#i don’t know how many times i have said this but i never expected this kind of engagement when i first started my blog back on sep 21🥹

[huskymaine]

Okay, this is long and since English is like my third language I am not sure if I can cover all my points, but here we go : 

from the video above genin children working adult’s job weird era of peace, no age limit

I don’t know how that video above shows genin children working adult’s job because in that video only adults who works and no matter how talented Boruto is, he can’t graduate from Academy yet before 12-13, unlike Itachi and Kakashi in the past.

so that video means nothing as it expected after so much loss people would switch to different way of life style when you can not maintain your shinobi lifestyle similar to japan after ww2 but yet we don’t know what kind of laws and regulation and age limits hokage placed on like they used to do in shinobi rank.

That video is a mere observation of current worldbuilding, to show that their world is changing post-war. The post explicitly shows the difference between new era and old era and how kids on new gen is infinitely safer than kids on Naruto’s era and Kakashi’s era, I don’t see how acknowledge that means that the video means nothing? We don’t need the franchise to bare their constitution or other complicated politics, Naruto and Boruto are after all shounen shows with kids as their demographic intended audience.

academy students don’t have to be a ninja its natural because most of the skilled fighting shinobi died there are no one to entrust like iruka did to naruto and feudal lords investing more on other sources as lack of old skilled shinobis in the village from recent novel naruto retsuden, but what about age limit for these courses, as we know ninjutsu can be dangerous, only chakra or ninshu are harmless

You seem to have assumption that age limit doesn’t exist on new era, then why Himawari hasn’t been a ranked shinobi on latest chapter even though she already unlocked Byakugan on The Day Naruto Became Hokage? In Itachi and Kakashi’s era Himawari would definitely be pressured to be shinobi. But in current era she doesn’t, nor her friends.

you said about academy student but what about some very skilled shinobi especially in adult age can they gave up being ninja suddenly or will be punished we don’t know, never showed deeply, in what term they can quit being a ninja, there can be exception, we know hokage has the ultimate authority, he can decline anyone’s request, so no fair or legal rights for them has shown and can they leave the village permanently?

In the video, many adults quit being shinobi and use their ninjutsu to be firefighter or mailman or even actor. “Punished” “term” “exception”, maybe they don’t show them because they don’t exist? Sasuke is currently away from village for a long time and the Hokage Naruto is fine with just seldom sporadic hawks message. Kakashi and Gai are were in the hot spring and Kakashi told the Hokage to not call him because he was resting. Even on Sarutobi’s era Tsunade can dip out for good and there’s no ‘punishment’, ‘term’, etc, only Jiraiya hunter her because Konoha was in crisis after Orochimaru’s invasion and he didn’t want to be Hokage.

former ninja can be mean who used to fight in war, as i said most ninja population died, no wars no mission no profit so they switch to different professions even in dark era many used to do non shinobi works, it’s not a big deal, i don’t understand why do they even need shinobi culture, it should have been banned creates police and especial military for inside use who will not be stationed in only konoha but in whole land of fire and border police and especial ninjutsu fighter to counter aliens, this is why all shinobi villages should turn into like hot spring village named yugakure

Wait, I don’t understand, what shinobi culture does they maintain? Ninjutsu are no longer used for killing. Chuunin exam is now just a friendly match between countries with more secure land and equipment (except from aliens). You want all villages to be hot spring?

ninjutsu usage is not the problem here because dark times they used to do so but it did not generate much profit for which they can not sustain shinobi lifestyle now that they are less shinobi and you hashirama cells like many miracles its easy for one person to use without many shinobi, what kind of law regarding it, can shinobi used for their personal trade or can they sell it to other village , did hokage give these people freedom operating freely is the main issue that needs to highlight not through other’s dialogue

The video shows people use ninjutsu freely now. There’s also ninjutsu scroll beam in Boruto movie for civilian. Those things are clearly under Hokage’s permission and while Naruto disapproved the use of ninjutsu scroll beam for tournament, especially in secret like Boruti, Katakure is not punished nor lost his job.

restrain in what manner or term, in what conduct, we have seen ryogi like rogue kekegenkai kid sent to prison who was victim yet shin clones go to orphanage but they try to kidnap sarada, weird contradiction for naruto’s term meaning there are no especial term and consideration for ‘restrain’ operation, no highlight

I thought that sentence is already clear enough. “Don’t KILL but RESTRAIN”. Whether they got prison or orphanage or even death sentence it can be discussed later but what is actively discouraged on Kakashi’s reign (as per Kakashi Retsuden) is ALL Shinobi’s instinct to kill their opponent on sight instead of attempting to keep their lives for further judgement.

naturally it would improve since after every war there will be economy boom similar to real life but what about small villages like amagakure or former shinobi like kawaki’s father, they said so many shinobi died yet they could not track down impoverished shinobi like kawaki’s father with the help of shinobi union

I believe in Boruto anime Amegakure refused Shinobi Union’s help because they still view Pain as their God and so they distrusted the Shinobi Union who saw Pain as terrorist leader. As for Kawaki’s father, if you think peaceful era means there’s ABSOLUTELY no poor person, boy I got a bad news for you. Especially since the said poor person refused to take decent job, drowned himself in alcohol, and prefer to use his son as punchbag instead of going to therapy (which exist in Kakashi’s reign). 

may not be mercenary but in recent boruto chapter konohamaru forcefully evicts civilians from luxurious house for eida’s accommodation, similar to mercenary work.

I admittedly only watch Boruto for Kakashi’s scene and after almost a year pass I forgot most of them but when I said “mercenaries” I mean their main job is murder. The definition of mercenary :

a private individual who fights for money or other payment in an armed conflict, rather than for political interests. They are also known as soldiers of fortune, hired guns, or mercs.

I... honestly don’t know how that connect with Konohamaru’s action which probably for the sake of civilian’s safety (cmiiw I really don’t know about this). He didn’t fight anyone, he didn’t kill anyone, he didn’t became mercenary, I mean the lethal one.

its peaceful when most of your shinobi population died that you can not sustain ninja village or lifestyle turn to alternatives yet wars would eventually happen as long as small villages not included in 5 kage summit or shinobi village stop being dependent on feudal lords mercy and budget, shikimaru shinden is reminder of that, why not become a normal village whose main objective should be using chakra only or some non fatal useful ninjutsu not any violent shinobi works

Because Boruto, like Naruto, is Shounen franchise. You can’t separate violence from Shounen. Next question.

Okay, for in-world perspective, like it or not after 4th Shinobi War Konoha has reputation as the strongest village, yet the one that still need and ask help from other village. That’s the reason why Union between Shinobi is still standing. They can’t completely turn into pacifist because they have reputation to uphold and balance of power in their hand. 

they care more about skyscrapers not about justice or laws or rights and freedom and needs and benefit of individuals and minority and vulnerable people of the village or orphans 

Minority and vulnerable people of village, which one? What freedom anyone had been deprived? As you can see, people are free to choose their jobs (unlike Kakashi himself who literally got mandated as ANBU then teacher). Hyuuga slavery are no longer exist. It’s practically a common dudebros’ joke that there’s no orphan in Boruto (Kawaki still had his father before he got sold and hidden, Mitsuki is Orochimaru’s weird child, Sumire had her parents). 

I don’t think I even mentioned skyscrapers in that meta?

or how past should be highlighted or dark side of WOF fire being informed and its collective and individual history in the academy, there is no use for ethics or justice as long as you are abide by the village, village is so good in hiding their contradiction, 

I don’t understand, who do you think will uphold ethic and justice if not the village who already change their way? Obito’s world of delusion? Madara the strongest warmonger? Sasuke the Supreme Leader? Village is just a place when many people from different clans gathered, united, and chose one person as their leader (the method of choosing may vary). How corrupt village will be depend of the leader, in which Danzo is already dead and the 2 old hag had no political power anymore.

modern day USA and China even after certain periods we know the dark history of usa and china but for konoha’s case no typical japanese mindset about their ww2 history yet narratives glorify it as side of light or heroic place with full of moral, bull shite writing

Now I understand that you are upset about Uchiha Massacre being non-public. I don’t like that either. But, ultimately the only people that had right to disclosure the truth are people from Uchiha clan a.k.a Itachi and Sasuke. We know that Itachi absolutely didn’t want that to happen. Sasuke is a Shadow Hokage, he can speak the truth if he wants to. Why Sasuke doesn’t want it? Perhaps because in the end he wanted to emulate Itachi. I mean, that’s the whole reason of VOTE2.

(As for why Itachi doesn’t want to disclosure the truth, I will just say that although Itachi chose the dumbest method and Danzo is absolutely disgusting to instigate it, I as a citizen of Indonesia, often dubbed as Real-Life Konoha, kinda understand why Itachi didn’t want his family to be remembered as people who staged a coup. I will give you an elaborate answer if you asked.)

Look, I am not saying that Kakashi’s reign (and then Naruto) is a perfect country, with absolutely no flaws. It’s impossible to create in our world and it’s double impossible to create in a Shounen world when conflict and problem must happen to create a story.

I just wanna appreciate some improvement that Kakashi made in his reign as Hokage because I am Kakashi fan.

This segment is often ignored but I like it so much because it shows a glimpse of how ninja society changed in the era of peace (Blank Period-Boruto era). So some changes that happens are :

- Academy students don’t have to be a ninja 

- They can give up or fail graduation exam and will not be mocked for it (unlike Naruto in the past)

- There’s mention of “Former Ninjas” meaning that probably many ninjas are capable to quit being shinobi in peaceful era, probably because of the decreasing demand for shinobi

- Ninjutsu are widely used on non-military routine tasks.

- It’s explained in the novel, but now there’s rule “don’t kill but restrain” in ninja world, so now it’s heavily forbidden for ninjas to kill each other. So now ninjas are not “mercenaries”, at least most of them.

- Now that shinobi’s QoL are improved rapidly, I hope that bunshin will not create employment issues.

It’s so different from old bloody grime that is Naruto era. Kakashi’s era is worse, Jiraiya’s era is much worse, Hashirama’s era is much much worse. Interesting that the dream started with Hashirama (and Madara)’s era, yet the improvement is not instantaneous, but needs many steps. Still, I hope that we will know more about how Konoha and ninja world in general developed from military state into Metropolis during Blank period but Naruto franchise is primary about shounen fighting so oh well.

Some info from novels, spoiler warning for Retsuden series

Keep reading

[dollarbils]

admit you want me | b.e.

billie eilish x fem!reader

context. billie, your roommate, starts a fight with you which soon gets heated.

warnings. violent language, harsh insults, physical violence, mean!billie, smut.

request masterlist

you’d both forgotten why you were fighting. something about billie’s lifestyle, particularly the many women you’ve woken up to using your towels, in your shared bathroom. but it had escalated into much more, insults hastily thrown left and right.

“oh my god, quit bitching.” the tips of her hands pushed your shoulders away from her, causing you to stumble back. disbelief plastered on your face, however, still choosing to ignore it.

“i’ll quit bitching, if you quit being such a god damn whore.” she went silent and you regretted it immediately, her temper wasn’t one to mess with and now that you had, it sparked an inkling of fear.

“what the fuck did you just call me.” she grabbed your shoulders but you quickly pushed her off you, fighting her physically instead of answering the question.

“fucking quit it!” she yelled before losing it and pushing you harshly against the wall, pinning your arms by your side with immense protest from your side.

“repeat what you said.” she said it as if she hadn’t heard you. no, she hadn’t fully believed she heard you.

“you heard me perfectly, billie.” her tongue poked her cheek as she chuckled.

“repeat it, i dare you.” she taunted, expecting your defeat. you’d never usually stood up to her this much, you’d always put up with her bullshit excuses in the past.

“i asked you to quit being a whore.” she nodded her head a couple times, taking in your words.

“i was hoping i’d misheard you.” her eyes tore past your facade, staring deep into your own.

“nope.” you’d mustered all the confidence you had left, knowing you’d break within the next minute. your hands were already numb from the force at which she had your wrists locked to the wall.

“i think you should take some time to reevaluate.” she suggested, moving dangerously close to your face.

“hm, i don’t think i need to.” she pushed her body against yours as you groaned, her lips brushing yours when she opened them to speak again.

“no? i mean it’s hypocritical really.” you raised your brow and she fake-pouted, mocking you.

“how the fuck is it hypocritical?” her clothed breasts were pushed up against yours, and you’d lingered on the thought for a second to long, but you kept up the strong face.

“don’t act like your not a little whore yourself.” she was teasing you purely for her amusement now, the fight long forgotten. her focus had moved to breaking you. cracking you open. ruining your perspective of your own innocence.

“i’m not going to entertain this for your pleasure, billie. fuck off.” she mocked your tone of voice and you rolled your eyes, she was so fucking childish.

“trust me i’ve got an entirely different view of what my pleasure is. teasing you barely makes top fifty.” she retorted, dismissing any hint of enjoyment in talking to you.

“top fifty? what an honor.” it was your turn to mock her, and she lifted your chin, her eye’s menacing as she looked at you.

“you’re such a fuckin’ brat.” she shook her head, reflecting on her words.

“it turns you on doesn’t it.” this time you’d truly caught her off guard, as her expression visibly shifted.

“what’s got you so brave today?” she deflected from the comment, neither affirming nor denying.

“maybe I’m just sick of your bullshit.” you brought the heated conversation back to the topic of your fight.

“my bullshit?” she seethed, daring you to voice what exactly her bullshit was.

“yes your fucking bullshit. your out here fucking different girls every night, which i wouldn’t have a problem with if you weren’t so goddamn loud, and if they had the common decency not to use my towels. i’m doing like twenty loads of laundry each week!” she had to stop herself from laughing at your outburst.

“this is all over some fuckin’ towels?” she raised her brow in disbelief.

“no! it’s the principle!” frustration coated your words, she didn’t get it.

“so all i’m getting from this is that you’re jealous.” she shrugged her shoulders and you couldn’t help rolling your eyes. she kept her tone calm and collected, while you were practically raging at her.

“wha- jealous? how the fuck did you come up with that nonsense?” she chuckled when you defended yourself.

“nonsense is a bit dramatic, babe.” she licked her teeth, the term of endearment catching you off guard.

“don’t call me that.” you huffed, she was no longer holding you against your will, and it had come to your attention. you weren’t fully sure why you were still stationed against the wall, giving her the space to tower over you.

“why not?” she teased, this was all a game to her.

“because it’s not going to be that easy to get into my pants.” she laughed softly again.

“and what makes you think that’s what i want?” she poked her cheek with her tongue, hypocritically staring at your lips.

“you’re not the best at hiding it.” she smiled though you thought she’d take offense to the comment.

“yeah? i think you like the attention though.” she bit her lip as she leaned in, closer to your face, testing the waters before she made any sort of commitment.

“mm, maybe.” you shrugged your shoulders playfully but she just kept staring down at you.

“so are you gonna admit it or not?” she tilted her head in question.

“admit what?” she shook her head slightly, as if to warn you not to play dumb.

“admit you want this,” she tightened her grasp on your waist, “admit you want me.”

“nope.” she bit her lip at your response, god it turned her on when you denied her.

“that’s a shame.” she grabbed your chin and her lips met yours, hot and fiery as she pushed you further into the wall. you kissed her back almost instantly, not welcoming her, but submitting to her as if you had no choice. your rationality had fled but you couldn’t care less, her lips too soft, too plump, too warm to think about anything else.

“damn.” she broke away, as breathless as you, her heart racing yours.

“yeah, uh. that was-” you were flustered, not knowing what to do with yourself or your words.

“js’ shut up.” she brought her lips to yours again, this time forcing herself into your mouth, tongues dancing as she backed you through the door and into her bedroom. she continued kissing you while she took control of your movements, only breaking away to push you onto the bed.

“billie.” you called as she unzipped her jeans, soon doing the same to yours.

“mhm? get used to saying’ that.” you rolled your eyes, continuing your previous sentence.

“how many girls have you fucked in this bed?” she raised an eyebrow, figuring out wether you were serious or not.

“why? jealous?” she didn’t answer the question.

“not by a long shot, just curious.”

“mhm. sure.” she ignored the question completely, forgetting about what you’d said.

“open up.” she gestured to your mouth, and soon her saliva met the back of your throat, as she stared at you, silently instructing you to swallow.

“look who’s bein’ a good girl all of a sudden. such a slut, taking everything i give you.” her words were contradictory, but you didn’t bother pointing it out, blaming it on her chaotic mind.

“nothin’ to say?” her strap dug into your thigh when she hovered above your face.

“fuck y-” she smirks as she breaks up your words with the tip of her strap gliding across your entrance.

“what was that?” your face shys away from her, eyes closing and turning your head to the side. she makes an effort to express her discontent with this, pulling your face by your cheeks, forcing you to look at her.

“bil.” your plea didn’t go unnoticed and she held your hips to stop you from squirming.

“what?” you pouted when she didn’t move from her position.

“billie.” she bit her lip, enjoying how filthy her name sounded when it came out of your lips like that.

“you can keep whining my name but it won’t tell me what you want.” she shrugged her shoulders, her lips tracing patterns against your neck as your breaths grew heavy.

“please, i need-” she sunk her strap into you slightly, stealing way your breath as your mouth fell open. god she wanted to take a picture, having you like this was so hot.

“hm? what do you need? admit it baby, come on.” you still didn’t reply, testing her patience.

“okay, i’ll help you out a bit yeah? do you want this? my strap?” she wished she was recording, having had no proof of you agreeing to her words when you nodded your head.

“yes, bil. please.” she would’ve teased you further, but she couldn’t resist pushing into you. losing herself in the process.

“i want you.” you’d said once your walls had adjusted to her size, clenching around it in attempt for friction.

“if only you could see yourself now, my whore.” she smirked down at you, gliding her strap in and out very subtly watching you fall apart.

“mm, billie.” you gave in, moaning her name openly now, watching her enjoy it more than she’d ever let on.

“mhm? what’s up baby?” her hands travelled around your breasts, warm against her skin.

“harder pl-please.” now she really wished she’d been recording.

“what was that?” she asked you to repeat yourself, fastening her hands on your hips as she continued diving into you.

“billie.” her movements quickened, sending you back against the pillow.

“i didn’t hear you, babe.” her grin was all you needed to see to know she definitely had heard you.

“harder please.” you whined again, for the last time you hoped.

“god, you’re sexy.” her teeth pulled her lip back as she watched you come undone on her strap, begging for release and then begging for more.

[7ouls]

im REAAAAALLY sorry for the likje longest wait ever but in the meanwhile i've wiorked on my oc too so i'll prob post abt it soon. sorry if this is short or bad but it took me a long time to get motivation to write this 😓

(this isnt proofread so if u see any mistakes dont mind them i’ll correct them tomorrow cause im too tired)

fem! reader btw

Daisuke never liked to rely too much on other people, he was always told how annoying he can be so that would make him even more of a weight than he already is.

Although he can’t complain when his girlfriend is the one who gets to take care of him. After what happened at the Tulpar you could see big changes in his attitude, he tried to smile at you but you can see that it’s not the same genuine lovely smile he used to give you in the past, when he was still on earth with you.

You were his girlfriend before he got the news from his parents about the internship and no matter how much you tried to convince him to not leave he still did, promising you that he’d come back for you. He wasn’t wrong, but this isn’t what you were expecting.

He had many scars around his body, barely able to move. He was put in a wheelchair for a few months, just until the scars have healed and he could get back in feet.

Daisuke’s parents found him a therapist, ignoring the boy’s wishes not to. Because after all he had you, you were the only one who he opened up with about what happened to all of them, about how guilty he felt for them. You were the one holding him in your arms after he cried on your shoulder for hours, you were the one changing his dirty bandages but most of all you were the one that loved him.

At nights like this you liked to wait until Daisuke was sleeping to leave him on your shared bed and go out your balcony to watch the sky filled with the city’s light, and when days were harder you took the hidden pack of cigarettes and light one up.

As you were watching the sky above your head you felt moving inside the house but didn’t think much of it, as it could be your pet just wandering around.

Your presumption turned out to be wrong as you heard your name be yelled from your bedroom, you quickly get inside to check on the voice and found your boyfriend on the floor. You run to him and slowly get him back on your bed. He pouts seeing your worried face checking for any damage.

“Are you okay? How did you get down there, most importantly why were you th-“ He stops you before you can bombard him with even more questions.

“I’m sorry Y/n, i just needed to drink something and when i saw that you weren’t here i tried to take it myself but i couldn’t...” You could see the disappointment in his eyes, you thought he might be feeling like a weight on your shoulders so you tried your best to comfort him.

“Daisuke look at me. You don’t have to apologise, it’s my fault. I should’ve been there for you but i wasn’t and i’m sorry about that. You shouldn’t force yourself to move too much, the doctors said that your body is still too fragile to sudden movements.” The boy looked at you, the mention of doctors saddened him.

“I’m so tired of these doctors, i sometimes wish you could be the one treating me instead. And the therapist girl always keeps trying to make me spill stuff, is it wrong that i don’t want to talk about it? She keeps asking about you a lot too, she might be thinking that you know more than her.”

“She wouldn’t be wrong, if it makes you feel any better i could try speaking with her.” He tiredly nodded at you and you both get back in bed, drifting off into sleep while holding him.

“Goodnight Y/n, i love you.”

IDK HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS. i weote it in 2 hours so maybe that why its so bad and yea im so tired idek what im saying

[unoislazy]

Sneak Peak?

(Arthur Morgan x reader)

Because it’s been so long since I’ve written I feel like I’ve lost my touch a bit. I’m gonna leave a snippet of something I’ve written so far and I would like to know how you guys feel about it!!

Context: Childhood friends to lovers

“I’m in a lot of trouble right now.” He said, nearly out of breath as he grabbed your hand desperately. You stared at him for a moment, trying to process what he was saying as you tried to string together a proper sentence.

“You’ll be alright, right? You always make it out okay.” You said optimistically. The boy in-front of you gave you a charming smile. He had just shown up on your doorstep, which was no different than normal but this time he was winded and bleeding… Your concern was evident through the farrowing of your eyebrows and the worry in your eyes, but you dared not voice them, not now.

“You know I do, but… I don’t think we can stay here for much longer.” He replied, looking back over his back as if he was being watched. You too looked over his back trying to see if you could make out any figures in the area behind him, but to you there was not a soul in sight.

“We?” You asked, taken aback. It was almost as if you had only then processed his words as you took your attention off the empty area of dirt and leaves behind the boy and turned to once again meet his striking blue eyes.

“Me and the gang, we got into some issues with the law and I only have a few hours before I have to go.” He explained. You knew this was going to happen eventually, but even so you still didn’t feel as if you prepared yourself well enough for this day to come.

“Before you leave… I want you to take this.” You quickly grabbed a letter that you had stored in your drawer, in preparation for this day. “I don’t want you to open it until you’re gone, okay?” To that, the boy nodded.

“I promise you I’ll come back to you.”

And with a swift kiss on the forehead, and longing goodbyes, he was gone. That was the last you had seen or heard of the boy named “Arthur Morgan” for quite some time.

Many years had passed at this point and whilst you had never forgotten that boy, you had a strong feeling he had forgotten about you. Or worse.

But it was no concern of yours now, you were grown now. There was no point in delving into the “what ifs” of your childish fantasy. You still lived in the same old house, living a quiet life. A boring yet decent one, you didn’t know why you stayed. You had everything you’d need to leave and lead a more eventful life.

However, deep down you knew why you stayed.

You stayed for him.

On the off chance that that boy would find his way back to you. That he would come back and keep the promise he made to you all those years ago. But the other side of you knew, that was never gonna happen.

Your internal argument continued until you heard a knock on your door.

You brushed off your hands from the residue left over from whatever task you had found yourself partaking in before turning to get the door. You didn’t often get visitors but when you did it was usually just one of your neighbors or a family friend coming to check up on you. So with that expectation in mind, you walked towards the door and grabbed the handle with confidence, twisting and yanking it open with ease while saying your greetings to who you thought would be,

“Mrs. Baker I told you last time, I don’t need any more b-”

You cut your sentence short as your eyes quickly landed upon, not the older woman you expected, but a younger man. He was quite tall and he looked to be about your age, and despite his rough appearance he stood on your porch as awkwardly as a school boy in the front of a class.

“Oh, I’m sorry I thought you were someone else, how can I help you?” You asked, deciding it was best to find out what this man was here for. Upon further inspection, you realized there was a strange nostalgic quality to his face. You couldn’t quite place it before but it felt as if you had seen this man once before.

“I.. uh…” The man started, before he quickly turned towards his satchel and began to dig through it. It didn’t take long for him to grab a thin envelope out and display it. It was clearly opened but a name was visible on the front. “Is there anyone here by this name?” He asked.

You curiously looked towards the envelope and noticed…

It was your name.

Your eyebrows scrunched as you looked from the envelope to the man holding it once again. Why would this man be asking for you…?

It was then you took a closer look at him, he was quite tan, his hair was a gorgeous brown and his eyes…

His eyes

“Arthur…?” You whispered. It couldn’t be.

“How do you know my…” The man before her looked at her with a puzzled look before it quickly clicked with him. How could he not recognize you? Sure it had been several years since he had been back but he prided himself on being able to memorize your features.

Unfortunately the memory betrays one no matter how hard they try to defy it.

[joonsmagicshop]

Faking It- Chapter Two

Summary: When you first met Namjoon you never expected he would ghost you for a month due to his own clumsiness. You also never expected him to walk into your café and ask you to be his fill in girlfriend at his cousins wedding.

Pairing: Namjoon/Reader.

Word Count: 5k

Rating: E for everyone

Tags: Again just backstory and stuff to get the plot going

Author Note: protective taetae has my heart

*message me if you want to be added to the taglist*

Masterlist for this fic

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You stood in shock as chaos ensued around you. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from Namjoon as he smiled sheepishly at you, the words he just said reverberating in your brain as you scrambled to make sense of them

“Y/N I kind of well. Will you come to a wedding with me in December? Like in three weeks. I kind of volunteered you by accident. I’m sorry!”

You were just about to open your mouth to say something, maybe ask him to repeat it when you heard your name being called from across the cafe and you looked to see Taehyung struggling to assist a swarm of people.

His brown eyes were wide and panicked and that look alone made you spring into action.

“Namjoon I’m sorry can we… figure this out later I have to… I’m at work.” You finished weakly as you shot him an apologetic look and raced behind the counter immediately snapping into action to help Taehyung as more people came into the cafe.

You had no time to even admire how beautiful it was outside as you kept your head down and kept taking orders and making drinks.

It took almost an hour for the line to clear out and almost every table in the cafe was full. When you finally did look up Namjoon was long gone and his table was cleared.

“Holy crap I don’t think I’ve ever seen that many people at once.” Jimin comments wiping his brow with his apron and sighing, leaning on the counter for a quick break.

“That was insane. Like truly insane. I feel like everyone ducked in here to get out of the snow, our line almost went to the door.” Taehyung commented fixing his headband which had slipped so far back it was no longer holding his hair in place.

The music suddenly stopped as a couple more people walked into the cafe and their eyes widened at how full it was.

“Shit playlist is over,” Taehyung noted as you scooted behind him and squeezed his arm.

“I got it.”

You made your way to the tiny office at the far end of the cafe right next to the cleaning closet and took out your small key ring unlocking the door.

Taehyung kept the office simple with a small desk, a computer, and some minimal decor. You had decided to keep the office cell phone in here as it was still close enough to connect to the Bluetooth speaker but far enough away where it wouldn’t accidentally get spilled on by steaming hot coffee.

You pressed the password and scrolled down to find some festive jazz music, pressing the play button and letting music flood the cafe again.

Festive music felt right when a random snowstorm decided to show up a month before Christmas.

You paused in the office and slunk down in Tae’s big comfy chair letting out a sigh.

You pulled out your phone as a distraction from all the thoughts racing through your brain and you saw you had a text message from an unknown number.

Namjoon.

You never ended up putting him in as a contact.

Namjoon: I know things got busy and it was awful timing to bring that up. You probably have so many questions so text me and maybe we can meet up. Please just let me explain.

The office door opens and Tae slips inside you immediately sit up in the chair and he shoots you a weary smile.

“Crazy afternoon right?” He comments as you start to stand up to let him take his desk chair back but he shakes his head and instead takes the small chair in the corner, scooting it closer to his desk.

“I’ve never seen so many people in here at once.” You say feeling your phone vibrate again.

Namjoon: Please let me explain I feel like an idiot for even bringing it up.

“You okay?” Taehyung asked as you pocket your phone again and tuck your loose strands behind your ear.

“Yeah, I’m all good Tae.��

He stares at you and you know he can see through your lie. He has known you too long for you to get things past him.

“What happened with Namjoon? Do I need to beat him up? I will.” Taehyung says as you crack a smile.

“It was fine. Nothing happened. He- he dropped his phone in a sewer grate before leaving for a business trip for a month. That’s why he disappeared.” You explain shifting your weight in the chair under Taehyung’s heavy gaze.

“So what happened?” He asked leaning forward and waiting for your answer.

“You don’t have to hurt him if that’s what you want to know. I took his number this time and made sure to text him to be sure it was right. We are going to try again from the top.” You say with a small smile on your face.

“Okay, but something else obviously happened because when I called you to help out you looked like a dear caught in the headlights. You never freeze up like that. What did he do?” Tae asks dropping his voice low

“He..well he wants to try again. We both do. Then he told me…well I mean he invited me to a wedding? Told me he volunteered me to go to a wedding with him. And then we got busy so I have no idea what that means.” You say fidgeting with your clothes.

“I’m sorry what? You aren’t going to a wedding with a stranger? And what do you mean volunteered?” He asks concern written all over his face.

“I have no idea. I haven’t had a chance to text him with the rush and all. I came in here to collect myself before figuring this out.” You explain.

“Y/N you can’t. He just got back in your good graces and he’s already asking you for a favor. A huge favor! I mean who does that?” Taehyung argues, brows furrowed as you stand up and take out your phone typing out a quick message to Namjoon before you send yourself into a spiral of overthinking.

You: I’m done work in four hours if you want to come back and explain. I have so many questions.

“I texted him and let him know if he wants to explain he can come after my shift we should probably get back out there or Jimin might burn the place down.” You tease as you walk around the desk and reach for the door however Taehyung stops you with a hand on your arm.

“Please don’t let this guy hurt you again Y/N.” He warns as you stop in your tracks and stare at him.

“He hurt you. I know you didn’t say anything but it was obvious, at least to me. How you kept obsessively checking your phone. How you kept staring at the door in hopes he would just appear. Please be careful that’s all I ask.” Taehyung tells you before releasing your arm.

“Thanks, Tae I will.” You promise as you hold out your pinkie.

Taehyung chuckles and loops his pinkie with yours.

Ritual as old as time, the sacred pinkie promise.

You giggle when you release pinkies and both leave the office hoping Jimin was okay to handle everything for a short while.

Namjoon showed up exactly at seven pm and when you saw him your breath caught in your throat. He looked the same as he did earlier in the day but this time his cheeks were tinged with pink from the cold air and snow stuck to his eyelashes.

While the snowstorm had died down, small flakes were still falling blanketing everything in a soft white and making the world look fresh and new from this morning’s dreary gray sky.

Taehyung was cleaning tables and he shot Namjoon a look when he walked by to meet you at the counter.

Jimin had left an hour ago and Jungkook offered to stay to help Taehyung close up but he was in the back researching new recipes.

“Hey,” Namjoon said as you gathered your things from behind the counter and hung your apron on your designated hook.

“Hi.” You said softly as Namjoon shot you a warm smile that despite your better judgment, had you grinning right back at him.

Taehyung’s warning was still playing in the back of your mind, it had been replaying over and over for the last couple of hours as you finished your work for the day.

Taehyung was just being protective and you promised yourself that you would keep your guard up around Namjoon until you knew him better but every time he smiled it seemed your guard would slip a little bit. He just had that effect on you.

“Ready to go? I thought I could take you somewhere and we could talk.” He asks as you walk around the counter and stand next to him, plopping your bag on a nearby table so you can zip up your coat.

“Where do you have in mind?” You ask as you fumble with your zipper trying not to zip up any of your hair as you took it down before Namjoon showed up.

“I was thinking of a cafe maybe a couple of blocks down from here.” He says shyly as you finally get your zipper working and you look up at him.

“Namjoon we are literally in a cafe right now.” You remind him gesturing around at the mostly empty tables.

“I know but I didn’t think it was right for me to have our first date at your workplace you know.” He answers smoothly causing you to blush.

“This is a date?” You quiz him as you shove your hat over your hair and loop your bag over your shoulders.

“I’m thinking this is a let’s talk and figure things out and we can decide if it is a date after.” He says with a smile as you wave to Taehyung and lead Namjoon out of the cafe and into the cold.

The air is crisp and it burns your lungs slightly as you follow Namjoon out onto the almost empty streets. Overhead fairy lights are twinkling and the snow is slowly dying down with occasional flakes falling. The sky is dark and littered with stars and everything feels so new and magical, or maybe it is the fact Namjoon reaches out to grab your gloved hand.

You smile up at him and after the short walk, you find yourself standing in front of a white building which is a very empty coffee house.

Namjoon politely holds the door open for you and shoots you a charming smile as you enter.

While Tae’s Teas goes for a clean aesthetic look this place takes on a more earthy look and you have to admit the place is beautiful. The walls are cream colored and fake and real plants are scattered everywhere. Everything is soft light wood, whites, browns, and greens and you can’t help but gasp as you notice the giant mural painted on the far wall.

It is a huge climbing ivy, starting at the bottom and expanding outwards to cover most of the wall. Tangled in its leaves are coffee cups and tea cups making the whole thing fit the vibe perfectly.

“Isn’t that piece cool? It’s a legend around here.” Namjoon explains as you continue to stare at it in awe. Whoever painted it seemed to know what they were doing as it looked to be perfect in every way.

“Jin, my friend that owns this place, said the kid came in one day and almost begged to paint that wall. Jin thought why the hell not? If it turns out to be crap he can paint over it. I was away but I heard the story.”

“The kid came in with a sketchbook and got Jin to approve of the idea, every day for two months he came in and worked on it. Hardly talked to anyone just put headphones in and did it. When it was over everyone was so impressed and the kid didn’t even want money. He just said every time he drove by the wall looked so bare and he wanted to make it into something beautiful. Jin of course paid him and then the kid disappeared. No one ever saw him again or even knew what happened to him. We only got a first name. Jungkook. I never met him, Jin met him a handful of times and Yoongi only met him once. Sometimes we wonder if we imagined him but if you look close near the blue teacup you can see his initials.” Namjoon explains pointing out the microscopic JK handwritten there.

“Jungkook?” You ask feeling completely thrown off, blinking up at Namjoon.

Like your Jungkook?

“Jin said that was his name? Wait? Do you know him?” Namjoon asks eyes wide and voice excited.

“Yeah, I work with him. I-I didn’t know he could paint like that holy crap.” You exclaim in awe as you continue to stare at the art truly captivated by it.

It did make sense though, Jungkook always worked on your signs inside and outside the shop as he had the best handwriting out of the four of you. He also liked to add little doodles to things because he said they made it look “more interesting.”

Something like this though, so big and grand it made you glow with pride as you could imagine Jungkook in his dark baggy clothes with his headphones in having the time of his life painting the wall.

“He is our head baker and truly amazing. He does all our signs because he is so good. I had no idea though he did something like that. It’s incredible.” You gush as a voice clears from the counter and you turn to see a man standing there with his arms folded.

You were sure he wasn’t here when you first arrived and you jumped when you saw him.

He was staring at you and Namjoon in annoyance and you knew why. You would hate to be standing there waiting to serve a customer only to have them gawk at the art and take up your time.

“Maybe we should order.” You whisper as Namjoon chuckles and leads you to the counter.

The counter is bigger than yours and you can see that the desert case is almost empty. Maybe they are closing soon and you both should go somewhere else. You didn’t want to make them stay open past close that was so unfair.

“Maybe we should go somewhere else, it looks like they are closing soon.” You whisper feeling small under the worker’s gaze.

“Nah it’s okay it’s just Yoongi. He is our resident grumpy grandpa but he’s as sweet as Suga. He helps out when he can. Jin hired all college and University kids but sometimes with exams, they can’t work as much so we step in and help.” He explains as Yoongi shoots Namjoon a glare.

“I’m not grumpy. Maybe if you didn’t stand and stare at the wall I could have already been home.” He grumbles which has you shrinking more under his gaze.

“This is Y/N Yoongi and she knows who painted that piece. She works with him.” Namjoon explains calmly letting Yoongi’s sass roll off his back as if it never happened.

“You do?” Yoongi asks eyebrows raised as he stares at you.

“Yeah, I work at Tae’s Teas and Jungkook is our head baker there. I had no idea he painted this though.” You admit.

“He is a very talented kid. I met him once. Very shy but talented.” Yoongi complements shooting you a small smile.

“Now what can I get you both.”

You both order Hot chocolate and muffins and Yoongi gets to work as Namjoon chats him up. You find out quickly that they both work together producing music but help out Jin at the cafe when they can. Turns out Jin owns a couple of restaurants and cafes in the city and is quite a popular name among food critics.

Yoongi slides you the food and drinks, swiftly takes his apron off, and gives Namjoon a hard stare.

“I’m trusting you to close the store Namjoon. I’m not covering for you with Jin if you lose the key. Y/N I hate to ask you this but can you make sure he doesn’t lose the key? If I had a dollar for every time he did, well I’d be a very rich man.” Yoongi grumbles.

“Yoongi it hasn’t been that many times,” Namjoon whines as you laugh.

“So he doesn’t just lose cell phones then?” You tease as Namjoon lets out a groan and Yoongi snickers.

“I like this one.” He says pointing to you before gathering his things and waving over his shoulder. He heads out the back door and soon enough you can hear an engine revving.

Namjoon rolls his eyes and leads you to a table near the window. Before he sits he takes his time making sure all doors are locked and the lights are dimmed. He also pulls all the blinds down explaining how he doesn’t want customers to think they are open.

“So wait are we allowed to be in here?” You ask as he finally shucks off his coat hangs it on the back of his chair and sits down.

You follow suit and Namjoon smiles at you.

“Technically I work here so yes. But if you are worried I did okay it with Jin just in case.” He explains as you wrap your hands around the mug and let it warm your bare hands.

The hot chocolate is creamy and rich and you giggle when the whipped cream sticks to your lips. It warms you from the inside out and you wonder if you begged enough Namjoon would tell you the secret to making it taste so good.

“So…” He starts as he slowly takes the top off the muffin and shoves some in his mouth.

“So.” You repeat as you run your hands down your thighs nervously.

“I picked a bad time to drop that whole wedding thing on you. I wanted to talk to you about it I just never expected you to get so many customers at once.” Namjoon admits shyly as you nod and bring your cup to your lips, taking a sip of your drink and giving him the space to talk.

“Okay so. While I was away for a month I did have a week off so I flew back here to visit my parents. They live an hour train ride from here and well… My mom wanted to remind me for the hundredth time that my cousin is getting married in three weeks. December 21st right before Christmas. Which I already knew because he asked to stand in the wedding ages ago” Namjoon starts.

He lets out a small sigh as his eyes roll up to the ceiling.

“Sungho and I grew up together. Because we are the same age we were more than just cousins, we were best friends. Sungho and I grew up almost the same until we got into high school. He was the popular kid, playing sports and dating the prettiest girls. Everything seemed to fall into his lap. Whereas I may be tall, but I sure as hell am not athletic. I was more of the nerdy smart kid. I spent my days completing homework and watching shows while he was out going to parties with girls.” Namjoon says.

“Anyway, this is when tension started to arise. We got compared… a lot. And I just could never compete with him you know. He was just…that guy. Was already riding a bike when I still had training wheels. Knew what it was like to kiss a girl when I still thought they had cooties.”

You chuckled imagining small Namjoon sticking out his tongue when his cousin talks about kissing.

“Then I started making music. I went to underground rap competitions when I was fourteen, that’s actually how I met Yoongi. He is a year older and took me under his wing. Eventually, I told my parents I didn’t want to go to business school I wanted to be a music producer, or maybe a musician myself. At first, they weren’t supportive at all but eventually, they came around. Only if I finished business school. My dad is a hardworking businessman who was hardly ever home because he was always working. I think my parent’s dream was for me to be like him. But I didn’t want that.” Namjoon explains pausing to take a sip of his drink.

“I finished business school for my parents then decided to go into the music thing full time. Yoongi and I were already scouted we were just waiting for….others. They wanted to make us into a band. The greatest band the world would see but after a year they couldn't find anyone that matched our vibe so Yoongi insisted we become music producers instead. This all happened in Korea because I studied abroad. Yoongi came with me and worked on producing music while I was in school. Anyway, they took us on and since everything is online we work from the office here so we both could be closer to our families.”

“No matter what I do I’ll never be Sungho and while I’ve accepted that I don’t think my parents have. When my mom brought up that I would be standing in the wedding she reminded me that my cousin is the same age as me and getting married, while I was always away in different countries making music and maybe I should settle down.” Namjoon chuckles shaking his head.

“She then brought up how I had been single for a while and I just couldn’t take it and told her I was seeing someone. I was so tired of the comparison of Sungho’s life to mine that I just…snapped. I know it is super embarrassing to make up a girlfriend at my age but I just couldn’t bear to see her disappointed face…again. I’m sorry this must seem so pathetic.” He mutters as you reach out to hold his hand.

His hands are large and soft and when you lace your fingers through his you can feel a spark down to your toes.

“I get it Namjoon. I get why you did it. It must have been frustrating to constantly be compared.” You sympathize as he nods.

“Well my mom started to ask me a billion questions so I told her…a little about you. The lies just kept coming and well my mom told me I better be bringing you to the wedding.” He finishes looking ashamed of himself.

“I tried every excuse in the book to get you out of it but my mom doesn’t tolerate liars and I know this so I don’t know why I lied in the first place. You don’t have to come honestly I don’t expect you to I just figured I should shoot my shot you know.” He says running his thumb along yours.

“So you lied to your mom and want me to go as a fake girlfriend to your cousin’s wedding?” You summarize hoping you got it right.

“I mean that makes it sound awful but you're right. Sungho and his soon-to-be wife are loaded. The wedding is up north in the mountains and they rented everyone cabins to stay in. My sister was supposed to come but she is six months pregnant and thought it better not to so it would be us and my parents sharing a cabin.” Namjoon explains taking another bite of his muffin.

“Is this a ploy to get rid of my body in the snow?” You ask honestly which has Namjoon bursting out in laughter.

“No! Definitely not! Though that does sound worse than using you as a fake girlfriend to keep my dignity intact.” He says in between laughter as you finish off your muffin and wrap your hands around your cup again.

“So this is real then?” You ask teasingly as Namjoon smiles and pulls out the invite from his coat pocket sliding it towards you.

The invite is simple enough, a beautiful black and white photo of the couple on the front, and on the back all the details are written in swooping calligraphy.

“How much time do I have to prepare?” You ask as Namjoon’s eyes widen.

“Three weeks…Wait? You are coming with me? For real?” He asks giddy as he begins to wiggle in his seat in excitement.

“I mean. As long as you promise to not be using this to dispose of my body in the snow I don’t see why not.” You say as Namjoon leaps from his chair and pulls you in for a hug.

Your laughter bounces off the walls of the empty cafe as Namjoon whoops and cheers pressing you in for a very tight hug.

“Wow okay so. I will pay for everything. The dress the shoes whatever you need. I’ll also pay for the gift for the couple and your train ticket. You just have to show up.” he babbles releasing you and sitting back down.

“Namjoon you don’t have to…” You start, sitting down again but he stops you.

“First you forgive me for being clumsy, next you agree to help me out. Honestly at this point I owe you my life.” He gushes.

“So I told my mom we have been dating for six months so we have to act like things are pretty serious with us. And I will fill you in on everything about my family so you don’t go in blind. Oh Y/N I’m so grateful for you this just saved me like you wouldn’t believe.” He says eyes wide in excitement and mouth drawn into a grin.

“So I have three weeks to learn all this?” You ask feeling suddenly nervous but Namjoon soothes you by using his pointer finger to trace the palm of your hand. He is so soft and gentle with you that it makes your heart leap into your throat and you feel giddiness spread throughout.

“Yes, but we are going to do it together. You may be my fake girlfriend but I’m also going to be your fake boyfriend. I’m going to be alongside you the entire time.” He says sincerely as his finger continues to trace and is now making its way up your wrist causing goosebumps to rise on your skin.

“Okay, but there is something we have to discuss.” You say as his finger stops moving and he looks up at you with widened eyes.

“What about….this?” You ask motioning between the both of you.

“I mean. We never went on a date or anything and now I’m expected to be your fake girlfriend. What about…whatever we started here.” You ask honestly as Namjoon’s eyebrows furrow as he thinks.

“Here’s what I think. We never got to figure out what this is between us and that is my fault. I say we put it on hold, at least until this whole mess is over then revisit it. I don’t want the lines to become blurred because we don’t know what is real and what is acting. I say we get to know each other up until the wedding as friends. Then we put on our best performance in front of my family and after we can see how we feel.” He confirms and you frown.

“I know.” He says taking in your reaction “This isn’t how I wanted to do this either but I think it’s our best shot so no one gets hurt.” He says taking both your hands in his.

“Yeah, I agree with you I just hate that the first time something romantic happens to me it has to be faked.” You sigh.

Namjoon’s eyes widen in surprise.

“Wait what?” He asks.

You blush.

“I mean I’ve had crushes on people but it never seemed to work out. I’ve kissed guys of course, I even dated a guy in University for five months but as far as romance goes, I haven’t had much.” You admit feeling awkward and not meeting his gaze.

“You coming up to me. I mean that’s not something that ever happens to me. The guy I dated in University… we were from the same friend group and it just kind of happened. That’s why when you ghosted me it hurt so much.” You say still not making eye contact with him and feeling embarrassed.

“Y/N Look at me please.” He whispers and you raise your head to meet his piercing gaze.

“I don’t think less of you because you haven’t experienced a lot of romance or you feel like you don’t have a lot of experience. I promise when this is over I will take you on a real date that won’t end up with us plotting a scheme to have you be my fake girlfriend.” He jokes as you crack a small smile.

“I was serious when I said I wanted to get to know you. And when this is all over we will do this properly.”

And you gasped when he held out his pinkie.

You looped your pinkie around his sealing the deal and smiled up at him. You could put your feelings on hold for a month. Sure you didn’t have experience being someone’s fake girlfriend but you were confident you could figure it out because there was just something about Namjoon. Maybe it was his kind smile, or the way his eyes crinkled when he laughed but something inside you wanted to get to know him, wanted to help him, and just like he said you didn’t want to ignore those signs.

“Okay so let’s get started let me tell you about my crazy family.” He teases with a smirk as you settle in for a long night

Taglist

@caught-in-the-afterglow

@hearteyes4hobi

@m00njinnie

@stayonmars

@marihoneywk

@mustbeaweasleyginger

@xmspurple7x

@taekritimin123

@lerasi

@dejaariana

@coffeedepressionsoup

@rpwprpwprpwprw

@callmenoona25

@borahaetelevision

[tbyfandoms]

Birthday Blues | Austin Butler x Reader

Pairing: austin butler x f!reader

Word Count: 3.9k

Summary: noticing her struggle with the loss and memory of her brother on his birthday, austin helps and comforts y/n with the celebration of his special day (requested)

Warnings: mentions of deceased siblings, descriptions of grief

Masterlist/Request Form | Ask/Tell/Request

A/N: it’s been so long since I’ve updated and I’m so sorry for that. I’ve missed writing so much and hope this is me getting back into my groove. I started this request ages ago but just now finished it. it’s felt so weird rounding out this fic about grief after hearing the news about liam (for any of my fellow directioners) and it’s just crazy to me how so many of the feelings and instances I wrote about in this fic have been a reality lately. I hope you’re all doing well whether you’ve been affected or not, and please remember to keep those you love close and to let them know how much you love them. to the anon who requested this, I hope this fic brings you comfort, thank you so much for requesting <3

Today’s the day. The day you’ve been anxiously awaiting for a while now. Every year it’s the same, it never seems to get easier for you no matter how hard you wish it would.

It’s your brother’s birthday, and it’s been a while since you’ve gotten to celebrate with him in person. He passed away and every year on his birthday you find yourself unable to function properly. Everyone tells you it gets better with time, but you’re still waiting for that to start kicking in.

There are some days where you find yourself so overcome with grief you can’t even find the right words to describe it, and there are other days where for a little while you almost forget he’s not here anymore. You yearn for those days, those days that feel like you’re floating and there’s nothing but calmness surrounding you.

You wish his birthday was one of those tranquil days.

As you move mechanically around the kitchen, doing your normal tasks as you would any other day, you find yourself trying not to fall apart.

Grief is a really funny thing. At times you believe your mourning period has passed and that that part of you that’s now missing has been patched and you’ll be able to handle this day on your own without any consolation. Other times you don’t even know how you’re able to stand up on your own and be expected to continue on. It’s like a balancing act, never knowing which way the scale is going to tip. Calm or devastated. Good or bad.

Pouring yourself something to drink, you think back on all the happy memories with your brother that you can. You know in your heart he wouldn’t want you to be sad today, or any day really. It’s just incredibly hard to not notice his absence, especially on his special day. It’s hard when you miss him so much and want nothing more than to celebrate with him instead of without.

Over the past few days you’ve tried not to focus too much on your brother’s birthday. You’ve kept busy and continued business as usual but you can’t deny the moments of sadness that crept in unannounced. You’ve talked to other family members about it and some of your friends too, a lot of them knowing what this day means to you and how hard it can be. You always keep up a brave face but it’s easier said than done on some days compared to others.

The sound of padded footsteps coming from your right breaks you out of your thoughts. When you turn your head you’re met with the soft smile on your boyfriend’s face. It’s impossible not to reciprocate it. You don’t know a soul on this Earth that’s ever been able to withstand a smile from Austin Butler.

“Hi, baby,” he says as he wraps his arms around you, his warmth and familiar scent immediately settling over you. Your body instantly relaxes against him, comfort beginning to course through your veins.

“Hi, Aus.” It comes out almost like a whisper and you curse yourself for already showing a sign of weakness. You promised yourself last night that you’d try to get through this day on your own, not wanting to distract Austin from any of his work or typical routine. Alas it’s not turning out how you hoped. That’s the thing about grief though, no matter how hard you try, you never do know when it’s going to come creeping back in.

Busying yourself with cleaning up, you ease yourself out of Austin’s grasp. For some reason you feel that if you stay that close to him, it won’t be long before your walls start crumbling down and you’ll both end up wrapped in devastation.

To be fair, you don’t even know if your boyfriend realizes what today is. You know you’ve mentioned it in passing, but with not wanting to make a big deal out of it you never really went into detail. You’ve talked to Austin about your brother before whether it be reminiscing about childhood memories or recalling an inside joke, but you always try to keep that devastation at bay.

The blonde hasn’t said anything about it recently and with his hectic schedule lately, you’re sure it hasn’t even crossed his mind. You’re not hurt by it, if anything you understand and appreciate it. It’s probably best if you handle today alone, in your own way.

A small frown adorns the corner of your lips and you make sure to turn your head so Austin doesn’t notice it. One thing about him is that he’s always able to pick up on your emotions and can tell when something’s wrong. Best plan of action is to just proceed as you normally would. You’re sure the actor has a million and one things to do today, so he should be out the door any minute now and you’ll be able to tackle the day however your head and heart deem fit.

“Are you hungry?” You say as chipper as you can while you start to open up a cabinet, ready to whip up anything your boyfriend would like. “I can make you your favorite or if you have to leave soon I can just make you something to take on the go.”

“No, I’m okay, thank you. I-I’m not working today.” You nearly bash your head into the cabinet door as you hear this. Your boyfriend was practically always working, especially now. So him saying this totally takes you by surprise.

“Why not?” You turn around and face Austin and just based off the look on his face you can tell he remembers what day it is. His eyes are so sincere and you nearly burst into tears because he hasn’t even said anything and yet you know exactly why he isn’t working. Why he most definitely told his manager and whoever else that today specifically was off limits for any meetings or shoots.

“I took the day off. I know I haven’t brought it up lately and you probably thought I forgot, but I know what today is, what it means and how important it is to you. I just wanted to be here with you and to let you know if you need me that I’ll be right here. I won’t let you deal with today on your own, sweetheart.” His tone is soft and he reaches out to caress your cheeks, wiping a tear you hadn’t even realized slipped out in the process.

“Austin I-,” you gulp, emotion rising fast in your throat as you look into his blue eyes and feel the empathy radiating off of him. “You didn’t have to do that. I know how busy you are and I know it must’ve taken a lot to have your day cleared. Really, it’s fine if you want to go to work. I-I can handle it, I’m fine-“

Your voice cracks and in that same moment you feel like part of your heart does as well.

Austin’s hands are tangled in your hair in an instant as he pulls you in close, holding your head against his shoulder as you begin to fall apart in his arms. There it is, one of those grief stricken moments you swore you wouldn’t allow to take over you today. So much for holding it together.

Clearly your boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind though, and for that you’ll be eternally grateful. You let yourself go, let your emotions go, as he whispers affirmations in your ear. Softly shushing you and assuring you that it’s ok to let it all out. It’s almost scary how easy it is for you to do this as well. To let yourself be vulnerable like this. But honestly? You wouldn’t have it any other way. If you’re going to fall apart in anyone’s arms, there’s no one better than Austin’s to do it in.

After a while of being wrapped up in the blonde’s arms and after your sobs begin to turn into soft hiccups, you feel collected enough to take a small step back and start to wipe away any remaining tears.

“I’m sorry, Aus,” you whisper, feeling a little bad for just falling apart like this. You know he doesn’t mind, he wouldn’t have taken the day off if he did, but even still.

“Hey, hey, hey, do not apologize. You have nothing to be sorry for.” Austin reaches out and swipes his thumbs underneath your eyes, collecting tears that haven’t yet fallen. “I’m here for you, and if that means being a human tissue for the day then I’m fine with that.”

A small laugh bubbles out of your throat and the sound makes Austin smile. He loves your laugh and he’d do anything to hear it, especially on a day like this.

“I hope you know how much I appreciate you. I know you’re no stranger to grief when losing a loved one, but I still appreciate you taking this in stride and just being there for me. This day it’s-it’s-,” your breath catches in your throat, but you clear it, not wanting your emotions to take over again. “It’s hard, but you certainly make it a lot less difficult to deal with and for that I’m grateful.”

“Of course, baby. I’m here for you, always. When you lose someone you love, it’s difficult enough to deal with, yet alone trying to deal with it on your own. I promise you I’ll always be here for you on this day and every other one you may need me for as long as you’ll have me.”

A small smile breaks out on your lips and you don’t know a better response than wrapping your arms around Austin and squeezing him with all the love and appreciation you can muster. You can’t even imagine a day without him. You’ll have him forever if you’re able to.

Once the two of you break apart you watch as Austin begins to say something, but then appears to hesitate. His eyes meet yours and you start to wonder what it is he wants to say to you.

“Now I don’t ever want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable, but over the past couple days I’ve been thinking about what we could do to celebrate your brother today. If you’re okay with it, I’d like to take you somewhere.” The blonde takes a breath and then reaches for your hand, squeezing once before continuing. “You trust me, right?”

You’ve never felt more sure of anything than you do right now in this moment when you say, “Yes, with my whole heart.”

Your boyfriend smiles and you feel your stomach flutter with both gratitude and anticipation for what he has planned. No matter where it is he ends up taking you, you know with one hundred percent certainty that he’s doing it because he loves you and cares for you in a way you never even thought possible. That fact alone is what carries you out of that kitchen and through the front door.

*****

When Austin pulls the car into the parking lot of the flower shop connected to the cemetery your brother is buried in, you feel your heart begin to swell.

On the drive over, you began to brainstorm ideas of where it is your boyfriend was taking you. There was a small part of you that hoped he wasn’t driving you to some restaurant or your family’s house to try and take your mind off today, but that he was taking you right to this very place. In your mind, there’s no better way to celebrate and remember your brother than celebrating with him as much as you’re physically able to.

Not a lot of people find comfort in visiting a grave in a cemetery, but it’s one of the only ways you’re able to feel some sort of closeness to your brother. He might not be visible to you, but there’s something about sitting there and just talking out loud to him that allows you to feel some semblance of peace.

“Now I know everyone feels differently when it comes to visiting graves and doing stuff like this. So if you’re at all uncomfortable being here, you just let me know and I’ll turn this car around, we’ll go right back home, and I’ll apologize for the rest of my life for ever crossing any boundaries with you.”

A breathy laughs escapes you and you shake your head as you reach out and hold Austin’s hand in yours. “No, this is perfect. I very much appreciate you even thinking of doing this. I haven’t been able to come out here in a while, especially not alone, so I’m grateful you brought me here and that you’re willing to be by my side during it.”

“You’re welcome, sweetheart,” he smiles.

Austin turns off the car and the two of you make your way inside, the smell of fresh flowers instantly hitting your nose and you breath in deeply, wanting to hold onto it. It’s crazy to think there could be something so beautiful and alive surrounded by a place so sorrowful and morbid. Somehow, you think there’s something poetic to be found in that.

Both you and Austin wander around the shop for a while, taking in all the gorgeous arrangements decorated specifically for different types of family members. You see plaques for parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and then finally siblings. It hurts your heart to know people lose their loved ones in a blink of an eye every day. No one is safe from the horrors and unfairness of the world, but you wish with everything you’ve got that they were.

You wish nearly every day that your brother had been.

As you walk further down the aisle, you find yourself getting stopped by a bouquet. It stands out from the others, it’s almost as if the colors and arrangement of it were calling out to you. One look at it and you know instantly it’s the one you’d like to get for your brother.

“Aus, this one’s perfect,” you say softly, stopping your boyfriend in his tracks. He looks over at it and smiles fondly. He thinks it’s perfect almost as much as you do.

Austin instantly grabs it and the two of you walk over to the checkout counter. You reach into your purse so you can grab your wallet, but the actor holds his hand out and shakes his head. “Let me, for his birthday.”

Tears immediately spring to your eyes at the sentiment and all you’re able to do in response is nod your head slightly and give Austin a wobbly smile. You don’t know why you’re so surprised over all of this. This is who Austin is, it’s who he always has been, and it’s who he always will be.

*****

The gravel road that winds every which way through the cemetery causes the car to shake just slightly as Austin follows your instructions to get to your brother’s grave. You’re not entirely convinced that’s the sole reason your stomach starts to knot though.

Even though it’s been a while since you’ve visited this place, the moment Austin pulled up to the gates it was like you were here just yesterday. The landmarks are all too familiar, the shapes of other people’s headstones, and the view of other grieving families scattered around bring everything back instantly.

As you look around and tell Austin to pull over to the right up ahead, you start to feel a little lightheaded. In your mind you can see the day you buried your brother so vividly. You can hear the sniffles of family and friends and feel the slight breeze in the air as he was lowered into the ground.

Even though you appreciate being able to still somewhat spend time with your brother here, it does make it all seem so much more real. When you don’t come and visit, sometimes you’re able to pretend that he’s still here, still alive. But the minute you see that headstone, you’re reminded that he’s not, and it gets harder to shake the sadness.

Austin puts the car in park and you both sit in silence for a moment. He watches you look out the window, knowing all too well the emotions running through you right now. He gives you a minute more before speaking up.

“Do you want me to wait in the car or is it okay to come with you?” His deep voice breaks you out of your thoughts and you blink several times before looking over at him.

“No, come with me, please? I-I want you there.” Austin nods his head and exits the car, coming over to the passenger side and helping you out of the car as you hold onto your brother’s bouquet.

Grass crunches under your shoes as you walk the few feet to your brother’s grave, and a soft gasp passes through your lips as you come face to face with the headstone that’s seared itself into your mind forever.

Kneeling down, you brush off the small bits of leaves and grass that’ve taken residence on the light gray stone. Your fingers trace over the letters imprinted within it and with each passing letter you feel your heart squeeze inside your chest.

It’s so unfair how life can change so drastically in an instant. You remember the last conversation you had with your brother and you wish you would’ve known that would be the last time you spoke to him. You would’ve said more, would’ve memorized more about his voice and the way he laughed. You would’ve held on to anything and everything you could if it meant keeping even one more tiny thing of him close to you.

Lifting up the bouquet in front of you, you make sure everything in it looks perfect before placing it by the headstone and then standing back up by your boyfriend. The flowers look beautiful and you hate that you can’t physically give them to your brother on his special day. You just hope he’s somewhere looking down at you and seeing how loved he still is. How he’ll always be celebrated.

Suddenly, you feel Austin softly place his hand on your lower back and begin to rub circles on it. This is something he often does when he can tell you’re sad or getting overwhelmed and just need some sort of comfort. It always helps calm you down and you appreciate Austin doing it in this moment.

Austin truly cares so much for you and it blows your mind every single day how lucky you are to have someone like him in your life. Everything from the grand gestures to the smallest little things he does for you, you find yourself being so grateful for it all. He’s such a wonderful guy and you smile thinking about how well he would’ve gotten along with your brother.

You know instantly your brother would’ve adored him. He’d definitely try to play the protective brother card and give off the impression he’d never approve, but in your heart you know Austin would’ve had him wrapped around his finger, much like how he has you. You could see them hanging out and watching sports together, talking about music and films, and overall finding such a genuine friendship within each other.

The thought brings a smile to your face and you let out a small laugh thinking about all the chaos they’d get up to together.

Austin notices and his own curious smile adorns his lips as he wonders what you could possibly be thinking about. “What’s goin’ on in that pretty little head of yours?”

“I know you never got to meet him,” you start, a small tear trailing down your cheek as you take your eyes off the headstone in front of you and look towards your boyfriend. “But he’d really like you.”

A small puff of air leaves Austin as he takes in your words. In an instant he has you wrapped in his arms and his lips pressed against your forehead. “Oh, baby. I wish with all my heart I could’ve met him.”

You nod your head silently against him, knowing with everything you’ve got that he genuinely means it.

“Thank you for bringing me here, Aus,” you whisper, your words a soft rumble against the blonde’s chest. “You have no idea how much this means to me. I appreciate it so much.”

“You don’t have to thank me, but you’re welcome. I’d do practically anything for you—especially this—and especially today.”

You know Austin’s unfortunately no stranger to grief. He knows the pain of losing a loved one just as much as you do and you think it’s so kind of him to do all of this with you when you know it probably puts him back in his own memories of loss. The thought alone makes you squeeze him a little harder and plant a soft kiss on his cheek. “I love you, Austin.”

“I love you too,” he smiles. “Y’know if you wanna do this every year for your brother’s birthday, we definitely can. If you want to, that is. I know it’ll never change the fact he’s no longer with us, but maybe celebrating him like this and coming to leave some flowers at his grave every year can help you feel a little bit closer to him in a way.”

“Yeah, I’d really love that. I think he would too.” You smile up at your boyfriend and take in his thoughtful proposition. You’d love to come visit your brother’s grave like this for his birthday every year. Like Austin said, it’ll never change the fact he’s not here with you anymore, but at least it gives you something to hold onto. It gives you something to keep your brother just a little bit closer to you, and you’d do anything to make that happen.

“It’s a deal then,” Austin says before leaning down and kissing you on the forehead. After pulling away he crouches down and plants himself on the grass. “C’mon, no more birthday blues. Let’s sit for a while. I’d love for you to tell me more about your brother.”

Your heart soars at his interest. Most people would want to flee this situation. Get as far away from a place like this and ignore the fact someone’s passed on completely. Not Austin. He faces it head first. He knows it’s hard, but he also knows it can be healing to do and it can mean a lot to someone too. He can tell by the look on your face he’s made the right call, and he’s grateful he’s able to be here for you in whatever way you need him.

“Well, where do I begin?” You wonder as you sit down next to the blonde. You rack your brain and try to decide on what story or fun fact you should share first. God knows you have an endless supply of them tucked away in your memory. Some funny, some sad, and some downright disturbing in the best way possible.

You glance over at Austin, settling on one and as you go to start sharing one of your favorite memories of your brother, you watch as your boyfriend completely tunes in to whatever it is you’re about to say. Nothing else seems to matter in this moment to him and that alone makes you want to wrap your arms around him and never let go.

Yeah, you think in your head, in a way speaking to your brother. You definitely would’ve liked him.

[seoulstorms]

PRAY FOR ME

Father Charlie Mayhew x reader

a/n: this might be a part one… I don’t know how to write for father charlie… dr. mayhew however 😏 anyways I’m mid writing for dr charlie so… ;) enjoy!

word count: 972

YOUR MOTHER had always taught you to seek God for all times of need. In the face of the devil’s temptation, sin, helplessness or anything that would stray one’s path from God. You’d go to mass every Sunday, following along with the words of the priest and often staying a little longer to pray. That was, until Father Mayhew became the new priest in your small town church.

He was immediately known for his looks and his young age, taking the attention of many young girls in your town. To their dismay, he was already devoted to someone, God. He was a man of the cloth, holy in his intentions and words, preaching the gospel as his life depended on it.

You and Sister Megan were acquaintances to say the least, knowing her as she’d hang around in town, seemingly lingering in all the places you wouldn’t expect a nun to be near. Her quick mind and sharp tongue had her helping a detective- detective Lois, that was, in the shocking murders that were snaking through the town. It’d shocked you to your core, such violent acts in near your home leading your mother to believe the devil was returning himself to earth. A ‘warning’ , she’d said, panicked and confused.

“It is a warning from God and a message from the devil. It is the manifestation of all that is wrong with the world mustered up into an act of pure sin.”

Your mother had advised you to spend more hours in the church, in God’s house, in the presence of holiness. So you took her advice and made your way to the church after school hours, unsure of what to do other than pray.

As you made your way into the church, you made the sign of the cross, smoothing out your skirt and sighing at the warmth of it. There was no one in the pews, excluding Father Mayhew, who sat silently near the front seemingly lost in thought. It was only when the soft click of your shoes caught his attention that he turned and smiled, standing and greeting you warmly.

“Ah, apologies I didn’t hear you come in. Your mother came by earlier to let me know to expect you here”

He spoke softly, his eyes darting over your body as he noted your damp clothes from the rain outside. You nodded and shrugged, a quiet giggle leaving your lips as you tucked a stray strand of hair behind your ear.

“Well yes, father, my mother told me I should come here instead of directly home as it’s closer and well, the days are getting shorter and much darker”

You avoided his gaze as you spoke, not wanting to bear the weight of it as his dark eyes almost bore into yours, however lacking of boredom, more filled with understanding and concern.

“Your mother is right in doing so, it’s not entirely safe for young girls to be walking home alone in darkness. Especially now with these.. acts of violence, consuming our town”

His words were smooth as he ghosted a hand by your lower back, guiding you to the front of the church to the altar. You were familiar with how it all worked, having been to mass every Sunday since you were young. You’d watched Father Mayhew deliver sermons weekly and gotten used to his powerful voice, almost caught in a daze as he spoke. You were no stranger to the allure of him to other women, but being a strict follower of God you never acted inappropriately, immediately asking God for forgiveness.

His voice was smooth as honey, his eyes dark and almost dangerous, his mannerisms pure and holy. This man was a sin in himself, ironically. A man claiming to be so devoted to God but he was just like any other man. He was no stranger to sin, he wasn’t always a priest. You noticed the way he spoke, his eyes betraying his words as his gaze lingered just a second too long on places forbidden to a priest.

“father-“ you turned to face him but he was quick to interrupt, correcting you

“no need, please, call me charlie”

You uttered a small ‘oh’ and nodded, turning back around and keeping your hands busy with the strap on your backpack, avoiding Charlie’s eyes. He ushered you to continue, sitting opposite you but still close.

“fa- I mean, charlie.. I feel as though I have strayed from God..”

Your voice was small as you picked at loose strings and crossed your legs at your ankles. Charlie nodded and leaned forward, placing a comforting hand on your knee and tilting his head.

“how so? I am sure God will forgive you, you are a good Catholic, no? I do see you attend mass every week, sometimes more than once per week”

His words were light as he smiled at you, leaning back and resting his hands crossed in his lap, focusing back on you as his lightheartedness seemed to have no uplifting effect on your mood.

“I feel as if I am doubting Him, Father.. I know He will protect me but in our town, such violent murders… I am very afraid, I must admit.”

“well, sweetheart, you can find comfort here, until your mother can drive you home. until then, why don’t you relax in my office hm?”

You nodded meekly and followed behind him, the soft click of your heels once again echoing in the church. You kept your head low and followed him to his office, your mind filling with questions and wonders that God would bring shame upon. So it brought shame to you, clearing your mind and cleansing your thoughts with thoughts of God. Perhaps it would be a very long few hours in Father Charlie’s company until your mother picked you up.

[intersex-cpunk-wolfdog]

in regard to your shapiro post: trans women don't gain privledge when they pass, they're still visibly a member of a gender minority. trans men when they pass are not. they therefore have a privledge which trans women do not, a privledge related to their maleness. a male privledge.

plus, in trans spaces where you don't need to pass to be seen as your gender (which exist both online and in person) being a man does change peoples perception of you positively. i've seen it, i know it's true.

Firstly: no, that is not male privilege. Male privilege is systemic. What you are describing is somebody seeing a person, assuming things about their identity that aren’t even true, and then proceeding to treat them more positively. If we apply that framework in other areas, then bi people would have straight privilege in m/f relationships, gay people would have straight privilege if they didn’t bring up their significant others, and many intersex people would have perisex privilege if they just didn’t talk about their variation.

Male privilege isn’t being asked what you want first by waiters. Male privilege is not having to worry as much about being drugged and raped (trans men have very high rates of SA and do worry about that), not having to worry about your parents deciding to marry you off at 16 (done by religious fundamentalists to trans men in order to ‘fix’ them), male privilege is having the vast majority of politicians and people in power advocating for your interests (where are all the trans male politicians passing laws that harm women?), male privilege is being able to leave relationships safely (trans men have the highest domestic violence rates out of all of us). Male privilege is never having to think about medical misogyny. Male privilege is not being expected to care for your siblings as a child or adult.

That’s the basic stuff, but I’m putting a lot more below the cut (it got really long, lol).

What about trans men who don’t pass? Why are you assuming all trans men pass? Also, what do you think about transfems who are boymoding? Because if your definition of “male privilege” is “benefits afforded to somebody by individuals who perceive them as cis men,” that would include boymoding transfems, intersex women and nonbinary people, and even some very GNC cis and perisex women.

Why do trans men get told they have privilege for having to hide parts of their identity lest their peers feel betrayed and lash out when everybody else is (correctly!) given sympathy and support? Do you understand how hard it would be to not be able to talk about a significant portion of your life history? What if they were in Girl Scouts? They couldn’t show their peers pictures from their childhood, or else they’d have to be very careful. They’d have to have a reason for why they never use urinals. Or why they might have tampons in their bag or need a place to throw them out in the men’s room. Why they need blood drawn so often, what that undershirt they always wear is. And they’d need to keep quiet while women said things like, “you wouldn’t know what it’s like to be afraid to walk home alone at night, you’re a man!” even if they very much did. They could never talk about things in their past that might have been extremely traumatic.

Point is, being closeted is not a walk in the park and it is certainly not a privilege. I’ve been a woman and had to hold back big portions of my life as a man because I didn’t want them to know I’m transfem. I’ve been a man and had to do the reverse so they don’t know I’m transmasc. There have been times in the trans community where I’ve had to pretend to be just transfem or just transmasc because I’m visibly trans and knew the space was hostile to intersex people?

Also, I’m not sure what spaces you’re in, but that last part is not personally something I’ve ever seen, experienced, or even seen transmascs talk about experiencing. In mine, and many others,’ experience, being seen as a man by trans and queer people comes with a loss of support, a weird sense of distaste demonstrated towards us, and a pressure to ‘at least’ be feminine. Do you listen to transmascs at all? Haven’t you ever seen them talking about how part of the reason they didn’t want to be trans men was because they were scared of losing the support from their queer and trans friends for being seen as “evil men?” Or read trans men talking about how lonely and isolating it felt to have those fears confirmed?

And it’s not even just transmascs that experience this! A lot of masc nonbinary people (specifically people who have traditionally male sex characteristics) complain that other trans people see them as men and that they often are not even allowed in spaces for “women and nonbinary people.” And I know transfems who have experienced this after telling people they were trans.

Like, I myself have experienced this from virtually every angle due to my complicated relationship with sex and gender.

Everybody who I’ve spoken to who has been anti-transandrophobia has seemed so clearly to be trying to force a cisfeminist framework on trans issues without even stopping to listen to the lived experiences of many trans men and mascs. I am lowkey considering just writing a masterpost about this topic to redirect people to every time they have such a classic misunderstanding of male privilege and/or transandrophobia.

[damagedfletching]

(sorry vent incoming you can ignore this if you want) i just feel so numb. like something was scooped out of me. i could’ve handled them breaking up but the way it was handled so poorly and lazily especially after the way the rest of the week has been. i’ve never had to drop a show because of bad writing before but right now i genuinely don’t think i can ever watch my biggest comfort show ever again. i hope you’re dealing with this okay. maybe we’ll all make it through this or something idk 💜

All the hugs to you Anon, I totally understand your feelings despite my own, and I hope with a bit of time you’re able to find some joy in the show again (see what I did there? 😅)

I dropped Supernatural at season 8 after the endless wheel of Dean dead-Sam dead and the way the fans treated in particular the female love interests and I’ve never regretted that decision. If that’s the way you go for 911 then I hope you find peace with it. That said, I have faith in the show considering how many expectations and boundaries I’ve seen it break over the years, but I’m coming from a mindset of I don’t care who they end up with as long as they’re happy. I’ve been a diehard for other ships that failed before so I do understand if that’s where you’re coming from too. I also feel a little bit that everyone is kind of numb after the catastrophe that real life was this week so this compounds those feelings too. But you’re absolutely valid for needing time to process and being hurt.

Hopefully I am right in my eternal optimism and everyone ends up happy and loved and you can come back to the show and find joy again. And I’m here to share the sunshine in the meantime-if Tommy ends up gone we’ve still got Lou, and dear goddess I am so happy this show introduced me to him. They won’t take that from us. Treat yourself gently and know you’re not alone.🖤🖤

[cosmicalily]

cosmic drabbles - 'lover's rock', han jisung x reader

author's note: hello my loves! it has been far too long since i showed up on here. to be honest, i've just had zero motivation and also i've been in the middle of exam season, which is absolutely hectic. i've also got this perfectionist complex where if a story isn't amazingly written or the best work i've done, i won't post it, which consequently means i have tons of drafts! but this one is one of my favourites, and whilst it's unedited and short, it holds a special place in my heart. enjoy x

listen to: 'lover's rock' by tv girl

“Who brings a whole ass guitar to a party?” you giggled, resting your head against the door to your room. The boy glanced over, unfazed, his eyes glossy. 

“Who the fuck ditches her own birthday party to go up and paint?” he quipped in response, gesturing at the mess of gouache and paper that littered your desk. You blinked in surprise, walking into your bedroom with your arms crossed. 

He offered you a small smile, patting the spot beside him on the carpet as if it was his bedroom. You sat down beside him, leaning into the side of your bed frame. The steel was cold and uncomfortable on your bare back, but it felt soothing. Everything felt so hot and stuffy downstairs, too many people sharing the same air. You’d wanted a break, but just hadn’t kept track of how long it had gone. It didn’t matter. The people downstairs didn’t seem to notice your lack of presence.

“I’m actually not sure why I ended up here,” Jisung admitted, looking around your bedroom. “Your bedroom, I mean. I came with Minho.”

“I know,” you replied. “You’re his best friend. Although you’re literally never at school. I didn’t expect to see you here.”

He nodded. “I don’t like it,” he said simply, and opened his mouth as if to further comment, but decided against it.

“Fair enough. Me neither,” you agreed. You took a sip from your can and handed it to him, and he smiled in thanks.

“So,” you looked down at his guitar. “You play, I’m assuming?”

“Fuck yeah I do, it’s pretty much all I do.”

“You must get a lot of time, considering you’re not at school.”

“Yup. Might as well use it.”

He rifled around in his pocket for a pick and began playing, a very soft tune. Slow, but intentional. You leaned your head against his shoulder, half out of tipsiness, half out of consciousness. He didn’t tense or move or stop playing. 

“Lover’s Rock,” you murmured, and his eyes shone in excitement.

He started to sing, very gently, and you joined him. His head rested on top of yours, the vibrations of his throat warm and fuzzy against your cheek.

Minho poked his head through the door, eyes squinted, then smiled. 

Neither of you noticed that he was there.

“Wait, I have ‘French Exit’ on vinyl,” you mumbled when Jisung finished, leaning over him to reach for your record player. Jisung looked up at you, eyes sparkling, and your cheeks flushed. You pulled your hand back from your vinyl collection and placed it on his shoulder, pressing your foreheads together.

“Now, how many men have you kissed?” Jisung whispered.

“Very few,” you giggled, playing along.

“But you offered me a kiss, why?” 

“Such a foolish reason, I’m afraid,” you sighed, shifting yourself onto his lap. “I just wanted to kiss you.”

He beamed, his smile heart-shaped, and you leaned in, pressing your lips against his, gently, softly.

[runningincircl3s]

Nothing Ever After

Noah Sebastian x Reader x Vinny Mauro

Chapter Fourteen

chapter warnings: tiny mention of implied smut?

team vinny we are so up for the next few chapters :) sorry for the delay on posting this one, the next chapter might also be a little late because I'm soo busy this next week and I haven't had a chance to even begin editing it but as soon as I can I will get working on it because it's my favourite chapter I've written for this story so far and i really can't wait to share it with you!! <3

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“You don’t have to hide it from me, y’know?” Noah says, his hair falling over his eyes, hand gently placed on your waist as he smiles down at you, “I know how you feel about him.”

“What?”

“Vinny. I’ve seen the way you look at him, it’s okay if you’re in love with him, that’s why I’ve told him to meet us here.”

“Huh?” You laugh, "I'm not in love-"

“Look, he’s on his way.” 

You look up and see Vinny walking towards the both of you, something looked different about him, but he was definitely still him. 

“So you finally made your decision.” Vin smiles, a sparkle was in his eye that you had never seen before.

“What decision?” You didn't understand what was going on.

“You agreed.” Said Noah, his thumb drawing circles on your hip. 

“To what?” You asked. 

“I wasn’t too sure at first when Noah suggested it, baby,” Vinny began, “But the more I thought about it, the more I realised I wanted it.” 

It finally clicked, and you understood why the both of them were here. A rush of excitement rushed through you, adreneline in your veins as you look between the two men in front of you. Your lips crashed into Vin’s as Noah’s found your neck, you’d had this thought many times before, but you never thought it would actually happen.

“God, I need you both,” you moan, feeling Vinny’s- or was it Noah’s hand cupping your breast, as the others' hand came down to your ass, “Please…”

“What do you think? Should we play nice?” Noah asked Vinny, who nodded his head. 

"I think she deserves it."

"Please..." You whimpered, feeling Noah's hot breath tickle your ear as he whispered,

"Get on your knees, princess. Vin's being too kind, I think you need to earn it."

You dropped to your knees in front of Vinny, palming him over his joggers, the ache between your thighs was becoming unbearable as you tugged Vin's boxers down.

“Y/n.” You heard Vin pant as you took him in your mouth, your tongue dancing over his tip before you take him down your throat, Noah's voice whispering praises as he plays with your hair, “y/n…”

“Y/n! Rise and shine!” Vinny shouted, waking you from your nap. 

“What the fuck, Vin!” You groaned, rubbing your eyes, “You just woke me up from the best dream I’ve had in years.”

“Oh yeah?” He smirked, “was I in it?”

“You wish.” You groaned, sitting up to stretch your arms, ignoring how your underwear felt slightly damp as you moved, making you feel rather uncomfortable. “What are you doing here anyway?” 

“I broke my charger and Jolly’s letting me borrow his. Which one’s his bunk?”

“The one on top of mine.” 

“Thanks.” He looks, and then freezes. He stands there in silence for a moment. You panicked internally, wondering if you were moaning his name in your sleep, “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, I guess.” You say, reaching around to see where you left your phone when you fell asleep to hide the redness of your cheeks.

“It’s going to sound insane.” 

“Of course, it’s coming from you.” You smirk.

“Y/n, I’m serious.” 

“Okay, sorry. Ask away.” You wondered what could be that serious. 

“It’s my parent’s 40th wedding anniversary this weekend and they’re having a party, they're renewing their vows...” 

“Okay…” You expected him to ask you for help to re-dye his hair or to find something to wear or-

“The thing is... My parents think I have a girlfriend, I’ve never told them I do or don’t, but they’re expecting me to bring someone. I, uh, wanted to ask you because,” you’d never seen Vinny look this nervous in the entire month that you’ve known him, “Well, I thought maybe you could bring your camera, I could tell them my ‘girlfriend’ is a photographer. I’ll make sure I tell them that we’ve broken up next week so they don’t keep asking about you or asking about our plans for the future or-”

"So you want me to be your imaginary girlfriend."

"No- Well, I mean it's not like, I mean you won't-"

“Vinny, it's okay,” you smile, “I’ll do it. I don’t know how I’ll explain it to the rest of the guys-”

“If any of them ask I’ll tell them you’re coming with me just as a photographer, I’ve already thought this through.” 

“Wow,” you chuckle, surprised he'd really thought about this, “You certainly have.” 

“So you’ll definitely come with me?” He asked, “I think my dad might be calling me later so I’ll let him know.”

“What kind of friend would I be if I said no,” you gave him an innocent smile, “Tell Mr Mauro I said hello.” 

“Oh, I was just coming to wake you up.” You hear Noah’s voice, “We’ve checked into our rooms, I’m so glad we’re here for the next few days, I have so much work to get done.” He sighed, reaching for his laptop that he left in his bunk.

“Vin’s just told me his parents are having an anniversary party this weekend and they’ve asked me to be their photographer, isn’t that right, Vin?” 

“Yeah," Vin scratches the back of his neck, "They’ve seen some of the pictures y/n's taken from the last few weeks and asked if she was free this weekend. It’s on Saturday night so we’ll stay there and come back on Sunday.” 

“Oh that’s great,” Noah smiled, rubbing your shoulder, and all of a sudden seeing Noah and Vin both stood over you, you got a flashback to your dream. “And there you were weeks ago worrying you wouldn’t get booked.” You smiled back at him, agreeing.

"Anyway that's all I had to say," Vin smiled, spotting Jolly's phone charger. You had to look away as he reached up to Jolly's bunk, his sweater raising and exposing the trail of hair below his belly button- "See you guys!"

"Bye Vin." You give him a little wave as he walked off.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Once you’ve checked into your room and searched through your suitcase you realised you didn’t really have anything to wear for this type of occasion. You had party outfits, casual outfits, but nothing you could imagine wearing for an anniversary party.

You sent a text to Angela asking if she was busy in the next couple of days and wanted to go shopping with you, you knew her schedule and knew she had nothing going on during your guys' break. It was currently Thursday, and the party was on Saturday night, meaning you and Vinny would have to leave in the morning or the night before to make it to his parent's town in time.

Whilst you were sat on your bed looking online for outfit inspiration, you heard a knock at your door. You throw your phone down on the bed and get up to see who was disturbing you.  

“Everything okay?” You ask, letting him in. 

“Yeah, I just wanted to see you.” He smiled, shutting the door behind himself.

“You see me pretty much everyday, Noah.” You laughed, sitting back down on your bed. 

“Yeah, but like you pointed out the other day, the only time we ever get to spend together alone is when you’re under me or pushed against a wall.” He chuckles, sitting with you, his back against the headboard. “I don’t remember the last time we had a proper conversation.”

“You warned me about how busy the tour life is, this just proves it, doesn't it?” You smiled, “I still can’t believe this past month has been real. I’ll never be able to repay Bryan or you guys for this.” 

“I can think of a few ways you can repay me.” Noah smirks, and you shake your head. 

“I thought you wanted to spend time with me without-”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry.” He held his hands up, thinking of a way to change the topic. “I don’t know if I ever asked you how you and Bryan met?”

“Through the photography club at school,” you explain, “I changed schools when I had just turned 14 and I had no friends, we had just moved to a new town, so at lunch I spent my time in the art classrooms and it just so happened they were starting a photography club in the class I’d go to. I wasn’t even that into photography or anything, but that's where I met Bryan. He was quite new to the school too and only had a handful of friends, so everyone who already had their friendship groups would sit together and because we didn’t have anyone we were just put together on a separate table. So over the weeks we finally started talking to each other, and realised we had a lot in common, then we just became best friends from there.” You smiled at the memory, wondering if Bryan still remembered it as clearly as you. 

“It’s weird to think if that never happened you wouldn’t be here right now.” He said, “So you didn’t even want to get into photography?”

“No,” you laughed, “I guess it just sort of happened.” 

“I’m glad it happened,” he smiled, “And I’m glad you’re here.”

As you looked into his eyes, you felt nothing but pure guilt. How could you not tell him about you and Vinny? You were sure he was feeling more for you than he’d let on, and you were about to go to a party with Vinny and pretend to be his girlfriend. 

“Noah, look... There’s something I need to tell you.”

*Buzz buzz*

“Shit sorry I really need to take this-” Noah reached for his phone, answering it and rushing to leave your room. 

You couldn’t say you didn’t try. 

You groaned as he left, reaching for your phone to see if Angela’s replied to your texts yet.

“Ooh what kind of party are you going to ;)”

“I’m not doing anything this afternoon, I could come and pick you up if you want x”

You thought for a moment before you replied to her. You knew whatever Noah’s call was about was probably important, but there’s been countless times where he’s prioritised other things over you. 

“I’m ready when you are x” You replied, leaving your phone on the bed as you went to find a hoodie and a pair of shoes, and then your door knocked again. 

“I’m so sorry that was one of the guys from our record label asking about-”

“Angela’s coming to pick me up in a minute so I’ve gotta go, sorry Noah.” You snapped, not even bothering to look at him as you walk out of your room, shutting the door behind you and beginning to walk away.

“Y/n? Have I done something?” Noah asked, shaking his head in confusion. You stop in your tracks, thinking before you open your mouth.

“Every time I get a chance to spend time with you, or try to talk to you about something serious, something always comes up. I know things like this are out of your control but it happens too often and it pisses me off.”

“Like when?”

“Like when we’re occupied in bed and you suddenly get a call and you leave me laying there to answer it, like when we make plans and you’ve just so happened to forget you had an interview to do, or when we’re out and you see someone you know and you forget I’m even there. I don’t feel seen with you, Noah.” 

“I’m not being funny, y/n, but we aren’t even together. To put it harshly, you always knew the band comes first, and if I remember right you just wanted casual sex, no actual relationship. So why does it bother you so much?”

Your jaw drops in disbelief at his words, he really went there.

“So I don’t mean anything to you?” Your heart was racing in your chest, you felt sick, angry and upset.

“I never fucking said that, did I?”

“You don’t need to say it, I know where I stand with you, Noah.” You argue, and other hotel guests slow down as they walk past, clearly trying to listen in on what’s happening. 

“Can we not do this here?” Noah hisses. 

“Good idea. I’ll see you later, Noah. I’m going out with Angela, because she cares about me, to buy a dress to wear to Vin’s family party because guess what, I bet on anything that he cares about me a whole lot more than you do.”

“You don’t know how I feel about you, y/n.” Noah says, the sound of defeat in his voice. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I’ll see you later, y/n!” He mocks, walking in the opposite direction to you. 

“Noah? What the fuck!” 

He didn’t answer, he didn’t even bother to look at you. 

You groaned, trying not to cry from the frustration, and made your way through the hotel to wait for Angela to pick you up. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“So… What’s the occasion? You never told me when I asked.” Angela asked as you both searched through racks of clothes. 

“Vinny invited me to his parent’s anniversary party.”

“Oh… So not anything slutty, okay…” She giggled. 

“But get this, he told me that his parents think he has a girlfriend, he’s never told him that does or doesn’t, so he wants me to pretend to be his girlfriend for the night.”

“Well that’s a Vinny lie if I’ve ever heard one.”

“What?”

“He totally just said that to get you to go with him so he can show you off. He’s really close with his family, there’s no way they would think he’s dating someone if he hasn’t said he is.”

“Well we’ll see about that then,” you smirk, “But what if I do want to pretend to be his girlfriend for the night, that would definitely piss Noah off.”

“Oh... What’s he done now?” Angela stops looking and turns to you, her hand on her hip. 

“Nothing, yet everything, he’s just really annoyed me." You sigh, "He turns up to my room to spend time with me but then he gets a call and he runs out, it’s not like I don’t know his business, surely he should be able to take work calls around me.”

“It sounds like he doesn’t trust you…” She frowned.

“Exactly!” 

“Oh my god y/n look!” She pulls out a gorgeous red dress, making you gasp, “Try it on! Try it on!” You claps, handing it over to you.

“I don’t know if red’s my colour…” 

“That's even more of a reason for you to try it on and see if it is!” She smirks, “...But I do know it’s Vin’s favourite colour.”

You give her a look, before taking it and heading to the changing rooms to try it on. 

“I think it’s a little tight…” You say as you walk out, and Angela’s jaw drops as you do a little twirl, “What do you think?” 

“I think you're the most gorgeous girl ever!" She grins, "And I think Vinny's going to ask you to be his girlfriend for real when he sees this.” She suddenly gasps, giving you a serious look as she hands you your phone back. “Send a picture to Noah.” 

“Why? He thinks I’m only going as a photographer.”

“What?”

“Vin came up with the plan to tell the guys I was only invited because his parents wanted a photographer, I thought it was a pretty good lie.”

“Vinny came up with that one didn’t he,” she laughed, “I guess they’ll believe it though.”

“Noah did.” You check yourself out in the mirror, and eventually pull your phone out from your bag and take a couple pictures in the mirror. You’d think about whether it was a good idea to send them or not as you shopped for a new pair of shoes. 

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

“It’s actually pretty fortunate for you that there aren’t any shows this week,” you say as Vinny drives, “Did you plan the tour around this?”

“Kinda,” he says, looking over his shoulder as he turns onto his road, you wish you knew how he even made driving look so hot, “It's the longest tour we've done and knew we needed a break each month so we don’t all completely burn out, and it just so happened this weekend was during that break.” 

Vinny thought it would be a good idea to hire a car from the city the guys were staying in for their break from tour to drive back to his house so the two of you could stay there for the night before taking his car and driving down to his parents town tomorrow.

“I don’t think my roommate’s here at the moment.” He says as he pulls up, parking the car in his driveway. 

“Not that it matters,” you chuckle, checking your phone. You had sent the pictures to Noah yesterday, but you hadn’t heard from him since, he hadn’t even seen the messages. “What time have we got to leave tomorrow?”

“Probably around 12.” He says, getting out of the car and unlocking the door. 

You smiled as you walked into his house, it was just how you’d pictured it. Framed awards on the walls and tour posters, a massive tv on the wall and a bong that he made sure to clarify was his roomate's. You turn around to see him bringing both yours and his suitcase in from the car, rather surprised by his strength as you see him carry them both up the steps to his porch with ease. 

“Your house is so cute.” You smile, and by his reaction, he seemed rather offended. 

“Cute?” He raised his eyebrows, as if to say 'seriously?' “Y/n I’m a guy…I live here with a guy… Our house is not cute!” 

“Then how would you describe it?” You chuckle as he shuts the door behind him. 

“I don’t know… Manly? Homely?"

You rolled your eyes, watching Vin put the keys away before he insisted on giving you a house tour, showing you around room by room.

“And this is where the magic happens!” He opens the door to the basement, putting his arm out as if to say ‘ladies first!’

“Do you know how creepy that sounds?” You laugh, slowly descending the staircase to his basement. 

“This is where my drums are, I do my drum streams down here-”

“Can you give me a private show?” You gasped, but to your disappointment Vinny laughed and shook his head. 

“I’ve been playing basically every other night for the last month! Surely you’ve heard enough.”

“Please?” You plead, watching as he tries to hide the smile on his face.

“Maybe later.” He gives in, walking you back up the stairs to his kitchen after showing you around the room. 

“Can I request a song?”

“Depends,” he says, shutting the basement door, “Do I know it?”

“How am I supposed to know what you know, or don’t?” 

“What is it?” He asked, reaching into his fridge, pulling out a sprite. “Want a drink?”

“Yes please,” you smiled, “I heard you played ‘somebody told me’ the night I wasn’t feeling well and stayed on the bus and you haven't played it again after…”

“So you want me to play it for you?” He asked, handing you a drink. 

“Please? I’m coming to your parents’ anniversary party as your fake girlfriend, don’t you think you owe me something?”

“You’ve got a point there,” he acknowledges, “I need to shower first and pack for the weekend, but then I’ll do it.”

“Yay!” You grinned, “Can I take a shower after you?”

“Of course.” He smiled softly, “Also if you want my bed tonight I’ll sleep on the couch. I changed the sheets before I left for tour so they’re fresh-”

“I can’t kick you out of your own bedroom…” You frowned, “I’ll have the couch. I don’t care!”

“I will not let you sleep on my couch.” He chuckled, and a thought crossed your mind. 

“If we were okay to share a bed the first night we met then I’m sure we’ll be okay again tonight, right?”

“If you're comfortable with that then we can.” He smiled, “I’m gonna go get in the shower, then it’ll be all yours. But in the meantime make yourself at home.”

“Thank you.” You said, watching as he left, walking up the stairs. 

You made your way to his living room, getting comfy on the couch and scrolling through your phone. You tried not to think about Noah, but you couldn't help but wish he'd text you back. Whilst Vin was in the shower you considered calling him, but you didn't want to come across clingy. Maybe he just needed to calm down.

"I left my fucking shampoo in my bag." You heard Vinny laugh as he ran down the stairs, a white towel wrapped around his hips as he threw his suitcase onto the sofa beside you and searched through it.

You took a deep breath to calm your mind as you tried to be respectful, but you couldn't help but look at him. His wet curls, his bare chest, the bracelet on his wrist, the veins on his arms... You blinked, trying to concentrate on your phone but he definitely seemed to notice you staring, smirking before he walked back up the stairs.

You already knew it was going to be a long weekend.

-----------------------------

@rumoured-whispers @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard @lma1986 @thisbicc @dominuslunae @miss570 @miamore0570 @jilliemiw86 @itsyaboinoah

[chuluoyi]

Chu! Chu! Lovely Chu! Chu! Chu!

I love your 'Love Entries' so, so much!! He's so cute!!! I want to squish his cheeks!!! <333

You're a brilliant writer!! So funny and so, so lovely!!!

Wishing you all the very best!! Xxxx

‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️

thank you so much for contacting but chu isn’t able to respond as she has turned into a mush of potato fluff after reading this ask. rest assured, your kind words will be resonating with her for days to come

[asteroidtroglodyte]

5 years ago, I was in Rehab.

10 years ago, I was watching my Potential and Opportunities dissolve and evaporate in an ocean of cheap gin and expensive whiskey.

But 5 years ago, I was in Rehab.

One of the exercises they had us perform was to imagine ourselves happy, 5 years in the future.

Many of us in that room had forgotten how to imagine nice things happening to them. A few snorted (well, I snorted), finding the notion that we’d even still be around in 5 years grimly humorous.

For about half of us, it was the last stop on the way down.

But I indulged the therapist. I was there, after all, because I did not want to die. So, I imagined myself, 5 years hence.

Happy.

It came to me all at once; an artistic remix on Norman Rockwell’s Freedom From Want, reframed with myself placing food at the table.

Sunday Dinner At My Place, I answered, when it came my turn to share my fantasy. I was asked what food I imagined eating.

It’s not the meal itself, I said, it’s the implications framed around it. Sunday Dinner At My Place means that I have a Place. It means that I have Family that will actually speak to me and friends who actually want to see me. It means money enough not just to feed myself but others too. It means having the time to spare to take the time preparing the meal.

A lot of nodding heads all around me. A struck chord. Many people with no Place, in that place. Nowhere that would lament their leaving.

5 years hence, as I lay down to sleep in my Home, with my Wife and my Son, surrounded by my Art and my Flowers, I reflect.

It was a long road. It was hard. We lost people. So many people. There were long days and long nights and hospital stays. Angry arguments with ghosts. I changed, in ways I never hoped for, or expected. Good ways, finally, for once. Slowly, against the backdrop of a world in chaos, I found my mind.

Sometimes, My Wife wondered aloud, what she did to deserve me. After some stumbling with my feelings, I eventually settled on an answer.

I’m a Rescue.

She gave me a Home.

And, so, I gave her a Family.

It seemed fair

This Sunday, my folks, which whom I have not had a shouting match in years, will come over for dinner. We will cook and eat together. My Friend became My Wife, and she took a piece of me and with it she made Our Son. There will be many hugs, and no violence. Good Things Happened.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t know what the future holds.

don’t give up yet, ok?

It could get good, even.

[slowlyfoggydestiny]

Soo it happen again huh

[spark1edog]

i don’t know how to talk loud enough to be heard ever

[snoopyracing]

champagne coast // ln4

pairing: lando norris X reader

word count: 19k

warnings: cursing and alcohol use

includes: friends to lovers, summer!lando, clueless reader and lando, pining, fluff, and a little angst

summary: when lando and you spend summer break together you don't expect italy to eventually hold such a special place in your heart... or lando and you go on vacation and everyone keeps thinking you're a couple.

playlist for the fic: spotify | apple music

masterlist

─── ༺❀༻ ───

It was the Monday before the Belgium Grand Prix when Lando asked – what are you doing for summer break?

The sun had started to set over the coast, its golden reflection rippling across the water and onto the balcony of Lando’s Monaco apartment. The same balcony that the two of you currently resided on, choosing to share the wicker couch instead of one of you sitting in one of the empty chairs.

You were sat sideways on the couch with your legs crossed, your view consisting more of Lando than the picturesque sunset over the sea. A cheap bottle of pink moscato, which was your favorite, was sitting on the table where Lando had his feet propped up.

He’d always complain about how sweet it was, but then drink more of it than you. In all reality, he’d actually grown to love it because of you, but he’d never tell you that. He’d only been able to find it at one place in Monaco, so when he knew you were coming to visit he always made sure to have a couple bottles on hand and maybe a bottle for himself when he was missing you.

Your eyes met his as you processed his question. This right now was your summer vacation. He surely knew that, right? “Summer break? I don’t have a summer break like you do, Lando.” It was true, you had barely managed to get this week off from work to be able to go to Belgium, let alone have a month off. “I figured me being here for a couple days then going to Belgium would be my vacation.”

A disapproving sigh escapes past his lips as he speaks. “That is not a vacation.”

“Well it sure as hell beats being stuck at an office in London.”

He downed the remainder of the wine in his glass and fully turned his body towards you. His arm resting across the back of the couch, his fingers nearly touching you. “I think you should come with me on vacation.”

You stifle a groan by taking a drink of your wine. “Lando, you know I don’t do Ibiza. It's not my kind of place, especially this time of year.” It was a beautiful place no doubt, but the big party scene was not your favorite. And the couple times you had gone with Lando and your shared friend group it was so chaotic and you had a hangover that lasted for what seemed like a week. So no– Ibiza and you weren’t the best of friends.

“Who said anything about Ibiza?” He’s got a smirk toying at the corners of his lips, you can tell by the way his upper lip twitches slightly. Not that you stare at his lips that much to be able to notice that kind of thing.

“Lando Norris not going to Ibiza during his summer break? Should I alert the press? Did you hit your head? Are you running a fever?” You lean forward to check his temperature, but he playfully swatted away your hand with a giggle before you could get close enough. “Have you broken the news to Fewt-”

That smirk had fully developed across his face as he cut you off. “Who said anything about Max?”

Now you really thought that he’d bumped his head or was slightly tipsy already. You cocked an eyebrow at him in question. “Where are you going then? Especially without Max?”

Lando leaned back, the wicker creaking beneath him, but his eyes were still trained on you. Golden hour had made them even more blue, resembling the crystal blue water that was just a short walk away. “I’m going wherever you want to go.”

“Lando.”

“Y/N.” He’s the one to cock an eyebrow now.

“I can’t go with you.”

His smirk had turned into a pout and he knew how to work those big blue eyes, especially on you. “Why not? Wherever you want to go– we will go. Not many people get that opportunity Y/N.”

You go to take another drink and realize your glass is empty, but before you can reach for the bottle Lando’s already got it in his hands, reaching over slightly to pour you another glass. “Who all is going then if Max isn’t going?”

He sets the bottle back down on the table, hesitating for a moment before speaking. You two are close, probably the closest friend he has compared to Max, but he worries that you won’t be up for what he’s about to suggest. “It would just be me and you.”

You feel your cheeks get hot at his proposal, but you shake it off, blaming it on the wine.

As much as the idea of Lando and you going on a trip together sounds amazing, you just don’t think you can make it work. You live a normal life and being able to just go on lavish trips at the drop of a hat is not something you get to experience, no matter how much Lando wants you to or you would like to.

“I would love to Lan, but I don't think I could get the time off again.” Your finger nervously circles the rim of the wine glass as you contemplate even bringing your other reason up. Mainly because you know what his answer will be, but against your better judgment you take another swig of the wine as liquid courage before telling him the embarrassing truth. “I also just can’t afford it.”

And without skipping a beat he blurts out. “I’ll pay.” You’re immediately shaking your head no, but before you can verbally deny his offer he’s speaking again “Seriously Y/N. I will pay. It’s not a big deal.”

Except him paying your way for this trip is a big deal. Just how it’s a big deal everytime you come and visit him in Monaco and he insists that you don’t spend a dime while you’re here. It’s bad enough that you stay at his place, let alone have him pay for your dinner every night. Or how he is always offering to fly you out to races on your free weekends. Or insisting that the random gifts he gives you don’t cost that much, like you can’t read the designer labels on the boxes or labels.

It makes you feel bad that you can’t offer the same back to him. The constant worry that he might think you are using him for his money makes your stomach hurt because it’s the last thing you’d ever do. He’s one of the most giving and kindest people you know and to be able to call him your best friend is something you treasure. And you truly hope he knows how much you appreciate everything he does for you, but how could he not when you tell him every chance you get.

“Lando, really I cannot let you pay for me to go on vacation. It’s one thing to let me crash at your apartment and for you to get me passes to races, which I appreciate more than you will ever know. But I draw the line at a whole vacation. I don’t want to seem like a freeloader who is using you, that’s honestly the la-”

“Oh my god will you just let me spoil you!” Lando had enough of your endless rambling. Your need to always try and decline his gifts or offerings until he convinces you that you are worthy of them drives him crazy. To Lando there isn’t a person on Earth who deserves everything and more than you. And the fact that he can afford to give you anything you’d ever want tickles him pink. Hell if it was possible, he’d buy you the whole damn universe, even if you hadn’t asked for it.

“I hate that you think– that I would think you’re using me. Never in a million years would I think that. You mean a lot to me Y/N, truly. You’re one the most important people in my life and you deserve everything and more that I give you. If I thought you were using me, I would not be asking you to go on vacation with me, believe me. I love having you around and with us not seeing each other like we used to, I figured a trip with just the two of us would be nice.”

He pauses for a moment as he scoots a little closer to you on the couch, your legs touching as the glow from the sun envelopes around you two. “Now please don’t try and worm your way out of this trip. I’ve missed you so much and if you don’t end up going I think you’re just gonna have to move in with me.”

You roll your eyes at his dramatics, but try not to let his heartfelt words get to your head. “How would I even get the time off work again? Tell them ‘Oh my famous F1 driver best friend wants to take me on a trip. Can I please have some more time off?’ I don’t think that would work.”

“Well I think it would work. Especially if you add in that I’m super hot.”

The giggles that come from you lets you know that you’ve drank your fair share of wine for the evening. “Oh I don’t think they would ever tell me no If I added that in.”

“If they do say no then just quit and I’ll get you a job somehow with McLaren or Quadrant or something. I just really want to go on this trip with you.”

You aren’t sure if it's the wine in your system or the fact that you want nothing more right now than to spend a week with Lando in some beautiful country, without a care in the world. But you ignore every responsible and logical part of you and tell him what he wants to hear.

“Alright. So where are we going then?”

His eyes light up and the smile that spreads across his face is comparable to that first win smile. “That’s all up to you baby.”

Both of your hearts skip a beat at the term of endearment that came from him. His because he can’t believe he let it slip and yours because you can’t believe he called you that so easily. But you both ignore it and you focus on the one place you’d had on your mind since he mentioned taking a trip.

“Italy?” You suggest with a hopeful smile on your face.

He fills up his glass with the last of the fruit juice like wine and holds it up towards you, your glasses clinking together in a toast. “Italy it is then.”

─── ༺❀༻ ───

Six days later an email notification pops up on your phone as you’re sitting in McLaren’s hospitality, talking with Lando’s Mom. You glance at who it’s from, not wanting to be rude and get on your phone mid conversation, but when you see your boss’s contact you can’t help but open it. “I’m sorry, it’s from work.” Cisca waved you off, the conversation had only consisted of why they couldn’t stock better snacks in hospitality, and she knew if work was emailing you on a Sunday it had to be important.

You had emailed them Monday night requesting the time off and when they hadn’t responded by Friday you figured they were denying it. Or firing you for requesting more time off while currently being on a vacation. So to be getting this email on a Sunday had you worried, but as your eyes scanned the email you couldn’t hold back the excitement. By some higher power unbestowed to you, they had granted you the time off.

“Never seen someone so excited over an email from work.” Cisca teased.

“Yeah. Honestly thought I was getting fired, but they approved my time off for the Italy trip Lando and I are taking.” You leaned back in the chair, relief finally washing over you.

“Just the two of you?” Cisca had her suspicions about her son’s feelings towards you and your feelings towards him. She’d secretly hoped the two of you would end up together the first time she met you years ago. She honestly thought you were his girlfriend that day and was surprised when he introduced you as his friend. Then she thought maybe he was hiding your relationship because she had never known her son to bring around a female friend like he had you.

You had attended family dinners, a couple holidays, races, and so many other things that just didn’t seem normal to bring a friend to. They had become so accustomed to you being around that when he finally said that he was bringing home his girlfriend for everyone to meet and you didn’t walk through the door— everyone was a little shell shocked. The relationship didn’t last long and she had her theories as to why. To Cisca there was just no way the two of you didn’t have feelings for eachother, she could see it plain as day, and it drove her crazy that the two of you didn’t see it.

“Yeah. At first I thought he was asking me to go to Ibiza again with everyone and you know me, it’s not my thing. But then he said we could go anywhere I wanted and that it was just me and him, so I chose Italy.” You gathered your things, eager to tell Lando the good news before race time. “You raised a good man, Cisca. I couldn’t ask for a better person in my life than him.”

There’s a smile on her face as she watches you talk about Lando, how your smile never falters and how that twinkle in your eye seems to get brighter the more you talk about him. “Thank you honey. You had better go tell him, hadn’t you?”

“I’ll be back!”

Thankfully Lando’s not that hard to find, he’s in the garage looking over some data on the monitors with Will when you spot him. You stand back out of the way, waiting until he’s done, but as soon as he turns to walk away you’re racing towards him. Your arms flinging around him from behind and you can feel him tense under you, but when he hears your laughter his muscles relax.

“What’s got you in such a good mood?” Lando asks as he turns around to face you, his hands lingering on your hips.

“Hmmm. It may have something to do with work approving my time off.”

That same smile from the other night finds its way onto his face and he’s pulling you into his arms, the two of you swaying back and forth as he nuzzles his head into your neck. “I knew they would approve it, it was meant to be.” His voice tickles your neck as he speaks causing a giggle to escape past your lips.

“Can’t believe we get to spend a week together in Italy.” You state as he releases you from his grip.

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.”

You furrow your eyebrows at him, still not sure that he wouldn’t rather be going to Ibiza with his friends.”You’re sure you’re not gonna miss Ibiza?”

His fingers toy with the hem of your shirt as he speaks– his blue eyes boring into yours. “I’d miss you more if I went.” And there isn’t a single ounce of doubt in his words. If he ended up going to Ibiza without you, he’d be at a club wondering what you were doing. Eventually downing one too many shots to try and numb that annoying ache in his chest that forms when you aren’t around. The one that even with you around this week, he had felt occasionally at the idea of you not being able to go to Italy.

The idea of him spending his summer break back in England had crossed his mind a couple times, especially if that meant he got to spend time with you. Luckily though fate was on his side today and he wouldn’t have to deal with that ache for the foreseeable future.

You can feel the slight blush on your cheeks as you process what Lando had said to you and you pray he doesn’t notice it. Just him simply saying he’d miss you if he went to Ibiza should not have you blushing, but here recently it seemed like that was all he could do was make you blush.

A familiar Australian accent hits your ears and around the corner comes Oscar, his hand clamping down on Lando’s shoulder as he comes up behind him. “Y/N. Haven’t seen you in awhile.” His bunny teeth showing as he flashes you a smile.

Your mouth barely opens to speak before Lando’s speaking for you. “I know. She’s been too busy working back in London to come see her favorite person.”

“I’m really such a horrible friend. I’m so sorry Oscar, I really should make more time to see you. In fact, how’s Australia this time of year? I think I might come visit you.” The playful smirk on your face and Oscar’s laugh does nothing to tell Lando that you’re just joking and like a little kid he’s got his arms crossed across his chest with a slight pout on his face.

“Um. I think I’m your favorite person Y/N. Plus you can’t even go to Australia because we are going to Italy.”

Oscar and you can’t help but laugh at Lando’s dramatics, but Oscar wants to tease Lando even further. He knows how his older teammate feels about you, even if Lando won’t give the idea any time of day when Oscar brings it up. Lando had confided in Oscar about his idea to take you on a trip, but Oscar didn’t think he’d actually go through with it. “Italy? Who’s all going? Maybe Lily and I could tag along?”

Lando’s eyes widen at Oscar’s suggestion, mainly because he knows you’d jump at any opportunity to spend time with Lily and this trip was meant to be just for the two of you. “It’s just gonna be me and Y/N…” He trials off, trying to figure out how to nicely tell Oscar that he can’t come.

“There's a month between Singapore and Austin. We should all plan something for then.” You chime in. As much as you would love to spend time with Oscar and Lily, you really want to have this trip just be Lando and you.

Lando’s surprised at you turning down Oscar’s suggestion, but smiles and nods towards Oscar, agreeing with your idea. “Yeah that sounds like a good idea.” Oscar states, a small smirk on his face as he eyes the two of you, fully knowing that you’ll come back from Italy together. And if you don’t Oscar thinks he may have to knock some sense into his teammate.

The driver’s parade was set to start soon, so you tell Oscar you’ll see him around and give Lando a hug, knowing you won’t see him again until after the race. “I’ll see you later, yeah? Be safe and good luck.”

Lando’s grip on you lingers, not wanting to fully let you go just yet, but when they get the final warning that it’s time to go he reluctantly frees you. A small frown on his face as he heads towards the track and you go back to hospitality.

The two McLaren drivers stood side by side on the flatbed of the moving truck, smiles on their faces as they waved at the fans in the grandstands. “Never seen two friends like you and Y/N go on a trip together– alone.” Oscar’s voice is low, there’s an interview going on to his left, but he’s loud enough that Lando can hear him.

Lando keeps looking straight forward as he speaks. “Don’t know what you mean by that.”

“I think you fully know what I mean.”

Max, who was on the other side of Lando, had been eavesdropping the whole time, and couldn’t help but put his two cents in. “If you’re talking about what I think you’re talking about. I just want to say, do us all a favor and finally tell her how you feel.”

Lando shook his head at the two drivers. You two were just very close best friends, there wasn��t anything he needed to admit to you. It was just a trip that two best friends were going on and there was nothing more to it– right?

─── ༺❀༻ ───

A week and a half later your plane touches down in Naples and even though the flight from London is only around three hours you want nothing more than to just get to the hotel and relax.

The Uber ride from the airport to the hotel thankfully doesn’t take long and you have no issue with sitting down in the lobby of the hotel with all the luggage while Lando checks you two in. You do notice that it’s taking quite a long time for Lando to check in and as you glance up from your phone towards the reception desk you see him talking with the worker and showing her something on his phone. Then with a sigh and a shake of his head he turns on his heel back towards you.

“Everything alright?” You ask.

He slips his phone back into his pocket and grabs his suitcase. “I booked us a two bedroom suite and they told me that all they have available is a one bedroom. Even though I showed them the booking on my phone, someone is already in it. So, I’ll just take the couch and you can have the bed.”

This place was fancy, and Lando had undoubtedly paid a pretty penny for the two nights that you were staying here. You would have thought they would have comped the room or something for their mistake. But by the displeased look on his face it didn’t seem they offered him anything but a sorry for the inconvenience.

Even with the hotel screwing up the room, the one you end up with is amazing and as you enter the room your jaw drops slightly at it. You set your bags down and explore the room further, taking in all the beautiful artwork on the walls and the natural light streaming in through the floor to ceiling windows. You enter a door to your left and it’s the bedroom, which is even better than the main room, mainly because of the huge balcony that overlooks the sea.

There’s a gentle breeze in the air as you lean against the railing, taking in the view and the hustle and bustle from the surrounding area.

“Beautiful isn’t it?” Lando’s voice makes you jump, you were so lost in your own little world you didn’t even hear him come out onto the balcony. You nod your head in agreement as he slots himself beside you, mimicking your actions of leaning on the railing. “And it’s not even the best part of our trip.”

“You know you didn’t have to get such a nice room, we are only in Naples for two days.” As much as you try not to feel guilty about him paying for all of this, you do.

“And what did I say a couple weeks ago?”

A groan emits from you as you remember his words to you in Monaco. “You said to let you spoil me.”

“Exactly. I just want you to enjoy yourself and stop worrying about how much everything costs. We are here to relax and have fun, which means figuring out what we want to do tonight.”

You ponder your endless options and all you really want to do is sit on this balcony and enjoy the view, but your stomach growling tells you maybe dinner would be a good idea first. “We are in Italy– how about getting some pizza and then just come back here and relax?” Lando agrees and while you’re freshening up he looks up good pizza places within walking distance.

You two are just about ready to leave when there's a knock on the door, followed by room service!

A confused look is shared between you two, but when Lando looks through the peephole there stands a worker with a room service cart. He opens the door and is greeted with a smile from the employee.

“From the hotel as an apology about the room.” The employee hands Lando an ice bucket with a bottle of champagne nestled in it. “Have a nice rest of your stay.”

Lando looks back at you with an amused look on his face as the guy quickly leaves, the wheels of the cart squeaking as he hurries down the hall. “Well, we have something to drink on the balcony later.” Lando states as he sets the bucket down on the coffee table.

“Champagne and pizza? No thanks.” You see there’s a card attached to the bottle and as you open the envelope and read the words written, your cheeks turn scarlet.

“What does it say?” Lando questions, moving to stand behind you so he can read it too. His eyes scan the letter and he soon finds himself in the same state as you. He clears his throat as he steps back, suddenly feeling too close to you at the moment.

to the happy couple,

we are so deeply sorry about the mix up with rooms and we hope you can accept our apologies. we’ve sent a bottle of the finest champagne that you can get in naples and have comped any room service you may order during your stay. as always if you need anything please don’t hesitate to call the front desk and once again we sincerely apologize for our mistake. we hope you enjoy your stay here and the city of naples.

The letter isn’t spoken about, actually what you two were addressed as isn’t spoken about, but you both agree that their actions were nice. The walk to the pizza place is quiet, the both of you occasionally pointing out things that you think are interesting or pretty, but both of your minds are preoccupied with being mistaken for a couple. Anyone else would have laughed it off, but clearly not the two of you.

By the time you’re back at the hotel and sat on the balcony with the pizza and champagne your conversation had returned to normal. You teasing Lando about not even drinking the glass he had poured for himself and him complaining about you insisting that you get a pizza that has peppers on it.

“You know what would make this evening even better?” The pizza is long gone and the two of you are sat admiring the painting in the sky left behind from the sun.

“Some pink moscato?” There’s a grin on his face as he says it. If there’s one thing he knows you love, it’s a glass of pink moscato on a balcony with a view.

You try to hide the smile on your face as you glance over at him, but he’s caught you. “You know me too well Norris.”

“Should’ve told that employee that we wanted a ten dollar bottle of wine instead of that champagne.” Lando jokes.

“Thought you didn’t like it? That it was too sweet?”

He shuffles slightly in his seat, fully knowing that you’d caught on to his facade. “I may have grown to love it.” He admits quietly.

You’d known for a while, but hearing him say it was much more satisfying. “Yeah. Kinda figured it out last year when you started drinking more of it than me.”

Nighttime draws near and once you start yawning, so does Lando, and after the fourth round of yawning Lando states that it’s time for bed. The subject the two of you hadn’t discussed any further than what was said in the lobby earlier. The guilt started to eat at you as you brushed your teeth, he’d invited you and is paying for everything and he doesn’t even get to sleep in a bed? What kind of friend were you?

Lando was making the couch up as you walked out of the bathroom and for this being a luxury hotel that couch looked stiff and seemed to be more for show than actual comfort. He already had a bad back and it looked like sleeping on that couch was going to have him trying to find a chiropractor tomorrow instead of sightseeing. “Lan. You take the bed and I’ll sleep on the couch.”

He doesn’t even look back at you, still occupied with trying to make the couch somewhat comfortable. “No. I’ll be fine. You take the bed.”

“Lando.”

“Y/N.”

“Lando, look at me.” You knew he wasn’t going to budge with the whole couch thing, so you thought of the next best thing. The two of you sharing the bed. It was plenty big and truly it shouldn’t be that big of a deal if you two shared it. You were grown adults and bestfriends, no one should have to sleep on the couch.

His focus tears away from the couch and over to you, who’s already in bed and under the covers. “Look at how big this bed is.” Your body extends over to the other side trying to show him just how big the bed is. “Just sleep in the bed with me, there is plenty of room.”

Your offer takes him by surprise and he stills for a moment, he’d love nothing more than to climb into that bed right now, but a part of his brain is telling him not to. And he’s about ready to tell you no once again until he makes eye contact with you. Those damn eyes of yours could be used in interrogation rooms across the world, one look into them and he’s crumbling like a poorly built sandcastle. The gentle pat on the empty side of the bed is what flattens the sandcastle and he’s mumbling out an okay before sliding under the sheets next to you.

The two of you don’t know what to do for a moment, both still and flat on your backs under the sheets, like if you moved an inch the gremlin under the bed was going to get you. But eventually Lando turns on his side, mumbling out a goodnight as he pulls the comforter closer to him. You take his actions as a sign for you to roll over too and you figured that falling asleep wouldn’t be an issue after all the yawning earlier, but you were wrong. You tried counting sheep, tried laying on your back, tried anything you could think of to fall asleep and nothing worked. It wasn’t like there was a major time difference between here and London, it was literally only an hour, so unfortunately jet lag could not be to blame.

Lando hadn’t moved the whole time and you figured he fell asleep as soon as he turned over, but you were bored and going a little crazy because even though you were tired, you couldn’t fall asleep. “Lando.” You whispered, but got no response. “Lando. Are you awake?” You whisper a little louder this time, but still no response. So with a defeated sigh you roll back over and shut your eyes, praying that this time you can go to sleep. But within a matter of seconds you feel the bed shift and Lando’s voice echoing through the room.

“I’m awake.”

You roll back over— the two of you now facing each other. “Why didn’t you answer me a minute ago?”

“I was trying to go to sleep myself.”

“Oh sorry. I’ll go out to the other room and watch some TV or something.” You barely move an inch before Lando’s got his fingers wrapped around your forearm, gently pulling you back towards him.

“No, don't leave.”

You can feel your heartbeat quickening as you realize just how close the two of you are. The glow from the moon cascades through the balcony doors allowing you to make out the moles on his face and those pretty long eyelashes of his that make his already breathtaking eyes seem even more beautiful. Sometimes you think he has stars in his eyes from the way that they sparkle. And as the two of you lay here right now, you realize the only reason that the moonlight is flooding into the room is because she’s looking for her lost stars that have found a home in Lando’s eyes.

“You got any ideas on how to fall asleep? I’ve tried just about everything in the book.” For some reason you're whispering and you wonder if it’s from how close you are to Lando’s face or how suddenly nervous you are to be this close to Lando.

He’s silent for a moment, the logical and sane part of him screaming at him to not even suggest what he’s been thinking about ever since climbing under these sheets. The mere idea of it being the thing that had prevented him from being fast asleep by now. But he’s got you at literal fingertips length and he thinks there may not be another opportunity like this again. So– he acts with his heart and not his brain.

“Come here.” He’s moved onto his back with his arm outstretched towards you.

“Huh?” You know exactly what he’s insinuating, but you can’t actually believe that he is.

“You wanted an idea on how to fall asleep and this is my idea. I’ll get you to fall asleep in no time.

“You think us cuddling is gonna get me to fall asleep?” You definitely hadn’t wondered what it would be like to be wrapped up in Lando’s arms before. How it would feel to have his fingertips trance mindless patterns across your skin or have your head on his chest. He was your best friend, which meant those thoughts had never crossed your mind– right?

He shrugs, trying to hide the nervousness in his demeanor, the mere thought of you denying him right now was enough to have him on the next flight back to Monaco in the morning. He should have never put himself in this situation, but god as soon as he climbed into this bed all he wanted to do was have you wrapped up in his arms.

It had consumed his brain, and then consumed it even more because why was he having this desire to have such a tender moment with his best friend? Though his brain stops spiraling when he feels the bed shift and you’re suddenly tucking yourself into his side, arm slung over his torso, and your head laying on his chest. The same chest that his heart is about ready to beat out of and he prays you can’t hear how hard it’s working.

But as you both get settled and Lando’s heartbeat finally mellows out he realizes just how right this feels, like the two of you were matching puzzle pieces. Any other girl he had cuddled with before now seemed to feel wrong because as far as he was concerned, nothing felt better than this. It felt natural and easy and he found himself drawing absent minded patterns on your side where your shirt had bunched up.

He’d spend the rest of his life here in this moment with you if he could. And when he hears your slight snores something short circuits in his brain and he’s pressing a kiss to the top of your head mumbling out goodnight before he’s out like a light too. The moonlight blanketing over the two of you, who right now look more like lovers than best friends.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

The next morning you’re already up and ready for the day by the time Lando wakes up and he tries to hide the disappointment of not waking up next to you, already missing the feeling of having you so close. A feeling though nice, he knew it was one that he probably shouldn’t be feeling. He asks you if you slept well while he’s getting ready and you tell him yes, not going into very much detail, for your own sake and his.

The day is full of sightseeing and lots of walking, which is something that Lando likes to complain about. You visit Pompeii and a handful of other places for you and Lando to nerd out about and truly be tourists. You eat amazing food that Lando says his trainer will hate him for, but he justifies it with the excuse of being on vacation. Hundreds of pictures were taken, your phones already begging for more storage and it was only the first day of the trip. Lando even went as far as bringing an actual camera, stating that lando.jpg would be revived soon.

But in between the sightseeing, eating, and everything else– both of your brains immediately go back to the sleeping arrangements from last night. You both can’t stop thinking about it, but no one brings it up, almost like it’s something you should be ashamed of. No one wants to admit how right it felt to be in eachothers arms last night or how both of you probably had the best sleep of your lives.

You didn’t want to admit that when you woke up this morning to Lando spooning you, your stomach was doing flips over the realization that you had moved in the middle of the night and he had found his way back to you. So many thoughts and emotions running through your brains, yet you both think it’s better to just act like it's not a big deal.

Night falls once again and Lando crawls into bed next to you. You’re both absolutely spent after the eventful day you’ve had and Lando worries that you won’t need him to fall asleep, but his worries soon dissipate because you’re tucking yourself into his side as soon as he’s gotten himself comfortable. You’re like a moth to a flame– the consequences of these actions never even enter your mind as slowly feel yourself drifting off to sleep.

And when morning comes you don’t run away when you feel Lando’s arms around you, even with the butterflies making an appearance again. You enjoy your moment alone, the sun shining in through the windows, the sound of the city already alive, and the way Lando looks as he sleeps. It's truly a beautiful morning.

He wakes up not too long after you and there’s a funny feeling in his chest when he realizes that he’s gotten to wake up with you still in his arms. That you were the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes. It all just feels so natural and right, that once again no words are spoken about this very non-platonic thing that is happening between you two.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

“We’ve got a little bit a drive ahead of us today.” Lando states as he comes out of the bathroom in nothing but a towel. Water droplets are scattered across his tan skin, his damp curls falling slightly onto his forehead. You’re trying not to stare, but good lord how could anyone not.

“It’s only like an hour.” You're still sitting in bed, propped up against the headboard as you now watch him rummage through his suitcase.

He holds up a shirt and shorts, silently asking for your opinion. You give him a nod of approval and he heads back to the bathroom to get dressed, but he leaves the door slightly cracked so he can still talk to you. “Yeah it was an hour. I’ve canceled the driver and made some new plans for today.”

“New plans?” You raise your voice slightly so he can hear you.

“It’s a surprise.” He peeks his head around the slightly open door— a mischievous smile painted across his face, before disappearing behind it once more. “So you had better start getting ready.” He commands as the door fully opens, revealing a fully dressed Lando.

A few short moments later a domestic scene plays out in the bathroom mirror. The double sinks both occupied, various hair products, makeup, and other random items are scattered across the counter. You’re watching Lando through the mirror as he tries to wrangle the mop of curls on his head, but everytime you look away he’s watching you brush your teeth or do your skincare. And the occasional times your eyes do meet in the mirror you’re both like little kids, eyes immediately darting away with smiles on your faces and little giggles echoing through the bathroom.

“You gonna tell me what the surprise is?” Patience had never been your strong suit and thus knowing about surprises was like a form of torture to you.

“If I told you it wouldn’t be a surprise now would it?” He’s still screwing with his hair, but he’s looking at you through the mirror.

“Oh come on, just tell me. Pretty pretty please?” You’ve come up behind him, your chin resting on his shoulder as you flash your best puppy dog eyes at him through the mirror. And for a split second Lando almost cracks– those puppy dog eyes working on him better than you would have ever thought.

“The faster we pack everything up, the faster you get the surprise.” He’s shocked his words come out smoothly, his brain still foggy from your pretty eyes and close contact.

Ten minutes later you’re walking out of the elevator and into the hotel lobby, where Lando tells you to wait while he goes outside for a moment. You assume the surprise is outside and so you try to peek and see what’s out there, but he’s coming back in before you can get a good look.

“Alright let’s go.”

You don’t see anything that you would consider surprise worthy as you walk out the doors, but then Lando leads you towards the cars parked outside the hotel and stops in front of a vintage yellow Ferrari. Your eyes dart back and forth between Lando and the car, unsure if he was just stopping to admire it or if you were going to be riding in it. He answers your unasked question by opening the passenger side door, motioning for you to get in.

“Is this the surprise? Where did you even get this car from?” Your eyes widening over the car itself and the fact that he’d gone through the trouble of even finding the car.

“It’s part of the surprise-” He’s got a smirk on his face as he speaks “and I have my connections.” He motions once again for you to get into the car and this time you don’t oblige. The leather seat soft under your legs as you sit down, the car was surely close to 60 years old, yet still looked brand new.

Lando puts the luggage in the trunk while you're examining all of the car’s little quirks and details while you wait.

“Ok, you ready?” Lando asks as he gets in the driver's seat.

“Gonna tell me the other part of the surprise?”

He sighs, he wanted you to figure it out on your own, but you were so persistent sometimes. “You know how you’ve always talked about wanting to drive along the coast of Italy?” You nod, a smile already forming on your face as you realize what he’s planned for you. “Well, instead of just taking the straight shot over, we’re gonna take the long way all along the Amalfi coast. And I figured it was only fitting that we do it in a Ferrari, considering we are in Italy after all.”

You can’t wipe the smile off your face as you stare at Lando from the passenger seat. Sometimes you wondered if he was even listening to you when you spoke, but then he pulls stuff like this and you know that he’s always listening– remembering things that you care about or like. “God, I don’t deserve you.”

Thankfully the car is still parked because you’re pulling Lando into a bone crushing hug, your cheek smushed up against the side of his head, a giggle emitting from him as he tries to hug you back.

“When you told me your work approved the time off, I knew for sure that this was one thing that I wanted to make happen. That same night I was online trying to find a car to rent for the day, but then I saw this one for sale…” His words trail off and your jaw drops at the realization, but in all reality you know it’s a very Lando thing to do.

“And now we’re sitting in your newest baby?”

He’s got a sheepish look on his face as he speaks. “As soon as I saw it I knew it was the perfect car for this. Plus it’s the ultimate vacation souvenir!”

“You’re crazy.” He actually couldn’t be more perfect.

“Yeah, but you love me.” He teases as he starts the engine.

“Unfortunately.”

─── ༺❀༻ ───

The long winding road along the coast provided scenery that was beyond your wildest dreams. It was serene and picturesque– like something straight out of a movie. The bright blue water on one side of the road and the white stone mountains on the other. The various tunnels that somehow had even more breathtaking views on the other side of them. The handful of towns that you had to drive through, each of them more charming than the last, you only wished you had enough time to stay a week in all of them.

As simple as this was, you would have been more than content with this trip if you went home tomorrow, not that you wanted to, it was just that sometimes the simple things in life meant more than anything lavish to you. You weren’t hard to please, all you needed was Lando singing along to some song on the radio, beautiful scenery, and the wind blowing in your hair for you to be the happiest girl in the world right now.

The whole trip your attention was divided between the coastal beauty and the beauty in the driver's seat. You couldn’t help but glance over ever so often at Lando, especially when you’d hear him start to sing along to a song. He just looked so ethereal sitting next to you, one hand on the steering wheel– the other resting between you two.

There was a moment where you felt the sudden urge to reach out and intertwine your fingers with his, a moment of insanity you’d thought. It surely had nothing to do with how sunkissed he looked from only being in the sun one day, or how the wind had made his curls the perfect amount of messy, or how you’d catch him looking over at you with a smile on his face.

If only you knew that Lando had been fighting the urge to reach out and grab your hand too. He’d never seen you so ecstatic over something as simple as going for a drive, but he’d drive this car till he ran out of road or gas, whichever came first, just to see that smile of yours. The way your eyes sparkled in the sunlight and how you giggled at his singing was just an added bonus, but all of them made his chest feel funny. He’d been around the world more times than he could count, seen so many breathtaking places, but right now none of those places compared to the beauty that was sitting next to him in this car.

You’re in your own little world so much that you don’t even realize you’ve made it to your destination until Lando’s putting the car in park in front of a very luxurious looking villa. “We’ve arrived.” Lando states in a sing-song voice.

“Is this when you tell me Max and everyone else are actually coming too?” You question, flabbergasted over the size of the house. And you can tell what he’s thinking just by his facial expression. “Lando this place is huge just for the two of us.”

He rolls his eyes before getting out of the car to get luggage. “It’s actually a lot smaller than you think.”

When you step foot into the two story villa it immediately has that Mediterranean coast charm with intricate tile floors, artwork that adorns the walls, and windows with the most gorgeous views– needles to say you’re in love.

Then you take in just how big the place is with it’s one too many bedrooms and bathrooms and various other rooms that you probably won’t even use. Lando’s words echo in your head as you explore the house some more, and there’s nothing small about this place at all. “You’re such a liar Lan.” Your words are playful as you walk through one of the many french doors in the house that leads out to the back.

“Lie? I would nev-”

“Oh my god!” He’s cut off by you realizing that the backyard of this villa is nothing shy of paradise. A massive pergola covered part of the back of the house with vibrant bougainvillea lining the top and hanging down the sides. Various other flowers and plants are scattered strategically around the area. Under the pergola there's an outdoor kitchen and a large glass dining table, clearly meant to host a group of people, not two. Further out there’s a pool with sunbeds lined down one side of it– a poolside bar on the other.

All of these things are great, but the real show stopper is the view that this place has. From the front of the house you can’t really tell just how close you are to the water, but from out back it’s a completely different view. There’s a separate sitting area slightly further out from the pool. It’s got a little pergola of its own with couches and chairs and one of those fancy rock fire pits and that is where you get the best view.

It’s like something out of a nature documentary– it’s so perfect that it almost seems fake. The sea is so close that you can hear the waves crashing against the rocks and it’s just endless bright blue water for days. You thought the view in Naples was pretty, but this was breathtaking.

“Knew you’d love this place.” Lando states as he comes up beside you, acting like he hadn’t been lingering behind you the whole time, admiring the view (you) from afar.

It was true though, Lando knew as soon as he saw this place online that it was the one. It didn’t matter that he paid an astronomical amount for it or that the house was way too big for just the two of you. All it took was for him to see the view to know you’d be the happiest girl in the world here.

He could picture you two sitting out here in the evening, watching the sun set over the coast, undoubtedly with a bottle of pink moscato. You’d end up drinking one too many glasses and your cheeks would get red and you’d get the giggles.

As Lando stood here– eyes never leaving the beautiful scene in front of him. He can’t help but feel that funny feeling in his chest over how radiant and happy you look. And he thinks that if this house was for sale he’d buy it in a heartbeat, if that meant he got to see you like this all the time.

A smile finds its way onto your face as you glance over at the guy you call your best friend. “You weren’t lying when you said you were gonna spoil me, huh?” You gently nudge him with your elbow, your smile growing even bigger at his response.

“Only the best for my favorite person.” His smile is equally as big as you lean your head on his shoulder and in that moment he thinks that maybe the reserve driver could just finish out the season and he could just stay here with you.

That night as you both head to your rooms there’s an obvious tension in the air. You’re both slowly making your ascent up the stairs and lingering in the hall, trying to milk every last second until you inevitably have to go into your separate rooms.

After so long though, you’re the first to cave as your hand reaches for the doorknob. Your door creaks open and you’re mumbling out goodnight lan, i’ll see you in the morning before entering the room. Although you don’t close the door behind you and Lando takes that as an invitation to linger in your doorway. He doesn’t need to speak for you to know he’s there, you can feel his presence, and subconsciously you’ve left that door open for him.

“Goodnight Y/N.” You’ve got your back turned to him as you're digging through your suitcase for pajamas, but you can hear the slight grin he has on his face as he speaks.

The sight of Lando as you turn around has butterflies erupting in your stomach and it makes you feel weird to be feeling those things about your best friend. He’s leaned up against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest and that grin that you’d sensed him having was still on his face as he looked at you. Your eyes scanned over him, focusing on little details like his hair still being wind tousled and how the tops of his cheeks were slightly burnt from the car ride today.

And for someone who claimed to not need a ton of sleep– he looked so sleepy as the two of you locked eyes. Those big blue eyes slowly blinking and drooping ever so slightly as his head now too rested against the door frame. He still donned the hoodie that you teased him about putting on earlier after his claims of it being chilly once the sun set, only adding to the sleepy look he had going on right now.

Someone had never looked so cozy and you wanted nothing more than to be wrapped up in his arms, but that wasn’t going to happen tonight. You will tell him goodnight again and he’ll close the door behind him before shuffling over to his room. Your mind will be preoccupied with him as you get ready for bed, the image of him in your doorway forever burned into your mind as you brush your teeth. As you crawl into bed you won’t think about how cold the sheets feel or how you want to be cuddled up to your best friend. You won’t think about how it’s been two hours that you’ve laid here and sleep has yet to greet you. And you certainly won’t think about how you’d be fast asleep right now if Lando was beside you.

But unfortunately you do think about all those things and you’ve exhausted every resource to try and distract you from it. It was different at the hotel when there was only one bed, but now with multiple bedrooms to choose from there was no reason for the two of you to sleep in the same bed. Lines were already blurring between you two without either of you knowing it and if you chose to go seek solace with Lando then those lines would blur even more.

But you didn’t know that your actions would eventually have consequences and seconds later you’re throwing the covers off of you with only one destination in mind– Lando’s room. The journey though, is short lived because as soon as you open your door you’re met with a wide eyed Lando, his fist frozen in the air like he was getting ready to knock on your door.

The frozen fist moves to rubbing the back of his neck as he speaks to you. “Sorry, was coming to see if you were still awake.”

“I was coming to see if you were up too.” He’s still got that hoodie on from earlier, but you noticed he’d changed out his shorts for boxers. His hair was even more messy and you’d wondered if he had even fallen asleep yet. “Couldn’t sleep either?”

Lando shrugs. “Not really– kept tossing and turning.” He acts like the reason he can’t go to sleep isn’t right in front of him as he rests his head on the familiar door frame.

“Yeah I can tell by your hair.” You tease. He just gives you a half assed smile and when he doesn’t tease you back that’s when you realize just how tired he is. “You want to watch some TV or something? ”

He shakes his head no. The only thing he wants to do is go to sleep, but how can he when you’re not next to him? It was embarrassing to admit that only after two nights of sharing the same bed that he couldn’t sleep on his own, but here he was. His big bed felt too empty and he realized that even if he slept in a twin sized bed it would still feel empty without you next to him.

Not to mention he’d found comfort in you being his personal heater at night. It was no secret that Lando ran cold, often seen sporting a jacket during race weekends while his teammate was in shorts. So with his personal heater gone, he’d resorted to wearing a hoodie to bed, which didn’t come close to holding a candle to you.

When he finally worked up the courage to get up and go to your room he was pleasantly surprised to find you up too and facing the same problem as him. A little sliver of him hoping that it was the exact same problem and that you couldn’t sleep without him.

For a split second you caught his eyes looking past you and towards your bed. He couldn’t have made it any more obvious, but if was actually hinting at what you thought he was hinting at, then you weren’t going to pass up on the opportunity. It wasn’t a coincidence that he had come to your door and that you both had trouble sleeping in separate beds. So, you act on impulse and tell him come on just sleep in here tonight and like a little kid who’s gotten scared of the thunder at night he’s crawling into your bed in an instant.

It’s like you two are magnets– immediately finding your way to each other under the sheets and it doesn’t take long for the both of you to finally fall asleep. And some time in the middle of the night Lando had shed his hoodie, no longer needing it with you pressed against him. When you two wake in the morning with the sun streaming through the windows and sleepy smiles plastered on your faces, there’s an unspoken agreement that even with the plethora of beds in this house, you two would be sleeping in the same one every night.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

Lando and you were best friends, nothing more. Nevermind the sharing a bed every night or the longing glances or the sometimes suggestive thoughts you had about him. So maybe your friendship wasn’t practical or normal, but there was nothing romantic going on between you two. It was something you had drilled into your head for some time now. You’d try to ignore the way your heart would speed up when you’d catch him looking at you or the way he always has to have physical contact with you. And any other crazy thoughts that you’d speculated about had always been pushed aside rather quickly. He was your best friend after all and once again nothing more.

Though over the course of the week you’d found yourself having a hard time in pushing aside those non platonic thoughts about Lando. There were instances you two had found yourselves in that you just couldn’t ignore.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

“What’s the plan for today?” You ask as the two of you are sitting outside the cutest little restaurant, enjoying brunch.

Lando finishes the last little bit of his eggs before answering you. “Well nothing that involves you getting behind a motor vehicle with the way you’ve been downing those bellinis.” You roll your eyes at his dramatics. Yes, you’d had your fair share of bellinis, but they were so damn good and there really wasn’t that much alcohol in them for it to be an issue. “How about we just see where the day takes us?”

“Well I already had the idea of renting jet skis in my head, but I guess we’ll do what you suggested.” You joke.

Now Lando’s the one to roll his eyes at you as he flags down the waiter for the check. He doesn’t even look at it when it’s brought over, he just hands his card over like it’s nothing. It’s something that you still aren’t used to him doing even after knowing him for so long and you’re sure he’s gotten ripped off more times than he could imagine.

He quickly signs for it once the waiter comes back and with his card back in his wallet you’re free to go. Except when you stand up all those bellinis hit you and you’re a little unsteady on your feet, something that Lando clocks immediately. You aren’t drunk, just buzzed, but Lando isn’t going to let you live this down. “You wanted to rent jet skis huh?” He teases as he wraps an arm around your waist to steady you.

“Think we still could to be honest.” You’re confident in your ability to walk on your own, but Lando insists on keeping his hold on you.

“Well I don’t want to waste a day at the hospital, so let’s just look around at the shops.”

You’d passed them on your way to brunch and Lando had promised you’d come back to them. They were cute little stores, each one specializing in certain things. You took your time in each one, feeling the silky material of some of the dresses, admiring the leather detailing on the handbags, and gawking at the dazzling jewelry in the displays. Everything was quite luxurious and your eyes couldn’t help but linger on a certain bag and bracelet, but the price tags were all you had to see to know they weren’t coming home with you.

Lando had been watching you the whole time, fully prepared to be your bag boy and was ready to pull out his wallet whenever he’d see you pick something up. But much to his disappointment, all you did was look and after going through all the stores you left empty handed. “You didn’t see anything you wanted?” Lando asks as you continue down the street.

You simply shrug your shoulders at him. “Nothing that I couldn’t live without.” He doesn’t press the matter anymore, fully knowing that he’d be coming back sometime this week to get you that bag and bracelet that you kept circling back to.

The streets are charming and bright. It’s a place that you can’t help but feel alive in, especially as the summer sun beats down on you, but the light breeze coming in off the sea makes it bearable. Your buzz was long gone, but Lando still insisted that you link your arm with his as you stroll down the streets– just in case. You don’t oblige to his request, enjoying the feeling of holding onto his solid bicep as the sound of him slightly humming the song that was playing at brunch fills your ears.

A sense of peacefulness washes over you and it’s at this moment that you don’t feel like you’re on the arm of the famous Formula 1 driver Lando Norris. He doesn’t have a million cameras on him or people flocking to him for an autograph. It’s just you and your best friend Lando– the boy who was gagging when you teased the idea of ordering fish at dinner last night or who you laid in bed with this morning, watching dumb Tiktoks until you were both in tears laughing. It was nice for once, to just have Lando.

You’re just about ready to circle back to the villa when you hear a woman shouting in Italian from down the street. You’re not anywhere near fluent, but you recognize some basic words and what you’ve heard has you pulling Lando towards the voice.

Fior! Bei Fiori!

At the end of the street there stood the lady, who had a cart of the most vibrant fresh flowers. When she spotted the two of you approaching, a smile painted itself across her face. “I think your pretty girl deserves some flowers, don’t you?”

The corners of your mouth turn upwards and a smile is painted across your face. You can feel your cheeks getting warm at her statement, at the implication that you were Lando’s, but it’s his response that makes them comparable to the roses found on the cart.

Lando feels his chest get tight over the lady assuming the two of you were together. It’s nothing new, for people to assume that he’s with a girl just because he’s seen with one. Though for some reason when someone says it about you, it gets a reaction out of him. He’s grinning as he looks at you and then back to the sweet old lady. “You’re right, my pretty girl does deserve some flowers.”

The butterflies that erupted in your stomach at his words were embarrassing and not the appropriate reaction to be having over your best friend, but his comment wasn’t very platonic either. You’re blushing and grinning, probably very easily comparable to a school girl at the moment. He’s got a smug look on his face as he hands you of course the biggest bouquet the lady had. It’s truly a beautiful bouquet and it smells divine, it had anything you could have gotten at the shops beaten by a mile.

As you head back towards the villa you can’t wipe the smile off your face and you can’t stop thinking about my pretty girl. The words shamelessly repeating over and over again in your head. “So you think I’m pretty huh?” You tease.

Now Lando’s the one to blush and he hopes you just think it’s just from the heat and sun as you look at him. “Of course I do. I’d have to be blind to not think so.” He’s sincere with his words, he truly thinks you’re one of the most breathtaking women he’s ever met– intellectually and physically.

You lean your head on his arm, the same one you’ve still wrapped yourself around. “You sure know how to swoon 'em.”

“You’re my best friend. I wouldn’t lie to you.”

And for the first time, for both of you, it feels weird and almost stings to hear the word best friend said out loud. Because deep down you know you’re way more than that.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

Although you weren’t that much of a party girl you didn’t mind going out every once in a while. So when Lando suggested going out to one of the bars tonight it didn’t seem like a bad idea. You’d done your fair share of relaxing and to you that meant a night out deserved to be had.

With a final spritz of your perfume you’re ready to go and as you looked in the mirror one last time you couldn’t help but think damn, I look good. You found Lando waiting for you in the foyer, his head lifting up from his phone at the sound of your heels clicking down the stairs. “Might want to close your mouth before you attract flies Lan.” He hadn’t even realized he was in that much of a trance until you said something, he could feel his cheeks getting warm at getting caught.

You hook your arm with his as he leads you out the front door. “Sorry, you just look unreal tonight.”

“Well you don’t look too bad yourself.” He’d chosen his tried and true white button up, leaving the first few buttons undone, which revealed even more of his gorgeous tanned skin. How someone could make something as simple as a white button up shirt look so good was beyond you, but it was clearly something he was skilled at.

The bar you end up at is relatively small and you realize it must be the most popular one with how packed it is. It’s on the coast and there’s a gorgeous outdoor area that you are immediately drawn to, mainly because there’s slightly less people out here. It’s still a good time though and the people are somehow even more rowdy out here and you wonder if it’s the fresh air.

You’ve danced, drank, laughed, talked, everything you could think of on a night out. It's been nice, especially doing it all with Lando, who somehow through the course of the night has undone more buttons on his shirt and you think he might as well just undo them all. It’s clearly getting late from how the crowd is slowly starting to thin out, but you two are still having a ball, and you figure you’ll stay till they kick you out.

Lando’s gone inside to get you both another drink, which he easily could have gotten from the bartender out here, but he claimed that the guy didn’t know what he was doing. While you wait you venture off to a far corner of the patio that’s somewhat empty. There’s a couple people sitting in chairs sharing a cigarette, but other than that you’re alone. Even in the dark the view is amazing and as you lean on the railing a nice breeze comes in off the water. It’s relaxing and nice, especially when you’re that sticky kind of sweaty and a little more drunk than you realize.

“Absolutely beautiful.” You jump at the unfamiliar, yet familiar voice. It had been a minute since you’d heard another British accent besides Lando’s. When you turn around to put a face to the voice you aren’t expecting to see such a gorgeous man standing there. He’s really the whole package– stunning blue eyes, pretty smile, fluffy light brown hair, nice facial hair.

“Uh- yeah it is.” You assumed he was talking about the view.

“Can I join you?”

He’s cute and you wouldn’t mind some company, so you tell him yes.

“Where’d your boyfriend run off to?” He asks as he nurses his Corona.

“He’s not my boyfriend, but I’m not wrong in assuming you know who he is, right?” This guy is in his twenties and British, if he didn’t know who Lando was then he had to be living under a rock.

He takes a swig of his beer before responding. “I know who he is.”

You scoff, there was a big possibility that he was using you to get to meet Lando, it was something you’d dealt with many times before. Guys showing interest in you only in hopes of becoming Lando’s friend or even worse girls who would befriend you only to try and get with Lando. You weren’t some step on the ladder that led to Lando, you were your own person with feelings and a life, who deserved to have people like you for you, not who you knew.

Maybe it’s the alcohol or maybe it’s the fact that you’re done being led on by people, but either way you confront the guy about it. “Are you using me to get to him?”

You hear him laugh a little and it lights a fire in you, but his words extinguish it before it gets out of control. “I was brave enough to come over here and willingly flirt with you before I even knew if he was your boyfriend or not. If I was trying to use you to get to him, I don’t think that would be a good plan. Which now that I know you’re not his girlfriend, kinda makes me think he’s an idiot. How could he have a girl like you in his life and not be madly in love with you?”

Your brain is fuzzy as you’re trying to process what he’s said. “Sorry wait- you were flirting with me?”

He’s got a cheeky grin on his face and he lets out a chuckle at your cluelessness. “When I said ‘absolutely beautiful’ I wasn’t talking about the view.”

“Oh.” You’d thought it was kind of weird for him to just randomly say that about the view, but for it to be aimed towards you was the last thing you had thought of. “Well, flirt all you want then.”

Not only did this place have one bartender that was incompetent, it seemed like all of them were. Lando had waited for what seemed like ages for a beer and a vodka cranberry. It wasn’t even that busy at the bar for it to be taking so long and at one point he contemplated just going behind the bar and doing it himself. By the time he finally got them he was surprised you hadn’t come looking for him, but when he made his way out onto the patio he saw exactly why you hadn’t.

Over in the corner Lando sees you doubled over laughing with some guy as he watches from afar. His grip on the glasses gets tighter as he sees you place your hand on the guy's arm. The tightness in his chest increases the longer he stands here and watches. It bothers him more than he cares to admit– to see you with some random guy. To hear that laugh of yours and him not being the source of it is driving him crazy. But what really sends him over the edge is when the guy tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear and without a second thought he’s storming over there.

Lando tries to play it cool as he approaches and he’s glad he’s got these drinks to use as an excuse. Your mid conversation when Lando interrupts, but he doesn’t care one bit. “Here’s your drink.” He says as he pushes the slightly watered down glass towards you.

“Oh thanks Lan.” You flash him a smile, but his face is emotionless and the fun light hearted atmosphere has suddenly turned awkward. For some reason you feel like you’ve been caught doing something you shouldn’t have. “Um, Lando this is-” You remember at that moment that you hadn’t even asked the guy his name, which to you makes this even more awkward.

“Harry.”

“Right. Lando, this is Harry.” You motion between the two men. “Harry, this is Lando.”

Harry extends a hand out to Lando and they very awkwardly shake hands. “Nice to meet you mate.”

Lando only nods his head at him before turning his focus back to you. “I think we should get going, they are gonna close soon.”

You think he’s joking, considering he’d waited all that time to get these drinks, and now he suddenly wants to leave. “I just got my drink, can we at least stay until I finish it?” It also feels rude to just abruptly leave in the middle of the conversation that you were enjoying with Harry. But Lando doesn’t know how to hide his emotions very well and by the look on his face you know he’s being serious.

“Well you can stay, but I’m leaving.” He knows he shouldn’t leave you alone with some guy you just met, but god he doesn’t think he can stand here and watch you flirt with him anymore than he already has. So, without hearing your response he starts making his way towards the exit.

A regretful look washes across your face as you look at Harry. “That was so rude of him, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what’s up with him, he never acts like that.” You take a big swig of your drink, fully knowing dealing with Lando is gonna be a pain. “It was really nice talking to you, but I better go hunt him down.”

He shrugs, clearly not as upset over this whole situation as Lando or you are. “No biggie, I’m sure we’ll see each other around. It’s a small place.” You bid him goodbye, but you don’t get very far before he’s hollering. “Can I at least get your Instagram?” Which has you coming back and quickly exchanging usernames before you're off again to find Lando.

You run into him in the bar and it looks like he was coming back out towards the patio. A look of relief washes over him when he sees you and he’s leading you away from the loud music and out the front exit before either of you can say anything. Only once the bass of the music is a faint sound in the distance does Lando speak up. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have left you alone with that guy. I was coming back in when you found me.”

“I appreciate you looking out for me, but you were kinda rude to him for no reason.”

Guess you were diving in head first with this.

Lando stops walking and turns to face you, a confused look on his face. “I wasn’t being rude.”

“Yes you were. We were having a conversation and you just butted in and demanded we leave. Not to mention you wouldn’t even speak to him. He was nice, you would have liked him if you gave him the time of day.”

“You barely know the guy, you talked to him for what ten-fifteen minutes? I just didn’t have a good feeling about him.”

You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his dumb excuse. He shook the guy's hand and didn’t get a good feeling about him? Bullshit. “Well if you didn’t have a good feeling about him then why’d you leave me with him?” He’d started to walk again, but stopped dead in his tracks at your words, spinning on his heel to face you once again.

“I already told you I regretted leaving you. I just had to get out of there for a second.”

“Why?” You were being adamant, your arms crossed across your chest as you waited for his answer.

He knew exactly why, but he couldn’t tell you that, he hadn’t even fully accepted it himself. “I don’t know Y/N.”

You’re getting frustrated with him and these damn heels that you chose to wear are not making your mood any better. “There’s a reason for everything, Lando. How would you like it if I acted like you did tonight with a girl you were talking to? You’d be livid.”

He completely ignores your accusation and turns the conversation in another direction. It had been itching at him to know if you were just being nice or if you were actually interested in the guy, so he plucked up the courage to ask. “So you were flirting with him?”

The look on your face is one of pure confusion, but your tone is nothing but shitty. “I’m not sure how you jumped to that conclusion from what I said or why it’s really any of your concern, but yeah it was just some harmless flirting. I’m sorry for having a little fun!” You were thankful that it was late enough for the street to be relatively empty, the last thing that needed to happen was pictures or a video getting out of you two arguing. You were sure there were already rumors about you two being on vacation together, you could only imagine how this would be misconstrued.

Hearing that his best friend was potentially interested in someone else had his head spinning and he could no longer blame his reactions on the alcohol. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore, ignore the way his heart raced when he looked at you. Or how he loved hearing that old lady call you his girl the other day.

It had been building up– festering almost this whole week and maybe subconsciously he wanted to go on this trip with you to see if there was some truth to what everyone had teased him about. He just didn’t think it would actually be true. Or that at two in the morning on a dimly lit street in Italy, during an argument, he would finally accept that he was in love with you.

But even with him realizing he’s in love with you, that doesn’t stop him from being an absolute idiot. “He was probably just using you to get to me.” Lando immediately regrets what he said as soon as it comes out of his mouth. He knows that's a sore subject for you and the look of hurt on your face makes his stomach churn.

“Now you’re just being mean.” You’re sure it’s a mixture of things that are contributing to the salty tears welling up in your eyes at the moment, but it’s Lando’s comment that actually makes them fall. You’re storming off before he can say anything, wishing you would have just stayed at the bar with Harry.

Lando knows he’s an idiot, but he also knows he’s the one who lit the match, which means he’s gotta be the one to put it out. “Y/N come on. I’m sorry. I know I shouldn’t have said that.” He catches up with you rather quickly, your heels slowing you down.

“Just leave me be Lando.”

“Y/N. Stop walking for just a minute.” He’s grabbing at your arm, trying to halt your movement.

You stop and face him and for what it’s worth he does look sorry, but that doesn’t change how you feel. “What? You want to poke fun at me some more?”

“No I-”

“You know I was just having a little harmless fun with that guy, like you said I talked to him for what? Fifteen minutes? Nothing was going to come out of it. But is it really that far-fetched of an idea for a guy to actually be interested in me just for me? Am I that undesirable and unlovable for it to seem like a reality? Or was he like everyone else who’s used me and threw me away as soon as they got their five minutes of the almighty Lando Norris experience?”

The tears that slide down your cheeks are a mixture of anger and embarrassment and maybe you were being a little dramatic. Perhaps the multiple drinks you’d consumed weren’t helping either, but when the person you care about the most says something like that, something you’d confided in him about, it hurts.

Lando feels his heart break to hear you talk about yourself like that. All he wants to do is to scream out that you’re not undesirable or unlovable. He’s wanted you and loved you for some time now, the moment it started he’s not sure, but he knows it didn’t happen overnight. It’s always been there– he was just too blind to see it.

He’s not entirely sure on how to make this right, he knows he was an ass, but he also knows he can’t take back what’s been said. The worst part is that he knows exactly how you feel and somehow he still thought that was a good thing to throw in your face– all because he was jealous. He could deal with people trying to use him, he’d developed a sixth sense for them and never let it get too far, but you were too kind. Your big heart and trusting of others had gotten you burned one too many times and it hurt Lando even more to know that all that had happened because of him.

“I should have never said that to you. I know first hand how it feels to have people use me and the only reason you’ve had to deal with that is because of me. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Your sniffles fill the night air as you try to calm yourself down. While people used you to get to Lando, at least they didn’t want to be your friend to leech off your fame. Use you for your money and generosity, expecting paddock passes and some lavish lifestyle. People saw Lando as an object rather than a person more times than not. While your feelings were valid and Lando was still an ass for saying that, you realized to be in his shoes was worse. So, you wipe away your tears and accept his apology indirectly. “Think we’ve only got each other at this point.”

His voice is soft as he approaches you, his hand reaching up to brush a stray piece of hair out of your face. “Don’t think I need anyone else but you.”

The tender moment has you turning to putty in his hands– the argument pushed to the back of your mind. His hand moves to cup your face and his tumb brushes gently across your cheek. You feel like time has frozen in this moment and for a split second you swear he looks at your lips, like he’s going to kiss you. The fact that this is your best friend is no concern to you at the moment. Then the moment between you two is ruined just as fast as it began, the sound of a very loud and drunk group of people leaving the bar up the street brings you both back to reality.

You back away from each other slowly, like you weren’t sure exactly what had just almost happened. You’d already resorted to blaming it on both of your emotions still running wild and the alcohol still coursing through your veins. The group of people are getting closer, their obnoxious singing getting louder as each second passes. They might not even know who Lando is, but you aren’t in the mood to wait around and find out, the last thing you want to deal with right now is drunk fans. “We’ve had too much to drink, my head and feet hurt. Let’s go home.” You grumble as you begin the trek home once again, your feet aching more and more with each step.

Lando stops for a moment and kicks off his shoes, he couldn’t let you walk in pain the whole way home. Especially after the pain he had caused moments ago. “Here put these on, your feet are killing you.” He hands you the white sneakers before squatting down in front of you to help you get your heels off.

Your feet already thank you as you slip on the oversized shoes that clomp on the stone street. And like a magnet you find yourself wrapping your arm around his as you walk down the street. You’re sure you two are a sight–you in shoes that are way too big and Lando only in socks as he holds your heels for you.

“You know you’re still an ass.” You tell him as you lean your head on his shoulder.

“I know.”

“You know you aren’t unloveable.” He hopes you know he’s being sincere, your words still replaying in his mind as you walk.

“I know.”

By the time you make it back to the villa you’re both exhausted. The alcohol, the argument, that moment between you two, the walk home– you were sure tomorrow morning would be a rough one. There aren’t many words spoken as you get ready for bed and as you slide under the covers next to Lando you can’t shake something from your mind from tonight, and it wasn’t the argument.

It was the fact that during the whole time you were chatting with Harry, you couldn’t help but compare him to Lando. There wasn’t the same sparkle in his eye like Lando, his smile wasn’t the same, his laugh. It seemed like everything that you noticed about this guy came second best to Lando. Sure you were having fun and he was nice, but not once had the thought of Lando slipped your mind. And even right now, with Lando next to you, you’re still somehow thinking about him.

It didn’t take long for Lando to fall asleep and you were on the verge of it when your phone went off on the nightstand. Usually, you would just ignore it, but something in you told you to see what it was.

harryinsta is now following you

You then see that he had sent you a DM and you’re expecting it to be about meeting up some time, which you were going to politely decline, but it’s quite the opposite.

harryintsa: i must have been mistaken earlier. lando's not an idiot.

yourinsta: huh?

harryinsta: he’s in love with you lol

Your heart nearly beats out of your chest as you read the message over and over again. Lando wasn’t in love with you, was he? Sure you’d heard it from just about everyone in your life that you two were in love with each other, but you always thought it was silly. You guys were just best friends is what you would always say, but to hear it come from a literal stranger was different.

You couldn’t lie that you hadn’t recently had your moments of perhaps thinking that he did, though you’d always talk yourself out of the idea. Although, if he was in love with you that may explain his behavior tonight. Or maybe it was just the alcohol like you’d originally thought. Then the tender moment you two shared entered your mind and suddenly the gears in your head are working overtime.

You locked your phone and sat it back down on the nightstand. Just from a simple DM you’d gone from being dead tired to now being wide awake– staring at the ceiling. You’re not sure how much time had passed as you laid there over analyzing every interaction with Lando. You were struggling enough trying to figure out the things you had recently felt about Lando, let alone the possibility that he was in love with you. All you knew for sure was that things weren’t the same between you two, you’d felt a shift when you were with him in Monaco before the Belgium GP. It had only amplified during this trip and you had a feeling that by the end of it things would be different.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

Two days later you’re sunbathing on a comfy lounger on the beach, while Lando’s out in the water doing god knows what. You’d given up on watching him a while ago, deciding instead to be productive and try to catch up to Lando’s tan level. Which, after laying here for some time now, it seemed impossible. That boy could be in the sun for a day and have a glowing tan– you not so much.

Moments later you think a cloud has passed in front of the sun, but when you feel cool water droplets on your hot skin you peek open one eye to find a wet and grinning Lando standing over you. “Hi.”

“Hi.” You greet him back as you sit up, your smile matching his. “Did you have fun out there?”

“I had a lot of fun and the water felt amazing. You should have got in.”

“I will later.” You notice he’s got one of his hands behind his back like he’s hiding something. “Lan, what have you got?” He tries to play dumb for a moment, trying to wind you up, but he eventually caves and pulls a plastic pail from behind his back. “Please don’t tell me you stole that from a kid.” Your half joking and half being serious, because where the hell did he get that from?

“I did not steal it from a kid– I borrowed it.” The smile on his face never falls as he continues to speak. “They had a bunch of them. I don't think they’ll miss it. Plus I needed something to put your present in.”

You cock an eyebrow at him, curiosity written all over your face. “My present?”

He’s smiling so hard as he sits down at the end of the lounger that you think this must be the best present in the world. Seconds later the pail is turned upside down and out falls the prettiest seashells. Your heart swells when you realize all that time he had spent out in the water he was looking for shells– for you. There’s a light pink one that catches your eye and Lando notices when you reach for it.

“Knew you’d like that one.”

Of course he knew that, sometimes you think he knows you better than you know yourself. “Can’t believe you spent all that time finding them.”

He shrugs like it’s an everyday thing. “I knew it would make you happy, which meant I enjoyed doing it. Really only took me so long because I wanted them all to be perfect for you.”

The sun beating down on you feels cold with how hard you’re blushing. “You’re my favorite person, you know that?”

Lando starts to get shy when you get sappy, like he hadn’t just said the sweetest thing a second ago. He’s smiling, but focuses on carefully putting the shells back into the pail. “You’re my favorite person too.”

A while later you decide to open up the umbrella between the two loungers. You had chosen to give up on the tanning lifestyle and instead dive into a new book. While Lando was fast asleep on the lounger next to you, apparently all that hunting for shells had worn him out.

You’d noticed out of the corner of your eye awhile ago that a little boy kept glancing over in your direction, specifically at Lando. You knew he had to have been a fan or he was the kid Lando stole the pail from. The nervous glances back and forth tell you that thankfully he’s a fan and you think it’s the cutest thing. You’re in the middle of considering waking Lando up so the boy could come over when you hear a groan that is undoubtedly Lando awaking from his slumber.

“What are you looking at?” He asks as he rubs his eyes.

You nod your head in the direction of the boy who’s just seen that Lando is awake and is practically bouncing with glee. “Think you may have a fan.”

A big grin spreads across Lando’s face as he sees the little boy. Lando loved meeting all his fans, but meeting the kids was his favorite. He thinks a big part of the reason he always makes sure to find time for the younger fans was because he was that kid once. Before he was ever F1 driver Lando Norris, he was just a kid who finally got the chance to meet their idol and he knows that picture or an autograph means the world to them

Lando motions for the boy to come over and he’s instantly tugging on his Mom’s shirt to get her to come with him. She gives you guys a questioning look and when Lando motions again they both come over.

The little boy’s Italian accent is the cutest thing ever as he greets you two and you can tell just how much it means to him to be talking to Lando.

“What’s your name?” Lando asks as he signs a beach towel of all things.

“Luca and I’m seven!”

“Seven is a great age. You know I started karting when I was seven!”

Luca’s eyes get as wide as saucers as he glances back at his Mom, who is already shutting down any talk of Luca karting. “I told you possibly next year. You’re still my little baby. I don't want you getting hurt!”

Lando gives the Mom an apologetic look. “How about a picture?” Which easily takes Luca’s attention away from karting, as he’s already at Lando’s side with a big smile on his face before his Mom has her phone out.

They take a couple pictures and high fives are exchanged throughout their interaction. The whole thing is very sweet and you can’t help but look on in adoration, fully knowing that Lando would make a great Father one day.

You see that Luca keeps looking over at you and then back to Lando, but you don’t pay that much mind to it. You figured he was just nervous or something, but what comes out of his mouth next takes you by surprise.

“Your girlfriend is very pretty.”

You feel your heart skip a beat and you glance over at Lando to see what his reaction is. You prepare yourself for the worst, but in true Lando fashion he’s all smiles. In fact he’s sporting that full face smile of his and it makes you feel funny.

“Thank you buddy, I think so too.” He looks over at you with nothing but love in his eyes and you’re immediately looking away like some shy school girl.

Thankfully, the Mom comes to your aid and quickly changes the subject. “Ok Luca, you’ve bothered them enough. We should get back to our spot. Thank them for their time.”

His cute little voice mutters out grazie as he gives you a small wave goodbye.

“It was very nice to meet you, Luca.” Lando bids him farewell and you both wave back at the little boy.

As soon as they’re gone you’re immediately shoving your face back into your book, you don’t even want to talk about what had just happened. It was nothing really to be so worked up over, it was just a little kid who saw two people together and assumed they were together. It happens all the time. But it is a big deal when you find yourself liking being referred to as Lando’s girlfriend. It doesn’t help when neither of you deny it and correct the person. Lando likes to play into it and you love it too much to say anything.

Ever since getting that DM the other night your mind had been in a whirlwind over how Lando felt about you and how you felt about him. Hell you can’t even look at him right now, you’re so in your head that you’ve been staring at the same page for the last five minutes. You just wished the book you were reading could tell you how to come to terms with the fact that you’re in love with your best friend.

It was something you’d realized the other night while you were awake overthinking everything. Those feelings had always been there, but you had just pushed them aside, ignoring every little butterfly or rapid heartbeat. When they actually turned into romantic feelings you have no clue because as far as you knew, you and Lando had always been like this.

You two just dove in head first into the co-dependent friendship that was more like a relationship lifestyle. All those times you’d gone to his parents house for family dinners and holidays, both of you attached at the hip. How he wanted to ask you to move to Monaco with him and then almost didn’t even move because he said he’d miss you too much. The group vacations that always ended up with you two going off and doing your own thing. The texts from him every Wednesday before a race asking if he needed to get you a paddock pass and a flight. This trip in particular– sleeping in the same bed when you don’t have to, the cuddling, the getting mistaken for a couple three times so far, the fact that it was just you two alone on the trip.

It was all there the whole time and you wondered how you could have been so blind to not realize it sooner. You were in love with him. You loved his pretty eyes and curls and the way his real laugh only seemed to come out around you. You loved his big heart and his caring nature and sometimes you thought he was too nice to be a Formula 1 driver.

You loved everything about him and truth be told it made your stomach hurt from how much you loved him. You wanted to actually be his and be able to kiss those pink lips that you sometimes found yourself staring at. When people said you were his girlfriend you wanted it to actually be true and not have it be Lando just playing along. You were so down bad that you prayed that Harry was right and that Lando was actually in love with you too.

While you were freaking out, so was Lando. When you immediately went back to reading your book and not speaking a word, he figured he had weirded you out by basically implying that you were his girlfriend. He just figured it was easier to go along with what the kid thought than explain that you weren’t his girlfriend, but god does he wish you were. He didn’t know what to say to try and test the waters because he knew whatever he would say would come out awkward and he didn’t want to make things worse. So, once again it’s not talked about and you two pretend that it didn’t happen when you finally speak again.

─── ༺❀༻ ───

It’s the last day of the trip and you’re dreading going back to reality and away from this little slice of heaven. The only thing you have to look forward to is the supposed fancy dinner that Lando had planned for tonight, which was what you were currently getting ready for. Music plays through your phone and you softly sing along as you do your makeup. When you look up after digging in your makeup bag you spot Lando in the mirror, leaning against the door frame behind you. Your eyes lower and you see that he’s holding two gift bags.

"Those better be for your Mom.” You state as you put the finishing touches on your makeup.

“I think we both know they aren’t.” He sees you roll your eyes in the mirror and it only makes him want to spoil you more. “It’s our last day, I think you deserve a parting gift.”

You turn to face him as he makes his way over to you. “I haven’t gotten you a single thing this whole time. It makes me feel bad.”

Lando only shakes his head at you. “You being here with me is the best gift you could have ever gotten me. I truly don’t need anything else.” He hands you the bags. “Now open them please.”

A small smile finds its way onto your face as you take the bags from him. You decide to open the bigger bag first and once you pull out the tissue paper you know exactly what it is. It’s still in its dust bag, but you see the branding and your jaw is dropping before you even see the actual thing. “You did not get me this bag Lando!” You exclaim as you remove the dust bag and see that it’s the same bag you were eyeing at the store the other day.

He shrugs like it’s no big deal. “Saw you eyeing it and knew I had to get it for you and before you say anything else open the other present.”

You set the handbag down and grab the smaller gift trying to figure out what else he could have possibly gotten you. When you open it and see the bracelet you were also looking at the other day you’re at a loss for words. “Lando Norris!” You could slap him, hug him, kiss him, and yell at him all at once. He’d dropped probably close to six grand on these two gifts and your head is spinning at the thought of it.

“Don’t even say anything about the price. I know you’re thinking it, but I wouldn’t have bought you them if I couldn’t afford it. I wanted you to have them, you deserve nice things.” You deserved a lot more than a handbag and a bracelet, but what he thought you deserved money couldn’t buy.

You know there's no use in fighting him on it, but you still feel bad that he just spends all this money on you. He takes the bracelet from the box and fastens it around your wrist, the diamonds glittering in the light as you move it around. It’s truly stunning and the handbag will go great with your outfit tonight. As soon as you two make eye contact again you’re pulling him into a bone crushing hug and you two stay like that for probably longer than necessary. “Thank you a million times Lan. I love them both so much.”

It’s time to leave for dinner shortly after that and when you arrive at the restaurant the host guides you back to a secluded corner. It’s a very romantic ambiance and you can’t help but feel like you’re on a date, which wouldn’t be a horrible thing. Moments later a waiter comes over with a bottle of champagne and two glasses. “It’s on the house– for the special couple.”

There it is again and it seems like with each time it happens it makes your heart race even more. Lando shifts in his seat and you focus on the rising bubbles in the glasses as the waiter pours the champagne. Lando tells him thank you and your attention moves to the menu.

“What are you thinking about getting?” You ask, ignoring the obvious.

“Probably the steak.” He grabs the flute of champagne and takes a drink. “What was that? The fourth time now?”

You know exactly what he’s talking about, but you’re surprised he’s decided to talk about it. “Yeah it was.” You set the menu down and grab the other flute. “Think I’ll get the steak too.”

Dinner actually turns out to be an amazing time. The food is decadent and Lando and you have good conversations that don’t revolve around you two being mistaken for a couple or being in love with each other. When the waiter brings the bill you’re quite sad because that just means this trip is that much closer to being over.

You take your time heading back to the villa, trying to savor every last moment you’ve got here. The sun was low in the sky by the time you get back and you tell Lando just how you want to spend your final evening in Italy. You hurry and change into comfier clothes and take off all your makeup before heading to the spot with the best view out back. Lando makes his way out there not too long after you, but he’s got one more surprise for you.

“Don’t think the evening or this trip would be complete without this now would it?” He pulls a bottle of pink moscato from behind his back along with two wine glasses.

He knew you too well, but it was something you loved dearly about him. “You’re a man after my heart Norris.”

He hands you a glass as he sits down next to you, the sun just beginning to set on the horizon. “I try.”

There’s a comfortable silence between you two for a while and the only sound to be heard is from the waves below. It feels like paradise sitting here with this amazing view and the guy you love next to you. It’s probably boring to the majority of people, but this was everything you could ask for and more and the perfect way to end this amazing trip. You lean in closer to Lando, your head resting on his shoulder as he wraps his arm around you. A content sigh escapes past your lips as his thumb starts to draw mindless circles on your arm.

“Thank you again for everything. This trip was amazing and I’m glad we got to go together– just you and me.”

“I’m glad too. It was probably the best summer break trip I’ve had. Don’t think Ibiza will be seeing me for a while.”

You’re not even looking at him, but you can sense the smile on his face and you can’t help but laugh at his lie. “Yeah, and I don’t like pink moscato.”

“Alright so Ibiza will inevitably see me, but not as much as Italy.” He pauses for a moment, glancing down at you still resting on his shoulder, his heart swelling just by looking at you. “I think this may be our place now, just for the two of us.” His voice is soft when he says it, like he’s not sure if he wanted to say it outloud.

You lift your head up and are met with his piercing blue eyes staring back at you. He looked radiant as golden hour cascades over him and it’s like you’re in a trance as you look at him. You take in every last bit of him, all the little details about him that you’ve memorized over the years. The slight stubble on his face from not shaving for a couple days, the little moles, his long and somehow always curled eyelashes, those pink lips of his. He’s everything you could have ever dreamed of and more. You’ve had him at fingertip length for so long now and all you want to do is reach out for him, take what you want and never let go.

Lando feels his breath catch in his throat as you two make eye contact. You’d never looked more beautiful than in this moment and he doesn’t know how much longer he can take without you actually being his. You were the love of his life, his best friend, and everything he’s ever wanted. It may have taken him a long time to realize it, but he’s never felt like this about anyone before. You know each other like the back of your hands and it only makes sense that you’d be the one for him.

And it’s in this moment that it clicks for you two that it’s now or never. You’re never going to have a perfect moment like this again. It feels right, like the universe wants this moment to happen and if you let it go to waste you may never get the chance again. Lando takes his free hand and gently cups your face, his thumb ever so softly rubbing across your cheek. You’re practically putty in his hands and you feel like your heart is gonna beat out of your chest. You want to scream out to him that you love him, that you want to be his, but you can barely get your brain to communicate with your mouth.

“Lan-”

That’s all you can get out before Lando’s leaning in and his lips are on yours. He tastes like the sugary sweet wine and his lips are soft as they move in sync with yours. Kissing him is even better than you’d imagined and as your hand reaches up to his neck you deepen the kiss. It feels like you two had kissed a thousand times before and as he pulls away you’re already left wanting more.

Your foreheads rest against each other, both of you breathless and a little light headed from that singular kiss. When you both actually internalize what’s just happened you’re both grinning, that then turns into laughing and it’s like music to both of your ears to hear each other laugh.

“I think that was a long time coming.” You state as you finally lean back onto the couch.

Lando reaches out for your hand, intertwining his with yours. “When did you realize?”

“That night when we got into that argument, which looking back now, you were totally jealous.”

“I was not jealous!” He tries to be serious, but the knowing look on your face has him cracking. “Ok I was jealous.”

“When did you realize?” You question.

“That same night. I couldn’t understand why you flirting with that guy bothered me so much. Well I guess now we know.”

“Yeah cause you’re in loooveee with me.” You’re laughing as you speak, but he shuts you up with another kiss and leaves you pouting when he pulls away.

“Only kissed you twice and you’re already pouting when I pull away? I think you’re in loooveee with me.”

You lean back in, capturing his lips in yet another kiss and you’re like teenagers who’ve gotten into their first relationship.

Lando sighs when you stop kissing him, he can’t believe he could have had this sooner if he would have just opened his eyes. “You think you could get another week off from work?”

You’d do anything to get another week in a paradise with him, but you know it’s not possible. “Hmm, why don’t you just spend a week in London with me?”

“Well you haven’t even told them that you now have a famous F1 driver boyfriend. Who if they didn’t know already is very needy and needs to see his girlfriend.” He teases.

“Well you forgot to add that you’re my hot and famous F1 driver boyfriend.” You counter back.

You’re both grinning like fools at each other and as you curl up into his side and take in the last sunset you’ll see in the place that now holds such a special place in both of your hearts, you’re glad you let him convince you to come on this trip.

As the sun finally sets over the water you actually say those three little words.

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”