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kagecreep · 3 months ago

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Bloodlust Dreams (RoninxMC)

(KillerChat) Description: You meet Ronin in the alleyway. Kiss or kill? Why not both? (Spoilers for Ronin ending in KC)

Notes: Kiss or Kill is the final option? no. kiss AND kill. we're both going to hell hand in unloveable hand stuck in each others guts CW: extreme gore ig? and YES i know its completely unrealistic for them to survive this let me have my fantasy some dialogue in the beginning was taken from the game cuz obviously. extremely gorey i guess. not the worst but its, um, yeah. my shame bared with gnashing teeth <3

WC: 1.9k (Parts 1 & 2)

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Your skin was splitting at the seams, red hot angered blood, cells dividing and cracking open. Pinned immobile against the dirty wall, many times cleaned of splattered blood splashed with knives and boots and bullets.

"I told you, baby. I'm your little wish fulfillment. I'm what you dream of. Isn't this a story for the ages?" He grinned. "Come on –– tell me what you want! Do you hate me, do you love me? Are you gonna kill me? Or are you kissing me, darling? How much do you feel?"

There was, of course, a reason behind your desire to write about a killer. A hidden longing, founded in the beauty of tearing flesh, sinew and organs, palettes of vein blue and bile green and iron red. Being of somewhat sane mind kept you from ever enacting such things in real life––instead you dreamt of it, slept neck deep in peeled muscles and seeping blood. You wrote about it deliriously. Desirously.

You didn't know if Ronin realized that; if he knew his game was not corruption but an allowance––permission––for you to give in to what was already there. You supposed the darkness was inside everyone, lurking, that howling beast mourning its captivity, shrieking when its head reared to the light.

Your mouth arrived at his mouth, like destruction, like deliverance, like a dream. He was laughing mad, like you're his plaything, like you're his darling, like he expected no less from you.

That laughter filled up and infected your thoughts, your muscles. You yanked the knife out from beneath your jacket where it lay concealed, pressing the shivering metal against his chest. But it delighted him––his laughter howled in the alley, barking up the brick walls. Cackling over the stains of pooled blood.

"This is what you want, isn't it?" You hissed, biting at his lips, clawing at his jacket. The pins and zipper, the scissors, ripped at your fingers. "You want me elbow deep in your guts."

"Oh, darling," he seethed through gritted teeth, "only if you'll let me warm my cold little fingers in your aorta."

His hand gripped your hair, digging in and pulling, ripping, tearing. Sanity and skin. You kissed, tearing into his heat, desperate to overwhelm him. But standing above you, towering above, he kept you immobile. The wall of his body gave no mercy. You tried to move him, to pin him instead, to set him helplessly against your will, but his weight pressing in rendered you the prey. Heavier he leaned in, digging your knife into him willfully with his weight. You sucked in a gasp.

"C'mon, don't tell me it was all for show," he said between kisses, dark eyes watching how your attention flitted between the knife and his lips. "You pulled out the knife. Use it."

You kissed harder, pulling at his lips and tongue with your teeth, and in a blinding madness jerked the blade across his abdomen. Wet heat seeped from the wound, dripping through his black shirt and onto you. You moaned at the sensation and shared that hot breath with him, whispering into his mouth. The knife clattered out of your shaking hands.

"Am I pretty now?" You asked, squeezing the blood-soaked shirt and smearing the excess over his face.

His eyes rolled back into his head, a long moan singing from his heart. Darting from his lips, his tongue snaked out, licking the iron taste from your fingers. It curled around your bone, his piercing catching on your knuckle.

"My turn," he whispered with his devilish grin.

Fingers. Claws. Puncturing in, digging in, always consuming in liquid desire to sink within your flesh, inside, inside, inside. His fingers were inside you. He had ripped the protective layer, peeled everything back, and dug his skeleton into yours. He took your breath away. Lucifer and his pale, beating eyes.

"You offered me your heart," he murmured, lips brushing against yours in a moment of sudden gentleness. "I'm just taking what's mine, darlin'."

You laughed. Your lungs sung, collapsing, wheezing as he pushed in deeper. His grin grew wicked, tight and sharp, cackling as your vision went hazy.

But you were not yet lost.

You pulled him in, claws over his neck, and bit into the soft flesh–-the junction between his throat and bare shoulder. The hot skin gave way and fresh blood spurted from where your teeth punctured, your wide jaws lapping up every pouring rivulet. In your ear a full moan rang from his vocal cords, vibrating in your canines and incisors. You released, letting the blood flow, and kissed open-mouth up to his lips, where you latched onto life once more.

Foreign skin in your belly, grappling your intestine. Squeezing. You lost the ability to scream. When his grip loosened, your shivering, sweating hand clawed its way down his chest, tore his shirt, and plunged into the heat of his open wound.

You found yourself staring into the gates of Heaven. Hands warm and sticky, grasping, inundated in Ronin's life-force. Shining, blinding light, like the sun beating down, cool rivers at your feet.

"You think that you corrupt," you whispered, bells ringing in your ears and vision blinded by the ethereal light. "No. You release. Set free. You liberated me, Ronin. You're my divine messenger."

A hitch in his breath, and he withdrew from your guts. Your vision returned from that bleaching light, and you watched his lips tremble, his eyes go wide as his pupil's shrunk.

"My angel of rot," you moaned, pressing the words into his skin through your kisses. "You gonna let me bleed all over you?" You asked, worming up through his stomach, under his lungs and finally, over his heart. "Archangel?"

You squeezed. ~+~

Sex bathed in blood. Well, you weren't sure if it was sex. Neither of you once touched the other's genitals, but you were arm deep in his organs. He was elbow-deep in yours. Maybe it was some sick, divine intervention that allowed you to live beyond that critical moment when he grasped your beating heart. You knew it shouldn't have happened. You shouldn't be standing. And even so, even living past that moment, you shouldn't have followed Ronin home like a ragged dog on a leash.

His room was darker than you realized when you had all those video calls. Through shaded windows, painted lamps, and coloured fairy lights, Ronin doused his room a deep red that bled from the walls and ceiling, pooling on the floor. Everywhere tapes and old vinyls piling up on shelves and tables––the scent of iron mingling with a thick perfume. Despite the visual and olfactory stimulation, your mind could not be torn from a single thought.

He had been gentle with you.

He ripped you open with nails, tore your flesh apart, and his blood was still crusted beneath his fingernails––but his movements within you, sinuous and lithe, warped around your intestines and organs and left no mark. He cradled each organ like an infant's head, weak and fragile, ready to break by his crushing hand.

You had not been so careful. Your actions very nearly gave him a heart attack, but here he was, sitting between your splayed legs, wiping up the last of the blood crusted on your stomach and chest. His eyes remained on his work for the most part, but occasionally drifted up to watch your heavy expression with a smirk. That spark of pride in his eye never left him.

The scar you gave him was even––almost perpendicular to the thick scars just beneath his chest, a pale pink against his white skin. It cut cleanly and sewed cleanly, with little trace of your wretched intrusion. But you––five gnarled points, jagged tearing across your torso where he ripped and gnashed. Like a door forced open, the wood splintered across the floor. You stared at him, absent of the light, and wondered if he realized you would never heal from this. You would never look the same. His at least had the chance to heal, become something pale and fragile. Yours would forever be a tender wound––a rounded, broken halo of Ronin's claws.

He was staring at you now. His ministrations on your stomach had ceased, and all his attention was on your distrait gaze.

"What?" You asked flatly.

"Jus' wondering what's going on in that pretty little head of yours," he said.

At the side of the bed, strewn across the floor, piles of bloodied tissues and cut string occupied the edges of your mind.

"Thinking about what we did," you said, and this time your voice lost its' strength; quiet and diminutive.

"Feeling regret already?" He pouted. "Here I was feeling proud of you."

"Not exactly," you said, looking up to meet his gaze. "I... hm."

Your eyes fell back down to your lap; his knees touching your inner thighs, his hands on your hips, your hands––quiet and diminutive.

"Guess I'm... wondering what you want with me now," you mumbled.

"What I want with you?" He repeated, laughing. "Darlin', I'm not nearly done with you! What makes you think that was the end? I took you to my home, didn't I? Tenderly nursed your wounds like the lovers do? Isn't that what you wanted?"

Your brows knitted, furrowed together.

"I wanted your blood on my hands."

"And you got it," he murmured, leaning in. "Doesn't that satiate you at all?"

His breath against your lips again. Coasting across, gentle––gentle as his hands wrapping around your lungs. Desire coiled up in your throat, blocking your air.

"No," you whispered.

Tears blooming in the corners of your eyes blurred your vision, but even through that haze you watched how his grin widened, sharpened, and cut into your sanity.

"You want more?" He rasped, lips brushing against yours with every vowel. "You want another kiss from my blade, baby? Jesus, you're insatiable. Hope you don't forget to feed me, too." He paused, eyes flickering to your lips, and murmured. "Think I might be as insatiable as you."

"You want my blood in a jar?" You asked quietly.

"I want your head in a jar, sever your spinal column n' keep it as an ornament, pretty little white bones hanging like bells," he said, his voice singing in the quiet room.

His hands roamed up and under your neck, grasping your jaw. He dug in, nails into your skin, and pulled you down, forcing you to stare him in the eye. You steeled yourself and met his demand.

"What do you want... darlin'?"

"I want everything," you said through gritted teeth.

"Patience is key. Thought, bein' a writer and all, you'd know lots about it," he said.

"Sometimes," you said, scanning his eyes. "Sometimes the words flow like a raging torrent and your fingers flick across the keys so fast you can barely hear the individual tapping. Though... yeah... sometimes you sit staring at a blank screen for hours... just waiting for something to come."

"Glad to know you have experience. Y'know, you need patience to be a killer––need to be able to hold in that blazing fire till juuust the right moment. Guess I'll have to train you up a bit," he pressed into your wound, "'n whip you into shape."

You groaned, tensing at the pain flooding from your wound.

"Does it involve real whips?" You asked, your grin spreading.

"You wish," he said.

Razor grins––spread like cut cheeks, bleeding, dripping. A beautiful, bloody ending. You wrapped him up in your arms and squeezed, breathing in his scent, taking in each of his wandering hands slipping over your body.

#killer chat ronin #ronin beaufort #killer chat

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malbontesvicky · 1 month ago

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"Question - Answer" with the screenwriter of the novel "Astrea’s Broken Heart" - Elena H.

Good day, dear friends! We all know that December 31 is a magical time when you need to give gifts to your loved ones. Therefore, we have prepared a New Year's surprise for you, namely 31 answers to Elena's exciting questions. Enjoy reading🎀

1) How do you feel? Do you have a New Year's mood, and how do you plan to celebrate the New Year?

Just yesterday I was horrified that there was nothing left until the new year. I have no idea how to celebrate it. At least, I'll meet my family)

2) The finale of the second season is getting closer, and with it the finale of the novel... how do you feel?

To be honest, time flies so fast that you just don't have time to think about your feelings... The other day I passed the final chapter and it's hard for me to believe that Astra has only one season left...

3) How do you like working with Alice as the lead screenwriter of your story?

It's still great if you're about my feelings)

4) Knowing about your friendship with Alexandra SNR - does she help you write some scenes in Astra? How did your friendship come about in general?

We met Sasha when we started working on our stories at the Romance Club. I think, first of all, we have found support in each other and still find it.

Answering your second question: no, we don't help each other to write chapters) Each author does his own job)

5) If you had the opportunity to revive one character from the novel, who would it be and why?

I would revive Malek and see what will come out of it)

6) In the last interview you wrote that you have not decided on your line in Astraya... Have you chosen a favorite at the moment?

I'm afraid I still can't decide. But taking into account the fact that I should love my characters equally, I think it's for the best)

7) I would like to know how the idea of creating Astra in the Secret of Heaven universe came about? Was it your original idea or not?

Yes, of course, it was the original idea)

Astrea was created as standard, like all the stories of the romance club. First, the concept was agreed, then the disdoc and the first chapter. And then everything went too fast))

8) In what period of time do the events of Astrea take place? To "The Secret of Heaven 2" or something in between? And also what kind of place is this.. maybe modern England?

This is England, that's right) In general, there are a lot of clues in history about this. It wasn't a secret, but I still wonder how you guessed)

Alas, I can't answer your first question) But don't worry, you'll answer it yourself very soon)

9) Was the path of balance planned in history? After all, recently players have the opportunity to make a choice and get both "Skepticism" and "Faith" for it.

There is no way of balance and there will not be. This choice is just an answer.

10) How soon is it planned to close the love lines in the novel?

It's pretty soon. They won't close in the January update yet, you can still look closely. But now everything is at your own risk!)

11) And at the same time, how soon is the first sex in history planned?

Very soon!) Guess with whom?)

12) Have you thought about the possible extension of the novel to four seasons?

No, there were no such thoughts.

13) How old is Audrey?

She's about thirty.

14) What about the surname of Audrey and other characters? Or is it related to the plot? After all, so far we only know Malek's last name.

The characters' surnames have nothing to do with the plot, so there is no particular sense in their disclosure.

15) Can Audrey depend on the beast in the future? Is there an option that he will manage it?

You can find the answer to this question in the story when you go through it to the end)

16) Is a child? Or has Felonia already given us a full answer to this question?

And you can find the answer to this question in the story.

17) Do Audrey's thoughts when talking to Malek "sex without obligations?" mean that you shouldn't expect anything more with him?

As you wish. How the relationship with Malek will develop depends only on you.

18) How far are we from Fel showing us her wings?

We are close)

19) In this update, we learned that Felonia has a sister and brothers, will flashbacks from their childhood be shown? And also what kind of child is the child in the family according to Felonia?

Felonia is the oldest child. She has one sister and three brothers.

We will learn about her past in the third season.

20) How did you develop the character of Somnus and Fury? What key points inspired you to create them?

Describing Somnus, I imagined a snake. I wanted to make it dangerous and unpleasant for most people. But at the same time, to arouse sympathy from those who like snakes) I really like this character, although snakes rather scare me)

For Fury says his name) He should have become grumpy, just fury. And you definitely need to try to make him laugh - his smile is charming)

21) Can we hear any composition from Rafael? As, for example, it was with Walter's singing in "Soulless".

Unfortunately, they don't have to it yet (

22) Who was Astreia's past ally, because of whom Cassiel feels guilty and why does he feel guilty? Will it be further revealed in the plot?

Partially, the answer to this question was already in the plot. But then it will be revealed in more detail.

23) Mikael had to tell Malek about the activities of "Astrea" in exchange for help with the search for the sign of the Beast. Will it be possible to find out what exactly he told?

It's not that important. Mikael wouldn't tell really serious information)

24) Will it be possible to learn about the past of the Astrians (before their final decision to stay on earth) in colors, as were the moments of Audrey's childhood? If so, will it be available by branches or will it be available by friendship?

It's still difficult to say how exactly it will be (by branches or not), but we will definitely find out about the heroes' past.

25) How did the traumatic experience from childhood affect the main character on her adult life and her attitude to her sexuality (taking into account the constant feeling of guilt for the lack of her own ideality and integrity, which Audrey shared with Malek in the last episode of the story)?

Restrictions and imposed values have definitely imprinted on it. Her first sexual experience was accompanied by guilt, disgust, shame. For a long time it was difficult for her to accept her body, her desires. And with such attitudes it was impossible to enjoy the "forbidden fruit". Her experiments were a protest, and he didn't bring her any joy.

But the chosen profession and therapy helped her cope with it. She was able to separate her thoughts from the thoughts imposed by her father. She left his beliefs and grew new ones, only her own. But still it took a lot of time and effort.

26) In "The Secret of Heaven 2" Lilu tells about a certain Michael. Was it about our archangel or is it another character?

It's a different character, but the coincidence is funny)

27) Regarding the 72 votes in David's head - if not a spoiler, are these still the same 72 demons of Goetia called by King Solomon? How much can they influence David and did he act with their help in the sectarian village (on a sectarian village)?

I can say that he did not resort to their help in the village. We'll find out about them.

28) Will we learn more about childhood and Father David? What did his father do that he is now sitting in a cage?

Yes, of course. We'll find out for sure)

29) Can we come in and see the other guys' bedrooms? Except Rafael. It seems that it would reveal the characters even more.

I would really like that)) I hope we'll make it in time)

30) Who is the prototype of Raphael you were talking about in the end?

At the stage of writing the disdoc, thinking about Raphael, I imagined the Macedonian from the book "The House in Which", but the more I described him, the further he moved away from the prototype. Nevertheless, some of their features still have the same)

31) And finally: how do you think the Astreans would celebrate the New Year? It would be interesting to read briefly:)

I think if our Astrians didn't have so much to do, they could try to celebrate the New Year...

Michael will have a house party. He will set a chic table, ask Cassiel to help him with the decor.

Knowing the boss, David will not count on any fun, so he will entertain himself: with strong whiskey, good music and a selection of chic paired outfits for himself and Audrey.

Cassiel will escape from the holiday to the garden at some point and spend the rest of the night at the statue.

Rafael will watch with a smile David's attempts to move Michael, and at the end of the evening he will play the piano for everyone.

Felonia will go home quite early, as this holiday will remind her of her family and she will be in the mood to have fun.

#astrea’s broken heart #rc astrea’s broken heart #rc abh #rc mikael #rc cassiel #rc david #rc raphael #rc felonia #romance club

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a-not-so-clean-blog · 11 months ago

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Kakashi x book store reader

2250 words

♦️mentions smut but nothing actually happens

“Hey Kakashi, how was your last mission?” You rest your head in your palm as you lean against the counter. The bookshop was empty except for the white haired avid reader who would always stop in between missions to get some new reading material.

“Uneventful. It was mostly traveling so I was able to finish the last book you recommended.” He bashfully scratched his cheek as he avoided eye contact. “Did any more icha icha books come out yet?.”

“Not yet, but rumor has it he's supposed to be releasing another one soon. When I get one in you'll be the first to know.” You push off the counter and grab a small paper bag from the shelf behind you. Sliding the bag over to Kakashi, he looks interested but doesn't say anything. “In the meantime I think you'll like this book.”

He opened the bag and inspected the small book carefully. There was no description on the back and the cover simply had the title ‘wayward travelers’ printed on the front. Looking inside there wasn't even an ‘about the author’ blurb. “Hmmm? Well this certainly looks mysterious.”

“It's by a new author who hasn't even decided on a pen name yet, but the story itself is pretty good. Try it out and if you don't like it I'll do a full refund.” You say nonchalantly.

“No need for the trouble. You've given good recommendations before and I'm sure this one will be fine too.” You smile as he puts some coins on the counter and heads towards the door. “I'm heading out for my next mission but I'll let you know about the book when I get back.”

You wave as he leaves but once he's out of sight you clutch your chest as soon as the door bell rings shut. Heart thundering like a war drum you struggle to calm your nerves. You gave him the book and you kept a solid poker face while you did it. Everything will be fine, it'll be fine…it has to be. Now all that's left to do is calm your racing anxieties and wait for him to come back.

The next week was worse than torture. Thoughts constantly drifting back to Kakashi and the fear of how he would react to the book. It's far from the first time you have given him smut, actually that's mostly what he reads, but what would he think if he found out you wrote it?! You tried to shake the thought from your head but it kept creeping back into your skull. No, you're sure he didn't see your nervousness when you gave it to him, there's no way he can find out.

Not being able to take the book back was the biggest issue. Would he be able to tell that you were the one who wrote it? What if the writing was bad? What if the kinks you put in he doesn't like! Insecurities clawed at the back of your mind like a beast digging at a cage.

Suddenly, you're dragged out of your thoughts from the bell chiming above the door.

Putting on your best customer service smile you turn and greet whoever came in. “Welcome to the book stop, let me know if you have any questions.” an older woman thanked you and made her way to the back of the store. Before the thoughts of your book could return the bell rang again. You had to swallow the lump in your throat when you saw the handsome silver haired shinobi approaching the counter. “W-welcome back. How was the mission?” You mentally kick yourself for the stutter, but grateful for the recovery.

“It was easy. Honestly it could have been handled by a chunin, I don't know why they sent a full jounin team.” He slips the book from his pocket and dangles it in front of you. “Gave me a good opportunity to read the book though.” You could hear the smile in his voice.

“Ah, well… what did you think of it?” You tried so hard to maintain a casual air but you struggled to look him in the eye.

“It was pretty good, some scenes could have been worded better, but for a new author I'd say it's good. I definitely enjoyed it.” Something flashed in his eye. The same look a cat might give to a mouse. It made your heart race just a little faster. Your mouth went a little dry and thankfully Kakashi took your silence as a sign to continue. “You know a lot of authors tend to put a bit of themselves into their characters.” He opened the book and started thumbing through the pages. “Makes me curious about the love interest in this book…”

“Oh really?” You had to fight to keep your voice steady. “What about them?”

Even without looking at him you can feel his dark eye sizing you up. “Not much about their personality, but the way they talk is familiar.” he let out a low hum. “It made me think about who the author took inspiration from.”

Kakashi goes into a full analysis about the character's personalities and how that relates to the author's own personality and experience. The more he talked the more sweaty your palms became. You feared if he leaned over the counter than he'd be able to hear your heart beating rapidly in your chest, pounding at your ribs and making it hard to breathe. Despite everything you still did a good job of keeping a cool demeanor. At least you thought you did.

You were only granted a moment of relief from kakashi's author analysis when the old woman who came in before approached the counter to buy a recipe book. He politely stood off to the side watching you work as you put the woman's book in a bag and sent her on her way with a smile and a wave.

When you turn your attention back to Kakashi you can see his cheeks are raised and you can only imagine the Cheshire smile that he has stretched across his lips. How many hours have you fantasized about what they actually look like?

“Y’know as a Shinobi I don't just read books, in fact I'm quite skilled at reading people too. It's always so easy to tell when someone's keeping a secret from me~” His cool relaxed voice turned into something more melodic and teasing. He returns to leaning against the counter, ever so slightly closing the distance between you two.

“And what exactly do you think I'm keeping from you?” You say with an even and cautious tone.

“The author.”

A chill ran up your spine the moment you heard his words. “And why would you think that I'm the author?” the words fell out of your mouth a little more exasperated than you wanted.

“I never said you were.” Your face went pale as you realized you gave yourself away, and in the stupidest way possible.

“Well I'm not.” You try to sound dignified but the slight wave in your voice makes it obvious to him and yourself that you're lying, and doing a poor job at it.

Kakashi lets out a slight chuckle. “It really was a good book. Honestly if I didn't spend so much time talking to you I don't think I would have picked up on the nuances. You write like how you talk, almost like you are telling the story yourself.” He leans over the counter and tilts his head. A look that any under any other circumstances would have been cute but now only makes you feel more vulnerable.

It was getting harder to maintain eye contact with how flustered you'd become. “Okay you figured out it was me. You can go let me die of embarrassment in peace now.” You tried to save what little dignity you felt you had left and buried your face in your hands.

You begrudgingly moved your hands when you heard his siren call of a laugh. “Next time you want to write smut about a ‘hot rogue shinobi’ how about you name him Sukea.”

“Oh, so now you want to write my characters?” you can't help but laugh a little as you return some of his playfulness. Exasperation pushed your embarrassment to the back of your mind temporarily.

“Not at all” He lifts his hands in mock surrender. “I just think if I'm going to be the inspiration then I should give you something to work with. Don't you think~” again that look flashes in his eye. Something predatory and mischievous at the same time. A single look that's enough to send goosebumps across your skin.

“What did you have in mind?” Again under his gaze your confidence wavered. He didn't seem to mind though as he started walking around the counter, slowly creeping up on you.

“hmmm~ How about a weary shinobi returns from his long, hard mission… finally back in the comfort of his village he finds the one person he's had his eye on for years but still hasn't said anything to them. Nothing romantic at least.” Slowly he keeps moving forward until he's practically on top of you. One more step and you step back, your back pressed against the wall. “Eventually, our hero works up the courage to ask his favorite shop keep to go to a public hot spring with him. Somewhere he can relax after his mission.” Your bodies are now pressed against each other. You can feel his body heat radiating off of him. You're actually close enough to see the smallest tint of pink dusting his cheeks right above his mask. “But of course we need a plot twist. The bath house is full so there's nothing else to do but get a private bath just for the two of them.” His hands made their way to your waist and slid back to barely ghost over your ass before going to rest just above your thighs. A light squeeze before his hands explore just a little more.

You are so caught up in the moment that you never realized how much faster your heartbeat was, how ragged your breathing had become, or how you simply stared at his eye, totally mesmerized by his words.

Your heart leaps into your throat as the doorbell chimed again. Quickly you turn to see who came in and two young boys noisily made their way to the comic section without giving you a second glance. Your head whips back to look at Kakashi only to see that he's gone.

In the blink of an eye Kakashi was back on the customer side of the counter and the book you wrote laid on the floor where he was just standing. Finally, without the presence of Kakashi's body heat against you, you became painfully aware of just how hot your face was. You were met with a masked shinobi giving you what you assume is a closed eye smile, and he looked just as cool and composed as he always did. Fuck, your heart was ready to bust out of your chest.

“How does that sound for inspiration?” His smooth voice brought you right back to the butterflies in your stomach. What you wouldn't give to go back in time and lock the door before anybody could come in and disturb you. “Maybe you'd like some real experience for reference?” His voice was a little less teasing then his expression showed. Perhaps this was actually a genuine question from him.

It took only a moment for you to find your voice again. “I close the shop at 7.”

Kakashi sat up a little straighter. “Great! I'll meet you outside at 7:30 then.”

“Sounds like a date?” the statement came out more like a question and you intended, but you were just glad that your voice didn't crack. Hope was not something you were used to, especially not in the romance department.

“It sure does~” Your chest suddenly felt lighter, a huge weight being lifted from your shoulders. He pushed himself off the counter and headed towards the door. “See ya later.”

Just as he reached for the doorknob he stopped in his tracks. “Oh, I don't like writing in books, but I left a few notes for the ‘author’. Take a look when you get a chance.” and with that he was gone. The door chimed behind him and you were left alone with your thoughts again.

Finally your body catches up with your brain. You bend down to pick up the book he left behind. Your book. The simple object that started this whole wonderful mess. Once opened your eyes widened on just how many little notes were wedged between the pages. Quotes transcribed with little faces next to them. His opinions on different scenes that you wrote, things he thought were cute or funny. Once again he managed to make your face go bright red when you got halfway through the notes and he described in glorious detail exactly how the sex scenes made him feel. Some of the notes you could tell the penmanship was shaky. A small detail that gave you a bit of a deeper glimpse into how he was feeling. A small detail that made your heart race a little faster.

Perhaps your favorite note that he left was the one that simply said ‘I would love to try this with you, if you'd let me.’.

#a degenerate writes #hatake kakashi #kakashi x reader #x reader #naruto x reader #gn reader

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ihavethedreamies · 11 months ago

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Expert | Easy to Expert (3 v7) [NSFW]

Lee Yongbok (Felix) & Bang Chan - Stray Kids

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~4.5k

Felix/AFAB!Reader/Bang Chan

Genre: Reader-Insert, Smut, Fluff, Fluffy Smut

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Swearing, Kissing, Lingerie, Pet Names (Love, Pumpkin, Baby Girl, etc.), Multiple Partners, Oral (M! & F! Receiving), Sixty-Nine, Threesome, Double Penetration, Anal Play, Sex Toys - Butt Plugs, Anal Sex, Bang Chan has a Monster Cock (of course), Cockbulge (hmm), Unprotected Sex (Bad Idea, Don't Do It), Daddy Kink gets awakened, this is actually really soft and fluffy believe it or not, Bromance

Disclaimer: I do have the whole cock-bulge thing in this. I understand this could be a bit offensive to some who are on the heavier side (I am in that group as well). Sorry if this doesn't align with your body type, this is just a work of fiction.

Author's Note: This is the last one I am writing in this series, so let's see what absolute nonsense shows up here. I'm going to TRY and tone it down…

PS. I wrote the first not before I wrote the story, and this is after. This went a COMPLETELY different direction than I thought it would. Get ready for tooth rotting fluff AND smut.

PPS. Bang Chan is my bias and Felix my bias wrecker so that is why this one ended up like this…

-> Series Hub <-

-> Part 1 <-

-> Part 2 <-

-> Ver. I.N. <-

-> Ver. Seungmin <-

-> Ver. Hyunjin <-

-> Ver. Han <-

-> Ver. Lee Know <-

-> Ver. Changbin <-

Revised (1/30/25)

I am cross-posting this on Archive. Please reblog! Share, even if its to the other sites! Let me know if you want to be on the taglist!

"What?" Chan stops dead in his tracks, Felix continuing past him. He thinks for a second that he’s hearing things, or someone else's conversation. The younger man stops as well, turning back to his best friend.

"(Y/N) wants a threesome, you in?"

"Why are you asking me?" Chan sputters and Felix shrugs casually.

"She asked for you specifically so…"

"She asked for ME?"

"Yes?" Chan's head is swimming. He has to admit, ever since he found out a few months ago you couldn’t cum, he’s been looping in his head. It wasn’t romantic intentions behind him trying to figure out what he could do for you…Not at all. He’s been trying to convince himself he no longer has romantic feelings for you, especially since you started dating Felix. It’s obvious to the others, even Felix, but he appreciates that his hyung denies it even to himself.

"Are you sure?" The eldest of the group asks your boyfriend.

"I wouldn’t be asking you if I wasn’t. She picked you like a month and half ago; I've had time to think about it." Felix huffs, amused. Chan is getting flustered, and the younger man knows why.

"Are you thinking tonight?" They’re already on their way to your apartment for movie night.

"Well…yeah. We can move it though."

"You really think I can just sit and watch a movie with you two now?" Chan shakes his head, but continues walking. Felix falls into stride next to him and they continue to your place.

Felix messages you when they’re about fifteen minutes out, and you scramble off the couch to get ready. To say you’re excited is an understatement. But you’re also lowkey terrified. It’s not a hidden fact among the friend group what Chan is packing. You have even heard from other girls on campus. Not a traditional player by any means, but he’s been around the block. He’s an incredibly sweet gentleman, but a lot of girls just want to fuck him to say they’ve conquered the beast. That’s literally what they say. The thought makes you shiver as you prepare. Stepping out of the bathroom, you look yourself over in the mirror. Felix has gotten you a set of wolf cosplay lingerie, fitting for Chan. It’s more or less a bikini lined with gray fur. The silicone plugs he got you a month ago now has a grey furry tail attached; the texture tickles the backs of your thighs. A matching headband with grey ears sits on your head, it’s a little too big though, so you hope it stays on. Furry cuffs surround your ankles and wrists as well. The bottoms of the set is more like shorts than panties, but there’s a hole cut out of the crotch which gives access to your cunt as well as let the tail plug sitting in your ass. You shake your arms to get rid of some of the nerves. Though, they just come back two-fold when you hear your boyfriend, and his friend arrive. Your shaking increases as you pad to stand at the foot of your bed, waiting for them to remove their coats and shoes and meet you in the bedroom.

"Goes on, bro." Felix tells Chan, his accented English hitting your ears. Are they going to speak like that the whole night? Fuck yeah.

"Oh, baby girl!" Chan is floored as he enters your room. You look so fucking cute, his heart thumps hard, and he feels his pulse in his cock too. The pet-name does stuff to your insides, and you nervously wiggle, the tail wagging a bit from the momentum. To be honest, before you and Felix hooked up, you were tempted to go to Chan. With his reputation, you’re sure he could have managed, but you in no way regret that it’s Felix. Your boyfriend follows him in and comes to admire you as well. You turn toward him as he settles only a foot away from you.

"Good job, love." He praises and you both turn back to Chan. He’s still gaping, and you’re still too nervous to look him over completely. He just has grey sweatpants on and a black sweatshirt. You desperately want him to take it off so you can get a better look at him. You have seen his perfect body many times, but you want to touch it. Your fingers fidget with themselves, the black painting nails at the ends catching Chan's eye.

"Rules?" You prompt Felix and he looks at you, back to his friend then shakes his head.

"Just tell him no if you want." he tells you and you blink, then again. Seriously? He’ll let his friend kiss you? Fuck your holes and fill you with his cum? That’s four of the rules out the window. Plus, if he isn’t going to lead Chan through this, then the final one is trashed as well. The thought makes your core clench as you finally look back to the other Australian.

"Goes on." Felix assures you and you take a hesitant step forward, then trot over to Chan who is still looking at you in awe. His hair is brushed up and back some, framing his forehead. You’d have been fine just looking over every detail of his handsome face, but you need even more. Your small hands go to the zipper of his hoodie, and he lets you pull it down. He huffs at your pout when you see he has a t-shirt on underneath.

"It's below freezing out there, baby girl." He tells you, amused by your reaction. You mumble something incoherent, and he laughs. The sound pierces you, makes you let out a small whimper, pushing his sweatshirt off. He continues to watch, amused, casting a glance at Felix who looks just as entertained by you. You take a deep breath, sneaking your hands under his shirt and mewling as your warm fingertips brushes over the ridges of his abs. With his assistance, you remove the shirt completely and Felix sees your thighs clench. While he isn’t thrilled by how turned on you are already, he isn’t too surprised either. You’re honest with him and admitted you almost went to the eldest for assistance before you and Felix got together. He appreciated your honesty, and therefore trusts you. Doesn’t mean his pride isn’t a little hurt.

"Oh, my god." You gasp out, your touch tickling Chan some. He laughs, his gorgeous smile distracting you for a second.

"Can I kiss her, 'Lix?" Chan asks politely and you lean in some more.

"Yeah, I guess." Your boyfriend allows and you let him kiss you. He’s rough, more so than you expected. Chan knows better, he’s there to fuck you, not make love to you. He’ll leave the sensual kisses to Felix. He tilts his head, his hand going to the back of yours and he slides his tongue in your mouth. You cry out at the feeling. He’s good. Too good. You pull back a trail of saliva connecting your mouths.

"D-don't do that again." You mutter, your face red. He nods, humming in agreement. Felix snorts playfully. His trust is well placed. Not wanting to step over the line, Chan stays mostly still as you sink to your knees before him. Seeing him shirtless in the grey sweatpants is already sinfully attractive, you wonder what he’ll be like fully naked. An adonis carved out of marble for sure. There’s already a bulge from his hardening cock, but it’s mostly hidden by the thick material. He laughs at your eagerness as you hastily pull the waist band away. Your eyes widen as he steps out of his pants. He’s nowhere near being fully hard, but his black briefs are already straining.

"Fuck." You wheeze. You’re salivating like the wolf you’re dressed as. You fiddle with the tag on the black choker you have on, Felix's name engraved into it. As long as you only fall for Chan's cock, it’s fine. You turn to look back at your boyfriend anyway and he gives you a reassuring smile. He’s looped over every possible scenario in his head over the last month, knowing to almost a T at that point what will make you react in what way. So far, no surprises. Even though to some you haven't been dating long, you spent as much time together as possible, so he knows you well. You have been friends for years before then too.

"C-Can you…" You drift off, wanting to get a good view of Chan's briefs coming off. He smiles and does as you wordlessly requests. He feels a little sheepish under your gaze, honestly, as you ogle him. Adonis indeed. You literally watch his cock harden further under your appreciating gaze. You lick your lips, desperate to wrap them around him. Felix ended up not speaking the rule you have first decides on, but you’re a bit worried about what it’ll do to you to let Chan cum down your throat.

"Can we do something?" Chan suggests snapping you out of your daze. He also looks at Felix.

"Sixty-nine?" He finishes the request and Felix stiffens a bit. Knowing Chan, he might be able to make you cum from that and your boyfriend isn’t sure if he’s okay with that. The eldest is definitely the expert of the group and mastered the art of sex like the instruments he can play. But, when he looks into your big, pleading eyes, he can’t say no. With a slow nod you hop to your feet giddily and Chan chuckles, following you to the bed. He nods for you to climb over him once he’s on his back. Straddling his face, he wraps the tail around his hand just to hold it out of the way. The panties give him perfect access, the fur ticking his cheeks a bit though.

"Sit on me, baby girl." He urges and you lower your hips. You aren’t expecting the immediate pleasure you get from his tongue. He immediately swirling it around your clit, sucking hard. You gasp, falling forward, finding the head of his now fully hard cock in front of you. Once again, your eyes meet Felix’s, and he nods. Eagerly, you wrap your hand around Chan's cock, your fingers not even able to touch. You wrap your eager lips around the head, your jaw protesting some at the stretch. Chan rumbles under you; his strong arms surrounded your thighs to holds you where he wants you. Your moan vibrated through his dick as you get as much as him as you can in your mouth. It’ll be too dangerous for you to let him into your throat, you have to center yourself by finding Felix again. He loves that you keep thinking of him throughout. It’s also more arousing than he thinks it’ll be, seeing your mouth full of his best friend's fat cock. Chan eats you like a man starved and your boyfriend can see the characteristic twitch in your hips that means you’re close. You’re more shocked than Felix that the other man is getting you to the edge so fast. His hand twisted in the tail again, tugging it slightly, and takes your clit between his teeth, rolling it and you fall forward as you cum, swallowing his cock deeper. Chan grins as your cunt drips on his tongue and he lets the tail go, letting your orgasm ride out. When you come down, you pull him out of your mouth, panting for breath.

"Okay, baby girl." Chan eases you to roll off of him, you land on your back, still breathing harshly. Tears prick your eyes, and Felix instantly comes to your side, petting your head softly, shushing you. You look at him, so pitifully, ready to cry.

"Hey, shh, love." His heart breaks seeing you like that and Chan gets up on his knees next to you. He can tell you’re crying from emotions, not physical feelings, but he still feels bad. At the same time, he’s extremely proud of himself for making you cum like that. He’s satisfied the goal he set in the past, not ever thinking to dust it off and complete it. Chan's heart thuds again, this time in sorrow. You’re too precious.

"I'm sorry, Felix." Your breath hitches and he leans down to kiss your forehead, petting your hair. Instantly he feels bad for feeling jealous.

"Love, (Y/N), its fine. I'm not mad." He chuckles a bit to reassure you.

"Really?"

"Yes, sweet. I just want you to feel good, okay?" He hums and you nod, sniffling. Chan finally sees the relationship dynamic you two really have. It’s a dominant and submissive one, but Felix plays the role so softly. And you’re so cute with it, not a hint of being a brat.

"You want to keep going, baby girl?" Chan makes sure and you nod shyly. He smiles warmly and helps you sit up, removing the loose headband so you can stop fiddling with it.

"Can I take all this off her?" Chan asks and Felix nods. You sit there likes a good girl as Chan gently undoes and removes everything from you but the black choker. He even takes the tail off the plug, leaving the silicone toy inside you. The other man also takes the tie from your hair, letting it fall over your shoulders. The way he looks at you actually warmed Felix's heart. He also knows if you asked him, he’d be open to letting Chan in on your relationship. If it’s him…he can share you. That’s something to bring up later though. You shiver a bit, now a tad chilly and Felix smiles, climbing on the bed to hugs you from behind.

"Good girl." He soothes and helps Chan maneuver you to sit on his lap, back to him. Felix places a soft kiss to your lips, and you whine at the feeling of Chan's cock wedged in the cleft of your ass. Felix has decided not to turn the vibrations on, planning it as a surprise. The encounter turns out to be softer than he originally thought it would be.

"What're you thinking, 'Lix?" Chan knows him too well, and can see the gears turning. His eyes meet the eldest's and you look up at him too. His eyes cast to yours. It isn’t a secret that you had a huge crush on Chan about a year ago, but you never pursued it. Little do you know, Chan had liked you too, for a while. He didn’t even piece together, that's what it was at first, but Felix knew. Even when Chan would deny it to himself, Felix knows. Felix can still sense your love for himself, but he also sees how you look at his best friend.

"You want him too?" Felix asks and you don’t understands the question at first. Isn’t that why he’s there? The other man figures it out immediately though.

"Felix-"

"I'm not stupid, hyung." He huffs playfully and his true meaning registers.

"Felix?" you ask him, implying your question in your tone. Are you sure?

"We can discuss it after, but don't feel guilty." Your boyfriend kisses you softly on your cheek under your eye.

"Want him here?" Felix continues, helping you settle on Chan's lap, stroking his fingers through your soaked folds. You nod softly, letting the man behind you hold you in his arms. You feel so secure, even more so with Felix there too.

"Think you can make her cum again?" Felix challenged and the other man smirks.

"Let's see." He nuzzles behind your ear, one of his hands sliding down your stomach till his fingers hits your clit. You whimper as he swirls over it, then slides both fingers home. You sigh as his fingers fill you. They’re thicker and longer than Felix's, but just as talented it seems. His palm rubs hard over your clit as he scissored the digits in you, the pad of one finding the rough spot on your back wall. You twitch when he rubs over it and Felix watches the gears turn in Chan's head. His fingers left your core, rubbing back up to your clit, and he exposed the little nub further. He’s an expert, Felix decides. He learned your reactions instantly, knowing just what to do next. Chan then fucks three fingers into you, harshly presses against your further exposed clit with his palm. His fingers crook hard and up, his palm swirling your clit and you shiver hard, head tossed back to land on his shoulder. You’re close. Once again removing his fingers, he takes your button between two fingers, pinches hard and pulls your nub, and Felix watches your cunt spasm as you cum. The slight bit of jealousy he still feels dissipates when he sees the way Chan looks at you. He nuzzles your temple with his nose as you tremble, kissing the crest of your ear. As you shudder, coming down again, your head rolls so you can look at him.

"Fill her up, hyung." Felix allows, smiling as your eyes widen.

"'Lix~" You reach out for him, Chan still loosely hugging you to him. The eldest smiles fondly as Felix comes to you, the smile on the other’s face is so warm. Chan can tell how much you two love each other, and he’s honored you both are willing to let him wiggle his way in. When he’s within reach, your hands stroke over your boyfriend's pretty freckle covered cheekbones.

"Let’s have Channie fuck you, hm?" He coos, the words racier than his tone implied. You whine with a nod and Chan chuckles softly at your cuteness. You both are so cute.

"Okay, baby girl. Tell me if it’s too much." The man behind you speaks into your ear, his arms holding you closer, his right hand coming to cup your left breast. You never gets much sensation there, but you do flinch a bit when he pinched your nipple. Chan loosens his hold, moving his hands to rest at your hips, and Felix's move to your waist. You let them move you around likes you’re a ragdoll till you’re kneeling, cunt hovering over Chan's cock.

"Good girl." Felix praises, kissing the corner of your mouth as they both leads you to sink on the eldest's dick. The feeling knocks the air out of you, he’s so fucking big. You can’t help but ponder how much bigger he could be if was taller. He whispers soothing words in your ear, Felix kissing over your collarbone. You breathe, using the same technique as when your boyfriend fucks into your ass. Chan groans, your cunt is so hot and tight, and he can feel your slick gummy walls perfectly. It makes you all the more addictive. He can also feel the bump of the plug in your ass through the walls of your cunt. When Chan feels your cervix kiss the head of his cock, he halts your descent, a good inch or two left.

"M-more." You press and Chan rubs circles over your lower stomach. He smirks, he can feel the bulge of his cock already, and you mewl when he presses down.

"You sure, baby girl?" Chan's voice has gotten huskier somehow, deeper, rumbling through you. Felix smirks and lowers his voice himself, bringing his mouth to your other ear. What your boyfriend planned on saying next will probably earn him a playful smack later, but he’s so eager to see your unfiltered reaction. Your eyes are already blank, nothing but cock on the brain.

"Tell daddy how you want his cock." Felix orders you and Chan gasps as your cunt squeezes him hard. He huffs, thinking he misheard what Felix whispered to you at first.

"Want daddy deeper~" You whimper and the men both groan at your plea.

"Yeah?" Felix teases you further.

"Yes, sir~" You plead to him instead and he smiles. You’re too fucking cute. There’s a very specific reason Felix prefers you call him sir during sex, and that reason is splitting you open on his cock. At first, he didn’t want to use 'daddy' because he was jealous, thinking it might make you think of Chan. Especially since you jokingly call the eldest that all the time. But now…everything’s worked out perfectly.

"Okay, pumpkin." Your boyfriend's pet name for you changes and the new word makes your core pulse around the other's dick. Chan knows that you both went full into roleplay mode at that.

"Daddy~" You whine, and he laughs, acquiescing. You yelp when his hips shifts under him better, letting him thrusts up hard, burying his cock all the way in you. Words escaped you, only a string of babbles left you. Felix smiles and shuffles down the bed more. Chan watches, curious, and almost protested as the other man moves. He just let Felix do whatever though. Your legs are spread to sling over Chan's, holding them open. Felix's hands comes to your inner thighs, spreading you further and he marveled at your folds straining to takes Chan's massive cock. Your entire body jerked when he flicks his tongue at your swollen clit, his tongue lightly brushing over the other's dick. The man's arms tightens a bit around you as you slump into him further, and with one more flick of Felix's tongue, you fall apart again. At this point, your cunt is burning from the overstimulation, but your boyfriend knows if you get over the crest of pain, you can just keep on going. After your spasms goes away, he sits back to just watch again, nodding to Chan.

"Ready, baby girl? Want daddy to fuck ya good?" His hand comes to rest under your jaw, putting just enough pressure for you to feel it but not restricting your airway.

"Please!" You mewl, head lolling back and forth. His other hand is still on your stomach, and Felix puts his hands on your hips to help, lifting you slightly and pressing you back down as Chan fucks up. You gasp, your cunt stung from the friction, but the pain is so good as the man behind you rails you. It’s a good thing Felix is okay with Chan joining, you thought later, because you don’t think you could live never taking him again. You’re definitely a size queen and Felix marvels at you taking his friend like a champ.

"Ah, fuck, (Y/N)~" Chan is getting close, and he looks to your boyfriend, asking permission. Felix looks at your fucked out expression.

"Cum in her." he tells Chan, and he gets as deep as he can and lets go. Your stinging core piques, the pain burning into pleasure, and you aren’t sure if Chan filling you with his sticky cum is what put you over or Felix's voice.

"Oh, good girl~ Fuck!" The man moans himself as he feels his cum overflow from your cunt and drip down past his balls and onto the bedding. Felix is still rock hard, not having comes or been touched at all that night, but he’s fine dealing with himself in the shower if you’re too tired.

"Felix!" You reach for him again and he comes back to you.

"What do you need, pumpkin?"

"You…" You pout and he smiles brightly.

"I don’t think your cute little cunt can handle more." He coos and Chan huffs playfully. He’s still hard and really don’t wants to pull out anyway.

"Let’s turn her around." He suggests to the younger man. You cry out a bit when they move you around. When your chest meets Chan's, he sinks back into you, the new position and angle let him sink deeper. You shiver, falling into him and he laughs.

"You're so cute." He praises. He’s content to let you warm his cock, watching Felix scooch forward. His fingers wraps around the plug, and you breathed as if through muscle memory as he pulls it out. It clatters onto the floor from him tossing it. Can your body handle him filling your ass with Chan in your pussy? Guess you’ll all find out soon enough. Your breathing shifts when you feel Felix's cock at your pucker, he barely presses the tip in as he takes the lube Chan has reached for on the nightstand. Drizzling more onto himself, he starts to ease inside you. You shiver, your back hole welcoming the familiar intrusion.

"So good, pumpkin." Your boyfriend praises. To get in you best, he has to swing his leg over Chan’s, but he don’t mind. Chan helps him adjust you some and they both let you adjust to being completely full. Each breath you press out carried a slight moan and your little noises brings grins to both of the men's faces. After witnessing everything, as well as your even-tighter-than-usual canal clenching his cock, Felix knows he won’t last long. Might be for the best anyway considering your physical and mental state. Your nails weekly dig into the skin of Chan's chest where you lay as Felix pumps his hips. His thrusts are short and deep, and your body rocking slightly brushes your sensitive clit against the skin of Chan's pelvis. A defined vein that leads down to his cock gives just enough of a differing pressure as you rock.

"Okay, love, I'll fill you good than you can take a bath. Daddy and I will take care of you tonight and tomorrow." Felix picks the pace of his thrusts up and Chan hisses some as your cunt clenches hard and your nails carve crescents into his skin.

"(Y/N), be a good girl for daddy and cum." Chan's words are all you need, and you come one more time, Felix spraying your insides white. From the tight clench and the wait, Chan is sensitive himself and you cumming makes him fall apart with you two. Even more jizz spurted out from where your body meets Chan's and more of the sticky goo leaked from where Felix is inside you. You’re a complete mess and Felix wouldn’t have it any other way. Your consciousnesses fades, your eyes slipping closed, and the two men praise you for doing such a good job for them. Deciding to just clean you up with a towel for now, Felix helps you rest on your side as you sleep, leaving the blanket off you, your skin still hot. Your boyfriend pets your hair as Chan takes a quick shower and then they switch places.

"Are you sure?" the eldest asks, stroking your hair softly when Felix sits on the bed behind you.

"You love her, right?"

"I-I…" Chan swallows hard.

"Hyung?"

"…yes."

"I didn’t want to admit it before, but she likes you a lot. I know though that she loves me too…I think she deserves the world, but why not throw the moon in along with it?" Felix means every word. He loves you so much that he wants you to be loves twice as much, if not more.

"Well, guess I should change my name to Moon, huh?" Chan huffs and Felix rolls his eyes at the horrible pun.

"Just promise me when you two get married that I can be the best man." The eldest continues and your boyfriend smiles down at you.

"Of course. Wouldn’t have anyone else."

-> Series Hub <-

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flymetosnarryland · 8 months ago

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My Snarry WIPs' list.

I would like to share something. My Snarry WIPs' list, yup. Why? I always felt weird writing about myself and stuff I do, but I'm processing changes and thought I can share not only art, lol.

How many project are you working on? I'll dive into couple of mine:

Date with a Star - a Post-War romantic comedy. Harry is in love with Severus, Severus secretly loves Harry. Both are too scared to say what they feel to not lose their friendship. A friend in need asks Harry for help and this is where the wild ride with dumb dating TV-show starts. Especially because Harry don't know that the same friend-in-need blackmailed Severus to get him into the same show too. This is actually a second Snarry fic I ever started to write, inspired by dating TV-show from 1992. I remember that when the idea for this one hit me, I was laughing for a good hour (that TV-show was absolutely ridiculous). And I still feel a pinch of positive embarrassment when think about what's going on there. In fact this story made me want to learn how to translate my wiritngs into English. It's half written and translated too. I really have to finish second part.

Infraction - my first monster fic. My baby. Crime (serial killer), slow burn, Muggle AU featuring Marauders and Death Eaters, political sheananigans and Severus' old flame. I have entire story written out from beginning to the end. What's more... with an ending that allows me to dive into second book (I'm excited lika a child) including the initial idea for it, ahh. Every time I think about Infraction, I feel butterflies in my stomach and a tear comes to my eye, damn. However, the entire project requires a huge amount of work. And a few modifications that I finally have to do to complete the first stage. It's not simple, though. I regret a bit that I released the cover, prologue and first chapter. I was prematurely carried away by the joy of creation, but that's okay. Going to fix it all in time.

In the Moonlight - working title. Something I planned to write for last year's Snarry AUctoberfest, but the beast got bigger, lol. Crime (kidnapping), Muggle AU - my great weakness and, most importantly, inspired by the movie Bodyguard (the one with Whitney Huston). Much like Infraction, this fic is fully planned and scripted. I can't believe I managed to do it. I wrote 1/4 of the whole thing and even have the lyrics of original song that Harry dedicates to Severus, although I don't know anything about music at all (an elephant stepped on my ear).

In between - a drawing series. Harry and Severus in a cute/fluff version. Post-War and happy life, because that's what they deserve!

First time - Drama/Romance, Muggle AU (gosh, yeah, again!). This is a project I want to do 50/50 as a fic/comic. A few works and dirty sketches have already landed here. I have a little dream of writing something that includes e-mails/text messages. In general, a romance that started online. Aren't Harry and Severus purfect for this? (Plus doing art in colour for this project was a test I wanted to start before 3B.)

3B - a Vampire fic, yessss. Can you believe that once I said, I'll never ever write or do anything connected to vampires? Hehe, now I'm in the middle of it, fully commited and over the moon. A bit dark/angsty story with a bonus: illustrations. Crime (more like, cri-me a river, lol; I mean, again? Yup xD), Post-War, a few intrigues, even a SnarryWedding o_0 gosh. That is another thing I said: "No, that's not going to happen." I guess, I fell on my head since now I do everything I promised to myself not to. But it's fun. And bloody, mhaha. I also created my own Vampire Villains and I kinda fell in love with them. Going to sneak into this fic a bit of blood magic mechanics that I created for my fantasy book, too. The picture at the top is one version of the cover sketches ɷ◡ɷ

Adrenaline - working title. Post-War/Drama/Romance and slow burn, a bit of Hogwarts, a bit of Quidditch and for a change Severus will have to show that he wants something more. I mean, I always writing/thinking about Harry chasing Severus. So here the dynamic will change a little. Can't wait for it! The idea for this one was accidentaly born last week and I can't stop it anymore. The inspiration comes from the cover art for Witch Weekly that I did, lol. I had no idea that at the stage of brainstorming, it would turn into another monster. It supposed to be a short story, but, apparently, I'm not good at short stories and it's time to come to terms with it xD I won't cry either because I like Harry and Severus pairing up in different ways/AU's, hehe. And most importantly - creating all these things, even if they don't fully see the world outside my drawer, still gives me great joy!

#personal #Snarry WIP list #writer thoughts #art projects

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sanctus-ingenium · 1 year ago

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I'd looove to hear a little about your worldbuilding process if you don't mind sharing. How do you go about it? I know you have shared in a few posts already but just wanna know moree. Also where did it all begin? What inspired you? (eating it all uppp!!!)

hi!! I know I wrote a big long thing like last year or the year before about the process to making a setting but I cannot be arsed to find it rn so here's some disconnected thoughts

Overall I don't really make Headworlds or Worldbuilding Projects the way a lot of people do (which is why u keep hearing me say 'setting' over and over) because mainly what I make are stories in the order of characters -> plot -> world. those three things have to serve one another in that order of importance, so the world itself bends to serve the narrative. for example, ultimately idgaf where the holy beasts' skeletons come from, that is not important because the beasts are basically just a big plot device to serve the story. i can make some post-hoc justifications for their existence (and i did) but at the end of the day it will not and does not matter how they work or where they come from. the world is full of mysteries that will never be solved because the characters are not in a position to solve them. aside from a single border conflict, the world outside the mezian empire is nebulous and unimportant.

I don't enjoy working in a world -> narrative order because what I want to produce isn't just a series of info posts or artpieces about a setting, but a closed and self-contained story which is the justification for the entire world's existence. Headworlds that are all world and no character don't interest me.

So basically in the process of worldbuilding, I have to serve the story. A while back I made a post about continental history around Inver, all these wars and occupations and schisms and so on. All of those exist solely to provide a particular political climate, justification for Aquitan's theocratic structure, and the spread of the southern church north into Inver. I already had the idea of this church, that it would be integral to the country as a main political faction, so now I have to figure out how it got there and the political ramifications of that. It's all worldbuilding for sure, but it's a support structure underneath the story about how that church eventually changes world history, because i wanted to write a story about a church lol.

I guess if I wanted to explain The Process for a world -> characters setting i'd just be giving you How To Write A Story 101 lol. But basically: I think of a concept which interests me (big mechs yay). Then I think of a conflict that might arise (where does the fuel come from? who controls that supply? what might that do to the concentration of power in this area?). Then I put a character in what I consider to be the most interesting position to observe the effects of this conflict (a knight, an enginesmith, an exile), and honestly the main plot generally writes itself after that. I extrapolate the hook from that.

In terms of characters, I try to avoid calling them 'ocs' because in my mind 'oc' tends to be a very static stand-alone thing. Like I couldn't make a useful ref sheet of my characters because they are all changed by the story. I couldn't say 'he has a carefree personality' because in a few chapters no he fucking won't. in the same way i struggle a LOT to talk about my Siren setting which as close to a specbio 'headworld' as i'm ever gonna get, because I am worldbuilding in vastly different time periods at once in a world which is always changing, i can't make a post about for example a map of Siren because that's just a map from one era, I'd need to make a dozen maps to show how things change, how time affects it all, etc.

Because nothing is ever static and everything is in flux, pretty much the only way I can handle a setting like this is, again, just to focus on a few small stories centered around a cast of characters separated by time (i have... 4 distinct stories in Siren. maybe more). this is actually a frustrating barrier to me sharing any information at all about this place lol i'm the struggler

Where did it all begin? When I was 11 I used to write stories in my copybooks in class. There has never been a time where I was not making stories and where my stories were not the only important thing at all to me, superseding literally everything else. I learned how to draw digitally in 2011 because I wanted to draw my characters.

What inspires me? Everything lol. I actually don't have time to Consume Media much, I struggle watching movies or tv and I mostly hate video games because I would much rather be productive and sitting and watching a screen feels like a waste of my time. but I like reading books because I can take them with me on my phone. I get ideas from all sources but mostly non-media sources, like obviously mythology but also my history with the church and my scientific education. Usually nonfictional sources interest me the most (i was going to write a whole story that was a post-apocalyptic plague plot based on canine transmissible venereal cancer haha and even to this day that's where "the Immortal Hound" title comes from, little easter egg in inver)

#sorry this is barely coherent

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jollmaster · 3 months ago

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Hi! I've only found your blog recently, but I absolutely love your rewrite! One thing I always found off about canon was how sinners basically go without punishment in LITERAL hell. Like sure there's the extermination, but like...no hellborn entities or the devil himself do anything, just let them run the place?

hello! that's wow, I'm happy you like my blog and different silly thoughts and ideas 🖤

(sorry I wrote many words, I thought a lot)

tbh I like the idea of Hell as partly concept that people continue create unbearable conditions themselves; but I have two issues in HH case

first, I don't feel that this is Hell, it looks like basic loud and sometimes dangerous american city where you can live, even not overcrowded; I saw how another studio made this concept with beast city much more better, it was Cyberpunk 2077 based on old game (this city is dirty, dangerous, this city literally eats you while you're still alive)

second, the sinners don't visibly suffer a lot from their own actions (and there is no punishment, as you said), and the narrative in HH itself don't show clearly the idea that people aren't ruined by higher powers or external circumstances, but by themselves: this is fundamental two-faced freedom of choice, as I think, and this could make story ambigious

I don't have problem with sinners having local self-governance somewhere, but again, this is Hell, and we don't see its influence over them: if you're introducing hellborns and demons into story, then let them influence, at least indirectly (sinners purely into the Pride ring don't help this situation much: it's not very clear why there's a sins at all, if everything can be written off as pride and connection with first sin of pride... I dunno if I speak clearly, but hope you're understand), + it looks strange that humans, literally migrants, are above some hellborns in the hierarchy, maybe it's just a deep social commentary, I don't know

and actually, in my rewrite I decided to keep the concept of so-called self-drowning, but at the same time to use the fact that they're in the other world, the world where they're lower than dogs: Sheol/Hell has a heavy influence on mortals, because they're not adapted to it at any way, it only aggravates mental and physical unhealthiness; sinner can overcome this only with great efforts, fully realize the consequences and pay for actions, and only after that they get a chance to wash off own dirt

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel au #hazbin hotel rewrite #hazbin hotel redesign #asileverse #hazbin hotel critical #hazbin hotel hell

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saintsenara · 7 months ago

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Hey!

My main takeaway from your unhinged ships series - which provides me with limitless entertainment btw so thank you for your service - is how intricate your knowledge of the HP series is!

I'm kind of in a weird limbo rn where I have a great love for this world and the series but JKR's behaviour in recent years has completely turned me off the whole thing. I've been too disheartened to engage with the canon material in any real sense for years, but your exploration of it is kind of rekindling my interest. Do you have any thoughts on this?

Also, is HP like your niche or do you possess an encyclopaedic knowledge on any other works of literature or pop culture phenomena? This is just pure curiosity on my end.

thank you very much for this anon! it's extremely sweet.

how to reconcile being a part of this fandom - and, especially, how to be in a corner of the fandom which places more emphasis on the text than others - with jkr's decision to become a bigot is a question i'm sure we've all spent a lot of time on, and it's one which is going to have an inherently subjective answer.

my personal view is that she'll never get another penny out of me - i'm persevering with my original copies of the books, judiciously sellotaped; i won't engage at all with the upcoming television adaptation; i've not seen the fantastic beasts films; i wouldn't go and see cursed child; i wouldn't play hogwarts legacy; i don't buy merch and so on - but that writing my little stories and yapping away on my little tumblr is fine, because it's an engagement with the series which, no matter how much it focuses on the text she wrote, is still mine rather than hers.

but - of course - there are entirely reasonable arguments against this position, in either direction. someone who does engage more with jkr's post-radicalisation output could justifiably say that - since i've written stories involving delphini, who only exists because of cursed child, the fact that i've never seen or read the play is irrelevant and my insistence that there's a meaningful distinction between enjoying the expanded world of the series and enjoying the expanded world of the series in a way jkr materially benefits from is performative nonsense. someone else could justifiably say that jkr benefits [directly and indirectly] from all fandom engagement, even if that fandom engagement is critical of her and even if it doesn't financially support her - the upcoming television adaptation, for example, wouldn't have been greenlit if hbo didn't think it would get an audience, and the continued vitality of the harry potter fandom undoubtedly contributed to their belief that it would.

neither of these arguments are wrong - although neither is objectively correct either. each of us has to form a subjective opinion, be ok with it, and be open to changing it as time passes.

and i do genuinely think that engaging with the text as a text - something else i bang on about all the time - is helpful when it comes to reconciling everything.

i know it sounds very pretentious [and i also suspect that many people think the series isn't "well-written" enough to justify such pretension...] to say that the fandom needs to get better at embracing a variety of methods of reading the text and understanding the author's relationship to it.

this isn't me saying that anyone who wants to get into fandom needs to be able to rattle of the names of literary theorists, or be able to give an answer to "the series is historiographic metafiction: discuss".

[although if anyone would like to try and argue in favour of that proposition... i'd shriek.]

what it is is me saying that the dominant way of reading the text in the fandom - which is to focus on the reader's emotional response [and, above all, the reader's emotional response in childhood] - can end up giving jkr quite a bit more authority in how we engage with the series than she deserves. it's why many of us might say that we feel she's "betrayed" or "taken something away from" us, for example - and it's why many of us might feel that she's forced us into approaching the series in ways which decentre the canon material.

and this is - obviously - a completely legitimate way of engaging and responding. but there's also a lot to be gained from thinking outside of our emotional responses about things like the genre conventions which govern the series, the tropes and archetypes it uses, its language and syntax, its existence as something standalone, the other works of literature which influence it, and the social and historical context in which it was written. treating the series as "just" some books reduces jkr's authority over our response to it - and while the argument that this doesn't mean anything in the real world, since all she's going to care about is that people are reading her stuff, is an inherently reasonable one, i do think it has real-world benefits to us in how we square the circle of enjoying the text.

more controversially, though, i think it's also worth thinking about the personal context in which the series was written.

for me, the author is dead based on whether or not i need her to be. i don't think that the only valid interpretation of a text is the author's intended one, and i don't think that the only valid interpretation of a text is one dependent on matching parts of the story onto the author's biography. but i do think it's important for readers to know both what jkr understands the text as saying and what has happened in her life that bleeds through into it [such as the way her difficult relationship with her father and her experience of her mother's terminal illness undeniably influences the series' prioritisation of sacrifical motherhood and certain coolness towards fathers]. this doesn't mean agreeing with - or even empathising with - her by any means, it's just another tool in our arsenal when it comes to thinking of the series as no more or less special than any other piece of literature, and jkr no more or less important to our interpretation of it than any other author.

and i think it's worth saying that she doesn't seem to be someone who's bothered when fans say that she doesn't understand her own text or that she's lost the right to speak about it or that the fandom has taken it back from her - which is also why when people say that non-canon shipping [especially of queer pairings] must piss her off i think it's just cope - because she can spin that as these people being childish and unwilling to face reality.

but she does seem to be bothered by people who say "yeah, i know that's what you think and i know that's what you intended... but i disagree and you don't have the right to dictate otherwise".

[this is why - i think - she gets so frothingly pissed-off by daniel radcliffe's immaculate stance against her anti-trans bigotry. he's always very firm in saying "she can think what she wants, but - firstly - this isn't about what she thinks privately, it's about what she does publicly and - secondly - i think she's completely wrong and i'm not going to change my mind just because she wants me to", and she obviously doesn't like the fact that this is much harder to spin into the narrative that she's being "oppressed" and "victimised" than she'd like...]

the text is just a text, and she's just one woman, but our ways of reading are infinite and important and ours. the new horizon in literary theory is "fuck her, we ball".

[when it comes to "do i have a good memory?" the answer is "yes, but for purely useless information". when the question is whether that good memory relates to other pieces of pop culture, i'm either very lucky or very unlucky - depending on where you stand on such things - that the fandoms for hit millennial sitcoms don't seem to be large... otherwise i'd clearly be spending all my time writing epic nick/schmidt or liz lemon/jenna maroney romances and/or being cancelled for being in george michael/maeby nation...]

#asks answered #fuck jkr we ball

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seri-tonin · 4 months ago

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BSD Chapter 119 Analysis

Bookmarks, dimensions, minkowski spaces... what the fuck does it all mean?? This chapter dumped a whole lot of information on us without really answering any of our questions, so this is my attempt to hopefully break some of it down for you and explain my theories on it.

Everything under the cut cause I wrote a whole ass essay

The Tiger is a Bookmark?

This chapter started off strong by giving us what's probably one of the more confusing concepts in the series (which is saying a lot...). Fyodor finally gave some hints as to the true nature of the tiger, but he did it in the most cryptic way possible.

I have a few theories in mind for what he could've meant by this. My immediate thought ties back to the fact that the tiger is considered to be a "guide" to the book. It's something we've known for awhile, but from the beginning we've assumed that that means it's a guide to finding the book itself. However, comparing the tiger to a bookmark - something that helps you know where you are in a book - makes me think that the tiger might be a guide in the sense that it can navigate between the different worlds that we know exist within the book, such as the Beast universe.

The second theory that I came up with is that maybe the tiger functions as some sort of anchor. A bookmark holds your place in a book, so the tiger "holds" the world and keeps it where it's at. (This is honestly the weakest theory of the three but I figured I'd include it anyways)

And my friend (shout-out to @musical-ghostie) came up with the third theory, that Fyodor's breaking the fourth wall right now. When he refers to the tiger as the bookmark, he could be talking about the fact that he's the protagonist, the one we experience the story through, or (similar to my first theory) the audience's guide to this world. This would also explain why Fyodor was so disgusted by the fact that it's Atsushi who has the tiger ability. Atsushi, who's selfish and pathetic and nothing like how you'd imagine a typical protagonist to be (this is not a diss at all on Atsushi's character by the way, I love the fact that he's written like this). I'm particularly attached to this interpretation, because it would fit so well with my "Asagiri is a character and god and the creator of the book" theory, but I'm not gonna get into that here (maybe it'll get it's own post sometime).

This theory is also backed up by this panel where Fyodor describes the tiger as the "emotional hearth" of the world, which would make sense if he was referring to the fact that Atsushi, as the protagonist, is the main aspect of the story that keeps the audience emotionally invested - because we're the most connected to his emotions specifically.

Ame-no-gozen and Minkowski Space

Shout-out to Bungou Stray Dogs for being the only series that I love enough that I'm willing to research an advanced physics concept just to be able to understand the story a bit better.

In this chapter, Fyodor gives us this explanation on how the divine being functions the way it does:

That's... pretty confusing, isn't it? So, I did a little bit of research into what a Minkowski space is, and here's my understanding: it's essentially a theoretical plane where time functions the same as space. Basically, the divine being is able to go wherever it wants in time, forward and backwards, instead of being stuck only ever going forward in time at the same consistent rate like the rest of us. (Disclaimer: I have never taken a physics class in my life, so my interpretation of what a Minkowski space is could be way off. Feel free to tell me in the notes if you know!!)

That said, I don't think the extent of ame-no-gozen's power is just being able to freely move through space and time, but I think it's also able to manipulate the (metaphorical) shape that space and time take. Fyodor even specifically refers to it as manipulating space in this panel:

He only refers to space in this panel, but I think it's safe to assume that the being has the same power over time, since it's able to interact with time in the same way that it interacts with space.

Parallels to Chapter 4

I'm sure we all recognized the reference to Akutagawa's iconic "Fear death. Fear slaughter" speech he gives when he's first introduced. This of course made me go back and reread chapter four, where he gives the original speech, and I noticed another parallel that I hadn't thought of immediately.

In chapter four, Akutagawa tells Atsushi in no uncertain terms that it is his fault that his colleagues, Junichiro and Naomi, are presumably dead. He explains to him that they were targeted because of the fact that Atsushi possesses the power of the tiger, and therefore he was the one who brought suffering to them.

Now some of what Fyodor said in the newest chapter is starting to sound really familiar... In this chapter, Fyodor tells Atsushi almost the exact same thing. That his friends are presumably dead and it's his fault, because he has the power of the tiger and could've prevented it.

I would be willing to chalk this up to just both being villains targeting Atsushi's insecurities and not really a parallel, if it weren't for the fact that chapter four gets much more explicitly referenced later in this chapter with the whole "fear death, fear slaughter" thing. Chapter four being referenced multiple times makes me believe it's intentional. I have a feeling that either Atsushi or Akutagawa (or both) will soon have a moment that really displays how much they've grown since their first meeting in chapter four, which is why it's being referenced now.

Other Thoughts + Conclusion

I'm sure if you're reading this, you were probably hoping I'd have something to say about Akutagawa's appearance, but honestly I can't say I have anything that hasn't been said by someone else already. Currently I'm leaning towards the theory that he's still under Bram's influence to some extent. Although, I also like the possibility that's been pointed out that maybe he does actually recognize Atsushi, but is just being dramatic and metaphorical and trying to tell him that he's not acting like the Atsushi he's come to know. I don't think this one is super likely, but it would be in-character for Akutagawa for sure.

Uhh but yeah, I think that's all the thoughts I have right now, but I'd love it if anyone wants to discuss some of this with me! Thank you so much for reading all this if you got this far, I hope it makes enough sense...

#spent like two whole hours writing this instead of working on midterms please read and reblog it ToT #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd 119 #bsd chapter 119 #analysis #seri speaks

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mist1e · 5 months ago

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HAARLEP PLAYLIST

Much like with my Ascended Astarion playlist, I created a playlist for Haarlep only this time I used Google Sheets table and a ranking system to help myself. It, too, tells a story and all the s̲o̲n̲g̲s̲ i̲n̲ i̲t̲ a̲r̲e̲ i̲n̲ c̲h̲r̲o̲n̲o̲l̲o̲g̲i̲c̲a̲l̲ o̲r̲d̲e̲r̲

This story is about Haarlep meeting Tav and how this very ordinary acquaintance turned into something utterly unexpected.

Link to playlist on YouTube at the end of the post.

And now that all the normal people are just listening to the playlist, the nerds can click ‘keep reading’ to dive into the detailed breakdown of the story...

The playlist consists of 5 parts, and for each part I wrote a small drabble to share the vibe with you.

PART 1: HAARLEP

«Shhh… Hush, sweetheart, no need to make such a fuss. I haven’t even sunk my teeth into you yet. But do not fret, I’m not some rabid beast. I won’t lunge at you or tear you apart. I’m just a simple incubus, albeit an outstanding one.

What are incubi? I’m glad you asked.

We are the wielders of the enchanted word. Lords of the human soul. Masters of the all-consuming lust.

We breathe in air and breathe out passion. Love flows through our veins, voluptuousness drips from our fingertips, and our gaze ignites desire.

Your most daring dreams are our law. The innuendo swirling on the tip of your tongue is our feast. Guessing your desires before you even know them is like a drug to us.

Oh, you want to know more? Come closer, sweetheart. I never promised not to bite, but trust me, you are going to love it.»

1. Don’t Stop Me Now

Literally can imagine him waking up to this song.

Yeah, I'm a rocket ship on my way to Mars On a collision course I am a satellite, I'm out of control I am a sex machine ready to reload Like an atom bomb about to Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, explode I'm burnin' through the sky, yeah 200 degrees that's why they call me Mister Fahrenheit I'm traveling at the speed of light I wanna make a supersonic woman of you

2. Aimed to Kill

You've been checkin' under your bed to see if I'm there When you look back up I'm under you pullin' your hair Getting lost inside my world, you don't know where I've been Oh no, oh no, I feel it comin' And I tried to save a life with these diamond hands of mine But they're sharper than a knife, I aimed to kill And I tried to fix a heart with these lips that left some scars "I swear I won't do no harm," shh, I aimed to kill

3. Who Made You a Monster?

You've got a twisted way Of making it all seem fine Tricking the world to trust you But everything that you say Is some kind of sordid lie Who taught you how to lie so well? Who made you a monster? Who made you a monster?

4. The Devil is a Gentleman

He don't always come at midnight Burnin' red and talking sin But he knows how to play it just right If you gonna let him in Sleek along and brings you roses He's always got the words to say Just enough so you don't notice That you ain't nothing but his prey

5. Pass The Knife

Thought you had control, I'll strip you till you're bones Scraping your knees till you beg for more Cover you in scars, just to leave a mark Get you addicted, then tear you apart Pass me the knife and I'll eat you alive Take my time, I'll do it how you like it Pass me the knife and I'll eat you alive Love skin deep, you're only here to make me high

6. Terrible Things

All of the things that I've done Terrible things you would never believe Things that I've done, oh, how you'll run If you knew a single word of all of the things that I've done

7. Liquid Smooth

I see this one as a tenderness and longing for a connection, that is hidden deep inside.

I'm beautiful, I know 'cause it's the season But what am I to do with all this beauty? Biology, I am an organism, I'm chemical That's all, that is all I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too And feel my skin is plump and full of life, I'm in my prime I'm liquid smooth, come touch me, too I'm at my highest peak, I'm ripe about to fall, capture me

8. Pure Imagination

The fantasy that he creates for the people whom he gets involved with.

Come with me and you'll be In a world of pure imagination Take a look and you'll see Into your imagination We'll begin with a spin Traveling in the world of my creation What we'll see will defy explanation

9. Mr. Sandman

He falls asleep, thinking to himself if there is a way to feel this longing that has been building inside him for quite some time during these lonely evenings in House of Hope, when all he did was waiting, wondering if Raphael would come to him or no. Next thing you know, Tav enters the boudoir...

Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream Make her the cutest that I've ever seen Give her two lips like roses and clover And tell her that her lonely nights are over Sandman, I'm so alone Don't have nobody to call my own Please turn on your magic beam Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream

PART 2: HAARLEP MEETS TAV

Haarlep leaned on the railing of the balcony and gazed thoughtfully into the distance. The grey ash-covered mountains drowned in a reddish haze. The ground beneath them was laced with a web of rifts, their bottomless depths blazing with lava flares. Dirty, colourless clouds drifted In the sky above the crooked-toothed mountain peaks. Avernus in all its ugliness.

His forked tongue lashed out of his mouth and wetted his parched lips. He drew in the air, heavy with dust that settled thickly in his lungs, and spat irritably over the balustrade.

He couldn’t resist tasting her, he just couldn’t. Damned girl.

Haarlep was used to being starved in the House of Hope. The howls of the damned souls and the flesh of devils were not sustaining in the slightest, and over the years, he just had to learn to control his hunger. There was certainly nothing good about it. Haarlep was weaker than he could be, it was harder for him to conjure magic, and sometimes in the mornings his veins painfully twisted into poisonous threads. It was the ache he could only relieve with exhausting, concentration-demanding meditation.

Haarlep's mind slipped into the vivid memories of yesterday.

Yesterday, he dreamed of his past life again… Feasts, masquerades, balls in the mortal world, where he could drink from four or five mortals in a course of a single evening, or even sneak around and drain a soul out of some petty wretch. And that last orgy at the Duke’s mansion? Haarlep closed his eyes and his nose tickled with the scent of the freshest rainbow caviar, which swam in the belly of a fish in the waters of Calimport the day before. His ears rang with the laughter of the young noblewomen, who used to lose their composure after the third glass of sparkling wine, pretending not to notice the lewd glances of the men smoking cigars in the half-dark corners of the room. And Haarlep… He was sitting in the centre of the hall on a golden throne — the Lord of that den of debauchery! — whilst the mortals were crawling on their knees, their faces drooping with lust, their hands reaching out to him as if he were their god… The memories ran through his body in a searing wave, and Haarlep involuntarily craned his neck, arching his back. Things had been different in his past life. The one he had before he fell to his knees in the presence of Mephistopheles.

Yesterday, when he opened his eyes and saw her in the Boudoir, Haarlep thought he was still dreaming. How could he have restrained himself? And was there any point in restraint?

Oh, how delicious she was… Her life essence flowed through his veins, blossoming with a long-forgotten arousal in his chest. Perhaps his starvation was to blame, but she tasted divine. Nothing like any other mortal he had had before. Purposeful, ambitious, a little naive, she opened herself to him like a soft book with a flowery spine and golden embossing, allowing him to drink in her deepest desires, fears, and dreams. And he did drink… At the moment of her climax, in the deep caverns of her soul, he tasted submission, desire to please, an urge to earn praise. Ah, if only he had a little more time! He would have guided her and under his tender yet insistent touch she would have unfurled like a beautiful flower in an overgrown garden. He would have nudged her to fall headfirst into the abyss of her darkest desires.

But he didn’t have enough time. It was all over in a flash. For some puzzling reason, she didn’t grab the Hammer and just slipped away unnoticed.

The faint scent of her arousal still lingered in the Boudoir, making Haarlep violently run his claws over his neck, crossing the impeccable skin with red brown marks. He had been hungry before, but now he was famished. All night after they’d met, he spent tossing and turning in bed, the silk sheets thrown to the floor, his fingers digging into the pillow.

Haarlep closed his eyes, which were stinging as if they were filled with sand, and rubbed the bridge of his nose nervously.

He must see her again.

He would sneak out of the House of Hope, follow the scent of her thoughts, and catch her again.

Consequences be damned.

10. Me and Mr Wolf

Hey little girl, you look so nice In the pretty red dress with those pretty black eyes Hello Mr. Wolf, oh what a surprise To find you here so deep in the night My dear little girl, what's the rush? How about supper, just the two of us? Oh Mr. Wolf, you want me to stay But I fear we'll regret it one day

11. Out Of Control — Haarlep

I watched her feet move, her hips they sway Does a hair flip then starts to say Oh my god, it's my favorite song I pull her close and she sings along We can't slow down even if we tried If the record keeps spinning so will I She likes disco and tastes like a tear Tells me don't stop dancing and she's pulling me near

12. Kill of the Night— Haarlep

The street's a liar I'm gonna lure you into the dark My cold desire To hear the boom, boom, boom of your heart I'm gonna catch ya I'm gonna get ya, get ya, oh, oh-oh I wanna taste the way that you bleed, oh You're my kill of the night

13. Terrible Thing — Tav

Oh for you, you terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Terrible thing, you Beautiful thing Mm, you beautiful thing A wreck, a wreck you make You leave, you leave me in your wake Oh honey, let me go Aha, aha, don't you let me go

14. Tongues and Teeth — Haarlep

I've grown a mouth so sharp and cruel It's all that I can give to you, my dear And when you come in quick to steal a kiss My teeth will only cut your lips, my dear And I know that you mean so well But I am not a vessel for your good intent I will only break your pretty things I will only wring you dry of everything But if you're fine with that You can be mine like that

15. Horns — Tav

She got blood cold as ice And a heart made of stone But she keeps me alive She's the beast in my bones She gets everything she wants When she gets me alone Like it's nothin' She got two little horns And they get me a little bit

16. if u think i'm pretty

If you think I'm pretty, lay your hands on me Know you can't stop thinkin' 'bout it I know that you're shitty and you're bad for me But I can't stop thinkin' 'bout it Said you needed love, but you're only here for sex, and And I'm dyin' to be next Killed me once before, I just come back more obsessed with you

17. When You Say My Name — Haarlep

And does it scare you That I already know what you're into? You can say lеss, I bet I can guess That you say whatevеr to get me undressed Double dare you, tell me two lies Don't need no truths 'Cause I can see right through you You're no good at pretend I’m using your tricks that you use with your friends I like the way your mouth moves The way you say my name

18. Dirty Thoughts — Tav

I get dirty thoughts about you They get worse when I'm without you Does that mean that I'm going to hell? Or are you thinking them as well? But when you hold me In the fantasy, it's so convincing I shouldn't think the things I'm thinking But now I've gone and let them sink in

19. Eat You — Haarlep

Cause you've been sticky with your tricky words And I would crumble like a humble bird Now you're so tender with an ear I can bend And tell you how I feel I go hungry every night But not this time around I'm gonna eat you, you're my desire I'm gonna sharpen all my teeth and build a fire I'm gonna eat you, cook and defeat you I'm gonna breathe you in my lungs and make you mine

20. Sugar Water — Tav

My boy’s got a sharp twist, no, he’s wicked in the heart Feeds me sugar water just to keep me alive Saw him in my dreams again He’s wiping down the fingerprints Press so hard I float up to the sky It’s kind of tripping me up, babе I’ve got it bad for you Laying back sipping sugar water I’m so weak for thе things you do

21. salvation — Haarlep

Sleep with me Worship me Pray like I’m your god Find the light in my voice Treat us like it’s blasphemy Pray we don’t get caught Let me be your only choice I’ll deny you of salvation I’ll be the reason you repent Kiss me like I’m a conviction Beg for divinity in my breath

22. Pretty In The Dark — Haarlep

I want All the power and the pain I’ll love you in the flames Just tell me that you're mine I’ll be your beautiful obsession Center of attention That’s just what I like Run through your veins Got your heart to keep Calling my name Get down on your knees

23. A Dangerous Thing — Tav

Something about you is soft like an angel And something inside you is violence and danger I knew from the moment we met, you are a dangerous thing When you are with me, I feel like I'm living And living besides you can be unforgiving I knew from the very first step, you are a dangerous thing

PART 3: WHEN THE GAME TURNED SERIOUS

“What do you dream of?”

Haarlep lazily opened his eyes at the soft caressing sound of her voice. Just like always after their little romps, he was in a state of blissful indulgence, like a cat who got the cream. Usually, he would wait out the indolent peak of his satiety and then disappear from her sight again, bestowing her with a dazzling smile and a graceful flick of his wrist as a kiss goodbye. But today, for some reason, he felt overwhelmingly lazy and reluctant to leave.

He glanced down at her little head, which rested perfectly in the dent under his collarbone. The look on her face was pensive, and her delicate features were slightly tinged with a subtle sadness of some sort.

“I dream of having a unicorn,” he muttered.

“Really?” she perked up, but her eyes narrowed upon seeing his snickering grin. She grudgingly elbowed Haarlep in the side, eliciting a little chuckle from him. “I’m asking you seriously.”

“Look at me, mouse. Are these eyes capable of telling untruths?” he batted his eyelashes innocently.

She sighed, but smiled with her lips only and didn’t ask further. The predawn silence enveloped them once more, as the morning light was just beginning to bloom in the sky. The first tinkling glints of sunlight seeped through the open windows, and a biting daybreak rolled down their shoulders with chill.

She shivered and snuggled closer to him. She smelled of sex, girlish sweat, floral honey, and something else he couldn’t quite put his finger on. He inhaled her scent deeply, and the corner of his lips tugged up in a slight smile against his will.

Haarlep was brimming with her life essence, and the barely perceptible magical connection still weaved between them, leaving the flavour of her thoughts on his lips. Her mind was emanating feelings and emotions that, to his incubus sense, were as tangible as her warm shoulder under his palm. He felt she wanted him to ask. But he didn’t ask.

No. He had no desire to ask.

“And what do you dream of, little mouse?” The words slipped from his lips involuntarily, clearly having a mind of their own.

“I want to go back to the Feywild someday. To see the place where I grew up again. To see the old oak grove, and the Falls of the Rejected Bride… To see where my parents are buried.”

Haarlep slid the tip of his tongue over his lips, feeling the bitter tang of her sadness in his mouth, and it made him feel unimaginably wistful.

“What a marvellous dream you have, my dear — to visit a graveyard of memories and bodies.” He snorted and let out a cynical hum. “You should dream of visiting the shores of Lake Esmel in Amn. The sun is warm on the skin, the men, and women have a true lust for life, and the wine there is absolutely fabulous…”

“Oh, that’s not what I meant at all,” she muttered quietly.

He sighed.

“I know, little mouse,” Haarlep murmured, pressing his lips to the top of her head, kissing her ashy hair. He closed his eyes and drew in her sadness with his nose. Damn, even her sadness tasted divine.

“Are you going soon?” she asked timidly. Her voice quivered with an unspoken hope.

Haarlep was silent. He took a deep breath again, deliberately intoxicating himself with her very nature.

“I’ll stay a little longer.”

24. FU In My Head — Tav

Take me closer, take my clothes off Oh I fantasize If I'm honest, it's more fun when you can't read my mind Sometimes I fuck you in my head I let you touch me when I'm lonely in my bed I wanna scream, but hold my breath The kinda thing that you would rather leave unsaid I got dirty wishes on my mind But you will never ever know that I I like to fuck you in my head You make me scream when there's nobody Just the thought of your body

25. Devil On My Shoulder — Tav

Every time I think I'm free, you're calling me Your love pulling me right back down Can't believe that I keep coming back But you make me feel so good I swore I'd never dance with you again Keep safe from the devil on my shoulder But you know me so well And you drag me to Hell I can't keep safe from the devil on my Keep safe from the devil on my shoulder

26. Maniac — Tav

You play girls like a man, but your eyes are like a child Your face is cool and calm, but your hair is wrecked and wild You hide behind your metaphors and pray that no one sees The fare behind your poker face: your dark and twisted needs Your fragile heart and your paper skin Such a beautiful boy filled with so much sin Your reflection is your very worst enemy Behind the glass is an angel, but the devil's beneath Let me in, wear me out Let me in, wear me out

27. You — Haarlep

What I would do to get into your head Crawl out my body into yours instead Swim through your veins all day and every fiber Raid your brain and all your desires If you only knew I would do anything For a taste of you I would do anything Just to see inside And no one else will do All that I want is to be you

28. the fruits — Tav

My love, are you the devil? I would worship you instead of him I have no time for confession For I'm too busy committing sins My love, you're something special I never met someone like you You made me fall from Heaven But I know just what I do But I don't I feel your hands grabbing my throat As you say

29. Rule #34 — Haarlep

I love that you shake When I ravage your skin It's so easy to bite with your hands pinned Shadows dancing on the sheets If you obey I might give you a treat Right now you're mine All mine Give in, you're mine All mine You look so good There on your knees Such a good girl, knows how to please Look at me, look me in the еyes Forget yourself Surrеnder your mind

30. Lovesick in Public — Tav

Last night you really got in my head How’d I get hung up on what you did When all you did was kiss my neck My cheek's red like a cherry Help me cause I am berry Lovesick in public I’m hooked on the way that you taste I know I’m headed for heartbreak

31. Good Looking — Tav

Play casino holes of my eyeballs Roll the dice on my thighs You stopped for breath and I sped up Just to impress you The skyline falls as I try to make sense of it all I thought I'd uncovered your secrets but, turns out, there's more You adored me before Oh, my good looking boy

32. You Put a Spell on Me — Haarlep

Before I hunt you down Grab your chin and kiss your lips You bring me back I lay you down and grab your hips And we lose all control And before you know it I put a spell on you Now you're mine I've got a hold on you, at least for the night

33. Keep It Down — Haarlep

You shoot me up through the clouds I’m a hero in your mouth I'm the sickness you found I'm the fever you're about While I throw you around You're gonna scream ... Shhh: girl keep it down The scars you leave on my back A painting of your attack You're biting down on my fist I know you cannot resist

34. Good Looking — Tav

Pressure on my lips I die for just one kiss Wake, I can't resist Could I be dreaming this? How do I fake it with another man? How do I love him on the weekend? How do I listen to another man? How do I get off on the weekend? You're in my heart, in my heart, in my head

35. So Damn Into You — Haarlep

Can I have you forever? Every single night It started with a bang Don’t know how you got me so messed up But baby I won’t ever get enough, oh 'Cause I’m so damn into you I’m so damn into you

36. From Persephone — Tav

No, I wasn't threatened Mother, I was not bound No, I wasn't carried Off on his three headed hound 'Cause I packed my own bag, found my own way Down into the underground See, mama, he may seem gruesome But he's even got a dog And don't you know that death is A very stable job? 'Cause I love my baby, tall, dark Hades Lord of death is down on his knees for me

37. Hearts a Mess — Tav

Pick apart the pieces of your heart And let me peer inside Let me in where only your thoughts have been Let me occupy your mind as you do mine You have lost too much love To fear, doubt and distrust, it's not enough You just threw away the key to your heart Don't get burned 'cause nothing gets through It makes it easier, easier on you That much more difficult for me To make you see

38. Closer — Haarlep

I wanna fuck you like an animal I wanna feel you from the inside I wanna fuck you like an animal My whole existence is flawed You get me closer to God You can have my isolation You can have the hate that it brings You can have my absence of faith You can have my everything

39. Choke — Tav

You are a shadow Following me where I go I'd be better without you What are you doing to me? I'm suffocating Don't know how to explain it But I feel like I'm fading What are you doing to me? Loosen your grip before I choke Can't catch my breath, I'm gonna choke I wish that you'd just let me go I don't want this, I promise, just leave me alone Loosen your grip beforе I-

40. she calls me daddy — Haarlep

It might be a little superficial She plays with the boys But she comes home to me Little fucked up but I think it's official ’Cause she might be your girl But she's calling me daddy She's mi-i-i-ine She wears a collar with my name Secretive but not ashamed She's mi-i-i-ine But I'd never tie her down They always come around now

41. The Masochism Tango — Tav

I ache for the touch of your lips, dear But much more for the touch of your whips, dear You can raise welts like nobody else As we dance to the Masochism Tango Let our love be a flame, not an ember Say it's me that you want to dismember Blacken my eye, set fire to my tie As we dance to the Masochism Tango

42. Wicked Game

The world was on fire, and no one could save me but you It's strange what desire will make foolish people do I never dreamed that I'd meet somebody like you And I never dreamed that I'd lose somebody like you What a wicked game to play To make me feel this way What a wicked thing to do To let me dream of you

PART 4: OBSESSION

“Say it! I want to hear you say it!” It was not a spoken word, but a rasping growl that erupted from his chest. He loomed over her, with his back rounded, and bristled, like a wild beast over its prey.

His fingers clenched harder on her throat.

She dug her small fingernails into his straining arm. Wet strands of her fringe clung to her forehead, covered in beads of sweat. Her eyebrows were raised piteously, her emerald eyes fixed on his face. She parted her plump cherry lips wide as she gulped in the rhythmic breaths of air.

“I am yours,” she replied hoarsely. “I am yours, Haarlep. Yours… Haarlep! Haarlep. Haarley…”

He growled again and thrust his hips into hers with abandon. She cried out, running her trembling fingers through his wavy black hair, pulling it gently. Her emotions exploded like fireworks in his mind, blurring in coloured circles under his closed eyelids. He pushed his hips against hers like a man possessed, drowning in her sweet surrender. She was under him, and she was everywhere, enveloping him like a raging torrent. Her fragility tingled along his spine, her sincerity squeezed his heart like a vice, her vulnerability stroked him with hundreds of gentle fingers, her trust filled his very being with a velvety warmth.

He couldn’t drink enough of her, couldn’t inhale her with his full lungs. He could barely restrain himself from devouring her whole without a shred left.

As always with her, the pulsing life essence flowed easily, like a chiming stream, she gave it to him willingly. Despite the intoxicating madness threatening to overwhelm him, he tried to take as little as possible so as not to hurt his little mouse in any way.

“You’re driving me mad,” he growled into her ear in a frenzy, his fingers on her neck tightening into a bruising grip.

“I want you to go mad! Lose your mind! Go insane! For me…”

His hips picked up a punishing rhythm

She shrieked and dug her nails into his shoulders, forcing him to arch his back. Clenched like a spring, she stiffened and quivered beneath him, out of breath. Her consciousness blazed like a bonfire on Midsummer Night, spilling her life essence. It crushed him like a storm wave, drowning him in rapture. With the last thrust, Haarlep froze and shuddered, feeling the physical bliss merge with the cascade of her emotions flashing in his mind.

He collapsed on top of her, pressing himself against her hot chest, nuzzling his nose into the crook of her neck. She wrapped her legs around his hips, unwilling to let him go, pulling him greedily against her body. Her hoarse and frequent breathing burned his temple.

“Yours… Yours… And you are mine. My Haarley…” she whispered, choking on euphoria, trembling with delight.

With a growl that shook his chest, he slipped his arms under her back, pulling her close, so tight that it was probably hard for her to breathe.

“What have you done to me, mouse?” he exhaled, his whisper tinted with a hint of desperation and confusion.

“I bewitched you. Enchanted you, spellbound you, charmed you, beguiled you. Now you’re not going anywhere.”

For a few moments, only their laboured breaths echoed in the silence of their secret sanctuary.

"I am not,” he agreed and captured her sweet lips in a tender kiss.

43. I Wanna Be Yours — Haarlep

Let me be your 'leccy meter An' I'll never run out Let me be the portable heater That you'll get cold without I wanna be your setting lotion (Wanna be) Hold your hair in deep devotion (How deep?) At least as deep as the Pacific Ocean I wanna be yours

44. The Cult Of Dionysus

I'm feeling devious You're looking glamorous Let's get mischievous And polyamorous Wine and women and wonderful vices Welcome to the cult of Dionysus Run, run, run away Just take my hand and we'll abandon this world We'll wash those tears away You're young and beautiful, and I'll love you always We got no time for pain When it's just you and me in ecstasy

45. Angel of Small Death & the Codeine Scene — Haarlep

I watch the work of my kin, bold and boyful Toying somewhere between love and abuse Calling to join them the wretched and joyful Shaking the wings of their terrible youths Freshly disowned in some frozen devotion No more alone or myself could I be Lurched like a stray to the arms that were open No shortage of sordid, no protest from me

46. Obsessed With You — Haarlep

Your smile sets my heart aflame Electrocute me with your eyes The very mention of your name My stomach fills with butterflies Your love is better than cocaine I need you more than oxygen I've got it bad again An O-B-S-E-S-S-I-O-N But I want to get next to you Yeah, I love all the things you do I want to get close to you You are my dream come true I want to have sex with you Your sweet caress won't do Cause I'm obsessed with you

47. Misery Meat — Tav

You want a taste of my brain? Okay, it's yours anyway A bite of my eye? Alright I won't put up a fight As you open up my ribs the blood flows out like a river You strip my bones away as you indulge in my liver And the more that I am in pain The more that you'll gain And to me, that seems like a pretty fair trade

48. High Enough — Haarlep

Do you see anyone other than me? Baby, please I'll take a hit of whatever you got, maybe two, maybe three Oh, you're phenomenal, feel like a domino, fall to my knees I am a malady, you are my galaxy, my sweet relief I used to like liquor to get me inspired But you look so beautiful, my new supplier I used to like smoking to stop all the thinking But I found a different buzz

49. Dear Alice (Rainy Days) — Haarlep

I'm losing my faith in you, my long-lost friend, Alice Roses have lost their colors And it's breaking my heart (Ah) You take my breath away And I don't know what to do And I don't know what to do Before you say your last word That makes me want To lay you down I'll kiss, I'll touch, I'll cut you into the pieces And you feel the same And you'll know my crave And you'll see that I'm The only one for you

50. I Am Your Skin — Haarlep

I wanna be your skin I wanna feel everything you feel I will be your covering And I will hide you inside of me With every breath in harmony I wanna be your skin I wanna be your covering

51. Desire — Haarlep

Baby, I wanna touch you I wanna breathe into your will See, I gotta hunt you I gotta bring you to my hell Baby, I wanna fuck you I wanna feel you in my bones Boy, I'm gonna love you I'm gonna tear into your soul

52. Obsessed — Tav

I wanna feel you in my arms Hold you hostage in my heart It’s true 'Cause I'm so obsessed with you Your every word, I pick apart Down to the punctuation marks All you do 'Cause I'm so obsessed with you Oh, with you

53. Spiracle — Haarlep

I want the parts of you You only show to the birds outside your bedroom window I want the teeth that you lost as a child That you hide in a box under your pillow I want your secrets, your clementine fields The ropes that you climb up, the parts that won't heal I want your safe word, your passive resistance The sickness you foster, your favorite addictions And I want your nightmares, the ghost in your doorway Your paralyzed sleeping, your- (Aaaah) I want you butterfly, I want you sailor I am your lover and I am your jailor

PART 5: VANILLA CREAM FLAVOUR

“All right. Take it off.”

Smirking, Haarlep pulled the silk blindfold off, and smiled at her ruddy face and eyes sparkling with mirth. He raised his gaze and looked ahead.

From the high hill where they sat, they could see Baldur’s Gate harbour buzz lazily beneath them. It was slowly preparing to shake off the last cargoes, sigh with its sleepy waves, and retire to rest for the day. The half sunk into the bay of the Chionthar River, casting a golden shimmering glow over its rippling surface. Haarlep lowered his eyes. Before him, on the blanket spread on the ground, she laid out small plates packed with all sorts of savoury delicacies. One was filled with green grapes and strawberries, the other with neatly arranged cheese and sausages, appetisingly glistening with fat. Nearby stood bowls of buns and sweet rolls of various kinds.

“Somehow this picnic looks suspiciously like a date,” he placed a finger on his chin with feigned thoughtfulness.

She shook her head.

“A date? What a silly thing to say. We’re going to unromantically stuff our faces with this unappetising food, that’s all there is to it,” she tossed a grape into the air. He caught it, and it burst in his mouth, spraying sweet juice on his tongue.

Haarlep sank to the grass and rested his head in her lap. She immediately ran her nimble fingers through his hair, stroking it absent-mindedly, as she was gazing out into the distance, at the orange sun setting in Chionthar.

They were silent. Haarlep had long ago realised that it was nice to be silent with her.

Wide over the water resounded the shouts of the workers, who wrapped up the unloading of the last fishing schooner. A loud crack of a wooden crate breaking reached their ears, accompanied by the selected swearing of the cargo handlers.

“You know, I’ve come to realise one rather curious thing,” Haarlep mused thoughtfully. “I know very little about mortals.”

“How so?” she snapped out of her reverie and, for a moment, stopped flicking through his hair and looked down at him. “You can reach into the most secret nooks and crannies of a person’s mind, find out things about them that even they themselves are unaware of.”

“Yes. Except I was looking for a very different thing.”

She continued to stroke him, running the silky strands of his hair through her fingers, as she studied him with an expectant gaze. Haarlep noticed how sweetly she always nibbled on her lower lip when she was curious, and smiled at his observation.

“I’ve always looked for the weaknesses, to see what buttons I can push to get what I need from a mortal, and I’ve always succeeded. I searched into their past. Their traumas, their fears, their most depraved sexual experiences and lusts. All other sides of humanity were always foreign to me. I considered them useless. But after glimpsing into your head, I changed my mind.”

She raised her arched eyebrows, and Haarlep’s mind responded to her emotion. Her sudden sky-blue surprise flashed before his inner gaze, her wonder glided tenderly over his arms like a soft caress. And amidst it all, there was something else — a subtle, salty undertone, tinged with pure, unadulterated hope.

Lately, she had been emitting life essence a little at a time almost constantly, and Haarlep didn’t even need to do anything to elicit it. He had never encountered something like this before. He had to resist the temptation to indulge his innate greed and delve into her. The trust she exhibited never ceased to amaze him.

“I became curious and looked a little deeper. I’ve seen your strength, tasted your fascination with the world, touched your thoughts about the future. And that’s just a small portion of you. There’s so much more...”

He grinned and shook his head slightly.

“I can’t believe it never occurred to me to do this before.” He fell silent halfway through the sentence, and sank deeper into his thoughts, but after a moment he smiled at her again and added, “I guess I just didn’t care. But with you, little mouse, everything is different. Perhaps you did bewitch me?”

“Of course I did. I have a witch’s eye.”

She leaned closer, rolling her eyes and made a funny face, eliciting a laugh from him. Oh, what a dummy.

Delighted that she had managed to humour him, she straightened up again.

“How does it feel to drink the life essence of a human?”

“Oh, it’s the most marvellous feeling.”

Haarlep sighed, and his gaze drifted towards the sky. The cirrus clouds scattered like weightless pinkish-orange silk threads across the deep blue canvas. Their weightlessness and ephemeral nature made him think they were about to dissolve right before his eyes, but they froze in the sky like translucent butterflies caught on a pin.

“Life essence differs from mortal to mortal,” he continued. “It contains their unique nature. In the moments of supreme physical delight, the mortal becomes vulnerable enough for an incubus to harvest it with ease. It’s like crushing a ripe peach in your hand and catching its sweet juice with your lips. The essence is coloured by human emotions and feelings, and each one we can taste, like a hint of flavour in a wine.”

She hummed thoughtfully and twisted a small strand of his hair around her index finger.

“It does sound marvellous.”

Haarlep shifted his gaze to her.

“Every emotion is not only a taste but also a colour, a smell, and sometimes even a sense of a touch. For instance, when I pin your wrists to the bed above your head, you quiver so sweetly… I feel a prickly shiver run down my spine, and you smell like the first snowdrop on an early Alturiak morning: meltwater, almonds, and a promise of warmth.”

She blushed, and an embarrassed smile flickered across her lips. Haarlep smiled back at her.

“It’s like I feel the world with your skin and through you. Your senses mingle with mine, your consciousness flows into mine, the reality bursts with new colours and expands like a star exploding.” He reached out and cupped her cheek, stroking it gently with his thumb. “I love looking at this world with you. I see things I never knew existed before.”

She closed her eyes for a moment, surrendering to his caressing touch.

There it was. Again. He felt it again.

“You know, there’s something quite mysterious about your life essence. No matter how many times I taste it, I can’t figure it out…” he frowned, and his hand fell limply to the grass along his body. “Every feeling and thought you have, they all have the same tinge, the same unknown flavour to me. Something very soft and sweet and enveloping, like… like…”

Haarlep fell silent, trying to find the words to describe this incredible sensation that made him want to squeeze his eyes shut. One that spreads with homely warmth through his body, rolls with tenderness across his tongue, drips from his fingertips akin to molasses.

“Like vanilla cream?” she suggested.

He fired a glare at her.

“Yes! Sounds about right…”

She blushed even more and turned her face to the setting sun again.

Of course, she knew what that vanilla-cream flavour of her feelings was.

And deep down, so did he.

54. Life Worth Living — Tav

Take what you need, darling I'm just here for you Ooh ooh ooh ooh (oh) Give me your love and Physical affection Ooh ooh ooh ooh Give me the worst of you to hold You to take me to the heavens Give me the best of all your grace You make life worth living

55. Love Like You — End Credits — Haarlep

If I could begin to be Half of what you think of me I could do about anything I could even learn how to love When I see the way you act Wondering when I'm coming back I could do about anything I could even learn how to love like you

56. Hardest of Hearts — Tav

There is love in your body but you can't hold it in It pours from your eyes and spills from your skin Tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts There is love in your body but you can't get it out It gets stuck in your head, won't come out of your mouth Sticks to your tongue and it shows on your face That the sweetest of words have the bitterest taste Darling heart, I loved you from the start But you'll never know what a fool I've been

57. I Might As Well Die With You — Haarlep

Oh baby When I see your face Too beautiful for this place Don't let the vice and the bad deals Let it go to waste Over and over and over again Oh baby Spiraling out of control God save me Falling in love at the end of world Just take me now What’s the use? I Might as well die with you

58. Souls on Fire — Tav

Do you feel the burn between our hearts Souls on fire A strange desire Have you given in To this ancient ritual I don’t know how long we’ve been apart But we’re the same old souls playing different parts Same old souls playing different parts Picking up the broken pieces of our hearts

59. She — Haarlep

This is the song that started this playlist and it happened so that it ends it. A huge heartfelt thank you to @mina-astarvara for sharing it with me in the first place.

She may be the face I can’t forget A trace of pleasure or regret May be my treasure or the prize I have to pay She may be the reason I survive The why and wherefore I’m alive The one I’ll care for through the rough And ready years Me, I’ll take her laughter and her tears I’ll make them all my souvenirs Oh, where she goes I’ve got to be The meaning of my life is she

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