#i don't need an explanation for that one
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The Ones Who Live | 1x01 | Years
#THE DOG TAGS STAY ON#Rick Grimes#The Ones Who Live#towl spoilers#*#rg#why did this make me so feral#i would really like to know#because i just.....#also is that a shoulder holster because PLEASE#P L E A S E#i don't need an explanation for that one#feminism is concerned for me rn#where's my rick trash at#because i look like cujo rn#*GLASS BREAKING* *CASH REGISTER NOISES* *CAR HORNS*
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part 2!!!! [read part one here]
transcript below the cut arranged into stanzas to help show where the rhymes are:
“that’s why they brought gem in? as a failsafe?” as a pawn. we were told to point her at whoever we need gone
“gem won’t hurt her allies. …yet.” the curse she carries will it’s had its eye on her since she lost the other eye she was specially selected for her hunting skill it’s quite the high honor. “wow. how generous.” we try
think about it: why does almost no one fight the curse? “given how fast scott killed skizz last season, i can guess.” [“any pain you spare your friends, you’ll have to suffer worse”?] it’s designed to shut down higher reasoning with stress
#if you still can't see the rhyme scheme try reading it out loud#if that doesn't work uh. idk. can't help you#my art#my poetry#grian#geminitay#smajor1995#bdoubleo100#inthelittlewood#secret life#grian and his terrible horrible no good very bad eldritch coworkers: the sequel#cant wait to post the next part so i can be like 'my three secret life comics. and yes they all rhyme'#this one narratively doesn't work nearly as well as a standalone compared to part 1#however i accidentally went way too hard and could probably upload the middle page + second to last panel as their own separate art pieces#tbh i'm considering putting an explanation of everything below the readmore buuut i don't feel like it atm. :3 later maybe#me and my 20+ life series headcanons i only allude to without explicitly stating don't need to explain ourselves#still experimenting with this webtoon-esque vertical comic style#still not sure i like it#it gets long too quickly#among other things#but it's very easy to read on a phone so
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#23.2 Teases
Dan sighed wistfully. He couldn't help but feel jealous as he witnessed the couple kissing.
It must be great to be Grace. He was attractive, rich, powerful, talented, and respected. He had everything every person in the tower could ever wish to have. So it should come as no surprise that even Princess Endorsi would want him.
But despite all that, Dan didn’t want to be in Grace's shoes. Power and fame came with a price, and he knew how hard Grace had to work for it.
Maybe he wasn't actually jealous of Grace's charm. He was just not willing to let his goddess, Princess Endorsi, pick anyone else as her partner.
Dan let the realization sink in, sulking while chewing on another spoonful of meat curry. Gyetang must've felt even sadder than him, considering that his reason to join their team was to meet Princess Endorsi.
"What happened?" the guy in a tracksuit –Sibisu, if he remembered correctly– asked, as he and the others took a seat.
"Princess…" Hatz trailed off. "She used her tag to 'talk' with Grace. And when they returned, Grace had a kiss mark on his cheek."
That was a surprisingly objective summary.
"You know, I realized something after kissing him." Boss commented. He was looking at Princess Endorsi mirthfully. "The kiss mark on his cheek earlier was tilted in an odd way."
Princess Endorsi raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
Boss waited a few beats. Then he shrugged. "Never mind. I was simply sharing my thoughts."
Princess Endorsi gave him a long stare, before her eyes lit up in realization. She chuckled, "How observant."
Dan could only sit there. At least he wasn't the only one that was confused. After all, he didn't really pay attention to the mark position before Grace wiped it out, so he didn't know what kind of odd that Boss meant.
"Woah! Bam–"
The Khun guy whisper-shouted, loud enough to pull Dan out of his thoughts.
"–You learned how to use chopsticks?"
Khun looked pleasantly surprised, and it kind of baffled Dan. He didn't think anyone, especially from the Khun family, could be impressed by such a mere act.
Viole grinned sheepishly. "Yeah. I've wanted to learn it ever since you showed me how."
The smile that crept up on Khun's lips was genuine and fond. It was a familiar expression, one that Dan often saw Boss wearing when he looked at Grace.
He noticed that everyone was also looking at Khun and Viole, as the conversation around died down. Hatsu coughed, and Princess Endorsi rolled her eyes.
Khun, noticing this, glared at everyone. "What?"
Sibisu waved his hand dismissively, grinning. The others avoided eye contact.
Grace smiled as he glanced at Boss…expectantly? Teasingly? Dan couldn't tell.
Boss glanced back at Grace, smirking.
Grace chuckled, as if they were gossiping telepathically.
They did that enough times that Dan had gotten used to it. Exchanging looks without words as if they could read each other's minds. And honestly, Dan wouldn't even be surprised if they revealed that they actually had a telepathic ability.
Khun was now frowning. Dan could imagine two cat ears on his head pointing backwards. "Are you making fun of me?"
Grace quickly waved his hands in front of him. "What? No! I would never."
Boss laughed at Khun, as if daring him. "You are so obvious, it's embarrassing."
Novick coughed, trying to hide his laugh. "It somehow reminded me of that one time Grace tried to make a perfect apple pie, and we ended up having a week’s worth of pies. All because he wanted to impress Boss."
"The pie was delicious. I was impressed." Boss nodded approvingly.
Grace closed his eyes, smiling proudly. "Worth it."
Oh, the lovebirds, Dan thought to himself. Khun must've reminded Boss of himself, which was probably what he and Grace were making fun of earlier.
Princess Anaak raised her hand, palm facing Boss and Grace. "Please don't kiss again. I'm trying to eat."
Dan heard Viole whisper to Khun. "So that's what a kiss is…?" Which was just another whiplash to him.
The more he learned about Viole, the less he fit a slayer candidate's fearsome and mysterious persona. FUG's god, as they called him. He was still a kid at heart, clueless and learning.
"What's up, Blue Turtle? Did you finally find your banana?"
Khun whipped his head, and Dan noticed a light blush on his cheeks. "What does that even mean?! Stupid crocodile."
"I wonder who's actually the stupid one," Hatz shrugged.
Khun growled, took a deep breath, and sighed. "Let's just ignore them, Bam."
It seemed like Khun was used to being antagonized by his own team. But Dan thought that he might understand why.
The strong temptation to tease and nudge the lovebirds, especially when they were so obvious yet clueless. Case in point: Grace and Agni, when Dan was new to their team. He couldn't keep himself from smiling at the memory.
He enjoyed Grace's old team’s company so far. He used every opportunity to join the conversation, especially when everyone started bickering and exchanging stories. The cafeteria had never been so lively before with only the five of them.
The chaotic energy that Grace's old team brought was like adding new flavors into the mix. Only time could tell whether it was a good combination or not, but he hoped that they'd get along. Especially because it would be a lifelong regret if he were to lose the chance to have Princess Endorsi around.
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☕ Buy me coffee ☕
Bonus explanation under the cut:

#Happy new year! I' have returned~ (re)starting the story with a jelly fanboy. a hint of kb. and agr team offscreen event. wheee#I hope the bonus explanation image is enough because idk how to put that into words#I used my break time to reread ToG S2 from the start up until end of workshop battle. and oh boy do I have a lot to think about#There are some details that I forget. so I need to consider some changes into the plot that I had cooked before#and that's why I have a good news and bad news for you:#good news is that we're approacing the end of S2 (6 more updates. woohoo) and soon we will finally get to the exciting season 3!#(like damn I can't wait to finally have SnS into the story. you don't understand how much I yearn for them 😭💖)#bad news is...I *might* take another hiatus after valentine 😅 to plan things and stock up some drafts (again)#Though it's still one and a half month so do enjoy the ride until then~#tower of god#tog#two sides of the same coin fic#my fic#the 25th baam#the 25th bam#jue viole grace#koon#khun a.a#khun aguero agnis#khunbam#koonbaam#bamxkhun#shibisu#ship leesoo#endorsi jahad#rak wraithraiser#edin dan#novick#gyetang
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the great thing about falling really deep into a new media niche is developing opinions on many new things. the terrible thing about falling really deep into a new media niche is developing opinions on many new things
#fjdkfdjkfd.#anyway. last week a trailer came out for something only called kidnap. which is hilarious because that's a blocked tumblr tag#it's a romance (with the kidnapper. who is secretly only doing it to pay a medical bill). i don't think it sounds or looks very good#& considering who is airing this and their history with Edgy Content the keyword here will probably be Bland. or maybe Toothless#but unfortunately...... tragically...... one of the leads is an actor i'll take in literally anything.#so i've spent my week periodically being attacked by this insignificant bit of knowledge and experiencing shrimp emotions#literally just. going about my day. thinking 'kidnap'. going OOF. then remembering i'm in the middle of brushing my teeth#also. i found out the original writer of bad romance & together with me is ALSO the writer of not me. and it's things like this#that would take like. twenty layers of explanation of these properties in general and also my takes on them specifically#and how it contrasts or aligns with their general perception. to even come CLOSE to explaining the mental hit i took from that#i need a corkboard and some red thread. and then probably three more corkboards#for day 1 that is. i think i have a week's worth of loosely connected spontaneous deep dive video essays i could do off the top of my head#ah well. the curse of having interests#*
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I'll contain my rambling explanations in the tags but believe me there are layers here that I tried to convey
[A Soft Place To Land from Waitress // vaultknight + Rose Maclean/Moldaver]
#First of all Waitress felt like a choice that made even more sense when I thought about it then when I first picked it so that's a layer#Starting with the one you'd need non-Fallout context for#I was gonna do a whole explanation but I am so sleepy I just realised#On the most basic level relevant to this song is a woman keeping her mother's idealistic outlook on things#But ALSO moving on to the parallels I see with Maximus and Rose#Both attempted to leave the highly controlled environment they'd been raised on when they realised there was a better alternative#(Maximus going form the BoS -> the vault and Rose from the vault -> Shady Sands)#But both fail to do so because they're pursued by the place/people they tried to escape#Maximus is dragged back into the Brotherhood and Rose was bombed by her husband#Both places viewed them as something to fill a role (wife+mother. Squire.) and not as a full person#But there's also a little parallel between Maximus and Moldaver in the Moldaver's final scene where Maximus is calling out for Lucy#then moments later Moldaver stumbles in and calls for Rose#I go so crazy for Maximus and for my implied lesbians guys. You don't even understand bc I forgot until just now but oughhhhhh#Obviously there's the fact they both fall in love with a Maclean woman who's recently left the vault for the first time#And apparently Lucy is just like her mum it's so oughhhhhh#God I love this showwwwww#fallout edit#maximus fallout#lucy maclean#fallout show#rose maclean#lee moldaver
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next // previous
october 3, 2021 2:00 p.m. morensong coffee house
[grant] thank you for meeting me so last minute.
[cerise] yeah, it’s no problem! actually, i'm glad we could do this sooner rather than later. this has been at the back of my mind for a while–the curiosity has–so when you texted me yesterday, i was, like, i need to know. i may be going out of town for a week, but i'll try to make room in the schedule for this before i leave.
[grant] are you traveling anywhere exciting?
[cerise] iceland. it’s a big family trip to celebrate my parents’ 20th anniversary. as in, my mom and my stepdad’s anniversary. i mean, he’s my real dad as far as i'm concerned, but technically my stepdad. i think you get what i mean, i don’t know why i'm over-explaining.
[grant] wow, that is exciting. well, i hope you guys have fun. i hear it’s just as gorgeous there as you think it is.
[cerise] anyway, thank you again for asking your–our, i guess; that’s still weird to say–dad some questions on my behalf. i'm sure that wasn’t easy.
[grant] i should warn you that it’s not necessarily a wealth of information.
[cerise] that’s okay.
[grant] there was a lot going on when i talked to him, and if there were other questions i could have asked…
[cerise] it’s okay.
[grant] i wouldn’t have been able to think of them, and now, uh, the line of communication is closed, so i can’t really go back and...
[cerise] i said it was okay, didn’t i?
[cerise] the basics are enough, and you already put yourself out for a stranger. if i want to know anything else, i'll find the right moment to get my my mom talk about what happened.
[grant] do you want me to just get right into it?
[cerise] whatever you prefer.
[grant] so, uh, essentially, my parents were attending a medical conference of some kind in detroit. they were still married then, but my dad was unhappy with the relationship. he met your mom at the conference, and then he had–as far as i'm aware–a one-night stand with her. she found out my dad already had a family, they agreed to not be in each other’s lives, and he paid her child support.
[grant] that’s what i know. i'm sure there’s more to it, but...
[grant] oh! right, “the more” is that there is a nonzero chance we have more siblings out there.
[cerise] huh.
[cerise] i'm almost surprised there isn’t more drama. that’s a pretty mundane story. a one-night stand with someone you know nothing about is the oldest story in the book.
[cerise] weird, i feel better now. my curiosity is sated. well, i am wondering how the affair even happened if your mom was right there and about the potential other children, but that’s a whole can of worms.
[grant] well, i'm glad you feel better.
[cerise] and the story does make sense. i always wondered if there was some big thing with the secrecy, but if it’s because your–our?–dad was a married man, i get it. my mom is a very good person with strong morals. i know her, and she would not want anything to do with someone if she were aware they were cheating and had a family, and she wouldn’t want me to have any business with them either.
[grant] she made the right decision to stay away. he’s unnecessary. your lives are a billion times better off without him. if you’re thinking, “how can he say that?” just trust me.
[cerise] i mean, i can’t be upset about it. i'm not sure what i potentially lost out on, but what i've had in life with my parents has been perfect or just about perfect, so i'm not going to question her choice.
[grant] you didn’t lose anything. not to say trust me again, but trust me.
[cerise] i'm sorry. this probably is far less of a flippant thing for you.
[grant] don’t worry about me. it’s all good.
[grant] i am just really glad you feel better, and i'm glad i could be of some use to you as well. it’s a lot easier to use me than your mom. i have never met her, but i'm guessing she’d prefer to just forget about all this stuff, and i hope she has.
[cerise] i was frustrated she wouldn’t tell me the truth, but i get it now. this may be a classic story, but it’s still, you know, an embarrassing one. if i found out my boyfriend were a married man tomorrow, i would melt into the floor and stay there.
[grant] anyway, i know we’ve been sitting here all of ten minutes, but i should let you go. once i finish drinking this coffee, i will get out of your hair. you have things to do–exciting things. go pack and travel and have fun and all that.
[cerise] hey, you don’t have to leave already!
[grant] no, i don’t want to take up your afternoon. at least no more than enough to tell you what you were waiting a few weeks to hear.
[cerise] i mean, i blocked out time to do that and talk to you generally for a bit.
[cerise] i don’t know how to go about all this, but i wasn’t planning on benefiting off your connection to your–our?–dad and then peacing out. i figured we could be acquainted, if nothing else.
[cerise] unless that’s too much for you, in which case, totally get it. no pressure. my existence must be weird for your mom and siblings. i'm assuming you have siblings.
[cerise] or maybe they don’t know. i also get it if you’re keeping this situation on the down-low. i can assure you that you’d not be alone in that. i'm not sure i could tell my parents right now that i know about my origins or that i've met my bio dad’s son. not yet.
[grant] definitely don’t do that before the big anniversary trip. but no, don’t worry about that either. i don’t have siblings. not anymore. and my mom...let’s not even go there. there’s nothing to worry about on those fronts.
[grant] it’s not that it’s too much, basically. i have zero problems with you, and i have no family left who would have a problem with you either, so.
[grant] i just don’t want to be in your way, not today or at any point in the future, and i will be. you don’t need my dad around; you don’t really need me either.
[cerise] i don’t care if you are, honestly. you are my brother. that feels weird to say, but you are, and you haven’t done anything wrong. i'd like to know my brother.
[cerise] this is maybe the only regretful, i don’t know if that’s the right word, part of all the secrecy and the way i came to be. i get along with my step-siblings. what’s wrong with getting along with the half-siblings? or half-sibling?
[grant] i should have also warned you i'm kind of in a dour mood entirely because of my dad. sorry. not because of you or this whole thing, though, to be clear.
[grant] i wanted to meet to get all this off my mind so i have no other reason to think about him, hopefully, for the rest of my life. i'll be in a more conversational mood soon-ish, once i'm done thinking about him.
[grant] this is going to make me wishy-washy. i don’t want to be in your way; i don’t want to be a source of awkwardness in your family if they ever know you know me, but…
[grant] okay. i wouldn’t mind getting along with my half-sibling. maybe we could meet up when you have time again.
[cerise] yeah, i'll text you. i might be busy for a while with work when i'm back from my trip, but…
[grant] text me anytime. we’ll figure it out.
#ts4#the sims 4#sims 4#sims 4 story#sims 4 storytelling#simblr#hlcn: everything the stars promised#holocene.docx#holocene.png#hlcn: grant#hlcn: cerise#i needed to wrap up this subplot and also this is a nice ending i think thematically to this arc#yes y'all we are finally moving on to something new very soon#anyway why i think this is a nice wrap up is because the last few scenes with grant were about being rejected by his father and kelly etc#which takes place in a long legacy of people who shouldn't neglect grant doing it anyway (parents partners etc)#and those who treat him well are typically the ones who don't necessarily have to#varpu for one#and now cerise#OH and it's also growth for grant#when he gets those feelings that he's a nuisance he does typically tend to act on them#and he certainly tried to here but he didn't carry out his tendency to just flee and confirm his own notions about himself#it did take some further explanation from cerise but that doesn't matter because the point is that he DID stop himself from running off#anyway i could say more but i shall leave the rambling there for now#i am seriously just glad to move on to the next era of this story because this arc was burning me out baddddd#which is why i admit i did not work as hard to make the pictures all amazing or to turn the text into proper prose#i just wanted to get it done and the plot points across rip sorry
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I was digging through my WIPs and found these, so have some late Valentine's Day cards at the very nice date of end of February
#miitopia#miitopia spoilers#feeling like internet explorer right now#I've been so busy I forgot it was February#I should really get back to reblogging stuff#and actually drawing#eventually#soon#I tried my best with the references and stuff#I think the only one that needs an explanation is the fossil one#so context is that you can determine how old a fossil is through radiometric dating#and radiometric dating relies on knowing about radioactive decay and isotopes#other than that I think the rest of these are pretty standard#long post#my stuff#I was thinking I could just wait until next year to post these#but alas it turns out if I don't post it sometime I will never post it ever#I still have a Halloween drawing in my drafts..... hm.
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Watching Severance does feel a bit like reading a fic with 15000 word chapters that are almost entirely world-building and setup and there are only 2/47 chapters published and those came out 3 years apart
#the same sense of teetering uncertainty. like there is something in someone's mind but will it get out? probably not#the thing that gives me hope is there's a pretty strong track record of simplifying and circling back to plot points#instead of casting the net of things that happen ever wider (looking at you orphan black)#many of the very weird nonsensical elements are meant to just be weird and nonsensical. like yes there's a severed marching band#no we don't need to explore that any further it just is what it is#ms cobel seemed like a weird outlier to the plot but they tied her in exactly to the heart of it#(by the way i know none of you know about this but one thing i immediately realized that i don't think other tumblrites saw#is that her mrs selvig behavior in s1 was not a trick either in her different demeanor or her apparent care for mark#he is not just her science experiment. his outie—and her mrs selvig ''outie''—are her creations free from the company#she truly wanted to be able to perpetuate the kier lumon cult of abuse and control but also set people free of it#it's why she created severance and why she is nasty only to innie mark. he deserves that treatment like she thinks she did growing up#but she made a way for only part of him to deserve that while the rest of him doesn't. she genuinely respects his outie#and wants him to thrive and have a full life outside lumon. separate from his innie. that's her WHOLE DEAL)#anyway where was i#oh yeah so she's hooked right into the heart of the simple central idea and everything she does makes sense in that lens#the birthing cabin bit came back to facilitate a key plot movement and that mystery got solved and laid to rest very simply#(laid to rest as in we know the explanation AND it doesn't give our main characters a further task to accomplish#which i'm just realizing is a huge distinction in storytelling)#it's the whole chikhai bardo thing of the big secret at the heart of Severance is just. severance.#and even in the s2 finale the agenda was very simple and stayed the same throughout and the climactic tension was still just severance#like oh she's in the basement? we'll just get her out#the drama came from all the established pieces colliding on the outcome of that#rather than from that goal getting thwarted#idk man it's Good Storytelling enough to make me willing to trust it#severance#severance spoilers
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Hi Bel! If YOU could make an expansion, what would you theme it around?
I've been thinking about this ask for 2 days and I still don't know, there are so many things I would want to go into it. It's impossible for me to choose. Possibly my biggest interest is exploring the universe in some way and uncovering its history.
Instead, I am asking all of YOU what would you theme an expansion around. Put it in the tags.
#destiny 2#ask#one of the things i would like is more on the vex and especially VOLANTIS. LET ME GO THERE#i would make an entire expansion about this 100%#i thought also maybe some of the more niche lore stuff like the aphelion but i actually don't want it. i want it to be a mystery forever#like i won't be mad if it happens but i prefer some stuff to remain strange and unknowable. not everything needs an explanation#same thing with exploring the universe. i would like some stuff explored but not all#some of it has to stay forever out of reach#otherwise the setting ends up feeling too small. good scifi knows when to stop. destiny has been really good with it so far
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I feel the need to remind everyone that Thailand is a very Buddhistic country
(source)
#affair the series#but also every other#gl drama#bl drama#ql drama#btw this is stuff you also learn in therapy#and for the dumb ones: this is not my opinion on certain characters#but an explanation why Wan and Pleng decided to forgive certain people in order to move on#and it's not anyone elses business on who these two decide to forgive. it's theirs. and the ones who wrote the script#you can disagree but don't let that out on me#also this is a fictional series#these two could have blown up Eks room with Wans mom in it if they wanted to. I wouldn't mind either.#[yall need to read that text again to understand what forgiveness means what it doesn't mean and what its purpose is...]#[hint: it doesn't mean forgetting nor condoning... it means letting go of bad feelings that bind you to bad events and people]
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#21 - Wall
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☕ Buy me coffee ☕
#really just want to see agni (and grace) being cool 😳 if that's not obvious enough#忠 on hatz's back means loyal#the sky is filled with shinsu loops (inspired by water dragon heavy storm technique but less destructive in exchange for wider range)#also if you haven't connected the dots yet. grace and jinsung are having a spar somewhere. and Agni is keeping it inside a massive barrier#he set up the barrier with shinsu devices ofc. not purely Agni's power. we can see him doing some typing there since he controls it#Also I forget if i have it written on future chapter or discarded it on this update script. but just in case i don't. here's an explanation#the barrier was meant to keep the chaos inside to stay inside. but because the shinsu on lower floors aren't as concentrated as upper floor#and shinsu inside the barrier was condensed with Grace's power. If the barrier was completely blocked off it'd be easy to suffocate inside#so they need the outside shinsu to be able to cross inside or Agni wouldn't be able to stay inside. Thus I imagine it like a one way valve#it's easy to cross from the outside but hard to get out without deactivating the barrier. and that was why Hatz was trapped#Laure on the prev chpt must've noticed that the flow of shinsu got siphoned somewhere and thus the 'something is wrong' feeling#but no one else notice bc it'd prob feel like a passing breeze. considering with how big a floor is#tower of god#tog#two sides of the same coin comic#my comic#my art#khun#koon#khun a.a#khun aguero agnis#hatz#rak wraithraiser#rak
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women who were the only girl with F/F ships in their mostly-sapphic teen friend group, and had to feign interest in the Pretty Gay Anime Boys Of The Week to talk to their friends at all, deserve financial compensation
#fandom#why do so many queer women only like M/M ships? like I've heard the 'it's less personal so I can enjoy it more' explanation and You Do You!#but I don't think I'll ever fully understand#and my god was it tiresome in my teen years#I was the only one who cared about the female characters like 75% of the time- and we were all queer girls!#we'd all read the same book or manga and I'd be like 'so when female main character-'#only to get steamrolled with 'OMG THIS GUY AND THIS GUY ARE MY EVERYTHING!!! THEY NEED TO GET MARRIED!!!' from all sides#repeat for every. single. thing. we all watched or read together#and if I liked something that didn't have shippable men nobody else would engage with it
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making my last stand. i am wrangling the formatting and references
#I DID FINISH THE WRITING!!!!!! I DID IT!!!!!!!!#I HOPE IT'S GOOD ENOUGH. PLEASE BE GOOD ENOUGH#it's nearly 5k words but ive only really used two sources and i feel bad about that#twenty footnotes for the same book.#but considering the fact that my access to any sources at all is severely limited and also i don't have the TIME#we're just gonna make do!!! we're just gonna do it!!!!!#and the thesis requirements are 'at least One text source' so the bar. is not high#I JUST NEED TO. FIND A STRAIGHTFORWARD EXPLANATION OF THE APA REFERENCE SYSTEM PLEASE.#JUST BEAM IT INTO MY BRAIN AND INSTALL IT FOR ME PLEAS.
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things I wish I could relive for the first time again:
that magical window where you finish a new piece of media, having watched/read it all by yourself with no fandom contact whatsoever, and you are just so happy about it, and full of interesting theories and takeaways, and just in love with it as a gorgeous piece of art.
because I swear to god as soon as you join the fandom for anything, you're bombarded with how you're supposed to view characters and their arcs, how you're supposed to morally and ethically judge the plot and the ways it apparently failed to present the right message, and if you don't you'll either be shunned for not sharing the popular headcanons or you'll be harassed for not criticizing the source material enough.
like how is it that the fans of a piece of media are also the ones being the most negative about it? If I like a show or a movie or a book, well, I liked it. That's kind of the point. I'm actually not here to tear it apart and talk about how it didn't live up to standards other people had! I enjoyed it for what it was, and forcing myself to find negative things to say about it doesn't actually bring me more enjoyment of it or reap any benefit to me. Fandom's a double-edged sword; you want to join a community to share your love for a piece of art, and the price you pay for a modicum of joy is a mountain of negativity. that's one main reason that I never engage with fandom until I'm completely done with a show, because if I was plugged into all of that commentary and discourse during the process, I'd be completely colored by how I'm expected to interpret everything this piece of art is presenting to me without being able to even form my own opinions.
#this is currently about arcane but it's also every fandom i've been in since the dawn of time#there is so much political discourse about how the show handled the piltover zaun conflict and class struggle and i just#like i don't even know what to say besides. art doesn't have to provide the correct answer you know#it's not asking you to accept their explanation as the right one. it's just presenting a story. a scenario. a nuanced one at that#which of course the internet is the enemy of nuance as we know#especially in arcane i thought it was fairly clear that the end wasn't the bright shining future anyone hoped it'd be.#was anyone right in their actions? did anything turn out the way they wanted? or was it just as messy and gray as real life#we're living in such a myopic time for art where it's believed every story must take the correct stance or be invalid or even harmful#instead of just offering a perspective. a lived experience. a hypothetical. a story.#and when it gets to be headache inducing all I can do is take myself back to how I felt when I watched the show for the first time#and I came away from the whole thing being incredibly moved and captivated by the entire story and its nuance.#i had no qualms and no criticisms and i was very impressed with the depth of storytelling surrounding the political parts of the plot#as well as the character arcs. i guess people like to dunk on viktor's s2 arc nowadays and i just. shrug. i was blown away by it#for me at least i have nothing but pure love and admiration for art after i've viewed it. it's only after interacting with fandom#that the criticisms seep in and now i can't unsee it and even if i don't agree with it it still muddies my ability to enjoy the art#fandom is a curse in that sense. like i seek out art that i enjoy. i have no desire to make myself dislike that art. whats the point#why are the biggest haters of a piece of media the 'fans' of it idk.#me finishing a show: wow i love all the characters and the plot and the cinematography! I want to talk to others about how cool it is!#meanwhile the fandom hating characters to the point of death threats to their creators#after 13 years in fandom i can say this - if you don't need to join the fandom for smth then don't lmao.#you'll be able to retain your genuine enjoyment of the thing.#that whole 'if you didnt like what i made then make your own' philosophy people use on fanfic/fanart should be applied more#to actual published art too. you should be able to meet art where it's at and if you don't like what it's saying or how it looks then#just move on and find something else. another branch of the 'the greatest enemy of the left is the left' tree imo#a show has a lot of queer rep? bash it to the point of making the creators go into hiding for not doing it how you think it should be#no artist will ever be able to satisfy everyone's demands. they just want to put their experiences and ideas into the world#creators that try to do good get more vitriol than those who never try. they're scrutinized harder and judged more harshly#it's just. one of those 'real fucking tired of fandom' nights. the best cure is just going back and rewatching the source material#all on your own and falling back in love with it. just you and your genuine connection with the art.#anyway what happened to steven universe was unforgiveable and it really ruined fandom for me. like. yall don't deserve nice things
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HE CAN USE CORA-SAN'S POWER???? D':
omhuguuuuddddddddh
my whole chest hurts
I wasn't ready for this
#how how how how hoooooow#it wasn't his own room-version of it either it looked exactly like when cora did it. right?#WAS IT THE POWER OF LOVE?#I'll take that as explanation I don't need logic actually#don't even want logic at this point#muh emotions T___T#what I do want though is that devil fruit because oh man I would have so much use for that in my daily life#might not be the most impressive set of powers but they're what I would pick if I could have any in the OP universe. no hesitation#calm calm#trafalgar law live reaction#INTENSE reactions right now#one piece#one piece spoilers
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i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .
#hhhhHHHGHGHHHHHH#jay screams into the void#(deeply personal rant incoming feel free to ignore)#a friend of mine has just been undiagnosed with bpd which . lovely for them but it sure as fuck invites a Lot of questions#suddenly a great deal of previous shitty behaviour that was excused on the basis of bpd has a lot more to answer for#(obligatory I Know BPD Isn't An Excuse To Treat People Like Shit . im aware . i have bpd myself and i have v high standards re my behaviour)#(however allowances were made bc they were unmedicated & out of therapy through no fault of their own)#(and our whole group has enough experience with untreated mental illness to understand that it can make u a bitch sometimes)#but yeah no there have been a LOT of instances of b&w thinking + manipulation + unfair judgement + high emotion + snap reactions#and every situation Could be explained by untreated bpd and the bad times have never been prolonged or often enough to outweigh the good#but Hoo Boy if that wasn't bpd then what the FUCK was it#like either the new psychiatrist is wrong (possible but i seem to be the only one questioning it) or they're just Like That#and again . not enough to outweigh their numerous positive and loveable traits#but the whole group has been destabilised on a number of occasions due to their actions during a bad spell#and i'm really not sure Any Other Explanation is enough to justify that#ah well . this seems like the kind of thing that will eventually come up during a sleepover heart to heart#but rn i'm stuck in a bubble of MAJOR rsd & brainfuck abt it . which is unfortunate bc now is exactly the time i Don't need brainfuck#anyways ✨ goodnight tumblrinas i am . kind of hoping nobody read this bc i fear i sound like a bitch#i am genuinely happy for their undiagnosis it seems to have put many things into perspective for them & theyre v happy about it#i'm just . uncomfy w some aspects of it that i have only been halfway brave enough to discuss with them personally#That's One To Bring Up With My Therapist In A Few Weeks#Bit Of A Shame I'm No Longer In Therapy And Now Have Only 2 Quarterly Reviews Left Before I'm Discharged From The Service
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