#i don't care much for these anymore but inspiration to all

[chaostudee]

controversially young girlfriend, lewis hamilton.

summary : the media crticizes y/n and lewis when they start dating due to their significant age gap. faceclaim : tyla a/n : been in the drafts for awhileeee also this is lowkey rly short so lmk if u want part 2?

y/nusername i can't call rn i'm doing hot girl shit

liked by sabrinacarpenter, addisonrae, gracieabrams and 3,678,447 others.

sabrinacarpenter angel face 👼

user728 ughh so so fine

user42 omg imagine serving this harddd

username22 she knows she's badd

user34 oml so so obsessed with u i acc cant

username99 mother

y/nlover more music plsss

user68 my icon my legend

username frrrr she's literally like my inspiration in life

lewishamilton we had decent race pace today but wasn't enough to convert a win. we will evaluate what mistakes we made and we will come back stronger

liked by charlesleclerc, georgerussell, francocolapinto and 5,829,620 others.

user727 my goat 🐐🐐

f1fan it's a struggle to be a lewis fan rn

user88 i'm so sick of the p10 curse i acc can't anymore

f1lover changeee your fucking car

georgerussell 💪

justanichident oh how i love britcedes

user89 still and will always be a legend

username11 we need more roscoe content lewis !!

y/nusername had the best time in brazil love you all ! 🇧🇷

liked by chappellroan, sabrinacarpenter, laufey and 3,818,919 others.

user727 aaaagh had the best time ilysmm

user99 her fits always devour

username22 obsessed with u acc

f1 we know this diva 💜

user728 F1 WHAT ARE U DOING HERE f1fan omggg y/n in the paddock when?? username28 omggg don't tease us like this

user782 what a cutie patootie

user44 ughh to be her

user62 LOVE LOVE LOVE HER

username26 ughhh she's so mother

y/nusername make me lose my breath make me water

liked by lewishamilton, sabrinacarpenter, madisonbeer and 4,829,728 others.

user727 GUYS OMGG LEWIS LIKED AND FOLLOWED HER

user44 damnnnn

username can we just collectively agree to dress like this 24/7

user62 WAIT GUYS THE CAPTION

user99 omggg is it a new song tease username526 i'd die stoppp

username90 serving cunt

user414 oh i'm so ready for ny show

f1 interview with lewis hamilton after las vegas gp

liked by f1fan, justaninchident,user78 and 752,629 others.

user62 OMG OMG

username FREAKING TF OUT

user44 omggg i'm so ready to see bf lewis

f1lover guys he literally asked for privacy so let's respect it

user33 🙌

user99 betcha it's y/n

y/nusername nyc ily so so much !!

liked by lewishamilton, gracieabrams, wiffygriffy and 6,292,628 others.

user72 OMG WE WON

username a new single announcement healed me

user673 hearing y/n live was utterly insane she literally sounds angelic wtff

gracieabrams so so obsessed with you 💕

username42 yummy

user99 need her actually

sabrinacarpenter mwah mwah lysm

y/nusername xxxx

user52 the choreeography was so fucking good

username66 omggg yes like someone teach me those moves pls 😫

y/nusername last week on tour doesn't feel real 😭💗

liked by lewishamilton, alexandrasaintmleux, chappellroan and 8,626,526 others.

f1fan sir lewis hamilton IS THAT YOU?!?

user727 girlll whaaaaat

user42 soft launching THE lewiz hamilton is crazyyy

username25 isn't there like a 15 year age gap 😭

user25 omggg wait you're right user626 ewwww

user62 i applaud you y/n for giving us pic of lew

username omlll his tats i can't

user52 knawing at the bars of my enclosure username22 plsss 💀💀

lewishamilton 🫶

liked by y/nusername, charlesleclerc, landonorris and 9,720,562 others.

user728 OMG A HARD LAUNCH

user82 holyyy shittt

username89 wowza didn't think that he had it in him

f1fan the age gap is wilddd

username22 y/n's face card is actually insaneeee

f1lover summer break (lewis's version)

user62 back tats 🫠

lewishamilton

》 awww y/n's so so cute

》 15 years between you's is crazy

》 she could literally be your daughter.....

》 pls take good care of her

y/nusername in light of all the backlash on online that both i and lewis have recieved i have decided to take a break from social media. i will be back but for now this is goodbye. i love you all sm see you soon <3

liked by lewishamilton, sabrinacarpenter, landonorris and 12,682,720 others.

sabrinacarpenter i'm always here for you ❤️

user62 stopp wait no i kinda feel bad

username hope u guys are happy because this is what happens when you all hate for no reason

f1fan so sry you guys are being treated like this

user72 i'm going to miss you so so much

username12 ya'll really made her to do this like wtfff guys

f1lover they both don't deserve this

madisonbeer proud of you for speaking out and putting them in their place

user672 yesss queen shit

user89 fit still slaying tho

username44 take all the time you need we will be waiting for you <3

taglist ⭑.ᐟ

@lottalove4evelyn

@mxryxmfooty

@sweetestgirlintown111

@hadidsworld

@llando4norris

@nichmeddar

@janeh22

@love2readd

@depressedriches

@seonghwaexile

[kaelidascope]

On one hand, I'm relieved to see that it isn't just me suffering in the engagement department whereas I used to get flooded with comments and the like every time I dropped something. It isn't the only reason why I've moved from fanfic work to original work, but it is part of it. The last round of engagement on the latest MM chapter was abysmal, and while I know it's not a reflection of my quality in writing, I kept beating myself up over the possibility that I took too long to update it and people gave up on it/forgot/fell out of love with my work because I as a creator was not performing good enough. It drove me into a bit of a depression for a while.

On the other hand, this is making me rethink my stance on never telling my favorite authors how much they have inspired me to take off with my writing career. This is going to get a little lengthy but I want to talk about it so bear with me here.

Closed circles know how much of an insane, unhinged fan I am of certain writers, yet I have never actually said a word to them. I think I left one comment on maybe two fics that went unanswered (which is fine. They're not active in the fandoms I'm in anymore and I'm just some guy out of probably hundreds all saying the same thing. They're not gonna reply to me) but apart from that, you wouldn't catch me dead actually admitting how much the works mean to me. But why?

I guess I was far too proud and too terrified of being let down if I exposed myself like that. Despite the fact that these authors were literal catalysts for borderline impossible feats I have done within the last year, WELL RECEIVED FEATS at that, I swore I'd never tell anyone how inspiring they were for me. (Unless a casual friendship has been established. I have had the tremendous honor to able to talk to some of my inspirations one on one but under incredibly lucky circumstances)

I had a scenario in my head that these were the cool kids, and if you ever got picked on at all for admiring anything, you know damn well you never tell the cool kids about your admiration. I was afraid that they'd take one look at the work that was inspired by theirs and laugh at it in their enclosed circles. I wasn't going to risk having my confidence crushed and lose the motivation to continue working on my projects by being a fan.

I know not all authors do this. Every time someone comes to me and tells me I've inspired them to be a better writer, I literally frame it in a collection of screenshots I have saved on a hard drive. Every. Single. Time. And I know anyone else would tell me that if the person I admire would actually be cruel enough to mock an up and coming writer, then they're not worth admiring. Which I agree with! But try telling that to sensitive little Kaeli that safeguards their interests with the fiery defensiveness of a feral bear on cocaine.

But then I see posts like this, and I put myself in their shoes. I don't know them. They could be a jackass but they could also be like me - someone who bases a lot of motivation for project completion based off of whether or not people even care to see it completed.

This is all a very long, round about away to say that who cares if the author you build a mini-shrine for in your brain thinks your cringe for liking their work? Odds are they probably need to hear that you liked it so much, it inspired you to do something with that feeling. We all need to hear it. They inspired you and now you're making something that will inspire someone else. To be a creator is to share that passion everywhere you go. There's nothing cringe about it.

A writer friend told me something that broke my heart a little bit today; they're going to quit publishing their fanfic.

My instant thought was that they had been trolled or attacked or that something terrible had happened in their life because this person is so passionate about their writing. It wasn't any of that. Engagement with their works has been going down, as it has for many of us. Comments are like gold dust a lot of the time, and just looking through the historical comment counts on old fics on ao3 demonstrates this trend very clearly. It was not simply the comments dropping off which caused them to decide to stop posting, however.

My friend came across a discord server for their fandom (I should point out here that their fandom interest and mine diverged a couple of years ago, we stay in touch but don't currently read each other's posts because I'm not into their fandom and they would rather gouge their eyes out with a wooden spoon than read anything Star Wars) and specifically to share fic in that fandom. They joined, because we all love a good fic rec, only to discover that their latest multichapter fic, which has almost no comments and very few kudos, is being hotly discussed in this server as one of the best stories ever. Not one of these people has bothered to say this to them on the fic. When they asked, none of participants could see the point in telling the author of the fic they apparently loved so much that they love it.

This discovery has absolutely destroyed my friend's love of sharing fic. They share because they love seeing other people's enjoyment, and fic writers do that through comments and kudos/reblogs/likes because we don't get paid. There is no literary critic writing a blog post/article about how amazing the story is for us to copy and keep/frame. There is no money from royalties. All we have are the words of the people reading our works.

Those people on that server could have taken five minutes of the time they spent gushing about how amazing my friend's story was to other people and used it to tell the one person guaranteed to want to hear that praise how much they loved it. They could have taken a moment to express their opinion to the person who spent hours upon hours plotting, writing, editing, and posting those chapters. Instead, they deprived my friend of thing that keeps them sharing their writing, and in the process have killed their love of it. My friend now feels used and unmotivated.

I won't be sharing a link to their fic, they said I could share their experience but not their identity. I know they plan to post one final chapter. I know they intend to express their hurt at being excluded from the praise for the thing they created, and I know they intend to announce that as a consequence they will not be posting for a long while, if at all.

So please, I beg you, don't hide your love of a story from the writer. It's just about the only thing we have.

[shycroissanti]

IRINA GONSHIRA🌌💙

✨️A "little" about her✨️

Answering @yaegxr 's ask💖

AAAA I'M SO HAPPY YOU LIKE HER!!🥹💖

Well, I don't have the complete story yet (because I'm not associating my OCs with Demon Slayer anymore exactly because now I'm focusing on a totally original story - but I can still write a little about this version of it), and also my blog is still a bit messy, but nothing stops me from writing now!!

Starting with the basic information!!

Name: Irina Gonshira

Age: 19 years old

Height: 1.70m

Birthday: August 23

Family:

Yuliya Gonshira - mother

Masato Gonshira - father

Liliya Gonshira - younger sister

Dmitry Gonshira - cousin

History:

Irina has always been a cheerful and determined girl. She comes from a rich and powerful family (Yuliya is one of the best demon hunters, and Masato is a very famous architect/engineer there)

Inspired mainly by her mother, since she was little, Irina had the dream of being like Yuliya, strong and able to protect everyone around her, so she starts training from a very young age, which irritated her father, who did not support her (and this generates conflicts throughout the story).

At a certain point, Irina meets Kishin, an orphan boy who was bullied by almost everyone in the orphanage where he lived, but the worst of all was Kenta, another orphan boy. Irina saves Kishin and soon the two become very attached to each other, creating a very strong friendship. And at the same time, creating a huge rivalry with Kenta.

Later, around the age of 15 to 17, Irina's life would become total chaos.

First, Yuliya had to leave for an extremely important mission, leaving her entire family behind. Since then, Irina has never heard from her mother again.

Soon, she suffered the comet incident (comic) , where a comet hit her in the middle of the forest while she was walking at night. She almost died, but the comet's energy kept her alive and changed everything in her body and mind. Irina feels more energetic and much more outgoing, even becoming much more impulsive and noisy. This energy is great for keeping her strong and ready for anything, but it is also very dangerous, because if she cannot control her feelings properly, Irina feels a strong burning sensation throughout her body, which hurts her a lot (in other words, she has "super powers" that help her and at the same time destroy her).

Another thing that happened is that her beloved friend, Kishin, turned into a demon (he had no other option, he became a demon against his will - comic ). Kishin knew that Irina's dream had always been to be a demon hunter, and now that he was one, he believed that she would hate him and that they could never be together again, so he tried to avoid her all day, because he didn't know what to do, he didn't want to end his beloved Irina's dreams.

While this was happening, at Irina's house, Masato was already tired of everything, having lost his wife (who in truth Masato didn't even care much about Yuliya at that point) and because Irina was a great disappointment to him. So Masato came up with a plan to get rid of Irina. He told her that she should leave and go on a supposed mission far away from there so that she could be part of the Sunlights (in this case, the Sunlights are like the Hashiras, but in the Sunlight Force universe). Irina believed her father without hesitation, so she left home soon after, and finally went looking for Kishin, because she couldn't leave him like that without telling him. Irina was already sad about everything that was happening, so she finally found Kishin, and her world fell apart completely.

Kishin was desperate. He tried to do everything, promise her that he would never do anything like the demons do, and he, heartbroken, said that he could leave and live in isolation if she wanted. At that point, Irina breaks down, her sense of reality was completely altered. She always heard Yuliya's stories about how all demons are evil and must be defeated, but seeing her beloved Kishin like that, she could never do something like that (and even more so because she noticed that Kishin was still the same guy she always loved), so Irina hugs him and promises that they will stay together, that it doesn't matter if he was a demon and she wanted to be a Sunlight, she dreamed of protecting those she loves, and she loves him, so the two stayed together and nothing would separate them.

So since Irina needed to go on the "mission" that Masato had told her and Kishin could no longer live there, the two left the city, and thus the various adventures that I have been writing about have happened.

Now some fun facts!

Irina's favorite food is tamago sando.

Irina is afraid of onions.

She loves collecting rocks.

She likes to cook, but she often burns all the pies she makes.

Sorry, I guess I got excited to write about her xD But still, you can always find more stuff about her with the tag #Irina Gonshira or check out my other blog @shycroissanti-comics , there are all the arts and comics I've ever made :D

Sorry if I wrote a lot of things wrong (〃ﾉωﾉ)

And please consider helping me by reblogging thisﾟ+.(*´pωq`)ﾟ+.💖💖

[lawofangie]

I need some advice

Our 3D is just a reflection of our assumption and I have proven it to myself and have seen few evidence of it too like I yesterday manifested brownies

But I couldn't manifest being in void from past 3 months almost and this is frustrating me a lot now I don't know why but I am like yeah I will be in void but whenever I assume that I am going to get in it on this day or like that I just couldn't belive myself that it is happening or will happen and I just need some genuine advice

I ha,ve manifested shit even after reacting to 3D in 4 days but this is getting on my nerves and I need some advice

By The way read your story and it is inspiring and the things happen to you were not what you deserved but am happy for you still

Bye

i've never understood why you guys care so much about that stupid void stuff. it's not the end all be all of manifestation, it's just a fucking method, like affirming, visualizing, scripting, SATS, etc. it means nothing. i truly do not understand the craze, the hype, watching people post about it and people try their hardest to get in such a state feels like watching the blind lead the blind.

if the void state isn't working for you, then just give up? no method has more significance than another, no matter what you do, the end goal is assuming you have something and it materializing. what does the void state have to do with any of that? why do you care so much?

what does the void state have to do with you achieving your dream body, your sp, money, clear skin, your dream house, dream job, what does the void state itself have to do with any of that? what is the law of assumption even about? do you even remember at this point?

the reason why you can't get into that void thing is because manifesting is about assuming, which is believing something to be true before seeing it with your own eyes (which is similar to a prediction). if you wait expectantly for something to happen, you aren't making an assumption. plain and simple. waiting for something to happen every night for 3 months defeats the purpose of making an assumption.. because waiting for something to be true, again, isn't assuming. you're supposed to already decide that it is.

i really don't know how else to put it. it just gets to a point where you guys don't even understand what you're doing anymore. if a method (a way of doing something) isn't working for you, then simply try something else? i honestly don't understand why this thought hasn't crossed your mind on your own.

in any other context, would this make any sense? you keep doing something that obviously isn't working for you until it somehow works for you, even though you already know it doesn't or it's taking too long? wouldn't it make more sense to just find another way?

this is the issue. you guys put this thing on a pedestal as if it means something, when just like any other method, it's just a way of doing something. that's all a method is, a way of doing something in order to achieve something. the purpose of using a method is to help you achieve something. so i truly don't understand why you've been trying and failing to use a method for 3 entire months. what significance does the void state truly have to occupy so much of your time? how is this more special than any other method?

and once you reach the void, what then? is it really worth stressing yourself out every night when people are literally manifesting their desires overnight by simply deciding they have them? while you've been waiting for a stupid method to work for you for the past 3 months? you are TRULY wasting your time.

you clearly are already understanding the law and proving it to yourself, so why not just keep doing that? if you've already found what works, then why are you changing? i don't get it. what do you gain in the end?

[sweetbillwriting]

The Key To His Heart - VII

Characters: AU Bill Skarsgård where his life changes in 2013 and later 2019.

Setting: L.A, 2024 but in an alternative universe with Bill having a completely different life.

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, heavy themes.

Notes: It took some time for me to write this chapter but it feels like inspiration is back and I will have more time in December.

Bill could feel the smile on his lips already when he woke up. It felt like the sun was shining on him even if the dark curtains didn't allow any light in. He could see Sienna's face in his mind just as clearly as if she had been lying next to him, and it made him stretch out a hand to feel if she was there. The only thing his hand met was the edge of his laptop, still upright and opened. Like teenagers, they hadn't been able to say goodbye to each other and instead slept next to each other. They had played some sort of horny, silly game where they prepared for bed together and also could show their naked bodies to each other. They really were like teenagers, and Bill could still feel a stiffness in his member. She was so beautiful, and he couldn't understand why she was so shy about letting him see her body, especially the scar from her c-section. He loved it; it showed a story, a part of her, and he couldn't wait to drag his fingertips over it. He looked at the laptop screen, seeing that she had left the chat. He wasn't surprised because she had probably left her son in school and gone to her other job, as a babysitter to a rich family’s two-year-old son. Being a painter didn't always give her enough money to support herself, so she worked for them when it was needed. He was impressed by how she didn't let her dream go, even if it was hard. Her passion was sexy in his eyes.

Bill stood up from bed, still naked after their little game, and walked to the shower. He couldn't stop thinking about Sienna, so he didn't even think about needing to date six other women. Or now it was seven, but he didn't know that until he walked down to the kitchen for breakfast with them all and met Sandra by the stairs.

She had gone home to take care of her father, who had fallen down the stairs, but now she stood there with glowing red hair in a simple white dress. She was beautiful, but nothing could compare to Sienna, even if she most often was dressed in a big t-shirt and soft shorts when they were talking. Bill once again realized how much he actually liked her; he didn't even look at other women the same way anymore.

“Hey?” He said, confused, while walking down the stairs. Sandra looked up at him with a smile.

“I'm back..!” She sang playfully and turned towards Bill, who scratched behind his ear. One more woman to disappoint.

“Yeah.” He forced a smile, but she didn't seem to notice and stretched out her hand towards him. Bill took it doubtfully and gave her a friendly hug.

“How is your father?”

“He’s okay. Now. Or okay enough, he thought I should come back here, so I did.”

Bill smiled, surprised. He couldn't really see how a father could encourage his daughter to fight against other women for a man. He himself thought his daughters were way too good for that.

“Don't let him be wrong,” she teased and twirled her hair between her fingers. Bill laughed, an acted laugh, but then looked towards the kitchen, where he could see Esmeralda looking at them. A lump formed in Bill's stomach. He really didn't want to fool them, but he felt obligated. He just needed to get this done. The next day he would go to New Jersey and finally have Sienna in his arms.

Bill said good morning to all of them but lingered on Esmeralda, who watched him with a warm smile. She would have been the girl he would have picked in the end; he could feel it in his bones, but everything changed the day Sienna came to his bedroom. He hadn't even given her his full attention before that, but everything changed then and there because he could feel himself becoming the man he actually wanted to be by just being in her presence.

“Do you want some coffee?” Asked Rose sweetly, and he looked down at the short girl.

“Yeah, yeah, that would be great,” he answered with a small smile. Coffee was exactly what he needed. Or a whiskey.

They sat down by his long dinner table for breakfast. He could hear them all small talk but not about what. For some paranoid seconds, he imagined them talking about him and Sienna but shook that off.

“Ehm, Bill?”

He looked up at Tiffany’s friendly face next to him. She looked embarrassed, but he realized quickly it was secondhand embarrassment for him.

“You've spilled some yogurt on your shirt…”

He looked down on his dark blue t-shirt, where now dripples of white yogurt stained his chest. He had been too lost in his own thoughts and sighed loudly. He knew he could be clumsy but had hoped it wouldn't come out in front of the women, and especially not be shown on TV.

“Fuck…” He took his napkin to try to rub it away, but a white stain stayed there and reminded him how bad his situation was.

Odette stopped next to him, looking at the stain then his face. She had an envelope between her fingers but was doubtful if she should give it to him at that moment. Bill gave her a strained smile and took the envelope. Better to just get it done. He stood up after he had opened it and read out loud:

“Good morning! No one has missed that you seven women here again, and we welcome Sandra back to the Skarsgård residence…” Bill looked up at Sandra, and some of the girls gave her a halfhearted applaud. No one was really happy to see her, but Bill was the only one who succeeded in looking like he was.

“To welcome her back, she will be the woman going out with Bill on this day.”

Bill looked up and met Violet's eyes. She didn't look that happy at all, and he had heard from Herman that she was annoyed they would once again be leaving his home that weekend. Bill thought to himself that she would have been even more upset if she knew his plans for the weekend. Bill then looked at Maria, who instead looked at Sandra. He could see irritation in her eyes while Sandra just smirked, pleased. He thought to himself that the competition really brought out the worst in the women.

×××

Sandra is back, and I must go out on a date with her. I don't even know her, really. Is she nice? She gives me a bad feeling, but maybe that's just because I don't want to be here.

He sent the message to Sienna and got a quick answer back.

She's nice, but I think she's been a bit irritated that she hasn't gotten so much attention from you. She seems to be irritated with many of the girls also. And she hated that I always sang haha.

Bill smirked to himself while he dressed for the date. He had heard her sing those times they left their call on while they were doing mundane things. She could hit notes, but it was nothing special. It hadn't annoyed him at all and didn't become more than just a background sound.

They continued their conversation, mostly about Sienna's work day and plans for the weekend, while Bill made himself ready for the date. Talking to Sienna made it easier, and it felt less like he cheated on her.

He met Sandra on the porch. They had been told to dress up, but he wasn't prepared for her to wear a long-sleeved sequin dress in silver. He himself wore a light gray suit and a white t-shirt to dress it down a bit. She smiled brightly at him and stood up on her toes in her silver heels to kiss his cheek.

“I've looked forward so much to this!” She said excitedly and took his hand in hers. It was obvious she was really comfortable with touching him, a thing not many of the girls had been. Bill smiled and hugged her hand in his.

“Me too; it feels like we haven't talked that much, and then you left and Sienna and—”

He swallowed hard. Why did he bring Sienna up? Oh right, because he couldn't stop thinking about her and probably just searched for a reason to talk about her.

“...It has been a lot, but now you're back and things will probably calm down,” he added, laughing a little to cover up his mistake. Sandra smiled and laughed too. They were driven in a limousine to their dating spot, a big yacht decorated with fairy lights; light Sandra's sequin dress caught.

“Oh my god! That's so pretty!” Said Sandra and took his hand while they moved to the boat. Bill just smiled and once again thought about Sienna. He knew she had promised her son pizza that night just because he would be sleeping at his grandma's place the whole weekend, so the two of them could have alone time. He looked at Sandra's beautiful profile and then at the yacht. He would rather eat greasy pizza with Sienna and her little son.

Sandra and Bill talked about light subjects, like fashion because of her work and literature because of his work. She was cultivated and intelligent, but still Bill didn't feel a thing. He had always been a monogamist, and when he liked a woman, everyone else faded into the background. He knew it was what was happening; Sienna had taken over his mind, and in such a short time she had wrapped him around her finger.

“So Sienna also left?” Sandra suddenly asked. It felt like he hadn't been completely present until he heard her name, and he looked at Sandra with big eyes.

“Yeah, yeah.” He answered and nodded slowly. “Personal reasons...” he added and continued to nod. Sandra looked at him in silence. She looked after microexpressions because even if Bill was a good actor, he had shown something when he said Sienna's name. A flash of something had come over his otherwise neutral expression. He could smile and laugh with them all, but this was another positive feeling that was shown in his eyes that she hadn't seen before but that she now could see again.

“Were you disappointed?”

“Hm?” Bill looked at Sandra, trying to win time, and Sandra instead realized she needed to broaden her question to not make it seem like she accused him of something.

“Did you get disappointed when both of us left?”

“Of course. I hadn't spoken much with anyone of you, and Sienna chose to leave-”

Bill swallowed hard. Once again, he had led the conversation to Sienna. “And you were probably in distress because of your father…”

He played around with his food on the plate.

On a boat near them sat Herman in front of a screen, seeing Bill's obvious discomfort, and bit his fist. He could see on Sandra's face that she was suspicious of his behavior. Herman could also see that his friend was really trying to act interested in the date, but Sandra was too quick with reading him.

“Have you even talked?” Asked Sandra after a minute of silence. Bill looked up at her. The candlelight reflected in his big green eyes, and he licked his plump lips. His beauty made Sandra just irritated at that moment, and she crossed her arms.

“Not much when she was here, but everything changed-” Bill sighed deeply. He should have pretended like he didn't understand her question, but his heart seemed to want to talk instead of his head. “Fuck…” he said and dragged his hands over his face.

Sandra scoffed and shook her head in disbelief.

“I came back to a guy who’s hung up on a girl who actually left? By her own choice?”

“It's not that easy,” said Bill with an apologetic voice and looked at her stressed when she stood up from the chair.

“I guess not because here we are, even if you clearly aren't interested in anyone other than her!”

“It wasn't planned, and the production-”

“Bill, Bill, Bill…” Shouted a cameraman and stopped him from talking. Bill looked at them in belief they had stopped filming.

“We don't talk about the production,” continued the cameraman with a headset on, clearly getting directions from someone else. Bill sighed and looked at Sandra, who sat down but with crossed arms.

“Turn this boat around or I will report you for kidnapping,” she said determingly. Bill looked at her, then the cameraman. A few minutes later, the boat turned around.

“I'm sorry, Sandra…” said Bill lowly and dragged a hand over his neck.

“Yeah, yeah. All men are assholes after all,” she accused bitterly. Bill didn't say anything because it wasn't worth the debate. He was, after all, a bit of an asshole.

×××

Bill was really nervous the next morning that Sandra would have spilled the beans to all the women and he would meet an angry mob when he walked down the stairs, but there was nothing like that. Once again, he took his round of saying goodbye to them before they would leave. Neither seemed to be upset. Maria looked hurt though when he moved away when she tried to kiss him, and she wasn't the only one who tried doing that. Esmeralda also tried when she sat down in his lap in her bed. Bill smiled strained when she moved up in his lap, feeling her thigh push against his crotch. He moved carefully so she wouldn't sit as close.

“Is it something?” She asked nervously when he moved, so she sat further out on his thigh.

“No, no. It was just uncomfortable,” he said with a low chuckle.

“Oh,” she laughed softly and dragged her hand over his back.

“It feels like we haven't got so much time together this week. Like, I kind of thought I was your favorite,” she teased and gave him a small smirk. Bill laughed and scratched his ear in discomfort, but Esmeralda just interpreted that as him not being able to talk about that. She knew he couldn't say what he felt in that way, but she was quite sure she was his favorite. It was either she or Tiffany.

“Will you get home this weekend?” He asked, and Esmeralda made a face.

“Yeah, I guess I must. I would rather stay here, with you.”

Bill smiled but felt his heart beat due to bad conscience.

“Yeah…” he said and nodded a little.

“But I understand you want to see your daughters. Of course. And I want to see my son,” she continued, and Bill continued to nod.

“I know you can't talk about your date with Sandra, but... She is a weird one.” Esmeralda lowered her voice like she was afraid someone would hear her. Bill swallowed hard, once again afraid Sandra had said something.

“She acted this morning like she knew you would pick her or something and told us that “we're just here because you can't force us out." Esmeralda laughed in disbelief, shaking her head. She was sure Bill didn't have an interest in Sandra, so Sandra's words didn't make sense. Bill furrowed his brows and faked confusion. He laughed a little, even if he knew Sandra meant something else.

“I can't really talk about this with you, but... That was a strange thing to say,” he just said and patted Esmeralda's thigh. He did it as some sort of apology but stopped when he thought about Sienna. Even such a thing felt wrong.

“It's time to say good-bye now,” he said and demonstratively looked at his watch. Esmeralda nodded and leaned in to kiss his lips, but Bill steered his face away and gave her a hug. Esmeralda tried again, but Bill did the same thing. She looked at him confused and smiled a little, wondering what had changed.

Bill took a deep breath before going to Sandra's room, afraid it would turn into a confrontation, but met an empty room. He wondered silently if she would come back. It didn't really matter if he was honest.

×××

Bill took the flight to New Jersey later that day, a six-hour flight that made his back hurt and his knees sore from the seat in front of him. He hated flying coach and rarely did, but it had been the flight that would have taken him to New Jersey the fastest, where Sienna would wait for him at the airport. While waiting on his suitcase by the conveyor belt, his nerves started to itch his skin. Maybe it would be totally different in reality? Maybe he wouldn't feel a thing? Was it possible it was just a hangup and he would regret every sweet word he had said to her? He almost missed his suitcase because of his loud thoughts but took it and moved towards the exit where Sienna would wait for him, even if his nerves pulled him in all different directions.

He didn't see her at first, and he joked with himself that she had left when she had seen him. He didn't really want to confess to himself; it was a real worry, but it was just then he saw her. She wore a white tube top and a denim skirt, perfectly matching his white t-shirt and jeans, and had her shoulder-length hair up in a half-updo. She smiled brightly, and Bill could feel how his nerves changed from pessimistic to optimistic and almost drunkenly excited. She was gorgeous. He felt his heart beat like a drum in his chest and his fingers around the handle of his suitcase shook. Was he in love already? Could it be so fast?

“Hey…” said Sienna shyly and looked up at his broad smile. She giggled a little, and he felt his confidence go up.

“Hey Sienna,” he said and played with the handle of his suitcase. They watched each other closely, just as full of hormones as teenagers, and Bill finally dared to lay his hand on her cheek and bend down to kiss her glossy lips. She giggled excitedly into the kiss, and Bill smiled and kissed her again more determined. He let his forehead linger against hers and looked into her hazel eyes.

“Shit Sienna… God, what are you doing to me?”

She smiled brightly, and this time she took the initiative to kiss him, but Bill was the one to deepen it, so they stood and made out way too intimately at the airport. It felt like they had waited so long to be near each other, even if it was just two weeks. They already knew so much about each other; still, this was the first time they actually touched each other. Bill felt a stir in his lower belly and knew it was time to stop. He made a humming sound when they pulled away from each other, and Sienna dragged her hands over his muscular chest.

“Wow,” she said with almost a moan, and Bill smiled playfully. He had thought he knew what he searched for in the show, but this was so much more. None of the other girls had been close to making him feel this way. It felt like he was flying while they walked hand in hand to Sienna's little Kia.

×××

Bill didn't care that they lived different kinds of lives, that he earned more money, had a more luxurious lifestyle, and lived bigger, but it was obvious Sienna was embarrassed when he looked around in her small one-bedroom apartment. The bedroom was her son's room, a kid's bed, and a desk with zebra toys standing in a row, from biggest to smallest. One of the walls was covered with Winnie the Pooh with friends. It was made by Sienna, and Bill smiled to himself. The living room was so small her couch stood in line with her bed. She had a smaller TV, but otherwise the living room was full of canvases, both painted and empty ones.

“I've tried to find a bigger apartment, but..." She stretched the truth while trying to find a place for Bill's suitcase. Her eyes were downcast, gazing at the floor the whole time. Bill took her hand in his and pulled her close to his body.

“You really inspire me, you know that?” He said it with a smile. Sienna furrowed her brows and laughed in disbelief.

“Yeah? Thinking about writing about someone poor?” She laughed again and looked away. Bill took hold of her chin and gave her a kiss.

“You fight for your dream and do it well. You work hard and embrace your talent.”

Sienna smiled with a blush and then kissed him again.

“You explained yourself now.”

Bill chuckled and shook his head.

“Shut up.”

“Did you tell me to shut up?” She said, amused, and looked at him with big eyes.

“Yes.” He looked at her with sultry eyes and then kissed her passionately. Sienna let go of his suitcase so it fell to the floor and as she drowned in his kiss. A few seconds she wanted to cry because she had given up meeting a man like him, but the lust took over when his lips moved down her neck and chest. His lips were so soft and full, nothing like any man she had been with before. She breathed heavily and dragged her hands over his chest and upper arms, wanting to feel skin but couldn't find it. Bill understood what she searched for and pulled off his t-shirt fast so his hair got messed up. It didn't matter though because Sienna dragged her hands through it while they kissed, then daring to touch his broad chest and abs. She moaned by seeing and touching his body finally, but Bill thought it was his kisses. He, in his turn, pulled down her top together with her strapless bra and dragged his hands over her chest. When he realized he couldn't kiss her breast without bending down uncomfortably, he pulled her up over his hips and carried her to the queen-sized bed in the corner. He sucked her nipple until it got stiff and then nibbled it lightly. Sienna didn't know what to do with herself when she looked down at Bill. He was so gorgeous and now made her feel her panties stick to her skin. Maybe it was too early to sleep with him, but she didn't care. It felt right. 

Garment after garment was pulled off until they could finally see every part of their skin. Sienna swallowed hard by seeing his physique. He didn't have anything to be ashamed of; he was broad, slim, and big in the right places. She followed the lines on his hips down to his member with her fingers while he stood on his knees between her legs. She smiled with a blush but became uncomfortable when Bill moved down and started kissing the scar on her lower belly. 

“You're so beautiful,” he said when he noticed her tense up. 

“Not there,” she said with a laugh. She tried to sound like she was joking, but her voice was full of doubt. 

“Everywhere…” he answered and kissed the scar again. Sienna smiled and relaxed under his lips but tensed up later for other reasons, his lips right where she wanted them…  

××× 

They lay together tightly between Sienna’s cherry-red sheets. She didn't want anything else than to lie like that with him but was almost afraid to do so. He had become hard twice now, while they cuddled and gave her a hard pounding instead, so hard she now was sore. She had loved it, but now she wanted to lay just like that, on his chest, dragging her finger tips over his soft skin. 

“I haven't… Been intimate with anyone for several years,” she confessed suddenly, and Bill looked down at her while she looked up. 

“Actually, I haven't been with anyone since I was with my son's father…” 

Bill dragged his fingers through her hair, waiting for her to tell him about it her way.

“I guess you've understood he isn't a part of our life…” 

Bill nodded a little but didn't say anything; letting her continue with her own words. 

“I was 22 when I got pregnant. We had been together for two years, but... I was the other woman. He was married, and I waited for him for two years…” 

She talked with a low gaze but didn't cry, even if Bill wouldn’t have minded if she had needed to. He swallowed hard. Cheating was a big no-no for him, but he could see in this situation that Sienna was young, in love, and naive. She also seemed to understand that it was a bad decision. 

“He said he would leave his wife and be with us, but... It never happened. I waited and waited... Ah shit, stupid, stupid… I really thought he would leave her even if he didn't even contact me anymore. I just… Waited. Then he showed up one day, just like that, divorced and suddenly wanted a new chance. But when he realized his son wasn't ‘normal,' he left again.” Sienna shook her head, like all of it was silly. Bill looked at her carefully and finally spoke up. 

“We all do stupid shit when we're in love... He sounds like a fucking idiot, though... Who wouldn't want to be with you?” 

Sienna looked up at him with a smile, but it fell slowly. 

“Sometimes I can't sleep because I just think about his wife, or his ex-wife, I mean. It feels like I should say I'm sorry, but I also can imagine that she doesn't want to meet me, not think about me. I don't know if she knows about me or that her husband has a son behind her back. I don't really know anything. Just his side of it.” 

“No… I don't think either is a good idea to say you're sorry; what's done is done, and she has moved on and so have you. Don't beat up on yourself because of that. It wasn't you who broke her heart; it was him.” 

Sienna nodded a little and moved up so she could kiss Bill's lips, then she laid down next to him.

“The weird feeling is that I can't regret it because I got a son from it, you know? My worst decision ever gave me the person I love the most in the entire world.”

Bill smiled a little, then he looked up at the ceiling, he was thinking about something, and Sienna stayed quiet so he could catch his thoughts. 

“I felt the same. I was only 22 when Kate got pregnant. She was a student in Toronto, where I was filming, and we… Hooked up a few times. I really liked her, but I couldn't see it as something serious. I lived in a suitcase and dreamed about having a big acting career, and then... ‘Im pregnant.’ I wasn't prepared at all. I had just started my career and wanted to party, travel, take drugs…” He laughed to himself and rubbed his eye. “I just thought ‘abortion’. ‘Abortion, abortion, abortion' but she didn't want to do that. She said she would do everything by herself, but that didn't feel good at all, so... I moved to Toronto full time. We weren't a couple or anything at first, but we fell in love during the process, and, yeah, we became a real family.” Sienna looked at Bill with big eyes. She felt honored that he told her about it, something he hadn't talked about in interviews or shared in any other way. 

“When did you get married?” 

“2014. Like a year after our oldest was born. Her family was much more conservative than mine, so... Not that I didn't want to get married to her. I loved her so much, but I didn't really understand why it was so important. I kind of understood it when she left us, though... Me and the girls inherited everything, and all the costs and so on fell on me. It was easy and gave us time to grieve instead…” 

Sienna looked at him with big eyes, and he could see that she had questions. 

“It's okay that you ask things; I just don't like talking with strangers about it all.” 

"Ehm,” she looked down because she felt a bit awkward asking anyway, but after a while she took the courage to do it. 

“Your youngest is born in 2019, the year Kate also died... Was she pregnant while she was sick?” 

Bill nodded; he sat up against the wall, and Sienna did the same with her eyes on his profile. 

“Yeah, they found the tumors while she was pregnant, and she refused to end the pregnancy and get chemo. They said she could probably wait until after the birth with it, but it grew faster than they thought and-” He took a deep breath, and Sienna crawled closer to him and took his hand in hers. Bill's eyes were shiny, but he closed them instead of letting the tears fall. “She died two months after the birth.” Sienna hugged his side, and Bill finally let the tears run down his cheeks. When he had taken some deep breaths, Sienna dared to ask her next question. 

“What kind of cancer was it?” 

“Ehm, brain cancer. It had already spread when they found it.” 

Sienna nodded and dragged her hand over his chest. Both of them carried a painful story, but his was heavier, and she could understand why he had been single for such a long time. 

“But why did you become a writer and not an actor?” She asked after a while of just breathing together. The question lightened the mood, and Bill smirked a little. 

“I guess it's just a coincidence? My plan was to be an actor. I have acted since I was a kid, and my family are actors, but during the pregnancy I started to write, and Kate pushed me to send it to a publisher and... One thing led to another. I don't think I would be a writer if I hadn't met Kate. I would probably continue to act if I got roles,” he said with a smirk. Sienna looked at him amused. 

“I watched everything I could find with you. It was just a couple, but—” 

“No? What? No?” He interrupted her and laughed uncomfortably. “Shit that series was... Fuck, it was so fucking silly in the end!” He laughed and dragged his hands through his hair. Sienna laughed at his uncomfortable behavior and shrugged her shoulders. 

“You were cute, though. I did like Simple Simon a lot.” 

Bill looked at her with a warm smile and nodded a little. He could understand why, and in that moment he was also thankful he had done that role; his understanding of autism was thanks to that role. Simon would always be with him, and he hoped he could get his help when he met Sienna's son. 

For a few seconds, they just looked at each other with understanding smiles. It felt like they had a bond they didn't have before, a respect for each other that didn't come so easily. Both of them then made the move to kiss deeply, softly, and lovingly all at the same time. Their feelings were like fire crackers in their chests. 

××× 

The weekend was full of romance and silly newly in love activities, but still no one of them dared to say what they were actually feeling. It was too soon, and even when they stood at the airport close together, neither of them said anything, even if both of them could feel the words tickle their throats. Instead, they kissed some more and hugged goodbye as close as they could. Sienna did have worry weighing on her chest, something Bill didn't have, but he wasn't the one knowing she would go home to seven other men. He would go home to seven women who all wanted to crawl down in his bed. Sienna felt she could trust Bill to not play with her heart, but she was worried he would fall for one of the others instead, like Esmeralda. No one had missed that they had chemistry, but she also forced down those feelings while saying goodbye; she didn't want their last time together to be spent talking about other women. Slowly they let go of each other, and then Bill left her standing by herself in the big hall. He turned to look at her and thought to himself that as soon as he could, he would make his home to hers.

××× 

Even if Bill was bigger, taller, and stronger than all the people by his dinner table, he felt small when all four of them looked at him with disappointed looks. Herman was one of them, the female producer another; the other two were represented by the network channel that would air the program.

“This is not good, Bill. We can't save this. If Sandra tells the other women, all of them will leave, and we don't have a show,” said the female producer, Precious Daniels. Bill blinked slowly, even if he felt panic in his chest. He wondered if they could sue him for this or something and he would see his daughters secured future, his home, car, but also his reputation disappear. 

“What, what do you want to do then?” He stuttered and looked between the four people. 

“We must talk with Sandra. Write a contract with her, pay her off...” continued Precious and gave Bill a strict glare so he would feel ashamed. In that moment he did because he might have handled this unprofessionally. But his emotions had taken over, and when a memory of Sienna laughing so hard she had spit wine on him came to mind, the shame disappeared, and instead he smirked a bit to himself. 

“Bill?” Sighed Herman, he had probably understood Bill had disappeared into much more pleasant thoughts, and Bill looked up at his friend and rubbed his eyes. 

“We must come up with a long-term solution to this, and the network has agreed to just do ten episodes instead of twelve, but for this to work, you must cooperate, not just... disappear to New Jersey,” continued Herman with a serious expression. Even if he sounded hard, he had Bill's interest in mind. He really tried to make everything as easy for Bill as possible, but it was hard when so much money was on the line. Bill nodded and gazed down at the table. 

“So do you have any ideas?”

Now one of the network representatives cleared her throat and fixed her short hair while looking at Bill's full lips. 

“Well, we must have three more ceremonies with the women, then we need an episode, a staged one, when you search for Sienna, and then we have the reunion that will be its own episode.” 

Bill looked nervous. He knew what that meant. A reunion episode meant drama. Herman had in the beginning promised to make such a thing short and easy, but now it would be a full episode. A full episode for the women to be angry, but he didn't have a choice. 

“Okay, okay,” he said with a sigh and nodded to himself. He just wanted it all to end. 

×

[elithemiar-blog]

FF.NET ACCOUNT CLOSE OUT! (SHUGO CHARA & XOVERS)

Shugo Chara:

My Secret Unlocked! (MSU!)- Amu’s secret comes crashing back as another company (Mathia) wants the Embryo. She began hiding her past that she is secretly a world renowned violist, Musical Kisses, since the age of seven. Mathia’s workers start to research the celebrity’s past; through comparing pictures of the city’s children to Musical Kisses’s photos they discover her identity: Hinamori Amu. Finding her address, the director himself makes a trip to her home and makes a deal with her parents they can’t refuse. Reluctantly, they agree and Amu is forced to work for Mathia to search for the Embryo.

w/Danny Phantom:

The Phantom Guardian- Easter’s director has connections with Vlad; because of this Hoshina wants a new singer through Vlad. Being the fruit loop he is; Vlad decides that Ember would make the deal. For a few days her signature songs are just rumors. Team Phantom notices that Ember hasn’t attacked at all for a whole week, not even an appearance. Even worse is that the news stated that the mayor (A/N: Vlad at the time) has taken a vacation and won’t state where. Jazz and Sam take this as something bad; Danny and Tucker take it as a vacation time. It’s been a few weeks with no ghost attacks and Team Phantom are getting paranoid. With the Shugo Chara gang the new ‘singer’ makes appearances but is unable to stop her because their attacks go right through her. She keeps attacking the Guardians to keep Amu from purifying the eggs.

w/Miraculous Ladybug:

1) Older shugo guardians (sry, it's been too long), have heard about Paris's situation with the Akuma's, believing that it's a possible situation with x-eggs and another embryo situation, they somehow all reunite in Paris to try and find a way to help Ladybug and Chat Noir. Amu and Ikuto reunion?

2) Bunnix appears before Ladybug and Char Noir with a mission to help a situation in Japan. In a different timeline, Hawkmoth had visited Japan for a short time and akumatized the wrong person (Utau), and they must help with purification. As the Guardians there don't understand akumas. (A thought of what would happen if an x-chara transformation got akumatized?)

3) Adrien's fame reaches to Japan and grabs the attention of Easter, Gabriel makes a deal with them, promote each other's business. Gabriel can sense the darkness that resides within Easter and is curious on how he can use it. Plagg and Yoru would absolutely end up meeting at some point, more or less outing each of their owners, then keeping quiet about it. (In my mind, Marinette isn't so secretive and more trusting of Guardian duties to Chat Noir. The only thing they don't know are each other's identities.)

(Due to the closing of my FF.net account, these prompts "Up For Adoption" will be lost to the void forever.)

[summer-sapphic]

Hi I'm mad

[turtlemagnum]

thinking about how the people around me, particularly people i dont know anymore, impacted my fantasy setting. the raccoon people i added because of a friend who wanted to be a raccoon. goblins existing in the way that they do because of someone i still know who really likes a specific kind of goblin, and made me like them too. even minor things, like deciding that a character's eyes were gray because the person i was talking to also had gray eyes. there"s definitely a lot of me in there, but there's still little bits and pieces of others in there too

[whysamwhy123]

Ain't done this in a while but it's sorely needed because I have had A Week. So, if anyone has any spare serotonin lying around and would like to share, through the form of asks, it would be greatly appreciated.

[woolydemon]

I am cursed with the burden of liking so many things but not having energy to make art for all the things I like 😭

[eorzeashan]

fail moment when i spent a huge time away from my wip just to realize after endless deliberation that eight and theron still aren't exactly friends it's just a weird coworker/roomie relationship with benefits and now i have to replace every time he mentions it with like, my associate or something

I think they'll become friends eventually. But a lot of elbow grease is needed and they keep messing up

[theultracharmingladynoire]

.

[charmtale]

the benefit of someone treating you like shit is that it can push you to realize what you really want out of life. i think we're here to experience so many people and places and things and more than anything, joy. i don't think we exist here on this giant earth to curl up in one not-too-horrible corner with not-too-horrible people and live our lives exactly how we think they want us to so that we can stay 'secure'. at least i'm not

[singing-swan]

I think I'm going to switch my username back to singing-swan. No particular reason I just miss it lol

[rhysazriel]

Only Angel [Mafia!Azriel]

SUMMARY: Azriel's a dangerous Mafia leader, Y/N is his favourite dancer at his strip club. His usual Friday night dance turns into something a little more. (6.2k)

WARNINGS: mentions of the mafia and illegal activities, kissing, teasing, swearing, smut; dirty talk, sexual intercourse, spanking, fingering, lap dance.

A/N: This is a rewrite of a very old fic from an old fandom I was in. I’ve edited it the best I can to fit around Azriel’s character, so I apologise in advance if anything appears out of place :) 

Azriel owns a lot of businesses. From stores to hotels, to apartments to clubs. To many, he's a man of business, a man of money. To those aware of the world around them, he's a man of the mafia. Powerful and dangerous. Maybe that's what caught her eye all that time ago, the mysterious aura that bubbled around him.

Y/N's been a dancer at his club since it opened three years ago. It started as a joke between her friends. She was fresh in college and desperately needed a part-time job to pay her bills after she was laid off from the bakery she'd been working at. Callie had mentioned a new strip joint opening on the outskirts of Prythian, that it was a more underground, elite sort of club.

Y/N had laughed it off, joking that she'd look into it and then didn't think of it anymore. But after two weeks of job hunting and no luck, she found herself bumping into a group of young women in a restroom at a bar, and somehow snagged herself an interview at said club.

Eria Vanserra, manager of the club, had hired her the second she opened her mouth and her pretty little voice spoke her name. Y/N was attractive, there was absolutely no doubt in that. She had that look of pure innocence in her eyes, but her lips were wicked. 

The girls had trained her up, taught her the basics on the pole. She's grown close to them, thinks of them as her sisters more than colleagues. They're a team, have each other's backs when new customers try to take advantage and hype each other up for when the regular 60-year-olds come in and request private sessions. 

Y/N -- or rather Angel -- only offers private sessions for one customer: The Boss. They met just over a year into her employment, and it was on their first greeting that Azriel took an instant liking to the devilish dancer, and she took the same approach with him. 

Y/N's been teased for it relentlessly; snickers made from a few of the girls that didn't like how much Azriel liked her, but she didn't care then, and she doesn't care now. Not when every other Friday night, he has her booked for an intimate performance in the back room -- the room that's only ever reserved by him. 

It's been a long week. Classes were cancelled due to some ongoing investigation with one of Y/N's professors, and so she's been able to pick up shifts every night at the club. Shadow's is an elite place, and Y/N knows it. It's a home for the best dancers and the richest of men that sneak off to get their fix. 

It's not a brothel -- at least, not primarily. And none of the girls is ever forced into anything they don't want to do. That's one of the first things Eris made very clear. 

You're here to dance. Private sessions are your own choice, and anything that goes on behind closed curtains is your decision. If you want to offer extra services, the club doesn't touch that money.

Y/N's never been one to stray from the pole. She knows her strengths, and she knows her weaknesses. She's strong, it's obvious, but even the strongest of dancers find it unsettling to be behind a closed curtain with a strange man that clearly can't get much outside of what his money can buy.

The thought unsettles her, but she's never let her own discomfort project on the other girls that spend hours in private rooms with a different man every twenty minutes. They're the real talent, she thinks. Inspiring and badass, and Y/N wishes she had that extra ounce of confidence that they do.

Or at least, she used to wish so. Before she met Azriel -- before he started watching her whenever he stopped by. For two years, she's the only dancer his honey eyes have watched, and something about that knowledge gives Y/N all the confidence she thinks she'll ever need.

Because she's the one that gets under the mafia leaders' skin. His eyes are always on Y/N. She's the one that occupies his mind and tightens his pants from her presence on the pole. It wasn't until almost five months ago that Azriel made a move to ask for a private dance. 

He's done it before, many times. He's had his dick sucked more than he can remember behind those red curtains, but never by a woman as captivating and as talented as her -- his Angel. 

Azriel still remembers the first time he laid eyes on her, upon that risen stage with soft lights offering a halo effect on her silhouette. He saw her hips first, her long legs as she wrapped them around the poll and jutted her ass out deliciously. Then he saw her face -- those angelic eyes and sinful lips, and he knew he was fucked.

He remembers pulling Eris to the side, eyes still on her as he asked who the fuck she was, and why someone so beautiful was working for him. Remembers the way Eris told him her stage name, how it had his cock springing to life in appreciation for the way she moved. 

It all seems like a lifetime ago when he thinks back to it. And while there have been plenty of Friday nights that he frequents the club, he's yet to take things outside of the red room. 

And it's not that he doesn't want to, because he does -- more than he wants a lot of things. But Azriel is a man of honour (even in his line of work), and he's never been one to pressure a woman into something he wants. 

But Angel isn't like any woman. Not to him. 

Azriel deems she's by far the most precious thing he's ever laid eyes on, and he has a need to hold and protect her and show her just how a woman like herself deserves to be treated. 

He could give her the world, and they both know it. 

Tonight is like every other late Friday evening. Y/N's dolled up to the nines as she reapplies her lipstick. She's been at the club since seven, and three dances later and a round of waitressing, it's nearing midnight. Y/N's ready to go to bed. 

She's ready to call it a night, to tell Eris she's heading out early after picking up so many shifts in the week. Not only because she's tired, but also, Azriel hasn't shown up yet, and he's never come this late before. 

Just as Y/N is adjusting her bra straps, she sees Mor’s head pop out through the corner of the door through the mirror. The blonde has a wide grin on her face, and she knows exactly what that suggests. 

"He's here."

Y/N rolls her eyes. "He's also late. My shift ends in ten minutes."

Mor pouts out her lips, shaking her head, and her breasts bounce slightly on her covered chest. "But he's asking for you. And stop pretending like it's such a burden. You love when he shows up, and he loves when you dance for him. We all know it. Quit acting like you don't secretly enjoy it." She bites back, stomping her foot to make her point and Y/N spins in her chair to look at her full on.

Mor raises her brows. "All the other girls would kill to dance for him, to have him ask for them. Myself included. Stop acting like a brat and put on a fucking show."

Y/N isn't given a chance to reply because Mor is sauntering out of the dressing room, and she's left alone to swiftly get ready. She pretends to ignore the rampaging butterflies in her stomach at the idea of seeing him again. 

She's never scared, could never be. Y/N knows Azriel would never hurt her. But, she's nervous. Azriel always gives Y/N his undivided attention when she's dancing for him, and it's intimidating and exciting all at once. His eyes are so dark and calculated, and he's always so damn respectful when she sits on his lap­ -- never wanting to make her uncomfortable. 

Sometimes, Y/N just wants him to take charge. Even knowing exactly what he's capable of, she wants him to take her. Ravish her. Have his way with her. She wants him to completely dominate her, and often, Y/N finds herself wondering what would happen if she riled him up enough to get him to that state. 

If she acted like a brat, would he throw her over his lap and spank her?

If she talked back, would he pull her hair or spit in her mouth?

If she asked for him to touch her, would he grip her ass and kiss her neck?

Y/N's mind swirls with the unanswered questions every time she sees him, and it's getting a bit much to keep to herself. She's getting tired of being a little plaything to him –- not that she has the right to be upset, but she is. 

She doesn't like that he only comes to her every Friday night. To the club. Is she not worth more than two hours a week? 

Then spirals the anxiety.

Is he only coming to her because he thinks she's easy? Is he doing it because he knows he'll never have to do anything more than let her dance? Is he doing it out of pity? Because he thinks she's lonely, so it's to make her feel special? 

Is Azriel even attracted to her, or does he just do it for shits and giggles? Does he go back to his brothers and his men and laugh about her? At her? Is it all a bit of fun to him?

Y/N gets too in her head, and then the idea of seeing him again is revolting. She doesn't know him -- she can't say whether her thoughts are crazy or valid. She doesn't know the kind of person he really is -- despite the rumours. 

But though she goes through these motions, Y/N pushes them to the back of her head and gets on with it. She puts on her smile, and she dances. 

Azriel tends to book her out for an hour at a time, sometimes two hours if he's feeling extra needy or he has the time. And he's generous with his money, too. Typically, he pays double for her time, which is a month's rent for Y/N but pocket change for him.

It makes her feel dirty, but she has to remind herself that actually, this is her job and he does have the money and means to pay for her time.

That's all he's doing -- paying for her time. For her. Like some sort of cheap and easy prostitute that he can go to whenever he needs a fix. And she never touches him (not under his clothes), but it still makes her feel dirty.

Y/N knows what the other girls do in the private rooms; the type of shows that they offer. She doesn't judge them, she could never. They're all in the same or similar boats: broke and trying to make a living, to make ends meet. But none of them dance for the owner. None of them are ever requested by him. 

Y/N takes a deep breath and composes herself. She can't look in the mirror for a moment longer because if she does, she'll start seeing every flaw she has, and she'll never leave the damn dressing room. 

The club is busy, it always is on a Friday night. There's a party in the upper left tier, a few dancers that have been hired for the night and Y/N is more than pleased that she wasn't booked for it. It's a bunch of frat boys celebrating one of their friend's birthdays, and from Y/N's place on the lower deck, she can already recognise a few familiar faces from her classes.

The last thing she needs is for people to know she's an erotic dancer at one of the most elite, secret clubs. 

She doesn't bother questioning how the younger men know about the place. 

Y/N makes her way toward the private booths, and the one to the far right has its curtains closed. She takes a deep breath, knows he's sitting behind it, waiting for her.

She doesn't give herself any time to hype herself up or change her mind, because she's pushing through the red velvet curtain and closing it behind her. 

The booths are all the same. Dim lighting and velvet cushioned seats. The walls are deep, silky pink, the furniture all an intoxicating shade of red, and in the centre of the rounded chair, Azriel sits. 

His legs are spread wide, dressed to the nines in a slick black suit, and his bulging arms are outstretched across the back of the chair. 

He's shed his blazer, has it hanging on the side, his shirt sleeves folded up to his elbows, swirls of black ink coating his dark complexion. Everything about his attire screams power and sex, and Y/N hasn't even looked at his face yet. 

"There’s my pretty girl."

Her eyes dart up, his lips are parted. There's a knowing smirk on his pink mouth, and Azriel's eyes are a glimmering caramel under the dim light. Y/N thinks he's never looked more handsome, but that's always her thought whenever she sees him.

She can't help the contagiously shy smile that tugs on the corners of her plump lips. 

"Little late tonight," she mentions quietly. 

He doesn't say anything, and his eyes are too busy taking in her appearance. He hasn't seen this outfit before; a lilac cami bodysuit, entirely of lace. The chest of it is plunged yet lifted, and her supple breasts look the most inviting they've ever been.

Azriel struggles to wrap his head around the sight of her -- he always does. Always thinks she looks even prettier every time he sees her.

Azriel finally shrugs his shoulders. "I'm a busy man, Angel. Thought you knew that by now." He doesn't take his eyes off her, he can't.

Completely fucking mesmerised.

Y/N shrugs. "Must've been extra busy to be this late." She tells him.

Y/N is making her way closer, her hips swaying with every small step and Azriel's sure he can feel his cock twitch in his pants from anticipation.

"I was starting to think you weren't going to come."

He raises a brow as she settles herself in his lap, his scarred hands–that she’s never shown any distaste to–slowly yet respectfully finding her waist.

"Oh, I always come, baby."

She knows there's a double meaning to his statement — can tell by the smirk on his lips and the tone of his voice. Always a smooth talker.

Y/N decides that if he can play, so can she. 

"I wouldn't know."

Azriel's the one to stop her hips from moving on top of his, and he chases her gaze to lock eyes. She's deadpanning -- void of emotion on her pretty little face and Azriel thinks this newfound side of her is the sexiest thing he's witnessed in a long time.

He cocks a brow. "Playing like that tonight, are we?" He asks, his thumbs pressing into the fleshy skin of her side.

Y/N shrugs her shoulders, plays coy. "I don't know. Are we?"

She twists the question, unsure where this surge of confidence is coming from, but she isn't about to back down from it, from him.

She wants more than just a lap dance. She thinks Azriel does too.

Azriel stays quiet for a moment or two like he's toying with the idea of having his way with her -- of letting her have him.

He squints and tries to look for an ounce of uncertainty or hesitancy. He comes empty, finding nothing short of confidence and desire. But has she thought it all through?

Has she thought about what this could mean? Has she accepted the fact that they may never see each other again -- something so silly because Azriel quite likes the girl, but if he kisses her, touches her -- what if it inherently puts her in danger?

She senses his dismay and offers an ultimatum; one that she knows she'll win. 

"Because either we are, or you need to find a new dancer."  

The threat awakens something in him. Something primal — animalistic. His eyes flash, darker and darker until his swelling pupils almost completely drown out the honey in his eyes.

His grip on her hips tighten, and Azriel forces her closer; lace-clad chest bumping against his clothed one. "I don't want a new dancer." He tells her. His voice is firm, tone even and stable. He knows what he wants, and now, she knows it's her.

Y/N lets her fingers reach for the longer curls on the nape of his neck. She intertwines her fingers around them, generously tugging, so his head pulls back just enough for her to use her other hand to grip his chin. Azriel's lips are parted, eyes hooded. He can feel her breath fan across his face as she brings hers closer.

"But that's all I am to you, right? Just a dancer?"

He isn't sure what she's doing -- whether she's fishing for something more or if she's about to walk out of the booth and leave him panting and painfully hard.

He plays into it, though. Let's see where this is going.

"More than just a dancer, baby." He promises.

Y/N ghosts her plump lips over his. "Yeah?" She breathes, her voice an airy whisper and Azriels got the perfect fucking sight of her cleavage. Reckons he wants nothing more than to bury his face between her pert tits.

He nods. "Mhm, you're my Angel." He tells her.

Azriel's hands reach around for her ass, grabbing handfuls and pulling her cheeks taut. He removes his hand and strikes it back down on her warm, fleshy skin. Y/N jolts into his body, teeth gnawing painfully on her lower lip to bite back her desperate pleads and whines.

Azriel gropes her again, massaging her cheeks and grabbing fistfuls. "My Angel."

His. She's all fucking his.

Her breathing is laboured as she takes in his words. Y/N tries not to let him see how riled up they make her, but she knows Azriel can see straight through any facade she tries to hide behind.

"Well, if I'm an angel, that must make you the devil."

Y/N's words echo through his mind, and his grip on her waist tightens in a squeeze before it loosens. His eyes find her chest, lip taut between his teeth.

"Maybe I am. Tell me, Angel… are you really ready to be corrupted?"

His eyes find hers, low and hooded and full of so much excitement and darkness, he gets lost in the way she pulls him in. Y/N's hands find his on her waist, her fingers gripping over his and his hold tightens again.

She rolls her hips against his crotch. "Maybe that's exactly what I want," she whispers, her lips trailing over the shell of his ear and her warm breath fans across his neck. "Maybe I'm already a little wicked."

She pulls away, nose brushing past his but he doesn't let her put any more distance between them. He wants her close, likes the feel of her warm breath on his face, likes the sweet scent of vanilla and coconut that's splattered on her skin and lingers in his mind.

Her lips are parted, as is Azriel's, and he can see the little peek of her glistening tongue, teetering between her teeth. His own does the same, subconsciously matching her teasing and his length throbs beneath her; something they both feel but neither say.

"If we do this, there's no going back. You're not just a fuck to me."

Y/N's heart skips, her heat quivering and chills run down her spine. So she is more to him... but what will this mean after?

"If I'm not just a fuck, then what am I?" She pries.

Azriel nudges the tip of his nose with hers. A smirk ghosts on the corners of her lips as they brush against hers. "My Angel," he whispers. "My only Angel."

Y/N envelopes Azriel's lips in hers, fingers reaching for the back of his head and they tug at the curls on the nape of his neck. It's hot, fiery. She can feel her soul ignite in bursts of white flames, and Azriel's no better at controlling himself.

His mind is foggy, judgement clouded, but he knows he never wants to live a day without feeling her pillowy lips on his. So he kisses her harder, grips her hips with such force they both know she'll bruise by morning. But she loves it, loves the idea of having him mark her and the animalistic part of Azriel craves it too.

"I'm not gonna go easy on you." He warns her breathlessly through the smacking of lips, but Y/N rolls more rigid atop him; pulls his hair that little bit eager.

"Good," she pants, pulling away. "I want it hard."

Y/N stands between his thick, parted thighs. She lets her mouth water as her gaze takes him in. Azriel's no better. His cock is leaping eagerly in his pants at the sight of her. Perfect body in a perfect set, lips swollen and eyes wholly fucked. Her hair is a mess, lipstick smudged and fuck, does he want to shove her face into his silk pillows and ram her little pussy from behind until she can't breathe.

"You're gonna kill me, Angel." He chokes out through his lust-filled daydream, chest heaving in anticipation.

Then she starts to sink to her knees and rubs her palms up his inner thighs, and Azriel about loses it. He shakes his head, breathing hard through gritted teeth and his hands find her wrists, halting her movements.

He shakes his head as he pulls Y/N to her feet, dragging closer until she's straddling him again. Azriel's hands cup her jaw, fingers tangled in her hair. "Gonna take my time with you, have you squirming beneath me until you beg me to stop." His promise has her drooping eyes flutter close, and her lips parting. Thinks she's the sexiest thing he's ever laid eyes on.

His nose bumps hers, lips touching but they don't kiss. "But right now, I need you to be a good girl and turn around." 

Azriel's voice is stern, commanding. It makes her pussy throb and clench and gush, and he knows it. She nods and moves on trembling legs, turning so her back is to him, and Azriel's hands find their home on the swell of her ass.

There's something about him being so strong and dominant to her that has Y/N a puddle of arousal and submission.

She bites back a squeak as he smacks a palm down on her cheek, her eyes squinted closed while Azriel licks his lips at the way her flesh moves with the force of his strike. "Perfect fucking ass."

Y/N gnaws on her bottom lip, teeth piercing the skin but the slight sting of pain only spurs her on -- makes her even more eager for him. She sways her hips, ass a perfect peach shape as she does so and Azriel grips her hips and forces her on his crotch.

Her arousal is sticky against the lace of her panties as she can feel the thick outline of Azriel's cock when she gets seated over his clothed centre.

"Holy shit," she gulps.

Y/N has heard the rumours, the ones that are whispered in the shadows of the night -- of the one that's half man, half something else.

Now she can feel him directly beneath her, and Y/N's mind is heavy and clouded. "Feel how hard you make me?"

His lips are ghosting across her ear; teeth nibbling hauntingly on the shell of it which sends shivers down her spine.

Y/N nods, breathless and wanton. She can't make sense of anything, but she knows she wants this -- needs this.

"Use your words."

She swallows, shaky whimper teetering on the tip of her tongue. "Yes, I can feel you."

Azriel's sick behind her; full of himself as she strokes his ever-growing ego. There's something about hearing her so vocally express how much she wants him, how much she can feel him that has Azriel seeing stars. He isn't blind, he can see just how desperate and hungry the woman is, but a little verbal confirmation never hurt anyone.

His hands rest upon the globes of her ass again, swatting and smoothing however he pleases. The hits have her jolting and shrieking — they have tears stinging at her eyes but fuck, she wants more. She needs it harder.

"Please," she coos softly.

Her voice is cracking and unsteady like she's walking on eggshells.

"Please." Azriel mimics, voice high and childish, one that has her squirming in his lap.

He spanks her again. "Please, what?"

There's a pause of silence as Y/N attempts to catch her breath. She knows what this man can do to her, how he can make her feel. She knows he'll be far from vanilla, and maybe that's exactly what she wants and needs.

"Please, sir." She breathes. "Fuck me."

Smack!

A shrill shriek tears through her chest, and Azriel strikes his palm back down on her skin. His other busies with his belt, tugging it open and popping the button of his pants. He drags down the zip, a sound that echoes through her ears and sends shivers down her spine.

Y/N looks back over her shoulder, her hands steadying herself on Azriel's parted knees when she sees him. Thick, long... oozing with his sweet arousal that she wants to suckle up and swallow down her throat.

His cock stands tall, smacking against his lower stomach and he's big -- better than anything Y/N's ever had before. Her mouth waters at the sight. She can feel her cunt pulsing when his scarred hand wraps around his length and tugs deliciously at himself.

She whines, eager and needy. Azriel's eyes are on her ass, hasn't even realised that she's looking back at him.

He toys with the lace of her panties that disappears between her cheeks. Looping his pointer finger under the fabric at the top of her ass, he lifts it and bunches the lace in a fist, effectively tugging friction across her cunt as he gets a better view of her ass.

She's glistening, he can see. Y/N's pussy is swollen, and the sides of her lips threaten to spill out of the fabric that barely covers her.

"I'll fuck you, baby." He tells her.

Azriel tugs the lace to the side, her pussy soaked and perfect. He swipes a thumb through her wetness, swirling around her tight hole and bringing his thumb to his mouth as he suckles her arousal.

Sweet. So fucking sweet.

He grasps his cock in his hand again, pumping a few ample times before holding himself at the base and lining up with her sopping cunt. Azriel teases her for a moment, smacking the ruddy head of his prick against her pussy and she whines, rolls closer to him.

With a sick grin, Azriel massages his tip against her hole, jutting softly as he pushes in just enough to get comfortable. A low whine echoes through the room, but neither of them knows who it belongs to.

His hands find her hips, squeezing at her flesh. "But you won't be dancing on that pole for a few days."

Lifting his hips and pulling her down by hers, Azriel sheathes into her at once. Her frantic gasp tears through her lips, and her eyes are wide and watering with complete bliss and pain.

Azriel's gritting his teeth, sharp breath spitting through between them. He can't believe how fucking tight she is, and Y/N is fairly confident she can feel him so deep in her fucking stomach.

"Such a tight fucking cunt, Angel." Azriel's mind is in turmoil, can't quite fucking believe a cunt can feel this good.

Y/N is no better; she's a quivering mess on top of him, her grip on his clothed knees surely carving half-moons upon his skin but if it's causing Azriel any pain or discomfort, he seems to love it.

"So big, feel so full," she whines out.

Her ass is nestled in his lap, the coarse hairs of his pubic bone tickling at her supple skin and Y/N rolls her hips experimentally against his. He's still gripping her hips as she moves, her cunt clenching deliciously around his length and he's positively amazed by just how fucking tight she is.

"Yeah? Feel me in your tummy, Angel?" 

She's nodding, whining filthily, and she can't comprehend how sex can feel this good. One hand of Azriel's snakes around her body, tips of his fore and middle finger massaging tight circles on her clit.

Y/N's cunt is on fire, swelling and pulsing and fucking gushing all over the thickness of Azriel's entire dick. He's a mess below her, though. He can't believe how well she's taking the entirety of him.

She's snug, tight — warm and fucking soaked. The feeling of her swallowing him up is completely euphoric; has Azriel's eyes rolling to the back of his head.

His rhythm on her clit is furious; strong, tight circles that have filthy cries and moans slipping past her flawlessly painted lips. Y/N's still gripping his knees, hips rolling and pussy squelching.

"Yeah, right in my tummy. God, it's so good. Don't stop, Azzy... please don't stop."

Y/N is a blubbering mess, eyes squeezed shut and jaw slack. She bounces quickly on top of him, feeling every vein and ridge of his thick cock as it pounds into her and tears her apart. Her walls are slick around him, desperate to milk him dry and take his sticky cum.

Azriel lets his eyes focus on her ass, the way it's spread just a little and how the imprint of his ringed hands are starting to bloom on her supple cheeks. Azriel's eyes divert lower when he sees it, sees her take him.

Her lips are swollen, clinging to his length as she comes off him. The base of his cock is soaked, the start of a creamy ring forming around him and Azriel can't get enough. He relents his assault on her clit, makes for her ass instead and pulls her cheeks as far apart as he can. 

His hands massage her skin, saliva welling on his tongue and parting his gritted teeth for a split second, he spits down on her puckering hole and rubs the lubricant across her ass.

Y/N keens at the touch -- the welcomed intrusion -- and bounces faster. Azriel's thumbing at her hole, teasingly rubbing the tip of his thumb around her but it has her a quivering and desperate mess.

"Please, please." She pants out, head falling back and eyes tightly shut.

Azriel gnaws on his lower lip, biting back a smirk, but his hooded eyes are a dead giveaway he's having the time of his life. "Yeah?" He rasps. "Want me in both your holes, Princess?" He baits. He knows it's exactly what she wants.

Y/N nods quickly, crying and pleading for something. He knows precisely the effect he's got on her right now, the power Azriel holds over her, (not that he sees it that way, but knowing she's in such a besotted state from him playing with her ass a little, is feeding Azriel's ego tremendously.)

"Now that's not very Angel-like of you, is it? Angel?"

A shriek leaves her lips as the tip of his finger pushes through, immediately enveloped in warmth and softness. She's blubbering, can't make sense of fucking anything and it feels so damn good.

Azriel never anticipated such a reaction from her, but he's got it, and he fucking loves it.

"Who would've thought," he pants, feet firm on the ground as he fucks up into her cunt, completely obliterating her soul, "that my Angel likes having her sweet little ass stuffed?"

A borderline pornographic cry teeters past her silky tongue, and Azriel's mind is keening. She's still as she hovers over his crotch, letting him fuck her however he damn well pleases. His pace is fast, cock brushing every overwhelming part it reaches as he pushes his thumb deeper into her ass.

"Your Angel," she whimpers out, eyes watering and thighs spasming. "I'm yours, all yours. Only want you stuffing me this good."

Her words are drawled in a matted string of barely comprehendible syllables, but Azriel can understand what she's saying.

"Yeah? Fuck, you’re gonna make me cum, sweetheart."

"Cum! Please, cum in me, wanna feel it."

Azriel curses silently behind her, can't believe how fucking perfect this woman is. His balls feel tight, can feel her squeezing him harder and he knows she's about to come too.

"Yeah? It's gonna be a lot baby," he warns. "Think you can handle it? Think you can take my cum, Angel?"

Y/N nods quickly, vigorously. "I can take it! Please, I promise."

She's despondent, like a child. The need in her voice spurs Azriel to his edge, and as his cock bloats and shoots his arousal across her walls, she reaches her own high of euphoria.

They're both panting, grunting and moaning and whining. Y/N's gushing around his cock, creating a decent spillage on the base of him but even as he softens, he's still quite hard.

Azriel doesn't move, no. He makes no endeavour of pushing her off him. Instead, Azriel slowly pulls his fingers from her ass and cooing at the winces and whimpers that resound through the private booth. He shelters his arms around her waist to pull her back flush to his chest.

They both whimper, bodies spent, and eyes hooded. The back of Y/N's head is lounging on his shoulder when Azriel finally gets a glimpse at her face.

Totally fucked.

A wheezing laugh rumbles deep in her chest, and he reaches for her face, cupping the side of her jaw and guiding her lips to meet his in a messy, wet kiss. She pulses around him.

"You're fucking phenomenal."

Another breathy snicker falls past her lips to his. Azriel pinches her hips. "How are you feeling?"

Y/N puffs, eyes fluttering as she slowly raises, bites back the whine she wants to pout at the hollow feeling of him slipping from her cunt.

"The big bad Mob boss wants to know how I'm feeling?" She tantalises.

Azriel watches her make quick work of pulling her panties back over her cunt, halting his cum from leaking out and down her thighs, but he makes no effort to tuck his softening, yet still majestic, length back in his pants.

He lies back with his arms outstretched across the back of the oval couch. "He does," he agrees. "Cares about you, if you didn't already recognise that."

Azriel doesn't miss how she shies away from his gaze, turning her back to him to alter her outfit and to take a moment to compose herself. He takes the opportunity to fix himself too, before he's right behind her, nosing at her hair.

"I meant what I said, Angel," he murmurs. "You're not just a fuck to me."

Y/N turns, chin raised as she eyes him. Her shoulders are strained back, and Azriel knows she's making this posture move to assert confidence, and he doesn't doubt her one bit.

"Then what am I? And don't say your Angel."

"You're a strong, elegant, smart, badass, sexy, intelligent, confident woman," he begins, his hands finding her hips. "And I want you. I want you all to myself."

She peeps, her heart thumping sporadically in her chest. For a moment, it's like the mind-blowing sex from just seconds ago has been utterly omitted.

"You trust me enough for that?" She asks, and Azriel knows precisely what she's asking.

Does he trust her with who he is and what he does? Does he have trust that she will keep her mouth shut and not see him differently when she learns what he's truly capable of? Does he trust that she's all about him?

Azriel quirks a brow. "Do you trust me?"

Does she trust him with her life, because that's what it boils down to? Does she trust him enough to put her life in perpetual danger? Does she trust that he will only desire her, that he will put her before his work? Does she trust that he will never harm her?

Y/N nods. "I trust you."

Azriel drops his head, face closer to hers and the tips of their noses brush.

"Then I advise you to get your things and let me take you back to my place. Because you're in for a long fucking night, Angel."

Thank you for reading!! If you enjoyed it, please consider giving it a reblog and leaving some feedback!! <3

[thinkinonsense]

I KNEW YOU IN ANOTHER LIFEᰔ

dp&w!logan howlett x past wife!reader

cw: mostly angst, some fluff, sorta mean logan, cussing.

wc: 800+

a/n: this is inspired by a one-shot I read a while back but I cannot remember who wrote it. If anyone knows, please please please let me know in the comments so I can give them credit <3 update!!! this is it!!

｡ ₊°༺❤︎༻°₊ ｡

The last person you thought you would find here in the void is Logan. There has never been a Wolverine in here. You almost didn't believe it when you found out; needing to see him for yourself. And here he was. Right in front of you, the Logan you grieved all those years ago. The one who stole your heart.

Your Logan.

"And who the fuck are you?" He barked, pushing you away from him.

Those words broke your heart the second they left his lips.

Wade smacks Logan, informing him of your past together. Logan looked like he didn't believe Wade at first. You were way too beautiful for any version of him, Logan thought. What would someone like you want with a man like him?

Tears well up in your eyes as you leave, not wanting it to sting anymore. Laura follows you, glaring at the man who looked like her father. Logan didn't seem to care about the new information, instead reaching for another one of Gambit's bottles.

"I'm sorry, mom," Laura whispers, wrapping her arms around you.

"It's okay, sweetie. I'm not sure what I expected to happen." You sniffle. "He just looks so much like him."

"I know."

Suddenly, Laura stood up and stomped out the door to confront the man who upset her mother. She found Logan sitting outside alone by the fire.

"Look kid, I'm not the man you and your mother think I am." Logan sighs, not even bothering to turn around to check if it's Laura.

"You made her cry," Laura hissed, ignoring his previous comment. Logan looked up at the young girl almost apologetically before shaking his head. "Her Logan would have never made her cry."

Logan felt a sharpness in his stomach at the news. Deep down, he wondered if you two were together at some point. He doubted it though because you looked out of his league. If a past version of him managed to marry you then maybe he did some good during his time.

"If you two haven't noticed, I'm the worst Logan apparently."

"You don't have to be."

ᰔ

It's late when you finally stumble out of bed, not able to sleep. Hours of tossing and turning, trying to get Logan out of your mind. This felt like a cruel joke on your poor heart. You know it's unfair to have him pretend to be your Logan but you desperately wanted it to be him.

All of your memories together haunt your mind like a graveyard. Sweet Sundays spent wrapped in sheets. How he kissed your face every morning, had you wear his dog tags, and ride on the back of his motorcycle. You would give anything to get just one of those moments back.

"What are you doin' awake?"

The voice behind you caused you to jump slightly. A hand coming to rest on your back. You turn around, face-to-face with Logan.

"Can't sleep." You shrugged, opening the freezer to pull out a container of strawberry ice cream.

"That shit won't help you sleep." He grunts, sitting at the table. You ignore his grumpiness and continue scooping the ice cream into a bowl.

"Can we talk?" Logan didn't look you in the eyes as he spoke. Too ashamed of his actions earlier.

"I suppose so." You shrugged, pulling the spoon from between your lips.

"Were we really married?"

You answer by pulling the chain around your neck for him to see. A small diamond ring dangled next to the dog tags he gave you. The moment he saw it, he felt like the biggest asshole who ever lived.

"How many years?" The words stung in his throat.

"Five."

"What was our life like?"

"Perfect." You smile softly down at your bowl. "At least it was to me."

"You did a good job with raising her." He muttered, referring to Laura.

"You would have to."

He's silent for a second, trying to wrap his mind around the idea of being a husband and a father. He wished he knew what it was like to be cared for as much as you cared for your Logan.

"You know, you have the same look in your eyes," Your voice was so quiet, stepping closer to him until you were in front of him.

Logan could see the desperation on your face as you stared at his lips. It would be wrong for him to toy with your widowed heart, but he wanted to be the man you needed. The man you deserved.

"I'm not him, sweetheart," He said, attempting to stop you before you hurt yourself. "And I don't want you to get hurt-"

"Please," You beg, eyes filling up with tears. "I don't care who you are. I just don't want it to hurt anymore."

You were slowly killing him. How could he say no to you? Even if he was the worst Logan, he has a heart. Which is why he lets you close the gap between the two of you. His hands are tangled in your hair while one of yours rests on his jaw before climbing into his lap.

For the first time in years, your heart began beating again. You and Logan could play pretend for now. Neither of you cared what would happen tomorrow, right now was all that mattered.