#i dont want to believe it still. but nobody has ever said anything normal about the situation

[chqnified]

Knowing someone is there and will give you an honest opinion of a situation and will protect you. Is all you'll ever need.

[nyx-is-missing]

SUNSET PART 1

Or early summer!

Clarisse La Rue x Cassandra De Young (oc! Apollo's kid)

Summary: When Cassandra gets involved in a scandal early in the day, she goes to camp early.

Warnings: men....thats all i could think of actualy.

First read this!

Part 2 is here!

Cassandra De Young

Im fucked.

That's it, that's all i can say.

I knew it as soon as my hand reached his face and stinged, as soon as i heard a camera's flash, and as soon as i stepped into my mom's apartment.

Let's just rewind a bit, okay?

My family own a big business, that you already know by now, the thing is, when they reeaally want to do business with someone they go extreme, the most common technique is to get on the good side of everyone in the family, everyone.

They research, pretend to have things in common, to like the same things, to have the same views of life, and to make it more believable they always go for the person who is closest in age with them.

Usually i dont get involved in this situations because im younger than everyone else, the only teen in the family.

The thing is, this family also had someone around my age.

A 18 year old guy.....eighteen.

Let me tell you, i really wasn't going for trouble today, i tought he may be a normal guy, just with a little money, someone i could have a conversation with, drink some coffe, laugh and go back home and think "hey, not so bad"

He.was.not.

All he could talk about is how much money his family had, where he went for winter break, his pure blood horse, that only ate (attention to this one) IMPORTED GRASS.

Overall a huge dick.

But that i could handle, i've met people like this, i could handle a shitty talk for some hours, what i could not handle was having to go through all this with his hand on my knee bellow the table.

And here i was, spending one of my last days of spring being tortured by the fates.

"You're not paying much attention to the conversation are you?" He said, and gods that accent was almost making me want to jump out of a cliff, or push him out of a cliff, both would work.

"Oh sorry i was-"

"No need to apologize, people get bored i know" Not that he did something criminal by not letting me finish my sentence but, my gods every action coming from him its making me want to die right now "Its okay, i could find some way to make you focus"

Okay, im done

"Im gonna need you to stop saying odd shit" I looked him dead in the eye with a bothered look, and by the surprised look he gave me back i was 100% sure nobody ever told him to shut up when he was saying nonsense.

"C'mon, dont be like that-" he said trying to get his hand a little but upwards, and i only realized i slapped him when i felt my hand burning.

"Oh my gods im sorry i-" And then i heard the camera flashes.

Im going to need you to imagine the scene, my hand was still up, his hand was till on his cheek, and he had a scared look in his face, as did most of the people at the fancy coffe shop.

Do i smile now? Strike a pose? This one is definetly getting front pages at every place.

I chose the safest choice, got out of that straight to my house.

No..i did not payed the bill.

The whole way home i was trying really hard to think of something to say that was not going to make my family mad, especially my grandfather, but considering whe has always mad with something, that felt like a impossible mission.

First thing i saw when i opened the door of the penthouse was my mom, standing in front of the television, and sure enough, my face was on it.

She turned to me, but before she could even say something i started to explain myself.

"Its not what it looks like mom, i swear, i didn't do it on pourpose, let me explain please-" i couldnt actually read the look on her face, but she didnt say anything, so  i took that as a go ahead.

When i explained her what happened her face relaxed a bit, but not completely, and she had a look that said your grandpa is getting in my nerves because of this.

"I'll talk to your grandfather about this, but you need to know that the way you acted wasn't appropriate, there is cameras all around and you need to be careful...lets just thank the gods you didnt pulled out a dagger right?" She walked closer to me, and i knew she was trying to comfort me, its a pitty actually, i knew she didnt wanted kids when she had me, i knew how grandpa treated her when he found out, to me, it was enough that she at least tried to love me enough.  "You already have your things packed to camp right? I know you have some more days of school but ill call them and tell them you are sick, its best for you to leave earlier this year, then your grandfather wont talk your ears out...you okay with that?"

"Yes mama, ill just finish packing some small things...do i leave today?" I felt her hands on my shoulders, and heard a silent im sorry.

"Yes, but dont be like that, think that you at least wont have to see the news talking about you..youll just be there, with your siblings, eating strawberies and..whatever else demigods do daily, right?"

Like i said, it is enough to me that she tries, even when she isnt great all the time, i know people who dont even have this.

I nodded and went to my room, making sure not to accidentally hit a new sculpture, placed in the corridor.

I didnt wait for her when i finished packing.

I knew she wouldnt be the one to take me there, she never is, she has things to do with the family business, its what ive always heard.

So when i got to the underground garage with my bags i automatically searched for one of the family drivers, sure enough, he was there.

He was a nice guy, but quiet, i knew that he probably had orders not to talk to the family members unless spoken to, grandpa did this with all of them, i also knew he never actually knows where hes been taking me, he takes me there almos every year, but always stops at the road in front of the forest, maybe this sad look he has on his face its because he thinks he is taking me to one of those crazy wilderness therapies as a punishment.

Granpa would absolutely do that if he hadnt had to live with a great public appearence.

"Miss? We are here" He looked at me in the rearview mirror, i only realized i had doze of when my eyes met his and i blinked. "Hold on tight, im going to help you with your luggage okay?"

"Oh..thank you mr bell" He opened the trunk, and then the back door for me, extending his hand to help me get out of the car "thank you, again"

"Sure miss, just let me take your bags out and we are all set okay?-"

Another car dor noise made us both look to the right, to find Clarisse La rue, closing a taxi door, with just one big suitcase in hand.

Now, my story with Clarisse is kind of complicated, i've met her when he were, eight i guess, her family bought some shares in the family business and we saw each other very regulaly, and ever since then everything everyone told me about her is that she is a troublesome girl, that i should stay far.

But she was the one who realized i was a demigodess, and took me straight to camp when a monster found me, and she was the one who, many times when we were little, comforted me when my family made me cry.

It seems like she forgot all of that because she never even looks at me.

If you ask her, she has never even met me at all actually.

"Clarisse, you're early"

"Cassandra, you too-"

"Cass actually, i prefer cass" i corrected her, to wich she just rolled her eyes and muffled a whatever. "Thats all you are taking? One suitcase?"

"And you are taking all that? How do you plan on walking the whole way with all that? Im assuming he wont go with you" she said looking at mr bell, and its true, he could not walk the whole way with me, and i could not walk with all that alone...fuck

"....you could help m-"

"No, dont even think about it"

"C'mon Clarisse!" She didnt even answered me this time actually. "Arent you a Ares-" i looked at the driver taking the suitcases out. "A ares...type of kid? You will pass on the oportunity to demonstrate your muscles or whatever?"

She started to walk away with a bored look, did i already said fuck?

"C'mon ill do whatever! I- i dont know.. 20 dracmas!, no?, ill help you with the cleaning duty you'll eventually have when you fuck it up? I..ill do that AND ill cure you anytime you want, everyday, no matter the time!"

She stopped walking.

Yes! I knew it, one of the many problems clarisse had its that she likes to go out at night to train alone, and when she gets hurt she cant ask anyone to help her, because she would get caught

"Give me those suitcases already and shut up-" she was interrupted by a very happy me hugging her.

"Thankyouthankyouthankyouclarisse!"

I felt her hands on my arms and realized she was going to push me away, so i took a step back

"Geez Clarisse, you could've just told me to back off, dont be like that... just take these and ill take those"

I said pointing to the suitcases, and saying goodbye to mr bell.

Can i already welcome summer and his crazy energy? No? Okay.

[c0rpseductor]

bitching and moaning post

i know the satanic panic was completely nuts and that nothing that was alleged in it actually happened in any way. i still hate seeing it mentioned so much bc so many people will bring up fucking false memory syndrome foundation talking points in response, like "they implanted false memories in kids to make them say this shit, remember that it's what happens to everyone who says they had a 'repressed memory' and that's always how they 'retrieve' these things in therapy, DID came out of the satanic panic and it's not a real diagnosis and the people who claim to suffer from it...uhhh idk made it up for attention and weren't really abused i guess!"

it's so fucking exhausting. i know i shouldnt have looked in the tags of that post and it's my own fault for upsetting myself. i just wish people wouldn't say shit like this. i hate feeling like nobody would believe me about what abuse i suffered in my family just because i had such difficulty with recall. like yes it is possible to forget parts of a trauma and still have it affect you that's why it's part of the diagnostic criteria for fucking ptsd. not everyone who claims to have forgotten something is making shit up or talking about like. remembering things bc of fucking hypnosis therapy. when i was in therapy most of what happened was me describing fucking actual abuse that was happening in my family right then and having nobody give a shit bc Kids Are Dramatic. nobody was trying to make me think i was abused because nobody listened to me about the abuse i was even able to articulate was happening.

and like. saying DID was fucking invented by the satanic panic isn't even fucking Accurate, but i'm just so exhausted of hearing it anyway. like ok so clearly the reason ive had all these symptoms since i was very young before i even understood DID was not "for television" (bc i legitimately thought it was like, a fictional parody of schizophrenia) is because um. ?????. yeah. no youre right when things happen to me i should definitely accept that i can't tell what they are and listen to the people who tell me that i'm stupid and nobody has ever abused me and that i can't ever trust anything i remember. you guys definitely have my best interests at heart. my dad was innocent! it was all a sexual fantasy just like freud said! nice men would never do those things! like. ugh. i just hate it i hate that i doubted myself all my life and felt so miserable going through abuse alone and being gaslit and people are STILL FUCKING DOING THE GASLIGHTING!!!!! bc they dont like. know what actually happened during the satanic panic and think loftus was right. everyone who was involved in the false memory syndrome foundation should be shot.

like. i dont want to question myself anymore. i dont want my first thought whenever i have flashbacks or get upset to be "i'm making this up. if i remember something bad it was imaginary, because nobody can forget and remember something bad. it must be satanic panic pseudoscience, somehow." why do some people think they're doing a service to survivors when they trot this shit out. idk.

i know it happened. long after i began remembering stuff my mom has alluded to my dad doing the exact same things to her, having the exact same attitudes and patterns and everything, and i think the only reason i remember anything more violent than she reports is because he understood i was forgetting things and could get away with doing stuff to me that he couldn't with somebody who would remember it. like, everything i remember is horrible, but it makes complete sense and is totally possible and doesn't contradict anything about like...my parents or my life before i began remembering or just basic things like "can someone physically do this." like my dad wasnt an evil cult wizard he was just a normal thug and rapist. idk. i just really did not need to expose myself to this stuff and it's my fault i did but. ughhh

[aro-ortega]

HELLO I LOVE HERALD and I'm here to add my two bits on why romance with him could work!

Okay first, I chose the anarchist route for my Sidestep but even so, Step would have agreed to train him either way. That's bc I made Step into a sort of "reluctant villain." That is to say, Step never was and never wanted to be one of the bad guys. Her days as a hero are her happy days, the days that defined who she is as a character, her core values. Even when she's a villain, she's not really -- she believes this is the only way to win back some kind of life, but the truth is, she just... wants to be happy. Have a good life. That's all. And being a villain is, to her, the only option. (I'm trying to sum her and saying all this bc the other anon said all versions of Step wouldn't work for this, and I kindly disagree uwu)

Enter Herald. Yes he's essentially her replacement, the person with the seemingly perfect life, perfect face, everyone loves him - he is everything Step wished she could ever be. So it's normal for her to dislike him. But bc, in my Step's situation, she's got too much of a big heart not to take pity on him, she agrees to train him. He needs the training anyway and it's painfully obvious.

After the life of pain and abuse Step had to endure, I think Herald would feel like... a breath of fresh air. He doesn't come with the baggage of shared history like Ortega, he's new, and so easy to read that Step doesn't event have to use her telepathy. He's gentle with her the way nobody else has been, and lord knows Step needs some gentleness in her life! think, at first, it would be kind of an escapism for Step -- why can't she enjoy this? A guy who is head over heels for her from the get go? Being with Herald would be easy, and is that such a bad thing? Yeah, at first it wouldn't be 100% genuine on Step's end - she's just choosing to delude herself. But in the end, especially after spending more time together and learning more about him, I think the feelings would be real. One's love doesn't have to be complicated to be true. And that would be the case with Herald :')

(Also I never picked any of the "oh no, he's hot" options, and Herald as a RO works fine without em as well. So Step having feels for him doesn't stem from him being attractive. )

that's a totally valid way to play sidestep, especially one that is romancing herald. i cant relate though, since i was going with options i dont normally pick on my heraldmance playthrough which meant i went full villlain mode and killed as often as i could. gives a very different flavour to the heraldmance that i absolutely recommend.

"After the life of pain and abuse Step had to endure, I think Herald would feel like… a breath of fresh air. He doesn't come with the baggage of shared history like Ortega, he's new, and so easy to read[...]"

"He's gentle with her the way nobody else has been, and lord knows Step needs some gentleness in her life! think, at first, it would be kind of an escapism for Step -- why can't she enjoy this? A guy who is head over heels for her from the get go? Being with Herald would be easy, and is that such a bad thing?"

"Yeah, at first it wouldn't be 100% genuine on Step's end - she's just choosing to delude herself. But in the end, especially after spending more time together and learning more about him, I think the feelings would be real."

sorry i dont really have anything more to add to this, i just wanted to highlight where i think you really hit the sidestep/herald dynamic on its head. like these are absolutely The Reasons to pursue herald as a romance option.

(i've not tried romancing herald where "oh no he's hot" is what initiates it, so imo avoiding those choices and still ending up romancing him is, to me, The Way to romance him)

[lgbtpolitics]

@woozapooza

So basically my overall opinion is just that I dont think it actually matters; basically every argument in favour of needing gay actors falls flat to me. I dont believe it adds authenticity or whatever, I dont believe it increases whatever good is being done by the representation itself etc. I have some sympathy for this in the sense that a lot of famous actors ARE actually a bit rubbish and can only play characters similar to themselves. But this is its own problem imo, an actually good actor should be able to play a character of any sexuality. In fact I think its starts to border on offensive when people suggest being gay is just too foreign to straight people. Whats more is that the actors arent really the driving force; lots of terribly written gay characters have been played by gay actors, if you're concerned about authenticity and how that potentially bleeds into being actively bad representation the place to start is the writers room not the cast.

Only one thing has ever been pointed out to me that I did agree with which is that if certain media is deliberately written to boost LGBT representation then it should be employing LGBT actors. And yeah that's true enough, I dont think it has to be a 1 to 1 conversion like LGBT actors can play cishet characters if its a good fit but they should be making some effort to include a high number.

Having said all that, the two most common arguments against needing gay actors to play gay characters also fall entirely flat.

"It should only be about who's the best actor": no it shouldn't lmao. Obviously you want the best actor possible but almost every character is constrained by some other characteristics - age, gender, race, height, and so on. You dont cast David Tennant as Matilda no matter how good of an actor he is. Sexuality isnt any worse or better as something to take into consideration.

"Saying gay actors should play gay characters forces people out of the closet" this one just winds me up especially when it moves from media into a general idea that NOTHING ever should be specifically for LGBT people. Nobody is being forced to do anything because people don't think you should play a certain character. Playing a gay character is not some human right being taken away from actors unless they come out of the closet. Its not even actually being taken away, just disapproved of. There are actually loads of gay characters being played by straight actors who just ignore any disapproval. People dont have to like your work and if they dislike it on the basis that you arent (openly) gay, that doesnt make it some kind of hate crime. It is not akin to outing someone or whatever. This goes double for media that is actively hailed as some big progressive representation. Again I feel like it starts getting offensive at a certain point like all these twitter gays who want to see themselves represented by actors who are also gay are some massive force controlling the poor millionaire actors who have no choice but to bend. I have sympathy for actors who are just starting out but I still think its on you to decide to either not portray a certain character if you dont wanna discuss or just ignore any comments.

It comes around to celebrity culture as well because when actors are just... good at their jobs and not really in the limelight on a personal I rarely see any comments like this. Its actors who's personal lives are consistently a major focus of the news. And like whose fault that is is a whole other question but it does make me think like this wouldn't be a problem if we just treated actors like normal people and wouldnt even know their sexuality.

(Fyi all of this goes for actors playing bisexual characters too I have just simplified it, it gets more complicated when talking of trans characters).

[one-hell-of-otaku-is-here]

Evangelion 3.0 You can (not) redo be like... (my unfiltered reaction to the movie)

I am only cca 10 min in and I am already crying

WTF HAPPENED TO EVERYONE (but Kaworu bless his soul) I DONT LIKE THIS "GLOW UP"

This is some post post Apocalypse shit and NOBODY gives a shit for a boy who kind of scaed ur asses before and slept for like a long time and is confused af. Liek literally nobody like pm they are under an attack bit it looks like everybody blames Shinji for previous event (at least new guys) like ok without Kaworu everyone would be dead but who was supposed to know Adam and Lilith would fuse like this???

"Don't do anything" BRO MISATO-SAN???? AS INFJ (who's kind of similar to INFP's Shinji) that cold stare and words hurt me deeply

I can't believe I am saying this but I kind of liked anime series abs The end of EVA better than this

They even call my boy by some number as if he was some object. Excuse me he's treated as a criminal even though he technically didn't want to be and wanted to save everyone I AM SO MAD

Fine so we are getting our info...

Ya as I thought... 14 years passed... hahahha ofc they'd be a little mad but this is overdoing it... basically he'd die if he got too emotional lol (I wanna die and we didn't even get to Kaworu at this point he HAS to give my boi happiness)

Most depressing NGE arc... is 3.0

REI REI REI

KAWORU ON PIANO

And ofc Gendou is as same as ever lmao (this impact conversed him back to how he was in anime series Ig)

I wonder if NERV is still going to do Human instrumentality project Ig its kind of gives off these vibes (later I was right this didn't change ge anything for Gendou just made him even colder like he was written before)

OK so this Rei is different altogether from all pheromones versions. She's truly like a robot only following Gendou's orders

I feel so bad for Shinji.... rn he only has Kaworu who's obesssed with him obv but tbh at his position I'd take any friends I could get

My so long awaited gay moments I was waiting for are finally here - and the reason why I am still watching (ok that's a lie rn I do want to know how it ends)

"I was born to meet you= I love you" is making me swoon all over again

Well fuck Ig that answers what happened to everyone (the fact that freaking angel.had to show it to Mc is even more depressing)

Sometimes doing the right thing can cause massive destruction- a novel written by 3.0's Ikari Shinji

There is always hope - Big apause to the best character in this show I don't care what you think this is what we needed to hear

Fyutsuki trying to do right thing by talking to Shinji while giving us his lore lol (he should have done that sooner) but this will break him

OK so now that Shinji knows he didn't save this Rei he can't find excuse for tragedy he indirectly caused(and for which he shouldn't be blamed for remember SEELE is abs amwsyeb be the main villain of NGE. But I do understand bitterness of others)... so he's slowly losing his mind

HES TAKING HIS COLLAR ?it's scene I saw before when I spo8led myself) afabatvayzvahFga I can't be ever normal about Kawoshin

They're piloting together hahaha (Ig soon we'll see THE tragedy)

Bruh this looks bad (and yk it's bad when Kaworu is nervous)

Gadouh planned all this obv and now we're fucked (again) - but it's OK he'll be killed either way

Btw this is on side note: but I find Makinami kind of annoying in this movie - she's basically being little brat and too relaxed unlike Asuka who's in his war mode 24/7 and it irks me in bad way with that said

How did Kaworu not see this happening is beyond me

We're fighting new Adam Ig (I can't wait to watch theory on this so I'd understand all this better I feel like you're constantly confused how these angel awakening work)

Is there even anyone left to kill aside from WILLIE and what's left of NERV?? This is the second craziest shit I have seen after The end of NGE because ofc nobody can top that

Lololol

RIP Kaworu - we seen it coming but his last words>>>> dw your resting place will be entirety of the old world (this quote from Genshin is fitting for him rn)

Fourth impact averted at great cost fuck this was amazing

THAT ENDING SOMG ;-;-;-;;-;-;-;-;-; AGRESSIVELY ADDED TO MY SPOTIFY LIST

And so...

Bravo Anno you created a masterpiece that you always wanted. Now I can rest in peace before I watch Thrice upon time

[digiblueslush]

Here are some more opinions and quick disclaimer: if we have different opinions that’s totally ok. I’m not forcing you to like vbs music or dislike ichika, these are just some of my thoughts.

6 - going back to the favorite vocalist thing, I have a hard time ranking all of the character equally as it’s hard to compare the more masculine voices with the more feminine ones, and I have SUCH I hard time ranking the guys because I really like all of them. But my favorite feminine voices are mizuki, haruka, nene, and an and for the masculine ones it’s super close but rui would have to be my favorite

7 - there are a lot (or maybe a few I can’t remember too specifically off the top of my head) of VS songs that really should’ve been sekai songs. Right now the one coming to mind is meteor for L/N. Even though I’m not their biggest fan, they would’ve SLAYED THAT. It has that rock-ish vibe, it has the space title, and I think it would actually sound good if they lowered the notes (looking at you teo) and obviously I get that sometimes there can be scheduling conflicts or what not that would prevent certain covers from existing, but it’s does make me sad that there’s that missed potential.

8 - co-op shows. This isn’t a problem I have with the game but with the players. Why so many disbands?? I totally get it if you don’t want to play a song that’s picked, but you can just wait another 15 seconds for the show to start and then disconnect so the other 4 people don’t have to get disconnected to like gurrrl. I don’t get what part of that is so hard

9 - why are cover tickets/vouchers SO DAMN EXPENSIVE? When I first started playing they were I believe 10,000 event tokens, and now they’re 30,000 (which btw is 2x the amount needed for the 3 star) and in the wish piece exchange it’s literally 2000 wish pieces, enough to MASTERY RANK A 4 STAR? I dont get why they are so pricey/hard to get when game wise they do not have too much value, and most of the time I play the normal version anyways. I’d be ok with 10,000 event points but 30,000 is wayyyyyy too much

10 - this is more story related so apologies if anything is incorrect, but tell me how the fuck nobody else knows about the existence of the sekai’s besides the members themselves? In the main stories when they first go, they come back and they’re like “oh I must’ve fell asleep” and I was thinking about this when I finally went through the n25 main stories. You’re telling me, mafuyu was in the sekai for this long period of time, so in the real world she’d be asleep, and she wasn’t yelled at by her parents for not studying? Or attending school? There’s a lot of I guess plot holes for a lack of better terms when it comes to the sekai stuff

11 - speaking of n25 (and once again NOT CAUGHT UP) therapy. Now. But besides that and based off of what I know, I am so confused as they are still a group. Don’t get me wrong I love them, but story wise (NOT CAUGHT UP THIS IS BASED OFF OF THE MAIN AND THE FIRST HANDFUL OF EVENTS) one of them has this I hate all of you moment, everybody else works on fixing that person, and then it somehow resolves. Kanade’s who reasoning of I need to make music for mafuyu to make her happy is so toxic, and it frustrates me that everybody else thinks that that’s ok. And mafuyu…. Mafuyu mafuyu mafuyu. I get that at school or with parent yes she’s definitely putting on a mask, and that she’s not actually happy and what not, but with that said it makes no sense that your friends/bandmates almost ascend to the heavens because you ever so slightly smiled. The whole dynamic between n25 is just so toxic and (FROM WHAT IVE READ) it’s also really shallow. I get that games like this don’t usually delve into mental health things, and they still do show some of the harder moments, but for the most part it feels like they kinda just keep it very general and more so imply that someone is struggling, but the main part of the story is the other group members “fixing” whoever is struggling in the story, which again TOXIC. THERAPY. But it’s such a bummer that they dance around these really serious issues that affect people and kinda slap a “my little pony friendship is magic” band aid on it and it fixes it for the moment

I probably still have more to say but eat up for now :)

Feeling very intensely over project sekai right now (I’ve pulled almost 150 times for this damn rui card and I have no more energy to keep farming, and also I didn’t realize that the close game offline bachata was coming back so aaaaaa) so here are some random opinions I have and note that I am not a consistent story reader, I’ve read some of them but not every one

1 - out of the units, VBS has the best music. Period. I’d say 90% of their commissions AND covers are spectacular, there’s really only one or 2 covers I can say I’m not fond of, and some of the songs that I think are just ok are still really good, they’re just not my kind of style

2 - honami is not underrated. I will not tolerate “honami is underrated” this “honami is underrated” that. if everyone in the entire universe thinks says that, she’s not. Now, I really have only read 1 or 2 l/n stories, and if people didn’t say she was the best character ever all the time I’d probably like her more, but she is just kinda meh to me

3 - if we want to talk underrated though, HARUKA. Yes I am biased, but still. How often do you see people getting excited about her in the way they do over literally any other character? She’s easily in the top 5 vocals in the game (honestly I’d put her at one but I’ll go more into why that’s not the case in the next blurb). Personality wise (I haven’t kept up with stories in a while so bear with me and my projecting) she’s feels so genuine and mature, and she’s just got this calming presence to her that I really like. Yet I see NOBODY ever talk about her. Have y’all heard her chikyuu saigo cover?? Or really most of the alts she has? She’s amazing and I love her

4 - I have beef with whoever picks/arranges lines for the vocalists if that makes sense? It really didn’t click with me until I heard a part of the l/n Tokyo teddy bear cover. There was a line (and I don’t remember it off of the top of my head so sorry but anyways) that would’ve been AMAZING with shiho’s stronger, deeper vocals. And they gave it to either saki or honami, and it made this really powerful sound something weak and flimsy. And I’ve noticed this a lot in other songs more broadly too. Honami and saki aren’t bad vocalists at all, but the lines they are given don’t fit their voices, and this happens with a majority of the characters. I’d love to give haruka best vocals, because some of her covers are just so beautiful, but some of the songs she’s in really don’t highlight her type of vocals. Top of my head I’m thinking her near cover, where once again it just sounds weak and unenthusiastic. I know not every song can perfectly fit with every vocalist every time, but this genuinely happens so much and it irritates me a lot (and don’t get me started on the vs tuning 75% of the time yeesh) with this specific issue, I think every group does have it to some extent, but n25 is better at giving the right lines to the right vocalist, followed by vbs. And I’d honestly expect n25 to be able to make weird lines assignments work a majority of the time. They all have pretty versatile voices and in my opinion they have the most professional sound out of the 5 groups. With that said, in the context of the game, I’d have to say mizuki’s vocals are number one for me. The way they are able to almost shapeshift their voice is incredible, and I can’t recall a song where I think they sounded out of place. Haruka is still number 2, but it’s a bummer that so many times the vocals sound off because the va’s are given something that simply aren’t in their range, or their voice doesn’t just doesn’t give off the vibe requested from the song.

5 - Leo/need. Where do I even begin. Like I said I haven’t read much of their story nor do I remember it, but I’ve got beef. Please don’t attack me for this, but I really don’t like ichika. I’m sorry it had to be said but most of the time I just can’t stand her. I get that Leo/need is a band type group and she is the vocalist, but this mechanic doesn’t make sense a in a game where every other group everyone gets vocals in songs and b THE DRUMMER AND KEYBOARDISTS SING?? Like if saki was giving harmonies, that’s fine, and I totally get shiho having more vocal lines then saki and honami cuz stage wise she’d still be more up front and it’s not uncommon for guitar/bass players to add to vocals, but it makes no sense for a drummer to have vocal lines. Like in the slightest. Like that’s not how sound works at live shows?? Or lungs?? And with that in mind, I do think it’s actually insane how Leo/need is just Mike and ichika 90% of the time. And ichika in general just annoys me for some reason. Nothing in specific but she urkes me. Last Leo/need opinion for the moment, but going back to the honami is underrated thing, SHIHO. YALL THE DISRESPECT. I honestly don’t care too much for l/n but shiho is the best thing about l/n. I know her 1 cover is decently talked about, but I am OBSESSED with her from Tokyo cover. She somehow can sound edgy but also soft and light at the same time, and honestly I just think she’s really cool in general, and I wish she got more vocals in songs :(

I have more but I’m exhausted. I’ll probably add on to this at some point

[xoxo-teddybear]

Bakugou Turns Into A Dog - Bakugou Katsuki

Bakugou x f!reader

Warnings: Fluff, crack, lowkey pervy Katsuki, cursing, (writing not spell checked!)

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

Request: Bakugou’s been hit with a quirk that has given him the body of a dog. He’s still has his own human thoughts and voice but now..he’s a dog. Just how will he abuse his new power with f!Y/N

It was supposed to be a normal day! Well, as normal as it could get for UA. But of course, trouble just had to strike, and of course the ones at the center of it all was the infamous Bakusquad. More specifically, the man the group was named after.

“I-...I can’t believe that actually just h-happened!” A cheerful blonde cried out as tears fell from his face and laughter rang out from his voice.

“C’mon man, don’t be laughing at what just happened. This is serious,” Kirishima said with concern as he looked down in his arms.

“Are you serious? This has got to be the best thing that’s ever happen since we met Bakugou!” Kaminari replied with while once again dying of laughter.

“IF YOU DONT SHUT THE HELL UP RIGHT NOW SPARK PLUG, I’LL BLOW YOUR ASS TO BITS!” Bakugou barked out.

“Oh yeah? With what quirk lil pupper?” Denki slickly replied while booping his nose. Bakugou’s been making fun of Denki for the longest, this was the perfect revenge. His dear friend has been turned into a dog! Not just any dog, and not the dog you would expect. He wasn’t a german shepherd or rottweiler. Katsuki Bakugou sits in Kirishima’s arms as a fluffy, blonde, angry pomeranian.

Luckily, kinda, the only thing that changed about Bakugou was his body. He could still speak and understand the human language and he could still think like one too, but now it’s all that in a fluffy, round, adorable body. Now, he was all bark and no bite......sorta.

“OW!” Kaminari yelped as Bakugou latched onto his finger and growled. Passerbys watched as the young group of teens watched their friend throw his hand around in pain with a tiny floof dangling on it. Kirishima went in to grab Bakugou and calm Kaminari down.

“Damn, you little rugrat,” The electric blonde started, “just wait till Y/N sees you, she’s gonna die.” Kaminari teased. Once those words left his mouth, Bakugou’s puppy eyes went wide.

‘Oh hell no!’

Kirishima saw how his friend was shaking in his arms and grew concerned so he asked, “hey man, are you alright there Bakubro?”

Bakugou was extremely nervous. He couldn’t let his longtime crush see him like this! Like a weak, soft, puffball! If you saw Bakugou like this, the second he’d turn back to his normal self, he’d dive out the nearest window anytime you were around.

The entire Bakusquad knew of Katsuki’s little (HUGE) crush, and the fact that one of them was now able to use that information against him mortified the lil guy now.

“Aww c’mon Denki, that’s not very nice,” Mina said as she pet Bakugou’s little head before he snapped at her hand. Thankfully, she dodged it.

“Yeah well Kacchan hasn’t been very nice either! Damn mutt nearly bit my finger off!” This received a growl from Bakugou, which was unsurprising pretty normal.

“At least the cops told us the quirk will ware off in two weeks.” Sero stated. Kirishima joined in.

“Yeah. Sheesh, I still can’t believe what happened. That random criminal really jumped outta nowhere.” The red head said.

“Tch, I still can’t believe someone could be stuck with a shitty ass quirk like that. Turning people into pets. Ridiculous.” The blonde dog said.

“Imagine what it’s like being on the receiving end of that quirk. Must be just as ridiculous.” Mina teased.

Bakugou jumped down from Kirishima’s arms before speaking. “Yeah! No shit Pinkie!” He said while standing on his hind legs and motioning towards his new body with his front paws as if he were human.

——————————————————————————

As the group made it to the front doors of the dormitory, Bakugou stopped them before entering.

“Listen up dumbasses! Nobody better say SHIT to Y/N. Just say I’m some random dog found on the street and you guys opted to take care of me till you found me a home. If she asks what happened to me, tell her I was forced onto a trip with my parents. Got that?!” Bakugou strictly spoke.

“Got it!” The group said in unison, but a certain blonde had a different plan in mind. As they entered through the doors, Kirishima hid Bakugou into the side of his jacket but it only made comical sense that you were the first person to greet them.

“Oh! Hey guys!” You said with your award winning smile as you walked towards the group. Before anyone could say anything else, Kaminari spoke up.

“Hey Y/N! You wanna guess what Kirishima has in his jacket?” Denki exclaimed.

“Oh, no I’m sure Y/N has better things to do!”

“Maybe she shouldn’t,”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,”

The 3 friends were throwing out excuse after excuse to keep you from seeing the little devil.

“Woah woah! Hey! You guys! Chill. If you don’t want me to see then I won’t force you. It’s fine.” You kindly said.

‘Whew’ the squad all thought

‘She is so awesome!’ Bakugou thought while in the jacket

“Oh c’mon guys, show her the puppy!” Kaminari said. Now that grabbed your attention.

“Wait? Puppy?! That’s what you guys are hiding. Awww no fair!! Can I please see it! Please please pleaseeee!!!” You begged. After your constant pleading and the squad’s constant denial, Bakugou thought he could just give in this one time. He knew that his friends would cover for him and say he’s just some random dog and you would drop it so he began to stick his snout out of the jacket. Kirishima took it as a sign to show him to you.

“Oh my goddd!!! It’s so cute!!! Boy or girl?” You kindly asked while petting Bakugou’s head, something the dog was enjoying a little too much.

“It’s a boy,” Kirishima said. “We found him on the street so even though we’re kinda busy we wanted to take care of him and heal him up till we can find him a new home.” Mina added on.

“Guyssss c’mon!! Tell her the best part! Tell her exactly who that dog is.” Kaminari begged. The Bakusquad including the dog looked towards Kaminari with a warning look, but Kaminari didn’t care. The ultimate revenge starts now.

“Y/N! That’s Bakugou!” Kaminari exclaimed. As everyone started denying it, you looked towards the dog and saw that it did resemble Bakugou a lot, but then again Bakugou did look like an angry pomeranian time and time again.

Before you chose to listen to one or the other, you weighed your options. Kirishima the chivalrous and honest, the manliest man, or Kaminari the jester himself? It’s was obvious who you were gonna listen to.

“Oh stop that Kaminari. Bakugou may look like a fiesty fluff ball from time to time but he’s not really a dog.” You said while petting the pupper’s chin. Everyone sighed in relief at your words.

“But that’s really-“ Kaminari was cut of with Sero wrapping his tape around his mouth.

“Hey if you guys need a healer, I could use my quirk to help out with that. It may not be a full on healing quirk but it should help the little guy. Plus, I don’t mind spending the next...?” Kirishima helped you out.

“Two weeks,” he said.

“Right, I don’t mind spending the next two weeks with the little cutie.” You said. The dog’s eyes went wide at that as a plan came into mind but the Bakusquad once again started denying, saying it was fine but you insisted since Mina just previously said they were all busy. Throughout the chaos a VERY human like sound came from the creature in Kirishima’s arms.

“Woof.” Bakugou said with such a casual demeanor. He said ‘woof’ in such a human like voice, it was absolutely absurd. As everyone looked down at the dog, the only thing that could be heard was Sero awkwardly giving out a cough to break the silence.

“Ok...well umm that may be a sign that he’s ok with me taking him!” You said with an excited smile. Kirishima looked at the dog and as Bakugou looked back up at him, his best friend knew that he should give you the dog.

“Ok Y/N, he’s all yours. But you’re right about one thing. Since he does look like Bakugou, we named him Blasty, so that’s what you should refer to him as,” he said while placing the dog in your arms. The pomeranian was excited as what appeared to be a small smile showed up in his face and he squirmed around in Y/N’s arms, cuddling up against her pillowy breast.

“Awesome! For the next two weeks, it’s me and you Blasty!” You said while carrying Bakugou in the air facing you and looking at him. He was too cute so you pulled him in for a hug and kiss on his little head. Everyone could see Bakugou had a smug look on his face.

“Alright guys! I better get to healing him!” You said as you ran off with the pupper still holding a smug look, this time directed at Kaminari.

“Looks like your plan backfired dude,” Sero said.

“And it looks like Bakugou is gonna be enjoying these next 2 weeks a little too much,” Mina said and the group shared a laugh. Well, except for Kaminari who was kinda irritated that his revenge failed, but happy for his friend nonetheless.

——————————————————————————

Once you got back to your room you placed Blasty on your bed and started to check him for places where he needed healing.

“Huh, looks like you’re not really injured Blasty. Oh well, that’s fine! Just means I can spend more time with you without having to worry!” You said while rubbing his head. Bakugou leaned into your hand with a small and then rolled onto his back for belly rubs. He was hoping you would pet him some more but you didn’t.

“I’m sorry Blasty, but you need a bath before you hang around anymore. Let’s go!” You picked him up and he was wide eyed and bushy tailed. A bath. Whatever. As long as he got your attention. You placed him in the tub but realized you would be getting your clothes dirty, so you changed into some pajamas you wore the night before that were sitting in your hamper in your bathroom. Basically, you changed right infront of Bakugou. He was staring at you as if you were a meal. As you undressed infront of him he saw you in your panties and bra, matching of course, and damn your body was the exact definition of perfect. He licked his lips as he stared until you put on a cami top and black booty shorts.

“Damn..” he whispered.

When you came back to Bakugou you went down to his level and began to scrub him. You reveled in your touch and soaked in the hot water. When you took him out to dry him off you looked at the time and noticed it was pretty late.

“Alright, I guess we should head to bed. I’ll put on a move and we can sleep. Here, let me go set up some pillows for you to sleep on.” You said as you grabbed your spare pillows and placed them on the floor for Blasty.

As you got into bed you felt a little movement on your mattress. Apparently Bakugou hadn’t appreciated being on the floor. He wanted to sleep next to his future girl. So when you turned over and looked at him, he gave you puppy eyes.

“Oh...why the hell do you have to be so damn cute,” you said as you picked him up and placed him on your bed. Bakugou cuddled up in your chest and took in your delicious scent. You both drifted off to sleep while Bakugou was just having happy thought.

‘This is gonna be the best 2 weeks of my life!’

——————————————————————————

Ohhh what a week. You thought taking care of Blasty would be fun and exciting and adorable but it was that and more. It was also kinda frustrating. The damn dog would “bark” and growl at everyone, especially guys who tried to talk to you, and would only eat human food. He refused dog treats and never wanted to approach other dogs. Hell, this dog didn’t even go outside to use the bathroom. He went into the actual bathroom! Oh and don’t even get Y/N started on the “barking.” That dog had the most clear and humane “woof” any dog’s ever had! Another thing! This dog’s behavior is a little outta line. When Y/N would shower, it would try to follow her in and just sit there. When she would change, it would lay on her bed smiling and staring at her. When she would sleep it would ONLY cuddle into her breast or booty and one time when she woke up in the middle of the night, Blasty was up too. Again. STARING. What is up with this dog?

——————————————————————————

“Ugh!” Y/N said as she face planted the table. Her lunch completely disregarded and the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou because apparently he had to go on a trip with his parents...or so you thought) watching as the blonde mutt poked around her head on the table.

“Having fun there Y/N?” Mina asked to which Y/N replied with a stare and a twitching eye.

“Blasty is INSANE!” You roared out. The Bakusquad and Blasty (aka Bakugou) watched on. “Don’t get me wrong, I love having the little guy around but he has some weird habits for a dog. He won’t eat like a dog, use the bathroom like a dog, interact with other dogs, and don’t get me started on the barks! I’ve never heard a dog say WOOF like a human,” you took a breather before continuing, “another thing, Blasty is a lowkey perv sometimes. Well if he were human at least, but he has perv tendencies. Like the staring whenever I’m a little underdressed or in the tub or SLEEPING.”

With that rant, Bakugou felt his ears fell and he backed up into a corner on the table. He was starting to feel insecure. Had his crush really thought of him as a pervy little thing? When you saw Blasty’s reaction, you noticed he might’ve understood what you said.

‘Can he....no there’s no way.’ You thought about the dog. Was there a possibility he could understand everything you just said?

“Oh Blasty, don’t be so dramatic. I’m just saying, for a dog, you’re a little weirdo, but it’s okay because for the time being, you’re my little weirdo. I still got love for you!” You said while holding him up in the air. Once again, the dog had a reaction to your words.

The squad was starting to notice the gears in your head turn and Kirishima quickly took him away for a little “walk.”

“Oh hey Y/N, why don’t you finish your food and I’ll take Baku- BLASTY! For a walk. Yeah, maybe he needs some outdoor exercise.

“Oh no Kiri it’s fine I-“

“THANKS!” The red head said as he dashed out the cafeteria with the little floof. Oh well, might as well enjoy your last few minutes of peace.

——————————————————————————

“What the HELL SHITTY HAIR!? She was all up on me back there! You didn’t have to drag me away!” Bakugou spoke as Kirishima held him from his armpits.

“Sorry man, but you were the one who said you didn’t want your cover blown and she was starting to figure it out. And c’mon Bakugou, she knows you better than someone who would go on a trip with his parents. Not only that but your looks are so obvious. What dog had red eyes and spikey blonde hair?!?” The red head explained. The blonde dog only crossed his arms in a very human like manner and turned to the side.

“We’ll be fine, the quirk will ware off in another week so get over it. Besides, there’s no way she’ll know! We have everyone that was there covering it up for me. It’s fine!” Bakugou replied.

His best friend sighed before saying “alright man, if that’s what you want,” and placed him down to head back to the cafeteria.

“Thank you! Jeez, now let’s get back to the cafeteria. I wanna have lunch with my Y/N.” Bakugou walked on all fours with his head held proudly.

“You may be a tiny dog, but that huge crush on her that you got going on is still going strong,” the red head said.

“You’re damn right, Shitty hair!”

As the boys walked, they didn’t know that from around the corner, Y/N heard everything.

‘Bakugou?! Quirk??? CRUSH?!!?’ Oh this was too good. With this new information, Y/N walked off with a smirk and a plan.

——————————————————————————

The next few days passed and like always, you work up with Blasty, oh you mean Bakugou, on your chest. You slightly smiled knowing this past 2 weeks, your crush had been coddling over you. You got even more excited knowing your feelings were mutual. You woke up and got ready for the day.

Now, the same thing happened as always. You got up and went to the bathroom to shower and Blasty would follow. He would watch you undress and step in the shower and step out and change. You would pick him up, hold him tight, kiss his forehead, and then be out the room. This time, your routine felt a little different knowing it was actually Bakugou staring at you this whole time.

Oh. He had seen you naked multiple times. You didn’t know whether to be embarrassed or flattered. Oh well, he kept on staring is he must’ve been enjoying the show, except this time, you actually gave him one. You slowly stripped outta your clothes and made slight and soft R-rated noises as the warm water hit your skin. You bent over as you put on your underwear and slowly got dressed. You couldn’t believe yourself. Serving these looks to a dog.

Bakugous cheeks would be so red under that fur, the way you moved this morning was everything. He didn’t even notice the drool slipping from his mouth. As you stood there in nothing but your panties and bra, you turned towards Bakugou. And idea came to your head.

“Hey Blasty! You wanna help me pick out a look today? We sure are lucky the school staff has an all day meeting! Free day for us!” You picked Bakugou up and held him against your nearly bare breast. Bakugou just had to rub himself in between your mounds a little, and you noticed this, and released a slight whine.

“Mm..hey Blasty, stop that.” You placed him down and dressed into a mini skirt and tube top. You matched with a pair of everyday causal heels and went out with Bakugou following along. He would walk directly under your side and look up. He enjoyed the view of your lace panties and the jiggle of your ass everytime you took a step. Man, was this a perfect Friday or what?

Well it would’ve been if it hadn’t been for a certain Icy-Hot. What Bakugou didn’t know, was that you texted Todoroki the previous night to help you with this little plan of yours.

“Hey L/N.” Todoroki greeted you with kid kind eyes and gentle smile.

“Todoroki, stop that. I told you that you’re one of the people who can call me Y/N.” You said.

“Well alright, then I insist you call me Shoto in return.” He said.

“Only seems fair!” You said with a giggle to which Todoroki stared at.

“You have such a beautiful smile.” He complimented. You blushed at his words, especially since Todoroki really wasn’t one for..umm..emotions.

“Thanks,” you bashfully said while stepping a little closer. As Bakugou watched this whole interaction go down from below, he couldn’t help but release a small growl. No way in hell is Half and Half taking his girl!

“Actually, there was a reason why I called you over.” Todoroki said before speaking again. This caught your attention and Bakugou’s. “I was wondering if your wanted to go in a date with me. Tonight. It could be really casual and we could even do a small movie night here in the common rooms. Just you and me. What do you say?” He asked. Bakugou was fuming.

“A date huh? Mm, I’m sorry Shoto, but I’ve actually kinda been waiting for Bakugou to get back.” You said which made Bakugou flip his head towards you.

“Bakugou?” Todoroki asked.

“Yeah. I’ve had a small crush on him for awhile, and I was hoping my first date would be with him.” You explained. The cartwheels Bakugou’s heart was doing in his tiny body was ridiculous.

‘She likes me back She likes me back She likes me back!!!!’ The dog thought to himself. His tail began wagging and his smile grew bigger than ever.

“Well I heard he’ll be gone until Saturday,” Todoroki started, “so how about just for tonight, I keep you company with a movie, maybe some chocolate, maybe some flowers, and see where the night goes?” He asked. Bakugou snarled at the two toned boy with his fangs until he heard your voice.

“Sure!” You said.

“Really?” Todoroki asked.

‘Really?!’ Bakugou thought.

“Really!” You said, “Bakugou will be gone for another week so I see no harm in hanging as friends!” You smiled once more.

“Great! This’ll be amazing Y/- OUCH” Bakugou had interrupted Todoroki by latching onto his leg and holding on with his life as Todoroki did everything he could to shake the blonde mutt off. You reached for “Blasty” before apologizing to Todoroki.

“I’m sorry, Shoto. He gets like this sometimes.” You explained.

“Ah..no worries. Uh, I’ll see you later tonight?” Todoroki asked you.

“Yeah, definitely. See you then!” You said as you walked off with a grumpy pomeranian in your arms.

‘On every level. WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?’ Bakugou thought to himself as you carried him away.

—

You walked into your room to with Bakugou to freshen up a little for your date with Todoroki. A little sprits of perfume here, a dash of blush there, and a little tweak with your hair. Your outfit was cute enough for a friendly little date. As you turned to Bakugou, you saw his sad puppy face.

“Oh, don’t worry Blasty! I’ll be back in a few hours! I’ll see you soon, ok?” You said as you kissed his forehead and made your way to the common room. Just before the door shut, Bakugou slipped out with you. If he couldn’t be on this date with you, then he’d just have to ruin it for Todoroki.

As you finally came in contact with the handsome boy, he greeted you and spoke of your plans

“We’ll be watching a movie, but we gotta get some great snacks first.” He said.

“How about just some popcorn and candy, they’re already right here in the dorms. Come over here and help me prep!” You said pulling on his hand and dragging him to the kitchen. Bakugou didn’t take too kindly to this and quickly went to tear Todoroki’s jeans and bite his ankle.

“Ouch!” Todoroki screamed in pain.

“Are you alright?” You looked around and saw his lower leg had been damaged.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Just a scratch.” He said reassuring your troubles.

“Well alright, if you say so.” You said and resumed your snack prep. But that was only the start of this horrible night. Throughout the date, Bakugou tortured the poor boy and did everything he could to ruin the little get together. He ate the popcorn and candy while your backs were turned, he chewed on the wires to the TV, stopping you guys from watching, and even peed on Todoroki’s leg while you guys just sat and talk. Although Todoroki saw this coming with Y/N’s plan, he had enough of torment from Bakugou. He decided to move into the final plan, right here right now.

“Y/N, you’re an amazing girl and any guy would be really really lucky to have you,” Bakugou watched this little speech from afar, growling at the two, “and I know you’re waiting for Bakugou, but since he’s not back yet, I kinda just wanna end this night with something special.” He said as he began to lean in, you had no intent on stopping him. Seeing this, Bakugou began to run towards the couple with every intent on stopping this kiss.

“HEYYY!!! Those lips are reserved for me!” Bakugou screamed and you both turned towards the little dog. Bakugou jumped into the air to leap onto Todoroki and at the strike of midnight, His body turned into a human again (fully clothed, don’t worry) and fell on Todoroki, making them both fall back.

“You stay away from my girl, icy-hot!” Bakugou said while on top of Todoroki, clinging to his shirt.

“She’s all yours, you angry pomeranian,” Todoroki said as he escaped and ran to his room. Bakugou only looked back at you with a fierce smirk. He walked up to you, grabbed your face and pulled you in for a kiss that you happily returned. He pulled away after a minute and began walking with you hand in hand.

“You’re mine now.” Bakugou said

“Whatever you say....Blasty.” You snickered.

Bakugou turned his head in shock. “You knew?” He asked.

“Of course I knew. I knew Blasty was you, I knew it was you whenever you stared at my naked body, I knew it was you whenever you cuddled into my chest, I knew it was you when I overheard you speaking like a human to Kirishima. It also helped that I just watched you transform back to your normal self. But me knowing it was you was the whole reason why I came up with this plan with Todoroki. It’s about time you made a move on me, Blasty.” You said with a teasing voice.

Embarrassed and frustrated at the fact he’d been caught, Bakugou let out an outburst.

“YOU FUCKING TEASE!” he screamed with his hands holding little explosions.

“Yeah, but now, I’m your tease. And it’s ok, because I know you like me. It’s easy to tell with that kiss and whole possessiveness. But that’s fine, because I really like you too Blasty.” You said with a smile as you wrapped your arms around his neck and Bakugou returned it with a smirk and a hug.

“Damn straight, Princess.” He said as he held onto you tight. “You’re mine.”

A/N: y’all this is not spellchecked bc after the week I’ve had, I just couldn’t. I’m sorry if this isn’t to your liking but I had to finish this so I sloppily wrote it down. I hope you enjoyed it at least! See you next time Bear Cubs💗🧸

[technowoah]

Rather Be Devisive Than Indecisive pt. 2

You weren't planning to help Techno again, but here you are with his horse.

- ANON REQUESTED!

- I really wanted to do second part anyways! So thanks a bunch!

- this story is long 😪 it'll all make sense though!

- part 1 is here!

- masterlist!

To say everything went south was a understatement. Everything went to hell, and you were currently living in it. You missed watching the sunset standing ontop L'Manburg's walls, you missed the peacefulness before the war. Maybe back then was too good to be true.

After the last encounter with Technoblade you had turned back to help Tommy and Tubbo. You tried to help wherever you could because you can see everyone drift apart, the main reason people came together was gone and dead. You tried to be a bigger sibling to both of them, and you tried to Tubbo and the former citizens repair the crater Wilbur left behind.

It took years, but L'Manburg was new and fresh again, with the help of Tubbo's new cabinet of trusted people L'Manburg was peaceful again. Tubbo had made you apart of his cabinet as well as Quackity, Fundy, Tommy and Karl. It was a new beginning.

There were days where you wondered if Wilbur would get a funeral. Schlatt had gotton a funeral, but you saw first hand how that went it wasnt a somber moment at all. It was for the best, they had mixed feelings about Wilbur and you dont blame them.

You had a new family, but there were things unkown to you, things that are being created out of your knowledge and that scared you. We have new L'manburg, but it isnt the same you dont know how long Tubbo could uphold peace in this new kingdom.

New things were created from the end of a old one.

It was a peaceful day in L'Manburg just as Tubbo promised the new citizens. You had stayed busy the whole day until a certian blonde came around your house frantically urging you to get outside and follow him

"C'mon! Just follow me! I have something to show you!"

"Tommy what are you talking about?!"

"Its VERY important, hurry! I dont want him to leave that spot."

Tommy had dragged you by the arm to the pier that evening and kept chanting that he had to show you something of utmost importance. You were trying to ask questions and keep up with his pace as he weaved through buildings claiming they were a "shortcut". Tommy stopped you at the pier and stood to your side, he was looking back and forth at the end of the pier to the water and back to you again.

You were about to ask why you were there until you saw a familiar man.

"Oh! Hello! Tommy who is this?"

He was pale, no, he was transparent. He looked pale, the sunset's dull rays made it seem like he still had skin. He had a yellow sweater on with brown pants and black shoes. He looked comfortable, he looked free. Next to his side there was a sheep on a leash with blue dye, you noticed it was poorly dyed too the dye was dripping from its wool. It was Wilbur, physically, but it wasn't HIM.

"He's Ghostbur." Tommy whispered to you while he stood between you two.

"Yes, I'm Ghostbur!" The ghost cheerfully said.

"This- this is y/n. Dont you remember?" Tommy cautiously asked Ghostbur.

Ghostbur had a look of confusion and curiosity on his face. He seemed so pure compared to when he was alive.

"No..I can't, but I would love to know." He stuck out his hand in a greeting.

"Hi I'm ghostbur!"

"I'm y/n." You said lowly.

You tried to reach out and grab his hand but it went straight through. You hated it, he's gone and you couldn't bring him back. It isn't him, but Ghostbur maybe better, Wilbur is gone and thats okay. Something came out of nothing, you kept telling yourself that everything was okay, but now seeing Ghostbur so naive and pure and free of the world's weight you believed everything would be fine.

"Im sorry. Im transparent, and I have no flesh." Ghostbur smiled.

"That's fine." You paused looking for the right words. "Do you know what you did? To L'Manburg?"

"Believe me, he dosen't. I tried." Tommy said to you.

"I couldn't belive I would do such a thing." Ghostbur added on.

"He shares no memories of Wilbur. Basically a new person." Tommy continued.

"That's great." You perked up. "It's bittersweet ya know. But Im happy you're here Ghostbur!"

"Im happy I'm here too, and Im happy I met you today." Ghostbur smiled at you while his sheep walked towards you, he unknowingly rubbed up against you putting blue dye on your clothes.

"Oh! This is Friend! I forgot to mention him to you. You can pet him!"

You didnt want to. He was dripping with dye, but you did it to appease Ghostbur. Tommy cringed while you petted the slightly wet, blue sheep. Once you were done your hand was blue, you rubbed it on your clothes that were already blue.

"I think he likes you." Ghostbur cheerfully said.

You were so thankful for Tommy bringing you to that pier. It was the closure you needed to move on and focus on building a new life for all of you. A peaceful life, but it seemed too good to be true. Days went by like normal and that sometimes was too much for you. You worked on new buildings and worked with Tubbo's cabinet too, that was a new normality for you.

The unknown scared you, but you had your family here. You had made amends with them and now and this is what you wanted. But then again it all seemed too good to be true.

Nobody had told you anything, you weren't in cabinet meetings, nor around Tubbo or Tommy. You felt shut out, you felt sick. The cabinet had decided to do something about Tommy and Dream started to become involved in Tommy's predicament. Soon after Tommy was in court, stripped away of his vice presidency, and had been put on probation.

Tubbo had come to you about Tommy being exiled. There was a huge meeting with the cabient and Dream about that situation and you had stayed silent the whole time. You wanted what was best for L'Manburg, but Tommy was like a brother to you, you couldn't send him away to fend for himself. You could see the confliction on Tubbo's face as he was going through the same dilemma as you were.

In the end Dream gave Tubboo 3 days to chose if to exile Tommy or not.

Tubbo had talked to you about the situation before the second day came. You two were in the same boat when it came to exiling him. You two had came to a conclusion, Tubbo just had to talk with the rest of his cabinent for a final conclusion.

The second day came and the plan switched immediately when Tommy came and introduced it. He wanted to fight back against Dream, of course he did, but he wanted another man to come and help. They wanted Technoblade to join their revolt. Quackity and Fundy agreed with the idea, but Tubbo was more cautious. You hated it.

Technoblade wasn't a subject nor person you wanted to be associated with ever since that night in Pogtopia. After all this time you had forgotten about him, you had forgotten your failed attempt at rekindling your friendship until now.

Tubbo was cautious, but you were 100% against it. Tubbo agreed with the rest of the cabinet and Tommy. They eventually asked you, and of course you said no, but it didn't matter, majority rules in this case.

You all approched Dream intop of the obsidian walls with your final decision.

"We have come to a decision. Look around." Tubbk leaded.

"There's giant, obsidian walls." Dream answered calmly.

"There is, there is Dream. And that's a problem, okay? This is funny actually." Tubbo turned back to Tommy. "Tommy, I am- I am so sorry."

Tubbo continues to talk to Dream. "I have come to the decision, that it'll be better for the nation the most logical thing to do is for Tommy to be exiled from L'Manburg."

"What?"

"Tubbo?!"

"Teaming up with Technoblade is an awful idea! It's an awful idea!"

Oh thank goodness.

"We just had this conversation!" Fundy yelled.

"No! No! Okay?! Nothing! Involving any kind of conflict is not safe for this nation! You've undermined my authority from the get go! Okay! All of you! No one here has respected me. You all jump on these merry little bandwagons of destruction. It's not okay!"

Tubbo was livid. His face was turning red and will keep doing so if he kept yelling. You felt a familiar breeze beside you as you saw Ghostbur standing next to you and behind Tommy. He smiled at you and continued yo listen to Tubbo's angry speech. You wondered why he was here, why he showed up at times and then left. Like he only needed to listen and not give any input.

"You cant go back on the plan now?! What the hell?!" Tommy yelled.

"When I was sworn in I made a promise to do what was best for the nation. And right now, Tommy you, your presence here is not the best for his nation."

Your heart dropped to your stomach and you think ghostbur noticed. You were happy that you didnt need to see Technoblade again, but you were going to lose what you would call a brother. You started to backtrack on your final decision, you belived Tubbo was in thr right. Tubbo wanted what was best for L'Manburg and what was best for L'Manburg was for Tommy to be exiled. You wished there was another way, but you know Tommy was stubborn it wouldn't work that easy.

Your mind kept wandering to if Tubbo decided to team with Technoblade. He was right there would be destruction, a huge war and probably the end of L'Manburg. You didn't want that again, you didn't want to see him again. You couldn't help but wonder if he knew L'Manburg was brand new.

"Dream, please detain and escort Tommy out of my country."

Tommy was gone. Its been weeks, four weeks to be exact. L'Manburg was peaceful, everywhere was peaceful, but you had to admit that you missed him. Fundy and Quackity tried to convince Tubbo to bring Tommy back, but he already made up his mind. He was confident in his decision, you were proud he was ruling L'Manburg confidently, but everyone was weary.

You haven't seen Ghostbur around either, he must've been floating around somewhere. It's none of your business.

The walls have been taken down and L'Manburg was independent again. There were sacrifices to be made. There were a lot of sacrifices to be made to keep L'Manburg up, and you kept asking yourself if everything was worth it. Was the discs worth that much to Tommy? Was L'Manburg even a good choice to begin with?

Was Technoblade right?

The Butcher Gang. They were calling themselves The Butcher Gang. The cabinet had several meeting and came ti the decisions that the biggest problems in L'Manburg were Technoblade and Dream. The cabinet decided not to kill Dream because of the fact that he was allies with L'Manburg, so they decided to try and kill Technoblade.

Dumbasses. You've mentioned to Tubbo that he was a very, very, very dangerous man. Tubbo has seen him before! You asked Tubbo constantly why did he wants to kill him when he says that he didn't want to team up with him. Tubbo said it was for the better of L'Manburg, but dosent he know that might cause even more trouble?

You didnt want to join them, you couldn't risk your life for something that is impossible to achieve. You separated from the cabinet, you couldn't watch them do this and you tried to stop them, but they insisted on the act.

Lately you've seen more of Ghostbur and that made you happy. It made you happy he wanted to spend time with you and it made you forget the trouble brewing in the cabinet.

"What's wrong?" Ghostbur asked while sitting on the edge of the pier with you, and Friend who was tied to one of the pier's poles.

"It's nothing Ghostbur." You said with a sigh.

"Good!" He cheerfully said.

"Can I actually tel you something?" You asked again, you wanted to get this off of your chest.

"Of course." He smiled.

You sighed and then began to speak as you looked out to the water. "It's the cabinet, its Tubbo, Fundy and Quackity that's the problem."

"But they are wonderful people! What can they do wrong?" Ghostbur suddenly asked.

"They want to kill someone, Ghostbur."

"Maybe it was a misunderstanding."

"I dont- I dont think so." You hung your head looking at your feet.

"Ghostbur, they want to kill Technoblade and I dont-"

"Technoblade?! That's my friend! Why- why would they want to kill him?"

Your heart felt heavy at his words. Another point not to kill Technoblade, you didn't want Ghostbur to hurt, not like Wilbur.

"He was a friend of mine too once. When L'Manburg first got blown up he- we betrayed L'Manburg and then spawned 3 wither skeletons to destroy the rest of the citizens." You explained to Ghostbur's disrught face.

"You wouldn't do that! You're kind!" Ghostbur exclaimed.

"It wasn't my best decision Ghostbur. People can make bad mistakes. A lot of people do. They aren't pure like you." You smiled softly at him.

A long hush fell over the two of you until Ghostbur perked up.

"We need to save Technoblade!" He exclaimed.

"Ghostbur I cant do that."

"Why not?"

"Because me and Techno aren't friends anymore." You said sadly.

"Why not?"

You couldn't answer that. You can, you can give the right answer, but at this moment you couldnt tell the ghost who suddenly stood up next to you.

"If I take you to where Technoblade lives will you feel better?" Ghostbur asked with Friend's leash in his hands.

Tubbo, Fundy and Quackity didnt know where Technoblade lives and desperately wanted to know to kill him. Maybe this was a good idea. You tried to convince yourself that as you walked side by side with Ghostbur. You had followed him through the woods as he weaved in and out of the trees. Friend was following Ghostbur as well, he wouldn't let Friend stay anywhere out of his sight.

You were getting special treatment, you were about to find out where Technoblade lived before The Butcher Gang would. Would you be considered a traitor again? Tubbo wouldn't want you back in the cabinet if you knew where Technoblade lived and you didnt tell him.

The atmosphere got colder as you two ventured on, you didnt know he would retreat all the way out here. It was snowing and you didn't bring any type of warm clothing considering L'Manburg was rather warm. Ghostbur had no problem, neither did Friend. Luckily you saw a light in the dark woods. It was further away, but you could see the light expand as you two treaded over towards it.

"That's the house!" Ghostbur pointed too.

You two reached the end of the woods and before you was an opening. There was blanket of white snow everywhere, there were footprints in the snow, but they were being covered by the falling snow above you. It was a valley and the only thing there was a beautiful wooden house. It was errie, the only civilization here was was Technoblade who lived in the house.

"It's pretty lonely." You said still cautious of the situation.

"Yeah it's sad, but we're here and it's okay!" Ghostbur said.

"Sure." You whispered as Ghostbur continues to lead the way.

You two got closer and closer to the house and you continued to try and back out. It's too late to do so now, you didnt even feel like walking back to L'Manburg after you confront Technoblade again. The two of you were heading up to his door, your heart was beating heavier as you got to his door. You brought your fist up to knock on the door, hopefully he was home because you were freezing cold. You harshly knocked on his door and awaited for his response.

You two waited for a while, but no one was opening the door.

"Ghostbur why don't you go inside?"

"I'll just peak my head in!" He answered and did so. His head phased through the door and then he came back out with a frown on his face. "No one is in there."

"Why did we come here?" You sulked and started to turn away from the door.

"Why the hell are you two here at night?!"

"Oh! Techno! Hi!"

Shit. You were looking into his eyes and you froze when he turned to you. This was the first time you've seen him in years ever since Pogtopia, you hated it. It was embarrassing you tried to become friends long ago, but that failed, and now you were here again. He probably saw you as desperate, coming back to him after betraying him.

"Hello Ghostbur. How are you?" Technoblade walked in between the two of you opening the door to his house. When he walked in he intentionally left the door open for you and Ghostbur. Luckily it was warmer inside and you welcomed it.

"Im good! But we are here for you." Ghostbur cheerfully said.

"Oh really?" Technoblade said while occupying himself with something else, not even bothering to look at the two of you standing awkwardly at his closed door.

"Yeah, Y/N tell him!" Ghostbur urged you on.

You paused for a second before speaking to Technoblade, who wasnt even paying attention. "There's these people called the Butcher Gang."

"Sounds stupid."

"Yeah it is. And they want you."

Techno scoffed. "Want me for what?"

You knew Technoblade was smarter than this. He was bouncing around the room not even sparing a glance towards you. He wasn't paying attention.

"They want to kill you Technoblade."

He stopped all of his movements, stood up to his full height and looked towards you and Ghostbur for the first time you've been in his house.

"You better not be screwing with me."

"Why would I?!" You got offended by his statement.

"I dont know, because you show up to my house out of nowhere and tell me that people are trying to kill me. This could be a setup! I cant trust-"

"Okay! The Butcher Gang is Tubbo, Quackity and Fundy. Thats all I know of who's in the group. They want to kill you because you are a threat to L'Manburg. Trust me!" You cut him off and explained.

"What do you want me to do about it?" Technoblade asked you.

"Dont kill them, but I wanted to warn you. They are being reckless and since you're out here they shouldn't bother you. They're looking for more trouble, Tubbo already has a lot on his plate, this isn't a good idea for you nor L'Manburg."

You finished your statement still weary of this whole situation. You hated being in this situation, Techno's presence didn't make you uncomfortable it was just seeing him and warning him of future danger. You two weren't even considered close, why were you here? You were here for L'Manburg.

"Okay. I'll try. No promises though." Techno smirked and continued doing whatever task he was doing.

You found somewhere to sit for the time being knowing that you two wouldn't talk. Looking around the room you realized that Friend was alone inside the house without Ghostbur. You looked outside and saw him walking from the woods again in a rushed pace. You didn't know he left, he phased back into the house.

"They say they're gonna kill you. Y/n was right." Ghostbur says.

"Were you two leading them to my house?!"

"No."

"No we didn't! We didn't even know they were coming today!" You stood up looking out the window in search of Tubbo and the rest of them.

"Ghostbur who was with them?" You asked as Techno ran around the rooms for weapons and armor.

"Um, Tubbo, Fundy, Quackity..Oh! And Ranboo."

"Ranboo?!" That poor kid. What is he doing?

"Eventhough I hate to say this. I don't trust you. Get out." Technoblade paused infront of you before rushing to the other room. "And tell them I'm not home!"

"And if that dosent work?!" You yelled back.

"Then to hell with them!"

You rushed outside with Ghostbur, hoping that the Butcher Gang dosen't notice you were leaving Technoblade's house. It was too late, they were already lined up outside with full netherite armor and gear.

"Y/n?!"

"Wait what are you doing here?" Tubbo asked as you made your way towards them.

"Im- I wanted to try and rekindle mine and Technoblade's relationship." You used an old lie to get yourself out of this situation. This was an already bad look on you, hopefully your lie would work.

"I thought your friendship ended a long time ago?" Tubbo asked again.

"It did, but I wanted to try again." This was embarrassing, now you really seem desperate.

"I see, then move out of our way." Tubbo asked you harshly.

"Uh- hey." Technoblade came out of his house with full netherite too, you weren't protected, so you will have to stay out of the way.

"Why have you guys come all the way over here to my humble abode?" Technoblade started walking towards his stable where he kelt his horse. He tried to lighten the mood, but it didn't seem to work. As he moved you moved with him trying not to be inbetween the dangerous men with swords and enchanted armor.

"You need to pay for your war crimes." Tubbo said while following Technoblade.

"That was like- that's in the past! Alright, that was a different Technoblade. Im a changed man now! Im in retirement! Im a good person now Tubbo!" Technoblade dragged on as Tubbo just hummed in response.

Quackity spoke up. "Technoblade you exploded L'Manburg with fucking withers."

"You literally spawned Withers everywhere!" Tubbo exclaimed.

"Im sorry, Im sorry Technoblade as much as you changed you have to be brought to justice for that." Quackity interrupted Tubbo.

The Butcher Gang tried to speak to Technoblade at the same time, when Technoblade spoke up over them all.

"Listen guys! I've gone through so much effort over the past month to change my violent ways! I've reformed alright? The voices, they demand blood! And I- I have been denying THEM! Ive been fighting back! Please! Please dont make me kill all of you, please just leave."

You guess he has changed, but you knew somewhere in your mind that he wasn't talking about just the Butcher Gang, he was including you too. You were somewhat confident that you wouldn't be attacked or killed, but you were terribly wrong before.

There was back and forth banter between the two of them. Techno had tried to show the gang his bees and tried to make a run for it.

"Techno!"

"Hey!"

"He's running!"

The gang started running towards him, but instead of continuing he stopped and turned to them. You were trailing behind trying to catch up to them, you kept running after them. You were not equipped for this night, you didn't know Ghostbur was going to bring you out in the open cold. You could hear Ghostbur behind you as you continued to run towards them.

"Y/N you're gonna damage yourself!" Ghostbur's voice became more echoed and further away as you tried to get closer to the gang before they got killed.

"There's no other way."

"Tubbo dont be stupid!" You were right behind the Butcher Gang.

"There's no other way!"

Fuck

"I CHOSE BLOOD!"

A cloud of smoke enveloped the 6 of you and you suddenly could see. You could only see the glint of everyone's armor.

"Y/N get behind us!" Tubbo tried to blocked you off from reaching Technoblade.

"Why didn't you bring any armor?!" Quackity yelled.

"I didn't think i was gonna be fucking out here!"

Technoblade must've set off multiple smoke bombs because the smoke wouldn't stop, the smoke made you woozy, but the others didnt seemed phased by it at all and kept fighting Technoblade. Your lungs felt full, and you felt like passing out, but you wouldn't allow yourself to do so.

"Tubbo stop this!" You yelled out when the smoke cleared a little.

"No! He needs to pay!" He said while fighting with Fundy.

The air was still hazy and you lost sight of people occasionally. Whipping your head around you were met with what felt like the butt of a axe. You quickly saw a split second of a shiny axe and then a pain in your chest spiked up. You double back and tried to recover, but then you've been sliced in the thigh and a deep cut in your side taking you down to the ground. You were bleeding out and desperately trying to heal the wound in your side. You felt your consciousness slowly slip from you as you laid on the snow. The warm contrast of your blood compared to the cold snow was sad. You always get hurt, no matter what you do. It's inevitable, and you finally gotten used to it.

The last thing you heard was yelling, but it slowly faded out.

You were warm, and not in the middle of nowhere anymore. You opened your eyes to see yourself staring at a polished wood ceiling, the soft pillows and blankets around you made everything feel so much better. Your whole body hurts, you dont want to move nor do you want to remember. Thank goodness that someone had patched you up, you didn't want to die. You tried shifting your body but the pain in your side was denying any movement.

"Oh! You're awake thank God!" A voice called out from your side. You looked over to see the half human hafl enderman sitting in a chair by a window. "I thought you weren't gonna wake up! Tubbo and the rest if the cabinet was worried as well."

"Were you the one who patched me up?" You asked carefully.

"Yeah! Luckily I can see in that fog, so I took you away and patched you up." Ranboo smiled.

"Who- who hit me?" You asked trying to sit up again.

Ranboo paused. "Technoblade." Ranboo said in a somber tone.

"I see." You sighed.

Ranboo helped you sit back on the headboard of the bed and you two continued to talk.

"Are you mad at him?"

"Im just upset. Its okay, he said he'll kill all of us so I knew he would." You kept your gaze at you lap.

"Yeah I get it." Ranboo replied.

"I have a question ranboo!" You perked up.

"Yeah? Shoot."

"Why did you join the Butcher Gang?" You asked the taller man. He stayed silent thinking of a right answer before actually speaking.

"They were nice to me. I trust people who are nice to me, that show me kindness and treat me with respect. I know its lame, my answer isn't fully fleshed out, but that's the reason." Ranboo shrugged and you nodded.

You would love to know Ranboo more, he seems like a great guy, but he's just lost.

"Oh! I forgot! You have a letter!" Ranboo walked around the bed and brought out a folded piece of paper and handed it to you.

You unfolded it and began to read.

𝘔𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘤𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘦𝘤𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘦

𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶

- 𝘋

"Execution site?" You looked towards Ranboo.

"Oh yeah! Technoblade's execution is today an-"

"How the hell did you get him?!" You interrupted him. "Im sorry."

Ranboo looked shocked before composing himself. "Dont worry! Well, we took his horse hostage and he immediately wanted to surrender if we didn't let Carl go." Ranboo gathered stuff around the room. "And the execution is today, happening in a few minutes and I need to be there. I'll be back soon to check up on you!"

You nodded and continued to listen to him.

"Are- are you coming?" Ranboo sent one last glance towards you before making his way out.

"You know you dont HAVE to go." You said trying to ease the tension.

"I know. I really do know." He sighed. "Are you sure you dont want to?"

"No, Im okay." You sent him a smile.

You had lied again. Of course you didn't want to see Technoblade get killed, but that note that was left made you go to the cave. You trudged you way up to said cave, even though the pain in your side was unbearable you continued on. Once you had gotton up to the cave, you peaked inside cautiously. You saw a man in a cloak with a familiar mask on with Technoblade's horse. You knew it was Dream.

"Hello."

"Hello Dream."

"I will cut right to the chase. Take Carl and wait here. I have other work to do." He handed you the reigns to Carl and started to leave.

"Excuse me!? What do I do? Why do I wait here?!" You yelled after him and he just waved you off.

You rolled your eyes and found a stone in the cave to rest against with Carl's reigns lazily in your hands.

You didnt know what time it was, but the sun was slowly going down, it wasn't particularly sunset, but you knew it was late. Your eyes began to close until your heard screaming in the distance. You sat up slowly, now fully alert. You held Carl's reigns tighter as you backed into the cave more and more.

Footsteps were heard in the distance coming up to the cave and you thought if Dream had set you up for failure. The footsteps grew louder until a panting Technoblade appeared at the entrance at the cave. He looked horrible, he was thinking the same thing about you.

You two exchanged no words. You didn't want to say anything, what would you even say? He rushed over to Carl and started petting him. "Carl you're okay!"

You hummed as you and Techno shared a glance. He smiled at you. He smiled at you. It's been so long since you've seen him smile. He didn't need words to communicate, his eyes and smile said enough. You matched his smile and gave him a knowing nod and he did the same.

"Feel better eh?" Technoblade started conversation.

"Not really. What about you?"

"Eh- used a totem of undying just now."

"What?! Really?" You exclaimed. "I guess that's why you're here now huh?"

"Yeah I'll tell you about it sometimes." He smiled and climbed atop of his horse and you could see him thinking. "Im sorry too. You almost died cause of me. Thats is unacceptable, I shouldn't- I shouldn't have attacked you. I couldn't-"

"You cant control it. It's gonna take me awhile to recover, but..." You touched your bandaged cut. "It'll take me some time."

Technoblade nodded knowing what you meant. He could always read your mind somehow, thats what made you two work. Knowing eachother. He sent you one last silent goodbye before riding out of the cave. You knew that trust was somewhat restored, and that you two were better than before. This might be a new beginning.

A very angry Quackity came running around the corner of the cave and spotted you leaving. He whipped his head around to you.

"Hey! Where the fuck is Techno?!" He yelled at you.

"I don't know-"

"Dont bullshit me!"

"I. Don't. Know." You said more sternly. He gave you a hard glare before running away.

You went the opposite way trying to make it back to the room you woke up in before Ranboo came back.

Earlier you were desperately trying to befriend Techno, but things come more naturally you learned. You cant rush things, nor control this world. Things will fall into place, your and Technoblade's friendship will blossom again.

You will never find peace, but that's okay. You should be used to it by now. Everything is chaotic, but everything will be okay.

[twatshag]

"Can I ask you something?"

♤ In which haikyuu boys ask you personal questions ♤

Pairings: iwaizumi x reader, osamu x reader, kuroo x reader All gn!!

Warnings: mentions of death(not the characters), suggestive topics, mentions of daddy issues, mention of past troubles, insecurities, mentions of exs cheating, crying

Genre: fluff, slightly angsty but still fluffy.

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A/N: In honour of mental health month I wanted to write this piece to make you guys feel loved by the boys ! You are loved and cared for and as much as I hated hearing it but things WILL get better. Stay strong I want you to fight.- Kira

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Miya Osamu

You and your boyfriend were cuddling against one another in your bed it was a routine you both loved doing on your free days. Basking in each others warmth while talking about your days and what the future holds.

Osamu's laugh rang through the bedroom walls while he played with your hair. "And then she literally drops her cake right onto my laptop and it freakin' broke it!!" "Ma god angel was tha cake that hard?" "You have no idea how much I wanted to punch her for one, baking a cake that was literally so hard if I ate a rock it would've been softer and two for breaking my freaking laptop !".

Osamu chuckled once again as he kissed your forehead and you frowning because of how can he find the awful events that you've been dealing with all week funny at all.

"There there angel A don't want ya getting forehead wrinkles from frowning too hard ya know." He chuckled while poking your ticklish sides earning a slap on his hand. "Jeez I think I'd literally cry if I ever got them." Osamu smiled against your hairline as the conversation came to a halt maybe this was the right moment to ask what he's been thinking about all week he thought.

"Angel can a ask you something?". You tilted your head to look at him while he gazed right back at you while popping an eyebrow at his question "is your question going to be 'can ya help me get off?' ? Because your answer is no."

Osamu chuckled and rolled his eyes at your so bold statement just a while back in your relationship you'd be blushing profusely if he made any type of suggestive comment wondering what happened to his innocent S/o.

"Nah angel I'm serious here". Noticing his serious features you decided to nod and see what he has to say.

Gulping he decided to ask away. "What made ya believe in love again? Ya know after yer ex had cheated on ya?" Your eyes widened at his sudden question earning a worried panicked look from him. Looking around the room to avoid this awkward situation he put himself into "Y-ya dont hafta answer ya know A- a Just couldn't-" "you."

His eyes met yours with a dumb founded expression you deciding to continue on since there was no backing down now. I mean you always knew that one day he'd ask you about it but it still made you sink a bit when he did.

"I mean sure of course there would be times where you smelled different or something and I'd panic or times you got so many notifications on your phone and i'd let my past get the better of me and snoop but after 3 months of dating, you told me something that just healed everything I've been through."

You smiled at him and he looked back at you with a curious look to what his so called healing words were.

"You told me you loved me. And I know that sounds so stupid" you laughed heavily releasing the lump in your throat.

"But the way you looked at me was like an unspoken promise to never hurt me like he did." You shrugged smiling at him and burying your face against his chest.

Osamu was dumbfounded by your response sure he knew he might be the reason but confirmation doesnt make the love sick smug grin on his face and the warmth rising to it any less effective.

He held you as tight as he can. "God angel ya really know how to get a man flustered say how bout ya help me get o-" "no" "Angelllllllllllll" you scoffed at him and hit his chest. "Shut up and sleep Miya" to which he laughed at the sound of his last name even when you were upset and you addressed him by his last name he can't help but smile at how beautiful it sounded coming from you. "Yer breaking ma heart here angel don't make me take yer cuddling rights." Chuckling as your grip around him tightened and drifting off to sleep together while he played with your hair.

Making mental note to always be the one who heals you forever because you were the one who healed him too and God did he love you so much for everything that you did.

Iwaizumi Hajime

Today was your regular late night drive throughs and talks about your life while stuffing your face with fast food with your beefy athletic trainer boyfriend.

As you brought the sandwich to your mouth and took a big bite you moaned at the heavenly taste earning a chuckle from the green eyed man next to you.

"Can't believe I'm not the one who's making you moan that way but a sandwich."

You rolled your eyes at his snarky comment while stuffing your mouth with the sandwich "shushth up iwa-chanth".

"Jeez who knew romance was dead L/n and I told you stop calling me that and don't speak with a mouth full last time you did you had to clean my car seat" he laughed earning an intensive glare his way from you.

You swallowed and thought about a good come back for a second. "I wasn't the one who threw up in my cup holder was I? Iwaaa-chaaaannnn" making sure to drag the annoying nickname out just to tease him.

He rolled his eyes at you "you're such a brat, doll and you know how I can't deal with spicy food who's fault was that?" You laughed "oh shut up, you loved me for the after care you got Hajime." "I'll think about it."

Smacking his chest lightly as you both laughed into the night.

Should I ask ? I really don't want to pry. I mean it's been weeks since they've told me about it and I dont want them to feel alone maybe I shouldn't ask them iwaizumi thought to himself while staring at the sandwich in his hands. But before he could decide he was snapped back to reality by your voice "not hungry Haji?" Before he could settle on a decision the words have already come out of his mouth.

"Doll can I ask you something?" You raised an eye brow at his sudden serious tone and you nodded "of course, anything haji-baby" feeling the atmosphere turn tense you decided to pull out the favourite nick name card and he smiled nervously.

"Do you miss her?" You felt your heart sink. Your friend had gotten into an accident talking with her boyfriend while driving resulting them in a critical state which lead to them passing away. You smiled weakly.

"Yes I do.." he stared at you worried that he might've crossed a line or broke a boundary but before he could overthink you opened your mouth to speak again.

"But you know, my care taker always told me something that always stuck to me about death. They said Nobody dies before age" he frowned confusingly. "What do you mean?" He asked eager to know what your statement meant.

"It means that when a person passes away they've served their purpose and they accomplished what they wanted to on earth so they go into their next step. A life even better than what they've gotten." You gazed at him smiling of course it hurt, alot but your friend was very successful and very happy when you went to the funeral and walked up to her casket the way she lied there was a peaceful sight. Slight smile on her face despite her body being cold.

As much as it hurt saying good bye you couldn't help but smile at how happy she looked to earn peace of an even better life in the next. Leaving her pain behind her.

Iwaizumi reached to hold your hand thinking he couldn't possibly be more in love how foolish he thought.

"You're really strong you know that?" You laughed heavily squeezing his hand while a few tears slipped out of your eyes. "Its a part of life you know its just it always hurts when they leave but it makes me at ease knowing that something better is out there for them."

You looked up at your boyfriend who was tearing up in front of you exchanging silent smiles and promises to never be sad when anything happens to you both individually because at the end of the day the light at the end of the tunnel is always brighter than the start.

Kissing in the dead of night as a confirmation to what you both were thinking and agreeing to your promise. While he held you in his arms remembering to always make you feel better because even though his job was draining coming home to you and embracing you was something that always, always made him feel better. Hoping that it would be your cure as well.

Kuroo Tetsuro

"Kitten! Come help me with this!" Kuroo whined as he was trying to hang up the drawn portrait of your pet dog on the wall. Today was just a normal lazy day in the kuroo & L/n household. "Tetsu- stop whining can't you see I'm busy here" you rolled your eyes at your 6'2 pouting boyfriend who's suddenly bad at everything he can do alone knowing damn well he just uses it as an excuse to be close to you.

Despite what everyone thought of Kuroo he sure was the clingy type in fact if you got up to the bathroom during the night he'd whine about how you don't love him anymore because you left his arms.

Walking over to you trying to put the portrait into different frames you had placed on the floor deciding which one would look the best on the wall. He crouched down to your level and hugged you from behind while resting his chin on your shoulder.

"Kitten don't use that sassy tone with me I'm still your senpai chibi-chan." You giggled and rolled your eyes at his silly nickname "you know that it's been 5 years since high school right ?" He smirked at you and kissed your neck earning a whimper from you at the warm sensation. "But you're still my chibi-chan" "whatever you say captain"

you smiled at his warmth while sliding the portrait out of the frame you put it in. "Say chibi-chan, why don't you start calling me captain in bed?" You looked at him with the best deadpan expression you could make while he wiggled his eyebrows at you as a way to say 'whatcha think???' "No". You answered back.

you stood up grabbing the frame you thought fit best on the wall and he followed you like a lost puppy "oooohhh come on chibi-chan, how would that hurt? You refused to call me daddy you know!" You laughed at his annoying smug grin and rolled your eyes at his pouty face.

"I'm not calling you captain testu- besides why isn't testu enough for you? Sex is supposed to be intimate why would I call you something that I don't like thinking about." You chuckled,

but he knew better than anyone that your chuckle wasn't because you thought it was funny but because you were hiding the slight pain in your voice.

If you had anything common with kuroo it was that your home wasn't as perfect either. Your father was indeed home and he lived with you guys but if he wasn't it would've probably been for the better. And he knew about that.

"Kitten can I ask you something?" You rolled your eyes thinking this was going to be another bribe for you to call him some nick name during sexual intercourse but decided to play along. "Aye aye captain ask away." Popping the cardboard open to place the portrait inside the decided frame you heard him swallow and he opened his mouth to talk.

"Is it because of him?" You almost dropped the portrait from your hands. Grip hardening on the piece of paper in your hold.

You looked at him sadness reflecting your eyes trying to hide it behind your weak smile. You nodded. "Yeah. It is".

You didn't notice how your hand started shaking becoming angry and over rushed with every negative emotion in your body tears swelling up your eyes not noticing how your boyfriend was already by your side placing the paper you held so tightly on to the side while pulling you in to his chest and relaxing as you softened against him.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked you that." You sniffles against shaking your head. "No it's okay, it's just.." he placed his hand on your head tracing his thumb against your hair lightly something that always soothed you when your sad.

"I just don't want to remember him, You know and I still feel like it's my fault that he's the way he is, maybe if I-" "no."

Kuroo cut you off by lifting your chin up to look at him worry and pain plastered onto his face. How can anyone hurt you he thought.

"It's not your fault kitten, if anything he's the asshole. You didn't deserve him and his shitty behaviour if I was in his place I would've made sure to protect you even from myself."

You laughed while he wiped your tears and you leaned to his touch "you just made this sound gross testu" he chuckled and pulled you into his chest once again allowing you to hear his racing heart that only raced for you.

"guess I'm gross for making my kitten laugh while crying" you giggled wrapping your arms tightly around him, enjoying his warmth and love for a few seconds before mumbling. "Captain sounds nice.." giggling to yourself and suddenly yelping as he picked you up bridal style and kissing your lips making his way to the bedroom

"Tetsu put me down!!! We still didn't hang the portrait yet!!" He chuckled as you squirmed in his hold "nope I'm sure the portrait could wait right now I have to take this new nickname for a test drive" as he closed the door to the bedroom leaving you and your worries behind.

You knew that at the end of the day kuroo would never hurt you. Unless it's in bed but that's beside the point.. he truly loved you and while you laid in his arms that night completely bare he vowed to himself to always protect you. Even if that meant from himself.

—----------------------------------------------—

A/N: I hope that you guys enjoyed this piece dedicated to mental health month! Please don't ever doubt your feelings they are valid and you have every right to feel the way you feel thank you all for being the way you guys are ! Much love to everyone! Stay strong

P.S: ILL UPDATE AS SOON AS I GET MY REQUESTS OPEN!!!

- with love kira

—----------------------------------------------—

[kewltie]

thinking of bkdk in their late 40s when all their friends have already settled down with a family, izuku muses a lil forlornly how he would like to have someone to come home and katsuki just stares him dead in the eyes and says, "marry me then. i wont let you be lonely in that empty apartment."

the thing is bkdk are super successful heroes, they're the ranking no.1 and 2 and everyone knows their name but because izuku put so much effort into his career he never give himself the chance to meet someone and fall in love because the next things he know he's already 48 yrs old and still very single. as soon as he got right out of UA he had put himself right to work and hasn't truly stop since so izuku feels like he misses out on his youth, the flutter of first love, and now he feels like it's too late to grasp that chance again because he's too old to be stumbling around at love BUT here is katsuki suddenly telling izuku to marry him as though that would solve everything, solve izuku's worries and fears that he'll never experience love the way his friends had or knows what it feels to come home to a waiting arms that will comfort him after a hard day at work.

izuku first tries to laugh it off because katsuki cant be serious right?? but katsuki doesn't crack a single smile. "Do i look like im the type to joke about this kind shit to you?" he asks, voice steady and true. it is then that izuku realizes katsuki had meant every word he said.

but izuku still cant wrap his head around why would katsuki want to marry him of all things?? it is because they're both bachelor and wretchedly alone standing at the very top of their career where nobody can touch or hope to nobody can understand them like they do to each other?? izuku thinks that's a very dry reason to marry someone for the sake of convenience and not love at all because even though he'd devoted all his time to saving the world and helping ppl and HE'S OLD NOW but he still earnestly yearn to fall in love the ways all his friends had.

"If you needed company, we don't have to marry each other. I'm here for you always, you know that," izuku offers instead. "We're partners."

katsuki is silent briefly, then, he says, "You think i want to marry because you're convenience?"

Izuku blinks. "is that not it?"

"No," he says, all grave and serious, and for a moment izuku is breathless with realization.

"Oh," izuku replies, looking down at the table like it has all the answer in the world. "how long?"

"Since our third year at UA."

izuku jerks his head up, eyes wide with shock.

"what—I, wait, you can't mean that right?" he shakes his head as he flounders for the right words. they're both almost hitting their 50s now, so if it started in their third year then it would be 30 years of katsuki waiting for him, of pining over izuku and all that time was lost because of it.

katsuki press his lips into a thin line. "I have never lie to you."

"I—I'm not—" izuku flushes, because this wasn't anything he had plan for. who would anyway? no one would ever believe that katsuki has been in love with him for almost 30 years and izuku only found out about it now. even though katsuki has revealed the secret he has been hiding for 3 decades, izuku has no answer for him. he didn't notice katsuki's feelings for this long not because he chose to willfully ignore it but because he has never thought of katsuki in that light and that is the sad truth of it all. katsuki must have realizes that too because he doesn't press for more from izuku.

"i'm sorry," izuku says, mind racing to come up with a proper reply to katsuki's feelings because he deserves that much. "it's not you—"

Katsuki scowls. "shut the fuck up, don't even start that with me."

izuku quickly shuts his mouth, floundering for another reply that with save both of their feelings.

"Six months," katsuki says instead, eyes firm and never once dull since izuku has known him. "give me six months to convince you and if it doesn't work out we can get divorce then."

"you still want to marry me?!" izuku asks in disbelief. "shouldn't we like date first at least? isn't that how normal relationship work?!"

katsuki roll his eyes. "we co-own an agency, you have your toothbrush at my house, and we spent 18hrs out of 24 together almost everyday. our friends joke about us being a married to each other as much as to our work, we're each other's first emergency contact if something were to happen," he continues, straightforward like he's listing their grocery for today, "and i cant ever imagine wanting anyone more than i ever want you."

throughout this strange turn in their conversation, izuku realizes not once has he ever heard katsuki said he loves him but the way katsuki had revealed his unwavering devotion that lasts 3 decades and the dry, bluntness in which he spoken of wanting izuku, it's heavy. this hefty thing that katsuki has carried with him for nearly 3 decades, and in those years what izuku thought katsuki was just disinterest in any romantic connection because not once had izuku seen him look at another person, but it's because he has eyes only for izuku and nobody else.

izuku should have known never to expect anything less then 120% with katsuki because if there's anything that means something to katsuki, he would give it all and then some. it's humbling really, to be loved so fiercely and with such devotion that 3 decades is worth every second of it but izuku doesn't know if he's worth it especially when he's hesitant about his own murky feelings. he loves katsuki undoubtedly. they're partners in more way then one, but he doesn't know if he can love katsuki the way he deserves to be love in return, to return that same level of intensity.

"and what if the six months went by and there's nothing show for it?" izuku mumbles, hands clasp together under the table. i dont want to ruin this friendship of ours, he doesn't say. "what if you get bored with me and realized this isn't something you want now. what happen then?"

"you're stuck with me for life even if we get a divorce. i won't let you ever get rid of me either way," katsuki says, lips twitching with the slightest hint of amusement. "and if you're worry about me getting bored of you, don't. i fucking wont." It’s firm, assured, and completely sincere.

izuku thinks anybody with a half a brain at all would see this admirable man right in front of them with his unwavering affection and devotion that he had nurtured for 3 decades would be half way in love already, but izuku neither race or skip a beat; it remains dull and unmoved. maybe he's really too old to love like this. maybe, it's not that he's too busy to ever search for it like everyone else but because he has all the love for everyone but none ever hold a special place in his heart. for all of katsuki's sharp edges, his feelings burn ever so brightly while izuku has since been numb to his own emotions. to give too much to the world, to his job that he has never let himself fall freely and unconditionally. it's terrifying.

"what if i hurt you instead?" he says, quiet and severe. "what if in the end i couldn't return what you've given me?"

katsuki doesn't answer right away. the air around them tenses, threatening to suffocate them in the waiting silence. then a hand grab his and draws it toward katsuki's chest. "don't fucking underestimate me, idiot. i can and will make you fall in love with me in 6 months. 6 months is more than enough to make you realize what a fucking dumbass you have been the entire time for not taking notice of me while i have been looking at you for almost half of our life," he says with the cocky assurance that propelled him to the no. 2 position and beyond.

for the first time since this exchange had started and taken a strange, strange turn that left him his world shaken to its core, izuku's heart feels lighten. He stifles a giggle. "i still think we should date at least. marriage is maybe jumping the gun a little too soon."

"No." Katsuki's eyes narrow, and he squeezes izuku's hand firmly. "i'm not giving you any chance to escape from this. we can do all the dumb dating things you could ever want but we're getting marry first."

izuku tries to draw his hand back but katsuki remains undeterred. "Kacchan, please," he says. half begging for his hand back and half pleading against his insane idea. who in their right mind would ever marry first then date each other?! That's just not how it work! yet, katsuki is an unmovable fortress against increasing izuku's distress.

"deku," he says, thumb running across izuku's knuckles in a soothing circle, "give me this chance. let me prove it to you that i can do it. take this leap of faith with me and i won't disappoint you. trust me with your heart like you trust me with your life and i promise i will keep it safe."

izuku draws out a long, lingering breath that leaves his head heady with a dawning realization. "o-okay," he finally acquiesces, shaken with the knowledge that his heart suddenly doesn't feel safe at all for the first time in a long time in the hands of the man in front of him. bakugou katsuki is dangerous, but to the tender beat of his heart.

Katsuki's lips stretch upward into a small, precious smile that rarely see the light of day, leaving izuku breathless just for a moment. "we'll go get the marriage license tomorrow."

"tomorrow?!" izuku shrieks.

maybe he has been wrong all along, maybe you're never too old fall in love and experience it for the first time and that sometimes the things that matter the most to you are always worth the wait even if take 3 decades and katsuki always been more patient then people give him credits for.

[suite43]

(summary: starscream and bumblebee have an argument, and turn to trusted friends for some advice. or: several long and winding paragraphs about love, redemption, and what we are worth. alcohol warning.)

"Be honest with yourself," Starscream sneered. "If we hadn't been forced together, do you really think you'd give a scrap about me?"

"Why does it matter?" Bumblebee shot back.

"Because, Bumblebee, you're wrong. You think you care, you think you're in love with me, but you're not. You were forced to be around someone you hated and you had to find some way to be okay with it because you're a good little autobot and you overcompensated. You're a victim of proximity. We both are. But y'know what? You're free now, so go ahead and run along back to your life and your friends and people you actually give a shit about beyond finding the moral high ground and leave me alone."

"Unbelievable," Bumblebee muttered. "You're unbelievable! Do you know how to do anything except wallow in denial? What is your fucking problem?"

"My problem at the moment is that someone was deluded enough to think he could squeeze millions of years of monstrosity out of me by telling me he loved me."

"Primus, Starscream, if you're not interested just say so! If you're angry, if you're scared, fucking say it! But you don't ever get to tell me how I feel!" Bee was screaming up at Starscream, pain and frustration radiating from him. "I don't know where I'd be if things were different and I. Don't. Care. I like my life, Starscream. Despite everything, I'm happy with it and I'm glad you're in it! Apparently you aren't, and if that's true you can leave! You've always been free to go whenever you fucking feel like it! But you haven't! So pardon me for assuming you had something going on in that thick fucking head of yours!"

"Oh, please-"

"No! Shut up! I'm not done and for once you are going to listen to what I have to say! You try so hard to convince everyone that you've got some black heart, that all you are is violence and malice, and I know  that's not true! Whether you want to believe it or not I've seen what you're capable of! I know you, you let me know you, and I decided that I fucking love you and I'm willing to keep loving you even when you're a cruel, stubborn bastard. If you really want to leave, leave! Go! But don't run because you're afraid, or because you think I don't know what I'm getting into."

Starscream didn't say anything, just stewing. Bee tried to collect himself, mentally urging Starscream to just fucking say something.

"You don't know me."

"For fucks sake, Starscream," Bumblebee sighed and decided fuck it and gave into his impulse, pulling Starscream by his collar down into a kiss. He was frustrated and Starscream was caught off-guard, so it was messy and clumsy and awkward, but after a beat Starscream grabbed his helmet and pulled him into it harder and Bee nearly forgot he was ever angry in the first place.

It felt like a million years had passed when they finally pulled apart and Bee let his heels fall back into the ground. Starscream stared down at him, face unreadable.

"Sorry," Bee said, barely even whispering, hands settled on Starscream's chest. "I just. How do I prove to you that I mean it?"

"You can't," Starscream responded, pulling away from Bumblebee's touch. Bee just watched him go.

He sighed. Starscream would be back when he was ready. Or he wouldn't. Either way, Bee would be here.

///

"Are... Are you okay, Starscream?" Thundercracker asked, peeking out the door to the balcony.

"I'm fine."

"Um... Why are you on my roof?"

Starscream was sitting cross-legged on the roof of Thundercracker's apartment, staring off into the distance, one hand held over his mouth in thought, fingers idly tracing his lips as he couldn't drag his mind away from flittering fancies of Bumblebee and kisses and love. Thinking about dozens of late-night conversations and well-meaning gifts of cheap high grade and the way he laughs and the way he looks beautiful even when he's angry and- hm.

"You know about things, don't you, Thundercracker?"

"Most people generally agree the answer to that question is 'no', but. Maybe? What kind of things?"

"What does it feel like to be in love?"

"Oh. That kind of thing. Uh," Thundercracker climbed onto the roof awkwardly, pulling himself up next to Starscream, legs kicking where they dangled off the edge. "You know I don't really mess with all of that, right? Dating and stuff. I don't do it."

"But you know things," Starscream said. "You're better with feelings then anyone else I know."

"Not true," Thundercracker said. "You know Bumblebee!"

"That's exactly the problem, Thunders."

"Oh. Oh." Starscream could almost hear the gears turning in Thundercrackers head as he connected the dots. "Are you in love with Bumblebee?"

"No. Yes. I don't know. If I knew I would know what to do about it and I wouldn't be here asking you for romantic advice now would I?"

"I suppose."

"So then how am I supposed to know?"

"If you're in love?"

"Yeah."

"Well, I've never been in love. I don't know. But, in the movies, it's like... Usually two people kind of get stuck together in some kind of situation, y'know, they meet and they don't really like each other much at first. But then you think about them all the time. And then you keep running into them, and even when you think they're annoying, something about them is still kind of endearing. They make you happy. And then there's some big fight or misunderstanding or somebody gets scared or has to leave and it looks like nothings going to work out, but eventually they decide that they like being around each other enough that it's worth working out whatever they fought about or giving up whatever's keeping them apart, and then, happily ever after, I guess."

"Just like that, huh?"

"Only in the movies. There's no end credits in real life."

"So what happens next, then?"

"I guess just what happens with every other kind of relationship. You keep being happy and working and then fighting and deciding its worth trying again over and over until you give up or somebody dies."

"Unfortunately I don't think death is a viable reprieve for my situation."

"Oh yeah, I guess not. Sorry."

"No, it's okay. He's easier to tolerate when one of us is dead."

"I guess the question, then, should be, is he worth it to you? Are you going to get off the plane to Santa Fe or New York or Chicago and run back to him, or are you gonna go be a well-respected but no-fun businesswoman in the big city forever?"

"What?"

"Sorry, I think I got lost in the metaphor," Thundercracker laughed, a big, booming thing, clumsy and well-meaning and earnest, just like the mech it came from. "Something in there was probably good advice, though. You should ask me things more often."

"I really should," Starscream sighed, leaning over and laying his head in his trinemates lap. Thundercracker didn't stop him, and let one hand fall to rest on Starscream's midsection, just to say I'm here when you need me so Starscream can reply I know, Thank you, I'm sorry by taking that hand in his and squeezing it lightly. They watched the stars twinkle across the horizon as lazy clouds sauntered by, and Starscream started to wonder about what he was worth.

///

Bumblebee trudged into Maccadam's, his normal sunshine dampened by how just miserable and unfair everything seemed. He took his usual spot at the bar and ordered a drink, half as strong as usual so he'd have to spend twice as much money if he wanted to do something stupid, letting his thoughts brew around as he sipped.

"Hey, bigshot! How did it go?" Wheeljack slung his arm around Bee's shoulder, energetic as ever, but Bee just groaned and slammed his head into the bar.

"Terribly."

"Weelllll," Bee could practically feel Wheeljack trying not to say 'I told you so'.

"He's just. Agh!" Bee said. "He was just himself, y'know, determined to be as difficult as possible and allergic to his own happiness. And I yelled at him, which I probably shouldn't have done, and then I kissed him, which I definetly shouldn't have done, and now he's probably never going to even look at me again."

"Well, y'know what they say, fortune favours the bold and all that!" When Bee gave Wheeljack a skeptical, dont-try-to-make-me-feel-better kind of look, Wheeljack just doubled down, squeezing his shoulders. "Seriously, you shot your shot! That's all you can do, and if he didn't want you that's his loss!"

"He was scared, Wheeljack. I know him, I know that that's his fucked up defense mechanism or whatever and I knew he was gonna try to drive me away. Why did I let him drag me into that?"

"Because you care, Bee. You care a lot. You aren't the kind of person who can see somebody struggling and just leave them to it. You're like, literally incapable of not lending a hand. Especially when you love somebody."

"So then why the hell did I have to fall for the hardest to love cybertronian there is?"

"Oh, I'm sure there's been worse.I mean, Nova-"

"Not really the point."

"Oh. Because you have horrible taste?"

"That's more like it," Bee grinned. "Cheers?"

"To shit taste!" Wheeljack agreed, clinking their drinks together.

"Absolutely."

They left the bar a bit later, neither of them really drunk so much as in the zone, as Wheeljack liked to put it. It was right before you got too drunk to really do anything sensible but drunk enough that you didn't overthink things, and it was just the right level of alcohol consumption to go for a walk and talk about life.

"So, what're you gonna do then?" Wheeljack asked after the conversation had trailed off.

"About what?"

"Starscream. Y'know, I don't think he's very good for you."

"I dunno," Bee shrugged. "And i know. I know nobody thinks he's a good person but he tries, Wheeljack. He really does! He just, he's scared. All the time, I think, of everything. He doesn't trust me, or you, or anyone at all, and I hate it. I hate that he feels like he can't trust me, even after all the stuff we've been through. It makes me mad! Not even mad at him, just mad at- at- I dunno, at the universe, at the war, at Megatron, at every shitty thing that ever happened that made him feel like he needs to be afraid all the time. I want him to be safe. I want to make him feel safe. But I dunno how and he won't tell me, and how can I tell him my stuff if he won't tell me any of his, and if we never tell each other anything then it's not all that much of a relationship."

"I mean, what do you even want from someone like that? He's not got a lot to offer. I mean, he's kinda hot if you squint, I guess, but other than that?"

"I think 'kinda hot' is the understatement of the century, Wheeljack. But... I dunno, I just. Want something. I want him to be able to tell me he cares about me. I know he does. But I want him to say it. I want it to be real."

"Why? You're a good person, Bee, it's not like you don't have options."

"Because I'm happy when he's around. I feel more like myself. I feel like my life is better when he's in it. For better or for worse, he's got a perspective nobody else does, and he always comes up with things I'd never even think of. He's smart and observant and funny just as much as he's a wise-ass and a smug bastard. For every inch of him that's irritating there's another bit that's incredible. And a lot of that incredible feels like our little secret, like he only lets me see those parts of him, and I like that too. And, I dunno, I get to be angry and there's nothing wrong with it. He's never mad that I'm mad, he never tells me that getting pissed is a waste of time or energy, he just lets me be. He argues, but he doesn't try to stop me or make me be polite and friendly because he doesn't need or want me to coddle him. I like the idea of taking care of him because it's less actually taking care and more just. being there, and letting him do the rest. I share my input and he gives his, and eventually he comes to the answer on his own and I get to see him being better. He gets better because he wants to, not because I'm forcing him to."

"I guess I just don't get how Starscream becomes a better person without you dragging him into it."

"People are fundementally good, Wheeljack. Don't look at me like that! It's true! Everyone wants to be loved, and really we all want to do good so we feel worthy of being loved, but it's about opportunity. When your needs aren't met, it gets harder and harder to do good. When everyone around you treats you with cruelty, it gets harder. When everyone believes you're a monster, why even bother trying to prove them wrong? All it takes is one opportunity, one chance to do the right thing, one person to say I know you know what's right for someone to take a step in the right direction. I didn't do anything to him, I just. I tell him what I know, which is that he doesn't enjoy who he became any more than the rest of us, and I give him space to know that even when it's scary and even when he loses everything, I'm on his side. Even the worst of us can improve given the chance. I really do believe that. I mean, you were at Megatron's trial. He opened the matrix. If that guy, given the opportunity, decided to turn himself around, why can't Star?"

"Did you kiss him and then yell at him or yell at him and then kiss him?"

"What?"

"Earlier, when you said you guys fought. Was it all like 'oh im in love with you' and then you kissed and then you fought afterwards? or was it like 'oh we're fighting by the way I love you' and then you kissed?"

"Uh, neither. I told him I was in love with him and he told me I wasn't and that made me really really angry, and I'm not even sure why honestly. And then I kissed him, to uh, prove I meant it, I guess? Not my best idea."

"Maybe you're just tired of being told what to do."

"I think I just don't like other people telling me what I am. I know what I am. I'm Bumblebee!" He took a deep breath and started yelling. "I'M BUMBLEBEE! I'M ALIVE AND I'M IN LOVE! AND I KNOW WHO I AM!"

"HELL YEAH!" Wheeljack threw his arms up, just enjoying the act of making noise as they wandered back to Bee's apartment, and eventually the two of them devolved into pointless hollering and whooping, until someone somewhere through a little chunk of metal and bonked Bee right in the back of the head with a SHUT THE FUCK UP! and the two of them just started laughing, both trying to shoosh the other as they eventually made it into Bee's apartment and Wheeljack settled on the couch, barely sparing a muffled g'night buddy before passing out, leaving Bee alone to stare out the window and think about what he wanted.

///

Bee rolled out of bed the next morning to the sound of a knock at the door, rubbing at his eyes, wincing at the too-bright sunlight. He wandered past where Wheeljack was snoring on the couch, muttering a yeah, yeah, I'm coming, to the door as the knock came again, less sure of itself this time.

He wasn't really sure who he expected to be at the door. But it both was and wasn't a surprise to see Starscream standing there.

"Bumblebee." He said plainly.

"Uh, good morning," Bee responded. "What's, uh, what's up?" Ah, that felt like the lamest possible thing he could've said. Nice one, Bumblebee.

"I... I want to apologize."

"You... what?"

"I'm sorry," he muttered, hands clasped in front of him, not meeting Bee's eyes. "I. For everything. I'm sorry I'm impossible. I'm sorry I'm cruel. I'm sorry I'm petty. I'm sorry for my ego and my selfishness and for how I only drink the most expensive wines, even when you buy me the cheaper ones. I'm sorry because I know that none of this is going to go away and I'm going to have to keep apologizing over and over and it's going to get old. I'm sorry for doing every possible thing I can to drive you away and I'm sorry you're not stupid enough to fall for it because your life would be a hell of a lot easier if you would. This isn't easy. And I could stand here and apologize for hours and I still wouldn't hit everything, but, but. You're... I'm missing my train for you, okay?"

"Uh. You lost me on that last bit."

"Thundercracker's advice only comes through rom-coms, so, sorry for that too, I guess."

"It's okay. Uh. Thank you for apologizing. And I'm sorry, too. I'm sorry that I'm stubborn, I'm sorry for yelling, I'm sorry that I'm touchy and pushy and too much in all the ways you aren't. I'm sorry I always have to feel like I'm winning, I'm sorry about all my moral grandstanding, I'm sorry for all the ways I make you feel like a bad person. I'm sorry for the days that I don't have the patience, and I'm sorry for the days I have too much and it makes you mad, and I'm sorry I thought I could make you love me in the way I wanted just by pulling hard enough."

"It's okay. It's... It's okay."

"Are we... are we okay?"

"Yeah. I think so. For now. And if we aren't later, then I think we can figure it out." Starscream let his hands seperate, and Bee reached out to take them in his own, intertwining their fingers.

"Okay."

"Only if you want to. I know I'm not easy."

"Neither of us are easy. But that's okay. I meant what I said. I know what I'm getting into. If you think we can figure it out, I'd like to try, at least."

"I think I can do that. I can try."

"You wanna start by kissing me properly?" Starscream's face flushed bright pink.

"That sounds as good a place to start as any."

[writingsbychlo]

💭joel fluff? i dont have specificness. i luv ur writing amd i luv joel xx

lol this became angstier than i intended but it's cute in the end stick with me

joel is pretty sure he'll never get over aimee

even though they parted on good terms and he knows they worked their stuff out, and it makes sense

they wouldn't work right anyway

in fact, what he's more hung up on is that he's scared he'll never find anything like what it once was again

everyone tells him that was just young love, stupid and rushed and reckless

and one day he'll find someone who is so much more

that it'll be all consuming, a burning passionate, subtle but uncontrollable

he just has to wait

and he's been waiting, for four years now, since they got to the safe place in the mountains

he's even finding himself growing mad that minnow is getting her first boyfriend and crush and even she's gonna be in a relationship before him

so, of course, once again he's complaining about all of this in front of a little fire with you, his best friend

a little tipsy on some old bottled beers the two of you found a while on your travels and decided to treat yourselves to

"you know, I feel like I don't even remember it, but I'm haunted by it. I'm a cuddly person, okay? I like to be affectionate. I have a lot of love to give. But nobody to love."

"uh-huh."

now, joel has been complaining to you about this for a while.

and, he is a cuddly person. in fact, most time, it's you that he's cuddling with.

on more nights than just a handful, he had crept into your bed at night because he was cold or lonely or had a bad dream about his parents.

he liked to press kisses to your forehead and hold your hand sometimes he would even kiss your cheek.

and right now, your legs are slung across his lap, huddled under one blanket with his thumb drawing patterns just above your knee as he complains.

for a while, it hurt, because you thought it meant something more to him and you fell for him, but he always complains to you but never makes a move.

"you know?"

"sorry, what? I zoned out."

"focus. I'm having a romantic crisis."

"aren't you always?" you'd tease, and he would scoff.

he's complaining, again, about how much he misses the parts of kisses that aren't actually kisses. the hands in his hair, the brushes of lips, the bumps of noses.

he has a way of describing things that make your heart always feel like it might explode while also making your chest tight with pain.

and, it's been a while since you were drunk, so you're not on the top of your wit and sensibility.

and he's right there

so you just grab a handful of his shirt, and pull him in, and he goes real quiet, real quick, when your lips meet his.

and it's timid at first, your lips pressing nervously to his

his lips nervously pecking back

and the moments between with brushes of noses, and little pants for air

before his hands are holding your face firmly to pull you back in

this is much more confident

he's making your head spin, lips fervent and sure against your own

kisses that steal your breath away and make your heart race

and when you pull back, your chest is aching a little bit

"that was, like, woah."

"yeah, well, you were complaining. now you remember."

because now that you've pulled back, and you can see those pretty brown eyes staring at you, the fire flickering, a look on his face you've never seen before, it fucking hurts.

"no, i just mean, like, shit. i get it now. i get what they mean."

"who?"

"my bunker. they always said you know. when you kiss the person you love, real love, you just know when it happens because it's like no kiss you've ever had before, and-"

and it's a fucking painful cold strike that makes your wholes stomach churn so much your lips seal just so you know you won't throw up.

"you don't love me, joel. don't say that."

"and how the hell would you know, huh?" and he's teasing, because he doesn't know the pain, yet.

"because I've been in love with you for years, and you've been complaining to me about it for years, while never looking to me. you're just drunk, and wanting affection. you're just all hopped up on your first kiss for a while, you don't know shit."

and you don't even give him a chance to reply, before you're leaving, and walking away to the shared sleeping bag you have set up, hidden behind some rocks and in a bush.

he joins you a while later, the fire put out, his back to yours all night, and you're not sure whether it hurts more than if he'd tried to cuddle you, like usual.

and the morning is awkward. he actually managed to fall asleep, so by the time he's awake, you've stolen some eggs from a nest and managed to fry them up, and you've got the last of the bread you brought with you on the trip.

he joins you, after a while, sitting silently beside you on the log.

"should be less than a day's walk back from here. if we leave soon, we can make it within the daylight."

"kiss me again."

and it catches you so off-guard, not only that he'd confront it so bluntly but the demand he makes, and you drop the pan of eggs onto the grass as you'd been trying to serve it up.

you're staring at them, avoiding his gaze, until a finger under your chin tips your head back up.

"I'm not drunk, and I'm not hopped up on any other kisses. so when you kiss me again, and I once again feel like I've hit heaven just by being touched by you, then we'll both know that it's real."

"and when you're proven wrong?" you can feel the tears lining your eyes. "when you feel nothing, and our friendship is ruined?"

"I never wanted a friendship when I first met you." and now you look hurt, and he panics, and warm hands are holding your face again, so delicately.

"what?"

"when I first met you, I swear I thought you were an angel. standing under a pretty blossom tree, practising your archery, and I wanted to make a move so bad. but I panicked, and I had no game, and pretty soon, some other guy was kissing you. so, I became your friend. and that other guy didn't last long, because as much as I adore you, you're a lot to handle."

"you're not winning me over."

"you know it's true." and then he kisses the tip of your nose. "I wanted to try again, but you were heartbroken, and I got over it. we became friends, such good friends, and I let it go. I've had crushes before. I told myself we were friends. you're the most important person in the world to me. you're my first thought in the morning and my last thought at night and my every thought during the day."

"joel.."

"but you didn't want me first. you were with someone else, and that's okay. I did so good at convincing myself that I thought I moved one but when you kissed me, do you know how it felt?"

"I believe you said like 'heaven'." and you're smiling now, and he's still peppering your face with soft kisses, kissing away ant tears that might slip free, but never commenting on them.

"actually, it felt so normal. when you kissed me, I was shocked by just how un-shocking it was. how natural it felt. how right. how it didn't make me think 'my best friend kissed me' but just that you did. it felt like it was almost meant to be like that. like the final part of a puzzle fitting into place. so, I get it. I get what they mean now. when I say I love you, I mean it. so, kiss me again, and prove me right."

"you're just being cocky, now."

"yeah, well, you love me for that, too."

[vyladromeave]

SHABOWKNIGHT HEADCANONS PLASTERBOATS

This is how Shabowknights work in my brain. It just is. 

(Warning this is super long. like really long. its literally like 69k+ words im not kid. ding. i did include a couple poupble to help break up the bup the text. so. good lick.)

BECOMING A SHADOWKNIGHT

There is only one requirement for a person to become a shadowknight: you gotta feel it. you gotta reel it. you gotta feel it in the heart of the cards. sometimes ur having a rough day and youknow what thats fine. the shadowlord is totally there for you. hes your homie. your bro. your bromie. he can be anything you want him to be. but most importantly he is here for YOU. hes the cool boss. he lets you slack off on fridays, he puts slightly outdated memes in his powerpoint presentations. all for you. you’re welcome.

Now I hear what you’re thinking. What happens when the Shadowlord has a bad day? He can’t always be there for you, right? Wrong. The Shadowlord is on that grind, as the kids say. The grind never stops. no breaks. Stops? no stops. the only thing the Shadowlord is putting a stop to is ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴛɪʀᴇ ʀᴜ'ᴀᴜɴ ʀᴇɢɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴠɪʟʟᴀɢᴇ-ʟᴏʀᴅ sʏsᴛᴇᴍ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɢᴏᴠᴇʀɴs ɪᴛ. Hes up all night and all day, working hard for you. give him a big thank you.

Not convinced? here’s a cool diagram he made for you. this could be us. you could be partially dead BUT holding hands with your best bro the Shadowlord. and really, what’s better than that? ghat? yeah? no. nothing. nothing is better. look at this diagram and fucking weep.

•

SHADOWKNIGHTS AND IMMORTALITY

All Shadowknights are immortal, as in immune to giving a shit. they just dont give a shit. they can just sit around for hours not giving a shit. do you give a shit? you shouldnt. you shoulding. houlding. hold mushrrom. thats what you should be doing right now. what are you waiting for? well???????????

If you were a Shadowknight, you could be holding a mushroom right now. That’s right. a whole mushroom just for you. but you arent. so you wont. why not? what’s stopping you? pledging your undying allegiance to the Shadowlord isnt so bad, we promise. it rocks, actually. we have pizza parties at the end of every month. does your employer hold pizza parties at the end of every month? I didn’t fucking think so.

Now I know what you’re thinking. But I dont waaaannnaaa kill the person I love the most! Well guess what? Sometimes you have to make hard decisions in life. Which is why you’re lucky that this decision is actually an easy one! I mean think about it, end of the month pizza party, mortal emotional attatchments. attachemnts. atatchments. fuck. however you spell it. Which one sounds cool as hell? Thats right. I don’t even have to say it. you know the answer. you already know the answer. i put it in your breain and it stays there.

•

Your favorite pizza topping.

What do you want on your pizza? I know you’re technically not one of the bros yet, but theres no way you wont be after all this, so I figured I’d go ahead and get your order down. Yeah i know the pizza party is a month away. im not ordering it right now. im ordering it later. that way its still fresh when it shows up. 

Although the delivery times out here in the nether kinda stink if I’m being honest. dont tell the shadowlord I said that though. he puts in a lot of time and effort to making sure everything is cool down here and like, really he doesn’t need to worry about the whole pizza delivery thing. like he already puts in so much time, the least i can do is cover the pizza thing yknow? 

I actually made the pizzas one month. have you ever made hundreds of personal pan custom pepperoni pizzas. its a lot of work. seriously. I kept burning them. so many burnt personal pan piping hot pipper pepper pepperoni personal pan personal pizzas. luckily im immune to fire, and i can never die. if you were one of the bros, you could be too. here’s your pizza.

•

Consuming the Pizza

Go on. eat it. I made it for you. what do you mean when did I have time to make a pizza? just now, while we were talking. didn’t you notice? maybe not. I’m good at making pizzas quickly now. ive had a lot of practice. maybe we could make some personal pan pinni mini pan pepperoni pizzas togethethter sometime.

oh my god. wait. im an idiot. im a fool. i was so focused on making you your personal pan pipini piziza pepperoni peper piza that i didnt even hear what you wanted for your toppings. im so sorry. oh my gosh im so sorry. i really didn’t mean to, i just got caught up in the moment. really. i promise. i know this reflects really badly on the whole shadowknight thing, but i promise this is a rare occasion. really. all the bros here in the nether are really kind and thoughtful, so stuff like this rarely ever happens. I really hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.

maybe its better that we dont have personal pipizini personal pan papaza pizzas. im not actually that good at making the pizazis. i lied. im sorry. im so sorry. this doesnt normally happen. i just wanted to sound cool. its been so long since someone’s considered joining the bros, i just wanted you to really like me. im so sorry. oh my god. im so sorry.

•

A Reformed Pizza

The pizza is metaphorical. we’re still friends, right? we’re still bros? future potential bros? the potential kinetic mechanical energy of bros? thats a little science joke for you, whwhwhere i just said the science words. I havent learned about science in a while, ive been stuck down here making personal pan pizzazos for a while. im sorry about the pizza thing again, by the way. i tossed  your bad personal pan pizza in the lava pool over there to make up for how sucks it was. it was really bad. yeah. its probably a good thing that nobody ate it.

A Sturdier Pizza

The pizza is literal. We can make a new pizza. together. with my powers and yours combined. give me your hand. we are holding hands now. these are the hands that will make a new pizza. together. we can do it if we believe. do you believe? in our new world? in our now pizza? you should. you should believe. you better fucking believe it.

look at thsi shit. ohhhhooooooollyf uck. look at that pizza. holy shit. look at that piza. holy shit. balls.

•

Natural Abiblibties

sorry im still jsut thinkginbg aboutt he pizza. homygod. holy shit. did youz seetheat pizza. did you see it. arey you looking. at the pizza. ohmygodc. look at thits. is. its. the pizza. its fucking perfect look at it. ive never made a pizza like that before. we diddit tofgotehr. we did it. the pizza. we did it.

iknow itsnoth the end of the month yet but iwant to have a pizza party. lets do it again. we’re strong enough. we can take on anything tofeger. antyhign. even pizza. especially pizaz. we can. iknow you dont believe it but its strue. lets do it again. lets make a pizza one more time. what dtopping do you want to put on it this time? mushrrom? we can do mushrrom.

here. im handing you a mushrrom. you can put it on the pizza. its a topping. there are many toppings you can put on pizza. you can put on extra cheese too. then iets ecxtra cheesy. cheesy peezy. pizza.

lets do it together.

•

Additional Pizzas

we’ve made so many pizzas. thatslike two whole pizzas. wholy fuck. holy shit. thats twho whole pizzas. bro. thats great! thats amazing! thats two more pizzas than we had before. like seriously we set our mind to the piizza and our brain to the pizza and you smush it and you sus it and then you pizza. woaw! pizza. pizza.

what if we made more pizzas.we could make a pizza for everyone. everyone could knpow of our pizzas. everyone could be just as happy as us. isnt that great? isnt that amazing? we could all pizzas. we could ALL pizzas.

hold on. im calling the bros. they need to know. they need to pizza. ive got two bros right here ready for a pizza. do you think we can do it. thats double the pizza we’ve already made. it could be tough. i know this is a lot of pressure, and it really means a lot to me, but its ok if you want to back down now. pizza is a lot of work. its hard work. i know it is. you know it now too. but we can pizza. we can pizza together.

•

THANK YOU FOR PIZZA!

:) the bros really enjoyed the pizza. thanks for helping me make pizza very appreciate very cool. pizza. im handing you a pizza coupon right now i am folding it into your hand. what store does it go to? dont worry about that. its just a coupon for pizza, you dont have to worry about the specifics. they’ll know what to do with it.

they’ll know.

:)

[surlifen]

i dont waste energy hating closed species And You Can Too!

alright you asked for it

Claim 1: “Closed species limit creativity in the art community by locking off certain concepts.”

No, they don’t. If you believe that, then you also must believe that copyrighting in general-- or just generally the fact that making a design exactly like someone else’s is viewed as kind of wack-- are stifling creativity. Why? It’s easy to accidentally make a concept that is similar to someone else’s, because there are literally just not that many Things That Exist. There will ALWAYS be repeats. Generally, if a design coincidentally looks like another, there will be a mixture of backlash from people who believe it was an intentional ripoff, and total acceptance from people who understand that it was an accident. Ultimately, the correct way to live is to understand that 1) these coincidences can happen and should not be punished, but 2) intentionally ripping off someone else’s work is wrong. It isn’t black and white, you must process 2 or more concepts at once.

Species owners understand this. I have never seen a species owner come after someone for accidentally making something similar or inspired. This is a myth. Species owners are busy as fuck, generally Normal People, and simply do not have the time or energy or desire to moderate things outside their community. Please talk to literally any of them for more than two minutes and you will discover this. Every species owner I have met is friendly and kind and I’ll go into detail on exactly how bullshit this stereotype of them chasing people down for similarities is later.

So, given that some randos will get upset and harass people over harmless inspiration/coincidence but most will not in ALL cases of accidental over-similarity: this is NOT a species-specific problem and happens just as often--if not MORE often, because of how much people fucking despise closed species-- with non-closed-species characters.

Secondly, species owners do not create a closed species with the goal of closing off a concept from use. They do it to create a community they can manage and share a concept they have created. 

Take the world of Nephfei, created by the artist Queijac. The closed species of Nephfei are called Spinxyn, and they are very much sphinxes. They are not a brand-new concept Jac is claiming to have come up with, they are intentional and very direct references to sphinxes. What sets them apart is their species LORE, WORLD, and COMMUNITY.

[image ID: a screenshot of the Spinxyn species guide on deviantart, created by queijac. Text reads “IMPORTANT NOTE: Spinxyn are a species OF sphinx. Yes, they are sphinx, and yes of course anyone can make sphinx characters and designs using similar appearances! I claim no ownership over design aspects! Spinxyn as a CS community, however, which offers social art related activities, world building, themed events, etc., to use the characters in, simply relates to my own PERSONAL WORK and how i want to enrich peoples experiences with it! Please understand this, thank you!!!”]

This species is not closed so that Jac can copyright the idea of a sphinx. It is closed so that Jac has some control over the world and lore they have created. Were anyone able to create a Spinxyn without an approval process, not only would the community become too large to manage too quickly, but all sorts of Spinxyn with aspects that don’t fit the lore would pop up. 

[Image ID: screenshot of a message from Queijac in the nephfei official public Discord server. Text reads: “theres just a total disconnect that 99% of ppl making closed species are making. a Group...... its about.... the community....... and building the community around One concept that someone makes and puts rules in place for so that they can actually. U kno. MANAGE THINGS... and make a cohesive group experience....... the reason CS have so much popularity is because they come with a community, not because theyre 100% unique never before seen or heard of concepts”]

Jac explicitly acknowledges that sphinxes do not belong to them and even says that borrowing some spinxyn-specific appearance details is okay!!! The ONLY thing off-limits here is a WORLD, COMMUNITY, and LORE.

Except it isn’t. Because Nephfei also hosts not one, not two, but THREE open species of intelligent beings, plus NINE official species of non-intelligent animals, so that anyone can participate.

Claim 2: Species owners harass and police people who make similar concepts.

I touched on this already re:species owners are busy as fuck & Jac openly encouraging people to make sphinx characters and even borrow spinxyn-specific traits, but this note from ground-lion/seel, the creator of Chimereons, really does it for me.

[Image ID: a DeviantArt note from ground-lion to me. Text reads “hello, thank you for showing me this! we don't actively do anything to police offbrands, since it causes more trouble than i think it's worth. i like to avoid drama wherever possible, and it seems like most people who participate in offbrands are just looking to press people's buttons so we can't/won't do anything to these people, i think it is best to just try and ignore it and move on.”]

Here you have the owner of one of the arguably most shit on and hated species saying outright “we don’t bother doing anything about intentional ripoffs”. For context, this WAS 100% intentional, I had noted ground-lion about a user I saw posting adoptables that were LABELED “offbrand chimereons” (so if anyone was hArAsSiNg PeOpLe oVeR SiMiLaR cOnCePtS here, it was me, calling attention to intentional and stated copying). 

Sidenote: I think it’s shitty to intentionally steal a concept. Ground-lion has also said there is no issue with making anthropomorphic chameleon characters, just that chimereons were inspired by a set of traits, a word, lore, a desire to create a community, and their own personal stylization of anthro chameleons. It’s fine to take inspiration from how someone else stylizes an animal, but the degree to which people do it-- just outright copying every aspect of Seel’s work-- rubs me the wrong way. Not enough to say anything because that is only my personal opinion and because I do not have time for that shit.

The Dainty mod team + owner (Pajuxi-Adopts) also have a section stating that to make a design no longer a Dainty, all that’s needed are the following changes: 

[image ID: screenshot of Dainty species ToS. Text reads “ Visual edits must be made for discontinuation, here is our standard discontinuation options: - remove the stockings completely and give them fur like an actual satyr - keep the stockings and give them human legs - make them an anthro - keep the stockings but they MUST start at least a quarter to halfway up the bottom portion of the deer leg with a clear divide between the stocking and leg with fur poking out underneath - you are free to suggest your own edits as well! “]

This may be speaking specifically about discontinuing a former Dainty due to the context we found it in, but this means that a design is not considered a dainty if, for example, its stockings show fur underneath and are not part of the body. That’s it. That’s all they ask. Pajuxi is not saying “this is my closed species of SATYRS WITH SOCKS and if you DARE make a satyr with socks i will COME FOR YOU!!!”, they clearly state that satyrs with socks are an acceptable Not A Dainty. I personally think the lore behind the stockings being physically part of the body and all the specific rules they entail is interesting and original and I do not think it’s such a wild ask to say “hey, please respect this and if you see it, don’t rip it off on purpose. You can take inspiration in all these valid ways but I want to have some control over the concept I came up with”.

Claim 3: Species owners are rich elitists making small artists suffer.

Species owners are small, independent artists. Artists being hated the instant they get even moderate success (that’s still usually BARELY A LIVING WAGE) is its own huge discussion and internalized issues + capitalist brainwashing you all have to deal with on your own damn time, but I want to emphasize that someone making a living or even comfortable wage from their art is Good, Actually, and is something we should all be happy to see and want to see more of. 

Furthermore, no one is being taken advantage of. CS characters are a luxury item. You do not NEED one. If you absolutely will die without a sock deer, make one where the sock isn’t part of their body. If you will die without a chimereon, make an anthro chameleon and use your own ideas. If you will die without a sphinx character, I’m overjoyed to inform you that fucking nobody ever asked you not to make one. CS involvement is voluntary. If you don’t like them, don’t participate in them, but keep in mind that someone saying “hey, please don’t blatantly copy this design concept I spent time creating” is The Same Thing as someone asking you not to copy their individual character designs. You could live without stealing character designs. You can live without making something exactly like an existing CS. 

Claim 4: CS put concepts behind a paywall and make them inaccessible.

Again, these are a luxury item. Most closed species MYO slots cost $10-$45. That is not a ridiculous amount to aspire to. Closed species owners WANT people to participate in their species, so there are a ton of ways.

- Chimereons hold First-Time Owner flatsale slot raffles every single month to ensure people who are new to the community have a greater chance of nabbing a slot than existing participants - Dainties have an art prompt every month, which rewards every participant regardless of skill level one prompt point (the art can be visual or written). Six prompt points can be used to buy an MYO slot for free. If you desperately need a dainty and are flat broke, you can get a free one by writing 150 words a month for six months or doing one drawing each month. Skill level doesn’t matter, ALL participants get a point if they follow the rules. - I joined a raffle for a free pre-made Spinxyn. I did not win the raffle. Jac randomly decided to give out 7 MYO slots too, one of which I won. I entered a raffle that DID NOT HAVE MYO SLOTS AS A PRIZE and got one for free anyway. CS owners want people to participate, I promise. - Dainties just had a 24-hour turn-in event (that they warned about a month in advance so folks could prepare designs), meaning every single person who submits a design in that 24hr time frame gets a slot. Normally slot sales are limited in number and sell out in seconds. - Jac sporadically draws quicker, messier Spinxyn designs which always cost $5 and raffle-flatsales them on Discord. $5 is not a gatekeepy price. - Tomoyokis recently had a free-for-all event where everyone could claim either a free common slot or a $10 uncommon slot. These are just specific examples I remember of easier or free ways to get CS. Non-specifically:

- art = reward systems are common, so again, just writing or drawing enough can equal a free MYO slot or entry into a raffle for a pre-made design - many many species that are relatively new have FREE turn-in events or giveaways to build a community - free FTO slot raffles - paid but discounted FTO slot raffles - random free design giveaways - trading art for a CS character or MYO slot (I’ve gotten a dainty and two dainty MYO slots this way, and I realize not everyone’s art gets accepted, which is why this is a whole list of ways that don’t require artistic skill whatsoever)

So getting your hands on one isn’t the worst thing in the world. You might need a little luck (as in, you have a completely fair chance that is equal to everyone else’s) or a little dedication (6 months of wanting one, or having to have a design ready within a limited time for a free turn-in event).

Also, there’s a reason CS prices cannot change much: this causes issues with the value of all existing CS characters. Dainties will ALWAYS be $35. The MYO slot price will NEVER increase. If it did, all previous dainties would be worth less, or would have to have their worth increased, which is logistics hell. Inflation doesn’t affect CS the same way it does everything else.

Claim 5: ok but legally nothing is stopping me from making one lmaoo

That is true. It’s also true that there’s not really any effective laws in place to protect artists when they say “Hey, please don’t quote retweet my art on Twitter” or “Hey, please don’t repost my art even with credit”. Sometimes, we just respect artists and do what they ask because we are Nice Fucking People, but apparently, species owners are a whole different thing, evil, and do not deserve the same basic respect.

IN CONCLUSION

Talk to a CS owner. They’re reasonable and kind people. There’s an exception to every rule, of course, but what I’ve found overwhelmingly is that they’re literally just people like you and I who were excited to make something cool and share it with people. The emphasis is HUGELY on community. I used to dislike the idea of CS too, but since participating in them and talking a ton with the owners (who are super down-to-earth and active in their servers-- Jac helped me with a confusing horse video game and gave me a Free Horse in there), I’ve realized that the caricature of CS owners as greedy and bitchy, laying claim to basic concepts like A Cat With Wings, is just bullshit. The stereotype that CS community members are an angry mob who will roast you over a fire if you draw a chameleon on two legs is bullshit. The idea that CS are impossible to get, are for the bourgeoisie, and cost thousands of dollars is bullshit (I bet you’re thinking about scarfoxes right now. Hot take: I think it’s great that an artist is selling their intellectual property for that much. I think we all should be able to. I think if someone chooses to spend that much on a design they think would make them happy, that is literally not a fucking problem, and since it was their choice and their money no one is being taken advantage of unfairly. Let people buy the shit they want to buy, I promise you will fucking survive).

I like CS, I think they are neat, I wish people would give the owners a break. They are just independent artists like me. They get lied about and stereotyped over this stupid drama bullshit and they’re so tired and saddened when the subject comes up. They literally do not police anyone-- they don’t have the time or the desire, and it wouldn’t work anyway.

I won’t post CS content here anymore. But I like participating voluntarily in these communities. I don’t understand why that’s something YOU get to have a problem with.

Stay out of my inbox. Thanks.

[ssadumba55]

Family Isn’t Blood (Fatherly! Jack Sparrow X Reader)

Request: Hello i have an requests for pirates of Caribbean. Can you do one when reader is lik 16 and have no parents and a crew in Jack sparrow ship and he is like a father fiquer to her and she isl like a daughter to him but she is always mean toward him and once jack got in troble and she tried very hard to save him and succes and he is like teasing her about it. Sorry if its to long and its ok if you dont like it

 A/N: Probably super out of character, but I kind of like how it turned out so.

Growing up had been rough. You’d never had a place to call your own, as far as you could remember. Your parents had died when you were young, leaving you to fend for yourself and you had been on your own ever since. There was no sympathy in the world for a poor orphan child like you. Every day was spent trying to earn your keep, never staying too long in one place.

Then you bumped into Jack Sparrow.

It had been a complete accident. You were working on some of the ships in the dock, struggling to carry something probably, when his ship pulled into the dock. Ships were always pulling into the dock, you didn’t even look up from your work until, of course, he was right beside you trying to get you to tell him where things were in your little village.

“Please, can’t you see I’m trying to work?” You asked, slightly annoyed as you tied what felt like your hundredth knot that day. He looked around, then back at you.

“You’re a little young to be working in any capacity,” he pointed out. He wasn’t wrong but you were tired and stressed after a lot of work that day.

You picked up a box from beside one of the ships. “I’m thirteen, work is all I have, sir. Now can you please leave and get drunk somewhere else? I’m working here.”

Something about you intrigued the pirate that day, though you had never figured out what exactly it was. Some of the crew speculated it was probably the fact you reminded him a lot of himself, out fending for yourself. The world was a dangerous place on your own, nobody knew that better than Captain Jack Sparrow. He offered you a place on his ship, work that you could do with ease and a place you could basically call your home.

Maybe it wasn’t a traditional home that stayed in one place, but you didn’t mind. You could see the world and never even have to leave the deck.

Of course, you would never admit that to him. Sure, he had shown you a great kindness by letting you stay on his ship, but you didn’t need his help. If he hadn’t come along, you would’ve been just fine on your own. Plus, he was a drunk and he was always getting into trouble. You’d never spoken so much as a kind word to him since you’d stepped foot on the deck of the Black Pearl. There was no need. He knew you were thankful, and you knew you didn’t need to say it.

But now you were at a crossroads. It had been three years since Jack had taken you under his wing, even though you wouldn’t exactly call it that. You were pacing the deck of the ship, every now and then looking up to shore and scowling slightly. He had promised he wouldn’t be long, but he hadn’t been back for hours.

There were few redeeming qualities about Jack Sparrow, but he was usually a man of his word, no matter how bizarre that word was. He wasn’t off somewhere getting drunk and losing track of time, there was definitely something wrong. But the crew didn’t seem to think so, which left you in an odd predicament.

You could go to shore and drag him back yourself or wait and potentially risk getting caught yourselves by whatever had your captain.

“Captains orders, he told us all to stay put.” Gibbs watched you as you walked around the ship, grabbing things you might need and got ready to head to shore.

“Yeah, well he’s not here, is he? You stay here, just in case he does come back, but I’m going up there to grab him myself.”

You didn’t say what was unspoken. Jack Sparrow was the closest thing to a father figure you’d ever had, even though he was far from being the best one. He’d taught you mostly everything you knew about being on the seas. This wasn’t just a rescue mission so you could get back to moving, this was a rescue mission to save what little family you had left. You couldn’t be on your own anymore, no matter how much you hated to admit that.

There was definitely something off as you slowly slunk your way through the little town you’d stopped by. Everything was quiet, which was typical for this hour, but it still felt eerie. You spent a lot of time wandering, not knowing where you were going. Where had that stupid pirate gotten himself stuck now? You pushed a door open to escape some guards walking your way and turned, realizing you’d entered some sort of jail. There were cells and they were all full. They didn’t even look up as you walked by, eying them uneasily and gripping onto your rucksacks strap tighter.

“… There has to be another way out of here.” You mumbled, but there was nothing as far as you could see besides cells. There were so many cells, though the number of people inside each was quickly diminishing. You wondered briefly if this was where you’d end up if found here.

“(Y/n)!” A familiar voice called, and you whipped around, studying the cells closely. There was nobody there. You turned around to keep going when you heard it again. “Oh, come on, (Y/n).”

“Who said that?” You pulled out a dagger from your sheath, it was the only weapon you’d been able to find on such notice on the decks of the Pearl. You held it out in front of you, walking slowly back the way you came. As you walked, slowly and cautiously, a hand darted out to grab your wrist.

“Not sure what yer hoping to do with that,” the voice chuckled, amused and you let out a yelp, dropping the dagger. You looked up, glaring at Jack Sparrow as he leaned casually against the bars of his cell, flashing you a winning smile.

You let out an annoyed noise, bending down to pick your dagger up. “That’s not funny, Sparrow,” you snapped, tucking the dagger away.

“Not even a little?” He asked, grinning. You tried not to let your anger get the better of you. You were here to rescue him not kill him, though that was getting harder by the second.

Immediately, you bent down to get a good look at the lock that was holding him in his cell, ignoring any comments he made about enjoying his time in the cell. There had been a time where you had needed to know locks and how to pick them, it was the only you could get food. Though you were out of practice, you could still remember what you needed to do.

Reaching into your pocket for something to pick the lock, you found what you needed and set to work. He was quiet now; you could feel his eyes watching you as you worked on the lock. Even with his stare, you didn’t falter. You couldn’t falter. This was depending on you and you were going to give it your all.

The lock let out a click and you grabbed it, throwing it to the side. Pulling on the bars, they came open with ease and you tucked away your lockpick for future use, grateful that you’d still remembered how to use it. You gestured with your arms grandiosely, letting him know he could walk forward and join you.

He did, swaying slightly and you knew he was drunk. You didn’t say anything, but you grabbed him by the arm and pulled him the way you’d come, three years on the sea had made you slightly stronger than you’d been before. There was no place for weak, scrawny people on the Black Pearl.

“Ye came back for me,” he smirked, looking at you slyly from the corner of his eye. You scoffed and shook your head.

“The crew was worried. I was tired of hearing them whine so I’m doing something about it.”

“That’s not the only reason ye’re here, admit it.”

You could smell the alcohol on his breath and wrinkled your nose, but he was right. You paused. He stood there swaying and you stared ahead, at the door that would lead you back out into the little town. You felt tears threatening to fall, since when had you been about to cry?

You were only a kid, you reminded yourself, a kid forced to grow up way too soon.

“Fine, alright. I care, is that what you want to hear?” You asked, wiping your eyes before the tears fall, not wanting them to leave tear tracks. “You and the crew are the closest things I have to a family and I can’t lose another family. So just. Get your shit together.”

You grabbed his arm again and kept dragging him. No more words were exchanged the rest of the way back to the ship. He set sail immediately and you sat on the edge, looking down into the water. Somedays, when you weren’t feeling great, you’d contemplate jumping in and joining your parents. You don’t know why you never did.

“They’d be proud of you.” It was as if he could read your thoughts, he leaned against the ship’s edge beside you. You laughed bitterly.

“How would you know?”

There was a moment of silence, which made you inwardly snort. Of course, he was just saying that to make you feel better. He didn’t actually believe it.

“Because I know you and if they’re anything like ye, then they would be proud of who ye’d become. Also, because I’m proud of ye. Ye didn’t have to come back and save me, ya know?” He took a swig from the bottle of what you could only assume was rum. You felt your face heat up.

He wasn’t your parents and he could never replace them, what you’d lost was the chance of a normal life. The chance to grow up with love and support, to actually experience the joy of being a child. But, as he stepped away from the side of the ship, heading back to the steering wheel that Gibbs was managing in his stead, you had to admit to yourself; there were far worse ways to spend the rest of your days than by Jack Sparrow’s side.