#i dont feel any of the things i do when im in a place bound to the earth
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augustameretrix · 1 year ago
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now i dont know anything about anything of course, but isnt it kinda fucked to implement restorative justice while leaving the systemic and cultural root causes untouched
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sanjisboyfie · 1 year ago
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toji fluff hcs.
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requested, and i had sm fun writing this bc I DO AGREE ANON the toji x male reader tag is just full of smut atp there is never any fluff T.T i hope u enjoy lovely
toji x male reader <3 takes place before canon (mamaguro kinda dont exist sawry)
— the thing is, toji has a very, very thick wall around his heart and he rarely lets anyone in, ever. that's why! in this hc im gonna say that you two met via his job and just worked really well as partners. and then overtime, the two of you just got closer until finally toji makes a move on you.
the two of you were sitting at a restaurant, going over the recent job that you just finished. toji hummed at what you were saying, taking a swig of his beer as he remained eye contact with you.
recently, he's been seeing you in a different light. recently as in the past couple of months. he's just been taking note of everything you've done and how attractive you are when doing them. after he noticed he was thinking these things, he just accepted the fact he had a major crush on you and shrugged it off.
a part of him expected it to happen - how could he not have some sort of romantic feelings for you when you were so witty, strong, and intelligent. he was bound to catch some feelings for you, whether he wanted to or not.
he accepted it really quickly and decided he wanted to make it obvious sooner or later. the fact was he wouldn't know how you felt unless he initiated something.
so as he sat across from you, elbows resting on the table, until he got an idea.
"got somethin'," he said, motioning to his cheek. before you could wipe it off though, he dragged his thumb over your skin and collected the sauce of the food that you were eating onto his digit. he sucked it clean off, maintaining eye contact with you the entire time. "wait, missed a spot, c'mere,"
he leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours in a quick, chaste kiss before smirking at your stunned expression, "got it,"
after that, you obviously questioned him because what the fuck. toji just shrugs, explains how he's liked you for some time and decided to make it known now. he goes on to explain that since you're both adults, you could compromise a mature way of going about your relationship on the off-chance you didn't like him back (he's shitting bricks when he talks about that part though, you just can't tell-)
you return his feelings after getting over the initial shock.
and that was toji's unromantic way of confessing to you, but still, it got the job done and ever since that day the two of you couldn't be happier.
— contrary to popular belief, i think that toji is a big romantic. when he finds the right person, he wants it to be known that he's interested in them, loyal, and a devoted lover. in his own ways, he gives a lot of romantic attention to you and the time you spend together. even if he's dead broke, he'll find a way to make ends meet in making your relationship feel as special as it is to him.
"c'mon, baby," he goads you into grabbing his hand, rolling his eyes when you shoot him a look. "let's go, the reservation isn't gonna be waiting for anyone else but us,"
"yeah, how did you do this though? toji, this place is so expensive, are you sur-"
he kisses you to shut you up, hand caressing your cheek as he speaks to you in a low voice, "i got it all handled, don't worry about it," that translates to you = i pulled a couple of strings by threatening the boss of this place to let us eat here for free. but you couldn't will yourself to care because it was the thought that counts! plus, he went through all that effort just to secure you two a romantic evening together.
so you ruffled his messy dark locks and allowed him to guide you inside the lavish restaurant. he smirked in content, kissing the top of your head before securing you two your promised table.
on your anniversary, he showers you in so much love and affection it's insane. he doesn't have the money to bring about the most lavish celebration, unfortunately, but he does make up for it by being extra doting.
"love you so much," is the first thing he mumbles into your skin. it takes you a second to register why he was being so lovey-dovey, but when you remember it was because the calendar marks two years of officially being together, your heart warms.
toji has a good memory, remembers all the important dates and what you like and don't like. he's got it all stores in his memory under the "everything about [name]" folder there, that has other information such as your food preferences, what you like to wear, what you enjoy watching on TV, etc.
his hands run up and down your sides, pinching your nipple to get you awake and laughing when you smack him with the pillow. "sorry, just wanted to get you up so we don't waste our entire day in bed!"
"what if i wanted to just be in bed with you?" you asked, rubbing your chest with an annoyed look on your face.
"sorry, baby boy, but no can do," toji says, peppering kisses on your face, "got the whole day planned out in my head," you ignore his loving kisses that start trailing to you neck.
"mhm and what's that?"
"it's a surprise, don't ruin it," he warns you in an oddly serious tone, "want to make today special, let me make it special, boy,"
you laugh at his seemingly annoyed tone, but let him have his moment - not pressing for anymore answers.
— not the biggest on public affection, but doesn't hide the fact that he's yours and you're his. always has his arms around your shoulders or waist, sometimes pecks your cheek. but that's as far as it goes with pda. verbally, on the other hand, he's always mentioning you. even in brief interactions with other people, he's slipping mentions of you into conversation with such ease and smoothness.
"will that be all today?" the barista asks, eyeing toji up and down. and he's not a stupid guy, he notices it easily.
so to assert himself, he clears his throat and looks over the menu, "nah, actually, let me get a cinnamon bun for my boyfriend," he says, pulling out his wallet and taking out some cash, "he's been wanting somethin' sweet for a while, so i guess i can treat him to this," he comments, looking back at you with a smile. you were already seated at the table as he ordered, offering him a wave before looking back out the window.
the barista is obviously dejected when he mentions you, but he's nothing but prideful and satisfied. serves her right.
"didn't [name] already tell you we won't be taking the job? we got our entire week already planned out, we can't fit in another mission," toji said over the phone. it was one of the rare instances he was turning down the opportunity to make money, but he didn't feel bad or guilty about it.
you and him had a whole week planned together, it's been in the calendar for months now and he wasn't going to ruin the rare one-on-one time he could have with you by being greedy with some extra cash.
in the past, he might've. but you changed him, in a good way. and he wasn't going to make it seem like he valued cash over you because he definitely didn't.
"i wasn't aware that [name] spoke for the both of you? y'know, if you take him out of the equation, toji, you actually make more money-"
toji almost growled, "he fucking said no, that means i said no, too. don't be an asshole right now or i might really get pissed. from now on, whatever my man says think about it as if he's speaking on behalf of both of us. same goes for me. so listen closely when i say this, cause i'm sure he'd say the same thing to you right now: fuck off!"
he hangs up the phone and tosses it onto the table, rubbing his forehead in annoyance.
"everything alright, babe? you were yelling?" you shout from your shared bedroom and toji visibly relaxes after hearing your voice.
"nah, everythin's alright, doll, don't worry about it," he calls back, kicking his feet up onto the table and spreading his arms against the couch cushions, "hurry your ass down here, though, or else i'm starting without you!"
— huge believer in cuddling, loves, loves just holding you in his arms. it's the one time he really feels as if his stress just washes away. he's a big guy, so he usually just ends up completely blanketing over your own body. but usually, he settles for just being the big spoon and staying satisfied like that. sometimes, though, he will want to just have you completely laid out on top of him as you act as some sort of weighted blanket. that's if he's really, really stressed and just needs to be reminded that you're there for him.
his hands rest on your hips as he's laid flat on his back, holding you in place on top of him. you have been struggling to get comfortable for the past five minutes and he had to bite his tongue from saying a snarky comment to you.
"fuck, toji, it's like i'm sleeping on a rock," you complain, pushing yourself up from his torso and glaring at him, "can't i just sleep next to you like a normal person,"
he keeps his eyes shut, not bothering to wake himself from his semi-sleepy state, "[name], just stay still for a second and you'll eventually get sleepy,"
"easy for you to say when you're on the comfort of the mattress,"
"don't you say my boobs make for good pillows or something," he groans, finally cracking one eye open to weakly glare at you, "just use them as your pillows and count fucking sheep,"
"but your-"
"shh, you big baby, i just need this for tonight," he promptly shuts you up but pushing his finger on your lips. in any other instance, that would've just pissed you off even more, but seeing how genuinely tired and needy he was, you let it slide. just this once.
you settled back on his chest, running your fingers up and down his sides to give some sort of comfort.
"love you, toji," you breathe out, barely loud enough for him to hear.
but he does, and he squeezes your sides to show that he did, kissing the top of your head and whispering it back before he's lulled to his own slumber.
— always thinking about you. he's only concerned with you. every single other person in the world can fuck themselves, he just cares about you and wants to make sure you're safe.
"where's [name]?" were the first words he asked their employer, looking around the office space in search of your h/c hair.
"he just went to get himself some water-" as toji is informed of that, he's standing up out of the seat he was in and is going to leave in search of you. "he should be back in a couple short moments,"
"hm, don't care, i'm going to look for him and then we can start this meeting," toji said, not giving another glance to the guy that was going to give the both of you a job to finish.
oddly enough, the meeting was held in a corporate looking building and toji was concerned on your whereabouts. what if these assholes had some fucked up trick up their sleeve and were going to use you as leverage to get to him? toji wouldn't put it past them, he's messed with more than a couple powerful folks back in his day.
it could bite him in the ass someday and he really didn't want to risk that chance affecting you.
"toji? what are you doing here?" you ask, coming towards him with two paper cups of water in your hands.
"looking for you, babe," he easily responds, looking at the water in interest, "where'd that come from?"
"they had pitchers in their breakroom and i decided-"
"could have poision in them," toji said off handedly, looking at the contents and his face screwing up in distaste, "hold off on drinking it for now, these guys can be unpredictable sometimes,"
taking his warnings seriously, you don't sip from the cup at all and walk back with him to the meeting room. his hand rests on your waist protectively as the two of you walk through the halls, glaring at anyone who stares for a bit too long.
like a personal guard dog, toji is always standing at attention and assuming the worst of people. but don't worry, he doesn't mind. if it means it keeps you safe and in his arms, he'll be as paranoid as one can get and not have an issue with that at all.
— at the end of the day, toji doesn't listen to anyone, but you. it's funny how obediant you can get this absolute unit of man to act. he tries not to make it so obvious, but when he's hanging off of every word you say and acting at your beck and call, it's already obvious to everyone around you where his priorities are at.
"toji, don't touch that - the sign says not to touch,"
"if i wanna touch it, i will," toji says with a shrug and smirk. but then he notices the warning look you give him as his fingers inch closer to the display. he clicks his tongue in annoyance, dropping his hand to his side as he muttering under his breath, "didn't wanna even touch it, anyway, tch,"
or another time when he's giving the waiter an earful for not remembering something in your order. he thinks he's doing you a favor by speaking up for you, but in reality, you just didn't want to make the waiter's life harder than it already is.
"he asked specifically for you guys to put it on the side since he doesn't lik-"
"baby, it's fine, just drop it," you sigh, rubbing your forehead with a tired look in your eyes. he's about to protest, a scowl on his face as he thinks about the waiter incompentence. but with one look from you and a calm, "toji, enough," reaching his ears, he's standing down and shutting up.
the waiter shoots you a thankful look before running off to the kitchen with your plate of food, going off to correct his mistakes.
"couldn't hurt you to speak more nicely to people," you say, grabbing his hand across the table and shooting him a look. he scoffs, taking your hand in his and calming himself down using your touch.
toji only ever listens to one person in his life and it's you. you're just really lucky he loves you so much because if it was any other person, he'd be doing their head in. he sighs, thinking of the affects you've had on him and his own steel, hard heart.
he can't help but be thankful. he kisses the back of your hand silently, squeezing it in his hold once more before shooting you a small, barely noticeable smile.
"if that fuck ass even thinks about looking at you with those puppy dog eyes of his one more time, though, i can't promise i won't nail him right in the face," and there's your familiar, stubborn toji back again, easily threatening a poor guy that's just doing his job.
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sirludox · 6 months ago
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please tell me all about your zosan pony verse i love them!
Oh my god it would be an honour! I'll start off by mentioning that the reason I chose Sanji as a pegasus was I see his more flamboyant personality fitting that better and i just could not imagine a horse wielding 3 swords without some sort of help so I tinkered how unicorn magic works slightly with it being more closely related to mental and physical strength rather than just being a sort of cheat code haha! Also it was fun imagining a more brutish unicorn compared to the usual elegance of one! Zoro did in fact lose his horn with his first meeting of Mihawk! I was debating making him lose it when he lost his eye but I felt like him dedicating himself even more to training and meditation to make up for what he's lost fit better with it occurring much earlier on than randomly off screen like his eye. Sanji also witnessing him lose his horn yet still declare his loyalty and never losing a fight again would push Sanji to join the crew since he cant fly Sanji, like I said, can't fly mostly related to a) the deformed genes from the poison and b) his wings were bound down when he was a kid by Judge while he was imprisoned much like how he had the helmet on. While their growth wasn't affected, having no prior training on top of the messed up genes means as much as he can do with "flying" is gliding off of tall places or high up but even then that's limited. His "sky walk" is still done with his legs like in the original, so while he can technically "fly", he can't feel the wind between his wings like he normally should for having wings and so he often enjoys spreading his wings out on windy days to ease the desire of "freedom"! He uses his wings primarily as he would hands now, using them to carry food and dishes out and express emotions with them, and absolutely hates having them constricted (it begins to freak him out slightly). Sanji then learnt to use his legs (mostly his back ones) for fighting from Zeff (whom im still debating lost a leg or a wing) and the rest is history! These two still bicker and are the exact same as they are in the original, just with the bonus addition of them bonding over them missing their core "features" of their kind, a broken horn and useless wings. They never ever bring these aspects up in a way to offend/insult the other, as they know they're both rather sensitive topics, but they both use what they've lost to their advantage and dont let any of it hold them back Some more unique quirks they have now are:
Sanji preens/grooms his feathers a LOT and takes a lot of care with them. These days (20's), he's allowed Zoro to preen him when he can't from injuries, and Zoro is good with it/surprisingly gentle after learning from Kuina
Unicorns usually rub/touch horns gently in a comforting manner between family or extremely close (wink wink) others, and butting heads/clashing is more aggressive (which is why zosan often bump heads when arguing). As a trade off for the preening Sanji will often gently touch his head to Zoro's as thanks, or when he's in a particularly bad spot (be it physically or mentally) as a way to comfort him without words being needed to be said. Sanji doesn't know the more romantic connotations of it <3
Sanji tends to "fluff up" during preening as subconsciously finding it extremely relaxing and pleasing and Zoro pokes fun at him for it a little but not too much to avoid scaring him away
40 year old Zosan here has Sanji much more comfortable asking Zoro for a preen or "demanding for it" and Zoro finds it "so annoying" but does it anyway (theyre grossly in love)
Sanji will tease Zoro for being so "brute" as a unicorn, and Zoro teases Sanji for being a "dumb peacock"
Sorry for so much of a ramble haha they're just so much fun to work with, and included a couple sketches to kind of go along with things and explore other characters! If you (or anyone) has any other questions I'll be happy to answer ❤️ (sorry if some of this doesnt make sense haha)
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weebsinstash · 1 year ago
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I've talked about romantic/sexual yandere Miguel being goaded on by an alternate of himself or another you, but, I'm also thinking about platonic yandere parental/guardian Miguel getting a little 'push' to realize he wants you to play a more central role in his life, either from being in competition with an alternate of his or outright being told by his alternate that it's what he should do
You're just in the Spider Society minding your own business and you see Miguel talking to, Another Miguel, but this one has glasses or a beauty mark or some distinguishing feature. The two of them are discussing anomalies and "the fate of the multiverse" and other such serious topics when you stroll by, giving a wave and such as hello when the second Miguel actually pauses their conversation to greet you, actually being, well, much like YOUR Miguel with his occasional sarcastic snark but, friendlier, introducing himself to you, shaking your hand, asking you questions like how old you are, how long have you been a Spider, etc, amd you're ready to start cracking jokes about how, maybe you'll start spending time with this new Miguel instead since 'yours' is suddenly so grumpy, when. Oh dear, the awkward thing happens. Here comes the other you, bounding right up to the other Miguel, "Papá, there you are 🥰 this place is like a maze and I got lost looking for you, dont leave me behind again 🥺"
Both you and Miguel are watching your alternates interact, actually silently internally in some weird sort of agreement with "this is kind of weird but also oddly wholesome... what the fuck, why do I want what they have..." but it's just. It's also just a little weird. You're literally watching another you cuddle up to another version of your boss, calling the man their dad, acting like they're legitimately his child, with the other man actually being genuinely caring and considerate back. Eventually in private Dad!Miguel asks Miguel about his relationship with you and is basically met with "what relationship. That's just my coworker" as Dad!Miguel rolls his eyes at his emotionally constipated alternate who's apparently going to need a little encouragement
Part of me is like, what if some bullshit happens like, Dad!Miguel is all "oh yeah well if you have such a handle on things and think they can take care of themself without any support or guidance, what are they doing right now" and Miguel is all huffy and all FINE LETS SEE, IM SURE THEYRE FINE and goes to, use his monitors or whatever to spy on you and, you're having like a mental episode, a real crying session, some real boo hoo sobbing and maybe even cutting yourself as Miguel is "coincidentally" having an epiphany that, hey, maybe you DO need an extra mentor figure in your life... maybe he can... ask you about your day and stuff? Dad!Miguel over here ready to rip his hair out as he realizes your Miguel went through all the second universe stuff and is now an emotionally bottled mess and, in a way needs you as much as you need him
Whether to encourage his alternate or help you since you resemble 'his child', despite all awkward differences, Dad!Miguel sees that you're lonely and struggling and, kinda partially adopts you, becoming something of a mentor, checking in on you, scolding you to est something when his advanced hearing picks up on your stomach growling, making small talk, little things like that, but routinely, becoming a bit of a fixture in your life
Months down the line your Miguel is minding his own business having a pretty ok day and he rounds the corner and. It's Dad! Miguel, convincing you to let him comb your hair because you ran out of the house without doing anything with it first and you've been kind of stressed and tired. Miguel just starting to kind of feel what can only be identified as envy and jealousy as he watches Dad!Miguel spending time with you, "so, are you graduated by now? My child (the other you) is still in university right now" "oh no, I'm not really doing college" "what, but you're so smart! I think you can do anything you put your mind to--"
Miguel turns his back and next time he turns around, Dad!Miguel is getting you gifts for your birthday and it turns out he regularly visits you. The original man's strolling through the lobby and suddenly he sees you with his alternate that he's really starting to hate and, are you speaking Spanish? Since when did you learn Spanish? Did he TEACH you? Have you been spending so much time together that the other him even had that opportunity?
He's just standing there watching Dad!Miguel like, braid your hair or help clean your glasses or do something that's like, platonic but personal, caring, affectionate, and suddenly your Miguel is having the realization, "did this bitch just steal you right under my nose. Did he just baby code MY baby 😤"
Miguel overhears you happily call his alternate Tío and, that's it, he gets so mad he confronts the other him about it in private basically then and there, the other man basically just like "well clearly YOU weren't giving them the support they needed--" and proceeding to give advice on how to get close to you, things you're stressed about and struggling with, things you were too shy and scared to open up about to the original Miguel or anyone who isn't a trusted friend
An alternate version of the YouTwo disaster where YouTwo wants to steal your life because you "stole their dad" when Dad!Miguel spends time with you and they assume they're being replaced out of jealousy, or maybe he even outright wants you for himself, or maybe Dad!Miguel outright meets his unfortunate end in an unrelated villain thing and YouTwo comes to steal YOUR "dad". YouTwo who's more unhinged than ever because their Miguel kind of "broke them in" to be their loving little child and doesn't handle either being replaced or losing the only loved one and source of support they cared about
Of course this is to say, it would DEFINITELY be "unfortunate" if you and Dad!Miguel got so, so close and, then suddenly the man dies and is violently ripped from your life just when you're starting to heal and be happy again and, suddenly you're so heartbroken and vulnerable and, THIS is the moment when your Miguel finally steps up to the plate to truly take care of you amd fully assimilate into your life. You're breaking down sobbing, literally the kind of crying where you can't even stand, you just collapse, and, here he is to pick you up and hold you, embrace you, shoosh you gently and rub your back and let you cry while he helps you feel safe again. He's sorry he's late, but he's here now, so let Papá give you nice big hugs while you cry and then take you back home, ok? His home. Technically YOUR home now, that the two of you share. You'll get served all your favorite foods and made sure you're looked after and, when its time for bed and you get those violent nightmares and images of how your beloved Tío was killed right in front of you and can't manage to sleep, your Papá is there to help hold you and comfort you until you're finally softly snoring in his arms. he looks at you, how heartbroken and, in his eyes, helpless you are, and vows that if anyone ever tries to hurt, or wrong you, or some punk who doesn't deserve you tries to taint your purity, that he'll rip them apart like a wild animal
After all, that's just what good fathers do
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gomzdrawfr · 1 month ago
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want to join the fandom cause it seems fun seeing fanarts and you and others interacting but I don't know how...and with the whole ai thing im scared...
my advice: just do it
really! sometimes all you really need is a leap of faith, and that was exactly how I dropped into the cod fandom. When I joined the ghoap discord server I talked to one of the artist I really like and respected from my lurking time (hi @bressynonym) aaaand the rest is history
I didnt know how to draw properly, nor digitally, all I did was scribbling on OneNote (yeah!) and rambled about cod characters, it is daunting and it is scary to interact but after a while? you may just be able to find someone to brainrot together with
start small, like commenting, reblogging, talking, chatting- doesn't have to be towards artist/writers, it could be the art/fic enjoyers!
you need to put yourself out there if you want something
as to if you want to start in the fandom as a creator, here's some more tips (which are all based on my experience, I am no pro at doing this, hell Im still learning myself, and I am by no means speaking these on behalf on others!)
establish a goal: what are you making? fandom based? original creations?
as with starting new, everything may take a while for stuff to happen, you'll feel like you're speaking to the void at times (esp with original arts, but do know that your stuff do get perceive by others as time goes, I would advise to draw fandom stuff as a beginning to get that boost going if you want! or else it's going to be quite hard to get things rolling)
imo this is hardest part of any new creator, you'll have to bear with it and try not to give up (but I understand how incredibly demotivating it could get, there were times when I stopped posting about Raven entirely, but eventually I post it anyway cuz surely someone out there will like them, it just takes a lot of patiences and perseverance)
btw, engagement can also vary from time to time, you may be booming for a bit, then suddenly you dont, it is a cycle that will bound to happen
take rest regularly, and I mean a break from social media because numbers, discourse and everything can get to you, very quickly (I cannot emphasise this enough)
the numbers are not worth it over your mental health (comes with practice to really solidify this thought)
study the algorithm (pain): see what other creators are doing to get where they are, what tags are they using in their post? what features/niche do people like?(this is, if you really want to grab some form of engagement, bcuz reminder in the end you are creating art for yourself first!)
example: I think posts would get more reach if you tag it with the ship name first, followed by the characters' name (doesn't work all the time tho)
that's the thing about algorithm, it is ever-changing, and you'll have to learn to adapt with it when it does!
expanding on that, studying algorithm could be about ships (for example, ghostsoap is most popular in the fandom), or really good rendered art/flashed out fic that leaves your jaw on the floor, or ships that gets lesser attention in general which puts you, who make content about them, easier to be brought into the light (like Faralex)
bUT, it can also be personality!
(again, not saying this is meant for everyone and strictly from my own experience + what I observe) for me, I made up the lack of my art by establishing a personality: a wild panda who yaps about price and their oc and also kinda everywhere in the place (just like this post LOL), OR you're the person who named themselves after Soap's ash particle number OR you're the one who likes bottom Ghost- literally anything goes, you want to make an impression in different ways, some more funny/goofier than others but it works (be mindful and stay respectful tho, dont wanna be the asshole in the fandom now do ya?)
efforts ≠ engagement (not all the time, but most time) and this is a fact. Sometimes, you can't expect a piece you did for 10+ hours to get thousands views and likes, especially in a fandom space. You need to understand algorithm is that wonky. (very disheartening, but again, you make the art for you and the few others who genuinely likes them, and those people can go a long way) be mentally prepared for such events, and try not to beat yourself up too much for it
ultimately tho, do it, do it scared but do it anyways and again, draw the things that bring you joy, I hope these could be helpful in some ways!
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nekropsii · 1 year ago
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im thinking about the relationship between kankri and porrim because its just so fucking WEIRD like theyre obviously important to eachother or care about eachother to some extent but we dont really know why?? like they dont seem to get along very well
she patronizes him constantly (which is VERY loaded considering they lived on fucking beforus) and ignores his boundaries (calling him patronizing nicknames he doesnt like, wiping his face while he tried to push her off) and he constantly makes insensitive bitchy bigoted comments that go against all of her values and make her angry
and theres not the same dynamic dolorosa and signless had where she raised him like theyre the same age so why do they even talk to eachother?? what is their relationship?? like were they childhood friends or something?? itd make sense if they were both a little different as kids and therefore got along better but then why do they still talk to eachother when they really dont now ITS SO WEIRD
It's... Complicated. They go way back, as far as I can tell.
The way I see it, they do not have a "Mother and Son" relationship- I find that most who assert this often place far too much maturity onto Porrim, who is literally 19 years old. It's more like an Adoptive/Found Sibling relationship between someone with a severe case of Eldest Daughter Syndrome and the social conditioning of a higher-end Midblood on Beforus, and someone with a chronic case of Only Child and the social conditioning of a Mutant Lime on Beforus. The relationship makes more sense to me when you view it this way. It's just... A fraught sibling relationship, formed under societal pressures we can't even fathom. Porrim Maryam, trained by society to cull those beneath her, trying hard not to, and for the most succeeding outside of someone very close to her, and Kankri Vantas, culled and isolated his whole life, becoming a total suck-up to the deeply misogynistic, ableist, hemoloyal culling system as both a method of self defense and as a wielding of the only weapon he really knows. It was used against him all the time, and it works, doesn't it? If sucking up to Able-Bodied Male Highbloods and ridiculing everyone beneath that golden standard is the best way to ensure safety, then he's gonna do it. He's essentially a lifelong voter for the Leopards Eating People's Faces Party.
Ultimately, I think what keeps Porrim by his side is that... I think she believes in him. It's like watching yourself lose your sibling to the Alt-Right Pipeline. I think she thinks he doesn't actually believe most of what he's saying, and that this is all deeply reflexive. She's smart enough to recognize the real systemic issues at play here, and that he's essentially caught in chains between 5 different machines that all want him dead. And she's right. When you actually read the shit Kankri's saying, it becomes almost immediately apparent that he's spouting bullshit, and that he absolutely knows this. I think what keeps Kankri by her side is that he knows she cares about him. There isn't any denying it. She might infringe on boundaries, or be generally annoying to him, and keeps doing that frustrating little thing called seeing through his and everyone else's bullshit and calling them out on it- not just including but especially his- but she cares. I think he knows that at the end of all things what he'd have left is her. Is this to say that if you got Kankri to grow a spine and genuinely believe in things that aren't spoonfeedings of the latest Conservative Highblood Talking Point/Psy-Op, he'd be a good person? Hell no. No way. He has a raging savior complex and is way too eager to throw other people under the bus and insult/ridicule them to their faces. He's an asshole. Just completely slimy.
But, again, sibling relationships know no bounds. This kind of dynamic just feels so... Realistic to me. The way their relationship is so strained but still so strong and ongoing just feels so human. I don't know. This is pretty meandering, I just think about them a lot.
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st4rgzer · 1 year ago
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Can you write a about the reader loving Matt sm but knowing he doesn’t like her back. Liek don’t have a super happy ending but also don’t have a super sad one. Do it inspired by me and …
UNREQUITED (matt sturniolo)
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summary: the reader experiences some unresponsive feelings from a special someone
genre: angst
cw: taylor swift references maybe…? Is that a warning? Other than that I really don’t think theres much
a/n: as always, @iha8you ‘s request, ly, also dw you’ll get him🙏
This winter had been hell for me, it was always my favorite holiday, the cool air, snow, when it rained and I got to stay home playing boardgames with my mum, or I finally got to read that book that had been collecting dust on my shelf for ages now that it was dark and rainy. No, none of it this year. Every time I hung out with him I held my breath, in fear I’ll do something wrong, take too much space, become too much of a liability. Its stupid, just stupid, I’m his best friend, known him since i was 16 years old, but he seemed so much more older, and wiser.I belittle myself next to him, instead of just letting go, I take a mental note of every little gesture he does that correlates in any way to me, every choice of words, I save them to then divulge them later. It’s draining, not knowing if its just all in your head. If you’ve got it wrong…
“y/n? Hellooo, are you there” i snapped out of my meditative state.I was cross legged on my bedroom floor with two of my closest friends, I didnt even remember what we were talking about anymore.
“yeah sorry i was just distracted” I sighed tying my hair back into a low ponytail and resting my hands on my knees
“we were talking about Matt? Y’know you actually have a chance with him, did you see the way he talked to you earlier?” My friends were only feeding into my delusions, the other nodded in agreement. Even if he did actually see me like that, i dont know what i would do, we’ve been friends since highschool, everything would just be too weird and messy, it wouldn’t be right, no, not with me, not with him.
“No, guys, stop, you’re all just talking nonsense and it just makes everything worse” I groaned, placing my head between my hands.
“C’mon, who could ever leave you?” She says giggling, looking over at my other friend, it wasn’t funny, not in that moment at least. I felt despaired, I know it’s obvious I like him, maybe no one actually takes it seriously when i throw in some extra compliments once in a while of some flirty remarks, but I never try to hide it, except the real thing of course. I know my love should be celebrated, I shouldn’t settle for someone who just tolerates it, but I keep going back to the same thing, always, no matter how many people I see, no matter how many excuses I make to not hang out, its like a moth to a flame, I know im bound to get burnt, trust me. My friends keep convincing me, I feel petty having to listen to them try and make me feel better. Sometimes I come close to actually getting serious then I just think its a waste of time, he just always assumes im fine when my eye contact becomes non existent and my words get mixed up, I dont think he notices it at least, I dont think he ever notices. I guess this means im just doomed, It doesn’t matter how many times my friends reassure me, how many “glances” i pick up from him, Im never going to be one of his main concerns, unrequited. Im always just dimly lit, just enough. I should start trying to accept, settle, “always the bridesmaid, never the bride”.
a/n: this is kind of sht i wrote this at 1:00am, I’ll write more with requests🙏😊😊
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Text
NO PLACE LIKE HOME pt:4
WARNING: 18+ minors dni, murder, stalking, creepy, kidnapping, 
NOT PROOF READ. 
i put my moonlightussy into this 
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“ i dont want to go to U.A anymore” you said shuffling your food around your plate with a fork. “What? You love U.A” your mom said in shock. “And stop playing with your food. I worked hard to make this meal and also worked hard to get you into U.A” 
You looked up at the clock on the wall only to see that it was only 6:30 p.m. The day seriously just wasn’t ending quick enough. More silence filled the air, other than the sound of your mothers fork scraping the plate as she ate. So many emotions went through you as you remembered your experience at school today and the experiences everyday since you found out that three of your teachers are bound to you. 
You rolled your eyes and slowly pushed your plate away. “It’s not enjoyable anymore mom. They prohibit me most of the time from hero training, and give me unnecessary detention. They are narcissistic, obsessive, possessive-” “STOP THAT” your mom cut in. “that is certainly not true. Your grades are amazing and you are getting detention because you are skipping classes!” 
You stood up and walked away from the table. “That was one time!” she finished her last bit of food before collecting both of the plates and heading towards the kitchen to put them in the sink. “It doesnt matter y/n. You should continue to be in U.A. I am not taking you out. END OF STORY!” 
You rolled your eyes and huffed, stomping away and going to your room. You flopped on the bed and looked at your phone only to see almost 50 messages from the trio. You threw your phone as hard as you could and watched it bounce off the wall and bust into pieces. Closing your eyes and rolling over, you went to sleep. 
BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP
You groggily wiped your eyes and yawned. You slammed your hand on the stop button of the alarm next to your bed and you reached over to grab your phone only not to see where it would usually be in the mornings. Looking over, you remember what you did to it last night before going to sleep. You got ready for school and left the broken phone on the ground and left the house making sure to avoid your mother. 
Arriving at U.A was depressing. Mostly just pep talking yourself into just accepting that this is your new life. Upon entering the building you happened to run into All might. “Oh! Hey ms. y/n” you looked up at him and shrugged. “You didn't see my messages, is everything ok? You shrugged and began walking away. “My phone broke last night.” All might turned to you and a light bulb lit up in his head. “I could get you a new one.” you rolled your eyes and continued walking. “Im good” He ignored the other students trying to get his attention and jogged up to you. “Please, I'm sure you need a phone and it will be no cost to you.” He feels excited because this is finally his time to provide for you. 
“Whatever.” you said as you waved him off and walked to your homeroom. 
“Shota looked up at you from his laptop as he seen you coming in. “hello there darling.” he frowned on the inside when he wasnt met with any response. “You know i texted you yesterday. The least my baby can do is respond.” you looked up in annoyance while unpacking your things for the day. “My phone broke last night.” shota leaned back in his chair and responded quickly “I can get you a new one baby.” you rolled your eyes. “Dont you need to save up money and provide for your husband?” Shota scoffed playfully at your response. 
 “Sweetheart its fine, i have more than enough money to get you the newest phone that just came out. Besides, it’s my job to provide for you.” 
Hizashi came waltzing in after shota said that and joined the convo while walking towards you and doing playful finger guns. “Whats up my babies?” He kissed you on the temple and wrapped an arm around your shoulders. “y/n broke her phone so i opted to get her a new one, she’s declining.” Hizashi looked at you and gasped. “Your phone broke? No wonder you didn't respond to us last night. You should let us get you a new phone babes. It's our job to provide for ya. Ya dig?” 
“All might already offered to get a new phone for me.” the couple visibly frowned. Hizashi looked up at shota and cringed in irritation upon hearing the news. Shota waved a hand at him dismissing his anger as a silent way to tell him to calm down. “Let him get the phone.” 
After class and all the students left, shouta kissed you on the lips and was surprised that you kissed back. shota looked at your form walking away in awe. Hizashi came walking in and seen shota all giddy and smiley. “Whats got you all sunshine and rainbows?” shota looked at his husband and smiled. “She kissed me back.” hizashi looked shocked and nodded. “Thats great babe.” 
Shota smiled to himself and spoke. “Look zashi, i know you dont like toshinori right now and it’s understandable. But just let him try, ok?” hizashi nodded and understood. After saying that toshinori came in looking for y/n. “Hey what’s up?” hizashi said trying not to sound awkward. “Nothing much just looking for y/n, i got her a new phone.” shota looked shocked. “That quick?” toshinori shrugged. “Yeah i guess. I dont have a tight schedule today and i won’t be busy until 3pm, so i have a lot of free time.” shota looked at the phone toshi was holding. “Let me see.” toshi handed it over. It was the newest phone model that came out this year. “Let me make some changes to it first before we give it to her.” shota said walking towards his desk with it. 
“Like what?” toshinori asked. “Just some spyware and secret controls so we can see what she’s doing and who she’s talking to. You know. For safety.” Toshinori nodded and agreed. “Good idea.” shota took out the phone and turned it one and started setting it up. “Dont worry, i’ll give it to her at the end of the day, knowing that you have a tight schedule and all towards dismissal.” toshinori smiled. “Ok thank you so much” and walked away. 
The bell rang loudly for dismissal and all of the kids got up and shuffled out, like they’ve never seen daylight before. Finally school is over for the day. you sighed in relief. You have spent all day low-key dodging the soulmates. After packing your things and getting up you raced out of the class and blended in with the crowd, Only poking your head up above the sea of kids to see if one of your soulmates (old enough to be your father) were around. 
You were walking like a speed demon and spent too long staring back above the crowd to notice anyone in front of you. Turning your head to finally face forward, only to yelp in surprise when you face plant into a chest that feels like a sturdy brick wall. You slowly pulled your head away from the chest. The more you pulled back the more of the color black you saw. Immediately knowing who it was and sighed in irritation. 
“L/N” you looked up to see Shota Aizawa. His raven hair floating in the air and his eyes a bright crimson red. Irritation painted all over his face. He grabbed your arm and pulled you out of the crowd and aside into his classroom. Closing the door and locking it in the process. 
“I called you over a million times.” he said, turning to face you. He couldn't help but feel butterflies in his stomach. He’s so in love with you. 
You noticed him masking his nervousness with irritation. He approached you with a new phone and handed it to you. You looked down in surprise and cautiously grabbed the box. 
 “I told you all might would give me one.” Shota let out a sigh. “ call him toshinori outside of class and he did, I'm just handing it to you because he has a tight schedule.” You opened the box and took a look at the phone. “It's already set up?” Shota was heading towards his desk to sit down. “Yep, your welcome.” he mumbled while shuffling papers around his desk. “thanks i guess.”  you said shyly while putting it in your backpack. You wanted nothing more than to get away. 
As you were heading towards the door, shota spoke up. “Hey, why dont you help me grade papers?” you didnt turn to look at him as you spoke. “I have loads of homework to do, sorry” he stood up and walked to the side of his desk and pulled out a chair that belonged to your desk. You fucking hated that he moved your desk so close to him that its literally on the side of his desk. “You can do it here, i’ll even help you, sweety” you huffed in defeat and headed to sit down. He smiled and kissed your temple as you sat down. 
You played with your thumbs as you watched him sit down and start grading papers and type away at his computer. He looked down at you. “Well are you gonna get started?” you snapped out of it and got out your homework and started on it. After an hour, hizashi came knocking on the door and shota got up and walked towards the door unlocking it. You heard them speaking quietly to each other as you did your homework. You were paying close attention to your homework and trying not to look away, only to notice a tall figure wearing tight black leather pants, jacket, and boots come into view and coming closer. The sound of chains clanking on his suit every time he took a step. 
You flinched when the sound of a chair being pulled across the floor happened suddenly. The screeching sound only gets closer. In your peripheral vision you see hizashi pull up a chair and sit next to you. He’s sitting so close to you, its almost like your both sitting in the same chair. He leans over and you watch as green orbs peer through his glasses as he looks at what you're working on. The smell of his cologne is strong and intoxicating. You hate him, but fuck he smelled good. Little did you know, he wore it just for you. He ditched the original scent that he normally wore when he met you and started looking into the more expensive stuff, to really get you going. You hate to admit that it fucking works. You were too zoned out to realize that shota and zashi were speaking to you. You couldn’t help but drop your head down and sniff him. 
“This is some stuff that i can help you with, songbird, that Letter should go there and this letter should go he-woah” zashi froze as you buried your face in his neck and took long inhales while gripping his bicep. Shota and hizashi locked eyes. Hizashi’s face was full of confusion and excitement. Same for shota. You wrapped your arms around Hizashi and buried your face further into his neck. The feeling of his warm skin calmed your every nerves. But this makes no sense. You shouldn’t like him. Hizashi realized that you were trying to bring him closer, so he picked you up out of his chair and held you in his chair. 
Shota smiled as you clung to his husband like a koala. It’s amazing that he took off his speaker and let his hair down. His long blond hair falling over his shoulders. He looked fine as fuck with his hair down. His gloved hands rubbed your back soothingly. You didn’t realize that you started crying. He held your head and rubbed your back. “Shhh, its ok songbird, its ok” 
The war inside your head was loud. Both sides clashed. ‘I love him, I HATE HIM’ 
You started beating his chest and he grabbed your wrist and held you tighter. 
After you calmed down he held you for awhile more. “We should head out, yeah?” Aizawa said softly while organizing his papers and getting his things together. His husband nodded while grabbing your things and putting them in your bag while his other hand held you. You got up off of his lap and avoided eye contact and grabbed your things. “We’ll take you home sweetheart” aizawa insisted while he grabbed your hand. They both held your hands and walked through the halls of U.A. they were free to do that now, since no one was here to see it. 
‘I wanna leave, i wanna leave’ 
Walking past the windows, you noticed that the sun was setting. Your mother must be worried sick. Exiting the building hizashi got a call and he slung his bag over his shoulder like a purse and used his now free hand to answer the call. You could hear your mothers voice on the other end. “Oh! Shes with me ma’am. She stayed after class for tutoring, I'm dropping her off at home.” you could hear the sound of relief in your mothers voice. And her thanking god. He said his good bye’s and ended the call. 
Once you all approached the vehicle they let go of your hands. Shota went to the drivers seat and hizashi opened the backset door for you and guided you in. He grabbed shota’s and his bags and put them beside you in the backseat and closed the door. The outside of the car was a nice gray and the seats were soft. Shota started the car and the car started moving. You couldn’t help but look at shota’s forearms as he rolled up his hero suit sleeves and gripped the steering wheel. The muscles of his forearms were hypnotizing. You jumped in surprised when you seen his eyes on you in the rearview mirror. You didn't notice him smirk as he turned his attention back to the road. You looked over at the black bags that they take to work with them and noticed a phone sticking out of Shota’s bag lighting up. You got nosy and looked over to see that his phone was unlocked and open. He must have forgotten to shut it off. There was an app open and there was a nice, huge, and charming house on the screen, But it seemed to be far from the city. 
They must be looking to move. WONDERFUL. 
“Sweetheart, you being nosy?” You froze and looked up only to see Shota looking at you from the rearview. “N-no.” He smirked. “We’re going to move” he said with a touch of excitement and nervousness in his voice as he stared ahead, only to peak at you every once in awhile to study your expression. Before he could continue, hizashi added in. “It's gonna be great! A nice, huge, breathtaking house, away from the loud city! You're gonna love it!” He yelled in excitement while waving his hands around. He froze when his husband glared at him. Uh oh, the cats out of the bag. “What do you mean I’m going to like it?” 
Shota sighed and just told you the truth, might as well. No one would believe you if you said anything anyways. ”Toshinori, zashi, and I are getting married and moving out to a nice house away from the city with you, and eventually adding you to the marriage as well.” You zoned out with panic. The seatbelt felt tighter than usual. You let down the window for air, but it wasn't helping. The car ride seemed longer.  “Its ok songbird” hizashi reached a reassuring hand back to rest on your leg. “Sho maybe we should stop to let her get some air.” 
“We’re almost there zashi.” Once they stopped at your address, You raced out of the car and into your house. They didnt even get to say goodbye first. You raced up to your room, completely dodging your mom, and used your new phone to call izuku and freak out. Little did you know that the two men got out of the car and were invited in by your mother. Izuku picked up your call worried and you vented to him. He was just as worried as you. Mid freak out, you heard talking inside your house. You set the phone down and left your room to peek into the living room, only to find hizashi and shota sitting at the dining room table, talking to your mother as she made them tea.
Your heart jumped to your throat and you tried to sneak back to your room. “y/n?” shouta called out. “ I have to go to the bathroom!” you called racing back to your bedroom before they can call you to come hang out.
“Hello? Hello? y/n?“ the faint voice of Izuku called out on the other end of the phone from across the room where you left it.  You picked up the phone “You have to get me out of here.” 
“y/n? y/n?” your mother knocked on your door after checking the bathroom. She rattled the doorknob only to see that it was locked. After another 5 minutes of trying to talk to you, she went and got a spare key to open your door. She opened the door and saw that you weren't there. “Y/N??” your stuff was gone and your window was wide open. “Everything alright?” Shouta asked peeking his head in your room, only to see that you were gone. He put the pieces together and noticed that you ran away. “Why would she run away?” your mother was freaking out in tears and picking up her phone to call everyone she knows to make sure they keep an eye out. “Ma’am im sure she’ll return…maybe she went for a walk?” hizashi added in unsure. 
“With her stuff?” shouta glared at his husband. “It’s not safe out there!” your mother said in pure panic. “We’ll go look for her ma’am” hizashi said in reassurance. 
Izuku and you were racing down the interstate. Your in the passenger seat freaking out and trying to breathe. “It’s ok, just breathe.” izuku said rolling down your window a smidge. He’s the only one that believes you. This feels like a movie. You and a boy packing your things and running away together. You cant say that you never noticed that Izuku had feelings for you. He looked at you with a face of reassurance and smiled at you. Your heart warmed. Finally arriving at the airport you both grabbed your stuff from out of the car and went in. Thank god izuku had an app that allowed him to book flights quickly. Real life saver. 
You both boarded the plane quickly. The trip was so anxiety-inducing. When you both arrived there, Izuku booked you both a hotel room. You unlocked the door and threw yourself onto the bed and screamed into a pillow. “Hey, hey its alright.” Izuku rubbed your back. “Your safe now.” You took some deep breathes and looked out of the window and noticed that it was dark out. “What time is it?” You questioned izuku. He looked at his phone and answered. “9:37 pm” 
You thought about your mother and started panicking. “It’s ok, we’re here now.” he reassured you. You nodded in agreement and laid down and tried to get some rest. Izuku turned off the lights and watched some television. Turning to your side you could see the light of the tv on the walls. There was only one bed, so He was on the other side of you. After closing your eyes and breathing to calm your nerves, you finally went to sleep. 
Little did you know that shota and Hizashi knew exactly where you were. 
“Hey, time to wake up.” Izuku light shook you awake. You sat up and rubbed you eyes. “You hairs a mess.” he giggled. “What time is it?” he looked at his phone. “12:46 pm, we slept in pretty good.” you nodded. “Im going to head downstairs to get us some coffee’s, ok?” you nodded and he headed out. 
It’s officially been 24 hours and the heroes can finally take your missing persons case. Shota volunteered to take your case and Toshinori was assigned to help him. Perfect. Hizashi stayed behind to purchase the house and get everything set up. They werent ready to purchase the house or get married yet. But you left and they panicked. They cant have you run away like that. You’ll be safe with them. 
While you were gone they got the ball rolling. They took all of their savings and put it towards the marriage and house. Toshinori now sports an engagement ring on his finger. He was just as worried for your safety as the others were.  He thanked the gods that he was assigned to your case. 
Shota and toshinori walked into the office so they can be given instructions on the case. Toshinori was in his all might form and had an intimidating look on his face. Pure anger and worry. But tried his best to mask it with a smile. There was a killer on the loose and hasn’t been caught yet. Those kids are normally kidnapped and found in america. Shota brought that up and made a good point. They agreed and Shota and toshinori were assigned to take the case to america first, which is great because thats exactly where you were. After being given the instructions, they both boarded a private jet that was given to them and headed towards america. Shota and toshinori constantly checking your location. They thanked the gods together that with the jet, they would reach you within a couple of hours.  
You sipped your coffee that izuku gave you and thanked him. After your cup of coffee you sighed. “So what now?” izuku looked at you and shrugged “i dont know, maybe we can go out and explore.” you shook your head, too afraid to go outside. “Nah. I think i wanna stay in here just for today.” he nodded in understanding and turned on the tv and handed you the remote. 
You spent the next 6 minutes looking for a channel but nothing was really peaking your interest. 
You both spent a good couple of hours watching tv, until you got board and looked over to the window to see two men approaching the building. Your heart raced. They look like shota and the skinny toshinori. You closed your eyes and breathed to calm yourself down. 
“It’s not them, it’s not them, i’ts not them.” you whispered to yourself. Izuku looked at you confused. Before he could speak, a knock at the door erupted through the room. They weren’t nice knocks, very impatient, angry knocks. 
Your panic rose and izuku put a hand on your shoulder and shushed your panic. He got up and opened the door, only for shota to push him out of the way and walk in. They were both delusional. They thought you were kidnapped, and non of this is your fault, You’d never run away from them right? 
You jumped out of bed and to the corner of the room in shock, only to watch a huge, tall, hulking figure, that you know too well, bow his head down to fit through the doorway, walking in behind shota. He must’ve turned into his all might form in the hall before entering the room. Anger and worry clear as day on his face. Shota was dealing with Izuku on the other side of the room, getting really close to his face and gripping his shirt, Whispering profanities and threats in his ear. It’s hard to hear from the corner of the room.
Your attention snapped to toshinori when he spoke to you.  “y/n pack your things.” you shook your head and all might sighed began packing them for you. “I know your scared, but do not worry, Because I AM HERE.” He zipped your bag closed and approached you slowly. He doesnt think for a second that your scared of him. He believes that your scared of izuku. His hulking figure crouched down to come face to face with you. The hand not holding your bag, comes up to brush the hair out of your face and wipe your tears. He whispers calmly to you “it’s all ok now, i am here.” he rubs your arm and shushes your cries. “It’s ok y/n, im taking you home now, where you’ll be safe, sweet pea.” 
Toshinori looks over to shota who is busy with izuku. “Sho” toshinori calls out to catch his attention. Shota looks over, and the pair nods at each other. They must have a plan of some sort. Toshinori grabs your hand and begins to guide you out of the room. You're hesitant and try to stand your ground. He looks at you reassuringly. “It’s ok now, you're safe with me, shota is taking care of him.” he really believes that you're scared of izuku hurting you if you leave. Shota notices and comes over to you and kisses your forehead, and plucks a hair from your head. “Go baby” he whispers to you calmly. You're still hesitant. They think you're too scared to move. Toshinori takes his free arm and swoops down, and in one swift move you’re on Toshinori’s hip like a baby. He holds your tight and begins to walk out of the door. 
Tears fill your eyes as you look back and see shota staring at you lovingly, as izuku is behind him on the ground. Closing your eyes and breathing  you look forward and watch as your carried out of the building with a strong securing arm around you. Confusion fills you as toshinori walks behind the building quickly and puts you back on your feet. He looks at you before speaking. “Can i trust you to stay by my side? I’m turning to weak form” you look at him and barely above a whisper you ask “why?” he looks at you after poofing to his weak form. Smoke fills the air around you both as he coughs and grabs your hand and begins walking. “Because im not fucking around right now, I dont need attention on us when im in my All Might form.” he grumbles. Bony fingers gripping tighter around your hand as he guides you to the car that drove both him and shota there. You look up to his bony face and see that theres a dead serious look on his face. Theres no point in running. Even in his small form he could easily catch you. Dont mistake his skinny arms for being weak and frail. They may be twigs but they can still break every bone in your body on a power level people could never comprehend. He only calls it his “weak” form because it has a slightly lower power level than his bigger form. 
As you both approach the black car, a man steps out of it. A professional looking man, wearing an expensive suit. He approaches the both of you and rounds the car, opening the car door for you both. Toshinori nods a ‘thank you’ and the man nods back, while taking your bag from toshinori’s hands and letting toshinori get in beside you, shutting the car door. You watch in the rearview mirror from the backseat as the man rounds the car again and opens the trunk and puts your belongings in there. The car bounces a little from the loud ‘thunk’ of the trunk being closed. The man walks past your window and opens his door and gets in. He looks in the rearview mirror and looks at toshinori. “Where to sir?” toshinori squeezes your hand reassuringly and speaks. “Back to the airport.” the man nods and follows instructions, starting the car and beginning the journey there. 
The car ride was silent, except for the occasional coughing fit toshinori has. His hand resting on your thigh, lightly squeezing here and there. He notices your anxiety and he turns on the tv screen that was back there. Its a high end car. “Here, watch something.” he says to you. You turn your attention to the tv screen and watch whats on it. Occasionally changing the channel until it landed on a animal documentary. You watched as the baby cats were shown on the screen. It did little to ease your nerves, but at least it did something. “We’re here” toshnori said as the car parked at the airport. The driver rounded the car and opened your doors. When you exited your side, toshinori quickly rounded the car and grabbed your hand so you wouldn’t run away. He grabbed the bag that the driver handed to him and thanked him while turning into his all might form. In another swift move, you were once again on toshinoris hip. He then jumped high into the sky until he reached the destination of the airport he wanted. It was terrifying being so high. You couldn't help but hold on tight and scream. He shushed you gently as you both landed. You were at the privet jet that was assigned to both toshinori and shota. He turned to his small form and boarded it with you. The journey felt like it lasted forever. He offered drinks and occasional board games to play. You ignored him. He lets it slide, thinking that you're still processing everything that happened when you were “kidnapped” by izuku. You look out of the window when he reaches across the small table you both were sitting at and intertwined his fingers with yours. Occasionally rubbing his thumb on your hand lovingly. You cringed as your finger could feel the ring on his finger. The ring that shota and hizashi placed there. 
Finally landing in japan and going for another agonizing car ride to the new house. Constantly rejecting toshi’s offers for snacks and drinks when you make break stops. Toshinori is very persistent unfortunately. Setting aside the water he gave you and closing your eyes, you sighed. “Should drink that, its good for you” He mumbled as he took a sip of his own. Ignoring him, you  fell asleep and were woken up an hour later by huge gates opening for the car you and toshi were in after the driver put his ID in and was approved. There were vibrant, tall, green trees for miles. Your attention flew to what was behind the miles of trees, A tall brick wall, surrounding the property. The place was huge. The driveway was at least 5 minutes long before reaching the house itself. The front yard was practically a field. A Huge garden in the front yard, along the house. The house was big enough that it looked like it should have an elevator inside. 
Hizashi came out onto the porch excited. Uhauls were everywhere and men were carrying things into the house. You took some deep breaths as you got closer to the house. The driver parked outside and opened your doors. Hizashi was ecstatic as he approached the car, watching you step out. You looked across the car to see that toshi was stretching with his arms in the air, and then taking your bag from the drivers hands with a ‘thank you’. 
Hizashi and the driver nodded to each other in thanks and the driver got back in and drove off. 
“My baby!” hizashi squealed while trapping you in a tight, suffocating embrace. He grabbed your shoulders and looked you over with a smile. You also took the time to look at him. He was wearing casual clothes for once. His hair in a loose bun and wearing casual glasses. He wore a white and gray flannel shirt that was rolled up to his elbows, with a tight, white shirt underneath that illuminated his abs pretty well, and Light gray jeans, with a casual black belt, and black boots. You also took the time to notice that he had little earrings. You looked at his forearm and noticed that he had a tattoo for shota on it. It said “Shota” on it with a symbol under it that looked like his hero scarf. 
“Lets bring ya in yeah?” he said happily as he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and guided you up the porch steps and into the house. You looked back and seen expensive cars sitting in the huge driveway, at least 4 of them. You weren't surprised to see a whole team of people there decorating and setting up the house. Hizashi paid them well and also paid them to keep their mouths shut about you. He guided you to the huge kitchen. 
“Want something?” he asked as he opened the very expensive fridge and bent over inspecting the inside of it. He looked back at you and frowned when you shook your head. He shrugged and grabbed sparkling water and handed it to you anyway. You grabbed it hesitantly. “Why?” you asked. They looked at each other before answering. “Isn’t it obvious? Your safe with us” hizashi said like it was the most obvious thing in the entire world. “I want to go home.” toshinori sighed at your response and added in. “your already home. Your going to be here with Hizashi, Shota, and I” he said rubbing your back. “No, no, no, no what about my life? What about school? What about my mother?” you asked frantically while stepping back away from them. Hizashi rounded the counter and followed you.
 “Hey hey hey hey, it’s ok. No need to freak yourself out there songbird, you're safe here. No need to stress yourself out in the real world anymore. No more arguments with your mom, no more in person school. You’ll do online school if you want to do that, no having to work because we will happily provide for you, and there are many rooms here for your hobbies. You have everything you could ever want here!” he said with his arms in the air and happiness on his face. 
He visibly frowned along with fiance, toshi when tears welled in your eyes. Something snapped in you and you threw your sparkling water at hizashi’s face. He stumbled back a bit and toshinori stepped in front of him in a protecting manner. “Now, y/n that was very rude. You shouldn’t hit your boyfriend like that. Keep that up and we will have no choice but to restrain you.” He looked at you very seriously. Rage surged through your system. Something that didn’t go unnoticed by the pair. 
“Toshi it’s fine” hizashi mumbled while getting out from behind him and making his way towards you with his hands up in front of him like he's calling a truce.“Sweety pie, it's ok. Please don't do that again. We’re trying to help you.” he says calmly like talking to a ferocious animal. While toshinori picks up the sparkling water and sets it back on the counter. “Fuck you” you snarl at them. “That language will not be tolerated here. Apologize right now!” toshinori said to you with a booming volume. Making you jump a little. You took your shot and swung at hizashi. You honestly should have expected to lose. He’s a pro hero after all. He dodged it and grabbed your arm, twisting your body in the process until your back is against his chest with both of your wrists trapped in his strong hands. “GOD DAMN IT Y/N, PLEASE!” hizashi growled in irritation. 
That didn’t stop you. Your arms and torso may have been immobile in the moment but your legs and feet weren’t. You jumped in his arms and kicked his legs behind you. “FUCK” he let go of you and stumbled back while grabbing his calves. You took the opportunity while he wasn’t looking and punched him. Before you could turn the other direction to run. Two Huge arms caught you and body slammed you. Your head hitting the floor quite hard. Your whole body immoble. Looking up you see a very angry all might seething with anger. In the background you hear hizashi ranting angrily while the sound of kitchen cabinets and drawers are opened violently and slammed shut. He's looking for something. “I really didnt want to this. But you pushed your fucking luck” He seethed angrly while limping around the kitchen and destroying cabinets to find what he was looking for. “GOD DAMN IT, WHERE THE FUCK DID THE STUPID MOTHERFUCKERS PUT IT!?” he yelled while violently slamming a cabinet door closed. Referring to the people setting up the house. All might continued to stare coldly into your frantic eyes. You couldn’t see anything besides him. His huge body caging you between him and the floor. You couldn’t see anything behind him, you could only hear and it doesn't sound good. You’ve never heard hizashi so angry and heartbroken. He continued speaking. 
“Your lucky Shota isnt here right now. Your lucky beyond a level you could never comprehend. Your ass would have been done for.” He seethed. He sighed in relief when he found the cabinet with the medicine in it. You heard him grab a bottle of pills and open it. 
“I didn’t want to do this, I really fucking didnt. I wanted you to get used to the house and everything. But no YOU just had to make this a big fucking thing. You're seriously lucky that Sho  isn’t here right now. I honestly should have just listened to him when he told me to lock your ass up in chains in the basement the second you step foot in here.” He mumbled in pure anger. The sound of pills falling out of the container and into his palm can be heard before he closes the pill bottle and slams it on the counter, walking towards your trapped form. 
“You got her toshi?” he asked while squatting down. “Mhm” toshi said while forcing you to sit up and wrapping an arm around your torso and the other around your shoulder with a hand holding a iron clasp grip on your jaw forcing it open. Hizashi cupped his hand over your open mouth, popping the pills into your mouth. Toshinori forces your mouth closed and tilts your head up, while hizashi starts massaging your throat forcing you to swallow the pills. After you swallowed them he put your head back down and continued to hold you. You watched as Hizashi stared at you angrily. His gaze softened after a minute. “I know baby, I know. Things will get better.” he said as he pet the side of your head, moving the sweaty hair out of your face. He smiled gently at you as your world began spinning and fading. Toshi hummed as the back of your head rested against his chest and your body began to grow limp. He held you tightly until you blacked out. 
Meanwhile Shota sits in the chair in the corner of the hotel room with his fingers intertwined. Thinking, and brainstorming. Izuku is long gone. Shota had him sent back to japan with a friend of his. The friend came and did Shota a favor. He cloned you with the hair that Shota plucked from your head while he was kissing you goodbye. Your clone's body is dead on the floor. Shota tries not to look at it. It hurts him too much, it’s like looking at your actual dead body. He couldn’t handle seeing his babygirl dead. 
He zones out and stares at the tv as it plays. His attention is snapped to his phone as it rings. He pulls it out of his pocket and sees that it’s his boss. “Hello?” he mumbled into the phone. “Aizawa, how are things going?” his boss asked. “Uh things are going ok. All Might and I found them. Izuku is still alive and was sent back to japan to the investigative team and y/n’s body was found in a hotel room. The team are on the way.” aizawa said to his boss. 
“What do you think happened Aizawa?” his boss asked, intrigued. “I dont know. It seems like the killer struck again. She’s dead the same way all the others died.” shota said, deciding to go easy on Izuku and not blame it on him. “Ok, well thank you for letting me know Aizawa, do you need a ride back here?” “yes.” “ok i'm sending a jet your way.” “thank you” “no problem.”
With that Shota hung up. “Jesus it's already 6 a.m. I must’ve stayed up all night zoning out.” 
“I'm free, I'm finally free” you sighed as you ran away from the house. The crisp cool air hitting your face as you run. The speed you were running caused your hair to lift into the air as you ran for your life. The smell and taste of pure freedom. ‘Wait? Whats happening?’ you thought as your running slowed like molasses  and the world began fading into nothingness. You looked around as everything faded into the abyss. Your body is then lifted into the air and thrown all the way back into the house.
You jolted awake. The light of the sun peaking through the open curtains and hitting your face in a blinding way. “Good morning sweet pea” you looked over and seen toshinori sitting on the couch looking over documents. You were sitting in the corner of the living room next to the staircase. You shuffled and tried to get up but your legs and back hurt from being body slammed yesterday. You looked down when you heard a clunk. Chains. Your ankles were in chains that were wrapped and locked securely around a small pillar near the staircase. Fuck. 
The smell of food filled the air. It smelled amazing. You looked to your right and could see into the kitchen. Hizashi was in a tight pair of pink boxers and was shirtless, wearing a white apron. His jumped back a bit when he got popped with whatever was frying. He looked over and seen you awake. “Songbird im glad your awake, how was your sleep? Shota should be back very soon, just got off the phone with him.” he said with glee. You groaned and slouched back against the wall. “Foods almost done.” he called out. He put a lid over the pot and walked over to you and crouching down.
“Sorry about this.” he whispered to you while pointing to the chains around your ankle. “It has to be done. Maybe when your being a good girl, we’ll let you out, ya dig?” he smiled at you. He stood up and went back to the kitchen. About 5 minutes later he came out with food. 
Toshi pecked him on the lips for a thank you and begun to eat. “Wish you could eat at the table with us babe.” hizashi said was he put a tray of breakfast in front of you. The tray has a bowl of rice, miso soup, boiled veggies, kimchi, and some fried salmon. Fuck it smelled amazing. You were too hungry to deny it. You began eating and almost died from how good it was. Even though you werent at the table. The pair still tried to hold a conversation like you were. “Is it good baby?” hizashi asked as he noticed you drooling over the food. You felt heat rush to your face as you avoided eye contact and continued to eat. He shoveled food into his mouth as he spoke. “ I kinda overdid the dosage of the pills. Sorry about that.” he said in between chews. 
All of your heads snapped over to the front door as the handle moved. “Sho must be home now” toshinori said as he took a mouthful of rice. The sounds of keys jingled on the other end and the door was pushed open. In came a very worn out Shota. He took off his scarf and put it on the coat rack. He kicked off his shoes and hugged hizashi who practically ran and thew himself at him. “Isnt it such a lovely home?” hizashi asked. Shota looked around and smiled. “Yeah it is” he looked over to you and walked over and crouched down. He rubbed the top of your head and pecked your lips. He sat down next to you and held you. The smell of sweat was very strong on him, making you wince. “Hey baby” He was staring into your eyes in adoration and appreciation after having to look at your clones dead body for hours. He was shaking lightly. He was nervous, you noticed. 
Toshinori cut in. “why dont you take a shower babe, the food will be waiting for you when you come back” shota stood back up and nodded in agreement and headed up stairs but not before shooting you a loving look and pecking you on the lips. 
Toshinori cleaned up everyones plates as they finished eating and turned the television up when something on the screen caught his attention. Shota came back downstairs freshly washed and in his boxers. He grabbed the plate of food that hizashi made for him. He ate like a man starved. 
His and everybody else’s attention snapped to the screen when toshinori turned on the news. 
“The case of the two missing children has been solved, with izuku midoriya being found alive, and the body of y/n being found on the ground of a hotel room in america. Thanks to the special help of All Might, Izuku made it back to japan safe and sound. unfortunately what happened to y/n’s body seems to look like the work of japan’s active serial killer. We are hoping to find them soon. That is all the information we have on this case so far. Thank you for listening.” 
Shota looked proud and hizashi and toshinori seemed relieved that  everyone believed what they said. You look down to the floor in confusion and fear. Everyone now believes im dead. What am i supposed to do now? 
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mcytshippystuff · 1 year ago
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Can I ask how you view Brunim and Forever's relationship since you mentioned it in your last post? You said you viewed it as toxic on both ends and that it messed Forever up, can you go into more detail?
(as always, /rp, not irl) Also go here for more hcs on q!Forever's relationships this ask is referencing!
Okay so!! Like I said before in that posts tags, I dont know a WHOLE lot about the canon relationship between q!Forever and... c!Brunim? q!Brunim? Whatever, I dont know the canon but from what iv seen, in rp its very much not healthy. So I ended up building my own hcs for them and idk how accurate they are canon wise but I still like em regardless so im sticking to em lol!
(Tw for talks of abuse, toxic relationships, and unhealthy relationships!)
So first thing to note; These guys were really fucked up, toxic, and probs abusive in several places. They started out softer, kinder, safer, but it did not stay that way. Still, know that they loved each other regardless.
In my head, Brunim was very much the aggressor, and the one who started being toxic, abusive, and obsessive about Forever, and was worse about it. Forever ended up becoming toxic and doing toxic/shitty/obsessive things in turn as a by product. I wont say Brunim was the only one who had issues and did bad things but Forever only ended up becoming like that becuase Brunim taught him that's how he showed love in their relationship, so he showed it that way back ya know?
But thing is they stopped being happy, stopped awhile ago in fact and realized they couldn't keep doing this to each other, hurting each other, for both their sakes. Its hard to recognize you are doing something wrong, and it was even harder to let go, for real this final time, and only through help did they manage it but they did.
But the thing is, Brunim was Forever's first real relationship, and it had messed him up. Untangling yourself from that sort of thing is fucking hard, knowing where the line is or where something is toxic and unhealthy romantic wise (or even in general) is even harder when its pretty much your only real frame of reference and unlearning all that shit is hard and takes time too.
So when Forever got to the island, while he's made leaps and bounds from where he use to be, enough he can mess around and even joke with someone who reminds him of Brunim without actually having issues with it (at least at first lol), is still in the process of trying to unlearn his more unhealthy behaviors and expectations.
That's where some of his more concerning phrases or claims come from, either not knowing the line as he crosses it due to skewed misconceptions, saying it jokingly becuase he'd never actually go through with it (though probs shouldn't of said it regardless but hey that's coping with trauma for ya), or knowing the line but crossing it anyways on impulse and having to pull back becuase he doesn't mean it/regrets it. He would never on purpose dip back into those toxic behaviors but like I said, still unlearning and understanding those.
Forever would never actually go through with anything toxic, abusive, or unhealthy for the most part on purpose btw, if that wasn't clear.
There is a little bit, like mentioned in the main post, where when he does start to catch feelings it is becuase of him confusing Brunim with Phil, but Forever does beginning to actually fall for him and it takes a bit to fully separate them, and his expectations of it all. But hell he cant stop loving Phil even if he does eventually see Phil will not change his mind about Forever loving him.
But anyhoo enough about the main thing, smaller but still important stuff-
Like I said Brunim was Forever's first real relationship, and they did actually love each other under all the shit it became. Didn't mean any of what happened was okay tho.
Brunim is a vampire, and fed off regularly of Forever. He didn't have issues with it at first but quickly became painful and a bad time.
(tw for scars and a bit of gore) Forever actually has a horrific scar on his neck from the feedings, though its hard to tell if it becuase Brunim would very slightly shift around where he would bite in to feed over time so it became a mass of scar tissue, or if he ripped out a chunk of Forever's flesh for whatever reason. Forever usually keeps it covered but it burns sometimes.
Brunim's way of punishing Forever was usually to lock him up until he behaved again, specially if they were on "break" and Brunim wanted Forever back. Hence why Forever uttered "lock you up until love me." He wasn't serious about it but later feels sick he said it even jokingly.
Forever is surprisingly mentally stable despite all this and has worked hard on his mental health, thanks to therapy. Most of his issues, like I said, come from trying to unlearn all that toxic shit and unhealthy behaviors.
They really miss each other but tbh its more they miss what they had before, as well as the comfort in the not being alone despite the pain. Regardless Forever will never go back to Brunim, even if they both change for the better.
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josephtrohman · 7 months ago
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sorry if you’ve been asked this before, would you be willing to spare some joetrick fic recs? i’m getting super back into them and the bandom so wanted to jump back in with some recs maybe!! (do you still prefer top joe? do you have any toppy patrick? if thats not your bag i don’t mind i’ll honesty take anything you think is well written atp 😁 ty!!!)
i’m sorry it’s taken me a couple days to answer this anon!!! finals got me both tweaking and sleep deprived at the same time somehow. also tho let it be known there is nothing to be sorry for at allllll omg, and there Never is, imagine my inbox as a safe warm place where i’m always here for ANYTHING. anyways, i have answered some joetrick fic recs earlier, here is the link to that post which has my crème de la crème joetrick fics, but i always have more in my back pocket!!! start with that other post’s list tho first for sure!!!! just bc they are THEE BEST. ok gonna put the rest under a break here (including my answers to ur question LOLL) :3
i truthfully have mellowed out when it comes to top/bottom preferences lol (i wonder if ur an og follower and saw my ask from like 2016 that i may have answered more intensely about preferring top joe and oh god the 'bottom patrick network' i was in way back when networks were a thing HDKDJDKDJSJ). i actually really enjoy top patrick/bottom joe in this day and age but there is like. none still. so i dont have much to offer u 💔 but im working on something and so is a fobtwt friend of mine so keep ur eyes peeled!!!
i combed my archive and found u my (very) slim pickings for toppy patrick. which imo is a disgrace and i Have contributed to this pattern of mostly bottom patrick w my fics BUT i hope to change this fact as i have a wip that’s just pwp top patrick/bottom joe maybe coming in the next several months LOLLLL (also my fobtwt friend as i mentioned). but i’ll start with the closest things i can find. i’m gonna break it down with the kind of adjacent to ur request fics First and then give a few more recs after :)
an exploration of the bounds of venus by disloyalorder. this might be the only top patrick pure joetrick smut on ao3 (that i found well-written enough to save at least <3). it’s got a heavy dose of mommy kink/mommy dom stuff so i guess if that’s not ur thing then u really will have to stay tuned for my fic ;) haha
wasted summer by terriblewritings. shoutout to the author for dropping it in my inbox!!! it has the mommy kink too and a liiiiiiittle talk of weight just in an appreciative way idk but a warning; it’s toppy patrick in the sense of dom patrick bc there’s no penetration, but it’s rly good!!! author says there might be more coming too ;3
token by gigantic. this one i found on total accident, i had been digging around on this user’s livejournal because they have two PHENOMENAL wentzman fics up (if u want those recs too lmk) but basically this one is joe on a gay sex mission lol, it is explicit but ofc when u get to the goods (aka the JOETRICK SCENE) it's all fade-to-black instead 💔 but still SOOOOO good so unbelievably well written!!!
i had it listed it in the other rec ask, but bdsm by heyginger has a brief mention of joe riding patrick (not explicit smut tho lol) AND of patrick tying joe up so it feels on the toppy patrick side for sure :)
also for good measure, though patrick is not toppy to JOE in these ones, there are two jeterick fics that feature patrick topping pete while joe does stuff to them etc just maybe to scratch a similar itch? lay your head down -- and feel the beat and two's company, three's just right both by likeasugarcube.
begging all ao3 writers to PLEASEEE write more top patrick/bottom joe joetrick fics i want to read joe get fucked like he deserves <3 ok anyways
EDITING THIS ASK FROM THREE MONTHS IN THE FUTURE TO SAY i have a top patrick joetrick fic up NAOW anon if you happen to return to this ask again anon. addicted to the way i feel when i think of you by josephtrohman aka yours truly ;3 (AND EDITING AGAIN TO SAY I HAVE A TOP PATRICK PUPPY PLAY JOETRICK FIC)
and now here r some general recs that aren’t toppy patrick related :)
my tongue is my choir by coricomille. patrick is mute (mixon is their vocalist) and it’s a wonderfully written, very sweet fic!!!
capture the phrases by rosiedoesfic. patrick has a secret admirer in the form of anonymous post it notes. so good<3
expensive mistakes by rosiedoesfic. cute little fic about the insta posts in mania era that had very joetricky captions :')
the cure to growing older by rosiedoesfic. a au fic where joe and patrick have been friends since they were little kids, a very cute growing up together type story :)
message in a bottle by bunnytrohman. a sweet lil getting together fic sent during 2ourdust. saur beautiful and the world needs more fics set in the stardust era imo!!!
take a breath (i know what's behind that door) by thesecondshow. joe checks in on/takes care of patrick right after the we liked you better fat post. really really beautifully written <3 (hai mitch if u see this)
your secret's out by the_seventh_avenger. cute lil fic, honestly hard to summarize with a lil blurb without giving everything away but love it so much!!
alpha dog by bunnytrohman. puppy play joetrick. i needn’t say more READ THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
leaving it there bc looking at my bookmark list there aren't like a TON more that i even really could rec so i'll save those for if someone else asks in another 10 months <3 lol love u anon my inbox (and dms!!! if u wanna reveal urself but no pressure) is always open to discuss these fics or ANYTHING too 💖
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selfspinninglies · 7 months ago
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👁️👁️?
hi aureo that was fast . anyway explanation under the cut woo
its kinda fuzzy in my head since ive only had this idea for two days including today so . but basically theres magic in the world that this takes place in (side tangent that isnt totally important but im gonna talk about how it works now if you dgaf skip to the plot stuff) its mostly not demonized/hated/feared/whatever cause i dont feel like it . anyway basically the energy needed is inside of your blood so whenever you use it it draws it out of you in some way (depends on what its used for) or you can draw it out yourself (bloodletting) and depending on how strong the spell you're doing is a certain amount of blood will be needed which causes !! a lot of problems for magic users . also its not like . a lineage thing anyone can learn how to do it because another part of how it works is making bonds/pacts with spirits that hold power over certain things and the blood is like . the offering also and you can either use incantations of sorts to do spells or just command things that youve borrowed power over also if your family has a pact with a spirit you are automatically in that also
vey end up going into the center of the woods and there's a grave in the clearing so vey go to it and make a blood offering assuming that this is the correct place (<- its not . oops) which ends up pissing off the spirit there because they do not have a pact together so vey are Not supposed to do that . it ends up pissing the spirit off more by admitting that it thought this was the correct place to be for a different spirit who was apparently not even close to here . who knew (everyone except erika) . the spirit ends up laying a curse on nem as its one of those angry and restless ones + got angered further . the spirit explains that somewhere in their body the seed of the plant that fits them best will start growing inside of them at a random place and slowly kill them by taking all of their energy and eventually spread out of them and essentially take over their body . they don't say if there's any way to cure/get rid of and it doesn't really sound like there is . they also say that when ey're at eir deathbed ey'll drag eir body back to this very spot and become part of the forest in the same way the spirit is . (sorry i keep saying "the spirit" i know it sounds kinda weird but i havent named them yet) (also ihave sooosososo many thoughts about how this would work so . maybe another time but if you wanna hear me go insane ask)
(other side tangent) also the way that the spirits work is that if you're connected to something deeply throughout life and your death is also connected to that thing (ex you have a connection to oceans/lakes/rivers your entire life and then you drown and die) you become bound to it spiritually and it becomes literally a part of you which means you have command over it kinda (does any of this make sense . idk) but it sucks a lot because the thing draws out your energy after death to fuel your ability cause like i said earlier spells require energy n shit but you also gain the ability to share your ability with others which relieves it a little since the burden isnt all on you BUT some spirits are angrier and curse anyone who steps foot near the area where they died . also their abilities and people who have deals with them's powers are amplified in the death area
ANYWAY actual plot time . the protagonists name is erika/erik (goes by both) (any pronouns but mostly uses neos) and ney're part of a family that has a pact (<- i think im going with that as for what ill call these) with some sort of plant spirit ney aren't sure which one though ney didnt pay much attention to the explanation of it all . it doesnt care too much about its lineage its more interested in biology and anatomy related things (<- woaww title reference) and also salamanders . its not story important but ve really likes salamanders . anyway x2 nix is somewhere in nixs early 20s and lives alone in an apartment planning on going to college soon but is putting it off . probably works a shitty 9-5 that it hates idk . very tired guything . theyre kinda bored and start thinking about their abilities and general ineptitude with it and decide that they'll go to the forest that their pact spirit dwells in to feel more connected to it or whatever . ey didn't really plan things through a lot . It makes a small bag with some supplies in it just in case and goes to the place that it thinks is the correct one but ends up being wrong and ends up in a very large forest . paragraph break because this one's getting long
obviously it freaks the fuck out about this and ends up running veryvery far away from the clearing and ends up collapsing somewhere because its really fucking tired . in the morning to nix's surprise nothing happened to nix in that time . anyway first thing he does is take out a diagram of the human body that was in one of the notebooks that he took with him and starts drawing out what the curse might look like on the inside . (which is also kinda where the name of the story comes from)
hey remember how i said energy needed for spells lay inside someone's blood . and how the plants will sap off of the person's energy and therefore blood . and how erik's family has a pact with a plant spirt . hey do you think that might be just a little important -
so anyway she tries to find her way back but fails miserably because the one thing she happened to forget was a map of any kind so now she's stuck in a forest with a deadly curse and no idea how to fix herself. they frantically walk through the forest and end up finding a village filled with totally normal people yayyy . anyway when they get there they say that they got lost in the woods and need a place to stay until they figure stuff out . oddly enough someone agrees to house them for a bit . The people of the town are incessant with questions, particularly about if they've encountered the spirit . on impulse he lies saying that he didnt which totally wont bite him in the ass later i mean who said that . anyway thats basically the plot theres more but this is already long as fuck and i dont feel like typing anymore idk how much of this makes sense but whateverrr im sleepy n sickly (<- has a cold) so . yeah hope you like it :]]
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visionthefox · 10 months ago
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small sams rant (I swear this one is dumb- but I need to let it out) SPOILERS I TALK ABOUT THE NEW EP. (specially Solar x Moon) RESUME : Im bothered over a simple one off scene that may not mean anything in the long run and can actually be debunked at any time -but my ass feels like complaining today..
I dont know how to feel about it. no I dont care for Jack, the use of new models is bound to happend, and the lore is mid- is to be expected no- what bothers me is the first SECONDS of it.. when Jack list the Celestial Family- he added Solar .. and.. that is bothersome for me ppl didnt used to have an issue shipping Solar and Moon., sure maybe it was just a crack ship or too small to be noticed, yet as time passed it was clear the two had created a bond.. now.. this bond could be seen as anyhing we wished for.. until Earth had to "ruin it" in a way- pushing (?) Solar into accepting to be call something related to family- as one can see in the ep Lunar is in huge trouble in VRCHAT- (but amma be honest? I know of this clip by this vid , since I avoid anything with Earth on it,but that clip is important) He is not really so eager to do- sure maybe is just Solar being Solar (also- I view that as pushy- you can tell me is not- but this is how I see it- Im the problem) but you may think! someone who pretty much had lost his whole family as he was force to leave them -and now is living under someone else place- would be at least happy to be accepted as family, if not just show gratitude -he can express happiness! he can laugh.-he for sure can say "oh.. well.. thanks you" and move on but what does he say? "you dont have to actually use a family tree for this- im just " and she cut him off - sure her intention may be good but she is so pushy about it .. he comes to actually say he may feel like a cousin and soon enough doesnt like the sound of that.. well he said "that does not roll of the tounge" and I googled what does it mean, so is not like he is not comfortable but also.. is not like He is %100 up to that tittle.. ALL OF THIS TO SAY - I feel like due to the "drama"? issue, with the ship and Earth now saying he is "part of the family" -whoever is on control of the channel had to take a decision.. and this may be it.. (no I dont think the VA sare in control. they are just VAsthey do a job) Solar can be classified as "family" - yet.. family can mean different things- from where Im from- we call say "you are like family to me" as a way to say "I feel close to you" but actually view the person as a good Friend- but the thing is, the show may want to just set Solar as family- and so avoid any if not all mention to a ship (and I know the term is often used for romantic, but I did see ppl like them to be both ace who just like each other) and I feel.. bad.. I feel like by doing this they ruin the fun of actually having a windows open for the joy of "what if" scenarios.. is not like ppl cant just make and AU like when ppl did to be able to ship Sun and Eclipse, just a silly AU to let loose- (silly hero and tamed villain type of thing) but yea.. idk.. Solar as actually a friend felt more right than him being "family"- dude is not one to actually ask ppl to do much bonding- nor he seems to actually be interested on these familiar things (the Christmas was more as a wholesome thing- in my eyes- (but also I didnt see if fully-again, I dont watch anyting with Earth on it)) but yea.. idk- is not even a big deal. but Im in love with their dymanics as besties.. (or lovers~)
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ambyandony · 1 year ago
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Starlit Labyrinth - Gregory Vecellio Profilette
The first thing you might notice is his surname is Vecellio... sound familiar? yeah... we'll get to that.
By the way
//BIG tw: nothing explicit of course, but topics of child abuse, CSA
the part that applies will be marked by start and end indicators
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you dont have to read that tiny ass text im putting it all below
Gregory Vecellio
age 11 ~ boy ~ he/him
tw/ Gregory is a young boy who, throughout the majority of his early childhood, had been horrifically abused, mistreated and hidden from the world. From a very young age, he was trafficked, exploited, and passed between various men in various parts of the world, including the USA, Canada, and, lastly, Italy. Eventually, he reached a breaking point, and using his Stand—which he'd never before used—he escaped, attacking anyone who tried to get in the way until he'd gotten out. /tw
Once he'd escaped, misuse of his new ability caused grievous damage to his throat; he lost consciousness from the severity of the injury, at which point he was (unsurprisingly) taken to hospital when a passerby called emergency services after seeing him. As a result of the damage, which was to the point of being completely irreversible, his larynx was removed, and with it, he lost the ability to speak and was left with a stoma (tracheostomy) to allow him to breathe. He'd ultimately—unable to tell anyone much of anything but his name and age and seemingly having no legal record of existence—end up being placed in a children's home, where he would remain until eventually (c. 2019) being adopted by a couple—the Vecellios. Though it took him a good while to get used to his new dads and settle given his traumatic background, he would eventually come to trust and feel safe around Tiziano and Squalo, and with their help, has begun to heal.
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I drew a comic but I feel like it's kinda cringe so I'll put it under the cut at the bottom alright?
Gregory wears moccasins and a poncho as they are very comfortable for him; his neck is bandaged most of the time, leaving room on the neck for his stoma, and his hands are bandaged as well to prevent him from picking and biting his skin on his hands. He wears a little tape deck on his waist... which is actually...
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His Stand,
「In Fact」.
Gregory's 「In Fact」 is a bound Stand visible to non-Stand-Users, taking the form of a portable tape deck which allows him, despite his injury, to speak—by stealing and using the voices of others, in the form of cassette tapes. The potential damage caused by this is variable; if he's in distress when taking a voice, it's more likely to be painful and also runs the risk of causing mild-to-severe internal damage. Otherwise, the process can be harmless, and will likely only cause some dull pain or aching at worst.
Once a voice is taken, the tape is placed in the tape deck, which then allows Gregory to speak by using the voice he took, including the accent. This doesn't, however, allow him to speak any languages he doesn't already know, as language is not a "physical" aspect of the voice. This limitation is probably due to the fact that removing a target's voice is, in essence, metaphysically removing their larynx so that Gregory can replace his own missing one, hence the target no longer being able to speak themself. In doing this, as the voice is always removed through the throat, a slot—which is semi-meta-physical—is created, functioning as a stoma to allow the person to breathe, but, like Gregory normally, not speak.
He can only use the voice a certain amount before he needs to rewind the tape to speak more. The amount differs depending on various factors, usually how much the Stand has "heard" the target speak; the more the target's spoken, the longer Gregory can speak with the voice before needing to rewind. He can also take voices post-mortem, although it can be a little more complicated; however, a dead person's voice will eventually run out and dissipate entirely. Multiple tapes can be made from a single dead person's voice, but all of the tapes will eventually run out over time and will dissolve or unravel (and then dissolve) entirely.
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Transcript:
top left:
Record "burns"* a voice so that it can be removed *like a CD and also a lot like fire
Play activates the voice to allow Gregory to speak
Rewind Self-explanatory
Fast-forward has no function outside of playing regular tapes.
Stop disables and ejects voice
idk what this is
(yes it can play normal tapes too)
top right:
His hands glow when he takes a voice. it looks like fire. Feels like it, too. Having your voice stolen always burns.
middle:
Voices are removed from the throat
Meta-semi-physical slot, it's physical in function (allowing the person to breathe) but not actually visible (at least not to non-stand users).
Things can be put into the slot other than a voice but it's really not recommended. Gregory does this with water sometimes if he's really in danger and has a chance. It leaves an opening for 「Clash」 to show up and cause some fucking ruination (as long as Squalo's in range)
Once the voice is returned, it leaves a physical red mark that takes a while to fade. It'll ache or sting for a while.
bottom left:
Tapes are always labelled with the name of the person who the voice belongs to. Sometimes, it's written on masking tape and stuck over where the name would usually be instead.
Voice tapes typically look something like this.
Details may vary (this number basically indicates the available talking time before rewind is needed).
bottom right:
Tapes with no one to return to will eventually unravel or self destruct in some way (like if it belongs to a dead person)
this isnt canon btw at all but just establishing a vibe yknow its kinda cringe but i made it suuuuuper quick lol
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nomairuins · 2 months ago
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future for scientist, bound for cadaver, and monster for both of them? 🤔
future: What's the worst possible future for your OC? Are they taking steps to avoid that outcome? Are they even aware it's a possibility?
SO unfortunately for scientist i think the worst outcome for her is. achieving immortality FJNFJFN despite that being the one thing shes working towards yk. i think deepdown she knows this but shes still pursuing it bc shes basically in denial abt it... i think her being immortal would rly enhance some of her worst traits. like she already feels disconnected/dofferent/isolated from other people (which is partially why shes pursuing immortality in the first place) but if she got it it would just be. soooo much worse. i truly believe if she did become immortal shed fuck off to like. the most isolated place on earth and shed never talk to another person ever again. Which she might think is a good thing but it absolutely would not be
bound: Has your OC ever been imprisoned or captured? What happened? How did they get out? Did the experience leave any scars?
soo this one is difficult bc cadavers backstory im changing my mind on it majorly atm... previously i did have him being arrested and held in prison for a while and then being broken out/recaptured by scientist but im not sure if i still want all that .. the like. nature of his ... Whole thing has changed a lot since i originally came up with her so im not sure if that still works. like it Could but idk... so this one is a bit of a weird question to answer atm bc i havent fully decided yet... i suppose depending on how much control you view cadaver as having you could say like. living with scientist is imprisonment but i do think if cadaver actually wanted to get out it probably could. SO idk... also scars r also being reconsidered in my mind bc previously i had him Getting scars but now im not sure if that actually makes sense with the healing thing... but the issue is one of the main reasons i made him is bc i think autopsy scars r cool 😭😭😭 so i dont know...
monster: Is your OC monstrous in any way? Is there something that makes them monstrous? Are they aware of their own monstrosity? Do they accept it or reject it?
scientist: YAY so i think scientist has always felt inherently other. but i think meeting cadaver RLY changed her for the worst like. she literally regularly murders another person. and yeah he gets better but you dont just like... even if its not permanent you cant just become ok with killing someone without being a little bit off. yk. i think physically shes human (unless i decide that she Does take on the whole possession thing. constant flipflopping in connorland) but i think mentally she goes from being like. kind of a misanthropic loner to being like. she basically simultaneously views cadaver as an ideal that shes jealous of (bc he has the one thing she wants, and bc she feels a sort of connection w it bc they have like.. similar but different motivations. yk...). and if the only person youve ever felt any sort of similarity to is a corpse possessed by ambiguous force i dont think youre like . you know ...
cadaver: so this is soo fun bc ive actually been considering having cadaver a bit more monstrous like. physically. bc obviously shes not human anymore BUT i think itd be fun if the possession had some physical effects on him... currently he just has the extreme healing/resurrection abilities but id imagine hed probably have some sort of enhanced strength as well. and i just love when possession has a physical component... but yes. EMOTIONALLY i think cadaver is weirdly in denial abt being a monster. like. i think she views the original part of her the one that died as like. the monstrous one. it feels more human now that its possessed bc prior to her death she was like. Somewhat similar to scientist in that she was very isolated but it was less of a choice if this makes sense. like scientist consciously isolates herself from ppl bc she just Assumes that they arent like. sorry im turning this into being about scientist again DJFNJF cadaver go lay at the bottom of the pool or something im busy. but yk she has that like. a view of herself thats seperate from other people/from humanity so she just doesnt bother talking to other people bc she assumes they would never understand. yk. so it is A choice to isolate from ppl (altho she also like..does not have social skills at all. as a result of this choice. so yk...) but w cadaver cadaver was alllways desperate for connection but in a like. rather than searching for One specific like. Unattainable kind of connection he wanted anything. and thats why she was so enthusiastic abt the connection bc it meant there would always be like. Someone. yk. and obv post connection shes a lot more like. confident and Able to make friends despite being physically more disconnected from humanity if this makes sense. so yes. i think cadaver is Literally more monstrous than scientist but i dont think thats how he feels abt himself at all.
link to ask game!
#i hope this makes sense i rambled so bad i love thinking abt like. their views of themselves. yk..#the parallels between predeath cadaver and scientist r rly rly fascinating to me which is funny bc I made them up DJFNFJFN but like.#bc w scientist like. her motivation for immortality is bc she wants to know Everything. she wants to transcend like. humanity and she wants#fully seperate herself from the human part of herself that shes always hated. which is the part that Wants connection and wants to feel#understood. she basically wants to be a robot or a god or something like that. yk. a part of her wants to remain human and the rest of her#Hates that part. yk. whereas w cadaver her immortality motivation was kind of like. tbh the immortality was a side effect NDNFJFNF he was#just like Ooh boy a thing who lives in my head who will intrinsically get me and never leave me and well be together forever. And bonus will#help me talk to people and everyone will love me and view me as a god. YAYYYY YAYYYY. and then the immortality is just kind of another bonus#bc w cadaver it just loves like. attention. and being seen in ANY way. so post death i think likeee. bc of its immortality other ppl tend to#revere it . yk. its personality is sort of magnetic despite the feeling of it judt being like. off. yk. i think that fulfills the need and#it kind of doesnt care that its like. they still dont actually understand him yk. hes still An other to them. she just views it as adoration#which is what it wants. you know. i think theres a partnof cadaver that still feels empty and longs for like. Genuine care#if this makes any sense at all. BUT YA IDK. THIS MAY MAKE NOOO SENSE AT ALL. the ramblerrr
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tinylittlecubby · 3 months ago
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In the following possibly concerning for my psychiatric health rant , I will be covering what the actual definition of parasocial is, the function and normalness of regular parasociality, why some mediums invite stans more than others and what would need to change to eradicate stan culture. Im unfortunately just someone with an internet connection and im writing this on mobile so if any degree of understanding in regards to those facts can be maintained I would be very grateful!
1) i would rather do a flip off the bellagio instead of meet any of the people who's art/content I consume I just want to say that first
1b) however I have participated in fandom since I was literally 7 years old so I know way too much about fandoms in general and also parasociality.
2)the partition between social worlds is an illusion. If it happens in one place it happens in another. People putting artists on a pedestal and then tearing them down is something that also happens in arenas outside of popular culture like the sciences and in peoples very own homes. Uniqueness of circumstance is rare and the breadth of human capability in terms of horror and beauty is present no matter the field.
3) Parasocial relationships have an actual psychological function (more on this later) Because of the term 'relationship' and the cultural baggage around that term it is assumed that it is something that is purely done outside of the bounds of the time it takes to consume the media. Even the term caring is loaded more than it should.
Art and media should push us to care and ultimately, a parasocial relationship is JUST caring about a subject ( like a person or object or idea) BUT they/it LITERALLY can not care about you back due to lack of knowing SPECIFICALLY you.
Off of that definition that is why in order for media to be effective a parasocial relationship has to exsist. It makes sense to care about one character over another depending on how a film is written, and this state/relationship of caring last the duration of the film.
That feeling of caring about the character can persist beyond the literal duration of the film due to how emotionally moving it could've been however I find that for films most people do not continue that state beyond the literal duration of the film (in terms of fantasies about the character as I dont find that there are many fanfictions for example about movies -unless they have been made into TV shows as well- etc), due to it being one of the shorter mediums today both in the media itself and the promotion cycle/exposure to the people involved, which is why I picked movies.
I want to make that distinction cause people often say we need to eradicate parasocial relationships altogether and I dont think they understand that parasocial is a sociological term that was coined in 1956/57 and has an extremely long history OUTSIDE of social media. And if the term was coined then that means the phenomenon was going on prior.
Also, films are fake. Literally everyone knows this, no one gets mad at anyone for saying that cause we all know this. However films, when the term was coined, were seen as THE medium that facilitated parasocial relationships (in the sense i described above in terms of the duration of the film, rather than the sense that is used now in terms of being a stan)
And about movies being fake and maybe that being why people stan actors less (sometimes def not all the time)
A) the amount of films and TV shows that try and use this narrative to go far beyond actors zone of consent ìs one of THE main problems with the entertainment industry. They are real people doing fake things but they are still people first.
B) i personally believe that it is in a streamers best interest to create a degree of a character to be on stream (can be a genuine persona or just to the degree of customer service agent. Aint nobody their god damn selves when being a customer service agent but they also aren't not being themselves. If you know you know.) So they too are in an arena of fakeness as well. This lack of understanding is why they constantly have to tell their audience "bro i don't know you AND you don't know me"
4a)and in regards to the statement that I made in terms of parasocial relationships having to exsist, I'm saying that with finances/politics/sociology in mind. There is a business theory in the arts that if you have 1000 true fans (defined as someone that will buy ALL of your merch, concert tickets,will listen to 90% of your music and genuinely enjoy, talk about the music to their friends to get them to like it as well etc etc) you can make your art on your own terms and consistently from a financial stand point. However, that kind of consumer is the exact type that participates in the parasocial relationship outside the duration of the medium and can take them to stan town. And record labels know this, that is why pop music lyrics are the way they are and even when they aren't romance oriented they still market the artist to be as 'authentic' as possible so the development of the parasocial relationship can continue outside the literal duration.
4b) in terms of the psychological function of parasociakity I would read into how children develop relationships with their toys. During active play it is developmentally normal for the child to act as if the toy can react back to the child's own affect/actions, that's why children will talk to or feed etc their toys. Outside of active play sometimes the child will mention the toy (usually in terms of requesting for it to begin active play OR talking about it like they are a friend and saying to a parent "do you think Bella would like this dress?" And the parent knows they are talking about the toy and would respond in kind and maybe they buy the little dress to dress up the toy (think of build a bears model of the type of inventory they sell) it is also common that if they are playing with a sibling or a friend and the other child is being rough with the toy the main child will use language such as "you are hurting them!" suggesting the child believe that the toy can feel literal pain the same way they can (because they are a literal child duh)
A child being able to show the capacity to communicate, empathize, emote and respond to stimuli the object may provide back (like if its a talking to) is absolutely MAJOR and is used in clinical studies during neurological testing in children literally all the time. And if you as an adult were to go up to a child and start berating them for this dynamic pal....you yourself got problems.
This is one of the many types of ways that children learn how to socialize and it happens concurrently with other types of learning in terms of interacting with peers, adults that may use language they dont know but helps them build they own language tool kit etc etc. It is absolutely NOT to be seen as the ONLY type of socializing. That is horrifying and I dont know what the hell would happen if it was literally the only type of socializing a child or even an adult would be receiving (also I dont know how that would literally happen either like do they live in the woods with literally no one else around??)
I say all of this to say that parasociality should NOT be demonized because doing so would be inconsistent with the overall cultural narrative about being social animals. If we are social animals then it makes sense that parasocialism exists. UNHEALTHY!!!!!!!!!!!!! parasocialism ABSOLUTELY needs to be extinguished i am not fighting anyone on that at all. Being a legit stan is VERY VERY SCARY! and I dont mean arguing about charting stan I mean hacking airport security cameras stan (if you know you know unfortunately)
My personal hesitation in terms of putting hope into this changing though is we would need to do the following
Reduce the social capital tied to perceived authenticity
Remove profit motives tied to artists being accessible
Eradicate amanormativity
Build safe,accessible and thriving third spaces
Invest in psychiatric infrastructure and resources
Create a healthy culture that supports the notion that individuality and interdependence can exsist at the same time
Eradicate misogyny
Eradicate ageism
Eradicate racism
Eradicate classism
Eradicate ableism
Eradicate whorephobia (BIG ONE!! the amount of female/non binary stans that are wild about their targets because they feel like its the only safe place they can express their sexuality via fanfiction, fan erotic audios (which is new and the audio stuff i dont know too much about but its something I'm seeing more and more)amongst other things is a proportion that is tooooooo high!
And the list goes on and on and on honestly
(Added this poll on accident because I'm on mobile and it won't erase oooppss)
I dont know if any of this made sense I feel like I just blacked out and I'm coming to but yeah yell at me if you like or ignore this its just my thoughts about parasociality and the like okay byyeeeeee
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hella1975 · 1 year ago
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do not start on touya because then I’ll start thinking about strangers I tried to be good am I no good am I no good am I no good you poor thing sweet mourning lamb there’s nothing you can do it’s already been done I’m still praying for that house in nebraska by the highway out on the edge of town dancing with the windows open I can’t let go when something’s broken it’s all I know and it’s all I want now. and THEN I’ll start thinking about arsonists making political statements and then I’ll think about what this really is: an unsatisfying story of a very sick child who realised he made a mistake he couldn't escape. it looks like he was trying to get out. this is the least comforting thing you can imagine. I need something that won’t fail I need something that I can’t come back from. and then I will simply go crazy. I’m already crazy. help
literally because if you think about touya you of course have to think about strangers which makes you think about preacher's daughter and his place in it all swinging by my neck from the family tree / jesus can always reject his father but he cant escape his mother's blood / tell me a story about how it ends where you're still the good guy i'll make pretend cause i hate this story where happiness ends and dies with you / i thought good guys get to be happy i'm not happy / i'm tired of you still tied to me / you love blood too much but not like i do / promising a big fire any fire saying im the one / he's gonna take me i'm on fire i'm on fire / suffering is nigh drawing to me calling me the one / i'm the white light beautiful finite / even the iron still fears the rot hiding from something i cannot stop walking on shadows i cant lead him back / buckled on the floor when night comes along daddy's left and momma won't come home / you poor thing sweet mourning lamb there's nothing you can do it's already been done / tell me, what have you done? stop stop stop make it stop / i am the face of love's rage / bound to suffering eternal through the sins of their fathers committed long before their conception / blessed be the children each and every one come to know their god through some senseless act of violence / god loves you but not enough to save you / i still feel like they all know and that's why i could never come back home / god i've tried but i think it's about time i put up a fight / but i dont mind because that's how my daddy raised me / i always knew that in the end no one was coming to save me so i just prayed and i keep praying and praying and praying / if it's meant to be then it will be i forgive it all as it comes back to me / your sweet divine you devour like smoked bovine hide.........
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