#i dont watch 2003 all that often

[sad-leon]

Anyone got any Leo-centric rise/2003 crossover fics?

I've read a few but need more

The 2003 bois are precious to me and I need them to interact with my Rise bois

I ask this as if I dont have a few long fics (*cough* Ghost) in my Marked for Later list

[dettiqueen]

Mikey rant ( tw opinions abt mikey that some ppl may not agree with 😔)

so. something i never say bc i dont rlly know how to say it is, Michelangelo has never been my favorite turtle. in fact usually he is my least favorite, and idk why. ive found him annoying sometimes but other times im like “nah hes just a lil silly guy” but tbh that was mostly for 2012 and 2003. and i know it sucks bc hes a lot of people favorite, and yeah i totally get that! hes fun and lovable but hes just never been for me.

but when i saw Rise that changed, his character was no longer just “haha wacky party dude” and now it showed who he was as a youngest brother, which imo is exactly what he needed. the writers did an AMAZING Job at giving all the characters so much dimension that even one of the characters who i had previously only known as the comic relief now had an entire personality that still felt like it could be mikey and not OOC.

Then MM came out, and i was ready for it to go back to the old Michelangelo tropes, but i was so pleasantly surprised by MM mikey. i actually REALLY liked him in this movie and i was super happy abt that. So i LOVED those two mikeys. Now TOTTMNT came out and im watching it, i cant get over how much i love this Mikey and how different he is. (yes ik its the same mikey im js using the different terms to be accurate) He isnt just dumbed down to the random goofy brother who lets anything fly, he gets kinda mad at some parts which sounds like a weird thing to point out, but its not something i see often with the older mikeys ( i mean they usually get mad at raph but at other ppl its kinda different )

i rly like this version of him and idk to place it as my fav or second fav (to rise ofc)  i feel like it would be unfair to call him “The Best Mikey” Considering how new he is compared to the others, but i would be lying if i said he wasnt already so much better than some of the others (personality-wise i mean. and i do not hate any of the Michelangelos and i wanna make that clear.) Also im pretty sure TottmnT mikey is second youngest? and im pretty sure thats new, its cool though it suits him and i think maybe him not being the youngest had smth to do with this character change? idk js a theory… a game-im just playing. I could talk abt this a lot and i might do if again later. Ty for listening and i would love to hear your thoughts like, did anyone else feel a bit annoyed by the way the older mikeys were portrayed?? i lowk liked ‘07 mikey even tho he was there for like 5 seconds💀 but lll have to rewatch it again to compare. Hyper-fixation is absolutely insane . 

[myk-elric]

My fiance and i just finished watching Fullmetal Alchemist 2003 all the way through. It was his first ever watch and it had been YEARS since i last sat down to watch it. Rly glad i own it on dvd. Now we just gotta watch conquerer of Shamballa someday soon!! Unpopular opinion but i like the movie a lot.

Spoilers and discussion points abt 2003 while its fresh on my mind below cut! Feel free to reblog, quote reblog, or comment/reply with any thoughts/responses!! I love fma so much

envy is just pure evil in this version holy fuck

Envy is also *gender envy* this version, his voice in the dub even is gayer

Holy fucking shit did bradley just snap little selim's neck in front of dying and traumatized Roy!?! (Tyler and i both gasped a little in this scene. I had completely forgot abt it)

The ending feels rushed. I wonder why after an ok pacing the rest of the 59ish episodes

WinryxSheska forever in 2003 they so cute

This version really drove home and reminded u in so many (often times painful) ways and often: Ed and Al are CHILDREN

Nina :-: Alexander ;_; 03 is so fucking tragic so many times and ways

I wish tucker had died a brutal death as he deserved

With how tragic the tone and story was, some of the funny bits or typical boob shots felt a little awkward and out of place sometimes

Our world Ed dying under that blimp and Edward grasping he accidentally just killed another life to somehow save his own- i near choked up on eds small soft voice of true sadness

Ed dying to Envy. That was actually haunting to watch and see

I actually rly appreciate that the gore blood and traumatic shit wasnt hidden or blurred or cleaned up for tv. It would have felt wrong if blood didnt appear and ooze somewhat realistically after someone got stabbed in the heart or sliced up by bradley or shot in the arm etc

I want to watch more anime that dont shy from gore like fma doesnt

I want to give rose a hug. Im glad the rockbell house gave her and her baby a home and people to love her post al return

I hated Archer. What actual purpose did he rly serve other than being super evil and feeling like a kimblee clone?

Actually liked that scar killed kimblee for revenge of his brother in 03. It fit.

Oh also about the ending- it was so dialogue heavy! Opinion not meant to be a negative one but just a surprising observation i guess

Izumi, Sig, pinako, plz adopt me u kind and stern souls

Al losing his entire memory and the whole gate jumping was confusing. Especially to my partner since its his first watch

Like I understood the explanations they gave right at the end they are speculating to be tru but man. 03 leaves a lot of open narratives and storylines unfinished

Even in shamballa i remember there even still being a lack of answers for a lot of story lines

Ok im done for now im v tired

[weirdlizard26]

Hey Will. Could you explain Doctor Who to me? I am very confused about what its supposed to be and while I could just google it it'd be nicer to hear it from you

boy where do i even start! its a REALLY old sci-fi tv show that started back in 1963 and then kinda started a new era as a functionally new series in 2003? although i have not yet watched classic dr who so i dont know all the details!! what im watching right now is the show that started in 2003 and is still going, although if im not mistaken theyll be entering a new era once the 15th doctor's seasons start airing? but i havent quite gotten there so idk

now with what you did not ask for out of the way! its a sci-fi show with a dash of mystery and occasional horror! it follows sort of a monster of the week format with many recurring characters and is about this immortal alien guy (the doctor) who travels in a time machine slash spaceship that looks like an old-timey police box and is bigger on the inside! he is the last of his kind (or is he?!?!?!?! 🤨) and he travels around time and space to enjoy views and save planets and occasionally picks up companions who travel with him and keep him grounded but eventually has to drop them off back home because he doesnt want to watch them die </3 he is very old and very lonely and is haunted by his past and he allegedly solves conflicts with minimal violence although the show isnt particularly good about upholding that standard LOL!!! although sometimes that is on purpose

this show can be your devil or your angle as it tackles a lot of complex topics and often fails to deliver a proper perspective on them unfortunately but its a lot of fun and very heartfelt at times :-]

[ritz-writes]

Get to know me tag game! I was tagged by @celestialcrowley

It's a long post so I'll put a cut here <3

Real Name: [REDACTED]

Nickname(s): [REDACTED]

Nickname Origin(s): [REDACTED]

Sorry, I'm not giving out my irl name </3

Preferred Name(s): Call me Ritz!

Ao3: RitzWrites

Social Media(s): I have a Facebook, TikTok, Instagram, Pillowfort, Twitter. The only ones under Ritz tho are ao3, Twitter, pillowfort, and insta, tho I never use the insta.

State: Won't say the state I currently live in (tho i mightve mentioned it in a post somewhere probably) but I grew up in Texas

Birthdate: May 28

Pet(s): Currently have 7 cats and 1 dog in my house. One cat is specifically mine

Hobbies: Writing, reading, drawing, watching youtube, screaming about my fandoms

Personality: I'm the sunshine character, but I swear a lot. Also if you wrong my friends I feel it personally and will be very angy. I'm very open minded and won't make an opinion on smth until I get all the facts. I want to be friends with everyone but the gods nerfed me with social anxiety ;w;

Favorite Holiday(s): Christmas has always been special to me and give me Nice emotions. Halloween is also good tho.

Favorite Drink(s): Kiddo me would have an aneurysm when she finds out I like vanilla lattes. She swore up and down she'd never like coffee lmao. I also love strawberry milk and sprite.

Favorite Food(s): Pizza, donuts, sirloin, airheads candy, beef stroganoff

Favorite Dessert(s): Cookies and cream ice cream, cookies, brownies

Favorite Color(s): Pink!! I tried changing it when I was younger cuz I didn't want to be the stereotypical girl," but I've always loved pink. Gold is also nice, as well as pastel colors in general.

Favorite Quote(s): "New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings," -Lao Tzu

Favorite Book(s): The Enhanced series by T.C. Edge (I haven't finished reading it tho)

Favorite TV Show(s): Good Omens, Lego Monkie Kid, 2003 Ninja Turtles, Transformers Prime, Batman The Animated Series

Favorite Movie(s): Ocean's 8, Black Panther, The Martian, John Wick

Favorite Character(s): Crowley, Aziraphale, Muriel, MK, Wukong, Macaque, Tang, Jason Todd, Peter Parker, Tony Stark

Favorite Actor(s): David Tennant, Michael Sheen, Tom Holland, Zendaya, Robert Downey Jr.

Favorite Song(s): There's so many, but I'll list a few. Last One Standing by Icon for Hire. Ohio by Bowling for Soup. Rich and the Famous by Good Charlotte. and literally anything by set it off cuz they r my fav band

Favorite Music Genre(s): Pop Punk. Or what some ppl r now calling divorced dad rock

Favorite Podcast(s): I haven't listened to it in a hot minute, but My Brother My Brother and Me

Have You Ever Met A Celebrity: I met some YouTubers at a convention once, but I don't watch the channel anymore

Have You Ever Been To A Concert: Yeah. To see Fall Out Boy. It was outside and I had no water. Was fun tho

Do You Collect Anything: Braincells. I keep losing them tho (no I dont collect anything)

Do You Have Any Idols: Uhhhh I'm not sure. I have ppl I think are cool? I guess you could say my mom is my idol?

Is There A Real Life Friend You Can Completely Be Yourself With: My partner @novelcain <33

What Are Your Interests: Anything I end up hyperfixating on. So right now its Good Omens. Once s5 of Lego Monkie Kid comes out tho, I know that's where my brain will be. I also love graphic design, but I haven't been able to do it in ages.

Where Would You Love To Travel To: Maybe Scotland? Or Italy? I wanna go to Japan some day too.

Is There A Random Fact About Yourself That You’d Like To Share: I have binocular double vision, which means I see two things :) My glasses help a bit with that issue

tags: anyone who wants to do it

[impulsea]

what do you think the best ariel barbie/doll out there is? which design? i often feel like they dont quite capture her especially with the modern ones

This is such a great question! It completely depends on how specific your question is regarding the word best- are we talking best design, best molded face, best generation of Ariel, best company that produced her in doll form, etc etc etc?

For nostalgic reasons, my favorite Ariel doll is the first one I ever owned! She's from the Disney Sparkling Princess line released by Mattel in 2001 and features the pink ballgown from the film. I cannot overstate the importance of this Barbie to me. I first saw The Little Mermaid when I was five, which was around the time of this doll's release, from a copy of a VHS tape I rented from my public library in Covina, California. At the time, The Little Mermaid was in the Disney vault- so I literally couldn't watch the film (I remember asking the sales representatives at Target if they had a copy, since Snow White had been out of the vault at the time but none of the other Disney Princess movies) unless I had rented it from the library and no one else had checked it out. The film (obviously) had a profound impact on me and I wanted more than anything to own it. I had no merchandise around it, and the two girl cousins I had and my sister both hated Ariel so I pretty much had no chance...until I saw this doll in Target! I remember being so torn between this doll and the Cinderella one in the line. Cinderella was in her pink dress, which had been the only time a Barbie of hers had been released in the dress her mother had owned, and that was and is my favorite Disney look of all time that's so special and dear to me. Merchandise of Cinderella in that look was also incredibly rare and it was tugging on my heart strings...however! Ariel in her pink dress was almost as rare, and I had just seen The Little Mermaid and was going through my Ariel phase (I had seen Cinderella two or three years prior and had been mad about her for years, too) and my favorite look of Ariel's was of her in the pink dress! So I ended up going with Ariel and it was the only doll of her I had owned as a child.

Nostalgia aside, I actually think the best Ariel's did come out from my childhood though? Like, two years later, Mattel released another Ariel which I think might be the prettiest Ariel doll I've ever seen with such an enchanting outfit. They matched her portions perfectly, with her rounded forehead, clear eyes, and distinct lip shape. All the Ariel dolls from about 2000-2003 simply don't miss though. The Disney Store dolls were so beautiful. The standard version from the early 2000s, while not distinctly Ariel, is still so charming and lovely. I love all the variations they did too- the magic hair Ariel, the Masquerade Ariel, the ballerina Ariel, to name a few. Overall, I think the 90s/early 2000s of the Mattel wave handled Ariel the best. Objectively speaking, the 1997 dolls were probably the best. The Wedding Ariel, Valentine's Day Ariel, the Towns Dress Ariel, and the Babysitter Ariel I reblogged recently CARRIED- not to mention the iconic Tropical Splash series. I want to own all the original Tyco releases, for collector purposes, and I do genuinely think they capture something of the universe in a great way. But I definitely would have to go with the 90s/early 2000s Mattel dolls as the best Ariel ones, with my favorites being the 2001 Sparkling Series I mentioned for Nostalgic reasons and for design purposes, I really love both the 1997 wedding and babysitter Ariel!

[ray-the-fanatic]

god i felt that headcanon post in my soul. ngl the main reason i chose to back away from the rise fandom (tho i'm referring to now, i dipped into it from time to time back when the show was still airing on nick) is bc of the fans' flight or fight reactions if you don't always agree w/ them, and/or if you have different hc's and opinions generally, that would range from 'eh doesn't sound interesting' to 'no, here's where you're wrong'.

i was interacting with some of the fandom for almost a month and a lot of them gave me, along w/ other pre-movie fans, so much crap for hcs n preferences like 'i hc donnie's eye's the same colors as his googles' 'i believe leo's the second oldest' 'i think raph should stay as leader and have leo be second in command/co-leader' ect.

the worse part is that this is mostly with the newer, younger fans that came after either the movie trailer or movie in general came out (sort of a baby's first fandom ordeal). like yeah there were obv bad eggs but i remembered the fandom being generally chill with each other back then, same with the general tmnt fandom tbh, now it just feels like any other fandom 😞

((been wanting to get this off my chest for the longest time now ^^;;))

In part this is why Im not to much into Rise fandom I mean the drama over Leo/sagi alone but yeah it is for sure an issue I see with fandom as of late the new fandom is just not as accepting of things as simple as don't like don't look. They dont seem to understand not everyone is going to share thier thought as well or that some people may headcannon something other than they do for whatever reason. It's a big shift from what I'm used to myself but I've always stuck more into smaller areas of fandoms but as of late i tend to enjoy older shows and such more.

because many of these fans tend to skip to what is current they may dip into older stuff and some have looked into other tmnt series. Not many others have. I have noticed how vocal they can be for headcannons and such and ya knows it's fine to have your headcannon but wanna know what is also fun? sharing and seeing others?

I always love seeing other peoples reason for why they may see something for a charater. Best example i got atm is my friend states Casey anger being more cold over how often anger is related to fire. And I love that because it fits so well for him. I find it a bit silly how protective over certien things people can get like the turtles eye colors alone. Sadly I was keeping away from tmnt when rise came out I was one of the fans who didn't watch it till far later just before the movie so i'm not sure how it was then I know it's not all bad but some cricles can be but that is fandom over all. Thoguh I'm old and I just notice that this part of fandoms may be small but are awfully loud. This is why I keep to smaller corners or older shows. Like 2003 and 2012. Im a tad obsessed with Fast Forward ATM just cause i've been re watching it lol. It's annoying for sure, and it can damper the mood when fans just can't be chill with each other.

[octolingkiera]

12, 14, 17, 23!

omg hiiii anon~ lol thanks for the ask!! :0

(the list)

12. Favorite turtle across all iterations?

i havent seen most tmnts, so i don't know if i have a single favorite across All iterations, exactly, but i can name my favorite one(s) from the ones ive seen! (which are rise, MM, and 87)

(i need to watch more but there's scheduling conflicts with friends and sitting down to watch new stuff is so hard sometimes WAH)

SO!! for rise, my favorites are leo and donnie (they're constantly engaged in a fist fight in my head for who's number one, tho leo tends to edge donnie out more often) bc they're both just. chefkiss. hashtag relatable and also just absolutely hilarious

for 87 i really like raphael bc he's a snarky little shit, tho donatello is also really great bc he's just. casually unhinged lol

MM raph is also really great (and also lowkey unhinged) but i like the others as well. i feel like it'll be easier to pass judgement on favorites once the show is out and we get to see them in some different situations!!

as a bonus, just judging from fanworks ive seen, i think i'd also be a fan of 2003 donnie (who is also casually unhinged from the sounds of things) andddd idk, 2012 mikey??? he's just a silly lil guy

14. Which character would you want to be friends with?

ooooh uhhhh. prolly Any of the mikeys tbh LOL (except bayverse 💀) tho 87 raphael and rise leo and donnie would be an absolute riot to hang out with lol. i feel like the three of them together would just shoot the shit and be the WORST gossips but in like the best way lol

17. What’s your favorite pizza topping(s)?

im super lame in that my favorite toppings are just. cheese, pepperoni, sausage, bacon,,, lol. im not a fan of most vegetables, and something like hawaiian... i dont like ham at all, so that's a no from me just bc of that

23. If you could have a tmnt crossover with ANY other series, which would it be?

oooh that's a tough one. i feel like tmnt could make for some really fun crossovers with both other superhero series, and also series either based in NYC or having to do with like. weird scifi/fantasy/supernatural stuff. there's a LOT of like. aliens and robots and magic stuff in tmnt, (like WAY more than i expected going into the 87 show after rise) so i feel like a lot of stuff could be twisted to work well

ive seen some really good rise crossovers with marvel/dc, a few really fun danny phantom crossovers, and even a couple with gravity falls. ive ALSO seen a couple with sonic and some of them make me laugh so hard reading the summary that i don't think i'd be able to read them lol. the first fic i ever read with tmnt in it WAS actually a sonic crossover (that i read on ffn waaaaaay back in the day) so in a way it's like returning to my roots lol

i love seeing specific crossovers of my interests so if i see one that grabs my attention im all over it lol

more specifically, i would love to see a crossover with rise of the tmnt and american dragon jake long, and it's like. a future project of mine. i've been talking about it with a friend and telling her for Months that they have a lot in common and it would make for an interesting fic. there's some serious potential there i think!!

(on a more theoretical note, ive also done some really light brainstorming/daydreaming about a potential rise/undertale crossover bc i think it'd make for some neat scenarios lol)

[crazedtmnt]

Not rlly a request at all, but i have a headcanon that Mikey(specifically 2003) is actually rlly tech smart, but often asks Donnies help because he veiws it as bonding time even tho often donnie is grumpy about beong pulled away from his work

Do you have any headcanons you havent said before/rlly like?(i dont wanna waste your time with this ask lol)

Ah, sorry it took me so long to get to this, but I love this ask and I have a few headcanons that come to mind!

One I thought of that I like a lot is that Leo is a big fan of mystery novels and detective shows. He enjoys trying to figure out where the story is going and who the bad guy is. It keeps his mind sharp and he thinks it might help when they have to investigate crimes or stalk out bad guys--figuring out who they might be working with, where they're going after, what the point of their deals are, and so on.

I also like this headcanon because too many people think the thing Leo does to relax is just meditating, but, other than one or two times in the 2003 cartoon, I've never seen him meditate for fun. It's only ever for specific lessons or techniques Splinter is trying to teach. What is he often shown doing for fun in all cartoons, though? Reading books or watching TV. If I have to read one more story or headcanon that mentions Leo meditating when he's not training, I'm gonna scream... That's not an activity guys; it's a way to center yourself. It's essentially another form of training. Let Leo have some actual downtime.

Moving on...

My second headcanon is actually pretty similar to yours, but it's less a headcanon and more a fact forgotten over time. XD Back in the 2003 cartoon, Raph is a huge motorcycle fan and is very good with the mechanics of vehicles and such. So while Donnie is the main engineer, I headcanon that Raph is also the one the others go to for little repairs and such. He's good with his hands and if he accidentally breaks the TV in anger, he'll be the one to fix it too. He finds maintaining vehicles, especially motorcycles, very calming.

My third headcanon ties into the one above. A lot of people basically throw everything mildly science-related at Donnie, as if he does everything and his brothers only fight. But I believe first aid is something that both Leo and Mikey are adept at doing for their family. Donnie might be able to understand and create different chemical formulas, but he's not the one patching people up. He fixes machines, not people (he can if he has to, but he prefers not to--a side note to this headcanon is that I think Donnie is a little squeamish and doesn't like messing with sick or injured bodies because they gross him out).

Leo picked up first aid because he felt it was his duty as the eldest brother to take care of them, and Mikey picked up on it because he wanted to help and make sure Leo was taken care of too. Over time, they shared the responsibility and found their own ways to help.

Both patch up people after battle, but outside major injuries Leo is good about keeping track of everyone's health overall and ensuring his family is eating well and not straining themselves. He's the one who'll know how to stretch a sore muscle and what triggers a headache. He is always recommending fluids and healthy snacks if someone is feeling a little off. Mikey likes taking care of people once they are actually sick. He knows how to alleviate symptoms, how to cook nice meals for an upset stomach, and he's always ready to make a sick person smile. So, Leo tries to prevent you from getting sick and Mikey will take care of you if you do get sick.

That's all I can think of right now. I definitely have more, but these are some of my most thought out. What headcanons do you guys have?

[reactionimagesdaily]

I dont understand bionicles at all, so maybe a crash course into like. 1) what a bionicle is 2) general plot of the bionicle story? happy 5k btw <3 love ur page!

OH BOY OH BOY, this is a question I've been waiting for. Thank you so much for asking, and I’m glad you like my page!! <333

A couple of disclaimers, before I start: I'm going to focus mostly on the mainline plot, but let it be known that there WERE a bunch of serial stories and comics and games that added to the story overall. Bionicle was, I think, one of the first big instances of a plot that was consumed through a bunch of different mediums.

I'm also going to try and do a lot of streamlining - it's not that I DON'T want to talk about bionicle, but there's 10+ years of story to cover, so... yeah. :P

Also! Sorry in advance to anyone whose 'read more' function doesn't work, because this is gonna be a doozy

So, what is a bionicle? From a meta perspective, Bionicle is a Lego theme that ran from 2001-2010, and was briefly rebooted from 2015-2016. It's name is a mashup of biological chronicle, and it was hugely successful in its time, essentially helping to save the Lego company from bankruptcy. The idea is that you use finnicky technical pieces to build humanoid figures (and sometimes their vehicles!) and then. play with them

From a textual/lore perspective, I'm not sure Bionicle is an in-universe term lol. But the characters that we recognise as 'bionicles' are grouped into a bunch of different classifications - 'Toa', 'Matoran', 'Makuta', 'Glatorian', and so on. The characters are kinda like inverse cyborgs, where there's metal on the outside and flesh and muscle on the inside. They often function like robots (e.g. have removable and replaceable masks that they constantly wear over their faces) but are still essentially living creatures.

So, what's the general plot of the story?

...[inhales deeply] Okay

In the time before time, there's an island called Mata Nui that sits in the middle of the ocean. It's populated by these dinky lil' guys called 'Matoran' that live in six villages organised by elements - fire, water, ice, air, earth, and stone. They eke out a life as best they can, facing dangerous wild animals (collectively called 'Rahi') and worshipping the Great Spirit, who is confusingly also called Mata Nui. (They named the island after him.) The great spirit, they say, once watched over them all, but was long ago forced into an enchanted sleep by his evil brother.

(These are the matoran. Look at these cute little guys :3)

One day, six canisters wash ashore, on the island's golden beaches. And out of these canisters step six strange figures called Toa. Tall, strong, and heavily armed, there is one of these 'Toa' for each of the villages, and each of these guys have control over an element. They are the main 'heroes' of this story.

(These are the six Toa. Here's a fun game - spot the girl!)

Each of the six Toa are named characters - from left to right we have Onua (wise and grounded), Lewa (fun-loving and mischievous), Pohatu (friendly and confident), Tahu (hot-headed and impulsive), Kopaka (cold and quiet), and Gali (intelligent and compromising). Some of the Matoran are also named characters - there's Jaller, the captain of the guard at the fire village, Hahli, a sports player from the water village, Matoro, a translator from the ice village, and Takua, who's technically from the fire village but is also an 'outsider' who tends to wander the island. Takua is especially important because he becomes the Toa's 'chronicler', following them around on their adventures and writing everything down for posterity.

Without getting into too much detail, the Toa spend two real-life years getting into wacky highjinks. They hunt for masks (as aforementioned, the masks they wear can be removed and replaced) that grant them special powers, fight the Rahi, and also face up against a terrifying race of creatures with mind-control powers called the Bohrok that are determined to strip the island of all life. They also fight against a being called Makuta, a mysterious shadowy figure who claims to be the brother that forced Mata Nui into his slumber. When they first meet him, Makuta takes the form of a Matoran to throw them off, before turning into a nebulous black void and doing his best to murder them all to death.

(Makuta as he appears in 2001's 'Mata Nui Online Game'. As far as villain introductions go, marching out to meet all the heroes and then telling them "I bore you, for I am nothing. It is from nothing that you came, and it is into nothing you will go. The people of this world are builders, but look into their hearts, and you will find they also have the power to destroy. I am that power. I am destruction. And I will destroy you." is pretty fucking solid though I say so myself.)

There’s a lot of cool worldbuilding and mysterious details about the island. At one point, the earth Matoran note that they can only dig so far into the dirt before they come across some hard material - some type of metal - that they just can’t break through. Also, amidst the stars in the sky, there’s an ominous blood-red star that’s appropriately known as the Red Star. What’s it doing there? Nobody knows

Also at one point, the Toa also get mutated into new forms after falling into a liquid that's called 'energized protodermis' but should really be called 'McGuffin Sauce'. There's a lot of changing forms and characters being mutated in this series in general, which I'm sure has nothing to do with the fact that Lego always needed new figures to make into toys.

(This is how the Toa look after being mutated. In these forms, they're referred to as the Toa Nuva -and let me assure you that that distinction will soon become necessary. :P)

So, in 2003 in our world (I’m not sure about the timeline within the lore), Takua the chronicler finds a mysterious mask and brings it back to the Turaga, who are the wise old rulers of the Matoran (The most promiment of the Turaga is the Turaga of fire, who’s called Vakama. He’s an even-tempered and wise old man who’s not above hitting villains with his walking stick if they threaten his village.). It turns out that the mask is special - it’s the mask of Light, and it’s part of a prophecy that involves the arrival of a seventh Toa who’s destined to defeat Makuta. So Takua and Jaller go on an adventure to try and find the seventh Toa.

Meanwhile, Makuta isn’t just going to sit around and wait for the Toa who’s destined to defeat him to rock up: he unleashes his secret weapons, the Rahkshi, who are, in lore, suits of armour driven by slugs. Sounds corny - in practice, they’re hella intimidating.

(Look at these bad boys)

Some more adventures happen and, to make a long story short, the Rahkshi kill Jaller and Takua the chronicler puts the mask of light onto his own face, transforming into Takanuva, the Toa of Light. The audience surrogate and ‘weird’ character was the secret hero all along!! I love that honestly.

(Takua and Takanuva - before and after)

As someone with light powers, Takanuva is essentially the perfect counter to the big bad Makuta, who has shadow powers, so he finds Makuta’s lair intent on beating him. Makuta challenges him to a game that’s called ‘Kohlii’ but is basically this universe’s version of lacrosse - Takanuva accepts and proceeds to wipe the floor with him. During their fight, they fall into another conveniently-placed pool of energized protodermis and become merged, forming a new being called ‘Takutanuva’. Takutanuva doesn’t stick around very long, because he’s this weird contradictory being of both light and shadow, but before he fractures he opens a gate underneath Mata Nui and lets the Toa, the Turaga, and some named Matoran get through. Inside, they find a hidden city - a whole other world.

Takutanuva then manages to use his powers to hack the universe and bring Jaller back to life. Hooray! After that, he dies, and Takanuva is back. Makuta is nowhere to be found. [eyes emoji]

So now the Toa, the old Turaga, and a couple of Matoran are inside this whole new location, and they’re all wondering what the heck is going on. Well, not all of them are wondering. Vakama, the head Turaga, steps forward and admits that actually, the six (seven) Toa heros that we’ve come to know and love... aren’t actually the first Toa. Gasp!

The next two years of sets and story are essentially one giant flashback, as Vakama tells the current heroes about adventures past. It turns out that the hidden city they’ve found is called Metru Nui, and once upon a time, Vakama and the other Turaga were Toa themselves, fighting to keep the city and the matoran safe.

(New (old) Toa! The flying green one is Matau, who was a stunt-driving excitable madman, and then on the ground from left to right we have Whenua (nerdy chronicler), Nokama (schoolteacher-turned-superhero), Vakama (anxiety-ridden leader), Nuju (absent-minded stargazer), and Onewa (racist prick who needs (and gets) a character arc). To differentiate themselves from the Toa that we’ve come to know and love, these Toa are the Toa Metru)

They had a bunch of adventures of their own. They fought the Vahki (capture robots upholding an authoritarian police state) and the Morbuzakh (evil sentient vines), and they also had ‘arch enemies’ in the form of the Dark Hunters, who were mercenaries that hunted Toa.

Also, that story about Makuta putting Mata Nui to sleep? Not a story so much as a history lesson! Ultimately, the reason that the city of Metru Nui was abandoned was because Mata Nui WAS awake, watching over them all, but then Makuta forced him into slumber and essentially caused a cataclysm. The Matoran were rounded up and forced to sleep as well, and the Toa Metru had to flee the city. When they came back, it had been overrun with Visorak (basically giant spiders), and they had to fight hard to defeat the horde and its leaders and escape with all of the sleeping Matoran.

Once they left Metru Nui (and arrived on the island that would become Mata Nui), the Toa Metru sacrificed their powers to wake up all the Matoran - which is how they transformed into the wise old Turaga. Also, the Matoran woke up with no memories, which is how they’d never known about Metru Nui up until this point.

Anyways, after exploring Metru Nui and making plans to move back in, everyone does some digging around and discover something about Mata Nui: his spirit is fading. Whatever Makuta did to him, it not only put him to sleep, but it’s also slowly killing him. After presumably having an existential crisis, the gang come up with a solution: there’s another legendary mask, the Mask of Life, that should be able to resuscitate Mata Nui, or at the very least, keep him from kicking the bucket while he’s sleeping.

(The Mask of Life! If you look closely, you can see that the faceplate is shaped like a humanoid figure (because, yaknow, life) and if you think that’s not the tightest shit ever you can get out of my face)

So, the modern-day Toa (the Toa Nuva, if you guys remember the name) are like ‘okay, give us the location of the mask, we’ll go and find it’. So they get sent to another island, this one called Voya Nui, and they arrive and... get their asses handed to them? What?

A quick backtrack: a gang of thugs called the Piraka had already arrived on Voya Nui in search of the Mask of Life, wanting it so they can use its power to blackmail powerful organisations and generally get ahead in the criminal world. (From a Meta perspective, they’re,,, really interesting. Up until this point, the villains in Bionicle had either been wild animals, or villains with grand overarching plans. These guys are basically overpowered street thugs, complete with their own theme song - the ‘Piraka Rap’. Look it up on YouTube; it’s fucking hilarious, because the rest of Bionicle is generally timeless, but the Piraka Rap was basically dated as soon as it came out. I love it.)

(The Piraka themselves! Fun fact; in Bionicle lore, ‘Piraka’ is a slang term for ‘thief’ and ‘murderer’, and was also considered so vulgar that if a Matoran called another Matoran ‘Piraka’, war would be declared over it. These guys are really just going around calling themselves slurs. I have to respect that.)

So, yeah. The Piraka defeat and imprison the Toa Nuva when they get to the island. Now what?

Well, now it’s time for the Matoran to get involved! A group of named and previously-established Matoran set out to see if they can rescue the Toa. There’s Jaller, Hahli, and Matoro, who I’ve already mentioned, and then there’s Kongu, Nuparu, and Hewkii. And I need to take a break to say that all these characters have been with the story since 2001 (it’s now 2006), and they’ve all contributed to the plot before!! Kongu is a prominent Matoran from the air village who led a flight of giant bird-riders to save the day one time, and Nuparu is an engineer from the earth village who basically invented mechs to help the Matoran defend themselves against the Bohrok. These guys are BADASSES and I want to bring up how a really strong initial 3 years of storytelling laid a great foundation for so many small characters. It’s just neat! :D

Anyways, these Matoran travel to the island of Voya Nui in canisters (like how the original Toa landed on Mata Nui) and while they’re sailing the ocean blue, their canisters are struck by lighting from the mysterious Red Star. And that lighting, say it with me now, TRANSFORMS them! Specifically it transforms them into Toa. They end up calling themselves the Toa Inika, because they’re searching for the mask of life, which is also called the ‘Ignika’.

(The Toa Inika. Being transformed by a bolt of lighting means that in addition to their regular elemental powers, they also have electric/lighting abilities.)

Souped-up and ready for action, the Toa Inika manage to defeat the Piraka and rescue the Toa Nuva. However, through plot shenanagins, the Mask of Life ends up being sent to the bottom of the ocean around Voya Nui, and the Toa Inika learn that under the waves is a hidden city - Mahri Nui. As they descend, the Mask of Life does something odd; it sends out a wave of energy, transforming the Toa Inika so that they can breath underwater. So now, they’re the Toa Mahri. (Because they’re headed to Mahri Nui. You get me?)

Mahri Nui is ruled by the Barraki - ancient warlords who were imprisoned under the sea many thousands of years ago after they became powerful enough to threaten Mata Nui himself. They were put in a prison called The Pit, but during the cataclysm caused by Makuta putting Mata Nui to sleep, the city of Mahri Nui sunk into the water and slammed into the Pit. Many prisoners and Matoran died, but the Barraki were freed. Uh-oh, spaghetti-ohs.

Speaking of Makuta - guess who’s back! Thought dead after no-one could find him after Takutanuva died, it turns out that his spirit is possessing a robot body that had previously been a prison guard. He spends some time hanging out with one of the Toa Mahri, Matoro, basically playing mind games with him and trying to get him to turn to the dark side. Eventually, three different characters and factions smack the shit out of him, and he slips out of the robot body to go do... something else (watch this space). 

This year of story was REALLY plot-heavy and I kinda can’t do it justice here. The important developments are that the Toa Mahri eventually manage to reclaim the Mask of Life, and Matoro yoinks it. While his teammates act as a big distraction, he swims away and puts on the mask. It basically grants him ultimate power, but it also fuckin’ kills him. His final acts are to teleport his friends to safety, and then release a massive burst of energy that burns him up and saves Mata Nui’s life. The Mask of Life, with no-one left to wear it, sinks into the ocean.

(“In his last moments, Matoro feels no fear. He know he has succeeded--the Toa Mahri are safe, able to resume their lives in Metru Nui. The Turaga and Matoran will know that they became true heroes. Matoro does not see himself as a hero. As a Matoran, a Toa Inika, and a Toa Mahri, all he ever tried to do was his duty. Now that duty has led him to his destiny.”- Bionicle Ignition 11: Death of a Hero)

[dries tears] Anyways, now that Mata Nui’s life has been saved, the only thing left to do is wake him back up. To do that, the Toa Nuva (the Toa that showed up at the very beginning of this story, if you recall) need to journey to the core of the universe, and a civilisation called Karda Nui. Three of the Toa Nuva - Lewa, Pohatu, and Kopaka - are sent to a village in the clouds, where they protect the local matoran and battle the forces of Makuta. Because, as it turns out, the big bad Makuta that we know? Makuta is actually the name of his species. The guy just wanted to feel special, apparently. The Makuta that the Toa have been fighting for over half a decade is technically called Makuta Teridax (or just Teridax), while the other Makuta have other names that I can’t remember off the top of my head.

Anyways, while those three Toa are figuring that out, the other three - Tahu, Gali, and Onua - journey to a place called the Swamp of Secrets in order to find a set of keystones that supposedly contain instructions on how to awaken Mata Nui. And it’s there that they find an unlikely ally: the Mask of Life itself.

See, the Mask of Life has always been a weird one - if you recall, it released an energy pulse for no reason that transformed the Toa Mahri and let them breath underwater. (It’s also done some other fucky stuff that I haven’t been able to mention - there’s a short story about how one time, a guy touched it, and it gave him the ability to involuntarily bring everything around him to life, which ultimately drove him mad. So. You know. That’s fun.) Well, it turns out that when the mask sank into the ocean after Matoro’s death, it ultimately ended up in the swamps of Karda Nui, and it senses the battles raging about it. More than that, but it remembers Matoro’s bravery as he donned the mask knowing it would kill him, and remembers how his final wish was to save his friends. Wanting to know what it means to be a hero, the Mask of Life creates a body for itself, and ventures out into the swamp to discover its destiny.

(The Mask of Life has a body now!! Good for him! Good for him.)

There’s some more shenanigans that I’m skipping over - at one point, Takanuva (Toa of light, remember him?) rocks up to help. Long story short, our eight heroes - Tahu, Gali, Onua, Lewa, Kopaka, Pohatu, Takanuva, and the Mask of Life - fight their way through the Makuta and into the very core of the universe - the Codrex. Inside, after yet more shenanigans, the Mask of Life figures that in order to wake Mata Nui up, it will have to sacrifice the body it’s built for itself. The moment is sad, but the mask remembers Matoro’s sacrifice, and is inspired to act. He sacrifices his dreams of becoming a hero, and in doing so, becomes a hero... ;_;

The mask flies deep into the Codrex, its body dissolving; when it reaches the bottom, it creates a massive energy storm that the other characters have to escape. (Our heroes make it out - most of the villains end up getting vaporized, big RIP.)

And just like that, the journey is over. After years of battle, the Toa Nuva have completed their purpose, and awakened the great spirit, thus bringing peace back to the land. Everyone meets back up in Metru Nui - the Toa Nuva, the Toa Mahri, the Turaga, the remaining Matoran. It’s a glorious day. And as they gather, something happens.

Deep, deep beneath the ocean, energy pulses through rock, and machines that have been dormant for millennia begin to whirr and move. The island of Mata Nui - long abandoned as the Matoran moved back down into Metru Nui - cracks open like a wallnut, each half sliding into the sea. From underneath where the island had been, a tremendous head rises out of the ocean, countless galleons of water pouring off of it. Titanic shoulders follow. Then the chest, and the limbs, and slowly, surely, Mata Nui rises.

Meta context: for years, the nature of Mata Nui has been a mystery. Is he a metaphysical being? Is he a real person? No-one was sure... but they know now. That solid material that the earth Matoran couldn’t mine through, all the way back in 2001? That was his skin. The mysterious red star that created the Toa Inika? That was a failsafe machine orbiting Mata Nui, poised to create new Toa as necessary. The island of Mata Nui was atop his head, Metru Nui was his brain, Karda Nui was deep in his guts. The Matoran were workers to keep him functioning, the Toa were basically his immune system (the canisters they arrive in are literally shaped like pills)... All this time, all these stories, all these characters, this entire world - they have all been inside a robot the size of continents.

(Fucking hell. Look at this. The clouds come up to his ankles.)

Celebrations ripple through Metru Nui as everyone realises what has happened. The great spirit is awake again! The Toa have won! But as the Turaga raise their voices to try and congratulate the Toa, a chill spreads over the spectators as the air grows cold. Everyone stops and looks around. What’s happening now? And then, from everywhere and nowhere, a voice rumbles. It’s a familiar voice. An unwelcome voice. A voice that most of the gathered heroes thought they’d never hear again.

It’s the voice of Makuta - the original Makuta. Makuta Teridax.

And what does he say?

“I AM EVERYWHERE. I AM EVERYTHING YOU SEE.”

Matoro’s sacrifice had ensured that Mata Nui’s body did not die, but before the great spirit’s consciousness could return, Makuta supplanted it with his own. After that, all he had to do was wait for the Toa Nuva to achieve their objective. And as they finished the fight and won the day, they handed victory to him on a silver platter. No longer does he need to strive to rule the universe - he is the universe.

(Meta perspective again but like: FUCK, man. I can’t emphasise enough how mind-breaking this was for the kids who were invested in the series. Think Thanos snapping his fingers in Infinity War, except probably more devastating, because there wasn’t a direct sequel lined up to give the heroes another chance, and there wasn’t a way to ‘undo’ it. This was a plot development that we all had to live with T_T)

(You can tell things are bad because his eyes changed from green to red.)

And what of Mata Nui? What about the spirit that the Toa were actually trying to wake up?

Oh, Makuta stuffed Mata Nui’s consciousness into the Mask of Life - and then blasted the Mask into space.

[inhales deeply]

man...

Okay, in all honesty, part of me wanted to end it there. But you know what? We’ve come this far. And there is more to the story. So I’m going to ignore my concern I won’t be able to do it justice and blunder on.

 Bionicle’s last chapter (2009-2010) follows Mata Nui himself - no longer an abstract spiritual concept, but rather a concrete character. A god felled from his pedestal, struggling to find a way to save his people. And it’s AWESOME. Armed with only the Mask of Life and a sentient shield named Click, he wanders the shithole deserts of the planet he crash-lands on, bringing the disparate tribes together, uncovering secrets about who made him and what his ultimate purpose is, and learning what it means to be a regular person. Also, at one point, in a move very reminiscent of the god that he once was, he turns a guy into a snake. You know. As a ‘fuck you’.

(There’s something really cool to me about a main character being someone who essentially lost all the power of the cosmos. Mata Nui might just be my fave character in this whole story honestly.)

Eventually, Mata Nui discovers some crucial pieces of information. Firstly: the planet that he’s landed on, Bara Magna, is his ‘homeworld’ in that it’s where his giant god body was built. Secondly: the two moons orbiting Bara Magna (the jungle moon of Bota Magna and the ocean moon of Aqua Magna) were once part of the planet itself, and split off during a planet-destroying cataclysm, leaving behind a desert wasteland in their wake. Third: the function he was ultimately built for (his ‘destiny’) was to reunite the three celestial bodies into one planet, bringing life back to Bara Magna’s harsh desert environments. He was on his way to complete this task when Makuta crashed his systems with a computer virus - which was what forced him into the ‘slumber’ that he was in for most of the mainline story.

His fourth, and probably most important discovery, is that he’s essentially his makers’ second attempt at a world-fixing giant robot. Before creating him, his makers (the ‘Great Builders’) constructed a giant robot that malfunctioned and exploded. Long-deactivated, the pieces of it are still scattered through the deserts of Bara Magna - in fact, many of the villages on the planet are set up in or around these giant robot pieces. Mata Nui figures that if he can reconstruct this old robot, he can use it to complete his destiny, and maybe even save his people.

It isn’t easy. He has to convince the villagers he’s come to befriend (the Agori) to give up their homes and their safety, and he has to find an experimental power source that’ll actually get the giant metal body moving again. But eventually, he figures it all out. Powered by the experimental source, the Mask of Life, and probably also friendship, he inhabits this enormous form and rises once again. Without missing a beat, he reaches out and begins to pull the moons towards the main planet. As far as he’s concerned, he’s going to fix everything, or die trying.

(The power of skybeams)

However, it won’t be that simple. Makuta senses that Mata Nui’s spirit has inhabited a new form (and I don’t mean that in a metaphysical way, I mean that in a computer/technology way), and he quickly jets over to Bara Magna. Obviously, flinging the fucker into space wasn’t good enough. It’s time for him to destroy Mata Nui, mano y mano. Giant robot y giant robot.

(Makuta and Mata Nui, facing off. God I love this picture.)

It’s the final battle - for real this time. The two giant robots begin to punch each other, and Mata Nui is up against some obvious disadvantages. For one thing, he can’t risk attacking Makuta with all his might, because he doesn’t want to hurt his people, who are still inside the giant robot. (Inside, they’re fairing... poorly. It’s like facism, but if facism was being actively enforced by God.)

In the fight, a hole gets blasted in Makuta’s body, and out pour a whole LOAD of Rahkshi. (Remember those guys?) However, Tahu and Takanuva also manage to escape, and join a ground battle that’s breaking out between the Agori (and their protectors, the Glatorians), the Skrall (a tribe of warriors native to Bara Magna who are absolute dicks - I’ve had to gloss over them, unfortunately, but believe me when I say that they’ve been major antagonists for as long as the narrative has focused on Bara Magna), and a bunch of guys who are called ‘Piraka’ but aren’t the gang of thugs from Voya Nui. (I think they’re the same... species?) Long story short: large-scale shitfight is happening at the feet of the two robots that are slugging it out. Makuta, being a dick, decides to try and literally stamp on all of Mata Nui’s friends down below, and Mata Nui has to desperately hold him off.

Around this point, the Mask of Life (which is really the MVP of this whole story) uses its convenient energy bursts to imbue Tahu with a set of golden armour that allows him to release energy blasts of its own. (Why it singles out Tahu, I’m not sure, but I’m presuming it’s because Tahu was the first face of the series and it just makes thematic sense for him to be a major player in the final battle.) Tahu uses his new golden armour to disintegrate ALL of the Rahkshi - and there were a lot of them on the field of battle, let me assure you. Makuta feels the loss of so many creations at once, and falters, and Mata Nui seizes his chance. He’d done his work well before Makuta had arrived, and the jungle moon is now in low orbit above the planet. Pouring every last ounce of his strength into one more push, he surges forward and up, pushing Makuta up and making sure that his head is right in the path of the falling planet.

Crunch.

(Kudos to Makuta Teridax for being such a persistent antagonist that the only way to get rid of him for good was to drop an entire damn planet on his head.)

Mata Nui guides the falling body carefully to the ground, letting it open and freeing his people. The remaining Skrall and Piraka surrender. The Matoran and Toa meet and mingle with the Agori and Glatorian. Mata Nui raises his hands, and completes his purpose; aided one last time by the Mask of Life, as well as his body’s innate systems, he enacts a synthesis on the now-united celestial bodies. Lush forests and large bodies of water appear in the desert. Life flourishes. Birds probably start to sing. Mata Nui has completed his purpose, and vindicated all of the heroes who fought for him for so long.

He feels himself fading. He lets his spirit withdraw into the Mask of Life. A new slumber - this one, earned, and of his own volition.

Perhaps one day, he will return.

(“We will honour Mata Nui, and all those who fought for him, in our memories. But the time has come to move on. His destiny is fulfilled, and for many of us, it has yet to be written. My friends, it is time to go.”- Tahu, The Mata Nui Saga, chapter 34.)

And there we go! Very, VERY long, but that’s the general plot of bionicle. There are an absolute tone of details I’ve missed out or skipped over, and I encourage you to search them out for yourself if you’re interested. But them’s the basics! :D

[potteresque-ire]

hello, ily metas! thank you for taking the time for them. i hope you dont mind an ask with two follow up questions to your metas i'm curious about: 1) has mxtx rly been sentenced? i have seen others also share this news but other fans have quickly dismissed and gotten pissed at these reports for being fake news that are bad for mxtx, and as fearmongering. 2) for those who want to support yizhan but not the ccp, do you have advice how to navigate fan support and interaction with their media?

Hello! I apologise for the late reply!  You’ve brought up some interesting points, so please forgive me for responding with an essay.

First, about MXTX — This is a follow-up to this post.

Unfortunately, this is all we got—all everyone has got about MXTX’s current situation: on 2020/11/10, she was sentenced in Hangzhou Shang Cheng District’s People’s Court (杭州市上城區人民法院). No details were given on her verdict, due to “人民法院認為不宜在互聯網公布的其它情形”  (“The People’s Court decided it inappropriate to announce further details on the internet”). Here’s a link with the screenshot that showed all the information released about the case that day.

There are enough copies of similar screenshots to this one online, with the differences dependent on where the publisher pulled the information from the same website: 中國裁判文書網, an online archive of verdicts run by China Supreme People’s Court. There’re few reasons, therefore, to believe the information on the screenshot was fake. The link I used was Sina’s Financial News, which I believe is trustworthy enough for China’s standard.

It is also important to note, of course, that two scenarios may still render this screenshot irrelevant. 1) The verdict, which was not mentioned in the screenshot, was “not guilty” and 2) the name listed in the case, 袁依楣, was not MXTX at all.

Few have seemed to suspect 2) to be a possibility. Her real name might have been prior knowledge among some fans, or the combination of her surname and city of residence. 1) has been the where the concern / debate is.

I included China’s rate of conviction in the original post for this reason: acquittal is exceedingly rare (<0.1%) for the arrested in China. This short article discussed some reasons.

So, is it possible that MXTX is now a free woman? Yes. Is it likely? Not at all.

Still, since the probability that MXTX is imprisoned isn’t 100%, is spreading this news smearing her name? Fear-mongering?

I can only answer for myself, Anon, but my answer is no for both questions, which is why I’ve felt comfortable posting about her case. MXTX’s alleged “crimes” are things we already knew she did, or common practices among Chinese IP writers. We know she penned MDZS and other BL works; we know MDZS, in particular, has an 18+ element. She was said to have sold merch based on her works, but that wasn’t unusual at all for writers in Jinjiang, where she published her writing. Even those who don’t like her have seemed to agree that it was her writing that got her into trouble, not some other crimes she could’ve committed.

IMO, a guilty verdict doesn’t tell us as much about her as it does about the judicial system, the business practices of her country. It’s worth re-mentioning that media giants such as Tencent are closely tied to the government; Tencent’s WeChat, for example, is part of China’s Great Firewall and is used for surveillance, for censorship and removal of political dissidents. What MXTX’s case hints at is this: the government has (very likely) convicted her, while its close allies are continuing to use her works—works that got her into legal trouble in the first place—to make money. Some fans of MXTX have questioned if the courts have censored the details of the case to save the embarrassment of the rich and powerful, calling what has happened to MXTX 人血饅頭 (“human blood steamed buns”), an idiom used to describe the act of profiting out of someone elses’ life.

As for fear-mongering, here are my thoughts ~ it would’ve been fear-mongering if the public has access to the facts, and not years after they happen. Specifically, it would’ve been fear-mongering to leak the rumours of MXTX’s sentencing, when the judicial system is transparent and the case details will soon be published for all to see. Why? Because “fear” comes from the unknown, and “-monger” is the unnecessary promotion, stirring-up of this fear.

To promote, stir up anything, one needs a reference level. The reference level in this scenario is this: what is the level of fear if the facts about MXTX’s (and other BL writers’) situation are known? Of course, this knowledge doesn’t make MXTX’s experience any easier or more just; it doesn’t cause her less fear. However, she isn’t the target audience of this likely-to-be-true rumour. The target audience is the public and in particular, those who consume and/or generate BL material online.

What is the level of fear among this population if the facts about MXTX’s (and other BL writers’) situation are known? It’s the (relative) comfort in knowing the government’s stance on what they do: how the administration feels about BL, 18+ BL, and their distribution methods. The comfort comes from having the right information to decide how to act accordingly. For example, if I’m a BL writer based in China and I know the court has found MXTX guilty of bypassing publishing houses but not of writing M/M romance, then I’ll know to not produce paper versions of my writing, but I can keep writing.

This reference level of fear is unavailable here, however, since the government has decided to withhold all details about the case. Without this reference level, fear-mongering becomes a ... difficult to define concept.

Are these likely-to-be-true rumours agents of fear, or are they hints on how to survive in a country that lacks transparency?

Continuing with the example of I being a Chinese BL writer, since I cannot expect to hear more facts about MXTX, this rumour is all I’ve got in choosing what to do with my hobby, in deciding whether it is safe to continue. As I’m aware that a rumour isn’t a fact, I first research on the rumour’s likelihood of truth (similar to what I’ve done for MXTX’s case), and cross my fingers that I don’t get it wrong.

By doing so, I’m turning these rumours into my survival guide.

Is it risky? Yes. Is it exhausting? Absolutely. But this is the way of life for people who live under secretive, authoritarian governments—the authoritarian element making it impossible to demand more facts. It may take people outside such regimes some time to get used to—to the lifestyle, and to the idea that, in a place where news is often synonymous with propaganda, rumours are breadcrumbs of truth that should be sieved through with equal care as one would sieve through the news. Heeding, considering the probable truth of what the authority has deemed to be fear-mongering rumours can be a matter of literal life and death. 

Take...COVID. (I apologize for bringing up this unpleasant topic!)

I shall link to an article about the early spread of COVID in Wuhan here and ask: were Dr. Li Wenliang and the seven other doctors fear-mongering? Wuhanese chose to believe in the government, but at what cost to them? What would the world be like today if they took the early COVID rumours as true and masked up like Hong Kongers—Hong Kongers who weren’t any smarter or better, but had simply learned their painful lessons from the 2003 SARS epidemic? 

(Why hadn’t the Wuhanese learned? Because the government has long changed the narrative of SARS, taught their people that the illness originated in Hong Kong.) 

(How can one learn from past mistakes if one pretends those mistakes never existed?)

You must be wondering, Anon, why I’m talking about COVID when your next question is about YiZhan. The death of Dr Li Wenliang on February 7th, 2020, sparked a demand for freedom of speech rarely seen in internet-age China. Its fury, its ferocity forced the government to change its stance on Dr Li, again an unusual move. Since January 2020, Weibo had been censoring COVID news and opinion pieces that shedded a negative light to the central government; after the death of Dr Li, the censorship apparatus stepped up, making way for the propaganda machine to kick in later and change the narrative of the pandemic.

Here are some questions without definite answers, but may be food for thought for YiZhan fans:

1) While the Chinese government’s censorship apparatus (including Weibo) might have silenced the voices of dissent, of mourning on the surface, was it more likely to pacify, or fuel the anger of netizens, many of whom had lost loved ones, many of whom were still under quarantine?

2) Less than three weeks after the death of Dr Li, a group of fans demanded even *more* censorship from the government—the closing of an internet website that had been seen as a relatively free space to express oneself. How would these netizens react, even though they knew little about these fans or their idol?  

(It was, in the context of the massive silencing of COVID discussions in China, that I learned about the ban of AO3. There had been rumours that the government would censor more websites on 2020/03/01. When I read about AO3′s ban on 2/27, my thoughts were 1) Hmm. This came two days early. 2) AO3? Really?)

(I wouldn’t watch The Untamed or know who Gg was until several months later.)

Now, Anon, this is a good time to get to your CCP (Chinese Communist Party) question.

The very short answer is no. There’s no way to support YiZhan without, to a certain level, supporting the CCP. As mentioned above, the media companies are all part of China’s surveillance system. Weibo is where freedom of speech is curbed. Our two boys have been part of the propaganda machine; the BBC article linked above had a tiny picture of Gg on it, as he was a performer in the Hero in Harm’s Way (最美逆行者), a “real-life based” drama on COVID. DD just did a show glorying the Chinese police force (and here’s a video of the same force welding doors to lock in COVID-stricken residents).

Nonetheless, here’s my first advice: please do not beat yourself up for supporting YiZhan!

Gg and Dd are people who live within the system, inside the Great Firewall. They understand the world the way their government has taught them to—not only in school, but also in the news and media. Like most youths in every country, they’re patriotic—and to expect them to be otherwise, especially because of information they don’t have, is both unrealistic and unfair. Even if they do know about certain things impermissible within the Firewall, in China (as in many Communists countries), openly expressing / performing one’s proper political leanings (ie. loyalty towards CCP) is among the most important pre-requisites for any job. This has been especially true for c-ent in recent years .

They, like most of their countrymen, are doing what they have to do.

In this case, it comes to us, our decisions on how to interact with their works. How should we deal with them, their propaganda elements?

The answer, of course, varies from person to person. Personally, I’ve chosen the approaches of “immunisation” and “restriction”. By “immunisation”, I mean learning about as much historical and sociopolitical facts from non-CCP sponsored sources; this is understandably difficult for someone who doesn’t already have some familiarity with the culture and politics of the region, and/or cannot read the language. 

Restriction means limiting my consumption of media produced by China. I avoid shows (dramas, documentaries, variety etc) featuring topics that are likely to contain heavy propaganda, such as the military, the police, Hong Kong/Macao/Taiwan, and of course, anything pertaining to the CCP, from its rise to its governance of the country.

In general, I’m wary of all information presented about the post-monarchy years (post 1911), even though CCP wouldn’t begin its reign until after WWII (1949). Why so early? 1) Because CCP was formed in 1921 and so its glorification requires a change of narrative since then; 2) because the Nationalist Party (Kuomintang, KMT), which governed China between 1912 and 1949 (the so-called Republican Era 民國), would end up exiling to and setting up a new government in Taiwan.

How much propaganda should one expect in shows depicting the country post-1911? The current TV and webdrama directives (previously discussed in this post) offer some hints. Here are my translations of the relevant items:

D7) Dramas about the Republican era: Glorification of the Republican Era, the Beiyang Government, and Warlord Era requires strict control.

D10) Crime drama: crime drama is the focus of content auditing. The Ministry of Public Security (Pie note: in charge of law enforcement, ie, police) will be involved in the audit. The process of crime solving cannot be exposed; criminal psychology and motivations can however be depicted in detail. Undercover police cannot use drugs or kill, or damage the image of the police force. Criminals must be punished by law.

D12) Dramas featuring realistic topics: realistic topics must adhere to the correct world view, philosophy of life and moral values. They cannot place too strong an emphasis on social conflicts, must showcase the beautiful lives of the commoners. Regular folks should display larger-than-life sentiments and aspirations; they can pursue wealth, but must use proper means to do so; they cannot damage the public image of specific employment types, groups and social organisations. Do not preach negative or decadent world view, philosophy of life and moral values. Do not exaggerate, amplify social issues; do not over showcase, display the darker sides of society; do not preach affluence, avoid things that have no basis in real life.

D16) Dramas featuring the Revolution (Pie note: CCP’s coming to power): 2019 is the publicity period of the 70th Anniversary of the People’s Republic of China. Although the “Three Importances” (important revolution, important people, important events) are still encouraged, the  National Radio and Television Administration requires all departments, at all levels, to strengthen the control of content and the overall management of the industry, and focus on the auditing of content pertaining to the Sino-Japanese war and espionage dramas.

These directives (as those translated in the other post) are as vague as they are restrictive, and to err on the side of caution, production companies tend to “overachieve” to avoid going against headwinds at the censorship board. This means their products have a tendency to malign the Republican Era (D7). It means they will likely twist history in trying to depict the CCP as faultless heroes (D16). It means they'll probably present a utopian-like society and call it reality-based (D12), a society in which the good guys share the same values as the CCP and always win (D10).

Yes, my “restriction” means I skipped Hero in Harm’s Way. It means I’ve never listened to Gg’s version of 我和我的祖國 despite my absolute adoration of his voice. It means I just missed Dd’s performance in the law enforcement celebration event. It means I don’t plan on watching Being A Hero and Ace Troops.

So here’s where I’ve drawn the line, Anon, but it doesn’t mean that’s what anyone should do. Only you alone can decide where your own comfort zone is. I write these metas in the hopes that it can offer a … gateway for those who’d like to understand, with a more telescopic lens, Gg and Dd’s country—a country that holds a particularly strong hold over its citizens’ fate including, yes, their romantic fate. It’s not my wish to impose my opinions on anyone.

If I have other hopes… It’s this. Please, as long as it’s safe for you to talk, do not self-censor—especially about facts, especially on sites like Tumblr or Twitter that have long been banned by the Chinese government. I don’t mean one should go about and confront those who insist on a different version of reality. To undo opinions rooted in years of education, IMO, the process has to be voluntary, and the information is already at the fingertips of those who’re surfing these sites and wish to learn more. More importantly, open discussions of these topics may be risky for those who still have close ties to China, and keeping them safe should always be the top priority. 

What I mean is simply this ~ please do not feel obliged to agree with every perspective presented in YiZhan’s work just because you support the leads. Please do not feel you must remain silent about the CCP—its good, bad and ugly—just because your favourite stars happen to come from the country it’s ruling. And please remember: “Chinese”, as a term, has always included people who live outside CCP’s control, many of whom still fully embrace the culture, traditions and values of Historical China, a 5000-years long string of dynasties with shifting borders, ethnic makeup and customs. The Untamed is a mainland Chinese production, yes, but its genre, its manner of presenting certain traditions, wouldn’t have been developed, or flourished, without the diaspora. The CCP has only been the ruling party of one country, the People’s Republic of China, for 71 years, and as a party with foreign (soviet) roots and a record of destroying the pillar of the country’s tradition, Confucianism, it doesn’t own a monopolistic say on how every Chinese should think and act—no matter how much it insists it does—or how everyone should think and speak about China and its people.

It isn’t qualified.

[zukosgay]

I see you posting about horror and I would love some recs if you have some to share 🙏

i just accidentally deleted a whole list fjahsjdasd i hate my life. anyways, i’m just gonna go ahead and assume you know the classics that get recommended all the time (the babadook, the ring, the exorcist, the vvitch, the conjuring, hereditary, the thing, insidious, etc.). here’s some underrated/indie horror movies i rarely see talked about (favs are in italics):

The not-actually-that-scary-but-still-good horror movies:

Let The Right One In (2008) – I mean, it’s literally my favorite movie/book and I have a tattoo of it, we been knew

Possum (2018) – I cannot even begin to tell you how much I adore this movie. Horror movies about CSA that explore it without once showing the actual rape, but still being terrifying/disturbing nonetheless?? Just an irish guy chilling with the puppet personification of his csa trauma????? Hells yeah (huge TW for spiders tho, i mean. I’m not scared of spiders but that fucking puppet is stil terrifying no matter how much I look at it)

Hard Candy has a soft spot in my heart. That’s my emotional support „ellen page tortures pedophiles“ movie

Thirst (2009)

Ravenous (1999) THE INHERENT ROMANTICISM OF BEING GAY AND CANNIBALS ON A MOUNTAIN. Brokeback mountain for cannibals

We Are What We Are (2010)

Marrowbone (2017)

The transfiguration (2016) – there’s so little vampire stories with black people, and i really loved how this wasn’t outright fantasy horror but had more of a ‚vampirism as an actual mental illness‘ approach

Nightbreed (1990) this movie IS lgbt cinema history

Gerald’s Game (2017) – we get it elena you love horror movies about the trauma of CSA

The autopsy of jane doe (2017) - i feel like this movie is perfect for horror fans who are tentative about seeing any big grotesque/gorey jumpscares 

As Above, So Below (2014) (the first and so far only movie that got permission to film in the paris catacombs) (also good for starters)

The Actually-Scary (at least to me) movies:

Lake Mungo (2008) ((think of TMA’s The End)) (i deadass think about this movie so often, the story is so devastating and really stays in my head. also the bg ghosts)

The [REC] franchise!!! any of those movies fuck me up and are TERRIFYING (again ff) 

I watched 30 Days of Night (2007) when it came out, when i was way too young, and it still to this day holds the spot for coolest vampire design (they modelled them after the jaws of white sharks!!! They’re supposed to be slavic strigoi) and also one of the only one times where i was actually scared by vampires

Livid (2011) (french horror movie!) (v gorey)

The Taking of Deborah Logan (2014) (found footage of a demonic mom – you’ll see a lot of FF on this list cuz i think it’s criminally underrated and terrifying if done well)

NOROI: The Curse (2005) ((ff))

Open water (2003) (this is scary to me because it’s based on a true story about a couple who went cave diving in the ocean with a guide who got LEFT BEHIND in the middle of the motherfucking ocean – with literally nothing to hold onto and no one even reporting them missing. Also, after i watched this i did a lil research and turns out there’s quite a lot of people ‚going missing‘ while taking swimming lessons where the guides will just drive to shore without them YEARLY. Fucked up if true) ((this has tma the vast vibes))

Clown (2014) (I recommend this to people who aren’t scared to like Eli Roth movies and think It Chap. 1 was boring)

Martyrs (2008) – a classic, this movie is bound to disturb you. It’s about child abuse and the survivors of child abuse enacting revenge, though it’s not the typical csa/anything similiar. HUGE tw for uhhhh, torture, self harm, mutilation etc..

Mama (2008) – the goth tattooed rocker chic jessica chastain movie

The bay (2012) (ff)

The last exorcism (2010) (ff)

The wailing (2016)

If you put on any V/H/S movie for me I’m guaranteed to shit my pants, so there’s that

May (2002) – i turned lesbophobic after watching this movie. About a lesbian obsessed with dolls i’ll say nothing more

The not-as-scary-but-still-scary-so-i-dont-wanna-put-them-in-the-first-list-in-case-i-traumatize-anyone movies:

Creep 1 & 2

The Strangers

The void (2016) ((tma the spiral))

The Hallow (2015)

The loved ones (2009) – a classic

Excision (2012) (if you liked raw)

Devil’s pass (2013)

Afflicted (2013) ((ff))

The cell (2000)

Session 9 (2001)

They Look Like People (2015)

The children (2008) – fuck them KIDS

The blackcoat’s daughter (2015)

I really liked Armie Hammer’s netflix original Wounds (2019)? IDK why. I found the story (albeit better suited as a short story) fascinating

Night Eats The World (2018) – another french movie! This time it’s about the inherent isolation and loneliness in locking yourself in a parisian apartment all alone with a bunch of zombies eating the rest of the world

Pontypool (2008)

The lure (2015) – yes, we’re polish, yes, we’re mermaids, yes, we eat men, yes, we also perform in a pop girl group WE EXIST!

I am not a serial killer (2016)

Green room (2015)

That’s it, pretty much. 

[sienablackwood]

Well I gotta deliver at one point or another. Needed a bit to think about those (and about my uni essay). So thank you for tagging me @drippinlou

I tend to take my music taste too serious 🤣 so sorry beforehand. This might as well be hilarious.

1. What’s the first song you remember hearing?

Dragostea din tei - O-Zone

It was the year 2003 and this was played over and over again on the radio. So my kindergarten teacher let our group create a choreography to present at the annual summer get-together in front of our parents.

2. What’s the first band you got into?

Probably I should say Led Zeppelin or Metallica. My dad was a big fan and when he drove me somewhere we would headbang in the car and he told me all about the concerts he's been to and who was playing which instrument and from which drug addiction they where suffering.

My first band Obsession was 5 Seconds of summer. I wasn't a Directioner, I was one of the cool edgy kids I listened to 'punk rock'. No, I seriously felt like I'm definitely not like other girls.

3. Do you collect physical music?

No, usually I don't. I own a few albums only because I like the cover artwork but my CD-Player broke a few years ago. I try to manage my possessions digitally as much as possible.

4. What is your favorite piece of music memorabilia?

A Rock am Ring 1994 Festival memorial shirt. I of course was born 1999. It was my dad's shirt he gifted it to me when it didn't fit him anymore. My parents met at this festival so it's quite precious to me. My dad missed 'apparently' missed Rammstein because of her (I checked, Rammstein didn't play that year)

5. What’s your favorite concert that you’ve been to?

It's quite embarrassing but I've never been to a concert yet. When I discovered my genre of music the pandemic hit and before that I was never so much into a artist that I considered going to a concert.

6. If you could see any artist that’s no longer alive in concert, who would it be?

I mean of course the Beatles, who wouldn't like to see the beatles. But technically some of those bands are still touring but I would have liked to see AC/DC, Deep Purple and the Rolling Stones in the original lineup. I mean the seeing Michael Jackson or Amy Whinehouse would have been nice too. But most of the artists that I actively listen too are still in the business.

7. Have you met any musicians?

No. And I don't really aspire too. I saw a German Pop-Singer once in a restaurant, and even through I did listen to his music at the time I would never go up to them because of privacy reasons. I can fangirl online I don't have to bring that up to them.

8. What’s your go-to album when you’re feeling sad?

The 'Recovery'-Album from Eminem. It throws me back into my teenage self who had - compared to me now - very different problems and I've overcome them and that kinda means I will overcome the recent ones too. And I hate being sad, so getting into an angy mood sometimes is better than crying in the corner.

9. What’s your go-to album when you’re feeling happy?

I don't have an album but I've got a "sing along in the car"-Playlist with cringe euro dance stuff. Or my "Barbecue with Daddy"-Playlist with classic rock and old school metal.

10. What is one music documentary that you love?

Does "The Dirt" the Mötley Crüe Biopic count? I'm not overly into documentarys. I did like 'Rocketman' too and the festival documentaries of the Wacken Open Air.

11. What is one concert DVD that you love?

I dont own a single one. If I watch something on TV I'm gonna go for a movie.

12. Do you prefer listening to playlists or albums?

Definitely Playlists. The music needs to fit my mood. If it changes theme suddenly I get aggravated.

13. Do you listen to albums in order or on shuffle?

If I do listen to albums I don't care about the order - usually. Except if it's like one of those concept albums where the order really matters to tie together some story (like Wretched and Divine: The Story of the Wild Ones by BVB - I love this album. Its teenage wanna-be-emo Toni in a nutshell) but I at least listen to any album in order once to determine if I should keep it that way.

14. What is your favorite deep cut song by your favorite artist?

I change favorite artists so often... and favorite songs too. But my all time go-to is probably "Breath of Life" by Florence and the Machine. I love this song. I can dance my heart out to it or cry in my bed.

Tags are open, y'all!

[ap-sadistics]

of all the things i expected u to get into rottmnt wasn't one of them, but it's real cute.

ROTTMNT IS A REAL GOOD SHOW AND I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT FOR FREE SERITONIN 

ok now that thats out of my system ive actually always been a turtle fan!! since childhood!! i watched the 2003 series on saturday mornings in elementary school and man. im pretty sure that show had the Stuff that i enjoyed very much as a baby sadist before i even knew what a sadist was. shit was formative. although i dont remember much of the show now it still made me love tmnt till today and also i watched the 2012 series but i dropped off at some point and dont remember it too well also. but ye turtles ive always been here

but like to talk about how i actually got into rottmnt is like. typical jem bullshit behavior. the bullshit is that it was entirely fanfic motivated jhbthgrejkfhr. i was going insane. i was going made because i had nothing to fucking READ bc i had completely drained the promptos fat ao3 tag (which is a feat) and lost most of my interest in reading for him and my current fandom at the time (tales of hearts) has literally FOURTEEN (14) FICS TOTAL. I WAS GOING CRAZY ON TWITTER WHERE ACTUALLY 100% OF MY TALKING ABOUT FIC VOMIT GOES. i was like. man do i resort to reading batman fanfiction bc fic author i liked wrote for it. but then i was like.... hang on.... tmnt............. what if i revisit it after years................ then started reading fic...... some were rottmnt........ i watched clips on youtube..... it looked really FUCKING GOOD. and it was all over from there.

really tho the animation is fucking amaaaaazing and aaaaahh. the comedy is well written too. good lighthearted show thats so visually stimulating.... anyways this is a very long response to something that wasnt even a question. im hooked. rottmnt is a genuinely wonderful show. im not done with season 1 yet tho because ives been so fucking busy with art school...... but watching one ep every so often actually keeps me sane during these trying times. this is the most paced out ive ever watched a show. bc i dont have the time to binge it all at once. i wish i could tho. and i wish i could binge it twice in a row so i can look for my fav leo smug face to potentially make an icon. dont have the time for that tho unfortunately. anyways. i love these turtles. they are such good fucking boys this series and im love and they are all my sons

[star-anise]

I think I am having vicarious stress about how immagrint families are being treated at the American border too. Also other horrors happening in America though I live in Canada. How do you cope with that? If this question is annoying or personal you dont have to answer. Is it weird to feel post election stress after the 2016 election although I am not American? I heard American college kids had almost ptsd levels of trauamtic stress after the election in America.

It’s funny, today I was on the phone with a grad school friend who does front-line crisis mental health work in the USA, and grew up being heavily involved in the Democratic Party. She said, “I have such an issue with this rhetoric now, like, ‘don’t look away.’ Bitch, I haven’t looked away for two years. I’m fucking exhausted.” Because things like that are intended for the people who do look away, who are conservative and apathetic, but often they only reach an audience that is already engaged with the issue, and they land like hammers on people already trying their hardest.

And yes, freaking out about the shit that goes down in the USA is a fine old Canadian tradition. To quote Pierre Trudeau’s 1969 comments to the US president at the time: “Living next to you is in some ways like sleeping with an elephant. No matter how friendly and even-tempered is the beast, if I can call it that, one is affected by every twitch and grunt.”

(And Canadian politics are definitely negatively affected by the USA. My province just lost its NDP government because its Conservatives “aren’t as bad as those crazies down south!” and I have a sinking feeling the Cons will cakewalk to federal victory too in October)

You might also notice that on my blog, I post about political issues in only a small number of cases: 1) I have a unique observation I think needs to be added to the world, 2) It’s an issue I genuinely haven’t seen covered yet, and I know people who would want to know; 3) It’s a feel-good story meant to comfort people who are fighting the good fight; 4) It’s advertising an immediate, low-barrier thing people can do right away to directly affect the situation; 5) It’s a resource to help those fighters be better activists. And I do my best to always tag political posts with a standard set of tags to let people ignore them, so if somebody wants, they can follow me and just get my cats’n’fandom content.

The audience I usually have in mind when I blog are people like my friends: Smart, compassionate people committed to social activism, but without limitless amounts of money, health, time, or attention. Some of the people who follow my blog are DC lobbyists directly fighting the Trump administration’s policies. Some of them are crisis workers and EMTs and librarians and deal with the ragged edges of human existence in today’s society. I know I don’t have the nerves or capacity to be their news source; they can follow anyone else on Tumblr for that. So what I try to be is the friendly cat cafe they can go to at the end of a long shift to relax.

My response is really guided by a blog I followed a lot when 9/11 happened; I was following it to learn about getting published as a fantasy author, but its authors were New Yorkers and socialists and military veterans, and they had a lot to say about the false witch hunt for a justification for starting a war in Iraq in 2003 and the slow erosion of rights and freedoms of Americans and “enemy” POWs and the incredible damage the American war machine does when it gets going.

They’re not blogging as much now, but when Trump was elected, they released two posts that I found to be deeply useful:

Defense in Depth - Tl;dr: It is important that those of us in resistance to the world’s outrages don’t attack each other for having different priorities, because we need a diversity of targets and approaches.

Taking It Back - Tl;dr: Our enemies WANT us to be overwhelmed and horrified and frozen in shock and catatonic. That is a deliberate tactic they use. Whenever we seem to catch our breath, they create a new outrage for us to get upset over. We need to learn how to set our own pace, resist the lie that you have to be upset and horrified all the time, and focus on taking care of yourself.

I’m also really affected by Rebecca Solnit’s book “Hope in the Dark” where she points out that activist movements have two effects. The first is to influence whatever issue they’re actually agitating about. The second is to give people the tools and experience they need to become citizens who change their societies in deep and enduring ways.

One part of the problem is finding ways that you can make the world better that feel really concrete and achievable. That’s a whole other discussion, that depends a lot on what you’re good at, what your resources are, what you’re capable of. People feel a lot less terrified if there’s something they know they can do. 

But even once you’ve figured out how you’re fighting to make the world better in some small way, you probably can’t do it 24/7; you’ve got to keep mentally resilient the rest of the time.

So what do I do to cope?

I focus on easy-to-do, ordinary hobbies that bring me joy, especially ones that get me off my computer and out of my head. I garden; I just bought a bike; I’m getting my sewing room back in order so I can go back to making costumes and working on the @betterbinderproject.

I make sure I keep social connections where we can relax and enjoy each other. That means being codependent with my cat, babysitting my nieces and nephews, exploring my local bi/pan meetups, going to historical re-enactment events, texting with my friends about Tumblr drama, talking to my colleagues during slack moments at work, and enjoying the fandoms and fanworks that bring me joy.

I do my best to look after my physical wellbeing. Which for me means stretching, yoga, taking my psych meds and vitamins, taking painkillers, looking after my cuticles, using moisturizer, braiding my hair, getting massages, and always making sure there’s a cake in the kitchen. My emphasis isn’t whether I’ll get some disease 30 years from now; it’s making sure that inhabiting my body today is the least unpleasant that it has to be.

I try to look after myself; I go to therapy, look for jobs, keep up on my business paperwork, budget my money, work on upgrading my skills, and develop my 5-year plan. I work really hard on doing this without being stressed, because my habit of procrastinating and only getting around to this stuff when I’m in abject terror isn’t good.

I also, and this feels weird to say or suggest, try to educate myself on issues that are not the crisis du jour. I watch TV shows about the Russian revolution, listen to books about Indigenous language reclamation, read the diary of a World War II servicewoman. This isn’t an attempt to expand my list of crises to worry about, but because I find my ability to cope with the present immeasurably helped by knowing that people have faced other, different crises, and how they dealt with them. It’s… background research in resilience. With the added bonus that it helps me stay intersectional and aware of when we might be only seeing the most privileged part of a crisis situation.

[geothefafa]

top 5 bad movies you’ve watched 👀

this is very hard to answer because i have never watched a bad movie ever in  my life i have impeccable taste. i even looked up a list of top 50 worst movies and i have never seen a single one. so instead, ill share you what cursed movies i was obsessed with as a child and wouldnt recommend to anyone genuinely looking for something to watch.

5. Master of Disguise (2002)           its a movie about discovering your family history through the trials of grief and also meeting your mysterious and rude grandpa. its also about wearing many disguises to fool and dupe an evil mastermind played by brent spiner. (honestly, i stand by liking this movie as a kid. its really stupid and really encapsulated 2000′s humor.)

4. Fluke (1995)           its a movie about a shitty man who dies in a road rage accident and is reincarnated as a sweet puppy. this is a movie that depresses anyone who watches it except my childhood self, who was obsessed with this movie bc i wanted to become a puppy. i recently tried to rewatch this movie with my baby sister and i cried with quiet dignity. i dont know what was wrong with baby me who felt no sorrow.

3. Good Boy (2003)            its another dog movie but the dog is an alien. the dog talks. thats all you gotta know. its not the worst movie but i havent watched it since i was like 7 or 8. my taste in movies as a child was questionable and often upset my mother.

2. The Cat From Outer Space (1978)             i cant mention the dog from outer space without also mentioning the cat from outer space. so far this list has more animal movies than i expected but i guess i liked a lot of animal movies. i actually can't remember the plot to this movie at all, but i remember being obsessed with the cat's collar. when i looked up the plot online, i got confused by the description that makes it sound like the cat has a girlfriend. didnt remember that part.

so i mentioned a weird movie, two dog movies and a cat movie its time for the worst movie that i was obsessed with as a child.

1. Cats & Dogs (2001)              its another cat AND dog movie. they made a sequel for it i heard. didnt want to investigate really. they made a third movie also apparently. i wish i knew less. i dont stand by liking this movie, but unfortunately i remember almost the entire film scene by scene, i watched it that much. the worst movie ive ever seen. and i loved it. i loved it so much. it was a hard life before the internet and streaming on netflix.

thanks for the ask its opened my eyes to how many cursed animal movies ive watched growing up. also master of disguise is on this list somehow. also an animal movie if you count the turtle part i guess.