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ravenspacemaker · 7 years

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my coming out story (its kinda odd)

all inspired by the great @bugguhl

okay so just some background, me and my dad have a super strong relationship like hes probably one of my best friends and im his favorite child (its obvious). also im a girl (in case u didnt know).

basically ever since i was a little kid i loved boys. when i was like four i told a waiter at a restaurant that i thought he was handsome, and there were so many other stories my grandparents/parents have told me since i was little about my love for boys. elementary school was pretty ordinary. i was one of those 4th/5th grade hoes who was a serial dater and dated all the boys in the class. like obv those arent real relationships or anything, but i was boy crazy from a very young age.

after i finished elementary school, i started going to a private school for middle school, starting in 6th grade (mainly because my bff was going there but my parents liked that i was gonna be in an upscale and controlled environment or whatever idk). i continued my boy crazy ways in middle school but this is the first time i really remember being into girls. i was the new kid (the school went from pre-nursery which is like for 2 year olds up until 12th grade so many people have been there all their lives) so i was meeting everyone in my grade of like 25 kids for the first time. i was like entranced by these two girls who i’ll call catherine and jessica. they were just both so pretty and i was just in love with them. through my people-pleasing ways i managed to become really close friends with the two of them (again, the grade had 25 kids, so it wasnt hard making friends). nothing really ever happened with them, but this is when i started thinking it was possible i wasnt fully straight. also, around this time i discovered porn lol, and i started becoming fascinated with just girls. however, i still refused to admit i was anything but straight (this probably is because when i was a little kid we had a lesbian in my family but my family didnt know if id understand what that meant so they told me that it was normal for girls to be attracted to other girls soooo i think my young brain just couldnt comprehend that even more)

eventually at the end of 7th grade i started wanting to leave private school just because i missed all my old friends so i went back to my public school for 8th grade. early in 8th grade i started reconnecting with my old friends from elementary school, and at lunch i reconnected with this girl who ill call wanda (im trying to keep the names somewhat similar and she had a weird W name im sorry lmao). me and wanda ended up becoming super close, and she introduced me to her whole friend group. they were all super beautiful girls, kinda like those cliche gorgeous girls u see in movies.

as we got older, our “clique” kinda got stronger and stronger, and when we got to high school we befriended two new girls who were equally gorgeous. me and wanda had become best friends at this point too. when i was in high school i guess u could say i was a party girl. my friend group partied a lot, but like mostly with other groups. and basically all of us had boyfriends a lot of the time, but i knew deep down that i was really attracted to wanda and i wished that i could date her. also, at this age i knew what bisexuality was and probably knew that was what i am, but it was like trendy to call the ugly girls lesbians with these girls i was friends with (ik its horrible), so i was scared to really say anything about it.

junior year i was dating this guy who we’ll call eric. i was kinda a terrible girlfriend, and eric ended up dumping me because of this. and so afterwards we went out to a party and me and wanda both got pretty fucked up. we went into some bedroom together and just started joking about how we were done with boys (her and her bf had recently split too) and she was like “lol what if i kissed u”. so basically we kissed, and then we both started doing that annoying drunk laughing about how we were “lesbians”. we did some other stuff too and that was that.

afterwards, we both knew we did stuff the night before and i think each of us were happy about it, but we thought the other would be ashamed so we were super awkward. eventually she just texted me and tried to be cool about it and joked around or whatever. but eventually we decided that there was actually something more to this and decided to go out on a “date”. as i was walking out the door that night my dad asked me where i was going so i told him i was going on a date, and he asked me what his name was, so i just said “her name”. he was a little shocked i could tell, but all he said was just “oh okay, have fun”. idk why i was so upfront like that cuz that really isnt like me at all, but im happy i was.

anyways so me and wanda like lowkey dated in the closet for a month, but it wasnt anything serious and i think both of us were kinda just hurting from getting dumped. we ended up deciding to just be friends but things were weird because we were the only ones who knew what had happened between us and everyone in school thought we were just bffs. i never actually came out publicly, in high school. during my senior year i found a new friend group and was open about being bisexual with them and it wasnt a big deal or anything, but i never publicized it to the whole school. when i went to college i started introducing myself openly as bisexual. i never really told my family about it but they all either know via my dad (hes a loudmouth) or have no reason to know until i begin a real relationship with a girl.

honestly this story is pretty underwhelming now that ive written out the whole thing im so sorry for wasting ur time. also if ur wondering if ive ever been with girls after this, yes i have but i havent dated any (im willing if i find the right one though lmao).

#bb19 #i didnt think this would be so long im sorry it shouldve been multiple parts #also i fucking hate wanda now so this story angered me at parts lmao #also ik i made stupid decisions in high school u dont need to rub it in #coming outgate

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flockofdoves · 2 years

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my day was like . awful stuff sandwiching a really nice time with friends

this was also after the frustration with medical care and trying to be able to hear normally again this morning

got in a car accident. id never done anything beyond bumping a car while parking before so that was really scary and i think will be shaking up me while im driving for a while. both me and the other person are totally fine and so does their car and mine just had my license plate have a bolt fall off so its crooked and bent a bit

but i just feel really awful and was so shakey earlier. my car has a bad transmission so sometimes if it gets stuck in a low gear when im merging onto a road or getting to speed after being stopped i have to really push on the gas for a second so i can make sure that cars behind me wont be at risk of hitting me

so i did that while turning right from my apartments driveway onto the one lane highway its right off of. but like 500 ft ahead of that there was a car and by the time i realized it was stopped and really pressed down on the breaks i still ended up hitting it (i also dont think my ABS started? which is a bit concerning i should look into that. but maybe my memory is being weird) and after getting out of the car i was like ‘oh my god im so sorry this is all my fault’ and also admitted fault when the cop came and gave the person my info but they didnt give me theirs.

and like. it definitely was the vast majority my fault i should have paid better attention and reacted quicker

but also the more i think about it like. this person said to the cop ‘i had my warning lights on to pick up food from the restaurant across the street’. in the moment hearing that i was like. oh my god how did i not see their warning lights and just think they were a moving car im so stupid’ but now i wonder like. maybe they didnt even have them on? literally no way to know and regardless i shouldve been more aware of my surroundings. but also like. regardless of if warning lights were on and that im responsible for the accident after the fact thinking about it im like. why the hell would you stop with your warning lights on in a one lane each direction road with a high speed limit just to pick up food when the restaurant to the left literally has a parking lot. wild choice to make.

also freaked out for a bit bc i didnt have my up to date insurance policy but ig its still the same i just had a print out from before it was renewed a couple months ago but nonetheless panicked in the moment

and then the cop said to go online to find the accident report so i did that right when i got home but it said it required a nonrefundable $20 fee to just search for a report with whatever info you filled out and no opportunity to give multiple options for what to search. and then after i promptly did that assuming hopefully since he told me to do it right after i got home its 90 day meant that it would update me over the next few months. but no lmao i got this email right after. feeling like the joker

ig time to either continually pay $20 to do this promptly or call the police departments office which is closed til tuesday and i bet has hours similar to when ill be in work

oh also after id eased a bit at driving by being with friends in the car on me and my gfs way back from dropping off a friend at night then a cop in a nearby town pulled me over on an empty road like ‘your plate is crooked also your license plate light on the back is burnt out’ and the second part is likw. literally im from out of state as you can see on my license plates can you even enforce that here i didnt think that was a thing in every state and no ones ever pulled me over for it before

i was planning on going to drive 2.5 hours to rhide island tonight and then 2.5 back tomorrow to go see family since i have a long weekend at work and my brother and mom just got back to rhode island but obvs not doing that tonight now. i wanted to sleep on it to feel less shaken up about everything. but now after i got pulled over im not even sure about tomorrow. i guess that was my warning so i might get a ticket or whatever if i dont find out how to fix all that stuff asap :(

#cpost #car crashes -

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icharchivist · 3 years

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cries think I made my ask too long so like half of it got deleted bc I typed it right into the askbox. anyways. I come bearing a3 thoughts! at first i was gonna watch the spring/summer and autumn/winter ones and then give my thoughts on both but. turns out i had too many thoughts lol? which i shouldve expected but i actually kind of... got bored by the first two chapters of this event! so i skipped and went to the stranger. and then went back. (1/?)

and then i got to like "tsuzuru and kazunari are having a fight?" and jumped on that like a starving wolf bc helllll yeah! i rly adored kazunari in sardine search, i think he was great! hes just so nice and has good vibes. he and taichi are kind of similar i feel? but i think their respective ages contribute to a lot of difference in their characters. why does it feel like this askbox limit personally wants me dead. (2/?)

anyways! i rly enjoyed the improv scene devolving to a real fight. admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event... it was still good tho. the scene i mean. (3/?)

also i rly liked tenma ragging on them afterwards. like he was mean but. first i adore tenma. second he just felt like. a different meddling type to muku lol? like the vibes he gave me were always like... im going to be a considerate leader and watch out for the ppl under me! therefore im gonna make sure theyre doing fine! aggressively. i think tenmas also just like a friendly person who likes to take care of others in general? like im not saying hes omi or anything but just like. (4/?)

that time he offers his car ride to juza so they can go to school together like hes surprisingly open compared to his initial prickliness. also ive got thoughts abt the tenma juza SSR conversation thing i read. one day ill make a tenma and juza fic and complete a trifecta haha... but thats something for another day! back to the actual story. the way tsuzuru dives right in after kazunari! that was so nice. like its easy to see how much they care abt each other. (5/?)

to the point where like even while theyre fighting theyre like angry but still like fairly quiet bc i think theyre both at least trying to be considerate of each other. ah the moment kazunari didnt respond to tsuzuru trying to talk to him i KNEW he was sick tho. felt proud of myself for calling that one but also the reason i knew is bc i have used the "character being sick during an argument causing them both to make up with each other" trope myself before so uh. like recognizes like haha. (6/?)

anyways the cg there was fuckin beautiful like kazunari looks so sad in the middle bit but then u see his shy smile? like hes sick but hes also like. happy to be there. idk. lovely. i adore kazu i think hes just deeply sweet to other people. tsuzuru telling him "you make everyone around you feel as bright and cheery as the things you design” is so wonderful too (7/?)

now im thinking. ah tsuzuru probably feels quite drained after a script and such (i know i am when i finish any piece--its like the emotions just rush out of me) so i like to think that like yknow. kazunari dropping by his room or whatever helps him set himself back to normal! but also when tsuzurus like oh u left ur magazines here! i suddenly remembered. wait shit kazunari and tsuzuru arent even roommates. wonder how much they bother masumi lmaooo. anyways overall very good story! (8/?)

some more thoughts: itaru and citron were so cute in this event! just like. citron saying itaru winking makes his heart skip a beat and itaru quoting citrons wrong sayings (which. i am also guilty of today i told my brother "we'll jump that bridge when we cross it" so) also i love how yuki is like "thank god i wasnt partnered with that hack" but like. yuki. u could literally just not talk about him. like its so funny to me yuki is like wow i hate tenma but he wont shut up abt him haha (9/?)

i also was a lil taken aback at hearing itaru go "for the lulz" tbh... like it fits him. but im mad it fits him? anywaysss thats all i had for this one! im gonna watch autumn/winter and go say my thoughts on that soon. sorry the ask was so broken up, idk what happened!

OLA FRIEND! Glad to see your thoughts again omg :3c

tho omg the fact tumblr deleted it all + the ask limit was all so evil D: poor friend.

I'm putting my answer under a read more because. Well. *waves hand* it got long.

The non-play events can be perhaps a little harder to get into because unlike the plays events that you start with a clear idea of at least the main plot (re: "they are preparing a play, i know the leads so i know who it will focus on"), non-plays events take a little longer to first set up what event they're participating in, how to prepare for it, and then bring up the conflict and which characters are going to have something to do with said conflict. So i can understand that they're a little harder to get into when we know the plays awaits.

On top of that, the first few events still were a bit tame because since it was early when the app released, i think they didn't go too heavy at once in case some people were still stuck on earlier chapters (esp since especially Winter is hard to unlock)

ANYWAY glad that it sucked you in on the second read :3c

So glad you were invested in that conflict!

Totally agreeing with you about Kazunari, and very good point about Taichi as well! they aren't the Puppy Pair for nothing :'D (Yuki took one look at both of them together and just Knew. His suffering knows no end (lovingly)). But yeah i think they have a lot in common, they both are the really bright and friendly figure, both also started in overcompensating a bit because both wanted to be popular in some ways.

But we do have, on one hand, Kazunari who wanted that rather late in his life while Taichi always thrived for that, the fact Kazunari made friends easily and it's just that he was scared of getting to the next level, while Taichi always struggled with this quest for popularity. In a way too both of them were at least scared to share a part of them, Kazunari worrying to show his thoughts, and Taichi being a spy and all of that... which impacts them really differently considering the guilt it puts on Taichi. And then you add their age into the mix, especially the fact Kazu is the oldest of his troupe and Taichi the youngest of his, it makes them fairly similar all while being fairly different.

both are so interesting to me and i love them bothhh, so it's always nice to see them have focus.

admittedly i was kinda surprised that the content of that improv wasnt rly too similar to their actual fight? like normally a3 has the story of the play run parallel to like the actual real character drama so i thought the improv might function as the play in this event

i love how you are seeing the patterns a3 tends to do it's so neat!

It's true the fight isn't really similar to their actual fight, though i do love that they had "swapped" their personality for the act and ended up insulting each other for theirr swapped personality. Like, Kazunari insulted part of himself in Tsuzuru's character and Tsuzuru did the same?? and then the fight escalated and the way Kazunari broke character hurts bc it's really that Tsuzuru hit where it hurts. But yeah it still wasn't too relevent to their actual fight, though i think the thing is that their fight was as such mostly because they tend to clash often due to their personalities rather than just this singular reason why, so to have the play go more "it's their personalities the problem" kinda hurt lol. But yeah still agreed that it didn't reflect much on the plot itself

I was rereading the improv bit to answer correctly and man since we're going to talk about Tenma next, i just. Love that when Kazunari, breaking character, his eyes sad, tells Tsuzuru "you have no rights talking to me like that..." it then cuts on Tenma being upset. Bc like. Exactly like you say, he wants to look out for the people under him. and like. Kazunari is his friend. A friend he also snapped at once and insulted for being who he was, so he probably could have relived a bit of his fight with Kazunari seeing those two fights; Except that now Kazunari is one of his closest friend and he doesn't like that.

Also like. It was also because he could still hide under the plot of the improv but it's so rare, and it never happened before that point, that Kazunari stands for himself in a "the way you treat me is unfair"? Like again re: his fight with Tenma, when Tenma snapped at him, while Tenma was unfair with him, Kazunari took the blame, called himself annoying and all yaknow?

The fact Kazunari is starting to accept that he can take more place for himself is something the whole Summer Troupe have been trying to help him work on, but especially Tenma. Tenma is always there trying to push Kazunari to say what he means, to express his feelings, to stop hiding.

And for once, Kazunari does that in front of everyone... and it's because he's breaking because of his fight with Tsuzuru.

I think Tenma probably felt it was even more of a reason to get involved like, this is the thing he's been working on with Kazunari about, and now he's being all hurt about it, not on Tenma's watch!

And i totally agree with your take on Tenma! (and would LOVE to read the Tenma and Juza fic once you get to it :3c). I think, Tenma is really caring and is trying to take a place as a caretaker and all, but unlike Omi, he has absolutely no reference for it.

Omi is the eldest of multiple brothers and everything indicates his parents have always been lovely to him. Add to it how he ended up leader of a delinquent crew he was clearly looking after, Omi has a history of taking care of people, of nurturing them, and he knows what he's doing. Meanwhile Tenma grew up on TV sets, mostly surrounded by adults and not by people his age, mostly getting advice from being ordered around by directors i think. And his parents are distant, hyperfocused on their job, not really nursing with him. So Tenma meanwhile really didn't have a family emotional support and was in situation where he couldn't befriend other kids his age. His only reference was probably Igawa (his agent) and i think for a long time he didn't exactly see it, and Igawa remained mostly professional so there was probably the idea of it not being sincere? That Tenma had to grow out of.

So like, they're both extremely nurturing and caring, but my point is that Omi has experiences in it and is at ease with it, while Tenma has been so alone and in places were he had no support system that even if he wants to support others, he still struggles with how to do it because he has no set exemple. And that's his development in the main story arc, to learn from how Izumi shows she cares in order to care back at them all.

Like i mean the way Tenma yelled at them about their mistakes at first feel like he would have picked it up from some directors on TV set yaknow? Probably hearing them say that with no consequences on others actors, seeing it worked, didn't think "that's an abuse of power and the actors probably all think badly of their director for that" but "wow that works", tried it on his troupesmates and realized this is... not how that works. And it's spending time watching how Izumi encourages them that have him fix his way to approach it.

So yeah i got lost too into it but like. I feel you on Tenma i love him so much and i love his development so to see him get pissed and involved there? was really nice. even if he was aggressive about it. He's still learning.

ANYWAY back to Tsuzuru and Kazunari, totally agree with what you say next. They still care a lot about each other and yeah they're at a point where this consideration they have for each other make their anger more quiet than trying to attack one another (Banri could NEVER-). so yeah totally agree with you!

DLKFJDLKF i LOVE the reasoning on "recognizing that Kazunari was sick". Your writer's powers making you see through... *coughs* unlike Tsuzuru....

AND YEAH ALL YOU SAY ABOUT THE CG.. YEAH. Kinda crying thinking about it again now LDKJFLKDJF It's just. Everything about it is so soft and tender. The things Tsuzuru tells Kazunari are soo so sweet sobs. They're just adorable i love those kids. and also i feel you for Kazu he's just that great huh?

The whole set up about Kazu dropping by his room is so so cute! I love it! Like probably the very first time Tsuzuru braces himself because "oh no i'm not in the mood to stand mister hyperenergy himself" but Kazunari quickly adjust his energy so that Tsuzuru can just recharge without being overwhelmed. Yes it would drive Masumi completely nuts. Which i think is a plus for Tsuzuru like, hey, if Masumi gets annoyed once in a while it's a win. But yeah also i think that Tsuzuru and Kazunari should really have the Artistic Soldiarity of Students in Art school Probably Working Until Very Late To Complete Their Projects. Would love if at the end Tsuzuru gave it back yaknow?

but yeah their story was really nice i'm so glad you liked it! :D

oh god yeah Itaru and Citron were SO cute in it too, i also love the comments Citron makes about Itaru's winks. Just there flirting in front of everyone like those two embarrassing friends huh. (probably with Muku being all starry eyes considering he greatly admires both Itaru and Citron and, well, Romance.). And yeah i love how Itaru ends up so much into Citron's rhythm (and this idiom you said? is glorious actually, 10 points for you)

DLKFJDLKF what a call out toward Yuki. "yes i hate Tenma,no i won't shut up about him, also if YOU say you hate Tenma i'm going to stab you with my needles, have a nice fucking day.". I love their dynamics so much aha

And yeah Itaru is there cursing us the whole time with the fact he's the greatest nerd ever and it fits him perfectly. It makes me laugh so hard.

Thank you so much for having shared your thoughts there! it's always a blast to read through them and i dearly enjoyed it! (+ it makes me relive the event a little and it makes me soft!)

I'm so glad you enjoyed it! So glad you had so many thoughts about all of this, what a blast.

thank you for sharing, and looking forward the Autumn/Winter reactions :3c

Take care!

#ichareply #ichafantalks a3 #sonnets of beauty

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urmomification · 4 years

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SWAG ANOTHER DREAM SMP AU FIC IDEA THAT ILL NEVER WRITE POG

this is a very long post please im so sorry my brain it just

(tw for like slight possession n shit)

(sorry its all jumbled i write all of these in discord to my friend and copy paste them here please if u have questions ask me im always willing to talk abt this shit please it haunts me)

(context: i saw a tiktok abt the hc that both dream and techno are gods of some sort bc theyre mentioned in the tales of the smp by karl a time traveller and my brain just ran w it)

going back to the techno and dream are gods thing right so dream is a vessel for the god dream xd (??? work in progress youll know what im talking about at some point its really funny tho uve def seen clips of it) and he was possessed?? by the god after the server started (when he started going from super friendly with everyone to control/power hungry) when he started sacrificing everything for power so no one could have power over him? that was the god making him do it bc the god was terrified of not being in control since theyd lost it all to techno in their past. thats why we never see dream and techno fight and why we see dream extend help and support to him at times as well as respecting his boundaries and such bc theyre scared of techno (again w the best of 10 duel reference, techno killed the god in a past life which is why the god has been forced to use a human vessel to get anything done on the mortal plane) but when something that powerful spends pretty much any amount of time in something mortal and mundane like a person, the host body starts to change (hence the mask) i like to think that the god would be akin to that of a biblically correct angel?? like the ones w multiple eyes n shit yk so after time things start to happen to normal dreams body he gets extra sets of eyes and he gets taller and overall his body seems just Too Small for whatevers inside of him and thats why he (hc) started wearing the mask in the first place he knew something was wrong w him but he didnt want anyone to know even tho they would most likely help him he was ashamed that he was different in the first place so he started wearing the mask once the other eyes showed up. and i think that the god would talk to dream similarly to how technos voices work yk? except its just the one voice instead of many many small ones. and again with the mask thing when he lost to tommy and they took him in, part of his mask broke to the point where u could see just a bit of the right side of his face but enough to see that it Wasnt Right there were two eyes where there shouldve been one and spots on his cheeks bright enough to resemble stars and where the color of his pupil should have been is just a sickeningly neon green with nothing else behind it. so they let him keep the mask even tho they already know something is wrong but it clearly makes him Very Distressed when asked to remove the mask or told to give it up. blah blah blah god harassing its host bc it got them caught and thrown in a prison and dream goes ever so slightly insane having to share a mind and body with a literal ancient god w a vendetta against everything hes built whos forced him to sacrifice everything he loved and cared for out of fear yk the usual prison shit and then techno comes a long and breaks him out or whatever but on their way back to his house he drops a really cryptic line abt how 'its nice to see an old friend again' and 'i thought i got rid of u for good last time' and dream is just ???? what are u talking about?? weve never been friends and youve never gotten rid of me? what. until techno spins around and just 'im not talking to you im talking to the thing inside u' or whatever and dreams eyes flash some brilliant gold or sumn and boom this is ur fellow god speaking how may i help you and dream xd (that feels so wrong to say but) and techno bond or well ig just talk abt how the past centuries have gone and ig while xd is fronting (??? i think itd kinda be like DID in a sense w multiple people being able to front yk?) dream is in a sort of semi conscious state but still hears everything going on around his own body until hes thrown back into the drivers seat (i think that xd would only be able to front for short periods of time due to the vessel n shit that makes sense right) and hes so confused someone please help him hes just a dude who happened to get possessed by a god someone help him so when they finally get back to technos house he sits dream down and explains the best he can without literally melting dreams brain. which would also play into the 'technoblade never dies' bc hes. literally a god. mortals cant kill him unless they have idk some sort of super weapon idk and blah blah blah xd gets what they want and finally has the ability to leave finally leaving dream literally the shell of a man with no home friends materials or anything with techno to basically take care of him until he reaches some semblance of stability again (which would take ages, realistically (wdym realistically) going from normal, to a god sharing a body with you and speaking in you brain living as a single being together and hearing their thoughts, to back to normal but with all the memories of what you did and what they made you do and also no more god speaking in ur head it would take a hot sec to recover from) so he lives with techno (whos, not to mention, another god) for a while until he can fend for himself again and after a good year or so passes and no one hears from dream they start to look for him and see what happened bc he went from the biggest threat on the server to just. gone. no one knows where he went after whatever he did and they want closure. is he dead?? who knows. so george and sap set out looking for him and decide to ask techno for help since hes good w directions n shit also he was the last person to see dream alive so he might have an idea of where he is and they walk up to his house and knock on his door and techno opens it and just stares at them he knows who they are, dreams talked about them before but hes never met them really so he talks to them, getting through the polite hellos how are yous before sap finally asks 'do you know what happened to dream? no one knows where he went and we just want closure' techno huffs and tells them to wait there he (this is the basement door im using his arctic tundra house in my head) goes down the ladder to the second basement, they can hear him talking to multiple people (ranboo phil dream) but cant tell who everyone is before coming back up the ladder, back to the door. he tells them to wait outside he needs to get something first (its dream hes getting dream) theyre standing out by carls stable when the door creaks open and dream steps out looking around for who the fuck could possibly be looking for them he betrayed everyone and most people thought he was dead who could possibly be here asking for himself and not ranboo or philza and when he steps out, his green hoodie (memento made by ranboo to help him cope w the loss of the voice in his head) catching the morning light off the snow and he was happy and then he saw them standing by the house hed grown to call home at least for now he breaks. he missed them so so much it hurt. he never expected to see them ever again much less them come looking to see him but hes scared he realizes he doesnt know what to say there is nothing to say he fucked them all over he ruined everything and then hes being hugged. they missed him too. they dont forgive him jsut yet but they missed him and thats enough for him right now. the three of them stand there just being in each others presences and techno creaks the door open to make sure they arent trying to kill each other and sighs and leans against the frame smiling. hes happy again and thats the best he can do for him. he invites them all in and offers to explain everything to them to try and ease the blame off of dream bc in all honesty it was his fault but xd made it far far worse that it should have been (a bit late but foot note abt xd i think that they would be an idle god until someone w intense feelings of powerlessness and insecurity like awoke them from their techno induced slumber and inhabited dream to help him fulfill his desires for power and control) and by the time he and dream are finished its late at night and sap and george are ??? so u were possessed by a god who techno killed centuries ago in a duel and it amplified ur feelings of insecurity and ur thirst for control to the point of isolating urself from us and destroying everything everyone cared abt?? also technos an ancient god who lusts for bloodshed but also makes turtle farms in his free time?? are we getting this right????? and techno and dream are just yea thats abt it glad this all made sense then they all go to bed (its a small house dream has a lil shack like ranboos and sap and george somehow slept over there for the night) and in the morning sap and george leave again but promise to come back, they still arent ready to forgive and forget bc even tho it wasnt all his fault his emotions getting away from him is what caused this all in the first place so they do need time to process now that they know he isnt dead and dream continues to live near techno in almost full independence and eventually moves back with his friends even tho many still hate him. hes happy and for now thats enough. another foot note; even after xd leaves his being, he still has the extra eyes, glowy freckles n is xtra tall n shit that cant just be reversed but now that hes himself again these things take their tolls on human bodies so i think hed have something at least similar to arthritis bc of how his bones were literally manipulated bc of how strong ethereal magic or whatever is. so he would still wear the broken mask but he takes it off now and is ok with it being off hes working on getting better now that hes himself again and everyone living w/by techno is helping him with that. also i think that he would get blinks of xd's memories like from when techno was killing them and have sumn like ptsd panic attacks from it and techno feels super guilty abt it but theres literally nothing he can do except apologize and after the first few times dream stopped him from apologizing bc it is his fault but he didnt do it to him so it doesnt matter to dream at least and they live in pretty much harmony until dream finally moves back in w george and sap the end. he also started wearing the mask in the first place bc of the extra eyes but he played it off as being uncomfortable around new people and not wanting them to know what he looked like until he trusted them (bc that literally makes sense irl how funky is that) so sap and george never pushed him and when they caught him without it on on the rare occasion they wouldnt pressure him to leave it off or anything even tho they already knew what he looked like (when they respect ur boundaries </3) they just assumed that it was insecurity (it was but also mans had like 3 eyes so) and just left him alone

#dream smp #long post under cut #dream mcyt #technoblade #dream xd #i love dream xd their concept is literally so fucking funny to me #this idea hit me like a train at 11pm and i wrote from 12:04am to 1:02am scribbling this down in dms on discord to my friend whos asleep #fic au idea #i should start a whole tag of that wanna bet how many posts would be there #edit: there are #2064 words and #10582 characters under the cut #what the fuck #is we fuckin doin

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thotticus---prime · 6 years

Text

Peter Parker’s Potential Perish

It was dark, and cold, and cramped. Just where in the world was he? Peter woke up disoriented, and it didn’t help that Karen was listing off his numerous injuries as he slowly came to. The first thing he noticed was that he couldn’t move his arms much, maybe a few inches or so before he hit solid concrete on all sides. He tried to raise his head and see where he was, see what building was crushing him. If he had a nickel for every time he was crushed by a building, he would have two whole nickels. That’s not many nickels, but it was weird that it happened twice.

Peter didn’t have time to worry about his lack of nickels though, he was too busy trying to breath and not bleed to death. From his spot under the rubble, he could hear the ongoings of the battle above him. God, they were above him! Running on the rubble that used to be a building. The building that was slowly crushing him to death with each footstep from above.

“Cap? C-can someone get me?” Peter asked with barely enough breath to force his words out. Sure, he was strong, but he couldn’t move the rubble on top of him when his leg was practically impaled all the way through.

“Pete? Status report Spider-man, what happened, are you hurt?” Peter looked down at as much of his body he could see and hummed before shrugging, forgetting that Steve couldn’t see him.

“Kind of? I mean- I’m not going to immediately die right? But then again I could be more hurt than I know and then-”

“Peter, we’re kind of caught up with something right now, do you think you could sit tight for a few more minutes?” Peter could hear the loud shriek of someone in the background. Civilian lives were at stake, he could wait.

“Okay, Cap.”

The next time Peter was conscious enough to talk, the better part of an hour had passed. He could feel a sticky substance surrounding him, and he had a bad feeling that it wasn’t his web fluid. Luckily, the fight had moved from off of the collapsed building and down the street a little ways. He took off his mask so that he could breathe better, but that closed him off from the comm. It was for the best that he couldn’t hear the battle going on, that would only make his senses go even crazier than they already were.

He could breathe at least a little better, but the pain was too much for him to handle and soon he heard cheering in the distance. Perfect. Great. Now someone could come get him. Peter slowly pulled his mask back on so that he could communicate with the team. He could hear swearing and yelling. “Guys, what happened?”

“Nice to finally have you back Spider-man. What happened, you missed your curfew?” Clint asked sarcastically with a hint of humor in his voice.

“Not exactly Mr. Lame Sarcastic Bird Sir,” Peter immediately responded with a hint of a smile before shifting in his small space again and wincing. “But seriously, can someone come get me?”

“We’ll be there in a minute Underoos, we got moved pretty far from where this whole thing started. Can you wait a few more minutes?” “Sure Mr. Stark, I’ll stay right here.” The few minutes turned to a few more until he groaned and closed his eyes. “Mr. Stark, where are you?”

“Almost there Pete, Karen is being a little finicky right now. Something’s blocking her sensors.” He had a feeling that the thing that was making it a little hard for Karen to work was the huge hunk of metal and concrete surrounding him. “Where are you kid?”

“You know that big ass building that fell down?” Peter could hear the chorus of language over the comm. Followed by Steve’s groan but eventual laugher. He could barely hold back a small laugh of his own as he let his head rest on the cold ground beneath him, he was too tired to keep his head up and talk at the same time.

“Yeah Kiddie, I can’t see you on any rooftops though. Where are you?” Tony asked as he landed on the rubble and began to walk around, trying to spot the teen in spandex somewhere in the surrounding buildings.

Peter wheezed as he felt sudden pressure on him. “Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark! I’m right here! I’m under you, Mr. Stark!”

Suddenly he felt like a real spider getting stepped on by a boot. The chatter in his ear died down so suddenly that he thought that Karen was malfunctioning. “Hello?” He asked after a stretch of silence. Then suddenly he heard a loud groan and a curse.

“You’re joking right? Right Peter?” Steve asked. Peter could hear footsteps running as he shook his head no before remembering that no one could see him.

“No? ‘M under Mr. Stark,” he answered as he finally let his tense muscles relax and his eyes close. “C’n you guys hurry?” His words were beginning to slur as he waited and waited and waited. That’s all he could do in this situation. Wait.

The weight finally got off of his back and he could breathe just a bit better. Distantly he could hear people yelling at him, but he was too tired to respond and simply let himself fall asleep. The team was clawing at the rubble, trying to find the dumbass teen who decided that he didn’t need to tell the team that a building fell on him.

When they finally unearthed him, he looked like he was run over by a truck multiple times. But, he was still breathing, and that was all that mattered to the team as they rushed back to the compound. Those that couldn’t fly were paired with those who could, Peter being carried by Tony who was being more gentle than anyone had seen in a long time. It was understandable though, the teen had grown on everyone in the short time he had been part of the team.

Natasha was teaching him conversational Russian, Clint took him on adventures in the vents that the two of them called vadventures. Bucky constantly baked him cookies and brownies. Steve helped him train, everyone on the team had a soft spot when it came to the stupid self sacrificing teenager.

When Peter woke up, the lights were too bright and the room was too quiet. He didn’t think it was possible for any place in the compound to be completely quiet like it was in this room. Upon further examination, he found that he was in a hospital room. The other thing he noticed was that the team was sprawled out on every available surface in the room. Tony and Steve were in a pair of chairs. Bucky was on a couch next to Natasha, and Clint was surprisingly asleep on the ground in a pile with Sam and Bruce.

Tony was the first to wake up when he heard Peter start to stir. “Hey Petey-pie. You know, you gave everyone a scare,” he said conversationally as he leaned against the bed.

“Sorry, Mr. Stark.”

“You don’t need to apologize Peter, you just need to tell us when something like that happens. Why didn’t you tell anyone?”

“There were civilians who needed to get to safety, I could wait for someone to get me.”

“You could’ve told us Petey, we wouldn’t have made you stay down there if you would’ve told us how bad it was.” By then, the rest of the team had woken up and were listening to the conversation in front of them.

“I was fine, Mr. Stark. I was okay with waiting there until you were done.”

“Peter, you should’ve told us about it as soon as it happened. We’re a team so we need to know when something happens to our teammate.” Steve argued as the others nodded in agreement.

“You know what? Maybe we need a better way for you to communicate with us. You young kids like texting, why don’t you ask Karen to text one of us next time okay? We would never leave you down there for so long Peter.”

Peter sighed as he nodded guiltily and sat up in the hospital bed he was confined to. “I promise, next time a building falls on me I’ll tell someone.”

“That’s good Kiddie, but maybe let’s not make this a regular occurance,” Tony said with an uneasy expression. Peter laughed as he nodded and sat back.

“I’ll try, Mr. Stark.”

Okay so this is part one of a series called the Peter Parker Protection Program. This is kind of why the program started.

@keep-a-bucket-full-of-stars

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voidwizerd-archive · 8 years

Text

[[ "Shall we play a game?” Kankri Vantas, hurt and resentful but still in love.

part two of Wiz/Kankri logs!! the questions game ]]

valorousimperial What's your favorite color?

wiz-texts ...purple. especially dark pink n blue are tied for second

valorousimperial Your turn.

wiz-texts you mean i ask you one?

valorousimperial Yes.

wiz-texts well there we go thats it ....kiddin

valorousimperial Shh. I laughed.

wiz-texts what bout your favorite color?? i promise i wont jus be stealin your questions but colors is a good one

valorousimperial Blue, like indigo bloods. It doesn't really fit with the theme of the crown, though. The color just seems peaceful.

wiz-texts yea!!! yea indigo blue is real pretty your turn

valorousimperial If you could go anywhere, where would you go?

wiz-texts oh gosh if....... if there was a way to just.... stand on top of everythin n watch..... all of it roll out in front of you........ i would do that maybe that sounds like some kinda crazy god fantasy but i just think itd be really beautiful but since that prolly aint a doable thing

valorousimperial Considering you're some kind of crazy god, maybe it is.

wiz-texts maybe but my alternate answer would be a garden a huge huuuuuuuuuuuuge garden, w everythin in it!!!! or near everythin i love plants so much

valorousimperial Your lilacs are still overrunning mine.

wiz-texts >:0 theyre misbehavin?!!! i better give em a talkin to they aint usually growin outta their spot so, um, if you remember your dreams.... whats your favorite thing youve ever dreamed about??? for whatever reason, ha

valorousimperial They got so big!!! Mmm... My favorite dream is the one that came true. When I was young, I dreamed of freedom.

wiz-texts n you got it?

valorousimperial I don't know if I'm free. There's a lot of binding about being the emperor.

valorousimperial But at that time, freedom meant being out of my donor's control. I *did* get that.

wiz-texts holy shit thats.... thats wonderful. im so glad you got that maybe...... hm

valorousimperial ?

wiz-texts just a thought. i... hm im scared its a hurtful one so i should prolly just.... keep it to myself for now

valorousimperial If you want.

wiz-texts fuck knows you deserve a break but not yet because uh, your turn to ask a question

valorousimperial If you could change one thing that happened to you, what would you change and how?

wiz-texts ha. loaded question

valorousimperial Doesn't have to be recent.

wiz-texts problem is i dont remember like......... a lot of things. most things i cant remember what th event wouldve been but it had to have started somewhere

wiz-texts th first time my friends ever hurt me. if i could, id change it so id never have believed it was my fault

valorousimperial That's a good thing to want to change.

valorousimperial I think your whole life would have went very differently.

wiz-texts id be different thats for sure maybe less scared i guess th important thing is that i did realize it wasnt my fault or more likely someone told me bc i..... do not come easily to realizations like that on my own

valorousimperial (It was me.)

wiz-texts ....oh thats. huh. so i guess..... i still remember things i learned from you wonder what else there is um!! whats your favorite myth? or folk tale??

valorousimperial Mmmm... That's hard. Fantasy was all I had when I was growing up, so I know a lot of things. I think that probably my favorite stories were the ones that didn't have lessons - they were just full of people doing what they wanted So, ancient mythology really caught my eye. It made the gods seem troll-like, and they just did what they wanted.

wiz-texts oooooh :0

wiz-texts i keep feelin like i oughta look more at myths because so many are bout gods n thats sorta? what i am i guess??? its nice to seem em bein regular but like. actin regular except w mighty powers i guess, ha

valorousimperial Right.

wiz-texts this question thing is sorta fun actually did we play it before??

valorousimperial I agree! No!

wiz-texts we shouldve!!!!!! its.... its a fun sorta way to get to kno each other anyway um, your turn....

valorousimperial I'm thinking...

wiz-texts think fasterrrr im kiddin. take your time

valorousimperial If you could go any*when* and change any*thing* with no horrific consequences, What would it be? It doesn't even have to be something related to you, Just. Something that you want to be different.

wiz-texts well frankly i would go back to last night n smash my goddamn phone [[<BACKSPACE! BACKSPACE!!! ]] gee um all of time is a rough one to pick from

wiz-texts if theres an event that couldve stopped th game from happenin, thats what id go for but then maybe i wouldnt exist???? idk. exchangin me n a few others to save multiple universes seems like a fair trade ....whoa thats a grim answer. oops

valorousimperial From what I've heard of the game, it's not that simple. So many universes wouldn't have been *born* then, right?

wiz-texts not really. they kill a universe and in theory you get to make one maybe..... one in several million sessions actually ends in created universe

valorousimperial I thought it was only one planet that was supposed to be destroyed?

wiz-texts nah they wreck th whole shebang ....i think most of th game is fuzzy between th violence n alcohol my turn!!!!

valorousimperial Your turn!!!

wiz-texts this is sorta silly but i keep thinkin bout it so here goes: do you ever paint your nails??? if you do or dont, what colors do you think youd like?

valorousimperial I do! Lots of trolls paint their claws.

wiz-texts (that totally aint two questions its one question in.... two parts. with a bunch of extra question marks)

valorousimperial It's seen as an accentuating thing, as claws are a vital part of troll standards of beauty.

wiz-texts ooohhhhh :0

valorousimperial My favorites are matte red and metallic gold.

valorousimperial Mm... What's your favorite sort of thing to wear?

wiz-texts mm?

valorousimperial Like, Do you have a favorite type of clothing?

wiz-texts hmm.... button-up shirts. they can be comfy or stylish and i guess accessories that go w that?? though ive only recently started experimentin like watches n bow ties n cuff links also: gold rings. fr some reason i have a bunch: i think there was a party?? i vaguely recall there bein a party

valorousimperial I've had you at a few parties. Do you know how recently it was?

wiz-texts real recent. i think th rings went w a suit?? yyyyea this red n black one

wiz-texts hm. i never really thought of red as my color

valorousimperial Auriel's party.

valorousimperial It matched my suit.

wiz-texts oh my god i promise i didnt mean to diss th color red!!!! i jus figured since i already got th pink thing goin, itd b a bit too much??? so i never wore it ...guess i changed my mind

valorousimperial You came to the party as my quadrant, so you probably decided to just match me.

wiz-texts speakin of clothes, um.... i hope this is an okay question do u wear gloves a lot or somethin???? i know i never rly do but there are a bunch of gloves in my sylladex

valorousimperial ...

wiz-texts all like, really nice material n stuff. black or white. some are gray. um. are they yours??

valorousimperial Oh. They're for my psionic. I always forget gloves, but whenever I touch other people, I feel their emotions. I guess you were preparing for me.

wiz-texts i guess so... ill um, ill keep em in th 'dex if thats alright. in case you need em n im round.....

valorousimperial Alright. ... What were you thinking earlier?

wiz-texts heck

valorousimperial Sorry.

wiz-texts thats kinda... um sorry in advance if this is upsettin?? sorry

valorousimperial I know I said I wouldn't ask, but the curiosity is killing me.

wiz-texts what you were sayin bout freedom made me wonder if.... if maybe freedom had somethin to do with why i made that choice

valorousimperial ... Free of what? Of me?

wiz-texts no!!!! no i mean th scars!! they can be....... bindin

wiz-texts in a real bad way

valorousimperial ...mm. I know about that.

wiz-texts you do???

valorousimperial Yes.

wiz-texts im kinda surprised, i thought round here scars are considered attractive n all that

valorousimperial They are.

wiz-texts (...did you tell me that?)

valorousimperial (Yes.)

wiz-texts (okay)

wiz-texts um... whose turn is it??

valorousimperial It's mine.

wiz-texts oh okay

valorousimperial Wait, No, it's yours.

wiz-texts 0o0 tbh i shoulda asked this first because Super Important what....... is........ your opinion on purrbeasts?

valorousimperial !! We went on a date to a cat cafe

valorousimperial I brought home four of them!

wiz-texts you took me to a cat cafe?? :0

valorousimperial You took ME to a cat cafe!

wiz-texts *what* no way.... where did i get that kinda initiative omfg more importantly!!! there's FOUR MORE KITTIES round here somewhere????? i gotta meet emmm

valorousimperial ?? Shouldn't you remember the cats? They love you.

wiz-texts i guess they were too close to you. i mean now that i think bout it i sorta remember???? but its fuzzy like th ball w that Auriel lady

valorousimperial Their names are Mushik, Halmim, Romila, and Vessin.

wiz-texts that sounds bout right..... yea, bout right i took you out to a cat cafe n you adopted four. wow your turrrn

valorousimperial My question WAS going to be if you DID remember the cat cafe, but that answers that. What's your favorite dessert?

wiz-texts i think it might be milkshakes!! i only tried em recently but theyre super yummy (least favorite is anythin with squash. especially pumpkin)

valorousimperial (Even pumpkin spice milkshakes?)

wiz-texts (i ate nothin but pumpkins for so long....... so so long =_="")

wiz-texts what is........... your favorite..... veggie dish

valorousimperial I really like peas...

wiz-texts omg theyre sweet!

valorousimperial But they get stuck in my teeth

wiz-texts 0-0

valorousimperial The little casings do. The same with corn.

wiz-texts that reminds me of my next question but its ur turn first

valorousimperial What should always be on a sandwich?

wiz-texts food

valorousimperial Hah.

wiz-texts but meat i guess????? though i really like tomatoes tomatoes ARE the red ones right

wiz-texts n when th leaves r all crispy!!!! they taste sweetish n refreshin somehow??? idk i jus like it im just buildin a whole sandwich at this rate

wiz-texts mmm.......

wiz-texts what kinda teeth do you have?

valorousimperial Two rows of something awfully sharklike!

[[ Several Hours In The Future, Because I Heckin Fell Asleep... ]]

wiz-texts ....fallin asleep without rememberin that you even laid down is a surreal dang feelin

valorousimperial I know, right? I passed out without realizing I'd closed my eyes...

wiz-texts yea i had..... felt like some kinda multiple row thing was goin on. otherwise that mark in my shoulder wouldnt make as much sense also because peas stuck in shark teeth is a funny mental image

valorousimperial Shoosh!!

wiz-texts ha so, your turn if um. if were still playin

valorousimperial Hmm.. What's your favorite texture?

wiz-texts dang uh...... thats actually super hard bc i love experimentin with all kinds of textures

wiz-texts i guess my favorite.... kind? of texture? that would be stuff that feels soft like kitty fur!! purrbeast i mean

valorousimperial Why do you keep saying that??

wiz-texts sayin what

valorousimperial Purrbeast You, uh. You know that cat is the normally recognized word, don't you?

wiz-texts oh!

valorousimperial I've been saying cat,

wiz-texts no ive just heard purrbeast n meowbeast used by trolls a bunch so i figured itd be considerate to switch when im talkin to trolls.....

valorousimperial Oh.

wiz-texts ive been tryin to make it a habit...... well now i just feel silly, ha

valorousimperial ' - beast' is generally lowblood vernacular Which I'm trying to phase out by providing better education. Descriptive naming is a habit that trolls without access to worthwhile education picked up so they could communicate ideas.

wiz-texts whoa. i had no idea

valorousimperial I mean, honestly, Mituna still adamantly calls the meowbeasts, so you do what you like, but We do call them cats. So if you don't want to, you don't have to correct yourself, and most trolls will still know what you mean.

wiz-texts huh. okay thanks for th lesson there

valorousimperial Happy to!

wiz-texts so..... my turn.....

valorousimperial It is!

wiz-texts do you want to meet today? it um. its okay if you dont, of course

valorousimperial Mm... We probably should.

wiz-texts so youre.... youre okay w that?

valorousimperial Yes, but Not RIGHT this second, if you don't mind...

wiz-texts oh um, right. of course so... when, then?

valorousimperial It's just that I have a guest right now So maybe not too long, maybe an hour or so.

wiz-texts oh!! oh right, okay. wouldnt wanna impose or nothin, of course

valorousimperial Hours in the future, but like one: -------------------- Okay, I'm ready.

wiz-texts me too. comin back now

valorousimperial You said that before. Except now I can't say 'the hall between my block and yours' because you'll get lost now.

wiz-texts oops

valorousimperial So, I'll just Come to yours.

wiz-texts alright. im still headin over so i guess well see who shows up first

#logs #valorousimperial #the wiz drama

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