#i do my best to foster my existing friendships

[escapades-to-rivendell]

hey siri how do I stop the constant feelings of isolation and loneliness from tearing my heart open every day?

[lakesbian]

rachel and alec are specifically interesting to me re the undersider Situations as of early worm posting. thats right for the first time in my life im saying rachel specifically is interesting to me. everyone on the team is at least a bit lonely i think but it's so loud and obvious with rachel, because she's loud and obvious about everything. she's a disabled teen who's been homeless since she was very young. she was deeply abused by the foster home system, and the legal system responded to her wounded and confused outbursts as an autistic child by criminalizing her and hunting her down. she can't exist in public without the cops being called. society has done everything to demonstrate that it doesn't want her, and then blames her when she doesn't trust people.

brian says that the undersiders are the closest thing she can have to friends. alec says that they're the closest thing she has to a family. (which is an entire can of worms in itself wrt alec's relation to the undersiders.) and both of those things are true, but there's also something so tragic in their assumption that their tenuous connection w/ rachel where she can only just barely tolerate them is the best she can ever have. they're the only people she can even remotely trust to have her back or treat her somewhat fairly instead of fucking her over, but they're still fundamentally considering her beyond close connection, less of a friend or someone to attempt befriending and more of someone to keep on a leash. of course taylor is the only one to actually get close to her--taylor is the only one who tries to engage with her, as a person, on rachel's own terms, instead of begrudgingly tolerating her. rachel :(

& alec is the other team member who's in the Extra Lonely Isolation Club...he gets silly with the team sometimes, he has his little teenage banter w/ brian, he and lisa are clearly very familiar with each other in the way ppl who've been living together for a year and a half are. it's really good for him. it's the first time in his entire life he's gotten to have a consistent home with his own belongings, and he's getting to have it because he's part of the undersiders. the undersiders are literally the first people in his entire life that approach counting as a friendship. he gets SO FUCKING MAD!!! when he leaps to assuming that rachel stole the money from them. he gets So Mad he immediately goes "i vote we kill her" and then goes on a seething rant about how he wouldn't have thought she'd do that since the undersiders are the closest she has to family, but apparently she would. and the projection is so obvious! he's not wrong about applying the sentiment to rachel, but there's a reason he goes farther than brian's "closest she has to friends" and into the more intimate territory of "closest she has to family"--the two-way street there means that the undersiders are the closest he has to family, and the idea of being betrayed by one of them hurts enough to trigger the aggression he always displays when he's feeling vulnerable.

and he still doesn't tell them Jack Shit. he obviously lies to them all the fucking time, because brian is under the impression that he "dropped out" of school, when the reality is that he never went. even lisa brings up heartbreaker to taylor without any awareness that he's the father of the boy she's been living with for over a year. alec spends most of the early arcs in worm in dissociative, depressed fugues. the other undersiders have lengthy conversations where they're sharing personal info and he's just trailing along behind them, not speaking for so long that even the readers can forget he's there. lonely broken little shell of a boy who is so empty all of the time and does not even know it. aisha cannot get here fast enough if i have to see him being depressed and disconnected for one (1) more chapter i will explode

[office-anomaly]

What are some of your favorite dynamics between characters?

this will be a long answer, because the gang's group dynamics is one of my favorite things to talk about. please bear with me haha (before anything: these views are purely my own. i know others have differing ideas for character/ship dynamics, and whatever i put here does not intend to challenge or demean any preference different from mine 🥺 our opinions can exist together lol) READ UNDER THE CUT

fred and velma: they are my gold standard for friendship. i think this dynamic is severely underrated as they are not only hilarious together, but they complement each other so well in terms of affirming each other's passion for mystery-solving, all the while keeping each other in check in case things get crazy. they strike me as the ideal friendship where the bond is meaningful, grounded and platonically intimate. one of the reasons why i like BCSD so much is that it showed just how well fred and velma work together in a way we haven't really seen in previous shows. ftr i think this is my favorite sub-group of the gang. velma and daphne (vaphne): i really like this ship, although i rank it behind varcie (i don't think i'll talk about varcie here since this might end up several pages long lol). this ship has been around forever, and i do think that it has a very good reason to exist mainly because of how the girls are such a positive presence in each other's lives. we've seen how daph has tried to get velma to come out of her shell on many occasions, and has shown that she understands her in a way that the boys will never do. meanwhile, velma acts as an anchor for daphne, keeping her on track when she gets overly excited or kooky during cases. i've always loved how different they are in all aspects, yet are able to foster a mutually beneficial relationship with each other. fred and daphne (fraphne): i know this is a basic ship, but i like how this has evolved over time, across many scooby media. SDMI really did this ship so much service by adding the much needed depth and justification why their dynamic works as well as it should. fred added a sense of adventure to daphne's otherwise sheltered life, and daphne has a good understanding of how to navigate fred's personality and quirks (much like how she is with velma). the show allowed these characters to play off each other and show us how they each deal with relationships that took a backseat in favor of mystery-solving in earlier iterations. daphne and shaggy (and scooby): ok these guys are FUN. like so much fun. i like that this was the group configuration for 13 ghosts, as i think their personalities lent so much entertainment to the idea of dealing with real supernatural phenomena (side note, but i like how the lego beach bash movie basically confirmed that they were the fun members of the gang lol). while i personally do not see shaggy and daphne as romantic partners, i totally understand why some people ship them and that's perfectly fine. velma and scooby: a girl and her canine best friend. whenever i draw velma and scooby in one picture, i make sure to show that they are the best of besties as much as i can. i am not subtle with my agenda to undo the optics damage SDMI did to these two lol

thanks for reading til the end, i know it's long. let me know if you have comments, violent reactions or anything, i'd be happy to discuss 😊

[gillyweedgrl]

You should be watching Pit Babe! - A Brief Review

Saddens me to think how many people are missing out on a great show because they think it’s not worth more than a trash watch, if that.

I mean, realistically, is it the most amazing cinematic work of all time? No, not unless pretty-boy power bottoms with daddy issues are your thing, which in my case they are, so let's talk about Pit Babe!

Note: I've tried to keep the spoilers to a minimum, they're mainly in the tags and links so follow them at your own risk, you've been warned.

Honestly, Pit Babe is a pretty damn good show, especially if you A) pretend the Omegaverse factor doesn’t exist and take the show for what it is and B) you don't mind not knowing what's going on half the time, just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride.

Overall, Pit Babe has got a good production value, a slightly absurd yet entertaining plot, a great choice of cast with amazing chemistry and pretty decent acting skills amongst the mix of seasoned actors and newbies.

For a totally biased fair and balanced review: There are some details that are left vague instead of being explained in depth or at all (yet), but that’s to be expected when you adapt a novel into a movie or series. It would get boring for the audience if the pace was interrupted to explain all those little details that we’re likely to find out along the way anyways (shout out to those who've watched the latest episode; finally!).

There are also some scenes that feel like they’re not as necessary and some background/plot devices that made a little more sense in the novel but I personally don’t feel like they detract too much from my viewing experience.

Babe (played by Pavel) and Charlie (played by Pooh) as the main leads do a really good job at shouldering a large percentage of screen time. Charlie comes across as happy-go-lucky, a bit clumsy/goofy, entirely fearless and a little naive, which is mostly true, but there's clearly more to him than that. Right from the start Babe is clearly someone guarded, detirmined and skilled at what he does (racing cars and having sex) and he has a very tight cirlce of people he trusts. There's a winning combo right there, quite tsundere/sunshine from the outside but definitely more breath the surface that gets exploded as they go.

Way (played by Nut) is Babe's best friend and racing companion, they've been racing together at Team X-Hunter for years but there's clearly more than friendship on the mind for Way, though the feelings appear to be one sided.

Alan (played by Sailub) is the owner of Team X-Hunter and an all-round cool Uncle (which the whole team call's him (despite barely being in his mid 30's). He's kind but firm, he cares for his team like they’re his family and it does seem as though they’re his only family.

And the rest of the cast consists primarily of:

Team X-Hunter:

Dean (played by Lee); a junior racer with slight douche vibes

North and Sonic (played by Michael and TopTen); everyone’s babies, they’re junior racers and content creators

Jeff (played by Pon); the newest member of the team, he’s a part time mechanic and full time conspicuous

Pete (played by Ping); the money guy Alan brings on board to sponsor the team

Team Red Racing (the rival team):

Winner (played by Pop); the guy who never seems to win against Babe

Kim (played by Benz); the new racer they hired to beat Babe

Tony (played by S Vorarit); Red Racing's newest benefactor and *shock horror* Babe's former foster father (try saying that ten times fast)

Kenta (played by Garfield); Tony's right hand man

Then, there’s the 🌶🔥🤯

I, personally, enjoy a little spice/heat in my shows. It’s not necessary for every show, of course, but I do think that when it serves a purpose to the story and it’s done well then it can be quite enjoyable and this cast/production team is doing it really well.

As I said, the chemistry between the cast really is amazing (both on and off the screen, if you're interested in that kind of thing) and although the spicy scenes aren’t nearly as abundant as they are in the novel, there are some really good ones. I decided to bite the bullet and binge read the novel over the past couple of weeks, I blame @pharawee’s breakdown posts for those sleepless nights, and it was worth it for me but not necessary for watching the series.

Lastly (as if this post isn't long winded enough as it is) there are a handful of things in this series that we don't see too often in BL's and make it worth watching even more:

It's got race cars, murder attempts, mafia influence and supernatural powers (at least half the characters have one).

There's no evil ex-lover out to get revenge or get back together with one of the mains (thank the BL gods).

It's got a Soft Top/Dominant Bottom dynamic where the title character is both super masc and a pretty princess.

And we can't forget, it is technically an Omegaverse series (or rather, it's Omegaverse-lite) which none of us saw coming!

Anywho, to conclude; yes, you should be watching Pit Babe. No, you don't have to read the novel to understand what's going on because none of us understand what the hell is going on at any given time. Charlie and Babe are fucking around and finding out, the rest of us are just long for the ride, Alan and Jeff are having a whole ass rom-com-drama in the corner, the babies are making their content and having a blast and the others aren't quite on the map yet (or are they? *wink, wink*), but I sure hope they will be soon!

If you made it this far, thank you and are you okay? Do you need to have your brain checked?

[box-architecture]

Plantrio group chat.

ok I'm going to be really abnormal for a hot minute here but its not my fault I was reminded that Mystic Messenger exists so, fun silly AU under the cut.

Ok so I'm giggling over the concept of a DSMP AU Mystic Messenger style. You're a recent minecraft player who has come to the DSMP, (or maybe you can select a character like Technoblade, shhh this is a crack concept) and you're in a chat group with the other characters involved in The Plan, like Punz and Ranboo (full memories) as someone who is on Dream's Side and is working for Dream

Listen To Me. Listen. Dating Sim the hell out of Dream. It would be so stupid. Listen to me.

you have to respond to text messages at various hours of the day over the course of 14 days, making choices that will decide how the story will go, and how your relationship with Dream will develop. You can encourage or discourage events of exile, the building of the prison, you can side with Dream in arguments in the group chat over the best way to handle certain actions or choose to push against him in others.

You can literally have conversations with Dream at 2 in the morning because Dream doesn't sleep and both talk quietly about how things have changed since the start of the server, listen to him reminisce about Sapnap and George even as he insists it was for the best that they don't talk anymore.

You could also potentially build negative or positive relationships with Punz and Ranboo, which will affect how they respond to you and later decisions in the story. Like if you're going for an ending where Dream doesn't put himself in prison, you have to have high affinity with both characters so they'll side with you against this idea

And you also get private conversations with them as well to foster this. listen 14 days is a lot of time I'm sure plenty can be squeezed in

but in the five seconds since thinking about this silly idea, there's a list of characters you can be

Like, if you choose to be a Random MC, you'd get a sort of pre- selected backstory and could make it up as you go along with how you got into this Plan situation with the trio

But I think it would be really, really fun if you could choose to be Technoblade

Like for whatever reason Techno accidentally gets access to The Plan Group Chat, and after a days worth of conversations, he's allowed to stay in the chat

and he gets Significantly different conversations than from Random MC

but also you can be Hannah, who comes to the DSMP a lot earlier than in canon, or Tina, and they also get different conversations, because they're different characters

and the same bare bones of the route happen, but its still Them and the texting is Them

And that might be too ambitious for an actual game but listen this is likely something that's not going to be actually made so instead Listen. Listen To The Benefits of Silly

But also please consider that you could get The Worst Endings Possible through actively encouraging Dream's self sacrificing behavior, reassuring him that he's making the right decisions all the time, ignoring when other characters bring up concerns

Consider the difference between Supporting Dream and Encouraging Dream. I'm shaking you

Consider having late night convos with Punz as he privately expresses worry for Dream, as he admits that sometimes he wonders if there's any point in The Plan or in even caring about the people of the smp. Consider Ranboo opening up about how fucked up it is to only remember who he is half the time, and the personal guilt he feels about deceiving Tubbo, but how despite his guilt he's still choosing to do this

I know I've mentioned this was for the express purpose of kissing Dream and that its a dating sim but my primary goal is no longer about Dream getting kissed its about giving him friendship

however he probably should still get kissed

but MOST IMPORTANTLY

ITS ABOUT THE WHOLE IDEA THAT IF DREAM HAD LITERALLY JUST. ANY SOLID SUPPORT. THE PRISON AND SO MUCH BULLSHIT WOULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED

Ranboo isn't himself half the time and Punz believes murder is always the solution they dont count

Pacifist Route. Toxic Route. Befriend people make enemies interact with characters. listen to me.

[krystaldeath]

Cotl Auuuuu

It’s modern time babeyyyy

* This au does take place in modern day but it technically “starts” in the late 90s bc it’s a Narinder and Lamb were childhood best friends au :))

* I honestly have the most ideas for when they’re in high school but I’ll get to that in a bit (also should say this was inspired by that one prom post from redcrowncafe where Lamb talks about their prom date who was an asshole and wishes they knew Narinder then so they could’ve gone with each other. Saw that and thought “okay but what if they did” and that spiraled out of control)

* I’ve yet to say that my personal headcanon for Lamb’s family is that they had two moms, and three younger siblings (a sister about 12 years younger, and 18 years younger twins; one male one amab gender-fluid). The twins don’t show up till Lamb is, well, 18 tho so they won’t come up much yet

* The Bishops (Bishop is just their last name here) are all foster siblings who have shitty foster parents. Shamura stays even a bit into their early 20s because of this since they don’t want to leave their younger siblings alone with those two. The foster parents’ were abusive in multiple ways, and they also kept any money the Bishop’s respective parents might’ve left for their offspring to themselves (spoiler: Shamura’s in particular were LOADED and so when the Bishops are finally away from these two they’re pretty much set for life). It’s after a particularly scary night where a two year old Leshy and a six year old Heket are threatened while Shamura and the parents are arguing that something in Shamura snaps and they begin to plan to murder their foster parents. Yay!

* I don’t have the details but they in fact /do/ kill them. Thing is they’re super smart about it and hardly any evidence can be traced back to them. It is a small town though so there aren’t too many suspects and overall the one who would have the motive and probable method would be Shamura (unless they wanna try and pin it of 13 year old Kallamar or 8 year old Narinder). Thing is, their foster parents? No one liked them. So no one’s gonna point fingers. The police try and press people to give a suspect but no one does. So the case goes cold. But, even though no one liked the two, murder is still frowned upon by most so the siblings move away.

* But BEFORE all that let me explain a bit about Nari and Lamb’s friendship: they met in kindergarten (idk why they’re in the same grade when I hc Lamb to be a year older but shhh) and while Narinder tried to act “cool” and “aloof” Lamb was having none of it and dragged him along on little kid adventures like playing in the mud and pretending to be power rangers. Also almost from the get go Nari had a little crush on Lamb lol. Since Nari and his sibs move away when he’s 8, these two knew each other for 3 years. Idk what all happens in that time. Like I said most of what I’ve thought up for this au (mainly about Narilamb) happens in their high school years. It is thanks to their play dates at each others houses that Lamb figures out that being nonbinary is a thing from Shamura and is like “Wait… Me too???”

* After the move, Nari and Lamb stay connected through letters and phone calls. They also send pictures of all kinds of things, mainly of themselves so the other “won’t forget what I look like!” Neither make many lasting friends, at least, not ones around the same age as them (Lamb befriends Ratau and his buddies. Narinder befriends kind library assistant Forneus and her two twin sons).

* Lamb is loud and proud about who they are, which unfortunately makes them targeted for bullying, though it’s not just for their gender, it’s also because of their - Idk a better word than quirky Sorry - personality and the rumors about their long distance best friend; there’s multiple rumors, like that he doesn’t exist (this comes from those who don’t know much about the whole Bishop family scandal) or that he’s a murderer, just like his older sibling (this comes from those that /do/ know, ofc)

* Btw over the course of these years they’ve been apart Nari’s crush has only grown and Lamb has also gained a crush on Nari themself

* OKAY OKAY OKAY OKAY TIME FOR THE BIT I HAVE THE MOST OF AN IDEA FOR GET READY (it’s super cheesy and corny and honestly feels like a Disney channel original movie but this fandom could use a little more of that imo so let me live)

* So, I know some schools would let Juniors have their own prom. Let’s say Lamb’s school does that. They had been asked by some guy to be his prom date and figured “why not?” and accepted. Thing is the guy asked if they could buy his ticket, and being the nice person (yet to decide if this is also a human au or if they’re still all animals) they are they do so. The guy then just takes the ticket and tells them to get lost. Lamb didn’t like the guy but it still hurt to have their kindness taken advantage of. They tell Narinder all about it and admit they probably won’t even go to the prom, even though they already bought a ticket and outfit. Nari, who Lamb can’t see bc it’s just a phone call, is absolutely SEETHING.

* Now Narinder has a mission: Get a tux, flowers, and other gifts. Convince Shamura to let him go in his truck (yeah he drives a truck in this au, idk it’s just the car I imagined when I thought it up lol) and be away from home for a few of days (it would take about a day to drive there, then he’d want to stay for at least one or two, then another to drive back). Shamura is reluctant (that town holds a lot of bad memories and him being so far away when he’s only 16 is scary), but seeing the determination in his eyes makes them relent.

* He calls Lamb’s moms and lets them know his plan, but wants it to be a surprise. They both agree to convince them to go to prom even if they will be going alone, without letting it slip that they will have a prom date after all.

* Prom night comes around, and Lamb, who is dressed in a tux-dress combo, is confused as to why their moms, who were so insistent that they go, aren’t ready to take them? (Projecting my reluctance to learn to drive onto them here, so that’s why they can’t drive themself). Then the doorbell rings. They answer and see Narinder (who is now like a foot taller wow couldn’t tell that in the photos he sent) in a tuxedo holding a bouquet and corsage. He’s got a nervous smile on his face as he says “I know it’s a little last minute, but will you allow me to accompany you to prom?”

* Almost a full minute passes in silence, making Nari sweat and begin to regret doing all of this. Then he gets jumped by Lamb into a hug that topples them both to the ground as they scream “YES!!!”. Thankfully they aren’t hurt and their formal wear is alright, though they wouldn’t notice otherwise, their focuses only on each other’s laughter and presence.

* When he opens the passenger door for them there’s a basket of treats, jewelry and a black cat plushie. “Ohh, Narinderrrr! You’re making me feel like I’m royalty!” “You are, to me.” *pause as they look at each other in flustered silence* “A-ANYWAYS WERE SHOULD GET GOING RIGHT?” “OH YEAH YOURE RIGHT. Uh, help me up?” He helps them climb into their seat, close the door, and silently screams about how dumb that was (while Lamb is inside internally screams about how sweet that was and oh no they think they’re falling for him)

* They get there (Yeah I realized Nari doesn’t have a ticket but let’s say somehow there was enough for him to buy one at the entrance) and they’re having a good time (only barely noticing the looks they’re getting and the whispers of “Isn’t that one of the Bishop siblings? Figures Lamb would have to settle for a murderer to be their date.”), dancing, eating and drinking the possibly spiked punch. I’m sorry to say some hurt is about to happen

* They have a run in with the guy who tricked Lamb and Nari almost breaks the guys nose before Lamb pulls him away saying it’s not worth it. He’s about to disagree and say something embarrassing again like “maybe /he’s/ not worth it but /you/ are and he hurt you so he deserves to be punched” when a girl “accidentally” spills her whole cup of punch onto Lamb’s outfit. Everyone around them laughs and Lamb, barely blinking back tears, runs out of the building. Narinder growls at them all and runs after Lamb.

* He finds them curled up by a tree outside, and sits down next to them. He tries to comfort them but they sob out “Just take me back home.” He agrees to do so, but tells them to go wash up a bit in the bathroom while he gets something. As they’re washing up he knocks on the door and asks to come in. They let him and see he’s holding a box. He tells them he planned on giving it to them later after Prom for something else he had planned but figured they’d just go now since Lamb didn’t want to stay anymore. He hands it to them and says he’ll be waiting outside.

* Surprise! It’s another outfit :)) It’s a bit more cozy than what they were wearing before, but still fit for “royalty”. And a black crown with a big red jewel inlaid in the middle-front

* They get dressed and marvel in the mirror before going back out. Narinder’s heart skips a beat when he sees them.

* Idk what to put in between so let’s skip ahead to when they’ve arrived at a spot out in the open wilderness where it’s easier to star gaze. He sets up the trunk bed to be comfy and reveals he had a cooler and basket of food for them to have a night picnic under the stars.

* After they’ve eaten some, one thing leads to another, and then Lamb pulls Narinder into a kiss. They both confess and spend the rest of their time cuddling (until Lamb gets a phone call from their very nervous moms because of how late it’s getting and they’re not home yet lol)

* I have more ideas but to sum them up for now: The rest of this AU is just Narilamb long distance relationship angst & fluff. Eventually the Bishops move back to the small town and then it’s not long distance narilamb (and eventual leshycat and whatever else).

* I will say this: Another murder will happen, this time it’s Lamb who commits it. That’s all I’m giving y’all ;))c

[fairykukla]

Have we lost the ability to throw a drink in someone's face? Have we lost the ability to say, "I don't think so, bud" or "No, thank you" or, "This vibe is rancid, I'm going to leave"?

There was an incident at a party recently, where an older man was being friendly with a nonbinary person young enough to be his child. And when I say, "Friendly" I mean that he was being flirty and getting into their space.

Some of the breakdown in communication was that the younger person, being nervous and uncomfortable, responded with smiles and giggling. I'm not blaming the victim, here; the older man really should not have been trying to foster intimacy with a person that young, someone in a relationship with the child of his best friend. *This was not cool.*

But I worry that these youngsters aren't being taught the art of saying no, clearly and concisely. It's a really important skill. When a pushy salesman tries to bulldoze you, you need to know how and when to put down a hard stop. When a friend tries to get you to do something that you think is dangerous or just hits you with a Bad Vibe, you need to know how to say "No" in a way that doesn't nuke the friendship. (You also need to know when to nuke the friendship, but that's another story for another time.)

Creeps exist, folks. People we don't expect to be creepy will pull creepy stunts. People we do expect to be creeps will meet our expectations. Sometimes you see the creep coming, sometimes you don't see it until the behaviour occurs. And creeps can be any gender! I've met some spectacular female creeps! But it does seem to infect the Cisgender male population more intensely.

And for all you know, this might be Dudebro's first, bashful foray into using creepy pick up strategies he read on some disgusting reddit thread.

You have an opportunity to stop Dudebro right here. At the very least, you need to alert the other person to the fact that you are uncomfortable.

1. You don't owe creeps anything. Even if it's someone you know, you still don't owe the creep anything.

2. Don't feed the creep. If this person creeps on you, anything that encourages the creep just makes the creeping stronger.

3. Calling out creepy behaviour doesn't mean destroying a relationship. Just like calling out a racist comment, a transphobic attitude or ableism, it's absolutely possible to tell someone that they need to check their behaviour from a position of love and respect.

4. Your boundaries are important. This includes personal space, conversational boundaries, and physical boundaries.

5. In order for your boundaries to be respected, you absolutely HAVE to express them, clearly and unambiguously.

6. High pressure sales tactics basically boil down to straight up trickery. It's about hacking into a person's head to manipulate them into doing something they don't actually want to do. Educate yourself about sales tactics, please please please. These tactics are used by con artists, salespeople, recruiters, and guys looking to score.

Here's a thought exercise: There's a person out there who loves to be touched by strangers, is delighted by threatening jokes, and really does want a potential partner to be very pushy. That's a super rare person, but imagine that the Creep's only social experience is with this person. You have to be clear about your boundaries and never assume that your needs are obvious or "normal." None of your needs are unreasonable, but they are unique to you.

So:

DB: (Creeps on you.)

You: No, thank you.

DB: I just wanted to talk to you

You: You're in my personal space. Please leave me alone.

DB: Well, that's rude.

You: No, you're being rude. I didn't invite you to talk to me. Please don't be a creep.

DB: You're being a bitch!

You: (to friends, the bartender, the bouncer, to any other potential ally in the room) Excuse me, this guy's being a real creep, can you help me out?

This is a scary situation, for sure. You can be brave, and you can express yourself clearly, and you can pull in allies if you need them. Here's another:

Creep: You know, you're really mature for your age.

You: Oh, that's the trauma.

Creep: trauma? What happened to you? Can you talk about it with me?

You: when guys creep on me it makes me have to act very mature for my age. It's because they're being really immature and I have to compensate for it.

Creep: That sounds really tough.

You: I saw this in an old movie once. This super mature woman threw a drink in the face of this guy who was being really creepy to her.

Creep: Wait. You mean me? I'm not a creep.

You: Yeah, actually you are. Can you please give me my personal space back?

I know what you're thinking. You're worried that things will escalate quickly into violence or threats, right? The important clue I have for you here is to get out early, get out often, don't let someone corner you or separate you from your support structures. If you identify someone as being a threat early on, and say so to the people around you, it's less likely for the creep to morph into an asshole.

So what if it's your friend? If you witness creepy behaviour in one of your friends, it's ok to call them out on it. "Hey, watch it, you're getting a little bit creepy there." Friends don't let friends get creepy! Don't wait until it becomes a big problem!

So here's the TL:DR

Dealing with creeps 101:

Step 1: stop smiling. Don't offer any encouragement.

Step 2: establish boundaries. (You're too close, I wasn't talking to you, I'm here with my friends, I have work to do.)

Step 3: involve assistance. (Ask your friends, an adult in the room, security personnel, etc.)

[blubushie]

I’m a trans dude, and while I’m still in the closet for now, I want to go on T, and I don’t want to,look like a twink, I wanna look like a well and truly traditionally masc dude, and I feel like my friends just don’t get that. They don’t understand why someone would want to look like that. I worry so much for the community and friends I’ll lose when I do go on T. People are so terrible to men and other folks not willing to overplay femininity in queer spaces, it just makes me anxious.

My best suggestion is hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Try to keep fostering your connections with your mates but also mentally prepare yourself for them drifting when you transition.

Also recognise that if they don't accept you or your masculinity, then they aren't actually your friends. Friends support each other especially in major milestones like coming out and transitioning to the person you want to be. If your straight friend says they care about you but treat your queer partner like shit, or do that whole "I have nothing against gay people I just wish they'd be quieter about it" thing, then they don't actually care about you. If your friend says they support you in transition, but ask why you "have to do that" in a judging way, or try to convince you not to do something for your transition (like go on T cuz it'll make you "ugly" or something), then they aren't your friend. They care about their biases more than they care about you, and that's not friendship. They should be supporting you, not criticising and hindering you at every turn.

As for queer spaces—yeah, they don't like us. And I'll be honest, you might lose people. Hell, it's even likely you will. I'll say as much that there's a reason I don't call myself queer and it's not just because of how that word's been used against me, but also because of how it's been used to describe me for simply existing as a bisexual/gay intersex man, and despite the queer community so desperately wanting to claim me by words, they never do so by action. They have made it well and clear that they are not my community because of how they ostracise me for being too masculine, or looking too male, or how they either fetishise me for being intersex or blatantly ignore that very prominent aspect of my personhood. Until things change I do not consider myself a queer man or part of the queer community. You cannot lay out a welcome mat and then shun me when I walk in.

I know this is easier for me than it might be for you, especially if you're already present in queer spaces but not out as trans. I'm wishing you strength and luck, anon.

[generallyunskilled]

I think the biggest thing that’s sort of dragging modern fandom down is the constant desire to be a “good fandom” and focusing on the fandom as a whole and the actions of internet randoms. And I get it, it fucking sucks when you’re having a good time with something and you see shit like gross fanart, inappropriate ships and dumb toxic infighting. It really is disappointing when you see people acting this way, and not wanting to see that is pretty natural response.

I think however, this makes people really self conscious because they sort of see every person in a fandom as representing that fandom as a whole. So when a fandom is particularly icky, they feel bad for being in it, even if they’re a good person and not doing anything wrong. Because they fear they’ll be seen as guilty by association. Here’s the thing. There are no normal fandoms, just some are weirder than others and sometimes that edges into being bad weird. But you need to kill the idea that a bad fandom makes you personally look bad. You need to know that you, yourself are a good person and the actions of others do not reflect onto you.

You need to cultivate your experience. Block creeps. Block assholes. Block tags for the objectionable shit you don’t want to see. You need to quarantine that stuff away from your experience, because that is the best you can do. Awful shit has existed in fandom since its dawn and the solution is to push them into corners where they can’t be seen and never engage, even to refute. Block. On. Sight. This goes for literally everything from people being gross/creepy/inappropriate to people being rude/assholes to just “I don’t really want to see this person”. People who are into weird shit are not going to change their minds because people are arguing with them, especially when they know people object to it. You can’t crusade against every grody or problematic thing in fandom, it is a losing battle. It sucks but it is true. Block them, let your friends know or whatever and keep finding the things you like. You need to pay weridos no mind and just tell yourself that the only person that matters in your fandom experience is you. Only what you do matters and is a reflection on yourself. And you know what is right and wrong.

In my personal experience, fandom is best experienced not by interacting with it as a whole EVER. The best thing you can do is narrow it down into a sort of micro-fandom. Find the ships you like, the story arcs you enjoy, your favorite characters and stick to what you know. Make a handful of friends in these spaces. Interact with them and only them with some exceptions. The rest? Not your concern. Isn’t about you.

And most of all, I cannot stress this enough, you cannot be shaken by others disapproval. Some people are going to think you’re a freak for even engaging in fandom at all, even if they look and see that you’re not a particularly crazy person. Passion is cringe to some people. That is them failing to assess you, and not you failing to meet their assessments. You have to know that them going “ew, you’re in *insert fandom*” and presuming things about you is on them, and not you. Someone judging you based on others actions is not worth your time. Someone who does not take the time to see who you really are and makes snap judgements based on only the worst of the worst is a presumptive asshole. You cannot ever make a presumptive asshole like you without killing a part of yourself. Do not do that. The people who will judge you for you will come. And that is where you foster growth and friendship.

[bettsfic]

Hi betts! Do you have any advice on how to brand/share your writing content if you want to create community or meet other writers, or make your writing brand known? I love your works 💞💞 and i love the way you don't separate between fic and og fiction!

hello anon! so, i think there are actually two different questions here. how to create community and meet other writers, and how to grow a writing brand. the reason i see these as two separate things is because branding is inherently for the purpose of building an audience, and i have learned the hard way that being a writer with an audience =/= having a community. i think that's almost always true of original fiction, and true of fanfiction at a certain terminal velocity of traffic. having a handful of readers comment on each chapter as you post? community, definitely. a fic with 10k kudos? that might seem impressive, but it's just a number. you can't make friends with a number.

we'll start with branding.

the importance of branding is dependent on what you intend to publish and how. if you write a novel and publish it with a big 5 imprint, your brand/platform/following is irrelevant. i've heard this question asked to over a dozen agents and acquisitions editors, and the answer is the same: nobody cares. what matters is the work.

if you're a journalist pitching to big outlets like the atlantic, the new yorker, etc., then branding/platforms/general networking is expected. if you intend to write a book of nonfiction, you absolutely need a following, because that lends credence to your authority on a given subject.

small and indie presses, having a brand/platform helps to sell copies, but that's not going to be a factor in accepting your book. moreover, a lot of small/indie presses are nonprofits, and what's more important to them is lending *their* branding to *your* work.

self-publishing definitely requires a following i think, but i don't know as much about that.

tl;dr most traditional publishing exists to support your work. sure, a lot of it is about what can sell, but at the end of the day, the people helping you get your book into the world are, simply put, book nerds, and what matters most to them is that they want to champion your work.

let's move on to community.

as a writer, the best way to meet other writers is by attending workshops, conferences, and residencies. i still very much love and advocate for the creative writing MFA, where you'll be with a cohort of other writers who will become your lifelong friends. in these spaces nobody expects you to have a brand. they just want you to be yourself. i guess that's what i love so much about writing--generally the more earnest you are, the more friends you make.

to *create* community is a different beast. the best thing you can do is make a writing group of a handful of people and meet every month to talk about your work. that's the thing about community--once it reaches a certain size, it becomes an audience. you only ever need a few writing buddies who are invested in your work to get what may seem like the benefits of a wide audience. i would always rather have my five nice commenters on my WIP than to have a million hits.

if you're just starting out, an audience or a following might seem really important. it's not. what's important is fostering a few good friendships, feeling supported by them, and supporting their work in turn. if you do that, the entire idea of an audience begins to bleed away. it's an afterthought. the love and joy is in the work itself, and when the work is finished, if some people decide to read it, cool. if you then want to publish, what matters is your ability to advocate for yourself, and the kindness and enthusiasm you offer to the people you encounter along the way.

i'm sorry if this wasn't the answer you were looking for. i know it's antithetical to everything modern society teaches us, but truly, what's always most important is what makes you happy and honors your ideals. almost always, for nearly every human on this earth, the truth is that people find the most joy in creating things and making friends. you can forget everything else.

tl;dr you don't need nearly as much as you think you do. one good short story will open a lot of doors for you. one good book will open more. one well-tended account on one social media platform will find you some ways to meet new people and keep you updated on the news of your genre. and one good friend will help you feel seen and understood, and give you the courage and motivation to create your best work.

[tarotcardaddict]

hi  !  excited  to  get  this  show  on  the  road,  i'm  paczki  and  i  use  they/them pronouns  and  am  excited  to  introduce  my  original  queen.  some  headcanons  can  be  found  under  the  cut  along  with  some  wanted  connections.  please  hit  the  little  heart  button  if  you're  interested  in  plotting  and  i'll  make  my  way  to  you  !

HEADCANONS

after spending four years of her life with a man named lars, amy had broken up with him due to the amount of crap that she's had to put up with. this hadn't exactly been the easiest since he manages to sweet talk his way back into a relationship with her. at the moment they are broken up.

over the years she has became really big into using tarot cards and even collecting crystals. this has became a huge source of comfort to her.

when she isn't traveling around the world or isn't working, she is still very, very active in voluntarily helping out at animal shelters && has taken several animals in until they can be fostered by someone.

while she is a pretty awesome aunt to the both of trish's kids, it also hurts spending time with them since she knows that that's something she is unable to have of her own. that isn't to say that she hasn't tried a time or two. and even though she could look into just going through an adoption agency, she hasn't exactly wanted to do that on her own so the opportunity to having children hasn't been successful.

she does, however, foster plenty of the younger wrestlers in as her children instead to make up for this factor.

believes in the wiccan services which is a form of modern paganism and is planned in connection with the phases of the moon.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

honorary daughter ( @miroirnoir ): these two originally met due to callie's at the time best friend dragging callie along to her first fan experience, which she didn't have any desire in attending, until amy recognized the shirt she was wearing, causing her to imprint on amy like a lost baby duckling since an adult took the time to validate her interests. since that point forward any time her best friend had taken her to these, she would atleast get a new photo taken with amy, which made amy actually remember her face and name. and once they met up again when callie did get into the industry, amy told her that if she needs family then she has one in her since she'd kind of got to see callie grow up anyway due to all those times they'd taken photos together from different various years.

the one that got away: while these two are no longer together, amy cannot seem to stop reminiscing about the early days of the relationship with this person. if life would of been different, she would be their girl still, and the two of them would be loyal to each other and face the world together. in this alternate existence, she would persuade them to stay with her, and she wouldn't then be describing them, mournfully, as the one who got away from her. she regrets not telling them just how much they meant to her when she had the chance to, as she’s now living with the consequences of letting them slip away.

unlikely friends: these two are the complete opposite of each other and yet somehow they’ve found their way into a quirky sort of friendship. perhaps they bicker a bit, but that’s what makes their relationship all the more interesting.

yoga buddy: someone who she could go to yoga classes with, she's a very avid goer, so maybe this person isn't as much, but she drags them along anyways or they're just as crazy about attending yoga classes.

dislike: amy tries to get along with everyone, but this person would be a special case. they just grind each other’s gears and will never stop bickering.

friend turned enemy: once upon a time these two used to be tight-knit, but that all changed along the way for whatever the reason may be and now they are enemies.

others: bad influence, enemies to friends, unrequited crush, confidant, partner in crime, frenemies, flings, someone he can be extremely affectionate with, and anything else really.

muse: amy finds muse for her lyrics in a lot of things. mainly she finds them in her own emotions, so there’s something about this person that evokes so many different feelings inside of her that she can’t help but wax poetic about them in the ways she knows how to.

[moondal514]

aftg :) 📓

hi rory!

I can’t remember if I’ve talked about this wip on here yet or not but last year I made this plot outline for an au based on the book The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August by Catherine Webb. It’s pretty long (which is why I haven’t written it lol).

Trigger warning for excessive reincarnation/time loop-style major character death (Andrew dies a lot, often very young) and for mentions of child abuse and csa, per Andrew’s canonical trauma

So Andrew, Neil, and a few other characters are what are called “Ouroborans,” someone who is reborn into their same life over and over again. Per the rules of The First Fifteen Lives of Harry August universe, Ouroborans lived as normal babies until their 4th birthday. Then they get regain what memories of their previous turns at life they remember. Andrew is a special sort of Ouroboran because he remembers everything about every turn of his life he has ever taken thanks to his eidetic memory.

My idea for the fic is that it would be mostly from Andrew’s pov with occasional interludes from Neil.

Andrew’s 1st turn at his life is actually pretty good. He’s adopted at 4 by a pleasant but unremarkable conservative couple. The couple adopted him because they were infertile but thought that having a child was the sort of thing they’re supposed to do cuz blah blah heteronormativity or whatever. They’re not really all that interested in Andrew besides just being able to say that he’s their child and Andrew isn’t really interested in them. And so, he lives a pretty normal, albeit closeted, boring life. Unfortunately he dies young in an accident in college.

In his next life, he gets his memories back at 4 and subsequently becomes way too weird of a child for said conservative couple to adopt. He’s sent right back into the system and so begins his shitty foster care experience. From there Andrew reincarnates often because he usually dies very young from abuse, neglect, and/or straight up accidents. The oldest he lives is usually ~13 years (he doesn’t make it past living a few months with the Spears if he makes it that far) and he is never able to replicate that first life because he becomes a very strange (read: traumatized) child once he gets his memories back and it’s too off-putting for most families to want to adopt him.

This changes when Andrew meets Renee, also an Ouroboran. He learns there’s a whole community of people like him (though he learns that he’s weird for being able to perfectly remember all of his lives, as most Ouroborans only remember basic details about their past lives, but that doesn't surprise him because he already knew that his memory is weird). Of course Andrew’s a cynical little fuck and at first thinks Renee is a quack, so she flat-out stabs him like a badass and gives him a time and place to meet up with her his next life, which he does. Andrew doesn’t really care for any of the others in the Ouroboran community but he likes Renee because he thinks she’s cool. Unfortunately he falls out of contact with her when she gets adopted by Stephanie Walker.

Renee’s presence in Andrew’s life keeps him alive through that time period of his first few months living with the Spears, so for the first time, he lives long enough to learn about Aaron’s existence (which happens similarly to canon). What happens next is a montage of Andrew’s next few lives where he keeps dying in the process of trying to find ways to keep Aaron away from the Spear house. Eventually Andrew decides that the best way he can keep Aaron safe is remove himself from the equation, so he puts himself into juvie. There he meets Betsy, working as a therapist for juvie kids, and learns that she too is an Ouroboran. He strikes up a friendship with her and gets some real therapy for the 1st time in his many lives.

From there, things proceed as canon (except Andrew doesn’t tell Luther about Drake cuz in this au he ain’t telling anyone shit about his abuse) until Tilda’s car accident. Andrew dies in the car with her.

In Andrew’s next life after that, he goes looking for Betsy as soon as he can and basically her influence via phone keeps him alive long enough for things to mostly proceed as canon (with a couple exceptions: Andrew does his best to manipulate events, with Betsy's help, so that Aaron is out of Tilda's care as soon as possible and with the Hemmicks. Andrew also manages to not get arrested for defending Nicky) until PSU. During Andrew’s 1st year, Riko flat-out kills Andrew to get Kevin.

So for a while Andrew’s lives proceed mostly in this same fashion. PSU is the point at which Andrew’s lives get stuck at. If he lived long enough to make it to college, he can’t stop himself from making a deal with Kevin and every time he manages to get himself killed by Riko.

And then: enter Neil.

I’m stopping there because this outline is very long lol

Send me a “📓” emoji and I’ll tell you about a fic wip

[casinilloelaizah]

Blossoming:My Memoir of Self-Acceptance

I remember when I was young, growing up was what thrills me. I always end up thinking of things that I want to do when I grow up. All I could think of is to have fun, buy the things I want, travel from different places and more. I was a child that was hoping to have a life I have been dreaming of. But is growing up as easy as we think it is? Well, growing up is exciting and interesting, yet it is also complicated. Life is hard, and it depends on how you respond to it. It is full of unexpected circumstances that challenge you as a person. I was young and clueless of how my life worked. Thinking of how my life went?

Reminiscing when I was younger, I was on an easy street. My childhood was the best time of my existence. Playing and having fun outside with friends and getting scolded by my parents afterward was the silliest yet memorable thing.

I was cheerful and carefree when I was a kid. I always explored things and looked for ways to amuse myself. I loved to dance and sing when I was younger. I even took an interest in photography since I loved to take pictures of random things I saw at home, but I just kind of lost my interest in it growing up. I even dreamed of being a teacher someday, though, I realized it is stressful. My dreams just randomly change overtime.

My curiosity blossomed like a delicate bud as I ventured into the life of education. New learning and knowledge filled me, and I've met such amazing people that turned into friendships. I even remember when I was in kindergarten that I usually cried when my mother left me in school. I was so terrified because I was not used to being away from my mama. Growing up wasn't that hard for me, since my parents were always there for me. I don't brood at all because I depend on them. My father was the one hustling to provide for our needs. They always support us in everything we do. They always try their best just to make us happy. I was lucky to have my parents; that's why I always try my best to make them proud, so I tried my best to excel in school. My parents didn't force me to get high grades, I am the one who wants to do it for myself, for the reason that I want to be proud of. All they just wanted for me was to finish school.

I've lived my life smoothly and hustle-free, and I thought it would always be, though it was not.

When I was 10 years old, I was picked on a lot by my classmates. I didn't get easily intimidated by it, not until I turned 12 years old. In high school, I easily get affected and sensitive by everything people talk about and say about me. I am not usually the type of person who gets easily irritated just because of teasing, but maybe it is a part of me growing up and being an adolescent. After experiencing being picked on by my own friends, I just kind of lost my will to interact. I became more insecure about myself and was more cautious in my actions. The whispers of doubt echoed louder than the cheers of encouragement. But I chose to listen to the remaining encouragement that is left which came from my family. I still try to build relationships, but I chose to keep fewer trustworthy people around me.

As I entered Senior High School, life became more complex. I have experienced diverse situations and responsibilities, struggling to balance my personal life and my studies, and I can say it has never been easy. Life is difficult, making me realize that I should strive harder. Throughout high school, I was focused on studying to divert myself, though I don't regret it because, in that way, I can make my family proud. I was also proud of myself, overwhelmed by my achievements. Adulthood gave me enlightenment that even through thick and thin, I should always look on the bright side. Experiencing everything I go through warmed my heart. I can't believe I went through all of it. It fostered a deeper understanding of the reason why everything is happening.

Life's getting harder, yet making me stronger. I was glad I got to experience such a variety of emotions growing up. Like a delicate plant in need of care, I began nurturing resilience. Through setbacks and challenges, I discovered the strength within to weather the storms of self-doubt. Each trial I faced makes me want to give up. Among those challenges, I found lessons. Gaining insights from other people and learning from them makes me understand life a little more and deeper. Being at school also helped me to boost my confidence and face my fear, which is being in front of many people. Right now I feel encouraged, knowing that I can overcome life's fears and challenges. Though I know I still have a lot to learn and I am willing to take risks. As I peeled away the layers of doubt, the light of self-discovery began to shine through.Reminding myself to always accept myself for who I am and never compare myself to anyone. Building my confidence was not easy for me but I will surely work on iy to improve. Each disappointment is a guide for me. It is okay to cry at night, but I always reminds myself that I shouldn't stop there. Though my journey is full of self-doubt, I still embrace the little things that make me happy. My family, friends, and taking care of myself are the ones I am giving attention to right now. Tired of everything, but will never be discouraged nor be moved by anyone anymore. No matter what will happen in my journey, I will only focus on myself and make myself proud every day. I am my own and not anyone else.

Each chapter is a movement, and contributes to the evolving strength of my existence, echoing the beauty of my journey. 

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

I'm pretty sure I'm arospec. I used to think I would be fine as long as I had a few close, meaningful friendships, but after losing one of those friendships recently, I'm really questioning whether there's any place in the world for someone like me. I'm not sure if I even know what a friend is anymore -- maybe I wanted too much, more than what's 'normal'. I feel like I'm simultaneously too much (for anyone who just wants a regular, casual friendship) and not enough (for anyone who would want to be close to me via a romantic relationship). I'm lonely, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to have the kind of relationships that work for me. I want to believe there's people out there on the same wavelength, but...I thought my former friend was, too, and that didn't turn out very well.

yeah, that's tough, Anon. And people don't talk about it enough, but losing a friend can be just as hard and hurt just as much as any other relationship. I think that's one of the big issues with how loosely we define friendships, it's hard to navigate if you feel the same commitment or meaningfulness for a friend as they do for you. Though of course any type of relationship can break down sometimes.

There are definitely people on your wavelength, and historically (and likely in other modern cultures as well), close platonic bonds have been very valued too. It's not a aro vs allo thing, there are a lot of allo people out there too who do care about this stuff too. The real problem is that as a society we've moved away from community in general and have been losing community spaces.

This is part of why I'm moving more and more towards pushing people in similar situations towards community spaces and finding communities you can belong to on top of fostering friendships. I definitely think you have the right idea with a few close friendship, even if one didn't work out. But I'd also suggesting seeking out community as well. And that can be things like hobbies (maybe a book or knitting club, maybe a DnD group, etc.), volunteering, cultural spaces, queer spaces, etc.

The important thing though is don't give up, Anon. Loneliness is a big modern issue, but people and communities like what you're looking for do exist. The kind of relationships you want with people are reasonable goals. Even if it can be hard sometimes.

All the best and good luck!

[qprstories]

Introduction

Hello, and welcome to qprstories! This blog was created by me, mod Ari (they/he), to document the experiences people have had being in QPRs! While searching around online to figure out my own thoughts and feelings about QPRs, I noticed that a lot of content online only explains what QPRs are on a surface level. This can be helpful to those who have never heard of them, but not much else. Relationships, in my mind, are best not understood by their dictionary definition but by the experiences of the people in them. For friendships, romantic relationships, and other common types of relationships in our society, this really isn’t a problem, but QPRs are so niche that barely anything exists about real people’s real life experiences with them. A resource for people’s experiences in QPRs, then, would foster a deeper understanding of them for everyone, including those seeking a QPR, those in QPRs, and those looking to understand them. Hence, this blog.

What even is a QPR, anyways?

QPRs, short for queerplatonic relationships, are difficult to define because the exact meaning and terms of a QPR are determined by those involved. They are meant to a respite for those who do not wish to conform to society’s expectations surrounding romantic and platonic relationships. Generally, QPRs occupy an “in-between” between friendship and romance, offering more commitment and intimacy than what is typical of friendship without the feelings and expectations of romantic relationships. Many a-spec (aromantic and asexual) people are drawn to QPRs because it allows them to have a committed relationship without the possibly unfavorable expectations of feelings and intimacy romantic relationships offer. However, anyone can be in a QPR, it is not restricted to only aspec people. QPRs can involve anything those involved desire, including sex and raising children together, but they may not. They can be polyamorous and monogamous, and you can be in a QPR and a romantic relationship at the same time. It depends on the relationship.

What’s gonna be on this blog?

This blog is not an askblog, but it does rely greatly on asks. If you have had any experiences with QPRs and being in one, please share them! It can be as simple as a time you really enjoyed “hanging out” with your QPP or as complex as the entire story of your past/present QPP. Additionally, if you have memes or your own thoughts about QPRs you would like to share, please, send them! That’s literally what this blog exists for. The only rules are as follows

It must be related to QPRs, or more broadly, queerplatonic attraction/the concept in general. You are welcome to talk about other topics as long as they relate to QPRs in some way.

No sexually explicit content. That doesn’t mean you can’t talk about having sex in a QPR... feel free to do so! Just nothing explicit, please.

No discourse or bigotry.

And that’s all!

Along with asks, this blog will also contain reblogs of other content relating to QPRs, like memes, text posts, and others. As I am also currently in a QPR of my own, I might also post stories of my own.

To make this blog easy to navigate, I’m going to use a tagging system to allow you to see the type of posts you want to see. They are:

#qprstories: Stories from people in QPRs, whether they be others or my own.

#myqprstories: Stories belonging to me, Mod Ari. My posts will be tagged with #qprstories as well as this tag.

#qpradvice: Advice about QPRs, may include reblogs.

#qprmemes: Memes about QPRs, may include reblogs.

#qprpostivity: Positivity about QPRs, may include reblogs

#qprthoughts: Thoughts about QPRs (think like, textposts), may include reblogs.

#qprupdates: Updates about this blog. 

#qprmisc: Anything that does not fit into the above categories.

One last note

If you know anyone who would appreciate this blog or are active on other social media platforms, please, share this! I want this resource to help as many people as possible.

Tagging some popular blogs with QPR-related content to spread the word: @queerplatonicpositivity @qpr-culture-is @ace-aro-queerplatonic-positivity

[littlemoondarling]

i don't know your characters yet, but i want to, sooo... 9, 12, 26, 30, 35, 42, 48, 50 and 57 for both ezra and theodore! hopefully it's not too much... 😅

Awww ty so much!! No ask is too much so never worry ab it! I'll answer under the read more bc I talk alot~

Starting off with dear ol Ezra Woodburn because he's a bit more down to earth than Teddy

[9] What is their love language?

His love language is physical affection, if he initiates it with you then you are sure to be his favourite person in the whole world because he despises being touched. That was how his husband discovered that "oh shit there may be something more than friendship here" when Ezra randomly cuddled next to him while watching movies on the couch.

[12] How high is their self-esteem?

Ezra's self esteem is so low it migot as well be in the center of earth XD

He was never able to accept anything about himself and always felt like a mistake that shouldn't have been born, but still, he makes it to over 50.

[26] Do they have any physical or mental ilness, how do they handle it and how open they are about it?

He has both, he has chronic joint pain and fatigue that he has been struggling with since childhood, he also suffers from terrible social anxiety, depression and autism but he never got diagnosed because he refuses to go to a psychiatrist. His family is a very conservative "pull yourself by your bootstraps" kinda family so he was raised to feel immense shame at his disabilities and so he is only open about them with his husband, but it isn't too difficult for people around him to guess given his behaviour.

[30] What are their most healthy and most unhealthy coping mechanisms?

The healthiest is definitely writing and spending quality time with his husband and cat, the unhealthy is sh and smoking :|

[35] Do they like their own appearance, and what do they do, if anything, to alter it in any way?

He really really doesn't, if he is given the chance to look like anyone else he would take it in a heartbeat. He got both top and bottom surgery to ease the dysphoria of being born in the wrong body and he has thought about going to the gym to lose some weight but his pain immediately flares up, but he is getting slightly better at accepting himself given how many kisses his husband gives the areas he considers flawed.

[42] What is their idea of a perfect friendly hangout and/or romantic date?

Going out to the library or a picnic in nature, maybe even a trip to the shelter so he can pet all the animals and coo at them and beg you for seven more cats, three birds, a turtle and a snake.

[48] Are they, or were they at some point in their life, a part of any subculture?

He experimented with the leather goth subculture in his 20s but he immediately discovered that he doesn't have the energy to melt in the summer, so for now it is only a winter and bedroom subculture XD

[50] What are they really good and really bad at?

He's good at cooking, writing, organizing, cleaning and giving orders, he sucks at teamwork, asking for help, singing and knowing when to take a break (and socializing, my man has 0 friends outside of the ones his husband introduced him to)

[57] What was the most stupid or dangerous thing they have ever done?

The most stupidly dangerous thing was to let a stranger that ten years before was his bully at summer camp into his home because he (The bully) had all his money stolen and had nowhere to stay, it ended well for him tho.

The most dangerous thing is probably having 7 attempts at his own life before he turned 25. He eventually met a guy in the psych ward who was fostering a mother cat and her kittens and that is how he got his little angel cat Pumpkin (the guy at the psych ward was Theodore)

Now for Theodore Malik!

[9] What is their love language?

Giving gifts and acts of survice, he will cook for you and make you the best outfits you've ever seen all for the small price of tolerating his existence and listening to him ramble about Batman for way waaaay too long. On the more extreme end he will kill for the people he cares about ♡

[12] How high is their self-esteem?

It fluctuates between I am a gift from god blessing you with my mere existence to I am the worst thing to ever happen to this planet and if i don't stop existing right now the whole world will explode.

[26] Do they have any physical or mental ilness, how do they handle it and how open they are about it?

He is immortal and has otherworldly physical strength and immunity but you will find him with very sever injuries more times than not, mentally he has a little cocktail that consists of depression, general anxiety, bipolar, ptsd and some psychotic hallucinations. He is very open about everything and you WILL know when he is upset because nothing on God's green earth will stop this man from complaining.

[30] What are their most healthy and most unhealthy coping mechanisms?

The healthy ones are cooking, embroidery and chatting with his friends, the unhealthy ones are smoking, drinking, driving off of cliffs and other destructive actions

[35] Do they like their own appearance, and what do they do, if anything, to alter it in any way?

He is obsessed with his appearance, narcissus levels of self love, all except his eyes, they are blue like his mother but he would very much prefer if he had inherited the warm brown of his father's.

[42] What is their idea of a perfect friendly hangout and/or romantic date?

Theodore's perfect date would be going to the club, getting wasted and forgetting about everything the next day, but if you're not a fan of that he would settle to going to a convention with you.

[48] Are they, or were they at some point in their life, a part of any subculture?

Punk goth, from the 60s till now, before that he just dressed in frilly dressed with floral patterns

[50] What are they really good and really bad at?

He is good at listening, taking care of people, cooking, making and fixing clothes, making friends, and making enemies, he's terrible and mainting a healthy long term relationship, taking care of himself, cleaning, and making good life decisions

[57] What was the most stupid or dangerous thing they have ever done?

Every choice he has ever done is stupid and dangerous, the honorable mentions being running away from home at 16 to go live with the man who stalked him, didn't end well at all. Attempting to kill his ex's abusive ex but he is the most powerful vampire so the only damage Theodore managed to do was burning half of that man's face (and getting himself on a hitlist) and having a thing for mafia bosses which isn't that good when you date two people from opposing sides at the same time :)