#i don't get to choose what my brain wants to listen

[utopiastri]

Put That Guy in a SituationTM - look something about Landoscar in a 20/32 type situation has me hooked….trying to not let others on to their predicament, maybe it’s a bit embarrassing how it happened ���

hi anon!!! thank you for the prompt! i went a smidge away from my usual cutesy fluff for this one - your suggestion of embarrassment really sparked something in my brain, even if i took it in a slightly different direction. i hope you enjoy!!!

(prompt list here)

“Look, we just gotta act natural,” Lando says.

Or, well, Lando-as-Oscar says, because it sounds like Oscar’s voice and it’s Oscar’s mouth that’s moving, but it’s Lando that’s actually saying the words and–

Lando-in-Oscar’s-body huffs. “You’re having a crisis again aren’t you?”

“You know it’s weirder of you to be 100% ok with this.”

“It’s a body swap curse, mate, it’s not rocket science.”

Oscar runs a hand through his hair and cringes at the uncanny feeling of there being someone else’s hair on top of his head. “I understand the concept, Lando, what I’m struggling with is everything else related to it like, I don't know, how the fuck this happened."

“I don’t know. Do you reckon we need to have sex to break the curse?”

“What?” Oscar squawks, “Why would we need to have sex to break the curse?”

Lando flushes. “I dunno. Just felt like the right solution.”

“Based on what?”

Lando mumbles something about seeing it online once and Oscar chooses to ask no more follow-up questions lest Lando tells him he learnt about it from some random porn he watched once. He heaves a sigh.

“Listen, like you said, we should just act normal. This whole thing is,” Oscar pauses to search for the right word, “Strange. And I’d really rather not bring anyone else into it to begin with.”

“Agreed,” Lando says before adding, “Hey, if we’re still like this for the race tomorrow and I win but in your body, does that mean you get the points?” Oscar glares at him and Lando pouts. “It’s a genuine question!” he whines.

Oscar’s about to point out they have bigger things to focus on than the effects of this on a race when Jon sticks his head into the room.

“Debrief in five, guys.”

“Sounds good, mate,” Lando says, in an accent no human being has ever used before.

Jon blinks at him. He turns to look at Oscar. Or, rather, he turns to look at Oscar who he thinks is Lando. Oscar smiles weakly.

“He’s, uh, trying to do an impression of me doing an Australian impression," Oscar lies, hoping it sounds vaguely believable.

“Oi!” Lando says, “My Australian accent’s mint.”

“Yes, Oscar,” Oscar says pointedly, “Your Australian accent would be mint because you are from Australia.”

Lando's eyes light up in realisation and he starts nodding furiously. “Right, yep, what he said, exactly.”

Jon blinks at both of them this time. He sighs.

“If you two are doing roleplay, I don’t want to hear about it.” Lando and Oscar both start spluttering, but Jon keeps on talking over both of them. “Just be on time for debrief.”

With Jon gone, Oscar breathes a sigh of relief. Or he starts to, until Lando pipes up.

“I still reckon us having sex will fix it.”

Oscar reminds himself that if he kills Lando right now, he’s possibly going to do irreparable damage to his own body.

The thought’s still tempting.

“Is there a particular reason you’re so desperate to have sex with yourself?” he asks, eyebrow raised.

Lando clearly wasn't expecting that question because he freezes. Oscar’s always hated how easily he flushes but right now, watching it brutally incriminate Lando, he can’t help but be grateful for it.

“I’m not fucking desperate to have sex with myself.” He doesn't sound like he's lying, but the blush on his face suggests he's not telling the whole truth.

Maybe…

His eyebrows raise. “So you’re only desperate to have sex with me then?”

Lando looks up at Oscar, eyes wide. He swallows.

Got you, Oscar thinks to himself.

[nope-astrology-nope]

Rules: 🎶✨when u get this u have to put 5 songs u actually listen to, publish. then, send this ask/tag 10 of your favorite followers (non-negotiable, positivity is cool) 🎶

Thank you dear @asdfghjklmpff ♥ but I am about to concoct the weirdest ass playlist ever in history. Because here's the thing, I already mentioned that the music I listen to depends on what I'm writing at the moment, and Yes, I Am Writing At The Moment, it's been some time since I last wrote consistently and it finally came back, so right now I'm listening almost exclusively to Ethel Cain and Daughter, BUT, I do go to youtube and play some random songs a couple times a day, and those songs are: (only 4 sorry)

Moscas en la casa - Shakira

2. Through The Roof 'n' Underground - Gogol Bordello

3. Sinkin' Soon - Norah Jones

4. Thoroughfare - Ethel Cain (this beautiful live version)

I tag @rayesworld, @ephemeral-eternity, @boneopera, @not-shark and whoever else wants to do it!

[skrunksthatwunk]

idk if i've discussed it before (i have certainly THOUGHT about it) but someone on my kuwa suffering ep 89 comp mentioned it and i just had to go off about it like. ok. sensui tells yusuke something along the lines of "you heard itsuki" when itsuki's inside the uraotoko, implying that not only can sensui hear those inside the uraotoko, but that he expects yusuke to be able to as well. which means that yusuke Almost Certainly Heard And Kind Of Ignored kuwabara's prolonged mental breakdown and wailing about how much he needs yusuke to live etc. which. guHHH i hate him yusuke you ass but also listen.

the only acknowledgement yusuke gives to this (if any) is when he says something like "sensui you're sooo fucking cooked this plan's going perfectly (my friends are going to get strong and kill you when i die)." he's trash talking to sensui, ignoring the others because, i think, he doesn't want to acknowledge what he's doing to them.

yusuke is explicitly recreating the experience he had with kuwabara's "death" at the hands of toguro, complete with the announcement of intent (and power) to kill, the inability to impede the threat in any way (barring a power-breakthrough), and the target in some way racing towards/volunteering for their death. yusuke learns through doing, and through tough love-style approaches. it's only effective if it hurts. watching kuwabara die like that was devastating to yusuke, but it sure as hell fucking worked. he beat toguro because of that maneuver. so even if he has to (re-)traumatize his friends in the process, this method will make his friends stronger, and he feels confident in that. but he never had to live with the consequences of kuwabara's death, not really. that's something hiei makes clear before they enter the cave as well, that there are no fake-outs ready to make him or anyone else stronger. the only deaths here will be real. the only power gained will come at a high, permanent cost. hiei's warning is an attempt to keep everyone alive, to keep yusuke from being stupid. and then yusuke decides to take that fatality into his own hands, but it's kind of his friends who would pay the price. he's going to make them live through the days, months, years without him, the actual permanency of loss (assuming they survive for that long), something he never experienced with kuwabara (a new facet of that traumatic scenario), AND he's escaping the emotional fallout of this choice through death. he doesn't have to see them mourn, won't get yelled at, won't watch them fail to move on. he's tapping out and choosing to believe they'll be fine.

but i think he feels guilty. just a little. i mean, yusuke couldn't even believe that people cared about him enough to want him alive in episode one. he's staked everything on his friends, which means he still kind of... doesn't value his own life, at least not compared to theirs. but he believes his friends love him and want him around, and we know that because he has to, or else he wouldn't make a plan that depends entirely on that love. he is actively leveraging the care he doesn't think he deserves, trying to hurt them in a way he is intimately familiar with (only worse), for.... what, exactly?

this is kind of my sticking point tbh. i don't think the answer is... super clear, but let's start with what it's not.

yusuke is not doing this because it is the most practical way to save all of humanity; that would be the mafukan, which he stopped. it could be a gamble to save all of his friends? the mafukan strategy would guarantee koenma's death/eternal imprisonment, whereas this strategy gambles all of humanity on the chance that his friends come out of the Easy Break Oven strong enough to avert the end of the world. if the sacrifice of even one friend is completely intolerable, perhaps he'd accept those slim odds and their steep consequences. yusuke tends to take risks like that, especially when he's got fight-induced tunnel vision. he doesn't think things through too much; his schemes are usually dependent on surprising his enemy enough to oneshot them. truthfully, i think this is the closest we'll get to an answer, and it's a more conventional one for this kind of story. but there is another layer i haven't been able to get from my mind.

i think yusuke is gifting each of his friends an honorable warrior's death.

so, in case it needs saying, yusuke, kuwabara, kurama, and hiei all (at least once, if not several times) exhibit a desire to die in combat in a way they deem noble to give their lives purpose (usually by self-sacrifice, but sometimes by another metric of honor, like hiei's duel with shigure and his desire to die in mutual defeat against an evenly matched opponent; or even kurama's decision to fight shigure in his human form, displaying a sort of passive suicidality via placing being true to himself in this (somewhat symbolic/inconsequential) way over survival). they need to make their lives count for something, because they feel guilty for being alive (kurama and hiei feel guilty for their past actions (hiei's is most evident in his distance from yukina, though that's not its primary reason), hiei, kuwabara, and yusuke have all been ostracized and made to feel like burdens on/unwanted by their caregivers and general society; all four of them have felt profound isolation even from their loved ones (yusuke and hiei are rather obvious; kurama can never tell his mother about the majority of his life nor what she truly means to him in the context of it; and kuwabara is separated from his peers for his spiritual awareness and his "stupidity" (plus his parents aren't around? and he is Desperate to define manhood/manliness through a broader pop cultural one which includes the warrior sacrifice thing bc he has no male role models BUT that's for another post) (i will admit kuwa's the most tenuous one here irt isolation)). they want to die for a cause so badly it's actually physically painful to me. it is passive suicidality, and they define their lives and identities by their relation to, engagement with, and skill at doing violence, etc. they live to die by the sword. anyway. nobody talks about it but i think it's very important to understanding what yusuke's doing here.

because i think he knows that about himself and his friends. they're kindred spirits. at the very least he knows this about kuwabara, who literally made a speech about this before diving into toguro's fingers In The Event That He Is Recreating Explicitly. he is dying nobly like they all want to on the chance that they'll get to break out and fight sensui rather than dying without even getting to take a swing. it's about his pride and theirs. but i don't think yusuke necessarily believes they'll win. he knows better than anyone how strong sensui is, and how wide the gap is between sensui and team urameshi. his stated position that humanity is doomed and that he doesn't care about its fate is, i think, not completely genuine, but if we take it at face value, he's not killing himself so that his friends can survive the end of the world. something's going to come around and kill them eventually. he's doing it so they can survive long enough to fight sensui. he needs them (specifically kuwabara) to be strong enough to free themselves to begin round two. but he's given up on their side winning, on humanity surviving, on his own victory---why should he think his friends are capable of winning? this could be another case of yusuke's fight-blinders. it could be another gamble, more blind faith put in his friends. but honestly it reads more to me that yusuke's giving them a chance to die together on the battlefield. them winning would be great, but it's not his goal. it's a pipe dream.

he knows he's going to be killed. they're probably going to be killed, too. but to make it so they last a little longer against sensui, to make the odds a little more even, so they are killed not like livestock, but like worthy fighters, he'd die a little faster. it's the best kind of death someone like them can have; and he'll deprive himself of it just to make their ends a little sweeter. even if the road to that is far more bitter.

but it's not like yusuke's friends know what he's thinking or agree to it, and he can't exactly make his case for it in the moment. he's making that choice for them. whatever his intentions, whatever odds he thinks they have of beating sensui, he's kind of sealing all of their fates. so how the hell is he supposed to acknowledge kuwabara screaming at him not to die, trying desperately to express what yusuke means to him in what could be their final moments together? this plan is going to hurt his friends terribly. it is already doing so, and he can hear it. his choices to stop koenma from using the mafukan and to die for his friends' strength are both selfish in some way, no matter how you read the scene. if yusuke comforts kuwabara, he might not get strong enough. if he twists the knife, well... how could he forgive himself? and either way by responding he would have to face them all and say yes, i'm doing this regardless of your feelings (with the intention of hurting you). so i think he does what he often does. he avoids it. he lets that emotion glance off him and his bravado and his one-liners so he doesn't have to deal with the fact that he's hurting people, that he's scared and guilty and unsure of himself. that he's about to die again, about to put kuwabara through the grief he saw at his wake again, only worse; about to put his quieter friends through something similar.

yusuke is confronted with the responsibility one has to the people who care for them, and he runs from it in an attempt to give them some small peace. just like when he died before and thought hey, at least my mom and keiko won't be burdened by me anymore. because the only thing he can really do for them is die.

[gibbearish]

kinda frustrating how we've spent the last few months acknowledging how a lot of well intentioned but guilt trippy social justice posts are like specifically designed to worm into ocd ppls brains and then now every single post abt palestine is "i dont care how bad your mental health is, i dont care how bad looking at all this makes you feel, if you don't read every single post you see on this topic in full you are a horrible person and directly contributing to their deaths. 'waaaah my mental health' well at least youre not being bombed, did you think about that??" and its like. i absolutely get where youre coming from but you dont get to complain that guilt tripping is bad then turn around and use it anyways because you think the cause youre using it for is worthwhile. like. everyone thinks the cause theyre using it for is worthwhile, thats why theyre using it. but its still a shit way to do it

[leadendeath]

mate. im sitting in the confessional right now with this.

i have a "guilty ?pleasure?"- well, not pleasure exactly, it's just something to background listen to while i do other stuff... so that i don't have to look at the show's art style which i generally do not like much- maybe a better term is a "bad habit"- of putting on peoples' reviews/video essays of the works of someone whose name sounds a lot like "fizziepop".

and let me tell ya.

the combo of the double take/"oh no he's cute" feeling i got when i saw this guy.

i have too much of a mental sickness for this they can't be doing this to me man. i almost had a moment of "......hmmmmaybe i could give the show a try 🤔" weakness. can u guess why. take a guess. a wild one.

help me.

[bunny-jpeg]

how can i take your order? all you have to do is pick a dessert, drink and driver/character of your choosing! are you in the mood for a mille-feuille or a big slice of chocolate cake! please, please, please indicate who you want me to write about!!

the servers are from the following: formula one, call of duty, baldur's gate 3, haikyuu, one piece, jujustu kaisen, detective comics (dc), marvel comics (but i am open to any other fandoms you might have in mind! please do not hesitate to ask!!)

i do also accept polyam relationships! (pairing + reader), up to about four people! just to make it manageable on my end!

all orders can be made to the inbox for @bunny-jpeg and i'll get your order together asap! also let me know if you want it extra sweet or a little more spicy !

mille-feuille: “that’s it, fuck, that’s a good girl.”

butter tart: "let's ruin ourselves for anyone else."

sugar pie: “gonna let daddy hear ya?”

zebra cake: "well, what do we have here?"

carrot cake: "swallow it. all of it."

millionaire shortcake: "if they saw you now, you'd be the biggest shame to your family."

pots de crème: "if a picture is worth a thousand words, then i could probably get a million dollars for this photo."

oat flapjacks: "i'm not scared of you."

persian rolls: "it's mandatory i finish. you getting to finish is a treat."

spice pie: "i didn't know it was possible to be a liar and a slut."

mushroom pie: "if you don't shut up. i'm going to shut you up."

lemon slice: "i'm sorry, what was that? i can’t hear you over all that noise you’re making."

swiss roll: "everything you own, everything you wear i paid for. so i guess that means i own you."

pumpkin pie: "i've met strays who were more obedient."

pastry braid: "your job is to make me cum. now get to work."

sausage roll: "i wonder how much i could get for photos of this cunt."

pithivier: "if you don't behave, i'll let the boys take care of you."

tiramisu: “my little slut to ruin.”

sponge toffee: "aw, is someone mad that they can only cum because of me?"

pull-apart bread: "i love you"

powered sugar donuts: "marry me."

blueberry bars: “gonna make you a mamma and you're gonna make me a daddy.”

pudding chomeur: "i don't share."

ice cream bars: “did you see the way he was eyeing you? he need to know you're mine."

chocolate cake: "do you feel that? that's what happens when i think about you all day."

soufflé: "i'll be gentle."

fried dough: "i know virginity is a stupid concept... but i want to take yours."

apple pie: "now be good and beg. thank you."

vanilla cheesecake: "where are your manners?"

berry trifle: "wrong. try again."

maple cream pie: "either you wear the necklace with my name on it, or wear my bruises around your neck."

s'more: "The accent gets to you, doesn't it?"

belgian waffles: "i cum in that every night."

pancakes: "if you bite me. i'll bite you back."

loaf of whole wheat bread: "you're going to shut that mouth and take me."

jos louis: "does someone need a daddy?"

maple taffy: "oh my god you're stupid."

snowballs: "don't worry, drug tests aren't till next week."

shortbread cookies: "and who does this belong to?"

flan: "i'm not possessive... i'm obsessive."

peach cake: "if you spill a drop, we start all over."

angel food cake: "if he fucks with me again, i'm finishing inside of you."

red velvet cupcake: "if you don't like being called a whore, then stop acting like one."

mince pie: "i'm not jealous."

banana bread: "i'm going to fuck that sweet pussy of yours until the only word your little brain can form is my name."

crumb cake: "if you just listened, all of this could've been avoided."

chocolate chip cookies: "you're beautiful when you smile, but you're the prettiest when my cock is in your throat"

nanaimo bars: "who's my pretty girl? c'mon say it."

coffee cake: "knees. now."

sourdough bread: "i'm going to breed you."

blueberry muffins: "i don't think it'll fit."

pound cake with strawberries: "you know i hate going over rules, but just because i like seeing you embarrassed, i'll tell you them again."

croissant: "i wonder if your father knows what happens during the off hours. if he knows you're here with me."

crepe: "pretty girl."

french toast: "you're trying to make me jealous!"

churros: "if you don't shut that little mouth of yours, i will stuff it full. okay?"

shortbread squares: "you're just mad that that my cock fits perfectly in you now. must be a blow to the ego that we're a perfect match."

savory pastry: "let your brother find out."

sweet pastry: "i'll make it all better."

eclairs: "the family's precious little girl. under me like a slut."

boston cream pie: "yeah, i'll use protection."

bagel: “gonna paint you with my teeth.”

crostata: “stupid slut, this is what you wanted huh? wanted me to fuck you like i hate you.”

tres leches: "i wonder if your brother know i cum in you."

peanut butter bars: “scratch me, bite me, just mark me sweetheart. show them I’m yours.”

eton mess: "be careful. your breath smells like cum."

scones: "but what if they see us!"

english muffin: "aw, is someone crying?"

honey cruller: "i forget how small you are sometimes."

banana split: "don't look at me like that."

beer brownies: "stick your tongue out anymore and you'll look like a dog."

fudge: "your father is pissing me off."

sticky toffee pudding: "the only way this is ending is you getting pregnant."

hot cross buns: "don't hide your face from me. i'd hate to have to tie you up."

brownies: "you're so much more agreeable when you have something to occupy that mouth of yours."

chocolate mousse: "the only necklace you need is my hand around your throat"

tim bits: "stupid little thing."

fruitcake: "i'll make tonight special."

cornmeal muffin: "i need you most."

devil's food cake: "you're my most unhealthy obsession."

crème caramel: "oh. you thought you were getting away from me?"

banana & chocolate muffins: "i'm only doing this because you need to learn how to behave, rules are rules, and you need to follow them."

custard tart: "i've never done this before."

cinnamon rolls: "no one needs to know."

mango sorbet: "you are by far the dumbest thing i've ever fucked. how did they even let you graduate?"

date squares: "you look better with my marks on you."

figgy duff: "if i buy it, will you stop pouting?"

spicy upside down cake: "let's play a game: don't get caught."

cream puffs: "let me finish inside."

profiteroles: "come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go."

with a side of:

coffee: rivals

tea: semi-public/public sex

juice: cockwarming

mocha coffee: breeding kink

bubble tea: daddy kink

a vodka shot: rough sex

sparkling water: gentle sex

coconut water: alternate universe

energy drink: doggy style

champagne: sugar daddy situation

hard lemonade: possessive behaviour

espresso shot: dirty talking

a glass of wine: cowgirl position

ice capp coffee: werewolf au

bloody mary: vampire au

martini: mafia au

frozen latte: dumbification

frozen lemonade: consensual non-consent

cranberry juice: mean!character

glass of water: aftercare

chocolate milk: tenderness

milkshake: size kink

pina colada: pregnancy

cider: body worship

mai tai: loss of virginity

margarita: unprotected sex

mint julep: punishments

chai: biting/hickies

earl grey: big cock

fishbowl cocktail: protected sex

tonic water: age gap

matcha latte: collars/bondage

root beer: filming/recording

soda: jealousy

americano: oral sex

whisky: degrading language

vitamin water: dom/sub dynamic

irish coffee: high sex

sangria: drunk sex

dark roast coffee: sub!character

dark hot chocolate: sub!reader

iced tea: accidentally launching relationship

lemon water: university/college au

naked & famous: bimbo/ditzy!reader

on the house: author's choice!

ORDER UP!

[laligraves]

a wedding in june

cult leader!joel miller x virgin fem!reader

[18+] | wc: ~3.2k summary: You run from Joel on your wedding day. masterlist | AO3

warnings: HBO Joel, TLOU AU, dubious consent (i'm so serious don't read if it makes you uncomfortable), some proofreading, post-outbreak, commune/cult vibes, arranged marriage, mentions of infected/gore/violence, no use of y/n or too many details on reader's appearance, some face slapping, loss of virginity (and some pain associated to that but only a few sentences), outdoors sex, oral (f! receiving), squirting, unprotected sex, creampie

a/n: i promise i have other ideas rattling in my brain besides dubious consent 😭 i have a whole wip chart with tons of ideas that i hope i can write

You run faster at the sound of shouts behind you. Sweat drips down your temples and fear makes your heart beat erratically, but you don’t dare stop. 

The outer gates are only a few more hundred feet away. All you need to do is get past the trees and you’ll be able to escape. You don’t have time to think about how this will be your first time venturing outside of the commune. 

Everything you were taught about the outside, about the orphaned souls and monsters that lurk, none of that matters. Not when you’re more terrified at what your future will bring.

Joel Miller. The man who in just a few months, cleared away the hundreds of infected in the nearby valley. Joel, who in the commune’s monthly hunting trips, manages to find everything from venison to medication. 

The times you’ve been close enough to Joel, to feel the heat emanating off his body, you can almost taste the violence that simmers beneath his skin. Instead of it scaring you, like it would any sane person, it excites you. 

The longing in his gaze whenever he looks at you makes you dizzy. There’s a pulse of heat between your thighs each and every time, one that will only go away after you ride your pillow until exhaustion. Whenever you face him again, after you’ve dreamed of him taking you, you wonder if he knows what you do in the privacy of your room. 

There’s no denying that he’s saved this commune from the brink of starvation. Of course everyone, including you, is grateful for the kindness of a stranger. But in the months he’s been here, their gratitude has turned into pure devotion. 

Your parents practically pushed you into his arms the moment Joel asked about you. Normally quite level headed, your parents have begun to treat Joel like a God. You thought Joel would find their insistence of marriage off putting, that he would be an honorable man and let you choose your own path in this place.  

You were wrong. 

Your parents saw it as an honor that out of all the women in the commune, Joel chose you. The books and pretty dresses he finds on his trips are only a sign of how devoted a husband he will be, at least that’s what your mother tried to tell you.  

And the times you tried to speak to Joel and get him to rethink this marriage? Don’t worry about it, pretty girl, was all he would say before he’d send you off. 

You can imagine him in your bed and fantasize about him in your dreams, but to be his wife? Especially now that he’s been chosen to lead the commune—you want nothing to do with that. 

A denser path to your right has you changing directions, wishing to throw them off your trail. You can still make it if you run through here. 

Except it’s too late. Strong arms grab and push you into the lush grass. 

“No,” you scream, “let me go!” 

“What’s wrong with you,” Joel snaps, “don’t you know what’s out there?” 

“I don’t care,” you scream out childishly, “I’d rather be out there than be with you!” 

He climbs on top of you, grabbing your wrists in one hand and pressing them above your head into the grass. He leans on your thighs to keep you still and grabs your chin with the other hand. 

“Listen to me,” he insists, “you don’t know what you’re sayin’. You know nothin’ of what life is like outside these walls.” 

He digs his fingers into your cheeks and shakes your head slightly since you refuse to look at him. 

“Joel, did you find her?” your father calls out from a distance. 

“Yeah, I got ‘er.” 

“Great, let’s go back and finish the celebration–” 

“No,” Joel calls out. 

“Joel–” 

“Leave,” Joel interrupts. 

He continues sitting on you, putting most of his weight on your trembling body. The white dress you're wearing, a satin piece that he found on their last hunting trip into the town, rides up dangerously close to your panties. 

“I need to teach you a lesson in respect, wife,” Joel growls. 

He stands and just when you think you can escape again, he yanks you up with him. Joel holds your arm tight with one hand while taking off his belt with the other. He spins you around and brings your wrists behind your back, using the belt to bind them together. 

“You wanna see what’s out there? Since you think you’re so tough?” Joel asks, not waiting for an answer and instead dragging you to the gate. “I do everything to make this place safe for you, darlin’. But this is how you repay me? Runnin’ off at the first chance you get?” 

You’re surprised at his words and the sincerity of his voice. He sounds almost… sad. 

“Practically beggin’ to be out there with those fuckers instead of me?” he continues, “The only man who can truly protect you?” 

You reach the gate and your heartbeat picks up again. You’ve never been out this far. In fact, you’re acres away from the actual commune. While the gates are secure and regularly enforced, you can’t help but feel truly terrified that something will grab you just outside these barriers.  

“I’m sorry, Joel–” 

He stops, spinning you around and landing a hard slap, slap, slap on your ass. 

“You address me as sir.”

“I’m sorry, sir,” you cry out, “I learned my lesson. Let’s–let’s go back.” 

Joel ignores you, choosing instead to march you right to the gate. He keeps one hand on your arm and uses the other to maneuver the many locks and wires on the barrier door until it finally opens. 

“No, please! I said I was sorry! I wasn’t thinking!” 

He drags you out and for the first time in your life, you’ve left the commune. Despite only a metal gate separating both sides, this area seems devoid of life. 

He walks and walks until you wonder if you’ll pass out from the panic. You fall to your knees and Joel crouches right in front of you. 

“Your daddy ever tell you about the infected?” Joel whispers, tilting your chin up with his index finger. “How they’ll bite and rip into any part of your flesh.” 

“No, please,” you whimper. 

He drags a finger down your neck and over your exposed collarbones, leaving goosebumps in his wake. Your nipples tighten as he glides his finger over one breast and then the other. 

“Once they’re done with you, if there’s anything left, then you become just as mindless and violent as them. Forever lost–” 

“Sir–” 

His hand tightens around your neck, cutting off your words. 

“It’s not just one, babydoll. They like to travel in hordes. Makes it easier to find their victims.” 

Your air supply thins and blood rushes to your ears. You squeeze your thighs unconsciously as the pulsing between them only grows. Joel ghosts his lips over yours and your eyes flutter closed without thinking. 

“But it’s not just them,” he whispers over your lips, “there’s non-infected out there. People who won’t think twice about hurtin’ a pretty girl like you. Killin’ ya’ just for fun.” 

You’re not sure who kisses who first. It’s not the chaste kiss the two of you shared at the altar. It’s rough and has you pressing your body close to his so you can take every swipe of his tongue or bite from his teeth. He continues holding your neck, lightly squeezing so you have no other choice than to gasp for air. 

You fall back at the push of his hand on your chest. He flips you on your side to untie his belt from your wrists. You attack the moment your hands are free, sliding your hands through his salt and pepper hair and tugging him down.

Joel hisses but returns each of your kisses and bites with his own. You hear the squawk of a crow from above and you're immediately reminded of where you are. 

“Wait, sir,” you gasp, “not here. Take me back to your–our house–” 

He drags his teeth down your neck, rubbing his beard into your soft skin and biting down. 

“Thought you’d rather be out here than with me?” he says, repeating your words from earlier.  

“No,” you whimper, trying to push him off, “not here. I–” 

He reaches your chest and sucks your nipple into his mouth right over your dress. Your words are cut off and you're arching your back, trying to push more into his mouth. 

Joel makes room between your thighs and grinds down as you twist his wavy strands of hair between your fingers. His hard bulge rubs over your pussy and your whimper at the roughness.

He pinches your other nipple between two fingers then leans back to tug down the straps of your dress. Warm, summer wind glides over your now naked breasts and you shiver. 

“Look at these pretty tits,” he groans, “all mine.” 

Joel yanks the skirt of the dress over your tummy and runs a finger up and down your panty-covered pussy. You shamelessly grind down on his hand and cry out the moment he lands a harsh slap. 

“Please,” you beg with what's left of your sanity, “take me home.” 

With the same technique as before, Joel holds both wrists in one hand and uses the other to rip your panties off. You try to close your thighs from the sting of the elastic, but he’s quick to stop you. 

“Christ,” he whispers, “now ain’t that a beauty.” 

With two fingers, Joel swipes through your slick folds and brings them up to his mouth.   

“Mmm, sweet girl. Needa taste of this pussy.” 

“What do you mean—“

You try to remind Joel of just where the two of you are, but he fits his broad shoulders between your thighs and fuses his mouth to your pussy. 

You’re surprised, stunned silent by the heat of his mouth on your most intimate parts. You’re by no means ignorant of what a husband does to his wife—you’ve read enough of the romance books your mother keeps hidden in her bedside table and heard enough stories from your friends to have an idea of what happens on a wedding night. 

But never did you imagine it would feel like this. His beard and mustache only heighten the sensitivity between your thighs. The setting sun and the dense forest that surrounds the two of you should add to your terror, but Joel manages to put your attention elsewhere. 

His tongue lashes repeatedly over your clit and down to tease your entrance. You throw your head back onto the grass and stare through blurred vision at the purple sky, uncaring of where you are and of what creeps in the dark. 

He’s greedy, eating away at you like you're the last meal he’ll ever have. You’re slick and sticky, painting his face with your juices, making it easy for him to push a thick finger into your entrance. 

The stretch burns, but he calms you with a swipe of his tongue on your clit and the vibrations of his moans on your skin. 

“Your parents were right, you are a virgin,” he groans, pushing on the little piece of thin flesh that separates the rest of you. “Gonna be a tight fit, baby.”

You have no time to think about when your parents had that conversation with him. Instead, you're dumbfounded at the size of his fingers. You whine, unsure of what exactly you're asking, but nonetheless chanting more, more, more into the air. 

Joel manages to slide a second finger, curving them and pressing on something bumpy that makes you twitch and see black dots in your vision.

He stretches and scissors his fingers in your tightness, opening you up more and sucking your swollen button between his lips. Just when the heat is about to consume every inch of your body, he stops. 

“No,” you whine, trying to yank his head back to your thighs. 

Joel dodges your hands and laughs at the desperation written all over your face. He leans down, pressing his wet face to yours in a sloppy kiss, forcing you to suck on his tongue. Riding your pillow doesn’t compare to this.  

Just as before, Joel rips away and catches your wrist right when you reach for him. 

“If you woulda been a good girl, I woulda eaten this virgin pussy till mornin’,” he says while unbuttoning his jeans. “Made you ride my face and cum as many times as you wanted.” 

You barely understand how someone could ride a face, and yet you clench and gush around nothing, wanting his mouth or fingers back. You see the dark, curly hair at his base before he pulls out his length. 

“But for bein’ a brat, I’m gonna make you come on my cock instead.”

The tip is swollen and leaking a white-ish liquid that makes your mouth water at the sight. He lets go of your wrist and gently slaps your face. 

“Are you listenin’ to me, girl? I won’t fuck you if you ain’t payin’ attention.” 

“Y-yes, sir. I’m listening.” 

Joel laughs once again, noticing the dazed look in your eyes. 

“Don’t worry, baby. I’ll make it fit.” 

There’s a craving inside of you, one that has you suddenly feeling so empty, that if he doesn’t fill you with his cock you think you’ll die. You repeat the word over and over in your head. 

You’ve read it more than enough times and heard it through hushed giggles from your friends, yet the way Joel says the word, the way he squeezes and twists his hand over his cock, you finally understand what the word truly means. 

Your fingers and the handle of your hairbrush were never able to give you what you so desperately seeked. You always stopped before you went in too deep, never able to take that final push inside.

He spreads open your thighs and you lean up on your elbows to try to catch a glance at what he’s doing. You see your sticky fluids stuck on your inner thighs and over the tip of his cock. He pushes in just an inch, and you gasp at the thickness. 

“Fuck, tight little thing,” Joel moans. “Need you to beg f’me, baby.” 

“Please, please, sir,” you answer quickly, “please, I–I want it!” 

He sinks in another inch, his face pinching in barely controlled restraint. 

“Say–fuck, say ‘I need your cock, sir’.”

The words are caught in your throat as you try to adjust to his size. Joel doesn’t like that you take too long to answer and slaps your cheek. 

“Answer me.” 

“I need your–your cock, sir,” you whine. 

“Again, fu–again,” he demands. 

You try your best to repeat his words, except he’s too far gone now. There’s a pinch, a rip of thin flesh and suddenly he’s sliding all the way in. You claw at his arms and at the grass to get away but he’s gripping your thighs, pressing deeper and whispering take it, pretty girl and you ain’t getting away from me.  

You feel full, so incredibly full. You’re split open, ripped apart just for him. 

“I know, baby. I know,” Joel coos, “it’ll hurt only for a minute.” 

His thumb rubs tiny circles on your clit and he leans over to press kisses on your eyelids and cheeks, licking away the tears that fall. 

The stretch burns, but his groans of pleasure and his gentle kisses have a warm glow spreading through your body. Joel notices the change in you and glances down to watch your hips move in small circles. 

“There we go, baby,” he moans, “knew you’d like it.”

He pulls out slowly, keeping eye contact with you and watching each pinch of your brow and flutter of your eyelids. 

“Saved this pretty cunt just f’me, yeah?” 

“Yes, sir,” you whisper, pushing away the sweaty curls from Joel’s forehead. 

He picks up the pace, curling his hand behind your knee and pushing it into your chest, arranging you like a doll. The pain now completely gone, you lay there, running hands over his arms and watching the sweat drip down his temples. 

Every slide of his cock kisses the very end of you. Your hips move and twist on their own accord and you have no choice but to cry out into the night sky. 

“Takin’ this–this big cock like a good girl, yeah?” Joel groans, watching his cock plunge in and out of your little hole. “Need you–fuck, need you to say you’re mine, baby.” 

“I–I’m yours, sir,” you whine, feeling a twinge in your core, “yours, yours, yours.” 

You dig your fingers in his neck and drag him down for a kiss. He grunts as you bite deep enough to draw blood. 

The thoughts from earlier, about running away from him, leave your mind. Even if it hurts a little, even if you aren’t prepared to be a wife, this is exactly what you need. And you won’t let anyone else have him.

“You gonna cum, girl? Gonna cum on your husband’s big cock?” 

This time he doesn’t stop you. His hand squeezes your neck and he traps you into the ground, pistoning his hips into your slick cunt. Your oxygen lessens and your cumming, numbness and white heat spreading throughout your body. 

“Just like that, baby,” Joel growls, “soak my cock.” 

You're gushing on him, painting the hair at his base with sticky juices. You tremble in his arms and claw at the hand that squeezes your neck. Joel doesn’t let up, fucking into your limp body, loving the way you mewl underneath him. ��

He moves in short thrusts, stiffening and letting out an animalistic grunt into the night sky. He presses his head into your neck, sucking and biting into your soft skin while he spills his seed inside of you.

"Take my cum, baby. Take it, take it," Joel moans.

You clench around him, massage his cock with your inner muscles. Every drop of his cum belongs deep inside of you. 

With the little strength left in your body, you run your fingers through his hair. Joel's hands move to grip your thighs and he grinds down, spilling the last of his cum into your cunt.

"You belong to me," Joel whispers. "Don’t ever run again."

You lay there in the grass, breasts bare and pussy full of your husband's cock.

"I won’t," you promise. 

Joel leans back and slowly slips out. There’s a twinge of red mixed with his cum that he wipes up with your ripped panties. He lays down next to you and brings you in close so that your head is placed on his chest. You listen to his heartbeat and the sounds of crickets around you.

You think about the long way back to Joel's–well now your house too–and then you remember exactly where the two of you are.

"Sir, we're outside of the gates what if something or someone comes–we don't have any weapons–"

“There’s another gate a few miles out," he interrupts, "I installed it for extra protection around this place.” 

You drop your head on his chest from relief and exhaustion. Joel rubs a hand down your back and squeezes your arm. 

“I’d never put you in harm's way, pretty girl.”

-

general taglist: iloved1lfs0

ps: i know that there has been other cult leader!joel fics but in no way shape or form have i copied those works for this. if there is something major in my work that sounds similar to someone else's, it's purely by coincidence. i respect each person who takes time out of their day to write FREE content and the last thing i'd do is steal their storylines 🤍🤍🤍

[mameillieureennemie]

you and me (let's make something great)

author's note: so i had an idea, and originally, it was gonna be a ficlet mainly focused on debauchery. BUT THEN my brain decided to turn it into something longer with plot, so here we are. it's very soft in the first bit but don't be fooled, it gets filthy as it progresses. please enjoy!

cw: gp!vi, afab!reader, pregnancy talk, breeding kink, dirty talk, nsfw 🔞 (primarily in the second part)

wc: 3.3k

dividers: @/cafekitsune

part i: let's talk about it

There’s always been talk of starting a family.

Kids with the white picket fence and a garden large enough for them to run around. Maybe a dog or two and a cat because you’ve always spoken about how much you want one. It’d be everything that’s so simple and expected of a family, something so ordinary that it’s almost laughable. But you and Vi never had the opportunity to experience what the ordinary family is.

She grew up an orphan with only her sister by her side, only able to survive due to Vander’s kindness.

You had your own set of problems; a family that didn’t listen or could listen but choose not to.

So to have a family where you can give your children the life you weren’t able to have, that means the whole world and more.

Vi toys around with the idea of asking you again, about the possibility of starting your family as soon as possible. You’ve been together for ten years and married for two, and life has never been as perfect as this.

You’re both doing well at work, bills are being paid on time and there’s even some savings in your joint account. Even savings to potentially look into starting something if that is what you want.

You’re swaying around the kitchen, speakers blasting your playlist as you cook up dinner for tonight. You’ve settled on a simple pasta dish, warm and spicy with delicious herbs. The sauce is bubbling away on the stove and your hips follow the stir of your wooden spoon. You bring the spoon up to your lips, blow gently before having a taste. A hum leaves your lips as your eyes flutter shut, pleased with what you’re creating.

Vi’s enchanted by you and one might call her silly, to be captivated by you merely making dinner. But it’s the mere act of it, the domesticity of it all and how you show your love through everything you do. Even if it’s cooking a dish that you’ve both eaten a hundred times before.

That’s what being in love is and Vi is greedy to share that with someone who’s both her and you.

“Taste this for me?” You ask, facing where she’s sat at the kitchen island. Vi’s quick to hop off her stool and make her way towards you. Her arms encircle you the moment she gets close and your smile brightens at the touch. You lift the spoon up to her lips and even though she knows it’s delicious, Vi goes in for a taste. She mimics your pleased hum from before, swaying you to the slow beat of the song that now plays.

“Babe, you crush it every time,” Vi reveres, causing you to roll your eyes fondly. “How do you do it? Were you a famous chef in your past life or what?”

“It’s pasta sauce,” you respond, voice deadpan but expression vibrant. “The same pasta sauce we’ve been making for five years and can make with our eyes closed.” You turn around in her arms so you can attend to the sauce, Vi taking this opportunity to latch onto your back. She nuzzles into the curve of your neck, pressing a kiss into the sensitive spot there just so she can feel you shiver. “It’s hardly Michelin star worthy.” You pause. “Wait, can dishes be given Michelin stars?”

“Fuck if I know,” Vi murmurs, hooking her chin over your shoulder and settling in. From here, she can see a pot full of water boiling for pasta and the sauce thickening nicely in its pan. “So I want to talk to you about something.”

“We can’t go to the water park next week,” you say, amused. “We’ve had this discussion like six times and as much as I would like to go and hit the wave pool, there’s no—”

The laughter that bursts out of Vi’s mouth is enough to hurt her chest. But it doesn’t stop her from cackling, burying her head into your shoulder in an attempt to muffle how loud she is. She can feel the shaking of your body and hear your lovely laughter as you join her, fully leaning into her chest for support.

“No, you idiot,” Vi manages to say through her chuckles. “Oh fuck you, this was supposed to be a serious thing.”

“Why do you think I said what I said?” You retort playfully and Vi falls even more in love with you, as if that’s even possible. “But tell me what’s on your mind, baby. What’s going on?”

Vi takes a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second to gather herself. When she opens them, you’re turning off the burner for the sauce and reaching for the fettuccine to the side. Just as you’re pouring the pasta into the bubbling water, Vi’s thoughts spill out.

“I want to have a family with you.”

You go still for a moment, your arms poised above the boiling water with the empty pasta box in your hands. Vi’s unable to see your face but she isn’t necessarily worried about your reaction. It’s a conversation that you’ve had multiple times over the span of your relationship, but today is where you start taking steps towards putting it in action.

“Well, yes,” you start, placing the pasta box back on the counter. Then you’re turning in her arms so you’re facing each other again, your eyes peering into hers. “We’ve spoken countless times about this.” You smooth your hands over the rounds of her shoulders, your face soft. “I’m still very much onboard with this because I want to have a family with you too. But I’m guessing you want to talk about a timeline.”

Vi nods, momentarily speechless because you always just get her, even without her having to say anything. She pulls you away from the stove to sit you on one of the kitchen island’s stools. She notes how you eye the pasta and makes a mental note to attend to the pot after five minutes.

“We always did say that we’d really start considering it once we’ve gotten our lives sorted,” Vi says, standing between your thighs. “And I’d say that our lives are pretty solid. We’re no longer in debt and we’ve got a decent amount saved away.” Her fingers play with your hair, causing you to lean into her touch. “So I thought that now would be a good time to try.” Vi then shakes her head. “Obviously, it’s your choice because it’s your body and I’d never want to pressure you into doing anything because of me and—”

Vi doesn’t notice she’s rambling until you’re pressing your finger against her lips, fond amusement colouring your features.

“I married a good woman,” you say, so tender that Vi feels her heart swell so much that it hurts. It presses against her ribs, pushes up on her lungs making her breathless. It makes her cling to you, hiding her head into the curve of your shoulder. Your hands come around to run soothingly down her back and she melts. “I know it's my choice, baby. You've never made me feel like it wasn't.”

Despite Vi knowing that, the relief that hits her is cool and instant. It's always nice to hear that she isn't pressuring you; that she's allowing you to make your own choices regardless of what she wants.

“I've always wanted to have children with you,” you continue, still running soothing patterns down her back. “That's something that has never changed and probably never will.” You then lean back and Vi's graced with the excitement in your beautiful eyes. “I imagine a little kid who's a mixture of me and you. Maybe my hair and your eyes or vice versa.”

“I hope they get your personality,” Vi says softly. “That they get your kindness and empathy. Your patience and wisdom.”

You laugh quietly, closing your eyes to hide from the blinding of Vi's earnest gaze. You're embarrassed, she can tell, and that makes this moment all the sweeter.

“Well, I hope they get your strength and conviction,” you reply, tilting your head up so the tip of your nose catches the softness of Vi's cheek. “That they get your loyalty and ambition. Your sympathy and empathy.”

Vi's cheeks burn at the compliments you dress her in. Compliments that you would call truths because that's how you see her. Even under all the mess and mistakes, you see the diamonds that rest beneath the dirt.

She'll never understand why someone as special as you forever wants to be with her.

“So…what are you thinking?” Vi asks, eager to see where your head’s at. She watches as you purse your lips with a hum, eyes rolling upwards to stare at the ceiling in thought. Then you’re looking back at her with a smile and that’s how Vi finds her answer.

“Really?” Vi has to double check, to be sure that you’re both on the same page; that this is what you want to do from this moment.

“I’ve been wanting to suggest it for a while but—Violet!” You exclaim out of surprise, laughter startled from you when Vi pulls you in for a tight hug. But your arms are wrapping around her instantly, holding on with a solid grip.

“Thank you,” Vi whispers into your neck, planting a delicate kiss over your pulse. “Thank you so much.”

“No need to thank me,” you say quietly, returning the kiss to the curve of her ear. “I want this too.”

Vi nods and gives you a firm squeeze before pulling away, but not too far so she can still keep you in her arms. She’s so overwhelmed; there’s so much she wants to say but all of it is tied at the back of her throat. The words aren’t coherent but they have meaning and Vi will try all she can to convey how precious that meaning is.

“Okay so,” you begin after you both sit in relaxed silence for a while. “I love you so much and you’re my everything but if that pasta’s mushy, I’ll never forgive you.”

“You lie,” Vi replies, nuzzling at your cheek. “You love me too much to hate me.”

“But I love pasta more,” you tease, your soft laughs muted by the gentle press of Vi’s lips against yours.

The pasta has gone soft but you don’t seem to mind, all too distracted by Vi's sweet kisses.

“So you’re officially trying for kids now?”” Jinx says one afternoon in the small cafe they often frequent. It's raining outside and there's a chill in the air that seeps into your bones and makes you want to stay in bed. That's where Vi wishes she was now, all curled up underneath the sheets with you.

“Yeah, we had a proper talk about it a few days ago,” Vi says. “Not that all the other talks weren't proper but our plans didn't have a start date.” She swirls the remaining dregs of coffee in her mug. “Now we're both ready and soon there's gonna be a kid in the picture.”

Jinx hums, taking a sip of whatever iced concoction she's gotten today. “I mean, it's a big thing,” she says around her straw. “Bringing a small human into the world. Plus babies are kinda gross with their uncontrollable bowel movements.” Her nose scrunches up. “Not to mention the crying and screaming and inability to talk for the first two years.”

Vi shrugs. “Yeah, but I don't give a shit about any of that.”

“Well, duh. Because you're with someone who's gonna make it worthwhile,” Jinx replies matter-of-factly. “It's kind of like being in love with the person of your dreams makes you more tolerable to things. Shocker.”

“You're already falling into your Cynical Aunt role.” Vi says, deadpan but smiles when Jinx chuckles.

“Don't get me wrong, I'm gonna love the shit out of that little goober,” Jinx says strongly. “Gonna be the best auntie in the world. Much better than Caitlyn or Mel, that's for sure.”

Vi makes a doubtful expression, an eyebrow raised, and raises her hands to placate when Jinx aims her butter knife at her.

“No, you'll be great,” Vi tells her and despite their jokes, she means it. She sees how Jinx is with kids; how she may not seem interested at first but then slowly opens up. Not to say that she connects with every child but when Jinx cares, she cares with her entire heart. So Vi knows that her children will be loved.

Jinx eyes her and takes another sip of her drink before saying, “There's something on your mind.”

Vi huffs. “How can you tell?”

“I'm your sister, we grew up together,” Jinx lists off. “I mean, ignore the fact that we didn't talk for seven years but I know you.” She finishes off her glass and pushes it to the side. “What's going on?”

“Do you really wanna know?”

“Surprisingly, yes.”

Vi chuckles, running a hand through her hair, before leaning back in her seat.

“I just…worry that I may not be a good parent.” She confesses after a moment.

“Why?” Jinx asks straight away, not giving Vi the time to wallow too deeply.

“Because…I mean, look what happened with us,” Vi says, gesturing between them. “I left you alone for seven years over a misunderstanding that took ages to fix. I was supposed to be there for you when our parents died. When Vander died and I…” Vi stops for a second, a heavy knot in her throat. “...I wasn't there and I'm just scared that I'm gonna fuck all of this up.”

Jinx stares at her for a bit, her expression unreadable, before she gives a big eye roll.

“You're so stupid,” she says loudly.

“Gee thanks.” Vi replies.

“You're so stupid because I don't think you realise how good of a big sister you were,” Jinx continues. “How good of a big sister you are. Life sucked for us for a long time, Vi. Especially after our parents and Vander died. Then the hits kept on coming and we had no say in how we survived for a long time. Yes, we got separated and yes, it made me so fucking mad at you, but you came back for me.” She takes a deep breath. “If we could redo the past, we would. But we can't. But things have been fixed and you've shown me time and time how capable you are.” She then laughs. “I mean, you've been in a committed relationship for twelve years, Vi. Most people don't last up to the five month mark.”

Vi tries to ignore the sting behind her eyes, the tears that slowly blur her vision.

“Plus you guys are totally in love,” Jinx says, a slight smile curving her lips. “It's absolutely nauseating but it's also kinda beautiful. You'll make a really good parent, Vi. You got the best of mom and our dads. And your partner kicks ass and is one of the best people I've ever met so…” Jinx shrugs. “Your children are gonna be so lucky to have you two as parents.”

There’s then a lull that falls between them and Vi's trying so hard not to cry. So she swallows back the knot in her throat, chasing it away with her last bit of coffee.

“Saying all of that must have driven you nuts,” Vi jokes weakly, reaching out to give Jinx's hand a grateful squeeze.

“Yeah, I feel gross and need to take a shower,” Jinx jokes in return, weak too and she squeezes Vi's hand just as tight. “Consider that your birthday and Christmas gift.”

Vi laughs loudly, eyes crinkling and mouth wide with the joy she feels.

“Fair enough.” She concedes, knowing damn well Jinx will surprise her with a homemade gift regardless.

“...So, gonna go home and blast your baby batter into—?”

“Jinx.”

A week or two pass after those conversations are held. Life maintains its norm, leaving you and Vi to continue your existence in its blissful way. It's comforting as it is confusing, because Vi knows that everything’s on the table now. Left wide open for the both of you to bask at.

Vi waits for your move, watches you with a keen eye as you drift throughout the days. She cooks the both of you dinner every other night, picks you up from work every day without fail and holds you close at night so you fall asleep. She does what she knows to do, does it because it has that essence of normalcy.

But that doesn't stop the urges from arising. It doesn't halt the need that bubbles in her stomach every time she sees you. It's overpowering, overwhelmingly so, and Vi fails to understand it until one late evening.

You're curled up beneath Vi’s arm as a movie plays on the television. It's a standard comedy, nothing utterly hilarious but enough to pull a few chuckles from both of you. Vi has hit optimal relaxation, all loose and soft due to you being so close. She can smell the scent of your body wash, drops her face into your hair so she can inhale what lies there. Your shampoo and something so uniquely you.

Her focus has since shifted from the movie, all of it on you as she notes how you’re barely paying attention to the screen. You’ve got this faraway look in your eyes, seemingly lost in thought and Vi wonders what's going through that pretty head of yours.

Then you do something unexpected; you shift a hand towards your stomach and…gently rub at it. The arc of your hand graceful as you follow the slope of your covered flesh. It looks soothing, similar to how you rub Vi's muscles on the days the flare-up of old injuries is too much. But it's also different and Vi's quick to notice it; she sees how your hand comes to lay at your lower stomach and—

Oh.

Vi's suddenly feeling a bit flustered.

A minute goes by, slowly ticking, and Vi tries not to give herself away. She tries not to reveal how the simple act of you rubbing your stomach has her heating up. How she's instantly imagining your stomach round with her child and the way your hand would look caressing the bump.

So tender, so gentle.

Something hot within Vi stirs, causing her to grow a bit restless. The movie captures her attention for a bit, but it hardly does much. Especially when you're pressed into her, still rubbing at your stomach and fuck, her sweatpants feel a little tight.

Because it isn't only about your stomach growing with life inside you. It's also about the transformation you'll grow through. How you'll get softer, how your scent will become a little milkier. How your breasts will swell in preparation and how you'd be a stunning image of how you belong to.

Vi.

Because it's Vi who'll do that to you; it's her who will fuck you full until you can't take anymore. It's Vi who will come and come and come in you until it takes and she sees the fruits of her labour.

It's her who'll…who'll breed you until you’re tongue's tied and your body's a wreck.

So beautiful and pilant and hers.

“...Vi?” Your voice calls her home, like a siren's song, and she's retrieved from her debauched thoughts. “Vi, sweetheart, the movie's done.”

Vi blinks at the television, the credits rolling down the dark screen. How long had she been spacing out for.

“Oh,” she says lamely and you chuckle, standing up from the couch. You tug at her arm, smiling tiredly, as you tilt your body towards the bedroom.

“I'm sleepy,” you say, giving one more tug before Vi’s standing on her feet. “Let's go to bed, we've got work in the morning.”

“Uh huh,” is all Vi can manage as she allows you to lead her to your bedroom.

Something new has clicked in her brain.

Something deep and primal at its core.

...She cannot talk to Jinx about this.

[agirlwithglam]

how to live a luckier life! ✧˖°

hiii! in this post i will be giving all my advice as to how i live a lucky life everyday & how to have LUCKY GIRL SYNDROME! everything that happens to me is so lucky it sometimes astounds me! this mini guide will include everything from mindset shifts, tips, and affirmations! <3 so grab a snack, a yummy beverage and get cozy!!

♡ a bit about me personally, i truly believe that i live an extremely lucky life. i dont live in a mansion, i don't own super rich stuff, i do actually feel left out with some friends, and i'm an extremely sensitive person so you can imagine how that must be. i'm just your average girl who goes to school, comes home, eats, etc. so PLEASE dont be fooled into thinking that you always need more or a certain thing or status, whatever it may be, to live a lucky life. i know its confusing, but just hear me out.

♡ MINDSET SHIFTS!

you get to choose what you define as "unlucky". this was THE BIGGEST thing that made me view myself as super lucky!! you actually get to CHOOSE that when something happens to you, do you choose to view it in a way where it could only ever be bad for you, or are you willing to see it as maybe you were divinely protected from something you had no idea about ... which leads me to my next point,

things happen FOR you, not TO you. of course, as i said earlier you can choose to see things in a lens like "oh of course that happened, the universe is out to get me" OR you can choose to see it as "that may have looked like it sucked but thank you god/ universe for protecting me and guiding me!! i may not know why that happened, but i trust that god/ universe has planned everything only for my greater good." because honey trust me, luck is all up there, in your mind. the exact same thing could happen to 2 people but its just their mindset and thinking process that will determine the quality of their life.

look at all that you do have!! GRATITUDE!! i *do not care* if this is a cliche or whatever BUT YOU BETTER LISTEN UP. (ahem, sorry.) but as i said at the top, gratitude will save you. yes, at first it will seem boring or useless or maybe even hard but once you start to train your brain focusing more on what you do have, the good, the happiness in your life, the more easily it will go there.

all about perspective. you may be complaining about trivial things right now like not winning in a game or not being where you want to be in life, but you have a roof over your head, an education, a family, a device, clean clothes, clean water & food. you’re already more fortunate than a lot of the population. so learn to be grateful with what you have right now because you never know if it will be taken away.

start training your brain to see things in a more positive light. it may not come so easily to you in the beginning, but the more you start realising and stopping yourself in the spiral of the lack mindset, and actually walk yourself through the whole process of changing your perspective on this thing, the more it will come naturally to you!

♡ BARBIE & NOVA:

just to clear everything up a bit, lets meet Barbie and Nova and see how they react to the same situation happening to them.

SITUATION 1: missing the bus oh no! Barbie and Nova had stumbled out their house and sprinted towards the bus but unfortunately, it had already left.

how Nova reacts: ugh, of course this happened! nothing ever good happens to me anyway. i swear the universe is actually like out to get me or something. i just wish i could get lucky just this once!

how Barbie reacts: dang it that sucks! buuutt.... what if i just got saved by a terrible accident? or what if when i went on that bus i would have seen or heard something that would make me feel even worse than how this feels right now? oh my, thank you god for protecting me!! i can't believe i was saved like that.

SITUATION 2: getting a high grade in class they just got their results back from a recent science test and they both got 98% !

how Nova reacts: YES!! FINALLY i get something right! finally i am lucky! oops i hope i don't jinx it

how Barbie reacts: omg yay!! im so happy! i really did deserve that, i worked really hard. thank you god!

do you see how no matter what the situation may be, Barbie is always grateful. she always thanks god/ the universe. on the other hand, Nova instead still believes that she was born unlucky so everything she thinks operates from that sort of place!

♡ PRACTICAL TIPS

focus on how you use your energy throughout the day. desperation reeks and will push any manifestations away. let go and let life. when you know you are a good and pure person who will put in the work and have faith and trust that everything will work out in the end, thats all you need to do

everyday, start consciously thinking of or writing down 3 things you’re grateful for. this is certainly a skill that you must practice frequently and once you do being grateful will come to you naturally!

‘proof portfolio’ when something happens to you that is lucky, write it down! (i write it down in my notes app) doesn’t matter if it’s really small or big, write it down so that when you don’t feel lucky you can look to this as proof otherwise!

♡ AFFIRMATIONS!

affirmations a great for drilling something into your mind to remind you that you already have everything you desire!! i recommend writing it down, repeating these in front of a mirror or even just to yourself but when you say it, say it with meaning. say it as if you’re actually speaking it into existence!

everything happens in my favour

everything happens for my greater good

i am so lucky

the universe works to give me the best life

i always attract lucky experiences

i attract opportunities

luck flows to me effortlessly

i am so grateful for everything i have

i always receive blessings

my life is filled with endless blessings

i am a magnet for miracles and joy

i trust that god has my back

god/ the universe wants to see me succeed!

my life is so lucky!!

everything i want flows to me effortlessly!

i glow from the inside out

i always attract abundance

i vibrate at a high frequency

[vanteguccir]

── ୨୧ !　𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗟𝗢𝗣𝗛𝗢𝗕𝗜𝗔

　　　　　　　　𝒎𝒂𝒕𝒕 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒐𝒍𝒐 x reader

SUMMARY: Where Y/N has suffered with an eating disorder for years, but lately, - because of the some "fans" and social media - her insecurities have been taking her to a more than dangerous path, which she couldn't get out without help.

WARNING: anorex!a, eating disorder, comparison, self sabotage, self hatred, panic attack, pure angst... PLEASE read with caution!

REQUESTED?: No.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Atelophobia; the fear of not being good enough.

This was one of the millions of fears and problems that haunted Y/N's mind. Her head convinced her a long time ago that she simply wasn't enough; for her school teachers, for her classmates, for her friends, for her parents, past boyfriends... not even for herself.

This led her to listen to what others said and thought about herself since she was very young, the desire to be perfect and within society's standards in all aspects of a human being consumed her; personality, thoughts, knowledge... body.

She was told all the time how she should behave, act, and be. She was just a child, but that didn't seem to matter to those who did it, clogging her up with responsibilities and comparisons.

One thing led to another. Her desperation to be the best at everything started to include her own body. "Fat" was the first word people used to describe her. She had no control over the situations around her, but she had control over her weight.

Y/N was always the biggest girl in her class, and her classmates seemed to love reminding her of that; often being excluded from work groups, forgotten in groups of friends, or not chosen in any team during Physical Education classes.

Until the year when everything changed. During the school vacation, she decided to change, intending to return to school as a new girl. The new cycle started well, Y/N saw a nutritionist, cutting out all fatty foods from her routine and consuming only healthy ones. She started going to the gym daily, doing the recommended training time. All of this led her to lose a significant amount of weight.

Soon, the vacation was over, and with that, the negative comments from her classmates were replaced by positive comments. Girls asking what she had done to lose weight like that, searching for advice and seeing her as a miracle. Boys saying how changed and prettier she looked.

How could she not fall in love with her own illness?

So, that made her feel good. Too good... her mind began to yearn to become thinner, more beautiful, just to hear more from others. And then the healthy diet and the one hour training at the gym were no longer enough for her. She needed more if she wanted to be better.

Y/N then intensified her training, staying at the gym for 2 hours per day, doing more reps with more weight. She crossed out several foods from the list of permitted that her nutritionist had made, choosing for herself the ones she thought were ideal, until it had almost nothing left.

Her brain self-sabotaged so that she wouldn't go out with her friends, because they would definitely want to eat somewhere and she wouldn't be able to.

She no longer participated in family dinners, creating excuses so as not to be forced to sit at the table and eat.

Her mind convinced her that she wasn't thin enough to satisfy her boyfriends' sexual and non-sexual desires, which made her pull away during or at the beginning of any relationship she had until the guy got tired, or she simply ended it.

She spent hours on the internet, searching for sensational diets that reduced daily calories to 500 or less, promising extraordinary weight loss. In addition to getting on the scale at least 4 times a day, hoping for a miracle every time she looked at the numbers.

Y/N replaced her eating schedules with random hobbies like drawing, learning a new instrument, or picking flowers from her garden to make flower crowns, occupying her time and mind.

Some things scared her, her period hadn't come in months, clumps of hair fell out every time she ran her hands through it. Her vision went dark at least 3 times a day. Her body shivered from the complete cold of her insides, and her stomach hurt more than usual.

But she had to suffer them alone since she had no one to talk to about, always alone.

Until Y/N met Matt.

Matt was the boy who made her want to get better. He encouraged her to look for a hospital that fit her preferences, where Y/N finally began to receive psychiatric and psychological care.

Her diet changed for the better, into foods that Y/N saw as safe. She did not abandon the gym but reduced the weight and time, maintaining her training just for the health of her muscles, as she had lost a lot of lean mass during her worst moment.

The calculator in her head finally stopped. Her eyes started seeing food as just food and not as the enemy. Her stomach craved for all the snacks she loved, and she finally ate them, without feeling guilty.

Matt was so thoughtful about her entire situation, having suffered himself with extreme anxiety from a young age. He could tell he understood in parts what it was like to live with a mental illness.

So he helped her maintain her healthy diet and eat all her daily meals within her limit - often opting to eat together in their room, since he knew the trepidation Y/N still felt about doing it in front of other people.

Matt praised her in every possible situation, trying not to be extreme but to show his intense love and support for the girl. All of that was helping her a lot.

Until it wasn't.

Y/N and Matt never hid their relationship from the public, the girl knew how famous her boyfriend was and how difficult it could be to keep their relationship hidden, they would be seen together at one time or another.

So it wasn't surprising that the girl appeared in some of the triplets' pictures sometimes, and that's what happened that Friday.

As usual, Nick posted a photo dump on the triplets Instagram to promote the publication of their new car video, and one of the photos was of Matt and Y/N, specifically one in which the two were sitting on the couch in their living room, the girl had her legs draped over Matt's thighs, while his tattooed arm wrapped tightly around her waist, huge smiles decorating their faces.

It was a cute photo, but apparently, that wasn't what fans thought.

While Matt and his brothers were in the kitchen, preparing healthy snacks - a habit they built through the girl, but which in the end helped everyone -, Y/N was lying on her bed in the room she shared with Matt, wrapped in too-warm covers, holding her phone with her right hand while her left hand wrapped around her stomach in an almost painful grip.

Her thumb scrolled through the comments screen beneath the post. Almost everyone there talking about her picture with Matt.

"Matt can do so much better than her"

"I really don't know what he saw in her"

"She's going to end up crushing him like that"

"I'll pay for the gym for her if that's the price for Matt to have a worthy girlfriend"

And so on, it was as if they knew all of Y/N's weaknesses.

Some fans of them could be cruel when they wanted to, and Y/N knew this by heart since seeing Nick crying several times because he was body shamed, or when she noticed Chris being quieter than usual after reading comments saying how loud he was and how that was unbearable.

Her heart was crushed every time she saw Matt suffer in silence until he couldn't hold it in any longer and finally cried in her lap for hours after reading people saying how insignificant and quiet he was in the videos.

Even though a huge mass of the fandom loved them with all their hearts and took care of them as much as the distance of a phone screen allowed, it still wasn't enough to swallow the hate comments.

But when it came to Y/N, more than half of the fandom turned against her. Maybe out of envy, but it was obvious that the girl didn't see it that way. She was convinced that they were right.

Her heart tightened as if someone was crushing it with their bare hands. The air seemed to escape her lungs, and the lunch she ate hours before seemed to want to go up her throat. Her fingers trembled as she held her stomach, feeling everything she had and didn't have there. Her eyes began to water, her lips quivering from the tears that wanted to escape.

Y/N quickly moved her finger to the back button, hoping to break out of the horrible cycle she was about to enter. A loud sob escaped her lips when, upon finally leaving the post, her feed reloaded, and a picture of a model that Y/N followed and admired appeared.

Comparison was her biggest enemy.

Negative thoughts about herself began to pollute her mind, everything around her becoming a fog. The sounds coming from the kitchen became muffled to her ears. Y/N's right hand - which was holding her phone - was gripping the device in such a way that her fingers turned white. Painful sobs escaped her mouth as her eyes remained fixed on the woman's perfect figure.

Why can't I be like her?

The longing for the sensations she felt when she starved hit her chest hard. The desire to want to be as thin as before - or more - filled her.

It didn't take long, and soon, the bedroom door was slowly opened, Matt's silhouette appearing behind it. His face was lit up with a smile - probably because of some joke his brothers made - while his right hand held a plate with two sandwiches.

His cheerful expression was replaced by a frown of concern. Matt quickly closed the door with his feet, walking towards the bed, haphazardly placing the plate on the nearest bedside table before sitting down on the mattress.

His hands flew to Y/N's waist, stopping over her own hand that was squeezing her skin with a force that was sure to leave it bruised.

The girl seemed to wake up from her trance, lifting her head and meeting Matt's calming - but worried - gaze. She cried harder as she imagined what her boyfriend would be thinking of her now.

Automatically, her mind started to play her current state, messy hair, swollen and red face, skin wet with tears, eyes half closed and mouth open, allowing sobs to escape from there.

"M-Matt-" Her sentence was cut off by a sob, her eyes closing tightly.

Matt took a deep breath, trying to process what to do next. His left hand - the one that didn't cover hers - slowly took the phone, taking it out of his girl's death grip. He glanced briefly at the screen, automatically understanding what was happening before locking it and putting the device aside.

He moved his body so that it was closer to hers, resting his hand on her spine and guiding her until she laid her head on his chest, caressing the area below his fingers.

Matt felt his heart break with every tremble that rocked the body beneath his caused by the sobs. If he could take that pain away from his girlfriend, he would.

"It's okay, baby, let it out. I'm right here." He cooed, his fingers caressed the tangled strands of her hair lightly, stroking the area while moving his upper body back and forth, slowly calming his girlfriend.

"Ma-Matty-" Y/N's voice was weak, wobbly from the pain in her heart.

Matt removed his hand from hers for a few seconds, stretching it to the bedside table - where the plate was -, taking the bottle of water that Y/N always filled before going to sleep. He opened the lid in one quick movement, bringing it close to his girl's face.

"Come on, my love. Sit down for a moment and take a sip of water. Please." The boy asked in a soft voice, helping Y/N straighten her posture before bringing the bottle closer to her lips, helping her take a few small sips of the contents.

He closed the bottle after making sure she was satisfied, placing it on the mattress before turning his attention to Y/N again. He brushed away the strands of hair from her face, tucking them behind her ear.

"What if they're right?" She asked in a whisper, catching her bottom lip between her teeth in an attempt to keep from crying.

"No, they aren't." Matt's tone was convincing, as if he was absolutely sure of what he was saying. "You are not worse than others because of your weight. You look great as you are. Your body is perfect, do you know why? Because he's healthy enough to carry you around and take care of you." The boy held her hands lightly, stroking the back of her fingers gently as he looked into her eyes. "The recovery journey is not easy, I remember the words your psychologist said to me when we had that session together. I imagine your head when you see clothes getting tighter, and these comments certainly make you want to give up, I know you, baby."

He paused momentarily, watching her reactions carefully.

Y/N knew that, recovery was hard work. Not wanting to die was hard work.

"Recovery is not a race. You don't have to feel guilty about taking less or more time than you originally thought or having relapses from time to time. This is part of the process, and I want you to understand this. You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my entire life. When I look at the most beautiful things, I remember you. In the pink tulips of the flower shop across the street, in the Cassiopeia constellation, in the bees that fly in our garden and in the greenest tree I have ever seen." Y/N let out a tearful laugh when she heard him mention the tree, knowing his immense love for nature. "Because you're pretty like them."

"I-I'm sorry." The girl whispered, sniffling then lowering her gaze in shame. "I... I saw the photos that Nick posted, and there were comments..." She shook her head, closing her eyes tightly.

"Oh baby." He leaned slightly over Y/N, sealing his lips over her warm forehead. "If you want to apologize, let me do it. If you went through this now, it was because of me."

"No, Matt. It was never and will never be your fault." Y/N shook her head, wiping her eyes momentarily with the sleeve of her - his - hoodie, sniffling slightly before taking one of Matt's hands, intertwining their fingers. "You don't control people, much less through the internet. They will always talk a lot because they are behind a screen that protects them, but that will never be your fault. I would rather go through this a thousand times and have you with me than never have you again."

"I understand." He paused momentarily. "Please, don't let it get to that point again while you're alone. If you see something that upsets you or makes you feel bad, turn it off instantly and call me. I want to be there to help you. I want to be there for you." The brunette asked, staring at her eyes.

Y/N sighed, nodding her head and leaning slightly closer to him, resting her forehead on Matt's shoulder, exhaling the softening scent and perfume that exuded from the fabric of the hoddie on his body.

Her eyes burned from the tears she shed, closing them tightly to prevent more from falling, her heart still feeling sore from everything.

"If you want, we can contact that psychologist again, the one who helped you throughout the process at the hospital." Matt lowered his head, bringing his face closer to the back of Y/N's head, pressing his lips against his girl's hair, closing his eyes as he felt the warmth of her body close to his. "I want to attend some sessions just like we did last time, so I understand how I can help you this time."

Y/N felt her heart warm instantly, her free hand snaking to Matt's thigh closest to her, stroking the covered skin lightly.

"Okay."

Matt loved Y/N more than he loved himself, and he would make sure that she understood that she wasn't alone anymore.

taglist:

@lustfulslxt @ladybunny44 @worldlxvlys @earth2starkey @remussbitch @freshloveforthefit @il0vebeingdelulu @sturniolowhore @mimi-luvzyu @alorsxsturn @urfavgirllyyyyy @domizzzsstuff @sturnizd @hearts4chris @cupidzsq @dracoflaco @leah-loves-lilies @tylerthecreatorsrealwife

(If you want to be added to the taglist, go to this post)

[tan1shere]

Double Trouble

Billie Eilish x Young Miko x female reader !

A/n: well well well, I was watching the whole interview of these fine mfs and finally got a storyline for this plot 😇 I hope you all enjoy this one. Choosing Oxytocin for the song as the lyrics fit the vibe 🤭 - also small disclaimer if the Spanish isn't correct pls let me know !! Google translate isn't always trusted lmaoo LONG !!

Summary: You're dating Billie and go with her to one of her small events, Young Miko happens to be interviewing her when later on things escalate.

Warnings: smut ! THREESOME !!! Billie and Miko are both dominant, sub reader. Overstimulation, strap usage, oral, (all r receiving) mommy kink, orgasm denial, think that's it, lmk if there's anything else. This one's going to be interesting, but enjoy 😈

Masterlist

Hearing fans scream as they call out for Billie. You were currently in the back just waiting for the interview to be done, listening to their voices. She happened to get Young Miko to interview her while she was in Mexico. Which was awesome, seeing as you had been a fan of her music for quite some time now. So there was no doubt you were fan girling just a little.

Once the event had finished they come into the back room, approaching you. "Hey baby, thought I'd introduce the two of you. Considering you're a fan of hers." You stand up, smiling at them both. "You like my music?" Miko asks, seeming a bit surprised. You nod at her question. "Most definitely, I've been listening for a few years now actually." You admit, she gives you a smile. "That's awesome honestly! Have you learnt any Spanish?" "Funnily enough yeah, I've learned a ton of new things just by listening." Your smile widens. Billie seemed a bit, distracted though. As if she had something brewing in her brain. Your curiosity got the better of you especially when she says this to Miko.

"Meet you there." Meet you there? Miko then salutes her with a small smirk. Your brows furrow, looking at your girlfriend. "What was that about." You had asked as you head for the car. "Just a little surprise we have for you." We??? There was something behind her eyes. Excitement, no? Maybe? You let your orbs linger over her own. Then it clicked you knew exactly that look and your eyes suddenly blew up in size. It was lust. She got that you were catching on, putting a hand on your thigh. "Now, I'm ok with it. But I want to make sure you are." It was all very secretive, until she catches you way off guard. Pulling into a parking lot which looked to be at a hotel. "You want Miko to touch you?"

She asks, breathing impossibly close to your face. Your cheeks heat up. I mean sure you'd have a little fan girl moment but you loved Billie, butttt you'd be lying If you said you hadn't imagined it just a tiny bit. "Go on, I know what you're thinking." Her fingers trace over your jaw. "You want her to baby?" You just nod, vividly. But her head shakes. "Uh uh, speak." Your breath hitches. "Yes.. yes I would.." Your eyes look into her growingly dark ones. "Good girl."

And that wasn't even close to the beginning of the best night of your life. Everything was very hush hush. This was incredibly wrong in many ways, but the thrill was overpowering that. "I'm a little nervous.." You admit to your girlfriend. "Don't be my girl, we are going to take good. Care of you." She speaks in such a velvet tone, making you clench your thighs. Already she had such an effect on you. That only made you wonder how Miko would be. Was this really happening.

Yep. It was. The door was being opened to her room, she lets the both of you in. Billie gives you a quick but passionate kiss. "Go strip babe." Your body felt tingly at the way she was speaking, filthy yet so damn sexy. You bite your lip. Billie loved to be in control, not in a horrible way ofcourse she just adored having that strength. "Do what you'd usually do, but listen to her. If she doesn't speak up. Make. Her." You swallow overhearing Billies husky voice saying that. "lo entendiste. - you got it." Miko says with a small smirk causing Billie to mirror that, but more evil.

You had stripped out of everything except your bra and underwear. Sitting nervously on the bed. Was this truly happening were you dreaming? You suddenly were being pulled out of your thoughts as you see the pretty Puerto Rican infront of you. "Hi angel." She smirks at your expression. You turn your head for a second to see where Billie is, was she going to watch. When you felt fingers under your chin. "She's just preparing Mami." Your eyes linger over the small bathroom door in the hotel room. "Something tells me you want her to watch. True?" She asks, going to kiss your jaw. When a shakey breath leaves your lips. "I- uhm-" Her eyes connect with your own.

"Imagine her, watching someone else fuck you. Senseless, might I add." Her kisses move lower and lower, having them on your neck. "Imagine her hearing how dirty you sound, because of me?" Your brain couldn't process this, feeling it fogging over already.

Can't take it back once it's been set in motion.

Your nerves and excitement both mix together. Wondering what you had agreed to. Miko's hands come in contact with your bra covered breasts. Kneading gently. "Can I take this off?" You nod at her question but she remembered what Billie had said to her. Her fingers press lightly against your jaw. "Do I get an answer, angel?" You swallow thickly. "Y-yes you can take it off Miko.." You breathe, her smirk grew at the way you whispered her name. Loving it maybe a bit too much. But she had to hear it again. After she removes your bra, discarding it somewhere. Her lips immediately attach to your nipple, sucking hard. Your mind goes blank at the insane feeling. But even if Billie consented to this, or if it was her idea. You couldn't help but feel bad. Or maybe that just made you feel great.

Maybe that aroused you more, the thought of her watching was something you did enjoyed thinking of. And as if on queue. Shes there in the room. Your eyes meet as her head tilts slightly, your heart races at this insane setting. Miko sucking on your tits, as your girlfriend just watches. You weren't being loud enough to Mikos liking. She then bites your nipple, sending a moan to tumble out of your mouth. Your eyes are still locked on Billie as the noise comes out, feeling your eyes go wide. But she smirks. And she does it broadly.

"Don't hide your noises baby. - we've talked about this." Billie then speaks, noticing the way you were biting your lip extra hard. "Go on, wanna hear how she's making you feel." You do as told, but God was this so incredibly filthy. Was it bad you enjoyed it very much? She continues to watch.

She couldn't look away.

Your head lulls back against the headboard as Miko travels down your body, leaving kisses. Her eyes then look into yours as she's reached the main event. Ofcourse asking for permission but silently. You go to nod, considering she hadn't spoken you'd be safe. But the look in her eyes makes you think differently. Your brain just goes to the quickest sentence you can think of. "Please take them off." Your winey voice made them both smirk. Although you weren't looking at Billie right now, when you did. You swear you could've just cum. Then and there. You hold her gaze for a bit.

Shed wanna get involved.

That eye contact remains, until Billie speaks. "Make her cum." Her eyes still boring into your own as she utters those words. You felt like you could go insane. "Heard that mama." You nod slowly. "Y-yes." Miko smirks at your reaction. "You look scared love. Don't worry I don't bite. ... unless you want that." She finishes, coming impossibly close to your cunt. It now being free from the previous fabric clinging to it. You swallow again, letting your mouth hang open as her tongue is on you. Your head falls limply at the insane feeling. Billie's smirk never leaved her face it was as if she was frozen. Getting to watch you like this from a different point of view. Your moans grew louder as she picks up the pace, causing your hands to grab her hair.

What would people say, if they listened through the wall.

There was no other sound but Miko's tongue lapping at you, your soft but powerful moans. Making not only Billie, but Miko also. Go mental. Your orgasm was quick to approach as Miko speeds up, if that was even possible. Sending your mind blank, feeling yourself cum on her tongue with a slight screech. You let out pants, trying to catch your breath again. "Overstimulate her." Billie then orders. Your eyes look over at her. Finally gaining the courage to actually say something. "Bils-" Her head tilts, once again. "Hmm?" Your mouth shuts almost immediately. "Nothing." "No no, go on babe. What is it? You don't want that?" But that'd be a lie, ofcourse you did.

"I just-" But that was cut short as Miko's back at it, having you shake at how sensitive you truly became. You let a shakey but satisfied sigh escape you, having your eyes flutter shut. "What was it you were saying angel?" Your back arches too distracted by your second orgasm to fully care about what Billie was mocking you for.

I can see it clear as day. You don't really need a break.

Billie craved to watch you writhe under Miko, the way you're almost cumming again. But Bills was having too much fun. "Deny her." Billie speaks lowly. And just like that you felt nothing. A cryish whine leaves your plump lips. "Nooo." Your eyes had been closed. "Wanna see what you can take." Billie mutters, enough for you to hear. Your lips then pout as you look at Billie. With such a defeated look in your eyes. Almost begging without words. But you knew you had to speak them you knew that's what she wanted, you to beg.

You take any extra courage floating around inside you and grab Miko's face. "Please, please don't stop. Need your tongue." Billie smirks as you say that, proudly. Miko dives back in satisfied, herself. With how you responded. But she felt like teasing you, testing your limits. Billie seemed to be proud of that also, knowing you'd start to get bratty if she kept it up. "Make her cum, one more time. Then I'll come on over." Billie states, making Miko nod in response.

You should really run away.

She kept circling your clit with her tongue, moving back and forth from there, to your entrance. Your head is rested back as she does so feeling worn out but so amazing at the same time. All you could then think of was what Billie would do. "Make her work for it, need her begging." You look over at her, giving an annoyed little look. But she returns it with a warning one, causing you to immediately look away from her. It was nearing once again, the coil was incredibly close to snapping when Miko squeezes your thigh tightly. Signaling for you to not do so yet. A slight whimper comes from you, trying to hold it. "Please let me cum please-"

Her whole tongue inserted into you suddenly, rapidly sticking it in and out at an ungodly pace. You were shocked at how good she was, nearly as good as your girlfriend. Your mouth agape as your coming close to your release. "Please, please- need to." She looks up at you with such a lustful look. Pulling away slightly to speak. "Cum now." And so you did. Hard. Feeling just as amazing the first two times if not. Better. You let out ragged breaths. Miko removes herself from you. Standing up fully, swiping her thumb over her lip to get the excess cum and put it inside her mouth. "Hm, tasty." She says. Billie comes over standing next to her. "Isnt she." She smirks at you.

You sit up on your elbows, just now catching your breath. Billie inches closer towards you, crawling ontop of your figure. Your eyes glued to hers as she looks to your lips. "I don't think you're ready for this." She spoke in a hushed whisper. Leaning in to kiss you. Ofcourse you kiss back, honestly missing any kind of touch from her. Your hands reach out to gently place them on her face. But it's as if they had already discussed this, because Miko is lifting you up slightly, sitting on the bed and placing you on her lap. Your eyes dart back to Billies. Gulping. "What? Nervous?" Your head shakes but her eyebrow raises in a questionable way. "N-no..not nervous." You speak up.

"Hmm, good." You hadn't even noticed she attached the fake dick to herself, until you felt it near your entrance. Looking back at Billie once again and taking a tiny breath in. Were you nervous? "So wet." She says as her fingers swipe along your sticky cunt, from the multiple orgasms. You bite your lip subconsciously, feeling the dildo peek into your hole. "Please Bills.." Miko's hand moves to your throat, causing Billie to get closer to your face. "What's my name baby? Say it correctly and I'll give you what you want." You take a second, letting out a few staggered breaths. "Please fuck me mommy."

And thats exactly what she was about to do, sliding it in almost all the way, making you arch your back. Slowly bringing it down again as she begins to fuck into you. God this was so insane but amazing all at once. More moans fill the hotel room, you didn't care who listened to be honest you were too caught up on the feeling of Miko's hand still around your throat and Billie's hard thrusts to worry about what others may think. Billie begins to pick up the pace, Miko's other hand coming to cup one of your breasts sending pleasure throughout the whole of your body. Head to toe shivers consume you as her hand tightens just slightly.

Billie watches in amusement as your face contorts into pure ecstasy. Eyes rolling back as she enters you even deeper. You truly were on cloud 9. It just felt too good.

I wanna do bad things to you.

Her hand rests on your waist as she continues to fuck you, feeling you suck her in as if it were her own dick. Making Billie go more feral for you. Her other hand makes its way to your clit, rubbing slowly. Whimpers filling her ears as she does, feeling like she could cum from that alone. She craved to hear such sounds coming from your pretty lips. Drove her mental. Billie didn't feel like being as nice though, wanting to make you go mental. And it sure did. "You cum when I say to got it, pretty girl?" You let out a slight whine, not before shes grabbing your face with her fingers. Smushing your cheeks slightly. "Got. It?" "Yes.. - mommy." Her once Satisfied look returns, bigger than previously.

"Good girl, that's exactly what we like to hear. Isn't that right Miko?" She then replies. "Without a doubt Bill." Your breathing becomes irregular again, trying to gain that focus. "I- I'm so close." Billie just shakes her head. "Don't even think about it." You then feel Miko's soft fingers dance over your skin, moving their way down to your pussy to mess with your clit. "Bi-" You let out the filthiest moan ever, trying so hard to hold it. "C-cant.. please." You speak on the verge of tears. Bingo. Just what Billie was after. The little pout on your lips almost makes her give in. But she keeps drilling into you, so much harder making your head spin. "I-" "hold it."

"B-b..u." A near pornographic moan then ripped out of you, feeling your body shake. "Be a good girl baby. Know you can." - "hold it mama." Miko then whispers in your ear. Another whimper comes from your mouth trying so so hard to keep it in.

I wanna do bad things to you.

Billie goes close to your ear, close to Miko. They then kiss one another making you stare, as your girlfriend comes back into view. There was no denying how hot it was. Billie catches your eyes. She chuckles softly. "You enjoyed that didn't you bub?" You couldn't even speak. She lets that one slide, knowing how much you were struggling. "Precious girl can't even reply to you." Billie shakes her head at Miko. "Shes too busy crying over my dick huh baby?" Your head just rests back on Miko's shoulder. Almost screaming at the insane euphoria you felt. Miko's other hand quickly covers your mouth, tightening her grip on your throat. "Shhh baby not too loud."

I wanna make you yell.

Wanna do bad things to you.

Your eyes roll back again, letting out a groany whimper.

Don't wanna treat you well.

It was getting nearly impossible. Until Billie says the three words. "You can cum." And you gladly do, gushing all over the plastic dick inside you. Squirting a little over Billie. Your brain felt empty, having your eyes closed to try regain stability.

If you find it hard to swallow.

"Just one more angel, know you can." Your eyes snap to Billies. "S-so sore." Miko wipes the lingering tears on your face. But as she starts to move slowly, the need for more is inching its way back. Grabbing onto her hips. "Fuck!" You then scream, making Miko's hand return on your mouth. She eventually got an idea. "Open." She says to you. You do as told going to let her slender fingers enter your mouth. You suck needily, feeling Billie speed up yet again. Her thrusts go at an ungodly pace eventually sending your body to writhe and shake underneath her. Those tears coming back, you cry out of pleasure. Sucking harder on Miko's digits.

I kinda wanna look away.

Her grip on your neck loosens, keeping her fingers there for you to greedily suck on. She honestly enjoyed the feeling of it. Bringing that hand down from your neck to your nipple giving it a pinch. You moan around her fingers, feeling your fourth or fifth. You honestly lost count. Orgasm of that night.

Kinda wanna get involved.

Billies hands grip your waist, completely railing the fuck out of you. The sight infront of her making her moan, herself. Low, lustful. Filthy. Your eyes continue to gloss over feeling it coming closer and closer. But you listened to what she had said earlier, only when she says to.

Other people don't obey.

Her thrust continued, her stamina was impeccable. But you knew that already. Your hands reach out to touch her, grabbing at her tits. She smirks at you, knowing their your favorite. "Can feel how close you are. Tugging me in." You accidentally bite down slightly on Miko's fingers. Little did you know she didn't mind that, one. Bit. Your teeth retract from doing so, continuing the sucking motion.

You should really run away.

The coil was close to snapping, it got harder for Billie to even thrust at how tight you had became. She needed it, you needed it. Miko needed it. "Cum." She breathes.

Bad. Things.

You did with yet another scream, of who's name? Well ofcourse both. They both, made you cum. They both, made you scream. And there was no doubt this wouldn't be the last time this would happen.

It was your little secret.

[heeseung-min]

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞, 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭

Synopsis: Jungwon couldn't understand why the fuck you would choose other man when he is ready to give you everything, willing to do anything to get you although that means he need to get bloods on his hands

Warning: Yandere and obsessive Jungwon, manipulation, gaslighting, death (sorry yall), blood, some gore details, this will have two parts

Word counts: 3.5k+

An alarm sounded from the clock on the night stand, indicating the time was 7.00 a.m. Jungwon groaned at the loud sound that was disturbing his beauty sleep. He rested for a few minutes before waking up prepare himself for class later.

He walked with a gimbap at his hand as breakfast today. Sometimes, he wished he could just quit everything and spend his time at home watching shows and play games but then his grandmother will scold him if he did that. He continued walking while listening to songs on his phone before someone collided towards him from behind.

"Good morning, Won!!!"

There you were. He looked at your cheerful face before pinching your left cheek because you looked so cute to him.

"Ahh it hurts. Why do you always pinch my cheeks?"

You asked as you glared at the tall boy who only giggled at you. Jungwon put his hand on your shoulder and pulled you closer to him. His mood completely changed from sour to happy. You are indeed a happy pill to him.

"You looked cute. That's why."

You rolled your eyes and started to talk about your family vacation you went two days ago. You guys were waiting for the bus to arrive and Jungwon keep staring at you. He knew something wa happening to him when he keep wanting to be with you and always caring about you. He realized that he is falling in love with his own bestfriend which is you.

He wanted to say something but when the bus arrived, he shut his mouth and hold your hand to go into the bus together.

"What do you want to say?"

You suddenly asked when both of you finally arrived at the school. He turned to you with confusion on his face.

"I noticed you wanted to say something before we ride the bus."

"Nah, I just wanted to ask about yesterday homework."

"Oh? The top student didn't finish his homework??"

You teasingly asked as Jungwon is the top student and always finish every work the teachers gave. The boy lightly scoffed then he ruffled your hair.

"No, I'm just worrying about you. Your small brain can't handle those hard questions."

"Urghh , you are mean."

He laughed again when you hit him softly. Both of you keep talking and went inside the classroom.

You looked at how some students from other class crowding your classroom. Most of them were girls. When you entered, you saw some of your school seniors chatting with some of your classmates, Taehyun and Kai. Huh, no wonder many girls came here. They wanted to see Beomgyu, Soobin and Yeonjun. Three of them are senior student and one year ahead of you and they are very close with Taehyun and Kai.

You glanced away when Beomgyu turned to look at you. Suddenly, your cheeks turning red.

"Are you okay?"

"Huh?", you blinked at Jungwon who suddenly put his hand on your forehead. He looked so worried. You didn't want to admit the truth and just stated you were fine.

Jungwon continue to talk after you both sat down. You tried to focus on what he trying to say, however your eyes being a bitch tried to glance on your beloved senior. Once again, you were shocked when he’s already staring at you and smiled when both of your eyes met.

You frowned a little when Beomgyu and his friends finally went out from the classroom. But at the same time, you noticed he smiled at you again before leaving the class when the teacher came.

______________________________________

"Jungwon, don't be silly. I can go back by myself."

"Still, I'm worried for you. We usually go home together."

"It's okay. It's for today only. You have a meeting to attend."

"I can still ask others-"

"Hey! I'm really fine, Jungwon."

The said boy sighed before nodding at you. He reminded you to be careful before leaving you to go to the meeting.

You sat at the bus stop while munching some desserts you bought on the way there. You felt funny when you saw some kids bickering with each other.

"What a cutie."

You turned to your right when you heard a very familiar voice and gasped when Beomgyu sat beside you while staring at those kids you looked earlier. His side profile impressed you so much and you were thankful to God for letting see him this close. He turned to you and smile before staring at the front back again.

"Usually, I saw you together with your boyfriend."

"Eh? B-boyfriend?", you questioned him back and tilted your head as a sign of confusion. Beomgyu can’t help but smile at your cute habit.

"Yeah, the one that looked like a cat. I don't really know his name.”

"Umm, that's Jungwon and nope he is just my close friend.", you finally understood what he meant by boyfriend cause you and Jungwon are really close and many people has been saying the same things too. So, that’s normal if  Beomgyu thought the same.

You watched Beomgyu nodded his head before smile brightly. You didn't know why he suddenly said that.

"So, that means I have a chance to confess."

"Con-confess?"

You didn't want to put too much hope. You have been crushing on Beomgyu since last year when he helped you carried stuff and even bought a drink for you. Beomgyu took out something out of his bag and showing to you. You saw how his hands shaking a bit and he tried to calm himself down before talk to you.

"Y/n, I like you for a year now. So, do you want to go Taylor Swift concert with me this weekend as our first date?"

______________________________________

"Y/n!"

"Yeah?"

You looked over to Jungwon who was glaring at you right now. Suddenly you remembered he was telling you something but your mind was still busy from yesterday's event with Beomgyu.

"What were you thinking about? You didn't even pay attention to my story."

"Sorry, Won. I'm just a bit sleepy. Can you repeat it again?" You asked the boy with regretful smile on your face. Jungwon scoffed when he didn't see you were lying to him and started to talk again with you listening to it carefully not wanting him to catch you spacing out again.

"Also, I want to ask. Do you want to hang out this Saturday? I have a good plan for us."

Jungwon hold himself from giggling. He is excited and can't wait to show you what he planned. He watched you were thinking for a while before answering him with guilty tone.

"I'm sorry, Won but I already have plan on that day. Can we postpone what have you planned on other day? I promise I will clear my schedule the next time."

You looked really guilty so Jungwon can't do anything but just accept it. He should tell you earlier. What made him more frustrated was the Taylor Swift concert tickets he had bought for both of you on this Saturday. Ah damn, guess he just sell it to someone else since it's useless already.

"It’s okay, never mind. What about after school? Do you want to go eat tteokbokki at the usual place? It's been a long time we go there."

Again, he saw your face turned to guilty expression.

"I have tutor."

"It's okay. I can wait."

"No, I don't want to burden you. But, we can go there tomorrow! Is that okay with you?"

Jungwon nodded at the new plan you made with him. Of course he's a bit sad that you guys can't do it today but he understood you. Although he felt curious why suddenly you need a tutor since you already doing well in your academics.

"Come on, let's go to class. Break is over."

Jungwon noticed you became different. Your attention seems to be somewhere else. Mostly at your phone. He also noticed whenever you guys in the class, you will stare at the outside than focus on the teacher. Whenever you are on your phone, you will smile and giggle at the screen. When Jungwon asked what are you giggling at, you will say nothing and prevent him from seeing your phone.

He noticed you started to being far from him. You didn't spend time with him anymore and always refusing his plan to hangout with you.

"Are you sure Y/n doesn't have boyfriend, Jungwon?"' Sunghoon, one of his other friends asked. They were having a dinner together with another five members at their favourite restaurant.

"If she dates someone, I will be the first one to know about that."

Jungwon felt uneasy at the thought of you dating with someone else. Why would you focus on someone else when he literally always with you. He knew everything about you, he knew your favourite character in Hello Kitty, he knew what time you would get up in the morning and sleep every night. He knew your favourite colour, food and drink. He is perfect to be your boyfriend. So, why would you want to be with other man than him?

"Jake hyung, do you have any idea about y/n? She is your sister after all."

"Well, I noticed she always went out with cute outfits and everytime I asked her, she will said "just going out with a friend". I immediately assumed it was you, man."

The other members felt sorry towards Jungwon. They knew about his crush towards you and they were supporting it but looks like it become impossible now.

"Wait, isn't that Y/n? Who's with her?"

All of them turned to the direction Sunoo has been pointing at. Everyone looked shocked especially Jungwon and he felt disappointed finding the truth like this. There you were standing with someone else instead of him. You looked so happy while talking to the male beside of you.

"Oh my, isn't that Beomgyu? Your friend right, Heeseung hyung?"

Sunoo genuinely asked as all of them still staring at both of you from inside of the restaurant. Jungwon became more frustrated when Beomgyu pecked your lips few times and he hated it more when he saw how you were enjoying every single of it.

"Jungwon, are you okay?"

Now, everyone looked at Jungwon when Jay asked him that question. The boy became quiet and didn't even answer the question. Instead, he continue eating his meal.

Everyone became quiet and started to eat their meal again when they realized Jungwon isn't going to say anything.

______________________________________

The day after continue as usual. However, you noticed that your best friend is unusually quiet. He always talk to you every time and he is the first one will start the conversation. But now, he didn't even try to look at you.

"Jungwon, what is wrong with you?"

"What is wrong with me?"

You scoffed when he mocked at your question. You groaned and pulled his shoulder to turn to you. Now, you finally can see him. Jungwon rolled his eyes and tried to pull your hand off his shoulder.

"Can you let me go?"

"No! Until you tell me what is wrong with you. You changed so suddenly."

"Oh, I'm the one who change now? Shouldn't you asked that yourself, Y/n?"

"What- what...do you mean?"

"Why you didn't tell me you are dating with Beomgyu?"

"Ahh.. that. Well, it's not a big deal Jungwon. I was planning to tell you about it."

Jungwon felt annoyed. How can you think it's not a big deal when literally it is. Because of the secret, you slowly drifted apart from him. Only him should be always with you. Not someone else and not even Choi Beomgyu.

"Not a fucking big deal? Are you serious y/n? I've been feeling so sad these days because you're no longer want to hang out with me. Hell, I even feel like our friendship getting ruined since you and Beomgyu become together."

The whole class become silent after Jungwon finally burst out his feelings towards you. You felt so embarrassed and guilty after he lashed out like that. Everyone looked at both of you wondering how can you guys fighting with each other. Jungwon felt guilty a bit when he saw your eyes starting to tear up. He knows you don't like getting scream at but he couldn't hold himself back.

"I'm sorry." That's the only words you said before gathering all your stuffs and went out from the classroom. Jungwon sighed and cursed to himself and took his stuff and went out from the class so he can follow you. He saw you were already walked out from the school gate and quickly caught you before you went too far.

"Y/n stop." He said but you paid no attention to him. Jungwon sighed and went in front of you.

"I'm sorry for yelling, okay? I didn't mean to do that. I was too mad." Jungwon hold your hands as assurance and it's working when he felt you hold back his hands. He then hugged you closer.

"I love you, Y/n. I really do."

You sighed after hearing Jungwon’s confession. The guilty started to build up inside when you know you can’t do anything but reject him kindly.

"Jungwon, you know Beomgyu is my boyfriend. I'm really sorry."

"Yeah, but not for too long."

"Sorry, what were you saying?" You untangled your body from his hold to look at his face as you wanted him to speak again the words you couldn't hear earlier.

Jungwon didn't say anything instead he just stared at you while caressing your hair. He couldn't help that your hair is so soft and silky made him wanted to do this every single day. Oh how he wished he could wake up beside you and do this. Instead, you are letting that bastard Beomgyu do things what he wanted to do to you.

"Can we please talk?”, his doe eyes staring at your eyes begging for some hope and you nodded your head at his request.

Both of you end up went to the nearest cafe from your school. Jungwon ordered drinks and pastries and you started to explain everything about your relationship with Beomgyu. You can sense how Jungwon trying to hold himself knowing how this news bring heartbreak to him.

Your voice called him back to realization. Jungwon looked back to you and saw something sparkling caught his attention.

"You wear necklace?"

“Yeah, it’s pretty, right? Beomgyu bought this for me.” You smile widely while you said that as you were holding on it. You could still remember how Beomgyu was so nervous to put it on you. Jungwon however didn’t feel slightly happy but betrayal because back then you used to hate wearing things on your neck and you would tell him to not get you necklace as birthday present.

“I thought ….you don’t like wearing things around your neck.”

“Umm, well you can say that love can change a person and that’s normal Jungwon.”

Love can change a person

Love can change a person

Love can change a person

“What are you thinking about, Jungwon?”

Jay asked he put the curry he cooked on the plate with rice beside it and served the meal to Jungwon. The boy had asked to stay at his house tonight after the talk he had with Y/n earlier as he wanted to discuss something important. Even though there are other members like Heeseung, Sunghoon or Sunoo, Jungwon always find Jay is the best when he needs a good opinion.

“I hate the fact that Beomgyu got to be with Y/n. Meanwhile me has been crushing on her for years and I lost the chance.”

“Then steal her back.”

“What?”

Jungwon stared at Jay who said that casually. He wanted to see if Jay was joking but instead the man looked at him seriously.

“What do you mean, hyung?”

“I know you are not dumb, Jungwon. You know what to do. Kill Beomgyu and you can live happily with Y/n." Jay said it casually like the thing he suggested totally will not harming anyone. Jungwon went speechless because he never expects his hyung has his own dark side.

“Jay hyung, are you...are you hearing yourself right now? You know what will happen if I get caught doing that right?"

“Jungwon-ah, trust me you will never get caught.”

Jay reassured him but Jungwon still hesitate to do it. After all, killing someone could bring him to jail and he doesn't want that.

"If you are willing to let Y/n be with someone else then you can forget about this."

"Fuck it, what's the plan?"

Jay smiled after successfully convinced the boy. That night changed Jungwon to something different. The old and loser Jungwon is gone and the sinister and evil is the one replacing it.

______________________________________

You have not seen Jungwon for two weeks now. He hasn’t been responding to your texts or pick up your calls. You even asked your brother and his members since they are close with Jungwon but neither of them know where and what happen to Jungwon.

You also went to his house but you didn’t get any response when you knocked on the door. You started to feel empty and sad. You thanked Beomgyu for cheering you up and always assure you that your best friend would be fine.

However, one day while you were out dating with Beomgyu, you opened your phone when you felt its vibrating. You looked at the notification and your eyes widened at the new message you got from your best friend, Jungwon.   

Help me please

And that was enough to stop whatever you were doing. You asked Beomgyu to send you to Jungwon’s house. You guessed he was at the house since he didn’t say any specific location. It was nearly midnight and you didn’t care about that. What you only care at the moment was Jungwon. You can’t help but to be wondering why he was texting that at the first place. You just hope everything is fine.

But your boyfriend thought otherwise. Beomgyu didn’t know why he thought the text message from your friend was a trap. He felt like there will be something terrible going to happen but he doesn’t want to upset you since Jungwon is your best friend. He can see from your eyes how excited and worried when you got that message.

“Are you sure Jungwon was the one who texted you?”

“Yes, Beomgyu. It’s not like I delete his number from my contact.”

“I mean it’s just ridiculous. At least he need to call you first and explain everything.”

“Let’s hear it when we arrived at his house.”

“I just want you to be safe, Y/n.”

“Jungwon is my friend, Beomgyu. I know he will never hurt me.”

Your last words made the conversation stop. Both of you and Beomgyu worried about different things. He worried about your safety and you worried about Jungwon. Beomgyu wanted to say something but before he can even do that, a car suddenly crashed to your side and made the car spun few times. Beomgyu hold his steering tightly and tried to make a turn so he can prevent the spinning and end up bumped his car hardly to a utility pole.

You felt so dizzy and you could sense blood dripping on top of your head. You heard Beomgyu was yelling for you to not sleep but you can’t control yourself. The dizziness had made you so weak and couldn’t think  about other things anymore. Beomgyu’s scream was a last thing you heard before you passed out.

“Fuck, Y/n. Wake up! AArghh!!!”

Beomgyu was screaming in pain when he yelled at you. He tried to reach his phone that fell down near the gas pedal. He wanted to call for help but before he could try, he sense a light from the other side of his car. He turned around noticed the car had damage on its bumper so he started screaming for help. He tried to wave even though his arm hurt so bad but after few minutes he realized that the driver didn’t go out from their car instead the car started to reverse and created long distance from his car.

“You sick fuck! How dare you leave after hitting us?”

But, the car was not leaving actually. It stopped at some point when it reaches around 100 metres from Beomgyu’s car. Beomgyu already sensed some danger when the car stopped. He tried to start back his engine but nothing could work when his car got too many damages.

And what he guessed was right because the next thing happened was the car started went towards him in a full speed making Beomgyu’s car overturned when it's collided. This time, the impact was so bad that made Beomgyu’s body out of his car and landed on the hard road. He groaned at the pain on his abdomen but keep trying to go to his car just want let you out. But then, he went shocked when another car suddenly appeared and there were few guys went out from it.

“Please, please help us. My girlfriend’s in there. Please take her first.”

“God damn it. Why is he not dying yet? I thought the second crash would finish him already.”

“Relax. I would finish him by myself.”

 Beomgyu were shaking when he heard familiar voices. The road is empty and dark so it’s difficult to see those faces. He tried to stand up but obviously the strength he had on his body already gone. He felt betrayed and frustrated when he finally saw the faces.

“You.…you did this?! Do you know how worried Y/n is?!!!”

Jungwon stood up in front of  Beomgyu with a smug face. He went closer to Beomgyu and whispered something to the man.

“She did? I’m so happy then. Now, say goodbye to Y/n cause I ain’t letting you live.”

“You are crazy, Jungwon. You did this just because you are jealous?!!You insecure--”

BANGGG!!!!

With just one shot Beomgyu fell to the road and dead immediately. Jungwon scoffed and kept his gun inside his pocket before went to you. Thankfully, you are still breathing after the crash. He picked you up and put you inside the car.

“Can you guys please clear this up and make sure all of the footage on this road got erased?”

“Sure, Jungwon. We can clear this up. Just focus on Y/n.”

Jungwon looked at his friends started to take Beomgyu’s dead body into their car and clean the blood off the road. Then, he turned to you and caressed your face. The dried blood on your face didn’t disgust him at all. Instead, he licked it to make your face clean.

“You miss me, hmm? I’m here baby. We are going to be together finally.”

You and him are going to be fine.

ahh first part is done finally 😂 I'm sorry for the cliffhanger but i hope you guys enjoy, im still doing the second part so i cant exactly state when it will come out but when it's ready i will tell yall

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[xenteaart]

when you're feeling weak, i'll be the words if you can't speak

pairing: chan x reader (i wrote it with idol!chan or producer!chan in mind, but it can fit any au, really) genre/warnings: er, angst, hurt/comfort, implied suffering w depression and anxiety. reader is feeling off and insecure. also kinda going almost non verbal author's note: a short lil songfic ig coz it's inspired by Isak Danielson – I Can't Lose You. basically channie being a comfort boyfie material

to put it simply, you were never not anxious or insecure. but stepping into the big adult life, you sort of learned to conceal it well, even from your own self. the fake it till you make it thing, and you could even say you've "made it" with a small exception of the days where your brain and your entire nervous system randomly circled back to your default settings. "so what are you gonna eat, baby?" chan asks with a cheerful soft tone, glancing over the menu and then back at you.

today's a good day. you haven't been too overwhelmed with work, nothing out of the ordinary happened. so naturally, a pinch of guilt somewhere deep in your guts makes you feel like a bother to be around, and today — for no good reason.

"are you okay?" he notices your slightly spaced out gaze when you're trying to read the menu but not really reading, more like frowning and getting nervous.

"yeah.. no. no, i don't know," you murmur barely audibly, losing your focus for the tenth time in a span of the last five minutes. brain fog takes over, making your vision blurrier than normal and your thinking all floaty and hazy. as if you're looking at the world through dirty lenses, but also the lights are too bright and your surroundings are loud.

"i dunno, i just..." can't even speak for myself today and choose a meal and say it out loud because suddenly everything is embarrassing and difficult.

chris looks slightly worried because you might be in pain or feeling unwell, but nothing hurts except your pride. because you're a big girl, you have been for years, and now you want to cry on the spot because you can't choose between pasta and soup all of a sudden. it makes you feel even more stupid.

"can you please choose and order for me today? my brain just can't," you try to explain, visibly stressed and overwhelmed by a simple mundane task, "i want somethin' warm and filling," you specify to make it easier for chan.

he doesn't make a big deal out of it, just nods and meets you with a gentle 'course, baby. he then talks to the waiter and makes sure they don't ask you anything which feels like a relief. sometimes it's nice to feel invisible, especially in a vulnerable state.

after the horrifying deed is over with, chris leans in a little closer to be able to speak in a softer, quieter voice.

"d'you wanna just have dinner in silence and head home?" he asks while massaging your palm with his fingers soothingly, so calm and nonchalant as if you didn't just obsess over the smallest thing to the point of making yourself filled with shame and insecurity.

that's how chris always does it. by showing you that whatever it is that's bothering you is not a burden to him. he's got you. it's okay if you want or rather need him to do something for you. he's happy to be your strong shoulder to lean onto and not think about a single thing while he takes care of whatever it is at the time.

"yeah. or you can tell me about your day and stuff. i wanna know and i'm okay with listening. just not... responding, maybe?" you give him an awkward smile as he nods understandingly and plants a little kiss on the back of your hand. a modern gentleman and a caring lover.

somewhere in the middle of a story about how cubase was lagging and almost crashed mid producing session today, the waiter brings your meals. it's two pumpkin cream soups, some grilled and seasoned breads and a fresh greek salad to share.

oh, to be loved like this.

your stomach growls at the smell of food, and a bright proud smile is instantly painted over chan's features.

[oracle-of-dream]

Sweetness #7 (Final)

Minors DNI

This is the final chapter of the Sweetness series! Thank you for reading till the end!

Summary: Riize proposed a competition to you. Whoever can please you the best tonight. Gets to keep you... If you're conscious enough to choose a winner.

Warnings: Male reader, a lot of dicks, Justice for Sungchan, Throat fucking, Group sex, Multiple Orgasms, Stomach Bulge, Creampie, Handjob, Blowjob (Rec & Giving), Rough Sex, Talk him thought it, Bukkakke, Crying, Overstimulation

Wordcount: 3.7k

You opened your eyes and groaned as you rolled over in bed. You'd fallen asleep at some point but didn't feel any better. It was the third time you'd woken up, still in Sungchan's room. On the desk was a cup of water and a change of clothes–you were still naked under the covers. You got out of bed, put on your clothes, and drank the water. 

Your brain was still full, wondering about what to do about tonight… Tonight, seven handsome men would have their way with you. And you had to choose which one to have as a boyfriend... The whole situation sounded like a bad movie–but this was your bad movie. Sungchan, Anton, Seunghan, Eunseok, Shotaro, Sohee, and Wonbin. All of Riize wanted you. And you felt guilty for wanting each of them too. How could you possibly choose?

A knock at the door pulled you out of your thoughts. 

Anton poked his head through as he opened the door."Hey, y/n? I thought you might be hungry, so I cooked you something." Your stomach answered before you could. The thought of food sounded amazing right now. Anton put the plate on the desk–pancakes, Anton's specialty.

"Thanks, Anton, these look great." You stabbed at the pancakes with a fork and started eating as he watched you.

While picking at his nails nervously, Anton sighed before speaking. "Y/n, I don't want to make you feel like you have to choose anyone... It's a lot of pressure." Anton scooted closer to you, his dark hair dusting his eyes as he examined you. "But, if you were to choose... I-I just want you to know I'm here for you–even if you don't pick me. I'll always be here for you..."

You stopped eating, looking up at Anton. "You don't think I'd choose you?"

"I don't want to assume. The others have all of their charms, and I know I'm quiet and shy. It makes sense that you like them more."

"Anton, you're charming! You're so funny, and I love it when you play your cello for me. You're so talented and kind."

Anton's hand covered his face, trying to hide the silly expression on his face. "T-Thanks, but–"

"But nothing! Anyone would be lucky to have you."

"I don't want anyone else..." Anton's words hung in the air. Your appetite was gone, pancakes half-eaten, and your stomach rumbled ruthlessly. The pressure and guilt returned with a vengeance. "I-I didn't mean to try and make you do anything! I was just trying to be honest."

The door suddenly burst open. Sungchan was standing in the doorway. "Anton, out. We all agreed we wouldn't do anything to mess with y/n. We'd let them think."

"Keeping me in here isn't very fair, is it?"

"No one will stop you from coming outside, y/n."

"The staring is... You all won't stop looking at me when I come out. And making Anton leave for talking to me, makes me feel like I'm in jail or something."

Sungchan looked at Anton, then over his shoulder as he spotted the others around the corner trying to listen in on the conversation. "Right... Sorry, I'll tell them to try and relax. I wasn't– I didn't mean to... Nevermind." He walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

You slumped onto the desk with a sigh. "See what I mean? Everyone's so tense right now–and it's my fault. I shouldn't have done this in the first place."

Anton knelt, looking up at you. "We all want you. Not because of anything you did. All of us, in some way, liked you before you slept with us. And now that we know everyone else's feelings, we're just trying to get to you before the others... But we're also not being very considerate to you, are we?"

Anton understood you, which made you feel better, but you couldn't get over the situation. "I spend more time alone. Thanks for checking on me, Anton..."

He nodded. "Of course, call me if you need anything else. I'll leave the food here if you get hungry." He stood and left, closing the door gently behind him.

You went back to bed, drifting off to sleep for the fourth time, surrounded by only your thoughts to keep you company. You don't know how much time passed but the next time you woke up, there was a voice near you.

"You're even more precious like this..."

You laid still, eyes closed, pretending to sleep.

"What if you really don't choose me? I don't know if my heart can take it... I liked you first. So, why not pick me?" It was Wonbin, without a doubt. You felt breath on your cheek as a weight was placed on your chest. He laid his head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat. "Your heart's racing. I wonder what you're dreaming about..."

You opened your eyes and said, "Would you laugh if I said you?"

Wonbin's eyes lit up seeing you awake. "I'd love it if you dreamed of me..."

"What if I dreamed of more than you?"

"What else did you dream about?"

You hesitated, wondering if this was the right thing to say, but Wonbin's eyes encouraged you to be honest. "I dreamed about everyone. All of us were happy, together.”

"You want all of us?"

You nodded. "I don't think I can choose one of you. I love you all... And I want each of you to be mine. The same way I want to be yours."

Wonbin took your hand, placing it on his heart. "If it makes you happy, then I'll be willing to share. But, we've gotta come up with a schedule or something. Sungchan gets possessive."

"Will a relationship of eight people work?"

"Probably not forever. But if everyone loves you, then it has to." Wonbin's heartbeat was steady, and his hands were warm and soft. His smile was tender as he looked into your eyes.

"How should I tell them? They want a competition..."

"Well, how about we talk to them about it? And, we can celebrate by fucking you–as one big poly couple." Wonbin winked at you with a smirk.

You nodded as he helped you out of the bed. Fingers locked with each other, Wonbin led you out of the room. The others were all in the living room, the tense air relaxed when they all saw you.

Wonbin cleared his throat, getting everyone's attention. "Y/n has something they want to tell us. So, let's be quiet and hear him out."

You stepped into the room fully, holding Wonbin's hand for support. Sohee and Shotaro were looking at you brightly, ready to listen. Sungchan and Anton were eyeing your hand, wrapped tightly with Wonbin's. Eunseok and Seunghan were more nonchalant, not showing how they felt, but listening.

"I-I wanna ask you all. It's just too hard for me to choose one of you, and I hate the thought of losing any of you." You looked around the room, reading their faces. "I... wanted to try and have all of you. If you'd let me, I want all of you to be my boyfriends."

Seunghan looked around. "So, we're dating each other, too?"

"If you want. Or if you're just willing to share me, that's fine too."

Sungchan's jaw went slack. "So, we're all going to share you? Is that even possible?"

"I don't know..."

Wonbin stepped forward. "I already agreed to the idea. If you don't want him, feel free to say no and leave more for me. You don't have to say yes."

Anton jumped up from his seat. "Y-Yes! I say, yes." Anton's face was flushed but filled with relief. Eunseok and Seunghan agreed next. Then Shotaro. And Sohee. The last one standing was Sungchan...

"So... we're all okay with this? Sharing you? I'm not–"

"Then fuck off, Sungchan." Wonbin pulled you into his arms.

"I'm not opposed!" Sungchan stepped forward. "But I just don't know how it'll work... I want you so bad, I don't know if I can share you with the others."

You nodded. "I get that I'm asking for a lot. It's different, and I don't know if it'll work forever... But I want to try."

Sungchan approached you slowly, lifting your chin. "Are you sure?"

"Y-Yes..."

Sungchan softly kissed your lips, closing his eyes and giving you his heart. "Then, I'm on board. If it's you..."

"Scoot over, it's my turn," Seunghan said as he pushed Sungchan aside, kissing you too. One by one, your boyfriends kissed your lips as they each promised their love to you.

Wonbin cleared his throat. "Well, now that we got the hard part out the way. I've got an idea to celebrate!" Your smile immediately dropped as you remembered what Wonbin's plan was... "We should break in our new boyfriend together, right guys?"

Sungchan scooped you into his arms. "Who's got the biggest bed?"

"Wonbin's is a queen!" Sohee answered.

Sungchan carried you to Wonbin's bed as he kissed your cheeks. When he placed you on the bed, he pulled off his shirt and almost dove into you before Shotaro stopped him.

"Who's going first then? How do we decide?"

"I'll take his ass, and you guys can have the rest," Sungchan scoffed.

"Hold the fuck on, that's not right. We all get to fuck him properly, but we need something in the meantime, okay? Our baby can do that, right?" Seunghan looked at you with a smirk as you looked around at all of them.

"What should I do?"

"We'll show you..." He said as he led the charge. Seunghan kissed you as he stripped off your shirt. "Now, you've got two hands, do something with 'em." Sohee and Shotaro stepped forward, cocks out, ready for your hands as they fucked your hands the way they liked. "Good boy, lay on your back, head off the bed." You rolled over and around, making your head hang off the bed. "I've got a mouth that needs to be filled, who’s in?" Anton's fat cock slapped your cheek as he knelt to you.

"I'll try to be easier this time," He whispered as he pushed his cock into your waiting mouth.

"Eunseok, come help me here." Seunghan and Eunseok organized themselves by your legs. Eunseok under you and Seunghan over you. "He's been stretched out by dick for days, so he can take this, right?" Seunghan chuckled as he slid his cock into your ass, making you moan around Anton. "Eunseok, now you." Eunseok followed orders as he stretched you more, with two cocks in your ass.

The feeling was more than full. You were being stimulated almost everywhere–your hands, mouth, and ass were all being used.

"What about us?" Sungchan complained.

Seunghan chuckled. "I don't know, jerk each other off until you get your turn. Just be patient, we all deserve a turn inside, y/n."

Wonbin looked at Sungchan. "Yeah–no. I've got something I'm gonna do, you can jerk off and watch alone." Wonbin entered the fray, finding a spot and he started licking your cock before sucking it. Now you were being completely stimulated.

Sungchan, at first, stood proudly as he watched. But his hard dick was straining in his pants more than he could take... Before he knew it, he was jerking off to you getting fucked–loving every second. The sounds of sex were so loud in the room, you couldn't hear your thoughts. Your cock was being sucked, your hands fuck, your mouth full, and your ass was split in two... There was so much happening.

The first person to start losing it was Sohee, understandably since he was the least experienced... He was fucking your hand too fast, loving the softness of your hand and the power-high he got from controlling the pace.

"Sungchan, take Sohee's place. We don't want him busting too early," Seunghan teased as he thrust into you. His pace was the opposite of Eunseok's–when one pushed in, the other pulled out. Eunseok loved the way you squeezed him when he thrust into you. Sungchan took Sohee's place as he lazily stroked himself with your hand, still warm from Sohee's cum. The next person to cum was Eunseok. His climax snuck up on him as he came inside you, biting into your skin which made you suck harder on Anton who was sweating as he tried to hold back. Eunseok pulled out of you, and Anton took his place. Shotaro moved to your mouth and Wonbin moved your hand to jerk him off while he focused on your cock.

Even with two members down, you were still completely occupied. Anton's cock was bigger than Eunseok so he pushed deeper. The Seunghan picked up his pace, signaling he was close. "Okay, lovely, I'm gonna fill you!" He announced as he fucked through his orgasm mixing his cum with Eunseok's. As soon as he was out, Shotaro was in. Shotaro's thrusts were sharper than Seunghan's and you could feel how swollen his cock was from your mouth.

"Sungchan, I can suck you too," you offered.

"I've had enough of you sucking me, I wanna save for the best part. But I'll take a kiss." Sungchan cradled your head as he kissed you. you moaned into his mouth as Anton and Shotaro fucked into you. You tried to focus on the kiss, but your orgasm was climbing too quickly to slow down. You bit on Sungchan's tongue as your whole body tensed–squeezing the cocks in your ass and shooting cum into Wonbin's mouth.

Wonbin pulled off you with a loud pop. "That's what I wanted..."

Shotaro couldn't last long after lasting through your hand and mouth, cumming inside you as well. But before Wonbin or Sungchan could take his place, Sohee stepped back up. "I might be a little fast, y/n. I'm still sensitive, but I'll cum inside you and make you feel great." Sohee was true to his word–he came quickly after getting into you, his thick cock rubbing against Antons and being squeezed by your... He had no chance. He returned to his spot with the others, on the ground with their flaccid cocks dripping excess cum.

Wonbin took the chance to take Sohee's spot, fucking you now. Anton and Wonbin were having an unspoken competition, or it felt like it with the way they were both fucking you so fast.

"Is little Anton gonna cum soon? You're slowing down~" Wonbin Teased.

"I can do this for at least an hour," Anton grunted through gritted teeth.

Sungchan watched you cutely shaking on the bed as they fucked you. He laid your head on his leg so you didn't hurt your neck as you jerked him off. You occasionally popped his cock in your mouth to wet it, but Sungchan wouldn't let you suck on it for too long.

It was getting down to the wire in their competition. Anton and Wonbin had fucked you for almost a full seven minutes, not slowing down.

"Jeez guys, he'll pass out at this rate... Y/n, say something."

You spoked your mouth and a loud moan escaped. You tried to form a sentence but you could only throw out fragments. "I-I can't... Cock... So good... I–love my boyfriends..."

Anton and Wonbin came at the same time hearing you say that you love them. Wonbin, above you, had hair stuck to his sweaty forehead as his eyes rolled back. Anton, below you, gripped your sides so hard you screamed slightly from how he squeezed the air out of you. The two took a moment to breathe before pulling out of you and joining the pile of men. Eunseok and Seunghan put their clothes back on–even getting a snack.

Sungchan was last. "Finally... My turn," He grumbled as he turned your body with ease. "Can you handle a little more, y/n?"

"Anything... for you," You said in between breaths.

"That's my baby." Sungchan kissed you as he slotted himself between your legs. "I've been waiting so long for your sloppy hole around me, even letting them go first..."

You mewled in protest. "I-I'm not sloppy..."

"Yes, you are. See?" Sungchan pushed his cock into you, slick with all the cum in you. "So slippery, so sloppy..."

You hissed in pain. "Wait! You're too big–"

He paused. "Too big? Even after all that?" You'd seen his cock before, it was big, about the same as Anton's. So why was it so much bigger now... Was he not even all the way hard before? Sungchan scooped you in his arms, wrapping them tight around you.

"Be honest, did you get bigger?"

He chuckled. "Probably. It's not easy for me to get completely hard, most of it's just a half–like before. Just tell me if I need to slow down. You almost have it."

Wonbin spoke up. "He's lying, there's another five inches to go."

Your eyes widened at 5 inches. Your eyes were wet with tears. "S-Sungchan, I don't think I can... Please, be careful–"

Sungchan tried to smile. "Baby, you've taken so much cock already... And you want to skip me? You fucked all of them twice and I got a blowjob once." Sungchan's voice got deeper the more he spoke. "I'll make it fit." You trembled under Sungchan. "Here it comes," He cooed as he kissed you through it. He held your thighs, pushed your knees toward your head, and pushed deeper into you. You instantly clutched his massive arms, they flexed as he controlled your body. His cock filled you more than any of the members hard, reaching places none of them had, you shook and tears rolled down your face.

"How are you still squeezing me like this? Is it because of this?" Sungchan moved your hand to your stomach where you could feel a bump. "That's me, baby. Moving your guts to get inside you." Sungchan rolled his hips into you, making the bulge shift. You moaned and realized it wasn't just you. The other members of Riize were jerking off as they watched Sungchan's display of strength and size. "Make as much noise as you want." Sungchan licked your neck. "But make sure to say something if I need to stop." He pulled back slightly before pushing back into you, hitting your spot in the center. Your back arched as he put your legs on his shoulders and moved his hands to the bed you held himself up. He was planking over you as he fucked into you. Maybe it was the position or his cock. It only took three thrusts for you to cum again. "We should get you a cock ring. If not, you'll run out of cum every time we fuck."

You couldn't even register his sentence with the way you convulsed around Sungchan's cock as your boyfriend railed you. His pace wasn't too fast, but it was hard. The bed shifted, but the sound was drowned out by your whines and cries. Sungchan smirked as he got an idea, making his hand into your newest necklace which earned a gasp from you. He drank the look in your eyes as he leaned down to kiss you. You were zooming toward your next orgasm, crying. Your brain was a scattered mess.

"...M-More, p-please." You muttered.

Sungchan's eyebrows raised. "Oh, you're such a slut... You want more!?" He looked over to the others, who were jerking each other off. "Don't just stand there, your boyfriend needs a cum shower!" The members of Riize surrounded you as Sungchan fucked you. "Don't worry baby, we're all here to satisfy you." Sungchan fucked into you faster, moving toward his climax. "We'll cum all together."

Everyone agreed as they were all close.

It wasn't long before you let out a scream, as you came for the third time. Riize painted you with cum, either jerking themselves or helping each other get there. Sungchan came inside you, leaning back as he did to get as deep as possible and watch the show.

You saw white–or maybe someone's cum got in your eye. But there was nothing after. The next time you opened your eyes, you were in bed–fully clothed. Your hair was brushed, your body cleaned, and the bed was washed. Like nothing had happened. You moved to look around but there was an immense surge of pain that shot up your back, making you yelp.

"Y/n? He's up!" Wonbin shouted to the rest of the house as he entered the room. He gently moved you to your original position. "You should lay still, baby. You're not ready to walk around yet..."

Your body ached all over. "What the fuck happened!? I feel like I was hit by a bus." Your voice was hoarse, so much that it didn't sound like you were speaking.

The others trickled into the room. Sungchan knelt by you. "Hey, you okay?"

"No," You grunted.

He smiled, nervously. "I may have gone a little overboard... But you did ask for more."

"What happened?"

"You passed out from Sungchan's horse cock pushing too deep into you," Eunseok explained. The others had spread out around the bed, so they could all see. "We've been taking turns keeping an eye on you for when you wake up..."

"So, now what?" You groaned.

"Painkillers, cough drops, and service from your seven amazing boyfriends, who will get you whatever you need," Sungchan said as he kissed your hands. "I'll be your carriage, and carry you anywhere you want." You smiled at them... Your boyfriends. The feeling might've been too much, or maybe it was the pain, but you started sobbing–much to their dismay.

"Nice one, Sungchan, you made him cry." Seunghan smacked Sungchan's shoulder.

They brought you gifts and food until you were stable enough to stand. Sungchan followed you everywhere, in case you needed him to carry you. Anton played his cello for you while Eunseok brought you video games. Sohee and Wonbin sang for you while Shotaro massaged you. Seunghan would take care of you when the others weren't watching and brought you candy and any other treats you wanted.

You were so lucky to have Riize as your boyfriends...

[fanficsat12am]

when the brothers realize how much MC loves them I Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus

📜 𝙼𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃!! 📜

Lucifer & Mammon

Happy New Year everyone!! Hope ya guys had a great flippin holiday time :> As always, notes, comments, and reblogs are highly appreciated <33 Have fun reading!!

Leviathan

Putting himself down was second nature to him at this point—sometimes he didn’t even realize he was doing it. It especially got even worse after getting into a relationship with you. His mind refused to believe that anyone could ever love someone like him. 

Levi dreaded the day you’d finally see what he sees and ultimately decide to leave, but he wouldn't hold it against you. Why would you settle for someone like him when there were countless others in the three realms who could give you so much more…

“Hey, you okay?” you asked worriedly, noticing his glazed look and how his eyes had dimmed. “O-of course I’m fine! Pft, why would I be lol,” he stumbles out, trying to keep up his facade—but of course, you saw through it. 

As he tries to get back to his game he can feel your eyes piercing him. 

“I’m going to ask you how you are one more time and I would like you to answer me honestly,” gently taking the controller in his hands from him and placing it aside. “Now tell me, what’s up?”

“I-I’m sorry,” he said, the words not too foreign to his tongue. 

“If this is about last week I've already told yo-” “Ugh, that’s not what I meant…” he cuts you off, trying to find the right words. 

“I-it’s just…you could have had ANYBODY else, but instead you’re stuck with me. I can’t 1v1 Beel's body, Diavolo’s money, Asmo’s looks- heck even stupid Mammon’s got charm! I'm just Levi, the plain old third-born…” he bites his lip, trying to keep his tears at bay. His efforts proved futile as he felt its warm trickle slowly dripping down his face, one after the other.

A part of him wanted to take back everything he just said—to restart and pick a different approach. But this wasn’t another one of his games. This was real life, and in here you've only got one shot. It was game over, he knew he had lost. 

He shut his eyes tight, listening closely for the sound of you finally walking out those doors. He couldn't bear to watch you leave him. 

You shake your head at the absurdity of his words, cupping his face into your hand. “I’m not stuck with you, silly. I choose to be here.”

Opening his eyes back again he's met with you smiling at him, the sight making his heart skip a beat. 

“I’m here because I can’t get enough of you. I love how your cheeks would go red when I catch you staring at me,” you say, leaning closer and leaving a kiss on his cheek. 

“How your brows would furrow and your eyes would squint whenever you’re focused on your game,” sending a kiss by the bridge of his nose. 

You gently grab his wrist and fumble on the soft skin of his palms with the pads of your thumb. “How you’d start gesturing with your hands a lot when you talk about the latest anime you’re into,” you reminisce, another kiss now to the back of his hand. 

“How right before you fall asleep, you hold me closer and whisper to the dead of the night how much you love me,” you say as you end it with a tender kiss to his lips. 

“And each day I find myself falling for you even more. They could try to give me the whole world, but they’ll never be you. So please, stop thinking you need to earn my affection because you don't. Not now and not ever.” 

You lift his face up to meet your gaze, looking at him as if you see right through him. “There is nothing I would change about you. You are perfect in my eyes.”

He felt like his heart was about to beat out of his chest. He was left speechless, his mind going haywire with everything you had just said. 

Seeing how his brain had completely stopped working, he let his body do all the talking instead. He wordlessly wrapped you in a tight embrace, cherishing the warmth of your body against his. 

The bitter taste of the sin he was meant to represent felt absent. Levi sensed no need to be envious of others when he had someone like you to call his.

Satan

Not once had he let himself think that he could indulge himself in something such as love—for wrath did not deserve the peace of love. While love held everything together in its warm embrace, wrath tirelessly tore with its cold unforgiving hands. 

Despite their differences, there was no denying that both were blind. Just like a moth, you were entranced by the beautiful embers of his flame, blissfully indifferent to the heat. 

He stared at his reflection with disdain. The obsidian black horns adorning his head felt heavier the longer he looked, not to mention the tail that whipped mindlessly on its own. He gritted his teeth in disgust, delivering a blow to the mirror that sent it hurdling to the ground. Through his ragged breaths and the rapid beating of his heart, he hears a voice not of his own. 

"Satan?" you called, breaking him from his trance-like state. You softly closed his door behind you, hands outstretched and unsteady. 

With each step you took, he took two back—his mind screaming at him to stay away from you but his heart yearning to leap into your hold. 

"Hey, it's okay," you reassured, taking a step towards him. 

"No it's not!" he screams, backing away from your approaching form. 

Hearing the crunch of glass under the weight of his shoes, he takes notice of the mirror he broke just moments ago. Reflected on its cracked surface was a distorted image of him; a monster.

"Please, let me help," you pleaded, trying to close the gap between you. He hastily steps back, tripping on his own feet and leaving him a heap on the floor. 

"Don't come any closer!" he screams, the room shaking with the sheer volume of his voice. You kneel to his level, quickly engulfing him in your arms. 

‘Run. He doesn't deserve you. Just stay away.’ He repeated in his head like a silent prayer, hoping that by some miracle it would come true. 

But as he felt you hold him tighter, he knew you would do nothing of the sort. As he trembled in your arms, he wills himself to ask the question that had been plaguing his mind since the day you'd started dating. 

"Why?" he whispered softly, almost inaudible if not for the heavy silence of the night. "I could lose control. Why do you insist on staying? To even consider feeling anything for a monster such as myself is just…foolish."

You think about your answer carefully, knowing that what you say next will mend or break the man in your hold. "Loving someone takes courage. To trust someone with your heart and believe they would keep it safe. Keep you safe. Let the three realms call me foolish but there's no doubt in my mind that I love you, Satan. Not the Avatar of Wrath, you Satan,'' you answer truthfully, pouring every ounce of your heart into each word.  

Gently taking hold of his chin, you tilt his head up to meet your eyes. "Tell me now Satan, will you hurt me?" you ask, the demon shaking his head immediately. He wouldn't dream of ever wishing to cause harm to you. He would die first before anybody, let alone himself, hurt you. 

"Then it is not foolish of me to love you" you say, your words unfaltering. 

Tears welled in his eyes, accepting defeat at the hands of your love and melting deeper into your embrace. As he lays on your chest, he turns to face where your heart would be and whispers an oath. "I love you, MC. I shall protect you with my life" he vows, sealing his promise with a kiss.

Asmodeus

As the Avatar of Lust and the Jewel of the Heavens, he was always the talk of the town. You, on the other hand, weren’t too familiar with the gossip world. Although you knew that was going to change once you officially became a couple. 

You took no mind to it, brushing them off with a small wave knowing that the wrong move could only add more oil to their flame. But Asmo wasn’t like you. He could feel all the looks they gave him, the incessant whispers and murmurs whenever he’d turn his back. 

He typically had no care for whatever lies people have heard about him. The same could not be said though when they had the audacity to include you into the mix. It was slowly chewing away at him and he couldn’t deny the pit of doubt slowly churning inside him.

“I saw MC out with one of the brothers last week. They’ve been getting closer recently. I wonder what happened between them"

"I saw them leaving school with Simeon yesterday, I’m surprised that’d cheat on Asmo with someone like him” 

”They’ve got the most powerful people of the Devildom wrapped around their finger and they’re still with Asmo? Damn”

The final blow was realizing that everything was better without him in the picture. Your smile wasn't just bright, it was brighter, you weren't just happy, you were happier. 

He slams his door shut, sliding down the wooden surface as he feels his legs give underneath him.

‘Can’t you see? They were never the problem. No matter what you do, you could never satisfy them. Once again you've proved to be useless.’

‘You think they’d just be swayed by your face? By the number of followers you have? Underneath it all you're nothing. It's just pathetic.’

He shook his head, gripping and pulling on his delicate sand blonde hair. No matter how hard he cupped his hands over his ears, their words never ceased. His eyes pricked with tears, months of silent torture finally finding his moment of weakness.  

You on the other hand were beyond worried. You were no stranger to Asmo’s flamboyant walk outs but this was different. As you neared the door to his room, you could hear silent sobs and cries on the other side. Knocking softly, you worriedly call out to him.

“Asmo?” The sobbing stops, rendering the halls eerily silent. “Darling, what’s wrong? Can I come in?” Still no response. 

Asmo freezes at the sound of your voice, the loud thumping of his heart drowning out the constant knocking on his door. An internal conflict rages within him. Not only is the person causing all this mess of emotions on the other side of the door, but the only one who can make it all go away as well. 

“Please talk to me. I need to know that you’re alright.” Just as you’re deciding if you should get some help from the others, the door opens. From it, a hand grabs your wrist, swiftly pulling you inside and closing the door. 

Looking around, the usually bright and pinkish room was cold and dark. You could barely see anything with the only light coming from his window. 

The crisp silence of the night was cut by the uneven breathing of Asmo who was still by the door. You reach out to gently place a hand on his shoulder. 

“Sweetie?” you call, fingertips only a few milliliters away, when his voice stops you in your tracks. 

“Do you love me?” he whispers. 

“Of course I do,” you answer immediately, not missing a beat. 

You gently grab him by the shoulder and turn him to face you, your heart breaking at the sight of your lover being in so much turmoil. 

“Oh, Asmo…” your hand tenderly holds his cheek, the other wiping away the tears that have yet to cease from falling. 

“Each day, I hear another rumor about you finding somebody else…” he pauses, taking a deep shuddering breath. “If you’re going to do it, please just do it already and save me the mascara.”

He knows that watching you leave will hurt more than any hangover can ever do to him. It would be like he was falling from the pristine white gates of Celestia again, powerless as he saw all he held dear fade into a memory of what he had once had.

He could try to convince himself that the rumors were true. That you were only ever with him for his fame and looks and that he never cared about you. But of all the lies that have circulated, that would have been the biggest one.

“Honey, I’m not leaving you. Not now, not ever,” you say as you tuck a lock behind his ear. “If you think I’d ever love someone after you then I have failed in showing you how much you mean to me.”

Through blurred vision, Asmo tries to find an ounce of deceit within the windows to your soul; a malicious grin, a break in eye contact, a drop of sweat. Nothing. 

He lets out a shuddering breath he didn’t know he was holding, pressing his soft hands upon your own and interlacing it with his. It was stupid of him to ever doubt your feelings for him. To hell with what they thought of the both of you. All he cared about now was now, being here in your hold, forever.

“You’re so cute sometimes, darling…" he whispers in amusement, a small smile finally making its way onto his lips. 

“Please tell me I still look fabulous even after all that tears. Ugh, my eyes are gonna be so puffed up tomorrow!” 

You chuckle at his comment, happy to see him start coming back to you. “Still ever so stunning, My Prince.”

“Let’s stay like this for just a bit more, hm? All this crying made me tired. Then after, we can run a nice warm bath for the two of us. Doesn't that sound wonderful?” He murmured, melting more into your touch.  

“Whatever you’d like, darling,” you replied, pressing your forehead to his. 

And there you stayed, forehead to forehead, hands intertwined, just you and him in the comfort of each other's touch.

AN: Thanks a bunch for reading!! Would love to hear your thoughts in the comments <33

[doctorwhoandfairytaillover]

Loving Arms (6)

Summary: The children of Viserys I from his wife Alicent Hightower had always been lacking in affection from their parents. They simply didn't realize how much until their widowed aunt was brought into their lives. (AU where Alicent has an older sister and her kids get the love that they deserve, takes place some time after the Driftmark event)

Part VI: A Ring of Green

|| Loving Arms Masterlist ||

A/N: I sometimes struggle giving multiple characters dialogue, so I thought why not give each of the kids their own focused chapters or moments. Hope you all enjoy this part and leave a comment! I love to hear from all of you.

"Muña, would this not be easier if we did all of this by dragon instead of horseback?" Aegon whined.

"I will not have you and your siblings become layabout nobles," she replied. "This hunt is meant to put in practice your skills with the bow, equestrianship, and to learn how to skin and prepare the game that you catch. We will not be the kind of people that forget the work that is put into having a meal on our table, is that understood?"

Aegon whined a bit more with a pout.

"I don't understand whines, I need an articulate response."

The boy huffed once more, "Yes, muña. But why is it only the two of us? Why are Aemond and Halaena allowed to wait for us at the camp?"

"They will join us tomorrow but I thought this would give us time on our own to talk about whatever you like, my sweet love."

"Whatever I like? No judgement or scolding?"

"Now I question if I should scold you if that is the response," she laughs.

He frowned, "It's just... I am sure that in your time away from King's Landing that you must have heard a thing or two about all of us and I can not help but imagine of all that you must think of us. Me in particular."

"I will admit, I have heard a thing or two while in Dorne but that does not mean that I have a fully colored image of who you are" she sighed. "And if we are being sincere, I felt many things about all that I heard regarding you."

Aegon looked away in shame, "I see. And what was it exactly?"

"Pity," she shrugged. "A bit of anger, but not at you, anger at your Mother and Grandsire. Mostly I felt that I wanted to protect you but I was uncertain how to go about it. There was some helplessness as well since my husband had fallen ill and could not come to visit sooner."

"Did you not feel shame for having a lily - liver'd and slow nephew? I'm not the Realms Delight or even worthy of being considered heir" he said bluntly.

"Is that truly what you think of yourself?"

"How else am I to think of myself, muña? Mother and Grandsire are always so quick to point out my flaws and my tutors never said it, but I could sense that they thought of me as a hapless fool."

His aunt pulled at the reigns of her horse to slow the beast down to trot alongside Aegon's own horse. "Let me ask you something, and when I ask it, I need you to be completely honest with me."

"What?"

"You said that you aren't the Realm's Delight, who was given this monicker?"

Aegon looked confused, "Rhaenyra? Who else?"

"When was she given this title? And by who?"

The boy thought for a moment, uncertain as he said "My Father? It is something I have always heard said of Rhaenyra. But why is that relevant?"

"Aegon, I need you to listen closely" she said. "She was given this monicker when she was a child of eight years, simply because courtiers thought her to be sweet and beautiful." She pointed at him with a short laugh, "You are a handsome young man, quick - witted when you choose to be, and amongst a variety of courtiers and diplomats. If you gave a smile and a few well placed laughs to certain nobles, it wouldn't be long until the perception of you has changed."

"Do you want me to behave like a clay - brained, sodden - witted fool? A smile and a few laughs aren't enough to change anything" he scowled. "It would be better to run off to Essos and live a life of comfort than have to grovel for even a modicum of respect from the likes of the court vultures."

She clench her jaw in mild frustration, "I am not asking you to do anything that is more than you are capable of Aegon. I am saying that the tides can be changed with a few things, because do you think that Rhaenyra can hold onto her title for much longer?"

"Muña, you are treading a dangerous line."

"If we ever wish to see change in our lives, sweet love, then the line must be trod whenever we see the opportunity given."

The young prince was mildly frustrated and hoped to change the subject entirely, and to his good fortune in the distance Aegon spotted a buck of a substantial size.

"I think we can drop the topic, muña because I intend on catching that buck!" and with a snap of his reigns, Aegon sped forward.

His aunt sighed with a wry smile and chased after the boy and buck, "He can try all he likes but we'll finish this talk whether he likes it or not!"

The aunt and nephew duo had managed to catch up swiftly to the buck, an arrow from Aegon was able to slow it down but it was a swift arrow behind the elbow of the buck's lead leg from (Y/N) that brought the great beast down. She had the young man strap the buck on his own so that they could quickly return to camp and skin it and prepare it for consumption later.

Rather than have Aemond and Halaena take part in the preparation of the meat, their aunt was quick to have them set off with their guards to prepare the fire and find herbs that could be used. Allowing for Aegon and herself to have more time to continue their discussion.

"Have at it" she said handing Aegon her sharpened knife. "Slice along the beasts belly and let us finish our talk."

"What is there -" he struggled to cut through the flesh "To talk about. We said all that need - needed to be said."

She pointed at the spot he finished cutting, "Stick your hands in and pull out the intestines. Aegon, don't make that face."

He scowled in disgust, "I don't want to take out the intestines that is disgusting."

"What's more disgusting is this attitude" she said. "Now take out the intestines before they swell and implode, it would contaminate the rest of the venison. And don't think because we caught this stupid thing, it means I will drop our subject from earlier."

Begrudgingly, he did as he was told and plopped the bloody organs into a bucket beside the table in which they were preparing the meat. She took the dagger from him and carefully began to remove the fur from the meat while rolling it up.

"You think to - " she cut further and handed him back the knife "to little of yourself Aegon. Keep skinning."

Shakily he did so.

"I know that you have heard things and taken them to heart because no one has said this otherwise, but I truly think that you could accomplish great things. If and only if we work together to find the things that you could put your time into, not simply because it is expected of you."

"You will be sorely disappointed muña, because I have had tutors that gave up long ago."

Gently she pushed the boy aside and took another dagger to help him skin faster, "Your previous tutors lacked creativity to trod the line and failed to consider that you learn better with other methods. Not everyone can read a text and execute the knowledge, some of us do better by example and practice." She pointed her blade toward the half finished deer carcass, "Or do you mean to tell me that you knew how to skin this beast until now?"

He flushed in embarrassment, "I suppose I hadn't thought about it. The letters of texts have always jumped and I was always forced to sit for hours until I finished what was given."

"It might surprise you Aegon, but your uncle Gwayne has the same condition" she chuckled. "He was never much for sitting still at a desk and couldn't get through a page without the letters mixing around. Thankfully our Uncle noticed and found other ways that Gwayne excelled, making my brother quite the formidable swordsman and knight."

Aegon chewed at his bottom lip in thought, "Is it possible then? For me to truly be accomplished? Even if it isn't in the areas that my Mother and Grandsire want?"

"It is why I argued with your Father" she said. "I knew that there were expectations but I know that together we can create reasonable goals that can lay the way towards a future you want to reach." Setting aside the blade in her hand, (Y/N) washed her hands free of the blood from skinning the deer and dried them quickly.

"If you really think that I can muña, then I would like to try, please?"

Gently and lovingly she cupped his face in her hands, "All I want is for you to try. Don't give up because others say that you cannot or because they have set the limits for you."

"It's difficult when all your life it feels that everyone is waiting for you to make the next mistake," he teared up and pressed into her embrace. "I already think that about myself every day that I awake."

"Sweet love, can you look at me?"

Nervously his eyes met her own.

Slowly she reached into the pocket of her skirt and procured a ring to show it at his eye level. Its stone was a yellow green peridot, the prongs were a bronze while the rest of the ring was a faded silver.

"I know that perhaps I pushed quite a bit at some of your boundaries today," she began. "But the main reason I had your brother and sister do other things today was because of this." Carefully she took one of his hands and placed the ring onto his palm, "Aegon? Would you be my heir?"

His eyes widened and he looked at her in shock, "You want me to be your heir?"

"In the grand scheme of things, I don't have quite as much to my name but I am asking you, my sweet Aegon if you would be my heir? I am giving you a choice, become the boy that they wish for you to be or the man that I know you can become with the right guidance."

He sniffled softly, "My Father wanted a son but has never wanted me. The realm has their flawless heir and despite all this, somehow you want me? Flaws and all to be your heir?"

"The choice is yours."

With a teary laugh, Aegon put the ring of green onto his pointer finger in admiration. "I hope you know that you are never getting this back, muña."

"And I would never ask, sweet love. It absolutely suits you."

There was no fanfare from trumpets, cheers from adoring peasants or nobles, and certainly no flowers tossed in the air. But in that moment; the muggy tent, sticky entrails, and slightly too big ring were enough for the young prince.

Someone he loved had chosen him.

And for him, that was enough.