#i feel like everything is clicking
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I want to tell stories.
That's it.
That's what I want to do with my life.
I don't care how I do it or what I need to do it, I just want to tell stories.
#don't mind me#im just having the realization of a lifetime right now#like it just fucking clicked#that's what i want to be when i grow up#i want people talk about me and say that i told good stories#captivating stories#intricate stories#real stories#human stories#i want people to look at my stories and see themselves#im#im so fucked up over this#i feel like everything is clicking#like i can't get a degree in that#but fuck my degrees are around it#fuck fuck fuck#this is it#this is what i want to do#holy fucking shit
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one of these days i will get cdpr to admit to the truth behind trans kerry
☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
close ups below!
#click for better resolution#(hopefully i fixed? the res problem? j in case ill tag that tho)#trans kerry my beloved#art#my art#ult art#ngl....#was having thoughts and feelings or whatever we wanna call em these days and shrug#guess u could say this did bring me a modicum of joy to draw perhaps#trans kerry makes me queer autistic self like..#:) or something.... kicks rock..#kerry eurodyne#cyberpunk 2077#fanart#kerry eurodyne fanart#trans artist 💚#OKAY WTF DO U WANT FROM ME TUMBLR WHAT CANVAS SIZE WILL SATISFY UR INSATIABLE HUNGER TO FUCKING COMPRESS EVERYTHING I POST#i go smaller its not enough for you i go bigger its not enough i google the size needed thats still not enough#u force my hand to scour reddit for an answer anD THATS STILL NOT ENOUGH#what must i do to please u......#:|#WHY ARE THE CROPS BETTER RES 😭😭
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this post is about qiao ling. but first, I want to talk about the power rangers of this show.
so. I'm really glad YE2 is putting the triple star warrior mirroring in a more interesting context
because that's clearly the intent and it's not like it doesn't make sense back in S1, but the actual execution of that mirroring seemed shallow at best with just S1 knowledge
(look! qiao ling even bought cake of them in the S2 finale)
I think it's because I couldn't quite place qiao ling's role in this until now. she's the star of wisdom, but she's the one who is the most out of the loop and lacking in knowledge... or so we thought. but with the S2 ending giving her tianxi's ability, and YE2 showing that it's a pattern for her to keep relevant information, then yeah, it's starting to make sense. the triple star warriors really are their character arcs.
star of justice, bringing hope (cheng xiaoshi's kindness being both a strength and a weakness that can either uplift or endanger other people; "even if you don't see hope, it doesn't mean it's not there")
star of courage, conquering fear (lu guang timelooping himself is the most extreme response to fear he has over cheng xiaoshi's death)
star of wisdom, serving knowledge (qiao ling and the burden of knowledge that she keeps from people out of guilt or protection)
and they really do need to overcome all of that to get the good ending.
anyway, I just think it's neat. I thought the triple star warriors mirroring was cute back in S1, but now I love it even more knowing qiao ling's place in all of this. I actually love this trait about her. she is always taking care of other people and has "big sister" vibes. she's the one who actually goes out of her way to find clients for shiguang to help and hearing their clients' troubles, even when she had no idea how their abilities worked. she's the one who truly connected with tianxi and knew how to communicate with her — even better than cheng xiaoshi could, and cheng xiaoshi was the one who actually got to live as tianxi.
it's in her nature to care for others, but it's also her biggest flaw. much like lu guang, in her desire to keep cheng xiaoshi safe in her own way, she hides relevant information from him. and the act of secret keeping causes her to keep doing it out of guilt too — as we've seen in the doudou case. it's a very human trait to have.
it puts the earthquake arc in a new context. a young cheng xiaoshi went to qiao ling, distraught over the possibility that maybe his parents died in the earthquake. young qiao ling, wanting to comfort cheng xiaoshi but also knowing that her parents were advised that it's safer for cheng xiaoshi to not go to bridon, tells him that his parents are probably somewhere "far away" and wasn't caught in the earthquake. this isn't just words for the sake of comfort. she has reason to believe this is actually true.
she's in a tough spot when S3 rolls around, because she should, by then, know about cheng xiaoshi's death, if not possibly everything that happened in bridon (through tianxi's power/memory transfer). unlike lu guang, who is dead set on timelooping himself as a way to fix things, qiao ling is in a precarious spot.
should she honor aunt shao's wish and keep cheng xiaoshi safe, which she also wants? or should she tell cheng xiaoshi information he rightfully should know, thereby allowing him to exercise full agency over his own future, even if that future has the risk of death? and whatever she chooses will affect lu guang too. what is the wise thing to do here?
on that note, others have pointed out how this recontextualizes S1E1 cheng xiaoshi talking about his parents. looking back, it's insane to me that S1E1's opening scene (not the dive rules, the one after the op plays) has cheng xiaoshi saying, "I won't go anywhere until my parents come back. if you drive me away, I'll hang myself here! then your father will never get a new tenant."
(it's looking like whatever he learns in bridon won't carry over to the cheng xiaoshi of S1, but I digress)
he says this, and both lu guang and qiao ling are sitting there calling him a childish idiot, all the while harboring knowledge about his parents that cheng xiaoshi doesn't have. (lu guang also has the extra knowledge of cheng xiaoshi's death and what happened in bridon at this point probably, but this post is not about lu guang)
like... in S1 this could just be seen as a little "haha okay so this is exposition and this is their dynamic" scene but now... man. qiao ling knew all this time, in this scene, where his parents might be. she knew during the earthquake. she knew while they were renovating the shop.
I understand the reasons behind it, and in her eyes it probably was the wise thing to do. but when S3 comes around, should she still keep hiding it, like she did with the doudou case? when she confronts lu guang about his memories, what will she do?
I have hope that she'll bridge the two boys together. we saw how her strength has always been communication and delivering words. she is the person the clients look to. she is the person that gained tianxi's trust and knew how to meet her where she's at. she is the person who knows cheng xiaoshi and lu guang best.
here's hoping that she can overcome her guilt and desire to protect cheng xiaoshi from himself, and become the star of wisdom the show wants her to be
#mine musings#liveblogging link click#link click spoilers#link click#obviously i'm team “tell cheng xiaoshi everything” but like i get it#i do sympathize with the reasons#a part of me wants ql to not tell cxs for the sake of messy drama lmao but i do want her to tell him though#aughh but idk if she will bc if she hid it from him before then what will make her not keep hiding it?#there needs to be a new element to this. bc i feel like#if ql and lg keep it a secret. cxs will find out eventually from someone else (maybe lx?)#or on his own. idk idk#i'm talking about S3 btw. not bridon#link click meta
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(AU)
What if you died and something divine loved you so much it couldn't cope with that fact? What if they tried bringing you back but the result was wrong?
More doodles + rambles below:
Now What if what came back was just off. Looks at the divine without the memories that went back decades. It looks, behaves and works in a way just off enough in a way to make the god unable to look at it. it's not you. it's not. it can't be.
.... but what if what got pulled back was still you, but its- YOU'RE wrong and broken in ways you cant understand anymore.
The apocalypse draws closer and closer and you don't know why every day that passes you seem to be falling more and more apart too. The god is gone. You are alone.
....Anyway yeah i fucked up a perfectly normal Lovestory Au. i gave it anxiety is what i did. sorry for horrid typing in 2nd person trying to explain stuff im bad at explaining <3 i draw, not write for a reason lol.
#great god grove#ggg click clack#ggg thespius#ggg lovestory#dont have a name for this au but its haunted me for a week and i finally relented when i saw the fact gods CAN create sentient things#thanks huzzle for letting me be evil [thumbs up]#ANYWAY I PROMISE THERES A HAPPY ENDING IN MY HEAD IM JUST CRUEL AND EVIL#AND ALSO INCREDIBLY CRINGE. APOLOGIES. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN IM ALONE W MY THOUGHTS W NO ONE TO BOUNCE IDEAS OFF OF.#lovestory except everything went wrong at the last second and now everything sucks. Clicky's alone away from everyone. thespius is JUST GON#Huzzle is absolutely losing it's shit in the corner because it's the one that found out first.#Bauhauzzo is trying to not have the world end#and Missy M is absolutely distraught about how everything's gone sideways so fast and is about to start accidentally flooding the grove#cobi isnt even a god yet. (SAD. I MISS HER ALREADY)#sorry this is probably incomprehensible. oops#i think in images and concepts not words so translating a bunch of those hard.#fun part about this was absoultely drawing faces just ever so off from how i draw click clacks expressions to try and nail it aint right#what being off usually being the mouth#if u have questions feel free to ask. ill just stare at them in fear like a deer in headlights /silly#This is Clicky hes just.... a bit messed up. that *is* him; not a copy to be absolutely clear#...even if thespius doesnt think it is#anyway yeah. purple hyacinths right?#sniles#shrivels up and dies#ggg love and loss au
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sweet dreams, my cherrybomb
[original]
#cottonflowers' art ☂#cottonflowers' rain world stuff#bonus + link to original under read more#click for better quality#rain world#rw#slugcat#rain world downpour#artificer#saint#artisaint#karmaflower#rain world shipping#fanart#aughhh i hate the old one sm#not very proud of this one either i feel like the shadows couldve been better#rips open jacket to reveal shirt that says “I ❤️ KARMAFLOWER”#still working on the animatic btw... will probably scrap what i have and redo everything cause it feels too boring#also thinking of a tongues & teeth artisaint animatic/pmv#artificer's pups#meowww
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deep space planet magic gun action!
process under the cut where you can spot when exactly I found leg references
#i had to downsize everything to post so click to see a better version!#trigun#trigun maximum#vash the stampede#vash fanart#trigun vash#trigun stampede#my art#inspired by the star gaze title#also i did handmake the logo btw this is a whole project that maybe includes wowo and nai too but i dont know when ill have the time#this took me literal months and then i couldnt upload it in full cause the og is over 20MB by like 1.3MB so im very sorry its crunchy#im probably gonna keep to a less frequent but more finished polished pieces from now on though it feels better#if you saw me editing to change the signature to the '25 no you didnt
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I saw your doodle requests and idk if youre still taking any but could you do my Harmonia design maybe? (If you want) Love your style btw!!


AAAASORRYTHISTOOK FOREVERR
love your design!! it honestly looks so cool i love how you drew this one as all stained glass ,, lovely lovely woah
#asks#my art#chonny jash#cccc#hope you don’t mind those tiny little add-ons [like the halo fragments up top and the strings] [i got a little carried awayy]#my drawing feels so tiny on here compared to my big ol’ tablet#but thankk you for sending me the ask request ^_^ had fun with it !#everyone please click on the image tumblr chews everything up when it gets posted#cj whole
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Still thinking about how Clover on the No Mercy Route likely would've given up their quest for vengeance and lived with Martlet had Axis not told them that he killed Integrity. The only real difference between Aborted No Mercy Run Clover and No Mercy Run Clover are a few more destroyed robots and the knowledge of what Axis did, which sent their LOVE skyrocketing to LV 19.
Look at them. They can't even look Ceroba in the eye after they inflict the final blow.
#undertale yellow#personally i see Clover's journey on the No Mercy Route as them feeling immense guilt and disgust with themself for killing monsters#but they HAVE to. it's self-defense. they're monsters. any one of them could have killed one of the other children. anything they can#tell themself to justify their own actions. but they can't lie to themself. not entirely. on some level they know what they're doing is#wrong and that's why they gradually lose their ability to recognize themself. and when they get to Axis that's when they're at their most#stressed. they just slaughtered dozens of monsters. they watched the monsters around them (like Angie and Gilbert and Dina) act like people#would under threat/treat them like they would a monster. they terrorized this robot throughout the Steamworks. maybe if they kill this one#they'll feel a sense of fulfillment/finality (they won't. deep inside they know they won't). and then Axis admits to having killed one of#the kids they're looking for and suddenly everything clicks into place. killing him feels like the easiest thing in the world. why were#they so caught up on remorse? just because they got distracted by a society more complex/civil than they thought it'd be? they're all#still kid-killers at the end of the day no matter how nice they all acted.#even then fighting against martlet they still have to deliberately dehumanize her by calling her ''the enemy'' in the first part and remind#themself of what they're fighting for/their freedom and home on the Surface in the second half. their SOUL blasts (which are a#manifestation of them/their will) barely do anything to her unlike Axis and Asgore who are brutally killed by one blast. i think Clover#genuinely liked her (a worthy opponent/they search her memories for a reason to hate her) and regretted killing her but they felt like they#had to. no loose ends.#take away the whole LOVE jump and finding out that Axis killed Integrity and what you have left is a kid who thought they knew what the#right thing to do was yet killed dozens for nothing. they're deeply remorseful and want a chance to better themself. one that Martlet would#offer bc she would see some good in them.#anyways. fat paragraphs in the tags once again#uty analysis#char: clover#yippee. you can see how badly i did in this fight with my remaining hp. jokes on you i beat her first try (this time around)
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noticed the vast majority of E2 players seem to have a blue soul? I wonder what's up with that. what question at the start did we apparently all answer the same way? was it the fortnite one
#everhood#everhood 2#ramblings#cam's game recs#good game btw. somehow more incomprehensible than the first one (positive)#everything kinda finally clicked into place at the end for me with [spoiler character]#still. that makes for a long game to trudge through without knowing what's going on#which i can understand not being some people's cup of tea#and ofc the music goes hard#but anyway back to the topic at hand#why are we all blue???#and apparently it's possible to be PURPLE? or at least a purple soul exists in the game files???#i feel like there's a lot I haven't seen on my first play
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god I love fencing so fucking much
#i feel like my second bout today is when it finally kind of Clicked#i didn't win then and i have before but i think this was the first time i really knew Why i was doing everything that i was doing#fencing
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Not a yet fully complete thought/theory BUT who do you think could be the person that called Vein?
Because as we saw, Liu Xiao was at the cinema with Xia Fei and if he made that call, Xia Fei would notice and he would probably be able to connect the dots. So was it really him or someone else?
Vein went to Wang Qing after that call on someone's instruction

"Give me you know what and I will leave you alone." That's what he said and that's what he was going to do, his munition was sleeping darts so he clearly wasn't there to kill anyone. His orders were precise.
And soon enough we found out what he was looking for.

A book/notebook that Cheng Weimin had in his work desk.
Now, Cheng Xiaoshi's mom is trying to save her husband and his father but where exactly is he? Because there is absolutely no way he died in that fire. It just doesn't seem right. Not with the way everyone reacted when his name is mentioned.
We obviously don't know his entire role in the story but we know he's someone who's a very important character.
So could it be possible that maybe he's the mastermind and that we're in for a bigger plot twist that we expected?

This entire time it's been hinted that Liu Xiao is that mastemind and tbh looking at it all, it feels like he probably is but with so many plot twists happening in this series, what if there's a completely bigger picture behind it all? something that we really didn't expect?
Later, when Xia Fei is with Cheng Xiaoshi and Lu Guang he warns them to take care because the person they're looking for is probably hiding bigger secrets.

And it again shows Liu Xiao but he's standing in front of someone's door. Who lives there? Well the person they were looking for was Cheng Weimin and Xia Fei knows that. So the timing for this scene right as he's saying all this...?
Ugh, I'm having so many thoughts about link click now, the wait to find out what's really going on here is going to be so loooooong!! > <
#also when xia fei went to liu xiao to tell him he doesn't want to work for him anymore liu xiao told him that if he stayed there a bit#longer he would've seen something interesting#i hate how that man ALWAYS seems to be aware and know everything#which again brings strong points to him being the mastermind but idk i really feel like we're in for a big plot twist#we'll see#i don't know when but we'll see#i also have another theory i want to mention but first i need a dinner break#link click#bridon arc#link click spoilers#also remember how liu xiao had xia fei track just cheng xiaoshi and then when they were in the car he added lu guang to the list#why wouldn't he just have them both be followed from the start? they are together all the time after all. i mean they were both followed#in any case but pointing it out like that.. giving extra money to keep an eye on lu guang too when like i said he was already kinda doing#it since him and cheng xiaoshi are a pair.. idk it just feels a little sus to me#xia fei wasn't supposed to keep an eye on both of them from the start. that was changed later#cheng xiaoshi was the first person in focus
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Completing my hachapre collection with Fortune!
Happiness Charge set: Lovely | Princess | Honey | Fortune (here!)
ID: a drawing of Cure Fortune from Happiness Charge Precure. She is standing on a pink surface and looking sternly to the side while holding her Fortune Tambourine. Three violet hearts are to her sides, and she is also surrounded by violet lights in mostly smoky, crescent shapes. The background is a dark magenta sky with stars and three blue planets, and the image is framed with a white border. End ID.
#my art#precure#happiness charge precure#cure fortune#pretty cure#precure fanart#hikawa iona#iona hikawa#artists on tumblr#digital art#magical girls#image description#i might post everything together like i did w healpre ones if i feel like it.. not today tho#i really struggled with this one for some reason. kept trying to redo it and nothing's clicking. ended up with a simpler pose
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*working on my dnd character sheet, thinking about how to distribute a few ability score points*
Me: Hey, my character's based on VR-LA, I'll take a look at his stats!
*scours the internet for one of those official art images with the stats on it, ends up on RWD twitter page*
*sees this exact image*

Me (realization hitting me like a truck): BILEYG IS A COLUMBO REFERENCE
#ill be honest i havent listened to any of campaign 2 yet#so i dont actually know if this is real or not#and if it is it may be a cold take (ive avoided most spoilers for campaign 2 so i really dont know)#but i feel like i just had one of those big dramatic moments in a movie where everything just clicks together#like i was asleep but suddenly woke up with the clearest view of the world#that sounds super dramatic but thats how it felt#anyway#this post is brought to you by the 2024 d&d 5e players handbook#also sponsored by osp reds love of columbo#osp red#rolling with difficulty#rwd#bileyg rwd#jess says stuff
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I think I need that "Wow, I haven't stubbed my toe in five months! I was then shot fifty-seven times." Audio again
#i want to put him on my blog because i have a lot to say. and. by golly.is it just too much than anyone needs.#yet another character for me to completely RUIN their ego and make them so much more worse than they already are.#see but i just realized last night that putting him on my blog would mean making a tag for him. And that is goingnto take a lot from me-#-to be putting stupid little hearts next to his name.#i was thinking about just posting like two pictures of him and being like “im not saying anything i think yall can connect the dots.”#but. but.hhhhhrhrhrggrgyryrg.I want to come home and immediately indulge in garbage about him until i go to bed.#This is so messed up!! maybe. maybe I'm just being mind controlled into this.#I'd say sorry for another new guy but i mean I've been doing this the past several months and yall havent known me long enough that-#-it is unexpected so really i suppose yall are here for it.#Depending on how long till i get my first 'task' of the morning at work depends on whether I'll makebthe dumb post about him-#-this morning for everyone to wake up to or later today for everyone to anxiously read like they're reading the news while eating.#It is actually so so so so bad. and i domt know why. i do not understand. i cannot wrap my head around what about him is-#-hitting me so badly. what is making him click. this wasn't even a 'the dam gates got opened' and i had a burst and chilled out.#which i thought what was going to happen. this is. this is like a constant stream of a running waterfall. okay.#Normally talk about particular F/Os with particular people cause blah blah embarassment or they followed me-#-and interacted with me because of a particular character(s) that I like.#but i wan.gh. i want to.ffffffjhhgghhhghhhhhhhhhhhg.d.deep breath.#i want to. talk about him. wherever i can. i like. i want to taint every image there might be of myself to talk about him.#maybe the problem is im trying to find rhyme or reason where there is none. logic and feelings are often two different drivers.#trying to find a 'why' when there is no 'why' to begin with because that would insinuate a cause and effect scenario.#Which is a scientific process and critical thinking thought path. which is brain stuff.#and this is all heart stuff. stupid. stupid heart stuff.#good morniny everyone. wishing you all well on your marry ways.#I NEED TO STOP DEAWING HIM. I've drawn him like fifty freaking times already.#normally itt takes me ages to work up drawing him.#oh fuck it fuck everything im changing my discord pfp im posting about him im going to go need to go into confinement.#i might feel slifhtly different whem i get home but it's fine it's fine i domt need to be scared it's fine.#it's my blog it's my dumb little discord pfp. I've literslly rattled my mouth off to someone about him and they-#-were nothing but a dear about it it's. fine I'm just. grtting in my head about it all.
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I was so ready to be constantly confused while playing Death Stranding cuz every article I saw about the game was like "Couldn't understand a single thing that happened 10/10" but I think speed-running The Locked Tomb series only a few months ago prepared me perfectly. I didn't get half of what went down in those books and I love them with all my heart. Turns out confusing post-apocalyptic necromancy with peculiar humour, life/death energies, splitting souls between body/mind, unique worldbuilding, cosmic horror and homoerotic vibes is the perfect niche for me
#death stranding#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#hideo kojima#harrow the ninth#girl I was so lost in the book#and I loved every second of it#both DS and TLT do fantastic lead up to twists tbh#where you're confused about something for most of the story#and then suddenly everything clicks into place#this post in general is aimed at a very niche audience#but also i can't be the only one#both are such beautiful narratives about love loss life and death#about fate and ending the world because you think you know better#I feel like there should be some overlap in this venn diagram#there's a moment where Sam goes 'what's even the point' while doing mission shit near the end of the game and Lou makes some kind of noise#And it reminded me of the scene near the end of Nona where she remembers Noodle is with them#Like thats what life is about#to protect and care and to give out kindness to those we love#the point is that there might even be one small being that makes life worth fighting for#even when you're exhausted
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oh i just felt my stomach drop. no...
#ghhhhhh okok working theory now:#he actually can't get out of this situation. it's not where he intended to be not what he wanted to do#but he has to keep going and pretend it's all fine because that's his only option.#he's got to keep playing the part. also explains his jealousy of joker#probably not only because he's improved so quickly but because joker managed to dig himself out of his situation#whereas it looks like akechi dug himself further in and stopping is not only impossible from his pov but also means giving up#joker's also someone he started to enjoy spending time with. and i still do think that was genuine.#do you think the possibility of a genuine friendship with him was too painful to consider now that he's so far down this path?#do you think that's part of the reason joker had to die?#akechi voice: 'i just need to crush my feelings and then everything will be fine'#i am. so close to understanding what's going on here. i can't wait for it to all click into place.#storyrambles#story plays persona 5#mementos mission#goro akechi#random thoughts
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