#i dont care that he eats humans. he has reasons i know it

[van-whorenheim]

Not so gentle reminder that Koga is the Mother of Wolves and they are his CHILDREN-

[canecone]

Are 2 Leowooks better than one

Leowook design sketch

[wickjump]

post irrational fic pet peeve that i can’t handle (but can tough through obv) is real life factors. a character mentions listening to a song that exists irl? i don’t like it. it makes literally no sense but i can’t handle it. their asses would NOT have access to most human technology and much less websites or apps!!! “he opened Twitter-“ NO!!! MONSTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FULLY ISOLATED FROM HUMANITY!!! THAT IS WHAT MAKES THEIR SITUATION SO BLEAK!!!! THEY ARE TRAPPED AND CANNOT BEG FOR HELP!!!! they HAVE their own internet system PLEASE GOD.

even if it’s in the utmv i still think they’d use a monster version. because twitter is literally just. all humans. youtube? absolutely not (but it’s one of the easier ones to stomach). human animes that fall down, sure. human vinyl records that are able to be played? alright, cool. but NOT TWITTER please god. the bad sanses would use some multiversal monster net but they’re WAR CRIMINALS they would NOT BE ABLE TO DO THAT because the stars would track them DOWN and their accounts would probably be banned. they could make an alt account with a fake persona though i guess or just be lurkers. that’s chill. but nightmare probably wouldn’t even LET THEM!!!

dream and nightmare would not care for the multiversal undernet!!! ink maybe would but he’d update once a year because he’d forget it exists and not care enough to write it down when he has a lot of other things to do!!!! swap is the only one i can genuinely realistically imagine using the multiversal undernet

AND FOOD BRANDS. “he got lays chips” THIS ISNT A FOOD COMMERCIAL AND THEY DONT EAT HUMAN FOOD AND LAYS IS A HUMAN BRAND. whatever, i get exclusively raiding/purchasing surface groceries. but would they at least go to some post true pacifist au where monster food is readily available in grocery stores??? where they can eat magic-dense food that doesn’t provide needless waste their bodies aren’t built to handle??? and wouldn’t they be MONSTER RUN BUSINESSES because they are made of magic that HUMANS DONT HAVE AND CANT HARNESS!!! AND THUS NOT HAVE LAYS FUCKING CHIPS AS A NAME. THIS ISNT AN ADVERTISEMENT. JUST SAY CHIPS. PLEASE

you know what. if you really want you can have brand foods but at least MENTION that it’s human food. and it’s possibly their only option. or maybe there’s a monster branch for it post pacifist!!! that could WORK!!! but I cannot handle “Kraft mac and cheese” NO!!!! i want to read a FANFICTION of MAGIC SKELETONS THAT DONT EXIST IN THE REAL WORLD!!!! with STUPID FICTIONAL BRANDS THAT EXIST FOR MONSTERS!!!!! THE REASON THAT FRISK IS LIKELY HEALED BY FOOD OUTSIDE OF GAMEPLAY MECHANICS IS LIKELY BECAUSE THE FOOD IS MAGIC AND ENERGY DENSE AND SERVES THE PURPOSE OT INVIGORATING RHE CONSUMER!!!!!

[bbyquokka]

my soul mate is my cat

pairing: lee minho x gender-neutral reader

genre: angst with a comfort ending – MDNI

synopsis: you adopt a cat to help ease the pain realising he is similar to someone you once held close to you

warnings: animal adoption, mental health, loneliness, unable to care for oneself, soft ending, soul mates, reincarnation

words: 1.7k ~ (1,704)

♡ m.list — ♡ you can also read it on my ao3

dont repost. dont translate. minors, ageless & default blogs; dni! feedback and reblogs are highly advised and appreciated!

“why don't you adopt a cat!” you look up at your best friend and laugh.

“a cat?” you scoff. “seriously?”

your best friend nods and grins before taking a sip of their spirit. you're both out on a best friend date, eating at a local café whilst catching up on life.

“why not? cats are easy to take care off!” 

“i can hardly look after myself let alone an animal.” you chuckle softly.

“oh c'mon yn! are you not lonely since.. well, y'know..” you swallow as your best friend trails off. you let out a sad sigh as you look down at your pastry, suddenly feeling nauseous and the pastry looking unappetizing.

you have noticed that the days are long but the nights are even longer. since being alone, your apartment has felt twice the size of what it usually is. you haven't become lazy per say but the appeal of washing dishes and doing laundry just drains you the more you think about it, causing a pile to build and build until it becomes unmanageable. everything just reminded you of him, of minho. you hated being in the same four walls for that exact reason but you feared that if you left, you’d forget so you willingly trapped yourself.

you'd worry you'd forget about his smell. how he sounded. how he dressed. you still have all his belongings, scared and refusing to throw them out or give them away. every item of clothing still holds his scent, that scent that brings you so much comfort yet such sadness. everything of his still sits on your dressing table. photos, trinkets, dried up flowers, expired amusement park tickets–they're all memories.

nothing has quite been or felt the same. you went from being incredibly loved and being in love by an amazing and wonderful human to feeling nothing. just an empty shell walking and breathing. the only reason you are out right now is because your friend practically barged into your home unwelcomed, forced you to get dressed and dragged you out.

you can't deny that it feels nice to be outside again. the wind on your skin, the chirps of the birds and the buzz of pedestrians however, that part of you just wants to go home and bury yourself under heaps of blankets.

“c'mon yn. i think it'd be good for you. if not, at least think about it.” 

and think about it you do. as you wander around your apartment, all you can think about is a cat wandering around your home. maybe having a fluffy companion would do you some good. maybe it would bring you back and light that spark that's been extinguished.

the more the think about it, the more you want it. a sudden burst of energy rips through your body as you clean up your home. putting laundry in the machine, cleaning up dishes and throwing away trash. you bleach and disinfect every surface in your home, scrubbing until you can see your reflection in the counter tops. 

once that was done, you venture off to the pet store to grab the necessities. cat tree, scratching post, food and water bowls, litter box and litter alongside some food, treats and toys. maybe you overspent and the cat wouldn't use half of what you bought but it's better to be safe than sorry.

you made sure you home is cat friendly, feeling like you're baby proofing the apartment. you tuck away any loose cables, hide anything that could be potentially swallowed and cause harm. you haven't even decided if you want a cat or a kitten but either way, you will know once you come face to face with the animals.

“hi. i'm looking to adopt a cat.” you say to the shelter worker. you walked to your local shelter knowing it's better to adopt than to shop. they smile at you before asking you some questions and filling out some paperwork before leading you to the kennels.

there, you see a whole array of animals. puppies, kittens, dogs, cats. some old, some new. some frightened and some jumping all over the place with excitement. your heart melts but at the same time drops. seeing all these animals in kennels that have been abandoned and are waiting for their forever home, makes you wish you could just scoop them all up and take them home.

but for now, you can only pick one.

as you walk along the kennels, cooing and sighing at the adorable faces of the many breeds of dogs and cats, do you stop at one in particular.

you squat down as the cat stands from its resting place, uncurling itself and stretching out its stale limbs. it's a black, long coat cat with white around it's paws making it look like it's wearing socks. a little white moustache and white chest with long whiskers and pointy ears with tuffs of fur at the tips.

“hi.” you whisper as you put your hand up close to the metal. the cat sniffs your fingers, its pink nose twitching with each sniff before headbutting and rubbing its head on the bars. you stroke the back of its neck gently, heart melting as it starts to purr loudly.

“i want this one.” 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

it's been a few weeks since you adopted the cat, who's name is lee. lee was wary at first, hiding in the bathroom and nervous of its new surroundings and new noises. you spent time sitting outside the bathroom door trying to gently coax him out of the bathroom and let him know that he is safe.

soon enough, he gingerly stepped out off the bathroom, rubbing his head and body on your legs and hands as he would beg for attention. once lee knew he was safe did he show you his true side.

you learnt that he is a very playful yet stubborn cat. you'd catch him on the counter top (or even on top of the fridge) every time you tell him down, he would look at you and groom himself. you can't do anything about it though; he's a cute cat!

as you both slowly get accustomed to one another do you start to notice traits; traits that are all to familiar to you.

the slow blinks, the stubbornness, the playfulness. how he would meow at you when asking specific questions. the head tilts and the sudden swat of his paw on your hand; it's hard to explain to others but to you, you just know

it's a feeling you're all too familiar with. it's habits and traits you know far too well. you didn't want to believe it at first but now you're forced to. you even went as far as showing him a picture to which he nudged at and purred–like he is trying to tell you something.

you watch as he slowly sits up and stretches from your lap. your eyes widen at a distance mark on his fur in the same place as someone who was once close to you. lee looks at you and gives you slow blinks and purrs loudly as your eyes slowly full with tears.

“you're just like him, yknow.” you whisper. lee continues to give you soft blinks before gently placing his white paw on your cheek, his toes beans feeling soft yet firm against your skin. his fur soaking up your tears before he leans in and gently licks your cheek. his scratchy tongue swiping along your cheek as he gives you kisses to which you giggle at and hold him close to your chest.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“i'm not crazy.” you protest to your friend over the phone. “i swear, they're just like him!” 

“yn.. i know you miss him but that's impossible.”

“is it? i mean, don't you believe in the whole afterlife thing? y'know, being reborn and whatnot.”

“not particularly, no. it's just bizarre how you think that. are you ok, yn? like, really really ok?” you sigh deeply, rubbing your face with your hand.

“peachy. look, i know i sound crazy but it's true. it's just everything lee does is so alike to him. since adopting him, i feel more alive! like i have a purpose.”

“and that's great yn! but to say he is exactly like him is a little bizarre don't you think?” 

“well, yeah but– ah, never mind. look, i have to go. talk to you soon.” you hang up with a defeated sigh. of course they wouldn't believe you. you wouldn't if someone told you what you told your friend. they would have to see it to believe it; but even then, would they?

you drag your feet to your bedroom, smiling as you see lee curled up on his side of the bed. you flop down on your stomach, disturbing lee from his nap. his head shoots up, a tired and disapproved meow causing you to laugh softly.

“sorry darling. i didn't mean to wake you.” lee puts his head back down before letting out a big yawn. his ears twitching and soft purrs emitting as you gently pat his soft and silky fur.

“maybe i am a little crazy.” you say with a soft chuckle. “could you not give me a sign or something? i'll take anything at this point.” 

lee looks at you before getting up off the bed and walking out. you watch with a sad smile feeling defeated and your heart weighing you down.

moments later, lee walks back into the bedroom. he jumps up on the bed and drops a piece of clothing by your face. it's a sock but not just any sock–it's his favourite sock.

you sit up, holding the sock close to your chest as tears stream down your cheeks. you let out broken sobs as lee stands on his hind legs, front paws on your arms as he reaches up. you laugh softly, leaning down to allow him to lick your cheek slowly and gently to soothe you.

you scoop him up and nuzzle into his soft furr, getting it wet with your tears. lee endures it, purring softly and rubbing his face against your cheek.

“it's really you.” you whisper. “welcome back, my love.” 

note: idek. i saw a tiktok ok and it prompted me to do this. i have no words, sdjn;aslfb! don’t forget to leave feedback, reblog and tell me what you think here. curious as to what is next? here is my wips list! i hope you all enjoy! ‹3

tags (open): @sstarryoong ; @fairylouist ; @septicrebel ; @alyszaen ; @writerracha ; @hyunluvxo ; @aestheticsluut ; @xcookiemonsteer ; @telesvng

[complete-clownery]

Okay I wont get to work on this any longer tonight so imma just post this

So this morning I have realised some stuff about my Macaque home hc

So first of all you can see the human disguised Macaque with Bai He,

and so Bai He wasnt there or "planed into the house" three days ago, but I decided that, that just wont do, I want her with Macaque, so im going to have to go back and alter my original ideas so it would fit the concept of Bai He also living there with Macaque (I have quit a lot of ideas for that, but ill get to them when I have the time)

But its not the main reason I wanted to talk about this even with half finished ideas under constructuion in my head

The big thing you already saw the random old lady and the antic Store/shop, so its no suprise im going to talk about that a for a bit,,, not a lot tho cuz I dont really got the energy for this

Soo--- She does not have a name, but Ill work on that, shes not fully thougt out, but nothing really when it comes to my ideas and headcanons (its kinda like eating halfbaked dough)

so shes 73 years old divorced lady running a little antic shop in the outer cirkles of Megapolis. I was thinking maybe it was her who originally selled the whole building to Macaque and rented the free space under the dojo.

She has a daughter and a grandkid (didn't decide on gender yet)

Shes kinda inspired by @/ladygreenfrisbee's oc in the fanfiction sunbreak, a snarky but sweet old lady whos not taking any shit from the brooding, shadow the hedgehog wannabe.

When she was younger she worked in a Museum in Megapolis, working with antient historical artifacts and megical weapons, but she pretty much knew everything about anything in there, with history and old stories being one of her passions,

Thus after she retired she decided to open and antic store. Even tho its an antic store, she can be one of those people that you bring an old piece of furniture or object in and they can tell you if its legit or not. She is also willing to trade and buy stuff from you if its to her likings. She's fair and not a con artist, she has just enough money for herself and thats completely fine by her, shes a simple woman when it comes to living.

She has a ton of degrees, Dr. And Phd tytels and what nots, extreamly smart and knows a lot about history and mytology and different eras of the past, making it easier for her and Macaque to connect over old stuff.

Also I was thinking, even tho she couldnt tell that Macaque was the Six Eared Macaque himself, she knew that they were wearing glamours, She studied artifects and worked with demons who were experts on the field of magics and glamours, she knows her shit

And even tho She had a decent relationshipp with Macaque I dont think Macaque would willingly let her see his true form, maybe after he was very exhausted, and injured after a fight they couldnt hold it up and were like-- fuck it who cares (maybe it was after the final fight with LBD) and she obviously knew who they were imidietly seeing his Six ears (that even tho he let her see one time hé continued to glamour like he would usually, only letting go of their human disguise)

So after that she would start asking him a whole lot of questions about the past and what was it like, carefully avoiding the questions involving the great sage equal to heaven, cuz she knew what happend from jttw

But yeah Macaque found it funny how a child and an old lady are looking at him with similar shimmer to their eyes as they interrogate him on the past

She loves a good tea and has her own little blends that calm the nerves and ease muscle pain and stuff like that. After She and Macaque became more friendly with eachother she gifted them some tea that helps him fall asleep better and relax. Macaque checked them for poison twice and couldnt find anything, but still wasnt willing to drink from them until he had a very fucked up breakdown yippeee ✌️

After Macaque lived there for some years they somewhat warmed up to eachother, they would hold little tea paties and talk about stuff (annoying husbands and divorce) after Bai He started living with Macaque these tea parties increased in numbers, sometimes the ladys grandchild joining in when Grandma was watching over them, maybe they get along well with Bai He, maybe they had a rocky begining to their friendshipp, but they warmed up to eachother and now are pretty good friends (maybe, ill think about it more)

BUT!!! this was it for now its already 2:40 am and im waking up at 6:40 so even tho I have more to say ill be going now

Bye thank you for reading ✌️☺️

[fatuismooches]

ITS ALMOST VALENTINES DAAY yippe!!!!

I know Dottore + the segments dont really care for holidays but I like to think Valentines day is one of those exceptions because they KNOW they are going to get spoiled. They all glance at reader (who is oblivious) discreetly as the day approaches.

And when the day arrives they're barely able to focus on their tasks because they can already smell the chocolates from the kitchen. Reader had to lock the door to the kitchen for OBVIOUS reasons.

sidenote: I just had the adorable idea that foxttore will claw/paw at the door like a dog😭 and the pufflings will try to squeeze under the door. Reader probably has to put a rag under the door to stop them.

When reader finally finishes baking and presents it to all the Dottys they are so joyous.... the older ones might be more quiet about their happiness but the younger ones are DEVOURING those sweets.

I like to think Reader also baked some trears for Foxttore and the pufflings... :D

(Sidenote:Reader baked a special batch for Zandy because he's spoiled)

ALSO im glad u like my ramblings 😭 I get very joyous when I see a new dottore post...

- 🐓

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH... Ah you've sealed your fate the moment you decided to spoil them on the first Valentine's Day spent together! You simply can't set the standards so high and then not go through with it, nope, unless you want a bunch of mopey and grumpy segments on this day of love. (You weren't planning on such a thing anyway thankfully. But somehow you don't notice how touchy they are before the day. Specifically the younger ones. The older ones are beyond that. But I guess they think they could possibly butter you up to give them a few more chocolates... Unfortunately, you're still oblivious and just return their kisses tenfold.)

Not only do you lock the door, but you have to threaten to never make them chocolates again if they dare break this rule... well obviously you'd never actually do that but apparently they're not willing to risk that possibility... very, very strange segments. If only they could behave themselves, they could hug you from behind as you baked... Though of course, Zandy is allowed in because he's a good little boy! Sometimes he helps you or he's just there to keep you company! (You have to keep Zandy's special batch in your room and have him sneak over so you two can eat it together in secret... otherwise, the segments would find out and that would not be fun...)

YESSS FOXTTORE AND THE PUFFBALLS TRYING TO BREAK IN... no poor Foxttore would just give up and sit outside the door all huffy and sad... its favorite human has betrayed it!! but the pufflings, they would have infiltrated the kitchen already, they were there hidden inside the cabinets and under the stove the night before. The ones that weren't there yet just squeezed themself through some other crevice... eventually, you just get them all in and Foxttore is very very happy :3 Its fur coat unfortunately may get a bit messy with the chocolate... you will have to give it a bath later. (I can just imagine, you will turn your back for a few seconds, and then you turn back around to see Foxttore guilty with his paw in the bowl of chocolate...)

Reader would definitely customize the boxes of chocolates for the segments... they would make sure to note down the kind of chocolate they prefer, what kind of fillings they like, etc... and the older segments who have a taste for more bitter chocolates too... :D Not to mention the little notecard with to: and from: [name]...

And let's not forget about our dearest Dottie... he would want to taste more chocolates even after they're done, and to do so, he would simply kiss you repeatedly, savoring the lingering taste of the delicious sweetness on your lips. Yes, he's never cared for Valentine's Day, but when it's like this, he supposes it's not all that bad.

[countphallus]

What are ur basic Ticci Toby headcanons? like with personality, outlook, physical appearance, etc.?

Unfortunately I have artblock right now but i have thought of this a lot since he used to be my favorite creepypasta :D

Ticci Toby Headcanons

We're going off slendermansion here, though I dont think thatd be the case

I headcanon Toby as ftm he/him and being very skinny. I don't think he eats a lot due to never getting the feeling of hunger, and because things like basic self care are just chores to him. Not like he has anything better to do, but you know

I imagine he picks at his skin, chews his fingernails, pulls hair, etc. What used to be anxious habits are just regular habits now.

Very introverted. More talkative with the more 'normal' creeps but i think all the proxies aside from Brian have a sort of "better than you" thing going on with the othet pastas. Not only are they 'the favorites' but they used to be undeniably human and still look and act to be so. I think Toby just doesn't feell he'd relate to ones like BEN or laughing jack.

When it comes to human pastas, such as Jeff, he doesn't like to talk to him or be around him. Ones like that are a reminder of what he could become.

Nina however is one of the most human pastas there are when it comes to her personality and outlook. For this reason her and Toby get along. Toby is generally very excitable when he's not being miserable.

He and the rest of the proxies are whatevsr with each other. Toby definitely likes then more than some others, but they're coworkers.

Also I think Toby definitely has self harming/suicidal tendencies. As dark as it is, for the most part not a lot of the group cares because A) i dont think proxies can die and B) they kill people for a living they dont give af

However eyeless jack i can imagine caring about toby a lot for some reason. Probably because he used to be a med student so helping Toby reminds him of those days.

Toby's surprisingly optimistic or at least tries to be. He doesn't say this outloud though, almost like it'll be jinxed. He also spends most of his time in his room either painting(i think he paints :D) or picking at scabs. None of his scabs ever really heal. I think he's missing a finger as well. Hatchets, you know?

[tomwaterbabies]

Hi there 👋 I'm also here to ask more about the robot au. Does Donella know about Varian being Ulla's perfect robot? Or does Hugo tell her about Varian when he initially finds out? I'm curious as to whether Donella plans to take apart Varian to learn more of Ulla's secrets.

How does sleeping and eating work for Varian? Does rain or being immersed in water affect him? Does his energy come from magic or science? (Like is he solar powered, or is there a magic energy source keeping him working?)

What are Yong and Nuru's reactions to realizing Varian is a robot? After finding out he himself is a robot, does Varian ever try to communicate to other robots, even the rogue ones, to stop them or to test if they are as sentient as him? Are there other sentient robots besides Varian, or is he the most advanced? I imagine Varian not only dealing with an existential crisis but feeling out of place with both people and robots (not human enough to be human, but too advanced to be labeled another robot).

Also any other fun robot quirks of Varian?

Sorry if it's a lot of questions.

im spinning in circles throwing lots of confetti all around u if u dont like confetti imagine its something else its something u like

currently i am Undecided on if donella knows what varian is. either way she would definitely find out, and i think it would probably be from hugo IF she doesnt know already. im actually going kind of insane about the idea that she wants to take him apart so i'll be real with you that is now part of this au. thank u. hugo would not know about this specific goal donella has

because he is meant to perfectly integrate with humans, most things are normal for him! his system, while synthetic, still works Mostly like a biological human. water doesnt really have an effect on him BUT i think he was programmed with a "fear" of cold weather to avoid being in the snow too much because it can damage him a little bit (excessive cold has a negative effect with his system)

his energy source is partially magic and partially science! the reason he is sentient is he does, truly, have a soul. this isnt really fully understood by him at first (and the source of much angst, naturally), but the reality is the magic that ulla harnessed was the ability to give him life. as for the rest of his energy- he's mostly solar powered! it helps that he lives in corona, the light kingdom. out on the road he's usually able to still stay energized- but i can imagine times where all energy sources are getting depleted and he acts a little loopy (its fun)

yong and nuru definitely are, well, shocked? like it is an insane thing for anyone to witness. but despite their confusion they definitely still care deeply for him. yong in particular is inquisitive about varian's robot-ness, i think that can get a little uncomfortable for varian sometimes but he knows he means well

i think the gang would at some point try and find ways to communicate with the other robots via varian! im unsure currently if that would ever be successful, but it would absolutely be something they'd try considering how varian's existence is basically the Key to a lot of this. that being said, while they probably dont know for sure, i can say that varian is the only sentient robot- unless you count what ulla did to herself (uploading her consciousness/soul basically lol. scary AI mode)

"not human enough to be human, but too advanced to be labeled another robot" obsessed with this btw. yeah..... You Get It. in general varian's character desperately trying to find his place is a super important element to me- so it manifests in the robot au like this exactly. but being with yong, nuru, and hugo eventually leads to him finding kinship with them. which, i think, is pretty similar to the regular version of vat7k (where he doesnt find himself within corona OR his mother's extended family- but instead with this group of weird nerds). varian might always struggle with his lack of human traits and his humanity that other robots dont have- but his friends and family, who are notably weird and unique in their own ways too, certainly help get rid of those bad feelings and reassure him

as for fun robot quirks... oh most definitely. remind me later (<- im telling myself this too) to talk about them bc i already made this way too long and listing off Fun Robot Quirks Of Varian is gonna make this even longer ksjdfhsd

here's one for now: when he gives hugs he can sometimes cause someone's hair to go puffed up from the static electricity. this also includes kisses but how will they Ever find that out :)

[alphaketoglutaricacid]

the way he came real close to one of laios desperate plans while sleep deprived and hangry several chapters in advance.. he really does know laios huh.

my tags got too long so here they are under the cut

Even tho he wanted to sleep he probs was still listening to everything laios has to say. Bc he is Always Listening and Observing

Interesting in the context of how laios wants someone to understand him - to see him as he is but also the ways in which hes afraid of rejection and being seen as less than human but lacking the monstrousness to retaliate and lash out without regret bc then it would be The natural order of things but hell never be a monster he can only be a human being

but i think part of the reason shuro got so mad is bc he was putting all this effort into being considerate and feeling he got none in return. i think he wanted to be seen too! But i think he overlooked how he feels safe enough to express his rawest feelings w laios

But also i think laios was the first relationship shuro did not just let fizzle out at the first sign of interpersonal difficulty. bc lbr in this manner hes a coward. Disgusted by maizuru being his fathers mistress ? Dont talk it out n continue letting her treat him like a child while ignoring her. concerned hien and him will turn out like maizuru and his father—just let the friendship drift apart w time. concerned abt how inutade views her retainership when he knows his father just sees her as an oddity—dont say shit n just stew in it 5eva

passive aggression warrior!!!

Also interesting laios is like if we can make her monstrousness more manageable maybe she can live among ppl…the projection

The part at the end where toshiros like I know his gait from the sound of the bell by heart so i 100% know its him. he was listening the whole time! like a second heartbeat. Very metaphorical for their relationship. its a challenging relationship for the both of them but they dont give it up bc they care about each other.

thats love honestly i was genuinely moved by the interplay of toshiro laios n kabrus relationship. that laios promises hell eat w kabru on his terms even tho kabru wasnt upfront abt the monster thing initially giving him a motive to return. and how shuro gave him the bell as a promise hed bring him back to the surface no matter what. And he fulfills it even when laios leaves the bell behind bc he knows him so well To the surface and live among other ppl.

bc laios whole life he felt like he couldnt understand other ppl and they couldnt understand him even tho he wanted that connection that seemed so easy to everyone else

but thru kabru and shuro we see that no one in the world understands anyone else completely- thats why they enter the story w awful first impressions. As well as like well. Thats probs how laios comes off to other ppl

shuro calls him back bc the two as his peers are like u already have connections who value you (shuro) and deep connections youve yet to make w ppl who will be important to u going forward (kabru) and theyll both challenge and change deep seated issues about themselves to keep their connection w u alive

[ceoandslutler]

I admire how the death threats and mean comments dont get to you, you're so strong for that

i wouldn't really say i'm strong as much as i am lucky, fortunate and privileged enough to have an enriched life where i have so much good in it that a death threat or some online insults don't really do much to me.

anyway my tips on not letting this shit get to you:

1) go out w friends, family, anyone you know, etc... i know not everyone has the freedom to do that but a free/cheap outing with someone you like hanging out with is a life changer! if you don't have anyone, go out and try to find people. volunteer, speak to classmates/coworkers, invest time into new hobbies, join clubs/hobby groups, etc...

2) we all have people we look up to, right? see how they deal with hardship. i was watching a salon drip ep with bts member jin in it and he said something along the lines of: "i just say, 'it's okay/it's bound to happen because im a superstar' whenever something bad happens." that's my mindset. it's okay because i'm happy, healthy and doing something with my life. bad things are bound to happen if i put myself out there. i have people online who like to read my bullshit. i have friends who go out with me. i have a family who love me. i don't need to care about what some anti shipper says. the fact they compared me to p diddy when i literally just go to uni, work, do assignments, eat, sleep and play all day is crazy. can't take it seriously when i examine my own life and i just see a normal person.

3) try to win the dgaf war. i am not kidding. do not give a fuck. i say to myself: "whoever is writing this shit is more miserable than you will ever be because you haven't reached the pathetic point in life where you tell people to die because they ship something." then i move on and listen to seaside rendezvous and drink some cheap wine.

overall, just live life with your heart full, i know mental illness, physical illness, chronic issues keep a lot of people tired and tormented but just trying to live is enough. keep pushing, don't listen to sickos. just say "it's okay because i'm a human being" and this happens to everyone. we all have people who don't like us, will be mean to us for practically no reason and bad days that bring us down. what's important is just trying to live, love your life as much as you can and usually life will try to love you back.

[mochinomnoms]

IM CRYING I GOT SICK SO I DONT FEEL WELL😭😭😭😭 Still I'll push through and get these Valentine's scenarios to you!!! You might get the other two a bit later tho so sorry!!!

Azul would definitely make sure to give you your gift first. He has done extensive research and came to Ramshackle with a bouquet of your favorite flowers! Though Valentines wasn't foreign to him, the way humans celebrated was a bit different! Then he'd take you to the town on the island, because somehow he got permission from Crowley!

It was with a bribe

........

At least you think so? But you got to go and have a great time on the rest of the island so who cares? He took you to multiple shops and then to the beach after. When you got back to campus you both went to his dorm. And it confused him to no end when you told him to wait while you ran off towards the dorms kitchen. He waited like an hour until you came out. He was a little annoyed but he couldn't go into the kitchen since the twins were keeping guard of the door as he heard sizzling. Hands down you enter the room with a, "Missed me?"

He'd question why you took so long but little did he know you ALSO did your research! Leading him to his own VIP room you'd explain nothing to him and watch as he blushed and tried to get answers from you. I mean why go to such a private room on such an intimate day? He's embarrassed even more as some other dorm members walk past him, a blushing mess, being tugged into his private office.

Not to mention your teasing the entire way there with hand holding and little pecks! He wouldn't say it out loud (7 forbid the tweels hear him) but he loves your affection just as much as it embarrasses him! And sevens, does it embarrass him!

When you get to the room the foods already set up! Courtesy of the twins. He knows the food was made by you, why else would you be gone for an hour!? and is kinda nervous for two reasons.

He's not too sure you can cook

2. Gifting food (for octo-mers) is usually part of their courting process

And I mean, yeah sure he's already dating you and everything but it feels really intimate! And it gets even more so when you lift the fork and bring it to his lips. (sorry to the people who CAN cook) But it seems Azul was right about questioning your culinary abilities.... Its kind of charred around the edges too, not a lot but to someone who's skilled at cooking its hard to not notice.

"Its burnt!" Azul laughs light heartily even though he still takes a bite.

"Yeah well its made with love, not skill," you reply sarcastically. As he eats his fill he makes comments about how he wants to avoid getting chubby, which you quickly dismiss saying you'd love him however he looked. To be completely honest he practically melts into your side on the couch. Its cute how shy he gets with this, and he seems to be leaning in more to your touch more.

Idk how to end this so HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!! I hope you enjoyed and I'll finish the other ones soon!!

-✨👀

Happy Valentine's Day (late, sorry baby I got busy yesterday until night time)

This is so cute! I love it! Food is def my love language, so I would love cooking a meal for Azul!! It's such an intimate thing to hand feed your partner...Azulito let me feed you 😭

Thank you for the gift my love! I appreciate it! Maybe in the future I can write a series on food as a love language with the twst cast!

[nevadancitizen]

-> PERFECTLY PORTIONED (TO BUTTERFLY & RECTIFY YOU)

synopsis: ghost hungers. it’s the type of hunger where he knows his stomach is shrinking, borderline digesting itself just for a sliver of satiation. he wants rigor mortis, mold and mildew, and, above all, carnage. it’s a problem. but ghost can’t bring himself to care, because you’re under him, breathless and struggling on his makeshift butchering table.

word count: 2.1k

characters: yandere! cannibal! ghost, victim! reader

trigger warnings: THIS IS JUST STRAIGHT TORTURE PORN (no sexual content, torture porn is just called that. for some reason.) torture (physical + psychological), graphic depictions of violence, implied cannibalism, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT

notes: dont look at me. first time writing this kinda stuff (⸝⸝⸝>﹏<⸝⸝⸝) i promise im normal i promise im normal i pretty promise. anyway here's a teaser -- i don't want to post the full fic on tumblr :P

Simon has always thought of himself as more of a beast than a man, especially when he dresses himself as Ghost and drenches himself with all the gore he amasses. 

But sometimes, the lines blur between Simon and Ghost. Sometimes he doesn’t want to be Simon, and falling back into the plush comfort of being a killer is too tempting. Ghost barely feels, and when he does, it’s typically the recoil from his gun. He’s not some hero the pro-military propaganda makes the ones like him out to be. He doesn’t blink when blood spurts across his face. He’s not normal. 

Simon used to be someone to return to when off-duty. He was a good, decent, normal human being. He did everything he could to avoid hurting people. 

But Simon isn’t here anymore. All that remains is Ghost.

LINK TO FULL FIC HERE (EXTERNAL AO3 LINK)

[unexpectedbrickattack]

Okay so i know this is your askbox and everything but I want to say that i feel like the bosses would start to hate pizzahead after peppino tells them what he was planning on doing, because as far as I know they were simply hired to guard the keys and look out for peppino.

I have some very minor tweaks to this but for the most part i agree!

put under a readmore bc i dont wanna clog up any potentially Non-Exploded pt tags lmao

-Pepperman, the eccentric man that he is gets shown 1 (one) image of a fucked up drawing of peppino and hes like ‘yes yes fat little human man, got it.’ And continues sculpting as if he hadnt heard pizzahead at all. Hes the MOST startled when peppino enters his arena bc he literally forgot he had to fight him 😭 hes like WHO is this little sweaty human in my fucking ART STUDIO????!! and then immediately gets stomped.

He is definitely indifferent to pizzahead; he didnt really care about this weird man and even postgame hes like well. This sly dog led me straight to my muse so I cannot be too angry with him 🤔

-Vigilante is like ‘hmm. Never seen this man round these parts; whatd he do?’ And pizzahead is like if you need a reason; its no longer just a simple request; its a bounty. And Vigilante it like ‘well... A bountys a bounty; if he wanders into my town he aint comin back out’ and pizzahead is like great! Fantastic! Im holding you up to that 🧡

Vigilante is probably the one most angry about pizzahead. Hes not exactly lawful good but he does Not like being used as Hired Muscle. He hunts down Bad People; not a human some weirdo has a personal vendetta against. He doesnt know exactly WHAT that vendetta is but its not worth his time and its not worth getting his cheesy ass handed to by Peppino again 😭

-The Noise craves violence and destruction. Hes a little menace! He also likes money. LOTS of money. And lucky for him, Pizzahead had seemingly Infinite Funds. Funds that he used to hire the Noise; to utilize this brats WEALTH of questionable tools and contraptions in case Peppino climbed his way through the tower. The noise was like ‘ur hosting this shitshow on TV? give me a 40/60 split from whatever ur filming and you have a deal’ and he does NOT find it troubling at all that Pizzahead is so eager to accept this.

He never figures out that the recorded content was never actually hosted anywhere. He eventually tries searching it up, asking his agents to look up anything recent with his face in it but they all come up emptyhanded. When asked about a name or title or scheduled tv slot and publishing, hes a bit sheepish to admit he never asked. Thats not his job! Thats his agents job! Hes so weirded out though; Pizzahead gave him a Ton of money. Obviously not alot by the Noise’s standards but more than what most people could even remotely afford. Weird. Well he got money and Peppino doesnt try to kill him unless he ignores the restraining order placed on him so its okay ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-Fake peppino cant really comprehend hate. But he does comprehend…distrust. A man comes up to him, gives him a picture of some human, asks him to make sure this human does NOT make it to the top of the tower- ‘nononono. Listen to me. He does NOT make it past you. Do you understand that? I am serious. If you see this man come by your sorry excuse for a shop, kill him. Maim him. Eat him; i dont care WHAT you do as long as he does Not get this fucking key.’

And Fake Peppino just nods. But hes so wary despite his dopey expression. Hes got little goosebumps prickling along the back of his neck as the man hands him the key and a picture of the human. A human that looks like him. JUST like him. In the back alley of his poorly lit pizzeria. Just like him…Hes a bit taller than the man in the picture but…just like him… just like him just like himjustlikehimjustlikehim- ‘Yeah, yeah, just like you, but listen- listen; hes messin' with My business and you gotta understand that, right? You have a business too! Whatever this…*gestures weakly* is. You would be. Sad. If someone destroyed your business. Right?’

A slow nod.

‘Exactly! See? Right on the same page! Thats why im countin on you!’

When Fake Peppino gets to see that Human Peppino has his own Pizzeria; a pizzeria that almost got destroyed (a BUSINESS just like his...) everything seems to click into place at once. Hed probably maul Pizzahead like a chimpanzee 😭 WHAMWHAMWHAM BASH THAT DOUGHY FACE IN !!!!!!! Peppino doesnt need the manpower, but its Nice to have the equivalent of a bulldog guarding his shop

[demisexual-in-distress]

Any *SHNIFFFFF* helluva and/or hazbin headcanons??? o-o

*AHEHEHEHEM* I CAN RANT YES UR SUMMONING MY INNER NERD (LONG) (SORRY THIS HAS BEEN ROTTING IN MY ASK BOX IVE BEEN DOING THIS FOR A WHILE NOW)

pls dont flop i spent way too many hours on this lol only doing 6 (six) from the main casts!!! And, sadly, no, Fizzarolli is not included, though I do love him dearly.

Helluva Headcanons:

Blitz:

frickin loves spirit

(saw this somewhere else not sure where) huge-ass horns scratch up his couch, hence the shitty tears

Makes sure to cherish Loona as much as possible on her bday bc of trauma from his childhood

Wants to be the parent possible to her also due to trauma (daddy issues :\)

Insecure about his scars :(

Lost Verosika because he adopted Loona in a last-ditch effort to save their relationship, but refused to get rid of her when V wasn't a fan

Eats anything and everything Brandon Rogers does (canon??) (such as cheese and hotsauce)

Told Barbie about his crush on Fizz before trying to tell Fizz himself

never grew out of bands he liked as a teen

Undiagnosed learning disabilites (dyslexia? he tries his best)

Poor education

(TW, S.A.) Stolas:

WATCHES EVERY TELENOVELA IN THE GODDAMN BOOK

Also enjoys musicals and constantly sings soundtracks while alone (projecting a bit)

Genuinely wants Via and Loona to hang out; wants some sort of father-daughter bond? with Loona, but isn't sure how to approach her

was verbally, physically, and sexually abused by Stella in their "relationship"

GREY'S ANATOMY

I think we all know this by now... Eyeliner.

Black sheep (canon?)

plays some sort of classical instrument idk (piano?)

PAINTS (happy little trees)

Big fan of Cruel Prince series yk

Big fan of fantasy in general

Nerds abt astronomy to Via

Adelle. No other words.

Wattpad user u can't convince me otherwise

Definitely neurodivergent

Millie:

Dyed Sallie Mae's hair when she transitioned, was a makeshift hairdresser for a little while (till Sal figured out how to do it herself)

Had a lot of pets as a child

Tries to stay in contact with all her siblings. Emphasis on tries.

Used to get homesick A LOT

Homeschooled

Ik it's a common one now, but babysat Loona while Blitz was in prison, leading to her and Moxxie meeting

THIS GURL CAN HANDLE HER DAMN DRINKS ‼️

Best homemade recipes by far

Has and will not hesitate to eat a bug once more

Very organized

Moxxie:

Likes to write

MUSICALS (canon) he loves phantom, les mis, and a gentleman's guide to love and murder (ahahhaem Bryce pinkham)

Has many hyperfixations! AUDHD

Loves kids, but gets overstimulated/overwhelmed when taking care of them

In severe need of validation due to trauma

Cat person

Out on a limb here but likes pottery

Bouncy leg stim yk

Panic! At the Disco led to his bi realization

Violinist just trust me

Loves mice for some odd reason

Gullible? Is that canon?

Can sketch pretty good!

Overwhelmed by loud noises and crowded spaces

Loona:

ACE SPECTRUM!!!!

Watches movies with blitz late at night as a tradition

Taught Blitz makeup tips for when he does his weird drag human disguise thing

follows 666 News on the hotel's strange journey

percussionistcore idk how else to say that

Knows EXACTLY how to deal with a hangover (ty blitz)

Social anxiety (might break this down in a seperate post cuz im in a ranty mood)

Has seen the show daria (or at least the hell version) (yall better kno wut im talking about)

Tries not to spend too much / is gentle with Blitz's bank account

Octavia:

Deep down, a sanrio girl is born

Nightcore bitches u already know

Very polarized when it comes to her relationship with stolas (canon?)

Has attempted to bring Stolas into her world - definitely shares her special interests with him, he tries his best to support

Plays at least ONE classical instrument bc she wanted to make Stolas proud :,) (never said she was good at it)

Very sheltered when it comes to Stolas and Stella's actual relationship toward each other

avid collector of taxidermy and other creepy things

She definitely knows those OG goth dances

Photography!!

Dr Martens do i have to say more

Hazbin Headcanons:

TW for Angel Dust and Niffty's (of all people), S.A. mentions.

Charlie:

YA sapphic romances!!!

Webtoon freak

Pinterest whore

Listens to Katy Perry + Hayley Kiyoko

Sanrio again!! Aggretsuko or Chococat r her favs

Can genuinely help people through tough times

Autism spectrum? a little out on a limb here, but she seems to have a hard time breaking down the psychology of sinning/sinners

Paints Vaggie's nails all the time

Vaggie was so her bi awakening; Seviathan and Vaggie were her only two relationships

CATS!!

LOVES Pixy Stix yk they're just straight up sugar

has a diary lol

ADHD

Vaggie:

feels so indebted to Charlie because of how much she took care of her after Falling

girl in red kind of sapphic

Struggles with self-worth

Definitely best exorcist girl on Adam's team

Lute was searching for a reason to get rid of her

brushes Charlie's hair idk

Candles. I don't know why

OPENS/CLOSES DOORS WITH THOSE HUGE ASS HIPS IDK ITS JUST RIGHT TO ME

Doesn't have the heart to tell Charlie when she's not fully correct on something

Origami

Wakes up at ungodly hours due to nightmares and anxiety, lock checks the hotel ALL THE TIME

honestly, tumblr user, silent reblogs

Alastor (sorry, most deal with his time alive):

Genuinely beginning to care for the hotel-- it scares him.

DADDY ISSUES + MOMMY ISSUES HE'S COLLECTED THEM ALL!!!!

Follow up: traumatic childhood

Mauled by dogs (is this still canon? Was this ever canon? DOES ANYBODY REMEMBER THAT???)

Knows the basics of technology, refuses to acknowledge it

Constantly playing jazz music from his radio in his room

Has a very vivid memory of his past, will not let himself forget it

Needs fucking glasses but that monocle don't do shit

Tea > coffee

Was convinced his asexuality was a flaw after being told so

Held onto Mimzy for the sake of nostalgia and memories of time alive

Insomniac

Nerd for jazz

Spoke some French as a child, though he isn't fluent

Husk's and Angel's get a bit detailed... I'm a slut for characters with such a vast possibility of headcanons

Husk (yeah I realize this won't make as much sense if you don't know all of his lore because of my obsession with him, I'll clarify what's already canon):

BLEEDS INTO ALASTOR, ALSO STRANGELY DETAILED: While alive, Husk played the saxophone professionally (canon). In his afterlife, as an overlord, he had one and continued to play bc us musicians r weird fucks who love to torture ourselves. Alastor knew he could play, and, being a jazz lover, LOVES that aspect of Husk. Just about the only thing he likes about him. Now, at the hotel, while he no longer plays, Alastor still brought his saxophone, which rots in Husk's closet.

Niffty's in his room ALL THE FUCKING TIME, it can't possibly get dirty

Doesn't make a mess to begin with--- husk hasn't personalized his room at all since he arrived, he doesn't know when Alastor will pull him out

Is used to that kind of travel anyways, since he did so much when he was alive (canon!!)

Never was that close to his parents-- they were busy with the (canon->) casino

Is (surprisingly) educated on LGBTQIA+ terms, labels, and knows about the most important landmark events in the community's history, he just prefers not to use labels for himself

Close to Niffty, has had conversations with her in Japanese (canonically speaks it) to prevent Alastor from understanding

Always wanted kids, knew he didn't have a stable enough life to have them and didn't want them to have a repeat of his own parents' absence in his childhood

MIXED RACE!! A bit of everything, I'd like to say

Had glasses when he was alive, where the fuck did they go in the afterlife

ACE SPECTRUM (previous post)!!! Demisexual & demiromantic (can u tell I'm projecting a lil???)

Hates KeeKee

Hates large crowds + loud noises, idk it speaks to me, especially with those big ass ears

I don't fully lean towards him being neurodivergent, though I do believe that Husk likes to have something to do with his hands as a form of stimming, if that makes sense

Alone most of his life

(TW, S.A.) Angel Dust (a lot of when he was alive):

Lived with Molly while alive

Was disowned when he got the courage to come out to his dad, fell out of the mafia and had to make a living for the first time ever

Wanted to be an actor, never got casted (while alive) due to being queer

Valentino romanticized his career, making him believe that he wouldn't always be the actor that he is

Career was also romanticized by the fact that he was finally accepted as gay

Performed in drag at gay bars

Borrowed dresses, makeup, other "feminine" things/accesories from Molly, who had a similar style

Isn't as up-to-date with technology and modern things as he seems to be

Tries to cover up both (slight) italian and New York(er?) accent, fails miserably

Had fish while alive (canonically loves fish lol)

Brother + father didn't attend his funeral

Met Cherri very close to when she arrived in Hell

learns more about media and pop culture from Cherri

Originally was in something like a relationship with Val, but it was more of S.A. than consenting sex after a while. When he began to disagree, this showed more prominently.

I don't have anything for Niffty except for one thing, so trigger warning once more. I believe that Niffty came from an immigrant family from Japan—half white. In the 50s, housewives got a bit stir-crazy from all the work they did, leading to hysteria, anxiety, depression, and other issues. In some situation where leaving the house was necessary, I believe one or multiple guys, possibly older, attempted to sexually assault Niffty. Asian girls, such as myself, that look like that "stereotypical" East Asian, young, small, etc., are fetishized. Niffty must've been little, judging by her form, and she was also an immigrant, and also a WOMAN—seen as lesser. In self-defense, she killed him (or all of them? I'm leaning toward it being multiple), having had enough. She was soon diagnosed with the housewife syndrome and lobotomized, meaning they gave her SEVERE brain damage, hence her twisted mind in the afterlife.

Overall, Niffty is a character that we don't know much about yet. Of course I'll write my own story over that. Playing with fandoms is just what I do. :) While I do genuinely believe the part about her being lobotomized will become canon, the rest is, again, just something that's been brewing in my head for a while. Maybe I'll incorporate it in my own writing, who knows?

I wanna see other headcanons in the reblogs and replies :D If this does well, I always have more!

[asmogorna]

Sorry to send another ask so soon (and idk if someones asked this already) but if you have any headcanons for Jon I'd love to hear them!

OK SO im really sorry it took me THIS long to get to this i quite literally.. forgot i had smth in my inbox woopsies. the reason i remembered is cause mootie posted some Spine hcs and i was like "woah"

alsooo im not good at putting my thoughts onto "paper" especially in english so you will have to excuse me

anywho my jon headcanons some sad some random /ref

First of all i think that his relationship with Peter Walter I would be far from close. he would be seen as the type of child who's both "too much mess to take care of" and "strong enough to take care of himself" if that makes sense. Peter did love him as his creation but would openly admit that he's not his proudest one, meanwhile Jon wouldn't feel much connection at all. he sympathized with his creator but only in a way he would with any other human being, there was more gratitude than love

Jon struggles with constant malfunctions and his mechanisms are a mess (partially because he gets himself in trouble all the time), so at one point Peter would get tired of fixing him so frequently, and tell him that he can just "walk some things off". That thought stuck to the bot and he would think of all of his malfunctions as slight inconveniences, i mean, he can still perform so why pay attention to the constant neck pain or powering up struggles ? it just became a habit and he kind of forgot that things like that shouldn't be ignored

After a long while when Peter Walter VI grew up enough to start learning more about how automatons work, Jon would be used as a "lab rat" (not really but its just what he himself called it) for young VI to practice fixing mechanisms. thats pretty much when he heard "Wait this cant be right" about his messed up physical state for the first time in a long while. little Peter didnt get to fix all of the things that were wrong with Jon's body, but he did manage to take care of some of them, which almost surprised Jon with how nice it felt to not hear pieces of broken gears rattle in his head every time he moved (who wouldve thunk)

ok now to more lighthearted stuff !!

Jon actually has a very strong bond with Sam ! He loves watching the mustached man work and sometimes follows him around, just enjoying his company. At first Sam thought that the tone-gold automaton was creepy and uncanny, but grew attached to him and his stupidity (/lh). i also think that Sam would be one of the few Walter workers who dont baby the Jon and actually treat him like they would treat any other robot :3

Also Jon just loves his robot family endlessly. shocker !! im not sure how explain it but i think hes the only one to look at other Walter automatons and go "bro i love them so much" at all times. in his head at least. obviously he teases them and argues with them but he wont think twice before accepting a hug from his siblings (except for Upgrade theyre rivals /j)

Speaking of Upgrade !! They feel the most sibling-ish to me (aside from Rabbit & The Spine) because they constantly poke fun at each other yet they still are willing to give each other help and comfort when needed. She once had to carry him all the way back to the Walter manor because they forgot to take some extra cans of crystal pepsi

Also Upgrade got in an accident once which caused her to have a fractured face for a couple of days, and Jon was there the entire time to comfort her and constantly tell her that shes still very pretty

Unlike with other robots, the food that Jon eats doesnt just fall through his uncovered jaw/run into his boiler or anything like this, instead it just. disappears. once he closes his mouth the food just vanishes into the unknown, yet Jon claims that he enjoys the process of "eating" (nobody knows how it works)

LITTLE GIRLS THAT GO TO SPG SHOWS LOVE HIM !! once the band finishes performing, he constantly gets pulled away by a small giggling pink-ish blob to join their tea party or hula hooping contest. thats why he has quite a knowledge on "girly" themes and educates other automatons on the matter

THATS IT FOR NOW TY FOR READING :3

[ladyowen]

It wasn't time that did it it

☆Joel&Ellie fanfiction, no plot, just a lot of fluff mixed with a dash of angst and hope.

☆TLDR: Ellie has flashbacks from Fedra school and thinks about her relationship with Joel and her friends, they all unite together to give her the best Jackson experience. Joel sings to Ellie and she figures out that they are intertwined in every universe

☆4,7k words

Settling into Jackson is proving itself to be much more difficult, than Ellie thought it would be.

Everyone has been sweet and kind to her, especially Joel. So fucking sweet and kind. And that was the fucking problem. Nobody has ever been so..nice to her, not ever. At least not for that long, without wanting something in return.

(Ellie didn't think that she could really count Riley, because the girl didn't have much choice than to be her roommate. And even tho they were bestfriends, Riley had still decided to leave her and fun away to join the Fireflies, even if she came back in the end, which was a mistake. Maybe if she had never returned to say her goodbies, she would still be alive and well. Riley was her first victim.)

And that was the thing, she didn't know what could Joel possibly want from her and honestly, she has been getting more and more anxious thinking about it every day.

The people from QZ that had raised her, did so just so she could join the community in the future and be in the workforce, they didn't waste any of their precious recourses for someone, that wouldn't be a future working prospect.

Marlene wanted to keep her alive just because of her imunity, she had kept her locked inside a room for observation, caring for her as if she was more of a lost puppy than a human being. She wasn't exactly mean to her, but not kind either.

Ellie was pretty sure, that nobody could ever love her for herself alone, without seeing her as the way to the cure, as an asset or for her body.

(She didn't want to think about David, but his words were still carved deep into her mind. The way his hands had grabbed her, his face tensed up in anger, the smell of the fire and how it felt when he...)

That was until Joel came along.

She was just a cargo for him at first, a job that needed to be done so that he could find his brother- and save the humanity. But he didn't leave her, not after Tess's death, not after he had found out that there wasn't any way to make a cure.

Suddenly she wasn't just a job to be done and get over, she felt important and loved for the first time in her whole life. She became important to him for some reason. At least enough that he had saved her, multiple times. Even when he had never said it out loud, or directly to her.

'When i went to pull the trigger, I-I flinched, Still dont know why.

Anyway, the reason im telling you all of this-

I know why you're telling me all this.

Yeah, I reckon you do.

So time heals all wounds, I guess.

It wasn't time that did it.'

(And maybe, maybe she had saved him too.)

Like right now, he was tolerating having her head in his lap, slowly stroking her hair with his rough fingers, while they were watching an old movie and eating popcorn. Not as a special treat, for something that she had managed to do or some accomplishment, but just because. Without any reason behind it.

The main problem was, that she was living for these moments, to be close to him, listening to his stories from the time before the cordyceps outbreak, she didn't want this to ever come to an end.

But nobody had ever kept her for this long yet, and she didn't know what the the price for that was. He never said anything about how she could pay him back, not a single word. He wasn't reminding her of how in debt she was to him every day, or that she wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for him.

It was much easier in the QZ, she didn't have to think about it there, the rules and expectations were set in stone and everyone knew about them. If you fuck it up, you find out and they will swiftly make you forget about ever doing it again.

Not only was that system very effective and worked almost perfectly, at least in her school.

She knew most of the punishments, some were harsher than the others but there were always consequences to her actions and she was definitely one of the most troubled kids.

(It didn't matter than it was mostly because of the constant bullying from teachers and other kids, or that she was truly trying her best but it was never good enough for anyone.)

(Ellie had imagined that joel would say something like that it was because they were assholes and just didn't care enough to truly get inside her little gremlin brain. But she was never brave enough to share that part of her live with him, too scared that by saying it he would think it through and decide that she was truly not worth it.)

Fuck around and find out, that was the unspoken rule that everyone knew there. No exceptions. It didn't matter if it was clearly an accident, or if someone else framed you for it, you still got the consequences.

The almost faded scars, that were all around her upper back and shoulders, were a clear reminder of it for some time now, but it didn't seem to be the same here in Jackson, or at least not with Joel.

There wasn't much time for him to really discipline her on the road, or even in the hospital. But even than he had never even tried to, other than making his annoyance clear to her and trying to frame Tommy to take her away.

(But he came back in the end, and that was more than any adult had done for her before.)

Even when she was really trying to imagine him punishing her, there wasn't reay any punishment that seemed to suit him. At least not the ones that she had went through in the QZ.

He didn't hit her, not even once. It wasn't like she enjoyed being hit, but she was more than used to it from the QZ. She wasn't exactly the strongest and when Riley left, that had made her into guite an easy target for the other kids. She didn't even count the adults, because that was normal. A few slaps here, some kicks there maybe even a whipping if she had crossed the line enough or when they've just felt like it.

But for some reason, he was proving himself to be more overprotective of her, guarding her from any harm that could possibly come across her way. She still didn't really know why, but it seemed like he was even glad for her clumsy and yapping company for some weird reason. Even tho he had never missed the opportunity to tell her how annoying she was or call her a brat, it never seemed to more than just a playful teasing.

"Your head is gonna explode from thinking so hard, kiddo. Your brain is not used to it." Joel was looking directly into her face now, instead of the movie, again with the stupid kind smile plastered on his face. He must have noticed that she was out of it long ago, but just didn't say anything until now.

Which was another thing, that would have gotten at least her fingers snapped by the ruler a few times in the QZ, but here it didn't seem to be such a big deal.

"Fuck off, old man. At least mine doesn't have just hundred years old spiderwebs in it." She was now smirking at him, quickly gaining back her composure. He seemed to be more amused by her words, than offended in any way.

"Little brat, watch the movie." That was just one of his nicknames, that seemingly appeared to come out of nowhere, right after his favorite 'kiddo.' Not that she was complaining in the slightest, even tho it wasn't the nicest one, it was hers.

And she never had anything that was trully hers until now.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Ellie was listening to Jesse's yapping about the new space movie, something about a big bang and aliens, that he had heard about last night from some new kid in their school, when the topic of punishments suddenly came up for the very first time from Cat.

They were tacked up the unused part of the barn, that now was more of as their secret base, where they were spending most of their time after school or just whenever they needed to get away from the adults.

"Can you even believe it, my mum is so freaking ridiculous, she decided to punish me because of the missed curfew yesterday." Cat was saying, clearly really annoyed by her mum.

And suddenly, Ellie was looking at her, her eyes almost popping out from her skull, scanning her from top to bottom, trying to find some kind of an injury or bruise from the punishment. But there wasn't anything visible, or at least not where she could see it.

No bruises on her face from slapping, no split lip from it either. The girl appeared to be moving just fine and not in pain, so the probability that she was whipped or cut were really slim, unless she was really good at covering it.

Cat didn't seem to notice Ellie's frantic checkup on her, too bussy complaining about her parents. And Jesse seemed to be too bussy explaining how the alien ship worked to care about how- borderline insane- she was looking.

"I wasn't even that late! Just half an hour. She's just so dramatic." There was an overemphasised sigh at the end of the sentence, before the girl threw herself back on the stack of old hay.

Ellie was pretty sure, that her heart was being really close to just jumping out of her chest at that moment, and running far away from there. She could feel the tight knot getting even tighter in her stomach, if that was even possible, before she managed to gather the courage to finally ask.

"How did..how did she punish you?" Ellie asked more quietly than usual, trying to stop her voice from trembeling. On one side, she really didn't want to know, but on the other she felt like she needed to know so she could prepare herself, because Joel would surely be at least similar in this like the other parents in Jackson.

(The fact that she had stayed past her curfew so many times without getting in trouble, didn't even seem to cross her mind, with how much she was focused on thinking about the perfect plan how to help out her friend.)

Her mind was fully running and she was imagining the worst case scenarios, from getting all of her rations taken away, to solitary containment for weeks on end.

She didn't know, how would the taking away rations really work in Jackson, because seemed to be more than plentiful there, but if that was the case, she could share hers.

Joel was always so worried about her not eating enough, so they have plenty of fresh food like eggs and vegetables in their fridge, even some snacks. Maybe she could just sneak in and take a little bit and he probably wouldn't even notice. It wouldn't be the first time, that she would have to steal food for herself or someone else.

Being fast and small- even tho it was mainly from malnutrition- were always one of her biggest advantages. She could sneak almost anywhere without being noticed, and there always was a tiny hiding spot, just big enough for her in the close proximity, somewhere where noone else would even try to fit in.

Or maybe, if it was really bad, she could hide Cat in her room. Or run away with her, maybe not out of Jackson but to somewhere safe. They could take some supplies and hide, just like she did in the QZ. There weren't much good hiding places in Jackson, but surely she could manage to find at least something.

Or maybe they could try-

"She took all of my new fantasy books away!"

Oh.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

The school in Jackson was also very different from what she had been used to.

Nobody was fighting over food during lunch time- mostly because everyone had their lunch prepared and delivered from the dinning room, or their parents had packed them one- but still. Not even one person tried to steal her food, which was weird.

More than weird.

They've had lunches back in the QZ too, but the food there had been entirely different. In Jackson, it almost always was some kind of meat or fish- mostly chicken or any other type of birds, because they were the easiest to take care of- potatoes or bread with vegetables and a piece of fruit, sometimes even something sweet for a dessert.

Where as in the QZ, their lunches had mostly consisted of dried meat of any kind, makeshift hard bread or crackers and sometimes canned vegetables or fruit, but that was only a few times a month if even that.

(Ellie was just really glad that they didn't have to eat rats at that time like she had seen some guys in the QZ cooking and than selling to people. Their food might have been gross and bland but at least it wasn't rats- or at least she had hoped that it wasn't.)

And there weren't daily fights about it like back in the QZ either, nobody was trying to take more than what was his, even tho she saw a few kids traiding a portion of their food, it never seemed forced.

The first few times, that she had gotten her lunch there, she was half expecting someone else to just grab it out of her hands and fight with her for it. But no one did, they didn't even try, she was still very wary about her food tho, gulping it down faster than anyone else, but nobody seemed to be judging her for it, even tho she did notice a few pitying looks here and there, that she didn't feel the need to react to.

But she never ate the meat.

Wasting any kind of food would be more than unimaginable for her just a few months ago, but now she just couldn't force herself to eat it, especially if it was a stew, no matter how hard she tried.

'It was a last resort. You think it doesn't shame me? But what was I supposed to do? Let them starve? These people who put their lives in my hands? Who expect me to keep them safe? Who love me?'

But she wasn't so stupid to tell about it to anyone, wasting anything edible has always been greatly punished in the QZ, she still remembered the one time that she had refused to eat a ration nut bar, because of her alergy to peanuts.

(It wasn't that unusual for people to be allergic to stuff even now, but even that didn't seem to matter that much in the QZ, depending on the guard that was on duty and she had the misfortune to get one that hated her guts that day.)

She had gotten all of her rations, other than water, taken away from her for three days and if it wasn't for Riley, she was pretty sure that that would have killed her already malnourished body at that time.

There was no way in hell that she would risk that happening again, especially because Riley wasn't there to save her ass anymore, by her own fault. How ironic.

At first, she did try to hide it somewhere, dumping it inside of a big flower pot or giving it to the dog, that was almost always roaming around since there was food, but just a week of her trying to get unsuspiciously get rid of it, someone had noticed.

And that someone was Jesse.

"Do you wanna swap with me?" The boy was asking her, suddenly coming almost out of nowhere, while holding up a small plate with a peace of peach fruit pie on it.

"Swap?" Ellie snaps out of it and looks at him, she has been too focused on scanning the room trying find a new hiding spot for the bits of her food that she didn't want- the meat, to notice that he came to her.

Swap was a new word and she didn't know if she liked it yet. Especially not if it had to do with her giving him a portion of her food, or him taking it away from her.

"Yeah you know I give you something you give me something in return. I don't really like sweets and you don't seem to enjoy the meat very much..i don't think the plant is really enjoying it either."

Alright, maybe her meat hiding ritual didn't go as unnoticed as she had originally thought.

"Fine, but just because i feel sorry for you and you really need to build some muscles."

(Jesse had never told her, that she could just ask the cantene lady to make her food vegetarian, he didn't think that it mattered that much, even tho he didn't really enjoy meat either, eating mostly plant based at home. It could be their little secret. And if she had ever asked him about it, he would simply just say that the plant was on its last leg and didn't deserve such suffering- that wasn't a lie either.)

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Ellie knew, that she could never live up to Sarah.

She wasn't as pretty as her, she didn't always have the right words to say and she especially wasn't as smart as her.

She just wasn't enough. She couldn't be enough. Not for him.

Even when he had placed her picture with him right next to Sarah's, it felt like the girl was looking down at her. Because he had never looked at her like he did at his daughter in the photos, not even close. Maybe that was the reason why she had decided to slowly start moving the photo away from Sarah's, hoping that it would go unnoticed and it wouldn't have to be a constant reminder for him that she will never live up to the daughter, that he had lost.

Joel's words were still rooted really deep inside her, digging their tiny thorns into her heart and squeezing tightly around her little heart every time, leaving it to slowly bleed out, everytime that she managed to even borderline dissapoint him, or when she didn't manage to live up to her own standards that she tried to set up for herself.

'Maria told me about Sarah and.

No. Don't say another word.

Im sorry about your daughter Joel, but i've lost people too.

You have no idea what loss is.'

She knew, that he was still deeply hurting because of Sarah's death, but that still didn't make it alright for him to tell her something so ridiculous.

If there was someone who knew everything about loosing people, it was her.

'Everybody i had cared for, had either died or left me.'

Everyone, who had anything to do with her, had died one way or another. Riley got infected because of the stupid need to say goodbye to her- and she had died by her hand-, Tess got infected because of her too- trying to chase a faint dream of finding some form of a cure that wasn't even possible-, and Marlene died... because of her.

Even her own parents hadn't bother to stay around and raise her. Not even her own flesh and blood, the ones who were supposed to be able to love her unconditionally.

Maybe she really was that unlovable.

'Everybody fucking except for you! So don't tell me, that i would be safer with somebody else, because the truth is, I would just be more scared.'

The truth was, that she has been scared her entire life. If not for her own life, than for somebody elses. There wasn't a day that she wasn't worrying about what will happen to her, or her loved ones. And maybe it wasn't noticible, but she was so fucking terrified.

She was so scared of her life in Jackson, scared of loosing her newfound friends again by her fault, like she did with Riley. She was so afraid of screwing up again and watching the people around her die or get hurt because of her.

Because Ellie Williams was a menace, a deadly curse that always managed to destroy everything at least tiny bit worthy around her.

'You're right, you're not my daughter.

And I sure as hell ain't your dad.'

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°

She has never really been a musical type of person. Sure, she did like to listen to some music during her chores or when she had free time, but it was mostly a way for her to get inspired and gain new ideas for her drawings.

Drawing was her thing, she didn't even know when it started, but she was always sketching something on any little pieces of paper or anything really, that she could find in her free time.

(Sometimes even during school, but miraculously enough that never seemed to get her in trouble in Jackson, since she was more than particular about staying on top of her learning at all times, never slacking no matter what.)

The whole process of drawing had always helped her to get her mind together, to stay calm and collected and forget about everything bad that was happening in the world.

It wasn't really about what she was drawing, but more about the reason why she was drawing it. If someone had opened one of her sketchbooks, they could see her whole life sketched out in front of their eyes, everything that had even mattered to her.

She drew Riley, because she wanted to remember her forever as her bestfriend, not as a mindless infected runner that was trying to torn her apart and especially not as the bleeding gun shot wound on her forehead.

She drew Tess, because she deserved to be remembered for her actions and for the hope in humanity, but mostly because she seemed to be an important part of Joel's life.

She drew her friends- Dina, Jesse and Cat, because they were practically like a second family to her by now, even tho they were usually an annoying pain in her ass.

There were also sketches of animals, from horses to dogs to other livestock. Some drawings of buildings, of the infected or even of food and just nature by itself.

But most importantly, she drew Joel. His drawings were always the most detailed ones, even if it was just a silly sketch of him being on the front porch, holding his favorite cup filled with disgusting bean water, that he seemed to love for some reason.

(Coffee wasn't really easy to get, but Ellie could never see the appeal in it. It was disgusting and bitter, maybe drinkable after adding a lot of milk. But Joel loved it, one time he even traded 2 of his favorite hunting knives for a stupid little bag of coffee beans, but he had banned her from ever mentioning it to anyone.)

Music was Joel's, most importantly his guitar. Ellie still didn't know where he had learned how to play it, but he was really good at it, maybe even better than she was in drawing stuff.

Which was why she couldn't make herself refuse, when he had offered to teach her how to play it one evening.

"Alright kiddo, just put ya little fingers there." Joel was trying to show her how to play the first accord of his favorite song, and she was desperately trying to get it right.

The guitar was gently placed on her lap, while he was standing behind her with his hand on hers, guiding her where to put her fingers to play.

She put her fingers in the right position, exactly how he was showing her, and tried gently stroking the strings with her other hand.

"See! You're a real natural. A few more lectures and you will be better than me." Ellie was fighting to keep the red color from coming onto her cheeks, but she didn't seem to have much success.

"Shut it old man. Agh this is horrible. Now its your turn." And just in a moment, she was turning around showing the guitar gently into his hands, before she sat down on the floor in front of him.

"Little brat." Joel was saying with a slight smile on his lips, knowing why she had done it but not daring to say a word about it to embarass her enough, he would save it for a better opportunity.

He sat down on a chair, with the guitar still in his hands, trying to remember all of the words to the song, that he had promised to play to her again, seeing how patient she seemed to be, maybe even a bit excited.

He was never one to play for someone else, but even that had seemed to change when she came around.

With his fingers in the right positions, he slowly started playing the melody, soon adding the words to it, putting the whole song together.

"If i ever were to loose you,

id surely loose myself.

Everything i have found here,

I've not found by myself.

Try and sometimes you will succeed,

to make this man of me.

All my stolen missing parts,

I've no need for anymore.

Cause I believe,

and I believe cause i can see,

our future days.

Days of you and me.

Back when I was feeling broken

I focused on a prayer

You came deep as any ocean

Did something out there hear?

All the complexities and games

No one wins but somehow they still played

All the missing crooked hearts

They may die but in us they live on.

Cause I believe,

and I believe cause i can see,

our future days.

Days of you and me.

When hurricanes and cyclones raged,

When winds turned dirt to dust,

When floods they came, the tides they raised,

Ever closer became us.

And all the promises at sundown,

I meant them like the rest.

All the demons used to come 'round,

I'm grateful now they've left.

So persistent in my ways,

Hey angel, I am here to stay.

No resistance, no alarms,

Please, this is just too good to be gone.

Cause I believe,

and I believe cause i can see,

our future days.

Days of you and me.

You and me,

It's just, you and me."

And with his last words, Ellie truly knew for the first time in her whole life, that she belonges here. Right in that moment, no matter her past or the mistakes that she had done.

There was no place else that she would rather be at that second, than with him there.

She knew, that the future will be harsh and cruel, but nobody could ever take this moment away from her and that was what mattered, because right now, she was his as much as he was hers.

Their souls were forever intertwined together, destined to meet in every universe.

They had truly saved each other, even if they didn't know it yet, they were engraved deeply inside each other's souls.

No mattered what will happen, they were each others missing peace.

Never to be torn apart by death, or any other force.

The two of them were intertwined by thousands of different lifetimes, playing an interchangeable role in every single one.

(Because every single on of us has a little piece of Joel and Ellie hidden deep inside, and through us they live forever, till the end of time itself.)