo, but never have. it's easy to hide, which is good. as long as the design they choose isn't horrifically embarrassing, I'll do it.

"I'm thinking..." I pull the waistband of my jeans down a little until it's right below my hip bone. "there."

"sexy." she says suggestively. I laugh.

"depending on what you guys have decided to give me, yeah." I angle for a hint, but Penny isn't caving.

"are you ready?" Morgan asks, having returned from the front desk area, where he's been talking to the artist. I take a deep breath, peer around at the rest of the team. we look like an odd bunch in here, an assortment of ages all gathered in a dark tattoo parlor.

Spencer's watching me with a concerned expression and I realize that I've been staring around for a decent amount of time. he doesn't say anything, although I've noticed that he's got a certain face he makes right before he does-- and he's making it.

"Clea, are you sure you wanna do this? you don't have to." JJ touches my shoulder suddenly. I realize that they think I'm genuinely worried and I let out a laugh.

"yeah, I'm fine," I turn to Morgan. "lead the way, handsome."

the tattoo artist has me lie down while he preps all his tools, snaps on his gloves. everyone sees me on my stomach and Emily gasps.

"are you getting a tramp stamp?"

"what? no," I giggle. "I'm gonna get it here." I show them the spot I just showed Penelope, and Spencer raises his eyebrows. Prentiss whispers something in Morgan's ear and the suave agent smirks.

"you're gonna like this." Penny grins. I glance at the tattoo artist to see how he reacts to that statement, but he's got a good poker face, unfortunately.

"are you being serious or are am I gonna hate all of you?" I ask.

"maybe a bit of both?" Spencer says in a slightly higher pitch, looking pleased to be in on the joke. I stare at him in disbelief.

"he knows what I'm getting, too?" I point disdainfully. Morgan laughs at the attitude.

"I told him on the way here."

I shake my head slowly and turn my attention to the boy genius, who is hiding a proud smile. there's a boyish quality to it that makes me feel a little better. I have to pull the side of my pants down as I turn on my side for the artist, and a peek of my black underwear makes Prentiss let out a whistling noise. my cheeks turn pink.

"shut up."

"are you ready?" the tattoo guy asks me. it's only then that I notice we're close to actually getting this done. I have no idea what's going on my body-- but there's no time like the present, right?

"sure."

it's the buzzing of the machine when he finally touches the needle to my skin that surprises me more than the pain itself. I feel myself resist the urge to move away, but I'm still enough for him to keep working.

"how's it feel?" Emily asks.

"like getting a tattoo." I wince. Penelope softens, looking between her coworkers guiltily.

"oh no," she complains, then comes over to me and grabs my hand in hers. "is this better?"

I squeeze tightly at the stinging sensation across my thigh, but she doesn't pull away at all.

"yeah." I smile. everyone is watching me intently, so much so that it puts me off a bit. "can we talk about something, maybe? it doesn't help when you're all staring."

"sure," JJ grins. "so..."

the pressure to start a conversation kills any potential for one, and then Spencer clears his throat. "anybody wanna see a cool magic trick?"

I snort and the rest of the team lets out a chuckle as the genius pulls a deck of cards out of his pants pocket. Morgan pats his shoulder. "I hope it works this time."

"it worked last time!" Reid protests, but his cheeks have taken on a slightly rosy hue. I watch him shuffle the mysterious deck and do some fancy tricks that I've never seen before, the corner of his mouth quirking with a sudden air of confidence.

Penelope is still holding my hand, and I can feel the metal of her sparkly rings pressing against my fingers. I choose to focus on the theatrical movements that Spencer is definitely using on purpose instead of the strange, sharp pain.

he fans out the cards and shows them to me, smiling. "pick a card, any card."

"hmm..." I tap my chin thoughtfully and stare at the bright red designs covering the back. I wonder if it's a rigged deck, or if he actually knows tricks. he doesn't seem like the type of person to be into magic. but then again, Spencer is full of surprises. I grab a random one in the middle, pluck it out and memorize it. a red six of spades.

"alright, then..." he grins and slams the deck back into one neat pile, then does some weird shuffling move again and shows the fanned-out deck to Morgan this time. "your turn."

Morgan's gaze flickers between the cards and Reid's face, which is trying to suppress a smile. the dimple on the right side of his cheek twitches once. when Derek taps a card near the end, Spencer nods and does the same thing that he did when I picked one.

except this time, as soon as he's got the whole deck together, he taps them a bit too hard and they go flying. fifty-two-pick-up style, Queens and Kings and Jokers tumbling to the linoleum floor in a defeated descent. my eyes widen and second-hand embarrassment rolls in, followed by the team's stunned silence.

I even feel the tattoo artist falter a bit in his work.

"oh." Spencer says. JJ puts her hand on his shoulder.

"Spence, it's fine."

"no, no, it's not-- I practiced this, like, fifty times last night--" his face is bright red as he drops to his knees. Penelope glances once at you and you return her stare with a pitying expression. Emily goes to help him, then Morgan and JJ.

"let me just..." he gathers up the remaining cards that they hand him, putting them back together into the pile again. I watch as he goes through them, somehow counting at lightning speed before frowning. "we're missing one."

everyone looks around, but it's obvious that there aren't any more stray cards lying about. I feel bad for him, not only because it didn't work but because he practiced it so much. I've been wondering what he does on the weekends-- magic tricks never even crossed my mind.

then Spencer's face lights up.

he comes over to me and gestures to my side, right by the spot where the tattoo artist is working. "may I?"

"uh--" I glance down at where he's pointing, the small patch of bare stomach. "sure?"

his fingertips graze beneath my tummy, between my skin and the smooth leather of the tattoo table, and snatch a card out from under me. it's barely a touch, but my breath hitches in my throat. my fingers tighten just slightly around Penelope's.

he holds up a red six of spades. the enormous grin on his face gives him away. "this wouldn't happen to be your card, would it?"

I gasp and nod, amazement on my face before it's wiped away by the sharp pain of the needle. Spencer displays the red six of spades to the whole team, then basks in their surprised applause.

Emily's smiling in disbelief. "you really had us going for a second."

"wait, wait--" I poke his leg and Spencer turns to me. "how did you do that?"

there's no way he could have hidden it there without me knowing; if he had slipped a card beneath my bare skin, surely I would have felt it. but the magic man just shrugs and shakes his head at me.

"a good magician never shares their secrets, Clea."

this time, the blush spreads over my cheeks. he's cocky right now, and I'd be lying if I said I'm not enjoying it. he's in his element, I realize, even if it is an unexpected one. and as he puts the cards into his back pocket, the group erupts with questions.

he's done magic before in front of them, but they seem to be awestruck by his performance this time. admittedly, I think the whole klutz act really added a nice dramatic element to it.

I'm mostly quiet for the rest of the tattooing process, although everyone else is chattering about the trick and how well the ink is going to turn out. I'm still wracking my brain for ideas of what they chose, but I honestly don't know. I've been banned from peeking.

maybe this was a mistake-- I've only recently joined this team, and already allowed them to decide what's going to be on my body forever. at least it's small. and maybe I'll actually like it; who knows?

when the artist lets out a satisfied sigh and turns the needle off, however, I find myself twisting around and staring frantically at the new design.

"oh my god."

it's a tiny airplane, with two dotted loopty-loops behind it. just small enough to be adorable.

"what do you think?" Garcia asks, eyeing it herself. they all gather around to admire the new design that sits on the outside of my upper thigh. I giggle.

"I love it."

"don't sound so relieved." Emily laughs. I can't help the bubbly excitement in my stomach.

"sorry, I just didn't know what to expect."

Spencer is staring at the ink when he turns to the tattoo artist. "how long until you think it'll be healed?"

the guy stands up to get treatment stuff for it. "I'd say about two weeks, but it varies from person to person." he leaves to grab cling film.

"I thought for sure you'd be the one to know that." I smirk at the genius. he shoves his hands in his pockets, makes sure the artist is out of earshot, and then looks back at you.

"I do know." he scoffs.

"uh huh." I laugh.

"actually, for the record," he lowers his voice. "I'd recommend at least three weeks instead of two. the last thing you want is infected flesh."

"yum, Spencer. thanks for that image." I smile with wide eyes and he shrugs.

...

it's quiet when I shut the door of my apartment shut behind me. I've got a bag full of supplies with me to clean the new art, and I'm feeling lethargic after getting lunch with the team. because Rossi wasn't around to foot the bill, I made the mistake of offering to pay.

we've got the day off after the most recent slew of cases, so I've determined to spend the rest of my day well. I could curl up with a nice documentary, or I could scrub my kitchen and do a little tidying up around here. god knows the film of dust on my bookshelves needs to be wiped away.

oh my god.

am I boring? maybe. possibly.

I shake the thought from my head and bring my things into the kitchen to organize. after spending a few hours cleaning up, I go out grocery shopping, then come home to sit down with a book. my errands take up so much time, I don't even notice the DC sunlight sinking beneath the harsh lines of the city, drenching my apartment in a silky darkness poked through with lit lamps.

it's already 9pm and I kind of want to hang out with someone, but I doubt any of the team wants to spend any more time with me than they did before lunch. or they might have plans with their families.

well, I know one person who definitely doesn't have plans.

I pull out my phone and hit Spencer's contact before I can talk myself out of it, knowing full well that it's not a big deal but still becoming a little nervous. it rings three times before he picks up.

"hello?"

"hey, Spencer."

"Clea. what's-- what's up?" he sounds more confused than anything. probably because I just saw him about an hour ago.

"I know it's late, but do you wanna come over? I'm bored and I feel like you know more about tattoo cleaning than I do." it's a weak excuse.

"why would I know more about tattoo cleaning--"

"you know damn well why, Reid," I laugh. "don't fish for compliments."

there's a slight laugh on the other end of the line before he replies. "I'll be over soon."

I wait patiently, preparing two mugs of coffee in the meantime. I'm sure we'll both want the caffeine, because I have no urge to turn in early tonight. my stomach twists a bit when he calls to tell me he's here, and I go to let him in. I'm not nervous.

except I actually am a little bit nervous when I open the door and there's Spencer with a shy smile and a coat that's a bit too big for him. it hangs off his narrow frame, and I realize that it must have just started raining. his hair is wet and there are dark spots on his clothes where the water has seeped through.

"get inside, my god." I move aside so he can come into the apartment and warm up. he walks in, looks around at my walls. I realize that he's never been here before. "welcome to my humble abode, Dr. Reid."

"it's nice." he compliments without much emotion. I lock the door and turn just in time to see his hand shaking at his side.

"thanks. let me take your coat." I glance out the window, where I now notice the rain pelting the glass.

Spencer shrugs off his jacket and hesitantly lets me hang it on the hook by the door before turning to him with my hands on my hips. "so, how are you?"

"I'm good," he smiles a little and runs a hand through his hair. "I actually read an article on the way here about those psychedelic mushrooms we were discussing the other day."

"is that, like, our thing, now?" I joke and gesture to the couch, where two mugs of hot coffee rest on coasters. he sits down gingerly on the cushions, sitting at the very opposite end of the couch from me.

"I can send it to you, if you'd like." he smiles.

"please do. I've been hoping for some titillating reading, recently." I hand him the mug and he stop before taking a sip.

"how many sugars did you put in this?"

"relax, genius, I'm not out to get you--" I catch his eye. "yet."

he giggles and takes a sip, then another. the smile tugging at my lips is too obvious for my liking; I'm just glad that I got the amount of sugar correct. it would have been funny to ambush him with a sweetness attack, although I think making him come here in the rain was punishment enough.

"have you ever had oat milk?" he asks out of the blue. I frown.

"yeah, why?"

"just wondering. I'm lactose intolerant and was considering trying it."

"you're lactose intolerant?"

"mhmm." he nods enthusiastically.

"I watched you eat three yogurt cups in a row yesterday." I chuckle at the memory of it. he eats so much and remains as skinny as a telephone pole.

"I love dairy." he shrugs it off. I pull my legs up beneath me on the couch and give him a serious expression.

"well, personally, I think oat milk tastes horrendous and it makes me want to vomit, but you should try it."

"noted."

we start to talk about various nondairy alternatives for coffee and it ends up being a surprisingly fun conversation. talking to Spencer has its own charm-- it's not just a conversation, it's a fully immersive experience. from his ambitious vocabulary to the unconscious gestures he makes, all of it keeps me hooked.

I rest my cheek on my palm, elbow leaning against the back of the couch while I nod along to him talking about almond farming. he's got a disdainful expression on his face as he brings up its environmental consequences, punctuating every few sentences with another sip of his coffee.

the rain is still pouring outside. thunder occasionally rolls over the sky and shakes the windows in their panes. my eyes flit from his face to the view when a flash of lightning catches my attention.

"--sorry, we should clean your tattoo." he seems to catch himself mid-thought, realizing that he came here to help me and not just rant about the business of almonds. I smile.

"no worries. this stuff is interesting to me, too."

"there's this documentary out now about it, too, that I've been meaning to watch."

"really?"

"yeah!" his face lights up. "if you want, we can--" he clears his throat. "we can watch it together."

he blushes as he says it, and I can tell that he's worried about how his intentions will come off. he can't take it back, so he runs the pad of his index over his middle finger and fidgets in a subtle way.

"that sounds like fun." I don't want him to feel weird. we've only hung out a few times, and I'm sort of looking forward to it.

"great," he straightens and adjusts his shirt, which has gotten slightly rumpled from his curling up on the couch. his tie is crooked, too. "where are the cleaning supplies?"

"in the kitchen."

"perfect, we should be doing it in there anyway." he stands, pushes a bit of his hair behind his ear while he waits for me to follow-- and I do, albeit with a wince from my tender side. it doesn't hurt as much as I expected.

he follows me into the minuscule kitchen and doesn't hesitate to start going through the things the artist gave me to take home. there's some foam wash and special moisturizer for it, not a lot. it's small enough that the care will be minimal, which is reassuring.

it's only when Spencer's washing his hands that I realize I'll need to unbutton my pants again in order to reach the tattoo. which means this is about to get at least slightly awkward for the both of us.

he turns around just in time to see me unzipping my jeans and his eyes widen.

"how else do you expect to clean it?" I laugh, and he gulps, visibly. his Adam's apple bobs in his throat and he nods in understanding.

"y-yeah, of course." his eyes are everywhere but on me. suddenly, my kitchen walls are incredibly interesting.

I shove down the waistband of my pants until they're just below my upper thigh, then I sit up on the counter and clear my throat. "I can cover some of myself if that makes you more comfortable."

"no, no, that's okay--" he speaks too quickly, then recognizes his mistake. "it's okay. this shouldn't take very long, anyway."

without another word, I shrug and watch him delicately peel away the film. his fingertips are back to barely touching my skin, just like when he pulled that card out from beneath me, and I stop breathing for a moment.

there's also a gel-like substance under the covering, which he tells me is just standard petroleum jelly. Spencer moves with a near surgical (and altogether unnecessary) precision. his eyes are glued to my skin as if forcing them not to stray to my now exposed panties. it doesn't feel sexual at all because it's not, thankfully.

when he uses the foam wash and begins to rub it into my skin, he frowns with concern and looks up at me. "is this okay? you can do it yourself if--"

"it's fine, Reid," I answer too quickly this time. heat rushes to my cheeks. "I honestly thought this was going to be a more complicated process than it really is."

"it's pretty simple, especially for something this small." he shrugs. "obviously, you don't want to get it infected, so I'd just think of it as treating a cut."

silence in our respective positions at the moment makes me nervous, so I change the subject.

"magic tricks, huh?" if anything, I need to distract myself from the way his hand is rubbing over my skin in a totally nonsexual and platonic way.

he relaxes a little, lifting his gaze to mine with a somewhat pleased countenance. "yeah, I love magic."

it's like peeling back a corner of wallpaper and seeing a shade of red beneath; not a lot, but enough to pique my curiosity. "a man of science?"

Spencer shakes his head at the air of faux sophistication I pour into it. "the world needs some wonder."

he says it in an offhand way, although I feel the weight of it from the way he runs a damp paper towel over the last of the cleansing foam. his touch presses into me and his eyes are lowered in a slightly distant way.

"how long have you been into it?" I fight the urge to ask a million questions at once.

"since I was a kid," he jerks back to attention. the grin on his face tells you just how special this is to him. "I used to buy all the books and practice for my mom constantly."

"did you ever do the trick with the never-ending string of handkerchiefs?" I recall one of the only classic moves I know. Reid laughs.

"that one's easy."

"what about the coin behind the ear?" I throw out another one.

Spencer straightens, doesn't even bother to set down the paper towel, before reaching up behind my ear and pulling away with a shiny quarter set between his thumb and forefinger. "you mean this one?"

there it is again, that confidence I saw in the tattoo parlor. he's standing just close enough for me to notice, and I grin as I snatch the metal out of his hand and set it on the counter beside me. "thanks."

"no problem." he laughs.

"you should do that more often."

"the coin trick? I'd go broke." he jokes. I laugh at the rare appearance of Spencer's playful side, hoping to get a bit more of it before we have to go back to being serious at work.

"magic in general, I mean. I think it would brighten up the office a bit."

he thinks about it for a moment, washing his hands again. the sound of the faucet reminds me to put my lotion on my leg. I get to it while he thinks of what to say.

"yeah, maybe you're right."

"I still find it funny that you're into that kind of stuff." I say honestly. of all the things for him to nerd out about, this feels almost comically unexpected. but Reid only gives me a shy smile before replying.

"it always made my mom laugh when I was a kid."

"is she also good at it?"

"tricks? no," he chuckles. there's a washcloth between his long, slender fingers that he's been using to dry them for the past two minutes. at this point, I think he's doing it to keep from fidgeting. "she says it's an old fashioned thing, and that only made me wanna do it more."

"well," I cap the bottle and set it down on the counter, pull my jeans up and lean against the counter with a smile. "I like old fashioned."

Spencer gives a friendly smile. "me too."

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