#i do hope i speak this into existence
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Excuse the format (I made this for instagram since that's what the publisher wants, rip) but this is basically a shorter, easy-to-read version of the history section at the back of my new book.
(Part 2 || The book)
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Disclaimer: I'm extremely not an expert, and this is only scratching the very surface of complex topics that are hard to simplify. I mostly made this to EXTREMELY rec these books and podcasts, and would urge you to go check them out if you're not familiar!!
This stuff might seem obvious to some of you, but let me tell you, I do NOT think it's widely known in the general UK population.
Imo a lot of the general (especially white) public think that the Windrush generation - Caribbean migrants brought in to help rebuild postwar Britain in the 50s - were the first Black communities in the UK. And yet there's deliberately not much focus on why the Caribbean has links with northern europe. HMMMM
(Britain loves, for example, to celebrate the abolition of slavery without mentioning WHAT CAME BEFORE IT - Britain being the biggest trader of enslaved people, with more than 1 million people enslaved in the British Caribbean. They literally just did it overseas.)
Telling the truth about history or British imperialism gets this massive manufactured backlash at the moment. There are so many ideas prevalent in UK politics - anti-Black, anti-refugee, anti-trans - based on going ‘back’ to some imaginary version of the past. Those are enabled by a long tradition of carving parts out of the historical record, and being selective about whose histories get told and preserved. Even though the book I was making is a fun rom-com, by the time I finished researching, I decided to make an illustrated history section at the back too (this is a mini version). My hope is that readers who haven’t come across these histories might get an introduction to them - and some pointers of what they could read next to get a clearer view of our past.
#i feel like it's also gone the other way a bit#where some people imagine a sanitised bridgerton version of historical britain where racism doesnt exist?#trying to speak to BOTH groups#but like. you can't understand british history without the white supremacy inherent in its empire building. that IS british history#can't overstate how impossible it was to read anything about 1800s england without being clobbered round the face with colonialism#anyway uk people pls read at least one imperial history book by someone who's not white AND not entrenched in establishment revisionism#i shall make a tag for this in the hope i do more#hari's history corner
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quick lmhs itafushi because god help me i have Not been able to get the concept of yuuji smiling/laughing into kisses out of my head
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#fushiguro megumi#itafushi#fanart#jjk fanart#yuuji#megumi#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#lmhs#shade skin with green without making the characters look Nauseous challenge#...success???? i mean i sure HOPE success :'>#i blocked in a green (bc lmhs i...usually block in a green...) but then i thought. i will try putting hints of it on the skin Also#and i like it !!! i fr one do not think they look seasick#i love lmhs itfs because the colour scheme is so Earthy (pun intended). moss green... warm browns... my beloveds <333#but even more than that#i love love loVE. drawing yuuji looking at megumi like he is all that exists in the world#bc i Also look at megumi like he is all that exists in the world#also im sure this is a common artist thing to have designated Spots fr characters when drawing them interacting#like fr me . normally when i draw itfs interacting in any way (read: smooching) i default to putting megu on the Right#so this admittedly threw me a bit GHSGJ#anyway!!! i realized it has been a whole WEEK since my last lmhs itfs and that simply will not stand.#my quOTA D: D: D: my self imposed QUOTA#i am going to get a bad grade in long term passion project :( sam is going to kill me and then Fire me#speaking of sam i shant say much but yuuji is currently experiencing The Horrors(tm) in draft1 so he can have a distraction :3 my treat#one of us has to be nice to him and it seems it is my turn#anyway i amn eepyyyy goodnight smile :)
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since tumblr always has to suffer my personal vents and breakdowns and rants and annoyances you get the most wips and pics of unfinished stuff, im sure that makes up for it
the (unfinished) shiekah arm concepts that made me want to explode and i dont think im gonna work on again
#ganondoodles#art#zelda#ganondoodles rewrites totk#botw2#wip#calling it wip but i dont think i can go back to it#i tried to keep going on this for so long bc i have had the idea in mind for so long and it seemed fun#well ...... turns out that was a lie#thought to myself maybe i can do like one of those cool concept art things where they just go for interesting shapes first#and then refine it to actually work#but im not made for it#tbh im not sure what im made for#(i dont think posting wips im not posting elsewhere actually makes up for my annoying mental health spirals..)#i hope its not too small#was intending to go for version H but only got to do one variation#the outer casing can be customized with several designs#theres a guardian arm that extends and stretches to form the hookshot in the bulky part as well as the stored magic#there is always something on it to glow bc it also subtly shows how low your magic meter is#and if it runs out the blue parts turn orange like other shiekah tech in stand by mode#wanted to draw all that on here too#but .... ill need to start over when im doing better ....... WHEN im doing better and can draw again#speaking it into existence#(....man how all those “designs” look is so ... i feel even stupider for getting so extremely frustrated over it ...)
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Figured I'd try my hand at some Redacted character post/text edits!
[ 1 / ? ]
Credit to @/sainthowlzon for all the Listener icons, and to @/elisacaleisa for their google drive with all the canon icons!
(slightly alternative version of the Solaires' GC edit below the cut bc i had a lil too much fun with what Vincent would name his contacts)
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redacted memes#redactedverse#redacted sam#redacted darlin#redacted vincent#redacted honey#redacted guy#redacted azmidi#redacted sweetie#redacted david#redacted asher#redacted treasure#redacted porter#redacted alexis#redacted william#*slaps post* *flextape meme guy voice* now THAT's a lotta characters!#good Lord these were hard to figure out ALT text for. anyone more experienced with describing images feel free to lmk if i did it wrong#i'm trying to both give credit to the images source (when there even is one. text screenshots are usually source-less when i find them)#And to explain what the original images said. And how I edited them. And who's speaking in what message and aaaaaaa ...i Tried#breaking away from my old style of edits by actually changing the OP's handles to suit the characters. but i'm not creative enough to think#-of cool ones so it's just gonna be their names most of the time probably lmao. but i'll leave the original ones unedited if they happen-#-to fit like the Darlin' one did. and sometimes there Is no handle/url in the image to begin with so. i'm playing it by ear#still gonna put credit to the OPs in the ALT text when i can tho. anyways. that's enough overanalyzing meme edits for one night#i spent way too much time on these so i sure do hope that some of y'all find them funny#and as usual with these kinda edits i really hope i'm not accidentally making any that have been done before!#if i ever make a duplicate of someone else's i swear its not intentional i just dont have time to scour the fandom for every existing edit#also i know that's not how iMessages are formatted but i had to find a way to make it clear who's POV we're seeing the convo from so yeah
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I hope all transwomen get $10,000 today and also see a cute bird or maybe a cool bug of some kind
#ra speaks#lgbt#trans#transgender#transwomen#transfemmes#you exist because you belong and you belong because you exist.#sisters of every shape and size and color and ability and outness: I love you. you exist because you belong here and now in this world.#and as scary as it is sometimes I know things will get better because you are loved and you belong.#you do not deserve the hate of others for existing nor the fear and pain you are feeling now.#and I hope someday soon you can live out the long and well loved life of good food and good friends and joy and safety that you deserve
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How does conversion work for a trans person? I'm scared of being naked for the mikveh immersion and also the part about circumcision, I really don't want anyone to see my body naked
I feel you on that, anon. So, it will heavily depend on which branch of judaism you plan on converting to, but there will be trans-friendly and trans-unfriendly spaces within each branch. I think the best course of action is to ask around with rabbis which take in students - definitely ask rabbis what their expectations would be as a trans student. Honestly, the only reason I didn't disclose my transness immediately to my rabbi was because I could tell he'd be trans-friendly even through email.
Now, I don't know your specific circumstances, nor will I ask, but there are options depending on what you're looking for. I'm a trans guy - I don't have the obligation to go through bris, and I'm not really able to. However, I do fulfill many of the mitzvot for men, and that compromise sort of offsets the fact that I don't have any way to really go through with bris.
For the mikvah, I've heard some places will put a sheet barrier in the water so that your body isn't fully seen. From what I know, you just need people to witness (even for a split second) that you are fully immersed and not your body. This might be dependent on the movement, however.
Otherwise, the process is very similar if not identical to cis counterparts. You can fulfill a ton of mitzvot as yourself, and in general, transness doesn't really prevent you from doing that. I would definitely talk with your rabbi for any accomodations you might want in this process - it's imperative that you're able to trust your rabbi to be receptive and willing to hear you out or compromise or anything else. If you have follow-up questions, I'd love to hear them; I can only speak to my experiences, but I know that it can sometimes be comforting to know you're not the only trans convert in the world. Transsexuals have become jewish since the dawn of time; you have no reason not to be jewish if that is something you want.
#ask#jumblr#jew by choice#jewish conversion#trans jews#queer jews#personal thoughts tag#i can't speak to the mikvah process as a trans person yet but once i do i will let you know what my options were and what i chose#i myself have become a lot less dysphoric but there was definitely a time where i was EXACTLY where you are now anon#so i get the feeling and i want you to know that there is nothing wrong with how you feel#being trans is a beautiful thing but it's also hard#with the last sentence: it's lighthearted but it's true#trans people have existed for thousands of years#trans people didn't just magically start converting when we were invented in 2014 in the bowels of tumblr#no; we were in medieval spain and bronze age egypt and talking with emperors and existing as people no matter what#to say that there's no precedent for trans people and no precedent for us comverting isn't really true#therefore there is *inevitably* going to be a space for you. judaism is vast this is true. which means there's a spot for you in it#it's true that not all spots in judaism are progressive. there are some places where being trans isn't seen as a thing#but that doesn't mean judaism is going to look that way across the board#i hope remembering that helps. it helps me
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litany of the martyrs (click for better resolution!)
#at some point i wanted to make an illustration for each character but in retrospect maybe each is multiple song-coded..#drew the sketch for a quincy thing after a chat with a mutual reminded me this song existed dfsghjkl and then spent weeks rendering this#quincy cynthius martin#adamandi#i'm finally done with this! the saints especially were joys to paint and the halo a menace.... this has been the most ambitious one so far.#but it also took quite long because i only worked on it <engages with quincy> when mentally okay to deal with the themes. i'm not religious#but i do identify with the irrational(?ish) guilt + family legacy + academic achievement + disregard for self. also more complex thoughts#about love [but depsite quincent being a large part of quincy's character this piece deals with mostly the Rest of it. so another time..]#anyways! in the original sketch- the saints had heads bent towards quincy so the halo spikes pointed at him. but this worked better! halos#of the saints implying/creating one for quincy was a concept from the start though. in the show they don't touch him directly here but#differences in mediums i think- i don't have time in an image to craft a narrative so everything has to be happening. also artistic liberty#misc inspiration for this includes stained glass windows. i might have maybe misinterpreted the saint costume but i think i logic-ed it out#as the cloth part following a nun's habit w the hood. and then halo above. the material is also more transparent originally but i had. um.#too much fun painting fabric folds.. if you look closely you can see the basis of faces though behind the cloth; but only the vague shapes#because smth obscurity + inhumanness// cassian is the only one i gave a mouth though. that stems from melliot's post about the saints and#st cassian as spokesperson (<- did research teehee!) that's also how i found out which costume = which saint. speaking of which.#left to right: 'st lucy take my hand' // 'st lawrence give me strength' (presses quincy forward; but hand on shoulder connotates guidance)#/'st cassian help me smile' (quincy's mouth is btwn a grimace and a smile; tilts up at side. also no direct touch bc added insidiousness.)#//'st jude [...] i hope your causes burn' (jude's hand is in two places to show movement- nearing the flame and then snatching back; burnt)#other notes: at the midst of the flame the core is shaped like a human heart /the saints and their wax are all melting like the candle for#fun visual effect and also this way they are even less tangible <real>. perks of painting as a medium i guess. // also insp from icarus?#wax and burning imagery; looking at the halo and rays as parallel to sun that burns. too close to the sun; melting; hurting; hurtling //#candles at bottom are a nod to the frankly gorgeous set// also the entire composition kind of stems from the lyric <what use is a candle if#both ends aren't burning>; the two sides between the concepts of catholic guilt and academic perfection that spur quincy#the halo above (saints and guilt; litanyofthemartyrs) and the 'halo' below (academic papers; insp from choreo for perfect at school)#the papers were originally supposed to be more glowy. but i like the idea of it now being a reflection of how quincy's priorities shift#also of note is that <candle> in centre = quincy; w burning candle + aforementioned heart in flame -> most human; idea of love + passion#last thoughts: kneeling + hands close tgt = prayer //wax dripping onto the red As make an effect that looks like blood. because i like#hiding that within the adamandi pieces :OO continuity!! // i've run out of tags but yeah! had fun with this one! every so often i go a#little insane in making art and the final result astounds even me. ngl i'm quite proud of this one. pretty colours <3333
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Waiter, waiter!! More Viking Scotnor headcanons please! (If you have any ofc :3 )
Oh no!! Not my weakness!! 😳
Their relationship during the viking age was mostly very amicable, apart from a few minor fights and arguments later on. In contrast to England and Denmark, Norway and Scotland mostly co-existed peacefully beside each other and even developed a friendship. Norway has always been a traveller and would rarely stay in one place for long, but he would often spend his summers and occaionally autumns in his territories close to Scotland before moving along on his next adventure. During these months Norway and Scotland would hang out and Norway would tell Scotland stories about all his adventures out on the sea, exploring westward, as a hired soldier for the Byzantine emperor, helping out Denmark with his wars agaisnt England, and joining Sweden on his trips east. Scotland would think these were the coolest stories and always look forward to Norway's occasional visits. And sometimes Norway would even bring him exotic gifts he'd picked up on his travels.
#hetalia#scotnor#aph norway#aph scotland#hws norway#hws scotland#thanks for the ask!!! 🥰🥰🥰 scotnor asks are awlays my faves#and pls ignore my inconsistent age for them in this time period 😭 I can never make up my mind#also my headcanons for them are so poorly fleshed out - they just exists as concepts in my brain without elaboration#hope this all makes sense#such a contrast between the Scandi bros as vikings too#Sweden: trade - Denmark: wars - Norway: exploration#that's the main plot lines of the three countries broadly speaking#obviously more neuances but this is my main take on them#I should do more viking norway stuff because there's so much to be inspired by#maybe in the future
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the persona 3 protagonist 25th anniversary nui in food appliances!
#lizzy speaks#persona 3#minato arisato#makoto yuki#guys friendly reminder that this is what adulthood is about dont listen to anyone who calls you cringe#hence why im putting these in the main tags. i mean they're not incorrect for what the photos are about. lmao#anyway this was a very fun birthday!!! i feel very loved and supported by so many people and i got to do very fun things (like this)...#i think... birthday is like thanksgiving to me. in the gratitude respect.#a reminder of all the lovely people that i have gotten a chance to meet and how i've learned from them#it makes me very happy to have been born... i think every day is a great day to celebrate life's grandeur + brilliance + magnificence#it's just a very poignant and strong feeling that i have that i'm happy to have met so many wonderful people#and while there are some people i've only known for brief periods of time or people who i havent really been good at keeping in contact wit#i do cherish it! im so grateful. so happy that there are people who cheer my silly shenanigans on#while there are ways in which aging makes me go “oh hmm” i think overall i'm happy that i get to keep on living and learning#i have so much fondness for humanity and people... like even if i dont get to talk to ppl directly i just get very emotional yknow#like wow.. you exist.. thats so fucking awesome... i hope you have an awesome day... im glad our paths could cross#if you have read up to this point of my tags.. thank you for reading and being part of my life#i will keep on being the silliest guy ive ever known! cheers to more shenyanigans and self-discovery :3
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lmao it is undeniably true that I am Depressi Spaghetti but you know. fuck it we continue.
#red said#i am hoping!!!! that this is January Brain speaking#it FEELS as if I've been in an extended depressive episode since like. may or June#but depression is a Filthy Fucking Liar so that may or may not be true#either way it's very tedious. there is no reason for this. i am very loved and cared for. i am doing well. it is just that my brain is soup#SAD AND SELF-LOATHING SOUP#we cannot resist the Soup we can only swim on through#idk it is like. i feel as if i don't exist beyond work i feel like I'm losing myself i feel like I'm very alone#this all FEELS very true even though actually i have many passions i do many things and i am booked to the gills with social engagements#so you know. what's it all about? The Soup. possibly also The Dark.#possibly also also that many people i care about are going through really rough times and I'm kinda. not?#and that's WEIRD both that I'm not and that I've developed like a level of boundaries where people i live going through it#doesn't mean I'm in a constant state of panic.#and slash or. where I'm too depressi spaghetti to have the energy to be there for them#i don't THINK it's that. that's never been a thing for me before really.#but idk i think it's like when i reach the end of my to do list i panic that I've forgotten something vital#i am not panicking and that makes me feel. strange and empty and immobile.#even though in actuality I'm in constant motion like. barely a free moment. but i FEEL static i FEEL inactive#because I'm not in 24/7 crisis mode#and then bc i feel inactive i don't understand why I'm so tired. I'm so tired because I'm ALWAYS DOING THINGS.#but also i do feel kind of. numb. everything is just running past me. except sometimes i feel spasms of grief cause like#I've ended or majorly changed a lot of relationships this past year#but yeah i think the numbness is PROBABLY the January of it all and will PROBABLY lift in March/April#and if it doesn't. well. fuck it. we continue. i am yet young.
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kirbytober 2023 21 + 26 : fav characters + ship [ prev || next ]
putting this at the top because it's extremely important but i received a message implying that some folks headcanon these two as drastically different ages. you may headcanon whatever you like of course, but in my work i firmly think that they're both full adults who are at least 25+. this is abundantly clear in my work. i'm not interested in headcanoning any of them as literal children and i would never touch that shit. dni if you think that sort of ship would actually be okay. don't be a freak. thanks.
very typical to take your favs and then also shove them together but isn't that the point. anyway i have literally never seen anybody else ship them (if you're out there... hello... 😭) despite them both being very main characters and i don't know why?? they could be so cute i think...
they are both industrious adventurers, prolific hard-workers (team task doers), and a little cheekily competitive!
i think that bandee is no stranger to a wide variety of close and intense relationships; he's beloved by many and loves them all equally but distinctly in turn. magolor on the other hand has been sooo isolated and lonely for such a long-ass time, he barely knows how to be friends let alone really care for someone. bandee is smart enough to be suitably wary but kind enough to give him a chance despite that, which i think would knock him off his non-existent feet instantly. in reply, magolor could give him something unique by loving and prioritising him utterly singularly, in a way bandee wouldn't even have realised he was missing
in awtdy (pictured in the sketch page; if you see a tattered looking magolor in my art it's probably this au) in particular they are both thrown into the angst soup together and come out insanely trauma bonded at the hip. their friendship/relationship is central to the plotline; together they're working on a solution to the timeline anomaly, while also hiding that they even really know each other the whole time
#kirbtober#kirbytober#bandana waddle dee#magolor#my art#my hcs#awtdy au#yelling 'hello' into the void like the voyager probe hoping to reach another living creature who speaks the bandeemagolor language#i tend to ship in a kind of qpp way just for clarification. i kinda just don't think amatonormative romance exists the same on popstar#that said they are like... utterly unwell about each other. insane. i just am not sure they are “Dating” yknow? i dunno how to explain this#but if you are arospec and you Get What I Mean then you can say that they're in love and stuff. if you get it yknow?? yknow.#mental illnesses shaped like each other.#i know bandee is 'the normal guy' but i think he can be a little mentally unwell sometimes too; as a treat#anyway.... that's it that's the rarepair. maybe its up to me to make this a thing. do you wanna be sold on this pair?? i can do it probably#they *don't even have a tag name* but i will make up one so that people can filter it out if they want to mute it:#bandee x magolor#🍎
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past me could not even comprehend the scale that is max verstappen's goathood
#f1#max verstappen#brazilian gp 2024#u can clearly see this was written pre-red flag bc of the lack of hope. and belief.#trust i always thought he could do it but i wasn't about to speak that into existence and risk him flying off the track entirely ok
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Reasons Why I Need a Sexy JoongDunk BL
If you know me, then you’ll know that it’s actually kind of funny that I’m asking for this. Me. A sex-repulsed leaning asexual who, for the most part, tends to stay away from (overly) sexy and/or horny series. And yet I really want a sexy JoongDunk series. A messy, Only Friends-type of series even, perhaps.
Make no mistake, though. I don’t actually want it for me, oh no. No, I want a sexy JoongDunk series for them, for their sake. Because I feel like they’d have a whole lot of fun with it.
And here’s why I think so:
Reason #1: Dum Dum
Definitely the most obvious reason, but the LOL Fanfest Dum Dum performance: the fact that the choreography was like That. And the fact that it was their idea to switch up who bites who for day 2:
Not to mention the fact that Dunk actually bit Joong for real:
I'm just saying, they wanted “hot and sexy��, they chose this:
Reason #2: “We’ve never done this before”
The way they kept bringing up how Hidden Agenda is more mature than Star in My Mind and how there were scenes that they’d never done before*, it seemed to have been a big deal for them.
*see here for some eng subs (this video is unfortunately heavily edited)
Reason #3: “Favorite episode of Hidden Agenda? Episode 8!!”
The way Joong immediately said episode 8 was his favorite, smiling expectantly at Dunk...
...and then was very adamant when Dunk couldn’t decide between episodes 7 and 8:
Considering their comments of how “episode 8 is special” because they’ve “never done anything like this before”... Well, dare I bet it’s their favorite episode because of the ending specifically. Unless maybe they were particularly excited about the stalker story line. I don’t think they’d done that before either.
Reason #4: Ep8 watch party live on Instagram
The way they actually sat down and went live on Instagram in order to watch, react to, and comment on the entirety of episode 8.
And considering Dunk’s comment at the beginning of this live about how it’s “something we've never done before” I’m absolutely convinced they chose ep8 to react to specifically because of the ending lmao. Unless, of course, they were extremely hyped about the stalker plot. There were no creepy stalker plots in Star in My Mind, nor do I remember any significant stalking in Joong’s other works. Or maybe the two of them were referring to the scene where Zo bites Joke’s arm. I don’t remember any biting from Star in My Mind, so who knows, it might be that. What else was special in ep8? Oh right, Joke punched the stalker. That can’t have been the “we’ve never done this before” thing, though, considering Joong was literally in a Mafia series before. Also, he punched Pepper in Star in My Mind. My theory still stands.
Reason #5: “It was more intense than this”
In that instagram live they also dropped that a lot was cut from that scene and that it was supposed to be more intense than this. Uh, boys...? What kind of choreography did y’all on set come up with for this scene exactly??
(I can’t stop laughing at Dunk's face when he agrees with Joong saying that a lot was cut. He looks like he suddenly bit into a very sour lemon lmao)
In conclusion:
Clearly they had a lot of fun with the Dum Dum performance and it seems that they were very excited about getting to do something more mature with Hidden Agenda, and also getting the the chance to do something that they’ve “never done before” in ep8 specifically. So my point stands: I think they’d have a blast playing a sexy series together. I want it for them.
Bonus: Vampire BL
Bonus points if this sexy JoongDunk BL that I’m asking for is a vampire BL!! Here’s why:
You can find a more extensive list of vampire mentions in my JoongDunk Vampire Mentions Masterpost here.
#actually i think they'd have a blast on only friends ngl#i think they would totally have been up for it#airenyah plappert#joongdunk#adrm#sexy joongdunk vampire bl#i actually meant to upload this on sunday but then i ended up much longer than expected with my uni assignments rip#at least i've managed to get this done BEFORE gmmtv2024 tho so that's something i guess#also it doesn't actually need to be in 2024 tbh#i'll take one 2025 too#i'd also be excited to see them work apart from one another in separate projects#but. i need this at some point in the next 3ish years#@gmmtv do you hear me? ได้ยินไหมคะ#justice for joongdunk#edit: i made this post BEFORE gmmtv 2024 part 1#so waaaaay before part 2 dropped the announcement for the heart killers#and can i just say...#you know how i'm using only friends out of all shows as an example here in this post?#i mean... did i speak jd being in a jojo show into existence with this post?? did actually i manifest it???? LOVE that for me ngl dkfjdjfjf#i hope they get to have some fun during the shoot <3333#i mean we DO know that august 22nd 2024 was an unforgettable day for them and dunk did drop they were filming sth spicy that day so!! djjdjf
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(OC Lore and design time!)
(it got longer again ... sorry ... idk how to make things short, i just need to talk, but i guess if you can read the written stuff in the pic thats the barest bare bones of what i wrote here)
i was asked what new lore story stuff i had thought about that made me sad which i mentioned a bit ago, and while that is too hard to explain given all the missing context i thought i could at least talk about lore having to do with it :D
so, (Lord) Eadrya is one of my fav OCs (big blue lad, here a rough sketch in humanoid form) they are both one of if not THE most powerful demon alive and the most battle trained;
at the mid point of the story the demon world gets invaded by the celestials (the angel inspired things i talked about in the previous lore post with Xaror) and Shargon, as the king, should be their first and only frontline, but at this point his life is only being sustained by maschinery after being mortally wounded, he cannot fight (he realizes what is going on, rips himself off the maschinery to get at least his youngest child to safety, barely managing it before dying- the guardian, the demons god, takes over his body to attempt to fight against the celestials but cant keep itself alive long enough since its host is already dead) Eadrya takes the role of the frontline fighter (despite being very full of themselves and aggressive they care about their 'job' of protecting their own, also giving them the chance to show off just how strong they are); the fight was going well for them all things considered, but when the guardian activates it drains the power of all elemental lords (which Eadrya is one of, and since they have the most strength it also takes the most from them), so much so that they lose the fight and suffer deadly wounds (the worst being a spear through the chest made of a material that grows hard, root-like formations when in contact with demonic blood like a fungus but worse, also stopping any self healing processes) after the guardian falls apart it creates a huge shockwave of energy that stuns every living thing within a certain distance and possibly more-
Eadrya (in true demon form, so like a blue whale in size at least) was likely taken through an active gateway to the human world in a large tidal wave also created by the guardians fall; they wash up in the harbor of a small secluded village, the head of which is 'lady 13'; although never having seen a demon before and everyone being afraid (largely thinking its a strange hurt animal, only she suspected otherwise), they still gather all villagers to pull out the celestial spear, which is diffcult and brutal given that its already taken root, but the village lacked both knowledge and means to help any other way- doing so damaged their heart which is how they were able to collect samples of all three demonic blood types ('normal' -red like humans-, energy -essentially purely magic- and heartblood -highly concentrated energy only found within the heart of a demon and the only one to contain genetic material) (this is the start of Eadryas character arc, having to deal with the fact that their world is likely destroyed, them failing what they didnt think they could fail, having lost a battle so badly (even if not really their fault) for the first time and not knowing if literally anyone else has survived .. also being now stuck in the human world, which they dont like)
Lady 13 (placeholder name? stands for experiment 13) is a human that was tricked by demon hunters to enroll into a series of experiments trying to create hybrids of demons and humans, which they hoped would be powerful and easily controllable tools for their endeavours, though the two are inherently not compatible, they tried grafting body parts of demons on humans to make them compatible- all experiments failed except for her, more or less, though she never got to see the hybrid she carried and was then told it had died too, they threw her out believing she wouldnt survive much longer either and all such experiments were cancelled due to the high cost of human life, research material (demons are still rare) and upkeep with no successful results Lady 13 survived though (perhaps even via the pirates picking her up?) and she ended up living in said small village far away, hiding her half demonic body, though most know there soemthing 'wrong' with her (her being this tall when it doesnt fit the rest for one), only few know the full extent; she enjoys the life she has now, perhaps on the more poor side but safer and more loved than ever before; she largely lead the efforts to try and help Eadrya when they ended up in the harbor, though there wasnt that much anyone could do it was still enough- they leave immediately after waking up, but return after really having nowhere to go and struggling to deal with everything that has happened; over time (probably years) they start to open up towards the people there (though not .. very much) enough to get rather close with Lady 13 too- she actually falls madly in love but after Eadrya (extremely aro/ace) rejects all her attempts quite clearly she respects their boundaries
However, after hearing news of potential demon sightings Eadrya decides to leave in hopes of not being the last demon left after all; Lady 13 then decides to reveal her secret to them (though hearing and seeing what lengths hunters would go to for their experiments makes them absolutely seething with rage- she insists on not being out for revenge) and asks if they would be willing to donate a small amount of heartblood; shes always wanted to be a mother but is now incompatible with humans too- through things she picked up back at the experiments facillity, hers and her doctors research she is sure that is all that is needed, she dares to ask since she does not know when, if ever, she will meet another demon, much less one she could actually trust enough for this though Eadrya hesitates (why would she want to go through the same thing again that didnt work and threatened her life, if it does work, do they want to be involved with any of this? what if hunters find out it worked after all?) but after her ensuring that they would have no part in it other than giving up a little blood and would not be considered a parent in any way, nor made responsible for anything that might happen to her, but considering it all in the end they agree to it
only for her to reveal shes had a small bottle of it already, along with multiple samples of the other types, which she collected when Eadrya was bleeding out into the harbor not knowing if they will survive, though not wanting to make use of it without their consent either way (they are actuallly rather touched by this)
alot later the main group returns here and it turns out to have worked (though she is unable to walk/bedridden for a long while bc it did alot of damage to her body, which can heal since its demons parts, but only really slowly bc she does not have a full functioning system and no demonic blood of her own -she uses the other samples for the healing process-) though its a little awkward to explain, especially considering that 13.1 took alot after Eadrya xD (their theory as to why it worked so "well" that time is that even though the sample was already taken, them giving their consent for it still made it less likely to be rejected; demons dont need partners to have offspring, and all can do it, they just have to decide to- so them agreeing to it, even though its long been outside their body, still had an effect on the blood sample)
#ganondoodles#art#ocs#original art#oc lore#demons#monsters#WHY does writing things liek this take me so long#i spent two hours again on this and im falling asleep as we speak bc its almost 2 am#ANYWAY this was alot again ... sorry#but its a relatively new storyline that i have been afraid of telling#since it touches on things im afraid might come across wrong and uses themes im a lil uncomfy with#but i found it interesting ... and works well with eadrya as a character bc it challenges alot about them#yes im wrote and mean this genuinely#i would have made the cut from her human body to the demon parts more smooth ... but this hard cut is the point#so that she looks rather normal on the upper part and can hide the rest#thoguh im unsure about the color scheme and if maybe i should be more creative with the demons parts#then again its largely just legs lol#if anyone actually reads this ........ i hope it comes across correctly#i like to use darker and more mature themes but am riddled with anxiety over how it will be understood#im gonna work on zelda comic stuff again now .. sorry for all the oc spam#but if there are questions PLEASE feel free to ask im pretty sure i have answers to almosst anything?#also i havent thought of a name for her or the kid .. though im starting to like lady 13#13.1 wont do as a name though poor kid deserves a proper name after already being a weird hybrid that shouldnt exist#either way ... going to bed now GOODNIGHT q-q#(any typos are excused by me being deadly tired ok)
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the lesser known did symptom of not knowing anything about your life because not only do you not remember anything (and the memories you Do have are heavily fragmented so you have no idea when they occured), but you also consistently destroy all traces of yourself during dissociative episodes. rip every diary ive tried to keep and almost every social media account. i will never know what i got up to or who i was during those years
i have a spreadsheet i use for documenting memories that turn up before i can forget them again. where i also do my best to estimate what year or season or month they came from. but its all just such a mess. even 2021 onwards which are supposed to be my therapy years are very very patchy. i wish i could just know my life
#kostik speaks#having a moment#is it fucked up that the vast majority of what i can place on my life timeline is directly lifted from the internet archive#where i desperately try to remember old urls and see if any evidence of my existence has been immortalised#just so i can know what i was doing. and who i was. and what i was going through. when.#anyway#im so upset about how much evidence of myself ive destroyed now that im finally trying to put the pieces together#just because i refused to accept that was me and i took it upon myself to delete the old mes from existence#over and over again#because reading what id written and identifying with who i was was immensely dysphoric and distressing#any sort of life history is just. not there#i try very hard but i rely a lot on other people and archives that i cant wipe myself#because otherwise the pieces of my memory just dont work and none of it makes sense#its tough#just had to ask my mother when my grandmother died#it was really not long ago#because it was a significant event. i have a memory fragment of learning the news. i have no idea when it was though#maybe learning the time of year will explain some things. heres to hoping#im venting ignore me#i must have asked her before already but! youll never guess. i forgot#so i asked again and this time ill get it on the spreadsheet#so maybe i can build up a small timeline of that section of the year around that date#thats what im hoping. heres to hoping
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idk if it's obvious but in the forsy offseason training vid the reporter asks "how do your legs feel, you know, for a man who, well, some see as a greek god" and forsy is just hand on hip staring off fondly in the distance he knows damn well who some is like even at home he's never living that ekky thirst quote down linked together forever just how ekky drew it up
OH YOU GOTTA BE FUCKING KIDDING ME
MAN HAUNTED BY HIS PARTNERS HORNINESS EVEN IN SWEDEN IM GONNA CRY EKKY LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE THIS MAN IS GETTING HARASSED IN HIS OWN HOMETOWN OH MY GOD CAN HE NOT HAVE PEACE
#ask#gustav forsling#aaron ekblad#florida panthers#oh i didnt know that ty^^!! i dont speak swedish so i was just fondly looking at him while not processing a single thing#thank you for this nugget anon i owe you my life 🙇♂️🙇♂️#“some” guys we have to start pointing fingers no one fucking else has started this train but EKKY himself#we have to bring shame back#its august icb forsys still being haunted by this EKKY SAID THIS BACK IN FEBRUARY OH MY GOD 😭😭😭#“linked together forever just how ekky drew it up” hes a true mastermind on a different plane of existence 🙂↕️🙂↕️#forget this haunting forsy its gonna HAUNT ME#the little chuff he makes...okay#do you think about the way he was looking away from the reporter but as they said “grekisk gud” made eyecontact#and then immediately averted his eyes and starts fiddling as he says his answers. yeah me too.#IM CRYING IM GONNA THINK ABOUT THIS FOREVER FORSBLAD IN THE OFFSEASON IS THRIVING FOR SOME REASON#i hope hockeyreference eventually updates and puts greek god on his profile#hell i hope his non-english wikipedia articles update and put greek god in the nickname section#like at this point...
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