#i don't want to have to write my own but i will if i have to
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bethanythebogwitch · 2 days ago
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Yeah, DW writers tend to fall into the trap of "my character can't ever kill someone so I'm going to say that any other option, including stuff that is way worse than just dying, is more moral". It's the same problem Superman has where he won't kill, but will stick his enemies in the hell that is the phantom zone.
While there is a lot of inconsistency that comes with characters being written by so many different people, each with their own takes, I think there is some in character reasons why certain Doctors don't kill. For the more optimistic and pacifistic ones like 5 and 8, they often genuinely hope that their enemies can reform (unless they're Daleks) and want to give those enemies the chance to live. For some of the darker Doctors like 6, 7, and 9, they have the issue where they're scared of what they'll become if they jump to killing without it being the absolute last resort. If they accept that killing is an option, how long will it take before they are killing all their enemies, even those who could reform? Interestingly, both of those reasons have been used by DC writers as reasons Batman hasn't killed the Joker yet.
Of course, inconsistent writing is the biggest cause of a lot of these problems. Some writers will have a Doctor kill enemies of they need to, while others insist they won't kill and then need to come up with some other way to dispose of the villains. And sometimes it's out-of-character writing. For example, in Rogue, I think it was out of character for 15 to so quickly jump on the "exile the LARPing bird people to an empty dimension" plan without trying alternatives first, but the writer needed that setup for the tragic end of his boyfriend getting trapped, so they just went with it.
Of course, probably the most famous example of a Doctor trapping his enemies in a hell dimension (or close enough anyway) from The Family of Blood isn't an example of him thinking it's more moral than killing. He was just pushed so far over the edge that he wanted the villains to suffer that bad.
Side note: part of my problem with the War Doctor stories from Big Finish is I don't think he's ruthless enough. War was the Doctor who gave up on his morals and the promise of the name "Doctor" to end the time war at all costs, but the writers aren't willing to treat him as someone who will do whatever it takes. Like if you're going to write War like 8 or 9, just have one of them be the time war Doctor.
My favorite part of doctor who ever is when the doctor does their whole “I refuse to kill this villain/monster because of merciful moral reasons” bit and then immediately follows it with “so instead I will trap them alone in a barren hell dimension for all eternity”. It’s like that’s worse, though. do you get why that’s worse.
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just-a-ghost00 · 3 days ago
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What do they wish they could tell you?
This reading is romantically enclined. If you're wondering about a specific person that you're romantically interested in, whatever your situation may be, this reading is for you. The theme of this reading is Kpop solo artists.
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Group 1
Cards : 4 of wands, Nature, Tibetan black quartz - Light up your spiritual path
I wanted to first adress that as I was pulling the cards for you, I felt a bit of warmth radiate through my stomach, around the solar plexus. And immediately this made me think of longing. I got the feeling that for a lot of you this would be a person that you are in a separation with, someone that is currently far from you whether that is by choice or because of external circumstances. The card of the tibetan black quartz mentioned a question that caught my eye straight away. "Could I be even clearer right now?" And this felt like something they would actually want to tell you. "What more do you want me to do? How far do I have to go to prove you that this is real?" This person feels frustrated and hopeless because they think you are not getting their point. That you do not see eye to eye with them. However, they think they have tried everything in their power to get you to understand the extent of their feelings. This person thinks a lot about you. They turn the situation over and over in their head again, to figure out what they've missed, what they could or should have done differently. The nature card made me feel like life circumstances lead you to go on your separate ways, yet this person is still keeping an eye on you and thinking about you consistantly. They cannot forget you. With so many eyes represented on the card and the presence of wings as well as a moon crescent that is placed like a halo, this makes me think that this person feels spiritually connected to you. The current distance between you allows them to consider your connection from a different angle and understand the truth of it all. Even though they may be missing you dearly, they think it's a blessing in disguise. This person wants to tell you that you are their home. With that 4 of wands, I get a strong message of "I want to come home to you".
"I want us to support each other and walk in the same direction. To face the future together, hand in hand, no matter what's ahead of us. I don't want us to fight and sulk all alone in our corner, when we could be together and ruling the world. I want us to write our own story. One we could fondly talk about to our children someday. One we could look back to with sparkle in our eyes as if it were yesterday. I have deeply thought about you, about us. About the change I wanted to see and the future I envisioned. And today, I know that my future is with you. I know that I want you to be around when I wake up in the morning, when I'm feeling down at the end of the day or excited about my success. I want you to be around when I am taking another step towards my goals or when I'm thinking of going back to where I started. I want us to see each other for who we are. No masks, no pretending. Just us, waltzing in the middle of a room like today could disappear and there would be no tomorrow. I love you. That thought has become as clear as the day. As certain as there is a rainbow after the rain. I want you like I have never wanted anyone before. That scared me, I admit it. But now I know. I know what it means and I am in for it. How can I get that feeling across to you? What do I have to do for you to trust me and let me in? Haven't I done enough already? Haven't have told you how much you meant to me? What was I lacking for you to distrust me and walk away? I want you to see me. Not for the person I used to be, not for what people portray me as, but for the person I am when I'm with you and the one I want to be for you. I wish you could see my efforts and my value. That you shared the same vision of the future as me. I miss you. There isn't a single day that I don't think about you. Everything reminds me of you and that is excruciating. To know that you may not feel the same, that maybe you are already in other arms, other sheets. That maybe you don't think of me like I do. That you have moved on and forgotten everything we've been through. When I look at the sky, I think I see your face looking down on me. When I see a star, I wish it were you shining a light on me. I pray to God for your presence. I ask for you to be safe and sound. I ask for you to love me. In my prayers I talk to you and whisper to the wind the words I wish I could whisper into your ear. Do they get to you? Do you feel my embrace anytime you are caught by the wind? Because I do."
Group 2
Cards : Page of swords, The Wildling, Hiddenite - Claim your happy place
First of all, I want to mention that a lot of air related energy is being represented in this spread and there's an emphasis put on swords because the wildling card also has two swords crossing depicted on it. Which reminds me of the 2 of swords card in certain decks. Right off the bat, I got a very combattive energy from these cards and heard "You are mine". "I'm coming for you." It feels like this person may have been very uncertain in the past about you, what you meant to them and what they hoped for. But they recently gained clarity about that and now they wish to communicate without about what they have found out. I also felt like this person is very protective over you and feeling urged to act. As if something happened that triggered this visceral need of being by your side as soon as possible. For some of you, I'm getting the message that your person may have heard that you were being courted by another person. If that is not the case, something may have given them the impression that such a thing was happening. They want to tell you that people better stay away from you because they intend to "claim" you as theirs. I'm getting a message that this person had a dream in which they were losing you, possibly in a tragic way or a dramatic way. And this person thought to themselves " sh*t I didn't see that coming". They want to tell you that now, they know where they stand when it comes to you. They want to be by your side, fighting with you instead of against you.
"I am done resisting the urge to love you with all I have. In the past, I tried to forget you. To ignore what I felt was so obvious. I was stuck in a loop, struggling between my thoughts of you and my fears. I was fighting against myself and in the process I was fighting you. I hurt you, said and did things that lead you to believe I was cold, that I didn't care when in reality you were all I could see. You were in my mind 24/7. I kept imagining things, wondering how we could be together, trying to establish the possibilities I had, making plans in my mind but I got scared and ran away. I am done running. I don't want to lie to you anymore. I don't want to pretend being this cold hearted s.o.b that only thinks about their own satisfaction. I want to be with you. To prove you that you were not wrong. To show you the true essence of who I am. I want to know more about you. To figure out this thing that's between us, understand why it's there, where it's taking us. I just want to talk to you. To know you're okay. That you're safe and sound, that no one has laid a finger on you. If that ever happened, I would be devastated. I look at your pictures and can"t help but wonder who took it. Was there another person behind the camera that loves you more than I do? I'm tired of acting as if nothing happened, of going to work or going on with my day wearing a mask of indifference when all I can think about is having you in my arms. I wish to tell you I am different than what you perceive of me. That I am worth your time and energy. I want to fight for your love and attention, to be worthy of you. I want to prove the world that we make sense. That we go together well. I want to make a statement that will mark you forever and let everyone know that you are off limits."
Group 3
Cards: 4 of wands, Connect to heart, Pyrite - call on your core power
Before doing your reading, as I shuffled the cards, I challened the song Listen to your heart from Roxette. Looking at the lyrics a little, I got the feeling of someone being afraid of missing an opportunity if they ever chose to walk away. It's like this person wants to say "I don't want to make the wrond decision". "I'm afraid of ruining it all if I don't take this seriously." They wish to tell you that they imagine a future with you. That to them, you are more than just a friend or a random person they may have met a few times. That their feelings are stronger than what you may perceive or imagine. They wish to tell you that they would do anything for you. That they feel attracted to you in ways that sometimes surprise them. That they are loyal to you and that their heart is filled with love whenever they think about you. You hold the key to this person's heart. They feel like you are connected through space and time. And even if you may be apart, this person's gaze is always turned towards you, their heart is always open to you, their thoughts are filled with memories of you. They just cannot go away and close the door, no matter how hard they try. Their feelings for you are stronger than any fear they may have regarding the connection. This person wishes to tell you that they want to be by your side through thick and thin.
" I love you. It's as simple as that. There isn't much to say or to argue about. Because deep in your heart, you know this is the truth. Ever since I met you, I have envisioned a future where we stood together hand in hand. I have wanted to be with you and support you, to hold you in my arms and cherish you for the rest of my life. Upon first sight I knew that this was not just a coincidence. That this meant more than our eyes could see and our minds could grasp. I felt immediately close to you and this incessant need to be close to you. I wanted to love you with all I had. I couldn't help but to adore you and worship you. I was like a dog on a leash and if at first I got scared, with time I didn't mind. Because it felt like this was the right thing to do. I always feel you in the corner of my mind. If I close my eyes, I can see you dancing in the room, trying to please me and seduce me. I can picture your body on the floor and the way it moves so naturally against mine. I can see us walking to the altar hand in hand, a smile on our faces, love radiating through our hearts. I can imagine the house we'd have, the family we'd build. The fairytale kind of love I always wished for. I cannot think of anyone else better than you to fit that role. I wouldn't want anyone else, even if that person was a better match. Because I chose you. And I am not going to go back on that decision. I want to make love to you. But everything has its own time, right? Let us not rush. We have all the time in the world to learn about each other and explore this bond that we share. I am sure you feel it too. This isn't an illusion. It is real. And I want you to embrace it just like I intend to do."
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bonefall · 1 day ago
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"How big should a Clan territory be?"
For the dozens of people who have asked this over the last couple of years!
This question comes in a lot of forms; "How big are the Clan territories?" "How much space does one Clan need?" "How much land should I give my Clans to exist in?" The answer is a bit complicated, and depends on the type of land, what you're going for exactly, the setting, so on.
But, broadly, there's TWO particular factors at play here; How anthropomorphic you're portraying your warriors, and how productive the land is.
Factor 1: The Anthro Scale
I'm starting with this one because it could you the simpler answer. The Erins write Clan cats like humans in cat bodies, with massive social units and communal living. Realistic feral cats don't act like Clan cats. They are only semi-social, due to domestication.
See, a Clan cat will "share" territory between all of its members, and some Clans have canonically hit populations of over 50 individuals. Real feral colonies consist of "overlapping circles" of somewhere between 2 - 15 cats, most of them related females.
This is relevant because, even in densely populated areas with as much food as they can eat, truly feral colonies will have about 2 cats per 5 acres, capping out at about 15 members. Queens will hang out together and raise their kittens communally, but they will hunt and patrol in their own "circle." These boundaries are violently enforced against outside cats, especially if it's too crowded.
(Toms have circles 5x as big as a queen's, overlapping several territories. They're also considerably less social.)
So, if you wanted to incorporate some cat behavior into your Clan's mindset about how big their territory should be, while still being willing to sacrifice a bit of "realism" for groups over 15-ish members, simply take Clan population and multiply it by 2.5 acres.
30 cats = 75 acres. That's a little under 57 football fields, if you're American, or 50 football fields, if you're European.
Extra reading: How realistic cat territories work. Contains the numbers I'm referencing.
It's also very important to know; feral cat density is completely tied to food availability, the big numbers numbers are for cats whose needs are met. Cats are solitary hunters, and when they feel like they have to work for their food, they become VERY territorial. The density of cats in rural areas can be as low as 1 molly per 15 acres, even lower for toms, and they will leave if hunting is not easy.
THIS IS WHY YOU SHOULD NOT FEED FERAL CATS. Please GOD they are SO invasive, please do not give colonies food, they still hunt when they're full so you just end up concentrating a ton of predators in one place. They are not warriors with a law against disrespecting food, they are just kitty cats with silly kitty instincts
I have a suspicion that most of the people who are asking the question aren't really looking for a "realistic cat" answer, though. We LOVE our big cat Clans with their complicated politics around here. You're probably wondering how much land you need to feed your population!
Factor 2: Land Productivity
The exact amount of space is going to vary a lot, because it's more about productivity of the land to sustain a prey population than it is raw size. Remember what we learned back in Warrior Bites: Dietary Needs; a 30-cat Clan will need approximately 3 pounds of meat (10,500 calories) per day, which is about 2 rabbits, or 105 mice.
Here's some visual examples of what I mean. This one (1) acre homestead...
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Has 20 patches of high-value crops, plus an orchard, AND livestock pens. This territory alone could attract enough crows, mice, rats, rabbits, and sparrows to feed all those cats daily. That's not even counting the humans themselves, who may be friendly enough to the colony to toss them kibble occasionally.
(this is why cats domesticated themselves. Even without the free food from the humans, farms are extremely productive hunting grounds.)
Meanwhile, the Edmonton Mall, which is a whopping five (5) acres...
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Would be utterly barren. Best food you're going to get out of this wasteland is the leftovers humans toss out, and maybe the rats and pigeons that scavenge as well. It's 5x the space, and yet, infinitely harder to feed the same amount of cats.
So, the most helpful bit of advice I'm gonna give you is this; DON'T ask yourself "how big should this territory be?" You're starting with the wrong question. Start with a real location, and think about how you'd find 3 pounds of meat a day in that area.
It will be a LOT easier to think about the logistics in those terms, and this will lead you to the waaay more productive (and fun) worldbuilding questions. Such as;
"Where would the good hunting spots be?"
"What kinds of animals would they be eating? What sorts of beasts can threaten them, here?"
"How many of these animals would my 30 cat Clan need to hunt a day to equal about 3 pounds?"
"Where would these animals be getting THEIR food?"
"Is there enough habitat in the area for the prey to breed and nest? If not, is there more land beyond the territory that the prey is coming from?"
"Where would infrastructure like dens, walls, and dirtplaces go? What would these be made of?"
"Are there any neat spots for the cats to casually hang out on?"
"What would make for a super cool arena for my climactic narrative boss fights?"
"Does this area have unique stage hazards that my cats would have to learn to deal with?"
"Which sorts of plants and herbs would they encounter?"
If your Clan is tool-using, like BB!Clans are, then you can ask even more advanced questions. Like, where you'd find kindle for fire, what objects you can use as crafting materials, and what might make for unique trade goods.
Think about other things related to your Clan's biome-- in a tundra or desert, there will be less for prey to eat, so the territory will be large to cope with the low density. If there's a major body of water, they might have a constant supply of aquatic prey from upstream. Hunting grounds might change based on the seasons.
Also remember not to underestimate how fast small animals breed, and how many of them there can be in one area. Even using low estimates, 1 female mouse has 6 pups, 7 x 6 = 42, 42 x 6 = 252, 252 x 6 = 1,452. It takes only 4 months for mouse population growth to get exponentially ridiculous.
Finally, remember that prey can vary. A well run Clan would be able to generally understand when they've been overhunting one particular species, and start shifting gears to lift the "pressure" off that population.
(In my cultural expansions series, this management task is assigned to one of the new roles-- the Head of Hunting.)
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prttyndolllike · 2 days ago
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my tips for f4st!ng <3
1. distract yourself! if you're at home i'll admit this is a little hard, but it IS very helpful :)) clean your room! do your makeup! do your nails! listen to music! make playlists! call your friends! make your bed! organize!
2. try on clothes that are too small for you! this one gets me the most, it's rlly triggering knowing that you aren't there yet (at least for me)
3. look at th!!!nsp000! i prefer looking it up on here or pinterest!
4. make lists of clothing you want to buy at your gw, if you f4st maybe you'll actually be able to fit into them one day
5. sleep!!! this one is the hardest for me lolz :p but you can't feel hungry if you're asleep :)
6. go on a walk! go walk around your neighborhood! or walk up and down your stairs! walk in circles in your room! it burns c4l0r!3s & distracts you :))
7. drink water!!! when you first wake up drink water, when you feel hungry drink water, when you feel tired drink water, when you want to quit drink water
8. stay away from the kitchen! the food in there is gross anyways & you don't need it! if you're not around food you won't want it as much!
9. dye your hair! this is usually very time consuming & will most likely take your mind off food
10. paint your nails! i know i included this earlier but i feel like it includes its own section :)) if your nails are wet you can't really eat food.
11. keep a reminder of your w3!ght! if you have a mirror in your room write your w3!ght on it, constantly remind yourself that's how much you w3!gh.
12. write your w3!ght on your hand! any time you go to grab food you'll see it and remember why you're doing this, how far you've come and how much farther you have to go.
there's def more but this is all i can think of rn! if you have any helpful tips share them in the comments <3
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rimmsel · 2 days ago
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When I first started transitioning in high school back in 2010, I thought the point was to be as stealth as possible and avoid being clocked.
When I wanted to start hormones, I visited the gender identity clinic at the local hospital to interview with a panel of doctors who were specialists in identifying Gender Identity Disorder (the official diagnosis that I needed in order to be able to get a prescription for testosterone.)
When they asked me about my favorite hobbies, school subjects, books, tv shows and movies, games, and sports- I didn't see the connection. I enjoyed drawing, creative writing, fantasy series, cartoons, roleplaying, and swimming. I figured they're the experts, so they must know what to look for in my answers.
When they asked me about my childhood and the types of toys I owned (dolls and makeup sets, or toy cars and baseball sets?) and the kinds of games I played (tea parties with stuffed animals or running games like tag?), I figured they're the experts, so they must have some proof that as a child, I should have still gravitated towards the 'boy' choices. I thought I better not tell them the truth, which was that I enjoyed those things equally.
When they warned me that visibly trans individuals faced higher levels of bullying and harassment and asked if I was prepared to face that possibility if I transitioned, I figured they were just concerned about my safety. I thought that as long as I didn't draw attention to myself at school, my transition would go unnoticed by bullies and I'd stay off their radar.
When when they asked towards the end of the 1-2 hour interview if I wish I'd been born male instead of female, I told them of course- then I wouldn't have had to go through this whole process just to live as myself. And when they asked if I identified more as transgender or as male, I told them, "male. I don't want anyone to know I'm trans."
I stopped painting my nails after that. I took out my earrings and let the holes start to close up. I avoided dyeing my hair for the rest of high school, even though I'd always wanted to try it. I tried to modulate my affect to be more flat. I tried to make my 's' sounds less whistle-y. I hid my binder bump under even more hoodies. I didn't let myself develop an interest in my sense of style or looks. I started trying to work out to get more muscular. I hid away any 'feminine' parts of myself that would prevent me from passing as 100% cis, and avoided talking about that girl from my past.
It's no wonder I stayed depressed for so long after that.
crazy how people assume trans guys dont know if we had short naturally coloured hair and a basic style we'd "pass better." "you want tips on how to pass? no more fun piercings, jewelry, anything feminine, dyed hair, nail polish or nice things for you!" thanks but I choose joy and whimsy x
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felassan · 9 hours ago
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David Gaider on Flemeth, under a cut for length:
"I have a type. I admit it. There are certain wells I can return to repeatedly and always find something new to explore. One of them is older female characters. Mike used to rib me about it. Consider Wynne. Meredith. Genevieve. And, of course, the biggie: Flemeth. Why are they a type? I... don't know, honestly. I guess I have a feeling that older men fade, they strive to regain their youth or establish a legacy and we've seen that story a thousand times, but older women? They become free to become something new. I guess I see so many possibilities in that. I had a conception of who Flemeth was, and why, right from the very start. Her creation went hand in hand with Morrigan, as a being whose thirst for retribution hundreds of years ago attracted an entity (slight confession: I didn't know Mythal specifically, at the time, "an elven god" was enough). I also knew where Morrigan was right and very wrong about her. Misconceptions of the truth are built into DA's foundation, and they were fundamental to this mother-daughter relationship I was building. Like many seeds I'd put in the world, however, I had no idea whether I'd ever get to explore it. Knowing that she was a character of possible future importance, if not a major player in DAO, I wasn't much surprised when she was one of the first cuts the art team made in terms of getting a unique appearance. Thus the "batty old woman" players met in DAO. Not as hard a cut as the Qunari, though."
"Going into DA2, I wanted both Morrigan and Flemeth, but we could only have one. So I picked Flemeth. This was the game where she really got to come into her own. I remember the art team coming and asking if it was OK if she got a new model, as it'd be a retcon of sorts. I didn't care. I wanted it. I honestly don't remember whether Kate Mulgrew was cast before or after Claudia. After, I think? All I recall is that Cab came into my office one day and asked if Kate might be a good fit. Asked me, the dyed-in-the-wool Trekkie who had stuck with Voyager even through the admittedly lean years? The squeal I made was un-manly. Cab took that as a "yes". 😅 I didn't get to talk to Kate until DA2, however. Schedules being what they were, we had a tight window to record Flemeth... so I had to write all her scenes before almost anything else in DA2 was written, before I even had a team! Ack! It was OK, though, for the most part. I knew where I wanted to take her, and a big part of it was going to explain her transition - to set her up for the future. So I whipped up a script in, like, two days and off we went. Kate was a marvel in the booth. She adored Flemeth and you could really tell. I didn't get to meet Kate in person, however, until DAI. This came pretty late in its development, compared to when we recorded her for DA2, and we flew down to Virginia (to accommodate her schedule - she was writing her memoir at the time, I think) for a single session. It was going to be *tight*."
"I was a mess. I was finally going to meet Captain Janeway... and yes yes, I know she's also more than that. But come ON. When we sat down, I figured I'd have to talk her through the character all over again. It'd been years since that one session at the start of DA2, right? And even more since DAO. But, no. Kate remembered Flemeth perfectly. I remember sitting there as she told me how much she loved the character, how rare it was to get one with so much texture and possibility. She called out my writing - my writing! - and waxed poetic about how she viewed Flemeth's arc. I... I was floored. 🫠 Then we began recording. One issue that quickly reared its head was how Caroline had to speed through the lines if we hoped to finish. Kate was a trooper, and most takes she'd get it in one (which is rare), but I was alarmed because we weren't giving Kate time to read the VO comments on each line. I brought it up, as there were some lines (so much sarcasm) that required nuance - Kate was getting them, oddly, but I was worried. "Oh, it's fine," Kate said. "I read the comments as we go." "How could you? We're going so fast!" "I'm a speed reader." Oh. OK, then. That certainly explained it. 😁 We got to the confrontation scene with Morrigan and she nailed it. Over and over. More than once, Caroline would make a call and, before I could even interject and say "no, Kate had it right, actually" Kate would explain exactly why she did it that way and why it worked for Flemeth. I was in love. She did the "I will see her avenged!" section all in one go. I got chills. Then we got to the final scene. You know the one. With Solas. It was this beautiful moment. She took it somewhere quiet and sad... and when she got to that last line, we all felt it: Flemeth was dead. Everyone was in tears. I suppose I could talk more about the process. How she started off aligned with Morrigan's original Delirium inspiration, but I didn't pull back her loopy way of talking as much (bet you wondered). I still don't know why it was so easy to slip into her voice, but I'm grateful I got the chance. ❤️"
[source thread]
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moonstruckme · 2 days ago
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hi, just wanted to mention that i love ur fics—they’re all vv sweet and creative <3
for the snow angels could you write a ice-skater!reader x ice-skater marauder (either sirius or even poly!wolfstar)
also if you’re open to doing it, could you write it so the reader is deaf (and uses sign language? if not that’s perfectly fine ♥️♥️)
Hi sweetheart, thank you so much! That's really kind of you <3
cw: I don't have a ton of experience with the deaf community so if anything in here is inaccurate or offensive please feel free to let me know and I'll try to change it
figure skater!Sirius x hearing impaired!figure skater!reader ♡ 464 words
You come out of your spin, and your eyes seek Sirius immediately. It’s a habit, an instinct, and lately almost a magnetic pull. You find him watching you from across the rink with a fond uptilt to his lips. There’s a look on his face that lets you know what he’s going to do even before he signs, “Hold on.” 
You huff a laugh to yourself but do as he says. Sirius does this more and more often lately—fretting over your cold hands, wanting to warm them in his own. It’s like he forgets you’ve been skating without gloves your whole life, or somehow forgets that his hands are just as cold, since he goes without them too to sign at you. 
“Aren’t you freezing?” he signs, mouth forming the words as he does, just before he gets to you. He rubs his hands together, taking yours between them. He blows a loose strand of hair away from his face. It floats right back. 
You know it’s only a matter of time until Sirius tries to coax you back off the ice for a hot chocolate. “Come on, sweetheart, my treat,” he always says, as if you’re going along for the free watery hot chocolate and not just to spend time with him. Lately, something has shifted in the dynamic between you and Sirius. He spends maybe half his time at the rink actually skating, the other half signing to you from across the rink and warming your hands. And you spend most of your time thinking about him. 
You pull your hands from his. “Did you see my layback?” you ask, mouth pulling sideways into a grimace. 
Sirius mirrors your expression, though you can see his smile peeking through. “I saw. You’ll get it, you just need to get your back leg in the right place.” 
You push out a sigh. You’ve been trying to do that all morning. “Help me with it?” 
“Now?” Sirius’ nose wrinkles. “I was thinking we could break for hot chocolate.” 
You suppress a smile. Predictable. 
“Come on,” he signs at your reluctance. “You’ve got to be freezing. My treat.” 
You laugh. “Help me for a little while, please? Then we can go.” 
Sirius rolls his eyes at you, but his expression is fond. “Fine. Let me warm you up first, though.” 
He takes your hands again, cupping his around them and raising them to his mouth to blow hot hair into your palms. You smile and let him. The warmth is nearly as nice as the feeling of Sirius’ hands cradling your own, of his lips brushing the sides of your thumbs. You wonder, sometimes, if this is really only an excuse to touch you. 
You’ll have to ask him when your hands aren’t so pleasantly occupied.
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georgettekaplan · 12 hours ago
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Ooh, Ooh, I know this one! At least when it comes to books.
Now if you don't know me, I'm an author. I've written both action-adventure stories
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and the more expected romance stuff. You know, office romance, age gaps, fake dating, that kinda stuff.
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And I get the royalties every quarter.
The romance books do very well. It's been a few years, but I can still count on pretty good sales there.
The adventure books... they're alright. The word 'unspectacular' springs to mind. They're just not making love story numbers.
I don't want to get in trouble by sharing something that was said in confidence, but let's just say if I wanted to do a third Scissor Link book, it would probably be all systems go. If I wanted to do a fourth Easy Nevada... not so much.
Is it just that Scissor Link was written really well and Easy Nevada was an off-day for me? I don't know, maybe. I can tell you that Easy Nevada has gotten a response that, to me, says it is doing what it set out to do. If you like adventure stories, it'll do the job.
So I think the issue is just that, in the lesbian ecosystem, there are a lot more people who read romance novels than read adventures. They vote with their wallets and the votes are counted.
I'm not bitter. It's an insane privilege to be paid to write anything for a living. But I'll tell you, I pitched a lesbian superhero book--I figured Supergirl is a popular show, Supercorp is a popular ship, if we get ten percent of those fans to give this book a shot... nothing doing. And so that's that. You grow what you sow.
It's understandable that you want the lesbian heist movie or the lesbian space opera or the lesbian revenge thriller. That's what made me say "hmm, what if I just write my own story instead of waiting for the Tomb Raider series to be good again?"
But you have to show up on the ground floor. Take a chance on the lesbian zombie book. Show there's a market for stuff that's not the same old comfort food. Because right now, the publishers that take a risk are not being rewarded.
LESS movies about the lgbtq experience MORE movies about people who just happen to be lgbtq. is it really that hard to understand
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chaos-in-deepspace · 2 days ago
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LADS Zayne: A Few More Minutes | SFW
I'd like to apologize if this isn't my best work. I debated not posting this because when I initially tried writing it, I was at work and I was overstimulated, so I don't know if it makes perfect sense. I tried tho, I really did.
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Pairings: Zayne x Reader Warnings: Angst with Comfort, Nightmares Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+.
Blog Information | Masterlist
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Zayne
It had confused you at first, his hesitance at the start of your relationship. Before you two even began dating, he had been on edge with the thought of you sleeping under the same roof as him. It wasn’t until you had come into his office that one day that you found out why.
The nightmares.
He had been sleeping in his office, probably exhausted from work. It was a fitful sleep, and by the time you got over to him, he was in a full blown panic. You had woken him up, let him hold onto you, let him breathe and calm down.
Zayne initially never wanted you to see that, never wanted you to have to wake up in the middle of the night to his whimpers as the nightmares plagued his dreams almost every night. That was until you had insisted on staying the night with him, telling him it was okay.
He had woken up, as per usual, tears staining his cheeks and his heart hammering in his chest. It was different this time, though. He could feel your hand running through his hair, the scent of your shampoo pressed against his nose, and your soft voice whispering that he was alright.
His arms had instinctively wrapped tighter around you, not daring to let you go. You were the only thing grounding him as he buried his face into the crook of your neck.
You had never seen Zayne truly cry, the time when you saw his episode in his office he had managed to hold back. This time, however, in the comfort of his own bed in the middle of the night, with you wrapped up around him, he couldn’t help it.
He didn’t make much noise, but you could feel the wetness of his tears as it ran down your neck. Your hand never stopped playing with his locks, doing your best to comfort him. However long he’d need, you’d be happy to stay there for him.
You weren’t even sure how long you two had laid there with him in your arms, but you do recall how his body had slumped as he managed to calm down enough to fall back asleep, never uttering a word about what happened. Your eyes had grown heavy after that, seeing him now peaceful in your arms.
Then you woke up to the sound of birds outside, your alarm ringing on the bedside table as you groaned. Zayne was still in the same position he had fallen asleep in, slowly rousing from his own sleep.
“Zayne…?” You murmured, checking the time. You were used to him being the first one awake to get ready for work, but in your sleep addled brain you recalled he had the day off.
Zayne groaned against you; despite what everyone seemed to think, Zayne wasn’t a robot. He didn’t like mornings, especially early ones. He knew the importance of making the most of his day though, and making it to work on time, so he’d wake up before the sun even came out normally. So seeing him groggy like this was a treat, the stubborn side of him winning out as he didn’t want to start the day.
“Zayne, come on.” You murmured, “I gotta get ready for work.” As much as you didn’t want to work, you understood it was a necessary evil to pay your bills.
“No,” the word slipped out of Zayne’s mouth before he could even register it, his arms wrapping tighter around you, “Stay here.”
You felt like your heart was melting as you brushed his bangs out of his face, catching a glimpse of tired hazel eyes staring at you, “Are you suggesting I play hooky today?” You teased; the ever responsible Zayne was trying to convince you to call out of work.
“I can write you a doctor’s note…” he murmured, his head nuzzling into you, “Just gimme a few more minutes.”
“Are you sure it’ll only be a few?” You asked, knowing he was falling back asleep already. His nightmares always tended to leave him more exhausted when he woke up.
“Mhn…” he couldn’t even bother with a response as he closed his eyes.
“Fine, I’ll text Captain Jenna and tell her I caught a cold.” You said leaning over to grab your phone, but his grip on you tightened again, “Zayne, I need to at least tell her something.”
“Just a few more minutes.” He tried again.
“You got five minutes before I roll over to text her, then I swear we can relax for the rest of the morning in bed.” You settled on, your arm going to curl around him.
In the end, it was more than a few minutes as you both drifted off to sleep.
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sunsburns · 2 days ago
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just saw your recent post!
can you write yandere dick grayson? (can be a drabble, heacanon, fic or anything i will eat it up because your writing is mwah) it's okay if you don't want to write it, just wanna say this in case you do :)) thanks for taking the time to read this!?
oh my god. (18+, voyeurism)
yandere!dick grayson has a terrible dread knawing in the pits of his stomach whenever he sees you. it comes from his gut, twisting and turning everything in its wake as it slowly crawls up, up and up into his throat, having it close up the second you look his way.
you send him soft smiles and shy waves. he crumbles into dust every single time.
but you're friends. good friends who met through a mutual friend at a bar. friends who get along well, who get brunch together once a week if life doesn't get in the way.
he's your friend and he looks out for you, keeps tabs on you, and remembers the stories you tell him, all the little details. (the chipped nail polish on your left thumb as you wave your hand around while the two of you were grabbing drinks one night. the slight twitch of your lip when you briefly mention how the guy who used to bother you at work suddenly leaves you alone.) dick likes to remember those things about you.
he likes to walk you home, to hug you before you turn around. he likes the way your body presses against his, how your arms wrap themselves around his shoulders and next, his own holding your waist closely. he thinks you fit against him perfectly.
dick only wants to make sure you get home safely, because who knows what could happen in the streets of gotham if a pretty thing like you walks alone in the dark?
there can be creeps lurking, eyeing you, following you. watching, waiting for that split second you turn around—your dress fluttering in the late breeze, the peek of your ass before you push the skirt down and hurry up the steps to your apartment building, waving at dick before stepping inside.
yeah, it would be terrible.
dick never would have considered himself a pervert, he would never call himself that. oh, but that dread that claws at him whenever you're around has him doubting himself sometimes. because how can he excuse his lingering eyes? how can he excuse the bruises on his knuckles after he beats a guy because you mentioned, barely, how he gave you a bad feeling.
well...
maybe he can brush it off because the next day you're huffing over his wounds, touching him, cleaning the crusted blood off of them, kissing the bruise.
maybe he can brush it off as taking care of you. watching you through your wide-open blinds, he can see you sleeping during those late nights on patrol. he just wants to make sure you're okay.
he just wants to make sure that there's no one hiding in the shadows of your bedroom whenever you step out of the shower, skin still wet when you toss the towel aside.
dick thought you were gorgeous. and you are. of course, other people were going to stare, but during the night, late into the after-hours, when you're alone in your bed, he makes sure that no one else can see you.
that no one else can hear the quiet sighs and moans you make when you touch yourself, how flustered you get, how your skin glows in the faint moonlight of gotham while you quiver under the sheets, lips parted and shaking, brows furrowed deeply.
dick makes mental notes of everything you do, every little detail marked to memory.
and yeah, he feels guilty. this clearly isn't how friends work, and there's probably someone getting mugged down the street that he should be helping, but staying by your window seems like a better way to spend the night.
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hi! I was wondering if you could do an Agatha harkness x reader comfort fic for self harm? it's totally okay if not!! 🫶🫶
Hiya!! I wouldn't mind at all! As someone who used to struggle with SH, it was kind of nice to write a hurt/comfort for it. If you guys need someone to talk to, my dms are open :')
I have been very slow with this because of tech week, performances for a play, and then getting sick, sorry!! I'm getting to all my requests I promise yall. This one was a bit shorter than I intended but I still enjoyed writing it
°Agatha with a s/o who sh's°
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Warnings/notes: mentions and descriptions of self harm, blood, angst, hurt/comfort, soft Agatha for the win
She couldn't believe what she was seeing. You, there on the floor of the bathroom, were mid-way cutting your wrist with a knife as you stared at her with wide eyes. Your arm was covered in dripping blood as it started pooling on the floor. Tears spilled out of your eyes as she kneeled down beside you on the rough, tiled floor.
Her hand gently placed itself over yours that held the knife, and she softly pried it from your blood soaked fingers. You let her do so, as you know you couldn't fight her.
The knife was placed in the sink, and she took your injured arm in both her hands, not seeming to care about being covered in your blood.
"Agatha-"
"Why...? Why would you..." She cuts you off.
She is at a loss for words as she chokes on a sob, tears of her own spilling down her face. Guilt hits you like a freight train, and you hang your head in shame, and you try to take your arm away from her but she doesn't relent. She grabs your hips and uses them to pull you into her lap so she can have an easier time cleaning up your wounds.
The next ten or so minutes as she cleaned the cuts was full of winces and gasps of pain as wet paper towels and peroxide dragged and seeped into your cuts; it felt like acid was burning at you when the peroxide was used to clean any dirt. As soon as she was done cleaning your cuts, she made sure to press gentle kisses to every single one of them, like a dog would to its own wounds. She wraps your arm in moisturizing medicine and gauze to prevent it from opening or drying out overnight.
As you attempt to get up, she doesn't let you, but instead she picks you up and brings you to the bed you two share. She places you in a sitting position, and you can't meet her gaze the whole time. Noticing this, her voice breaks you out of your thoughts.
"Doll, look at me, please?"
She tilts your chin up, and she sees the redness of your face and the glassy look of your eyes that mirrored her own. All that is in your gaze is guilt and pain, and her heart aches at the sight. You try your best to avoid her gaze, but it's impossible with how close she is holding your face to hers. A thumb gently rubs your cheek, and instinctively you lean into her hand with fresh tears flowing out of your eyes. The same thumb wipes some of them away with tenderness.
"You don't have to talk if you don't want to, but know I'm not going anywhere. Okay?"
You nod at her words, and you take a deep breath before speaking to ground yourself.
"Its just... shit has been so stressful lately with my job making me stay later and raising my workload, all the deadlines, and then seeing someone from years ago who I had a falling out with today didn't help."
She looked you in the eye the whole time you were speaking, tentatively listening.
"I haven't cut in so long, but I relapsed just like that" you say with a snap of your fingers.
"How could I let myself slip". You weep for your relapse.
Her mouth opens as if she was going to say something, but no words come out. Not like they could as you spoke again before she could get the chance.
"I'd understand if you want to leave or anything. I won't judge or blame you."
~~~~~~
...what?
Her expression changed from that of a gentle one, to very confused as her nose scrunched up. Before you could get on a rambling train, she pulls your face to hers for a gentle kiss. It didn't last long before she pulled away and made you look her in the eye.
"Now why would I do that? You think I would really leave you, especially in a time where you need me?"
She continues holding your face in her hands, rubbing your cheekbones with her thumbs in a gentle caress.
Your gently pushed down on your back, and she lays on her side, facing you. A hand places itself on your bandaged arm and lightly strokes the length of it.
"I'm here for the long haul, no matter what happens. Im going to be here for you in your highs and your lows, darling. I won't leave because of you... harming yourself like this."
Your heart swells at her words, and you can't help the guilt train that hits you in the face, because she's staying with you even with your flaws. Agatha seems to have noticed the shift in your already guilty expression, as she cups the underside of your jaw, forcing you to look at her.
"Dont let anything eat away at you. Everyone had their was of... destressing, I guess you can put it. It isn't a way I endorse, but I can help you find a better way. That's why I'm here."
She looks at you with glassy eyes, brushing some hair out of your face tenderly. Your gaze flicks down to her lips and back up. She does the same and smiles, catching your gaze again as her lips find their way to yours. Her usual rough nature is pushed aside in this moment, a soft side reserved only for you as she tries to ease your pain.
"Let me be your shoulder to cry on. Don't do this when you have a bad day, come to me. I feel like such an awful girlfriend for not even noticing how you were feeling. I've been so wrapped up in mentoring Billy lately that I haven't even spared any of my time for you..."
She traces her fingers along the underside of your jaw as she talks. You grab her hand and you trail kisses from her finger tips up her arm before speaking again.
"Don't feel awful. I know how much he needs your help. The boy is just finding out who and what he is, so I understand. I'm just used to hiding my feelings and masking them, so that's likely why you didn't pick up on anything initially."
You look eachother in the eyes before embracing again, occasional sniffles and sobs escape you two before you separate and Agatha gently pushes you to lay down on the bed.
"Let's get some sleep, bunny. It's been an emotional night for us, so let's rest."
All you can manage is a nod as sleep starts to creep up on you like a fox. Agatha slips into the bed beside you and pulls you close so she is spooning you. The last thing you hear before you fall into slumber is a soft 'goodnight' from behind you, and then a tender kiss on your head.
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zacolyn · 2 days ago
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This is why I have so many WIP's, and why I seem to 'fandom hop'; whenever I get into a new fandom and I have a story idea, I write it out and see if I get any bites. My latest fanfic got so many I was updating it every two weeks up to the last chapter (which is no one's fault but my own. The muses have unionized against me)
But thing is; this is rare. Usually I will get kudos (which are the equivalent of participation prizes to me; worthless) but no comments. Or if I do get comments, there is only like one or two people who show up and then vanish as the fic proceeds.
I am writing for participation. Do these people think published authors exist in a void? Because they don't; they have family and friends motivating them. Fanfic authors may have that too, but we also have the supposed benefit of a fandom to participate in and when the fandom won't participate in return, it causes the author to not want to write.
The case above where their fic was wildly popular but for some godsdamned reason no one felt the need to tell the author how they felt is just incredibly insulting. I'd be demotivated too. What is this author to you that you lavish praise about them but can't be arsed to share a single compliment to them? The incredible audacity absolutely staggers me.
I got a comment on my latest fic that was literally just emojis and even that has more worth to me than 20 kudos. There is literally no excuse. If you don't comment, you stand to lose something you enjoy.
A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.
My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.
My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.
This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.
Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.
I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.
So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.
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soldearestsoulmate · 1 day ago
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Inspired by the Bad End of the game.
Something small. Angst time. (and venting I guess. depression rocks lol)
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The sound of the clock ticking that hung on the wall always sounded loudest in these moments.
He hated it, but Sol endured it. Since he had no choice after all.
He silently waited in his seat for the woman sitting across from him to finish looking through his book...His book full of drawings, sketches, of what he made this week.
She hummed lowly, closely looking at one of the drawings. "I see you drew them again...Quite the memory you have to have picked up all their details, Mr. Brugmansia."
Sol didn't respond to that...He was used to hearing this by now. How many times has these sessions happened? He lost count...
"The rest however...You still can't let that day go, I see...The more you cling to that day. The less likelihood we can make progress on your healing to be released, you know?"
Now Sol let out a low chuckle, it sounded forced, and exhausted.
"You know I'm never getting out of here, doctor..." He spoke with a look that said it all...He was tired, drained...but not because of these sessions, these repeated days.
No...He was tired of living these days without them...
Without you...
"...Then I guess there's no point in this session then. I can skip straight to filling out the paper work for your medica--"
"NO! Please...Just...Can you not do it...This once? Please? I...I rarely can feel not numb anymore since coming here. It's...You don't understand how horrible it feels...To feel like a zombie...A stranger in your own body...It's like..."
"I completely understand, Mr. Brugmansia. That only means the medication is working. It's for your own good. You don't want a repeat of what happened last time, after all...Right?"
Sol looked down at his lap, his hands clenched into fists as he remembered. It wasn't his fault those bastards said that stuff about you. They deserved it...Deserved having their heads bashed in...and put into comas. It was all for you.
The woman opened his sketchbook again, and flipped through a few pages until stopping on one.
"May I ask why you drew him in color this time?" She showed the page...Which had Crowe in it...Usually he'll be colored in black and white or in red...for blood.
"...I had my reasons..."
"Speak then."
"You wouldn't understand."
"Try me." She leaned back in her seat, getting her pen and clipboard ready, prepared to write and take down notes.
Sol sighed and then spoke. "...The night the medication wore off earlier than usual...I had a dream again...A vivid one...I saw them again, but they were...They looked and felt so real. I didn't want to wake up...Not be away from them again..." He smiled at the memory, then paused, his smile fading. "Though they asked me of something. I hated it...I hated the request, but for them...I did it. It was for them..."
"Mhm...By "them", you mean Y/n correct?" Sol nodded lightly. Hearing their name spoken made his heart ache.
"...They said they love the way I bring color and life through my art...That's why I draw them a lot...To--"
"To bring them back to life." She felt pity for the man before him, but not enough. Especially after knowing what he done.
"They wanted to see...Ichabod...with life again...Even after I took it, they asked of me to bring it back, bring him back." He gave a smile, desperation in his eyes as he looked at her. "THAT HAS TO MEAN SOMETHING, RIGHT?! THAT MEANS THEY STILL LOVE ME AND TRUST ME! THEY'RE WATCHING ME! WAITING FOR ME! MY PUMPKIN! MY SOULMATE LOVES ME! EVEN AFTER WHAT HAPPENED, THEY UNDERSTOOD, AND KNEW I DID IT FOR THEM! FOR US!! THEY LOVE ME!!"
It'll be a lie to say she wasn't startled by his outburst, especially with the crazed look in his eyes, but worked to remain calm in her seat. Until he looked to calm himself with a lovestruck smile over his own delusion of what he thought that dream meant. Over believing you actually spoke to him...and met him again.
"...Of course you did, Solivan...Of course." She wrote down a few more things, then clicked her pen shut. "Our session is over now. Please, do eat your food tonight, Mr. Brugmansia. As well, get plenty of rest."
After Sol left the room, with cuffed hands and escorted out by some men, like always. Luckily with no fight this time like the other times.
The woman sighed and rubbed her eyes in frustration. "He's not showing signs of improvement...His delusions truly have a tight hold on him...A change of medication might be best...or a higher dosage..."
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userautumn · 6 hours ago
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i thought you would be happy with buck getting his oh moment and realizing his feelings for eddie but i guess you really were sucked into the bucktommy fanon created huh. Shame that you won't be able to enjoy canon buddie when it happens.
This is the only message I am going to answer about this specifically since I initially brought the topic up on my blog.
So, first of all, by definition, BuckTommy isn't fanon. Fanon is a ship or character that is completely generated by fandom. Buddie, for example, is fanon. Although they share a strong platonic bond, their relationship is not textually romantic. They do not kiss. They are not textually established romantic partners. Eddie said in the last episode that he is straight. So Buddie only exists within a fandom context. Conversely, BuckTommy is established as canon. Buck has touched mouths with that man on-screen. They were established as boyfriends and, now, ex-boyfriends. So it is, quite literally, impossible for BuckTommy to be fanon, even if fans do extrapolate, embellish, or reconstruct that relationship for their own pleasure. So, that's number one.
Number Two: According to this fandom, Buck and Eddie have had their oh moments a combined total of six times now at least (3x15, 3x03, 4x13, and 5x11, to name a few) and absolutely nothing concrete has come out of these events. The shooting is the closest we ever got, and that was four seasons ago. I don't begrudge anyone for reading that moment at the end of tonight's episode within a romantic Buddie context. Go absolutely nuts and have fun with it. But to me, that moment, such as it was, was more of the same - Buck or Eddie look at each other a certain way, or have evident (non-romantic) feelings related to the other, fandom loses their minds, they speculate, convince themselves they're right, nothing happens, rinse and repeat. I'm personally tired of the spin cycle.
I said I wanted strides toward Buddie canon to be made crystal clear and that's still true. You clearly see things differently (and that's alright), but outside the Buddie fanfiction hivemind, tonight's episode was not crystal clear. There was no discussion of Buck's feelings. He didn't vent them to Maddie or Bobby or Eddie himself. He didn't say, out loud, or indicate in any explicitly romantic way that he has feelings for Eddie. Buck having feelings about Eddie leaving is not the same as having feelings for him. They are best friends. They are family, actually. If Eddie leaves, Buck is losing the anchor to his support system and his (pseudo-)son. That's a big deal. That is an extraordinary weight to carry, especially on the heels of a significant breakup, and especially while dealing with abandonment issues. There was nothing romantic about that and, reducing that moment to a romantic reading, seems... odd. To me.
I'd like to think I'd still be able to enjoy Canon Buddie if it happens tbh. I actively write fic about those two in my spare time even though I keep my conversations about them to the DMs. But if I'm not able to enjoy it, it won't be because of the ship itself, it will be because I finally tired of the abject cruelty that's cropped up in this space. There's this unspoken rule in fandom that what happens during hiatus stays in hiatus, and we all just silently agree to move on from it when the show comes back. But I'm having a hard time with that this year because I've seen and experienced some absolutely insane things from this fandom the last few months that have stuck with me. So. Maybe I won't still enjoy it, but I hope I will.
I was really angry with the (non-Buddie related) content of this episode when you messaged me, so you probably thought or hoped I would bitch and curse you out, and we'd do this whole back and forth thing that would inevitably lead to you getting blocked. But I meant what I said - I have no interest in arguing with anyone about this show. We're not going to agree, and that's okay. I'm not your inspirational Buddie Warrior, and that's also okay. I have too much to deal with than to actively engage in internet beef. What is is what is, whether you or I or both or neither of us like it, and arguing about it isn't going to change it. So we might as will just learn to live with it and each other as best as we can.
I'm going to go watch TV now.
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the-main-daine · 2 days ago
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Life Series Character Renders:
Featuring Martyn, Mumbo and Pearl
(I actually have quite a lot to say about two of these this time.)
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Martyn:
Human.... ish. Hear me out on this one:
So Martyn has this fascinating background lore to the Life Series called Watcher/Eyes and Ears Lore. I'm quietly obsessed with this.
I love watching his lore streams after every series, and have come up with a few theories on my own: His thumbnails are always fully illustrated, so his character has a canon 'look' for every season, which I think is just, deeply cool.
But in his lore, there's also this space between SMPs, where the Watchers kind of... hold people until they can be used again. And since Martyn is the protagonist of the very cool story he's writing, I got it in my head that in this space between, Martyn isn't QUITE human. Maybe he was at one point.
Maybe he never was, I don't know.
But alongside all the cracks and stuff that have started to show up on his body; there's seams along the joints, and light shining within, as he starts to become more befitting as a vessel.
A vessel for what? No idea. I probably won't be drawing all those seams in any fanart comics of the series themselves - I imagine they get covered up when he's sent out into the world to interact with others in various SMPs - but I thought the idea was too cool not to draw at least once.
As a past winner, he gets his crown, and the burning eye of Mars by his name.
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Mumbo:
Vampire Mumbo!
I know he doesn't have the grey streak in his life series skin but I love it too much I'm keeping it forever.
It makes him look so much more threatening and serious than he is.
Poor Mumbo. I was really rooting for you buddy. Better luck next series!
At least he still does damage with those End Crystals.
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Pearl:
A lunar moth
As a winner, she gets her crown, and she gets her moon.
I'm not going to lie I want that lunar moth hoodie more than anything.
I had a lot of fun with Pearl: Her skin design is so simple (Well, maybe not this season, but usually) that it leaves so much room to interpret it. She's always going around with dogs, making her wolfish would've been really easy, but I think Moth suits her more.
There's a lot of mythology with moths being a little off kilter, mad, or leading people to madness that I think fits with Pearl's tendency to be a little bit of a loose canon, wild and unpredictable. Like a moth's flight patterns.
Red Hood Pearl had to put in an appearance here, especially with how it's sort of creeping to overtake her in Wild Life this season, and she just gets so earnestly threatening when she's on a red life despite still being all smiles and all laughs.
Unlike Gem or Cleo, I think there's an edge to Pearlie Pop on red that just reminds me of a horror monster, in the best, best, best way.
I haven't figured out heights but she's also the tallest.
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kiss4noo · 3 days ago
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𝓓ating 𝓡oulette ! . ˚ ౨ৎ ⊹ 
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꒰ 🎀 ꒱ 𝒩ishimura ℛiki [니키] : ​​𝒞h 3. – first date! kinda nervy 😍
𝓰enre. smau (social media au), comedy, fluff, angst, romance, best friends to lovers. .˚⊹ 𝓹airing. non-idol,,best friend riki x fem reader. ໒꒱ 𝔀arning(s). profanity, kys/kms jokes, poor attempt at humor. <//3
𝓼ynopsis .ᐟ you have horrendous luck with men… and your best friend knows this. so, when you ask him to set you up with a guy, he immediately agrees– except, he secretly likes you. in attempts to do what you’ve asked of him, he sets you up with his friends, sabotaging every date you go on: until you finally agree to go out with him.
𝓼tatus. ongoing! 𝓊pdates. every 2 to 3 days. (attempting) 𝓼tart. 11.04.24
꒰ 💌 ꒱ 𝓉aglist. open! comment / send an ask to be added!
@nshmuras @wonsdoll @pshbites @greentulip @roarr-ki @chiaki-nanami-aesthetic @sol3chu @rikidaze @lelestarmy @17ericas @who-tf-soddhi @yangjungwonnie (bold cannot be tagged)
꒰ 💬 ꒱ 𝓶i 𝓷ote. so liek. i be making my own rules and my schedule is not working for this upload goal... hahaha. ANYWAY, this chap was so awk to write LMAOO. hope u cringe like i did.
if you enjoyed this fic, please like and reblog! it's always appreciated :)
enjoy, my lovely readers. xoxo, mi. ‹𝟹
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𝒞h 3. – first date! kinda nervy 😍 . . . masterlist / previous / next !
! DON'T FORGET, WRITTEN PART BELOW THE FIRST 3 SCREENSHOTS !
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it wasn’t long before riki had arrived at your apartment to escort you to the location you’d be meeting the mystery guy at– your best friend patiently sat in his car as you stepped out of the building.
opening the passenger side’s door, you settle into the seat with ease, shutting the door once comfortable. buckling your seatbelt and ensuring all of your necessities were in your purse, you glance at him with a cheeky grin.
“hi, keeks.” you greet in a cheerful tone, excited to finally head out to your date.
“hi, bubba.” he answers in his usual rasp, a small smile tugging his lips upward as he pulls out of his temporary parking space.
he knew full well where he was driving, considering the fact that you loved frozen yogurt, practically purchasing it once a week.
“you excited?” he questions with a quick glance in your direction, his eyebrow raised as he returns his focus to the road.
“ ‘course i am!” you admit with a nod and soft squeal, prepared as ever.
the boy simply hummed in response, the light conversation shifting to comfortable silence– at least for you. riki, on the other hand, was currently experiencing a whirlwind of emotions behind his composed exterior.
the drive was only seven minutes, your best friend parking in front of the frozen yogurt place that held your heart.
“alright, angel. have a good time, be safe, and call me if you need me.” he shifts his torso to face your direction, his words stern as he squints his eyes at you.
laughing softly at the boy’s tone, you mutter a simple “i will, ki,” and place a kiss to his cheek before opening the car door to step out.
“bye, ducky.” you mutter, flashing him a smile before heading toward the entrance to meet taesan.
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“hi! you must be taesan.” your voice interrupts the male’s bubble of solitude, causing him to glance up– eyes widening at your appearance. you were breathtaking, that’s for sure.
“hey! yeah– yeah, that’s me.” he responds with a shake in his voice, nervous as ever for how this date would play out considering you seemed to be so genuine and sweet. at the moment, he wanted to curse riki for his bribe.
standing from his seat, he reached to offer you a handshake in greeting, your hand delicate against his.
“shall we?” you playfully ask, extending your hand toward the station where the cup sizes were placed.
“of course.” he replies, flashing a sweet smile as he places his hand upon your shoulder, guiding you forward with gentle force.
“so, what’re your hobbies?” you ask once you’d gotten the cups for your yogurt, filling yours with the chocolate and vanilla swirl– taesan settling on strawberry.
“ah… my hobbies? well, it’s weird, but i’m into making mud pies.” the boy responds with a grit of his teeth, the embarrassment of his and riki’s deal finally sinking onto his shoulders.
with a laugh and gentle snort, your reaction wasn’t quite as humiliating as he’d expected. “mud pies, huh? maybe it’s a little outdated, but i did the same as a kid.” you try to extend your understanding, finding his answer amusing but nonetheless, cute?
“at least we can somewhat bond over that, yeah?” he playfully asks, raising a brow as his lips quirk into a side smile.
once you two had completed your cups of yogurt with a choice of toppings, taesan insisted on paying for yours, wanting to be a gentleman in the moments he could. after all, he may have to embarrass himself, but he’d still try to be a decent date.
returning to the empty table, you sat across from him– hoping to ask more questions and get to know him before your date came to an end.
“since we’re at froyo… one of my favorite foods– what’s your favorite food?” you ask with a playful glint in your eye, hoping that his previous, odd answer wouldn’t affect the future ones.
coughing slightly, he aggressively patted his chest, ceasing shortly after. “um.. right, my favorite food.” he begins, his mortification masked by his composed facial expressions. “boiled eggs,” taesan blurts, clearing his throat afterward. 
of course, the eggs seemed understandable from your perspective, enjoying boiled eggs on occasion. “ah, i like those too!” you agree with a cheeky grin, tilting your head.
“and… burnt toast.” the boy adds, causing your expression to shift into one of silent confusion– eyes blinking and lips pressed into a thin line, shame building in his chest.
“oh. um, well, we all have our preferences!” you respond sweetly, shoving another spoonful of yogurt into your mouth, disappointment bubbling in your chest.
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what made up for the strange answers taesan had to your questions was the frozen yogurt. if the company was… unique, at least you had a comforting cup of your favorite yogurt flavors and toppings.
you’d both finished eating, the air full of awkward tension, to which you suggested heading outside.
“hey, y/n?” taesan questions with hesitation, hands in his pockets as you stood to the side of the entrance.
“yeah?” you ask, peering up at him with your eyes full of curiosity and lingering hope that the date could shift.
“i… you have to know.” he begins, releasing a sigh in mental preparation of his next words. “i’m totally breedable. and– i worship the ground you walk on. believe me.” he inwardly cringes, that stupid script engraved in his mind. all for thirty bucks.
your lips parted, unable to form a response, eyes blinking rapidly. swallowing the lump in your throat, you flash an awkward, half smile. “um, have a good night, taesan. it was… nice to meet you.” you bid the boy farewell, simply earning a “bye, you too, y/n,” from his end.
that has got to be the worst date you’ve ever been on.
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