#i do tell people im enby though

[aro-oats]

I feel a lot more connected with my aromantic label than I do my asexual label

not sure if it's cause I like the aro flag more (I love green so much) or if it's because I feel the romance aspect comes up a lot more than the sex

just wondering if anyone else feels this way with their labels

[hulahoopsoupgroup]

yes, the line between male and female is blurry. but have you considered that the cis/trans binary is also kind of blurry sometimes?

some think that if youre not a man, that automatically makes you a woman

some people think that if youre not cis, youre automatically trans/enby/anything that falls under that umbrella

what if im not either? am i just invalid because of that? because i cant fit myself into all these boxes? do i need to find a label just for the sake of explaining my gender to people?

i just say that im lesbian to anyone who asks, but even behind that, there are discrepencies, exceptions. i dont tell most people im aromantic because they most likely wouldnt understand.

do i just have to do that with my gender too, even though no label is fully accurate?

[lvrgirlrey]

requests....open yippie !!

my request is, the reader (im enby but, mind using she/her prns for the reader? :3) is crying, because she feels like her feelings dont matter, and the bsd men (jouno, tetchou, dazai and ranpo) try to comfort them, wanna try this prompt? :D

no pressure <<333

-K.

𝕒𝕦𝕥𝕙𝕠𝕣’𝕤 𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖: hi!! idk why but i love the way u typed this out, it just sounds so energetic, its so cute! you didnt specify if you wanted little stories or hcs so i just did the former >_< hope you enjoy!

𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕥𝕖𝕟𝕥 𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤: none this is just some angst and fluff

𝕛𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕠

you sat in the corner of your room, knees pulled up to your chest, trying your best to hold back the tears, but they slipped out anyway. it was like no matter how hard you tried, nothing you said ever got through to people. it felt like your words, your feelings, just floated away, unnoticed and unimportant. you wiped at your eyes, frustrated with yourself for crying, but the tears kept coming.

you didn’t even hear jouno come in. he was quiet as ever, his footsteps barely making a sound. he stood at the doorway for a moment, listening. he could hear the way your breath was unsteady, the way your heart raced. it wasn’t hard for him to figure out that something was wrong.

“why are you crying?” his voice was calm, though there was a slight edge of curiosity in it. he wasn’t the type to get emotional, but that didn’t mean he was completely heartless.

you quickly wiped at your face again, trying to hide the fact that you’d been crying. “it’s nothing,” you mumbled, not wanting to drag him into it. “just ignore me.”

jouno frowned slightly, his sharp senses picking up on the sadness in your voice. he stepped further into the room, his presence suddenly more noticeable to you. “if it was nothing, you wouldn’t be crying,” he said plainly, but not unkindly.

you shook your head, feeling embarrassed and small under his gaze. “i don’t want to talk about it. it’s stupid.”

he knelt down beside you, though he didn’t reach out to touch you just yet. “you say that, but it’s clearly bothering you,” he pointed out. “i might not be the best with these things, but i can tell something’s weighing on you.”

you hesitated, biting your lip. jouno wasn’t exactly the warmest person, and you weren’t sure how he’d react if you opened up. but something about the way he was sitting there, not pushing you but still staying close, made you feel like it was okay to talk.

“i just feel like… no one cares,” you admitted in a small voice. “like my feelings don’t matter. i try to explain things, but it’s like people don’t really listen. it’s like i don’t even exist sometimes.”

jouno was quiet for a moment, thinking over your words. then, slowly, he reached out and placed a hand on your shoulder, his touch surprisingly gentle. “your feelings do matter,” he said, his tone serious. “just because some people don’t listen doesn’t mean what you feel is meaningless. i might not be able to see your face, but i can hear your voice. and i’m listening.”

his words were simple, but they eased some of the tightness in your chest. you looked up at him, your tears slowing down. “really?” you asked, your voice still a little shaky. he nodded. “really. you’re not invisible to me.”

the reassurance in his voice brought you some comfort, and for the first time that night, you felt like maybe your feelings did matter to someone. jouno wasn’t always easy to read, but you could tell he meant what he said. it wasn’t much, but it was enough to make you feel a little less alone.

𝕥𝕖𝕥𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕦

you sat on the floor, your back against the wall, trying your best to keep quiet, but the tears wouldn’t stop. your chest felt heavy, weighed down by the growing feeling that your thoughts and emotions didn’t seem to matter to anyone. no matter how many times you tried to speak up, it felt like your words just went unheard, like they disappeared into thin air. you wiped at your face, hoping to pull yourself together, but it was hard.

the door creaked open, and tetchou stepped inside. he noticed you right away, his sharp eyes taking in the scene. you didn’t bother to look up; you didn’t want him to see you like this. but tetchou wasn’t the type to walk away when something was wrong.

he crossed the room, kneeling down beside you, his movements careful and deliberate. he didn’t say anything at first, but you could feel his presence next to you, solid and steady. “are you crying?” his voice was low, not pressing, but full of concern.

you shook your head, even though it was clear you were. “i’m fine,” you mumbled, trying to wipe away the tears with the sleeve of your shirt. “just… don’t worry about it.”

tetchou frowned slightly. he wasn’t the most expressive person, but he could tell when something was wrong, and he could feel that you weren’t okay. “you’re clearly not fine,” he said softly. “something’s bothering you.”

you swallowed hard, still avoiding his gaze. “it’s just… i don’t know. i feel like no one cares about what i’m feeling. like i’m just talking to myself sometimes. it doesn’t matter what i say, it’s like no one really listens.”

tetchou stayed silent for a moment, processing your words. he wasn’t great with emotions—he’d be the first to admit that. but he wasn’t going to leave you alone in this.

slowly, he reached out, his hand resting gently on your shoulder. his touch was warm, grounding. “i’m listening,” he said simply, but there was a seriousness to his voice that told you he meant it. “your feelings do matter. i care.”

his words made your chest tighten again, but this time, it was for a different reason. you weren’t used to someone being so direct, but also so kind in their honesty. you glanced up at him through your tears, surprised by the sincerity in his face.

“you care?” you asked, your voice soft, almost afraid to believe it.

tetchou nodded firmly. “of course i do. you’re important to me.” his grip on your shoulder tightened slightly, like he was making sure you understood. “your feelings are important. if something’s hurting you, i want to know.”

his words, while simple, brought a strange sense of calm over you. the tears slowed, and you felt a little lighter, as if the weight pressing down on you had lessened just a bit. you wiped your eyes again, this time feeling a little more in control of yourself.

“thank you,” you whispered, your voice shaky but sincere. “i guess i just needed to hear that.”

tetchou didn’t say anything else, but he stayed close, his hand never leaving your shoulder. and even though the silence filled the room, it wasn’t uncomfortable. it was a silence that told you that you weren’t alone, that even when you felt invisible, someone was there, ready to listen.

𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕡𝕠

you sat curled up on the couch, trying your best to hold back the tears, but they kept falling anyway. it was hard to explain exactly why you felt this way, but deep down, it came from the fact that no matter what you said or how hard you tried, your feelings seemed to go unnoticed by everyone around you. it was like no one really listened. you felt invisible, like you didn’t matter, and that thought weighed heavy on your chest.

as you sat there, lost in your sadness, you didn’t notice ranpo until he was standing right in front of you. he wasn’t one to miss details, and he could tell something was wrong right away. he might have been a bit careless with emotions sometimes, but this was different. he frowned, tilting his head slightly as he watched you wipe your tears away. “hey,” ranpo said softly, sitting down next to you. “why are you crying?”

you didn’t want to answer him. after all, it wasn’t like he could change anything. you just shrugged, trying to brush it off, but your voice cracked as you said, “it’s nothing.”

ranpo didn’t buy that for a second. he leaned back a little, crossing his arms as he watched you, his eyes sharp and observant, as usual. “it’s not nothing if you’re crying. so, what’s going on?”

you sighed, not really sure how to explain it. “i just feel like… no one listens. like, i try to talk about how i feel, but it’s like it doesn’t matter. i keep talking, but no one really hears me.”

ranpo was quiet for a moment, processing your words. then, with a small sigh of his own, he shifted closer to you. “i hear you,” he said softly, his tone much gentler than usual. “your feelings do matter, you know.”

you looked at him, surprised. ranpo wasn’t exactly the most emotional person, and hearing him speak so seriously was unexpected. you blinked away a few more tears, sniffling slightly. “you do?”

ranpo nodded, his usual confident smile returning a little. “of course i do. you’re important to me, and if something’s bothering you, then i want to know. you’re not invisible, even if it feels like that sometimes.”

his words made your chest feel a little lighter. it was strange, but comforting in its own way. you hadn’t expected ranpo to be the one to say something like that, but it meant more than you realized.

“thank you,” you whispered, wiping at your face again. he shrugged, giving you a small grin. “don’t mention it. just remember, if you need someone to listen, i’m here. even if i’m a genius, i still care.”

you smiled at his words, feeling a little better knowing that someone, especially ranpo, had noticed. even in his own way, he made sure you knew you weren’t alone.

𝕕𝕒𝕫𝕒𝕚

you sat on the edge of your bed, staring out the window as the rain fell softly against the glass. the world outside seemed so distant, and the tears rolling down your cheeks made it even harder to focus. it felt like everything was closing in on you. no matter how much you tried to talk about your feelings, it felt like no one truly listened. it was as if your thoughts and emotions just floated away, leaving you feeling empty and alone.

the door creaked open, and you turned to see dazai leaning against the frame, his usual playful grin fading when he saw your tear-streaked face. he stepped into the room, his eyes narrowing slightly with concern. “what’s wrong?” he asked, his voice soft and gentle, a tone you didn’t often hear from him.

you quickly wiped your face with your sleeve, not wanting to show him how upset you were. “it’s nothing, really,” you lied, trying to muster a smile. “i’m fine.”

dazai raised an eyebrow, clearly not believing you. he walked over and sat down next to you on the bed, the playful demeanor replaced by a more serious look. “you don’t look fine. come on, you can tell me.”

you hesitated, feeling a lump in your throat. “it’s just… i feel like my feelings don’t matter. like, no matter how hard i try to talk, it’s like no one hears me. it’s frustrating.”

he listened quietly, letting you pour out your thoughts. with each word, you felt a little lighter, but the tears kept coming. “i just want to be heard,” you said, your voice shaking. “i want to know that what i feel matters.”

dazai leaned closer, his expression softening. “you matter to me,” he said firmly. “your feelings are important. i may joke around a lot, but that doesn’t mean i don’t take you seriously.”

you looked at him, surprised by the sincerity in his eyes. “you really think so?”

“of course,” he replied, a gentle smile breaking through. “everyone has feelings. even if it seems like no one cares, that doesn’t mean they aren’t real. you are real. your feelings matter to me.”

he reached out, brushing a tear away from your cheek with his thumb. the touch was surprisingly comforting, and you felt your heart swell a little. “it’s okay to cry. it’s okay to feel sad. just know you don’t have to go through this alone.”

you nodded, the warmth of his words wrapping around you like a blanket. “thank you, dazai,” you whispered, your voice still shaky but a little stronger now. “it really helps to hear you say that.”

dazai grinned again, his usual charm returning. “anytime. just remember, if you ever feel down, you can always count on me. besides, someone has to keep you from getting too serious all the time.”

with that, you couldn’t help but chuckle through your tears. you realized that even in your darkest moments, dazai had a way of shining a little light, reminding you that you weren’t alone.

[randomshenaniganery]

Mairon to Finrod (info dump time)

I am going to draw Oleander when im not busy but I did want to show why it took me three days to finish up everything

Me diving into the outfit design and slso Finrod's opinion on the boys its in the bottom tho skksks

ALSO ALSO if u make vespersonas i will be friends pls let us lore dump together

real name: ??? I haven't picked one akskkaskskaskas

Age: 29 (they pretend they're older as Vigil)

Height: 5'7 cm

Gender: enby

Sexuality: Asexual biromantic

Weight: 73 kg

Traits: Street smart, scrappy, observant, liar liar pants on fire

Skills: Swimming, sewing, sword fighting (shield user), puzzle solving, running,

Weaknesses: when they don't want to do something they'll be stubborn about it, can't jump very high,

Backstory timeline:

Has had Fractum Anima for at least 2 months now (same as all Vespers)

In the surface their job was being part of a group of private guards, they mainly escorted people or goods

Ran away from home due to domestic abuse at the age of 12 before joining the guard for training

Worked there for 17 yrs before they got diagnosed and went under

Met Cirrus they were like okay weird but whatever if there's a lunar ichor alternative we gotta try that, saw Cirrus punishing that dude went nope try again later, they did try again later and got the Cirrus grew bored of you route with Ark

Set the pleasure den on fire by using the lotions and oils that were left in the room. Fun fact if you dry lotion on fabric it's VERY flammable and since they don't have synthetic fibers in this game, plus considering what kind of ingredients they'd be using for lubrication, lotions and oil; it's really easy to set things on fire.

After running away and grabbing a new face, they broke into their old room and left their medallion before returning as 'Finrod'

met Oleander while avoiding the guards because they were feeling antsy

became Vigil and is balancing new work, how do I kill Cirrus thoughts and I might need to steal lunar ichor when it pops up in the market.

Habits & hobbies:

Whenever Finrod gets too overwhelmed they use pain to calm their mind, to them pain is clarity. So, sometimes when Finrod stews on bad memories they'll end up harming themselves in some way to force themselves to calm down

Really, really quiet when it comes to pain, crying or having a crisis, high pain tolerance basically which is good because of their flare ups

Sometimes Finrod doesn't really laugh even though something is funny so they learned to fake laugh as a way to show they find something funny

Whenever something is really funny to them they have the habit of covering their mouth

When they're unsure, nervous or feeling awkward they'll scratch their nose

Doesn't have a tell when they're lying cause they do it so much

Finrod has the habit of bringing everything they think they need with them at all times (matchsticks/lighter/strike-a-light/flint, knife, scissors, needle and thread, bandages, map, a magnifying glass, paper and ink) this is because of having to live on the go for their job. scouting behavior etc.

When Finrod is happy/relaxed/calm they'll start humming or singing this applies to games, when they have their plan all finished and they're confident they'll start singing to themselves

In a fight Finrod will throw themselves at people like a battering ram if needed, not that they're big but that they're good at knowing how to use their momentum and weight.

Likes massaging/caressing/tracing their friends' hands as a way to soothe themselves

Can finish dressing up and arranging all their things in under 4 minutes (habit from being a private guard on the go)

Name stuff:

Chose Mairon for their first half because I thought it would be appropriate since this is their first go at the mountain. Finrod is their second go because of how Finrod died and the betrayal stuff that happened to him.

Outfit Design:

Mairon's Clothes

Wanted it to come off as simple and formal more reminiscent of their time as a private guard. The most color you'll get from them is their belt and matching cuffs. Very neat appearance more npc looking since they want to blend in. They use the standard black mask in the game as well.

Finrod's Clothes

I gave it more color because Finrod had to ditch their old clothes due to the fire, it's a mix of things they grabbed or bought after the fire. They kept their belt and cuff because it's sentimental and also just useful to them. Although they wear more colors It's mostly dark shades so that they don't stand out in shadows. A lot of their body is bandaged and when they met Oleander half their face was bandaged under the mask too.

Opinions on the boys:

REaLLy wants Cirrus dead doesn't care if they get hurt in the process

Slowly growing an obsession over Oleander but they're very good at hiding it, their banter helps calm them down

Likes to mess with Kier otherwise neutral but i think storywise they haven't met

Francesco reminds them of a friend from the surface they bump into each other time to time

[kawaiibarty]

UMMM if this is not an intrusive question, could you pls explain the process of you transitioning? Like whatever made you feel you were with the wrong body? And how did it bother you sm? This is plain curiosity. If u wish pls help me understand.

ahhhh hi hi it's not intrusive at all!

so for me it was really something that took time for me to understand because i didn't know that people were allowed to feel different yk

when i was a child i wore boys clothes because it made me feel happy, during playtime i called dibs on the boy characters, my avatars in video games were exclusively male.

i felt really uncomfortable wearing certain things like skirts and certain shirts and even different types of shoes. my mom said i was really picky and difficult about it lol.

for a while i sort of started wearing skirts and stuff, around 11 to 13 yrs old but, idk it was an odd period for me. i just wanted to be someone my mother liked yk. anyway, for most of my schooling id been in an all girls school up until gr7 when i moved cross country and schools. this new school was co-ed and it was really weird because i felt excluded a lot of the time because i wasn't...yk i didn't act like most of the girls and the people i thought id fit in with didn't like the way i did things LOL. i just felt alienated and like an imposter because i wasn't doing....girl right? iykwim

then i went to highschool a year later and i was shoved back into an all girls class for two years where i realised i properly like girls, except i thought i was homophobic because i didn't like the lesbian label or the bisexual label even though id tried out both at some point. it was like, i know i like girls and i haven't liked a guy properly but that doesn't make me lesbian because...but what if it does because im a girl, right? (spoiler alert, i do like guys and i realised that i could use the label queer without it being a slur also cue asexuality)

anyway, i was introduced to non-binary and it was a reaaaal relief. im telling you, once i was seen as something that wasn't an uncomfortable little girl it was good. but it still didn't feel right so i toyed around with androgyny except i didn't like how uncertain it made me feel yk?

im not saying that people who are enby or androgynous are wholly uncertain but i didn't want to feel like a poseur because i KNEW what i wanted but i didn't know if it was real.

i dont remember when this happened but somebody introduced me to he/they and they/he pronouns and i grasped onto that and it was okay for a while. still didn't feel like i was going it right because i had long hair and wore skirts and was still called a girl or non-binary and i hated my name and everything about the uncertainty yk? like it just came back out of nowhere

then one day this little boy comes up to me, i kid you not it's a CORE MEMORY for me, but this kid approaches me and he's like "are you a boy or a girl" and i start panicking because im not a girl and i hate being a girl and im not a boy because...i mean i don't even look like one right? so i ask him "what do you think i am?" and he says, without even thinking about "you look like a boy. i think you're a boy." and

yk, ive never smiled so wide in my life. i told him "yeah you're right" and he FISTBUMPS ME and im all giddy and excited and i text my best friend @d-rxse and im like OMGOMG YOULL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT HAPPENED DUDE anyway that was three years ago

then i got moved to a co-ed class

it kind of went to shit after that because as soon as i came out as trans i got a new boyfriend and he had never dated a trans person before so for a while he used he/they pronouns for me and we called each other boyfriends up until maybe april of last year where he told me he was uncomfortable with it

so i was an idiot and threw away all my progress and said "you can call me your gf and use they/them pronouns and she/her in front of your friends" and yeah 👍🏼 progress gone. down the drain.

i fixed it tho, by the end of last year i was so done with his bullshit, i broke up with him a week after school started this year, cut my hair short, changed my name, pronouns and got a new phone. cut him out of my life completely. ive never been happier

[cringefaecompilation]

I know it wasn't the focus of your misogyny post so if I'm overstepping please ignore me, but it also really makes me mad when people "conveniently forget" that Ashton is nonbinary, especially when it justifies their shitty opinions (ie he's One Of The Boys™ so he's always correct and can do no wrong thanks to his male-based intellect unlike the awful evil women or he's an Evil Manipulative Man™ who's going out of his way to use his male-ness to harm these poor innocent helpless women because he said/did anything negative towards them). Like please y'all, they're not a man PLEASE they said their pronouns IN THE FIRST EPISODE PLEASE. Feel free to like/dislike Ashton all you want cause that's perfectly fair, but for the love of god don't be transphobic (especially to be sexist) when you do it??? Is that too much to ask??? Idk if I'm making sense/getting upset at nothing because I've seen a lot of people dismiss this as being silly or getting mad at nothing, but idk as a masc enby a lot of discussions around Ashton feel so gross? Idk though, once again ignore if I'm overstepping or anything

you are not being silly and you are not getting mad at nothing or overstepping. it's a huge problem.

i've seen way more of the former where he is misgendered as a cis male as a positive trait, so i'll be talking more about that. will be reposting my tags about this trend in fandom because i've already said my piece on it.

ashton is "schrodinger's man" to these people when they're bored with ignoring/erasing orym's respect and care towards the women in his life. they're nonbinary and trans when they're being directly defended against fans who only like the women, and they're a cis male who is a victim of violent misandry when complaining about previous drama or shipping laudmo/ore (willing to give the benefit of the doubt that maybe some of that blending is them including cis male actor taliesin jaffe but then again). the idea that shardgate was Feminism Going Too Far is an actual statement that i've seen going around the fandom, and it's gotten worse now with swordgate.

didja know there are people insisting laudna should have been abandoned by the hells or fearne should have gotten "harsher punishment" when her dad nearly killed her because both women did something selfish/impulsive and ashton was yelled at and punished for doing something selfish/impulsive? the They Only Were Upset With Ashton Because He Is A Man argument is so fucking dumb. bro almost nuked himself without telling anybody else and was the only one not forcing the shard down fearne's throat, of course they'd come to blows. and you wanna know why they didn't scream at fearne or laudna? BECAUSE THEY LEARNED TO NOT DO THAT. THEY HAD A THERAPY SESSION SPECIFICALLY TO AVOID DOING THAT SHIT AGAIN

and it really does make it obnoxious because i like him and orym's dynamic but it's so fucking frustrating seeing people make them into bell's hells leaders and Voices Of Reason just so they can say "orym is always correct because dead husband and imogen is a salty selfish bitch" or "ashton is always correct because tough love & street smarts and imogen is just a salty selfish bitch" that it immediately sets off red flags for me if someone says those guys are their favorite bh characters. and it sucks because i love orym and ashton too!

obligatory "both sides though" mention: yes. there are im/odna shippers that fantasize about "punishing" or murdering ashton. they do that to dorian and orym too. i am aware of them and i have seen them. i have 90% of them blocked lmao

and i have also talked about this before but the amount of people i've seen insisting callowm/oore is a bad homophobic cishet ship that erases fearne's pansexuality is BIZARRE. this argument was used to prop up fearn/iture which makes no fucking sense to me since chetney is, as far as we know, cisgender. we might not know ashton's sexuality proper but it's safe to assume they aren't heterosexual as they've flirted with people of many genders. also there was this genuine debate if as/hrym was a homophobic ship because orym only dates men... and. well. i don't think it'd be the same as shipping keyleth with orym, let's put it that way lol

[pebiejeebies]

ISNT IT FUNNY? - Poll below.. read warnings please.

TW: Curse words, Full caps, Vent/Rant (I got very angry here.. sorry)

(If you are sensitive to the topic of LGBT, Alterhumanity, Vents/Rants, please do not read.)

Before you read, understand that most of what I say is an example, nothing more, nothing less. And I support and love Alterhumanity and LGBTQ+ equally, no more, no less. And If I worded something wrong, do tell!

Im glad to hear you two aren’t actually mad at me.. (Talking specifically to @chocolatespyro and @thelittleprinceconfirmed , but this is for everyone, don’t leave yet!)

I kinda feel like a little child or something— you know, for telling me I’m not wrong.. hah.. but eitherway thank you both for explaining what’s right and wrong, I “sorta” thought I did like a HUUGGGEE horrible thing so like I took a moment alone for a bit, then I came back to your very calm words.

I’m never used to people talking to me so.. nicely, (especially in a sensitive topic like this) that’s why I might fuck up and say I messed up even though I had the complete right to speak. (Which shows in my “apology” post, I literally deleted everything cause I thought it was a stupid idea to talk about)

Sigh, I guess since it’s fine from the both of you, I guess I can talk about it again. Honestly thank you for comforting me and such. I expected WAAAAAAYYYY worse.. (haha trauma go brrr) but yeah, back onto the topic.

(THIS IS THE START OF THE TOPIC IF UR UNINTERESTED IN WHAT I SAY FOR THEM <;3)

The topic (if you didn’t know) was basically about how people reacted towards LGBTQ+ and Alterhuman coming out situations..

(I think if you go to my profile and use #my polls you might find a broken and messy reblog of it, cause I deleted the text/poll aha..)

Let’s do an example, shall we? (NO HATE TOWARDS LGBT. JUST AN EXAMPLE)

We all love it when we hear the appreciation posts say: “Be who you are! Never hide your true colors! Show yourself to the world! Never be scared to shine!” And so on.. but why do I feel like it’s mostly aimed for humans (aka LGBT), not Alterhumans.. (IK THERE ARE APPRECIATION POSTS FOR THEM/GEN)

If an Enby came out to their parents, (like in America or a country that supports lgbt) there’s a good chance they’d be supported by their parents, or friends, or both! (WHICH IS VERY GOOD, DONT TAKE IT THE WRONG WAY!)

But alterhumanity has an issue with that, (Still in America or a country similar to it) if I ever said to my parents that I was a therian and a fictkin, they’d either laugh thinking I’m joking or smth, or they’d think I’m out of my religion for being an Alterhuman (WHICH IS COMPLETELY UNREALISTIC! SEARCH IT UP!) I researched so much for a good week or two, learning about therianthropy and fictkinity, and it doesn’t even affect your religion! Satanist? You can be a Alterhuman! Christian? You can still be Alterhuman! Etc etc..

It is an Identity, you identify as an Alterhuman, just like how you would identify as a part of the LGBT!

(Keep in mind that I know what LGBTQ+ people go through, and I’m so proud of them for fighting back all this horrible hate)

Back to the main issue, which was the “Coming out” issue. like I said earlier, if you came out as an enby you’d most likely get good treatment, like flags around pride month, and freedom of expression! (And Like hearing people use your pronouns, which probably feels so great <3)

Now let’s look at alterhumanity.. If I wore a tail or ears out in the public.. will I get the feeling of “Be who you are! Never hide your true self!” In those painful stares of disgust and shame? If I ever hissed “accidentally” in public, wouldn’t they just make fun of me? (Which.. sadly happened once.. never again.) and so on..

What’s my point you say?

LET. EVERY. CREATURE. EXPRESS. THEMSELVES.

Where is the equality everyone talks about?! Have you seen how much HATE VIDEOS of THERIANS, OTHERKINS, AND SUCH?! It’s RIDICULOUS.

It only infuriates me because you (not targeted dw) say “Be who you are! Never hide! Show yourself to the world” then go all “What the fuck are you wearing.. are you a cat boy?! Cringe asf..” or “You do know ur human right?” OR ONE OF THE MOST INFURIATING THINGS TO SAY TO US “You wanna get treated like wild animals? I’ll get my shotgun and hunt you down lolol”

Aaahhaha funny indeed! (I might be overthinking again, sorry)

You don’t see enbys (NOT TARGETED. ITS AN EXAMPLE) Get called “You know you’re human right?” Yet every day (not literally) I see a new post on therianthropy hate, mocking of them walking on all 4s or showing their beautiful howls/roars/meows/squaks.. etc etc.. (This sort of happens to furries as well, they are so misunderstood. </3)

It’s frustrating when I show myself to this world after they ASSURE me and TELL ME ITS FINE.

then all I get is a

mocking

stare

of

DISGUST.

even after they say “I’ll never judge you”

(Take a moment to breathe, and think about this so far, I don’t want you to get tired because of me, <3)

Sigh. I guess this accidentally turned into a vent/rant (since I was more comfortable talking about it.. makes sense I guess)

Now, the thing you (probably) came here for.. The Poll.

(Be a little more detailed in your opinion please and explain if ur talking to me or not/gen, and please reblog/nf so more people can vote/nfnfnf)

Thank you for voting/reading (I like looking at statistics, that’s why I made a poll btw.)

Here, have a cookie for being so patient!

🍪

[s0ckh3adstudios]

Haunted Hats #1: Co-Op

Welcome BACK to the Haunted Hats, my nonsensical A Hat In Time Swap AU based on the shift in fate that would happen if Hat Kid, Bow Kid, Mu, and Timmy were the Subcon Ghosts. Guess who's back in that mood~

Might take this similarily to how my buddy Bee presents the USAU characters: Character dedicated posts and short comics. I guess this is kind of Haunted Hats rebooted? I'll be taking this one area at a time!

But here's your favorite protagonist duo: Beta and Mask! Their Time Pieces, their fuel and important artifacts, have been scattered all over Earth... What will our... uh... heroes do?

(LOOK DOWN HERE FOR CHARACTER INFORMATION!!!)

Beta Kid / 14 years old / She/they/her/them Non-binary

Beta is a shy, mysterous young teen living above Earth's atmosphere, hiding from social interaction in her best friend's spaceship. Beta is a recluse, a shut-in. They try to avoid people other than Mask and stick to their job of time-related deeds. She is known as a Time Guardian, and has been one since she was young. How? Why? Where did this mysterious enby come from? Inhabitants of Earth might see them sometimes, but not for long. She's often in rifts fixing glitches or cracks in time, or wandering in between the coded fabric that makes up the space time continuum. Fixing time and protecting it.

They deal with heavy anxiety and are nervous around people, but you wouldn't be able to tell by how they interact with those they're close to. They've even got an irritated and passive-aggressive side, but Beta is usually very friendly and polite. She tries to be, at least. Beta also speaks via sign language. She has the ability to speak, though it's strained a bit, but otherwise very much prefers to use sign language. She can also speak Russian!

============

Mask Kid / 15 years old /He/him (but doesn't mind they/them) Demiboy

Mask (or Moon) is Beta's best friend and current ONLY friend. He's sort of like a brother figure to her, responsible and polite and better at talking with people (Though it's not a high bar to reach as he's equally bad with people as she is). Mask is kindhearted and intelligient, though memory is where he lacks. The years prior to meeting Beta he has no memories of. He woke up in his crashed spaceship with no memories, but the reflection of his permanently-masked face told him something was different. Mask hopes to regain his past, but he's happy to sit where he is with Beta in the present.

The mask he wears is... something Beta hasn't seen before. It seems to be something otherwordly, even acting on its own accord at rare moments. Strange abilities, magic red strings, a large pack of power... Mask has managed to control most of it, but sometimes... It's not Mask who is conscious.

.....But Im sure it's nothing to worry about!

============

That's all for now! Feel free to ask questions >:D

[bucketspammer4life]

☆ punch out sexuality headcanons ☆

im running out of funny things to say help me, also tw for mentions of homophobia & transphobia

Glass Joe

- aromantic asexual (sex neutral, romance positive) + trans, he/him

- Just because hes ace doesnt mean he doesnt make inappropriate jokes on a daily basis, if there was a ranking of who made the most sexual jokes he'd be at the top

- when he came out as trans to his parents they were suprisingly supportive even though they didnt understand much, it just went like: "mom, dad, im a boy and if you dont like that too bad" "we dont care as long as you dont murder anyone" And they were generally chill with him

- when he first binded he used bandages & cloth instead of a actual binder (before he came out) and due to that he almost wasnt able to get top surgery

- has faked a lot of crushes to fit in during his childhood, ended up dating 3-5 people he didnt even like

- thought his gender envy was attraction until he just asked himself "do i wanna be them or be with them" And boom, gender confusion

- fell down the "im not like other girls!" to "im not a girl." pipeline

Von Kaiser

- demiromantic, demisexual + bi with a preference for men, he/they

- when he didnt know the demi labels he just saw himself as a picky dater, when he saw the demi labels he was like "Wait thats me" And pretty much ascended on the spot

- thought everyone just liked both men & women until he said it out loud and got met with pure shock

- his first crush was a famous model he saw in a fashion magazine, also slipping down the "do i wanna be them or be with them" pipeline

- his dad wasnt really supportive but became a bit more open minded once he realized that his hatred distanced himself from his son even more

Disco Kid

- nonbinary,gay, he/she

- okay with both feminine & masculine terms

- somebody tried to call him "princess" to insult him when he was little, instead he took it as a compliment and saw them as a friend, still in contact with said person & theyre besties now, the princess thing has become a nickname for him

- when he first came out his parents were like "the closet was wide open" and were not suprised at all, they saw it coming 1000 miles away as soon as he started it out with the "i have to say something important"

- started doing make up & playing around with dresses thanks to a close friend of his (the childhood friend) , when he first put on a dress he was like "i think i realized something"

King Hippo

- #1 label hater + all pronouns

- if he were to use labels, he would count as gender apathetic and pan oriented aroace

- labels are for losers to him

- not out but his parents know that he doesnt give a shit about labels, they first found out when he didnt care about being called "queen" and liked it, they have no problem with it

Piston Hondo

- pan, cis (?) + he/him but likes to refer to himself with feminine pronouns in japanese

- not out to his parents but dropping hints, theyre struggling to pick up on it and hes going mad over it

- going through some major gender questioning™

- playing around with dresses & femininity and enjoying it

Great Tiger

- polysexual (prefs are enbies, men & genderqueer ppl), genderqueer + all pronouns

- closeted it but trying to make it clear hes not straight,its just flying over his parents head like "oh me oh my our son is sure close with his friends!! Such close bros"

- likes dresses not only for spinning skirts but also how comfy they are

Bear Hugger

- gay, bear (ITS IN THE NAME. COME ON THE CLOSET IS GLASS), trans + he/him but ok with they/them

- when he first came out there was a lot of crying, not in the "i wont accept this wahh" way but more in the "i cant believe you trusted me enough to tell me this" way

- didnt know he was trans until he said "yeah i like being called son, yeah i like being called manly, im a girl though" out loud and he was like "wait a minute"

- has had 2-3 boyfriends during his teen years and is still in touch with them since the break ups were done without any harsh feelings & grudges, hes the only person that can see his exes all chatting together and not die of a heart attack on the spot

Don Flamenco

- gay, trans + he/they

- got called gay way before he knew it since he kept calling his male friends handsome often, always passed it off like "cant a man call his friend handsome?"

- the only feminine terms he will accept is queen and aunt, refer to him as anything other than that and he will punch you to orbit

- cut off contact with his parents since they didnt accept him & kicked him out, the only person who took him in was his aunt, she helped him get t & bind safely before he got top surgery

Aran Ryan

- genderfluid, pomosexual + all pronouns

- label hater but still uses them because why not

- came out in the most casual way possible, was just chilling on the couch with his dad and he just said "i kinda like being called miss sometimes" from boredom just to see dad go "huh??"

- sometimes does drag when he feels fem

Soda Popinski

- gay, cis + he/him

- Rocky dating history, most break-ups of his were really sad since it was either forced by family members or over arguments

- exes with bald bull but they still get along & dont care about their past, they just had better platonic connection and decided together

- out but not, making it clear hes a bit fruity but not too much for it to snowball into "the rumour come out: does soda popinski is gay?"

Bald Bull

- Boyflux, gay + he/they

- flamboyantly gay and cannot hide it no matter how much he tries, the closet is not even present, show him someone he has a crush on and you'll hear the gayest squeal in your life before he evaporates into thin air and holds you at gunpoint

- has the Don Flamenco issue going for him, compliments his male friends and calls them handsome wayyy too often, this time its 99% more obvious

- either really bitter with his exes or close friends, no inbetween, if you tell him "yeah your exes asked about you, theyre there" theres a 50% chance its gonna have his soul physically exit him and another 50% chance hes gonna walk right over to them and say hi

- not out publicly since it would cause a shitstorm, only out to a few people he trusts, has issues trusting people to not say his secrets since a close friend of his outed him during his teen years

Super Macho Man

- bi (slight pref for women), cis + he/she

- didnt really come out, he just showed up to his parents door with his (now ex) bf and was like "heyy say hi to my boyfriend" and everyone just kinda accepted it

- thought the attraction to men was envy for a long time until he learned the fact that wanting to be lifted into the arms of a man and making out with said man is not really straight

Mr Sandman

- gendervoid, demiromantic, acespec, pan + all pronouns

- feels like he should be more masculine but cant bring himself to it,he cant force his behavior to act in a way that doesnt fit him

- out and about, hes not repressing himself for anyone

[psychiatricwarfare]

i lost my old post saying this so im saying it again.. ahem

NO TRANS PERSON IS MY ENEMY

i dont care if they're transmed/truscum/whatever you wanna call it. i dont care if they think me or my identity is cringe/wrong/a stain on the community. i was there once, i went down that pipeline for years, and it made me deeply unhappy and resentful of other trans people. you feel othered by cis people and retaliate against your trans siblings because you want to believe that cis people will accept you and they would accept you if it weren't for other trans people getting in the way - even though that's not the case.

by forcing transmeds to stay away from us and to 'DNI' all we're doing is pushing them further and further into the echo chamber telling them that they aren't good enough unless they perform transgenderism correctly. it gets exhausting, and you become bitter and angry. you don't understand why other people who are being their authentic selves seem so happy when you're not, and it makes you even more resentful.

the way i managed to crawl out of this pit was through youtubers like contrapoints' old videos about her own trans journey or philosophytube (who, though she had not come out to youtube at the time is and was still trans) making videos about transphobia. it was other trans people who helped me crawl out of this by simply explaining to me why it was okay to just do you. personally, it made me realise that before i had been pulled into this pipeline, i never identified as a "man." i was nonbinary before i was convinced enbies couldn't exist. and now im so much happier being able to be myself.

i want to extend that hand to any transmeds who maybe are starting to question the ideology or are simply tired of being so angry all the time. we are not your enemies, we are all a part of this community and no matter what we need to be there for each other. i can promise that when push comes to shove, transphobes are not going to care that you were trans the "right way", theyre still going to advocate for your death. trans people will be there for you, it'll be the trans community who protects you and stays by your side, and the person to pull you out of the fire might use neopronouns and have a weird gender but does that really matter when they want all of us dead regardless?

trans people are not my enemies. i don't care how much they've aligned themselves with transphobes, when it comes down to it, we have to protect each other. no person left behind.

[genderqueerdykes]

I’m a trans guy and I’m incredibly happy in my identity but…sometimes I remember what it was like identifying as a nonbinary lesbian and i kind of miss it?

Like it was so much easier when i was an enby lesbian. My dysphoria wasn’t as bad and everything fit into a neat little box.

At the same time though i was never really happy in any of my relationships and I didn’t really care about being alive because I didn’t feel like i had anything to live for

Did i make the right choice choosing to be a boy? I feel like i have something to live for now and im really happy but. I just feel like everything would be easier for everyone if i had just stayed as i was.

i really, really get what you're saying i do because that's LITERALLY where i'm at.

i was happy as a trans guy for a long time, but to me, after a while it felt like a prison, and more like something other people made me feel obligated into identifying as. i definitely don't know your situation so i don't want you to feel like it's the same for you, but for me, i was always pressured into being a man by others. i came out as "not a guy or a girl, just a person" to my mom and sister in 2011 and they said "so, youre a guy? okay if you're a guy then we'll treat you like a guy" and became. very toxic and mean and it made me feel like i had to try harder and harder to be a guy because. well, they were telling me i was one

my personal struggle has been with coming to realize i'm nonbinary and that i've been forced to identify as male by other people due to ignorance. for you, i'm just so sorry to hear that you know a similar pain of being happy and firmly rooted in an identity but not quite knowing what's right. i think for you, perhaps you could be bigender/multigender/polygender, genderfluid, genderqueer, or perhaps you have an identity like lesboy, boydyke, guydyke and so on. maybe you're feeling nostalgic for a sense of community that you no longer have, and it's okay to feel estranged and weird. maybe you really are happy being a guy, and it's okay to miss what you had in the past. it's alright to feel a lot of feelings

you may want to look into leslie feinberg's writings, particularly Stone Butch Blues, ze fit into a similar niche in life and had similar experiences to what where we fit in. you may want to check it out, just be warned that there are graphic depictions of sexual assault and police violence.

i don't think you made the wrong choice either way, people evolve and grow into themselves. you have to learn who you are, and it's okay if you chose a life that didn't fit you for a time, regardless of whichever identity doesn't fit. leslie tried living as a man for years and eventually went back to identifying as a lesbian. it happens for many of us, we have a complex relationship with life and gender, it's okay to not know, and to be confused. i hope you're able to figure it out, take care of yourself, i hope you find peace soon.

[neon-genesis-lesbiagaycock]

kinda controversial and weird take from a DEEPLY confused transmasc agender person !! pls tell me if im being insensitive or offensive towards anybody, the point of this is to try to understand things better

will address topics such as confusing gender shit, confusing sexuality stuff, talk about between-the-legs privates (kinda, just mentions), and other stuff like that !! so dont read if ure sensitive to all this.

(let it be said that i'm writing this in the middle of the night, so please excuse any grammatical or logical mistakes)

my question is, basically: why is sexuality based on gender? shouldn't it be based on genitalia or biological sex instead?

(TALKING ABOUT SEXUAL ATTRACTION, THOUGH ROMANTIC CAN BE INCLUDED)

to me, gender doesn't make sense. no matter how many different ways its explained in, i don't get it. mainly because its such a subjective thing, and the experience on it varies for everyone. i recognise that its important somehow in society and is an essential part of a lot of people's lives, but i just cant see it as something that is real. it's such an odd thing to have made up as a species (to my knowledge, no other animal has something like it), and it seems pointless to me. hella abstract concept. i dont like it. i also understand that there is a difference between gender identity, gender expression, pronouns, and many other things, which only makes it all the more difficult.

this all (especially the last point) makes sexuality very confusing to me, as i dont see how one can differentiate individuals based on qualities that aren't really defined at all. there are no guidelines on what being a woman, man, enby, or any other gender means, so how can you be sure that you are only attracted to certain (if any) gender/s at all?

say, for example, that you like only one gender (not talking about bio sex rn). you get to know someone that you find sexually appealing, only to later find out that they are of a gender (not sex) other than the one you are (usually) attracted to. i would assume that that would change how you think about your sexuality and not how you feel about that person. but then, that's a thing that can happen to anybody, which makes me think that there's no way anyone can truly be certain of their sexuality.

however, at least for me, genitals are not something that your "attraction" towards can change, or at least not so easily/simply. if ure disgusted by a type of privates then theres not much you can do about it, like how you cant exactly change whether you like a food or not. AND they're always there.

another example, this time shorter (simpler???): you know for sure you like pussy, and you know for sure you dont like cock (we're talking strictly sexual attraction rn, btw). gender wouldnt rlly matter in this situation, since a person of any can have any set of parts.

you get my point?

im not trying to start trouble or shit like that, i genuinely just dont understand. pls explain this to me !!!!

[oranaaa]

im kinda done with being perceived by strangers and even friends to an extent. everyone either sees me as a cis guy or trans woman so they always either call me masculine names or try to remind me how I’m not a real biological woman when I literally am. Like first your transphobia isn’t cute but secondly it’s literally wrong. I just feel so stupid all the time sitting here with the results that I wished for and yet I’m not happy with it. Like I did this to myself. And like yes I have a “deeper” understanding of myself and my gender bc I transitioned but at the cost of my self esteem and social abilities? Even around other queer people I don’t feel safe like I used to bc they see me as a transmasc person so they think it’s gender affirming to call me masculine names and I don’t want to tell them I don’t like that bc they’re all AFAB enby and I feel bad bc I have the exact gender presentation they want. I have that masculine androgyny but I don’t fucking want it. I’m tired of wearing padded bras because I got rid of my healthy body parts. And it being so obvious that it’s just padding. I’m tired of making my voice go higher but I end up getting he’d and sir’d anyway. It’s just so embarrassing. I hate having to wear makeup and skirts and throw glitter in peoples faces so they maybe might read me as a (trans)woman. Often times I feel like a transwoman. I don’t feel like a real woman even though I know I am. I’m fucking tired of it. I wish hormones and surgery weren’t treated as a necessary part of transition and people would just accept trans people as they are naturally. Why do we push the narrative that our bodies are wrong and must be changed? My body was perfectly healthy and now I have a chest that can no longer breastfeed, has no feeling, and is literally concave. Like ribs showing through my skin. I hate that I can’t stop thinking about the girl I could’ve been if I had just not medically transitioned. I could be the dopest masculine lesbian. But I’m not. I mean i am a masculine lesbian but again, most assume I’m AMAB when I’m fucking not. I did this to myself and I hate it. I will never be the person I want to be and it’s because of choices I made when I was a child.

[ridleyytheriddler]

im suuuper bored rn and in a mood to write so! rant! yay!

first thing i wanted to rant about - my sexual orientation (:

im ace, period. i know that for a fact. at least I'm somewhere on the spectrum, maybe demisexual? but I'm not sure, I'm not really diving into microlabels.

romantic orientation is an ENTIRELY different story...

had a crush on a boy in 3rd/4th grade, back when (i thought) i was a cishet girl. liked him until like 5th grade when my feelings sort of faded away. now, i was virtual schooled through 5th and 6th so i didn't really like anyone in sixth grade but i spent a lot of time exploring queerness in general- like my nonbinary awakening happened sometime in like January/February of 2022 (though i did first label myself as a demigirl, it still falls under the enby umbrella).

i entered seventh grade as a closeted aroace enby and went through about 3/4 of the year without any major crushes (i had a platonic interest in a boy that i misinterpreted as a crush). i didn't really label my romantic attraction because i didn't need to.

however, as the end of the school year approached, i started feeling uncomfortable. i wanted to know who i was, and the only valid part of my identity had been my asexuality, since i knew that i liked a boy in the past so how could i be aro? i was drowning in a whirlpool of invalidation and not feeling queer enough.

so, i go to the first camp of the year, a writing camp, filled with TONS of queer people. i loved it there, but seeing so many people around me, sure of their identities, made me die more inside.

sooo, a couple days after i was accused of flirting with my friend (who happened to be a boy), i "discovered" i liked a girl. she was pretty, she was smart, she was blonde, she was sporty. i texted her a lot (even after camp was over). i put hearts around her contact name. but "liking" her didn't feel thrilling and it didn't feel happy. to put it simply, it felt like a fucking punishment. talking to her made me feel like i wasn't enough.

so after going through about a month of emotional turmoil and dying inside and bragging to my friends about how i liked a girl, i headed to my first sleepaway camp of the summer, a church camp, ironically enough. and THERE. THERE i fell. not in love, but probably the realest crush i'd had. there weren't really butterflies, so to speak, but if you looked at a picture with the two of us in it, you would see me gazing at her (lets call her M) with literal heart eyes. we'd started quietly chatting while our mutual friends were off doing other stuff, and ended up bonding with each other despite how the only thing we shared was our introverted-ness. and I'm not even that introverted. we're polar opposites. we still text each other almost every day, and i had hopes she liked me back, aaaaaaaaand she doesn't but. here comes part two of my rant.

my crush doesn't like me.

and i don't even feel the tiniest bit sad about it.

this is probably the most confused i've ever been. i know i like her. maybe it's because her "rejection" was so soft it didn't even feel like one. i don't know. it's complicated, but my best friend had been cheering me on to tell her, so i did. and i was honestly divided as to whether she liked me or not- at times she acted like she did but other times she didn't. honestly, i think I'm just hopeful that she likes me

anyway thats not the point-

so. after writing this THERAPUTIC post, i have discovered that:

i am aroace and proud 🧡💛🤍🩵💙

im nonbinary (and proud, but I've known that for a while)

I'm confused

but I'm 100% queer. whether I'm lesbian or straight or bi or something, i am queer! and I'm tired of feeling invalidated by being compared to the people out there who are out and proud with all their labels. i don't need to be exactly like them to be queer and be myself.

to put it poetically, "our friendship is worth more than being in any relationship." I'm going to write a poem about that now. good night yall <3 or even good morning/afternoon.

[cwcthzl]

okay for some reason, talking about my date feels less vulnerable on here than on discord. probably the anonymity even though i know im not really anonymous. so. random little things from my date with farmer enby:

- they told me that they tried on like half of their clothes before landing on the outfit they wore. which is just- 1. i didn’t know that was a thing people who dress masc even do. 2. makes me think they wanted to look nice to see me so i’m gonna scream into my pillow

- this was my first time seeing them wear makeup and they looked really cute with it!! also i feel like they’re better at makeup than me which seems unfair

- i was worried that because we were going to a cafe, the date was gonna be pretty short but i didn’t get home until 4 hours after we met up (and they drove me home)

- they are a really good driver and they even offered to help me practice driving. when i told them im working toward my license, they started telling me everything they were doing when driving so i could learn

- their special interest is hippos and we went into this like hobby store and when there were animal things, they told me to look for hippos. and we’re about to leave and we see all these animal figures and there’s a hippo. so i tell them if the hippo is less than ten dollars, ill buy it for them. and they tell me that if i buy them the hippo, they’ll kiss me. and rasc, i would have spent my whole bank account on that hippo when they said that

- they talked a lot about their little cousin, who they live with, and it was so cute seeing how much they love him and care for him. which already knew but still. they’re probably going to go as a pokemon trainer for halloween because he’s making them

- i mentioned i never do anything for halloween anymore and they brought up the idea of me coming to take their cousin trick or treating. i hope that happens.

- i am so gay. like. so so gay. they are so cute im gonna cry

- we talked about when we realized we were queer and first crushes and all that and they kept making me laugh and i just

- and then when they drove me home and dropped me off, i did get that kiss. it was a short peck but it was my first kiss in a year so im just. ahh!!

anyway, i really hope they actually like me romantically because i like them so much. but even if they don’t want to continue romantically, i really like being their friend so. yeah

- deb

you are such a pussy i actually feel bad for you

- ?????THAT IS LITERALLY FUCKHNG FLIRTING HELLO I SAY THAT SHIT TO EVERY ONE OF MY TALKING STAGES WHEN I WANT TGEM TO KNOW I WANNA LOOK GOOD FOR THEM

- im not surprised i am pretty sure even i (ME) am better at makeup than you

- god coffee dates.... such dykes

- DAMN

- one of the lamest gay flirting tactics ive ever seen oh my god get yourselves fucking dignity

- AHADJAGXJ

- dont get your hopes up chat but it will be SO cute uf it really happens

- ew

- i'm pretty you have a lame ass sense of humor so. i feel bad for them. god knows what made your dwarf ass laugh

- LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO

dude if you really end up being just friends you will probably kill yourself bc of all that one sided/flirty friends/general fuckass situation from liking your friend so we PRAY that doesn't happen

[genderwip]

oversharing again - dysphoria , infantilisation , hints of misogyny if u look for it , idk

this week I have been being more open with everyone about my dysphoria , I talk to a couple of close people about it often but I usually avoid talking to others about it since as Ive been realising , whats the point in becoming vunerable about dysphoria only for people to clearly not care ?? because as a nonbinary transmasc my dysphoria cant be that bad right ?? I can just be a feminine enby and get placed into the "girl nonbinary" category right ????? people dont take me seriously at all ,, maybe because it took me longer to figure my dysphoria out than other people ? i've been identifying as trans since I was 13 ,, its nothing new and I wish people would just please stop infantilising me and making me question it , its definitely worse because im also autistic and people really seem to infantilise autistic transmascs for some reason ( its transphobia and ableism ) . its killing me everyday knowing that everyone sees me as a woman . I see people talk about how its easier to be transmasc because you're gaining power from patriarchy or something but ever since opening up about just how uncomfortable I feel with my agab and cis people realising I actually want to transition they don't take me as seriously as when I was fem presenting , I can tell they just see me as a silly girl .

I wore a binder in school today in the first time in a while , mostly because it really does impact my comfort throughout the day , and I have back pain and general discomfort in school anyways but the binder really does make it worse ,, I felt more dysphoric seeing my reflection in all the glass in the buildings and still looking like a girl even though I can barely breathe . I just dont know what the point was , it just made me feel othered from everyone and I couldnt concentrate on anything because I was so concerned trying to hold my binder so I couldnt feel my chest hurting constantly . idk if im just noticing it more but ever since starting to present more androgynously ( I consider it masc for me tho since before I was hyperfem ) , I get misgendered way more and again just feel like im not taken as seriously . at this point I feel like I should give up and become hyperfem again because at least I can pretend that im just doing dress up and that people are only misgendering me because im playing a fem character and not that people genuinely see me as a girl .