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#i dont remember my tag system help girl
starshifter · 4 months
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All the additional notes I wrote for myself for 'my hopes the wind done scattered' that are too amusing/potentially interesting for me to just throw them away. Think of it as bonus material. Very messily formatted bonus material
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Honestly, the idea for this came from a list of prompts for malevolent mermay 2023. Sadly, I had not yet heard of this fandom at that time so im paticipating late ok …and without any mers. I do not control the way prompts get interpreted. I just write. Sometimes. (the prompt in question was leviathan)
Yes I’m aware canon KIY is probs around 11 ft but I’m making him better ok. It’s what he deserves
Look, Cthulhu is like a mile tall and he’s (probably) Hastur’s half brother so why is Hastur so fucking tiny in comparison? No. No, I am fixing this
My first idea for a possible title was Arthur Dreamhouse so that’s a thing
He has his full powers back if he’s fully integrated. Have him fetch Arthur via a dream. Pull him out of a dream about the Pits while sleeping in that little cabin. He can heal Arthur’s legs in the process since this is an Arthur doesn’t flip that coin AU so Kayne hasn’t healed him. (How long has he been in that cabin then? And how bad off is he health wise? You got a lot to fucking fix here Hastur)
This is honestly just Rascal Arthur: the fic. He just doesn't like being told what to do. Haha (i swear kayne brain is contagious)
King tore john out because reintegrating them was changing him and he was scared of what he was becoming, in canon this results in dark world 2: electric boogaloo, in this au he decides being broken is worse
For emotional whiplash, please imagine King walking around like this: https://www.tumblr.com/without-ado/724427056746807296/cutie-pie-of-the-sea-x (if you actually want to know how I was imagining him moving tho, look up videos of feather stars swimming, it’s the closest thing I can compare it to, except he’s not feather star shaped but rather a creature of cloth and shadows and tentacles sort of, depends how much body he’s manifesting on a given plane of reality at any given time)
Schrodinger’s body: It’s there and it isn’t there but you can’t tell which because there’s a yellow cloak in the way
Hint: they are not fingers. The king does not have hands
Me, who has never touched vicuna wool in my life: what if I gave the king some sort of dreamlands vicuna wool equivalent for his cloak? Cue me staring at images of clothes I cant even afford to touch and trying to decide what they would feel like: hmm, it’s probably soft but silken doesnt seem right at all, better not use that word
Arthur gets re-traumatized and then gratuitously pampered: the fic
The King casually failing to mention that the mosaic in the center depicts him. Arthur wasn’t ready for that knowledge yet 😔
The dancers (at least in this fic, i have so many different ideas i want to explore for the dancers) are a bit like living puppets. They were made from the King’s power and they took on some degree of life due to it, but they’re still an extension of his will. So the laughing…. Was just the King laughing cause Arthur is ridiculous and adorable. Also up for debate if they actually looked away or just moved back a bit. What are boundaries to a god?
The dancers are made of a material that can best be described as elastic ceramic. Yes I don't know what that means either but I know in my heart it is true. I also imagine them walking in permanent pointe, because that's how their ankles work. They also have knife fingers. But they were being nice to Arthur so he didn't really notice
My friend pointed out that Arthur could have been using fancy wine as soap and my fucking god y’all I missed a golden opportunity there
It’s not a guest room, Arthur. Arthur, it’s a harem room for artists. Arthur.
The fabric wrapped around Arthur's arm is actually a part of the King's body. His mantle is part of him and the tattered ends of it work like fabric tentacles
And then arthur continues to fail to reconcile john being the king in yellow because wow that boy is stubborn and really needs to believe john is different in order to function. He’ll get there eventually
Athur’s so desperate not to be alone that he’d do anything, accept almost anything, as long as he can keep his loved ones close and alive. Absolutely delicious
I had to actively fight with myself not to put a “big, am I?” joke there at the end. I hope you appreciate my sacrifice
Hastur never actually gave Arthur his name. Dumbass
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treesbian · 4 months
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being mad at my parents for events long passed hours
#man my mom used to have my sisters help her pin me down so she could pop all the pimples on my face. bruh that fucking hurt. also.#worst thing you can do for those... i was having age-typical acne and i guess she just didn't like to look at it?? idk.#the acne itself didn't hurt but there was a lot of it so just like. you know how it does indeed hurt to pop those. well there were a lot#and she didn't stop even when i was crying and screaming bc she wasn't done??#and she did it to my back too and some of those grew on nerves and hurt even fucking more#and no she was not using properly sterilized equipment or even fresh washed hands thanks for asking <3 she acted entirely on impulse lol#i mean. i guess she knows its wrong **now** bc she hasn't tried anything similar with my baby sister....???#and shes starting to get acne like i used to have.#idk is that dramatic to be upset about. just imagine being pinched and pricked nonstop for like 2 hours. maybe it wasn't 2 hours.#but also physically restrained too like straight up sat on. is that fucked up.... thats not normal right???#and uh. a few years ago they held me still to shave my armpits with my dad's clippers bc mom is completely convinced#it isn’t possible to be hygenic as a 'woman' with pit hair or anything bc of Pheromones!!! and when i say goddamn fine#i'll just use men's hygiene stuff then she says that won't work bc Pheromones!!!!#like having a slightly different endocrine system makes ppl a different species or something#anyway. i cried just a little bit when they did that <3 gave me razor burn#and after my dad asked like 'is growing that hair out like. important to your identity or something' and.#well i dont know but that fucking hurt and you violated the choice that *eye* was making with *my* body#man i know mom still thinks she never physically abused me bc she didn't ever like. beat me up or anything but. thats abuse right??#she still thinks i was calling her abusive out of fucking nowhere.#sometimes she asks 'when was i ever abusive' and i give her an example and she goes 'well that was JUST BECAUSE--' and like. girl.#you think just bc you can justify it to yourself it wasn't abuse? every abuser can justify it to themselves....#talk tag#man i keep forgetting about how she used to physically restrain me to do her not-dermatologist approved extractions.#i guess it mostly didn't hurt that bad but like. the forcefullness and duration of it. lmao#anyway i found her a late mothers day gift today. its a hairstick with a dragonfly charm#abuse tw#sorry if that triggered anyone b4 i remembered to tag it
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rab1darachn1d · 5 months
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INTRO💥💥💥
Name: Ozzie/Sunday + anyname from my url
Pronouns: he/they pref but idrc
Agender, bi, aroace spectrum
TVhead robotkin and spiderkin💥💥💥
Special interests are spiders(specifically tarantulas) and psychology
Dyslexic!!! Sorry for spelling mistakes/reading stuff wrong and please don't use super small or hard to read fonts when talking directly to me!!! Typing quirks are fine but if you can control them or add translations thats greatly appreciated
MINOR!!! idc if ur over 18 and interact or if we are mutuals but dont be weird please I will just block you
WE STAND WITH PALESTINE🇵🇸🍉
(@remindertoclick <- DO YOUR DAILY CLICKS OR I'LL THROW ROCKS AT YOU)
@mechcanicalmadness MY BESTESTFRIEND AND COOLEST DAD EVER ALSO GUY WHO MADE THE FIRST 2 ARTS BELOW 💥💥💥
@absolutelymadoka IS MY MAGICAL GIRL DAUGHTER !!!! THEY ARE THE SILLIEST AND NICEST EVER BE NICE TO THEM
I help with the @bungostraycreatures gimick blog acc go look at it its run by my bestest friend :3
@sundazeing is my icons/npt/moodboard blog!!! Requests are always open, read the rules and dni if u you have anything you want me to make B)
@queenofthecafe is my Lucy bsd rp blog >::)
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(user box made by @/absolutelymadoka)
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WARNINGS /BFYI / FOR MOOTS*****
-I type in caps a lot
-Im not very good a tw tagging things tho I try my best !!! If you get triggered by anything I post/rb lmk and I'll tag it
-I swear a lot !!! Like way too much !!! I do not give a damn abt slurs AS LONG AS YOU CAN CLAIM THEM !!! IF I FIND OUT YOU USE SLURS YOU CANNOT CLAIM I'LL CALL YOU A BIGOT AND BLOCK YOU
-Anything suggestive is a joke and do NOT make jokes like that to me if we are not friends I will call you a freak
-I like to give people nicknames/ shorten people's names(mainly if ppl have a long ass name/url and it fucks me up tryna type it) but if that bothers you lmk
-Not good with tone so I use tone tags, you aren't forced to use them but if you'd like it'd make communication easier
-I have a bad habit of randomly disappearing for a few days for whatever reason, so if I accidentally ignore you sorry, please don't take it personal
-If you are a shithead to my mutuals I will be a shithead towards you <3 also blocked <3
-DMS ARE OPEN !!! FEEL FREE TO TALKS/RANT/VENT ABT WHATEVER !!! however I'm not very good at socializing and if I seem rude, standoffish or awkward I'm so sorry💀💀💀
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SYSTEM THINGS*****
-i am the host and this is my acc though they post shit on here too
-their posts will be tagged with ***postinghours(sakepostinghours for an example)
-I love answering questions!!! However I am not a medical professional and I cannot diagnose you or speak for other systems!!!
-^ Don't ask abt triggers, alter roles or trauma I will ignore you or call you a dumbass nosey weirdo
-fictive heavy(dont be weird about them or theyll block you and idk probably call you a freak)
-^ don't bring up source trauma unless they make jokes about it first OR if they are friends with you
-^ First to treat any of them like a fictional character gets their limbs ripped off<33
-if ur another fictive theyd like to say hi but dont be weird and understand they might see you differently then how you remember them
-if you say "Can *** stop fronting/can you switch with ***" I will throw rocks at you and you will get blocked
-^ if u wanna talk to someone or have a message for someone we are happy to tell them
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DNI*****
-basic dni(homo+transphobe, racists)
-"radqueers" and "transids"
-Proshippers and zoophiles(YALL R FUCKING NASTY GO AWAY)
-"radfems" and "terfs" (fuck you go away)
-Pro Israel mfs
-Endos/Tulpas/Willows/Mixed Origin, we will not participate in any syscourse but yall make me uncomfy
-^supporters of those
-"*** personality disorders are absuive" go away die go shoo get OUT(ily people with personality disorders)
-people who are against others with "scary" disorders fuck off you aren't helpful
-pro ed/"thinspo" mfs... wth are yall doing
-NSFW ONLY blogs (nothing against yall but im a minor)
-people who are shitty towards therians, otherkins, xenogenders, etc
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FANDOMS + FAVORITE CHARACTERS*****
Bungo Stray Dogs(Dazai, Verlaine, Fyodor and Lucy) is my main fandom and hyperfixation BUT here are some other fandoms of mine I still like
☆ = I still actively look at/take part in
♡ = not as active but I will scream abt if given the opportunity
♤ = I like it but I'm not updated with the fandom
favorite characters r not in order
-Jujusitu Kaisen(Gojo , Megumi , Itadori and Sukuna)☆
-Deadplate(Vincent) ♡
-Genshin Impact(Baizhu, Xiao, Diluc, Childe and Dottore) ☆♡
-Honkai: StarRail(Boothill, Sunday, Clara, Sparkle, Natasha and Aventurine) ☆
-Hollow Knight(Grimm and Quirrel) ♡
-Pokemon(EMMET AND INGO💥💥💥)(Also Galvantula, Reshiram, Gallipede and Eternatus) ♡
-Madness Combat(Deimos and 2BDAMNED) ♤
-Guilty Gear(Robo-Ky, Zato, Chipp, Ky and Happy Chaos) ♤
-Wuthering Waves(Scar and Lingyang) ♤
-Cookie Run(Espresso Cookie, Red Velvet Cookie and Rougefort Cookie) ♡
-RWBY(Qrow, Phyrra, Blake and Emmerald) ♡
-Project Sekai(Rui and Shizuku)♤
-Castle Crashers(Blacksmith)♤
-No Straight Roads(Neon J)♤
-The Property of Hate(RGB)♡♤
-Stardew Valley(Sebastian, Sam and Hailey)♤
-Omori(Captain Space Boyfriend, Hero and Kel)♡♤
-Howl's Moving Castle(Howl, Calcifer and Markl)♡
-Ponyo(Fujimoto)♡♤
-Punishment Gray Raven(Wanshi)♤
-Danganrompa(Kokichi , Keebo , Gonta , Nagito , Miu and Celestia)♤
theres others but those r irrelevant we dont talk abt the dark ages
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insufferable-pri · 6 days
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have too many thoughts on the new madoka trailer to ramble in the tags of other people's posts so rambling under the cut instead (i am too excited to go back to sleep help)
Clara dolls theory real (to me). Which brings the question of how did they get powerful enough to turn into doppel homuras
Who are the new girls. Where did they come from. How did they get here. Actually assuming homura's uhh universe sized witch/demon barrier thing works more like a regular witch barrier did the law of cycles send more people to bring back madoka
That green girl is walpurgis isn't she (or at least one of the girls who became part of walpurgis). The trees in the background remind me of a post-walpurgisnacht scene (maybe i'll find a picture later)
The repaired tea cup. At the end of rebellion we hear a glass shattering and iirc this was basically signifying homura rejecting her friendship with mami. What if (probably reaching here) walpurgis is trying to reconnect with madoka after becoming friends in magical girl heaven idk or (reaching even more) this scene is misleading and she's actually talking to homura and trying to befriend her
what if even though the law of cycles is trying to bring back madoka, she's also still trying to save homura. Without madoka as guidance all she knows is eat hot chip and lie bring back madoka and whatever was the last thing she was instructed to do (yes this is basically the kagerou daze)
oh my god madoka heaven is basically kagerou daze without the snakes (and the suffering)
What if lawofcycles.exe broke after the split more than anyone originally thought. What if that statue isn't just a statue it's the now formless law of cycles because madoka has been away for too long and it's starting to lose itself
There was something else i wanted to say about lawofcycles.exe broke but i dont remember it anymore
Something something sayaka is there because she was madoka's secretary in the law of cycles (from the concept movie)
If i go back and forth between referring to the law of cycles as a person and as a dimension/space it's because i did not get enough sleep
Mentioned this in the tags of another post: kyoko eats a bunch of snacks in the anime, but only eats apples in rebellion (when most of her memories are wiped/altered). Her holding an ice cream thing probably signifies a return of her memories. Also the whole apples kinda says something about homura's perception of kyoko but idk how to articulate it (this is assuming there was an actual reason for kyoko only eating apples in rebellion)
I have been informed the other small child is bear girl from episode 12. I need to rewatch episode 12.
The narration "I will go with hope. Hope will go with you. The miracle that I achieved with you will surely guide us", followed by white feathers ascending with a single feather turning black as it descends. Not entirely sure what to make of all this, but i'm guessing the miracle refers to the law of cycles
Theory: madoka will choose to reunite with the law of cycles. Maybe she'll try to absorb homura and maybe homura rejects/is rejected by the law of cycles (again). The universe doesn't really know how to handle both of them coexisting as gods so it recreates itself for the third time. No idea what'll happen with the magical girl system in the new universe
Would anyone be happy with this? Who knows
idk where kyubey falls into this but his presence never bodes well
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asbestieos · 2 years
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OH YEA bc of ur tags on the baba yaga rb asking abt the scene i shall tell u who i think is who (obbligato spoilers, go read it itll ruin ur life)
ballerina - kaname obv that old guy - mayhaps an es higher up? or ibara but i think the other would fit better that guy with the old guy - if the old guy is a higher up hed most likely be ibara. otherwise no idea. he isnt that integral to the story so he could just be some rando WAIT maybe he could be tatsu… mask dude rip - JUN. JUN. JUN. THEMATICALLY IT FITS TO ME. ONCE KANAME BECOMES A SPECIAL STUDENT HES LIKE 'lol bye girl who r u' AT JUN N JUN IS LIKE 'wtf traitor'. KANAME CUTS OFF JUN!! HE KILLS OFF HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH JUN!!!! I LOVE METAPHORS. or alternatively: hes tatsumi and the scene maybe represents how kaname pairing with tatsumi corrupts them both…?? thats a stretch… idk how to say it help but i have an idea for what it represents im just bad at words the 'ice' cream - its a character now yea but uh… it represents kanames want and need for fame and attention plus love, and how its addictive and clouds his better judgement leading to him doing anything to get it. so its symbolism kinda stays the same basically?? kaname is just a greedy boy
WAIT ALSO (im writing this in one go without rly editing im gaining ideas as i write i cannot shut up now) maybe the old guy near the beginning could be ibara? then halfway through an es higher up replaces him bc ibara didnt expect nor want what happened, so he wouldnt further endorse it. (ibara is in his place until the bridge/chicken coop bit then it changes for the rest) by es higher up i mean like, gatekeeper or something maybe. tbh i dont remember much abt gatekeeper other than hes weird gross and horrible
i actually have so many ideas around what specific scenes would look like and what id add maybe ill doodle some of it at some point… i hope u enjoyed this word vomit CFHASKICJHNSGKDG id talk abt it more but my brain is completely fried now
ohhh your brain is so huge for the masked man being jun.. i love that a lot, they were both insanely disadvantaged by the Non-Special / Special Student system, kaname basically betrays both tatsumi and jun by passing off tatsumi’s jobs back to the specials and continues mistreating jun for the sake of his persona.. i can see both tatsumi and jun being the masked man actually they both fit so well for the role
in regards to the old man actually for a hot second i pictured merumeru themself as the senior with ibara as their aide becos theyre the one who plans kaname’s next actions and directly feeds him information and commands to lead him towards success.. something something within the context of baba yaga, merumeru catch on to kaname’s burgeoning desire for love and affection (ice cream!!), promising it if kaname’s able to succeed in assimilating the himeru persona, stringing him along with subtle but addicting motions of affection.. yeah…….. i have been thinking so hard about kaname baba yaga
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bratkook · 4 years
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rough hands. (m) jjk
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pairing : tattooed!jungkook x tattooed!reader (slight fuckboy!jk)
word count : 12k, (i hate myself why cant i ever write anything shorter than 10k goodbye)
genre : (fr)enemies to lovers, smut, this is for @mygukandonly​ ty for the idea and for sharing my thirst for jungkook lmao also ps. if you read this/enjoy it pls reblog bc tumblrs tags are dead af tysm
warnings : overstimulation, dirty talk (its kinda sweet tho?), playful banter during sex, unprotected sex
summary : how is he meant to confess that he’d tear off his left arm for you if you asked when he can see the way you look at him in disgust when his nervous rambling leads to retelling the raunchy stories of girl’s past
The muffled sound of your roommate and his best friend laughing in the kitchen can be heard through your bedroom wall, a smile spreading across your face when you hear Hoseok’s telltale joyous laugh, no doubt in the middle of telling a story. 
You rake your fingers through your hair once more, fluffing it up and stepping back from the mirror to give yourself a once over, your hands tugging down on the tight dress you had on. The black shiny latex hugging your curves in all the right spots and you smirk as excitement fills you when you think of the dumb shit you and your best friend Rina were going to get into tonight.
In the kitchen Hoseok pours another shot for himself and Jungkook, the two of them energized at going out tonight as well, the video game demo they had been working on at work had gotten approved, being given the green light to move further into it so they would be celebrating tonight. The rest of his friends were set to arrive at your shared apartment for some pregame drinks before they left to their designated bar of choice.
“Y/N! Take a shot.” Hoseok shouts out when you step out of the hallway, his head peeking out by the breakfast bar to see you. He’s wearing a simple white tshirt, his colorful tattooed arms on full display as he holds out a shot glass for you to take. As you step closer to grasp it Jungkook’s eyes bulge out at what you’re wearing, he chooses to throw back his shot, letting the burn of tequila take his mind off how hot you looked. Jungkook has had it bad for you for so long, you and Jungkook have ran in the same circle since high school, not exactly friends but there was always a mutual friend linking you two together.
Jeon Jungkook has always been shameless, even at the young age of 16, when his hair was all bangs and the only thing on his mind was bands, shows, and girls. His debauchery only worsened in college when his muscles bulked up and he started experimenting with tattoos, there is nothing horny college girls love more than a man with long black hair and inked sleeves so of course he embraced it. 
The social circle you two shared slowly dwindled away after the first year of college as people dropped out, moved out of state or started a career while you finished your schooling. Because of that, you hadn’t really seen or heard much about Jungkook during your last year of college, not sure if he ever finished, dropped out or took a year off. It wasn’t until fate had you responding to a room mate needed ad that lead you to Jung Hoseok and in turn leading you right back to Jeon Jungkook, full circle.
And in that reunion it was made clear that he had stayed exactly the same, the same 16 year old mentality trapped inside a bulked out tattooed man, his new found goal being getting under your skin because he loved seeing you upset.
Your eyes meet Jungkook’s as you grab the shot glass, standing right beside Hoseok as he pours himself yet another shot. He just smirks at you, noticing your added height with the platform shoes you have on, “If you wear those shoes you can get on all the rides at Disney.”
He hides his smile behind the glass, seeing you roll your eyes as you throw back the shot, glaring at him once you swallow it, “Oh shut up, I’m normal sized, it’s not my fault you’re a fucking Titan.”
Hoseok laughs loudly at your comeback, his shoulders nudging Jungkook and seeing him fighting back a smile at your reaction, “Touché.”
The contents of the tequila bottle start to dry out so Hoseok pushes it away, opting for grabbing a cup to start making drinks to pace himself until his friends show up. You have the beginnings of a buzz warming you up, sliding out your phone to see that Rina texted you to come over, wanting to pregame as well before you went out together.
As you start texting her back your ears tune in to the story Jungkook had decided to start telling, reminiscing on the last time they had all gone out to that dive bar. His hands are animated as he tells Hoseok about the drunk girl he had his eyes on, the both of them ending up in the gross bathroom while she gave him a sloppy blowjob, stopping halfway through to puke all over the floor and how it had absolutely wounded his ego. Him and Hoseok are bent over in hysterics as you lock your phone and roll your eyes, like clockwork Jungkook had to start talking about his sexual escapades, “And that’s my cue to fuck off.”
You shove your phone into your tiny side bag as you start to walk away and Jungkook presses his lips together as he realizes once again he said something he shouldn’t have. Hoseok turns to look at you, “You sure you don’t wanna come out with us? It’ll be more fun than that fetish club you’re into.”
You laugh at him, acting as if he didn’t frequent that club as well, “Is Iseul joining you?”
He frowns at the mention of his girlfriend, getting a little sad that she would in fact not be joining him, “No, she’s got an early shift tomorrow so she cant.”
“Sorry but if she’s not there I’m not interested.” You tease with a shrug, throwing your arm up in a wave before leaving your apartment, the door slamming behind you.
Jungkook instantly sulks once you’re gone, mentally slapping himself for always managing to say stupid shit around you. He couldn’t help himself, the small crush he had spawned in high school when you were still the timid girl that wore band tees two sizes too big, and now that you had matured into this, all leather and stockings and tattoos that rivaled his, that crush had bloomed and with it came plenty of wet dreams and fantasies. 
He knew he stuck his foot in his mouth every time you two ended up in the same vicinity but his usual confident and cocky self became a nervous fucking wreck around you. His brain chose to either rile you up with mean jokes or let his mouth run on autopilot. Unfortunately the only two topics programmed in consisted of shit regarding his job as an audio engineer for video games or his raunchy one night stands. More often than not it was the latter, talking about vulgar things made you walk away, if he talked about technical shit that you didn’t know about, it left room for questions from you and more of a chance for him to embarrass himself.
He uncaps the tequila bottle again and tips it back, taking a swig from the bottle and accepting that he’d have to live with annoying you from afar.
Its not until you come home that night, absolutely hammered, while hes there that he gets the first glimpse that maybe his dreams aren’t so far fetched. He’s stood in the doorway between the kitchen and living room, the buzz of the night having left him a while ago, a bowl of cheerios in his hand that he’s currently shoveling into his mouth when you stumble in, tripping over the doors threshold as you giggle and attempt to shut it quietly as to not wake up Hoseok.
Jungkook smirks with a mouthful of cereal as you press your forehead against the door and double over in hushed laughter, no doubt remembering something stupid that happened earlier. “You okay?” He finally speaks up, scaring you, you whip around in shock and slam your back against the door, a small whimper of pain leaving you as you slide down until your butt meets the floor.
“Oh shit.” He sets his bowl down and goes over to make sure you’re okay, your body is slumped on the floor with your legs sprawled out and he forces himself to just stare at your face, a small frown on it now that you realize how drunk you are. But thanks to that, the usual dont touch me attitude you normally have is missing, letting Jungkook scoop you up by the arms. He swallows as his fingers go down to tug the hem of your dress since it had rode up from you sliding down, his fingers lingering slightly on your thigh.
Your head lolls over now that he’s holding you up and away from the wall, a small smile on your face as you stare at him, your finger coming up to gently prod at the bar he has in the center of his lip, seeing them curl up as well because fuck are you drunk.
Your eyes are having trouble focusing on him with the dim light and the two shots you took just as you left the bar finally settling into your system but you make him out just fine, the weird orange glow coming from the kitchen illuminating him enough for you to see him. “You’re really cute in this lighting.” You slur out.
Jungkook just blushes, not knowing how to respond to you because you complimenting him was not the norm. When your brain decides that your head is far too heavy to hold up it drops back, showing him the expanse of your neck and the beautiful peony you have at the side of it, just under your ear, leading up to the spot where your neck meets your collarbone and Jungkook can’t stop himself from thinking of sucking hickeys into the skin there, the purple splotches coloring the blackwork tattoo.
“Wow, you’re sloshed.” He hauls you up, the muscles on his body clearly not being for show as he carries you to your room. He flicks the light on and gently places you on your mattress, hearing you groan in protest but otherwise not moving. His hands start to unbuckle the straps to your shoes, cute leopard print platform heels with the words doll face adorning the toe strap and it was very much you.
They land on your hardwood floor with a loud thud but you don’t register it, your eyes staying shut as you shove your face into your sheets. He opts for leaving you in your dress, shoes were fine but clothing was uncharted territory so he just unfolds the fluffy throw blanket at the edge of your bed and drapes it over you. His hands turn you over until you’re on your side, a stack of pillows at your back so he knows you won’t run the risk of choking on your puke if the situation arises. When he knows you’re no longer at risk of dying he starts to get up, your hands coming to grasp his and it startles him to see your drunk eyes blinking at him softly.
Your lips are moving but he can’t make out what you’re saying so he inches closer, “Huh?”
When hes about a foot away your hands cup his cheeks and bring him in for a quick kiss, the scent of vodka filling his nose as he feels the softness of your lips, “Thank you Jungkookie.” The phrase slurs together in an almost incomprehensible sentence but he hears it as he pulls back, your eyes shutting and your hands dropping and laying limp beside you as you knock out.
Jungkook just stands at the edge of your bed, watching you sleep for a moment before he scurries out to the living room, forgetting about his cereal and collapsing onto the couch to crash, his hands rubbing his eyes almost as if he’s trying to wake himself up from the dream he swears hes in.
His night had been restless, he couldn’t even blame it on sleeping on a couch, he usually did that when he and Hoseok went out and he had to carry his best friend home. No his dreams had consisted of you and that damned latex dress, the small innocent kiss you gave him spurring him on, so he was thankful when he woke up and no longer had to be scared of you walking in on him saying some shit in his sleep.
Hes currently sprawled out on the couch, shirtless with his grey sweats on, one hand tucked behind his head as the other fiddled with his phone, scrolling through instagram and shamelessly rewatching your story for the millionth time. He just couldn’t stop replaying a video of you speaking into the camera, very drunk with a massive smile as you tried to get your friend who was in the background to face the camera, erupting into a laugh that made him smile along.
His finger presses down on his screen, pausing the video as his ears pick up the sound of a bedroom door opening, either Hoseok was up or you were. He wasn’t sure who he was hoping for but when he sees his friend walk out of his room with bedhead he wishes it was you.
Hoseok smacks his lips together a few times, his squinty eyes looking at Jungkook as he smiles, “How’d those jäger shots treat you?”
Jungkook laughs as he recalls Hoseok egging everyone on to take more of them, sitting up and ruffling his wavy hair, “I can still bounce back as quick as I did when I was 16.”
Hoseok just groans, his palm rubbing his forehead, “Wait until you hit 26.” He waddled into the kitchen and begins rummaging around, the sound of pills shaking in a container being a telltale sign that Hoseok desperately needed advil.
“Hungry?” He calls out and Jungkook hums in response, he was very hungry, he hadn’t wanted to get up and make himself food since last time he did he had mistakenly used up the last of your oat milk and you had been furious, tossing the empty carton at his head when you had tried to make yourself a bowl of cereal. “You cool with pancakes?”
“Dude you could give me a still frozen eggo waffle and I’d be grateful.”
Hoseok laughs loudly at his statement, pots and pans clanking together as he sets up and Jungkook winces, your bedroom shared a wall with the kitchen so it was only a matter of time until the noise woke you up.
It takes roughly 15 minutes of Hoseok chatting and the noise of the mixer to stir you from your sleep. Your mouth is dry and your eyes are pulsing from your headache when you fully awake, pushing yourself up from your bed you’re confused as to how you even got into it. The black dress you wore dug into your skin, the straps leaving deep imprints in your shoulders from the way you slept.
“What the hell.” You moan out, rolling your neck and staring down at the mountain of pillows that were laid out in a specific shape. Had Hoseok hauled your ass to bed last night?
The muffled sounds of chatter start back up, the smell of pancakes slipping under the crack in your door and you grin, hoping Hoseok had added chocolate chips into the mix.
Pancakes were a necessity right now, your stomach felt hollow and from past experiences if you waited too long to eat after drinking all night your hangover would last way longer, so you stand up, your sore feet aching as you shuffle to your drawers and pull out comfortable clothes.
When your door creaks open Jungkook stops talking, his fork staying impaled in the pancakes as the sound of your feet padding on the hardwood floor gets closer. Hes sat on the tall barstool facing the breakfast bar, Hoseok stood on the other side of it, both of them in the middle of eating when you finally show yourself.
Your eyes zero in on Jungkook and you frown, hes sitting shirtless, half of his back and side facing you, letting you see the swirls of black ink that cover the majority of his body. Your eyes follow the dragon that starts on his shoulder, tracing the head all the way down as its body curves and twists until the tail peaks away under the hem of his sweats, but you can’t drool over him, no matter how delicious he looked so you opt for being a brat.
“Don’t you have a home?”
Hoseok chokes on his laughter, seeing Jungkooks cheeks redden as he stares back at his plate. Did you not remember planting one on him last night? You were very drunk but c’mon, could the universe throw him a bone for once.
“Here, your stacks are over there, chocolate chips and all.” Hoseok flicks behind him, your gaze following and seeing the plate of pancakes with your name written all over it. The smile you have contrasts deeply with the look you had just given Jungkook, you were a sucker for chocolate chip pancakes.
You walk into the kitchen space and fix yourself up a plate, scooping out some of the leftover eggs in the pan and choosing to stand next to Hobi instead of sitting beside Jungkook. You’re both crammed on the small counter space beside the sink, the two of you had never gotten around to buying a dining table and always suffered the consequences so you always managed. 
You lift up the plate to your nose and inhale, sighing in appreciation, “Hoseok, Iseul is one lucky lady. Why hasn’t she put a ring on it yet?” You tease, setting the plate down and grabbing the syrup bottle to drown your pancakes in the sticky goodness.
Jungkook is blatantly staring at your plate in disgust, his eyes looking between his plate and your own, your pancakes covered in the thick syrup, the excess dripping off and pooling into your eggs.
“Jesus what.” You snap, setting the bottle down rather aggressively, sending him daggers as his face scrunches up at your food.
“Thats fucking disgusting.”
“You like your pancakes bone dry, I don’t fucking judge you so don’t judge me. We’ll see who’s laughing when you’re choking on your dry ass food.”
Hoseok just stands there as he eats his eggs, a stupid smirk on his face as you banter like children. It’s always entertaining for him, he wishes he could record every interaction because you and Jungkook were the same person, the same sick sense of humor and quick drags made for some interesting comebacks.
He can see Jungkook getting increasingly flustered as you both continue shooting insults at each other about breakfast food, the dreaded oat milk fiasco being brought up and when you point your fork at Jungkook threateningly thats when Hoseok steps in as referee. “Alright, alright children enough!”
He raises his arms up, silencing you both and forcing you to drop your makeshift weapon, “Jungkook, you know the oat milk scandal is a sensitive subject so minus 10 points for bringing it up.” Jungkook glares when you poke your tongue out at him, “And Y/N, Jungkooks right, you drowning your shit in syrup is disgusting so minus 15 points for that.” And now Jungkook is grinning at you mockingly, enjoying the shock on your face as you look at Hoseok, calling him a traitor and picking up your plate to go eat in your room since no one fucking appreciates me in this stupid house!
When your door slams shut Jungkook chuckles, his tongue prodding at his cheek as he shakes his head and resumes eating his breakfast. Hoseok holds his coffee cup next to his lip as he stares at his friend, “You two fight like a married couple.”
Jungkook’s reaction is immediate, scoffing and rolling his eyes, “She’s just annoying.”
Hoseok hums, nodding along like he believes Jungkook, “Ah, so are we both still pretending you don’t have it bad for her?”
That gets a real reaction from the younger boy, his eyes darting to the wall that you share with the kitchen before glaring back at his friend, “Dude!” He whines, his shoulders sagging, “Do you want her to hear you?” Hoseok just cackles, grabbing his dishes and placing them in the sink to start washing them. Jungkook just continues grumbling to himself, his fork clanking against the plate as he stabs his pancakes aggressively.
“Give yourself some credit Kook, she doesn’t hate you like you think she does.” Jungkook found that hard to believe, your morning greeting of accusing him of being homeless due to him always being at your place showed him how you really felt, but last night was the first time he had felt like maybe deep down you thought he was cute enough to kiss.
“Last night,” he starts off, setting his fork down, “she came home at like 4am totally wasted, I don’t even know how she managed to climb the stairs up to the front door. I carried her to bed and she uh, she kissed me.” He whispers the last part, his eyes glancing at the shared wall again, praying you were listening to music and not hearing this conversation.
Hoseok shuts off the faucet, whipping around with wide eyes, “Huh? Like coherently kissed you with tongue down your throat or like drunk peck kissed you?”
“The second one.”
The expression on Hoseoks face doesn’t comfort Jungkook, he’s pouting in sympathy, “I mean, she kisses Iseul with tongue and everything-”
“Okay but-wait what?” Jungkook stops himself from interrupting further, his interested piqued in hearing about you and Hoseok’s girlfriend making out. It was a regular occurrence, if you both got drunk enough the compliments began and before Hoseok knew it you and his girlfriend were swapping spit and then acting like nothing happened as you entered the dance floor.
His friend rolls his eyes at the look Jungkook throws at him, “Yeah, I think Iseul loves her more than me.”
“Okay well tell her to get in fucking line.” Jungkook jokes, “But no, she kissed me last night and considering she doesn’t like me within her bubble it has to mean something right?”
Hoseok pats his hands dry as he approaches the breakfast bar again, Jungkook looks unsure, his teeth nibbling on his lip piercing as he stares at him. The conversation had switched over drastically from Jungkook pretending he wouldn’t lay his body across a puddle of water for you to cross, now he looked like a nervous teenager that didn’t want to get rejected by his crush.
“I don’t know dude, you’re gonna have to say something to find out.”
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Hoseok knew more than he would ever tell Jungkook, you had openly confessed to wanting to climb him like a tree only if he wore a muzzle a few months back so Hoseok knew Jungkook had a chance at least. The only issue was he wasn’t sure just sleeping with you would be enough for his friend, the crush he had been harboring was too strong for a one night stand and he wasn’t convinced you’d want the same so Hoseok kept his mouth shut, letting you two figure it out.
He tried his best to make it so you two would be around each other, always inviting Jungkook over or inviting you out with them but Jungkook never did himself any favors, he needed you guys to hang out in a different environment that didn’t require loud music and other girls so when his girlfriend suggests taking a weekend trip to her family’s lake cabin he doesn’t think twice before inviting you to join.
The weather lately had been miserable, the highs skyrocketing into the 100s so you didn’t hesitate to say yes, on the condition that you could bring your best friend with you just in case the rest of Hoseoks friends were just as immature as Jungkook was.
When the day comes you and your friend have to leave a few hours after the rest of the group does, having to wait for Rina to get off her short morning shift before you embark on the 2 hour drive. So walking into the cabin you’re met with some unfamiliar faces staring back at you from their place on the couch. You give a wave, spotting Iseul on a lounger, she smiles widely and hops up, bounding over to you and wrapping you in a hug.
“Yay, you made it!” She pulls back and greets Rina, standing beside you both and gesturing to the full room. “Guys this is Y/N and Rina.” They all wave back as she starts to introduce them in order, Jimin had red hair and a nose ring, Yoongi had grey hair and a rose tattoo on his hand, The last one to be introduced is Taehyung, brown hair and a wide smile, giving you and your friend a wave. Jungkook and Hoseok give you a wave as well, no introductions needed for them.
Due to your late arrival all the rooms have already been decided on, Jimin and Yoongi lucking out with securing the master suite but you and Rina had no complaints, grateful to have even been invited.
Now that introductions were out of the way and everyone was here Hoseok announces that hes gonna start up the grill outside to make some food. Everyone gets up to start assisting but you and Rina head back out to haul your bags in along with the alcohol and groceries you bought.
The weather is humid and gross, your skin tacky with sweat so you’re wearing the least amount of clothing you can. Already in a stringy gray bikini, a loose cut up tank top and the shortest shorts Jungkook has ever seen on you. Your tattoos on full display, the florals that cover your entire left arm, reaching your shoulder, he follows them up and over his eyes glued to the bold lines on your back that peek out when your shirt moves.
When you bend over to set down the box of drinks he stares at your ass, trailing down the soft skin of your thighs that were bare compared to the rest of your body. Tae elbows him harshly, “So thats Y/N I’m assuming?”
Jungkook grunts in response, swallowing when he sees you pull your hair up, exposing your neck and that tattoo he desperately wants to mark up, “You ever gonna make a move?”
“I don’t have the balls.”
Tae hums, “Great, well I do so see ya.” He slaps his arm and Jungkook thinks hes joking until Taehyung actually makes his way over to you, offering to help carry your bag to your room upstairs. The grateful smile you give him makes Jungkooks face twitch, you only ever smiled at him like that when you were wasted
Taehyung wasn’t actually going to hit on you, he wasn’t a cruel friend. He was just going to flirt harmlessly, give Jungkook a reason to fucking make a move. Rina is all giggles as she watches you follow Tae up the stairs, pointing towards the room you had been assigned.
As he walks in front of you, making friendly conversation you take the time to stare at him. It seems all of Jung Hoseoks friends were fucking god sent, Tae’s fluffy brown hair and kind eyes were easy to warm up to, his style more toned down than Jungkooks, only a few minimal tattoos scattered on his arms.
He sets your bag down on the bed and turns to you with his hands on his hips, “Thank you.” You mutter out, walking over to the window and shutting the blinds slightly to stop the sun from beating into the room and warming it up further.
“Yeah no problem, have you ever been here before?” He asks, making himself comfy on your bed.
“No, never. Super glad to finally have a friend who can say they have a lake house though.”
He agrees whole heartedly, the both of you making your way back out of the room and into the dining room to try to see what you could help out with.
It only takes less than a hour for everyone to gather around the table, munching on their hamburgers and hotdogs as you listen to Hoseok, Yoongi and Iseul talking about the summers they used to spend here during high school, all of them having grown up together.
“You two went to high school together also right?” Iseul speaks up when the laughter dies down, her fingers pointing between you and Jungkook. She smirks to herself when she sees the look on Jungkook’s face, swatting Hoseoks hand away from her side as he tries to pinch her for putting the two of you on the spot, he knows what shes up to.
“Oh, yeah we did.” You sigh, shaking your head as you think back to high school and all the cringeworthy things that happened. “Had a lot of mutual friends but uh, we didn’t have lake house summer hangouts like you guys did. The closest we got was backyard house shows during the summer that reeked of B.O.”
Jungkook lets out a laugh, nodding along as he remembers the shows your group would end up at. The group you had was a pretty huge on, all of the kids in your grade that liked the same music tended to bunch together and do things as a herd so even though you technically went to shows together it wasn’t one on one.
“Wait, do you remember that show the summer after high school where I dove off the stage–“
“Your dumbass always did that.”
He waves you off, determined to tell the story he sort of remembered, “I know, but this time all I remember was jumping off and then waking up with everyone huddled around me trying to call an ambulance.”
Your eyes widen as you recall the exact day he was talking about, it was a typical backyard show with too many underaged kids getting drunk off beer. Everything was set up like it normally was, a makeshift stage and amps against the brick wall with a small crowd huddled around it. The only difference was this house had a pool, an empty one, and although everyone had been cautioned to stay away, once people got hammered nothing mattered.
The crowd surrounding the stage was teetering close to the edge of the pool so you and your friend at the time chose to watch from the sidelines, and thats when a very drunk 17 year old Jungkook hopped onto the stage, wobbling onto the top of the drum kit and catapulting himself into the crowd. They had managed to catch him and started crowd surfing him back, right into the empty pool. Jungkook had been tossed into the deep end, head first and you had seen it all happen.
“There was so much fucking blood.” You shiver as you recall the group of you running into the pool to make sure he was alive. He had managed to bust his head open and as you saw him with blood dripping down his head you realized then that you really didn’t dislike him as much as you claimed you did because you really didn’t want him to die.
Jungkook throws his head back and laughs loudly, morbidly recalling how his friends had told him to go to the hospital in fear that he had a concussion or needed stitches and even though he said he was fine he was lowkey scared to sleep that night and not wake up the morning after.
Everyone laughs along, enjoying the way Jungkook turns a traumatic story into casual conversation. When Jimin asks what he did after he gained consciousness Jungkook just smirks as he drinks the last of his beer before shrugging, “I drank some more and got back into the crowd.”
You just cover your face in second hand embarrassment at the memory, a few laughs slipping out because yeah it had been slightly traumatic but also kinda funny.
“Have you changed much since high school?” You lift your head and see Taehyung had addressed his question to you and Jungkook chuckles under his breath, remembering your quiet demeanor.
It wasn’t until college that you came out of your shell, gaining confidence and experimenting with your fashion and hair colors, the tattoos covering your body increasing quickly. But Jungkook could say your personality has stayed the same, sure you were no longer timid, quick to bite back now but the personality he had found himself latching onto had stayed the same. Even when you two distanced yourselves he always thought of you, he liked to think it was fate that had you and him both knowing Hoseok.
“Definitely, for the better though.” Jungkook eyes his friend like a hawk, the small smirk on his face as he stares at you from across the table, making eye contact for a second before looking back at you. Jungkook sees the way you lean on the table, your cheeks tinting when you see the way he stares at you.
“I’d love to see photos, ya know, to compare.” The laugh you let out has Jungkook sulking. Taehyung was charming, all the girls flocking to him and usually Jungkook was the same but he turned into a jackass around you.
Hoseok sees his sulking friend and claps his hands to get everyones attention, “Alright I’m sure we’re all still sober enough to not fucking drown, lets go swim. I’m melting.”
Rina heads to the room to change since she was still in her work uniform so you wait for her on the back deck, resting on the porch rail and watching as they haul over fold out chairs and floaties to the water.
If you thought Hoseoks friends were hot fully clothed seeing them all taking their shirts off left you speechless, you stand with a wine cooler in your hand as one by one they start undressing. The only ones missing were Tae and Jungkook, both of them having been put on clean up duty.
“I wish this was a brazzers video and I was getting railed by all of them.” Your friend sighs as she pops up beside you and you just nod along, the two of you wiggling your eyebrows at each other.
“You coming?” Taehyung speaks up behind you, smiling to himself from having heard your friends statement and you two jump, your friend scattering away and saving herself from further embarrassment, she had her eyes set on Yoongi so thats who she was currently warming up to.
“Yeah,” you breathe out, taking in his shirtless body, his toned chest out in the sun like the golden god he was and then out comes Jungkook, his long black hair pushed off his face, fully shirtless in black swim trunks. As he stands next to Taehyung your mouth waters at the sight of both of them, Taehyung’s shoulders were wider than Jungkooks but the black and grey art work spanned across both of his arms and chest, leading to his back is definitely your type.
He catches you staring and smiles to himself, making a show of stretching his arm out to wrap around Taehyungs shoulders, shaking up his body, “Race you in?”
When he looks at you too you gulp down the last bit of your drink, setting down the bottle and slipping out of your clothes, not giving them a second glance as you scream out “Go!” and take off.
The dirt you run on slightly burns your feet and when you hear Jungkook and Taehyung catching up you scream, urging your legs to pick up the pace.
“Loser has to skinny dip!” Taehyung adds on to the rules, enjoying the annoyed look Jungkook sends his way, he knew what Taehyung was doing so he lurches forward until he’s right behind you.
You scream again when large tattooed arms wrap around you and haul you up and over their shoulder in a flash. You register that it’s Jungkook when you peak up and see Taehyung struggling to keep up, how Jungkook was able to carry you while also beating him had him baffled.
Jungkook would be damned if you had to strip in front of his friend so he feels no remorse, a smile stretching across his face when he hears you laughing, his hands are wrapped around your thighs just below your butt and he’s tempted to smack it but the cold water of the lake splashing onto his legs snaps him out of it.
“Fuck!” You screech as Jungkook enters the lake, the freezing water shocking you and he laughs again, sliding you off his shoulder to stand up on the lake bed.
“I didn’t expect it to be that cold.” He shivers next to you, dunking his head into the water before popping back up, his labret piercing glimmering in the sun.
Taehyung makes a show of splashing his way in, the water spraying everywhere and it has you shielding your face with a laugh, “Fucking cheater, is this your plan to see me naked Jungkookie?”
Jungkook smacks the water, the droplets spraying across Taehyungs face but he embraces it, laying back to float on the water with a smile, “No one said anything about getting naked until you spoke up, just say you wanna show off your monster cock and go.” He jokes, hearing Taehyung explode into laughter, choking slightly on the water as his head slips under from laughing.
You roll your eyes at the topic of dicks, “I don’t have a monster cock, unless you’re into that.” Taehyung teases you, trying to get further under Jungkook’s skin
“I could be.” You play along, it was now Jungkooks turn to roll his eyes, sinking further into the water until only his eyes were visible, could he drown himself here? He’s pretty sure you wouldn’t even notice if he didn’t come back up for air considering your eyes were glued to his friend. Jungkook was going to fucking strangle Hoseok for inviting him.
His eyes drift over to the right, seeing Hoseok, Iseul, Yoongi & Rina taking turns jumping off of it while Jimin floats on a flamingo floatie a few feet away. He starts to paddle his way over, not hearing any protest from you or his friend just reassures him that he made the right choice.
When Taehyung deems Jungkook is far enough he calls you closer, “Wanna know a secret?” That piques your interest, inching towards him with a curious face, “What if I told you I know someone who has a massive heart on for you.”
“Heart on?”
He laughs again, raking his hair off his face and nodding at you, “Yeah heart on, like a boner but for your heart.”
Note to self, yes all of Jung Hoseoks friends were just as immature as Jungkook was.
“I would tell you that I hope the person you say isn’t secretly married with kids.”
He floats onto his back again, his arms lazily paddling him to circle around you, “Oh no, our Jungkookie is definitely single.” He brings one hand up to cover his mouth, pretending to have slipped up.
“So what you’re saying is you don’t wanna fuck me?”
Your response is not one he expects but the way he bursts into laughter makes you smile, you had caught on to Taehyung’s antics, noting how he was friendly when you two were alone and only amped his flirting when Jungkook was present. You weren’t sure why he was using you to irritate Jungkook but if what he said was true it surprised you.
His loud laugh draws everyones attention and he rights himself up as to not choke on water again, “Like a brazzers video was it?” He teases, “He told me about your little smooch a few weeks ago.”
“Im sorry our little what?”
He wipes the water off his face, “Yeah, you came home drunk as fuck and he took you to bed and your predator ass planted one on him, with no consent. Shame on you.”
You splash water onto him, Jungkook sees it from his spot on the pier, a scowl on his face at seeing you acting playful with his friend, blissfully unaware that he was the topic of your discussion.
“Can you please grow a pair and tell her you love her.” Iseul moans out when she sees the look on the youngests face.
“Wait what?” Your friend asks and Jungkook turns around to give Iseul and Hoseok an exasperated look, “Seriously?”
Iseul just shrugs from her spot sat on the wood, not giving a damn about outing his crush in front of your friend and Hoseok just smiles, his foot planting on the center of Iseuls back and giving her a shove until she screams as she gets pushed into the water, beer bottle and all. He gives Jungkook a highfive until Iseul pops back up, her eyes full of rage as she holds up her ruined drink, “Jung Hoseok what the fuck!”
“Sorry babe, you kinda deserved it.”
Rina nudges Jungkook with her knee, her face making it very clear that Jungkook needs to fess up before she very loudly called you over. He sighs and hauls himself up until he’s standing and even though he’s towering over her Rinas face doesn’t soften, “Stop staring at me like that.” He grunts, “I just have a crush on her, its not like I confessed to something despicable.”
She crosses her hands over her chest as she stares at you and Taehyung still talking in the water and she can tell you’re not into him, you were both playful but she knew you very well, your flirting tactics not coming out to play with Taehyung but Jungkook doesn’t seem to notice this. She also knew that you’d secretly bend over for Jungkook if he ever asked but he didn’t have to know that right now, “Well you better say something cause it looks like your buddys making more progress in one day than you have the entire time you’ve known her.”
He groans in annoyance again, flicking water droplets at her face and deciding he was over this conversation, walking back to the cabin, not caring that he was dripping water everywhere.
You see him stalking away looking pissed off and Taehyung smirks, after coming to terms with the fact that you had in fact kissed Jeon Jungkook it only took a few more minutes of talking for you to also start confessing to not exactly being opposed to sleeping with him as well. Taehyung nudges your shoulder, “I swear to god if you don’t follow him I will be offended. No ones telling you to bang him, just talk because he swears you hate him.”
When you turn to glare at him he spits water at you until you’re relenting, “Fine, but if this is some sick prank I’ll shove my foot up your ass.”
“Ooh kinky.” He winks at you, laughing and beginning to paddle away when you turn and start wading out of the water. The sun beats on your back as you step out of the cold water, and you’re tempted to just go back and act like your conversation with Taehyung never happened but you’re curious now.
When you reach the back porch you hose yourself down, getting rid of any of the mud you trudged over before patting yourself dry with the towel you laid over the porch railing.
From the pier Iseul is pulling herself back up, announcing that she was about to go inside but Hoseok grabs her, all of them noticing you following Jungkook, “Fuck no, Y/N and Jungkook are the only ones in the house.”
She lets Hoseok keep his arms wrapped around her and smiles, crediting herself for being the one to push you two together and Hoseok groans, attempting to push her back into the water but she latches onto him, making them both tumble in with a splash.
You shut out their screams when you step into the house and close the sliding door, entering the kitchen and spotting Jungkook stood against the island, one of your wine coolers held against his lips. When he sees you staring at it he pulls it away quickly, “Shit, I’m sorry. I should’ve asked before grabbing one.” The last thing he needed was another oat milk fiasco.
You just shrug as you approach the island, resting your body against the granite across from him, “Nah, help yourself. Whats got your panties in a bunch?”
He sets the bottle down softly as he watches you, your hands clasped together, stretched out in front of you as you bent over the counter innocently. His teeth tug at the bar in the center of his lip, his inky strands covering his eyes but you can see his gaze peeking through, “Did I ever do anything to you for you to dislike me this much?”
You straighten up at his question, a frown tugging at your lips, you didn’t dislike him, you found him immature and he liked to push your buttons on purpose but you knew he was harmless. Obviously Jungkook didn’t know this considering Taehyung had just told you he thinks you hate him. “What, Jungkook I don’t dislike you?”
He scoffs, taking a swig of his drink with his brows raised, not believing you in the slightest, “Then why are you so mean to me when ever I’m around you.”
“Because you’re mean to me! You always say shit to get under my skin.”
Jungkook laughs at that, pushing his hair back and tossing the empty bottle into the paper bag set up on the counter, “Yeah because you’re easy to annoy.”
Your arms stretch out at his statement, “And so are you, you don’t see me moping like a baby. Besides I didn’t do anything to you out there so don’t try to pin your bad attitude on me today.”
He opens the fridge again, pulling out a water bottle instead before turning back around and staring at you, “Really, you didn’t do anything?”
You glare right back at him, walking around to meet him and snatch the water bottle out of his hands, call it even for him taking one of your wine coolers. “Please enlighten me on how I managed to ruin your day by not saying a word to you.”
Between you two running into the lake until he paddled away the only exchange you had was a curse word & Jungkook acknowledging the freezing water, where could you have possibly pissed him off.
He chooses on foregoing grabbing another water, his hands crossing over his chest, the muscles bulging out at the action but you force yourself to look away, “You objectifying my friend and talking about his monster cock isn’t you doing anything?”
You freeze from drinking the water, your cheeks ballooning out as you keep it in your mouth because what the fuck. Objectifying? You swallow the liquid, full on laughing now, theres no way he’s being serious. “You were the one that brought up his dick, are you dense?”
Okay, you had him there but he wasn’t going to admit defeat that easy, “Sure and you kept it going.”
You laugh louder at that, twisting the cap back onto the water bottle and tossing it at his chest lightly, smirking when you see him scramble to catch it, “The amount of times I’ve had to hear unwarranted stories about your dick in or around someone is fine but me joking with Taehyung is crossing a line?”
Jungkook presses his lips together, his mind repeating what everyone has been telling him all day. Tell her you jackass. “Yes because it fucking sucks hearing that shit from you.” He bites his tongue, stopping himself from blurting out the most important part, but his statement is enough to get you to believe what Taehyung had said earlier. Did Jungkook actually have a heart on for you?
“Why, are you jealous?”
“Yes.” He admits almost immediately, his response catching you both off guard, but the smirk on your face only gets bigger. Jungkook is wary of your reaction, not exactly fond of the way you look like you just caught your prey. When you reach out, your fingers gently touching his shoulders his wariness only deepens.
“Why would you be jealous about me wanting to fuck your friend?” Jungkook says nothing, your fingers continuing to trail up and down his shoulders softly and he likes the feeling of you touching him, wanting to lean into your touch but he’s not sure if you’re fucking with him or not. “Who knew all it would take was one kiss for Jeon Jungkook to get possessive.”
He blanches at your sentence, “Wait you remember?”
“Of course I do,�� you lie, not wanting to tell him that Taehyung had been the one to remind you. You wanted to see how far you could push him until he admitted to something. The typical Jungkook you were used to was the one who went to bars and clubs and managed to score a handful of girls numbers before taking one home, the countless stories you’ve heard being proof of that. The Jungkook stood in front of you did not live up to the reputation you had seen.
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“I mean you were wasted so I just didn’t think you’d remember...” he trails off, unconsciously stepping back until hes pressed against the fridge.
“You wanna refresh my memory?” You’re half teasing him, half serious, enjoying seeing Jungkook looking like he’s about to explode.
He doesn’t get a chance to respond, the sound of the sliding door making you take a big step back before looking over. Jimin had his head peeking through the opening, a small grimace on his face as he realizes he interrupted something, “Sorry, we’re gonna go tubing if you guys wanna join.”
Jungkook hopes you say no because he can’t find the balls to speak up but you nod instead, turning to face Jungkook again, “Maybe later then.” Is all you say before turning around and following Jimin back out to the lake.
He watches you leave, bending over the island and groaning into the granite, where had that come from and why was he kinda into the way you spoke to him? Jungkook stands back up, taking a gulp of his water and following after you and Jimin.
Even when you’re all gathered on the boat, Rina being dragged in a giant circle tube beside Yoongi the both of them screaming, he can’t get your conversation out of him mind. His eyes focused in on seeing you laughing hysterically as you record your friend, a smile spreading across his face because your laugh is contagious.
When you hop onto the tube next, dragging Taehyung with you to further egg Jungkook on, Jimin slides over beside Jungkook and sighs, “Sorry about barging in earlier.” Jungkook just shakes his head, telling him not to worry about it, he didn’t mind it. Your words had spurred him on and all he wanted to do now was rip off that lifejacket you wore and take you in front of his friends but he knew no one would appreciate it.
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Later in the night everyone gathers inside and does their own thing, a few people playing board games while you retreat into your room, feeling sluggish from the water and sun so you sleep through the dinner everyone eats.
When you finally emerge from the room, your hair damp from your shower you find the living room dimly lit and empty, the clock above the stove letting you know it was 9 at night. There was two plates left out on the counter, wrapped in foil and you knew it was meant for you. As you near it you see the scrap of paper next to it, Iseul’s handwriting standing out.
Left on a hike to go stargazing, text us when its clear to come back.
You frown at the message, what did she mean by that?
Regardless you peel back the foil and smile at the food she had left for you, popping it into the microwave and picking yourself up to hop onto the counter as you wait.
When you slip your phone out and start to scroll through your socials the sound of footsteps coming down the stairs scares you, your eyes flicking up and seeing Jungkook trudging down, a baggy crew neck on him and his face looking flushed from the sun hitting it.
“You didn’t go on the hike?” You ask as he approaches you slowly, his face looks sleepy and you can tell he also took a nap from the way his eyes blink at you lazily.
“Hike?” He rasps out, his hand ruffling up his already messy hair, a small frown on his face from the foggy feeling he still had from just waking up.
“Yeah,” you hum, pulling out your plate and starting to eat it on the counter, “they left on a hike or something. Theres a plate there if you haven’t already eaten.”
He looks at where you’re pointing and he smiles when he sees it, his eyes also spotting the note left and skimming it. His friends were such instigators.
He lingers behind you, torn between eating or doing something to you. You’re hunched over the counter, your legs rocking you against it as you happily much on some of the roasted potatoes. His eyes lingered on your legs, your skin still exposed in a loose pair of cotton shorts, a baggy tshirt hanging off your shoulder and letting him see the tattoo of a bee hovering over a sunflower.
You can feel him stood behind you and you freeze, looking over your shoulder at him with your brows raised, “Why are you standing like that?”
He shakes his head, relaxing the stiff way he stood and leaning against the counter instead, flicking his hair out of his face as you keep staring at him. “Just thinking about what you said earlier.”
You pop a piece of chicken in your mouth as you hum, “What did I say?” pretending to act confused, a smirk curling up on your lip when you see the deadpan look he give you as he pushes off the counter.
The nervous Jungkook from earlier is gone, the shock from you egging him on earlier had passed and it just solidified that he wanted to have you. “About me refreshing your memory of our little rendezvous.”
You laugh at his term, setting your fork down to fully turn to him, “Do you want me to kiss you again?”
He smirks at you, now standing a foot away from you, your back pressed against the counter as you craned your head up to stare at him, “Among other things.”
“Other things?”
“Yeah,” he mumbles, his hand reaching out to cup under your chin gently, “I’d like to bend you over this counter and fuck you until you’re crying. If you’re into that.” He smiles at the small gasp you let out, your eyes gleaming with desire at his words. You had thought you had the one up on him earlier but his change was a welcomed one, you wanted to experience the Jungkook you had heard about, rough and cocky.
You rest back onto your elbows as you stare at him, letting his thumb rub under your lip, “Oh really? Are you all talk?”
Jungkook scoffs, dropping his hands to cage you between him and the counter, his head dropping down a bit until your noses nudged together. “No, I always deliver.”
You don’t get a chance to respond, his head tilting slightly until your lips are together, the cold bar of his piercing pressing against you. Jungkook feels you relax into the kiss, glad that you weren’t pushing him away like he always swore you would. When he tests the water, gently licking his way into your mouth you groan, your hands coming up to clutch onto his sweater to tug him closer until his leg is between yours.
Kissing Jungkook felt natural, maybe it was the pent of sexual frustration you two had apparently had with one another but you just wanted to get to it. You drop one hand to trail down his thigh, palming his growing erection through his sweats.
He groans, pulling back from the kiss to rest his forehead against your, his soft breaths hitting your face as you continue to stroke him. “Feel that?” He hums softly, “Just wanna fuck you.”
You laugh gently, kissing his neck and feeling him roll his hips into your grasp, “How are you supposed to make me cry when you’re this needy?” Your teeth nip his skin, his hips stuttering when you do.
Jungkook just chuckles, the sound continuing when he trails his own hand down until hes dipping into waistband of your shorts, his fingers coming into contact with the wet spot on your underwear, “Keep it up.” He warns, “I’ll remember that in a bit.”
Your hands tighten their hold on him when he pushes your underwear aside to touch you directly, his fingers teasing your skin softly until he’s rolling your clit in a tantalizing manner. When you drop your head back and glare at him he just smiles, “Who’s needy now?”
“Still not crying.” You bite back.
Jungkook looks at you with his brows raised, new set determination on his face as he nods, stepping back from you and hooking his fingers into the waistband of your shorts and underwear, tugging them down your legs in a flash.
The cool air inside hits your wet folds and you gasp, kicking your discarded clothing aside on the floor and letting him drop to his knees in front of you. His long hair falls in front of his eyes, his hands grasping the top of your thighs to slide your legs apart with a grin.
He can see you wanting to speak up so he beats you to the punch, his nose nudging into your clit as he teasingly dips his tongue in between your folds to lick a broad stripe up. You let out a shuddered laugh, your hands reaching down to tangle in his head when he spreads you open with his fingers and starts to eat you out like a man starved.
Your eyes shut, your head falling back at a particular hard suck he gives your clit, his tongue going back to circle around your entrance to lap up your wetness. He groans at the taste of you, your hands tugging at his hair when he falls into a rhythm that has you quivering.
He slips two fingers into you, the feeling of your walls clamping down on him making him moan in anticipation of how you would feel around his cock.
Just like Jungkook is in every aspect of his life, he’s shameless in the way he pleasures you, the sounds of him slurping against you in combination with his fingers thrusting into you has you hurdling towards the edge faster than you’d like to admit.
You rest your weight on your elbow behind you, feeling your legs start to tremble and Jungkook notices, his arm wrapping around your thigh to help stabilize you. He can’t even get himself to gloat at having you fall apart this quickly, instead he enjoys you rolling your hips into his face, tugging his hair hard, your inner walls spasming as you reach your climax.
“Oh fuck.” You moan out, squeezing your eyes shut as your whole body is lit up, Jungkooks tongue continuing to flick your clit as you cum, his fingers slowing down slightly as you come down.
He can hear you breathing harshly, your fingers gently raking through his hair while he gives your pussy one last kiss before hes standing back up. His mouth and chin are covered in your arousal, his hand tugs up his shirt to wipe at his face, peeling it off his body and tossing it carelessly onto the floor.
“You’re not crying but its a start.” He mumbles out, his eyes trailing over your face as you stare at him fucked out. His talk was true, the small tidbits you’ve heard of him being able to make girls cum in record time hadn’t been a lie to boost his ego.
You look between you both, seeing his cock tenting in his sweats and you smile as you reach your hand into them, wrapping around his heavy length. He sees how your eyes widen at his size, you can tell he’s big and you haven’t even properly seen it yet.
When you tug them off you marvel at his size, big dicks would forever be your weakness and of course he’d have one. “I really wanna suck your dick,” you start, a small smile creeping up on your face as you give his cock a small pump, “but I’m not trying to barf my dinner up on the floor. Can’t have two girls puking over your dick in your lifetime right?” You knew his dick would make you choke and if you hadn’t just eaten you wouldn’t care, but barfing was definitely not a kink of yours.
Jungkook rolls his eyes, a laugh escaping his lips, “You’re the worst.” He shuts his eyes as you both start to chuckle. Jungkook doesn’t care, he was trying to make you cry, he didn’t need to have his dick sucked to do that.
“Its not just my height thats Titan size huh.” He jokes, laughing harder when you release his dick and groan, your faux annoyance being shown when you let him slide your shirt off of you, his hands coming up to cup your exposed breasts.
“No, I am not calling your dick Titan sized.”
“Oh no?” He asks, stepping closer until his length is pressed between your folds, a slow thrust starting that has you groaning, “This Titan dick can make you feel real good though.” He can barely utter out the sentence until he’s laughing again, burying his head into your neck at how stupid he sounded.
“You’re insufferable, I swear if you have an attack on titan fantasy I am walking away.” He lets out a playful whine, his mouth latching onto that tattoo he always wanted to kiss, his tongue softly licking at the skin as he sucks it, pulling back and humming when he sees the purple splotch in between the petals of the peony.
“I’m not that big of a weeb, can still make you feel good tho.” He mutters giving your lips another kiss, feeling you smile against him, your hands pushing him back by the chest.
You turn around, bending over the counter and shaking your hips slightly, “Show me.”
He bites his lip, his eyes staring at the slick coating your pussy, trailing down your thighs and he feels his dick twitch, not needing to be told twice. Jungkook presses his length against you, rutting between your folds, the both of you sighing as he coats his dick in your wetness.
“Remember, I wanna see you crying.” Is all he says before he’s pushing into you, the tip of him slipping in and he marvels at the way you spread around his girth as he thrusts further into you, a small moan leaving you when he bottoms out.
You wanna tell him that you won’t be crying tonight but the way he fills you up has you seeing stars, his dick nudging all the right spots inside of you so all you can do is tighten your walls around him and gasp for him to move.
Jungkook grasps your hips, his thumb tracing the outline of your back tattoo as he pulls back and starts a slow pace, determined to find the rhythm that has you falling apart.
When your hands grip the counter in front of you, helplessly trying to find purchase, your fingers knock into your dinner plate and swipe it into the sink beside you but you don’t register the noise and Jungkook grins when he hears the loud moan coming from you when he dick hits the back wall of your cervix.
You’re still sensitive from your last orgasm, so the feel of his thick cock stretching you open has you keening, your hips rutting back to meet his thrusts that have grown in speed, “Who’s needy now huh?” He grunts out, loving the sound of your skin slapping together, “Trying to fuck yourself on my cock, maybe you should do all the work then.”
When his hips still you whimper, twisting your head around to see him giving you an evil smirk, “Go on.” He urges, guiding your hips with his hands to get your started.
A heavy sigh fills the air as your hands press firmly onto the counter to ground yourself as you start to rock back onto him, a slow start until your need to cum again takes over and you speed up your movements.
“Good girl.” He praises, his hand reaching forward to push your hair over your shoulder, his hand trailing down your spine until it reaches your ass, his hand palming your flesh as he groans when he locks into the view of his dick, seeing the way you’re creaming on it.
The sweetest moans reach his ears, he can feel the way your velvety walls tighten around him further, “Fuck Jungkook.” You moan out, you can feel the sweat building up on your skin from exertion and he takes sympathy on you, knowing you want to cum again.
He leans over a presses a kiss against your shoulder before he takes over again, resuming the brutal pace he was pounding you with earlier and you sigh in relief, fully slumping forward and letting him have his way with you.
“You feel so good Jungkookie.” You breathe out and he smiles as he lets his hand slip around to your front, his fingers finding your clit again and the contact has you moaning again. His rough hands helping you reach your peek again, “Oh my god, don’t stop.”
He doesn’t plan on it, loving the way you’re clamping down on him and mumbling nonsense into the cool granite, “Don’t worry, I got you.”
With a few more thrusts you’re falling apart, pressing your forehead against the counter and moaning his name out louder than you thought was possible. Your friends made a good call vacating the house because there was no way you’d be able to keep quiet.
“Thats it.” He coos, pulling his hand away from your clit without slowing down his pace. Your legs felt like jello, glad you had a place to rest on while he continued to jackhammer into you. The first signs of overstimulation started to prick into you, small whines leaving your lips and Jungkook takes notice.
He pulls out of you slowly, his hands grasping your hips to turn you around. Your body is pliable in his hands, letting him move you and haul you up onto the counter, your feet dangling off the edge and a hazy smile on your face.
He presses another kiss against you, letting your tongues tangle together as he grabs your arms and wraps them around his neck, coming back down to hook under your thighs as he slides back into you.
The way you groan into his mouth makes his cock throb, your soaking entrance letting him glide right into you, “Hurts.” You whine out softly when he starts to thrust, not sure if you’d be able to handle another orgasm but Jungkook shushes you softly with another kiss.
“You can do one more for me right baby?” He asks, sucking on your lower lip as he rocks into you slowly. His eyes are half lidded and you can feel how hard he is in you, your body still trembling slightly from your last orgasm but you nod anyways, letting him kiss his way down your face until he reaches your neck again, soft praises leaving his lips.
Your fingers tangle into his hair again as you slump against him, letting him hold you up. You trail along his tattoos, tracing the giant death moth spanned across his collarbone, the tip of the wing reaching the bottom of his neck.
He’s grunting softly against you, getting lost in the feeling of you, the added touches and kisses you plant on his skin igniting the fire inside him. His arms scoop you closer, his hands spreading against your lower back as he speeds up his thrusts, your legs still wrapped around his arms.
The way his dick curves inside you has you moaning again, the pleasure creeping back up and your head falls back as you feel the pressure building again. You’re not sure you could handle coming again but Jungkook seems determined to get you there, rolling into you, the feeling of his pelvis rubbing your clit is too much. Your hands cling onto his back, your fingers digging into the flames and dragon that occupied the space.
“Fuck I can feel you squeezing me.” He gasps out, “You can cum again sweetheart its okay.”
You squeeze your eyes shut, hearing him grunting into your ear, his voice dropping into a gravel as he nears his edge as well. You’re clinging onto him for your life, gasping loudly when you reach your third orgasm of the night, the force of it making your mind go blank.
You don’t tune into to the small shriek of his name, the growl he lets out when you tighten around him tighter than before, his hips rearing into yours in a sloppier way until he’s cumming, hips surging forward to bury himself deeper into you as his cock twitches.
You come back when he moans your name out, the feeling of his cum filling you up making you mewl against him. He thrusts shallowly a few more times before pulling out with a sigh, letting your legs fall limp over the edge.
His cum drips out of you, slipping through your folds and down your ass until it pools onto the counter beneath you and he smirks, his eyes coming up to look at you and his expression gets bigger when he sees the tear streaks on your cheeks. His hand cups them, his thumb sliding across your face and wiping them with a laugh, “I told you I’d make you cry.”
You don’t have it in you to be the usual brat you are with him, not after cumming this hard three times in a row so you just pout at him and lean forward to kiss him again, this time being more gentle and slow paced than the last.
“How was that?” He mumbles against your lips, letting you pull him in to you, wrapping your arms around his tiny waist as you nuzzle into his chest.
Jungkook feels you laughing against his skin, “How was that?” You mock as you give him a squeeze, “Let’s just say I’ll cry over your Titan cock any day.”
The both of you burst into laughter, Jungkook pressing a kiss onto the top of your head as you two just stay there. Jungkook and you had officially crossed the line from being bratty friends to sleeping with each other. Neither of you knew what it meant but it seemed like a conversation for tomorrow morning, right now you were content with just holding him.
So when your phone vibrates beside you you’re reluctant to pull away, so Jungkook compromises by reaching it for you and handing it over.
You see its a message from Iseul and you unlock it, your face heating up as you groan and show the message to Jungkook, his face turning just as red as he sees what she sent.
Iseul 10:15pm : Thank you for the show, I hope you two realize we have security cameras in the kitchen and living room you horn dogs.
The two of you peek over at the corner of the room giving a wave and smiling shyly at the blinking security camera staring back at you. Maybe she could send you the footage for keepsake.
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iluvthingsfree99 · 4 years
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bräñdÿ mēłvïłłē methods!!
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED FOR TEENS! i haven’t seen anyone do this yet so i wanted to share the methods that work for me @ basically any bräñdÿ store !! also i have done all of these with at least one or two of my lifter friends and it has worked so far (knock on wood). 
let’s start off with the precautions to take beforehand:
i HIGHLY recommend having a friend when going into brandy. the stores that are not located on a street or something are generally much smaller (and more difficult to lift from), compared to those in a plaza or mall. the ones in the PLAZAS or MALLS are the best options to go to especially during the pandemic. what i personally like doing a day before lifting is googling the store that you’re going to visit on yelp or any other website that can show the store’s exterior and interior. i always do this to get a realistic idea of the store’s layout based on where the register is in the pictures. don’t forget to go on their website and scout some clothing you might like! though, there is no option to check what is inside the store and isnt, it’s good to have a general idea of what you want in terms of basics, outerwear, bottoms, etc etc. 
me and my friends also usually wear very basic bräñdÿ girl clothing like mom jeans, a cropped long sleeve top, oversized sweater, and converse. since these bräñdÿ’s are located in wealthier areas, i try to look a bit more upperclass so they wouldn’t expect anything. we bring dark-colored tote bags (thank god for this trend) or one of us brings a kanken since mostly teenage girls are in/work there and we dont look suspicious. we also save large shopping bags from common clothing stores such as uniqlo, urban outfitters, zara, etc. and hold one bag each with a sweater or two inside (depending on the size) to make it appear as if we’ve bought a lot of clothing and that we have money to spend inside of the store (jokes on them, we never do AHAHAHA). kankens are very very useful since theyre small and no one really expects anyone to steal with it but trust me, it can hold A LOT.
next, what we’re usually all worried about - TAGS:
don’t worry about them in this store! there is NO security tags on any of the brandy melville clothing. (most likely because they are placed in more wealthier areas/malls)  usually, they are just casually hung up by a wire wrapped in fabric or folded and placed on benches. i live in the US and i have never seen any kind of security tag ranging from the pencil kind to the more rounded ones. 
now, who to watch out for:
CONFIDENCE IS KEY! don’t be nervous love! it’s usually a bunch of scrawny girls that work there anyways and from what i’ve seen, they do not have an LP and they very rarely have security guards. an LP is a higher up representative from the company that comes in to watch the tapes but they very rarely come by. the only thing to be aware of is the WORKERS. they are often dressed in regular plain clothing and blend in with other customers around you. when you walk in, it is only easy to distinguish the people working the register. i say to spend 5 minutes, browsing and picking up/putting back items to get a feel for the place and to see who are workers and who’s not. often, they go around to fix and fold varying items or they’re restocking different areas. customers and workers can be easily confused so i recommend staying on your toes and being self-aware. this is where a lookout is most useful and why i highly suggest bringing a friend just to keep an eye on anyone that may be passing by.
and for the BEST part - how to actually lift:
due to the size of the store, me and my friends have distinguished a language of common things to say in code. for instance, i might say, “can you reach that tank top for me?” which basically translates to: “i’m going to put this in my bag, keep a lookout.” we always, always, ALWAYS make sure to go into a blindspot because it is so hard to find the cameras unless they are placed directly on the wall (honestly, thank god for the pandemic because these masks are SUCH lifesavers since they cover your face). anyways, since the tops are flimsy it is *very easy to stuff it in your regular lifting bag. if it is your first time, i reccomend getting any and all tops. i usually just put some in my extra shopping bag quickly and pile up on them. i also carry my kanken with only one arm and leave the zipper a bit open for my friends to easily slip in anything they want inside. i am about 5′4 and both of my friends are 5′6 - 5′7 so usually one person stands in front of me and one is behind me so then the person in front can reach for anything i might like, take it off the hanger and pass it to my friend behind me to place in my bag. it can also work with two people where the person holding the kanken passes each top to their friend behind them. but for the 3 people, i hope this poorly drawn diagram explains it a bit better LMFAOOO
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for sweaters, since they are thicker, i mostly use a large zara shopping bag and place it under an actual zara puffer i got previously (but honestly any sweater from any store would work as a cover for it too, i’m just a very paranoid person and scared they might check my bag LMAO). moving the clothes around would be loud but they always play music in the store and those working are always doing something else. last but not least, for pants, this is when i like to use my kanken since they are larger than both a sweater and a tank it’s riskier. i usually  hold them up to my waist, see if they might fit, and then i pretend to set it down when really i’m folding it to make it smaller. after, it is folded or rolled up very tightly, my friend becomes a lookout and i open the zipper to my kanken “looking for my wallet” and then i just stuff it in really quickly. before exiting the store, make sure you have no sleeves stinking out of ANY of your bags because there is almost always someone waiting at the door counting those coming in and out because of covid. remember to act CASUAL! if you act nervous, it will most definitely show to the workers. me and my friends are usually in there for about 15 - 30 minutes which is kind of a long time so one of us actually buys something cheap and simple as an explanation while the others leave and wait somewhere else. 
and i think that is it AHAHA. if you have any questions or if i missed anything, be sure to pm me, i am more than happy to help !! remember: act casual! dont conceal on camera / BLINDSPOTS ARE YOUR BESTFRIEND! trust your gut and dont get greedy with items! i know everything in there is cute but it’s always good to not overdo it for the sake of both yourself and your safety! 
here’s something for all the new babylifters too:
the paranoia gets better over time! use all the information on liftblr at your disposal and learn from experience and new knowledge! remember that whatever corporation you are lifting from, it is from a company that rakes in millions upon millions of dollars exploiting workers for a shirt that only takes 6 cents to make but is being sold for $26. the toxic capitalist system is justification enough and i promise that the workers and the company itself are BARELY affected by lifting. taking $200 worth of clothes or even $16, it is merely pocket change to these corporations. so, always stay safe and good luck loves !!!
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tastyykpop · 4 years
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𝐶𝑟𝑎𝑧𝑦 𝑖𝑛 𝐿𝑜𝑣𝑒-Part 1
Pairings: yandere mafia leader!baekhyun x reader
Genre: suggestive, smut in later chapters, angst probs, fluff here and there but its very lowkey
《teaser next》
Warnings: kidnapping, drug use, alcohol consumption, baeks kinda crazy, pet names, master kink, spanking (he literally spanks her once), choking (not in a kinky way), mentions of blood and murder
Word count: 4.9k
Tag list: @wooya1224 @geniusloey tell me if you want to be tagged!!
⚠️ this is purely fictional and not how I imagine baekhyun to actually act. If you feel like you're in a situation like this please run and report it. I do not support this behavior.
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How long has it been? 3 or 5 days? Maybe even a week. You didnt know nor did you care. But why would you? You've gave up caring ever since your boyfriend, Sungho was murdered right in front of you, but you couldn't even see who the murderer was which drove you insane.
Tears and blood stained your pretty skin that night, so much agony and rage ran through your veins. All you wanted to do was curl up into a ball and scream until you passed out. But its been days since you've gotten a proper good night's sleep and it was eating you away ever so slowly. Everytime you closed your eyes, you remembered that dreadful day, Sungho's screams, the terror on his beautiful face, his lifeless bloody body. What did he do to deserve death? Why did it have to be him?
"Y/n! Y/n, its been four days please come out of your room!" It was the familiar voice of your mother and her knocking that brought you back to reality. She was almost begging, she hasn't seen you since you locked yourself away that night so you couldnt blame her for being worried, but you were fine. "I'm coming in."
She pushed your door open to see you cuddling your blanket with no emotion on your face. You looked at her with barely any care and rolled over, facing away from her.
She sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, "You know y/n, we'll get to the bottom of this and have them put behind bars. It's gonna be ok-"
"No its not," you rasped from not using your voice in so long, "I dont even know what the murderer looked like, how can we put them behind bars!?" There was a small pause, she knew finding them wasnt likely which hurt you like hell, but she was still trying her best to comfort you.
"...At least come out of your room, everyone's worried." Your mother pleaded and though you really didnt want to move, you didnt want to upset or worry anyone any further so you got up.
With a smile, she did the same and led you downstairs to where you dad and sister were. They tensed when they saw you, but nonetheless smiled sadly, thanking the heavens you were okay.
"You look horrible..." your sister, Haeun, commented making you cringe. It wasnt like she was wrong, you spent four days not taking a shower and sitting in the same clothes so of course you looked bad, who wouldn't.
You excused yourself and went into the kitchen grabbing the first thing you saw, a bottle of vodka. Now it wasnt the best drink you could've had, but you decided to drink away your pain and suffering since you couldnt take the heart ache any longer.
"Shes doing it again." Your mother whispered but you heard her clear as day. "Shouldnt we stop her?"
"What for? She won't listen and she's traumatized. There's nothing much we could do right now." Your dad spoke with sadness watching as you took a quick swig from the substance.
Normally, you're not one to drink vodka but now it felt good, maybe too good. The more you drank it, the less pain you were in. It could last forever, you thought, but nothing lasts forever.
As you poured yourself another drink, you started wondering about Sungho again. If there were an afterlife, was he happy there? Would he be watching over you, making sure you were happy and healthy?If only it were that simple.
Though you and him were starting to drift off a bit, you still cared and loved him and now you're starting to take everything you guys went through for granted. Its what you get.
Standing up, you left the kitchen a bit dizzy from only drinking alcohol and having nothing else in your system and went back upstairs to take a shower. You decided after drinking, you wanted to go to the club you always go to. Normally, you didnt go on a Thursday, but you thought since you haven't been out in a while that it would be good to leave and breathe in the fresh air.
You took a fairly quick shower and your hair and makeup didnt take long either. Finally stopping to look at yourself in the mirror, your saw how pale and tired you were. Almost lifeless. You figured that once you finally have a good time, it would all go away and you'd be happy again.
"Where are you going?" You jumped at the voice of Haeun who appeared out of nowhere.
"To the club." You stated nonchalantly,
Haeun frowned, "Thats not a good idea, all you'll do is drink until you pass out. And there's always weirdos waiting for their turn with someone vulnerable like that."
A smile formed on your face trying to lighten up the mood a bit, "Ill be fine. I promise nothing bad will happen."
Haeun sighed, almost sounding like a bratty child who didn't get their way because she knew she wouldn't change your mind no matter how hard she tried. It sucked to have a stubborn sibling like yourself.
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Sehun rolled his eyes at the sight of Baekhyuns scheduled flirting session. The girl was dressed in barely anything and he could tell she was probably Baekhyuns new toy for the night as he started getting handsy with her. But Sehun could see how Baekhyuns eyes weren't always looking at her. Instead, they sometimes searched passed the girl in hopes to find something else. He knew what, actually who he was searching for so he never asked or mentioned it.
He remembered you perfectly. Your calm and sleeping figure laying peacefully on your boyfriends chest. It was a shame he had to wake you up while he killed the man. And it was a shame to see such a pretty girl cry and scream with such fright in her eyes.
But Sehun didn't feel that bad, he did what he was supposed to do with only a little remorse.
"Sehun," Baekhyun called, the younger lifted his head waiting for him to continue, "Are you sure you didn't hurt my little toy the other day?"
Sehun scoffed, "If I did, I'd be dead by now, hyung."
The man chuckled sadistically , "She hasn't been here in a while," Baekhyun looked up from the girl and turned to Sehun, "Its only safe to ask."
"Hyung, I told you before that shes probably scared." Sehun face palmed when Baekhyun glared at him.
"A little red shouldnt effect someone that bad."
"I kil-" Sehun stopped what he was about to say, forgetting about the girl straddling Baekhyuns lap and cleared his throat, "Shes not used to stuff like that, Baek."
He didn't care about what Sehun said and ignored the youngests pointless blabbering, returning his attention back the girl only for a short amount of time until something caught his attention.
You walked in his club with confidence and beauty not giving any staring man the time of day and took your usual seat at the bar. After ordering your drink, you put your head in your arms and Baekhyun grinned.
Now was his chance, there's no way anyone will get in his way and there was no way he'd let this chance go.
"Stay here." Baekhyun said to Sehun, pushing the girl off him as he stood up. She almost pulled him back but he gave her such a terrifying death glare that made her stop.
"Theres no way youre actually gonna go talk to her...right?" Sehun questioned a bit shocked that Baekhyun was actually going to you after so long.
"Of course I am, I'll be back." With that, Baekhyun walked away from the two with only one thing on his mind: you.
He waltzed with a smirk of pure evil. What would he do? Only God knew, but he couldnt help himself when he saw your pretty face.
All eyes watched Baekhyun stop next to you, astonished that he went to talk to a girl and not the other way around, "Excuse me sweetheart," You popped your head up in the direction Baekhyun spoke, he took a seat next to you with an almost comforting smile when he saw your red cheeks, "But are you okay."
You wanted to spill everything that happened so bad because you needed to get it out, but you didnt know the man and neither did he know you so all you could do was nod, "Im fine."
Baekhyun knew behind your lying eyes was someone in pain and searching for a person to hold, but he couldnt do anything just yet and tried loosening you up to him so he could do what he wanted to do in the first place.
"C'mon sweetheart, you can tell me anything." He smiled that charismatic smile of his, "I'm easy to talk to."
It was believable for the most part and you laughed a bit, the first laugh you actually had since that tragic night, "You seem like a sweet talker," you smirked causing Baekhyun to chuckle, "Whats the catch?"
"There is no catch, I just wanted to know if youre okay. And besides, I could tell you've been crying." He pointed to your tear stained cheeks and you mentally cursed yourself for unintentionally crying just a few moments ago.
"Oh.."
"Dont worry," He chuckled, "Whatever it is im sure you'll get over it." Baekhyun almost failed to hide his sinful smug as you frowned and covered it quickly with a swig of your drink.
But something inside was eating you away about what happened, you needed to let out your emotions and you started caring less and less that he was a stranger. Then again, what if you scared him away? What will happen next?
"At least tell me your name first," You blushed and shyly looked over at him who had an expecting glint in his eyes, "Then maybe ill tell you why I'm so upset."
Baekhyun stretched his hand out in front of him and you gently shook it. Damn he had a strong grip, "My names Byun Baekhyun and you?" He asked as if he didnt know who you were.
"Y/n L/n." You beamed, wondering why his name was so familiar. "So uh- my story..." Fumbling with the drink in your hands, you sighed heavily, "Long story short, my boyfriend was...murdered in front of me." You mumbled the last bit, but you didnt need to repeat yourself as Baekhyun already knew every single detail of that night thanks to Sehun.
Placing a soft hand on your shoulder he whispered with fake sympathy, "I understand now why you're so upset," Liar, "I feel terrible," No he doesn't.
He wiped a stray tear that had slipped down your cheeks and sent you a solemn look.
"I-its in the past i guess." You muttered, "I can't change a thing about it."
Damn right you couldnt. Even if there were some form of time travel, Baekhyun wouldn't dare let you try and change the past because that would mean you weren't entirely his. But since there isn't anything like that, Baekhyun has nothing to worry about except figuring out how to bring you back with him.
"Would you like a glass of water, y/n?" Baekhyun asked quickly as a thought popped into his head. You nodded your head slowly and Baekhyun called over the bartender. You werent really paying attention to him ordering the water and just let your mind slip to the sound of the music and looked around the room, tapping your fingers to the beat, but you stopped when you felt a pair of sharp eyes watching you from somewhere. You looked here and there before stopping on a man that was a about a few inches taller than Baekhyun. He had a eerie grin on his face when you noticed him, then he winked.
Chills went down your spine and you spun yourself around in your chair facing forwards causing Baekhyun to raise an eyebrow but he didnt question it.
"Heres the water." He handed the drink over and you thanked him before taking a sip. It tasted a bit weird but not all water tasted the same, though it was slightly dry for water.
"So tell me about yourself, y/n." Baekhyun checked his watch, all he needed was fifteen minutes then you were all his. "You seem like an interesting person." He looked up and smiled.
"Well," You thought about what was possibly interesting enough to tell him, "Im in my second year of college!" A smile crossed your lips.
"Oh really? Where do you go?" Baekhyun did seem interested to know some parts of your life. Somehow, you caught his attention like that. Thats why Sehun was a surprised when he finally made his move with you.
"Seoul of Performing Arts." You beamed. It was the happiest moment in your life when you got accepted and all of your family members, extended and close, celebrated your acceptance, "My boyfriend, Sungho, went there too."
He just about rolled his eyes but replaced it with a nod and a fake warm smile. If you knew him better, you'd know that smile was only him clenching his jaw in anger.
"How cute." The glint in his eyes proved he was lying and maybe you were too stupid or innocent to notice when you took another sip of water.
He watched and wished his plan could go faster, he was excited to have fun with his pretty little toy and he couldnt wait any longer.
"What about you?" You raised a brow. There was still something in your gut that made you feel like you knew him. And you still wondered why. Was he someone famous in the city? Maybe you've heard your friends mention him here and there? What was it about him that was so familiar?
"You'll know soon enough kitten." You frowned at the pet name as he pat your head like you were a small child yet you chose to ignore it.
It was a bit outlandish and made you more skeptical to know who he was.
"Thats not very reassuring, Baekhyun." Your quirked.
"Why tell you when I can just show you?" He leaned in, mocking your now pouty lips and chuckled, "The drugs should be setting in by now."
You lifted your head up with wide eyes, "Wait what?" Did you hear him right? Did he say what you thought he said? "What do you mean drugs!?" You said with awestruck as your heart raced in fear. You hoped to god he was just joking
The man before you smirked that unpleasant smirk of his, almost like the guy you saw before and you started panicking more, knowing he wasn't kidding. You tried to get up and run but you felt so woozy in a matter of seconds. Not to mention the sudden pain in your stomach that made you want to throw up. What was Baekhyuns plan? Why did he do this!? You thought at least one thing could go right tonight and maybe you could have fun, but you were wrong. So so wrong.
Trying to leave the club building, you knew you wouldn't make it but you still wanted to attempt an escape. It didn't have to be like this. Each step made it harder to move and your eyes started drooping. It was too late for you.
Already collapsed on the ground, people gasped and stared at your almost lifeless body as Baekhyun tilted his head to the side, "She tried, ill give her that." He walked over and crouched down next to you, moving the hair out of your pale face, "But not hard enough."
In an instant, your body was thrown over the man's shoulder. No one commented on anything that happened in fear that they could be next. It was impossible to say that they felt bad either, they were just glad it didn't happen to themselves.
"Sehun," He called out to the younger male but Sehun was already ahead of him, "You drive." He tossed him the keys.
With a nod they both walked out, you on Baekyuns shoulder as he took you to the expensive car. Gently, he placed you down in backseat, putting your seatbelt on for you, and climbed in on the other side to sit next to you.
"All this just for a girl." Sehun shook his head but needless to say he still smirked, "Youre loosing yourself, hyung." The car sparked and drove off into the night, no cops came searching. They knew better. And neither was there news of your kidnapping, the city stayed quiet.
Sure once your parents realized you were gone they'd start freaking out, but would they dare mess with Baekhyun? Would anyone actually try to mess with him? The mafia could easily answer that with an optimistic no. Remember, Baekhyun had power. No one is going to stop him.
"How long will she be out for?" Sehun asked.
Baekhyun shrugged, "Like an hour or two." He was excited for your life with him now, he knew you were finally his after a year of watching you come and go in his club, plus the small stalking he did when he wanted to see you, and he could only smile. No one can get in between him and your love anymore. "Shes gonna love it when she gets home!"
Sehun chuckled at Baekhyuns almost child like enthusiam and started, "She seems a bit innocent," he paused, looking back at your passed out body in the mirror before returning back to the road, "Normally women don't look off into space when someone's buying them a drink."
"Maybe she's a bit slow, but she wouldn't be here with me if that didn't happen."
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The candle flickered in the dark as you awoke on a strange bed. You're head was pounding a bit as you tried looking around at your unfamiliar surroundings. What happened? Was your first thought and you started questioning where you were too. You knew something wasn't right but you couldn't understand why.
You tried getting up only to be locked in place by restraints on your wrists. They were only silk but they were tied tight enough to keep you still. Tilting your head in confusion, you heard foot steps coming towards the door and stopping for a mere few seconds before the door handle twisted.
You anticipated what was going to happen, you didnt even know what was going on in the first place, but you remembered the man standing in front of you.
"B-Baekhyun..?"
"Hey, kitten." That sinister smile was plastered on his face. You were sure it held more meanings then just one.
"Where a-am i?"
He almost cooed at your curiosity but composed himself, "At my mansion, where you'll be staying from now on."
There was a moment where you had to think, interestingly enough what Baekhyun said didnt even frighten you in the slightest, but then again you were high off the drug.
"C-Can you u-untie my hands please?" Your voice was soft and quiet, Baekhyun noticed you werent fully aware of your surroundings and complied, untying the silk from your wrists.
Your eyes were a little dilated when you looked at him. He was gorgeous, you had to give him that, though you wanted to remember why something wasn't sitting right with him. "Baekhyun?"
He looked up with a hum.
"Who...are y-you to me?" You squinted your eyes at the man who sat on the bed next to you, drawing small shapes on your thigh in a sort of loving manner.
"Your boyfriend, y/n."
Boyfriend? You have a boyfriend?
"I have a boyfriend..?" You muttered and asked more to yourself than to him, but he snickered, knowing way more than you did.
"Kitten you drank too much, go back to sleep." He lied and pushed your shoulders down so you were flat against the mattress.
"I-i did?" You whined when Baekhyun kissed your cheek. He always wanted to kiss more than your cheek, he couldnt bring himself to do that unless you were fully conscious for him.
"Yes baby girl, so get some sleep."
You grumbled, "I-Im not t-tired."
Baekhyun sighed, "Then what would the pretty girl like to do?"
You perked up on the mattress and grinned, "Im hungry!"
"Youre hungry?" Baekhyun repeated with a smile at your small childlike energy and you nodded back, "I can ask someone to make you something if you'd like."
"Please!"
He stood up, waiting for you to do the same but since you weren't very awake, you stumbled a bit.
Baekhyun settled with carrying you to the mansions kitchen, awing at your cuteness the whole time. It was a bit of a walk but luckily you were light.
Sitting you down, Baekhyun walked off, finding someone to cook for you. In your state, you felt a bit lonely, only knowing Baekhyun and not your surroundings, it made you feel a bit lost. It shocked you too how you didnt remember Baekhyun being your boyfriend, you started question the relationship between the two of you more.
"Princess i got you your favorite dish!" He walked in with a plate of jjajangmyeon and set it down in front of you.
Your mouth was watering and you were ready to dig in before wondering, "H-How do you know m-my favorite dish?"
Baekhyun hesitated at the question before clearing his throat and spoke with a raised brow, "We're dating y/n, why wouldn't I know what you like?"
"Uh yeah..right...." you dug in, your mind was starting to clear up a bit, not enough for you to fully remember anything though. But the more you thought, the more consciousness you regained.
Baekhyun watched as you gobbled down the meal with full satisfaction. This wouldn't be the first time he's watched you and neither would it be the last. He liked knowing you were eating well and were healthy so he was proud.
"I-im done!"
"Good girl. Now wait for me to come back so we can go to bed, okay?" You nodded and sat patiently as he took your plate and waited for your boyfriend to come back.
A few moments later, Baekhyun still was no where to be seen and your mind was slowly coming back, "N-no...wait." mumbling to yourself, you figured it out in just mere seconds and remembered that your boyfriend was brutally murdered four days ago in front of you. After four days you went to the bar to drink away the anguish and met someone, that someone was Byun Baekhyun. After thirty or so minutes of talking to him, you were drugged when you werent paying attention and passed out minutes later. Now you were here at Baekhyuns mansion, lied to and kidnapped. "Oh fuck."
The chair scraped against the floor and you wasted no time running to your hopeful freedom.
But you weren't a lucky person. Oh no you weren't. You were tossed and pushed against the door you were about to open by someone much bigger. He was the same guy you saw at the bar and his smirk was nothing different. Cynical and frightening.
The man stepped closer to you before putting one hand next to your head and whispered, "Are you playing a cat and mouse game with hyung now? How cute." Standing tall, he grabbed you by the hair and dragged you back to where you came. You groaned and tried fighting back, but there was no use, he wasn't going to let go until after he practically threw you into Baekhyuns arms.
You were about to scream at Baekhyun and the no name man until Baekhyun covered your mouth with his hand, "Say something and you'll regret it." He growled into your ear as you shook and fought.
You hummed against him and tried biting his hand and punching his side, but he was like a man of steel and let it happen, only raising his brow like he wanted to hurt you, but didnt.
"Sehun, tell Chanyeol to lock all the doors for the next week or so 'til she learns how to behave."
The man nodded and ran off leaving you two alone. Fear was one way to describe it and the look Baekhyun gave you didnt help.
"Now kitten why would you go and do some shit like that? Are you asking to be punished?" He took his hand off your mouth to let you speak. Baekhyuns aura was much different than earlier. The nice guy was gone and you were left with a man who could kill you with just one look.
You stopped hitting him and screamed viciously, "Fuck you! You're fucking insane!"
"Now now princess," he pressed a hand to your throat, wrapping it tighter and tighter until you felt the oxygen leave your lungs, "It seems as if you're asking for a punishment."
"I-if you...s-so dare to-touch..any other p-part of my body, i-ill....kill you..." You whimpered, grabbing his wrist in attempts to pull him off but Baekhyun was relentless, keeping his grasp tight and painful.
"Stop struggling, you're only making this harder for yourself."
There were two options now, either listen to Baekhyun or fight until you passed out again.
"Princess." His voice held a warning tone and you hesitantly stopped and moments later he loosened his grip, you knew there would be marks by tomorrow, "We are going to bed now. Don't try to run, I have this place guarded up and if you do somehow make it out, be prepared because I will find you and beat your ass until you can't sit for a month. Understand?"
Your stomach did flips and not in a good way, you were scared, "Y-yes."
"Can you say 'yes master'?" His voice went higher as he said the last part to mimic yours.
You sighed, positive if you didnt comply then you'd be here all night, "Yes m-master..."
"Good girl." He kissed your cheek and you almost smacked him in disgust but tried not to act aggressive towards him. You wanted to leave, not be punished by whatever he had in mind. "Call me that from now on."
Baekhyun grabbed your hand and led you to the room you were just in, now that you took a good look, it was a pretty room. There was a red sofa against the wall and some other matching chairs plus a huge flat screen TV hanging on the wall facing the bed. You had to admit, he had good taste but he was still insane.
As you sat down on the bed, Baekhyun reached into his draw to pull out a t-shirt and handed it to you with a wide smile, but you raised a brow at the fabric.
"No pants?" You asked.
Baekhyun chuckled, "What for?"
"Because of creeps like you." You grumbled and snatched the shirt that dangled in front of your face before storming off into the connected bathroom. Inside, you could hear Baekhyuns annoying laugh and ignored it, changing into the surprisingly very oversized shirt that went down to your mid thigh.
Taking the clothes you wore earlier, you went back into the room where Baekhyun laid peacefully on the bed, waiting for you.
He only had his boxers on which made you groan in anger and decided to not lay on the bed and instead on the couch near it.
"Princess, what are you doing?" He perched himself on his elbows, watching you throw your clothes on the ground then take the folded blanket on the couch and wrap yourself with it as you laid down.
"Going to sleep, master." You stated coldly with a glare.
Baekhyun rolled his eyes, "Get over here." He said, voice low and laced with dominance but you remained still, closing your eyes and pretending as if you were asleep. "Y/n." He warned but there was no reply.
"Thats it." You heard him get up and march to where you laid. Baekhyun picked you up and you yelped at the sudden intrusion and were thrown over his shoulder.
Smacking his back got you nowhere as he threw you down on the bed, pinning both your hands down and hovered over you with a killing look, "Next time you don't listen, ill bend you over my knee."
"Youre all talk, no action." In an instant you were flipped over and a hand landed straight on your bare ass, leaving you shocked and mouth agape.
"Are you sure, kitten? Would you like me to spank you again?"
"N-no."
"No what?"
"N-no master.."
Baekhyun slowly let you go and laid beside you, still a bit irrated. "Now go to sleep."
You couldnt. Not with the lingering fear of what could happen next. Plus, not with his arm wrapped around your waist with a somewhat tight hold. You were just too scared to let your gaurd down. Why shouldn't you be scared though? What if he took advantage of your sleeping body and did something terrible.
There was no way you could get rest now. You could now count this as your fifth day without proper sleep.
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queerautism · 2 years
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(before reading i would like to say i accidentally talked too much and it accidentally became possibly a vent??? no matter what u get a cookie for 0 reason but bc i said so. if u want to u can just delete the ask and not even look at it or whatever. i would prefer if you didnt post this ask itself and if u respond to it do it in a separate post. Edit later: I was going to ask a question relating to all this but I forgot it and honestly im not going to just delete all of this which is a lot. my stance on the “dont post this” has changed and it would be ok just add any tags u think are needed??)
sorry about this really long message /gen i just never talk to anyone about this and got a little too deep into talking about it all.
no clue if this can be answered but i have NO clue who to talk about this to (if you know anyone who could answer this better please direct me to them!!). back when i was younger, i had an emotional attachment to my (not legally back then) adopted siblings. they were related to me by blood, as cousins and their mom had just given them to us randomly and we decided to take them in. i loved them so much. and she took them away from us, just to put them up in another home and another and eventually they ended up in the foster care system and she went to jail.
now, i was in an awful state during this time where they weren’t with me. before then, my mental health had been pretty good, no meltdowns/tantrums/etc and anger issues weren’t a problem. but when they were taken, i got worse and worse pretty fast. Everything started going downhill and I would always be getting in trouble at school, at least one problem every week if not more. This was around maybe second or third grade? Not sure.
Started getting attached to books and minecraft youtubers to try and help this all out, but all that happened was just an obsession for the rest of my life and nothing else. All my anxiety & stress and whatever else were a cause of this experience but I never even think about this anymore and it doesn’t make me feel much looking back (besides misery and wanting to cry about something that isnt even a problem anymore), i just wish i could tell my past self they would come back.
They’re back with us and have been legally adopted for maybe 2 years now? I don’t remember. My anger issues are getting easier to handle, but I still snap at people sometimes and some people have assumed I have BPD, which I’m pretty sure I don’t have. Even my cousin thinks I have BPD.
During this time, I had been in a girl scouts group that my mom made and everyone in the group had left us because I was (and i quote, paraphrased but i remember this well) “weird and different” and because of my anger issues. Which back then, I had no diagnosis’s for anything and now looking back it’s an even worse memory since turns out I’m ND. Oh and I also sleep deprived myself when my siblings were gone and now i have insomniiiaaa
again sorry for the really long ask, have a good day and I dont know how to end this since I accidentally just vented to someone who doesnt even know me sorry :(
It's really okay. There's nothing weird about you. You were in a shitty situation where you had no control, and changes like this during formative years can have a big effect. It can absolutely be traumatic.
I'd say it might be a good idea to look into emotional regulation issues, and maybe CPTSD, which has a lot of traits in common with BPD. You might want to look at DBT therapy, there's workbooks you can do yourself and I've found them really helpful
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pigstepmp3-moved · 4 years
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holy hell, gamers, i finally reached one whole thousand followers! how bonkers is that! when i first made this blog in december 2018, i was just trying to start over in a new fandom. ive been active on tumblr for a looong time (since i was like 11, which is. not great, but we wont get into that). i cant remember quite why i decided to remake, but i never imagined getting a higher following than i did before, but i did! 1000 followers is bonkers, i’ve never had a thousand of anything! i seriously cant thank each and every one of you enough, whether you followed me for 911 or for mcyt or for whatever!
now, since ive reached this absolutely bonkers milestone, im feeling particularly sappy! so under the cut, i have some friends and mutuals tagged who are super great n who are always an absolute pleasure to see on my dash! <3 again, thank you all so much! (ps, if we’re mutuals and i didnt tag u in this, that doesnt mean i dont love and appreciate you!! i mostly am just picking people to tag based off how often i see them on my dash! i love all of u so much <3)
♡ 911 FRIENDS ♡
(aka the ogs, aka the fire fam)
♡ @lovelessmotel ♡ emily!! god, where do i even begin with how much i love and adore you!! i know youre one of my big sisters, but wow i am so proud of how much youve discovered yourself since we’ve met!! like wow, look at this epic, gorgeous person whos one of MY close friends! im so lucky to be friends with you! thank you so much for being my friend, i appreciate you and all the sisterly advice you’ve given me more than i can ever put into words!
♡ @eddiediaz-buckley ♡ sav!! mom!! i love u so unbelievably much!! i am so unbelievably grateful for you and everything youve done for me! all the advice youve given me and all the times youve let me vent to you have been so important to me and i cannot thank you enough for all that. im soso appreciative of you and im so glad that i have someone as amazing as you as my mom/big sister (we’ll never really figure out our fams family dynamics, will we?) (ps, whenever i go outside and have my keys with me, its always so comforting to feel the keychain you got me! its like my moms with me everywhere i go!)
♡ @liesoverthec ♡ bonbonbonbon!!! i love you so much, you wouldnt BELIEVE how much i love you!!! im so glad we met bc you are so unbelievably kind!! there is a very good reason a nickname for u is bonbon bc you are just as sweet as candy!! maybe even more so!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, you give such wonderful advice and talking to you always makes me feel a million times better!! i love you and i am soso glad i get to call you my friend!
♡ @marauder-girl ♡ sabsabsab!! i love u so much, u funky lil future lawyer!! im so proud of u and i can hardly believe ur gonna be my Lawyer big sister!!! thats so awesome!! i cant believe such a rad person is one of MY friends!! how lucky am i!! i love having you as one of my big sisters, youre so kind and funny and talented and your advice has always been so helpful to me too! thank you so much for being my friend and for always being there for me!!
♡ @nighting-gale17 ♡ cait, my love, my wifey!!! wowowow i love u so much!!! im so glad we’re friends, you are so unbelievably lovely!! youre also so unbelievably talented like??? hey queen wanna hand some of ur writing ability over to the unfortunate (like me). i’m so glad we’re friends, youre so sweet and even tho we dont talk as much as we used to, i still have SO much love for you in my heart
♡ @africaneuropean ♡ rae, my father!! i love u so much!! i know we havent talked at all in. who knows how long. but i still have so much love for u in my heart!! you are so iconic and cool and funny, im so glad i met you n became friends with you!! ur one of the coolest people i know, i hope i can be as cool and mysterious and wonderful as you one day
♡ @evaneddie ♡ DHYL!!! dhyl pickle i love u so much!!! whenever u pop into my inbox with random nice messages, every part of me lights up!!! u are so kind to me and for what!! i miss talking to u as much as we used to, you are so sweet and you are such a good friend!! i love u n im SO proud of how far youve come with gif making, i still remember when u first started n youve gotten SO amazing at gifs lately!! i love u soso much n im so glad we’re friends, youre so awesome!!!
♡ @basil-the-writer ♡ des!!! i love u so much!!! i know we’ve never rly talked all that much but im glad we have interacted in the ways that we have!! u are so sweet n so talented!! like the fact that u have the patience for those lil video edits u do?? that is so cool!! all ur edits are so cool, i cannot imagine being able to make stuff like that without dying every single time. u are so cool n i love being able to call u my friend!!
♡ GRIFF ♡
(aka griff)
♡ @yawnralphio ♡ u get ur own section bc u are my only 911 friend who isnt an og, but thats ok bc u are so swaggy!! i love being friends with u griff, u are so cool and funny and i am so glad that u still want to be friends with me despite all of the horrifying things u’ve learned about mcyt from me jdhfajkdhfa. i love u so much n i am so excited to get to know u more n get closer to u!!
♡ FRUITBLR ♡
(aka mcyt friends)
♡ @fear-epidemic ♡ atlas u are so swaggy and funny!! tumblr funny man!! im so glad we’re mutuals, i love u a whole lot. that one time u me n wilby played bed wars together was so fun even if we’re really bad! n that one time we played on the fruitblr server while on vc was so fun, i loved talking to u n playing with u so much, we gotta do that again sometime. i love u so much chapin n im so glad we’re friends!!
♡ @netheritedream ♡ hari my beloved... i love u so much. like literally so much that its really embarassing. i am so glad u tagged me in that one follow forever post n put the offer on the table to let me join the server. i love being ur dumb lil husband!!! jus like actual fundy, i would risk it all to watch treasure planet with u. i love u sososo much, i wish i could live closer to u so i could actually talk to u more often </333 im going through severe withdrawal, pray for me. im gonna stop talking for now bc if i kept going on, this post would be several miles along n nobody has time for that </3 just know that i love u so much and i love having matching icons n i love being ur husband, i love u so much
♡ @sootswilbur ♡ tommy... i care you so much. little bromther!!! im sososo glad we’re friends bc u are so kind to me all the time n u are so easy to talk to!! ur also so talented, ur writing n ur gifs are so amazing n im so proud of all the awesome stuff u make!! seeing u experiment more with ur gif sets n trying new things is so awesome n inspiring and i love seeing ur experiments work out!! i love u soso much n im so happy to be ur big brother!! (or one of them at least)
♡ @fruitbur ♡ virgil my Other beloved... i love u so much!! u are one of the kindest people ive ever met n im so glad i met u!! i know ive already told u this before but ur tagging system is so sweet n i love seeing u reblog my posts bc im like “yay alastair is gonna tell me that he loves me in the tags :D” i also lovelovelove ur theme, i love the soft pink and the lil aesthetic board that u have pinned, its so nice to look at!!! ily sososo much <333
♡ @theartofmining ♡ hey fruit ily. like genuinely, u are so unbelievably funny that u make my ribs hurt so much. i know we’re like never rly that serious but i love u so much. as much as i joke about hating u, i really am glad we’re friends n i really look forward to becoming better friends with u. i love u a whole lot rain, i love seeing u on my dash bc ur full of good takes n funny posts
♡ @sapnaplive ♡ dream.... bonks our foreheads together... i care u so much. my other half!!! i love u with my whole little heart. u are soso cool and im so lucky to be able to call u my friend!! ur themes are always so cool, i wish i could be half as cool as them!!! ur art is also so epic like??? u are a triple threat: good at art, tumblr themes, AND minecraft building. and ur also so kind!!! u are one of the sweetest people i know, i love u so much and im so glad im friends with u!!
♡ @dreams-little-kitten ♡ corn u are so weird and i mean that in the kindest way possible. u are so cryptic n i love that so much about u. ur like the wilbur to my philza sometimes and i think thats so awesome. that one time u came into my inbox to talk shit about that one cuphead boss was so funny and absurd, i loved that so much. i love You so much. i love how ur just so effortlessly funny, n im so glad i can be friends with u
♡ @dreamsmp ♡  JEL!!!! i love u so much holy cow. u are so sweet!! all the time!!! ur also so talented, ur gifs always look so good!!! i love being friends with u, ur always so nice to me n u always leave rly nice tags when u reblog my gif sets that make me so happy!!! i think about that one time u rbed my fundy gif set n said “FUNDY GIFS” and “GIFS BY FUNDY” it made me so happy!!! i love u a whole lot, im so glad we’re friends :)
♡ @leaguelol ♡ damien!! i love u so much u funky little cryptid!! i love when u pop into the gc just to share cryptic thoughts, u are so strange but i think thats so cool of u!!! i honestly see u kinda like a lil sibling, im always so proud of u when i see ur art on my dash!! u are so talented at art!! i love u so much n i love being ur friend, ur rly sweet n i love seeing u on my dash and in the gc!!
♡ @its5undy ♡ idk why im putting u on this, ur my mortal enemy. jkjk, i actually love u a lot clay! i love joking around with u, ur so funny and for what. im so glad u joined the gc bc i love talking to you so much!! i still love that one time u reblogged that fwt gif set n tagged me in it moments after I reblogged it. i love that u thought about me, that rly warms my heart! i love being friends with u sososo much
♡ @cavalreee ♡ oh hey, another great big fruit!! i dont think we talk all that often, which is a shame, bc ur so sweet!! and also so fucking funny, why is everyone in this friend group so fucking funny, its not fair. i love seeing u on my dash talking with ur other friends, u always have the funniest convos ever. also? ur desktop theme is SO epic, it threw me off the first time i saw it but its so swaggy, just like u!! i love u soso much azzie, n i hope we can talk more in the future bc ur so cool
♡ @technosoot ♡ i love u even tho ur a br*t /j /j /j. jannat u are so unbelievably sweet. im so glad u joined the gc bc u are such a kind presence both in there and on my dash! u radiate very Warm, Friend energy. ur friend shaped. i love u so much n i love being friends with u!! im very eager to become closer friends with u bc u seem like a really amazing friend to have
♡ @sortasortaspicy ♡ les where are u in the gc i miss u </3 i love u so much, u fit in so well from the very beginning n brought so much more fun and laughter into the gc. i dont know u all that well n i dont think we’ve talked one on one like. at all. but id love to get closer to u bc ur so rad and ur so sweet!!
♡ EPIC PEOPLE  ♡
(aka mutuals who are so cool n id love to be friends with u pls talk to me)
@eurytherm ♡ @vampkings ♡ @weelbur ♡ @wilburtheesoot ♡ @quackityskarl ♡ @wimblrscoot ♡ @technofarmer ♡ @wooteena ♡ @bloodforblood ♡ @smpsapnap ♡ @literallynotfound ♡ @hearty-an0n ♡ @enderanboo ♡ @springbonniecpu ♡ @pandascanpvp ♡ @tommylnnits ♡ @strawberrygogy ♡ @timedeo ♡ @nymika-arts ♡ @h-isforhome ♡ @eboykarl ♡ @joe-alkaysani ♡ @betwecouldmakesome ♡ @squirrelstone ♡ @maddieandchimney
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Text
i need a plot for this
yall so ive been trying really hard to get back into writing and i went to a writing camp this summer. im going to post a poem that i wrote there later bc im super proud of it but right now i have something else i need help with. SO basically there was a prompt about someone finding a letter or a note. that’s the prompt. so i wrote something, really liked it BUT I HAVE NO IDEA WHERE TO TAKE IT FROM HERE. my basic ideas involve the two characters meeting each other again to do SOMETHING WHICH I DONT KNOW and slowly arcane (youll see when you read the story below) thaws and falls in love with kalon and kalon has always been in love with her and its like best friends to enemies to friends to lovers ya know? ANYWAY if you dont hate me for being inactive and needy, please read this and help me. 
Dear Arcane,
It’s been a while, hasn’t it? 10 years. Wow. I don’t even know if you’ll ever get this, you could’ve moved. You could be dead. Oh god, that’s dark. You’re not dead, someone would’ve told me, I’m sure. So that must mean that there’s a good chance you have this, but I’m not even sure if you’ll read it.
He was right, as he most often was. Arcane had not planned to read the letter from the moment she read her name on the envelope, written in a neat sort of messy handwriting that could only come from one person. The letter had been sitting at her desk for a week before memories began to drown her and she knew she had to open it.
That’s not the point though, I’m sure you’ll read this. You’ve always been a sucker for the intimacy of written letters. Maybe that’s why I wrote to you instead of calling.
Arcane closed her eyes, the pounding of the memories at the door slowly consuming her. She took a deep breath and let them in. The whispers started to fill the room, every word echoing off the walls, like her past had become a living, breathing thing in her room. How could he write her now? After all these years. Anger reared it's small head in the back of her mind. How could he be so casual as if he wasn't the boy who ripped her heart out and tore it to pieces. 
Maybe it’s because I did read all the letters you wrote to me. Even after the voicemails stopped filling my phone and the emails ran dry, your letters kept coming.
She remembers writing those letters, the pen shaking in her hand as it hit the paper. She remembers wondering what you said to someone like him, a friend who left you behind. The squeeze in her chest that tightened each time he didn’t reply. The break in her heart when the last letter she ever wrote was returned to her doorstep.
If you’ve read this far without tearing my letter to pieces, then I would say this is a good start to our reunion. I’ve missed you. Your stubborn ways, always trying to keep me safe. But you always came with me wherever I went anyway. I miss your secret smile, the one you saved just for me. The treehouse we built in your yard. Do you miss that? I wonder if you wonder about me. I wonder if I can even ask that of you.
She did miss them. But, those things that she missed were long gone. The treehouse was overgrown with vines, Arcane was sure you couldn’t even get into it anymore. She went with him on his stupid adventures because what would she do if he left and met new people? He would leave her and she would be alone. So she desperately followed him blindly, hoping it would keep him close. Arcane missed her secret smile, the genuine one she had always saved for him. He missed it. How could he miss something that he destroyed. With his one and only letter to her, he demolished any leftover love for him that hid in her heart. He couldn’t ask if Arcane wondered about him. That wasn’t fair. That night, ten years ago, was still a raw wound in her soul that she was pretty sure would never heal.
~
The rain was relentless that night, banging against every edge of the house, but a little girl was waiting by the door, not even flinching as the lightning and thunder clapped furiously. Arcane peeked her head above the window frame to find the mailman running through the storm, his frantic steps pounding through the floor of the house. Her eyes lit up with a hope that was slowly fading with each mail drop. She opened the door and hid the small smile that started to spread up her face with a cough.
“Hi, Dan!” Arcane’s voice gave away the excitement that was flooding her system.
“Hey, Arcane.” Dan couldn’t help the pitiful grin that he gave her. She waited by the door for him every day and each day there was no letter for her. It must be soul-crushing, he thought, waiting for a letter that never comes.
“Is there…?” Arcane was practically on her tiptoes at this point. Dan rifled through the letters, dread settling as her name wasn’t there. Again. And then there was a squeal. “Oh, Dan! I found it! I knew- I knew it- I told them!” Her sentences didn’t even come out fully as she beamed, her smile brighter than any ray of the sun.
Arcane had run into the house, a breeze following in her wake. Plopping down into the soft plush couch, she ripped open the envelope, not caring about the paper that flew everywhere in the room. A paper fluttered out, floating toward the ground. Arcane grabbed it, hands shaking, she could practically feel the sweat dripping down her face. Words were the easiest way to break someone. The letter only contained eleven words, yet they would stick with her for the rest of her life.
Stop writing me. None of it was real. You were nothing.
Eleven words. And they shattered her. Crumbling, shattering, a million pieces breaking. Sobs racked through her whole body, her chest shaking and trembling with each broken breath. She caught her face in the mirror hanging off the pale wall and didn’t recognize the girl that stared back. You were nothing. A scream tore through her, the ache of her heart so raw that even the sun seemed to cry, rain dripping onto the panes of the windows. And slowly, so very slowly, Arcane buried the ache and gathered the shattered pieces of her heart and encased them in an impenetrable cage, never to opened again.
~
The ache was still present now, ten years after the letter had arrived. The dullness of her buried hurt made her clench her fists around the letter that sat in her hand now, the same lopsided handwriting adorning it.
But, that’s not why I’m writing this letter. I’m writing this with an actual purpose, if you can imagine that. I didn't just write to rehash our friendship. 
Arcane could feel her eyes narrowing, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at the inanimate piece of paper. An actual purpose? To break her heart all over again? This time she did roll her eyes, even though no one was there to see it. But, it wasn’t the fact that he wrote her after all these years or that his tone was friendly throughout that made her body freeze. It was the last line that had the hairs on the back of her neck standing to attention.
In all the years that Arcane had known him, he'd never been very dependent. He often just struggled in silence and figured them out on his own. Not once, not ever, had has asked for help. But, there the sentence was inked in his slanted, loopy writing. 
I need your help.
Love,
Kalon
  ~~everything below here is stuff that doesnt have to be a part of the story but i still liked it and where it was going (idk please give me ideas)~~
The quiet, shock of the room seemed to weigh on Arcane. She flopped back onto her bed, the soft pillows cushioning her landing. I need your help. Those few, simple words, tugged at the strings that bound her heart. He needed her. The thought was fleeting as just as quickly as it came, it left. In its spot was anger. Now he needed her? After all those years when she needed him? What did he do then? Nothing. And that’s what she was going to do now. She huffed in satisfaction, tossing the envelope to the side. Her fingers reached into her hair, massaging her head. There were too many things to think about right now. Arcane squeezed her eyes shut as memories stung her eyes in the form of tears. 
~
“Please, don’t leave me.” Arcane had whispered, her small breaths filling the one room of the treehouse. 
“I don’t have a choice. You know I don’t want to go.” Kalon’s voice broke and he looked away so Arcane couldn’t see the tears in his eyes. It was silent. 
“We’ll still be best friends right?” 
“Yeah.” Kalon’s reply didn’t hold much conviction, causing Arcane to look over at him, confused, glossy eyes narrowing. 
“To the moon and back, Kal, remember?” She said, her tone desperate. It was a promise they made one night as they were watching some cheesy movie on the old television set. The boy had told the girl that he loved her too ‘the moon and back’. Kalon had then explained that the two characters said that so that they would never be apart. They could meet at the same moon, always and then they could go back. And then, they would never be fully apart. Arcane had liked that. So naturally,  she had grabbed Kal’s face and made him promise that they would go ‘to the moon and back’ if they were ever apart. It became a goodbye for them, a way of saying ‘I’ll see you soon’. 
“Yeah,” Kal had replied, a smile barely curling through his lips, “I’ll race ya there.”
~
She wasn’t sure how long she lay there, letting her memories flow down her cheeks and into the bedsheets, but eventually she had to get up. She pulled herself up and off the bed, limbs protesting at the use. She just needed a few days is all, then she wouldn’t even remember what she was crying for.  Kalon didn’t mean anything to her anymore.
thank you for reading this far, i love all of you. just throw out ideas please. or give me some advice, i would love that. whether its about my writing or the plot i would love to have tips and constructive criticism on how to get better! tagging some moots who i hope dont hate me after this below the cut:
@natashxromanovf @pad-foots @griffxnnage @voidmalfoy @flxss-bxbblxs @alwaysreading @herondalesunsetcurve THANKS YALL I LOVE YOU MORE THEN I EXPRESS AND I DO NOT, I REPEAT, DO NOT DESERVE ALL OF YOU AND YOUR LOVE
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albino-whumpee · 3 years
Text
Unrequited Love
CW// Pet whump, dehumanization, human trafficking, amnesia, hot water burns, exhausted whumpee. Pretty mild one honestly. ^^
Ok i didn´t notice it before, but THIS is the corrected version. Idk what happened.  Also taglist? I didn´t tag y´all???
Taglist:  @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @giggly-evil-puppy @cowboysrappin @haro-whumps @burtlederp @neuro-whump @comfortforthepain @whumps-the-word @whole-and-apart-and-between @broken-horn @ashintheairlikesnow @rosesareviolentlyread​ @starnight-whump @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi @as-a-matter-of-whump  @whumpasaurus101 @grizzlie70​ @twistedcaretaker
During the party, Zarai had gotten the contact she needed to talk to Dune’s Ceo. Or at least the first of three people she needed to stablish contact to get to Gil Jefferson.
So while she was hopping around searching for the phone number of her client, asking for extensions and generally being absent, the whole team needed her approval to finish their jobs. So Albus was the one in charge now.
“Albus, can you check this out and tell me if its ok, please? Was a question he heard at least ten times a day now.
“Serra, talk to management on the next floor and tell them we need the results now” he would nod and fly downstairs.
“Serra I need your sign for this budget…” Zarai had given her authority to do that after Robert’s visit.
“Serra I need your sign for this budget…” Zarai had given her authority to do that after Robert’s visit.
Any problem the marketing and development team had was managed by the albino with a few wretched nerves and increasing eye bags. Then he would inform an overly tired Zarai that everything was in order. But there was always a small mistake she would notice and make him fix in shouting everyone on the office was too surprised to never have seen Albus cry from.
Despite the shouting making it all the way to other side of the office, he simply remained calm, waited for her to finish and then apologized before going to fix it. He just continued to work efficiently. Until there were no mistakes to get yelled at.
Sometimes, one of the new trainees would ask him if he was alright, but he would look at them with a funny look and change the subject. If he was to be honest, he had fully expected to be properly punished when they were alone, at home. He was so grateful he could hang his role as Albus Serra for a moment and allow himself to be only Al, the pet who didn’t hide his collar.
He was bent over some newbie’s desk when he straigthened up with a smile “Now, you just need to click this button, and you will have the whole system on your drive in a few minutes”
The newbie looked at him with adoration “Thank you so much, mister Serra!” He had said with a gleam on his eyes that made him blush.
“Mister Serra, I’ve a few questions about the report I sent you” Albus trotted to the woman.
“Ah, yes. I checked and it’s looking fine. I already sent it so, dont worry about it and give a hand to Ryan, please” the woman blinked “I know it’s not part of your job but look at them…” he cocked his head to the glass covered office of five people laying over their desks, one fully crying and the other lost in infinity. “You’ve got a degree on computer engineering right? The development needs to find the exact problem today. Please lend them a hand”
“Yes, sir” she had answered before walking away. Albus froze for a moment. An strange feeling sitting on his stomach.
He didn’t have time to wonder what it was when he was called again.
Albus was staring at the ceiling, serving himself some coffee from the machine at Tony´s office when he blanked out for a second and heard the man yelp.
“Albus it´s spilling!” he shouted loud enough to make the boy react. His half open eyelids fixed on the cup and then on the floor before taking lots of paper and wiping the floor with it “I´m sorry! Imsorry,Imsorry,Imsorry” he muttered before the man grabbed his right wrist and pulled down his soaked sleeve to reveal a growing red spot “Dude you burnt yourself! Are you ok? Does it hurt?” he said lifting him up.
Albus head spinned wildly enough to make him stumble against a wall. The man passed an arm around his waist “Jesus, Albus, what´s wrong?” Albus groaned while rubbing his eyes with his other hand.
“I´m sorry, I´m just… I´m… I´m ok, it doesn´t hurt. I promise I´m sorry” he told the man as he put him down on his chair.
“Hey, hey, it´s ok, it´s just some bean water. Look at me” the boy pulled his red eyes to look at his friend “I´ll go get some ice to put on that, yeah? Sit here for a second” he waited until the boy nodded to walk out of the office. Albus stared at the disaster on the floor and felt horrible. He looked around and found some kleenex on the desk. He hoped he wouldn´t mind and started wiping the floor again.
“Mister Serra?” The trainee asked him outside the office. Albus looked up at him and then at the floor. “Mister Serra you´re green! Please lay down, I´ll call someone to clean that up” the boy trotted to help him sit on the chair again.
“i-it´s fine. I´m ok, Jeremy” he said feeling his head puffy. The boy left him there for a second and then leaned on the frame of the door.
“Lee, can you get me some chocolate from my backpack? Mister Serra isn´t feeling well!” he shouted as the boy shrank on his seat.
“Mister Serra? Does he need some water?” a feminine voice asked with a worried tone. Possibly the intern from last week he had to sign her papers for.
“Yeah! and get someone from cleaning!” Albus heard a reply and felt his cheeks burning as Jeremy knelt next to him.
“Thank you” he whispered to the blonde. He directed a genuine smile at the albino. “Mister Serra has helped me a lot since I got here. Please don´t thank me. It´s the least I can do for you, mister!” Albus felt himself sink into the chair further as Lee handed him Jeremy´s candy bar.
“You´re looking a little pale, mister” She said when he was about to take a bite. Jeremy was about to say something when he heard himself laugh. Lee smiled triumphantly.
“Still, mister, have you slept enough? I saw you doze off during the report meeting with the interns yesterday…” Jeremy continued, his cheeks burning red. Albus swallowed feeling guilty someone had seen him fighting to keep himself awake.
“Don´t fall off yet, soldier, we still got work to do” Sasha came inside the office with Tony behind her. He put the ice on his burnt hand and he didn´t even twitch. The four stared at him with worry. “Does it hurt?” Sasha asked him. Albus didn´t look up, only shrugged.
“Thanks Tony…Sorry for the mess” he apologized putting his hand away. He tried to stand up, but his legs refused to do so.
“Don´t mind it. But maybe you should stay here for a moment” He bit his lip.
“I still have work to do…” he tried to stand up, but Sasha pushed him back to the chair.
“Well, then it´s a good moment to just rely on us for help. You have that meeting with the trainees again don´t you?” he nodded slowly. “You two” she directed the trainees, who squared up instantly “Make a summary and send it to me before clocking out. I´ll make the paperwork and Tony will help with the mails” The boys both responded with “yes, ma´am” Albus jumped trying to stop her, but Sasha gave him a freezing look. “You rest here, workaholic. You trying to imitate Zarai with her unhealthy habits? Just eat your candy bar, boy”
“But we´ve got that meeting with…” she put Tony´s coat on his shoulders.
“You´re in no conditions to listen to old men talking about how far to the right a letter should be to increase sales a 10%” she rubbed his back before pulling away “Just sleep a bit yeah?” she silenced him.
He tugged the cozy coat over his shoulders close to him. Hiding his face with it. “Thank you…”
Sasha smiled and pulled everyone out of Tony´s office as the cleaning lady took care of the mess. Jeremy and Lee walked out the office wishing him to get better soon after leaving some more candy. He thanked them and saw them snickering to each other as they went out.
Albus pulled his knees close to his chest and the coat covered his back when he fell asleep against the desk.
Tony´s coat was warm.
He never mentioned it to Zarai, but when he was working at home that night, or well, the early morning of the next day, he received a photo from Tony.
It was him curled up into a ball in the chair with only his white hair sticking out of the brown coat.
“A wild tired cinnamon roll has appeared!” Tony wrote below it.
Sasha keysmashed and put lots of faces laughing.
Albus just shook his head and grinned before he continued working.
Didn´t stop until dawn when Zarai came in to tell him they were leaving in a few minutes.
He arrived to the office with the same exhausted face from yesterday but when he came out, Lee was there with a coffee on her hands.
“Jeremy sends you this sir” she said to the mute boy.
“I…uh…thank you, Lee” he said as he shifted the coffee cup and saw it had a number and a smiley face. He looked up at her with his cheeks fired up. “Uh…”
Lee simply walked away before he could say anything.
He showed it to Tony and Sasha at lunch and snickered to the other “Aren´t you popular, boy! I´ve also had girls ask me for your number!” Tony howlered
“What?” Sasha grinned as he blushed
“But you´re taken already aren´t you? With that freckled boy you always talking about”
“Sann?” Albus widened his eyes. “Oh, I…no, no. It´s not…” he remembered his smile at the party, the tuxedo and the rose on his chest, his dimples, his hair looking like fire in the sunset and immediately went silent. “I wish but It´s more complicated than that”
Both leaned on him. He let out a heavy sigh before staring at the city from their table on the roof top.
“I met him two years ago, but I don´t remember anything from that period. I know I learnt what I know back then…but it´s blank. I feel like something important happened…but everytime I try to remember it´s like…it just hurts and it´s uncomfortable” he said rounding one thumb with the other “I want to remember that meeting, but I can´t. I just recently remembered some… things” he continued to explain, the images of handlers touching him all over came to his head. The shocks. “And then there´s…” the problem that´s he´s someone else´s pet and I´m not supposed to get close to him. “Anyways, it´s messy” he smiled at his quiet friends “It´s dumb to say that I would be completely fine just by seeing him being happy even if I´m far?”
Both stared at him for an uncomfortably long time.
“Does Zarai know of your amnesia?” Sasha asked bluntly, playing with the bracelet in her left wrist. Albus had to shrug.
“Did you have an accident or…?”
Albus had to think hard about it. “…maybe I had someone hit my head repeatedly…” Sasha opened her mouth outraged “No, no it´s ok. I don´t know for sure. I just remember feeling numb after a hit” he hurried to explain. “Can we change the subject?” he asked closing his eyes, feeling ill suddenly.
“…ok” both laid back on their chairs as Albus sighed relieved “You should get that head checked up tho´. Two years is a long time, Albus” Tony told him.
Albus bit his tongue to not spit he didn´t remember most of his life anyways. Or his parent´s faces, or his own name.
He instead tried to put a smile. A mask that pleased everyone was easier to pull than try to uncover the truth.
“So, please help with Jeremy? I don´t wanna break the poor boy´s heart”
It took a while for them to talk normally to him again, but in the end, Jeremy was understanding when he explained he was not available. In fact, he had smiled and thanked him for being honest and Albus could pull an all nighter in peace because of that.
He cried on Lee´s shoulder later at the bus station, but that was something Albus didn´t need to know.
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wreckofawriter · 5 years
Text
Pencil Sketches
Pairing: Cedric Diggory x Reader
Warnings: Ummm none fluffy
Word Count: 2,738
Summary: You start receiving sketches of yourself and find out who the artist is in a very surprising way.
A/n: Hi this is my first Cedric fic. I dont exactly love it buuuut whatever.
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You remember when it all started. It was four months ago. You had just had a particularly hard day, you were late to Charms and got 5 points taken from your house, you spilled ink all over your positions essay, you got pumpkin juice on your blouse and forgot about a very difficult quiz in DADA. You were heading to the back of the library to choose a book when something fell out of the large amounts of papers you were holding. You groaned bending down to pick it up as you did you glance at the contents of the page and your heart stopped.
It took you only a second to figure out what was on the paper. It was you. You were glaring down at a notebook, your eyes appearing to shine as you clutched a quill in your right hand. Your hair hanging in front of your frustrated face, your lips drawn into a thin line. It was the best drawing you had ever seen, for a second you thought it was a photograph. But it was a drawing, a drawing of you, a drawing of you that looked so realistic it almost scared you. The pencil marks were flowing yet sharp, shading was done in just the right places to give your face depth. It was like looking in a black and white mirror.
    You stood in the middle of the hallway for what must have been a good five minutes just staring at the photo in amazement. You then realized what you were doing and continued to the library.
From there the drawings became a normal part of your life. You would usually receive five to six a week in your bag, waiting at your desk or even in your dorm room. You had no idea how they managed to swing that. Each one was more beautiful than the last and you swear that they made you look much prettier in the drawing than you really were. Most were done in pencil a few in quill and one in charcoal. Each one seemed to be a different mood, sometimes you would be scowling, sometimes smirking, sometimes smiling and one was even of you with your head down on a desk your eyes closed and your hair hanging in your face. The ones you received the most were ones of you laughing. Your lips split open in a smile and your eyes crinkled or just shut altogether.
Many times you had tried to find the artist who had drawn you without luck. They never left any notes or indications and it made it extremely difficult to find the culprit. You wished for nothing more than to meet and thank the person who had brought so much happiness into your life with their artwork. But they never revealed themselves even after four months, nothing. You began to worry, what if they never revealed themselves? It was your last year after all, you would be leaving in a few months. Eventually, you stopped looking and simply hoped they would reveal themselves.
“Ms. Y/l/n,” McGonagall called to you.
“Yes, Professor?” You asked your arms full of books as you made your way back to your common room.
“Could you please follow me? I have something we need to discuss.” She clipped, beckoning for you to follow her.
Your eyebrows scrunched together in momentary confusion before following the orders you had been given.
As you followed McGonagall through the castle you wracked your brain for what you could have possibly done wrong. Did they think you cheated on an exam? Did they find your stash of food in your dorm? Surely that wasn't that big of a deal. Then you remembered the bottle of firewhiskey under your bed and fear rose in your throat. What if they expelled you? What would you do? Your heart pounding you were lead into a room expecting all of hell to rain upon you, but when it opened you were greeted by Dumbledore's warm smile.
“Ahh Y/n, looks as if the last of you have arrived.”
You glanced around the room and easily recognized two-thirds of the famous fourth-year trio and a young girl you didn't recognize.
McGonagall went to talk to Dumbledore as you made your way over to Ron and Hermione.
“Umm do you guys know what going on?” You asked as you approached them.
“Not a clue,” Hermione responded with as she glanced around the room as if looking for clues on their current situation.
“Are we in trouble or something?” You inquired.
Ron snorted, “As if Hermione would ever get in trouble.” he jeered earning a glare from the bushy-haired girl.
“I think it has something to do with the next task.” Hermione guessed.
“Then why am I here?” you wondered.
Hermione opened her mouth to answer but she was cut off by Dumbledore.
“I assume all of you are wondering what is happening, well as Mrs. Granger pointed out it does have something to do with the task tomorrow.”
Everyone else seemed very excited you, on the other hand, were very confused, what did the next task have to do with you?
“Tomorrow morning your friends are going to have to rescue something of great importance to them from the bottom of the black lake. You, my friends, are those things.”
Hermione gasped. Ron raised both his eyebrows and the girl seemed a bit frightened.
“You will be put under a spell and not remember a thing until you break the surface again. I promise all of you will be fine. So if you could just take som-”
“Umm excuse me?” You asked cutting off your professor, “Why am I here?” His eyebrows raised in confusion. “I mean I get the whole rescuing someone that is important to them thing, I mean Hermione for Krum.” Hermione flashed red and Ron rolled his eyes. “Ron for Harry and I guessing she's Fleur’s little sister or something?” You said gesturing to the young girl, “I just don't get why I'm here.”
Now Dumbledore's face was filled with amusement, a small smile on his lips. “You don't know?” he asked.
“Know what?”
He started to laugh, “For such a bright girl I expected you had already found out.”
You were beginning to feel stupid, “Found out what?”
“Have you been receiving drawings for the past few months?” He mused glancing at Mcgonagall who also seemed amused.
“Y-yeah, wait how do you know about those?”
“It's impossible to miss,” Mcgonagall said sweetly, “Cedric is constantly pouring over as sketchbook in his classes, particularly the ones you are in, Ms. Y/l/n.”
You heard Hermione let out a giggle as your face flashed a brilliant red. Your head was spinning. Cedric was the one who was giving those to you? The golden boy of Hogwarts was spending his time sketching you?
“Cedric is the one drawing me?” You managed to get from your mouth, the sentence came out squeaker than you would have liked but at least you managed it.
“Yes Y/n, I'm quite surprised you hadn't noticed the boys admiration in you.” Dumbledore smiled as your eyes got impossibly bigger and your stomach began to fill with butterflies. “Now we don't want to waste much more time." He sighed, “Take some of this, it will put you straight to sleep, although I must warn you it tastes terrible.” He passed each of you a bottle full of a deep purple liquid.
You downed it quickly and almost immediately your world grew dark.
Cedric had grown exceedingly nervous as he stood on the docks in the middle of the lake. While the others around him seemed to be scared of what lurked in the dark of the lake he was concerned at where you were. He hadn’t seen you at breakfast, where he was planning to slip his newest drawing into your bag and now he couldn't find you here either. What if you were sick? Where you ok? Had you gotten hurt? He silently shamed himself for caring so much for a person who didn't even know he existed but he couldn't help it. He had tried to stop caring about you, but fate seemed to work against him as all he could do was see you no matter where he looked. It was as if you had been placed behind a glass case in a bakery, with a price tag much too high. So all he could do was look and wonder how your lips would taste against his own.
Finally, he gave up looking for you and looked at the challenge ahead of him. If you weren't here he wanted to make sure you heard from everyone else how he had won. Determination took over his features, he had a plan and he just hoped the others were less prepared than he. Just then the horn was blown and he dove into the water quickly casting a bubble charm around his head and begging to swim into the depths of the lake. He quickly located the singing he remembered form the terrible egg he had gotten and swum toward it. He almost choked when he saw what was waiting for him. You. Your ankles were tied with rope and your beautiful y/e/c eyes resting closed as your y/h/c hair floating in the water. The others tied around you suddenly meant nothing as he stared at you. He thought you resembled an angel floating in the water, all you were missing were wings. He then remembered he was in composition and swam towards you at a quickened rate. He thought for a minute, inspecting the rope holding you before muttering a spell. As the bounds broke he snatched you and began to swim upwards. He then saw Harry come into view, he nodded at him and continued upward.
Your eyes popped open and you found yourself gasping for air as you coughed up water. The first thing you noticed was how cold you were, everything thing was cold except an arm swimming you towards the dock. You looked up to see Cedric dragging you towards the dock his face full of worry. He glanced over at you and smiled and blushed.
“Are you alright?” He asked over the cheering of the crowd. You nodded still coughing.
When you reached the ladder you were helped up and quickly wrapped in a wool blanket as you continued coughing tiring to get the water out of your system, finally you were able to intake air and breathe normally and you saw that you were on a dock in the middle of the lake but you could hardly see anything over the crowd of people swarming you, well more swarming Cedric. You then realized that Cedric had his arm securely wrapped around you as he maneuvered you through the crowds and your face flushed red. Cedric led you to an empty bench overlooking the lake on the platform getting congratulated all the way. When you sat down he pulled you close to him in attempts to warm your shivering your form. You instantly leaned into his warm body, looking up at him to meet his grey eyes. He blushed bright red and looked away from you. Just then the crowd erupted into cheers and you looked up to see Krum emerge, Hermione, gasping for breath as she appeared to shriek a bit at his shark head before he quickly changed back.
    “I hope Harry’s alright.” You murmured as you peered into the water.
    “I'm sure he's fine, I saw him when I was getting you.” Cedric blushed a bit when he mentioned you.
    “Did you see Krum?”
    “Uhh no, I didn't,” Cedric answered.
    “Why is he up here before him?” You questioned worriedly, your eyes scanned for the young boy in the water. You didn't know Harry well but you wished for no harm to come to him.
    “I don't know.” Cedric seemed just as confused as you.
    You both waited for Harry to show up as the minutes ticked down. Then suddenly you gasped. In all the excitement you had completely forgotten that Cedric was revealed as the mysterious artist.
    “What is it?” The grey-eyed boy asked you.
    You turned and looked at him. There was no denying that he was absolutely stunning. He was beyond handsome with his sharp features and kind eyes. You saw him blush a bit as you took in his profile, which only made him more attractive. But not only was he gorgeous he was amazingly kind, talented and smart. You opened your mouth to confess your knowledge on the portraits he had drawn of you. But you were interrupted by shouting and yelling and you both turned away from each other to see Harry emerging from the water, with not only Ron, but the young blonde haired girl as well. You sighed in relief and looked back at Cedric who was already staring at you. He blushed for the 1000th time when you met his grey orbs and looked away again. Then he turned back to look at you with something new in his eyes, determination.
    “Hey Y/n I need to tell you something.” He said his voice a bit louder than it had been before.
    “Sure what's up?” You asked.
    “You probably have already realized this but clearly you mean a lot to me, I mean with the whole rescuing you think that was probably obvious but umm,” He paused then continued, “Imtheonewhosebeengivingyouthedrawings” He said quickly his face burning a deep shade of crimson.
    If you had not already known what he was going to say you would have been thoroughly confused, but because of your recent discoverings, you had managed to gather about what he said.
    “I know.” You answered simply.
    “Oh ok- wait, WHAT?” He said his eyes wide his face getting impossibly redder.
    You giggled rolling your eyes playfully.
“For how long?” he gasped.
“Umm, it's almost noon so about, I'll say 14 hours?” You guessed.
He blinked rapidly then smacked his forehead with his hand. “Of course you know, they probably told you before they put you in the lake.” He said clearly feeling very stupid.
“They're amazing by the way.” You complemented, “Although I'm pretty sure you make me look much better in the drawings than I am in person.” You giggled.
He looked at you and scoffed, “Are you kidding.” He murmured running his thumb along your jawline. “The most talented artist in the world couldn’t do your beauty justice.”
You flashed a deep red as you felt your stomach erupt with butterflies once more. You bit your lip, the exact place his eyes lingered.
He leaned in millimeters from your lips, “May I kiss you?” He asked his lips brushing against yours as he spoke.
You simply closed the space between the two of you in an answer. His lips were warm against your cool ones and your hands found your way to his damp hair. The kiss was sweet and passionate, his lips moved slowly against your own making you swoon. As you pulled away you were for the second time in the past hour gasping for air.
“I have something for you.” He whispered turning to grab a bag next to him. He pulled out a piece of paper and handed it to you.
You couldn't help the small smile on your face as he looked at his newest drawing. You had your head thrown back your eyes closed and a smile wide on your face, it was clear you were laughing.
“I always loved drawing you laughing.” He said shyly.
“I still don't understand how you are so good.” You said in amazement.
“Thanks.” He blushed
“No, thank you. Thank you so much for all of these. They made my day so much better.” You said, “Just looking at them made me happy.”
    Now as you looked at them you felt your world fall apart. Sobs wrecked your body as you stared at the drawings you had saved. You couldn't think, your head throbbed and you felt like you were falling into a deep dark pit but you could never hit the bottom. Your tears soaked the picture of you with your head thrown back in laughter and you were sure you would never laugh again.
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trashcatsnark · 3 years
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What’s your opinion on Kerry being available to only male V when it’s mentioned in-game that he’s bi (correct me if I’m wrong, I have terrible memory)?? I feel like they should’ve had bi romance options if they were able to implement both gay and straight ones.
Oh anon, oooooh anon. I love you dearly, but you intentionally or not might as well have thrown lit dynamite in my ask box. This discourse has been such a strange beast within this fandom and I have definitely shared some vague thoughts about it before. I’m putting everything under a read more, to help stave off some....harassment or putting it in people’s lives who may not want it. 
 I still remember I was frankly heartbroken and upset when I first learned Kery wasn’t romanceable by female V when the game first officially came out, but before I played it; River and Panam weren’t even really known about, cause they weren’t talked about much in the promo material,  plus Kerry was shown in romance scenes with what looked to be female V. So, if you go back far enough you’ll find me in December cope posting and being the saddest and angriest of beans, because other than Johnny who I knew was likely off the table. He was one of the only characters I wanted to potentially romance. Now, I’m further away from it, have  processed my feelings regarding it and am more rational I believe regarding the issue. 
But, that being said, a large issue of this sort of discourse is that; no matter what anyone says, someone somwhere is upset. I’ve been insulted, blocked, accused of fetishizing gay men, and so much over my opinion regarding this matter. I’m still currently debating if I even wanna tag this, cause the issue almost always brings negativity to my blog and to me. I have very little interest in being berated for this, so we’ll see how I feel after I finish typing this all out. I’m going to try to go through all my issues, my points, my troubles and feelings about the matter. But, at the end of the day, it is merely my opinion. If someone disagrees, fine, just don’t attack people or berate them over pixels in a video game. Just dont. That’s all I ask. Okay, so I’m gonna divide this into talking points and whatever, now. 
Firstly, Kerry is bisexual. Point blank, period. I’ve seen folks try to argue that his wife was like comphet, which if you dont know means that sometimes exclusively homosexual people will try to force themselves into heterosexual relationships because society has conditioned them to believe they have to be straight. While, I’m not negating the fact that this happens, as a bisexual/pansexual (I use the terms interchangeably to define my experience and feelings)  person I’ve struggled with it when making sense of my attraction to women. It genuinely is something that happens. This is not the case for Kerry; he doesn’t ever hide his attraction to men, between TTRPG lore and the video game he has had two wives , and he is stated by game developers and TTRPG creator to be bisexual.He is bisexual. Getting that out there, saying other wise, in my opinion is a level of bi erasure. That being said, I do still have my grievances with how the game chose to handle his bisexuality and bisexuality as whole, also imo, the game generally doesn’t seem...to treat players who are attracted to men well… 
But before I get into that, I wanna make clear, I feel like Cyberpunk 2077 should have had more romance options for every orientation. If you’re not going to create a player-sexual style of romance; ie where every romanceable character is attracted to the player regardless and wish to focus on each character having their own predetermined sexuality; only have one character for each sexuality is kind of bullshit. If you’re a lesbian player and you’re not into Judy, you get nothing, except a fuck around with Meredith (who I will get to later). You’re a straight woman, but not into River, shit out of luck. You’re a gay man who’s not into Kerry, sucks to suck bud. You’re a straight man who’s not into Panam (kind dont get how you wouldn’t be but who am i to judge), well, you can fuck Meredith… so woooo. Oh also, if you’re not attracted to women, you will still be forced to watch in first person pov a sex scene with Alt and if you want Johnny to like you, you gotta date a girl. Also, all the male love interests will be sidelined mostly…. Hooray… But I digress, either go in with all romance options bi/pan/player sexual, or give more options for romance. Cause now you have the issue of people not getting the partner they hoped for and not liking their only option. Now, you got people trying to make the Judy  bi, which is lesbian erasure and lesbophobic, along with people saying Kerry isn’t bi and can’t be with women which is bi erasure and biphobic. Whereas, if you had just gone in from the get go with either more options or a player-sexual romance system; we wouldn’t be here, CDPR. 
Okay, so next thing, now that I’ve addressed my issues with the entire romance system and that yes, Kerry is bi. Should Kerry have been able to be romanced as female V? Yes and no. Which sounds vague, but I’m going somewhere. With the current set up of it; Kerry being romanceable to a female V would have unfairly given female players an additional love interest over male players. Female V would have the option of Judy, River, or Kerry. And Male V’s would have the option of Kerry or Panam. That’s not fair. I get that, inherently. CDPR painted themselves into a corner, by only letting there be two romances for “each” gender, one for “each” sexuality, and then using a canonically bi character for one of them. They played themselves, they were either gonna have to give an unfair amount of love interest to one side of their gender system or make a bi character who will only pursue one gender. So, they went for the latter. 
Now, some people feel thats fine, because Kerry having a gender preference is fine and its okay for bi people to lean a certain way in regards to gender and its okay for them to not be attracted to people. And that is true. I am a bisexual woman who leans a little more towards men, I get that. However, I have only been given one reason for Kerry’s preference for male V over female V. And it was by a developer of the game who stated that Kerry pursues Male V and not Female V because Male V reminds him more of Johnny… And I hate that. I personally, hate it so deeply, because to me it does a complete disservice to Kerry and V’s relationship and Kerry’s arc. Because even with female V you see him being preoccupied with Johnny and V’s connection to Johnny, then you see him move past that. So, to then state, its still a deciding factor in him romancing V is so wrong to me. Like why???? Why would you do that to people who like Kerry??? Why would you put that in their heads, that Kerry on some level, subconsciously or not, was thinking about Johnny when he decides to romance V. Cause that’s not in the game, in the game you get the vibe he’s moving on past Johnny, like he’s growing, developing, genuinely likes V. But that stupid tweet, just radiates rancid vibes, whyyy???  
And then, outside of that nasty tweet, I have to ask what other reason is there for why he prefers male V over fem V.  They’re...the same characters essentially, just with different pronouns and body type. They also can look like whatever you want; they’re completely customizable. So, Its based off of what the game associates with  gender characteristics and nothing else, meaning, his attraction is rooted solely in their gender and he turns down fem V by virtue of them being a woman and nothing else. Which, yeah, bisexual/pansexual people have preferences but when that preference completely excludes a gender based on nothing but gender…. Uhh????? See my issue???? 
And I’ve seen people saying, well, its better than CDPR playing into slutty will date anybody bisexual stereotypes. But, the thing is...THEY STILL DO THAT which is what drives me up the god damn wall; they managed to do slutty bi stereotypes and I don’t even get kiss the boy, which again, I get the need for fairness but wow, just wow. And lemme explain. 
Meredith is the only character, other than joytoys, whom you can have sex with regardless of gender, body type, etc. She is the only character who shows that she is attracted to V on some level regardless of gender. 
She is a one night stand. Her sex animations are the same as joytoys. She treated like a promiscuous love phobic woman.  And having characters like that is fine, my own V is promiscuous and love phobic. But, we can acknowledge that in a video game by a AAA game company having the only character who is at least physically attracted to the player no matter what, be nothing but sex fodder...isn’t great bi representation, right? 
Oh, and Kerry himself still is a promiscuous bisexual man, he just won’t romance female V because apparently, according to a dev, they don’t remind him of Johnny enough. AND THATS THE DEVS WORDS, NOT MINE, I HATE THAT. Like, Kerry is shown to have people’s lingerie around his house. He’s stated by Johnny to be someone who fucks around. He gets a blowjob from a man in a stairwell. 
The two most blatantly canonically bi character in this game are promiscuous; one wont romance V at all and just wants sex, the other will only romance a male V because at worse, he’s comparing them mentally subconsciously to his dead friend and at best….because….reasons…. Literally, from what I understand for Kerry to romance V, they have to have the “male” body type and “male” voice. Meaning, fem V could literally by all appearances look like masc V, body type wise, but because she uses female pronouns and has a feminine sounding voice...no… the stars say no… 
In my honest opinion, it is bad bisexual representation and a not so well thought out romance system for a game. 
But, that being said, I literally never romance anyone, because I’m a Johnny simp. So, the fuck do I know.
oh god do i tag this.... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
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anotherbeingsworld · 4 years
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Late Nights, New Beginnings.
Pairing: Bryce Lahela x F!MC (Casey Valentine)
Word count: 2761
Summary: Bryce and Casey went out on a spontaneous night out to play bowling. 
Disclaimer: All right goes to PB, I dont own anything except the storyline! 
A/N: Hii! So, I am back with a new fic and I am pretty excited ! (Honestly, I said that for all my fics lol) This fic was inspired by @thundergom​ Open Heart AU! which all of you should check it out, IT IS AMAZING!!! The screenshot below was from one of the scenes in the AU, and they are kind enough to let me write a fic on this adorable scene of your MC (Camilla) and Bryce! I hope I did this fic justice, and I hope all of you enjoy reading it! I am a huge fan of bowling myself and, this has been a fun write! ENJOY! (CHECK IT OUT THEIR OH AU, COZ ITS SO GOOOOD!!!) 
Tags:  @bitchloveskcbaseball​ ​​ , @storyofmychoices​ ​​ , @jaxsmutsuo​ ​​ , @mvalentine​ ​​ , @princess-geek​ ​​ , @lahellacute​ ​​​ , @kacie-0156​ ​​​ , @simp-for-villains​ ​​​ , @annekebbphotography​ ​​​ , @brycelahel​ ​​​ , @mrsbhandari​ ​​​ , @dcbbw​ ​​​ , @choicessa​ ​​​ , @choices-confessions​ ​ , @aylamwrites​ ​​ , @fantasyoverreality98​ ​, @drakewalker04​ , @baltersome​ , @thecordoniandiaries​ , @thundergom​ 
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A  break-up. The major reason Casey is late for work the next day. Her hair was in a messy bun, as she didn’t have time to freshen up as she was late to arrive that day. She let out a groan as she changed into her scrubs, as the locker room was empty; a sign that she is in trouble. 
After struggling with wearing her scrubs, she dashed her way through to where interns are gathered. She stood at the back with Jackie, who looks at her with amusement. 
‘You had an long night, I presumed?’ She raised her eyebrows as Casey shook her head. 
‘Zack and I are through, we broke up last night.’ I admitted as the others started walking forward. She is feeling grateful that her patients weren’t the first to be picked for rounds that day.
‘That’s sucks, I’m sorry Cas.’ Jackie places her hands on Casey’s shoulder as an attempt at comfort. She just shrugged  as she proceeds on her work.
She went quiet for the rest of the day, as the break-up affected her work. She would often zone out, sometimes… she would get emotional over it. But she tries her very best to not cry it in front of her patients. One of her patients notice her expression and immediately asked if she was okay. Casey would just nod and brush the subject off, not wanting to get herself emotional; because once she gets into the story, the tears will never stop. 
Somehow, seeing and treating patients helps distract her from the actual world. Seeing those hopeful looks in the patient eyes makes her smile even wider. It's equivalent to a child on Christmas morning, and the gifts are equivalent to the happiness they get as the patients got to live a happy and healthy life. Casey always liked to help people, ever since she was a kid; she loved to make people happy. She felt blessed to witness the happiness from a patient being cured and even the people she gets to meet along the way. It is an amazing career in her eyes. 
But at this very moment… it exhausts her. After the break-up, she ended up hogging a whole tub of ice-cream before Sienna stops her. She didn’t get enough rest, as she spends the rest of the night bawling her eyes out, watching all the rom-coms as she yelled, ‘love isn’t real.’ She ended up passing out at five in the morning, making her late to work as she arrived later, which is unlikely for her. 
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Zack and Casey have been together since high school, as they were known as the high school sweethearts of Arella High. They were the ‘it’ couple at the time, but… as high school ends. They have been quarrels here and there between them, as they would get into an argument a lot. But, their relationship survive until last night, as he had brought a girl to the small apartment they shared. They were getting on each other’s faces, as Casey witness them after a long day of work. She felt hurt, but… deep down, she knows it is bound to happen. After the unwanted visitor left, the truth finally comes out. 
‘I have been seeing other people..’ 
Casey bits her lip. How long has he done this? 
‘How long?’
‘It has been… a few months, actually.’ He lets out a laugh as the surrounding atmosphere thickens. 
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ Casey felt her eyes started to tear up. She knows they have been little-in-love as before, but… the fact that he has already moved on. It was painful, as Casey keeps her head up, forcing herself to not cry in front of him. 
‘I was… waiting for the right time…’ his voice was quiet, as the darkness is taking over the dimmed room.
‘Let me go, Zack.’ Casey said with a slow tone in her voice after what felt like an eternity of silence. 
Zack’s eyes widen through the sentence, he turns to face her. 
‘But..’ He stutters as Casey cuts him.
‘No, just… let me go. I don’t want to pretend anymore.’ Her voice is sharp as it cuts the tense atmosphere around them. 
He nods slowly as Casey walks out of the door. Leaving him behind. Her heart is hurting since letting go was never easy. The feelings between them aren’t mutual anymore, but… seeing him already to moving on; her heart can't handle the pain. After leaving ‘their’ apartment, Casey crashes at her friend’s apartment, as she doesn’t have anywhere to sleep for the night. It was already late, as she occupied the empty room in the apartment. The room was furnished as Casey gets herself comfortable, as she ended up crying silently in the darkness, leaving nothing behind. 
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The memory stings as the tears ended up appearing once more as she lay on one of the beds in the on-call room. Her pager was quiet today, which she is silently grateful for since she is a mess. The door opens as Casey frantically wiped her tears away. 
‘Hey…’ His voice was heard, as her eyes perked up at the familiarity of the voice. 
She looked up, and saw Bryce took a seat on the edge of the bed. His eyes look concerned. Casey sat beside him, as he took her hand in his, as he lets out a squeeze.
‘Sienna told me you had a bad night, you okay?’ his voice is a concern, as Casey is wiping her tears away.
‘I am okay now, it's just… one of those things you know.’ She tried to shrug it off as Bryce didn’t buy any of it. 
Bryce leans forward as he wipes a few tears away that was visible. She felt her cheeks flustered by the action. 
‘I know just the thing to cheer you up.’ His mischievous smile appears from out of the blue.
‘Hm?’ Casey is deeply interested in the ways to cure a broken heart after a break-up.
‘It’s a surprise. Get ready after your shift is done, meet me at the entrance!’ Bryce said with a wink without revealing the plan. 
‘Fine, I will see you in approximately 7 hours at the entrance.’ Casey lets out a reply with a hint of sarcasm as Bryce lets out a chuckle. 
He stood up to leave, as Casey took a hold of his wrist.
‘Thank you for stopping by.’ The smile on her face looked genuine, making him happy.
‘Anytime.’ He places a kiss on her knuckles before he left the room. A smile was present on her face, as she feels excited for what he has in mind. 
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After her shift is over, she changed into something more comfortable as she felt very excited about what Bryce has planned. As she was making her way to meet him, her mind wonders about him. He is Bryce Lahela, and he has been there for her since the very beginning. She never gets herself too close to people as she was with Zack at the moment, but… there is something about him that made her heart happy. 
He has the looks, and the hair was a bonus. But his heart was something else. He often thought he would be another frat guy who needs his ego to be stroke every minute. He is different, a good type of different. She remembers the first time he comforted her as always, he has been there from the very beginning. His arms around her, comforting her and support, was something she never expected to see from him. The thought of him is giving her butterflies, as she tried to erase the feeling away. She just broke up. She wasn’t supposed to feel that way. But her inner self was telling her the opposite. 
Her eyes lit up at the sight of him, waiting for her at the entrance. Casey quickens her steps as they leave the hospital, going to wherever Bryce had planned for them. 
The walk was quick, as they stopped in front of a rusty old building making her question his intentions to butchered her in an abandoned warehouse as he passes her organs to the wolves. She shakes her head, clearing her thoughts as Bryce leads her inside. The neon lights took her breath away as the sound of pins falling brought her back to reality. 
‘Where did you found this place?’ Casey said with awe as her eyes gaze upon the place. There were neon lights as far as she could go. The place is a neon wonderland for bowlers, as they made their way to the counter. 
‘I heard some doctors have been talking about it, as they called it a ‘hip’ spots in Boston.’ Bryce replies happily as he paid for their shoes and games.
‘Let me pay for it, Bryce.’ She was about to take out her purse before he stops her.
‘It's okay, tonight is my treat. Consider it a gift.’ Bryce said with a sly smile on his face, as Casey gives in.
‘But, I’ll be buying the food.’ She pointed out as Bryce laughs away, nodding along.
‘Fine. Now, let’s bowl!’  They took their shoes with a full enthusiasm as they make their way to their lane.
They were at lane #7, Casey immediately changed into their specialized shoes as Bryce inputs their name into the system. After a few moments, it is done. They are ready to bowl. 
The place was so beautiful that it distracts her from the game. Casey was about to bowl before Bryce called her,
‘I have an idea, the winner buys us a pizza?’ He smirked at the idea, as Casey smiled evilly.
‘You have come to the master territory, young child.’ Casey winks before she bowls, earning a perfect strike. 
‘Holy sm-‘ He was cut off by a group of high school students looking at them with an eyebrow raised. 
‘Is that all you got?’ The boy said as he observes Casey’s technique.
‘That was a lucky shot, girly. Here let me show you how it's done.’ A brunette stepped forward with a ball as she earned a strike. 
Casey lets out a scoff, 
‘That doesn’t mean its right for you to crash our game.’ 
They looked at her, and laugh with a mocking tone. 
‘Listen, let's do this the right way, shall we? If we lose, you will never see us again… but if we win. You will pay for our food for tonight, because I think both of us wanted to have a huge celebratory feast when we win. Right Cas?’ He turns to her, as Casey nods with full determination. 
The boy looks challenged as he and his friends get themselves ready to battle it out. Casey and Bryce look determined as they are ready to fight them.
------------------ ‘
It was their last game, as they were five points away from beating their opponents. It was 250 and 255 on the scoreboard as the boy is making his last throw. He manages to knock six out of the pins. Casey felt herself let out a small sigh of relief, but.. the nerves were still there. If they got a spare, their team would win. Casey is hoping silently, praying that they win. 
The ball is slowly rolling down the lane, as time was drifting. The nerves inside of her are growing as the ball hits the pins, and….
IT’S A SPLIT. 
Casey almost cheered as they saw their opponents final score to be 261. Bryce was smiling from ear-to-ear as they have a chance to win it all. It was Casey’s turn to bowl. She makes her way to her ball. Her hands were chilly from the nerves she was getting. She took a deep breath, as Bryce took a candid pic of her from behind before cheering her on. She lets the ball go, as both teams were focused on it. 
Casey held her hand covering her eyes, as the ball rolls on the smooth tiles. It was until she heard the pins dropped as she opened her eyes. 
Bryce coming from behind with enormous smiles as she scored a STRIKE! They heard the utter disappointment from the opposite team. But… none of it matters at the moment. Her eyes were gazing into his, as the world around them fades away. Casey felt herself feeling happy and free for the first time that day. She doesn’t know it is from the adrenaline or the happiness she felt with him.. but at that moment. Everything felt right as she leaned forward, as their lips meet.
Bryce returned the favor as they kissed for a few moments before letting go. Somehow, it felt like she was in a movie where they finally won the ultimate battle and it was the victory kiss where it was framed in those vintage portraits. After they pulled away, there was a bit of fear in her; the fear of not knowing what happens next. She looked at him with new happiness in her. As he returns the smile with a knowing smile of his own. 
‘We win!’ Both of them cheered as their opponents who look sad, as both of them made their way to the group.
‘We will pay for your food, don’t worry!’ The boy said defensively, as he was about to make his way to the café. 
Bryce looks at them with a sincere look on his face, 
‘It’s okay kid, you don’t have to do it.’ He places his hands on the boy’s shoulder as the boy look at him in disbelief. 
‘Are you sure?’ 
Bryce nods as he pats the kid on the back. 
‘It’s okay, in fact; it’s on me tonight.’ He said as the cheers erupt from the back, as Casey looked at him with a smile on her face.
‘You are something else’ She said as she placed a kiss on his cheek before they order the food for their ‘so-called’ opponents. 
‘Something good, I hope?’ He asked from the smiles , as she winks at him.
‘A woman never tells.’ Before they proceed on ordering the food. 
----------------
They bought a huge order as the group ate happily. After the food is done, the boy from earlier approaches him. 
Bryce raised an eyebrow at his presence, 
‘I just want to say I’m sorry, I didn’t mean any of that…’ The boy said with a sad tone, as Bryce just nods accepting the  apology. 
‘It’s okay kid, I enjoyed the game.’ 
'Are you sure? I can be full of myself and... it’s a bad habit of mine; not wanting to see anybody is better than me. ' The boy explains as Bryce turns to face him.
'I am sure, but.... next time, try to tone it down okay? I think your parents won't appreciate that you have been disturbing their customers.' He raised an eyebrow as the boy looked down on his feet; regret was seen on his face. Bryce pats his back and said.
'Bad habits seem to follow us anywhere but with the good people in life; it can get better.' He spoke up as his eyes fall on Casey who is chatting it down with the others. 
The boy followed his glance, and a smile appears on his face.
‘You love her, don’t you?’ He said as Bryce just laugh it off. 
‘Love is a huge word kid, but… there is no other word that could explain how I feel about her.’ His eyes never leaving her. 
‘Well, from the looks of it. She seems to be very lucky to have you.’ He said as he walks away to join the others. 
A moment later, he came back holding a small Polaroid which made him crossed out the source from an unknown flash from somewhere. Bryce took it in his hands, of her and Casey’s moment a few minutes ago. A smile curled upon his lips at the sight of the memory.
‘My mom told me the reason they built this place is for people to make new memories, and I think this one is for you.’ The boy said happily as Bryce held it in his hands.
‘It’s the very first of many.’ He replied with hope in his voice for many adventures to come with the one Casey Valentine.
Her eyes caught his as she showcased an enormous grin on her face. At that moment, she was ready for new beginnings. The first of everything with one Bryce Lahela.
THE END. 
A/N #2: Hii! Thank you so much for reading it and, I hope all of you enjoyed it! And, @thundergom​ I HOPE I DID JUSTICE TO YOUR AU!!! Have an awesome day/night everyone! 💖💖- A.
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lanseax · 4 years
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okay so give me your opinion on all the girls, who is your fave what are your thoughts
HELL YES, thank you for giving me permission to spill my soul (obviously gonna contain spoilers)
dot: Love her, her story breaks my heart, her story hit me really hard on the aspect of doing things for yourself, being your own support system because your parents are sick or not around, and that made me instantly feel for her. i also loved how she was written, she wasn’t volatile, she didn’t explode because thats not who she was, she was tired of living through hell day after day and finally gwtting this one chance to go to hawaii and do something fun and it fucked her over. her scene of giving the lighter to rachel made so much sense like she has done EVERYTHING she can and the world keeps shitting on her. (would have liked to see a bit more of her and shelby)
fatin: so when i saw the trailer i was instantly like “who dis” and wow did they fucking serve up a god damn six course meal with her. she just wants to be a kid, she wants to have fun and party and get a B on a test without thinking how her parents are going to react. she’s every student who was told they were gifted and then their parents hounded them to keep up with their gift even if they didn’t want to. i did want to strangle her dad tho like he turned it on his daughter instead of taking responsibility fuck that. her and leah’s relationship was something i wasn’t expecting but really fell in love with. her being an anchor while leah was suffering from so much. (looking forward to more of her mom-ing the group)
leah: i’ll be honest i thought she was a whiny bitch at first, i didnt like her, her story was meh, a usual girl falls in love with boy, boy breaks her heart, girl cant cope. i wasn’t super interested in her until that turning point with fatin going missing and the deep realization that her heart is gonna be broken but she cant let that be a block for the rest of her life. she’s gonna need more help to get through it but she’s taking baby steps and we love to see that. (more of her and fatin please!!)
martha: IF ANYONE TOUCHES HER ILL FUCKING KILL THEM, i’m very worried because like she wasn’t in the “present” timeline (im assuming the interviews are present) and they were talking about her parents possibly suing. please dont hurt my baby. Her entire arc was baffling, i said it in the tags of one post that the comparison of sexual assault to hunter vs prey was a beautiful comparison i just think the ending was a bit too much. but i could write an essay on that alone. her and shelby being friends was so heart warming like they were making plans to hang out omg. PLEASE DONT HURT MY BABY. (im serious please dont hurt her)
nora: DIDNT TRUST HER FROM THE START, it was her initial line when leah asked if anyone remembered how they got there that pulled me in. she was conscious for the whole thing, no one remembered going to shore they just were there but suddenly nora was conscious and she pulled rachel to the shore??? mmmm dont buy it. her story with rachel was so deep and compelling that i was expecting more of that not her falling for a guy and the breakup. that shit made her betrayal hit different it didnt make me pissed at her it made me sad for her, gretchen completely manipulated nora’s grief into a tool to get her to agree to this. that shit hurted.
rachel: man that entire story of an athelete peaking was so well done, because its not a story often told with athletes its usually they broke something and it made them no longer able to compete or something or they get a big comeback but rarely is it, “hey you’ve done the best you can”. and i’ve seen what that can do to people, young girls especially. it hurts and its painful and you would do everything to hold onto that. it made me wanna wrap rachel in a warm hug and give her a cookie. (would like to see her get more friendly with the others, am very interested in finding out if in “present” time she knows nora was in on it and if she’ll choose her sister vs her friends)
shelby: i was honestly expecting a more violently homophobic back story. her story floored me though, im so upset at how she lashed out at becca but i know it must eat at her every day, how could it not? i really do hope she becomes more confident in who she is and who she wants to be with, i really dont wanna see her regress but i know it might happen. i know for a fact if i was in the situation and someone was as optimistic as she was i would knock em out so props to the other girls (THE SCENE where she keeps asking to “see her” i was so hoping she meant toni and they were gonna get this reunion kiss but when she said leah that made it even more intriguing)
toni: i cannot state how much i love toni and how much i related to her in the sense of just wanting to yell and scream and break shit when you’re angry, i’ve gotten to a much better place but man i knew that energy so well once upon a time. her story with regan kinda fucked me up, that type of heartbreak hurts. but seeing that and then seeing toni be so calm with shelby because they’re already in such a shit scenario and toni knows shelby has to go at her own pace FUCK THAT MADE MY HEART MELT (i need the entire piss throwing story because like... how? just how?)
my favs are toni, shelby, fatin and martha. i love all of the girls but they’re the ones im deeply invested in. i noticed a bit ago that this is shockingly one of the only shows where i love every single character. like all of them are so interesting snd complex and that just speaks to the team behind the show, like fucking kudos to them they deserve some awards.
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