#i don’t really interact with warriors tumblr on account of not really being in fandom since i was 15
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when one of your like. LEAST favorite warrior cats characters when you were in middle school over a decade ago has turned into one of tumblr’s very favorites my inner child me is screaming crying throwing up 😔
#i don’t really interact with warriors tumblr on account of not really being in fandom since i was 15#but still feels sad to be on the unpopular side of fandom nowadays especially when so many ppl agreed with me 10 years ago#ppl can like who they want do whatever they want forever#but they won’t change my mind i thought she was annoying and wrote a bashfic where my oc killed her and 15 year old me is valid forever uwu#(none of this is serious musings please ppl don’t think i’m like actually upset or anything)#owl blabs
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Dividers
Ello! I’m Charlie (#1 Chief fan and #2 Ann fan) buuut you can also call me Orion or Rory! :D
more info about me: https://en.pronouns.page/@CH4R71Z4VRVZ
🇷🇺🇺🇸 (born and raised to drink vodka and dance with bears 💪💪)
Cracklin, Chief, Mr. R, Sketchpad, Airy, Gerbo, Thomas Flyswatter, Exclamation Mark, Doorstopper, Clock, Fridge DJ, WWF Tile, Printer, Season17, Lightbulb, Taco, Bot, Cabby, Fan, Yoshka, Yulka, Zara, Cheppy, Socka, Charmy, Edgar, Fossil, Mushroom, Wagyu, Minty, Razor, and Orange Herald are all of my favorite characters/kins :3 (OUTDATED)
I am Homoflexible, Transgender, Agender, and Greysexual ^u^
Alterhuman therian and fictionkin, my theriotypes are black wolf, snow husky, and a T-Rex <33
I’m an artist and a little bit of a violinist (I mainly speak English but I also speak Russian!)
I am a MINOR!!! I am ok if adults (NOT THE FUCKING SEX BOTS) interact with my blog or me in general just don’t be creepy or kinky about it please.. (read dni list for specifics)
My blog is not meant for younger audiences, therefore I am telling you all that this is a 13+ BLOG. mainly because I’ll post art with mildly suggestive themes in it or reblog something weird.. whatever it may be, I just want to protect the little itty bitty babies that happen to stumble upon this beautiful yet horrifying tumblr blog .-.
currently locked in @thesillygoober7’s basement
old acc is @charlibugg T_T
Here’s most of the stuff I like ! Purple = ION💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚
Blue = VERY VEEERY VERY VERY VERY VERY VEEERRYRYYY HYPERFIXATED
Green = LOVE ITTT
Orange = Cool cool I like it
Red = Eh… I mean it’s fine.. II/III, I.O.N/И.О.Н, TNM, TPOT, EEE/THREEEE, BURNER, 5SOS, ONE, CFMOT/ИНМТ, Objectified, TDOS, LoTS, Animatic Battle, Bugbo, Dreamophrenia, Sprunki, Max Design Pro, Warrior Cats, Smiling Friends, ATHF, Gravity Falls, Villainous, Countryhumans, DHMIS, Electric Dreams (1984), Ride the Cyclone, JSAB/Pink Corruption, Regretevator, Mouthwashing, Homestuck
besides fandoms I hyperfixate on time to time… I also LOVE nuclear reactors, dinosaurs, cats, epic guitar solos in music, whatever the hell plutonium jazz is, and I just genuinely love learning ANYTHING about nuclear physics and energy :3 (oh and lollipops, I love lollipops)
Some games I really like (not Roblox games) are In Stars and Time, Fallout 4/Fallout: New Vegas (IM SORRY FALLOUT 76 IS SO BORING AND BUGGY AAAAA), Omori, Sims 2-4, Tomodachi Life, Miitopia, Cardpocalypse, Wobbledogs, Pikuniku, Ooblets, Splatoon 2-3, Dragon Quest: Builders 1-2, Minecraft, Wandersong, JSAB, and AC:NH :3
and most of the bands/artists I listen to (current hyperfix band will be written in bold) are MSI, sElf, WW/WWATT, The Scary Jokes, Sodikken, MOTHH, Lemon Demon, Tally Hall, Bondage Fairies, And One, STOMACH BOOK, Ken Ashcorp, KSB Muzic, LiteralHat, YFM, Limp Bizkit, Insane Clown Posse, Gorillaz, System Of A Down, Foo Fighters, Dream Puzzles, That Handsome Devil, Sacri, They Might Be Giants, Oingo Boingo, Weird Al, Jhariah, Lenin Was A Zombie, and Drive45!
I have Autism, ADHD, (I have some sort of Anxiety disorder too, forgot what it was called though) and Depression.. so sorry if I don’t talk/respond to asks or dms quick enough or I don’t answer them properly… I’m a very shy person. So please text me first if you want to dm me, if you’re a mutual I’d love to talk to you! ^_^
ask box will close down sometimes, it is not a mistake usually, I just don’t feel like taking asks (or I’m being swarmed by donation asks and I feel overwhelmed) :3
DNI - uhhhh this (carrd not mine) ..also I will check your account once you follow me usually to see if you aren’t a weirdo, I block who I choose to block
Places I inhabit:
YouTube: Charlizardsb - CharlieSB
Spotify: Lenin’s bf
Pinterest: LIZARDWAZAZOMBIE - charred corpse
Instagram: Charlizardsb
Wattpad: spagheetee
Discord: (please DM me if you want my username)
TikTok: lizzardz.0n.steroidz
(Created: 1/15/24)
(Last updated: 10/13/24)
I reblog WAYY too much posts so if you’re willing to find my art search #bugs goof art
#Charlizard’s rabble ransoms - for random posts that are just filler or me going on a whole rant (will also be tagged for long posts too sometimes)
#enjoy your stay#you’ll have to wait a long while until I actually post cool art or something if you wanna find me anywhere#charlizard’s rabble ransoms#introduction#intro post#blog intro#introductory post#pinned intro#pinned post#pinned info#read pinned#intro
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Hi! I don't want to start anything on here and am always willing for civil conversations. At this point there's so much I've found out about Seb (besides the video he liked, the tommy lee thing, and the girlfriend thing) that I feel so guilty if I would continue to support him. I love him sm but it just doesn't look good rn. He is associated/follows an organisation (for helping veterans) that has posted a blue lives matter flag picture and who's co-founder has sexual assault allegations against him, and worked with him in 'The last full measure'. His friend Paul Walter Hauser has done blackface in the past, and when called out on it he just listed a few people that also did blackface. There's more, I found a discussion on here that I can link. I seriously don't support "cancel culture" bc I don't think it helps anyone but there are just a lot of 'mistakes' and shady people that can be linked to Seb, I wish it wouldn't be that way. I honestly don't know what to think about it anymore.
Hi! I’m also open to having civil conversations and I don’t believe you’re trying to start anything. I really do think this situation of dragging up a four year old video and taking it completely out of context is harmful not just to Black people, but to fandom/activism in general. This is gonna be long because I’m going to take your points one by one, and I want to preface this by saying that I will not answer any derogatory, sideways asks pertaining to this subject. I will delete every single one and will block your silly ass. I’m not going to argue with people who think I’m blindly supporting Sebastian because I’m just trying to get fucked by him, or people who think I hate myself and am trying to appease some white man.
So, on with the discourse!
The video he liked - this video was taken completely out of context and that is my main issue with this whole situation. It was not a video of a white man saying that he thinks he should be able to say the n word as everyone claimed it was. They were quickly debating on whether or not it's okay to say in rap lyrics. He was told no, that's not okay, that's never okay and they moved on from it. That's it. End of story. That somehow was twisted into a click bait style headline of "Sebastian Stan likes a video of a white man defending his right to say the n word" when that is absolutely not true. My other issue is that people are more upset that Sebastian liked the video than they are about the white man in the video literally saying the n word. So, do you really care about the use of the n word like you're claiming? Cuz if you do, you'd be more upset at the white man that said the word than you would be about the white man simply liking the video. Or, are you just using this as an excuse to grandstand against a white man you don't like?
The Tommy Lee thing - Sebastian Stan playing Tommy Lee does not make Sebastian Stan a bad person. Is Charlize Theron a bad person for playing Aileen Wuornos, a prostitute who started murdering men? Is Leonardo DiCaprio a bad person for playing a slave owner? Is Edward Norton a bad person for playing a nazi sympathizing racist? Actors play bad people. That doesn't mean that they themselves are bad people. 1990's Tommy Lee was a bad person, but that should have no bearing on who Sebastian Stan is or his character as a man.
The gf/Paul Walter Hauser thing - Why are we holding Sebastian accountable for what the people around him are doing? Again, why are we more upset that Sebastian is associated with people who have done questionable things than the specific people themselves? I'm not going to speak on the kimono wearing -- I'm not Asian. It's not my place to say whether or not its offensive because it's not my culture, but she posted that picture and attended that party before she started dating Sebastian, quite possibly before she even knew him. Same with Paul. I think that black face thing was long before he knew Sebastian. Now, if Sebastian was defending these actions, going around saying "I think it's okay for white women to wear Kimono's" "I think black face is fine" "I think white people should be able to say the n word" then we'd have a different story, wouldn't we? But that's not what we have, and that's not what he is doing. He is not responsible for the things his friends do or have done in the past just because he's more famous than they are, and he is not required to speak on them. Let's put it this way -- would you be comfortable having to be responsible for something a friend of yours did before you knew them? Would you want to have to be forced to answer for your friend when you yourself had nothing to do with the questionable behavior?
The organization that supports the military/blue lives matter - Sebastian cannot control what message that foundation puts out and it does not mean that he is or is not pro-police himself. There is not enough concrete evidence -- if any evidence for that matter -- that Sebastian is a blue lives matter supporter. Did Sebastian donate before they put up the blue lives matter post? Or after? I don’t know, cuz I don’t follow him that closely, but if he donates before they come out with a particular stance, that means he should be held accountable for that? I know I donated to an organization once and they turned out to support something that i’m 100% against. That means I’m a bad person because I couldn’t see into the future? Another point, how can we be certain that Sebastian saw the blue lives matter post in the first place? I know I’m not online 24 hrs a day, I miss posts all the time and I’m just an average person. I make three or four tumblr posts a day, and I’m gone. I have to play catch up on social media, and even then, I still miss stuff. So I’m sure the same happens to a working actor. As for the co-founder, I don't know who this person is and would rather not get into any allegations against them because I don't want to trigger anyone who comes across this post. If Sebastian knows about these allegations, is a willing participant/supporter of this person then yeah, that's pretty shitty, but we don't know the inner workings of this friendship/acquaintance/work relationship. We don’t know how close they are or if they even still speak.
I’m a pretty big fan of Don Cheadle. He’s a stand up guy, he’s a great actor, he’s funny, he’s political and stands up for what he believes in and in a very public way. I support him. Don Cheadle is also friends with Chris Evans, RDJ, Mark Ruffalo, and Letitia Wright (just to name a few). Chris Evans has a bipartisan forum that highlights/promotes right wing politicians, RDJ defended Chris Pratt during the whole “he’s the worst Chris in Hollywood” crap, who’s technically done black face, and who once said to a female reporter “nice tits” when she walked into the room, Mark Ruffalo just walked back his support of Palestine, and Letitia Wright retweeted/supported an anti-vaxxer/anti-trans Pastor who equated an ingredient of the covid vaccine to the devil because it contained some parts of the word Lucifer. Does that mean Don is now a bad person because he’s friends with these people? Why isn’t he getting any heat for his friendships with them? Why isn’t he being held accountable for what they’ve done and said? Oh right, because he’s not a white fave. So people don’t care one way or the other, which brings me to my next point.
I can guarantee you that if Sebastian’s gf or Paul or this co-founder were not associated with Sebastian in any way, nobody would give a shit about her wearing a kimono, about Paul doing black face, or about the co-founder/organization being blue lives matter supporters and in that lies the actual problem. Being critical of people and their actions should be consistent and should happen all the time -- not just when they interact with your white fave. That’s when it becomes performative and looks like you just want to be able to show internet people that you follow/support/stan unproblematic celebrities, when really, you don’t care.
I think the moral of this post is that I think it's unfair to hold a complete stranger to a standard that I cannot hold myself to. I also don't view celebrities the way most teenagers/twenty somethings do, and that’s because when I entered fandom we didn't have social media, so I grew up with a wall between myself and said celebrities. There is no wall now with the presence of social media. "Fans" nowadays have a weird ownership feeling over celebrities because they can read their personal thoughts or view personal pictures and think that they have this personal quasi-friendship with them. I can't get on board with that. I prefer having the wall and I still keep the wall.
If supporting Sebastian makes you uncomfortable, then by all means, stop supporting him. Just make sure you are making this decision for yourself based on credible sources and concrete evidence and that you're not letting this fake woke activist mob make you feel uncomfortable. Internet activism means nothing unless you put your money where your mouth is in your real life and 90% of the social justice internet warriors do not. Real activism is bigger than changing your avi to a black square.
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This morning, I read an article titled “I went undercover in the sinister world of Meghan Markle hate accounts" posted to Refinery 29. The title gives the impression of a journalist disguising one’s self as a “Meghan Markle hater” for the sake of getting to the bottom of something. However, the content of the article is nothing like its title.
Before I go further, let me stress the importance of perspective. My post isn’t an attack on the article’s author. I’ve never even heard of the author before now, and I’ve no right or reason to attack a perfect stranger because I vehemently disagree with the content of their work. Making assumptions about someone solely on what they write is lazy and sloppy in my opinion. I may be lazy and sloppy, but a hypocrite I try not to be. Therefore, go forward remembering my issues are with content, not creator.
The article starts out explaining the origins of the term “Megxit”. It continues with other hashtags, conspiracy theories, and so on. The article even mentions various media platforms “attacking" the Duchess, as well as crude posts witnessed by the author.
Then the name dropping begins. First with Murky Meg, then Sue Blackhurst, then According2Taz, then Skippyv20 on Tumblr, then Yankee Wally. Eventually, names of Royal Rota journalists are dropped. Then people like Angela Levin and Omid Scobie get mentioned, with interviews from the latter. Instead of an undercover sting, we get a “Who’s Who" of Megxit, a few anonymous Sussex Squad quotations, and Omid trying his best to be fair.
What this article accomplishes is very little when it comes to objectivity. The title is a misconception, and the content essentially paints targets on the backs of the people the author carelessly considers “Meghan Markle Haters". The article reduces anyone who disagrees with Meghan’s behavior as racist, misogynist, conspiracy theorist nutters. So, not only is the content of the article sloppy and lazy, it also lacks originality. We’ve all heard this sad song-and-dance number a million times.
I guess at face value, it becomes very easy, effortless really, for outsiders looking in to reduce an entire group of people with similar views to the basic stereotypes as old as time. It takes very little thought, consideration, or critical analysis, to assume things because they seem to correlate. But correlation is not causation. Just because some people opposing of Meghan Markle’s behavior happen to be racist doesn’t mean every single opposing person is also racist. Again, lazy and sloppy.
Just like assuming every single Meghan Markle fan is also vegan, anti-monarchy, feminist, woke warriors is downright sloppy and lazy. This author has personally interacted with and found common ground with Sussex Squad people many times. Some even became social media friends. They believe what they do, and I believe what I do. We do not agree with most things regarding Harry and Meghan, but we do agree to disagree and be civil.
So, contrary to the article, not all people “hate" Meghan Markle just because they detest her behavior. It’s important to remember extremes exist for all spectrums. Every topic, especially those politicized or made popular by media platforms, have extremes. There is no denying the fact that there are people who hate Meghan Markle because of her ethnicity. Those extremists who hate Meghan for her ethnicity ironically do not discriminate, though. If they hate her for her ethnicity, they hate ALL people of that same ethnicity.
On the flip side of this coin, is the other extreme. The face is the same on each side because the face represents extremism. There is no denying the fact that there are extremists who see anyone opposing Meghan as racists. Extremists who, by default, view every issue in the world through the lens of racism. While racism is a serious problem that deserves no place in society, assuming racism is the root cause of every conflict is also lazy and sloppy. And the same could be said that these extremists do not discriminate, either. If they see race as the only issue for why people “hate" Meghan Markle, they see race as the only issue for most everything.
The problem with both extremes is when everything and everyone is reduced to racial identity, racism only continues to exist. A racist using skin color as a disqualifier perpetuates racism. Assuming racism is the only reason behind disdain for someone only perpetuates racism. Focusing on race or racism allows no room for content of character.
Especially when people defend Meghan Markle being the victim of racism with a racist rule. When opposing critics say “I didn’t even know she was Black" or suggest her physical features, her Hollywood CV, or past involvement with Black causes were nonexistent before she became a duchess or stepped down from being a working royal, the extremists on the other side often resort to the One Drop Rule.
Which means their defense for calling Meghan Markle “haters" racists, even though they might have never knew she was mixed race, is a form of racism. The One Drop Rule was borne from the Reconstruction Era post-Civil War. The “rule" essentially said anyone who appeared to have Black features were considered Black.
The One Drop Rule was the precursor and eventual backbone to Jim Crow Laws of the South. It was used to oppress and segregate Americans based on physical appearance. Considering most people who never heard of Meghan before Harry came along were ignorant to her mixed heritage, it seems grossly negligent to assume race is the real issue. How can one be racist toward Meghan when they didn’t know she was mixed race? This author wasn’t aware of Meghan’s ethnicity prior to it being pointed out (by her and Harry. Repeatedly.), mainly because this author didn’t care.
Like so many, when I first saw Meghan and Harry together for the engagement interview, I was more excited about a fellow American joining the Royal Family. After learning she was biracial, well it was even better. It represented change and progress. Does that mean I saw the Royal Family as racists beforehand? No. It means I saw them as exactly the opposite. Had they been racist, she’d not be a duchess. Her being American and divorced was more a shock to me than being mixed.
The point of all this is there are extremists on every spectrum. For a journalist to say they went undercover, when in fact they did not, to expose the true motives behind Meghan Markle “haters", only to find they did very little to really understand the other side was disappointing. Not surprising, just disappointing. This could’ve been an excellent opportunity for someone to take the reigns and make bridges between two very passionate factions. Instead it became nothing more than a hit piece.
The article fails to acknowledge the possibility – no, the probability – that most people who object to Meghan Markle do so because of how she behaves. The article only considers one possibility behind this “hate". And by calling the objections “hate", the article in turn defines all criticisms as hate speech. Again, unoriginal, sloppy, and lazy.
So here we have it, yet another article grouping and stereotyping anyone who disapproves of Meghan and Harry as racist haters. Yet again, another article name dropping people “deemed racist haters", essentially painting even bigger targets on the backs of those people. Like they didn’t already have enough hate mail. Yet again, another sloppy, lazy, article that never digs below the surface to understand why instead of assuming it.
This isn’t new, it’s just another slop drop from the sensationalism machine that has replaced fair, legitimate journalism. It would be different if there weren’t so many questions surrounding the births. It would be different if Meghan Markle actually lived by the example she so vehemently preaches. It would be different if Meghan Markle would make amends with her own family before telling the world how they should treat people. It would be different if Meghan Markle were a strong woman instead of claiming to be one.
But it’s not different. She hasn’t spoken to her father since two days before her wedding three years ago. She denies the family connections that existed before her fame. She ghosts people once they are no longer of benefit. She preaches equality and universal service while using her title every chance given. She and her husband criticize the “family she never had" while naming their second child after that family’s Matriarch. All of those are behaviors that incite strong emotional responses. Behaviors. And behavior has no racial identity.
A final note… hypocrisy is the main reason people have issues with anything. When one group of people tells another group to stop attacking a public figure, while using assumptions as their crusade call, it’s hypocrisy. One cannot say “if you can’t take the heat, then shut up!” to another without being a hypocrite. When that happens, don’t be surprised when the same exact thing is said back. If Meghan or her fans can’t take the criticism, they shouldn’t participate in it. We all have the right to choose. Just like if I couldn’t handle the criticism, I’d not be writing this.
Life is not fair. The world is a dark, cruel place. When we expect the world to bend to the will of a few, we are setting ourselves above the majority. A strong woman would know this. A strong woman fighting for others would also know that the only person responsible for how one feels is one’s self. External feedback isn’t responsible for internal turmoil. Internal feedback is. That is all.
REFERENCE:
Amoako, A. (2021 June 11). I went undercover in the sinister world of Meghan Markle hate accounts. Refinery29. Retrieved from: https://www.refinery29.com/en-gb/2021/06/10518195/megxit-meghan-markle-anti-fandom
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According to halacha, which actions are Azula liable for?
Reposted from my Tumblr.
One of my favorite ways to study Jewish texts is to take a fictional character or situation and examine it through the lens of Jewish text and tradition.
I’ve done this before with ABC’s Once Upon A Time. Now I’m going to take up this exercise again with Avatar: The Last Airbender.
Before I begin, a few things to keep in mind.
I’m not a Talmud scholar.
There is no definitive Jewish Opinion™ about any issue pertaining to halacha. Unanimous opinions on halacha are so rare that when we find one, we assume something went wrong in the process..
Azula is a morally polarizing character in AtLA fandom. Regardless of who you ask, you’re bound to get some strong opinions about exactly what she’s done, the extent to which she’s responsible for it, and what this says about her morality or lack thereof. I’m not going to rehash those arguments. I think I’ve made it clear that I care less about whether people approve of her behavior than I do about how their statements about her reinforce harmful messages about women, people of color, LGBT people and mentally ill people.
Nevertheless, she’s incredibly interesting, and studying Jewish text is fun, so here we are.
Why examine Azula’s actions through the lens of halacha?
Halacha gets a lot of flack because it comes off as excessively legalistic. But, in my opinion, that’s based on a misunderstanding of what halacha is. Usually translated as “Jewish law,” the word halacha actually comes from the root word that means “to go/walk.”
Halacha is not a collection of rules for the sake of having rules. It’s meant to take us somewhere. You can write a library of books about exactly what that is and what it means. But for the sake of simplicity, halacha is how we show that we recognize the holiness of everything in creation. So we aim to do right by one another, by the land we live in and by the creatures we share this world with.
Before we can launch into examining the halachic ramifications of the things Azula does, we need to establish some boundaries.
Only the show counts. It’s the common frame of reference universally accepted by the vast majority of fandom. Fandom’s stances on the comics, novelizations and other tie-in materials are too variable to base an analysis on.
Word of God is immaterial. While some would use the phrase Death of the Author, Jewish tradition has a more entertaining take on it. In the Talmud, there’s a dispute between Rabbi Eliezer and some of his peers. In that story, Rabbi Eliezer says that if he’s right, this or that miraculous thing would happen, and those miraculous things do happen. But the other rabbis still reject it because we don’t determine halacha by miraculous signs. Eventually, God parts the heavens and says, “Rabbi Eliezer is right.” But another rabbi responds, “The Torah is not in heaven,” meaning that the Torah was meant for human beings on earth to interpret for themselves. And God’s response? To smile and say, “My children have defeated Me.”
Now, let’s begin.
Is Azula bound by halacha?
She’s not Jewish, so no. However, all human beings are bound by the Noahide laws. For the sake of argument, let’s say that the Noahide covenant applies to all humans on all worlds. According to the Talmud (Sanhedrin 56a.24):
Since the halakhot of the descendants of Noah have been mentioned, a full discussion of the Noahide mitzvot is presented. The Sages taught in a baraita: The descendants of Noah, i.e., all of humanity, were commanded to observe seven mitzvot: The mitzva of establishing courts of judgment; and the prohibition against blessing, i.e., cursing, the name of God; and the prohibition of idol worship; and the prohibition against forbidden sexual relations; and the prohibition of bloodshed; and the prohibition of robbery; and the prohibition against eating a limb from a living animal.
What is Azula’s legal status?
In any case, we know the rules, and now we have to decide whether Azula broke them or not, right?
Not so fast.
First, we have to determine if Azula is of the appropriate legal status to be held accountable for upholding the Noahide laws. In other words: when she committed certain acts, was Azula an adult capable of making rational decisions?
Clear your mind of the idea that being an adult is the same as being a grownup. Instead, think of it as a term that defines when people can make legally binding decisions.
As far as I can tell, the Talmud doesn’t say when a gentile becomes an adult. However, we can use halacha as a guide.
Now for a warning.
If frank talk about the physical development of adolescents makes you uncomfortable, you might want to skip this next part. There’s nothing graphic or titillating about what I’m going to discuss, but if breasts and pubic hair squick you out, skip this part until I say it’s safe in bold like this.
According to halacha, a girl reaches adulthood when she’s twelve years and one day old and has two pubic hairs. Yeah, you read that right. Twelve and two pubes are the requirement. Before this point, nothing she does is legally binding, even if she’s really smart and claims to be fully aware of what she’s doing. After this point, her actions are legally binding, even if she says she had no idea what she was doing.
On the show, we see Azula in a range of ages. In “Zuko Alone,” we see her at roughly eight years old. In “The Storm,” she’s about eleven. In all the other episodes she’s in, she’s fourteen. So, from a legal standpoint, flashback!Azula is too young for her actions to be legally binding. At that point in time, the responsibility would fall to her parents.
Um, I’m not willing to speculate about the genitals of an underage cartoon character, so for the sake of argument, I’m assuming that 14-year-old Azula meets the two pubes requirement. Thus, 14-year-old Azula is responsible for her actions.
If you skipped that last part, it’s safe to continue now.
OK, we’ve established that flashback!Azula is too young for her actions to be legally binding, but in the main story, Azula is legally an adult and responsible for her actions.
We good? Alright.
Which Noahide laws does Azula actually break?
This is both easier and harder than it seems.
The laws about idol worship, cursing God, and forbidden sexual acts don’t apply to her because neither religion nor sex are portrayed as such on the show. Also, the law about establishing courts of justice is a communal obligation, not one that falls on a single individual, so that’s another one we don’t have to concern ourselves with.
That leaves the prohibitions against bloodshed, robbery and eating a limb cut from a living animal.
First up: bloodshed.
The connotation of the prohibition against bloodshed is not for general acts of violence, but actual murder.
Here’s where I think I’m going to throw a lot of people for a loop. Azula doesn’t kill anyone on the show. She tries. She comes close. She wouldn’t lose sleep over it if she did. But nobody’s dead because of her. She doesn’t even take lives as collateral damage.
One could argue that zapping Aang with lightning counts as killing, but when the Sages talk about death and dying, I assume they mean the kind where the dead stay dead, not people who are revived by magic spirit water. Furthermore, if someone’s about to kill you (and I think entering the Avatar State qualifies here), you are halachically obligated to save your own life, even if it means killing that person.
Second: robbery.
We’ll come back to that.
Third: eating a limb from a living animal.
This prohibition is often expanded to incorporate all forms of animal cruelty.
The show does portray animal cruelty. We see a prime example with the circus in “Appa’s Lost Days.”
But what about Azula? We don’t see her interact with many animals on the show, but there are two notable examples: Appa the sky bison in “Appa’s Lost Days” and Bosco the bear in “The Crossroads of Destiny.”
How does her behavior measure up? Despite her earlier behavior of terrorizing turtleducks, Azula does not harm either Appa or Bosco.
On the show, Mai and Ty Lee are seen spending time with Bosco in the throne room while the Earth King is imprisoned. So, at the very least, they treat the bear well.
So, Azula is not liable for animal cruelty.
*hands Azula her Not As Big A Jerk As She Could Have Been award*
Now, let’s revisit that prohibition against robbery.
Given the prescribed punishment (decapitation), the connotation seems to be taking the rightful property of another through violent means. That being said, the prohibition against robbery is often extended to include all sorts of theft.
This one might have some legs. On the show, does Azula take the rightful property of another, and does she use violent means to do so?
Absolutely.
A major example is stealing the clothes of the Kyoshi Warriors after defeating them in combat.
But!
The show takes place during a time of war, and the Kyoshi Warriors, as allies of the Avatar, are enemies of the Fire Nation. So does beating them up and taking their uniforms fall under the prohibition against robbery, or are the Kyoshi Warrior uniforms considered the spoils of war and thus free for the taking?
Halachically speaking, it might actually be the latter. When fighting the Kyoshi Warriors, Azula acts as a military commander during a time of war and achieves a decisive victory against an elite combat unit. Thus, she is entitled to take their stuff.
So, back to the original question: which actions does Azula commit during the show that she’s halachically liable for?
The answer, shockingly, may be: none.
On the show, we’re encouraged to think of Azula as a Very Bad Girl who does Very Bad Things. She’s calculating, ruthless and deceptive. She’s also full of herself. She’s not someone who inspires warm, fuzzy feelings in most people. But when you put her actions under the microscope, she exercises remarkable restraint compared to what she’s capable of.
Don’t worry. No one’s going to nominate her for a Nobel Peace Prize just yet. This is Azula we’re talking about. She’s not acting out of an overwhelming love for humanity. But it is interesting that despite her threats to kill, maim and destroy, she doesn’t participate in wanton destruction or wasteful loss of life.
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how’d u get into writing? like, writing fic and being part of the silm community, being Known, that stuff? i’m really new to being a silm cc and i’d love to know ur advice! also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs? bc i have a Lot of hcs and meta ideas but also i’m really anxious abt posting them bc yknow anxiety is like that
these are some great questions, anon! I’m gonna go through them one by one :)
how’d u get into writing?
not to be like, super cliche, but I’ve...kind of always been a writer? as long as I can remember I’ve been telling stories, and when I was too young to read or write I would dictate them to my mom, who would type them up for me and help me choose clipart illustrations to accompany them. when I got old enough I would always be writing; I attempted my first novel at age 9, and while that never really went anywhere I did finish the darn thing and it had some pretty sophisticated plot twists for a 9-year-old!
like, writing fic
around the same time I got into fandom! I was deep into Warrior cats (like. really deep) and I believe I started writing my first fics when I was like? 10 or 11? my memory is kind of fuzzy on the order of things, but I know I got an account on the Warriors forums when I was 9, and that I was already posting my fic there when I made my FFN account. I believe I was 12 when that happened, but who knows. I haven’t the faintest idea of what happened with those forums, but uhhh pretty much all of my Warriors fic is still up on FFN lmao. you could probably find that if you want to but um...maybe don’t?
my first Big Fic was a self-insert of...my entire 5th/6th grade class into the then-current timeline of the Warriors books...well. I honestly think that might still be my most popular fic of all time l m a o though I try not to think about it because Hashtag Cringe. though as much as I look back on that time with a “yikes,” I am very grateful for the Warriors fandom in a way? that place was so accepting and encouraging of OCs, of AUs, of completely disregarding canon, of worldbuilding that is completely alien from canon - it was a fantastic sandbox to begin with, there were so many ways to write stories and practically all of them were accepted and had fellow fans invested in them!
and being part of the silm community,
soooo I wrote Warriors fic until my freshman year of high school (wow sdjfhkdsjfh), which was when BOTFA came out, and I was absolutely wrecked by the ending and immediately started writing my own fixit fic. I was also super hooked on Kiliel! so that was my intro to the Tolkien fandom; and simultaneously, I joined tumblr, and, well, the rest is history tbh.
I honestly do not remember when I first read the Silm, but I kind of got into the more obscure parts of the Tolkien fandom through fandom osmosis, and I do have a vague memory of doodling the Finwean family tree in geometry class so it might have been later on in freshman year? that was also the same time I was having my Queer Awakening, and Russingon definitely contributed to me unlearning my internalized queerphobia, so probably around then.
anyway - queer awakening, tumblr, Tolkien, transitioning from FFN to AO3 - all of that was happening around the same time. I know I dipped my toes in the Silm fandom then, but I was still primarily a Hobbit fic writer focusing on Kiliel. toward the end of high school I kind of shifted to LOTR and (qp) Gigolas...but somehow the Silm fandom is the most active of the Big Three within the Tolkien fandom, and I was getting dragged further and further in.
it wasn’t until @backtomiddleearthmonth 2019, my freshman year of college, that I really dove into writing Silm fic! I picked some Silm-specific bingo cards and never looked back :D that was really not all that long ago but I am obsessed in a way I don’t really remember being even with TH/LOTR, I obviously cannot see the future but I anticipate hanging out here for a long time. the Silm fandom is great overall and there’s just so much material to work with!! <3
being Known, that stuff?
so I don’t really have a whole lot of context on how “well known” I am in the fandom?? definitely within the past year and a half or so I’ve noticed that I like, get asks like this, and get a significant amount of notes on my posts, and I’ve made a lot of fandom friends especially since I joined some Silm servers on Discord (hmu if you want invites; I’m on the SWG server and 2 general Silm servers and the Russingon server) this past year. and I have 3,000 followers as of this month - and while ever since I hit 1k I don’t particularly pay attention to my follower count I can definitely say that I have more engagement now than I used to! but it took me a long time to build this “audience,” I suppose; I’ve been around the Tolkien fandom since late 2014, so nearly 6 years of this, lol.
really the best way to build a following, in my experience, is to just post a lot of stuff. when I started making edits I got a lot more engagement, because for a long time I would post one every day! (I made them in batches and queued them; I didn’t actually make one every day lol...and now I’m too busy to do that, so I just make edits for events and whenever I feel like it) And I have [checks ao3] 145 works in the Silm fandom as of today - I’m fairly prolific! I’ve come to generally expect 3-10 comments on most of my oneshots, which is a lot more than I used to have back in the day. consistency and quantity are more likely to attract people to your work - and quality, of course.
also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs?
I’ve been writing since I was very young, and I’ve been writing fic for like...11 years? I think? in that time I’ve produced a lot of garbage, but imo most of that was in my Warrior cats phase, so I came into the Tolkien fandom with confidence in myself and my writing. I’m also working on original fiction on the side (I hope to eventually become a published fantasy author, but right now school takes up most of my time that I don’t devote to fandom, which gives me more immediate gratification and also is just Very Fun) and I know I’m a good writer.
basically, I’ve been doing this for like...half my life, and I’m still fairly young, so I’ve had time to build up my skill and confidence and I know I’m only going to get better with time. you will get better with practice. like I said, I’ve written a lot of terrible stuff, and it’s only through sucking for a long time that I’ve gotten to the point I am now. and I am far from perfect; I know I still have lots of room to grow!
for meta and headcanons specifically, I started with writing fic, and then when I didn’t think I could stretch something into an entire fic I would just make a hc post. I have a vivid memory of writing my first meta in a notebook during driver’s ed because it was so goddamn boring and I had Thoughts about Tauriel and Thranduil!
in my experience, meta comes from having Opinions and wanting to share them and most importantly to back them up - you need to have sources! you need to have reasons! you need to have justification! otherwise it’s not meta, it’s a headcanon or an AU. which is fine!! I love hc/AU!!! but they are not the same as meta, and I’m a stickler for being accurate when it comes to meta. if you have sources and shit to back you up, that will help you build the confidence to share your meta.
sharing disinformation and passing it off as meta instead of just coming out and saying this is a headcanon/baseless theory/AU or whatever is such a fandom pet peeve of mine; it’s not bad for something to not be Accurate! you just have to have that disclaimer - and even when you’re writing meta, you’re offering an interpretation of the text, and you need to acknowledge that other interpretations also exist and are valid.
um. I hope this answers your questions? and sorry for basically word-vomiting my entire life story, lol. this post got long; the main reason I’ve written so much fic is because I really just cannot shut up for the life of me. sooo if you can tear of that filter of being shy and just. say shit. you can go so far~!
OH and one more thing - I can’t believe I almost forgot this - but part of being a writer is participating in the community. this is code for LEAVE A DAMN COMMENT IF YOU LIKE A FIC. that’s how I made most of my fandom friends before Discord! I follow @ao3feed-silmarillion and stalk that blog for new Silm fics; I read the ones that interest me and comment on them.
I know this is not really the most common way for folks to find fic but it’s so rewarding to interact with new fic, new writers, new commentors, new stories - you can find gems that don’t rise to the top of the kudos/bookmark lists; you become friends with your fellow writers; you can watch people grow and change; you support smaller content creators. yeah, you might not be getting Just The Best Stuff, but it’s so so so worth it!!
and if you make friends in the comment section of other people’s fic - I guarantee you some of them will go to your AO3 profile and check out your fic, too! and they’ll leave comments! this is a fic community, and that’s what I cherish about fandom most of all, tbh.
anyway - again - sorry for rambling so much, but I hoped this helped! feel free to send in another ask, or to come talk to me off anon if you’d like! and definitely send me your stuff if/when you decide to share it; I would love to support you!!! <3
#silm#silm fandom#silmarillion#fan culture#tmi anna#(for real this time sjdfhdkfh)#tefain nin#long post#anon#answers
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FICTOBER 2020 - day twenty-five
Prompt #25: “Sometimes you can even see.”
Fandom: The Old Guard
Characters: Nile Freeman, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani
Words: 1937
Author’s Note: In the aftermath of a rough mission and all the philosophical questions it entails, Joe takes Nile to the Aarhus Art Museum in Denmark. All pieces mentioned were displayed in the Objects of Wonder: From Pedestal to Interaction exhibit, which ran from Oct. 2019- March 2020. Nile POV.
>> the sweetness remains
Nile scrolls mindlessly through Pinterest, wishing for not the first time that she’d been allowed to recreate her socials.
Copley had barred her from practically all of the actually useful ones, but she’d bullied him down to just having an account on Pinterest, with the argument being that no one cared about the site. Granted, she doesn’t really want to be on Pinterest either, but sometimes the comfort of an app with infinite scroll is all she’s looking for in a distraction.
And right now, she really, really needs to be distracted.
Overly photoshopped cat pics.
Memes ripped straight from tumblr or twitter.
The most white girl aesthetic imaginable.
Three slugs ripping through her abdomen and spitting her liver out the other side—
Nile breathes in sharply. Exhales.
Her thumb resumes scrolling.
Photos of downtown that feel like home.
Recipes for harvest butternut squash soup.
Tips for keeping braids fresh longer.
Nile scrolls, and scrolls, and breathes.
Her abdomen still aches every time her lungs expand, even though she knows it really doesn’t. It’s perfectly healed; not even a scar for her troubles. But it’s hard to forget how her instincts had screamed that a gut shot like that shouldn’t be survivable, even as she pushed herself towards the next target.
(She didn’t survive it.)
(She didn’t survive the next half dozen times it happened, either.)
“Did that phone of yours do something to offend you?”
“Whoa!” Joe’s sudden appearance next to her only makes her clench her phone tighter. She forces out a laugh and eases the tension out of her fingers. “Feel like you should know better than to sneak up on someone that’s part of a bunch of immortal warriors.”
“Most of them would have caught me coming long before you did.”
Nile snorts. She scrolls a few more seconds, then closes the app and opens Temple Run. The game’s ridiculously old, but she’s a millennial. Sue her for being nostalgic.
She can feel Joe watching her as she starts the round.
“Am I correct in thinking you enjoy the arts, Nile?”
It’s not the question she was expecting, and she winds up tilting the screen to the left a half second late, and her character falls off the bridge.
It’s okay though, because she can just use a gem and respawn in the same place, so it’s basically like not dying at all.
Right?
“Uh, yeah,” she says. She winds up restarting the round entirely. “The military was supposed to pay for my degree, but I don’t think I can cash that if I’m technically KIA.”
“That would present a certain set of problems,” Joe agrees. “Andy talk to you about that?”
“Yeah.” Nile’s stomach twists. “Guess it depends on how easy it is to schedule classes between firefights.”
She’s practically laying the opening for a talk out herself, but Joe seems uninterested in taking it.
Instead, he shifts beside her, propping an elbow on his knee. “What kinds of art did you want to specialize in?”
She dies again. This time, she begrudgingly uses the in-game save. "I prefer classic sculpture, but I’m not against modern.”
“You like what was modern art for me, then.”
Nile rolls her eyes. “I dread the day I become as weird as you guys.”
He laughs, patting her on the shoulder as he stands. “I suspect by that time you’ll be too busy tormenting our next recruit. But unfortunately, the exhibit we’re going to will be more in the contemporary style.”
It takes Nile a half second to register his words. “Wait, what?”
“The description said it would be 1960s to the present only. If it suits you, we could hold off on our discussion of it for another thousand years or so. I’m sure we can claim it as classic at that point.”
“What?” Nile locks her phone and zeros her attention on him, registering the mischievous glint in his eyes this time. “Museum?”
“The Aarhus Art Museum has a special exhibit on loan from the Tate Modern at the moment.” He glances down at her phone, the corner of his mouth forming a grin. “I’m told its purpose is to help move its audience’s attention from their devices.”
Nile scowls and looks back down at her phone. “I died a dozen times yesterday. I’m allowed my coping mechanisms of choice.”
And.
Whoops.
“Of course you are,” Joe says, offering his hand to her, and she’s once again surprised he doesn’t force the conversation. “But phones are portable. You can take it with you to the museum.”
Nile worries at the edge of her lip with her teeth. She doesn’t really want to go anywhere right now, but…
But Joe’s brown eyes are warm and welcoming, and his callouses help steady her when she takes his hand.
“You said contemporary sculpture?”
The grin he gives her is blinding. “For now.”
_________________
It’s a twenty-five minute drive from their safe house to the museum, and the route takes them next to the Bay of Aarhus for most of it.
Nile stares out at the water, determined to not give Joe any more ammunition for making fun of her regarding her phone.
It’s hard. She’d never considered herself a technology addict—never had enough time to be one—but she really, really wants to stop thinking about the fact that she knows what the inside of her liver looks like.
Or did look like, she guesses.
Nope, nuh-uh, not going there—
“D'you know about the Ship of Theseus?” She spits it out before she can decide against it. She figures if she’s thinking about it, she might as well talk about it. “And don’t say you were there for it. You’re not Andy and I at least know enough about you to know when you’re lying.”
The grin on his face tells her that he was very much intending to before she called him out on it. “It’s a thought experiment. The character Theseus owns a ship that, over a long span of time, has all of its parts replaced, until nothing of the original still remains.”
“Yeah, and so then the question is, is it even the same ship,” Nile finishes.
Joe weaves in and out of traffic, a pensive look on his face. “I assume you aren’t asking simply to test my knowledge of early western philosophy.”
“No.”
Nile looks down at her hands. She can still remember how horrifically mangled they were from her impromptu dive off a skyscraper, but at least—at least she’s pretty sure they’re the same ones she had before.
Though that might not last long.
“In your opinion,” she says, cautiously, “if—if there’s nothing left of the original—if you have to rebuild something that many times—”
“Nile.” The sound of the car’s turn signal distracts her spiraling thoughts. Joe nods towards the windshield. “We’re here.”
It’s a large, red brick square building, fairly nondescript but for the circular and multi-colored glass walking track at its top.
“Come on, he says, parking the car. “I find physical objects superior to mental ones for solving such issues.”
Nile doesn’t understand why the one time she wants to talk about something like this is the one time Joe decides to go full mysterious.
She climbs out of the car and follows him inside.
Despite her misgivings, she quickly discovers Joe was right. The exhibit is genuinely incredible, and there are pieces from multiple names she recognizes—Anish Kapoor, Donald Judd, Rasheed Araeen—and pieces she finds herself strangely moved by, such as Damian Hirst’s Away from the Flock, Richard Long’s Red Slate Circle, Rachel Whiteread’s Airbed II. Nile stares at that last one in particular for a long time: a concrete casting of an airbed, the artist’s presence made known in the negative space where her body had pressed the material down.
Joe, however, seems to be moving with a specific purpose in mind, and it’s not until they round one of the walls of the orange-pink room that Nile has a guess as to what it is.
In the far corner, bathed in the additional light of a single fill light, is a massive pile of multicolored cellophane wrapped hard candies.
Joe walks her over to it, an almost reverence to his steps.
“Untitled: Portrait of Ross in LA,” he says. “Are you familiar with the piece?”
She shakes her head, bending down to inspect it. It doesn’t look like much more than what she’d seen from a distance—candy, multicolored, on the floor. She looks to Joe for an explanation.
“Felix Gonzalez-Torres’s partner died from AIDS,” Joe says. The grief on his face is hard to look at. “To honor him, he made this as a portrait—one hundred and seventy-five pounds of candy, representing Ross’s weight from when he was still healthy.”
Nile looks at the pile—it’s a lot, but it’s not a hundred and seventy-five pounds worth of a lot.
Joe notices her confusion and smiles. “Take one.”
“What?”
“Take one,” he repeats. “The purpose of the work is to invite you to partake in both enjoying his presence and lamenting the lack of it. A sort of communion—choosing to take part of his body into your own. It was a powerful statement when so many were afraid to even be in our presence at the time.”
Nile looks at the pile again, and just like with Airbed II, her heart aches at what isn’t there, rather than what is. She selects a red piece and brings it out of the pile, cupping it in her hand and considering its weight.
“What happens when it runs out?”
Joe selects his own piece—a green one—and it rolls around in the palm of his hand. “It has. Many times. But that’s the beauty of it—it’s the curator’s responsibility to replenish the pile, metaphorically granting immortality and new life to the loss.”
The cellophane crinkles in Nile’s hand as she unwraps the piece. “How do they decide where to get the candy from?”
“The only firm rule is the original weight. Outside of that, there are no set instructions for the candies themselves.” He chuckles, threading his fingers behind his neck and leaning back against the wall. “Sometimes you can even see these strange combinations of greens, oranges, and purples.”
Nile considers the candy. “Not your favorite?”
“It has an almost Halloween quality to it. I tend to prefer the rainbow.”
The candy in her hand feels heavier than it did before—weighed down with the knowledge of what it represents, what it’s taking away.
She slips the candy into her mouth and her eyebrows raise in surprise. “It’s sweet?”
“It’s candy,” Joe says, unwrapping his own piece. “Did you expect something else?”
“I thought it’d be…” She pauses, trying to parse out her feelings. “Bitter. Or sad, somehow. Considering.”
“It could have been,” Joe agrees. “But the portrait isn’t meant to represent just grief and loss. Candy is a happy thing—a reward for yourself, or a lover’s gift on Valentine’s. And even when it’s gone, the sweetness remains. Still lingering on the tongue, or dwelling in the mind. It is the love of friends and partners that keeps the memory alive—and what keeps this the same portrait, even though its pieces have been cycled through many times.”
The candy melts away on her tongue, and she closes her eyes in grief for its loss, appreciation for what it was, and hope for the pieces that would come after it.
She swallows the last piece of it down.
Her stomach settles.
#fictober20#fanfiction#the old guard#nile freeman#yusuf al-kaysani#joe | yusuf al-kaysani#philosophy and art#memsfic
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Took me a week but I'm here! I was tagged by @abstract-moth
1. Why did you choose your URL?
I decided to do a revamp of my blog last year after having the same blog url and set up for a few years.
I was really into this podcast called You're Wrong About at the time and they had a series on Jessica Simpson and during it they talked about some joke relating to her being made fun of for questioning why a can of tuna had the brand name Chicken of the Sea and i liked the sound of 'of the sea' as the name of something and subed in 'mango' because I really like mangoes and I thought the name as a whole had a cool vibe to it (made these choices all in about 10 minutes the same day I was setting up my new laptop)
2. Any side blogs?
Technically 2 but I don't pose much to them :supernatural-art and spacewordwasaimingforozai, both from different eras of interests
3. How long have you been on Tumblr?
pfffft uhh I wanna say since about 2014 since I've had an account which went unused for around a year then started using it from the beginning of 2015
4. Do you have a queue tag?
sometimes I use q but I will just occasionally queue things really
5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?
I saw loads of screenshots on fb and pinterest of tumblr posts and they made me laugh and I wanted to get in on that, as well as hearing it was good for fandom
6. Why did you choose you icon/pfp?
It was when I was doing the blog revamp and I had the picture saved in a 'to draw' file and thought it was a good vibe
7. Why did you choose your header?
same reason as above but a meme folder
8. What’s your post with the most notes?
This one that I made before falling asleep and woke up to find a lot of people could relate then its just kept going up
9. How many mutuals do you have?
At least about 20 I think, some I don't interact with or see active anymore so probably more like 15 that I see regularly
10. How many followers do you have?
694 wow nice c'mon guys get me to 700
11. How many people do you follow?
398. I honestly thought it would be more
12. Have you ever made a shit post?
Probably????
13. How often do you use tumblr?
Basically every day minus when I delete the app from my mobile for whatever reason for a couple days and only use it sporadically on my computer and am active less
14. Did you ever have a fight/argument with another blog?
Had an argument briefly with someone on a post of mine a few years back about an opinion I had for a show (supernatural) and what they were doing with the plot. I think I technically won it mostly by not getting aggressive and just repeating it was an opinion I had that could maybe happen, but I found it so stressful I deleted all reblogs I had done with the discussion on lol
15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog” posts?
I think its nice to do and personally I really like reblogging basically everything but get that other people don't. It's something that can be nice to do and feels very tumblr exclusive which is why I like it I think
16. Do you like tag games?
I love them! So thanks @abstract-moth it's been fun getting tagged in stuff again as it's been a couple years since that's been consistent for me
17. Do you like ask games?
Also love!
18. Which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
I think maybe akaashiscupofwater as they seem present in the hq fandom quite a bit and I got super excited when they followed me
I’m tagging @wonderlandmoonrose7 , @gats-puckish-rogue , @flannel-wearing-warrior (absolutely no pressure though), and anyone else that wants to do this :)
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Author Interview
I was tagged by @sleepswithvillains . I’ve never been tagged much before so this is kind of new for me, but I love it! Tag me all the time! Also you did it again, where I got the Tumblr notification like right as I went to bed, but my sleep schedule is so wack right now.
Tagging: @guardianofrivendell @moriamithril @sunflower1000 and really whoever wants to do it. Drop me a tag if you decide to do it because I definitely want to see what you have to say!
I have a lot of unfinished fics and not a lot of published works in comparison.
1. Name: The Merriweather Mage (Tumblr)/ RinzlersGhost (AO3)
2. Fandoms: LOTR/The Hobbit, The Witcher (TV), SWTOR/Star Wars, Pirates of the Caribbean, Harry Potter, Twilight, Underworld (though I’m not active in most of them unless I’m hyper-fixating)
3. Where you post: AO3, Tumblr, and I have an inactive FF.NET account
4. Most popular oneshot: People seem to have a real affinity for Meleth-nin/My Love. I actually hated writing it, because I was in such a bad place after receiving news that my childhood dog had died, but I don’t hate the fic itself.
5. Most popular multichapter: Every Kitten Has Claws which is a Geralt X Druid Fem!Reader. 25 Kudos, 3 bookmarks, 517 hits. Followed by Turuhalme in the Greenwood which is Thranduil X Fem!Reader. 9 Kudos, 1 bookmark, 270 hits. Both contain 18+ Content.
6. Actual worst part of writing: I legitimately hate writing fight scenes. I’m horrible at them and most of my fics contain some sort of fight scene obnoxiously enough. Although the best advice I ever saw on here was to keep your fight scenes short because not very many people are interested in a long drawn out detailed fight scene.
7. Favorite story you wrote: Bards & Beans Coffee Co. Elrond X Fem!Reader. Was the first time I’d ever written anything in the second person. I based it off of a dream I had about meeting Elrond in a coffee shop. I planned it, wrote it, and posted it in the span of four days. It’s basically as if Middle Earth exists on the other side of meridian locks, and it’s set during the War of the Ring but with some of the characters from the Hobbit so the timelines are pretty pushed together. Your side of the meridian locks has a Earth that is basically a continuous strip of land that varies from high-tech futuristic ports all the way down to medieval ports. Basically the farther North you go, the more high tech and futuristic the land becomes. Quite a shock for those who would have never been to the other side of the locks. 18+ Content.
8. Story you were nervous to post: Most likely all of them. Any of my Twilight work though, I always hesitate about publishing. Sometimes it’s because the stories are close to my heart, but I also know that the fandom can be rabid. Most of the interactions I’ve ever had with Twilight blogs are fine, but there’s a lot of discourse about Twilight right now, and while I appreciate that most people are in the right (the issue with the Quileute tribe, the Cullen’s as villains, Jasper and the Confederacy, the actual legitimacy of the Volturi as a ruling body, etc), this is actually one of the reasons I left the fandom from a writing/following POV. (There are many, many things that are wrong with Twilight and not from a literature point of view. For example, Meyers took a real life Native American tribe and treated them highly unfairly in the books, to the point of calling them dogs which isn’t very fair at all, and they have received no compensation for being used and they are risk in the place they live in now. If you have some time and money, I would recommend checking out the Quileute Move to Higher Ground project.)
9. How you choose your titles: For story titles, I like to choose the main theme or a main phrase that is used. For chapter titles, I either don’t title or I will chose something that is a main part of the chapter.
10. Complete works: Out of the 21 works I have on AO3, 18 of them are completed, although one is an open ended and may be reopened after I get some of the larger works out of my way. As for fics in general that I haven’t published or have published on other platforms, there is 2 of 5 complete works on FF.NET. Some of those stories I will be pulling and deleting. The two complete works will be migrating to AO3.
11. Incomplete works: Actively: Sadril-nin/My Loyal One, A Hunter’s Circlet, and Beauty in Brokenness (unpublished for now). I have a few other inactive LOTR/The Hobbit based fics that I might try to finish after the main two are finished. Inactive: Literally too many to count. I mean, when I wrote my goodbye to the Twilight fandom, I said that I had been writing for the fandom for nearly nine years. I have so many unfinished Twilight fics, well over 100.
12. Do you outline: Not usually. I’m at the point with Sadril-nin right now where I’m literally following a map of Middle Earth and cataloguing the journey across the map, so I guess that could be considered an outline. Mostly if I’m writing for LOTR/The Hobbit, I want to follow the timeline of progression for the story that’s already been written. I do have a little bit of leeway in that gap between The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings though.
13. Coming soon ideas, maybe? I’ve been giving you a taste of Beauty in Brokenness. I do intend to publish it, but it’s a constant struggle to rework it. I have ideas that I want to cement in the story that don’t always come out the way I want them to, so I am consistently reworking parts of it all the time. I will also be rewriting (eventually) Crown of Thorns, which is Pirates of the Caribbean fanfic, Lord Beckett X Siren!OFC. I also appreciate the idea of Nestadion X Centaur Fem!Reader, but instead of being a centaur all the time, you’re actually a shifter who can turn into a centaur. Really confuses a warrior elf to see what amounts to a small human carrying this massive two handed sword around and calling him “princess” all the time.
14. Ask me anything: Is there anything you miss in fanfic? In comparison to the actual book/movie? Not really. I appreciate the original works, but I recognize that they can be flawed and so can their authors/writers. Which is why fanfic is so appealing-- everyone has a different spin on the original; everyone has a different take on the characters, everyone writes differently, and that’s the fascinating part to me. The only downside, of course with any fanfic, is the fandom and it can be hit or miss with people. It is what it is, and the liberty of fanfic is that not everyone is going to like or enjoy your works, and the same goes for your tastes. Are there right or wrong opinions? I don’t know; I’ve both read and written some morally ambiguous fics, and some I would like to forget that I very much haven’t.
15. Best writing traits: Same as the worst writing traits. I’m a sucker for detail. I love it. I want my readers to see it like I do. When I read books or play D&D or play video games, I see it like I’m in a movie. When I write, I want you to see it like you’re on set and the cameras are rolling and you are perfectly prepared. I want you to feel like you are in the story, which is why my oneshots turn into series, and my multi-chapter fics turn into novel length stories. I find it obnoxious at times, because I feel like I can’t ever turn it off, but by the feedback I get, some of y’all really enjoy it, so let’s get this show on the road.
16. Upcoming Story You Are Most Excited to Write: Uhhhh, let me go browse my WIP folder. I’ve put quite a bit of research into rewriting Crown of Thorns and making it slightly more historically accurate. I know that there will be a Part 2 to Sadril-nin, because I’m not going to time skip a seventy/eighty year gap between the timelines of The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings. And I really don’t want to submit y’all to this absolutely massive story all jam-packed into one fic. Other than that, I’m also sitting on Through Hellfire and High Waters, which is another Elrond X Reader fic that follows the premise of a modern/medieval world all smashed into one. The Queen of Eryn Galen also needs a proper ending and to be published, a Thranduil X OFC fic; this one will also have a Part 2.
17. Spicy Tangential Opinion: I don’t care if my writing makes the characters out of character. I try to tag that if I can, but let’s be real here. Either I’m writing a character that originally has a limited backstory and a very real chance at an open-ended future, or I didn’t like the canon character and I’m rejecting that reality and replacing it with my own. Does it mean that I don’t or am refusing to recognize character flaws? No, and that’s the beauty of fanfic. You can do whatever you want. You might get hate for it or you might not. For example, I am a fan of Severus Snape (RIP Alan Rickman). Does his character have flaws? Yes. Do I like the way he was canonically written? No. Are his actions justifiable? Hell no. Is that going to stop me from being a fan? Again, no. He is arguably one of the most disagreed upon character of that series. I don’t see a need to defend why I write him the way I do. I don’t see a need to defend him in discourse, and I’m certainly not going to be hateful about it. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion about it. Yes, there was probably some underlying intent when the character was written. I’m not here (unless you’re specifically asking my opinion on it) I’m not here to read in between the lines with characters like Snape. I do not care enough to lose friends over opinions like that.
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Interview given to The Severus Snape and Hermione Granger Shipping Fan Group.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/199718373383293/
Hello DeepShadows2 and welcome to Behind the Quill, I am pleased to have this chance to chat with you.
Many of our group’s members will know you as part of our Mod team but they might also know you as the author of Peculiar and of Good Night, Sweet Prince (written for our last Prompt Week of 2020!)
Okay, let’s jump right in. What's the story behind your pen name?
I grew up in the martial arts and my 'warrior name' was 'kage urufu' or Shadow Wolf. When I was in Creative Writing in high school, someone else was writing under that pen name, and they were more popular, and I was told I 'wasn't allowed to copy her name' by our teacher. So I went back and forth between some names and finally came up with DeepShadows. It is because during karate Kamp's ninja night games I would find the darkest spots in the camp and wait to sneak attack my enemies to steal their flags. The 2 comes from the fact that my first ever FF.net account got deleted because I put up lemons there instead of AFF.net.
Which Harry Potter character do you identify with the most?
Honestly, it is a mix between Severus, Draco, and Minerva. Each in their own way was in positions they would have rather not been in at one point in time, but made the best of those situations. Do you have a favourite genre to read? (not in fic, just in general) Strangely enough, I am really into my 70s Feminist Sci-Fi. Like Darkover and Tanith Lee's 'Don't Bite the Sun' Series. As for Fic, I am into many scenarios and it changes according to my mood. Recently I've been into fluff slice of life.
Do you have a favourite "classic" novel?
Oof. Asking me to pick solely one is a crime. I have always loved Gone with the Wind. If I had to point at one, it would have to be it. But I honestly went over 15 titles in my head trying to decide which one would be the winner.
At what age did you start writing?
I have been telling stories and writing them since I was young. I could read and write at age 4 because my grandmother wanted me to be ready for school. My first written story was at 5 ish and I still have my Crayola blue five-line story about a Unicorn named Pepper.
How did you get into writing fanfiction?
I got into fanfiction when I discovered that ff.net existed. My first fanfic is still up there under this pen name, but it is miles and leagues from my current quality. Spelling is still atrocious though.
What's the best theme you've ever come across in a fic? Is it a theme represented in your own works?
Honestly, hard to say. I love post-war fics. I love when the narrative is close to canon, but uniquely not, so it handles like it is an extension of the world and not a separate world.
Theme wise, I am a sucker for hard-hitting drama.
What fandoms are you involved in other than Harry Potter?
I was into Kingsman, but not as a fic writer, but a Tumblr role-player. It's been a while, so mostly now I'm just back to being a Potterhead. It's where I began and where I always come back to.
If you could make one change to canon, what would it be? Do you have a favourite piece of fanon?
Snape lives! You cannot tell me that a POTIONS MASTER who spends ALL DAY every day keeping students from POISONING themselves and who personally makes BLOOD REPLENISHERS for the infirmary would not have been prepared for an attack from Nagini. It is not secret knowledge that Drama King Voldy likes to have her do his dirty work and Severus would have been prepared for the off chance he was discovered and attacked. He lived.
My favourite piece of Fanon.... hmm... I like a lot of Fanon. It's hard to put my finger on just one piece that I enjoy.
Do you listen to music when you write or do you prefer quiet?
Music! Nearly all of Peculiar was written to Folklore by Taylor Swift.
What are your favourite fanfictions of all time?
Cake and a Cup of Tea by Cybelle Somewhere I belong by .... I can't remember Not Only a Granger by my friend Ferporcel
Are you a plotter or a pantser? How does that affect your writing process?
I am a Pantser. I have beats and thematic key points I know I want to hit, but the characters sort of fill out the story as I go. Sometimes I surprise myself with where I end up and I love that. Example: Draco/Krum was a total accident in Peculiar, but I love everything about it.
What is your writing genre of choice?
Hurt/Comfort and Drama/Angst
Which of your stories are you most proud of? Why?
Peculiar and Good Night, Sweet Prince.
Did it unfold as you imagined it or did you find the unexpected cropped up as you wrote? What did you learn from writing it?
Oh, my goodness, the unexpected cropped up. Peculiar was only supposed to be a 25 chapter post-war, post-divorce AU that turned into this beautiful beast. Characters were created as I went, and some side characters became major plot devices or turning points. I learned that sometimes my brain knows what it is doing before I know what it is doing. There were hints and notes of what was going on that I wasn't even aware.
How personal is the story to you, and do you think that made it harder or easier to write?
There are points that are special to me. It made it easier and harder to write. Having experience with some subjects Hermione goes through makes it easier to translate the emotions into words, but simultaneously, some of those factors are trauma-based and I had to navigate myself through.
What books or authors have influenced you? How do you think that shows in your writing?
I draw influence from everything I read. That is a key reason I don't read anything similar to my current work while writing because I don't want to accidentally lift from someone else.
Do people in your everyday life know you write fanfiction?
Two of my roommates are readers and I get people barging into my room after a post a chapter yelling 'OH MY GOD'. I also have a typed and printed review handed in person to me by my roommate that is on my inspiration board where she says 'Fuck you, but with love'. My entire friend group knows I write fanfiction and I get some of them to read it from time to time. My mom won't read peculiar until it is finished because she doesn't want to nag me for chapters.
How true for you is the notion of "writing for yourself"?
YES! I started Peculiar because I couldn't find what I was looking for. I wanted a high emotion, high stakes, drama and background rich fanfiction in which Hermione has completely broken and has given up on herself. Where she has nothing and no one and has lost that spark in her. I wanted Ron bashing where he is a villain and yet isn't the same time. I wanted Severus to be indifferent to her at first and slowly discover her suffering and set out to help her for the sake of the school, and it develops into more through feelings severed early on just after the war. I wanted her to have to overcome trauma and recover for herself, not for Severus, but instead with him and that they heal from their past together while facing continuous challenges that attempt to tear them apart. Along with other factors that haven't come to be yet, so I won't want to spoil.
How important is it for you to interact with your audience? How do you engage with them? Just at the point of publishing? Through social media?
I love my audience. It actually brought me here. Shout out to Geek and Tattoo for bringing me to this group’s Discord server. I answer every comment, I respond to any statements or comments I notice on social media. I'm an open person with my audience, which is why when I had to go on hiatus, I told them exactly what was going on.
What is the best advice you've received about writing?
Write what feels best. If you don't like what you are writing, no one else is going to. If you don't want to write a certain scene but you need it, write an article or a letter about it.
What do you do when you hit writer's block?
I cry. Then I put on the music that inspired the story/scene and I pace my room, going over the potential dialogue and basically acting out what I think should happen until it sounds right.
Has anything in real life trickled down into your writing?
Yes. Many of my OC characters are modelled after some of my real-life friends. And some other events have easily transitioned into events that Hermione and Severus have gone through.
Do you have any stories in the works? Can you give us a teaser?
I am currently writing the next chapter for Peculiar. I won't give a teaser, but I will say that Hermione and Severus give Rita Skeeter a delicious taste of revenge.
Any words of encouragement to other writers?
Don't stop, but also be kind to yourself. Not every writing session is going to be your best, but you won't have better days if you give up. Also, if someone doesn't like what you write, forget them, as long as you are happy with it, that is what matters.
Thanks so much for giving us your time.
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So I just finished reading all of How to Handle a Nico and I absolutely fucking loved it, do you have any NicoMaki fanfic recommendations of your own?
I must offer my apologies for the delay in response. I did not forget you, Anon, despite answering two questions that came in after this one. However, I wanted to wait until I knew I had a good amount of time I could dedicate to making a proper list of recommendations worthy of my time in the LL/NicoMaki fandom, which is typically sometime during my weekend.
Also, please bear in mind that this list is not all-inclusive. NicoMaki has one of, if not the most extensive list of fanworks out of the various LL ships. If someone reading this list is a fan of, or the author of a given work not included, please do not take it personally, this is merely a sampling of my favorites. There are genres and tags that I tend to avoid for various reasons, and there are many perfectly good works with the NicoMaki ship tag that I haven’t read simply because they are not the primary focus. And due to current events, as well as those of last year, there is a sizable backlog of NicoMaki focused fics that I hope to get around to reading sometime soon.
And as I expect this to get long, I will put the list itself under a cut.
First and foremost, I must shamelessly shill an author whose first forays into NicoMaki fanfic are based on HtHaN. It’s been almost a year since the first one went up and I remain in awe that I was able to pay forward the inspiration given to me by other authors. For this list I will only be including said works based on HtHaN, though VNVdarkangel has written some other NicoMakis I haven’t read yet. - Always there - Nico wakes up in the middle of the night. Some post-canon fluffy angst. - On tracks to the heart - Takes place during the scene transition in Homecoming. - Meet ‘n’ greet - Nico has a meet ‘n’ greet event and Maki shows up - Part-time idol composer - Nico hires Riko to compose some idol music for Egao. Minor YohaRiko to keep up the casual connections between HtHaN and HL. - Next steps... - A long, multi-chapter work that takes place after the numbered chapters of HtHaN. This work tells the story of NicoMaki as they take advantage of the research mentioned way back in Telling Mama. Yay science babies! - Out of focus - Maki can’t focus on anything but Nico - The door to dreams - Riko finds the piano from How to Celebrate a Maki and Maki finds Riko. More minor YohaRiko from HL. - Idol trainer - A non-NicoMaki, RinPana honorable mention tied to HtHaN
Next, I must link a few things from jstonedd, whose works I can point to as being among those that helped cement NicoMaki as a my favorite ship. - Buy Your Love - By the gods, I’ve honestly lost track of how many times I’ve reread this fic. It is also responsible for my headcanon that Tsubasa teaches Honoka how to skate, which I thusly include in Nico on Ice. - Soldier Wars - If memory serves, this work earns its M rating less for lewd stuff and more for action movie depictions of violence, like an R rated Charlie’s Angels or something. - After School Troublemakers - Earns its tag of Fluff and Crack. - Babies Maybe - More Fluff and Crack I only skimmed the first few chapters of Otonokizaka Private Academy and it didn’t seem very NicoMaki focused or really much my cup of tea. But I’ve heard others like it, and it was finally completed a few years back, so there’s that.
One author with whom I’ve interacted moreso than any other - maybe not VNVdarkangel as of late, but... - is the creator of one of my favorite Fantasy AUs, which is often a genre I don’t read much as it so often leans on Harry Potter, of which I’m quite unfamiliar. Of course I say I often avoid Fantasy AUs despite now writing two... Anyway, we have a few differing headcanons and I must say it’s fun to have a civil discussion about them - as opposed to others that become heated and dissolve into ad hominum attacks like the one marked by Comment Deleted tombstones in the comments of HtHaN. Anyway, that train of thought derailed, so here are some of lonelypond’s works. Worth mentioning that most works take place in the U.S. instead of Japan, something that confused me for a few chapters when I first started reading, but have come to enjoy it, especially when places are mentioned that I know. - Casual Lunacy - The aforementioned Fantasy AU as well as my introduction to this wonderful writer. Pulls in a quirky character from Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun, an adorable anime I’ve been meaning to finish. Maki is a werewolf. And I really need to reread this one at some point. - PhotoJazz - Maki is a photographer and Nico is an actress. - AU Yeah August - A collection of short 1 Shots. I haven’t read all of them, e.g. the Harry Potter one, but those I have were adorable, e.g. Summer Camp, Fake Dating and FWB. - Christmas Confections - A collection of amazing Christmas themed works that rank among my favorite gifts each year since I first started reading them. I’d link them each individually, but they’re all amazing so just read them all; you won’t be disappointed. Maki and Christmas just go together and lonelypond writes them well. - Can’t Get Started - To quote the summary “Nishikino Maki is trying to make it in the piranha fishbowl of movies, music and Hollywood. Yazawa Nico already has. And they keep crashing into each other.” Literally. It’s quite amusing. I’ve heard good things from other readers about the 1Kiss series but have only skimmed a few; they are high on my To Read list. The Idol House series came out during my troubled 2019, so it also remains on my To Read list. The Moonlight series seems to focus on NozoEli, which is fine, but for better or worse lowers it position on my To Read list. It’s lonelypond, so I do intend to read it eventually, but there are more NicoMaki focused fics that I’d like to get to first.
Next up is Lucia Hunter, a case where I must separate author from work. To this day I remain uncertain as to the details of the issues between this author and the denizens of Sukutomo, but the animosity exists nonetheless. Still, the listed works below were part of my gateway drugs into the wonderful world of NicoMaki fanfics. - The Diamond Princess’s Melancholy - How NicoMaki came together. - Love marginal - My favorite portrayal of KotoHonoUmi. NicoMaki is a side pairing here, and remain so through the rest of the works, but they’re still worth reading, imho. - Shiranai Love*Oshiete Love - RinPana focus but NicoMaki still plays their role. - Garden of Glass - de de deee de de deee Obviously NozoEli focused.
My first encounter with Rinforzando was a T rated cute and fluffy fic but they’ve done some pretty good NSFW works as well. - Ten Years - Always enjoy a good adult NicoMaki fic. - Limbo - NSFW FWB NicoMaki - Caprice - NSFW 2nd Person post-canon NicoMaki. I’m not typically a fan of 2nd Person perspective, but this one was worth it. - Cheers for Loving You - NicoMaki Secret Santa.
Hidekins is another author that has written a lot of NicoMaki I’ve enjoyed, but on a quick scan through the AO3 entries, few are jogging my memory with title and description alone. Perhaps I’ve read more here on tumblr? Perhaps I’ll come back and add more if I remember them better later. - NicoMakisses - A set of five cute short NicoMaki stories about kisses.
Saberin writes a lot of 3rd year stuff, and that’s fine, but the NicoMaki collection is worth checking out. - Prickly Love - As of writing this list, there are 10 chapters of cuteness
whoneedsapublisher writes a lot and I enjoy the style. Thus, when I see NicoMaki pop up on the account, I try to read. - Couples Therapy - One of my favorite Maki headcanons is included here. Not explicit but earns its M rating and thus is NSFW. - Subtle - Not particularly crazy about the Nico-taller-than-Maki, but that’s a minor complaint compared to the rest of this wonderful work. - At Least Six Confessions - Presequel to the above work. Poor Nico had her work cut out for her with a romantically dense Maki. - Keep Your Promises - Ten years later... - Happy New Year - Sometimes stalemates must be broken by someone. - Hidden Depth - Nico’s voice changes. And Maki likes it - Pretending to Pretend - Not explicit, but earns its M rating so NSFW. One of my favorite examples of the Fake Dating trope. - Merry Christmas Maki - I can’t think of a better present. - No Lies Allowed - Truth of Dare, NicoMaki style. - All Dressed Up - Based on a wonderful pic by noelclover - Santa’s Stand-in - Guess who still believes... - Switcheroo - Always love the idea of the girls trying to behave like the others. Makes me want to rewatch that episode. - Tick, Tock - Some introspective Maki - Insensitive - NicoMaki dating issues - Tomatoes - Maki’s favorite food I’ve heard good things about Dazzling Warrior Nightshade, so it’s on my To Read List, but I must admit I can be picky about my Magical Girls stuff. Madoka set an... interesting bar for the genre for me and in most cases I’d prefer to watch it as an anime or read it as a manga/doujin. Still, the idea of Nico being a magic girl amuses me greatly, thus why the fic remains on my radar.
And here are some other random works I’ve enjoyed over the years. - Smile, Nico Nico! - In which Nico drags Maki to the dentist - Billiards - NSFW 2nd Person. Yes, I know I just said I’m not typically a fan, but this one was also good. - Piano For Beginners - NSFW AU where Maki is assigned to teach Nico how to play the piano so as to be convincing for a film. - critical rules for not-dating - NSFW FWB AU that I need to finish reading someday but was happy enough with what I’ve read that I’d still recommend it. - 24 visits - Visits as in Nico the idol visiting Maki the doctor in the hospital. - 24 dates - A NSFW followup to 24 visits
So yeah, that’s a fairly decent list to get one started in their AO3 NicoMaki delving. As mentioned above, this is not all-inclusive and there are a ton of NicoMaki works out there. I haven’t visited FFN in years, so there may still be some authors that post there exclusively and have written some amazing stuff, but I cannot recommend what I haven’t read, or at least skimmed. I also have some tumblr works bookmarked... somewhere, so if I find them I might compare them to this list and maybe add those missed.
Here’s hoping something here piques your interest and makes you fall a little more for the wonderful NicoMaki.
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Okay, here we go.
Sugar Pine 7 is over.
I don’t really know what to say. I had stopped watching them for a while and when I finally came back, when I was finally interested in them again, they announced they were shutting down less than a month later.
It fucking sucks.
Sugar Pine 7 used to be my life. I started watching them just as they go their first office, back in May of 2017. As soon as I watched a video, I knew they were my favourite thing to ever happen and I immediately watched the rest of season 1 in chronological order. I was so invested that I would spend my days thinking about SP7 and playing alternate video ideas in my head. They were a group of entertainment that kept me going and helped me to develop my sense of humour. Whenever something went wrong and I just needed to turn off life for a while, I always went to straight to their videos. They were the one thing that seemed to always put a smile on my face no matter what.
They also got me back into tumblr. My previous tumblr account and fandom experiences hadn’t been great. The one before SP7 was full of toxic, judgemental, cliquey people and it felt as though if you didn’t have a group of online friends in it, then you didn’t really matter. It sucked and it scared me off of the app completely. When I made an SP7 tumblr though, I found a small group of people who were creative and open and welcoming and allowed me to be invested. I got involved. I made gifs, edits, theories and memes. I answered questions, posted a daily/weekly theory question for people to talk about and genuinely tried my best to make my blog and this fandom feel like a collaborative community. It was a lot of work, but that year and a bit of having my blog as place where people liked to come to talk and laugh was amazing and I don’t think I’ll ever get to experience something quite like that again.
I remember falling out of love with SP7, and feeling guilty for it. I wish I could like them just as much as I had in the beginning and I think the hardest part of it all was that unlike other fandoms where your personality changes and you grow out of them, it felt like SP7 grew out of me, and my personality still hadn’t changed enough to follow. It sucked and hurt and it was hard to come to terms with the boys doing things that I didn’t like or care for, and my dedication to this blog seemed to dwindle as well. I don’t think I ever really got over getting bored of SP7 to be honest, I’ve always kind of felt like I abandoned them. I can’t even watch their old videos without feeling a sense of nostalgia and shame, and I don’t really know why that is. I’m guessing it’s because part of me feels as though I let them down, and I’m not sure if I actually did.
And now they’re gone, and it feels like an ending which is just bitter with no sweet. I loved these boys. I really did. And I don’t think I’m going to ever be able to aptly put into words how much they meant to me and how grateful I am for every video they ever made. There wasn’t a day that went by that they didn’t make me laugh or cry right up until the end of my interest. I was already watching AH, but they were the extra push I needed to get into RT and because of that, I’ve made friends online that I love talking to and another community that I may not be as involved in, but enjoy nonetheless.
So, from the bottom of my heart, thank you boys for what you created and for what you achieved. It is something that you should always be proud of and that I will always be proud of on behalf of Sugar Pine 7. You really did good.
And finally, to all the gimps and cucks and dirty boys of the Sugar Pine 7 fandom who EVER liked, reblogged, commented, asked, submitted, followed, or even LOOKED at my posts and blogs at some point and went ‘hey, that’s pretty cool’ thank you. Thank you so so much. You’ve made my tumblr experience fantastic and have helped in creating a dying and now dead community something that I will always cherish and appreciate, even after SP7 is long forgotten. Your interactions made me laugh and smile and cry tears of joy and my heart swelled every time somebody said they appreciated this blog or me. Comments like that made my day, and they always will.
If you would ever like to talk to me about anything, please do. I would love to keep in touch with anybody from this fandom, even if haven’t talked before.
This post is too long and I’ve rambled too much so I’m gonna leave it here.
Thank you all for being good listeners, and may the members of SP7 always be the gay pirate, tall skinny cuck, water warrior, anubis worshipper, resented disney boy, FAJAM, tired helper, possible murder, and An-- what ever his name was -- of my dreams.
Thank you, Steve, Cib, James, Autumn, Parker, Jamie, Mimi, Jeremy, Andrew and everybody else who ever took part in those videos. I wish you the best.
#sugar pine 7#mine#steven suptic#sugar pine seven#sp7#sugarpine 7#cib#clayton james#parker coppins#james deangelis#autumn farrell#fajam#famous actor james allen mccune#james allen mccune#brb goona go cry#text#goodbye sp7#gotmyownposts
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Mobile Friendly About Lmao
22 | any pronouns other than it/its | lurking is the name of the game lmaoooo
Real DNI is no (no)maps/pears, nazis, TERFs/SWERFs, exclus, etc. Basic criteria yk. Prefer not being associated with open/untagged NSFW blogs because I don't want a dick or something popping up anyplace unexpectedly.
Hi, I'm Cross! I'm a nonbinary lesbian, I have (diagnosed) ADHD and probably some other shit that I need to see a doctor about. I'm in college and am generally very busy. Currently work a job where I am around people in close proximity so I am VERY team "Put your fucking mask on actually".
Blocking me bc I am an adult and you are not does not bother me, even if we've never interacted at all. Blocking me because I don't post things you like and Tumblr fucked up the tags does not bother me. I literally do not care if you block me. Please curate your social media experience I do not give a shit. However, this also means that I block liberally (usually just if I see something that's like SUPER uncomfortable but like eh). Please do not take it as an attack, it is not. Do note that if you post explicit shipfic or x-reader I will probably use the block button because I am not comfortable with x-rated fic or x-reader fic in general, much less about someone's minecraft rp oc.
This is my uhhhh minecraft related sideblog. Main is @ac-cell-erate but I post SUPER sporadically there bc not ONLY do my friends who do not want to see me talk about minecraft OR minecraft shit I've been watching follow me there, that blog has my Usual Branding for everywhere else online and I don't wanna clutter it. If you need me on some platform or other, handle is usually the same with different caps or characters based on site username formatting. I'm @crosspog on Twitter too but! I have no intent of using that account super much bc it was meant as a buffer between my normie life and the DSMP hyperfix I had up until a few months ago. I'll probably link a like? Disclaimer about how I feel abt DSMP at some point but the TL;DR of it is that I don't personally go there anymore and I don't really care to talk about it. This isn't a DNI this is a "don't be weirdchamp about this please, we can exist here without fighting".
Regardless, I just. Don't find Dream's content to be the kinda thing I like, and the bench trio dudes are my little sister's age so it feels weird getting invested in their content in the way I do with the Hermits, hope that clarifies things!
My prior fandom history is like. Warrior Cats (notably a fandom full of crit for the source and the authors) for the longest amount of time, so I am used to engaging SUPER critically with writing and actions from fans and creators, as well as trying to listen to marginalized people when they say that fanon or canon is doing something harmful (the cat books are not good.) which is a lot of why I think I ended up finding the DSMP fandom to be so like. Not fun.
That's it I think haha! Remember to like. Social distance, wear your mask, get vaccinated if you can. I guess.
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Well, it’s been a while.
A very long while. I am so very sorry to anyone who may have been worried about me and my well being. I’ve been having some mental issues lately, and for the sake of anonimity, I used another account (since some of my IRL friends are aware of this blog).
I also driftef away from Fairy Tail, and in fact developed quite a dislike to it on several aspects - I hope you can understand. The underdevelopment of characters started to really bother me, as well as the cheesy storytelling, and I eventually grew sick of it.
As of now, I’m mostly invested in League of Legends, Overwatch, Supernatural and BnHA.
However, regarding the Overwatch fandom, I would pick very carefully who to interact with. I do not want to come i touch with the fandom’s “SJWs” or anyone associated with them. It makes me sick to my stomach and generally very angry that people believe they have the right to police people’s thoughts, feelings and safe form of expressing those. (I’m not a big fan of Tumblr’s “social justice warriors”. And I’m putting this in quotes, because they’re not. They’re just toxic people with no life and I have no symapthy for them, honestly).
I’m pretty passionate about my opinions, so sorry for the strogly worded paragraph; but make no mistake, I am 100% serious about this.
The mere reason I created this blog in the first place was because of the toxiticy I’ve experienced on my other account, including death threats, suicide baiting and hurtful words for merely expressing my opinion. The reason I left was because I thought I was strong enough to go back and say it again, louder, defiant... and I was successful, for a while. And then one of these “SJWs” caused me a literal mental breakdown, leaving me in pieces after I was trying my best to stay calm and sympathetic with them, saying I deserved it.
I don’t trust these people. I never will. I decided it’s time to go back and try to interact with people, but this time, I guess I will have to keep my opinions to myself.
As for the blog, I’m not sure yet... I guess it’s gonna be the same ol’ art appreciation, just multi-fandom. We’ll see :)
Thank you so much to anyone who actually read the whole thing, I truly appreciate it! ♥
#lior blabbers#long post#and now im moody bc i remembered these ugly stuff#yikes#i really hate sjws....#they only cause harm#irl sjws are actually ok but tumblr ones are truly gross
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When Fandom Ain’t Fun: A Frank Talk by QPOC - WisCon 41 panel write-up
These get long so click the clicky to read.
Disclaimers:
I hand write these notes and am prone to missing things, skipping things, writing things down wrong, misreading my own handwriting, and making other mistakes. So this is by no means a full transcript.
Corrections, additions, and clarifications are most welcome. I’ve done my best to get people’s pronouns and other identifiers correct, but please do let me know if I’ve messed any up. Corrections and such can be made publicly or privately on any of the sites I’m sharing these write-ups on(tumblr and dreamwidth for full writings, facebook and twitter for links), and I will correct ASAP.
My policy is to identify panelists by the names written in the programming book since that’s what they’ve chosen to be publicly known as. If you’re one of the panelists and would prefer something else - let me know and I’ll change it right away.
For audience comments, I will only say general “audience member” kind of identifier unless the individual requests to be named.
Any personal notes or comments I make will be added in like this [I disagree because blah] - showing this was not part of the panel vs. something like “and then I spoke up and said blah” to show I actually added to the panel at the time.
When Fandom Ain’t Fun: A Frank Talk by QPOC
Moderator: Mark Oshiro. Panelists: ANerdCalledRage, Tanya D. (Katherine Cross listed, but unable to attend)
#WhenFandomAintFun - for the livetweets
Mark introduced himself by saying he was glad to be getting to do this with his friends who also yell about stuff on the internet (he’s Mark of Mark Reads, Mark Watches, etc.)
ANerdCalledRage asked to be identified by her twitter handle and not her real identity due to some issues that happened during livetweeting of a previous panel. I’m not entirely sure this meant for post-panel write-ups, but we’ll go with that to be on the safe side until/unless I hear otherwise.
Tanya introduced herself as someone who is active in talking about diversity in games (#INeedDiverseGames), and said that for some reason she’s still in the BioWare fandom online.
Mark holds up Tanya’s mug that read White Tears and said “it’s already full!” Tanya replied - “I’ve already been on a panel today.”
Tanya discussed how trying to talk about her own intersections as a black queer woman gets complaints about “harshing our glee” and “but why can’t I just...”
They all joke about being old, brown, tired and queer. (This is a theme repeated often throughout the panel)
Mark asked the panelists to talk about a time when fandom stopped being fun for them.
ANerdCalledRage replied with a time she and Mark were at a con and on a Firefly panel together - she’s a huge huge fan of Firefly while acknowledging it has issues. They were the only two poc on the panel. The moderator, a white man, made a lynching joke and a white woman on the panel continued on and made a second one. ANerdCalledRage was like “what are you doing - do you not see me right here?” She got a blank look in return - no one knew they’d done anything wrong.
While explaining why she’s not on tumblr, ANerdCalledRage remarked “oh I know - all the discourse - fuck your discourse!”
She talked some more about the Firefly panel above and said that at one point she made the remark that it’s dangerous to deify creators because they’re human and can make mistakes and people freaked out defending Joss Whedon.
Mark added that they’d even softballed any criticisms they had and still got such bad reactions in return. There’s this idea that cons are this happy fun space - but sometimes that happens at the expense of other people. Mark will rat people and cons out online for treating him badly, and has gained the reputation of “Mark the Con Killer”.
He talked about a time that a stranger on a panel called him a “fruitcake” (which he says he is fine with his friends saying to him btw), but it was so upsetting to him that he just shut down and stopped talking for the rest of the panel.
Mark brought this issue up to the con organizers and was told “well that’s just his sense of humor...” Mark was like “obviously - I do understand how jokes work, but still - “.
Tanya said that she gets this whenever she writes opinion pieces. One time she was discussing the racefail in Dragon Age and people responded telling her that she hates DA. Actually - she really loves the game series. She also gets told “you’re just making this about race.” She responded with “well yes, I’m brown. Every day. It affects me. Every day.”
Tanya was approached to write about a Switch game in which black women’s hair was used as a weapon. She had issues with this. Someone tracked down her personal account and told her she’s a horrendous person in reply. Then they said “have a nice day.”
She said she has stopped interacting with the Overwatch fandom due to pushback on intersectional issues. She talked about how she can’t just separate out her identities.
ANerdCalledRage added that no one can do that. We can’t just turn parts of ourselves off to create things or enjoy things - especially parts of ourselves that are forced upon us by our oppressors.
Mark brought up that qpoc are often pushed ashed even when they’re not talking about intersectionality.
Tanya replied with a story about some fanart that was created shortly after the release of images of a new character in a BioWare game. She was a dark woman, but the fan said they “improved” the image by giving her different lips, nose, hair, etc. Tanya said it was like being erased before she could even interact with this game. We can’t even exist in digital worlds! “You already have everything - can’t I just have this one character?”
ANerdCalledRage said she has mixed feeling about the character Bilquis on American Gods. She loved watching her swallowing a cishetwhiteman with her vagina, but she knows how the character ends up in the book.
She also talked about Thandie Newton’s character in The Chronicles of Riddick - a kind of Lady Macbeth character who has too much ambition, is too aggressive. She finally got to see herself in a role like that - but it was still very pigeonholed and the character is demonized.
ANerdCalledRage discussed the difficulty in watching a piece of herself being degraded just for being herself and fighting for what she believes in. Yet she was told by the fandom to just be Grateful for getting this representation. Saying things like that makes fandom less fun, and less inviting - isn’t that what fandom is supposed to be - sharing the things you love with others - don’t you want to share it??
Mark brought up the check boxes issue. As an example he brought up Supernatural (”I can’t believe I’m going to say something positive about this show...”) season 11 where there were queer hunters and one of the them was Latino - AND they got to live at the end. But people in the fandom were saying it was not believable to have someone who was both queer and Latino - it must be the writers just checking boxes.
Mark added that yes, sometimes white creators do this annoying thing of just checking boxes, but that’s not what he saw in this example. This idea that someone can’t be more than one thing is frustrating.
“I guess I don’t exist then - I’m just an astral projection of a bunch of social justice warriors online!” (big laughs)
Tanya’s response to people who don’t believe in diversity is - do you not go outside or read books or turn on the news that’s not FOX?
She gave an example from Watch Dogs 2 (btw, she very publicly hated the first one and told the game creators this on their own stage). But in the second one, there was a black nerdy guy and some people were saying it was not believable. This was set in San Francisco! It’s like people can’t imagine anything outside of their own tiny bubble.
ANerdCalledRage talked about how she and Tanya are both light skinned queer black women from Chicago, so at cons people often think they’re the same person. Tanya asked - have you been called Tanya yet this weekend? ANerdCalledRage replied - not to my face...
ANerdCalledRage said she had to leave the anime fandom - she was really into Dragon Ball Z. She also doesn’t go to Wizard World anymore. One time she saw a Dragon Ball Z T-shirt and squeed about it. The white dude vendor asked “oh you get that reference?” At first she was going to excitedly explain that she did, but then she realized he was asking in a patronizing way - not like a fellow fan would. Then he asked her how she would pay for it, in an even more condescending tone.
She also relayed a story from when she went to the anime club in college - everyone kind of stopped talking and looked at her when she entered the room and a white dude even asked her if she was lost. And when she is out with her friend who is Southeast Asian who is not into anime but ANerdCalledRage herself is wearing an anime T-shirt - people will stop to talk to them but direct the questions and convo to her friend.
ANerdCalledRage asked - how do I reconcile loving something that doesn’t love me?
Mark talked about the issue of people being mistaken for other people based on race. He often gets mistaken for Daniel Jose Older, for example. And, even though Mark is Latinx, he is often read as Middle Eastern and has been mistaken for Saladin Ahmed.
Mark added that these are often very well-meaning people with a good intent to compliment these authors, but it feels like a fuck you to him. These people aren’t bothering to notice their differences and who they really are.
Tanya replied that N. K. Jemisin has been mistaken for Octavia Butler - even after Butler died. She then talked about a panel last year where a bunch of black women switched their name tents around to have some fun with the problem.
Tanya talked about how in fiction, there’s often only one brown and/or queer character and then that character has to be model minority. Queer and poc characters are ignored, infantilized, erased, etc. One example of this is Kylo/Hux being shipped much more than Finn/Poe.
ANerdCalledRage brought up the new Ghostbusters movie (Tanya jokingly gets up to leave - this is apparently a conversation they’ve had many times before lol). ANerdCalledRage talked about Leslie Jones and Kate McKinnon’s treatments by the fans. She said she is not a fan of Jones’ character in the movie - she relies too much on negative tropes for black women. But she does respect Jones’ hustle.
ANerdCalledRage made the mistake of going online when Jones was being harassed - fans of the movie were not defending her but were giving McKinnon’s character so much support and praise just for being coded queer.
Leslie Jones got to play the first black woman Ghostbuster and no one was talking about that. So while ANerdCalledRage was excited to see girls watching this movie with femme action heroes, there were upsetting things going on too.
ANerdCalledRage was invited to be on a podcast talking about the movie - she was the only black person on the podcast. She felt like she couldn’t talk specifically about the issues affecting “me and mine.”
Tanya added that she was paid to write about the new Ghostbusters. She did not like the movie. The trailer only showed Jones’ character as having these negative stereotypes. She wrote her opinion piece about how they could have easily fixed this trope, and how it was the same stuff that Ernie Hudson’s character had in the original movies. She got so much flack for that piece.
Tanya also said she got really sick of all of the Holtzman praise and especially got mad at all the straight women saying things like “I’d go gay for Holtzman!”
Mark said he got a twitter question for the panelists about how they handle people wanting solidarity on one issue while ignoring the others - examples are Agent Carter and Supergirl.
ANerdCalledRage said she’s going to make enemies but “I hate Supergirl.” (Someone in the back cheered - much laughter) She said that the show was the blandest form of second wave feminism. She tried but couldn’t get through the pilot - even with multiple attempts. The J'onn J'onzz character was unapologetically showing a large black man scaring the shit out of a tiny blonde woman and she was wondering - do they even know what they’re doing with this trope? Fuck this show!
ANerdCalledRage added - to each their own - you can like the show. But don’t push me to watch it. I won’t ask you to stop watching it or liking it, but please consider my views and feelings.
Another example is Into the Badlands - there is an Asian American assassin character and a black woman doctor love interest. There was a great trope subversion there but ... they killed her off. It’s frustrating to have to justify opinions and feelings about this stuff.
Mark talked about the whole “just give it another try” thing that fandom does. His example is The 100. Wells Jaha was such a well developed black character - but just four episodes in they kill him to give a white girl feels for one episode.
People were recommending the show for the queer characters, but having that queer representation doesn’t justify the racist stuff. Wells’ own father stops talking about him for two whole seasons. Mark sees this as just bad writing. If they’re going to pull that kind of thing in episode four - they lose his trust.
Tanya said that the single issue thing was in effect for Agent Carter too. If your show failed because they forgot that brown people have money then...
(I have in my notes that some funny conversation ensued but wow I was getting tired at this point and cannot read my own handwriting. wooops.)
An audience member asked about the Black Panther movie and not representing the lesbian characters from the comics. ANerdCalledRage talked about being excited as hell for the movie, but also really scared. Marvel’s history with erasing black creators and lack of complex black characters, especially if they have more than one marginalization.
Another audience member asked the panelists if they had any examples of calling someone in fandom out and that person actually changing. Mostly blank looks at first as they try to recall something.
Tanya mentioned one time someone on tumblr told her not use the term poc - she engaged with them and gave them resources. A week later they came back and apologized. She figures they “fell into a discourse pool and drowned.”
She said she often gets comments on twitter from people saying “I never thought about that before...” and she replies with “because you never had to.” She said she’s not online to educate her white followers. If that happens, good, but sometimes when people thank her for doing that she wants to give them her paypal link.
Mark talked about how sometimes people will tweet creators his reviews. (He said don’t do that, btw, it’s creepy and weird) But one time this happened when he was talking about some transphobic stuff in Leverage and John Rogers (I think - notes unclear but I think that’s who he was talking about) got sent the review and actually thanked Mark for bringing it up. John Green has also thanked him for bringing up issues in his work.
And audience member asked - so there’s hope? Mark replied - don’t quote me on that! But ANerdCalledRage added - we wouldn’t be doing this if we didn’t have hope.
One audience member (who I believe was a white male) admitted they were going to tell a story - Mark said no we only have 2 minutes left but the audience member continued and said - okay I’ll be brief... Tanya stepped in and said - I’m not hearing a question, so the audience member finally realized what they were doing and stopped.
(I include this to kind of illustrate a point, I guess. Someone with privilege with good intent was over-stepping and it took them a bit to figure it out, but they did eventually realize and stop. Another example of people eventually getting it??)
ANerdCalledRage talked about her concerns with the CW picking up Black Lightning. This comic story is about an older black male superhero who chooses to stop and make his family a priority. He also has two daughters who begin to have powers. So there are Two Black Female characters who are coming into their power! Now, in the comics, one of them is a lesbian - will that happen on the show?
Mark brought up a fanfic where Cap punches Nick Spencer in the face - everyone cheered loudly, and that wrapped up the panel perfectly.
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Hello there and good day to you mun,
I previously knew you as Seven back over on deviantart, I hope that it is okay to refer to you as. We were in an OCT once a few years back, and I very much enjoyed your art and your characters. So you know, I decided to keep checking up on your account from time to time, and it eventually lead me to your many tumblr accounts.
When I was browsing your tumblr for the Crystals Angels blog, (at least I think it was this one) a few days ago I saw a post about how you had looked forward to/wanted to do a role-play thread where someone was doing a portrait of Fawniss as she is unable to see her “human” form (and doesn’t realize how beautiful she really is.) Lets be real, Fawniss is extremely beautiful <3).
I thought that it would a super cute idea for a picture, as Fawn kinda reminds me of a Rose Quarts type character. In terms of being a total lovey sweetie, but also super badass warrior mom. I took inspiration from the painting of her in Steven Universe.
Granted I have been unsure which of my characters would best interact with yours, as being a large part of the League fandom, which intimidates me as I don’t have any OC’s based in universe. Although I do enjoy and play the game myself haha. I figured if anything I might make myself up as a Yordle artist persona, as I main with Tristanna and have been working with Kled as of late. So pay no mind to the Yordle painting the picture of Fawn. Plus I just highly enjoy drawing other peoples characters.
I have also been sketching a piece with Alice and one of my OC’s (also circus performer based ) as I feel like they would get along well. Plus they both have a splash of color in their black hair.
So I hope the little bit of fan-art brightens your day, and that you have a good one!
*PS: Fawniss and Gabe are the best OTP. personally I like them more than the TruthxFawn, but to each their own. <3
Kendy
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU
It’s totes McGoats ok to call me Seven. I still introduce myself as such to everyone. THANK YOU SO MUCH OMG! I HAD NO IDEA?????????????? THIS IS THE GREATEST THING EVER???????????????
Though I play a lot of League, my characters aren’t actually native to that universe. They can settle in any world you desire as they are fandomless. BUT YOU AS A YORDLE IS SUPER CUTE AND I LOVE IT TO DEATH COME INTO MY ARMS AND LET ME SMOOCHAROO! And thank you so much for comparing her to Rose Quartz. I love her. I am very glad that I was able to portray Fawniss as both a warrior and a cinnamon roll. I was afraid she’d only be known as a squish. AAAAHHHHHHH THIS MAKES ME SO HAPPY!!! I AM SO HAPPY YOU LIKE THEM AND WENT SO FAR AS TO MAKE AN ART! AND EVEN MORE ARTS IN THE MAKING?????????????? I LOVE CHARACTERS INTERACTING I AM ALL IN FAVOR OF THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!
#others art#submission#fawniss#kendy#I LOVE YOU SO MUCH LEMME SMOOCH#*GRANDMA KISSES*#AND YOU LIKE FAWNIEL#HOLD ON WHILE I HAVE A CASUAL HEART ATTACK#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#I AM SOBBING IT'S SO GOOD#I LEGIT HAD TO HIDE IN MY BLANKET FOR A WHILE TO GET OVER THE FACT THAT YOU WROTE ALL THAT NICE STUFF#IT'S TOO MUCH FOR LIL OL ME#MY POOR KOKORO CAN'T TAKE IT#HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#THANK YOU SO MUCH#I'm sorry to everyone#I get very excited about things#and then I yell a lot and handflap and rant and repeat things that I like
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