#i don't mean it reads like a racist slur towards men i mean it's way too reminiscent of the word negroid

[radelenagreco]

i'm #newtoradblr i've spent so much time these past two weeks scrolling through radfem blogs i knew i had to make an actual radfem side of tumblr blog for my own sanity. the way i "peaked" is kinda funny 3-4 months ago i liked a radfem post without realizing and all of a sudden i had other radfem posts recommended to me by the algorithm and i was so annoyed because i was very anti-terf etc but for a couple days i read through a bunch of radfem blogs and it was actually such a relief to encounter FEMINISM not some watered down version of it but i felt guilty due to 5+ years of conditioning (and also because i had a nonbinary friend sitting right next to me in class as i was doing this) and i also didn't like the prominent use of the word moid? but anyway, 3 months later, i'm not sure why but the mra nature of the trans movement has grown so much more apparent to me i have like three mutuals who are trans men on my other blog and i would find myself rereading the few feminist posts i would reblog/write because these people are literally reblogging shit like "don't think like a terf. men aren't your oppressors, they're your friends/neighbors/brothers/fathers. if you think that any man could harm you you have been fooled by terf rhetoric" like actual morons/meninists. anyway two weeks ago i saw a post made by someone i knew was a radfem on my twitter tl and i don't know why i knew i was ready i went through her blog and through many others and now here i am.

[doberbutts]

I can't understand the idea that someone outside of an oppressed group cannot be victims of violence towards that oppressed group. That anon you deleted, the one who got mad and went "so cis people can experience transphobia!?!" Have you not read the news lately? What? What is happening to Imane Khalif right now? When you are past some arbitrary "acceptable range" of looks, behavior, etc., you become a target. As a cis woman who grew up in a conservative area, having "boyish interests" was enough for me to be subject to slurs and abuse. And it stuck around past that, because I have a small chest and broad shoulders, a long face. Whatever. Systems of oppression effect everyone under them because they all rely on "passing". You are required to reach a bar and to look and perform in certain ways and that bar is ever changing.

Well, that's why when someone was in my replies being upset that I asked how Khelif could be considered TME when transmisogyny was actively happening to her, one of the things I responded to said person was:

I don't understand how discussion the widespread effect of a systemic form of oppression and how it affects other things or is used as a weapon in other things, at all damages or erases the conversation that said systemic form of oppression is a problem. If anything, it's spreading further awareness.

I understand if the concern is that not enough people are caring about the trans women to whom transmisogyny happens on a regular basis, and are instead only ever caring about non trans fems and their relationship with being on the receiving end of transmisogyny. That is a problem, and it's one that does need to be talked about more often.

However I don't think any other form of oppression is specifically locked to only the people who identify as that oppressed demographic. Men experience misogyny. White people experience racism. Abled people experience ableism. "You throw like a girl" "you're not my daughter if you marry that black man" "what are you, deaf?" these are all things that are experienced by the "wrong" demographic, because in truth? The demographic doesn't matter.

These are systems we're talking about- the system of misogyny is what leads boys who fail to be masculine enough to be compared to girls as a way to state they are inferior, because the point is that with the system of misogyny, girls are inherently inferior to boys. Therefore, calling a boy a girl is calling him weaker, lesser, and not good enough.

The system of racism is what leads white parents to disown their children if their children date outside of their race. The point is that under the system of racism, interracial dating is seen as an aberration, and these racist parents then reject their own children for daring to love someone who is not white.

The system of ableism is what leads people to make comparisons to disability when bringing up someone's shortcomings. Disabled people are largely seen as failures in abled society, so by pointing to disability whenever faced with what is perceived as inadequacy, the system of ableism operates to continue to associate being disabled with worthlessness, and being abled with having worth.

Hell, it was not that long ago that "gay" and "retarded" were used as synonyms for "bad" and "stupid". Some people still use these words that way. It was a fucking Rick and Morty joke a few years ago, this isn't ancient history.

So when I'm told that I don't experience a system of oppression based solely on my labeled demographic and not on my actual lived experience, my immediate first thought is "that's not how systems of oppression work, literally everyone experiences these things in different ways, because that's what is meant when we call something systemic, it means the entire fucking system is built around this as a crux of logic"

Which is very weird to me then when someone tells me that by saying Khelif is/was experiencing transmisogyny, I'm erasing trans women. How? I genuinely don't understand how that's possible when I'm saying that the explicit hatred and fear of the trans woman boogeyman is what led us here in the first place. I am saying "this comes directly from people pushing transmisogynistic rulings for years and was always going to be the end result when they finally excluded all the actual trans women". I'm saying "it was bad logic when applied to trans women and it's bad logic even now, being applied to a [self-identified] perisex cisgender 'biological' woman and we should have put our foot down about it years ago when trans women and intersex women were actually competing".

Transmisogyny is a system of oppression. The system is functioning normally even when it fires at targets it's "not supposed to". That's what happens under systemic oppression. That's a feature, not a bug.

[eddiediazismyhusband]

the weponizing of gayness is getting out of hand. you're called a homophobe if you don't ship two people. you're called a homophobe if you don't like a gay character because of their racist and misogynistic past. i genuinely don't believe that a lot of these people have ever been exposed to real bigotry in their entire lives, or they're just straight

Like i’ve said most of the people I’ve seen making these takes are either straight white cis women or white cis gay men who both have an insane amount of privilege in the community to the point that the plights of others aren’t on their radar….

like im not saying they haven’t experienced any kind of discrimination, i am sure they have, but being cisgender white people, there is a level of privilege there that refracts their view of what bigotry actually looks like to a certain degree that they view anything critical of their interests as being violently homophobic.

i myself am a white gay amab person (i’m nonbinary, but I am passing for male) so I definitely have a certain level of privilege that has protected me from being directly discriminated against in ways I’ve seen my non-white queer friends be treated. that being said (and i am by no means perfect) i do my best to check my privilege before blowing something out of proportion just because it inconveniences or annoys me.

i’ve mentioned on here briefly before that i have faced a lot of discrimination from others growing up in church. my mother sent me to a doctor asking him to try and “fix” me when she found out i was gay. i have been called slurs by people who claim to be “god-loving christians” for just existing within that space. i have been harassed and berated by family members over my queerness because they think the jokes don’t sting (and they don’t care if they do). I’m not saying this to ask for sympathy and pity; I have worked through this in therapy, and I have moved on and attempt to rebuild relationships and salvage what I can. But I say this to provide context of my own experiences as s queer person.

A lot of white queer people have experienced this, but a lot haven’t. A lot of them have grown up in far more accepting environments and only know of bigotry towards queer people from reading/seeing it in media. They see these events and in their inability to understand them within the context of their own experience, they equate their own everyday inconveniences to these things because as humans we often have a desire to be coddled and pitied, so when we aren’t the center of attention for pity, we try to force ourselves into it by blowing things out of proportion, or claiming bigotry and homophobia when that is not the case. The “give me sympathy” card is a staple in the white queer person’s wallet.

Unfortunately, for poc queer people, and non-cisgender people who aren’t ‘passing’ they experience a different level of discrimination and violent bigotry that a lot of white queer people have never experienced. Now that is not to say that white cis queer people have never been the victims of violence, they absolutely have and there are plenty of cases out there to prove it. The fact is that for poc queer people, violent bigotry is often the standard for discrimination they experience. And that is something that unless you have experienced it yourself, you will never really understand the affects that has on a person.

so this idea that disliking a queer character is somehow homophobic comes from a place of blatant privilege. it comes from people who want you to look at them and say “ohhh poor ____, they’re being discriminated against because this fictional character is being criticized for his own bigotry within canon” rather than acknowledging that queer people are not inexcusable of bad behavior. they don’t understand that calling other queer people homophobic for having valid criticisms of a character and the way their story has been handled only shows queer people as this melodramatic clump of people who cry wolf over things that are not im fact actually conducive of homophobia.

I’m sorry I kind of turned this into a discussion of the hierarchy of queer privilege and how it negatively affects the entire community when the privileged minority are loudly complaining about things they don’t like by throwing around the word “homophobic” but unfortunately that seems to be where we are at in this fandom. I didn’t touch much on the straight white cis women of it all, but unfortunately straight white cis women are always trying to steamroll queer people when it comes to discussing queer issues so this is just par for the course.

[aliennazero]

Not CSM related, but the fucked up realization I had after I reread early « What It Means to be You » manhwa chapters is that every nobles who had encounter with Winter is either racist or super greedy. No wonder he's so angry when Violet accidentally call him a slur, an "outsider".

I think this is another thing than family abuse that most manhwa readers often forgot when talking about his characterization and his motives. Why he has inferior complex. Why he thinks everyone must hate him. Why he is so materialistic.

I'm talking about "Internalized racism."

And it's NOT even subtext, this narratives is a SLAP on the face. But even after that, I never found any other fellow readers talked about this.

Let's be real here. The first thing the Margrave family thought to get a business deal with him is not to do an actual meeting but using millitary forces. The old nobles are legit willing to do brutality just because they see him lesser than them. If not because of their son stopping them, they will absolutely fkin did that.

Even Violet's NICEST friends are subtly racist towards Winter.... They got called out by Winter HIMSELF, but no one bat an eye. No one read it this way, right?

This racism is systematical. It passed through older generation to the young. Even though it seems to be tamer than the old days, it's still there. The generational traumas, the stereotypes, "the uneasiness" are still there.

Real sad hours to think Winter outwardly admit that he don't want to have kids who would looks like him (silver eyes, etc) with Violet in the early WIMTBY days because he don't want his kids to experience the same racial traumas as him. To the point he prefer Violet to have kids with another man. This is another level of pain and I'm sfwhskawlalsl 😭😭😭.

It's always "Oh, Winter is so bad" , "Why he is so insecure, he's rich! His life is better now why he still think of his past!" , "Winter is so cruel to other person except Violet" etc etc, but never "He become cruel like that because it's his defend mechanism. For him, being seen as intimidating is better than being seen as weak and get oppressed because of that."

If that's not a product of racism, I don't know what it is.

There's no winning in this situation, man. I think I just hit myself with a massive brick. This is what happen when rofan author decided to put a little bit too much realism in their works. It's a great portrayal though. It just that... not everyone get it at first reading.

"So you want us to reread WIMTBY? Are you insane?"

Yes. I know I sound crazy when I say WIMTBY is my comfort read. But really, there's so much to unwrap here that might not seems obvious until some reread. It's not just an angst p000rn when you realized the deeper meanings behind it.

And I don't want to see anyone compare Winter to literal r4p1st like Ruve and Alecto ever again. He never tried to abuse Violet in any way, it's purely miscommunication. His character is a product of racism that resulted in toxic masculinity. He is not close to allat tr4shy men.

[thebirkenstocksocialist]

If you're still in the mood for asks: In that meta about Kristina that I keep talking about you mentioned that how August is homophobic would be a whole seperate post. So. Wanna write it? Sorry if that's not particulaly uplifting but I'd love to hear your thoughts!

CW: Discussion of homophobia and hate. Please pass on this one if your heart doesn't need it today darlings.

Oof. I have been sitting on this ask because I feel a bit nervous to write about it? I think that is mostly because I have anxiety and am not in the mood to ruffle feathers. But I suppose, that fear often means that what I have is important to say. Not always, sometimes it means I need to shut the hell up. But, I think it's the former in this situation so here we go.

When I first started writing for the YR fandom, I got a comment that confused me early on. The writer essentially said that August's actions, in releasing the video, were not homophobic. I was floored. This person posited that August would have done the same thing if Simon had been a girl, and thus the action wasn't homophobic. I made a clear statement that this argument wouldn't be tolerated then I locked the thread. (Also please let it lie if you are reading this. Don't go looking. The situation is done and I set my boundary. Thanks lovies).

I felt surprised that people sort of qualified August's actions? Like folks didn't necessarily think he is homophobic? Not just this initial interaction, but others I have experienced in casual conversation.

So I supposed I would like to address the issue without any speculation about what August would or wouldn't do. Let's just work with what we have in cannon:

August taped Wilhelm and Simon having sex then released it to the world without their permission.

I feel comfortable saying August was shocked and disgusted by what he saw, but I suppose that edges toward speculation.

But, based only on his observable behaviors, what August did was an overt act of homophobic violence. To out another person is violent. Full stop. It immediately places the outed individual(s) at risk of direct harm.

Outing an individual is homophobic. I don't feel comfortable minimizing homophobia. In the same way I wouldn't expect a person of color to minimize any of my racist actions, as a white woman, as just plain "ignorance", I don't expect queer people to minimize acts of homophobia because they are done out of ignorance. Teaching someone gently is a gift, not a requirement.

But, the thing is, August was absolutely aggressive. He definitely intended harm when he share this video. He didn't call Wille and Simon to the table and rib them for a hookup (which would still be an act of homophobic violence btw) - he broadcast their sexual encounter with the public to shame and ridicule. He did this to cause harm.

So, I suppose I have felt sad that there has been what I experience as minimizing homophobia within the fandom because August isn't, like, overtly hateful? He doesn't use slurs, or say he wishes queer people were dead, or tell them they are going to hell. If the bar for homophobia is outright hate or harmful intent, our bar is WAY too low.

We have all internalized homophobia within us. It sucks so much. I feel like that is why it took me so long to realize I am queer. I didn't have a word or understanding for what I felt. I was attracted to men so I was straight. Period. Boy howdy was I wrong for so many years.

To minimize August's actions as only political is harmful. It perpetuates the dichotomy of only bad people being homophobic and good people aren't. This is a huge problem with anti-racism work too. Good people can't be racist. UGH.

Ya'll, August had a lot of awful motivations. And a lot of big giant emotions too. And the actions he took with them? Violent homophobia.

Of course if Wille was with a girl and August shared that video it would have been a violent act. The act is sexually violent no matter who is in the video. But we can't erase Wilhelm or Simon's queer identities from the situation, can we? No, we can't, and I won't. Just like we can't erase the classism and racism present in August's actions as well (these are very clear and overt throughout the series).

I want to keep my bar high when it comes to dismantling systems of oppression and abuse. I will start with myself; holding myself to high expectations. Opening my heart to learning and changing. And I want to hold that bar high for others too.

I hope this rambling makes sense. As always if you got this far, thanks for sticking with another long ass post.

Love,

Squig.