#i don't know whether i will do another chart but i will update these at the end of the year for sure 😎💖

[xariarte]

men's basketball rpf fics on ao3 over the past decade

extra notes/analysis:

2015 was very inactive in the tag... 💔

sudden drop during the pandemic...not sure what made writers stop writing since everyone was at home but alas

2022 was when the Golden State Warriors were doing really well...and it was the most active year in the tag ever ✨

wondering whether 2024 will surpass 2022...we're halfway through the year so it's possible 🤔

[solarwynd]

I actually wish armys would try to get that 1 billion plaque for every member instead of just yapping about it as a subconscious desire to level things with Jimin.

Because I wanna see them try to balance five songs to take them to 1 billion, take fake love to 1 billion (because remember that's a thing), still stream SNTY (for end of year awards guys), and prioritise new releases (none of y'all deserve Tae or rap line 🥺). End of the day all they'll end up doing is removing those 2 LC streams from their 8 hour playlists.

Also real talk this happens for Jimin not because all of the armys who are suddenly inspired about 1 billion streams are explicitly Jimin antis. No it's because even if they don't hate Jimin, in their minds he's not that great. He's a part of BTS and they like his personality but other than that they have no respect for him as a performer. They'll always tune in for his songs, watch his performances, focus on the songs where he's got the most lines but it never clicks in their mind that that keeps happening because he's a superior artist or because he's better. So when Jimin achieves anything, they all decide that if Jimin can do it, it must not be that difficult. If we can do it for Jimin, then of course we can do it for Tae and hyung line and god forbid it doesn't happen, they start throwing a pity party. I'm getting more annoyed as I speak on it.

“They'll always tune in for his songs, watch his performances, focus on the songs where he's got the most lines but it never clicks in their mind that that keeps happening because he's a superior artist or because he's better.”

.🤷🏾‍♀️

“So when Jimin achieves anything, they all decide that if Jimin can do it, it must not be that difficult. If we can do it for Jimin, then of course we can do it for Tae and hyung line and god forbid it doesn't happen, they start throwing a pity party.”

You have to question whether they think this is because they know they’re not supporting Jimin (despite him only having them apparently 🥴) whereas the other members get their *full* backing. Or because they really think that lowly of him despite his obvious popularity. Probably a combination of both.

Realistically, only TH will probably be getting that 1B plaque. Hyung Line isn’t getting one. It’s just the truth. An army posted the year that they’d achieve it in and some of them are in nearly the next decade unless they get at-least quadruple the stream rate they’re getting now. Armys have picked up and dropped multiple songs towards that 1B goal so many times. Either because of their pissing contest with blinks or them wanting somebody else to get a record over Jimin. Every Spotify update, Neuron is dropping by the double digits and the rest of hyung line stays on that chart max 2 weeks. As soon as JK announces another single, this “all 7 to 1B” project will be forgotten and they’ll go right back to making him the center of everything again because they don’t care about HL fr. They exist purely as a foil to Jimin also standing out in any capacity for armys.

[anemicjellyfish]

I've had this headcanon post in my draft section since just before Apology Tour came out. I'll leave it as-is, and post a follow up at the bottom:

I headcanon that that prior to the breakup, Veroskia wasn't quite at "Pop Star" status, but was like a rising artist type situation. She then wrote a sick ass breakup song about Blitzø and that it topped the Hell Charts for months, skyrocketing her to fame.

BUT I think it's funnier if most people don't know the song is about Blitzø; the lyrics just allude to some guy being a clown and breaking her heart. Maybe she kept her tattoo of his name covered idk

And I imagine it's like a Taylor Swift scenario where her most dedicated fans dig through her life history and figure out that her #1 song is about the imp who runs a business murdering humans, but outside the Verosika fandom this isn't common knowledge

Yeah I just think it would be funny. Be nice please it's my first ever headcanon post.

Now for my updated headcanon, post Apology Tour.

Virtually the same as above. Strike out the "nobody knowing it's Blitzø." I'm choosing to think it's an open secret in the Verosika fandom, like Fizz and Ozzie. Everyone knows, but no one involved will confirm.

And I'm adding in that every time the breakup song plays on the radio, Blitzø drives a little more erratically in anger, but won't tell Loona or M&M why (they don't know it's about him). Does this conflict with canon slightly? Yes. Do I care? No. You're on tumblr, no one this deep in my stupid ass text posts should care about canon enough to call me out on it lol.

(Also also I'm adding another: at least 1/4 of the people at Verosika's parties were people that tried a relationship with Blitzø specifically because Verosika dated him. Whether they were convinced they could fix/change him, trying to one-up Verosika, or they just wanted to imitate a famous person, who's to say lol)

[wumblr]

i haven't made a covid post for a while but there does seem to be another summer wave going on

hospitalizations, wastewater, and positive tests are fairly similar to past years' summer waves (but not as bad as 2022). deaths remain lower than any other point during the pandemic, and excess deaths have returned to pre-pandemic levels (deaths are delayed compared to other variables, so whether it continues this way seems... fairly important)

excess deaths are as always a heinously complicated thing. i might be underestimating dec 2022 (i'm still estimating based on WHO 20-21 data, total deaths being about 2x reported deaths, weighted to a slightly higher multiple in weeks with more deaths and a lower multiple in weeks with fewer deaths) -- but we do seem to be in the first 2 or 3 week period of negative excess deaths since, uh, the very first week of lockdowns (which, if you recall, may have prevented a small but noticeable number of other preventable deaths). this could be underreported and subject to later updates, but the margin is small and the updates don't usually change the numbers too much. you can't really underreport a severe spike, when that happens we start talking about refrigerated morgue storage trucks and mass graves

CDC's estimate of excess deaths. i'm also mixing CDC's reported deaths for the 2023 with johns hopkins data from prior years, because JH ceased reporting and i didn't want to rebuild a spreadsheet that was never terribly precise to begin with (it's intended to help me to chart uncharted waters, or gauge whether what they're saying in the news really matches the available data, which... mostly it does but you know there's a tendency to downplay it)

recent research shows that the original variant killed 3 of 4 types of brain cells (pericyte, endothelial, and microglia), while other variants killed fewer types of brain cells. that said, i don't want to downplay that all variants still have potentially deleterious effects on the brain. it does seem that newer variants are losing potency, but this is not necessarily a linear progression, as omicron killed two types of brain cells while alpha and beta only killed one type. this is, of course, in addition to microclotting, cytokine storms, and fused neurons, each of which have deleterious effects in the brain as well as the rest of the body (although the fused neuron study was observed in a petri dish and not in vivo)

so... it appears to be substantially less lethal at the moment, this does not mean it can't regain potency in the future, but in any case you still don't want to catch it and it is presently circulating

[themelodicenigma]

I've talked about Fang and Vanille a few times on here, and lately on twitter with someone, and...

It's just, straight forward, from a contextual standpoint.

Fang and Vanille are best friends, family—they are sisters beyond blood.

This starts even as early as the FFXIII World Preview where their relationship chart has them connected by "same surname/family name"—even before the game's release, the writers already implemented a connotation of familial connection between them.

We learn that this is written to reflect their ties to Oerba, where they were orphaned and grew up together in a tight knit community where the motto is "On Gran Pulse, we're all family". Which now we can understand the obvious construction here by the writers—utilizing this attribute of the Village surname to emphasize Fang and Vanille's familial ties and representation not through blood, but that of emotional connectivity. They're family.

So much, you even have this line of dialogue once you reach Oerba:

Hope: Which is your house? Vanille: What do you mean, which is ours? All of them. They're all ours. Fang: Yep. Everyone in the village. Snow: One big, happy family? Sazh: One heck of a lot of places to hang your hat.

Fang and Vanille are the ones to even extend this meaning onto the whole group. At the time of which the group has hit their stride of closeness and resolve, Fang is comfortable with them enough to refer to the group as her and Vanille's "new family". Fang even tries to sacrifice herself and risk Ragnarok for this new family:

Fang: I made another promise too, To protect my family. Sometimes… You've got choose!

There are MANY other paratexts that cover this as well because it's such a main component to their characters.

They're family.

Despite not being blood-related, they represent the concept very well, and extend this to the group. If you deny the connotation of "family" from Fang and Vanille, you don't know these characters. At all.

So, in what way are they family?

You can feel like you're family with many different relationships, obviously including romantic. People (somehow...) mistakenly believe that "family = platonic", despite, you know, the idea of a family starting very often comes from the institution of marriage. In regards "types of relationships" that are tangibly known around the world, family is considered the highest for obvious reasons, hence the movement to consider your close friends family, whether they additionally feel like a sibling or not, and to have your romantic partner feel like family, whether you get married or not.

It's a type of relationship just as much as it is a descriptor of a bond.

Anyway, despite not being related by blood, they're sisters to one another.

If you didn't interpret it yourself from the game, this is solidified within the FFXIII Ultimania Omega where the character relationship chart outright says they have a "sisterly relationship"—this is also featured in the updated Ultimania Archive, that includes even more characters. Fang's Profile in the Ultimania Archive even says they "grew up like sisters".

In accordance to this, which makes it less of an opinion and more of a fact, you have Fang's VA saying that to Fang, Vanille is a little sister within the Ultimania Omega interviews. You even have Benny Matsuyama, whose material is used for the LR novel and is credited in the game, writing about their sisterly relationship in Fang's Scenario story in the Ultimania.

Jun Eishima, hired directly by SE to make their novelizations, makes literal parallels twice between Lightning and Serah and Fang and Vanille, equating their sisterly bond through Fang and Lightning's treatment of their younger counterparts.

Take this information, and you have a leaning context to the meaning of other things that, true, for the sake of argument, don't mean sister outright.

Such as the two being marked as the "daughters of Etro" in FFXIII-2. For one time only, they are technically referred to as "the sisters" in ENG version by Noel when recounting the Legend of Cocoon to Serah at the beginning of the game. Or Serah herself furthering the parallels by saying Fang reminds her of Lightning when she first meets Fang in XIII-2.

There's the observable parallels (not direct) of both Lightning/Fang and Serah/Vanille having met individually in the 1st game, and another observable parallel in what Hope relays to Serah of what Sazh says about Lightning's "disappearance" in XIII-2 to Lightning speaking of Fang leaving Vanille alone. I mean damn, to top it off, Watanabe and Toriyama say THEMSELVES that Fang was turned into a female not only to have another female lead, but to avoid a "romantic mood" between her and Vanille (the logic of "female and female = inherent non-romance" is stupid, I know, but that was their mindset). This reinforces the fact they didn't write romanticism between the two characters—which, would explain all of the above existing.

etc. etc. etc.

It's established. It's consistent. And it's included with the usage of family because of the fact the relationship type is established. You don't need it to say sister every single time—that's just logic. Two blood-related sisters can talk about being family, and you're not going to have someone be like "BUT IN WHAT WAY?!"

Once it's established, it's there until something says otherwise.

This isn't some stupid localization decision—it's literally their character construction and implemented consistently throughout the entire franchise and all related material. And, there is NO deviation from this relationship type. No moment that Fang and Vanille stop being family, being sisters.

As far, wide, high, low that I've looked, there's not a single moment that shows these characters have deviated from this meaning. You have the typical emphasis of their bond (not type), which in typical fashion includes things like being irreplaceable to each other, being stronger than friendship (Fairy Tail, anyone?), and it being beyond even family. And this isn't even reserved for them—this happens frequently with Lightning and Serah, who they're paralleled with.

They are obviously a very good (and common) example of close friends and siblings—look beyond the typical, bland sibling relationships in media that 90% consist of just bickering with one another, and look for the pretty common, well established relationships that have a deep, contextual depth.

But also, we don't need to romanticize everything.

From all the real life examples, media examples, and just logical comprehension to understand the nature of actions or words (i.e. whether they are exclusively platonic, romantic, or contextually dependent)—there's plenty of material accessible to build the knowledge of how to comprehend these things, even if what YOU feel is different than what IS.

There isn't a single thing that Fang and Vanille have done or said that can't be understood within the bounds of everything I just mentioned above.

The next thing I'd want to do is go on a debunking spree of all the regurgitated, misinformed things I've seen for years, but this post is already long enough, and that honestly deserves it's own post.

Fang and Vanille, for so many years in fandom, have become just a byproduct of a widespread of misinformation, incomplete information, band-wagoning on both of those things without consulting the source, personal projection, and honestly, the over indulgence of romantic lenses people put on any two or more characters who care about each other.

Shipping doesn't even cause this, and absolutely extends to self-proclaimed non-shippers—this is people using romanticism as a means to just not attempt to see things more for what they are than just what you want it to be.

I promise you, you can absolutely say "well I see them as romantic, but I know they're not", and you won't break your brain. It's okay for you to ship something even if the evidence isn't romantic—I do this with Terra and Aqua from KH myself. I don't ship often, and they are one of my top picks, and yet I'll be the FIRST person to tell you there's no actual, provable romanticism implemented between them (yet...). I've had to discuss things with other shippers to NOT misconstrue things even if we're on the same "side".

It's just really annoying when people actively, unabashedly are false. And admittedly, about something that I actually do like. Despite being a hopeless romantic, I'm a sucker for good, platonic relationships, especially ones that have hogosha-like tonality, which I'd argue Fang and Vanille do—which again, would be ANOTHER parallel to Lightning and Serah.

[roguemonsterfucker]

Today's TheHunter adventures included getting up close and personal with wild crocodiles.

I found that you can hide pretty effectively from most animals and get extremely close without them alerting. Some of them eventually started getting agitated but none attacked.

My crocodile grind continued, of course, and I decided to go ahead and get one of the two Diamond level crocs on my map, just so I'd have him.

This caused me to rethink my displays so here's some pictures of my new and improved lodge.

Then after redecorating, I realized I had two trophies I hadn't put on display yet. So I added them.

The turkey is a gold level, but the little deer isn't anything special other than it being a pain in the ass to get for a quest.

So... Now time for a crocodile grind update.

As you may know, I'm attempting to employ a method referred to as "herd management" whereby you allegedly take advantage of the game's programming to cause higher level animals to spawn. It is theorized that the game wants to keep the average score of animals in the middle and thus you can trick it into spawning more high level animals by killing off first all the middle level animals and then the high level, causing the game to course correct by spawning only high levels to balance out the overabundance of low levels.

This sounds like a bunch of horse honky to me, but I like having something to aim for (pun intended at this point lol), so I set out on a quest to use this method of my beloved crocodiles.

I'm far far too early in the method to actually know for sure whether it works or not once you get to the final step, but the stats I'm seeing so far in spawn rates is very interesting.

Yesterday, a majority of respawns were either a higher or lower level than the crocs killed. While a not insignificant number did spawn in at the culled levels, almost just as many spawned in at higher levels, with a handful spawning in at lower levels.

Those are not at all the numbers I saw today.

Today I killed 56 crocodiles and 48 spawned in.

Two of those crocodiles were outside of the desired level. As previously mentioned, I killed one of the two highest level crocs, but I also accidentally killed a level 1 female. It is unclear if people believe females effect the herd management method or not, but almost all females spawn in at level 1 so if they do, they would be heavily weighting the average to the low end.

So I killed 54 crocs that were levels 5 and 6 today.

47 male crocs spawned to replace them. Of those 47:

7 spawned in at level 7

12 spawned in at levels 3 and 4

That leaves 28 spawning at levels 5 and 6, the same level that was killed.

As you can see, today has proportionately many more spawning at equal levels than yesterday. Here are the charts showing the level distribution after finishing my hunt for the day.

I definitely should have gotten pictures of the chart before I began hunting each day, but oh well.

I can tell you that 6 used to have much more than any other level and 5 was higher than 7 before I started. With much work, I've manged to significantly lower 5 and get 6 nearly equal with 7 (they are literally one apart).

So... what does it all mean?

I honestly don't know for sure yet.

Personally, I don't think the game takes into account what's already there. I feel like it's random but with the middle numbers being weighted more heavily.

But as I said, I'm early in this method. Obviously I'm making a lot of progress, but until 5 and 6 are brought completely down, I won't be able to proceed to the next step of the herd management method.

In some good news, though, I managed to get another rare color to spawn! I haven't found him yet but I know the general area he should be so I have high hopes.

[ninepentz]

Phenix Wilkerson missing 4 yo

**UPDATE AS OF 01/14/2024

**Phenix found safe!! Details at the bottom

So an autistic 4 year old suddenly went missing January 12th, around 12:30 pm. His mother had left the camper they were in to use the restroom elsewhere leaving Phenix with her bf at the time. Idk how he vanished all of a sudden, whether he wandered out alone or someone could of taken him but let's see what astrology can tell us about this case. Unfortunately I don't have his natal chart info which would help so much more to narrow down the chart but for now what we have is last time he was seen and we will go off that.

In astrology the moon is what we look to for missing child cases, so we start 1st with the moon.

Moon in Aquarius in the 10th house:

That's interesting, so something peculiar must of happened. Like it's possible that a friend of the mother/family could be responsible for this. Bc Aquarius is our friendships. It's possible at the time, Phenix was thinking he wanted to find someone to play with and was feeling very trusting at this time willing to do anything to make sure his "friends" are happy, maybe he saw someone else and wanted to make them his friend. In general Aquarius moons would choose friends over their own families sometimes, bc they feel that their family misunderstands them so that's why they often show more loyalty in friendships bc they have broken family life. Maybe he felt safety around random people he met and was willing to find shelter with them.

The 10th house is here bringing the public/authority figures/jobs/careers/establishments into play. Usually I relate the 10th house to our public image, any government job such as doctors, nurses, social workers, things of that nature where they have an important role in the publics wellbeing, it's a professional type atmosphere that the 10H brings. So this is confusing me a little. But whatever Aquarius being in the 10th house would represent can tell us a lot about what could of happened here.

What this can also show is that if Phenix didn't have any serious life threatening accident, he may just be around people who aren't socially connected/aware/loner types, who don't keep up with what's going on in today's times. They would be very unique, strange, out of the loop people. They could def be malicious but at this point I'm just brainstorming here, if anyone would like to share what they see that would be appreciated.

Moon conjunct MC:

That's very weird bc moon conjunct MC is very similar to moon in the 10th. But with Aquarius as the moon is being very specific as what type of influence the moon is having. This tells me that he will be def found, moon is the missing child and MC is law enforcement the public eye. So conjunct means that they are working very well together, which brings about a positive outcome. This is not to say that he will be found alive tho, but all I know is that when there's positive aspects to the MC in missing persons cases and it usually shows that the person will be found. MC is much like the sun in astrology but different purposes obviously bc they are both visible to the public eye, which means that these people in missing persons cases when connected to these placements positively will not be hidden away, they will be out in the open for everyone to see.

With Aquarius here this will be a very unique case.

Moon conjunct Pluto in the 10th house:

That's interesting Pluto is also on the cusp of late degree Capricorn and early degree of Aquarius.

Pluto in Aquarius would be, destruction/transformation of technology, consciousness, intellect, the way the world works, individuals/individuality, the way we connect to each other. Pluto in Aquarius in general may have an ego problem, may be controlling in some way when it comes to their beliefs, abilities. Planet Pluto in Aquarius may clash with one another, making Aquarius traits more forceful and stubborn.

But also being on the cusp of Capricorn 2 things can happen, we are either nearing the end of a cycle that is almost complete which would be what Pluto in Capricorn has caused in the world already to transform societal structures, expose cooperations, transform the way we use money etc. Or Aquarius (early degrees) which would be something new and still at the stage that we are undeveloped, free, naive.

Moon conjunct Pluto tells me that someone is very controlling, resourceful, intuitive, emotional, manipulative, obsessive. Maybe Phenix is with another person imo, they see him as very unique and are able to control him.. this is just something that popped into my head as I'm researching this. And it may have something to do with money being involved, a job of some sort. Especially during Capricorn season everyone wants to be more successful, rich, stable, and they're also more insecure about their ability to lead their lives and attract money/success. So this will be a big theme for whatever situation took place.

Moon 10th square Jupiter in the 12th:

This to me this seems like he may have wandered far away, possibly where he's somewhat hidden since the 12th house is the unseen realm. Maybe he fell into the water or something like that. But in general what this tells me is that he traveled or was taken quite a distance away, unlike mercury which would be closer by. Jupiter shows us something that's foreign to us, different from us culturally etc. Maybe Phenix was in a weird mood this day being very dramatic, curious, overdoing things, overestimating himself, testing limits. This would basically place us in a position where we lower our standards where sometimes we know better not to do certain things, but during this transit our standards are low. Like for example I find myself overeating/being lazier during moon square or opposite Jupiter and/or Venus transit, even tho I've been consistently trying very hard to be strict with intermittent fasting routine. But it can be a deep physiological thing with the moon here like our hormones or emotional state.

Moon square ASC:

It's possible that if anyone were to see Phenix while he wandered off they would know that he was alone and in a bad place, bc during the time he went missing he wasn't wearing any shoes. So the ascendant is our looks/personality, maybe with the moon here they just saw him as an abandoned/bad child I guess? Bc square is a harsh aspect that basically makes things stand out like a sore thumb, but also it's an energetic transit that's would make a person not react to things in a balanced, fair way, it shows frustration and force.

Unfinished, need to look at many other aspects/placements but feel free to comment on what you see here as I def can use the help interpreting this case ATM stress has really did a number on my brain, so I'm more unclear and confused lately unfortunately which is why I haven't been doing as many forensic readings.

UPDATE!!

Thankfully this 4 year old sweet boy was found safe 2 days later, from what I know is that he was found in the woods nearby and he didn't have any immediate visible injuries. All the articles I tried to find more information on didn't say much besides that phenix was found safe but if you would like more details, here's a fb group below the next photo that was very involved in this case which could provide more information.

Phoenix Wilkerson case discussion page👇

What they're currently talking about in this case is that phenix doesn't look like a child who was in 32°, rainy weather for the past 2 days bc he looks surprisingly clean. They are speculating that something else may have happened and therefore the discussion page will stay up until all the facts are cleared. Imo if it was raining hard then yeah he would def be very dirty by now.

*NEWEST UPDATE AS OF 01/18/2024

They are saying that Phenix will not be going back to his mother at this time and is in custody to rule out where he should be placed. He may be in foster care which imo that would be a better idea than to be at risk for being lost again.. idk a lot about his mother but if even law enforcement doesn't trust giving back the baby to his mother than that says a lot. And I agree with them. Motherhood is very hard I must admit, but there's not a second that I don't worry about my child and where he is. The article also states that it's to early to know whether someone will be charged or not so that's interesting.

This is the 1st case I've done where the child was found safe, so yeah def a unique one for me lol I'm so glad he's back home with his family and hopefully the mother will be more responsible next time and not leave her children alone with others. I understand some of the information I interpreted about this case was way off, but like I said I haven't been able to think clearly bc of whatever I'm going through right now. I tried my best tho and there was some parts I got right, this case will def be another I can learn from and review for my future cases ❤️

✨Nine of Pentacles✨

[kfanopinions]

[WAYV] who is mtl to be possessive?

*taking this from the exo request i did, loved looking into this and learning more about astrology and such ^^ plus, like i've said...i need more wayv on here hehe love those guys*

*a little fyi before you continue, this is my personal opinion + their sun signs ♥*

MOST

kun

winwin

xiaojun

hendery

yangyang

ten

LEAST

kun:

okay, kun is a capricorn and they have a tendency to feel possessive/jealous when someone comes in with higher specs than they have. what i mean by higher specs [in the updated version of kimi wa petto the main girl talks about wanting a boyfriend who: is tall, went to a prestigious school [harvard etc], has a well paying job [more than not makes a higher salary than her] so think of specs in that sense. kun is such a multi-talented person and seems to want to try out and get some kind of certificate in a lot of his hobbies ☺️

with all of his interests [no doubt he has done stuff we don’t know and it’s probably awesome to hear everything he’s done] i think if he got a whiff of some person walking in like "yeah i went to blah blah blah school" and "i've invested blah blah blah into w/e" and “i've been to blah blah blah country doing this type of work for w/e reason" and his s/o shows signs of intrigue/interest or astonishment that is when he'll feel like "hold up..." 😠😤

winwin:

he's a scorpio the end.

jkjk despite the fact that winwin is a scorpio [my scorpio brother from another mother] i wanted to put him further down on the list. it's weird...i'm either not paying attention to him as much as the others [he does sometimes fade into the background for me, typical scorpio behavior at times] so it's like..."in what situation would winwin be jealous?" 🤔

however, with scorpio's we get possessive/jealous when someone enters our territory. look i've read on so many occasions and i've experienced this myself, but we can sum up whether someone is good/bad/whether we like them or not, from the first couple of seconds of meeting them. it's a weird thing and i have a pretty good winning streak in this department 😉 so if he deems someone as a threat you better believe he’s going to act possessive in some shape or form

i'll also say this, we're constantly trying to figure people's intentions out and that in itself can mean some possessive behavior. i'ts like always wondering what a persons ulterior motive is. so with winwin being a scorpio [even if i don't 100% see him being this high up on the chart] something is telling me to put him here, so i'm going with my gut!

oh and one last thing…it takes scorpios sooooooooooooo and i do mean soooooooo long to put their faith and trust in people. when you’ve worked that long trying to trust someone i can tell ya this — you will fight to keep that person in your life 😋 c'est la vie to whoever tried to barge into the relationship 🤣

xiaojun:

xiaojun is a leo and this may come as a shocker [not really] but leo's like to be adored [think alex the lion from madagascar 😊] he wants to be his partners one and only [so sweet] 🥰 and he wants all their love and attention and when that is going to someone else...well...those negative feelings start to bubble. it’s not bad, his s/o just needs to shower him in affection and attention and remind him how much they love him and he'll be fine

[i have a leo friend and he gets sulky if i don't give him attention...it's exhausting 😮‍💨😅]

hendery and yangyang:

THE LIBRAS ♥

okay, libras are about balance ⚖️ but i'll say this just like virgos [my mom's a virgo] they COMPARE/ JUDGE [well mom judges but same diff in this case] libra's will feel this possessive/jealous feeling when they look at others as a possible threat. in this case, "man he's taller than me" or "why is he so good looking...is he even real?" think about things like that.

i think both hendery and yangyang are soooooooooooo chill but i mean...yangyang has said it that he thinks he's cute [he is love you yangyang] but it's when negative nancy decides to pull up in her car with comparison charlie [totally made up comparison charlie 🤣] is where things get muddled and the need to keep their partner away from that person, or wanting to keep their partners focus on them comes into play

ten:

finally, our pisces...

okay, so my dad is a pisces and i don't know if it's a trait that pisces people have but they just seem to have A LOT OF CONFIDENCE... like “yeah i love love and i know how to work a room and my charms to get what i want”

[ten saying he has honey skin and you need to taste it as an example] 😅

don't get me wrong pisces people do get jealous and possessive but out of the other signs, not as much. it's like they know when they get jealous and then stop it before it gets out of control. also, they seem to be in their own dream and fantasy world half the time [no offense my pisces people love you guys] but unless someone was flirting right in front of him, or he caught on rather quickly to a situation happening he probably won't know. also fyi, this is definitely not a sign you want to make jealous - he'll feel hurt/disappointed more than jealous/possessive so please be careful with a pisces they feel their feelings so deeply

[jamaisjoons]

intro: her VIII ⤑ knj | m

⟶ 𝑠𝑢𝑚𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑦:〝 you enter namjoon’s life in the most unexpected of ways, but will you be able to stay, especially when he comes with three adorable but chaotic children, even more chaotic best friends and a bitch of an ex-wife? not to mention your own emotional baggage. 〞singe dad au.

❥ 𝑝𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑖𝑛𝑔: single dad!namjoon x marine vet!reader⏤ sᴇʀɪᴇs ɢᴇɴʀᴇ: angst • fluff • smut

❥ 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑟𝑒: angst ⋆ fluff

❥ 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑑 𝑐𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡: 5.5k

⟶ 𝑤𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠: allusions to smut but other than that, none

➵ 𝑎/𝑛: hello,,, this is,,, the long-anticipated next chapter! hope you enjoy :)

⏤ Previous || Masterlist || Next

Thursday evening, Namjoon finds himself trudging home from Jin Hit Entertainment. The minute he steps into his home, however, he’s immediately bombarded with three bodies. Taehyung and Jimin cling to each of his legs, Jungkook standing slightly behind. Hoseok follows the boys, smiling at Namjoon.

“Any luck with your next song?” Hoseok asks, Namjoon shaking his head. For the last week and a half, ever since your disastrous end to an almost perfect date, Namjoon had thrown himself into his work to try and take his mind off of you.

“Daddy! Let’s go to the aquarium!” Jimin suggests with a bright toothy smile on his face, his cheeks squishing up into his eyes. Namjoon freezes, Hoseok looking at his age-mate and best friend in sympathy.

"Please daddy! We wanna see noona," Taehyung pouts. The entire time, Jungkook keeps quiet, looking at his father expectantly.

"I don't know if that's a good idea buddy," Namjoon begins, already grimacing from the way Jimin's eyes begin tearing up.

"I wanna see noona," Jungkook calls out. Namjoon sighs.

"I don't know if we can Kook," Namjoon replies. Namjoon can't help but wonder if you even wanted to see them.

"But it's Thursday daddy! We always see noona at the aquayum on Thursday," Jungkook answers back, stomping his little foot while his eyebrows furrow. This was what Namjoon hadn't wanted. How the hell was he supposed to explain to his sons that they may never see you again?

"Kookie, calm down," Hoseok says, trying to placate Jungkook. Jungkook, however, only grows more agitated, his eyes tearing up.

"I wanna see noona!" Jungkook repeats, his voice growing louder.

"Daddy, please! Let's go see noona," Taehyung pipes in, tugging at Namjoon's legs. Namjoon's heart grips, and he wonders if he'd made a mistake by asking you out.

"Take me to see noona!" Jungkook cries. Jungkook’s words, paired with the exhaustion Namjoon feels from work along with Jimin and Taehyung's cries cause him to finally snap.

"No! We're not seeing noona today," Namjoon finally yells. Jimin and Taehyung freeze, and instantly, they let go off their father's trouser legs as they look at him in fear. Jimin shies away, eyes downcast at having upset his father. Jungkook's face scrunches up further, clear devastation written all over his face while Taehyung’s bottom lip trembles. Namjoon's face softens as he realises that he'd just yelled at his sons out of frustration.

"I'm sorry-" Namjoon begins apologising, but before he can even finish his sentence, Jungkook turns and runs away and up the stairs, towards his room. Jimin sniffles, Taehyung grabbing his hand as they both follow Jungkook. Namjoon lets out another sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose.

"Damn, I haven't seen you this worked up in a while. You wanna talk about it?" Hoseok asks, looking at Namjoon in worry. Namjoon simply shakes his head, letting out another frustrated sigh.

"It's just... Everything was going so well, and I had to ruin it. Now the boys miss her and more than that I miss her - but I also know I need to give her her space. I just… I need to know if she’s coming back… And if she doesn't, I don't know how to tell the boys that they'll never see her again," Namjoon mumbles, his heart clenching in his chest.

"You didn't ruin anything. She loves the boys and she really likes you. You just need to give her some time because I can understand where she's coming from. Being a parent isn't an easy task, she probably needs time to make her decision," Hoseok says sympathetically, walking up to Namjoon before placing his hand on Namjoon’s shoulder.

"What if her decision is that she doesn't want to be with me? Or that she doesn't want to be their mother?" Namjoon whispers, dread washing over him as he utters the words out loud. Hoseok empathetically pats Namjoon's back.

"I'm sure it won't come to that. Though if it does, well, we'll burn that bridge when we get to it," Hoseok replies, Namjoon humourlessly chuckling. With an exhausted exhale, he rubs his face before following his sons, knowing he needed to make amends.

Meanwhile, you sit in your office, poring over the different papers littered around your desk. Most of them are just charts and health records of the different marine mammals at the aquarium. You should be going through them and updating your online records, but you simply can't concentrate. Your eyes continuously flick towards the watch on your wrist. With a sigh of frustration, you push the papers away from you. This isn’t working. Your brain is far too preoccupied with whether Namjoon will bring the boys to the aquarium or not. It’s nearing closing time, which meant that any moment Namjoon should text you saying he'd be bringing the boys over.

You wait for several minutes. Time ticks incredibly slowly, the clock in your office practically mocking you with each tick. Fifteen minutes later, you realise that Namjoon isn't coming. You can't help the sinking feeling in your stomach. Is he mad at you? He has every right to be. You still aren’t sure whether you are ready to be a mother. It’s a huge task. More than that, however, you have no idea how to be a mother or have people rely on you the way children rely on a parent.

With the knowledge that Namjoon isn't coming with the boys, you hunch back over your papers, ready to do some actual work. Taking those few days off to take care of the boys had been a bad idea. You’re the head veterinarian, and with your absence, the paperwork has built up considerably more than you had anticipated. A fond smile crawls onto your lips, and involuntarily, you lean back into your seat, staring at the wall across from you. You can’t help but remember how you'd had to rub Jimin's soft little belly to 'help' with the ache. It was definitely a hoax, but it had worked as a brilliant placebo, instantly calming Jimin's cries.

Your mind wanders further, remembering the way Taehyung had sleepily waddled up to you, begging for a story despite being half asleep. His words had only caused Jungkook and Jimin to gravitate towards you, and before you could even say no, they'd already dragged you to their father's room for a bedtime story.

Suddenly, the smile on your face curves downwards, a pensive frown on your face. You shake your head, trying to clear your thoughts. You have work to do! You can’t just sit here reminiscing over the boys. Though try as hard as you may, your mind simply refuses to focus on the papers in front of you, and you find your thoughts once again wandering. You wonder if Jimin has finished his antibiotics and if he and Taehyung are happily playing pirates in the mud much to their father's chagrin. When Jungkook's face flashes into your mind, you find yourself smiling softly, and you wonder if he’s doing okay.

Immediately, you freeze, eyes wide. You’re missing them - but it isn’t just that you were missing them. You’re worried about them - worried if they’re okay; if they’re listening to Namjoon; if they’re missing you as much as you’re missing them. The chiming of your phone draws your attention. Your heart speeds up with hope, eyes momentarily flicking towards the clock on your office wall. Is it Namjoon? Perhaps he was running late but is bringing the boys after all. Quickly, you grab your phone, swiftly unlocking it.

Your shoulders slump. It's not Namjoon. Disappointment sinks into your stomach, and you lean back in your seat once again.

Now, your mind wanders to the man who had been occupying your heart and mind lately. His words from your date echo in your mind. You wanted to be with Namjoon, your heart practically yearns for him, and you miss not only him, but the boys too - for every day this past week and a half that you hadn't seen them. Recently, they'd been a constant in your life. You want to see them, but you knew you couldn't without making a decision. Are you ready to be a mother? Are you ready to give Namjoon that much commitment? All your worries swirl in your head. There are so many what-ifs. What if the boys don’t want you to be their mother? What if you and Namjoon break up? What if it turns out you’re a terrible parental figure?

The chiming of your phone once again draws your attention. Picking up your phone, you frown slightly when Hoseok's name flashes across the screen. You unlock your phone before opening your texts. The minute your eyes read the message, your heart grips. 'Missing you' is the only thing the text reads, but attached to the message is a picture of Namjoon and the boys cuddled up on the sofa. You swallow thickly, and before you know what you're doing, you're getting up and grabbing your coat. That single message had finally made you come to a decision.

It doesn’t matter that you’re scared. You want to be with them, and that’s all that matters.

Almost two hours later, you find yourself in front of Namjoon’s door. You’ve no idea how long you’ve been standing outside, contemplating whether to knock or not. The burgers and chips you’ve bought as a poor attempt at a peace offering have probably gone cold by now, yet you can’t seem to bring yourself to knock or ring the doorbell. Stepping back, you pace along the length of the porch. Is it alright for you to stop by so suddenly - especially after the way you had practically run out on Namjoon? Perhaps this is a bad idea. Despite your negative thoughts, your feet stay rooted to the ground, staring at the dark wood of Namjoon’s front door.

The image of Namjoon and the boys cuddling flashes through your mind, and before you can stop yourself, your hand reaches out to ring the doorbell. Thunderously, your heart palpitates in your chest, and your palms turn sweaty. Pulling your lip between your teeth, you chew on the flesh, almost breaking the skin. Time moves excruciatingly slowly, the moments drawn out as you await someone to answer the door. After what feels like an eternity, Namjoon’s face appears on the intercom.

“Oh,” Namjoon says, sucking in a sharp breath when he spots you on the other side of the camera. You shuffle from one foot to the other, looking at him sheepishly.

“Can-” you start, your voice already shaky. Your fist clenches, nails digging painfully into your palm as you steel your nerves. “Can I come in?” you manage to choke out.

“I- Let me come to you,” Namjoon says, and then you hear the click of the intercom as it turns black. You can’t help the way your heart plummets it your chest, though you know it’s completely deserving for Namjoon to be sceptical. Moments later, the front door opens, and you shuffle back. Namjoon is dressed casually in loose shorts and a sleeveless top, his arms on display. Arms you long to be nestled in. Swallowing thickly, you fight to focus on your thoughts, knowing you’d have to explain yourself.

“What are you doing here?” Namjoon asks, looking at you warily. There’s a small inkling of hope in his eyes, however, it’s drowned out by the hesitation in them.

“I- I missed you,” you breathe out. Your voice is barely above a whisper and so full of emotion that it automatically has your heart gripping. Namjoon’ eyes soften slightly, and he lets out a small sigh.

“I- we missed you too, but we’re gonna need more than that,” Namjoon says, correcting his words to include his sons. Hastily, you blink, trying to suppress the tears welling up in your eyes.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry. I was just running scared because I hadn’t really thought about being a mother to the boys and what it meant to really be with you. Then you said all those things, and I just- it was too much for me. I got out of a really, really bad relationship a year and a half ago, and I didn’t expect to meet someone else. I didn’t expect to meet you, and I certainly didn’t expect to fall for you, and it just… it terrified me. I didn’t know what to do, so I ran, but then this week… I missed you and the boys so much and-” you’re rambling at this point, words just tumbling out of your mouth, and you hope to whatever god is out there that they make sense. You take in a deep, shuddering breath as you attempt to calm your nerves, “what I’m trying to say is, I want to try. I want to be with you, and I want to be a mother to the boys,” you finish, looking at him earnestly.

“I-” Namjoon begins, unsure of what to say. There’s so much he wants. He wants to tell you it’s okay and he understands. He wants to pull you in his arms and kiss you senseless. He wants to tell you he may, quite possibly, be in love with you. Despite all his wants, however, he needs to make sure this is what you really want. “I want to try too, but… but I can’t just let someone into my life who’s not going to stay. I can’t let someone in and have the boys fall in love with them just for them to leave us. I want to be with you too, but I need commitment. I need security,” Namjoon breathes out. He needs you to be sure.

“I know. I want to be the one to give you that,” you reply without hesitation. Namjoon’s eyes widen slightly. Abruptly, his eyes search yours, looking for any, any shred of apprehension. He finds none. You’ve never been more sure of anything in your life.

Unable to resist, Namjoon steps forward. Instantly, his hands cup your cheeks, and then he’s pulling you into him. The minute his lips caress yours, your hand lets go of the carrier bag containing the food, and it drops with a thud, undoubtedly messing up the burgers, but you don’t care. Instead, your hands thread through the hair at the nape of his neck, drawing him closer to you. You step closer, your chests touching as you sink into the feeling of your kiss.

Time seems to gradually slow down until it comes to a halt and the world slowly fades away. The taste of Namjoon’s lips slowly drives you wild, his tongue licking the seam of your mouth. With a gasp, your mouth slowly falls open, allowing his tongue to poke through into your warm cavern. His grip on your cheeks is strong, fingers splaying into your hair as his tongue languidly moves against yours. Tongues dance sensually, almost erotically, and you find yourself moaning into his mouth. When Namjoon pulls your bottom lip between his plump, albeit slightly chapped, lips you gasp, your toes curling.

You’re completely wired, almost overwhelmed with all the sensations. His tongue is sweet against yours, and you can taste his strawberry chapstick on your lips while his breath fans across your face. You feel his fingers thread into your hair, pulling you closer until his lips practically crush into yours, mouths moving in tandem. It almost feels as if he’s trying to meld you together, wanting to feel you as close as is physically possible without you coalescing into one being.

Deliberately, you ignore that gradual ache that builds deep within your chest, your lungs practically crying for oxygen. You want to feel him more, taste him more, hear more of the little moans and breathless sighs that leave his lips and circulate the air. You have no idea how long you’re both locked in your embrace, refusing to pull away from the other. Eventually, however, the ache ignites so viciously that you both pull away, gasping.

His breath is hot and heavy against your chin as he pants. You’re no better, chest heaving as you try to appease the burn. Namjoon, recovering faster, presses his lips to your swollen ones once again, desperately wanting to taste you. You moan against his lips.

This time, your kiss isn’t as mellow but is, instead, needier. His tongue practically ravishes yours, lashing in your mouth with expert strokes. The way he leaves you senseless is completely unfair, and you chalk it down to his rapper status. Namjoon’s tongue is practically a weapon, expertly curling and twisting in your mouth in intricate moves. So intricate, in fact, that you wonder if it had a mind of its own. Is it even humanly possible for a tongue to be that agile?

Short moments later, you’re once again breaking the kiss. Your lungs still hadn’t recovered from your previous kiss, and once again, he leaves you completely breathless. Namjoon allows you to recover, thumb rubbing at your cheek as he brushes his nose against yours. You mewl under his actions, eyes slowly fluttering open. You don’t even remember exactly when they had shut. His visage is the first thing that greets your eyes, his onyx irises swimming with emotion.

“Gods, I missed you,” Namjoon breathes out, his lips skimming yours once again.

“I’m here now,” you murmur, relishing in the scent of burnt amber and sweet vanilla that lingers around him.

“Namjoonie is everything okay?” Hoseok’s voice breaks out. The result is jarring, and you’re immediately broken out of the bubble you and Namjoon had found yourselves in. You blink owlishly before turning to look at the newcomer. Hoseok looks between you two, his face passive but his eyes questioning. Namjoon doesn’t pull away; his eyes remain glued to you while his thumb moves to caress your lip.

“Everything is perfect,” Namjoon replies, and you smile tenderly at him, kissing the pad of his thumb.

“As happy as I am for the two of you, this is kind of getting gross,” Hoseok says, his eyes twinkling with mirth. Namjoon lets out an exasperated sigh while he rolls his eyes.

“Shut up Hobi,” you mutter, poking your tongue out at him.

“Well, now that you’ve got this all under control. The boys are demanding you watch a movie during dinner, but I’m exhausted so I’m gonna head off. Be safe kids,” Hoseok chuckles with a teasing wink. You watch as Hoseok waves goodbye before he’s walking off towards his car.

“I love him, but he can be really annoying,” you scowl, muttering under your breath. Namjoon’s lips curl upwards lopsidedly, the dimples in his cheeks indenting. Your heart leaps into your throat at the sight of his smile. Out of everything you had missed the past week and a half; his smile was probably the thing you missed the most. Once again, he pulls your face closer to him before his lips caress your forehead.

“Come on, let’s go in. The boys really missed you today. They wanted me to take them to the aquarium, but… I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to come...” Namjoon trails off, rubbing the back of his neck. Your chest contracts, heart dropping before you reach up, leaning your palms on his chest, and kiss the corner of his lush lips.

“I wanted you to come - but it’s okay,” you say. Namjoon grabs your hands on his chest and brushes his lips across the knuckles. He watches as you bend down to grab the food bag before he drags you inside. You follow his broad figure, allowing him to lead you towards the living room. The minute you step into the living room, the boys’ heads snap towards you. Jungkook’s eyes light up. Immediately, he climbs off the couch and runs towards you, his little feet carrying him as quick as they can. Jimin and Taehyung follow his lead, not too far behind.

“Noona!” Jungkook cries, throwing himself into your legs.

“Gukkie! Hi baby, did you miss noona?” you ask. You peel Jungkook from your legs before crouching down to his level. Jungkook nods enthusiastically, the little pouch in his cheek puffing out.

“Me too! Me too! I missed noona too!” Taehyung says, small fists tightening into your trousers. Jimin doesn’t say anything, instead, just holding tightly onto the material by your elbow. Reflexively, your heart lurches in your chest. How were you going to walk out on them just a short while back? You had almost made the worst decision of your life by running scared. Drawing in a deep breath, you tenderly pet Jungkook’s head before smiling at the twins.

“I missed you boys too,” you reply, pulling them in for a hug. Here and now, with them in your arms, you know that this is the best decision you have ever made. Namjoon smiles softly at the scene. He grabs the plastic bag of food and rummages through it before looking at you curiously.

“Hamburgers?”

“Yeah, I didn’t know what to pick up, but I know they’re Taehyung’s favourite,” you reply as you stand up. Taehyung’s eyes twinkle with joy before he’s running towards his father.

“Hamburgers! Daddy, hamburgers!” Taehyung joyfully yells, jumping up and down. Namjoon tuts and pulls the bag higher out of Taehyung’s reach.

“Calm down tiger. Boys, stay with noona, and pick a film, I’ll grab plates and cups,” Namjoon says. Immediately, Jungkook grabs your hand, dragging you towards the shelf filled with DVDs while he runs his mouth.

“OH!” Jungkook gasps before he’s standing on his tiptoes, fingertips stretching for a DVD. Aiding him, you pull it out and hand the case towards coconut haired boy.

“Let’s watch Toy Stoyee!” Jungkook cheers, holding up the DVD case triumphantly.

“No! I wanna watch Mulan!” Taehyung says, eyebrows knitting together.

“No! Buzz!” Jungkook replies, his features scrunched into a scowl. Jimin stands beside you, watching as Jungkook and Taehyung begin their little back and forth of ‘Toy Story’ and ‘Mulan’. You have no idea what to do, should you say something? Did you have a right to intervene? You’re shocked, however, when in a fit of rage, Jungkook throws the DVD case down, pushing Taehyung.

“Toy Stoyee!” Jungkook yells as Taehyung tumbles to the ground. Instinctively, you dive forward and catch Taehyung before he can fall. Taehyung’s bottom lip quivers before he’s spinning in your arms and crying into your stomach.

“Jungkook! That’s not nice, you don’t push,” you chastise, gently hushing Taehyung as his tears soak through your shirt. Jungkook’s flinches, having never been yelled at by you, eyes tearing up at the way you comfort Taehyung.

“Taehyungie, it’s okay. He didn’t mean it,” you coo, gently petting Taehyung’s hair.

“Noona I’m soyee,” Jungkook whimpers. Eyes softening, you gesture him over. Without a second thought, Jungkook rushes towards you, clinging to your thigh as he cries into your hip. Jimin turns away from you as you continue comforting both the crying boys and walks towards the shelf, looking over at it with curious eyes.

“There, there. It’s okay,” you murmur, softly patting both their backs until they calm down. Once the crying stifles to little sniffles, you pull them both away from you.

“Better?” you ask, both of them nodding. “Good, now Kookie, I want you to apologise to Taehyungie. It’s not nice to push,” you say firmly, giving him a pointed look. Jungkook pouts, his tongue poking into his cheek before he murmurs his apology while staring at his feet.

“It’s okay Gukkie,” Taehyung says, wiping away his tears before sending a large, toothy boxed smiled towards his younger brother. Jungkook nods, holding tightly onto your hand as he buries his face into your thigh.

“What do you wanna watch noona?” Jimin asks, and you find your face crumpling at how adorably thoughtful Jimin was.

“I don’t mind. Since Kookie and Tae can’t choose a film, why don’t you choose?” you suggest with a soft smile. Jimin cocks his head before nodding and turning back to the shelf stocked with DVDs. Suddenly, his eyes light up and he pulls a case off the shelf.

“Nemo! Let’s watch Nemo! Daddy likes Nemo! Do you like Nemo, noona?” Jimin asks, his little legs carrying him over towards you. He stops just in front of you, holding up the DVD while he smiles brightly. The way his cheeks bunch up into his eyes, his lids turning into half-moons has your heart clenching from how absolutely adorable he is.

“Okay, I’ve got everything here. It took a while to reheat ever- is everything alright?” Namjoon asks in alarm as his eyes sweep over Taehyung’s puffy eyes and Jungkook clinging onto you desperately.

“Everything is fine, Tae and Kook just got into a little argument,” you reply with a reassuring smile. Namjoon lets out an exasperated sigh before nodding.

“Alright, as long as it’s all under control. Have you picked a film?” Namjoon asks, placing down the tray of burgers, fries, and drinks.

“Mhm. We’ve settled on Finding Nemo, haven’t we puppy?” you ask, turning to Jimin. The boy in question nods enthusiastically, running towards his father and handing him the DVD.

The five of you settle on the sofa as the first scene begins to play. Taehyung happily sits between you and Namjoon, munching on his hamburger, eyes barely focused on the film. Jungkook clings to you, scarfing down his burger so quickly you were worried he’d get the hiccups or worse, a stomach ache, but he soldiers on, completely unbothered. Jimin practically lies on Namjoon’s lap, picking at his fries every now and then, completely engrossed in the film.

For the most of it, it’s pretty quiet, and halfway through the film - when everyone has long since finished their dinner - the boys slowly start drifting off to sleep. You briefly glance at the watch strapped to your wrist, realising it was well past their bedtime. Jungkook’s head falls onto your stomach, Taehyung’s legs in your lap as his head rests against Namjoon’s side, hair flopping in front of his eyes. Jimin has completely crawled into Namjoon’s lap, small arms thrown over his father’s stomach as small snores escape his plump lips.

“Do you think we should-” you begin, wondering whether you should move the boys to their rooms. Namjoon, however, is completely engrossed in the film, eyes sparkling at the characters. When you speak, he turns towards you, cutting you off.

“Do I think we should get a fish tank? Yes,” Namjoon says. The first thing that strikes you is that he’s so engrossed in the film that he hasn’t even realised his sons have fallen into a deep sleep. The second thing that strikes you is his use of ‘we’ as if you had any say in what he did in his own home. It makes it seem as if you’re a permanent part of his life -as if he considered you part of his family. The word causes your heart to soar. You’ve never loved the word ‘we’ so much.

“No, that’s not what I was going to say, but if you really want one I don’t see why we can’t get one. Anyway, what I was going to say was, do you think we should take the boys to bed?” you ask, finishing off your previous sentence. Namjoon blinks, expression blank, and then he turns to his sons, eyes expanding as if he’d only just realises his sons were next to him. Immediately, his cheeks heat.

“Oh, yeah. We probably should,” Namjoon says, but you don’t miss the way his eyes momentarily flick toward the TV, almost glimpsing longingly at the film. You roll your eyes in exasperation.

“Come on you big baby, we can finish the film later,” you reply already picking up Jungkook. Namjoon lets out a small sigh before turning off the TV.

“No, it’s fine. I’m kinda tired now anyway,” Namjoon yawns before he picks up both Jimin and Taehyung, one in each arm. You gulp when you notice the way his muscles ripple, corded flesh flexing under his tan skin. Has he always been that muscular? Surely not.

Namjoon leads the way upstairs, and carefully you follow, trying your hardest not to wake up the sleeping boy in your arm. Soon, however, you realise another problem - mainly, that Namjoon was slightly ahead of you. Climbing up the stairs, he gives you a perfect view of his ass in his loose shorts. The material billows around him with each step, only accentuating the shape of his taut cheeks. You swallow thickly as you attempt to fight off your traitorous thoughts.

Luckily for you, the flight of stairs is relatively short. The sigh of relief that escapes your lips when the torture ends is almost inaudible. Almost. Namjoon quirks an eyebrow at you curiously, and your cheeks flush in embarrassment before you shake your head. Namjoon’s face contorts as he looks at you strangely. Pointedly, you ignore him, walking into Jungkook’s room instead. Namjoon stares at your back in confusion before he shrugs it off and enters the twins’ bedroom.

As gently as you can, you place Jungkook in his little race car bed before tucking him under the covers. Instead of immediately leaving, however, you pause and perch on the side of the bed. Your eyes wander over his figure, his little cheek swelling onto his pillow as thin lips pull into a pout. Unhesitantly, you find yourself reaching out and brushing the wisps of his hair out of his forehead, admiring how soft his locks are.

That’s how Namjoon finds you. When you don’t emerge out of the bedroom, he gets slightly worried and follows you into Jungkook’s room. He stops short, however, when he notices the way you tenderly stroke Jungkook’s hair. Leaning against the doorway, Namjoon can’t help the way his heart soars at how attentive you were being. Initially, when you’d appeared at his doorstep, he’d been worried that somehow, sometime, you’d start running scared. However, seeing the way you oh so gently, incredibly tenderly, caress Jungkook’s cheek, he knows you won’t be running scared any longer.

He almost hates himself when he lets out a quiet cough, breaking up the affectionate scene. You still, head snapping to face him. Instantly, you know you’ve been caught red-handed. You smile sheepishly at him, Namjoon returning his own soft smile before reaching out his hand towards you. Tenderly, you grab his hand, marvelling at his large palm in yours. It practically dwarfs your own hand. Namjoon leads you out of the rooms, but, before he can lead you back downstairs, you halt and tug his hand. Namjoon stops and turns to you, looking at you questioningly.

“I don’t have work tomorrow, I took the day off,” you nervously reply, your hand almost imperceptibly trembling in his - out of anticipation or anxiousness, you have no idea. Namjoon blinks at you dumbly.

“With the amount of days you’re taking off they’re going to fire you,” Namjoon points out. He clearly did not get the hidden meaning behind your words. You find yourself unable to prevent your eyes from rolling. Honestly, how was he so clever and yet so oblivious at the same time? Though, you muse, it only added to his charm.

“Yes, well, it’s a good thing I have a rich boyfriend then,” you joke. Your mouth moves before you can even ponder the words as they spill from your mouth. Then, you both freeze. Your words are heavy and linger in the air. Namjoon looks at you, eyes wide and irises slightly blown out.

“I- sorry, is that okay? I don’t want to assume,” you quickly blurt out. Namjoon, however, is immediately pulling your hand and you stumble into him. As a way to brace yourself, your hands find themselves on his chest, feeling the defined pecs. Namjoon doesn’t waste a single second. Instantaneously, he lowers his head, and before long, his luscious lips find themselves on yours. The kiss is brief, Namjoon’s hand moving to cup your chin, thumb caressing your cheek. When he pulls away, you let out a little sigh, your lips chasing his.

“You’re not assuming. It’s… perfect,” Namjoon answers. His gaze upon you is dark and intense, eyes swimming with so much emotion that it almost leaves you breathless. You pull your lip between your teeth, chewing on it nervously. Then, you take in a breath and gather the courage to utter your next words.

“You know… if I’m not working… it means I have nowhere to be tomorrow,” you breathe out as your eyes purposely flick to his bedroom. Namjoon sucks in sharp breath, almost hitching. His eyes darken slightly as he finally catches onto the meaning of your words. You watch the way his pupils dilate, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation. When he finds none, he lowers his head once again, pressing his lips against yours briefly.

Then, he takes you by the hand and leads you to his room.

A/N: My god fiNALLY! I can’t believe it took me this long to get them to bone. That being said, the next chapter will most likely be smut :))

▷ Masterlist | Chapter 9

[ashlyluvsyellow]

Bujo Tour So Far

I have been bullet journaling for years and I am going to do a simple photo dump and explanation for the pages that I have been using this year, as well as pages I have not finished.

My Future Log

I don't actually start with the index, that goes on the last page of my journal and I work my way inside so that all of my regular pages meets the index page when the journal is full.

My future log has never needed to be more then a page or two. I don't have many events and go to work at the same time daily.

Most events I know about and simply put in my phone.

It's setup with the months at the top and I go and color code based on the month. Each month gets a different color based on events but I don't color it in until I have at least two or more events.

My March calendar!

I obviously did not meet my goals for that month by posting reviews. I did however finish four books that month.

Again, I don't list out the calendar I simply do the numbers with the days of the week like a chart and write important dates in a list format.

Goals are at the bottom or on the next page.

This is why I use dotted instead of lined for my journal and I definitely don't do blank pages.

Habit and Health Tracker

My habit and health tracker is the most detailed page that I like doing but I fell off the wagon here. I go in usually once a week and color code the different habits.

I will upload some old pictures of my bujo and I will try to upload a colorful one as well in a separate post but the basic gist is that it motivates me to fill it out daily.

I track my dental health, period, journaling habit, headaches, and I am trying to get back into doing yoga three times a week but it's getting difficult.

This is also March so I am going to try and do better in April as well so stay tuned for the April update in May.

Headache Log

I track what causes my headaches. I don't follow up with this one as much but typically it is caused by hunger, like having low sugar and not eating when I am supposed to, or heat.

This has really helped me to avoid headaches as much as possible and now I typically only get them on Saturday or Sunday. Still trying to figure out that trigger but I'm working on it.

I think it's simply me not being as active on the weekends so I am starting to get out of bed at the same time during the week on the weekends as well and when it gets nicer I am going to try and go on morning walks to mitigate the headaches too.

Reading Log

This is my reading log. It's blurry but each column represents different things.

The first is the rating I am going to give the book, next is the title and author. After that each column goes over the date I started the book, finished it, genre, format, and what I did with it afterward.

I use overdrive and the library as much as I can so sometimes books get returned or sometimes I decide to buy a physical copy.

Again, I like to go in and color after gathering up some info and will try to upload some old pictures from my December to February bujo that has been mostly completed.

The last column is whether or not I uploaded a review to my storygraph profile or on the book sellers website, if I purchased it online.

Brain Dumps / Notes

These two pages are definitely what I consider my brain dump pages.

I was doing an A-Z program for stenography in March and I am currently doing another one from the Steno Project now in April to May.

I was taking notes in my bullet journal but decided to switch over to a completely separate notebook for that. Will take photos of that one for another post as well.

I also like to just list out all my ideas and to be honest this is my like third attempt at regularly blogging on the weekends.

I love reading and writing so I wanted to have a blog dedicated to both but I decided to simply have a blog and then publish my writing under a pen name instead.

This blog will be mainly about books, bujo, and lifestyle content so all my writing will go on my website and I self publish under that name.

Index

Last page of all my bullet journals now feature the index. I realized by putting it in front I would worry about running out of pages or having to have a second index.

To solve this I simply placed the index at the end and work it backwards so I never run out of pages and the content kind of meets in the middle.

It's easy to follow and I will be color coding this as well by next month.

[torixus]

"I don't like Monday," says A Lady who killed because she hates Monday, Brenda Ann Spencer

Did You Know? In 1979, A Lady Killed Two People On Monday Morning Because She Doesn't Like 'MONDAYS'.

On Monday, Jan. 29, 1979. A Beautiful young lady killed two adults and left many injured in a school environment. The reason why she committed this sinful act is because she doesn't like Mondays

- Brenda was one of the first school shooters in the United States. But why did she do that? Well . she hates Monday.

I have been arguing with myself for months about whether there is an opportunity to cover such a case, but in the end I feel that I can cover it in a way that is sensitive to the victims of the crime and who they may have been. They have been influenced by something similar in the current era. That said, it will be difficult for some of you. This is the case for Cleveland Elementary School markswoman Brenda Ann Spencer.

Early life

Branda was born on April 3, 1962 and lives in the small town of San Diego, California. Her home was across Cleveland Element Street. At 16, her parents separated and she had to stay with her father. Both were far in good condition and barely excavated. He was a troubled alcoholic and the two had to share a one-size-fits-all mattress on the living room floor.

Soon after, in 1978, Brenna entered a medical center for anxious children, hoping to save her life. It has been accommodated many times to play orderly and play for the class. While there, staff offered therapy to the girl while showing signs of suicide, but her father refused to let her go. That summer, she was arrested for stabbing the Cleveland Element window with a firearm and robbing the school.

In December of the same year, her parole officer gave her another psychiatric evaluation. Although she showed extreme signs of clinical depression, her father refused to allow her to enter any institution. To add fuel to the fire, her father bought her a .22 caliber 10/22 Ruger semi-automatic rifle. This ended with a telescope and 500 rounds of ammunition. Later in the interview, Brenda said, "I asked on the radio and he bought me a gun. I felt like he wanted me to be killed."

In this case, in particular, it seems that the favorable blame falls on the father and her reluctance to put Branda on a kind of therapy, which was offered by her conventional first officer. There were obvious signs of this in her early life disorder. According to those who knew him, he was a frequent drug user, an ordinary thief, who stopped by school every day, and was known to be quite cruel to animals. In addition, he was interested in firearms from a young age, and at 16 he was a very talented marksman.

January 29, 1979

Right on the street from her home, Brenda pulled out a .22 caliber rifle her father had given her on Christmas Day to shoot the Cleveland Element. It was 8:30 in the morning when the first shot came from a large crowd of children waiting to go to school. As the shooting continued in our direction, the faculty and children began to understand what had happened. Despite the sheer horror of the situation, Berton Vrag, principal of Cleveland Elementary School, and his guard, Mike Sayesar, played the role of the hero. The two men ran out to pick up the children near the building and were quite successful, but they would both lose their lives to Brenda. Two children died and eight others were injured, including a police officer who was shot in the neck.

The police quickly left the house, where the shots of despair went out and went out, called the house number mentioned in the address. To their surprise, a sweet 16-year-old girl replied: They asked her: "Do you know where the shots came from?" Police with riot gear stormed a demonstration on Friday, taking hundreds of protesters out by truck. "Yes, who do you think is shooting?" Later, when asked why she did this, she gave a very familiar expression that focuses on this case. "I don't like Monday. This brightens up the day."

The shooting itself took place 15 minutes before the police were able to move a garbage truck in front of the school to block more fires. After that, however, Brenda's house was closed for six hours, when the police ended, when she calmly left and turned herself in to the police. Initially, she was charged as an adult, given the seriousness of her crime, and will likely go to the "insanity" argument, but her case has never been brought to justice.

She blames herself for all the accusations. Two counts of first-degree murder and assault with a deadly weapon.  she was sentenced to 25 years in prison on probation charges after 25 years.  she was officially convicted on April 4, 1980, immediately after her 18th birthday. Despite four conditional early hearings over the years, Brenda still has her time: she will probably never be released on parole. She is currently 57 years old.

Aftermath

Brenda's work inspired many things, including various documentaries, books, and even songs. Boomtown Rats lead singer Bob Geldof wrote his song, "I don't like Monday." It topped the UK charts for over four weeks. In my personal opinion, the song is extremely little taste. Some words are on the nose, and the music video is mainly for children at school. I can't play the song here for copyright, but I'll read some more disturbing words. At first, the singer says: "And today no one will go to school / sh    e will have to force them to stay home / And Dad doesn't understand that / He always said it was as good as gold."

Within minutes of the song, there is a passage describing the shooting, which reads: "Now all the games on the field have stopped (she wants to play with toys for a while) and school is too early and we will soon learn." / Today's lesson is this: how to die / And then the bullfighter broke / And the captain clings / With problems and how and why. / And can't find a reason for it / 'There are no reasons for it / Why do you have to die, why die?'

At the moment, there seems to be no real explanation for why Brenda did what she did. she claims she was high on Angel Dust and also marijuana at the time of the shooting, but since then her toxicology reports show she was completely sober. She also claimed to have been raised by her father as a child and adolescent, but those claims were never substantiated.

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[zorualesbian]

i've been wanting to play the pokemon games but there are so many and i don't know where to start. do i have to start from the first ones? if not, then where should i start/what order should i play them in?

you don’t have to start with the first games. each game is its own self-contained story set in the same universe, so you dont need the context of the previous games and the tutorials in the beginning always go by the assumption you’ve never played a pokemon game before. there are typically some references to previous games made by nameless npcs, but it’s never anything major and if you really wanted to understand them i think it would just take a quick google search to get the full context, you wouldn’t have to go back and play an entire game or anything.

there’s not really a suggested order to play them in, but i definitely don’t mind making recommendations. ive played through all these games several times, and with the exception of firered/leafgreen, diamond/pearl/platinum, and heartgold/soulsilver i’ve played through them within the past 2 years. so my memory is relatively fresh.

first of all, i’m not going to recommend you anything that’s had a remake. i love the classic games and i feel like they were a wonderful starting point for a fantastic series, but theyre not a great starting point. i play them for the nostalgia because i grew up playing pokemon since the first generation, my wife didn’t really play pokemon until the fourth generation and only enjoys the classic games because she already loves pokemon. compared to newer games, theyre just not that fun if you don’t already have a lot of nostalgia/love of pokemon in general. 

also a quick note about which versions you should pick--it honestly doesn’t matter. they’re the same game, but there’s a small handful of pokemon that’ll appear in one version and not the other. sometimes i choose by which pokemon on the box art i like best and sometimes i choose by going to serebii and looking at the version exclusives list. its really up to you and your preferences, and it doesn’t matter that much either way

Sun and Moon/Ultra Sun and Ultra Moonthese are definitely the ones i’d suggest starting with, they’re the most beginner-friendly by far. there’s a new feature that tells you if your opponent is weak or resistant to your moves if it’s a pokemon you’ve fought before, which is great because now you don’t have to mentally keep track of the type matchup chart and the individual types of 800+ pokemon! your pokedex also shows you if a pokemon is part of a pair or has evolutions, so you won’t make mistakes i made when i was a kid where i assumed some of my pokemon didn’t have evolutions and didn’t train them and missed out on some cool pokemon as a result. story-wise, they’re my favorite so far and have done the best job of fleshing out and developing their characters.

as for whether you should play sun/moon or ultra sun/ultra moon, i’m not sure. the ultra versions have a few new pokemon, new areas, new moves, and an “enhanced” story, which is basically the same as the old story but deeper this time (and while i haven’t finished it, i’m enjoying it a lot). but the “new” things aren’t that many and i think whats giving me so much appreciation of the ultra story is the fact that ive already played through sun/moon, but that might just be me. it’s probably better to go with the ultra version because it has much more content for about the same price, but original sun/moon are still good choices if you have your heart set on those.

Omega Ruby/Alpha Sapphiretheyre remakes of the third generation games ruby/sapphire and imo they lived up to the hype. ruby/sapphire were fan favorites and so are or/as. they aren’t really difficult because the games that came out right before this introduced an item that lets your entire party gain exp from a battle even if they didn’t participate, and while or/as are more balanced for this item than the game that introduced it, they still arent quite all the way there. personally i don’t mind it, i think these games are enjoyable regardless of if they’re challenging or not, but you’re free to turn the item on/off as you want to make it as easy or as difficult as you want.

X/Yhoo boy. i actually don’t like x/y. they had bad pacing, the story barely held itself together, and this is the game where the exp share was introduced and if you never turn it off, your pokemon get way overlevel and you can effortlessly breeze through the game. but they’re pretty, and i think the fact that theyre ridiculously easy might make them more enjoyable for new players because it’s the perfect chance to just build a team of pokemon you like instead of worrying about strength or team composition. plus, this is the first game to have character customization and you get enough money through the course of the game that buying all the clothes is easy.

Black/White and Black 2/White 2black and white are by far my favorite pokemon games, and black 2 and white 2 are the only direct sequels to a previous game so you should probably wait until after playing b/w to worry about b2/w2. i really enjoyed the story and this was the first time i actually got heavily invested in the characters because until this point, most characters in pokemon games felt pretty flat and one-dimensional. the one complaint i have is how exp scales based on your level. the concept itself is fine, but it feels like the scaling is extreme and there’s a lot of exp you start to lose just by going up a single level, which makes grinding a massive pain. but grinding isnt really required, so it’s nothing to worry about unless you’re determined to be overlevel.

HeartGold/SoulSilverremakes of the second generation games gold/silver and another huge favorite of mine, but arguably also a direct sequel to red/blue. they don’t lean heavily on red/blue but when they were initially designed they were called pokemon 2 and were intended to be the last games, so unlike other games it begins with the assumption you’ve already played the previous game. but the tutorials are still available and neither gold/silver nor red/blue are very story-heavy in the first place, because this is when the series was still finding its footing. i think theyre perfectly fine to play through with no context, but i can understand if you’d prefer to skip them for now. i very much enjoyed having my pokemon walk around with me all the time, the environments are beautiful, and hg/ss has the most useful use of the DS’s bottom screen.

Diamond/Pearl/Platinumok i know i listed diamond/pearl but that’s just because they deserve a mention. platinum is the enhanced version, and unless you see a pokemon thats exclusive to diamond/pearl and you REALLY want it, you should play platinum. that being said, i don’t actually like these games that much. they made improvements to the gameplay that have stayed through the current generations and provided deep lore about the pokemon universe and had a killer ost and a fun underground mining mini game, but outside of those the game always felt really lackluster to me and even as a kid i had a hard time getting invested in it. i think it was level design and difficulty curve that put me off so much but since i havent played them in so long i can’t say that for sure. overall, i’d say they’re worth playing at least for the lore because it’s very good and very important, but probably only if you already like pokemon. theyre not great first games.

FireRed/LeafGreeni’m only listing these because they’re currently the most updated way to play the first generation (red/blue) but they’re older than anything else on this list. stat calculations are different. movesets are different. and both of those are a bad different, not good or even neutral. they did a good job of providing extra tutorials, but overall theyre just completely outdated and suffering from red/blue’s bad layout and level design. i’m hoping these are the next games we get remakes of (remake of a remake sounds ridiculous, but these games are seriously getting close to 15 years old) but until then i’d really only suggest playing them if you already love pokemon and just want to see older games in the series.

[torixus]

"I don't like Monday," says A Lady who killed because she hates Monday, Brenda Ann Spencer

Did You Know? In 1979, A Lady Killed Two People On Monday Morning Because She Doesn't Like 'MONDAYS'.

On Monday, Jan. 29, 1979. A Beautiful young lady killed two adults and left many injured in a school environment. The reason why she committed this sinful act is because she doesn't like Mondays

- Brenda was one of the first school shooters in the United States. But why did she do that? Well . she hates Monday.

I have been arguing with myself for months about whether there is an opportunity to cover such a case, but in the end I feel that I can cover it in a way that is sensitive to the victims of the crime and who they may have been. They have been influenced by something similar in the current era. That said, it will be difficult for some of you. This is the case for Cleveland Elementary School markswoman Brenda Ann Spencer.

Early life

Branda was born on April 3, 1962 and lives in the small town of San Diego, California. Her home was across Cleveland Element Street. At 16, her parents separated and she had to stay with her father. Both were far in good condition and barely excavated. He was a troubled alcoholic and the two had to share a one-size-fits-all mattress on the living room floor.

Soon after, in 1978, Brenna entered a medical center for anxious children, hoping to save her life. It has been accommodated many times to play orderly and play for the class. While there, staff offered therapy to the girl while showing signs of suicide, but her father refused to let her go. That summer, she was arrested for stabbing the Cleveland Element window with a firearm and robbing the school.

In December of the same year, her parole officer gave her another psychiatric evaluation. Although she showed extreme signs of clinical depression, her father refused to allow her to enter any institution. To add fuel to the fire, her father bought her a .22 caliber 10/22 Ruger semi-automatic rifle. This ended with a telescope and 500 rounds of ammunition. Later in the interview, Brenda said, "I asked on the radio and he bought me a gun. I felt like he wanted me to be killed."

In this case, in particular, it seems that the favorable blame falls on the father and her reluctance to put Branda on a kind of therapy, which was offered by her conventional first officer. There were obvious signs of this in her early life disorder. According to those who knew him, he was a frequent drug user, an ordinary thief, who stopped by school every day, and was known to be quite cruel to animals. In addition, he was interested in firearms from a young age, and at 16 he was a very talented marksman.

January 29, 1979

Right on the street from her home, Brenda pulled out a .22 caliber rifle her father had given her on Christmas Day to shoot the Cleveland Element. It was 8:30 in the morning when the first shot came from a large crowd of children waiting to go to school. As the shooting continued in our direction, the faculty and children began to understand what had happened. Despite the sheer horror of the situation, Berton Vrag, principal of Cleveland Elementary School, and his guard, Mike Sayesar, played the role of the hero. The two men ran out to pick up the children near the building and were quite successful, but they would both lose their lives to Brenda. Two children died and eight others were injured, including a police officer who was shot in the neck.

The police quickly left the house, where the shots of despair went out and went out, called the house number mentioned in the address. To their surprise, a sweet 16-year-old girl replied: They asked her: "Do you know where the shots came from?" Police with riot gear stormed a demonstration on Friday, taking hundreds of protesters out by truck. "Yes, who do you think is shooting?" Later, when asked why she did this, she gave a very familiar expression that focuses on this case. "I don't like Monday. This brightens up the day."

The shooting itself took place 15 minutes before the police were able to move a garbage truck in front of the school to block more fires. After that, however, Brenda's house was closed for six hours, when the police ended, when she calmly left and turned herself in to the police. Initially, she was charged as an adult, given the seriousness of her crime, and will likely go to the "insanity" argument, but her case has never been brought to justice.

She blames herself for all the accusations. Two counts of first-degree murder and assault with a deadly weapon.  she was sentenced to 25 years in prison on probation charges after 25 years.  she was officially convicted on April 4, 1980, immediately after her 18th birthday. Despite four conditional early hearings over the years, Brenda still has her time: she will probably never be released on parole. She is currently 57 years old.

Aftermath

Brenda's work inspired many things, including various documentaries, books, and even songs. Boomtown Rats lead singer Bob Geldof wrote his song, "I don't like Monday." It topped the UK charts for over four weeks. In my personal opinion, the song is extremely little taste. Some words are on the nose, and the music video is mainly for children at school. I can't play the song here for copyright, but I'll read some more disturbing words. At first, the singer says: "And today no one will go to school / sh    e will have to force them to stay home / And Dad doesn't understand that / He always said it was as good as gold."

Within minutes of the song, there is a passage describing the shooting, which reads: "Now all the games on the field have stopped (she wants to play with toys for a while) and school is too early and we will soon learn." / Today's lesson is this: how to die / And then the bullfighter broke / And the captain clings / With problems and how and why. / And can't find a reason for it / 'There are no reasons for it / Why do you have to die, why die?'

At the moment, there seems to be no real explanation for why Brenda did what she did. she claims she was high on Angel Dust and also marijuana at the time of the shooting, but since then her toxicology reports show she was completely sober. She also claimed to have been raised by her father as a child and adolescent, but those claims were never substantiated.

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